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actuallysaiyan · 2 months

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No Other Heart(Executioner!Kenpachi Zaraki x Fem!Princess!Reader)

warnings: smut, mentions of violence/executions, Fantasy AU!, canon divergent, loss of virginity, oral sex(Fem!Receiving), use of pet names(little dove, princess), reader has pubic hair, slight tummy bulge kink, use of Sir, Kenpachi is an executioner, creampie finish/unprotected sex word count: 3k!!! pairings: Executioner!Kenpachi Zaraki x Fem!Princess!Reader a/n: this is for the lovely Vero(@yeowangies) who's helped me so much with this idea! <<_<< Knight Renji might be the next instalment in this kind of Fantasy series!

Sometimes you feel like a bird trapped in a cage. The princess who’s never allowed to leave the castle. They say it’s for your own good, but you never really know about that. Hiding you away in the castle seemed to only hinder you. For hours, you’d stare outside your window and wish for freedom.

The only thing that seemed to brighten your days was your bodyguard, Sir Kenpachi. Everyone else was terrified of the large and intimidating man, but you always found comfort in him. He kept you safe whenever you were allowed to leave the castle. He accompanied you anywhere you needed him to. And whenever he wasn’t your bodyguard, he was the royal executioner.

You remember when you were a child, you had seen him once splattered in blood and gore. It scared you so deeply, and you had cried in your sleep that night. It had only gotten worse when he was assigned as your bodyguard. You shuddered at his scary face and threatening demeanor. He was such a horror to be seen, such a terrifying image that was burned into your mind. The more you witnessed him after the job he did, the more you found yourself so terrified of this man.

As time went on, you became intrigued by the big man who’s in charge of keeping you safe. You even began to enjoy seeing him covered in blood. Knowing that he’s the man who would kill anyone to keep you safe, it made your heart race like nothing else. This man was the only one who could keep you safe. And slowly but surely, you realized you were enamored by him. He was the only person who could truly keep you safe. The only man you could trust outside of your own father.

The rumors about him being a virgin killer only confused and aroused you even more. You were pure yourself, knowing you’d be pure until your wedding night. But Sir Kenpachi was known as someone who sleeps almost exclusively with virgins. And you shuddered whenever you thought about the second meaning to that term. Maybe he was someone who also found himself having to kill the pure and the innocent.

You knew that as time would go on, you’d be too invested and attracted to the man who was in charge of killing others. The man who’s kept you safe since you were a young woman until this very day. And now that you’re older, you’re finding yourself so interested and intrigued by the idea of having sex and falling in love.

It was never going to happen on its own, and not in a natural way. You were always going to be married off to some prince from a faraway land, and you were always going to have someone watching to make sure the consummation of your marriage was legitimate.

But it all happened so fast one night…

There had been a very large riot in the city, and your father had been assassinated. Your mother was taken away from the kingdom by her own bodyguard, leaving you to be in the care of Sir Kenpachi. You struggled against his tight hold, begging and pleading.

“No please! Let me go!” You whined, trying to break free of his hold.

He shakes his head, “No, I can’t.”

He’s rough as he places you on horseback, getting on behind you. You’re crying and begging to turn back, but he knows there’s no way he can bring you back to your castle. Everything has changed within one night, and even if you were to come back, it would be much too dangerous.

“Listen to me, little dove.” He says to you, “You’re not going to be safe unless you stay with me.”

And his words ring true. The deeper into the forest you ride, the more you realize you’d never be able to deal with all of this on your own. He has a tight hold on you, while the other hand holds onto the reins. Kenpachi steers the horse through thick forest and deep swamp, all while keeping you safe from unwanted bandits popping up out of nowhere and wild beasts ready to swipe at you.

At last, you two reach a small safe haven; a cottage nestled in the brush. It’s not what you’d call home, but it’s going to be the place you’ll be staying for the next little while. He helps you off the horse, and he opens the door. You’re surprised to find it outfitted with the amenities you’d need for the next little while. As you sit on a chair in the kitchen, Sir Kenpachi works on getting a fire going. It’s cozy here, especially when he lights a few lanterns to make it even brighter. You begin to feel a bit more at ease.

“There’s a bath in the other room,” Kenpachi grunts. “If you want to get cleaned up. I can heat up water for you.”

You smile softly, “That would be nice.”

You’ve never seen him be this soft and domestic before. This is the man you’ve seen murder people countless times for the greater good of the kingdom. This is the same man you’ve heard threaten outsiders if they looked at you the wrong way. Your heart melts at the thought of him taking such good care of you.

With the fire roaring, he begins to boil some water for your bath. You begin inspecting the rest of the cottage. There’s a living area with lots of books and a comfy sofa. You find the materials to knit, sew and crochet as well. Then you head towards the bathroom, which has indoor plumbing other than the bath. You’re impressed that Sir Kenpachi knew to bring you here.

But when it comes to the bedroom, this is when you panic. There’s only one bedroom, and only one bed. This means he’s either going to have to sleep on the sofa, which won’t be comfy at all for him and his big frame, or he’s going to have to sleep with you in the bed. You wonder if you’ll manage to keep your urges to yourself.

“Your bath water is ready, little dove.” Kenpachi whispers gruffly in your ear. You gasp, turning around to look at him.

He can see the panic written all over your face. He knows that you must be wondering if he’ll sleep with you in the same bed. He’s watched you blossom from a young woman to the dainty beautiful princess you are now. You’ve always been so beautiful in his eyes, but he’s never wanted to sully you with his dirty hands. He’s got the blood of thousands of criminals, unwanted and bandits on his hands. How would you even want to be touched by someone like him?

He brings you into the bathroom. Kenpachi turns towards the door, but you softly take his hand in yours. You smile up at him, it’s a sincere and genuine smile.

“Please,” you plead. “Sir Kenpachi, I need help undoing the corset.”

You turn your back towards him, and he swallows hard. Now he thinks you’re just toying with him. He knows better than to refuse an order from the princess like this. So with his large hands, he undoes the laces to your corseted dress. As the fabric opens up to show your lithe skin, he’s growing hard beneath his pants. You turn just a little to smile at him again, causing his heart to race.

“For a big executioner,” you simper, “you’ve got soft hands.”

His eyes widened, unsure of how to even answer that. He stares at you for a few moments, and you appreciate the dusting of pink on his cheeks. He looks so human like this, so much softer than you’ve ever seen him before, He’s sweeter than you’ve ever experienced him.

He leaves you to bathe in peace, and he begins to pace. How could you say something like that to him? Everyone fears him, everyone is petrified when they see him. Kenpachi makes babies cry just by looking at them. Women shield the eyes of their children as he walks by. Mothers make sure to tell their daughters never to fall in love with such filth as him.

And yet, here you are, the princess of the nation…and you’re flirting with him.

It causes him to have such conflicting emotions. He couldn’t just deflower you. You were a princess, even if your country and kingdom were in turmoil. One day, you’d be marrying a prince and having a love of your own. He’d have to let you go that day, which is a thought that terrifies him like nothing at all.

He looks up from his spot on the bed when you tiptoe your way into the room. A fluffy towel is wrapped around your body, hiding the beauty that lies underneath.

“O-oh! I’m sorry, Sir Kenpachi. I had nothing to wear.”

He comes over to you, his eyes dark with something you’ve never seen before. It’s almost like he’s ready to execute someone, but it’s not quite the same. It’s a different look that you’ve never seen in his eyes before.

You can’t even think properly when he shoves you onto the bed. He thought he’d take it slow, but Kenpachi has been waiting for you for years. He’s been wanting this for so long, his cock is just aching. You moan as he presses his lips onto yours roughly.

“You’ve teased me for too long, little dove.” He grunts as he presses himself against you. You can feel his hardened member throbbing against you. “I need to have you.”

Your eyes widen and you try to protest, telling him that you’re pure and you intend to be pure on your wedding night. But nothing seems to faze him. Nothing seems to be clicking. Despite your feeble attempts at trying to get him off of you, you know you couldn’t deny him even if you wanted to.

“I’ve spent my life keeping you safe, my little dove. Do you really believe I’d stop now just because you are to be married off to some dumb prince who doesn’t know how to use his cock?”

The words excite you like nothing before. Your heart races in your chest; like a hummingbird’s wings flapping in the wind. You wrap your arms around his big frame, pulling him closer again. This time, you know you’re ready for a kiss.

“Teach me,” you beg him. “Teach me how to make love.”

He doesn’t need much more persuasion than that. He lays you down properly on the eiderdown bed and presses his lips to yours once more. This time it’s deeper and more sensual. When he slips his tongue into your mouth, he realizes just how inexperienced you are. Your kissing is sloppy and messy, but it only serves to turn him on even more.

His large hands, that would so easily crush your skull, gently cup your face. Kenpachi takes the lead, showing you how to kiss in a passionate way. You learn quickly, but he finds you so eager. Even when you slip up and become sloppy, it turns him on,

“That’s a good girl,” his praise goes straight between your thighs.

He then pulls off the fluffy towel, revealing your pretty body to him. Nobody has ever seen your body in this way before. Your perky nipples are begging to be sucked on. Your cute little cunt is concealed by a little patch of pubic hair. Kenpachi isn’t even sure where he wants to begin.

He starts with cupping your breasts, making you moan just for him. His thumbs brush against your nipples, and you shudder with each time they do that. He loves the sounds you make whenever he’s teasing you like this. When he dips down to capture one of your perky nubs between his lips, you feel your body growing warmer. It’s almost too much to just have him sucking on your nipples.

“You taste so good,” he murmurs against your skin. “Like roses…vanilla…”

Your heart skips a beat at his words. He takes his time, suckling and nipping at the swell of your breasts and your nipples. Then he begins to press sloppy kisses down your body before spreading your legs. Just the sight of your glistening cunt surrounded by the cute little patch of pubic hair really is driving him crazy. The executioner thinks he should take it slow, but the minute his tongue presses against your folds, he’s hooked.

With strong hands, he pulls you even closer. You squirm and thrash under him as he laps and slurps you up like you’re his last meal. Saliva and arousal smears all over the bottom half of his face. He’s grunting and growling as he devours you.

“S-Sir! Oh I…” but you can barely say anything as all that falls from your pretty lips are moans and pleas.

Kenpachi looks up at you, and when your gazes lock, you swear you’ve never seen such a lewd sight before. Your body shudders as you feel something deep in your tummy. It’s like a pressure that keeps building. You don’t know what it is, but you feel like you’re almost chasing that sensation.

“That’s it, little dove. Let go for me,”

You aren’t even quite sure what he means, but you continue to chase the new feeling deep inside you. He wraps his lips around your swollen clit, suckling on it like it’s his favorite sweet. Suddenly, the coil in your stomach snaps and you’re crying out. Begging and pleading tumble from you like a desperate prayer. Kenpachi continues to suckle and lap at you, prolonging the pleasure even more.

Slowly, he crawls back on top of you. His clothing is shed without much care, thrown around the room. Then he spreads your thighs even more as you get a good look at his dick. It’s a lot bigger than you’d ever imagined. The tip is red and oozing precum, and you feel your mouth water as you look at it. You want to taste him, but it would seem he’s got other plans.

“Let me be the one to show you true pleasure,” he says as he lets the tip of his cock nestle against your entrance. “Let me be the one who knows you the most.”

You’re so touched by his sweet words. You don’t even know what to say. Tears sting your eyes, and Kenpachi smiles softly. He kisses you; this kiss is much more loving than the previous ones. Then he looks into your eyes once more.

“Please, be mine.” You finally mutter.

Very carefully, Kenpachi begins slipping into you. A surprised gasp is ripped from you as you feel your cunt being stretched. He hushes you with sweet kisses and words of praise. One of his hands comes down to begin rubbing your clit.

“Taking me so good, little dove. You’re doing well, you just need to relax, okay?”

You nod your head, unable to say proper words. You can barely think as his cock splits you in half. More and more of him goes into you, making you feel all these new sensations. You’ve never known pleasure like this before, and you can tell you could easily become addicted to this.

“Just like that, sweetheart.” Kenpachi breathes against your neck. He’s almost all the way in.

His eyes roll back as he feels the way your walls are already milking him. How could it be this good? He’s the virgin killer after all, he’s fucked all kinds of women. But you were the one who felt the best. You feel like heaven to him. Maybe it’s because he’s cared for you for so long.

“Sir Kenpachi—” he interrupts you.

“Just Kenpachi, sweetheart.”

You hiccup as your hand reaches down to your lower tummy. His eyes widen when he realizes what you’re doing. You're feeling the bulge that his cock is making as he slides into you fully. He bottoms out and his hand meets yours. A warmth passes over the both of you, and soon you’re both more aroused than before.

“That’s it,” Kenpachi praises as he begins thrusting into you. “You can feel me that deep.”

You have no words. You just begin mewling and panting like all the virgins do. Whenever Kenpachi fucks them stupid, he enjoys watching them become so corrupted by the pleasure. You wrap your legs around him, desperate to feel him even deeper. Kenpachi quickens his pace, his hands gripping your hips to pull you in closer with each thrust.

“You’re mine now,” he tells you before kissing you so deeply. “Nobody can touch you.”

Your heart swells with love. You find yourself clinging to him, begging him for even more. He happily responds to your demands with fucking you harder and faster, his thumb coming down to rub your clit. He knows you’ll fall off the edge quickly because he gave you an orgasm before this. He’s just not sure how much longer he can hold on when you feel this fucking good.

“T-that feeling again…” you pant out,

Kenpachi smirks, “Yeah? Don’t worry, just go with that feeling.”

You listen to his advice. The more he thrusts into you, the closer you get to that same feeling as earlier. Kenpachi growls as his pace gets even quicker and rougher. The headboard of the bed begins to slam against the wall as he fucks into you like an animal in heat.

“Cum for me!” He grunts loudly. “Let go for me, princess.”

The dam breaks, the coil snaps. You cry out loudly, your nails digging into his back as your orgasm hits you so hard. Your silky walls begin to clench and pulse around his big cock, making his balls draw up. He’s grunting like an animal as he chases his own high, and soon his hips stutter.

“Take it all,” he grunts. “Take my seed.”

His cock throbs within you as shots of his hot, potent cum fill up your waiting womb. He’s fucking it into you, slowing down the rocking of his hips as his high washes over him. Then he looks at you, noticing the look on your face. You’re just fucked out now.

“Perfect,” he praises before kissing you. “You’ll do well to be my wife now.”

#bacon.writes #kenpachi x reader #kenpachi x you #kenpachi x y/n #kenpachi zaraki x reader #kenpachi zaraki x you #kenpachi zaraki x y/n #kenpachi smut #bleach kenpachi x reader #bleach x reader #bleach x you #bleach smut #kenpachi zaraki smut #fantasy au

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namig42 · 3 months

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I FINALLY GOT A GOOD ENDING IN BG3 AND I'M CRYING

I finished my Durge run with my character Vero, and for once my character got a happy ending! Everyone that survived is happy, and Vero and Astarion have been travelling for months together.

I decided to drink with them all during the epilogue party, and my port has made me extra emotional 😭. Astarion and Halsin with his little whittled duck have especially moved me and I'm a puddle of tears. Only took me over 400 hours for a good ending, but it was so worth it. Also Lae'zel with the baby gith egg? MY HEART CAN'T TAKE ALL THIS SWEETNESS. WYLL FOUGHT DINOSAURS, I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS

#bg3 #astarion #halsin #I'm so happy #I'm tipsy and crying happy tears #what a wonderful world #lae'zel #wyll #spoilers #vero

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12percentspider · 5 months

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12/6/23 Update: Kelly/Kellie/Stacy: Insulin Scam

This is "Kellie/Kelly". At first glance, I'd say "oh, mood, I have type 1 also, I do fully believe everyone should be able to have life-preserving medication available to them.

"Hold on", you might say, "I just got an ask in my inbox by someone with almost that exact situation, they just need more money than that." Well, that's the thing.

"Is it a coincidence maybe? Two people that need the same thing? Type 1 diabetes isn't that rare..." Let's look at "Kellie/Kelly"'s twitter photos, huh?

"They could have the exact same meter and exact same blood sugar?" Come on now. "What's that middle thing?" OH, GLAD YOU ASKED, HYPOTHETICAL SKEPTIC (good thing to be, not slamming that part, always check research for yourself)!

I have zero goddamn idea why they're pulling the "help i'm being impersonated" thing because it is extremely weird and doesn't make any sense. It's been tried on here, one of the accounts I've linked in another post through paypal addresses/names in common had a whole "this is a scam!!!" about one of the other vero-og variant urls.

BUT ANYWAY. The donation link on the "original" [using that term loosely] twitter account goes to a "Kelly Makau". The purported imposter is using the name "stacy owiti". <[important!]

@/vero---og is using that exact paypal donations url.

So the hosted fundraiser id is 72YZVGLE8BA2S. [The first one this twitter account had was already terminated when I found it]

This portion of the tumblr-tracking redirect on the donation link (captured by hovering over donation link) shows the exact same fundraiser.

I also do have another post that adds on proof they are using multiple accounts as the same person, but that's a reblog comment on an already extremely long and rabbithole-esque post. It's there if you need more, though. Especially if you want to get nitpicky about how the "original" twitter is calling the other a scam: the paypal addresses that have been back and forth between multiple accounts is clearly just the same person reusing and recycling names and accounts.

But hey, at any rate, this is a SCAMMER and if you donate you are losing money to someone who does not need insulin.

#73 75 73 70 65 63 74 #case update #tumblr scam #signal boost #insulin #donations #< yeah please boost this they are not stopping

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alluringjae · 2 years

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sinfully vowed to you - jjh

open your legs, not your bible | sinfully vowed to you

SUMMARY. how far will you go for love? perhaps to the point you’re bound for marriage, but the groom you seek isn’t the one your heart beats for. and desperately, you must gamble everything without regrets.

PAIRING. jaehyun x fem!reader

WORD COUNT. 13.2k

GENRE. loads of angst, fluff, and slice of life at the end | rich bad boy!jaehyun, rich good girl!reader, implied enemies to lovers!au, forbidden romance!au

PLAYLIST. don’t blame me (sped up and reverb) by taylor swift [the main reason of how this story came to be]

WARNINGS. arranged married to a surprise neo, mentions and appearances of more neos, references to and slight bad-mouthing Christianity, one heated argument where 2 of the 10 commandments are recited, mentions and portrayal of manipulative parents, explicit language, petnames, “stop the wedding” shenanigans, mentions of Satan, mentions and potrayals of physical and verbal assault, eloping, allusions to virginity loss and sex, mention of praise kink, tension between rival families, pregnancy ((let me know I missed anything else))

⤑ vero’s words: reposting bc tvmblr being a bit rood for not showing up on the tags 💀 also did some minor edits and added extra parts i forgot from my final draft huhuhu but omg yeah thank you for all the love for the first part!!! i didn’t expect it to blow up my phone notifs soooo i hope this second part (unsure if it’s the last one who knows right) makes up the sudden cliffhanger HAHAHAHA happy reading!!! 💗

⤑ disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. i don’t own the people/characters written, but the plot is mine. translations or copying my work is not allowed.

⤑ masterlist

⤑ leave me some feedback or hellos!

SIX HOURS BEFORE THE WEDDING.

They say a wedding is every little girl’s dream. Whether it was the white gown or having a gorgeous partner at the end of the aisle whom they truly love, it’s like magic unfolding by the eyes of their esteemed guests.

The power of love ever so beautiful, and how everyone anticipates for it to grown each passing. And for the couple, to be eternally bound and in love until their final breath.

You were one of those little girls caught up in the fantasy, until it was tainted by the bitter reality of your pre-constructed future.

Hushed chatter are exchanged between your assigned makeup artist and hair stylist. They express pride in being booked by such an influential family for such a lavish wedding, doing their best to live up to the high expectations. But they’ll never understand how the smiles you give when they loop you into their small talk, it’s an act. Deep down, you dread their fruits of their labor working out.

Yet you wish to stop yourself from changing into this magnificent white gown cascading every curve of your figure. The upper half is of a tube design, folded twice and sewn. As for the bottom, the fabric are crafted into ruffles that flair until the bottom. A veil is clasp on top of your bun, awaiting until the big event to place over your head. Oh, there are gloves to match.

“Keep yourself entirely covered and pure after your wedding vows.” Your mother once insights as you nod along during your first dress fitting back then. Quite ironic to hear that now, huh?

Eventually (and much to your convenience), the overall styling is done. You bid genuine gratitude to the staff before they exit your hotel room while you remain alone to rest up. It was going to be a long day of superficial joy before facing lifelong period of unhappiness and duty.

As much as you want to enjoy your beautiful reflection right by the full-length mirror, your heart cannot simply move past the tragedy and pain strongly throbbing inside you.

What was the point to be dolled up like this if the groom you seek is not the chosen one?

And what more for a wedding being the happiest day of every little girl’s life if your arranged groom already has a special someone vacating their heart?

The outside world can only rejoice for such a joyous occasion, but the two of you can only mourn for the freedoms that have been permanently washed away.

Quite frankly enough, you still remember that very day you met your fiancé. You can only grieve for what has already been done without your willing knowledge and consent…

And for what else is to come after it.

TEN MONTHS BEFORE THE WEDDING.

It’s merely two days after your father’s sudden announcement of marriage, and your groom-to-be reached out to you through your mother. He didn’t have your number, so he contacted her first then you.

Meanwhile, your poor heart remains to sob and cry out every ounce of pain. Yet it never decreased, especially when you still had to tell Jaehyun. But you still didn’t have the bravery, dodging his calls and texts on your burner phone.

For the meantime, you needed to face your groom-to-be in hopes for at least a civil relationship.

The cafe near your office was a good 5 minute walk for him, and out there he already laid out his honest intentions and thoughts.

“I understand what we must do for our families’ empires.” He starts off in a downcast manner. “But do know that affection-wise, I can never reciprocate it with you.”

You curved a mini grin. “What’s she like then?”

“Wait, are you not offended?” He’s taken aback. Nothing has occurred but rejecting any future romantic endeavors to the kindest and most angelic woman in the city. He’s aware of the asshole move, but your reaction is very unlike you.

You laugh, breaking a bit of the tension. “Should I be?”

“We’re set to be married, to fall in love over time. So it’s unfair for you if I can’t give you just that. And my, you deserved to be loved in full.”

You heart wrenches. “But you deserve that just as much as I do because--“

“Because?”

“My heart belongs to another as well.”

Silence floods the both of you. Eye contact is evident, not ignored. Your irises drain of energy, of hope. And yet, there’s a nudge of comfort in sharing burdens together.

The burden of your liberty fading day by dad and impenetrable heartbreak.

And even if Jaehyun doesn’t know it yet, you’re already grieving.

“If not a loving relationship,” He cuts the tension. “May we at least remain amicable? I understand that our fates are shitty, but I cannot find any reasons to hate you.”

“I-I’d like that.” You stutter, glad that one good thing came out of a rather pleasant conversation. “I look forward to putting on a façade for the world with you.”

And as if by magic, your future dons a gummy smile. “Likewise, (Y/N). It’ll be a lot less hellish with you by my side.”

The two of you shake hands to it.

“I truly apologize for my family’s greed, (Y/N).” He says with guilt.

“I apologize for the same thing as well, Doyoung.”

THREE HOURS BEFORE THE WEDDING.

Speaking of the man, your phone pings with a notification. The two of you communicate constantly like close friends, a surprising pro to everything.

DY KIM: My mother is looking for you

DY KIM: She wants a photo of her future mother-in-law

(Y/N) Lee: Ew gross

(Y/N) Lee: How fake can she get this time in liking me

DY KIM: As fake as her beloved nose job

(Y/N) Lee: Jesus Doyoung

DY KIM: HAHAHAHA I’d say hurry once you’re done having some last minute alone time

DY KIM: I really don’t want to be around your parents, especially your over-the-top, conservative mother

(Y/N) Lee: Is she telling you not to meet me rn bc it’s gonna bring us misfortune

(Y/N) Lee: If she is, don’t even bother

(Y/N) Lee: Althoughhhh I do stand by that if you don’t mind

DY KIM: Oh, I see. I’m sorry about that, I didn’t know

(Y/N) Lee: No worries, we have our whole lives to figure more things about each other

DY KIM: such a scary idea

(Y/N) Lee: not as scary as both your parents asking me about our future children

DY KIM: I AM STILL SO SORRY ABOUT THAT

(Y/N) Lee: It’s alright, Doyoung

(Y/N) Lee: That is one of my main duties as your future wife

DY KIM: But I don’t wanna think of that yet

DY KIM: Let’s focus on getting through this show

DY KIM: So I’ll see you in the altar?

(Y/N) Lee: Definitely, see you then.

It’s strange how you and Doyoung managed to create a friendship in the midst of your emotional distresses. Maybe in this lifetime, you’re only destined a marriage out of duty. But out of love? There’s no room for that.

Though perhaps now, you may have given yourself an exception. You share a loving look in the mirror because regardless of the occasion, you’re dressed to the nines. You shall not waste it.

You’re only going to get married once after all, right?

“Miss Lee.” Someone knocks on the bedroom door of your suite. It was one of the wedding planners, whose arms carry a captivating bouquet of white roses.

Your favorite.

“These are lovely!” Your legs carefully rush towards her, hoping not to break your heels. “Are these the flowers I’ll be walking the down aisle with?”

“Yes!” She replies. “In fact, this was a last-minute decision because the original red roses sent by the Kims are a bit too striking to the eye. You should be the main star after all.”

You nod. “If that’s the case, may I know who I sent them?”

“Funny you ask, Ms. Lee.” The planner takes a few steps back, only to return with an enclosed white envelope. “This gift came from an anonymous person, and one of my team members was informed that only you can read the letter it comes.”

Your brows scrunch in suspicion and confusion as you accept the envelope. But before you can question it, the planner interrupts your thoughts. “The car you’ll be riding in to go to the church is arriving soon, so we must head out in a bit.”

“Yes, I got that.” You affirm, trying not to get too caught up on this extra frenzy. Curiosity is a great trait of yours, but it can be problematically uncontrollable at time. “May I just spend a few more minutes to read this letter and touch up on my perfume? This can be from all my brothers.”

“Of course.” With that, the planner bows with respect as she leaves the room and closes the door behind her. Without anymore time to waste, your fingers rip out the envelope whilst enjoying the fresh aroma of the flowers. Straight out of the shop for sure, could all your brothers possibly have the time to buy it?

Taeyong is too occupied with his wife and only son to consider such a request.

Ten, your half-brother, just flew in this morning from Thailand. Staying any longer than today can cause major havoc, especially with your mother.

Mark sucks at being romantic. No wonder he can’t keep any of his ex-girlfriends.

Jeno, well. It’s not his thing. Not with his playboy personality lately.

Haechan is still hungover from partying with his friends just last night according to your sibling group chat.

Yet even with this, you’d still like to give all of them the benefit of the doubt. As the only girl in the Lee family, they respect and love you in their own ways. And it’s your wedding day, for God’s sake. They’re aware of how unhappy you are despite denying such, so sending flowers are their way of cheering you up.

Oh, how wrong you are.

Innocently, you unfolded the letter and bit by bit, your mouth lets out a gasp. The handwriting is all too familiar from the first few words on top, alongside the fresh perfume that was sprayed on it.

It came from the last person you can ever expect. The last person you could think or dream about.

Yet the only person your heart desperately longs for.

You’re gutted, yet you needed to contain yourself.

But fuck, flashbacks of the last time you saw each other replay in your head. And none of them were good memories.

FIVE MONTHS BEFORE THE WEDDING.

Time is crucial in everything you do.

And you knew you fucked up when you kept delaying on telling Jaehyun your wedding when he saw it on today’s major headline in the news.

Here you two were, in your apartment where he manages to sneak in perfectly as always.

But confusion and anger were his driving emotions, and you couldn’t blame him the slightest.

What a coward you are.

“When will you ever stand up for yourself, (Y/N)? When will you call out those people who keep trampling over you?” Those were the first words he expressed, pacing your living room back and forth.

“But these are my parents, Jaehyun!” You tried to stay strong and neutral. You had no choice. “God, I hate them but I can’t lose them. If I do, I lose everyone else.”

“Are you really afraid of losing them or losing the privileges you’ve gained over the years from them?”

“Excuse me?”

“Admit that you are.” He marched forward where you stood. By the window, you’re looking down at the impending traffic. At the cars desperately eager to get home, was this how God saw everyone? Does He watch the suffering of His children in hopes they learn a lesson, or to put them through absolute misery?”

Because nothing else can destroy your heart but Jaehyun’s pain directly speaking at you.

“They’ll remove you from their wills and inheritance, try to blacklist you everywhere, badmouth you to other, rip the whole city apart even to find wherever you are if you run away.” He listed on and on. “How do I know? Because I’m afraid too.”

“Fearing of starting anew, fearing that no one will support you, fearing of what’s to come when you disobey mommy and daddy because you’ve broken Commandment #4.”

“Honor your mother and father.” You responded naturally. How can you not when it’s a major rule you followed all your life?

“But you and I both know that they’re neither deserving of such because they are a lot worthy in the deeper realms of hell.” He spat without care.

“Don’t say that!” You protest.

“But you know I’m right!” And you knew was, but your pride was too high for that. Call it your only sin, one of the seven deadly ones. Truly ironic on your end.

“But it’s not that easy to stray away from my family! Unlike you whose parents give you so much freedom to explore, I am always on a leash.” You try to defend yourself, close to being on the verge of tears. Everything you’ve built with Jaehyun is starting to fall apart. The only person who’s made you feel sane and at ease. But you’re cornered with no choice. “So if I choose to be impulsive, I’ll be trapped. Locked in my bedroom like Rapunzel.”

You distance your glare towards another view, not wanting Jaehyun to see your now falling tears. “And if I run away and fail, my fate can be similar to Taeyong and Ten.”

Memories of Taeyong and Ten being beaten up to a pulp by your father and his henchmen when they tried to expose the corruption of your family to a media news outlet replays your mind. You were still in university, and didn’t mean to see that happening if not for your dying thirst. There was a water dispenser outside your bedroom, and wretched sounds from downstairs piqued your curiosity. Alas, whines from your older brothers as he was punched ruthlessly and bloodily in the living room. Your mother can only cry on the side, merely being a bystander to the abuse because she can’t stop your father.

“But has it crossed your mind that maybe, your brothers not want you to go through what they went through?” Jaehyun tries to compromise. Anything to keep you in his life. “That they too want you to make the big change in the family?”

“Even if they did, I just can’t risk it. Especially as the only woman among my siblings, marriage out of duty is my right.”

“What about us? Our freedom?”

“Freedom for a love like ours…” You trail. “… can only leave us 6 feet under.”

“But aren’t we worth a fight?” He begs. “I know what we signed up for our love likes ours, but shouldn’t we give it a shot? Give us a shot.”

“Jaehyun--“

“Do you not love me enough? Or is it me that loves you more than you?”

“That’s bullshit.”

“Everything that’s happening right now is bullshit because rather than doing what’s right, isn’t pushing through with the wrong?” His temper nearly tramples your room down. Getting a noise complaint right now is the last thing you needed. “Isn’t that contradictory as the good religious girl you are?”

“So you think that I am the bad one here?” You almost scream in stress. “God, I should’ve never given you a chance.”

“Say that again, angel.” Jaehyun’s voice lowered.

Oh shit, you fucked up with your mindless words.

Your lover straightens his back, showcasing his full height. How he hovers you, making you walk back again while he follows. That’s until you hit the wall loud and clear. “I don’t think I can’t hear you clearly.”

“You Jeongs are trouble and always will be. How dumb of me to have been so merciful to sinners like you.”

“That’s not what you said when you kissed me back a lifetime ago.” He plays around your charade. He knows you don’t mean it.

“What makes you think God will take you back?” You challenge.

“If I had to attend mass every day and bathe myself in holy water to clear myself of every remnant of you, so be it.” His hands rake over your body, one landing on your waist and the other planted on the wall near your face. Lowering his stance, your body get goosebumps from the words that he whispers in your ear. “Commandment #9: Thou shall not bear false witness against me.”

You bit your lips, which he makes him smirk. To add, “We all know you’re uttering a lie, baby.”

As his ego inflates, that’s only when your senses return to their normal state. “Get off me.”

“But you’re my religion, baby.”

“Commandment #1: Thou shall have no other Gods before Me.” You retaliated. “Convert back to your old self, Jaehyun. The one before you rejoined Bible study.”

“Baby.”

“It’s blasphemous to describe me as a religion when I am no god. So If you really love me, you’d understand my sense of duty and let me go.” Don’t. Please. You’re at a point of confusion, but you cannot let whatever feelings you have for Jaehyun jeopardize your life. Perhaps these feelings shall pass too.

Right?

“(Y/N).”

“Please don’t make it any harder for us, Jaehyun.” You weakly pushed him away. “So please go.”

Jaehyun’s been the type to rile you up, to take risks. But he knows when enough is enough. As your orbs have been drained of its light, and your back slouched in fatigue, it’s a pain to see you this way.

But the pain that piles in his chest was more superior, and he starts to lash out. Like he’s back in square one with you.

“I loathe your family. You robbed my family all those years ago, so I thought I’d never like you no matter how kind-hearted you are in and outside the church. But I was so fucking wrong.” He starts to cry, which he rarely does. And it’s from the last person he ever expected it to be from. His only lover, the only person who understood him, was leaving him.

“You’re the only one who understood me when everyone turned their backs at me for my sharp tongue. Sure, we argued a lot but you put me in my place. In my cold world, you embraced me with warmth. You taught me how to soften up and make amends with Sungchan, and showed me what real love is unlike the harshness of my parents.” Your back was turned when he kept talking this point on, refusing to confront him more. It’s too much you can mentally and emotionally handle.

“But that doesn’t really matter anymore.” He sighs, giving up. “I fell for your tricks, and now, you robbed my whole heart. How it beats for you, and only you. Truly, robbing runs in your blood and it shall stay that way forever.”

“Jaehyun, wait--” From your cold stance, only now were you awakened by the consequences of your actions. But it was too late. Jaehyun was by your front door, opening it to exit your home.

And your life forever.

“Goodbye, (Y/N).”

TWO HOURS BEFORE THE WEDDING.

Will you ever be ready to read this note when your parting all those months ago was bitter?

Yet it does cross your mind how he’s been, how can you not be?

If this was your last connection to him, you must savor it. All the sweetness and bitterness blazed in it.

Dearest my angel,

Weddings allow you to witness the passion and love between a couple right before your eyes. There’s truly nothing more breathtaking than that.

I am so sorry for the way I acted that night and each word I spat at you. I pressured you into something that you weren’t comfortable with out of my greed, inconsiderate of how much stress you already were under beforehand. Rather than putting you on the spot and lashing out my growing heartbreak, I should’ve been by your side. To be your shoulder to cry on, especially when we know what kind of love if we’re in.

But forgive me and my poor heart: it still cannot accept that you’re betrothed to another. I cannot invalidate my emotions that day either, but regardless. I am sorry for my actions that night.

They say our kind of love is forbidden, disrespectful to our ancestors who loathed each other. But can we really blame our souls to find connection in the mutual pains of our manipulative families? Should we choose to hate our neighbors because they told us to do so, to continue the generational tradition? Damn, we should never be religious if our sense of humanity is fucked.

By this time, you’re already dressed in a fascinating white gown. You’ve always been beautiful, but you’re bound to make every angel above cry in praise as you walk down the aisle. They’ll see what I see in you, even if I’m not the man who gets to take your hand. Until death do us part, but we’ve already parted before we can ever truly begin.

Thank you for accepting me for who I am. Thank you for making me realize how much I’m worth versus the bad things my parents say about me. Thank you for always encouraging me to go after my dreams even when a lot of people has turned their backs on. Most of all, thank you for loving me as I have loved you.

I don’t deserve a space in Heaven, but I am glad I found Heaven in you. And now, I’m ready to step down. Not necessarily to let you go yet, but in time, I’ll be able to let you go and look back at our memories fondly.

So please don’t shed any more tears if I am the cause of them; it aches my heart thinking of it because you deserve all the happiness in the world. Freely live a new life with your groom and create amazing memories with him.

I believe that my purpose in God’s plan for you, which is to love you fully and authentically in this world of lies, has been fulfilled.

- J

“We must leave in 5, (Y/N).” The muffled voice of the planner echoes through your trance, one that has you silently sobbing underneath your lips. Tears that threaten to brim down, but your head shakes before they do so.

What have you done? You became a slave to your cowardice for the longest time, only for your courage to finally knock some sense into you. You simply cannot go through this ceremony, you had to get outta there.

But it was already too late. Life doesn’t wait on cowards like you.

With the white bouquet in hand, your last connection with him, you pull yourself together.

“Alright, I’m ready. Let’s go.”

ONE HOUR BEFORE THE WEDDING.

Pictures here, pictures there.

The ceremony hasn’t started, and yet your parents and Doyoung’s demand numerous shots with you by the hotel and in the church. Your toes start to ache in your heels, and to your side, your eyes beg Taeyong and Ten to save you from your misery.

The latter boy laughs from afar, giving you a thumbs up. Or rather his expression read, “You’re on your own to do your duty!”

Meanwhile, Taeyong cuts in between you having dreaded small talk with Doyoung’s self-righteous mother. Already proud to claim herself as your mother-in-law, your ears can bleed for every screech in her tone when she opens her mouth. Under the excuse of “having some 1-on-1 time with my only sister”, Taeyong escorts you to a quiet, closed room within the church.

“Thank God for you, Yongie.” You hug him with utmost gratitude. “I’m about to lose my mind if Mrs. Kim wouldn’t shut up.”

Taeyong laughs, gladly returning your gesture. “Anything for you, little sis.”

You scoff, correcting him. “Your only sis.”

“You know what I mean.”

The two of you smile at each other, enjoying the comfort of silence. Since you were children studying in your living room back then to the first time Taeyong taught you how to drink when you turn 18, he was like your best friend. Through thick and thin, and against your parents the two of you were. Slowly, you’re breaking the cycle of bad deeds.

Or trying to. Because neither of you got away with your arranged marriages.

Speaking of which…

“So this is really happening, huh?” Taeyong starts as he hands over a bottle of water from the refrigerator behind him. It’s by luck the two of you ended up in the private lounge of the church for esteemed wedding guests. “Are you ready for this lifelong commitment, (Y/N)?”

“I don’t really have a choice, do I?” You say flatly. “You had to go through this as well, but eventually, you began to love your wife so maybe it’ll work for me too.”

“I was very lucky with Minyoung. She’s my soulmate.” He smiles upon the thought of his lover, but it only enables the green monster of envy into your being. “But I don’t think our situations are ever going to be alike.”

You squint a brow from your stance by the window. “What do you mean?”

“I was single when I was arranged to be wed, no person vacating my heart nor had intentions to look for one.” He lingers, locking eyes with you. His bright, wide pupils that can easily read a person, it was like he was analyzing your entire mind and body language. But alas, he already knows a lot more than you can ever imagine.

It only explains how your fingers drastically slip from your bottle, spilling incandescently on the floor. Thankfully, it didn’t break because of the curtain above the wood. You alertly scurry away from the wet zone and lean against the glass bookcase of religious books. Dare not can you look at your brother in the eye, too busy being washed out with shame, guilt, and misery.

“Taeyong, I can explain.”

“What else is there to explain, little sis?” He keeps his composure, unfazed. No anger, no outlash, no negative emotions bubbling his figure. “Other than you’re in love with another man, one you know will cause mayhem when mother and father know of it.”

You want to deny everything he’s blurting out to you. But your sudden reaction is too much of a giveaway, and lying to Taeyong is impossible. Not when he’s best at sneaking around and digging secrets about everyone. Why do you think he figured out that Ten’s your half-brother, not just some exchange student from Thailand during your high school years?

“Of all the men out there, did it really have to be Jeong Jaehyun?” He asks with concern in his tone rather than judgement. It was the first time he utter the man’s name without hatred. Not when he’s someone very dear to you.

“Hush your voice! Someone might hear.” You order, peering at the door. Anyone can walk in, or eavesdrop. Your world has eyes and ears everywhere.

“Just answer the question, (Y/N).” His tone deafens, but his composure hasn’t wavered.

You sigh, gazing downwards while your fingers tightly clutch on your gown. “The heart wants what it wants. And I’m sure that until the end of time, it’ll always long for him.”

Taeyong remains speechless momentarily to calibrate with his thoughts. He’s been hesitant with Jaehyun the second he saw return to church a lifetime ago. Always up to no good, yet never to start a fight because he’s not the type. And luckily, they never crossed paths outside. He recalls how nervous he was upon hearing from the latest gossip (aka your mom) that Jaehyun joined the Bible study as probation for his consistent outside bar fights. You’re a consistent goer, so he can only pray that nothing bad happens to you.

Over the course of time, he witnessed Jaehyun tame down and become more active in church. Rather than be bitchy, he was impressed. Only God can judge people, not him. Yet at the same time, he observed how more laidback you became. You’re firm to your beliefs and faith, but not really the toxic, conservative type to force others that your beliefs were better than yours. It was more like you’ve loosened up strings and allowed to let your hair down, socializing more and trying new things. Perhaps riled your mother up for being “unladylike” at times, yet it didn’t bother you anymore. If you had fun and hurt nobody, how should a conservative mother’s unnecessary opinion affect you?

So now, onto you and Jaehyun.

It took him back when you’d both get in trouble by the nuns for your arguments, earning a scolding from him on the phone because “you’re better than this!” or a similar kind of pep talk. It’s merely enemies to somewhat friends when he thinks of the both of you, especially when you opened up how you came into a compromising understanding with Jaehyun out of maturity.

But the idea of love came rushing as he unintentionally saw the two of you kiss on the second floor of the open church. Jaehyun’s palms were situated on your waist while your arms loop behind the nape of his neck, both of you smiling at every movement your lips made.

The second floor is where the choir stays, and you and Jaehyun were packing up their songbooks post-mass. He showed you the different colors of light being reflected from the stained glass artworks. Specifically the image of the Virgin Mary, it lit up the best before the sunset. The both of you were distracted from such beauty, and eventually towards each other when specks of colored light hit your faces. Caught up in a meaningful moment, a passionate kiss where your bodies are right in front of the big crucifix was followed.

A symbol of showing Him that love had no boundaries or limitations.

A symbol that further enlightened Taeyong on how you’ve both changed.

You and Jaehyun balanced each other out over time, so it should be a no-brainer that this was going to happen. Yet he chose not to say anything about it then because he wanted to hear it from you. It was clearly a private moment too. He could’ve been mad, but he wasn’t.

You’re in love, and it’s real.

However, it’s only leading into a loophole of misery. Arranged marriages are a given in your clan, hence refraining from creating close relationships with the opposite sex. Oh, how you broke that rule ruthlessly.

“Who else knows?” You quiver, self-conscious and vulnerable. Were you not secretive enough? Did the burner phones you and Jaehyun used were actually trackable? Did someone follow you? All sorts of questions cloud your already cluttered brain.

“Ten.” Taeyong bluntly responds, and you stiffened.

As much as you love Ten, any so-called steamy information he gets within his circle he uses it as blackmail just like Taeyong. You would know; you were there when he confronted your father about his affair with his mother. That if he has no place in his empire, he’d expose such a scandal. It’s no question your mother (his step-mother when he got adopted a month after the threat) despises him to the core, a lot more than her disloyal husband.

But before the paranoia can worsen, Taeyong chimes in. “Don’t even think he’ll use it against you. In fact, he’s in favor of such like I am.”

“Wait what?!” Now, you’re confused.

“I know I confronted you at the most wrong time, and my tone this whole time is very vague.” He clarifies, and with every word, he walks toward you. As his clammy hands now holding yours, he fully lets out his main truth. “You have to make a choice, and we know this wedding isn’t the right one.”

“Taeyong, it’s too late.” You beg, utterly weak in his eyes. And how it aches him to see you like this. “He’ll never take me back. Not after he found out about the news.”

“You can never be too sure, so I wholeheartedly think that you need to make a move.” Taeyong’s quick vision spots a growing tear in your lid, wiping it carefully with his index finger. “It’s always been you being a pawn in our parents’ game. But this time, change the direction and claim your power as queen.”

“But our younger brothers…”

“I failed to set a proper example before so please learn from my experiences, (Y/N). Show them that we cannot let ourselves be controlled by our parents.”

Right as you wanted to reply, an impatient set of knocks intrude your now-or-never conversation.

“I’m already annoyed that I wasn’t invited to your heartfelt chat.” Ten’s sarcasm pipes in, which eases the tension surprisingly. “But the wedding starts in 5, and I want to spend some time with the bride as well.”

Taeyong hastily unlocks the door, while you followed behind him. Lo and behold, Ten graces a mischievous smirk as he leans against the door frame. Taeyong pecks your temple a final with a fervent look screaming “time is running” before he runs to assist Jeno refix his necktie.

That leaves you with Ten. With his arms crossed, he first marvels at your beauty.

“My sister, ever so beautiful.” The sweet scent of his parfum whiffs your nostrils, making you hum in comfort and familiarity. Regardless of being half-siblings, you always treated him the same as the rest.

“Thank you for coming. I feared that you wouldn’t after your recent brawl with dad.”

“I’d never let any shitty fight with that monster stop me from see you walk down the aisle. Plus, when are we not fighting?” He jokes, his hands finding the cloth of your veil to help you put it over your head. As per tradition as the beauty of the bride must only be saved by her groom. “But are you really happy to be here?”

Always straight to the point, that was Ten for you. With one brow lifting upwards in question, he continues on. “I’ve always known that you wanted real love, and when you did, you chose not to go through with it.”

“It’s complicated, and you know that.”

“Do I?” He challenges. “You’re in love with a boy who’s part of the rival family. That’s not hard to piece together.”

“How do you even know it’s him we’re talking about?”

“What other guy, excluding us siblings, have you been constantly around with?”

“Doyoung is there.”

“But he came in the picture late. Jaehyun, however--” He lengthens the tension. “He may have gotten on your last nerve numerous times in Bible study, but not when I saw you both have a secret late-night date by the Han River.”

Your eyes widened. Taeyong was right earlier. “Excuse me what?!”

Ten laughs at your shock. “I was trying to easen my hangover from my bar-hopping adventures with our younger brothers that night, but definitely sobered up when I saw you and him giggling over the smallest things by the river.”

“Ten, I—” It was your only public date with him, when no one could ever question or follow your moves. Even managed to convince your parents that you needed fresh air that day after all the stress at the company headquarters.

“Life is too fucking short, (Y/N).” He lays out his advice flatly. No detours, no sweet words. Just the real, harsh truth. “If you don’t make a stand, the regret of it all will kill you.”

PRESENT TIME.

Time can’t spare you a moment to breathe to answer him or deny his intentions. Because the second the wedding planner stressfully calls you over to stand behind the main church doors, all you can focus was this event. This wedding, one that numerous people anticipated. Loads of influential families that are acquainted with your parents filled up every pew, bridesmaids and groomsmen are lining up to enter the church first.

On the other hand, your parents stood each side of you. They beam in excitement, while you try to match them. Everything is for their selfish sake, anyways.

As the doors officially open, harmonious music from the band on the second floor play for everyone’s glee. Couple by couple, flower girl after flower girl, then Doyoung’s youngest cousin as the ring bearer, every single person has their eye on you. How much you’ve grown over the years, the elegance you embody is simply natural and no gown or makeup can compete with that.

Especially your groom, who shares an enchanted gaze at you from afar. And as flawless as he looks in his black suit and tie, the truth-binding words of your older brother resurface your mind. From trying to appreciate the efforts put in making the church a more enamoring location for a wedding, uncontrollable tears grace your visage. You’re glued to the program of this show, and any refusals will be disrespectful.

“Don’t get too emotional now.” Your mother comforts, only thinking that you’re overwhelmed in joy. “It’s only getting better from here.”

Lies.

Only you and Doyoung can truly share the same feeling at this moment. Even if he finds you ever so dashing, he proceeds to mask his own pain with a tight-lipped smile as he watches you walk down the long, flowery aisle. It was a representation of your life together ahead, especially seeing the petals blacken from the dirt. The reality of it all is only hitting you now as your parents hand you over to Doyoung, who directs you to the center. His hands still hold on to your covered ones, keeping up your façade.

“I’m sorry.” He mouths.

“Me too.” You reply.

The first of many. Such a disgrace to the crucifix above, yes. But what else can the two of you do now?

The priest politely greets the two of you before the ceremony officially begins.

The first and second readings ran smoothly, being read by your father and Doyoung’s mother. It’s almost like a typical mass, where the Homily often bores you to the point you wanted to pass out. Even had Doyoung, who sat beside you, worried.

“You look pale.” He comments. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“I’m fine.” You reassure with a genuine smile. “It’s just hot in this church.”

“When has it not been?” He tries to joke, which you actually enjoyed.

Once the short-lived humor died down, you try to refocus your mind on the ongoing Homily. Surprisingly, you finally pick up and find yourself attentive for a change.

“Love is blind, they say. Perhaps, that’s true, as one cannot control how their heart can beat for another one. But there is also this saying: souls don’t meet by accident. Nothing in life is a coincidence: there’s always a reason why they meet. And when they do, it creates magic. They balance each other out in aspects they fall short, but not necessarily complete them. They bring the best sides of them out, yet fully let their vulnerabilities come under the light without fright. Because they know they’ll be protected than reprimanded.”

You’re unsure how restless your pupils became, eager for new perspectives. Maybe you need a fresher view other than the bright altar? If only you had your eye drops with you to alleviate the dryness, you certainly wouldn’t have felt this way.

As you blink once, twice, a couple more times, your eyes begin to feel better from the natural tears they make to lubricating itself. However, little did you realize where you were looking at.

From the altar, your vision went peripheral. By the second floor, right beside the choir, a silhouette stands up from their pew. Arms crossed and wrapping their arms around their blazer, he was rather suspicious. At this point, you’re quite acquainted with every guest present today. To the point that no one is meant to be seat up there unless you’re in the band.

You’re suddenly become aware that the longer you view that shadow, the weirder it’ll look for the guests. Your curiosity can really take you the far places, but often times, you need to be anchored before flying too far to the sun.

Speaking of which, the bright, shining light directly hits on the aforementioned shadow. Almost like a prayer, it heard you so it gave what you pleaded.

And man, you’re stunned by what unraveled before you.

His brown hair is styled upwards with a few strands in front of his forehead. The sleeves of his black dress shirt were folded to his elbows, while his black trousers have minor creases on the bottom hems. His eyebags darkened, showing lack of sleep on his end. However, his orbs greet yours with warmth. A reconnection, as you find it difficult to stray away. Dimples pop out as he smiles your way, fluttering your heart like a young teenager.

Why was it so familiar to you?

But there’s no way this was real, right? Have you started building delusions in your head as a coping mechanism to your upcoming lifelong misery?

You blink and shake your head for reassurance, but as you reopen your eyes, he was gone like magic. Yet his silhouette lingers through your mind. Alongside that, the ending words of the homily seeped through with a vengeance.

Or rather, redemption.

Because for some reason, the silhouette urged your mind to remember Jaehyun.

“The utmost beauty of these souls is how neither of them were looking when they found each other.” Insert the moment when Jaehyun emerges to the Bible study room for the first time 3 years ago. With a sinister grin and stance, he managed to lock strong eye contact on you as you were passing out Bibles to the other kids. How unshaken you were, yet so entranced by him.

“From meeting, in comes the unconditional love they’ll build.” The innocent memories of your relationship with Jaehyun when you started seeing each other romantically dance around your brain.

“In that love, they put effort everyday through the small things.” You’ve always liked white roses, while Jaehyun fancied sweet potato chips. Every getaway you both had, you’ve gifted each other with those items.

“In that love, it’s impenetrable to conquer every battle and fight that stampedes there.” If not your last encounter, there was one time you may have succeeded here. You recall defending Jaehyun from your parents at home when he put you trouble and “trouble” after Bible study. How even if he’s the so-called enemy, he’s a good person relearning what’s right from wrong. How he is not his family.

“And in that same love, it makes them feel at home.” Cue all the imaginative, future plans you and Jaehyun drunkenly made if your love story wasn’t an impossible tale. How you’d leave it up to the multiverse, you both giggled.

“So my brothers and sisters, in every story, these two souls here,” The priest naively refers to you and Doyoung. “It’s not a coincidence. The Lord knew what he was doing. He didn’t create a perfect love, but a love only the bride and groom would ever know and feel. Yet it’s a love He created in His likeness and image because He loves His children, and only bless them with eternal happiness with each other.”

In your parents’ eyes, they saw your future with Doyoung.

In your eyes, the future was set with Jaehyun. Wherever you are, all you can think of in every word the priest spoke.

And that future with him is ever so clear and beautiful…

Holy shit.

This wedding must not push through.

“Kim Doyoung and Lee (Y/N) have invited us to share in this celebration as they affirm their love before us, pledge their faith to one another and enter into the joys and privileges of marriage.” So caught up in your reverie, you’re back to standing up and facing Doyoung. The recitation of vows approaches. “If there is anyone present who can show just cause why these two persons may not be joined in matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

Stillness, much to your parents and Doyoung’s delight.

But now, you could care less about what others think. This needs to stop.

This is your life, and you’re reclaiming it as yours.

You need to run far, far away and find him.

Your real love, Jeong Jaehyun.

And to that, you pray within yourself:

“Oh Lord, save me, my drug is my baby. I'll be usin' for the rest of my life.”

“I can’t do this.” You object boldly, stepping back. “I can’t marry you, Doyoung.”

The audience behind you gasps, the priest and Doyoung especially. “What do you mean, (Y/N)?”

You felt so apologetic for his confusion. “You deserve someone who truly loves you without judgment.”

Your eyes peek over his shoulder to find a woman beside his younger brother Jungwoo quivers at the entire scene. The same woman whom you’ve found out was his first and only love, if not for you asking about her during your first encounter. Yet never did he act on his affections due to the standards of his family, and being the best friend of his brother. He feared of the consequences, but this is no time for fear.

It's time for action. If you’re going to make your move, so should he.

“Fight for your true love. Don’t make them take it away from you.” Your eyes linger momentarily on Doyoung’s real love. “Don’t let them take her away from you, and choose the life where you can be unapologetically and incandescently happy, Doyoung.”

No more words can Doyoung utter towards your plea, but instead lets his daring actions communicate back to you. It was the way his arms looped around her waist, hugging her for dear life. And how she gasped loudly the entire church can hear as she returned his empowering gesture, lacing her arms around his neck.

“I’m sorry, Sejeong.” Doyoung whispers a little too loudly. “It’s you. It’s always been you, and will forever be you I love.”

Not a breath wasted, these two lovers rapidly make their exit through an emergency door of the church. Doyoung utters nothing more to his parents, but expresses disgust and anger at how he glares at them. I’m done with your shit, his eyes read. Oh, how his dear mother cries out for him to come back while his father holds her back. Jungwoo, on the other hand, claps at his brother’s impressive move. He didn’t even bother listening to his father who ordered him to chase after him.

“They’ve always been in love with each other. Who are you to tell me to stop them?”

Meanwhile, time is ticking for you. You’ve had your run at playing matchmaker, now you need to return to your lover. One you can hope will take you back after your cowardice pushed him back to the pits of hell, while you crawled back to your seat in heaven. Although tainted you are, nothing but a few prayers and consistent good deeds will gain favor from Him again.

And so you ran. Heels of your heels click clack the marble aisle as you remove your gloves. Your freed fingers grasp on the fabric on your gown to move arther and farther away from the altar. Guests are even more bewildered by your actions, never expecting you to turn out this way.

“Lee (Y/N)!” Only the frantic voice of your mother halts you. Call it a natural reaction when you’ve grown up under her care, her ever so manipulative and overprotective care.

You huff, turning around. “What is it, mother?”

Only a few meters away from you, her hand hurtfully grips your arm. “Ow!”

“You disgust me.” She spits. “How dare you embarrass our family like this?! Have you no conscience?! Why are you acting like a child?!”

You scoff, annoyed. “I think I should be asking you the questions.”

“Excuse me?!”

You yank your arm away from her sharp fingers. Your posture stands a little taller, which is your way to signify confidence. Bravery from her threats.

“All my life, you dictated my every move. You constructed me into this good, religious good girl image so others can stray away from the corruption of our family businesses. You banned me to make my own choices and live my own life because you solely believe that your and father’s choices are the best ones. You taught me misleading ideals and beliefs, urging me to hate others who don’t resonate with me and abandon those who are lower than me. And now, you attempted to sell my freedom for the price of overflowing greed.”

You blurt out every ounce of pain you’ve gained all your life, finally relieving yourself of the burden. If only you could see the proud expressions your older brothers sport from afar, while your younger brothers can admire your courage. You’re finally taking a stand so neither of them would face a situation like this.

“You are lying!” Your mother tries to fight back, even if her lips quiver. Never would she think her only daughter could turn out like this. “That’s a sin, young lady.”

“But nothing as worse as greed, mom. One of the seven deadly sins, like you once taught me.” You smirk.

“Do not dare talk back to your mother!” Your father joins the heated scene. “What happened to you, (Y/N)? How did you turn out like this?”

You laugh, placing a hand on your chest to hold yourself back. “Your sheltered, devious way of parenting me and my brothers led me here. So much for saying we’re a self-proclaimed “God-centered” family when we are far from th--”

Your outburst is dramatically cut off with a stinging slap from your mother. Your legs give out from the impact as your butt lands flat on the marble. The crowd is in a disarray from the sudden commotion, full from all this information. Information that’ll give every journalist and gossip meals for months.

Meanwhile, all your brothers race to your aid. This has gone too far.

“You’re no longer my daughter, but the daughter of Satan himself.” Your mother rages while your palm covers your reddening cheek. You can only yourself back because physical violence shouldn’t be responded with the same thing. And being Satan’s daughter? So be it. It’s better than being the offspring of your parents.

“If not Doyoung, us, or your brothers, who would ever love and accept your lost, pitiful soul?”

“I would.”

A deep voice sends shivers to your figure. Almost like he’s enraged, you swivel your head to the source like everyone else.

It was none other than the silhouette from earlier, emerging from the darkness of the aisle. Except now, he was no regular silhouette. It embodies more sharpness and tidiness, like prestige and power exalts his bones. Almost like a complete redo.

Speaking of which, what your eyes laid upon prior wasn’t a hallucination. The more light from the church and the sun combined shines through, you managed to piece their appearance.

And how stupid you feel not to have pointed it out. The voice alone should’ve knocked some sense of you, because it was none other than--

“Jaehyun.”

The mentioned man continues to strut out, gradually exposing and making himself known to everyone present today. And it’s without a doubt that the gossip from this event alone can feed a whole country, especially with your father seething from his stance.

“Why is there a Jeong in this immaculate event?” He blames. “Have you not learned from your probation and dare barge in my daughter’s wedding?”

“What wedding, sir?” Jaehyun smirks sinisterly, slowly approaching your feeble figure. “It’s more like I witnessed physical and verbal assault against your daughter. In fact, everyone did. Including the Lord himself.”

“I oughtta-” Your father prepares his fist to meet Jaehyun’s face, if not Taeyong’s swift hand catching it.

“Not today, father. And never.” He throws a death glare at his predecessor.

Simultaneously, Jaehyun’s hands reach out for yours. You wobble for a bit when you get up, but you find your balance. His rage and frustration soften into concern at your overwhelmed state, lifting the veil over your head to cradle your weary face.

“Are you okay, my love?” His palm soothes your aching cheek. “I’m sorry I didn’t save you on time.”

“You--” You start to choke on your words. “You’re here. You came back for me.”

“Of course, I did.” He grins genuinely. “I should’ve never left you like that back then. Not when we needed each other the most.”

Before proper words can leave your scattered mind, your father screams like he witnessed a bloody murder.

“What is the meaning of this?! There’s no way this is the man you love, (Y/N)!” He screams, while your mother faints at the sight.

“Surprise, father.” You smile with mischief. “I fell in love with the so-called enemy, and I shall spend the rest of life eternally with him.”

“I object this union!”

“I don’t fucking care.” You curse without remorse. Sparing a loving glance at your man after, “Fuck you, mother, and everything else in this feud. I am done.”

Angrily, your father nearly charges in front of you and Jaehyun. But you’re spared in a flash if not for Taeyong and Mark pulling him back. Jeno and Haechan, on the other hand, hold on to her before she loses her consciousness again. And also avoid her from hurting you.

Ten calls out both your names from the side. Suddenly, a pair of car keys are thrown at your direction. Jaehyun catches them instantly.

“Save your sweet yet vengeful reunion someplace else and run! Now!”

You’ve completely forgotten how public this wedding was as every person spectate how you take hold of Jaehyun’s hand, leading you to a more private exit of the church. Taking the main doors will spark a frenzy by the paparazzi, and that’s the last thing you need on your agenda.

Now in the parking lot in the back, Jaehyun’s fingers from his free hand click the buttons of Ten’s car keys, One of the cars activates in perfect condition, lights flicking and beeping sonorously. And thank God, it’s right in front of you.

“Motherfucker, it’s a Ferrari.” Jaehyun marvels.

“Jaehyun, we gotta go!” You rush inside the shotgun, conscious of who may find the both of you.

It’s not a surprise that the journalists got ahold of your speeding departure since you have to drive out in front of the church to get away from it. Even if Ten’s windows were tinted so no one can detect who was inside, the guests finally vacated from the building and told their own versions of what unfolded in the supposed Kim-Lee union.

And while the news are brewing and buzzing, you and Jaehyun have absolutely no idea where to drive off to.

“That was insane!” You burst out. The adrenaline rush of it all still raced your veins, while Jaehyun’s attention is firm at the road ahead of him. “I never felt or done anything like this!”

He chuckles as his fingers retract to your hand again, lifting it to kiss the top. “You’ve turned into a bad girl, baby. What are we gonna do about that?”

“Would living a new, happier life for ourselves be the best way to avenge everything they’ve done to us?” You suggest. “I know we’ve been through a lot, but I was no better for letting you walk out like that without a proper fight for our love.”

Jaehyun sighs from the painful memory. “And I understood why you did. I had no right to pressure you into something so drastic when your family has already stressed you out enough.”

“But still!” You acclaim. “You’ve always fought for us, so I should’ve done the same before all of this happened.”

“So, you must truly love me.” Jaehyun attempts to lighten up the mood. Reaching a red light, he tilts his body to face you. Even after being chased down, he remains ever ethereal as beads of sweat rest on his brows and his once-perfectly done hair is crazily tousled.

“If I didn’t, I would’ve never caused a scene especially with God watching us.” You lean a little closer to him, resting both of your hands on his shoulders. If not for the car handle blocking you, you’d be sitting on his lap. “Because He sent you to me as a blessing. Not a curse from the devil, but a blessing who taught me to be brave and never take anyone’s shit.”

“Cursing like this still feels so new to me, baby.” The glimmer in his eyes darken with desire, moving closer to your lips.

“Better get used to it, sweetheart.” Merely inches left, your lips teasingly brush his. “It’s you and me until the end of the time.”

The confidence of your tone was met with the element of surprise when Jaehyun’s lips finally planted on yours. Your sultry yet romantic-filled words put all his senses of haywire, as if you bewitched him with your everlasting charms. Your lips curve into a smile as they part so his tongue can slide in. The taste of his favorite mint candy mellow your nerves down, easing you back to a calmer state of mind.

How you missed his touch.

How you missed his presence.

How you missed him, and everything that goes along with it.

As passionate as your affections are at the moment, it’s only to be interrupted by the loud, irritated honks from the vehicles behind you.

The red light has now turned green.

The two of you can only laugh in embarrassment, like two horny teenagers caught by their headmasters. Yet the youthful energy you both radiate remains. Jaehyun holds your hand again before stepping on the engine, rubbing the sides of your thumb.

“Oh, baby. I’d be more than glad to be sinfully vowed to you.”

5 YEARS LATER.

Jeong Estates and Co. secured the highest rank of top real estate companies within Seoul.

This wouldn’t be made possible if not for Krystal Jeong, second in line at the Jeong family business. One of the Jeong cousins rather. No bitter feelings she felt on getting the job. In fact, she’s more than ecstatic to acclaim the highest position in their clan. As for Sungchan, he just entered law school in high hopes of taking over his mother’s law firm. But only years after taking the bar exam then starting for the bottom up. Often times, he secretly gives his older brother a call on his burner phone or vice versa. No matter what, they are still brothers. Heck, highly urged him to chase after you when he found out the truth behind his older brother’s love for you.

Lee Properties, the real estate company of Lee Corporation, are more focused on expanding their branches across the world. Ranking no longer mattered, as long as the quality of their work constantly. Mark, under the guidance of Taeyong and Ten in the beginning, took over the company. Thanks to the three, they branched out to the US, UK, and Japan. Family-wise, the 5 brothers isolated themselves from their parents since that day. Everything has become business for them. Because they refuse to be associated with people responsible for the almost-downfall of their only sister.

The general feud between families remain unsolved, even after the mayhem of the failed wedding. Although there have been are rumors circulating that the brothers of each family made amends, but nothing has been confirmed. The tension intensified, and no dares to get in their loop.

People who work in media make sure to never put them in the same room for interviews or events. People working in their companies dare not to speak of the enemy company. Anyone who’s within the presence of any family member can only bow their head and pray they don’t get called out.

Most of all, everyone goes silent of the forbidden romance built between their each of their children.

That’s the thing with the Lees and Jeongs: they’re old-money royalty with filthy history. If you get in their way, might as well say goodbye to everything you worked hard for.

That’s how powerful they are.

Yet only two people defied all the odds.

Speaking of them, where do you and Jaehyun stand?

“I’m home!” Jaehyun greets loudly as he opens the door. He drops off his satchel of tools by the doorstep, removing his dirty loafers and switching to house slippers.

“In the kitchen!” You respond. Just in time for dinner, you love how prompt he is.

From behind, warm yet sweaty arms wrap around your waist. He must’ve had a long day, especially when he was gone the moment you woke up. But it’s not much of a worry since you also had a early start that day.

“Smells good here.” Jaehyun’s chin tucks on your shoulder. “What are we having tonight?”

“Homemade ravioli as a gift from Francesca next door,” You continue stirring the aromatic pan. “With tomato sauce made by me.”

“Delicious.” He sniffs. “I missed you.”

You giggle from his short kiss on your cheek. “I missed you too, but you reek off sweat.”

“When am I not?” He teases. “Gotta earn to maintain this roof on top of our heads.”

“Keep that habit up, or someone else here might make me vomit like last time.” Your free hand lowers his hands to the bump of your swelling stomach. Perhaps only now did you believe that there is one when it used to be slightly flatter.

“Speaking of which,” He rubs it gently. “How’s she today? No trouble?”

“Thankfully, no.” You turn the stove off, satisfied with the finished dish. Turning around, your hands situate themselves on your lower back. A new habit since your body has been adjusting to all these new changes. “I’m confident the nausea is subsiding, but now my feet hurt like crazy.”

“My love,” Jaehyun coos, caging you in his arms. “How about I take a quick shower, enjoy this meal you made, then give you a foot massage?”

“Oh yes, that sounds divine.” You hum, pecking his lips. “Now get off me. You seriously stink as fuck.”

So much for your mood swings, Jaehyun chuckles as he makes his way to the bathroom of your master bedroom. You roll your eyes st the playful man while you prepare the dining table. Yet you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Life ever since that crazy day became more peaceful and joyful. Freeing to retake the control you have over your life, whilst sharing it with the man you truly love.

For a couple of months, you and Jaehyun resided in a private cottage somewhere deep in Jeju Island. Only he knew of its existence because he himself built it from the ground up. Formerly in the real estate, he’s always had an interest for architecture. But instead of picking that major in college (because his parents were against it), he studied elsewhere with his own money. It clearly paid off as it gave the two of you the perfect hideaway from all the drama.

And led the most memorable of nights in your shared bedroom, especially you finally confessed your deepest desire of him fully taking your purity away. Sure, virginity is a social construct but you trusted Jaehyun with your life. After everything you’ve been through together, how can you not?

One kiss is all it took before he had you squirming and moaning on his cock, thrusting and hitting your sweet spots. His words of praise in every movement led you one step closer to heave. You see, heaven wasn’t just a place you go to when you die in good spirits. But it can be through a person.

And his name was Jeong Jaehyun.

Physically, your body turned sore the following day. But emotionally, you’re thrilled. He took good care of you like the passionate lover he is, but that’s bare minimum. We shouldn’t celebrate those things, though there’s something unique about it when Jaehyun carrying you to a warm tub and feeding you your favorite homemade meals that very day. To make up for hitting it too hard, he egotistically claims.

But can you blame him?

Exactly.

Later on, the two of you permanently migrated to the countryside area of Italy. Having loved the quiet side of Jeju Island whilst craving a new adventure, Europe took an interest to the both of you. Italy became your top choice if not for having individual traveling experiences there. And how you equally enjoyed its culture and aura.

Thus, you wanted to create more memories together and start anew. And by that, you and him rented an apartment within Tuscany and worked different jobs from your university majors.

From being a business management major, you became an English teacher at the local elementary school. You enjoyed taking care of children, teaching them all new things and encouraging them to be their best selves. There are also times you walk some of them home if their parents cannot fetch them. Holding your hand so they avoid any cars passing by, your heart is full when they obey and tell you all sorts of imaginative tales. You adore their curiosity, and you always make sure to be the best role model you can be.

From majoring in finance, Jaehyun ventured into construction and architecture. He was always hands on, conceptualizing and building all sorts of things for other people’s needs. It’s a plus that he’s always followed an active lifestyle, his muscles making it easier to bring those things to different destinations. The big boss of the business he works for can rely him on him big time, saving money on gas for the moving truck. So it’s no surprises girls attempt to throw themselves at him for his looks and strength. But it’s nothing you worry about.

Because at the end of the day, it’s still you he comes home to you. And makes you come until all the stars of the universe are within your periphery.

With all the money you both earn (and pawning your unnecessary designer items), it eventually becomes enough for two things: building a new house and your wedding.

There’s a piece of land Jaehyun’s boss gifted him as gratitude for expanding his business, which is near one of his beloved vineyards. Since that day, Jaehyun devoted time and effort to build your dream home. With some help with friends he made from work.

It meant sacrificing alone time with him, which did strike an argument or two. But it’s nothing too big you couldn’t resolve. Because you’re both sure that his efforts are going to be worth it.

And how beautiful the final output was. Modern with a rustic feel, there were 3 floors to your entire home. With a patio, there’s also a garden of various flowers and crops you and Jaehyun planted during the construction process. And now, they’re finally coming in full bloom this time around. After that, you can see the various vineyards which trails to the best view of the sunset.

Quite the villa, you two have. It has everyone in town wanting to take a visit whenever they can and how inviting you’d be to all of them for special occasions.

Upon tradition, the whole home was blessed by the priest before you fully moved in. And boy, nothing could hold you back from running through every furnished floor, only to hold and kiss your man for a job well done. But the mood became heated as his hands cup your butt and lifted you up as he lead you to your master bedroom.

Your wedding came shortly after. It was held at a small chapel within Tuscany, with locals you’ve befriended over time, your brothers, and Sungchan.

Yes, they accepted your private invitations and made sure not to disclose this event to anyone back home. Most especially, both of your parents.

You and Jaehyun feared your brothers wouldn’t get along the slightest. Initially, there was tension when you invited them to dinner at your new home. Mark, Haechan, and Ten inspected with Sungchan with suspicion, while the younger boy returns the judgmental loo. Jeno and Taeyong, on the other hand, fell silent as they didn’t want to utter a word at him.

Accepting Jaehyun took a while, so what more with Sungchan? He was outnumbered by your 5 prideful brothers, and based on the tales of your then fiancé, he was a good boy.

“Yah.” It was your sharp voice that cuts the tense air, which was a new experience for everyone. In fact, they’re all getting used to your newfound voice that’ll slice and dice anyone that disrespects you. “If you are all going to act like children, we’ll turn out m like our parents and those before. We’ll never end our feud, and hurt more people we love.”

“Whatever problems you have with each other, sort that shit out right now. Or we can kick you out, where the nearest motel is 4 hours away.”

So yes, you may have threatened them. But it does spark change within both families, especially when Jeno opened up about his interest for the law firm under Lee Corporation. He was in 2nd year of law school that time.

Instead of thinking as competition, Sungchan started up about his life as a freshman because it turns out that they’re studying in same school. Eventually, Mark and Taeyong came around to talk about their hobbies. And as for Haechan and Ten, they were responsible for filling up everyone’s wine glasses until everyone passed out in the living room.

You’re merely lucky how the wedding was still a week and a half away. But mostly, new friendships were made and you’re certain this will cause a major shift in the feud.

And finally, as you and Jaehyun said “I do” and sealed a kiss in front of your loved ones, off to your honeymoon you go. Funded by Taeyong and Ten (which you failed to reject out of embarrassment), you and Jaehyun went to your favorite Italian city: Milan. The both of you spent all the cash they gave to your heart’s content after putting them into your home and wedding, exploring the designer stores and shops of the locals.

With the former, it made you reminisce your younger self. The one who was so naïve to everything while she threw the money from mommy and daddy’s credit cards on bags and clothes. But now, designer items are just items with an esteemed name. Their worth is nothing compared to the culture of the locals back in Tuscany, and the love you continue to grow with Jaehyun.

It’s no wonder that over time, that same love eventually created something magical.

And it came in the form of your unborn child that you fiercely carry. It’s only like yesterday when you and Jaehyun anticipated in your bedroom for the tests you took. This came to be after your period not arriving, the weird food combinations you consume, and your mood swings being out of this world. Or that’s at least what Jaehyun shared, but he can be quite overdramatic at times.

As we return to the present time, you caress your hard tummy that holds so much life. How you feel the smallest flutter of your daughter as she continues to grow or the first time you heard her heart beat in the monitor. It still makes your heart soar when the doctor confirmed the gender of your baby. In a world of boys, another girl just like you made you feel complete. With Jaehyun, he’d have a little girl he can take to all sorts of adventures and dance around with.

Heck, he already made the crib from scratch from his excitement and cleared out one of your guest rooms for the baby. If that doesn’t soften your heart, you didn’t know what will. He’s always had a fondness for kids, especially with your profession. And now, the both of you shall have your own to take care and love.

5 months down, 4 more to go.

You lay on your back on the couch, resting your head by the edge. Your fingers skim through an open book as Jaehyun’s hands work their magic to relieve the constant ache of your feet.

“What matters most are the simple pleasures so abundant that we can all enjoy them...” You read aloud the text of your precious novel. The baby enjoyed being read to, whether it be from your or Jaehyun. Meanwhile, the mentioned man listens along as it is one of his childhood favorites. “Happiness doesn’t lie in the objects we gather around us. To find it, all we need to do is open our ey-”

A strong set of kicks to your gut interrupts your reading, a loud groan leaving your lips. Jaehyun’s alert to help you out, clutching on your stomach as you try to sit upright.

“What happened?” Jaehyun chides. “Are you okay? Is the baby okay?”

“She…” Your eyes begin to well up. “She’s kicking for the first time.”

The baby wildly makes her presence known as she remains persistent in her actions. Stunned, your hands find Jaehyun’s and place them on your stomach. This has never happened to either you, and both of you wanted to treasure the moment.

Your husband keeps quiet upon his amazement in feeling his small feet of his baby girl. He smiles, changing his hand positions to find her in your womb. It’s almost like you’re raising 2 kids.

“That tickles, Jae!” You squeal, readjusting your stance. Back pain is becoming a bitch lately.

“Does it hurt?” His hands stay put in one spot near your belly button, where your daughter enjoyed to play around the most.

You give a tight-lipped smile. “Not really, but now it’s a bit bothersome.”

“Oh no…” He says with worry, head leaning near your tummy to speak to your daughter. “Baby, don’t hurt your mommy. She makes sure you’re strong and well, so be nice, okay?”

You gush from his words. Your mind is elated to create future scenarios of their father-daughter bonding, something you wish you had more of when you were younger. But you know your husband, the family guy he’s become. Because you both made an oath to never become your parents, to be better and wiser.

Finally, the kicks weakened and felt your daughter rest on one corner of your tummy. By this time, she’s fallen asleep. And by her actions, it exhausted you as well as her unofficial punching bag. Jaehyun, who was bound to resume his massaging, catches you yawn and stretch your arms out.

“Tired?” He asks, and you nod.

“I think I’ll continue reading the book tomorrow.” You close your beloved copy of the Little Prince, and pull your feet off from your husband’s lap.

“Wait.” He stops you, standing up before you do.

You quirk a brow. “Yes, babe?”

“There’s no way you’re walking up the stairs with sore feet.” Suddenly, he lifts you off the couch as he carries you bridal style. You shriek with shock, but not loud enough to disturb your baby.

“Jaehyun! Put me down!” He shakes his head. “Am I not heavy? I’m carrying your child after all.”

“Nothing will be heavy enough when it comes to you and our baby.” He reassures. “Now, let’s get both of you to bed, hmm?”

Refusing his advances would be an endless fight, so you concede the moment you nuzzle your head on his chest. Fresh laundry, his scent fills your nostrils. You loved the warmth when he’s close to you like this, nearly dozing off when he walks up the stairs. He was your home, and you don’t ever want to leave him.

Jaehyun, on the other hand, is enamored by you each passing day. He witnessed all your good and bad times, the latter especially as they eventually led to the better days of your shared life. He didn’t want to admit how afraid he was when you two eloped from everyone, but you’ve always known. He didn’t have to tell you because you put in your own efforts to make him feel at bay. That it’s okay to feel vulnerable, that it’s okay to take risks. Because you were both in this together, that’s in the vows you unofficially said back in Jeju Island and reiterated in your actual wedding.

Another thing Jaehyun loved about you was this endless glow when you’re passionate about your job at the school, stand up for yourself, and express true joy from the small, finer things in life. But there came a unique kind glow you embodied since you told him the news of your pregnancy.

It was a major step in any loving relationship, and if there’s anyone he’d experience it with, he’s blessed that it’s with you. Like he once said when you were younger, you are God’s favorite angel.

When he gently lays you down on your side of the bed, catching how your eyelids effortlessly fell down, he kisses your forehead. “Good night, angel.”

As he rests on the opposite side, your hand finds his chest.

“Jae.”

Surprised, he moves to face your side. Your lids may be droopy, but you had extra strength to carress his cheek with the same hand. Under the moonlight from your balcony doors, he looked effortlessly beautiful. Even with some greying hairs on his nape, wrinkles forming in his forehead, and eyebags darkening from his restless nights, your heart is full of love for him. Whether it’s from your hormones acting up or not, that’s never going to change.

He's a representation of your bravery, and how glad you are to take on the challenge to push for your love.

Because in the end, it all worked out like you both wanted.

“Hmm, baby?” His hand cup yours.

“Thank you for not giving up on me.” You place his other hand on your tummy again. “On us.”

“Thank you for fighting for our love, for showing those who doubted us that it has a place in our world.” Jaehyun shares an endearing smile, paving a way for his remarkable dimples. Some things don’t age, like your youthful souls. Ever so daring and adventurous, parenthood doesn’t sound like such a bad idea if it’s two of you embarking on it together.

“Even if it almost earned a punch from my dad?” The once-frightening memory earns a chuckle from both your lips. Little did your younger selves know what they’d face after.

“What can I say? I meant every word I say then, to be put in his place.” He defends. “And you know what else I meant that day?”

“Enlighten me.”

Oh, you can only feel real happiness and gratitude for the man in front of you. He is a man of his word, and proved endlessly with his actions. And he shall continue to do so for the rest of your lives.

“I’d be more than glad to be sinfully vowed to you, (Y/N). Forever and always.”

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flightlessangelwings · 1 year

Text

Trust and Intuition Chapter 4- The Battle

Din Djarin x fem!reader (no use of y/n)

Word count- 3.8k

Warnings- action, canon typical violence, injury, near death, pining, feelings, light angst, protectiveness, happy ending

Notes- We’re at the final chapter of this little story! Thank you all so much to those who read, some for the first time some for the second! Sequels are planned for this story, but it might be a little while before I have time to write them. But thank you for the love on this series!! Enjoy!

To stay up to date on when I post, also follow my update blog and turn on post notifications @flightlessangelwings-updates

The main doors of the grand palace swung open and you led the way down the winding hallways with the Mandalorian and Sion on either side of you. Over your shoulders, you wore a long and elegant cape that closed in the front with ornate buttons and you made yourself look more regal to look the part of a queen. You kept your face stoic, but underneath your facade, you were terrified.

Sion counted the guards as the three of you walked by. “There’s more than we thought,” he said in a hushed tone.

The worry was apparent in his voice, Mando heard it clear as day. He knew that feeling though; it was the same fear he held if anything were to happen to his little green child. It was the worry of a parent. But, Mando also was scared for you as well, something he and Sion had in common.

You swallowed hard, “We just have to hope the others can make it here in time.”

When the three of you reached the doors to the main throne room, the guards looked momentarily shocked; no one at the palace had heard any word from you for several days and some presumed you were dead. They quickly gathered themselves and opened the way for you before they followed close behind. You glanced quickly between your two allies before you stepped through the doorway.

“At least our distraction is working,” Din muttered to you, “All we have to do is hold out long enough for backup to come.”

“I have a bad feeling about this,” you whispered to yourself before you glanced over your shoulder at Din. Taking a deep breath, you led the two men into the throne room.

Vero sat on this elevated throne with two elite guards on either side of him. The rest of the large room was lined with about 20 stormtroopers and droids plus the two guards at the door. A wicked smile grew on his face as you approached him. “My queen has returned,” he rose to his feet as he announced your entrance to the room.

You hid a scowl; you could almost taste the venom in his voice.

He continued, “But isn’t that the Mandalorian that broke into my prison and attacked my guards? And… A wanted rebellion leader?” Blasters pointed towards the three of you at his words. Sion and Mando immediately reached for their own blasters in response, but did not move to fire yet.

“Wait,” you mustered as much authority in your voice as you could, “These two are the ones responsible for bringing me back safe,” you raised your hands, “That isn’t the welcome they deserve for bringing your beloved queen back safely,” you sounded bitter as you looked around the room with a fierce look in your eyes, “I would say that earns a pardon from a grateful King.” Your gaze fell on the king as you waited for him to make his move.

Vero stared you down for a moment and he saw the same anger in your eyes as the last time he saw you in this room. “Of course, of course,” he finally said and motioned for everyone to lower their weapons. You could hear both Mando and Sion breathe a sigh of relief behind you, but this game wasn’t over yet. This was just the first round. All three of you remained tense.

“So tell me,” the king started as he took a step away from his throne towards you, “How did you find your way back home?”

He was baiting you, and you knew it, but all you had to do right now was kill some time until backup arrived. Before you could answer, you heard the Mandalorian’s voice behind you.

“I needed the fugitive to lead me to the queen,” he answered for you when he saw Vero start to get angry with your lack of response.

“It’s true my king,” you supported his lie, and the tension in the room was palpable.

Vero squinted and thought for a moment before he spoke, “I’m happy to have you back my dear. It would be a tragedy to lose my beloved queen.”

“What about the other tragedies you allow to happen on this planet, my king?” you snarled the title at him as if it was an insult.

Vero scoffed, “There are no tragedies here… my queen,” his tone darkend.

“The disappearing children!” you lost your cool, “The troopers that you have on the planet now! This is not what Dria is about, Vero! And I should have done something about it a long time ago.”

Behind you, Sion whispered your name, worried that the situation would escalate.

“Are you threatening me, my queen?” Vero sneered, “You know that I don’t tolerate threats… vigilante. Perhaps I need to teach you a lesson… Do something with you and your friends here like I did with the rest of the pitiful rebels.”

Shock completely took you over and your mouth dropped open at his confession. Angry tears formed in your eyes as Vero laughed at your pain. Before your brain could catch up to your muscles, you flung your cape back, pulled out your blaster and shot the king in the leg in one swift movement. With your cape now open, everyone in the room could now see that you hid the Mandalorian’s child strapped to your chest underneath. Mando took a step forward and grabbed your arm protectively as Sion raised his weapon and pointed it at the nearest group of enemies.

The guards and stormtroopers instantly raised their weapons and pointed at the three of you but did not fire yet. Vero hunched over in pain, but raised one of his hands, “Hold your fire,” he looked up at you and noticed the child, no longer hidden by your cape. His eyes widened, “The child,” he whispered to himself. “I know someone who is looking for you,” he addressed the baby before he gave orders to his subordinates, “Leave the queen and the baby to me. Kill the other two.”

Blasters started to fire on the three of you and Sion immediately started to fire back. Mando kept one hand on your arm still as he pulled his blaster out with the other and covered you and the child. “Get cover,” he ordered as he gave you a push. You wrapped your arms around the child as you ran over to one of the large columns and ducked behind it for cover. Once you had the child safe, you raised your own blaster and helped Mando and Sion take down the crowd of guards.

Sion made his way towards the entrance to take down the droids that guarded the room while Mando combatted the king’s guards. You focused your fire on the middle of the room to cover both of your friends. Mando wasted no time and went after Vero himself after he easily took down the royal guard. The king did not put up much of a fight since he was already injured from your shot at him, and the Mandalorian quickly took him down. He then turned his attention to the rest of the enemies in the room.

Back on the other side, more stormtroops started to pour into the room. Once you noticed, you focused your fire there to cover for Sion. However, you soon had to refocus on yourself as a handful of enemies closed in on you. You holstered your blaster in favor of your batons and fought them off in close combat. The child held on to the straps that held him to your body and watched without fear as you all battled.

“We’re going to be too outnumbered soon!” Sion yelled over the fire as another wave of enemies ran into the room. You took a moment to think, and quickly came up with an idea. You just hoped it would work.

“Hey little guy,” you asked the child as you pulled your blaster back out, “You think you could get the door for us so we don’t get any more uninvited guests?” The child looked up at you with his big eyes before he focused on the large double doors. He raised his little arms and squinted his eyes as he called on his mysterious power to move the doors shut. You could feel the strain his body went through as he was able to push the heavy doors shut. “Thanks, buddy,” you said as you pat him on the head tenderly before you fired a few shots right in the chest of approaching stormtroopers.

The feeling of hope came over you as the tides seemed to have turned. Between Mando, Sion and you, the rest of the enemies started to fall. In your communicator, you could hear the sounds of another battle at the palace doors, and you knew that meant the rest of the resistance fighters found their way in and backup was on its way. You lifted your gaze and met Mando’s from across the room. He gave you a small nod and you smiled in response; you were so close, this was almost over. A shot in your direction made you duck behind a pillar for cover and the Mandalorian quickly took down the shooter.

As the last few enemies fell, you heard Din call your name. You stepped out from behind your nook, “We’re ok,” you were out of breath and your face and arms were bloody and sore, but otherwise you were unhurt. You glanced between him and Sion and you shared a smile with him as all three of you exhaled in relief. Your eyes shifted from him to the Mandalorian across the room and your gaze lingered on him for a few moments.

The sound of rustling at the door drew your attention and the three of you raised your weapons. Since he was the closest, Sion inched towards the door, but relaxed when he heard the sound of the other rebels voices on the other side. You and Din lowered your weapons as he opened the door to let your allies into the room. Smiles adorned everyone’s faces as they scanned the room of fallen Imperials. You turned to face Din again and gazed at him longingly, and you could guess by his body language that his expressions matched yours.

“We did it,” you breathed as you pat the child’s head.

The sense of relief didn’t last long, though.

Movement from the throne caught your eye and you saw a severely injured Vero struggle to get up from the floor. He managed to push himself up enough to raise a blaster right at you. “I’ll take you both out here and now, bitch,” he cursed as he fired a precise shot right at your chest in an attempt to take out both you and the child. Mando’s shoulders and Sion’s face dropped as they both screamed your name and rushed over to you as fast as they could.

You had only milliseconds to react and you quickly wrapped your arms around the child and turned your back to Vero. The shot hit you right in your side and you felt searing pain as you fell to the floor. The only thing that registered in your head was the sound of Din screaming your name.

In a panic, the Mandalorian rushed over to where you and the child fell. As he ran over, he shot Vero right between the eyes, which killed him instantly. “No, no, no, no,” panic laced his voice as he dropped to his knees right next to you.

Your chest barely moved as your breath became more and more shallow. The Mandalorian gently cradled your head and turned you so that you faced up. He then looked down at your midsection where you were hit. Blood oozed out of your side and he could tell the hit was painful… and fatal if nothing was done.

With a cough, you stirred slightly, which drew his attention back to your face. He gazed down at you as your eyes met his vizor. You smiled slightly before you opened your arms to let the child down onto the ground. The way you wrapped yourself around his tiny body saved him as he didn’t have a scratch on him.

“Told you I’d protect him,” your voice was weak but you tried to make yourself laugh through the pain. The child whimpered as he grabbed onto the fabric of Mando’s pants and looked up at him with worry.

“I didn’t mean to sacrifice yourself either,” he choked as he traced his thumb across your cheek.

Breathing became harder for you, but you gathered your strength, “It’s ok Din,” you spoke slowly as you closed your eyes, “It’s ok.” You didn’t regret going up against Vero or using your body to shield the child. It meant that Dira and its people were now free. Your only regret was that you didn’t get more time with the Mandalorian.

The rest of the resistance fighters stood silently near the doorway and watched helplessly. They had won this battle, but there was nothing any of them could do to help you. Sion stood in the front of the pack as they all watched solemnly as one of their own faded away before them. He saved off his own tears as best he could, but a few stubborn ones fell from his eyes as he watched the closest thing to his child fade away before him. And he was helpless to do anything to help you

The child looked at you with sadness in his eyes before he let go of Mando and waddled over to you. He raised his little hand up to your wound and focused all his energy towards your body. The Mandalorian watched as the child pushed his body to the limits to heal your wound.

“Here,” he said to the child as he gave him his hand, “Take my strength.”

He looked up at his caretaker for a moment before he wrapped his small hand around his finger. The child then turned his focus back to your wound and concentrated even harder than before. Mando could feel his strength drain as the child called upon it to revive you. But his pain didn’t matter, and he would give everything he had to save you. He couldn’t lose you.

Mando could see the wound on your side close and the blood started to dry up. Once the child successfully healed you, he slumped down to his knees in exhaustion. The bounty hunter easily caught him and pulled him towards his body to keep him secure. Moments seemed to pass eternally slowly, and he held his breath in anticipation.

You lay still for a few moments before you took in a deep, gasping breath and opened your eyes. Mando could feel silent tears well up in his eyes as he watched you finally wake up. He let out a sigh of relief as he cradled your cheek. Your eyes wandered from the child next to you up to the helmeted figure over your body and you smiled softly.

“Hey kid,” you reached out to the child and gently touched his cheek affectionately before you turned your attention to the Mandalorian. “Din,” you whispered so softly that no one else could hear you speak his real name. As you gazed up at him, you could see his shoulders shake subtly.

“You’re ok,” his voice sounded hoarse, but you could hear the relief in his words. He held onto you with one arm as his other held the child, and everything he could ever need in the entire galaxy lay safe in his embrace.

“They’re ok!” Sion cried out in relief. You could hear cheers behind the Mandalorian as the rest of your allies got the good news. Mando let out a soft laugh as he scooped the child into one of his arms and helped you up to your feet where Sion grabbed you in a tight embrace of relief.

The sun shined bright on the palace and the air felt more fresh than it had in a long time. With the king dead, the rest of the empire loyalists scattered and were less of a threat now. The streets of Dria felt like it breathed a collective sigh of relief. The sun felt brighter, and the atmosphere felt as if a weight had been lifted off the people.

But both you and he knew his time here was limited as he had his own mission, just as you had yours. You were grateful for his help beyond words, and it made your heart sink to think that his time here was at its end. He hid it well under his armor, but Mando felt the exact same way.

You led him towards the landing pad where his ship sat. With the child in his arms, he followed at your side and admired how you looked today. You were dressed more elegantly than Din had ever seen before, complete with a flowing cape and sparkling jewels. You truly looked the part of a queen, and Mando couldn’t help but stare when you weren’t looking. When you reached his ship, you stopped and turned to face him. You both knew this was goodbye, but you each seemed to want to drag it out as long as possible and you stood in a comfortable silence for a moment.

Sion came up behind him and cleared his throat, “I can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve done for us, Mando,” he extended his hand, “You’re welcome here any time.”

“The pleasure is all mine, Sion,” Mando took his hand and shook it firmly.

“Now,” Sion’s face turned more serious, “You better come back… And I better not hear you break her heart,” he motioned to you. When Mando tilted his head, Sion clarified, “You’re a good man, Mando. But a father can always tell that look in his child’s eyes… Even if they’re not a child anymore.”

Mando nodded, “I understand.”

With a warm smile, Sion turned to leave, giving you and the Mandalorian some privacy for you goodbyes.

You cleared your throat before you spoke, “I sent some old maps I could find from the royal archives to your ship so I hope they help,” you paused, “There was a recent rumor of a Mandalorian sheriff on Tattooine. That’s probably your best place to start.”

“Thank you,” he replied with a slight bow of his head. The child cooed as if he wanted to be a part of the conversation as well.

“Thank you Mando, for everything,” your voice broke a little as you were overcome with emotion, “And thank you for saving my life, little guy. I’ll miss you,” you stroked the child’s ear lovingly. He giggled at you as he wrapped his hand around your finger. “Here, take this,” you handed a necklace with a large coin embellished with your symbol to the child, who took it eagerly, “It could come in handy when you’re in a tight spot,” your eyes drifted back to the bounty hunter. “You’ll always have an ally here in Dria.”

Mando watched as the child playfully fiddled with the necklace before he met your gaze, “Thank you,” he paused, “Again,” his tone was light.

You beamed at him before your face dropped, “I wish I could ask you to stay,” you spoke softly as your hand lingered on his arm, “But I know that’s not fair of me to ask.” How cruel the Maker could be sometimes…

“And I know I can’t ask you to come with me,” he responded in a warm tone.

Your eyes lit up as you realized what his words meant. “Could I ask you to come back then?”

That made him laugh, “You can.” He then reached into his pocket and brandished a necklace of his own. It had an elongated skull on it, and you guessed it was something that was very meaningful to him. With one hand, he spread the necklace across his fingers and draped it over your head. “I’ll let you hang on to this until I come back,” he said as it dropped onto your chest.

You looked down and inspected the symbol on the necklace. You felt warmth on your skin as you examined the symbol. A smile graced your face as you fiddled with the necklace. But it only lasted a few moments before your face dropped as a thought weighed down on you.

“Din, I…”

He cut off your thoughts with your name, “Wait,” he cupped your face with his hand and tilted your face to look at him, “Tell me when I come back.”

You only nodded in response. Mando gently pulled your head close to his and leaned into you. His helmeted forehead touched yours and you closed your eyes and rested your hands on his chest as you leaned into his embrace. You let out a heavy sigh as you lost yourself in the moment. In his embrace, you could feel his warmth and affection, and you had no doubt in your mind that you’ll see each other again.

When it was time to pull away, Din did so very reluctantly. He took a minute to study every inch of your face as he kept his hand on you; he did not want to break the connection quite yet. He could see the emotions in your eyes as you looked back at him, and you reached your hand out and softly touched his helmet. He trusted your touch and did not flinch. The child cooed in his arms, and you giggled in response.

With a deep breath, Mando finally pulled back, and with a small bow, he turned and boarded his ship. The child gurgled and tilted his head as if to question why you didn’t follow. “We’ll see her again,” he promised the child as he patted the top of his head.

As he made his way towards the cockpit, Din noticed something. On the weapon rack, there were more weapons than he had before. He stared for a moment as he counted his weapons in his head, and then he realized that right in the middle lay your batons. He let out a short laugh as he felt his skin warm. He looked down at the child again, “We will definitely see her again,” this time he sounded more cheerful. The child cooed happily as Din moved them into the cockpit and took off.

The rush of air lifted your cape and made it flutter as you watched the man who held your heart fly off into the stars.

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