#there's another story i need to write a date chapter for but I haven't been able to write actual romance for about a year now
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It's been more than 20 years and for some reason I feel that Gosho hasn't given Kaiao any development, how can more than 20 years pass and Aoko dynamics, relationship and feelings remain the same? At this point I feel like Gosho is just going to make them date because "they already liked each other" they remain in the same status quo
Hey, if we go by DC romance progress, they've been going too fast. We've already had suspicion of identity chapters, and that didn't happen until more than 400 chapters in DC. /j
Since heists have taken over any character development recently, I don't even know if Kaito and Aoko will even get any romantic progress. Maybe the actual identity confrontation will happen down the line, since that's thief drama, but atm, it really wouldn't surprise me if they only ask each other on a real date at the very end of the manga.
Like. I'm sure Gosho would love to make MK a love drama as well, but he writes MK so rarely, and usually as hype for something Kid related in other media. So the MK stories tend to be heavy on drama that can only take place at Kid heists. (To the point that the new chapters just. Use Kid as the plot device to show off a new character. Even Hakuba's never gotten so much 'look at this character being a detective' treatment in MK.)
-sighs- I just feel bad for MK as a series at this point. I like the characters, I like the general story idea, but. It's been going down a very steep hill with Gosho wanting things exciting, but not wanting any real progress in. Anything. But unlike old MK, the new stories aren't even nice standalone setpieces of story, they're... mundane. They could be high stakes, if you purely look at the scenarios on paper, but. We all know nothing's gonna happen to Kid. Nothing even happens to him when the actual bad guys show up, much less one-time antagonists.
We need actual character focus and development, not heist drama. Badly. Not even romance, though that'd be a nice change. Just any character expansion of our limited cast of characters. Gosho wants big, all the time, meaningless big stuff, when small would be so nice.
#And also he probably won't care to expand on KaiAo when he knows it's already canon#Like; not in the same way that ShinRan is canon endgame and he just needed to write it out#But in a 'I said these two were dating in another manga; they will exist even if I haven't written it'#And his story atm does feel like it could be left off with an ambiguous note on if they're together or not#And then just leave them dating in Yaiba for people who care about confirmation#MK is not in a stable enough state; I really don't know what he's planning with anything#And it's been so. -gestures to all the 'meaningless big stuff'- lately#I don't know if it'll ever get any shift in focus in the future#We barely get anything; all we have now is a new character people are divided about#And the tiniest continuity of Aoko thinking to herself that Kid is teasing her by reminding her of Kaito#Like; part of the problem is continuity as well; at least if Gosho wants to stick with DC-ish MK#MK has all the potential for callbacks or returning characters that could be interesting#But none of the potential that fans enjoy is ever /used/#We got all our KaiAo up front. We have suspicion arcs where it's barely mentioned that Kaito's proven his innocence in the past#They could go back to the amusement park and Aoko could mention the movie and Kaito can be sweating#Because he never saw the movie; that's then he peaced out to go heisting#There's so much. Gosho's good at adding potential to his story#But everything he comes up with to make canon ends up disappointing because he never fully uses any of it#He just adds more and more elements that go nowhere#MK is a mess that gets more and more fun to play around in; but the actual chapters are. Bad#Which might be for a reason similar to DC of we wait so long and get something extremely meh#Except instead of the months between DC cases; it's years for MK; and DC fans complain the entire time#So when MK fans are fed crumbs of... anything. It's just not as enjoyable as new content should be#(I got rambly in tags; sorry ;._. )
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03: Barbie and the Giftshopist.
Steven Grant x f!bimbo!reader.
previous part. series masterlist. next part.
03. Everyday she wears pink.
(A/n: your feedback on the last chapter about me writing the moon knight system is so amazing tysm! i referenced mpgis here and more legally blonde. i wanna note that reader has been a lawyer for a couple years now and amazing at it 🤸♀️ btw update tags are open!)
warnings: mention of cock, swearing and cursing, mention of blood.
the cock line is from my bubs @ominoose ily
"This isn't just a date. This is a date!" You told yourself as you threw random articles of clothing behind you as you hunted for a specific dress.
You thought maybe you shouldn't wear pink. Maybe you have a pretty dress he hasn't seen you in.
You barely slept due to excitement.
The way he talked and looked at you made you swoon over him. Just thinking about makes you-
You squealed as your leg involuntarily kicked up. You blinked twice in confusion "That is so weird..."
Maybe you were horny.
"Oh gosh, not again. Bad leg!" you scolded your beautiful leg as it kicks up again "Down girl, down! No nasty thoughts about... about... about the hot neighbor across us- no!"
You almost moaned at the though of his lips against yours... You shuddered as you kept remembering the way he looked at you. You laid down in the pool of clothing as you imagined how your little lunch date will go.
As usual, you two walked out of your flat at the same time, discussing where the two of you were going for lunch.
"Wetherspoons..." you parked your pink corvette outside, looking at the flowers decorating the place. Your high heels clicked on the pavement as you walked inside, still in your pink work suit despite planning on changing.
It was a busier day than you thought, but of course lunch time is important.
Your eyes lit up as you spotted Steven, sitting up rather stiff "Stevie!" you smiled as you walked over to his table "Hi, so sorry I'm a bit late. Traffic and all."
But Steven looked back at you with such a loving look in his eyes "It's alright, love. I haven't been waiting long."
The truth is, he thought you weren't gonna show up.
"Have you ordered yet? Gosh, you must be starved." you opened the menu and browsed.
"I haven't." he shook his head, opening his menu as well.
"Cross examination was a success." you smiled "Next week's the next trial with the witness."
Steven didn't know what you were talking about, it was out of context "That's great!" he responded.
"So then he was like no and I was like, you are. Then he was like no but then I was like you are! And he was like, I kinda am. So long story short he's like, totally gay." you said as you looked at your compact mirror.
"Thank gosh I figured it out, because no way can he say my Chanel is so last season when his shirt is so last year. My client was totally bugging, but we figured it out and I, like, totally won that. How about you, Stevie? How's your day?"
Steven smiled back at you "T'was alright, love. Just the usual." he says sarcastically "Donna's been a real-"
"Excuse my language— Bitch? Cunt? Pain in the ass?"
He chuckles "Yes. A pain in the arse, love."
"She always sounds like she's giving you a hard time. You sure you don't want me to talk to her?"
"I don't think it's lawyer-worthy. It's really alright, love." Steven shakes his head "Just another typical day."
"Yeah, which can be classified as workplace abuse."
"Really. I'm fine."
You press your glossy lips into a thin line before sighing "Alright. But if you need someone to represent you in court, I'm your girl." you playfully winked at him.
Steven blushed before nodding "I'll keep you in mind then." a waiter comes up to the two of you and he began to order "-and a cocktail. Uh, how about you?"
"Um, I'll have the Soup of the Day with half a baguette, and Pasta Pomodoro with salmon. And— wait did you say a cocktail?" you blinked twice at Steven "I'll have a cocktail too, thank you."
You smiled at the waiter as he repeated the order to you two before walking away.
"Jeez, Stevie. It's only lunchtime." you giggled at him.
"I-I just wanted something strong."
"Work's really stressful, huh?"
"It really is." he sighed "Working late again tonight. But this uh lunch date is really cheering me up."
Your cheeks felt hot, making you smile "That's so sweet... tell you what, I'll pick you up from work tonight again. I'm working late too anyways."
It was Steven's turn to blush. His hand shakes with his head "You're way too nice. I don't wanna bother you. It's quite overwhelming too." even his ears turned red.
"Steven, you shouldn't turn away blessings." you winked as you giggled. Your cocktails were served just a few minutes later.
"I haven't had a cock in a while."
Steven felt his drink rush to his nose and he quickly grabbed a napkin. He coughs a few times before looking up at you.
"Oopsies, I meant a cocktail." you covered your mouth, smiling "Well, I mean... I haven't had that in a while either."
You took a sip of the drink and Steven stared at the lipstick mark left on the edge of the glass. You always wore a certain shade of lipstick, and it always drove him crazy.
There were times he'd imagine smudging your lipstick... in more ways than one.
After lunch, the two of you laughed as you drove to the museum. Steven just kept falling more and more into your wonderland of pink and diamonds. He stared at you with half-lidded eyes, listening to every word you said.
The thing about Steven is that he loves to ramble and talk a lot, and so do you. He knew you were perfect.
"-and I was like, thank gosh I talked her out of buying an orange chiffon scarf. It doesn't suit her spring tones at all! There's a fine line between terracotta and brown."
That evening, your pink corvette was parked outside of the museum, waiting patiently for Steven after a long day of reading case papers. You puckered out your lips to reapply some lipstick before popping and smiling at your reflection.
Your freshly manicured nails tapped on the steering wheel while humming a small tune.
Then suddenly someone knocks on your window.
"Steven?"
He looked like he was roughed up, red staining his clothes, but it's not his blood. It didn't even look like the same clothes he was wearing during your lunch date.
"Oh my gosh, Steven-"
...but that's actually not your main concern.
"-I told you, blue and black as a combo is a total crime against fashion. If it were me, I'd make it law." you groaned, opening the locks of your car "Get in."
His eyes widened but he doesn't respond, only taking the passenger's seat like you commanded.
"Oh, you have a little stain there." you pat the patch of blood using a pink handkerchief with lace trim and your name embroidered on the corner.
He continued to stare at you as you took his hand and placing your handkerchief on his palm "Here. You can give it back to me some other time because I seriously I need to take you shopping this weekend."
You thought maybe he's always tired after work, that's why he's so quiet, like yesterday.
"Maybe I can figure out your color palette so I know what looks best on you. Your shirts are cute, I'd have to admit, but some of them are... meh. No offense but some prints are worse than the last. OH! I know, we'll do a whole shopping day on the weekend. An hour or so won't cut it. I know it's your weekend off, but trust me when I say when your pretty neighbor's a fashionista, your life is gonna change."
Steven looks at you from the mirror's reflection before shifting his eyes towards the body— Jake. Unlike Marc's creepy silent behavior from the night before, Jake actually looks at you as you went on and on.
He even responds with small nods.
"Can we not make this a habit? First it's Marc pretending to be me in front of her, now it's you. I don't need your help with her. Can I please go in my own pace?" Steven tells Jake, but Jake shook his head in a not now kind of motion.
As Jake entered the apartment after waving goodnight to you, he's met with a poor attempt of a glare from Steven "Don't look at me like that, you wanted the girl so I gave it a push."
"I want to do this on my own. Marc doesn't want me to, I don't know about you, but I don't need help. Can I please do it my way? It's all I ask."
"Can you ask her out?"
Steven pressed his lips into a line before letting out a sigh "Give me the body. I'll... try."
"Alright, alright. You go on ahead."
Steven, now in control of the body, swung open the door and he sees you struggling to find your keys. You blinked twice before smiling at him "Hi again, Stevie. My keys are just- ugh, a lot." your keychains jingle as you tried to find the right key.
"Can we go on a date after shopping this weekend?" he blurts out quickly. Steven was red as a tomato "D-Dinner date."
Your eyes lit up and you felt the butterflies in your stomach again "I'd love that! I'll just- oh! I found my key!"
And you also found the key to your locked-up heart.
UP NEXT: the best weekend ever! a date with steven and a little breaking and entering 💅
tags: @red-hydra @monsterroonio @pastelpinkpilatesprincess @letmehavemyfictionalmen @uncle-eggy @superduckmilkshake @3zae-zae3
#moon knight#steven grant#jake lockley#marc spector#x bimbo!reader#x reader#x you#bimbo reader#moon knight system
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This is my first, so bare with me I'm adjusting. Honestly reading stories of Ghost x Reader won me over so here's my little idea of Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader, I'm hoping to make this a series and learn as I go. This been sitting in my drafts for like....ever and I feel it's about time to share my efforts. Enjoy !
Safe With a Ghost
+18 Readers Only
Chapter One : You're Mine...
Summary of this Series : Dating Ghost has it's ups and downs, you both are busy with your jobs(you work at the ER) . Some days it takes a toll on you during his leaves. You live peacefully nonetheless and always happy when he returns, because no matter what, nothing bad would ever happen to you...right ?
What to Expect : Simon "Ghost" Riley x reader, female reader,SMUT(18+ Only), fluff, flirting, romance, kissing, touching, teasing, emotional obstacles, and more,
Word Count : 4.5k
Pet-Name : Varies but mostly using Pigeon and Kitten (18+)
════ ⋆Safe With A Ghost MasterList⋆ ════
═══════════ ⋆Chapter 2⋆ ════════════
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Looking down at the chart after filling out some collected data and results about your patient, you glanced up at the clock seeing the time as you noticed it was 06:47. You give a soft yawn after a long night shift finishing up your last chart. As you were just finishing up, in your peripheral line of sight, you see a dark silhouette standing in the corner of the ER hallway leaning against the wall. Glancing up from the chart, you beam with a smile, before striding over to the man whom you've loved and missed....Ghost but as you know him Simon.
You rushed towards him in your lab coat, as he slowly moves away from where he stood embracing you back. Both holding each other, his colossal hands wrapping around your small waist as you press your head into his black hoodie chest. Eventually pulling away looking up at him you compose yourself "I can't believe you're here ?! I thought you weren't returning for another week ? " You say softly with excitement.
Ghost eyes soften at the sight of you finally in his arms, his balaclava moving as he spoke "Got let off earlier." he said gruffly taking you in, as he was quite distracted seeing you in your work outfit. He always found you attractive in your medical uniform with your hair tied up high in a ponytail slightly exposing your neck. Without even registering, Ghost had lifted his mask just enough over his nose to kiss onto your bare neck licking there gently. You squirm under his grasp, giggling softly from the sudden affection, yet playfully batting at him to pull away. "Not here babe...I haven't even clocked out yet" he growls softly near your ear nibbling it before pulling away finally looking down at you. "How much longer ? " he asks eyeing you intently. You rub gently over his biceps feeling them flexed under his hoodie, as he holds you in an embrace looking at his chest taking in the moment that he's in front of you. You bite your lower lip glancing up at him. " Gimme, few minutes. I'll meet you in the parking lot." He nods his head curtly, before leaving he leans down to kiss you affectionately, needing, craving, sucking you in as he's longed for you as you for him. Breathlessly catching your breath, he makes his way out of the ER, somewhat grateful rather to wait outside as he hated being in a hospital from past experiences.
You watch him stalk away, wondering if he's caused any other patients to have a heart attack from his large demeanor and skull mask to top it off. You giggle to yourself how many times patients thought he was death itself ready to take them. Snapping back into focus. You finish up your last chart, putting it into files and writing down the time you're clocking out. You make your way to your locker grabbing your stuff, and quickly getting out of your lab coat putting it into your locker.
Eventually you make your way out of the ER into the parking lot, as you see Ghost leaning against his car...our car. You smirk at him taking in the view, as he eventually notices you staring a glint of fire in his eyes as you make your way over to him. "Like what you see, doll ?" He says smoothly, causing a shiver down your spine as you are now in front of him looping your fingers onto his shirt as you gently glide your hand underneath to touch his abs as you make a quip remark "What's not to like ?"...he lets out a husky chuckle which makes you want to melt missing his voice and laugh " Easy lovie, thought you don't wanna make a scene at your workplace...." His eyes squints and the twitch of the mask makes you aware he's grinning underneath as he continues...."Unless you want me to humiliate you in the parking lot, kitten ?"
If it wasn't already humid outside, your body was truly steaming from his flirtatious words. Between your legs itching for the longing attention from him to ravish you was tempting. However, you felt the tiredness creep in, having to work double the amount of night shift lately. You didn't even respond yet, but Ghost knew immediately you were worn down as his eyes softens, reaching up with his skeleton gloved hand to touch your cheek " Let's get you home lovie, we have time to catch up." He says softly, you felt contented and relieved he understood and knew your needs as you smile up at him leaning up to kiss his masked cheek.
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The drive home was hazy, you make this kind of drive to work every day driving two hours to the ER and home. Ghost drove you home, and the drive home was silent but comfortable. He had his hand placed on your thighs, as you laid your hand over his, you hands comparably tiny to his as you looked out the window of the view, before eventually drifting to sleep.
When you arrived, you didn't even know you had arrived, as you were fast asleep, overcome with exhaustion. You began to wake up however, when you felt Ghost unbuckle your seatbelt and was carrying you bridle style close onto his chest into your apartment. Was a cute two story building with trees on each side, a fenced gate in front (one which he opened while carrying you with such ease) and cute porch.
Slowly coming to, he obviously notices you start to stir in his arms as he looks down at you seeing you want to be put down. He was tempted to hold you up longer despite it, but knew better, setting you down onto your feet carefully. His hands sliding up to your waist as you slowly wrap your arm around his neck with the other near his neck to slowly pull up his mask, which he allowed, as you slid it up just enough to show his lips, with a scar slit slanted over them. You lean forward kissing him more, as he pulls you closer deepening the kiss. When you finally pull back you let out a soft pant. Turning on your heel you unlock your apartment door, entering, with Ghost following close behind, as he closes the door behind you locking it. Making your way upstairs you let out a soft yawn stretching as you glance back at him, he was still following you up the steps his hand on your waist as you both make your way up to your shared bedroom.
It was spacious, the bed was queen size, with two nightstands on each side, lamps on both. You slept on the right and him on the left, you both have your own closest on both sides and a small lounging couch behind the bed. Already beginning to undress not caring Ghost was watching, you slip out of your clothing, taking in the view of your back exposed only with a bra. You let your hair down out of a ponytail as you drape it over your neck, before glancing at him, giving him a cocky smirk. God he missed you. "You keep staring like that you might burn me alive." He chuckles walking over to you after removing his leather jacket exposing his tattoo sleeve arm and strong biceps. Now only in a short sleeve black shirt that was tight on him, nothing fits him honestly, there's literally no fitting size for his body. "Maybe you're making it hotter in here. Should stop teasing me with your body lovie." He says gruffly as you pat his chest looking at him, your sharp eyes, which was what caught his attention of you so long ago that you're still together. Everything about you, you were bold, smart, caring, and classy. You both been in a relationship for 3 years. Sometimes he had to remind himself you were his, but the reminder always hit when he came home and sees you light up whenever you saw him. Of course you knew nothing about his work, he kept that part private, all you knew was sometimes his job called him away longer than you liked. Despite that, you understood. As someone in the medical field you too were often sent to different hospitals that needed your expertise or meetings. He was just glad the mission was finished early to come home to you. Now he just hope no one disrupted it.
You look at him "I can't help but tease you Simon, you're too easy " you give a smirk, he chuckles removing his mask to reveal his handsome face. He had scars adorning his face, but despite them, if anything, made him look more handsome, almost like he was "a tapestry of scars". He had told you long ago the stories behind his face scarring, it was when he was more determined to take your relationship to another level. His brows furrow you didn't even realize he backed you up to your closet door as you let out a gasp looking into his eyes the whole time, his towering figure leaning over you with his arms outstretched over your head against the closet "I'm that easy you say ? Didn't seem to be the case the last time you whimpered for me to go easy on you." The remembrance of the night before his last departure, you two were in a heated passion you were screaming out in the moment of lust that the words slipped out of your mouth. You were blushing intensely, it was obvious. Simon knew his way with words and remembering every word you say, he'd use them against you. You fumbled with your words "Well... I- " before you could finish his hand was on your throat, tongue pushed into your mouth as you let out a moan through the heated intense kissing. Your hands reached up to his neck sliding up his nape, you could feel Simon's other hand that was on the closet slide down pulling you towards him at your waist, as he slid more down to give your ass a squeeze. That got a whimper out of you. Despite your tiredness, you wanted, needed to feel him, all of him. You moved your hands down his pectoral muscles as they seem to tense as you glide your hand down his stomach, as you slid your hand up under his shirt to touch his bare abs. Your hands were cool, so this caused him to tense under your touch with his heated abs warming your fingers to the touch. Simon, lowered himself more as he broke the kiss, to kiss onto your bare exposed neck. You willingly tilting your head to the side for him to have full access as you lift your head slightly back, as his kisses and licks sent a shiver down your core.
Your soft moans lingering in the air, as it made Simon go even crazier, he sucked onto your neck to leave little marking knowing you'll scold him tomorrow when you're not in a heated trance about not making them obvious. But he didn't care, you were HIS and he wanted to make sure everyone saw that. His hands were already making their way down to unclip your bra, the snaps easily coming off with just one hand as it released from behind. Eyes looking down to examine your body, he could see your perfect breasts and nipples hard as his one hand slid the straps off over your shoulders, as you allowed so he can see your full breasts. His dark eyes lingering on them as you pant softly, his eyes than bore into you as he gave a smirk "Now how easy am I going on you kitten ? You're already panting" he chuckles moving his head down to lick between your breast getting a whimper from your lips "Y-Youre not being fair- " he picked you up in that moment getting a yelp from your lips as he throws you onto the bed on your back. You sprawled out onto the bed blushing even more as he hovers over your small body, smirking down at you, his hands pressing down near your head "Oh ? Didn't realize this was a competition? If that's the case..." He leans down closer to your face kissing your shoulders as he starts pulling down your pants exposing your panties. Simon stands up looking at your body in your tinted pink panties, they fitted nicely but barely covering your cunt. It was already wet, he chuckled moving his hands up your thighs making his way to your pantie line, before pulling them down slowly. Tossing your panties aside he looks down at you more hungrily, as a predator ready to eats his meal, and you were his prey and main course. His hands spread your thighs apart resting one of them over his shoulder as he kneeled into the bed moving down to lick your wetness.
You let out a moan as you feel his tongue begin to lap over your clit, it was already throbbing your walls were tightening from the tease. You wanted to squeeze your legs shut but would than feel strong arms keeping them open and his warm breath growl against your cunt "I'm not done with my "fair" share kitten" it made you shiver as he spoke with licking your clit, it made it harder not to want to squeeze your legs together when he pushes the tip of his tongue into you. That really threw you over the edge. Your back arched as Simon's hand slid under you gripping and clawing at your hips as he kept eating you out. His voice rumbled against your cunt "Mmm, sweet little thing, you must've missed me that much eh ?" You squirm as he continue, now more aggressive as he grips at your hips as you whimper and moan out "F-Fuck, yes I missed you Simon" he chuckles lowly sucking your cunt and juices heavily seeing you were close, but instead he pulled away right when you were about to hit it. Your eyes were begging, lips trembling, thighs shaking from the closeness of your climax "S-Simon...let me cum" he shushes you grinning down at you as his dog tags hand down on his neck brushing between your breasts, his hand gripping your thighs as he presses his bulge onto your wet throbbing aching cunt "Negative, not till you beg properly" he had an eyebrow raised at you as it made you ache more feeling him grinding against your cunt, you knew what he meant and your cunt was aching for it "Please fuck me..." You let out a pant, as your eyes looked into his whimpering as he presses himself more into you "Oh yeah ? You that desperate for my cock, kitten ?" You moan out only able to nod your head as this made him press harder onto you gripping your neck "Use your words, kitten, or I'll leave you aching" Eyes locked into his, he was hungry, it was like a game to him making you beg and ache for it "Yes ! I want you to fuck me hard !" You pant out as you rock your hips back on him, he was pleased with this smirking down at you "Much better" he says gruffly, working his pants down as your mind was frantic and busy trying to settle your lust, your felt his throbbing tip hitting your wet entrance. He was fully erected, stroking it up and down against your clit, making you squirm and pant "Put it in Simon" you gave an impatient whimper as he cocked his head slightly raising a brow still teasing your clit "Nah, not until you ask properly" he was torturing you and your body was screaming for him to push inside you as you bit down on your lips saying softly "....please", within a second he was already pushed inside you. Your body immediately coils as his large cock forces your walls to spread around his hard shaft. He grunts feeling your walls tighten around him as he begins to set a pace thrusting in and out of you. With each thrust your walls clench and making the juices coat his cock as he groans out looking down at you "Fuckin' 'ell you gotten tighter" he keeps going making your cunt spread to his size, his hand still around your throat with the other gripping your ass as he pushes himself into you hovering over your body.With each thrust, your body shakes from the impact, letting out a panting moan. Simon keeps working your cunt making it more easy to slide in and out, his cock throbbing inside you feeling your insides swallow him whole. He looks down at you as you're in utter bliss from the pleasure, a long awaiting passion you've yearned for when he returned.
He pushes harder and deeper making every thrust count. You were close, he could feel the way your legs trembled and your eyelids grow heavy. After a few thrusts you both hit your highs, you climaxing first as your body shook from the release with Simon continuing his pace. Until he reached his high burying himself deep into you as you both hold each other. His forehead pressed onto yours as he looks at you “Was I easy enough for you kitten ?” He chuckles as you whack him playfully “Shut up” both laughing until you fell asleep in each others arms. The morning sun peeking through your window as you both slept contently.
Two Weeks Go By...
Probably one of the most relaxing last two weeks Ghost has had in a long while. Hearing nothing from Laswell or Price was almost refreshing. Besides the normal annoyance from Johnny sending him random messages about his day to day.
Soap : Yo LT !!! HOWS IT GOING ?!
Ghost: Was going nice.till you messaged.
Soap: You don't mean that LT ! Bet you lonely and miss cracking your lame war jokes.
Ghost: I'm not lonely.
Soap: oh ? You with company these days ? Who ? Why wasn't I invited ?!
Ghost: You ask too many questions.
Soap: alright. I get it I get it, keep sulking by your lonesome. See you soon LT !
Ghost: Hope not.
Ghost snorts, he somewhat meant it, at the same time he was glad Johnny was doing alright. He glances up from his phone looking up at you as you were wearing his shirt. The way his big shirt nearly passed your thighs as you were cleaning up in the kitchen after having a lovely breakfast together, you took time off from work to fully spend every day with him which he was glad, it was nice just being home in each other's presence, with of course the normal "activities"... A vibration snapped his attention back to his phone seeing an unknown id number calling. He almost gripped the phone tightly as he knew who that could be. He answered. It was Price.
Aye Ghost...I know I promised you a longer vacay but...we need you back at base. Laswell found a lead. Apparently the cartels are up to something big.
Part of him clenched his jaw as he darted his eyes into your direction before standing up from the couch making his way to his office. Closing the door behind him so you didn't hear the conversation.
When do I need to leave...?
This question he dreaded asking as he stood in the center of his office near the door. That's when he could hear Price puff out a smoke and give a heavy sigh, as Ghost could imagine him smoking his cigar as if he were in front of him. Just hearing him give a sigh he could tell he wasn't going to like the answer.
Tonight...I'll send a heli to pick you up at midnight. We'll meet at base to discuss a strategy. This lead....it's big Ghost. Bigger than anything we've gotten in a while. Could finally figure out why the cartels are smuggling shit through the borders of Iran.
Hearing this, made Ghost clinch his fist, as he pressed his head back against the door. He hated having to tell you he's leaving again, as he hoped he'd have more time with you Why can't I fuckin have time...now I have to fuckin tell y/n out of the blue I got called away for a mission, and just up and leave...
'right Price...I'll be there. Ghost out.
The line ends...
He glances at his phone for the longest time. Just when he thought he could live in peace he gets dragged right back into hell again. This was his life, he knew that when he joined 141, there was no going back the minute he took on being Ghost. He thought that was the only life he could live until he met you... As much as he knew how understanding you were, sometimes he felt he didn't deserve you. The thought of you always waiting, never knowing what he does or when he'll return, must weigh down on you every waking day. Prior to you two meeting, even though he never told you exactly what he does, you were very aware and understanding to always having to be called away. For all you knew, you only knew he was in the military. That barely was enough to scratch the surface of what he truly does. He doesn't know how long he was staring for, until he heard a gentle knock against the door he was leaning on....until he heard your soft voice speak...
"Simon ? Everything okay ?" You noticed his body tense from the kitchen as you didn't know the nature of it. Watching as he shut the door to his office room as you frowned slightly. Made you worry when he shut himself into a room, you could only presume it meant something was wrong and he didn't want you to hear or know about it. However, how could you not ? He's all you worry about whether here or not. The only family you have, and someone you love dearly. As you look at the closed door in front of you, you notice the doorknob turn as you stand back slightly to see Simon's eyes, how they almost seemed...hollow. He seemed to no longer try to hide anything from you lately as you have already mentioned how much it upsets you seeing him actually show emotions made you ache. You say in a soft voice "Your base called....?" He just looks down at you eyes squinting a little, as he seems to wince when you mention his job. Nodding your head and biting your lip trying to hold back tears Shit...don't cry in front of him. It'll make him feel worse... "um, when do you leave ?" Seeing him seemed to flinch and clench his phone tighter, you were going to make a joke about him going to squeeze the life out of it but decided against it because your voice ran away when he answered "Have to leave tonight..." Felt like the whole roof came crashing down on you, and like a waterfall your tears came down gushing.
Simon knew this would hurt you and he hated it. Seeing you squirm yet already know the inevitable was just your facade to stay strong. Yet he knew...your eyes always seem to never focus, brows furrow, and lips purse when it runs through your mind and makes you sad. In a second before a tear came down, he had his arms around you gently, enveloping you, holding you. "'S alright pigeon let it out..." He hated this...it made him want to burn everything to the ground. All these missions and leaving you. He wish he could just walk away from it all..Mumbling softly stroking the back of your hair "I'm sorry pigeon...I thought we had more time too, but you know I'll always come back" you sniffle burying your face into his chest taking in his scent "I-I know...but still. I never know when you'll be back. What you do...and God Simon...I don't want to have someone from the military come to our door and tell me you're - " your voice hitches with sobs. As a doctor, you've watched tons of patients weep for their loved ones when you've had to announce a coding. It never was easy. Or telling someone they have something incurable and that they only have so long to live. You could look patients, their families, loved ones, and friends in their eyes and tell them this...yet the thought of being on the other end scared you most.
Simon lifts your chin looking deep into your eyes, his other hand caressing your cheek to wipe your streaming tears. "I know I can't promise you time...but..." He breathed through his nose waiting to have your attention which he does as you sniffle blinking your eyes to stop the tears...heart wrenching to watch "I swear. I'll always come back, bleeding or broken..." He gives you a soft smile, one that he sees is returned with yours. The twitch of your lips wanting to but giving up. "I know no matter what state I return in... I'll always make my way back to you." This gets a more softer smile from your lips, one that makes his heart beat hard and put into memory when things are tough in the field. "Atta girl.." stealing a loving kiss from your lips, you return with same passion and love one he deeply will remember until he returns. For now...he held you close until he couldn't.
Two hours before departure...
With his balaclava back on, leather jacket and cargo pants, duffle bag in hand. Simon...Ghost was pulling on his skeleton gloves about to leave. You came out of the kitchen with a box of his favorite tea bags, handing it to him, as he smiled under the mask. "Thanks, pigeon." Glancing at you, your eyes were red from crying yet you were trying to keep a stoic face, he thought to himself Tougher than my rookies... He leaned down kissing the top of your head as you look up into his eyes giving a smile. "Promise you'll message me when you can ?" You gave a pleading look, those eyes which would make him cave in. "I promise lovie, don't forget to get some food...and..." she sighs out waving her hand dismissively, one no one in his unit would have lived to see another day had they interrupted him. "I know...don't come walking home late alone. "Don't want no bloody douché looking at my girl"" as you give off the best British accent of Simon, giving a smirk. He chuckles "Pigeon, I love you, but that accent is shitty" you smirk "Learn from the worst I guess." He raises a brow at you as he thinks to himself Cocky little thing, should've called her hen instead. Picking up his duffle bag and truck keys, he lifts up his mask to give you one finally kiss, making it deep as possible before tearing away.
"I love you Simon..."
"Ya...I love you too y/n"
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Thanks for Reading !
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Chapter 15
Summary: It's the morning after Y/n's drunken night and they have no idea where they are. Wanda recruits Agatha to help with a legal issue. And Tommy and Billy have a tournament that they are excited about.
A/n: Y'all this is almost 10k so please don't be mad at me for the slow update haha. Also, this kind of got away from me so I hope it's good? I don't know. Also, I can't believe we're at Chapter 15 and it's not even close to being done! Ugh, I have such good chapters planned too! I can't wait to write them. Anyways... Enjoy!
Masterlist | All Stories Taglist | All Chapters
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You wake up, confused by your surroundings. You fear for a moment that you might've slept with someone random at the bar the night before. You don’t remember getting flirty with someone but with the way things have been you wouldn’t be surprised if you acted impulsively the night before. You groan softly as you shut your eyes. The last thing you need right now is another compilation. So you're careful as you step out of the bed, hoping you’re able to make a clean escape.
You're filled with relief as you find yourself fully clothed as you sit on the slightly familiar bed. Is this an ex’s bed? Did you call Daisy? No, you doubt she’d have answered anyway. You are almost certain she has blocked your number by now. Then you think back to who you invited and consider that maybe this is Darcy’s home. Your head is pounding as you wrack your brain to remember where you know these soft sheets from. As you look around the room you notice pills on the nightstand and a glass of water. You take the pills and brace yourself to stand up. As you stand in the middle of the room, it clicks in your mind where you are and you can’t believe it took you so long to figure it out. Wanda. You stretch before you walk out of the room.
As soon as you open the door, you're greeted with an inviting aroma. You follow it as if you were a cartoon character all the way down the stairs. Wanda is in the kitchen cooking French toast. “That smells amazing,” you compliment through a yawn.
“Good morning,” she says as she hands you a cup of steaming coffee. “You gave us all quite the scare last night,” she says as she keeps her focus on the stove. She isn’t ready to look at you after what went down between the two of you last night. With how much restraint you’ve shown her in the past, she is upset that you kissed her last night. She knows that she is guilty of kissing you when she shouldn’t have but she couldn’t let go of the annoyance she feels towards you for drinking so much. You were supposed to be the stable one out of the pair of you.
“I'm sorry,” you say with a frown. “I shouldn't have had so much to drink. I just. Things have been really weird lately. I don't really know what or how to process. I don't know. There's no excuse. I shouldn't have gotten so wasted that I don't remember last night and you shouldn't have had to take care of me.”
Wanda places the toast on a plate as she listens to you express your guilt. “It’s okay. I'm glad Darcy called me. She and two giant guys couldn't keep you under control. It gave me a bit of an ego boost,” she smiles playfully as she takes a sip from her mug. She’s going to give you a pass because you’ve given her many. “Besides, it's not like I haven't done worse with you before. It happens. Just don't make a habit of it.”
You nod as you remember the time Wanda got drunk with you and tried to convince you to have sex with her. At least nothing like that happened last night. You hope. “I promise, I won't,” you state as you watch her continue to cook. You find her attractive when she performs even the simplest of tasks. You wonder how you'll be able to sustain a friendship with her now that you're both single again. You pat your pockets for your phone to direct your attention to downloading a dating app before you let your heart convince you into doing something to jeopardize this friendship.
“Are you going to tell me what it was about or do I need to mind my own business?” Wanda asks as she adds more toast to the plate.
“I um,” you sigh as you close your phone and return it to your pocket. You look at her again and then look down into your mostly full mug. “Jean and Anna want to have a baby. With me. Except not with me. Well, they want me to help make him or her or them, they just don't want me to be the kid's parent.”
Wanda quickly turns off the burner and looks at you with wide eyes. “What?”
You nod, “Yup and they expect me to have sex with Jean. No, wait, how did Anna put it?” You tap your chin as you try to remember. “Ah yes, they want me to fornicate with Jean for reproductive purposes only.” You scoff as you bring the mug up to your lips and take a drink.
“I can't,” Wanda shakes her head. “I don’t even know where to begin to process that,” she says as she resumes cooking the breakfast. You set the mug down and look around to make yourself useful. You start chopping the vegetables she has out so that you can busy your hands and attempt to make omelets. “Are you thinking about saying yes?”
You sigh, “Only because I keep thinking about how much Rachel would love it. I mean.” You stop chopping and turn to lean against the counter and face Wanda. “I never talk about this but I had an older brother. I didn't get to know him because he passed away before my first birthday. But my parents would talk about him. There are pictures of the four of us in an album somewhere. And I've thought about how different my life would have been if I still had him. I wonder if my parents divorce would have been easier if I had someone by my side to go through it with me.” You cross your arms and shake your head.
“Rachel has already gone through her parents divorce alone, Y/n,” Wanda reminds you. “Giving them a baby isn't going to change that. She's ten, she's going to be facing big changes soon and a baby isn't going to be able to help support her. In fact, I think a baby will distract from the vital issues she is bound to face. Especially when she'll need her mom's the most. I think you need to take her out of this equation.”
You nod, “That's… well, you’re not wrong.” You scratch your cheek in thought. Trying to come up with a reason why you think you should say yes. “Jean pointed something else out to me,” you start and Wanda gives you her full attention as she stops cooking entirely. “I can have more kids whenever I want. Jean and Anna are ready to have a baby now and they don't want to have to compromise on a dream of theirs because of their inability to,” you struggle for a moment to come up with a way to end the sentence, “reproduce on their own.”
Wanda licks her lips as she thinks. She didn’t realize that Jean had this much control over you that you would tear yourself apart in order to keep her happy. She thought the two of you had the healthiest relationship she’d ever seen of a divorced couple but now she can see how wrong she was. You cannot say no to Jean and it’s killing you at the thought of having to. It seems as though there isn’t a thing she could ask of you that you will say no to. She was the one that asked for the divorce. She wanted to keep the house you put so much care in. Wanda had only been there once when Rachel invited the boys over to play. Rachel gave her a tour of everything you’d ever fixed. Vision wouldn’t even replace the batteries in the TV remote and he was pissed that he lost the house in the divorce. You cared about that house but you gave it up without a fight.
You once told Wanda about a car you saved up for in high school and paid for on your own but Jean convinced you to sell it, you did so without a thought. Your version of the story was that Jean had just told you that she was pregnant and that she didn’t think it was practical. There was a picture of it with you and Jean on the hood sitting on a shelf at her house. When Wanda asked if that was the same car from the story she was told. Jean laughed and claimed that she had you sell the car months before she found out she was pregnant simply because she didn’t like it. But because you are who you are, your memories were altered to believe the decision was made as a parent. That wasn't Jean's fault, it's just the way you had programmed yourself when you were young and in love.
This, however, wasn't about a car. She'd actually prefer that you sit here and tell her about Jean asking you to buy her a car. But asking you to procreate with her this way is… Wanda can't even fathom how the two normally level headed women came to this conclusion.
“Are you willing to sign away your parental rights? This isn't a closed adoption situation. You would have to see this child at least every Sunday for years,” she stresses the length in time to prove a point. “I think I've gotten to know you well enough that I can say, you aren't the kind of person to just help bring a kid into the world and not be part of their life.” Wanda shakes her head.
You go back to working on the omelets as you go quiet. You didn't know what to do or say. All you know for certain at the moment is that you are hungry and that you want to have an omelet with the French toast that Wanda made. “Do you have any bacon?” You ask as you rummage around her refrigerator. “Yes, you do!” You find it before she answers. Wanda is concerned about your sudden change in attitude as she watches you move around the kitchen. But she doesn’t say anything else. If you want to move on from the subject, she will move on from the subject.
While the two of you are sitting at the kitchen table eating in silence, Wanda is thinking of ways to help you if you do agree to help Jean have another baby. It wasn't fair to ask so much of you. What would you even get out of this? She can’t believe the couple is being so selfish. The entire time you were staying here, you were putting in a lot of overtime and it was painful to watch you come here beaten down and exhausted. And yet you smiled around the kids, you were playful and were very helpful in putting them to bed. Wanda could see it in your eyes that you were stressed but you never let it show. She thought about how dirty you came back every night. Evidence that you have to put in a lot of hard and physically demanding labor in order to provide. Something that many people have the luxury of never having to experience. Wanda thought about how grateful she would be to you if she had to depend on you that way. What she would do to show her appreciation. Meanwhile Jean and Anna are coming up with more ways for you to spend that hard earned money on anyone but you.
As you ate your breakfast, your mind was running around in circles about the whole thing. Even though you had a week so far to think it over, you realize that focusing on work and getting drunk every night didn't make the decision easier and it definitely didn't make any of the issues disappear. You didn't want to do this but you couldn't think of a good reason not to other than you simply didn’t want to. That doesn’t seem like enough. Not when it comes to something like this. Since you couldn't think of a good argument, you felt that your hands were tied and you might as well do it for Jean. Er, for Rachel? No, Wanda is right, Rachel cannot be a factor in this decision. But it feels weird making the decision based on your ex-wife. She isn’t your wife, which means you’re not obligated to her anymore. Only Rachel. The thought is freeing as you begin to analyze your relationship with Jean. This causes you to worry you about transferring most of your paychecks to Jean instead of directly to the hospital because she said that she should be the one to manage the payments. Was she putting the money where it’s meant to go or was she doing something else with it? She wouldn’t do that. Would she? Nothing seems as clear cut as it used to.
“Do you want a baby?” Wanda asks as the two of you take care of the dishes together.
You shake your head, “Not right now. I've had to dip into the secret college fund I have for Rachel to pay rent this month. Not a lot but still. I’m not financially in a place to have another kid. I always thought I’d wait to even have kids when I checked all of the boxes and then well, Rachel happened.”
“You have a college fund for Rachel?” Wanda asks as she dries the plate. You nod as you scrub a glass cup. “Why is it a secret?”
“Because, there is the one Jean and I started when Rachel was born and that one Jean is constantly using as a rainy day fund,” you state politely because she really did use it as a savings to pay for anything she didn’t want to use her money on. As you continue to wash the dishes you're starting to wonder if she even adds money in there at all at this point or if it’s only you. “The one I have kept a secret, I started after the divorce because I can't really trust Jean with money. She actually used the last attempt of the joint college fund on the DJ for her wedding last year. It was Anna’s cousin and he didn't actually need to be paid since he's in high school and the entire setup was his laptop, my bluetooth speakers, and YouTube. He didn't even have a paid plan so there were a lot of ad breaks throughout the event. The worst part of it all is that he has Spotify premium but he didn't want to use it because he didn't want his recommendations to be all, in his words ‘lesd up,’” you shake your head as you recall the sweaty sixteen-year old that vaped away your daughters college money all night.
The more the two of you talk the more Wanda is finding reasons why you shouldn't get involved in this. Jean might say that you would have no involvement with the child but what happens when she's having a rough financial patch and she goes to the courts for child support? Wanda knew she was going to have to call Agatha as soon as she dropped you off. You clearly needed someone to intervene and Wanda has just appointed herself to be the one to do it.
“You don't have to give me a ride home, I can pay for a ride home,” you mutter as you pull your phone out of your pocket. Wanda swipes it out of your hands.
“Are you crazy? I've seen the medical bills you guys have to pay, you need to be saving as much as you can,” Wanda says as she puts the device in her pocket. “You can have it back when you're home.” You roll your eyes but apologize as you express your gratitude. She was being kind. You didn't need to be giving her this much attitude when she was doing nice things for you.
The two of you chat lightly in the car ride to your apartment. You don't want to dive into the issues on your mind and Wanda doesn't want to upset you further. “Oh! Tommy and Billy have a big match coming up for their martial arts classes. They're really excited about it. Billy is more nervous than excited but he's still really into the whole thing. I've asked him if he wants to do something else but he's pretty dedicated to the sport. I'm glad he's staying committed. Besides, it'd be really unfair for Tommy to be better trained in how to beat up the poor kid more than he already does. At least this way, Billy has a chance.”
You smile as you agree. Billy needed the martial arts classes more than Tommy did but at least they could be fighting on an even level. “Hey, what was that brand of vodka you gave me last night?” Wanda makes a face as she doesn't recall giving you any vodka last night. “Come on, I'm not going to go on another binge. It was just really good and really familiar. What was it called?”
Wanda tries to wrack her brain for a memory of what she could have served you the night before. “I didn't, I only gave you - oh,” she smiles at you for a second and quickly returns her attention to the road ahead of her. “It was water. You wouldn't drink it so… I kind of tricked you.”
You shake your head. “I don't know if I could trust you ever again,” you say dramatically as you turn to face the window on your side of the car. “I can't even look at you.”
“What?! I was trying to keep you alive!”
“By lying to me?” You playfully accuse.
“It was for your own good!” She argues. You cross your arms over your chest and pout as you slouch in your seat.
“I'm not a child,” you say in a baby-like voice, making Wanda laugh. Her laugh breaks your act and you sit up laughing with her. It goes quiet for a bit as she gets closer to your apartment building. Then you remember the crazy work schedule you have. “Hey uh, can you help me with picking up Rachel from school this week? I'm not going to work as late as the past few weeks but I don't think I'll get out in time and I want to avoid her moms as much as I can while we figure out this whole thing.”
“You ask a lot of me,” Wanda says as a joke but you don't catch it at first so you start to stumble on an apology. “I’m kidding, of course I'll be happy to help you out with Rachel.” She doesn't mind helping with your daughter because she loves her almost as if she were her own child. Plus her boys behave better when Rachel is around. It doesn't hurt that Wanda will get to see more of you, but that’s not why she agrees.
“Thank you,” you smile at her, grateful for her generosity. You have no idea what you would do without her. You have no idea how you’ve gotten this far in life without her. You want to express more than a simple thank you but you decide against it. Now is not the time.
The next day you go over what you want to say to Jean and Anna on your drive to their house. You practice denying them over and over again. It goes poorly during the fake scenarios. One of the scenarios even ends with you offering to set up a date to start the process. You don't know why it's so hard for you to say no to Jean. You've done it plenty of times. You think. You can't come up with an example of when you've been able to say no and put your foot down when it concerns your ex-wife. But that doesn't mean that it hasn't happened.
As you walk to the door you whisper the words over and over again to yourself but once Jean opens the door the word gets lost in the back of your throat. “Have you thought about it some more?” Jean asks innocently. She's giving you a look that has made you crumble and cave into anything she has asked of you over the years.
“Um,” you start as you hold eye contact with her. Rachel has so much of her, you wonder if a new baby would look more like you or… No! You have to remind yourself that you're not doing it. You're not going to agree to this. “I have given it some consideration and I-”
Rachel hobbles by with Anna behind carrying her school bag. She should have been able to get one of those scooters. You shake your head slowly as you take the bag from Anna. Hoping that it’s enough of an answer since Rachel is present. You watch Jean’s expression drop. “Baba! Look at all of the signatures I got at school!” Rachel says excitedly as she shows off her cast.
“Wow, look at you miss popularity,” you smile at her and she blushes as she calls you a dork. “Let's get going, sweetheart.” You walk with her to the car and Jean follows, she helps you get Rachel into the truck and once the door is shut, she asks you to reconsider. “Jean, do you know what you're asking of me? Do you really have no idea what this would do to me?”
“This isn't about you and it isn't about me! It's something bigger than both of us!” She argues a little too loud for your liking.
You hold your hands up as you start to walk to the driver's side of the vehicle. “I'm not going to talk to you when you're like this. I don't even recognize you right now,” you shake your head. Jean grabs your shoulder and forces you to look at her.
“You can't say no,” she pleads, “I need you. Please. Please reconsider.” You look into her eyes and feel your throat close up. You were in love with her once upon a time. You would do anything for her. You have done everything for her. But this was too much. It’s gone too far.
“I can't, I'm sorry. You have to find someone else,” you tell her softly. Jean lets go of your shoulder and storms off to the house. She slams the door and you enter the truck with a confused and concerned daughter. “It's nothing to worry about, sweetheart. Mom is just,” you shake your head, not really having the words. “Anyway, I'm going to work late this week so I asked Wanda to pick you up with the boys if that's okay with you.” You inform her to get her mind onto something more positive.
Rachel lights up. Completely forgetting about her mom’s odd behaviour. “Are we staying with her again?”
You shake your head as you start the engine. “No, no, that was a one time thing honey. She's just going to take you to her house and I'll pick you up from there. Okay?”
Rachel frowns for a second but quickly perks up. “Okay, that will be cool.” She puts on some music and it cheers you up to hear her happy little voice singing again.
“Wanda! Darling, how are you?” Agatha greets Wanda with a hug. “What is this big emergency?” Wanda had asked Agatha to brunch a few hours before she had to pick up the boys from their dad's.
Her friend is a family attorney and she has seen many unique cases over the years. If there was anyone that might be able to help you, Wanda believes it will be Agatha. “It's about a friend of mine. They have been put in an interesting position and I was wondering if you could help me understand their rights.”
Agatha looks at Wanda as she ponders her words. A waiter walks by and she stops him. “Hey there cutie, do you mind getting my friend and I here a couple of mimosas. Thank you, you are such a gem!” The young man blushes as he walks off to get the drinks. “What's the position your friend has been put in exactly?” Agatha asks Wanda, assuming that it has something to do with Wanda and she’s a bit embarrassed.
“They've been asked to help bring a child into the world and then sign away any parental rights should they succeed in conceiving. Giving the mother sole custody and the other parent a front row seat to their childs-”
“I'm going to stop you right there. I actually know what you're talking about,” Agatha cuts her friend off.
“You do?” Wanda is shocked, she begins to wonder if your friends told her or worse, if Jean and Anna hired her.
“Yes, I just didn't think it was going to be a real issue. I mean, the idea came from a shrooms trip, I wasn't exactly inclined to believe them. Oh! Thank you,” Agatha takes the mimosa from the waiter. “You are really earning your tip, sweetheart. While I have you, I'll take two omelet breakfast burritos with a side of french toast and a side cup of fruit. Wanda? What are you having?”
Wanda is thrown off by the new information she had just received that she doesn't remember a single menu item that she had been mulling over while waiting for Agatha. “I-I suppose I'll have the same. Thank you,” she hands the waiter the menu and takes a sip from her mimosa. “So wait, they told you about this?” Wanda asks as she tries to make sense of anything.
“You're talking about Jean and Anna right?” Wanda nods. “Then yeah, at your new years eve party, we were sharing stories about experimenting with a substance or two and they said that they had taken shrooms on their day off to help them heal or whatever and they both saw a baby that was supposed to be theirs and they were thinking of asking Y/n to help them,” Agatha explains and suddenly everything seems clearer to Wanda. Why else would they think this was a sane idea?
“Wow,” Wanda shakes her head just as she gets into the details of what Jean and Anna actually asked of you. The food comes out before Wanda is finished explaining, interrupting her for a moment. Agatha shakes her head as she cuts into her burrito shaped eggs when her friend continues the absurd story.
“The nerve,” she says as she stabs her fork into her food. “The amount of cases I see where people are begging for the other biological parent to give a single fuck about their children is ridiculous as it is. But never do I experience someone expecting a caring person to give that up.” Wanda agrees. She has to work so hard to keep Vision in her kids' lives. Part of her has thought about what it would be like to just stop calling him, stop dropping the boys off, but she knows that doesn't benefit the boys. Besides, he would most likely use that as a reason to take her to court or use it as a way to tarnish her reputation with mutual friends and colleagues. He's very good when it comes to working a room against those he loathes the most.
“I don't want to believe that Y/n would agree to something like this but, I am still getting to know them. It seems like Jean is a person in their life that they can't say no to,” Wanda starts. “What legal steps do you think Y/n should take in order to protect themselves and their rights in this matter.”
Agatha tips her head side to side as she thinks. “You're lucky I lost that bet, because if Jean and or Anna had to pay me on new years eve then I wouldn't be able to help. It would have made it a little more difficult, I should say.” She pulls one of her business cards out of its holder and hands it to Wanda. “Give this to Y/n as soon as possible and have them book an appointment immediately. I'll have to take a lot less than my normal fee but I'm willing to take the case and be their lawyer. Besides, it's a requirement that I take a few pro bono cases a year. This will help me meet my quota. Y/n just has to be vigilant and meet with me first.”
Wanda nods as she listens to every direction carefully. Agatha then changes the subject to her dating life and how she's thinking about taking a break from the dating scene. Mostly because one of her hookups turned out to be the gym teacher at the kids school. She didn't know until after an awkward encounter when Nicholas had been dropped off early without her knowledge and he recognized his gym teacher. “Poor boy is traumatized, we're both starting individual therapy this week,” Agatha concludes as she takes a sip of the tea the waiter brought out for her.
“You're seeing a therapist?” Wanda’s mouth hangs open.
“Close your mouth, you'll catch flies,” Agatha taps the tips of her fingers against the bottom of Wanda's chin. Wanda shuts her mouth.
“I'm sorry, I just, I never saw you as the therapy type is all. But, no, I'm sorry that came out all… that's great!” Wanda stumbles on her words, amusing Agatha.
“Oh please, I've been very vocal over the years about how you and Carol are the only therapy I need. But, well, now Nicholas is scarred for life and it was my actions that caused that, so I have to face the consequences,” Agatha elaborates. “We'll see how it goes, of course.”
On Monday, Bucky and Thor check in at the start of their shifts when they arrive at the job site. They each take turns in expressing their concerns and you assure them that you are fine. You thank them and they eventually move on to do their part of the job but you can tell that they don't fully believe you. It’s not something you can dwell on when you’re working. It’s dangerous to think about anything other than work when you’re here. A distraction and a simple mistake could cost someone’s life in this industry.
After a long shift, you drive to Wanda’s house to pick up Rachel. You’re exhausted but you mentally prepare yourself to be in Rachel’s presence. You know that she will have so much to talk about and you want to give her your undivided attention. Plus, you’re going to have to have the energy to make her dinner. When you pull up to Wanda’s driveway, you call your friend to have her send your daughter out but she invites you inside. You didn't want her to invite you to stay for dinner because she was already doing so much for you, but Wanda is pretty convincing. After some resistance, you end up in her bathroom to clean up for dinner. Washing your face and your hands to remove the dirt and grime.
Dinner starts with Tommy and Billy going on and on about the tournament that they're training for. Just as Wanda warned that they would. You hang onto their every word as they describe what they practice at the dojo. Eventually they get too excited and start talking over each other, resulting in them to start bickering with each other.
“Hold on, boys. Please, you can go one at a time. I don't mind hearing both of your perspectives,” you say calmly to get them to focus on the subject rather than the argument of who should tell the story. The boys are so used to competing for Vision’s attention that neither considered that you’d like to hear from the both of them. Wanda watches as you get them to settle down without raising your voice or threatening them with some sort of punishment. She can't see why Jean would want to cut you out of this part of having a child. But she definitely understands why she's asking to have another child with you. Your patience is giving Wanda baby fever.
Then you make sure that Rachel gets to talk about her day once her boys have gone on too long. You listen with the same enthusiasm that you showed her boys as Rachel goes on about how she was a warrior princess during recess even though Wanda doubts you have any interest in either of the topics. When Rachel is done speaking, you turn to Wanda. “And how was your day? I know it's tough to follow ninja training,” you gesture to the twins, “and my little warrior princess. But I’d still love to hear about it.” Your tone is soft as you speak to her. Wanda finishes her meal to occupy her mouth as she thinks of a proper response and to stop herself from blushing because of your attentiveness.
“It was good. I got a lot of work done and then I picked up the kids,” she smiles at the three of them and messes with Billy's hair since he's the closest to her. You smile as you watch her. “We did homework and then we made dinner together. Rachel was a really big help. We were very happy to have her. Weren't we?” Wanda directs the question to her boys who nod with wide smiles.
“I don't like salads but I think Rachel made the best one I've ever had,” Tommy compliments as he helps himself to another serving of the salad.
“Thank you,” Rachel responds shyly. “I really like the bread you made. It was my favorite part.” The meal was spaghetti with salad and cheesy garlic bread. She grabs another slice of bread to add to her plate. You watch the kids interact with a slight fear that they might develop feelings for each other in the future. For the moment, you push the thoughts away from your mind. Rachel is smarter than you and her mother, she won’t make the same mistakes. You hope.
When the kids eventually run from the table because you warn that Rachel has ten minutes left here, that's when Wanda finally brings up the conversation she had with Agatha the day before. “I just want you to be protected if you decide to go through with it,” Wanda says as she finishes explaining.
You stare at the card for a moment and sigh. “Thank you for this but I already told her I'm not doing it.”
Wanda is surprised to hear that you said no. When she last saw you on Saturday, you were beating yourself up about saying yes. She wonders what changed but she doesn't question it. “Still, call Agatha and set up a meeting. Just in case. You don't want to be caught in something that you can't get out of and Agatha is a really great lawyer.”
On Wednesday, you are spending your lunch break sitting in Agatha’s office. You tell her that you already declined Jean’s proposition but express your concern that Jean might try something in retaliation. “Interesting,” Agatha starts as she leans closer. “How so?”
You look out the large windows in her corner office and sigh. You clench your jaw as you think about the times that Jean has been denied in the past and it wasn’t ever good. “She just, she doesn’t like to be told no. I don’t know what she’ll do but she’s capable of anything. Honestly, I’m kind of scared to drop Rachel off on Sunday because she might not let me see her again until I change my answer.”
Agtha sits up with a concerned frown. “She shouldn’t be able to do that. Unless,” she squints her eyes as she looks you up and down. “Do you have partial custody of Rachel?”
“Yes, but it’s a little more complicated than that.” You bite the inside of your cheek as you look at Agatha like a child telling his mother that he did something bad. “At the time of our divorce I was between jobs and didn’t really have my own place to live. The judge saw me as an unfit parent that should only be allowed supervised visitations on the weekends.” You explain slowly as you go over the details from your memory. “Jean thought that was a crazy ruling but didn’t say anything in court. I think because she was broke and single at the time and wanted to be the one who received child support.” You shake your head as you remember the darkest period of your life. “We eventually worked out our own arrangement but we never updated it with the court. And honestly I forgot all about it until this stuff came up. But, gosh, I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid.” You run your fingers through your hair and lift your tongue to the roof of your mouth to prevent yourself from crying. “On paper, Jean has more parental rights to Rachel than I do.”
Agatha nods as she takes notes. “Actually, you might have more than you think,” she says. “I have looked up Jean’s address and it’s not within Rachel’s current school district. Correct?” You confirm. “But your address is, is that correct?” You confirm again and sit up straighter as you clear your throat. “Well, then that means you have documentation stating that Rachel’s permanent address is the same as your permanent address. Which could be used as evidence that you are her primary caregiver and not your ex-wife.”
“But I’m not her primary, I mean, we both take care of her eqaually,” you respond nervously. Not wanting to start a nasty custody battle with Jean right now.
“Listen, I know this is overwhelming. I’m not going to send a formal letter to Jean or petition the court without your say so. I’m just thinking about worst case scenario. I genuinely hope that when you drop off Rachel on Sunday that you will be able to pick her up on the following Sunday. But in the event that Jean decides to enforce her rights as the primary caregiver, then we have to be ready to present your case to a judge. Besides, for Rachel’s sake, you should have that updated soon. You’re a good parent and anyone can see how much she adores you. Do you want to have that taken from you in the blink of an eye?” Agatha poses a compelling argument and you really start to consider your options here.
“Can I get back to you on that? I really have to get back to work,” you say instead of giving her the go ahead. You really needed to think about this some more. You worried that if you took Jean to court right now to get it formally stated that you should have equal custody of Rachel, and maybe even got your child support payments lowered, she would do everything in her power to stop you. She was so upset the last time you saw her. You’re surprised she didn’t rip Rachel out of the truck right then and there. Agatha is right, though, Jean can decide to take Rachel from you at any moment and you can’t do much to stop her.
You consider your options the rest of the day. When you are inevitably left alone with Wanda, you talk about how the meeting went with Agatha. You tell her the information on the patio as the two of you sit and have a glass of wine together. Wanda is speechless at the end of it and she brings two fingers to her lips and blows air out when she removes them. “Are you fake smoking?” You ask as you recognize the gesture.
“Yes, this is stressful but I'm a mom this week so I can't light a real one,” she says as she continues to pretend to smoke. I can't help but laugh at how serious she is as she speaks. I hold my hand out.
“Do you mind if I get a hit of that?” I ask and Wanda agrees. She hands you air and you pretend to take a couple of puffs before you hand it back to her. “Whoo, you didn't tell me that was weed!” You say playfully, making Wanda smile. She shrugs in response.
“I told you I was smoking, I didn't say what I was smoking,” she goes back to pretending to smoke.
You look up at the night sky and sigh as you think about everything going on in your life right now. “How did everything get so messed up?” The question is rhetorical and not at all directed to Wanda and she knows that. She lets the question go unanswered for a few minutes as silence lingers between the two of you.
“I don’t know,” Wanda looks at you with a slight frown and sad eyes. She reaches out and holds your hand. You accept the small gesture of comfort. “What do you think you're going to do?” You shake your head, not really knowing what you should do. “Do you think you can have a rational conversation with her?” You shrug, before Jean made the request you would have said yes without any doubt. Now, you're not as confident in any answer.
“I should at least try though, right?” You ask rhetorically. Wanda shrugs, mentioning that it might not hurt. You smile. “Would you mind if I dropped Rachel off here on Saturday? So that I can have a conversation with Jean and Anna without risking Rachel's ignorance to the situation.”
Wanda nods, “Of course! I'm sure the boys will love it. Besides, I'm probably going to be in your debt for a while since you've volunteered yourself to be the boys punching bag until their tournament is over.”
You laugh, “You're never in my debt, Wanda. I'm happy to help the boys with any extra training. And if anyone is in debt here it's me with you. You've done so much for a stranger that you met last summer in a liquor store.” You smile fondly at the memory of seeing a woman who looked like she needed some kindness in that moment. “I don't know how to thank you enough.”
Wanda thinks about how the two of you haven't known each other for a year and yet it feels as though you've always been in her life. She smiles, “When you put it like that, I don't know how we ever got here in the first place. I should have had you arrested.”
“What?” You are amused by the statement. “Why would you have me arrested?”
“I was a mess that day! Then you're hitting on me? I don't know, it's kind of a red flag that you were interested in me when I was broken.”
“Hitting on you?” You make a face. “No offense, but I was far from hitting on you that day. You looked lonely but not in the ‘I’m open for a hookup’ kind of lonely. Like the ‘I might throw myself off a bridge if someone doesn't smile at me’ kind of lonely.”
Wanda’s jaw drops. “You're telling me that you only approached me because I looked suicidal?”
You shrug with a nod, “Kind of.” Wanda’s grip on your hand loosens as she shakes her head but she finds the whole scenario to be a bit funny. “But hey, if we hadn't met that night, we would have met a number or times. That just happened to be our origin story.”
Wanda closes her fingers around your hand again as she thinks about it. She was going to meet you for the first time when you came over to work on her wall. And if she hadn't met you either of those times, then it might've been because of Rachel and her boys being friends. If not then, it could've been a PTA meeting or at a school sanctioned event. She hadn't realized how connected her life is to yours until now. It feels like destiny. It feels like she was enchanted to meet you.
On Saturday, after you dropped Rachel off with Wanda, you are standing at the front door of Jean and Anna’s house. You are working up the nerve to knock on the door. You pace back and forth making the situation bigger and bigger in your mind.
“Y/n?” Jean’s voice startles you and you jump as you turn around. Jean and Anna both have grocery bags in their hands. You didn’t even think that they weren’t home this entire time.
“Hey, hi, um,” you stumble on your greeting. “Here, let me get that for you.” You take the bags from Jean’s hands and she looks at you weird but she doesn’t stop you. She unlocks the front door and you follow the two women inside.
“What brings you here?” Anna asks as she starts to pull items out of the bag,
“Where’s Rachel? Is everything okay?” Jean asks with a concerned frown.
You are confused by their calm demeanors. You expected the two to be upset with you. You expected Jean to be hostile towards you. “She’s fine, she with her friends. I wanted to talk to you guys about the whole baby thing. Without Rachel being nearby,” you state as you nervously rub your hands together.
“Oh,” Jean says as she stops unpacking the reusable grocery bag. “I’m sorry about my reaction on Sunday. I’ve been so emotional lately, I don’t know why. I shouldn’t have reacted that way. Especially not with Rachel so close by.”
“So you’re not mad that I won’t do it?” You ask with caution, not sure if you’re safe or not right now.
Jean takes a deep breath and Anna comes up behind her to hold her. “I’m not mad at you. It was an unfair thing to ask of you. I truly apologize. I don’t know, I just thought that Rachel is such a wonderful kid and she was such a good baby that I didn’t want to risk creating some sort of little monster with someone else.”
You smile as you think about what Rachel was like as a baby and she wasn’t easy at all. “I hate to break it to you but Rachel was a nightmare when she was a baby. She didn’t become enjoyable until she was a toddler.” Jean makes a face as she claims that’s not how she remembers it. “That’s because I let you sleep through it. But that kid had a set of lungs on her and she made sure to use them at two in the morning every night for months. Then she spit up everything we fed her, then she had the phase when she would grab her poop and fling it. I can go on and on.” Jean’s expression changes as she makes a connection from your words to a suppressed memory.
“I guess you’re right,” Jean mumbles. “I guess I just had my rose colored lenses on it all. I’m sorry.” You shrug and let her know that it’s okay. “Is that all that you wanted to talk about?”
You bite your cheek as you wonder if you should even bring up the custody issue but decide that now is as good of a time as any. “I will admit, your reaction on Sunday did scare me. It reminded me that I don’t have as much custody over Rachel as I should and -”
“Wait, no, you do,” Jean stops you and you make a shocked expression. “Don’t you remember? There was all of this paper work that we all had to fill out when Anna was adopting Rachel. So that we have equal custody?” You crease your eyebrows as you think back to several months ago and you vaguely remember signing a bunch of legal documents. Jean walks out of Anna’s arms and over to her study. She reappears with a folder and shuffles through the documents inside. “Here it is,” she hands it to you. “Right there it states that we have an even split joint custody with no imbalance. Not like that bullshit first ruling. I think that judge was just mad that you identify as nonbinary.” You take the document and look it over and that’s when memory comes back to you. How could you forget a momentous occasion like that?
“Oh, wow, I’m sorry. I don’t know how I forgot,” you look up from the document. “I’m sorry that my mind went to the idea that you would keep Rachel from me.” You hand the document back to Jean and she puts it back into it’s folder. She hugs you and you relax in her arms.
“It’s not your fault, I have done some questionable things in the past. I mean hell, I asked you to be a sperm donor in the most bizzare way possible. I wouldn’t have trusted me if I were you.” This causes your body to shake with laughter. “Are we okay?” Jean asks as she steps back. You nod with a relieved grin. “Good, because we are going to be in each other’s lives forever and I don’t want us to hate each other. Forever is a long time.”
“I agree,” you say softly. “I’m glad that we could resolve this too. It’s been weighing heavy on me the past couple of weeks.” You stay with Jean and Anna for an hour to catch up with them and make sure that everything between the three of you is actually resolved. Then you drive to Wanda’s house. She and the kids are playing an intense game of Mario Kart, a game you’ve been banned from because you win every time, and you don’t want to interrupt. You sit next to Wanda and laugh when you notice that she is in last place. When Tommy wins he jumps out proudly.
“Take that! I win! I’m a winner! You’re all losers! Haha you guys suck!” He does a little dance that makes you dislike him for the moment. You know that he’s a good kid but he wasn’t a good sport when it came to competition. It was something that Wanda says that Vision encouraged. That Vision only produces winners.
Rachel doesn’t like the excessive showboating and she stands up with a red face. “We don’t suck! You’re just a cheater!”
“Am not!” Tommy scowls at the accusation.
“Are too!” Rachel fires back.
You grab her around her waist and pull her to sit on your lap. “Cool off, tiger,” you say as you hold your daughter. “It’s just a game, okay?”
“But Baba, he always wins and it’s not fair!” She pouts as she crosses her arms over her chest and glares at Tommy. You look at Wanda for help but she is preoccupied with comforting Billy, he was fighting tears. So instead you start to tickle Rachel to distract her from the loss. She squeals as she tries to get out of your grasp. You let go of her and stand up after she does.
“Bad sportsmanship has awoken the Tickle Monster!” You roar as you hold your arms up in the air and wiggle your fingers. Tommy and Billy’s eyes widen along with Rachel’s as they watch you act foolish. You stomp up to Tommy and start to tickle him until he escapes your grasp.
“Run! It’s the Tickle Monster!” He shouts as he runs away. You grab Rachel again as she runs past you ans she screeches out as you tickle her. “No! Rachel!” Tommy says as he turns around.
“Go!” Rachel gets out between laughs. “Save yourselves!” You don’t stop tickling her until Billy and Tommy both charge for your legs. They knock you down and you releas your daughter. Tommy and Billy start tickling you back and you laugh until you can’t breathe.
“Okay, that’s enough boys,” Wanda intervenes. You open your eyes and see that she is recording you.
Tommy and Billy don’t stop so you have to beg them, “Boys! Boys! The Tickle Monster is dead! It’s me! It’s Y/n!” They finally stop tickling you and move away. Rachel then challenges the boys to a physical race in the backyard. You lay on the floor catching your breath as the three kids run to the backyard.
“Thank you for that,” Wanda says as she sits on the couch.
“To be honest, I wasn’t sure if Rachel was going to kill Tommy or if Tommy was going to kill her,” you say as you sit up and lean on your elbows. “Figure I turn myself into the enemy before we had a massacre on our hands.” Wanda laughs as she nods her head. She look out the backdoor and watches the three kids set up their little race.
“So, how’d it go?” She asks as she turns back to you.
“Everything has been resolved,” you state as you stand up. “It was a nice conversation, actually.”
Wanda puts her hand on her chest, “That’s amazing news. I’m so glad to hear that.” Then she makes a face as a thought crosses her mind. “Wait, when you say that it got resolved you don’t mean-”
“No,” you shake your head, “I didn’t agree to the whole baby thing.” Wanda relaxes again and then stretches over the couch to get a better view of the kids. She doesn’t want any of them to get hurt and she is especially worried about Rachel and her bad leg. “I’m surprised she thinks she has a chance to win in that cast,” you say as you watch the kids aswell.
“Well that’s what happens when you teach kids to believe that they can do whatever they want,” Wanda shrugs. She smiles when the boys don’t run as fast as they can and let Rachel win. She knows that they can be a little competitive at times, well Tommy more than Billy, but she still has hope that they’ll grow into kind men one day.
After their race is over, Tommy tackles Billy, making you and Wanda run outside to break it up. Tommy gets punished because Billy got a bloody nose from the attack. While you help Billy practice for the tournament, Tommy has to do chores. He washes dishes and has to clean his room. He’s upset that he has to clean but he did feel bad for causing his brother to bleed. So he does as he is told.
Billy’s nose doesn’t bleed for long. You examine it carefully and tap the nostrils and ask him if any of it hurts. When you can confirm that he is fine you start to ask him a ridiculous amount of times if something hurt until he started to laugh. You tell him to get his uniform on so that Wanda can get the blood stains out of his shirt and so that the two of you can practice.
You didn’t take martial arts when you were younger but you wanted to be helpful to Wanda’s kids because she is always so helpful with your daughter. Since the day you offered to help them, you went to bed watching training videos. You were a little nervous about practicing with them but you knew how to be careful enough to not hurt them. Plus, you figured that anything you did wrong, Tommy and Billy would correct you.
When Billy is ready, you and him stand in the middle of the backyard on the grass. Wanda is sitting on her patio with Rachel. Both of them have a glass of ice tea in front of them with a pitcher sitting in the middle of the table. They both cheer you and Billy on. The both of you bow before getting in the fighting position. You are impressed with how coordinated Billy is and you can tell that he wants to be a winner. Tommy is finished with his chores before you and Billy are done with the match and as you predicted, when you did something wrong, the boys called you out on it. Tommy ran over to show you how to properly stand and make the move. You did as he told you and then rewarded him by telling him to get dressed because he was next.
Wanda was planning on making dinner but because she enjoyed watching you train with her boys, she ordered takeaway instead. She figured that it would be a nice treat for everyone anyway. She watches your every move, you’re not as coordinated as her boys but she is impressed by what you’ve been able to learn in the past few days. She knows that you weren’t an expert in the sport but she was touched by your dedication to help her kids.
“Alright, time to eat!” Wanda calls out when the door bell goes off, signalling the delivery of the food. “You boys were so good,” she praises as she kisses her sons on the tops of their heads. “Go wash up so we can eat.” Rachel runs off with the boys to go wash her hands as well, leaving you and Wanda alone for the moment. You and Wanda set the table together and lay out the different types of pizza on the counter. When everything is set, Wanda surprises you with a hug. You accept it with a small laugh as you ask her what the hug is for. “You don’t know what it means to me that you’re being so helpful with them,” she admits against your chest. You don’t know what to say so you just hold her for the moment.
“Wanda, I need to wash my hands too,” you say when you’ve let go of the hug but she hasn’t.
“Fine,” she says as she steps away. You wash your hands in the kitchen sink. The kids run through and Wanda goes over the kinds of pizza’s she ordered and the kinds of drinks she has available. The each fill their plates and you help them with filling their cups.
“Are you going to be at our tournament?” Billy asks as he adjusts his glasses on his face, they had slipped down the bridge of his nose.
“Um,” you look at Wanda, unsure about how to answer. You figured that this might be something that Vision might go to and since Rachel isn’t in the class or even remotely interested in the activity, you couldn’t use her as an excuse. Wanda shrugs at first because she isn’t even sure if Vision will attend. He hasn’t been interested in Tommy and Billy since his daughter was born. It hurts Wanda on many levels but she knows the boys have support other than Vision. They have Pietro and Tony and their grandparents. But what helps her the most in this rough moment in her life is that her boys seek your support and validation and you give it unconditionally. She doesn’t want you to worry about not being able to attend so she decides to nod. “Yeah, of course I’ll be there. I have to support my two favorite fighters.”
“Yes!” Both boys cheer with grins. You find it adorable that they want you there, even though you are nervous about Vision causing a scene. You just hope that nothing goes wrong.
Chapter 16
Taglist: @princessprudy @sayah13 @agaymilflover @awkwardmandalorian @bentleywolf29 @thatshyboy1998 @artisannat @thisischaismagic @wqndanat @madamevirgo @likefirenrain @tearsofglitter @feltlikethat @the-writer-arcane @natashasilverfox @karsonromanoff @aloneodi @lovelyy-moonlight @red1culous @jovialsublimecomputer @natasha-maximoff @iliketozoneout @doudouneverte @druggedduck @notbornbutforged @when-wolves-howl @lifespectator @justyourwritter69 @wandaromamoff69 @awesomelygayasf @nekoannie-chan @diaryoflife @wuwu96 @wandanats-goodgirl @sincerely-indi @blueredg52 @sisiofthemultifandom @fuzzyuniversityeclipsefriend @arcturusseer @scarlettwidow34 @chasethemoon @raven-ss @canyonyodeler @sokovianbaby @alexawynters @bittysworld @hopeless-romantic17177 @spongebobtentacles
#wanda maximoff#wanda maximoff au#wanda#wanda marvel#wanda maximoff imagine#wanda fanfic#wanda x reader#wanda x y/n#wanda x you#wanda maximoff fanfiction#wanda maxmoff x y/n#wonderstruck series#wonderstruck#messedupfan
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I've come to realize something important in writing. (specifically in my personal experience)
(TLDR; I have ADHD and writing is hard even though I'm still doing it every single day. Make it make sense.)
If you have a story in your head that means a lot to you, and you need to take more time to develop and fully flesh it out before posting it, that's totally okay! In fact, in my experience, it has the potential to make the story better over time, really forming it into what you imagine it to be.
Here's an example because I just typed a lot of words and right now I can't seem to process whether they make sense or not.
I have a fanfic that I've been working on for a year now. (For the Marauders fandom if y'all are curious)
It's one that I haven't talked about much because every time I do, I end up losing the motivation to write. This is what happened to another one of my fics for the Haikyuu fandom. (well that and the Marauders.. yeah they fucked me up in the best way and Freckles and Constellations has really suffered because of it smh)
So the reason why this fic is taking so long is because it is such a specific AU that I'm out here trying to meld magic systems, and I've got like EIGHT MAIN CHARACTERS to write backstories for to fit this AU while also being true to them and even though I know the basic plot, there are just so many little details and aspects that will make this fic what I desperately need it to be.
And no one knows just how intricate it is or how important it is to me. Which is totally fine. I don't even know if people are going to read it when I finally manage to post it. This fic is purely self-indulgent.
let me just break down for you what I have prepared for this already:
countless drabbles and scenes and plans written on the backs of receipts and on bits of scrap paper
a 3" 3-ring binder that I've been trying to organize it all in
a google doc titled "TAoRfOL Doc Masterlist" that has links to every single doc I have for this one fic. (it's dated back to March of last year and as of this month has 93 total links. Only 5 of those are reference links.)
notes and ideas i have written in my phone to transfer into docs so I can add them to the masterlist
Hero Forge digital models of those 8 main characters because I wanted to see what their group would look like outside of my imagination
Multiple Spotify playlists dedicated to this fic and the characters which I listen to every single day. (currently @ 494 songs)
And you know what? I just recently, at 6 am this morning, finally figured out the solution to a fucking plot hole I could not work around.
Basically what I'm saying is that I needed all of this time. Every single day I see things and get inspiration. Every day I learn new things and fix errors in my own plans.
As much as I crave the validation and recognition for all of my hard work on this project, I know that If I had just bit the bullet and posted the first chapter without having done all of this research and all of this planning, then it would not have lived up to the story I have in my head.
I admire people who can just write without all of the added steps and in some cases, I can do that. I haven't been able to in a while (which is why that Valentine's Day microfic was actually really big for me to have posted) but that's just how my brain works.
I needed all of my experiences and all of my daily thoughts and all of my collective playlists for this fic to be able to write the story I intended and that is exactly what I'm going to do.
(though if I'm being honest, this timeline is rough. I really want to just write and post this first chapter so so so bad. ToT)
#writing with adhd#fanfic author#writer#TAoRfOL#marauders fanfiction#jegulus#wolfstar#rosekiller#marylily#dorlene#the marauders#regulus black#james potter#sirius black#remus lupin#peter pettigrew#lily evans#dorcas meadowes#barty crouch jr#do Peter and Benjy have a ship name???#platonic moonwater
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Heres a ransdom thought experiment
Yoy are now rumiko takashi writing UY , what is a story beat youd chamge or just a story youd like to read as you have control of the characters
Hai there, hope you're doing great!!
Yay, I love questions like these!! Thank you for the ask anon and here we go ;)
Ryunosuke. Just mostly Ryunosuke, haha. I've never actually found her dad's joke of preventing Ryu from getting what she wants funny and it was more irksome than anything, and it sucked cuz Ryunosuke's great! But what's worse is that she never gets a proper resolution about her feminine wants (even though that was the main point of her character in the first place) and it was just dropped and ignored in the end, so it never felt like her character got a true resolution. I feel like a good way to write Ryu would be to keep the relationship with her dad the same for the most of her story. And then in her last few chapters have them talk out and be in proper understanding for once. Shigeru Chiba, Mr. Fujinami's remake voice actor (and Megane in the old anime), states his view on his character in his character comments:
(Also Shout-out to Shigeru Chiba, he's awesome. He's just so great lol, literally the guy ever.)
And the idea of Ryu's dad raising Ryunosuke to be male because he doesn't want her to leave him is a great idea!! I'd make it like that's the true reason why he does it and somehow they're pushed into a corner where he's forced to admit it to Ryu. He has shown to genuinely care at least a little about her (I'm pretty sure he protected her from the boys of class 2-4 that time she lost her chest wrap) despite how he usually acts. So have them reconcile, have Ryunosuke say she'll stay with her dad if he accepts her for who she is and have him accept her feminity as a result and allow her to act and dress the way she wants. Boom! Problem solved, both sides win and Ryu's dad is made more likeable while Ryunosuke's story has a proper conclusion.
RyuNagi. It's still about Ryunosuke, I know lmao. Anyway, I've discussed how I feel about the ship and other stuff about it here (read it if you haven't so what I say about them would make more sense). It's a bit all over the place discussing various stuff about them but I'll just copy-paste the bit where I talk about how it could be done better..
It had so much potential. Nagisa had to be introduced much earlier and they should've had more chapters together. Maybe, they could've made Nagisa and Ryunosuke discuss and bond over their stupid upbringing, maybe Nagisa could feel bad for Ryu, after hearing how much she wants to be a proper woman and how much her dad stopped her from enjoying herself and maybe help her enjoy things that her dad didn't allow her to (Christmas, Chocolates, etc.) and Ryunosuke fully falls for him because of his kindness... Then their romance would've felt even more natural.
I think the RyuNagi growth would take place before Ryunosuke's reconciling with her dad in case you want a timeline and by that time Ryu would properly be into Nagisa so the romance between them still stays, even after her being effeminate.
Introduce Inaba a bit earlier and give him another storyline with Shinobu. I feel like we still don't know much about Inaba and his dynamic with Shinobu entirely and that's like my only issue about Inaba and InaShino really, so have a storyline after they started dating where we can see how they bounce off each other and truly show that they're perfect couple, idk I just want more cute stuff for them, maybe Shinobu stands up for Inaba when the other bunnies bully him, maybe we get to know more about Inaba's interests and hobbies and maybe we can have the gag stuff be silly interactions between them and maybe Ataru (and Lum) spying on them or something idk.
Give great characters who don't have much spotlight what they need. Oyuki is a good example of this since she appears the least among Lum's alien friends. I saw someone online state that Kurama should've been brought back later on, instead of just disappearing, and could've attempted to mate with Tobimaro or Shingo; and I totally agree with it.. For the former, it could worked as an Asuka plotline and could've been a great arc and for the latter, it could be chaotic since Shingo doesn't know how to respect women. These two are the main examples but there may be others..
And that's all that comes to mind now. These are like the major, main ones and there might be others but they're probably incredibly minor or I just forgor about them..
#thanks for the ask!#sorry i was two days late in answering#blog management and the new episode kept me busy#also i find it funny that nagisas debuting next episode and i got an ask where i just had to mention him while replying lol#urusei yatsura#うる星やつら#uy posting#ryunosuke fujinami#mr. fujinami#nagisa shiowatari#ryunagi#inaba#shinobu miyake#inashino#ataru moroboshi#lum#fate production bureau workers#oyuki#kurama#tobimaro mizunokoji#shingo#god i love them sm
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For @para-amour and any others looking for P/C fic recs
These are some of my fave fics and authors so far:
Spontaneity by theramblinrose, I love babyfic and this story Spontaneity has one of the most loving and in character birth scenes of a P/C child where they are both present that I've seen to date in fic. You can find it linked below.
Spontaneity by theramblinrose
Then there is Cave Baby by Mighty_Oak_Roots. Basically Beverly watching "her friend and captain" Jean Luc handling an infant in an emergency situation and enjoying both his discomfort and his caring nature towards the baby in equal measure, with some longing for what could be and a cute last scene that definitely is romantic and potential family P/C. It can be accessed at the link below.
Cave Baby by Mighty_Oak_Roots
Now for two novel length fics
I loved Snow Falling Softly by Mackillian. I read it last year and was invested from the start. Without giving too much away, if one likes the plot we have this season with Jack, this is similar but on an extra intense level in terms of emotion, complexity and dynamics. It's set during TNG and It also allows Wesley to react to the storyline and process his own emotions about not being an only child and the circumstances! Highly recommend. It is however over 500 or so pages when downloaded as an epub, so even online, it is an all weekend read, at least. Link is below.
Snow Falling Softly by Mackillian
I had barely started In The Depth of Winter by Mackillian last year when I got pulled away by stuff in another fandom. It is the sequel to Snow Falling Softly. It redoes All Good Things in a way that centers the fallout from Snow Falling Softly. It seems just as good so I am looking forward to finishing it. It is 700 pages in epub though so it may need two full weekends to read. Link can be found below
The Depth of Winter by Mackillian
I am also including this single chapter vignette In Paradisum by Mackillian because it is the sequel to The Depth of Winter. I have not read it yet but skimmed the first few lines and the writing seems on par with the two novels. You need to read them to understand this piece. Link to In Paradisum ready below
In Paradisum by Mackillian
Now for authors from whom I recommend reading everything they've written for the pairing:
I am absolutely loving everything I've read so far written for P/C by pktechgirlus. The style is spot on and very emotional while also at times being humorous and steamy. My favorite so far from this author is the story "Never And Always" but all I've read so far are incredible. Some are semi explicit, some are not (Warning, not all end happily) Here is the link to the author's TNG fics,
pktechgirlus's TNG Fics for P/C
There is also one for them from the Picard era which I love too, you can find that below
Vignette by pktechgirlus
And finally, the author I feel has the most solid, in character grasp on P/C in totality. @ussjellyfish. I adore reading their work because they understand the multi facets and deep humanity that is at the core of P/C. They can both perfectly write P/C playing on the holodeck, or saving each other from certain death even by committing violence in defense of the other or breaking laws/oaths. They keep P/C's love paramount, but also allow for mistakes to be made by each and vulnerability to be shown. Even the way they write physical intimacy between P/C feels like P/C and not "insert couple here" and I usually skip sex scenes now because I've been in so many fandoms that reading those scenes are a dime a dozen , but not those written by USSJellyfish, they actually make me care about seeing these characters enjoy each other.
They have both long novel length fics for P/C that are part of a series. and shorter one shot pieces.
The novel series starts with the fic Fair Trade and is several novel length fics long. I haven't finished the entire series yet but I am enthralled by what I have finished of it.
And some of my favorite shorter fics of theirs for P/C are Kindling and Lifeline, both are hurt/comfort fics of a sort. Kindling is explicit.
As I said though, I recommend reading all of their fics for P/C so I am putting a link that leads to all of their P/C fic below.
USSJellyfish's P/C Fics
(They also write Beverly/Kathryn fic, Beverly/Deanna fic, Riker/ Beverly fic, and other pairings on TNG, Fic for several parings on Discovery, and for several on Voyager including Chakotay/Paris and J/C. so much to read!)
Happy reading everyone, I hope this list was helpful!
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20 questions for fic writers
Thank you to the wonderful @thisnightissparkling089 for tagging me!
1. How many works do you have on Ao3?
I have 21, and older fics on FF. My goal is to get everything I've done on Ao3 soon.
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?
51,556
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently The Rookie, but have previously written fics for The Big Bang Theory, Gilmore Girls, New Girl, and Single Parents.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
While I'm Alone and Blue as Can Be
And If You Have a Minute (Why Don't We Go)
Maybe I'm Crazy To Suppose
We Must Be Living In the Golden Age
Before I Knew It (I Became All About You)
5. Do you respond to comments?
Yes! I try to respond to all of them, but I know a few have probably slipped through the cracks.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I really don't have any! Yikes. I'm a sucker for happy or at least hopeful endings. Maybe the closest would be Who's Gonna Come Around When You Break? It's not exactly angsty, but it is on the sadder side.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Allll of them?? 😂 Here are a few on the fluffier side of endings:
Maybe I'm Crazy To Suppose
My Favorite Line Was "Can I Call You Sometime?"
The Opening Night Prolongation
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Thankfully no!
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I don't. I just can't do it.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Never written one.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I'm aware of!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not yet, but I'd certainly be open to a collab!
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Oof. I have a few in my top tier, but Chenford has probably been the most wonderful shipping experience I've ever had!
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
The thing is I absolutely want to finish all my fics! The most obvious answer is my Gilmore Girls multi-chapter A Tale in Prose of Fire since it hasn't been updated in *checks date* SIX years. But I know what I want to do with it, and I still plan to finish it. I also have an unpublished Single Parents fic I've been planning since 2020, and knowing literally only a handful of people would read it hasn't given me much motivation to work on it.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I LOVE writing dialogue, and I think it's what hopefully stands out in my fics. I've been told several times that my dialogue sounds just like the characters, which in fanfic, I can't think of a better compliment! So that's what I always strive for.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I'm not always the best at fully setting the scene, or getting into more minute details that can enhance the story. I also don't take enough risks in my writing, which isn't a big deal in writing a fluffy one-shot, but in some other pieces I've written over the years, I feel like the stakes could've been higher.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I haven't done it before, and probably the only language I'd feel even the slightest bit comfortable attempting would be Spanish. I'm nowhere near fluent, but know enough I could put some sentences together.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
My beloved Shamy from The Big Bang Theory. It's been 10 years since I wrote my first fanfic!
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
For my older ones, I love The Relationship Recalibration, especially a specific chapter that was a departure from anything I'd done before. I also love the previously mentioned A Tale In Prose of Fire even though it's still incomplete. And of more recent fics, I'm really proud of what I was able to put together in I Need Your Runway Lights To Burn For Me.
Tagging @sgtbradfords, @firstdegreefangirl, @americorys, @wanna-be-bold, and anyone else who would like to do this!
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You Had Me From Hello
The Writing Contest - Chapter 1: You Had Me From Hello
Summary: Unexpectedly, small town woman Nora Delaine wins a writing contest and is flown first class to Salinas Valley to meet her new screenwriting partner.
Pairing: Javi Gutierrez x Female!OC (Nora Delaine)
Rating: 18+ Series
Word Count: 5,500(ish)
Warnings: Second person POV, mentions of drug use/addiction/loss and troubles with unhealthy family dynamics.
Author’s Note: I took inspiration for Javi's new home from this moodboard made by @wildemaven.
xxx
This is insane. I can't believe I'm actually going through with this.
That's what you were thinking as you settled into your seat in first class on a Southwest Airline plane headed for the airport in Monterey, California where you would then take a taxi to Salinas Valley, arguably the capital of the wine industry in the United States. But that's not why you were headed there. Nope.
You were headed to one of the vineyards, but it wasn't to taste test wine and forget your troubles, it was to write with an apparently well known up-and-coming screenwriter named Javi Gutierrez, who until last week you personally hadn't known existed. Your best friend, Sierra Washington, however, had apparently heard plenty of him.
x
"You didn't!" you gasped, letting the letter in your hands float down to your kitchen table.
"I did!" your friend Sierra confirmed, grinning ear to ear.
"You entered my short story into a writing contest without my permission?" you hissed. You didn't feel that it had been anywhere near ready to be seen by anyone outside Sierra. When you'd sent her the document to proof read you'd trusted her not to share it with anyone else, and she'd betrayed that trust. You were furious.
"Aw, Nora, you were never going to release that document to anyone else if I didn't do it myself," she argued, placing a hand on her hip. "How many stories have I proof read for you? I loved every bit of them, yet every single one eventually ended up hidden in a file on your laptop and forgotten."
"They weren't good enough," you told her.
"Nothing ever is," she said, throwing her hands up in frustration. "You were stuck! You needed a little push. This is it. An opportunity to turn your story into a movie. Your dream!"
"I can't go to Salinas Valley for two months," you howled. "I haven't even found a new job yet!"
You'd recently been laid off from the pet magazine you'd been writing for since you turned twenty-five, nearly ten years ago, because of budget cuts a month ago and were having difficulty finding another job like it. You feared you might end up having to take a local job, instead of an online one, most likely waiting on tables. The thought of that made you cringe. You didn't like having to deal with the public. Even in a town as small as yours.
"Precisely!" Sierra exclaimed. "You need to work, and that's what this would be. You'd turn your story into a properly lengthy script with his help, and when it is bought you'll get money for it, along with some profits later on when the film is successful."
You snorted. "When?"
She narrowed her eyes at you. "When." Her tone was firm, certain.
You couldn't understand why she had so much faith in you when you'd spent most of your life failing. You'd struggled in college and you'd struggled to find a job and keep it for years. Writing for the pet magazine had felt mundane as far as writing went, but you'd been good at it and you'd finally felt like you had secured your future.
You should've known better with how the world was changing. Your generation and younger didn't read magazines anymore. You'd entered a dying industry that likely had an expiration date that would come before your retirement age.
"I can't afford to pay for another rent while I stay there," you continued.
She huffed. "Did you not read the part where it says all expenses will be paid? You'd be staying at his vineyard for free. You'd just need cash for extras. Like if you want take out or something."
"Staying at his vineyard..." You shook your head and met her copper brown eyes with your emerald green ones. "You really think I should be staying at a strange man's house, by myself?"
"He has tons of staff," she argued. "It's not much different from going on vacation and staying in a hotel by yourself."
You gave her an exasperated look. "That's way different! It's a private business and his staff aren't going to be there at night unless his runs it twenty-four seven."
"He knows Nic Cage," Sierra informed you, like that would make a difference to you. "They're friends. Javi's first screenplay was co-written with him."
You rolled your eyes. "Just cause you had a crush on Nic Cage in high school after you watched City of Angels and researched him, doesn't mean you know him and his friends."
"I did NOT have a crush on him," Sierra nearly shouted. "He's like three times my age."
"You did then."
"I did not."
You smirked and lifted your brows. "Thou protest too much."
She gritted her teeth, knowing full well that she wouldn't be able convince you otherwise. Because she had, in fact, had a celebrity crush on Nic Cage in high school.
She sighed. "Look. Sometimes you've got to take risks to gain the rewards. You can buy pepper spray when you land in California or something if it'll make you feel better. But I haven't heard anything about Javi Gutierrez that would suggest he'd be dangerous. And you wouldn't be sleeping in his mansion. You'd be in a guest house on the opposite side of the property. It overlooks some beautiful hills and valleys apparently. I did some research on Valley View Vineyard. That's his vineyard's name, fittingly. Anyway, it's apparently gorgeous in that area."
You had to admit to yourself a part of you was very tempted to say yes, not just to having help making a screenplay and selling it, but also to living in a California vacation destination for a while. You could use a break from your hometown.
"I can't," you said stubbornly. "I can't leave Buttercup and Tux with no one to watch them, and it wouldn't be fair to them to travel them out to California by plane. I wouldn't feel good about them being in cargo either. They're delicate creatures."
Buttercup and Tux were your two pet Lop rabbits, who you'd adopted as a bonded pair from a nearby animal shelter three years ago.
"I can watch them," Sierra offered. "I've done it for you before when you stayed in the hospital last year for food poisoning."
"Don't remind me," you groaned. That week had been the worst in your life and had put you off of salmon permanently.
She winced sympathetically. "Sorry."
"Look, even if I wanted to part from them for two freakin months," you started, sighing again, "Even if I wanted to go to California and write a script with a legit screenplay writer, my parents wouldn't approve. You know how worried they get."
"Yeah, I know," Sierra said with another huff. "I grew up with the product of their paranoia."
You couldn't help but laugh a little at that. Paranoia was a fitting word for it. Your parents were worry-warts. Especially since your older brother had died, leaving you as their only living child. Saying you were overprotected seemed to put it too simply. And you in turn were very wary of the world. Maybe too much. You'd turned down a lot of interesting parties and adventures with friends in favor of safety. You'd wanted to join your high school's travel club but had chickened out. Girls got kidnapped in foreign countries, after all.
The little voice in your head telling you such things sounded more like your mother's than yours.
"They'll say no," you added.
"Good thing you're a grown ass adult," Sierra reminded you firmly. "And you could lie and say you're staying at a rental to ease their minds."
You gave her a lopsided smile. "You're a bad influence on me, Ms. Washington."
"Somebody has to be!" she claimed.
You raked a hand through your shoulder length wavy brown hair as you silently debated over what choice to make. Stay or go. Safety or risk. You chewed your lip. "Fine. I'll do it."
Sierra jumped in spot and clapped like someone half her age. She squealed for you. "Oh my god, my girl's finally breaking rules and making her dreams come true."
You pursed your lips and silently hoped she was right. After all, there were no guarantees in life.
x
The next day you'd emailed Javi's manager, Walter, who was in charge of overseeing the contest and had helped Javi narrow all the submitted stories down to one. He'd immediately booked you a flight and told you to pack your bags, after reassuring you that Javi's intentions were good. He was going to co-write with you, but you'd be the top billing writer to the screenplay. He wasn't looking to take any credit that wasn't his.
Still, as you boarded the plane one week later, you found yourself nervous about the whole deal. You'd had to sign a contract, and part of that contract had protection for you and your script, saying you had all the rights, and therefore would have the final say over how it was written and what film company got to buy it. All nice things to ease your troubled mind, but you were worried now, a bit too late, over whether or not Javi would be a good fit as a writing partner. You'd seen his first film The Unbearable Weight Of Massive Talent the same night Sierra had handed you the letter, having wanted to make sure he'd be helpful and not be a bad influence instead when it came to your writing, and that had ended your concerns over his talent. The film was a little too out there for your liking, but you saw the heart behind it, and that was something you could work with.
The main concern you'd had since then was rooted in personality. You had no idea what he was like. He was clearly rich, anyone with a successful vineyard and a mansion was, and that concerned you, a child of two full time working parents who'd struggled to provide you with everything they'd wanted to give you. You'd been taught work ethic, you'd been taught to be polite to coworkers. What were the chances he'd been too? You shouldn't assume he'd be the typical rich person seen in media. You didn't know how most rich people actually behaved, and even if most were dramatic snobby leeches, that didn't mean he was.
That didn't stop you from thinking about how he might be during the entire time it took for the plane to take off.
"Would you like some wine?" a flight attendant asked some time later, drawing you from your inner thoughts.
You glanced up at her and blinked. This was new. You'd never been offered drinks on a plane, though this was only your second time in your life, the first time being when your family took a week long trip to Disneyland. "Is it on the house?"
"Of course," she replied with a knowing smile. "First time in first class?"
"You could probably guess that just by looking at my clothes," you reckoned. Most of the people seated around you were in suits or fancy business dresses, while you were dressed in a simple pair of light blue jeans, a bubble gum pink sweatshirt, and plain white sneakers.
The flight attendant shrugged. "We don't always get people in here who dress expensively. But most know about the complementary wine."
"I might as well take some," you said, "For the full experience. Don't know the next time someone will pay a ticket for me."
She laughed. "Would you be interested in a Pinot Noir?"
You had no idea what that meant, only really knowing wine as red or white, but decided to roll with it. "Sure."
As the flight attendant poured you a drink in a proper wine glass, you noticed the name on it. Valley View Vineyard. You wondered how widespread Javi's wine was as you accepted the drink and took a cautious sip.
It was good wine. Good was a lacking word. It was excellent. Smooth, flavorful. Better than any other wine you'd ever tasted. You could only guess that it was fairly expensive and aged well. You had to restrain yourself from downing the whole thing in under a minute. Wine wasn't meant for that, even a lower class small town girl like yourself who usually drank wine from a box knew that.
You did, however, make sure to have enough time for another glass before your flight landed.
x
Monterey Regional Airport, where you landed, was twelve miles from Salinas Valley, or around twenty-five minutes away. It took you an extra five minutes to actually get to Valley View Vineyard, totaling the cost of your taxi ride to nearly one hundred dollars, something that would've made you shudder if you hadn't just flown for free. You'd have had the ride for free if you had accepted the limousine Walter had offered you, but you hadn't been about to get in one of those things with what you'd been wearing for your flight. Besides, you didn't like feeling like you were leeching, having a real need to pay for some of your trip expenses. If you and Javi were successful, you'd get way more money back in profits anyway.
Salinas Valley was cooler than you'd expected, the temperature hovering around fifty-seven degrees Fahrenheit. It was a vast improvement from the thirty-two degree average in North Dakota, but not as hot as you'd imagined the middle of California would be, even though it was coastal.
They did have plenty of sun that day, something you knew your hometown wasn't going to get for the next a few days, a couple days of clouds and a severe snowstorm expected for most of the state.
On the way to the vineyard you cracked the widow to breath in the fresh air and you stared out at the landscape as the taxi drove by it at precisely the speed limit.
Salinas was gorgeous, as Sierra had promised. You passed many luscious green fields, farmed and unfarmed alike, several vineyards, and plenty of rolling hills and valleys, the latter expected, considering the name of the county.
You were excited by the time you arrived at Valley View Vineyard, anxious to see what the property itself looked like. You'd known it was fairly massive for a vineyard, sitting on one hundred and ten acres, but when you'd looked it up online the day after you'd gotten the letter, there wasn't much photos of the place anywhere, even on the official website. Mostly it had been photos of the grapes, the wine, and the wine making process, and mainly had detailed that process and how to get your hands on a bottle. You'd avoided looking at the history page, wanting to find out from Javi himself how he came to own it.
The vineyard was gated, with elegant iron bars, and your taxi driver had to press a speaker button on a fence post to be let in. Both sides of the tarred driveway was lined with bushes, leading up to the mansion, a Spanish styled home with arches you'd never seen before outside movies and TV shows that had taken place in Spain or South America. Beyond that were grape vines in every direction until they met the hills that bordered the area.
Walter was waiting for you on the front porch, a man in his sixties, with surprisingly thick gray hair and a considerably youthful face. You imagined he had several more decades left in him if his appearance was anything to go by. It was probably in spite of his job. You couldn't imagine a manager of any kind having it too easy.
The dark gray pinsuit he was wearing made you feel very under dressed, but he shook your hand and introduced himself without even twitching an eye, and helped you carry your belongings to a yellow Jeep in the corner of the driveway.
"Javi will be here soon to personally show you around," he informed you. "I'll drop your bags off inside the guest house."
"You don't need to do that," you proclaimed, not wanting to be a burden to anyone. You didn't think it was part of a talent manager's job to bring suitcases anywhere.
"It's no problem," Walter promised you, hopping into the Jeep's driver's seat. "We will talk more later, when you are done touring, to sort out some more paperwork. Legal stuff. Stick by the front porch. That's where Javi asked me to tell you to be."
"Okay," you said, waving at him. "Thanks."
He nodded at you, a warm smile spreading across his face. "You're welcome, Miss Delaine."
"Nora," you corrected him. "I don't like formalities."
"That's something you'll have to get used to if you want to take part in Hollywood," Walter warned you, "But I will call you Nora by default, when appropriate."
Then he was on his way, leaving you to kick pebbles off the tar by the porch. It was nearly ten minutes later when you spotted a man approaching at a brisk walk from a large industrial looking building to your left.
He was wearing sunglasses, a thick long sleeved orange button down shirt, dark blue jeans, and tan boat shoes. He appeared to be in his early forties, with limited gray hair in his patchy, but well trimmed beard. His dark brown hair was short, but wildly curled, and his skin was golden, tanned from spending most of his days out in the sun.
As he neared you and pulled off his sunglasses, you noticed his eyes were dark like his hair, and that he was at least a half a foot taller than you, probably just shy of six feet. Taller than most people you'd ever been around, especially family, but not untypically tall for someone in Hollywood.
He was worthy of Hollywood, you'd thought. He was handsome, and that was an understatement as far as you were concerned. No boy in your high school graduating class could've held up beside him and you felt your insides warm as you studied him.
Easy, you silently ordered yourself. You're just here to learn script writing from him, hopefully make a movie, and go back home. Besides, looks aren't everything.
"I'm so sorry I'm late," he apologized in a rush when he got within earshot of you, "I was helping my employees clean up a wine spill."
He spoke smoothly, with an accent that was far from any you'd heard before with your own ears. South American, maybe? Spaniard? You could definitely hear an infliction there that suggested he'd grown up speaking more Spanish than English.
"Oh no," you said earnestly. "Hope it wasn't too bad."
"Nothing we can't recover from," he assured you. He broke out into a bright smile and outstretched his right hand. "Javi Gutierrez."
You shook his offered hand and beamed back at him, putting on your best friendly demeanor. "Nora Delaine."
"It's so lovely to meet you, Nora," he said, covering your hand with his left one briefly before pulling both his hands away from you. His hold on you was long enough for you to notice how large his hands were in comparison to yours, and softer than you'd expected. You tried not to think about them too much.
"Let me show you around," he continued quickly, "It will give us a chance to get to know each other, no?"
"I'd like that," you replied honestly. "I've always been curious about how wine was made."
His lips tugged back even more, and in that moment he looked like a kid on Christmas morning. Excited and wide-eyed. You wondered if he was always this happy to meet guests. "Great! This way, then."
He guided you on a stroll around the main parts of the vineyard, showing you inside the buildings where the grapes were stored, turned into wine, and where the wine was aged in barrels. He also took you through rows of grapes in the fields behind his home, detailing the care that he and his staff had to put into them before they were ready to harvest in the autumn season.
"You know your stuff," you noted as you walked shoulder to shoulder with him. "I take you're not one to observe while your employees do all the work?"
"I used to be," Javi admitted, "But when I bought this place I decided I wanted to change that. Made a point to spend some spare time helping harvest the grapes and pour the wine into the barrels. I still have much to learn. Wine making is actually interesting to watch and inspired the last script I wrote, as you might tell."
You did not mention you'd only seen his first movie, afraid to insult him. You focused on the other tidbit in his confession. "You didn't grow up here?"
"No," Javi confirmed, in the way Spanish speaking people pronounce it. "I grew up on an olive estate in Mallorca, also called Majorca, it's an island off the coast of Spain."
"Why'd you move here?" you inquired. You'd seen pictures of islands in the Mediterranean Sea, watched movies that were filmed there. Who'd want to move away from that?
He hesitated for a second before answering, shoving one of his hands into a side pocket of his jeans. "I guess you could say I needed a fresh start. And this place being a lot closer to Hollywood, I thought the move could help my career."
"Has it?"
He hummed. "I think so. But even if not, I like it here."
"So how long have you owned this place?" you asked.
"A little over two years," Javi replied. "It was already a very successful vineyard when I bought it from the previous owner's daughter who wanted nothing to do with it after he died. I kept on most of the staff, including the manager, Enzo. He's the only reason it's still successful. I hardly know enough to dare participate in the business. He's taught me everything I have managed to learn about it and I'm very grateful. He's helped me gain financial independence from my family."
There was something about how humble Javi was being about his lack of experience that made it hard for you not to like him already. He definitely did not seem like he had a spoiled rich man's attitude.
"Does your family visit?"
Javi's brows knitted together and his smile fell. "No. We do not get along, unfortunately. Not anymore. My family...they are, as some people say, toxic."
"I'm sorry." You felt bad for being nosy about it. "My parents aren't easy either, they're a bit too overprotective. In fact, I had to lie about some of the details of this project to get here. Otherwise, they'd have talked me out of it. But at least we get along enough to still care about visiting each other."
"It's a shame you had to lie," he said, "But selfishly I am glad you did whatever it took to get here. When I read your script, it drew me in like witchcraft. The way you write...it's compelling. Poetic. And for such a simple premise, you made it exciting. It made me look at a so called average life with new appreciation I did not have in my youth."
"You can thank my friend Sierra for everything," you told him. "She submitted my work. She convinced me to come."
"I owe her a debt then," he concluded, and you blushed. You knew he was saying that because he was excited to work with you, but a part of your brain had jumped to the conclusion that he owed her for you. Not like you hadn't just met.
"If you want to repay it have Nic Cage send her a message or something," you suggested. "She's a big fan."
"No way!" he exclaimed giddily, halting suddenly. "I must meet her someday! I'm a huge fan myself."
"Aren't you and Nic friends?" you quizzed, confused.
"Being a friend now does not negate the appreciation I had of his work before," he declared. "But it does mean setting up a meeting between them would be fairly easy. She could even stay with us for a time."
Us. Oh, his choice of words. You ignored the flip of your stomach. It was absurd. Javi wasn't really your type. Rich and energetic. Earnest and puppy-eyed. Right? You frowned.
He led you out of the rows of grapes to the far corner of the property where beautiful rolling hills back dropped a cozy looking two story ranch styled house that had recently been painted white. It was far more modest than his mansion, but still twice as big as your childhood home.
"That is where you'll be staying," he declared. "Do you wish to see it first or the space we'll be working in?"
"House first," you decided quickly. "I want to grab a few things from my bag to put on my desk. Assuming I'll have one?"
"Of course!"
The inside of the house was rustic. It reminded you of home, minus the buck antlers your dad had hung up on the living room wall. Not that he'd hunted a day in his life. He'd found them while hiking through the forest with the family dog in the dead of winter, the pair having naturally shed off of the deer they had once been attached to.
"This is wonderful," you commented as your eyes fell on your bags by the staircase. Walter had dropped them off as promised.
Javi beamed at you. "I am glad you like it. I admit, it's not my style."
"It wouldn't be, would it?" you mused. "This is very western themed, not island."
"It was once a place for temporary employees to stay," he informed you. "It was remodeled and decorated this way before I bought it. I just haven't bothered to change it."
"There's nothing that needs changing," you told him surely. You weren't going to allow anyone to insult the taste of most of your hometown.
He chuckled. "Maybe not."
You reached for one of your smaller bags and pulled out a stuffed giraffe and a photo of your two rabbits, plus another of a man your age, military short hair and a wide grin on his face.
"Is that your boyfriend?" Javi inquired curiously.
You shook your head somberly. "No, this is Kip, my brother. Was, rather. He overdosed on opioids last April."
Javi expressed honest dismay. "Oh no. I am so sorry. Were you close?"
"Very," you answered, chewing your lip, remembering the last time when Kip was alive and truly happy. It was far too long ago to be comforting. "He was only older than me by a year. Was quite different than me though. Very independent. Whenever my parents told him to do something he did the opposite. That's how he ended up in the military. It's how he ended up a war veteran with a bad back, which led doctors to treating him with strong drugs and in turn got him addicted to them."
"There are no words," Javi said gently, squeezing your arm at the elbow. "Is he going on your desk?"
"The fire mantle," you told him, heading for the fireplace in the living room and placing the framed photo on the shelf above it, carefully setting it there. You returned to Javi's side after. "Now I'm ready to check out the office."
He must have sensed that you didn't want to discuss your brother anymore because he just nodded and followed you out of the house.
x
The inside of Javi's mansion was...excessive. Six bedrooms, six full sized bathrooms to go with them, another two basic bathrooms (one for each floor), a massive kitchen and living room, a dining room, a personal office, a game room, a movie theater, and a sun room. There was a double stairway of course, and the rooms were mostly white, with some gold and black accents.
While you weren't a huge fan of overly sized houses and lack of color, you had to admit it was impressive, and some of the rooms were charming, likely thanks to a talented interior decorator.
One of the most charming rooms was the sun room, with all of its natural light and green house plants in vases. There were even a few vines hanging from the walls. It was the last room on the tour.
"This is where we'll be working," Javi informed you, nodding at the two desks set up in a corner. "I like writing out here. Feels too stuffy in the office. What do you think?"
"It's beautiful in here," you commented, awe in your voice. "I'm sure I'll get plenty of inspiration from it."
"Great!" Javi exclaimed, clapping his hands together, startling you. "I'll give you some time to fix up your desk to your liking, the one closest to the door, and have you meet me out back for dinner when you're ready."
"Dinner?" you questioned, frowning.
"Is it supper where you're from?" Javi asked when he noticed your confusion.
"Yes, but it's not that," you replied, explaining, "I didn't know I'd be eating with you tonight."
"Is that a problem?"
"No," you said a little too fast, cheeks threatening to turn red. "I just didn't expect it."
"As long as you're on this property you will never need to cook unless you wish to," Javi told you. "The chef here is excellent and always cooks up way too much for me. You'd be doing me a favor by joining me. And I'd like to get to know you a little more before we start writing together tomorrow."
"Would it be rude to ask what's on the menu?" you inquired.
He grinned. "Not at all. It's shrimp scampi tonight. Though there are alternatives available if you are allergic or vegan."
"I'm not, and I would never say no to shrimp," you declared.
He chuckled at your enthusiasm. "Good. Dinner will be served in thirty minutes, until then -"
"You'll be out on the back patio area," you finished for him.
He nodded. "Just through the doors."
He backed out of the room through a pair of beautifully detailed white doors and you could see him sit down in one of the patio chairs. He pulled out his phone and made a call you could not hear from inside and you forced yourself to look away, not wanting to be caught staring like a creepy stalker.
You placed your stuffed toy giraffe on the center of your desk next to the tape and stapler, along with the framed photo of your rabbits, before plopping down in the chair behind it to open up the new laptop you'd been gifted.
It was sooo fast to start up, and the perfect size for you. You hoped at the end of the two months you were staying that you'd be able to keep it. Especially after you went on to spend the half hour Javi had given you setting up the laptop, which included adding giraffe wallpaper to the main screen.
Once you were done, with a few minutes to spare, you stepped outside.
The back patio was made of gorgeous red brick and covered with more plant vases. The standard pool and hot tub were beside a four person outdoor table with an umbrella for shade.
The area looked so peaceful and dreamy that you weren't sure a space could get better until you laid eyes on the mini pond a yard away from the glass table, and noticed the brightly colored fish swimming in it. Fish splattered and patched with reds, oranges, blues, and blacks on their white bodies.
"Koi fish?" you quizzed when Javi glanced up at you from reading an email on his phone.
"Came with the house," he told you. "But I kept them cause I decided I liked them. Do you like Koi?"
You nodded. "I always wanted to have some of my own someday. But North Dakota winters would be hard for them to combat and Koi are expensive."
"Well, you can come back here and watch them whenever you like while you're staying here," Javi said. "Maybe they'll inspire you."
"A sun room and a Koi pond." You smirked. "Careful, you might not be able to get rid of me."
Javi parted his lips and closed them like he was going to say something but decided not to, and you blinked curiously at him. What had he been wanting to say but thought was best not said?
"Dinner is served!" a woman who was most likely Javi's chef, shouted.
He beamed at you. "Prepare to have the best shrimp in your life."
x
Javi was right, the shrimp was amazing, and the company continued to be pleasant. It was just you and him for an hour, the chef checking in briefly on occasion to offer wine and water refills and several well spaced out courses of Mediterranean food. You were stuffed when you were finished, and you wanted to sit by the Koi pond and digest, but you thought it would be best not to overstay your welcome.
"Well, I'd better go," you announced, trying to sound casual, as you stood back up. You were about to fish for some answers to questions that had been dancing around in your head all day. "I'm sure your girlfriend - or boyfriend - will want me out of the house when they get here."
"Neither," Javi told you, smiling as if he knew you were digging for information. He probably did. You were rarely subtle. "I'm not dating anyone right now. My last girlfriend moved to America with me but after living together for a month we realized we were better just as friends and she went back to Spain."
You winced. "I'm sorry to hear that."
"It's okay," he assured you. "We're still friends."
Friends? The word shouldn't have made your stomach flip as it did.
"Good," you murmured, not sure what else to say to a statement like that. "Too many of my past relationships ended nasty or by ignoring each other awkwardly."
You sighed and stretched your right hand out. He stood and shook it again. "Goodnight, Nora."
"Goodnight, Javi."
With that, you left him physically, but your brain didn't. For half the night you couldn't help replaying the time you'd spent with him, committing it to memory.
It had been a great first day, but you feared that you were already tempted to enter a dangerous game.
The kind of game that could break your heart.
xxx
Tagged: @harriedandharassed
xxx
Series Masterlist
Main Masterlist
xxx
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Howdy, all! I can't post my art summary quite yet because it contains part of someone's Secret Santa gift, so I thought I would fill out the fic summary template created by @reliablejoukido (see her original post here!). Even though I didn't publish (or finish!) much, I did start writing again this year, and that feels like a huge accomplishment, so it seemed like it would be fun to look back and talk a little bit about what I have in the works.
First, the finished fic!
My er... grand return to writing (I wouldn't call it that, but I did have a lot of fun writing and drawing for it, even if it took 6+ months from start to finish ^^;). I love these three characters as a trio so much. It was really hard to pull out a quote I liked and have it make sense in context, so I put the summary in there... but since I brought it up in another post, I thought I'd share what one of my editing drafts looks like:
(ok, so maybe not the tiniest font imaginable, but sometimes there are cross-outs to the cross-outs and sometimes I DO run out of room near troublesome paragraphs and in the margins!)
Now, onto WIPs!
Hmm, well! That sure is a title, isn't it? ;) I wanted to write Junzumi and came up with this idea late last year, and finally started trying to figure it out. It's meant to be fun and flirty and a bit awkward, but the ultimate goal is to be kind to JP, because he (and his body) are given so little love overall. And even though JP and Zoe are not actually hooking up in this fic, it is meant to show the relationship between the two of them in college, and how they could start going from friendship to dating. There IS nudity, but it's meant to be tasteful and respectful, I promise!
Oof. I haven't forgotten this fic, I swear (even though I published Chapter 4 three years ago!). I got really excited to work on it earlier this year (flush with success from actually publishing something, rotfl!) and then let it continue to languish (orz). Upon reflection, the reason it's been stalled is I was having a hard time figuring out the flow of action, but after re-outlining it in September I think I know now what Maki needs to be doing in order to experience the emotions I always meant her to be feeling in this chapter. And yes, she and Meiko meet (yay!).
Chapter 6 has been done for YEARS, and Chapter 7's probably pretty close to done as well, so it really is just this chapter being the hold-up.
AKA, Garg Fic #1. Been mulling over ideas for fic for this fandom all summer, and finally decided to write one based on some minor characters from the SLG comics (that I didn't even read, and can't read now because they're out of print). But I AM reading the new Dark Ages comics, and I'm proving to be a really good guesser about certain details, so actually, I feel INCREDIBLY validated about my original vision and characterization, ahaha.
As you may be able to tell from the quote selection, this is not a happy story. But I believe it's a story worth telling. It's about preserving customs in the face of tragedy, and mourning, and extinction, and love.
AKA, the thing that pulled me away from writing Garg Fic #1. I was possessed. I was writing something in my head about Macbeth's relationship with Demona this summer, and suddenly (VERY suddenly) it morphed into this. Dang, but they're fun to think about. This fic is weird, it will contain one MAJOR narrative trope/cliche, and it's definitely going to be NSFW if I end up getting that far. But I reeeeeeally like this paragraph I wrote for it XD
Thanks for the template Zuz, and thanks to everyone else for letting me ramble about writing! See you again for the art roundup!
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hm here's an update on how i've been doing
i went on a band trip last week that took a lot out of me emotionally, but it was fun also? sometimes life is weird like that. like maybe you had something annoying happen to you but then that annoyance leads to a bitch session that leaves you closer to someone else, maybe in a way that you wouldn't have known before. so idk. good and bad. you're just supposed to have both, i guess.
as i've been away, i haven't been writing much besides paradisium. paradisium, despite only requiring 500 words a day, sometimes feels like a real slog. i dont think i had a super clear idea of the middle of this story, so trying to figure it out is a challenge.
now that i'm thinking about it, a lot of my stories start that way? i have a very clear beginning point, a very clear end point, and the middle is like jeremy bearimy. like how do you unravel a knot that was tied in the fabric of time? you cant, of course. you just try and hack away at it with a butter knife
summer pretty much started for me last week as i don't follow the calendar dates for seasons. seasons should be entirely Vibes based. so anyway summer started last week and i can't wait for it to be over. counting down the days pretty much.
i'm not really looking forward to my birthday, but it will be pretty cool to hopefully be finished paradisium by then. lets all put our hands together in prayer.
oh yeah. i was gonna say... today i started writing iatbye again after an extended absence and tiana happened to catch me with a call in the middle of it (usually i write in blocks of 1k, so i think of .5 as my halfway point). as i was talking to her i was like man, this is a terrible time to talk to me because all my thoughts are completely absurd and strange and weird, like i told her that the horse is a metaphor and she's like yeah of course it is and then i explained the metaphor at her for 5 minutes and then the next 5 minutes i told her about my anxieties about the next two chapters for iatbye and why that's probably contributed to my lack of energy to write it
yeah chapter 12 is like, the climax of this part. the way that chapter 17 and 25 were those big emotional moments for part one, chapter 12 will be the emotional centerpiece of part two. so it's like. you know, i'm sure it will be fine, and truthfully it doesn't matter if it sucks bc im not being graded and its just for fun, whatever whatever, but at the same time, i have these Standards TM for myself that i almost certainly can't live up to. so its worrisome. you can write things a thousand different ways, and i have to try to write it the Right way. so i worry over it.
sidlink is still on the backburner. i know in some way or another what i wanna do with that fic but its just too wide open right now for me. i need to finish an iatbye chapter to like. get back into my groove. get some confidence back or something.
so idk. that's how i am now mostly. i mostly exist in a state of depressed (and i mean that in the squashed sort of depressed way, not big sad kind of depressed way) anxiety. like most of the time i can deal with it but then ill get hit with this wave that just like waterboards me lmao
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I have never had to make a seder for Passover, and I haven't attended more than two seders in my life: I am by upbringing and heritage a Gentile.
I have, however, with assistance, made a Reform seder for Passover in New York City, in Sidney Freedman's West Side home, those present a nice assortment of nuts and fruits.
And I was not able to use the orange on the seder plate, because this seder for Passover takes place on 8th April 1963, which is thirty years too early for Susannah Heschel's inspired addition. Sidney Freedman in my story is sixty years old in 1963: it's just possible he lived long enough to add an orange to his seder plate on Passover - because, after he came back from Korea, he and his lover decided this was the night they would welcome the stranger and feed the famished within their gates.
Sidney Freedman, 1963
In research for this one chapter, I read a lot of haggadot, and looked in particular for a Reform Haggadah that was old enough to have been the one Sidney and his lover would have had multiple copies of in the 1960s. (I went with the 1923 Union Haggadah - the revised edition is still available.)
I looked up endless Sephardic recipes for Passover. Most of them don't actually show up in the story, except for dafina.
And not exactly for research, but for the story: I watched a whole lot of Passover episodes. I listened to Six13 on Youtube. I read Herman Wouk's novel Marjorie Morningstar, which I cannot honestly recommend, and Georgia Hunter's novel We Were the Lucky Ones, which was great. (Full disclosure: I could not actually finish Wouk's novel. I'd got it out of the library for the seder chapter, and I skim-read the rest of it.) I was trying to think my way into how to write the seder chapter I'd planned for All We Know when I had realised with the thoughtless cheerfulness of the pre-first-draft writer that the date of Passover in 1963 fitted very neatly into the timeline of my story, and fitted too my thoughts about Hawkeye Pierce being Jewish and non-practicing.
I know this is going to sound weird, but the moment when things clicked with me and I thought "I can write this" was when I was attending my local Transgender Memorial Day reading of the names, as a hench of the Order of Perpetual Indulgence. As a cis lesbian, I didn't have anything to contribute, except to stand there in my henching robes and bear witness, and what I thought was (forgive me if this sound awfully Gentile): There are some things that are important to do, and we do them every year, because we need to remember, to publicly bear witness, to tell the story. To outsiders this may look silly, but we are not doing it for them but for us: we share our stories, we remember our history, we ensure our past is not forgotten.
When I - as I thought then - finished writing Sins and Virtues in 2006, "Jewish Hawkeye Pierce" wasn't a fannish concept. (Alan Alda talking about how Passover is his favourite holiday is probably the origin.) But as I was thinking through the story I meant to write, of the year July 1962 to July 1963, the more I felt "Hawkeye is Jewish" would work for the story. What had not occurred to me as I finished writing the short chapters of February and the long, long chapters of March, and began - last November - to think about Hawkeye and Mulcahy going to the seder for Passover that Sidney Freedman is making - a sober seder for his friends - was how gormlessly little I knew.
So I did what you have to: I wrote the shitty first draft. And then I rewrote it. And then I asked a friend if she would sanity-check it for me, and she said no, because British seders are different from East Coast Reform seders, and she referred me on to another friend, who very generously read the chapter and sent me multiple line-edits and suggestions and saved me from at least three major howlers and I am endlessly grateful to him. (Thank you, Rich.)
(My demonic proofreader also gave it her usual seeing-to, which was as consistently helpful as ever. )
So there it is: Hawkeye Pierce's Pesach, 1963, the latest chapter of All We Know.
#hawkeye pierce#hawkeye/mulcahy#hawkahy#my fanfic#all we know#mashposting#passover#pesach#sidney freedman
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State of the Fic(s)
I know it's not Wednesday, but I've had a crazy week. I think to start the new week, I should do a state of the current projects in my 'wip' folder, simply because I've not done one in awhile.
So! Here's a list of current projects I've got going in the 'fic-o-sphere' so to speak that gives you some updates on what's going on with them!
FFXV Related
dal segno al coda
The whole crazy long FFXV fanfic that I've been working on. I had a breakthrough over the weekend that got me out of a rut on part 1, and have decided that something I wrote that wouldn't actually get released at any point probably will (not related to Ad Astra below). It'll be a long time, though, since it's a post-story short.
I've had a goal for awhile that I wanted to have the fic in editing phase by the end of the year, but I'm not sure I'm going to meet that goal at the moment.
Oh yeah. Meanwhile, Elsewhere - the batches of outside POV stories to go alongside events during the main story - has been renamed to Colla Parte. I'm sad to lose the joke based on FFXIV, but I think it's also better to make it line up more to the music theming going on in the names.
There are still the two preview fics:
We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Programming - this is an outside POV fic just before the endgame of the story. It introduces a pair of original characters that were, at first, mentioned on the side, and grew into their own parts.
Date Night - About halfway through the story, Noctis and Lunafreya are reunited and spend a period of time in Insomnia together. I didn't have the space or timing for a lot of what I wanted to do, so I decided to use the ideas as a short with them together in it. It is currently at 2 of 4 chapters, and helps give an idea of the storytelling style/formatting used for the main story.
Twilight
So I'm still picking at this AU in spite of having the fic done. There are a variety of shorts in it still. (If you haven't read it yet, and are interested, the main story for Twilight is available on AO3.)
Sunburned, as part of the On the Job shorts got posted this week.
There are several others in the works, as listed below, all working titles:
There are two more shorts in the On the Job file that are in progress. There may be more in the future.
Group Chat - A batch of unused group texts that I didn't have space for in the main story.
Some Things Never Change - A short of Noct running into Sania.
The Puzzle Box - This is waiting for a chapter of On the Job to be done first, but it's about Noct making his puzzle box that's mentioned in the main story.
A Part to Play - A surprising addition that is turning out to be a bit more world building to the AU than I expected, but Noct is hired to join a small team on a very special project.
There are still some others that I wanted to write that I have in a checklist. I had an Aranea story I wanted to use in the main fic, but never had the space for it. There's another sidestory that's started, but untitled based on an incident that is mentioned in both Twilight and A New Restart.
Hell Diving
So. Uh. This is a stupid thing that's got stuff marked all over and will be a bit more "multimedia"-y of a fic than my others.
Basically, a silly one-shot crossover fic of the chocobros play Helldivers. So. Yeah. thats' a thing.
It just needs a lot of specific creative work to be done before I get into straight up writing it.
Untitled Long Night Story
This whole thing is currently set on the sidelines since I've had a lot of focus on other things. It's still there, and the whole fic just took a bit of a change in terms of storytelling.
I'll get to it. Maybe I'll have this prepared for Halloween this year. That'll be a nice setup.
Ad Astra
A really bizarre/headtrippy followup to dal segno al coda that I wasn't sure I wanted to post. I can't explain anything about this story without spoiling its sister story.
A lot of the notetaking that turned into this was originally to map out the world building that happens endgame in dal segno al coda. It's just come together to make enough for a fic of its own.
Sadly, I'm not 100% sure I have the chops to tell this story well, though.
Non FFXV Stuff:
Random Questions
I'm still working on this! It's still mapped out! It's just that FFXV is back to living rent free in my head right now.
There is also a follow-up to go along with it. I can't post anything from said follow-up until Random Questions is finished, however.
Payday
oh huh. look. a random kiseki/trails fic in the list. I wonder what this could be.
During Yuletide, my assignment had Ys and Crossbell arc stories listed in their requests. A Little Doll's Big Adventure almost didn't get written in lieu of this fic instead, which was a Tio centric story that may end up being way too relatable. I may still write it, as it's outlined.
Lost Traveller
Huh. I wonder what this is...
The Haunting of Karen Jackson
This is a Phasmophobia fic idea I got into my head. It'll be treated as a dossier/report rather than a traditional story. Like with Hell Diving, there are other things I need to prep before I can work on this.
#fanfic wips#dal segno al coda stuff#final fantasy xv#lost universe#phasmophobia#helldivers#ys#kiseki
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For writer's ask....
3, 8, 10, 16, 24, 30, 34, 38, and 49!
Thank you :3
Ohh, so many, I like it! Thank you for asking~ Writer's ask game here.
3 Computer or pen and paper?
Oh, I love writing with pen and paper.... but for convenience, computer :>
8 Oldest WIP
Dated October 2020... This work is supposed to be a series of 9 stories. I published 8 of them already but I just haven't finished the final and last story. It's a Tantei Gakuen Q (Detective School Q) fanfiction, set after the ending of the manga. I used the lyrics from the Opening Luvly, Merry-Go-Round as the titles for the series and the stories. The WIP is titled Forever, under this sky, which is supposed to be the ending or of the series.
10 Do you set yourself deadlines?
Usually no. I did it once for my longest fanfic in Saiyuki, challenging myself to publish a chapter once a week. It was a good exercise, but not doing it again :')
16 How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied with a project?
I don't usually count it.... so honestly I don't have any idea :') I edit my writings a lot though, maybe more than thrice?
24 Favourite genre to write and read
Angst, hurt/comfort <3
30 Favourite idea you haven’t started on yet
Yuumori medical au based on this. I've been thinking to plot out a fanfic out of it.
34 What was the hardest scene you ever had to write?
Out of Breath, one of my WIP that I plan to give up :/ The whole idea was that Goku learned to control his chi from Hakkai so that he could heal Sanzo who's getting lung disease from smoking too much. I started to get stuck in Chapter 4, when Goku's chi getting stronger in his body but he still couldn't let it out, and Sanzo was aware of that. The tension between them... Yeah I spent so much time in editing the chapter and I am still not satisfied with what I published lol.
38 Weirdest story idea you’ve ever had
Is this weird? I don’t know, you make the call… and yes, it’s another WIP :’)
Koumyou woke up besides Ken’yuu in a hospital room. After a week they both finally realized that Koumyou was a ghost. They try to find out why Koumyou was a ghost and not reincarnated as he was supposed to.
49 Which character would you most want to be friends with, if they were real?
Goku. He's just that sunshine my dark soul needs. He's so friendly and positive and accepting and adventurous, and he's not giving up even though bad things happen. Sanzo is so lucky :3
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Updates
Hey all! It's been a little over two weeks since I posted the last chapter on ASLI, and with the way the last few months have gone, I just thought I'd provide an update on how things are going.
A Shared Likeness & Intensity: Currently going through the AO3 chapters and making notes on what I need to change, update. There are several small changes/fixes I'd like to make (such as solidifying and nailing down dates, or fixing Ingrid's early description to match her later appearance).
To Stand Against the Dark: Chapter 7 (Wow, am I really on chapter 7 in this?) is in the planning stages of my writing process, it's next on my list of things to write. We're going to be dealing with a little of the aftermath of the last chapter. If you haven't read it yet, you're in for what I think is a nice twist on 3h's original plot.
Through Time's Tarnish: Entry #4 is, I think, going to be a nice non-linear flashback, to a time I don't cover in any one of my stories: the Holy Tomb. Obviously, featuring my SS Byleth, you're in for a lot of angst.
The Scars We Can't Erase: This collab fic with @artofsitriga/@sitrigachaoscorner is really one of my joys of opportunity. Definitely a passion project and labor of love, but we've figured out our long-term narrative structure and have been working on our entries for chapter 2, which is gonna tell you the beginning of the story we're telling. (Side note: I hate that AO3 doesn't give you the option for a Chapter 0 or prologue. Because this chapter would technically be Chapter 1) The story will then proceed in a frame-story style! I'm excited. And honestly, this 'epic fantasy' approach to writing FE3H is fun!
On another note, I've done a little bit of rebranding. Ever since I coined the phrase "silly sapphic with a penchant for trauma" back in one of the earlier chapters of ASLI, I've fallen in love with the moniker. So you can now find me on Twitter @sillysaffic (why two ff's instead of a pph, you ask? Because Xbox and censoring are dumb and filter the word "sapphic" hahaha). If and when I get a different social media, more than likely I will be using that (or a similar) handle.
#a shared likeness & intensity#to stand against the dark#through time's tarnish#the scars we can't erase#fe3h edelgard#fe3h byleth#edelgard von hresvelg#byleth eisner#edeleth
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1.30.24
i am drinking longan, red date, and goji berry tea. lately i've really taken to it and have been drinking it every night. it makes me feel like an old apothecary, reaching into my cabinet to find the jars of dried herbs and tossing a little bit of this and that into my cup to brew my nightly health elixir. this particular combination is great to drink in the winter and can help with blood circulation (something i am always in need of). it's warming my cold fingers as i write this.
lately whenever i open up twitter wanting to tweet something, i just get overwhelmed and i end up closing the app with a slight sigh. i don't feel bad. people take breaks from fandom all the time. but it always feels a bit difficult to come back and makes me question if i even should. i do feel a little bad about the messages in my ao3 inbox that i haven't responded to yet. i feel an obligation to the people who read my writing even though it's an obligation not tied by anything except a love for fanworks. and nearly all of those people are extremely patient and understanding of me.
truthfully, i haven't really been excited about genshin and genshin fandom lately. the excitement will come back (maybe soon, with the new patch) and maybe i'll dive back into it with a renewed vigor. but for now, i'm letting myself enjoy other things. (i have caught up on a lot of shows and books recently and it's felt really nice).
i also have had some major life updates recently. it's a little scary but change is always like that. despite the good things, i still feel a strange string of melancholy and dread permeating through my days. the universe has granted me the blessing of something new, so i should welcome it with open arms and here i am, always waiting for the other shoe to drop. i always expect awful things to happen, because in my life, something good is always accompanied by something disastrous. my therapist and i talked about how i am like orpheus looking back at the last second, wondering, "is it really true? is everything i love gonna follow me?" only to find my own shadow staring back at me. funny, how that story goes. i'll do my best to resist looking back.
anyway, despite how inactive i've been, i still have been writing though. quite a bit, surprisingly. i've been pouring a lot into this haikaveh/kavetham wip recently (a ship that i never thought i'd ever write for. but maybe it's bc of my life recently and i've been feeling like a kaveh kinnie). it's currently at 20k words and writing it has made me fall in love with writing again. partially i think it's because i haven't announced much about it (or made the mistake of eagerly posting the first chapter before it's all finished) and there are no expectations, just me and my outline and a cup of tea. it feels so much better writing when i let go of the perceived expectations i have for myself. i feel so creative lately. maybe the best work really does come from stillness and endurance. i've outlined tbal all the way to the end (although writing it has been admittedly difficult. there's something bittersweet to me, thinking about tbal ending). and also, i'm extremely grateful to have been accepted into 2 zines recently (meriwether: an anemo boys zine! and another, secret one that i'm not sure i'm allowed to announce yet) and i'm really excited about the pitches i made for those. i can't wait to share it all soon. if you are waiting, thank you for your patience.
if you've read through this rambling personal update, thank you. i hope life has been treating you well. and if life hasn't, then i hope you're treating yourself well. i hope you have things that bring you joy and that your hands are always warm and if not, then i'll recommend some longan, red date, and goji berry tea. cheers, minh.
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