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#(pen if you see this lmao rip)
thychesters · 4 months
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#wipwednesday! haven't done one in a long time lmao. me writing more zolu? omg? who is she ...
anyway, luffy and zoro sparring on the deck of the sunny because "i thought you were watching the ship." "i was watching the ship. sometimes that just so happens to entail luffy trying to roundhouse kick me in the head for attention." boys will be boys. they're flirting
i'm only mildly mostly losing my mind writing this but the rough draft is coming along nicely! coaxing myself into having a full draft done at some point eventually
“C’mon!” he wheedles, nudging Zoro’s side with his knees, and for a moment it’s any other day—any other time the two of them are relegated to ship watch and watching Zoro meditate had entertained him for all of five seconds. “Fine,” he grouses after the third kick. He climbs to his feet, back to the late morning sun. “Swords or no swords?”  “You holding back?” “Don’t know if I wanna deal with another Franky lecture about ship care.” “Oh, yeah, he got really mad about the onigiri to the foremast.” “That’s not—” “Zoro’s stalling!” Luffy hoots, and Zoro’s comeback is interrupted when he pitches forward to press a wet raspberry to his cheek before rocketing back and darting toward the prow, pivoting to turn his back to the masthead and cackling all the while. “Zoro’s probably worried he can’t land a hit so he’s staaaaalling. Boooo.” “Oi,” he grunts, scrubbing at his cheek with the heel of his palm, “quit talking shit before I beat the shit out of you.” He tosses his head back, laugh bright and loud, and the corner of his mouth curls. “I don’t think you can!” “Dumbass,” he chides, shifting from amused to affronted because Luffy asked him to spar and he isn’t taking this seriously—bounding around the ship like a moron, stretching out his too-long limbs like he’s just showing off, and Zoro will endure the peacocking for another five seconds. “Hey!” “Sounds like Zoro’s mad he can’t catch me,” Luffy says like he’s talking to himself, beaming at him even as he zips through the air to the foremast, free hand lashing out to grab onto his hat. He can see in the tilt to his body, feet planted against the mast and body silhouetted by the sun Zoro’s squinting into—can see it in the way he tenses just so, coiling in on himself, and Zoro squares his stance. He’s about to get a head butt to the gut. “You gonna tag me in or what? You wanted to spar and instead I’m watching you bounce around. I could be drinking instead of this.”
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rainisheretovibe · 1 year
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its the year of our lord 2023 and @silverskye13 still makes me cry with their writing, anyways i doodled the boys, tangish and helskight are the best and the worst i hate them (affectionate)
closeups under the cut!!
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strawbeerossi · 4 months
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You Think, Genius?
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Pairing: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid
Description: Being friends with Spencer Reid is an adventure within itself. Movie nights are no exception.
Content/Warnings: Friends type humor, tension, mention of food/food fight, best friends to lovers trope, heavy kissing, very sweet smut (wild because I hardly write that, I feel like lmao).
Word Count: 2.7k
Anon Request: spencer reid x sarcastic funny reader? not mean but like kinda like Chandler from friends humour? with earlish seasons reid (season 3/4)ish cute smut. ADDING TO THE SARCASTIC!READER SHE AND SPENCE HAVE A BESTFRIENDS TO LOVERS ARC 🫶🫶
Navigation || Criminal Minds Masterlist || Request
RIP Matthew Perry, thank you for playing the king of sarcasm and being my inspiration for this. 🩷
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“Serial killers and childhood neglect have actually been linked together for years. Some of the most notorious serial killers were abused in some shape or fashion at home. Which makes sense whenever you take into account how easy it is to psychologically break a person and cause them to shut down, children being more receptive than most adults.” Spencer rambled on about some study he had been reading about.
Everyone was mostly tuned out besides you, your left hand holding the travel size cereal box up in clear view, your eyes wide. “That explains why I can’t stop eating this cereal! My mom made my life a living hell and now, all I think about is cereal. Oh god.” You said in a sarcastic tone, causing Derek to chuckle from his desk.
“She’s a cereal killer.” He joked while you both were giggling, making Spencer look between you and Derek, a confused expression on his face.
“She’s not a serial killer. I don’t think she’d be working here if she was one.”
The laughter continued on at your coworker’s obliviousness. “No, Spence,” JJ shook her head as she approached your chair, gently taking the little box before holding it up. “The joke is that she’s eating cereal. Cereal killer.” The blonde explained as you were turning back to Spencer.
“Oh, it’s no joke. I’ve got six bodies in my apartment right now. Just waiting to get home to do away with them.” You continued on, a little snort leaving your lips as you were getting your cereal back.
As you were pushing a handful in your mouth, you watched as Spencer looked at you with his head tilted to the side. “You haven’t killed anyone. I know that for a fact. You’re too nice.” He said while he was tapping his pen against his desk, JJ let out a huff and waved him off before she was walking away from your desk to get to her office.
“Isn’t there such a thing as killing people with kindness? That is my big move. I will be nice to them and boom,” You punched the palm of your hand to appear menacing. “I go in for the kill.”
Spencer was shaking his head with a soft giggle at the mere idea of it, your sarcasm slowly seeping through the cracks in an obvious way where he could see it.
“Right. How foolish of me to not understand it.” He joked softly while looking back down to the page he’d been doodling on. Your humor was new to Spencer, something he wasn’t really used to. You were a very sarcastic person, hardly ever having a conversation without injecting the encounter with your wit and sarcasm. He was still pretty clueless with it, however he felt he was getting better. Especially now that you had him saying his own sarcastic phrases at random times. It was weird for the rest of the team seeing the way you’d slowly brought Spencer out of that little bubble he was used to.
He was always the one who didn’t understand jokes or take sarcasm, appearing confused a good chunk of his career from the jokes and lighthearted banter. Being friends with you was a good way to learn how to understand though, which was why he was so lucky that you were his best friend.
“I was thinking of watching a movie. Do you wanna join me?” You asked, packing up your things as you looked over at Spencer as he raised an eyebrow.
“Tonight?” He asked, making you shake your head.
“No. Next week.” You answered with a deadpan expression while he crinkled his nose.
“You’re.. Being sarcastic..” He began while you rolled your eyes fondly with a smile.
“You think, genius? Come on, are you gonna come over or not?” You asked while putting your bag over your shoulder.
“I don’t see why not. Can we watch that new show that’s airing tonight?” He asked curiously, already following you out of the bullpen. He knew you’d give him a ride rather than sending him to go on the metro and meet you there later.
“Sure. I’ve been interested in it anyway. The new sci-fi one, right?” You asked as you made it to the parking garage with him as you were both in search of your car.
“Yes! It actually looks very interesting because from what I’ve read, they don’t make up their own rules as they go. They are using actual scientific data and evidence.” He gushed while you were clapping your hands together.
“Like learning in school! Oh how I loved school!” You were laughing as he had taken notice of the sarcasm and nudged your arm.
“Seriously. It’s going to be great! You may not think it now but you’ll enjoy it while learning about the real world when it comes to tech and space exploration.”
“We’ll have to see about that Dr. Reid.”
The ride back to your apartment was peaceful, the sounds of some radio station filling the quiet atmosphere of the car as you passed by numerous street signs. The comfortable silence was something you liked, never needing to strike up a conversation to enjoy Spencer’s company. Even if he was just reading while you were on your phone.
Back at your apartment, you’d just gotten the channel you needed pulled up, having about ten minutes until the show was supposed to air. Spencer made sure to tape it back at his own apartment, wanting to go back and watch alone to fully appreciate the show for more than its entertainment quality.
“Do you want me to run to the kitchen and get snacks?”
“You don’t have to run, Reid. You can walk.”
“Ha ha. So funny. Snacks or not?”
You were waving him off with a little laugh, offering a smile. “Yeah, yeah. Please go get some snacks. I think I have a big bag of that buttered popcorn you’re obsessed with.”
Spencer practically skipped to the kitchen upon hearing the news, retrieving one of your mixing bowls from one of your cupboards. After filling it up generously with the snack of choice, he was stopped by the fridge to grab two water bottles. With the two cold beverages under his arm, he was hurrying to the living room.
“I think we are all set.” He beamed with pride while placing the bowl on the table.
“Perfect. You’re right on time. It should start after these commercials.” You informed him while leaning forward to get a handful of popcorn from the bowl. While pushing a piece of popcorn into your mouth, you were only raising an eyebrow when you felt a pair of eyes on you. “What?” You asked, head turning to face Spencer as he quickly put his hands up in self defense.
“Nothing! I just wanted to see if it was good, that's all.”
“Right. I hate to tell you this, it tastes like buttered garbage. I don’t think you should subject yourself to eating it.” You joked, picking up a piece before flicking it in his direction, his eyes widening as he felt the snack hit his cheek.
“That could’ve taken out my eye!”
“Too bad it didn’t. We could get you an eyepatch.”
That was when Spencer took it a step further, getting a small handful of popcorn before throwing it in your direction. He was too busy laughing at your expression that mirrored his shock from earlier, pieces of popcorn in your hair and some on the couch.
“Is it a war that you want?”
“Me? You started it! Call it returned fire.”
That kickstarted a popcorn fight that didn’t seem to let up. Spencer was reaching into the now empty bowl before letting his eyes widen. He had no more ammo yet you had two handfuls. He was done for.
“You can apologize and we can end this.” You warned, your body now propped up on your knees as you had eventually turned to face him on the couch. “Just one ‘I’m sorry’ can end this bloodshed.”
“Never.”
“Suit yourself, Reid.” You were winding back one hand whenever Spencer was moving quickly to grip your wrist. There was some screaming, some laughing, and eventually you were being wrestled down onto the couch.
“Drop it!” Spencer laughed, both of your wrists being pinned down. “You do that and this will be all over.”
“No way.” You laughed, panting as you were being pinned down, some of Spencer’s long hair tickling the skin of your cheeks. You had both been in that position for a few more minutes before things calmed down, leaving you and the man above you to stare at one another and wait to reach a stalemate.
There was a growing tension, your faces only inches apart as he had you trapped between his body and the couch. Those beautiful eyes were looking down at you, almost as if Spencer was using the close proximity to take in every feature on your face. It was enough to make your face flush, cheeks hot from his gaze fixed on you and only you. The sound of the opening credits for the show you were supposed to be watching was playing in the background yet you could only look at each other.
There wasn’t a beat missed as he leaned down, lips against yours in a soft, yet cautious kiss. He felt like he had to play it safe, although the way you were feverishly returning the kiss told him all that he needed to know.
There was a fiery passion as your lips slotted together, almost as if they were made for one another. Your hands were moving to tangle in his hair, legs now wrapped around his waist as you both gave in to your urges that were always bubbling under the surface for however long you’d known the loveable genius.
It felt right, in a way. The way your were wrapped in one another’s embrace while having a moment of passion that you never expected to happen. However you had to admit, this was better than you ever thought.
Spencer was pulling out of the kiss, face flushed as he stared down at you with a shy smile. “It felt right. I’m sorry.” He whispered, only being pleased with the way you responded by pulling him down to connect your lips again, wanting to savor another moment as if he were going to disappear in thin air if you let him get too far.
The kiss had escalated soon enough, both of your clothes in a pile on the floor as you were tangled up on the couch, nothing but underwear separating you from each other. “Are you sure that you want this?” Spencer soon asked, his forehead against yours. Your friendship was always special to him, so naturally, he was worried about preserving those positive memories and the relationship as a whole.
“Definitely sure. I’ve thought about this for years.” For once, you were genuine. There was no hint of sarcasm dripping from your tone. That’s how he knew this was serious. “I’ve always loved you. I know you know that because I tell you all the time but it’s.. It's different than loving your best friend.”
Your confession had Spencer’s cheeks bright red, head nodding slowly to show he was paying attention. “Y-yeah. I love you more than a friend too.” He said slowly while he was bringing his hands down your hips, his fingertips tracing over your hot skin as he was hooking his fingers in the waistband of your panties.
Your hips lifted to assist him tugging your underwear down, your own cheeks hot from being exposed in one of your most intimate areas. It wasn’t like you hadn’t had sex before and you had confidence when you did but this seemed different.
“I need.. Hold on.” Spencer began while pushing himself up a bit, your watching with a raised eyebrow as you propped yourself up on your elbows. He went for his slacks, getting his wallet.
“Are you gonna pay me for this?”
“What?! No! I-I just..” He began, shuffling through the wallet before he was pulling a condom from one of the wallet folds.
“You have a condom? You were planning for this?”
“No! I have.. I asked Derek for one. Obviously not for tonight but I had to be prepared!” He said quickly while tossing his wallet on the table.
You didn’t tease him any farther, instead your eyes gazing over his body as he was shimmying out of his boxers while standing. Just kissing you had his cock semi-hard, his hand wrapping around his shaft to give a few pumps in order to complete the process although it wasn’t too hard with the anticipation of what was to come tonight.
After sliding on the contraception, he was heading over to get settled between your legs. His eyes were glancing over your glistening pussy, your arousal shining in the dim light of the living room. “Wow.” He whispered, hand moving between your thighs as his thumb pressed against your throbbing clit. The pressure alone was enough to make your mouth go slack.
“Fuck.” You breathed while feeling the pad of his thumb start to rub your clit, your arousal coating it with each swipe. He was taking his time with teasing you, at least.
When he was finished with massaging the bundle of nerves and he couldn’t hold back any more, he was grabbing his cock before lining his tip along with your entrance, thick tip breaching your slick cunt as he was slowly pushing into you when you were both ready enough.
There was a pleasurable burn as he was stretching out your inner walls, your hands tightly gripping onto his shoulders as you pulled his body down onto yours just to feel his skin against yours. It was oddly more intimate than you could’ve expected, even with him staying perfectly still with his cock nestled deep inside of you.
There was a soft gasp leaving your lips when he gave a slow thrust, just testing the waters for now as he didn’t wanna go too crazy before you were ready. He didn’t plan on going super hard anyway, that wasn’t who he was. “You alright?”
“Yeah. Yeah. Keep going.” You urged.
Once you proved comfortable enough due to your persistence, Spencer’s thrusts began to pick up a steady pace and rhythm. Your moans were enough encouragement for him to feel confident enough in the act, not shying away from you as much as anyone would’ve expected.
They rhythmic sound of his skin slapping against yours coupled with your gasps, shaky breaths and moans were filling the living room, the long forgotten show still filling the background noise. Spencer had since embraced you, one arm wrapped under your frame as the other kept himself pushed up over you. He just wanted to feel you close, to hold you as he made love to you.
It was beautiful to him, the way you were holding him and keeping him close in return. It was like you were the only people in the world, no responsibilities other than being close to one another. The warmth of your flushed skin against his was all he needed to be happy.
It was a dream, essentially. A dream so vibrant that Spencer didn’t want it to end, even if he knew that realistically he couldn’t be in a dreamland forever.
As he was torn from his thoughts at the feeling of your hands on his cheeks, he was offering you a smile as you were locking eyes with one another. “I love you.” He said softly, repeating what you’d both confessed earlier while leaning down to press his lips against yours.
It was after the fact whenever you were finally speaking again, body sitting up from the spot you were in on the couch as Spencer had retreated to the kitchen to dispose of the used condom. “Do you wanna come take a shower with me? No funny business.” You put your hands up in defense.
“No. It’s too personal for me to see you naked.” For the first time, Spencer was the one to be sarcastic with you, making you both burst into laughter.
“I’ve taught you well. Come on.”
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spncvr · 2 months
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waiting room | s. reid
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summary: spencer can't seem to escape the girl in the waiting room
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader
warnings: mentions of reid's addiction & tobias hankel, mentions of kidnapping and mass shootings (in, like, a joking way??) my terrible, terrible humour, ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE LMAO, this is deffo terrible, pls tell me if i missed anything!!
a/n: ok idk if i wanna continue this and make it a series so lmk lol (also im on writers block so i literally can't come up with SHIT)
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SPENCER REID WAS a pessimist.
At least, that’s what he’d call himself. His colleague, Derek Morgan would most likely (and by most likely, he means, definitely already has) call him an overanalysing introvert. But in Spencer’s defense, there has never really been a good reason to go out and “live your life”. Consider this:
Go to the new coffee shop? Mass shooting.
Go to the mall? A child gets abducted.
Leave the apartment for a short while? A stalker finds out where he lives, kidnaps him in his sleep, and, in a nightmarish turn, auctions off his organs to the bidder in the black market.
Besides, his life isn’t some John Green book. There were no life-affirming adventures or poetic moments of self-discovery awaiting him. Carpe diem? A fanciful notion for others, but for him, not so much. Sorry, Mr. Keating.
Yet life—or more accurately, bureau protocol— had its own plans. Ever since the Tobias Hankel incident, a visit to the psychologist wasn’t just a request but rather (unfortunately for him) an order. Which meant, he’d have to risk his entire life to get up and walk for ten whole minutes just to sit and wait, in this glaringly bright waiting room, when he could have stayed at home and read the new books he’d gotten from his team as a get-well gift.
Speaking of which, why the gifts? He was fine. Physically, at least. But really, when have you ever seen get-well-soon cards in an asylum? Well, alright, maybe he was being a little bit dramatic. A visit to the psychologist doesn’t mean he’ll be institutionalised—but then again, Spencer Reid was never one to wear rose-tinted glasses. 
This is his third time in the waiting room, and she’s always there. He isn’t sure as to why she is, because, well, unlike himself, she was very clearly an optimist—and at least, from the looks of it, she hasn’t been kidnapped and drugged in the past month. But she's sitting there again, in the exact same chair for the past three weeks, along with a beacon of smiles where joy usually fears to trend. Maybe, he isn't as good of a profiler as he’d like to think he is.
“Dr. Reid?” the call of his name rips him out of his thoughts. He looks up to see the same kind woman he’s seen the past three weeks—not the one in the waiting room, no, he means his therapist.
Dr. Brown was easy to profile: She wore heels to make herself look taller, and she hated wearing glasses, apparent by how she would continuously place them atop her head instead of her nose. Her teeth were abnormally perfect, which meant, she’d had to wear braces when she was younger—which (from his humbling experience) means she wasn’t exactly the most popular at school. Perhaps, psychology felt appealing to her because she could help people like her. 
“How are you?” she asks, her pen clicking.
Usually, he’d offer her a meek shrug. The kind that could win awards for its commitment to non-commitment. Besides, he’s not one to talk about how he feels—there isn’t much to say, anyway. And let’s face it,  “How are you?” in the grand tapestry of human interaction is almost as genuine as a three-dollar bill. And, get this, the average person asks “How are you?” 6,739 times a year but only listens to the answer about half the time—well, okay, maybe those numbers might have been fabricated, but isn’t the sincerity behind the question also made up? But instead of telling her all this, he remembers what Hotch had told him, one, two, three weeks ago: that he ought to cooperate with Dr. Brown or the board won’t be happy. So, he kisses his teeth before he says:
“Fine. I’m fine.”
And the session went on.
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PLS TELL ME IF I SHLD CONTIUE OR NOT LOLOLOL spam my inbox with ideas I BEG.
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moonmunson · 29 days
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either way / no doubt
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a/n: either way and no doubt by Odie Leigh have been on repeat currently and I relate to them so heavily so I word vomited on a Google docs. its a little rushed but oh well LMAO (I'm also always writing with a plus sized reader in mind)
cw: over thinker fem!reader, autistic coded reader, not knowing how to enter into a first serious relationship, kind lover boy!Eddie, no use of y/n
wc: 2.1k
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It is the beginning of Spring when she meets Eddie Munson. Genuinely meets him, not just sees him around town and wonders what it’s like to be in his orbit. Working at the local diner, she sees him and his group of friends often. She’s served them a couple times, and they’re always respectful - albeit rambunctious. They tip well, stack their dishes for the busboys to clear, wave to her on the way out. 
It’s the day Eddie comes in by himself that marks it as different, new. He sits in her section of the diner, glances her way and then averts his gaze when she meets it. That’s odd, but she doesn’t think much else of it. Not until the end of his meal - consisting of a solitary cup of coffee and a slice of apple pie - does he stop her when she checks to see if he needs anything. 
He asks if she’d want to hang out sometime, and she laughs - a forced exhale of nerves. He asks why she’s laughing, and she doesn’t know what to say. After a few moments of awkward silence, she relents and shrugs. What would we do? He says anything she wants. What if she doesn’t know what she wants to do? He says they’ll figure it out together. 
They end up sitting in the back of Eddie’s van, the open doors facing Lover’s Lake. She’s fidgety, and stumbling over her words. He keeps staring at her when she talks and she’s not used to anybody doing this much work to stay focused on her and what she has to say, especially because she’s not saying much of substance. He asks her so many questions, and mundane ones at that. How are classes at the community college? What’s your major? She answers as best she can. 
The feeling of someone looking at her makes her skin crawl. She doesn’t know what to do with her hands, she’s uncomfortably aware of the position of her nose on her face, which seems incredibly silly, and then she’s thinking about just how silly that is when he asks her if she’s alright. 
“Sorry?”
“I was just asking if you felt alright. It looked like you went away for a second there,” Eddie ducks his head down to catch her line of sight. Eye contact has always been difficult for her, but this is different - warm - like sunshine. “I know I’m not the most exciting person to talk to, but I hope you’re having a good time. I enjoy talking to you.” 
“I’m here, sorry. I like talking to you too.”
“You don’t have to apologize, it’s okay.”
“Sorry. Oh-” She sucks in a breath and places her hand over her mouth, eyes wide at the realization of her mistake. He giggles, a sweet boyish sound, and it warms his face. She thinks she could love that face, if he let her. If she knew how. She laughs too, despite herself. “It’s a bad habit. I really have to stop apologizing so much.” 
He’s still smiling when he says it’s okay, he understands. 
Later, when he drops her off at her apartment, the sun has gone down. The ride he’d offered her is relatively quiet. It’s a strange thing, to see the way someone adjusts themself around you. The usual loud heavy metal is absent here. The fast driving and sharp turns are traded in for complying with the speed limit, graceful steering and soft brakes. When he looks at her, she directs her gaze out the window - when she looks at him, he is focused on the road. 
He stops her as she takes off her seatbelt and goes to open the door, jumping out of his own and running around the front of the van to open it for her. She leads him to her front door, and he asks if he can see her again, if he can have her number. She nods, and rummages around her purse for a few frantic seconds before finding her waitress notepad and pen. When she rips the page out that she’s written her number on and hands it to him, he clutches it to his chest and smiles.  
“I’ll call you when I get home, if that’s okay. Just to let you know I made it back safely.”
“And if I want to keep talking to you?”
“We can talk for as long as you want to.” 
“Okay.” 
Eddie walks backwards for a few seconds, keeping his eyes locked on hers, paper still against his heart. By the time he’s made it back to his van, he lifts a hand up for a short wave goodbye, and turns to face the vehicle. 
Now or never. 
“Eddie?” In true Munson fashion, he whips around completely at the sound of her calling out to him. 
“Yeah, sweets?” 
“I just wanted to tell you I had a really nice time with you today. I can’t wait for you to call me later.” She tucks her hair behind her ears, needing to do something with her hands to offset the nausea brought about by her impulsive vulnerability. He smiles wider, if that’s even possible. 
“I’m glad you had a good time. I’ve been wanting to ask you out forever, Gareth and the guys kept busting my balls about it. I promise I’ll call when I get home.” 
She nods, her eyes tracking his steps as he makes it to his car. She watches him drive off. It feels so strange, this immediate wanting him to come back, wanting him to come inside and crawl into her brain. To know her fully. It scares her in a way she’s incredibly unused to. When she can’t hear the music blasting from his speakers anymore, she makes her way inside and slumps against the door for a few seconds. 
He does call when he gets home, and they talk until the sun rises. 
__
They spend the next few days talking on the phone. It’s easier like this, she thinks. She doesn’t have to worry about the way she looks when she’s thinking of something to say. She doesn’t have to avoid his white hot gaze, the way she can feel it trail over her face when she’s speaking. If he notices how much more she opens up to him when they’re not actively sitting next to each other, he doesn’t mention it. 
When they’re not on the phone, he clings to her brainspace like moss on a tree. She can’t stop thinking about him, to the point she’s worried she’s obsessing over something that isn’t there. He’d said he had a good time, he said he enjoyed talking to her, so why does it keep bothering  her so much? He feels safe. He does feel safe, but she’s not used to conversations with no expectations. No guise, no hidden agenda. If he notices the way she starts to pull away due to her overthinking, her sentences shorter and stunted, he doesn’t mention it. He carries on as usual, calling her to talk about what he’d done that day. It makes her smile. 
When he asks, unprompted, if he can see her again, she says yes. 
__
They go to the lake again. It is an early March morning, the last tendrils of Winter still grasping desperately for some kind of recognition against early Spring. He brings a blanket and hot cocoa for both of them, and she feels it in her chest - warm and sweet and chocolatey, like his eyes. It’s easier this time, talking to him. She spends less time worried about her posture and cadence - more time really listening to him speak and trying her hardest to maintain eye contact. 
The early morning breeze makes ripples on the otherwise still surface of the water. It’s so beautiful. He’s so beautiful. He’s so expressive when he speaks. She used to think he was careless, jumping on tables and riling up the people he knew didn’t like him. Seeing him up close like this, she realizes it’s kind of the opposite. It’s careful, planned, the way he uses his hands, his eyes. Even when he’s talking about a book he's read a million times, she feels like she's there among the scenery and characters he describes. It’s entirely captivating. She wants to be more like him. Carefully carefree. 
She’s never done this kind of thing - the relationship kind of thing. If that’s what this is, she has no idea how to traverse this new terrain. She can’t find her footing, she doesn’t know what the formula is, what the proper way to go about it looks like. She doesn’t think about sounding weird when she asks:
“What are we doing?” 
Eddie pauses mid sip, brings the cup back down to his lap. 
“Currently? Or like, with our lives?” He chuffs out a little laugh. Not in a teasing way, though it's hard for her to differentiate. “Because currently, from my perspective at least, I’m sitting in my van with a pretty girl talking about our favorite books. What I’m doing with my life is something a lot of people, including me, would really like to know.” 
Levity, she recognizes. 
“Sorry if it's a weird question, I just…” She trails off, breaking eye contact, looking at her hands in her lap. He scoots forward a bit, the side of his thigh touching hers as their legs dangle off the back of the van. He doesn’t push her to say anything, doesn’t acknowledge the unneeded apology, doesn’t fill the silence with his own voice.  He just waits, patiently. She doesn’t think she’s ever seen him sit this still. 
“I really like you, and I really like talking to you. I’ve never done anything like this,” She uses her pointer finger to gesture between the two of them, drawing a connecting line between their bodies, “I don’t know how to, if that makes sense. I’m not really a lot of people’s type, I guess.” 
“Hey, look at me,” Eddie sets the cup down next to him and very gently takes her hand, locks their fingers together. When she raises her eyes to meet his, he continues. “There’s no rush, I mean it. You set the pace here, okay? I like you, like a lot. If all you wanna do is sit here and talk, I’m totally fine with that. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”  
“Yeah?” 
“Yeah, sweets.” 
“What if you find out how weird I am and decide you don’t want to talk to me anymore?” 
At this, Eddie relinquishes his grip on her hand, hops down from the lip of the back of the van, and stands in front of her. 
“Y’know who you’re talking to?” two thumbs pointed towards himself - eyebrows raised, mouth quirked in a goofy grin, “King of the freaks, misfits, and ne'er do wells. I don’t think you could scare me off, but you’re certainly welcome to try.” 
“So just… be myself?” She scrunches her face up - the idea of being genuine is almost totally foreign to her. 
“Be yourself!” 
“Ew. Yeah, alright, fine.” She sighs in resignation and shrugs a shoulder. Doesn’t think about how convincing he is, or how willing she was to drop some of her defenses. Carefully carefree. She can do it. 
They share a laugh, finishing their luke-warm cocoa together and talking until the sun is high in the sky and the temperature rises too high for them to ignore any longer. This time, the drive home is less quiet. She meets his gaze when he looks over at her from the driver’s seat, she hums along to the sound of the radio, it's nice. Comfortable. 
Just like last time, Eddie hastens to run around the van and open her door for her. He extends a hand to help her down and out, and they stay connected on the short journey to her apartment’s front door. Eddie watches while she digs the keys out of her purse, unlocking the door and leading the both of them inside for a drink. He kicks his shoes off by the welcome mat, and they look like they belong there. 
It is the beginning of Spring when Eddie Munson permanently plants himself in her life, a steadfast source of comfort and nourishment. It is hard for her, and it takes longer than most for her to truly open up. To show him all the nooks and crannies of her mind. He takes it all in stride - her overthinking, her quirks and neuroses. He shows her that it is entirely impossible to trust someone enough to take part in the watering and flowering - that it's not a weight she has to hold alone. She can bloom.
__
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bully⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
thursday, sung hanbin— poetry ii
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⋆˙⟡ zbully1 smut series masterlist! hanbin, jiwoong, hao, matthew, and taerae included. game day (group) chapter here. all 7 endings here.
⋆˙⟡ wc: 3.5k (it's a doozy but it's worth it i literally am so happy with this one)
⋆˙⟡ reader: femme afab (listed first, she/her are used) // gender neutral (alternate version listed second, no pronouns used at all to describe reader— scroll down)
⋆˙⟡ series summary: five bullies. six days. it's gonna be a hell of a week, babe. stay hydrated.
⋆˙⟡ thursday summary: thursday. good news: the week is almost over. bad news: you're stuck in poetry class with sung hanbin as your desk partner. it's weird. sometimes you play off each other so well, you're nearly blindsided by his sudden flipping of the switch. if only you could steal a glimpse at his journal.
⋆˙⟡ warnings: explicit smut. 18+. minors do not interact. please read specific smut warnings under the cut! swearing. angst. slight dub-con. bullying. very toxic softboi/popular soccer star hanbinnie. guys THE LORE. you very well may not survive til the end of the week but we're already on this journey together so let's see it through!!! smut in gn and fem versions are slightly different due to logistics/circumstance. also there's two parts i wrote in here that made me laugh way too hard okay bye. xx
⋆˙⟡ bully scale: ★★★★☆(4.5)
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EXPLICIT SMUT 18+ WARNINGS: choking (reader receiving and safely executed lmao), chest groping/brief nipple play (reader receiving; reader is wearing a bra and hanbin refers to you as having 'tits'), heavy petting (reader and hanbin receiving), fingering (brief, reader receiving), erotic humiliation and degradation (towards reader; about looseness of pussy after this week/disappointing chest but not the size of it he's just being a dick am i making sense), slut and whore used to describe reader, one slap across the face (reader receiving), slight dub-con but we know how reader rolls now lol. hanbin is insanely toxic. enjoy.
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˚    ✦   .  .   ˚ .      . ✦ 
scribble. scribble. scribble. 
the scratchings of your pencil in your poetry journal are growing increasingly violent. you don’t really care. you’d stayed up all night: tossing and turning and thinking and plotting. 
“hey, uh... you okay?” hanbin asks, tapping you gently with the end of his pen. your pencil falls from your fingers as you’re jolted from your anxious thought spiral. 
“huh?” you reply, blinking at the star of the soccer team. “oh, um. yeah. i’m okay.”
hanbin’s brow raises slightly at your answer as if it surprises him. “you sure?”
“yeah,” you reply as nonchalantly as possible. “why?”
you follow hanbin’s line of sight to the open page of your poetry journal. you’ve absentmindedly ripped a significant hole through several pages with your vortex of nervous scribbling.
you breathe an awkward laugh, closing your journal and putting your pencil down flat on your desk.
“you had a rough week,” hanbin says, grabbing his journal from his bag and placing it on his desk. you bite your cheeks to keep from grinning at the sight of your target. “or so i’ve heard.”
“i’m sure you have,” you mumble, glancing at the tile floor. “i’m sure everybody has.”
“they haven’t,” he replies definitively and you know he’s telling the truth. “i promise they haven’t.”
hanbin was a tricky one. the star of the soccer team and undoubtedly the most popular boy at your university, it comes as no surprise that he was also the makeshift ring leader of his stupid group of friends. keeping that spotlight also meant keeping up appearances. while your other bullies made their distaste for you known whenever possible, hanbin had a different preferred method of torture.
he liked to play nice. compliment your poems. share a laugh... reel you in.
until you were so close, you couldn’t escape. that’s when he’d flip the script on you. 
like when he sent your poem about the boy you liked to the entire university’s mailing list last year. you’d insisted you didn’t feel comfortable sharing it with him. you recoiled with embarrassment at the thought of junseo, your senior lab partner, finding out. but he pushed. made you think you could trust him.
the next day, it was pinned to every bulletin board across campus next to a picture of you that hanbin had taken on your class trip to the national library. like some sort of sick calling card.
junseo sunbae-nim never muttered more than a word to you ever again.
so that’s how all this started. hanbin recruiting his three (and then four) asshole friends in a sudden and violent quest to become the bane of your existence. 
sometimes you still can’t help but wonder if you’d done something to upset him. but you shake off that thought each time. you won’t let him get in your head again so easily.
you’ve about mustered the courage to give hanbin some snarky response when your professor’s chalk hatchings across the blackboard send a hush over the classroom.
“good afternoon, everyone,” professor choi greets happily, underlining today’s date on the board. “let’s jump right in today and start with our weekly journals. please share with your desk partner the poem that this week so far inspired you to write.”
your eyes fix on hanbin’s journal again, anticipation stirring as you think about the clues that could be hidden in his poem this week. could the answers you’re looking for really be inside that black, leather book?
“you should go fi—,” you start to suggest a bit too quietly before hanbin unknowingly cuts you off.
“do you wanna go first?” he asks brightly, smile lines illuminating his soft features. you know you shouldn’t indulge him, but you can never stop the corners of your lips from involuntarily turning up in response. no matter how much you hated him, his fairytale prince looks were undeniable.
“oh, uh,” you stammer, grabbing your journal and flipping it open to your entry from this week. you look at the poem you wrote, eyes scanning over the emotional stanzas as you bite your lip uneasily. “i dunno. i kind of got a bit too... personal this week.”
“oh, you know i don’t mind,” he replies calmly. “that’s what poetry is, right?”
“i’m well aware you don’t mind me spilling personal details to you,” you reply with a glare. “but i mind.”
“(y/n)-sshi,” professor choi’s voice suddenly rings over your shoulder. “let’s get reading, okay? time is limited.”
you swallow hard, looking down at your journal shamefully. “yes, professor-nim.”
“so what’s it called?” hanbin asks as professor choi makes her way back up to her desk, folding his arms across his chest and leaning back into his chair. “your poem?”
“the bird,” you answer softly. “it’s called the bird.”
he nods pensively before gesturing for you to start. you look back down at the page, fingers shaking as you try to hold your journal steady. clearing your throat, you recite:
“from her perch at the window, she will never be much. the vultures jeered at her as they circled above. then one flew down— with taloned-hand, he did touch. and a meek little finch turned into a dove. if a dove she can be, she will be it as such. til another vulture fell to his knees with a glove. parted her feathers and took her in his clutch. and from the fair bird, made a raven thereof. she needs to change back, so she tries to stay hush. but a third brash vulture throws her off with a shove. the reluctant truth is she’s filling with lust... and she’s growing quite scared of the bird she’ll become.”
you blink back tears as you close your journal and place it on your desk in front of you. maybe it’s your lack of sleep or the mentally and physically jarring week you’ve had, but reading your poem aloud had left you feeling quite vulnerable.
“that was beautiful, (y/n),” hanbin says suddenly, prying you from your regret. you turn to him, eyes wide as he nods thoughtfully. “i really appreciated the metaphor of the bird. the vultures are considered bad birds, but somehow they changed the subject from an unassuming bird into the more beautiful bird she seemed to want to be... but never thought she could.”
you stare at him as he glances up at the ceiling, those handsome smile lines crinkling his cheeks again.
“funny how things we could perceive as wrong or immoral can actually have a positive effect on us,” he muses with a chuckle. “but it’s only natural for the bird to question that change. she’s done more of that ‘bad’ thing and now she’s afraid it’s turned her into a raven. a bird that frightens her. or maybe a bird she can’t recognize anymore when she looks in the mirror.”
“it did,” you assert quietly. “it did change her.”
“but it sounds like she likes that change. at least part of her,” hanbin rebuts, meeting your gaze. “perhaps if she embraces that and sheds her own guilt— or molts, if you will— she’ll realize the raven is another distortion of her own making, just like the finch was. she’ll realize she is the dove and she always has been.”
your lips part as you gape at hanbin in awe. it was hard not to let your guard down with him when he always dissected your poems so intuitively like this. memories of intense public humiliation are the only thing that can keep you grounded.
“or,” he adds, a small smirk upturning the corner of his lips. “i guess she could also realize that ravens and vultures aren’t the bad birds she thinks they are. maybe she finds that, after all this worrying, she was meant to be a vulture, too.”
“under a minute left,” professor choi calls out from the front of the classroom.
shit. hanbin had talked so much about your poem that he barely had any time left to share his— the poem you desperately needed to be shared in the first place.
hanbin’s still rambling on about vultures, but you’re not paying any attention as a wave of panic rushes over you. 
“you should share yours still,” you prompt a little too eagerly, cutting him off mid-sentence. trying your best to dial it back, you add, “i’m sure it’s very interesting, what with the big game on saturday and all.”
hanbin smiles, holding your gaze for a moment too long. it’s suspicious, but his eyes give nothing away.
“if it’s okay with you, i’d rather not share this week,” he says, throwing his journal back in his bag. “i got a little too... how did you put it? personal.”
you blink at him. “but—. but that’s what i said and you—.”
hanbin mutters something under his breath that you swear sounds like, “not like you’d listen to me anyway.”
but you must’ve misheard him.
your heart sinks, your plan crumbling to ashes before your eyes as professor choi launches into a lecture about wilfred owen’s 20th century use of assonance. hanbin had to have written something about what his friends had been up to. that’s why he used up so much time focusing on your poem. 
your pencil moves across your paper, absentmindedly taking notes until you reach the only possible conclusion: you can’t give up. you’ll just have to amend the plan.
after class, you hurriedly gather your things and run out the door, pulling your phone out and typing vigorously as you make your way to the bathroom.
WHEN DOES THE BOYS’ SOCCER PRACTICE GO UNTIL TONIGHT!? mina: ??? NO QUESTIONS. JUST ANSWERS. mina: jiwoong oppa is picking me up at 7. so i assume about 6:30. THANK U BYE and... please be careful around him. mina: yeah, yeah, yeah i’ll use protection ily
totally not what you meant. and you’d hate to break it to her, but after his little stunt on monday, you’re not sure how fond her jiwoong oppa would be of that request.
6:30. practice would start soon, giving you plenty of time to slip into the boys’ locker room, read hanbin’s journal, and slip out undetected. 
you catch a glimpse of yourself in the bathroom mirror.
a raven’s beady eyes stare back.
~
you kill some time in the library, waiting until practice is well underway before making your way across campus to the gymnasium. your heart is already pounding in your ears just thinking about the little heist you’re about to pull.
but your legs keep propelling you forward.
pulling open the building door, you step inside cautiously. the women’s badminton team is stretching in the atrium of the building, but there’s no sign of anyone else. you head right down the hallway, walking past the cardio fitness center and the weight-lifting gym until you’re in front of the boys’ locker room door.
you put an ear to it, hearing nothing but the whirring of a fan on the other side.
fuck it.
you pull open the door and step inside, white and grey tiled walls and rows of blue lockers surrounding you. your heart races as you look back at the door, wondering if it’s not too late to abandon your mission.
you shake your head. no. you need to find that journal.
with a steadying breath, you begin to walk through the first row of lockers. when you don’t spot hanbin’s bag, you proceed to the second row. and then the next. and then the next until you finally spot it.
tucked under the wooden bench running down the middle of the aisle is a familiar brown, leather messenger bag. you run to it, picking it up from the floor and setting it down on the bench. you unclasp the latch on the front of the bag and lift the flap, opening it up and reaching inside it.
your hand hits something... fluffy. you grab the fuzzy item and pull it out, squealing when you see that it’s a tiny, cream-colored hamster plush. it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen in your whole goddamn life. 
and you are disappointed to find yourself thinking it bears a striking resemblance to its owner.
you stuff the little hamster back into the bag. as cute as he is, it’s not what you came here for. you gasp when you feel the cold leather-bound journal in your hand, pulling it out hurriedly and examining the cover.
you open the journal, flipping through the pages rashly until you locate an entry with today’s date at the top. it reads:
“if one is a vulture, it’s assumed they’re no good— despite all the research that they’re helpful to earth. does the finch know that if that vulture could, he’d hunt for a mirror and show her her worth? if that finch is a dove, there’d be something that would still keep her away from achieving true mirth. it’s the vultures, she’d cry before she understood: the vulture has always been a sign of rebirth. a dove, raven, vulture, or finch from the woods, the vultures will find her and double their search. but for someone who claims they feel misunderstood, it’s repulsive the lengths she would go to unearth... something that does not belong to that bird. seems the dove was a raven afterall.”
“pretty good, huh?” the sudden voice behind you makes you jump. “wrote it in, like, ten minutes after class. what can i say? i was inspired.”
you don’t turn around. your face is already on fire from how mortified you are. of course, you’d considered the possibility of being caught. but you hadn’t really realized the weight of that consequence until this moment.
“actually, i think it might be even better than the original,” he continues, footsteps echoing against the tiled floors as he draws nearer. “i mean, you really should’ve thought to flesh out those vulture characters a bit. and you didn’t even consider looking up the well-known symbolism behind them.”
a hot breath fans across the back of your neck, causing you to shiver as a hand wraps around the leather-bound journal and pries it from yours.
“i have to admit, i didn’t really think you had it in you,” he says with a chuckle, fingers suddenly hooking into your waistband and turning you around to face him. he’s in his red and white soccer uniform, skin glistening from the practice meet he should be at right now. “but just in case, i wanted to be prepared. write you something worth reading.”
“h-how did you know?” you stutter quietly. “that i—”
“well, you weren’t exactly subtle, now were you?” hanbin smiles but the light doesn’t reach his eyes. “‘you should read your poem, hanbin. i’m sure it’s exciting with the big game coming up’. like you give a fuck about my poetry.”
that last sentence reminds you of what you thought you’d heard him mumble in class today: not like you’d listen to me anyway.
what was that about?
“aw, don’t get sad now that your plan didn’t go your way,” hanbin coos, lifting his hand to caress your cheek. “i thought it was kind of cute. i can forgive you for stealing, right? you just wanted my attention so badly that you had to play a bit dirty.”
you shake your head quickly. “no, it’s not like that! i swear i wasn’t trying to get your attention, i just—”
“well then, jesus fucking christ, what do i have to do to—,” hanbin snaps before promptly cutting himself off. there’s something in his eyes you’ve never seen before: desperation. 
a large hand wraps around your throat in an instant, shoving you up against a blue locker. the motion knocks the wind out of you and you find yourself gasping for air. your hand flies to remove his from around your neck, but he catches it in his free one and brings it gently back down to your side. 
“i told you in class that if you needed help calling off the vultures, you should ask me while you still can,” hanbin rasps, rubbing his thumb up the left side of your throat. “but you weren’t listening, dove. the gulper got first bite. the rippers tore you apart...”
you breathe shallowly, glancing from side to side for some route of escape.
“but now the king has landed,” he says, tongue flitting across his teeth. “and he’s fucking starving.”
you blink at him, lips parted in stupid shock. “i—... i honestly had no idea you knew so much about vultures.”
“THAT’S WHAT YOU TOOK FROM THAT ARE YOU KID—,” he yells, finger pads digging in tighter to the skin of your neck. his gaze falls to your lips, supple and pretty even in fear. he trails down to your shirt, a button-up front that seems to entice him. “take it off.”
“b-but—.”
“take it the fuck off, (y/n). you should know by now how this goes,” hanbin snarls, grabbing your hand and bringing it to the trail of buttons. you start to fiddle with them, but you have some trouble under the pressure of his gaze. “can’t even undo a button? hm? too fucking stupid, dove?”
you find yourself nodding against all odds.
“need binnie to do it for you?” he coos, smile lines illuminating his face again.
you just nod. it seems to be what you do best.
hanbin unfastens the buttons one-handed and with ease. once your shirt is open, he undoes the center clasp of your bra and exposes your chest. then, he sighs with dramatic disappointment. “seriously? that’s it? got me all excited to see your tits and this is what you have to show?”
you look down at your incredibly normal and attractive chest. you’d never really doubted the allure of that part of your body before. should you have?
the humiliating comment causes a lump to form in your throat... and an embarrassingly intense ache to shoot through your heat. 
he tugs the center hem of your shirt, pulling the fabric further off your shoulders. “it’s a good thing the other guys didn’t see them. they’re far more superficial than me. you should be grateful you found a guy who can look past the disappointment. ”
hanbin’s free hand gropes your chest, thumb rubbing circles around one nipple and then the next as you let out a soft whimper.
“mm, i heard that,” he breathes with a smirk. “even though you never hear me. probably didn’t even fucking clock the first line in that stupid poem. but i hear you, dove. so let me give you what you want. all you have to do is ask.”
you gulp, softly responding, “w-want you to... touch me.”
“yeah?” hanbin affirms, finger trailing down your stomach.
you nod again, this time more assuredly under the guise of his encouraging smile. that is, until a harsh slap stings your cheek.
“well that wasn’t a fucking question, was it?” hanbin hisses, rubbing soothing circles into your cheek with his thumb. “you’re in an advanced poetry class and you don’t even know how to form an interrogative sentence? just must be doodling all the time, huh? about all the boys who’ve made a mess of you this week? like the dumb little slut you are.”
hanbin’s free hand slips under your skirt, fingers brushing over your clothed core before pulling it out again. you gasp when you see his fingers already covered in your arousal.
his eyes darken as he reaches up your skirt again, tearing a hole right through your lace panties and stuffing two fingers inside of you immediately as you cry out. 
“oh, dove, why would i wanna put my cock in here, hm? can already feel how much those other assholes have stretched you out,” hanbin says with another sigh of disappointment. 
another bout of worry clouds your mind. was that true? was matthew right? you thought he was just being a misogynistic pig, but... had you really been physically tainted from the events of this week?
“so fucking lucky, dove,” hanbin whispers, removing his hand from your heat and taking one of yours. he brings it down the front of his athletic shorts and then wraps it around his impossibly hard length. you look up at him, wide-eyed. “where every other man would see damaged goods, i see prime real estate.”
“what—”
“gonna fuck you now, m’kay?” hanbin interjects, pulling his shorts down and exposing himself to you. you hadn’t really seen the other boys up close or at all like this. hanbin’s cock is pretty, long with just a few visible veins and a pink head that’s leaking a bit of pre-cum. it makes your mouth water. maybe you are a dumb slut.
maybe you like it like that.
or maybe it’s just hanbin’s large hand covering your throat, pressing at the sides tenderly that’s making you start to feel a bit high. he brings himself to your entrance, lining up the tip and coating it in your juices. he’s about to push himself inside of you, when he suddenly freezes.
“you want me to, right?” hanbin asks, tone suddenly much softer than it was before. his eyes are locked with yours, holding you there with him against the wall of lockers. “you want me inside you? just me. not those other guys? not junseo hyung-nim or—”
BEEEEEEEEEP. BRRANG. BRRANG. BRRANG. BEEEEEEEE....
a fire alarm rips through the locker room, loud and annoying as ever. you try to jump out of hanbin’s grasp, but his hands stay fixed around you. 
“let me... let me go!” you assert, hitting his chest with your palm. the pressure on your neck that felt so good just a few moments ago is now filling you with fear, “are you trying to kill me or something!?”
his brow raises slightly, as if he only just noticed the alarm. his grip loosens and you take the opportunity to scramble away from him. 
“of course i’m not,” he replies dejectedly, re-situating his shorts before huffing, “like you have a body worth going to jail for.”
“oh, shut up,” you retort, rolling your eyes as you race to re-button your shirt. “this is all YOUR fault. whatever’s going on this week, i know you’re behind it. you’ve run out of ideas to keep me small. but i’m not small. in fact, i’m a much bigger person than you are! so... i’m sorry for whatever i did that made you hate me so much in the first place. now, please, let’s get out of here.”
you start to run down the aisle of lockers towards the exit door, but a lack of footsteps behind you causes you to stop and turn back.
“come on,” you urge as hanbin continues to stand in place and stare at you, unmoving. it might be the most infuriating thing he’s done all day. “oh, fucking burn then.”
the tangible anger in your voice startles both of you. hanbin blinks quickly back at you, wide-eyed as if you’ve just slapped him across the face. whoever gave him the right to feel that way is sorely mistaken. you turn back around, throwing over your shoulder:
“are there birds worse than vultures?”
˚    ✦   .  .   ˚ .      . ✦ 
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gender neutral version below
EXPLICIT SMUT 18+ WARNINGS: choking (reader receiving and safely executed lmao), chest/abdomen groping (reader receiving; no anatomical descriptions or gender specific language), heavy petting (reader and hanbin receiving), finger penetration (brief, reader receiving), erotic humiliation and degradation (towards reader; regarding looseness of hole (non specific) from desperation and disappointing chest/abdomen region (not related to gender or anatomical gendered parts he's just being a dick to you i hope this makes sense)), slut and whore are also used but not in a gendered context, one slap across face (reader receiving), slight dub-con but we know how reader rolls now lol. hanbin is insanely toxic. enjoy.
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˚    ✦   .  .   ˚ .      . ✦ 
scribble. scribble. scribble. 
the scratchings of your pencil in your poetry journal are growing increasingly violent. you don’t really care. you’d stayed up all night: tossing and turning and thinking and plotting. 
“hey, uh... you okay?” hanbin asks, tapping you gently with the end of his pen. your pencil falls from your fingers as you’re jolted from your anxious thought spiral. 
“huh?” you reply, blinking at the star of the soccer team. “oh, um. yeah. i’m okay.”
hanbin’s brow raises slightly at your answer as if it surprises him. “you sure?”
“yeah,” you reply as nonchalantly as possible. “why?”
you follow hanbin’s line of sight to the open page of your poetry journal. you’ve absentmindedly ripped a significant hole through several pages with your vortex of nervous scribbling.
you breathe an awkward laugh, closing your journal and putting your pencil down flat on your desk.
“you had a rough week,” hanbin says, grabbing his journal from his bag and placing it on his desk. you bite your cheeks to keep from grinning at the sight of your target. “or so i’ve heard.”
“i’m sure you have,” you mumble, glancing at the tile floor. “i’m sure everybody has.”
“they haven’t,” he replies definitively and you know he’s telling the truth. “i promise they haven’t.”
hanbin was a tricky one. the star of the soccer team and undoubtedly the most popular boy at your university, it comes as no surprise that he was also the makeshift ring leader of his stupid group of friends. keeping that spotlight also meant keeping up appearances. while your other bullies made their distaste for you known whenever possible, hanbin had a different preferred method of torture.
he liked to play nice. compliment your poems. share a laugh... reel you in.
until you were so close, you couldn’t escape. that’s when he’d flip the script on you. 
like when he sent your poem about the boy you liked to the entire university’s mailing list last year. you’d insisted you didn’t feel comfortable sharing it with him. you recoiled with embarrassment at the thought of junseo, your senior lab partner, finding out. but he pushed. made you think you could trust him.
the next day, it was pinned to every bulletin board across campus next to a picture of you that hanbin had taken on your class trip to the national library. like some sort of sick calling card.
junseo sunbae-nim never muttered more than a word to you ever again.
so that’s how all this started. hanbin recruiting his three (and then four) asshole friends in a sudden and violent quest to become the bane of your existence. 
sometimes you still can’t help but wonder if you’d done something to upset him. but you shake off that thought each time. you won’t let him get in your head again so easily.
you’ve about mustered the courage to give hanbin some snarky response when your professor’s chalk hatchings across the blackboard send a hush over the classroom.
“good afternoon, everyone,” professor choi greets happily, underlining today’s date on the board. “let’s jump right in today and start with our weekly journals. please share with your desk partner the poem that this week so far inspired you to write.”
your eyes fix on hanbin’s journal again, anticipation stirring as you think about the clues that could be hidden in his poem this week. could the answers you’re looking for really be inside that black, leather book?
“you should go fi—,” you start to suggest a bit too quietly before hanbin unknowingly cuts you off.
“do you wanna go first?” he asks brightly, smile lines illuminating his soft features. you know you shouldn’t indulge him, but you can never stop the corners of your lips from involuntarily turning up in response. no matter how much you hated him, his fairytale prince looks were undeniable.
“oh, uh,” you stammer, grabbing your journal and flipping it open to your entry from this week. you look at the poem you wrote, eyes scanning over the emotional stanzas as you bite your lip uneasily. “i dunno. i kind of got a bit too... personal this week.”
“oh, you know i don’t mind,” he replies calmly. “that’s what poetry is, right?”
“i’m well aware you don’t mind me spilling personal details to you,” you reply with a glare. “but i mind.”
“(y/n)-sshi,” professor choi’s voice suddenly rings over your shoulder. “let’s get reading, okay? time is limited.”
you swallow hard, looking down at your journal shamefully. “yes, professor-nim.”
“so what’s it called?” hanbin asks as professor choi makes her way back up to her desk, folding his arms across his chest and leaning back into his chair. “your poem?”
“the bird,” you answer softly. “it’s called the bird.”
he nods pensively before gesturing for you to start. you look back down at the page, fingers shaking as you try to hold your journal steady. clearing your throat, you recite:
“from it’s perch at the window, it will never be much. the vultures jeered at it as they circled above. then one flew down— with taloned-hand, he did touch. and a meek little finch turned into a dove. if a dove it can be, it will be it as such. til another vulture fell to his knees with a glove. parted it’s feathers and took it in his clutch. and from the fair bird, made a raven thereof. it needs to change back, so it tries to stay hush. but a third brash vulture throws it off with a shove. the reluctant truth is it’s filling with lust... and it’s growing quite scared of the bird it will become.”
you blink back tears as you close your journal and place it on your desk in front of you. maybe it’s your lack of sleep or the mentally and physically jarring week you’ve had, but reading your poem aloud had left you feeling quite vulnerable.
“that was beautiful, (y/n),” hanbin says suddenly, prying you from your regret. you turn to him, eyes wide as he nods thoughtfully. “i really appreciated the metaphor of the bird. the vultures are considered bad birds, but somehow they changed the subject from an unassuming bird into the more beautiful bird it seemed to want to be... but never thought it could.”
you stare at him as he glances up at the ceiling, those handsome smile lines crinkling his cheeks again.
“funny how things we could perceive as wrong or immoral can actually have a positive effect on us,” he muses with a chuckle. “but it’s only natural for the bird to question that change. it’s done more of that ‘bad’ thing and now it’s afraid it’s been turned into a raven. a bird that’s frightening. or maybe a bird it can’t recognize anymore when it looks in the mirror.”
“it did,” you assert quietly. “it did change the bird.”
“but it sounds like the bird likes that change. at least part of it,” hanbin rebuts, meeting your gaze. “perhaps if it embraces that and sheds it’s own guilt— or molts, if you will— it’ll realize the raven is another distortion of the bird’s own making, just like the finch was. it’ll realize it is the dove and it always has been.”
your lips part as you gape at hanbin in awe. it was hard not to let your guard down with him when he always dissected your poems so intuitively like this. memories of intense public humiliation are the only thing that can keep you grounded.
“or,” he adds, a small smirk upturning the corner of his lips. “i guess it could also realize that ravens and vultures aren’t the bad birds it thinks they are. maybe it finds that, after all this worrying, the bird was meant to be a vulture, too.”
“under a minute left,” professor choi calls out from the front of the classroom.
shit. hanbin had talked so much about your poem that he barely had any time left to share his— the poem you desperately needed to be shared in the first place.
hanbin’s still rambling on about vultures, but you’re not paying any attention as a wave of panic rushes over you. 
“you should share yours still,” you prompt a little too eagerly, cutting him off mid-sentence. trying your best to dial it back, you add, “i’m sure it’s very interesting, what with the big game on saturday and all.”
hanbin smiles, holding your gaze for a moment too long. it’s suspicious, but his eyes give nothing away.
“if it’s okay with you, i’d rather not share this week,” he says, throwing his journal back in his bag. “i got a little too... how did you put it? personal.”
you blink at him. “but—. but that’s what i said and you—.”
hanbin mutters something under his breath that you swear sounds like, “not like you’d listen to me anyway.”
but you must’ve misheard him.
your heart sinks, your plan crumbling to ashes before your eyes as professor choi launches into a lecture about wilfred owen’s 20th century use of assonance. hanbin had to have written something about what his friends had been up to. that’s why he used up so much time focusing on your poem. 
your pencil moves across your paper, absentmindedly taking notes until you reach the only possible conclusion: you can’t give up. you’ll just have to amend the plan.
after class, you hurriedly gather your things and run out the door, pulling your phone out and typing vigorously as you make your way to the bathroom.
WHEN DOES THE BOYS’ SOCCER PRACTICE GO UNTIL TONIGHT!? mina: ??? NO QUESTIONS. JUST ANSWERS. mina: jiwoong oppa is picking me up at 7. so i assume about 6:30. THANK U BYE and... please be careful around him. mina: yeah, yeah, yeah i’ll use protection ily
totally not what you meant. and you’d hate to break it to her, but after his little stunt on monday, you’re not sure how fond her jiwoong oppa would be of that request.
6:30. practice would start soon, giving you plenty of time to slip into the boys’ locker room, read hanbin’s journal, and slip out undetected. 
you catch a glimpse of yourself in the bathroom mirror.
a raven’s beady eyes stare back.
~
you kill some time in the library, waiting until practice is well underway before making your way across campus to the gymnasium. your heart is already pounding in your ears just thinking about the little heist you’re about to pull.
but your legs keep propelling you forward.
pulling open the building door, you step inside cautiously. the women’s badminton team is stretching in the atrium of the building, but there’s no sign of anyone else. you head right down the hallway, walking past the cardio fitness center and the weight-lifting gym until you’re in front of the boys’ locker room door.
you put an ear to it, hearing nothing but the whirring of a fan on the other side.
fuck it.
you pull open the door and step inside, white and grey tiled walls and rows of blue lockers surrounding you. your heart races as you look back at the door, wondering if it’s not too late to abandon your mission.
you shake your head. no. you need to find that journal.
with a steadying breath, you begin to walk through the first row of lockers. when you don’t spot hanbin’s bag, you proceed to the second row. and then the next. and then the next until you finally spot it.
tucked under the wooden bench running down the middle of the aisle is a familiar brown, leather messenger bag. you run to it, picking it up from the floor and setting it down on the bench. you unclasp the latch on the front of the bag and lift the flap, opening it up and reaching inside it.
your hand hits something... fluffy. you grab the fuzzy item and pull it out, squealing when you see that it’s a tiny, cream-colored hamster plush. it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen in your whole goddamn life. 
and you are disappointed to find yourself thinking it bears a striking resemblance to its owner.
you stuff the little hamster back into the bag. as cute as he is, it’s not what you came here for. you gasp when you feel the cold leather-bound journal in your hand, pulling it out hurriedly and examining the cover.
you open the journal, flipping through the pages rashly until you locate an entry with today’s date at the top. it reads:
“if one is a vulture, it’s assumed they’re no good— despite all the research that they’re helpful to earth. does the finch know that if that vulture could, he’d hunt for a mirror and show it it’s worth? if that finch is a dove, there’d be something that would still keep it away from achieving true mirth. it’s the vultures, the bird cries before it understood: the vulture has always been a sign of rebirth. a dove, raven, vulture, or finch from the woods, the vultures will find it and double their search. but for someone who claims they feel misunderstood, it’s repulsive the lengths it would go to unearth... something that does not belong to that bird. seems the dove was a raven afterall.”
“pretty good, huh?” the sudden voice behind you makes you jump. “wrote it in, like, ten minutes after class. what can i say? i was inspired.”
you don’t turn around. your face is already on fire from how mortified you are. of course, you’d considered the possibility of being caught. but you hadn’t really realized the weight of that consequence until this moment.
“actually, i think it might be even better than the original,” he continues, footsteps echoing against the tiled floors as he draws nearer. “i mean, you really should’ve thought to flesh out those vulture characters a bit. and you didn’t even consider looking up the well-known symbolism behind them.”
a hot breath fans across the back of your neck, causing you to shiver as a hand wraps around the leather-bound journal and pries it from yours.
“i have to admit, i didn’t really think you had it in you,” he says with a chuckle, fingers suddenly hooking into your waistband and turning you around to face him. he’s in his red and white soccer uniform, skin glistening from the practice meet he should be at right now. “but just in case, i wanted to be prepared. write you something worth reading.”
“h-how did you know?” you stutter quietly. “that i—”
“well, you weren’t exactly subtle, now were you?” hanbin smiles but the light doesn’t reach his eyes. “‘you should read your poem, hanbin. i’m sure it’s exciting with the big game coming up’. like you give a fuck about my poetry.”
that last sentence reminds you of what you thought you’d heard him mumble in class today: not like you’d listen to me anyway.
what was that about?
“aw, don’t get sad now that your plan didn’t go your way,” hanbin coos, lifting his hand to caress your cheek. “i thought it was kind of cute. i can forgive you for stealing, right? you just wanted my attention so badly that you had to play a bit dirty.”
you shake your head quickly. “no, it’s not like that! i swear i wasn’t trying to get your attention, i just—”
“well then, jesus fucking christ, what do i have to do to—,” hanbin snaps before promptly cutting himself off. there’s something in his eyes you’ve never seen before: desperation. 
a large hand wraps around your throat in an instant, shoving you up against a blue locker. the motion knocks the wind out of you and you find yourself gasping for air. your hand flies to remove his from around your neck, but he catches it in his free one and brings it gently back down to your side. 
“i told you in class that if you needed help calling off the vultures, you should ask me while you still can,” hanbin rasps, rubbing his thumb up the left side of your throat. “but you weren’t listening, dove. the gulper got first bite. the rippers tore you apart...”
you breathe shallowly, glancing from side to side for some route of escape.
“but now the king has landed,” he says, tongue flitting across his teeth. “and he’s fucking starving.”
you blink at him, lips parted in stupid shock. “i—... i honestly had no idea you knew so much about vultures.”
“THAT’S WHAT YOU TOOK FROM THAT ARE YOU KID—,” he yells, finger pads digging in tighter to the skin of your neck. his gaze falls to your lips, supple and pretty even in fear. he trails down to your shirt, a button-up front that seems to entice him. “take it off.”
“b-but—.”
“take it the fuck off, (y/n). you should know by now how this goes,” hanbin snarls, grabbing your hand and bringing it to the trail of buttons. you start to fiddle with them, but you have some trouble under the pressure of his gaze. “can’t even undo a button? hm? too fucking stupid, dove?”
you find yourself nodding against all odds.
“need binnie to do it for you?” he coos, smile lines illuminating his face again.
you just nod again. it seems to be what you do best.
hanbin unfastens the buttons one-handed and with ease. once your shirt is open, he tugs it to the side and exposes your chest. then, he sighs with dramatic disappointment. “seriously? that’s it? got me all excited to see how good you look under here and this is what you have to show?”
you look down at your incredibly normal and attractive upper body. you’d never really doubted the aesthetics of it before. should you have?
the humiliating comment causes a lump to form in your throat... and an embarrassingly intense ache to shoot through your heat. 
he tugs the center hem of your shirt, pulling the fabric further off your shoulders. “it’s a good thing the other guys didn’t see this. they’re far more superficial than me. you should be grateful you found a guy who can look past the disappointment. ”
hanbin’s free hand roams across your abdomen and chest, fingers ghosting sweetly against your skin until you let out the tiniest whimper.
“mm, i heard that,” he breathes with a smirk. “even though you never hear me. probably didn’t even fucking clock the first line in that stupid poem. but i hear you, dove. so let me give you what you want. all you have to do is ask.”
you gulp, softly responding, “w-want you to... touch me.”
“yeah?” hanbin affirms, finger trailing down your stomach.
you nod again, this time more assuredly under the guise of his encouraging smile. that is, until a harsh slap stings your cheek.
“well that wasn’t a fucking question, was it?” hanbin hisses, rubbing soothing circles into your cheek with his thumb. “you’re in an advanced poetry class and you don’t even know how to form an interrogative sentence? just must be doodling all the time, huh? about all the boys who’ve made a mess of you this week? like the dumb little slut you are.”
hanbin’s free hand finds it’s way into your jeans, fingers brushing over your clothed core before pulling it out again. you gasp when you see his fingers already covered in your arousal.
his eyes darken as he undoes the button clasp and zipper of your pants, shoving your underwear to the side with his fingers. he forces your legs a bit farther apart before stuffing a finger inside of you, causing you to cry out. 
“oh, dove, why would i wanna put my cock in here, hm? so desperate, i could slip right in,” hanbin says with another sigh of disappointment. “did the other guys really make such a whore of you?”
another bout of worry clouds your mind. was that true? was matthew right? you thought he was just being a red-pilled pig, but... had you somehow been physically tainted from the events of this week?
“so fucking lucky, dove,” hanbin whispers, removing his hand from your center and taking one of yours. he brings it down the front of his athletic shorts and then wraps it around his impossibly hard length. you look up at him, wide-eyed. “where every other man would see damaged goods, i see prime real estate.”
“what—”
“gonna fuck you now, m’kay?” hanbin interjects, pulling his shorts down and exposing himself to you. you hadn’t really seen the other boys up close or at all like this. hanbin’s cock is pretty— long with just a few visible veins and a pink head that’s leaking a bit of pre-cum. it makes your mouth water. maybe you are a dumb slut.
maybe you like it like that.
or maybe it’s just hanbin’s large hand covering your throat, pressing at the sides both tenderly and persistently that’s making you feel a bit high. he brings himself to your entrance, spitting in his hand and covering his length as he lines up the tip. he’s about to push himself inside of you, when he suddenly freezes.
“you want me to, right?” hanbin asks, tone suddenly much softer than it was before. his eyes are locked with yours, holding you there with him against the wall of lockers. “you want me inside you? just me. not those other guys? not junseo hyung-nim or—”
BEEEEEEEEEP. BRRANG. BRRANG. BRRANG. BEEEEEEEE....
a fire alarm rips through the locker room, loud and annoying as ever. you try to jump out of hanbin’s grasp, but his hands stay fixed around you. 
“let me... let me go!” you assert, hitting his chest with your palm. the pressure on your neck that felt so good just a few moments ago is now filling you with fear, “are you trying to kill me or something!?”
his brow raises slightly, as if he only just noticed the alarm. his grip loosens and you take the opportunity to scramble away from him, frantically zipping up your jeans. 
“of course i’m not,” he replies dejectedly, re-situating his shorts before huffing, “like you have a body worth going to jail for.”
“oh, shut up,” you retort, rolling your eyes as you race to re-button your shirt. “this is all YOUR fault. whatever’s going on this week, i know you’re behind it. you’ve run out of ideas to keep me small. but i’m not small. in fact, i’m a much bigger person than you are! so... i’m sorry for whatever i did that made you hate me so much in the first place. now, please, let’s get out of here.”
you start to run down the aisle of lockers towards the exit door, but a lack of footsteps behind you causes you to stop and turn back.
“come on,” you urge as hanbin continues to stand in place and stare at you, unmoving. it might be the most infuriating thing he’s done all day. “oh, fucking burn then.”
the tangible anger in your voice startles both of you. hanbin blinks quickly back at you, wide-eyed as if you’ve just slapped him across the face. whoever gave him the right to feel that way is sorely mistaken. you turn back around, throwing over your shoulder:
“are there birds worse than vultures?”
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dilfspitdrinker · 10 months
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Let The Light In | Joel Miller x reader
Description: You’ve been babysitting Joel Miller’s daughter all summer. No matter now much you try to deny it, you know you’re into him. But it’s just a little crush that you thought could never be reciprocated, until one fateful phone call. The shift between you two is irresistible, and you’re in for more than you ever anticipated. A/N: I love me some good tension and two characters who clearly want each other but constantly wallow in self doubt and completely misread each other lmao (way more of that in next chapter) Masterlist
Chapter 3
On Monday, you could hardly focus in your classes, anxiously watching the hours go by. Thankfully, your last class was dismissed early, and you wasted no time in rushing back to your apartment. Your place was hardly more than a one-bed, one-bath, and open kitchen, but with the extra time you could clean up a bit. Do the dishes, fold some laundry, wipe down the countertops. Once those chores were completed, you changed into a tank top and shorts, telling yourself that it’s because it’s hot today, not because Joel would be here any minute now. You even bothered to sweep the notebooks and pens scattered on your desk into a drawer, as if he would be in your bedroom or care at all.
You jolted when there was a knock at the door. You quickly checked yourself in the mirror, ignoring how ridiculous that was, and then hurried over to the door, straightening the rug on your way.
You opened it up and immediately met Joel’s eyes, somehow looking more handsome than ever before. He looked like he’d just gotten done with some particularly strenuous labor, there was a light sheen on his forehead, and his skin looked a bit more bronzed. You greeted him with your best smile and a cheery, “Hi!”
“Hey you,” he grinned, forcing himself to not let his gaze drift. He’d seen you in shorts plenty of times – the Texas heat after all – but he’d never seen this particular pair. Cut off at the perfect length, in his opinion. He hardly heard what you said as he followed you into the kitchen, having to rip his gaze away from the sway of your hips. Focus.
You demonstrated the issue with the sink, “So yeah, it comes out really weak, see? Pain in the ass when I’m trying to do anything fast.”
He set his toolbox on the counter, “Let’s see what we’re workin’ with here.”
As he started, you pretended to pay attention to what he was doing, but that was just a ploy to stare at his hands and arms. You leaned against the counter, eyes glazing over a bit as you thought about how those hands could grab you.
Normally, being watched while doing a job didn’t make him nervous, but somehow you had him more wound up than any overly-involved client.
“How was class?” he asked, hoping some small talk would ease the tension.
“It was alright. Chemistry isn’t the easiest subject for me.”
“Just the fact that you got into college makes you twice as smart as me.”
“Oh come on, that’s not true.”
“You get a lot further in life if you have brains.”
Your eyes flickered between his fingers and his concentrated face. “It’s important to be good with your hands, too.”
He tilted his head to glance at you. So much for easing any tension.
His eyes looked so tantalizing, wide but with a certain coyness behind them. Everything else seemed to fade, like you could just melt into his gaze. Then he held something in front of you, and you had to force your eyes refocus. Right, the sink, he’s here to fix the sink. And he’s doing exactly that while you’re busy ogling.
“You could clean it, but with the state of this one, you’re better off just replacin’ it,” he fished out an identical but shinier part from his toolbox.
“Is that gonna cost me extra?”
“This is complementary.” He returned to his task, replacing that thingy you were too dazed to pay attention to.
You rolled your eyes, pushing yourself up to sit on the counter. “By the way, did I get promoted or something? What’s with the pay raise?” Last night when you checked your bank account you saw that Joel had transferred you more than your usual babysitting rate.
“Just thought you deserved it,” he smirked.
“That’s really not necessary.”
“Knew you’d say that,” he murmured. “Woulda paid you more if I could,” he added, just to get a rise out of you.
“You don’t have to pay me to spend time with you,” you remarked, forgetting that he actually paid you for spending time with Sarah.
But he played along, “You’d hang around an old man for free?”
He could hear the smirk in your voice, “Only if it’s you,” he rocked when you lightly pushed his shoulder, “and you’re not old.”
He let out a deep laugh, then stepped back from the sink. “Looks like that should do it. You let me know if it starts acting up again.”
“Will do,” you said, masking your disappointment at his efficiency.
“Anything else ‘round here that needs fixing?”
“Ummm…” you scanned the area, trying to think of any random annoyance he could work on just to keep him here longer. “This cabinet is kinda squeaky,” you pointed to the one right next to your head.
“Can’t have that,” he sidled up to you, his hip brushing your knee.
He worked leisurely, and your eyes raked over him, no longer caring about being obvious. He could practically feel your gaze burning his skin.
You spoke up, “But seriously, how much do I owe you for this?”
“You don’t have to pay me to spend time with you,” he echoed your words from earlier, then added, “or come up with odd jobs.”
“Hey, I just mentioned the issues, you’re the one who offered to help. Sounds like you’re looking for excuses.”
He smirked, eyeing you up and down. “Maybe I am,” he rested his large hand on your bare thigh. Your breath hitched.
A sharp knock at the door startled you.
You hopped off the counter, sharing a look with Joel. He stayed back while you opened the door, and to your displeasure, it was the guy from Saturday night’s party.
You couldn’t even offer a fake pleasantry before he demanded, “Where have you been?”
“Why do you need to know?” you retorted.
“Why’d you ditch me at the party?”
“Because I got bored,” you began closing the door in his face, but he pushed to keep it open.
“You weren’t home that night, or yesterday.”
“No I wasn’t. And don’t come back here.”
He raised his voice, “I’m just checking on you-“
“Didn’t ask you to.”
“Damn bitch, then I won’t!” he seethed, but then his face dropped.
You could feel Joel’s presence just over your shoulder.
His voice was a deep rumble, a tone you’d never heard out of him before, “Get out and don’t come back.”
The guy’s eyes flitted to yours, “Who the fuck is this?”
“None of your business,” you snapped. Joel reached around you, and together you slammed the door shut.
After a moment of silence, you turned and leaned against the door, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Sorry about that,” you muttered, but that barely began to cover it. That was horribly embarrassing.
“Not your fault, darlin’,” Joel said softly.
You looked up at his face, but avoided eye contact. His hand was still planted on the door at your side.
“It’s a good thing I stayed at your place the other night,” you said quietly, matching his volume.
He nodded, eyes scanning your whole face.
Realizing your proximity, the space between you felt electrified, and you ached to lean in and close it.
Carefully, as if to not startle you, he moved his hand that was on the door, and held the side of your face. You gratefully leaned into his palm, letting your eyes fall closed. His skin was calloused but his touch was soft.
You let out a breathy laugh, “See? I don’t have the best luck with boys.”
He quirked an eyebrow, “What’d I tell you? Boys will only waste your time.” He hesitated, savoring the serenity on your face before he was sure to ruin it, “Maybe you do need a man.”
Over the pounding of your heart you barely heard yourself say, “A man like you?”
“If that’s what you want,” he breathed.
You opened your eyes to look directly into his, an air of boldness behind your expression, “It is.”
As your gaze fell to his lips, his hand shifted back from your cheek to cradle more of your neck. You drew closer to each other, magnetized. He could practically taste your soft breath. This could be a horrible mistake, and you both knew it, but you each selfishly shoved those anxieties down. You just needed this so bad, you swore just one kiss from this man could satisfy every need. Your heart was now thundering in your chest as the inches between you shrunk.
And finally – god, finally – your lips met his, and you felt like you might burst with emotion. It was a long, steady kiss, but so soft, you could sense his apprehension. You weren’t about to let this moment get cut short, so when he began pulling away, you were already leaning in again. That eagerness might’ve been the sign he way looking for, because this time he wasn’t so shy. He deepened the kiss, and you were so quickly losing yourself in him. The only thing grounding you was his hand still holding your face, and the added warmth of his other hand curling around your waist. He pressed you up against him and you clutched his t-shirt.
You were begging for this moment to never end, because whatever came after would be complicated. He began pulling away again, and again you drew him back in. He smiled against your lips. “Relax baby,” he murmured, “I’m not goin’ anywhere.”
You looked up at him through your eyelashes, and it made him wonder how he had ever resisted you before.
This time he initiated the kiss, and with more intention. He let you lead before because he had to be sure this was what you wanted. With the way you didn’t even want your lips to separate, safe to say it was. He kissed you tenderly, swiping his tongue across your bottom lip. Your soul practically left your body. You realized every kiss before Joel was an extremely mediocre experience.
And it was like he read your mind, his voice deliciously smooth and low, “How was that, hm? Better than those stupid boys you’ve been hanging around all summer?”
You’d been on a handful of dates in the past few months, none of which amounted to anything. Occasionally you’d mention an embarrassing or sour moment from them when Joel asked about your weekend. You didn’t think he’d remember. And Joel himself was finally admitting to every thought he’d repressed for months now. These fucking idiot boys didn’t know anything. Didn’t know how to treat you right, didn’t care about your comfort, didn’t want to make the effort. You were settling for less because you didn’t know what it’s like to be taken care of by a real man. He swore he’d show you if you let him.
He hummed again and you finally responded with a nod, eyes locked with his. No one’s ever made you feel like this, no crush has ever driven you this crazy, no kiss has ever given you goosebumps like this.
“That’s right baby, I know,” he stroked your cheek with his thumb before pulling you in for another sweet kiss. You were surprised your knees weren’t buckling at that.
You separated enough to tell him, “Yeah, I’m never bothering with boys again.”
“Ruined ‘em for you, did I?”
You giggled softly, and your cheeks were a rosy tint, and you were so precious it hurt him.
He tucked you under his chin, your nose pressed against his neck. You breathed deeply, logging his scent. You resisted the urge to taste his skin.
He held you for a minute, thumb rubbing circles on your hip. 
“I gotta pick up Sarah from school,” he said, untangling his fingers from your hair.
You nodded wordlessly, arms dropping to your sides. That was it then, fantasy fulfilled, moment over. Who knew when you’d do this again, if ever. He would probably want to forget about the whole thing as soon as he’s out the door.
The time had honestly slipped his mind, and he did have to go, but he didn’t want to just leave you hanging. He lifted your chin so you’d look at him, “I’ll call you later, okay?”
“Okay,” you gave him a small smile.
Moments later, you stood in your apartment alone, the space feeling impossibly empty.
Chapter 4
Masterlist
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momodita · 6 days
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snapshots. [—hirako shinji]
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TAGS / WARNINGS: gender neutral reader, comfort,       reader does not like aizen (lmao), light angst WC: 1,000 NOTE: shinji u are everything to me...
✗ MINORS / AGELESS / BLANK BLOGS DNI.
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“Somethin’ interesting up there?”
It is not an insignificant thing for another division’s captain to invite another squad’s subordinate to their quarters. But Shinji was never one for convention and has even less love for etiquette.
“Say, don’t you think it’s time to change out the tatami?” you ask instead of acknowledging his question.
Your back is to him, crouched in a corner of the room—staring at the ceiling. He was penning some kind of letter to Hiyori up until a couple minutes ago, humming to himself every few brush strokes; probably imagining her reactions to the stupid jokes he’s undoubtedly including.
“The time to spring clean has long since passed, ya know,” he drawls. Your head bends. Index finger scratching at a frayed edge, coaxing out the light click and snap of it. Loud in the oppressive quiet of midnight.
“When was the last time these were replaced?” you ask. “They're all discolored and patchy. And look—it’s coming apart.” You flick up a broken thread.
“Don’t pull it apart!” Shinji’s protest falls on deaf ears.
“I bet there’s a bunch of dirt trapped under here, too. I’ve never seen you clean it once.”
“Aizen probably had it done when he was captain.” Shinji waves a hand.
Your lips purse. You pierce a fingernail into the woven mat, testing its durability. There’s no doubt Aizen Sousuke had indeed done some upkeep of this room. You’d once walked by while looking for Hinamori and had taken it upon yourself to peek in—just to see.
Aizen was out working, of course. But his presence was unmistakable in the neatly arranged bookshelves, the futon he kept plump and folded, the desk, the tea set. All of it so neat. Sterile. It was like Shinji had never even lived there at all.
“Well, now you can get it replaced to celebrate your reinstatement,” you say, trying to sound casual around the plucking snap of another ripping thread. “They get musty during the summer.”
“Are ya sayin’ I stink?” he lilts. “There’s better things for us to do than fuss over the floors.” He tosses a crumpled piece of paper at you. It bounces off your shoulder. “And stop wreckin’ the tatami—I really will have to get them replaced.”
“Captain Kuchiki has someone do his—I hear they’re good. Efficient. He probably wouldn’t mind passing their name along—y’could have it done in like, three days tops.”
A pause. Then, Shinji sighs. His footsteps are soft and rhythmic as he crosses the room to slide the shoji doors open. A chill crawls inside. You shiver as it caresses up your uniform.
The Seireitei is at its best under moonlight, when the barracks are quiet and the only chatter is from the cicadas.
But Shinji, at least, is suited for its warm afternoons, when the sun is at its highest and it brings out the color of his hair.
(This insight strikes a familiar memory you keep of him: decades ago, before his disappearance, you would catch him under cloudless summer skies, lounging on the roofs. Perched for friendly, passing small talk; or perhaps to strike one of Hiyori’s many easy nerves. He’d tilt his head to talk to you and the light would catch that sheet of hair, illuminating it into golden strands.
And you, caught by the tempting shape of his profile, would always be coaxed to join. Sitting less than a sword’s length apart, he’d no idea of the longing brewing in your chest—so potent it knocked against each of your ribs.
When you spoke, you wondered if he saw it pouring out of your mouth in vapors like you did; if he was keen enough to spot the lift of your cheeks as you smiled away from him.)
“Something’s on yer mind,” he says, taking a seat beside you. “Don’t even think of hidin’ it from me, either. Got it?”
Much has changed since his disappearance. Not all of it good. You weigh the truth against a white lie. Then settle for something in between.
“Nothing really,” you mumble, drawing your arms across your chest. An absence of birdsong makes you that much more aware of your breath. “Just thinking ahead.”
“Will I have to replace them for the New Year, too?” he jests, leaning back on his hands.
The nostalgia of his posturing and banter stirs an acute yearning in your chest. Dry air stings your sinuses. Moistens your eyes. You think of life in Seireitei before everything. Before rising the ranks. Before Shinji cut his hair. Before Aizen Sousuke.
Before Aizen, you and Shinji would enjoy tea together. Or talk. Or admire the gardens. Before Aizen, you’d stare and stare at Shinji to take your fill of him—to memorize the ugly scrunch of his face as he squinted and the tiny lines by his eyes when he laughed.
“I want every trace of him gone,” you whisper finally, face buried. “I don’t want even a single piece of him left behind. I don’t want to remember him wearing your haori, or sleeping on the same futon, or using your brushes.” The brushes you gifted Shinji to celebrate his promotion. “It makes me sick just thinking about it.” From the specks of dirt to the air in that room, Aizen lingers everywhere he shouldn’t.
Shinji’s gaze is a heavy entity. You feel it on your shoulders—his quips withheld as he considers your words.
“I never took ya for the sentimental type.”
You huff an agitated noise. “It’s revenge. Don’t confuse them. ”
“Revenge for me?” Shinji asks, sounding infuriatingly gleeful.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” you scoff, nape prickling—caught. “Revenge for deceiving everyone.” Shinji merely hums. “You had your chance—Hinamori-chan deserves a turn to throttle him.” To that, Shinji doesn’t respond. But what is there to say? The wretched ghosts of your past bend to no one.
“Idiot,” he chides, achingly soft, “there’s nothin’ to worry about.”
(The tatami is replaced by the following week.)
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matchadobo · 1 year
Text
KIDD; eustass kidd as a college student
summary: my headcanons of kidd as a college student in the modern world. no dfs here. part two here tw: afab!reader, nothing sussy here dw
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* studies metallurgy or mechanical engineering
* insanely good at physics and chemistry 🫦
* but very emotionally and people dumb
* would wear graphic tees with rolled sleeves, ripped jeans, ankle boots
* eyeliner and lipstick on AT ALL TIMES
* is always late to class
* would be an overachiver
* makes every little thing a competition
* however, not an active student. he's just active when he wants to speak up about something he knows
* the typa student who does last minute reviews before exams and/or quizzes yet still manage to get a high mark
* lives in dorms with the other kidd pirates
* always have boys' nights where they just watch horror and scare each other, play games, or just get drunk
* not active in extracurriculars, he couldn't care less (unless it's related to his course or he's interested abt something it offers)
* know him as "that one hot redhead who always has a frown in his face and always gets into fights with the professors"
* would always banter with profs; not to disrespect them, but he's smart enough to butt heads with the professors. although his intention is to purely state what he knows is right, he always ends up disrespecting them bc of his language and attitude and gets demerits lmao
* kidd as a groupmate is a pain in the ass; he never replies and only does when he feels like it—which is rarer than rare. he replies to comply on the day before the deadline 🤬
* whenever there's debates, he's your man. mans got no filter and actually say stuff that no one wants to (e.g. controversies like church vs state, gray areas, taboos, gov't corruption, etc.), but only with a foul language
* submits tasks late 😫
* his handwriting is like this. he don't care abt pen width, brand, and type
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* would visit nightclubs and bars seldomly, have hook ups and flings here and there but nothing was serious enough for him to go crazy for. he'd be with them one night max, he's the type of guy to leave afterwards 😭
his relationship with you:
* if you were just a blockmate he'd never even bat an eye at you let alone know you exist
- unless you caught his eye bc of your attractiveness physically or mentally
- if you haven't done anything remarkable to catch his attention, you're good as a rock to him
* if you're friends with him and is part of his circle:
- kidd being friends with you means that he can not only tolerate you but you can also measure up to and endure his feistyness
- that is tantamount to him being interested with you
- whenever a topic is blurry to you, he'd call you "dumb, birdbrain, shit for brains, etc" each time he explains and you still don't understand. but he would always accurately and patiently piece it out for you step by step, there's just some harshness that comes with it
- would always treat you to his and yours' favorite place after school whenever he sees you tired and bummed out after classes. would always tell you that "cmon i'll feed you some real fuckin' food, better than those ugly ass instant noodles you always have at your dorms." secretly loves seeing you eat and be full after meals
- each time your circle goes out, he'd always be seated next to you, is always close to you, or keeps an eye on you saying "you'll kill yourself with your dumb ass if i don't keep an eye on you." but that's just an excuse, cuz he likes looking at you
- study dates! well, he refuses to call them dates; just like how he refuses his feelings towards you. but would always insist on regularly doing this
> he doesn't really need the study dates, he's smart enough to excel on his own. he just wants an excuse to spend time with you, be close to you, teach you, make you laugh, and eat with you
- would he confess? he would, drunk. it'd start when you ask him to stop since he had too much to drink, he'll cup your face and tell you with flushed cheeks as his breath stinks from alcohol, he'll proclaim how much he adores you and how cute you are. he'll regret it in the morning and would avoid you for days.
- when you two get together, you two are inseparable. pda is clear as day. he's clingy af, would always link arms with you during lectures, rubbing circles on your soft skin. would let you put your thighs over his lap and stroke them fondly. when you put your head down during class as a result from weariness, his fingers with red-lacquered nails combs through your hair to soothe you. would always have an arm around you, whether above your shoulder or waist.
- his go to destressing activity is game/movie night with you and his circle
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dreamy sighs 0~0
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solunstell · 5 months
Text
List of bsd headcanons
Dazai:
Has bpd. A lot of his traits remind me of my friends with it
He some kind of trans. Nonbinary. Transfem. Transmasc. Idk he's megender lmao
He's described as appearing very youthful in the first two light novels. I imagine that once the events of the main timeline start picking up though, with all the time stopping or slowing abilities that *dont affect him*, he actually ages faster than the other characters. I draw current dazai with small wrinkles, which also hints at stress and stuff
Also, I imagine current dazai getting tanner as he works in the light, as well as getting more prominent freckles.
Round/doe eyes because that is part of his appearance in my opinion. Seeming unsuspecting and innocent, especially during his mafia days
Bad eyesight in his right eye from being under the bandages for so long. Saw this headcanon and loved it
Similarly, beastzai has bad vision in general
I always call No Longer Human an anti-ability in my head, fun fact
He loves to touch other people. Not a fan of being touched by others unless asked
I draw him with red eyes in color, and usually black eyes in ink (inconsistent artstyle my beloved)
Aroace spectrum
heavy sleeper. Very
Chuuya
FRECKLES and tan from sheep days
He likes to be close to other people more than actually touching. Presence over contact
That shade of eyes that changes colors in the light (but I use a grey base lol)
Also some sort of trans, but in a different way than dazai
Brownish red hair. Not blazing, not just brown
That man is AUTISTIC
One time instinctively kicked a friend with his ability active, expecting them to dodge cuz he's used to dazai easily dodging. They did, but they were SO CLOSE to getting hit. Imagine a confused face like wtf why you try to kick me
Light sleeper, but every now and then sleeps like he just learned how to close his eyes
A lot of his jokes go over people's heads because they expect him to be serious and his voice just doesn't change between serious and not serious
Ranpo
Autism plus adhd ftw
Aroace spectrum
Poe
He/they vibes
Anxiety
Gay af
I can 100% see him being into knitting. Imagine the guide plus ranpo all in matching sweaters
Loves baking. Sooooo bad at it
Lucy
Bi (with a lean towards girlies) she/it
VERY good at baking
But she won't share :(
Atsushi
Anxiety, so much anxiety
Aroace spectrum vibes
Very easily idolizes people and then gets surprised when they actually like being around him
Akutagawa
Aroace spectrum
Autism cuz he is so mecore sometimes
Very trans vibes from me
(I like to imagine him having tourettes cuz I have tourettes and I am Not projecting)
Atsushi (special kitty hearing) and jouno being the only ones who can hear some of his tics. He will be horrified that anyone notices them
Wait no actually I'm gonna incorporate that into my belief system. That's canon now
Mori
Genuinely cares about a lot of his workers, but not all of them
He gives great bonuses for birthdays
He absolutely loves vtubers if bsd were in a modern setting. Rip mori. He'd have also loved vocaloid lmao
Ozaki
Masc energy. Fem energy. Ooh I can see ozaki with any pronouns and identity
Kinda person to accidently either overpack or underpack. Always has painkillers, never has a pen
Ridiculous memory. Incredible gift giver. Would get someone something months or years after overhearing them say they wanted something once
"Whyd you get me a hairdryer?"
"You said you needed one. I saw it and thought of you."
"...that was months ago. I got a hairdryer already."
"..." *takes hairdryer back* "sorry wrong person. I don't have my contacts in my bad"
She has perfect vision
Kunikida
Trans vibes. In any and every direction
Adhd af
Will always conveniently have room in his schedule when Aya wants to go do something and needs someone to go with her. No, he's TOTALLY not frantically writing and erasing things, get your glasses updated
You can usually count on him to continue the bit cuz he won't realize there is a bit occurring
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aurumacadicus · 1 year
Note
Crime writer Tony actual assassin bucky,
I am so bad at crime rest in pieces Tony lmao.
Tony sort of... falls into writing accidentally. Rhodey joins a book club in college and Tony joins with him because he's codependent and after the first three books, they read a frankly abysmal adaption of the Black Dahlia murder. Unfortunately, Tony is the best at working out of spite, so as soon as 'man, even I could write a better and more respectful novel than this,' it just sort of... happens. Rhodey is the first person he shows, nervous and antsy. Rhodey has the best poker face Tony's ever seen, even better than Howard and Obie's. He had no idea what Rhodey thinks of it. Finally, Rhodey looks up at him, and he says, "This was really good, but it could be better. I'm giving it to the book club." Tony wails in dismay because he's a perfectionist when it comes to showing things off, but Rhodey drags him to book club kicking and screaming, because they're mostly English majors and they'll have more insight than he does. The book club rips it to shreds, but they tell him exactly why, and his second draft barely has any red marks on it at all when they read it. While Tony's in college, he publishes his novels under a pen name, and his book club are his editors. Once he graduates, he starts publishing under his own name, with part of the proceeds going into two non-profits--a book club and a writers workshop for underprivileged youth.
Bucky's descent into serial killing is not an accident at all. One of his sisters is beaten almost to death by her boyfriend, and when the guy only gets a slap on the wrist by the courts because it's his first offense, Bucky makes him disappear. The only other person who knows is Steve, mostly because they're so close he would have found out anyway. Luckily, the most Steve ever says about it is, "Don't tell me anything. I'm a bad liar." He figures part of it is because Steve had been with him when they'd found his sister bleeding and unconscious on her apartment floor. He'd seen Steve's jaw clench at the hearing when the guy was let off on probation. His rage that the system was failing someone who had almost been murdered by an intimate partner. Steve had decided to throw himself into getting laws changed, harsher sentences. It was slow going. It was probably the only reason he turned a blind eye when Bucky decided to take a more... hands on approach.
Tony and Bucky, miraculously, meet when Bucky sneaks into his apartment. Or, well, "meet." Tiberius had just been let off assault charges simply because he was rich, and Tony hadn't gotten a chance to change the locks because he was in the hospital recovering from being strangled. Bucky had meant to sneak in and kill Tiberius while Tony was still at the hospital, so he'd have an alibi. But apparently Tony had signed out of the hospital against medical advice to avoid the press, and Bucky had snuck into his apartment to find Tiberius backhanding him to the ground. So he simply stepped further into the apartment and snapped Tiberius's neck. Clean. Efficient. Fast enough that Tony, dazed and bleeding from a head wound again, wouldn't realize it. "Let's get you cleaned up," Bucky says gently, helping Tony to his feet. "But Tiberius--" Tony starts, lip bleeding as well. "He's sleeping," Bucky assures him, and helps Tony to the bathroom to clean him up. Calls a friend to come sit with him because he's adamant he's not going to the hospital. Gets him tucked onto the couch with a milkshake and an old sci-fi movie in the background. Grabs Tiberius by the scruff to drag him out. "So dinner? Tomorrow? With me?" Tony slurs, blinking doe eyes at him. "Sure," Bucky agrees, good-natured, and expects to never see him again.
"So," Tony says, tablet and stylus in hand. "What's the easiest way to kill somebody." "We are at my job," Bucky complains immediately, grabbing him by the arm to drag him over to the antique book section. "How did you find me?" "I'm Tony Stark," Tony says, and then, "Also I follow Steve on Instagram and there are pictures of you with him. I asked where you worked and he's a bad liar." "He really isn't, he just panics," Bucky says. He sighs, crossing his arms over his chest, and does not mention that the way Tony is checking out his biceps are not subtle. "Why do you follow Steve?" "I like the work he's doing to get more stringent laws for domestic violence," Tony tells him seriously, and Bucky throws his hands up in frustration. "Anyway. Do you wanna go get lunch?" "You watched me k--" Bucky begins, outraged, then swallows it back and takes a deep breath. He glances around to make sure they're still alone, then whispers, "You watched me kill your ex-boyfriend." "He was going to kill me," Tony says, shrugging. "The bar is on the floor." "Jesus Christ," Bucky moans, dragging his hands down his face.
Tony has the self-preservation of a gnat and keeps inviting Bucky out. Bucky is absolutely appalled. He's dangerous. Tony has seen him kill somebody. And he still wants to have dinner? "And raunchy sex that makes me blush when I remember it maybe," Tony offers, shrugging. "Tiberius didn't usually even get me to come." Somehow Bucky is not surprised and yet still incredibly offended on Tony's behalf. "Well, I'm pretty good in bed," he says mulishly, because it's not fair that Tony hasn't had a partner that cared about his pleasure in bed recently. And then somehow he gets locked down into a long-term relationship. He is absolutely stunned. "Tony's like that," Steve tells him, and then, "Actually I'm surprised this didn't happen sooner. Please tell Tony to stop telling me how good you are in bed." "You tell Tony to stop asking me to show him how to kill people for his books," Bucky retorts, and then they both stare at each other, stone faced, as they realize oh. So this is just what Tony's like then.
Bonus: Tony goes back to his old pen name so he can write self-published raunchy romance novels of a writer and his serial killer boyfriend. Bucky is mortified but also aroused. Tony coyly asks him what he'd do in the killer character's position in the bedroom and Bucky is FURIOUS that it gets him horny. It doesn't stop him from showing Tony, though.
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spicybylerpolls · 1 month
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Well, unknown hero agent man / pen symbolism anon, i hope you're reading this, cos you hit the nail on the head! this kind of symbolic storytelling is not only a fine art of cinema (being lost these days a little sadly, what with the whole netflix speedy turnover etc), but exactly what (good) films of the horror genre aim to do.
horror has long been a way to creatively tell 'normal' dramatic stories through subtext and symbolism. not sure if this is still a way around traditional censorship but im sure it began that way. films like the exorcist, the shining, rosemary's baby... all classics that are filled with subtext. its also an exciting way to talk about things that might seem trite or too bleak when portrayed as a 'straight' drama (this is the term meaning 'non-genre based' or 'non-musical' lmao). So you could say that ST is NOT straight, in more ways than one 😉
but much of this will go over casual viewers heads, so its finding the balance between making a story believable on the surface (another dimension exists! scary government men trying to kill us!) and subtextually (the UD as a metaphor for trauma/AIDS/closeted homosexuality/abuse etc) if viewers are clever enough to see/feel it. i say feel because much of storyviewing is instinctive instead of analytical.
so ST incorporates both - not just metaphorical, vague storytelling, but also real issues too. but it goes one step further, and actually has characters talk explicitly about reading deeper into stuff (murray's behind the curtain speech). it's a very meta show, even for a genre piece, which is why it astounds me that some people think it's not that deep lol. and some people think that only literature can be deep, but never tv or movies - which is an insult to anyone who has ever been passionate about cinema tbh. It's a statement that would probably rip the heart out of the duffers' chests and stomp on it. these guys are super nerds who have dedicated their adult lives to this passion project. as finn said, 'most people make it then just cash in - im so glad they still care'.
I'm sorry you don't feel comfortable talking about the beauty of this storytelling on your main. it really does surprise me that the fandom is so censorship obsessed because sexual metaphors have long existed in visual media, and especially in horror films. there used to be a long post about byler and a potential sex scene at lover's lake on here, but the user disappeared and the post went missing. it was about all the sexual imagery in ST, with a focus on byler in s4. i especially loved how they mentioned mike's introduction, where he was just in underwear: it is both appropriate for the setting, but also gets the audience used to him as a growing lad with a body and draws attention to those uncomfortable, potentially sexual aspects of being a teen. i mean, he was in tiny pants for god's sake. did we need to see that? why did we see it? etc etc
hilariously, they also referenced the always sunny in philadelphia scene where a character is in a therapist office talking about a pen being a dick. he then puts it in his mouth and chews the pen lmoao
i think you'd enjoy @therainscene's rod symbolism post too. I'm personally hoping for some explicit sex scenes with byler, because the show so far has arguably been telling that story metaphorically already for 4 seasons, and bringing it out of the subtext could be a storytelling device in itself. bringing byler's secrets into the light. after all, this is a period piece that aims to shed light on a bygone era. its not a propaganda piece that needs to remain coded; the reasons for staying secretive still exist for mike and will in the 80s, but times have changed since then for us as a global audience, and more importantly, the aspirational message has changed. what message would the duffs want to send to viewers that are still bigoted? clearly one of the beauty of homosexuality, seeing as will, our fav gay boy, has been the darling sympathetic victim of the show since s1e1. the show needs to remain true to both the 80s while also having a strong message for this decade in order for modern audiences to be able to gain something from watching this story; in order for there to be a reason the show exists at all.
so to answer your question, i had never picked up on the pen symbolism until now, but i immediately agree, not least because 1) it must have a meaning that connects to byler's conversation otherwise why does it just interrupt them with no reason? (from a storytelling pov), and 2) because of the always sunny scene lolllll
thanks for the discourse! if you stick around into s5, im sure we will be able to start discussing this on our mains. it'll be a new era and there might even be gifs/pics of byler to accompany our 'spicy' discourse haha!
Amazing/fascinating points! Thanks for adding to the discussion!
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broodingheroine · 2 months
Text
tmagp 9 thoughts
rolling with it........ idk transportation? hair rollers? I'm bad at guessing
pen scribbles :3
ONBOARDING PAPERWORK....... SAM STOP FILLING IT OUT WHAT ARE YOU DOING
refuse to give "it" the satisfaction of giving up. sam don't give it sentience.
IF ITS DELIBERATELY WEIRD DONT FILL IT OUT
negative emotions. no stop.
why zero to seven.
JUST WHY????
okay they're flirting now. not in front of my salad.
sam humming to himself lol
CHESTER
MAGNUS WHAT??????????????? STOP
"STATEMENT" FUCK OFFFFFF
artifact storage moment
haunted game sounds interesting though.
oooooo wait the dice are haunted........
it's giving the card game with death episode of tma
divination dice 👀
SCARS?
turning gambling into a horror story is so creative though.
nah I'd probably roll the dice to be honest with you
oh this dude was on the way to Becoming huh
oh this is definitely like the Death episode of tma
oh fuck not the snake eyes
lol end of that one final destination movie
INTERRUPTION?
DECLARED DEAD??????
first assignment
"I don't watch television" lena ur so hot
hm tv ppl.
TEDDY!!!
back in the crypt lmao
alice jealous moment???
teddy u sneak I love u
alice the lady doth protest too much
BIG FOOTS A GOOD LAY HAHAHAHA
NO. NO DO NOT GO. DO. NOT. GO.
SAM. SAMMMM NOOOOOO.
YOU HEARD A CASE FILE ABT A GUY GETTING HIS EYES PRESUMABLY RIPPED OUT AT THIS PLACE AND I DECIDE YEAHHHHH LETS FUCKING GOO[?????
alice. alice uve been adamantly against any kind of investigation this whole time and now ur just like. sure whatever??
I'm so stressed right now.
I have a bad feeling about allll of this.
so the mention of some big name TV guy is very reminiscent of web statements so I'm a little wary of that
I'm assuming that lena is blackmailing ppl? can't really think of a reason why some tv guy would actually be involved with anything Horrors related considering he'd be in the public eye pretty frequently.
unless he is and it's the guy who burned the hilltop charity shop down and the envelope is another job? but I doubt that
presumably lena is the one handing out "hits" now vs being handed them. maybe "killing" klaus is what got her the position?
I'm lowkey nervous abt teddy reappearing? what if it's true that you can quit but you always get drawn back? teddy is seemingly the only ex employee anyone has any contact with soooo
I LOVED the case file today. dice are cool as shit. wish I could remember the episode title of the tma ep with the card game to become death but alas.
also hey! even more evidence that fr3-d1 is listening instead of just recording. computer has sentience let's gooooo.
I don't want sam to go to the institute but also I really hope next ep we get to see the institute.
sam filling out the paperwork presumably for no reason 🤨 he's being compelled 🤨
overall I'm STRESSED right now
how are we doing folks
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tonberry-yoda · 1 year
Text
did i mention that hisoka is also bouncing around in my head?
Tastes Like Bubblegum - Hisoka Morow
word count - 396
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~~another short one with some mistakes in there probably lmao~~
WARNINGS: hisoka... so only a bit suggestive, but nothing crazy. not 18+ or anything
He tasted like bubblegum.
Was it cliche? Yes.
But god, something about it was the best part about him.
You could never forget that taste, either. The way he would run over to you out of the blue and place his lips on yours, his tongue just barely sliding over your lower lip. His long nails would always tangle their way in your hair and he would always whisper something highly suggestive in your ear before vanishing.
You hated him for that.
But you loved him for that too.
You almost forgot about Hisoka. You both decided to get your Hunter's licenses and move on. You used yours for good while Hisoka did whatever he wanted with his. You took classes, met other Hunters and businesses that could help you grow, and had articles written about you and your work.
Sometimes, on late nights, you would chew on the end of your pen and remember the magician; that menace of a man. The way he charmed you at the Hunters exam, whispering in your ear about how powerful you were. How he wanted to rip your heart out.
You would've let him too, that's the funny part.
You leaned back in your chair and breathed in the cold air coming in through your window. You would take that Hunters exam all over again if it meant you could spend just a few more hours with him.
You knew he was dangerous. You could sense it, even when you hadn't developed your nen. But honestly, you didn't really care. You were intrigued by him. You wanted to see how dangerous he really could be.
Curiosity killed the cat.
You wouldnt mind what it would do to you.
"Hard at work, are we?"
You were startled to hear another voice in your empty apartment, but eased when you knew who it was.
"Hisoka," you giggled. "How did you get past the door man?" You turned to him, his heels clicking as he stepped closer to you.
"I have my ways."
"Oh, I'm sure you do."
Hisoka chuckled and tipped your chin to look up at him. "You've been thinking about me." He tilted his head and brought his face closer to yours, your lips almost brushing against one another's.
"Maybe." You teased, pulling him by the shirt, his lips falling onto yours.
Yeah.
He still tasted like bubblegum.
~~~~~
hxh masterlist --- pinned post
@tonberry-yoda
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whynot-tryit · 10 months
Text
Angel of Small Death- Preview
John Price x Female! Reader
Warnings: Medical inaccuracies, I have no idea about anything that comes to health care lmao
--------------------------------------
“Any past surgeries I should know about Captain?” The tips of your fingers press into the skin right below his ears, feeling the tension underneath while you slowly make your way down his neck, dotting your fingers into his hair clad skin. 
“No.” You don’t know if its in your head but his reply almost comes out as a whisper, your fingers run back up his neck applying pressure directly under his jaw on both sides of his esophagus. You hesitate for a moment when you don’t feel the usual clump of cells that should be there. You spare a glance at his eyes, taking a second too long to remember the shade of blue you find yourself trying to jot down in your mind. “You sure about that?” Your voice sounds softer, closer to the whisper he seemed to have let out before.
You slowly remove your hands from Price’s head and reach for the pen in your scrub pocket and turn to write something in your manilla folder thats laying on the side table on your left. “I think I would remember going under the knife, love.” 
A small smile graces your lips while you finish writing your notes. “Well Captain, I’m sorry to break the news to you but you don’t have tonsils.” You try to keep a straight face looking at the man sitting on the medical wings cot, barley a foot away. Your knees brushing up against his. “What exactly does that mean?” You hear what sounds like a hesitation of concern laced in his voice and it almost makes you break the stoic look you’re trying to maintain. 
“Either someone drugged you and ripped them out of your throat in your sleep or you had them removed when you were a kid and you didn’t remember and no one ever bothered to check or write it down. Im gonna go with the ladder so you can sleep better at night.” You let out a little chuckle at your imaginative story to pull his leg. Before Price seems to catch onto your joke you ask a follow up question. “Do you smoke?” 
“Does that matter?” He looked like the type to smoke, maybe not exactly a cigarette but maybe a cigar, your eyes flash down to his hands and look at his fingers which are laid out on his knees. Yep, he looks like the type to smoke cigars. Your eyes come back up to meet his.
 “Cigars?” 
Price doesn’t have to answer your question, the look on his face alone answers for you. Before the words reach your ears you’re already back to writing some notes in the folder. Sparing a glance back at the man you notice how out of place he looks. His dark clothes stand out against the pristine whiteness of the blanket laid out on the medical bed, and the slightly off white colors of the walls, the freshly mopped shinny floors. You have the sudden urge to comfort him even though he’s not here for any actual type of medical treatment. 
You can see the questions brewing underneath his lips and behind his eyes. Turning your body back to face him, inching your stool a little closer til your knees are almost back to pressing against his. 
“If you got your tonsils removed as a child you have a slightly increased risk of upper respiratory infection and you smoking, even if it’s an occasional cigar increases that risk even more.” You try to show some sense of empathy through your eyes while they meet his. A sense of understanding seems to cross his face from your words and it causes a warm smile to find its way on your face. 
“Its not that big of a deal but since it’s now in my job description to make sure you and and your men are as healthy as can be I just want to make a note of it incase of anything.” 
“Alright, love.” 
The gruffness in his voice makes you fight back a shiver. “Do you not like doctors, Captain?” You don’t usually make small talk with patients but Laswell had persuaded John into accepting a team doctor for 141, so you would be working along side the man for a while and he doesn’t seem to fond of all the questions and bright lights. “Not exactly, just not fond of the medical wing itself.” You nod, “yeah I can agree with you on that, not exactly friendly.” John smiles, its small but something and you feel a tightness in your chest just from the sight of it. “Well since I’m your doctor now we can always just meet in your office instead of here, as long as I can just bring my supplies when needed.” 
Price doesn’t understand why you’re trying to be so understanding, so comforting. It’s strange, out of the ordinary for the man, especially in his line of work. His eyes rack your face, down to your hands where you’re fiddling with your fingers. “I’m here to help you Captain, thats it.” You can tell he’s thinking, this is one of your first interactions with your new co worker and he was a lot handsomer than most of your other coworkers let on so you’re trying your best but God damn this is getting on to be harder than you thought. 
“You gonna cook me dinner too, love?” He chuckles. You let a small laugh slip past your lips. “Ask Laswell to see if you can upgrade to the doctor deluxe package and maybe I will.” You’re enjoying this, and judging by Prices reaction he seems to be enjoying himself too. 
“Deluxe package?” 
“Yeah, cooked meals, back massages, the whole nine, Captain.”
“Sounds like a dream if you tell me, love.” 
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Pls let me know what you guys think, Im thinking of making this a multi chapter thing thats eventually smut but I haven’t written in a while so plssssssss comment,  let me know what you guys think. Excited to be back
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codecicle · 5 months
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Hiii for no particular reason in particular. Particularly. I was wondering if u had any other codeflippa hcs as u r the #1 codeflippa fan
HELLO HI YES HELLO IS THIS THING ON?? [tapping on microphone] HELLOOOOOO oh im yelling okay sorry sorry,,, sweet yeagh I've always got a few!!
codeflippa doesn't really communicate through normal talking, the same way juanaflippa was selectively mute and mainly communicates through a notebook (that mariana made with her. mariana and flippa went out to kill some cows for leather and on their trip over to foolish's house they stole some sugar cane to make paper and mariana binded it all together with a custom made pen and patches on the front just for flippa. it now sits in front of her grave/statue at mariana's house) codeflippa communicates through tts or typing. she tried to communicate through a notebook charlie gave her when she first showed up at the house, but she struggled because the code on her arms would glitch and make her shake too much to write legibly so charlie hacked his communicator (the qsmp global chat LMAO) and instead of her sending messages to the server, she could type her words and have them read outloud to whoever needs to hear it. she can talk, but just prefers not to for comfort.
juanaflippa also could talk but preferred not to for the same reasons, but she used to make dragon noises as a stim whenever she was happy ^_^ she chirped and purred and clicked whenever she wanted. most of the time it was really really quiet, her main stims being completely silent. she made tons of noise, but it was all relatively quiter. codeflippa does these same stims, but the code has really obviously spread to her tongue and she beeps and makes janky, loud dial-up noises and twitches as stims much more than juanaflippa. codeflippa's chirps sound corrupted, nearly like she's in pain. Charlie used to mimic flippas stim noises (kinda like how you try to perfectly match the way a cat meows at you) and once codeflippa came around it became much more difficult to do accurately. he tried to convince himself once the code spread up to his tongue that the reason his voice sounded corrupted was because he's finally gotten so good at mimicking codeflippa's stims, but he was always confused if it hurt this much for her or if his vocal chords just weren't used to it. he chalked it up to him not being used to it yet, and as the code infection got worse through his whole body the pain went away! instead of sharp pain, it was just pins and needles whenever he mimicked the way she sounded ^_^
i also think juanaflippa's original clothes were made by charlie at first, but when mariana was taking care of her he would rip apart his own clothes that he grew out of and dye the fabrics new colors and sew them back together for juanaflippa. she had sensory issues with the way most of the free federation clothes fit and felt on her scales and skin, AND she needed to have a custom hole in the skirts for her tail, so mariana would sew his old worn down (and very very comfortable/comforting to flippa) clothes into new skirts or shirts for her. after flippa died, charlie wanted that bonding experience and criticized mariana for never teaching him so he could help. roier set both of them up so mariana was able to teach charlie and charlie hated it the whole time, but it meant he was able to see his bitch (pretty) fucking wife for a bit longer to take away the pain of their isolation after flippas death. charlie never thought he would need that skill ever again, until codeflippa showed up and needed custom made clothes because her tail didn't work with most skirts, and her code gave her intense sensory issues with most pants and shirts charlie stole from the federation for her. he ripped up his fabrics and dyed them to makes skirts for her, and just like flippa she wanted to wear one of his oversized "so yeah, I'm a gamer" shirts for comfort instead of her own. charlie could never say no to her, so instead of making her a custom one just for her, he found his favorite of those shirts (he has like 20 like a cartoon character LMAOOO) and gave it to her after he had painted over the hearts on the shirt so they had pieces of code on them (he did the same to all the shirts so they would match and she wouldn't feel alone)
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