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solarnomoon · 9 months

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get a guitar - lee heeseung

your boyfriend every third thursday/best friend not boyfriend/(not-so) secret crush, heeseung, gets a little too tipsy for you.

pairing >>> heeseung x male reader

tags >>> college au, alcohol consumption, confessing feelings???, misunderstanding, slight angst, fluff, comfort, (not super) drunk hee, suggestive content

author's note >>> i have a few things to say. first, this was inspired by drunk heeseung hello he's adorable ･ﾟ･(｡>ω<｡)･ﾟ･ and second, i rly liked riize's debut song! and ik, it's supposed to be fun and innocent, but it's fun to think there's more to it!

the rattling of your bedside table was not uncommon for you to be awakened by, but was what uncommon was the fact that as you open your eyes to silence your phone from the blasting alarm, there was no light that peered through the curtains, causing you to groan at being woken up so early.

you reach for your phone and see who dared to wake you from your slumber, and after your eyes adjusted to the bright light, you immediately pick up seeing sunghoon’s name. you figured it was important as sunghoon has never once called you, the reason being as he hates calling and only texts, dms, hell, even replies on twitter.

“hello?”

“h-hey y/n!” the voice that rang through was not sunghoon, now keeping in mind that technically, sunghoon had still never rung you. “what’s going oonnn!”

it’s not like you didn’t recognize the voice though, “sunoo? not much, but it’s fucking… 1:30 in the morning, what’s up?” you slowly sit up, rubbing your eyes after flipping the on switch for your ambient lamp next to you.

“heyy, so, basically we all went out as you know, and oh em gee, you have to look at the pictures we took, they are SO funny…” you hear someone else’s voice in the background to tell him to focus, whom you can only assume is jay. “sorrryyy, anyway we called because your little lover boy over here is like, a little like, too fucked up.”

“heeseung? and he’s not my lover boy.”

“notice how i didn’t say a name~” the guy over the phone just giggles, you letting out a sigh after hearing that heeseung might’ve gotten himself in trouble. “anyway, his roommate has his fuckbuddy over, probably getting her pregnant. he’s so fucking irresponsible with condoms, agh, i hate him!” the sudden outburst from sunoo makes you snort, the love-hate relationship they have is probably one of the most entertaining things you’ve seen in a while.

“it’s okay, sun, tell me how much you hate ‘lix later.”

an audible gasp is heard through the phone, with sunoo adding, “ugh, i hate that you’re friends with that stupid australian!”

“felix is not a bad guy, sunoo, and you know this too.” you take this opportunity to tease him back, “plus, you’re just jealous that he’s not fucking you instead, don’t lie.”

“not the point y/n. the real point is, can seung stay at yours? i know your roommate is out for the weekend, and none of us have space for him.” he pauses for a few seconds, then jay tells him to ‘tell y/n the other thing!’ sunoo lets out a noise of agreement, then continues. “he also has been asking about you all night. like, i mean literally talking about you every moment of his life. so i think it’s time to just give him what he wants…”

“he’s been asking about me?”

“uhh, when is he not? seriously, when are you guys gonna get together?”

“you know he doesn’t like me like th-“

this time, sunoo lets out a sigh, interrupting your sentence. “i don’t wanna get into this with you, we’re coming to your dorm.”

“but i didn’t say you c-“ and with that, your dorm room opens wide open, with heeseung holding on to jay’s shoulder to keep himself up. “-ould come."

after jay puts him down onto your chair, sunoo and jungwon walk in the room as well, with jungwon giving you a wave while sunoo gives you a hug. "he's your responsibility now, y/n. we couldn't get him to go anywhere else to be honest..." jay admits, his hand reaching to the back of his neck.

"it's... fine, just go have fun and enjoy the rest of your night. i can take care of heeseung." at the sound of his name, the guy looks over to you, mouth forming a wide smile when he recognizes your face.

"hey you, just the man i was looking for!" heeseung stands up from the chair and practically jumps into your bed with you, hugging you by the waist while his lower body stays on the floor. you nod to the other three, signalling them to leave, with jungwon and jay giving you a sheepish smile. sunoo on the other hand just wiggles his eyebrows and does the "salt shaking" motion, then leaves with them, shutting the door behind him.

you place your hands on heeseung's head and angle his face as to look at him, immediately feeling the warmth of his cheeks. as he looks up at you, you notice that he has a natural red glow, presumably from the alcohol he had consumed. "jeez, how much have you drank?"

he puts his fingers into a pinch, "a little bit." he removes his other hand from your waist to match the pinch, "just a little, a little." he puts his hand into a motion as if he's drinking a cup, signaling to you that he drank (as if you didn't already know that...) "actually, i drank a little."

"yeah, heard you the first... and second... and third time, heeseung. do you want some water?" you lean over to your bedside table to grab your water bottle, but when you try to hand it to him, he pushes it away. "you don't want?"

"i only want it if you drink it first!" he grins at you, confidence filling his voice all of a sudden.

"dude, how can you drink it if i drink it?"

"easy, you just pour it from your mouth into mine."

"what are you fucking talking about?"

heeseung gets up from the floor and sits next to you, leaning over to have his head on your lap. "it would be really easy like this, you just pour it into your mouth and then drip it into mine..." he wraps his arms around your waist again, putting his face into your shirt. "or, you could just kiss me with the water in your mouth."

you thought you heard him wrong, with the fact that he muttered his last sentence into your shirt, but after asking him to repeat it, you realize that what you heard was what he said. "...heeseung, i thi-" a muffled whine interrupts your sentence, and for a second, your heart squeezes, nervous that whine was one out of pain (definitely not because you liked the way it sounded coming from him). "heeseung?"

another whine erupts from his mouth, but before you could ask again, he answers, "stop calling me that, y/n."

"dude, you know that's your name, right?"

the movement was so quick that you didn't even know his drunk self could manage it, but in the blink of an eye, the positions had changed to where you were sitting in his lap, his arms wrapped around your waist still, but his face laying on your back. "but that's not what you call me."

"what are you talking about, seungie?" and with that, you could literally feel the muscles on his face form a slight smile, his face pressing harder into your back. after that, he removed it, putting his lips oddly close to your neck.

"that's my boy, much better..." his lips graze the bottom of your ear, before moving to the side of your neck, planting a small kiss. "so much better."

the minute you felt his lips on your skin, your instinct was to push away, your pulse quickening, and the area on the back of your neck tingling like sparks. "hey, don't fucking do that!" you looked back to scold him, but the tiny pout on his face made you soften up. "just... you can't do that kind of shit... not when..." i'm practically in love with you, you had wanted to say, and although heeseung was drunk, you couldn't take that chance of him remembering in the morning and prematurely ruining the friendship.

you knew it was bound to happen. it was only a matter of time before he found out himself or your feelings had grown immense amounts to the point where you couldn't take it anymore. either way was a lose-lose situation, but even knowing this, you couldn't lose heeseung as a friend, or a sort of fake lover the way he had treated you.

in fact, it was how he had treated you that made this impossible. he clung to you like a fucking leech. you and him were rarely seen without the other, and everyone around knew that if you invited one, you had to invite the other.

he'd play stupid horror games on roblox late at night with you, running halfway across campus the minute you said you were too scared to continue, and he'd hold you in his arms as you slept until dawn.

he'd invite you to his dorm and watch rom-coms with all of your favorite snacks, ramen that he had cooked for both of you guys, and heated blankets, massaging your back as you watched together while you laughed at the stupid jokes, periodically asking you if those pick-ups lines would work if someone used them on you.

he'd pick you up to go to a fancy dinner date, paying for your entire meal, then afterwards, bring you on a drive to the scenic areas and talk deep conversations with you as you guys admitted shit you never had before, discussing innate and learned fears, future plans, and why the earth revolved around the sun.

if you guys were dating, heeseung would be the absolute perfect boyfriend. he brought you to theme parks, county fairs, arcades, family meetups, holidays, pretty much everywhere. you couldn't imagine life without him, he was a staple to your life, and everyone knew you guys were practically inseparable.

but you and heeseung weren't dating. you had done all of these things in the past few months out of pure best-friendcy. and yet, you didn't want to lose this intimacy with him.

"not when you what, y/n?" heeseung leans to the side so you could see his face, curiosity floating in his eyes as he gazes at you.

"...not when you're drunk, heeseung."

"i'm not fucking drunk. and didn't i tell you to stop calling me that? it doesn't sound right coming out of your mouth." heeseung strengthens his grip around you, pulling you closer into him, as if he let go, you would fall out of his life for good.

"heeseung, you have to let go, you drank too much and you don't know what you're doing," before you could even realize it, your voice had started raising in volume and desperation little by little, "and it's like this isn't normal best friend behavior and i feel like i'm trapped in this fucking bubble of keeping to myself because i don't want to ruin us but i can't just leave you because you're so fucking important to me and i just!" you hold your breath, not knowing what to say next. "i just think it's unfair..."

you didn't even realize you were crying until heeseung was wiping the tears away with his hands, leaving small kisses on the top of your head. "hey, hey, baby..." heeseung whispered, making you even angrier. you turn around in his lap, hitting his chest.

"heeseung! don't even fucking call me that right now! that's part of the problem, you don't call your best friend that! stop fucking playing with my feelings!" you then grab his shirt and cry into it, muttering the last part, "if you wanna play with something, play with that stupid fucking guitar you have, not me..."

he chuckles softly at your sentence, but before you scold him for laughing at a time like this, he gently presses his lips against yours, encapsulating you into a slow, loving kiss. instead of fighting back, you lean into him, allowing yourself to be taken by his soft lips, kissing back with just as gentle of pressure, not wanting to be overwhelmed by a feeling you have dreamed of since you met the man.

as he pulls away, he wipes the tears stained on your cheek with his thumb lovingly, leaving his hands on your face. "you've been wanting to say all of that for a while huh? i feel like that outburst has been building up overtime." you just nod, not knowing what to say. "y/n, i swear to god, we've been dating. maybe not officially boyfriends, but dating." the confusion on your face must've been extremely evident, because he squishing his eyebrows together in retaliation. "you... you know i'm like... in love with you right...? right?"

"huh?" you sniffle, the tears stopping from the perplexed feeling overtaking your sadness. "you've never asked me out!"

"yes, i did! remember, at the park, when we had a picnic and i brought strawberry soju and the whole charcuterie board. i asked you that day, i remember what i said because i wrote it down. i said 'y/n, can we take this to the next step?' and you were like, 'yes!' so i thought you knew!"

oh.

you have never felt so fucking stupid in your life.

"that's what you meant?! i thought you meant to the next step of the stairs we were on!"

heeseung just looks at you blankly, mouth ajar. after a few moments, he just laughs, the sound so loud it reverberates through the room and even rumbles the bed. "n-no fucking way! is that why you randomly picked up the fucking blanket and moved it up to the actual next step?!"

"'cause that's what i thought you meant!" you exclaimed, the anchor in your heart that you didn't even know existed being relieved the more heeseung talked.

heeseung embraces you, placing another kiss onto your lips for a second, then just hovers in front of them, looking into your eyes. "then let me make it explicitly clear. y/n, i'm so fucking in love with you. please let me be your boyfriend."

you respond to him with a kiss of your own, allowing yourself to be overtaken with the absolute relief from the dredge that had been weighing you down on your guys' relationship for weeks upon weeks now. "yes, heeseung. i'd love for you to be my boyfriend."

he just smirks, hands moving from your face down to the hem of your shirt, wanting for you to take it off, which you gladly comply with. "fucking good. been wanting to kiss you, strip you, make you mine for weeks now, but you never reciprocated, so i just thought you weren't ready..." he takes your shorts off with efficiency, not wanting to waste any time with you.

"oh yeah? aren't you still drunk, heeseung?"

"was never that drunk to begin with, just wanted to get that water thing to work, but this..." placing his hands on your thighs, he spreads your legs and pulls you closer, "this is so much fucking better."

#enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen angst #enhypen x male reader #enhypen x reader #enhypen heeseung #heeseung #heeseung x reader #heeseung x male reader #male reader #solarnomoon

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34saveme34 · 4 months

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SMG34: The Rot (a fic by yours truly)

image semi related

summary: 3 gets told to come and investigate this thing called "The Rot" in a forest, so him, 4, Meggy, Mario and Boopkins (surprisingly) set out to check it out, although things get a little odd as the Rot's influence gets to our favourite man. Sure wonder what'll happen to him!

word count: 5722

3 wasn’t happy he got roped into this. However he owed this one… he owed this one to Meggy. He hated how the closer he became to 4’s crew they only seemed to able to collect more firt on him. Although he didn't know how she could get her hands on his online activity on such forums, he thought he was better this time at covering his tracks…At least he wasn’t alone, a few others came along, like 4, Boopkins and Mario.

It was… a hike. Through the forest. Meggy had seen strange sightings and wanted to bring along others as well. This worried 3 because he really really didn’t want to break his streaming streak. He had been doing so well, having a schedule and everything and of course as soons as he got on track, someone had to come in and ruin it. This always happened so it didn’t surprise him too much but he was mad about it either way.”

However, Meggy agreed with him that he could stream this, it would be especially cool if they were to find something interesting, as if they were ghost hunters. At least something 3 can look forward to. Things that could make his streaming careers more successful always had an easier time persuading him. And he knew that, he wasn’t happy about it, but it was just a fact of life. Just like how he knew how close he grew to 4. It was hard to deny, he really cared about him. Though sometimes, scratch that, just about all the time, he made it really hard to do so. He didn’t remember a prolonged peaceful time with him. Something always has to happen, with the tension they developed over the years. But honestly, who could blame them for that?

Something that Meggy forgot to do among all things she should’ve done, was ask the others if they’re okay with the livestream. It’s really not the greatest thing to argue about on live.

“I don’t wanna have the pressure of invisible eyes on me while I don’t even know what I’m facing!” 4 whined, he looked a bit scared.

“Finally, I can add more to my smg4 fail compilation, you better not disappoint” 3 giggled, making 4 groan.

“It’s not funny, you know! Also I'm just as capable to embarrass you as well! I know what you are”

“Oh, you bastard? Are you threatening me? Right in front of my viewers?? I’ll get you cancelled on Twitter for this one!”

“Not Twitter, god no, though I bet they would like some things I have a hold of myself, like that search query you did concerning-” 4 smirked at 3, seemingly the 2 were just about to fight before Meggy pulled them apart.

“Okay, guys, that’s enough! Let’s get going”

“Oooooh” Mario pouted, putting down the popcorn he pulled out of nowhere. He loved to watch his guardians fight for such low stakes. There was something special about the ones making him dance like a clown dance for him on their own volition.

“So what are we looking at anyways?” Boopkins asked, looking scared.

“I… can’t say. I think you have to see it yourself to believe it. Although I just like to call it the rot.”

“Th… The rot?” my guy was shaking. Boopkins, what the hell, you just got here.

“Why are you here anyways? No naptime for you?” Mario teased him.

“Umm no… I just wanna try and get braver! So I can be there for my friends even more!”

“Aww, yea yea now let’s get going!” Meggy truly had enough with the banter. But would it be a real live stream if it started smoothly?

They started walking, with Mario and Meggy in the lead, with Boopkins not too far behind them. However 3 and 4 were at the back, not much further but they definitely weren’t as close to Boopkins as he was to Mario and Meggy.

3 turned his camera at 4 which made him frown.

“What, am I that interesting? Am I getting views for you?” 4 whined sarcastically, he didn’t feel like being on a stream right now. Especially since this expedition pulled him away from meme creation. As in his one and true love!

“Well, you might! Just do something embarrassing, that’d definitely work!”

“Like what, tell them about when we were younger I busted you in the toilets with-” 4 got slapped before he could answer.

3 wasn’t having any of it.

“Very mature of you to bring up the past, really, classic SMG4”

“At least I didn’t like, I don’t know, try to kill people”

“Don’t you have a body count higher than zero?”

“You… can’t prove that. Besides I bet you killed more!”

“And that’s in the past, you know? Besides, being an ex villain makes me hotter, just ask my fans”

4 looked so done with 3, especially after he showed his chat filled with overflowing thirsty support for his post villain self. 3 loved the reaction, it was like warming him up from the inside. Although he would like it better if his charisma was more appreciated by his guardian partner.

“Aaah yes, so hot twitch streamer, Super Meme Guardian 3, I could never compare”

3 laughed and looked at his chat then frowned. This surprised 4 a bit, especially since 3 decided to face his camera ahead again, to record where they’re actually walking. 3 sighed, which held 4’s attention longer than it should have.

“What’s up?” 4 asked quietly.

“Not much… just a cringe comment I didn’t like” 3 basically brushed him off. It seemed he didn’t want to go into it so 4 left him to it. It had been hard, but 4 had been trying to pay attention to when he needed to stop. He had been getting to a point where he could tell that he shouldn’t bother 3 further. It became mildly easy as he noticed how much of an open book 3 is. Just push the correct buttons and you get him all wrapped within your grasp. Like to do your bidding and stuff. 4 considered 3 a great ally and he used him a lot as well. Although he still cared about him a lot. Sometimes he wondered if 3 realised that. He just didn’t really know how to be affectionate towards 3. Whenever he tried to be serious about it, it kind of fell apart. Wanting to be kind towards him in hard situations, like when they were stuck in the elevator, yet he was met with hostility. The whole situation reminded him of a cold, snowy day as well. He shook his head hard, he didn’t need that thought right now. 3 looked at him confused, then saw how 4 was looking in the distance, and sadness he forgot to hide still showing. 3 passed his camera to Boopkins for a bit.

“Can you hold this for me for a bit?” 3 reached to Boopkins who took the camera gently with a smile. Since he helped him out with the date with M… Mi… Micheal? What was it again? He felt a bit more tolerable. Not by much though.

“Sure thing!”

Although the camera looked a little funny in his hands, considering how the camera was like third his size.

4 paid attention to this, a bit confused at what 3 was doing. He did find Boopkins struggling to carry the camera a bit funny though.

“So” 3 pulled 4 close by his back, wrapping his arm around him, continuing in a hushed tone “What’s the gloom for? It’s super obvious and it bothers me so that’s why I’m bothering you about it”

4 chuckled.

“I’m glad you care. That’s all I needed actually” 4 showed a genuine smile to 3 which left him speechless. 4 could see he made 3 a bit flustered, maybe a bit more than just a bit…

It’s like he was buffering or something.

“Ugh” 3 pulled away “Your sweetness makes me sick, god damn it… baka”

Slowly Mario turned around, pulling out a tiny rainbow flag.

“This you?” he pointed at the 2.

3 was too shocked to react, 4 threw a loose branch at him which got into his eye. Mario started screaming in his iconic way. Meggy slapped him into a new shape.

“Shhh!!! Don't disturb the wildlife, idiot!”

Mario whined quietly, removing the tiny branch from his eye. Just as he removed it, he basically forgot it was there, as he continued frolicking.

3 finally took his camera back from Boopkins.

“Finally, my arms were starting to get tired!” Boopkins sighed with relief.

Meggy turned to him although still walking.

“I could coach you to get stronger”

The relief quickly flew out of Boopkins, rather replaced with a pale expression.

“I hope I don’t hurt you with this, but I’d rather not if it’s okay”

“Your loss” Meggy shrugged.

As they continued, they started to find traces of the so-called Rot.

“This energy feels familiar” 3 exclaimed.

“Same here…” 4 added, as he exchanged a glance with 3.

“That’s a good thing! Any idea what we could be dealing with then?”

“So…” 4 started “It could be a new meme. Although I… don’t remember ever seeing it before”

“The name rot does fit it though” 3 continued “You think it could do with all the memes people used to make about bogs?”

“That’s a nice thought! Or maybe one of those nature allegory memes that sometimes pop up… most of the time from Tumblr”

“Ah right, Tumblr, this could be one of their creations”

“I thought Tumblr was dead” Meggy looked behind at the 2 as they continued on, seeing more rot on the trees and in the ground. It seemed they were getting closer and closer to the core of it.

“That’s what they all think” 3 and 4 said at the same time, then laughed at how in sync they were.

“What is tumblr?” Mario asked. The others looked at him with a knowing look. He deflated, seeing no one wanted to elaborate.

While the lighthearted banter they got into was nice, 3 couldn't shake off the tension he was feeling. Probably thanks to 4. He didn't like how his mind went for the worst when it came to him. He tried to concentrate on the task on hand, the sooner it was over, the sooner he could escape.

As they continued on, 3 was starting to feel a headache get to him. It was starting to be a bit difficult holding the camera. He tried so hard to be there but it felt like slowly everything was slowing down around him. He looked ahead… then he found himself staring at 4, getting even slower, blurrier, slowly things becoming less and less comprehensive, yet he could still feel in his heart just how worried 4 was. It felt… nice. He was glad 4 cared about him. Then everything went black. At least mostly. He was stuck in a weird state, still lightly aware of his surroundings, as he could feel himself falling over, then being grabbed and held close… Held close…? What for?

He lightly managed to open his eyes and tried to perceive the world around him, although it hurt him. It was difficult, but he figured out he was stuck in 4’s arms. Not exactly somewhere he wished to be while in a state like this. He kind of imagined feeling this sick while being cared for in his bed. Thinking about it… he wouldn’t mind 4 being there then. But this is just… embarrassing… He really hoped the stream wasn’t getting any of this… He already saw that one comment referring to 4 and him in weird ways and he didn’t like that. He felt uncomfortable on 4’s behalf as well. Who knows how hard his fans would tear him apart if they knew that he and 4 need to hold hands to use their meme guardian powers. It made him think about how he would even handle having a relationship like this. Either he would have to hide this person even if he was proud of pulling a bad bitch or have them be on display but risk the parasocial freaks coming in and ruining his dating life. He wasn’t new to the parasocial rodeo at this point, he knew about the sexyman allegations. Though it’s not like he wanted a relationship right now anyways. He liked to joke about getting bitches but he really just did that because he felt humiliated at the thought that he couldn’t pull anyone. He closed his eyes, trying to close out the sight that was 4 carrying him. That’s not to say he was fully against it but he won’t admit that so soon. But as he closed the sight out, he could hear words better.

“Homo…” he could hear Mario start then if he was guessing right, he got slapped since he stopped speaking.

“Well I’m not just gonna drag him by the foot, that would be cruel” he could hear 4 retort at the homosexual allegations.

“Is he gonna be okay?” Meggy asked, concern in her voice. 3 was kind of glad he had friends that cared for him. He wished he could say that without getting embarrassed. He hoped that they knew about it at least a little bit, as much as he could hint. But not too much, their annoying asses didn't deserve to see THAT much of him.

“I think so” 4 said “But he’s definitely not streaming like this, can we turn it off?”

“Well if you insis-” Meggy started.

“Nnnn…nnooooo… ss… stream…” 3 tried to get it out, the words small and weird. But they were heard. He didn’t like ending streams so suddenly. He’d rather die on camera than suddenly end a stream.

He heard 4 chuckle.

“Look at him, even in this state, he cares about his fans”

“How nice of him” Boopkins spoke up.

“I can see said fans are feeling the same way!” Meggy chuckled “It seems a lot of people are interested in what’s up here anyways so… for 3!”

“For 3!” both 4 and Boopkins cheered.

If 3 was fully there, he would be so embarrassed. He’d hate it. He’s starting to like this… as if he’s looking in from the outside, not subject to the actual affection of his friends yet still being the subject of it. Unbeknownst to him, he was smiling about this in 4’s arms, who noticed so. But didn’t dare comment on it. Who knows how his insane fans would treat it. Although he couldn’t just go without letting 3 know, if he could hear him.

“If you only looked this cute while conscious” 4 chuckled into 3’s ear. It sent a jolt through 3’s body, but still not enough to get him out of his state. So it was all still energy, so much, as if continuously zapping his mind. What the FUCK did 4 just say?? HIM??? CUTE??? Well, he was handsome but CUTE??? HIM??? No way, 4 didn’t know what he’s talking about. Yet the words rang in his mind, foreverly so, not leaving him. Like a forever moment. Feeling obsessed with it, even if he didn’t want to be. It made him feel so warm. Like he could feel it physically now. He heard 4 chuckle, unsure where to put it, it only made him feel weirder. It was like 4 had his fingers wrapped around him in a mental sense as well, whatever he would say, he wouldn’t be able to escape. It was… weird feeling this vulnerable.

Slowly he stirred more in 4’s arms. Still remaining as calm as he could manage, to not disturb 4 too much. He was actually kind of comfortable. Not like he’ll say that out loud. Maybe he’ll write it down in his notebook later. It had been a great source of coping for him. Writing about the things that made him feel feelings usually made them easier to digest. He looked up at 4 with half lidded eyes, he seemed so… focused. He noticed then 4 looking down, which surprised him a bit. 4 smiled, then looked to the side.

“It seems he looks a bit better now”

“That’s good! Makes me feel less bad about how we keep on going”

“We should stop for a bit though… my arms are standing to get tired… he isn’t exactly light”

“...Bitch” 3 muttered, first coherent thing he said since falling over like a log.

Everyone kind of laughed about it.

“Mario agrees!” Mario stopped and immediately whipped out his pocket spaghetti. Who knows how long that’s been there. He seemed to be happy to eat it either ways.

They all laid down for a bit, 4 laying 3 down as well then sat beside him. He really just decided to sit beside him. Maybe he really did care.

3 reached up, as best as he could as he regained his strength, reaching to 4. 4 looked at his hand a bit confused, then decided to hold it, not really understanding what 3 wanted.

“Pfft… sure whatever”

“What?” 4 asked but 3 only rolled his eyes in response.

“Guess you don’t need it then”

4 took his hand away. 3’s smile lightly faded away but not too much. He didn’t want it to be too obvious that he was disappointed about that. He wasn’t even sure how to explain that he was disappointed. He just knew that it meant a lot to him that 4 did that. He never imagined he would get so weak about him. Weak about whatever 4 directed his way.

Let it be his insults or the looks he could give him when he showed he cared. He wanted to have him whole, with all those silly little intricacies that made him who he was, even his cringe memes. Never did he care so much for someone in his life… What… What did he mean by this? Oh… OH… no… not here… not now… why couldn’t this happen at like- a more appropriate place- somewhere without 4 preferably- Well, the world is cruel to him so now he had to keep himself together in this damned situation.

He slowly sat up, not really looking at anything. He slowly breathed in, then out, slowly calming the nerves that scream about what’s boiling underneath his skin, his mind. His feelings were. Restless.

“Are you okay, 3?” Meggy turned to him, with a soft, understanding smile.

“So-so… could be better” 3 smiled back, which surprised Meggy a little.

“Do you remember what happened?”

“Not much… But…” 3 took all the strength in himself, all his emotional strength “I think the rot feeds on… frustration? I think, or anger.. I remember feeling sort of angry before… since a certain someone here can be such a piece of ass here” 3 said as he directly looked at 4.

“Did you hear what I say to you? If so, right now I’m really meaning it”

“Asshole…”

“What did you say to him?” Meggy asked, a bit suspiciously.

“That’s between us” 4 said, as he got up “We gotta keep moving anyways, I can feel how close we are”

“Yeah… let’s” 3 slowly got up, stretching his back, being held for a bit there made his back feel like a quirky little snake. The slightly loud pop from his back made Boopkins jump.

Mario looked at the 2, a big big grin that kept getting bigger.

“Hmmmmmmmmmmmm” he teased the 2, just even with his menacing Mario gaze.

3 and 4 exchanged glances.

“Home of sexual” Mario claimed, with the same big grin. 4 was ready to throw hands but 3 just got up and started walking. This shocked both but especially Meggy.

“I have no power or need to feel angry right now let’s just go, I’ll feed him bombs when we get back”

“Feeding time?” Mario looked on with great interest, his selective hearing deciding to focus right on the word ‘feed’ “Does Mario get his spaghetti?”

“Later, red, we have a mission on our hands right now”

As Meggy spoke, 3 realised his camera was in Meggy’s hand. He quickly took it back, Meggy barely realising it was taken from her.

“What’s up, chat! I live! I could never leave a stream interrupted, all of you know I’m stronger than that so I’m here again!” he marched on, with a big smile on his face. This surprised the others, especially 4 and Meggy as they looked at each other then followed after him, with Boopkins hurrying after them with his short legs. Mario shrugged, quickly forgetting about food as he followed behind them a bit delayed.

“Oh thanks for the bits! As for your question, we’re looking into something geniusly named the rot!.... ‘Is it really named the rot?’ It wasn’t named by me, I would’ve given it a better name, like forest meme fungus parasite or something like that”

“That’s actually kind of lame” 4 said.

“I agree actually” Meggy added.

Boopkins looked too concerned to end up on either sides.

“Whatever… ‘How far is it? We’ve been here for a while’ I think we’re getting closer! As you can see the trees look much different here” he put his hand against a tree, which leaked weird residue “AAAAH EWW EWW WHAT THE HELL”

4, Meggy and Mario laugh at him.

“Stuuu-piiiid” Mario keeps laughing.

3’s eyes twitched, but he was keeping his cool.

“And I think this isn’t even the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen him do!” 4 said.

Oh 4. His sweet prince. He’s done it. Truly. 3 slowly looked at him, 4 started to look scared. 3 ran at him, camera still in his hand, getting the weird liquid on him as well.

4 looked offended to hell, heaven and purgatory, he was NOT letting this go so easily. He grabbed a bit of rot as well and threw it at 3.

Mario clapped, the clowns are dancing again. Boopkins hid behind Meggy, who didn’t look very satisfied with Mario.

But, oh, if she didn’t pay attention to him, she would have realised that the ground was moving, but she only noticed when it was already pulling 3 and 4 down, and fast at that.

“4!!! 3!!!” Meggy cried out, trying to reach into the rot to no avail. It seemed she couldn’t get into it like those 2 managed to.

“Oh nooo” Mario genuinely got sad as he got down beside Meggy.

“What do we do now?” Boopkins went there last, although just as concerned as the other 2.

“I don’t know… the best we can do is… I think we should go back and get some tools! Maybe we can dig them out. Hopefully before the sun sets” Meggy proposed her idea, the other 2 nodded as they got up and started to run back, although not too fast to preserve stamina. They’re gonna NEED it.

3 and 4 laid there, underneath for a bit. It took a while until one woke up, which was 4. They were on top of each other, which he wasn’t too thrilled about. Though, to his horror, he couldn’t get up. He was stuck to him like this. At least it was just by their waists mainly… Who was he kidding, that’s probably the worst place to get stuck at, hands were way better, he’d rather have a week of that than this! He looked around, seeing that the place wasn’t big anyways. It was kind of dark, only illuminated by the rot’s faint blueish-green glow. What a weird way for a meme to manifest. At this point he was pretty sure it was a meme, although a powerful one. It seemed it had a strong staying power, one he hadn’t seen in a while. Another sign that it could be from Tumblr. He never liked Tumblr memes, they were always weird and hard to deal with. Since 3 was still not awake, 4 couldn’t channel the meme away either, 3 had to be at least awake for that. At least it was calm. He decided to pay attention to 3’s face. Just like before, he looked so peaceful. Although he could appreciate the energy he brought, he sometimes wished 3 could direct energy like this at him. He smiled, glad that he could get something like this to happen, although he’s still not very happy about the situation. As 4 looked around again, he noticed the lightly damaged camera, directed at them, still on.

“Ah” was all that was left in his mouth, as he went a bit pale, knowing what they were doing was broadcasted to many people. He got on 4s, in an uncomfortable way, considering he was still stuck to 3 and reached for the camera.

“Ummm… Hello, SMG3 viewers” 4 started awkwardly “I’d like to say thank you for all of you being here. Especially thank you for motivating us to go forward. I think I know what we will have to do with this so-called rot… But I will end stream here, it’s been a good run, thank you all for coming” 4 smiled at the camera and waved before turning the broadcast off.

That was when 3 stirred.

“Nggghh…” 3 looked up, having to blink a few times to see what the fuck is going on, kind of not believing his eyes, as he could feel his ears and face heat up.

“OI WHAT THE FUCK DUDE” 3 flipped, literally flipped, thinking they could separate but instead they fell over together, now with 3 on top, and their faces getting a bit too close from the velocity. 3 got distracted for a second. 4 took a bit before he returned the favour, as 3’s careless outburst only served to make him angrier. And so they got into a cycle of throwing each other but the bond on them still not budging.

“Why must you be such a bitch,,” 4 whined as 3 tried his best pulling 4 off of his waist, but he only bounced back, their foreheads meeting. which made both yelp in pain.

“FUCKING CHRIST” 3 cried out.

“DUMBASS” 4 cried back at him.

3 tried to calm himself down as he looked around, seeing his camera which was turned off.

“Did… the camera break?”

“No… I” 4 realised he might not live “turned off the stream” his words were small.

3 slowly turned to him, his face the reckoning, judgement upon him, all in a pair of eyes that belong to his meme guardian partner.

“You… did… what?” 3 leaned closer to him, it would’ve been an understatement to call his vibes menacing.

“I-I” 4 trembled under 3’s gaze.

“You don’t SIMPLY end my stream”

“I said goodbye!!”

“And?”

“I thanked them for being here!!”

“...”

4 looked scared as hell, his puppy eyes coming out, begging for forgiveness. Those eyes hit 3 square in the heart.

“Shit.. whatever I guess, I’ll let you be about it”

“Oh, thank you thank you” 4 hugged him, 3 could only roll his eyes.

3 tried to get up again, and maybe stand up right if everything goes well. And as he did, it seemed to be really hard for their faces to not be close. It was starting to frustrate both of them. Slowly, they both stood on their feet, although still stuck to each other. That’s when 4 remembered.

“Hey, wait, we can channel the rot away! You can feel its meme energy too, right?”

3 looked up, then nodded. 4 grabbed both of 3’s hands. 3 was sort of distracted by the whole thing. He didn’t like being so close so soon. He wanted to have at least a little bit of time to process his feelings. 4 noticed that, as they weren’t as efficient as they were supposed to be.

“3!! What’s with you??”

That seemed to snap 3 out of it, who looked to the side, a powerless sigh escaping his lips.

“I can’t explain”

“WHAT do you mean you can’t explain?? Let’s just get out here!! Don’t you want to get out??”

“I-... of course I do, you think I’m stupid?”

“Well, you’re looking very stupid right now, not channeling yourself!”

“Don’t you… don’t you see…? We’re just… a bit too close for my taste” 3 looked down, feeling ashamed. He didn’t want it to be true but it was, tears welling up in his eyes.

“What do you-”

“IT- IT WOULD BE SO MUCH EASIER IF YOU WEREN’T RIGHT IN MY FACE” 3 cried, tears rolling down his face “YOU think I WANT TO BE HERE?? I’D RATHER BE ETERNITIES AWAY FROM YOU RIGHT NOW” those tears just wouldn’t stop.

“THEN FUCKING CHANNEL, YOU BITCH, THEN YOU CAN GO”

“FUCK YOU”

“WHAT”

4 let go of 3’s hands, now pissed himself, both of them pissed in fact.

“BITCH” 3 added.

“WHY YOU-”

And they started throwing hands, fighting again. Which fell to an abrupt end, as 4 held 3 against a wall of rot.

“WHY CAN’T YOU JUST CHANNEL”

“I FEEL STUPID WITH YOU”

“YOU’RE CALLING ME STUPID?” 4 leaned closer to 3, who seemed to feel more ashamed than ever, as if he said something sacred, as if he sinned.

“Ju… just sh-.. shut up already, fuck..” 3 could feel his heart twist. 3 looked at 4 slowly, cautiously sadness pouring out from his eyes. He couldn’t hide it. He felt ashamed but he knew no other way out.

“3… 3 I’m…” 4 returned to a softer gaze.

“Are you stupid? I said…” once again, 3’s heart, it couldn’t take it “I feel stupid WITH you”

“Wh… What?”

“You really are stupid…”

4 didn’t look amused.

“So you called me stupid anyways”

“YOU-” 3 clenched his fists, trying his best to hold back from screaming at 4 again “You just… don’t seem to understand. And… I don’t know if I’m… shameless enough to just tell you everything…”

4 could feel something in his heart now as well. He didn’t understand what was going on.

“I’m… sorry”

“Oh? What did you say?”

“I said that I’m sorry…”

“Can you say it again?” 3 looked at him with a little evil grin, although still strained from the emotions he was feeling. It was obvious to 4. He gave him the stink eye then moved one of his hands to pet 3’s head.

“Can a man not be sorry?” 4 joked, which kind of worked, although the head pat flustered 3 a bit.

“Shut the fuck up”

“Sheesh”

3 giggled, seemingly calming down a bit.

“Let’s just get this over with, 3? You did say you wanted to be gone from me” although 4 would usually hide his feelings better, he sounded more sad than he should have.

3 couldn’t help but smile.

“So you DO care, huh?”

“I- of course I do, you’re one of my bestest friends!! I wouldn’t wanna stay away from you”

“Right right…friends… “ 3 looked down, he couldn’t bring himself to be angry anymore. He was tired.

“Wait you- you don’t mean…” 4 stared at 3, who wouldn’t dare look back. Although, it was hard avoiding him when they’re stuck by the waist.

Suddenly a lot of things started to make sense to 4. Memories flashing by him, as he looked at 3, looking back at everything. The things he would feel with him. More than just the meme energy they could channel together, there was way more there, more than he ever realised. They way he just… my god… The realisation hit him like a car crash.

“I’m in love with you??” 4 spoke confused, 3 looked at him confused.

3 couldn’t bring himself to words, he could only look back at 4. 3 knew his heart was flying sky high though, with his face feeling god awfully warm too. After the confusion wore off, 4 smiled, kind of coming to peace with it. Skipping a few stages of grief there, huh?

“Let’s get out of here, 3” he grabbed his hands, once again, although softly.

The 2 look at each other for quite a long moment, as they slowly channel the meme energy, yet they can’t help thinking: this is not enough. It’s kind of weird how they both leaned in at the same time, sharing a power shattering kiss that vaporized all the rot out of existence, even the thin layer that made them stuck. Although they were still stuck in the hole that the rot dug out. They looked up, finally seeing the outside world. It was a sight they didn’t think they’d miss so much. Ironically to what 3 was saying before, he didn’t seem to want to let go of 4. 4 didn’t mind that.

“Hey” 3 spoke awkwardly “Just saying if you’d like to kiss me again, you’re totally allowed to”

4 smiled brightly as he took on the request, melting into 3’s touch in the process. Nothing was perfect and wonderful sunshine forever rainbow though so…

“Guys, we’re- oooooooh” Meggy stopped as she noticed the 2.

“We’re here we’re- OOOOOOOOOH” Mario piped up even louder.

“What’s with the- WOAAAH” Boopkins seemed to be the most surprised. He didn’t even see it coming.

The 2 idiots finally noticed the outrage their homosexual activity made happen.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP” 3 yelled at them.

“Yeah you tell them!!” 4 cheered him on.

The 3 other idiots, who patiently pulled them out of the hole could barely wait to ask about everything. What happened in there? Are they Homo Sex now? (A Mario original question) Most importantly: are they okay?

“None of you speak of what you saw” 3 pointed at Meggy, Mario and Boopkins. Boopkins and Meggy nodded, while Mario had different intentions. He was going into his usual devious Mario smile.

“Mario” 3 looked at him with violent intent.

“Hee hee hee”

“Mario, he’s serious” 4 added, also ready to throw hands.

Mario took a few seconds then suddenly took off.

“MARIOOO”

“GET BACK HERE”

“MARIO MUST SHARE WORD OF THE GAY”

And so they couldn’t catch him, now everyone knew that his guardian partners were also romantic partners now. A beautiful ending <3.

---

Hope this was enjoyable! It is my first fic with this series so obviously it's not perfect. Fun fact! I wrote this in one night.

I may possibly have more ideas but nothing too concrete yet oopsie

#smg34 #Nicc's-fics

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lovesuhng · 9 months

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Inseparable Friend - Johnny Suh

couple: ex-best friend johnny x fem!reader gênero: angst; fluff; friends to strangers to lovers wc: 2.9k summary: johnny was your best friend and platonic love during his high school days, but he left without even saying goodbye. 10 years later, you meet again at the class of 2013 reunion. do you still feel the same way about your former best friend? how about giving him another chance? a/n: i wrote this plot on twitter because i saw some beautiful photos of johnny (which are these photos) and i promised a friend that i would write it. the main is a mcfly fan (like me), so if you don't know the band, give them the opportunity!

Your cell phone was shining, you knew it was Doyoung asking if you were ready for the class of 2013 reunion. All you wanted most was to stay at home, in your bed, watching any nonsense on the internet, but you promised him you would go to this reunion. It wasn't like you had any enemies or hated your senior year at school, you just didn't feel like leaving home, besides the fact that they would definitely ask about your “inseparable friend”, who you hadn't had contact with in years.

As soon as you arrived at the place where the reunion would take place, you soon saw Doyoung, accompanied by his girlfriend Sejeong, talking to Jaehyun, his former high school classmate and best friend of your “inseparable friend”. After talking to a few people, you finally managed to get to where your friends were.

“I thought you wouldn’t come.” Sejeong asked, seeing that her friend wasn't very excited to go.

“I actually considered not coming, my bed was much more inviting, but you have a boyfriend who disturbed me the whole time.” You gave an almost deadly look to Doyoung, who shrugged. “Hi Jaehyun! Long time no see!” You smiled kindly at him, he returned it and seemed happy to see you.

“It’s true, how many years have we last seen each other? About eight?”

“Yes, I think the last time we saw each other was at a college party.”

The conversation between you was flowing naturally, as much as you wouldn't admit it to Doyoung, you were having fun remembering some funny things that had happened in high school. For some reason, you felt that Jaehyun avoided talking about his best friend so as not to cause some kind of discomfort in you, but it was okay, since this was something you had already overcome a long time ago.

Or maybe not.

You couldn't quite explain what you were feeling when you looked at the entrance to the place and saw him there. John Suh, or rather Johnny. Also known as your “inseparable friend” from high school, as well as being your first love. Time had certainly been kind to him. Johnny was always popular and handsome, but now, it was a crime. He was a little taller and definitely went to the gym often, he wore a simple white blouse, a leather jacket, jeans and a white all-star. The hair was a little longer. For you, that was the definition of a perfect man. Noticing that he was coming in the direction where you were, you quickly looked away to Doyoung, who was just as surprised as you and just whispered “I had no idea he was coming.”

To explain better, Johnny and you were inseparable since elementary school, you grew up together. You two went to your first parties together, you shared secrets, the small achievements of the time, like your first kiss and you were by your side at all times. As a consequence of being a super cool, funny guy and his popularity being great due to the fact that he was one of the most popular players on the school's volleyball team, Johnny was attracting people's attention, especially girls who saw themselves in love with him, as well as You fell in love with him too. However, you didn't have time to talk about your feelings to him, because on the day of the prom, the day chosen for your confession, Johnny didn't show up, he didn't give any explanation, he didn't say goodbye. He just moved far away to fulfill his dream of attending his much-desired photography university. You cried for nights, tried to understand what had happened, you knew that Johnny hated goodbyes, but you weren't just anyone, you were his best friend forever and you didn't even know about your approval on the course of your dreams.

You were trying to deal with this absence that hurt so much in your chest, the subject of Johnny Suh was still very sensitive, almost everyone knew that. You thought that someone would bring up the subject, but you didn't expect that the “subject” would appear in front of you, greeting each one, with that smile that kept you awake at the same time as it warmed your heart, until he looked at you. For a few seconds, which seemed like an eternity, it seemed like nothing had changed. And that's what Johnny thought too. You were no longer that little girl he had left behind. You were a woman, a beautiful woman. He remembered all the special moments he had spent with you, the many times you ate pepperoni pizza on the floor of your room, played uno, walked in the park near the school and he insisted on taking photos of you that he never were shown.

“Hi” Was all he could say, breaking that exchange of glances.

“Long time, John. Nice to see you." You were trying to be as polite and strong as possible, but you wanted to run to your room and cry.

The night went by, you tried to distract yourself by talking to your friends and old schoolmates, but it was difficult to ignore Johnny when you felt his gaze at times. You were already tired, you thought you stayed there long enough and told Sejeong that you were going home, she even offered to go with you, but you refused. You said goodbye to everyone, went towards your car that was in the parking lot and when you were about to open the door you heard that voice that, even after years, you recognized so well calling your name.

“Hi John.” You said as you turned around and saw him nearby. "Something happened?"

“No, it’s… I… wanted to know how you are. We didn’t talk today.” Johnny said, putting his hands in his jeans pocket. You knew he was nervous, but why? Wasn't he the one who left you without saying goodbye? This was no time for these thoughts and questions.

“Ah, I'm fine, just a little tired from work. If you don't mind, I'm on my way now. Goodnight"

“But…” He again stopped you from getting in the car and leaving. “I would like to know if we can go out one day, I really want to talk to you” For the thousandth time that night, you looked into the honey-colored eyes that you once liked so much. You saw the truth in Johnny's eyes and words, who was anxiously waiting for your answer. "I do not want to talk! You had the chance to explain yourself for 10 years and you did nothing.” That's what you wanted to answer at that moment.

"Okay." It was the only word that came out of his mouth. You exchanged cell phone numbers and you could see that Johnny had a goofy smile on his face, but you couldn't let that fool you.

“I'll send you a message so we can schedule everything correctly, okay? It was great to meet you again. I missed you."

Watching Johnny say goodbye, you were sure of one thing:

Johnny Suh still made you feel like a silly teenager in love with your best friend.

That same day, Johnny had sent you a message, which was followed by several others daily. You couldn't deny that Johnny was trying hard to earn your friendship and trust once again. He asked you about your work, your new hobbies, if you had heard from friends at school, in short, he wanted to know what had happened during those years. You also couldn't deny that you were enjoying the attention you were receiving from him.

But something still bothered you: Johnny never talked about his life and why he left without saying goodbye. You wanted to ask, you felt like he owed you an explanation, but you were still afraid to bring up the subject, after all, you didn't want to pressure him.

It was Friday night, after a long week of work, you were home. you had just taken a hot shower and were looking at your phone while eating something. Johnny had sent a few messages, including an invitation to have coffee the next day, he said he wanted to talk to you, as well as see you.

And there he was, in front of the agreed cafe, waiting for you. Johnny was pacing back and forth visibly nervous, constantly looking at his watch, why had he decided to arrive so early? He only stopped when he saw you walking towards him, wearing a dress that went to your heels and white converse. He could have sworn you were an angel who had come to get him. You didn't want to look nervous seeing Johnny again, especially when he was wearing a white tank top with a striped shirt over it, looser jeans and a cap, which only left the ends of his long hair showing. Once again, Johnny was the personification of your 'ideal type', but you would do everything you could to not show that. The man welcomed you with a beautiful smile, followed by a 'you look so beautiful' that left you completely blushing, then you chose what you would drink. Johnny was surprised when you didn't choose a latte, preferring an ice coffee, from what he remembered, you hated black coffee, so you explained to him that you had changed some habits for health reasons. After a few moments of talking, you finally said:

“What did you want to talk about?” Your voice revealed that you were nervous when asking this question, no matter how much you expected what Johnny was going to say.

“I think you must be curious that I went to the other side of the world without saying goodbye.” You just nodded. “And I also think you deserve an explanation. I was just scared.” Your face showed that you were confused by that. “Many things went through my head when I received the news that I had been approved to study at the university I always wanted. In addition to happiness, I was insecure, afraid of everything going wrong and disappointing my parents, of being away from the people I love and especially you. You know I hate saying goodbye to people...”

“But I wasn’t just anyone, John.” Hearing you call his name, Johnny knew you were upset and serious. “We were best friends, we shared everything. You disappeared on our graduation day, you left me without caring how I was feeling. If you had said you were going far away, of course I would have been sad, but I would understand that it was for the best, but disappearing without even saying goodbye broke my heart. Your explanation doesn’t make any sense.”

“There’s one more thing.” You encouraged him to continue. Then, he took one of her hands that was on the table and began to caress it. “I ‘ran away’ because I was also trying to run away from my feelings because… I was falling in love with you.”

You didn't know what you were feeling at that moment. It was a mix of disbelief and relief, anger and joy. You wanted to throw yourself into Johnny’s arms and run away from him at the same time. So, does this mean that your teenage love was reciprocated?

“I know you will hate me for this, but if I were to lose you, it would be because of distance and not because of my unrequited feelings.”

“You know that doesn’t make any sense, right?” You let out an indignant laugh at that and separated your hand from Johnny's. “I was also in love with you. That graduation night, I was going to tell you and that's why I was so sad. I loved you Johnny, very much. As angry as I was at the time, I'm not anymore. We are no longer the same teenagers, we are adults and we are learning to deal with our feelings.” At that moment, Johnny realized that you had become a wonderful woman, that you were moving away from the insecure teenager of your school days and her confession took him by surprise.

“So, will you forgive me for all the shit I did?”

“Dude, you show up 10 years later, admitting all your mistakes, apologizing and on top of that looking so fucking hot, of course I forgive you.”

Johnny's laugh echoed through the cafe and you finally felt like you had healed from a wound that had been open for years.

At the beginning of the evening, Johnny made a point of accompanying you to your apartment on a walk full of stories and memories of old times.

“Good, we’re here.”

“I confess that I was so nervous for our date today, but it was very pleasant. Thank you very much for this wonderful afternoon.”

“So this was a date?” Johnny said raising one of his eyebrows and in a tone that made you blush a lot. He had this habit of flirting with you since you were teenagers.

“Ah, it wasn’t much of a date… but you understood what I meant, so stop making jokes!” Once again the man laughed and when he saw that you were about to say goodbye, he interrupted you saying:

“Could you give me a hug before you go?”

You just stood on your tiptoes, put your hands on his shoulders and pulled him into a hug, you felt his hands grab your waist, lifting you off the ground. Her little screams in the middle of laughter made Johnny laugh too. When Johnny put you back on the ground, he slowly moved away until your faces were very close. Johnny's intense gaze, his eyes covering every part of his (no longer ex) best friend's face as if he wanted to decorate that new version of him. Then your gaze fell on his lips and Johnny took it as a sign. It was just a long peck, but it was enough to move his entire body and Johnny's heart. That was proof that he was not only willing to be your friend, but to be something more.

“Can you tell I’m still in love with you?” He said as soon as you separated.

“I think so” You let out a small laugh, still holding hands with him. “Johnny, I know you’re not asking me for anything right now, but let’s take it easy? You came back recently and, as much as I loved that kiss, I wanted some time to get to know more about adult Johnny.”

Johnny gently caressed your cheek, which automatically made you close your eyes, as you missed his touches, now with another meaning. “I will give you as much time as you need. I waited 10 years and I don’t mind waiting a little longer.”

And you wouldn't imagine how determined Johnny was to win you over. He called you almost every day just to hear your voice, whenever possible he would pick you up from work, he loved watching movies just to cling to you, he called you for some dates that you loved, ranging from having ice cream on the corner to in go to the most expensive record store in town. You loved every moment you spent with him and you loved even more the fact that he was respecting your space.

Another Friday had arrived, you had sent a message to Johnny asking to come to your apartment because, in addition to wanting to see him, you were upset about not being able to get a ticket to the concert of your favorite teenage band, McFLY, and you wanted do something to distract yourself. Johnny was already in his apartment, you were lying on the couch, drinking wine that he had brought and he noticed how upset you were, he knew that this band was very important to you, besides being their first show in years.

“If I had known you were going to be this sad, I wouldn’t have even come.”

“Ah Johnny, understand me, it’s McFLY! They were very important in forming my fan personality, you know that.”

“I know, so I won’t let you be sad about it.” Then, he took an envelope out of his jacket and handed it to you. You didn't understand what was happening, as it always is when you're with Johnny, but you jumped up from the couch when you opened the envelope: they were two tickets to the show you wanted so much.

"But how? Tickets sold out in minutes!”

“Let's say I have a photographer friend who will work on the show and he owed me a favor” Johnny said with a shrug, as if it were the easiest thing in the world, you were about to give him a hug, when he stopped you. “I know you’re really excited about the tickets, but could you take a look at the ticket inside?”

So that's when you got the second and biggest surprise of the night:

“You once told me that you had the dream of going to a McFLY concert and living the cliché of dancing and singing ‘All About You’ with your boyfriend. You already have the ticket.

Can I be your boyfriend?”

The man in front of him was nervous, but he was smiling, calmly waiting for his answer.

“There is no better person to be my boyfriend. Of course you can." It was then that Johnny hugged you with all the strength he had and kissed you, as he always wanted, full of a love saved for so many years.

They say love is patient, it happens at the right time. Maybe it wasn't meant to be at that time, but I knew that now it was right to give Johnny that opportunity, that no one would make you happier in this world than your inseparable friend.

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mauesartetc · 11 months

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Thoughts on Helluva Boss 205 ("Unhappy Campers")

Wow, this... This one may actually be worse than Murder Family. That's impressive.

Is anyone else noticing a pattern of Helluva Boss episodes going absolutely nowhere? Each one ends without affecting the larger plot in any meaningful way. Season 1's structure was fairly episodic as well, but at least back then there was some sense of progression.

I usually include separate lists of pros and cons in these critiques, but in this case, I have so few compliments to give this thing it's not worth it. I tried my best to find more to like about this episode, but it gave me bupkis to work with. So I'll just present all my notes in chronological order.

Let's get this over with.

-Looks like the rehab facility where Barb used to live is located in Sloth (on account of the floating islands and all the pink in the environment), just like the hospital in this season's previous episode. We've never seen care centers in any other ring, so... Does Hell society's opinion of sick people dictate that they're just lazy? Some clarification on that might be nice.

-"She's got a job now. A life. Don't fuck it up by findin' her." Holy shit, the nurse is the most mature, sympathetic character in this entire episode. Tasing Blitzo in the butthole earns her bonus points in my book. Nurse Pussyface, you are way too good for this show.

-Why is Blitzo even trying to visit his sister if he's been kicked out of the facility several times and knows she hates him? What's the impetus? "Look, I know you hate my guts, but Dad's dead, and he named you in the will." Or maybe he had an experience that reminded him of her and figured he'd drop by to see how she was? Y'know, something.

-By the way, Helluva's animation is usually a highlight, but here there's not much to say about it. It wasn't especially memorable or ambitious; just kinda... passable. Even the climactic fight scene (which I'll get to later) didn't have much to write home about.

-How the hell didn't the client notice the holes in his boat before he rowed it out into deep water? Because I'm pretty sure it would leak when it was still in the shallow end of the lake, unless this is a unique real-life boating phenomenon I'm not aware of. Also, you'd think this guy was a bit too gung-ho to get out on the lake for someone who can't swim. Did someone have a gun to your head, dude?

Fun fact: Did y'all know I was on staff at a summer camp once? We had a pond, canoes, and a boathouse just like the camp in this episode. One thing we had that this camp apparently doesn't, however, is this important rule: No one gets in a canoe without a life jacket. EVER. But, well... We see later that the adults at this camp don't care much about safety, so I guess that's fair enough. (Though I'm curious how they manage to stay open, or what the client's loved ones have to say about his mysterious disappearance.)

-What did the client do to get sent to Hell after he died? Mrs. Mayberry murdered someone, so that's why she's here, but this kid seems pretty chill-? (And don't even try to explain this on Twitter, writers. If it's not in the story itself, it ain't canon.) I also can't help but notice that his design reflects the way he died, but every other sinner's appearance is just random. Consistency? Who needs it!

-Some unintentional hilarity for ya: Here's Millie's face after the client recounted his death.

And she holds this pose for the remainder of the scene. Was there NO direction on how to animate Millie here?! This is a grim situation and she's smiling?! I get that she's a demon, but damn that is cold. It's never been clearer that half her role in this story is just smiling and looking cute, to the point the animators don't know what else to do with her.

-Richard Horvitz's valley girl voice was kinda funny. I dug it. Not sure why Moxxie and Millie had to dress in drag for anything other than cheap laughs, though.

-I know Millie's hurtin' for more development, but this story's conflict would have made SO much more sense from a character standpoint if Moxxie were getting all the praise from the campers. Think about it: He's the one Blitzo always shits on and doesn't believe in. He's the one whose father doesn't love him. He's the one who never gets positive attention from anyone except his wife. Suddenly the conflict is much more compelling: Now that he has approval from these humans, maybe he doesn't need it from Blitzo anymore (not sure why he needed his approval in the first place, but whatever). Maybe he'd realize what he's been missing, and how shitty Blitzo's treatment has been in comparison. Could this be the breaking point that finally gets him to muster some self-respect and quit IMP? We'll never know, because the episode has miscalculated where the most interesting dilemma actually lies.

As far as we can tell, Millie's had zero reason to doubt herself, and we never see her being mistreated like Moxxie has.

Take these lines of dialogue: "And for once I feel like... Like I'm important! Like I'm somebody to be proud of!"

Wouldn't they fit so much better if they came out of Moxxie's mouth?

-I kinda liked how the lyrics of Millie's song were humble while Moxxie's lyrics were egotistical, showing that being down to earth will win you friends while being self-centered will turn people off. But is that really the kind of message we need in an adult show? It's a useful lesson for children, but after you hit the age of this series' target demographic, most people will have the social skills to know better than to pull what Moxxie did at the campfire.

-Speaking of Moxxie being super immature, why does he weep when a bunch of preteens ignores him? They're...They're kids, Mox. They aren't your peers. Literally who cares. This behavior makes no sense outside of (once again) cheap humor. I could understand being bummed out that you're not good with kids if you wanted to have your own someday, but even that doesn't warrant actual tears. And this makes him look like a massive hypocrite later on when he asks Millie why it matters what "these yokels" feel about her. I mean... You seemed to care a lot about how they saw you, Moxxie...

-Moxxie's excuse for why it's so hard for him to get information on the case is that everyone's too busy "swooning over" Millie. Here's a thought: Why doesn't Millie get the info? She's the one everyone likes, so it should be a snap, right? Well, once again, the characters get railroaded because the writers can't entertain any other plot ideas. And of course Moxxie ends up getting blamed for everything as if he's the only one who fucked up here.

-Why the hell would a summer camp show so much favoritism toward a single camper that they set up a friggin' concert for this camper and this camper only? Yeah yeah, "viral sensation" and everything, but 1) The news crew can wait another day or so for camp to end in order to conduct an interview (y'know, something that wouldn't require a huge-ass stage and pyrotechnics that'd cost the camp boatloads of money), and 2) The camp staff thinks Millie is a child. How fucking irresponsible can you get to lavish this much attention on a kid? Think it'll go to her head or something? Psssh nah. Also, you're telling me none of the other campers are the tiniest bit jealous? How do you think they feel, seeing this one kid get treated like a god while they're left in the dust?

Okay, plot-wise, the writers decided they wanted Millie to sing a song so she's occupied during the final showdown with the killer. Easy solution: Camp talent show. That way, the adults treat all the campers equally, and Millie gets her (more believable) moment in the spotlight.

-Oh hey, we finally see Asmodean crystals in action. And of course the first one we see is a butt plug.

SuCh a MAturE shOw, GUys! (Sorry, I'm still laughing my head off at that.)

So, a bit of backstory for those who aren't familiar: We first learned of Asmodean crystals in the Season 2 premiere, when Stolas opened the grimoire to reveal Norse runes on its pages. Someone on the internet was kind enough to translate:

Now here's the deal: Blitzo tells the lust demon to open the portal with his crystal (even threatening him at gunpoint), leading me to believe only non-imps could use Asmodean crystals and that's why he needed the grimoire to get to the human world.

But guess what happens later:

Blitzo's sister Barb, another imp, uses a crystal on her bracelet to open a portal back to Hell. So what exactly was the point of stealing the grimoire from Stolas??

BLITZO. YOU. DENSE. MOTHERFUCKER.

Okay, maybe I'll be generous and acknowledge that there might be another explanation, like Blitzo getting banned from using Asmodean crystals because he's misused them in the past. (Maybe there's a spell that causes the crystals to burn him every time he tries to hold one. Something of that nature.) But at this point I don't trust these writers to fill in their plot holes. Or plot portals, as the case may be.

-The portals themselves are kinda pretty, though. I can appreciate that they look different from the portals created by the grimoire.

-Moxxie calls Blitzo "sir" in this episode despite Blitzo telling him to use his first name in Truth Seekers. Moxxie then uses it in "Ozzie's" (if I remember correctly), but now he's back to "sir" for unexplained reasons-? Coupled with how their relationship has reverted back to square one with Blitzo learning nothing (as well as no one bringing up the agents or what they can do to stop them leaking the proof that demons exist), do the writers just want us to forget that episode or what?

-Blitzo chastises Moxxie for dragging the case out for a week, but it took him a week to track down Barb. This hypocrisy is never addressed.

-At the boathouse, Blitzo tells Moxxie he's looking for his sister, then kicks down the door, revealing Barb inside. Moxxie asks, "Do you know her?" "Do I know her? That's my sister, fuckface!" That's... oddly repetitive, writers. I get that Moxxie wouldn't immediately make the connection since Barb's disguised as a human, but there's a more graceful way to handle that in the dialogue. Something like, "Is this her?" "Oh, now you're on the ball!"

-In an earlier post I expressed concern that these writers wouldn't handle Barb's addiction well, and I'm somewhat relieved they didn't go into it. But I also predicted she'd amount to a genderbent Blitzo instead of having her own personality, and... well...

Overindulges in addictive substances? Check. Runs a business that requires travel to the human world? Check. Pottymouth? Check. Uses sexuality as leverage? Check.

It would've been nice to at least get a hint about what Blitzo did to make her hate him so much (and perhaps confronting that would make him rethink how he treats Moxxie-?), but I guess we'll have to find out when she comes back in seven episodes or so. Yaaaaay.

-Barb says she picked this particular human as her supplier because teenagers are easy to manipulate, but she really had no way to accomplish that other than flashing her panties at him? Assuming Barb and Blitzo are the same age, she's in her 30s, and... it's just a tad creepy and uncalled for, even if this kid's legal. That's a pretty big age (and power) gap regardless. This is one of those times when it looks a lot more predatory when you switch the genders, but, importantly, women can be predators too. Bad optics, y'all.

-The climactic fight scenes in prior episodes were snappy and exciting, but this one's pacing felt really sluggish. I get that the song in the background had a slower tempo than we're used to in these action scenes, but would it have been so hard to double-time the animation? Also, previous fight scenes were notable for their creative choreography, but Barb wrapped her tail around Moxxie twice in a row. Having trouble coming up with new fight moves, guys? Like damn, she's an acrobat. She could do so much more.

-In another edition of "characters being idiots because plot", Moxxie and Millie make out in front of everyone who thinks they're related. They couldn't have run off to somewhere more private?? Apparently no; this needed to happen so Millie's internet fame would be dashed... or, here's another option: Show how the internet popularity cycle is so damn short that everyone's already moved on to the next sensation. You could have made that funny if you actually put in some effort. Like... The faux-incest was just so unnecessary.

-Much like Murder Family, another unfunny ending where Moxxie's dreams are crushed. Blitzo gets his hopes up only to call him a "fuckin' disgrace". But remember, guys: He'S HArd oN hiM BEcauSE hE CAreS! (Fuck it, I think I'll just edit a supercut of every time Blitzo has berated Moxxie, pre- and post-Truth Seekers.)

Oh and look, Millie's glaring at Blitzo, which is totally the same as opening her mouth to tell him off like he deserves, right?

She'll take on a whole gang of mobsters out of love for Moxxie, but standing up to Blitzo? Whoa, that's a step too far. Y'know, because he's the writers' favorite and he shouldn't have to experience any complications from his behavior. Same old story as it's been for a season and a half.

This ending would've been a million times better if it left off on a cliffhanger. Maybe this could have been Moxxie's final breaking point. After Blitzo calls him a disgrace, Moxxie could take a deep breath and...

MOXXIE: (flatly) I quit.

Then he walks out of the room. Everyone looks after him, stunned. When he closes the door, the screen cuts to black and the credits roll.

Oh shit, what's going to happen next? How will Blitzo deal with this? How will it affect Moxxie and Millie's home life? What kind of new job will Moxxie find to keep food on the table? Will he ever come back to IMP, or will Blitzo find a replacement? I know these writers aren't too interested in serialization or any sense of continuity outside of the stupid romance subplot (or hell, inside it), but good god, it would give viewers some exciting possibilities to look forward to.

This episode had so much potential and followed through on none of it. "Unhappy Campers" turned out to be a more fitting title than expected, as that's exactly what I was while watching this.

(Also this show needs a continuity coordinator like yesterday.)

#helluva boss #helluva critical #critique #criticism #review #writing #long post

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thisismeracing · 1 year

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King of my heart | MS47 | part. 06

Pairing: hamilton!reader (she/her) x mick schumacher

Warnings: curse words, twitter environment, mention of food, not proofread etc etc. Minors DNI!

summary: after a week away for work, Y/n is back to follow the race calendar and this time she decided to join the drivers party. What a bit of alcohol and a week away from Mick could do to her? Hopefully, nothing that exposes their situation too much.

a/n: none of the pictures used are mine, they are all from Pinterest and other apps. everything else is made up by me and I do not give permission for it to be published on a different platform. I would appreciate it if those things could be taken into consideration 💛

part. 05 | series masterlist | part. 07

theofficialyn

liked by mickschumacher, pierregasly, and others

theofficialyn Such an amazing day wearing Valentino! 💗 But today’s tip is: don’t do a photoshoot with your older brother, he will absolutely make you laugh all the time 🧍🏾‍♀️

view all 9,456 comments

violadavis Love you two!!!! 💗

⤷ htgawmfan What multiverse is this???? Queen Viola and the Hamiltons?! Im here for it!!!

maisonvalentino we loved the laughing shots, such a great duo 💘

ynfashion Please, tell me Valentino is gonna update more stuff because I’m starving for content and you guys keep feeding me crumbs *cries in obsessive*

lewismerc the fact that Lewis kept making her laugh is so pure

lewishamilton 😜

⤷ theofficialyn blocked!

⤷ sunshineferrari I wanna be their friend so bad

pierregasly Charles was so jealous, he said you should invite him next time!

⤷ lewishamilton tell him she’s MY sister, he have two brothers

⤷ charles_leclerc exactly I have two brothers and now one sister 😇

⤷ tifosiitaly the way charles is getting under Lewis’ skin is sending me HAHAHAHAH

fan2 💘💘💘💘💘💘

hate123 Funny how it's outed that she’s Lewis's sister and suddenly she’s representing Valentino…

⤷ theofficialyn LOL My shoe brand has had a partnership with Valentino for years now, this is nothing new 😘

⤷ popyn yes, queen! put these haters to sleep

lewishamilton

liked by justinbieber, mercedesamgf1, and others

lewishamilton Grateful for the invitation from Valentino 💖 I had a great time! (And yes, YN was absolutely judging)

view all 7,983 comments

theofficialyn not funny, delete!!!

sirlewis9 Lewis, I hate to break it to you, but both of you were judging

charleslechair The banter is so older brother energy. I love them

danielricciardo Looking good, mate! 🖤

maisonvalentine 💘 An honor to have you two!

theofficialyn added to her story

paddockgossip

liked by yndisney, and others

paddockgossip Y/n and Mick are at the same party and rumor has it they are looking pretty cozy, all hugs and sharing drinks. If you have more tea our dms are open!

view all 3,209 comments

1990yn where are these pics from?

⤷ fortyfourlewis mick’s from lando’s story and yn’s is from lilys (alex’s gf)

sainzcentury Schumi boy is looking good. Go get your man, yn!!!

gaslygaslight patintly waiting for the videos from the party so I can scan one by one looking for yn and mick kissing in the background 🙏🏾

⤷ user1 LMAO can you imagine?

mickmercedes I wanted to be at this party so bad 😭 can you imagine their energy while drunk????? unmatched!

mickschumacher added to his story

this story was deleted

theofficialyn

liked by pierregasly, mickschumacher, and others

theofficialyn Great night but not so great morning 👎🏾

view all 6,230 comments

illicitaffairs2 not the noodle in the car on her way to the paddock ☠️

lewishamilton water and sun waiting for you in here, the best cure

⤷ theofficialyn please, I’m going for a swin with rocks inside my pockets 🤒

pierregasly the best party partner ever!!!

⤷ charles_leclerc excuse me?

ynnature can you imagine being hungover and having to hear the vroom vroom from the paddock all the time??? lmfao

⤷ f1sainz but theyre not racing, just training and general work stuff

⤷ paddockprincess its still loud tho

lilymhe ILY!!!

********************

If you liked it, make sure to like and reblog <3 feel free to talk to me as well, my inbox is always open! And I will start a taglist on my posts, to be part of it you just gotta comment/send an ask saying so, and most important: have your age in your profile (I don’t interact with minors!). See you guys next post! <3

wanna be tagged on my stories? click here

#mick schumacher imagine #black!reader #f1 imagine #social media au f1 #hamilton!reader #mick schumacher social media au #mick schumacher x reader #black!reader f1 #f1 imagines #mick schumacher x black!reader #mick schumacher x you #ms47

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joyce-stick · 1 year

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Suzume Isn't Gay, But We Liked It Anyway

Despite not being as gay as Shinkai might have tried to make it during its development, Suzume is still quite a good film which we enjoyed immensely on account of its characters, compelling narrative, visual beauty, thought-provoking themes, and the improvements observed over Shinkai's previous two films. So this an essay about Suzume, about why it's good, what its themes are, and our glowing recommendation.

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Transcript under the cut.

Previous video essay/transcript: Audrey's Best Girls Winter 2023

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Citations!

Baron, Reuben. “Director Makoto Shinkai on the Anime Artistry of Suzume - Exclusive Interview.” Looper, Static Media, 12 Apr. 2023, https://www.looper.com/1254434/director-makoto-shinkai-anime-artistry-suzume-exclusive-interview/.

Brzeski, Patrick. “Makoto Shinkai on How Anime Blockbuster 'Suzume' Reflects the Current State of Japan: ‘the Most Honest Expression I Could Put on Screen.’” The Hollywood Reporter, Penske Media Corporation, 7 Mar. 2023, https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-features/makoto-shinkai-interview-suzume-anime-berlin-2023-1235329404/.

Pulliam-Moore, Charles. “Makoto Shinkai Wants Suzume to Build a Bridge of Memory between Generations.” The Verge, Vox Media, 15 Apr. 2023, https://www.theverge.com/2023/4/15/23678724/makoto-shinkai-suzume-interview.

Jackson, Destiny. “Director Makoto Shinkai on the Tender Resonance and Maturity of Making 'Suzume': ‘I Think about How to Dig Deeper so I Can Emotionally Move People in My Vicinity.’” Deadline, Penske Media Corporation, 15 Apr. 2023, https://deadline.com/2023/04/suzume-makoto-shinkai-japanese-anime-weathering-with-you-your-name-1235325691/.

https://twitter.com/ao8l22/status/1513116464210919425

https://twitter.com/moogy0/status/1592346490315640836

I had a few good reasons to assume I would hate Suzume.

We've seen three of Shinkai’s films. Yes, those three. We liked Your Name quite a bit when we saw it in theaters, but its flaws became apparent on a rewatch a few years later. We did not like Weathering With You, which made its flaws apparent to us rather immediately. Never watched it since watching it the first time, but, I don't know, maybe we'll go back to it.Still, thinking about that film had us pissed off for a little while, although we're less pissed off now, for reasons we might get to later. So, when we went to watch Suzume, I was reasonably expecting to hate it, or, even worse, enjoy it, while seeing some intractable flaw in it that ticked me off immensely about it.

And… I found none! I mean, maybe I'll think of one later, but my current opinion of Suzume, as I write this hours after having seen it, (and speak it, 'bout a couple days after having written this) is that it was a pretty good film with a lot of breathtaking visuals, funny moments, some emotional bits, and no real huge flaws to speak of. In fact, not only does this film lack the biggest flaws of its predecessors, it's also got a few things about it that I appreciate more.

First thing I liked immediately: Girl. I mean, her name, is the title. It's no secret that we of the joystick system appreciate beautiful anime girls, and this particular such beautiful anime girl is good, both as the protagonist of the film who does all the proactive things to save the guy, which is different from the last two movies where the guy did all the stuff. I'm not gonna pretend like Shinkai is suddenly some kind of feminist icon now for correctly giving a female character some goddamn agency, but: it's a nice touch for us personally, given that… we like girls. It helps that Suzume is emotional and interesting and funny and has a pretty good arc through the movie and her voice actress does a good job- no, we did not watch the dub. I'll probably talk a bit more about her later, but I think she's good.

I think it's important to mention with regards to this girl, that she was, apparently, supposed to be gay. This information came to light in the English speaking anime community after a Japanese entertainment journalist tweeted a tweet sayin’ as much, and then professional translator Moogy went and tweeted about it in turn, citing this journalist as a source. I can’t find that this chain goes back any further than that, although I tried to out of personal interest, because, if I had, then I would’ve been able to write that into the Wikipedia page- which, I DID CHECK, and it briefly mentions that -

Okay, so, since writing that, another, Wikipedia-admissible, source, in the English language, emerged, in which Shinkai is interviewed, and confirms this to be true. So as such, I added that information to the article, with that source. Look. There it is! And it’s still there, probably, unless someone removed it while I was making the video.

In this interview, the interviewer asks Shinkai directly about this, and he says, “I’m surprised you know it! I’ve only told Japanese interviewers about it!” Clearly Shinkai is unaware of the power of Moogy. So, he goes onto say, that, yes, it was his initial idea for a companion, and that the theoretical character who Souta replaced would’ve been Suzume’s onee-san crush; that’s how I’m taking this whole ‘sisterhood romance’ thing. He thought he’d done enough with the boy meets girl thing, and he wanted to try doing something else.

His producer rejected it, because, in Shinkai’s translated words, “You may be tired of these romantic stories, but your audience loves it,” which, I believe, is a polite way of saying “I don’t think a gay film will sell.” The chair thing was chosen to “not make it too much of a romance”.

Shinkai further says— and this part kinda gets me— that he doesn’t think the story would’ve changed if it had been gay, or if Suzume had been a boy or non-binary or whatever. Quote:

“It's not necessarily the context of male/female; it's about a human overcoming something. In my future films as well, I want to focus on that human story as opposed to too much commentary on gender or sex.”

So, my reading of this response, and, take this with a grain of salt because it’s only my personal interpretation, is that while Shinkai was interested in making a gay film as a change of pace, he did not consider it important enough to insist on. There were other things he wanted to make the movie about, and he didn’t want to die on the gay hill.

And, y’know, that’s a shame, but I think it’s fair enough. I would have liked to see the alternate timeline where no one stopped him from making the film gay, but if it wasn’t already clear, I like the film that we got, and I don’t fault Shinkai for having other priorities as a director, like, for instance, getting his film funded and keeping his job. And honestly, I can halfway see the merit in not making it a gay film, because then it’d be a lot harder to, y’know, address the themes, without addressing whatever gay discourse there’d be that overshadows the themes.

I don’t say this to be like, “ooh, the film would’ve just been gay and that would’ve been bad,” it would’ve been good for the film to be gay, I just mean that a lot of the time people are more concerned about there being representation rather than the quality of the story in which the representation exists and it becomes the gay thing, rather than, the thing that happens to be gay, and that’s not always great. I mean, I guess we are getting a little bit of that just off of the knowledge that the film could have been gay, but at least I don’t have to think about talking about it too much past this point, because it’s, y’know, not actually in the film.

Shinkai said other stuff, too, I guess, about the animation and how the characters have different color palettes for daytime and evening and night scenes, which explains the very convincingly presented amusement park scene, that happens at night! So that was interesting.

Anyway, that’s the addendum I have about that, I’m gonna go back to the rest of this:

I have no idea if this would've been good for the film or not, but we have a different video being written about gay pandering, so, let’s move on then I guess!

The second thing that we liked was the film's opening minutes. And to explain why this is, I need to give a bit of context, I think. So, in short, after the 2011 nuclear meltdown and earthquake that irreversibly forever changed Japan and the life of all the people living there (and also delayed Madoka Magica's finale), Shinkai apparently decided that he wanted to make a bunch of films about it. About three so far, to be exact. Which, y'know, is not a bad motivation for making films. It's certainly a better motivation than I had to write this video

So, as such, his last three films are a novel fusion of wacky comedy, coming of age romantic melodrama, and disaster film. Your Name and Weathering With You had really slow buildups to the disaster part of the disaster film, to the point that mentioning it is almost a spoiler, but I'm going to assume it isn't because everyone has now seen those films. So they have a whole first half where it's just kind of weird supernatural romantic comedy slice of life hijinks but then it abruptly tone shifts in the second half.

This is actually, I think, the source of both of these films' major issues. It's kinda cool to watch them the first time and then see the story's tone shift when the mid movie plot twist happens, introducing the big disaster scenario aspect of the story along with it, but the drawback to that approach is that you have, in essence, a movie whose plot twist is that it becomes a different movie. This both contributes to the odd tonal whiplash and also means that the supernatural disaster part of the film is weaker and not as well fleshed out as it could be.

Suzume, on the other hand, smartly introduces the main conflict of the story in the first act of the movie. This choice is good. The serious existential threat to Japan stuff that the film is about is the immediate focus of the film. This allows for a more balanced tone, as then the movie can comfortably use its comedic parts to add levity to its treatment of that harrowing topic, rather than the existential stuff comin' in like a sledgehammer to break a previously comfortable tone- which, I should say, IS a thing you can do, and IS a valid choice to tell a story, I just don’t think it was necessarily a choice that Shinkai handled well before. The pacing is much improved, as the supernatural aspects of the film are more evenly developed and the story has more time to explain itself. Mostly. There's like one scene I don't get. I’ll get to it?

Anyway, the end result of this choice is that Suzume feels like a much more focused and complete film, rather than two halves of different films. Aaaaaand, I appreciate this! A lot. I can see this choice maybe maybe maybe making the movie less interesting to some people, because it's paced more like a normal movie than Shinkai's other previous two romantic comedy disaster movies, but, hey, I think it's nice that Shinkai seems to be growing as an artist and a writer and a filmmaker, who made a normal movie that didn’t leave us confused, and disoriented, and confused, about what it’s about

Other things I like… I like the visuals. The animations and backgrounds and visual effects and the CG are all pretty fire. Suzume is generally a really beautiful film! We all knew this, but, really, it's really good. I like the chair thing. I like the way that the chair is animated. Apparently the animation of the chair was inspired by Luxo Jr., y’know, the Pixar short that became the origin of the Pixar lamp, and… yeah, I can see it. It definitely does have that old Pixar vibe of “inanimate object moving like a very real human inanimate object” that that has. I just like the way the legs move, and the way it emotes so convincingly with these subtle but credible motions.

There’s one scene involving a roller coaster that- that scene is incredible, that’s definitely one of the most visually novel sequences in all of Shinkai’s films that we’ve seen. I like the character design of the guy, Souta, also? When he’s not a chair, I mean. I dunno. The last two guy characters in the last Shinkai films looked like generic anime boys, but this guy looks like the kind of guy who I can believe a woman would find attractive. I like the look of his hair, I like how grizzled he is, I like his long gray coat, I like that you can look at this tired hunk of a man and immediately see that he’s been places and that he’s carrying some shit with him. Bonus points for that he looks like one of the Monogatari exorcists.

As for Suzume! Well, her design is maybe a bit generic, but… she’s a girl. It’s not like our standards are too high for girls. She’s supposed to be an ordinary girl, and, y’know, in this movie contrasting with this dude and then this chair, that works out well. And also, I appreciate that she rotates her outfits throughout the movie. My headmates and I love to see a woman change her clothes, not necessarily directly. I’m just saying, that denim jacket thing she had going on in Kobe, and when she lost her shoes in Tokyo and then borrowed Souta’s boots? Specifically borrowing the boots, because, the only pair of shoes that we own looks like this:

It’s a small thing, but like, Shinkai couldn’t make Suzume gay. Widespread trans representation in anime is a bit far off. I might well be eating off the floor conjuring table scraps pointing at a woman in a man’s shoes and saying “oi, isn’t it gender?” But like, 1, it’s a woman wearing a man’s shoes, and 2, yes, it is gender. And we like the gender. You cannot stop us! We did get to see the movie a second time with a friend, (thank you for seeing the movie with us, and reviewing our script!) and she insisted that the boots are femme coded, and, we disagree, unfortunately. I’m sorry, we cannot see these boots as anything but gender.

However! It is Shinkai’s fault that Onimai exists. That scene in Onimai is definitely influenced by that scene in Your Name. We know this because Nekotofu said so in interviews. Onimai is very good and based and funny, and this is a fact upon which I, and all of my headmates, equally quite agree. It’s nice to agree on something with all of yourself. SPEAKING, of the opening scene in Your Name:

Shinkai did not sexualize Suzume. So, if you hated that scene of Your Name, there’s none of that! There’s no chair peeping on Suzume or anything like that. So, if that knowledge helps you somehow, now you know.

Long story short. Should you watch Suzume. Well, yes obviously. By the time this video comes out, or, by the time you're seeing it, its theatrical run might be over, but like, if it’s not, then, yes, I recommend going and seeing it, like, today. And if it is, then remember to see it whenever it’s on blu-ray or streaming services or your local cat-themed anime distributor. Shinkai made a normal movie. I hope he makes an abnormally good movie next time. I believe in this man. Again. Somewhat. It’s not like it really matters what I say or think, but I do also hope that his next movie is just gay. I won’t matter, to me, or, to us, if his next movie is just a carbon copy of Suzume, but gay. I mean, he got away with making a heterosexual Your Name once after making the heterosexual Your Name. There is nothing stopping him. Except for the pigheaded businessmen who he may have to argue with.

Anyways, that’s that, I guess I’m going to talk more specifically about the plot now, so, if you didn’t see the movie, then, leave, now, if you care. If you did see the movie, or do not plan to see the movie, then, uh, don’t leave. Please. I’m going to put the Patreon credits here. It is not the end of the video. Please do not leave.

Intermission for extra thoughts and Patreon credits!

Hello everyone. This is Audrey, of the joystick system. The name of the brain that I’m the lead woman of. We’re still a plural system, as I’ve not forgotten, thanks to Luci and all my headmates.

As I already think I said, we saw Suzume a second time with a friend. As of this speaking, it continues to play in movie theaters, at least where we are, although it’s not showing nearly as often and probably not in as many places. Nonetheless, if it’s still playing in your area, I obviously very much recommend it. If you have the time and money to see it a second time after seeing it the first time, I think you should see it a second time. Because it’s good!

One thing I’d really like to change about this video, overall, is the tone of it. I think it came off way too much as “oh yeah, Suzume’s actually pretty good”, because I walked in with muted expectations, and then walked out feeling like it was pretty good but also kind of waiting for it to hit me that it’s actually bad… And, no, no, it’s an absolutely fantastic film and I imagine is probably going to line up with our top 5 movies of the year. Although, it’s not like we watch a lot of movies, so it probably won’t have too stiff of a competition. A different friend of ours saw it, and they absolutely loved it and had a lot of really good things to say that just made us like it more- so, yeah, no, Suzume is fantastic. Please watch Suzume. If you can.

I think I also should say, I disagree pretty strongly with the assertion that Suzume is “the same film” as Your Name and Weathering With You. As I’ve already said, the structure is much more cohesive in how it introduces the plot without the plot becoming the plot twist of the plot, and also there’s just a lot of improvements on writing and characterization and storytelling and the film is generally much more tonally consistent than either Your Name or Weathering With You. Sure, it’s a similar overall plot to both of those films, but I think there’s just as much merit in iterating on old ideas as there is in introducing new ones, and Suzume does a healthy amount of both. Maybe it’s a remake of the same movie, but if that’s so, Suzume is definitely the best version of that movie, and I think the growth Shinkai went through as a director and writer to get there is crystal clear.

And as I hope I’m about to make clear, the thematic weight of the film is much stronger as well. The decreased focus on the romance subplot helped a whole lot in that regard, I think, to bring the themes into greater focus, and like, gosh, is the film REALLY THEMATICALLY GOOD on top of being so well structured and written and visually spectacular. I walked into Suzume expecting it to be bad, I spent like two weeks while writing the script and making the video trying to think of flaws in this movie, and I can really only think of like two, which are one, that it’s not gay, and two, that some minor plot details are maybe a small bit inscrutable.

But neither of those things actively bring the film down! It’s just great! And, if we had the time to watch the film a third time and then do a complete rewrite of the script, I’d probably change the tone I took with it, but y’know what, I gotta say a thing, I’ve left people waiting long enough, this movie won’t be in theaters forever, so, it’s good enough, and good enough is perfectly good enough.

Also. The music was really good. It was a lot less intrusive than in Your Name and Weathering With You. Those two films really love going all ham on their mid-movie insert song sequences? In Suzume, the music is, the musical score, which is really really good and is used really extremely effectively in, specifically the chair chase scene, and the amusement park scene, and the opening of the film, and the big Tokyo scene, and really the whole film. It was just really very good.

And, other than that, I think I mentioned everything I wanted to mention in the script, so, uh yeah, that's that!

So, before we get back to the video, channel housekeeping. I don’t think we’re going to be able to keep doing videos, at least not regularly, as things are going. If you’re not already aware of the disaster life we lead, we’ve been aimlessly floating around quasi-homeless and unemployed, for about our entire adult life, and spent around three years crashing at a friend’s place, for longer than we should’ve been because of executive dysfunction, burnout, and general mental illness. And also money.

Most of the stuff we’ve been making our videos with, including our desktop PC, was stuff we got before we were quasi-disowned by our parents, almost, uh, six (note: four or five) years ago? and the rest of it is stuff we have, very not hyperbolically, emptied our bank account for because we kinda needed it. So, if that stuff breaks, and it’s going to eventually, we’ll be on even more hiatus until further notice. Obviously this is pretty untenable, so, we’re going to have to try to get a job, and I don’t see great odds of that working out for our transgender neurodivergent failwomanchild self, and it’s obviously going to mean we have less time to make videos and write things. Naturally the stress of our unstable situation has already been doing that job, but. Y’know.

So, if you want to help even our odds: Ko-fi or Patreon. That is currently our only steady source of income, and even a little bit extra would make a pretty big difference for us day-to-day. You can send us monthly donations through either, although, they take a smaller cut on Ko-fi, so, there’s that. Ko-fi is also the place for giving us money one time as opposed to regularly.

As for what you get out of this, well, besides the obvious your name here and access to our discord, you will earn our gratitude and also we will feel indebted to you, which will lead us to try our best to keep making things. And also if you ever encounter us in person, we’ll give you a hug, if you want one, as long as you’re not, like, creepy about it.

Is that everything? Um. Yeah. That is everything. Here's all the names of all the important people who...

Thanks to our generous Patreon backers:

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And, that’s that. Thanks to all of you, named onscreen and vocally, and also those of you not named but who’ve been watching, or encouraging us personally, for your support. Now, back to the normal part of the video. Spoilers for Suzume from here on, obviously.

Intermission over!!!

Okay, so, spoilers.

Plot of this movie! I’m just gonna steal bits of the Wikipedia summary, because I don’t want to write a plot summary myself and get waylaid.

Suzume Iwato is a 17-year-old high school girl who lives with her maternal aunt in Kyushu. One night, she dreams of searching for her mother (who, it's inferred later, died in a tsunami) as a child in a ruined neighborhood. The next morning, while headed for school, Suzume encounters a young man searching for abandoned areas with doors. He then is cursed to turn into a chair by a kitty cat who desires love and she runs away from home with him, and he explains that these doors in all these abandoned places are doors to an alternate dimension that occasionally let out supernatural beings called worms that do earthquakes, and they need to do the right rituals to close the door properly. So their journey across Japan to prevent the earthquakes and also get Souta back out of being a chair, thusly begins.

First of all, I think that Shinkai did an excellent job conveying the pain of losing one’s mother. I say this, because, uh, we have also lost our mother, and grieved her loss. She’s not dead, in case you’re wondering, she’s just a worthless piece of human garbage. So, I guess it’s a little perverse to compare our being estranged from our shitty nuclear family as a result of the events of our entire life up until we were twenty to Suzume losing her single mom in a natural disaster when she was four, but I can’t pretend that the former experience did not lend itself to us empathizing with her, in general. Like, we did definitely cry. That’s a thing that we did.

I also like how cleanly the movie conveys this information within a few minutes. Like, you get the opening sequence of the small Suzume searching for her mother in the Ever After, and then she wakes up a seventeen year old, and you hear her address the woman who is her guardian by that woman’s first name, and it immediately clicks, "ohhhh… orphan, got it, got it, got it," and yeah. In contrast to the previous two films where Shinkai took half the damn movie establishing what these characters’ lives and their relationships with their friends and relatives were like, this kind of storytelling efficiency (which, is present throughout the film, in establishing Souta's relationships as well) is impressive.

And like I said, I like the immediacy with which the plot begins, with Suzume meeting Souta, being asked about the ruins, and then going to check them out herself. I like that there's not a whole album of insert songs in this movie, no fancy opening cinematic, no big deal montage, just a smash cut to the opening title card while Souta and Suzume are trying to close the door in the old bathhouse. It's clean. It's real good.

So, then Suzume tries to patch Souta up when he gets injured, and then he gets cursed by this cat to become a chair, and then the movie gets further good! Suzume runs away from home to help Chair Souta capture this important cat that's supposed to be keeping the earthquakes from happening. And this greatly aggrieves her aunt Tamaki, who's just been trying her best her whole life and everything and I will say, um-

I'm going to get to that!

So, one thing I have to say specifically- I had not read any details about Suzume's plot or interviews from Shinkai before seeing it, and I kind of got the whole deal immediately with everywhere that an earthquake comes out of being an abandoned place of gathering. A closed bathhouse, school, amusement park. This all feels very harrowing to see onscreen- as an American! even though it's clearly intended as commentary on Japan's population decline, because, uh, have you heard of dead malls

If they ever do an American live action version of Suzume, it'll be about them visiting abandoned shopping malls, probably. please do not do that

But yeah, like, we live in Portland, Oregon, and compared to having grown up in pre-covid Philadelphia most of our life, post-covid Portland feels like a ghost town. Like, it's not actually, there's obviously still people who live here, and I don't mean that derogatorily because we love Portland and we'd like to keep living here, if possible, not the least because we get easy access to HRT. But like, there's a lot of closed and abandoned places in Portland, so many empty areas and business that have been boarded up and closed to the point that at times, wandering through downtown Portland almost feels like living in an open world video game where most of the buildings don't have designed interiors.

Places that all clearly closed within the last three or four years, with their signage up and everything. Places that are left in stasis to lie disused or else be reclaimed by the homeless until the homeless get chased out by the cops. It's all just really… eughf. It makes us sad to see this place, this whole country really, be stuck in this kind of disgusting degradation while our government fails to provide for us, let alone adapt to the challenges ahead of us, just leaves all these places where people lived, where people are living, now, to stagnate and stand like zombies of a past we can't go back to

There’s a scene in Heathers, one of our favorite movies of all time, where the main antagonist J.D. has a whole emotional reflection on how the stability of this franchised commercial convenience store enterprise has kept him feeling like there’s continuity in his life, and like, yeah, that’s kind of a feeling.

[Video ID: J.D. (played by Christian Slater), a black haired edgy looking teenage boy of about 16-17 wearing a long black jacket, paces about the convenience store "Snappy Snack Shack", speaking in an affected hard to place accent, to Veronica Sawyer (played by Winona Ryder), a brown-haired teenage girl of around the same age, who is wearing a grey dress that exposes her shoulders accompanied by a blue flower brooch on her chest, and black overalls)]

Veronica: I see you know your convenience speak pretty well.

J.D.: Yeah, well, uh, I've been moved around all my life. Dallas. Baton Rouge, Vegas... Sherwood, Ohio. There's always been a Snappy Snack Shack. Any town, any time, pop a ham and cheese in the microwave and feast on a Turbo Dog. Keeps me sane.

Veronica: Really?

Like, it’s eugh, because, obviously as an anticapitalist, we kinda dislike these sorts of places, the shopping centers, the strip malls, the gas stations, we're against all of this bullshit on principle these places are all kind of intensely hostile to… life, in general.

But also, these places are a part of the world we live in, and they are stable! Relatively. They are kind of the only way we've known the world to be. And it’s sad to see that stability be ever so more greatly upset by the pandemic and the… everything, with nothing on the horizon to replace it. And if and when we see this kind of stability disappear completely, it’ll be sad, even if it’s replaced by something better. We’ll probably miss something about wandering these gross, heavily commercialized disgustingly homogenized nightmare places that’ve been cannibalizing our communities this whole time. Yeah, we hate it, but... it’s where we live, and we’re not immune to nostalgia.

Nostalgia is just a nicer word for grief

And this same very such eughf feeling is very much echoed in Suzume. There’s this deep and palpable grief for these places and the people who used to live here felt in this film, and inherent in expressing that grief is Shinkai’s expression of the, y’know, important stage of grief, i.e., acceptance. Because, to close the doors, Suzume and Souta have to not just, close it, but also think of all the feelings and experiences of the people who used to live in these places, and then… let go.

When the amusement park scene happens, the ferris wheel starts moving, and Suzume is drawn in by the image of the ghosts of the people who once rode it, Souta starts yelling for her to stop, to not go in- not the least because she can’t see what she’s doing and is putting herself in danger, but also because she cannot go back. Those people who used to sit in that ferris wheel, laughing, crying, living, in this place, cannot come back. Suzume can’t go back. This past can’t be gone back to.

Okay, so, one thing I missed when I saw the film the second time. When Suzume was drawn into the Ever After through the ferris wheel door, she was seeing herself of the future in there, and that, was foreshadowing the end of the film. I’m keeping this part anyway because the emotional impact of that scene was still as described even if this plot foreshadowing bit was something I missed the first time seeing the film.

I read a few English language interview articles with Shinkai talking about Suzume right after seeing the film, both because I wanted clarification before I ran my mouth on two things. 1, I wanted clarification on what the cat wanted. I’ll get to him. 2, I wanted to be sure my interpretation of the doors thing was on point, which it was. Shinkai talks in one of these interviews about how when covid was happening and Japan was still trying to have the Olympics happen, it felt really irresponsible and bad, and he did not agree with this. He says, and I quote,

“You were opening this new door and not sure of what’s on the other side without bringing closure or understanding or coming to terms with what’s behind you. I want to say a lot of the Japanese population felt the same way. There was this kind of awkward air about us, and it really wasn’t time to open new doors without first reflecting on what came before us.”

And like, yeah, I agree. I just really, really agree with this. It is indeed what I took away from the film before I read this interview. Suzume spends this entire movie reflecting on the past and trying to grow beyond that and ultimately the one door that she opens, on purpose, is the one that she decides to open intentionally after reflecting on what brought her to this point and deciding what she needs to do and

Eugghhhh

I’m just saying, it worked. It really did work. For us, at least.

Now, to be clear: Japan and the United States are two different countries, and, while there are similarities in how the pandemic left our societies, they're ultimately two different societies, and I don't really know jack shit about Japanese society- I'm just relating, my feelings, of my experience, uh, our experience, as an American, to the feelings that we took away from Suzume.

And... even if I understand this all right. If the people who need to see this sort of message saw it, or, like, took that away, or acted on it when it did... that’d be nice, but ultimately I don’t think that Suzume will move any politician or other person in power making these decisions in Japan, or any country, enough, or in the right ways, to have any impact on policy. But y’know, Shinkai’s just a guy making movies, and I’m just one of the various split personalities of a deranged F-list anime YouTuber, so whatever. Such is life. It’s at least a nice sentiment.

So, the other things, in no particular order. I did cry a bit when Daijin, the cat, got sucked up back into the keystone. He’s hard to like at the start of the film, for, y’know, the reasons why he is, but ultimately when you consider that like… he’s been trapped that way, the same way as Souta spends trapped as a chair, for years? Centuries, for all we goddamn know? Once that clicks, it’s really hard to not empathize with him. And yeah, he might be a god now, I guess, but who knows if he was a person before, or, what even, and just, I think, I think if you spend god knows how long as a sacred relic keeping Japan from being destroyed by earthquakes, you at least, at least, maybe, maybe deserve, if nothing else, a little pet.

[pets microphone]

that was your little pet.

In one of the other interviews Shinkai did, he talked about how Souta becoming a chair, and also a Keystone sealing away the earthquakes, is intended as a metaphor for the experience of pandemic lockdown. It’s not a directly equivalent analogy, but, like, it does make sense! Souta is being forced into a position of being confined, to keep this dangerous and virtually uncontrollable force of nature under control, for the greater good and long-term preservation of society. And when you consider that Daijin was in the same position for gosh knows how the hell long, it makes it a lot easier to empathize with him! He wasn’t being malicious, exactly, not, willfully anyway, he knew that vacating his position was putting everyone else at risk, but, he did it anyway cause he just kinda snapped, like, fuck this, I want to go outside! That does make a lot of sense! Also it sticks out, also, when Suzume screams at Daijin, because that’s, y’know. It’s a whole scene. I feel like I want to say something about this! But I can't really land on anything to say about it? But yeah.

I think the whole thing with Suzume needing to sacrifice Souta midway through the movie is really well done. It’s extremely funny to me that Shinkai apparently thought to stress this point of the movie as how important it is for her to make this difficult choice because of how people criticized Weathering With You for not really being meaningfully critical of the consequence of Hodaka un-sacrificing Hina? And also that Hina never really gets a choice in being un-sacrificed, far as I remember, so... [whispers] that’s a little unintentionally sexist,

but whatever. I’d have to watch the film again, and I don’t feel like doing that right now

Suzume’s aunt, Tamaki. I do like her. She’s a pretty level-headed guardian, as guardians go. I like that when she finds Suzume and Serizawa in the car, and sees that going to this door is important to Suzume, she’s not immediately like, “fuck your feelings, we’re going home”? She’s curious about the child under her care. She’s concerned in a way that she’s willing to not only go all the way to Tokyo, but also to follow Suzume the rest of the way to see what's up because she clearly understands, logically, that even if she doesn’t know what it is that’s compelled Suzume to go this distance, it must be something that she needs to sort the fuck out in order to move on with her life, and that’s kinda good?

Although I should note that while she clearly sees the pragmatic value in not fighting Suzume on this, she’s also pretty reluctant to. She has a line where she’s like to Serizawa while Suzume is asleep, let’s turn the fuck around and go back, she’ll give up. So, y’know, Tamaki’s at least more open-minded than our mom was!

Speaking of that. There’s this one scene in the film, where Tamaki loses her shit at Suzume. Goes on screaming on about how she hates Suzume and wants her life back, and then she runs off to Serizawa being all like “I think I’m losing it,” and it’s a whole thing. On our first viewing, this scene felt a little out of nowhere. It was a whole sudden shock to have this intense scene happen and then also its pivot back into the magical realism aspects of the film with the black cat’s appearance, which confused us a bit cause I don’t think that was really explained at all.

But, watching the film a second time, and seeing the arc of Tamaki’s frustration reaching its peak with the benefit of hindsight, it made more sense that she’d come to a rope’s end and flip out like this. She’s been chasing her niece all across Japan, she’s ridden for several hours in a busted convertible in the rain, she doesn’t even have a proper explanation, her coworker has raised to her that this might be a kidnapping scheme- I get it. It’s a scene that I get.

I still do not understand the role of the large black cat though. Our friend agreed that that part didn’t make a whole lot of sense. So, that didn’t change.

I think the reason why it felt out of nowhere to us the first time is because it was entirely too familiar to our real life experience. In the middle of Tamaki’s rant, Suzume responds by saying, “but you said, ‘you’re my daughter,’” referring to when Tamaki first took her in, and said that. And Tamaki snaps back, “I never said that.” Our mother also did this exact thing, vehemently denying that she said and did things that we definitely remembered her saying and doing. (There's a word for this, it's... it's called gaslighting!) Living with someone who denies you this much, who makes you question your memory and your sanity and your general perception of the world this much, by forcing their own grief onto you like this, is just… really, simply, awful.

Throughout our childhood, we heard our mom say similar shit to us numerous times. That we were a horrible incorrigible child, that she hated us for ruining her family, that she wished she’d aborted us— all those sorts of things. The tone of Tamaki’s unadulterated rage in this dialogue was all too familiar to those memories. So, yeah, on both viewings, we were, very uncomfortable. Even knowing it was coming the second time around, it kinda caused us to actively recoil in our seat, to the point that our friend who we were seeing it with noticed our reaction and held out a stuffed animal she’d brought with her for us to pet.

So, um, yeah, that specific scene may or may not have triggered the PTSD that we may or may not have.

Tamaki does apologize for this later!

And she also, debatably, gets a bit of a pass for this since she’s not Suzume’s mother, and thus cannot reasonably wish that she had aborted Suzume, but can instead wish that she’d not done the unambiguously good deed of keeping Suzume out of the Japanese child welfare system, which, I can’t imagine is a good experience for a child. I don’t imagine any country’s child welfare system under capitalism to be a good experience for a child, but, y’know. Well, we’re also kind of entirely opposed to the traditional family structure and the basic premise of parents in general, because giving only one or two people total power over a vulnerable young human life is not an ethical tradition to have in any case, but… eugh. That’s something for some other video.

In an interview with Deadline, Shinkai talks about this scene, specifically quoting the “give me back my life” part, and he says that on some level, all parents feel that way to their kids. And that while he acknowledges that it isn’t by any means acceptable to ever say that kind of stuff to a child, it is, y’know, a feeling that is there that he poured into it, and that he wanted to be there, for the parents in the audience who ever felt that way and regretted it. This is how we found out that Makoto Shinkai is apparently not single and does in fact have a child.

He also says, in this other interview with the Verge, that, he wanted the film to provide for an opportunity for people of different generations to emotionally connect with each other. So, in that context, I really understand why this scene is here. It’s serving the purpose of setting up that emotional bridge, that door between Suzume and Tamaki, these characters of two different generations who ultimately come to understand one another, with the hope that audiences in a similar emotional position might come away from the film having felt some sense of healing by way of, y’know, getting that. And also Shinkai talks about how the idealized nuclear family structure is not a thing that’s tenable or possible for a lot of families in Japanese society, and, it’s not very tenable for a lot of people in American society either!

So I recognize the intent of this scene. I think it’s commendable, even. If there is a parent and child out there who saw Suzume together on whom this had the intended impact, I think that that’s wonderful. I sincerely hope that they exist!

Even still… we, were a child, who regularly had this sort of thing said to our face by our real life mother, and tried, in good faith, many times over the years, to repair our increasingly fraught relationship with her, and failed. I am deeply, regrettably cynical about familial relationships because of our traumatic experience with our own family. Our mother is not the sort of person who would come to meaningfully empathize with us through seeing this film.

And we really fucking hate her, so… yeah, this scene is difficult to watch. It’s difficult for us personally to feel any sympathy for Tamaki when she’s saying that kind of stuff to Suzume, and once it was over I could only really kind of feel glad that it was over.

But! It’s not like it’s the film’s fault that our parents were bad. I don’t think our reaction was intended. It just happened! It just happens sometimes that different people other than who the thing was written for react to things differently. That doesn’t make the scene bad, or any less valuable to include. And I do think that Tamaki’s relationship with Suzume is portrayed pretty well and with a surprising degree of nuance! It’s good! Tamaki is a good character and she means well! And I do like what Shinkai said in that Verge interview about wanting to portray other family structures.

However I think that their relationship would work better if she was gay, because honestly, that entire “get out of my life” speech would hit a lot more and probably work a lot better in the context of being directed at a gay teenager rather than an assumed heterosexual one. But, hey, we thought we were heterosexual for most of our life, so, who’s to say much of anything!

Was there anything else I forgot to talk about? Um…

We cried at the end of the film, both times we saw it!

And also, while this film couldn’t have improved our relationship with our mother, it did serve as a very good bonding experience with our friend. I’m really glad we took her to see it. She really liked the scenes where Suzume sits and steps on Souta as a chair, that that was clever, that they took the opportunity to get away with that with him as a chair. And she also agreed that the chair in general was really well portrayed visually. She also cried! at the end. the heterosexual chair film made a lesbian cry. uh, two lesbians, cry. I’m not going to say anything more than that.

Thank you to everyone who watched this entire video. I have an excuse to do a bad job editing it now because there’s not that much footage of Suzume available and it’s all gonna get me copyright striked anyway

To summarize, Suzume Good. Suzume. Watch Suzume. I’ve been Audrey of the joystick system, and I did not hate Suzume. Thank you. Goodnight

#suzume #suzume no tojimari #suzume spoilers #video essay #youtube #joyce-stick #joystick system #your name #weathering with you

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skaruresonic · 6 months

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The idw discourse is so bad, I feel caught in the middle because each time I express how bad the storytelling is, in a new issue or how off model the characters are drawn, idw fans gang up on me. But on the other hand I don't want to be associated with the people who think think it's funny to tweet how Flynn should die or make weird assumptions about Stanley being a bad person ? Like that's weird and cruel. Hate their work not them as people.

I just decided to pretend the comic doesn't exist and it helps lol.

I'm sorry that happened to you. Idk if anyone else will tell you that, but I will, because I know how much it sucks.

One time, I saw a guy on Twitter blame us for his inability to criticize the book in what he believed was a much more "balanced" manner without getting harassed by people.

Digest that for a moment. It's our fault for other people's reaction to us. And instead of rubbing his brain cells together for a moment and questioning the reasons why this knee-jerk reaction occurs, or even reflecting on the fact that it occurs at all and perhaps realizing that the call is coming from inside the house, he fell back on old biases and decided it was the haters who were wrong.

The mental gymnastics on display here are unreal.

In this case, I think people are stumbling into the usual fallacious trap of assuming both sides carry equal weight, and thus believe that defaulting to a position of "neutrality" makes them morally superior somehow.

That's kind of what I hate about this fandom - the utter superciliousness. The rotten shit we as a fandom get up to (and no, being a little snarky in a reblog does not count as harassment) while proclaiming love and light uwu. Be nice to everyone, except those freaks over there.

"Neutrality" is in scare quotes here because it's not true neutrality, but a way of posturing to the in-group that you're not Like Us. As demonstrated by my Twitter-user anecdote, people around here don't want to say anything hater-flavored because it risks intense ostracization. That's why you have people jumping down your throat for presenting even mild criticisms. It'd be pathetic if it weren't so annoying.

I'm not talking about people who let well enough alone. I'm talking about centrists who sneer "both sides are bad," as if by distancing themselves from the situation in a smug manner, they're declaring themselves more enlightened than the rest of us.

Honestly, the other side should be just as insulted, but they're not, because this attitude only helps them in the long run.

In reality, this is more like the fishhook situation centrists have with antis vs. proshippers. Saying "this whole thing is stupid" really only benefits antis because they now have grounds to reply, "Yes, this IS stupid, don't you think proshippers are crazy for being upset at something so trivial?" while conveniently omitting the part where antis routinely send proshippers death threats and other heinous material.

Look at it from this angle: the most concrete harm I have seen their side say they've suffered is a deep discomfort and estrangement from the book. Which, yeah. That sucks. But it's also kinda on you to just click away if it makes you uncomfortable.

On the other hand, I have had legitimate crying fits because of horrible messages I received and have told people multiple times about the anon who mocked my recently-deceased mom. Which, unlike clicking away from a blog, I had no choice but to see sometimes because I was still naive enough to believe people would behave themselves in my inbox. In fact, a mutual were recently discussing our anxieties over retaliation should IDW be cancelled. There's stuff about this that you just don't want to think about because dwelling on it will freak you out.

"Both sides are bad" stings, especially in light of knowing the measures I have taken to walk on eggshells and draw proper boundaries. I literally cannot know if someone in this fandom will consider my explanations harassment and dogpiling, so I try not to reblog with commentary. On the reblogging site.

Reflect on how fucked-up that is, to feel uncomfortable adding a tag to someone's fanart because you're worried they might realize you're One of Them(tm) and shun you on that basis alone.

I won't sit here and say I've always been perfect in my conduct, but at the same time, it's just the infuriating experience of double standards all the way down. Somehow it never occurs to them that if I held them to the same standard they hold me, I could call them all out on intellectual dishonesty for refusing to engage with any of our points no matter how calmly or clearly stated because "lol ur just a hater," and tar them with the same brush as those who sent me death threats.

But ofc, things don't work out like that in the calculus of Le Sonic Discourse. It's just a rotten experience to the core.

#asks

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firefly-sky · 2 months

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stop using kyle as leeway to talk politics. i know ive talked about this before but shit on this site just gets worse and worse. stop using him as a gateway for your political beliefs on the israel/palestine conflict. it doesn’t prove your point. targeting a fictional jewish 9 year old isn’t gonna make the war end so you might as well stop hurting actual people with your bigotry and go to twitter or something if you want to debate politics.

your posts and fanart using kyle as a mask for your opinions isn’t going to get the israeli government to be like “oh y’know what we should do? we should stop because this person on fucking tumblr says so’ like it’s not helping anybody. it’s hurting actual jewish people from what i can tell. send me all the anon hate you want. i don’t care. i can take it. but i’m sick of seeing this shit.

another thing i have a problem with is the fact that this fandom so desperately claims not to want tratt to make an episode based around this conflict, but i know that if they were to make an episode and didn’t portray israelis in the worst light imaginable this fandom will go ballistic because ‘it’s offensive to the palestinians’.

i’ll say this once and i’ll say it again. i absolutely do not under any circumstances support what israel is doing. i think that what is going on there is absolutely disgusting and words cannot comprehend how vile this situation is. however, you also can’t just look at what you want to look at. there is a lot of history between the two, stuff i am not yet qualified to talk about because i don’t feel like i know enough about it to say what i want to say. you also cannot just overlook october 7th. you cannot ignore what the people in israel went through as well.

with that little disclaimer out of the way, back to the topic at hand. south park has made so many offensive jokes. jokes about the holocaust, about sexual abuse, about political issues outside of this. and yet nobody cared. but i can absolutely tell that yall will go absolutely ballistic if tratt were to make an episode that didn’t show the israelis in the worst light they can. so why only care now? why isn’t anyone angry about the past jokes they’ve made? why isn’t anyone upset about that, but the moment anyone in this fandom talks about israel/palestine it’s always ‘censor israel because israel is bad and leave palestine because palestine is good’. like if we’re going by that logic why does nobody censor russia when they’re talking about it? (from what i can tell) why does nobody censor one side when talking about american politics? why is it just this one single conflict that people are so up in arms about censoring one party and not the other?

i do agree that a south park israel/palestine episode would be in horrible, horrible taste. i’m not saying like ‘oh let tratt make that happen because it would be funny’ no. it wouldn’t be funny. that’s absolutely not the case. however, if you guys are going to rant about why tratt airing a south park episode is bad, why do you turn around and ignore the fact that this fandom is actively making fanart and fanfics so they can talk about their political stances while using kyle as a puppet for said viewings?

i guess what i’m asking si where is the line. because form what i can gather, this fandom thinks it’s okay for people to make the most disgusting fanfics and fanart of kyle, tokenizing him and marginalizing him, but the moment someone mentions tratt making an episode it’s suddenly too far? in what world does that make sense? because i know yall don’t do your research beforehand. you just hear what you want to hear and say what you want to say. but the minute someone counters you with actual evidence you freak out. why is that?

(and again. i’m saying this now so i don’t get anyone thinking i don’t support free palestine. what is happening in palestine is vile and disgusting. it’s awful that this is happening, and i have been doing what i can to help out in the means of fundraisers and raising money. i don’t support what israel is currently doing. but i also don’t support october 7th, and i don’t condone the people who claim that people outside of the israeli government have anything to do with what israel is choosing to do just because they’re from israel or they are jewish. i am very anti genocide on both sides, obviously. and i do support free palestine whole heartedly. this post is simply made for the fandom because i’m so sick of seeing people get driven out of the fandom because of the way the fandom treats people like them. this goes for any fandom. not just south park, even though this is basically me ranting about that specific fandom.)

#south park #skipper speaks #kyle broflovski #israel #palestine #politics #(feel free to block the politics tag if it bothers you/you don’t want to look at stuff like this)#i feel like i should put a tw but i don’t know what it would be for

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ooops-i-arted · 3 months

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Gina Carano Sues Disney and Lucasfilm. According to Just Some Guy at 1 : 36 of the youtube video. Gina Carano was the one who put gasoline into the fire herself by intentionally starting a fight with trans people and mocking them for their importance in society.

I was sick the day the happened and @jennadknowsbest-blog was kind enough to tell me and boy let me tell you, despite feeling like crap I was laughing like this allllllll day

If you too need a good laugh, read the released document thingy. It's badly written on so many levels. (I saw it on Reddit but I think it's floating around Tumblr too. There are some golden comments on both.) Both from just a writing style perspective (it's written like a teenager's Star Wars fanfic) and the fact that her main argument is that "Pedro Pascal said mean things about conservatives and wasn't punished" when 1. most of the posts were apparently before he was hired as the Mandalorian and 2. it seems like pretty common knowledge in fandom that he was asked to tone it down and he did. I follow him on Insta and he rarely posts outside of promoting his own work, and it's largely "support this cause" or "I love my trans sister" instead of attacking/joking at anyone. (I guess his Twitter had more comments, but he's since deleted it afaik.) Overall, it's likely just a stunt to get the right-wing frothing at the mouth and Gina's name back in people's mouth, because she hasn't filmed anything since Terror on the Prairie (one of two Daily Wire films she was supposed to have, the other appears to not be happening anymore) and My Son Hunter (which was straight Breitbart propaganda). Shatpiro has used and dumped her and while I doubt she's hurting for money, I bet she's desperate to get the praise and attention and adoration that the Cara Dune role briefly brought her. Why else would she come crawling back to a company she's publicly trashed and accused of mistreating for the last several years? It doesn't make sense by her own logic! If they were so bad, why does she want back? (And who's gonna hire her now if they think she's a liability who's going to turn around and sue them?)

It's really disgusting though that Gina wants to claim she was discriminated against for being a woman while actively mocking minority groups. Her post appeared on my Insta fyp and I usually don't click because I know she's gonna piss me off, and I clicked and she did. At the time she had a story that said "Still beeping, bopping, booping" with a smirky picture of her. So all she's been told - we know Pedro talked to her because she herself admitted it on Twitter*, and while I'm sure there were plenty of people jumping on the hate bandwagon, there were also people trying to genuinely explain - and explained how this is hurtful to the queer community, she still keeps doing it and thinks it's funny.

That's what's unforgivable to me. Not that she said ignorant shit in the first place - we all have - but her refusal to learn and do better. She wants to say whatever she wants without pushback and so do her fans. The few times I've thought it's worth it to try and talk to someone about it, they always insist it's just her opinion and say something homophobic to me as well (last time I talked to a Cara Dune content creator on Insta, she said she "doesn't agree" with me being gay and "I can't expect everyone to agree with me." For wanting to exist as a gay person. Apparently I should just take it when people mock me or say I should burn in hell.) That's the problem with Gina and her supporters. They don't care, they don't want to think critically or debate, they want to say anything they want without consequence and brush off any conflict with "well it's just a joke" or "it's just her opinion."

Bigotry is not an opinion. You can't "not agree" with someone's skin color and it's the same with their sexuality. You don't get a fucking opinion on whether I have the right to exist as a queer woman.

Let's not pretend the things Gina says are in a void. People who flock to her believe the same things she does. That's why people have protested her attending FanExpo (this video goes into more depth thank you @jennadknowsbest-blog for sharing), when you invite people who, like her, think it's funny to mock anyone like them, it doesn't make a safe or welcoming environment for people like me. Sure one can brush off a comment or two - but where do you draw the line? When does it become harassment? And who is going to protect people like me from that harassment? How can I count on security from an organization that invited Gina and encouraged these people in the first place?

And I say all this as a queer woman who is able to chameleon myself very well because I've done it since childhood. Things are only getting more dangerous for people who are visibly queer. A nonbinary teen was just killed in Oklahoma. I live in a relatively blue area of a blue state, but that doesn't mean I'm completely safe. There are extremists out there, and they're only getting more bold - because people like Gina think it's amusing to fan the flames. Gina, at least, has faced some consequences for it. I doubt this lawsuit will go anywhere (either it'll be settled and Elon and Gina have some Own The Libs content, or they'll be dismissed/lose and they'll get some A Woke Judge Discriminated Against Me content). Gina will be happily on her way. Meanwhile, I get to wonder if the people around me who dismissively say "it's just her opinion" are the kind of people who don't think much about social issues.... or are the kind of people who will happily vote my rights away in the next election.

I assure you, if you have friends who are queer, they are listening to what you say about this case. Throughout all her tomfoolery, I've found Gina to be an excellent canary in the coal mine when it comes to identifying homophobes.

*She apparently later told Tucker Carlson that no one bothered to explain the pronouns thing to her, so we know she's a liar who twists the story as well, which is why I never take anything she says in good faith.**

**I'm very embarrassed I know this but I can't help but following up on stupid things she's doing. She fascinates me. She's like the inverse of a blorbo to me, like she pisses me off but she compels me. How can one person be this dumb. (Fr tho has anyone in her life talked to her about CTE??? Impulsiveness/aggression are possible symptoms....)

#gina why can't you be normal i would still be a fan if you weren't an asshole #I have a lot of Feelings bc first finding out about Cara/Gina I really related to and admired her #and then........this #anti gina carano #asks #gina carano

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thankskenpenders · 2 years

Text

Comic-Con has come and gone! It’s been an exciting time for Sonic comic fans with news about the upcoming Scrapnik Island miniseries, a live mural painting from Adam Bryce Thomas, Gigi Dutreix, and co., and more. Also, Penders was there

For a while now Penders has been saying that SDCC 2022 would be where he released the new hardcover reissue of Mobius: 25 Years Later with an added extra chapter and a few names changed, now packaged as The Lara-Su Chronicles: Beginnings. (Before anyone asks: yes, he has the rights to rerelease his old Archie Sonic stories following the lawsuit, and yes, he says he’s going to pay the artists royalties. Kudos to him for that, at least.) While I take every creative endeavor the guy announces on Twitter with a massive grain of salt for obvious reasons, I thought this one might have some small hope of actually happening because it’s mostly just a collected volume of some comics that already exist and not a whole new graphic novel

So, did that happen?

Nope!

But he did show off a new build of the iOS-exclusive The Lara-Su Chronicles motion comic app, which is the main way he plans on releasing these things. He’s shared a few new videos on Twitter, too, so let’s take a look at those. This is what he’s been working on all these years

Let’s tackle these in chronological order. First up: the M25YL “remaster.” (I'm just linking directly to the original tweet because Tumblr won't let me upload more than one video.)

From that first page it's immediately obvious that the hand lettering is gone, replaced with a font. Between the few character names changed to maintain consistency with TLSC and the many translations he's doing, digital lettering is probably just easier on that front. I won't knock him too much for that, although the fact that he kept the same random words bolded is funny to me

No, what really knocks me on my ass here is when we get to the second page and we see that the new motion comic format and the need to show more of the backgrounds means that not even this "remaster" is safe from Ken's horrible fucking photo backgrounds. Here's a direct comparison of how he ruined this panel, originally drawn by Steven Butler and colored by Jason Jensen:

I should add in here that I don't hate the use of photo backgrounds on principal. You can do some really cool things with mixed media! As is true of basically everything in art, any technique can be cool if it's used with the right intent. I was a Homestuck reader in its heyday, and it made cool use of color-altered photo landscapes and images taken straight off the internet mixed with the cartoony characters and original elements. But this is not that. This isn't trying to be mixed media or alternative or counterculture or whatever, it's just a shoddy attempt to save time on a hamfisted tribute to Silver Age comics

It's also worth noting that Angel Island, which looks extremely tiny here, is in fact the same shitty image Penders has been using as his personal logo for years

Next up, an excerpt from The Storm, the prologue chapter starring Geoffrey that will be included with the rerelease of M25YL. He's been posting previews of this for years

This one also has voice acting! Bad voice acting!

When asked what happened to Geoffrey's signature accent, Penders said that he only had access to an American actor, and that he'd rather not have him use a fake accent. The audio is apparently also temporary, although how much will or won't be changed in the full release is impossible to predict. Either way, the wooden voice acting does Ken's typically clunky dialogue zero favors here, and it continues to baffle me that he thinks all of these motion comic bells and whistles are somehow worth all the added time and effort when it's been over a fucking decade and he still hasn't released the first of seven planned volumes

Also noteworthy here is that we actually see the point where the timeline-altering energy wave or whatever hits? I guess? I assume that's what's happening, because the art style deliberately changes from Ken's best approximation of what he thinks Archie Sonic looked like (which already isn't great, although the dog girl is almost kinda cute) to his new style for TLSC, which. God. Look at that profile view of Geoffrey

Lastly we have a preview of the opening of The Lara-Su Chronicles: Shattered Tomorrows, AKA the actual first volume of the series. It's the scene of Lara-Su walking on the beach and shedding a single tear over how Knuckles is dead, as one does

It's not as noticeable in the video, but I need to link to the full res version of the shot of Lara-Su sitting on the rocks so you can appreciate how truly fucking horrendous the jpeg artifacting is. At the risk of referencing Homestuck too many times in one post, this is truly some Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff level shit. I don't know how he did this

And, at the very end we have a special guest appearance from the one, the only... the unlicensed likeness of Anthony Mackie that he is still fucking using for this character. Despite his appearance changing slightly in other art, this page still very much just uses a redraw(?) of Mackie's IMDB profile photo

And that's it! If you've been following the updates on this project for years like I have, you may have noticed something

None of these pages are actually new!

I'm pretty sure we've seen every single one of these before. Some of them are from years ago. If there's actual new material in this preview build of the app beyond the addition of speech bubbles to some of these pages, it's not present in these videos. Penders says that his next priority after recharging from the con will be releasing TLSC Beginnings (the M25YL rerelease + that Geoffrey chapter), but it's hard for me to believe he's anywhere close to releasing anything in the state these previews are in, unless he's secretly sitting on a whole bunch of pages that he just didn't want people to read for free at his con table

As usual, though, Penders claims that the responses from Comic-Con attendees were positive, particularly in comparison to the constant dunking he's subjected to on Twitter. People were even buying his prints. (He also posted a photo of Karl Bollers visiting his table. I don't know what Bollers thought about the app.) My kneejerk reaction is that I find this kind of hard to believe, but it's also like... I dunno, people are just generally going to be polite at a con, nine times out of ten. Most people are not going to walk up to someone at an artist alley and be like "hey bro your prints look like dogshit." It isn't the place for that. They don't wanna cause a scene by getting into an argument in the middle of their expensive con trip. I also don't doubt that there are a lot of people out there who probably see the old Archie Sonic comics he always has for sale at cons and go "oh hey I've heard of that" or "oh I read some of those as a kid!" and then realize he was one of the writers and wish him luck on his new endeavors, blissfully unaware of decades of obscure Sonic drama. And while it's well documented that I don't like the guy or his work, I don't think that's a bad thing! People are allowed to be polite to him. I do not want him to get pelted with fucking tomatoes every time he goes outside

But the thing is, most of the feedback the guy's getting is either polite well-wishing within the context of a busy convention, or people spamming him with pictures of Donkey Kong and telling him to retire on Twitter. And so he's shutting out the latter, and taking the fact that people aren't beating his ass in the QRTs at the SDCC show floor as a sign that he's on the right track, and that Twitter is just full of haters looking for ammo

And like. He's not wrong on that last point! People blame him for all sorts of shit he didn't actually do and take many things wildly out of context and spam his replies for fun

But Jesus Christ, my guy. You've been working on these comics for a decade and the art looks like this

#tkp post

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sparxwrites · 1 year

Text

The Asshole-Of-The-Internet AU

sparx god. dsmp has internet and comms are iPhones and tommy gets banned from dsmp Twitter so he has to anonpost on dsmp 4chan

hoodie RKJGHRKGHKJGHERHGJHRHGH TOMMY ON 4CHAN OH NO

sparx …………oh no now I have “what if asshole-end-of-the-internet dsmp au” 4chan kiwifarms whatever else

hoodie they try to radicalize him but it doesnt work bc he literally is in exile

sparx SCREAMING okay but au where dream runs 4chan. Wilbur stars as null who fucks up 4chan and then makes kiwifarms when he gets run off the site. tommy is the normie they’re both desperately trying to recruit. Schlatt runs rise of kings or whatever tf the pick-up artist site is called

hoodie OH MY GOD YES

sparx this is perhaps the worst thing ever I have had in my head and I do not say that lightly

hoodie its SO fucking funny tho tommy in the reddit dms with wilbur who is trying so so hard to get him to join his site but tommy just keeps asking how many bitches wilbur gets from kiwifarms and wilbur has to say 'niki left me bc i made the site'

sparx SFAHDJFKGKGLSGSHDKGHRKRL niki left Wilbur and went to found ovarit which i think is like. the radfem site heghghgh

hoodieRJKHRJGHGH wilbur radicalised niki

sparx his dick was so shit it radicalised niki………….. George on 4chan but he just fuckinf sucks at being nasty and keeps messaging dream like “there r people being racist on here :/“

hoodie george on 4chan telling ppl to stop saying slurs

sparx YEAH YEAH u see my vision

hoodie george: idk this is kind of mean :/ dream, typing out smth incredibly evil: its just the internet it doesnt matter

sparx dream has to pretend occasionally he has morals for the sake of the bussy which he still has yet to get him and quackity are moots on some incel website

hoodie hes in it for the long game RJHGH quackity is on an incel website bc sapnap and karl left him

sparx he watches Schlatt’s webinars on negging

hoodie REJGHRJHHG quackity: takes notes so he can use it to win back sapnap quackity is literally the only gay person in a sea of pathetic straight men who are threats to society

sparx diversity win! this homosexual is a pathetic man who’s a threat to society <3 techno bc he is a chad only has a Snapchat that he uses to post gym thirst trap gains pics

hoodie RGJHJGRHGH sapnap is also a chad who only has snapchat he and techno have each other added so they can compare gains quackity hate screenshots all of their posts and jerks off to them in the private of his sad sad studio apartment

sparx HRGHRJGJGKD YES Karl makes Twitter threads so long u gotta use that unroll app for them and refuses to add image descriptions tho george keeps begging him

hoodie RHGERJHGHG why is george the most moral person in this au im crying hes just a normal guy trying to do the right thing

sparx Tubbo runs a parody account of a major political figure, except he’s actually very smart and has a lot of good ideas and the political figure is very stupid and so a) many people think tubbo’s account is actually the real one and news outlets regularly report his tweets as tho they’re fact, and b) he realises slowly that the guy he’s parodying is actually copying his ideas

hoodie ERJGHEGHERJGHKJERHGJGHERJHGJHGERJGHJGHRJGHRGH THATS....OH MY GOD wait what if the political figure is like Eret or smth

sparx Tommy: tubbo they banned me from 4chan :( Tubbo, typing under his “@scrotus” account: wait a second Tommy I’m trying to influence international trade policy with China

hoodie KJERGHEKJGHJRGHGHRJGRHJGH clingyduo in this au goes so fucking hard also dream violating the rules of his own site to ban tommy is SO funny tommy has to go back to reddit

sparx I do also love the exile implication that it’s possible to get banned from 4chan YEAH

hoodie dream just wants tommy's cringe ass off of 4chan tubbo should honestly be banned from twitter but at this point everyone is convinced hes really eret and eret's actual account gets banned for impersonating a public figure

sparx hrbrhfhfr YEAH eret does not attempt to get unbanned bc at this point he desperately needs tubbo to keep his ratings up

hoodie tubbo is really the only thing keeping the public opinion of him up tubbo is the last bastion of hope for his reelection tommy literally is barely aware of all of this hes too wrapped up in whatever tf is happening with wilbur and dream ranboo has a tumblr

sparx ranboo has a tumblr and has no idea tf is going on out there

hoodie eryn used to have a prank youtube but he went too far and got permabanned JHRGHRJHG ranboo is safe....

sparx he's busy reblogging fanart of the founders of 4chan and kiwifarms kissing

hoodie KJRFHEJKGHJGHRJGH dream considers doxxing ranboo for this crime bc ranboo is the one drawing that fanart

sparx YES YES YES

hoodie wilbur on the other hand turns the fanart into his mousepad and sends pictures of it to dream

sparx tommy: ranboo why are you drawing rpf of my brother ranboo: wait these are real people ranboo: ............................wait your brother founded kiwifarms?????

hoodie tommy: yeah ranboo: ......................tommy im sorry but this has to go in your callout post tommy: youre making a callout post about me? ranboo: i have one in my drafts just in case : ( sorry : ( i have one for all of my mutuals

sparx aLJSDKJFHERJGKHERKJGEFKJGHE OFC HE DOES

hoodie this is all said by a guy who has been drawing fanart of kiwifarms founder kissing 4chan founder....hypocrite

sparx the joke’s on ranboo, tubbo has files on all his friends with their addresses phone numbers known aliases known associates family members birthdays social security numbers and photos of the outside of their house

hoodie TJGHERHJGHJERHGHRGHJGEGHHGG tubbo is prepared to drop these if any of them ever cross him even wilbur wont fuck with tubbo and wilbur also has the full doxes on everyone...expect for dream this is part of why dream is wilbur's arch enemy sorry this is the best au of all time

sparx this is a absolutely the best au of all time wilbur is obsessed with getting dream's dox

hoodie wilbur: tommy im not going to help you do your homework, im trying to dox dream

sparx he's like. tommy. tommy i gotta get dream's dox. there's only ONE way to do this. tommy: stalk hi- wilbur: seduce him tommy: ...............aight i'm out

hoodie RKJHGJHH tommy: have fun you fucking freak wilbur: oh i will, i will : ) tommy:

sparx tubbo, absently, scrolling twitter: do you want me to make homosexual sex illegal? i could probably do that ranboo: my fanfic is coming true?! tommy: ..................................what the fuck is wrong with both of you

hoodie tommy: why is everyone i know a wrongun?????? ranboo: im not a wrongun...am i? tommy: you draw fucking art of my brother making out with dream ofc youre a wrongun!!!! tubbo: im going to outlaw rollerskates

sparx DSKJFSHHKGJ tubbo's just casually running a country

hoodie tubbo is basically the president at this point shockingly a positive thing when we compare it to dsmp canon that was not so positive for tubbo karl makes a thread about how tubbo isnt actually the real president but tubbo just responds saying 'yeah im a parody account' and literally no one believes him

sparx everyone's like, oh, our eret, so witty! so funny! look how down and hip with the kids he is

hoodie RGJGHRJGH

hoodie also im watching a schlatt video rn and honestly schlatt needs to be in this au more i think he should be the third person trying and failing to radicalise tommy

sparx OKAY BUT THIS AU IMPLIES SCHLATT MANAGES TO LIKE. TAKE KIWIFARMS FROM WILBUR front page news that's like "I'M THE EMPEROR NOW BITCH"

hoodie HE SHOULD ERKJGHJRHGHGHG he fucking stages a coup

sparx jannies lockout

hoodie RJKGRJGHGH wilbur is literally flipping things in the other room HIS GLORIOUS SITE....HIS KIWIFARMS.... his unfinished symphony

sparx UNFINISHED SYMPHONY OF KIWIFARMS

hoodie JRHGH schlatt perma bans wilbur and tommy's accounts and also doxxes wilbur then hes like 'if i find out any of the users here are female im banning them too' this is how wilbur and niki eventually end up teaming up bc he convinces her that schlatt is the true evil

sparx HOWLING HE WOULD

hoodie 'this is a manly site for men ONLY'

sparx niki: wilbur i will work with you if you publicly record a video saying ur dick is tiny and ur head game sucks wilbur: ........... :( ok

hoodie wilbur: anything to get my site back.............

sparx ranboo: so that new video from wilbur..... uhh. anyone else think it was kinda....... 😳 tommy: ranboo. my brother. i am going to kill you.

hoodie tommy: ranboo you have one last chance to apologize or i will end your life right here and now ranboo: sorry for being gay 😔 tommy: not sorry enough!!!!!!

sparx SORRY FOR BEING GAY im gonna shit

hoodie RJGHGGHGH ranboo is sorry for being gay for your brother, tommy

sparx hmmmm who have we forgotten in this au

hoodie hmmmmm tina fundy fundy is a scorned kiwifarms mod who thought he was wilbur's fav

sparx JSHDFKJDFHG fundy: i was your SON wilbur wilbur: fundy. you're 19. i am 21. fundy: your SON

hoodie fundy: you ABANDONED ME wilbur: i was literally kicked off of my own site

sparx fundy: i'm gonna kill myself now wilbur: lmao. -wait NO DON'T

hoodie TJKGHRGHRGJH wilbur: wait bro are you joking? wilbur three days later: i think he actually did it fundy, not dead: taught him a lesson lol

sparx skdjfjsdkjghdfkjghdfkj

hoodie this au is a blessing

sparx it's Something!!!!

#dsmp tag #asshole internet au #here you go you pack of fucking reprobates #enjoy!!!!!#i guess!!!!!

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