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braiawrites · 3 years

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Lost & Found - Chapter 3

Summary: A messenger fills Jude and Madoc in on important news. Jude and the cat pay a visit to the palace. || Inspired by this prompt by @newblood-freya

Words: 3188

Rating: T

Warnings: Brief description of a murder in the first section.

Links:

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CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER FOUR

Prompt by newblood-freya

Read it on AO3

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Send me an ask!

A/N: So I thought writing a multi-chapter would be much easier once I had a solid plot laid out but when I tell you I was dragging words out by my teeth—yeah, I'm not super happy with this chapter but it's here and technically I had it finished in time, just not posted so uh. Good for me? Yeah I'll shut up now, here's chapter 3.

***

Dead. One of the princes was dead.

Jude stood stock still for a long moment, the shock on her face palpable as the words echoed in her mind.

Prince Dain was dead. Did that mean Cardan was, too?

Finally, she swallowed and took a shaky breath. “Prince Dain is dead?"

“Did you not know?” Madoc’s voice was heavy, his eyes sharp.

“No,” Jude gasped. “No, I–no. I thought this was about Cardan. I thought—I don’t know what, exactly, but not this.”

Madoc ran a large hand over his jaw, and then—

“Sit.” He gestured to one of the chairs set along the wall. “You might as well stay to hear the rest.”

She nodded numbly, hesitating before turning to the chair. The cat was standing next to her, black fur fluffed up and small body trembling, his eyes fixed on her foster father. He seemed as horrified as she felt.

“Your guest can stay as well,” Madoc said, tilting his head curiously at the cat. “We will talk about keeping pets later.”

With a nod, she scooped him up as she moved to sit down, tucking the trembling form into herself. She wanted to murmur comforts into his soft black fluff—as much for him as for herself, she suspected—but with Madoc and the messenger looking on, she settled for soothingly stroking the length of his back.

Madoc turned his attention to the messenger boy. “Report,” he instructed, like the boy were one of his soldiers.

He certainly reacted like one, his spine straightening and his chin lifting as he snapped his liquid gaze up to Madoc’s.

Jude didn’t blame him. The old redcap could have that effect.

“Prince Dain never returned to his quarters yesterday,” the imp said. “He was found by a librarian this evening in the royal lineage section, propped against the shelf and—” the imp paused, looking slightly sick, “and with his throat slit.”

“Any other injuries?” Madoc’s voice was cool and steady, as though he were asking about the weather, not the murder of a prince.

“I didn’t—I don’t know, sir. I didn’t see the body.”

At the general’s displeased grunt, the boy rushed to add, “But—at the time of my departure, they were just going to fetch a royal physician. They’ll have the report by now, I’m sure.”

“Hmph,” Madoc responded. “I’ll just have to go and find out for myself. Dismissed.”

As the imp bowed and turned to leave, Jude found herself blurting, “Wait!” the word coming out before she had a chance to think better of it.

The imp halted, glancing first at Madoc, who shrugged, and then at her.

“What about Prince Cardan?” she asked. “Has there been any news of him?”

The cat on her lap stirred slightly, his paws kneading into her legs at the mention of the disfavoured prince’s name.

“Not to my knowledge,” the boy said, shaking his head, and Jude felt her heart drop.

She nodded her thanks as the messenger bowed again and left, not trusting herself to speak through the tightening of her throat or the worry washing through her. For all he’d done to her, for all that he was her worst enemy, she never would have wished him dead.

Madoc’s commanding rumble broke through her fear. “Go and have the stablehands prepare me a mount,” he said. His eyes glared into hers as he repeated, “One mount.”

“I’m not—” Jude started, her fists clenching, but she swallowed her protest. There was no point in saying anything—he’d already made it clear that he wouldn’t allow her to come.

“Fine,” she said instead, and gathered her cat up as she left.

~ ~ ~

Jude did not go to the stables, but instead marched straight to her room, the heels of her boots clicking on the wooden floors. She caught a servant along the way to demand a mount be made ready for Madoc, and then set about preparing for her own trip to the palace.

As she strapped her sword belt to her waist and hid daggers under her sleeves, she kept glancing sidelong at the little cat pacing her floor. His tail lashed viciously with each step, his eyes bright. He must sense her own agitation.

“I’m sorry,” she told him. “I’m just worried. But I’m not staying home until Madoc brings word. For all I know, he’ll leave out all of the most important details to keep me from getting involved.” She scowled. “I’m not a child anymore. And I’m going to find out what happened to Cardan.”

The cat meowed and when she glanced over he met her eyes full on with his own amber bright glare. She could have sworn he’d sounded annoyed as she glared back at him, trying not to let her unnerve show. It wasn’t natural how human he seemed sometimes.

With a deep, steadying breath, she strapped the last sheath to her thigh and double checked the blade before sliding it into place.

She glanced at her cat again. “Are you coming?”

He mewed and clambered up her clothes, his claws pricking her skin.

“I swear you do that on purpose,” she grumbled as she checked out her window.

In the distance, Madoc was galloping astride a dark horse, almost at the edge of the Milkwood. By the time she had a mount saddled, he would be too far ahead to notice her.

With the cat slunk over her shoulders like a warm scarf, she made her way down to the stables and chose a light-footed creature reminiscent of a reindeer with glassy eyes and long fangs on either side of its mouth.

She made good time through the woods, her mount swift and smooth as it dodged trees and leapt fallen logs. The cat perched on the saddle before her, little face upturned in the wind, eyes slitted in pleasure, and Jude would have joined him had there not been a knot in her stomach at the possibility of Cardan being dead.

When the palace of Elfhame came into view, she pulled her mount to a stop and left it to graze out of view. Though it would have been quicker, coming careening up to the castle on the back of a fanged reindeer would be far from inconspicuous.

She continued on foot, the cat riding on her shoulders once again until they neared the base of the hill where the entrance was hidden by humming magic.

Two guards stood watch today, a precaution to keep unwanted visitors out after the news of Prince Dain’s murder. She had planned to enter quietly, but that may be impossible now.

As Jude drew closer, the guards moved in unison, drawing their weapons.

“What business do you have at the palace?" the taller of the two asked.

Jude lifted her chin and squared her shoulders. “I’m here with General Madoc,” she declared, to which the shorter guard snickered.

“Sure you are, mortal.”

The taller one shook her head. “The general specifically stated that he came alone.”

Jude fought the urge to clench her fists as the guards remained unmoving. “I need to see him,” she tried, “it’s important.”

“There’s nothing we can do about that,” the short guard drawled. “No one’s allowed in or out without explicit orders.”

The taller one shrugged apologetically. “Sorry. We can take a message, if you like.”

Jude shook her head, already turning away with a mumbled excuse, when her cat leapt off her shoulder and disappeared into the hill.

“Hey!” she called after him, moving to follow, but the guards stepped in front of her.

“You can’t go in.”

“But my cat—”

“You live in the general’s household?” the taller guard asked.

“Yes.”

“We’ll make sure the cat gets sent back with him if we see it again.”

She ground her teeth but nodded. “Fine. Guess I’m leaving then.”

“Guess you are,” the shorter guard challenged.

She fought the urge to say something smart back, or draw her sword on him, and instead walked around the hill.

“Where are you going now?” one of the guards called.

Nosy, she thought, but yelled back, “Visiting a friend,” and rounded the base of the hill until she was out of their view.

There had to be another way in, and so long as there was one, she would find it. She paced a half circle around the side of the hill opposite the guards, searching for another illusioned entrance or tunnel, a servants’ door—nothing.

Jude was just about to give up when she heard a triumphant, “Mrrrow!” from somewhere above. It was her cat, his little black head poking out an open window halfway up the hill.

“You genius little kitty!” she praised him, jogging up the sloping earth and climbing through the round window. As she eased the wood-bordered glass pane shut again, she whispered, “I didn’t even know these opened.”

The cat purred, looking decidedly smug, and Jude marvelled again at his strangeness.

“You don’t happen to know the way to the dungeons too, do you?” she asked, half jokingly.

He chirped and wound around her leg before trotting out of the room.

~ ~ ~

Jude entered the dungeons on quiet feet, trailing after the little black cat. The moment his paws touched the cold stone he yelped and leapt back onto her shoulders, his claws digging in.

“Spoiled rotten,” she accused him. “You have twice as many legs as me, you know. If anything you should be the one doing the carrying.”

She could have sworn he stuck his tongue out at her in response, or maybe it was just a coincidence, so she blew in his face.

The dungeon was mostly empty, with the few cells that were filled being deeper down. She supposed crimes weren’t oft committed in a land were a forceful promise was binding. Or, Jude thought as her eyes caught on an executioner’s sword mounted on the wall, maybe there was a darker reason.

She tried not to shiver in the damp air as she stalked past rows of cells, her eyes scanning the shadows for a pixie girl in a gown fit for a revel.

When at last she stopped before a small figure in a dirty gown, the cat sprung from her shoulders to stand, hissing and hackles raised, before the bars.

Behind the bars, the pixie sat up from where she was lounging on her straw palette, a laugh spilling from her lips, bitter and grating to Jude’s ears.

“Well, hello again,” the prisoner smirked, ruby red eyes flashing in the low light. “It looks like you came back to find me. You miss me that much?”

Jude tried to hide the confusion swirling inside her as she picked up her yowling cat. “We’ve never met,” she stated, to which the pixie laughed again.

“Not everything’s about you, love.” Her eyes locked on the cat as she jerked her chin at it. “Cat bring you here?”

Jude frowned. “Leave him out of it.”

“Alright, if you insist,” she shrugged. “So what do you want? Because as much as I’d like to think you came just to visit, I find it hard to believe you would appreciate my company so much—especially since we’ve never met.”

Jude shifted. She hadn’t thought about what she was going to actually say once she got here—ask nicely for the return of the prince? Grab the prisoner through the bars and shake her? Instead, Jude steeled herself and dove straight in, barrelling through both tact and diplomacy in one fell swoop.

“I have questions.”

“And what makes you think I have answers?”

“I already know you’re connected to Cardan’s disappearance,” she said, stepping closer, “and you’re going to tell me where he is.”

“Oh?” Red brows lifted over honey gold skin as the prisoner regarded Jude with some interest. “Am I now?”

“Yes, you are.” Jude ground the words out through gritted teeth, resisting the urge to lay her hand on her sword hilt as the pixie seemingly considered her options. Finally, she leaned back on her straw palette like it was the most comfortable bed in the world.

“No.” Her tone was flat, void of emotion, but there was a flicker of something—anger? Regret?—behind her eyes.

“I’m not asking,” Jude said, meeting the pixie’s glare.

“Oh, but I think you are. What else are you going to do? Threaten me? I’m already behind bars, darling, and you snuck in here. As soon as I called for a guard, you’d have to run, or risk being caught.”

Jude thought about bluffing or lying her way out of the trap, but curiosity got the better of her.

“How did you know I snuck in?”

“I didn’t, for sure, until just now,” the pixie responded, and Jude cursed herself for her stupidity. “I’d guessed it, because you have no uniform and no keys, and because no one ever enters from that direction.” She gestured down the hall where Jude had come from minutes prior. “And because the castle already came to see me today.”

At Jude’s frown, the girl elaborated with a roll of her eyes.

“They come down here every single day to ask me if I’m ready to tell them what I did with our dearest Prince Cardan, and every single day I tell them no, I’m not ready, I’m still literally unable to talk about anything I’ve done EVEN IF I WANTED TO, because I’m under a damn OATH!”

She threw her hands up in frustration before covering her face with her arms, huffing a sigh before continuing. “And then they walk away and tell me well then, no food until you’re ready to talk, and I always scream my worst insults at them as they leave, which I have to admit makes me feel just a teeny bit better.”

She sat up and met Jude’s eyes with a shrug. “I mean, it’s not nice of me, but I think I deserve it after all this.” She gestured to the mildew damp walls and bounced a bit on the creaky bed.

A pang of sympathy wormed its way into Jude’s heart, but she shut it out.

“How are you not dead?” she asked. “You have to have said something or you’d have starved by now.”

The girl laughed again. “Oh, but that’s the beauty of it! See, this cell is enchanted specially by High King Eldred himself.” Her eyes flashed and her smile faltered, so momentarily Jude could almost have been convinced it didn’t happen. Almost.

“Once you step inside, you can feel as hungry or as thirsty as you like, but you’ll never die from it. It’s a special kind of torture,” the pixie grimaced.

Jude swallowed the pity rising in her throat and lifted her chin. “Well, you probably deserved it. You’re a murderer afterall.”

“I—” the girl began to protest, but she stopped before she could say anymore. A moment passed before she coughed.

“Like I said, I can’t tell you anything about what I’ve done, but I can tell you that if I had been given a choice, I wouldn’t have gone after Cardan.”

“And Dain?”

“Dain?” the pixie echoed. “What about him?”

“They found him murdered this evening. Did you go after him?”

“What?” If the look of utter shock on the pixie’s face hadn’t convinced Jude, her next words did: “I didn’t kill Dain. You know I can’t lie, so you believe me, right? You know I’m telling the truth.”

Slowly, Jude nodded. “I believe you.”

“Listen: I can’t tell you what I did to Cardan, or why, or who I work for, but I can tell you this,” the pixie said, moving to stand by the bars.

“Desires sometimes take unexpected forms, but chasing them does no good when they’re already within your grasp. Cardan is closer than you think, but there is a power that will always hunger, and if you don’t stop it soon, it’ll devour not only your prince, but the rest of Faerie as well.”

Silence fell over the jail like a blanket, disturbed only by the drip, drip, drip of water.

Finally, the prisoner raised red brows. “So?”

“Thank you so much, that was so helpful and I now know everything,” Jude declared flatly.

The pixie girl sighed and propped her fists on the soiled waist of her gown. “You can be sarcastic all you want, babe, but I swear, that was as much as I can tell you—you know, binding oath and all? I mean, have you not been listening this entire conversation?”

The cat on her shoulder mewed and Jude glared at him sidelong.

“Whose side are you on?” she huffed, to which he meowed again and lashed his tail.

“Alright, fine.” Jude pressed her lips into a thin line as she turned back to face the girl in the cell. “I’ll figure it out myself.”

With the cat on her shoulder, Jude stalked out of the palace the same way she’d come in.

~ ~ ~

Cardan sat on the windowsill of Jude’s room, watching as the sun began to creep above the horizon, painting the sky in the golden light of dawn. Behind him, Jude was deep in slumber, snoring softly into her pillow, but with everything that had happened today, he couldn’t sleep.

Dain was gone and the palace was in shambles—he’d seen as much when he’d slipped inside. Guards had been everywhere, servants carrying cleaning supplies milled about, and curious courtiers had drifted through the halls, trying to catch a glimpse of what had happened.

When he’d passed by the library, Cardan had paused, resisting the urge to enter. When he breathed in, he’d nearly vomited.

Scents were much stronger to his cat nose, and through the must of old books and scrolls, beneath the scent of centuries of dust, he had smelled the cooling blood of his brother as it seeped into the carpets. It had taken all his willpower not to collapse in his sorrow.

The blankets rustled from inside the room and Jude’s groggy voice reached his ears.

“Kitty? What’re you doin’?”

He glanced at her over his shoulder and gave her a soft mrrm of amusement. Her hair was escaping its braid and dried drool had left a trail down her cheek.

“Come here, kitty,” she crooned, patting the blankets, and Cardan complied, slinking across the room to curl up in the curve of her arm.

Jude’s fingers played in the fluff around his neck and he couldn’t help but purr into the silence. He’d always been disgusted by how much he craved her touch, but he’d discovered of late that her fingers scratching his jaw or playing with his fur was one of his favourite things. He blamed Pellia’s cat curse.

They stayed that way for a long while, Jude stroking his fluff and his purrs warming the ever-lightening room.

When he twisted his face up to look at her, she brushed a kiss to his nose before settling into her pillows and pulling him closer. If cats could blush, he would have been bright pink.

“Sleep tight, kitty,” Jude whispered. “You’re safe here.”

And Cardan knew she was right.

***

A/N: Hello, loves! Thanks for reading and I hope you liked it!! I'm sorry this was a bit late, as I said earlier I struggled with this chapter so much. Thank you all so much for your support though, reading your lovely comments was a big motivation to get this chapter written, and I can say with absolute certainty that I would have given up long ago if it weren't for your kind feedback. I'm sending lots of love to all of you!

(PS: Please let me know if you’d like to be added to or removed from my tag list!)

Tagging: @stardustsroses @nahthanks @jurdanhell @my-one-true-l @thefolkofthefic @greenbriarxrose @bookavert @queen-of-demons-and-hell @theviolettulip @lysandra-ghost-leopard @playlistmusings @localgoof @garnet-babe @iamaprincessallgirlsare

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izzabeean · 3 years

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Chapter 11 : Apprehensive

SUMMARY

You never thought it would be this hard to open up.

pairing : ushjima x f!reader / oikawa x f!reader / iwaizumi x f!reader

genre : angst + fluff

word count : 2,376

content : profanity

tags : alternate universe - college/university, post-break up, friends to lovers, pining, slow burn

a/n : Hello! Apologies for this late post. Everything has been a bit hectic lately and I’m struggling to keep up with work and my free time. I have started to slack a bit on my writing. It’s a bit on the shorter side but here is the next chapter!

Because I’m new to this and have bit more off than I can chew, I’ve noticed some timeline errors when writing this chapter. I couldn’t just let it go and had to go back to correct them.

For those who do not wish to re-read chapter 8 (I understand, it’s a hefty one), please note that at the beginning of the chapter, Y/N and Iwaizumi have a heart-to-heart. Originally it jumps to the same day, but that is an error on my part. The rest of the chapter actually takes place later in the week. So Y/N has spent almost a week at Oikawa’s apartment.

I appreciate you all for tagging along for this ride. I definitely have been aching to write about Hanamaki or Matsukawa, but will once this series has been completed! Thanks so much xx

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Walking into the empty corridor, you blink at the torn-up flooring exposing the bones of the apartment while noticing dust in the air from the sunlight trickling in through the living room window. Living here for almost four years gave you the alone time you needed. But now it felt foreign. The familiar serene getaway from the pressure of your parents breathing down your neck was now emanating dark energy. A place once full of bright memories seems to turn into the last place you wish to be.

“What is?” Iwaizumi exclaims, following behind you.

“It’s just weird,” you murmur, smiling up at Iwaizumi. “I haven’t seen it this empty since I moved in.”

That day didn’t feel too long ago.

As cliche as it sounds, it almost did feel like yesterday. Getting settled into the new space, unsure what to do with yourself in the silence of the apartment. But it wasn't long before you made friends with Oikawa who would come over to study together. He'd always bring snacks from your favorite dessert place and sometimes, if you could convince him, he would stay over to watch your favorite series. Yes, he would complain that he hated it, that it was slow, uninteresting and he's seen better. Then he would shut up and watch knowing that you enjoyed his company in the lonely apartment.

Your gaze shifts to the bedroom doorway. The last night you spent there, it was with Oikawa, but before that, it was always Ushijima. Not every single night, but when he did, you felt safe pressed up against his broad frame under the covers. Thinking about it now, it makes you regret that you didn't indulge in it more back then.

When you started seeing Ushijima, he became the priority. He would come over for study dates and you'd never have to ask twice to persuade him to watch television series or movies with you. Truthfully, you miss those days. Everything was so simple and new. It felt like a breath of fresh air that you were aching to find.

Yet here you are now just remembering what you wish to forget.

“Are you sure you don’t want to just move in with me?” Oikawa sniggers, analyzing the janky water-damaged walls that look like they could disintegrate at any moment.

"What? You finally have the balls to say this place isn’t good enough for you?" you mock, raising an eyebrow at him waiting for his answer.

"No, it's just…” he pauses before continuing, half-heartedly afraid he will offend you. “Old."

You roll your eyes. Yeah it's older than any twenty-something-year-old would want to live in, but you didn't care because of the location to the university and honestly, in your eyes, the apartment is quaint and homey.

“You always have something to say. Don't you, Shittykawa,” Iwaizumi fumes, eyes sending daggers in Oikawa’s direction.

You couldn't help but let out a snicker that catches Iwaizumi's attention, shooting you a little smile. The natural draw your body has towards Iwaizumi is intoxicating. Your entire mind turns to putty when he looks at you like all your worries will just disappear upon his gaze. Maybe that's why you unconsciously kiss him the other night.

You don't want him to leave. You want him to stay. But how can you say that when you haven't known him for very long. The Iwaizumi now is so much different from the Iwaizumi in elementary school. Yet you wanted to get to know this person standing in front of you so much more and the limited time made your heartache all over again.

"Are you excited to move back in?" Iwaizumi asks, his eyes still locked on you.

“Yeah,” you utter, the sound of your heartbeat feels louder than your words. “I can’t wait to settle back in. I miss--”

Ding!

The sound reverberates from Iwaizumi's pocket.

“Shit, one second,” he exclaims, voice emitting a hint of embarrassment as he takes out his phone to read the text message he just received. “Fuck, I totally forgot. I'm supposed to meet up with some friends.”

“Oh,” you stammer. The words are laced with disappointment, but you remember you don't have Iwaizumi all to yourself. No, he isn't yours, unfortunately. And with that, you quickly switch forcing a smile to hide the gutted feeling encompassing your body. "It's fine!"

“I’m so sorry, I’ll catch up later. Just text me if you guys end up going somewhere else,” he calls out before rushing out the door.

The sound of the door shutting cues a rush of anguish flooding your chest as you wonder where he’s gone off to in such a hurry. He did say friends, but friends could mean anything including a girl.

Oikawa continues to walk around the apartment and you feel your face pale as you wonder what he's thinking if he knows who Iwaizumi's friends are.

Stop. You couldn't let yourself spiral into those thoughts. It wasn't like you to think this way, but you can't help yourself when you fear the same disappointment that surges you on the day you saw Ushijima and Sara together.

Fuck. At least insurance is giving you a bit of a break with the repair costs.

“Landlord says another week until repairs are done," you finally say, breaking the silence. "Then I can start moving my stuff back in.”

“Maybe don’t celebrate just yet, knowing your luck.” Oikawa taunts.

“Oh, is it because you’re going to miss me?” you scoff, attempting to make him squirm, but he plays right into your hands without hesitation.

“Yeah right, thought you said you were sick of me," he japes, taking a swing at the words that practically stung before.

“I guess you could say that...” you breathe.

Your words taste bitter with a drop of guilt as they leave your tongue. Perhaps you felt you owed a lot to Oikawa for basically saving your ass.

With the apartment.

With Ushijima.

You look at the bandage on his face and your eyes trail down to his bruised knuckles. Perhaps you wanted to do more than just buying him his favorite drink. Yet, you didn't even know where to start or what he would want to make things even.

“I-- I’m just joking, just to clarify. Of course, I’m not sick of you,” you sigh, reverting eye contact as you muster up the courage to express your thoughts. “I’m very happy to have you.”

I don’t know what I’m saying, you think while peering at the confusion spread on Oikawa's face. You don't normally open up to him about this kind of stuff and you feel your body burning under his gaze.

“Sorry this is a bit weird,” you exclaim as the nerves take over and you bite your tongue before you say anything else.

“No, no, I’m interested now,” Oikawa purrs.

“Well, maybe now I don’t want to tell you!”

"Of course you do," he persuades slyly grinning.

Normally the gesture makes you recoil as you witness his flirtatious nature that you've never succumbed to because that's just how Oikawa Tōru was. But instead, it just pushes the words out.

"Th-- thank you,” you say unable to even look up at him. “For everything. You’ve really been there for me when no one else has.”

At first, you think he's going to laugh in your face. In fact, you expected it so, but when you trail your eyes back to meet his, he sends you a small smile.

“That’s what friends are for, right?” Oikawa comforts.

With a deep breath, you stare into his chocolate brown eyes, drinking in his gaze and he’s giving you that look. It’s the same look he gave you last night when you were patching up his wounds. And it makes your heartthrob.

“You’re really something Tōru. No wonder all the girls fall for you,” you tease, in an attempt to push away the flush of embarrassment from his words.

“I wouldn’t say all,” Oikawa chuckles.

His voice is low and sultry, and you wonder what he means by that as contentment warmed you from within.

The exchange lingers but you clear your throat and turn away to walk around the apartment. The gesture causes Oikawa to shift his weight from side to side looking at your figure in the small space.

“I think I’ve seen more than enough,” you exhale taking one last glance out the living room window. “Shall we head out?”

“Sure.”

Oikawa walks down the short hallway, while you take a moment longer to soak up your apartment.

“See you soon,” you whisper before turning your back to leave.

Just as you close the door behind you to lock up, you hit your back into Oikawa’s frame who is standing firmly behind you.

“What’s wrong?” you ask, then peak behind his body to see Ushijima standing at the end of the hallway.“Wa-Wakkun… What are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to you,” he demands.

Although you can't get a good look at him in detail, you can see his face is bandaged up from Oikawa’s punch.

“I don’t--”

“And you think I’m going to let that happen?” Oikawa rages, placing his body in between you and Ushijima.

“Tōru, it’s okay,” you reiterate, touching his shoulder lightly to reassure it's not worth his energy.

“Or did you not understand anything from last night?” Oikawa continues ignoring your words and shaking your hand off his shoulder.

“Maybe we should ask Y/N instead of you making decisions for her,” Ushijima booms, remaining calm.

“Tōru, come on,” you sneer, grabbing his arm to pull him along, but he wiggles your hand off once again.

“I know for a fact she doesn’t want to talk to you," he sputters, eyes narrowing on Ushijima.

But your patience hit its limit. This time your anger couldn't be pushed down as your blood starts to boil. And you unleashed it in front of Oikawa, stepping in front of him shooting him a furious glare.

“Are you going to fucking listen or not?”

Your voice snaps him to his senses seeing your eyes glossed over but filled with rage.

“You don’t speak for me,” you thundered. “Let’s go.”

You grab his hand and yank him forward, walking by Ushijima ignoring him.

“Y/N, please,” Ushijima pleads.

Yet you don't turn back. You can't. It isn't in your best interest to talk it out or hear his point of view. This isn't something that can be fixed with words. He hurt you and you could not surrender what is left of your dignity. You had to move on, in your own way just as he's doing.

“Don’t fucking do that again,” you bark as you continue to drag Oikawa behind holding his hand tightly.

“That guy is basically stalking you,” Oikawa argues trying to keep up with your frantic strides.

“So what? I can handle it myself.”

“I was just trying to help--”

“And look what happened last time!”

Your legs come to a stop and you swallow thickly. Your voice erupts as your heart sinks at the realization of how angry and guilty you feel, of how mad you are at yourself for letting Oikawa get in the middle of your issues with Ushijima. The familiar sense of dread returns and the look from Oikawa’s shocked wide eyes make you regret your outburst.

“You got hurt because of me,” you manage to breathe, slowly sliding your hand out of his.

But before you let go, he grabs it tight then pulls you in close, your face enveloped into his chest and his chin resting on the top of your head. The sensation offsets your frustration and anger, you hadn't known it, but once you received the warm and comforting embrace you realize it’s what you really needed all this time.

“If we left at the beginning of the night, you would’ve been fine,” you gasp, trying to get the words out, but your voice breaks a little. Your chest feels tight like your heart is going to burst any moment now as it continues to descend deeper and deeper into dread.

Oikawa doesn’t say a word, afraid that he’ll ruin the moment if he does. His worry grows as he takes a deep breath in expecting you to smell like nicotine or ting of smoke, from the secret you have been keeping from him. But you have this indescribable scent that draws him in closer heating up his entire body as he presses yours into his. Not wanting to let go.

“But because I had to prove a point, we stayed,” you continue, and feel tears beginning to form, blurring your vision. “I’m the one at fault here.”

"No Y/N," Oikawa says trying to soothe you. He thinks he can forget the throbbing pain in his chest as he looks at you undone before him. "You didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry for involving myself."

"It's okay," you say taking a sharp breath. He smells so good and his hug is doing wonders for your mental health but you pull away worried that you've overstayed your welcome.

“Why do you hate him so much anyway?” you sniffle, wiping the tears with your sleeve.

“Mmm don’t know…” he murmurs.“I just don’t like him.”

You frown at his reply. Does he really not have an actual explanation?

“Well that’s stupid,” you breathe, unsure if you actually believe it. “Did he steal a girl from you or something?”

“No!” he responds, quicker than he wishes he did. He remembers when you first mentioned Ushijima’s name, there was a sparkle in your eyes he’s never seen before. At that moment, he promised himself to not get in the way and remain neutral, but Oikawa was much pettier than that.

“Who was it?” you snort, only half sure he’ll actually tell you.

“No one,” he chuckles. “We don’t have the same type anyway.”

“Why? I’m not your type?”

Your voice is soft and innocent as he pauses to analyze whether you are being serious or not.

“Kidding! Obviously,” you snarl.

By now, there’s this ease of tension between the two of you as you lapse into silence. Nothing more needed to be said.

#haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu fluff #oikawa x reader #oikawa x y/n #ushijima x reader #ushijima x y/n #iwaizumi x reader

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cousinwingding97 · 3 years

Text

Silver Memories

Chapter Five: Corvus

Warnings: Description of killing someone. This one is a long one as well, so the next chapter will be shorter since this took a lot out of my brain. Enjoy!

Mando listens as you describe the nightmare, or possible vision for lack of a better word, with rapt attention. Every detail is seared into your brain much like the memory of being whipped that keeps playing over and over; this one feels different, though, like an out of reach dream rather than a bone deep memory. You don’t know which is worse and you wouldn’t mind some happy memories to play in the darkness of your mind while drifting to sleep.

He shrugs it off saying it’s just a nightmare or memory before turning back to the flashing lights of hyperspace. You want to argue considering the details seem more recent and there was no sign of pain and destruction while you two were on Pollis Massa, but he cuts you off with a, “We’ll find out from my friend what it is. For now, try not to let it bother you.”

Yes, brilliant idea. Can’t believe I didn’t think about not letting it bother me, you think to yourself. Even with his words, you can’t help but notice that Mando seems much more tense in the shoulders. You’re wondering if he is just trying to make you feel better in his own way.

“Do I have enemies?”

“W-what? Why do you ask?”

“Well, I mean the dream made it seem like that guy wants to kill me or capture me at least, I was found in a cell; I can’t help but feel like people don’t want me around.”

“Everyone has enemies. Yours probably grew in number just from hanging out with me.”

“Why? Do people not like you?”

Mando lets out a small sound like a disbelieving laugh, “Most people aren’t too excited about a bounty hunter sullying their place of business In case we end up causing a mess or chasing after them. I’m not welcome to most places.”

Something twists in your heart. It feels like pity or just discomfort with the idea of people judging based off the armor and job Mando performs. “Don’t you get lonely?”

Mando shifts in his seat, “I’ve never really thought about it,” he says, but you can’t help but feel a wave of sadness wash over you. A desire to fit in and be loved, but only ever being held at arms length or feared. The emotions don’t feel like your own; in fact, you know they aren’t since you can’t place any experience to that feeling. It feels more like Mando’s due to the tinge of anger underneath it all. Why wouldn’t a child be loved unconditionally and why should anyone be untouched by the love and kindness of others?

“You have,” you breathe out more to yourself. The realization hitting you like a punch to the gut, slamming all of your emotions out to be filled with his. “You’re lonely. No one gave you what you really wanted.”

You can almost see the faceless warriors demanding excellence, violence, pure fight from every child instead of the love a child needs. A desire for every child to perform perfectly without any thought or care towards what actually children need to develop and thrive. It hurts. You don’t know why, but your heart feels like there are claws hollowing it out from the inside. Your breath starts to burn in your lungs.

“Stop it.”

“You just want the gentleness and love, you want to be loved, yet you can’t have it now.” The words flow out of your mouth, unwelcome.

“I said stop.”

“Everyone is too scared of you. Mandalorians are warriors first. Nothing else.”

“Snap out of it!” Mando literally snaps his fingers in front of your eyes and just like that, the spell is broken. You can breathe again and once you can, all you feel is numb, as if all of Mando’s emotions took your own, leaving you with nothing. Your eyes focus on Mando again. He’s staring at you. The T Visor reflects the stars of hyperspace making it look like there’s a mini galaxy in his visor instead of the black void you had grown used to. You know he’s angry by his tone and the stiffness of his body language, but you aren’t scared of him now. He won’t hurt you because he’s not angry at you, just exposed from your earlier invasion into his mind. His walls are up even higher now, you can’t help but feel like you’ve backtracked in his trust of you.

“Sorry, I just... felt you. I couldn’t stop it. I didn’t mean to invade your privacy.”

He tilts his helmet subtly. Something has changed between you two and he senses it now. Less fear and mistrust on your side and more on his side now with more questions for each of you.

“The sooner we find my friend, the better. Maybe she can help you control whatever this is.”

The rest of the flight is spent in awkward silence.

———————————————————————

Corvus looked absolutely dreadful from the viewport of the Vanguard. A foggy, barren dead planet. Dead trees, fog that clouded everything like a cloak of death. Your mood was already sour from the flight with your emotions plus Mando’s silent brooding now adding to the ever growing list of negative emotions about the current state of affairs. You absolutely hated everything about this place already. The dark gloom ate into your soul.

Mando was quiet as ever. The rest of the flight he remained silent and didn’t even look at you. You figured it was probably the invasion of privacy, but you couldn’t help it. You couldn’t help any of this! He had a right to be angry, but it still pissed you off that he seemed to be taking it out on you when you couldn’t even control what was going on.

Only when the ramp lowered and you were standing on this new planet did he finally speak to you, “Last I saw, Ahsoka was this way.” He hadn’t even stopped walking to say that, so you had no choice except to follow. Begrudgingly, you did. Like I have a choice in which way.

As if this planet couldn’t get worse, there was a silence weighing heavily around you, broken only by animalistic grunts and growls every so often. You jumped each time, scouring the area for any threat. The thought of holding on to Mando’s arm entered your mind once or twice, but his lack of reactions gave you an ounce of courage. Even if he still didn’t speak to break the heavy spell of this planet.

“Are we in danger?” You whispered into the fog.

“No.” Was the short reply.

“Then why are you not speaking?”

“Because I don’t have anything to say.”

“Even back on the ship? We are about to see a friend of yours, I’m apparently able to feel emotions through unknown powers that may be growing, I have creepy visions or dreams and you have nothing to say?” You abandoned the whispering for full volume talking, but still keeping it from yelling just in case.

“Until we know more, there’s nothing I can say.”

“More like won’t.”

The Mandalorian turns to you with a sigh, “We’ve been over this once. I’m not going to trigger you if I can help it and there’s not much to say. I hate to say it, but I’m just clueless as you are and I’m taking a shot in the dark hoping that she can help us. I’m sorry, but this is the best I’ve got right now.”

It hits you like a laser shot. Mando doesn’t know and that terrifies you. This whole time you had been following his lead thinking he knew what to do in order to bring back your memories, but he’s just as lost as you. You had been blindly trusting this man to help you and he doesn’t even have the answers. Sure, he knows more about you than you do, but the visions and emotional tune-ins are new to him as well.

“Did I not have these abilities before?”

“I don’t know.”

Mando leads you through the dead forest. Over logs, around boulders and deeper into the fog. This planet may have flourished at one time, but it looked like a graveyard now to you. There were shapes in the distance of creatures, but the lack of light coming through the fog didn’t show much detail, letting your imagination draw up horrible images of what may lie beyond the fog.

“Why does your friend live on a creepy, haunted planet?”

“It’s not haunted, just damaged. When I met her, she was freeing the locals from a tyrant who tortured those within her walls.”

“Do you think she’s still here then?”

“Maybe. The locals should be able to tell us more. If not, we can at least stock up on supplies.” The idea of people living on this planet is a tad bit surprising to you.

After hours of walking, the forest seems to give way to a grey wall. There are people posted along it, and upon seeing the silver armor, there’s a sudden rush of noise and clamor. A gate housed in the middle of the wall opens revealing an elderly man making his way towards both of you.

“Mandalorian! Welcome back! Come in, come in! Night is falling. You can rest within our walls.”

Mando doesn’t say anything, but does reach up and clasp forearms with the man who now notices you. “Oh, miss! We hadn’t expected you to be back as well. Glad you both could join us.”

You immediately looked to Mando in surprise. You had been here with him too. You must’ve have met this friend while she was here. It made sense, but you were starting to wonder how long and for what reason you stuck around.

Mando kept walking without even noticing you. The village within the walls was lively. Houses lined the main street and bustling with activity. Vendors shouting their wares, children playing in the street and racing off down the winding streets veering off to the rest of the village. Even with the plain grey and brown neutral tones of the buildings, there was life within these walls that made you smile. It was a complete night and day difference compared to outside the walls.

People were happy here and happy to see you and Mando. Villagers would point at you two and wave. Some even clapped Mando on the back or hugged you. It was starting to overwhelm you. Did you know these people? Were you from here?

Mando noticed your growing concern and cut off the old man’s ramblings, “I’m sorry, but I need to find Ahsoka Tano. Is she here? My friend here lost her memories and needs her help.”

The old man looks to you in surprise and sorrow, “Oh, you should have said something earlier! My apologies, miss. Unfortunately, Ahsoka is not here at the moment. She’s taken up a new adventure outside of our walls. She said she would be back in a few days though.”

“And when was this?” You blurt out in despair.

“Two days ago. She will most likely be back very soon if you can wait.”

“Did she say where she was going? Maybe we can find her quicker.” Mando asks.

“No, I’m afraid not. To be honest, I can’t even say if she’s on this planet with absolute certainty.”

It takes all the strength in your body to hold your mouth shut to keep from screaming.

“You and your friend are more than welcome to stay with my family in the meantime, if you wish. After everything you did for us, it’s the least we can do in return.”

Mando accepts the offer for both of you. The man leaves to go tell his wife and family in order to prepare the house for you two. When he’s left, Mando turns to you.

“I’d rather not wait if we don’t have to. Are you alright staying here while I scout out the area and see if I can track her down myself?”

“Mando, I don’t know these people despite their knowing of me! Do you trust them? And what if this Ahsoka lady comes back and you’re not here?”

He holds a hand out as if to calm you, “I won’t leave tonight. That will give me time to see if these people are fully trustworthy and let you get comfortable with them. Is that better?”

You roll your eyes in annoyance. It was, but still not fully satisfying. “Again though, what if she shows up? I won’t know her. What if we miss her?”

Mando tilts his helmet in thought. His hands settle on the belt on his hips. As if the answer came to him from touching his belt, he suddenly reaches in a pouch and grabs something. Gingerly, he reaches out his fist to you. You lift your palm and he drops a black device into your hand. It’s small and round with an oval end and a piece that juts out from the bottom. There’s a blinking blue light on the oval end.

“Here. It’s a communicator that connects directly to my helmet. It may look small, but as long as it’s on and in your ear, it will connect to me. I’ll tell the old man to let everyone know that if Ahsoka shows up, to come to you. If she does, you just press the oval end and tell me. Does that help?”

You look at the device again and gently put it in your ear. The fit is perfect and light. You press the button to test it and Mando nods in confirmation that it worked.

“Okay. That’s fine. Just don’t be gone too long. If I have another episode, I’d rather it be by someone who is already used to my weirdness.”

If you hadn’t turned on the device to test it, you never would have heard the very small breath that passed through your ear. It was a laugh. A gentle huff, but a laugh that you could hear due to the connection to Mando’s helmet. You smiled fully in pride knowing you secretly made him laugh.

———————————————————————

The old man returned to find you and Mando shopping for new supplies. Both of your arms were full by the time he came back and showed you to his house that was within eyeshot of another gated larger house in the middle of the street. You didn’t get a good look at it, but you felt like that place held a lot of sorrow and pain within its walls.

The old man, whose name you learned was Ko, introduced you to his family. His wife, Leeda and their eldest son with his wife and a young grandson. They were extremely polite to you and Mando, catering to anything and everything. They took your bags and set them on the table by their laundry room and ushered you into the kitchen for dinner. The food smelled delicious, permeating the whole house with spice, meat and melted butter. You had no idea what it was, but sitting down to eat the seared meat and baked vegetables brought you to the most light-hearted you had felt since waking up. You ate with vigor and listened to the family speak of anything and everything.

The grandson brought up something you had forgotten until he piped up, “Mr. Mando, why aren’t you eating? Mom says that we have to eat if we are to stay strong!”

You had been distracted with the food and hadn’t even noticed the hunk of metal sitting next to you not saying a word or eating. His creed not even allowing a meal in the presence of others, but there he sat in silence, forgoing any part of impoliteness to even mention that he couldn’t eat. Everyone’s eyes were now on Mando as he sat in awkward silence. You set the silverware down in shame. How could you forget something like that? The poor guy hadn’t had food in who knew how long? He’d been with you this whole time.

“Jax, hush! That is impolite to ask of a Mandalorian.” His mother piped up.

“No, it’s okay. I ate recently. If I can, I’d like to take some to my room for later.” You knew it was a lie. He hadn’t had food recently. There was no way unless he had hidden tubes beneath that armor, but the family seemed to buy his lie.

You suddenly stood up announcing, “We are actually really tired from traveling so much and shopping, I am afraid we must retire. Can we see our rooms?”

Ko looks up startled, but laughs it off, “Oh yes! Of course! I should’ve known you two would be so tired. Come, come. I will show you to your room.”

You smile at him as he stands to show you to the rooms. You were just relieved that Mando would eat soon. He must have been starving! It was astonishing you that he was still standing without a hint of exhaustion or shaking.

Following Ko out of the dining room, you were led down the hall full of family photos, to a door at the end. One door. “Here’s where you two will be staying. I’m sure you will find it comfortable.” The two of you. He meant both of you. He meant for you to stay in the same room as Mando. Oh, please have two beds. You opened the door hesitantly and lo and behold, one large bed. It was so cliché you couldn’t help the small giggle that tickled out of your throat. Before you could protest, Mando chimed in that it was perfect and thanked Ko for his hospitality while gently pushing you further into the room to close the door.

You immediately went on the defense, “Why did you tell him this is fine! You need your privacy to eat! I can’t stay here.”

Mando had been holding up one hand while balancing the food in his other, preparing for a fight. He seemed to pause at your words. “You want to leave?”

“Yes! If it means you get to eat, then yes, I will leave or hide in the bathroom, whatever you need. I know you haven’t eaten for at least a day.”

He sets the food on one of the side tables next to the left side of the bed. He shuffles on his feet thinking about his next move. You move to leave thinking he was trying to come up with a nice way of telling you to get out. Before you can, “You can stay. If you want. Just as long as we sit on the floor facing the opposite way. Only if you’re comfortable, though.”

You can’t tell if it’s a plea or just him trying to make it seem like all of this is no big deal. You have no idea, you can’t really deny the fact that you want to stay. The idea of being out there with people who act like they know you makes you far more uncomfortable. “Alright.”

You cross the room to the right side of the room, pretending to notice all the details of the room instead of thinking about his heavy gaze. He watches you the whole time. You try not to fidget or trip over yourself in the midst of his watchful gaze. You turn your back to him and slide down the side of the bed until your legs are in front of you straight out and your butt hits the cold floor. You awkwardly give him a thumbs up over the side of the bed, “Anytime you’re ready.”

You hear a hiss and a clank of armor onto the wood table. You freeze. Your body immediately wanted to turn towards the noise. The curiosity alone makes you want to look. Maybe you had seen his face before all of this had happened and it would help trigger your memories. The thought leaves as soon as it enters. You weren’t about to betray his trust with something this monumental to him.

The quiet sounds of him sliding down to the floor and then starting to eat greet your ears. It’s so quiet and you can’t help but fill the tormenting silence with anything to distract yourself from what’s right across the room from you. It would be so easy to take a peek and the temptation leads you to studying everything around you. The room is large compared to the small compartments of Boba’s ship and the Vanguard, not large enough to distract you though. The view of the wall and its single picture of Ko’s family isn’t entertaining after a few seconds. The only window is right above the bed so you can’t look out of it without risking seeing Mando.

Boredom finally reaches its peak within your brain so you call out to the other side of the room, “How do they know me? They keep treating us like we are gods. What did we do?”

There was no way to prepare for the voice that greets your ears. You hadn’t thought about how Mando’s voice would sound and even if you had, it would never compare to reality. A warm rumble of whispered honey caresses your ears and slides down your body in a comforting bass, “This planet was under the control of the Empire. The ones that ripped your memories from you. We helped free them.”

“We?”

“Ahsoka, you and me.”

“How’d I do anything?”

There’s a pause for faint chewing. You felt kinda bad for insisting that he eat and then not letting him have that luxury by constantly asking questions.

“You think that trick you did to catch that little guy on the flying lizard was an accident? Luck? You helped a lot in that fight.”

As if hearing your next question forming, he interjected, “That’s all I will say. Why did you care so much about me eating?”

The change in topic throws you. All bubbling questions leave your mind as you try to focus on the answer.

“You still don’t seem to fully trust me, you haven’t shown any concern earlier, so why now?” He asks as if to clarify his question.

“I don’t know. I’m still struggling with it. These people act like decent people, the Empire must be the bad guys here for what they did to me and this town. I guess you are the closest thing I know to be good. You are trying to help me as far as I can tell, putting in more effort than Boba or anyone else so far, but here I am not offering any sort of help back. I get that I don’t know what I can and can’t do; however, that shouldn’t stop me from making sure my pilot is in fit condition. Maybe I hate your guts with my memories, maybe we were best friends. I’ll try to stay more in the moment and trust you until you prove otherwise, as long as you are more open with me about yourself. And not about your personal stuff, just tell me if you need rest or food, okay? It won’t ruin your scary image, I promise.”

He’s quiet as you hear him finish his food and set the plate back on the table. When you hear his voice again, it’s the blasted coder instead of sweet honey, much to your disappointment.

“Alright. Only if you do the same.”

You take that as permission to look at him again, so you stand and turn to him. His thighs are pressed to the bed as if trying to be close to you without crossing to your side of the room.

“We are pretty much on our own. I’m not used to counting on others, but you are too selfless and caring to be a burden. If I ask you something, I want you to be honest. I can’t help you if you end up passing out, having an episode, or worst of all: dying. I’ll do what I can to earn your trust.”

Your cheeks warm unwillingly. It sounded like Mando cared about you, so maybe you could trust him fully after all.

“Alright. Two-way street. Neither of us breaks these rules.”

“Fine. First question, is it alright if I sleep in here? Just as a precaution. I'll sleep in the chair, so you can have the bed."

The question catches you off guard. You honestly didn't know. The idea of him just watching you while you tried to sleep didn't sound like a lot of fun.

"Uh, are you actually going to sleep or just watch me the whole time?"

He seems to realize the way that sounded stutters a little, "I-no, uh, I meant, stay in here and sleep so I can be here in case something happens. Which it shouldn't, but just in case."

"As long as you promise to actually sleep. You need rest just like anyone else, you know that right? As far as I know, you aren't an android or anything. Are you a species that doesn't require a lot of sleep?"

He sighs and makes his way to the refresher off to the side of the bedroom, "Just get some rest."

Rectuantly, you lay down to get some sleep. The bed is cold from lack of use along with the night temperatures. You can hear water running as you lay there staring at the ceiling along with soft clanging as you imagine Mando removing his armor. You couldn't sleep with that kind of stuff going on. The mental image of what Mando might look like under the armor paired with that voice had your thoughts racing.

Once the door opens again, you catch a glimpse of Mando in just sleep clothes and his helmet before he turns off the light. It's a startling sight. Casual clothes and only his helmet? You never expected this. It was like seeing a rare creature out mythology in comparison to this. Almost intimate. You could see some tan skin barely peeking out of his tunic. He was still broad and large, yet more human. The skin looked human at least.

This was going to be a long night.

Sure enough, the next morning had left you waking up exhausted. Even knowing you were safe with Mando, the thought of a strange man at the foot of you bed still left you feeling restless, almost exposed. You had tossed and turned all night only catching bits and pieces of sleep every so often. When you awoke, Mando was already gone from the room. His weapons and armor were gone as well.

Leaving the room and entering the kitchen brought you back to a life outside of Mando and traveling with possible threats following you everywhere. Ko's family was already up and fixing breakfast together. The grandson, Jax, looked up to see you enter the kitchen. He grabbed your hand and dragged you over to help fix food with them. They were nice people that went to lengths to make you feel safe and at home with them.

You tried to make efforts to get to know them. It felt awkward with the almost hero worship they treated you with though. You had no idea how you had helped these people and if you even deserved it. What if Mando had just made it sound like you had helped so you wouldn't feel worthless?

They all had their own things to do after breakfast. Jax went to school, Ko's wife went out back to tend to her garden, and Jax’s parents, Lillian and Idris, went to visit another family. Ko at least invited you to drink tea on the back porch while watching his wife work in the garden. You gladly accepted.

"It is nice to have you and the Mandalorian back in our city. It's a good reminder that we are not easily forgotten. Mando did tell us you have been forced to forget everything, including yourself.”

You hum into your tea mug, noncommitedly, "Some Empire jerks took my memories. All of them. I don't remember ever being here."

"Well, I'm sure a part of it would be gladly forgotten. We were not a happy place until you and Mando came along. Ahsoka as well. Of course, it's not hard to expect from a Jedi. That is what they do."

"A Jedi?"

"Yes, the guardians of peace in the galaxy. You really have forgotten everything." His gaze of pity just makes your stomach turn. You didn't want pity. You didn't blame anyone but the people who did this to you.

"Is there anything you can tell me about myself? What was I like?"

Ko laughs in response, a genuine belly laugh, "You were a spit fire. You saw the injustice that was going on and you personally wanted to take on every guard and mercenary yourself. Mando had to hold you back. If it hadn't been for the need to find Ahsoka, you would've killed anyone in your way."

You couldn't help your eyes bulging our of your head. You? Killing people? Fighting in general? It was a crazy idea. You wanted to think this old man was crazy, but there was plenty of lucidity in the old man's eyes. He was telling the truth.

"What did I do? How'd I fight?"

"In any and every way. You didn't hold any punches. You used anything within your range. Blasters, staffs, even your fists. You were a sight to behold. You were kind to everyone in the city that was being held hostage here. You did whatever it took to free us. We are extremely grateful. We will do what we can to help you."

Once you had finished your tea, you left Ko to his own devices in order for you to think over everything he told you. You retreated to the solitude of the room you were sharing with Mando to rummage through the thoughts flying through your brain. The fear of accidentally triggering another violent memory had you curled up on the bed. Nothing happened though. You had taken a hot shower to calm down and changed into the clean clothes Leeda provided, yet now here you were with the spear you had stolen from Utapau. Mando had let you keep that at least. You were holding it trying to see if it felt familiar in your hands like a hidden instinct or muscle memory. Nothing was coming to you though.

You waited until night to check in with Mando. Perhaps a tad bit reluctantly, but you did worry about him being out there by himself.

"Mando, you there?"

The crackle in the communicator filled your ear and then his voice filled your head, "I'm here. Is everything okay?"

"That's what I was going to ask. Everything's fine. Just a little boring. It's almost strange to be living a quiet life after the past few days."

He chuckles lightly into the communicator, "I'm sure we will be on our way into trouble eventually. It's typical for me."

You smile tightly. You could wait on the trouble. "Any sign of Ahsoka?"

The answering sigh tells you enough, but still he answers, "None yet. I'm just trying to pick up any sort of trail. I'm found her camp from last time I met her and it looks abandoned. The only clue I found so far. It looks like she dismantled her camp fairly recently so that’s a sign she’s been here at least.”

"Hopefully she's okay and this isn't a wild bantha chase."

"I'm sure she is. She's a powerful warrior."

"Yeah, Ko said she's a Jedi. Apparently that means she's some sort of warrior."

"What else has Ko been telling you?"

"Just that apparently I know how to fight expertly as well." Your tone turns accusatory.

"Yes, you do. Don't ask though, I don't know where you learned or even all the things you can do."

Your pettiness still gets to you a little as wish him a quick goodnight and cut the line. It still frustrated the amount of information everyone knew. You really needed to stop taking it out on Mando. You felt a little guilty as you went to bed that night.

------------------------------------------------------

The next morning brought your regrets to the surface again as you awoke to a sudden boom and shaking of the house. Screams followed the explosion as the reverberations faded away. You practically fell out of bed running towards the door to find where you hoped the others would be.

You call out for Ko and the others but there’s no response. You look throughout the house and finally find them all gathered by a door offset from the kitchen. Ko had gathered his family and was leading them down through the door down a set of steps leading to what you assumed was a basement when you cried out to them, "What's going on? What was that sound?"

Ko turns to you and grabs your arm leading you to the basement, "The Empire is back. It's a small party, but they are bombing the city!"

Your heart freezes. Is this because of your vision? Is this all happening because of you? Guilt flares in your heart. If you caused all of this pain and suffering, kriff, probably some deaths, all because of your presence, you didn’t know how you would forgive yourself. You reach up to the communicator in your ear only to find it missing. In your confusion and haste to find the others you had left it behind in the bedroom. You left it on the table like a mindless wamp rat.

You turn to run back to the bedroom all the while Ko tries to yell at you to come back to the safety of the basement. You hear more explosions outside, but you have to let Mando know. The basement won’t be safe for long if the house falls down around them. Mando may not be able to do much, but you have to warn him so he won't walk into a trap and possibly find Ko and his trapped family should the worst happen.

You reach your room and pratically fling yourself onto the table to grab the communicator. Stuffing it into your ear, you immediately open the channel. "Mando!"

"What's wrong? Are you alright?"

"The Empire's here!"

#din djarin x female reader #din djarin #pedro pascal #pedro pascal owns my heart #mando #bounty hunter #star wars #the mandalorian #fanfic #im a simp #mandalorian x you #the mandalorian fanfiction #mandalorian x reader #mando x you #din x reader #din djarin x reader #corvus #fanfiction

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trashboatprince · 4 years

Text

I saw a challenge to write something sexy about Mr. Harrison and Mr. Cortese from this post by @naniiebimworks and I’m not missing the chance to make content of them in written form. Love me some Crowley and Aziraphale’s personas.

Summery: Warlock is too old for his nanny, but he’s not too old to start having a private tutor. Make that two tutors, who happen to look a bit like the nanny and the gardener who followed her off the grounds.

And already there’s something going on between them.

AKA Crowley and Aziraphale are really into how the other looks for this next phase of the plans.

Warning: these two are already in a relationship. Not full on content, but there is touching and such, gotta keep it pg-13 cause some of my followers are young. Also, not beta’d, so forgive the grammar errors

EDIT: There’s an extra mature chapter on ao3

On with the fic!

Nanny Ashtoreth put in her two weeks without much of a fuss, politely telling the Dowlings that young Warlock had no need for her anymore, it was time for him to get his lessons from a professional and not a nanny who was smarter than expected.

She recommended someone she said she had worked with previously, that he was highly recommended.

The day after she departed from the estate, there was a knock at the door and a tall, sharp man in an even sharper, dark suit stood there, carrying a briefcase under his arm. “I’m Mr. Harrison,” he greeted the doorman with a voice that dared him to say something, “Nanny Ashtoreth told me that this is where I would I be teaching.”

Without waiting, he stepped past the doorman and into the foyer, where he greeted Mrs. Dowling, who stepped down the stairs to greet him.

Mr. Harrison reminded her greatly of Nanny, that they looked rather similar. The same red colored hair, same facial structure, though clearly Harrison his sharp cheek bones under a beard.

“We’re cousins.” He told her simply, as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

He would start his lessons with Warlock tomorrow at nine.

The next morning, while Mr. Harrison was teaching Warlock his first lessons on the ancient armies of the world, there was yet another knock at the door.

The doorman was surprised to see a man with wild, near-white hair and an equally wild beard standing there, smiling. He was dressed in creams and golds, a stark contrast to the clothing of the other man who had been at the door the day before. “Good morning!” He greeted the poor employee with a Welsh tint to his voice. “I am Mr. Cortese, I was hired to be the private tutor to Warlock Dowling.”

“Uhh…” The doorman blinked, before making himself professional. “I am so sorry to inform you that Mrs. Dowling has already hired a tutor yesterday.”

“Oh?” Mr. Cortese asked, eyebrows raised high as he glanced about past the man, as if looking for the person who took his job. “I am sure that the young boy wouldn’t mind two instructors.”

The man at the door sighed and said he would get his boss to speak to the stranger. Ten minutes later, Mrs. Dowling hired Mr. Cortese to be Warlock’s second tutor, taking two days of the week and sharing one with his coworker.

She took note that he reminded her of someone, but she wasn’t sure. Sort of like the weird gardener who happened to leave right after Nanny Ashtoreth did, but house staff come and go.

“… And that, young Warlock, is why one must not draw on his books, you never know what their worth will be in the future.” Cortese sighed loudly as he finished with erasing the last of the doodles the young boy had drawn on the open pages of the history book in front of him.

“I thought it made it look cool.” Warlock replied in his defense and Cortese nearly rolled his eyes before removing his pocket watch from his vest pocket, looking at the time.

“Right, well, it seems that our lesson for history is over for today. Off you go, enjoy your hour break. When you return, we shall begin our coverage of literature.” He waved a hand towards the door and Warlock didn’t need to be told twice to run off for fun, there was a video game with his name on it that he couldn’t keep waiting any longer.

Cortese watched him run out of the room with a small huff, smiling as he started to clean up the books and papers on the table of the building’s library where he was to do his lessons. He paused when he smelled something, a strong cologne that covered a natural, demonic musk that he knew all too well. “Mr. Harrison, I assume?” He turned to meet the man who he had yet to be introduced to since arriving yesterday.

Leaning against a bookcase, Cortese stared from behind his reading glasses, feeling his face heat up just a bit as he looked at his counterpart.

Harrison was in a dark suit, fitting of him, opened jacket and tie just a bit loose. The angel inwardly cursed as he looked at how the other had styled his hair, pulled back in a tight short ponytail. He hadn’t seen Crowley since they left the estate, wanting to get themselves ready for their next personas.

Seems that Crowley miracled up a beard that looked too good on him, the littlest of changes to the demon always got something stirring in Aziraphale, be it a new haircut or the addition of facial hair.

And he did a combo, damn him.

Clearing his throat, Cortese straightened himself up, adjusting his jacket. “I almost didn’t get the job because of you.” He told the redhead, who only smirked, crossing his arms.

“You’d have gotten it anyway, and look, you did! Come on, you knew I was gonna show up first, made it less… suspicious, if we both showed up at the same time.” Pushing himself off of the bookshelf, Harrison sauntered over to partner in this scheme, the smirk turning more playful as he stepped around Cortese, looking him up and down behind dark lenses.

He stopped behind the shorter man, who froze up at the eyes that he felt on his backside, those hungry eyes…

“Nice suit,” Harrison commented, “suits you, love the colors. Golds and creams? A change of pace from the tartan.”

“Oh!” Cortese turned sharply, giving him a hard stare. “Must I repeat myself? Tartan is stylish! But, if you must know, I decided to change it up a bit. I do wear other clothing you know, Mr. Harrison.”

Harrison looked at him, before shrugging. “Of course, just… can’t help admirin’ how good you look when you mix it up a bit.” He was suddenly closer, when had he gotten so close? Cortese stepped back, feeling his backside bump against the table, he was pinned.

“You need to dress up more, angel.” Harrison then frowned before chuckling. “No, don’t do that, you become too much of a tease when you step out of the norm.” He toyed with the silk tie that Cortese wore, slowly, carefully loosening it as he tugged down on the knot with one finger.

Cortese’s face flared up red as a heat pooled in his stomach. “M-Mr. Harrison! You wily man, behave yourself!” He swatted at the hand. “You should be professional!”

“Oh please,” The demon rolled his eyes before leaning in closer, “it’s not like we didn’t have our fun as the nanny and the gardener, yeah? Won’t take these fools long to start rumors about us as well…”

Cortese paused, looking at Harrison’s face. Right, they had been a bit adventurous and frisky with one another when in their previous personas, what’s the harm of having a little fun as two tutors? It was like something out of his romance section, but he wouldn’t voice that out loud.

“We waited a few months as Ashtoreth and Francis before we got handy, my dear.” He finally replied and Harrison groaned.

“Wow, way to be a real buzzkill, angel!” He moved to step back, but Harrison found himself in place, hands on his hips that suddenly were pressed against Cortese’s. “Whu-?”

“Who said we weren’t going to have any fun?” The blond scoffed. “Besides…” There was a snap of fingers and Harrison heard a lock set in place.

Cortese leaned in close to his ear, he could practically hear the smug smile in the other’s voice. “We have less than an hour before my next lesson and I’d like to get my ‘coworker’ a bit better. Is that alright with you?”

The string of sounds from Harrison was all Cortese needed as an answer.

Someone, Harrison found himself flipped around, his own back pressed into the table with the angel pinning him to it, kissing him hard on the lips. Any coherent thoughts in the redhead’s mind were thrown out the window as he was snogged into next week, wrapping his legs around soft hips.

He pulled back, panting a bit as he looked at the hazel eyes that stared right at him. “Damn, angel, you’re in a mood.”

“You’re a terrible tease, dressing up like this.” Cortese huffed, kissing at his neck before working on undoing the already-loose knot of Harrison’s tie. “You know I love seeing you dressed up.”

“Mmm… sssshould do it more often than…” Harrison tilted his head back, lifting his hand up to snap his fingers, but a hand stopped him. “Come on, don’t go slow…” He groaned.

“No, I want to take it slow, I’m not going to just have your clothes vanish on me!” Cortese scoffed as he pulled back to start working on removing the suit jacket, taking note that he rather liked the pattern on it, Crowley needed to wear more patterns in his wardrobe.

Harrison pouted before his own fingers got to work on unbuttoning the vest Cortese wore, legs still firmly in place around the other’s waist. “How far?”

“Hmm… heavy petting?”

There was a loud snort. “Who taught you that?!” Harrison laughed before undoing the last button. He looked at the other man, a coy smile on his face. “Lovin’ the changes, angel. You look so good with that hair, almost feral, very you.”

“What on Earth are you talking about?”

“Just commentin’.” Harrison mumbled as he pulled him down, talking against the other’s lips before kissing him hard. Cortese mumbled a reply that fell on deaf ears, the two clearly distracted be kissing and the sneaky fingers playing with the tie the other wore.

Both were discarded on the table, and Harrison was vaguely aware that his hair had slipped from the ponytail it had been in. He would have made a comment, but he was distracted by perfectly manicured fingers playing with his freed hair, and by the body that pressed against him.

His own fingers busied themselves with groping a rather nice, soft bottom, earning a squeak from the angel who was still toying with his hair. Harrison smirked, pressing down on the ample flesh, keeping Cortese against him as he moved to suck on the exposed skin of his advisory’s neck.

The room felt hot and both angel and demon were feeling even hotter, fingers moving here and there, but never to what was going to be wanting some attention. Well, Harrison thought, time to change that-

There was a sharp set of knocks at the doors to the library and Cortese pulled back sharply from Harrison, losing his balance and dropping to the floor at the sudden intrusion.

“Ssshit!” Harrison sat up straight and worked quickly to straighten out his shirt, trying to button it back up from where Cortese had popped a few of the buttons.

“Y-yes? Who’s there?” Cortese called out.

“Mr. Cortese,” came Warlock’s voice from the other side, “can I come in?”

“In a moment!” The blond replied before trying to get his vest and shirt back in order. “Oh, this was a bad idea…!” He whispered towards the other man in the room, who was trying to get his hair back into place.

“Yeah, yeah, I know! Gotta wait until the kid’s asleep, ‘r somethin’…” Harrison jumped from the table, throwing on his coat, then grabbing a tie, tossing the other at Cortese who was quick to try and get it done up.

Once Harrison thought he had everything in order, he rushed to the door, the lock suddenly undone and the door opened to reveal Warlock, standing there with a confusion on his face. “We’ll continue our discussion of the plans later, yes, Mr. Cortese?” He spoke, as if nothing had just happened, outside of the flushed look on his cheeks and the rumpled state of his clothes.

“Y-yes, of course, do come looking for me when you have the chance, Mr. Harrison.” Cortese replied, swallowing as he straightened his jacket out. He watched the other man walk past Warlock without much word and turned to the child. “Yes, did you need something?” He asked, trying to act like Warlock did not just interrupt something.

“Wonderin’ if I left my phone in here.” Warlock replied before tilting his head. “How come you’re wearin’ Mr. Harrison’s tie?”

Cortese looked down, seeing that, yes, he was wearing the dark colored tie.

This was gonna be a long next couple of years.

END

They make up for lost time later, but make sure that it’s when no one will bother them. >.>

Anyway, first time every writing for Harrison and Cortese that wasn’t them as the Radio Omens boys, it was fun.

#good omens #ineffable husbands #anthony j crowley #aziraphale #mr harrison #mr cortese #john's drabbles

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hotpinkhoshi · 4 years

Text

kiss it better | one

pairing: mark tuan x reader

genre: angst, smut, brother’s best friend au (sort of)

warnings: age gap (nine years), cursing, explicit sex, slow burn

summary: you were off limits for more reasons than mark could count. but everything changed for him the day you walked into his tattoo shop with those big innocent eyes and a laugh like his favorite song. he couldn’t. he wouldn’t. and yet…

*a/n*: hiiiiii! so here we go. i don’t have much to say except that you’ll probably notice this chapter is a bit shorter than they usually are for my fics. with this story, chapters may or may not be shorter in length. this is just easier on me, and helps me to keep a regular posting schedule. now, i’m not going to say i won’t post longer chapters, but i just wanted to get it out there. i have a tentative posting schedule in mind, which i’ll make a post about later, but i’d say you can probably expect a new chapter every two weeks.

also, just want to say- i hope everyone is staying safe and healthy right now. stay home, wash your hands, avoid contact with your face, and if you have to order food tip your delivery drivers a lil extra! and to those that don’t get to stay home and still have to work, i’m right there with you. we’ll get through this and all we can do is take it day by day ❤️

✩ index here ✩

make sure you read the prologue first!

Today had started just like any other day. Mark got up and went about his morning, brushing his teeth, eating his breakfast, and taking his usual ten minutes to sketch the ideas in his brain before heading off to work.

It’d been slow, but Mark wasn’t worried. There were enough appointments on Saturday and Sunday to make up for a slow Friday. The temperature had reached an uncomfortable high, so he’d dressed himself in a black muscle tee to offer some relief from the sticky air.

The early afternoon went smoothly. Mark took the opportunity to work on some new designs and do some organizing in his tattoo room, while the other guys opted to sit around showing each other funny videos on their phones.

By the time lunch rolled around, he decided to sit outside with his iced coffee, scrolling through social media on his phone while relaxing in the shade of the awning. He glanced up mindlessly, his eyes drawn to a figure standing across the street.

A girl holding an ice cream cone. Mark’s breath caught in his throat because, no, it wouldn’t be you. You’d be back home, attending some tiny college where your parents could keep a watchful eye on your every move, not here in the great big city.

Then the girl dropped her ice cream cone, her whine audible even from where Mark sat. He couldn’t help the laugh that fell from his lips. He shook his head, just as there was a knock behind him on the glass of the door.

Dahyun popped her head out. “Youngjae needs help grabbing some boxes from the back, can you help? Jackson and Yugyeom are being assholes.”

Mark nodded, one last glance across the street before he stood up, heading back inside.

-----

You took in a deep breath, squeezing your eyes shut as Mark pressed the tip of his tattoo gun to your skin. Just the constant buzzing of the tool was enough to set your nerves on edge.

Once you felt it, though, it wasn’t so bad. It hurt, but you’d been through worse. It was comparable to a thousand tiny kittens scratching you with their claws, over and over again.

“You doing alright?” Mark asked, once one long minute had passed.

You nodded, your arms squeezing the back of the chair you were straddling. It was an uncomfortable position, but it was the only way Mark would be able to access the back of your shoulder. You’d also had to strip down to just your bra, so at least you were given some modesty.

“Yeah. Just... how long will it take?”

Glancing over your shoulder, you noticed how hard he was concentrating. His tongue was stuck between his lips, peeking out the corner. He was entirely focused on the art that he was tracing onto your skin.

“Not long. The shading is what will take the longest, but it’s small, so I should have you out of here within the hour.”

You exhaled slowly and pressed your forehead into the cushioned back of the chair as he went over the same area a few times. Though he muttered a ‘sorry’, you found yourself wincing from the pain.

Yerin had left to get ready for work, as the stenciling and position process had gone on longer than either of you had thought. You’d made Mark move the stencil several times until you liked the positioning. Admittedly, it had been a stalling tactic to delay the inevitable pain that was coming.

“How’s Taehyung?” Mark asked, just as he took a break from tracing onto your skin. You opened your eyes to see him reaching for a cloth to wipe across your skin.

The question caught you off guard. Just the name of your brother was enough to rub salt into the wound you’d been holding closed for the last two months. You gulped, turning your face to press your other cheek into the chair, hiding your expression.

“He’s good. He’s been in Japan for two years now, I think. He’s happy there.”

You barely even noticed Mark returning to your tattoo, the pain less noticeable while your mind was occupied.

“That’s good. I saw on Facebook he has a girlfriend now?”

You nodded. “Mhm. Her name’s Jennie--she seems nice.”

Mark didn’t need to know that you hadn’t spoken to your brother since the week before you moved to Seoul. He didn’t need to know you’d been avoiding his calls, texts, and e-mails. Most of them you deleted without even opening.

From what you knew, Taehyung and Mark had simply drifted once they both moved out of your tiny town and started creating a life for themselves. Taehyung spent his years after college roaming the world, taking photos and putting on exhibits until he secured a steady photography job for a Japanese magazine.

Mark moved before that, though you hadn’t known he’d moved to the city until today. You hadn’t ever been close to him besides the casual greeting when he’d be downstairs playing video games with Taehyung while you were doing homework.

When you were younger, you’d had an innocent crush on him, only because he was one of the few boys that paid you any attention. You’d only ever had a handful of conversations, but he was always polite and even helped you with your math homework once or twice. It really hadn’t taken much to impress you back then.

“So, how long have you been in the city?” Mark asked.

You were grateful for the slight change in subject. It was only a matter of time before he started asking about your parents, and you wouldn’t have been able to pretend any longer.

“A couple of months. I just… wanted a change,” you told him honestly.

Maybe you’d gotten more than you’d bargained for… but regardless, you were grateful for your newfound independence.

“I get it,” Mark replied. “Alright, outline is done. Now we’ll just have to shade. I’ll give you a few minutes, okay?”

You lifted your face from the back of the chair and sat up straight. “Can I see it?” you asked.

It took a moment for you to realize Mark’s ears were turning red because without the shield of the chair, your entire bra-clad chest was now on display for him. It didn’t help that you’d chosen a pink, lacy bra just because it was the first one you’d grabbed out of your laundry bag.

Quickly, you leaned forward again to cover yourself with the chair, biting forcefully onto your lip. You could feel your cheeks burning with embarrassment.

“Sorry…” you said.

Mark cleared his throat and turned around, reaching for a handheld mirror on the table behind him. “It’s okay… I’ve definitely seen worse. Not that it was bad, or, well-”

It was obvious he’d put his foot in his mouth. You found yourself giggling, bringing your hand up to cover your mouth. Mark looked as if he was desperate for the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

“Sorry,” he said, shaking his head at himself as he turned back around. “Here,” he said chuckling softly as he held up the mirror behind you so that you could see the work he’d already done.

You managed to stifle your giggles as you turned your head. It was no wonder Mark was known for pieces like this--his lines were crisp and clear, flowing in such a way that it looked as if your skin was born with this intricate design. You couldn’t wait to see how it looked when it was complete.

“Good?” he asked.

“I love it,” you said, smiling wide. “Makes the pain worth it.”

Mark looked pleased with your answer. He set the mirror down and got up, switching out the ink on his pen for the color he was going to use for the petals, a soft cool toned purple.

You resumed your position against the chair after a few more minutes, fists clenched as you prepared for the pain.

-----

It turned out not to be so bad. Mark kept you distracted, asking you questions about your experience in the city so far. When he sensed you avoiding the topic of home or your parents, he didn’t push.

Once he got your tattoo bandaged up, you sat around talking for another half an hour while he showed you photos of his drawings, as per your request. You’d never known that he was so talented.

“I guess I should be going,” you said after a lull in conversation. If you wanted to get back to your room before your roommate began their daily music blasting and loud video game routine, you’d need to head back.

“Where are you staying?” he asked, pulling off his gloves and washing his hands in the miniature sink against the wall.

“Just… this little place,” you answered. Little was an understatement.

When you’d moved out, you’d only had a suitcase and a finite amount of cash. It hadn’t exactly been planned, so your options were limited. You stayed in the first hostel you could find, and you were disappointed to find that the wages you received from serving couldn’t provide you with anything better.

You shared a room, currently with a Russian girl a few years older than you that seemed to only be staying in Seoul to play shooting games and blast ear-piercing rock metal. Your last roommate hadn’t been nearly as bad, but you weren’t having great luck.

“Here, I’m just finishing up for the day. Why don’t we grab a bite to eat, then I’ll take you home.”

Your efforts to refuse his offer were basically ignored. He gave you no choice as he led you out to the front room to pay for your tattoo, whispering something lowly to Dahyun as she wrote up your bill.

“Mark,” you said in protest once you saw the total. You didn’t know much about tattoo pricing, but you were sure this was significantly lower than it should have been.

“What? It’s a family and friends discount.”

You sighed. As much as you wanted to refuse his help, you had to admit you could take whatever discounts you could get. Tattoos were expensive and you certainly didn’t have the budget to get one as impulsively as you had today.

“I’ll get my stuff ready, then I’ll meet you outside, okay?” Mark asked and you nodded, watching as he walked off to his room.

“Family and friends, huh?” Dahyun asked, eyebrows raised as she watched you sign your receipt. “You must have gotten really close back there.”

You laughed, sliding the receipt back over the table. “It turns out, he used to be best friends with my older brother. So… family, I guess,” you said, though you never really saw him as such. No matter how many times your mother acted like he was her second son.

“Wow, small world,” Dahyun said as she handed over a sheet of paper with a list of bullet points on it. She went over the aftercare process, recommending the creams and ointments that she preferred, and ways to help it heal faster.

After thanking Dahyun over and over for her kindness, you gathered your things and waited outside of the front door for Mark.

When your day began, you never would have thought you’d be having dinner with your brother’s old best friend, bringing back memories you hadn’t quite been ready to revisit. But he was so sweet to you, so easy to talk to, you couldn’t bring yourself to say no. You didn’t want to say no.

You’d always admired Mark’s choice to move to Seoul straight out of school, with no plan and no connections to the city. And he only came back for holidays and special occasions. While you were hastily packing your clothes into a duffel bag, you remembered thinking briefly of him.

“Ready?” Mark asked from behind you as he exited the shop. The sunlight hit his skin, bringing your attention to the swirling designs upon his shoulder. The way his shirt was cut allowed you a peek of his ribs—you could see loopy cursive etched on his skin but you were unable to make it out.

“Yeah, let’s go,” you replied with a smile, tearing your eyes from his bare skin.

#writing #fanfic #got7 fanfic #mark tuan #mark tuan fanfic #mark fanfic #mark smut #mark angst #mark tuan smut #got7 scenario #got7 smut #got7 angst

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a-froger-epic · 4 years

Text

Nastally’s Sex Talk: the penis

Dear aspiring smut writers and curious readers,

One reaction that has been brought to my attention following a recent smutty chapter of my collab with @quirkysubject Good Company was the following:

“DICKS FUCKING TWITCH?????“

Yes, my dear readers, dicks do indeed fucking twitch. A lot. And not knowing that is perfectly fine if you've never encountered one in the wild! And perhaps you don't plan to either, which is also perfectly fine. So I've decided to write a (not too serious) educational post about the known behaviours of the penis. It has been checked over for accuracy by an actual, real life owner of a penis 😆 and I hope that it might come in useful if you're a young writer or if you're simply curious!

Let's begin with the basics. Dicks get hard. We all know that. But that process isn't always as straightforward as soft-to-hard-to-orgasm.

First off, speaking in general, it's not hard to get a penis hard. (Ha-HA! See what I did there? ...I'm sorry, I'll stop.) Especially when the owner of said penis is younger. A sultry look, a glimpse of nudity, a naughty thought, a poke, the very mention of sex, a balmy summer breeze and whoops! Erection. It can be a matter of seconds and generally takes little effort. Someone with a penis can also be in an in-between state, between a full erection and being completely soft. If they’re a bit turned on, and their dick is a bit interested, they might have a semi which means the penis swells up a bit but doesn't get fully hard. This can also happen for almost no damn reason at all. In fact, full erections can happen for almost no damn reason at all such as simply waking up in the morning (a common occurrence known as morning wood). Maintaining an erection is another thing, but we'll get to that.

People with penises can be grow-ers or show-ers. Some penises just get hard and barely seem to grow at all - mostly those which are already quite impressively large when soft. Others can look really quite small when soft (like 5cm) and grow to easily more than twice that when erect. If you're interested in average penises sizes, here is a handy map for you.

But penises don't always get hard and stay hard. Depending on what is happening, they can get a bit softer, go to half-mast, or lose the erection completely. It's physical as much as psychological. Pain is a funny one, because for a fair few people it is a stimulant during sex, while for others it may be a complete and immediate turn off. Also, just because a penis isn't rock hard the entire time doesn't mean its owner isn’t turned on. It just means the penis isn't being directly stimulated. Also, in order for an erection to happen in the first place, certain muscles have to relax to allow blood to flow in. Which explains why stress/pressure/anxiety are complete boner killers.

Now we get to the twitching! Just like an owner of a vagina can engage the pelvic muscles and contract the vagina, people with a penis can move their erect penis about a bit doing the exact same. Here is a somewhat NSFW gif (no actual nudity) if you're interested in seeing that in action. It can be a little twitch or a big sort of jump, almost, and while it can be done on purpose it isn't always voluntary. Just like if someone tickles you and makes your muscles twitch, or if your vagina gets those little contractions/spasms of pleasure when sexy things are happening, involuntary movement can happen in response to a caress or a very arousing thought. So yes, when dicks are straining against the confines of their trousers in fics they are very much doing exactly that.

Dicks also pulse and throb. As the penis is made of sponge tissue, if you wrap a hand around it tightly when it's full of blood and very hard, you can feel it throbbing. And during ejaculation, it pulses with the contractions which happen during orgasm. Just like with a female (anatomically and biologically speaking) orgasm, there's no set number of contractions. Some orgasms last longer and some are shorter.

Another interesting thing that happens when a penis becomes erect is that the testicles draw up towards the body and become tighter and bigger. People with a penis experience their arousal in their balls as much as you may experience a heat/tingling in any part of your vulva when you're turned on. A lot of people enjoy playing with/having their balls played with, although they're not as sensitive as the penis. (There is also a thing called a retractile testicle, where a testicle might get stuck in the groin rather than descending back down into the scrotum.)

The most sensitive part of the penis is the glans, that is, the penis head. It's made from the exact same tissue as your clitoris, it's essentially the same in that way. The frenulum, the spot on the underside of the penis where the foreskin connects to the head, can be particularly sensitive. But just like with a clitoris, you can't be too rough with that part of the penis. It will hurt. So, just rubbing the shaft of a dick isn't really going to get most people off. It's all about the head, and having a foreskin (which we'll get to in a moment) helps with that immensely because you can just slide it up and down over the head, and it feels very, very nice. Penises leak a bit of precome (some drops, we're not talking vagina levels of moisture) when their owners are very turned on, which also helps with things staying nice and slippery.

Lastly, the foreskin. Dear Americans - the vast majority of European biological males have foreskin. Circumcision is not a big trend here! So using lotion and lube and such to have a wank is not popular in Europe, because thanks to the foreskin sliding up and down over the penis head, it doesn't hurt. The foreskin usually retracts quite a bit when the penis is hard though, so the glans is visible. Circumcised people always have the head of their penis exposed and need something to provide that slipperiness for a wank or a hand job, or else it's more pain than pleasure.

Lastly, here is a fantastic website which demonstrates different masturbation techniques that give you a great idea about how exactly anyone with a penis might get off! It has amazing gifs featuring a large cucumber. 😆

I hope you learned something today. By all means, comment to leave suggestions if there are other sex-related topics you would like me to elaborate on! I feel like I may have a lot to say on the subject of orgasms, anal sex and nipples... 😏

Thanks also to @quirkysubject for the input.

#sex ed #sex education #the penis #male biology #erections #nastally's sex talk

67 notes · View notes

weeklyfangirl · 4 years

Text

Frat Boy Pt. 21

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7 (1), part 7 (2), part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13 , part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18, part 19 , part 20

HI LOVIES. Please enjoy a Friday update on the Frat Boy universe. This one is a bit of a breather after the TUMULTUOUS ANGST of the last chappie. Shorter than my usual, but it’s all the chapter needed. Tons more y/n and Harry interaction on the way in the next! Have a safe and happy day loves xx

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Things I want:

Live a life that helps others

Financial freedom

Experience a great love

Visit the the Pincio Gardens in Italy

To have more dreams and fewer nightmares

Doodle more

Acquire a first edition book, either because an old friendly man who owns an antique bookshop decides to give it to me in a bonding moment, or because I have accomplished #2 and I am celebrating being a Boss Bitch

To be happy

Please note: not necessarily in that order

It was taped above my desk, waiting for me to bring it in to the next session. I hesitated to write number 6. It was a dream I hardly entertained after committing my scholarly life to pursue medicine. I used to love to doodle. All the time. Since elementary school. I doodled so much my mom dedicated a wall in the house to my illustrations. She hung a sign above it that affectionately said “Y/N’s Doodles.” Seriously, you couldn’t get me to stop. Even if it was gross sappy sketches of my crush Billy who I would NEVER show on the playground at recess.

My doodling stopped how these things normally do. Because life grew busier than anything else, and the sketchpad and easel my dad had bought for me at a garage sale became ignored, collecting dust in the corner of my room. At some point, it’d become a year since I’d drawn anything, and then it was two, and three, and by this point I’d realized I was the one who’d need to create her own stability in life and medicine was the more logical fit. It wasn’t that I didn’t see the value in drawing anymore, I just had other things take up my time. It became a comfort just knowing I used to draw. Paul had paved his way, and now I was on my way to do the same. At least with medicine, my soul felt fed. It was almost comfort enough.

“oH WE GOT A ROGUE ONE.”

A flying toenail hit my eye.

“WHAT THE-” I flailed my arms, as though there were a thousand more coming. Renny’s mouth opened in shock, her guilty body hunched over her bent leg. Clippers in hand.

“Sorry!!” Renny burst up laughing.

“oH MY GOSH CAN YOU DO THAT OVER A TRASH CAN OR SOMETHING?!”

“IT HAD A MIND OF ITS OWN!!” she screamed back.

I blinked rapidly, my left eye watering up and spilling painless tears. “Well I’m going to have conjunctivitis at the studio later. Or I’ll be stumbling in blind.” I wiped it away.

I heard another clip and she put up her hands with another giggle.

“All done. And you won’t stumble, I’m going to be there.” Renny extended her leg, her perfectly trimmed foot nearly touching the ceiling.

“You’re just going to solicit Zayn to be his next subject.”

“Maybe,” her grin grew devious. “But also because I want to see if he captured the angelic beauty and complex nymph nuances of my best friend.”

I put a hand to my chest, still aching from uncertainty. “Honored.”

“Want to watch another episode until it’s time to go?”

This whole lazy morning had been an OC Housewives bingefest. She’d seen it on my homepage and had a complete spazz, twitching whilst proclaiming but i’ve been trying to get you to watch this show for YEARS!! When she saw the old season I was on, though, she didn’t have to question why her pestering had miraculously worked. She didn’t mention him aloud besides giving me a pointed look. And so, we watched it, even though I wasn’t really in the mood to see anything about Harry right now. It’d hurt more than I thought to walk away from him last night, and to see how sad he looked when I did.

After last night, he hadn’t posted anything to social media. He’d called, twice, but I knew he was drunk, or worse, and I was tired, and whatever he would say he could tell me in the morning. Even though I knew he wouldn’t.

And he didn’t.

And therein lay the problem.

It hurt to see his family on my little box of a computer screen, weird to see his life and get glimpses of his childhood. I felt like a hacker spying on home videos. But then I reminded myself that thousands of people had already done the same. At this point, it was just… morbid curiosity.

“Nah, I don’t know if I can handle any more of that right now. Dr. Rhinecuff is going to yell at me if I don’t return these scanned copies to him by Monday.”

“Ew, he smells like meat.”

“RENNY!!”

“I’m just saying. That one time I went with you it smelled like pastrami in his office. He has a PhD, but isn’t with-it enough to buy air freshener.”

“He likes pastrami sandwiches, let him live.”

She scrolled on her phone, not bothering to respond, and my gaze turned to the window.

“Hey Renny?”

“Hm.”

A bird flew close to the glass, halting just before it hit it, then zooming off in the opposite direction. “What’d you do when your parents were fighting?”

“Ummm…” I knew the question registered in her mind when she stopped scrolling, suddenly concerned. “Are your parents okay?”

“Yeah. I mean, kind of.” I glossed over it, not caring to get into the bitter details. “I was just curious.”

“Uhh..” She plucked at the soft cotton of her cotton candy pajamas that were fraying at the knees. “I lost my virginity to Zach,” she half-laughed.

“Zach? Neighbor boy Zach?”

Renny nodded. She always sounded a little sad when she talked about him. Zach was the hot college boy who shared a backyard fence with Renny, the girl who may or may not have used her kitchen stool to peak over and see him workout on the grass every summer he came home. I’d known they’d slept together. I just didn’t think he was her first.

“I just tried to be out of the house as much as I could,” she said. “Found my true love Mary J.”

“Oh.”

“It was shitty, but I’m glad I got it over with.”

“The divorce or your virginity.”

“Both,” she chortled. “Why what’s up? Are you sad or something? I have a j in my drawer.”

“No, no, I’m fine.” Mostly I was just wondering what it must be like to feel so sexually liberated. In my house sex wasn’t talked about. At all. The inevitable sex scene in every other movie would result in my dad blaring out “WHAT KIND OF MOVIE IS THIS!” in an attempt to make it less awwkard, but having it backfire and only make it horrendously more awkward. I wasn’t saving my virginity for anyone in particular, but after all those romance novels, I wanted it to be… something. I wanted to feel something towards the person where it would justify something I’ve kept to myself for so long. I wanted it to be intense. I wanted it to be like the books. Like a Frank Sinatra song that swept up your heart and transported you back to a time of gentlemen and cigars and women in long evening gowns with fur coats and martinis.

“I wish I could just get it over with,” I confessed. One half of me screamed YOU’RE IN YOUR TWENTIES HAVE ALL THE SEX while the other half said YOU’VE WAITED THIS LONG DAMN IT HOLD OUT A LITTLE LONGER. I didn’t know which part of me was compromising more.

Renny leaned in, quick. “Would you do it with Harry?”

Like the flip of a switch, I remembered the sensuous heat of his body against mine, wrapping me up and pressing me against him where we just fit. And I couldn’t imagine how much better it’d feel to be even more connected to him.

“Maybeeee…?”

But then there was last night.

I cringed. No matter how with me he’d seemed… he couldn’t have been present after mixing whatever the hell he took and a handle of alcohol. Did I really want someone like that? Someone who could only give a shell of themselves?

“No, I wouldn’t. Or- ugh, I don’t know. I don’t know if it could ever mean as much to him.”

Renny nodded. “I mean, don’t let him pressure you, obviously. If he does, I’ll kick his baby maker smack into his prostate. Prostate. See, anatomy. You taught me that.”

“Haha, no, he’s not like that.” My brows stitched. I was confused why he wasn’t more like that, actually. We’d known each other for several months now and he hadn’t even put a finger in me. When I thought about it, it actually frustrated me. Don’t pressure me to do anything, but I wanted to be pushed to do something. I was never the bold one in areas like this.

Not that I should be so willing to do anything with him anymore anyways. Something shifted in me when I’d seen him last night. It wasn’t a shift I could easily describe, but it’d set me a foot apart from my heart. A bit of me was shocked that it had happened so suddenly.

But this shift was new, and my heart still wanted what it wanted. I knew that if I watched any more OC Housewives with Harry’s toddler curls and surfer tan, I’d be sucked right back into speculating about what our future kids could look like. And if I saw him?

You were right, Harry. You are fucked.

I cringed again. That was harsh. That was very very harsh.

I didn’t know if I’d have the courage to apologize. What if my pheromones went berserk and magnetized me to his side??

Renny was right.

I needed therapy.

The clippers were tossed back on my desk.

“Thanks,” she said. “Have you started on your DG Double P yet?”

DG Double P = Renny Speak for DG Pretty Please.

I groaned. “No. I don’t know how I’m going to do it, honestly. I have to-”

“NO!!! Don’t tell me. We’re not supposed to tell each other.” Her hand extended in panic.

“Fine. I can keep a secret.”

I was getting a little too good at that lately.

She moved onto her belly, splaying her arms out in a dramatic fashion, face squished against the comforter. “Isn’t it just killing you inside.” She was dead serious.

“Yeah, more than you know.”

And I was serious, too.

--------------------------------------

I wasn’t expecting people to dress up as much as they did. Donned in my only pair of yoga pants and a chunky white sweater, I walked arm-in-arm with Renny past girls in cocktail dresses and guys in button-downs.

Something that sounded like a baby’s cry filled my ears, but it was gone as soon as we walked through the doors to the on-campus gallery. .

“Woah did you hear that?”

Renny nodded, tossing her head back. “There’s a baby somewhere.”

It reminded me of the bodiless screams in my nightmare. In my chunky sweater, I shivered undetectably.

The on-campus gallery rotated exhibits throughout the year, but this time, student sculptures were on pedestals, nightmarish portraits hung on the walls, and red and orange tapestries swooped down and across the ceiling in a cirque-du-soleil moment as if to secure us beneath fire. Some students had separate booths, but other pieces of work trailed seamlessly into the next.

A tree made from photographs and newspaper took up the center of the space. Zayn had been so adamant about his muse having life, I wondered if that was the focus of this exhibit - to capture natural life. But I suppose all art did.

“It’s the circle of life exhibit,” Renny stated, as if reading my thoughts.

“How’d you know that?”

She held up a pamphlet she must’ve grabbed from the entrance.

I quickly scanned the room, hoping to find Zayn quickly so I could skip out just as quick.

Several of my professors were here, including Dr. Rhinecuff. When he saw me, I raised my hand, but he raised his cup of red wine awkwardly and looked away.

My hand wavered.

Odd.

Zayn was standing by the tree, speaking with an older woman. Her skin was a rich brown, short hair hidden beneath a chic scarf. The man beside her looked around the same age with graying facial hair, a pocket hanky, and beaded bracelets. Art professors.

I caught his gaze, and he gestured me over.

“Y/N, these are my instructors. David and Ebony.”

Their eyes lit up in recognition. “He did you a great justice,” David said, gray moustache twitching with the words.

Ebony beamed. “Oh yes, a piece was already sold. He’s going to be the next big wig before he graduates,” she gushed. “Zayn, I’m sure you’ll be splitting the profits with the heart of the piece.”

She gestured to me and his smile widened, but my stomach sank faster.

“I didn’t know these pieces were going to be sold.”

Ebony sensed my concern. The wine in her glass swirled. “We thought allowing the pieces to be shown and auctioned was a good way to replicate what many of them should be doing once they graduate. The whole department gets involved, and these kids put in a lot of work, and the reputation of starving artists isn’t something we want to buy into here.”

I nodded. “I mean, that’s great. That’s… really amazing.”

Zayn couldn’t meet my eyes. He knew. He could sense my hesitance, too.

“Now he can finally afford a nice dinner to take you out!” David proclaimed.

We were all quiet for a minute. “You know, for a thank you dinner,” David covered up. Zayn’s brows scrunched and he shook his head a bit, not knowing where David’s comment came from.

“Do you do this regularly?” Ebony asked, steering the conversation away from an awkward moment.

My ears pricked up when I realized she was looking at me. “Excuse me?”

“Well I was just thinking…” a light laugh lifted as if her idea would be outrageous. “Would you mind sitting in for one of my classes on Monday? Our model had a sudden death-”

“My God,” David proclaimed.

Ebony waved her hand. “-in his family. I haven’t called to replace him yet.”

It quieted as they looked at me, waiting for a response. “Oh, I don’t… I don’t usually do this. At all. It was a chance thing.”

“Luck be the artist.” David raised his glass.

Ebony followed suit, looking at my empty hand. “You just going to let her stand there without a drink?”

“Yeah, Zayn. What kind of treatment is this?” I teased.

He did a slight bow. “Apologies. We’ll walk to drinks, immediately.” He pulled us away, leading us further into the showroom as his head dipped low to my ear. “Renny just passed us to meet Felix and them. They’re through here.”

We stepped under an archway that led into a darker-lit room, but his hand stopped me beneath the nook. “Did yeh notice anything?”

Yeah. I was noticing how close we were in this archway. He saw my eyes start to squint in thought and he turned me around to face the room we’d just left.

“Look closer.”

My eyes roamed the crowd, trying to find some sort of person, or pattern he could be referring to. With a brief seize of my heart, I expected to see somebody from the gang.

“Look at the artwork, Y/N.” His breath warmed my skin.

The paintings all seemed to be bright, though sticking to red, orange, blacks, and grays. Wait, forget a pallette pattern. The next painting had blue and purple, too. One sculpture looked like a writhing ghost, twisting and reaching for something above. Or maybe it was an unearthed tree root. Despite all the bold colors, there was something off-putting about how bright they all were. It wasn’t a soothing brightness. It was almost violent. The orange and red writhing tapestries warped the ceiling into something hot.

“Is it hell?” I chortled, but quickly quieted. I expected him to take offense, but his hand went lightly around my waist with a small smile.

“Could be. See-” his arm extended out to scan the perimeter “-all this art is supposed to represent death, but challenge the notion of it through color.”

“How so?”

“Yeh know it’s usually your blacks, and your grays, s’depressing shit. But we’re born from death. Before life, there was nothing, but something. It’s bold and necessary and there, and no one really knows whatever comes before. Or after.” He looked at the room, taking a sip of wine. I watched as he swallowed, and I imagined the wine running down. “What is death but an uncertain existence.” He said the thought almost happily, looking at me with a slight smirk. “Could be anythin’.”

He took a deep breath, letting his hand touch the top of the archway. It was then that I noticed it wasn’t just plain drywall. A collage of photographs ran all along the inside.

He wasn’t as tall as Harry, but his hand still reached the top, scuffing across a picture of an African landscape taped over a toddler eating fruity pebbles.

“They’re pictures. Everyone donated one,” he said.

A strand of words were painted over the collage, running from one end of the archway to the other, and I tilted my head back to read it. “Things... that…. make... m..e …...feel alive.”

“Everyone was able to design their space in order to control, to some extent, how their art was perceived. Everyone was a part of the transition space.”

“Very nice,” I noted, slightly put-off. I hadn’t been expecting this art show to be so… professional. “Zayn, this is amazing. Like, really, truly, professional-grade stuff is happening. The presentation, the pieces, everything.”

His smile grew wider, putting cool hands over my eyes. I flinched, but let him.

I felt him come closer.

“Listen now,” he urged.

I listened, but I wasn’t sure for what. There was the familiar busy rumble of people mingling, parents visiting their kids, and professors droning on about the talent of their students. But it was chatter. I couldn’t make out one conversation over another. I shrugged up against his other hand that was atop my shoulder.

“Sometimes you need to change where you’re planted to understand.”

I hoped he could see my cross expression because I couldn’t tell if he was bullshitting me right now. It’d been a day. It’d been a night. And I wasn’t in the mood for more philosophical ramblings - especially about death. “I don’t know what you mean,” I sighed.

“Meaning I have to move you closer to the speakers.” He let out a breathy laugh. “Jus’ keep your eyes closed, okay?”

I nodded. His hand moved, tilting my head to its side. Eyes still closed, I became self-conscious imagining people trying to move past me, and here I was, planted, eyes closed in the middle of the archway. My cheeks heated. It was unnerving knowing people could see me when I couldn’t see them. And anyway, I must’ve looked ridiculous.

“What do you hear?” he urged.

“I hear a lot of people talking,” I griped.

But right when I was about to open my eyes-

I heard a familiar chirping through the chatter.

“Birds?” I opened my eyes.

“Observance can be taught, sometimes.” Zayn leant back, looking mighty proud of himself.

“Why are there birds?”

“We’re entering life,” he smiled, backing into the space. I tipped my wine back, several long gulps lightening my step as I followed him. Immediately, I noticed much more natural, earthier tones. For being a room of life, it was surprisingly darker than the prior room.

Renny, Felix, and Andre were huddled in the center where a makeshift wall-on-wheels covered in vines divided the room in half.

My eyes widened, trying to adjust to the dimness. “It’s a lot darker in here.”

“All intentional. They decided to play with light in here. People usually think of life being bright ‘n that, but it’s also when we experience varying degrees of darkness. There’s a balance to things and the trouble is finding it.” Understanding laced his voice as his dark eyes bore into mine, almost completely black. One look from Zayn and I was reminded of all the weight I’d been carrying. I fidgeted, uncomfortable seeing myself in his eyes.

“Y/N, get over here!” Renny called. My shoulders visibly relaxed. My saving grace. “You didn’t tell me you did this,” she said lowly as soon as I got close enough, shocked excitement barely contained. Her giddy smile gave it away though. “Miss sexy secret keeper over here.”

“What do you mean?”

She playfully poked my sides, but Andre and Felix avoided my gaze. Something wasn’t right. And it stirred my stomach, my body already knowing, somehow.

I turned in slow motion, the charcoal drawings in my peripherals stopping me in place. Framed amidst the vines, my face was etched onto paper, scrunching and twisting in various expressions. But my body was attached and twisting, too. And it was bare, bent over, spread out, laying down… My eyes scanned over them a dozen times in a second.

I was naked.

In all of them.

One was titled “21st Century Love.” In this one, I faced the viewer, but looked past them, sorrowful eyes, brows furrowed, breasts I’d never shown on full display. A hickey or two on my neck. A painful sting gripped my chest. I looked sad. I looked so sad.

Tunnel vision, a blurred Renny rushed down to the floor, and a distant part of me registered something wet splatter on my feet.

The wine had dropped.

I’d dropped it.

I was trapped in a shell. My body was numb.

“Babes, you okay?” Renny asked, her voice somewhere far away. Somewhere outside the shell, her voice drowned in the busy rumbling, with the birds, with the watchers. People were watching me now. I was being watched. “Felix, grab some towels!” she barked.

I looked horrified, towards Zayn, but changed my mind just as fast. I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t even breathe.

He didn’t know me at all. He could stare at me for a thousand sessions and paint every crevice, sunspot, blemish, and mole and still not see me. How was an artist this blind? How could he not know that this was the last thing I could ever want? How could he picture me so… intimately?

The paintings seemed to swirl into one before bouncing back out into their separate exposees.

Because that’s what it was.

An exposure.

A stranger could pay to have me in their home.

The floor spun, vision spotting.

My lungs tightened, tearing me away from Renny, from Felix, from Andre. From Zayn, the artist who painted a confused girl so unashamed. So honestly. Savagely and Unabashedly.

“I didn’t want this.”

And it was when I was halfway out the door that I realized the voice had come from me, a mantra pushing my shell all the way home.

part 22

237 notes · View notes

quackeroos · 4 years

Text

locker notes | p.parker

Pairing: peter parker x reader

Summary: peter sends a love note to liz. but what if it was sent to the wrong person?

Warnings: None

Words: 1.2k

Notes: originally posted on my wattpad account @aestheticarii. i’ll most likely post some of my other works on here soon! part 2 will be published soon!

*gif is not mine.

General Masterlist | Series Masterlist

"Oh! Draw more heart doodles on it, that'll make it look cuter!"

"Ned, it's a love note, not a sketchbook."

"Why not? Maybe Liz will like it!" Peter ignores Ned's comment and continued on writing. To be honest, the cafeteria was not the best place to write one of these. His hands were already sweaty and he couldn't focus on anything because of the constant babbling of students. When he got to the last sentence, he lets out a sigh of happiness and relief. Ned swore, he saw stars sparkle in those brown eyes of his.

"Looks great! Show it to MJ. Ask her for insights before giving it to Liz." before the two could even walk up to the girl, MJ had already sat in front of them, an unsatisfied look on her face as always. "Show me what, dorks?" Peter and Ned jump in their seats at the sudden presence of their friend. "You should really stop doing that. Anyway, what do you think about Peter's love note?"

"Ned! Not so loud!" MJ takes the piece of paper from his hand and reads it quietly. Her eyes scanned over the words written in ink with the slightly messy handwriting. The boys watch quietly as she silently judges the letter. Once she was done, her eyes looked up and sets down the paper. "This sucks. Did you literally just put in a Shakespeare quote in the end?" Peter blushed in his seat, embarrassed.

"I-I thought it would make it more romantic."

"Clearly. I can already tell by the heart doodles." Ned snickered at the side, and that earned him a nudge from Peter. "Dude." he whispered, in which his friend replied with a lopsided smile and a shrug. "You know what would really make this romantic? A poem."

"A poem?"

"That's what I said, didn't I?"

"I'm not g-good with poems, actually."

MJ stares for a moment and takes a piece of special paper from her bag along with a pen. Peter and Ned observed her writing and in only three minutes, she was done. "Here. Start over with your message and be direct to the point. You were using way too much metaphors in the last one." and without another word, she leaves with her tray and backpack on her shoulder. The boys looked at her with confusion before reading the poem.

"Wow. She really did a good job on that poem."

"Yeah she did. I guess I better go write a new message."

By the end of lunch, Peter had already finished his letter and immediately gives it to Ned. He was reluctant at first, because if this plan goes wrong he wouldn't know what to do. "You know what to do right?" He asks before handing it to him. "Secretly go to Liz's locker, slip in the letter, and walk away without anyone noticing. Don't worry dude, I got your back!" Ned gives him an encouraging pat, taking the letter as he does so. He walked through the halls, finding a certain locker that belonged to Liz Allan. Peter watches nervously behind one of the trophy shelves. His anxiety was eating him whole and the fast rate of his heartbeat wasn't helping.

Ned looked around him before he could slip in the letter. A couple of students were in the halls, others were already in class, now was the perfect time. When he had successfully slipped the note in, the two teens made a run for it. Peter bumps a passerby student who was walking briskly towards her own class. Her books fall down and it echoed around the now empty hall.

Y/n looks up from the floor and lets out an angry huff. "Hey! watch where you're going!" The boy looked back and only yelled back a "Sorry!" before going up the flight of stairs towards his classroom. Her annoyed groan bounced off the walls of the halls. Today wasn't one of her best days where she normally wouldn't he mind the people around her. But a recent event had struck a nerve on her and she couldn't move on with it. She brought the burden all the way to her next class and decided to focus on the topic ahead of her.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　

Class ended later on. Students rush out of their classrooms and immediately went for their own lockers, eager to leave the dreadful building. Y/n walked at her own pace, not seeming to care of her schoolmates' loud personalities. She opened her locker and stuffed all of the things she used earlier, also taking one book she'll be needing for doing homework. Pulling out the book, a piece of paper with a heart on it drops at her feet. She eyes it curiously before picking it up. Y/n unfolds the paper and reads the letters written in black ink.

Her heart begins to beat rapidly, blood rising to her cheeks, making her flush red. Her eyes blinked once, twice, to believe if the letter was real. What made her even more intrigued was the last note under it, though it was in a different handwriting, a little messier.

Meet me in the gym.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　

Peter waited anxiously inside the gymnasium. He sat by the benches, fiddling with the ends of his hoodie. His heart was racing and his mind was all over the place. What was taking her so long? He couldn't stand waiting and the longer the minutes had passed, the more he was getting anxious. Thirty minutes had passed and Liz was still nowhere in sight. Everyone in school was probably out by this time. Peter decided it was finally time to leave.

He looks at the time on his phone again and back to the doors of the gym. "I better leave." he says to himself before taking the straps of his backpack. Just when he was about to leave, the gym doors suddenly burst open. Peter froze in his place like a reindeer caught in headlights. His heart beats rapidly and palms start to get sweaty. He becomes calm for a little bit, only to realise that it wasn't Liz who came. In fact, it was another girl.

Peter had seen her a few times; along the halls, in some of his classes and in the cafeteria. Y/n, he thinks her name was. She was mostly known for being Liz's cousin, a member of the student council and homecoming committee.

"Uhh... Hi." Peter greets softly. "I was just about to leave. The gym's all yours."

The girl didn't reply, instead he looked at him blankly. She strides towards Peter and met him face to face. Y/n was just a few centimeters shorter, so it wasn't hard to meet his eyes. Peter awkwardly stands, he grips on the straps of his backpack even tighter. "Uhhm... If you need to go have some alone time to plan for the homecoming I can totally do it."

"Parker, right?" She speaks up. Peter making him look up from the ground. "Y-yeah. I'm Parker. P-peter Parker." he manages to reply.

Her eyes squints and it made Peter feel more intimidated, despite being a little smaller than her. "Alright then, Peter Parker. Before you leave, I have one question for you." Y/n reaches in the pocket of her pants and pulls out a piece of paper. She held it in between her index and middle finger. He recognised the paper immediately, his blood turns cold.

"Did you write this?"

part 2 of Locker Notes

enjoyed this story? let’s talk about it!!

tagging people who might be interested: (basically just all of my idols and mutuals)

@hollandroos @roses-hxlland @delicatepeterparker @chxrryholland @websliingingfarfromhaz @uwu-peter-parker-uwu @pixiehollands @screamholland @painting-galaxiis @parker-holland-osterfield @hazsterfield @tomblrholland @spiderneds @kii-miii @lolaywrites

#peter parker #peter parker fanfic #peter parker x reader #peter parker imagines #peter parker x you #Spiderman: Homecoming #spider man #tom holland imagines #spider man imagine #peter parker reader insert #peter parker angst #peter parker blurb #peter parker fluff #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker fic #locker notes by quackeroos #fanfiction

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cycat4077 · 4 years

Text

Changes: Chapter 9 (the finale)

It’s finished. Finally! Hopefully it’s a satisfying enough ending :) I’m going to make one last post with all the chapter links together and then you’ll finally be done seeing posts on this fic lol

Title: Changes Ship: Sonny x Reader (OC female character)

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch.6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 | AO3 | Chapter List |

Chapter 9: Changes - A life without Sonny feels incomplete. But he can’t possibly feel the same way about you…can he?

Time passes you by slowly. The leaves change colour, the days get shorter and the air gradually turns colder. The tears you cry eventually subside, but sadness still lies just beneath the surface. Your daily back-and-forth to college seems so monotonous. There’s no doubt that you love your job and you are able to slip into your teacher-persona for classes twice a week, yet outside of those hours, you can’t quite seem to shake the feeling that you’re incomplete.

Occasionally, while walking campus or the New York City streets, you may cross paths with some tall man clad in a well tailored suit. Your stomach flips and, for the briefest moment, hope swells inside of you. But each time, you realise that it’s just another stranger.

Oftentimes you find yourself staring at his number on your phone. Though you promised each other that you’d keep in touch, you have never been brave enough to press “send”. Every overthought draft of Hey, how are you? or Hi, how have you been? has been deleted; your mind fabricating some excuse as to why your communication would be unwarranted.

Your self doubt is only compounded by the silence on his end as well. Sonny Carisi is a busy man. His life is consumed by his work; a detective by day and law student by night. Even so, you’ve imagined all the different ways in which you could be there for him: from being an ear when things get rough, to leaping into his arms for a warm embrace whenever he finds success. Fantasies aside, you have convinced yourself that he would have no place in his life for you.

Therefore, time after time, you click off the screen and blink away the tears that threaten to fall over what will never be.

Life continues to drag by and your heart remains heavy. You go to bed at night feeling low, only to wake up the next morning and start all over again. No amount of journal entries can siphon the heartache out of you. It’s hard to continue living this way. So, one evening you do the only thing you can do. With shaky fingers, you grab your phone and dial. You inhale sharply. It rings once, twice and then the line picks up. “Mom?” you whimper.

You pour your heart out over the phone, confessing to her everything about the summer you spent with the Italian detective. You reveal how you’ve fallen for his personality, his compassion, his drive and even the way he saunters around a room. The emotion spills out of you as you confide in your mother. She’s always been your voice of reason and she still is now. The advice she gives you is what you already know deep down inside, but is nevertheless exactly what you need to hear: Tell him how you feel. You have nothing to lose.

You hunch over in bed after hanging up, and stare at Sonny’s number on your screen. You resolve to take a leap of faith. You need to tell him what’s in your heart. You settle it in your mind once and for all before you have the chance to talk yourself out of it. Yet, you’re nervous as hell. How do I do this? you wonder. You can’t hide your fear or emotions behind a text or a call. You need to see him. That way, there will be no ambiguity. You will be able to know whether he feels the same or not. You’ll be able to read it in his gorgeous blue eyes or by the subtle changes in his expression. If he doesn’t feel anything for you, you can at least move on. Regardless of the outcome, the uncertainty needs to end; it needs to stop tearing you up inside.

The next morning you dress carefully, fretting and spending too much time deciding what to wear. You have a class in the afternoon so you need to come across as a professional, but at the same time, you don’t want to approach Sonny looking like you’re about to make a business deal. You want to look good for him – pretty, even. It’s a foolish notion. You’re not a superficial person and you believe that Sonny isn’t either. Besides, he’s already seen you with your hair sticking out in all directions. Still, you choose yourself a nice blouse that matches your eyes and dress pants that hug your curves in just the right way.

The journey back to the 16th precinct is automatic. Your feet remember where to go even though your mind is somewhere else. You step into the elevator and select the button for SVU. Your pulse rises with each floor the elevator climbs. The air feels thick, like you can’t quite breathe. Finally, the lift dings and the doors slide open. It’s hard to take that first step forward. This is it, you think. You’re going to profess your love in front of the entire unit. Should I be doing this? Is this ridiculous? Your heart pounds in your ears as you slowly round the corner into the squad room. It’s now or never.

You’re met with the familiar sounds of ringing phones and idle chatter. Nervously, you scan for Sonny. Your eyes dart frantically around the room. Instead, all they land on is Sgt. Benson; Sonny nowhere in sight. You can feel your face begin to flush as you approach her. Benson says your name affectionately, surprise painted across her features.

“Hi, Sergeant,” you say uneasily, “Have you, uh…Is Son– Detective Carisi here?” You stammer and clasp your hands together in front of you to stop them from shaking.

“Oh,” she responds, “he said he needed the afternoon off today. He already left.” Your heart falls. Benson then takes another long look over you, “Everything alright?”

“Yeah,” you choke out. “I, uh – it’s nothing. I gotta go,” you manage, turning to leave. “Nice seeing you again, Sergeant,” you add quickly, then scurry for the safety of the elevator.

To say you are disappointed is an incredible understatement. You desperately push the “close door” button after the elevator lets you in. You feel ashamed. Foolish. You talked yourself into this for nothing. Was it infatuation? The thrill of someone paying attention to you for once? Did you allow yourself to fall in love with someone who didn’t love you back? Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be. If it was, he would have been there. Maybe this was fate’s cruel way of telling you to move on.

As you stand outside the police department, a shaky breath escapes your lungs. The cold assaults your hands and you shove them deep inside the pockets of your woolen peacoat. You try to keep the tears at bay as you start down the tall steps. You have to keep going. Afterall, there’s a class to teach and no time for feeling sorry for yourself.

The college lecture hall holds about 100 students, your class filling just over half. There’s a gentle slope to the room that leads from the door to the podium with tabled seats spreading out perpendicular from the aisles. You have the lights dimmed as you give a lecture on the circulatory system within the heart. Every now and again, you pause to write keywords on the blackboard, allowing students to focus on their importance. It is one of those very moments when your back is turned, that you hear the click of the door at the back of the room. Immediately, it ticks you off. There’s only a half-hour left to the session and some kid decides to come in late? Talk about irresponsible!

You’re about to deliver a covert passive aggressive remark, but as you turn around, you’re instead rendered speechless. Your tongue sticks in your mouth and your heart seems to stop beating. There is no mistaking who has joined your lecture. He quietly takes a seat in the very last row, distinctly at least a head taller than the other students around him. Those expressive eyebrows you had missed so much, raise when his eye catches yours. You look down briefly, smiling to yourself before continuing the lecture.

He observes you intently as you walk your students through the lecture material. All summer you had watched him excel in his domain. Now, he could finally see you shine in yours.

The next half hour flies by and you conclude, dismissing the class. Students pack up and shuffle out. One pupil however, remains seated until the very last student leaves. He then gets up and makes his way to the front of the room. You can now fully discern his attire as he comes closer into view: A camel coat with a crisp white shirt underneath. No vest. No tie. Just a few buttons left undone near the collar. It’s a different look than you were used to but one that’s positively handsome.

“Yourra really great teacher,” he calls to you, long strides drawing him nearer.

“Thanks,” you say, beaming. “But…what are you doing here?”

“Well,” he begins, now standing in front of you. A sideways smile is etched across his lips. “I took the afternoon off wantin’ to sit in on a lecture. I had heard about this really great course ‘n wanted to see if it would be the one for me.”

Your knees become weak. “And?” you question, raising an eyebrow.

“I really enjoyed it and never wanna miss out on it again,” he smiles, eyes crinkling with affection. Your heart flutters in your chest, beating a mile a minute. “Oh, and I don’t like admitting that I was textin’ in class, but a message from Sarge came through sayin’ you were down at the precinct lookin’ for me?”

You swallow hard. “Yeah,” you say vulnerably, “I was looking for you, too.” You pause, gathering your courage. “I really miss you, Sonny.”

His smile grows. “I really miss you too,” he reveals without hesitation.

Despite his statement, you feel compelled to explain yourself. “I know we didn’t start out on the best terms at the beginning of the summer, but I…really grew to like you.” The feelings you harbour finally come tumbling out. “I enjoy being in your company so, so much and I don’t…I don’t want to lose out on that.”

You stare up into Sonny’s swirling blue eyes. They’re so kind and gentle. Those eyebrows you once found to be so disgruntled, are softened just for you. The voice you had thought boisterous, is low and calm. Even the swagger you initially considered pompous is simply confident and charming. But one of the best surprises has come from just getting to know him. Sonny is one of the most sincere and considerate people you have ever met. The way he looks at you with genuine affection and respect causes your stomach to feel like it’s filled with a thousand butterflies.

How do you tell him all this, though? How do you say I love you? But as you stand there in front of him and his smiling eyes, you understand that he already knows.

“I don’t wanna lose you either,” he speaks softly. There are tears forming in your eyes because you finally know that he feels the same way. Sonny’s gaze begins to flicker down towards your lips. “May I?” he whispers, but you’re already responding with a gentle nod.

Sonny carefully cups your face in his hands and brings his head down to place a tender kiss upon your lips. You close your eyes and lift your hands, finding purchase on his chest.

You are completely transfixed by his soft lips on yours. A warm tingle spreads from your toes to your heart, seemingly lifting you up with it. You lean further into Sonny’s kiss before you eventually part. His fingers run tenderly along your arms, taking your hands in his.

“You don’t know how long I’ve been wantin’ to do that, doll,” he smiles, accent deepening.

“Same here,” you grin. Your eyes linger on one another for a moment longer, before you turn to gather your belongings.

Sonny collects your coat and helps you into it. “Wanna grab some dinner?” he suggests.

“I’d love that,” you answer, smiling again.

Then Sonny offers you an outstretched hand. You happily accept, his fingers interlacing with yours as you make your way out of the lecture hall.

No, you didn’t expect that this is where you’d end up in your life – that a little summer job could open your eyes to so much and to so many wonderful people. You never knew that you would end up going through so many changes. Most importantly however, you never could have foreseen that your little summer job would lead you to fall in love with someone who had fallen in love with you too.

(Apr. 22: Now continued as part of a series. Part 2 here)

Notes: This is the first multi-chapter fic that I’ve sought through to completion. And while I have put off other, probably more important tasks to do so, it still feels like a significant accomplishment. It’s not an elaborate or polished fic by any means, but that’s the beauty of fanfiction: readers are generally already aware of the world and characters, allowing authors to focus more on feelings rather than needing to fully describe every little detail.

I sincerely hope you enjoyed reading this and I’m extremely thankful if you made it to the end. You don’t know how much I appreciate seeing the notes on here. It makes me smile knowing you took time out of your day to read my stuff. Thank you! <3

#Changes #Sonny Carisi #Sonnyshine of my life #My fanfic #law and order svu #svu fanfic #this last chapter is brought to you in part by Air Supply and REO Speedwagon THE masters of romantic 80s ballads #ch-ch-ch-changes #sonny carisi x reader

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tilltheendwilliwrite · 6 years

Text

Cries of Thunder

Chapter One

Summary: (Post Ragnarok, No Thanos) Asgard is gone, and the Asgardians are living as refugees on the uninhabited portion of land Odin had shown Thor and Loki before his death. Shorn of his hair and missing an eye, Thor finds solace with his friends at the Tower in New York where he meets her. A woman of quiet poise, beauty, and grace.

Fallon. Receptionist for the Tower, she worked hard, drank too much coffee, and seemed to run everywhere. A friend of Pepper’s, Thor longed to get closer, but for every step he took toward her, she took two in reverse. The fear in her eyes broke his heart.

What horrible thing happened in her past to have her looking at him with such eyes? Where was she always rushing off too? And when he learns of her past, can the disillusioned King teach Fallon to trust again, or will his own insecurities after the loss of his home keep him from being there for her when her world comes crashing down.

Pairing: Thor Odinson x OFC | Word Count: 3538 Warnings: Mentions of past abuse, hard themes, small angst

He was smitten. That was the only excuse for his long, rather sullen sigh. Truly, completely, down to the bones, smitten. Thor was certain he'd never seen such pretty hair. A deep, glossy brown shot through with golds and blondes. It gleamed like faceted topaz, but he couldn't understand why she wore it up in the ugly knot at the back of her head all the time.

Her name was Fallon Smith, receptionist for Stark Tower, and lovely dragoness at the gate when it came to people enquiring after the Avengers.

Every morning he stood on the second-floor landing, watched her rush in, put her purse under the desk, smooth out her rather plain jacket and skirt, and make ready to face the day. She'd smile for Geoff and Mark, the security officers on duty, and get to work.

Thor couldn't help but notice she was a voluptuous woman, wider of hip and fuller of breast than most Midgardian women found acceptable. If her food choices were anything to go by, he suspected she felt the same. Always picking at a salad while peering covetously at the sweets in the display case of the coffee shop within the lobby of the Tower.

Coffee was another thing he noticed she drank with startling frequency. He was surprised she didn't drown in the quantities she downed or slosh when she walked.

At the end of the day, she would gather her things and run out again. Always in a hurry.

He wondered where she went in such a rush. There was no ring on her finger, and frankly, after a weekend, she often looked more exhausted than she had before it. Thor would have asked, but he was uncertain when it came to approaching women of Earth, something which surprised him.

With Jane, the introduction had been easy as she'd hit him with her car. Twice. But how did one go about announcing their interest and ascertaining if it was reciprocated with a woman who seemed never to take a spare breath let alone an extra minute?

On Asgard, it had been as easy as sending a smile in the direction of the lady who'd caught his fancy, but Asgard was no more, as his hammer was no more.

And now, on Earth, the fair Fallon never even looked his way. It was frustrating and a blow to his ego.

“Why don't you just go talk to her?” Bruce asked as he came to lean against the second-floor railing at Thor’s side.

“I do not know how to start,” Thor admitted.

“How about with, “Hi, I'm Thor. Nice to meet you,” and go from there.”

“Would that work on this world?”

Bruce eyed him with exasperation. “Did you never talk to the women of Asgard?”

“When I wanted a woman, I simply smiled, and she fell at my feet,” he professed, shrugging as it wasn't a big deal.

“Yeah… you're gonna want a different game plan here, buddy.” Bruce shook his head and patted Thor’s shoulder.

“Hm. I will think on it.” Turning away from his daily dose of Fallon, Thor headed off to train with Steve.

***

Fallon breathed a sigh of relief when the big blond walked away. She had no idea what she'd done to gain Thor’s attention, but she wished he'd stop staring at her.

Years ago when he'd first appeared in all that armour with all that hair, she'd had a moment of heartstopping hello before Jay had come in and-

She slammed the door on thoughts of her ex. That was not a road of memories she wished to travel down. Not today. Not ever. She was safe. She was hidden. There was no way he was ever coming back into her life.

When the phone before her rang, she pasted on a smile and went to work, but thoughts of Thor would not leave her be. The King of Asgard filled her mind with too much regularity. She had to admit she liked the shorter hair he now wore and found the golden eye patch to be, well, rakish. Like a pirate in one of her guiltily read romance novels, the ones she kept in her purse to enjoy while on lunch.

They had outlandish covers and words like heaving bosoms which made her giggle, and the women in them were not the rail-thin ones of today. They were broad of hip and soft of breast, voluptuous and thick, more in keeping with her own body’s shape. Reading them didn't give her a complex like some of the modern magazines did. They were so damn cheesy, but she loved them, and there wasn't much time for the things she loved in her life anymore.

Except for them. Her babies.

Fallon glanced at her phone and quickly pressed the home button to light up the front. There on the screen appeared Dylan all of four with his baby brother nestled in his arms and his sister in the carrier beside him. Having a four-year-old and eighteen-month-old twins didn't allow Fallon much time for anything but them.

Weekdays they went to a secure daycare, one which required logins and passwords and had strict rules about who picked up her children, and weekends were spent being a single mom. Running errands with three babies, laundry, cooking, and playtime to make up for leaving them all day during the week. She didn't have the time or the energy for giant Asgardians with hair like sunshine and a smile just as bright.

Her job paid exceptionally well, thank heaven, for everything was expensive in New York. Raising three kids in the big city afforded her the anonymity she needed, but it came with an enormous price tag.

The phone on the desk rang, distracting her from her musings. “Yes, Miss Potts?”

“Fallon, it's just me. You can use my name.”

“I know, Pep. It feels weird when you're my boss.”

“Tony is your boss. I just work here.”

“You're so full of crap,” Fallon muttered.

Pepper giggled. “I need you to come up. Is Kenneth there yet?”

She looked up in time to watch the man rush in the door. “Of course.” Fallon gave him the stink eye as he mouthed I'm sorry and hurried over.

“Mm, I'm sure,” Pepper grumbled. “Rushing in the door is he?”

“Been here at least ten minutes.” She mouthed back, you so owe me, and Kenneth nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

“Well, as he is there, grab the box waiting at the coffee shop and head on up.”

“Be right there,” she murmured and hung up to glare at her co-worker. “What was it this time?”

Kenneth didn’t even bother to look contrite, only smiled as he unwrapped his emerald green scarf from around his neck and ran a hand through his short crop of slicked back hair. It was always immaculate, a rich buttery caramel she'd kill for, and he had such beautiful skin. It was as if the dermatology Gods had blessed him. His dark eyes gleamed with amusement and his lips spread to reveal his perfect chicklet teeth. At five foot ten, fit, fun, and fabulous described Kenneth to a T. He was wonderfully comfortable in his flesh, unapologetically gay, and someone she counted a friend when she didn't have many.

“Not what, beautiful! Who,” he purred as he folded his jacket and slipped it and his bag in a drawer. “Girl, let me tell you. I met a fine piece of beef last night I just couldn’t say no too. We ended up back at his place, and one thing led to another...” He grinned wickedly while waggling his eyebrows.

“Let me guess. You had to rush home and change, cause lord knows you couldn’t possibly wear the same outfit to work twice in a row?” she teased.

Kenneth shot her a pair of finger guns. “Honey, some of us take pride in our appearance.” His eyes widened in horror before he slapped his hand over his mouth. “Oh, damn, Fallon! I didn’t mean to imply…”

She didn’t let the hurt show. “Hey, it’s fine. I know you didn’t.” With a wave, she walked away, heading toward the coffee shop, feeling fat and frumpy and horrible about herself all over again.

Her serviceable black shoes with their thick heel clunked along against the marble. It felt like every eye turned her way, drawing attention to her when that was the last thing Fallon wanted. Her plain, ill-fitting suit - too tight in the hips and wrinkled - was one of two she owned. The other one, the one which fit her slightly better, was the one she preferred, but Emma had successfully spit up all over her five minutes before they were supposed to leave for daycare, leaving Fallon with no other option but to wear the one she hated.

“Fallon.” Cindy, the barista smiled. “Here. Miss Potts called down for these.” She handed over a pink pastry box.

“Thanks. Chocolate Danish?”

“And bear claws!” she said, her perky attitude grating on Fallon’s already foul mood.

“Fabulous,” Fallon muttered, pasting on a smile as she walked away and headed for the elevator.

She reached out and pushed the button, stepped inside when the doors opened and leaned against the wall after pushing the button for the upper floors. The box smelled incredible. It made her mouth water even as she called herself twelve kinds of names, all of which had some connotation as fat to them.

Getting off on the thirty-seventh floor, she headed for Pepper’s office, smiled at Nancy her heavily pregnant assistant, and walked through the open door. “What did you need, Pep… per...” Fallon's voice trailed off as she stared wide-eyed at the three men in the room.

“Fallon! Great, just the woman I needed.” Pepper turned and smiled, her sleek hair tied back in a low tail which swung against her spine over a beautifully fitted pale green dress.

She looked incredible and sleek and made Fallon feel like a frumpy old granny. But it was the three men who made her want to hide in a corner.

Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, and Thor.

Immediately her pulse spiked and spots coloured her vision. Her hands went clammy, and she broke out in a cold sweat. Darting her eyes toward Pepper, she had to force herself not to crush the box of pastries.

Pepper’s eyes widened in understanding, and she swiftly crossed the room to link her arm through Fallon’s. “If you gentlemen will excuse us, Fallon and I have many things to discuss.”

Steve smiled and nodded, but his eyes betrayed his concern. He knew something. Fallon wasn't sure what or how much, but he suspected. Bucky was even worse. He watched her with those cold blue-eyed. Piercing. They appeared to see to the deepest darkest corners of her soul and had her shrinking toward Pepper. But it was Thor who made her heart pound when he stepped closer.

“Lady Fallon.” He reached toward her but she jerked back, and Pepper stepped smoothly between them.

“Thor, have a pastry.” She took the pink box from Fallon’s trembling fingers and thrust it at the blond with force.

It caused him to frown. Then something like sorrow crossed Thor’s features when he carefully lifted the lid on the box, selected a sweet, and walked out without another word. The other two men both nodded goodbye and left with Steve shutting the door behind him.

Fallon sat down hard on the coffee table behind her and shook all over. “Just give me a second,” she whispered to Pepper as she hugged herself and rocked back and forth.

“Fallon, I am so sorry. I wasn't thinking,” Pepper apologized, sinking down to hug her.

“Not your fault. Not your fault at all,” Fallon muttered, fighting the tears and rising panic attack.

It wasn't Pepper’s fault Fallon had fallen for the lies of a handsome man. It wasn't her fault he’d been a monster in disguise. And it was hardly Pepper’s fault it had taken Fallon nine long years to get away from the man who’d used and abused her to the point she'd nearly died.

No, Pepper was the one Fallon had turned to, for help to escape her prison. The only person Jay never knew about being in her life. The only person Fallon knew she could reach out to who would believe her when no one else could see past Jay’s mask and the web of lies.

Pepper had helped her escape, run with her children, document the abuse, and file for divorce. The big surprise had come when the investigators discovered Fallon and Jay had never legally married. It had all been a lie, right from the word go. Even her wedding had been a sham.

Jay had been livid, spewing threats and ultimatums at the lawyers they'd used to keep him from finding her. But between Pepper, and then Tony who Fallon was slowly growing more comfortable with, they'd managed to see Fallon granted full custody of her children, and a restraining order slapped on Jay.

As far as Fallon knew, Jay still lived in California and had no idea where she'd gone. But now she lived with an underlying fear of big men. She knew intimately just how hard they could hit, and just how badly they could hurt her.

Walking into Pepper's office to find three of the biggest Fallon had ever met scared the damn pants off her.

“I know I've told you this before, but you need to start believing it. No one here, especially one of those three, would ever lay a hand on you,” Pepper stated, running soothing circles over Fallon’s back.

“Knowing it and knowing it, are two totally different experiences, Pep,” Fallon sighed.

“Eat a Danish. Sugar makes everything better,” Pepper urged.

“And adds more fat to my ass. Thanks, but I'll pass. What did you need, Pepper?”

“An assistant.”

“You have an assistant,” Fallon frowned.

“Who’s ready to pop at any moment!” Pepper huffed. “I've insisted Nancy take a year off minimum so the position will be open at least that long. It comes with a pay bump, a big one, as well as a clothing allowance to refit your wardrobe. You’d have access to company vehicles, the good gym, and whatever perks I can think of later. You would have to be slightly more available.”

Fallon made to decline, but Pepper held up her hand.

“I'm not talking twenty-four seven. Just an evening now and then to attend a fundraiser or party. Which, of course, you'll be compensated for as well as have whatever you need for childcare.”

“Pepper! That's outrageous! You can't offer someone who has zero experience those kinds of perks!”

She huffed and waved a hand. “Of course I can! And don't give me that bull about no experience. I know damn well you could run this company better than I do. We went to school together, remember? I know exactly what your degrees are.”

“Pepper, come on!” Fallon sighed. “I'm not… I can't… I'm not right for this.”

“Yes, you are. I refuse to let you hide away the rest of your life because of him! There are plenty of good guys out there. It's time to stop hiding.”

“I'm not hiding! I'm surviving!” Fallon barked.

“Surviving isn't living, Fallon. Wouldn't it be nice to start living again?”

“I have three kids, Pepper. Right now, surviving is all I can hope for,” Fallon sighed. “They are what matters. Not me. Not my happiness.”

Pepper sighed and patted her knee. “Take the job. I promise it will be worth it. In the long run, it will help get you ahead so you can spend more time with your kids. Or put them in the building daycare. You know it's free for employees.”

“You've done more than enough, Pepper. I need to do some of this on my own.” And she needed to keep her work and home life separate.

“Please take the job,” Pepper said. “I need you, Fallon.”

She narrowed her eyes at the redhead when Pepper looked at her pleadingly. “That's dirty pool, and you know it, Pepper.”

“Did it work?”

“Yes, dammit. I'll take the job.”

“Excellent!” Pepper laughed and hugged her again. “Now, we're going shopping to spend that clothing allowance. I love you, Fallon, but your suits are hideous.”

“Yeah, well, not all of us are rail thin and six feet tall, Pep,” she grumbled. “And three children haven't exactly been kind to my body.” Nor had Jay been kind to her body, but Fallon didn't want to think about that.

“And if you buy clothes that fit your body, you'll feel better about it,” Pepper said sternly and dragged her to her feet. “I'm giving Nancy the rest of the day off. Tomorrow, you start up here with her, going over my schedule and getting familiar with things, but today, we can all use a day off.”

Pepper dragged Fallon toward the door. “And Kenneth better be on time because he’ll be training the new girl tomorrow.”

Fallon sighed a little behind Pepper's back. What she wouldn't give to have that type of spunk and confidence.

***

Thor pouted as he munched his Danish, only half listening to Barnes and the Captain as they walked away from Lady Pepper’s office.

“Must have been bad,” Steve murmured, “to make her that skittish.”

“You think Stark would know? Seeing as how she's friends with Pepper?”

“Probably. But whether Tony would be willing to tell us anything? I don’t know,” Steve sighed.

“Don't need to know everything,” Bucky grumbled. “Just enough to make sure the asshole won't be coming after Fallon.”

“Lady Fallon dislikes me,” Thor murmured. “And I don't know why. Did I do something wrong?”

Steve and Bucky stopped so fast Thor nearly walked into them both.

“No, Thor. You didn't do anything, but someone has.”

He frowned at Steve. “I do not understand.”

“Fallon doesn't dislike you, big guy,” Bucky sighed. “She’s afraid of us.”

Thor gasped. “But… we've barely exchanged a handful of words! I have done nothing for which she should be afraid!”

“No, Thor. Not you, us. She's scared of all of us. Either men in general, or just big guys,” Steve explained.

“Someone abused her,” Bucky said bluntly. “And bad enough to make her want to rabbit every time one of us enters the room.”

“She… someone hurt her?” He crushed the pastry in his hand. “I will speak with her. He must not go unpunished. She will tell me his name, and then she will never have to worry about him again!” Thor turned on his heel to head back toward Pepper's office when Steve grabbed one arm and Bucky grabbed the other.

“No!” they shouted.

“Think, Thor! If you go barging in there with threats and raised fists, you'll only scare her and be no better than the man she left!” Steve said.

“You like her, don’t you?” Bucky asked, a smile spreading.

Thor saw no harm in admitting it. “Yes. I find her intriguing and wish to know her better.”

“Then you can't rush her. She started here about a six months ago. That's not much time if she was abused and just managed to escape him. You're going to have to go slow. Earn her trust before you can win her heart.”

“I asked Banner about such things. I am.. uncertain in the ways of human interaction. How do I express interest without…”

“Coming on too strong?” Bucky smirked and patted Thor’s shoulder. “I think we’d best skip the gym and go get a beer. If we're talking women, this could take a while.” Then he grinned at Steve. “Besides, the punk there could use some pointers too.”

“Kiss off, Buck,” Steve grumbled, red darkening his cheeks.

Thor clapped the Captain on the shoulder. "Thank you, my friends. I appreciate your assistance." The last thing he wanted to do was upset the fair Fallon or ever make her uncomfortable.

Next Chapter

Tag list available. Send an Ask, please.

#Cries of Thunder #Thor Odinson #Thor Fanfiction #God of Thunder #God of Thunder fanfiction #Avengers au #post ragnarok au #dark themes #abuse #physical abuse

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artificialqueens · 6 years

Text

cute boi {biadore} - imafuckinglibra

Meow meow bitches did someone ask for a biadore fic ft trans Danny? No they did not but you know what I’m a little trans boy with a crush on another little trans boy so yeah. Deal with it. Inspired by true events that’s all I’m gonna say on that enjoy tw dysphoria duh bc I’m a dysphoric piece of shit k bye

“Hm…uh-uh.” Danny protested when a loud ringing and something vibrating on his sternum woke him up.

He slapped his chest till he found his phone to turn off his alarm, rolling over with it in his fist to try and get 5 more minutes of sleep before his second alarm went off.

Once it did he noticed a notification on his screen of someone who tagged him in something and immediately sprung up.

[@ i_adore_u : @ nottodaysatan tagged you in a post ]

He rubbed his overly tired eyes a few times to get them to focus on the pencil drawing of the faceless selfie he posted the night before of himself in bed.

The beautiful thick graphite outlines framing every curve of muscle on his slender back and ass poking out under the covers of his blankets contrasting the delicate fine shading.

@ i_adore_u: You fucker! You drew me!

He quickly typed out a message in his dms towards the artist who drew him. He didn’t know much about this nottodaysatan guy except that his artwork was almost as intimidating as trying to talk to him was.

He’d been following him for some time and pretty much stalked his page non stop when he needed some inspiration for his own work.

His lines were always pristine, his way of curving every muscle of whoever he drew next so unlike any other and the way he could add so much intricate detailing to fabrics was just honestly mind boggling.

And as an added bonus he seemed like an albeit scary, genuinely nice guy. They had talked a few times, complimented each other’s work, talked about artists they admired or exchanged drawing tips but that was pretty much all he knew about the stranger.

@ nottodaysatan: Good morning to you too.

@ nottodaysatan: And yes I did, I thought it was cute so I had to

Typing…

Danny smiled at the flashing dots and reluctantly pushed himself up to roll out of bed. Scruffing his long hair up between his pale fingers as he walked towards the bathroom grabbing the black briefs with his stp neatly tucked into it laying next to his bed in the process.

“Morning.” His roommate, Tyler, sang from the kitchen of the small apartment when he passed him.

“Hm.” He nodded stepping into his underwear after he closed the door behind him.

“I made coffee!” Tyler yelled.

“Coffee…” He yawned while he peed. Looking down with a scowl at the silicone prosthetic poking out from his Rodeoh’s as he did. “I hate you.”

After insulting his crotch he stood in front of the mirror with his hands on either side of the sink examining his appearance.

His unruly dark, chin length brunette hair framing his soft cheeks and exhausted puffy eyes.

“You decent?”

“You care?” He yelled over his shoulder scoffing at the fact that his roommate would even ask at this point after seeing him naked so many times before.

“I brought the java.” Tyler placed the chipped black cup down next to him but he intercepted it and immediately took a hard swig of the hot coffee. “You have 2 minutes before we need to leave by the way.”

“Why? It’s so early.” He whined at him.

“Because you overslept you beautiful little bitch and it’s like 11 the fuck you mean?.”

“Shut up.”

He turned back to the mirror standing up straighter this time and turning side to side to examine his chest.

“Think it’s a tape day.” He groaned digging through the medicine cabinet for the bright orange packet labeled KT Tape.

“Only 2 more weeks, babe.” Tyler tickled his sides trying to get a smile from him. “Can I put your hair in pigtails while you do the thing?”

“Yes please.” He finally smiled at his friend and dumped the last 2 strips of snipped black tape out onto the counter.

While Tyler was behind him securing his hair in small braided pigtails either side of his head with chunky black hair ties he went to work snipping one of the strips in half.

Placing it an inch or 2 from his nipple he pulled it back against his ribs and secured the tape and his left breast against his side.

Tyler was right, in 2 more weeks he’d finally be getting top surgery and he’d never again have to worry about tape, binders or wearing 70 layers of shirts to hide his chest.

“You going to draw a new one?”

“Already did.” Danny answered while he secured the other strip in the same spot on his right side. “That’s why I overslept, I worked all night on it. I’ll post it later though.”

“Okie dokie. Happy 3 years.” Tyler took a break from his braiding to hug him while Danny let the significance of those words sink in.

This week marked his 156th shot of testosterone that he’s had to inject into his upper thigh. It just so happens the anniversary of it falls around the same time as pride month so each year he’d draw his body and the progress it’s made instead of taking a photo like most of the other trans posts he saw.

“By the way cute guy totally drew me.” He quickly changed the subject as he tucked his plain black shirt into his jeans before they left the apartment.

“You’re late.” Their friend Jason scolded when they opened the door and spotted him tapping his foot waiting for them while their other friends smoked on the stairs outside.

“Only by…” Tyler checked his phone’s time. “2 minutes.”

“2 minutes is still 2 minutes too late.” Jason snapped at him making them both panic.

“It’s Danny’s fault! He overslept, yell at him!”

“Hey! Way to throw me under the damn ocean.”

Tyler pulled up his shoulders but when they saw Jason still glaring at them they quickly ran down the stairs to avoid another scolding.

“I could never yell at this angel baby.” Jason cooed throwing his arm around Danny’s shoulders when he reached them on the curb.

If Danny had been paying attention he’d probably have made some smug comment to rub the special treatment he got from their unbearably anal friend in but reading the message he had received while getting ready was just far more important.

@ nottodaysatan: I wanted to ask you something. A whole bunch of other artists are doing this pride thing and I don’t really know what to draw but a friend suggested I do a piece of me kissing someone? Would you be interested if I drew you?

“Cute guy distracting you?” Tyler teased.

“Who’s cute guy?” Aaron on the other side of them asked making Danny blush.

“I don’t know if he’s cute or not, I’ve never seen his face but his drawings are super cute. He’s just this like really, really good artist that I’ve been following for like ever.” He explained trying not to give his infatuation away.

“Stalking him you mean.” Tyler scoffed making ooh’s arise from the rest of the group.

“Shut up!”

“You shut up!”

“No, you!” The roommates began bickering back and forth when Jason’s palm across the back of Tyler’s head broke them up.

“Bitch!” The shorter boy yelped. “Slap him too!”

“Never.” Jason kissed Danny’s forehead which made him giggle and stick his tongue out at Tyler.

He frowned at them and mumbled something about being unloved but was promptly shut up when Danny’s arm swept his legs out from under him and the other was placed behind his back.

He spun him around in a circle once or twice till Tyler broke face and laughed it off before they continued walking to the big college building where their class for the new semester was.

He did however refuse to put Tyler down once while they made their way across campus earning them a few glances from passing students.

It was still the 2nd week of their 2nd year and because their new classes were in a strange building Aaron and Danny, who were both music majors, asked Jason to tag along in case they couldn’t find their way back.

Since Jason was studying design he’d been in the building in question during their first year and knew his way around it much better.

Tyler didn’t actually study anything there but he worked part time in the cafeteria so he’d usually walk with them just to keep an eye on Danny. Not that he didn’t trust him or anything but he knew how easily distracted the pizza loving mermaid was and after the 5th time that he got lost on campus he vowed never to let him walk alone again.

When they all finally separated Danny and Tyler dragged out their goodbye like a mom saying goodbye to her kid on the first day of school.

Danny fake cried trying to be as overly dramatic as humanly possible even throwing his arms around his short friend’s shoulders as Tyler screamed some barely audible babbles about his baby growing up.

“Don’t die! I love you!” He shouted behind him when they finally did part as Danny watched him walking away waving at him.

“I want extra cheese on my fries for lunch!”

“I got to go too.” Jason tapped Danny’s shoulder while he was placing his order.

“Okay. See you for lunch? Pretty please?”

“Sure, I don’t think I have anything around then.” Jason smiled at him before he turned to leave.

“Bye, babe.” Danny pulled him back for a hug but let go just in time for Aaron to finish saying good morning to his first year boyfriend, Justin.

Despite their dawdling in the hallways by the time they took their usual seats way at the back by the door the lecturer still hadn’t arrived so Danny started scrolling through his favorite artist’s feed again to ease his boredom.

@ nottodaysatan: You know I’ll need a photo of you if I’m going to be drawing you?

@ i_adore_u: Right sorry.

He had completely forgotten to even reply to his crush but seems it wasn’t necessary, he must’ve read his mind or something and knew it was a yes.

Danny quickly scrolled through his phone looking for the selfie he took before they left hoping it looked decent enough to impress his crush. Even though he thought he looked down right adorable with his braids, the small brimmed hat tilted back on his head and the cute bag thrown over his shoulder resting against his hip.

@ nottodaysatan: Thanks. Not bad 😜😉😬

He bit his thumb to hide the grin forming at the corners of his mouth from the less than subtle compliment before he decided to take a risk.

@ i_adore_u: Why don’t we make it fair and let me draw you too?

Typing …

He instantly regretted his decision when he saw the floating dots and tried doing damage control as quickly as possible.

@ i_adore_u: I don’t want to you to go through the trouble and not get something in return that’s all

The flashing icon at the bottom left of the screen disappeared and Danny’s heart dropped right out of his ass.

‘I fucked up. I fucked up. I fucked up.’ He started internally chanting, cursing his own stupidity when his phone buzzed again.

@ nottodaysatan sent you a message

@ nottodaysatan: Seems fair. Sorry I’m in class so can’t take a better one.

Danny had to resist doing a little happy dance when he saw the message but especially when he opened it and saw the selfie he had sent.

“Cute guy.” He whispered when his mouth dropped open at the sight of the most beautiful tan man he’s ever seen.

He was in a white tank top with messy black hair and looked down at the camera with big dark brown eyes and a hint of a smile at the corners of a his gorgeously full pink lips framed by dimples and some light scruff.

@ nottodaysatan: Make me look good or I’ll kill you 😉😠😜

@ i_adore_u: Meanie ☹️☹️

Danny typed out followed by another selfie of him pursing his lips, pulling the best emoji like face he could that he quickly took just as the lecturer was walking in.

Before he could check the response Shane, his musical theory lecturer, started the presentation. Instead of paying attention however Danny took out his sketchbook and a red pencil and began drawing them.

At first he started innocently enough with a reference of a picture he and Tyler had taken over the weekend where they were on their couch together. Tyler’s arms around his neck and his lips against his forehead, perfect for an innocent enough doodle.

The longer he was looking at the picture of cute guy though the more his mind started to wander and eventually he began drawing a second one just for himself.

This time using his fantasies as reference while imagining what those puffy lips would feel like against his own or the way his fingers would caress the back of his neck.

“I open my eyes and see his head burried between my legs…I grab his hair and pull his face even closer into my cro…”

“Hey!” Someone barked followed by a very loud, very hard open palmed slap on the metal table they were sitting at which made Danny nearly jump out of his seat.

“I was singing out loud again, wasn’t I?” Danny apologetically smiled at the circle of friends sitting around the table when he realized where he was.

He had missed the entire lecture too lost in his drawing and by the time the hour was over he had finished the drawing of them kissing and was working on cleaning it up on his iPad while they sat outside for lunch. How he got there in his zombie like haze was still a mystery though.

“Yes.” They all dryly answered in unison.

Danny had a very, very bad habit of singing out loud whenever he got too lost in his work and seems like many a countless times before he ended up not only embarrassing himself again but his friends too.

“And you were singing The Wet Dream.” Aaron next to him grinned mischievously.

“Why did I ever listen to that stupid album you gave me?” Danny groaned dropping into his palms to hide his insanely flushed face.

He made a vow right then and there to never, EVER ask Aaron for music suggestions again. The last recommendation he gave was a Lords of Acid CD that only seemed to get him into even more trouble than usual. Case in point.

“Are you going to talk to us or just draw that all day?” Brian asked stealing one of his fries.

“I just have to finish this outline then I’ll be all yours.” He slapped Brian’s hand away and popped a fistful of cheesy fries that Tyler crisped up a little extra for him into his mouth. “How it look tho far?”

He sat back a bit so his friends could lean over and look at the drawing of cute guy’s lips brushing over his with his hand around his throat. Their lips only connected by the small string of saliva Danny added but their bodies pressed tightly together sitting in each other’s laps with their legs interwoven.

“Hey, Roy.” Jason tilted his head up to greet someone behind Danny, who at first he disregarded until the person spoke.

“It’s pretty.” An unfamiliar gravely voice commented.

“Thanks.” Danny turned to thank whoever, presumably the guy his friend greeted, it was for the compliment but when he looked behind him there was nobody there.

Instead the stranger plopped down onto the empty seat next to Danny with his crossed elbows hitting the table. His big, perfect teethed smile framed by dimples which made Danny’s head spin. “Hi.”

“Cute guy.” He whispered in disbelief feeling his face turn pale as if he’s see a ghost.

“Name’s Roy actually but that works too.” He laughed nodding his head. “I thought I’ve seen you around before. If I knew we went to the same college I’d have said hello sooner.”

“Um…” Danny’s mouth flapped open and shut for a few seconds like a fish out of water before he looked to Jason in fear.

“Danny, that’s Roy he’s a 4th year. Roy that’s Danny, he’s shy.” Jason clarified pointing to each boy as he introduced them.

“So listen, I sketched something in…”

“I gotta’ go.” Danny interrupted him and with his iPad in hand he ran off towards the other side of campus for his commercial music class.

Roy wanted to run after him but his legs locked up when he realized how desperate and uncool it would look.

“Sorry for scaring of your friend.” He looked to the students around the table, tapping the metal with his index finger to drown out the awkward silence when nobody responded.

“I know how you can make it up.”

When Danny got home after his last class, too embarrassed of his behavior at lunch but even more from the fact that cute guy, Roy, saw what he drew of them Danny decided a nap was probably the best option.

Well embarrassment and the fact that he didn’t sleep more than about 3 or 4 hours the night before and his body wasn’t taking the fatigue well.

He woke up very grumpy 2 hours later when he heard his friends in the living room chattering and making themselves lunch and walked out ready to give them an earful for so rudely interrupting his peaceful afternoon nap.

“You mother fucking cocksuckers!” He yelled swinging his door open but stopped dead in his tracks when he saw a new face amongst the group of boys.

“Hey. Cute briefs.” Roy raised a hand to wave but before he actually could Danny ducked back into the room slamming the door shut abruptly behind him.

‘Fuck me running.’ He closed his eyes praying this was a bad dream. No way did the cute guy he’s been crushing on for over a year even before seeing his picture just see him without a shirt on.

He was going to laugh at his taped down chest any second now he knew it. The sooner Roy left the better that’s the only solution. He’d leave and they’d never speak again.

Or he’d leave and tell everyone what a gross freak he was.

‘Shit!’ He threw the book closest to his reach against the bed.

“Something I said?” Roy asked when Danny came back out after calming himself, this time with his shirt on and his jean half hazardously pulled up.

‘God he’s cute.’ Roy shifted in his seat at the sight of him, making sure it wasn’t too noticeable by leaning for his cup of coffee in the process.

“No.” Danny pouted walking into the kitchen before returning with a beer and making sure to stand on the other side of the room away from him.

Roy took a sip from his cup to collect his thoughts so he could perfectly and effortlessly recite the excuse he had prepared as to why he was in his apartment.

“Just came over to talk about those drawings. Thought maybe we could do a collab? You can work on the shading and color since your digital shading is phenomenal and I don’t have a tablet or anything and then I can do the fabrics and bodies.”

“I don’t want to work with you.” Danny blurted out in the coldest tone he could muster given his embarrassed state.

“You don’t?”

“I just don’t like your like energy man.”

If he had looked up from the tab of his beer can that he was fiddling with he’d have seen the hurt expression on Roy’s face.

The sting of rejection hitting a nerve straight down to the center of Roy’s being, gnawing at his ego causing his go to cold defensiveness to rear it’s ugly head.

“Right, I’m sorry what’s your name again?”

This caught Danny’s attention. He looked up from his fidgeting and stomped back into his room. “Get out of my fucking apartment.” He snarled slamming the door shut.

Danny heard some commotion outside his room but decided it wasn’t his problem, bad enough he just insulted the guy he had a crush on and told him to leave he didn’t want to face the consequences or admit he overreacted too.

“What the hell is your problem?” The door flew open and Roy barged in.

He couldn’t leave it there, he should’ve but he couldn’t. If someone was going to reject him like that they better give him a damn good reason. Actually if Danny was going to reject him like that that was the case. Anyone else he’d probably just had read them and left it there.

“I told you to leave.”

“Answer me then and I will.” The shorter man stood his ground folding his arms with a brow raised waiting for him to answer after he closed the door for privacy.

“Maybe I just don’t like y…”

“And don’t give me that bullshit answer again.”

Danny stood still for a second trying to center his thoughts before he took a deep breath and blurted out his feelings. “Fine! I have a crush on you!”

“So you’re 9?” Roy snorted. “You like me so you tell me you don’t like me? Yeah, real fucking logical.”

“No I just…” Danny looked down feeling ashamed of not only his actions but his body. “You saw, stuff. Stuff that I didn’t want you to see.”

‘Stuff?’ Roy quickly deduced what he meant and without thinking blurted it out.

“Your chest?” Roy’s harsh voice softened as he slowly approached him as if he was a wounded animal who might run any second. He placed his hands either side of Danny’s hips, looking into his eyes for permission before he touched him.

Danny’s heart began racing uncontrollably fast, the butterflies in his stomach now in a complete chaotic frenzy as Roy’s brown eyes flicked between his.

Slowly, delicately almost his hands slid up his sides underneath his shirt, lifting the fabric to reveal first his abdomen with the fuzz down the center before he exposed his taped down chest.

“You mean this?” He knew what he was doing was completely irrational and way too unlike himself but something inside him couldn’t stay away from this boy.

What he knew his words could never sufficiently express he gave over to his actions. He needed to reassure him of how beautiful his body was and that he never had to be ashamed of it.

“Yeah.” Danny nodded looking away from him. “Why do you even care if I like you or not?”

Roy tilted his head up to lean in closer, close enough that Danny could feel his nervous, rapid breathing against his lips.

“Because I like you…” Roy whispered into his parted lips before they made contact with his.

Instinctively as their lips passionately made up for every second of yearning Danny’s body melted into Roy’s.

But when his hands came up to hold onto the shaved back of Roy’s head he unexpectedly jumped away and released the fabric of his shirt.

“Shit I…sorry.”

Danny wanted to question why he pulled away so out of the blue or more importantly why he kissed him at all but before he could Roy, now a bright red, was already on his way out the door.

“Hey? Wha…what was?” He tried following the boy speeding out the apartment’s front door but for such a short guy he was actually surprisingly fast.

“I have to go.” Roy shouted never looking behind him as he ran down the steps. “Sorry!”

Danny was simply left staring at the now empty street where he swore he still saw Roy’s dust cloud like some cartoon character after a hasty escape.

“What did you say to him?” Jason came to stand behind him.

“Nothing. He just kissed me and, and ran.”

“He kissed you?” His friends all shouted and he turned around unsure who to look at or answer.

“Yeah?”

“He kissed you? Like, on the lips?” Tyler repeated the question.

“Which lips?” Aaron smiled making Justin smack his chest.

“Yeah which lips though?” He asked too.

“Jason.” Danny disregarded them and turned to his skinny friend placing his hands on his shoulders to look him in the eyes. “Tell me everything you know about him.”

“Howdy howdy.”

“I fucked up.” Roy sighed into the mic of the white headphones hanging either side of him.

“What now?” His blonde friend on the screen raised both brows hiding his mouth behind his cup of tea.

Roy dropped his head into his palm, running his fingers through his unruly black hair getting ready to explain everything, not just to Shane but to himself as well.

“Remember that artist I follow? The one with the pencil sketches that he digitally shades?”

“Sure, let’s say I do.”

“I was right, he does go here.”

“Oh. Do I know him? What’s his name?”

“Danny something. He’s really tall, real slim, long dark brown hair…gorgeous.” He tried his best to regain some form of composure but picturing him as he explained just turned him back into jelly.

“Danny Noriega. He’s in my musical theory class, really good kid.”

“You do know him…never mind then I’ll talk to you when I get home.” He tried hanging up their FaceTime call but Shane stopped him.

He took a sip from his starbucks cup and looked around at the other scattered about students waiting for their drinks in the courtyard. He knew it was preposterous but he still felt embarrassed at the thought that any of them might actually be listening and see he had a heart. A heart he never showed and had no intention on showing any more of.

“This morning I met him and he ran away, so logically I went to his um, apartment and yeah we kissed.”

He watched the grin on his roommate’s face grow insanely bright making him roll his eyes.

He was usually so in control and composed, how did he let things get so out of hand and let his emotions take over like that? Roy never even liked anyone or had hookups, he didn’t have time for feelings and romance and all that other mushy crap.

He focused on his studies and his art and that was that. He was a 4.0 student who’s never even gotten a B and made damn sure it stayed that way by remaining locked only on what was important, his studies.

Yet here he was frantically calling his roommate after running out the apartment of a boy he kissed the same way he did after his first kiss ever in middle school.

He was embarrassed? Him?

The same guy who’s life motto was ‘Never let a bitch see you sweat.’? How did that happen?

Sure this way of thinking was how he got his reputation of being the no bullshit person he was, and yes some took it as confidence and others as cocky but either way people respected him and that was all that mattered.

But Danny did something to him. He had managed to turn him into a total nervous mess with one simple kiss.

“What’s up?” He heard the last person he wanted to even think about speak on the other end behind Shane. The voice of ‘it’ only making him sink even lower into his seat.

“Roy’s sharing his feelings.” Shane smiled at his boyfriend leaning up for a kiss before both men turned back to him.

“Feelings are for ugly people.” Willam snarled but Shane hit his shoulder and told him to zip it.

“Agreed.” Roy nodded tilting his head into his hand. “So how about we forget I have them and I’ll see you at home?”

He cut Shane off mid sentence by hanging up and instead took out his textbooks and sketch pad to start working on the upcoming project he had due. Anything to distract himself from the beautiful creature that was Danny Noriega.

The less he thought about him the better.

His usual method of distraction didn’t work so great this time though, all he could do was think about those lips and the way the petite chest rose and fell when he lifted Danny’s shirt or the way the faint muscles on his abdomen flinched when he touched him.

His sketch of a boatneck gown with elegant filigree like detailing soon turned into a drawing of Danny with his hands tied above his head with the same fabric as his gown. His small chest with the black strips covered in hickeys and bites.

‘Fine! I have a crush on you!’ Danny’s words echoed in his mind as he etched the blushing around his bites in with his red pencil.

‘You saw, stuff. That I didn’t want you to see.’

Stuff.

His mind wandered further to the feel of his soft skin under his fingertips as he outlined the muscle of his pec. Honestly what stuff did Danny even worry about? His chest was so petite that Roy doubted even when it wasn’t taped down it would look any different.

‘I wish you could…’ His train of thought got interrupted by his phone lighting up making his heart skip a beat.

He braced himself first before looking down at the device, some part hoping that maybe Danny would’ve dm’d him or something.

‘Of course not.’

He felt like an idiot for ever even thinking that, if you run out on somebody after exposing something he was clearly very self conscious about why would he ever want to talk to you again?

He didn’t mean any malice by it he just truly didn’t care and he wanted to try and show Danny that. Clearly a failed lame attempt to make him feel better about himself.

He couldn’t think about this anymore though it was giving him too much of a headache so instead he turned his phone on airplane mode and turned on his music to zone out any further spiraling thoughts.

With no further distractions Roy eventually got so lost in his sketching that he worked through about 4 more cups of coffee before he called it a night and packed up his stuff.

But on his way home he couldn’t get Danny off his mind again and decided to take a chance and message him. What’s the worst that could happen right?

Danny couldn’t sleep that night, his mind was too plagued with everything that had happened that day and thoughts of his rushed kiss with Roy.

“Roy…”

Jason had told him what little he knew of him like how he was a New York native ish, unlike the rest of their friend group, and how he’d been a legend amongst the other design students for his incredible garments and impressive work ethic.

For example at the end of every semester the college would put on an exhibit of the work they did and Roy’s work has never been skipped over once in the four years that he’s been there. Apparently the other lecturers even used him as an example for what the others should stride to be.

‘No. Sleep, I need sleep.’ Danny scolded himself when he found himself halfway through Roy’s feed again. He switched off his lights, turned on some music and put his phone to one side to try his absolute best to calm his mind and actually sleep.

When he realized it was a futile attempt and that he’d probably never fall asleep at this rate he, out of habit, reached for his go to cure for insomnia, which pretty much meant reaching down his boxers.

As he closed his eyes thinking back on Roy’s lips he wrapped his index finger and middle finger around his growth, which was rapidly growing more erect the intenser his fantasies became.

“Fuck…Roy…” He moaned through broken breathing when he took his now fully erect growth between his fingers and began jerking himself off faster, rubbing his head with his thumb with every pass.

“Fuck me.” His moans grew louder when he brought his other hand up towards his nipples, squeezing the small pink nub tightly as he bucked his hips into his fingers.

He slid his feet up curling his knees up shut together as the thought of Roy’s puffy lips engulfing his growth overtook his mind.

He wanted to feel him, every single part of him. His hands on his skin, his dick in his mouth, those gorgeously full lips on his - everything.

Before he could enjoy his rapidly building up release he felt his phone vibrating next to his head about 3 or 4 times and panicked thinking it meant a call, probably from his mom since she was then only person to call him ever.

@ nottodaysatan: Sorry I ran out I shouldn’t have panicked and just left like that but I like you too

@ nottodaysatan sent you a message

@ nottodaysatan: I finished that drawing of us to make it up to you

@ nottodaysatan sent you a message

@ nottodaysatan: Okay maybe I drew 2 things I couldn’t get you out of my mind

@ nottodaysatan: Here’s my number call me when you get these so I know you still want to collab 800 - 454 - 8000

Danny threw his hand over his face to hide his squealing from the joy that he actually got Roy’s number but more of the fact that Roy actually admitted to being shy.

He immediately texted Roy and after that sleep definitely wasn’t an option anymore. They spent the entire night talking about everything from their majors or art to even bad hook ups and pizza.

It was like the longer they talked the more Roy’s softer side came out instead of the harsh always professional side Jason warned him about. In fact it was more like Jason had been talking about someone completely different.

Roy was sweet and charming, a great sense of humor and quick wit and he never seemed to question Danny’s transition. He never even brought it up.

Roy - 04:22

I have to go to bed now chola

Danny - 04:22

Whyyyyyyyy????

Roy - 04:23

Bc I have class at 8

Danny - 04:23

Fiiiiiiiine. Meanie.

Danny - 04:23

Goodnight

Typing …

The 3 bubbles disappeared again and Danny waited a good 20 minutes for them to return but they never did, eventually he decided Roy probably just fell asleep and gave up.

He went to work setting the alarms he forgot so he’d have more than 5 minutes in the morning before he set the drawing Roy did of his chest as his lock screen.

He heard a knock at the door and after checking the time realized it was probably Tyler coming home from his other job as a bartender. He was just as scatter brained as him and often forgot his keys at home.

“Stop losing your…Hi.” His mouth fell open and he bit his lip to hide his huge baffled grin when he saw Roy standing outside instead of his roommate.

“God I have no idea how I’m going to function on 3 hours of sleep. I mean I’m used to the long hours trust me, but this is ridiculous.” Roy casually walked in past him yawning as he spoke.

Before Danny could even register what was happening Roy had disappeared into his bedroom.

‘What the…’ He chuckled to himself till reality hit him and he made a run for it after him.

“Hey, you said you’re going to bed?” He asked standing in the doorway where he saw Roy already making himself comfortable in his messy bed beneath the covers.

Only sitting up for a second to yank his shirt off over his head revealing his stubbly chest before he fell back down into the sheets.

Danny ogled him for a minute taking in how beautiful his body was, he wasn’t well built by any means but he sure was very well defined with every curve of muscle around his pecs and biceps perfect.

“Never said who’s bed.” Roy yawned again securing a pillow beneath his head.

“Well you can’t sleep here, sorry.” Danny stated matter of factly walking towards him with his arms crossed.

“Too late already asleep.” Roy closed his eyes and started fake snoring which made Danny giggle. God how could this absolute idiot ever be the scary bully Jason warned him about?

“You can’t! Get up!” Danny grabbed the pillow from under his head and hit him with it a few times.

Roy however quickly put an end to it by grabbing his waist and pulling him down onto the bed with him. “Shh, tired. You can continue hitting me in the morning.”

Danny couldn’t put on his very unsuccessful tough guy act any longer and instead snuggled up into the extended arm under his head to nuzzle his face into Roy’s collar. “Fine.”

God he smelled good. Danny closed his eyes to take in every second of Roy overwhelming his senses and savor the moment he had longed for so long.

“I’ll make it up to you then.” He yawned a final time before pulling Danny’s hips into his with his hand on his ass. “Now goodnight, chola.”

He wanted to enjoy the moment of closeness a little longer but when he felt his chest hitting Roy’s and his bulge pressing against him his dysphoria kicked in and he panicked.

“Wait, no. I can’t.” He pushed himself away from Roy and off the bed but Roy grabbed his wrist so he’d be fall back in a seated position on the edge of the bed.

“Why not? It’s just sleeping?” Roy tried putting his hand on his waist but Danny sprung up again.

“No.” He covered his chest with his arms and looked over at his briefs laying to the side with his packer in it.

In his peripherals he caught Roy’s eyes following his which only made his anxiety burn heavier.

He was utterly vulnerable without his packer on and without his chest taped down or binded. He didn’t want Roy to see him like this and run. Sure he saw his chest when it was flattened but this was different, his chest was different.

“Do you want me to leave?”

“No.”

“Do you want me to put my shirt back on?”

“No…” He could feel his uncertainty bubbling up along with his insecurities the longer he stood there shielding himself from the boy in front of him.

“Come closer, please?” Roy asked sitting up slightly, resting on his elbow. “So I can talk to you.”

Danny obliged stepping closer to the bed so Roy could grab his hand and guide him as he climbed with his knees onto the mattress.

“Okay.” Roy pulled him down by the waist when he got close enough so Danny would be straddling him before he sat up in a similar position to what Danny drew. “Can I touch you?”

“Why?” Danny looked into his eyes unsure of his intentions. He trusted Roy enough not to run but not enough that he knew for sure he wasn’t going to disapprove of what he saw once he looked behind the proverbial curtains.

“I want to show you something.” Roy smiled.

Fuck that smile. He couldn’t say no to that beautiful smile. “Okay.”

Roy placed his hands under Danny’s shirt on his ribs making his heart race uncontrollably again as he leaned in for a kiss.

Their lips connected slowly at first till Danny eased into his touch and their kissing intensified. The way Roy’s lips passionately locked with his distracted his frantic mind so much he didn’t even flinch when the hands on his ribs moved down to hook his thumbs into the fabric of his shirt and pull it off over his head.

“That’s not fair you’re too good at that.” Danny whined when Roy pulled away.

“I told you earlier I don’t care about this?” Roy tilted his head down to kiss down Danny’s jaw as he held his petite chest in his hands.

Roy wasn’t lying either. He didn’t care and now that he’s seen Danny’s chest without anything holding it down he cared even less. It was small, probably even smaller than his was. Small enough that he couldn’t fathom why Danny would ever be ashamed of it or even feel the need to hide it.

As Roy’s mouth continued placing kisses in a trail down his jaw and throat, nipping at his pulse point the warmth of his palms pressed against his nipples reignited the release Danny had been denied earlier.

“Oh fuck…don’t do that.” Danny moaned lifting his head to allow Roy better access to his jugular and clavicle as he kissed further down.

“What? This?” Roy smirked pushing him down so he’d fall onto his back. Danny watched him with hungry eyes as he bent down over him taking one of his nipples in his mouth.

“Yeah that…shit.” Danny moaned deeper this time, his hips lifting against Roy on their own searching for any contact to ease the familiar tingling growing in his lap.

“Why not?” Roy let go of the pink bud with a pop and moved on to the next one.

His exhaustion was being too overshadowed by the intense desire to hear those moans again, to feel more of the body pinned beneath him to even give himself time to think what he was doing through.

“Because, you already ruined it once tonight.” Danny whined.

“I did?” Roy cocked a brow letting go of his nipple to look at him containing his smug grinning to himself.

Oops.

“Maybe.” Danny blushed looking away. “I…I was thinking about you earlier and then you dm’d me and I couldn’t, um finish and then we stared talking and stuff.”

“I’ll make it up to you.” Roy purred in his ear before he fell back into the same position as earlier yawning again. “In the morning.”

“But…fine.” Danny pouted crawling over the bed to lie down next to him. “But I need the blankie between us.”

“Why?” Roy looked up puzzled at him trying to figure out what was happening as Danny tried tugging at the blanket to pull it between them.

“It’s weird.”

“Tell me.”

“I can’t…I have this thing where I can’t have my hands touching my chest.” He admitted looking away. “It just freaks me out if I feel any part of me touching my chest and then I can’t function or sleep or anything.”

Seeing the vulnerability again made Roy’s heart grow heavy, he didn’t know how he’d do it but he knew that he needed to help in any small way possible.

“That’s okay.” Roy smiled swiping the blankets away and pulling him in so close against himself there was no room between them. “Then you won’t have to.”

“I hate you.” Danny pouted draping his arm around Roy’s neck so his hand could play with his hair.

“Really?” Roy asked with a hint of amusement in his tired voice. Giving him a quick kiss before he took the pouty lip poking out between his teeth feeling Danny moan into his mouth. “Because I adore you.”

#cute boi #imafuckinglibra #adore delano #bianca del rio #biadore #college au #trans!danny #tw dysmorphia #tw swearing #rpdr fanfiction #submission #m/m au #trans character

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messedupessy · 6 years

Note

Mmh for the art raffle, rottenberry in A1 ? Maybe ? :o have a nice day/night, hope you're alright

“I-I’m just s-so fucking tired of it Berry…!”

HERE YA GO BESTEST FRENCH FRY BERRY COMFORTING A CRYING TINY SCRATCHY BOY (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Hey look another one of these, this pic have been done for like ages now but since I ended up writing so frikking much under the cut it has taken me weeks to get this posted xD still this is one of the requests i looked the most forward to do as I immediately knew exactly what it was I wanted to draw for it!

Really happy with how this turned out, the pose was a little hard to get right but i got there eventually, really like how Scratch’s hands turned out even though you can barely see them as they are black due for his gauntlet’s, but I sketched them darker like that so that they wouldn’t melt into Berry’s vest which I think worked out, tried to like leave some white spaces which turned out really well, Scratch’s expression is not fully how I would had liked it but still turned out good, due for his mouth not showing it doesn’t show the exact emotion which i wanted him to have which was that of a bit more despair, as he is supposed to be really upset in this, the tears turned out pretty good too I actually accidentally at first drew them on the same layer as the sketch like an idiot so had to redo them, the first tears looked better but oh well that stuff happens, maybe should had made them a tiny bit more shiny and white so they would be more visible but they still looks good yeah, so all in all real happy with this one :D

And because I can so will I now give you guys some headcanons/mini story something for this ship, as I like doing that hella lot, I do actually have a bit of a story planned based on this but knowing me i will prolly never get around to actually write it properly, so instead ya all get this instead especially since I haven’t shown/talked about my take on this ship before, and the reason for the text up above will also be explained

Also the shit down below got super, duper long like crazy long as I got so frikking carried away with the whole thing just so ya know pfft

Their first ever meeting did not go so well, Berry was excited about meeting his so called double thinking up how his double would be like etc, so when he finally meet Scratch he was a tiny bit disappointed as Scratch looked nothing like he thought he would. His disappointment didn’t last for long though as he quickly noticed how damn short Scratch is, Berry is at 5′1 aka 154 cm while Scratch is at 4′8 aka 142 cm though he is wearing a pair of ridiculously high heeled boots but it is obvious that he is really short.

Which Berry without thinking says out loud as a greeting which makes Scratch immediately absolutely furious as he got a extreme height complex, so Scratch lashes out with a attack and Berry easily evades it like a boss, Berry trying to apologize as he quickly realized he hit a nerve but Scratch isn’t letting him as he is too pissed off to listen, and Berry isn’t making it better by saying his apologizes like this: “I’M SORRY OTHER ME FOR CALLING YOU SHORT BUT YOU ARE REALLY SHORT AND TINY AND I CAN’T HELP BUT FIND IT REALLY CUTE!” Berry of course can’t help but to put in some flirting as well as he is one flirty boy, waggling his brows with a flirty smile while evading a still angry but now also flustered Scratch.

Berry keeps on making stuff worse as he just can’t help himself, getting completely carried away and finding the way Scratch is flustering while also been absolutely pissed adorable. Until Stretch decides to intervene as this fight/battle has been going on long enough, grabbing hold of Scratch as he is the one attacking and also you guys are ruining the furniture like not cool while saying a pun or joke of some sort.

Berry stops moving and chuckles at his bro’s joke and then goes oh right shit forgot we were indoors, then he makes a pun which Stretch puns back at but which Scratch just screeches at, pushing Stretch away from him with a “UNHAND ME YOU FOOL!” and then stomps away fuming af with the other two looking after him, Berry after awhile saying that that guy is just really cute when he gets all pissy like that doesn’t he which Stretch agrees with, but like bro you really should apologize to him properly because that shit you said was really hella rude, like remember when you were easily offended with people commenting on your height when you were a kid and how it made you feel.

Berry makes a face and looking a tad bit guilty, he goes like fuck you’re right I didn’t think of that, I just let my first thought slip as I hadn’t expected other me to be way shorter than I am and then I got all carried away like I always do. I guess I better go and try to fix this mess I made, think I will have to wait a bit tough for him to cool down a bit, which Stretch just nods in agreement then saying another pun which Berry puns back at.

Berry then goes to visit Scratch, knocks on the door and Scratch opens it immediately, after checking who it is, asking what the fuck does he want, Berry says he is there to apologize which just makes Scratch squint at him in disbelief. Berry then apologizes but fucks up a bit as he ends up calling Scratch short again which makes Scratch pissed and he tries to slam the door on Berry but he grabs hold off it before it slams shut completely, saying sorry again that came out wrong i’m sorry let me make it up to you.

They fight with the door for awhile Scratch schreeching at him to fuck off and Berry shouting he just wants to make it up to him until Scratch is like fine make it up to me by leaving me the fuck alone which Berry says he can’t because that won’t make up for what he said wait I know I will let you punch me!

Both stops fighting with the door and Scratch once again just looks at Berry in disbelief, like what kind of an idiot are you kind of way, which he also voices out loud, Berry just laughs and says since calling you sho- I mean calling you that made you angry and hurt I will let you punch me properly and not evade it at all like I did before.

Scratch is still just looking at him trying to figure out what Berry truly is after, saying Berry really is stupid, Berry replies with come on I can take it just punch me and then we will be even, you don’t have to tell me twice Scratch says and then punches Berry without warning making the other stagger back and start to bleed from his nose, but he just shakes his head saying that was a great punch, really glad I didn’t let you hit me when we fought earlier because then i would have gotten hurt even worse.

Scratch fluster a bit at the praise, Berry then adds since we are now even and you have punched me so are we officially friends now grinning wide with Scratch going what before Berry grabs him and starts running off with him, saying come on let’s hang out now since we’re friends with Scratch schreeching we are not friends put me down but which Berry ignores as he is determined to get to know his angry counter part better

After that whole thing the two of them start to hang out, mostly by Berry visiting Scratch against his will and then drag him off to do things together, from hanging out at Berry’s home to go out and prank people, Scratch starts to get less and less against hanging out with Berry as he finds himself having fun during their hang outs.

He still fights it at times but Berry is very insistent, he fought against it for quiet some time especially when it came to the things Berry tried to make him join in with, like pranking people that’s childish and so are video games, building snowmen no that’s something for children! but Berry just had to say are you chicken/does that mean I win by default etc made him immediately change his mind and join in as he refused to be defeated in anything etc.

Though still a bit hesitantly as Scratch hates to appear childish in any way, which Berry have figured out and is trying to teach him it’s ok to be etc, as when Berry was younger he had kind of the same troubles, Berry still slips up at times with short/tiny jokes as he just can’t help it even though he tries which have made Scratch get really mad at him so many times, Berry also keeps on flustering Scratch by calling him cute etc out of the blue

Berry tries to get to know Scratch better, more personally etc but Scratch keeps on pushing him away in that regard, refusing to open up, so Berry keeps pushing and kinda pester as his feelings for the other have grown into a full blown crush and when he is in love he has a habit of getting blind to the person of his affections discomforts and when he is going too far, when he is too pushy and should leave them alone.

So one day he and Scratch are hanging out, doing their usual thing when Scratch seems to be a bit more distant than usual, Berry tries to get Scratch to tell him what’s up but Scratch is not telling him anything. Berry then says if Scratch needs to talk about stuff then talk with him he will understand then he tries to put a comforting hand on Scratch’s shoulder but it is swatted away harshly by Scratch who just looks at him like he have just said the worst insult ever, saying as if Berry would ever understand what he is dealing with, and then Scratch just explodes into a screaming rant how there is no way that Berry would ever understand the shit he is going through.

“NO YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND BERRY! YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND HOW IT FEELS TO WAKE UP EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY KNOWING IT IS YET ANOTHER DAY OF BEEN BELITTLED, OF BEEN MOCKED, OF NOT BEEN TAKEN SERIOUSLY AND TREATED LIKE A CHILD ALL BECAUSE YOU JUST HAPPEN TO LOOK LIKE ONE WHEN YOU SURE AS FUCK AREN’T! YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE TOLD OVER AND OVER AGAIN EVERY FUCKING DAY THAT YOU ARE WEAK, THAT YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING AND YOU ARE NOT EVEN GIVEN THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF A CHANCE TO PROVE THEM WRONG! YOU WHO HAVE NEVER HAD ANY PROBLEMS EVER IN YOUR LIFE YOU WOULD NEVER UNDERSTAND HOW IT IS TO HAVE A BROTHER WHO DOESN’T LOVE YOU AND TREAT YOU LIKE FUCKING SHIT!”

Scratch keeps on shouting at Berry like that for awhile, just letting all of the things that troubles him out into the open. As the reason for why he had been more distant was because he had grown a bit jealous of Berry’s seemingly perfect life, as people weren’t belittling him or mocking him for his height etc, and how he had such a great relationship with his brother unlike himself, he shouts and screams himself hoarse until

“I’M-I’m just…-“, Scratch said mouth now quivering and his voice suddenly lowering to almost a whisper, his eye sockets barely holding back the tears that was risking of flooding out as he looked away from the other and instead looked down at his feet with an expression that was just completely exhausted and defeated. “I’m just so tired, so fucking tired of it all…”

Scratch tries to stop himself from crying with little success, as he is just so damn tired of all of it and been keeping shit inside for so long, Berry have just listened to it all without a word, actually a bit shocked at the sudden outburst, he then steps forward and pulls Scratch into a hug.

Scratch immediately telling him to let him go schreeching and thrashing but Berry doesn’t let him go, after awhile of that Scratch just stops and slowly puts his arms around Berry and just starts crying fully, the line and the pic above happening, and Berry just holds him while he cries and just says over and over how he is just so tired. Berry saying he knows, he hadn’t thought Scratch had such problems or that people were treating him so damn bad etc, and how this explains so much about how Scratch has been behaving and how he himself should have like noticed that stuff a bit more but like always when he is crushing he gets really bad at noticing things he doesn’t want to notice about the person he is interested in.

He hugs the other a bit tighter while Scratch has become stiff in his arms, as Scratch is realizing what he have just done just letting all of his feelings and troubles out and he is terrified and horrified about it, Berry then decides to try to break the tension a bit by saying a joke, or kind of a joke which is “Well, I never thought our first embrace would be in a situation like this.” or something like it which Scratch doesn’t take well upon hearing it getting flustered and try to push Berry away which Berry lets him a tiny bit so they are now face to face at least, Berry saying sorry not the time to say that please calm down and let me say some things.

Which Scratch do but his whole body is still ready to fucking bolt at a moments notice, Berry then begins to talk how yes he might not understand what Scratch is going through fully, as he himself have had troubles in the past with been taken seriously thanks to his baby face and also his own shortness, even though those troubles weren’t as bad as Scratch’s though still bad but not to that extent, he also apologies how he was so damn pushy about Scratch telling him stuff and that he should had pushed less etc alongside other things which makes Scratch relax and calm down

After the whole thing the two of them gets closer, Scratch starts to open up without having to be pushed to an outburst to do so, Berry tries his best not to push Scratch to that extent, Scratch is more relaxed around Berry now and doesn’t get upset as often about things, like they become proper friends who can talk about stuff most of the time, share their experiences and stuff with one another, they still fuck up time to time but they solve it much more calmly, mostly at least, Scratch is making sure to tell Berry off when he is uncomfortable about anything which Berry might fail to notice etc.

Now finally with Scratch actually feeling comfortable and safe around Berry, his feelings starts to change into a crush as well, Berry have never hidden the fact that he has been interested in Scratch romantically, or at least he have been flirting with him allot, and even though they still end up fighting time to time and that Berry keeps on forcing him outside his comfort zone which he doesn’t always like but is kinda what he needs at times, also helps that Berry is pretty damn good looking which Berry knows fully that he is, flexing and shit which makes Scratch’s soul flutter.

And as usual when Scratch gets a crush or anything like it he goes into tsundere mode, starts to avoid Berry and stuff even though he knows Berry is interested in him that way but then doubts starts to grow in his mind, what if Berry is just interested in him so to use him and then break his heart and stuff, what if this whole friendship was a rouse to make fun of him, like Berry gets around allot in that department he have heard, what if their friendship is fake and he will lose what he have with Berry if he admits his feelings and Berry gets what he wants etc.

Berry for once actually notices that there is something bothering Scratch almost immediately this time around, and decides to confront Scratch what’s bothering him as he does not want what happened last time to happen again, and after some careful prodding Scratch ends up confessing his feelings and his fears while been real frikking flustered, Berry is overjoyed at having his feelings returned that he immediately hugs Scratch completely missing the part about Scratch’s fears, getting his mouth covered by Scratch’s hands as he tries to kiss him in his excitement which Scratch is not ready for at all.

Berry immediately apologizes for doing so he just got so damn happy and excited which is no excuse for trying to kiss him without consent, he then asks what the rest Scratch said was can he repeat it which Scratch at first refuses to do so as he is pretty flustered, embarrassed and kind of distressed but he ends up repeating himself after a bit.

Berry immediately assures him that that kind of thing he would never ever do, he is not the kind of guy who would play with someones feelings like that at least not intentionally, he tells Scratch when it comes to Berry getting around with different partners its something he only do when fully single or if he isn’t interested in someone special, and that ever since he ended up crushing on Scratch he haven’t been with anyone at all.

After some more reassurance, some flirting on Berry’s part and some fluster on Scratch’s, the both of them decide to give a romantic relationship a try, which ends up been pretty much just like their friendship just much more hugs and eventually kisses when Scratch ends up comfortable enough for it, they both still fuck up at times in various ways.

Berry been too pushy and missing clear signs when Scratch doesn’t want something etc, and Scratch keeps on having troubles telling Berry the things that truly bothers him etc, they still fight time to time, though mostly just about silly things like Berry totally cheating at mario kart and shit, they way too often edge each other on to do stupid shit, but all in all they end up been pretty good for one another, Scratch telling Berry off when he is too much and Berry helping Scratch been more open and be as childish as he wants to be, the fucking end

Fuck this took forever for some reason but now it’s done hurray, not completely happy with all of it there are a bunch of parts which is a bit iffy but all in all i am kind of happy with this anyhow xD the more well written text and dialogue is from my attempt at writing this as an actual fic which I decided to include, as i like how those two parts turned out and that i will prolly never end up writing it properly and shit, anyway enjoy this wall of text yo

#rottenberry #poisonberry #sanscest #fontcest #MessedUpEssy #Essy's Art #Essy's Undertale Art #Essy Answers #Essy's Undertale Headcanons #sketch #fyyuucckk finally this shit is done #took so long because i just couldn't finish all this writing #which ended up way too frikking long #but now i am finally just frikking done with it #and i am happy #yes #now i just got 2 more of these to do and then i am done with this old raffle thingie as well #go me yo #these two are such messes but i really like them together #they're really cute #even though Berry is accidently an ass at times #like he means well but he gets so god damn focused and blinded when he go crushing #and ppl have a habit of not telling him to stop or calm down about it which is why he haven't learnt to chill about it #with Scratch's help tho he will #and the both of them will be happy af #because i say so #so frikking done with this like fenjgrjekgkjer

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entomjinx-reblogs · 6 years

Text

I mentioned I would post those one shots on here too so here you go: July Seventh

Prompt: "Do you want me to leave?"

The warm summer sun shone down on a lone figure's back, warming but never burning. Natsu Dragneel hadn't bothered to go into Magnolia that day, instead choosing to stay at home. His guild mates new better than to come here today. They knew better than to bother him on July seventh.

"The day Igneel disappeared." The somber thought tore through the slayer's heart and made him wan to cry.

In all honesty, they didn't bother him that entire week.

The pink haired mage was sitting cross-legged in front of the wall, staring intently at nothing as the memories of his missing father plagued him. They played in his mind like a move, and just like every year, he watched. He re-memorized the detail as he brought them up, silently praying that he'd never forget them.

At some point during the day, he'd moved. An old sketch book sat delicately in his lap, pristine white pages becoming blacker as he smeared the charcoal across them. He didn't know how long he'd sat there, but by the time he'd finished, there were several drawings of Igneel in both dragon and human form with detail that Redus would be jealous of.

Natsu scooped them all up and stacked them neatly. He moved an old floorboard, and slipped them underneath.

"I need to buy a binder for them."

The next year he did the same thing.

And the same again.

Until the year he didn't.

Natsu had always hated this time of year. He hated the anger that came with his father's disappearance. He hated the sadness that ripped through him like a hot knife.

"It's almost been six years now..."

The thought startled the dragon slayer, and for a moment, he wondered if he would ever find Igneel. He pulled up a picture of his father in his mind, panicking when it took much longer than it should have. He immediately reached for one of his hidden sketchbooks and began to draw.

"I won't let myself forget." Natsu became frantic, lines smearing in his haste. "I can't forget. Please don't let me forget."

Black eyes welled up when the charcoal grasped between his fingers repetitively refused to recreate the images from his memories, now blurry from time. The tears smeared the charcoal down the page, turning the beautiful drawing into a nightmarish recreation. He jumped up from his spot on the floor and threw the sketchbook across the room.

Natsu swayed where he stood, the sudden movement dizzying him, and after a moment, he collapsed to the floor atop his beloved drawings, a single thought running through his head.

"When was the last time I ate?"

It was a few hours later that Natsu finally woke up. The dragon slayer nearly jumped into a fighting stance the second he laid eyes on the unfamiliar surroundings, but he stopped when the smell of pine and peppermint assaulted his nose.

"Gray?"

The ice mage was sleeping in an old wooden chair beside the bed Natsu had been placed in. His soft snores echoed throughout the room, breaking what would have otherwise been silence.

After realizing he was in safe hands, Natsu drifted back to sleep.

Sunlight streamed in through the window and landed softly on Natsu's face. He rolled over and grumbled, which seemed to startle Gray.

"Natsu's a morning person. He's always up with the sun, not the crack of noon." Gray had been wondering that for the past couple of days, but pondering never changed the fact that he didn't wake. "Maybe it has something to do with the date?"

The raven-haired male stared at the sketch book in his hand, flipping through page after page of drawings. Some were familiar people and places, like everyone in the guild hall, while others were people he didn't know and places that seemed to come straight from a fantasy novel. They were all so realistic that they would look like portals if they had color. As if the universe had read his mind, he found pages with color on them. Several dragons were depicted, and even if he hadn't spent years listening to Natsu rambling about Igneel, he'd have picked him out instantly anyways. His best friends father towered over the other dragons by twice their height and had terrifying scars all across his body.

"It definitely has something to do with the date," There were too many drawings of the dragons, too many pictures of the place he called home, and too many pictures of people he had probably called his family. "I didn't know he could draw, let alone this well."

A muffled groan brought his attention back to the pinkette in his bed as it startled him. Natsu was was staring dazedly at Gray, as if trying to shift through what was real and what wasn't. In a single second his eyes refocused, and he tensed rather noticeably. He opened and closed his mouth like a fish for a moment, and Gray waited for him to collect his thoughts. "How did I get here?" The question came out rasp, and the slayer grasped at his throat after forcing it out.

Gray handed him the water bottle on the bedside table, choosing to wait until Natsu was done before speaking. The bottle was handed back to him after Natsu had downed about half of it. "Happy found you passed out in your house." He began quietly. "We don't know how long you've been out, but you been here for two days."

Gray chose that moment to raise the sketchbook, which caught the attention of the shorter male immediately. He tensed even more than he already was, and he snatched the old binder, hiding it beneath his body like it would cease to exist. "I know I probably wasn't supposed to look at these, but they were scattered everywhere. I put them all back in the binder for you. Well, the loose ones anyways." Some of the drawings were still attached to the sketchbook that had been within the binder, after all.

Natsu had slowly relaxed as the ice mage spoke. "I think I just forgot to eat." He mumbled. Natsu's fire magic caused his metabolism to reach insane heights and burn more calories than a normal person could ever intake in a week over the span of a day. When he skipped a couple meals, it was likely that he'd pass out.

Gray was barely able to make out was the fire mage had said, but after a moment of contemplation, he was sure of the words. "Sometimes I forget how ridiculous your metabolism is, Flame-brain."

Gray stood up and left the room to what Natsu assumed was the kitchen, and a thought struck the dragon slayer, "Since when is Gray this nice to me? And why the hell did Happy get him instead of someone else?"

Despite them being light, Gray's footsteps echoed in Natsu's head as he made his way back with what smelt like pancakes. "I made them this morning, so they're still warm." a small laugh escaped the ice mage as he continued, "After all, morning for me is after ten."

Natsu tilted his head at the statement and gingerly took the plate, "After ten A.M or ten cups of coffee?" Gray shoved his shoulder for that, but the fire mage just laughed softly. "How do you even drink that shit? It's disgusting."

"I guess I'm used to it," Gray responded."By the way, the drawings are really good." Natsu nearly chocked on his pancakes, which he'd been eating slowly to avoid making himself sick, and that's when Gray noticed something he hadn't ever seen the dragon slayer do. The pinkette's face had turned a brilliant shade of red that reached all the way to his ears, and he looked like he was trying to drown himself in his scarf. "It's probably way to much to ask, but um..." Gray got really quiet, and his own cheeks darkened slightly, "Could you tell me who they all are?" When Natsu didn't respond, he panicked and tried to correct himself. "You don't have to," he blurted, ¨it was a dumb thing to ask.¨

Natsu mumbled something that sounded an awful lot like ¨Gray,¨ and the ice mage wanted to bury himself alive.

¨I´m so sorry." He really hadn't meant to do anything that could make his friend more upset over Igneel, but when did either of them get anything right? "Do you want me to leave? I can leave. I'll come check on you again later." He nearly bolted out of embarrassment the second he turned, but Natsu grabbed his arm and yanked him back onto the bed.

"You uh-" Natsu paused as if choosing his words carefully, "You don't have to leave." He tentatively reached for the binder and pulled it on to their laps. Natsu's voice had gone quiet again, still sore from not talking for days on end, "Um, ask whatever. I guess." His face was still blaring red, but he wasn't trying to hide in his scarf as much as he was before. Gray took that as a good sign.

After a while, Natsu became much more comfortable telling stories about the dragons that he never shared in the guild. Stories of the other Dragons he's met and why he knew so many. Igneel hadn't just been the king of fire dragons, but the king of all dragons, and he used to drag Natsu around during anything that involved diplomacy. Because of this, Natsu was way more involved than the other slayers, and he didn't like people knowing that.

"But why?" Gray asked carefully. "What's so wrong with people knowing that?"

Natsu smiled, but it was more bittersweet than happy. "I'll tell you eventually, but it's a bit of a mess."

Gray nodded, accepting the answer for the time being.

The two of them stayed there for hours, Natsu just talking about some of the things that he saw and did as a child, and eventually, they fell asleep against each other.

Natsu was never alone on July seventh again

Words: 1,741

The rest will be posted exclusively on my secondary blog: Jinx13GXA2.tumblr.com

#gratsu #natray #Natsu x Gray #Gray x Natsu #fluff #angst #hurt/comfort #one-shot #Natsu likes to draw #Natsu misses Igneel #Prompt one of one-hundred #natsu dragneel #gray fullbuster #fairy tail

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fine-wolfhard · 6 years

Text

Loverboy Vol 2. | Richie Tozier Imagine

Authors Note: This writing only took a little over a week due to the encouragement and requests of everyone tagged at the bottom of this post. Thank you for your support and I hope you enjoy. Please read the first part for context.

Loverboy Vol 1.

Summary: Richie has an hour stuck with a girl he’s just met before her parents come home. Feelings and insecurities control everything | Self Insert, Female Reader, Richie Character Focused, Fluff

Word Count: 1876

- How long is an hour?

Well from a literal standpoint its sixty minutes. But an hour doesn’t always feel the same length, it can feel longer or shorter depending on the context of the hour and how desperate you are for it to last or pass.

We’re all familiar with a long hour, one where you stare at the clock yet every time you blink you’re sure the hands have moved backwards. Often experience during a lecture, waiting in line or any boring situation; later cannot come soon enough.

Short hours are another form of irritation. Listening to a new album, walks in moonlight and any positive memories in the making just seem to fly by before you can fully appreciate them.

But the current hour of Richie Tozier’s life he wanted to last forever.

He knew from the outside it didn’t appear to be much more then two classmates sitting in front of a fire to escape the storm outside. Which wasn’t an inaccurate assumption, but what wasn’t shown was the fire that burned in Richie’s chest.

Somehow hotter and bigger then the one across from him, heading the blood in his veins to every inch of his body until he was sure the blanket she’d placed over his shoulders was doing more bad then good.

It was a strange feeling, the closest he could associate it with was when he first saw Beverly. But that wasn’t the same, that feeling was fleeting and didn’t clog his throat or make him want to simultaneously run away and towards her.

Her.

The girl who was older then him by a mere year and equipped with a polaroid camera and endless inspiration had changed his perception of the world. Before her he’d assume the only people, who’d be willing to spend time with him would be his fellow losers. But here he was, sitting next to a girl who didn’t seem to care she was spending an evening with Trashmouth Tozier.

Henry had friends because they didn’t want to get hurt, Greta had friends because they feared her, and Richie had friends because they felt sorry for him.

But she’d managed to stay on Henry’s good side, avoid Greta’s lashes without finding herself in the loser’s club. How? He couldn’t pinpoint any single thing, her entirety just seemed to be likeable.

And as much as he was enjoying glancing at her from the corner of his eye while she rested her head on her knees studying the flames, he knew he needed to say something before she picked up on the tapping of his foot that was ringing in his ears.

“How’d you get into photography?”

She rolls her head back and closes her eyes.

“Do you know how many times I’ve been asked that by acquaintances? It’s getting annoying.”

She opens her eyes and meets his as he stutters out a response that gets lost behind his teeth and he wondered if this is how Bill feels each time he gets teased by Bev. But before he can form an apology she smiles lazily and turns back towards the fire.

“Sister liked photography, wouldn’t let me touch cameras while I was a kid. She moved away, a camera got left behind. I tried it and liked it, then two years later a curly haired loser thought there was a more interesting story behind my hobby.”

He doesn’t push any further, because he recognizes the emotion behind her eyes. She’s smiling at him, but her eyes aren’t happy. They’re like Eddie’s when you mention his lack of interest in girls, or Bill’s when you mention his brother. They tell you ‘don’t ask’, and he knows firsthand how uncomfortable it is when people ask anyway.

Richie mumbles an apology anyway, not wanting to ruin the serine moment further because of his habit of talking before thinking it through.

“When’d you figure out you needed glasses?” She moves on quickly, and he’s thankful they aren’t stuck in another silence.

“I was in school, like first or second grade and I couldn’t read what was on the whiteboard. I’d try my best but when I’d write down what I saw it wasn’t even close to being spelt right. It took some convincing, but my parents took me to the eye doctor who probably thought it would be funny to give me a pair with magnifying glasses for lenses.”

He tilts his head to the side to show emphasis before pushing them back up the bridge of his nose.

“Wish I’d gotten them earlier, Miss Addams had such a nice rack I couldn’t see or appreciate at the time.”

She snorts slightly and raises her eyebrows at him.

“Sure, Miss Addams is hot, but I doubt at seven years old you would have wanted to see it. I’ll admit it though; her name is spelt with double ds for a reason.”

When they’re laughing together things feel right. Despite the storm that is now raging outside with rain cascading down the windows and thunder rumbling in the clouds, things are calm.

She throws the blanket off her shoulders and practically bounces to the closest window the study the storm. Richie stands close and looks up at the sky as she does, slightly struggling to see through the condensation their breath causes.

“Rain is like the coolest thing. Shows up shitty on camera though, guess enjoying it is just a privilege of the present.”

Her words are poetic but she doesn’t seem aware of what she’s talking about since she’s distracted drawing a smiley face on the glass.

He doesn’t even have to thing twice before drawing a dick in his own breath, which they both find a lot funnier then they probably should.

The song on the radio is faded but so is the rain outside, and Richie would pat himself on the back for how well he’s focusing on her smile right now if his own wasn’t a few inches away.

He isn’t aware of the closeness until he can feel her breath against his cheeks. It’s a faint breeze that’s buzzing with warmth and he feels and urge to get closer, just so he could tell her what he’s been thinking since her eyes met his-

“Well now that you’re all smile-y and hopefully warmed up, do you want to do some indoor shots to pass the time?”

“I’m addicted to modelling now; let’s not let this gorgeous bod go to waste.”

She interrupted his train of thought, but he isn’t jumping to retort with insult to do with her mum, he wasn’t ready to say it anyway.

“I feel like a dad. A sad, slightly chubby, very drunk and about to be divorced dad.”

The camera flashes before she looks over at him with her eyebrows raised.

“That was a strangely specific example, do you know many sad, slightly chubby, very drunk soon to be divorced men?”

He pulls at the collar of the bathrobe her father owned that she’d convinced him to wear while leaning back casually on the recliner. He knows who he reminds himself of, but as he wants to make her like him mentioning his home life would achieve the opposite.

“Yeah, Eddie’s mum.” He brushes it of casually, although the last syllable gets lost within a laugh.

She chuckles slightly but is more interested in taking another two photos as he laughs at himself.

“You talk a lot about this Eddie kid and his mum, and I don’t know him but why do I get the feeling you do this very often; especially around him?” She asks while looking down at the recently printed photos.

“Obviously, but Ed’s knows it’s a joke so its all good. Sometimes earns me a punch in the arm though, clear indication I’ve gone too far.”

She hums in response, but he assumes she isn’t listening fully because she’s focused on the newly added photos to their collection. Their laid out in order of production, although he’s sure there is a few missing.

Pulling the bathrobe off his shoulders, Richie kneels to the same height as her to study the prints more closely himself. He’s proud, and not nearly as insecure as he thought he’d be this morning.

Despite the jokes and persona he presented to his friends, he didn’t love himself or the way he looked.

His eyes were too big and dopey, his cheeks were chubby and made him look like a baby and no matter how much he rode his bike he stayed as skinny and wimpy as a skeleton. He understood everyone saw the worst in themselves when they faced off to a mirror, but he knew he wasn’t alone in thinking photos just highlighted those problems. They were just reflections that lasted forever.

But these photos, they were different.

It wasn’t the angle, lighting or costume. No, it was her.

Her encouragement and mere presence made the voice in the back of his head that screamed harassment quiet. He knows its still there because without it he’s sure he would have already proposed, and he’s thankful it is because it keeps him safe from bad situations.

Unlike before however, the voice wasn’t holding him back from taking a leap of faith. A figurative one, despite the literal one he’d almost run away from last year. With her around and blatantly telling him those insecurities were positives in her eyes they stood out less. He thought he looked gorgeous in the photos.

Richie wasn’t stupid though. He knew once she was gone and he was alone in his room the voice was going to get louder and find other problems. He would be naïve if he believed his problems would be instantly solved by ‘true love’.

But he believed that with time and her help, he would learn to leave the voice as a background thought rather than letting it take the wheel. It was never going to disappear, but he would grow because of it.

The voice wasn’t audible now though, degrading the idea or telling him every bad scenario that would happen if he told the girl he’d met hours earlier that she was filling him with a buzz he was unfamiliar with yet already addicted too. He would tell her that he would go as far as to say this day has made him smile bigger and laugh harder than any day at the quarry or highscore at the arcade.

He thinks its insulting to think let alone say that about his friends, but he’s aware that these emotions could just be some curse she’s put on him. Right now though, he’s thankful for the curse.

Richie says her name so softly his lips hardly move, but she perks up instantly and meets his eyes and asks him what he needs.

A door opens and the sound of rain fills the house and rings in his ears. It’s suddenly cold like the fire has suddenly turned to ice. The unfamiliar voice of an adult calls out in greeting followed by echoing footsteps. Everything slows down to a haze around Richie Tozier.

The moment is interrupted. The chance is taken away that spent 60 minutes in the making.

The hour is over.

Part three is already being planned, along with a forth and possibly fifth installment. I am very pleased an idea I assumed would be a one-shot has become a min-fic due to my current inspiration.

Thank you to the lovely people who not only made me smile because of their nice words but also requested a second part. xxo

@broken-pieces @oliolioxiclean @capxls @carlotochi @flickerflies @stay-in-yo-lane-bitch-8675 @captain–americanna @sleepyrichie

My apologies if I missed/miss tagged someone. This was not aimed to be annoying, just a thank you.

#richie #richie tozier #richie x reader #richie tozier imagine #richie tozier x reader #writing #it #it 2017 #it 2017 imagine #richie fanfiction #richie tozier fanfiction #richie tozier fanfic #richie fanfic #richie x female reader #richie tozier x female reader #richie x self-insert #richie tozier x self-insert #richie x y/n #richie tozier x y/n

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