#the doc has literally less than a thousand words
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What Is NaNoWriMo?
You’ve likely seen some posts about NaNoWriMo before. It’s nearly impossible to exist in any creative writing ecosystem without seeing people post about it or use it as a tag. This is everything you need to know about NaNoWriMo before the big event arrives this year.
Heads up! NaNoWriMo starts next month. This guide could help you get ready to join in the coming weeks or prepare for next year if you need more time.
What Is NaNoWriMo?
NaNoWriMo is a long acronym for National Novel Writing Month. It’s an event that happens every year in November. People from all over the world open new documents or fresh sheets of paper to write their own 50,000-word novels in 30 days or less.
History of NaNoWriMo
There is a pretty long history behind NaNoWriMo that boils down to these points:
In 1999, Chris Baty–a writer in San Francisco—decided to attempt writing a novel in a month.
He also asked his creative writing friends to join in the attempt.
They started writing on July 1 and six of them reached the word count by July 31.
The next year, the challenge moved to November so everyone could take full advantage of July’s gorgeous weather for vacations and general non-indoor-writing things.
Everyone from 1999’s event invited more friends, so 29 out of 140 reached the word count in year two.
Newspapers covered the fun event, which made it nationally known.
People made a website for NaNoWriMo so more people could participate.
Thousands participated in the annual November event online by following posts on the website.
In 2006, NaNoWriMo became a nonprofit.
Since 2006, NaNoWriMo has grown to include events throughout the year, like the summer program Camp NaNoWriMo.
427,653 writers from around the world participated in 2021.
How NaNoWriMo Works
If you want to see what NaNoWriMo is all about, you’ll have to sign up on the main website. It’s free to sign up so you don’t need to worry about it affecting your budget.
Once you reach your new dashboard, you can set all kinds of goals tailored to your writing routine or hopes, like:
Weekly writing dates
Total words for your story
Word counts per day or week
When you’re ready to start writing, you can use whatever tools you prefer. Physical notebooks, Google Docs, Word docs, and writing software programs are all compatible. Think of your NaNoWriMo dashboard as a separate tool recording your progress while your writing happens on the side.
There are also tons of free resources available year-round on the main website. Check out the resource hub to explore new topics or get the pep talk you need to start your new manuscript.
You can use it to write your first novel or your 50th. It depends on where you are in your creative writing journey.
Benefits of Participating In NaNoWriMo
There are many benefits to participating in NaNoWriMo. Writers enjoy things like:
Finishing a novel
Improving your writing skills
Meeting other writers
Getting feedback on your writing
Having a sense of accomplishment
Tips for Participating In NaNoWriMo
I understand how overwhelming it might feel to think of writing a novel in a month. It’s out of the norm, but that’s the point of NaNoWriMo! You’re supposed to set a writing goal that feels slightly outside of your normal routine. It’s easier to try new resources and writing tricks when you’re in uncharted territory.
Here are a few tips for participating in NaNoWriMo with a little less anxiety than you might feel right now.
Set Realistic Goals
Writing a novel in a month might be literally not possible for you. If your schedule, ideas, or anything else could get in the way of your goal, then it’s likely not realistic.
Set realistic NaNoWriMo goals this year to accomplish your dreams.
You could start by making a SMART goal, which stands for a goal that’s:
Specific (“I will write 500 words this month” instead of “I’ll write this month.”)
Measurable (“To write 500 words this month, I’ll write at least 16 words each day” instead of “I’ll try to write every day.”)
Achievable (“I know I’ll have time for this in my early morning or late evening hours” instead of “I’ll try to find time for my writing.”)
Relevant (“I’ll get to write about a character, theme, or story idea that matters to me” instead of “I’ll write something good.”)
Time-Bound (“I’ll finish writing every day by 10 p.m. at the latest and finish on November 30” instead of “I’ll write for the whole month.”)
Getting specific in these ways makes your writing goals actionable—not just hopeful.
Find a Writing Friend
Search the NaNoWriMo resource page to find writing groups you could join in November. It’ll help to read the forum posts from other participants working through the same challenges you’re facing.
Social media could also be a great place to find NaNoWriMo participants. Look into writing groups specifically for this November’s event. See if there are Discord servers for NaNoWriMo writers or TikToks writers are making about their experiences.
Select a Few Writing Tools
There are free writing resources all over the internet that will help you succeed in your NaNoWriMo goals this year. I’ve got an older list of resources people find helpful, but you can also check out NaNoWriMo’s official resource page.
Take Care of Yourself
You are always more important than your stories. You’re worth the effort it takes to do self-care habits like taking breaks, making quick healthy meals, and getting enough sleep.
Don’t forget to prioritize your physical, mental, and emotional needs this November. Taking breaks during your writing sessions could prevent burnout. Check-in with yourself daily to ask what would help you feel your best and what forms of self-care will boost your writing abilities.
Rewards are another great self-care tool too! What would make you happy? That might look like getting yourself an ice cream cone when you’re done with your first day or going to a movie for getting halfway through your goals. You should finish the self-care activity feeling rested and restored.
Consider Trying NaNoWriMo This Year
Anyone can try NaNoWriMo, no matter how much writing experience you have. Even if your goal is only to write a short story, use this event to practice writing. You’ll have a great time if you set achievable goals, prioritize your self-care, and surround yourself with a supportive creative community.
NaNoWriMo FAQs
Do I Have to Be a Novelist to Participate in NaNoWriMo?
No! The event was created to help the founder finish his first novel. You can join the NaNoWriMo event if you have a novel idea in the back of your mind or even if you just want to write a short story.
On the other hand, novelists are welcomed to join too. You could use the event to tackle your next manuscript or finish the novel you’re working on right now. There are no hard rules about what you can write.
How Much Do I Need to Write for NaNoWriMo?
How much you write for NaNoWriMo is up to you. The average novel is around 50-75,000 words, but that number isn’t realistic for everyone to write in 30 days or less. Set a word count that’s realistic for you given your writing abilities and time.
How Do I Complete NaNoWriMo?
You’ll complete NaNoWriMo by accomplishing the goal or goals you set for yourself on November 1! You’ll be your biggest cheerleader in this event, so make sure you celebrate your accomplishments.
What Happens if I Don’t Finish NaNoWriMo?
If you don’t finish NaNoWriMo, nothing happens. Seriously. It’s an international writing event, but there aren’t penalties for not meeting your writing goals or even falling out halfway through.
Writers set their own goals and keep themselves on track. If you don’t finish, recognize what happened and learn from it. You can always try again next year—or even next month if you want to do it again by yourself!
What Are the Official Rules of NaNoWriMo?
The official rules of NaNoWriMo are easy to follow. They include the following guidelines:
Set an official 50,000 word count goal if you want to participate via the NaNoWriMo free member dashboard.
Set a customized goal through the same dashboard, although it won’t be an official goal.
Follow the Code of Conduct whenever you’re posting in group spaces.
There are general understandings as well, like:
Don’t start working on your manuscript before November 1, including plot outlining and character work.
Don’t continue working on your manuscript after November 30. 11:59 PM on November 30 is the last chance to add to your official word count goal. After that, any writing or editing that happens will be unattached to your NaNoWriMo participation.
Does NaNoWriMo Cost Money?
NaNoWriMo doesn’t cost money! It’s completely free to participate in. However, there are additional things you can spend money on if you’d like to upgrade your experience.
You can invest in writing software or online tools as you see fit. You can also buy merchandise from the organization’s shop, which includes notebooks and a book on writing tips.
If you like what you see, please consider using the tip feature on my posts! I run this site for free, but will always appreciate the financial support. 💙
#nanowrimo#nanowrimo 2023#nanowrimo resources#nanowrimo tips#writer's block#writeblr#writing tips#writers of tumblr#writing#creative writing#writing inspiration#writing community#writing help#writing advice#writing resources#writer things#writers life#writers block#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#resources#free resources#creative writing resources
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"If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more" is so docxzoro coded that I feel like I going to explode!!!! I love them so much
And you are so incredibly talented that you leave me speechless, breathless. Your words and descriptions, every feeling that you manage to put into words in such a magnificent way. I feel so lucky that you give me the privilege of being able to read your art, which you put so much time and care into. I can't even describe how grateful I am for you to share this story with us.
Thank you!
That is literally such a great description for them, especially when it comes to Zoro. In OPLA, the way they made him, besides Kuina, Zoro has been alone for a long time himself. He trained and immediately went on to become the Demon Pirate Hunter. He lacks social graces (doesn’t care about them really) makes awkward jokes, and speaks less than most.
He’d rather fight a thousand men than ever have to talk about his feelings. But for people that are worth it, someone like Doc, he is willing to try and tell her if it means that she’ll stay.
Thank YOU for being a reason that I have continued working on this story. Thank you for taking the time to read my little fanfic and coming to share this with me. I am beyond grateful. 🖤
#anon#answered#Chaos in Their Bones review#I am so overwhelmed with the amount of love you all have given me today#it is incredibly humbling and an honor
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Would you mind posting an update on what snippets are in the works rn?<33 Like which are indefinitely on hold, which prompts (or like how many) you’re working on etc? Can’t wait for the next one!
Ohh hmm, let’s see!
I have a bunch of unfinished things floating about, I tend to start new ones whenever I’m stuck writing something or just get a brief idea in my head. Usually, whenever I get a prompt, I write down whatever comes to mind for that. These unfinished docs I have are anything between like a single sentence to a few thousand words.
These are all WIPs and I keep adding stuff whenever the inspiration strikes, and basically everything I write has been inspired by a bunch of different prompts!
In no particular order:
The Sad!Kitty story.
A very AU version where Isac's meeting Lit for the first time, out on a night out. He’s just on a demon rampage bc he wants to have sex for the first time lmao this prompt was so creative and funny, love it<3
Nathan trying to celebrate an achievement only to feel dismayed bc his mum is… his mum (she’s happy for him but Nathan still ends up feeling like it isn’t a big deal after all. Too many feels to explain here lol). He protest-buys himself a chocolate cupcake and sticks a candle in it. It’s more of a feel-good one than it sounds here.
Pretty early on into their relationship, Kit comes home from work to find Nat in pre-heat and starting to nest. I have posted a text conversation from the beginning of this snippet.
Alpha!Nat AU: “Ok if you’re doing AUs, how about some twists: Nat growing up in a pack w the boys, as an alpha, with no og hurt background? What would he be like? What would the pack and the dynamic be like? Maybe his first rut w them? (—)”
Literally just a couple of lines of Nat being all blushy and thinking how Kit is so handsome, and then saying it out loud when called out for staring.
Lizzy snippet, just them hanging out when they were still just getting to know each other. I have posted bits of this at some point too.
Nat being a good boi and doing more kneeling, but also finally getting to satisfy his curiosity for using his mouth.
Lithan, basically the As just getting handsy with a sleepy Nat. I should start a sleepy boys being filthy soft on the couch -series at this rate hahhaah
Litzy meeting Sammy for the first time
Izzy having a panic attack over uncertainty with his birth control :( This one is just a few lines and I don’t like writing it bc I hate feeling Isac like that. The prompt asked for Isac having something rough happen & how he'd react, and I figured it’d be a good way to explore his issues with this topic. It was not a good idea I hate it why did I think I should scare him with one of his biggest fears horrible let my bunny be happy!!!
Link visiting Nathan’s family
Link visiting Liam and Kit’s home town/families. <-This doc basically only has this one line.
Izzy coaxing Nat into wearing some pretty underwear because he knows the As would pass out. Nat’s not personally that into wearing anything like that but he’s not against it and finds out that he’s very much into the reaction he gets lmao
More stuff with Nat’s friends
Some less specific angsty Nat snippets/notes
A filthy prompt-fill for the filthyspicy anon who wanted some spicy free use Nat. Anon you are filthy and I love you hahaha<3
Liam getting teamed up on by everyone else until he’s all whiny and babie and loved to death. Or well, it’s mainly Kizzy bullying him while Nat is being v helpful and a good boy, and doing what he’s told to keep wriggly Liam in place. Heavily based on a prompt as well.
Izzy’s heat/preheat/nesting/instinct stuff, nothing specific in this yet, I just want to write more about it at some point
Haven’t started this but I do want to write more about the Lizzy dynamic where Isac/his O is the more dominant all the way through
Ohh and I have a couple of lines of some more Lucy and Nat just hanging out but I don’t know what to write for it so it’s just… there.
I have some more but these were the ones I could easily see just by opening my docs.
SO uh yeah. I keep trying hahahah I’m just having a hard time completing things :’) These are all technically actively in the works, so nothing is on hold, but my 'actively' has been a bit ehhh xx
#This was fun!#Thank you for the ask!<3#Think it made me feel a bit better to see how much I've actually worked on these#Bc sometimes I feel like I've only DONE something if it's completed and posted yk?#But that's not really true#now is it brain???#heh#Anyway#Hope you've had a lovely Tuesday<3
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scream
termites are, in fact, the fucking worst.
They make me feel so useless.
We have- had, now- this Telugu-English dictionary. Always called it the 'Brown dictionary' at home, because it was by Charles Philip Brown and it had to distinguished from the host of other dictionaries dotting the shelves (my grandfather has an extensive collection of books and that includes multiple Telugu-English dictionaries, as well as English-Telugu, Sanskrit-Telugu, Hindi-English, English-Hindi, and probably a bunch of others my kid-self couldn't be bothered about. Well now I very much can be bothered and I'll go check on them in a bit, but first, back to me moping about a dictionary. Also yes, my grandfather really likes collecting stuff. It's a goldmine that I'm only now beginning to appreciate as my interest in archives, conservation, and history grows. Also if you're new here (and my url doesn't make sense to you), hi, I'm Very Telugu on main sometimes and ramble about languages occassionally. Right, back to moping).
I'm stupidly fond of that dictionary. I rarely use it of course - probably why this even happened, it never seeing any sunlight - because I google shit like any other person. But just, growing up and having a rare moment of seeing my dad stumped by a word and us pulling out the Brown dictionary to look it up made me oddly excited? It's a nice memory (-I say, ignoring all the times when I'd have been groaning as he sent me to hunt it down because I'm certain those times happened too). Mostly though, the dictionary amuses me for a different reason. That book is wayyyy older than me, and I've been aware of it right since a time when I read books, but was young enough that I didn't really understand the need for author names. I mean, if I like a book and need to identify it, I need the title of the book itself. What do you mean it's possible to like an author and seek out more of their stuff? What good does knowing the author do? What do you MEAN dictionaries have authors??? The Oxford dictionary is just the Oxford dictionary??? And yeah, dad calls this one the brown dictionary, but that's because the cover of the book is brown, see? [Note: it was not, in fact, brown. The cover was orange and white. It was the other Telugu-English dictionary that was brown in colour, but I couldn't care less about that one at the time.]
[I eventually learned why it was called the Brown dictionary when my dad once asked for it and I grabbed the brown coloured dictionary and my dad was all ???]
So y'know, the title of that dictionary always makes me laugh when I remember why it's called that, and yeah I'm kinda emotionally attached to it now. Except today I decided it's time I look up my url on there because sure, I know what it means, but it's the brown dictionary. For old times' sake and all.
[side note: if you're wondering, my url means "she who never beholds the sun" (as my ideal state is me being holed up in my room). It's a Sanskrit word too, but Sanskrit dictionaries tend to carry only the figurative meaning of "part of a king's harem", so I'm particular about clarifying that I mean the more literal Telugu meaning when I use it. Bonus fact! I was delighted to learn of this word for the first time when my brother's ENT called him an asuryampasya. xD Great doc, that one.]
And well. That's when we discovered that the termites had attacked. They got some of the other stuff too, including somthing my mum is inordinately fond of and aaaaaaaah. I tried looking up online to see if we could buy another copy of the dictionary at least, but a used copy is priced at some forty fucking thousand (INR, that is. But still too expensive to buy just for old times' sake when technically I can just google the words I want.)
So that's it, then. The book is not so badly damaged that it's entirely useless so I can't even throw it out without feeling guilty, but large swathes of it are too messed up to use (the entry of asuryampasya is half eaten, with what's remaining reading 'she beholds the sun'). And I just. Feel so helpless. I read up on conservation practices and study the theory of how light ruins books and what chemical treatments are done and stuff but what is the point of me hoarding all that theoretical knowledge when the ONE book from my grandfather's collection I'm actually fond of got chewed up right in front of me, and I did nothing. Just. Scream. I feel very sad and useless. I should go check on the other books and stuff but I'm too upset to do it right now.
I'll get to it eventually, but until then it's moping (and making that the internet's problem like this) I guess. :(
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2 and 9 for the writing asks.
Thank you so much for the ask! <3
2. Anything that you'd like to write but feel like you're unable to?
Literally any other character other than Steve Rogers or Tony Stark lmfao.
I definitely feel like I'm on much more uncertain ground when it comes to writing anyone else (I've included Morgan in a couple of fics so far, and while I'm very happy with those works overall I would barely count those instances as substantial characterization for her). I'm working on a scene right now that's all about Tony and Natasha and the early stages of their friendship, and I would estimate that no less than 94% of the writing process for that has been me staring at the blinking cursor in my google doc agonizing over whether I'm doing her character justice lol.
I'd also like to try my hand at longer stories. I'm so in awe of all of you fic writers who deliver stories that are thousands or tens of thousands of words long. <3 I've got a few ideas rattling around in my brain that I'd like to pin down (anyone here interested in Natasha Stark/Tony Stark interdimensional there's-only-one-bed with a side of angst??), but they would definitely be much longer than anything I've written so far.
With both of these, I think even though it's challenging I still want to push myself because I feel that, if I want to keep writing, I'll just be limiting myself creatively in the long run if I don't.
9. Thoughts on cliffhangers.
Very fun for the 0.2 seconds that it takes me to click 'Next Chapter.'
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frat cake frat cake frat cake is now on repeat in my brain, pls elaborate
dude it's on repeat in my brain too i'm pretty sure i have a #frat cake tag it just haunts me
okay i feel like i'm free to talk about this mainly because uhhmmmm i don't. foresee myself working on it in the near future. so i'll tell you what i have written at the top of this doc, which is the basic concept i had for it i guess:
calum and luke hook up during formal rush when they’re both checking out one frat house and calum is sure luke is going to join that frat. but then they get bids from different frats and both accept and suddenly they’re enemies.
also, i'm pretty sure this AU involves frat rilex as well. alex is the president of frat A that calum joins and rian figures in somewhere. potentially the president of frat B? OH I FOUND IT it was a conversation in the atl channel of the club back in march basically the idea that maybe people in frats have bigs & littles (yknow like. pairing an older member with a new member. or brother? whatever they're called) and so alex is calum's big and rian is luke's big and then we end up with this plot
and to be completely transparent, the odds i write this fic become astronomically higher when i figure rilex into the equation, so. let's not give up hope yet
#this is also like. my compromise for an enemies to lovers fic#because i want to see if i can write one but this is as much as i can do#i just can't justify any other kind#apart from a romeo and juliet situation#but i think it would be funny if they did end up in enemy frats#anyway. so that's frat cake#i am accepting (a) notes or (b) people with frat experience who can help#i did so much research one night and then didnt even fuckin write anything#the doc has literally less than a thousand words#this is making me wanna work on it kind of#but last time i found a long-untouched doc with less than a thousand words it turned into so damn familiar#LMAO#ask#anonymous#fic talk#frat cake
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Excuse Me what is pulp and why is it importan?
Good question! And probably one I should have answered sooner. Time to put on the historian hat for this one.
"Pulp" is a term used mainly to describe forms of storytelling that sprang out or were dominant in 20th century cheap all-fiction American magazines from the 1900s to the 1950s. The pulp magazine began in 1896, when Frank Munsey's Argosy magazine, in order to cut costs, dropped the non-fiction articles and photographs and switched from glossy paper to the much less expensive wood pulp paper, hence the name. The pulp magazines would mainly take off as a distinct market and format in 1904, when Street & Smith learned that Popular Magazine, despite being marketed towards boys, was being consumed by men of all ages, so they increased page count and started putting popular authors on the issues.
It was specifically the 1905 reprint of H.Rider Haggard's Ayesha that not only put Street & Smith on the map as rivals to Argosy, but also inspired other companies to start publishing in the pulp format. Pulps encompassed literally everything that the authors felt like publishing. Westerns, romance, horror, sci-fi, railroad stories, war stories, war aviation stories. Zeppelins had a short-lived subgenre. Celebrities got their own magazines, it was really any genre or format they could pull off, anything they could get away with.
Nowadays, although they came quite late in it's history, the American pulps are most famous for it's "hero pulps", characters like The Shadow and Doc Savage that are viewed as a formative influence on comic book superheroes. The pulp magazines in America lasted until the 1950s, when cumulative factors such as paper shortages, diminishing audience returns and the closing of it's biggest publishers led to it dying off, although in the decades since there's always been publishers calling their magazines pulp. That's the American pulp history.
But pulps are a phenomenon that spans the entire world and has a much bigger history to it, because pulps have become synonymous with cheap fiction magazines and those have a much bigger history. In America, before the pulps, you had the dime novels, the direct predecessors of the pulps, as well as the novelettes. England had it's penny dreadfuls and story papers, and continued publishing pulp-format magazines past the American 1950s, and that's how we got Elric of Melniboné. France and Russia arguably got to it first with it's 1800s coulporters, chapbooks and particularly the feuilletons which lasted all the way to the 20th century and created characters such as Arsene Lupin, Fantomas and The Phantom of the Opera. The Germans published pulp under the name hefteromane. Japan also published pulp magazines both original as well as imported, and the current "light-novel" phenomenon started off as an equivalent of pulp magazines (it's even on the Wikipedia page). China has wuxia, Brazil has cordel, Italy has gialli. There were Indian, Persian, Ethiopian, Canadian, Australian pulps and much more. Look anywhere in the world and you'll find examples of "pulp" happening again and again, under different circumstances and time periods.
Even if we stick to American fiction, it's impossible to state that all pulp heroes must come from the 1900s-1950s pulp magazines, because that forces us to exclude some of the most popular pulp heroes like Indiana Jones, Green Hornet, Rocketeer and The Phantom. Pulp may have once been a term meant to refer to pulp magazines exclusively, but it's morphed and lost structure and it's become the closest thing we have to a general umbrella term that allows us to try and consolidate these under a shared history. It's a lot, as you can see, and it's why several pulp historians that broaden their scope outside of 1930s American fiction have adopted Roland Barthes's definition of pulp as "A Metaphor With No Brakes In It", which is still the closest thing to a true working definition we have.
Why is it important? You tell me. I don't like to stake claims about stuff being "important", everyone's got their own priorities in life. Surely a lot of people would scoff at the idea of old populist fiction published in what was functionally equivalent to toilet paper having any sort of "importance". On the other hand, some people definitely want to talk big about the pulps as a cultural bedrock of fiction, something that's baked into the lifeblood of all fiction as we currently know it. Which it is, mind you, but I don't like to talk about pulp fiction's value being derived mainly from merely the things it inspired.
There is definitely a historical importance to be had in cataloguing them. According to the US's foremost pulp researcher Jess Nevins, 38% of all American pulps no longer exist, and 14% of all American pulps survive in less than five copies. Many libraries have very scant, if any, records on them, many collectors are hard to locate and are uncooperative when it comes to sharing information and letting outsiders view their collections. A lot of them are bound up in legal complications that prevents them from taking off in the public domain, and a lot of them ARE public domain but are completely inacessible as research material. And that's the American pulps, foreign pulps have fared far worse in posterity, with records inaccessible to people unfamiliar with the language or locations, many existing merely in mentions on decades-old records, and hundreds if not thousands of them being completely gone beyond recovery or recall.
Gone, dead, wasted, destroyed. They can't be found in barbershops or warehouse or bookstores, not even in antique stores. Hundreds, thousands of characters, stories and creators, gone. Time and posterity have crushed them to dust, forgotten and ignored by their successors. Unfettered by pretenses of respectability that repressed their glossier counterparts, in packages meant to be destroyed after reading, proudly announcing itself as trash. Things that should have never even lasted as long as they did have died many times now. It's heroes peripherical shapeshifters, nearly all of whom seem dead, quite dead, as dead as fictional characters can possibly be.
But they do not die forever. Many of them have, maybe most of them have, but many of them linger on.
"The strange red flickering of 1930’s fiction seems distant now. You hold in your hand the product of a time too remote to recall, and feel a slow stir of wonder. The smell of pulp pages, an illustration, an advertisement, these fragile things mark the slow hammering of time and display what it has done. About you are today’s machines, today’s shadows.
Outside the window, leaves hang against the sky, as did leaves during the 1930’s. The sound of voices are no different then than now. You hold the magazine and feel something quite delicate slipping past. These solid forms surrounding you are all insubstantial. Time’s hammer will also pass across them, leaving little enough behind." - Spider, by Robert Sampson
Many of the things people call dead are just things that have been sleeping for a while or haven't had the chance to be born. Pulp fiction is dead on the page, inert, unless your imagination breathes live to it, and every now and then, one way or another, these characters dig themselves out of dustbins. Maybe it's a brief revival, maybe it's a successful reboot. Maybe they find publishers, or maybe the public domain allows them to find new life. Maybe new creators do interesting things with them, and maybe, just maybe, they live again because some won't shut up about them online. Some curious impulse led you to me, did it not?
We all have our Frankensteins to obsess over, and these are some of mine. As someone who's lived a life perpetually restless over pursuit of knowledge, pulp has lured me like a moth to flame, because I literally never run out of things to discover within it, I never run out of possibilities. As the years pass and the public domain starts being more and more open to the public, more and more narrative real state is brought forth for writers and artists and creators to play around.
Pulp is the dark matter of fiction, the uncatalogued depths of the ocean, the darkest recesses of space. It's the box of your grandfather's belongings, the treasure you find in an attic, a body part sticking out from an old playground. It's the things that don't work, don't succeed, the things that don't fit, that are out of place. That shouldn't live and succeed, and did so anyway. The things that slither in the cracks, the shadows behind the curtain.
Aren't you interested in peering on what's behind the curtain?
The exquisite workmanship of the head, of a pre-pyramidal age, and the hieroglyphics, symbols of a language that was forgotten when Rome was young–these, Kane sensed, were additions as modern to the antiquity of the staff itself as would be English words carved on the stone monoliths of Stonehenge.
As for the cat-head–looking at it sometimes Kane had a peculiar feeling of alteration; a faint sensing that once the pommel of the staff was carved with a different design. The dust-ancient Egyptian who had carved the head of Bast had merely altered the original figure, and what that figure had been, Kane had never tried to guess.
A close scrutiny of the staff always aroused a disquieting and almost dizzy suggestion of abysses of eons, unprovocative to further speculation. - The Footfalls Within, by Robert E Howard, quoted by Stuart Hopen’s The Mythic American Culture
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how did you get into writing fic? i'd love to start but idk even where to begin! I loved adats so I was wondering do you have any advice?
Oh my goodness! I am so flattered you’ve asked me this. Yes, I can absolutely help. I’ll throw a bunch of rambling under the cut.
I started writing fic probably when I was... sixteen years old? A lot of my early works were oneshots. I couldn’t figure out how to do anything plot heavy for the life of me, so I just stuck to AUs or whatever I felt like. I wasn’t in any particular fandom -- I really wrote whatever I had ideas for. I remember I tried once to do a plot-heavy story and I received a review absolutely ripping it to shreds. Like, it was so cruel I cried lol. I ended up deleting the fic. Years later, I get what they were trying to say (basically, more substance, less style), but at the time it cut to the quick. Really, it was only when I was in my twenties that I started writing work that was longer and/or better.
The fandom that helped me actually write plot heavy work was a historical-based fandom. As I’m a historian, it was perfect. I got to use my research skills and knowledge to create works that, above all, aimed to feel authentic. I mainly read historical fiction, so I was familiar with how that genre worked. Miraculously, people loved my work. I think I wrote about ~200k in the period of a year? These were several short stories (20-40k) and a few oneshot filler fics. While I was part of this fandom I also helped organise a Big Bang which was a lot of hard work but was extremely rewarding. Along with that, I interacted mainly with other fic writers, so I spent a lot of time chatting to people about ideas and encouraging other writers, and it just created a lovely medley where no concept was impossible or any line of dialogue too difficult. We supported each other and it was truly like a little commune. I gradually stepped away from the fandom mainly because it was just a part of my life at a very specific time, and almost as soon as that time was over, my love for that story/ship faded, but I firmly believe I figured out a lot of how/what I do now purely through that experience.
Regarding ADATS
With ADATS, it stemmed entirely from wanting to “explain” three months in canon (at the end of season three). I was interested in the idea of season four setting up Will/Mike in canon, and I wanted to test the source material to see if I could draw from what already existed to create something authentic. I began with that simple idea: what happened from July to October in 1985? Then I thought about the major themes I wanted to hit -- family, friendship, coming of age, sexuality -- and I nested them around the bigger concept: how do I get Mike from being ostensibly straight to realising he is gay? That meant thinking of two steps: Mike discovering his attraction to guys; Mike discovering his attraction to Will. Those two concepts were separate “arcs” that needed addressing in different ways. Balance was key to weaving them together and making the reader feel like they knew what was coming (and that they felt smart for putting the pieces together) without just rushing through and going “now kiss!” That’s partly why ADATS needs a sequel, lol: because it’s not finished!
Writing process
The first thing I do when I start to get an idea is I write it down. Sounds obvious. But when you have a killer line of dialogue come to you in the shower and you think “I’ll remember that” -- reader, you will not remember it. You gotta get it down ASAP! I do that the whole way through, as generally I’ll be thinking of scenes I’m stuck on and then it’ll just come to me and I’ll quickly jot it down.
The next thing -- or what I do in the meantime -- is start structuring. I plan. I try to plan a lot. Sometimes it’s okay to write “and something happens here to get them here”, because you’ll figure it out later, but for the most part I’ve discovered that planning is like gold and you can’t get enough of it. I break my work up into generally 3-4 parts/sections, and I treat each section like a mini story. So each part needs a conflict and resolution, and it needs to flow into the next section. You need to have a feeling of things evolving and maturing. Once I’ve planned those little bits, I start thinking about the bigger plot arc and how I can drop in hints along the way. I’m probably not a subtle or skilled enough writer to yet pull off that sort of gasping twist you get in really excellent books, but I’m trying to get there. It’s hard, is what I’m trying to say, but that’s okay, because we’re all learning.
Then I generally do aesthetic stuff. Sounds stupid, probably. But nothing helps me get more into a mood than doing a Pinterest board or -- most of all -- making a Spotify mix. I start thinking about the vibe and the general atmosphere, and then I almost exclusively listen to that mix when I’m working. Sort of like muscle memory? Just to get the creative juices associated with that particular selection of songs.
Another thing I’ll do along with plot structure is character structure. This is a biggie. I mean, a story is nothing without characters. So I’ll just jot down a bunch of bullet points of characters and particular aspects that I want to highlight or remember. I hate continuity errors in fiction. Like, if someone says they work on Maple Street but later in the fic they’re working on Pine Street. I hate that. So I keep note of specific things that my main character might notice at repeated points in the story (colours, places, smells, names, sounds -- so they’re all consistent even as the narrative evolves). That’s another thing -- your characters’ motivations. Not everyone is going to be a huge player, but they all do serve a purpose. The most important character is obviously your main character. I personally think it’s important to let your M.C. be an arse at times. They’re going to be mean, they’re going to misinterpret things or fly off the handle... just let ‘em. Let them be wretched humans, and then bring them back and make them realise what they’ve done. Let them learn! I love consequences in fiction, lol.
At the same time, I’ll probably start writing. We’ve already written down some snippets of neat dialogue or descriptions, but now we should start the actual process. For me, I used to start at the beginning. Usually this was the most fleshed out anyway: I’ll have a clear idea of the beginning and the end, but nothing in the middle. These days, if I have a scene in mind that I can’t forget, I’ll just write it. It will possibly get scrapped or rewritten, but that’s okay, because at least you’ve got it down and now you can devote your brain power to something useful (like figuring out what the middle is supposed to be). I’ll have half a dozen of totally out of context scenes just littered in my Word document that I’ll add to as I go along. Eventually, though, you’re going to start writing properly, and that’s when you write your opening scene.
Opening scenes: super important. Every time I write a scene I think: what is the point of this? What do I want the reader to learn or takeaway? Sometimes you do have filler scenes, but they also serve a different purpose (perhaps to establish a group dynamic or to explore/describe a character’s surroundings). Mainly, though, every scene should push something forward in some way, whether it’s character development or a plot point. So, with an opening scene, I always think you have to establish: where you are; who you are; what they are doing; where they’ve come from (in a philosophical and practical sense); and where they’re going (ditto). That doesn’t have to happen in the first paragraph -- that would be silly. But if you sprinkle that information in over time it’ll gradually build up a picture of your character and that way the reader can get an idea of who they are. You basically need to give a snapshot of what your story is about. This also goes back to the character creator stuff: where they are at the start should be different to where they end up. How that happens is, of course, because of plot, and because you’ve structured everything to the nth degree, we’ve got a very clear progression of that character’s growth (/s easier said than done lol).
General advice
Write down everything: every idea, a bit of dialogue, a description, whatever. Write it down. Doesn’t have to be neat. Just has to be on paper. You can’t remember everything, so if you’re spending time trying to hold those things in your head, it’s taking up space for new ideas to come along.
Structure, plan, structure, plan. Sometimes it’s boring and I hate it. Other times, when I’ve not written in a few days and I open the Word doc and think wtf is this supposed to be, I am very grateful for Past Me for leaving such detailed notes. Seriously, it helps so much. Oneshots don’t really need planning, in my experience. You just get those out there. But multi-chaptered stories really do, even ones that “just” focus on a relationship.
Whatever you want to write, commit to it. Space goblins invade Hawkins? Do it. Eleven and Max find themselves in a cult akin to Midsommar (2019) and must escape? Yes. Just... whatever you want to do, remember that you’re writing it for you. Write what most interests you, what makes you when you reread it go AHHHHH I LOVE THIS!! Because that makes it a thousand times easier to actually get on with the writing when you enjoy what you’re doing.
Write a lot. Every day, if you can, or at least at designated times. Occasionally I have a very specific headspace/vibe I have to be in, but sometimes it just hits me and I’ll say to my partner “I need to write now” and just disappear, lol. The more you write the more you write. It’s so, so, so true. Cannot emphasise this enough. When I wrote that ~200k in twelve months? It was because I literally wrote every. day. Or near enough. Remember that some days you’ll write 200 words, and other days you’ll write 20k (this happened to me with ADATS -- part of the reason I finished it so quickly was because I had sprints of writing 10k+ at a time that only happened because I was in the rhythm of it). Write, write, write. Who cares if it’s crap! No one will see it until you are ready. In the meantime, just write!
Probably last of all (although I could go on and on) is connect with other writers. If you’re struggling to start, sometimes just talking about it can help a huge amount. I hope it goes without saying that you can message me whenever you want, anon or not, and I will talk to you. We can talk about ideas or I can beta stuff, whatever you want! Find like-minded people and talk to them about what you want to do. Another thing this helps is in advertising your work when you do publish. I see a lot of first time fic writers get super down because they publish their magnum opus on AO3 but no one comments. Honestly, it’s because no one knows you’ve published! You don’t have to be tooting your own horn every which way, but just actively talking about your work and even collaborating with other content creators with get you hyped and other people too (and the input and encouragement other fandom members give is just... out of this world. Anon messages helped me finish ADATS when I was really worried I wouldn’t [that’s the truth]. Seriously, support is everything). When you have people excited about your work, you get excited. It’s really as simple as that.
I could go on but this is already horrendously long. I hope even a bit of this helps! If you want to chat or have any more questions, just hit me up any time.
#writing tips#writing help#writing advice#answered#i really hope this helps/answers your question!#i can do something more structured if you want#otherwise here are just my initial thoughts#Anonymous
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youtube
transcript of “where I've been”
TW for discussion of cancer and Covid-19
Here’s the Google Doc link or you can click on the read more.
Techno: Yo, Technoblade here with another upload, oh my God I can’t believe it. We’re back, we’re playing Bedwars, uh, I don’t know why I said that in the present tense because I actually recorded these Bedwars games a few days ago. I have- I’ve played like, almost no Bedwars since the win streak, which was like, I dunno, years ago - so, you know, forgive me if I’m a little rusty. These are literally just the first three games of Bedwars I played, recorded them, and then just threw them in this background footage because, you know, I like live commentaries a lot, but I feel like sometimes, when you have a topic to talk about, having to play a video game simultaneously can sorta- it can sorta detract from the commentary, you know?
But before that: a plushie commercial filmed on my iPhone.
We got the first one - it’s Technoblade. He’s in a flying pose. He’s flying to save some civilians or he’s falling flat on his face. Depends on who you ask. Alright. We got the- We got Technoblade. He’s sitting down. He’s- He’s seated. He’s seated. It’s incredibly exciting. Uh, we got- we got Technoblade but he’s- he’s a giant- he’s a gigantic pillow. It’s Technopillow. This is actually- This is actually really- This is really soft. You’re gonna have to take my word for it.
These plushies go on sale on September 3rd at 3 PM EST at youtooz.com. The last ones sold out in around eight hours, so be prepared. I mean, one of them was like, two minutes but ehhh, it’s not happening again.
So where has Technoblade been? I know I’ve been gone since like, June. I was actually being really productive in July, which I know you guys are gonna- You’re not gonna believe me when I say that because I made no content. But I was! I was, you gotta believe me, okay? I was getting so much work done IRL; I was like, filling out paperwork, making business moves, working on merchandise, buying new equipment to make new videos. ‘Cause I really wanted- I really wanted to increase the rate at which I was making videos, ‘cause I kinda spent- You know, I kinda spent like, all this time becoming a famous YouTube and then instantly like, stopped uploading. Which, I mean, to be fair, I guess that started more in like 2018. So, that’s more just a pattern now.
But I figured, you know, this whole thing where I go two- you know, one or two months without uploading- I don’t want that to be me, man. I wanna be uploading at least once per week. So I spent a lot of time preparing to do that. And the plan was that I would start doing that in August, but I took a- It didn’t- It’s, uh- It’s not going great, I’m not going to lie to you.
So in the last two days of July I noticed that my right arm was starting to hurt a decent amount and I thought- My best guess was that it was some kind of repetitive stress injury, ‘cause you know I’ve been playing video games since the age of like, five. It’s pretty much nonstop. I was gonna get carpal tunnel at some point but, uh, I took a few days to rest my arm and it really didn’t… really didn’t feel any better after that. And so after a few days of that, I looked at myself in the mirror and I noticed that my right shoulder was starting to swell like crazy and I was like, “Oh my God! I must’ve broken a bone, this is-” I mean, this- It looked- it looked crazy.
So, you know, the next day - August 2nd - I, uh, headed over to the doctor to see what was wrong and uh, they ran a couple of scans and then they came back and they told me that, uh, the reason my arm hurts is because I have cancer.
That really couldn’t have gone worse, I don’t think. I feel a bit silly talking about this with, uh, Minecraft in the background; it feels a bit out of place. But I’m a Minecraft YouTuber - I don’t- I don’t do a face cam. Which is I guess how most people would talk about serious things, with a face cam. I also probably, uh- *chuckles* Also probably a bit weird to plug my merchandise in the- in the same video, like, “Hey, guys, I have a- I have a terrible disease, also buy my plushies, bro.” But uh- *laughs* Listen: I’ve been waiting so many months to sell those plushies, bro. And it keeps getting delayed and now cancer thinks it can stop me. No no no no no. I’m trying to make some bank, bro. I wanna get paid, also they look fantastic, I mean just look at them, they look incredible. Alright?
I mean, I guess it would be ideal to like, split up the announcements, but I’m going back into chemotherapy next week; I don’t got time for this, man. We gotta go!
To be fair, I could make this a lot weirder; I could have like, the thumbnail be a giant red arrow pointing to my tumor with the caption “Might die! Not clickbait!” *laughs* Yeah, just the ultimate- the ultimate YouTuber, bro. We’re clickbaiting the whole process.
So after the scans come in, I get transferred to another hospital which has an oncology award, so it’s a lot more specialized towards what I need. And I’m sorta like sitting there in the bed for a couple of days like, “Hello. Could I please get some healthcare? Could I- Could I just get a- Could I just get a crumb of healthcare? Please! Like, I *stutters* I wanna see people sprinting, you know? I feel like I want to see some urgency, you know? If you guys gotta- *stammers* You know, there’s like, this tumor on my arm - if you guys could just- if you guys could just get rid of it. Just get rid of it right now! Could we just go? If you gotta cut off my arm, cut off my arm, bro - do what you gotta do. I won’t complain, man, I’ve won enough Minecraft tournaments. I’ll just play Minecraft with my feet from here on out, bro. I’ll still be B tier at least, okay? It’s fine. Do what you gotta do.”
But then the doctors are telling me, “Oh, well, we can’t- we can’t do it immediately. We gotta- We gotta find out what it is, we gotta run some tests, do a biopsy.” I’m like, “Okay, do the biopsy.” Like, “Oh, well first we gotta do some scans.” I’m like, “Alright, dude, the scans.” And so it took a couple of days and then they did a biopsy, uh, three days later. And then I was like, “Alright. Let’s go!” And they were like, “Oh, well, the biopsy is gonna take like, a week or more to get back.” And I’m just sitting here like, “Bruh, please. Please, just treat me.”
I mean, it makes sense. It makes a lot of sense and I’m sure they know what they’re doing, but I’m just sitting there in the hospital like, “Please. Please, healthcare.” So they get the biopsy and they send me home and they’re saying like, I’ll come back in like a week or so when they have a treatment plan prepared, and so I- It was a very fun week at home ‘cause I was sitting there still not getting treated and I was just like, looking at my tumor like, “Alright, Mr. Tumor. You know, you need me to survive so it’s in your best interest to just- to just chill out for a little bit, you know? We don’t wanna go too crazy.”
And faintly- Faintly if you strain your ears, underneath my skin you can hear:
[Dream’s speedrun music plays for a few seconds]
Techno: Yeah, it was a really fun week. But I did finally get started on chemotherapy, which is a wonderful process. Let me explain chemotherapy. So basically uh, you know how society has progressed for thousands of years of technological and medical innovation? So basically, one of the top three ways we have to fight cancer is uh, for you to go to the hospital and then they uh, plug you into a machine and then they inject poison directly into your veins for several days. That’s uh, that’s one of the best ways we’ve got of going about this and the poison- it’s supposed to kill the cancer - it uh, also kills things like, you know, blood. But ehhh, does anybody really need blood? I feel like it’s pretty optional, you know? Uh- *small laugh* Blood for the Blood God as it were, alright? Uh, I’ll take what I can get.
I, uh, you know, I used to have a channel meme- ‘cause back in the day- you know how my motivation always goes up and down in, like, cycles? I used to have a meme where whenever I’d get super motivated I’d, ya know, I’d start uploading, like crazy. I’d also do things like get a haircut. And, so, I joked that, uh, the less hair I had, the more I’d upload. ‘Cause that’s- the hair was holding me back. And so, if that’s still true, I gotta say, chemotherapy, that’s gotta be daily uploads or something, bro. *laughs* It’s gonna be- Chemotherapy Arc is gonna be fantastic for content.
Well, ya know, after I got diagnosed, I, uh, I’ve been making a lot of phone calls- ya know, informing all of my distant family members about the situation- and, I gotta say, of all the phone calls I’ve made, nobody took the news worse than my health insurance provider. They’ve been inconsolable for weeks. They were like, “You got what!? No!”
I mean, I had no idea they cared so much. They’ve just- oh my God. I- I think they’re the real victims of this. I mean, could you imagine? Could you imagine? Like, look at me! I was a healthy twenty-two year old, I, like, barely went to the doctor, even for, like, regular appointments. I- I guess I went to the dentist, that’s the one thing I did. I was the freest paycheck they’ve ever seen in their lives. They could’ve been milking money off of me for decades. And then, bam, cancer, bro. *laughs* Oh, those poor guys.
Uh, the one- the one favor I- I do wanna ask- If you guys could all do one small favor for Technoblade- uh, you know that coronavirus thing you been hearing in the news for the last couple of years? Uh, I want you guys to get rid of it. Just, uh, I want it gone. Just a couple days should be sufficient for you guys to do that.
No, but, seriously. I’m kind of, uh, immunocompromised right now, which means, uh, if a bacteria touches me or, like, a virus touches me, I will explode. So, yeah, uh, I wanna- get the vaccine, is what I’m saying.
I’m gonna get cancelled by the anti-vaxxers for saying it, but it’s such a good vaccine, bro. Pfizer got full FDA approval, this week, for people aged sixteen and up. I think you- you can also get it if you’re eleven to fifteen if you’ve got emergency approval or whatever. Uh, I mean, if you have any concerns, don’t listen to a Minecraft YouTuber, but, please, at least talk to a doctor. Because it’s- it’s so good bro. It’s so good.
The hospitals are currently getting flooded by unvaccinated people. I’m gonna go ahead and speak on behalf of all cancer patients when I say that it is incredibly annoying when the- when the hospitals are getting overworked by people dying of preventable diseases. I’m just saying- we got dibs on those hospital beds. So, ya know, you- you probably don’t- you don’t even want them really. You don’t even want to need them. So, I think the vaccine… what is it? It, like, reduces the chances of you needing hospitalization from Covid by, like, ninety-six percent? I mean, it’s so effective, bro! Come on! I mean, you might still get, like… I mean, you could still catch coronavirus, but, like, the symptoms are gonna be so much milder, bro, I’m just saying. Think about it. Think about it. Talk to a doctor.
I remember when I first went in for chemotherapy, A: I was thrilled, ‘cause, like, yo! Healthcare! Inject it into my veins, bro! Let’s go! But, also, like, the first couple of days were actually pretty chill. I was like, ‘Dang! This is easy, bro!’. And then it kicked in. And then it kicked in. My energy levels were zero; they were absolutely nothing. It’s hard to describe how tired I was, but I think my one example is- so they let me go back home. And after several days of resting, I had a virtual appointment with a doctor. And, so, they were, like, ‘Alright’. And I was just sitting there, like, ‘Wait a second. You guys want me to sit upright in a chair for an hour? What is this, the Olympics, bro? I’m going back to bed! What? What?’ *laughs* ‘Wha? Let’s calm down here. Sitting in a chair? Am I Superman? Like, come one, bro.’
As you can probably tell, I’m feeling a lot better right now. Which is, uh, I think that’s part of the process, is, uh, you get a little bit of recovery time to, uh, ya know, eat a lot of really good food- get the weight back- and get ready for the next round.
And, uh, before we go back for the next round, I’m gonna be playing a lot of video games, uh, making some content, seeing if I can get some more videos prepared, because, uh- I know people are gonna be like, ‘No! Technoblade! You don’t need to make videos for us! Please rest!’
Nah, this isn’t about you, bro. This is about me. I enjoy this, man. This is, like, one of the safest and most fun things I could be doing right now, bro, I’m gonna do it. I don’t know how much content I could make, ‘cause I’m kinda slow, but we’ll see. We’ll see.
I already have a video prepared for next week, uh, September third. You guys are gonna love it. It’s, uh, it was actually- it’s kind of, kind of an old video. It was, uh, from a few months ago, but it’s very good. So, yeah! You guys have that to look forward to.
And, for the record, I know I’ve been complaining a lot in this video, but I just wanna clarify that the doctors I have are, like, insanely good, bro. I’m gonna be getting some of the finest healthcare in the world, so don’t worry about me too much.
I think the treatment has already started to show some results. I- I mean, it’s been so short of a time, so the results aren’t gonna be insane or anything, but, at the very least, the speedrun music has stopped playing.
So, yeah, that’s where I’ve been and that’s what I’m gonna be doing for the foreseeable future. Wish me luck, and, uh, wear a mask, I guess. Ya know, standard coronavirus procedures. All that coronavirus stuff and like, getting vaccinated - that goes double for Californians, okay? But it helps everywhere.
Uh, that’s all I’ve got for today. See you guys next time!
#transcribed#technoblade#video#bedwars#mod parker#mod garlic#cancer tw#medical tw#needles tw#(he talks about getting vaccinated)
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Ishqbaaz Liveblog, E13: Sensible Things Happen
Check out other liveblogs here
I’m back with the next episode of IB. Kinda interesting and genuinely an episode where I didn’t have much crack material on and was kinda invested in what was happening. Maybe I also liked it cause Shivaay was quiet throughout and didn’t say something that was elitist, harassing type or too terrible to ignore. Lol. Now enjoy the rest of the liveblog!
E13: Sensible Things Happen
- Yay, unlike IMMJ2 there is a hospital here.
- Shivaay has a heart condition? Interesting.
- OMG OM IF YOU EXISTED IN IPK THE STORY WOULD BE DONE IN TWO SECS. Like just as the doc said that the poison was spread by touch - he immediately knew WHICH WOMAN IT WAS EVEN THOUGH HE WASN’T PAYING FULL ATTENTION!
- That means we have Arnav saying “oh no, my love and my brother in law betrayed me” to which Om would be “no bro, Shyam was harassing her. I saw Khushi’s resistance and I actually stayed by the terrace to hear the next half of the sentence”. Ah, Om…
- Detox process? Interesting… I thought they’ll administer the antidote but cool, I’m happy with that I’m seeing.
- Damn, Rudy remembering all the bro advertisements. He is legit remembering all the advertisements. I guess he owned the PR company, no wonder he’s so hurt.
- Ok but seriously, my heart is aching for these two bros.
- You know when the infallible member of the family collapses, everything around it collapses too.
- OH OM AND RUDY, you guys are breaking my heart. Poor boys. Also, thank you for normalizing affection between brothers?
- I WANT TO MURDER THIS BUAJI. YES ANNIKA THANKS FOR THE HONORS. Oh, I like that they put Shivaay’s music to Annika’s anger here.
- NICCEEEEE ANNIKKKKAAAA.
- How is Buaji middle class and having that awesome crockery set?
- I like how Rudy and Om are showing two sides of grief. There’s Om who’s legit taking up all responsibility and Rudy who has collapsed.
- Oh… signing for medical forms is difficult. I am LOVING this episode. Damn Rudy, my heart is breaking for you too.
- Ugh, now I don’t want Shivaay killed. Like not this early.
- Yes, I love this somber version of the bg music.
- Annika is a Wonder Woman. She came back from being falsely arrested and will now free her bro. Thanks black kurta dude for giving info.
- HELLO CUTE WOMAN! YOU ARE SO CUTE. YOU ARE ADORBS. HELLO PRETTY WOMAN. Ooh I like her mehendi.
- HAHAHAHA DUDE ASKING FOR BLACK COFFEE WHEN SHE GAVE WATER.
- Oh, so sweet - they both are cute right now. It’s so nice that she’s showing empathy.
- Damn Shivaay why are you a good bro? *rudy is talking about how Shivaay sheltered him all life to the new person* Ugh now I want him alive.
- Why is the new woman crying? Cutie don’t cry. Why are you here in the hospital tho?
- Damn Rudy, are you gonna make sure that I cry?
- Oh wait, she lost a brother. That’s why she’s crying. Damn. Okay so these two are bonding over their sadness. Emotional connect. I’m shipping these two 50000 times more than ShivIka.
- Oh Rudy and this stranger are SO cute. And I loved it that it was a genuine moment.
- Ok so the theme of the engagement is scarlet red?
- Damn Om getting a Katappa entry in the house.
- I’m ready for everyone’s dread watching Om blood soaked.
- Side note, JHANVI IS LOOKING FABS. IS TEJ BLIND???
- Ok for the first time, I’m loving Pinky, only because her fear for Shivaay is legit. I can finally see she’s his mum.
- Side note again; I love Annika’s outfit.
- Why isn’t Saahil making noise? Poor baby.
- Thanks dude again - I like this helper dude.
- Arrey Saahil you’re so smart. Good baby, you — oh no, she missed her brother.
- Jhanvi and Pinky are bonding???? THIS IS MY FAV BROTP THAT I DIDN’T KNOW EXISTED BUT I NEEDED. You know this is great character development! A classic example of showing depth.
- Can I say Shivaay’s dad is such a good actor. Like without a word he literally shows how devastated he is!
- Yay, Shivaay is safe (I’m only happy for the other bros and storing my hate because I know he’s going to do some real shit to Annika later).
(My feelz for Shivaay:)
- Ok… so this is the new 4Lions aesthetic of putting old songs in between. I see. Interesting.
Yeh Tide Ad
Yeh Masterchef Ad
- Rudy is seriously only remembering the ads. He clearly is the owner of the Obros Models Inc.
- I have a love hate relationship with the song. But I love the brothers and their bond.
- I kinda think they’re overdoing the flashback.
- Kunal, aka Om, is a GOOD GOOD GOOD actor.
- This is, in short, a MAHA ADVERTISEMENT. Can’t figure out for what though…
- Yes Annika, I feel the same. He may have problems, a thousand enemies, everything - but it will never make him less of a villain.
-- The End --
This is one of my fav episodes. One that I was well invested in actually. I didn’t have much meme material cause it was genuinely nice. Just saying.
- JWB
P.S: I was so upset when IB released cause that’s how much of prominence I wanted for all the 3 IPK Bros - Arnav (Shivaay), Akash (Om) and NK (Rudy). So I vowed to never watch this show...
*cough* *cough*
#ib#ishqbaaz#ishqbaaz liveblog#jalebi watches something else#tere liye ttji#liveblog#do I like this because SSO doesn't open his mouth#maybe#just saying
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I'm here for the 16-pages essay about Mace and Eeth :)
LMAO well you asked for that yourself hshsjhsjj *cracks knuckles*
It’s almoust 16 pages long in my google docs, I’m not kidding, so I’m gonna make a little intro and then hide the rest under the “keep reading” thing (also I’m going to shorten it a bit, but nothing significant will be left out, I promise)
Uhm so yes three things for the intro:
1. These takes are based mainly on my ship interpretation of the canon things, so yeah if you don’t want to see the ship material in them they can be easily disagreed with in terms of how correct I see the intentions of the characters behind their words and actions, but BUT you’re here for macekoth aren’t you? So for a macekoth shipper this is a list of totally canon endless happiness and we’ll go with that :)
2. LEGENDS CANON IS CANON (in my heart there is no decanonising of the EU, nooo, I pretend disney didn’t hurt me qwq)
3. I'm not a native speaker and my english is far from perfect so if you think I’m talking strange - yes I am, I’m sorry, but yeah, that’s how we’re rolling here.
And now - moving on to the essay. I will take random pieces of media one by one and explain why exactly I see Mace/Eeth there.
As I call this, “Fantastic MaceKoth hints and interactions, and where to find them”
Star Wars 13: Emissaries to Malastare, Part 1
So, what do we see here? Oooooh, the Concordance of Fealty. In general, the exchange of lightsabers is a very interesting phenomenon in the Jedi Order, and not only because no one remembered it existing before Macekoth decided to engage in one (because there are not known participants in the timeline BEFORE Mace and Eeth, while there are some AFTER) , but also because of its significance. The Concordance of Fealty is said to establish a “master-less learning relationship” between the two Jedi, i.e., a Force-bond that, if not superior, is equally as close and strong as the bond of a master and a padawan, which is said to be the closest bond possible in the Order.
As you see, this ritual required deep mutual trust from both its participants, and here's why: the exchange. of. the lightsabers. I will repeat it once more and even emphasise: THE EXCHANGE. OF. THE LIGHTSABERS.
As Anakin Skywalker said in “The Clone Wars” and Obi-Wan Kenobi said in the “Attack of the Clones”, a lightsaber is a Jedi's life, a thing that one should not part with under any circumstances. And what is the Concordance requiring? Exactly this. Giving away your lightsaber. A voluntary action of entrusting your saber, a product of your own hands, a part of yourself, to another sentient. This act of trust can have a very deep meaning, deep subtext to it, if you want it to.
I’m not saying the Concordance has a romantic subtext to it in general, no - but once again, I’m insisting that if someone wanted it to have a romantic subtext, he had the full freedom to pull a hecking legal jedi WEDDING under the cover story of this ritual.
Why a wedding? Let’s dig a bit more in the comic page above.
How it is depicted, such an exchange of the lightsabers looks suspiciously similar to the exchange of the wedding rings between the spouses. So making a guess that probably by engaging in the Concordance Mace and Eeth tried to pull off a legal wedding within the walls of the Temple in this disguised way seems like a fairly logical assumption. In addition, given that this ritual is stated to be very ancient and therefore long-forgotten, it is not surprising that a very bold plan like that in fact worked right in front of Yoda’s salad.
In addition, you should pay attention to the form in which these vows of the Concordance sound.
Especially this "until one or both of us becomes One with the Force." line.
Very very much like the real wedding vows that spouses say before the altar, huh?))) (For example, I’ll leave this link to the site with some sample wedding vows)
Besides, the fact that Mace had made actual EFFORT to find this Concordance ritual is so priceless by itself.
However, here I tend to think that it was master T'ra Saa who suggested to Mace to search for the ritual and its details, and here are the reasons why.
Master Saa:
1) was in the age of about a thousand of years by the time of TPM because of being a neti (i.e. realistically could be the only one in the Order left who could have remembered this Concordance of Fealty)
2) had her own experience of a romantic relationship, with master Tholme (i.e. she understood the issue of new feelings born between the two Jedi more than the most)
3) T'ra looked after Mace a lot when he was young, so she was literally his mother figure, and to whom can a poor confused with his romantic feelings jedi master go, if not to his tree mom? :З
Shatterpoint (novel) — M. Stover
Here I want to go back to what I said about “the lightsaber is part of the Jedi.” In Stover's novel, there is an episode where Mace looks at Depa Billaba's saber and speculates about whether she could have given it to Nick Rostu voluntarily.
Mace is mentioning the Concordance of Fealty in this novel too!
The curious thing is that Mace asks “Would she give away part of herself?"
So, firstly, by this he is confirming that the Concordance implies exactly this act of mutual trust (what I talked about in the previous part), and secondly, he is hinting that since he did perform this ritual with Eeth Koth, it means that he, Mace Windu, willingly entrusted a part of himself to the hands of the zabrak. (and this is HIS interpretation of what the Concordance means to HIM)
Isn't that an act of true love?)
Jedi Council: Acts of War, Part 3
Here is a peculiar moment in the comic - when the two groups of the Jedi join together in the final battle to confront the enemy yinchorri army, both Mace and Eeth separate each other's names from the rest of the group when talking about several fellow Jedi at once. And if Eeth can have a reason for this, because Mace was the leader of this whole mission in the first place, Mace himself still doesn’t have any rational reasons to underline exactly Eeth’s name (and in the background of the second frame you can see that the first one to run in the battlefield is also not Eeth, which excludes the possibility of identifying Koth as just running the first).
What I want to say by this is that they just subconsciously separate each other's names, because their first thoughts, of course, focus on their dear beloved, and only then they add “and others”.
Also I want to say that consider that MASTER MACE WINDU, the man of the “less talking, more doing” standarts, in the middle of the battle actually FOUND some time to stop and ask how his dear Eeth is doing.
Republic 65: Show of Force, Part 1
In this comic there is not an interaction, but a hint, but even if it's not the most obvious and outstanding, it is still worth mentioning.
Mace returns T'ra her lightsaber, which she lost during the previous battle, and a curious dialogue happens between them.
Master Saa says that the saber is just a tool that one shouldn’t get attached to. And that Mace SHOULD know that. Personally, I see this here as a direct reference to the Concordance of Fealty (which by the time of this comic has been already completed ten years earlier), and as a confirmation that T'ra Saa knows about the nature of the relationship between master Windu and master Koth.
What I think Mace’s tree mom is saying between the lines here: “you shouldn't get attached to a lightsaber. You once owned Eeth Koth’s saber, Mace, so you understand that by "lightsaber" I mean Eeth Koth himself. And you remember that attachments are still forbidden in the Jedi Order, so be careful there with your little horned husband, son."
Given that the events of this comic take place during the Clone Wars, this means that there has already happened the battle on the Petranaki Arena on Geonosis, where Eeth’s LAAT/i exploded in front of Mace’s eyes.
( This thing blowing up in aotc is the LAAT/i on which were Eeth Koth, Sora Bulq and Tarados Gon )
And perhaps he did spend too much time near the zabrak’s bacta tank afterwards and it gave birth to some rumors or concerns - and that is what T'ra Saa hints at. (also, the timeline of this comic is listed as 21 bby, which does not exclude the possibility of also the battle of Korriban already happened, where Eeth nearly died again, and even the torture of Eeth in Grievous’s hands too, which only gives Mace more reasons to go over his usual reserved boundaries in his wish to comfort and protect his beloved)
Star Wars: Episode II Attack of the Clones
A very interesting thing is in one of the deleted scenes of " Attack of the Clones”. And yes, another hint, but wait, some more interaction are coming later. And for now...
I'm of course talking about this scene of the conversation between Mace Windu and Obi-Wan Kenobi before the latter's departure to Kamino. In this scene, Kenobi expresses his concern that Anakin has a strong attachment to the senator from Naboo, and this attachment may cause some troubles for him when serving his duty as a Jedi and as her guardian.
And let’s try to think about the reaction of Windu himself to this statement and how we can interpretate it:
1) He is not surprised by the news on Anakin's attachment, and accepts it very calmly.
2) In this scene, it is actually Windu who calms down panicking Obi-Wan with the words "you must believe that he will make the right choice”, and not vice versa.
What can this mean?
This can mean that Mace is not only not at all shocked by Skywalker's forbidden attachment, but on the contrary, supports Anakin and gives him a chance to make the right choice. I mean, Mace doesn't judge Anakin, Mace sympathizes with the young man in love and he trusts him. It’s a fair assumption that Windu himself most likely has an experience of such a situation, to which he compares the Skywalker’s issue and makes his conclusion, isn’t it?
To sum up?
In this scene, Windu may be probably recalling his own special bond with _someone_, and, drawing from it the conclusion that a Jedi CAN perfectly fulfil his duties even if he has romantic feelings, advises Obi-Wan to trust his padawan with this.
Grievous Intrigue — Star Wars: the Clone Wars 2x09
A small, but very a cute detail: in the episode when a hologram is shown to the Jedi Council, on which general Grievous tortures Eeth Koth and promises the zabrak jedi master "endless suffering” Mace Windu clenches his fists in the background.
And how much was said about the Jedi acceptance, the fortitude, the “letting go of emotions in the Force”… But what acceptance could be here when your small tender husband is being cruelly tortured with the electrostaff???
Before the holotransmition / / after the holotransmition
Star Wars: Zam Wesell
Here is a moment I spotted in this comics: when masters Rancisis and Koth both speak up during a Council meeting, Eeth is the first one Mace answers to. I know that this can seem a little bit weak as an argument but add to this THAT stare Koth gives Windu when applying for being the Alderaan guard.
Yes, exactly. THAT kind of stare right here ( ͡ ° ͜ʖ ͡ ° )
I mean, seriously, man, stop flirting with your Master of the Order husband right in the middle of the meeting!
We know that on Alderaan they make one of the best sorts of wine in the whole galaxy, and you want to offer a date, but calm down a bit please, okay? You don’t want to get caught, right?)))
Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace
No, well, but there is no excuse for the fact that in the background during the scene of the Council meeting before sending Master Jinn and Padawan Kenobi to Naboo as an escort for queen Amidala, Eeth is sitting in exactly the same way in which you could see Windu sitting himself on some of the TPM photos.
That's all, that’s like the final proof that Eeth is a stupid husband and in love with his partner. Because one of the forms of love language? Yes, the one with interest copying, when a person is copying the gestures, the stature and the movements of whom he’s interested in, u-hum.
Eeth really have no, NO excuse for that, I swear
Bonus: The seats on the High Council
As one very wise person on twitter had once said,
This person was referring to Plo Koon and Kit Fisto tho, but I tell you what, this also applies very much to Mace Windu and Eeth Koth.
So here is Mace and Eeth on the Council staring at each other after a holotransmition!
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13.12, heat, ray palmer [m]
Title: heat
Theme: bonfire - look, i swear, this relates to the theme ya’ll. It’s.. bonfire adjacent.
Fandom / Character(s): Legends Of Tomorrow/Arrowverse,Ray Palmer (atom) and OFC, Avaleigh Benson.
Warnings: Filth. Sweet and gentle, loving filth. Unprotected filth. Pretty much it... Kids, go outside. Read a book. This is not for you.
Word Count: 2.5 k, roughly.
And I thought, what better way to start 12 Days Of Christmas challenge from @champbucks this year than to write about Ray. because I love him and I want to. Well, apparently, just writing about him wasn’t enough. I had to write sweet filthy things with him. So, here we are. Enjoy?
Also.. I made the banner. So don’t steal it or repost.
TAGGING:
@chasingeverybreakingwave & @helluvawriter
[ about my writing | masterlist | multifandom tag doc ]
“There’s a snowstorm blowing in. We should stop and make shelter for the night.” Ray stated it matter-of-factly as he nodded towards the abandoned cabin just a few feet ahead in a clearing. I eyed the cabin and then him and snorted, shaking my head no vigorously.
“Ray, no. I’m sure if we keep walking, we’ll be fine. And we might even find the Waverider.”
“We’re stuck.” Ray came to a full stop and whirled around, staring down at me. “We’re stuck and we’re lost. I can’t even tell how far we are from the nearest town, let alone the one we have to be in. It’s safer if we make shelter now. Trust me on this.”
I went silent, biting my lip. The darkness was settling in. The temperature was rapidly dropping too and it only served a reminder that I’d come out with Ray on this mission with my thinnest leather jacket.
My only actual jacket.
We were lost in the woods, in the freezing cold. On Christmas Eve, no less.
I stopped walking because for a second or two, I could’ve sworn that I heard the ringing of a lone church bell. But the wind picked up and I hugged myself real tight, straining to hear over the sound of it howling. “I thought I heard a bell, Ray.”
“Me too. But we need to get inside, okay? It’s freezing out here. You’re freezing.” his eyes roamed over me and he shook his head. He started to remove his own thicker jacket but I shook my head no stubbornly. “I’m.. I’ll be fine, okay? Let’s just.. Get in that cabin I guess.”
Every part of me wanted to object heavily about what I was agreeing to. As a horror fan, I’ve seen what the cabin in the middle of the forest might be home to and frankly, I wanted no part of my skin being made into a suit.. Or being someone’s appetizer.
We were just a few feet from the cabin by now and I stopped, hesitant to get any closer.
“Ray, maybe this isn’t a good idea.” I called out, fidgeting nervously. “What if someone does live here and we burst in there..”
“If someone lives here, then they can at least tell us where the nearest town is.. Maybe even give us a ride. Look. We’re not arguing about this, okay?”
The tone he said it in caught me off guard a little. But it also served to make me realize that I was being childish, to an extent. And probably annoying and or possibly slowing Ray down. The thought had me nodding and going silent.
I took a deep breath as I gazed at the cabin.
“At least knock!” I hissed as Ray stepped onto the porch and approached the door.
Ray knocked and my breath caught in my throat. When the door swung open, Ray peered in and I hissed, “Are you shitting me? Have you not watched a horror movie, sir? It never goes well for the nosy ones!”
Ray stepped into the cabin and I swore up a storm quietly, stepping onto the porch and through the door behind him. Right behind him, literally.
Ray turned back, I guess to tell me that it was safe and all was clear, the cabin was empty, but instead, we found ourselves body to body. I swallowed hard and stared up at him, poking my tongue out. “You know you’re fucking lucky, right?”
“Not lucky. I just know how to tell when a place is empty or not.” Ray shrugged, a hand raising to rake slowly through dark and shaggy hair. I grumbled a little. And it hit me then, neither of us had really taken any decent amount of steps back or away from one another.
Another loud gust of wind blew through, making the old glass windows in the cabin rattle and I hugged myself just a little tighter. Ray rubbed his hands together and then placed them on my upper arms. “This is going to be okay.”
“I know, I’m not scared.” I muttered, even managing to dredge up a halfway convincing eye roll and blow my hair out of my face as if I were just impatient or mildly annoyed at the setback and the situation we found ourselves in.
I was lying when I said it, of course, but I had far too much pride to own up to that. I took a deep breath and spoke up again. “We need to build a fire.. Something. And that fireplace looks like it hasn’t been used in a thousand years.”
“Probably only one hundred, but I see what you’re getting at. First, though.” Ray slipped off his thicker jacket, holding it out to me. Again, I shook my head. Too stubborn to accept the offer. And maybe, too afraid that if I did, having the scent of his cologne in my nose constantly might actually fuck around and be my undoing, at last.
��You’re freezing. Take it before you get hypothermia.” -again with the firm tone, Christ.. Are you trying to kill me, sir?
“Nice try, Raymond. But that tone? Doesn’t always work on me.” I stared up at him, standing straighter, trying to make myself taller. To at least appear that the tone did nothing to me. To seem like I wasn’t quietly panicking. Like my first instinct wasn’t to melt against him and just.. Let him protect me.
Because God knows, it really was. And I didn’t know why, exactly and honestly? That kind of irked me.
The man just has this magnetic pull and I’ve been drawn in since I joined the team four and a half weeks ago.
I spotted an old axe leaning against the stone wall surrounding the fireplace and I stepped away from Ray, wandering over to it. Hefting it up with a quiet grunt.
I turned to find him right behind me and again, to find us body to body. He eyed me and the axe I was holding. “Where are you going?”
“We just established this, sir. We need a fire of some sort. So, I’m going to cut wood. Problem solved as soon as I find a dry enough spot out there to start it.”
I went to step around him and his hand circled my wrist, prying the axe from it gently as he stared me down.
“The only place you’re going is over there. To sit down and warm up. With my jacket. I’ll go find firewood, okay?”
“I hear what you’re saying, but I’m going to have to politely and respectfully tell you no. I can handle it. Besides, I need to… Think.”
And that I did, because as I stood there, another alarming thought came to mind. If we start a bonfire, that’s all well and good, but just how in the hell are we going to manage keeping warm when we’re trying to sleep?
There’s only one way I know for sure will do the trick and… Somehow, I get the distinct impression that Ray Palmer is not going to cuddle up with me all night. No matter how much I may or may not want him to.
He’s kind of been… Distant since I joined the team. Mick told me once over beers that it wasn’t so much me as it was Ray, going through a dark place at the time. He told me to just keep trying with the guy. To give him time and space. He’d come around and then I’d be wishing to all hell Ray would back off.
,, not likely” I found myself thinking as my mind replayed the conversation. In the process, I managed to miss Ray, taking the axe, putting his jacket around my shoulders and walking out of the cabin.
I wandered over to the window and pulled back the rough and ragged plaid covering it, peering out. Ray stood out in the snow, swinging the axe at a tree. I shook my head and laughed to myself softly.
The growling of my stomach reminded me that yes, I’d skipped out on breakfast.. And lunch.. In favor of more research and some alone time in the waverider’s library and I grumbled to myself, feeling around in the pocket of my own thin leather jacket.
When all I came up with was a pack of cinnamon chewing gum, I scowled and tossed it on the table beneath the window. “Naturally, I didn’t eat a fucking thing all day.” I mumbled to myself as I shook my head.
The thought had me wandering to the little area in the one room cabin that served as a kitchen. Peering in the cabinets and cupboard. There was canned food there, but I wasn’t sure how well I trusted my life to it. I mean, it looked relatively new, which I did find strange… Given that the cabin was empty. It was obvious that someone had been here and they’d been here recently.
Maybe it was a hunter’s shack or something. I put all my current nagging concerns about the cabin we’d found out of my head and went back to snooping around. I found a linen closet. A heavy blanket the only piece of actual bed linen stored away inside. And the blanket looked bright and vibrant.. Again, I reminded myself this might just be a hunting cabin. Or someone’s get away for weekends.
The door swung open, making me jump a little in surprise and I ran over, trying to take some of the wood from Ray’s arms.
“Wait a minute, I literally just saw you chopping away at that big tree..”
“Yeah, and I’d still be out there too if I hadn’t found the stack of firewood around the side of the cabin already cut.” Ray dragged a hand across his forehead and I laughed softly, shaking my head a little, despite my best efforts not to, stepping closer to him. The smell of wood and his cologne permeated the air around us and I licked my lips, taking a shaky breath as I stared up at him.
“We need to get the fire going. And you, sir… You need your jacket back. I’ll be fine.” I tapped my foot against old hardwood floor and tilted my head, looking up at him expectantly, waiting on him to take the jacket back.
“Why are you so stubborn?” Ray asked the question, pushing the jacket I’d taken off and held out to him back at me. I held it out again, more insistent. He grumbled, but when he saw that I wasn’t intent on giving in, he took the jacket, slipping it on.
After a few seconds of the most intense silence I’d ever endured in my life, he cleared his throat. And naturally, I was off in lalaland, revisiting the tangent from earlier about just how we’d keep warm while sleeping, so I jumped at least a foot in the air and put my hand over my heart.
“I make you tense.” Ray trailed off.
“No, no. It’s not you. It’s getting used to everything.” I shrugged, a little nervous because he honestly had not one clue just how dangerously close to the truth he was. “This is a lot to take in, sir.”
“You can call me Ray. Or Raymond. Sir’s a little.. Formal.” Ray was stepping a little closer. His hands settled on my upper arms, rubbing them as if he were trying to warm me up. I gulped because suddenly, it felt like all the air got sucked right out of the room.
“I’ve been calling you sir for over a month now and it didn’t bother you before.” I eyed him as I said it, curious. Why was he just now noticing? Why was it just now bothering him? That little sliver of hope sparked up and I tried my best to dampen it. Because surely, he’s not feeling the same magnets pull I am. He gives every sign to indicate otherwise. That he tolerates me, at best. That I might be an annoyance or in his way for the most part.
“It did, I just never said anything.” Ray mumbled, leaning down a little. His hand left my upper arm and smoothed over my hair, tucking it behind my ear. “You’re soaked.”
,, you don’t know the half of it, Ray.” I thought to myself, clearing my throat abruptly. Oh, I was soaked alright...
I should’ve backed away, stepped back.. Done something. Anything.
But honestly, I didn’t want to. I was freezing. Tired from the hike we’d taken from where the Waverider dropped us to here. Panicking because there hadn’t been any word from the team at all for hours now, so we had no way of knowing what was going on until they checked in. Hungry, because of course, I hadn’t eaten two meals today. And most of all, I was more than a little.. Frustrated. By my current little ongoing internal war where my feelings for Ray were concerned.
“Snow is wet.” I muttered quietly, my fingers curling in the front of his jacket. I was trying to will myself right out of anything that might be kicking around in my head. Anything I wanted to do that might just make tonight so much more awkward. I laughed softly, shaking my head.
“What?” Ray questioned, tucking his fingers beneath my chin to make me look up at him.
My mouth opened and closed. I didn’t dare say what was threatening to come out. Because I wasn’t entirely sure if he’d actually stopped to think about it yet, either.
“How are we gonna keep warm tonight?” I finally managed to find a way to phrase what I’d been thinking without seeming too forward or taking the risk of making things awkward as hell.
Ray took a shaky breath. I took at least two. Neither of us were saying anything. The soft bump of our bodies as we migrated closer had me gulping as I made myself hold his gaze. Waiting. Wondering what he’d say.
“Do you have any ideas?”
,, fuck. What exactly do I say here, huh?” I wondered to myself. I shrugged because shrugging was so much easier than opening my mouth and saying what I was really thinking. I raised my hand and dragged it through damp hair, shivering a little as a blast of cold air hit me. Ray’s hands settled on my sides, moving up and down slowly.
“You’re freezing. Let’s go out to the fire.”
I nodded. And for once, I didn’t put up an argument when he started to walk outside. I fell into step beside him, quietly trying to figure out just exactly how to answer what he’d asked without seeming… Forward.
Because the thoughts in my head were anything but proper at the moment. All I could think about was the way hard muscle and the warmth of him felt, pressed up against me cautiously like he had been for a little bit while we were in the cabin.
Ray dragged a thick log over and we sat down on it, staring into the fire.
“Body heat. The answer is body heat.” Ray shattered the silence with those words and I bit my lip, tearing my eyes off the fire to look up at him. He was looking at his hands, a quiet chuckle coming as if the thought only just occurred to him.
I coughed, mostly to cover up the fact that I was reeling more than a little. To make some kind of sound to lift the tension a little. And finally, I found a response. “We’re both adults. Not like it’s a huge deal, Ray.”
Oh, but it was.
I didn’t dare let on how huge, either.
Ray managed a smile, nodding as he swallowed hard. “Right. Not a big deal at all.” he muttered quietly. I huddled against him a little, flashing a smile. His arm slid around me and god help me, I only barely stopped the whimper that was threatening to come out.
“This isn’t so bad.” I muttered quietly, my voice muffled by his jacket.
“It’s not.” Ray cleared his throat and answered, his voice husky. I could feel the warmth of the bonfire we’d made starting to take over, and combined with the body heat between Ray and I, I was starting to feel a little more relaxed.
I yawned and so did he.
“It’s late.” Ray mumbled, barely stifling a yawn as he spoke.
“Or early.” I mused, glancing up at him.
“If we’re going to try and regroup, figure out where we are and how far we are from where we need to be tomorrow, we need rest.” Ray spoke up again after a few seconds. I nodded in agreement.
“I think I saw a blanket in there. Some canned food too.. If we have to stick around.”
“I wonder why the team hasn’t made contact? I hope nothing’s happened.” Ray looked worried when he said it and I nodded again, agreeing with him. “They might have had an emergency stop or something.”
But honestly, it was worrying me too. It didn’t seem like they’d go hours without checking in. And almost as if on cue, the comm devices attached to our wrists went off in unison.
“Ray?”
“Avaleigh?”
“Yeah?”
Ray and I were looking at each other intently, waiting on our team members to speak.
Sara took over.
“How’s everything going?”
Ray and I raised a brow as we shared a look.
“Good? I mean except for us being lost in the forest?” I answered, a brow raised because something sounded off with Sara.
“Shit. The Waverider didn’t land where it was supposed to. Fuck.” Sara swore and took a few deep breaths. “Okay, let me try to track you guys.”
“Thank god. Maybe with some idea of where we are…” Ray trailed off. I held my breath, waiting.
“You guys are almost 10 miles from the town you need to be in. Okay, don’t panic..”
“We’re not.” Ray and I answered in unison. Ray continued, “We uhh, we found a cabin in the woods for the night.”
“Oh, thank god. Tomorrow, you two are gonna want to find a ride into town. We’ll check in again in the morning, bye!”
And like that, Sara was gone. I paced a little, trying to puzzle out exactly what had just taken place, because Sara was acting a little off. “You don’t think they’re in danger, right?”
“No, but I do think they’re up to something.” Ray mused aloud, rubbing his chin. He chuckled quietly, mumbling to himself as he shook his head about whatever it was that he was thinking.
I eyed him. I didn’t ask what he meant, either. I got the feeling that I might not want to know. Especially not given the fact that I know full well that Sara and Mick know exactly how I feel about Ray Palmer… No thanks to my big drunk mouth and lacking inhibitions, or me going all pouty when I got touchy-feely with Ray after a night of bar-hopping with Sara and Mick and then winding up spilling everything to Sara and Mick over beer the next morning at breakfast while Ray was still sleeping in our bunk.
It should’ve been glaringly obvious to me if I really stopped to think about it. But I wasn’t thinking about anything but the current situation.
And how uncomfortable I thought it was going to make Ray feel.
“I don’t… I feel like it’s gotta be a major emergency, otherwise, they’d have checked in before now.” I stretched and promptly hugged myself again when I realized just how much bite the cold air had to it. The fire was getting smaller.
I was so tired that I could barely hold my eyes open. One quick glance beside me showed that Ray was yawning, moving around a little to keep awake and keep warm and rubbing his eyes more than a little.
“We should probably put out our fire for now and go inside.. Try to figure out the sleeping thing.” I stood abruptly, because I was suddenly filled with energy and tension all at once. And not a bad tension either…
Ray, on the other hand… I was almost 1000 percent certain that he was either silently freaking out or silently annoyed that he was stranded here overnight with me and that we’d have to resort to body heat to keep warm.
Before he could say or do anything, I sprang up, hurrying towards the cabin. The one blanket I’d seen earlier looked reasonably thick, so that was a plus I supposed. By the time Ray stepped in and shut the door to the cabin tightly behind him, I was unfolding the blanket.
I sat it to the side and slipped off my jacket, emptying the contents of the pockets on the table and when I heard the heavy clink of metal against wood, I smirked and grabbed for my father’s lucky Zippo.
I’d seen some candles in a drawer earlier too.
Turning my back to Ray, I busied myself digging through the drawers until I found the candles. My eyes settled on a row of old glass beer bottles lining the windowsill as if someone had been using them for makeshift vases.
When I couldn’t get the candles to fit properly, I took the bottle and hit it against the side of the heavy wooden table. The neck shattered away from the bottom portion and I took a candle from the box, shoving it down inside. I lit the candle and moved on to the next candle and bottle doing the same until I had all of the bottles filled with a candle and all of the candles lit.
I stuck my hand against the table and grimaced the second I felt a little shard of glass dig into the top layer of skin on my palm. “Ouch.”
“Let me see it.” Ray had just been standing there, leaned against the door, watching me and looking as if he were lost in thought until I got the glass stuck in my hand. Then he was across the room and at my side, reaching for my hand.
I squirmed, because a fun fact here… I am an actual giant baby when it comes to any sort of pain or illness. And the shard of glass had dug down into my palm pretty deep at this point.
“I’m fine. If you find my pocketknife there on the table, just hand it to me.” I nodded towards the spot on the table that my pocketknife had settled on when I emptied my jacket.
Ray eyed me as if I were losing my marbles. “You’re not fine. That’s in there pretty deep.”
I blew at my bangs and tapped my foot. “Hello, which one of us was basically living on her own at 11? I’ve got this, Ray.”
“You do realize you don’t have to do everything yourself… Right? Besides, I know where that knife’s been. I’ve seen how you use that knife. It’s definitely not sanitary to go digging out a shard of glass with.” Ray wasn’t letting go of the gentle grip he had on my wrist. I gazed down at the way he held my wrist in his hand and gulped to myself because it hadn’t ever really occurred to me just how big his hands were in comparison to my wrist.
Then again, to be fair.. He’s not been the touchy sort.
Until tonight.
And neither have I… Until a few nights ago when I went out bar crawling with Sara and Mick and proceeded to make an entire idiot out of myself flirting with the man when we all got back to the Waverider.
When I realized that we were migrating closer together all over again, I tilted my head, looking up at him quietly. “Fine. Go ahead, Dr.”
I flashed a smirk, even though every part of me was dying to snatch my wrist out of his hand because I am… Not a fan of pain. And I’m so used to doing all this stuff for myself that I wasn’t entirely sure I trusted anyone else to do this stuff for me but me.
I jumped and flinched as he carefully tried to push the shard of glass to the surface of my skin. If I flinched and fidgeted any harder, I probably would’ve flown through the roof. Ray stopped and looked at me calmly.
“What? It freakin hurts, okay?” I babbled. Flinching again a second later when Ray caught hold of my wrist gently all over again and tried one more time to work the shard of glass to the surface.
“Are you done now?” Ray asked, his eyes locking on mine for a few seconds. If I thought the tension between us was high before, it felt… So much higher now.
So much higher. I almost couldn’t breathe.
“Okay,alright.” I tensed just to keep from squirming. Ray eyed me and I bit my lip because the look in his eyes was… Definitely an intense one. Smouldering. His touch got even more gentle and I didn’t think that was possible, given what he was trying to do. “Count to three out loud, Avaleigh.”
“One, two” and before I got to three, he was chuckling, holding the thin shard of glass up a little as he gave me a teasing grin. “Got it.”
“I didn’t even feel it, how?” I mumbled after a few seconds of staring.
Ray merely shrugged. He nodded to a stack of mattresses in the corner of the room, in front of a floor to ceiling window. The moon flooded the area with light and only added to the mood set by the lit candles, the flames shadows dancing on the walls. “We should probably get settled in.”
I eyed the mattresses for a second or two, shuffling my feet as I cleared my throat. I intended to answer him verbally, but the only sound that came was me, clearing my throat. Instead, I managed a nod and finally, my mouth seemed willing to work again.
“I put the blanket on that stool over there.. I’m gonna get comfortable.”
“Get comfortable?” Ray questioned, fidgeting slightly as he gazed down at me. His hand was lingering at my side and just the way it felt had me swallowing down a lump in my throat. If he had any clue how I actually felt, I found myself thinking, he wouldn’t touch me at all. Or I don’t believe he would.
“Silly man.” I stopped in front of him and tilted my head, flashing a bit of a teasing smirk up at him as I continued, “I’m an actual human furnace at night. I can’t sleep in layers.”
Ray coughed abruptly and for a second or two, yeah. I felt smug, because I got it in my head I was right. He wasn’t interested in me at all. In fact, I’d probably just made things awkward. Which bothered me, but for the time being, my weird brain being what it was, I chose to take comfort in the fact that yet again, I was right. I absolutely had to be. All the signs were there.
I slunk across the room, stopping in front of the door to the bathroom that I’d found earlier, while Ray was out getting wood for the fire we built outside. Pulling the handle, I stepped inside and after taking several long and deep breaths to center myself again, because god knew, all the touching and the looks and that firm fucking tone he kept taking with me tonight were all.. Combining to take it’s toll… I proceeded to strip down to my underwear and the thin strapped long tank top I’d had beneath the black and gray striped sweater I’d been wearing. Then I stopped and thought about it, and swearing under my breath, I slipped the thin sweater back down over my head too.
No sense in making him feel even more uncomfortable than he already did.
I could make it one night sleeping half clothed instead of naked as I preferred.
I stepped back out into the main part of the cabin and stretched, making my way over to the mattresses, walking right past Ray as I did so. I flopped down on the pile of mattresses, wiggling around until I got as comfortable as I could while still leaving Ray some room. Ray made his way over to the mattresses, carrying two of the candles over, sitting them on the little stool sitting next to them. And he bent, about to climb over me to settle in behind, pausing, hovering over me and staring down.
I bit my lip, staring right back up at him. It felt like everything around us just sort of...Froze. Or disappeared altogether.
He leaned down a little. “This is okay… Right?” he asked quietly. The way his voice dropped almost to an intimate whisper had me barely biting back a whimper.
“We’re adults, Ray. It’s fine. Besides, I don’t fancy being taken out by hypothermia, okay? I.. Trust you.”
“You trust me.” Ray repeated quietly, getting the slightest hint of a goofy grin as he did so. I licked my lips and tried not to stare at his mouth. More to the point, just how close it was to mine right now. Or the way it felt, with him lightly pressing into my body from above. I wiggled a little before I could stop myself, causing us to rub together. He sucked in a breath. Kept staring down at me, biting his lip.
“I just said that, didn’t I?” I mumbled, mostly to break the silence hanging heavy in the air. To distract myself from what my mouth really wanted to do at the moment. He chuckled quietly, nodding down at me with that goofy and bright grin still plastered on his face. “You did.”
“Are you getting in? Or do you want me to move over…” the question was asked awkwardly. I was horrible at this. The worst. You’d think that knowing I had not a snowballs chance in hell with Ray Palmer would make me bolder somehow, but it didn’t.
It only made each touch… every single one, accidental or not… that much more intimate. It had me tense because I couldn’t even catch my breath around the man right now. I was stuck in a cabin with him overnight and it only amplified the fact that I wanted what I couldn’t have.
Ray swallowed hard and climbed over me, settling in behind me. He started out lying on his back, his arm behind his head. I tried to hug the side of the mattress that I was on, despite knowing that we were supposed to be trying to keep body heat between the two of us. I just… Couldn’t.
“This isn’t going to work…” Ray spoke up and I rolled over to face him, biting my lip. “It will. And this blanket is thicker than I thought.” I mumbled the words, lost in his eyes. He shook his head and insisted, “We’ll never keep enough body heat between us to stay warm with you trying to hug the edge of the bed, Avaleigh.”
“I didn’t want to crowd you.” I muttered in a daze, still staring.
“You won’t be. And you feel like you’re freezing. Human furnace my ass.” Ray air quoted what I’d said before getting into bed, his words falling away as he started to stare at me all over again. I moved just a little closer. “Better?” I inquired as I yawned.
“You can get closer. I can’t keep you warm if you’re still halfway off the bed, Avaleigh.”
I moved a little closer. Our bodies were brushing together now. My heart may have fluttered a little because I could feel hardened muscles pressing against my body and the contrast felt so good. My breath caught in my throat as he put an arm over me and he eyed me.
“Are you okay?” Ray’s quietly mumbled question sent a shiver right through me because I’d been adrift in my own thoughts and internal conflict and I forgot how close we were lying together.
“Yeah, I’m fine. This is good.” I flashed him my best grin. Inside? I was… melting. Literally dying to get closer. Even though I was body to body with him in the little bed already. I felt his fingertips digging into my lower back just a little and I was pulled even closer. Somehow, my head wound up nestled just above the center of my chest and when my lips brushed right against bare skin, I felt his body shiver beneath them. His fingertips dug in even more.
I bit my lip, raising my head to look at him as if I were asking if it were okay. He chuckled quietly and his other hand wound up dragging slowly through my hair. Catching here and there, playing with strands before tucking beneath my jawline. His mouth inched closer to mine and time seemed to slow to a stop.
It felt like a lifetime, but his lips brushed mine clumsily. My hand raised, lingering on his shoulder for a second or two. But that didn’t feel right somehow, so I moved it, my fingers dragging through shaggy and dark hair, tugging at it lightly, just to be greedy and deepen the kiss.
I never imagined Ray Palmer liked to bite when he kissed. I’d always just… sort of thought it’d be soft and clumsy, gentle like I know he is. But this kiss was so much more than that. It was gentle and yet it felt desperate. Full of desire. His mouth locked on my bottom lip and I whimpered into the kiss. He pulled me partially on top of him and I trailed my tongue over the outline of his mouth hungrily. His fingers tangled in the ends of my hair, gathering it at the back of my neck and using his grip to pull me into the kiss even deeper. When he bucked into me from below, I whined into his mouth, rocking right back against him.
The kiss broke and we pulled apart, gasping for our next breath, wide eyed. I swallowed hard, preceded immediately by a few shaky breaths and my mouth opened and closed as words failed me all over again, but Ray was already raising to sit, putting me in his lap with my legs wrapped around him.
This is not how I pictured tonight going by any stretch of my imagination and I was frantically combing back over the way it had gone so far to try and piece things together and figure out if I’d missed anything somehow.
“You’re overthinking. You always get a wrinkle in your brows.” Ray muttered in a husky tone against my mouth, smirking at me a little.
“Oh, I’m overthinking, huh?” I challenged.
But one of us had to think a little. And honestly, my mind was still blown.
Ray’s hands moved up and down my sides gently. That hungry look was back in his eyes again and I gave up trying to puzzle it all out. I knew what I wanted. Obviously, this was what he wanted at the moment.
The hungry gaze turned serious and he pulled me in more, rocking me right over the way he strained at his jeans, which he’d opted to keep on. I hissed against his mouth, a whine coming on the tail of the sound. “Ray.”
“Want you so much, darling. It’s driving me insane.” he muttered against my mouth as it fell open willingly. His tongue trailed over my lips, then outlined my teeth, before finally meeting mine in a deeper and slower kiss. A kiss he seemed determined to draw out until neither of us could breath on our own and were breathing together instead.
His hands roamed more, moving lower down my body. Slow. Gentle and deliberate as if he were learning every single curve to my body to commit to memory.
“I’m right here. I’ve been right here the whole time. You have no idea how much I want you. How much I care… I love you.” I blurted it out, a quiet helpless whisper against his lips before I could restrain myself and the fact that the words were out there felt so freeing.
I melted against him completely, my legs squeezing the sides of his body as they circled his waist. When the kiss broke, I took his face in my hand, dragging my thumb over his lower lip, leaving it to quiver as I did so.
The more I rocked against him, the louder his groans got against the shell of my ear. The harder his fingers dug in and the more his hands roamed my body. Fingers gripped the hem of my sweater with precision and in a split second, he was tugging the thin garment up and over my head, letting it settle on the floor as his mouth continued to dominate mine hungrily. “Say it again, Avaleigh.”
“Say what?” I asked the question despite knowing full well exactly what I’d just said and what he wanted me to repeat. And given what Sara told me about how close he’d been to Kendra and just how that had ended, I kind of had the feeling I knew exactly why he needed me to repeat it.
“You know what you said, sweetheart.” Ray’s tone was thicker, laced heavily with desire he wasn’t bothering to hide now. That hungry look in his eyes was so much hungrier when they fixed on mine as he pulled away to stare and roll his thumb over my swollen and bruised lips.
“I love you.” I meant it and I’d say it a thousand times, but at the particular moment, I said it because I’d do anything to get his lips back against mine. His hands wandering all over me again, squeezing and rubbing. Touching me in that gentle way. I’d never felt quite that special in my life.
His touch had me melting. His kisses had me addicted.
My fingertip trailed down the center of his chest, toying with the button to his jeans as I rocked against him urgently. I could feel my underwear soaking through and I knew he had to feel it, there had to be a wet spot forming on his lap where I was sitting, grinding myself against the bulge strained at his jeans.
“I mean it, Ray.” I promised, pulling his face closer, my mouth latching onto his lip, nipping and sucking until he was bucking himself right up into me and moaning into my mouth as my tongue slipped between his lips when they parted. His hand dragged through my hair and settled on the back of my neck, pulling my mouth in completely as he deepened the kiss and took over, a low growl hanging in the air only to be swallowed by the kiss just before it broke and we took a few seconds to breathe.
“I love you too. Kind of why I kept my distance, Avaleigh.” Ray admitted quietly, a sigh following as his shoulders dropped a little, almost as if he were ashamed to admit it. “Then the other night when you came back and you were touching me and flirting, I..” before he could finish, I was melting against him all over again, my fingers tugging impatiently at the waistband of his jeans, snagging the button and pulling it free from the buttonhole. His teeth scraped against my bottom lip.
“You’re sure?” he breathed out against my mouth, his breath shaky. I licked my lips and nodded, not a second's hesitation. My finger trailed slowly over the zip of his jeans and his breath caught in his throat.
“Ray, c’mon… Please?” I begged, rocking myself over the bulge and bearing down just a little harder as I did so, an urgent and needy whine escaping my throat. Ray’s hand slipped down between us, palm settling against my soaked panties and he growled as he closed the distance between our mouths and bodies all over again.
“You’re so wet already… How? I haven’t done anything.” he mumbled lazily as he worked me onto my back, positioning his body between my legs to keep them open. His hand cupped and squeezed me through my underwear and he leaned down, mouth catching against mine clumsily, a brief little peck as he moved from my mouth down the front of my throat.
I never once stopped to think that Ray might like to bite.. But his teeth latched onto soft skin and a shiver raced through me as I raised my arms, wrapping them around his neck. My fingertips dug into muscular shoulders just a little deeper and his body tensed and released tension under my fingertips as he crashed his mouth against mine all over again after his mouth ventured up my neck and met my lips all over again because I was whining, begging him for another kiss.
We’d both long forgotten about how cold we were. We’d both forgotten about any earlier awkwardness. Everything was just rapidly melting away and suddenly, I was dreading tomorrow when we’d have to leave the solitude of our little found paradise behind.
One of his hands wound up on my thigh, squeezing as he rocked himself against me and his other hand cupped and squeezed my dripping sex, practically growling every time his hand came away a little wetter than before. I rose to sit as best as I could and lowered my hand, tugging impatiently at the slipping waistband of his jeans, gazing up at him as I swallowed down the lump in my throat.
He nuzzled his nose against mine and chuckled softly, slipping from between my legs to stand, letting his jeans hit the floor and pool around his ankles. He kicked them free and they settled on the floor a few inches away from my discarded sweater. Then he was lowering himself all over again, settling between my legs and his hands were all over me. Slipping beneath my tank top and working it up, letting me raise up so that he could pull it off and toss it over his shoulder before gently pushing me flat against the mattress all over again, a hand at either side of my head as he rocked into me and I met each barely clothed thrust with a thrust of my own, my moans echoing quietly into the room surrounding us and disappearing into thin air.
My hand slipped down between our bodies almost around the same time as his fingers caught in the banding of my panties and the quiet rip of fabric filled the air between us. He tossed them on the floor and I tugged at the waistband of his boxer briefs, pouting up at him. He rose up, letting them hit the floor, kicking them free at his ankle to join the growing pile of clothing on the floor around the mattresses already.
And then he was pressing himself against me completely. Carefully, as if I were made of glass. Touching me all over, his mouth dancing all over my skin and when he wasn’t kissing, touching me, he was staring down at me with this look of total adoration in his eyes and I was looking back up at him the same way.
He leaned down to kiss me and our faces bumped making both of us laugh softly. His hands slipped down to my sides, gripping and as soon as I felt his thick cock graze right against my folds, I whimpered and rocked myself up into him just for more friction. As if all the friction I’d gotten earlier wasn’t enough. I was aching, throbbing even. I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anything in my life.
“Sorry.” he apologized and I giggled, playfully latching onto his lower lip with my teeth and rubbing myself against him as much as I possibly could. His cock brushed against my center again and I whimpered, catching hold of his face, mumbling against his mouth in a pleading whisper, “Ray, please. Need you now, baby.”
“Now, huh?” Ray muttered back against my mouth. His fingers squeezed my sides as he started to bury himself inside me slowly, peppering kisses over my face and neck, his thrusts long and slow. Our hips smacked softly with the connection of each one and I sighed in content as his forehead rested against mine and we locked eyes. My breath caught in my throat as the tension really melted away. I could feel him stretching me, and it felt so good. Amazing.
My hands wandered up, resting on his shoulders, my fingertips digging into them lightly. Carefully, because I didn’t want to hurt him and I didn’t know if he’d be the type to appreciate marks left behind in the morning.
Then his mouth broke from mine, moving slowly down the front of my throat.. Dragging across my collarbones and up the side of my neck, dancing lightly over my pulse before latching lazily on exposed skin. I could feel the mark forming as he kissed and sucked my neck and I moaned, rocking my hips against him just a little faster, desperate for him to pick up the pace, needy as hell.
“Ray, oh.. Fuck. Raymond.” I moaned out, writhing beneath him. My fingertips dug into his shoulders just a little bit. If he was going to leave marks and everything, I was going to. My hands were all over him, leaving where they rested on his shoulders to slip down, gently dragging my fingertip down his chest or move my hands over his sides.
Something about me using his full first name as opposed to merely calling him Ray had him snapping. His hips snapping against mine faster, a little harder. His touches got a lot more.. Intense. His teeth tugged at my lower lip and his hand slipped up my side, resting against my neck, his fingers caressing my cheeks. He rolled a thumb over my kiss swollen lips and gave a loving gaze. “Warm enough, Avaleigh?”
“Getting warmer.” I whimpered as he drove deeper, his hips smacking softly against mine with each deep thrust. My hands drifted back up, over his biceps, resting on his shoulders again, gripping and squeezing each time he managed to bottom out or hit my spot and make me moan just a little more. His mouth crashed against mine all over again, a kiss so deep that I forgot to breathe somewhere in the middle of it all. “That’s good.” the soft tone combined with the low gravel of his voice had me biting my lip as I stared up at him, raising a hand, dragging my thumb over his bottom lip.
Every single touch felt so gentle and intimate between us that I was honestly just a step away from going into overload. It was like something in both of us snapped. We couldn’t touch or kiss, rub against each other enough. I absolutely loved it.
My legs raised, wrapping around his hips. The new angle had him groaning into my mouth as our mouths collided all over again. His hands moved down my sides, one settling on my thigh and the other on my hip as he continued to plow into me, driving my body into the pile of mattresses just a little. The kiss broke, his mouth wandering down my neck, leaving a string of bruises and bites behind that I barely felt because they were that gentle.
“Feels so good.” he mumbled in a daze, stopping to rest his forehead against mine again and stare into my eyes as he worked on catching his breath and I worked on catching mine, pouting because I’d been so damn close to an orgasm shattering through me and again, he stopped. His breath tickled the shell of my ear as his mouth brushed against it and he whispered quietly, “So beautiful.”
“Look whos talking, handsome.” I managed to moan out the words as his thrusts sped back up all over again, only to slow when I could feel my body starting to coil and tense as my orgasm started to build all over again.
The soft and goofy grin he gave as I said it had me giggling against his mouth softly. Our bodies were fully pressed together and his hands glided all over mine, not resting or lingering too long in one certain area. “I love this. I love you. So much, princess.” the lazily muttered words against my skin had my breath catching in my throat and before I could stop myself, I was repeating them. “I love you too, Ray… Ah- oh.. Right there.” I moaned out as I felt his cock strike my spot and bottom out, my orgasm threatening to shatter through at any second. I almost couldn’t hold back anymore.
My fingertips dug into his side and his lower back, driving him even deeper inside and his mouth crashed against mine, a deep and needy kiss that seemed to deepen even more with each meeting of our bodies and deep thrust into my dripping sex. “Raymond.” I moaned out, my back arching. Ray coaxed quietly, “C’mon, sweetheart. Let go for me.” as his lips left mine, roaming down the front of my throat, teeth grazing against skin.
I needed no further coaxing. My orgasm shattered through, leaving me whimpering and clinging to him as I kept rocking my hips upward to meet his thrusts. His thrust got more erratic with each one and he was kissing me anywhere he could get his mouth, nipping and biting, his hands gripping my body as he fucked into me faster and deeper. “Oh.. Mmm. Taking me so well, darling.” he growled against my neck huskily as his lips locked on my skin, leaving another mark behind. “I don’t want to stop.” he trailed off, me surprising myself when my response was to say “Don’t stop. Don’t you dare stop, Ray.”
I could feel him throbbing, filling me up as he pulled me closer, held onto me tighter and his thrusts slowed down, eventually coming to a stop. As he worked on catching his breath, his hand moved over my face tenderly and he stared down into my eyes.
“Merry Christmas.” he gave a goofy smirk as he said it and I could my cheeks flaming up. I pulled him down almost completely on top of my, my arms going around his neck. His hands cradled the back of my hair, fingertips tangling in it as his forehead rested against mine and we both yawned and worked on catching our breath, kissing softly. He fell to the spot in bed next to me and pulled me on top of him, his arms locking around me to hold me in place and kissed the bridge of my nose, laughing when I yawned too.
“We should probably attempt sleep. We have.. A long day tomorrow.”
“Lots of walking.” Ray mused, squeezing me tighter.
#12 days of christmas#12daysofchristmas#ray palmer fanfiction#ray palmer one shot#ray palmer imagine#ray palmer imagines#ray palmer fanfic#my writing; ray palmer#my fics; ray palmer#my one shots; ray palmer#// no one under 18+#s*ut ahead
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• stress-free | kwp
ykcyj ➝ arskyh
title: stress-free
pairing: kim wonpil (of day6) & you (she/her pronouns)
genre: FLUFF, college!au
words: 3.4k
author’s note: @pirimiritiddy requested a fic about wonpil, and here it is. it went on for longer than i previously planned, buuuuut. i hope it’s still okay aaaa
(this is the 1st time i’ve written something for wonpil so if i get his personality wrong, i do apologize. i am also a baby myday huhu)
this dot fic (bullet style) is part of the falling asleep on the bus scenario that i intend to write for each day6 member. check out the others: dowoon (currently only 2/5 completed)
any requests? check my pinned post if i’m accepting any at the moment, thanks!
wonpil hates his schedule for this winter term
who assigns a class that is only available at seven in the evening??
3 times a week
during THE WINTER
did he mention it’s a major lecture he’s required to take??
psychology of stress, more like
this class is giving him the kind of stress it is specifically warning its students about
anyway, what can he say. he chose this major, there’s only 1 more term after this one and then finally: graduation
it’ll be fine, he’ll live
thank the heavens they didn’t need to attend the first two meetings, but some reading material was provided
and was expected by the professor to have been read and reflected upon
the class is really living up to its name because when wonpil opened the pdf
it was 30 pages of tiny font sized sentences (for ants!) about the definition of stress and how it affects every part of the body yada yada yada
wonpil tried. he really tried
that is to say he fell asleep on his desk while going over the same 20th page of the document
if it weren’t for jae shaking him awake, he’d miss his first night class
it would’ve been nice… if only the professor didn’t take attendance (something about being generous enough to make the first 2 classes “free,” so everyone has an obligation to come in for the remainder of the semester)
great, he’s stuck freezing his ass off just walking to the bus stop alone
hopefully they turn the heater all the way up in the auditorium or else
the thousands spent in tuition would have literally been for nothing
overdramatic wonpil, can you blame him
he thinks about reading the remaining 10 pages on the bus, even if he knows nothing of value will be absorbed
he wants to tries anyway, he does feel a little bit refreshed from that impromptu nap
the bus has arrived, and it’s packed as usual; a lot of the students riding the shuttle are just yet to take off in the following stops
wonpil squeezes his way inside, 30 pages of stress psychology research gripped in both hands
“excuse me, sorry,” wonpil mumbles, eyeing for a spot to sit to make him comfortable
because once all the people standing up leave, it’s usually a race for the exit
he’ll never understand college students
finally, he sees an empty seat way in the back. there was a girl on one end and two other students who seem to be ready to get off on the right side
wonpil doesn’t mind sitting next to someone, but once those 2 are gone he’ll just scoot over to give the girl on the left some privacy
she seems very much in deep sleep anyway, wonpil wonders if her stop is coming or she’s riding to go to campus?
wonpil doesn’t have time to think about other people, it causes him unnecessary stress
once sat down, his eyes focus on the last page he left off of
the words register as gibberish in his brain, and with the bus moving so much it makes it even more difficult to follow along the paragraphs
wonpil takes in a deep breath, holds it in, and sighs very heavily
his patience is usually the best out of his friends, but this class is turning more and more into the psychology of how to get you stressed tf out instead
the bus nears its next stop, and the two people on his side stand up to leave, yes he can breathe normal air
however
hold on
his shoulder feels heavy
turning his head slightly, for some reason once the bus had stopped its engine the girl’s head had flipped over to lean against wonpil’s shoulder instead
oh no oh no oh no
his shoulders suddenly freeze, as if blasted with a ray gun filled with ice
it’s heavy and he can’t move, it’s numb and this girl’s hair is splayed all over his his sweater
and she
she smells of coffee, and wonpil inhales it in
it’s not foul or anything, but it’s definitely exuding notes of espresso bean and freshly roasted coffee
it makes wonpil feel a little more awake
but he still can’t move his shoulders, and suddenly he’s panicking because the bus started moving again and even though capacity has lessened by 80%
someone decided to sit on the other end of the row he’s at
so if he even attempts to move, he’ll still be seated next to someone
wonpil grumbles, lower lip jutting forward
something shifts
and he realizes he shook his shoulders a little bit with his frustration
“ah…” he exclaims inaudibly, panicking at the possibility that he had woken her up from her nap
wonpil tenses up, shoulders stiff and eyes peering at his side to see what she’s up to
she lifts her head just a few inches off of wonpil’s shoulder, and for a moment he’s relieved that maybe she realizes what’s going on
but wonpil only hears a soft yawn coming from her, and she returns to using his very rigid shoulder as her pillow during this bus ride
let’s just say that the next thirteen minutes was more stress-inducing than wonpil wanted it to be
right when the bus reaches the final stop (main campus), wonpil exerts any and all efforts he has to shake his shoulder, up and down, enough to elicit an awake response from this stranger
the moment he feels her let up, wonpil dashes through that bus door like there’s no tomorrow
he is greeted with the coldest wind hitting his face, and his shoulder feeling numb from all the.. pillow roleplaying it did, if you will
wonpil feels bad, borderline guilty for leaving her like that— what if she’s asleep until now?? he can almost hear soft snores from her end for a minute there, too, and it took so much of wonpil to resist chuckling at it while in panic mode simultaneously
suffice to say, he was not able to read the rest of the document
in wonpil’s defense, he had encountered it first hand — how stress overcomes one’s body and mind
he forces himself to focus on what’s ahead, as boring as it sounds
he enters the lecture hall with a few minutes so spare, deciding to sit in the back
the projector screens are big and wonpil is not about to take his chances of getting called on today
luckily enough, he finds a row with visibly no other student sitting around the area
shoulder feeling more alive, he comes back to his senses as well
he takes off his outer sweater as it had become toastier inside. he still had a couple layers beneath his clothes
as the professor starts talking, wonpil finds himself yawning a few times
he doesn’t know if the video playing on screen is boring him or the girl in the bus affected his sleepiness
suddenly he remembers the smell of coffee, and how that’d sound real good right about now
he slaps both of his cheeks lightly, trying to take him back in the zone of at least writing down important notes
he’s on the fifth bullet point of his note-taking when the door behind him opens abruptly
it wasn’t loud or disrupting to the whole class, virtually no one even batted an eye
but thats because they’re far from the door
and wonpil is literally ten feet away, so when he feels the cold suddenly hit his back he had to know the source of the sudden hit in temperature
the class hadn’t been going on for less than an hour, and there have been students coming in on the other end of the auditorium
so wonpil isn’t that surprised that another student has just arrived
he caught a glimpse of her hair, but that’s about it as wonpil goes back to his tedious notes
until the very same person scoots herself in wonpil’s row
he huffs under his breath, the illusion of some privacy now shattered
with a polite (semi-forced) smile, wonpil turns to the side to greet his classmate
again, wonpil becomes frozen in spot
kind of like when you feel a magnetic pull somewhere, you follow it
and then suddenly you see it from afar, not believing your eyes if it’s actually real; if it’s actually there
in wonpil’s case, he’s one seat away from her
recognizing the flow of her hair, but more importantly
that distinct scent of coffee beans from her clothes
this time, wonpil has a clear look on her face and he’s… speechless
his polite smile has turned into a look of awe, eyes glued towards her
she senses his gaze, turns to him and quickly bows down as a polite greeting
“sorry, but has the class been going on for a while?”
she speaks
“oh, um, what— what?”
“oh,” she looks confused, but rephrases her question, “what time did the class start? i had a hard time finding this lecture hall.”
she’s talking to him, not just leaning her head on his shoulder
“seven”
was all wonpil could say
“it started at 7? cool, i’m not that late then!” she cheers, grinning shyly. wonpil watches the way she puts a strand of hair tucked beneath her ear. she’s pulling out her laptop from her bag when she notices a pair of wide eyes still on her person
“is… is this seat taken?” she asks, and wonpil hasn’t even taken in the fact that this is the same person from the bus
“yes”
tongue-tied wonpil strikes again, blinking back his own obliviousness to her question
“i mean— no, now it is, by you. you’re sitting there, um, i— feel free to sit wherever you want”
he’s scrambling for his words, flustered cheeks heating up amidst the warmth of the room
she just nods her head in understanding, and wonpil finally realizes he’s been staring at her direction for longer than he should have
“STRESS”
the professor verbalized into her mic which causes wonpil to look to the front all of a sudden
right, right. he’s at a lecture. what’s gotten him so fidgety and embarrassed and now all that he’s pretending to type on his google doc is
sdfjfjdfhshllsghgjghsh
just so he looks busy next to the girl who fell asleep on him on the bus
was there any point in preoccupying his mind with thoughts of her, and her head resting on him? no it’s stupid, wonpil knows this.
people do it all the time, by accident, due to exhaustion, they don’t mean a thing by it
but wonpil is curious, and this is going to kill him. for sure
so he peeks at her again, and like a normal, decent student that she is (compared to wonpil at this point let’s be real) her hands are busy hand writing whatever the professor was saying
meanwhile, wonpil continues to sdfjskgnglddfjs his way to a passing B in this class
even in this large, spacious lecture hall he can still take in her scent
maybe it’s a new perfume that’s up and coming, that’s why it smells so strongly on her
oh! he can ask that? hey, do you mind sharing what line of perfume you’re using? it smells really good
it sounds like a common question, right? i mean if you wear strong fragrances you’re bound to be asked a question about it
he’s about to ask, he really was so ready to ask, what was he gonna lose? his dignity?
over a simple, inquisitive question?
“and now before we go on a twenty minute break, it’s time to introduce yourself to the person sitting close to you”
...
why do college professors have to do this?
wonpil bites his lip, at this point in time he’s a senior who’s fed up with ice breakers like this. if it were any other person sitting next to him, in front of him, behind him— he would just go with his usual introduction
“hi i’m kim wonpil, studying psychology and i graduate in the spring. i’m taking this class for a major requirement”
then go about his merry way.
but with her? she and him have history
sort of, and it’s the kind of history that is recent and wonpil is unsure if she is even aware of the weird string of fate-like connection they have
or, wonpil, hear your consciousness out
it’s not a big deal, and in the scenario she doesn’t remember she fell asleep on the bus on another person
then you can just say hi like usual, and cut the string of fate there and then
(but does wonpil really want that?)
“hi”
oh crap she’s started it
wonpil braces himself for whatever outcome this interaction comes out to. he’ll let her speak, and tailor his response from there
“i’m sorry, this might be really weird but that’s your sweater, right?”
so she didn’t give her name, her major, anything substantial about herself but instead shoots wonpil a question
pointing at the sweater that’s draped on the seat in front of wonpil
wonpil doesn’t even check to look. he gulps, nods his head and squeaks, “yeah… why?”
something in her eyes flash by, almost like a glint of recognition
she puts a hand on her mouth, and wonpil can make out the faintest shade of pink blushing its way to her ears
it’s kinda cute
“did someone happen to… fall asleep on you on the bus coming to campus today?”
“... yes?”
“that was me” she buries her face even further into her hands, almost lowering down to the chair
wonpil thought she was gonna fall for some reason so he had to remedy the situation somewhat
“i.. i, um, did you have a good nap?”
great comeback
wonpil was so ready to leave the auditorium and never come back after the break
but he hears her giggle, and slowly come out of her shyness
and it’s a sweet sight, to finally see the way her cheeks look full of embarrassed laughter
as she twirls around a length of hair nervously
and taps the pen on the surface of her desk repeatedly
it was endearing, and wonpil forgets about why he was panicking in the first place
she then explains that she had work the whole day, and only had an hour to rest up before going to this 7pm class
wonpil listens intently, watching her mannerisms and the lilt in her voice when she continues to apologize for falling asleep on him without realizing it
“i’m not usually a deep sleeper, but work was exceptionally tiring today and i just needed at least a bit of shut eye” wonpil nods understandingly, almost worried about her health
“where do you work if you don’t mind me asking?”
“at the coffee shop a few blocks away from campus,” she answers, head tilting to the side “i’m still wearing my uniform for it… is it too obvious?”
wonpil didn’t even realize her black long sleeves was a cafe uniform
but it did explain her strong coffee smell
“something like that,” wonpil decided to say, curling his lips upward, feeling content and relieved at the turnout of events
for the 20 minute break, wonpil thought they’d reconcile over what transpired between them and mind their own business soon enough— even if he thinks it’s hard to do that now knowing something about her
which intrigues wonpil
and, quite frankly, he’d like to talk to her more
just so he has an excuse to watch her emotions paint her face beautifully
but there was a pause right after their short conversation
and in real Awkward Wonpil Fashion, he shows her the 30 page reading material, in all of its flimsy glory and starts asking questions about it
“so uh did you read the whole thing? i thought it was interesting up until the part that i dozed off”
and wonpil got his wish; he sees her eyes shine in surprise at his sudden attempt of an intellectual discussion
but she doesn’t deter him away
and actually, she’s read the whole damn thing. and wonpil was beyond amazed at the level of detail she explains to him about the parts he didn’t understand
he actually starts typing real notes while she was talking
this made her laugh in between her explanations, and wonpil didn’t understand what was so funny about
the fight or flight response
“it’s just. the way you’re typing this down so seriously, i’m sure the prof can explain it better”
wonpil shakes his head no, shakes it so much it hurt his temples
she laughs again, and he likes hearing that sound
“do you want to see what i’ve typed the past hour and a half of this class?’
“bet :p”
“actually nevermind” flashbacks of dsfkjsdjffdslkg ring true in wonpil’s mind as he quickly backspaces the nonsense in his notes
and the conversation continues from more psychology talks, to figuring out they’re in the same major but she’s a recent transfer student from last year
and had been juggling work and school since the start of her senior year
wonpil wonders why he hasn’t seen her in the coffee shop yet
he would have done a double take the first time meeting her there for sure
“oh you’re too kind,” she suddenly replies???
wonpil had said his thoughts out loud
without further embarrassing him, she says that she had only started working there since it’s more convenient for her; wonpil feels grateful she doesn’t dwell on the compliment any longer
alas, the break finishes and the droll of the professor’s voice reverberates throughout the room
this time, though, wonpil definitely feels more alert (awake enthusiastic) as the two of them exchange little comments about the class material
and before you know it, class is over and wonpil is an excited bunny. since they’re by the door they got to leave before everyone else
wonpil thinks it’s time to part ways… but this time they’re not fully strangers at all. they’re taking the same class, same major, they even know each other’s name.
surely this isn’t the last time, right?
“hey, wonpil…” he didn’t even realize that they have started walking towards the bus stop together
“hm?”
“i think i owe you one,” she starts, stopping her tracks to face him. eyebrows up in hesitation, wonpil waits for her to finish
“you know, for taking over your personal space for my own comfort”
“oh that? haha that’s nothing :)” honestly if wonpil can do it again he’d volunteer in a heartbeat
“no, really. let me make it up to you. coffee? on me? i make a mean cappuccino” she winks
it strikes through wonpil’s heart
no need for resuscitation.. yet
“or a matcha latte? whatever you’d like it’ll be on me”
“anything!” wonpil exclaims, suddenly realizing the offer being given to him, the excitement bubbling up inside him again. “i mean, anything you’d like to have me try. surprise me,” he corrects himself
that manages to have her grin widely, eyes twinkling in excitement similar to wonpil’s and he thinks
they can get along
they can get to know each other better this way
“would you be up to go for one now?”
“oh— oh! now?”
“yeah, that way none of us takes the risk of falling asleep back on the bus hehe”
well, he really wouldn’t mind that happening a second time
“really now, wonpil?”
andddd he exposed himself again
it’s fine, she tugs his hand slightly to lead him to the bus that has arrived and wonpil follows in a daze
it’s a little full, so they have no other choice but to stand and hold onto the railings above
“guess no falling asleep here…” she teases, and now wonpil can’t use his hands to hide his blushing face
but the feeling of her just close by
and the scent of coffee lingering in the air
in between them
just inches away from each other
it’ll do for now
#day6 imagines#day6 scenarios#day6 au#kim wonpil scenarios#kim wonpil imagines#kim wonpil x reader#day6 fic#dot series#by:jiae
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Can I have Finn's other persona, the Prince, headcanons, please? 👉🏻👈🏻
I feel like I need to warn here. Prince isn’t really... the hearts and flowers guy. So, I apologize in advance. I touched on a lot of these in the other post I did for him, but honestly, there was a little more I could’ve done, so yes, yes, gladly. I’ll do this. I love this particular character, btw. Even though he’s a raging damn asshole for the most part. Or maybe that’s why I love it? Idk.. anyway, thank you for sending me these and I’m so so so sorry it took a thousand years to get them posted.
Warnings:
uhh.. Kids under 18, go the entire fuck outside, please, I beg of you. I’m saying this out of love/respect for you guys.... Because I like to try and do these as honestly and true to canon/character in kayfabe as I can and yeah... Prince can be ... one hell of a guy. I don’t really know how out of pocket this is liable to get, tbh. I’ll trigger/squick tag everything I think might be bothersome before I post this.
wax play, body fluids, aggressive sex, biting, public sex, rope play, hot and cold play, sensory deprivation, knife play are all the tw’s i have for you all, tbh.
Tagging:
@kyleoreillysknee
@rampagewriting
@writertoo18
@thatnerdwriter
@wrestlingismyguiltypleasure
@chasingeverybreakingwave
@waywardwrestlewritingwaif
@sassymox
@champbucks
@hungmanhorsecarriage
@wardl0w
@ryantaylorgirl
@wrestlingthot
@hotyeehawman
@darbysallin
@gabbynorth98
@bec0m
Other Stuff:
[ ABOUT MY WRITING | MASTERLIST | TAG LIST DOC ]
Okay, first of all.. If I haven’t emphasized this enough already in my previous Prinxe post, what you need to decide before getting involved in any way, shape or form... Is how far are you really willing to go. Because the sex is bomb as fuck a++++++ and all the gold stars, but... Prinxe is a bit of, no.. He can be a huge asshole. He wouldn’t be him if he weren’t. And he’s very entitled. Prideful. So if you two were to argue, and you sit around waiting on him to apologize? Keep waiting. Because that’s all that’s gonna happen. If you can deal with all this shit then cool. Go for it, do you and be happy.
IDK if I touched on this in the other post but.. The man is a masochist. He absolutely gets off on pain. The harder you can tug his hair, the harder you can choke him, the harder you bite down on those very kissable lips... The more he’s going to get off.
-- On this note.. Do not, by any stretch, expect him to go easy on you or treat you like a piece of fine china, because what you do to him will be done back to you. If you’re not into inflicting or receiving pain, it’s best to stay far away from the guy.
The more dangerous something sounds, the more he gravitates towards it. This is not always a good thing, either. It’s really not.
I mentioned before that he has a humiliation kink. And he won’t stop until you’re honest to god on the verge of tears. To begin with, the man has himself a razor tongue and cold iron wit... adding the fact that he gets off on using words to hurt/embarass others? Yikes.
I mentioned shibari in the last one. His favorite thing to do while he’s got you all tied up and straining against the ropes -he’ll demand you squirm and move for him btw, because the biggest part of being into shibari/the act of rope play for him is the fact that you’re right there and you can’t get away until he lets you, .. Anyway, where was I? He really likes to take this knife with a delicate thin and cold blade... And trail it over your body. Cutting away your clothes, because let’s face it, you’re not going to have a stitch to wear when you’re with him. You’re going to be naked and ready to go at any time. So.. Knifeplay is another kink I can kinda see Prinxe having. No, he wouldn’t intentionally hurt you on purpose. But really, you need to ask yourself if you trust the guy enough to be anywhere near you with a knife. Or ropes. Or hot wax..
Very into hot cold play. Loves to drip hot candle wax on your naked body.
Doesn’t bother to hide the screen when you two are having a hot and heavy and filthy cam session while he’s on the road. So.. if you’re not into god knows who seeing you in various states of undress and near feral horniness, then it won’t bother you. But if you believe that private things need to stay private, you’re not going to like this about the guy at all.
Loves to grab hold of your jaw when you’re about to swallow his load and smirk in satisfaction. Nothing gets him off more than when he watches his sexual partner swallow and taste him.
-- Has made you taste yourself for him. The way you whimpered and moaned and groaned had him coming in seconds if I’m being honest.
-- The more vocal you are when giving him a blow job or when he’s pounding you, the harder it’s going to be to keep him from utterly wrecking you or controlling his own orgasm because there’s something about your little noises that make him dangerously close to getting off every time you make them. And bet your ass, he does literally everything he can to keep you noisy, no matter the situation. Even if it’s a public setting. He doesn’t care.
Anybody whose with him needs to have a very broad and open mind, because Prinxe here is constantly evolving in kinks and things he wants to try out on you. And he’s not the kind of guy who wants to have you talked into whatever it is he wants to do wit hyou either. Nothing would make him lose interest faster if we’re being honest. He’s pretty much just ghosted people for far less. So if your mind is closed, probably best to steer clear.
Prinxe is into men and women. If he finds you desirable, he’s going to pursue you. In his own way, of course. Just... Whether you’re a man or a woman, please remember.. This guy is very good at pouring on the charm and seeming like a legit perfect guy. Know that he has many, many faults. Some worse than others. Know what you’re in for and know your limitations. Be firm with him.
-- On that note... a lesser known thing about our boy here... he is totally into his partner being dominant af too. He absolutely loves the power struggle. He tends to win most of the time, but whew.. is it ever one hell of a time during the whole chase / power struggle.
The man has a huge spanking kink. Getting and giving. Only rarely does the getting part of it get indulged though because Prinxe is not the type to easily hand over the dominant role in bed because that means he’s at your mercy and nope.. That is not him. He cannot stand relinquishing control. At all.
-- This goes without saying, it has happened. But it’s very very rare. So don’t expect it. And if you do, either go elsewhere or lower your expectations.
The man does NOT like condoms. At all. That said, this is one of few things he will concede on. If you want him to wear one, he will. He’s also a stickler for safewords. He’s not the best at aftercare, but.. On occasion, he does attempt it. Only if he’s reasonably serious about someone. And that’s not often either because to be honest, in his mind, it’s Prinxe Devitt’s show and we’re all just living in it.
Lowkey, he’d love it if he met just one person who could meet his difficult nature, have a glowing and shiny spine to stand against it and just dominante the fuck out of him. He’d die before admitting it, but he’d love just one time to have someone turn the tables on him.
-- if you were to do that, he’d be a begging and whimpering, overstimulated mess in your mercy.
-- It’s not quite clear how one would go about doing that though, so good luck figuring it out.
Very into sensory deprivation. Loves to edge you until you’re crying and begging and squirming at his every touch. But very into sensory deprivation. Total sensory deprivation. He’ll blindfold you, gag you, tie you up and tease you until you’re at your brink.
-- secretly wants to have it done to him because holy shit, he’d love that. he’d never admit it, as I said, but yeah.
#prince devitt#prince devitt fanfiction#prince devitt imagine#prince devitt headcanons - ns(fw)#prince devitt imagines#prince devitt fanfic#my writing; prince devitt#my fics; prince devitt#my headcanons/nsfw; prince devitt#my headcanons; prince devitt
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Chibnall, Children, Choice and Consequence
Allow me to introduce a companion piece to A Treatise on the Doctor:
It's pretty simple:
Chibnall knows what he's doing and is playing a long game to show how the Doctor needs to take more responsibility.
Let me start off with my favorite examples. That's right, plural.
Every single villain 13 faces is never defeated, merely pushed away from causing them any immediate problems. Tim Shaw being the prime example.
1&10. Seriously, Tim Shaw. Her plan was to use his own bombs on him and then teleport him off the planet. Even without Ranskoor Av Kolos, the Doctor should have thought to check in on him. Especially after The Ghost Monument showed the Stenza were a greater threat than she knew. She still hasn't even checked up on WHAT THE HELL THE STENZA ARE! They sound worse than Daleks but naw, let's go rain-bathing in the upper tropics of Canstano instead.
2. Ghost Monument. We saw the END of an interuniversal race. What the fuck is the beginning that got them there? Who is Illyn and how and why did he orchestrate a super race?
3. Krasko. Sent back in time. Really, Doc? Not gonna take a look at the device and see where Ryan sent the prick so you can double check that he's not gonna cause anymore damage?
4. President Trump analog. Ooooo, you looked at him menacingly, Doc, that'll show him!! Not like he's gonna KEEP DOING ILLEGAL SHIT LIKE THIS.
5. The Pting. She literally shunted it off ship to be dealt with by someone else BUT DOESN'T GO BACK TO BE THAT SOMEONE ELSE ONCE SHE HAS HER TARDIS. That's like leaving a living nuke floating around after sweeping it under the rug while you fly off to Paris.
6. The Pakistani-Indian conflict still happens and millions still die. Not her fault but still....
7. Kerblam. Sure, Charlie's terrorism was solved but not the underlying problem that led to it. Humans still can't work because corporations like profits over people.
8. Similar to the Punjab, how you gonna solve sexism, classism and all the -isms?
9. WHY WAS THE SOLITRACT THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE??!! It's been around since before the universe. Why'd it decide to come back now? It's a whole universe trying to hug our universe to death. Maaaaaaybe we should check out why.
11. She's gets a pass on the Dalek. Fucking impossible to eradicate them.
12. The Master!!! Finally she checks up on something after the adventures... and it's horrible. With everything gone to shit in her absence. Seeing a pattern yet?
And Barton? And the Cassaven? They didn't disappear into smoke.
13. Multiple Earths being multiply fucked. Remember when I said the Doctor couldn't solve racism, classism, sexism, or any of the other -isms? Starting to look like she needs to TRY.
14. The Skithra FLY OFF after getting hit by a laser beam. That kind of thing tends to piss people off. Even if they're idiots using other's technology.
15. Jack. The Judoon. The Ruth Doctor. All things I'd start checking out if I had a time machine BUT
16. WE CAN'T cause the TARDIS emergency alert is going off and we need to hurry up and run and solve this problem before we run out of time in our TIME AND SPACE MACHINE. Leading to another problem the Doctor could help solve but won't. Plastic and over-consumption.
17. Oh yeah, let's trap two Eternals from another universe in the same place. There's NO WAY that could ever turn out bad.
18,19,20. And again. Cyberium. Pushed off Shelley onto herself and onto Ashad and onto The Master.
That's almost 20 "enemies" the Doctor still needs to deal with.
Oh, not to mention that they let UNIT go defunct because they didn't have the forethought to ask if they needed any money in their alien fighting budget. After asking for an office, a desk, and a job. Kinda funny that way, aren't they?
I hope by now you've gotten the idea that this is VERY deliberate. This is Chibnall laying down some very heavy pipe to smack the Doctor like a clothesline. There isn't a one of these situations that can't come around to bite her in the ass.
Barton, Roberts, Skithra. These are all very loose strands for a time traveller like the Doctor to get tripped up on. Chibnall's past episodes prove it. They're all about the Doctor learning how to take responsibility.
42: The Doctor almost gets Martha killed and almost gets himself killed trying to fix it.
The Hungry Earth: The Doctor (a thousand year old "adult") tells Elliot (a 10 year old kid) that "Sure it's totally fine to go get your headphones while we prepare for an approaching unknown alien force." And 11 rightfully gets his ass chewed for it by the child's mother when the kid goes missing because OF COURSE THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS, JACKASS!
Cold Blood: I could write an entire essay about the Doctor's guilt over the Silurian/Human conflicts they've witnessed, but I don't need to. Because every single Silurian centered episode written in the new era is from Chris Chibnall. And you can feel the sad knowledge of Classic Who spill through. He KNOWS how many times the Doctor has fucked up with the Silurians (about 8 times in television format. And it's rough everytime. Rough.) and he writes those episodes like an apology on behalf of the whole human race. And the Doctor. You know why people are put off by Warriors of the Deep? 5 releases a gas that melts the Silurians. And though it's cheesy, the idea and execution is still horrible.
Add to that if the Doctor hadn't stopped to check the crack, then Rory wouldn't have waited and been around to be shot then absorbed by the time crack.
Power of Three: An entire episode about how the Doctor has a problem slowing down and really taking account of the lives of their companions.
Dinosaurs on a Spaceship: The Doctor actually tries to be responsible and pick the right people for a job. For once. But gets angry when they realize it's too late and there's another bunch of Silurians they failed to save. Classic!
Like I said, if you can't see the pattern, you're not paying enough attention to your responsibilites.
Which leads me to the why.
When you fly around time and space for thousands of years, you develop a few duties of care along the way. In every situation, you're the oldest. Technically the only adult in terms of experience. You have a responsibility to act a little less rude and be a bit more aware than needing cue cards to tell you that you should be sad about things around you. And that's the purpose of 13. She's unlucky but learning. Like 12 telling himself something with his face he couldn't say out loud, 13's instincts are leading her to a new place for the Doctor: being a caring, responsible person. Not so much laughing hard or running fast, but being kind. It's the one thing they recognized as a problem in themselves when seeing 1. Being a Doctor is about being kinder than that. Just because you HAVE to saw someone's leg off, that doesn't mean you can't wait a little and comfort them before you do it.
You wanna know what gave me every faith in Chibnall showrunning Doctor Who? 13 staying for Grace's funeral.
Do you understand how unprecedented that is? This is the same person who never said Goodbye to Jo Grant as she got married and fucked off into the night. The same Doctor who said, "I don't do domestic.", did it with Rose a regeneration later, and then closed himself off to everyone but a married couple he felt guilty about who ended up birthing his wife. Have you any idea the number of funerals the Doctor should have the common decency to sit through? This many.
youtube
So for 13 to stay around for the death of a woman she has only just met and not only that, BUT call out Ryan's father for not doing the same, it shows tremendous character growth. It's taken millennia but they're still changing.
Something similar happens with Rosa and The Witchfinders. Realizing that there a lot of companions who have been in situations that are sometimes worse than aliens, but they still manage to make it through. So she needs to buck it up and persevere for everyone else.
That's where her anger comes from, and really it's one of my favorite traits on her. It reminds me of 7. Someone impossibly old and impossibly kind saying to hell with it and at least having some fun with the evils who drag us through the universe. And just like Cartmel planned for 7, 13's past will come to haunt her.
That's where children come in. Most of us are crying babies to the Doctor.
There's this thing you notice most in British shows about answering the question directly as asked. Someone says "Are you sure?", you answer "Sure". That's a direct acknowledgement that you heard the question, understood it, and processed it enough to respond in a manner directly correlating to the question asked. Yas and Graham got it and said "Sure" but Ryan missed it and said "Deffo". This is like Elliot with the headphones. The Doctor should have immediately been like, "Okay, Ryan, it's obvious that you're still dealing with the trauma of your grandmother's death and probably not processing things on a logical level. I said "Are you sure?" Not "Are you deffo?" Because we are most definitely not deffo, Ryan. Graham, you wanna help here?"
I'm being sarcastic for points sake but you understand the idea. The Doctor knows better and has a responsibility as such. She should've really sat down with Ryan and Graham and seen if there was a better way to process their grief.
Because I'm fairly certain that "Deffo" is gonna lead to Ryan's death and Graham's cancer resurging as time cancer (I don't know what time cancer is. I just know it's bad.)
And that is gonna piss Yas off. Which will give you all that character you think she's missing (she isn't. Her character is in her subtleties and silences.). That's WHY her character is a police officer (like how does no else see that the man who wrote Broadchurch wrote an inspector character companion?) Imagine you're Yaz and you see the Doctor flying around in a big, magic box that says POLICE. As a fellow officer, you're gonna expect some basic safety protocols.
Like do a background check on everyone flying in the TARDIS to know whether they're stable enough (mentally, physically, emotionally) for time and space travel. It's no picnic. These people are going to go through hell. A little vetting and planning like Time Heist or Dinosaurs on a Spaceship goes a long way.
Secondly, full fucking disclosure.
"Oh. I can't die because I change my body. Oh. I have arch enemies that will try to kill and torture us any chance they get. Oh. My home planet is full of the biggest assholes in the universe and I'm including my arch enemies."
Third, police like to do this thing called "check-ups" where they go back to the scene of the crime in order to see if there is any more information that can be gleaned which you might not notice when you are busy running around trying not to be killed... Like, the Doctor has the perfect machine to do this with, but nope. Adventure done, run to the next place!!
These are all things you'd expect any reasonable person to do and say when taking others flying off into time and space and "helping". Even if they are an idiot passing through and learning. Especially when you consider the Doctor is vastly older and more experienced than everyone they encounter. They SHOULD know better. And they've got the lifespan to slow down. It's not like they need to be in a hurry because they're going to die at any moment like humans. The Doctor could easily stay for tea and it would be less than a drop in their lifespan.
Now, as usually is the case when I make these theories, I have a parts 1,2,3,4 and 6. There's allways this 5th piece I miss but I manage to get at the end.
But the 6th piece is the Timeless Child. The Doctor isn't a Time Lord anymore. They're not beholden to those people and ideas anymore. Even moreso, those people basically raped her childhood for their own gain so it's not like you'd really listen to them and their "policy of non-intervention".
I'm sensing a coming Trial of a Time Lord season (even believing these two seasons are the opening statement and preliminary evidence of the trial itself) wherein the Doctor finally gets the turnaround 6 deserved. A Trial of the Time Lords, if you will.
"In all my travels through time and space I have battled against evil, against power-mad conspirators. I should have stayed here! The oldest civilization: decadent, degenerate and rotten to the core! Power mad conspirators? Daleks, Sontarans, Cybermen — they're still in the nursery compared to us! Ten million years of absolute power: that's what it takes to be really corrupt!"
This is what it's all coming down to. Chibnall's takedown of the Time Lords. And The Master is going to play the most crucial role of all.
They're going to be revealed as an Ux alongside the Doctor and show how the only constants they have in this universe are each other and it's about damn time they work together and tell these high collars to eat Schitt while they explore every star and planet they can find.
Come on, the episode is called The Timeless "Children". If it was just the Doctor it'd be called "The Timeless Child". The Master says as much with the misdirect line, "built on the lie of the Timeless Child." since we see two kids playing in that flashback.
"Since always. Since the Cloister Wars, since the night he stole the moon and the president's wife, since he was a little girl. One of those was a lie, can you guess which one?"
Now we know which one was a lie, we know the Master HAS known the Doctor since they were a little girl. THAT little girl...
But this is all just speculation. It's not like Chris Chibnall could have been thinking about this for the past 40 years and was given a blank slate to do whatever he wanted for five years on his favorite TV show. If y'all want to think he took those reigns and is choosing to make things worse...
Well then you don't know much about responsibility.
I'll let the man himself tell you about it.
"Very early in my career,” says Chibnall, “someone told me that you learn more from a failure than you do from a success. And then I lived out that phrase for a year in Los Angeles. I learned that I would not work that way again or be put in that situation again.” The essential lesson was: “You either have to be in total control of a show or working with people who share your vision and will work with you to achieve it. Also, never work with 13 executive producers.
“Camelot was the classic case of too many cooks. It wasn’t a harmonious set-up and I think that does manifest itself on screen.
“I had a fantastic cast but you have to be free to tell the story you want to tell in the way that you want to tell it. What ended up on screen was not what I wanted and so it is a blemish on my CV.”
Credit to @thirteenthdoc
“You immortals - so entitled, so spoiled. You never clear up after yourselves and you always leave stuff lying around.” - Thirteenth Doctor in Can You Hear Me?
#doctor who#bbc#13th doctor#thirteen x yasmin#yasmin khan#ryan sinclair#grace o'brien#graham o'brien#the Doctor#the master#missy#chris chibnall#time lords#gallifrey#tardis#jodie whittaker#mandip gil#tosin cole#bradley walsh#michelle gomez#peter capaldi#sacha dhawan#john simm#david tennant#matt smith#11th doctor#10th doctor#Youtube
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Hey y’all, I know it’s only been maybe 2 weeks since I really posted something? I think…I dunno, I lose track of it sometimes, but I wanted to say I’m still here, but just taking a small break. I feel like when I don’t post it seems like I’m drifting away lol, but I’m not. I’m just a bit fried at the moment. I’ve been busy with family events all summer, SO many birthday parties…having a big family is both a blessing and a curse.
But after being able to write consistently for about 7-8 months, where I could open up a doc and literally write a thousand words, I was finally starting to feel writers block again. I just kind of woke up like maybe a little less than a month ago and could not write at all, besides doing a little editing on already existing chapters of the stories I am working on. So I decided to clear my head by taking a tiny break and stepping back and looking at my stories to see where they are headed.
I am currently editing a Buckley siblings fic that will be chapters long, although not yet posted, and I suddenly got another idea for Madney, a Vegas AU which has sparked my creativity back a bit, but for now I’m focusing on those two and maybe another story because that is what is calling to me right now. But I’ll get working on my other stories soon, when I find the time and I’m not so drained. It’s been hard also finding time to write, mainly because I’m now taking care of my cousin full time while my aunt and uncle work, and on top of that I start dance soon which tires me out as well.
Okay I should cut it here now lol, but I just wanted to let people who may follow my 9-1-1 stories know what’s been happening in case anyone is waiting for an update. ❤️
#911#911 on fox#911 fox#madney#maddie buckley#chimney han#the buckley siblings#writers block is a curse#but to be honest I think me not being able to write#has to do with me being so busy and always on the go#this summer#things should settle down once school starts for my siblings and cousins
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