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#there's still words i dont know on most pages but like i don't feel i have to struggle through every sentence anymore.

nereidprinc3ss · 6 months

Text

behave

in which fem!reader REALLY wants spencer's attention while he's working

18+ (no smut but sex is talked about) warnings: mentions of sex, spencer grabs readers wrist to stop her from doing something but its not violent, reader is referred to as a girl, no use of y/n, um i think that's it WC: 870 a/n: i have damn near 40 pages of spencer WIP so im biting the bullet and posting some of it. also.. if you want a plot... babe this is not the place for you im sorry... ive never even heard of a plot actually. i dont know about rising and falling action... i dont believe in that. it sounds fake

It feels like Spencer has been at his desk for hours.

And for hours you've been lounging on the couch, reading your book in silence so as to let him work. But you're becoming... antsy. Impatient. Every time you drop your book and stare at him, willing your white-hot gaze to draw his attention; nothing. He just keeps shuffling papers, signing, writing, reading reading reading.

At ten, you give up.

You make a show of slamming your book shut, sighing, slowly sitting up, stretching, standing, stretching again--when you turn your head, expecting your little performance to have at least earned a look from him; still, nothing.

"Spence?" you ask, innocuously, as you round the couch and draw toward him carefully, slowly, on light feet. A display of faux innocence. It’s not that you intend to bother him, per se--you're just so bored.

He hums in response, eyes still glued to his work as he searches for something among the mess of paper.

You come to a stop in front of the mahogany desk, tracing the edge of it idly with wandering fingertips.

"What are you looking at?" you ask, in reference to a photo he seems to now be studying intently.

"Nothing you need to see," is his muttered response, quickly flipping the photo face down on the desk and picking up a form walled in migraine-inducing tiny black text. You watch the way he scans the paper, brow knitted, and eyes squinted, clearly not paying you very much attention.

You move languidly around the desk, letting the wood drag against your hip the whole way, before reaching for the overturned photo--just to see what he'll do.

Spencer catches your wrist, his grip gentle and warm but not without portent. "What did I just say, grabby?"

Sadly, they're the most words you've gotten out of him since this afternoon.

You sigh dramatically and drape yourself across his lap, looping your arms around his neck. To your initial satisfaction he shifts slightly to accommodate you--and then continues to look over your shoulder like he hardly notices the pretty girl on top of him.

"When will you be done?" you purr, tracing his jaw with a finger.

"I'll be done when I'm done."

God, he can be stubborn.

"Can you be done any sooner than that?"

"What do you think I'm going to say to that," comes his flat reply, still not sparing you a glance. You watch enviously as his eyes dart down the paper he's reading over your shoulder.

"Then I'm staying right here until you're finished."

"You can stay here if you can behave."

You scoff, bunching the fabric on the back of his shirt in your fists. "What do you mean, if I can behave?"

Finally, you hear Spencer set down his pen, and he leans back in his chair to regard you. His gaze finally on you is like an ice bath. You literally have to repress the urge to shiver under his evaluation; the slightly raised eyebrows, the line of his mouth a little harder than usual. His 'you know exactly what I'm talking about so don't play dumb' look.

For a few tense seconds, you let your eyes dart between his, not wanting to break first. Unfortunately, you think that look of his could freeze saltwater.

"Fine," you mutter, flushing when you look down at his shirt collar instead. If you're being reasonable, he probably is doing something important. You drag your gaze back up to his and see that his eyes have softened.

"Thank you," he says, gentler, squeezing your leg before running his hand over it back and forth a few times. "I know I'm not being very fun today. When I'm done we can do whatever you want to do."

The urge to say, 'whatever I want to do?' is strong, but you manage to bite your tongue as he reaches back over you to continue his work. Instead, you content yourself to lean against him, allowing his solidity and warmth to envelop you for some immeasurable stretch of time.

Rain starts up, battering the windowpane and accented by deep rolls of thunder. The scratch of Spencer's pen on paper, the rustle of files, and the scent of patchouli and amber begins to lull you into a doze--a comfortable place between awake and asleep. It's the kind of comatose unconsciousness that bends and liquifies time, and you don’t even realize you fell asleep until you’re waking up.

Spencer murmurs your name, brushing your hair carefully out of your face. "Did you fall asleep, angel?" His voice is soft, just above a whisper.

"Mhm," you groan, rubbing your eyes. "How long has it been?"

"A few hours," he sighs. "That file took a lot longer than it should have, I'm sorry."

You're still bleary as you speak next;

"The thing was sex."

"What?" he laughs, rubbing your leg as you adjust yourself in his lap.

"You said we could do whatever I wanted to do when you were done, and it was sex. But now I'm tired."

"Let's get you to bed," he begins, "and revisit the sex idea in the morning. Does that work for you?"

You smile against his shirt, eyes already fluttering closed again.

"Mhm..."

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fic #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x self insert #criminal minds #spencer reid x y/n

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iouinotes · 4 months

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Heroic Betrayal | Luke Castellan (part 1)

SPOILER FOR THE PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS SERIES AND THE BOOKS

pairing: Luke Castellan x female!reader

show: Percy Jackson and the Olympians

warnings: dark!character, betrayal, implied sexual content, heavy angst, kidnapping

word count: 5,8k

summary: When Luke switches to the dark side, he tries everything possible to win you for him.

a/n: so as the show comes to an end (dont cry dont cry dont cry), I thought I would finally post this :)))

read part 2 here

"I'll find you!" his voice echoes through the forest, my laughter much louder than I intend to. But that´s just how it always goes. It's our own little tradition.

Every year when the camp starts again and we meet after the holidays passed, we play hide and seek in the dangerous forest of the half-blood camp. The creatures usually don't come across our path, in recent years it has rarely happened, that we actually had to defend ourselves against them.

Once it was an angry dryad, who threw branches at me (she had a crush on Luke and wanted revenge, but since I could understand her feelings and felt sad for her, we sorted it out).

Another time we were spotted by some camp members, who made fun of us, but Luke must have said something to them later, because we haven't been bothered by these troublemakers since.

It is always the same pattern, but each time there is still something special about it. We have grown, became more mature (I think), and have more and more experience about the struggles in life.

So being able to just let go for a few moments and being completely alone with him is probably the best thing to keep myself sane (even if he drives me a little bit crazy with the love I hold for him).

But a lot has changed recently.

It all started when rumors spread, that Zeus' lightning bolt had been stolen by Poseidon's son. And then the most supportive, bravest, sassy kid in the world showed up here. Percy Jackson. Ever since I met him, even though it's not his fault, there's been war going on. The gods are angry, the monster attacks became worse and again, rumors about the oldest, most powerful titan Kronos reached the camp.

It scared and frightened many people, including me. That's why we've been training harder and stay awake, even when the stars are shining, so that we can prepare for any catastrophe. To be able to fight.

My mother is the goddess Demeter, my father a simple man. I adore them both, even though my mother isn't one of my closest contacts. But I never really held that against her, because at least she decided to acknowledge me as her daughter. After all, it's a privilege that not everyone gets. My siblings and friends at camp are important to me, but the world is changing and so is everything around it.

The only stability I have left is my boyfriend Luke.

If I had to rely on one person in the whole world (and by that I also mean the underworld), it would be him.

He's been my best friend since I arrived at this camp. We've been together through ups and downs, I know every side of him and he knows everything about me too. Many of the people here are like blank pages to me, but not him. He is like my favorite book, that lays open to me and allows me to read each letter individually. Just as I know every of his dreams, every secret, every truth and every lie. He is my protector, my hero in every dark night and every bright day. Without him, I don't even know who I am. He is a part of me and my heart wouldn't be whole without him.

I watched him grow up. From the small, thin boy whose eyes hid so much pain and sadness to the strong, soulful leader he is today.

His beauty cannot be influenced by anything, he is like my very own sun, without him I could not survive.

I wouldn't want it any other way though.

Now, I'm hiding behind a tree with my back pressed against the bark and I am able to hear the cracking and swinging of the branches.

I smile so wide, that my cheeks start to hurt, when I hear his voice calling. My heart is beating in my throat, but it's not just the adrenaline of not getting caught. It's because of my love for him, which is so strong that sometimes I'm afraid of it. But only in the moments when I realize that nothing, but him is my biggest flaw. I think I would do anything for him.

Then I concentrate again and listen to the sounds around me. But his voice has fallen silent and I don't hear his footsteps anymore.

My eyebrows furrow, confused I try to look around the tree and search for an orange t-shirt. Likely together with his slim body, biceps, beautiful face and wonderful personality.

But when I want to withdraw again, it's already too late. A branch breaks behind me and before I can move I'm pushed against the tree from behind.

I immediately feel his body against mine, hear the laughter in his voice and listen to his strained breathing. His hands wrap around my body and turn me towards him, so that we are now face to face.

He's taller than me and as I look up, I feel the familiar fluttering feeling in my chest. I am so in love with him.

He grins triumphantly at me and I lean against the tree, smiling kindly.

"Found you, princess." The light reflects in his brown eyes and some of his curls are laying wildly on his head. He looks like an angel.

"I made it easy for you." My voice teases him and when he leans in so close to me, that our lips almost touch, I forget how to think properly. A habit I can't change. He's just so captivating.

"Yeah? You think I wouldn't have found you otherwise? Funny. I remember that in the last few years, I always was the winner of our little game." His lips brush mine, I want nothing more than to kiss him. But he knows that, which is why he slowly pulls back, when I start to lean forward.

When I want to complain, he puts his hand around my waist and pulls me into his chest. My knees almost give out, I feel so intoxicated by his presence.

"I-I wanted you to find me." My voice whispers quietly.

His eyebrows rise in mock surprise.

"Then I guess, I can claim my prize without feeling bad." In the next second, his lips are on mine and I'm unable to do anything, other than kissing him back. I wrap my arms around his neck and enjoy the warmth that radiates from him. He sets my heart on fire.

While pushing me against the tree, I've completely forgotten about, he lets his hands wrap possessively around my waist. Digging his nails into my hips, to keep me grounded. Otherwise, I would probably get lost in those sensations.

Luke kisses in a way, like it's the last time he'll have the chance. (As if I would ever want to keep him from doing that).

He's passionate, my body feels like it's on fire and the heat inside me feels so good, that I want more. I can never get enough of him and he knows it. He grins against my lips, but he doesn't break the kiss. I think he secretely loves knowing how much he can mess with me, with just a few kisses.

My hands find his hair and pull him closer to me, our chests touch and his breathing mingles with mine.

It is wonderful and so precious, I would refuse any gift from the gods just to be close to him.

When he pulls away from me, our bodies are still close. My eyes open and look dreamily into his, our gazes reflect a familiarity and love that is like nothing I have ever experienced.

He smiles at me, pushes a stray strand of hair behind my ear and leans himself against me. His fingers stroke the exposed skin of my pulled-up shirt.

"I've missed you." If my heart hasn't melted before, it has now. I give him a kiss on the cheek and hug him, we stand in our embrace for a moment. Enjoying each other's closeness, the calm feeling until the next chaotic situation happens.

"Now we are together again. Only that matters." It's quiet around us and when I close my eyes for the second time, I hear his fast heartbeat. I have to supress a smile.

The wind is the only thing I hear until his voice breaks the silence.

"Something will happen soon. Something big." The peaceful atmosphere is threatened by his words and when I look at his face again, I see his worried eyes.

I sigh, but then nod to agree with him. "I thought about that too, it feels different. Like something is coming our way, that we can't control."

His fingers stroke my cheek and for a moment, his face holds an expression, that I can't understand. It resembles regret.

But before I can ask him about it, he smiles tenderly at me again.

"Nothing will separate us. The world is just a game. It's a matter of time and making the right moves." That is his motto. But I'm not always convinced of this. Even though I trust him to do the right thing.

"I'm just worried we'll get seperated, you know? Evil can be sneaky and traitors always exist. You never know who you can trust." Something I said must have really bothered him, because he looks like I just stabbed him.

This time I ask him about it.

"What's on your mind? You can tell me. Two people who worry about something are better, than one who is alone with it." I take his hand and stroke his skin, it feels cold even though we have summer.

"Nothing, just- I don't want to lose you. I couldn't be here without you. I need you. I mean...I-I love you. You know that I would do anything to keep us together, right?"

His words surprise me. I know he loves me. I can sense that, everyone probably does. But he has never worn his heart on his sleeve and the three magical words only come out of his mouth on special occasions. The fact that he's telling me now surprises me.

"Of course. I trust you. We will survive together, I know that. Are you worried because of the rumors about the Titan King?" This topic is always very critical and he usually doesn't like to talk about it, but this time I decide to address it directly.

"He will come. I just want you to be safe, when it happens." He sounds so confident it gives me goosebumps.

"Perhaps. His followers will definitely try. But love is stronger than anything else. Especially our love. We will get through it." He doesn't look convinced, so I turn his face towards mine and kiss him.

My voice sounds soft, when I speak again.

"Luke, I love you. I could never leave you. Not even the King of the Underworld will be able to keep us apart. I promised to be by your side in every moment of our lives. You are my soul and without it I am damned."

This seems to reassure him, but I feel like he's not telling me something of great importance. But I don't want to push him, I know he will tell me when the time comes.

He always does.

⚔️⚔️⚔️⚔️

As the day comes to an end, I say goodnight to my siblings and report for my night watch duty. The situation has been a lot more worse the recent weeks. Kronos exists, my worst fear was confirmed. And he is building an army, that is so strong that it will be difficult to fight against it. But what I'm really worried about are the rumors about our people, who have also joined his cause.

Nobody knows who, the spies have been hiding ever since. I've never felt like I was paying more attention to my words than I am now. The only person I don't have to hold back to is Luke.

But even with him I notice the effects of the bad news. The circles under his eyes are darker than ever and his nerves are so frayed, that every little thing makes him want to explode. His temper is hanging by a thread, that is increasingly threatening to break. And I'm trying everything to prevent this.

No matter if I try it by making him laugh (which has become difficult), massaging his tense shoulders, trying to kiss him to the point of forgetfulness (usually it's the other way around) or when he takes out his frustration by burying himself deep inside me. With every thrust of his hips, I feel him relax, his hand so tight around my body as if I would run away, if he didn't hold me close enough.

He's changing and I'm trying my best to maintain his good sides. That he doesn't completely lose himself in his responsibilities and the pressure, that he has, because he is a member of the camp council.

Besides, I can't complain, when he fucks me until I can't breathe aynmore and I block out everything around me. When he comes, he whispers the sweetest things in my ear. Even if sometimes they sound so protective, that I could almost come from his voice alone.

When he whispers to me how good I am for him or how much he loves being able to have such a power over me like that - maybe it should scare me, but I trust him like no one else.

My mind concentrated his best for my shift, but when I finally go to bed after quiet some time, my eyes quickly close.

Looking back, I wish I had never let myself sleep that night.

Because, when I close my eyes I see waves. Hear the seagulls screaming in the sky, the fish swimming in the water and the distant cries of strangers.

It's all unusual and the bright light would blind me, if I didn't avert my gaze. And as soon as I do it, I see a ship. It's huge, rust shimmers in the sunrays, the anchor shows that it's been in the same place for a while now.

I feel something pulling me towards it, pushing and burning in my chest, leaving me with a tremor that I can feel, even in my deep sleep.

As I flit through the window like a ghost, I feel paralyzed. My blood freezes, I want to disappear immediately and in my mind I scream at myself to wake up.

But it's no use, whatever is here, someone decided that I have to see it. Only then, my wish will be fulfilled and I can wake up. So, I hide in a corner, there are scratched picture frames above me and broken glass is scattered on the floor. The monsters that loudly crush the glass ahead of me seem unstoppable.

I tremble as I look at at least seven dracaenae, several shaggy hellhounds and set my eyes on gigantes, that take up almost the entire room.

But that is nothing compared to the terror, that grips me when I see my classmates. My friends. People I trusted, who I fought alongside, for who I cared about. People I would have sacrificed myself for. They all betrayed me. And I feel close to tears. When I want to turn away, I hear a voice that almost brings me to my knees.

It's Luke.

My faithful and caring protector, my heroic love. Someone, to which I had dedicated everything. He was my life, with every single breath I took. The motivation behind my every action. The reason I wanted to survive in this cruel world. He was everything I had and everything I will ever have and in that moment it was abruptly taken from me.

I didn't have the strength to concentrate, it was as if every fiber of my body was on fire, triggered by the torment of my suffering heart. Seeing him like that, in black armor, Kronos' silver mark glittering around his neck, instead of his colorful necklace. A stoic, hostile expression on his face, his hands gripping his sword, it all hurt too much to watch.

And as I sank to the floor and covered my eyes with my hands, I was still forced to listen. I couldn't understand why he was saying such things.

"With every day he becomes stronger, with every participation in our army, we become stronger. Everything is planned, the camp is weak. Just like all of its residents. The surprise is on our side, because we will show no mercy. We will kill anyone, who does not confess to us. Do you hear me? No hostages will be taken. Only Hades population will be expanded."

The screams around me are so loud, so angry and horrific that I feel tears running down my cheeks.

I don't want to see any of that. The person infront of me is not my Luke.

A kind of fog creeps around me and I feel cold, it seems too late to forget it now. When I notice the golden coffin and Lukes hunched posture, the scar on the side of his face, I realize he is praying to him.

To the fall of Olympus. Kronos.

I want to cry, to scream, to be angry - but I just feel like every part of my heart is breaking and will never be whole again. Luke will never again be the one to heal it.

My consciousness leaves the ship until I finally wake up, but I can't move at first. I feel lost, my muscles are stiff and after a few seconds I notice that I'm shaking. But it's not because I'm cold, the summer air is wafting in the air.

Such dreams are rare, but are like the own scary predictions of the future.

And then it comes all back so me, the memories, that have just turned my whole life upside down. Traitor. The word appears in my mind, I feel like I almost can't breathe. And then there is a finger on my cheek, gently stroking the skin and my chest immediately becomes warm.

I know this gesture.

When I open my eyes, I see his loving eyes and the smile that covers his mouth makes my heart clench in sorrow.

It was just a nightmare. Luke would never betray me.

But the whispers in my head say otherwise.

As we continue to look at each other in silent, I notice his furrowed eyebrows.

"What's wrong, my love? Did you have a nightmare? You look scared. Don't be afraid, I'm here. I will always protect you." His voice is so calm, so usual loving and it makes the butterflies in my stomach fly around like crazy.

He is so beautiful.

As he briefly turns his head to tighten the blanket around me, I see his side profile and the scar. Reminders of my dream crash onto me like a lightning strike from Zeus himself.

I sat up abruptly. Luke is a servant of our enemy. How could I ignore that? I feel like I'm almost starting to hyperventilate. The thought, this nightmare, Luke's appearance, this evil feeling - it makes me sick. And I'm suddenly so afraid, more than I have ever been in my life. But I can't tell if it's the fact that I just found out he joined Cronos' army or that he broke my heart doing so.

I see him tense, my panic seems to be affecting him too.

My thoughts are so confusing, I don't know what to do, I have to tell someone. I have to-

His hands find their way to my cheeks, cupping them gently to direct his gaze towards himself. I would have preferred not to look at him, but I have no choice. His eyes search mine.

Then, as if the weight of Atlas punishment was put on his shoulders, he lowers them. His lips tremble slightly and his eyes look at me, as if I am the most valuable thing in the world and he is about to lose it.

"You know it." He doesn't have to say what he means by that. We both know.

I want to break away from him, but he won't let me. He's always been much stronger.

But everything still feels so different, light surrounds us and I can't really feel my body.

"Listen to me, please. I can explain it. Please-" The world goes silent, before he can finish his sentence.

It is too much.

I stifle a scream. I want to jump out of bed, but his hands hold me close. I only manage to fall to the ground, breathing heavily, but his arms are much stronger and I'm still weakened by my dream. He trys to hold me in a position, so that his back hugs me. His hands grab mine and one of them covers my mouth to silence me, when I want to scream for help.

With any other person, I would have known what to do. With anyone but him, I could have defended myself without any problems. But it wasn't just anyone and what he had done to me, the betrayal he had committed, was nothing I could handle.

I tried to wriggle out of his grip, to kick him, but the more I cried and the more hysterical I became, the easier it was for him to have control over me.

And for the first time, it scared me.

"Please calm down, I have to explain it to you- you have to know, that I never wanted to deceive you, please-" I notice how his voice is failing and he has to pull himself together, to not to lose his composure.

When I shake his hand away and want to yell again, he grabs my neck with such a warning force, that no sound escapes me.

I tremble in his hold. Tears stream down my cheeks and I literally feel my heart breaking.

Then he starts whispering in my ear and his grip feels like a tragic prison.

"Nobody can know. I never wanted you to find out. Not until I convinced you, that it is the right thing to join him. Because he will win, sweetheart. I want us to win by his side." His voice sounds so confident and at the same time, as if he was a completely different person.

Tears continue running down my face and he slightly let's go of me, so he can comfort me.

"If you would just listen to me, you will understand my actions. Please, just listen to me-" but the world blurs infront of my eyes and I am only able to whisper three words, before darkness surrounds me.

"You betrayed me."

⚔️⚔️⚔️⚔️

When I wake up, my head hurts so much, that it takes me several minutes to open my eyes. When I finally do it, I almost have a heart attack.

I recognize the similarity of this room from my dream. When I stand up, I run to the round window and look out, being only able to see the blue sea. Feeling empty and alone.

When I want to step out the door, I expect it to be locked. But instead the handle turns and I step out of the room. I'm so surprised about that, that I'm acting without thinking twice.

As I walk around the next corner, the deck creaks and I see an ugly creature in front of me, that makes every instinct to escape kick in.

I run in the other direction, but every turn makes me more desperate and, without any consideration, I run into the hall, I was so afraid of.

It is filled with all kinds of ciders, and I also see the figures of my classmates, wounded and unhappy.

It's all so overwhelming, that I dont even see him standing on the podium, in the first place.

But as the monsters try to grab me, his voice echoes through the room with an affable authority.

"Nobody touches her. You hear me? Nobody. She is under my protection." I almost freeze into a stature, as he comes towards me and I have no way of avoiding him. No weapon is within my reach, his eyes notice my growing panic.

"Everyone leaves the room. Now." Nobody discusses it, even if some roll their eyes or quietly protest. His authority is unquestioned, it sends a cold shiver down my spine.

When the last doors slam shut, we stand a few meters opposite each other.

"The doors are guarded." It's the first thing he says.

When he tries to approach me, I lose my nerves and run to the corner with the broken glass, that I saw in my dream. I take them in my hands.

I see his eyes widen and he stops in his tracks.

"You- you want to fight me?" He actually sounds surprised and sad. Like I was the one who betrayed him and not the other way around.

"Don't come any closer. I may not have been able to do anything last time, but if you take one step closer then-" I don't know what to say. In no scenario did I ever think, I would have to threaten him.

But despite my warning, he comes towards me with his hands raised, the panic within me so palpable, that I can feel every muscle in my body.

I dodge, when he is only a few meters in front of me. Right into the next corner. As far away from him as possible.

"Princess, you can't keep me away forever. I've always loved that about you. You need me as much as you need to breathe."

It's supposed to sound sweet, but his words make me feel sick

"I'd rather suffocate." He didn't expect that. My words hit him so unexpectedly that he is almost speechless. Almost.

"I won't hurt you. You just have to let me get to you and I'll show you everything. You will understand, believe me." He really thinks, I'll just stay by his side and let him explain.

"Are you crazy? You're a traitor, Luke. You- you betrayed everyone. You betrayed me. How could you do this?" I suppress my tears, because that's exactly what he's waiting for. That my defense becomes weaker. I can't allow this.

"You dont understand. I always told you I would protect you. And I can only do that, if I'm on the winning side. And I am now. We are." His eyes flash with a craziness that makes me tremble. I don't recognize him.

"Why are you acting this way? You are doing the wrong thing - you give up everything. You're giving up on us." Tears leave my eyes and I see him take a few steps in my direction.

"I'm doing the right thing for us. You'll see. You just have to trust me, please. You know I always win. With the power he gives me, I will be invincible. You don't have to worry about one of us dying in this war anymore." I can't move, even if I wanted to, I wouldn't have a way out now. He's too close.

"You are wrong. I would rather die in this war than join this monster and his deceitful army." The shards in my hand hurt, but I don't let them go. They're the only thing I can use to defend myself.

"You would leave me?" His eyes are staring into my soul.

"Would you fight me?" Every word is more intimidating.

"Would you stop loving me?" His words are like his own shards, leaving deep wounds in my heart.

He's standing right in front of me now, looking at me like I'm fragile.

Then he whispers "Would you kill me?"

In the next second, he suddenly has my hands in his, making me drop the glass. Be is only a few centimeters away from me now, his eyes are looking into my own.

"Would you, princess? Then show me." Suddenly he does something, I would have never expected. He takes out his sword and puts it in my hands.

His own hands go behind his back, his eyes tempting me. I feel all the blood in my body drain.

"Do it. I can't live in a world, where you don't love me anymore. In which you are no longer by my side. I am yours. That will never change, just like my love for you."

I can barely hold the sword, it's so wobbly in my hands. He stands in front of me and gives me every chance to defeat him. But I can't move.

It's quiet for a moment, then I see new hope in his eyes and when he speaks again, the tone of his voice melts my heart.

"What did you say a few months ago, you would always let me win? Let's win together this time. Please, just listen to me." His hand strokes my cheek. Wipes away the tears.

Then he drops his hand and grasps his sword, letting it fall to the ground.

He takes my hand instead.

"Follow me." He pulls me behind him, closer and closer to the golden coffin, it's like I'm in a trance, but when I finally feel the cold aura of something cruel, I'm able to think clearly again.

"No-" I don't want to be one step closer to this thing.

He turns around so quickly, that I can only slap his cheek, before he grabs me again.

"That was for kidnapping me. Let me go now!" I want to avoid his grasp. But again he does something I don't expect.

He holds me still, catches my gaze and then, kisses me so gently that the feeling alone makes me almost completely defenseless. His hands cup my cheeks, grip my hair, hold my body.

This is probably his worst trick. I've never been able to resist one of his kisses. And he knows that. He uses it against me.

Then he murmurs words against my lips, that barely reach my ears.

My heart is pounding in my throat.

"You feel this? We belong together. It is not written anywhere on which side we need to be. As long as we are together." His fingers stroke my lower lip, his figure towers over me and for a moment my surroundings fade. It's almost like always.

But he's not wearing his orange t-shirt, his expression isn't relaxed, and I don't hear any insults from the camp members in the distance.

"You're manipulating me." I am powerless against him. I thought we were on the same team, that no one had more power over the other one. But I was so wrong.

His eyebrows furrow again, and when his hands try to pull me against him, I hit his chest, without thinking, with the only piece of glass I hid in my pocket. But unlike I expected, nothing happens. The shard bounces off his skin and falls loudly to the ground. I can only stare at him in disbelief.

"How-" He just looks at me worried, no anger is visible in his eyes.

"You can't hurt me. I have the curse of Achilles upon me." I suddenly become aware of the effect the lake Styx in the underworld hast and I almost fall to the ground at the realization, my knees weaken.

"That was a test earlier. You wanted to see if I would kill you-" my voice fails.

He just looks at me sadly and smiles in regret. My heart becomes heavy.

"And I knew you wouldn't hurt me on purpose. You would never hurt someone you love. Not if you'd kill me in the process." What can I do? He knows me better than anyone, he can see right through my every thought.

"I can't do this, Luke. I-I can't be together with you, if you are like this." I'm serious, but he doesn't believe me.

"That's what you think, but it's a lie. The sooner you admit it to yourself, the more pain you avoid. Our souls are linked together, without me you are not able to live. I know, that you will continue to love me, no matter what I decide to do. That's how much you love me. You would rather die than not loving me."

I can't listen to him. I can't.

But his eyes are like all the promises in the world. He is my world. How could I ever forget that?

"Please come back with me, Luke. I-I won't tell anyone, but please. Let's go, let's forget everything, please-" I cant deal with this anymore. It's like he's draining all the energy out of me. More with every word, that leaves his lips.

"I can not do that. It will stay the way it is now. Don't fight against me, fight with me. You are so smart and loyal, you will be convinced. He will show you." His eyes now flash with something that frightens me. I see his hunger for power, something that has always been dormant within him.

"Luke, the only thing I ever really wanted was you. No power, no war, no prosperity. Only you. But I'm about to lose you. Don´t do this to me, I beg you." My hands find his face, stroke the skin and I look into his eyes. But they are no longer the same ones I fell in love with.

I never thought he would love having power more than he loves me. It breaks my heart.

"I have decided. Nothing will change about that. Not even your pleadings. I'm sorry." His eyes reflect my desperation.

"What's holding you back? All you need is me." He says it so confident, that I almost wonder, why I don´t agree with him.

But my conscience has always been my greatest strength.

"I won't betray them. I couldn't live with myself, if I did." He takes a step back.

"But you could live without me? You would rather be by Jackson's side than mine?" His words hurt me. But he speaks the truth.

"I love you Luke, more than I ever thought was possible. But just as you put power before me, I put loyalty first. And I'm not sorry about that."

Frustration finally seeps through his perfect facade. I wonder how long he's been playing with me. The thought of it makes everything inside me tighten.

"I am not letting you go. Our fate is set. You will recognize it too and when that happens, you will be on my side."

His conviction frightens me, but this time it doesn't freeze me into a statue. Now, I'm running away.

And luckely, he didn't expect that.

For a few minutes now I've noticed one of the windows, that doesn't look very stable. I just have to jump against it to open it.

"NO!" Luke's voice echoes across the room, loud and warning, but it doesn't stop me. Before he can catch up with me, I jump towards the window, my shoulder hurts, but I was right, it breaks.

But I didn't think about the height difference and I realize it might be too late to do something about it now.

As I try to hold on to the wall outside, two thoughts repeat in my mind.

Either I die or I'm trapped.

Then I hear Luke's voice. He sounds desperate and at the same time angry, like I have never heard him before.

The wall is slippery and it takes every bit of strength in me not to fall, I know it would be my death. I hold on to the broken wall.

"She is outside. Get her back, NOW!" My muscles hurt and I don't know what to do. Then I hear the loud beating of wings. Before I can see who it is, I hear Percy's quiet voice. I feel like crying.

"Drop down, I've got you." I have to trust him. So, I let myself fall without thinking.

Then I feel myself landing on something soft, I hold on to it and my knuckles turn white.

The screams and shouts of the monsters make me tremble, I just want to get out of here. Even if it means, that I perhaps will never see Luke again.

"Come on, now. They'll be here soon." As the wings of the Pegasus move towards the sky, towards freedom, I let the tears fall. The wind is beating around my ears and I can only see in the corner of my eyes that we are getting closer to the clouds.

"I'll find you!"

Luke's threatening voice is the last thing I remember as I close my eyes from the grief of leaving him.

#percy jackon and the olympians #luke castellan #x reader #greek gods #love #betrayal #angst #percy pjo #percy series #annabeth chase #percy jackson

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evilcowgirl · 1 year

Note

Hi! i was thinking of a prompt for some headcanons for autistic! reader x the gang members (any one you like!)

a sort of "they're a bit odd but i like that about em" since it wasnt discovered until 1911.

stuff like when reader gets overwhelmed/doesnt understand social que/shows empathy/apathy at the wrong moments

and mostly what they'd do when reader feels left out/like they dont belong because thats something im really struggling with </3

have a good day/night!

autistic reader relationship headcannons

pairings: arthur, javier, dutch, charles x reader

a/n: hiii loved this request sm !! feeling left out is the worst feeling but there's a place for everyone so pls remember that !! also i included dutch and john for the first time !! this is me using my autism powers for good

word count: 1k (combined)

Arthur

you bond over you both feeling unheard in the gang. you because communication is difficult for you (especially when you feel out of place) and for arthur it's because he and dutch got into an argument twenty minutes ago and he's still mad.

makes it his personal responsibility to make sure you never feel overlooked at camp because he knows how hard it is for you to settle in with the rest of the gang

during parties at camp he makes sure to keep you right by his side of you don't feel up to talking and reassures you that everything is fine if you get overwhelmed

doesn't think twice about intimidating your way out of situations he sees going south

"You can't just go around talking to folks like that"

"Nah you ain't do nothing wrong, just that people 'round here are real quick-tempered; thankfully for you i'm even quicker."

he writes about you in his journal more than anything else, pages and pages are dedicated to just how special you are to him !!

"They aren't like most folk, I like that about them."

arthur takes it as you being less influenced by social norms, which he's naturally drawn to as someone who doesn't get along too well with social norms either.

KING of aggressive reassurance, sometimes it can be off putting but you know he means every word he says.

"I promise you if they didn't want you here you'd be long gone, darlin'"

"Everyone here loves you, I think even more than they love me at this point so stop your nonsense."

Dutch

biggest autism fan

calls you eccentric because thats how he chooses to describe you to people

completely over analyzes everything you say because he thinks you're the most interesting person he's ever met !! you might as well be evelyn miller !!

to him, you are so unique and precious that he finds himself being overly protective

his protectiveness could a flaw depending on your mood because he never notices that he's smothering you until you're past the point of being overstimulated by the attention.

you made a mistake ? no you didn't, you could never.

would rather watch a man die slowly than let you be confronted, even if you can take up for yourself.

"If he doesn't like your manners he'll be terribly disappointed to find that mine are much worse"

"Don't you dare waste your breath apologizing to anyone, sweet thing."

notices the small things about you like how enthralled you were by the noise his rings make when they brush against a glass or how you hate the feeling of too many eyes on you

you're the only person other than arthur that he feels like he can vent to without being judged.

will listen to you ramble about whatever you're interested in at the moment for as long as your interest lasts. has no problem with you coming up to him to talk about horses for a month straight if he gets to see you happy

Javier

he just thinks you're neat

you have a chest filled with little gifts that he brings you from his trips out of camp because you told him you like collecting things once.

little calm walks through the woods when things aren't going well, and even when they are and you just miss each other's company.

always reminds you to prepare yourself for the loud noise when he feels like he might have to use his gun if loud noises bother you.

"Remember to cover your ears, amor"

because of his own strict morals and passion for what he stands for he appreciates your straightness with what you believe. its easy for him to talk to you because he can trust you to be honest.

loyalty is a huge thing for javier so you can trust him to stand up for you diligently regardless of what it's about

someone made a snide comment ?? dead !

he adores everything you view as a flaw about yourself. from your struggles with putting things in a way that people can swallow easily, to your excitement for whats often seen as mundane.

"That's amazing, amor, tell me more!"

javier is definitely a self-identified romantic and finds ways to romance you even if sometimes you don't pick up on his affections.

always invites you to sit near him around the fire and listen to him play !! every song is for you because he knows you like his music

could not care less about your issues with empathy because he has them too after everything he's been through.

would never force you to feel something you don't or don't understand and reminds you that you're just as caring and lovable as anyone else

John

"You're a bit off, you know?"

will ask you why you do certain things, not to be rude but out of genuine curiosity and a lack of manners.

literally so clueless

thought that you hated him in the beginning and held a grudge that you didn't even know about, but once he realized that you simply expressed emotions differently than most people he warmed up to you over time

he wasn't exactly sure how to approach you even though he was interested and he's NOT at all used to being nervous around people he's interested in

tried and failed to strike up conversations with you numerous times before finally switching up his approach and realizing that small talk wasn't going to get him anywhere with you.

the term autism and it's symptoms weren't recognized medically until much later, there was no term for it which often led to people simply avoiding the topic of your differences or leaving you out completely. john on the other hand was incredibly frank about everything and never tries to convince you that you're just like everyone else. he knows that you're not and so do you, what matters to him is that he loves you just as you are.

gets aggressive when you're overwhelmed, not with you but to everyone else around you. hates seeing you stressed out and it gets him stressed too.

"They said they don't want any bother." when you definitely did not say that

sitting in his tent with him while you both calm down and sweet hugs and comforting words afterwards

only he is allowed to poke fun of you everyone else knows you're off limits

Charles

i like my bitches weird an offputting -charles i think

charles is the first person you think has truly known you without treating you any differently. he didn't speak down to you, or simplify things because he saw you as less intelligent. he spoke to you like a person that was just as capable of everyone else, which you were.

gentle words of encouragement and silent glances of of acknowledgment when you need them. he always know when you need them.

so sweet with you because he knows what it feels like to not belong in more ways than he could even list

"Would you like to join us?"

"I'd like it if you came, you're always welcome with me."

you never feel like he's judging you for not understanding how to talk with others in a conventional way. he understands you in a way you're not used to.

he can always magically tell when you're getting overstimulated and never makes you feel like a burden for it.

sweetest man ever just wants you to be okay !!!!

always shares new things that he's learned with you because he knows you'll appreciate them. loves to tell you all about plants and animals and in return he listens eagerly to whatever hyper fixation you have at the time

you both have a similar social which leads to you spending an unsettling amount of time together

holding hands and sweet kisses when you're both up for it, regardless of who's looking

people in camp talk of course, wondering how something that's not an animal being hunted could capture charles' attention for so long

#arthur morgan x reader #john marston x reader #dutch van der linde x reader #javier escuella x reader #charles smith x reader #dutch van der linde #rdr2 #rdr2 fanfic #arthur morgan headcanons #john marston headcanons #dutch van der linde headcanons #charles smith headcanons #javier escuella headcanons

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qqueenofhades · 10 months

Note

coming from one of those "born in mid 2000s and is now suddenly an adult, making everyone feel old," people, do you have any resources to learn how to bullshit your way through getting a job with zero experience. cause i cant even put like "babysitting" or anything since covid prevented literally any teenage-typical jobs and i kinda dont know what to put on a resume beyond the university im currently attending and the high school i graduated from. and they still dont teach you this in school even though we've complained for years 😭

Okay my chilluns, listen up. This is how to bullshit your way into a basic 1-page resume even if you think you have absolutely dum-dum-diddlysquat to put on it. I completely feel you, as it's hard as hell to get a job even in the ordinary course of things, and especially when everything seems to want 10 years of experience and a bachelor's degree (and still pays like shit). But you gotta be persistent anyway. So here follows the step-by-step guide of How To Resume:

Open a new Word (or other word-processing software of your choice) document.

Pick a nice, professional-looking font (for the love of God, no Comic Sans). Times New Roman is fine; you don't have to overthink it. My own CV is currently in Perpetua, because it's a nice serif that looks crisp and a little different, but it is still clean and readable. Garamond or Cambria or other starter typefaces are fine too. Make sure it is the right size, usually around 12pt.

Put your full name at the top, centered, in BOLD CAPITALS. Increase the typeface size a few more points on this, to make it stand out and to make it take up space.

Underneath this, in regular-sized text, put your contact information: mailing address if you're comfortable sharing it, or if not, at least your phone number and email address. Use a school email if you have it, and not some weird/in-jokey personal email.

Start a new paragraph. In a slightly smaller font (italic if you want to make it look classy) write a few words about yourself. This should be something like I am a [Major] student at [University] looking for a part-time, entry-level position in [sales, retail, office, etc]. A [year] graduate of [High School] in [City, State], I am [prompt, reliable, detail-oriented, mature, friendly, etc] and a hard worker who is eager to gain experience and positively contribute to your business.

Start a new paragraph. Change the alignment from Center to Left. Create a new heading in bold underline labeled Education.

Under this, fill in your education (college first, followed by high school). Include the institution name, city, and state, the year you graduated or expect to graduate, any honors or awards, any extracurriculars, any grade-point averages if they're good (i.e. 3.0 and above), and your expected major in college.

Start a new paragraph. Create another heading: Experience.

This is where you put absolutely anything you can think of (in chronological order, most recent first and counting backward). Did you volunteer for something ever in your life? Put it down! (Title of work, dates, location, brief description of work). Did you do yard work for someone for a weekend? Put it down! Were you (or are you) part of a student club or organization in high school or university? Have you organized or taken part in any local initiatives in your community or neighborhood? Put it down! Basically, absolutely any kind of work, paid or unpaid, that might be relevant, regardless of how long it was or when it took place.

Under that, put the new heading/paragraph Skills and Interests.

Have you worked with Microsoft Word, Outlook, PowerPoint, Adobe, Photoshop? Put it down! People love that shit! Do you use social media and/or know how to work it better than the average grandma? Put 'er down! You get the idea. Think of anything in your daily life that can be put in Job Language and then see if you can do that. You are in university; do you have any projects, papers, or other things that you're proud of? Have you successfully managed a (gasp) group project? Do you make any kind of art? Are you a registered voter who has taken part in civic/political organizations, drives, or events? (If not, REGISTER TO VOTE! This is your angry grandmother speaking). All of that can go down. Even if it's not job experience per se, it's life experience and shows that you are someone who is engaged with the world and working to gain more.

Last paragraph and heading: References. Ask a few trusted adults who know you well and aren't related to you, such as a favorite high school teacher or a university faculty member/degree advisor, if they'd be willing to serve as referees. Put down their full names, titles/place of work, email addresses, and phone numbers.

Voila! You have a full page resume, probably even a little more if you're lucky. Proofread, make sure the spacing is even and the alignment is right, it doesn't look weird, the text is a consistent size, it's all the same color, there are no glaring typos or grammatical errors, etc. etc. Save it as a PDF.

Boom. Done. You are now a Job Hunting Maestro.

If you get an interview, you don't need to pretend that you have tons of experience or that you're something you're not, but you can present what you ARE in a positive light anyway. Don't apologize for yourself or play yourself down pre-emptively; be confident about yourself and what you can offer. You're a college kid looking for your first part-time job, COVID prevented you from a lot of normal teenage work experience, you're willing to work hard and learn new things. Here's your resume. What would be a good time to talk again.

Good luck! I believe in you.

#anonymous #ask #how to adult #how to make a resume

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zoethebitch · 9 months

Note

do you know where I can see that original post abt tumblr live bc all the images have been taken down

no but honestly those screenshots were out of date anyways. the newest Live TOS is from April and those images were from December so if you try to find exactly what the post is referring to word for word it's not there anymore.

the original post can kind of be recreated from the new TOS tho

"for the first part here MEETME talks about how creating an account (downloading) (or having a tumblr account that auto updated to include the tumblr live feature (which is a vast majority of the tumblr mobile population in the US rn)) automatically makes any information they collect visible to any of the partners they have"

"the main important parts to notice from section ii of the privacy policy is the location information limit mobile ad tracking and do not track signals the rest of the section mainly puts the onus of revealing private information that can be used maliciously on the user ie. don't share your password say your full name in a live video where you live etc.

as far as the location information goes what its saying here is that they collect the location information when you first register for tumblr live when you first log in and whenever your phone is on even if youre not using tumblr live

what does it use this information for??? well advertising purposes of course!!!

now they try to get around saying they dont track your location or share it with other users by using this word precise several times now what that means is they have a rough geotag of your location

(your ip address they dont say here its your ip address but in later parts of the document they do in fact say they collect your ip address and if you want an idea how close an ip address can get to your exact location enter your ip address in google maps sometime)

theyre being intentionally vague about that so when you see on the live tab something that says near you you could probably not follow that exactly to said persons house but you can damn well be you will at the very least find their city"

"heres a reminder to all of you who havent most phones now bury in the settings an option to disable adID do it now!!! but remember that TumblrLive can still use all other information they gather they do not at all process do not track signals so you arent safe there and what data would that be that they can collect other than your location and adID??? glad you asked!!!"

"this is a non exhaustive list which means there is DEFINITELY other data they collect about and from you

so they collect:

your email and phone number

any info in your tumblr bio

any metadata connected to any photo youve ever uploaded

adID

ip address

cookies and beacon

which devices you use

which features you use

which pages you visit

which chats you use

anything in your private chats or posts

anything from any connected social media accounts

how well ads are doing

what youre interested in

and in some cases even your biometric information

and what do they do with this information???"

"ads of course

and to give anything they want to cops :)

i dont make this post in order to like ruin peoples fun when it comes to this new feature or to try to talk down to anyone or make anyone feel stupid or anything im not here to make fun of people or belittle anyone but i think its real fucking important people know what privacy rights they are forfeiting by having their phone on right now with this new feature"

I think that's as close as I can get to recreating the whole thing

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rist-ix · 7 months

Note

I have a question for you what do you think of the quote unquote age gap between Bloom and Valtor?

I had to do alot of research to understand Bloom age when I started to like this ship better than Mr cheater. So here's a brief information dump:

Bloom is 16 in the first episode and its confirm her bday is December 10 (we don't know the the exact year when each girl was born only the fact Stella is the oldest by that logic Bloom is the second youngest out of the group) when we get to season 3 it is confirmed that the girls is in their 3rd semester so that makes Bloom 19 at point. Valtor's age we do not know however I'm going to say at most early 20s from what we know Valtor working with a younger Griffin before he got Popsicled.

Here comes the tricky part. In s4 the girls just finished their semester and graduated making them 20-21. Up until s5 where Nicklodeon had to reboot their age making them 16 again. Flashforward to s8 and that makes Bloom age 19 if you are following the reboot or 23 if you do not follow the reboot. Since we don't know how long Valtor been frozen his mental age is up for debate.

For me personally I don't see Sparxshipping as an Edward and Bella situation as Edward was aging naturally during his years while Valtor was frozen and couldn't age naturally but only mentally.

Okay okay first of all! Your Bloom math checks out and I just realized that I for some reason always thought Bloom is 18 in s3. Which is still possible, I think, I just dont know why I assumed that. Actually no, it works, if she is 16 in s1 she is 17 in s2 and 18 in s3, but we dont know a lot about how the school years work in Magix so I'm gonna jot her down as 18-19 for the remainder of this post.

Still dont know how I passed math btw.

Anyway. Valtor's age is where the real mystery is at. We've got two possibilities in my opinion.

1. He's pulling the ageless immortal card.

My personal go-to for fics and discussions. Love me some 300 year old mommy issues. He has too much practice being a messy bitch, there's no fixing this man folks.

Evidence: There's a flashback showing him with Griffin as a tween: she looks MUCH younger, he looks exactly the same. Unless he also stole the secret magic of the world's most potent anti aging cream, or Griffin's proximity to Faragonda just aged her by three more decades, he does not age.

2. He is the age he looks.

Which, in my humble opinion, would not put him anywhere near twenty. That is a grown man. He's not college age, unless you count college professors under that word. Even if I were good at guessing ages the very stylized art style would throw me for a loop, but im gonna say 40s, give or take. Look at Avalon, look at Codatorta, look at King Radius if u must. That is the age range we're looking at.

Evidence: I dont have any. We're ballin'. I guess it's never explicitly stated he's immortal, which you'd think would be big enough of a deal to mention. If u got something feel free to let me know.

That being said, the Winx Club Wiki page for the canon timeline (ha, good one) puts the time of Valtor's creation in a rough time frame from "Over 17 years before season 1" to "Under 100 years before season 6". So he could technically be anywhere from 17-97, though I'm not sure the upper limit is as reliable as the lower one, given the check-list format of the website. So make of that what you will.

Now that we've got the question of age out of the way, lets get to the age gap. I have no idea what the situation in twilight was to be honest, so I cant compare that.

Realistically, there's at least a decade between Bloom and Valtor. Possibly two decades and change. And that is just from visible age, we can add a few centuries on top of that if we're sticking with the immortal bit. I'm gonna be gonest, I dont think being frozen for 17 years will make a whole lot of difference here.

If you find that icky, which is fair, you can always change that for fics tho! Either turn him into a twenty year old or put Bloom in her milf-era, the options are endless. Personally, I think the age difference is half the fun though, and also the least of their issues. When you're off making out with the objectively worst person in history, wether he's too old for her isnt gonna rank very high on people's list of concerns.

#asks #sparxshipping #winx bloom #winx valtor #i think their very obvious gap in knowledge and experience is very intrinsic to their canon dynamic #Bloom being the underdog while Valtor is VERY convinced of his superiority kind of defines the ship for me #and it makes it so much more satisfying when Bloom does put him on his ass

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neuroticboyfriend · 8 months

Text

i want to share an example of my brain on schizophrenia dissociation. this different type of dissociation compare to regular trauma response... and feel like people, even other neurodivergent, no want understand schizos and see us as people. so want experience to be seen. also. i wrote this in moment where things not real to me, so TW for unreality. big big unreality.

I'm floating in the timeline. I've passed the point of no return so many times. I'm just drifting through the universe, tossing my emotions, my struggles, my pains aside. I feel, but it's blunted by the constant disconnect inside me. I feel at peace. There is no tomorrow, but there is. There is, but I don't have to believe it right now - on an emotional level... There is only the choices I make. The way I move my body, every letter I type, every thought I think, pulls me down a different path. Time distorts and follows me, and I follow it. It's like that dance of two galaxies colliding. I will fall asleep eventually, and when I wake up, I will understand that reality really exists. I know that. Logic has not left me, at least, not to the degree that I don't understand I'm strange at the moment... I know, I know, still, sanity prevails over me... Stop feeling, you can't... It's like when people are afraid of dogs. Most dogs won't hurt you, and they can know that, but still feel ineffable fear when faced with a dog. And maybe, even if unlikely, the dog hurts them. It feels like that. Things don't feel real, so they aren't real, for as long as I feel it.

for context, this one *much* more comprehensible out of my schizo rambles. have insight that psychotic. other entries, many pages of same word over and over, of things dont make sense at all, of words that dont exist. but. i hope the sane can see the feeling in this one. i hope you can connect and learn maybe. i think the variety in our experiences, even when we're in pain, is something to revere. (this post is ok to rb)

**please no call me schizo unless also schizo, is slur i reclaim**

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gothhabiba · 1 year

Note

hi! sorry to bother and if you've answered this before. of course, you dont have to answer this. you mentioned in one post that you were still learning Darija and also your posts on scolarship are very interesting. ive been trying for a while to learn my dad's language since i didn't grew up speaking it, but have always been interested in persian literature and the evolution of the language so this has been a difficulty for me. i was wondering if you have any tips on improving the way a language is learned, since you're amazing at explaining things and making even complicated subjects clear.

Thank you and have a nice weekend!

Thanks for the compliment!

I don't think that I have anything like my own original foolproof method for learning languages; this is the first language I've self-taught for which there aren't a lot of materials, and everyone learns differently. Here's what I've been doing & what I can broadly recommend when learning a language for which there isn't an enormous amount of teaching material:

Be specific about what it is that you want to do in the language. Chop this up into small sections. So, instead of "I want to learn [language]" (an enormous, vague, impossible task—even native speakers do not know 100% of their languages), think "I want to be able to understand recipes," or "go to the market or a restaurant," or "make small talk and general conversation," or "text friends and family," or "read literature," or "read theory" (and for those last two goals you might have a waypoint goal of "read storybooks" or "read materials intended for language-learners or children").

I began by learning the Arabic script (resources for this abound, and the abjads used for Persian and Darija only add a few characters), and I always write Darija in this script (even though most people write it in the Latin script) to get practice.

I also learned the standard phonology at this point. But the phonology for Persian and Darija are different and involve fewer consonants than Arabic, since some of them have merged, so you won't need to worry about the Standard or Classic pronunciaton of some of the letters. The Wikipedia page for Persian phonology should be a good resource; the IPA symbols for various sounds are noted, and they have explanations of how the sounds are produced and playback that you can listen to. Note that there are obviously regional variations in phonology, but this is a good start. This is a script with a pretty standard orthography, so at this point you can theoretically pronounce any word you read (with diacritics).

cut for length:

I took inspiration from how I had been taught French and divided information up into "units" (first greetings and introductions; then numbers and colours; then telling time; then time including days of the week and months of the year, words for "today" and "yesterday" &c.; the weather; family; then personal pronouns "I" "you" "me" &c. and the verb "to have" to begin forming simple sentences such as "I have three sisters" or whatever—you'd also want to learn "to be" at this point, but Darija doesn't often use it—then I decided that my first priority after very basic conversation was cooking, so I learned terms for food items and cooking verbs).

If you can find online resources or textbooks that will teach you things in units of this type, all the better (I got started on speakmoroccan.com). If you can't, try following an online course or textbook for learning another common language (such as French, German, Spanish, English) but substitute out the vocabulary terms by using a dictionary (for Darija I used tajinequiparle).

You may be able to find some materials (at least greetings, introductions, numbers and the like) on YouTube—I recommend using these even if you can find these same terms elsewhere, to get practice listening to the language.

I feel that I learn best from textbooks and by understanding the syntax and grammar of sentences in depth. However, the materials I've consulted for Darija (and there aren't too many materials in existence) tend to give lists of words but no grammar, or example sentences that are translated in full with no explanation. Even materials that do go into the grammar (such as the Lonely Planet phrasebook) are targeted at tourists and do so with an ethos of "good enough" that may fudge the details to make them more similar to French (which is the language the book is in). So I write down and compile example sentences that I come across (there's an English/Darija dataset already in existence to help with this kind of thing) and compare them to each other to determine which word means what, which affix might be the marker for past tense or infinitive or the object pronoun or whatever, and write down my guesses to test as I go. This may be more difficult without an education in linguistics, but probably not impossible.

I separate my studying into two phases, which I go back and forth between: creating study materials, and learning from those materials. Creating study materials means finding words and writing them down in my little book, figuring out grammar and writing out the rules, writing down example sentences, and making flashcards to learn vocabulary terms (with one or more example sentences on each one).

Studying from those materials involves running through the flashcards and coming up with new example sentences for each term (so I see the side of the flashcard with the English "banana" and come up with a sentence in Darija that's something like "they have eight yellow bananas"). You could also have flashcards separated by category (pronouns / numbers / verbs / nouns / adjectives) and pick a flashcard at random from a few categories (the selection "I" / "sixteen" / "want" / "new" / "oranges" prompts you to construct and speak the sentence "I want sixteen new oranges" in your target language); this is basically analogue duolingo.

As you go about your day, name objects and colours you see and talk to yourself about actions you undertake; try to 'translate' as many thoughts as you can into your target language.

You can also construct dialogues or short compositions at the end of each "unit" you finish. Write a dialogue between two friends greeting each other after not having seen each other for a while. Write a composition about your family members; explain how they're related to you, what they look like, &c. Look up any vocabulary that you notice you're missing.

Once you have a decent vocabulary base, you'll be able to start reading. If you can find writing that's intended for children or language learners, that's great! There may also be fora or message boards online devoted to conversation in your target language. If you can find a dictionary from the target language to a language you understand, this becomes a lot easier—unfortunately I haven't found one for Darija (the lack of a standardised orthography would probably make one difficult to make). Persian has a history of being written that Darija doesn't, so you may have more luck on this score than I did.

I have an "index" in the back of my little book with abbreviations for each of the sources that I get vocabulary from, and I use these abbreviations to take note of where I got sentences, phrases, and vocabulary terms from (whether dictionaries, textbooks, youtube, online courses, online fora, reddit, academic / linguistic articles, &c.). This is so that I can return to these sources and verify what I've written down, just in case; and also because different vocabulary terms are used in different regions, so it's a good idea to have a way to look up who uses which terms.

If I come across anything by serendipity (whether in an academic article about some sociological aspect of Darija, or in the dictionary I've been using, since there's no complete words list that I can find so serendipity is the only way to discover some of the words that are in it), I write it down then and there regardless of how useful I think it will be to me immediately. This is because I have no way of knowing whether I'll ever come across it again! I don't need to memorise it right away, but maybe I'll want to learn it later.

I don't think this will help you, but for some minority languages or dialects there may be a colonial language other than English in which materials for that language are easier to access (for example, I tend to search for Darija resources in French, not English).

#Anonymous #questions #Darijaposting

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the-kr8tor · 7 days

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Woo today's my momma's birthday! I apologise if this is short because of it lol Daily Hobie HC! Hobie would be the most gorgeous muse- like he looks good every angle. Your sketchbook is filled with multiple unfinished and finished scribbles of this gorgeous man, and he doesn't mind it at all. He likes seeing the way you'll glance up at him with a small smile as he rambles on about any possible projects he's thinking of pursuing while both of you have hot cocoa, with yours still only having been drank half-way on the bedside table. Hobie knows you're listening by the way you're still able to ask relevant questions, pointing out any possible flaws in his projects when he asks for feedback on his plan so he can completely proof it. All while, your pencil works flawlessly (flaw-fully, in your mind) on your page, outlining every detail, working to add shading and lighting to your messy sketch of him. You look up momentarily, staring closely at his eyes. It flusters him whenever you do so, but he's learned to press it down and keep his nonchalant demeanor..for now. He admires the way you can depict him so perfectly on page, whether your reference is a photo on your phone, or just him moving around and talking. He loves the way you manage to get all the details, such as his dimples whenever he beams at you, or just the way his nose slightly scrunches up when he's slightly groggy. Although you dont have a full proper sketch, he notices your little doodles in the corners of the pages, usually showing him in some more extravagant action that you aren't ready to do a detailed sketch of. Either way, he loves every single one of your pieces, and he will always feel honored that you love to use him as your muse. His favourite piece of yours is one you swear to burn every time you see it..yet it's still in one piece. You had tried to sketch him out playing his guitar, yet it didn't meet your standards. Hobie had to practically pickpocket it out of your hands to prevent you from ripping it. He keeps it as a folded note somewhere hidden in his room, teasing you with it whenever you come to hang out. Every time you draw him, he's learned that he can't properly get how much he loves it across to you with words, so he immediately goes to attack your face with big kisses, not stopping until he hears your laughter and you surrendering, admitting that it's good. AAAAAAAAA- -🐦‍⬛

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO 🐦‍⬛ ANON'S MOM!!! Tell her Happy birthday for me and I wish her lots of 🎂🎂🎂 💕

Daily Hobie HC!!!

This reminds me sm of my older artist! Reader fic right here!!! (I ate here ngl) I bet this is what happened after it!

This is so cute!!!!! I honestly think he'd subtly stop what he's doing and pose for you once he realizes you're drawing him 🥺🥺🥺

Oh him loving every piece of art you do even though you don't has me all 🥰🥰😍😍 (his hand in marriage pls) and Him keeping it all to himself?! 😭😭😭😭😭😭 I bet he has it all in one box for safekeeping

#ask answered #chatting with lovelies #🐦‍⬛ anon #hobie thoughts #hobie headcanons #🫶🫶🫶

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lucy90712 · 1 year

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HIhi i am new on your page and I had a few requsts if you dont mind first one being gavi x volleyball reader where the reader is 2 years younger than him and goes to a sports special hs. If possible could you make the reader a libero where through out a match they are are just diving and going crazy and gettign hurt

A/n: I changed it up a bit hope that's ok. Also I don't feel comfortable making the reader younger than Gavi so they are the same age in this

wc: 1.9k+

For as long as I remember I have been playing volleyball so when I finally turned 18 I took the opportunity to play volleyball full time. It was the best decision I have ever made as in just a few months I have been accepted into a team and now play games most weekends. I have been loving the whole professional sports lifestyle because although training most days and games every weekend is a lot my schedule matches up with my boyfriends so we get to spend more time together. The only downside is that we both usually end up playing on the same days so we never get to watch each other play. In fact he has never been able to go to one of my games so has only ever seen me play in the odd game at school which is nowhere near the same.

Tonight that changes though because Pablo is suspended from the Barcelona game for having too many yellow cards so he promised me that he would come and watch me play instead. It means the world to me that he's coming to watch me play because he could go to the stadium and watch his team which I know he would really want to do but instead he has chosen to come and watch my game. He told me that he wants to have the full experience so we agreed for him to come with me to the game so he can watch the whole warm up and everything before we play (I don't play volleyball so this is probably wildly incorrect I'm sorry). Knowing he was coming with me made me feel better too because I want to make sure he's alright and doesn't get bombarded by people as everyone in this city seems to know who he is.

Just as I finished packing my bag with everything I need there was a knock on my door so I ran to open it knowing it would be Pablo. On the other side of the door stood Pablo with a big smile on his face which usually means he's done something but I couldn't work out what he possibly could have done when he's only just arrived. I let him in and he followed me to my bedroom to grab my bag but as we went to leave he stopped and grabbed something out of the bag he had brought with him. I was so confused until he took the shirt he was wearing off and put on a new one which was a volleyball jersey with my name and number on the back. He had the biggest smile on his face still and this time I couldn't help but do the same. Knowing he went out of his way to get a jersey to support me nearly made me cry but I held it together and instead of crying I just gave him a big hug while he kissed the top of my head.

Before we left we had to take pictures together but after that I drove us to where the game was being held and brought Pablo along with me to show him around. I showed him the court first and then we went around the back and I showed him all the rooms including where the locker room was which is where I left him to go and get changed. When I came back out he was waiting for me right outside so I introduced him to my teammates who have all been begging to meet Pablo as I always talk about him and some of them didn't believe that I was actually dating a famous footballer but I proved them wrong. We all did our warm up with Pablo watching from the sidelines where he will be watching the game from because I got permission from the coaches so that he wouldn't have people bugging him.

Like always I got incredibly nervous before the game and usually I have to start playing to calm down but today Pablo was there to keep me calm. While we waited to head out onto the court he held my hand and kept whispering encouraging words in my ears which really help my nerves. I'm so used to being the one calming Pablo down before big games that it was weird to have him do the same for me but I love having him here it motivates me to play better just so he can see me at my best. He held my hand right up until the last second and only let go after giving me one last kiss.

Tonight we are facing the best team in the league and being the libero of the team it means I'm going to have a lot to do. As soon as the game started I had to dive to rescue the ball as the rest of the team missed it which is not what I was expecting so this game is going to be harder than I first thought. I was constantly having to run and dive for the ball throughout the first two sets but it was completely worth it because we actually won those sets which no one really expected especially against our opponents. For the start of the third set I was rested and another defensive player was put in which I was fine with but we were losing a lot more points than before and it was stressing me out to just watch from the sidelines. It wasn't long before I was put back in to help rescue the set in hopes that we could win the match.

Things were going a lot better until a player from the other team smashed the ball over the net and right over our defence which meant it was my job to try and reach the ball. From where I was standing the ball was a little out of my reach but I tried my best and I just about got to it before another player accidentally moved backwards to receive the ball and stood on my ankle. Just standing on my ankle would have been ok but the way my foot was placed meant that when the girl stood on it my ankle rolled the complete wrong way to the point that I heard something pop. The entire crowd seemed to fall silent in the moment as I got back up and tried to continue playing it hurt so much but we were about to lose the set so I tried to keep going. After trying to move for the ball again I just collapsed straight to the floor as the pain was far too much to even keel walking.

After sitting on the floor for a few seconds I tried to get back up to walk off myself but I stopped when Pablo came over and picked me up instead which I was very thankful for. Under instruction from the coaches he carried me straight to the medical room for me to be examined. The medical staff went straight to looking at my ankle which meant having to move it around which sent waves of pain up my leg. It was so painful that I had to hold onto something and the first thing I found was Pablo's hand so I grabbed it and squeezed it whenever I felt another wave of pain. When finally the doctors were done with their exam I relaxed a little bit until they told me that I would be out for a few months as I'd torn almost all the way through the ligament. They put a brace on my ankle and gave me crutches to use for the next few weeks at least before leaving me alone with Pablo in the room.

"I'm sorry love I know what it's like to be injured and not be able to play but you were amazing out there and knowing you you'll only come back stronger" he said trying to make me feel better

"Thank you but it sure doesn't feel that way right now" I said

"I know and it won't for a while but I promise you that you will get back to playing before you know it and you'll be more motivated than ever" he said

"I just feel so bad the team need me out there those other girls are tough we all need to be at our best to beat them and I've let them down" I said

"Now that's not true you haven't let them down at all you got injured and still tried to keep playing you did your best plus you just got a text saying the team won so it's ok" he told me

Knowing we had still won made me feel a lot better but I still wanted to go home and relax so I went to grab my crutches so that we could leave but Pablo grabbed them for me and picked me up again. He carried me to the locker room and grabbed my stuff for me and I got the chance to see the team to congratulate them on the win and tell them about my injury. We all had a moment as a team before I left them to celebrate while Pablo helped me to the car. Luckily he has his learners license so I told him to drive safely because he is allowed to drive with me in the car but I still want to avoid any drama on the way home. Usually Pablo is stubborn and thinks he’s always right but on the way back he listened to everything I told him about where to go and how to drive and we made it back in one piece although I was very stressed the entire time.

When he helped me inside I expected him to leave to go and do whatever he usually does on a Sunday evening but instead he made sure that I had everything I would need and was comfortable before sitting down next to me. He ordered some food for us while I turned on the tv to put the game on as the second half had not long started. Like always Pablo got so involved in the game even though he wasn’t playing but he still checked in on me and went to get the food when it arrived which is how I know he really cares about me as generally nothing can distract him from football but somehow I’ve managed it.

For the rest of the night Pablo stayed by my side and even got his mum to drop his things off so that he could stay the night. Even though I can do things for myself he still helped me whenever he could which included doing my skincare for me and he only left me when I went in the shower although he did make a few jokes about it. When we got in bed Pablo let me get comfortable before moving to get as close to me as he possibly could because he always has to be touching me whenever we are together even in our sleep. Just as I was falling asleep Pablo pressed some gentle kisses to my face and whispered how much he loved me in my ear before settling down again like nothing had happened which made me fall asleep with a big smile on my face.

#pablo gavi imagine #pablo gavi imagines #gavi imagines #gavi imagine

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theasterous09 · 6 months

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OKAY SO ABOUT THAT 2-PARTER RC9GN EPISODE DREAM I HAD

This was a really long time ago, so I may or may not have some of it right, but I can still remember the most memorable parts of my dream.

EPISODE 1

So it started with me opening my TV to see what's new on the Disney channel, I don't remember what I was trying to look for, but then I saw this teaser of an RC9GN 2-parter special episodes thing and I literally screamed, no joke.

The teaser was like a countdown to the 2 episodes, so I waited for a few more minutes or smt

So anyways, the theme song started playing and I remember singing along with it, going batshit crazy

Then the song ended and the episode starts with Randy in class, bored out of his mind. The teacher (a new one, I can't remember what she looks like, but I know she's a woman) was teaching about whatever

I dont know what else happened in this episode, but skip to the part where a robot attacks and Randy is going ninja. I can't remember what it looks like, but it wasn't a robo-ape.

The Ninja is there to destroy it, yelling quips and puns, the usual

But the part I remember so much was the end of that episode, so this robot was trying to hit the Ninja, but missed, leading the robot to hit the school instead. Hard.

So the part of the building where the robot hit collapsed and there were students there just before the part of the building fell on them.

For a split-second, we can see Randy's absolute dread and tried to reach out to the kids, but he couldn't reach them on time and the bulding fell on top of them.

Absolute silence followed soon after. I can remember how shocked I was on this part, my jaw dropped because I DIDNT KNOW DISNEY WOULD ALLOW THAT

And then the episode ended. Just like that.

ANYWAY EPISODE 2 (I REMEMBER THIS EPISODE THE MOST)

So we ended with a cliffhanger on the first episode, and my mouth was still wide open.

Disney gave me a break and a commercial started

But then after that the next episode started, and there wasn't even a theme song

The episode showed the Ninja trying to reach out on the kids again, but he couldn't make it. There was a heartbeat sound effects going on in the background making it more suspenseful

Anyway, the Ninja went to dig them out of the collapsed rubble, and miraculously, the students lived

So randy asked if they were okay, and I kid you not, he sounded genuinely terrified and concerned

The students had minor bruises, while one of them had an dislocated arm, but they were alive and that was what mattered to Randy at that moment.

Randy got them out of there and he made sure they got out of harm's way before he went back to the robot

Fastforward to the aftermath of the destroyed robot, (this is probably my fav part cuz it was just so ANGSTY) Randy took off the ninjasuit in the boys' bathroom and he just sat there for a minute

The heartbeat soundtrack was back, but faster, and I can see on screen that Randy was also starting to hyperventilate as he processed what happened and what almost happened to those students

I can't remember what else happened then, but i think Howard found him or something and tried to calm him down

anyway, when randy did calm down, he took the nomicon out of his bag, with howard by his side, and asked "What would happen if I failed them? Was there ever a ninja that had to deal with what almost happened?"

The nomicon shloomped him in the book and Randy had a deep conversation with Finja (AGAIN IT SUCKS THAT I CANT REMEMBER THIS PART BECAUSE I KNOW IT WAS SP GOOD)

Randy sat on the dirt (its kind of like dirt? I mean, its a page of the nomicon but whatever) with tears streaming down his eyes. Finja is there, just, rubbing his back and comforting him because Finja knows what he's going through, he's been there and worse, he's seen his comrades fall in front of him and he knew that it was a painful feeling

Silently, randy told Finja (in my own words cuz i cant remember how he actually said it "What if those students... will an even greater chaos happen if I failed them? Can I still be a ninja if I failed to protect them?"

And finja replied with smt like "Ninja... you are one of the best ninjas I ever had the privilege to meet. You saved me from giving up on fighting, you saved many people by defeating the sorcerer and bringing peace to Norrisville. You saved the Sorcerer from his eternal curse and freed his soul. If anyone is going to fail at being the ninja, then it is not you. Yes, it was a close call for those defenseless students, but they are still alive and well and you need not think of the possibility of what might have happened. So do not be hard on yourself, Ninja."

More tears and more hurt/comfort ensues and I think the episode ended with randy leaving the nomicon and having a more peaceful mind.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAaaHHHHhhhHHHHHHH I CANt BELIEVE I STILL REMEMBER MOST OF THIS DREAM, NOW I WANT TO MAKE A FANFIC OUT OF IT (with probably a few eensy-teensy changes)

#rc9gn #rc9gn randy #rc9gn howard #randy cunnhingham #fanfiction #rc9gn first ninja #rc9gn nomicon #rc9gn dream #dreams #it was a long time ago so i forgot some things #but i swear this is one of my fav dreams #i cant believe my mind could do this #i wrote this w/o caring so much abt punctuation #or typos or grammars

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bettsfic · 10 months

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Hi betts! Ive been finding your posts really motivating, they make me want to write more and more. So id really appreciate if you could give me advice for this problem!

I just dont know how to revise! Or maybe the problem is that i dont know how to write drafts that need revising.

Basically what happens is that i write a draft as fast and messily as i can. And then i reread it, and i really like it! So when i get around to fixing it up, i end up chopping out things just based off of vibes. And then i read that version, and i hate it! It shows a lot more technical skill for sure, and it coheres a lot more, but i feel that its completely lost its voice and style. I tend to write in fits of emotion, and i feel like any revising outside of that mindset just sort of... strips the text of its sincerity?

Where do i go from here? Its not easy to practice revision when its so disheartening!

When i attempt to write badly, it either turns out good enough that im scared to change it, or bad enough that im not interested in it anymore.

How do i revise a draft without removing the things i like about it? Do i just need to get better at identifying what i like about my work?

that's an interesting situation, anon. i guess my immediate question is, if you like what you write, why do you even want to revise?

in the 50s, the beats popularized this idea of "first thought, best thought," which basically means what goes on the page is what belongs there, and the first words that come to us are the right ones, not because they're good, but because they're first.

for your own purposes, for the sake of discovery, i think this is a great mentality. the process of invention is the purest practice of creativity. you're putting things on a page that weren't there before, and if you're doing that in a way you find satisfying, and if you're pleased with the results, then i think you should keep doing it. it seems to me like your willingness to revise and your ability to say, "no, i liked it better before," will naturally develop into a more dedicated revision practice. eventually you'll write the thing that makes you go, "wait a minute, that's not right," or maybe, "i like this, but it doesn't quite honor the story i want to tell." and those are the seeds of revision.

don't get me wrong, i'm a firm believer in revision. but more than that, i'm a believer in letting your joy guide you in any creative process. revision should feel good. you should want to revise. you may not always be eager to revise, but you should feel strongly enough about the nature of what you're creating that making it better will make you feel better. but if you don't want to revise, then you shouldn't feel obligated to.

still, if you want to get a sense of what revision can do to your work so that you can experiment and grow, i would recommend writing something short, maybe a thousand words or fewer. then put it down for a week, and rewrite it without looking at it again. put that down for a week too. then rewrite it a third time without looking at either previous draft.

when you have all three drafts, try to look at them with a discerning eye. which one overall is best and why? or if you can't tell, go through and highlight all the sentences you like and count them. whichever story has the most highlights wins.

sometimes revision isn't always about making something better. sometimes it's about approaching your work so many different ways that you've conceived all possible angles and chosen the one that's best. sometimes the first thought really is the best thought. but sometimes it's the fifth thought, or the tenth, or one that someone else has to bring to your attention. i think if you broaden your definition of revision to be "considering every way this thing can be written," it'll help guide you toward a process that works for you.

#writing advice #revision #.

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frankiistein · 5 months

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ok time to do my usual breadpost of the christmas chapter, even if its a bonus chapter i think it points to some rly neat stuff 🤔

first things first. matching hairclips <333

i rly love the lineless style used in this page (tbh it influenced my last art of sar its such a nice look and smthng i should do more often myself). also the cookie at the center is the generic demon clipart from ch4

bonbien nation is having a christmas miracle tonite ‼️ seeing their human-ish forms is always so cool and also i love the little detail of bien wagging his tail there lol

the idea of them decorating the cookies morbidly to make use of bien breaking all the cookies is rly cute and i think its nice to see bon sort of just working around bien like that hehehe

but anyway time for the evil part of the comic

almost missed this but this cookie resembles reception (ear muff, green eye and mouth) and we already know bien is probably gonna fight reception eventually so 🤨

SAR MENTIONED!!!!! my evil unwilling kinnie boiii

its fascinating that he becomes more polish anselirian each update, i think his love for his culture leads some more evidence to the idea of marginals being cultural colonizers. the chapter already defines oplatek which i searched more of, the definition he gives is accurate and its a polish catholic tradition. (also its interesting that poland is mostly catholic because maldevara, which is said to be loosely based on the philippines is also a catholic country, i wonder if catholic imagery gets more significant later). besides the oplatek his outfit seems to be based on traditional polish costume (the female costume ofc)

the format is similar to i1-p5rd but with more art, as in instead of sar speaking "in comic" his words are in prose. similar to i1-p5rd too bien doesnt speak at all (in fact i just realized even in the part with bon he also doesnt speak, which iirc its the first comic in breadavota without dialogs) we also still dont see what bien looks like, the atmosphere of sar taking control of bien feels perpetuated here again from how we know bien is there and we can assume he CAN still talk because sars dialogs show him responding to things bien said but we never get to see bien himself

Judges don't celebrate any holidays, so I haven't actually celebrated anything with anybody since my mother died.

sar mom mentioned again, almost thought this was new but remembered she was mentioned in the study paper in i1-p5rd

the drawing in i1-p5rd had the same glitchy bg effects but i thought it was stylistic for that illustration, but them being used again in this chapter implied this might have to do more with how bien perceives the world itself. like look at that chair those r a fucking minecraft chair

interestingly, the bg in i1p5 also has a somewhat glitchy appearance albeit it still looks "drawn" (unlike in the newer drawings where they look more pixellated). the narration in i1-p5 itself does directly state that the world "sounds" weird to bien with things specifically he describes colors as "grating" and things looking "scratchy" which fits how to describe the stylistic differences in this drawings compared to most of breadavotas art.

ignore shitty yt quality but sar himself looks the same as the background but without the blur, and in the narration bien says sar is the clearest thing in the room. its notable that after the unseen Spinal Cord Surgery sar became rendered in the usual cleaner art style of the bread illustrations but the background became even "scratchier" with more "grating" colors. makes u think

the oplatek shows probably mary and jesus which is a usual picture printed on oplateks. idk if on purpose but i think its intersting that sar specifically splits between the mother and the son here

on top of that, sar also specifically eats the piece with the son and gives the piece with the mother to bien. eating already is a minor but consistent theme in breadavota, like for bread consuming the "breadlings" and getting the power to use their body parts, or with marginals learning how to reconstruct what they "consume" eating in breadavota fits some traditional beliefs in cannibalism where its said that its a way to "absorb" attributes of the person ur eating. on top of that for the marginals at least eating is also treated as an act of obsessive love, w/ anthony repeatedly shown to take after media/marginals as a whole most likely from living around them since he was a kid he would definitely be aware of this and it fits his yandere like vibes alot tbh

the symbolism of bien eating the mother (or in his case probably symbolizing bon) is very curious. thinking emoji times one millions

Say "ah!"

literally two words but love this line for two reasons: one is it continues the tradition of sar telling bien to say __ in a funny way but also it implies sar didnt even give the wafer for bien to eat but he FED it to him. hes so normal

#breadavota #bonbien cannibalism scene when

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frstcorinthians · 3 months

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fic writer ask !

thank youuu @almost-a-class-act !!

How many works do you have on AO3? just six! i haven't been posting for long

What's your total AO3 word count? roughly 48.6k

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 1. graveyard shift - which still surprises me lmfao it's the oldest one i have so i guess it makes sense?? the people are clamoring for fun retail worker content 2. cowboy cassanova - i still dont think i spelled that correctly. alas. jake seresin nation rise up 3. rest your head one more time - and here comes rooster with the steel chair! 4. maybe everything that dies someday comes back - i Will get this to the number one spot its literally the best thing ive ever written and ive barely started 5. angels that have no place - coming in clutch, my most recent fic

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? YESSS i love them i always reply they make my heart very full

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? i think the answer has to be the half-dozen ive left fully unfinished. nothing more depressing than that

What the fic you've written with the happiest ending? probably angels, given that it's the only one i actually finished. winning by default, it would seem

Do you write crossovers? i don't currently but there's still time. i'm not opposed to it!! i just havent gotten around to it yet

Have you ever received hate on a fic? nope! there's still time

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? i do lmfao i don't think its very good?? but its usually surrounded by at least a semblance of plot

Have you ever had a fic stolen? not yet. there'd better not be time for this one.

Have you ever had a fic translated? no, unfortunately!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? also no but....if anyone's out there......

What's your all-time favorite ship? OH MANNNN i don't even know

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will? rosary-strung, my weird nonsensical self-indulgent sandman fic. maybe once season 2 comes out i'll get sucked back into it? it needs some serious reshaping and revision to make it make sense at all, though

What are your writing strengths? i think i'm good at describing feelings! i think i tend to use weirdly specific metaphors and sensations when i describe them, so i think it sticks in the mind well.

What are your writing weaknesses? i'm bad at getting everything i'm thinking/picturing out onto the page, as in i'll make some jumps that make sense to me because i can see the whole picture in my head, but i forget to put them down onto paper, so the reader is like "what..just happened"

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? i wouldn't dare, unless it's like a canonical thing a character does? like if its a term of endearment or something, that's a thing real people i know in real life do sometimes, so it wouldn't seem so out of place i think.

What was the first fandom you wrote for? wayyyy back when in elementary school i wrote REAMS of h*rr* p*tt*r fanfiction. in my defense i was in north carolina and ten.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to? the pacific! i'm finally watching it now and there's a lot more to chew on and wrestle with, which is...maybe not a thing for fic to do; or maybe it's the thing only fic can do. we'll see. also mota because some ocs have wandered into my mind and won't leave. they also won't pay rent help

What's your favorite fic you've written? my nebraska fic, hands down. its my baby my everything my darling my firstborn. i love her and she loves me.

i will humbly tag @venus-haze @blood-mocha-latte @shoshiwrites and @latibvles !! if you've already been tagged my apologies it's late late late in north carolina

#aleks.txt #whew this one was a doozy and also a fun trip down memory lane #aleks.chat

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