Time always helps, ill get there 😇

couplea underfellers

No, real question. How you a transmed and nonbinary?

Not feeling very sociable atm, but just thought I'd say hey to everyone out there.

Been getting arty party creative lately, surrounded by stuff, creations and works in progress

Still not sure how I feel about being on another platform where I fail at being sociable or feeling like I have to post.

But I'm trying.......

Really trying in life.....

How to run a social media account without being sociable?

Putting myself out there. Fan art of the awesome and talented Raúl Esparza. SVU lead me to broadway and hearing him sing Petrified from Taboo broke my heart.

i decided to get over my FXKING fear of myself in the mirror & my weird fear of mascara / makeup BUT

here ye here ye fear not , I am now trying out different looks &welllll the verdict is in -

kinda funnn ☺️ i’m learning myself . & she’s , hmmmm ,

interesting ..

but i don’t hate it or her .? ❤️‍🔥🗝️🖤

I’m so sorry for being so self deprecating sometimes it’s been really really just ingrained into my brain and my psyche over and over again by abusive people and it’s extremely hard to just stop thinking in a way I’ve been used to for so long but it’s fuckin worth it to try and I’m trying really hard to recognize when I say hateful things about myself and catch myself and say “that’s not true. What they said was not true” it’s a tough process but I don’t deserve to feel that way about myself all the time

She seethes, waits, legs bent to pounce Schemes, laughs, rolls up an ounce

Also the flat version because I like it too lmao

I managed to do a little decorating for the holidays the other day..

my other decorations are in storage, I just can’t handle getting everything out and packing it back up later to put it all away this year, last year dealing with how bad my seizures were it was so chaotic trying to make myself feel like everything was normal, when it obviously wasn’t and I was adding to how overwhelmed I already was.. this year I am actually accepting that things are not normal, but that’s okay! Because I will get better and I will decorate the house for the holidays again, just not right now.

besides I’m not living at home right now and it would feel weird. So here is part of the room I’m staying in where I’ve put some new things I’ve collected over the past couple of months.

I wanted yo share with you all! I hope you enjoy them too!

I know I have yet to overcome my pain by the rate at which my wounds still bleed.

The taste of your betrayal still lingers on my tongue.

𝚑𝚎𝚢𝚔𝚒𝚌𝚔𝚛0̷𝚌𝚔𝚜

3:19am Monday morning-

I crawl into bed, cold as it was when i left it last, hastily grabbing the covers over me. Laying down on my back, i stretch and slowly yawn, pushing my hair back, it flows effortlessly through my fingers, with millions of neurons starting to fire, there i think to myself of how it was so similar to her, just like how hers was, how soft, fine and the perfect shade of brown hers was but wait.. there it is.. that feeling..it hits me...it hits so fast and without remorse, that feeling i had gone to great lengths to slip by from, grabs me and smothers me into my bed, i tense up and brace for what feels like death, it starts to take the breath from my lungs, putting pressure on my ribcage, im shaking, reaching up for air just to be denied. Tears are falling, making a mess of my clothes, the skin on my face starts to burn from all the salt settling, i try to refocus, maybe when i clear my eyes, you'll be there by my side, maybe if i cover my ears, blind myself and count to ten, you'll be there...you aren't, instead im left with my own solitude and pathetic sobs of anguish to listen to, to depend on, to get me through this time and space without you.

TF2 NEEDS A KISSING TAUNT!!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!

I'm fine is the biggest, most frequent lie I tell. It's easier to lie than admit how weak and broken I feel.

I need a space to talk about DID stuff man I'm tired of feeling alone and afraid of stigma 😔

changing mickeys design a little bit actually !!! theyve got new shiny face scars