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wlykjh · 21 days

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how to write a love song

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

masterlist

taro has been heavy on my mind for the last 24 hours and i’ve always wanted to write a fake dating fic so here we are

summary: you have been a solo idol under SM for years now. unfortunately, you’ve seen a decline in your popularity in the last year. sm’s newest boy group, riize, on the other hand, is blowing up in korea and overseas. in an attempt to generate buzz around your upcoming album, your company sets you up in a PR relationship with riize’s shotaro. (not proofread)

date: 04/07/24

scenario themes: fake dating, idol!au, lowkey grumpy x sunshine lmao

idol: osaki shotaro of riize

concept: fluff, angst-ish

warnings: swearing

word count: 5.3k

"fucking hell." you curse to yourself, alone in your private studio. you were looking at the sales for your last mini album. this was the lowest number you've seen since your debut. flopping onto a chair, you opened up youtube to check your streams, then spotify, then naver, and so on and so forth.

you were beginning to become obsessive, looking to numbers for validation. you put your phone down, sighing. looking up at the wall in front of you, you were greeted with your debut poster.

you were so young, so passionate. you didn't care about streams or sales, you just wanted to share your art with the world. feeling a bit ungrateful, you began to gaslight yourself into feeling better: it's not like the figures were that low, and many artists would kill to have half of what you're complaining about.

it didn't work. you felt even more like shit. somewhere along the way you fell in love with stardom. you became used to high-end brand endorsements, sold-out stadiums, and paparazzi everywhere you go. life has changed a lot for you in the last year.

you got so caught up in everything that you haven't been able to produce as much music. and if you're being honest, the only music you have put out hasn't exactly been your best work.

you initially stood out since you were an idol who didn't dance or put on flashy performances but instead wrote and composed captivating songs with meaningful lyrics. this attracted the attention of a nation, and later on, you developed a global fanbase. a fanbase that is currently fighting for their lives to defend your shitty mini-album.

somewhere along the way, you lost your spark. your lyrics which used to be about raw emotion and life experiences now seemed out of touch and cliche. your instrumentals had so much care poured into them, with most of them containing your own playing of the guitar, piano, drums, and more. now, they were created electronically for the most part by multiple big-shot producers.

you followed the formula for success, so why weren't you reaping the benefits?

your phone screen lit up, notifying you of an email sent by your manager:

RE: Staff Meeting

Y/N,

The numbers aren't looking too good. We need another drop, and soon. We’re having a meeting and you can show us what you came up with so far. We brought in the PR team and they're going to share some ideas with us. The meeting's at 6, don't be late.

you glanced over at the clock. it was 4:44 p.m., which means you still have an hour and 16 minutes to come up with something to show your team.

no matter how hard you tried, you just couldn't come up with anything. it used to come so easy to you. your love songs in particular were always so easy to write, and guaranteed hits at that.

unfortunately for you, being in love is nearly impossible when you're a full-time idol. between hectic schedules and invasive fans, you can't find the time or place to catch feelings for someone.

before you knew it, it was 5:50 and all you had done was mope about how hard it is to make music. packing your belongings, you headed out of the studio and made your way to the SM company building.

once seated at the meeting, you were greeted by your manager and the PR professionals he invited. "so, y/n. we're looking forward to hearing about any progress you might have made for the album." your manager encouraged, smiling at you.

"i... don't have anything," you admitted. the room was dead silent and you were holding yourself back from cringing at your own words. "I was hoping we could maybe just look at a couple of demos?"

"y/n, that's what we did last time, and it clearly isn't appealing to the fans. they want your music. we need the finished album from you by next month." your manager stressed.

"i know, i know. i'm working on it." you muttered. clearing his throat, your manager looked to the PR team, "since there's no new music for us to listen to, i guess you guys can take it from here."

"right, thank you." an unnamed woman in glasses began, "we were thinking of creating a fabricated relationship between miss l/n and another idol here at SM. his group is having a comeback around the same time you are."

you were about to protest before she cut you off, "the relationship doesn't have to go on for long, just until you release new music. it'll generate buzz and people will be more likely to tune in if they think your songs are about him. just consider it." she pleaded.

"who is it?" you questioned, still apprehensive. "shotaro from riize. the group is still recovering after a member of theirs has gone on hiatus following a scandal free seunghan until it's backwards. the two of you are close in age and he's been an idol for a few years now so he's perfect." she persuaded. you saw your manager nod in agreement in the corner of your eye.

"isn't dating as an idol a scandal in itself?" you argued. "yes, but you would generate more good exposure than bad. fans online have been talking about how good of a couple you would make for a while now." your manager butted in.

great. so you're not only going to get death threats from delusional fans but also affirm crazed shippers' beliefs. as badly as you wanted out, you really did need more attention on you as you were preparing to come back. besides, any publicity is good publicity, right?

"fine." you agreed begrudgingly. "wonderful! shotaro has also agreed, we'll have another meeting tomorrow at 10 a.m. with the two of you to go over everything." the lady exclaimed, clasping her hands together excitedly.

smiling politely, you excused yourself and left the room. your manager rushed after you, stopping you from leaving the building. "y/n, listen. I know this is all probably really uncomfortable, but I think it'll be good for you." he insisted.

good for streams, maybe. "i'll be fine. it's only a month, right?" you smiled. "right." he affirmed, patting you on the back before walking in the opposite direction.

once he was out of sight your smile immediately dropped. you made your way out the doors of the building preparing yourself for the lonely commute home.

despite being surrounded by fans and paparazzi constantly, you felt pretty lonely most of your days. you rarely had time to see your friends and family, and you didn't have any group members to share the burden of loneliness with.

making your way to the parking lot, you bumped into an energetic figure, causing your keys to drop. the two of you bent down at the same time and your heads collided. stepping back, you looked up at the stranger that had just made your already shit day even shittier.

he picked up your keys first before standing straight and looking back at you. laughing, he handed them over to you, apologizing for the inconvenience.

to your surprise, it was shotaro. the man you had to act like you were in love starting tomorrow. he had incredibly soft features and the brownest, biggest eyes that you could get lost in forever.

"hey, I recognize you!" he chirped, "I was told you would be at the meeting tomorrow for..." he trailed off, the air between you suddenly awkward.

"yeah." you added dryly. "well it was nice meeting you." you pushed past him. "nice meeting you as well!" he called out, enthusiastically waving.

he's so sweet it's sickening.

maybe you're being a bit of a bitch, but your life feels like it's falling apart. stepping into your car, you took a moment to breathe before starting it and heading home.

the next morning, you wanted nothing more than to rot in bed, but your annoyingly loud alarm reminded you of your impending meeting with shotaro. you didn't see the harm in getting a few more minutes of beauty sleep so you hit the snooze button and drifted back off.

unfortunately, those few minutes turned into an hour, and the next thing you know, you had twenty minutes until your meeting. panicking, you rush to wash your face and get dressed, sprinting down the stairs of your apartment.

once you're seated in the car, you're greeted with a blaring sign: empty tank. just your luck. you have under 10 minutes to get to the SM building and it's a twenty-minute walk from your place.

you checked the bus schedules frantically but none of them seemed to come in time. mentally cursing yourself, you began running in the direction of the company building.

there was no way you were going to make it in time. but this was better than nothing. after about 5 minutes of sprinting like your life depended on it, you saw a familiar face in a car waiting at a stoplight: shotaro.

you don't know how you managed to bump into him yet again but you couldn't really afford to care at this moment. knocking on the window lightly, you saw him look at you shocked.

he rolled down his window, "are you okay?" he asked, slightly freaked out. "i'm so sorry i promise i'll explain but could you please let me in because the light is about to turn green." you begged.

he stared at you shocked for a few seconds before you practically yelled at him to let you in. unlocking the doors, he watched you jump in. he definitely thought you were crazy.

and you couldn't blame him either. looking in the window, you saw your reflection for the first time since you left home: sweat beading on your forehead from running and your hair frizzy and half out of your bun.

while putting together your appearance as best as you could, he coughed loudly, "you said you were going to explain...?" he cautioned.

"right. I slept through my alarm, my car ran out of gas, and I was planning on booking it for the interview since there were no buses available either. oh, and sorry again for scaring you." you rattled on.

you expected him to react like most people if put in this situation: slightly annoyed but accepting of the situation.

he simply laughed. "well then I'm glad you ran into me!" he cheered with a genuine smile on his face. what the hell was his problem?

you knew idols would put on cheery, cute personas for the camera, but you never met someone so honestly enthusiastic. you would be lying if you said it wasn't refreshing, but it felt too good to be true.

you arrived at the building within a matter of minutes. "thank you, once again." you turned to shotaro once the two of you reached the elevator. "no worries." he smiled.

you’d be lying if you said he wasn’t extremely handsome, and his kind demeanor made him even more attractive.

you caught yourself staring at him intensely, suddenly feeling nervous in the cramped elevator alone with him.

he kept trying to make conversation but you were completely zoned out, only being able to focus on how good he looked in his oversized black sweater.

your eyes kept nervously flitting between him and the elevator door, and you were beginning to sweat. has he always been this hot?

after what felt like an eternity, the elevator door opened and you practically sprinted out, making a beeline for the conference room. never have you been more relieved to see a room full of PR professionals.

you and shotaro sat down a safe distance away from each other. you’re not sure what overcame you in the elevator.

you haven’t had any romance in your life for so long that every little thing gets you flustered, including being alone in a small space with a good looking man.

“thank you both for coming today.” the same woman from yesterday greeted. “if you don’t mind, we’d like to walk you through the month-long plan of your ‘relationship’” she shared, using quotation marks.

“firstly, we want the two of you to be spotted out together. going to cafe’s, the movies, even just for a walk. hold hands, hug, kiss if you feel like it.” you couldn’t help but look at shotaro for the last bit and you were shocked to see he was already looking at you.

“we’ll call on paparazzi and companies like dispatch to ‘catch you in the act’ and post your photos online for people to catch on.” she continued, nodding at a man next to her.

“then we’re going to make an official announcement on behalf of the company that you two are officially dating. you know, ‘the pair are getting to know each other and we would appreciate your privacy bla bla bla’” the man said, far less professionally.

“right. you two will continue your outings for another week or so after and then you come back, and we will make a statement on behalf of the company that you have broken up to focus on your schedules. how does that sound?” the lady wrapped up.

“sounds good to me.” shotaro replied coolly. “yeah, um, sounds good.” you sputtered, a bit overwhelmed.

suddenly, you heard a loud ping on the woman’s phone. she looked down and looked up again between you and shotaro, “well, it looks like you two have already set the plan into motion.” she chuckled.

looking closer at her phone, you saw an online article showing pictures from just an hour ago of you in shotaro’s car titled “y/n and shotaro: potential lovebirds?”

what the hell? how did those photos get out so fast… and when were they even taken?

although you were growing increasingly anxious about your lack of privacy, you had to admit the PR team knew what they were talking about, people were going insane over the article.

“since you’ve already been spotted together today, you might as well go on a ‘date’ later in the afternoon to seal the deal.” an older man opposite you added in air quotes.

you and shotaro simply nodded in agreement and before you knew it, the meeting was coming to a close.

grabbing your bag, you prepared to speed-walk out of the room and avoid shotaro until your inevitable ‘date’ but he seemed to have other plans.

“wait up, y/n!” he hollered, catching up to you. “i know we’re kind of being forced to hang out, but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy each other’s company!” he began, “what’s your favorite coffee shop? mine’s-”

“look i appreciate you trying to make light of the situation, but this is just a marketing strategy, nothing more and nothing less.” you cut him off, “let’s just go to the bakery across the street, make lovey dovey eyes at each other, and go our separate ways, yeah?”

his smile faded a bit which made you feel guilty, but he recovered quickly and nodded, following you out the company building.

once you arrived at the bakery, you tried to seem as interested as possible in whatever shotaro was talking about, but your brain was still foggy from the hectic morning you had.

“anyways, what about you?” the singer excitedly asked, “…what about me?” you repeated through gritted teeth, forcing a smile in case any cameras were on you.

“i was asking if you started preparing for your new album.” he smiled. “oh. um, yeah.” you shrugged, avoiding eye contact.

“you know i’m a big fan of your music,” shotaro started, “i loved your debut album, i listen to at least one song from it every day.” he shared shyly.

well great. now you felt even more bad for being so unnecessarily rude to him. softening your demeanor, you replied with “thanks… i really liked ‘get a guitar’, too.”

his eyes lit up upon you mentioning his track, which you took as a sign to continue, “but i can never get the dance quite right.” you added, grinning.

“i can always teach you!” he beamed.

“that would be nice-”

“oh my GOD, is that shotaro?” a stranger gasped, causing both your and shotaro’s heads to snap in opposite directions.

even though you were technically trying to get caught, old idol habits die hard. dating scandals are every idol’s biggest fear: an entire dedicated fanbase turning on you just for experiencing romance? true nightmare fuel.

“and i think that’s y/n with him! why are they here together?” another stranger spoke up. you and shotaro swiftly picked up your belongings and left, worried you’d attract more attention.

“i’ll-um-see you, bye.” you mumbled with your head down as shotaro gave you a small thumbs up underneath the table.

the two of you set off in different directions and you began dreading the long walk home. you were wearing a mask and a beanie, which meant your chances of getting recognized were pretty low, but they definitely weren’t zero.

however, you loved walking through seoul, especially this time of year. the weather was nice, and the streets were bustling. you used to love brainstorming song lyrics and melodies during walks.

deciding to take advantage of your situation, you racked your brain for any potential lyrics.

nothing.

how could you have lost all your creativity? did your songwriting talent just disappear? how would you get it back?

doubts filled your mind as you realized you were already halfway home and failed to come up with a single verse.

maybe you were lacking inspiration. your life was filled with romantic endeavors prior to your debut, which filled your mind with several ideas for new songs.

but you seemed to have forgotten all of them, and as cheesy as it sounds, you might have forgotten how it feels to be in love as well.

nearing your apartment, you felt a vibration in your pocket. taking out your phone, you opened up an email from your manager:

Re: Dating News

Hello Y/N,

Seems like your bakery date is already going viral on SNS. A pair of fans spotted you two and uploaded a photo of you sitting at a table together. Keep up the good work.

[1 Attachment]

clicking on the attachment, you saw a screenshot of a tweet exclaiming ‘RIIZE SHOTARO AND Y/N L/N ON A DATE???’ with a picture of the two of you smiling and sitting across from each other at a table.

it freaked you out how happy the two of you looked in the photo, almost like a real couple.

shutting off your phone, you couldn’t help but smile as you entered your apartment, maybe shotaro was starting to grow on you.

in the next few weeks, you and shotaro would go on several public outings, getting spotted almost immediately.

before you knew it the two of you were the hottest topic in k-pop, headlining several media outlet articles and trending on social media.

you would periodically receive correspondence from your manager and PR team praising you for how well you were pulling the stunt off.

although you wouldn’t admit it, you were really starting to enjoy shotaro’s company as well. the two of you began texting until late hours at night and planning ‘dates’ without instruction from your team.

you’d be lying if you said you weren’t starting to feel a bit attached to him but you reminded yourself that this was simply a work thing. besides, it’s not like he’s interested anyway… right?

you couldn’t read shotaro at all. he always had a sweet smile plastered on his face and seemed excited about everything and anything.

weirdly, you felt your writing ability start to come back slowly as well.. but it obviously has nothing to do with shotaro!

it’s just a coincidence that you draw on your memories of him to come up with lyrics; that you describe his mannerisms to a T in your potential choruses and scribble about how he makes you feel in your notebook on your off-days.

yup! definitely just a coincidence.

“y’know i used to love these growing up,” shotaro shared as the two of you stood at a street food stall indulging in dango.

“you must miss japan a lot, huh?” you asked, staring at the side of his face. his expression faltered slightly.

“of course i do, but i’m glad i chased after my dreams. it sounds cliché but it paid off. i get to do what i love, even if i’m hundreds of miles away from home.” he replied softly.

you don’t know what it was, but in that moment you wanted nothing more than to kiss him. you stared at his lips for a few moments before he caught on.

“do i have something on my face..?” he questioned, raising a finger to wipe his mouth.

you leaned in, centimeters away from touching your lips with his when he stepped back.

shit. way to go, y/n.

“sorry, i just- i don’t think we should…” he stammered,

“no, i’m sorry. i don’t know what came over me. we-i should go.” you said awkwardly, biting your lip.

you headed off before he could reply, mentally cursing at the world and wanting to crawl into a hole and die.

how could you let your guard down like that and embarrass yourself?

that night, you didn’t receive a single text from him like you usually do, so you tried reaching out.

no response.

every time you contacted him afterwards or tried to set up another ‘date’ he would flake last minute or respond dryly until he full-on ghosted you.

you stopped heading out together and your manager seemed content with it as you had already generated enough anticipation for your comeback.

the next time you saw him would be at a company meeting, discussing the end of your ‘relationship’.

you zoned out the entire meeting, barely hearing anything coming out of anyone’s mouth. you focused on trying not to look at shotaro and keeping your thoughts preoccupied so you felt less embarrassed just being in his presence.

your manager briefed you on the contents of the meeting afterwards, sharing that all you had to do was release a joint statement that confirmed you were now broken up.

“it’s easy enough, you mostly leave it to the social media managers. just send them your virtual signature and be sure to post it on your instagram as soon as possible. got it?” the man asked.

you nodded wordlessly with your head still in the clouds. for the first time in a long time your mind was filled with new ideas for lyrics, ranging from lovestruck to heartbroken to enraged.

you opted to walk home that day, even taking the longer route, furiously typing in your notes app and recording several voice notes on the way. you must’ve looked insane to everyone else around you but you didn’t care.

if you couldn’t get your mind off shotaro, you’d at least make it work in your favor. that night, you wrote an impressive 10 drafts of different songs, staying up until late and getting up early the next morning to head to the studio.

you drowned yourself in your work, hoping you’d forget about the boy whose presence was still all around you in both your thoughts and lyrics.

eventually, you refined and recorded all 10 songs, ready to release them in your new album.

shortly before your album announcement, you posted your official ‘breakup’ statement, feeling empty as you tapped on your screen.

you never would’ve predicted the somewhat annoying and yet incredibly charming guy that you were forced into a relationship with would haunt you this much.

you even found yourself looking through old posts and articles about the two of you, reminiscing on your time as a fake couple.

it stung knowing it was completely one-sided, and it stung even more knowing you could’ve still had him as a friend if you didn’t stupidly act on impulse.

you saw him here and there entering and leaving the SM building and the two of you would share a polite smile and bow before rushing off.

the response to your breakup announcement was unprecedented, and the amount of people heartbroken for the both of you took you by surprise.

riizeandrealize: ‘love isn’t real after all 💔💔’

y/n4eva: ‘at least we know the new album is gonna hit’

y/ntaro: ‘NOOO MY PARENTS’

tarosho28: ‘awww… so that means shotaro’s single again? 😁’

scrolling through the comments absentmindedly, one in specific caught your attention:

user1129399: ‘she always seemed more into him than he did. he’s probably the one that broke it off’

you felt hot with rage, what does a stupid netizen on the internet know? and why is their comment making you so upset?

maybe because they were partially right. you obviously were more into him or he would’ve been more receptive to your humiliating attempt at a kiss.

your album was set to come out in a week and you had a set track list recorded and ready.

and yet, you felt compelled to add one more song.

you went to work immediately, writing so fast your words were barely legible but you could read it perfectly fine.

you wrote as intensely and specifically as you could about everything—from your first encounter to your last. you tried to keep your other songs vague enough to avoid any suspicion on shotaro’s part about the subject of the lyrics, but you didn’t care anymore.

you were in love with osaki shotaro and you needed to express it in the only way you know how.

“are you insane?” your manager’s voice boomed over the line.

“it’s already recorded, and i have the backing vocals done too. i just need one more day to get the production team together and it’ll be done and ready to add to the album.” you pleaded.

“fine.” he sighed, “this better be worth it.”

“it will be.” at this point you weren’t sure if you were assuring him or yourself.

this was your most personal and emotional piece of work yet, and you were worried shitless about what response it would receive.

luckily for you, it did amazing on the charts and with your fans. in fact, your fanbase almost doubled in size and you were experiencing even more success than you were already.

unluckily for you, you still felt like shit.

your life felt empty without shotaro in it and no amount of fans, cameras, or praise could fill that void.

as you were preparing to go out onto stage for a music show, you ran into a familiar figure heading out of the green room.

of course it was none other than the one person you have been thinking about nonstop for the past month, wrote an entire album about, and the same guy who probably cringes every time he hears it play on the radio.

you gave him a polite smile before rushing towards the hair and makeup room.

“wait. y/n, can we talk real quick?” he began nervously.

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfu-

“y/n?” he repeated, snapping you back to reality.

“yes. of course.” you responded, trying to sound as collected as possible.

“i-uh listened to your new album. it’s amazing. i loved track 11 the most.” he smiled softly, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

of course you liked that track, it’s obviously about you.

“thanks! is that all?” you rushed, preparing to sprint away at any moment.

“no! honestly, i wanted to apologize for the way things ended.” he confessed,

you knew how this was going to end. he was going to give you some bullshit excuse for ghosting you instead of just telling you he wasn’t interested and waste 5 minutes of your time.

but you don’t have 5 minutes to waste. you need to get up on stage and sing about how bad he hurt you.

pathetic, but at least you’re self aware.

“save it. i know you don’t feel the same way and that’s fine. but you could’ve at least told me. you didn’t have to shut me out, I thought we were friends at the very least.” you exploded, suddenly feeling a burst of adrenaline.

“but y/n-”

“and i’m not in the mood for excuses. you had a month to think of a good excuse but i guess there just isn’t one. you know i just hope you can take this experience and learn to never do this to some other girl because-”

“y/n you’re not listening to me.”

“why should i? you didn’t bother listening to me when i called you all those times. and about track 11, yes it’s about you. the whole fucking album is about you and i bet you already knew that-”

your petty rant was cut short when you felt something press gently against your lips… but he definitely wasn’t kissing you.

oh my god. did he just physically shush me? he carefully removed his finger from it’s place in front of your now-closed lips.

“did you just shush me?! have you lost your damn mind-” you began again,

“y/n!” he practically yelled, now gaining the attention from several staff members.

“i know what i did was shitty and I’m sorry. you’re right, i shouldn’t have ghosted you. but it’s not because i didn’t feel the same way. i’ve loved you for a while now.”

your jaw dropped, along with several eavesdropper’s jaws throughout the now dead-silent hallway.

“i was scared that you didn’t see me in that way but when i found out that you did… i panicked. i was too scared to tell you how i felt and i know i’m an idiot for it.” he looked down. “i’m not going to beg you to take me back or anything, but can we at least go back to the way we were? friends?”

“y/n, you need to get to hair and makeup NOW! you’re running out of time before your performance!” a staff member called out before you could respond, dragging you away.

well great. now you have to pretend everything’s alright and sing a little song on stage when your whole world has been flipped upside down.

as you sat in the makeup chair, you pondered over what would happen if you did agree to start over with shotaro, would you be happy?

before you knew it, you were on stage facing a crowd full of people staring right at you. you usually wouldn’t mind, you’re an idol after all. but the whole situation was just overstimulating you.

luckily the backtrack began playing before you could overthink and you were able to escape from reality for a few minutes to sing and perform.

you missed this feeling. you missed staying up writing, listening proudly to your new music you poured your heart into, and giving your all on stage every performance.

at the end of your song, the crowd erupted into cheers. you looked onto all the banners with your name and face plastered onto them gratefully.

whether you liked it or not, shotaro brought your spark back. yes it caused you immense pain and suffering, but it also gave you moments of joy, including the one you were experiencing right now.

once you wrapped up, you headed backstage, surprised to see shotaro standing by the monitor. was he watching your performance?

“i made up my mind.” you announced, walking up to him.

“are you sure you don’t need more time?” he asked, nervous.

“you’re a dumbass for what you did,” you started, noting how his face fell, “but i’d be an even bigger dumbass to pretend i don’t want to be with you.”

the contagious smile you’re used to seeing slowly reappeared on his face, causing you to slowly smile as well before you quickly corrected yourself.

“but… i want a proper apology. maybe you could give me one at the bakery tomorrow morning?” you mused.

“it’s a date.” he responded warmly.

#kpop reactions #kpop scenario #riize #riize x reader #riize imagines #riize fluff #shotaro #osaki shotaro #nct u #shotaro x reader #riize reactions #riize scenarios

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starsandhughes · 1 year

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Penalty Box— Trevor Zegras (Part Twenty-Six)

SERIES MASTERLIST

previous: twenty-five

welcome to the final game day post of the season! thank you all for loving this series so much that it has developed into what it is now! i’ve got many surprises in store for the summer, and i can’t wait to share them! first surprise coming soon ;)

THURSDAY, APRIL 13TH

yourusername

liked by trevorzegras, jamie.drysdale, and 11,194 others

yourusername welcome to my final 2022-23 season penalty box update show (cue the sad awes)! buckle up and hold onto your butts and iced coffees buttercups because you are in for a WILD ride!

let’s start off with the highlights before i get into my boyfriend’s extra curricular activities for those who missed this beautiful monstrosity of a game! to start off this freeway faceoff rivalry, dad scored the opening goal goal 2:44 minutes in! so my dad of him! but alas, before the period ended a k*ng scored. there were three penalties this period: jonesy for cross checking, a k*ng for interfering with lundy, and a delay of game bench minor served by stromer. it was a very nice attempt to clear the goal, but alas, stromer was sent to pay for dallas’s crime.

second period was fairly mild, but almost halfway through, z-baby got his first penalty of the night (yes, you read that correctly) for hi-sticking! the spelling of this penalty cracks me up because it’s like “hi!! here’s my stick!! in your face!! as a gift!!” then mr. drew helleson got his first nhl penalty for hooking! congratulations! and lastly, a k*ng was sent to jail for attempted murder against dad. good riddance! love you, dad!

special note, here is what the commentators said sbout z’s first penalty: “i know trevor zegras is real good friends with jack hughes but he needs to take a page out of that book” (this is in reference to jack only have six minutes this season, and trevor after this penalty had 77. it has since increased.)

third period is when this gets wild, laid-eez! we started off strong with stromer getting a tripping penalty 4:40 in. THEN, z-baby was sent to the bin with seven seconds left in stromer’s penalty to serve the too many men bench minor, which was hilarious imo. as soon as stromer’s penalty ended, he hit the puck over the glass, and had to turn his ass around right back into the box for a delay of game penalty and this was the funniest thing i’ve ever witnessed. at 15:25, the chaos ensued. trevor was wrongly abused and he retaliated, causing a big ol scrum in front of the bench. the k*ng that committed the hate crime got a double minor for roughing against z, and grant got a roughing minor for roughing against said k*ng, as well as my cute lil psycho boyfriend. my said boyfriend ran his mouth a lil too much and received a misconduct that got him ejected from the game. NOT EVEN A MINUTE LATER, multiple fights broke out at once where “everybody chose a dance partner” (thank you commentators for that lovely quotes) which got jonesy and carrick both ejected with misconducts, and nesty had to serve carrick’s boarding penalty that started it all. i was THRILLED and having the time of my life to say the least!

to end, i would like to address that z and i have a long talk in the locker room, and i have received explicit permission from all guilty parties to post this. i also want to say how proud i am of this team for pushing through, and i’m sorry that you didn’t get the end you all wanted. i love each and every one of you!

and to my lovely z, congratulations on your 23rd goal tonight. congratulations on all other accomplishments this season and beating your previous career highs! i’ve seen you do some beautiful, mind blowing, magical things this season, and i know you’re only going to get better from here. i can’t wait to spend the summer with you🧡 i love you, always, trevor <3

tagged trevorzegras

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trevorzegras thank you for everything you did for me tonight, my sweet girl🧡 i love you, forever!

jamie.drysdale was she nice first or angry first?

trevorzegras @/jamie.drysdale luke doesn’t call her scary sissy behind her back for nothing

yourusername i’m not gonna argue with that

trevorzegras @/yourusername i called luke out and you’re going to say nothing?

yourusername @/trevorzegras he scored his first goal tonight!

trevorzegras @/yourusername I SCORED A GOAL TONIGHT

yourusername @/trevorzegras AND THEN YOU SCORED A MISCONDUCT

jamie.drysdale i feel so safe in my home

user38 y/n is right, this game was a beautiful monstrosity

tterry19 love you, too! thanks for sticking by us!

yourusername i always will <3

user6 look at trevor holding his coffee i love that little shit lmao

jamie.drysdale (beware i’m about to be sappy) i just want to say thank you for staying with me during my injury and supporting not only z, but me, too, in the few games i played. we’ve gotten so much closer this year and i’m really glad we did, wifey! can’t wait for you to switch between mine and z’s jerseys at games next season! i love you! (p.s. thanks for letting my play guitar in the house!)

yourusername jamie drysdale i will come into your room and sob into your chest the second we get home istg

jackhughes @/yourusername are you not with him right now?

yourusername @/jackhughes i’m in the bathroom

trevorzegras @/yourusername get off your phone i want to go home

jamie.drysdale @/trevorzegras why? just why? she’ll never leave the bathroom now

trevorzegras @_quinnhughes

_quinnhughes @/yourusername sissy, i’ll throw away your blanket you have here if you don’t leave because if i get one more text from trevor i’ll fly down there and smother him myself

yourusername F I N E

user16 z and stormer in the box together post stromer going back in is so funny

frank_vatrano you’ve been great to have around as a cheerleader this season! love you lots, y/n/n!

yourusername awww tank! i love you tooooo

anaheimducks we love our wags!

yourusername and we love you!

user49 derek grant is my hero because he got a roughing penalty and sat back and relaxed 😂

yourusername just a king doing king shit (he semi tried to comfort my boyfriend)

_quinnhughes sissy, be honest, how many individual feelings are you feeling right now?

trevorzegras y/n is unavailable right now. she’s under my shirt.

jamie.drysdale we saw her laugh, cry, and thank the hockey gods in a span of two minutes before she got under it but we’ll tell her you asked

yourusername at least twelve emotions and four of them are partly your fault, quintin. thank you, i’m obsessed with you, and i love you <3

_quinnhughes @/yourusername i love you, too! now go to bed <3

colecaufield i cannot share my thoughts at the risk of breaking z’s heart and trust

trevorzegras you’re so good to me

yourusername text me your thoughts

colecaufield kk

trevorzegras update: cole is not that good to me

user77 if this game didn’t perfectly sum up this season idk what would

shattdeuces i love you, daughter! you’ve been a delight to have around these last couple of years! can’t wait to see what chaos you create next season!

yourusername oohhhhh i got big prank ideas, mom! and i love you, too!

user22 can’t wait for the hot z edits

masonmctavish23 thanks for making my rookie year special! you’re one of the most welcoming people i’ve ever met!

yourusername everyone is a sap in my comments tonight aw! i love you mac-t!

masonmctavish23 i love you, too

jackhughes you’re telling me you threatened no one to comment nice things? people just are?

yourusername this team worships me idk what to tell you

trevorzegras she is a fan favorite

jackhughes i am absolutely perplexed

_quinnhughes @/jackhughes stop using big boy words its scary

yourusername @_quinnhughes it’s***

lhughes_06 college dropout alert

_quinnhughes @/lhughes_06 says the one who dropped out a week ago

trevorzegras since there’s been so much love in the comments tonight, i just want to publicly announce that i have the best and most supportive girlfriend in the world who went out of her way to ensure she supported all of her friends in family in their big moments, and their worst. everyone deserves a y/n, but i, along with the few lucky others, get the best one🧡

jamie.drysdale psa: y/n cannot respond as she’s under my shirt now

trevorzegras @_quinnhughes come quick

_quinnhughes @/trevorzegras booking a flight

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rebo-chan · 5 months

Text

Sorry y'all this one's gonna be a long one lol fun analysis/theorizing/headcanoning whatever the fuck this is under the cut :)

So, lately I've been really thinking about Lambo and Tsuna's relationship, Lambo's connection to Vongola, and Lambo's spot as the Lightning Guardian. I know as a fandom, we tend to disregard Lambo because he has like.. two fights in the whole series or wish that someone else was made the Lightning Guardian because that boy is Literally Five. And I won't act like it wouldn't have been cool to see another character as Lightning Guardian (My Haru Guardian fans rise up where are you) but I think what Amanos done here is really fun too from an analysis perspective.

To start with, Tsuna's family is not really a..traditional Mafia family or even a traditional Vongola family either. Let's look at this here, he's got his Two Best Friends(TM), his crush's big brother, the leader of the Disciplinary Committee at his school, a criminal, a half dead girl, and the aforementioned five year old as his guardians. This is FAR from what's likely expected out of the Vongola family, even when you date it back to Primo AT LEAST PRIMO HAD PRINCES, PRIESTS, SAMURAIS as his guardians. (Though he gets away with having One Best Friend (TM) as his guardian.) Yet somehow, their family makes it work!! They survive the Mafia world, multiple times throughout the series and when it's not working they get stronger as a unit and they fight for each other and make it out together. And I think that's the beauty of their specific family.

So then you have Lambo, who Tsuna would do anything for just to avoid Lambo having to experience a fraction of the shit they go through. And Tsuna actually SUCCEEDS at this, he doesn't normally succeed when it comes to being avoidant of Mafia stuff but this was something throughout the series that he was so genuinely adamant against. He only let Lambo fight when he truly had to and even then he very minimally let the Mafia world wrap its greedy paws around Lambo. Kokuyo arc, Tsuna didn't even sort of kind of a little bit consider taking Lambo with them (which would later help keep Kyoko and Haru safe), Varia arc, knowing that this would disqualify him, Tsuna decided he could not allow Lambo to keep fighting.

Future Arc, Tsuna kept Lambo out of the fight as much as he could, allowing the non-fighters to take care of him and I-pin. Shimon Arc, Tsuna felt real regret at the prospect that he allowed Lambo to come.

(And Arco arc where Lambo was hardly present at either, which I'd like to imagine that if Lambo was involved in Arco arc then Tsuna may have just absolutely fucking died)

Tsuna to Lambo is not his guardian (Frankly, he doesn't view any of his guardians as such, they are his friends, his pride, his comrades, and those he has traded blows with and knows they can be trusted.) Lambo to Tsuna is his little brother. This five year old was sent on an assassination attempt that was absolutely in no circumstance meant to actually succeed and the Bovinos know that. To send Lambo to assassinate the strongest hitman was a death mission. So, Tsuna took this child in (or rather this child stuck around bc his Mom makes banger meals) and immediately Tsuna assumes the role of his brother. Lambo and Tsuna are the closest out of all the kids. (Ofc Tsuna loves I-pin and fuuta too, but I think it's safe to say Lambo is his dumb little brother)

Now, I don't think that Tsuna is ever going to see Lambo as anything but his little brother. I actually theorize that the way TYL Lambo is the way he is because Tsuna never really got out of the habit of babying him. He's calmed down since he was a kid and developed a more nonchalant personality with the occasional tantrum because you can't tell me Tsuna DOESNT STILL view TYL Lambo as a non-combatant. When Tsunas 15, he looks at 5 year old Lambo and goes no thanks that boy is never touching a weapon in his life. When Tsunas is 25, he sees 15 year Lambo and goes that is STILL a child he is never touching a weapon in his life. And yes he's completely unaware of the hypocrisy in my head.

This is a spoiled little brother no one can tell me otherwise.

So we know Tsuna just sees him as his kid brother and not a real guardian. But then you have Lambo's feelings about the whole matter. We know that Lambo doesn't really consider Tsuna a boss but as his big brother, but I don't think that changes a lot for Lambo. While fighting is scary for Lambo, he still desires to follow alongside Tsuna and his friends. He doesn't want to be left behind and makes Tsuna promise him he'll take him wherever he goes. He sees Tsuna freaking out about him being a child in a battlefield and he goes, "No you don't understand, I want to be there."

And that? That right there is what fucks me up after everything. Lambo as a concept for a Lightning Guardian feels really unique because of this. He's the youngest one. He's always going to chase after the others, trying to keep up with them, to walk alongside them. One day, he wants to catch up and be considered a rightful Guardian like the others. And that is so... Tsuna and him would be batting heads over this because I cannot see Tsuna relenting on Lambo staying out of the battle. I cannot see Tsuna ever feeling like Lambo's ready. Not because he thinks Lambo is weak, but because Lambo's his baby brother and Tsuna needs him more away from the battle or else he can't focus.

While Tsuna doesn't react outwardly in this frame, I do think it's not a coincidence that he could focus on fighting the battle and not be "impatient" as Reborn put it, the moment he saw Gokudera and Hibari on the battlefield. He could focus easier knowing his friends were running around saving Lambo and co.

Okay, so you have the Big brother who wants to protect his little brother from seeing the same stuff he does, from fighting the same battles he does, and wants him to grow up as a regular kid (a right which he had been robbed off the moment a certain hitman showed up at his door). Then you have the little brother who wants wholeheartedly to be there, desires to catch up to his big brother and know the world that his big brother knows.

How does this difference in value get addressed? well it doesn't because Lambo is still 5 and Shounen jump are cowards for ending Amanos series when they did <3 B U T we have this.

We all know this scene for when we rewatched Reborn for the first and went "..wait.." because that was some actually sweet foreshadowing from Amano. Okay, so. We have a Lambo who finally did it. Finally is someone worthy of being called the Vongola Lightning Guardian. And Tsuna and co are implied to have just been... Gone. All of Tsuna's efforts to raise this kid in a regular life are ripped away because something happens to HIM, not Lambo. And from Lambo's perspective, he's caught up finally but the person he was following isn't around anymore. He didn't think he'd see him again. I think it's safe to assume that this scene either implies that something happens to Tsuna in his 30s (since we know he wasn't actually dead TYL) OR 20yl Lambo is from a parallel world where Byakuran had actually won and actually took Tsunas life.

And I think that's some real meat to bite into for these characters. A little brother who will lose his big brother if he doesn't do something, get stronger in time. A big brother who won't let him join the battle because he's afraid of losing HIS little brother. A Vongola Lightning Guardian who wants to be a shield for his Boss, and a Boss won't let him be a shield.

And that? That's a good concept for a Vongola Lightning Guardian.

Thank you for reading this far if you did :] this is a bit of a ramble but I was thinking about it and I felt it nice to share. I hope maybe I shared some of my brain worms with you <3

#katekyo hitman reborn #khr #sawada tsunayoshi #lambo bovino #ough this was a long one #why cant i make regular haha funny one liners #whys everything gotta be a thesis paper i s2g

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your-averagewriter · 2 years

Note

I THINK THIS IS WHERE I REQUEST SO IVE JUST HAD AN AMAZING IDEA. So, Gerard x reader. This could go two ways. Way number 1- reader and Gerard hate each other, or way number 2- reader and Gerard are dating. So the reader is messing around with Gerard or he’s annoyed at the reader and he gets really close to the reader and the reader just moans. Like on accident they moan at him. And they’re both in shock and reader locks themselves in their room and one of the other band members comes in somehow and are like ‘it’s okay, also Gerard wants to see you’ for way number 1- Reader comes to see gerard and makes out with reader or for way 2- gerard is like ‘it’s okay, don’t be embarrassed’ and they’re just in love cutely. I hope this wasn’t confusing (but i know it was).

Summary: Gerard hates (y/n) who is Ray Toro’s sibling, after a while, they get annoyed with the constant insults and the rest so they decide to hate him back. They annoy Gerard afterwards for months, back and forth bickering until Gerard accidentally makes them moan leading to confessions from the both of them.

Enemies to lovers, Gerard Way x gender neutral!reader

Warnings: making out, smoking (cigarettes), swearing, alcohol, no smut but kinda heated

Word count: 1.9K

Long car rides are boring but not today, today I’m sat next to Gerard. One of my favourite things is to annoy him and get him riled up, it’s quite entertaining to watch. He hates me, I don’t know why because I never did anything to make him hate me.

When they were looking for a drummer I turned up for the audition and joined the band a week later. We started rehearsals and I was nervous as shit, what if they only let me join because Ray’s my brother? I did everything I could to make the others like me, I was polite, early and did my best in rehearsals but for some reason the frontman just didn’t like me. Everytime I tried to talk to him or be his friend he’d brush me off or be rude and after a while it started to affect me because even though I didn’t want to admit it, I had developed a crush on him.

I asked the rest of the guys if they knew why he didn’t like me but none of them came up with any good ideas, a few joking ‘what if he has a crush on you’s came up from Frank. I felt my heart flutter at the thought but I tried not to get my hopes up.

So once I’d been in the band for a while and had attempted multiple times to be Gerard’s friend I decided that I wouldn’t let him keep making me feel like shit. Instead of trying to be his friend I started answering back and matching his energy. If he doesn’t want to be my friend then I don’t want to be his. It also might have been me overcompensating for liking him but we don’t talk about that part.

So on this car ride, we’re using a five seater car but there’s five of us so we’re all cramped together except from the guys in the front, Mikey’s driving and Frank’s next to him sorting out the GPS and maps. Obviously I was put next to Ray (in the middle) because we’re siblings and best friends and that leaves Gerard who was put on the other side of me.

The whole car ride was full of us bickering and arguing, I would prod his shoulder and do stupid things like that which annoy him. Everytime I saw him nodding off I would ask him if he was asleep therefore waking him up and annoying him.

“Hey, hey Gerard.” I whisper to him but he doesn’t reply. “Hey, I know you’re awake.” I say starting to prod his shoulder.

“(y/n) leave me alone.” He says surprisingly calm. “You’ve been bothering me the entire time.”

“Yeah, well it’s not my fault you smoke in the car and are a bitch about everything.” I say talking about when I took his cigarette and threw it out the window because it smelled bad.

“I’m not a bitch.”

“Oh, you so are.” I counter him, smirking. “You’re such a bitch that you can’t even admit it.” I say laughing.

“You’re insufferable, you know that?” He asks rolling his eyes

“Only for you, baby.” I say blowing him a mocking kiss.

Silence fills the car and I turn around to see everyone but Mikey (who’s driving) looking at us.

“What?” I ask with a chuckle then turn to look at Gerard. His arms are crossed and he’s starring out the window in silence.

“First time I’ve seen him silent in a while.” Frank jokes from the front.

“Shut up, Frankie.” Gerard says sounding very pissed off.

“Okay, everyone, there’s not long left, just leave each other alone.” Ray says trying to calm everyone down.

I turn around to Ray and we just talk quietly for the rest of the ride. He wasn’t wrong and there was only thirty minutes till the next tour stop.

This show is one of the biggest shows on the tour so the place we’re staying is slightly bigger and nicer. We grab our night bags, basically the bags with our pajamas. The rest of the bags will be unpacked tomorrow when either we can be bothered to do it or someone will bring them in.

I grab mine and yawn as I walk towards the hotel we’re staying in.

Someone signs us in and we make our way up the stairs to our rooms. We each have our own room and beds but there’s a communal room attached to a kitchen.

Once everyone’s thrown their bags in their rooms they all regrouped in the lounge area. I walk in afterwards walking into the kitchen and I check the fridge for some beer. Grabbing one I walk over to where everyone’s sat and slouch on the sofa.

“Why do they keep giving us kitchens, we never use them.” I say opening the can.

“Why don’t you invest in a cook book and cook us all some food then.” Frank says jokingly.

“Nah, not worth it.” I say resting my arm on the arm rest.

Gerard finally walks in and has to sit next to me because there are no other spaces. He pulls out a cigarette pack and lighter and starts clicking the lighter.

“Smoke outside!” I say not wanting to inhale the smoke.

“Fine! Calm down.” He says jabbing me with his elbow and I…moan.

My eyes go wide and my hand flies to my mouth. Frank looks shocked but amused. Ray’s head is in his hand and Mikey’s already laughing. Gerard, I don’t even want to look at him.

I stand up quickly and hurry out the room heading towards my room. I lock my door behind me and stand not moving a muscle still in shock.

“What the fuck is wrong with me? Oh my god!” I mutter to myself quietly now pacing around the room, head in hands.

I drag my hand through my hair, cringing at the memory of a few minutes ago. I feel my cheeks warming as I wonder what’s going to happen next.

Is Gerard going to mock me? I know Frank and Mikey will. Is he gonna ignore me? Am I gonna get kicked out the band? I think that might be a bit too far but who knows.

A knock on the door disrupts my racing thoughts.

“Go away.” I say not knowing who it is.

“(y/n), it’s me, Ray, can you let me in?” He says and I groan before standing up and unlocking the door.

I sit on the bed and cover my face with my hands.

“Hey, it’s okay.” He says sitting down next to me and placing his hand on my shoulders.

“No, it’s not! It’s so embarrassing!” I whisper shout still covering my face.

“It happens to the best of us.” Ray tries to reassure me.

“No, no it doesn’t, has that ever happened to you before?” He stays quiet. “Or anyone you know?” He stays silent. “See, it’s weird and embarrassing!”

“It’s not. Frank and Mikey aren’t even talking about it, they’ve moved on. And Gerard, he wants to see you.”

“Tell him I don’t want to.” I say finally looking at Ray.

“Just talk to him, it’ll be fine, and if it’s not we can kick Gerard out the band.” He says jokingly.

“Ugh, fine. Where is he? I’m not meeting him in the communal room.” I say scoffing at the thought of talking to him in front of the others.

“He was in his room last time I saw him.”

“Okay, I’ll go when you leave, I need to mentally prepare myself for rejection and humiliation.” I say with a sarcastic smile and thumbs up.

He shakes his head before leaving, closing the door. I lay back on the bed and take a few deep breaths before leaving my room. The walk to his room feels like the walk to a slaughterhouse. Finally, I end up outside his door, I knock.

“It’s unlocked.” I hear him say from within so I push open the door and walk in finally looking him in the face. I shut the door behind me and wait for him to speak but he doesn’t.

“Can we just get on with the rejection and humiliation please? I have things to do.” I ask him as he stands a few steps away from me.

He leans forward quickly, pouncing on my lips. He kisses me harshly and I stand in shock before pushing him off.

“Nope, you can’t do that!” I say annoyed. “You can’t hate me and ignore me then kiss me!” He steps back away from me.

“I don’t hate you.” He says quietly.

“Yes, you do, when I joined the band I tried to talk to you and befriend you many, many times and you either ignored me or were straight up insulting! You’re just rude to me and you brush me off all the time!”

“You’re the same to me.”

“Yeah, because I decided to not let you make me feel shitty anymore and match your energy. You’re shitty to me so I am back to you.” I say like it’s obvious, sadness and anger dripping from my voice.

“I’m sorry.” He says with a sigh. “I-I just, I knew that if I was friends with you I wouldn’t be able to stay away. I knew that I would catch feelings for you.” He pauses. “But I guess it wouldn’t have mattered because I did anyway.” He explains. “I thought you hated me aswell.”

Silence fills the room at the unexpected confession I was definitely not ready for.

“I could never.” A small smile plays on my lips.

I grab his collar pulling him towards me. He stumbles but doesn’t fall as our lips crash together. I feel my back pressed up against the wall as his arms pin me to it, my stomach is tied in knots as I thread my hands in his hair. The bleached strands frame his face and I tug on them experimentally and Gerard moans into my mouth. Separting, I pull apart from him and smirk.

“Pay back for earlier.” I say and observe him. His cheeks are flushed red, his mouth open slightly releasing quick breaths, his eyes dreamy and loving. But he turns it on me quickly.

“I can’t believe you moaned because I elbowed you-” He says mockingly.

I interrupt him, pulling him back in and kissing him. He pulls me forward slightly, pressing our bodies against each other, warmth spreading between us. Shivers run up my spine as my head is pushed against the wall. His confidence overwhelms mine as he pushes his tongue into my mouth, swirling it around mine, my eyes flutter close and I feel my stomach jump. He tastes of coffee and cigarette smoke. I hate cigarettes but he pulls it off so well, the remnants of smoke play on my taste buds as the kiss deepens.

He moves to stand inbetween my legs, pushing them apart, I moan at the sudden movement in between my thighs. Excitement overwhelms me and I feel my legs become weak.

“Hey guys, I came to check on how things are going.” Ray says pushing the door open. We jump apart as soon as we hear him but it’s too late anyway. He covers his eyes quickly and backs out the door. “Sorry, should’ve knocked, umm, well done though.” He says the last part in a weaker voice. He must’ve realised I liked him at some point.

I stand next to the wall still looking at Gerard. “Do you think we broke him?” Gerard asks and I just shrug before pulling him back in by his shirt.

AN: Thanks for the request, I hope you liked this @heaveaux!

Feel free to send in any requests you have, I'll make a post with all the people/shows/bands I'll write for.

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honoviadakai · 2 years

Text

Ivan’s neck scar

(Cw: mentions of decapitation, mentions of attempted s*icide, violent historical events and mental health issues)

So in case this is new information, Ivan Braginsky does in fact have a scar around his neck

(not the best image but it’s there under the neck bandages, I promise)

It’s not yet been revealed when or how he got that scar but it’s there and Ivan seems to not what people to see it, much less talk about it. That leads me to believe that whatever happened was a very traumatic incident for him which leads me to a few theories.

Mongolia or Tatarstan attacked Ivan when he was a child.

When a very young Ivan first meets a very young Tolis, he explains to him that living under Tatar is very difficult and that he wants to become a crazy strong country soon so he is no longer under their control. There’s even a brief moment where you can see blood on Ivan’s hands, and maybe even on his clothes, implying he has to fight everyday just to survive till the next day. It’s very possible that Ivan tried to rebel a few times. Given that at the time he was a very small child, neither of the aforementioned older nations probably punished him too severely but I can see a situation where they got fed up with Ivan’s rebellious attitude and either completely or partially decapitated him as a way to show him who was stronger and that if he kept rebelling, they’d do worse.

Either Feliks or Tolis tried to decapitate him.

Both Lithuania and Poland we’re having wars with Russia/the Soviet Union starting in the early 1900s and some of the battles got really intense so there might have been an intense fight between 2, or even all 3, parties involved and one of them struck a deadly blow to Ivan. Tolis in particular is stated to be a very disciplined and competent combatant so I’m definitely leaning more towards the idea that in the heat of the battle, Tolis either particular or completely decapitated Ivan.

A human attacked Ivan during one of the many revolutions that occurred in Russia’s history.

I specifically think Ivan was attacked during the attack knows as “Bloody Sunday”(St. Petersburg January 22, 1905). We see time and time again in the anime and Manga, especially with Russia, that nations have to follow their bosses orders to the letter even if they personally don’t agree with what they’re bosses are doing. He was most likely ordered to join the imperial forces and shoot his citizens, some of whom did try to fight back before dying. I don’t think they fought back enough to go too deep, but I do think the human who attacked him most likely picked up some scrap metal and at the very least cut through his exterior and anterior jugular veins.

He’s done it to himself…multiple times

You don’t live through some dark times and come out unscathed. His history has canonically caused psychological damage to Ivan’s psyche that persists into modern day. It’s very likely that living through so much traumatic history would leave him with depression and PTSD at minimum. He has more than likely tried, on multiple occasions, to end his suffering by attempting to take his own life but has never succeeded because of his immortality.

Whatever the cause, I definitely think it’s caused physical issues such as his voice being as high pitched and airy as it is. He sounds very young and childish, as if his vocal cords didn’t develop properly once he hit puberty. He’s capable of deepening his voice but he has to actively force it, such as when he’s mad and wants to sound intimidating/threatening or during character songs when his voice slips into a deeper tone when he’s actively forcing his voice. When he laughs it’s a very airy “ufufuf” sound. That might also be due to vocal damage and if he’s ever in a situation where he’s laughing so hard, he’s holding his sides, he’ll most likely have an eerily silent laugh where he only makes noise when his trying to take air into his lungs. I also imagine neck is very sensitive and he doesn’t allow people to touch him there unless he absolutely trusts them with his entire being. Swallowing might also be a problem for Ivan, especially if he’s eating very hot food.

Of course he also has some self esteem issues because of his neck scar. Looking at it makes him feel ashamed because it’s a reminder that he was weak enough to let someone hurt him. It’s also a reminder that people didn’t like or trust him in the past so he thinks that’s still true. It’s a scar that reminds him of all that he has suffered and of all the people who have hurt him, it’s a reminder that he’s survived over 1,000 years of hell on earth.

#hetalia #aph Russia #hws Russia #Ivan Braginsky #aph lithuania #hws lithuania #tolys laurinaitis #aph poland #hws poland #feliks łukasiewicz #aph mongolia #hws mongolia #cw: decapitation #cw: attempted suicide #cw: war #cw: historical violence #Ivan’s really gone through some shit

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paralyze-fic · 1 year

Text

Paralyze.

Chapter 10

After the day of our first fight, Bakugou and I got kinda closer to each other. He had made me go to his house every day this past week, and we were now in that café to study the three of us together. Whenever he would hit Kirishima with a roll of paper it would make me chuckle and apologize to the poor waiters, thankfully they didn't kick us out because some people recognized us from the Sports Festival and asked us for pictures or autographs.

Even if Bakugou wasn't too cooperative, it wasn't like somebody wanted to get close to him.

The study went by quite easily for me, Bakugou just explained me some things and gave me his notes so I could study them, Kirishima was another story and poor Bakugou was having a hard time not blowing his face off. This was now our last day of studying and Bakugou rested his body on his seat, exhausted, while Kirishima was frantically writing the answers to a mini-test Bakugou gave him. I looked at the blonde, leaving the notes I was studying aside.

"You okay?" He groaned and turned his head towards me.

"I'm fine. Just kinda glad you're not as dumb," at the end of his sentence, he pointed at the redhead across from us.

My eyes traveled back to the notes I was reading and closed the notebook. "Do you want something to cheer you up?" Without me actually wanting to, my mouth said. He opened his eyes and stared at me for a few seconds, before showing me an evil smirk.

But is that... blush? I'm sure his cheeks are slightly pinker than before...

"We'll fight again, and if you lose, you have to buy me the most spicy curry." I scoffed and moved my attention to his notes once again.

"As you wish."

//////

"I win, again." My eyes were looking at a defeated Bakugou panting on the ground. He was sweating and his breath was horribly uneven, I was getting a bit worried. "Bakugou... are you okay?" I walked to him and touched his shoulder, but he smacked my hand away.

"I'm fine! One more... I'll win this time, one more time..." he tried to stand up, but his legs failed him.

"You are not fine..." I muttered and got on my knees in front of him, "Let me help you." This time when I touched him he didn't attempt to push me away, instead he grabbed onto me as I lift him. "Can you walk?" After some seconds of waiting, he shook his head no and I sighed.

Well, this would look a bit weird.

I bent down my body and hook my arm under his legs, then I lift him bridal style. Now this was the weird part, Bakugou didn't try to push or punch me for carrying him, actually his grip tightened on my t-shirt and hid his face on my neck.

That caused my heart to thump aggressively against my chest, my body to shiver and my face to heat up.

The past few days I spent with Bakugou were really nice, but that also made me develop a... soft spot for him? Basically, I had a bit of a crush on him, but I didn't want to get my hopes up, but here he goes, being all cute and shit.

I walked inside his house, and his mother was there, as soon as I stepped in, she turned to us and squealed in a high-pitched voice.

"I have to take a picture of this! Masaru, get the camera!" Mitsuki ran toward us and pushed me to sit on their couch, I tried to stand up so I could take Bakugou to his room, but when I looked down at him I noticed his eyes closed and steady breath.

Did he fall asleep? So cute!

I was extremely sure I would have had hearts instead of eyes while I stared at his peaceful face. But when I snapped out of my trance, I heard multiple camera noises and flashes. I looked at Mitsuki and Masaru, the man seemed like he was feeling pity for me and that made me blush.

My grip tightened on Bakugou and I stood up abruptly, rushing to the stairs while trying not to trip. I could hear Mitsuki's complaints about wanting more photos, but I ignored her. When I got to his room it was a bit difficult to open the door but I managed, with my foot I closed it behind me and went to lay Bakugou on his bed.

I debated about if I should or shouldn't wake him up... maybe I should, he was all sweaty and it would be uncomfortable to sleep like that. I sat by his side and shook his shoulder.

"Bakugou..." I shook him some more, "Bakugou, wake up," he didn't react at all. "Maybe I should just leave. It's still early, he would wake up on his own." I stood up and grabbed my bag, which contained my previous change of clothes, the ones that were also sweaty and dirty. (If you are confused; you trained that morning, studied at the cafe, and trained again)

I opened his bedroom door and glanced at him.

"Goodnight, Katsuki."

//////

My eyes were wide and I felt my cheeks on fire. I couldn't take my eyes off the pictures sent to me by Mitsuki.

She had convinced me to give her my number a few days ago, and I wasn't sure if I regretted that decision, because she had sent me all of the pictures she took of Bakugou and me this afternoon. I could clearly see his face in some of them, while some other showed more the blush on my face and I got embarrassed.

Mrs.Bakugou;

I hope you like them, (M/n)!

Have a good night.

I stared at the pictures a bit more and decided to set my favourite one as my wallpaper. Yes, I would get a bit embarrassed every time I would turn on my phone, but it would be fine as long as nobody else sees it, right?

;I do like them, Mitsuki. Thank you.

;Good night to both of you.

A sigh escaped my lips as I set my phone on my nightstand and put it to charge. My body was tired and my mind was exhausted... I just wanted to sleep forever, but I still had school tomorrow. I closed my eyes and before I realized it, I fell asleep.

#paralyze fic #bakugou katsuki fanfic #bakugou x male #bakugou x male reader #male reader #reader insert #x reader

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cosmicjoke · 1 year

Text

Ahh, bad-ass Thorfinn reappears! Reading the first five chapters of “War in the Baltic”, and I take back all my stated fears of “Vinland Saga” delving into the realm on easy solutions. I worried after the culmination of the confrontation with Canute that all of Thorfinn’s encounters would be similarly, easily resolved, but boy was I wrong. I should have known better, given the pedigree of story telling from Yukimura through the vast majority of this series.

Hild’s presence with Thorfinn and his party continues to be a wonderful parallel, with her tagging along and, unconsciously I think, she’s helped already multiple times to protect Throfinn’s life, the same way Thorfinn did for Askeladd, under the belief that they were doing so because it had to be them who delivered the killing blow. We again see Thorfinn in Askeladd’s own position, with Hild snapping at him that she doesn’t take orders from him, the same way Thorfinn often snapped at Askeladd. Thorfinn, though, unlike Askeladd, views himself as beholden to Hild and is willing to give up his life to her without struggle once he’s made amends for his past killing.

The highlight of these chapters is definitely just watching Thorfinn kick ass though. It’s been a long time since we really got to see him unload his abilities on anyone, and I was happy to see he still has some of his old fight and spirit left in him. That’s a part of him, his ability and talent to fight, an essential part, I would say, and while I understand he’s felt a need for self-sacrifice for the past, five years, born largely from his sense of guilt and remorse, I really love to see him regain some of his old spark and start to value his life more, to fight and defend himself more, and not just stand there and let himself be killed, or beaten. I like seeing Thorfinn regain some self-respect. That’s growth too. To forgive himself enough to fight for himself. And though I don’t think he’s quite there yet, to the point of valuing his own life enough to fight for it (his continued statement that he’ll let Hild kill him once he’s made amends proof of that), I hope to see him get there. He’s a good person, and doesn’t deserve to die, or even be mistreated. Of course, Thorfinn was really fighting here to protect the villagers, which was amazing to see too, and amazing character development. To see this kid who went from aiding the raid’s of Askeladd’s band on villages, to now saving villages which are under attack, is pretty incredible. The little girl calling Thorfinn a “good guy” and cheering him on to save them all was incredibly heartwarming.

This brings up another parallel, this one with his father, Thors. Even as Thorfinn comes out into the open and abandons his escape plans from the Jomsvikings to save the villagers from them, he only has to do so in the first place because his presence on the island is what drew them there. Just like Thor’s attempt to escape his past as a warrior brought him to Iceland, which eventually lead Floki to the island, and put the lives of the villagers there under threat, along with everything that transpired after, with Thorfinn himself being swept up into a life of battle and violence, it’s now Thorfinn who, in his attempt to escape his life as a warrior, is being followed and pursued by that past. That it’s Floki again who is chasing after him and not allowing him the life of peace he seeks makes the parallel with Thors all the greater. The scene with the little girl running up to Thorfinn and trying to give him the seashell necklace, only for her mother to pull her away and cower in fear before Thorfinn, was heartbreaking. Thorfinn, just like his father, is a genuinely good and kind man, but his life of violence continues to haunt him and continually tries to pull him back, again, the same as Thors.

I’m super excited to continue on now, and see what takes place. With the request from the two warriors from Vagn’s group to join them in overthrowing Flokie, and them insisting to Thorfinn that he can’t live among the sheep, because he has wolf’s blood running through his veins, and with that seemingly being true, as everywhere he goes, violence and confrontation follows after him, on top of the looming possibility of Thorfinn finding out that Floki was, ultimately, the one really responsible for Thor’s death, things are obviously far from seeing any easy solutions. I’m super stoked!

#Vinland Saga #Thorfinn

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nonosenovember · 1 year

Text

Thinking about transformations and how to implement them. It seems worth noting how the powers of transformations relate to their original, narrative use:

-Kaioken is power at a price. It allows our hero to succeed, but at a cost and a risk. Its function is to raise the stakes

-Super Saiyan is just flat out useful on all fronts. There really isn't much of a cost to Super Saiyan, and that's because it represents a moment of sudden, notable character growth. Goku will never be the same after achieving this transformation for the first time; he has now come to terms with his heritage and has learned to use that destructive power and rage in a positive, beneficial way. It represents the climax of an ongoing story.

-Super Saiyan 2 functions the exact same way for Gohan, colored by how his issues and story arc differ from Goku's. Here, it is not so much heritage that he is coming to terms with, but rather his own capacity for violence.

-Super Saiyan 3 is completely different! Dragon Ball's arcs are often a long series of escalations. They involve many attempts by multiple characters to overcome the villain, and they often strike significant blows before ultimately failing. Super Saiyan 3 is one such blow in the middle of the escalation chain. Super Saiyan 3 is there to fail. Interestingly, it has a significant downside (quickly burning through energy) which makes it similar to ultra Saiyan/ Super Saiyan grade 2/3/Super Vegeta, which serve similar narrative purposes.

-Super Saiyan God is an interesting one, in that, while it does represent a change in the characters who attain it, it is the start of the change, rather than its conclusion. When Goku attains Super Saiyan God, we have the feeling that he has taken his first step into a new world.

Villain transformations usually aren't about character development in the same way as hero transformations. Rather, they are about raising stakes and setting up insurmountable odds.

-Every Frieza transformation is like "oh, you thought things were bad? They are so so so much worse than you suspected."

-Cell's transformations are slightly more interesting in that they set up a mechanic that guides the conflict. In the Frieza saga, the search for the dragon balls gives the characters things to do beyond punch each other: strategies, skirmishes, stealth, etc. It makes things interesting, and causes characters' different motivations to clash. Cell's attempts to absorb the androids work similarly.

However, I would add that there's definitely unexplored potential for villain transformations to reveal character. Especially if that villain is a tragic one. But we've had precious few of those in Dragon Ball.

Was there a point to all this? Just thinking out loud I suppose... And trying to figure out how I can use this.

I guess the conclusion is... If you're inventing a new transformation, don't just consider its look and powers. Consider what the narrative purpose of the transformation is, and let that inform how it manifests.

#dragon ball #dbz #brainstorming #game design

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fahrni · 2 years

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Saturday Morning Coffee

My first cup of coffee is poured and cooling a bit, our old kitty — Khloe — is in my lap, and I’m sat in my writing spot at the end of the couch nearest the front window. It’s cloudy and raining and the wind is blowing. I’m not sure if it’s remnants of Ian yet or just a regular storm. Guess we’ll find out. 🌧️

CNN: “Ian slammed into southwest Florida as a severe Category 4 hurricane Wednesday, packing sustained winds of 150 mph. Officials believe the death toll of at least 45 people is likely to climb in the coming days as searchers access areas that had been blocked by debris and floodwaters.”

What a tragic week for Floridians. So many folks displaced and damage beyond belief. Homes and businesses wiped completely off the map, land reclaimed by sand. And the there is the human toll. 😢

Take care my Florida friends. ❤️

Travel Radar: “There have been multiple reports of strange noises coming from American Airlines in recent weeks that neither the passengers nor crew members could explain. Some passengers have been airing their confusion across social media.”

It’s the perfect time of the year to have mysterious moaning sounds coming out of the speaker system on a flight.

It doesn’t sound like an equipment failure to me. I’m going with ghosts. 👻

Abhorrent. And yet, I’m not surprised at all. When ads become more algorithmic, people find fraudulent ways to cheat and make more money. The endgame: algorithmic podcast ads, which already degrade the listener experience, get further devalued and the entire industry loses. https://t.co/iCFv7fbP14

— Marco Arment (@marcoarment) September 29, 2022

When the big players figure out they can automate a money making machine they have to get involved and screw everything up.

Luckily we still have great Indie Podcasts to listen to.

TechCrunch: “Now, a Spanish startup called Penpot — which is taking a new approach to design collaboration through an open source platform that brings designers and developers into the mix simultaneously — says that it’s been seeing a huge amount of adoption since the Figma deal.”

I happens across Penpot a month or so before the Adobe purchase of Figma. It’s really nice and if you’re looking for a Figma alternative you might want to give it a look.

Bleacher Report: “Odell Beckham Jr. questioned why all NFL stadiums don’t feature grass fields after former New York Giants teammate Sterling Shepard suffered a non-contact knee injury on the MetLife Stadium turf on Monday night.”

This is not the first time turf has become controversial. I remember back in the 70’s or 80’s this being a topic of conversation. That was before this new wave of turf became a thing.

I’ve always been a fan of grass fields. Bring them back to every stadium you possibly can. I want to see some filthy uniforms.

Apple Newsroom: “Amid the tools used by archaeologists for centuries — trowels, buckets, brushes, and pickaxes — there’s a new piece of equipment: iPad Pro.”

I am so here for this. Seeing tools used in ways you never expected is always such a joy for the developer.

Congratulations to Top Hatch, the makers of Concepts, and my friend Marc Palmer who is a developer on the engineering team! 👍🏼

Politico: “A federal judge delivered a blistering rebuke of Republican Party leaders Tuesday for what she said was a cynical attempt to stoke false claims of election fraud of the kind that fueled the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol.”

I really wish Republican leaders weren’t so power hungry and had the guts to all come out against TFG.

Here’s hoping one of the many troubles TFG has leads to conviction and elimination from running for public office. 🤞🏼

9to5Mac: “This week, a new Instagram client called “OG App” caught the attention of the internet as it promised a better Instagram experience without advertisements or content suggestions from people you don’t know. The app seemed too good to be true, but it has now been taken down – not by Meta, but by Apple.”

If you’re surprised by this, don’t be. Instagram cut off developers long ago. At one time there were plenty of great Instagram clients, even for iPad!

It’s a closed platform. The best we can hope for is alternate services — like Glass — to catch on and take a big share of Instagrams user base.

The digital protest art being created in Iran–much of it anonymously–has been absolutely brilliant. pic.twitter.com/Q1MCJAhYxg

— Dr. Shiva Balaghi (@SBalaghi) September 30, 2022

Of course the United States, Britain, and Ukraine aren’t the only countries in complete disarray. Iran is having another revolution. Women are coming out in force to demand equal rights and an end to its totalitarian regime.

Yahoo Sports: “Again, if you don’t like the “White Bengal” look with the black stripes — which included the debut of the white helmet with black stripes on Thursday night — then it’ll be a while before you find an NFL uniform you like.”

I loved the white out uniforms worn by the Bengals Thursday night. Being a Bears fan I’m really looking forward to seeing the new orange helmets the Bears will be wearing on special occasions this year.

I kind of wish they’d go orange helmets with their navy blue color rush uniform but they’re not going that direction

Hayseed Blog: “I’m happy to announce a new Stream release. Version 1.3 is a minor release with one new feature and two bug fixes.”

I wish I could turn this little project into my full time gig. Heck, I’d be super happy with a few hundred bucks a month! 🤣

That aside I am proud of my little labor of love and hope you’ll give it a look.

Getting this version out the door has allowed me to get back to the Max version. It’s slow going since this is my first real Mac app but I do hope to ship it at some point. 😄

Time for my third cup. ☕️

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bbcworldnewstoday · 2 years

Text

Bam! NASA spacecraft crashes into asteroid in test of defense technology

This illustration made available by Johns Hopkins APL and NASA depicts NASA's DART probe, foreground right, and Italian Space Agency's (ASI) LICIACube, bottom right, at the Didymos system before impact with the asteroid Dimorphos, left. (Steve Gribben/Johns Hopkins APL/NASA via AP) CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. — A NASA spacecraft rammed an asteroid at blistering speed Monday in an unprecedented dress rehearsal for the day a killer rock menaces Earth. The galactic slam occurred at a harmless asteroid 7 million miles away, with the spacecraft named Dart plowing into the space rock at 14,000 mph. Scientists expected the impact to carve out a crater, hurl streams of rocks and dirt into space and, most importantly, alter the asteroid’s orbit. “We have impact!” Mission Control’s Elena Adams announced, jumping up and down and thrusting her arms skyward. Telescopes around the world and in space aimed at the same point in the sky to capture the spectacle. Though the impact was immediately obvious — Dart’s radio signal abruptly ceased — it will be days or even weeks to determine how much the asteroid’s path was changed. The $325 million mission was the first attempt to shift the position of an asteroid or any other natural object in space. “We’re embarking on a new era of humankind,” said NASA’s Lori Glaze, planetary science division director. Earlier in the day, NASA Administrator Bill Nelson reminded people via Twitter that, “No, this is not a movie plot.” He added in a prerecorded video: “We’ve all seen it on movies like ‘Armageddon,’ but the real-life stakes are high.” Monday’s target: a 525-foot asteroid named Dimorphos. It’s actually a moonlet of Didymos, Greek for twin, a fast-spinning asteroid five times bigger that flung off the material that formed the junior partner. The pair have been orbiting the sun for eons without threatening Earth, making them ideal save-the-world test candidates. Launched last November, the vending machine-size Dart — short for Double Asteroid Redirection Test — navigated to its target using new technology developed by Johns Hopkins University’s Applied Physics Laboratory, the spacecraft builder and mission manager. Dart’s on-board camera, a key part of this smart navigation system, caught sight of Dimorphos barely an hour before impact. “Woo hoo,” exclaimed Adams, a mission systems engineer at Johns Hopkins. “We’re seeing Dimorphos, so wonderful, wonderful.” In this image made from a NASA livestream, the Double Asteroid Redirection Test spacecraft crashes into an asteroid on Monday, Sept. 26, 2022. (ASI/NASA via AP) With an image beaming back to Earth every second, Adams and other ground controllers in Laurel, Maryland, watched with growing excitement as Dimorphos loomed larger and larger in the field of view alongside its bigger companion. Within minutes, Dimorphos was alone in the pictures; it looked like a giant gray lemon, but with boulders and rubble on the surface. The last image froze on the screen as the radio transmission ended. Flight controllers cheered, hugged one another and exchanged high fives. A mini satellite followed a few minutes behind to take photos of the impact. The Italian Cubesat was released from Dart two weeks ago. Scientists insisted Dart would not shatter Dimorphos. The spacecraft packed a scant 1,260 pounds, compared with the asteroid’s 11 billion pounds. But that should be plenty to shrink its 11-hour, 55-minute orbit around Didymos. The impact should pare 10 minutes off that, but telescopes will need anywhere from a few days to nearly a month to verify the new orbit. The anticipated orbital shift of 1% might not sound like much, scientists noted. But they stressed it would amount to a significant change over years. Planetary defense experts prefer nudging a threatening asteroid or comet out of the way, given enough lead time, rather than blowing it up and creating multiple pieces that could rain down on Earth. Multiple impactors might be needed for big space rocks or a combination of impactors and so-called gravity tractors, not-yet-invented devices that would use their own gravity to pull an asteroid into a safer orbit. “The dinosaurs didn’t have a space program to help them know what was coming, but we do,” NASA’s senior climate adviser Katherine Calvin said, referring to the mass extinction 66 million years ago believed to have been caused by a major asteroid impact, volcanic eruptions or both. The non-profit B612 Foundation, dedicated to protecting Earth from asteroid strikes, has been pushing for impact tests like Dart since its founding by astronauts and physicists 20 years ago. Monday’s feat aside, the world must do a better job of identifying the countless space rocks lurking out there, warned the foundation’s executive director, Ed Lu, a former astronaut. Significantly less than half of the estimated 25,000 near-Earth objects in the deadly 460-foot range have been discovered, according to NASA. And fewer than 1% of the millions of smaller asteroids, capable of widespread injuries, are known. The Vera Rubin Observatory, nearing completion in Chile by the National Science Foundation and U.S. Energy Department, promises to revolutionize the field of asteroid discovery, Lu noted. Finding and tracking asteroids, “That’s still the name of the game here. That’s the thing that has to happen in order to protect the Earth,” he said. Read the full article

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queenoftheworldisdead · 3 years

Note

Could you maybe write something with dark dark Steve who has a huge size kink and crying kink and loves to humiliate?

School Days

Note: sorry it took so long. been kinda down. also hope i did OK with humiliation.

Summary: Co-worker makes you feel uncomfortable.

Warning: 18+Only, short reader, size kink, crying kink, humiliation kink, non consent, forced fingering and cock warming i think

Dark Coach Steve x Short Teacher Reader

📚

You had always had a love of teaching. Growing up your friends would always groan when it was your turn to pick what to play, because you always chose to play school.

You knew exactly what you wanted to do when you got to college. You wanted to shape young minds. It was fascinating watching them grow and learn right before your very eyes.

Shelby elementary hired you two years after you received all of your certificates. Replacing their beloved Mrs.Pepper Potts after she moved out of town with her husband.

You taught first graders. You preferred teaching the lower grades. The higher grades were a bit difficult. Competing for attention when most of the students where dealing with raging hormones proved an exhausting endeavor. Your short stature became a reoccurring issue too. During your student teacher days you realized the taller they got the more they seemed to not take you seriously.

At least working with the lower grades you were less likely to be confused as a student. You had lost track of how many times you were stopped in the hall by a colleague. With the lower grades you towered over your class and commanded respect with little effort.

📚

You felt exhausted. Your first parent teacher meeting was over. It was endearing and encouraging that so many parents had so many concerns about the development of their little ones. But their critiques on your credentials didn't fail to strike a nerve, an issue new teachers faced all the time. You smiled through it as you normally did. Letting them have their back handed remarks as you answered and waited out the clock.

When it was all over you needed a drink. You cleared up the mess they left for you, a preview of what to expect from their spawn.

When everything was in its place you tackled the blackboard. Taking out your stool you stood on tip toes erasing. You had the bright idea of outlining your curriculum on the board for all the parents to view. It was hard getting it all on the massive board, but with your step stool you got as high as you could go.

"Hey! Whoa you know that's dangerous." A voice rushed to your side as your stool tilted.

"Are you OK little one?" he asked helping you down.

God he's tall. You barely came eye to eye with his chest. You tensed in his arms and when he realized his mistake he released you.

"Oh sorry" he rubbed the back of his head slightly embarrassed. "I'm Steve Rogers." He reached out a hand for you to shake. You took it and introduced yourself. His firm grip swallowed your hand, when he squeezed you held in the hurt from the pressure.

Steve's presence was intimidating despite the smile he wore. When he released your hand, you took as step back, but he stepped forward.

He is just a close talker. Don't over analyze.

"Sorry again with your clothes I just assumed you were..." He motioned at your clothing.

Taking inspiration from Ms Frizz, your favorite animated teacher, you always wore colorful puffy skirts that depicted various things related to education or fairy tails. The look kept the attention of the youngsters, but it certainly didn't look childish.

"It's OK, but I am afraid you are a bit late for the meeting."

Spinning away you move to the other side of your desk to give yourself more space. "If you wouldn't mind filling in your information, encase of emergencies or special needs. I know you probably filled it out for the front office, but I like to have my own copy." You explained as you handed him a pen and the piece of construction paper with the other parents info.

He took it and filled it out. "I just erased the curriculum, but I can email you a copy."

"Did you also used to teach at Camdien?" Steve inquired, bending over your desk as he wrote. While you waited you packed up your belongings.

"Um yes I was a student teacher there. Did you have a child there too?"

"I coached there actually. Well was." He rose and approached you. Slipping your purse straps on your shoulder, you tried to remember if you seen his face before. You didn't recognize it. As striking as he was you doubted you would forget it.

But the athletic department lived in a world separate from the teachers. Their multiple championships brought in funding that went to their brand new athletic facility. The highly coveted building allowed them to live above the peasant class of the faculty. You had even heard a nonsensical rumor that they even had a Starbucks and onsite masseuse.

When he handed it back you reached out, but Steve pulled the paper just out of reach. Hovering it over your head like a bully playing keep away. You huff and frown after two attempts. You were not a child and would not be treated as such. Pursing your lips you made a move to leave. You would just go through the admin office to get the information.

"Aw don't pout, but I must say you do look adorable when you do." He smiled down at you as he blocked your retreat. His wholesome grin did not match the darkness in his eyes. There was a disconnect somewhere. You felt like a mouse before a lion. Were the other teachers like this? You were so eager to get started working you did little research in the school that so swiftly hired you. "Here you go."

Snatching the paper away you say, "thank you." It sounded slightly annoyed, but you did your best to choke down the edge.

Unhooking the lip of your bag you placed it with the others as his shadow clouded you. Ignoring it you side step him.

"Yeah I remember. I used to see you at Camdien." Steve recalled, blocking you once more. You stopped just short of bumping into him as you closed your bag. "Cute little thing, roaming the halls." Steve informed you, stepping closer once more, making you take a step back. The alarm bells blared in your head at that comment.

"Boy wasn't I relieved I wasn't crossing the line with all the thoughts I had." He chuckled as your back hit the chalkboard. You had to strain your neck to look him in the eye this close.

The principal was making his rounds soon. He wouldn't try anything right?

"Mr. Rogers-"

"Coach" he interrupted. He didn't touch you but that fact gave you very little relief. You felt your nails dig into your palm as you gripped the thin strap of your bag. Your arm the only barrier between you two. "Just call me Coach."

"Rogers!" Your saving grace, Principal Barnes, exclaimed from the door. Steve's body blocked you from James. "There you are. Nice to see your getting to know your colleagues."

"Yeah, just sharing stories from Camdien" Steve stepped aside to greet Principal James. His hand landed on the top of your head, messing your hair as he patted you playfully like a dog. You swallowed the discomfort as he moved to talk to James. You gathered the rest of your things as they focused their attention on each other.

"Oh yeah I forgot you both came from their."

You took that opportunity to make your exit. Walking fast mumbling a 'goodnight,' you bolted toward the door. They replied back, but you ignored it, allowing their chatter to fade the further down the hall you got.

📚

The first week of school was hectic. Lost students, late students, little accidents here and there, it ran the gambit. But nothing worried you more than P.E. period.

Steve was listed as your classes gym teacher and made the drop-off a chore. It surprised you how increasingly inappropriate he was becoming. Always stretching out your name flirtatiously in front of the children causing them to taunt you with 'OOO's, and pepper you with questions about the nonexistent relationship until you departed.

They stayed in line as you approached the double doors that led to the gymnasium. He was there, dressed in his sweat pants, gym shirt and the whistle dangled from his lips.

As you ushered them inside he caught site of you as he wrangled another group and smirked. It was unnerving especially when your students egged him on by making kissy noises loudly when they noticed him too. On one occasion he sent a note with one of your students asking you out. You ignored it.

You should've reported him you know, but what would they say 'Oh he was just being friendly' or any number of things to justify his behavior. You'd been in enough situations to know without evidence that met their standards nothing would happen.

📚

In the teachers lounge Steve made his presence known. You stared at your custom coffee mug as it sat high on the edge of the third shelf. You had half a mind to take and break his, as it taunted you from the first. You were growing more and more tired of his antics. This wasn't the first time and you knew it wouldn't be the last.

Two arms planted themselves on either side of you as something rested on your head.

It was him you knew it. Who else would it be?

"Need some help little one?" He hummed.

"God damn it Steve get off me" you barked You elbowed him, but the mountain of a man didn't budge.

"No need to be nasty."

You felt him push you into the counter, crushing you against it as he reached for your cup on the high shelf.

"Here you go" he said placing it daintily in front of you.

Calm down don't blow your lid he is doing this to fuck with you.

"Shouldn't you be watching my class?" You asked as you waited for him to move out of your way.

"Student teacher got me covered. You remember what that's like? Give them the work while we teachers kick back and relax."

He backed away allowing you to get the coffee, but stayed glued to your side. You ignored him, pulling out your phone and flopped on the couch, waiting for gym time to end.

Steve of course sat next to you crowding you into the corner. He boldly placed a hand on your thigh, you brushed it off, cursing at him to 'go away'. If you got up he would only follow so you crossed your legs and leaned into the arm of the couch. Don't let him get to you.

Steve stretched out his arm on the back of the couch. Even sitting next to you he towered over you. His arm wrapped around your shoulder, pulling you in snugly. Your head resting against his tone chest. "God your so adorable."

"Steve!" you almost shriek at him as his other hand slyly crept under your skirt. "Jesus Christ what the hell is wrong with you."

You try to stand suddenly, but get jerked back down. Landing in the same awkward situation as before.

"Fuck you let me go" you hissed at him. He only chuckled as you tried to stop his hand from advancing up your skirt again. You became panicked the further he got.

Clamping your thighs tightly together as he wedged between your crossed legs. Your eyes shifted to the door before you, the couch sat across from the only entrance. If anyone came in they surely would be under the wrong assumptions.

His arm refused to budge as you attempted to pry him away. Steve was nothing but muscle, struggling was getting you no where, each shift pressed him hard against your sensitive area.

📚

"You know I've been nothing, but nice to you" Steve sounded disappointed.

"Stop please" you sounded panicked and desperate. Your nails dug into his arm as you tried to fight back an ache that taunted you as he teased.

"But you always give me attitude." He stated casually.

You slapped him. The sound loud in the empty room. Your eyes blurred with tears of frustration. Your hit did nothing, only leaving his cheek red, but from the smile on his face he liked it.

"And violent too. Hope you don't act that way around your class" he tsked while poking hard at the growing wet spot. You felt your spine curve and breath become heavier, your toes curled in your shoes as he increased his friction.

"Oh look at you. You like that don't you" he teased rubbing circles after noticing the tension in your legs relax. You cocked back to slap him again, but stopped when you felt his other hand at the back of your neck. It squeezed softly, but it was a warning nonetheless. You felt defeated. Not only was Steve bigger than you, he was stronger. Tears of frustration finally fell as you lowered your hand and let him do as he pleased.

"God your even cuter when you cry." He preened. "Tell you what. Since we don't have that much time....Kiss me and I will stop." You bristled as you felt him peel your panties to the side.

He didn't wait for your reply. Steve crashed his lips on to yours without warning. You flinched expecting pain, but it was soft. It was so tender that with anyone else they would given and close their eyes, accept it, but you couldn't.

"Stop..Steve.. Please" You panted over his lips, pushing at his chest as his fingers pushed into you. He didn't stop, the kiss only embolden him to go further. You whimpered and moaned as he took from you.

"Give me your panties" he asked pulling away from you, but his fingers still curled inside. "You promised you'd stop" you remind him, wiping away tears.

He wasn't going to relent, you could tell by the determination in his eyes. You felt exposed and embarrassed. Anyone could walk in at any moment and he knew it. He would probably get a slap on the wrist while you would need to find employment else where to escape the shame.

"I promise this time" he said lowly. "No tricks."

Swallowing your pride you lifted in your seat, he moved just enough to let the fabric pass. Rolling them down your knees quickly you hand them over. His hands slipped from you as you pass it. He held them up to the light and examined the wetness he created. Wiping away tears, you stood and bolted toward the door, but stopped when Steve whistled loudly.

"I think you forgot something."

You turned to find him pointing at your discarded mug.

"If you leave it, I leave this in it", he waved your shame in the air.

"Don't forget to wash it....don't want it to leave a stain" he ordered from the couch. You walked back on edge. Snatching the mug from the other side of the table. You rushed to the sink and rinsed your cup. More tears fell as you felt the wetness between your legs. The mirror mounted above the sink allowed you to examine yourself. Your mascara bled a bit and lipstick smeared, but nothing that couldn't be fixed with a dab of a napkin.

You swore to never step foot in the lounge ever again. If you needed to eat you would do it in your car or at your desk. This was supposed to be a magical time for you, but with Steve it had turned into a nightmare.

You sniffed as you blinked away the tears, forcing yourself to stop crying. Gym time was almost over and you needed to pull yourself together and collect your class.

"You know how often I wonder about you" Steve said rising from the couch, you watched him carefully from the mirror. You fumbled your mug, the water splashing back at you.

"Steve you promised" you said meekly, utterly defeated. He stared at you through the mirror, you felt his eyes watch your discomfort as you picked up the cup.

"What would the parents think if they knew their kids teacher walks around the class with no panties on" he tutted. You hung your head low and noticed your panties balled up in his hand as he rested it on the counter.

"I also wonder" He said pressing you into the sink. You felt his resolve through his sweat pants. "Do you fit?"

Fit?

Then it became clear. You felt his cock against your backside. You tried frantically to flea, but Steve caught you by the neck.

"I'm willing to bet you can't even fit half of me inside" he whispered in your ear as he bent you over the sink, crushing. "If I'm wrong I will let you go." Your eyes rounded as he hauled up your skirt. You whimpered as the cool air of the staff room tickled your exposed rear.

Steve was really going to fuck you in the staff room. These walls were paper thin and he knew it. Your head swirled in panic as you pleaded with him to stop. He only chuckled and shimmied down his sweat pants as you swatted back at him.

He angled and aligned himself as you sobbed. The tip slipped through your wet thighs, finding the target of its need.

You choked down a guttural moan as he breathed out 'good girl'. He watched your face as every inch stretched through your insides.

"Its is too much" you gasped out, trembling from the pressure, dancing on your tip toes as you adjusted around him.

"Its all inside" he praised the accomplishment. Forcing you to look at the mirror. "You fit me so good...see."

The mirror reflected your assault to your horror. "All cute holding me inside, taking everything I got" he said while stretching you.

Shooting pains radiated from your core as sharp breaths escaped you.

"Look at you" he taunted "coming apart just for me.... "

You heard the door to the room open and close quickly as you panted wildly. Steve didn't pull out, unabashed, letting whomever take in his pale ass as he continued to stuff you.

You didn't know who saw you, you only hoped his massive body hid you and your shame.

📚

#dark steve x reader #dark steve x black reader #dark!steve x reader #dark!steve x black!reader #black writer

1K notes · View notes

makeste · 3 years

Text

“but I thought about how I needed to say this”

a.k.a. yet another meta dissection of The Apology. I actually wrote most of this up on Friday night based on the original Japanese (@pikahlua has an excellent translation up here, and I also used @hanashimas’ translations as a reference as well), but I wanted to wait until the official release, though that turned out to be a mixed bag to say the least lol.

I would also recommend reading @pikahlua and @class1akids’ breakdowns of this scene (here and here, respectively), because they are excellent, and because if any scene deserves to have as many meta breakdowns written about it as possible, it’s this one.

anyway so here goes.

Caleb did a more accurate job with this than the fanscan, even if he did try his best to take us out of the seriousness of the moment by throwing in that swiss cheese line lol. anyway so there are two things I want to talk about here. the first is the line about Izuku not remembering, which I thought was a nice touch. of course he doesn’t remember what Kacchan said back then. he wasn’t exactly in the soundest emotional state after seeing one of the people he cares about most taking a near-fatal blow that was meant for him. I’d be shocked if he remembers anything about the aftermath (including the way he flew into a mindless rage afterwards) right up until the point when he entered the OFA Interstellar Party Void with Tomura. anyway, so I thought that was a nice callback.

and speaking of emotional states, the other thing I wanted to talk about is the part that Caleb got right which the fan scanlation didn’t. “but I had more to say.” in other words, “stop trying to win on your own” wasn’t just a one-liner; it was meant to be the beginning of a much longer speech. “there were other things that I needed to say.”

like, can we just stop and talk about that for a second. because basically what this means is that in that instant, when Kacchan pushed Deku out of the way and got impaled, his one and only thought was that he needed to apologize to Deku. his life was presumably flashing before his eyes, he had no idea if he was going to survive or not, and the only thing on his mind was how urgently he needed to make things right with his former childhood friend.

moving on!

so I have a confession to make, which is that I am relieved to see Katsuki describing this as the reason why he bullied Deku, as opposed to Horikoshi trying to retcon it into some sort of “secretly he was just trying to protect him and keep him out of harm’s way because he was worried” thing, which ngl would not have gelled very well with me. the thing is that I’m really not a fan of the whole “Kacchan Did Nothing Wrong” mentality that some fans seem to have. like, I have seen all sorts of convoluted attempts to find excuses for Katsuki’s shitty behavior, but in my view those attempts undermine what I love about his character in the first place. Katsuki is such a great character specifically because he is not perfect. his redemption arc is so compelling because he was such a giant asshole at the start. he was completely at fault, and he acknowledges this, and takes full responsibility for it. and that is fucking fantastic.

his arc is so great because it doesn’t rely on garnering sympathy by giving him a Tragic Past, or by trying to foist the blame for his behavior over on someone else. it’s an arc that acknowledges that redemption isn’t something you achieve by making people feel sorry for you; it’s something you have to earn by actively working to change and do better. and by forgoing the “misunderstood/tragic past” route, Horikoshi is making a statement that anyone can go down the wrong path, but that more importantly, anyone can also choose at any time to turn away from said path. there is only one requirement for doing so, and that is realizing that you’ve done wrong, and deciding that you want to change.

anyway, so in chapter 284 Kacchan of course had that whole speech about Deku not taking himself into account, and mentioned how that made him want to keep his distance. and a good chunk of fandom took this to mean that Katsuki’s bullying was actually a misguided response to Deku’s reckless tendencies -- sort of an “if I show him how weak and powerless he really is, I can get him to accept the reality that he’s quirkless, and that being a hero will just get him hurt or killed” type of thing. and I won’t lie, for a good while I was wondering myself if Horikoshi was really going to go down that route. and like I said, I am honestly relieved that he didn’t. not only for the reasons stated in the previous paragraph, but also because the message that would have sent -- that there are certain circumstances in which bullying can almost be excused because the bully had Good Intentions and was just trying to save the other person from themselves, and so it Wasn’t That Bad, Actually -- is all kinds of fucked up to say the least. so yeah, I’m glad we ended up steering well clear of that.

(ETA: this post was long enough already so I edited out the 3 additional paragraphs I originally wrote analyzing the dialogue from 284. but just to be clear, I’m not trying to imply that Kacchan worrying about Deku’s recklessness is a retconned thing that Horikoshi only threw into the story recently, because there are multiple instances throughout the story where he clearly is worried and in total denial of it. but I firmly believe those feelings are not what led to the bullying. they’re two separate things. Kacchan worrying about Deku is what prompts him to yell at him in chapter 1 when Deku comes to save him. but it’s not what incited him to burn his notebook and taunt him earlier in that same chapter. that action had a much meaner and more selfish motivation behind it, and I’m glad Horikoshi didn’t try to change it up last minute, because it wouldn’t have felt right.)

thankfully as of this chapter I think we can safely cross that out as a possibility, as we’re given the true explanation straight from Katsuki himself. and the truth is that he bullied Deku out of insecurity and jealousy and fear and intolerance. there was nothing noble about it. there were no good intentions concealed in his actions. there are no justifications given, no excuses offered, and no mitigating circumstances to be considered, other than the fact (which neither he nor Horikoshi bring up) that he was and is still a child, and that children make mistakes.

it’s an explanation that challenges many of fandom’s ideas on who is and isn’t eligible to be redeemed. there is no Ozai in Katsuki’s backstory. there’s no great tragedy that he spent a lifetime trying to rise above. the only villain in Katsuki’s story is Katsuki himself. the only darkness that he has to overcome is his own. and it’s challenging, because I think many people believe the only way someone can be redeemed for doing bad things is if bad things happen to them in return. but what Horikoshi is saying here is that that’s not the case. bad doesn’t erase bad. and the one and only way to truly earn redemption is by doing good.

and that’s what makes this such a phenomenal scene for me. by not shying away from Katsuki’s flaws and failings, and having him take full responsibility for them, Horikoshi keeps the apology from being self-serving, and underscores the true depth of Katsuki’s character development. the level of self-awareness he has here is something most people can only dream of. which is very fitting, as that’s perhaps the most important takeaway from his character arc -- that it’s only by acknowledging your own weaknesses and flaws that you can learn to overcome them and reach your full potential.

one last thing to point out here, which is that in the panel where Katsuki finally acknowledges his terrible treatment of Deku, Deku is not even visible. instead, Horikoshi drew the panel from a perspective that makes it appear that Katsuki is addressing this particular line not just to Deku, but to all of his classmates.

again, he shows him taking full responsibility and admitting his wrongdoings in front of the people whose opinions and approval he cares about most. and just to clarify in case there’s any confusion from Caleb’s translation, Kacchan’s wording makes it very clear that he wasn’t just “mean” to Deku, but that he full-on bullied him (he uses the same verb -- “ijimeru” (苛める) -- that he did back in chapter 284). there’s no attempt to downplay his actions here.

moving on now, this chapter also reaffirmed another thing about Deku and Kacchan’s relationship which I was glad to see revisited -- Kacchan’s unwavering belief in Deku’s ability. this is one of those paradoxical things about their relationship which I’ve always been fascinated by, but which is also kind of hard to explain, because I don’t want it to come off like I’m trying to put a positive spin on something which was unequivocally awful. like, please don’t think I’m trying to say that Katsuki’s bullying of Deku was in any way a good thing. but that being said, there’s also a strange irony at play here, which is that Katsuki’s jealousy and insecurity also betray the fact that even at his very worst, he never once underestimated Deku. he has always believed in Deku’s strength, even when that strength pissed him off and made him afraid and uneasy.

no one else -- not All Might, or even Deku’s own mom -- believed from the get-go that Deku could become a hero. but Katsuki never once counted him out, even when he was calling him a pebble in his shoe. he confesses here that even though he “tried to act superior by rejecting [Deku]”, in truth he was never able to shake the feeling that Deku was above him. long before he ever understood the concept of “win to save”, he knew instinctively that there was a strength in Deku’s heart that couldn’t be measured, and which had the potential to surpass even his own strength. and I’ve always felt that this was so important, because it’s the one aspect of their early relationship that hinted that on some level, however subconscious, Katsuki held the same type of faith in Deku that Deku always held in him. it was one of the few things that hinted at there being a possible path towards reconciliation one day. and it paved the way for the most important shift in their relationship to date, when Katsuki finally realized who Deku got his quirk from, and responded not with resentment or spite, but with acceptance.

moving on, I also really love the way we see them portrayed at the different stages of their childhood throughout this speech, and how it perfectly lines up with the dialogue. from small children (when Katsuki talks about his insecurities first manifesting), to middle schoolers (when he talks about the bullying), to high schoolers (when he talks about the past year and everything he’s learned at U.A.). Horikoshi really didn’t have to go that hard, but he did, and that’s why we love him.

and then we finally get to That Part.

where do I even start with this there are so many things omg.

the bow. this is the one and only time Katsuki has ever bowed to anyone of his own volition as far as I recall. and this absolutely is a bow, just to be clear, even though his form is straight-up garbage (very Kacchan-esque, with his feet and arms spaced apart because he’s still a punk after all). this is Kacchan showing more humility and respect than he’s ever shown to anyone else in his entire life.

regarding “Izuku”, I actually have mixed feelings about this to tell the truth. I think it was a good call here because it was incredibly effective in setting the tone and showing just how serious Kacchan is. however if he continues to use “Izuku” rather than “Deku” from here on out, that would give the impression in hindsight that all his past usage of “Deku” really was meant as an insult, which would undermine some of my favorite scenes. I would really like to believe that since DvK2 or thereabouts, Kacchan has (mostly) been using “Deku (affectionate)” rather than “Deku (useless loser)”, lol. but if he switches to the “nicer” name on a permanent basis following his apology, it implies that the previous nickname was indeed being used cruelly. and so honestly I hope this was just a one-time thing, because I do think that in Katsuki’s mind, the name “Deku” hasn’t been meant as a slight to him for a long time now.

“my truth/this is what I truly feel” -- the word Katsuki uses in Japanese is honne (本音), and if you’re familiar with the concept of honne/tatemae, that’s the same “honne” he’s talking about here. it means that he’s casting aside all of his walls and facades and expressing what he truly feels. and of course, one of the fascinating things about Katsuki’s character is that he’s the exact opposite of most people in that he chooses to put his meanness on full display to the public, and ironically it’s the kindest parts of himself which he tends to keep the most carefully guarded and hidden away. this also means that while his rage and anger are very often insincere and put on just for show, those relatively few occasions where he lets his humanity truly shine through are pretty much 100% genuine, as is the case with this one here.

and Deku’s face says it all when it comes to how powerful those moments can be as a result.

and this, right here, is why it wasn’t enough for Katsuki to atone solely through his actions, and why he needed to actually say the words as well. it’s not that the words are more important; obviously the actions are far and away the most important part, and carry far more meaning. but the reason why Katsuki needed to say the words as well is simply because Izuku needed to hear them. needed to, and deserved to, because this is one of the most important people in the world to him.

and so he deserves to know that the relationship isn’t just one-sided, and that he is just as important to Kacchan as Kacchan is to him. he deserves to know that Kacchan understands how horribly he treated him, and that he’s sorry for it. and he deserves to know that Kacchan, without any expectation of it changing their relationship -- meaning that he will continue to feel this way regardless of what Izuku says or does from here on out -- cares about him. now more than ever, with AFO out there doing everything in his power to make Izuku feel as alone as possible, this is something that he really, really needed to hear.

so this part has some interesting wordplay which neither Caleb’s translation nor the fan scanlation was really able to get across. basically, in the Japanese version, when Katsuki talks about “those ideals”, Horikoshi uses the kanji for “ideal”, but pronounces it as “All Might.” obviously the meaning of this isn’t too hard to decipher, as we all know how much both boys admire All Might. to them, he absolutely is synonymous with the Ideal. so this is a way of showing that respect they both have towards him, even as Katsuki goes on to point out the one fatal flaw that All Might was never able to overcome.

and speaking of interesting wording, as others have noted, at this point in his speech Katsuki switches from “temee” (which he was using earlier during the “your strengths and my weaknesses” part) to “omae” (“omae” being a less insulting word for “you”, though still very manly and tough-sounding), which is definitely a big deal. though fwiw this is not the first time he’s used “omae” for Deku (he switches to it briefly right after DvK2, when he tells Deku “you had the strongest guy lay the groundwork for you -- don’t lose”, and then later when they’re walking back to the dorms and he says he’ll learn and get stronger by watching everyone around him just like Deku did). it’s definitely a good choice on Horikoshi’s part though, as it makes this last part of the speech sound more earnest and sincere.

just a quick note, he does indeed use a plural pronoun here, as in “the obstacles that you can’t overcome, we will overcome.” but as @pikahlua pointed out, the “we” here is ambiguous -- it could either mean “we” as in class 1-A -- “we will overcome them for you” -- OR it could mean “we” as in all of them -- class 1-A and Deku. “we will overcome them together.” idk about you, but I know which one gets my vote.

anyway, and so this is the line that finally wins Deku over and allows him to let go of his fears, however briefly. what I love about this is Kacchan’s utter conviction. one thing that Caleb’s translation doesn’t quite get across is Kacchan’s use of the word morenaku -- “without exception” -- when he talks about how they’re going to save everyone and win. it echoes that same sentiment he showed back during the Joint Training arc -- that it’s not a perfect victory unless they save everyone. every last person. and he explicitly lists Deku among their number, just so there can be no doubt.

and Deku’s response to this (or at least his thoughts, since he’s not really able to get many words out) pretty much brings everything full circle here.

he acknowledges that everyone else has gotten ahead of him. which is especially meaningful given who he’s standing directly across from. because for most of the series, as we all well know, it’s been Kacchan who was woefully lagging behind Deku in the character growth department. but now Deku himself is acknowledging that not only has Kacchan finally caught up at last, but that he and the others have surpassed him. which is only temporary, I should add, as I have zero doubt that Deku will catch up again soon. but the fact remains that just as Deku’s rapid increase in strength and skill left Kacchan scrambling to keep up earlier in the series, Kacchan’s extraordinary character development has now left Deku in that same position. as All Might once put it, “when he’s starting at level one, and you’re already at level 50, it’s only natural that you’ll be growing at different rates.”

and what’s so wonderful about this though is that the two of them are finally approaching that point where they’ve both caught up to each other and are finally starting to level out. Deku is a full-on badass, and Kacchan is out here talk-no-jutsuing with the best of them. the two of them have been chasing and chasing after each other this entire time, and now they’re finally just about ready to meet in the middle at long last, with each of them fully embodying both of those two crucial aspects -- win, and save.

just about. because Deku still needs some help catching up. but seeing as help has already been offered -- and accepted -- I can’t imagine it will be very long now, and I can’t wait to see him finally overcoming those fears and doubts with his friends by his side. it’s going to be such a powerful moment.

and last but not least,

or, as I prefer,

you had one job, Caleb. flkjsdlk.

but at least this provides a good opportunity to note that unlike the “we’ll help you handle it” line earlier in the speech, here the phrasing is left up to interpretation, as he doesn’t use a pronoun. so it could be “we know”, or, as the fan scanlation put it, “I know.” or it could be both. regardless, it’s good stuff.

anyway, and so Deku passes out, and in the process Horikoshi gives us one last parting metaphor, just in case anyone still thinks Kacchan is all talk because they haven’t been paying attention for the past 322 chapters (more likely than you think). once again, Katsuki’s actions speak louder than his words (even his nice words) ever could: he is literally there to catch Deku when he falls.

so that’s it! my sincere thanks to anyone who actually read through all of my endless ramblings about this scene which I have been waiting for since day one. props to Horikoshi for taking on an impossibly difficult task, and pulling it off with all of the emotion and care and nuance that I’ve come to expect from his writing. imo he delivered on every single level with the exception of the aftermath, which I don’t consider to have actually happened yet. Deku’s part of this is definitely a “to be continued.” but yeah, as far as Kacchan’s part goes, 10/10. so fucking proud of this kid.

#bnha 322 #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #bakudeku #bnha meta #bakugou meta #deku meta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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xokiddo · 2 years

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Baseball Headcanons feat. AOT Men ⚾️

In light of Opening Day being cancelled (fuck Rob Manfred and everything he does), here's my attempt to console myself with some baseball headcanons. These will include YouTube links to funny moments in the MLB that I think each character would end up doing if they were Major League players themselves, so enjoy the laugh. Bonus points if you can guess my fave team from this lol

Characters featured: Zeke, Eren, Armin, Levi, Connie, Jean, Floch, Porco, Reiner.

⚾️ Zeke

Obviously, he's a pitcher. Has a crazy arm.

Grows his facial hair out during the season. Refuses to cut it until the team loses and is kicked out of the playoffs - or until they win.

Oddly superstitious. Not quite Wade Boggs' level of superstitious, but is weird about things like eating certain foods or turning the ball in his hand twice before a pitch.

If he's in the National League, he totally hits when he can.

Pitches in the All-Star Game multiple times.

Claims to have a love-hate relationship with Levi Ackerman, despite having drinks with him a semi-regular basis and tweeting shit posts at each other.

Has been the victim of a mascot stealing from him, and he's never recovered since.

⚾️ Eren

Catcher. 100%. Fight me on this.

He’s signed to the same team as Zeke for his rookie year, and they’re a force when they’re on the field together.

Is able to play in an All-Star Game with his brother once, which was a special year for them.

He grows his hair out during the season but doesn’t do the facial hair during the season. Says it gets too hot in the catcher’s mask with facial hair. Frankly, he debates cutting his hair halfway through the season every time because he forgets how hot it can be with all the gear on, but ultimately he gets chewed out by Zeke over the phone every time he considers it.

“Bro it’s just hair—“ “We have a 12-game winning streak do not fucking cut it—“

Eren is notoriously friendly with fans. Will never turn down a kid for a signature or photograph if he can help it. Shadis (his team’s manager) has to practically yank him away from the barriers before a game when he’s caught up signing for kids running up with their memorabilia and a marker.

Only time he’s been ejected from the field is during a spat with Jean, of course, during one of Jean’s at-bat appearances when they were exchanging mumbled, angry words.

They made up after and next series of games, they quickly exchanged a brief bro-hug (you know the one) during pre-game warm ups.

⚾️ Armin

Third Baseman.

Gives me Shohei Ohtani vibes in the sense that he’s an underdog. People don’t expect much from him (throwback to the article saying Ohtani isn’t any better than a high school hitter) and then he blows away expectations in games.

He’s a switch-hitter and I will die on that hill.

Not a power-hitter, but he’s fast.

Fan favorite because he’s a big ol’ softie and a cinnamon roll. On the flipside, this cinnamon roll also can crack a bat if he’s swinging hard enough.

Also super friendly with fans and other players alike. Doesn’t get into beef with anyone, though he’s unafraid to call out executives and front offices when they’re being shady and dumb. He brings facts and won’t be outsmarted.

Has tripped over the base after catching a pop-fly. Levi then signalled he was safe on base while straight-faced.

⚾️ Levi

Pitcher.

Has a literal rivalry with Zeke. However, on the down-low they’re actually good friends.

If one of their teams makes it to the post-season or World Series and the other doesn’t, they do show support for the other.

Proof of the above statement is one year, Zeke’s team made it to the World Series, and Levi’s did not. You could see Levi in the stands during the game, though, sporting a jersey with Zeke’s name on the back. (Zeke did the same for Levi the following year when Levi’s team made it.)

He was on the same team as Jean during Jean’s rookie year, and he took Jean under his wing to help him train and develop into the star player he is today.

Even though he’s had a strained relationship with his uncle, Kenny makes a point to show up to games when he can. Whenever Levi’s team makes it to the post-season or even the World Series, Kenny brings a photograph of Kuchel that he tucks in his pocket and holds when Levi’s at bat or pitching. The games that Levi wins, he clutches the photo and shouts, “That’s our boy!”

Levi doesn’t comment on this in interviews. He keeps it close to his chest because it’s not a moment to share with the world.

⚾️ Connie

Shortstop.

Fan favorite. Resident goofball. Think Brett Phillips. Does the airplane on a home run, the whole nine yards. Everyone loves him because he adds a whole other layer of fun to the sport.

Professional Base Stealer™️

No, seriously. He’s notorious for always trying even if he doesn’t manage to pull it off, though he’s quick enough to always get back to where he was.

He once stole home in a game while Zeke was pitching, who was too shocked to be pissed off about it.

Totally the dude to (playfully) fuck around and joke with the other team’s mascot before a game.

I wholeheartedly believe Connie would pull off this insane play where that Javier Baez did when he stole two bases after playing a weird game of chicken with the first baseman?? You just have to watch, but Connie would completely pull this shit off lol

⚾️ Jean

Second baseman.

He has an on-going beef with Eren, but it’s mostly petty back and forth. They’re actually great friends who just get mouthy before games to rile up fans and excitement.

Has played in the All-Star Game a few times.

Also a switch-hitter.

Unfortunately, in the middle of a World Series game, he threw the ball at his own leg as he fell catching a ball mid-play. He’s never been able to live this down. (Fortunately, they won that game, but this play certainly isn’t forgotten!)

He’s in the same club as Eren as far as the hair goes - during the season, he’ll maintain the sides, but otherwise doesn’t cut it.

Notorious for getting drunk and then going on live on Instagram and just chatting with his followers all night.

⚾️ Floch

Center fielder.

He’s a surprise power-hitter, which people didn’t expect initially because he’s not stocky and bulky. However, he has some strength behind that bat.

Very well-spoken in interviews, so he’s often shoved in front of the camera so his teammates don’t have to do so.

He ends up with the Rookie of the Year award for his breakout year. He’s never taken that for granted, and he treasures being welcomed so eagerly in the Major Leagues.

Kind of a riot on twitter. Doesn’t talk shit to other players, but he’s constantly posting memes and taking the piss out of people he knows that he can get away with.

⚾️ Porco

Right fielder. Can fill in the infield if he has to, but ultimately, he prefers the outfield.

Constantly starts shit with team mascots. It’s mostly for show, but he won’t ever admit that it’s a joke. In an interview, with a dead serious expression, says “Oh, next time I see that shit-head, it’s on.”

Great at engaging with fans. He’s happy to sign memorabilia or take a photo, but he usually prefaces it with, “Only if you show me a picture of your dog.” If they don’t have a dog, he just asks to see pet pictures in general.

His dietitian gets pissed with him because he breaks his diet a lot, but he just loves food, okay?

Ends up with a praying mantis on his hat during an inning in the second half of the game, in the vein of the same hilarious moment with Victor Robles. The damn thing stays on his hat for an entire inning and a half.

⚾️ Reiner

First baseman.

He manages crazy defensive plays, like doing a full-on split while catching to get a runner out from first a la Ji Man Choi in these kinds of plays.

Teddy bear energy. He’s intimidating during a game, but in between plays or at the dug-out, he’s grinning and all around having a good time.

Fucking shines in the Home Run Derby.

Notorious for his batting. Strong infield player in general, but he’s a beast at bat.

Biggest softie when a kid comes up shouting for an autograph or photo. If a kid manages to yell loud enough and grab his attention in a game, he can’t help giving a smile and wave just before the pitch is thrown.

#headcanons by kiddo #zeke headcanons #eren headcanons #armin headcanons #floch headcanons #jean headcanons #connie headcanons #porco headcanons #reiner headcanons #levi headcanons #baseball au #words by kiddo #this was fun to do

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chateautae · 3 years

Text

flirt | pjm. (m)

➵ summary : park jimin is a notorious flirt, but so are you. when you both meet at a party after weeks of back and forth, it’s a matter of time before somebody gives in

➵ pairing : jimin x reader

➵ genre : college!au, sexual tension, smut, pwp

➵ rating : 18+

➵ word count : 4k

➵ warnings : super suggestive flirting, alcohol consumption (both parties able to consent), swearing, light dom and sub themes, soft dom!jimin, brat!reader, little bit of brat-handling, dirty talk, praising but also degradation? it’s hot i promise, use of slut, slight body worshipping, mentions of oral, jimin is hot and yes that’s a warning in itself, breast play, unprotected sex, penetrative + rough sex, bit of angsty sex, creampie cause i seem to not like it any other way

➵ a/n : and my first jimin fic is here!! dear god i love this boy to the moon and back so i got a bit carried with him lmao, hopefully this isn’t terrible cause i still need to edit it but your support and feedback are always appreciated!! <3

2 hours.

2 hours since you first came to this party. You’ve bumped into at least a hundred people, danced your legs numb, God knew how many and what concoction of drinks were inebriating your system and still, you hadn’t seen Park Jimin the whole night.

The only reason you even dragged yourself to this party was because of him. You were initially bailing on the annual ‘one-last-hurrah-before-midterms’ party because you, like everyone else here had midterms haunting them Monday. It was Friday night and as the ever diligent student, you were planning to study over the weekend.

Though your nagging best friend Hoseok had other plans, threatening you to come with every piece of dirt he had on you until he finally sprinkled Jimin’s name into the mix. You couldn’t lie, it was the only reason you decided to hell with your education, wiggled into a barely-there dress and waltzed in with Hoseok ready to take the night on.

But when you hadn’t seen Jimin at all, you were left annoyed, pissed off and with a headache raking your brain.

Seeing him was a selfish desire, one you’d develop after realizing you had met your match when you first encountered Jimin. You were always fairly notorious for your flirtatious habits and touchiness, a sort of trademark of yours and the same was always said about a ‘Park Jimin’ unknown to you, sometimes described to be an even bigger flirt.

It automatically intrigued you, curious of what kind of rival you secretly harbored until one day, you chanced upon Hoseok who just so happened to be with Jimin.

At first, you didn't think Jimin could be a daring flirt. He had this sweet smile and disciplined way of speaking that screamed innocent to you, his mannerisms and demeanor shy and introverted. He didn’t make big moves and so you wrote him off as just that.

But it wasn’t until you started seeing him outside your class’ building, alone, and multiple times after that, enough for you to realize he was anything but shy or innocent.

You ended up observing that a) he was sex on legs, b) easily flipped between the persona of an angel and a demon and c) anything he did could seem flirting.

You two hit it off without a hitch, your flirtatious tendencies meeting to form a relationship of mutual interest. It was clear as day, both your actions almost always held some sort of unknown intentions behind them, your every saying a double meaning.

It became the norm between you two, anytime you met turning into a conversation riddled with innuendos, suggestive lip-biting or eyes that couldn’t help but wander. And you weren't stupid, you could tell he wanted you just as much as you wanted him. You two were dangerous, testing the limits of either’s control, hoping someone would give in and only left disappointed when nobody did.

So when Hoseok mentioned this party, and graciously added Park Jimin’s name to it, you knew this was your chance. A party with buzzing bodies, loud music and copious amounts of alcohol was bound to set him off, especially if you were dressed scandalously and felt bolder with liquid courage pumping through your system.

But it’d been 2 hours, and you hadn’t seen him all night. You were taking another shot in the kitchen, sulking by yourself and reflecting on the fact that you’d been duped by Hoseok. This party became useless to you, a mere waste of your time as you quickly discarded your cup and began stomping out of the kitchen.

You ventured further into the house to look for Hoseok’s 5’10 ass, tell him he’s the worst best friend for lying to you and that you were leaving this disappointment of a party.

You stepped around people mindfully, dodging them until you rammed smack dab into someone’s back, scrambling for an apology before looking at the unaffected victim.

Park fucking Jimin.

“Y/N!” Jimin beamed, holding a drink in his hand as he smiled widely.

“Jimin, hey! I thought you didn’t come tonight.” You attempted biting back your smile from finally finding him, shouting over the bass of the music as you met him on the dance floor.

“I just ran late. You know me, of course I’d be here!” Jimin raised his drink to his plump lips and sipped, stepping side-to-side in rhythm with the music.

You couldn’t make him out that well, the disco lights of whatever lights system the only means of seeing him in the dark, but you swear the smirky grin on his face as he scanned you over wasn’t just a figment of your imagination, ecstatic that you already seemed to be reeling him in. “Do you want a drink?”

“No, I already had-” You didn’t get to finish your sentence as someone’s raging body stumbled into yours suddenly, sending you off balance until Jimin reached out for you cautiously.

“Woah, easy there.” Jimin’s arms quickly held you, flashing a scolding look at the person who bumped into you and pulling you towards himself. “Are you here with someone tonight?”

“Yeah, Hoseok! I was looking for him.”

“Why’s that?”

“I.. wasn’t having fun, so I wanted to leave with him.” You swiftly masked the real truth, your voice becoming less of a shout as Jimin encased you, just a few centimeters between your bodies as you peered up at him, cheeks flushed with heat and alcohol.

“Leave with him? Damn, didn’t know you two were like that.” Jimin flashed you a suggestive look, raising his eyebrows.

“Shut up, you know we’re just best friends.” You both erupted into a fit of chuckles as you hit his chest, your hand smacking against his jacket and now that you were close, registered what a meal he looked like tonight; ripped black jeans, plain white t-shirt underneath a distressed jean jacket, all pulled together sexily by his tousled hair, small hoop earrings and a Chanel necklace decorating his neck.

Dear God, how many times you’ve ached to kiss that pretty, pretty neck.

You internally groaned, habitually drawing closer to him as you enjoyed the warmth of his body, nostrils filling with the familiar scent of his intoxicating cologne.

“So I hear you wanna have some fun.” Jimin perked up, eyes amused and hands smoothing over your sides slowly after faltering from your arms.

“Are you suggesting I’ll have fun with you?”

“Of course, gorgeous, but up to you how we do that.” Jimin stepped dangerously closer to you as his voice lowered, your face tucked into his chest as his body blocked other people from touching you.

Excitement shot to your center at his use of a pet name, a common occurrence during your exchanges though his choices of which always an added thrill.

“And what if I just want to leave and eat at a diner instead?”

“Then I’d definitely take you, food and you? A win in my book.”

You cocked an eyebrow, crossing your arms. “Adding me to the mix suddenly makes it a win? I’m not the one on the menu, Park.”

Jimin’s eyes seem to blow out, leaning down as his plushy lips ghosted your ear as he spoke, tone darkened, “We can change that, princess.”

A thrill shot throughout your body, hyper aware of his lips mere inches from your face as your heart began to race, turning towards him expectantly.

You began advancing slowly to decrease the gap between your mouths, feeling him inch forward in response, letting him hover just above your lips for a tease before you stopped, “I’d like to see you try, Park.”

Then you abruptly turned out of his hold and walked away, making it through a few people into a hallway, allowing yourself to breathe. You loved teasing Jimin, it was an incredibly entertaining pass time but dear God, did it knock the fucking wind out of you.

You were mentally recuperating from the fact that he almost let you kiss him, distracted as you stepped away until someone suddenly snatched your arm and pinned you against the nearest wall. You were honestly shocked to see Jimin, surprised he actually took your bait and stayed on your trail to stop you. His dancing eyes held nothing but greed, evident even in the darkness of the party.

“You know just how to test people, don’t you?” Jimin warned as he narrowed his dangerous eyes at you, holding your hot-skinned wrists against the cool wall.

“Of course I do, it makes things fun and last time I checked,” You brought your face to his and left only an inch between you two, “that’s just what I want.”

Jimin visibly grew less tamed, glancing down towards your lips as he tried breathing controllably, “Careful what you wish for, princess. It might come true.”

“And if that’s what I want?” You titled your head expectantly, licking your lips as you watched Jimin bite his own. He eyed you the whole time, making it a statement to drink you in every inch of you.

You could smell the alcohol on him, assuming liquor was the only driving force behind his actions but then contemplated his level-headedness, his coherent speech and clear judgment in this moment.

Jimin was choosing to chase after you, choosing to not let you go after weeks of incessant back and fourth and you knew you were finally getting closer to exactly what you wanted.

Park Jimin giving in.

“You’re fucking hot.” Jimin commented, eyes eating you up hungrily.

“You’re hotter.” You grinned and leaned back against the wall, cleavage unintentionally popping out for him and Jimin’s look immediately shifted, bringing his body closer against yours.

“You look submissive as hell right now, is that what you like? To be dominated?”

“Only if you like to dominate.”

Jimin could feel the reigns on his control snapping, biting down to contain his raw desire to fuck you. He’s been holding himself back, knowing you seemed willing on your end of the interactions but never wanting to take the leap in case it was all just an act.

But as he watched you go along with his every comment, staring back at him with the same devious eyes and practically offering yourself to him in his hold, he knew you weren’t acting at all.

“You talk a big game, but can you put your money where your mouth is?” Jimin leaned his hips against yours, ensuring you could feel his growing hardness.

“My mouth can do a lot of fucking things, Park.” You jutted your hips into his.

Jimin shut his eyes frustratedly before he re-opened them, a downright obsidian colour taking them over.

“Go the fuck upstairs.”

“Wh-”

“I said, go the fuck upstairs.” Jimin demanded, looking at you with conviction so searing you in fact did become submissive.

“W-which room-” You didn’t complete your question as Jimin’s deft hands encased you and lifted you off the ground, bridal-style.

“Jimin-!” You exclaimed.

“Say another word and I’ll make sure you feel me in your throat.”

You immediately swallowed your mouth shut as Jimin cluthed you to him, core alighting with desire as he carried you up the stairs. Jimin arrived at the second floor and rushed towards the first room with an ajar door, shutting it with your feet after entering.

He made towards the bed and practically threw you onto it, stepping away to lock the door before leaning against it, arms crossed and serious.

“You sure you want this?” His voice came out considerate, no haste or pressure.

“Yes, Jimin.”

“You’re completely sure?”

You nodded incessantly.

“I need your words, Y/N.”

“Yes.” You affirmed, unintentionally becoming submissive as you awaited him, and Jimin couldn't resist you, not any longer. He made towards your smaller figure on the bed and immediately crashed his lips onto yours, knee sinking into the mattress as he leaned over you, splaying you onto the bed.

He held your wrists against the sheets, kissing you open as his plump lips worked tirelessly against your mouth. He continued to swallow you, opening up to catch all of you as he sank further downwards to feel your body arch into his.

His wet tongue glided over your lips and you welcomed him in lightspeed, letting his muscle entangle with yours hastily and you instantly loved the taste of him.

Jimin’s kisses began deepening, exploring your mouth like he was dehydrated and your mouth was fresh water. His thigh began pressing against your core and you moaned into his mouth as Jimin disconnected from you, panting for air.

“Don’t fucking do that.” He voiced frustratedly, his full lips swollen and pink as he tried to contain himself.

“Do what?”

“Fucking moan, it does shit to me.”

“Sucks for you, I’m responsive as fuck.” You snipped as his sudden confession made you hot, squishing your thighs together. Jimin took notice and he flashed a look at your core.

“Responsive, huh?” Jimin let go of your wrist, sliding his hand down your body before pressing his fingers to your heat through your dress. You instantly gasped, arching as you felt your walls clench around absolutely nothing.

“J-Jimin.” you warned him weakly.

“Mm?” Jimin paid no attention as he lowered himself to your neck and began kissing, tonguing, sucking at a spot that had you cowering and squirming underneath him.

You groaned as your free hand tangled into his hair, hugging him to your neck as you basked in the glory of his plush lips devouring you. He was laving and nibbling at your skin, continuously kissing the area of your carotid all while rubbing his hand against your clothed cunt. Jimin began rutting his body against yours, the tip of his cock prodding you the more he moved.

“Fuck you, Jimin. This isn’t fair.” You moaned breathlessly

“As fair as it gets, princess. You wanted to see my try, yeah?” Jimin suddenly stopped his movements on your core and slid his hand up your bare thigh, only to shift your stained panties to the side and glide his fingers all over your bare pussy. You gasped Jimin’s name and tugged at his hair harshly, the alcohol hazing everything over with sensitivity and trying to sustain the sheer amount of pleasure he was rewarding you.

“N-nothing’s fair about this.”

Jimin smoothed the pads of his fingers over your slick core, eliciting your incessant gasps, “Fuck with my ego and I fuck with you, baby.”

He was leaving purple marks all along your neck and chest, moving down to the valley of your breasts and you whined headily, hating that he had such an advantage in this position.

You immediately grew bold enough to push him off by his chest, detaching him as Jimin looked at you confused. “Y/N, what the fu-” was all Jimin could get out before you stood up and gripped his cock through his pants, his breath immediately hitching. He looked at you with surprised eyes, growing weaker in your hold as you walked him back against a vanity in the room.

You had no clue who this room belonged to, but you could care less when you were minutes away from getting fucked by Park Jimin.

He let out breathy little moans as you palmed him, shutting his eyes in bliss as he turned harder by the second, leaning back against the counter. You planted your lips to his neck and mouthed fervently, making sure you embellished his skin with your desire for him. “F-fuck. Y/N, this isn’t fair.”

“Fuck with my ego and I fuck with you, baby.” You mocked him and began rubbing at his shaft, sucking hickies onto his pretty neck and licking over the areas your teeth grazed. Jimin continued groaning, hugging you close to him as he fisted his hands against your body, trying everything to cherish the pleasure he felt.

The person he’s been desiring ever since he heard about you, his every nerve thrilled by your ability to counter him, match his energy of constant flirting and testing the waters, venturing further than him sometimes.

You were just so tempting and Jimin wanted every last bit of you.

That sentiment increased when he felt your hands snake towards the belt of his jeans, unbuckling harshly with need so apparent he wanted nothing but to stuff your walls, now.

“No, fuck off, getting inside you first.” Jimin denied your hands, capturing them in his hold.

You instantly whined, “But Jimin, want you to fuck my face.” You pouted into his neck, kissing along his collar bones as you rutted against him.

“Fucking God, I’m destroying you for that.” Jimin wrapped you up in his arms and switched the positions, shoving you against the vanity, your ass on the edge of the counter as Jimin stood in between your spread out legs, lips meeting yours again.

Jimin lifted the skirt of your dress up and over your backside, pooling around your waist as his hands slid over your fleshy thighs to the band of your panties. He pulled only to snap them back against your skin, the contact making you gasp.

“Why the fuck are you still wearing these?”

“And why the fuck are you still wearing clothes?” You chastised, hands greedily shoving his jacket off him even with your mouth attached to his.

Jimin didn’t allow the action to compromise your kiss either, practically ripping his jacket off and breathing hard against you as he threw it away. He then pulled his t-shirt over himself, revealing his toned, lean body underneath and only leaving his Chanel necklace hanging over his bare chest. You licked your lips at the sight of his smooth and pretty body, the outline of his abs like a work of art.

You reached out to touch him, his face and skin flushed with lust as he watched you. “You’re so hot, Jimin, so pretty.” You praised, eyes ogling him.

Jimin smirked proudly before speaking, “Your turn.”

He searched for the zipper of your dress and unzipped hastily, peeling away the top to reveal your naked breasts and now it was his turn to ogle at you.

“Fuck me, you’re prettier.” He huffed out, eyes blown out entirely.

“Probably not as pretty as your cock, let me suck.” You pouted playfully and pulled him closer to you with the back of your shins, hands greedily feeling up his bare chest.

“Only good girls get to suck my dick.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me, you’re a fucking brat and a half.” Jimin started kneading your breasts, licking his lips as he watched you spread your legs wider for him and lean your head back out of pure bliss.

“I am not a brat, you just fucking take 10 years to get it on.” You snapped back, moaning in between at the way he groped your breasts, rolling the buds of your nipples with his fingertips.

“Sorry I was a fucking gentleman, didn’t know you were such a cock-hungry slut.” Jimin bit as he planted his thick lips to your perched nipple, eliciting curses from you as his tongue began swirling around, sucking teasingly.

“You just can’t fuck, isn’t it? All bark and no bite?”

Jimin scoffed darkly at that, sucking harder on your sensitive nipples before letting go with a pop. “I’ll fucking break you is why I kept holding off, you’ll regret this, princess.”

“Break me then, Jimin, please. Fuck me like you say you will, I need you.” Your arousal became unbearable as you grew hornier, rocking your hips against him for friction while he laved at either of your nipples.

“I will, baby. Get these off and I’ll fuck you so good.” Jimin tugged at your panties and you lifted your ass for him to discard them.

You unhooked Jimin’s belt and shoved into his pants, pulling his boxers and jeans down until you finally freed his leaking length, thick and throbbing to be treated.

What you always thought was right, his cock was pretty just like him. You graciously pumped him, spreading his pre-cum over the head as you watched him lean his head back, kissing under his jaw.

“So pretty, Jimin, just like you.”

Jimin stopped caring about any and everything and instantly grabbed one of your legs, spreading you wide open for him and situated himself before your entrance.

He brought a hand over yours pumping his member and moved you quicker against his hot flesh, looking down at the lewd scene and your pretty pussy aching for him.

“Look at you soaking, baby, so much prettier.”

You moaned needily, the back of your shins urging Jimin closer to you again as you whined. “Jimin..”

“Raw?” he breathed impatiently.

“Fuck yes, birth control.”

Jimin didn’t even take a millisecond before he was pushing against your hole, placing the hand that was pumping his member now against your pelvic bone, pressing down to feel himself sink inside of you.

You instantly careened, moaning out so loud that if there wasn’t music blaring in the house, everyone would know how stuffed Jimin made you feel.

“Fuck-Jimin! Stop doing that, it feels too fucking good..!” You nearly cried, the pressure of Jimin’s hand making you feel any and every ridge, vein and hardness of his thick cock, your walls drinking him in.

“Fuck you, this is what you get.” Jimin blurted as he buried himself to the hilt, groaning satisfyingly at your warm walls hugging him before plunging to make out with you.

Jimin began fucking you with conviction, determination to drive you insane for him as he spread you open. He thrusted fast and hard from the get-go, neglecting to set a pace knowing how much of a cock-loving brat you were. His thumb resting just above your clit dipped down to lightly play with your bud, tease it, all the while licking into your mouth and thrusting into you.

You gasped hard, so much that Jimin’s name was the only thing coherent within them and he swallowed all your sounds with his lips. Your body was on fire at the drag of his cock, shocked at how wet you were when he hadn’t even fingered or eaten you out, his cock doing all the work, leaving you only thinking of Park Jimin’s sheer power.

You wanted all of him so badly, wanted him to ruin you, destroy you like he said he would, fuck you open like he always insinuated he would.

“Jimin, please, harder! Fuck me like the brat I am, teach me a fucking lesson.”

“Princess likes it hard, huh? Want me to fuck this pussy up? Make it all mine?” Jimin’s words were so filthy they had you clutching onto him tightly, arousal gushing from you as Jimin impaled you harder, snapping into you.

His thumb continued its onslaught, your walls convulsing to his every stroke as you gripped his shoulders and kissed him, biting his plushy bottom lip as he fucked you harder.

“Mm, Jimin, fuck!” Your tits bounced as he pounded into you, taking his every thrust like a champ and he damn well shook the entire vanity, continuously drilling your hole as he gave no room for mercy. Your hands snaked into his hair and tugged, making him groan in approval and he only pushed you open wider in response.

“You pretty brat, look at you getting what you want. Fucked like the cock-loving princess you are.” Jimin breathed against your mouth, his skin slicking with sweat as he worked tirelessly against your opening, battering your pussy with an unforgiving speed.

“You would’ve gotten your dick sucked, but apparently-” you shuddered breathily, “I w-wasn’t a good girl.” You felt weak from his repeated onslaught, the bubbling pleasure in your gut keeping you going.

“Yeah, so fucking behave and maybe I’ll let you choke on my dick.”

“Y-you stop playing games and maybe I’ll let you eat my pussy.”

Jimin only ticked his head to the side as he chuckled darkly, starting to propel his thick cock into your gut and raging at your clit so roughly, you gasped as you carved your pleasure into his skin. Jimin did the same as he bore his fingers into you, a hand squeezing your thigh harshly as he held your leg and your walls fluttered around him, moans growing higher in pitch.

“Jimin! I’m gonna-“ you didn’t even complete your sentence as your walls clamped around him, orgasm washing over you so quickly you barely realized it came. You clenched him like a vice and panted hard against his mouth, Jimin finally coming undone as well, spurts of cum painting your insides and filling you to the brim, certain he’d leak out of you for hours.

You felt stuffed, so full of him you were hazed over with post-orgasm bliss, mind unwinding from any trifling matter on Earth. Your forehead slacked against his shoulder as you both panted for air, sweating as Jimin held your weak body in his arms.

His cock remained shoved inside you, the throbbing letting up on both of you as your highs settled down.

“You..” Jimin swallowed dryly, breathing. “took me like a good girl. Maybe you can suck me off next time.”

“Next time?” You breathed labourly, turning your face towards his.

Jimin peered down at you resting against him, biting back a grin. “Of course, there’s always a next time with flirts like us.”

#thebtswritersclub #jimin x reader #jimin smut #park jimin x reader #bts smut #jimin scenario #jimin fanfiction #park jimin #park jimin college au #bangtanhq

2K notes · View notes

juliabohemian · 3 years

Text

oh dear

I have noticed a number of posts circulating which imply that ANY character being mean to Loki EVER and for ANY reason = abuse.

I will admit that I initially felt mostly irritation at what appeared, on the surface, to constitute such a complete and utter lack of critical thinking. What I’ve realized, though, is that people who make such posts definitely believe what they are saying. And like everything people do and say, there’s a deeper reason for it. The fact is, traumatized characters attract traumatized fans. And not all of those fans are in a good place, emotionally. And those people are perfectly valid, even if the conclusions they draw are not.

When it comes to fiction, good characters are complex. That means they are conflicted and flawed. They make mistakes. They lash out when they are afraid or hurting. They sometimes hurt other characters. Loki fits that bill very well. It’s one of the reasons he is so popular. Not just with traumatized people, but with people in general. He’s relatable.

The problem comes when fans relate to fictional characters, but really aren’t conscious of why, because they aren’t all that conscious of themselves. They haven’t done a whole lot of self-reflection. Maybe because they aren’t ready, because their trauma is too fresh. Or maybe they are still living in crisis and don’t have the freedom to self-reflect. Those possibilities are all valid.

But very often, when a person goes through trauma and doesn’t have the luxury (and yes, it is a luxury) of working through it, their reasoning skills can become flawed as a result. Trauma, especially childhood trauma, tends to have a negative effect on our ability to socialize and form intimate relationships, because it damages our ability to interpret the intentions of others. We call this hostile attribution bias.

The problem with hostile attribution bias, is that it makes it difficult to tell when people genuinely mean you harm. If a person’s words, actions, or facial expressions are ambiguous in any way, they will be interpreted as being hostile in nature. This keeps one on the offensive, constantly, always anticipating the next blow. Very often, no such blow is coming. But it doesn’t matter. Fear is real, and the experience of it is real.

It stands to reason that someone who struggles to interpret the intentions of real-life people would also experience the same difficulty with fictional characters. For instance, fans who identify with Loki because they perceive him as being a victim will have a hard time seeing him as anything else. Thus, anyone who harms Loki in any way is just further proof that the universe is against him and always will be.

This is referred to as an external locus of control. It means that a person sees life as something that is happening TO them, and that they are powerless to affect the outcome. It’s also important to note that people with this mentality struggle deeply to heal from their trauma. They are stuck in a sort of Groundhog Day scenario, living the same thing out over and over again. Because of their flawed perception, everything that happens to them feels like an extension of that initial trauma.

So, it would make perfect sense that a person with a history of trauma, who suffers from attribution bias, and who has an external locus of control, would be extremely uncomfortable watching anything bad happen to Loki. In fact, it would probably be traumatic for them.

And while their feelings and their experience of those feelings are 100% real, their perception of reality is not entirely accurate. In other words, what they think is happening is not necessarily what is happening.

Loki’s initial trauma, believe it or not, was just being abandoned as an infant. Even though he can’t remember it, that experience alone can result in lifelong emotional struggles. In real life, we refer to this as an attachment disorder. A person with an attachment disorder usually develops major issues with abandonment. They also suffer from (wait for it) attribution bias. And that bias absolutely affects their perception.

Loki’s next trauma was being raised in a dysfunctional family. Not only were they dysfunctional, but they weren’t a very good fit for Loki. Loki was a quiet, contemplative person. He was a thinker, an intellectual. He would rather read or do magic. So, not a good fit for Asgardian society. The combination of Loki’s initial trauma, with his inherent temperament, and his dysfunctional family is what led to the inevitable breakdown that is regarded as Loki’s “villain” arc. I’d like to point out that, in reality, such a person would have probably suffered a breakdown much sooner than that. Typically, prior to reaching adulthood.

Loki’s next trauma was encountering Thanos. Now, we have no idea exactly what happened between Loki and Thanos. We know only that it wasn’t good and that it resulted in Loki being absolutely terrified of him. Other than that, details are fuzzy. I think it’s fair to assume that whatever mistreatment Loki endured probably qualified as torture. Whether it was physical or psychological, we cannot know for sure.

While Loki’s Thanos-related trauma was NOT an extension of his family-related trauma, his decision to entangle himself with Thanos was a product of that trauma. By which I mean that his willingness to align himself with someone like Thanos came from a place of desperation, and a desire to prove himself to someone who he perceived as being qualified to validate him.

So, fast forward to the LOKI show. Our version of Loki never returned to Asgard in chains, was never told that it was his birthright to die, nor endured any gaslighting from Ragnarok-Thor. He never got his neck broken by Thanos. He never went through any of that. He arrived at the TVA, fresh off his failed attempt to take over planet Earth. He was all fired up and defensive, as anyone in his situation would probably be.

Now, here’s where we need to put our critical thinking caps on. Because, I hate to tell you this, folks...but unlike most of the Loki content we’ve gotten prior, this content is actually well written. It’s VERY well written. And while it might be tempting to respond to it with pure emotion, it is imperative that we don’t abandon all logic and reason. This show is not an extension of the gauntlet of trauma we’ve watched Loki endure since he first appeared on screen. The creative minds involved in this venture ALL care deeply about Loki’s character and want to see him succeed (whatever that means for him).

Enter Mobius. He’s a cog in a very big machine. He likes to think of himself as being more than that. He establishes a rapport with his boss in the hopes of distinguishing himself from his peers. His interest in his work is personal. He likes what he does.

From Mobius’ point of view, Loki is an asset. He has information that could help solve the bigger puzzle. But Mobius exists in a world that affords him access to multiple realities. He has probably met dozens of Lokis. And he has probably seen hundreds of people casually pruned or executed or reset. It’s just part of the world he happens to be in. And he doesn’t question it, because he has been brainwashed.

So, does Mobius attempt to manipulate Loki? Absolutely. Just another day at the office. And it works, because he knows Loki better than Loki knows himself, has studied him and other Lokis. And it’s hard not to be mad at Mobius for causing Loki pain. Especially when that is followed up by Loki eagerly taking Mobius up on his offer to help track down the other Loki variant.

I think some people might find Loki’s enthusiasm disconcerting. And there are certainly aspects of it that can be considered such. Loki, at his core, just wants to be told that he is doing a good job, that his contributions matter. That part of him is definitely a product of trauma. But is Loki motivated entirely by his trauma? Not really. Despite his manipulations, Mobius offers Loki the closest thing to warmth and compassion that he has seen for a while. Some of that is genuine and some of that is not. And faced with the reality that everything he knows is gone, Loki does what most people in his situation would do, he tries to be productive. He gets busy. He distracts himself. Because at the moment, little else is under his control.

Despite all of that, you simply cannot have compassion for Loki and none for Mobius. Because Mobius is a victim too. He was abducted from his own reality. He is living a lie. He is part of something that, upon deeper reflection, he realizes he doesn’t agree with. He is so very much like the Loki we first met in 2011. He is such a well-written and multi-faceted character, I thoroughly enjoy his on screen time with Loki.

But I understand that there are people who are not in a place, emotionally, where they can overlook such plot devices. And I sincerely hope that those eventually people find healing. In the meantime, let’s try to remember that this is a work of fiction. And unlike real-life trauma, when it becomes upsetting, we can turn it off and walk away.

#loki spoilers #loki show meta #mobius meta #loki show spoilers #juliabohemianrant #juliabohemian #loki meta #mental health awareness #reactive attachment disorder #external locus of control #hostile attribution bias #early childhood trauma

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