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#until you got bit once? of course you don't. why would you!
accio-victuuri · 2 days
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i just noticed i’ve been v partial lately to zsww fake house and of course our dear lrlg that i forgot about another fake story house 给博肖加点小料bot . the last contribution i posted from them was this — the drawing of them 💋. so for a bit of a catch up, i will share ones from the past dates 2/24, 3/3, 3/26, 4/3, 4/29, 5/21 and 5/29.
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enjoy the goods! ^^ everything here is fake/fiction.
2/24/2024:
I have been losing weight recently, and if I crave meat, I will order takeout like beggar's chicken. Once when the meal arrived, XLS used the disposable plastic gloves provided to tear the chicken, and he got burned. Then he put the thick cloth gloves that came with the meal on the outside of the disposable plastic gloves and tried to grab it. We quickly stopped him, and he realized that he should wear the thick gloves inside and the disposable gloves outside. After eating, he called WLS as usual to report today's diet. He acted like a spoiled child to WLS and said that he was burned. Usually you tear it for him, and he didn't know it would be so hot. He also said that he would not dare to do it next time. Later, XLS told us that he ate chicken when he was losing weight, and WLS even made him hand-torn chicken.
ugh. honestly. these two. forget about peeling shrimps for your s/o! it’s now shredding chicken with your hands and then letting them eat it like that is the key. i swear, WLS really spoils XLS! and i like hearing about him acting like this with WLS.
and a background on what is “beggar’s chicken”
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3/3/2024:
Once when we were staying in a hotel, we entered the elevator from the first floor. A robot came in with us. We pressed the button for floor x. Wls and xls pressed the button for floor x, but the button for another floor in the elevator was also on. Xls saw that no one pressed the button, so he turned off the button for that floor. It turned on again after he pressed it off. Xls continued to press the button, and it turned on again after a while. Wls said, don't press it, it's the robot pressing it. Xls was very quick and pressed it again while listening to Wls. As a result, it didn't light up again this time: Wls was very exaggerated to say that he was awesome. He deserved to be my leader. Even robots have to listen to you.
i have nothing to say here other than they are such dorks. 🙃🙃🙃
3/26/2024:
WLS wanted XLS to call him gege, but XLS refused, so WLS tickled him. XLS had no choice but to quietly call him gege. After that, his face turned red. WLS still wouldn’t let us see it👀………………Don’t believe the fake news
why do i feel like this is real and not a fake story. 😂
4/3/2024:
They had a pair of Crayon Shin-chan toys, similar to the toys we played with when we were kids, which would automatically swing forward by turning a switch. XX was playing with his own toy, and xxx's toy didn't move. XX's toy swung and swung until it came to xxx's toy. The two toys were face to face, eyes to eyes, mouth to mouth, and then XX exclaimed in a very cute way, and XXX laughed along with XX.
even the toys they are playing with are dating 🤦‍♀️
4/29/2024:
For a while, x liked to watch food shows to find delicious snacks, but he was on a diet and couldn't eat too much. Every time he bought a bunch of snacks, he would taste them and share them with us. Some of them were so delicious that he couldn't finish them, so he would send them to w to clean them up. The courier here always knew the delivery address without telling us.
5/21/2024:
xls mistakenly sent a video of himself practicing kettlebells to the group. It was said that it was originally sent to wls.
OH NOOOOOO! what other workout videos is he sending to WYB??? how about post workout selfies??? 👀👀👀👀 XZ, please check who you are sending stuff to!!!!
5/29/2024:
XZ: I think I have dry skin
WYB: Bullshit, you sweat so much
XZ: Oh! I feel that my skin is still dry after applying body lotion recently, am I going to have dry skin?
👩‍🦳: It may not be moisturizing enough, but it will be summer soon, so I don’t need body lotion
👱‍♀️: The whitening one, the one you mentioned last time, I plan to buy the same one
XZ: Oh, that one is actually good
WYB: Is that one particularly fragrant? I touched it, and the smell is exquisite
XZ: It’s none of your business
WYB: I can’t join you at all
the comments on this contribution was mostly about “straight man” yibo 🤣🤣🤣
-END
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w0rmdahl · 24 hours
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the ring girl — MM
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gif ©: magnusedom, mkayoung, ayoedebiris
film: monkey man (2024)
synopsis: tiger's temple never had a ring girl, nor one as straightforward as their first would turn out to be. however, unbeknownst to anyone who'd interacted with her in the workplace, she was no mere ring girl — at least she wouldn't be by the end.
word count: 3.7k
featuring: kid, (oc) ishani, tiger
warnings: (it's monkey man be fr) strong language, misogynistic themes
a/n: pssst! this was originally just an outline for me (similar to 'the beginning' for ilyily) but i wanted to provide backstory b4 i posted anything else for MM! hope you enjoy :)
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he remembered the first time he saw her; the black sheep with her head down as she entered the locker room of the arena, a meager woman compared to the grimy crowd of men housed inside. like a lamb in the lions' den — or tiger's temple, perhaps — eyes would begin to collect on the anomaly in the room and people started to further notice the oddities of the situation, including himself as he peeled off the signature monkey mask. without the latex obstructing his view kid could now see the substantial gashes and bruises along her skin, the determination in her eyes as she walked herself right up to his boss, jaw clenching once he'd noticed her.
"what the fuck are you doing here?"
"you're tiger, is that right?"
the greasy-haired man sneered. "and who the fuck are you?"
kid would slam his locker shut from his place across the room and, though he was all ready to go and rest for the night, he'd linger around to keep an eye on tiger whilst he spoke with the willful woman peering up at him through narrowed eyes.
"you need a ring girl." she said simply — matter-of-fact. "i need a job. maybe we could work something out."
tiger's face would screw up into a look of disbelief as he glanced around the audience surrounding to see the commotion, a mixed reaction from the crowd bringing his attention back to her. he'd mirror her folded arms and cocked brow before responding half as professional and twice as patronizing, utterly unsuspecting of the girls' smile that would follow.
"we don't need a ring girl."
the dark-haired woman almost chuckled. "course you do; why do you think ring girls exist?"
tiger now actually took a moment to ponder her query — the first, not the second. the second was obvious. but that was exactly why he paused; this random girl off the street was opting to be ogled at in a bad part of town just for a job. who knows, maybe it could even bring in new audience members — but his wildest ideas more focused on the limitations of her willingness. how far would she be willing to go for money?
a cagy smile would curl the boss's bitten lips before he laughed and swiped a misplaced hair behind his ear. "you..." he trailed off and shook the deceit from his thoughts, "you've got yourself a deal, there. come back tomorrow at 4 and we'll talk details."
she'd offer a mere nod before beginning to turn, halted by tiger's voice booming off the tile flooring once more. "wait! what the fuck is your name?" the woman casted her sharp gaze over her shoulder when the pseudonym left her mouth.
"ishani."
tiger would then be abandoned to stew in his suspicion about her as she exited the same way she came, leaving the room to erupt in conversations left utterly unheard by kid who'd exited out the back door as soon as ishani was out of sight. by the time he laid down with his eyes on the ceiling fan, the occurrences of the day wholly left his mind, replaced with the abrasive memories that kept his eyes open until the sun rose. and then, just like every day, he would return to the ring once more to be beaten until the crowd was happy — the only difference being the new ring girl wearing half as many clothes as when he'd last seen her and a smile that didn't convince the monkey man one bit.
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the months that followed ishani's arrival took some adjusting to get used to. matches changed, payment changed, tiger changed. at first it was just getting used to a woman being in the building — especially one dressed the way ring girls did. the other men were like starved dogs in overheard conversations that had him keeping a closer eye on them — to the point that he began noticing each and every snide comment that accused of 'not belonging' and weird notes left from a 'secret admirer' on her mirror. it was all tough to stomach even for him so he couldn't begin to imagine how she felt walking home at night.
but then it was the audience that changed. sure, she was booed here and there at the beginning in favor of the actual fighting they'd come to bet on, but after a while she started gaining traction. there were men who'd come only to cheer when she stepped into the ring with that stupid sign, eagerly waiting by the back door until her shift was over to ask for her number or who to bet on next. there was even an incident where a sold-out show for two unpopular fighters was terminated early due to the absence of life in the crowd when ishani wasn't visible, but the important detail to tiger hadn't been the lack of enthusiasm for the actual fight, it was the attention and money he made without the fight.
the locker room became a slaughterhouse by the time tiger started favoring ishani. talks of how 'desirable' she was turned into how pesky she was, perverted smooches turned into arrogant scoffs, and all the while ishani remained totally uninterested in it all. she kept her head down and did what she had to do, which often entailed skimpier outfits than typical or (objectively worse) humoring the sweaty patrons for 900 rupees an hour. either way, she continuously endured the bitter tasks put forth day by day without ever making a fuss until finally, on an evening as regular as any other, she seemed to snap.
it came after an apparently tough day when she walked into the building with her hair tied in a rat's nest at the top of her head and dark circles under her eyes to emphasize the frown creased besides her nostrils. tiger had begun calling out to her as she swung open the door to her personal storage closet and, without uttering a word, slammed the door shut behind her. the peeved man would then look around to see if anyone else had witnessed this variation in her demeanor, naive to the eyes behind the monkey mask watching his every move under a microscope.
she was sour from that point on, the perpetual scornful knitting of her brows evident to anyone who cared to look from the beginning of her shift until the very end. she'd kept her mouth sewn shut the entire day even when tiger called her over before she could change and grab her stuff to leave the vile workplace — even when he'd asked her to 'have a drink' with a customer for another hour — even when said customer spilt his drink down her front. only when kid noticed the grubby hand on her thigh creeping inward did ishani finally release whatever had been caught on her tongue all day, her own drink now being thrown in his face.
"fuck off you worthless pig! keep your dirty dick in your pants and leave me the fuck alone!"
any and all conversations from lingering individuals in the vicinity would cease entirely upon hearing the howl released from the formerly well-mannered ring girl. caught in the sights of her boss and coworker for two entirely different reasons, ishani shot up from her seat to storm off from the man at the table, called after only by tiger as she made her way toward the locker rooms.
"ishani!"
she didn't even glance back at him, continuing her way out of the central arena to leave the bewildered audience behind as she disappeared into the employee-only section of the building. kid would catch himself rushing through any leftover tasks before he could go home with ishani in the forefront of his mind, holding on to the hope that he could run into her before she'd left and offer some sympathy for her day — only to find the locker room entirely empty when he grabbed his bag. with the release of a breath he didn't know he'd been holding, he'd opt instead to simply keep an eye on her tomorrow and make sure she was alright, stepping out the back door with slumped, aching shoulders.
— and then, as he took in a deep breath of the fresh air on the second step, his eyes would be quicker than his mind to notice the figure in his peripheral. by the time he recognized her, ishani's attention was already on him, sitting slumped against the brick wall with a quirked brow at the lanky man on the eroding staircase.
finally, after months of mutual intrigue and accidental eye contact with the other who seemed to be watching when they weren't looking, kid and ishani would interact for the first time with a comfortable breeze between them and hushed voices under the twinkling stars.
"are you okay?" he'd asked sincerely. the wind brushed her hair from her cheeks as she replied, "yeah. all good." and yet, he could've sworn he'd noticed a glum cadence in her words.
"do you want me to call a taxi?"
"it's alright, but thank you." she produced a small smile identical to the other sad grins presented throughout the day. "just waiting for him to go home before i leave."
him — the man at the bar. kid was already leaning on his heel to turn back inside. "i can tell him to leave." he could almost see the rain clouds looming over her head begin to part as her downturned smile grew brighter, unalloyed while her shoulders straightened out.
"i'd appreciate that."
she spoke with the gratitude obvious in her sparkling eyes, and so, with the simple nod of his head, kid would then head back inside to oblige. he'd even go as far as to exit out the front door for his walk home just to make sure the perverse man didn't turn back around, all the while contemplating his limited interactions with the ring girl. unbeknownst to him, this decision would finally grace ishani with the first real smile she'd experienced in a long while, one that remained imprinted all the way home as if to remind herself how to do it.
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the days following this incident would proceed as normal if not for the instances when their eyes caught from across the room once more, a different kind of smile on her lips than the one he’d grown used to. it caught him totally off guard the first time and left him utterly unsure of how to react or respond before she was whisked away by tiger to fulfill another duty in the day. however, by the second honest smile kid had become certain this wasn't just a fluke, mustering the courage and the will to push through the throbbing in his jaw as he replicated her grin. it wasn't nearly as genuine or convincing as ishani's, but it was there, and that's all that really mattered in her eyes.
day by day, little by little, kid and ishani's smile-laced glances would grow friendlier and friendlier despite their lack of communication — even getting to the point where others had begun to notice.
"making after work plans, there, kong?" cobra would snicker as he took a step closer to the beast on the other side of the ring.
"stop talking and hit me."
it wasn't until a little over two weeks after they'd spoken that ishani and the monkey man would be in contact with one another again, finding themselves interacting once more due to a complex work situation;
he was waiting against the wall of tiger’s perpetually locked office door when he’d noticed her enter the locker room — practically barging through the greasy guys with hands balled into fists as she walked right past him and up to tiger's office. she'd knock with heavy knuckles against the chipped oil paint and, after a brief pause, the door would swing open to reveal their hasty-looking employer with an astounded and somewhat irritated expression on his face.
"ishani," tiger hummed with condescension weaved in his tone "i don't suppose this could wait."
she stood her ground with a simple "no," replicating his low octave but without the distain present in her vocal cords. kid swore he could still sense it.
“alright,” their boss sighed and pulled the door open further to let her in. “grab a seat.”
before entering ishani would promptly glance over at the bloody man leaned into the wall beside her, a look of what he could only describe as sympathy creasing her features. this puzzling gesture urged him now to respond the only way he could — the only way they did — and earned her a comforting smile as she started to head inside. the minuscule flash of her grin appeared on her lips for only a second before she then disappeared from his view, completely failing to close the door behind her.
the monkey man wasted only a moment on internal debate before deciding to inch closer to the doorway and listen in, back pressed flat to the wall and eyes forward while he overheard their conversation. she must've left the door open for a reason, right?
"it's like i've told you before,” tiger spoke in an annoyed grumble “that isn't how business works, and that isn't how this is going to work — if it did work like that i'd be the richest person in the world tomorrow, but unfortunately company comes before personnel."
"all i'm asking is for you to stick to your word. i don't expect any favors. just respect."
"respect?" he asks with an exasperated thinness, a scoff caught in his throat. "respect you?"
ishani, on the other hand, is surprisingly calm despite her previous demeanor. “would you break a promise with someone you respect?” tiger finally scoffs.
“what promise, ishani? i never promise anything to anyone — especially not the ring girl with a fake name who prances around for money.”
kid can almost hear the smirk in her voice. “the ring girl whose made you an extra few thousand rupees every night? s’that the one you’re talking about? — because if so, that’s even more of a reason to keep your word.”
there is a beat before tigers response that left the eavesdropping man outside to ponder his own theories of what he was doing during this time. maybe he was pushing his tongue in his cheek to keep his big mouth from saying something he shouldn’t. maybe he was brushing his hair behind his ears as the thought of a cool and collected response. maybe —
“i don’t give hand-outs, ishani.”
on the contrary to his mulling, her answer was immediate. “that is such bullshit, man! you rig every match! how am i asking too much when you make me to stay late every night just to laugh at some sweaty guys' jokes? not to mention the other things you beg me to do. and yet i never complain and i never whine — which is why i asked you last week for my pay today. i need that money today, tiger.”
kids brows would furrow upon hearing this new information. he knew tiger did things under the table, of course, everyone did! most matches were rigged and he did ask ishani to sit with some overzealous customer just about every night, however her emphasis on other things caught his full attention, the implications nearly baring his teeth.
"i can't give you your pay tonight. best i can do is friday."
"friday?" ishani repeats, her volume raised higher than before "it's tuesday, tiger — how am i going to eat tonight? how will i wash my clothes tomorrow? what am i supposed to do until friday?"
"honestly, i don't know, but i believe you'll figure it out. now, i have somewhere to be, so i will see you tomorrow." tiger's annoyance is now outwardly apparent in his voice.
"that's it? i should just go fuck myself then?"
"if that's what you wish to call it, sure; go fuck yourself — now get out of my office."
from around the corner kid can hear a chair screeching as its legs skid against the ground before landing with a thud. then, ishani's swift but heavy footsteps, her face beet red as she exited the office in the same manner as she had arrived. and before kid even has the chance to do or say anything, tiger is peeking his head out to see who else had been looming around to speak with him.
"you come to make demands, too?"
make demands. he noted tiger's verbiage before shaking his head.
"all right, let's get this over with."
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kid would almost hobble out the back door for a cigarette after his match when he’d noticed ishani already two steps ahead, mid-drag as she looked over to see who'd stumbled into her alone time. of course it was the monkey man — who else? she exhaled the smoke before speaking.
"i always feel sorry for kong. looks painful."
her voice seemed so much softer when directed at him, though maybe that was just the foreignness of them actually speaking to one another. kid took a moment to respond while restraining a wince from the shift in weight as he worked down the second step. “don't feel sorry, kong's 'the beast.'" ishani shifted to face him when he arrived at the third.
"is he, though? or is that just how he's made out to be?"
kid would have to pause once more in order to work through what she was saying — what the true meaning was hidden in the ambiguity — and more importantly what he was going to say back. he’d watch her take another drag with her eyes fixed on him, finally making it down to the final step before deciding to mirror her intentional vagueness. “does it matter by this point?”
the warm twinkle in her eyes ran cold upon hearing this response, now more of a troubled glint as she pulled her gaze from his silhouette trudging to lean against the brick. from her peripheral she could see him fishing for something in his pockets and her own free hand would subconsciously slip into hers, the other bringing the menthol back to her lips. “i think so…” she’d trail off, and for a moment, that was that.
and then he was the one to suddenly speak, his tone barely over a whisper after a long exhale of billowing smoke. “can i ask you something?”
“sure.”
“why’d you leave the door open?”
a deceitful smirk graced her lips as she took another drag in what he assumed was an act to postpone her answer. “because.” ishani hummed lowly, “i didn’t want you to think i was soft.”
this took him aback entirely. of all hypotheses he had conjured up over the last two hours to explain her varying demeanor, this was not one of them, didn't even make the list. kid's adams apple bobbed while he swallowed the hesitance in his vocal cords, her gaze returning to his just in time to catch this quirk.
"i don't."
the warmth in her eyes would return again after these words left his mouth, and though she would only smile in that sincere manner she had revealed all those days ago, it felt as though she wanted to say something; the corners of her lips twitching as her eyes flicked between his. how awfully he wished to hear it — her thoughts on his rare transparency — but ishani would remain utterly silent with the grin on her face fighting to show teeth. kid would grow timid quickly under the pressure of her gaze and silence, unintentionally prodding him to abruptly blurt out what he'd been poring over since the moment he'd left tiger's office.
“do you know ‘kings?’ the elite club in uptown mumbai?”
ishani’s brows furrowed as she shook her head. “no, i don’t think so.”
“well…” he took a breath in an attempt to navigate how to go about this, each explanation coming off worse and worse. he looked off to the skyline. “all the wealthy businessmen go there to pay for girls to laugh at their shitty jokes. if anyone could do it..."
there was a beat before her response that left kid out in the cold for the few milliseconds it took her to find what to say, the anxiety in his chest rising until an entirely unfamiliar sound eased his swirling worries, light and harmonious in the night chirping with crickets. he'd glance back over at ishani to find her restraining the giggles emitting from her throat with her pointer on her lips, eyes now looking back up at him as she smiled.
"you trying to pimp me out?"
her apparent delight would grow along with her grin as she watched his face flush with the unsure and somewhat nervous chuckles falling from his split lips. "that is what it sounds like, huh?" he'd look away to ash the dwindling cigarette between his trembling fingers "just wanna help, is all. promise."
ishani turned towards him even more now, inadvertently catching his full and undivided attention, though she simply pressed the butt of her dead cigarette into the brick. "see?" she spoke sweetly — knowingly as she took half a step toward the back door with a vivid twinkle in her eye, "kong's not as bad as people make him out to be."
and with that, she turned, filter in hand as she monitored him all the way to the back door. with her fingertips grazing the rusted handle ishani would offer one last salute towards the monkey man before finally heading back inside, leaving him against the brick to ponder their interactions once more. the absence of her response had his suspicion snowballing on how she'd taken the offer and, with another puff of tobacco, kid found himself accepting her subtle rejection.
— so imagine his shock the next day when he'd exited the kings' kitchen for a breath of fresh air only to find ishani doing the same.
"hey," she'd smile, a familiar glow in her gaze on the dumbfounded man "funny seeing you here."
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broken-spirit101 · 2 days
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Douma - Yandere Alphabet
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A/N: I'm on my knees for this man 🛐 Yandere alphabets are so fun! I haven't written anything smutty before so some of them might not be too awesome. I thought I might do one for Douma since I couldn't find any lol Original alphabet found here.
Warnings: Yandere themes, blood GIFs, murder, torture, abduction (the usual yandere stuff), mentions of NSFW
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Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get? Douma would buy tons of gifts for you every single day. If you want a crown, he'd get it for you! Other than that, expect to get showered in tons of kisses. It can get pretty heated, but Douma is a PLEASER when it comes to you. He would want you to enjoy it as well, so he wouldn't take it too far if you don't want him to. That is until his patience runs out.
Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling? He has no limits. A guy has been glancing or talking to you a bit too much? He's getting murdered in a blink of an eye. However, if someone hurts you, they're probably getting tortured the very day you told him about it. His favorite torture method is to throw that person covered in sweet, sticky honey into a room full of insects like caterpillars, cockroaches, spiders, and other disgusting creatures. The person would get eaten alive slowly, getting stripped of their life gradually but definitely.
Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them? This bitch is cocky. He would be so proud of the fact that you're entirely at his mercy. He's sadistic: he would point out that very fact just to get your pissed-off reaction. Other than that, he would give you the PRINCESS TREATMENT™. Want a garden attached to your room? He's got it made for you within a day. Want a crown? He'll get it delivered to your room within an hour. Heck, want the blue spider lily? He's ordering all his minions to go out to search for it and would actually put in the effort HIMSELF to find it for you. Fuck Muzan, you're way more important.
Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will? It wouldn't be Douma if he didn't. Despite being a pleaser, his patience runs thin. He'll coerce you into doing some... special activities with him, even if you don't want to. He's manipulative and would definitely guilt-trip you.
Exposed: How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling? He would go yandere for you only because you help him feel at least some semblance of emotions, if not more. He's drunk on the feeling of love that only you give him. He wouldn't show his vulnerable emotions like sadness or anger often (which started to sprout after you protested heavily when he initially abducted you). You're his most prized possession.
Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back? Of course, he can be emotionally stupid, despite having observed human emotions for centuries. He would actually not have a clue why you'd protest being abducted despite having all the luxuries he could offer. He would gently try to persuade you to just listen to him and live the lifestyle he offers, telling you that you'd grow to love it. You wouldn't even have to lift a finger! However, if you still oppose him, he will use some force to try to get you to submit to him, starting with just breaking the wrist of your non-dominant hand. See, he's actually considerate!
Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape? Initially, yes. The first couple of attempts of you trying to escape would be amusing to him. It gives prey-predator vibes, and honestly? It turns him on. But not for too long, it would tire him out, because you obviously can't get rid of him. It's pretty cute but annoying.
Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them? The punishments. He's very rough, whether it's breaking your bones or fucking you senseless. It would be torture. He's just showing you the trailer of what would happen if you don't listen to him, at least, that's what he says.
Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling? I doubt he'd care too much about getting married to you. After all, you're already his, so what is the sense of going through a wedding? Starting a family wouldn't be his first priority either if you don't want one. As long as you're with him, he doesn't mind. Oh, yeah, he'd definitely turn you into a demon not too late after abducting you if you already aren't one. Can't afford losing his darling due to some stupid illness or age, can he?
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope? Does he ever even try to hold himself back? He'd get jealous every now and then, not as an overwhelming emotion, but as just a twinge that pricks at his mind whenever he sees you interacting with anyone other than him. The person who's making him jealous would disappear without a trace within a day.
Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling? He's very sweet and clingy when he's with you, believe it or not. Would pretty much whine for you when you deprive him of physical touch. He'd pepper you with kisses to see you blush. Just the sight of it is eye candy to him.
Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling? Love letters? Hell nah. It's just not his thing. Sure, he'd leave you sweet little notes like "I miss you :(" or "You're so pretty, you know that?" in your room every now and then, and it's adorable. His love language consists of physical contact, gifts, and his occasional sweet little gestures.
Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else? Uh, yeah. We all know the answer to that. As I said before, he's going to be whiny and clingy and sweet whenever he's with you, but don't irritate him by doing anything he's forbidden you to do. A different part of his personality would be revealed in that case.
Naughty: How would they punish their darling? :/ don't make me do this. He'd fuck you in the most unholy ways you could think of, like you're some slut or a ragdoll. Would be into exhibitionism. He would fuck you until you're just an incoherently blabbing mess and would gracefully continue to wipe out the followers that would witness the little performance you both put forward for them.
Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling? Your freedom would depend on the ability you have to escape. If you're a demon slayer who can easily overpower his followers to escape, he's caging you in a room with a fucking metal door, him being the only one who's allowed to come in 😭 Expect to be chained even inside your room, if that's the case. If you're an ordinary human, he'd allow some of his trusted followers to let you roam around during the night when he's usually out. Never during the day though, because if you still somehow manage to escape, he wouldn't be able to go after you until the night sets, and by then, you would have covered a fair distance away from him. Other than freedom, he would also control the amount of food you get. If you're being too rebellious, don't expect any meals. He loves the power trip, you being so weak compared to him. A literal asshole.
Patience: How patient are they with their darling? Yeah, don't even get me started on that. Douma would let you off a maximum of 2-3 times if you rebel or just don't consent to the kinky shit he wants to do with you. The 4th time's always the last straw.
Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on? For a considerable time, no. If you manage to escape and he isn't able to find you, he'd cling onto that small string of hope that he would eventually find you. You're always lingering the the backrooms of his mind. If you die, however, he wouldn't be able to move on from you for at least a year or two before he forgets all about the emotions you made him feel that he loved when you were with him.
Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go? He wouldn't regret it at all, no, but he would slightly feel bad about it if you made it clear how much you despise having your freedom taken away. Douma would never return you your freedom until you manage to win his trust fully that you love him and would never expect. The freedom, too, comes with a cost. You'll have a strict curfew like you're some child. If you don't abide by it, don't expect the same amount of freedom for a couple of months.
Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)? Just the feelings that you manage to stem out from somewhere deep within him that's gotten him addicted to you like some drug.
Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves? Confused as fuck. He can't understand why you'd want to go back to your home. He takes good care of you, no? Why would you want to go back to your friends or family? They don't love you like he does. They never can. Just crying or screaming won't get you much of your freedom back. He has a soft spot for you so he'd feel bad, so he gives you some privileges, if possible. However, if you isolate yourself for longer periods, his patience would eventually run out before he'd punish you.
Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere? Not really; his insanity pretty much makes him the perfect definition of a classic yandere, doesn't it?
Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape? It's how stupid he is when it comes to emotions. He's been observing human emotions for centuries, and while he can't connect with them, he can predict how people will react to certain stimuli. However, deeper emotions can't be predicted; they are only understood. Somehow, if you manage to exploit that weakness of his, get him to trust you, and become vulnerable with him using fake emotions, you can regain your freedom after years. It's a long shot, but it could work.
Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling? Yes. Mentally? He's always mentally torturing you in some way. Physically? Only when you piss him off too much.
Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over? He absolutely is down bad. Extremely clingy. He would do anything to make you love him. Just listen to him once, will you? Douma will treat you like the absolute goddess you are.
Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap? He isn't the most patient person ever, as I said before, so about half a year at maximum.
Zenith: Would they ever break their darling? Definitely, if you're protesting a bit too much for his liking. He'll manipulate you to the point where you're begging for his touch. He wants complete control over your mind and body.
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darkaac · 1 month
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literally what's the point
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trainsinanime · 2 months
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I wonder: Do Americans know about american school buses? Not their existence in general, but how they're seen overseas.
Over here, they're one of the symbols of America, on par with the Statue of Liberty, the flag, the Eagle, and well ahead of any chain restaurant you can name. People won't know any US states, but they will know these vehicles.
The thing is, here in Germany, we don't have dedicated school buses. The general idea is that kids go to school on their own. When that's not practical, they're expected to use (and given free tickets for) public transit. Public transit is designed around this requirement; there are many places where there is a bus, and anyone can get on it, but the route and timetable really only makes sense for school children. In case a dedicated school bus is really needed, that's generally subcontracted out, and the lines either use something like a Sprinter Van for smaller routes, or a normal city or interurban bus (often a used one that's a bit older). School trips are normal public transit, or a rented bus, typically a coach or regional bus.
It's not a perfect system, in the past couple of years there's been an epidemic of people bringing their kids to school in their cars instead of letting them walk, which is less than ideal. It is what it is. But building a dedicated network of public transit lines only for students, and building dedicated vehicles only for that, has never occurred to anyone here.
Of course we know about these buses, from movies and such, but they're as foreign here as cacti or pick-up trucks (actually we're seeing more and more of these here) or yellow cabs (all europeans will assume all cabs in the US are yellow until they actually visit).
You do see these buses here at times, because people still generally like the idea of the US, even if they have a lot of issues with a lot of details, and so folks bring them over, along with stretch limos and stuff (also not really a thing here). And of course, if someone goes to all that trouble, they don't do it to haul school kids, they rent it out for city tours or as a party bus or whatever.
So you see these yellow things as a symbol of faraway places, scenic vistas, some vague undefined idea of freedom that doesn't necessarily hold up to any contact with reality, and it's just a huge part of the whole US aesthetic.
And then you go to a student exchange with the US, and you finally get the chance: You yourself get to ride in one of these iconic chrome yellow buses! It looks just like in the movies! You get in, you drive in them a little…
…and you realise they're shit. Just the worst buses in the western world. Terrible suspension. Uncomfortable seats with weirdly high backs (so they don't have to put seatbelts in, they just restrict how far kids can fly in an accident). Everything made out of the cheapest materials. Turns out the reason why the US uses school buses like that instead of normal modern city buses, which the US has, is to save money and because they just hate kids.
And then it hits you why US Americans say "as American as apple pie", a dish that is made and enjoyed literally anywhere in the world, instead of "as American as yellow school buses". Of course the Americans already knew all this. They got tortured by these things forever. It would never occur to them to see this as a symbol of America, it's just a normal part of life for them. It's a symbol of school and school life and sometimes normalcy, and tells us that these actors getting out of it are supposed to be teenagers, nothing more.
But most people in Europe have, of course, never ridden on these buses. So when they see them in movies and TV, that's a giant big yellow signifier that we're not in Hessen or Wallonia or wherever anymore. A symbol of a different world, one that may be at most a once-in-a-lifetime-experience for most people, just like a picture of a tropical beach, Mayan Pyramids, the Great Wall of China, or Hildesheim (there's no reason to go there twice). And I think Americans don't know that, and that's fascinating.
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alastorss · 4 months
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I really enjoyed the "touching Alastor's antlers" fic! Good stuff! I was wondering if I could request reader playing with his hair and braiding it maybe? Thanks for being great! Drink water and eat a snack :p
a/n: hello!! thank you for your kind words ^ ^ i hope you enjoy this fluff!
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
Alastor can't pinpoint when exactly you developed such a strange habit of playing with his hair.
He first noticed it when Angel started giving him funny looks, pointing out the braids in his hair and that they were rather charming. Of course, the Radio Demon was quick to dismiss the star's claims that they suited him.
After that, he began finding little braids in his hair with or without others seeing them first. Like, for example, he would see them when he was dressing in the morning and peering into a mirror. Or other times he would see his reflection in his deep mug of coffee. They were less of a nuisance and more of a mystery than anything.
It had to be your work, surely. No one else would ever think to do something so pointless to him. And if this were some weak attempt to humiliate him in front of his peers, anyone else wouldn't have dared.
However, he never had any real evidence that it was you messing with him.
He should probably do something about it. It would be bad for his reputation if word got out that he kind of liked the delicate work of your fingers.
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
Once he's had enough of the mystery, Alastor decides to catch you in the act.
He turns his back to you on purpose, hogging the blankets as he always does, and pretends to be asleep. And just as he expected, your hands are in his hair less than ten minutes later.
Glaring at the wall, he lets you finish whatever it is you've done to his locks before he suddenly spins around in the bed to face you.
Satisfaction fills him as you yelp, scooting back in the sheets and sitting upright fast as lightning.
"You were awake?!"
Alastor just stares at you with narrow, unamused eyes.
"So it is you!"
You swallow loudly, nervously fidgeting with the blanket as the demon sits up in bed beside you. He scrutinizes your reaction, how shy you look, and his smile softens.
"It helps me sleep," you admit awkwardly. He watches as you fiddle with your fingers, unable to meet his eyes.
Alastor sighs with an exasperated shake of the head. "You simply could have told me, darling. No need to keep such a silly little thing a secret."
You perk up at his words. "You don't mind?"
He minds less than he'd like to admit, really. It also explains why he's been the little spoon so often lately.
"Not at all."
You breathe a slow sigh of relief before you're dragged into his arms. He lets you mess around with his hair that night, too. And he stays up a bit longer until your hands fall limp against the pillow beside his head.
The next day, Angel is surprised to see that the oh-so-feared Overlord has quite a few braids left in his hair.
He decides they suit him after all.
~
taglist: @the-lake-is-calling (send an ask to be added!)
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girlgenius1111 · 1 month
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hallmarks of sisterhood
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putellas!reader. r mediates a fight between her sisters. they don't realize they're tearing her apart in the process. at least, not until they ruin an important night for her. can they make it up to her? fluff & angst.
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Being significantly younger than your sisters, you were the true baby of the family, and were treated as such. You were already a pretty sensitive person, and the overprotective tendencies of the entire family only increased this. You were quite different from both your sisters. Alba was an extrovert, always talking, always laughing, never thinking too hard about anything. Alexia was quieter in public, but always loud at home in an attempt to match Alba’s energy. The competitive gene only seemed to skip you, and you hated conflict. Any type of it. You didn’t like yelling, you didn’t like arguments, and you couldn’t stand when people were mad at you. 
It made sense then, that you’d always been the mitigator between your sisters. They were always fighting growing up, and it took a very small you to break up the fights that the teenage versions of them would get into, often shoving your small body in between theirs and singing a song so loudly they had no choice but to stop arguing. If the singing didn’t work, then you’d cry, and that always worked. 
As you got older, your role changed slightly. You were still the mitigator, but more because you were logical and smart and both of them could normally trust you to be objective. You didn’t really enjoy it, but you hated it more when they weren’t speaking to each other, so you did what you could to resolve their fights easily. 
All of this considered, you were not surprised to catch yourself in an argument between them yet again. This one wasn’t super similar to the others, though, in that it was much more emotionally charged. Both Alexia and Alba seemed angrier at each other than normal, and you didn’t know why. Still, you tried to fix it, as best you could. 
-------
“I cannot believe you, Alba.” Alexia sighed, shaking her head at her other sister. 
“Don’t try to guilt trip me, Ale, this isn’t my fault. I told you before there was a chance I’d have to go to this conference.” Alba shot back.
“You don’t have to go, you are choosing to go. So you can hook up with that coworker you're seeing.” 
Alba flushed red with anger. 
“Let’s calm down, guys,” you began, shifting uncomfortably in your seat in the corner of the sectional. Neither girl paid you any mind. 
“I am going for work, Alexia, I wouldn’t sleep with anyone at a work conference.”
“Oh, yes of course, you’re so above that. You are notorious for not hooking up with people in inappropriate situations Alba, how could I forget. It was only 4 of my teammates you slept with? And how many of my other friends?” 
“You are such a-”
“Stop.” You cut in. “Alexia, that was mean. Alba, she’s just disappointed because she was looking forward to spending time with everyone.” You cut in, trying to cool the rising temperature of the room. 
“No, I am disappointed because we made a commitment to do this for Mami and now she’s backing out. Like always.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Alba scoffed. 
“The last trip to Ibiza. Mother’s day last year. My 25th birthday,” Alexia began to list, counting the events off on her fingers rather condescending. 
“Guys, please calm down.” You attempted. 
“Will you ever get over me missing your 25th birthday? Or are you going to have it engraved on your tombstone? ‘My sister missed my birthday once and I never shut up about it.’” Alba yelled, getting to her feet and walking closer to where Alexia was sitting at the kitchen counter. 
When Alexia rose to meet her, you stood nervously, too, moving a bit closer. “Why don’t we all stay seated?” You tried. 
Both of them continued to ignore you, as if you weren’t even there. “That is not the point, Alba.” 
“No, Ale, the point is that only your career is important. Everyone has to drop everything for football, but what I do doesn’t matter, and I have to bend over backwards to make things work with your insane schedule. The world doesn’t revolve around you, Alexia.”
“Oh my god, Alba. You are such a bitch.” Alexia sighed, rolling her eyes in a way she knew would make the younger girl furious.  
“You are the bitch, Alexia. A selfish, bossy, mean bitch,” Alba yelled, crossing her arms and taking a step closer to the older girl. 
“Alba, I swear to god,” Alexia threw back, the volume of her voice making you flinch. You stepped in between them, forcing them to both back up a bit. 
“Please stop shouting.” You pleaded, looking between them. Both of them turned to you, annoyed.
“Go somewhere else if it’s bothering you, pequeña! Adults argue. Grow up.” Alexia yelled, sending a glare your way. You stopped back, blinking away tears, looking incredibly hurt. Alexia sighed. “Sorry, nena, I didn’t mean-” 
It was too late, though, you were pushing past her towards the door of her house. “No, whatever. I’ll go. Solve your argument by yourselves for once.” You snapped. 
“Nice job, Ale, you made the el bebe cry.” Alba said mockingly. 
“Shut your mouth, Alba. Pequeña, come back,” Alexia called, but the door was already slamming shut behind you. 
You wiped at your eyes furiously, getting into your car. You’d always hated how sensitive you were, how anyone raising their voice at you made you cry. You couldn’t argue, couldn’t disagree without dissolving into tears. Normally, angry tears. You’d always been like this, and your sisters often made fun of it, but were aware of the fact that you hated yelling, and tried to avoid doing so. Even when they were fighting with each other. Today got too out of control, though, both of them taking this specific issue very seriously. 
They’d have to figure it out themselves, this time. You were done with this. They knew how you felt about conflict, and yet they always put you in the middle. It was exhausting and hurtful being caught in between them. They were adults, they could solve this argument. 
You and Eli didn’t live far from Alexia, and you reached home before you were really ready to. You needed to erase all evidence of your tears from your face before heading inside, because Eli could not know about this. You and your sisters did not tell on each other, for one thing. For another, there was a possibility the trip in question could be rescheduled and you didn’t want to ruin the surprise. 
You checked your face in the mirror, took a deep breath, denied Alexia’s phone call, and headed inside, prepared to pretend that nothing was wrong. 
------
You got past your mother with very few questions asked, as she was distracted reading over Alexia’s new Nike contracts. Your sister still had Eli read all her contracts, a habit you and Alba teased her about often. 
Eli did come knocking, though, only a few hours later, while you were in your room getting some homework done. “Nena?” She called from the hallway, not hearing a response to her knock. 
Still, you didn’t say anything, so she pushed the door open, only to find you asleep at your desk, your head resting on a pile of photographs, your computer opened up to photoshop. A black and white photo of your sister at training was pulled up, and Eli quickly averted her eyes, knowing very well she wasn’t supposed to see this particular assignment until you were done.
“Mija,” Eli said, covering her eyes as she heard you stir. “Go to bed, it’s late, and you are exhausted.” 
“Do not look, Mami!” You cried, sitting up completely and quickly flipping everything over and shutting your computer. 
“I’m not!” Eli replied, laughing at how secretive you were about these photos. 
“Okay, everything is away.” You said, standing to give your mother a hug before getting into bed. She squeezed you tight, as she always did, kissing your cheek before letting go. 
“Goodnight,” she said, giving you a kind smile. 
“Goodnight mami,” you replied, knowing she was smiling because she knew you were about to get back on your computer as soon as she left the room. 
“Oh, do you know why your sister’s are fighting? I texted the groupchat with them, and they both replied to me separately.” Eli asked with an eye roll, quite used to your sisters’ antics. 
“Something dumb, probably.” You said with an unconvincing laugh. Your mother gave you a weird look, like she didn't believe you, but didn’t push it. 
As soon as she was out of the room, you were, in fact, back on your computer, finishing up the final touches on a photo of Alexia. You were really too excited to be preoccupied with your sisters at the moment. You were in school studying photography, and after a recent exhibition at your school, a gallery in Barcelona had reached out and asked you to shoot a series for them to display. They’d given you full creative control, which was an insane amount of trust to put into a 20 year old, and you were determined not to mess it up. 
If that meant staying up late making sure every photo was perfect in the next couple days, so be it. You were proud of this work, and that wasn’t really a common feeling for you. You’d grown up in the shadow of your two sisters. Alexia was the best female footballer in the world, and Alba was… Alba. Everyone loved her. Nothing you ever did seemed to really make anyone pay attention, except for your Mami. Eli had always been careful to celebrate your and Alba’s accomplishments, like she celebrated Alexia’s, even if they weren’t of the same magnitude. Your sisters were a bit better than the rest of your family and friends, paying attention to what you did, but it always felt a bit like your mother was making them do so. 
This was your chance to do something impressive of your own. Something that everyone could understand, everyone could be impressed by. It was an opportunity you were not about to waste. You didn’t realize the potential that other people had, though, to ruin it for you. 
------
The next few days were busy. When you weren’t working on your photos, making sure they were perfectly edited and printed properly, you were worrying about what people would think about them. Or you were trying to pick the perfect outfit for Saturday evening, the opening of the gallery. There wasn’t a ton of time for you to respond to Alexia’s repetitive apologies, or to Alba’s pleading for you to be on her side. It was annoying, really, that during such an important and stressful week, they couldn’t leave you out of their argument. 
You finally had enough on Friday, pulling up the groupchat with both of them in it, and sending a rather harsh message. It wasn’t like you to be harsh and snap at them, and you were hoping they would get the message that they’d upset you, and you wanted to be left out of this. 
If one of you texts me one more time about this idiotic fight, I am going to tell Mami that it was you two who dented her car, not the neighbor backing into it. I am so tired of being pulled into the middle of this. Both of you apologize to each other for being mean, and get over it. 
You hoped that would be the end of it. When your phone buzzed a few minutes later, though, you knew that had been a naive hope. 
Alexia had responded first. 
It should not be hard to pick a side when I am right, nena.
Alba responded after that. 
You always let Alexia get away with things you’d yell at me about. You can both apologize to me when you are ready.
You weren’t really sure how Alba had decided that you’d sided with Alexia, but you certainly were not going to be apologizing to her anytime soon. You left them both on read, figuring they’d make up before the gallery opening tomorrow night.
-------
You were up pretty much the entire night before the gallery. This time, not because anything needed to get done, but because you were nervous. You were thinking about everything that could possibly go wrong. By the time morning rolled around, you slept for maybe a couple hours, and created a decisive list of every bad thing that could happen today. 
You actually hadn’t thought of everything, but you wouldn’t know that until later. 
You’d passed out just as the sun had started to rise, and Eli came in to wake you up only a few hours later. 
“Nena, despierta,” she said softly, setting down a mug of coffee on your nightstand and shaking your shoulder. 
You bolted upright in bed, and looked around frantically, startling your mother. “Am I late?!” You gasped, moving to get out of your bed as fast as possible. 
“No, no, you aren’t late. It is only 11. Relax, mija, everything is okay.” Eli soothed, gently pushing you back down onto the bed. 
You let out a relieved sigh, rubbing at your face with your hands. “Sorry.” 
“Did you sleep at all?” Eli asked with a disapproving look. 
“Not much. I tried, I swear, I just couldn’t turn my brain off.” 
Your mother patted your cheek reassuringly. “You’re almost done, nena. It’s all going to go perfectly.” 
You nodded, trying to believe her words. You just had this weird, nagging feeling that something was going to go wrong. There wasn’t time to focus  on this feeling, though, no matter how much you wanted to. There was simply too much to be done. Accepting the hug your mother offered, you got up, ready to prepare yourself for the long day ahead.
-------
You didn’t really think anything of it when you didn’t see either of your sisters right away. You were busy greeting other people, family and friends. Some of Alexia’s teammates had made it, and you spent some time taking in the awestruck expression on Mapi’s face when she saw the singular photo of her included. 
That was the best part of the whole thing, you decided. Getting to see everyone’s reactions to seeing themselves up on the wall. 
The theme was people you loved, in their happy place. The project was joyful and fun, radiating happiness. Looking at the photos made you smile, and you were glad to see that everyone seemed to have the same reaction as they took their time looking at each image. 
You had Mapi giggling at something Ingrid had said, a candid taken after a Barça game. Ingrid was smiling back at her, like making her girlfriend laugh was the only thing she wanted to do for the rest of her life. 
You had your Mami, sitting in the stands of one of Alexia’s games, looking on with pride all over her face. You had her pinching Alba’s cheek, a fond smile on her face as your sister said something that was, no doubt, ridiculous. 
You had your aunts and your uncles around the dinner table, all laughing hysterically. 
You had your friends at the beach, all lounging and staring out into the ocean, looking peaceful. 
You had your best friend sitting in the driver's seat of her car, singing along passionately to her favorite song. 
More than anyone else, though, you had your sisters. 
Alexia preparing to take a penalty, determined. Celebrating with her teammates after a goal. Cheekily blowing a kiss to Olga in the stands. Smiling proudly at Vicki after an impressive goal. Proudly wearing the captain’s armband in front of a completely sold out stadium. Leaned against Olga on the couch after a movie night, out cold. She was completely peaceful, with Olga looking down at her adoringly. 
You had Alba at the school where she taught. Candids of her face, when one of her students got the answer right, or made her laugh. With her dog, holding him up at the aquarium, eye level with one of the dolphins. You had her watching Alexia play, too, a grin on her face that you were sure she was unaware of. Your favorite of Alba was a photo you’d taken in your Mami’s kitchen, while she’d been baking. Alba was sneaking a taste of the cake batter, and you’d captured her mid-wink, giving the camera a smile while Eli’s back was turned to her. 
They hadn’t seen any of these photos; you’d almost gone crazy not showing them, and not giving in to them when they begged to see.
 You’d finally managed to break away from a crowd of your friends, having a moment to yourself, when you realized that you still hadn’t seen your sisters yet. Ale’s teammates were here. Some of Alba’s friends were here. The whole family was here. You checked your watch, a frown on your face, seeing that they were both already over a half hour late, which was unlike both of them. It was only when you saw Olga looking up at one of the photos she was pictured in, all by herself, that you really got a sinking feeling in your stomach. She was talking to Irene when you walked over and interrupted, gently pulling Olga away from the conversation. 
“Where is Ale? Is she coming late?” You asked, confused by the sad look on Olga’s face. 
“No, nena, I’m sorry. She didn’t want to see Alba, so she decided not to come. I tried to convince her to, but she didn’t listen.” Olga said delicately. You looked like you’d been hit across the face, honestly, and Olga wanted nothing more than to march home and drag Alexia over here, but she knew better to try to convince the blonde to do something she had decided she wouldn’t. “She said she texted you?” 
You pulled your phone out, taking a deep breath when you saw almost identical texts from both of your sisters. 
Can’t make it tonight. I’ll come see it another time. Good luck! 
Sorry, hermanita, I can’t come tonight. Love you.
You had been so excited for them to see their pictures. There was a little note up on the wall, too, a statement thanking everyone for coming. In it, you mentioned being excited to allow your sisters to finally see the photos, as they’d been begging to for a while now. And they hadn’t come. 
A wave of embarrassment washed over you, your cheeks flushing red. You were angry, too, but you blinked your tears back, looking up at Olga and trying to look more put together than you felt. 
“No Alba either.” You said, your voice cracking slightly. 
“Oh, nena, I am so sorry.” Olga whispered, pulling you into a tight hug. It was too soft, and too comforting. You pulled away rapidly, shaking your head. 
“It’s fine. I don’t care.” You said, cutting the brunette off before she could say anything else. “I have to go talk to someone, thank you for coming, Olga.” 
You rushed away from your sister’s girlfriend, focusing on taking deep breaths. You couldn’t be sad, not right now. So many people had come here to celebrate you and your work, and you weren’t going to ruin it. You could be upset later. It was almost excruciating, pretending that you weren’t upset that your sisters hadn't come, but you managed it. You kept up a pretty good façade for the rest of the evening, even when you saw Olga speaking in hushed voices to Irene and Mapi, even when everyone kept asking where Ale and Alba were. You held it together. Because you, unlike them, could pretend that nothing was wrong for the sake of others. 
-------
Your mother knew you better than anyone. You should have been thrilled, ecstatic. Everything had gone so well. Your photos had been a hit, the owners of the gallery had been thrilled. She realized neither of her other daughters had shown up, but she assumed they had talked that through with you. She wasn’t sure what was wrong with you, but when you declined going out with some of your friends as the night came to an end, Eli knew something wasn’t right. 
She had every intention of letting you come to her, but you weren’t talking. As everyone began to file out of the gallery, saying their final goodbyes, Eli overheard you tell your friends you were going to go home because you were tired. You didn't say a single word to her aside from telling her that you’d see her at home, before you practically fled the building, heading for your car. She didn’t couldn’t imagine what was wrong, never expecting her daughters to have done what they did. Eli didn’t even think of them being a possible reason as to why you were upset. Mapi pulled her aside, though, before she could go after you, an infuriated look on her face. 
“Do you know what your daughters have done?” She asked quietly. 
Eli frowned. “No. What have they done?” 
Mapi shook her head. “They both bailed on tonight over text to pequeña. They are in some stupid fight that they’ve put her in the middle of, and they didn’t want to see each other, so they didn’t come.” 
Suddenly, Eli was quite furious at her eldest daughters. There would be hell to pay, she’d make sure of it. How could they be so selfish, and ruin your night like this? You’d been almost beside yourself for weeks about this night, and she knew the people you wanted to impress most were your sisters. And they hadn’t come. Before she yelled at them, though, she needed to go home to you, because she was very sure that you weren’t okay. Your odd behavior made sense, now, and Eli’s heart ached at the thought of you driving all by yourself while you were so upset. 
“I will deal with them.” Eli said quietly. “Thank you for telling me, María, and for coming. It meant a lot to her.” 
Mapi smiled sympathetically. “Of course. Let me know if you need help kicking some Putellas ass.” 
Eli chuckled. “I will.” 
She set off to her car after that, ignoring Alexia’s numerous phone calls. Likely, Olga had arrived home and laid into her for not coming, and Alexia was looking to be let off the hook from her Mami that she hadn’t messed up that badly. Eli wouldn’t be doing that. 
-------
You didn’t make it far into the house. In your new dress, one that was reminiscent of the dress Alexia had worn to win her first balon d’or, you’d collapsed onto the couch, harsh sobs ripping their way out of your chest. You cried until your makeup ran and your chest hurt. Until your Mami arrived home, rushing through the door, her heart breaking when she saw the state you were in. Eli was by your side instantly, pulling you into her arms. It was rare that a hug from your mother didn’t make you feel better, but this was the case today. You weren’t really sure that anything would help, but you still buried yourself into your Mami’s arms, wishing more than anything that she could fix this for you. 
“They didn’t come, Mami,” you sobbed. 
“I know, mija, I am so sorry.” 
“Am I not more important than their stupid fight?” You asked, looking up at your mother with a devastated expression on your face. “I was so excited for them to see, I just wanted them to be proud of me.” 
Eli felt anger fill her at a level she’d never quite felt before. “I am proud of you, cariño, so proud of you. It’s all going to be okay, I promise. Everything is going to be fine.” She soothed, running her hand through your hair, shushing you softly. Her fury would have to wait, until you stopped crying. Eli would always put you first when you needed it, even if your sisters didn’t. 
-------
It was late by the time you’d stopped crying and headed up to bed. With a soft goodnight to your Mami, you’d slumped upstairs, barely changing into your pajamas before you collapsed into your bed, absolutely exhausted. Being disappointed was tiring, apparently. And you were more disappointed than you’d ever been in your life. 
Downstairs, Eli waited until she heard your door shut before she pulled her phone out, returning one of the 15 missed calls from her eldest daughter. Alexia picked up quickly, her voice dripping with guilt.
“Mami, I-”
“No. Do not try to explain yourself. You and Alba have done a terrible thing, Alexia. I am not sure how you will make it up to your sister, but you will. You will figure out how to fix it, you will apologize, you will mean it.” 
“Sí, Mami.” Alexia said, her voice small like when she used to get scolded for kicking the football in the house or holding the tv remote high out of her sisters’ reach. 
“I am so disappointed, Alexia. In you and Alba both.”
“I know, Mami.” Alexia replied, blinking hard to fight off her tears. “I’ll fix it, Al and I will fix it.” 
“You will. Goodnight, Alexia. I love you.” Eli was furious, but she’d always say it, always make sure her daughters knew how loved they were. 
“I love you too Mami,” the blonde choked out, feeling worse about this than she’d ever felt about anything in her entire life. 
Eli called Alba next, who was significantly more clueless about the situation. Neither had known the other wasn’t going, but it was beyond your mother how either of her daughters could have underestimated how important to you this night was. Alba was in tears, like Alexia, by the end of the call, also promising her mother she’d fix it. 
Eli knew the level of guilt Alexia and Alba must have been feeling at the moment, considering how protective they were of you. They never wanted you to be hurt, but you were. And they were the reason why. As she checked on you, ensuring you were asleep, she knew that her older daughters would go to the ends of the earth to make this up to you. 
--------
Alba was sitting on her couch, willing herself to be the bigger person and pick up the phone to call Alexia, when she heard a knock at the door. The brunette knew who was there before she pulled it open, not flinching when her older sister was standing on her front porch. 
Alexia had a drink carrier in one hand, and two bags in the other, giving Alba an unreadable look. “Can I come in?” 
Alba nodded, stepping aside to let her sister in. The blonde headed for the living room, setting the coffees down, and grabbing hers out of the holder. Alba grabbed the other, noting that it was her favorite coffee, and her favorite breakfast pastry, from her favorite bakery. A bakery Alexia didn’t particularly like, but had clearly stopped at just for Alba. 
It was a peace offering. One that Alba took, grabbing the coffee and the pastry, sitting on the couch next to her sister in a much less tense silence. They made up in the way only sister’s could, with no words necessary for either of them to know that the other was sorry for what had been said. 
“We fucked up.” Alexia said after a minute, glancing at her sister. 
“We really did.” Alba replied. 
“We have to fix it.” Alexia declared. 
“We really do.” Alba agreed. 
“Are you going to keep agreeing with me, or are you going to come up with a solution here?” 
“As the one who started the fight that led to us letting our sister down, I think it should be you who solves the problem, Alexia.” Alba retorted, a smirk on her face. 
Her sister shook her head, shoving the brunette’s shoulder lightly. “You are supposed to be the smart one, hermana. Get thinking.” 
“New car?” 
“New house?”
“Can we buy her a country?”
They broke into laughter, the tension completely gone from the room, before they really got brainstorming. They were a good team when they weren’t fighting, and it wasn’t long before they’d come up with something that they hoped would make up for their horrible behavior. 
-------
The minute you saw Alexia’s car pull into the driveway from your spot on the couch, you were standing up, prepared to flee the room. You’d known this would happen at some point today, but you weren’t ready to see them. You felt so humiliated and so neglected, you were sure that seeing them would have you in tears, and you didn’t really want to show that emotion in front of them. Not now, not when they were the reason you were so upset. 
You knew how important family was to your mother, though, and you knew that if she told you to stay and talk to them, you would. Looking at her cautiously, you took in the wary expression on her face. 
“Do you want to hear them out, mija?” Eli asked gently. 
“No. I don’t want to see them right now. Please don’t make me.” You begged. 
“I won’t make you do anything. Go upstairs, I’ll tell you when they’re gone.” Eli sighed, and with her permission, you practically sprinted up the stairs to your room, closing and locking the door behind you. 
Your older sisters walked through the doors to the house like they were afraid of what awaited them inside, and it seems that they should have been. Eli stood from her chair, walking over to them, looking unimpressed at the large present in Alexia’s hands. 
“Hola Mami,” Alba greeted softly. They both wanted to make this up to you, of course, but they also hated when their mother was mad at them. 
“I do not think that buying her a present is going to fix this.” Eli said pointedly. Alexia and Alba exchanged nervous glances, relaxing slightly when Eli allowed them further into the house. “What is it?” 
“It’s the new camera. The brand new canon model that she wanted, with all the extra lenses and storage and stuff.” Alexia said, feeling less and less confident about how she and Alba had chosen to go about this. 
“And you think that is enough?” Eli asked bluntly. 
“It’s a start.” Alba said, a bit defensively. “We know we messed up, Mami, and we missed the opening night but we can go see it today. Are you not being a little dramatic about this?” 
Alexia shot her younger sister a look, knowing exactly how hurt you were, because Olga had returned home from the gallery and told her. 
“You did not see her last night. When she realized you weren’t coming? She completely shut down. She talked to everyone she needed to, but I did not see her smile the rest of the night. She rushed out of the building just as the evening ended, and by the time I got home, she was sitting on the couch, sobbing. It was supposed to be her night, and you ruined it.” Eli snapped. 
Alexia and Alba both looked appropriately ashamed, their heads dropping, gazes pointed at the floor in an almost identical fashion. They felt guilty, obviously, but Eli wasn’t quite sure they understood that it wasn’t just about them missing your event. It was so much more than that. 
“She asked me why she is not more important to both of you than an argument. I do not want to spoil the gallery, but I do not think you understand how embarrassing it was for her to have countless photos of you two up on the wall, when you did not even come.” 
Both her daughters’ heads snapped up at this. “Of us?” Alba asked. “The project was of us?” 
“It was about her loved ones. You two were featured more than anyone else. She was so excited to see your reactions to the photos.” Eli continued, only making them feel worse. 
“Please, Mami, I cannot hear anymore.” Alexia said softly, her heart aching at the thought of how upset you must be at the moment. Every detail that her mother added made it worse. She wasn’t sure she’d ever done anything like this to you before, and the thought that you might not forgive her was filling her with anxiety. 
“No, you will hear all of it.” Eli said, shaking her head. “She said to me, ‘I was so excited for them to see, I just wanted them to be proud of me.’” 
“We are proud of her, she has to know that.” Alba cut in desperately. Her mother just shook her head. 
“She does not. Nothing she ever does feels very important to either of you, because it is always something you have done before. This was something that was her own, and she just wanted to share it with you. Everything your sister does is so that you two will be proud of her, and pay attention to her.” 
At this, Alexia stood up from the couch, walking over to the window and putting her face in her hands. Her shoulders shook with silent cries, and neither her mother or her sister were very surprised at the emotional outburst. Alexia was always emotional when it came to you; she remembered the day you’d been born, every milestone in your life. You were your very tough sister’s soft spot. 
“Do you think we can fix it?” Alba asked quietly, terrified of her mother’s answer. 
With a deep sigh, Eli nodded her head. Alexia turned around hopefully, hanging on to Eli’s every word. “Your baby sister has always been more forgiving than both of you. She is hurt, but she will forgive you. She loves you both too much not to.” 
Every word Eli said felt like a bullet to the chest to both of your sisters, something your mother was well aware of. She wasn’t going to sugar coat this. It was silent in the room for several minutes, every member of the family lost in thought. Alexia looked furious with herself, Alba looked like she was close to tears, and Eli just looked disappointed. She’d always trusted your sisters to take care of you when she couldn’t, but she wasn’t so sure she had that confidence in them anymore. 
“I have an idea.” Alexia said finally, looking between her mother and her sister hesitantly. They both agreed to what she proposed, though, and it wasn’t long before Eli had pulled out some paper and pens for her daughters. They both sat on the floor around the coffee table and got writing. It was reminiscent of when they’d do their homework in the same spot years ago, sitting on the floor so they could play with you while they finished their assignments. 
Now, though, you were painfully absent from the scene in front of your mother, and Eli could only hope that this would work. 
-------
Alexia and Alba agreed that only one of them would go upstairs, give you the two pieces of paper, and let you be for the evening. Alexia was desperate to see you, while Alba wasn’t sure she could do so without crying, and she didn’t particularly want to put that on you at the moment. You hated seeing your sisters upset, and she didn’t want to inadvertently guilt you into forgiving her before you were ready. So, Alexia made her way upstairs, agreeing to Eli’s warnings to leave you alone if you wouldn’t let her in. 
Her knock on your door was uncharacteristically gentle, and her voice was almost shaky as she announced herself. 
“Nena? Can I come in for a minute?” 
Taking a deep breath, you opened the door, feeling rather satisfied to see the guilt all over her face. 
Alexia stepped into the room, looking so nervous and so unlike herself. She was fidgeting with two pieces of paper in her hands, barely able to bring herself to look you in the eye. “I am so sorry, hermanita. More sorry than I can put into words.” She didn't seem to know what else to say, and you rolled your eyes. 
“Do you think that is enough?” You asked. 
Alexia shook her head rapidly. “No, I know it isn’t. Alba and I are going to fix this, nena, I promise. Whatever we have to do, whatever it takes. We will make this up to you. There is nothing more important to us than you.” 
Your eldest sister could tell you didn’t believe her, the way you looked away from her was a dead giveaway. 
“I know you are upset, and that is okay. I just… can I give you a hug, nena? You can still be mad at me and everything. I’d just really like an hermanita hug.” Alexia said vulnerably, tears clouding her vision. She had underestimated how painful it would be to see you so upset with her, but her chest truly ached as she took in the betrayal and disappointment on your face. A few tears fell from her eyes, and it was this bit of emotion that had you nodding your head, stepping forward as Alexia wrapped her arms around you almost painfully tight. 
It made you feel better, even though it probably shouldn’t have. Your sister’s hugs always felt warm and safe, and today was no exception. Even though she’d hurt you. It was still Alexia, and she was a hard person to stay mad at. Still, you pulled away before you wanted to, and the blonde cleared her throat, holding out the pieces of paper for you. 
“From me and Alba. We will be downstairs, if you want to talk.” Your sister opened and closed her mouth a few times, before shaking her head, mustering a weak smile, and leaving the room. She shut the door behind her, something she never did, always insisting on leaving it open just to bother you. 
You opened your sisters’ letters, not quite sure what you would be reading. You weren’t quite angry anymore, just sad. You were never one to hold a grudge, but you weren’t sure how they were going to be able to make this stop hurting. 
You underestimate, however, how well your sisters knew you, and combined with the information they had from Eli, they knew just what to say. You read both the letters a few times, tears streaming down your face for what felt like the 12th time that day. This time, though, they were good tears. 
Both letters were similar, but very… specific to each of your sisters. 
Alexia’s was practically a bullet pointed list, in her messy, big handwriting. There was a mark on the page that looked suspiciously like a teardrop, and Alexia talked about her emotions in the letter the way she always did in real life; saying as little as possible, while still somehow saying a whole lot. 
Alba’s was a real letter, paragraph after paragraph of neat writing, beautifully articulating what she wanted to say to you. It was always a bit surprising to remember how perceptive Alba was. She was a forgetful person, but not when it came to the things that mattered. This was clear in the letter, as she listed small details out that you hadn’t thought she’d noticed. 
Both of the letters were an apology. An apology, and a deep dive into how proud of you Alexia and Alba were. They apologized for not making it clear, before going back to when you were a baby, and they watched you walk for the first time. Through the years, they had overlapping and different memories of things you’d done that made them swell with pride. There were things you remembered, and things you didn’t, but they made you feel special all the same. Alexia and Alba did pay attention, that much was clear. Even if they weren’t always the best at showing it, they paid attention to you. 
It did more than a verbal apology could have ever done. It was something tangible, kind, warm and loving. It made you feel loved, and seen. It made you feel like you mattered. You weren’t Alexia, and you weren’t Alba, but you were you, and they felt that to be something much more special. 
You tried to hold out a bit longer, you really did, but you were putting the letters down and rushing downstairs before you could really stop yourself. 
You passed the kitchen on the way to the living room, where your Mami was preparing dinner, a small, relieved smile on her face. Wishing you had something funny and unbothered to say, you walked into the room, seeing your sisters sitting on the couch, looking pathetically distraught. 
“Hola.” You said softly, feeling indescribably happy when both of their faces lit up at the sight of you, and you quickly crossed the room, wedging yourself in between them. They made room for you, as they always did, allowing you to fit easily into your spot squished with Alexia on one side, and Alba on the other. 
They each wrapped an arm around you, and both tried to pull you in opposite directions. It was ironic, the way they used you to play a silly game of tug of war. This time, however, they stopped pulling when they realized neither of them would win. Instead, they both wrapped you into a very awkward and suffocating hug, arms wrapped around you from seemingly every direction. 
“I love you, nena.” Alexia whispered, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. 
Alba did the same to your cheek. “I am so sorry, hermanita, and I love you so much,” she whispered. 
“I know.” You said softly. “I forgive you.”  
And if it had been either of them in your position, it would have taken a lot more. You were the forgiving sister, though, and you’d really just needed proof that your sisters thought that you were as important as you felt them to be. 
When Eli came in the room a few minutes later, it was to see the three of you in a rather familiar position; you in the middle, each of your sisters holding on to as much of you as they could, completely content. They’d always like to hold you like that, starting when you were a baby. Alexia would carefully put you on the couch in between them, and put a movie on. They would take turns telling you all the important details your brain was far too small to comprehend, but you didn’t squirm, and you didn’t fuss. You would stay plopped right in between them, one of each of their fingers gripped tight in your hands. 
It was a lot different now, because you were all bigger. It looked like an uncomfortable pile of limbs on the couch, but Eli knew you were all as comfortable as you’d ever get. 
-------
Neither of your sisters seemed very willing to let you out of their sight anytime soon, which you were sure would grow annoying very fast. For now, though, you enjoyed the attention, especially when Alexia pushed the wrapped box that had been sitting on the table into your hands. 
And, you’d already forgiven them before you’d seen the camera they’d bought you, one that you’d been desperately wanting for a while. If you hadn’t forgiven them, though, you would have now. You could be bought, and your sisters were well aware of it. As was your Mami. She rolled her eyes as you stared in awe at the camera, as Alexia and Alba looked on proudly, sharing a discreet fist bump. Personally, Eli thought you’d let them off kind of easy, but she shouldn’t have underestimated you. You were a youngest child, and you knew how to get what you wanted. 
“Can we go see your photos after dinner?” Alba asked, not even getting a glance from you, your attention completely zeroed in on the camera in your hands. 
“Nope.” You replied. Alexia and Alba looked uneasily at each other, and then at their Mami for guidance, before you spoke again. “Alexia, you are going to clean my room. And Alba, you are going to make me those cookies I like. We can go see the gallery tomorrow.” 
Your face was smug, and your mother stifled a laugh as your sisters looked disgruntled at each other. Begrudgingly, though, they both nodded. 
“Anything for the princess.” Alexia mumbled, and Alba snickered quietly. 
“What was that?” You asked, turning your attention to your sisters. They looked at you in defiance, smirks on both of their faces, not willing to let you completely walk all over them, even if they deserved it. 
“You heard me.” Alexia teased. “The baby princess always gets her way.” 
“Really, Ale?” You asked calmly, before turning to Eli, your new camera briefly forgotten on the table in front of you. “Mami, do you have any plans in two weekends? I was thinking we could take a trip just the two of-” 
Alexia cut you off by rather aggressively throwing herself at you, covering your mouth with her hand. “NO HERMANITA!” The blonde shouted. “Oh, gross, nena, really?” She groaned, pulling her hand away when you licked it. You smiled triumphantly, managing to push away from her a bit. 
“You are not a princess, nena. Just a little baby.” Alba chimed in, reaching over from her chair to pinch your cheek in one hand. “Now keep quiet before you ruin the surprise and give Ale a stroke.” 
Your mother shook her head, taking pity on her eldest daughter, who looked prepared to explode at the thought of the surprise being ruined. “Do you think I do not know you were planning a trip for the four of us, Alexia? Honey, you asked me several times if I was free that weekend, and reminded me not to make any plans then either. You also asked me for hotel recommendations, and pretended it was for you and Olga. You are a bad liar, mija. I have known for weeks.” Eli laughed. 
Alexia frowned, shoving you and Alba both away from her as you both collapsed into giggles, despite the fact that this was entirely her fault, and you and Alba were blameless. She knew there was teasing coming her way, but the smile on your face was well worth it. Order had been restored, and both of your sisters had made promises to themselves, and to each other, to not let their arguments hurt you anymore. You were just happy to have them both there, at home. All four of you together, how it was supposed to be. 
-------
it will really always be funny to me that my sister and i do not say the words "i'm sorry" to each other. like we'd both rather die than apologize. she could hit me with her car and i wouldn't want her to apologize because... ew. anyway sometimes having a sister is cool and sometimes its not but i love mine.
everyone applaud me for not splitting this into two parts. seriously i am astounded at myself right now.
hope you all like it :) give me all your thoughts.
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cute-sucker · 13 days
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note: this is a continuation of ex-husband rafe headcannons !! please send requests about this relationship! would love to write more about this <3
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rafe cameron being your ex-husband made nothing easier and you hated every bit of it, specifically when you started to date again. it was like alarms went off in his head, as he started to show up more. you hadn't told anyone about dating anyone, but your therapist had recommended it.
she'd eased you into it, telling you maybe it was time to put yourself out there into the market. you had shook you head, and laughed at the suggestion, who would want you? a single mother with a obsessive ex-husband. but then suddenly you started to consider it. there was nothing wrong with it, so you accidentally brought it up to rafe.
you had been a bit tipsy, after downing a few fruity cocktail at rafe's work party. you still went to them even though the two of you weren't married. you tried not to notice the way rafe was still wearing the golden band around his neck, and the way his hand travelled to the low part of your back.
"hi," you whispered to him, leaning on him. he looked surprised, of course he was, anytime you saw him you were either scolding or glaring at him, and for you to be giving him your prettiest bright smile? that was something.
"hi sweets," he replied back softly adjusting your dress before dropping his gaze to your lips, and quickly back to your eyes. "what's on that pretty mind?"
you giggled, feeling happy as you looked up to him, "i think i'm going to start dating again. i think it will be good for me, what do you think rafe?" you asked him, before sipping your drink again.
you missed the way that rafe's eyes narrowed at your confession or the way his arms got tighter around your waist, hand going up to touch his nose. yet you felt a little uncomfortable, as you tried to wiggle away from his tight arms.
"yea? what gave you that idea?" he asked you quietly, yet his words felt razor sharp as he gritted his teeth, "who put that silly idea in your head?"
here you frowned, absentmindedly twirling your straw in your pink glass, "um," you started feeling your throat clogg up, "i don't know i thought-? why you think i'm not pretty enough? that i'm ugly now that i've had a baby."
"no, of course now sweets. but i just think it's a bad idea," he said biting his lip, tilting his head in that innocent way. it grated on you, and you rolled your eyes and you felt yourself sober up.
"fuck you cameron. fuck you," you whispered, tears welling up in your eyes, before sniffling and you shoving your drink into his hands.
you tried to forget that. after all the both of you pretended it never happened, practically tip toing after one and other. he still came around once and while, trying to be sweet on you before you muttered something with an annoyed expression to get him off you.
and for a while you didn't see him, untill the day you were going on a date. you had a pretty dress on, dangly earings and a diamond necklace. all dolled up, you absentmindedly hummed under your breath feeling a bit nervous, only to hear the front door click open.
there he was. rafe cameron staring at you as you were making your breakfast. he quickly made away to put his arms around your waist, taking a deep breath of your perfume. "you smell good. all of that for me?" he teased, and you made an uncommitted hum.
"hey baby," he said to your baby girl with an easy smile, winking at your little girl who ran into his arms.
"aww you've grown, haven't ya?" rafe cooed to your little girl who jumped nodding furiously. she was holding some flowers in her hand, and had little pigtails. then she told him she had to show him how high she could jump, and he nodded raising his eyebrows in interest, but you didn't miss the way he scanned you and your party dress.
you wanted to give him a dirty look, but when he made your daughter happy like that there was nothing you could do but smile under your breath hoping that he wouldn't notice. you continued to prepare the pancakes, licking the chocolate batter and tossing in a few blueberries.
finally, he seemed to pluck up the courage to ask you. you felt your body tense up feeling anxious.
"where are you going?" he asked softly, eyes watching you move in the kitchen, "you look too pretty to just be dressed up." you closed your eyes, letting out a tired sigh. you could almost feel your throat clog up as you balled up your fists.
you had to tell him. couldn't lie, because rafe cameron would figure out anything he wanted. there was a reason he was a good business man it was because he continued to go for what he wanted leaving other things in the process.
"i have a date today," you said slowly, sprinkling powdered sugar on the warm pancakes, and before he could open his mouth you quickly started to speak again, "daisy, come in sweetie! breakfast is ready."
the look he gave you told you things were not done.
˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚
"so who's the guy?" he asks you with a measured look, and you try to ignore the way he's gritting his jaw, and the way he's eying you in that predatory way.
you sighed, putting away your plates. daisy is gone playing with the new toy that daddy got for her. how convenient, you thought, it was almost as if what was going to happen. as if he had planned this all.
"just a random guy."
"lucky guy."
"alright, rafe, just say it!" you hissed out, spinning to look him the eye. "just say what you came for."
rafe closed his eyes, running a hand over his hair, "listen. if it was up to me you would live with me, we'd still be married, and there wouldn't be a random guy!"
"well good thing it's not up to you then huh?" you spat back, pointing an accusiatory finger to his chest, "you made a decision when we were married. you. not me. you were gone for nights and nights for work, it felt as if i was drowning and, you screwed this up."
"you think i don't know that?" rafe muttered back, throwing his hands in the air, "you think i don't wake up every day knowing i lost the best woman in my life."
you felt tears well up in your eyes, "no, you can't say that. you can't say something like that. not after everything."
"fine. have fun in with your date."
and then he's gone again leaving you with your shattered heart.
˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚
rafe cameron being your ex-husband made nothing easier yet when you came back that night crying over the phone, telling him how he screwed up everything for you, he still picked up. he came over, nursing you back to health, his soothing warm hands on your back as you sobbed into his chest.
the two of you stay like that, a parallel of what could have been.
taglist: @bouearis , @kys4-20 , @rafeecameronsbitch , @mrsbarnesblog , @slytherins-heir
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tarjapearce · 10 months
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Marvelous
Miguel O'Hara x Pregnant! Reader
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WARNINGS: Little bit of angst, fluff, protective Miguel. Nudity appreciation, pregnancy, emotional distress over pregnancy, body change.
Summary: You don't feel enough for Miguel. He proves you wrong.
Requested here
Hope you like anon ✨
Being with someone like Miguel was far from easy. Coworkers in Alchemax, that slowly melted into friends, little jokes here and there, a little more trust and the friend line blurred more and more, until, oop! Attraction led the way until love went ahead of it.
And now, a couple of years later, here you were, padding your fingertips and massaging gently the top of your round and pregnant belly.
Miguel was like a happy madman when you told him that you were pregnant. But that also had been the start of a stage you had never seen him before. Overprotection.
If you wanted to get your slippers, he'd bend over and place them on your feet, to avoid you flexing too much. He'd always get behind you as you walked down the stairs, would literally do anything to make your pregnancy easier.
Even though his overprotection could be a bit vexing at times, it had more benefits than anything. Your feet were sore? He'd bring some soothing oils and massage them. You woke up craving something? He'd wake up and drive and didn't dare come back until he got you what you craved. Back pains? None of that as he would be your own personal heat provider.
The man loved you, that was much true.
----
As you walked through the streets hand in hand with him, it was unavoidable to not notice the hungry stares some women did his way, then they'd look at you and sneer in a subtle grimace.
Miguel was way into his thoughts to actually pay attention at your mood changing. Self consciousness in your appearance sinking deeper in your head.
"Can... Can we go home?" You halted and he seized you with a curious gaze.
"Thought you wanted to try the place?"
Shaking your head you just pulled him back. The scrutinizing eyes just turned sharper around you. Heart beating faster, some hidden laughs as they glanced your way. You needed to go, your head was spiraling into an unkind tornado of self doubt and deprecating thoughts. Hand squeezed him tightly.
His eyes squinted but he just nodded
"Wanna order food from home?"
You shook your head.
"I just feel a bit tired, that's all." of course he'd notice the little break in your voice.
----
You stared at the mirror, naked. Swollen feet, extra pounds that had settled in your hips, inner thighs and arms. A wider back. Stretch marks in every place you reached to see. Dark spots in certain areas, face puffed and breast that didn't precisely offer much perkiness.
Disgusting
Your mind groaned.
How could he look at you and not feel repulsed?
No. He loved you. Right?
He could get another woman once you've given him what he wants.
The mere thought brought tears to your eyes.
He wouldn't. No he would never do such thing
Why would he waste his precious time in someone like you?
Heart beat painfully fast in your constricted chest.
You're just embarrassing him.
Shaky hands took the first thing that they could grab. A sheet.
Hide away!
The sheets were wrapped around your body, tightly. Your legs made you curl in in the corner nearby the bed. Your own corner of shame.
What did he see in you? What had possessed him into putting a baby in you? Surely there were far better and prettier suitors. Suitors that would look the opposite of you in their pregnancy.
You had seen so many gorgeous women which pregnancies were a breeze. Unlike you, all over the place with clothes that barely fit you. Miguel had given you some of his t shirts and jerseys to be around.
Speaking of the devil...
His keys just tinkered as they were put in the usual spider shaped tray in the entrance. He called your name, but it only made you to recoil further in the sheets.
"Mi amor?" His hand pushed the door open and frowned upon watching you on the floor, sniffling and shielding yourself from whatever that had harmed you.
"Princesa?" He approached carefully upon hearing your muffled sobs. His heart gave panicked leaps. Were you hurt?, No. The doctor had said it was a perfectly healthy baby, and there was no visible sight of any emergency in plain sight. His heart wrenched as you covered more in the sheets the more he approached.
"Go away..."
He stopped, but slowly walked to you.
"Miguel, please just-"
He sat next to you.
"Wanna tell me why my wife is crying on the floor and wrapped in a sheet?"
Shaking your head, you wiped your tears.
"H-How can you be with someone like me?"
The question threw him off guard.
"What did... you just say?"
He wasn't angry, just genuinely curious as to why you'd ask such thing.
"From so many options you could've picked, why would you choose me?"
"I'm sorry but I am not understanding."
"C'mon, Miguel. From all the prettiest women you could've picked, you ended up with me. Why?"
His mind clicked at the sudden realization.
"Because I love you, that's why."
You weren't convinced much to his dismay.
"Come." He stood up and helped you up.
He guided you to the mirror in the middle of the room and stood behind you.
"Is this why you wanted to come home?"
"I see how women stare at you."
"So?"
Bit by bit he removed the sheets off your body, despite your meek struggles to keep it on you.
"They're not you."
He placed his arms around your belly.
"Just look at what you're doing. You're carrying my child. My child, Mi vida. You think I would've picked someone else for this?"
His mouth went to your neck, to plant little kisses along your flesh.
"You think I don't appreciate your body going through such changes to keep my child inside?" He kissed your cheek.
"Mírate, chula." (Look at you, beautiful)
You refused. But patience went both ways in your relationship. His fingers took your chin and pulled it to make you see yourself in the mirror.
"There you go. Wanna know what I see?"
He wiped your eyes and sighed.
"I see my wife. Going through a natural process of change."
His hands roamed your hips.
"These hips are my favorite. You know why?"
Not the littlest idea.
You shook your head.
"Because none can take me like they do. And they will literally stretch away in a way I'm still trying to process, just to get our baby out."
"Anyone whose pregnant can do that"
"Not really. You know how many women go through a C section because they can't push the baby out?"
Fingers wiped the fresh tears from your face again.
"But you, just... How can I not feel marveled at you? Don't take that away from me, Mi amor. Besides, you think I wouldn't find you irresistible just because you're pregnant?"
Your mouth was set in a pout and he chuckled.
"You know how much I want you? God, You're gorgeous, mi reina."
You broke in tears and he held you close, hands caressing gently and dotingly your body, he then kneeled to kiss your belly and then kiss you.
"You gave me hope to have a family again. And that's... something no other woman, but you, have achieved. And I would choose you all over again to do so. Got it?"
You nodded through teary eyes and he laid you down.
"Are you hungry?
"Hmm"
He squeezed you softly and kissed your forehead while chuckling
"Such a silly girl to think you're unworthy, really"
"I love you." You'd mumble as you curled into his chest, his hand caressing your hair.
"I love you too, bonita."
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soapsbaby · 1 year
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Silly Spicy Call of Duty headcanons
Characters: Simon "Ghost" Riley, Johnny "Soap" MacTavish, König, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra, John Price, Valeria Garza, all x reader Rating: 18+ (Minors DNI) Themes: All NSFW but very lighthearted, nothing particularly triggering but ask to tag! Word count: 750ish
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These are just silly little headcanons about them, PLEASE if you have any like these send them to me i had such a blast writing them lol!!
Ghost
Sometimes his mask slips a little and he looks goofy as hell, you have to do your best to not laugh into his face because you know he won’t let that slide.
Uses British lingo sometimes. Has called your pussy a “fanny” before. Got mad when that made you giggle.
Once got so frustrated with trying to figure out how to operate one of your vibrators that he broke it. Was very apologetic and immediately ordered you another one afterwards.
Soap
He is clumsy as hell. Every time you have tried to fuck in a position that is anywhere near athletic, something goes wrong. It’s a miracle neither of you have broken your necks trying to get it on in the shower. He will always take the fall though, protecting you with everything he has and curling himself around you even if it means he will end up bruised or bleeding.
Makes a lot of typos when sexting, never notices. Called you “baby gorilla” once (you will never let him live that down).
Gets offended when you call him “Soap” in the bedroom. You know my name, what are you calling me that for? Dummy.
König
He doesn’t usually wear his balaclava under his mask when you have sex since it gets too sweaty but since his mask is pretty loose he will sometimes have to pft-ppf-tpftt when it gets stuck in his mouth. Has almost choked on his mask before.
Gets so flustered that he will just start sputtering nonsense. Has on several occasions been so out of it that he has messed up the nicknames you use for each other. “yes show me that I am your little babygirl, wait- no, you are… I am your boy… you’re… Wait, I’m sorry”. Not a gender or kink thing, which would of course be alright with you, just him being a dummy.
Is a bit of a crier and drooler sometimes which wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that he will sometimes accidentally waterboard himself in his mask and not tell you.
Gaz
Has called you mommy once and was mortified. Neither of you have really spoken about it but sometimes you will drop little hints around him to get him flustered.
Likes when you suck him off while he is playing video games but then gets too into the game and genuinely can’t help but get annoyed when he loses because you distract him.
Cpt Price
Is oblivious to any signs that you want him. Will go into Dad story telling mode and completely ignore the effect he is having on you until you grab him by the shirt and just tell him to fuck you.
Has a sex playlist called "sensual" with just the most cliché sex songs on it possible. Can unironically have sex to "Careless Whisper" and “Let’s get it on”.
Has given you rug burn with his beard before. 0/10 very unpleasant experience (you’d do it again, though).
Alejandro
Will say things that could be interpreted as sexist in the moment and then immediately get apologetic. Who’s my good slut? I mean… If you want to be. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to… Are you okay with that? Okay. Cool.
Will fuck you in uniform because he knows you’re into that and then get distracted by things he finds in his pockets like shopping receipts. 
Doesn’t care whether or not you understand him, he will speak Spanish to you.
Rudy
Gets tormented by you with new pet names every day. mí amor, I don't know what a Zaddy is. I don’t even know if that’s a good thing.
In the beginning of your relationship he was completely oblivious to most kinks. If you ever expressed anything out of the ordinary to you, he’d raise his eyebrows in confusion and say something like “what? why would anyone want that?” but was always open to trying anything. Now he is probably even more of a deviant than you are.
Valeria
Has this roleplay thing going on where you are a traitor to her cause and she discovers it and gets to “punish” you. You find it a little silly but it gets her super riled up so you play along.
Secretly loves to bottom and to be taken care of by you but would never tell you (you know anyway). Thinks she is being very good at hiding it (she is not).
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sugarmouchie · 6 months
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⋆ ˚ ꩜ "you're the most handsome man i know" trope hehe
PAIRINGS. alhaitham 〳 zhongli 〳 wriothesley x gn . reader
CW. jealousy lawl 〳 insecure bbies but u reassure them 〳 slight ooc characters 〳 lmk if i missed anything :]
NOTE. i know jing yuan is the header but shh he's adorable so we don't talk about it
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ALHAITHAM ꒱
with the gray haired sleepy head "resting his eyes" on your lap as he quoted, your eyes couldn't help but drift towards the small features you always adored so very much.
"haitham," you randomly spoke, to which he looked up to you, his eyes weary and his throat raspy as he eyes you up and down, waiting for you to say the oh-so-important thing that interrupted his peaceful sleep.
"you know you're really pretty, right?" you smiled, his eyes shutting for two seconds then opening again as soon as he heard your words, i mean, you tell him that everyday, so why would he overthink about it?
you notice his confused state, and so you begin to speak once more, not knowing that your words would sent a mental alarm in him.
"i mean," you pause, "you are the most handsome man i know."
as much as you like the small pink rising across his cheeks, it instantly fades away as he glares up at you.
"what?" you glare back at him jokingly, basically just trying to test the waters.
of course you knew how alhaitham was like, but what you didn't know is that he can get insecure from time to time but you're completely unaware of it.
with kaveh always bugging him about something that happened in the akademiya, he can hardly catch the peaceful moments with you like this, which led you to your obliviousness to his insecurities that formed when he was away from you.
"you know other men?" he finally speaks.
"..."
"just accept the compliment," you playfully roll your eyes, to which he turns his head away from you to.
"no no, i'm sorry, you're the only man i know," you quickly reassure, to which his eyes practically light up to.
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ZHONGLI ꒱
in the middle of you and zhongli's conversation that involved his unusual gossiping about his stressful day at work today, he cleared his throat, a usual sign that he was about to change the topic.
"what is it?" you instantly notice his eyes forming into almost pleading ones, which was very unusual for him.
"could you grab me a cup of tea real quick? i've been feeling a bit dehydrated during this conversation," he speaks, patting you on the shoulder twice, it always worked.
you looked him in his golden eyes and your confusion was very obvious to him.
"not proper of me, hm?" he smiles at you, his lips tugging up back into that gentle smile he always praised you with.
"not really, no," you laugh.
he loved that laugh. the laugh that always warmed his heart whenever he had the time to do things like this with you.
the laugh that he gained from you.
"beautiful," he catches you off guard as you begin walking to the now boiling hot water to make his tea.
"you're one to talk," you smirk, "you're the most beautiful man i know, zhongli."
he raises his brows, "oh? you've never told me about anyone, dear," he teases.
"oh," you pause in your tracks, your hand on the warming pot of water which you didn't notice until it got hotter, "that's not what i meant, silly."
"you're burning your hand there, dear, be careful," he teases again, but this time it's more like a warning for you not to get hurt.
"you distract me too much, i'm almost done with it," you turn your head back around to face him, the pot now fully heated up, ready for you to prepare it for the tea you have been holding back on him ever since he started teasing you.
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WRIOTHESLEY ꒱
assisting your boyfriend in his work was stressful, yes, but you couldn't lie all the time when it came to going down to the pankration ring.
"you're not doing it right," he comes up from behind you, guiding your hands to help you aim your bow at the upcoming red ball.
"pull your string back and once your arrow is there, aim it at the middle of the ball," he assists you, and your mind can't help but be caught onto his voice and the guidance of his hands holding yours.
"careful, you don't wanna hurt yourself," he teases when he notices you staring at his strong arms assisting you, "you zone out too much, love," he laughs.
"and you pay attention to everything too much, love," you tease, emphasizing the word 'love' to catch him off guard like he did to you.
right after that, he faces you towards him and raises a brow.
"what? cat caught your tongue?" you giggle and put your index finger to his lips, practically a way to tell him to be quiet.
he takes your finger off his lips and shakes his head 'no'.
"ugh," you roll your eyes, "you're lucky you're the most handsome man i know," you continue, to which he tilts his head at.
"do you still want help with this or not, [name]?" he smirks at you, noticing your instincts.
"i gave you a compliment, what do you mean?" you tease, to which he sighs at.
"other men?" he rolls his eyes back at you, to which you instantly notice his insecurities about your words.
well, yes this was your whole plan, to tease him like you always do to each other, but you didn't know he'd get jealous!
"wait, i'm sorry," you frown, "it was a joke," you continue, pulling him into a tight embrace.
"don't do that again or i'm not letting you see sigewinne for a week," he chuckles, hugging you back, to which you instantly pulled away and looked at him with wide eyes.
"you're joking right?"
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SUGARMOUCHIE © do not copy / translate / repost my works on other platforms, thank u :3
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steddieas-shegoes · 5 months
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wayne's got him
for @steddieholidaydrabbles prompt 'wayne adopts steve' rated g wc: 680 cw: migraines tags: hurt/comfort, established relationship, fluff
--------------------------------------
Steve's head was pulsing, a sharp pain shooting from his eyes to his neck, sitting at his jaw for minutes at a time.
He hadn't had a migraine this bad in a while, and definitely not since Eddie had started working. He didn't have anyone here to help, and Robin would be at work until the afternoon.
He slowly rolled over in bed, wincing as the pain got worse from the movement.
He couldn't contain the whimper he let out as he tried to settle again, his head hurting too much in every position to try to get comfortable.
"Steve? Y'alright?" Wayne's voice was probably a normal volume, but it felt like shards of glass in his ears, against his eyes.
Apparently, his responding whimper was enough to have Wayne opening the door and coming into the bedroom.
"You dyin'?" Wayne whispered, seemingly sensing that every noise was too much.
"No," Steve managed to say. "Migraine."
Wayne didn't respond at first and Steve couldn't keep his eyes open. What little light was coming through the window felt like the sun was shining two feet in front of him.
And then the light was gone, the room was nearly pitch black, and Wayne's footsteps were getting closer to the bed.
"Gonna get you some water and meds. Hungry?" He whispered.
Steve shook his head once, barely.
He may have passed out for a minute or two because the next thing he knows, he's being slowly lifted enough to take a sip from the glass that's being held against his lips.
"Just a few small sips, son. The meds are crushed up in it," Wayne whispered.
Steve did his best, dribbling some when he accidentally opened his mouth too far.
Wayne wiped his mouth and chin after with a towel hanging off the chair by the bed.
"Called Eddie to let him know, told him I got ya."
"'S okay."
"I got ya, I said. Lay back, I got the ice pack."
Steve did what he asked, sighing with relief when the ice pack was placed on his forehead.
"That better?" Wayne asked.
"Mhm."
"Leave it for ten minutes and then I'll switch it out with the hot water bottle."
Eddie must've told him that helps.
Their day wore on, Steve sleeping when he could find some relief, letting Wayne nurse him back to health when he couldn't.
By the time Eddie got home, Steve's head was in Wayne's lap while he slowly massaged his temple.
"Any better?" Eddie whispered.
"A bit," Steve replied softly. "He did the ice and heat."
"Of course he did. That's where I learned it from," Eddie smiled softly at him.
"You go get cleaned up and then take over," Wayne said to Eddie. "I got him."
Eddie kissed Steve's forehead before walking to the shower to wash off the day.
Steve closed his eyes again, trying to fend off the nausea of the smell of chemicals from the mechanic shop that always lingered on Eddie after a shift.
"Stinks, don't he?" Wayne asked quietly.
Steve smiled.
"A little. 'S okay."
"Smells hurt worse though, don't they?"
"Yeah."
"He's still got some learnin'. But I got ya both 'til he does."
Steve turned his head to look at Wayne.
"Why are you helping me? Weren't you tired after your shift?" Steve asked, realizing for the first time that Wayne had just gotten home from his night shift when he found Steve miserable that morning.
He'd been awake for more than 24 hours now, and didn't seem even remotely worried about himself.
"Cuz you're my boy. I love ya and if ya need me, I'm gonna be here."
Steve felt his eyes start to burn with incoming tears, his throat closing against a sob.
"But-"
"No buts. You got me same as Ed, and if I could, I'd adopt you too. Okay?"
"Okay."
By the time Eddie made it back into the bedroom, Steve was asleep, and Wayne's eyes were drooping closed.
Eddie didn't have the heart to make Wayne get up.
It'd be okay; He had Steve.
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theminecraftbee · 6 months
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Etho and Grian are back at base, hysterically laughing over their achievement. Cleo sits inside, staring, as the two of them talk about getting a wither and a warden to fight, and tries to figure out what she feels about it.
In some ways it's not their fault. Task made them do it and all that. Plus--
Well, it's not like she and Etho are losing hearts anytime soon. They've both done a damn good job keeping themselves from dying. A benefit, Cleo thinks, of deciding to team with Etho this time. Between the two of them, they'll largely only do chaos they can recover from. Maybe this is their game. Maybe this time, Cleo manages to stick with someone until the very end. It looks like it. It looks like...
Grian, of course, is the confounding factor.
She wasn't going to turn him away. He needed allies. They needed someone a bit better at actually doing damage than herself or Etho. It's mutually beneficial. And, besides, he's weirdly lovable, in an inherently kind of dangerous way. A little like loving a bobcat someone had accidentally raised as a pet cat until it got a bit too big and stinky and murdery for them. Like, yeah, he shouldn't be domesticated and he's not, really, in any sense of the word, but it's a bit sad to watch him try to survive on his own now, right?
Hah. Maybe that's what Scar managed to do to him. Would explain a lot, really.
Anyway, he's her bobcat now, which is the problem.
See the thing is: Cleo understands Etho. It's why finally deciding to be partners for once felt... right. They're similar flavors of people. Scared, mostly. Survivors, but not in the 'will stab anyone' way that like, Martyn is. Loyal, although Cleo has no delusions that Etho is as loyal as she. And scared. Has she already said that? Scared. It's important to the kinds of things she and Etho are. Like... mountain lions, maybe. Mountain lions that have been around just enough people to know how dangerous they are. Like that.
God, she's only doing cat metaphors. Bdubs really is turning them all into furries.
Anyway, the point is, Grian isn't scared.
And that... terrifies her.
That's scarier than anything else. Because, see, Cleo wants to survive. But more than that, she wants her partners to survive. And she and Etho, the two of them are doing well. Better than most people. They're green and they have so many hearts.
But Grian? Grian's yellow and not afraid and goading Etho into not being afraid too. It's not their fault, exactly, Cleo thinks. They both had hard tasks. They didn't have a choice, Cleo thinks.
But. But.
She doesn't know what to do, if Etho gets convinced the humans down the mountain aren't scary. She doesn't know what to do if he gets too close. She doesn't know what to do if he gets hurt.
Because she--she doesn't think she can learn to stop being scared, anymore.
But she also doesn't know how many times her heart can stand to lose someone.
Did you know--wild cats are social? They have a reputation for being loners, but mountain lions, they're social. They don't do well being alone. They don't actually hunt solely alone. That's the important bit here. They seem independent, sure, but actually...
Anyway. This is Bdubs's fault. For making her a furry, apparently.
She watches Grian and Etho scheme together and sits back and breathes and tells herself that Etho isn't going to stop being afraid anytime soon. That if push came to shove, he, at least, would retreat back, and that maybe the two of them could convince Grian to retreat too. Safe from hunters. Safe from red.
Maybe safe from hurting each other, too.
(She's not so sure about that part.)
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thevoidstaredback · 29 days
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How To Balance Your Daytime and Nighttime Activities So That You Don't Burn Yourself Out More Than You Already Have
Dick had to give it to the kid, he'd somehow thought of everything. It was a little concerning, actually, but the kid had brushed off every attempt had probing for answers. Who trained him? If he was trained at all. ...had the kid gone into vigilantism alone? Oh, dear. THat's not good fro Dick's current worries.
Reading the file Danny had handed him, Dick had to wonder how long it had taken him to put together this cover story. Also, where he'd managed to get the equipment to do it. At a glance, the kid didn't seem to have much on him. Not even a phone!
He closed the folder and set it back down on the table. "Really?" he asked, "'Congratulations, it's a boy'?"
Danny's cheeks turned a bit red as his gaze shifted to the folder. "Well, yeah. You're stuck with me now until I can get you into good habits and a healthier schedule."
"That implies that you're planning on leaving."
Danny shrugged, all his confidence now fading away. Is this what he's really like? "Well, I mean, I'm sure you don't want me sticking around at all, let alone for a while."
Dick frowned and looked back at the black folder and the binder sitting on his coffee table. God, his apartment's a mess! He smiled at Danny. "My name's Richard, but everyone calls me 'Dick'. You can stay in the guest room."
Danny lit up like a fucking Christmas tree. "Really?"
"Yep. You went to all this work, it'd be a shame if it all went to waste."
The grin on Danny's face was more than worth the security risk that he now posed. "You won't regret it, Mr. Dick!"
Dick smiled back at him, "Please, drop the formalities. We're cousins, apparently."
Was he attached? No. He wouldn't allow himself to get attached. Sure, maybe he was letting this kid - he really needs to start calling him Danny - stay with him for a while, but he wasn't going to get attached. Getting attached meant losing him. Dick wasn't sure he'd be able to survive if he lost someone again.
...damn it.
***
First order of business, now that Danny was officially Dick's - why would he willingly go by that nickname? - ward/cousin, Danny was going to make sure he got some sleep. Today was Dick's day off, so Danny had sent him to his room to take a much needed nap. The man was basically dead on his feet and Danny would be damned if he let him wander around this mess of an apartment with blurry vision.
The second thing he did, once he was sure Dick was asleep, was start to clean up. The place was a stereotypical bachelor's pad, complete with questionable stains in the carpet, rips in the cushions, dishes piled up in the sink, and old take-out on every table and counter. Gross.
He made quick work of the old take-out by throwing it all away and hitting it with a very small and controlled ectoblast. He was so glad Dick had disposable gloves on hand.
The dishes were the next thing he handed. The water was cleaner than in Gotham, so he didn't worry about washing the dishes by hand when they all didn't fit in the dishwasher. He dried the ones he'd hand washed before putting them away. Dick had no organisation in his cupboards, so Danny fixed that, too.
The fridge and freezer weren't too bad. Sure, the dairy products had all expired and most of the food was freezer bitten, but none of it was moldy yet and the appliance itself was in perfect working order. He'd have to go shopping later.
Danny had never liked cleaning, but he'd had to when his parents refused to follow any OSHA laws or Lab Safety courses. So, when he found the cleaning supplies, he took a deep breath and began scrubbing the bathroom. It wasn't too bad, thank god, and was already fairly clean. It was quick and he was able to move on very quickly.
The counters, tables, walls, and tile and wooden floors were all easy to clean with a wet rag and a broom. He wasn't going to even try saving the rug because it looked well beyond the point of no return. The couch and chair cushions could be sticked up, but he didn't have a sewing needle and thread with him.
The last thing he did before taking his backpack into the room he'd been given was to write down a shopping list and leave it on the counter. It wasn't a lot, just food and some dishes and toiletries. He'd have to figure out with Dick a way to pay rent, too, but that was a later Danny problem. He'd tired himself out and was still running on pretty much empty. So, he allowed himself to fall asleep. He'd check on Dick when he woke up.
Part 4 Part 6
Tag List:
@flame-343 @ghestie93 @anarinette @aglmry @peachtreewriter @evix-syne666 @loudlypanickinginvenezolano @lumosfeather18581
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ktgoodmorning · 16 days
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Goodnight, mi Tana
Aitana Bonmati x adhd!reader
This is just my experience as someone with adhd, I know I don't speak for everyone!
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Masterlist
“Baby, do you realize what time it is?” You jumped at the sound of Aitana’s voice suddenly breaking you from your focus on your book. She had been gone most of the day with some friends and you hadn’t heard her come home, let alone come out to join you on the balcony. Your eyebrows furrowed because of course you didn’t know what time it was, but you weren’t sure why it mattered. You had been laying there for a while now, reading and working on your tan, just basking in the beautiful weather.
“I don’t know, three, four O’clock?”
“It’s almost eight! Have you-”
“Eight?!” You jolted up, “How the hell is it eight? I’ve been out here almost the entire day. How did I not notice?!  I haven’t even eaten!” 
You thought you’d been outside for maybe an hour or two, definitely not the whole day. Now you had hardly any time left to do the laundry or any of the other more “necessary” tasks that you put off until you had done some reading. 
In your slightly panicked state, your girlfriend came to join you, taking both your hands in hers to break you from your thoughts and try to calm you down. “It’s okay, love. I can help you get some of that stuff done before we go to bed, and we’ll have plenty of time to finish it up tomorrow.”
You pulled your hands from her hold and roughly ran them over your face with a loud groan. “No, Aita, you don’t understand! I wasted my whole day out here and I still have so much energy because I want to do other stuff but now I need to start winding down to go to bed soon.” 
Aitana was used to you sometimes getting frustrated at yourself for things like this but this was the worst you had been in awhile. It was clear you had no intention of being outside all day but once you got into your book, there was no way of stopping you. It killed her at times to see the way it affected you and how you got so angry at yourself even though you both knew you were doing your best. “Well you’ve still got time, you could start something else tonight and finish it up tomorrow?”
“No! Why would I bother starting it tonight if I can’t just finish it? If I start something else I’m gonna be up late trying to finish, there’s no point.” Your voice had inadvertently raised, something that happened quite a lot and you were both used to at this point. Your girlfriend knew not to take your yelling personally and that it wasn’t her that had you losing your patience, it was entirely yourself. She’d almost prefer if it were her fault though, because at least then she would know how to help. When it was with yourself, there was little she could do.
“Why don’t we just start by going inside and getting you some food? Then we can go from there and see what time it is.”
You gave her a slight nod and allowed her to help pull you up and lead you inside to the kitchen, motioning you to sit down while she got some food out for you. “Any requests?”
“Uggghhhh, no. Nothing sounds good, I’m not even hungry anymore.” You buried your head in your hands, resting on the table as you whined at your girlfriend who was just doing her best to help you. 
“I’ll just get you a little bit of everything then, and I’ll eat whatever you don’t want. At least one of them should be okay.” Atitana was mostly talking to herself, sensing that you had hit a wall where you didn’t feel like talking much and just wanted to focus on regulating yourself. She could see your shoulders rising and falling as you took some deep breaths, but decided to keep working on getting some food together, rather than try to help you calm down right now. She kept a close eye on you while she finished making your food, wanting to make sure you didn’t get any worse. When she set the plate down in front of you, she ran her hand gently over your back to get your attention. 
“Baby, what can I do for you? I really think eating will help but we could go eat on the couch instead, if you want? 
You remained silent but gave her a nod as you pulled your head from your hands and tiredly looked up at her.
 “Oh, baby,” she pushed some hair behind your ear, heartbroken by the helpless look on your face, “Let’s go sit down; I’ll bring your food.”
You followed her out of the kitchen, looking much like a young child who had just been woken from a nap, and laid down on the couch lazily. 
“Do you want me to grab you a blanket before I sit down?” Aitana set your plate down on the coffee table and was now just looking at you expectedly, trying to figure out how to help you. 
“Tana,” your voice was almost a whisper, suddenly much quieter than you normally were. “Could you just lay on me for a few minutes?” 
Her previous face of worry broke into a soft smile, more than happy to fulfill your request. “If I ever say no to that, there’s something seriously wrong with me," she giggled into your neck as she gently laid down on you, both of you instantly relaxing into the contact. 
Both the pressure of her on top of you, along with the sound of her laughter, helped distract you from the anxieties that had been building just moments earlier. It was like hitting control alt delete on your spiraling and making it magically disappear. Suddenly your breathing was calmer, as well as your mind, and you no longer had to worry about all the things you didn’t get done, you had all the time in the world to make sure it all got done tomorrow.
After a few minutes of just laying there, both at peace with where you were at, the Catalan woman’s head popped up to look at you. “Think you’re ready to eat some food?” Her persistence made you smile. She obviously knew that food would help you feel better but didn’t want to push too hard to get you there. 
“Si. Food sounds like a good idea.” Aitana rolled off of you and passed you the plate she had made up, full of a variety of different foods. She knew how picky you got when you were in a bad mood so she made sure there were plenty of things that were always safe bets. “Gracias, Tana. This is perfect,” you leaned over to give her a short kiss, “You know me too well.”
She brushed it off with a small shrug and kissed you again before you started digging into the food in front of you. “Don’t feel like you have to eat it all, I’ll finish anything you don’t want. Then maybe when you’re done you can shower and get changed, and then we’ll put on a movie or something?” 
You groaned, mouth still full of food. “I don’t want to shower, it feels like so much work.”
“What if I say I’ll join you?” You quirked an eyebrow at her, trying to see if she was serious. “I’m not saying anything’s gonna happen, I’m too tired for that. But I’ll still join you if you want?” Your girlfriend watched you continue to shove food in your mouth while you contemplated her offer. 
“If you’re joining, then I’m in.” Her eyes lit up instantly now that she knew her plan would work, just smiling at you and cuddling into your shoulder as you finished your food. Knowing you didn’t like sitting in silence for long, she filled you in on her day and her time with her friends, getting you caught up on everyone’s lives. You normally didn’t like to sit and listen to people without chiming in yourself, but with Aitana, you could do it all day long if you could. Something about the way she would break into little giggles and looked so bright when she talked about the things she loved, just made your heart full. 
You hadn’t even noticed you had just finished the last of your food until she pointed it out to you because you had been far too focused on listening to her story. “Baby, I’ll take your plate, if you go get in the shower. I’ll come join you in a minute, yes?” You responded with a kiss before getting up and helping her up as well. Both going your separate ways until she could join you.
...
After your shower, you both got changed and brushed your teeth together before getting cuddled up under the covers of your bed. 
“Do you want me to put a movie on? We don’t even have to watch, maybe we just put one on in the background while we just cuddle?”
“That sounds absolutely perfect.” You rolled into her side before she even had a chance to respond, chuckling lightly at your sudden clingy-ness. “Don’t put on anything too serious, I’m not planning on paying attention. I’ll probably end up talking through it or falling asleep anyways.” You both giggled at your words. It was true. You almost never made it through a movie and Aitana was always there to tease you about it.
You snuggled into her further, placing your head on her chest as she held you against her. “Maybe I should read a little bit before bed. I didn’t have much left in my book when you came home today, I bet I could finish it.” 
“Amor, I mean this in the best way, but you have over a hundred pages left. If you even look too hard at that book, you’re gonna be up all night trying to finish it. That’s not a good idea. We have training tomorrow.” 
“But Tanaaaaaa. It’s really good and I just think that I’d sleep better if I knew what happened. We only have morning training so if I’m tired I could just take a nap in the afternoon.”
“I understand you want to finish your book baby, but you aren’t pulling any more all-nighters. You need sleep, it’s not healthy.” You only responded with a pout, eyebrows furrowed together, locking eyes with her in hopes that she’d give in to you even though you both knew it wouldn’t work. You were constantly giving her this face yet she rarely gave in, especially if it was something related to your health and well-being. When she only responded with a blank stare, you dropped your head back to her chest to continue chatting.
As soon as you got comfortable again, the two of you immediately fell into conversation about anything and everything. You talked about the transfer window and all the current football news, the book you had been reading and all your thoughts on it, truly everything that popped in your head. Somewhere in the midst of your talking, you realized that the movie Aitana had put on in the background was actually somewhat interesting, making you split your attention between it and your conversation. 
“Baby! Are you even listening?” she tickled your side lightly as a way of bringing your attention back to her.
“I’m sorry, Tana!” You giggled into her neck, hugging your arms around her tightly. “I was trying to listen but look, the movie actually got kinda good!”
“You never get through entire movies! And now when we finally get smart and put on a boring one you suddenly pay attention?!” She wasn’t actually mad at you, the huge smile on her face made that incredibly clear. You just beamed back at her. The two of you probably looked ridiculous as you both smiled at each other from ear to ear, saying nothing while the movie continued in the background. 
“Aita, you should really pay attention, it’s good!” Your girlfriend rolled her eyes at you before following your attention back up to the television. The two of you managed to snuggle even closer together, if that was even possible. You still talked here and there when you thought of anything but were mostly focused on the movie. 
It wasn’t long until you felt Aitana’s breaths evening out underneath you. When you lifted your head to look up at her, you found her sleeping peacefully, clearly exhausted from her busy day. You moved slowly in hopes of not waking her up, trying to reach for the TV remote to turn it off and go to bed. Of course the second you moved though, her eyes fluttered open and a look of confusion crossed her face. 
“What are you doing, baby? I’m watching!” Her accent was thicker than usual, giving away her little nap no matter how much she wanted to pretend it didn’t happen. The way she pretended to hide the fact that she was falling asleep just so you could finish the movie made you smile. She was always doing things like this, and you couldn’t have been more grateful for it. 
“Aita you’re falling asleep. We can finish it tomorrow night, it’s okay. Let’s go to bed.” 
“No! No, I’m not falling asleep!” 
“Okay, well I’ll just turn it off anyways and we can keep chatting.” Your girlfriend rolled her eyes at you, obviously knowing what you were up to, but still getting further settled under the blankets. You reached over to turn off the lights and plug in your phone before you ended up laying face to face with Aitana. Your legs were tangled together in the sheets and the two of you were just looking at each other, sharing a soft smile. Her eyes were wide open now that she had woken from her little nap, but you couldn’t decide if she was actually feeling that awake or if she was just trying to hide the fact that for once, she was the one who drifted off during a movie and not you. 
“We should really be sleeping right now, Tana. We have early training tomorrow and we both know you like getting to bed early.” You could function just fine with little to no sleep, or at least you liked to think so, but Aitana was a different story. She was much more strict on her sleep routine and would definitely feel it if there was a change to it. 
“I know…” she trailed off, going quiet for a moment. “… wait! Remember what Ingrid was telling us about their anniversary coming up?”
“Oh my god, yes! Do you think she’s actually gonna do it? I know Mapi would love another cat but I just can’t see Ingrid going through with it! Can you?!” 
And there you were. Both exhausted, both needing to be up early in the morning, both excitedly gossiping about your best friends. This was normal for you but normally you were the one who started it and kept you both up later than you planned, not your girlfriend.
It was obvious that Aitana wasn’t used to being up this late when her accent became harder for you to understand and her words started slurring together. It slowly became an intertwined mix of English, Spanish, and Catalan that you had no hopes of comprehending. 
“But Bagheera is su bebé, así que tal vez no want someone else para robar la atención and maybe- wait why are you laughing at me?” 
“Tana, you’re half asleep and making no sense. You’re not even gonna remember this conversation tomorrow, I really think you should go to sleep.”
“I’m not even tired, though.” her grumbling was hardly audible as you just shook your head at her, amused by the reversal of your typical roles. 
“Okay well I’m gonna go to sleep, you can keep talking if you want, okay?” her only response was an incoherent mumble as you curled up into her side and pressed a soft kiss to her cheek. “Goodnight, mi Tana. I love you.”
I really like my other adhd!reader one better but we'll see. I don't love this one. I wouldn't be shocked if I still do more like this though.
Requests are always encouraged! I'm starting to run low on ideas lately!
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astarion-obsessions · 7 months
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I think not enough people understand that Astarion doesn't want you to be his main or only source of blood. This even stands in direct contrast to what he really wants to achieve with biting Tav. Let me explain.
Why Astarion doesn't want you to be his blood bag
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Let me start with explaining how I approached this topic. First of all, when I triggered the bite scene in my playthrough, I obviously let Astarion drink from my Tav. But then I got curious. What happens when I don't stop him? He's said I could trust him just a moment ago, didn't he? So I did just that, I trusted him literally with my life. 
Aaaand... he killed me. Well. What did I expect from a vampire, really. But that he actually drained me dry broke my heart. I really wanted to trust him, to reach out and show him that I didn't judge him for what he was and so on. I was really disappointed in him and couldn't quite grasp why he would do this. Was it a conscious decision? Did he lose control? Surely he would apologise and explain everything to me once someone resurrected me, returning the trust I was giving him the night prior, right?... right?
Of course not. The dialogue after him killing Tav was... at least as disappointing as him killing Tav in the first place. He shows his usual attitude, apologises half-heartedly and then just keeps going on with talking about draining the occasional bandit. He even snaps when you mention the topic of him feeding after that with something like "I already apologised, what more do you want?".
There's no real regret, no emotions. He simply doesn't care.
We know that he didn't care in the beginning, he tells us as much when he confesses his unwanted, growing feelings towards Tav in act 2. But still the whole bite scene didn't sit right with me until…
The Nightmare 
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I randomly stumbled upon a clip of Astarion having a nightmare, so I researched about it and even started an Astarion run to experience it myself. So, if you play as Astarion, at the second long rest of act 1 he has a nightmare about Cazador, in which he recites the rules that defined how Astarion and the other spawn had to live:
First, thou shalt not drink of the blood of thinking creatures. 
Second, thou shalt obey me in all things. 
Third, thou shalt not leave my side unless directed. 
Fourth, thou shalt know that thou art mine. 
However Astarion reacts to this dream, he jolts awake afterwards and instinctively panics that he needs to find a way back to his master as soon as possible. His eyes set on his companions, who are sleeping / meditating peacefully around the fire, and then a thought passes his mind.
He could try to break one of Cazador's rules right then and there. He's able to stand in the sun, to bathe in running water, so maybe…
And that's why he decides to bite a companion. Astarion wakes up utterly terrified of what his master will do to him if he doesn't return to him in an instant - and he knows all too well what kind of horrors would await him if he so much as dares to think about rebelling again (read about that here) - so he is in desperate need of confirmation that he is now able to withstand and actively break the rules that have dominated his life for two centuries.
He needs to know that he is able to drink the blood of a thinking creature. And there they are. His clueless companions served on a silver platter. It's like an invitation to him, to test his boundaries. And who would be more fitting than the good hearted leader of the party Astarion wanted to (or already has) seduce(d) anyway?
This piece of information shed a whole new light on the bite scene. But let's look a bit closer at that. 
The Bite Night 
The very first thing Tav registers about what's going on with Astarion that night is him baring his fangs right above us, about to sink them into our flesh. He pulls back as soon as we open our eyes, retreating immediately until there's a safe distance between him and Tav. 
This may be the first time Tav gets to know that Astarion is a vampire, so he gets defensive and tells us that he's never killed a person for food, only animals. But then, instead of letting the idea of feeding on Tav go, he insists that animals aren't enough. 
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But it's not enough. Not if I have to fight. I feel so weak. 
If I just had a little blood, I could think clearer. Fight better. Please. 
Then he goes on, literally pleading to get what he wants while putting on a sad expression in the end, even averting his gaze. 
And if we now have in mind that he just woke up from a nightmare about Cazador, feeling powerless and in desperate need of even a glimpse of hope that he might escape Cazador's cruel grip, his lines make a lot of sense. He's veiling the truth, of course, but not all of what he says is a lie. 
He indeed feels weak - powerless in fact - so drinking Tav's blood (the blood of a thinking creature) could prove that he may have regained a bit of power over himself, which had been exclusively reserved for Cazador the last 200 years. This would absolutely make him feel stronger, more confident than he's felt for a long, long time. 
And he indeed could think clearer after tasting Tav's blood, because this would bring clarity to the question if he is now able to break Cazador's rules on purpose and therefore give him information to work with when he needs to think about what to do next. 
Right after this, we get the chance to push into Astarion's mind, and if we do this, we can see what he thinks about. 
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His mind opens up, revealing cracked and quivering memories. At their heart, you see dark eyes, commanding you to feed. 
You open your mouth and bite down. Not into a tender neck, but in the twisting body of a rat - the only thing your master lets you eat. 
He recalls the memory of how his master used to force him to eat disgusting vermin. As his memory is told, we can clearly see how deeply this affects him, for he can't keep up his walls of defensiveness and detachment. They just crack, crumble and reveal his misery clearly for Tav to observe. When we ask him about it directly afterwards, he first seems to search for a way out - a witty remark, anything - but gives up almost immediately. And he looks and sounds just completely defeated and tired, confirming what Tav just saw in his mind. 
He goes on with talking about trust. I think here he's seeing a chance to gain Tav's sympathy. If he already reveals such delicate information about his past, he can as well make use of it. So he appeals to Tav's understanding, offering us that this past is the reason for him only trusting Tav slowly. But then he immediately adds that now he trusts Tav, and that in return Tav can trust him, too. 
What he does here is displaying himself as pitiful, gaining Tav's sympathy, then seemingly going out of his way and saying that despite all he does trust Tav, which puts Tav in the position to follow suit with returning the trust… which Astarion definitely lied about on his part. But that's what he does. Manipulating. 
If we then respond with "You tried to bite me. How can I trust you?" instead of assuring us of his trustworthiness with more manipulation, he gets frustrated. 
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Because we don't have a choice! Not if we're going to save ourselves from these worms. 
But he goes on with masking his reasons, even if he gave us a hint right in the beginning of act 1 when we picked him up, where he said that he would rather control the tadpole instead of removing it. If we play as Astarion, it gets clear pretty fast that he holds onto the tadpole, because it seems to be the only thing that had been able to "save" him from Cazador whilst no one and nothing else even attempted to help him for two centuries. Of course he would not want to get rid of the tadpole just like that. But he says so nonetheless to align with Tav's goals and display himself as useful. 
And then he does something interesting. 
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I need you alive. You need me strong. 
Please. Only be a taste, I swear. I'll be well, you'll be fine, and everything can go back to normal. 
In the beginning of this conversation he mentioned he needed the blood to fight better. Now he takes up on this by saying that Tav needs him strong, hinting on him getting stronger after having a taste of Tav's blood. And then he promises that after this "everything can go back to normal", which right now means Astarion feeding on animals again. 
A few things about this are odd. 
Firstly, "only be a taste". Everyone, literally everyone has heard about the insatiable hunger of vampires. So how is it supposed to work that Astarion gets stronger from just a taste of Tav's blood? For how long? A few hours? Not nearly long enough to pose a real advantage, eh? For me this makes no sense. And if we think about his true intentions - wanting to find out if he can break Cazador's rule - just a taste would be absolutely enough. (And after he bites Tav without killing them, he even says that he needs something more filling!) 
Secondly, if Astarion really wanted to become stronger with the help of Tav's blood, why would he promise to go back to normal afterwards? He just offered Tav a stronger companion but then immediately nullified this argument by literally saying that this will be a one time arrangement. 
Thirdly, he subtly offers a bargain. "You give me your blood, I will be a stronger fighter for you." He did so in the beginning as well, repeating it with different words. And it fits his character very well to do so, because for all he knows everything comes with a price. He almost gets beaten to death and Cazador mercifully comes to his rescue? The price is a never ending life of torment and abuse. Astarion helps a potential victim for Cazador to flee? The price is a year of starvation, locked up in a dusty and dark tomb without knowing if it will ever find an end. Mindflayers rescued him from Cazador, (passively) granting him to possibly be free of him at last? The price is becoming a tentacled monster in the end. 
If we then allow him to bite us, he's visibly surprised about our graciousness, but of course doesn't let this chance slip and suggests getting comfortable instantly. Then he finally gets to sink his teeth into Tav's neck. This part of the scene can more or less be viewed from both sides - Astarion's and Tav's. 
He begins to feed on Tav and after a bit we can decide to interrupt him, but have to pass an ability check first. This repeats a second time when playing Tav, and even if it's only one AC when we play Astarion and decide to bite a companion, it still aligns, showing that Astarion seemingly loses himself in the taste of Tav's blood - which is very likely because (as he later tells us) we were the first humanoid he's ever fed on, so it's imaginable that Tav's blood must be tasting almost divine to him. 
This theory is supported by his actions after we fail the first AC or just let him continue. He grabs the back of Tav's head to pull them towards himself, emphasising on how greedy he is sucking the blood out of Tav. The camera even uses the exact same angles before failing or skipping the first AC and after, so the comparison is easy and the difference is clear:
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If we then fail or skip the next AC, Astarion just drains us dry… And it gets even better after the bite night. 
The Morning After 
When Tav gets revived and then talks to Astarion, he is visibly surprised to see us, after he left the dead body of Tav behind with saying "Oh no, something terrible has happened". Sure Astarion, something… 
All of this happens when Astarion still doesn't care for Tav. He reacts with panic when we confront him with the fact that he literally killed us, and just manages to get his expression under control after a few seconds. I mean, just look at him:
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'Killed' feels like a strong word. Not many corpses have your vigour. 
He definitely knows what he's done, and that 'killed' is indeed the right word for it, he is just very very bad at coping with guilt (which is amazingly analysed by thelikesoffinn - definitely read this, you'll understand Astarion so much better after this). 
He instantly lays the focus on our codependency again, that we need each other and so on. If we question why we should keep him around, he answers with:
A strong, well-fed vampire? I'm a powerful weapon - you'd be a fool to toss me aside now. 
With mentioning this, he wants to make sure that Tav will let him stay by their side and therefore grant him protection. 
But more importantly he continues:
Anyway, last night was an aberration. It will never happen again. 
He doesn't even start with something like "Next time I'll be more careful" or anything similar. He straight up says that it will never happen again. Period. If we then ask who he will feed on next time he gets hungry, he presents the idea of feeding on villains and bandits "who need killing anyway". And this is exactly what he wants. This even shows in his reaction to Tav's response to his suggestion.
If we agree and therefore allow him to feed on our enemies ("Sounds good. Glad we could agree"), this is how he reacts:
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As am I. I'm starting to feel a little peckish already. 
This itself doesn't sound all too enthusiastic, but we get his approval up, which definitely shows that he very much likes that Tav agreed. 
On the contrary, if we suggest he can feed on Tav, ignoring his will wish to feed on villains ("Look, I'm not against you feeding on me, but only if we talk about it first"), this is his reaction:
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Of course! This sounds eminently reasonable. 
I shall wait patiently until you suggest we… dine together. 
Doesn't sound too bad either, eh? But we don't get his approval. He doesn't disapprove, of course, because this is still a thousand times better than what he had until then, but still not what he really wants… 
So, what does all of this mean for the initial question? 
Conclusion 
The crucial point here is what it means for Astarion to feed on Tav. The only things he remembers since Cazador turned him, are being relentlessly dominated and horrifyingly abused. The things Astarion wants the most are to be safe and to finally have control over himself again. 
He bit Tav for the sole purpose of finding out if he can be free of Cazador's rules. So why would he jump right into being dependent on Tav? He suggests to feed on villains, because then he is free of anyone's mercy. He doesn't need to rely on Tav to graciously allow him to get a drop of blood. He can do this himself now. 
This is such an important step for his character growth, to find the way to his autonomy again, so if we only allow him to feed on Tav, it instantly sets him back into old habits of bowing to his masters words - or in this case Tav's. Because it's all hes been doing for the last two centuries of his life. 
So, as much as the thought of the self-sacrificing offer to be his personal blood bag may seem romantic or whatever, it's actually the exact opposite, trapping Astarion in what he desperately tries to escape from. The restrictions that come with someone dominating him mentally and physically. And as I mentioned earlier, he doesn't believe in the goodness of people. For him every "kind" act has a price and he likes to know what he has to pay, so he wouldn't even want to just drink Tav's blood without Tav getting anything out of it. He would most certainly expect Tav one day to come around with something he doesn't want to give or do, so he wants to control such situations beforehand. 
All he wants is to make his own decisions and be free in every way possible… 
So please just let him drain some bandits, will ya? 
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