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whereianonymouslypostfics · 11 months

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The Flip Side Part 1

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x reader

Word count: ~9.7k

Summary: Your motivation to continue working as a mobster in Chicago is dwindling after the birth of your daughter.

A/N: Here it is. The basically flipped script where Y/n is a mob boss and Wanda’s our adorable, lovable civilian. Overall this story has darker themes than the first one. There are a lot of references to alcoholism, violence, death, and past physical/emotional abuse. I’ll put warnings for each part, but if any of this makes you uncomfortable, please don’t read!

Warnings: angst, references to alcoholism, suggestive content, domestic fluff (assume the first two will always be present unless stated otherwise)

The sound of Wanda’s screams reverberating off of the walls made you feel like you were crawling out of your skin. You hated to hear her sound so in pain, and knowing that she truly was made it even worse. You’d spent months, maybe longer trying to mentally prepare yourself for this day, and you truly never got to the point where you felt like you were ready. It was near agony having to just sit and watch and wait as Wanda did all of the work to bring your daughter into the world.

You and Wanda had wanted to have a baby since the day you got married. Honestly Wanda had wanted one earlier than that. She had always wanted to be a mom, and even though the foster dogs that ran around the penthouse counted as children, she wanted a baby. You’d been on board with the idea, but of course you couldn’t commit to it right then and there. A lot of preparation was required before you could feel ready to have a child. You needed to be at least a little more stable at work, and this was honestly the most time-consuming part of it all. Wanda had understood and you’d slowly done what was necessary to make sure you weren’t so front and center. You’d delegated until you felt like everything was out of your hands and you had very little control over it, but nearly three years later the day had arrived.

The equally important part of preparing for a baby that you conveniently had forgotten was arguably the most important. As you held your wife’s hand and tried to soothe her through labor, you realized that you hadn’t given being a parent more than the occasional thought. You knew that Wanda was over the moon and she was dying to meet your baby, but you were still a little nervous. You wanted this too, you hadn’t just agreed to make Wanda happy, but you’d forgotten how much pressure you would be putting on yourself by having a child with Wanda.

You feared every day that something would happen to her because of what you did, and you did everything you could to make sure she was safe. You had her tailed wherever she went, and you had gotten her to agree to being tracked in the least invasive way possible. You knew that Wanda tolerated it because she loved you, but you couldn’t help but want to put her and this baby on lockdown until the unforeseeable future. The idea of bringing your daughter into a world where she’s already at risk because of your less than legal occupation was terrifying. However, you’d agreed to this and now it was up to you to do your part and make things as safe as possible for your family.

“Y/n!”

You jerk away from whoever rudely shoved you awake, and you’re quickly reaching for your gun before you can stop yourself. You see Bucky out of the corner of your eye holding up his hands in surrender as he shoots you a look.

“Woah, it’s just me! Don’t shoot unless you want to drive yourself home.”

You frown as his words register and your hand drops from your hip as you sigh in exhaustion. You hadn’t meant to fall asleep here. You were supposed to be finishing up work before leaving on time to make it to dinner with your wife and child. It was mostly with your wife, but your now-6-month-old would be there, and you’re sure that Pietro would be as well.

You only take a second to wonder why you’d dream about Natalya’s birth of all things before you climb to your feet. You look around lazily for your phone and keys, and you curse when you see the missed calls from Wanda.

“She asked me to check up on you. You told her you’d be home earlier.”

You can’t help but groan in annoyance at yourself as you nod and follow Bucky out of the room. You had been swamped at work as usual, and as soon as you’d come back from an exhausting meeting this afternoon, you’d fallen asleep at your desk. You only cast a cursory glance at the mess you’re leaving before patting your friend on the back with a smile.

“Wanda’s cooking my favorite tonight. Do you want to join us?”

You have a feeling you know what his answer will be, but you wait until he tells you for certain that he’ll be busy tonight. You nod in understanding before following the brunette to your car. You sigh heavily as you get into the passenger seat and you close your eyes as you wait for Bucky to join you. He does quickly but he doesn’t start the car immediately as he turns to you with a frown.

You’d been really tired recently, and more so than when Natalya was born. Those first few months had been tough. You’d been sleep-deprived and as a result moodier than usual which wasn’t good for anyone. You’d wanted to drink more during this time than you had in the past 5 years, but you held off and tried to just find as much joy in having a young child at home as possible. Wanda had managed it a little better because she was able to take off work completely since she owned her restaurant, and she dedicated herself to her baby 24/7 for nearly 5 months. It wasn’t until recently that she started to talk about returning to work even if just part-time as Natalya got older.

Since your daughter had started sleeping a little longer at night, you’d recently had the luxury of sleeping through most nights. Despite having the nursery right down the hall, and enough baby monitors to start a store of your own, you’d been able to get more sleep recently now that Natalya’s gotten older.

So Bucky wasn’t sure what was going on with you. He hoped that you were just adjusting to everything still, or trying to figure out how to deal with the latest fire at work.

For the past 10 years, you’d been the head of one of Chicago’s oldest mobs. Your rise to power had been a treacherous one that included 2 assassination attempts, and multiple trips to the hospital as you tried to establish a name for yourself among a sea of misogynistic criminals. After being thrown to the wolves and proving your worth, you’d continued to build your wealth and reputation as you expanded your reach throughout the city. It had been the most difficult thing you’d ever done, and the stress alone had surely taken years off your life.

However, when you started drinking barely a few months into your reign, things became ugly quickly. You’d already learned to overcompensate for the fact that you were a woman by being more ruthless than your male counterparts. You’d killed too many people to count by the time you turned 23, and you’d turned to drinking and briefly drugs to deal with the stress and guilt that you brought upon yourself by staying with the mob.

You’d somehow made friends still, and they became loyal and eventually cared about you enough to try and help you beyond their loosely defined job requirements. You’d refused rehab and tried to handle things yourself, and that went about as poorly as it could have. You ended up in the hospital sick, and you’d eventually given up and started drinking again.

A few months later Pietro came to you asking for a job, and since you had a need for more employees and he looked strong enough you’d given him one. It wasn’t until you met his sister months later that you regretted this.

“Are you alright?”

You turn to Bucky in surprise, not realizing that you haven’t left yet as you drifted off. You shake your head before realizing what his question was, and quickly nodding instead.

“Yeah, I’m good. I’m just tired…and hungry.”

Bucky smiles and accepts this answer for now as he starts the car up to get you home. You own a number of properties around the city that you’ve either been gifted or overtaken by force that you utilized on a daily basis. One of these included a modern high rise apartment building that you lived in with Wanda and your daughter. There were an obscene number of floors, 42 you think, and the very top is where your penthouse sits. You and Wanda moved there shortly after getting married, and it’s since been renovated and re-renovated before its final modification right before your baby arrived.

You had way too many rooms for any three people to use, and honestly a good number of them were for your dogs.

When you first met Wanda, you had two German Shepherds that had been given to you by a business partner. It was the first time someone had given you a living thing, well at least that you accepted, and you couldn’t help but be wary. They’d been puppies at the time and they were now both close to 10 and they spent most of their days lounging around the penthouse or very occasionally going to the exercise room you had built for them. Given the fact that you were so high up and dreaded the idea of taking your dogs out multiple times a day, you’d had the rooftop outfitted with an area where the dogs could do their business and have it cleaned regularly by someone else.

Most of the rooftop you’d kept for yourself and Wanda to enjoy whenever the urge struck. However, given how busy you were and the fact that Wanda spent every waking minute with your daughter, trips to the roof were going to be far and in-between for a while.

When Bucky leaves you to probably continue working for a bit, you step into the private elevator that will take you up to your home. You slouch against the wall as you watch yourself go up and up through the large window across from you. You’d flirted with the idea of making it completely glass, but you honestly weren’t a fan of heights. Usually you had someone to talk to and distract you from slight nausea or at least a phone in your hand so you could studiously ignore it. Today, you had neither because you couldn’t muster the energy to take out your phone, so you just stared blankly at the brief view of city lights and the darkening sky.

When the elevator dings signaling that you’ve finished your journey, you stand up straight and put on a smile for your wife who hopefully won’t be too upset with you.

“You’re late.”

You walk into your 6-bedroom 9-bath penthouse and immediately sigh in relief. You’re such an introvert that the mere act of walking into your house recharges your social battery, at least a little bit. You walk down the short hallway that leads to the kitchen and living room, and you’re not surprised to see your wife cooking in the kitchen while your brother-in-law’s in the living room with your daughter. You smile at the sight of them before you go to greet your wife first.

“I know, I’m sorry. I fell asleep.”

You don’t give Wanda much time to respond before you pull her in for a hug as you kiss her. You hear and ignore Pietro’s disgusted noise as you take a moment to look at your wife closely. She’s wearing comfortable clothing and her hair is thrown up into a ponytail as she cooks. Her face is bare of makeup, but she’s still the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen. You kiss her cheek again before giving her one last squeeze as you look to the dinner she’s made.

“Thank you for making my favorite.”

Wanda’s gaze darts to where her brother’s holding her daughter up in the air while making strange noises before she looks to you with a small smile.

Wanda offers a slightly pained smile as you squeeze her tightly, but you’re quick to notice and can’t help but frown. You loosen your hold on her before looking for any obvious injury that you might have missed.

“What is it? What’s wrong?”

“It’s fine. I’m just a little sore.”

You frown before humming in understanding. Wanda had just stopped breastfeeding a little while ago, and despite starting Natalya on formula and somewhat solid food at this point, she still hadn’t dried up. You’ve read a lot about it and Wanda’s spoken with her doctor, but it sounds like it could be a while before she stops producing and therefore stops being so sore. They were told that if it’s longer than a week, she could be started on some medication to stop it.

“I’m sorry, love. Is there anything I can do?”

Wanda smiles at you but mutters a ‘later’ under her breath as she looks back to her brother. You nod with a smirk before you kiss her cheek once more as you head to the living room to greet the rest of your family.

“Hi there, Little Nat. How was your day?”

Despite not spewing more than a few short sounds that vaguely resemble words, you still talk to your daughter as if she understands you. It’s hard not to when you talk to your dogs the same way, but apparently it was encouraged. Pietro lowers your baby so you can take her into your arms and kiss her forehead. You smile wider when she laughs happily as you squish her belly and start to tickle her. You bounce her on your lap, content to just hold her as you turn to your brother-in-law.

“Pietro. I hope she was good for you today.”

Pietro Maximoff, your wife’s twin, was the one you’d met first all those years ago. He’d been desperate for money, and a little reckless but you’d seen potential in him. You’d had him assigned as your security detail to see what he was capable of, but he never got beyond that. Despite liking him well enough and trusting him to be loyal, you’d quickly decided that he wasn’t going to be working for you once you met his sister.

You remember that night like it had happened just the other day. You’d been ridiculously stressed about a deal that was falling through, and you’d had plans to blow off some steam. You’d called on Pietro because he was going to escort you to the party, but once you realized that he’d been followed you had a change of heart.

You still occasionally apologized to Wanda for trying to shoot her at your first meeting, but you both know that this night changed your lives for the better. You’d immediately been drawn to her and in a few short weeks you were dating, and Pietro was fired.

He held it against you for a while, but at this point you were pretty sure he was glad to be out of the mob. He certainly saw the hours you worked and how it drained the life from you, but he was your brother-in-law, and he made it his job to give you a hard time every now and then.

“She was an angel. Even as she threw her grapes around.”

You sigh at the thought of this and how Nat’s not been doing a great job during her transition to solid food. Well, she was doing fine you supposed since she was eating more than she was throwing, but it was more of a game right now to her and she mostly drank her formula and picked at the fruits and vegetables she liked. Apparently, grapes were not on that list. You nod before asking the follow up question that you are reminded of as you hear the sounds of dog collars clinking down the hall.

“Did any of the fur creatures clean up after her?”

Pietro just laughs before he shakes his head and looks to the new arrivals that finally realized you were home. You smile at the two in front, your jack Russell mixes who hurry over to you with little yips. You reach out to pet their scruffy coats before kissing their heads as they jump up on you.

“Hello Rudy. Milo. How are you?”

The duo just pants happily before sniffing Nat and walking away. They aren’t super interested in her which is good and bad, but you’ll just have to keep a close eye on them like the vet and pediatrician said. The next dogs that come up are your two old shepherds that you swear are walking slower every day. You smile lovingly at them before you silently ask Pietro to take your daughter so you can greet the larger dogs.

Boone and Rogue were your 10-year-olds who you’d had since they were barely a pound. You loved them dearly and watching them grow older broke your heart. You remember the days where they’d follow you around as you worked, intimidating people and keeping you company. They’d saved your ass a few times when you were outnumbered and having to retire them a couple of years ago felt like the end of an era. You didn’t replace them because you didn’t need to at this point, but you made sure that they would be comfortable and happy staying in the penthouse for the rest of their days.

They had access to almost all of the rooms and they could go out on the roof whenever they wanted to sun, but most of the time they just slept. You scratch the pair and kiss both of their heads with a sigh. You let them greet their human sibling with a sniff or two before you get to your feet with a groan.

“Dinner time?”

You meant for you, but you felt bad when the dogs perked up excitedly at the prospect of food. After confirming that Wanda had taken care of feeding them, you only give them a little extra before setting the table and helping Wanda finish up in the kitchen. You can tell that she’s tired which isn’t new, but she’s also being quieter than you’re used to. You worry that something’s on her mind, and she just doesn’t want to talk about it with her brother here.

You of course insist he stays for dinner because he’s already here and he does so much for the two of you. Since Nat was born, he’d stopped working and was around for whatever was needed. He helped his sister take care of Little Nat while you were at work, and when your wife had run by the restaurant to check in, he’d stay to supervise. You wondered if he’d stay here full-time once Wanda went back to work, but that was something you could figure out later.

“I went by the restaurant today.”

You look up from your plate as Wanda says this and you smile when you see how happy she looks. She loved that place and you swore that as soon as she was old enough, Natalya was going to learn to cook there. It would become her new home away from home if Wanda had anything to say about it. As exciting as this sounds, for now, you focus on the present as Wanda tells you about how everyone is doing in her absence.

“Stella says that the new kids are doing well, and there haven’t been any fires since that first time.”

You smile at this for two reasons. One because when Wanda says ‘kids’, she really means anyone younger than her. The brunette isn’t anywhere close to old, but you swear that once she passed 30, she just started calling anyone younger than her ‘kids’. The two 21- and 24-year-olds that she’s talking about were hired just before she went on maternity leave. They were going to help in the kitchen and Wanda had taken a week to run them through all of the items on the menu until they knew how to make each one. They’d done a fantastic job and Wanda was going to keep them on even as she slowly started working again.

You’re glad to hear that she’s happy with how things are going at the restaurant and you’re about to say this when Pietro speaks up. You look to where he’s trying to feed Nat with a spoon, but she’s more interested in looking at what’s on the floor around her high chair.

“And how’s Bridget doing?”

Both you and your wife roll your eyes in unison at the predictable question. Pietro, despite being freer than either of them, hasn’t made an appearance at the restaurant for a while. He’d had a slightly awkward breakup with one of the hostesses that worked there and he’d been avoiding it like the plague. Wanda was annoyed because she’d warned him not to get involved with someone she worked with, but he hadn’t listened. He’d found it difficult to say no to this redhead’s…charms.

“I was very nice to her sestra. Just ask.”

“She wasn’t there today, and even if she was, I wouldn’t tell you. You weren’t very nice to her.”

You just watch in amusement as you wife chastises her brother about his failed relationship. It had honestly ended amicably, but it hadn’t lasted long because Pietro hadn’t been looking for something serious, and Bridget had wanted to settle down. Luckily, work wasn’t awkward for anyone and it only got a little dicey if Pietro showed up and tried to show off in one way or another.

The two start to argue in their native language and you just smiled as you picked up bits and pieces of it. Wanda wasn’t being very complimentary of her brother, and if you weren’t mistaken Pietro was being lewd. As usual. You sigh as you abandon your mostly finished dinner and get up so you can try and feed your daughter. Pietro’s mostly given up at this point, but you sit down beside her with a smile before picking up a clean spoon.

“Hi little one. This food tastes better than what’s on the ground. I promise.”

You scoop a little spoonful of it out of the bowl and hold it up to Natalya. She looks at you with a smile, but makes no move to try to eat, so you move to another tactic. You start to move the spoon around in an aimless pattern, pretending like you’re flying a plane and although it gets your daughter’s attention she’s still not interested in eating. You eventually give up and boop her on the nose before reaching out to try and clean her shirt. You’ll never admit this out loud, but she reminds you of yourself when she eats. She’s so enthusiastic that she sometimes gets more of it on her than in her mouth. At least she has the excuse of being a baby. You’re just guilty of being overzealous.

You don’t realize that the twins are done arguing and have switched to watching you try to tempt Nat into eating. After cleaning up the mess Nat made, you move her food aside before handing her one of her toys that was out of reach. You let her chew on it because it was sanitized right before dinner and you smile as she laughs happily between gumming the rubber ring.

“You’re such a cutie.”

You’re back in your seat and intent on finishing dinner when you realize that Wanda and Pietro are just watching you. You shoot them curious looks but Wanda just smiles before she takes a sip of her water with a shake of her head.

“Nothing, detka. You two are just cute.”

You sigh inaudibly at this but don’t argue even when Pietro looks at you with a smug smile. You focus on finishing your dinner as conversation about the restaurant continues. Pietro is the one who asks if Wanda will be returning soon, and she says that over the next two weeks she plans to go in a couple more times. You two had briefly talked about this but you hadn’t realized she’d made a decision until now. You’re glad that she’s not trying to rush things because although you know that she loves her work, you selfishly want her hidden away in the safety of your home.

While Wanda’s been with you, both before and after getting married, there are only been a few instances when someone has tried to come after her. It was on days where you were out late working, or you had a sudden change of plans. They hadn’t gotten too close either time, but even someone stalking Wanda was too close for you. These incidents are partially why you’d moved here and tried to make it as secure as possible. You knew short of building yourself and fortress that you demanded she stay in 24/7, there was no way to guarantee her safety. You just did your best by putting your best people by her side and making sure that you had multiple ways of tracking and communicating with her if necessary.

Your wife was very tolerant of all of this because she’d seen first-hand what happens to people who try to hurt someone you love. Although she knows it’s necessary to keep her safe, she wants to do everything she can to spare you from having to kill someone. It’s one of the many downsides of your job, and probably her least favorite, but asserting your authority by eliminating threats is something that you have to do often. She never wants to know how much time you spend a day torturing or killing people, but she can always tell when you come home at night how difficult your day was.

Whether you don’t bother to take off your jacket and shoes, or you look like you’d seen a ghost, she can tell that your work had been particularly rough on you.

She wonders how long you’ll want to do this, and if you have a backup plan for your next chapter. She knows that 10 years is a long time to be in something, and you can’t just leave it. Even if it was something else, like a desk job, she’s sure you’d have to plan your next step and take some time before making any changes. She’s not naïve enough to think that even if you wanted to leave, if you decided to, it would be easy. She’d seen you as you tried to take a step back from it all while she was trying to get pregnant. It had taken a toll on you and she still sometimes sees that you’re facing the backlash of your difficult decisions.

As much as she wanted to have this baby with you, she didn’t want the decision to make things more difficult for you.

Her desire to make your life as easy as possible is why she’s only going to go to the restaurant occasionally for the next month before steadily increasing her shifts until she’s working full time again. She knows that Pietro would be willing to watch Natalya until she was old enough for school, but she wanted him to go back to work too if he wanted it.

He’d started working with your friend Tony a few years ago, and despite not understanding the ins and outs of the technology he worked with, he enjoyed learning and getting to spend time with someone who was more similar to him than a 6-month-old was. This was a conversation for later though because as dinner finished up, Wanda realizes that you’re fading fast. You’d had a long day and you could probably sleep right now, despite your nap earlier. After exchanging a look with her brother, Wanda gets up and starts to clear the table.

“Oh no, wait. I’ll do it.”

The rule is that whoever cooks doesn’t clean, and this is something that you’ve stuck to even on your worst days. You actually didn’t mind cleaning because it was a very mindless, almost cathartic activity. Wanda smiles at you before she takes the stack of plates she has toward the kitchen.

“I know, I’m just bringing them to the kitchen for you while you get Natalya’s dishes.”

You obediently stand up and stack the tiny bowls and spoons before grabbing your daughter with your free hand. You hold her on your hip as you lead her to the kitchen to see the mess that you get to clean.

“Look Nat! Look at all the food, Mommy made. She’s going to teach you how to cook this as soon as you can hold your own spoon.”

Wanda rolls her eyes as she sets the dishes down by the sink, but she doesn’t deny it as she swoops in and steals her daughter. You smile and watch as she takes the baby into the living room. She leaves you to your dishes and Pietro returns from letting the dogs back in now that dinner’s over before settling on the couch.

“Come here, milaya. Let’s go play.”

You’re putting the last few dishes in the dishwasher when your phone rings from where you left it on the counter. You jump slightly at the jarring sound and you sigh as you dry your hands off before reaching for it. You don’t notice Wanda’s frown or Pietro’s look as you answer Bucky’s call with a sigh.

“Hey, Bucky. What’s up?”

You close the dishwasher and set the two pots that Wanda used aside to dry as you hold your phone to your ear. You listen to your friend tell you about what you’re hoping doesn’t ruin the rest of your night. Right before leaving ‘the office’ you’d made sure that everything was set for the hit that you had planned tonight against yet another politician that was trying to interfere with your business. He was trying to get legislation passed that would crack down on drugs in the city, and not only could that potentially ruin you but it would drive the prices of everything through the roof. You didn’t want to deal with that and you honestly didn’t mind taking this route to get ahead of the problem. When reading about the target you’d found that he wasn’t the most upstanding guy, and very few people except maybe his mistress and their kid would miss him.

“What do you mean he can’t make it? Did he double book himself?”

You try to keep your voice down and your anger under wraps as Bucky tells you about the flaky hitman you’d talked to about an hour ago. Apparently, he wasn’t available anymore and not only did that make him the newest addition to your list, but it left you in an awkward position. You weren’t sure who you could find to take his place so last minute. Glancing at the clock on the oven you realize that it was less than an hour before the hit was supposed to take place. You groan under your breath as you consider your options before you ask Bucky what he’d do.

Bucky has been your friend for a long time and you’d worked together for almost the entire time. You know that he always has a plan D while you occasionally get stuck on plan C. In this case, you want to hear what he thinks the best course of action is for this. You’d already had everything in place. His $300k, his spot on the guest list, and a getaway car were all waiting for him. Now, he’d be lucky if he sees tomorrow.

“What do you think, Bucky?”

You wait as your friend tells you exactly what you’d been thinking, but been reluctant to agree to. Not only was it risky, but it was going to cost you a lot more money that you didn’t currently have to throw around. You’d have to talk to Yelena to see if she could move her collection day up to tomorrow instead of later this week. That said, you didn’t expect to be able to cover this bill with that alone. You resist the urge to knock something off the counter top as Bucky gives you the bad news.

“Nat could do it, but you know her fee and I think she’s busy with a deal of her own at the moment.”

You head over to the fridge to look for something you know you won’t find before you take a deep breath. You know Nat is busy, she’s working on getting you drugs that you’d been promised last week. You couldn’t take her from that right now, not if you wanted to pay your employees on time. You reach for the leftover cake from Natalya’s half-year birthday and set it on the counter. You make the mistake of glancing up to see if your wife and Pietro were paying attention to you.

They’re watching you with very different expressions that make you feel equally ashamed and frustrated. Pietro’s eyeing you suspiciously because even after everything you’d done to get better, to prove to him and yourself that you’re doing better, he can’t completely trust you. You suppose you can’t blame him. You want to credit his reluctance to his brotherly duty to keep Wanda’s best interests in mind. He doesn’t want her hurt again, especially now that you have Natalya to take care of, and you don’t think he’ll ever forget how much you hurt her.

Whether intentional or not, a lot of the first year of your relationship had been hell for Wanda. You’d still been drinking and you had no control over your temper. You’d been acting so impulsively and recklessly for years that it had been difficult to just shut it off because of Wanda’s presence in your life. She’d suffered the consequences of your late nights, your random disappearances and your benders, but she’d still stayed. A lot had to happen for her to stick with you, but she did it and the idea of putting her through anything like that again wasn’t acceptable to Pietro in the least.

Wanda watches you with a worried frown as she tries to keep her baby from squirming in her arms. She knows it’s a work call because no one else would reach out at this time, and seeing how you tense and sound angry almost immediately, she realizes this isn’t good news. She waits to see what you decide and she would be lying if she said she’s not saying a little prayer that you don’t leave her tonight to do who knows what.

“She can’t miss that; we need the money.”

You bite your lip as you consider plan C. It’s not great, and you hate that you’re even considering it, but you’re running low on time. You grab a fork and start to eat the cake in front of you mindlessly. You’re not even hungry, but you need to do something with your hands that isn’t punching a hole in the wall.

“What about Steve?”

Steve had been part of your security detail early on because of a few reasons. The first was his experience. He’d been in the military before coming to Chicago, and he was a real asset that you’d been grateful to have. You’d met him and Bucky at the same time, and despite his intimidating stature, he was a kind and dependable friend that you trusted with your life. The other reason he was with you was because he was a crack shot. On the rare occasion that he wasn’t busy or watching over your wife which was the primary task you’d given him, he would help you with loose ends. If the situation called for it, much like tonight’s did, he’d off someone for you. He did it for free even if you ended up paying him anyway for his trouble, but he was one of the most efficient people in your employ.

The only issue with having him do something like this for you was that he was easily recognized at this point. Despite his best efforts and yours to keep him incognito, it was impossible for him to go completely undetected, and people knew what he looked like now. He was recognized by many, and only kept out of jail because of a deal you had with a corrupt judge. You’d negotiated his freedom upon certain terms, and these included not letting him commit crimes, especially murder.

You don’t know what to do. Short of going after Jacobs yourself, you aren’t sure who you can ask to infiltrate the party that starts in 20 minutes and get in and out without being caught.

Bucky is on the same page as you and he sighs deeply as he decides on what to do. He had a couple of things he needed to finish up tonight, but those could wait for a bit. He was privy to the original plan and he was less recognizable than Steve, so he could give it a shot.

“I’ll do it.”

You’re shaking your head as you drop your fork and give up trying to distract yourself. You walk out of the kitchen without a word and step into the closest room with a door. You take a deep breath as you look into the mirror in front of you and cringe at your appearance. You look like shit which is honestly not a surprise considering how shitty you feel. You’re tired, anxious, and now sick to your stomach as you realize what you have to do. You’re not going to let Bucky off the hook completely, but you don’t want him going after Jacobs tonight. It’s not worth the risk, and you’d like to know more about why this happened in the first place. It couldn’t be because someone was so bold that they thought they could change their minds and refuse you. The mere thought makes you want to scream, but you just take another deep breath before finally responding.

“No, Buck. We’ll just wait on it. For now, I’d like you to find Logan for me and keep him somewhere safe until I can see him. I have a few questions.”

Bucky agrees to have this done by morning and you hang up with a disappointed sigh. This is just not your day.

“Y/n, are you okay in there?”

You turn at the sound of your wife’s voice and you nearly curse yourself again for being so broody. You are certain she’s a little on edge because she always is when it comes to your business. She hated when you brought work home, honestly you both did, but sometimes you couldn’t help it. The last time it happened you’d had to leave in the wee hours and not only did Wanda hate having you leave her, but she knew that whatever got you out of bed at this time wasn’t anything good. She’d learned during your time together that delegation was a double-edged sword. It freed you up to do other more important things, like be home with her while staying out of danger, but it also made your anxiety near unbearable depending on what the problem was.

Wanda had learned how to help you manage this through the years of therapy you’d had. She’d helped you avoid replacing one bad habit with another, and encouraging you to focus on something positive is what she was attempting to do now.

You open the door to the bathroom to see Wanda standing there with Nat in her arms. Your daughter was smiling widely as she swatted Wanda’s hair with her grabby hands. You couldn’t help but smile and you reached out for her with a sigh. You kissed her face a few times until she giggled before turning your attention to your wife with a shake of your head.

“No everything’s going to hell, but it will work itself out.”

Wanda is surprised by how relaxed you sound, or rather resigned. She would have thought you’d start cursing and threaten to murder someone, but instead the majority of your focus is on your daughter who despite enjoying herself is starting to get sleepy. You kiss her forehead one more time before you start heading for her bedroom.

“Is it bedtime little one?”

Wanda follows behind you as you head back through the living room to get to Natalya’s nursery. Pietro’s still sitting in the living room but when he sees you, he stands up before looking to his sister. You don’t bother worrying about what they’re deciding as you stop just long enough to see what your brother-in-law’s plans are.

“Thank you again for today. I’m going to put this one to bed.”

Pietro only hesitates for a second before Wanda nods and he decides that he can leave. He, just like Bucky and Steve, lives on the floor just beneath them so they’re nearby if needed. Not to mention they live rent free. Pietro hugs his sister before telling her to call her if she needs anything before he leaves for his own apartment. He’ll be back tomorrow depending on if his sister goes to work, but for now he can tell she’s only worried about her wife.

“What story do you want to read tonight, Little Nat?”

Although she’s too young to understand what you’ll read, just the act of talking to her is good practice for her later months. You also like to tell yourself that hearing your voice will help her recognize you even if you’re gone often. You feel bad that you’re not very present, but you’re trying to do better, and you’ll be damned if you’re here for a bedtime and you don’t tell Nat a story.

You set her down and give her a moment to settle in her crib before you start to look through her books. They’re mostly picked out for when she’s older, closer to 1.5 or 2 years old, but you love these stories and want your daughter to know them. You start to grab the Yertle the Turtle book when Wanda steps in and sits beside you with a smile.

“You read that one two nights ago, detka. I think she’ll have it memorized soon.”

You smile widely at the thought and you go to open the book anyway before you look to your wife with a thoughtful hum.

“What would you have me read instead, Wands? Maybe the scary wolf book, or the sad fish who lost his scales?”

Wanda knows you like those books, but she forgoes the ‘traumatic’ books for one that might be your all-time favorite. She skims the bookshelf before finding it in the exact same place as last time. She pulls it out and hands it to you with a shrug.

“What about the one with all of the colorful animals.”

You can’t help but look interested in this one and you only hesitate for a second before exchanging your book for Wanda’s. You kiss her briefly in thanks before clearing your throat and opening the book. It isn’t until you check to see if your daughter is paying attention, that you realize that she’s already asleep. You chuckle under your breath before you close the book and set it aside with a sigh.

“Maybe tomorrow then.”

Wanda follows you to your bedroom once you make sure that Nat is truly asleep and good for you to leave alone. You make sure that your dogs are in their section of the penthouse before leading your tired wife to the bedroom. You know you’re going to have to talk about Bucky’s phone call, but for now you’d like to jump in the shower and rid yourself of today. When Wanda realizes what your intentions are she takes the baby monitor on the bedside table and holds it as you get changed.

“Would you like some company?”

Wanda rarely needs to ask, but you nod regardless as you shed your clothes and head into the bathroom with your wife on your heels. You let her get the monitor situated while you start the shower and get the hot water running. You sigh before you make sure that your wife is all set before reaching out for her. She shoots you a confused look, but you just bend slightly at the waist before asking dramatically.

“All ready, milady?”

Wanda rolls her eyes, but she takes your offered hand and lets you lead her into the shower. You adjust the water when you realize it’s too hot before letting Wanda lead the way and shutting the door behind her. You sigh in relief as the hot water sprays your sore muscles, and you shift slightly so you’re completely under the shower head. You open your eyes to see Wanda’s watching you as she reaches for the body wash, and you smile in anticipation as you hold out your hands.

“How are you feeling, my love?”

The brunette smiles as you start to lather her arms before carefully moving to her sore breasts. She groans before nodding slightly as she runs a hand through her wet hair with a smile. She hinted earlier that a massage might help, but she’d actually started earlier when you were on the phone and you can’t help but laugh at the image.

“I’m sure Pietro loved that.”

She slaps you playfully before emptying more of the sweet-smelling wash into her own hands so she can start to clean you up. She can tell you’re incredibly tense, and she wants to try and remedy this now if you’ll let her.

“He studiously ignored me and focused on Natalya.”

You smile widely at the thought of Pietro being such a good brother. You sigh once again as Wanda starts to squeeze your biceps as she runs her hands down your arms. You let your eyes fall closed as you let Wanda work her magic. You relax quickly and you have to remember to keep yourself standing upright as you feel the urge to lie down overtake you. Wanda has given you dozens of massages over the years, and it really was the only thing that could calm you down when you were stressed. Well, the only thing you were allowed to have. However, you realize that unfortunately as you get clean and calmer by the minute, this leaves you unprepared for what your wife asks you next.

“What did Bucky tell you earlier?”

You hesitate to answer and you contemplate pretending like you didn’t hear her, but the gentle squeeze she gives your side when a few seconds have passed in silence make this option less appealing. You sigh heavily as you think about your call with Bucky and how this was going to be a pain in the ass to replan. You don’t want to worry about this now. You just want to enjoy your time with your wife, but Wanda is asking you for something. You open your eyes and look down slightly at your wife who’s shooting you a curious look. You can tell that she’s worried and you feel badly about this, but there’s not much you can do about that other than reassure her that everything is fine. At least it’s not worse than it usual is.

“Something I had planned fell through and it’s going to be a bitch to reschedule.”

This was the most detail you would give Wanda, and you knew that she preferred it that way. She’d learned the extent of what you did only hours after meeting you. She remembers Google searching you and learning about all of the atrocities you’d committed and being afraid for her brother. He’d been working with you at the time, and she had correctly concluded that being anywhere near you put a target on him that Wanda was not happy about.

Once you started to care about what Wanda wanted, you made sure to fix this by firing him. He’d been mad at you, but making Wanda happy had overshadowed this and paved the way for you two to start dating.

Now not much has changed since Wanda first learned about what you did. The basics were the same. It was illegal and dangerous both physically and financially. You gambled a lot given how you trusted numerous people to do jobs for you, and sometimes they disappointed and you lost out. When things like that happened it was usually money you lost, but tonight you’d probably lost more than that depending on how successful Bucky ends up being.

“I’m sorry.”

It’s the only thing that Wanda can really say in response. She doesn’t ask for details. She certainly doesn’t want to know who you’d planned on killing tonight, so she offers you the only consolation she can. Once you’re both clean, you head back into the bedroom wrapped in towels as you look for your change of clothes. Wanda throws on a long t-shirt and you find a pair of shorts and a t-shirt before you slide under the covers.

“I’m so ready to sleep.”

You practically moan as you lie down on your very comfortable mattress and wait patiently for your wife to join you. As you look up at her, your gaze travels down to where her shirt stops mid-thigh and you can’t help but smile as you reach out to touch. Wanda settles on the bed before grabbing your hands to kiss them with a sigh. She lies down facing you and she looks you over carefully. The circles under your eyes are darker than usual and she can see your stress lines are more prominent as well. She can’t help herself and she squeezes your hands where she holds them to her chest with a sigh.

“How are you really feeling, detka?”

You expected this question much earlier, so you’re ready for it now even though you’re seconds away from sleep. You aren’t; however, prepared to see how softly Wanda’s looking at you. She’s only inches away from you and despite considering that she might think you’re buying your time, you lean forward and meet her lips for a kiss. She doesn’t respond immediately, but she doesn’t pull away so you take that as a win. You continue to kiss your wife, and your hands roam her body as you think about how to answer her.

You’re feeling as stressed as usual, but despite tonight’s hiccup you don’t think your mood is anything to worry about. You take your antidepressants and you do your best to focus on the good things in your life, like your family and friends, when you feel like lashing out at someone. You only crave a drink a couple times a week, but it’s manageable and you are still avoiding bars as much as possible.

You realize that this sounds way too rehearsed, but it honestly is just how you feel. You’re not sure if you’ll ever be able to relax with the job you have, and surely that’s a reason to rethink your occupation. You have a wife, and a child, you should be able to enjoy your time with them without having your mob responsibilities looming overhead.

You had to go to one last week to meet a client, and despite the fact that you just got water your nerves about this particular deal made watching him drink his Manhattan near unbearable. You’d gone home and immediately cuddled with your daughter, and if Wanda picked up on your weird behavior, she didn’t comment on it. She also didn’t comment on how you practically dragged her into bed later.

“Stress is a constant, but it’s not overwhelming.”

Wanda eventually just nods before she leans in to kiss you this time. You smile against her lips before you run your hands up under her shirt to graze her ribs. The resulting gasp makes you scoot even closer to your wife so you can tangle your legs with hers.

“I’m glad it’s not overwhelming you.”

You nod when Wanda says this and you mutter something in agreement, but your main focus is on your wife’s breasts. You are careful because she told you earlier that they were sore, but you can’t help but want to get your hands on them. Seeing how Wanda’s body changed was one of your favorite parts of her pregnancy. You’d been called a teenage boy for admitting it, but watching Wanda swell as your child grew in her made you insatiable. When the first trimester filled with sickness, cravings and poor sleep ended, you’d spent all your free time with your wife and a lot of it had been in bed. You think back on these times fondly, but you quickly return your focus to the present when your wife’s voice registers.

“Mhmm, it is.”

Wanda hisses and arches toward you slightly as you squeeze her breasts before slotting your leg between her thighs. You peek under the covers as you continue to push up your wife’s shirt and you can’t help but smile at what you see. You don’t think you’ll ever stop believing that your wife is the most beautiful woman in the world. As she lays beside you flushed and needy, you can’t help but want to spend hours appreciating the wonderful woman who gave you a beautiful, albeit sometimes exhausting daughter.

“You’re beautiful, Wands.”

You can’t help but smile as you break away from Wanda’s lips to kiss her neck. You feel her pulse quicken as you tease her heated skin with your teeth, and her grip on your arm tightens as she releases a breathy curse.

“Fuck, Y/n. You should really sleep.”

It came out as a question rather than a suggestion, but you still shake your head as you roll over so you’re hovering over your wife. She gasps again and you smile down at her as you carefully position yourself on top of her without moving your hands from her heaving chest.

“I feel great, Wands. Will you let me help you feel good?”

While that does sound appealing and the feeling of your hands on her sore breasts make her want to buck her hips, she’s hyperaware of your attention and it’s making her self-conscious. She knows that she’ll never have her pre-pregnancy body again. She’ll never be slim with a body free of stretch marks, and despite your insistence that she’s still perfect; that you don’t care about that, sometimes the voice in her head is louder than yours.

You know her well, and you can sense that her hesitation is due to her insecurity. It also helps that Wanda’s becomes tense beneath you as she squirms uncomfortably and you have to keep yourself from sighing in disappointment. Instead, you lean over to kiss your wife gently before your hands start to drift down her sides. She jumps slightly as you expected, but they keep wandering until they fall to her hips.

“I know I can say it until you’re sick of hearing me talk, but I love you so much. Do you know that?”

Wanda shifts to help you push her shirt up and off despite wanting to stay hidden. She curses when she feels lips against her breasts, and you wait until you feel her relax a little before moving down to her stomach.

“Well, I do, Wands. I love everything about you.”

Your hands squeeze her hips before you press a kiss against your wife’s tummy rolls. She’d lost most of the weight she’d been carrying with Natalya already, but she still had a little left that she’s not sure she’ll ever shed. Given how busy she is with Natalya and how exhausted she feels by the end of the day, there’s not time for any exercise. She doesn’t count running around while she takes care of her daughter, or the work out you occasionally give her in the bedroom.

Tonight’s not going to be one of those nights though because she can already tell by how tenderly you’re kissing her stretch marks, that you’re just trying to make her feel better. She feels herself relax under your touch, and after a few minutes she releases a tired sigh, and with it some of her anxieties. She reaches down to bury her hands in your hair with a smile. You look up at her from where you’ve rested your head with a smile.

“Thank you, detka. I feel better already.”

You smile wider before reaching for one of Wanda’s hands and kissing it with a questioning look. You’re nearly falling asleep as your muscles continue to ache in protest of your continued consciousness. You need to go to bed soon since you have an early morning, but you need to make sure your wife’s feeling better first. You hate that you may have stressed her out, and you want to fix it if at all possible.

“I’m glad to hear it, but is there anything else I can do to help you relax?”

Wanda smirks at you as she runs her hands through your hair carefully. You haven’t put it up yet, and she loves seeing it unkempt and wild like you are. She can see you’re fading but you’re watching her carefully and she knows that doing anything but telling you the truth will get her in trouble. She sighs as she shifts so she’s more comfortable against her pillow. Wanda meets your gaze with a teasing look that immediately makes you perk up. You’re never one to back down from a challenge.

“You can either hurry up and finish what you started, or you can come up here so we can sleep.”

You smile widely as you move up your wife’s body to kiss her deeply. She moans against your lips and is just short of pushing you away from her when you break the kiss with a sigh. You slide back down the bed before moving to sit between Wanda’s legs. You move so you’re where you need to be before teasing her with your fingers along her inner thighs.

“I’ll make it quick, baby.”

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