#what can i do to convince more mutuals to consume both of these
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this is for me and @thespoonisvictory and the rambling you will all have to endure from me very soon
#what can i do to convince more mutuals to consume both of these#succession#the musketeers#faun.talks
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weakness
gojo satoru x reader
summary: you make the strongest sorcerer weak
w/c: .54k
tags/warnings: domestic fluff with a suggestive ending so 18+, gojo is irrevocably in love with you, the feeling is entirely mutual, gn!reader, no use of y/n
a/n: we truly do not deserve him
masterlist
check out my latest work for gojo here
there isn't a single sorcerer in all of japan unfamiliar with the name gojo satoru. he's known that since he was old enough to understand the innate techniques etched into his body.
and what a lonely existence it was. being the strongest leaves you with little else besides power.
perhaps that's why he finds himself so utterly consumed by you— the only thing in the world that makes him feel weak.
whenever your eyes find his own, his hands tremble. and whenever you give him that crooked grin, his knees nearly collapse beneath him.
he can't even begin to understand it. how someone like him could be lucky enough to belong to someone like you. he knows that a million lifetimes of effort would still leave him pathetically undeserving.
that's probably the reason he hesitates before entering your shared apartment each night. he wants nothing more than to come home to you, and yet, fear tugs in his heart at the prospect of it all having been some long, drawn out dream.
how else can he explain walking into the kitchen, finding you there covered in flour, looking impossibly beautiful? how else can he account for the way your face lights up upon seeing him?
"hey love," you greet him warmly and your voice feels like the answer to every prayer he's ever had.
his long, strong arms wrap you up in an instant, his face burrowing into your neck.
"hey," he breathes out, the heat fanning across your skin.
"'toru," you warn. "you're going to get flour all over your uniform!"
"s'okay, baby. i don't mind."
it's only when you move to hug him back that he fully relaxes against your body.
"how was your mission?"
he doesn't answer right away, reveling in your comforting embrace for a few seconds longer.
"it was alright," he offers, untangling himself from you and standing back up to his full height. "missed you."
"i missed you, too." you peer up at him, your eyes swimming with adoration. his heart clenches painfully at the sight. "but i made your favorite!"
you turn on the oven light, so he bends down for a glimpse at the pastry that's nearly finished baking.
his expression softens and he grabs your face in his hands, his thumb brushing over your cheekbone delicately. "how can i make you understand how much i adore you?"
despite the heat that creeps up your neck, you let out a breath of a laugh. "'toru it's only a pie."
he hums, "made just for me by my most favorite person in the world."
your lips curl into that lopsided grin he loves so much before you stand on your tiptoes to kiss him. he deepens it, his arms finding your waist and tugging your body towards his own possessively.
after a few moments, he pulls away just enough to plant a kiss to your nose, then your forehead, and finally both of your cheeks, savoring the way you giggle at his show of affection.
"okay, i think i'm starting to understand, but i might need just a little more convincing."
he gazes down at you with a smirk, the look in his eye suddenly mischievous. "yeah? maybe we can make another pie together, princess."
"..'toru!"
#m!writes#gojo#gojo x reader#gojo imagines#gojo fluff#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru imagines#gojo satoru fluff#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk imagines#jjk fluff
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I'm not exactly sure who you write for, but could you write angst about pedri? With a fluff ending? I don't see much pedri on here ...
Hi, thank you for requesting, I hope you like it 💗
You knew pedro for the longest time, when you met each other he was shorter than you.
Always having a ball with him, talking about his dreams.
For the longest time, you liked him .
You always did but you can't say the same about him, not how you like him.
you consider him your first love and first love isn't always sweet and delightful, not in your case.
You were there witnessing him being sweet and loving with another girl, multiple even.
You were there when his heart was broken, you were there when he was making the same mistake to go back to the one who broke his heart.
Just like you, you stayed besides thinking that it's okay to be just his friend, nothing more as long as you stay next to him.
However, you were wrong.
You can't handle it anymore, realizing you're just making yourself miserable.
Starting to distance yourself from him, not going to his game, texting him simple answers,not starting conversations with him, not joining your friends group hang out, doing everything possible to forget him.
You decided to focus more on yourself this time, everyone noticed this change even pedri.
He was confused, thought that it's something temporary and wouldn't last because he knew both of you are never away from each other for too long.
Yet this time it wasn't like always, nothing would make you change your mind, pedri would be in your past.
one of your friend tried to set you up on a date but you refused, you weren't going to jump on a relationship right away especially when you know you still hasn't forgot pedri.
sometimes you feel pathetic how much your one sided love effected you however you don't know how your absence effected pedri.
pedri kept asking all your mutual friends about you, they know why you stopped talking to him but won't tell him, his thoughts about you started to consume him every second of the day.
started to effect him even when he's playing, that's everyone in the club notices, " fix whatever that's preventing you from playing, i need my pedri that i know back in the pitch, i don't know who this one infornt of me" said to him xavi .
he putts his head down, never wanting to disappoint his team and fans, but this what happened today . he couldn't control or keep the ball when it gets to him. not because of the other team being strong no it was because he was thinking about you.
"you should just go and talk to her" gavi's voice cuts his thoughts, " i tried, she won't answer her phone or my texts" shaking his head and getting up from his seat to the door.
"so? go to her house" the younger one said again following pedri's .
"i can't just go, just like that without a warning" .
"yes you can, she's not answering your calls or your texts, i'm sure she won't open if she knew it's you" gavi says and hit his friends shoulder and leave him to be.
he's right, you won't open the door knowing it was him but he doesn't even know if you're going to be home.
yet, he is infront of your house, counting in his head to calm his nerve, he's here now, what would he say?
fuck it
he knocks and wait for a few sconed, heads down, drying his sweaty hands on his pants while waiting for the door to open.
you weren't waiting for anyone so the knocks on the door were surprising to you.
not so much, since you bestie has been coming a lot uninvited to your house. trying to convince you to start dating.
"i told you, i'm not going to th-" you stop your words when you notices this is not your friend but the one you never excepted to see Infront of you .
both of you are looking at each other quietly, you from the surprise, in your mind pedri's in the past.
"hi, you won't let me in?" said pedri with a soft smile on his face.
"what are you doing here?" not moving from the door.
"you're not answering any of my calls, or my message's" his hands going through his hair.
"it's not like it's the first time that i do that" .
"you do this to everyone this time it's just me, you're still there in all of our friends lives but me, that's a first" he's right this time it was just him.
"it's like you were never in my life, you disappeared, i don't remember the last time i saw you, did i do something? if i did then i'm sorry" he gets closer to the door making you take a step back.
"if you did nothing wrong why are apologizing?" turning your back to him, he take his chance and get's inside of the house following you to the living room.
'because i want my friend back, i don't want to lose you, y/n" you stop in your tracks, friend , that's all you will ever be to him.
"what if i don't want to be your friend anymore Pedro?" he looks at you surprised, you never call him pedro and you don't want to be his friend anymore, what happened so you get to this point.
"why? wh-" .
"i can't be just your friend anymore, i won't do that to myself" you cut him, you don't care anymore, you like him and him rejecting you would make it easier for you to get over him even though it'll hurts and maybe you'll cry for days.
"i, i , i didn't know that this is how you feel, why didn't you say anything before" .
"when? you always dating someone or interested in the another and i know you don't like me so how would i ever tell you".
"you don't know how i feel so don't assume" he get closer to you but you take a few steps back.
"don't say that, you don't mean that" you shake your head , you don't want him to give you false hope.
"but i do, i do mean it, you know how hard those days has been for me?" trying again to get closer to you.
"stop, stop pedri you're being mean now" you don't believe him, you don't believe, you were there when he got his heart broken over and over, it won't make any sense now if he says that he likes you too.
"how i'm being mean? i do like you" trying to hold you, you are too weak now to try and fight.
"as a friend, that what i am to you" pedri knew that it'll take a while for you to believe him, maybe he didn't realize his feelings too until lately but it doesn't mean his feeling isn't as real.
"no you're not, you don't know how much i missed you, all i did is thinking of you, is she ok? why she won't talk to me? looking were you always sit in the games and feeling like crying when i see it empty, i'm sorry i didn't realize my feelings before, but i like you more than friend and want you to be my girl, you've always been my person and i won't live in a world where you are not"
he's holding your face, both of your foreheads touching, that's right both of you has always been each other persons, no matter how many are gone, you always stick together .
"it'll take me while to believe that" .
"i know, i have all the time in the world to prove myself" his eyes going back and forth between your lips and eyes.
standing holding each other, you don't know who started the kiss but who would've thought that's how your night would end, a kiss and a date set for tomorrow night.
it took me while, i didn't know how to start it and end it , hope it's okay
#pedri gonzalez#pedri imagine#pedri x reader#pedri blurb#football imagines#football fanfic#football world cup#football x reader#football imagine#pedro gonzalez#pedro x reader
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Can you do Kayn with a cute adorable s/o? I'm a huge sucker for dynamics where the cinnamon roll dates death personified 🥺😩
Synopsis :
Kayn with an overly cute s/o
Type :
Headcanon
Warning :
None, kayn have a ray of sunshine and isn't scared to use it
A/N :
Coming back again after a pause, the league fandom seems dead (like in game enjoyer, not only arcane) and it made me kinda sad but as long as I can contribute I'll be happy
~~~~~~~~~~
First things first kayn HATED how you seemed to be hapoy about everything
I hardly see kayn falling for someone out the the shadow order since he is mostly busy with master zed's mission, being an acolyte and his own goal to conquer rhaast power
So you're most likely a member and we'll stick to it
Unlike most people in the order you were bubbly and full of joy, most of them were orphans who lost theur family because of war, they had to grown up too fast and that's why most of them don't show much emotions
And if they do, they're mostly negative because they don't know how to deal with them
Your adorable personnality and bright smile make people drawn to you like a bug to a light
Since in their life you're most likely to be the brightest thing
But of course not all acolyte saw you as someone who can deal with shadow magic
Kayn was one of them, he fought that your persobbality didn't matched what was required to master shadows, and that in the end you'll be killed by these
But he was wrong
You were cute and adorable but not naive, you were mentally strong, event stronger than some of zedns student since most of them live while knowing only hatred and anger
One time kayn and you were both sent to a mission outside of Ionia, that's when kayn saw what you were really made of, and started to respect you a lot more
Things progressed slowly from there, from mutual respect to friends, and after kayn kept quiet about his crush for you for almost a year he finally confessed
You happily returned his feeling telling him that because of his always grumpy face you never dared to tell him what you felt
Your dynamic as a couple is definitely "someone will die" "of fun!"
Even rhaast sight when he start to hear you babbling happily about whatever when kayn is just there and nodding along
You hugged kayn by surprise once and he made a squealing noise out of shock you're not ready to forget, so surprise hugs became a routine
They aren't surprising anymore but kayn love to indulge and pretend you surprised him
He has the biggest poker face while you hug his arm with a bright smile, he can give you a headpat, but that's the only thing he'll do in public to show you affection
In private however he is much more attentive, not romantic, lovey dover or cute himself, but he touch you more, hug you more, kiss you more, becuse it's the two of you
When you go on separate mission he always kiss you on the forehead, a simple gesture to tell you that you'll be reunited
Master zed approve deeply of your relationship, he think that someone lile you has a good influence on kayn
He is less stressed, less angry, and less likely to be consumed by the darkin
Sometime grab kayn's cheek and use them to make him have a weird face, he never complained about it because in the end he always receive a kiss
Sometime he want to make you happy and indulge you in a piggy back ride
And you convinced him to bring you back to the order like this, he thought that since it was night everyone would be asleep
They were not, and teased kayn for a month straight about it
He never gave you piggy back ride after that
You two lay be opposite but kayn can't say how much he is lucky to have you
Sometime he may just contemplate life and ask himself how he managed to get someone as good as you
He'll never have his answer but he is already glad for what he has
~hope you'll like it~
🌸Request are open🌸
#writing#request#league#league of legends#X reader#Kayn#Shieda#Shieda kayn#League x reader#League of legends x reader#Kayn x reader#Shieda kayn x reader#Kayn league of legends#Kayn league#Imagine#Headcanon#Kayn headcanon#Kayn imagine#League headcanon#League imagine#League of legends headcanon#League of legends imagine#league of legends x gender neutral reader#gender neutral reader#gender neutral#League x gender neutral reader#Kayn x gender neutral
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so it goes... | vernon chwe
Your honeymoon turns into an impromptu road trip after running off with your best friend the day of your wedding. Your feelings have certainly changed since the surprise turn of events, but you worry that Vernon's have too and formulate a plan to get some answers.
🌑 Pairing: bestfriend!vernon (getawaycar!vernon) x runawaybride!reader
🌑 Word Count: 5.4k
🌑 Rating: 18+
🌑 Genre: Best friends to lovers, smut, fluff, minor angst
🌑 Warnings: It's angsty at the beginning 🥹, Y/N is feeling insecure about their relationship with Vernon, mention of suggestive content, explicit language, Y/N starts plotting 👀, wet™️ Vernon needs his own warning, explicit sexual content, making out, marking/biting/scratching, angst makes a brief return, Vernon has a major Y/N sensitivity kink 🤩, groping, things go 0-100 real mf quick, hair pulling, dirty talk, rough fingering, multiple orgasms (f receiving), praise, strength kink makes multiple appearances, brief oral (f receiving), mention of face riding and oral (m receiving), unprotected sex (pls be safe), rough sex, wall sex, soft fluffy moments sprinkled throughout
A/N: Decided to do a follow up to getaway car because I just really fell in love when I was writing that couple and wanted to explore their story some more. This can still be read as a standalone though without reading getaway car first. I hope you enjoy if you decide to give it a read and thank you again for all the love and support on my fics 💙
Masterlist
You were going to kill Vernon. Well, maybe.
Your honeymoon turned runaway impromptu road trip with your best friend was nearly over. Soon enough, the two of you would be going back to reality, and back to face the consequences of running away from your own wedding. And running off with your best friend who’d secretly been in love with you for years.
These past few weeks with Vernon had been great, really. Driving endlessly with no real destination in mind, spending each night in a different town. Just like you’d always talked about back when you were teenagers. Two partners in crime and their getaway car.
It had all been so perfect. Except, you were starting to be convinced that maybe Vernon wasn’t quite as into you as you had both thought prior to your wedding escape.
To be fair, you were still coming into your own feelings. But you could feel them growing stronger with each passing day that you spent with him. You knew you wanted him, wanted this. And you’d thought Vernon had felt the same. Especially since his feelings had had a much longer history than yours did.
Which was why you’d felt so puzzled by the fact that during your time together, the two of you hadn’t gone any further than heavy making out and curious, but tentative, touches.
Vernon had always sparked a warmth inside you. He just made you feel safe and comfortable. At home. But when his lips were on you, his hands roaming your body, the only thing you felt was heat. Hot and blinding and all consuming.
Initially, you’d understood the mutual hesitation to rush into anything too much too soon. But now that you’d spent all this time together, and your feelings were more than mutual, giving into that desire, that craving, just felt natural. It felt right.
Vernon must have felt differently though because he always initiated the deescalating of every physical encounter that you’d had over the last couple of weeks. You’d be lying if you said it hadn’t made you absolutely melt inside every time that he had opted instead to just hold you in his arms. You’d found that you just loved being close to him.
But there was also a part of you that was absolutely burning for him. So bad you almost couldn’t stand it. You wanted him. Wanted to know him inside and out. Learn his sounds of pleasure. His expressions of ecstasy. You wanted to be on your knees for him. Ready, willing, and at his mercy.
Part of you was terrified that maybe now that he’d had what he’d wanted all those years, you hadn’t lived up to expectations and he’d changed his mind about you. Maybe he just didn’t want you the same way you wanted him. Not anymore…
Your heart sank slightly as you stared down at your open suitcase. Your mind had drifted while you’d been packing. Vernon had gone out to make sure his car was ready to drive back home tomorrow. Leaving you alone in the hotel room with your racing thoughts and a bag of half worn clothes.
You laughed drily as your hand smoothed over all the lingerie gifted to you at your bridal shower. With how fast everything had happened the day of the wedding, you really hadn’t had time to repack before Vernon swung you by your place to grab your bag on the way out of town.
You recalled seeing his cheeks flush briefly when one of the garments had slipped out onto the floor in front of him. You still hadn’t been able to figure out if the reaction was because of the lingerie itself or because it was your lingerie. It wasn’t like he had given you any kind of indication that he would want to see you in it.
He’d seemed so confident and sure when he’d grabbed you and kissed you the day of your wedding. For fucks sake, the two of you had literally fallen out through the window and onto the grass with how desperate you’d been to get closer to each other. You could still picture his cute, little, surprised face poking out from underneath all the layers of your massive wedding dress. Even then, seeing him underneath you had made you feel some type of way.
Your mind was exhausted. It felt like you had been going round and round about this for hours at this point. It was your last night together, and you really didn’t want it to be ruined by the fears and overthinking plaguing you. You stopped to think for a moment. Really think.
Vernon had gotten extremely flustered right before the first time he’d kissed you, and even a few more times since then. He had always had somewhat shy tendencies ever since you were kids. Maybe he was lacking the confidence to initiate taking things any further. Maybe the initiating would have to be up to you…
You lifted up one of the black lacy garments that was still clutched in your hand, an idea quickly forming inside your head. After all, you still had one more night.
You were sitting on the edge of the bed, leg bouncing anxiously as you waited for the sound of Vernon turning the handle to signal his return. You were so worked up with nerves, that when the door did finally open, you jumped and your phone slipped from your hands and went clattering to the floor.
“Shit, sorry!” Vernon exclaimed as he made his way farther into the room, “Did I scare you?”
“S-Sorry. I think I was just a little spaced out.” you quickly replied before reaching down to retrieve your phone.
Vernon took a seat beside you on the bed, his knee lightly brushing against your own. You saw the worry swimming in his big, brown eyes when he turned to look at you, “Hey, did something happen?”
You shook your head, trying to make an effort to calm yourself. You felt Vernon’s hand on your cheek a moment later, gently cradling the side of your face.
“I’ve known you pretty much my whole life, and I know when something’s wrong. What’s the matter?” he pressed softly, thumb stroking across your skin.
“Nothing, it’s just…” you trailed off, your words escaping you.
Vernon’s eyes searched your face, a small frown pulling at his lips.
“Just what?”
Your next words came out in a rush, catching him off guard.
“Can we get dressed up and go out to dinner tonight?”
The cutest puzzled expression took over Vernon’s features, and he let out a nervous laugh.
“That’s what had you so worked up? Asking me if we can go to dinner?”
You smiled sheepishly, “Can we? Since it’s our last night together like this.”
Vernon closed the space between you to press a kiss to your forehead, and your skin warmed under his mouth.
“Sure. I would love to take you out to dinner, on a proper date.”
You felt the stupidest grin take over your face at his words.
“That sounds perfect. Why don’t you shower and get ready, and I’ll get dressed, and then we can go?” you suggested before pecking his lips.
It happened so fast that you were convinced you might have just imagined it. But for a split second you had felt Vernon’s hand on the back of your neck, snaking into your hair and trying to pull you closer. He retreated just as quickly though, leaving you feeling extremely confused yet again. You tried your best to shake it off as you watched him grab some clothes and disappear into the bathroom. Besides, you still needed to get ready yourself.
You had just finished tying your black, silk robe around yourself, seated at the foot of the bed with your legs crossed over each other, when Vernon emerged from his shower. Your mind immediately emptied itself at the sight of him standing there, wavy, chestnut locks dripping onto the floor below as he fumbled with the buttons of his black dress shirt. You could literally make out the water droplets scattered across his broad chest.
You were about to start drooling, and you honestly didn’t even care if he ended up catching you gawking at him. It was taking everything in you not to rush him from your spot across the room. When he finally turned to look at you, his hands froze over one of his buttons, and his eyes went wider than you had ever seen them. You giggled, satisfied that you had managed to surprise him, “You okay, Nonie?”
“I, uh, is that, um, is that what you’re wearing to dinner?” he stuttered out, a light blush already starting to creep up his cheeks.
“Actually,” you said, rising to your feet and making a show of undoing the tie holding your robe closed, “I think I’d rather eat in tonight.”
You let the material drop off your shoulders and to the floor, leaving you in the lacy, black lingerie set you had on underneath. You heard a strangled sound escape Vernon, his mouth opening and closing several times, but no words ever actually coming out. The man was literally speechless, and you felt a surge of confidence shoot through you.
You sauntered over to him, his eyes never leaving your figure as they hungrily drank you in. He inhaled sharply when your arms wound around the back of his neck, nails just slightly scratching against his skin. His own hands settled tentatively on your hips, and you could feel the way he was shaking.
You pushed up on your toes to press your lips to his jaw, nipping along his skin as you did so.
“Fuck.” Vernon shuddered out, his fingers just barely starting to dig into your skin.
You smirked against him before increasing the pressure of your mouth, determined to leave more than a few marks. Vernon’s hands spasmed at your sides, and you felt the vibration of his groan as it left his throat, “I swear, you are going to be the death of me.”
You just smiled again, hands leaving his neck to instead begin undoing his shirt.
“I want you, Vernon.” you whispered as your palms smoothed over his bare skin, and he shivered under your touch.
You clutched the sides of his open shirt, finally looking up to meet his eyes. His breathing was still coming out shaky, and there were so many emotions swirling in his dark irises.
"Will you have me?" you asked him, voice soft as you pressed yourself closer to him.
"Y/N, wait, I, we, I don't want you to feel like this is something you have to do for me."
He sounded sad, and your hands were immediately dropping from his shirt as you took a step back from him. You casted your gaze to the floor, shoulders drooping slightly, "Do you… Do you not want me like that?"
"Whoa, hey." Vernon voiced in concern, his hands reaching out and carefully settling on your arms, "What are you talking about?"
"It's just… Every time things start to escalate between us, you pull back. I thought maybe now that you finally had what you thought you wanted that…it wasn't as good as what you'd hoped for. I wasn't as good as what you'd hoped for." you informed him, your voice on the verge of breaking.
"Y/N, look at me, please."
You slowly lifted your head, and all you could think about was how pathetic you must've looked in that moment. His hands slid down your arms, intertwining his fingers with your own.
"I want you to listen to me, okay? You're not what I hoped for. You're better. So much better. I feel like I've been living in a dream these last few weeks. And the reason I haven't let things go any further is because… God, this is embarrassing to say out loud. Because it's you. Because I've wanted this and wanted you for so long, and I'm scared that if I give in to what I want… You just, you have no idea the hold you have on me. The power you have over me. It would be way too easy for me to lose control with you. Please believe me, I've been holding myself back this entire time because I would never, ever, want to put any pressure on you, or make you feel like you were obligated to do something just because of my feelings. But it has nothing to me with me not wanting you, and I need you to know that."
Your eyes threatened to fill with tears as you let his words sink in. This man really loved you. You saw it in his eyes and heard it in his voice. He loved you.
You caught him by surprise for the second time that night. You threw yourself forward and passionately crashed your lips against his own, swallowing the startled sound that tried to leave him. You pulled back just enough to be able to speak, "I want you to listen to me now, okay?"
Vernon just stared back at you, face burning bright red, and nodded.
"I need you to know, you're not the only one with feelings anymore. These past few weeks with you have been so beyond amazing. I've loved every minute we've spent together. And this, us, it's just felt so natural and comfortable. Like this is how it was always supposed to be. Vernon, you have to understand. You're in my head. My heart. You're under my skin. And the way I feel when you touch me, and kiss me…it's unlike anything I've ever felt before."
Vernon groaned, his head tipping back, and you giggled softly.
"Fuck, you are not making this easy right now."
"So stop holding back."
The words sounded so simple leaving your mouth.
Vernon swallowed, and you could see the conflicting emotions warring across his face.
"I'll lose myself in you. I know I will." he said quietly.
"So, then, let's get lost together. I trust you, Vernon. More than anyone. Do you trust me?" you asked gently, squeezing his hands that were still clasped in your own.
"Always." he answered without missing a beat.
You took one of his hands and guided it to lay over your pounding heart.
"You have power over me too, you know."
You led his hand further down your body, and Vernon's breath hitched.
"Feel what you do to me."
You helped slide his hand between your legs, right over your dripping core.
"Fucking shit." he hissed, and you pressed his hand harder against you.
"You said I have power over you." you started, pushing up to graze your teeth against his ear, "Show me."
You heard Vernon growl, and then you were being yanked back by your hair, a gasp escaping you right before his lips descended on your own. He kissed you with a furious hunger, his tongue diving in immediately, eager to taste you.
Your mouth moved against his just as fiercely, only faltering when you felt him starting to rub you over the lace. You sighed out at the stimulation, but it quickly turned to a full on moan as Vernon's lips trailed down your jaw. He used his grip on your hair to jerk your head to the side to give him better access to your neck.
He started to walk you backwards as his mouth seared across your throat, biting and sucking until you were letting out a whimper, "Fuck, Vernon."
His tongue soothed what must've been a freshly blooming mark, and you shivered as your feet continued to carry you across the room. Vernon busied himself adding more color to your neck, and your small, breathy pants filled the room.
Your back finally met the wall, causing Vernon to pull back momentarily. His eyes darkened as they raked over your swollen lips and marked up skin. Well, he had warned you.
His hand retreated from between your legs, his thumb swiping over your tender neck a moment later, making you wince slightly in sensitivity.
"I can't believe you ever thought I wouldn't want you. Angel, you're all I've ever wanted. You're all I think about all the time." Vernon rasped out, and a fresh wave of heat washed over you.
"When I go to sleep. When I wake up. It's always you." he went on, his body pressing further in on you.
His hot breath hit your ear, and you let out a sharp gasp when you suddenly felt him, fully hard, brush against your covered core, "When my hand is wrapped around my cock, you're the only thing on my mind. Your name is the only one I'm crying out. It's all you. Always."
"Please, Vernon," you begged breathlessly, "I wanna get lost with you."
"Anything for you, angel." he murmured, pressing a gentle kiss just below your ear.
He drew back, eyes watching your face intently. His hand left your neck, and he placed it above your head, caging you in between him and the wall. You were trembling with anticipation and need, awaiting whatever came next.
His other hand dropped from your hair and slowly began trailing down your body. He stopped to cup one of your breasts in his large hand, and your body squirmed beneath him in response. His thumb swiped over your covered nipple, and a whine slipped from between your lips.
Vernon's hand traveled lower and lower, until he was once again cupping you over the lace.
"I've thought about this so many times, you know. Thought about what you would look like." he breathed, his eyes growing hazier.
His fingers dipped under the material to meet your folds, and a moan escaped you.
"What kind of sounds you would make." Vernon continued, lust clouding his voice and his features.
At this rate, you were going to come undone before he had really even done anything. Vernon hummed thoughtfully, "Looks like I finally get to find out."
Without any further hesitation, two of his long digits pushed past your walls, and you cried out.
"Fuck, angel, so tight." he hissed as he drew his fingers back out.
Vernon was biting his lip in focus as he watched his fingers disappear inside you again and again. Something about being trapped and literally just having to take everything he was giving you made all of it feel that much more heightened, and had you hurtling towards your release that much faster. Your hands scratched against the wall, trying to find purchase, when a third digit plunged inside you, curling and twisting in all the right ways.
Vernon's thumb passed over your clit, just once, and your nails dug in harder.
"Feel good, angel?" he queried, chuckling slightly.
All you could do was nod your head as you continued writhing against the wall.
"Are you gonna be a good girl and come for me?"
You clenched hard around his fingers, and Vernon swore under his breath.
"Vernon...so close…please." you panted out, and then his thumb was attending to your clit as he continued harshly fucking you with his fingers.
The only thing still keeping you standing upright at that point was his body pressing against you, pushing you harder against the wall. You felt his free hand in your hair again, tugging tightly at the strands to keep your head in place and keep you looking at him.
"Keep your eyes on me, angel. Wanna see your pretty face when you fall apart for me." Vernon voiced, his gaze piercing.
"Vernon." you moaned softly, your legs beginning to shake.
"I've got you, angel. You can let go." he coaxed gently as his fingers continuously stroked that spot inside of you.
Every part of you became impossibly tight, and then your release was coating his digits and your thighs as you gave a sudden, sharp cry. Vernon helped you ride it out, his fingers still moving slowly inside of you. You were in a daze when he finally withdrew them and just let them rest against your thigh.
"You know, all the times I thought about this, fantasizing, dreaming. They didn't come anywhere close to how unbelievably hot the real thing was."
You giggled tiredly, "Really?"
Vernon leaned forward to kiss your nose, your face scrunching up in response.
"Yes, really. That was honestly incredible. You were incredible.”
You flushed at his praise, and his hand released your hair to cup your cheek instead.
“You were incredible too. I don’t think anyone has ever made me come that fast before.” you admitted, your face burning as the words left your mouth.
“Fuck, please, angel. I’m literally holding onto my last shred of self control here.” Vernon groaned, his fingers digging in and gripping your thigh.
“No more holding back on me, okay? I want it, and I can handle it.” you said firmly, and since he was still pressed against you, you felt the way his cock twitched, even through his dress pants.
“God, I hope this set wasn’t your favorite.” he remarked, and you gave a confused laugh.
“What?”
Vernon just gave you a knowing look before lowering himself on his knees in front of you. Oh fuck. You were trying to figure out how you were going to keep yourself from sliding down the wall, when he dragged his tongue along the inside of one of your thighs, cleaning your release and making you squeal. He did the same to the other side, and your skin seared underneath his tongue.
The sensation was so distracting that you barely registered his hands gripping either side of the lace still covering you. Not until you screamed in surprise when he ripped the material with what seemed like way too minimal effort. The image of his muscles flexing beneath his shirt and the sexy look of sheer concentration on his face would definitely be imprinted on your brain for quite some time. Maybe for forever even…
“Need to taste you, angel.” Vernon murmured, giving you no time to prepare before his tongue was dipping between your folds.
“Fuck, Vernon.”
He licked a stripe from your entrance to your clit, and one of your hands shot into his hair as you slumped back against the wall.
“Fuck, you taste even sweeter than anything I ever imagined.” he mused, and you nearly crumpled at the wild look in his eyes and seeing yourself shining all over his pretty lips.
The man already looked drunk off your core, and you didn’t think you could make it through him eating you out without passing out or passing away honestly. Plus, there was something you wanted even more right now.
“Vernon.” you tried, your voice still somewhat shaky.
He paused, letting his mouth hover over your center, “What is it, angel? Oh God, do you not like being gone down on? I guess I just assumed-”
“No, no.” you cut him off, shaking your head and giving him a reassuring smile, “That’s not it at all. Trust me, it’s actually one of my favorite things. Like ever. And the thought of you doing it to me is making me die inside right now. But, there’s just something that I want even more.”
Vernon quirked a curious eyebrow at you, making you laugh.
“Can you just come back up here, please? Before I get too distracted by your mouth.” you pressed, making Vernon chuckle this time before he got back to his feet.
“Okay, okay. But tomorrow morning before we leave, you and I have breakfast plans that include you riding my face.” he insisted, licking you from his lips, and your knees threatened to buckle.
“Only if those breakfast plans include me sucking you off.” you retorted boldly, and Vernon’s eyes practically blew out.
“I’m about to tear what’s left of this thing to shreds.” he growled as his finger slipped under one of the straps of your lingerie.
“Vernon. If you don’t fuck me right now, I am actually going to lose it. You’re not the only one struggling with self control.”
He made some sort of choking sound and you saw his dick jerk in his pants once again.
“Fucking hell, angel. Are you sure? I don’t wanna do too much too soon and end up hurting you.” he said back, voice laced with concern.
You gripped his shirt once more and made him meet your eyes, “Vernon Chwe. I want you to fuck me like we’re on our honeymoon. Until the only thing I can remember is your name and the way you feel inside of me.”
You could almost see that last bit of self control slipping away. You knew it was gone completely, when, as promised, Vernon took hold of the lace still covering your top half and ripped it right down the middle. You were quickly reaching out to push his own shirt off his shoulders and onto the floor below. You only had like a few seconds to marvel at his gorgeous physique before the top of his head was filling your vision as his warm mouth wrapped around one of your exposed nipples.
You moaned freely, hands tangling in his damp hair and pulling at the strands. One of his hands harshly groped your neglected breast, kneading the flesh while his tongue flicked over your perked bud.
“Oh my God, Vernon.” you whined, and he pulled your nipple between his teeth, making your vision go white for a moment.
His mouth was determined and hungry as he trailed his way to your other breast, and you had no doubt your chest would be just as marked up as your neck was. Your nails scratched against his scalp, making Vernon moan against you. He pulled off your other nipple with a pop, a visible string of spit trailing from your bud to his mouth.
His hands went to begin undoing his pants, and you felt your mouth begin to water slightly. He made quick work of sliding down his pants and boxers in one go, his hard cock springing back up against his stomach. You suddenly understood what he had meant about doing too much too soon and accidentally hurting you because he was fucking huge.
"Holy shit, Vernon." you said in awe, and his cheeks went red in response.
"Last time I'll ask, I promise. Are you sure, angel?" he questioned once more as his eyes searched your face for any sign of hesitation.
He wasn't going to find any though because you were sure about what you wanted. And you wanted him.
"I'm positive."
“Okay, then.” he voiced, hands settling on your hips, “Jump.”
You hesitated for a split second, mostly out of fear that you would make him drop you, but then you remembered this was the person you trusted more than anyone else. Your legs left the ground, and Vernon was waiting to catch you and wrap them around his waist. He held you up with surprising ease, and you couldn’t believe you had never noticed until now just how strong he was.
He carefully positioned himself, eyes never leaving yours. He pushed you back up against the wall as he started to slowly inch inside of you. You swore at the stretch, and an apology flashed across his features as he buried himself further. You clawed at his shoulders, tears springing to your eyes as he finally bottomed out.
"Angel, you're crying." Vernon spoke up, and you could see the panic starting to flood his eyes.
You leaned down to kiss him in reassurance, "Keep going. I'm okay, baby, I promise."
You felt him twitch inside you when you let the pet name slip. It had just come out so naturally. Vernon pulled out before pushing back in, a little faster this time, and your body moved up the wall slightly. It took a few more thrusts for you to adjust to him, but then all you could feel was pleasure as it burned through you.
“Taking me so well, angel. Shit, you’re so fucking perfect. You feel like heaven around me.” Vernon praised as he quite literally fucked you into the wall.
His hands were gripping underneath your thighs so hard that you weren’t going to be surprised if you were still able to see his finger imprints on your skin in the morning. You held onto him for dear life, cradling his head against your chest and burying your fingers in his messy locks.
“Vernon, fuck.” you groaned at a particularly harsh thrust, “Feel so good, baby.”
A mix of grunts and pants filled the air as he repeatedly speared you on his cock. It felt like the two of you were going to send the entire wall crashing down from your movements. The only words currently accessible in your vocabulary were his name and various curse words.
Vernon drew back to look at you, a soft moan escaping him.
“Fucking hell, angel. You look so gorgeous, all fucked out like this.”
He was a sight to behold himself. His wavy strands were once again soaked, from sweat this time, and they kept trying to fall over his eyes with each rock of his hips into yours. The muscles in his neck were visibly strained from the exertion of fucking you. His eyes kept fluttering every so often, and you found yourself taking a moment to admire just how long and beautiful his eyelashes were. Everything about him was honestly so beautiful, and you silently cursed yourself for taking so long to see it.
Vernon slowed down his thrusts briefly so that he could grab the back of your head and pull you down to connect your mouths. Your hands scrambled for purchase on his back as the two of you made out messily. At this pace, you were able to feel all of him as he hit so deep inside you that it was starting to make you see stars. You moaned into the kiss, your body beginning to tremble in his hold.
“You feel too fucking good, angel. Gonna be the death of me.” Vernon said in between the two of you lazily chasing each other’s lips.
“Vernon…close, baby.” you sighed out, clenching tight around him.
His next stroke had you feeling like he was reaching the deepest part of you, and you raked your nails down his back as your eyes rolled back. Vernon growled against your mouth, switching his pace so that he was once again pounding you into the wall. He really hadn’t been joking about losing control with you. The man was a total beast, and the way he was fucking you felt absolutely wild. Primal. And you were so fucked out of your mind, that all you could do was take it and babble incoherently.
You felt one of his hands slide around from under your thigh, and dip instead between your legs to rub your neglected clit. You screamed, that last bit of stimulation all you needed to push yourself over the edge. You sobbed into Vernon’s mouth, and he hissed as you came all over his cock.
“Angel, fuck. Such a good girl, soaking my cock. Gonna fill you up so fucking good, I’m almost there.” he grunted out, his thrusts noticeably losing their rhythm.
It was all you could do not to just go slack in his hold as he desperately chased his own high. Vernon chanted your name over and over again, kissing any part of you he could reach. He let out a broken moan, twitching inside of you before you felt stripes of cum painting your walls.
Everything felt so hazy as he carefully set your feet back on the ground before slowly pulling out, making you wince in sensitivity.
“Still glad I didn’t hold back?” he asked teasingly, smoothing some of the hair back from your face.
You gave a tired laugh, “You know, I may not be tomorrow when I can’t walk. But for tonight, it was so fucking worth it.”
Vernon kissed you sweetly, smiling against your lips. Your chest swam with warmth. All the pieces had really just fallen into place for the two of you. Getting caught up in a moment had never felt so good.
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Chapter 6
Closer at Last
The ceremony was beautiful; Shuri will make an excellent Queen. She holds herself as equal to her people and does a great job of respecting tradition but still has a scientific mind. Her brother would be incredibly proud.
I approach the royal table and bow, "Queen Shuri"
She covers her eyes in embarrassment "Hey you stop that, please just call me Shuri, nothing changes except my title."
"Everything changed, you are one of the most powerful people on Earth. Accept that title, you earned it. Now, will the queen hug her friend?" She reaches in and we embrace each other," I am so proud of you, everyone is."
"Thank you, Millie"
We eventually break the hug and I look towards former Queen Romanda and bow, " Queen Mother I was wondering if you could lend me your knowledge on a personal matter.
"Of course child, what can I do for you?"
"Do you have any info on a woman named Ororo or the "walker of clouds"? I think she was a witch who could control the weather."
"Ahh the Windrider." she looks at me curiously "Why do you want to know about a former Queen of Wakanda"?
Queen?
Too stunned to speak I just stand there in confusion until Shuri speaks up, "Millie?"
"I'm sorry. I'm just a little shocked." I hold my hand out, "Permission to bring you both up to speed rather quickly?" I ask.
They nod and both touch my hand. I call it 'memory transference'; It only activates by physical touch. With this ability, I can share my memories directly without having to waste time explaining. They see everything from my beach dream, the voices, my initial encounter with Namor, and the small info about my possible mother.
"So that's how you know about our mutual fish friend," Shuri says,
The Vibe:
Stepping on Glass
Queen Romanda looks at me stunned, "Ororo may be your mother? How can that be she disappeared more than 300 years ago."
"I'm older than I look, your majesty. Is there anything you can tell me about her? Anything. I've been searching for answers to my past for nearly 10 years now." I sigh," I have lost my way and I don't know who I am."
Romanda begins to speak, "Ororo daughter of N'dare, was the former Queen of Wakanda back in the 1600s. She hailed from a tribe of witches and priestesses who possessed knowledge of magic rituals. She is the ancestor of the Rain Queen and former Sorcerer Supreme, Ayesha of Balobedu. Ororo and her husband ruled peacefully until he, a former black panther, unfortunately, was lost in battle. Just as the legend says, she wept for days due to a broken heart and caused terrible storms for a week. Consumed in grief she started searching for ways to bring her love back," She pauses, " Unnatural ways that led her to the Darkhold"
What the fuck...
"She eventually disappeared without a trace."
Shuri speaks up, "She must have been pregnant with you, it's probably why she took it so hard."
"My sweet child," Romanda grabs my hand," If this is true, you belong here with us. Queen Ororo in some way has returned to us, the elders will be pleased."
"I need a shot.... or 5." I nervously laughed, "Thank you for your insight I appreciate it."
"Tomorrow please feel free to peruse the royal library. I may be mistaken but there may be some personal books and diaries there."
"Thank you so much, I am forever in your debt" I bow
Shuri speaks up, "We are about to rap up the ceremony. You and Peter go change into something comfortable and meet the rest of us for a small gathering on the beach. Fair warning Bucky will be there but, alcohol will also be there"
"... I don't know, I'm pretty tired now that I'm thinking about it."
"Nonsense, I am only crowned Queen once, come celebrate with me. I miss us dancing together!" She leans forward and giggles," I invited Namor too. Not that I particularly want him there but as Queen, I've got to keep the peace. Took some convincing, but he agreed to come. You know why?" she teases.
"Why?" I ask
"I said you'd be there. You know he's been staring at you all night." she says
"Oh god stop it, you didn't"
"I absolutely did. Come onnnn, hang out with us, flirt. It may make you feel better about Bucky being here. Besides you are officially Wakandan now, do your part in keeping international peace."
I burst out in laughter, "By flirting with the hot mysterious fish man?"
"So you do think he's hot" she exclaims
"Forgive my daughter, she is still so young." Romanda laughs
"Please? For me" she begs
I take a long sigh, "Fine. But this is the last time you whore me out."
"Yes! Meet us there in 30. Wear something cute"
"Yea yea yea." I bow to them both and walk away looking for Peter.
--------------
Peter and I quickly changed and head to the beach. He's wearing a pair of shorts and a cheesy red Hawaiian shirt that he stole from Happy from forever ago. I'm wearing a yellow 2-piece swimsuit with a long white, almost sheer, beach dress over it. We both opted for no shoes since we will be walking in sand.
"So, who all is going to be here?" Peter asks
"Me, you, Shuri obliviously, Nakia, Riri, Okoye, Anika, Ayo, M'Baku and his men, Namor, various scientists from Shuri's labs, other Dora Milaje, Agent Ross, and some more of her friends." I list, "... and bucky"
"Bucky? Are you going to be okay?"
"Yea, I'll be fine. Shuri promised me liquor and dancing, so I'll be focused on that"
"Say the word and I will web his arm up."
Laughing and nudging him I say, "Thank you for the support brother"
When we arrive we see several people sitting down around a campfire and a few others at the beach bar. Music is playing and people are dancing, There were several tiki lamps and string lights all around the area which set the vibe very nicely.
"Millaenyia!!" Shuri yells and runs toward me
"I'm so happy you are here. Come, let's get you a drink." She begins to pull me away
"Wait I can't just leave Peter!"
"He's fine! Peter, my friend Riri is over by the campfire. She recreated Stark tech in a run-down garage. You both may have a lot in common; she would love to hear about your spider abilities. Go, mingle, be free." She says with a wave of her hand and continues to pull me away
"I'll be okay Mills! Have fun!" Peter yells back
I mouth the words 'thank you back at him.
As we make our way over to the bar I see Bucky talking with Ayo off to the side of the party. They were always close, she helped him in his recovery from the winter soldier program. He admires her greatly.
I wonder what they are talking about.
We make it to the bar and I see Okoye sitting there sipping on something strong, looking like she's having a hard time.
I whisper to Shuri, "Is she okay?"
Shuri quietly responds, 'Her divorce is officially final. Bittersweet I suppose?"
"I can hear you both you know." Okoye annoyingly states, "And I'm fine, just thinking"
"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask
"Does talking involve my spear?" Okoye retorts
"Um, no?"
"There's your answer."
"You walked yourself into that one." Shuri laughs
"Hey, aren't you supposed to be getting me a drink?" I sarcastically ask
The Vibe:
Harry Styles - Woman (Audio)
We sit and join Okoye over a couple of drinks... and a couple of shots. Just laughing, catching up, and reminiscing about our previous missions. Genuinely having a good time.
I hiccup a little bit and say, "Okoye I cannot keep up with you, otherwise ill be making out with the porcelain God before the end of the night." We loudly laugh.
Namor and 2 of his people walk up to us and do a small bow. They are all dressed down in flowy robes; this seems to be Talokan's version of loungewear. Namors plus one's are blue skinned and were wearing the same face masks like the people I saw at his temple.
"Queen," Namor says
"Namor." Shuri dryly responds
"Okay, drop the bad vibes, you'll ruin my buzz. This is a celebration let's be nice. Okay friends?" I happily say
Oof I'm starting to feel those shots
"Fine." Shuri says, "I'm still not over you throwing water bombs at my mother & Riri; they could have died. But I can forget that for the night."
Namor says nothing but smiles and we kind of just stand there in silence for way too long.
I speak up to cut the tension, "Nice to meet you both, I'm Millie" I say to the new faces with a small wave.
Namor finally speaks "These are my top fighters, Namora and Attuma" Namor states
"Lovely to meet you" Namora speaks
Attuma just nods his head and diverges his attention to Okoye, "I was hoping to see you again warrior."
Smiling Okoye responds, "Were you looking for another ass whooping?" she quips
He chuckles, "If that's how you'll have me."
Oh, okay sir
Okoye stands and begins to walk away, "Come. I let you borrow one of my spears."
Nodding at Namor he quickly follows Okoye
Namora laughs, "She's been on his mind since they first fought."
Us ladies begin to laugh. Namor just stands there and stares at me, like he is not sure what to say. Shuri notices and speaks, "Namora, please walk with me, I'd love to get to know you a little bit." She then looks at me, "Millie you can keep Namor company." and with that, they begin to walk away.
I gesture for Namor to come and have a seat next to me, and he obliges.
"I'm glad you came tonight." I say," AND you brought friends. "
"It will be good to get our people acquainted with one another." he plainly replies
He looks tense. He's been out of his element for a while I'm sure he feels outnumbered.
I look to the bartender, "can you make him a drink, please? Something mild." The bartender makes him a tequila sunrise and places it on the bar. I pick it up and take a sip to make sure it's not too strong and hand it to Namor
"Try this, I assume you don't drink. This is super light mostly juice, but it will help you relax" I say
He takes the glass and has a sip, "This is awful, you willingly drink this?" I laugh and nod "why?" Namor asks
"I don't know. Society says it's good for you, so I blindly follow." I joke
He chuckles, "Ki'ichpan, You are no follower"
"There goes that flattery, sir." I laugh and playfully nudge his arm
"It's not flattery." Namor says, "I simply find you beautiful."
I nervous laugh and look away, I'm honestly kind of embarrassed. My resolve isn't as strong when alcohol is involved. If he keeps this up he'll know I'm a nervous mess under my stoicism.
He laughs again "Why do you look away? Do you not know of your beauty?"
All I can do is shrug as I was too embarrassed to speak. Gently but firmly, he takes my chin and turns me to look him in the eye, "I asked you a question."
Is he serious right now?
He repeats, "Do you not know of your beauty?"
I begin to sweat and get butterflies in my stomach, "I- I do know of my beauty." I quietly say
Without letting me go Namor says, "Say you're beautiful." he softly commands without breaking eye contact
"I'm beautiful," I basically whisper
"Be firm, wheres all that confidence Ki'ichpan?"
I clear my throat and sit up, "I'm beautiful." I firmly say
"There it is. There's that confidence and power " he releases me and takes another sip, "You are more powerful than you know, act like it."
Good lord, I hear something purring...
"Thank you... I think?"
"So, Millaenyia, what had you in distress earlier?" he asks
"Ooof, It's kinda a lot. I don't want to trauma dump on you when this is the 3rd time we ever spoke." I laugh
"I want to know all of you good and bad."
he is gonna make me act up
"long story short, my ex is here. It ended badly and this is the first time I've seen him since our breakup."
"I see. Can I ask what happened?"
"Yea. He left me. We both lost some important people in our life after the battle of the Earth. He took it hard and he couldn't handle both his mental health and nurturing a relationship." I take a long swig of my drink, "He broke it off in a letter. Isn't that shitty? Couldn't even do it in person. I swear it came out of nowhere, I was blindsided. I almost gave up my powers to grow old with him. Maybe he wasn't ready for that or it was too much too fast, but I was all in and he wasn't. On one hand, I can't be mad at him because I get where he's coming from, but on the other, I'm just sad. I'm thankful that it ended when it did, don't want to be in a relationship where the love is one-sided."
"You deserve better." Namor nonchalantly says
"Yea, Yea. I know, I know." I brush him off
"I'm serious. You deserve a man who will worship the ground you walk on. Someone who will end civilizations simply because you wish it so. You deserve an equal; give up your power for no man who wouldn't do the same."
I look at him in awe and he looks at me back. There was no hint of sarcasm in his voice, he was very serious. Before I could respond, Shuri yells for me to join her on the dance floor.
"Go have your fun." Namor states
I nod and get up to go to Shuri. Walking away I swear I feel him staring at me; I look back and he meets me with his gaze.
This man is doing things to me.
--------
The Vibe:
Cults - Gilded Lily
We were out until 3 in the morning, I had to practically carry Peter back to his room. He played flippy cup all night with Riri and the scientists, poor thing didn't realize he was sipping on jungle juice all night. The rest of the night was great I danced, drank, and I made new friends. Overall one of the best nights I've had in a while. Back in my room I change out of clothes and rinse off the sand from my body and wash off my makeup. I wrap a towel around me and head to my bedroom until I hear a knock on my door. I go to look out the peephole and see it was Bucky.
"Fuck" I whisper loudly and cover my mouth.
Maybe if I don't move he'll think I'm sleeping.
"I hear you in there."
I don't respond
"You can't avoid me forever Mills, I just want to talk."
Against my better judgment, I open the door, "James, it's late"
"It's James now?" he says shocked "Can I come in?"
I open the door further and let him in. "Respectfully can this be quick I have had a long few days"
"I just wanted to see how you were doing. Make sure you're okay."
"Don't pretend to care." I scoff
"Come on that's not fair. "
"You know what else is not fair, being broken up with over the 1940s version of a text."
"Admittedly I could have done it better." he says, "I'm sorry Millie. This hasn't been easy for me either. Just because I broke it off doesn't mean I stopped caring about you"
"Don't do that, you don't get to play the victim." I sneer
"You don't seem so hurt hanging out with the 'Royal Fish Man' tonight or with your weird London friend." He says "Fuck" he whispers to himself
"How do you know about that? Are you fucking watching me?" I yell
"No!" He yells. He brushes his hand through his hair and looks down, "Okay yes, but only once. I found out you were coming tonight and I got curious. I'm sorry I just missed you; my intention wasn't to stalk you and your little boyfriend."
"Impact over Intention Bucky!" I yell "I will not apologize for fucking another guy. You don't get to come in here and make me feel bad for trying to move on. You hurt me, you left me, and you made that decision on your own. You don't get to heal and come back and pick up where we left off, I am angry with you. You know when I saw you this morning I felt like shit because I missed you, but I'm realizing I deserve better. I'm not angry that you left me, I'm angry that you didn't talk to me, and not doing it in person robbed me of my closure. I'm glad you are figuring your shit out but I am a person with feelings too and you disregarded that. Bucky part of me will always love you but you fucked up and there is no coming back from that." I breath. That was a lot and felt so good to get out but he looks like a puppy with his tail tucked between his legs. I feel kinda bad, but not bad enough to take what I said back.
Bucky finally speaks, "I'm sorry, I really am. I broke it off because I couldn't give you what you needed. You were going to give up everything for me. What kind of man would I be if I allowed that? You're right, you do deserve better, and I will never be able to give you what you need."
"What the hell is that I need huh? Since you like making decisions for me."
"An equal." he says
Whoa. I hear Namors voice in my head, "You deserve an equal; give up your power for no man who wouldn't do the same."
I get the chills. Eventually, I calm down, "Look I'm sorry for yelling but I won't apologize for what I said. I'm taking back my power and moving the fuck on, you should too." I go to the door and open it, "One day we will be friends again but today is not that day, please leave." I say holding my hand out to the door.
He nods and walks out closing the door behind him.
I let out a long sigh and begin to cry. It wasn't a sad cry or a remorseful one; it was a cry of relief, I may have been harsh but he needed to hear that.
Hopefully, he'll do better with the next girl
I begin to walk away and finally head to bed. Just as I was about to drop the towel I hear a knock at my door again. Frustrated I march over and irritatedly open the it, "Bucky please stop, I've had enough yelling for the night"
Oh shit
It was not Bucky. It was Namor standing there looking increasingly annoyed. "Bucky was here?"
#Fanfic#Peter Parker#Spiderman#Black panther#Wakanda forever#Namor#Tenoch huerta#K’uk’ulkan#Original character#black girl oc#Namor x reader#Mcu shuri#Mcu namor#Mcu#Talokan trio#Talokan#Attuma attoye#Namora#Marc spector#Jake lockely#Steven grant#Wanda maximoff#Scarlet witch#Bucky#James buchanan barnes#Sebastian stan#Tom holland
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What happened with Vlad in this AU? Since he seems to still be on talking terms with the Fentons
"patrick bateman if he were into grimoire satanism" is the best way to put it but i'm so glad i can blab ab this at length
So I imagine that the UWM trio began spectrology via psychical research, but Jack and Maddie turn to more accepted science in grad school while Vlad veers downstream into witchcraft. Vlad stays friends* with them but hares off to do his own thing, aka business school and shady shit.
(*Vlad and Maddie date briefly in undergrad. They break up mutually, but Vlad's attitude sours once Maddie started dating Jack, and "shady shit" includes esoteric attempts to separate them. Vlad's view of Maddie is an incredibly dissonant one: he resents her for being better suited to Jack than to him, but convinces himself that that would change if Jack were out of the picture.)
Their friendship never ends after college, but as most college friendships do they drift apart. Vlad is Jack's best man and agrees to be Danny's godfather, but he's relegated to "special occasion" status for the family. Jack and Maddie also assume that Vlad gives up on witchcraft after college, but really he devotes more time to it, calling on malevolent forces for personal gain.
Of course, all luck comes with a price, and naturally the price on Vlad's head is his soul. However, as Vlad's resentment towards Jack turns to action, the devil on his side demands more and more. Vlad moves to Amity Park, becomes mayor, and earns the approval of Amity Park's upper class, at the expense of his humanity. He starts having to consume human life to replenish his own, which is where the vampire motif comes in. He has his heart sitting in his fireplace because as long as it beats, he can live, and the demon can covet it as interest (see this piece⬇️).
The demon (who can be interpreted as Plasmius if that's your thing) delights in Vlad's misery and has no intention of giving him what he truly wants. It serves as a deus ex machina occasionally, but mostly serves to remind Vlad that the more he tries to take, the more he has to give.
Spoilers for Portrait of a Bedsheet, but I imagine that the culmination of Vlad's arc is that he actually does get Maddie and Danny on his side, very briefly, in a way that superficially satisfies his mental image of it – but it costs him the last shred of his humanity. His relationship to the Fentons (especially to Maddie) is ruined in the fallout, but I'm still mulling over the specifics of how it happens.
The Patrick Bateman reference at the beginning applies to his demeanor overall: obsessively superficial, disingenuous, insecure, callous, and self-obsessed at the expense of everyone and everything around him. He's the type of out-of-touch that can justify murder to an eyewitness, because he'll never have to face a real consequence for it so why bother acting ashamed? Everyone is a tool to him – including/especially Danny, who Vlad still sees as both the only person who could understand him and a bonus conquest by proxy of Maddie.
tl;dr: he's an even bigger jerk than in canon in proportion to a higher rating, but he's also more pathetic so it all balances out. :-)
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The Astronaut's Wife (a Film Review)
Negative Reviews Aren’t Necessarily a Bad Thing
Prompted by Tubi to finally watch The Astronaut’s Wife before it left the streaming platform on Friday, June 3oth, I went into it kind of expecting a less than stellar film. I was, however, cautiously optimistic that I’d like it. I was hoping to find one of those rare gems of filmmaking that I’d, at the very least, respect and appreciate, and maybe even love. Those type of experiences don’t happen often, but when they do, it’s worth every second to risk it. To better illustrate my point, it’s entirely possible that I might not have tried it at all, were it not for the film’s alleged saving grace: the performances.
According to pretty most reviews, (both professional and everyday consumers,) the one quality that saves it from being tossed in the proverbial rubbish heap is the performances of its stars, Johnny Depp and Charlize Theron. They’re said to be on-point. That alone convinced me.
”What I am is a true American hero. Now, the President of the United States of America said that, and you heard him.”
Written and directed by Rand Ravich, The Astronaut’s Wife reeled me in with its opening scene, and it isn’t long before I’m transported by it. Some of those first scenes are beautiful to behold, and I don’t compliment it lightly. It’s fascinating to simply watch the actions of the main players and listen to their carefully chosen words. It’s through those that the audience learns about the close-knit relationship between Depp’s Spencer and Theron’s Jillian, whom he affectionately refers calls Jill. Their marriage is complicated, and is seemingly made stronger by their mutual respect and a deep, admirable love. There’s a lot at stake, and in Ravich’s directorial debut, he makes those stakes clear.
Par for the course, it’s not long before everything they thought they knew and believed to be true comes crashing down like a riotous game of Jenga. Their world can only implode. The latter is emphasized for dramatic effect, because one of the common criticisms speaks directly toward this. With an approval rating of just fifteen percent on Rotten Tomatoes, and an audience score of thirty-three percent, the critic’s consensus is that the film “moves at a snail’s pace and fails to generate enough intrigue to keep viewers interested.”
Not to be dismissive of many, highly regarded reviews (even Siskel & Ebert said that while they didn’t hate The Astronaut’s Wife, untilmately they were apathetic towards it,) but the first act isn't meant to fly by with lightening-quick speed. It’s just not. Furthermore, the pacing is near perfection. In fact, I wouldn’t object to a little more time with Mr. and Mrs. Armacost, to sit with them before the inevitable craziness ensues. Instead of a plot moving at breakneck speed, it’s a predominantly taut, psychological thriller set in a similar vein as The Invasion of the Body Snatchers, with a fairly even balance of science fiction and horror.
As the title suggests, the main focal point revolves around Jillian, as it explores the impact on her psyche and her physical and mental well-being. Theron gives everything to her portrayal of the doting wife and the passionate educator. In many ways, she’s the victim, though she doesn’t come across as such. She has to be the pillar of strength, because her character is intentionally left in the dark and she has to discover what really happened in those mysterious two minutes of her husband’s failed mission. There’s more to everything at stake for her character, but anything more would spoil it. One scene, in particular, between Spencer and Jill, was extremely moving and contrary to many criticisms, the dialogue is on-point. It’s powerful, relatable, and it never feels disingenuous. There’s a strong resemblance to real life to it, almost as though it was taken from an actual conversation.
None of it seems unrealistic or far-fetched, despite it being science fiction. And that’s saying a lot, because there are plenty of stories in the genre that feel a little unrealistic, and require the suspension of disbelief. I’m not even entirely certain how the filmmakers made it seem so grounded in reality, while simultaneously keeping solid ground in the speculative nature of the story. In response, I can only shake my head in disbelief, wondering if the naysayers somehow forgot that it’s predominantly sci-fi, a genre that almost celebrates the improbable, the unnatural, and the fantastical. Plus, it’s fiction. Escapism at its finest. Making sense or being completely logical isn’t always a necessary ingredient. Why else do we consume fiction, if not for escapism?
Actually, with the exception of the ending, there isn’t a lot that’s extravagant or impossible. But I love the dramatic culmination of events. It doesn’t really bother me that what took place can’t happen like it did. In context with everything that came before, the resolution felt natural, like it was meant to be. Earnestly, I can’t imagine it ending any other way.
”There is something I need to tell you, Jill...About what happened. All there was...was the cold. I knew what the cold was...it was death. Then the cold faded and then I felt warmth. It was the warmth of you.”
Now, was the basic concept of the film unoriginal? To some extent, yes. Frankly, it’s something that the sci-fi/horror community has seen many times. At the same time, though, it’s not always about originality. Sometimes, execution takes precedence, and I love that about this film. The thing I appreciate most about The Astronaut’s Wife is that its emphasis is on the characters (Jill, specifically,) as opposed to the Other. There’s a beautiful examination of what it means to be human, to be flawed as well as moral. Whereas a lot of stories have a tendancy to simplify good and evil, the film seems to cast a spotlight of understanding on both sides of the coin, and that’s very refreshing.
The outstanding performances weren’t limited to Johhny Depp and Charlize Theron, either. Girl, Interrupted’s Clea DuVall’s portrayal of Jillian’s empathetic sibling was nothing short of moving, and my appetite for her scenes insatiable. And almost juxtaposed with DuVall’s Nan was Joe Morton’s Sherman Reese (Speed,) a disgrunted NASA representative who might or might not be in his sound mind.
Needless to say, I love everything about this film. The cinematography is beautiful. The haunting notes of the score is the perfect accompaniment, complete with a sense of palpable dread and suspense. The special effects are neither over or underdone, and kudos to all involved for not making it look or feel like CGI. I could go on and on, but reading my high praises is probably starting to sound repitive and nauseating, so I’ll wrap this up.
If you’re at all curious, I encourage you to give The Astronaut’s Wife and chance and form your own opinions. You might just find another film that you enjoy. If not, then at least you can honestly say that you saw it, didn’t like it, and give your reasons why. If nothing else, go into it strictly for the rock star performances. I hope that I never forget this underrated, extremely polarizing film.
Rating: 5/5 stars
#filmreview#sci-fi#horror#directorialdebut#charlize theron#johnnydepp#polarizing#underrated#clea duvall#space#formyourownopinions#tubi#streaming#my first tumblr post
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Tag people you want to get to know better
Thanks @strangesoulmates for tagging me!
Three ships (As I’m writing this out I’m realising they all have pretty similar themes, I guess I have somewhat consistent taste, this is all just reminders of humanity, enemies to lovers, trying to kill each other and excuses to cover my blorbos in blood.)
1.) Alex/Yassen
Can I be controversial and admit this one took a lot of convincing? Originally I was expecting the fandom to be more into ‘unlikely parental figure’ Yassen (which is a trope I’m an absolute sucker for.) but any way these two characters interact is interesting to me, and I’ve definitely come round to it from a perspective of this is only ‘healthy’ because it’s them and no one else can really understand them like the other can, and if it’s not ‘healthy’ it’s all dubious and quite fun. Big sucker for the (sort of one sided?) enemies to lovers, borderline obsession, as character foils of each other, with Yassen kind of representing Alex’s future and the dichotomy of like... sunshine puppy and murder kitty vibes. Then there’s the loyalty to each other before their ‘side’, different worlds and different morals but a unique understanding of each other.
(Also worth mentioning that I like Yassen with basically any Rider - I don’t see John/Yassen as anything but unhealthy hero worship/daddy issues/manipulation but that itself is still interesting, and I’m a huge sucker for Ian/Yassen, either as like an old married couple or people who have a few brief, but very intense encounters throughout their lives. I feel like there’s been a bit of a ‘Yiannaissance’ recently that I’m really enjoying. Do we have an official ship name? Yian? Iassen? Neither seem great.)
2.) Jonathon Reid/Geoffrey McCullum.
Peak different sides, enemies to lovers, vampire hunter and powerful newborn vampire in 1918 London in the grip of a pandemic, great gothic industrial vibe. I played this game obsessively during lockdown. (Can’t imagine why.) Themes of duty and purpose and humanity and horror, the game sort of rushes you into a forced romance with one of the female characters but the chemistry between these two is insane they are kind of obsessed with each other and the fight that happens when one of them tries to kill the other is just TEEMING with homoeroticism.
3.) Villanelle/Eve Polastri
First two seasons of Killing Eve are some of the best television ever created. The theatricality of the murders, and the comedy contrasted with some just devastating moments, the OUTFITS. That ending really took the wind out of my sails with this one and kind of spoiled it for me but what was there with the themes of mutual obsession, both trying to kill each other, Villanelle drawing out this dark side of Eve that has always been there, Eve drawing out this humanity that also been in Villanelle, just the whole vibe of being the only people in the world who could possibly understand the other properly and hating that so much you try and kill each other before realising they can’t be apart.
First Ship - I think the first one I really went insane for was Morrigan/Warden from DA:O. Morrigan helped me realise I was a lesbian I was so in love with her. Still am tbh.
Last song - ‘King’ by Florence + the Machine, I went to her concert this week and she ran right past me it was amazing.
Last Movie - finally got round to watching Everything Everywhere All at Once, so incredible!
Currently reading - chapter 3 of ‘The Viking Diaspora’ by Judith Jesch for my seminar tomorrow. (I really want to read more novels this year!)
Currently watching - His Dark Materials, interspersed with weird niche YouTube video essays, and mildly embarrassing amounts of Bluey.
Currently consuming: last thing I ate was some cinnamon raisin bread with one of the fancy jams I got in the jam advent calendar I bought myself. Now I need to figure out where I can find pineapple and yuzu jam bc I want to eat it forever.
Currently craving: supermarket bakery chocolate chip cookies, and some sweet and spicy fried chicken.
Tagging @countessrivers and whoever else fancies!
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So, about Gellert and Albus and their canonically passionate summer affair. I know this is an incredibly cliched and rather ridiculous question... but who do you think topped in bed? What was their sexual dynamic?
Hi anon!
These are my preferences. Disclaimer: of course everyone can have a different preference!
Disclaimer 2: NSFW, minors DNI!
I like to think they switched and experimented and they were sweet and passionate about it.
Sometimes I headcanon that they had sex for the first time on their wedding night, but usually I think they were so deeply in love and passion they made love as soon as they could.
I've seen some arguing that they were friends before becoming lovers, but I disagree: I think it was love on first sight for Albus (meanwhile Gellert already had visions of his soulmate) and they instantly were mutually attracted and charmed.
I think they kissed the second they were alone without Bathilda and they couldn't get enough one of the other.
Tell me everything. Your fears, your projects, what you like, what you hate, your fave kind of tea, I want to know everything about you.
And they were both virgin and really really turned on. They didn't wait long before consuming their love. (I concede that Geller could have already had sex, but Albus at least was a virgin).
As I said, I think they switched, but I also think Gellert topped more often. Gellert was more sure of his body and liked the control the position allowed, and taking care of Albus in such an intimate way.
Albus was just happy to let Gellert explore his body and being the focus of his attention and care.
Since I'm convinced they met during the years, I feel like Albus preferred Gellert taking the lead and topping him, he liked to have proof that Gellert viscerally desired him and was able to still be a tender lover. These moments were like opium.
Gellert was also a natural, a very good and generous lover (he liked to suck Albus off), and Albus too was tender and passionate, their sex life was very fulfilling during that summer.
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Who Would take the Lao Mang Long Soup?
((You know for a while, I can’t help but think about which characters from other franchises might be tempted to consume the Lao Mang Long soup.
For those who don’t remember, the Lao Mang Long soup is a special soup from Xiaolin Showdown containing the meat of dragons. No seriously, the recipe requires an entire dragon.
This is the soup Hannibal Bean used to turn Chase to the dark side by taking advantage of his insecurities, promising him power and recognition to outdo his rival and friend, Monk Guan. The soup does indeed grant power and immortality to whomever devours it (as well as the ability to transform into a scary lizard) in exchange for their soul. Being reminded of this got me thinking? Who else would likely drink the soup?
My first thought was Sasuke Uchiha from Naruto. For a while I figured he’d drink the soup in a heartbeat. But then I realized it actually depends on when Hannibal Bean would try to get to Sasuke. If it’s post Shippuden or pre-chunin exams, then I doubt he’ll go for it. If it’s post chunin exams but pre-retrieval ark, then Sasuke would definitely take it if it means killing Itachi, but then Hannibal Bean would have to deal with Orochimaru getting in his way, leading to see who would corrupt the shinobi to their side first. That or he would bide his time and get Sasuke to take the soup right before Orochimaru tries to take his body, giving Sasuke a bigger boost in order to actually kill him, but that doesn’t guarantee that he won’t turn on Hannibal either.
Another interesting candidate would be Prince Zuko from Avatar. I say interesting, because I can totally see Hannibal Bean trying to get him to drink the soup in order to hunt down the avatar and regain approval from his father. I would love to see this dynamic play out, like Hannibal trying to be the little demon on Zuko’s shoulders, further tempting him down the dark path. Ultimately though, I honestly don’t think Zuko would actually consume the soup in the end. He would likely be driven close, but with a mutual understanding of Aang’s struggles combined with Iroh’s care and attention for him, I’m more confident that Zuko would reject the bean in the end. Now here’s where things might get interesting...
Akuma. Now, I’m not all that familiar with Street Fighter lore, so take what I say here with a grain of salt, but I do think Akuma would likely be a target on Hannibal’s radar for corruption. That being said, the only way I would see Akuma actually taking the soup would be before he gets corrupted by the Satsui no Hado, because at that point, I feel like Akuma would prefer to rely on his own power than some mystic dragon soup that a random bean would be offering him. Though could you imagine how much more powerful he would be if he did take the soup based on what we know of Chase Young’s abilities? A man without soul wandering around crushing other souls to dust.
Next we have both Liu Kang and Kung Lao. This should come to no surprise, even for Liu Kang. Remember in the alternate timeline Omi created where he failed to convince Chase Young, Hannibal Bean successfully tempted Monk Guan to his side. That being said, I can definitely see different timelines where at least one of these monks would give into temptation and consume the Lao Mang Long soup, especially Kung Lao as one can argue that he’s practically like Chase before he turned evil. And before anyone mentions Shao Kahn, yeah he would definitely take the soup without question because...power. The problem with that is Kahn has several souls in his body so it’s not like he’ll be losing anything as a result and will no doubt betray Hannibal after getting said power boost.
Kazuya Mishima. Ehehehe...I mean if you think about it, he already took the soup in a way, but let’s ignore that for this discussion. And now I can’t help but think of Kazuya getting some bad-ass lizard devil form. Honestly, I can see Kazuya going either way, taking the soup so he can kill Heihachi and Jin or being arrogant enough to reject it and rely on his own demonic power. Regardless of if he takes it or not, one thing is for certain. He is definitely sending Hannibal into the Ying Yang world just like what Chase did after he chooses. That betrayal is guaranteed to happen. Okay, one more person for today...
Vergil. I’m going to be honest...I can’t really say for sure on this one. One on hand, it’s not like he hasn’t done this stunt before as this is exactly what he did in Devil May Cry 5, but on the other hand, he’s not exactly going to be trusting of someone like Hannibal Bean, especially due to his experience with Arkham back in Devil May Cry 3. And even in the event where he does drink the soup, he’s still likely to turn against Hannibal the exact same way Chase Young did. I dunno, what do you guys think?))
#xiaolin showdown#mortal kombat#tekken#street fighter#Avatar The Last Airbender#naruto#devil may cry
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Playlist Analysis: #10 - Let Me Drown
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#10. Let Me Drown – Orville Peck
This is an Aziraphale song.
Overview:
This song involves the singer convincing someone to let them go, even if it’s painful. Saying it’s ok to let go and the singer is accepting their fate, even welcoming it, ready to go to the other side - whatever that might be. This song represents Aziraphale’s decision to literally leave the mortal realm and silently asking Crowley to let him go since it’s clear Crowley won’t be coming along.
The water and drowning metaphors also call images of baptism. The symbolic drowning to one’s sinful ways and rebirth into righteousness. A symbolic cleansing of the body and spirit. I don't think of it in the sense of Aziraphale needing to be cleansed to go to Heaven, but in the metaphor of his new commitment to doing what is right instead of what is Good™.
Placement here is post-kiss. We have a moment of doubt followed by a firm decision to fight for Them and for the world. Aziraphale has made his choice, it’s too late to talk any more about it, and this song represents that last look before boarding the elevator.
Lyrics:
Been finding it hard to be kind
Since I've been lost out there, losing my mind
And I still keep on searching for what I can't find
Let me drown
Aziraphale has been on Earth since the beginning. In season 1, the angels postulate that he’s been down there too long. He’s too human. He’s spent too much time among humans and now he acts like one. Humans have free will, and he’s had free will for the last few years. But after Jim’s mystery was uncovered and the emotional disaster after that, Aziraphale is left still looking for a way to safely love his demon. He must sacrifice this life.
Don't wanna wash you away
I swear there's good things that are coming your way
And I can't be the one left here dragging you down
Let me drown
Just because you have to leave someone, doesn’t mean you want to cleanse yourself of them. Aziraphale certainly isn’t going to be washing those lips any time soon. (I bet he doesn’t consume a thing until he and Crowley make up.) Aziraphale is fully planning to go to Heaven and dismantle the system and stop the second coming from destroying the world; all good things. He can only hope that Crowley knows him well enough to understand and to not interfere, or to see when interference is necessary.
Only one knew my name
Nothing left but the summer rain
Drag me 'round 'til I never complain
Let me drown
Crowley isn’t literally the only one who knows Aziraphale’s name, but he’s the only one who truly knows who Aziraphale is deep down and intimately. Summer rain here representing the sadness interrupting a bright, vibrant period of emotions. All together, these lyrics evoke the sadness of the end of a time spent with someone who knew you better than anyone else. Someone with whom you spent all your happy, sad, and quiet moments.
And then suddenly we're writing out the same old lie
When water is all around
They both tried to confess their love. It didn’t take. The danger is present; the water is rising and these two can’t swim. They are back to their same lie they’ve told themselves and each other over and over. “I don’t need you!” “And the feeling is mutual!”
Baby, I can be the one you drown tonight
Well, I had sun in my eyes and I'd confide
We're no worse off than the worst of 'em, it's fine
They can’t swim but if Aziraphale can take this burden, make that self-sacrifice, he’s going to drown for both of them. There’s a chance this metaphorical death could result in a permanent end to their relationship, or even Aziraphale’s existence, but he’ll fight uphill into the blinding sunlight to try and save everything, and he’ll consider himself no worse off for having done so.
I know with pleasure comes pain
I figured we were the same
But as I get older I get more afraid
Let me drown
Aziraphale knows they won’t be free and safe without a painful fight. Through more and more experience he’s seen it repeatedly proven true. He’s been afraid for Crowley’s safety for hundreds of years and after they both faced trial in season 1, he knows that they had bought some time then, but that reprieve has ended. The Metatron made his veiled threats and Aziraphale heard them. He is now much more aware of their level of danger and must allow himself to be separated from Crowley.
So, no I can't be kind since I lost my mind
And this town just ain't big enough for the both of us now
Let me drown
No, I can't be kind since I lost my mind
And this town just ain't big enough for the both of us now
Let me drown
Aziraphale is kind, nice, and he loves forgiveness and doing the right thing. But now that he’s going to Heaven to run things, he’s going to have to adapt very quickly to the way things operate upstairs. Kindness might not be an option. And his last interactions with Crowley certainly weren't kind either (whether intentionally or habitually). He’s going to have to learn to wield his authority fully, and there’s no room for him to be hanging around Whickber street while he’s doing so. In his mind, he is begging for Crowley’s blessing to make this sacrifice.
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#good omens#aziraphale#crowley#brain rot#music analysis#i spent a normal amount of time on this#therapy for good omens 2#good omens meta#ineffable husbands#ineffable divorce
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Anthony’s Stupid Daily Blog (467): Tue 27th Jun 2023
Read about the horrifying case of the “house party killer”. This was a school kid named Tyler who hated his parents for not letting him have any fun and specially have a party. One day Tyler grew so tired of his parents for being, in his opinion, so overbearing that he killed both of them and hid the bodies in the house then advertised a huge party at his house which hundreds of people came to, completely unaware that his dead parents were in the bedroom. Now if this had been the plot of the Kevin and Perry movie I think it would be a lot less fondly remembered but it would have gone down as one of the most shocking twists in movie history. The really sinister thing about this incident is that Tyler actually confessed what he had done to his best friend who remained at the party completely shocked by what he had just been made aware of. A mutual friend then came up and got them to pose for a photo of the two friends and it’s damn sinister to look at this photograph knowing what the two friends know. Looking at the friends face you can tell that he’s just wondering what to do and whether he should tell anyone but you can’t even begin to imagine what Tyler is thinking at the moment this pic was snapped. He has somewhat of a blank expression on his face but he’s also holding up a cup in celebratory toasting fashion. It’s hard to tell if he’s consumed by regret and he’s just putting on a front for the camera or if he genuinely has no remorse over what he has done.
I also re-watched the amazing music video for the Aphex Twin song “Come To Daddy”. This thing still looks scarier and more well made than 90% of the horror movies I’ve seen. I can’t believe that such a niche musical artist managed to secure the kind of budget necessary to produce these kind of amazing effects. The shot where the demon is screaming into the face of the old lady in particular is stunning and u like anything I’ve seen in a movie or TV show. Why would anyone have invested into making this? It’s not the kind of thing that’s ever going to have mainstream appeal. You couldn’t be showing this on Top of the Pops or on a music channel in he middle of the day (sure enough it ended up getting banned by MTV for being too scary). Maybe Aphex Twin caught a rich music mogul on a good day and convinced him to plow a good chunk of change into this musical nightmare.
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“I can’t be bribed with goods and services,” said Palamedes, “but I can’t be bribed with moral platitudes, either. My conscience doesn’t permit me to help anyone do what we have all embarked upon.”
“You don’t understand—”
Palamedes said savagely, “Captain, God help you when you understand. My only consolation is that you won’t be able to put any responsibility on my head.”
“I came to the same conclusion you did,” said Palamedes, but his voice was cold and inflexible. “I discarded it as ghastly. Ghastly, and obvious.”
Palamedes probably figures it out first. By the first time we’re permitted to see him and Harrow collaborating in any form, he’s already talking about the megatheorem idea, but his interaction with Judith comes much earlier. Only one set of bodies is around, and Gideon and Harrow have only completed two trials.
He’s still already reacting violently to what the basic megatheorem suggests, and he doesn’t trust any of the necromancers in the building -- save for Harrow.
“You are still convinced by your… megatheorem idea, then.”
“Yes. Aren’t you?”
“No. It’s sensational.”
“But if I’m right—if Lyctorhood is nothing more or less than the synthesis of eight individual theorems…”
Harrow did not speak. There was a long moment, and Gideon thought that Palamedes had lapsed into thought. But then he said crisply: “Then it’s wrong. There’s a flaw in the underlying logic. The whole thing is an ugly mistake.”
Of our three noted geniuses (Ianthe, Palamedes, Harrow), Harrow is the one we don’t witness coming to the obvious conclusion. There’s no arguing her brilliance or determination, but when a source for all the energy the trials demands is brought up, she looks outward -- even after Gideon’s proven essential to solving both.
“The tests are not concerned with some frankly sickening rubric of sentiment and obedience; they’re testing me and me alone.”
Palamedes and Camilla are the necromancer-cavalier pair we see that are most balanced. They’re companions, and they each use their strengths to complement and defend each other. They’re on good terms. They live in each other’s pocket. They’re the ideal way for this bond to play out meaning of course Palamedes has to explode, because otherwise he and Camilla unlock the entirety of perfect Lyctorhood without much fuss.
When Ianthe isn’t verbally abusing Babs, she’s eating pieces of him. They aren’t the Eighth, but it’s very clear that Ianthe recognizes Babs’ use. He’s there to serve her.
Harrow and Gideon are just learning what it means to be necromancer and cavalier together, with their foundation firmly seeped in mutual destruction.
Harrow rejects the megatheorem conclusion when it’s presented. Even though, as Palamedes points out, it’s rather obvious. Ianthe makes that same point. Take the trials, synthesize them, remember that there were 16 but only 8 Lyctors, bam. You’ve got a very basic idea that should be impossible to look away from.
Harrow, born from the deaths of 200 children, who can be coaxed into siphoning but whose automatic reaction to it is refusal, turns away from the obvious. Yes, a power source is needed. Yes, she’s been using her cavalier as that power source.
No, that’s not the answer.
Palamedes never entertains sacrificing Camilla as an option. It’s foul and horrendous, and he’ll have no part in it.
Ianthe has zero problem consuming one more piece of Babs; that’s all he’s been for the whole time anyway.
Harrow rejects the idea so completely that she’s the last of the “I am the greatest necromancer of my generation” crowd to land on the final conclusion. Even with Gideon standing right next to her, and proving routinely useful as a battery, she dismisses the megatheorem for her secret door theory. She looks for a way outside of eating her cavalier whole.
That’s why Palamedes trusts her.
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Ok prompt! Sy is teaching you how to cook and maybe things get frisky ? 😁
Oooo I like this. Its not 100% on the nose but this is where the muse took me.
Did you want a novel? Because, I hope you like novels.
Warnings: chili with beans, sweet cornbread, swearing, smut
"Listen hear, you chicken fried fuck. If you don't like my cooking, you are welcome to eat something else at the damn pot luck!" I snap at a grumpy retired soldier who was talking trash about my chili recipe. Like always. Whenever we have a party, he has to say something about how I'm dressed, what I brought, or the beer I was drinking.
"All I'm saying here, California, is that where I'm from we don't put beans in our chili. And don't get me started on this abomination you call cornbread. Why is it sweet, why are there vegetables in my bread?" He says in his drawl.
"Because honey and roasted jalapenos taste good together!"
"I guess. You don't need to fuss so much Princess, I'll gladly show you how to make real Texan food. Make some wife material out of you." He smirked. I think he knew he was getting under my skin.
"Come on, Sy, give her a break. Take a bite of her cornbread with the chili, they are delicious together." One of our mutual friends told him when he could see that I was not having any more of his attitude.
I walked away from the conversation, feeling incredibly salty. The man was Syverson, we had been in the same group of friends for the past couple years and honestly he was usually at least cordial with me, but the sheer audacity of his tone today. The rest of the party was really fun, at least. Occasionally, I would catch eyes the color of the ocean after a storm staring me down. He kept looking like he wanted to say something to me but I would find reasons to leave the room. Fortunately there was always a way to get out and around.
Towards the end of the evening, I go outside to enjoy the cooling air and watch the stars, listen to a couple of the guys from inside sit on the tailgate of a truck and talk about football or something. The breeze would kick up occasionally and I could smell an orange tree blooming in the distance.
"Hey, oh shit, I didn't mean to startle you." I jumped damn near out of my skin when the grump showed up out of nowhere. "I actually really wanted to say that I'm sorry, I can be a real asshole sometimes. You are usually more aware of it than others. I'm used to giving people a hard time. Your food was delicious. I just don't know how to talk to you sometimes."
I looked at the large man skeptically. I'm not used to people going from snarky to nice to me. "Thank you for apologizing. Glad you liked it, Chicken Fried. You can just talk to me like anyone else, I don't mind some teasing, but you just know how to push my buttons."
Sy looked at his feet for a moment. "I will be nicer to you, I promise."
"I'm sure." I had heard that before.
"I still think mines better," back to sounding arrogant already, "I am willing to bet that it would blow your mind."
"Do you really want to bet?"
"Yeah... sure. I'll bet you. If my chili it better than yours.... you have to go on a date with me."
"Is that how you get most of your dates these days? Tinder just isn't cutting it anymore?" I tease. He is actually kind of good looking. Sort of. If you are into that hand crafted by the gods kind of look. I'm not saying I am, but I could get the appeal.
"You'd be surprised. Most of the women I meet want to figure out what's wrong with me. Almost 40, never married, I have a job I like. They keep waiting for my skeletons to come out of the closet. Like shit, girl, I just don't like olives or sweet relish. I think I'm pretty cool otherwise." He said talking with his hands out stretched. I think he might have been being earnest with me, but his tone is almost always sarcastic.
"You were in the military, right?"
"Yeah."
"That's what's wrong with you." The big man started laughing harder than I thought he would.
"Well, California. You up for it?"
"I don't know Chicken Fried, I don't like dating, I would really just like something casual, low maintenance. What happens when I win?"
"When?" He chuckles. "If you are looking for something casual and low maintenance, baby, there is a reason when I was still in the Army they called me Captain Cunnilingus."
"It sounds like either way you win." I smirk, "I would need a real incentive to try to beat you."
"How about bragging rights?"
"If I win... you shave your beard. Then I get to use your face as a chair." He looked shocked.
"Fine, when I win, you have to wear a dress on our date, and heels. Maybe even some of that shit you all put on your lips with the glitter and fruity flavors."
"Ok, now that's unreasonable. I don't even own heels."
"I'll buy you some." Well color me impressed. We decide on the terms of the bet. We would invite a couple of friends over to his place next Sunday and they would pick a winner with a blind taste test. We would also have one canned chili and one restaurant chili to make it a little more interesting.
Sunday came, and we all gathered in his house. This was the best batch of chili I have ever made. Fresh peppers, bacon, beer and some good quality beef all swam together in a symphony of flavors. When I walked into his house, the smell was... pungent. I could smell cooking vinegar. It wasn't bad but there was something just a little off putting.
"Glad you showed up, Princess." He looked me up and down. to surprise him just a little, I did show up in a dress. I figured a special occasion needed a special outfit.
I looked over at the big man as he took my slow cooker from my hands and plugged it in for me. To be fair to both of us, we had enough time to set up sides and toppings. I even baked more cornbread. Sy made his own savory cornbread that he pulled out of the oven in a cast iron skillet.
"It was my mama's." He told me when I asked about it.
"You bake also?"
"Sometimes, if the mood hits me. I like making peach cobbler too. If you are lucky, I'll make you some. Maybe after our date."
"So sure of yourself, Chicken Fried. I hope you got some good shaving cream and a new razor, you'll need it." In his kitchen, I lifted the hem of my sundress clear up to my naked hip showing him that I was ready to win this bet of ours. His pupils blew out with lust as he stepped up to me.
"Princess, you are a hell of a tease. I have wanted you so badly ever since the first time we met." He breathed, lusty and hot. He pinned me to the counter, radiating his desire. He bit his lip, looking me up and down, he looked like he wanted to kiss me or maybe consume me whole. Suddenly he pulls away, leaving me breathless. "We will have company soon. I need to walk this off, but I really do want to continue this conversation when we don't have to risk being interrupted."
Before anyone could walk in on us, Syverson rushed up to me and kissed me more passionately. My knees buckle for a second and its like I've been set on fire.
When our friends came into his house, he set up bowls, spoons, Fritos and cheese. He set up blind tastings for the guests, only he and I knew what everyone was eating.
The canned chili was a flop. The restaurant chili was a better batch but it wasn't as good. When our friends tasted my chili, they all keep saying how wonderful it was.
Then we tried Sy's. Everyone was quiet for a moment and then the group started to try to figure out what it was about the chili that we didn't like. It was too sweet as far as I was concerned and there was a weird aftertaste. It was an overwhelming agreement that Sy's chili was terrible. After we cleaned up his kitchen, Sy was pouting about having lost.
"So, when would you like for me to shave my beard?"
"Maybe later tonight. I think we have to finish that conversation we started earlier."
"Oh yeah, California?" He said, standing close to me. He grabbed me by my hips and lifted me to the counter top. I lace my fingers through his beard hair and pull him closer so I can finally kiss him again. He broke away from the kiss and then started nibbling on my neck. His hand found the seem of my dress and he slid his hand up my thigh. When my skirt was pushed up to my hips exposing my sex to him, he leaned me back. I watched him look at my core and lick his lips like a man starved.
"Wait a second. Before you start, what was going on with your chili? Did you throw the bet?"
"No, not at all." He looked at me confused. "I don't know what happened, I've made this a bunch of times and its always been good. This was terrible."
"Did you do anything different?"
"Well. I was out of tomato paste, so I used ketchup. A buddy of mine suggested it."
"Oh my god, Sy. No wonder! Thank god you are pretty, my guy." I tease.
"Your guy? I like the way that sounds. Now lean back, Princess. I'm going to try to convince you to let me not shave."
#henry cavill fanfic#my apologies to henry cavill#henry cavill#henry cavill smut#asks answered#captain syverson#captain sy x reader
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Dumbo | Jungkook (M)
→ summary: you know what they say about boys with big noses...
{or alternatively: jungkook has a big dick but he doesn’t know how to use it, but luckily you’re there to help.}
→ genre: humor/crack, smut
→ warnings: they talk about dicks a lot (i.e. jungkook has a big dick), DICK MEASURING CONTESTS (aka jk gets his dick appraised... just boys bein’ boys), explicit sexual content, semi-public exhibitionism, handjobs, blowjobs, sub!jungkook, whining, light dirty talk, mild pain play, mutual masturbation, jungkook has piercings, accidental edging (you’ll... understand), oc doesn’t have a gag reflex lol
→ words: 17.2K
→ a/n: @jincherie... you are my enabler and i will die on this hill only if you die on it with me. but of course i know you will die with me. because we only have one braincell and if either of us die, we both do. thank you for commissioning me to write this btw... even though i was already writing this so you just basically sent me money for free. ANYWAY... WORLD IS FUCK BUT I LOVE RHA!! ALSO JUNGKOOK HAS A BIG DICK!! EPIC!!
The club lights make it difficult for Jungkook to see anything. He doesn’t understand why club owners can’t just jack up the lighting for once; it isn’t like you’re going to be able to find a hook-up through echolocation or something. Though, judging by the way people seem to be groping their way through the masses, perhaps there really is no need for illumination anyway.
Jungkook normally hates this kind of scene. Drinking is all good and fun, especially when he’s with his hyungs, but going to overly crowded places makes his skin crawl with anxiety. It takes almost three shots during pre-game for him to get anywhere near this kind of place and it’s all thanks to Seokjin. That hyung thrives in these kinds of environments, like a clipped butterfly relearning how to fly.
“I’m gonna get shit fucked wasted!” Seokjin hollers, his arm looped carelessly around the only other person who hates being here as much as Jungkook does. He watches passively as Yoongi tries to bite a chunk off of Seokjin’s hand, but despite his inebriation, their eldest hyung is able to dodge it quickly.
“Not before I kill you, then everyone else in this place, and then myself, first.” Yoongi growls, nudging Seokjin off his smaller frame. If the world hadn’t been swaying underneath Jungkook’s feet, he might have offered to help his small hyung do the deed. If there’s anyone who hates nightclubs more than Jungkook, it’s Yoongi. Jungkook is frightened to know how Seokjin managed to convince Yoongi in the first place, and he’d prefer not to find out what sort of terrible blackmail the elder must have under his sleeve to accomplish such an arduous feat.
Just as Yoongi is about to connect his steel-toed boot up Seokjin’s freshly bleached asshole, Jimin returns from the bar with three glasses held precariously in each of his fists. Jungkook wonders yet again how this is possible due to the sheer tininess of Jimin’s hands, but then again... What can’t Jimin do when it comes to alcohol?
“I’m back! Here you go, Jungkookie,” Jimin says, seamlessly handing Jungkook a glass of what he hopes is just a regular beer like he asked. Knowing Jimin, he probably ordered the strongest shit they have. He peers at it suspiciously, but it only takes half a sip for Jungkook to confirm his guess. He grimaces, nearly coughing out a lung at the strength of the poison running down his throat.
“That tasted like fucking metal polish! What the fuck, Jimin?”
“I know! It’s great isn’t it?” Jimin smiles angelically, handing Yoongi one of the drinks. Yoongi looks at the swirling piss-yellow liquid as if it holds the secrets to the universe. It appears as if he’s decided something when his eyes light up.
“Oh my god, this drink is gonna kill me,” he says, not an ounce of fear in his voice. Jimin nods, not even trying to hide his deception.
“I promised the bartender a blowie if he could give me the strongest shit they had,” Jimin shrugs. “Dude literally went to the back room and took out this bottle that looked like it came from Napoleon’s secret stash of hooker piss.” He sniffs the drinks thoughtfully. “Yea, I could believe that.”
“I hate this!” Jungkook cries at no one in particular.
“Tough shit! We’re in this together!” Yoongi groans, downing the entire contents of his drink in one go before promptly being swallowed whole by the crowd. Seokjin hoots, hastily waving goodbye to Jungkook and Jimin before following Yoongi and diving into the sweaty masses like a seasoned Olympian.
“I hope they don’t die like last time,” Jungkook sighs, forcing himself to take a big gulp of his drink. It sears against his throat like a brand, which probably has an inscription saying “Jeon Jungkook has bad taste in friends.”
Jimin shrugs his shoulders. “Well, like Namjoon said a while ago, we’re gonna meet by the bar in 2 hours to check if everyone is still alive and we’ll find out then. Okay, Kook?”
Jimin has reminded him of this for the umpteenth time, though he can’t blame him for being extra careful. Last time the whole gang went to the club, Hoseok had gotten stuck in an elevator at his hook-up’s place and had cried for 5 hours straight before one of them thought to look for him. The time before that, Taehyung had ingested two times his bodyweight of margaritas and he had found himself in Japan the next morning with an extra $500 in his pocket.
Yeah. They’re idiots, but at least they’re idiots who will try not to make the same mistakes as last time. Key word being “try.”
Jungkook looks around the club, but he can’t find any awkward looking lanky people anywhere. “Where is Namjoon-hyung, by the way? Haven’t seen him since we split up.”
“Who the hell knows?” Jimin laughs, the sound drowning out when the DJ suddenly decides to play a death metal version of Dance the Night Away by Twice. Jimin’s eyes light up. “Ooooh shit! This is my song! See ya later, Kook!”
“W-wait, those drinks! Aren’t they for the others––“
“Bitch, you think these are for them?” Jimin begins to double fist his alcohol with the thirstiness of a man in a desert, or a twink confronted with two dicks. Either or.
To Jungkook’s horror, the crowd has seemingly grown thrice in size since they’ve arrived and he watches as Jimin’s body is slowly getting consumed by the masses, though he doesn’t seem bothered in the slightest. He leans into a random guy's back, a look of bliss on his face. He salutes lazily at Jungkook. “Anyway. See you in 2 hours, Kook! Try to have fun!”
Try to have fun, his ass.
Unlike Jimin, Jungkook doesn’t particularly feel like being crushed by sweaty hormonal bodies; instead, he chooses to head to the bar. He surreptitiously dumps his drink into the trash, feeling kind of bad for discarding a free drink, but Jungkook doesn’t want to get shit-fucked wasted like the rest of them are. Perhaps he’ll be the designated driver today, even though his vision is still kind of swimming. Well, he could probably walk in a straight line if he used all his brainpower. Which isn’t a lot, but you know. People learn to make do.
It takes him a while to find an empty stool by the bar and he is unlucky enough to be squished between two couples who don’t seem to be aware that public indecency is a crime. He has to endure being jostled for five minutes straight until the bartender finally notices him and allow him to order his can of coke.
(“Sorry, kid. The banana milk is all sold out. Some girl ordered our entire stock for her friends a few hours ago.” And just like that, Jungkook wants to die all over again.)
He does not know for how long he sits by the bar. Well, that’s a blatant lie, because he knows that he’s been sitting there for 18 minutes and 34 seconds exactly. He’s checked his phone religiously every 2 minutes to see if 2 hours have passed already, just so he can ask one of his stupid friends to go home with him. Perhaps he could coerce Jimin into turning in early for once (which is a pipedream, not when the DJ seems adamant to play Jimin’s favorite Christina Aguilera song 70 times in a row.)
So in short, Jungkook is miserable. He could go home by himself, but also he doesn’t want to end up having to walk to the police station the next morning to bail his friends out after one of them inevitably destroys public property again.
Fuck. Maybe he shouldn’t have thrown away his other drink.
He’s so deep in his thoughts that he doesn’t notice that one of the couples beside him have already left and that another person has taken their spot. He is jarred from his musings when a well-manicured hand is placed delicately on his shoulder, urging him to swivel the barstool around to face his soon-to-be acquaintance.
“Hey,” you say, a sultry smile on your lips. Jungkook feels his mouth immediately fill with cotton as he stares at your beautiful face, the dingy lighting of the club doing nothing to suppress the wicked glint in your eyes.
“Uhh… hey?” Jungkook replies, as charming and verbose as ever. If it isn’t obvious enough, Jungkook is a little lacking in the girls department, or at least, when it comes to girls-who-are-blatantly-flirting with him department. He normally isn’t this socially inept around the opposite gender, but given the connotations of this circumstance, his overactive male brain can only be restrained so much before it starts wandering towards dangerous territory.
It doesn’t help that the neckline of your dress is bordering on obscene, and Jungkook is afraid that if you move one more inch towards him, something very embarrassing might happen to the both of you (probably more so for him, if he’s being quite honest.)
“I couldn’t help but notice you from across the club and thought I should introduce myself,” you explain, gaze unashamedly trailing down his body. Jungkook can feel the heat from you radiating in waves, burning him from the inside out as he tries not to melt into a puddle in a pathetic attempt to get the fuck out of there.
“You saw me? But it’s… so dark in here…” Jungkook wants to fucking murder himself. That’s what he decides to say to you? God, no fucking wonder he’s a virgin. Good looks really aren’t everything when he doesn’t have a brain controlling the rest of his body. There might as well be a fucking hamster running laps inside of his skull for all he knew.
Thankfully (or unthankfully––God knows Jungkook’s stress levels aren’t lowering any time soon), you find his response funny enough to warrant a chuckle. You bat your eyes salaciously at him, which Jungkook didn’t even think was possible. People can be sexy? When they blink? Apparently, you can do that.
You shrug your shoulders. “That’s true. You caught me in a lie, I suppose. I actually knew you were coming even before you arrived.”
Jungkook chokes on his own spit then, nearly spraying you with his saliva like the dog that he is. His eyes bug out of his sockets, his body going tense with nerves. "You... you knew? What... What does that even mean?"
You point over your shoulder, gesturing vaguely at the crowd on the dance floor. "I'm friends with Seokjin over there. He mentioned you were coming with him to the club tonight so I decided to tag along."
"You know Seokjin-hyung?" The alarm bells in Jungkook's head start ringing wildly out of control. Nothing good ever comes out of being friends with Seokjin, especially since his presence alone has the power to make the creases in your brain to smoothen. Take it from someone who's been there, done that.
"Yep," you say, popping your 'p.' "I met him in my first-year English course, though I still don't know why a third-year like him was taking it in the first place."
"It's because he doesn't know how to read," Jungkook says plainly.
"I can tell. He uses voice-to-text exclusively and Siri can never spell Asian names correctly," you shrug your shoulders. "Either that, or he just doesn't know how to spell your name."
"Yea. I'm permanently John Jung Cock on his phone," Jungkook replies. He shakes his head. "Hold on, we were talking about something before this."
"Oh. About how I casually revealed to you that I was stalking you through our mutually insane friend?"
"Y-Yea, basically." Jungkook doesn't even understand what the fuck is happening right now. "I mean! Not exactly? Like, for all I know, you could've just asked hyung who he was coming with and he mentioned my name and––"
"Listen, kid. I straight up just told you I'm stalking you. Let's skip the foreplay and get to the meat of it: I'm literally following you," you say, without an inch of regret, embarrassment, or morality in your tone of voice.
Jungkook, who despite being filled with so much fear and tension enough to kill the small hamster inside his brain, is somehow able to keep his calm in front of the psychopath in front of him. Either that, or he's already in the middle of a stroke and he's lost all his fine motor skills.
"I... I don't know what to say."
"You don't need to say anything, baby," you murmur, leaning even closer to him until your chest was practically pressed against his. The thin layer of your dress and his well-worn cotton tee does nothing to help the situation (both in general and the one in his pants). He can feel your every curve, can smell the sweet perfume you're wearing; you were enveloping his senses. If he tried hard enough, he could probably count your eyelashes if he so desired with how close you were.
He knows he should probably be running away in terror right now, but he finds himself stuck resolutely to the barstool, unable to move. Maybe Jimin was right... Maybe he did have a fear kink or something.
("Isn't that just called masochism?" Jungkook asks, brows raised.
Jimin only laughs, patting him on the back condescendingly. "Nah, dude. You just straight up wanna die by the hands of a hot person, and I can respect that homie. We all have been there.")
“W-what do you want from me?” Jungkook asks, sweat lining his brow. You’re still looking at him like he was a meal, but he finds he probably doesn’t mind being devoured by you.
Your wicked grin returns, full force. “I just want to play, Jungkook. But why don’t we discuss this… somewhere more private?”
Thunk. Was that the sound of his heart dropping out of his ass, or his brain pressing against the left side of his skull, or his dick hitting the roof? Jungkook isn’t sure, but he does know he wants to see where this night will take him.
He lets you lead the way, squeezing through sweaty bodies and elbowing a stray hand or two. Jungkook swears he feels a guy grope him on the way out, but before he can even sock the guy in the jaw, you’re already one step ahead of him. You hiss menacingly at the dudebro, raising your long acrylic nails in a show of dominance like you’re from some wildlife documentary. The guy audibly whines, running away from the two of you with his tail between his legs.
Jungkook stares at you incredulously. “How the fuck did you––”
“I’ve gone to tango classes with that dude. I have his mom’s phone number,” you explain nonchalantly. Instantly, Jungkook feels himself hardening in his pants.
You manage to get to where the washroom stalls are. You brazenly walk past the line of girls at the women’s section, but Jungkook is even more confused when you also pass by the men’s section. You turn the corner, where a bunch of tables and chairs were being kept. Then, you begin to knock down some of the extra chairs stacked against the wall, which is where Jungkook discovers there is an unused wheelchair accessible washroom.
“Why is this washroom being kept hidden?” he wonders aloud, sneaking guilty looks over his shoulder. No one seems to have noticed that the two of you are blatantly trespassing property, but you don’t look all that stressed about it.
You look at him weirdly. “Dude. You can barely walk in this club without getting groped, poked, or doped. As much as I’m all for accessibility, I don’t think wheelchair-bound people are gonna have much of a good time here.”
Jungkook feels as though he should be saying something profound about the need for establishments to be accessible or something, but the strain in his pants really wasn’t doing many wonders on his verbosity right now. Maybe next time.
You make quick work of the barricade and you get the door open in no time. You push him hastily inside, making him yelp as he tries to find his way around the darkened room. You flip the switch on somewhere behind him, illuminating the washroom to find… a toilet. That’s it.
“Well, they certainly didn’t think about interior decorating,” Jungkook says, laughing nervously as you click the door locked. He turns, watching as you pull the black elastic that was on your wrist and begin to tie your hair. You smile cheekily at him, the implications of what is about to happen very much apparent.
“Nah, they didn’t. But the room gets the job done and that’s all we want, don’t we?” You purr, taking the two short steps you need to get close to him once more. You trail a well-manicured nail down his chest, circling around his nipple teasingly but not doing anything more. His breathing turns more shallow, and he knows for sure that his eyes must look crazed to you right now.
You bring your finger lower and lower, grazing the top of his belt buckle and staying there. You look up at him, licking your lips as your gaze trails down to his own. Once again, he feels paralyzed as you take him in and he wishes for all the horny gods from above that you would finally end the torture and finally close the distance.
Taking some pity on him, you rest your lips against his throat, suckling gently enough that Jungkook knows it won’t leave a mark. His hands instantly come up to grab your waist, as if urging you to go harder, to make it hurt.
You smirk against his skin, deciding at that moment to bite down, hard. Jungkook yelps, before the sound morphs into an unabashed moan. His cheeks pinken, embarrassed at the volume of his voice.
“I-I…”
“Don’t worry, Jungkook…” you whisper, soothing the bite with your tongue. You pop off his skin, your lips slightly redder than before. “I’ll take good care of you, darling.”
See, Jungkook doesn’t doubt you in the slightest. As for his own skills at taking care of you when the time comes… now that’s a little bit of a gamble.
Jungkook isn’t a virgin, per se… He lost his virginity during his last year of high school to some girl he met at a party, and suffice to say, he didn’t last long. He’s had a few girlfriends in the past, but none of them ever wanted to get with him once they saw his dick. You see, he had a bit of a problem…
He wasn’t small, by the way. Don’t get him wrong. In fact, he was kinda––
Jungkook is pulled away from his thoughts when you suddenly drop down to your knees, your hands grabbing onto his thighs for support. He’s almost worried that you’d injured yourself from how fast you’d dropped, but you don’t seem all that bothered by how deftly your fingers moved to unbuckle his belt.
When you get it loosened, your hands stop by the button of his jeans and you look up at him with expectation. Jungkook almost whines when your hands drift back to your lap.
You snort, amused. “What? You think I’m gonna do all the work here, buddy? Come on, strip for me.” you say, sitting on your haunches as you wait for him to move.
The strain in his pants was getting downright painful at this point, so Jungkook is more than eager to follow your orders. Still, his hands are shaking the entire time, so it takes him a few extra seconds before he can finally unbutton his stupid jeans and pull down his stupid zipper. Even through his loose boxers, the outline of his dick is very apparent, with a small wet spot already staining the front of his boxers a darker blue.
“Uh, I have to say a disclaimer first though,” Jungkook squeaks, suddenly shy under the intense gaze you were pointing straight at his dick. It twitches slightly, and your eyes follow it like a cat ready to pounce. “I’m… kinda on the bigger side, so I just want to ask if you’re sure––”
“Baby, I was sure even before I came to this club,” you say, trance-like. Your fists clench and unclench by your sides. “Now, shut up before I change my mind.”
“But––” Jungkook doesn’t get to finish his sentence, stunned to silence when you quite literally rip his boxers off of him like a magician trying to prove something. His dick springs up half-way, still not fully hard as it’s always taken him a little bit more goading before he can get to full mast. Yea, he was that big.
You stare at it for a moment, going cross-eyed as you stared at his tip head-on like some sort of perverse gun barrel. You don’t move for so long that Jungkook is afraid that he might have freaked you out with the size of his cock, though you wouldn’t be the first in a long shot. He’s about to apologize, prepared to pull up his pants in shame and walk home with half a log in his crotch. He’s already shifting his jeans back up when you place a hand on his wrist, stopping him in his tracks.
“Wait. Are you, like, only half-hard right now?” you ask, voice quiet.
Jungkook flushes. “Y-yeah… It gets a little bit bigger when I’m fully… You know…” he says, trailing off.
You’re still looking at his dick, but after further assessment, Jungkook realizes that you don’t look horrified in the slightest. In fact, you look pleased. “Jesus fuck you’re huge! Like… almost abnormally so.”
Jungkook literally feels like he’s going to die (and he hates that it’s kinda making him even hornier). “I guess so?”
“That’s a fucking log! You could stand on that thing!”
“I don’t think that’s possible, but––”
“Seokjin had told me you were huge, but I didn’t believe him because, well, the way he described it was that you had a literal third leg hiding under there. Who would have thought that Seokjin isn’t full of shit after all,” you say, awestruck.
“I’m really not that big––wait, Seokjin has talked to you about my dick? What the fuck? Since WHEN?” Seokjin was just out there in the world? Telling strangers about his dick? That hyung is seriously getting smashed WWE style the next time he sees him, and it’s NOT going to be sexy.
You wave him off. “Oh, don’t worry. He doesn’t just tell anyone. He let it slip because he was defending your honor,” you shrug.
In the midst of Jungkook’s mental breakdown at the realization that one of his closest friends just told a random girl that he’s got a meter long King Kong dong, he doesn’t notice that you’ve already stood up from where you were kneeling. You pull down the toilet seat cover, seating yourself on it and rubbing your reddened knees with a pout. “Ouch. Damn, I’m not used to kneeling for men anymore. Sorry, where was I? Oh right!”
You snap your fingers together, smiling gleefully at Jungkook. “So! I dragged you in here to give you my proposition, you see. I have a deal to make with you.”
Jungkook looks down at his cock, which was still red and dripping pre-cum, before turning back to you. “And this has something to do with… my dick?”
“Precisely!” you cheer, glad that he seems to be on the same page as you when he was in fact, not. “Sorry about tricking you, by the way. I’ll suck your dick after this if you’re still game, but only if you agree with my plan.”
“Your plan?”
“Yep,” you say, popping your ‘p’ once more. “You see, I have an ex-boyfriend. His name is Lee Taeyong, ever heard of him?”
Jungkook vaguely knows the upperclassman, though he can’t say he’s ever spoken to him. “Kinda. What does he have to do with me?”
“Well, if you really heard of him, then you’d already be one step ahead. Seeing as how it’s not already connecting for you––” you point to his dick, poking the sensitive head with the grace of a 5-year old at a petting zoo, “––then you don’t know that Lee Taeyong has the biggest dick on campus. Allegedly.”
“Allegedly,” Jungkook repeats. He still doesn’t follow.
“Well, I wouldn’t know either because I’ve never seen his dick, so––”
“Wait wait wait. Wait.” Jungkook’s hamster brain is running a mile a minute. There have been way too many absurdities spoken in the last five minutes and he doesn’t think he’s drunk enough to deal with your insanity right now. “Let’s dissect this one at a time, shall we? First of all, how can you not know how big your boyfriend’s dick is?”
“My ex-boyfriend. And we only dated for like three days, and I don’t fuck until a week has passed, okay? I don’t play like that,” you say as if you didn’t just lure Jungkook to this dingy washroom only to give him blue balls and trauma.
“Okay, whatever. So what if he has a big dick? What does that have to do with me?”
You roll your eyes. “How can you not understand yet? I’m on the hunt for our university’s biggest dick, of course! And you, Jungkook, might just be my ticket to the number one prize.”
There is a long pause. Jungkook stares and stares at you, waiting for you to shout “Surprise! You’re being pranked, bro!” and for all the cameramen to come out and shower him in confetti and dollar bills or something. But no, nothing like that happened. He just continues to stand there with his dick out, while you sit on a dingy toilet seat with your legs crossed comfortably as if you were just two friends having a regular conversation.
After a while, Jungkook comes to a conclusion. “You’re being serious.”
You snort, annoyed as if you were the one being inconvenienced. “Of course I am, dude. I don’t stalk just about anybody to see their dick. I’m not that insane.”
Jungkook feels as though your judgment on sanity should probably be taken with a grain of salt. “S-sure. Right. You’re definitely not insane.”
“And you have a big dick! I’m glad you can see where I’m coming from,” you say, nodding sagely. You peer at his dick once more, brows furrowed as you think deeply to yourself. “Hmm… Yea, I’d say you’d be at least equally as big as him. If all else fails, I can split the winnings and get half the amount of money if you––”
“No,” Jungkook says.
You raise your brow. “Yes?” you try.
“Yes–I mean, what? No!” Jungkook repeats, shaking his head furiously. "Are you even hearing yourself? You expect me to get into a dick measuring contest with your ex just so you can, what? Get revenge on him or something?"
"Not for revenge." You lean closer to him, face inches away from his dick but you don't seem perturbed in the slightest. "It's for money," you whisper, grinning slyly.
"Money," Jungkook repeats.
You clap your hands excitedly. "Exactly! So Taeyong and I didn't actually break up on bad terms. We only got together to make Doyoung, his crush, jealous enough to confess his feelings. But now, that dumb bitch thinks that now that he's with Taeyong, he can make fun of me for not being able to handle Taeyong's dark horse cock––"
"Can you please stop talking like an insane person," Jungkook pleads. His comment remains unheard.
"––so we made a bet that Taeyong doesn't actually have the biggest dick on campus and that I'm dating a guy with an even bigger meat thermometer than he does," you finish, snapping your fingers with a flourish. There's a twinkle in your eye: it's misplaced excitement coupled with extreme insanity, Jungkook realizes.
"That's good and all, but there's just one problem."
"What?" You tilt your head, confused.
"We're not exactly dating, are we?"
"Details, details... What Doyoung and Taeyong don't know won't hurt them," you say, shrugging your shoulders.
Jungkook rolls his eyes. "Of course," he says, leaning against the grimy bathroom wall. He goes to tuck Jungkook Jr. back into his pants, his dick finally softening after the last ten minutes of psychological torture courtesy of yours truly, but you're quick to slap his hand away, making him yelp in surprise.
"No! I like looking at it," you say. You stare at his dick with rapt fascination. "It's kinda like looking at a weird, deformed baby leg. Beautiful, but haunting all at once."
Jungkook huffs, staring at you in equal parts disbelief and awe. If he thought Seokjin was mentally unhinged, then you're definitely on your way towards uncharted psychotic territory. It was kind of amazing how you could just say shit without any brain to mouth filter, in your own twisted way. "Listen, lady. I don't even fucking know what your name is, but I am not helping you win some stupid bet and showing my dick to even more strangers than I have to, okay?"
You consider him, lips pursing slightly. "Why, do you have any other plans this weekend?"
Jungkook falters. "I... No, I don't––"
You shrug your shoulders, as if that's the end of that problem. "Then it's settled! I don't see why you can't just do this out of the goodness of your heart?"
"For the last time, I won't do it even if––"
"I'll split the prize with you? 50/50? That's $1000 for having a huge dick! Every incel's wet dream!"
Jungkook pauses in his rant, choking on his spit. His jaw drops comically, unsure if he heard you right. "Did you say one... grand?"
Hook, line, and sinker. You know you caught him the moment his eyes bugged out of their sockets. You smirk, crossing your arms triumphantly as you gaze upon his desperate and broke college ass (and dick). “So? Having second thoughts?"
Jungkook is quiet for a moment. He opens his mouth, then closes it. He tries to wrap his head around the number, unsure if he should be worried about how ready he is to drop his pants for money. Have I completely lost it? Am I that much of an idiot? he wonders, but then again… He’d be an even bigger idiot for letting free money go down the drain.
“Where is this money even coming from?” he asks, even though he knows his guard is already dropping quickly.
You wave your hand flippantly. “Oh, Doyoung is filthy rich. I imagine that $2000 is nothing to him,” you say, picking at a hangnail. “It’s not much money to me either, but my pride is mostly at stake here. If you want, you could take all the money as a prize, so long as you make that bitch eat his heart out.”
Jungkook feels his dick twitch and he knows that you notice. “Two… thousand…” He accidentally moans, gripping his thighs to prevent himself from nutting. “That’s…”
You tilt your head, arching a brow. “Not enough? I could put in an extra $500 if you’re really against this whole thing. To be fair, I wouldn’t wanna expose my coochie to a random person either––”
“Two thousand five hundred? Are you fucking insane?” Jungkook exclaims, voice cracking at the end. He clears his throat, but it still feels like his lungs are on fire.
“Okay, three grand it is but I’m not going any higher than that,” you huff, shaking your head. “Mr. Jeon, you really do drive a hard bargain, though I always notice that well-endowed men tend to think they deserve the universe, so I’m not surprised.” You chuckle to yourself, as if anything about this situation is worth laughing at. Jungkook feels like that one time he had inhaled an entire helium balloon in one breath when he was younger: kinda nauseous but also kinda euphoric. Is it bad that his dick is stirring awake right now? Hello?
You put your hand out, looking at him expectantly. “Well? Do we have a deal or not?”
Jungkook takes a deep breath and accesses his options carefully. Does he:
Give up his low self-esteem for money and enter an actual dick-measuring contest with some stranger;
There is no other option. Jungkook wants money.
He exhales, a migraine already throbbing incessantly in the back of his skull. He thrusts his hand forward, gripping yours harshly in a firm handshake. “I’m in,” he says, without missing a beat. Your smile brings a shiver down his back, and he can’t help but wonder if this is what Judas felt like when he betrayed Jesus, except he’s betraying no one but his own self-worth.
Well, he always did wonder how much his life was worth and three grand doesn’t seem like that big of a stretch. Oh well.
“Nice,” you chuckle, seemingly vibrating from excitement. You slip behind him, grabbing his phone from the back pocket of his jeans (which were still, by the way, pooled around his thighs because his dick was still out. Just to remind you guys in case you forgot. OP doesn’t want you to ever forget about it.) You flick open his phone, cackling maniacally when you realize he doesn’t even have a password on.
Jungkook squawks. “Hey, what are you––”
“I’m saving my number on your phone,” you explain. He can barely see what you were typing into his phone contacts, but he doesn’t miss the way you attach a heart emoji beside your name. You open his texts, sending yourself an octopus emoji that just so happened to be Jungkook’s most frequently used emoji. You snort. “Octopus emoji, huh? Seems appropriate… Can’t help but think it was a sign that this might have been destiny.”
“I just like takoyaki…” Jungkook defends himself sulkily.
“Yea? Well I like cock,” you say. You pause, furrowing your brows. “Oh, I meant to say chicken. Same thing.”
You hand back his phone, grabbing your small purse that you had thrown aside onto the washroom floor. You straighten your dress, looking to all the world as if you hadn’t just offered a stranger three grand to show his dick. “Well, it was nice meeting you, Jungkook. I expect to see you soon, maybe this weekend if you’re free. I’ll text you the details of when we’ll meet next. Toodles!” you wave, sending him a flying kiss for extra measure. Jungkook’s eye twitches, and he wonders not for the first time tonight if he was trapped in a coma and was slowly passing away.
Just as you are about to head out the door, you stop in your tracks, turning back to face him. You give him a curious expression, gaze dragging downwards until you were staring down the barrel of his dick once more. “Hey, sorry about leaving you hanging like that, by the way. I would love to help you finish, but I have a ride to catch. Raincheck?”
Not waiting for an answer, you saunter away with a spring in your step. The door swings back closed, leaving Jungkook alone for the first time in what feels like forever: just him, his dick, and the promise of three thousand dollars on the horizon.
“I’m so fucking stupid,” Jungkook groans, sliding down to the floor. He fists his cock in his hand, groaning loudly when he feels the pleasure jolt up his spine like electricity. As he listens to the sounds of his heavy breathing and the slick mess in his hands, he can’t help but wonder if Jimin was right… Maybe he did have a thing for insane hot girls who were out to kill him.
x x x x x
After Jungkook cleans himself up, he marches out of the washroom with as much dignity as he can muster. Which is to say that he walked out of there with his head bowed in shame, meekly navigating the crowded club in search of his friends.
It isn’t hard, considering that Jimin was currently hanging on the fucking ceiling from a disco ball. A group of men stand at the bottom, all of them eagerly eyeing his fat ass as Jimin dangerously humped the shiny ball of metal like his life depended on it.
“Okaaaay guys! The moment this disco ball drops, whoever catches me first gets to fuck me tonight so try your best to grab me~!” Jimin singsongs from his perch, howling madly as all the horny motherfuckers scramble all over each other, desperate to catch him lest he meets his maker.
“I. Hate. My. Life.” Jungkook sighs, striding past the group of men easily with his superior upper body strength. “Move, incels. This twink isn’t letting any of you simps touch his ass. He just likes the attention.”
“Aww, Jungkookie! Don’t ruin my fun~! Unless you wanna catch me and we can finally fu––” Jimin screams mid-sentence, just as the cord holding him and the disco ball snaps. All the guys step over themselves to catch him, but Jungkook is stronger and faster. He catches Jimin mid-air, snatching him in an instant and hoisting him over his shoulder. Everyone cheers and hollers, clapping for him as Jimin continues to giggle hysterically into his back.
“Yay! Jungkookie is gonna fuck meeeee,” Jimin pats him on the ass, but Jungkook ignores him. He goes around the club, searching for the rest of his friends until he has five dangling bodies hanging off his body like some six-headed freak.
Well, it’s soon going to be five-headed after he beheads Seokjin, whom Jungkook is certain just vomited all over the back of his jeans.
“I can’t fucking find Yoongi-hyung.” Jungkook grits his teeth, his nose assaulted by the stench of Namjoon’s armpit as the elder contorts himself into a more comfortable position. “Stop fucking moving, you long-legged bastard. Why’d you have to be born with such good body proportions?”
“And why are you so hot, Jungkook?” Taehyung swoons from somewhere underneath Hoseok, who seems to be either passed out or dead; Jungkook didn’t pause to check for a pulse.
“Pretty sure Yoongi went home,” Seokjin slurs, a second wave of nausea hitting him as he struggles to keep the alcohol inside of him a bit longer. “Ugh… Said he saw his roommate and they went home together.”
“God, it better be his fucking roommate and not another person trying to sell his organs again.” Jungkook sighs. “Either way, we’re all going home. We’ve done enough damage for tonight.”
“Jungkookie, did you have any fun at all tonight? Didn’t see you around,” Namjoon quips, managing to wriggle out of Jungkook’s grip and fall face flat on the curb. He whines pathetically, not making a move to stand up again. “Ugh. I didn’t even drink a lot tonight so why...?”
“It’s because you’re Namjoon,” Jungkook supplies helpfully. He lets the rest of his friends down, making sure they are leaning against the wall for support (or sitting against the wall in Hoseok’s case). “Alright, I’m calling cabs. Seokjin-hyung, I’m staying over at your place tonight.”
Jimin, who was already slowly falling asleep where he stands, perks up in attention at that. “Wait, you’re coming home with me and Seokjin? Are we reaaaally gonna fuck?” Jimin tries to wiggle his eyebrows suggestively, but to Jungkook, it just looks like he’s having a stroke.
“I’m done nutting for tonight. We are sleeping once we get home and that’s it,” Jungkook snorts, crossing his arms.
“OOOOOOOH? JUNGKOOK GOT FUCKED AT THE CLUB!”
“GET IT BOY!”
“OH SHIT HE FINALLY USED HIS PURPLE-HEADED YOGURT FINGER!”
“DAMN DUDE? DAMN? DAMN?”
“AW, YOU FUCKED SOMEONE WITHOUT ME?”
Jungkook swears he had heard Hoseok speak amidst the yelling from his friends, but his hyung still remains mysteriously hunched over and dead to the world. “None of your businesses. Anyway, a cab is coming soon and I swear to God, if any of you piss or vomit in that poor man’s vehicle, I will make sure none of you live to see the light of day, okay?”
Jimin turns to Taehyung, who just happened to be beside him. “Not gonna lie, but I kinda jizzed in my pants just now. That was kinda hot.” Taehyung only nods in agreement.
An hour and thirty minutes later, Jungkook manages to get the last of his idiot friends home, leaving only him, Seokjin, and Jimin as they tiredly trudge up the steps to the apartment. It takes an additional twenty minutes for Seokjin to figure out where he’d left his keys, only for Jimin to raise his finger for them to wait as he hid behind some bushes while unbuckling his jeans. When he comes out of the bushes, pantless, he has a key raised with a victorious smirk on his face.
“Don’t ask where I keep this,” is all he says and Jungkook is glad that he had rejected Seokjin’s offer to permanently move in as their roommate.
They all stumble into the apartment, with Seokjin falling immediately onto the couch. He curls up into a little ball, snoring the moment his eyes shut. Jungkook wants to shake him awake, eager to interrogate him about what happened between you and him just a few hours ago at the club. Even if he wanted to wake him up, Jungkook is sure nothing can rouse the elder; this fact is confirmed when Jungkook dumps water on him, only for Seokjin to keep sleeping soundly like a baby.
“Well, hyung is dead. Guess it’s time for me to die too,” Jimin says sleepily, the horniness and insanity from the club already wearing off. He pats Jungkook gently on the head, pointing towards Seokjin’s room. “Sleep there. I’ll hand you an extra blanket because I wouldn’t trust that hyung’s sheets. Let’s sleep, yeah?”
Left with no other choice, Jungkook heads to Seokjin’s bedroom, jumping onto the unmade sheets and pretending not to notice the crusty unknown substance on the corner of the bed. He can’t fall asleep, not when he’s left haunted by the weight on his chest (and dick). Jungkook fiddles with his phone, staring wide-eyed at the name displayed tauntingly on his screen.
Y/N L/N.
He was gonna have a nightmare tonight, that’s for sure.
x x x x x
Jungkook wakes up early, much to his chagrin. He’d really like to stay dead to the world for much longer, but the smell of coffee brewing and bacon cooking is kind of a hard deal to pass up. Jungkook shifts in bed, cringing when he realizes he went to sleep in his jeans, and more importantly, that his pants felt a lot stickier than he remembered.
He lifts the blanket up, confirming his suspicions. “Fuck!”
Well, guess he didn’t have much of a nightmare last night after all.
He shucks off his clothes, disgusted by the mess he finds in his underwear. He hobbles over to Seokjin’s closet, cringing when he finds only one (1) clean pair of shorts left, which just so happened to have “PEE IS STORED IN THE BALLS” stamped on the back in cursive font. Beggars can’t be choosers, he supposes.
Jungkook tiptoes out of the bedroom, confronted with the sight of Jimin pouring three mugs of coffee and Seokjin still slumped over the couch, a substantial amount of drool dripping down from the side of his mouth and forming a puddle on the floor. Jungkook takes a photo, saving it for later.
“Morning,” Jimin smiles from the kitchen, offering Jungkook one of the cups. Jungkook is certain that Jimin has no recollection of the events from last night, though such is Park Jimin’s way of life. He drinks to get fucked up, then he forgets, and then the cycle repeats itself anew. Jungkook wonders how Jimin always manages to wake up without a hangover, though God might have just given him a super liver in compensation for his lack of height.
“Hyung is still dead,” Jungkook states plainly, walking over to Seokjin and peering at him closely. Jungkook sticks a finger into his agape mouth, collects some of his spit, and then proceeds to give him the wettest willy of his life. Still no response.
“Let me try,” Jimin says, sauntering over to Seokjin with one of the cups of coffee. Jimin leans down, hums gently into his ear. “Hyung, wake up. We have coffee for you!”
Seokjin mumbles incomprehensibly in his sleep, snuggling deeper into the couch stuffing. Jimin tilts his head, still smiling. Then, he dumps the scalding cup of coffee all over Seokjin’s crotch.
In an instant, Seokjin screams with the pitch of a banshee, swinging his arms wildly about and nearly knocking himself out with his own fist. Jungkook and Jimin watch passively from the sidelines, waiting for the elder to finish fanning his nutsack before greeting him a pleasant morning.
“WHY ARE YOU BOTH LITERAL DEMONS?” Seokjin hollers, jumping to his feet with his scorched balls and all. Taking pity on him, Jungkook walks over to the fridge, tossing his hyung a bag of ice. And by toss, it’s more like he pitches the bag straight into his dick with the ease and speed of a seasoned baseball player, eliciting another round of pained howls.
“YOU––ASS––” Seokjin seethes, clutching the bag of ice to his nether regions. He sits down on the adjacent loveseat, expression contorting as he cups his balls gingerly. “God, it’s almost like you guys don’t think I deserve basic human decency.”
“That was just a small part of my revenge for you, after you gave my contact details to an insane woman,” Jungkook sneers, miming a punch onto Seokjin’s handsome face. Seokjin doesn’t even flinch, too busy staring at Jungkook’s legs.
“Hey, are you wearing my thot shorts?”
Jungkook looks down at the neon pink monstrosity around his hips. “You call these your thot shorts?”
Seokjin shrugs. “I got dicked down in them once. You should try.”
“Oh, did I hear something about revenge? I smell tea in here,” Jimin says, coming back from the kitchen with his own cup. “Well, I have coffee but same shit. What happened?”
“This––” Jungkook points an accusatory finger at Seokjin, “––asshole sent my location information to an insane stalker lady last night after he told her that I had a huge dick!”
Seokjin squints at him, confused. “What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about Y/N! She said you told her about how big my dick was and when she asked you where I was, you told her I was going to the club with you last night!”
“Oh.” Realization dawns on Seokjin’s face, which was quickly replaced by incredulity as he stares at Jungkook. “I assumed she asked for your contact details because she had a crush on you. I was just trying to get you some pussy, bro.”
“Yeah, Kook. Not gonna lie, but I’d be dicking down girls left and right if I had a dick as big as yours,” Jimin says, eyeing the bulge in his teeny tiny shorts with interest. “In fact, I’d probably be a top if I had a dick as big as yours.”
Seokjin laughs, nearly shooting out phlegm from the strength of it. “Oh god, don’t tell me. You couldn’t get your dick hard again? Don’t worry bro, if I had a dick as big as yours, it’d take ages for it to fill up too.”
Jungkook flushes, stomping his foot in embarrassment. “That! Wasn’t the problem! The problem is––”
“––that Jungkook nuts too quickly because he doesn’t have any practice,” Jimin tuts sadly, patting the younger with a pitiful expression. “Don’t worry, Kook. Hyung is open to giving you some pointers.”
“That’s not it either!” Jungkook screams, groaning in annoyance. “She came up to me because she offered to pay me $3000 to enter a dick-measuring contest!”
Jimin and Seokjin tilt their heads in tandem, still not getting it. “So?” they both chorus, giving him a blank-eyed stare.
“Are you guys out of your mind? I got bribed into showing my dick to some strangers like some kind of weird prostitute!”
“It’s not prostitution if you’re not engaging in sexual activity,” Jimin muses, taking a long sip from his coffee. He shrugs his shoulders. “Honestly, I don’t see how this is a problem. You show some girls your dick, and you get money. Dudes would kill to be in your position.”
“Oh my God, don’t tell me,” Seokjin leers at Jungkook, and the younger almost can’t stop himself from landing another blow against the elder’s abused crotch. “You got roped into some bukkake orgy and now you’re asking your hyungs to help you? Don’t worry, Jungoo… You came to the right people. You see, Jimin and I have some experience with––”
“LALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU!” Jungkook jams his fingers into his own ears, screaming hysterically to drown out the sounds of Seokjin and Jimin’s combined laughter. Jungkook pouts at them, glowering pathetically. “Seriously, hyungs! Do you not see how fucked up this is? Who follows a stranger to a club, pretends they’re going to give you a blowjob, only to offer 3K for you to show some strangers your dick?”
“A regular Friday night if you ask me,” Jimin says, shrugging once more. Jungkook stares at him, realizing that maybe it was the wrong idea being friends with these two lunatics in the first place. Knowing Jimin, he’d probably been in much more lewd and compromising situations than Jungkook will ever have. Rumor has it that Jimin had once done a keg stand while having his dick sucked while on vacation in Japan.
“Well, if you were really against it, then you could have just said no?” Seokjin points out, wagging a finger at him. “I know Y/N, and yeah she’s kind of demented, but she still knows that no means no. Surely, you haven’t considered the fact that you are 1) a pushover and 2) horny for her?”
“Well, yea––No, what––No!” Jungkook splutters, stammering wildly. His two hyungs grin salaciously, gazing at him knowingly. Jungkook can only groan, as he knows that they kind of have a point. He’s always been too weak for girls and money, so when you put those two things together…
“I might be addicted to the BBC tag on Pornhub, but you my friend… You’re in it for the BBCC,” Jimin snickers, patting Jungkook comfortingly on the back. Jungkook groans into his hands, slumping onto the loveseat beside Seokjin, whose icepack had long since melted and caused the seat to be uncomfortably damp.
“BBCC? I’m almost too afraid to ask.”
“Big black credit card,” Seokjin pipes up, wrapping his own arm around Jungkook’s shoulder. “Don’t worry, bud. We all have been there.”
That’s the problem: somehow, Jungkook finds himself much too ready to accept his fate, eagerly awaiting when you’ll text him next.
x x x x x
After a much-needed shower at Jimin and Seokjin’s place, Jungkook tiredly makes his way to the nearby bus stop, ready to go home and sleep the entire weekend away. Screw his Biochemistry midterm on Monday––if he really is going to whore himself out to you, then he’s going to need all the self-care and therapy that he can get. His phone itches in the pocket of his shorts (yes, he’s still wearing the thot shorts), and he wonders if he should text his therapist and ask for an extra appointment later in the day.
Just as he’s about to pull out his phone, he senses it vibrate once, twice. He freezes in his steps, walking out of the way of busy pedestrians on the sidewalk and into a random clothing store. He sees the lone cashier staring at him from the corner of his eye, but he does not check if her gaze is filled with disgust or disgust. Probably disgust, he surmises.
Flicking his phone on, he sees two new messages from you and his heart immediately starts to hammer in his chest. No one has ever made Jungkook equal parts scared and excited, though he imagines you might have that effect on most people, what with how you look like the type to tie up unsuspecting victims to harvest their organs in your summer cottage up in the mountains or something. Or maybe that’s just Jungkook projecting.
from: y/n l/n ❣️
hey! sorry for taking so long to text you. my roommate tried to make cheesecake at 3am last night and i had to supervise in case he burned down the apartment.
from: y/n l/n ❣️
anyway, i was wondering if you were free later? some time after 5 maybe? let me know!
You already want to meet so soon. Jungkook exhales heavily through his nostrils, pinching the bridge of his nose in an attempt to calm himself. Alright, this is fine. Jungkook is a big boy: he can handle going to a girl’s home without losing his mind. You didn’t say anything about this being the actual dick-measuring contest yet, so he can only assume this is just you asking for something else. Maybe to talk more? Maybe he’ll get a down payment for the prize money? Maybe you’ll follow through on your raincheck? God, is it wrong for him to have his dick plumping up in his shorts when you haven’t even done anything to him yet?
(On the contrary, you could say that you have done a lot for him over the past twenty four hours, though maybe not in the way most people would expect.)
from: jjk
yeah i can meet you at 5. what’s this for?
from: y/n l/n ❣️
oh, nothing! i just wanted to talk to you about the actual competition and stuff. plus, i want to actually measure your dick, just so i can see how much you’re actually packing down there ;)
from: jjk
….yeah, fine. whatever.
(This really isn’t a “whatever” type of situation, but honestly, Jungkook doesn’t really know what to say anymore. He’s officially lost his singular brain wrinkle. He’s smooth brain McGee over here.)
You follow up by sharing your location with him, and he’s surprised to find that you aren’t that far away from where Jungkook was right now. He really did mean to go back to his apartment first and get changed into something more… morally acceptable, but since he hasn’t been arrested yet for public decency, he should be okay with going to your place in Seokjin’s thot shorts.
There’s something invigorating about going to your place, dressed the way he is… Maybe the shorts are somehow giving him brain hemorrhage by indirect association with Seokjin. Either that or Jungkook simply loves torturing himself by embarrassing himself constantly. Well, at least he showered and combed his hair before leaving his hyungs’ place.
He inputs your address into his phone map, taking his sweet time as he walks the short distance to your apartment. As he passes by the buildings and street corners, he can’t help but think that he might have been around this area before. He tries to rack his brain, forcing himself to remember why this route seems so familiar.
“Oh right. Yoongi-hyung’s new apartment should be around here,” he muses to himself. He wonders if his hyung had gotten home safely last night. He should probably text him to make sure, but he’s got a literal dick appointment to attend to first, so he’ll remember to check up on Yoongi once he finishes up with you.
Does that make him a shitty friend? Probably. But would Yoongi do the same if Jungkook was in his shoes? Probably.
Yeah, Jungkook and his group of friends aren’t exactly role models for a sensitive and loving relationship, though that’s not much of a surprise to anyone.
He arrives at a decent looking apartment complex, complete with its own little water fountain at the entrance. He walks through the automatic sliding doors, peers at the shiny caution tape barring him from using the elevator. He stares at your address on his phone, groaning loudly when he sees “1603” much to his annoyance.
“No wonder she had such great thighs,” Jungkook mutters angrily to himself, preparing himself for the long and arduous journey his glutes are going to endure.
Years later, Jungkook finds himself at your door, his lungs jumping out of his throat as he struggles to catch his breath. He hunches over, elbows digging into his thighs as he wipes the sweat trailing down his neck. He can see your door just near the end of the hall, but just as he’s about to crawl his way over––
“Oh. Oh my,” a familiar voice says from behind him, and Jungkook looks over his shoulder to see…
“Yoongi-hyung?” Jungkook exclaims incredulously, mouth gaping at the sight of his thought-to-be-dead hyung coming out of the elevator. He splutters for a few more moments before pointing an accusing finger at Yoongi. “You used the elevator?”
Yoongi raises an eyebrow, turning to look at the elevator with a thoughtful look. “Oh right. The elevator works. The maintenance people just forgot to remove the safety tape from last week.” Yoongi looks back at Jungkook, gaze lowering to his legs. “I see that Seokjin has provided you with his thot shorts.”
Jungkook doesn’t even try to cover himself, used to his friends seeing him in varying degrees of undress. Like, what was Yoongi going to do? Take a photo of him and post it to his Twitter for his thousands of followers to see? He wasn’t that cruel...
Snap! Yoongi pockets his phone quickly, clearing his throat. “So,” Yoongi walks up closer to him, peering at Jungkook curiously. “What brings you to my apartment? Not that I’m happy to see you, but I assumed you and the rest of our idiotic gang would have died of alcohol poisoning the night before.”
“...It’s a long story,” Jungkook says, rubbing the back of his neck. “Say... Where did you go last night, by the way? I tried to look for you, but Seokjin said your roommate brought you home?”
“Yeah. She went to the club with a bunch of her friends. She offered me a ride with her because she knew how much I hated it there,” Yoongi says, frowning. “Fuck you, by the way.”
“What the fuck? What the hell did I do?”
“I don’t know. You’re wearing Seokjin’s shorts and my ape brain told me to retaliate out of instinct,” he explains. He takes another long, good glance at his shorts. “Color me surprised that they fit you, by the way. I’d assume your huge ass would be making it rip the seams, or perhaps your dick would be saying hello.”
Jungkook pats his junk proudly. “I know, right? Big guy decided to cooperate, for some reason.”
“Will you guys stop yapping it up out in the hall? I’m pretty sure Mrs. Sy can hear you two idiots from the first floor,” a voice from behind Jungkook hisses, causing the two boys to jump up in surprise. Lo and behold, your head is peeking out from behind your door, a perfectly stenciled eyebrow arched in annoyance. “Well? Are you two coming in or what?” You return back to your apartment, assuming that they’d soon follow.
Yoongi looks at Jungkook. “Wait. You know Y/N?”
Jungkook looks at Yoongi. “Wait. You know Y/N?”
Yoongi squints his eyes. “She’s my roommate. She’s a mutual friend of––”
“––Seokjin,” Jungkook finishes. The two of them pause, a metaphorical light bulb glowing above their heads.
“Ah.”
“Ah.”
“I see. The demoness has roped you into some hare-brained scheme, hasn’t she?” Yoongi nods sagely, rubbing his beardless chin. “Can’t say I feel sorry for you since I have to live with the wench.”
Jungkook grimaces. “Man. She’s insane around you too?”
Yoongi shrugs, walking over to your shared apartment. “I’m dating Seokjin, remember? Everyday, I suffer. Everyday, I feel my arm.”
When Jungkook steps into your apartment, he can’t help but be a little surprised. Of course, he shouldn’t have expected to see a medieval torture chamber in the middle of a metropolitan city, but he wouldn’t put it past you to somehow make it happen. Instead, he finds a fairly cozy-looking home, with comfy couches and filled bookshelves, complete with a small balcony that had a few fresh herbs growing in little pots. It looks…
“Yoongi-hyung. You definitely decorated, didn’t you?” Jungkook snorts, fingering the little kitty-patterned throw blanket draped on your couch. It’s soft and expensive, and definitely something only Yoongi would buy. The elder doesn’t even bother looking embarrassed; he just throws Jungkook the middle finger as he walks towards the kitchen.
You come out once more from one of the connecting rooms at the other end of the apartment, presumably your bedroom. You motion for Jungkook to come in. “Yoongi, you’re gonna bake all day, right? Mind if you let Jungkook and I speak alone in my room?”
Yoongi waves his hand disinterestedly. “Whatever. If you guys are gonna be freaky in there, I’m gonna start playing clown music to drown you guys out, alright? And I mean the remix versions with the extra clown honks.”
You roll your eyes. “Yea, yea. We get it. Grandpa needs his special time alone too.”
Jungkook’s heart jumps when you don’t even bother correcting him. Does that mean you guys really were going to do something freaky? Hopefully, Yoongi has learned to differentiate screams of terror from screams of pleasure, though it’s hard to tell if he’d care otherwise.
He follows you into your room and immediately notices the perfectly made bed and the neatly organized desk. Your curtains are drawn close, but the sheerness of it allows the mid-afternoon sun to brighten the room regardless. Your bedroom smells faintly of vanilla and cinnamon, and he notices the small scented candle still smoking from when you’d put it out.
Nothing in the room indicates that he was inside the room of a psychopath, though maybe Namjoon or Taehyung would argue that anyone who makes their bed every day might be a little out of it. Jungkook continues to stand awkwardly by the door, unsure of what to do next except to stare.
You plop onto your bed, giving him an expectant look. “Well? Are you just gonna stand there by the door and have Yoongi see us measure your dick or what?” That gets Jungkook to move. He closes the door, pausing for a second before locking it for good measure. Then, he takes the short two steps that he needs to stand right in front of you.
You crane your neck, appraising him silently as he fidgets from the weirdness of it all. Your gaze trails down and Jungkook is not surprised when you stop to stare at his neon pink shorts. You snort, thumbing the edge of his shorts lightly. Jungkook shivers even though you’re barely touching him and he knows that you notice.
“Trying to get back at me for leaving you with blue balls yesterday?” you muse, letting go of the thin material. Jungkook wants to bring your hand back to his thigh, but he forces himself to keep still.
He looks down. “Not really? But I mean… Is it working?” He can’t help the hopeful lilt in his voice.
You laugh, patting him lightly on the thigh. “No worries, Jungkook. I did promise you a little something last night, right? I admit it was shitty of me to leave you like that, despite what you already might think of me. You probably think I’m just some insane bitch, right?”
Jungkook stares at you. “Do you want me to be honest or...?”
You roll your eyes, but you seem more amused than anything. “Save it. I know I’m weird. But, a promise is a promise…” You trail off, winking at him. “Besides, this works out for the both of us, right? I wanted to measure your dick before we meet up with Taeyong and Doyoung tomorrow, and I can help you blow your rocks right after. Seems like a deal?”
“Is it bad that I’m so ready to have you suck me off that I’m honest to God accepting your offer without any sense of dignity?”
You consider him for a moment. Then, “Nah. I know dudes who would do worse things for three grand and to have their dick sucked. I’d say you’re just doing you.” You place your hands back on his hips, thumbing around the garter of his shorts.
Jungkook groans, not even flinching when you rip his shorts and boxers off in one rough flourish. His soft dick dangles heavily between his thighs. “See, I’m not entirely comforted knowing that you agree with my moral dilemma.”
You clap your hands together, excitement glittering in your expression. “Who cares! Let’s get you all hard and ready, shall we?”
Jungkook squirms under your gaze, getting dick stage fright. “H-hey… This isn’t like porn… I can’t just get hard when I want to, you know? I need… stimulation or some shit.”
You nod, humming thoughtfully. “You’re right… And I remember you said something about taking a long time to get fully hard, right? That’s gonna be a problem indeed.” You lean forward, “So. Tell me, Jungkook. What are your kinks?”
If Jungkook was drinking water, he’s sure he’d be doing a spit take right now. Instead, he just chokes on his own saliva, coughing out his lungs at your sudden inquiry. “M-my kinks? What for?”
“To get you hard, duh.” You leave featherlight grazes around his thigh, leaving goosebumps in their wake. It stirs something inside Jungkook, but not enough to do anything yet. You tsk, your brow crumpling as you decide what to do next. “What if I…”
You dig your nails into the meat of his thighs and inadvertently pull him closer. He stumbles forward, his breath knocked out of him despite how little you’d done so far. “W-wait,” he wheezes, shock running down his spine. “I––”
You smirk at him, digging harder until you’re sure to leave white little crescents littered around his thigh. “Aha. I guessed you’d be into that. You liked it when I bit you yesterday, didn’t you?”
Jungkook can’t even answer. He’s trying to keep his breathing steady, squeezing his eyelids shut. He hears you shuffling in front of him, and he soon senses your body press closer to him, alerting him that you have stood up. You wrap your arms around his neck, bending his head down until he can feel your breath fan across his lips.
Are you going to kiss him? But the contact doesn’t come; instead, your hands snake up to his hair, massaging his scalp for a moment before tugging on his roots harshly. It pulls a whine from his lips, the response surprising even himself. “S-shit,” he grits his teeth, urging you to do it again. He opens his eyes slightly, sees you watching him with rapt attention.
You lick your lips, looking at him like a meal ready to be eaten. The heat in his stomach builds, but Jungkook doesn’t have it in him to be embarrassed anymore. He doesn’t really have any more room in his brain anymore other than his unabashedly horny thoughts.
“Pain slut, huh? Somehow, it suits you.” You sound breathy, as if you were the one being pleasured instead. It makes Jungkook’s cock twitch a little, coming to life in front of you as you continue to assault his nerves.
“Do you like pain everywhere?” Your hands leave his head, coming down to the edge of his shirt. It’s a silent request, and Jungkook allows you to lift up his sweater, leaving him completely bare before you. You throw it somewhere to your right, eyes raking him up and down. Something about you still being fully clothed makes Jungkook’s inside light on fire, and it rushes blood down south before he can even understand why.
You chuckle, looking at his hardened nipples with interest. “Pierced? What a naughty boy you are.” You flick him there experimentally, and when Jungkook’s breath hitches, that gives you a go sign to do more. You fiddle around with the rosy bud some more, circling it with the pads of your fingers until Jungkook was a whining mess before you. “Sensitive… What a prize you are, Jungkook.”
Jungkook keens at the praise, even though he knows you didn’t really mean it in a good way. He finds himself wanting to please you: to get himself hard for you, to make you want him like how he wants you. He honestly can’t tell if you’re enjoying this as much as him, other than the way you’re watching him closely like a hawk.
He’s nearly half-hard, his cock jutting against your stomach. You peer down, figuring out your next move as he holds his breath, afraid he might do something wrong. Your fingers move once more, tracing shapes across his stomach and causing the muscles there to contract. He anticipates your next movements, his dick steadily throbbing.
“I suppose the easiest way to get you hard is to touch you here, right?” you murmur lowly. You grip him by the hips all of a sudden, your thumbs placed firmly into his Adonis’ belt. You inch closer and closer to where he wants you the most, and you watch him amusedly as he clamps down on his bottom lip, unwilling to sound desperate so early in the game.
(Was it early though? He’s been thinking about this exact scenario since last night, even plaguing his dreams. Still, it wouldn’t look cool if he just… busted a nut just from having his dick out. Even he knew that was kinda sad.)
Despite his best efforts, perhaps the desperation is apparent on his face because you eventually do take pity on him. You wrap your fingers around his length, not moving just yet. You smile secretly to yourself when you hear Jungkook exhale and swallow audibly, but you’re waiting for something. You look up at him, batting your eyelashes innocently as if you didn’t have his dick in your hands.
“What do good boys say when they want something?” You’re fishing, but your teasing tone breaks Jungkook down enough to release a ragged moan. He places his hands on your shoulder, using you for support as you slowly inch your hand down to the base of his cock.
He can’t keep the whine out of his voice when he says, “P...Please. Move?”
Your grin is wicked. “Of course, baby.”
Yeah, if you keep this up, Jungkook is going to come embarrassingly fast and he doesn’t think you’ll be quite pleased with that.
There is pre-cum leaking at the tip of his cock, dangerously close to pooling over and dripping all over your carpet. You are quick to swipe it off with your thumb, dragging it down his shaft for an easier slide. Jungkook’s abs tense, his teeth clamping on his bottom lip so aggressively that he almost splits it open. His grip on your shoulders tighten, but you don’t mind. You keep stroking him languidly, not going fast enough for Jungkook’s liking, but the concentration on your face is enough to make Jungkook release a stilted moan. It doesn’t take long until the wet squelch of your hand jerking him fills the room, coupled with the sound of Jungkook’s labored breathing.
“You’re really wet,” you chuckle, watching with fascination as your words urge another drop of pre-cum to collect at his tip. “Are you always like this?”
“N-not… Really?” It takes a while for Jungkook’s brain to connect, caught between wanting to keep his eyes shut and wanting to stare at your cute hands trying to wrap around his dick. Your fingers can’t even circle the girth of his cock, the realization almost making Jungkook come there and then.
He’d never been one to be overly confident about his penis size, to be honest. He doesn’t really go around proclaiming it to the world, and his meager body count doesn’t help the fact that most people are unaware of the extent of his package. He isn’t itching to tell people either, but he’s starting to see why people would be envious of having a large dick. The sight of you struggling to pump his cock really makes for a pretty picture.
“Ugh, my arm is getting tired,” you complain after a while, getting frustrated when you realize that Jungkook is almost fully hard, but not quite. “Jeez. Your dick is so huge that it really takes a minute for the fuel tank to fill up, huh?”
“I-I’m sorry?” Jungkook wheezes, nearly crying out when you flick your wrist in just the right manner. Your hand pauses by the head of his dick, squeezing tightly enough not to be painful, much to his disappointment. Jungkook is still too shy to ask for more.
You let go of him all of a sudden, causing a guttural whine to escape Jungkook’s lips. Ignoring him, you nudge him back a few steps, Jungkook complying wordlessly. He’s still confused until you reach over to your bed, grabbing one of your pillows before dropping to your knees. Jungkook’s jaw drops, spluttering incomprehensibly as you cushion your knees with the pillow.
You look up, giggling amusedly. “Reminds you of last night, huh? Not gonna lie, I’ve been itching to have your cock in my mouth, though I’m not even sure if any of it can fit. That’s not gonna stop me from trying.”
Oh God. Oh Geez. Jungkook is going to die, isn’t he? He vaguely remembers his dream from the night before, how your pretty pink lips had stretched over his dick, barely going past his head. He whines pathetically, another string of pre-cum finally dripping down and landing on your thighs.
You hold him by his hips, preventing him from moving as your hot breath fans across his wet head. You lick your lips, taking one glance up at him before giving his tip a quick peck. It’s nothing to write home about, but the way Jungkook’s breath catches is enough to encourage you to do more. You suckle his head a little, suctioning your lips and moaning slightly at the bitter tang. Your eyes flutter shut, tongue swirling nondescript patterns as you greedily engrave his taste into your mind.
The image of you enjoying yourself is enough to get Jungkook fully hard. He feels like he’s on fire, from his flushed cheeks all the way to his groin. He doesn’t know where to put his hands, unsure if you’d allow him to pull on your hair.
You must have noticed his plight, because one of your hands leaves his hips to grasp his own, bringing it to your hair. You pop off his dick for a second, lips already redder than before. Jungkook wishes he could kiss you, but he’s still so unsure. “You can pull my hair, but if you push me down further than I’m willing to go, I’m stopping immediately, okay?” Your voice is authoritative and your gaze is steely, but it only prompts Jungkook to moan in reply.
He nods, nearly getting whiplash from how quickly his head bobs. You smirk, appeased by his obedience. You return to your ministrations, rewarding him by going further down and bobbing your head at a snail’s pace.
Jungkook’s sanity is barely hanging onto a thread. He wants to thrust into your wet mouth, never having felt this sort of pleasure in his life. He’s beginning to understand why Jimin is such a slut, and he wonders why on earth he’s been denying himself things like this. His eyes are half-lidded, but he’s determined to watch you as your masterful tongue brings him to the edge of hysteria.
When Jungkook doesn’t think your mouth can go further down, you surprise him once again. You go lower, and Jungkook feels your throat swallow around him until he nearly screams. Drool pools in the inside of his mouth, as if Jungkook’s body doesn’t know what to do with the pleasure. His legs nearly give out, but your hands keep him mounted.
His toes are curling, thighs trembling. “Fuck,” he whines, unable to stop himself when he thrusts a little into your mouth. “Shit, I didn’t mean to–”
You glance up at him. Your eyes are tearing up, but otherwise you look unperturbed. You flatten your tongue on the underside of his dick, tracing the vein there as you slowly come up for air. You swallow the mix of saliva and pre-cum in your mouth, licking your lips like you’ve just had a 5-star meal. You look absolutely debauched, though Jungkook knows he’s probably not doing much better.
“No gag reflex. It’s fine,” you shrug, as if you’d just told him about the weather. Your voice sounds hoarse, roughened by the assault of his dick on your throat. “Are you close?”
Jungkook doesn’t want to admit it, but– “Yes,” he says. He’s breathing like he’s just run a marathon, sweat dripping down his neck. You observe it drip down his body, as it curves down his neck and to his chest.
“You aren’t coming until I say so, got it?” You warn. He nods, cock twitching in desperation for your mouth to continue what it was doing.
But instead, you reach back to your bed, and Jungkook finally notices the tape measure that you’d left there. Oh right. Jungkook is brought back to reality, suddenly remembering why he’d gone here in the first place.
“This will only take a second, baby,” you whisper lowly, and Jungkook’s conscience is shot out of his head once more. Call him baby one more time, and Jungkook is sure to bust his load. He’s worried he might gain a Pavlovian response to the word; getting hard every time someone so much as utters “baby” for whatever reason.
You unravel the measuring tape, placing the end of it near the base of his member. You drag it over his length, whistling in awe as the number keeps growing and growing. “Shit, you really are huge,” you gasp in amazement, peering closely at the measurement to make sure you aren’t reading it wrong. “Nearly nine inches. Are you insane?”
Jungkook chuckles in embarrassment, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s… nothing?”
You snort, shaking your head at the pure audacity of this boy in front of you. “No need to humblebrag, baby. Unless you want me to degrade you, then stop being coy with me.”
At the word “degrade,” Jungkook’s erection twitches with interest. Of course, you notice. “Oh? You want me to degrade you?”
Jungkook’s face heats up, forever astonished by your brazenness. “N-no! That’s not what I–”
“You want me to call your cock pathetic, huh? Is that what you want?”
Jungkook whines, shifting from foot to foot as he tries to avoid your lustful gaze. “I…”
“Want me to call you names, huh? Took your cock so long to get hard, struggled so much to get it up. What a useless dick that you have…” you trail off, covering your mouth behind your hand to hide your grin.
Jungkook feels like he’s about to fall over. The pressure in between his legs is reaching his breaking point, and Jungkook really doesn’t want to embarrass himself by coming untouched. He has a sinking suspicion you’d enjoy it if he did, however.
Your hand slides back to his crotch, cupping his erection once more. You run your palm along him once, enjoying the way his breath hitches. He’s undeniably close and it fills you with pride knowing that you did this to him. “You’re close.” You say it like a fact.
Jungkook squirms. “Please… Faster… I’m so close, Y/N. Just a lil bit more, please…”
“I love it when you beg,” you laugh, sounding a little mean. “But since you’ve been nice all this time, I’ll let you.”
Your hands speed up, twisting and pulling him in ways that Jungkook isn’t sure are possible. He’s full-on panting like a fucking dog right now, humping shallowly into your hand like he’s lost his mind. He’s so unbelievably close, the heat in his stomach climbing higher and higher until––
“SHIT! Y/N!”
You stop, confused. That shout didn’t sound like Jungkook. You turn to your closed door, ears straining for the sound again. “Yoongi?” you call out. “Did you say something?”
Muffled footsteps come rushing closer. Your doorknob jiggles, but Jungkook had thankfully locked it when he’d come into the room earlier. Yoongi huffs from behind the door, banging loudly on the frame. “Y/N! Help! I fucking dropped the cheesecake!”
“He dropped the cheesecake,” you repeat dully to yourself. You share a look with Jungkook. The banging doesn’t stop.
“Y/N PLEASEEE THE KITCHEN IS A MESS!” Yoongi screams, uncaring of whatever he was interrupting. “YOU OWE ME! I PAID FOR YOUR RENT LAST MONTH SO YOU GOTTA HELP!”
“I hate that bastard,” you sigh, defeated. You let go of Jungkook reluctantly, giving him an apologetic look. Jungkook wants to cry. “I’m… really sorry for leaving you again like this. I…” you hesitate, looking at the door then back to him. “I do kind of owe him, so…”
Jungkook exhales shakily, bending down to the floor to pick his shirt up. He dresses quietly, cheeks burning. Why must you keep torturing him like this? He thinks his balls might explode at this point. “It’s no problem… I’ll just take care of myself at home.”
You peer at him, feeling incredibly guilty. “I have a connecting bathroom. You could use it if you want?”
“That’d be great, thanks.” Jungkook says before hurriedly rushing out of there. He refuses to look at you as he slams the bathroom door shut, breathing slowly through his nostrils in an attempt to calm himself. He waits as he listens for you to leave before his hands scramble back onto his dick, loudly crying out as he tugs himself to completion.
His legs give out from under him as he slides down to the floor, spurts of hot cum flying past his fist. Wave after wave of pleasure tingles down his spine as he slides up and down his cock. After his dick shoots its last droplet of cum, Jungkook slams his head against your bathroom wall. He’s exhausted.
He closes his eyes, thinks about how his life has led him up to this moment. Jizzing in some near stranger’s home while one of his best friends cleans up his fallen cheesecake.
“Jesus fucking Christ I hate it here,” he says. He gets up unsteadily, washing his hands of his mess.
x x x x x
Fully dressed and unsatisfyingly sated, Jungkook exits your bathroom with a flush down his neck. He keeps his eyes averted from you, but not before glaring heatedly at Yoongi as he turns to leave. Yoongi cocks his head to the side, annoyingly unaware of what he had done.
“You okay, dude? You look like a bull ready to pummel me,” Yoongi snickers, bemused by Jungkook’s flared nostrils. “Seriously. You okay?”
You slap Yoongi on the thigh, huffing angrily as you stay squatted on the floor, your other hand busy wiping off the cheesecake from the floor with a paper towel. “Shut up. You’ve done enough shitheadery today.”
Yoongi looks at the mounted clock on your fridge. “It’s only 7PM. My shitheadery doesn’t clock out until 10PM today.”
Rolling his eyes, Jungkook waves his goodbye. “Well. I guess I’ll see you guys,” he murmurs, inching closer to the door. He walks out in silence, no longer bothering to hide his pouting. He takes the elevator down, ruminating on his existence. When he reaches the ground floor, his phone immediately dings with a notification.
from: y/n l/n ❣️
hey. please don’t hate me. i’m really sorry. raincheck?
Jungkook snorts, stopping in his tracks. It’s always just rainchecks with you. He types up a quick response.
from: jjk
it’s not your fault. it’s fine.
from: y/n l/n ❣️
you sure? you got off well by yourself at least, right?
from: jjk
yeah. don’t worry about it.
from: y/n l/n ❣️
if you’re down… i could help you through the phone? when you get home? :( i just feel really bad. like, genuinely. yoongi is an asshole.
The offer sounds interesting, but sadly, Jungkook is out of juice for the day. He’s got a lot of stamina for many things, but it turns out he’s out of practice when it comes to his own dick.
from: jjk
nah it’s fine. thanks though.
from: y/n l/n ❣️
i hope you’re still down for the contest? doyoung texted me while we were busy a while ago and said that they were free tomorrow after 12?
from: jjk
no worries. i’ll be there.
from: y/n l/n ❣️
<3 ty you’re the best!! <3
He groans, slapping himself in the face. God, he is so fucking whipped.
x x x x x
The next day, Jungkook wakes up with a burning headache. He feels hungover even though he didn’t drink at all the night before, and Jungkook wonders if his brain had somehow deflated overnight with how hollow he feels. He grabs his phone from his bed stand, sees a new text from you reminding him of what he’d promised.
You had sent him an address to another apartment complex just a few bus stops away from where he lives and he assumes this must be either Doyoung’s or Taeyong’s place. He shuts his eyes for another few moments, trying his best to remember how to live.
It’s already nearing noon, so he needs to get going if he doesn’t want to be late. He shudders to think what you might do if he ghosts you. Despite how guilty you were yesterday for leaving him mid-nut, he doesn’t think that debt will cover him if he chooses not to show up to the dick-measuring contest.
On the bus, he fidgets in his seat, picking at the rips in his jeans and doing anything to keep his mind busy. He keeps thinking that someone knows what he’s up to, paranoia eating him from the inside out as he darts his eyes left and right, hoping no one can actually read minds. The bus is relatively empty, with only him and an elderly couple sitting near the front. They seem none the wiser, though Jungkook fears what they would think if they knew what he was up to.
He almost wishes he was wearing Seokjin’s thot shorts, as the skimpy excuse of clothing had somehow given him some sort of confidence the day before. Gone is that false sense of (misplaced) bravado; instead, Jungkook is filled with anxiety at the prospect of showing a couple of strangers his dick.
(A fairly human response, but that doesn’t help Jungkook’s current case.)
He arrives at the apartment complex in record time, and he sees you standing by the entrance. You look well-rested, your hands fiddling with your phone. Jungkook has only ever seen you when you were wearing that revealing dress from the club and your pajamas from your home, so he’s kind of shocked to see you look cute in your simple white dress and jean jacket. Not that you didn’t look good those other times, but seeing you look like a normal university student is astonishing, for lack of better word.
You almost look like a regular girl just waiting for her date to pick her up.
“Hey!” You greet him cheerily when you see him approach, waving at him. He waves back, the apples of his cheeks dusted pink from his previous thoughts. She’s not your date, you weirdo. Wait, she’s the weirdo. Get it together man! This shit is fucked up.
“This is their place, I assume?” Jungkook asks, looking at the building. It appears almost identical to your own apartment complex, minus the mini water fountain at the front. Ah, the wonders of living in a concrete jungle.
“Yep,” you nod. You start walking towards the entrance, with Jungkook following closely. “You ready? God, I can’t wait to see Doyoung’s stupid face. He’s gonna be so pissed!”
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Jungkook mutters, vibrating with nerves.
You both make your way to the apartment, with you humming quietly while he sweats profusely beside you. At least one of you is having fun, he thinks grimly to himself. You reach apartment 322, knocking three times before a boy with neat black hair opens the door.
“Y/N! Good to see you,” the boy says, reaching for a hug. You hug him back enthusiastically, ignoring Jungkook’s bemused stares. If this boy is either Doyoung or Taeyong, aren’t you supposed to… hate both of their guts? Or at least, not be friends? What even is going on?
When you step back, you point at Jungkook offhandedly. “Oh yeah, this is Jungkook. The guy I’m dating.”
Jungkook nearly chokes on his own spit, but luckily the boy doesn’t notice. Right… You guys are supposed to be dating. It’s not real, though. Get a grip! “Hi, I’m Jungkook,” he wheezes, shaking the other guy’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you…”
“I’m Doyoung,” he introduces himself, a small smile on his lips. “Nice to meet you too. I’ve heard… a lot about you, so to speak.”
Jungkook squeaks, earning a chuckle from Doyoung. “No need to be embarrassed. I think we’re way past that point now. Sorry for roping you into this, by the way. But when Y/N wants to fight, well… Let’s just say I’m not going to be the first one who backs down.”
“Says the dude who couldn’t even beat me at arm wrestling,” you snort, pushing past Doyoung and walking into his home. Doyoung rolls his eyes, gesturing for Jungkook to come in.
“Props to you for dating her, by the way. I’ve been friends with that demon since elementary school, so I know what she’s like. You must be a guy with strong willpower,” Doyoung says.
“I’m… Sorry for saying this, but I’m kind of confused? I didn’t know you guys were friends,” Jungkook says, examining Doyoung’s apartment. It’s a lot bigger than yours, though he does recall you saying that Doyoung was filthy rich. It’s a lot more modern looking for sure, as Jungkook can see that Doyoung has two industrial-sized refrigerators in his kitchen. What kind of university student needs two industrial-sized refrigerators?
“Yeah, we are. She actually only dated Taeyong because she knew we both liked each other but I was too stubborn to make a move, so she did the only thing she knew how to do: be an asshole,” he explains simply. Jungkook nods, needing no further clarification.
“Jungkook! Come with me,” you pop out from one of the doorways deeper in the apartment, beckoning him closer. You point at Doyoung, “And you. Get Taeyong ready. I’m gonna need a few minutes to get Jungkook in tip-top shape!”
Doyoung chuckles, shoving Jungkook towards you. “Well, that’s my cue. I’ll introduce you to Taeyong later, I guess. He’s in my bedroom, so we’ll come out in about 20 minutes? That should be enough time, right?”
Yeah. Right. Jungkook walks numbly towards you, arms rigged by his sides as you pull him into Doyoung’s spare bathroom. You lock the door close, whirling around to face him with your hands on your hips. You’ve rolled your sleeves up, appearing like a demented surgeon preparing to dissect him. “Well! Strip!”
Jungkook is clumsy when he unbuttons his jeans, his entire body feeling like it’s being weighed down by pounds of lead. He shucks them off, leaving him in his boxers (thankfully, with no holes in them. He made sure to double-check before he left this morning.) You appraise him silently, thinking of what to do next.
Before Jungkook can say anything, your hands are already on his chest, pointer fingers placed near his nipples. His piercings are visible through his thin shirt, much to your appreciation. You circle them lazily, much like how you did yesterday.
Jungkook can’t relax long enough to enjoy it, however. His shoulders are tense, fists clenched behind his back. He’s trying to stop thinking about what’s going to happen, trying to enjoy your touch. He grits his teeth, swallowing thickly.
“I… I can’t do this, Y/N.” he mumbles. “I don’t think I can get hard. I’m too nervous.”
You pause in your movements. “You’re nervous?” you purr, voice lowering. Jungkook stops fidgeting to stare at you, sensing the shift in your demeanor. “How can I alleviate that, hmm?”
“What?”
You pinch his nipples, hard. He gasps, whimpering right after from the jolt of pain. “I think I know how to calm you down,” you murmur, staring him down like he’s nothing more than a delicious snack.
“You want me to hurt you, huh? Is that it? Answer me, slut.” You say those words, but there’s a small bit of hesitation in your expression, like you’re worried if he truly likes it. When he nods enthusiastically, urging you to go on, you smile softly at him. His heart hammers in his chest, a small case of butterflies beginning to erupt there. You look kinda cute, even if you have his nipples in a twist.
“If it’s too much, just say ‘dumbo’ and I’ll stop, okay?” Jungkook nods once more, eager to get going.
You smirk, letting go of his nipples and gripping his hips instead. Your thumbs stay innocently above his boxers. “Do you like it when I call you names too, huh? You like being pinched and prodded?”
Jungkook whines, already turning needy. The anxiety from a while ago slowly drains away, leaving only lust to cloud his mind. “N-no, I just…”
“No?” You laugh, your thumbs catching on the garter of his boxers and pulling them down until the tip of his cock peeks out, already in the midst of getting hard. “Then what’s this?”
“Nggh…” Jungkook can’t say anything, can only stare helplessly at you.
“Pathetic. You have a nine-inch cock but it’s good for nothing except earning me a bit of money. Shame, isn’t it? Would be nice if you knew how to use it, then maybe I’d let you fuck me,” you say, edging closer to him until your lips find his exposed collarbones. You suck harshly, giddy when color immediately blooms at the spot. You thread your fingers into his dark, fluffy hair – and tug.
It’s too much all at once – Jungkook isn’t ready for any of it at all. He’s panting, whining, drooling a little. He shimmies his hips a little, his boxers sliding down his thighs and onto the marble floor. His cock springs free, already dripping pre-cum but still only half-hard.
“Ah, there it is. Your big useless cock. My, my… Already dirtying Doyoungie’s floor with your slick, huh? You gonna make the floor wet, baby?”
Jungkook garbles something; did he say something? Who knows. All he knows right now is that 1) you’re making him lose his marbles and 2) he’s embarrassingly close. He’s never gotten this hard so fast in his entire life, and he might be suffering from blood loss or something. His head feels light, like he’s floating. His entire body is thrumming, senses filled with nothing but you.
You gently lead him closer to the bathtub where you sit, still paying no attention to his weeping arousal. Your mouth is dangerously close to it though, but you make no move to hold him in your mouth. Instead, you hike your skirt up until it reaches your waist, revealing your white panties. Jungkook zeroes in on the darkening patch, a shuddering breath leaving his lungs. He’s screwed.
“Show me how you pleasured yourself yesterday, when you were in my bathroom,” you say, caressing the front of your panties. You grind against your palm, eyelashes fluttering as your jaw drops into an ‘o’. You exhale through your nose, laughing breathily. “If you do well, then maybe I’ll show you what I did when you left, hmm?”
Jungkook has never moved faster in his life than he did then. He takes his erection into his hands, sighing with relief when he begins to pump. He moves slower than he usually would, unwilling to finish so soon after getting this far. He’s already wound up from your teasing (and if you count the past few days, then let’s say he’s been edged long enough.)
You study him with sharp eyes, focusing on the movement of his hands. “That’s it. It must be easy jerking off with how wet you are, huh?”
“Y-yeah.” Jungkook speeds up, flicking his wrist and focusing on the sensitive tip of his cock. His attention is pulled when he sees you shift from the corner of his eye. His grip stutters when you push your panties to the side, giving him a full view of your glistening core. He licks his lips, aching to put his mouth there but only if you’d allow him.
“Why’d you stop?” You stretch your leg out, using your foot to urge his wrist to keep moving. “Come on. I want to see you.”
You circle your clit leisurely before dipping your fingers into your pussy two fingers at a time, wet enough for the slide to be smooth. Jungkook quickens his pace, wanting to match your speed. He watches, mesmerized, at the sight of your fingers pushing in and out.
The obscene sounds coming from the both of you is loud enough to mask Jungkook’s desperate mewls. He’s going faster now, wanting nothing more than to cum all over you and your pussy. You’d look good in his cum, the pearly droplets would look good in contrast with your perfect skin.
Your thighs are shaking, your own breathing shallow as you quickly approach your end. You’re moaning in tandem with him, your arousal coating your fingers generously as it begins to run down the back of your hand. You’re scissoring yourself, but it’s barely enough when you compare it to Jungkook’s cock. No, nothing would be enough to prepare you to take him. He’d ruin you, and the thought of him breaking you is enough to help you tip over the edge.
“Fuuuuuuck,” you moan, eyes screwing shut as you are wrought with the strongest orgasm of your life. More wetness drips out of you as you rub frantically at your clit, riding your high. You look at Jungkook through your eyelashes, lips parted. “Fuck,” you repeat.
Jungkook can’t hold back anymore. He knows he shouldn’t cum but the pleasure is skyrocketing at an unparalleled speed. His balls tighten, the heat in his abdomen building until he can’t hold back even if he tried. He shudders once, twice, before jets of his cum spills from over his fist, some of the droplets making their way onto your thighs. He moans at the sight, doesn’t try to change his trajectory as his mind is completely hazed with lust. “Shit, I’m–” Jungkook grinds one last time into his hand, before promptly slumping down onto the floor.
“Jesus, that was a lot of cum,” he hears you say, but he can’t bring himself to look at you. He’s ashamed, having cummed without your permission. He can feel his dick softening underneath him, and he dimly remembers that hadn’t been the plan at all. He was supposed to get hard, have his dick measured, and then finish if he was allowed. And now, he ruined everything because he couldn’t hold himself back.
“I’m… I’m sorry,” he mutters quietly, hiding behind his cum-stained hands. He cringes when the mess enters his eyes, wiping his palm somewhere on his leg. “Fuck. I messed everything up. You were just… It was too much… You…”
“Should’ve used your safety word, Jungkook.”
“It wasn’t because it was bad,” Jungkook’s cheeks flush, “It was… too good.”
You kneel beside him, cradling his chin and forcing him to look at you. He had been afraid to see disappointment in your eyes, so he’s absolutely surprised to see you look… amused. You’re even giggling a little.
“Sorry. I went a bit overboard. Even I get horny sometimes,” you shrug, wiping a bit of cum away from his forehead. Your own fingers are slick with your own cum, so really, you were just making a bigger mess of his face. Jungkook can’t say he’s opposed to a little mess. “You just looked so good that I couldn’t help myself.”
“You… enjoyed yourself, too? I’m not insane for thinking there’s something between us?”
“Honestly, you’re at least a little bit insane,” you laugh at his dumbfounded expression. “What? I’m cuckoo, and you know it. The fact that you got turned on by me even after all I’d done to you… Really puts you into perspective, huh?”
Jungkook grumbles, but he’s no longer frowning. “I guess. My friends tell me I have a type, and I guess you fit the bill.”
You laugh wholeheartedly at that, and it brings a smile to Jungkook’s face. He likes it when you laugh, he decides. “Same here. I guess you’re my type, too.”
You peer down at his flaccid dick. “Too bad about your meat flute, though. Unless you can get it back up in the next 2 minutes, then I don’t think you’re getting that three grand.”
“Please don’t call my dick that,” Jungkook says before shrugging his shoulders. “And it’s no worries. I had the biggest nut of my life and that’s good enough to me. Plus, you said you’d give me one thousand dollars if I agreed to help you out, so you better not back out on that.”
You snigger, patting him gently on the shoulder. “Yeah, whatever. But not before we get out of here and you fuck my brains out, got it? You need to work for it, baby.”
Is it bad that his cock was already beginning to stir once more? Unprecedented, as it usually took Jungkook ages to get back up. Maybe you really were the one for him.
“Deal. Let’s get out of here?”
When the two of you finish getting cleaned up and leave the bathroom with no evidence that you had even been there, Doyoung doesn’t even bat an eye as you walk past him, eager to get out of the door. Taeyong is lounging on the couch with his dick… mysteriously still in his pants, as if he had no intention of taking them off in the first place.
“Sorry, we need to leave. There’s an emergency we have to attend to. See you, Doyoungie!” You tug Jungkook along, who waves his own hasty goodbye.
The door clicks shut, leaving the couple alone once more. Taeyong grins up at Doyoung, “You really are amazing, Doyoung. How’d you know she’d end up with him?”
Doyoung flicks open his phone, showing Taeyong his text messages with none other than Kim Seokjin himself. “All according to keikaku, my love. Kim Seokjin always wins.”
#networkbangtan#armiesnet#btsghostie#jungkook smut#bts smut#jungkook x reader#bts x reader#bts reader insert#bts fanfiction#bts scenarios#bts#jungkook scenarios#jeon jungkook#jungkook#bts jungkook#bangtan#bts fanfic#no more smut for 2020......... NO MORE#next fic is angst idc anymore I NEED TO CLEANSE MYSELF AHHHHHH
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