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beels-burger-babe · 3 years

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Storm Clouds on a Sunny Day

***Oooooo Teen!MC! Thank you for the request @lovevictoire! Now, although I think I'm technically Gen z??? (I could be a millennial. I have no idea). I have like 0 sense of most pop culture and probably won't be able to write that classic gen z chaotic humour properly, so I'm not going to attempt. What I can do is the hurt/comfort aspect of this which I LOVE! So, let's do this. I hope you enjoy it. ((Oh and before I forget *hugs*))***

Summary: MC has always been a happy positive ray of light that brought joy with them wherever they went; at least that's what the brothers and the other exchange students would tell you. But when they suddenly start getting quiet and begin isolating themselves, everyone is concerned.

TW: descriptions of grief.

In the darkness of the Devildom, you were the sun.

Since arriving in the dark, cruel world of the demons, you had reminded them how to smile, how to laugh, how to love. With you around, it was like the brothers had another sibling again. For the other exchange students, you were a breath of fresh amongst all the horror and despair of the Devildom.

In short, everyone had come to love and be incredibly fond of the teenage human that; which is why they noticed instantly when you weren't acting like yourself.

For starters, you had skipped breakfast, which greatly concerned Beel. The friendly giant had to go up and bring you your food afterwards.

He gently knocked on your door with one hand as he held a plate with way too much food on it in the other. "MC? Are you awake? You missed breakfast."

There was a small curse from the other side before he heard some shuffling. The door cracked open to reveal you wrapped in a bundle of blankets. It wasn't until you looked up that Beel got a good look at your face and his stomach dropped.

Your eyes were tinged red with tear tracks stained onto your cheeks. Your bottom lip was still trembling from the effort of not breaking down into sobs. There was not a trace of the sunshine child that you usually were inside of your stormy sad eyes.

Beel's heart broke as you still attempted to give him a small smile and took the plate from him. "Th-Thanks Beel."

He kept a hand on the door to prevent you from closing it. "MC, are you alright? What happened?"

Your eyes widened a little and you quickly wiped at your cheeks. "I-I'm just not feeling that well. Can...Can you tell Lucifer I'm taking a sick day?"

Beel nodded as concern grew stronger and stronger inside of him. "Of course. Whatever you need."

You weren't actually sick, Beel could tell that much. What you were was heartbroken. Something had reached into your soul and shattered it into pieces. He to ask you what it was. He wanted to reassure you that everything would be okay. But instead, he let you close the door and hurried back to his brothers.

His brothers looked at him skeptically as he arrived, noting the lack of a tiny human alongside him. It was Belphie, however, who noticed the distressed look on Beelzebub's face. "Beel, is everything alright? You look upset."

Beel simply shook his head and looked over to Lucifer. "MC has asked me to tell you that they would like to take a sick day."

Everyone was instantly on their feet in worry.

"Sick? What kind of illness? I can get any medicine they might need and look up the quickest way for them to recover." Satan quickly stated as he began to move towards the kitchen.

Belphie nodded and picked up his pillow. "If they're sick, they'll need rest right? I'll go up there and help them sleep better."

Mammon moved to go with Belphie. "I'll come with ya. They'll feel better with if their favourite's there with them."

Belphie growled and shoved Mammon as Levi spoke up. "I-I mean, I doubt they'd want to spend the entire day with me, but at the very least I can provide them with some movies and games for entertainment. In fact, it might be easier if we just, um, m-move them to my room."

Mammon and Belphie were now snapping at Levi rather than each other.

Asmo scrunched up his nose in disgust and put up his hands. "Yeah, no thanks. I love MC, but I'll leave you guys to handle all the snot and vomit thank you very much. Tell them when they're healthy, I'll give them a spa day, just the two of us."

Lucifer sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Boys, Beel hadn't even told us what is wrong with them yet," everyone froze and turned to Beelzebub. Lucifer nodded and gestured for him to continue. "As you were saying, Beel."

Beel shifted uncomfortably at the attention. "Right. So, I don't think they're actually sick."

Lucifer rose an eyebrow at this as an air of defence grew around him. "You think they would lie?"

Beel huffed in annoyance and shook his head. "No. I don't think they would. But when they answered the door, they didn't look sick. They looked like they were grieving," everyone breathed in sharply at the statement, but Beel continued. "They honestly looked like they had been crying since midnight. I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't get any sleep at all last night."

Lucifer frowned and finally made a move towards the door. "I, and I alone, will go speak with them. We don't want to overcrowd them. In the meantime, someone please contact Simeon just in case they truly are sick and Beel misinterpreted it," he ignored the several shouts of protest as he walked to your room.

He knocked softly on the door twice before carefully opening the door. "MC? Beelzebub informed me that you aren't feeling-"

Lucifer cut himself off as he saw you hugging your knees to your chest in bed, sobbing your heart out. He quickly made his way over and sat down beside you, gently placing a hand on your back. "MC, what's the matter? I've never seen you this upset before."

You didn't answer. You merely turned towards him and buried your face in his chest as you clung to his shirt. Lucifer quickly wrapped his arms around you and held you tight.

It was almost as if he could feel your sorrow within the sounds of your cries. The way they shuttered and cracked with every inhale and vibrated with pure agony on every exhale. You were trembling violently in his arms in a way that he hadn't felt since-

Since he held his brothers after Lilith's death.

Realization came to him as he glanced over and noticed the lightly crumped picture of you and another human on your side table. His breath caught in his throat and he held you tighter. "Oh MC," he whispered softly. "I am so sorry."

He held you there, letting your tears stain his shirt without a single care. He held you as your sobs softened into sniffles. He held you as your head lolled to the side and you finally gave in to sleep.

Lucifer had been about to fall asleep himself when he noticed the door open. Simeon, Luke and Solomon stood there with equal expressions of concern.

Luke took one look at your tear-stained face before a flicker of fury and angelic protectiveness flashed across his face. He opened his mouth to shout at Lucifer, but was stopped as a hand came over his mouth.

Solomon looked down at him sternly. "They're sleeping, Luke, and clearly in need of it. You don't want to wake them."

Luke huffed and slapped Solomon's hand away before going over to the bed and climbing in beside you and Lucifer.

Simeon pulled out a bag that clinked and clattered from the vials within it. "Satan had said that there was a possibility MC was ill?"

Lucifer sighed and continued to rub circles into your back while Luke gently dried your face with a handkerchief. "Unfortunately it seems the only illness they have is a broken heart." He nodded to the picture on the nightstand. "They appear to have lost someone. Today must be an anniversary of some sort that reminded them of it."

Both Solomon and Simeon's faces softened at the explanation. Simeon put the bag away. "I'm afraid I don't have anything that can help with that."

Solomon nodded. "It's a feeling I believe we are all familiar with," he stood in silent thought before snapping his fingers and grinning. "I know what will cheer them up! Some soup! It most certainly cheers me up whenever I'm upset. I'll go make them a pot right away," he smiled proudly as he left the room, missing the look of horror on everyone else's face.

"Oh my," Simeon began, "I better go supervise and make sure he doesn't accidentally poison them. Luke, do you wish to come?"

He shook his head and hugged you. "I'm not leaving them."

Simeon smiled fondly and glanced up to Lucifer who shrugged. "So long as he doesn't mind being the presence of a demon, I suppose he can stay."

Luke grumbled and continued looking at your hand as he held his up to it and compared sizes. "If they were able to fall asleep around you and you were able to comfort them...maybe you're not so bad."

Simeon raised an eyebrow in shock and laughed a little. "Well there you have it," he looked back to Lucifer. "I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything."

He nodded and watched the older angel leave.

@thegrimgrinningghost

Although the day was a rough one for you, there was not a second where you felt alone. There was always someone to hold you, to listen to you, and comfort you when you needed it most.

On days when sadness and despair threatened to cloud over the Devildom's only source of sunshine, the lords of the Devildom and your friends would be there to keep you warm until the sun could shine again.

***I hope you enjoyed this cute little comfort fic! Thanks again for the request @lovevictoire!***

TAGLIST

@henry-and-the-seven-lords

@satans-beloved-riv

@cosmixbun

@sufzku

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janetbrown711 · 3 years

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"If I die, I'm never speaking to you again" - Wakko

Yakko had never considered himself the lucky type, which was hard to refute looking back at his past, but ever since Dot got sick, every time she lasted the night felt like a miracle.

Scratchnsniff had been ultimately been right, staying there for three days did a lot to revive Dot’s spirits, though it was still clear she was still sick. It was just... better now. She wasn’t sweating and shivering uncontrollably anymore.

The list of foods the doctor gave him wasn’t totally unreasonable, they were affordable and were often in the market. However, Dot had a tendency to be a picky eater, and since taste and healthiness often didn’t correlate, Yakko often had to trick or force her to eat. It was frustrating, but there was no way in hell Yakko was going to let her get away without eating, no matter how much she pleaded. She was losing weight at a frightening pace, she needed to eat. He didn’t care what she wanted. He’d do anything to keep her alive.

And Wakko... poor kid. Wakko seemed just as- if not more- worried about Dot than Yakko was. He spent every day working as hard as he could for money, but the results were starting to get worse. The taxing on Acme Falls increased, and soon the menial tasks Wakko had been doing disappeared, as shop keepers simply couldn’t afford to lose a single ha’penny. Because of that, the amount of food they could buy was becoming scarce, so now they only had stale bread and vegetables for Dot. Everything Yakko and Wakko ate was hunted. However, the lack of business never stopped him from going into town and trying though. Yakko was pretty sure nothing could ever stop that kid from at least trying.

Still, it left Dot feeling awfully lonely. She missed her brother a lot, and was always happier when he came home. Hell, even he was happier when he was home. Goodness knows taking care of a sickly younger sister who would be running around and playing with her dolls one day and then unable to move for pain and coughing the next was damaging to one’s psyche. Wakko was a welcome relief and distraction for the both of them.

“Whatcha thinking about Yakko?” Dot asked as she took a nibble from a piece of her stale bread. Yakko snapped out of his thoughts and noticed both of his siblings had been staring at him, probably for a while.

“The usual,” Yakko shrugged and took a bite of his rabbit meat.

“Sorry,” Dot whispered. Yakko froze.

“Dot, stop that. This isn’t your fault,” Yakko shot her a look. They had had this conversation roughly a million times, but no matter what he said it was never convincing enough. Dot didn’t argue this time, and just nodded her head. Yakko sighed, suddenly not hungry. He handed it to Dot.

“Eat this too, you need your strength,” He said, standing up.

“But Yakko-”

“No ‘buts’ Dot. Eat it.” He looked her in the eyes. “I’m going outside for a moment. When I come back in I expect all of it to be gone.”

Dot didn’t argue, thankfully. Satisfied, Yakko went outside of the small abandoned flower shop and sat down on a bench, feeling the cool air of the early mid-winter night.

It had been two very long months since Dot had first gotten sick, and Yakko hadn’t stopped worrying since. After all, the last time he tried to relax Dot ended up sick. To say he felt guilty was a bit of an understatement. Every time she got worse, he basically spiraled into a ball of worry and never left her side, not even to take care of himself, something he also knew was bad, but he didn’t know how to stop.

Moments like these, where he was able to step outside and just... sit for a moment was nice. It was relaxing (if his mind didn’t wander and spiral, as it just had. If Yakko could have anything in the world, it would be an off switch for his brain).

“Yakko..?” Wakko surprised his brother when he popped his head through the door.

“Yes? Is everything okay?” Yakko said, glancing at the boarded-up window.

“Dot’s fine,” Wakko said, and Yakko relaxed again. “I just... need to talk to you.”

That part surprised Yakko. He gestured for his little brother to sit next to him, and he did.

“Yakko, you know how there hasn’t been any work here for the last week?” Wakko said. Yakko bit his lip, how could he not? He nodded.

“W-well, I heard rumors from the baker that a few towns over there were blacksmiths in need of apprentices and other jobs and I was thinking-”

“No.” Yakko shut him down.

“Yakko, you didn’t let me finish,” Wakko frowned.

“No. You aren’t leaving Acme Falls Wakko,” Yakko crossed his arms.

“Why? I could earn more money out there than I can here,” He argued.

“You’re barely nine years old. You can’t travel by yourself,” Yakko fought back.

“Can too,” Wakko huffed. “You were eight when mum and dad died. You traveled alone.”

“That is an entirely different situation Wakko and you know that,” Yakko shot him a look.

Wakko didn’t back down, asking, “How?”

Yakko thought hard about that.

“Because Mom told me I had to. I’m not telling you you need to go, so you won’t,” Yakko said.

“Yakko, stop being stubborn,” Wakko groaned and pulled at his ears.

“You know we need the money.”

“The jobs won’t be easy- you know that, right? They’ll be borderline exploitative,” Yakko pointed out. Wakko rolled his eyes.

“I know that, but if I go away for a year then you can really save on food and-”

“Hold up- a year???” Yakko stopped him again. Wakko looked away.

“I-i mean... I’d try to come home earlier, but... a year most likely.”

“Wakko, we don’t know if Dot- if... if Dot has a year,” Yakko said, the words feeling like a stab in the chest to admit. Wakko’s ears lowered.

“I know... I just- If I stay you’re gonna run out of money for Dot’s food a-and I can’t be the reason you end up not eating because money is tight,” Wakko couldn’t look at his older brother as he said that. Yakko paused, unable to speak.

Sometimes he really hated how observant his little brother was.

“Wakko... you can’t...” Yakko tried to argue more, but something deep within himself told him that Wakko was right.

“I’ll send any money I earn in the mail so you can keep buying Dot her medicines and stuff, maybe even get her new clothes and blankets,” Wakko explained. “I bet she’d really appreciate that.”

“She’d miss you a lot Wak...” Yakko said. Wakko sighed.

“Yeah... I know. I really want to be here for her if something happens but I don’t know what other options are out there. I’ve thought about this a lot, it’s what I have to do,” He replied.

“That’s evident,” Yakko ran his hands through his fur and sighed.

“I guess... I guess you’re right, Wak,” Yakko admitted.

“You mean you’ll let me go?” Wakko sat up. Yakko nodded and Wakko hugged him in a bone-crushing embrace.

“Thank you thank you thank you Yakko! I won’t let you down!” Wakko smiled up at his brother.

“Thanks for what? What’s going on?”

The brothers froze when they saw their little sister standing in the doorway.

“Dot- I-”

“Are you going away?” Dot asked, clutching her rag doll tightly.

“Now Dot, Wakko and I were discussing it and-”

“You’re letting him?!” Dot’s eyes were now filled with tears. Yakko sucked in a breath, biting his words.

“Dot-”

“No! You can’t go Wakko! I won’t let you!” Dot shouted at him. Neither brother moved.

“Dot, we need the money-”

“I don’t care about the money Wakko! I care about you! You can’t leave me!” She pleaded with him.

“Dot, maybe we should go back inside-” Yakko said, noticing the people around beginning to stare.

“No!!! He can’t leave! I’ll die before he comes back!” Dot sobbed.

“Dot- don’t say that!” Yakko scolded, trying to ignore the stares.

“NO!!! I won’t! If I die I’ll never speak to Wakko again! He can’t leave! He can’t he can’t he can’t!” She was uncontrollably sobbing now, and Wakko’s head was so low you could hardly see his eyes, but Yakko could see the tears streaming down his cheeks.

With a determined breath, Yakko picked up his crying sister and brought her inside, Wakko followed close behind.

“Put me down!!” She kicked and pounded her fists, but she was weak on account of her illness. Yakko set her down once Wakko closed the door.

“Dot, I need you to calm down and let Wakko explain himself,” Yakko said.

“Y-you’re sup-supposed to be on m-m-my side,” Dot sniffled and cried. Well, at least she was kind of calming down...

“Dot... Wakko and I just want what’s best for you. We need to be able to buy your medicine and food so you can stay strong and healthy, but right now it’s hard. There isn’t a lot of work in Acme Falls anymore and Wakko thinks there might be more opportunities outside,” Yakko explained calmly, not sure how much Dot could hear over her hiccupping and crying.

“B-but I want Wakko to s-stay,” She said, a lot quieter this time.

“I want to stay too Dot,” Wakko joined in. “But you need medicine and food, and for that we need money, and I can’t get the money we need here.”

Dot looked at the ground, trying to stop her crying.

“I might die and never see you again...” Dot gave in and cried again. Wakko didn’t hesitate and quickly hugged her.

“I know... that’s what scares me...” He said.

“So d-don’t go,” Dot looked up at him.

Wakko sighed. “I can’t. I have to go. You’ll die a lot faster if I don’t.”

Yakko grimaced. Whether or not it was the truth, Yakko didn’t like to think about how soon Dot could easily... you know...

Dot sniffled and wiped away her tears. “I-i dunno...”

“Dot, please,” Wakko pleaded with her, before getting an idea.

“I’ll write you letters whenever I can. We’ll keep in touch, it’ll be like I never left!” Wakko smiled, glancing at Yakko. He nodded in approval.

Dot then glanced at Yakko. Yakko gave a similar look back, one that suggested “hey, I’m not the one in charge here, it’s whatever you wanna do”, if it translated correctly.

“I-i’ll miss you a lot...” Dot kicked the floor. “B-but if you have to...”

Wakko smiled and hugged her again. “I knew you’d understand. You’re the best little sister ever!”

Dot smiled weakly. “I know.”

Yakko smiled too, glad she still had her sass despite everything.

And so it was decided. Wakko was to leave the following week, spending as much time as possible with Dot- who was doing her best to try and act like she wasn’t feeling terrible and sick. But Dot never got past Yakko, and he made sure to give her more food than normal that week.

Eventually, though, it was time for him to go, and it seemed the whole town showed up to say goodbye. At first, Yakko had been surprised at the turnout, but realized that Wakko had basically worked for all of them at one point or another.

Yakko and Dot waited patiently for their brother to talk and say his goodbyes to everyone- even the mime, who Wakko (and most everyone else) hated. Once he was done however, the train had already pulled up, meaning their goodbyes were going to have to be quick.

“I’m gonna miss you Wakko,” Dot said, giving him the best hug she could muster. Wakko hugged back.

“I’m gonna miss you too, but don’t forget, I’ll write a letter as soon as I can,” He smiled.

“You better,” Dot punched his arm. “Or else I’ll be mad.”

Wakko laughed. “Okay, okay. I got it. I’ll write, or else.”

Satisfied, Dot sat back down and it was now Yakko’s turn.

“So... you’re really going, huh?” Yakko scratched the back of his neck.

“Yep,” Wakko said, bouncing on his heels. He knew it was getting close.

“Just-... don’t do anything stupid. And if anything happens, don’t be afraid to come home,” Yakko said.

“I know, I know,” Wakko chuckled. They had had many conversations with that point sneaked into it several times in the past week.

“I know you know, I’m just nervous. Mom always said to never split up,” Yakko sighed.

“You’re a worry-wart Yakko. You need to relax, you’ll never be able to take care of Dot if you worry yourself sick,” Wakko pointed out. Yet again, Wakko flexed his amazingly strong observation skills.

“I’ll try my best to keep that in mind,” Yakko said, and he meant it.

“Just don’t forget to write- or else I’ll have to come find you and knock the senses back into you.”

Wakko laughed. “I’ll write, I promise.”

Just then, the train’s whistle blew and the conductor made the last call. Wakko winced.

“I’ll be back as soon as possible, I promise. I’ll send whatever money I can every two weeks,” Wakko said, before giving his brother a quick hug and dashing onto the train. He then stuck his head through a window and while the train started to chug along, he waved goodbye to Acme Falls and headed off to hopefully greener pastures.

Dot and Yakko stayed at the station waving goodbye, even after the others had left and the train was long gone. There was a void now where Wakko’s presence had once been and the two felt it strongly.

Eventually, Dot began to cry and Yakko had to carry her back to the flower shop so she could get some rest and conserve her strength.

He was going to have to do that a lot if they were both supposed to make it through the year. But they could do it, Dot was strong, and Yakko could make an effort not to stress himself to death.

They were Warners. They were fighters, and none of them were going to be giving up for quite some time.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

#animaniacs #yakko wakko and dot #wakkos wish #angst #dot warner #wakko warner #yakko warner #feels #tw: illness

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honesthammie · 3 years

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Te amo

I am working on a few of the other prompts and a part 2 to prompt 4 the soulmate au I just recently got another puppy and I still have uni work to do so I'm a bit behind schedule with these and I'm so sorry. Hopefully this little kinda songfic makes up for it.

13th doctor x female reader

Warnings: swearing as usual, fluffy, sad thoughts, twist the original songs meaning, long as fuck.

Probably terrible as its my first songfic

I don't know much Spanish so some of the examples later on are Google translated and I know it can be wrong so I do apologise for any mistranslations

This is based off Rhiannas song Te Amo but I'm switching it up a little. I dont why 13th doctor came into my head when I was listening to it but it gave me this lil oneshot idea so enjoy! The picture is not mine but the rainbow effect added is done by me! Same for the picture later on.

I've been travelling with this amazing alien for a whole year now. The adventures are always amazing if she's there! The others sometimes complain and say its boring, especially on a junk planet but to see her face light up with excitement makes my day and it well worth the dirt we cover ourselves on by the time we are done. And when she finds something that she thought was useful and it turns out, it's not her scrunch is amazing.

Okay, I'll admit it. I'm in love with this alien. I know, weird, a human and an alien together? But I can't help it! I'm completely besotted with her. If she even looks in my direction, my legs go to jelly and I get butterflies. I know, cheesy. But thats exactly how I feel around her. I barely want to touch her because I nearly fainted the last few times. And I fear she may pick up on how I'm distancing myself from her. I don't want to break her heart and leave, the thought of her look kills me as is so I'm trying to get her to kick me off.

It doesn't seem to be working though. I've been distancing myself since I found out about how I feel, which is now 6 months ago and she's trying to get me to be as close as I was with her.

I'll tell her. On one of our amazing adventures but I can't do it straight forward, it's making me sick with anxiety just thinking about it. I'll fancy it up, make her work it out. Whenever we are next to each other and the moment is right, I'll tell her in another language!

I finally get out of bed after I finished writing in my diary. I slip some comfy clothes on and head out to the TARDIS library and hope no one is there, especially her. I'll be distracted and right now, I need to concentrate. I wonder the warm halls, grateful that the TARDIS had considered my preferences. I think the TARDIS likes me more than the others because I talk to her and show her gratefulness for taking us somewhere amazing and I chat to her regularly and I try to involve her in my conversations. The others find it weird, except for the Doctor, she just smiles and joins in with me. Im still learning how to translate her but I think I've sort of got it.

I reach my hand forward and grab the aged bronze doorknob and open to the giant room. There were so many floors that an elevator had to be used to access some of them as the Doctor said "walking would literally take weeks to reach some floors". Thankfully the TARDIS organises them to make them easier to find. I looked forward and saw an interactive map in front of me. My hands touched the screen and many subjects and categories came up. Anything ranging from kiddie tales to straight up smut, I have a feeling either River or Missy are to blame for that addition.

I've never met them but the TARDIS showed me videos from her database and brought books to my attention about them. They both seem very dirty minded people so I'm not surprised those are there. I wonder if the Doctor has ever stumbled upon this section or is it for none Doctor eyes only? If she does know about them, has she ever read one? No, don't go there you stupid brain! She probably doesn't know!

I quickly stop that train of thought and catch my breath. I've never thought about those kinds of things about anyone before. Stupid Timelord, making me go all weird and think dirty things. Now my face is all red, I really hope I'm alone in here. I quickly focus back to the task at hand, finding a new language to learn. The TARDIS seemed to know where to go and blue arrows appeared, guiding me to the right section in what could be a maze.

As I walking, I felt excitement rise within me. What if she felt the same way? What if she was impressed by how far I wanted to go just to say those 3 words? Would her hazel honey eyes sparkle with delight? Would she scronch her nose in amazement?

Before I knew it, I'd arrived at the language learning section and there were many alien languages but the TARDIS seemed to have a better idea of what would be perfect for me as a white hardback book fell off the 4th shelf onto the wooden floor. I picked it up and noticed how smooth the cover was and how old yet unused it looked. The white was a little off, almost a dull cream from ageing which made the gold writing harder to read. The title was simple:

Spanish basics and need to knows.

I did always find Spanish in school fun to learn, more than French or German anyway and I don't wanna stereotype this into a typical French is the language of romance. I never really found it romantic sounding compared to Spanish.

I picked up the book and quickly flicked through to the right page and took a note on my phone as to what the translation was and put the worn book away. I quietly thanked the TARDIS and rushed out of the library and back into my room where I could practice without getting caught.

A few weeks have passed since I picked up the new words and practiced them until I was confident and had the TARDIS' approval that I was saying it right. Today the Doctor wanted to take us to this party in the 18th century and we all decided to dress for the part once we landed.

Yaz was wearing a beautiful black and red ballroom gown, accented with little bows around the bottom and lace cuffs. She had her black hair curled into a ponytail. It was simple and cute, much like her style normally. Graham and Ryan wore similar suits but Graham wore green accents and Ryan wore yellow accents.

I let the TARDIS pick my dress. She picked a black and dark blue ballroom gown with blue roses on the bottom. It had black lace underneath and blue lace as the cuffs. The gown also seemed to glitter slightly in the light making me sparkle very subtly. I put my comfy boots on as you couldn't see my shoes as I walked anyway so why did it matter? With all the running we do, I'm not risking my ankles with heels, thank you very much. I had my (h/c) hair in (fave style). It suited my dress perfectly.

I nearly choked on oxygen when I saw how hot the Doctor looked in her suit. It took me a few moments to realise we match. We both blushed at the realisation. Of course the TARDIS makes us match! No wonder why she was more than eager to help me pick an outfit! Stupid sentient ship, shipping us already!

I quickly cleared my throat and complimented everyone on how amazing they looked but I just couldn't take my eyes off the Doctor for long. She was like a magnet for my eyes. Someone help before she realises!

"Don't we all look brilliant? Perfect for the party! 18th century Yorkshire to be exact! What a great century for you guys. Now then, this party is for Nobles and higher, as per usual in these times. Ryan, I suggest you keep in mind about any racist comments that may come out. But as long as you say your Graham's personal butler, you should be welcomed with little resistance. And Yaz, I want you to be (y/n)'s personal maid. That does mean you'll have to follow your so called "masters" around and do anything they ask unfortunately and Graham, (y/n), please act like the others around you and use them. Unfortunately this is the only way all 5 of us can join the party. You'll be fine as long as you bite your tongues. Now the Noble Edward Collins is the host so be sure to thank him for inviting you, even though you technically weren't. And try not to get too drunk, I know what you humans are like! Now follow me." The Doctor explained. I was going to tell the Doctor today, but I guess, I'll have to wait.

The Doctor opened the doors and we were in a cupboard under some gorgeous marble stairs. As we walked towards the party I noticed some family portraits along the walls. They were a very beautiful looking family. The mother had long blonde hair and pale blue eyes. The father was buff, long brown hair and daring brown eyes. There were two children, a girl and a boy. The girl had long brown hair and sparkling blue eyes, whilst the son had blonde hair and brown eyes. They also had a brown greyhound dog laying by the sons feet. The son must be the host, Edward. He looked not much older than 10 in the last painting but the daughter was no where to be found in the portrait and theu all looked mournful. Is she dead and is that the picture capturing the moment of grief? Why would anyone want that? It's so strange, even for this time period.

The Doctor held me and Yaz close, stopping us in our tracks. My heart was racing at the simple touch. But as soon as the touch was there, it was gone. "I hope its okay with you (y/n) but you're going to have to be married to someone."

My heart stopped for a moment and I nearly choked on air. "What? Why?"

"Because women like yourself would have been married as young as 13 or 14. Now your only choices are me and Graham. You can't choose Ryan as he's supposed to be a butler and you can't choose Yaz as she's your maid. The choice is yours, I just need to know wether or not I should refer to you as my darling wife or not?"

What. The. Fuck.

Why did her even calling me that l, turn me on? Obviously, I'm going to choose her but I'm going to have to perfect my reasoning here.

"As much as I love Graham, it's going to be awkward if I have to kiss him or anything because he's like my grandad! I guess you'll do Timelord. Come on then husband, we don't want to be late to the dancefloor!" I spoke clearly hoping she didn't notice how excited I actually was to have even a hint of a relationship with her. It may be fake but ill take anything when it comes to her.

We arrived at the welcome committee and handed our cards over, aka the psychic paper. We were going as Mr and Mrs (last name). The Doctor was holding my hand this entire time and it's driving me insane. I don't know if she can feel my racing pulse under her fingers but if she can I hope she puts it down to excitement! We walked down the most grandest staircase you would ever lay your eyes on.

First we walked around, greeting everyone as they came up to us or if she dragged me to someone she knew, but not personally. She was cute when she was fangirling over these people. Yaz found it annoying as she just wanted to party but I couldn't help it. The way her eyes shimmer with recognition was more beautiful than any galaxy she could ever take us. Sometimes her eyes flickered with admiration and it did make me have jealousy for just a moment before I remembered, I'm staying with her and they aren't .

As the party moved on we met the host Edward. He looked a lot different than in his paintings. He was around 20 years old now and his blonde hair was below his shoulders. He looked a lot like his father with his muscley build. And he was very charismatic which I did not like as he poured all his charm into the Doctor. Does everyone here know that he's gay or does he see through the Doctors disguise? Either way, it was rubbing me the wrong way. I quickly excused myself with Yaz and walked into the bathroom.

"I did not like him. I do not like this Edward guy. Something about him rubs me completely wrong. He's handsome but something is telling me he knows the Doctor isn't a man."

"I felt the same way. He knows something we don't. Before we go out there again, do you mind if I ask you a question?" Yaz asked. My mind was racing a hundred miles an hour. She knows. The jig is up with Yaz. "How do you feel about her, honestly? One minute you 2 are inseparable, then you distance yourself and now you are a nervous wreck around her! I won't judge but I just want to make sure my theory is correct."

Shit. I guess I really was obvious. Does she know?

"If your theory is about me falling hopelessly in love with the Doctor then you'd be correct. I can't help it. I'm going to tell her how I feel without being completely stupid. I just need a right moment to say it." I spoke with a heavy sigh. Hopefully, Yaz can help create that moment thay I need. She nods her head and opens the door. We walk back to the Doctor and notice Edward has gone to other guests and she was talking to Graham. I looked around and saw Ryan flirting with a pretty lady near the food table. Why am I not surprised?

A few hours had passed and the Doctor seemed bored with standing and talking so I made a plan in my head. I grabbed her hand and pulled her to the dancefloor as the next song came on. I didn't quite know how to dance properly but I knew the basics if it. She has to lead and I simply follow suit. It took a few moments but I got the hang of it with the Doctors help. Soon we were dancing so gracefully underneath the most beautiful candelabra that lit up her face perfectly.

Her hair swayed to our perfect dance ever so gently. Her eyes sparkled with amusement and her lips were in a permanent smile. She even laughed a couple of times. Then as the music slowed down to a pace that was perfect, I grabbed her waist and looked her. My heart was going crazy and my legs were about to buckle but I had rehearsed my lines. I can do this.

"Hey Doc. Its been an amazing time with you but I can't continue this without being honest with you. But everytime I get close, I back down in fear. So I'm going to let you figure it out. Doctora te amo. Entiendo que si no sientes lo mismo y me iré si quieres. (Doctor i love you. i understand if you don't feel the same way and i'll leave if you want.)" I spoke with as much passion and intention as I could. I looked into her eyes and saw her confused and trying to work out what I said. I would find it cute if my heart was beating right out of my chest. "Well, I've had a great time but I'm fucking knackered. I'm calling it night. I'll be heading to the TARDIS if you need me."

"I'll come with ya. I'm knackered as well and we both need each other to undo the corsets and mine is starting to hurt a little bit. How we used to do this for a full day, everyday, is beyond my understanding. As beautiful as we look, I don't think its worth the pain this will bring in the morning." Yaz spoke with a slight mumble as proof of her mental state and finishing with a yawn. I chuckled at her state and walked back to the TARDIS with a small amount of chat along the way.

She is right though. These corsets really do hurt you after a while, I'm glad I chose not to wear heels or else I'll be fucked for in the morning. I would literally scream. I think the Doctor had the right idea in wearing a suit, no pain. I do feel bad for leaving her but I just need some space after basically admitting everything that's been built up within me for too damn long. Maybe I should tell Yaz how it went and maybe she can help determine if the Doctor is happy or not.

We walked back into the wardrobe room and I helped Yaz out of her corset. She immediately sighed in relief. She finished getting herself into comfy clothes and started to untie my ribbon.

"So did you tell her?"

"Sort of. I basically told her everything but in Spanish. I just hope it doesn't change anything, except in a positive way, of course! If she wants me gone, I've told her that it's fine and I understand. She's very socially awkward and as cute as I find it, it may not help me in this situation. Do you have any clues on how she may react once she figures it out?"

Yaz stopped untying my corset for a moment and placed 1 finger upon her chin in thought. Her eyes were almost shut and seemed almost completely black in the light. After what seemed like forever, she took her finger off her chin and beamed a toothy smile. Her eyes sparkled as she remembered something and seemed to gleam slightly menacingly. A smirk replaced her smile soon after.

"There's a few times she's shown affection towards you. And I mean romantic affection. She always chooses to hold your hand over anyone else's if given the choice. She always steps I'm front of you when an enemy threatens to kill us all or hurt us in anyway. When you go wandering around on your own, she's terrified thats she's lost you forever to an enemy we don't even know of!" Yaz starts explaining carefully as if she's worried on how to word it.

"Those are just friendly affec-"

"I wasn't done. I was warming up." Yaz interrupts me as I was about to go into a self deprecating speech on how I'm just a friend to everyone and never a lover. "She always looks to see your face on adventures because she secretly loves your reactions, bad or good. When the Master revealed himself, she looked straight at you for support on how she should react. When she came back from the Kasavin, she ran straight to you and made sure you were ok first before any of us. When we were in the Tsungra medical ship, the first person she asked for was you! Whilst she was unconscious on board the ship, she kept mumbling your name, over and over again. When she saw how gorgeous you looked today, I thought she'd take you right there on the spot! She fucking loves you (y/n)! You're just so unbelievably blind to it all!"

Yaz was almost red with rage. Did she really do all that, for me? The TARDIS mustve read my mind and seemed to hum positively in reply. If everything Yaz said is true then she'll be so happy about it and maybe we can be a thing! But then again, maybe losing so many in a similar position as me will turn her away. Maybe her soul is awry and she's asking why right now.

Once I had gotten changed I went to sleep almost straight away, I suppose all that dancing and social ques having tired me out more than I thought.

I woke up to a soft knock on my door. I rubbed my (e/c) eyes and told them I'd be a few minutes as I've only just woken up. It wasn't until I finished brushing my (h/c) hair that I remembered what happened yesterday. All the panic rushed within me at once and I nearly threw up. I took several deep breaths and opened the door.

"GRAHAM THANK FUCK ITS YOU!" I almost shouted at him. He looked a little bewildered for a moment before he seemed to remember what brought him here in the first place.

"Hello Love, I'm here because Doc wanted to speak with you privately in the library. She says that the TARDIS will guide you to her location. She seemed a little off after you and Yaz left. Did something happen? Is everything ok?" Graham asked cautiously. He must be so confused.

"Sort of. I'll explain more when I get back but what do you mean by "a little off"?"

"Well she seemed lost in all sense of the word. She kept muttering "Te Amo" all the time. She was all over the place aswell. She got me and Ryan back here not long after you guys. Something about not trusting Ryan to not get alcohol poisoning without her around. She hasn't really left the library since if I'm honest. She's been in there for 12 hours. I only know she wants you because she whattsapped me on my phone. Whatever is going on, please sort it out, she's starting to really worry me. She hasn't been the same since that Master guy came around." Graham spoke clearly, albeit confused. I nodded my head and walked in the opposite direction to him and hoped the TARDIS would take me there quicker than normal. I want to treat this like a plaster, rip it off in one go.

Sooner than I realised, I grabbed the all too familiar door knob of the library. I took a deep breath and walked in. A blue line appeared towards the interactive map. I awakened the console and I saw a black screen with a few words on it. It looked like a message with how it was presented.

Hello (y/n)! Don't walk until you calm. Breath deeply and try not to panic. I promise you, all will work out in the end. I see more than you realise and I know my thief better than anyone whoever stepped foot into my being. I know of her main problem about the situation. If she loves you, drink this. It won't hurt, she'll know what it is.

The TARDIS

I should have been surprised by this new knowledge that she could speak to me, in a way, but I've seen so much and I am so tender hooks so I didn't take much notice of it. I quickly sat down and tried to control my breathing. After about 5 or so minutes, I felt calm enough to finally meet up with her and hear what she has to say.

I followed the blue line carefully until I spotted her in a comfy room. She mustve gotten changed at some point as she was wearing her usual rainbow outfit, minus the jacket. She was sat on a deep purple sofa, legs curled into her body. Her shoes were on the carpeted floor underneath her, seemingly forgotten for the moment. There were many books surrounding us from many cultures and spieces. One wall had a cozy wood burning fireplace crackling within the silence that surrounded us.

Her face was scrunched within deep thought. Her eyes sparkling with an emotion that I couldn't quite put my finger on; hope, sorrow or excitement? Her lips had a small smirk gracing them and her teeth had bitten a small part of it. Her hands were holding a book in a way where I couldn't quite see what it was.

I didn't want to disturb her as she looked so ethereal with the warm glow of the fire highlighting her in the perfect way. Unfortunately, it's plaster time and I wanted this sorted sooner rather than later. I took a deep breath took in the picture for memory.

"Hey, Graham said you wanted to talk to me? Is everything ok?" I asked gently and as softly as I could so she was carefully brought out of her little world. I didn't want to scare her. She raised her eyes from her book for a moment and bookmarked the page she was at with a little TARDIS paperclip. She placed the book on the table at the side of her and patted the seat next to her.

As I sat down my nerves were through the roof. She gave nothing away as she stared at me for a minute, as if assessing something about me.

"Why are you so nervous? Calm down. You are right, It is to do with last night. You left pretty abruptly after basically confessing your feelings to me. I was so confused, not just about what you said but about myself and what I wanted to do about you." The Doctor spoke monotonously. Did she mean get rid of me? "I had to first of all, find out what you said, well done on learning a new language by the way, one even I'm not fluent at. I'm guessing the old girl had something to do with that idea. Not that, you aren't smart enough but you don't know what languages I do or don't know."

The Tardis seemed to chuckled at the accusation and I simply nodded my head. "I wanted to buy myself time and to impress you."

"You impressed me a long time ago Miss (l/n). That is just a cherry on top. After I figured out what you said, no thanks to my old friend here, I went through a lot of thinking. I've not been in many relationships and you know my history regarding the ones I have been in. You know, River and Missy? And I have such a bad past with it ending in nothing but tears for me. I always lose those I care for deeply." She spoke with tears spilling from her gorgeous eyes. I grabbed her face gently and wiped away the stray tears that managed to escape their home.

"That was when you were a man. You're a woman now, everything is so different. Relationships can be heartbreaking. I know what you're main problem is and the TARDIS has a solution to that. I just need you to tell me the truth. How do you feel about me? Do you want me to stay or not?" I stated holding the small shot glassed amount of liquid in my hand. The liquid was golden and sparkled slightly in the light. There were specks of orange and silver within it and it was as hot as a nice cup of (hot drink). Her eyes sparkled with hope and shock. Her lips were smiling wide. And she seemed to giggle at the sight of it. She held it for a moment as if examining it like a rare artefact, maybe it was. Either way, I trust her judgement and if she's happy about it, then so am I. Once she had analysed the drink, she practically leapt into my arms and pushed me down on my back. She smelled of custard creams and the TARDIS which was odd but completely her and I couldn't imagine her smelling any other way.

"That does solve our problem! What she has just given you is the rarest liquid in the universe seeing as only one thing in the entirety of space can produce it. That drink is known as the nectar of the chosen ones. It's rare as the race that used to make them has practically gone extinct. There's only 3 left in the known universe and you're living in one. That drink is the blood of the TARDIS. It grants you immortality if you drink it. It is said to resemble your favourite beverage no matter who you are. However, it only lasts 100 years and you must drink it every century or else your body clock will kick in and you will age and be as mortal as you are now." She speaks with a warning as we sit up holding holds.

"I have no problem with that. I would sacrifice everything if it meant I got to call you mine. Just please tell me and I'll drink it." I told her with adoration in my eyes.

She held me close and planted a soft and gentle kiss to my lips. It was short but it sent more fireworks than you can imagine through my body. I knew I had found her. She grabbed my waist and whispered next to my ear:

"Te Amo"

#13th doctor #thirteenth doctor x reader #13th doctor x reader #female reader

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anochuu · 4 years

Text

Rengoku Kyōjurō | reincarnation

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3

⤧Alternate Universe (AU)

⤧Long Shot

⤧Angst

(y/n) watches the yellow-haired Professor giving his daily lectures up front on the podium,something about a famous philosopher like Aristotle.But her mind can't help but to focus only on him not to the lesson.

She sat at the back of the row to conceal herself from being seen,the class is lively as always whenever it is his turn to teach,everybody loves him.

“So does the Pillars...”

She choked a gasp,running her hands down her face with another groan,

Damn it,there i go again! What the hell was that!?

It has been a few days ever since the incident and after that, Rengoku never once approach her personally and to be honest,she kinda gets it.

I would stay away myself after finding out i'm a lunatic who likes to hallucinate a lot

However the dreams still continue to haunt her endlessly in fact,it's getting more brutal. She would wake up in cold sweats right after the man in her dream dies in her arms, she will find herself mumbles stuffs that is absolutely foreign to her regarding of him;especially when she sees Professor Rengoku.

“...i'm sorry.”

Why did he apologised? maybe because he made a mistake when he thought i'm a normal person and now,he stayed away because she mistaken him for her dreams.

In the end, she let things go,acting as if the two never knew each other from the start. Deep within her heart, unexplainable sadness conflicted but she tries her very best to ignore it.

She is just crazy after all

It was last night (y/n) remembers she feels generally unwell accompanied with sneezes,sore throat and coughs all in one package.At first she thought she can ignore it and get better,just a mild cold but things gotten worst when she sat by one of Rengoku’s class again in early morning. It takes another friend beside her to ask if she is sick judging by the pale looks on her face.

She held on until Rengoku announced a 15 minutes break and she can feel her energy is slowly draining out,running so low that her vision went blur for few seconds at times.

“(y/n),are you sure you're okay? you look really,really pale.”

She rests her head on her folded arms propped on the desk, replying softly with a sore burning inside her throat, her nose red from wiping them too many times her friend had lost count

“I'm fine Muichiro,thank you.”

“I don't think so.You can't stop sneezing since this morning,do you have a headache?”

she nods lightly,shutting both her eyes closed,stay unmoved, “a little bit,yeah.”

His pair of turquoise eyes tries to peer into her buried face, “I think you're down with a severe cold,(y/n).You should go home for the day.”

“I can't,” she groans again, voice muffled within her sleeves, “Shinazugawa-sensei will kill me if i missed his class again.”

“I'm sure he’ll understand.Excuse me,sensei.”

“Hm?”

it went vague into her ears ,trying to drift off in hoping to get a short little nap to get better until there are steps approaching them from up ahead,

“What's the matter,Tokitō-san!”

Then her eyes shot wide open upon recognising that voice. When she does, the first thing that came to view was his torso in his usual white shirt. Her eyes travels upward only to be meet with his lively sunset hues already smiling down at the two of them

OH MY GOD I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU MUICHIROOOO

“(y/n) is feeling under the weather today,so she's asking for a permission to go home.” Muichiro explains briefly and she can only stay frozen on her seat

“‘That so! Are you feeling rather unwell,(l/n)-san?” now that his eyes are on her, she can feel her heart racing against her ribcage again. Hearing his voice and sense his presence this close is always comforting yet nerves-wrecking at the same time for her.

“Y-yes..is it okay if i can go home for today?”

Rengoku cocked his head to the side slightly,studying her features that is way too pale unlike any other normal days when he saw her and she looks like she can faint anytime soon.

“Of course! I'll drive you!”

Her eyes widens again, did...she heard him right?

Drive her home?

Like..right now????

What???

It took her a good few seconds to grew flustered, “N-no! It's totally fine! I can take the train or taxi!”

However the professor only laughs, “Nonsense! i'll wrap things up in a minute so mind waiting me down the corridor? It won't be long!”

“Professor,it's really fine! I can go home on my ow-”

“You don't look so good,(l/n)-san, i think it's best if you go home with sensei.” added Muichiro merrily and she stare at him in disbelief

“Besides,what if you passed out on your way back and nobody’s there to help you?”

Ugh

“You are absolutely correct Tokitō-san! We cannot trust taxi drivers easily nowadays! Especially if a defenceless,sick girl like you! Oh ,the worst i can imagine!”

She mentally face-palmed. Persuading someone like the professor needs skills because after assuring him over a thing,then comes another when he catches it the wrong way or meaning; the misunderstanding is strong with this one.

“So please,wait for me! I'll wrap things up now!”

before she can calls him out again, the man shuffles down the small stairs to the podium where he will ACTUALLY announce the whole class lecture is reschedule for tomorrow evening instead.

All for me..

at this point, she is confused. One moment he pulls himself away from her for not knowing the exact reason why.But now he cancels his most favourite thing to do-teaching-just for her.

There is that deja vu again,his amiable,kindness traits were like a nostalgia hits her and that’s what makes the hallucination constantly lashing out on her;it made her want to cry and laugh at the same time,it made her want to long and yearn for him without knowing the person very well.

“Eh..? (y/n)..?” Muichiro watches the got up from her seat and exits the class quietly without being seen by the professor. She trotted her way out from the building despite shaking her head once in a while to shrug off the dizziness.

There is simply just no way she can imagine herself driven home by her professor! That is just madness! Especially when he is the one who avoided her because she has been so creepy to him!

She heave out a deep sigh as she lean her side to the wall for support,her body began to betray her.

“(y/n)!”

Who’s there?

When she take a gander over her shoulder at the echoing voice, the familiar vibrant yellow-haired young man came rushing to her side,

“(l/n)-san! You mustn’t move around too much! What if you faint!?”

That's kinda nice...to have Professor Rengoku worried about me..it's comforting..

She heard him mumble another incoherent words again before she felt his arm wrapped over her shoulders,

“I'll help you walk over to my car so bear with me!”

She only stays silent as they began to walk ,matching his pace with hers.Every of his words spoken is overwhelming to handle, she wanted to cry desperately.

Why?

If you are disgusted by me might as well ignore me,not actually the other way around. This is just adding the adversity to my own thoughts and hallucinations

Being the gentleman he is,Rengoku opened the door to her before running over to the driver seat.In that moment,she takes in the scent that envelopes the her whole being.

It smells just like him;the particular scent that immediately triggers another images,

“Hm? why are you hugging me?”

“Can't i hug my own husband?”

he laughs out loud, “Of course! but can you do it from the front? so i can hug you too!”

When she did,he wraps his pair of muscular arms that would always make her feel safe whenever he pulls her into a warming embrace. She likes to snuggle her nose to his chest,inhaling the smell on his clothes because that is where it smells stronger.

“Can you tell me your address?” his voice snaps her out again,tilt her head to the side to see him already seated with seatbelt on,starting the engine on.

“Ah,yeah..it's 1-12-2 Dogenzaka ,Shibuya.”

The rest of the ride was silent which is surprising because someone like professor Rengoku does not know what quiet is for a man who is loud.So she takes it perhaps he is trying to stay that way because he wanted her to get a rest.

So (y/n) leaned her head to the side,watching the streets and others past her by,drifting to a short nap for a moment because this smell,it comforts her than back in her own room.

When they had arrived,Rengoku still as careful as ever to help her get out from his car,waking her up from her light nap. She had refused his offer for his hand but his eyes watches her every moves from behind intently,still afraid she might fall unconscious all of a sudden;she looks very pale after all.

“Thank you very much,Professor. I also apologise for the trouble.” she bows down as soon as they stopped before the building to her flat.

“It's no problem at all! I can't leave a precious student out of sight when they are feeling unwell!”

“But you cancelled your class...”

“No need to concern yourself about it! I can just pick up where we left it off! Now do you have medicines in your home?”

She nods, “Yes,thank you.”

“Alright then,i hope you’ll get well soon! Order yourself some hot soup and tea to sweat it out! That’s what my little brother always said whenever i am down with a fever!”

He continue to rant when her heart is racing because the thought of him leaving scares her again.

“I'll see you—“

“Wait!” it came out too loud. Rengoku stops,looking down at her,

“Uhm would you like...to have some tea upstairs?”

he blinks again,adding the heat on her cheeks, “I-it's just a thank you for sending me home safely so i..just wanted to repay you.”

Was it too much? i know it is too sudden but i was listening to my heart now,not my brain

“...please..?” she sheepishly looks up, “just for a little while..”

just for a little while i want you to stay with me

In the next moment, Rengoku flash her his grin again ,”If you insist! But i'm afraid i can't stay too long,i have to fetch my brother from prep school after!”

Her heart did a little cheer on the inside,guiding him inside the flat and into her personal space.Now her mind is driving her crazy because did she just invite her own professor in!? What will be the headline news in the university if someone saw us!?

“It's not much but..make yourself at home.” she mutters embarrassedly.Opening the door and lets him in who darts his eyes only in a matter of short seconds,it is as she said, it is not much but it is rather giving him the cozy feeling.

“It's okay! It's quite nice actually! I like it!”

She blushes again, Wow either professor Rengoku is sly or innocent she can't tell which.

She led him to take seat by the small desk on the floor that she use to it her meals most of the time,

“i'll go make us some tea;would you prefer them with milk or lemon?”

“Lemon? now that's totally new!” he lightened up at the idea, “I'll have that one please!”

She return the same length of his smile, “i'll be right back then.” and left for the kitchen on the other side of the bedroom. His bright characters managed to liven up the awkward mood she has and it made her a whole lot comfortable with the thoughts of just the two of them in her place.

Right when he is sure (y/n) is out of sight, Rengoku’s smile drops instantly to a stoic expression. He takes another look around her room from his seat. Then came across the slightly opened window that leads to her balcony, the tip of yellow petals are waving at him just below the window,whispering to him to come closer and take a peek.

And so he did. Rengoku stood up and make his way to the window just enough for him to see few sunflowers fully bloom in pots that it made his heart fell to the pit of his stomach.

It was his limit to break the facade he had put up. In fact it started all with this flower.

“Sorry for the wait! I hope you find the taste not awful,i usually mixed them depends on the time—“

Setting the cups of tea on the desk,ready to serve it to him.But, when she got there,he is just staring out to the window and when she got closer she realised he is staring precisely to her sunflowers that she had attentively tended to carefully. However,what surprises her the most is that Rengoku is sobbing,grasping on the window sill as he cries.

“Wh-what's the matter,professor? What happened?!” Hurriedly, she search his face,trying to see something in his eyes

They waver as he look back to her,but no sooner have she seen herself reflected in them that made her heart skip a loud beat.How earnest they look.

Then Rengoku reaches for her,embracing her fiercely as if to reassure himself that she is here at all.

“Ah..”

She cry out against the strength of his both arms,against the flood of emotions that fills her heart.

“(y/n)...”

She stand,stiff to her ground.The sound of his low voice in her ear gives her goosebumps all over her body.

“Professor...?” She try to say something, but Rengoku only buries his face in her hair,breathing deeply before looking down at her.The sunset hues that made her recall something that she can't quite grasp.

He has such passion,such desire in those eyes of his that she questions again in her own head whether he is the same person she know.

...i...

His head dips low, his chin starting to tilt to one side to take her lips in a slow, passionate kiss

But..

Just before their lips touch, he gasps-his eyes going wide in shock just before he shoves her away,turns around,and run out of the door. He leaves the door wide open,bringing in the sound of the faint busy streets outside.

What..just happened..?

The sensation of his arms around her,of his rough and large hands...she remembers them exactly from those strange dreams.

Eh?

She felt a warm drop of tear stroll past her supple cheek again,wiping them with the back of her hand to see she really just cried.

“(y/n),darling....sweetheart, my precious flame...i have to leave,i love you no matter what passage of time it will be,i belong to you.”

There it is again, he smile was too gentle and too soft that it aches inside,his battered and bloody form is clearly hurting and is trying to take him away from her but despite all that, he is assuring her all will be fine.

Her eyes shifted down to the hot cup of tea on the desk,the steam dances upon,untouched.

Then she looks back to the door again

“Kyōjurō...”

To be continued to Part 3...

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luvdsc · 3 years

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Hey Cat!! I hope you're doing well as always ! 💖 AHHHH huhu I closed the form last Sunday since I've collected enough responses dy! (NOOOOOOOO ToT) I got a total of 221 responses at the end of the week, which is 3x the amount I initially needed! :o I'm beyond grateful and appreciative ToT I've cleaned the data and have proceeded to run some data analysis, but I ran into an issue whereby the scores on the subscales are equal (it has never been reported in past studies! :O) so I'm waiting for my supervisor's feedback on how to proceed. Hopefully it's nothing too serious ToT

Hehe finance is interesting indeed! I just started reading a book on finance for young adults (Rich Dad Poor Dad) and I look forward to learning more from the author's tips! The Coursera introductory course has also made financial terms a lil more familiar, even though it's just the basics and it's really helped w my financial literacy 🥺 I can push myself to study but it's also the numbers and calculations I'm worried of cuz I am rly a nong (idiot) when it comes to numbers * - * it runs in the genes I guess AHAHAHAHA my mom and sister aren't good at numbers either keke

Aww I'm glad yr professor made financial accounting enjoyable and a fruitful experience for you! Some lecturers / professors rly just have that spark in them to inspire ppl and I'm blessed to be surrounded by a bunch of em in the psych department!🥺😭 it truly makes a difference and I'm sure we both are living proofs of that!

After debating for a while, I've decided not to take a minor mainly because I'm so tired HAHAHAHAHAHA and I'll just do my own self-studying and exploration whilst working! Go out and explore the world, live life! Whilst ironically still staying in my room because of the COVID-19 situation in our country (cases are abt 20+k every day :') ) My proposal has been finalized and it's been accepted! It's just that some elements of my proposal is also part of my actual report, so I have some guidance to refer to in terms of structure! :3 and yes don't worry! I got plenty (sometimes a lil too much) rest during the sem break whilst remaining productive! Plus, I got to catch up w some friends and had game nights (maybe too much of game nights hehe) and movie nights w my friends which was truly refreshing! Also cuz I might not see a lot of them again after we graduate so we gotta cherish every moment 🥺😭

I'm a freelance graphic designer for my uni's newsletter! Occasionally, they'd ask us to create both the content and design! I'll place the link to my recent work below if you wanna check it out! UwU I'm trying to incorporate the same practices during sem break in my last sem (current sem) too! cuz yes mental health is so so important and I'm just tired of being academically tired you get me? :(

What makes me most trilled abt learning abt psychology is how to apply it in daily life too! I find it so fascinating and awestruck at how relatable and within reach these things are like wow we can be influenced in such ways?? :o can be both good and bad but imma stick w seeing it as the development and evolution of us humans UwU

Also, the vaccine has fixed my sleep schedule HEHE (another perk of getting vaccination :3) I got some rly good rest and managed to reset my usual sleeping time, thank you science ToT oooo I see I see, we've had cases of nurses injecting empty syringes hence the recording :( but GHIOGHWEOGIOHW I could never do that, I can feel the liquid entering me as it is so that's good enough ToT (* plays Love Talk * I can feel it coming)

OMG YOUR ART PIECES ARE SO BEAUTIFUL, ADORABLE AND ELEGANT! 💖🥺🥰 it must've required a lot of hard-work and effort AHHH thankiew for showing me yr work!! it's truly unique in its own manner despite it's simplicity UwU is there a reason or backstory to yr chosen theme and objects? :3

I just Googled Somi Somi and omg that's such an UwU ice cream AHHHH 💖🥺😭 ice cream is my fav food of all time and it looks like an ice cream haven omg imagine eating it after a loooong hard day's of work ToT and OMG THE SATISFACTION OF EATING THAI MILK TEA ICE CREAM ON A HOT DAY YASSS 😋🤤 hehe if you get the chance to try milk & biscoff, do try it! It's amazing !😍 and ooo i haven't tried alcoholic ice cream before but I will one day!! :3 my alcohol tolerance is rly low though, will I get tipsy over alcoholic ice cream? We shall see UwU (i can only drink half a bottle of apple cider before my face gets red and I start getting a lil tipsy + headache)

and lovie....knowing yr school schedule now...OURS IS DEFINTELY BRUTAL OMG a 3 month long sem break huhu that's only the total amount of sem breaks we get in a year ToT i thought uni was hard but not that hard ToT

Always glad and honored to have you onboard! and AHAHAHAH the contractions about to start soon 👀 I enjoy talking to you huhu you're such a sweet and supportive person 💖🥺🥰😙 huhu for my period cramps, I've been having them since I was 12 ToT my doctor prescribed me some panadols but sometimes I can't even swallow them cuz I'd puke them out ToT I've settled w heatpacks to reduce my reliance on medicine, but I finally got some upgraded and safe to eat medicine from my gynae! She said it's fine to take it every month to keep my womb healthy and apparently my ms. lil uterus is suffering from inflammation, hence the super crazy bedridden cramps :( the upgraded medicine worked for a while, but after time it kinda didn't help either :/ but I realised that exercise rly does wonders to reduce the cramp too (gynae also recommended exercising) so i take walks and do my back stretches more frequently now! my period in the previous months (2 months ago) have been almost painless and bearable, it's so weird not seeing my bedridden ._. when I was in high school, there would always be a day in every month in which I don't attend classes, and that's solely because of my cramps. It just isn't worth suffering in school, plus we don't have a sick room :/ I hope the pain continues to subside! ToT

And ayy internship is also working experience, yr advice would be of great help to me regardless! 🥺 oh yes, I always remind myself that interviews are similar to the speaking test I took for my Cambridge English exams! That kinda help calm my nerves down a lil, but w nerves comes bigger smiles, so I guess it takes on a rather practical form of coping mechanism (sublimation) AHAHAHAHA

WAAAA WHAT A QUEEN you got an offer from every interview?? I aspire to be like you! 💖🥺🥰 huhu skill wise I believe I have lots to prepare esp in terms of case studies, and I perform rly poorly on certain assessments (*ehem * esp those concerning numbers) so I took the chance to study a lil during sem break too ToT but noted on that! I will work on that too and try to maintain that me element in interviews and overall just be myself keke

That's all from me for now! Imma wait for my supervisor's feedback and journey on w my last semester. Bon voyage! Link to my recent work: https://www.instagram.com/p/CTBqGzjr6sN/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link Other works: https://www.instagram.com/p/CPpv-IyM7Gi/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link https://www.instagram.com/p/CL55EG-MbL2/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

hi hello honey bee !!! 💓 omg i'm so sorry for the belated response, i finally got on my laptop 😭 i'm gonna put my response under the cut since it got a little long 🤧

omg 221 responses !!!!! that's so many 🙀 congratulations aaaaa it's amazing that you were able to get 3x the data you needed !!! was it difficult to run data analysis? were you able to solve the issue with the equal scores on the subscales? i hope it didn't create too much additional work for you ):

omg yes finance is really interesting! i enjoyed the classes i took for it :') how is rich dad poor dad? did you learn a lot from it? i know it was a book my prof recommended, but i never got around to reading it 😶 did you learn any helpful tips? and ooo i'll have to look into coursera! yeah, there's quite a lot of terms for finance, and it can be a little intimidating paired with all the math formulas and such, but it's pretty useful imo! how are your financial studies going so far? 💕 omg nong is such a cute word?? i would never think it meant idiot asdkfhlkajsdf omg my whole family is good at numbers and really like math, but i didn't like it 😭 my mom made me study it a lot everyday though rip are the financial calculations getting easier for you as you practice more hopefully?

yessss omg i absolutely agree with this!!!! like you can just feel when a professor loves to teach and is genuinely so excited to talk about their subject, and it just makes the most boring horrible subject into something you learn to enjoy and hate less :') and i'm really happy to hear you have tons of professors like that in the psych department 🥺💗

that's great to hear!!!! 🌷🌷 i'm glad that you're prioritizing yourself and your health, which is so much more important than taking on a minor. what fun subjects have you decided to explore and self study so far? 💞 oh my gosh, the rising cases are so high?? i hope it's gotten better there for you ): are you able to go outside yet?

big congratulations on your proposal being finalized and accepted, lovebug !!!! 🥳🥳 i'm very proud of you and hoping one day i can read your published studies in a scientific journal :') aaaa i'm so glad to hear that you got to rest and enjoy your time with your friends!! i definitely feel that omg i regret all the times i skipped out on movie nights or game nights with my friends because now we're all scattered across the country and the only way we can have them again is over zoom calls 🤧

I SAW YOUR DESIGNS AND THEY'RE GORGEOUS OMG I LOVE THEM SO MUCH !!!! 💖 I'M IN AWE AAAA IF PSYCH DOESN'T WORK OUT, I HOPE YOU BECOME A GRAPHIC DESIGNER 🤩🤩💖 and yes i totally get it ): i really felt the academic burn out when i was in college and it was really difficult at times 🤧 but i hope it's going better for you nowadays, sweetpea 💝💝

omg yeah i absolutely agree !!!! whenever i read about psychology, i keep it in the back of my mind and then when i see something irl that relates to it, i'm like :O amazing. it's so cool to learn about different psych tricks too and see how it works when you test them out yourself and whatnot. and it's really crazy to see how the human brain is so easily influenced at times ??? it truly is an amazing subject !!!

ah what a great side benefit of the vaccine - a better sleep schedule 🤩 i'm happy to hear that your schedule has been fixed 💘 and omg what ??? they're injecting empty syringes wth ????? 😭 that's absolutely horrible, are they getting sued?? lmaooooo that love talk reference askdfhlaksjd

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR KIND COMPLIMENTS 😭😭💗💗 there were many late hours spent in the art studio to finish them, but i'm really happy with the end products :') i thought light bulbs are an interesting subject to do, and my prof said that cutting out circular objects or sculpting them is the most difficult since they're made up curves and not straight lines and i was like ok bet i'm gonna do it aND I'M SO GLAD I DID BECAUSE I REALLY LIKE THEM 🥺 and i love honey bees !!! that's why i decided to paint them and we were supposed to paint them in a combined style of two artists so i tried monet's impressionist style with the short brush strokes and pop art triptych style like marjorie strider 💕

somi somi is sooo good and i just had it again a couple weeks ago :') omg ice cream is your favorite food? :o and YES ice cream is so satisfying after a long day of hard work, like it's such a nice reward to look forward to at the end of day ✨ aaaaa i have to try thai milk tea ice cream one day now !!!!! it sounds amazing 🤩 and YES i must look for places that sell milk & biscoff ice cream !! i have milk ice cream from somi somi, but i need to try to combined flavors 💘 i don't think you'll get tipsy over it !!! it's a really faint taste of alcohol, like i didn't even notice it at first, and i don't think they put very much of it in there! aksljdfhals omg you're a lightweight :o at least that means you save money on alcohol LOL i need like nine shots to get drunk 🤧

your school is too hard 😭 you need more than just 3 months of break !!! 😡 we get a week off for thanksgiving in fall semester and a week off for spring break in spring semester too and then the month long winter break and three month summer break. and we have the one day holidays off too like labor day, memorial day, etc. i can't believe they give you so little time off after working so hard???

asdfhlkajshdlksja loool are the contractions over yet? has it been born? what's the current status, doctor? 👀 i really enjoy talking to you too !!! i'm very sorry for the late responses, work is really taking over all of my time, and i never have enough time to get on my laptop to reply to my asks 😭 and thank you for saying such kind things about me 🥺🥺💝 oh my gosh, i'm so sorry to hear that you have such terrible cramps 😭 i can't even imagine going through that - mine are nowhere near as horrible 😖 do the heatpads help a lot? i'm relieved to hear that you were prescribed better medication though! but yeah, your body does eventually get used to the medication and you have to continue taking stronger meds for it to work, but that's not a very healthy solution /: but i'm really glad to hear that exercise has been helping out a lot!! 💖 hurray for almost painless and bearable periods 🥳 i'm sorry to hear that you had to go through that in high school ): that sounds absolutely horrible 😭 periods are just awful, but it's like i'm grateful that i have my period because that means i'm not pregnant, but also please go away aslkhdfaklsj

omg what was the speaking test for the cambridge english exams like? :o it sounds so formal and a lil intimidating askdjfhalsd do you know of any psych tricks that can possibly help calm your nerves? :')

aaaa yes i did !! i was really surprised that i got an offer from them all because at the time, i was not in the right major and i think i was one of the most underqualified applicants 🤧 one person who interviewed me asked why i withdrew from my engr physics class and i explained it in a kinda funny way but in my head, i was like "oof i'm not gonna get this offer anymore" but then he laughed at my response and told me about how his prof told him he should drop a guitar class he was taking because he was doing very poorly and we bonded over that aklsjdhfkals omg how do interviews for psych jobs go? do you have to discuss a lot of case studies? do they give you a list of possible case studies they'll ask about? :o what sort of assessments do you have to do? good luck on all of your interviews, honey bee 💛 i'm rooting for you, you're gonna do amazing !!!! 💘

omg what did your supervisor say about your case study? and how is your last semester going? are you almost done now? 🌸 (also how have you been? what have you been up to? thank you for taking the time to leave such detailed messages for me, i'm really excited to see all the fun updates in your life, lovebug 🌷🌷)

#asks #jaeismytamtation

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ditch-witches · 4 years

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Insufferable (iv) - George MacKay x reader

(PART 1) (PART 2) (PART 3)

requested: yes/no (this is it. i'm done finally. thank you for your time.)

God bless @/okay.l0z

"Hi! I've been reading your fics and I love them so much bc there's hardly any around. I was wondering if you take insta requests and if so can you do one with George and the reader are like enemies to loves and they have really cute moments but then end up fighting all the time and then it escalates and they end up having sEx and then get together or something bc I will THRIVE IF YOU DO!" ... "Is it bad if I want it long ass?"

pairing: George MacKay x reader

warnings: an annoying ass insecurity moment, mentions of matcha

word count: 1,412

a/n: We wrote this during a sorority's pledge night and thought we were in the middle of a cult initiation ---- Basically the same thing but they didn't offer us any of the blood of previous sisters. #bummed

You laid awake most of the night, staring at the ceiling, deep in thought. What had you done. There was a clock hanging on George's wall near his bed, the ticking seeming to grow louder and louder as you noticed it. Where did the lipstick come from earlier. His duvet was blue, not uncharacteristic for him, but you were pleasantly surprised at how soft his sheets were and that he slept on the side you usually avoided. Did you even love him.

Did you even love him?

What if you had been so wrapped up in passion and rage that it just felt like you did? As your high began to wear off, you wondered why you were even there. George deserved better than someone who wasn't sure. How could he have been in love with you for so long yet he chose now to make it evident? Why couldn't he have told you years prior, when you weren't finally getting somewhere with your career? The horrific aspect of it all was the fact that as soon as the sun came up the next day, the next day of your real lives away from the theatre, George would have the possibility of deciding that he didn't actually love you. Then where would you be? Back in bed with Mark, living out your dreary day-by-day as if nothing had ever happened? As you laid there, thinking about all the possibilities of what could happen, there was still one major thing on your mind: Where did the lipstick come from?

As the sunlight began to peek through the blinds, your heart sank. You felt sick and worried, knowing that at any moment, he could wake up. What would you tell him? 'I don't know what's going on. You deserve someone who does. You deserve someone who wears that shade of lipstick.' Surely not. You turned your head to look at George, his hair sprawled out over his dark pillowcase as he slept peacefully, the covers wrapping around his bare torso. The stripes from the blinds barred across his back, the latter pattern changing every so often as the sun moved behind a cloud or higher into the sky. His face was calm and without the intensity, it holds when he's awake, mainly a difference between when he's deep in thought. He looked younger and almost zen. You itched to know what he was dreaming.

You bit your lip slightly and without thought, picked yourself up out of bed to silently sweep your clothes up from around the room. Guilt weighed on your heart as you took one last look at the boy before you left his apartment. You needed to run, to keep running until your lungs burned and your legs could barely hold you up, something else to give you feeling rather than having to sort your feelings out. So you did, in your new dress and bare feet; you ran.

In the next few weeks, you attempted to gather your thoughts and sort your life out. How could you invite George in when you didn't even have a spot for him? You started off by addressing the fact that you had gotten kicked out of your own show for punching an understudy. You had texted the director earlier begging him to meet up so you could explain the situation in the hopes of smoothing over whatever feathers you had inadvertently ruffled. Thankfully he had agreed.

"Yeah, don't worry about it. I wasn't firing you. I literally just wanted you to calm down."

You thought about his sentence said over a steaming cup of a matcha flavored drink, his rowdy hair blowing frantically around his head as your eye twitched slightly. Your head filled with new script plots and coursework to mix with the overwhelmed unease you experienced whenever George flashed into your mind.

His face, his hands, his voice. Every sacred touch from the man seemed to be tattooed on you, but the thought of him only came to you at night when you were alone with your never-ending stream of consciousness. You thought mainly about what it was like to finally rest in his arms. It had been too long since you hadn't talked to him. Had he forgotten about you? Had he moved on to whomever the lipstick belonged to? You started staying in most nights, catching up on work to keep you busy.

I love you.

Why had he said that? Why hadn't you said it back?

It was in November when you got an email from your local movie theater about a "throwback" night. Headlining was none other than Judge Dredd. You chuckled to yourself slightly, looking at the paperwork surrounding you and---for once---thought fuck it. You deserved a night off. Grabbing your jacket and heading out, you noticed it beginning to snow. You pulled your jacket tighter around you to combat the cold air, your mind briefly drifting to the night when you were stuffed into George's car, bundled up in his hoodie. You were within walking distance to the theater, and after getting your ticket, your seat was even easier to find. Judge Dredd hadn't made it big in the '90s---shocker---so you were honestly surprised that more than four people had shown up to the screening. Sinking into your chair, you felt small. The movie flashed onto the screen and you chuckled to yourself at the opening song, thinking of the last time you had seen the film with your brother.

And George.

The seat next to you creaked as someone settled in beside you. You didn't think to look up, only the thought of why they would have picked that seat when the whole theater was basically free crossed your mind. A familiar scent invaded your senses, your brows furrowing as you turned your head, catching the gaze of George. The two of you shared a look, your heartbeat quickening as the blues in his eyes seemed to deepen. He didn't look sad, his expression still dressed like the day on the street. You wanted to cry, finding it hard not to tell him everything at once. Instead, you turned back to the screen, breathing shallowly. A few moments passed of Sylvester Stalone's voice filling the theater until your hand fell beside your leg, wanting to be closer to George. You didn't look at him again, biting back the emotion threatening to spill over. His pinky reached out for you and you moved to grab his hand in yours, intertwining your fingers with his. He let out a sigh of relief and you took the opportunity to lean towards him, resting your head on his shoulder, the softness of his sweater feeling like home to you. You exhaled a breath you didn't know you were holding in, finally feeling at peace.

"I love you," you whispered.

EPILOGUE.

You slipped your dress on, struggling to get the zipper up, feeling like you had lost your independence. You had been spoiled with a man that would zip you up without being asked. You groaned slightly, tugging your shoes on instead and calling out. George peeked around the doorframe, his eyebrows raised slightly as he tugged at his cuffs. "Do you mind?" You asked, holding up your hair and turning your back to him. You heard him chuckle, walking over to you and zipping your dress up, placing a kiss to the back of your neck. "I feel like a damn beached whale."

George let out an almost snickering response. "I love whales."

"You're not helping." You turned to him, rolling your eyes slightly. His features seemed to soften as he looked you over. He still looked at you like you were standing beside the altar next to him.

You stretched your back. He shrugged. "We could skip?"

"No, last time you said that I got pregnant." You fought not to smile at your own complaint. "I'm done being pregnant. Maybe if you win tonight, it'll be over."

George rolled his eyes, bending slightly to mockingly rest his cheek against your stomach. "Take your time, little one. Mummy's just being an ass."

You pushed him away from you. "Stop corrupting her! I'm supposed to be the favorite parent!"

He crossed his arms, a smirk playing at his lips. "Oh, I beg to differ."

You pushed past him, grabbing your bag as you left the room. "You're insufferable. You know that?"

"Bite me."

#george mackay imagines #george mackay x reader #george mackay #george #1917 imagines #1917 #young au #oscars #imagines

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hunnyuwu · 4 years

Text

Connected // Pt.1 || NCT 127

Summary: Humanity has reduced down to a dystopian wasteland. Women disappear daily, civilians now rely on physical modifications and nodes to feel alive, and the concept of civilization is a far cry from their current state. While the one who reigns supreme is the puppeteer of societal affairs, will a small group of men be able to regain the humanity they once held so dearly when they were young? Or were the doomed for an eternal state of dreary, impoverished slums?

Genre: dystopian, cyberpunk, futuristic, angst, romance

WC: 2k

~ ~ ~

Part I : 008

"How are you feeling, 008?"

A small woman regained her consciousness as she was shaken from her delusional state. She always hated these examinations.

"I'm fine." She stated, wanting to do nothing more than pull the dumb wires and circuits out of her sore limbs. She waited patiently as the examiner in all white, wrote down a few bullet points on a small clipboard.

"You are done for the day, 008. Except, for visiting the girls and the head master, of course. Who will you visit first?"

The examiner assisted the girl with long, wavy black locks out of the machine's system, pulling out about a hundred thick and thin wires that were attached to separate areas of her small frame. The girl became impatient as the process was taking too long.

"I'll visit the girls first, then visit the head master. Thank you for your assistance, 375." 008 started ripping cords out, even if they did sting like no tomorrow, but she was finally free of her mechanical restraints, so that was a win in her book.

"Before you go, 008. I have a question for you."

008 started walking out of the room, but halted when 375 piqued her attention.

"What is it?"

"How have you lasted... here so long? When the others haven't?"

008 thought for a second before a simple little smirk grazed her lips, an odd sight to say the least.

"I think that is a question I will have to answer another day. See you tomorrow, 375." 008 gave a little bow to her companion, leaving the examination facility hastily. She always hated that place. Her 'skin' crawled every time she heard the place even mentioned, never forgetting her first experience in that wretched room.

"How are you, trainees?"

008 entered a large room within a smaller, pristine white building a little further away from the main compound. Why did everything have to be so white? It almost made her sick at the bleakness of it all.

"Good!" The girls all replied, turning their attention to the respected woman on the grounds. They all looked up to her, not only was she a top tier, but she has also maintained her position for years, a feat that only belonged to her. It's not like they wanted to be there, but if they wanted to hang onto a sliver of their lives, they might as well do what they do with dignity.

"What has been the progress for today? Any new recruits among you?" 008 stated sharply, picking up a pile of clean cut white papers, quickly grazing through reports of treatments, part changes, the usual business.

"Today, we have started weapons training, starting with the pulverizers."

008 quickly cut off the lead trainer of the recruits, her eyebrow quirking into a confused frown, "You started with the pulverizers? And how is that working out?" She stated lowly, a threatening growl laced through her simple question.

The trainer visibly gulped, nervous by 008's unrelenting strictness, "It's been..." She trailed off, her body freezing under 008's glare. There was no point in even continuing her report as 008 already knew the answer.

"We start with every day objects, 489. If these ladies can't defend or attack with the bare minimum, then there is no chance of survival for them outside of the barriers. In our world, high tech gadgets are nice, but sometimes there's no time for that. Now, get back to work. I know I've taught you better than this, 489."

489 nervously bowed to 008. Her cold, militarism attitude left her shuddering every time they interacted. She nonetheless had nothing but respect for 008, if you didn't respect her, she would make you do so.

"Good, I'll be leaving. I would like to hear better news tomorrow. Have a productive training, Ladies." 008 ducked, a ton of 'thank you's' and 'yes ma'am's' rung from around the room. 008 went to her next destination within the heart of the main complex. She knocked on a large golden door, a soft 'come in' allowed her to enter the large, gadget laced office.

008 came face to face with the back of a sleek, high-tech office chair, only allowing her to see the top of the head master’s balding scalp.

"Hello, Head Master. I have gone through my examinations and the check in with the girls. Was there something else you would like me to complete today?" She stated softly, her hands instinctively tucked in front of her torso as a courteous way of addressing him. His chair slowly spun around so that she could see the man that she has known for far too long now. The man she wanted to bury into the soil of the earth herself. That day would have to wait.

"Hello to you too, Dear. Please have a seat. You have had a long day." He purred, gesturing to the mini couch in front of his extravagant desk. 008 tucked her bottom lip under her teeth, complying to his wishes. She gently and gracefully took a seat in front of him, sitting exactly like she was taught so long ago.

He simply examined her physique as she stared at the ground. One of the most basic rules of interacting with the Head Master was to never look at him unless asked to do so.

"So, tell me. How have I been dealing with the resistance?"

"Is that something you would like my opinion on, Sir?" 008 stated gently as her back stiffened. He always asked her questions like these that she was afraid he was going to kill her for one of these days. It was only a matter of time she stepped out of line.

"I have always trusted your opinion, Dasom. That is why you have served me for so many years now."

008 gulped, hearing her name being spoken by the Head Master. A name he only allowed himself to call her. Was it endearment? Did he want to feel special to her? Was she particularly special to him? Yes, yes, and yes. She didn't know what his obsession was with her, but whenever he reminded her of her sheer withstanding permanence within the force, it made her heart drop to the floor. When would he finally pull the plug out of her?

She hummed, pondering his serious question, carefully plucking and choosing the precise words she would present to him, "Well, as you have heard, the resistance becomes larger and stronger, slowly but surely. I believe that you have deployed more units recently, Sir?"

He nodded, concentrating on every word she said, "Well, I believe that the increased influx of violence and push back is causing the resistance to attract more attention and following. I think it would benefit with you if you would not deploy more units, but instead, spy on their movements, waiting for the perfect moment to exterminate those who are discovered. They all have one another's backs, Sir, so spying on them would be beneficial to you." She sighed silently after spewing her thoughts. She always regretted giving him her strategic thoughts, she was simply too intelligent. While it helped her live this long, it also came with a great price.

He gave her an endearing smile, folding his aged hands down onto the table.

"Why won't you let me designate you as the tactician, Dasom?"

Dasom forced a smile, gritting her perfectly shaped teeth. She received this offer so long ago, but politely declined ever time, even though he continued to persist with the offer thereafter. She was lucky enough that he gave her a choice to begin with; others never, ever get choices around here.

"That position is above me, Sir. I am very grateful to continue assisting the new recruits through their training."

"Do you intend on betraying me, Dasom?" He said wistfully, walking over to the fully-glass wall that gave a perfect view of the whole city. The neon lights permanently illuminating his enormous accommodation on the highest floor of his personal skyscraper.

Dasom sucked air through her nose, eyes shooting wide. She didn't dare look over at him, not even with his back facing her.

"Never, Sir. I intend on staying loyal to you until the end of time."

"I've never trusted anyone as long as I have with you, and here you are, still beside me. You will continue to follow me until my empire crashes and burns, won't you Dasom?" He cooed, every word dripping with honey, but in actuality, was a constant threat that he inflicted on everyone who worked beneath him.

Dasom felt fear course her body for once, a feeling that she rarely felt. The Head Master simply trusted her too much in such an untrusting, back-stabbing world.

Dasom must survive at any cost.

"Yes, Sir. I will follow you until the very end of time itself."

~~~

"The streets are too quiet today."

"You didn't have to state something so obvious. Stop wasting your breath, Mark."

"Damn, okay then."

The shorter of the two mimicked the older by scrunching up her face and quietly restating what the other said. The two bickered for a little while, scoping their district from the top of a skyscraper with cameras and binoculars.

"Why do you think Taeyong has been so uptight lately?" The younger, Mark, lazily asked while bringing his binoculars up to his eyes, scanning the other side of the block.

"I'm not sure, but I sure as hell wouldn't ask him whatever you do. You know how he is whenever he is upset about something."

"Which is always."

The older gave a strict glare at Mark, but he payed no mind to it. The two were like brothers, but they could barely acted like it anymore; everything was becoming so tense so fast nowadays.

"Ah, he texted us to come back. Ready to go, Johnny?"

"Yep, lemme quickly pack up my shit real fast."

The two headed back to their underground compound, disguised as a zap shop above them. (will be explained later)

"S'up boys."

Mark said while throwing up an awkward peace sign, gaining the attention of a few who were doing various tasks within their underground mole hole. None of them gave a response.

"Oooookay then." Mark puckered his lips into a pout, going to the kitchen to look through their little to nonexistent food supply. They were become flesh and bone fast, so they were going to have to make a supply run soon.

"The streets are clear tonight." Johnny reported to Taeyong, who was going through some documents on his small table in the corner. He didn't believe in private offices, so they had one large common area where most of them did their work.

"Intriguing..." Taeyong muttered to himself, setting down a file that he had been going over and over. He ran a hand through his silver hair, biting his lip as he ushered Johnny to leave him alone.

"Taeyong, I have a letter for you."

Jungwoo happily walked over to the tired male, making said man always wonder how the younger could be so happy during such miserable circumstances they lived in.

"Thank you, Jungwoo." He sent him off before opening the small envelope.

“Who sends physical mail in this day and age?” Tarting whispered as he smoothed out the creases of the paper.

I miss you. I miss you to the point that I wish I could simply forget what you did to me. The hell that you couldn't even bother to save me from. But it's fine; it is easy to live and forget, right?

Love you to the end of time,

No, no it couldn’t be.

Taeyong threw the letter, hands quivering as he rolled his chair as far away from his desk as possible. The members in the common area were startled by Taeyong’s harsh reaction, jumping up in their spots respectively.

Taeyong shot up from his chair, body pin straight as he sneered down at the clean piece of paper limply sitting over his laptop keyboard. Emotions that he hadn’t felt in awhile flooded his system like a tidal wave and he didn’t know how to digest it at all.

He took one look at his members before bolting out of their grounds.

Doyoung was the first to react, cautiously walking over to the slip of paper that had their leader shaken up to the point that he literally left their site.

“What did Taeyong do?” Doyoung whispered to himself, feeling strangely upset by the letter of someone who he didn’t even know.

“And more importantly, who’s BD?”

~ ~ ~

Prologue || Part I || Part II

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theguineapig3 · 6 years

Text

Tales Whump Week Day 4: Accident

“Family Planning”

Tales of Symphonia Words: 3708 way longer than i expected; i need to be Stopped™ Characters: Kratos Aurion, Anna Irving, Noishe Pairing: Kratos/Anna

Anna Irving was the kind of person who wasn't afraid of anything. Kratos had known her for years before the first time he ever saw true, unbridled fear in her eyes. He’d always imagined that moment with him stepping in to defend her from whatever had scared her… so he hadn't considered that he would be the one she was afraid of.

Anna has been especially secretive for a few weeks now.

Kratos wasn't worried at first- after all, this wasn't the first time she had been like this. A few years back, she had planned for months to throw him a surprise birthday party, doing her best to keep her plans under wraps. He had figured it out, of course, but was happy to play along. Their unpredictable life, constantly moving from place to place to keep Cruxis off their trail, was stressful and Anna deserved to have her fun when she could. Besides that, Kratos respected her privacy. When she requested time alone, he always allowed it unless there was a reason to suspect her life might be in danger. Many times when visiting cities for supplies, they split up to avoid drawing attention to themselves. If Anna suggested they keep a low profile by separating for a few hours or even days, Kratos usually trusted her intuition. She knew well the dangers they faced and Kratos was grateful for the keen senses she’d developed while living in the human ranch. He hadn't been given a reason to distrust her.

At least, not until now.

Her attitude and stamina seemed to be deteriorating, and the number of times she refused dinner was starting to get suspicious. At night she tossed and turned to the point that he started to lose sleep as well, and his questions about her wellbeing were met with the same chipper “I’m fine!” every time. Noishe had started trailing especially close to her, whining pitifully whenever she left his side. Kratos began to worry, and while he forced himself to give her the space she wanted, eventually she went on a walk with Noishe after lunch one day and only Noishe returned.

Kratos followed a panicked Noishe over Anna’s usual walking route and managed to find her beside a large oak tree, doubled over and half-conscious. He carried her back to their current hideout and put her in bed, looking her over to see what was wrong. She wasn't feverish, but she was dehydrated, so his first reaction was to give her water. Anna was conscious enough to sit up and drink, but even slow sips of water seemed to exacerbate her nausea. Kratos had seen severe gastrointestinal illnesses product similar symptoms, but he wasn't totally sure what to do.

“How long has this been going on?” he asked as he refilled the glass of water. “When was the last time you were able to keep something down?”

Anna was making a point not to look at him. “It comes and goes,” she answered. “I'll be fine. I just need some rest.”

“Without food to give you energy, resting will only do so much. And if you stay dehydrated like this, you’re only going to get worse.”

Anna frowned, glanced over at the glass of water, and looked back at Kratos.

“Can you get me some juice? I still have a bad taste in my mouth from earlier, so the water isn't exactly helping. And maybe a biscuit too- one of those really bland ones.”

Satisfied that Noishe was watching over her, Kratos moved to the cupboard and fished through their supplies for the hardtack they kept on hand in case of emergencies. She hadn't specified what kind of juice, so he chose an orange from the bag of supplies he’d brought in from Palmacosta the day before, hoping the extra vitamins would help her fight whatever infection was.

But, come to think of it… she’d been acting strange for a long time now. Had she been this ill the whole time? Is that why Noishe was being so attentive? If Anna was having trouble keeping food down, it was no wonder she was losing energy. Why hadn't she told him? She never hid when she was feeling sick. The sooner they identified what was wrong, the sooner they could treat it, and they had come to an unspoken understanding that their pride was not as important as their safety in situations like these. The only explanation he could think of was that she was suffering from something that wasn't curable. But that was absurd- she might be uncomfortable and potentially putting herself in danger from outside sources, but she wasn't dying.

Maybe, then, it was just the opposite.

Kratos’ hand slipped on the reamer, and orange juice and seeds sloshed out onto the counter. He grabbed a rag to clean it up, but his mind was elsewhere. He was trying to reason with himself, trying to rule out his sudden, absurd hypothesis. She would've told him about something like that, he was sure of it! He was mostly sure of it. Okay, he wanted to be sure of it. But the thought wouldn't leave his mind. It also didn't help that when he stopped to review their recent, erm, activities, he realized how little care they'd taken to prevent something like this. It had only been a matter of time before an… accident happened.

Trying to dispel thoughts he hadn't yet confirmed, Kratos thought back to the medicine he’d been considering. Herbal tea was something they kept on hand for such occasions as a good cure-all for sinus, throat, and stomach problems. It would help with her nausea, and he was pretty sure it was safe for- oh, here we go again.

At this point, he might as well be blunt and ask. If it wasn't the case, the worst he might get was a slap and a scolding for being rude. But if it was, then they could discuss it. He could find out why she’d been keeping it from him and what she planned to do. Kratos set a kettle of water on the hearth for tea and poured the juice into a cup to take back to Anna. She was sitting up by this point, and hungrily accepted the biscuits and juice despite Kratos’ warnings to eat and drink slowly. He sighed as he watched her and finally steeled himself to speak.

“Anna, may I ask a particularly stupid question?”

She looked up from her half-eaten biscuit and swallowed. “Isn't that usually my job?”

Her sense of humor was coming back. That was a good sign at least.

“Your job right now is resting and feeling better. I was trying to come up with a diagnosis just with the symptoms I've seen, but I…” He cut off his sentence, not wanting to talk in circles any longer. “Anna, are you pregnant?”

He saw her freeze with the cup of juice still pressed to her lips. Noishe let out a punctuated whine, sending her unease. Anna swallowed the rest of the juice and gently handed the cup back to him.

“I'm… feeling tired. I should get some sleep.”

“It’s two o’clock in the afternoon, Anna. I just need an answer-”

“Didn't you just say that my job right now is to rest? I have work to do.”

She didn't give him a chance to protest, diving back against her pillow and pulling the blankets over her head. Kratos sighed and pulled himself to his feet, trying to come to terms with the situation.

He knew Anna well enough to know that he’d just received a clear “yes.”

Noishe had curled up next to her on the bed, so Kratos went back to the cupboard and looked over the teas they had on-hand. What was good for nausea again? Ginger? Mint? He pulled each container out and looked them over, but he couldn't force himself to think too hard about them. Not when he had so much weighing on his mind. More than anything, he didn't want her suffering like this. He wanted to make her feel better, had to make her feel better. Maybe he could blend them together? If one of the teas was good on its own, then TWO of them together would be even-

Look at me. I'm so flustered, I’m starting to use Anna’s messed-up logic.

Still, he put a little of both in the infuser. Might as well give it a try, at least.

He left the tea to brew and passed the time watching Anna and Noishe curled up in the bed next to one another. It was obvious that she wasn't asleep; beneath the blankets he could see her giving Noishe a good scratch- just below his right ear, if that familiar twitch of his leg was any indication. It wasn't an uncommon scene; Noishe seemed to love Anna even more than Kratos did, and Anna returned the sentiment. For the first time, Kratos imagined a third member of the group curled up in the middle, a tiny child wrapped up in Anna’s arms and resting against Noishe’s soft fur. What would the child be like? Would it inherit Anna’s beautiful brown eyes and dark hair? Her inner strength and optimism? Her boundless enthusiasm for the world she lived in and the people she loved…?

His heart raced from the vivid images, and he had to stop himself before he got too involved. That was a dangerous road to go down, given that Anna was still trying to hide the situation from him. He hadn't worked out why yet, but he had some ideas. It wasn't that she was afraid he’d leave her- no, Anna wasn't the sharpest, but she wasn't that stupid either. And she couldn't hide it forever, given that it would become visibly obvious within a few months. But if she hadn't told him by now, perhaps she never planned to. Maybe she was searching for someone who could safely terminate the pregnancy and hoped that she could spare her husband the pain and worry by leaving him none the wiser. If that was the case, he needed to support her rather than get too attached to those fantasies.

Another thought occurred to him along those lines- was she afraid he’d try to stop her? It was her body, her decision, and with the Desians still pouring resources into the search for the Angelus exsphere, avoiding the physical toll of a pregnancy and the work involved in childcare might be the best course of action for her own safety. But Kratos couldn't be sure what she was thinking, and what she thought he was thinking was an even greater mystery.

After all that thinking about thinking, he finally realised that the tea had been steeping for at least twenty minutes. He stumbled awkwardly over to the teapot and poured a cup for her. It was strong, but perhaps that was a good thing. All he wanted was for it to help.

“Anna, I know you're not asleep. Sit up; I made you some tea.”

She poked her head out from under the blankets and frowned, but sat up anyway. “I'm feeling a lot better. Maybe having something in my stomach helped after all. I don't need any tea-”

“You only had one glass of juice, so I'm sure you're still dehydrated. Just try to drink the tea, will you?”

Anna’s stuck out her bottom lip in a pout, and once Kratos handed her the cup, she made a show of analyzing the scent.

“What is this?”

“It’s, er, my own personal blend…” Kratos looked away, suddenly embarrassed that he’d thrown it together so haphazardly. “Just try it. It should make things better.”

Anna’s frown grew stern and she handed the cup back to Kratos. “I'm not going to drink this.”

“Please, Anna, don't be so stubborn. If it would help, I could put some honey in it-”

“NO, I’M NOT GOING TO!”

She shoved the cup back at him, not even thinking about the temperature of its contents. It spilled across his arm and chest, and he let out a scream of pain that sent Noishe scrambling to his feet. Anna gasped and reached for him, her voice cracking with a pitiful “oh no, no, no, I'm so sorry, I-” but Kratos had already gotten up to retrieve the shards of the broken cup that now littered the floor. He picked up as many as he could and took them across the room to the kitchen area, and as he did so, he heard Anna get up from bed.

“Hey, don't go anywhere. There are still some sharp pieces on the flo- hey! Anna!”

She was already at the door by the time he turned around, and he could hear her sobbing as she ran out into the mid-afternoon sun. Noishe followed, and Kratos shoved the cup shards aside to run after them. The burns on his arm and torso were minor, and could easily be soothed with some aloe later. His concern now was figuring out just what had made Anna so upset- and what he could do to avoid upsetting her like this again.

“...Anna?” Kratos walked around the side of the structure, an old abandoned bunker built into one of the hillsides north of Palmacosta. It was a great place to hide: cool, comfortable, and invisible from any of the main roads, while still maintaining the semblance of a home. Anna loved it and tried not to loiter around the outside for fear that tipping off any passersby of their location would mean they'd have to abandon the bunker altogether. It took Kratos a few minutes to figure out where she had gone, but he eventually was able to follow the sound of her crying to a large tree near the riverbank. Noishe was pacing around the outside, and Anna was curled up inside a hollow in the trunk. As soon as Noishe saw Kratos approaching, he ran around behind him and pushed him closer.

“Y-yes, Noishe, I see her. I’m going, I'm going, don’t push-”

Kratos’ reassurances were cut off as he tripped over an exposed tree root and fell over, grabbing onto the tree trunk for support. He was leaning over Anna, and saw her eyes widen at the sight of him.

He’d never seen her eyes like that before. They were full of sheer terror, the likes of which she had never shown even in the face of Desian experiments and torture. It made her look so small, so young, so vulnerable, Kratos’ wanted nothing more than to step in and protect her from whatever it was that was causing her such fear. Unfortunately, he realized… it was him.

“Get away from me!” Anna yelled, her arms wrapped tightly around herself. “Don't touch me!”

“I’m not… I won’t…” Kratos stepped back and fell to his knees, holding up his hands to show that he had no intention of reaching towards her. “Whatever I've done to scare you, I’m so sorry. Please tell me so I can make it right. I don't want to hurt you- I just want to make things better.”

His posture and words seemed to reassure her, and she relaxed a little. “I…” she stammered through sobs. “...I don't want to ‘make it better.”

“What do you mean? You really want to keep feeling so awful?”

“Yes! I do!”

“Why?”

There was a pause. Anna removed one arm from around her waist in order to wipe away the tears that were flowing faster now. “B-because I… I want to do whatever I can to… protect my baby…”

There. It was the first time she’d confirmed it outright. Somehow, even though he had been certain of it before, this brought Kratos to another level of anxiety.

“Anna, you-”

“Please!” she exclaimed, interrupting him. Her head was bowed so he could no longer see her eyes, but there was still a twinge of fear in her voice. “Please, Kratos, I'll be good! I'll stop being so reckless, I’ll stop getting into fights and putting myself in danger, I’ll get better rest and eat right and all the things you tell me to do, just… please, please, let me keep him.”

Kratos froze. “I don't understand-”

“I’ll study and learn everything I can about being a good mother! I’ll read all the books I need to, even if they're the hard kind with no pictures! I’ll do whatever I can to keep you from worrying- just let me keep him!”

“Anna, you…” Kratos stammered a reply through his shock. “...you sound like a little girl begging for a puppy. This isn't at all like bringing home a stray dog.”

“I know! I know it isn't! But I still-”

“This is not some stray animal. This is your child. That's why I'd never force you to give it up or to make a decision you were unhappy with. Have a little more faith in me, would you?”

Her face shot up to look at him, and he saw the fear in her eyes replaced by a look of shock. “You…”

“You thought I put something in the tea. That’s why you were so scared.” For the first time in countless centuries, Kratos actually had to choke back tears. “How could you think I was capable of doing something like that to you? To anyone?”

“I… I just…”

“No, I shouldn’t have said it like that. With the things I've done in the past, I shouldn't be offended by those sorts of assumptions.”

“It's not like that!” Anna crawled out from her hollow and threw her arms around him. He let out a pained gasp as she touched his chest where he’d been burned, and she pulled back. “I'm so sorry. I panicked, that’s all. But I didn't think you’d hurt me- not really. I just…”

Kratos pulled Anna so that she was sitting in his lap, allowing her to put her arms around his shoulders and lean against the good side of his chest. It felt good to have her close again, to know she was still comfortable being close to him. The idea that he would poison her, poison their child, had hit him too hard, and he didn’t want to be too forward with her until he was sure she was no longer afraid of him.

“...remember about a year ago, when we rescued that little girl from the Desians?” Anna asked as she spoke up again. “I suggested we adopt her more out of guilt that we couldn't save her parents than anything else, but you shut down the idea so fast that I didn't have time to even consider if I really wanted it. I know you were right, that she’d be better off with that family in Izoold, but even so, what you said stuck with me. You said that it wouldn't be right to subject a child to the kind of life we lead, that the dangers we faced on a regular basis were not situations that a child should ever be in. So, a few weeks ago, when I found out I was… oh, gods, Kratos, I was terrified. I was sure you'd convince me not to go through with it.”

“That's why you tried to keep it a secret?” Kratos asked, placing a comforting hand against the back of her head. “No matter how sick you were feeling?”

“Like I said, it comes and goes…” Anna leaned into his touch and closed her eyes. “I thought that, if I could keep it a secret long enough, then I could tell you when I was far enough along that you’d have to let me keep it.”

“I see. That’s what you were thinking.” It was a flawed plan in more ways than one, but Kratos wasn't in the mood to criticize her. He should be reassuring her. “You weren't completely wrong; I did consider whether or not this was a good idea. But it's not up to me. You're the one who has to decide what’s best for you, and it’s my job to support you through that. And if you decide you want to be parents-” He paused, the word suddenly feeling heavy now that he’d said it out loud. “-then it’s also my job to be the best father I can be. It may be asking a lot, but I want you to trust me.”

Anna leaned against the side of his chest, her voice betraying the tears in her eyes. “I never didn't trust you. I knew you would only do what you thought was best for me. I should've had more faith that my feelings would matter to you as much as my safety did. I’m sorry, Kratos.”

She squeezed him in a tight hug, trying not to touch his chest where it had been burned. It wouldn't have mattered to him if she did, though. He just wanted to keep her close.

“I love you so much, Anna.”

She leaned up and kissed his cheek. “I love you too. And Noishe loves you, and-” She glanced over at Noishe for a moment and then took one of Kratos’ hands in hers to place against her stomach. “-and he loves you too.”

Kratos stared for a moment, the sensation new and different. There wasn't a part of Anna’s body that he hadn’t explored by now, but he felt a sudden rush of nervousness like he’d had years before when it was all still new to him.

Even so, all the emotional turmoil couldn't silence the logical part of his brain.

“Anna… you know that’s your liver, right?” Kratos moved their hands down a little. “The baby would be closer to here.”

“Aw, come on.” She made a show of pouting, but there was an amusement to her words that betrayed her relief at the familiar tone in his voice. “I was just trying to be sentimental. You know I'm no good with that sciencey stuff.”

“And besides that, what's with this ‘he’ business? You can't know the baby’s gender-”

“I'm his mother! I can tell!”

“Anna, at this point in development, even the baby doesn't know what it is yet.”

“Oh? You wanna bet?”

The two continued their playful argument, all too happy to return to their usual light-hearted banter. Noishe stayed beside them, his tail wagging in contentment as he settled down to listen and his eyes never straying from the scene.

Everything wasn’t fixed, but it was at least on the right track.

#my fanfiction #taleswhumpweek #Tales of Symphonia #tales of symphonia spoilers #kranna

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katastroficwriter · 6 years

Note

Ouma: I'm sorry, Kiibo...It's my fault you ended being a weapon to the gorvement... Kiibo: ....It is fine...

Tags: Dystopian AU, Violence

“I’m sorry, Kiibo…It’s my fault you ended up being a weapon to the government…“

“…It is fine.”

In this world, people lived their carefree lives within a great dome. Inside the dome was safe. Peaceful. Normal. It was as if nothing was amiss.

Outside the dome, however, is the complete opposite. Death, carnage, war…all the unpleasant things you could ever think of…are found beyond its walls. The truth is, the world used to be a peaceful place. After a long history of conquests and colonization–the world achieved peace, or so humanity thought. However, due to the rapid depletion of resources, political unrest…tensions between countries eventually led to a set of small-scale wars between countries, until finally, it erupted into a large-scale war known as…

World War V3.

Japan had reverted back to its former nature as a hermit country, but not without any preventive measures of making sure that no outsiders enter the country. It was all for the sake of the people, so everyone can live their everyday lives in peace–blind to all the bloodshed happening Outside. To delude the masses that the world was still a peaceful place. And to make sure it stays this way, those who disrupt the peace…simply disappear.

From an outsider’s point of view, Japan’s currently the most peaceful place to be in right now. However, one of the downsides to this kind of lifestyle is the slow but steady dwindling of resources. Being unable to trade with other countries just like how it was centuries ago, the Japanese Government had to make do with what was available within the country.

Of course, human resources belong to this category as well. With Japan’s only line of defense being the military. Many of them leave the Dome, but only few return. It was only natural that it would be in need of men if they wanted to keep Japan safe. The soldiers who risked their lives day in and day out just to ensure that the people Inside could live peacefully were seen as heroes.

Which is exactly why there are soldiers currently roaming around in the slums. It was the perfect place to look for new recruits. Offer the poor some money in exchange for joining and the army and they’ll bite. And should they die in the line of duty, no one will miss them. No one would cry for them. They were completely expendable, which makes them the perfect recruits.

…Not to mention there were rumors that the recent kidnappings were caused by the army, which makes living in the streets dangerous if you don’t want to be taken away by them. If you belonged to the middle class and live in a cozy home, you’ll be fine. But children on the streets have to make do.

“All clear?” Ouma asked, peeking out of the trash bags.

Kiibo nodded, eyes still trained outside of the alley. “We need to be careful if we don’t want to get caught.”

“Yeah,” the raven haired child moved to dust his clothes before picking up a plastic bag filled with assorted bread he stole together with Kiibo. “We should go, they’re probably starving already.”

The albino looked over his shoulder and smiled. “We can go now.”

The monochrome duo stealthily made their way back to their little hideout, where their friends were waiting for them. DICE. That was what they called their little band of lost children. The original members being Kiibo and Ouma respectively, with Ouma being its leader. They originally meant to be a duo of some sorts but ended up taking in other abandoned children around their age(or younger) and made sure that nothing bad happened to them.

“Welcome back leaders!”

Everyone greeted them with big smiles, which grew wider at the sight of food. They all cheered and gave their thanks by tackling their monochrome leaders to the ground with a hug and some gentle noogies here and there.

To think that it all started when Kiibo first found Ouma collapsed in an alley and helped him get back on his feet, both figuratively and literally and were inseparable ever since. They usually had shifts when it comes to scrounging for their meals. But with the military breathing down their necks, Ouma made sure to take as much supplies as possible so they wouldn’t have to go out too much. The risk of having any of them taken away is too high, considering a good number of them were still new to living their lives on the street. Spending their daily lives fighting tooth and nail to survive while protecting the people who mattered to them. That’s how their days usually went.

However, things started to change when the very people they were trying to protect started getting sick due to the upcoming winter season. Without money, they won’t be able to have them treated. Without warm clothes and warm food, they’ll never get better. It’s bad enough that taking care of their hygiene is hard to accomplish due to their already poor living conditions, and this was a huge concern for the raven-haired leader.

Once everyone was asleep, Ouma pulled Kiibo to the farthest corner of the abandoned warehouse. With a determined look in his face, he whispered.

“I’m going to join the army.”

Cyan eyes widened in shock at the declaration. “The…army? What are you saying all of a sudden, Kokichi…?”

Ouma grabbed the albino by the shoulders, “They offer food, money, shelter, and healthcare, to every recruit’s families. If–if I join, we could offer everyone in DICE a better life. Me alone should be more than enough…that’s why I’m going to leave DICE to you, Kiibo.”

“No.”

“What?” purple eyes stared at the albino in shock. Unused to hearing his dear friend speak in such a cold manner.

Kiibo shrugged the raven haired child’s off his shoulders. “I said no. I can’t let you go through with this, Kokichi. They–we, need you. You’re our leader…that’s why we can’t afford to lose you.”

“What are you talking about? You’re a leader too! You can take care of them even without me,” Ouma grasped the albino by the shirt. “Why are you so against this, Kiibo? I’m doing this for everyone! Are you saying you’d prefer having everyone live like this forever? Do you want them to die because of this, Kiibo?”

The albino flinched before looking down and clenched his fists. “…I…can’t. I can’t do it. I can’t lead them as well as you do, Kokichi. No one can take your place–not even me!”

“…Kiibo…” Ouma moved to hold his hand to calm him down. Doing this always calmed his friend down. “I know you can do it. You were the one who saved me before, what difference does this make?”

“…”

Ouma squeezed his hand. “Come on. I promise to come back. You can hold the big leader position for me while I’m gone. And when I come back, I’ll snatch it right back from you. What do you say?” he smiled.

“S…ry…”

Amethyst eyes widened. “Hm?”

Kiibo lifted his tear-stricken face as he squeezed his friend’s hand back. “I’m sorry, Kokichi…but I just can’t let you.”

“What–?”

Everything happened too fast. At first he was worried for his friend since it’s rare for him to cry, even if it’s just between the two of them. But the next thing he knew, his hand got pulled and bent in a way it wasn’t supposed to and pain spiked up his right arm as half of his face was forcefully pressed against the concrete. It hurts. It hurts. IT HURTS!!!

Ouma wanted to scream, but he didn’t want to wake the others. Especially not to the sight of Kiibo breaking his arm. The raven-haired child resorted to gritting his teeth instead as he cried. Why, why, why is this happening? Why is Kiibo doing this? Kiibo would never hurt him. Kiibo would…never…why would he…

The shorter child fainted as the pain got unbearable–the last thing he remembers was the sound of his bones snapping and his dear friend’s hushed cries of “I’m sorry.”

Kiibo was nowhere to be found the next day.

Everyone was panicked when they found Ouma in a near-catatonic state as he was seated by the wall in the morning. His face was dirtied, and his arm was carefully wrapped in a sling made out of their albino leader’s favorite black and white handkerchief. No one knew what happened, no matter how many times they asked, their raven-haired leader wouldn’t respond at all.

They now knew better than to ask about the albino’s whereabouts after Ouma snapped at them for the first time for prodding too much. But despite his utter refusal to even talk about the missing albino, everyone noticed how well their leader took care of the black and white patterned handkerchief. To the point where he’d start panicking or even get angry if someone ever misplaced it.

Since Ouma couldn’t do any work in his current condition, the other children who were able had to shoulder his usual duties. But without Kiibo’s guidance and Ouma’s cooperation, they were at a loss and finding food was difficult. They weren’t as used to the winding streets of their neighborhood compared to their two leaders, so most of the time, they barely had enough food to eat. And the fact that Ouma refused to eat just so someone else could have a bite didn’t help their peace of mind at all.

It took a little over a month for Ouma’s arm to heal and for him to return to his usual demeanor. Their usual routine settled back into place once he got things back to order and taught everyone the basics. Everything was back to the way it was before, save for Kiibo’s absence. No one was aware of the sleepless nights Ouma subjected himself to, the only thing on his mind was Kiibo as well as questions he never got the answers to. He winced, moving to rub his right arm to ease the pain. He was already more or less healed, but whenever he thought of his old friend, he would feel a sharp pain spread through his arm just like back then. It was more of a psychological kind of pain rather than physical, it was something he’s learned to ignore as the days went by, which is why he never told the others about it. He didn’t want them to worry over him even more.

He was staring out the lone window of the warehouse one tranquil night, his eyes were trained on the artificial moon as he drew slow and soothing circles on his right arm. His breath hitched at the memory of Kiibo hurting him. It hurt. It still hurt. But it’s not supposed to. Why…why would Kiibo do something like that to him? He wouldn’t do something like that without reason. There has to be a reason!

“Where are you…Kiibo?” he clenched his fists as he cried silently. “I…can’t do this without you, either…stupid…!”

It was only months after did they get to hear news regarding Kiibo. It came in the form of a thick, white envelope addressed to their leader. Everyone was confused at first, considering the fact no one should have known that they were living in the warehouse. Which only speaks volumes of the authenticity of the the letter–Kiibo personally left it in the warehouse for them to find.

Inside the letter was a small slip of paper that had what looked like an address scrawled on it along with a thick wad of cash. As soon as the leader saw its contents, everything clicked into place for him. Suddenly overcome with intense feelings he didn’t know the name of, he launched the envelope against the wall as hard as he could, letting the bills spill out of the envelope as soon as it was airborne.

Kiibo had joined the military in his place.

Ouma’s expression darkened, his eyesight was shaking and out of focus and his body was wracked with tremors as soon as he processed such fact. ‘The reason why he broke my arm was to…!”

“Leader, what’s wrong?” one of them worriedly asked.

Ouma’s snapped up to look at his companions. He clenched his fists hard enough to break skin. “…I know where he is now.”

“Huh? You do?”

“Does that mean we can see Kiibo again?!”

“Far from it!” the raven-haired child snapped, eyes widening in shock before he regained his composure. “…It’s the opposite. We…might not be able to see him ever again.”

That was how everyone learned of what transpired about that fateful night that left their precious leader broken and hurt. And even with such knowledge, they found it difficult to blame the albino. The frustration Ouma’s felt had washed over everyone. They were all at a loss.

“What do we…do with this?” the ash-blonde boy asked. “It looks like Kiibo wanted us to go to this address. Not to mention the money…”

Ouma already knew what Kiibo’s intentions were. They were partners for the longest time after all. He should be able to tell as much. But this–how could he accept something like this without saying a word? Then again…with this money, everyone wouldn’t have to struggle with food, clothes, and their hygiene! He…he can’t possibly drag everyone down just because of his own selfish feelings…

Ouma turned around, “…Not now. There are still some military men roaming about. That could be a trap to lure us out. Once the army is gone, we can check the address out.” A twinge of guilt blossomed in his chest. No matter how bad lying to his friends–his family, made him feel, Ouma knew he needed this lie. He needed more time for himself to think things through, to help him heal.

A few more months had passed and now the military was no longer roaming their area. There were more news of missing children spreading among the squatters, however.

‘It seems the rumors had proven to be true,’ Ouma thought bitterly as he led the others through a secret path he and Kiibo found. It was the best way to travel without grabbing too much attention. After all, people would surely be suspicious seeing a flock of street kids enter what may or may not be their new home, right? That right there only spells trouble. The envelope was carefully stashed inside his right sleeve. The weight of it against his arm was a grim reminder to be careful of his surroundings.

“Leader! I see it!”

Ouma’s head snapped upwards, his eyes trained on what looks like a two-storey home. Suddenly he wasn’t sure if they got the right address, and it looked like the others were feeling uncomfortable as well. It felt like they were…outsiders. Like they were trespassing in someone else’s home, despite knowing that the letter stated otherwise. Before hesitation could settle in the young leader’s mind, the door to their ‘home’ had cracked open, revealing the face of a woman in her late 30s.

“Oh! It seems you have finally arrived. We’ve been expecting you, Ouma-kun. Come inside.”

A house, and some guardians to look after them…just how much of a worrywart could Kiibo possibly be?

Ouma took a deep breath before signalling the others to follow. The woman flashed them a warm smile as she stepped aside and let the children enter. Nothing bad will happen–he trusts Kiibo. He knows they’ll be okay.

[Present Time.]

“Leader, are you okay?!”

Ouma turned to look at his twin-tailed subordinate and family, “It’s nothing…I just got scratched a little. Anyway, what’s the status? Why are we still stuck waiting here?”

“From what I’ve heard from conversations between some soldiers…it seems the army is making use of robots to help them in the war. And right now they’re waiting for that unit to regroup here.”

Purple eyes widened at the new information. “Robots…? Huh. Who would’ve thought.”

“Mhm! Also…” The young woman looked around before leaning closely, “We already looked around for him, but it seems like he’s not here. But the others are still checking around just in case we missed him.”

“I see…” Ouma hummed. “He was probably assigned elsewhere. The breach was too sudden after all. They need all the manpower they can get.”

“We’ll be okay, right?” another voice chimed in. They both turned to look at the long haired girl, clutching the hem of her skirt. “…I was supposed to meet up with my friends at the amusement park today…but suddenly…” tears welled up in her eyes. “M-my friends…”

Ouma hastily moved from his seat and engulfed the girl in his arms and rubbed her back. “Shhh…it’s okay. You’ll be okay. We’ll be okay. The army has Kiibo with them. We’ll definitely make it.”

“B-big brother…” she sobbed. She was the youngest in their group–but she had the misfortune of watching her friends get slaughtered by the Outsiders. She would have been next, if the military didn’t arrive on time. Her experience of living in the slums helped her survive for a bit longer since it taught her how to hide from pursuers.

“He’s already here?”

“Yeah. He just arrived ten minutes ago.”

“Alright, we better hand him our report so it would speed things up.”

Ouma instinctively eavesdropped on the conversation of passing soldiers, his hands continued its ministrations on his adoptive sister’s back. ‘Him?’

“Ah, there he is. Excuse me, Captain Iidabashi!”

Ouma froze, and it seems his companions heard it as well. The raven-haired man hastily scanned the vicinity for a certain albino he hasn’t seen in years. The temporary shelter was quite crowded with civilians, so he had to stand on the tips of his toes, trying to get a glimpse of the ahoge Kiibo always sported.

“Leader, wait!”

Ouma didn’t. He couldn’t. He needed to see him right now. He weaved his way through the crowd with ease, eyes focused on the backs of the two soldiers who were heading in the same direction as he was. He got knocked around quite a bit, and even lost sight of the soldiers, but there he was.

The familiar sight of his windswept, snow-white hair, made him feel nervous. Kiibo had his back turned towards him at the time and was conversing with the two soldiers from earlier. Ouma didn’t notice anything amiss until he took a good look at his friend.

Kiibo wasn’t wearing the same uniform as the two soldiers–it wasn’t the fact that Kiibo clearly held a high enough position to be held in high regard. Rather…his body was covered with metal plates, and something about his movements felt a little off.

…Maybe he was overthinking things. It could just be a special armor the government helped the military develop to lessen the casualties in the military. That thought isn’t too far-fetched, considering the fact that the military apparently had robot soldiers fighting with them.

“Hey you! This isn’t a conversation a civilian should be privy to.”

Ouma flinched. ‘Huh…? When did I–?’

He had unconsciously worked towards them.

The albino’s head perked up before turning to look over his shoulder.

Ouma felt his blood run cold as soon as their eyes met.

Cold cyan eyes, pale skin that could be easily attributed to a corpse, dark lines under his eyes–it was Kiibo…but…it…it can’t be, right?

“Kokichi…!” the albino gasped.

Ouma fell to his knees, overwhelmed by too much information. That was it. That was the proof that this was real. Ahhh…his right arm is hurting again…

“Kokichi?! H-hang in there!”

His body was as hard and cold as the steel plates protecting his body. But his voice was just as warm and soft as he remembered.

Ouma fainted from the shock.

When he came to, he was back in his designated room, everyone was there this time. They were all asleep, obviously exhausted from the entire situation, and even more so with Ouma fainting as soon as he saw–

Knock. Knock.

His head perked up at the sudden noise. “Who is it?”

Instead of a verbal response, a slip of paper had slid under the crack of his door. Curious, Ouma carefully moved out of his bed to pick it up.

“It’s me. We need to talk.”

Ouma’s grip on the message tightened to the point of crumpling the paper. He took one last glance at the others before silently leaving the room, shutting the door behind him.

“Not here. I don’t want them to worry.” Was all he said, eyes trained on the ground, refusing to look the albino in the eye.

Kiibo didn’t mind–he already expected such a reaction from the headstrong leader he’s always known. “Understood. I know a place where we can have some form of privacy.”

Kiibo’s stiff manner of speech honestly bothered him. It felt so off. So wrong. “Okay.”

Silence fell upon them, the only sound they could hear were their footsteps as Kiibo led him to the second floor of the shelter.

“…It seems you’ve grown taller than me over the past few years.”

“Huh? Oh…yeah…I guess…” mumbled Ouma.

Their conversation died there and then.

“We’re here.”

Ouma idly rubbed his right arm upon realizing that the albino led him to his own quarters. ‘Some form of privacy,’ he says. His quarters was straight up off-limits to non-combatants. Kiibo urged the raven-haired male to enter his room first before following. The first thing Ouma did as soon as they were both inside, was land a punch on him, catching both of them off-guard.

“Ko–”

“You asshole!” Ouma shouted, ignoring the pain in his knuckles. “How could you do this to me?!” The dam that kept his tears at bay for the past few years had easily crumbled the moment he got a better look at the albino. “You didn’t want me to join the army, and yet here you are now! You fucking hypocrite! You…you better have a damn good explanation for this!”

“…I knew that this would happen as soon as we meet again…” Kiibo murmured as he got up from his place on the floor. “That’s why I sought you out tonight. You have a lot of questions running in your mind, don’t you? I’ll answer all of them, I promise you.”

Ouma looked away, obviously still livid, but nodded anyway. He flinched when he felt cold fingers make contact with his bruised hand.

“But first we need to treat your hand before it gets worse. We don’t have much supplies here, it would be bad if your wound gets infected,” the albino led him to his bed and pulled out a first aid kit from his drawer and carefully disinfected the raven-haired male’s hand before wrapping bandages from his knuckles to the tips of his fingers.

“There,” Kiibo smiled.

He hated how easy it was for Kiibo to defuse his anger with just a smile. But there’s no way he’s going to admit it right at this moment. Once the albino was finished, he murmured out his thanks. The atmosphere grew cold the moment Kiibo returned the first aid kit to its proper place.

“Now then…what do you want to know?”

Purple eyes flicked up and gave the albino a pensive once-over. “…Your appearance. What…what happened to you?”

Kiibo inspected himself before returning his attention to his companion. “Ah. This…is the result of enlisting in the military.”

Ouma perked up at the information. “What? How could–but those soldiers earlier looked normal!”

Kiibo heaved a sigh as he took a seat on the bed, “…That…is something I must apologize for.”

“What do you mean?”

“I lied to you.” His cyan lenses glowed under the dim lighting of his room as he turned to look at the raven-haired male. “…It was a week before I left. While I was mapping out a route for the next supply run we were planning to go on, I heard two soldiers talking. They essentially talked about how the children they were going to recruit are supposed to undergo an experimental program. It was this.”

Kiibo stretched his arm for Ouma to touch and feel. Cold, hard, and lifeless…much like metal. “Building robots from scratch would take up too much of our current resources, not to mention the possible damage and maintenance it would require. And that’s how they came up with this idea where they’ll use the human body as a base, and will just install these parts to enhance our performance. Naturally, depending on how substantial these enhancements were, it would definitely stunt our growth, which is why they waited for our bodies to mature before conducting the operation.”

Ouma pursed his lips as he slowly dropped the albino’s arm. “…Why were those other soldiers normal?”

Kiibo leaned back, eyes on the ceiling. “Due to the escalating tension Outside, the government decided to stop making new cyborg soldiers so the military could focus on the war instead of dividing its attention between the battle and developing soldiers who would no doubt become stressed due to their new condition, which makes them unable to fight in the front lines anyway.”

“Why…did you have to go?” the raven resorted to bite his lip to stop himself from breaking down, which only proved to be futile. “You didn’t want me to enlist because of this, fine! But why did you have to go?!” he moved to wipe his tears on his sleeve. “All you had to do w-was…was tell me. You didn’t have to hurt me! I would have understand!”

Kiibo wordlessly pulled his dear friend into a hug, relieved that the other didn’t make any protest when he did so. “…I did what I thought I had to do. I didn’t want you to be subject to something like that…but what you said was true. If we lived our days on the streets, we would eventually die off one by one, and I didn’t want that. That’s when I thought that…if it’s for you–for everyone, I’ll do anything to keep you safe.”

“I’m sorry, Kiibo…It’s my fault you ended up being a weapon to the government…“ murmured Ouma.

“…It is fine,” Kiibo closed his eyes as he rubbed soothing circles on his companion’s back. “Like I said…I’ll do anything to keep you safe.”

Ouma powerlessly hit the albino on the shoulder. “You stupid worrywart…How many times did I tell you to worry about yourself once in a while…?”

Kiibo blinked a few times before chuckling–something he hasn’t done in years. “I lost count.”

“So…captain, huh. What’s the deal with that?” Ouma took this chance to inspect the interior of his friend’s room. It didn’t have much in it other than the essentials like the bed and the bedside drawer and the study desk. He noted the neat stack of paperwork that rested atop the wooden desk.

“Hmm…” hummed Kiibo. “I’m the last cyborg from the first Cyborg Unit. I’ve had more battle experience compared to the current ones we have right now. Other than battle experience however, I also have the most enhancements recorded in the database. I wasn’t all like this from the start, actually. To tell you the truth, the first thing they ‘enhanced’ was my left leg.”

“Just a leg?” Ouma’s eyes widened.

“It was a test to see how fast I could run even with just one enhanced leg,” the albino continued. “But due to my earlier rookie mistakes and several brushes with death, they had to enhance all the other parts of my body just to keep me alive. Others weren’t as lucky. They either died from the operation or the war itself.”

“…I see.”

“E-enough about me. Tell me more about you guys. How were you doing?” Kiibo didn’t even bother trying to hide his intention to change the subject. They haven’t seen each other in years, they have better things to talk about than war.

Ouma had a lot to tell him. About fifteen years worth of stories!

That’s how the tension between them dissipated, only leaving behind that same comfort they found in each other in their childhood years.

Ouma told him about their awkward days living in a proper home for the first few weeks, the even more awkward days of going to a high school after years of being homeschooled. How everyone smiled more and felt safer living in a home meant just for them.

“I was on my way to my part time job when this all happened, actually…” Ouma sighed.

“Oh…” Kiibo pursed his lips. “What kind of part-time job was it, if I may ask?”

The raven-haired male looked away while rubbing the back of his neck timidly. “…The bakery.”

Cyan eyes glowed in amusement. “Bread, huh. That sure takes me back–”

“Whatever!” Ouma fumed, face flushed from embarrassment rather than anger. “I wanted to…make up for that time.”

“It’s okay, Kokichi, I know you love bread. No need to be shy–”

“S-shut up! When did you start becoming so vocal, anyway?!”

Kiibo simply responded with a laugh.

“Captain, you are needed on the front lines. The Outsiders are making their way to the shelter!”

Kiibo stiffened as soon as he heard his subordinate’s voice in his earpiece. “…I have to go.”

“Huh? Wait why?”

Kiibo hastily made his way for the door, “I need to go. They’re coming. There’s a basement level, take everyone with you there. I’ll inform the other soldiers to start evacuating the civilians.”

“W-wait, Kiibo!” the cyborg turned to look over his soldier.

“What is it, Kokichi?”

“Come…home,” Ouma started. “You better come home with us after all of this!” he pulled the familiar checker-patterned handkerchief out of his pocket, which took the cyborg off-guard.

“Kokichi…so you still had it…” Kiibo smiled. “…I will. I promise I’ll come home.”

While most of his body got replaced with metal parts…he still had his heart. A heart that only beats for Ouma and their precious family.

[Year 0005]

Bing! Bong!

“I got it!” Ouma called, jogging towards the door. He didn’t bother checking the peephole before flinging the door wide open. World War V3 had already ended years ago with the biggest number of recorded casualties compared to the previous World Wars. Right now they were currently on their fifth year of peace since the war ended. The world leaders all decided to reset the calendar–a hard reset to help them start anew. Needless to say, the real sun was hotter and the real moon was twice as beautiful. He honestly didn’t think he’d be able to experience all of this in his lifetime.

“Kokichi…I’m home,” Kiibo smiled.

Ouma was left agape. When Kiibo told him how he was coming home that day, he had expected him in his military garb. But instead, what he got was a more human-looking Kiibo, the only tell-tale sign of his status as a cyborg were his glowing cyan lenses.

“Y-your appearance–”

“Yes, well…they had to uninstall all of my weapons in accordance with the World Treaty,” Kiibo rubbed the back of his neck out of nervousness. “They offered to cover what’s left behind in synthetic skin after that, and I accepted.”

“Ahh…”

“LEADER IS HOME!” “GUYS! KIIBO’S FINALLY HOME!”

“W-woah wait hold on calm down you guys!” Ouma lost his footing as he got tackled along with Kiibo. That’s how they ended up buried under a tangled mess of limbs and giggling young adults.

Kiibo laughed, “I’m home, everyone.”

Ouma eventually found himself laughing along with the sheer ridiculousness of the situation, “…Welcome home, Kiibo.”

Notes: Sorry for taking so long to fill this prompt. This needed a lot of brainstorming that I wasn’t ready for. akfjsd I hope you didn’t give up on me. I also hope that you’ll like this one, anon!

#katastrofic reply #ndrv3 #kiibouma #kiibo #ouma kokichi #katastrofic writing #this took too long akshfw

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mental-health-advice · 7 years

Note

i don't have anyone to talk so i thought i'd give this a go. i really don't know what's wrong with me. i have there terrible mood swings where i'll be fine but in a matter of ten minutes my emotions will be off the wall. during these spells i feel angered, frustrated and do nothing but cry. im not sure what triggers them but sometimes to calm down i'll pinch myself. im kinda worried pinching will turn into worse things since the pain feels almost like a release. this sounds crazy i'm sorry.

Hi beautiful,

I am sorry to hear that youhave been dealing with such intense mood swings recently. I want to start offby saying that nothing you had told us sounds crazy. Actually, a lot ofdifferent people have to go through the exact same feelings that you are currentlyhaving. The positive thing though, is that you have realised that something haschanged within you and that you may need help to learn how to deal with thesesudden behaviours.

I’ll come back with thepinching later and will start off with the mood swings first, since they seemto be the cause of the painful behaviour you’ve been inflicting to yourself.Mood swings can be caused by sooooooooomany different things. That means it will be hard for me to put my finger onexactly what has been causing yours. Of course, I am not a mental healthprofessional, which means I do not have to power to tell you why you’ve beenfeeling this way, but I will still list on the possible explanations for your intenseand frequent mood swings. Remember that self diagnosis is not a good idea andthat you should always seek help from a professional, who will be able to offeryou the proper help on how to get better.

They could be caused by depression : Have you been feeling moretired lately? Have you been feeling like the only thing you want to do issleep, unable to find the motivation to do the things that once made you sohappy? Have your emotions been all over the place, unable to concentrate onanything else but sadness and intense feelings of emptiness? Have you lost weightor felt like you’ve been getting sick? Have you felt like it was hard toconcentrate and hard to think straight? If the answers to these questions areyes, then the mood swings might be caused by depression.

They could also be caused by bipolar disorder : Have you been feeling like yourthoughts are all rushing through your mind at the same time without you beingable to control them? Have you been feeling like your moods are more irritableand elevated lately? Have you been feeling impulsive, doing different thingsand taking decisions that you would of have never made before? Have you beenfeeling sleep deprived, like sleep does not seem to matter anymore? Do you tendto not be able to have a stable conversation, changing quickly from one topicto another without them being related? If the answers to these questions areyes, the mood swings might be caused by bipolar disorder.

The next one might soundcompletely strange, but mood swings could also be caused by premenstrual syndrome if you are agirl. The most frequent behaviours you can feel when in pms are :oversensitivity, crying, anger and irritability, anxiety and exaggerated moodswings. If you are having premenstrual syndrome, this is what you should besensing in your body : feeling tired, feeling bloated, having weird cravings oran increase of your appetite and even insomnia. If you are feeling all this,your mood swings could be caused by premenstrual syndrome. Those feelingsshould happen for a few to several days before the one week of your menstrualcycle.

Now in more rare cases, moodswings could be caused by schizophrenia: Symptoms of psychotic behaviours are :Have you been having disorganised behaviour? Have you experienced any type ofhallucinations of hearing, such as having voices in your head? Have youexperienced any type of hallucinations of seeing, such as bugs crawling on yourskin? Have you experienced any type of hallucinations of taste, such as tastingthings that are not connected to reality? Symptomsof less psychotic behaviours are : Have you felt inhibition of facialexpression? Have you felt a lack in your care and self hygiene? Have you beenfeeling lack of motivation? Is your speech lacking or incoherent? If the answerto these questions are yes, your mood swings could be caused by schizophrenia.

Mood swings can also be causedby ADHD (Attention deficit hyperactivitydisorder) : Have you felt like your capacity to concentrate on a task is low?Have you felt like you are easily distracted or have short memory? Do you havetrouble staying seated for a long period of time? Do you always feel the needto talk? Do you easily feel bored? If the answer to these questions are yes,then the mood swings you have been feeling might be caused by ADHD.

It could also be, in more rarecases, dementia : Have you beenforgetting things easily? Do you have trouble doing certain tasks that you wereonce able to do with very little effort -likegetting dressed or going to the bathroom-? Is your ability to communicatedifficult? Have the people surrounding you seen a big change in your behaviourand are struggling to recognise you? If you are feeling those things and havesaid yes to those questions, your mood swings might be caused by dementia.

Now, I know all of that was alot of information to take in. As I said before, I am in no case aprofessional, which means I cannot diagnose you and as I said earlier, selfdiagnosis is never a good idea. Your mood swings could even be related to noneof the above, coming from a complete other source. That is why I highly suggesttalking to a professional about what you have been feeling lately.

Now, let’s talk about thepinching. I can understand that you might feel scared that the pinching mightturn into scarier things. In the end, any type of behaviour that is done toprocure you pain, is considered like self harm, even though no blood isinvolved. You should definitely talk to your therapist about that as well. I amvery proud of you though, for realising these behaviours quickly before themgetting worst. It shows how incredibly brave you are. There are a lot ofoptions that can make you feel better, other than pain. You could look at ourdistractions page to get more ideas. To avoid injuring yourself, I suggesttrying to keep yourself surrounded by people when you feel sad, to avoid beingalone. I would also suggest staying away from the emplacement where you usuallypinch yourself as much as possible. You can also grab a pen and whenever youfeel like pinching yourself, you can draw a little dot on the spot you were thinkingof hurting. That way, you can look at the crayon instead of the red mark itwould do on your skin. The crayon marks at the end of the day will show you theurges you were able to resist and will make you feel quite proud. Remember thatno matter what struggles you are going through right now, you are beautiful andwonderful. You do not deserve to get hurt. You can also have a look at ourAlternatives to Self-Harm page and to the Reasons not to self-harm page on our blog. Theycan be a massive help whenever you feel like pinching at your skin.

Remember that there isabsolutely no shame in getting help. You are beautiful and wonderful anddeserve all the happiness in the world. We love you and are always here for youwhenever you need to talk. You are not alone lovely.

Storms don’t last forever, your strength will fightthe clouds away and let the rainbow shine throughout the sky.

Sabrinaxx

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elsewhereuniversity · 7 years

Text

Darling

Crossposted to AO3

In the East Hall, the Gentry are called Takers-And-Givers. Marie had her best 2B pencil stolen only to find three packs of pencils - different hardnesses, sizes, colours - in her room that evening. Charley’s bottles of milk were stolen in the first week of term but now their whole flat gets weekly deliveries of dairy far better than any bought at the local shops. Sanjeet’s flowers were decimated a week before Valentines, but now they’re the best and brightest blooming flowers on campus.

First they Take and then, later, they Give, something of equal or more value. No one seems to know how or why, it just is, until the new kid arrives in halls - a late transfer, some incident at their last uni dogging her steps, giving her haunted eyes and probably-nightmares and arms clutched close around her chest whenever someone looms too close.

When people ask, she says to call her Ravenna. That that’s not her name, but her actual name isn’t one she trusts anymore, that it makes her feel unsafe in her own skin. So everyone in the Hall calls her Ravenna, or, sometimes, Blackbird if they know her well enough, and give her space.

She hates beyond hate to be touched.

–

Marie sees her one day, within touching distance of one of the Takers-and-Givers often seen around East Hall. They go by Darling - an odd moniker for a six foot creature with a greenish cast to their skin and a bird’s nest of hair, but no one would ever dare say anything to them. They stand just within arms-reach of Ravenna, watching down at the short girl with half-narrowed eyes.

“I don’t want to be afraid,” Ravenna is saying. “I'm sick of it. They say you can help with that, that you can take something away and give something in return. Can you take away my fear?”

Marie almost bolts down the hall to Ravenna, almost warns her against making a deal with the Takers-And-Givers, almost warns her against even mentioning the distance they are from normal but Darling only smiles gently, politely, not the predatory way they had when Marcus from Sumner’s Hall had tried to strike a bargain.

“No one can take your fear,” Darling says. “It’s yours. But if you give me a taste of it then I will give you protection when you are fearing.”

Marie starts backing down the hall, back towards her room, but she still sees Ravenna pause, nod, and go completely rigid as Darling bends their head to gently kiss her.

A wind blows down the hall, smelling of chickens and straw and Michaelmas daisies and Darling is vanished.

–

We need milk [Sent: 10 minutes ago | From: Maxie]

Please Charley, they’re puking everywhere [Sent: 5 minutes ago | From: Maxie]

CHARLEY. WAKE THE FUCK UP [Sent: 2 minutes ago | From: Maxie]

Charleeeeey. Please? I’ll pay for your coffee for the next week? [Sent: 30 seconds ago | From: Maxie]

Charley rolls out of bed and groans. Rubs their eyes with the heel of one hand and pulls on some trackie bottoms, a hoodie. Sticks their phone into their pocket, and their dorm card so they can get back into the halls.

Sumner’s Hall isn’t that far away but also: it’s cold out. They could text one of the others to let them back in, or make a libation of milk and see if Angrboda will use her tricks to get them back in the hall, but honestly, they can’t be fucked. The deal with Angrboda for free dairy is good, and they’re not about to add more clauses. Not after how much it had cost to pay Petey the Law Student for their help last time they’d made a change.

There’s crocs near the door, which they toe into and then pace down to the kitchen area to the fridge. Pull out a two-pint thing of milk, check their pockets again and sigh.

“Maxie,” they mutter. “You are paying for my coffee for a fortnight.”

–

When they get to Maxie’s floor in Sumner’s they see what the fuss is about. It’s a party, which is to be expected on a Friday night, and while Maxie is great at stocking up on bread, and they’d made a deal so their tapwater is the best and cleanest stuff on campus, Maxie never has enough milk.

Sometimes Charley thinks that was the price Maxie paid for the water.

The pukers are gathered in the kitchen, an array of bowls on the table, and all of them hunched over one. Maxie grins when they spot Charley, heedless of the flowers falling out of their tight curls.

“My friend,” they say. “You are the best. Stay awhile?”

Usually Charley wouldn’t but tonight, for some reason, they do. They help Maxie take care of the pukers for a few minutes, and then they go to circulate, catching up with Maxie’s flatmates.

It’s while they’re doing this they see Ravenna, her fall of dark hair and closed-in posture instantly recognisable and made worrying by the guy leaning over her, getting in her space.

Charley’s pushing through the crowd when the guy yells, turns, and Ravenna vanishes.

They cast their eyes around, searching desperately - Ravenna was one of theirs, an East Hall-er, and she was from their flat, and everyone could tell something had happened, that she had something bad in her past. Their whole flat had met a week after she’d arrived to quietly promise to make sure she was safe as far as they could manage.

They spot Ravenna in an alcove by the door. Her head’s tilted back against the wall and opposite her–

Is that Darling?

It is, six-foot Darling, built like a beanpole, green-tinted skin to match and they’re giving her space apart from a too-many-times-jointed hand on Ravenna’s wrist.

“Are you all right?” Darling is asking. “I wasn’t sure if I got here in time.”

Charley sees Ravenna draw a deep breath in and nod. As she leans forwards and Darling - slowly, very very slowly - wraps an arm around her shoulders, Charley meets Darling’s eyes.

Charley knows Darling is quite aware of the iron nails they keep in their bag. They’d burned Darling’s hand when they’d tried to Take some sugar sachets back in December.

Darling nods.

–

They all see it, in the flat. Whatever happened to Ravenna, all her nightmares, they still dog her steps, but Darling dogs those - dogs the memories, the nightmares, and provides protection whenever someone looms too close.

Darling even appears in the kitchen area one morning when Marie reaches too close to Ravenna to take a pencil - suddenly a shadow solidified into the dark-greenish skin of Darling, a shimmering reflection of light became Darling’s smile.

“Give her space,” they’d said, simply, and Marie retracted her arm.

Ravenna had smiled, reached back to Darling. “I know they won’t hurt me, Darling,” she’d said.

“Maybe,” Darling had said, taking Ravenna’s offered hand, “But I could taste your fear.”

Ravenna had smiled again, squeezed Darling’s hand.

Darling’s there in classes as well, at parties. In the library, in the cafe, even in the shops. When Sanjeet joins Ravenna to go to the gym he sees Darling solidify for a moment in a shadow by the door, unable to enter a place so full of iron.

Keep her safe, Darling mouths to Sanjeet, and he nods back.

She’s from their flat after all. One of theirs to keep safe.

–

“Mavourneen,” Darling whispers to Ravenna one day. They’re sat in Ravenna’s room, Ravenna in her chair, Darling giving her space and perched on the very edge of her bed. “That’s my name.”

Ravenna’s hands cup her elbows, and she’s all curled into herself on the chair. Less curled into herself than she had been at the beginning, before she’d approached them and made the deal, but Darling can still see how tension rests in her bones, how fear itches at the back of her neck.

There’s an unspoken promise in giving Ravenna their name, and they wonder if she quite understands it. She understood enough to ask for the deal, to make very clear what she was asking for and to only accept will give you protection, not can. But she kept no iron with her, no salt, not a single charm or medallion to confer protection.

“I don’t know if my old name is really mine anymore,” Ravenna says, and they know she’s understood. “It doesn’t feel right, not since-” she pauses, swallows. “Not since what happened.”

They offer a hand, palm up. Ravenna takes it, slowly, and for a moment there is fear before her thumb runs over their skin and she relaxes.

“What she did to you,” Darling says gently. “What she did was wrong.”

Ravenna smiles tentatively. “I think,” she says, “Ravenna is my real name, now. My true name.”

Darling smiles, showing far too many teeth. Their teeth are almost catlike, thin and almost translucent some of them.

“Mavourneen,” Ravenna says softly, sounding it out. “That’s a lovely name. Does it mean anything?”

Darling smiles wider, shows more teeth. “It means,” they say, “Darling.”

Ravenna’s delighted laugh is the sweetest thing they’ve heard in years.

[x]

#stories #essayofthoughts #this is so lovely #darling #ravenna #submission

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