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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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331 trans and gender diverse people have been killed in 2019.
I also happen to be trans and I have transgender friends and acquaintances. The model in the photo is a transgender girl who cannot afford to go outside wearing makeup and dresses. She had to prepare for the photo session on-site so that none of the passers-by or acquaintances would see her clothes and cosmetics. Every day, we face or risk facing transphobia. We’re living in constant fear of being resented, ridiculed, misunderstood or attacked.
When I, a transgender person, am not visible, and people don’t know anything about me or people like me, they begin to think of me as of someone else. There are people who've never heard anything about trans and androgynous people. They listen to me and ask questions in amazement. Yet sometimes I'm happy that people can't always understand who I am right away. Sometimes this can even protect me from aggression, because radically-minded people are intentionally harassing non-heteronormative people and virtually anyone who might arouse their suspicions. However, when seeking employment, you can't avoid being "out". They will ask me all these questions, pretend that they support me, but there won't be a place for me anyway. For most people, I'm still too weird. I'm still too peculiar. People don’t want to hire me, "regular" folks don’t want to approach me with romantic intentions. Yes, they tell me that I'm good-looking, interesting, talented, smart, but too unusual, that they don't work with people like me, that they feel kind of uncomfortable to communicate with me closely like with "ordinary" guys and girls. I'm grateful to those people and friends who are by my side, but I’m also encountering everything else, and much more often than I would like.
If you're experiencing the same difficulties in life now or have gone through such period in your lives, I wish you strength and good people on your road. Never give up, and I 'm glad if you' ve already succeeded. Let's inspire each other and the world with our achievements and personal victories!
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Here’s a real Halloween story with some knife-stabbing and face-bashing.
It’s a kind of story that can happen to you if you kindly provide your body to Baron Samedi to ride in for the celebration. And it may even end well if you’re on good terms with the Baron.
For me, like for many other people, the story of Halloween goes back to my childhood. Well, maybe in a not-that-traditional way. Back then, when some people in former Soviet countries first started talking about the holiday but no one really knew what it was about, our rebellious teen souls were instantly inspired by the horror of Halloween. We wanted wild celebrations, flashy and scary costumes, shocking behavior and mystique. And by the way, no one has ever told us about trick-or-treating. The only thing we’ve learned was that Halloween is a dreadful night when you need to wander around scaring other people and doing creepy things.
One year, we celebrated Halloween by painting fences and porches with chalk pentagrams. We truly believed we were such cool bad-ass delinquents. Another year, we wanted to dress as vampires. My friend and I roamed over half a city in search of fake fangs or some face paint, pre-dressed in all black, of course. And of course we couldn’t find any fangs or fake blood. Things like those were hard to find anywhere. They became available about 10 years later, at poor quality for big money, in virtually the only party store in the city. That’s why, for quite a long time, we had to content ourselves with whatever we could find in our make-up bags, black gothic clothes, summoning ghosts and having some drunken fun.
Yes, these days, Halloween is celebrated in almost any bar. Almost every store decorates their windows with cardboard bats. Almost every office has pumpkins and spiders. People get prepared in advance, pay money to make-up artists, throw parties. As a person who organizes events part-time and has some experience in hosting personal parties and charity events, I teamed up with my friends to arrange an atmospheric Halloween party in a small bar. We decorated the room with some of those Halloween trinkets we bought and things brought from our homes, and even made some decor items with own hands. I turned out to have lots of old interior pieces at home that helped transform the bar into a cosy Victorian-era room. We prepared vegan snacks and set the table according to the Samhain traditions.
The main amusements included drinks at the bar and a scavenger hunt game based on Roger Zelazny's "A Night in the Lonesome October". My friends and I played the roles of mystical, fiction, and real-life characters who gave players “keys” for completing tasks and let them pass on through the story: Jack the Ripper, the Log Lady from Twin Peaks, Pennywise the Dancing Clown, Buffalo Bill and me as Baron Samedi…
Baron Samedi’s task location was right at the bar. To be fair, the Baron participated in the preparations and welcomed guests even before the game started. He even had time to get a little tired, warm up his spirit dancing with ladies, and get a piggyback ride from Buffalo Bill... The Baron had lots of good quality rum on the house at the bar and huffed his cigar in an outdoor gazebo. The guests seemed a little wary of him, but didn’t bother much.
Everything seemed to go according to plan, until one of the guests participating in the quest started rampaging. He was brazenly rude to the game masters and refused to complete quests. The Baron got the worst of it because the Baron kissed the guy’s girlfriend. The Baron didn't know or didn't want to know that this girl was with someone. By that time, he already got pretty soused and the rum was all but sipping out of his eyes. And yet, the Baron managed to dodge a blow to the jaw. His top hat didn’t take any damage. The enraged player who kept yelling to claim his ownership of his girlfriend was taken out from the bar.
Later, the Baron learned that the jerk had brought a knife with him and stabbed the Log Lady’s log to express his hysterical protest against the quest. Luckily, the log was merely a printed pillow, and to the Lady's luck, the knife slipped and only cut through the pillow.
When the jerks left the bar, my body simply refused to obey the Baron, belched the rum everywhere and fell face-down into the pillow log. From time to time it even tried to get up and move, but the only thing it could do is listen carefully to what was happening around. At some moment, it responded to guitar songs coming out from the corner of the room, and joined the fun as if nothing ever happened. Although I personally was ashamed of what me and the Baron had done over the night.
And yet, this viscous sensation of fun spreading its dark aura all around like molasses, this incredible vigor and desire to take whatever you want, were well worth it. It’s as if you’re under some sort of protection and you can get away with anything. And you can drink a lot and dance a lot. I'm sure I’d like to repeat the experience of welcoming the Baron.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Today, I’m sharing a cute androgynous look that pays tribute to the Harajuku fashion scene. 
I’ve devoted a huge part of my life to clothes and fashion. Clothes is something many people may treat with contempt, as “rugs” or merely a way to cover their bodies. But I know for sure that clothing doesn’t only influence the way others look at you. It’s also a way for you to express yourself. And this gives you ample opportunities to be creative and present yourself each time you go out. You can use your looks to tell others about your mood, your interests, values and attitudes.
I love Asian culture, as my regular readers might have noticed already. I love Hello Kitty and collect Hello Kitty merchandise. I often get into that sweet, cat-like mood when I want someone to pick me up, stroke me, take care of me. And this is a great way to signal the world about my inner emotions, while not going too far into cosplay or any extremes bound to a certain subculture. That is, of course, if you aren’t a cosplayer or a fan of some edgy fashions. That way you might as well get in character and make older people’s heads spin almost every day)))
Now, let’s throw together our affordable and cute androgynous look. Unisex style is meant to suit people of all genders. Anyone can love cats. There are many Hello Kitty fans on across the gender spectrum. The lines of ‘cuteness’ between the pink and blue factions have long been blurred. Being cute is not a bad thing for anyone, especially with genderless fashion trends in countries like Japan and South Korea. Anyway, it might not be a good idea to overdo it with “girlish” attributes like pretty bows and ruffles.
Here’s a tip for sticking to a low-budget with your looks. Try not to throw away any unique or basic pieces of clothing. I never get rid of such items. They wait in the wings until it’s time they become trendy again with their old-school feel, or until I manage to team them up with some newer items. In this look, I’m using a denim overall I’ve had since school — this way, I didn’t have to buy a new similar model at a rather high price. A casual basic white sweater with a collar in a warmer shade was bought in some dime-store. I’ve had these Timberland boots for years, they’re indestructible. I’ve been vegan for several years now, but I think it’s wasteful and not eco-friendly to throw away things that can still be used. Both the old-school quilted velvet jacket with a leopard collar and a fluffy Hello Kitty beanie were bought in a second-hand store for a total price of about $4. These socks were knitted by my auntie. As for wire-wrapped rings, you can even make them yourself like many Harajuku people do.
And that’s it, nyan. You’re such a cute little star. Especially if you have big eyes and a sweet-looking face.
This is how you can express so many things with a single look. Here I am, sweet, cute, a lover of Japan/Hello Kitty/cats/what else. You can tell at first glance that I might identify as nonbinary or simply like cute unisex clothes. Such a kidult. Lechers go away. That’s how much you can say with your looks if you want to.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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hi! i'm sure you didn't mean any harm by it, but it made me a bit uncomfortable to see you fall back on a stereotypical "boorish butch" idea; i am a nonbinary butch lesbian and it really hurts my feelings to see my identity portrayed as rough and unpleasant. i face enough stigma from people who aren't lgbt and it really stings to be seen as some monstrous thing by people within the community, even. could you please be more careful with wording in the future? butch isn't inherently toxic.
Thank you so much for pointing that out! I really should have been more careful about my wording. English isn’t my first language, and I see now that I’ve used the wrong words. I shouldn’t have used the ‘generic you’ when referring to myself, and add quotation marks when talking about social labels.
I’ll edit the original post now to make myself more clear.
Thanks again and sorry for this misunderstanding!
What I meant to speak of were those stereotypical images people tend to cling to, especially when they meet someone who is way different from them. People expect one to conform to the assumptions they make based on one’s attributes or statements, and let those assumptions obscure who a person really is. As in, "you must be ..." is almost never a guess but an obligation. Hence, all the prejudice and stigma. In Ukraine where I live there aren’t even many people who know what the word ‘butch’ means, and far fewer people have ever tried to wrap their head around the concept of nonbinary gender. As a nonbinary androgyne, I always get frustrated with people to stick a label on me and shove me into a single off-the-shell box. Because for me, being nonbinary is exactly the opposite, that is, breaking the boxes and embracing everything what makes me who I am.
I was only speaking about myself. I didn’t mean to speak of them negatively, but only as labels and roles people try to assign to me, personally. The roles I don't try to conform to anymore. 
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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On International Nonbinary Day, I’m sharing my personal story of embracing my androgyny.
For me, being non-binary means allowing myself to go beyond the frames I don’t fit into, both according to others’ views and by my own choice. And nonbinary visibility is what helps me understand that I'm normal, to come to terms with myself. It helped me realize that I'm not some sort of a bizarre creature, nor a comedy character, nor an unfortunate exception to the rule. I'm a person, like anyone else. A person who is perfectly aware of all the features of their own personality and looks to break free from conventional stereotypes.
Finally, I can be completely free to tell myself that no, I don’t have to stick to labels. I'm not bound to tropes and stereotypes. I can be more than a "masculine lesbian" , a "strong female character" that doesn’t conform, a "campy gay guy" or a "pretentious metrosexual". All these qualities might as well coexist together within me without any conflict, because why would I conflict with my own character traits and the way I live?
The most beautiful thing is that I am who I am. I don’t have to choose among all my unique features. I'm the whole package and that’s what makes me the person who I am, more so than a name or gender assigned to me at birth.
How long had I been thinking that I never wanted to be a girl, to do the things girls do, to act the way most of my peers or adult women did. And at the same time, I hated the idea of becoming a man when I started thinking that I could be a transgender man. At first, I hated myself for the fact that I would never be able to live as a fully functioning man and have sex like cisgender people do. Yet when I imagined myself with a male body, I realized that I didn’t want to live my entire life in that body. I understood that I didn’t want to be a hundred percent man. I knew there were androgynous people, but at that time, the society was so far away from tolerating homosexuality, not to speak of accepting binary transgender people. And for the most part, people around me didn’t seem to have enough emotional intelligence to not treat me as a threat or a broken cog in the system.
Needless to say my desire to use male pronouns for myself wasn’t taken seriously. I looked at myself in the mirror and I saw it, my curvaceous body, sexually appealing by traditional beauty standards, my “pretty” face features, and I was disappointed in myself. I believed that no one would ever perceive me as androgynous, nor as a boy, nor as anyone other than just female body parts. So I tried to socialize as a woman, to make use of this female body of mine, and only allowed myself to be in my natural state when I was at home or with my partners. Some might say, don’t be too soft, everyone does that. Everyone gives in to the rules of this world, everyone wears masks and only let themselves relax when they’re at home. Yet I doubt many people have to play the roles that feel so alien and hated. Even though these roles might have seemed easy at first, since others succeeded.
This incompleteness, this humiliating role, having to be someone I already hated were making it even worse. I didn’t want to go outside, my inner aggression and self-hatred grew inside me tearing me apart. I hated myself and everything I was doing. Everyday, I dreamed of not waking up. Besides, people felt that I was a so-so woman, a strange woman, a woman who doesn’t want to understand what other women do, and doesn’t behave naturally. They saw through me immediately. Well, I know myself that I wasn’t able to get over my feelings to an extent where I could always be comfortable with female pronouns, expectations society keeps putting on women, my female pseudonym and the attitude to myself in general.Everything related to female gender roles was so unnatural to me that it irritated and disgusted me.
When it all went too far, I wasn’t even able to leave home. I was anxious about people not taking me seriously, deeming me insane for using male pronouns while not looking as a bulky masculine man, blaming it all on fanfiction or something like that. Sometimes, I thought the same way, too. I’ve heard them say anyone can live their life normally, settle down, even change their sexual orientation after playing around in their younger ages. They just grow over it, people said. Why wouldn’t I try to pretend that I’m the same? After all, it’s what should make other people around me happy. I started imagining myself starting a heteronormative family, or maybe a lesbian one, and I knew that was it. The best way to dig my own grave and bury myself alive. Childbirth sounded like a sentence. I would never do that to my body, I would never put everything away for the sake of becoming a living incubator. Then, I started imagining living in a male body and all those surgeries to remove body parts or construct an artificial, insensitive penis. Or facial hair growth procedures. I knew for sure that I didn’t want to be a man. I wouldn’t even want to be born as a man. Men’s life experiences are just as far from a fairy tale as female ones.
And yet I knew I wanted to live in-between, break away from being a woman without becoming a man completely. What is that even supposed to be? Is it even possible? Can one survive in this society with such paradigm of thought? Nope, I believed, I must be crazy for sure. And if I’m crazy, if they deem me crazy, then the future holds nothing good for me. What kind of creature am I, not being able to understand who I am, to find a place I belong, to fit in anywhere?
One day, a friend of mine told me they write about people like me on the internet. That such things, have a name and one can say for sure that I’m not crazy. That my identity is one of transgender identities. Moreover, the world wants to know more about nonbinary people, which means there is a chance to be heard, not to be crushed by society, and it’s even possible to embrace the gender you identify with yourself, rather than trying to hide it and get into someone else’s skin. Thanks to the visibility of other nonbinary people, I was able to understand that I no longer had to swing between the two extremes and make painful choices. To tell the truth, I had already stopped trying by that time and lived my life stuck in endless depression, without contact with the world outside, without leaving home. I was sure people like me would never survive and fulfil themselves in a binary world.
When I realized that my androgyny wasn’t just a figment of my imagination but that I could and should always stay true to myself, I set off on my journey to a new life. I started developing my style the way I had always envisioned it, I started becoming myself. Each day, each month, each year I was getting closer to being myself, to finding my place and my voice in society.I managed to step into the light and speak out about who I am and what I want. I stopped being afraid of myself. We’re few in number, but I know for sure that I’m not alone in this world.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Приветствую Ты предпочитаешь партнёрам парня или девушку?
Привет. Я предпочитаю человека, который будет осознавать мою идентичность, не смотря на физиологию. Который будет разделять мои взгляды. Для меня важны личностные характеристики, мировоззрение, характер, умение находить взаимопонимание с партнером. А про любую физиологию можно договориться. 
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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One of my best fashion tips on how to look androgynous is to layer your outfit and to mix together futuristic style, oriental motifs and sportswear elements. For one thing, it’s comfortable. Layers of clothing will make you feel comfortable and protected, in your own fashion, against the cold weather and the scrutinizing stares of people trying to determine your gender. This way, you’ll behave more confidently and your movements will be more relaxed. Flowing fabrics and soft folds will create the right genderless mood, set the rhythm of your gait, and help you get rid of deliberately ‘masculine’ sweeping movements or ‘feminine’ hip-swaying for a more androgynous look. You’ll be soft and comfortable while embracing androgyny. There’s no need to pretend to be someone else. Your clothes will do everything for you.
For another thing, most people already have entrenched ideas on what makes a clear binary gender image. With such a look, you are guaranteed not to conform to any. You simply hover in the “Are you a girl or a boy?” category and calmly ride your own nonbinary wave.
These stretch low-rise unisex joggers by the Ukrainian brand BlackLimit combine both sports and oriental androgynous inspirations at once. They’re extremely comfortable and snuggly. My knee-length oversize Pull-and-Bear tunic goes well with almost all the things of this trend: joggers, skinny pants, or leggings. An incredibly warm shaggy unisex sweatshirt by the Ukrainian brand 452f_official has thumbhole sleeves and a huge cowl collar that can serve as a scarf and even as a hood if desired. It’s a very practical and indispensable thing.
Actually, here’s a fashion tip on how to dress androgynous in the cold fall or winter season. With an outfit like this, all you need do is throw on an overcoat, and even chilly weather won’t hold you back.
And yes, a coat. A neutral, straight-cut, herringbone tweed overcoat is an all-age androgynous fashion must-have in your streetwear wardrobe. There are so many stylish combinations you can create with this coat: harmonize and slightly tone-down the most courageous boho outfit, present yourself as a stylish and strict introvert, or add it to your athleisure outfit and turn yourself into a seasoned, worn-down maverick. In short, never throw away such a coat.
Complement your gender-neutral outfit with comfortable flat-soled boots. Mine have wide neoprene boot tops. Gods, I love black footgear with white soles. It’s always attractive, stylish and completes your image beautifully, literally lifting you above the ground if you’re wearing total black.
Voila — you are a stylish androgynous ninja from the future.
Photo by Nikita Karimov Retouching by me.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Beltane is the time when the nature takes a definite turn towards summer, the time to say farewell to everything obsolete, dead and threadbare. The time to part with It's time to part with things you don’t need, clear your house of trash and clear your heart of strangers, unpleasant people and difficult experiences. If you wanted to break up with someone, then Beltane is the perfect time. If you’re looking for a new love, a new mate, then Beltane is the best period when you can ask for it. Sometimes we need to put a final period to free ourselves from devastating doubt. To free ourselves from obsessive thoughts of the past long dead, from the things that have been haunting us.
Beltane is celebrated the night of April 30 and May 1, when all the fairies, mermaids and other spirits go around freely and see who is filled with love for nature and reverence for the sun, who’s greeting the dawn properly. Similar to the night of Samhain, bonfires should be burning, but they’re kindled with the first rays of the rising sun and burn through to the end. Beltane fire can be used to cleanse and protect your house and yourself. This is generally the perfect time for purification. But it is a time of new meetings and promising beginnings, not the time of whirlwind romance and hasty partnerships. It's better to enter into marriage after a certain stage has been completed and the autumn's harvest is over.
If you don’t have an opportunity to go out into the woods or into the courtyard and light bonfires under the sky, the home version will also suit: use gold, green, red and white candles. Greet the rising sun with fire, celebrate its sunrise and when the morning comes, go to a forest to decorate a festive tree, best of all birch. Write your wishes on colored paper ribbons and hang them on the tree. Leave treats to the spirits of nature and, if possible, leap over the flame. In the past, people used to jump through fire naked, only wearing green wreaths on their heads, so that their long clothes wouldn’t catch fire. If you are brave enough this will be an unforgettable experience. 😁 Let your naked buttocks feel all the warmth of the summer to come. 😁 Actually on this day people traditionally decorate not only trees, but also their houses with greenery and dress specifically themselves in white clothes.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Every time I travel and meet with hotel or resort employees, team members at workshops, or simply local people with whom I come into contact as a customer, guest or tourist, I can't but think about how they will accept me and what I’ll have to face.
After all, people are so different and many of them have never even heard of the existence of non-binary people. For almost all new people I meet on trips, I am the first androgyne in their life. Or at least the first one to introduce myself this way and speak openly on the topic. Each time, they ask lots of questions with genuine interest, without hostility and aggression, about what it means and how to treat me properly. They’re ordinary people who aren’t really passionate about gender issues. However, I’ve never seen any alarm or disgust in their faces. They can’t fully understand me. It’s easier for them to think that I’m a boy. But this is simply because they aren’t used to such concepts and it's still difficult for them to get a hang of the idea and settle into it.
So far, I've only traveled around Ukraine. And I’ve almost never met anyone who would treat me negatively or wouldn’t be ready to work together with me. Maybe I was lucky to only meet nice, calm, friendly people. Perhaps a lot depends on the way you present yourself: how open and self-confident you are, how ready you are to appear and be as friendly as possible, creating a positive image of a sociable person who feels at ease with other people and is not ashamed of being themselves.
I don’t know what they say behind my back. Many of the people I thought were my friends ended up spreading hurtful rumors and accusations once they’ve had a chance to sling mud at me. And seemingly upstanding LGBTIQ+ allies and even activists can do heinous things no matter how positive and nice you act. So, their studied friendliness is no guarantee of sincerity. Therefore, I don’t care so much about what people think or feel about me. They have the right to do this just like any other person. All that matters for me is that their prejudices don't affect affect our cooperation and its results. Let their smiles be fake. Let them get their head full of different ideas and information regarding non-binary people in a month or two. Yet let them not spoil my mood at the moment, let them fulfill their part of the deal, and let us part in good health and with possibly fond memories.
Your image, the image of your community and the influence you have on others are all in your hands.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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For today’s post, I want to share my thoughts and tips on how to find your personal style.
How does clothing reflect personality? How important is it to take care of every detail of your outfit? It depends on whether you want your looks to say who you are, what you carry in your heart, what you think, what you want and what makes you curious.
If you agree that you are what you wear, let what you wear reflect who you are.
How significant is what some people would dismissively call duds or threads? How detailed and multi-layered can your casual looks be, although simple at first glance?
Here’s my example of how to pull off a casual androgynous look that makes a statement. Put on a basic black-and-white checkered flannelette shirt, a top printed with a darksome image of a mysterious winter forest, a weird cardigan with a wigwam pattern, shabby jeans and a parka of an indefinite color — and just like that, a careful observer would find themselves immersed in a world of quiet towns that the gods have long forgotten, where teenagers are found mysteriously dead, where they make damn good coffee and serve cherry pies, where everyone smiles at each other but the smiles hide the darkest secrets.
The details of your look can say far more about you than any labels, slogans and performances. Thus, it makes no sense to copy the others. What makes sense is to be able to express yourself through your looks and let the world know more about you.
What does your clothing style say about you?
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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As a non-binary transgender, I define visibility as freedom from anyone's expectations. For me, this means that the society knows and accepts that there are people outside the traditional boundaries of “men” and “women”, and I don’t have to explain who I am to every stranger several times a day.
For me, visibility means not being perceived as “an incomplete gay boy” or “a lesbian girl who haven't worked through her physical dysphoria”, but rather the right to be myself, an androgyne, the one who knows best who I am.
It means that clothing and cosmetics industries, manufacturers of hygiene products, medicine and other necessities reckon with the specific needs of transgender people.
You’re not sick, you don't need to be treated from being yourself. It's just… before, people didn’t know or didn’t accept the existence of androgynous identity and lifestyle. The same way people didn’t know about penicillin or subatomic particles, although they existed long before humans and didn’t appear to fit into fashion trends.
Being visible means knowing that I’m not alone in this world, that i’m not destined for misunderstanding, yet more and more people find the strength to speak out about their non-binary identity. I know that I’m not alone and that I’m definitely not a mistake.
It means knowing that you’re just the way you are, the way you know and imagine yourself. You don’t have to try to reshape yourself based on male or female socialization.
Visibility means the right to be addressed the way you prefer to be addressed. The right not to get upset because of someone’s ignorance or lack of education, and the right to refrain from communication with ignorant people.
Visibility means the right to live a full life as a part of society without having to deal with social rejection and alienation.
Happy International Transgender Day of Visibility!
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Yule is perhaps the most important event of the year cycle. Yuletide is the time of the winter solstice, which we still vigorously celebrate. It’s the strongest tradition that has survived to our days. Yuletide and its customs of greeting the young sun, celebrations of the sun god’s birth, were partially transformed into the official holidays of New Year’s Eve and Christmas. During both winter holidays we are essentially celebrating the same thing, with the same wreaths, logs (in Western tradition), abundant late dinner, decorating evergreen trees that personify eternal life in gloomy winter. We celebrate all these natural cycle dates unconsciously and with no  understanding which rituals we actually follow. But rituals won’t work unless you know what you’re doing, why you do it and what you want. 
Recently one person made me laugh. She told me an old fake tale about the origins of the New Year traditions. In her version trees in the forest were sanctified by the blood of innocent girls in order to avoid some kind of misfortune. I understand that people use horror stories like this for different purposes: to draw attention to their media channel, to “remind” that pagans (all our ancestors, shortly) worshiped the devil instead of building harmonious relationships with nature and environmental energies, and seeking to understand them. 
In fact, it’s traditional to give out something you raised, produced and want to multiply during the next year. People didn’t really sacrifice, as they do in the Abrahamic religions, but they shared their goods, made offerings to the elements of nature that helped them earn, harvest, produce. 
They did their best to complete all the agricultural work in time, say goodbye to everything obsolete, greet the new year openly and joyfully, help the sun burn brighter, give warmth to their peers and the nature. On Yuletide and similar holidays in other cultures our ancestors used items and meals that look like the sun. Of course, they ate meat back then, as now people still kill animals for the holidays. But we must simplify old traditions, change them according to time and our own development. Because it's not someone's blood or meat itself carries the sacred meaning. It’s only the symbol of offering. 
I took apples, tangerines and red candles as symbols. It's no longer possible and necessary to burn the traditional log for all the ten Yuletide days in the fireplace. Therefore, we also change the particular action but leave its symbolic meaning. 
You have to find your Yule log by yourself, you can’t buy it. The wreath should also be crafted with your own hands. I found and decorated the log, just as I did the last Yule. I liked the idea of ​​wrapping it in red paper and ribbons. 
My Yule cats and Yule goat witnessed these witty preparations. And although this happened during my room maintenance, the result was beautiful, and the process turned out quite calm. To sum it up, any tradition can be made peaceful and modern. 
It's great if you can decorate the same pine tree outdoors every year using apples, candy and homemade gingerbread cookies, as they did in ancient times. There’s no need to carry the tree into the house. Branches and wreaths would be enough. You can build the symbol of the evergreen tree with your own hands, there's lots of tutorials online. Also you can find many tips and ways of decorating your home during the festive time. 
 Merry Yuletide, darlings ☉☉ 
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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The sun is growing brighter.
It happens every year
Promising return of light
For sod and oak and deer
Stag King, his mighty antlers
Rising from a drift
Leaps for the hunter's arrow
Just as strong and swift
He knows his time has ended
He is heading to the plain
Where joy caresses memory
Like softly summer rain
New fawn takes his first step,
The buck he will become.
After the time of knowing
A new year has begun.
Happy Yule!
Today is Winter Solstice - the longest night of the year.
The night when the sun defeats the blackness, the night when young Horned God is born from the Great Mother Goddess. He will clear our paths, shed the light, open his arms to all of us. We have stepped from the darkness of Samhain to the new cycle, new year to be spread before us.
If you like fun, cuteness, comfort and everything like that, then winter holidays is the greatest time to enjoy. Since many Christmas traditions come from Scandinavian and Celtic paganism/unity with nature, this is a great opportunity to once again remember the true spirits of the winter holidays, present them gifts and share the fun together. 
So I never connected winter holidays with the birth of Jesus or Israeli faith in Jehovah, the only god. All post-Soviet countries for many years celebrated not Christmas but New Year, which has nothing to do with religion. It carries echoes of pagan traditions (decoration of the tree, giving presents in winter, loads of fun and happy noise). Therefore, I would say that for me it’s natural to link winter holidays with the New Year, feasts, fun, gifts and general sweet atmosphere that Western culture gave us.
I know there are people who hate the commercial side of this holiday. Well, any holiday will have this side, as there will always be people who want to make money on these things, like on birthdays. And you can make any of the holidays enjoyable for yourself the way you like. The main thing is you need to do everything you do consciously, understanding what you are doing and why, and to enjoy yourself and other people. So, I congratulate you on the eve of upcoming winter celebrations, let’s have all the fun we deserve!
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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A very cozy, romantic and carefree androgynous look can be created during the demi-season with its wonderful blurry line between heat and cold, when it’s not hot, and your nose and fingers don’t get red from dampness or frost. Demi-season is a unisex period of nature :)
Take the cut of a classic coat and transfer it to rebellious torn denim. Add a checkered cap and an unprocessed wide scarf of the same color in “Gavroche” style, as my friends tell me. Remembering the vagabonds and juvenile insurgents of the early 20th century, begin to fantasize on this subject. A close to knee-length wine-colored channel oversize sweater will embrace you in the evening when it gets cold, and will pleasantly tickle your skin with its velvet pile. And checkers,as many various checkers as possible, maybe patchwork, even a whole shirt from made of different pieces of tartan. And more patches for pants and coat. Pants should be wide and pocketed. Take it with total freedom and carelessness, so that no one could guess who you were at birth and how old you are.
I do my best not to miss the latest trends even keeping my own style. In this case, accessories with leopard print and platform corduroy sneakers will fit well. In other matters, caps and tartan are also unconditional trends. Combine everything with taste and enjoy the seasons in unisex manner.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Now I resemble sex enough to flag me with no regrets.
But we still have to decide, are the nipples on the right pic female or male presenting? Or maybe they are intersex person’s nipples? Androgynous or agender nipples? Should it be flagged? Should we also flag the nipples of Jesus, I dunno, kids nipples or some classic paintings? It can really break all the moulds of now so narrow-minded Tumblr staff willing to return to dark past from the technology era.
Maybe people with wooden heads should switch to wooden laptops and just imagine that they are online? It seems more useful to me. I don’t want to tell anyone where to go and what to do unless someone starts telling me what I should do, what kind of art should I create and how should I hide it. Yahoo became so dumb and greedy that they came up with banning sex. And art itself. 
Jeff D’Onofrio tries to save kids from art. The kids who create that art, the kids who will never stop being interested in sex and everything related, it’s important part of their lives. And noone is able to protect people from information or free self-expression. But local dumb and greedy staff isn’t really interested in finding a better way to save underage users from actual perverts and molesters. Tumblr staff don’t have guts to make the network safe and track the definite danger. They’ll just clear out users and their content to skip the hard work. 
No problem, pals! Arters and other users who are against this kind of policy will sail away to Twitter and then PornHub, the networks that will provide some comfortable and attractive space for them. Maybe a new social network will arise, the one that allows people to express their interest and create art freely. Unfortunately, it won’t decrease the number of dumbasses and peopel who throw good businesses and ideas away. Who would protect us from that kind of guys?
If they flag this post, I will add it again and again and again. 
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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The latest trends of this year have given androgyny even more freedom in the fashion industry. The multi-layered outfits and combinations of the incompatible give more opportunities to create an individual bright style for a nonbinary person. 
Put on more stuff: for example, you may even have several coats at the same time, tie a sweater over a raincoat, pull a T-shirt over a shirt and appear not a freak, but a fashionable dude. And by all means now we have our favorite prints that were considered a sign of vulgarity and bad taste for many years! Yeah, I’m talking animal prints and the now ubiquitous leopard. 
Yasssss. Get plenty of leopard! 
Surely, I still don’t think you need to overdo. Add some leopard prints of different variations, for example, unusually colored, so you won’t be repetitive. Do your best to avoid going too crazy with your outfit, as if you had been waiting for a hundred years to go out in a full leopard. I prefer to use this print in accessories, small applications, clothing details, sometimes in basic things, if the designer offers an interesting solution. 
And tartan, of course! A lot of tartan and check in their great variety, bright, large and small. I even found total checkered looks. But I still prefer harmonious combinations to madness, so my Topshop checkered sweater here adds a beautiful color hint and makes the look less monotonous and mundane. And if it gets colder in the evening, I can transform it from a colorful accessory back to a sweater. It’s ability to change is what makes a layered look so unique. Any of its components can be moved, interchanged, unbuttoned, knotted, pulled down, like socks, for example, or stretched. 
I love how it went from a bunch of crazy and radical items (ugly sneakers with shining holographic parts, bright socks with dinosaur print, a classic tartan sweater more suitable for Yuletide celebrations, a tattered denim raincoat and gold-framed shades with yellow lenses) to a harmonious and stylish look that does not turn its owner into a freak. This can be achieved by combining discreet basic things with bright elements, reflecting the colors in the outfit’s details, obvious functionality of the clothes (when no one has questions like: did he put it on just to show off? How can one actually move in it?) 
I hope you find this example useful and inspiring to create your own looks.
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trixter-i-am · 5 years
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Looks based on masculine features will perfectly pass as androgynous outfits for people of any sex and gender. Their functionality and simplicity give the maximal androgynous effect, neutralising all physiological and behavioural details.
This casual, easy and by all means unisex look will be great for a walk, public performance or meeting with friends. It’s quite relaxed, but not too loose. It will outline your comprehensive development and interests, and at the same time the wish to be responsible and serious. Jacket, trousers and scarf show it off, and modernity and youth of thought are reflected in in a sweatshirt with retro cartoon print and sneakers with colorful socks.
You often ask me how you can create androgynous looks easy and cheap. This is one of the most suitable options. Pick up a jacket or blazer long enough to reach at least the middle of your buttocks to take the focus off the hips if they are too broad or too narrow compared to the shoulders. Moreover, if your shoulders are much wider than hips, then the blazer should be with without shoulder pads. And try using shoulder pads if you have narrow shoulders and wide hips. Better if it’s not fitted and it doesn’t have chest darts. Especially if you have a noticeable chest. As for the pants. choose straight or narrowed chinos with loose-fitting legs.
It’s great of you maintain the balance, so clothes are not too baggy and not too fit, but simply look free.
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