i don't know what addict needs to here this but, you have time to get yourself together. you don't have to have all the answers right now. whether you're just trying to survive or trying to recover, those are both things that are a process. if you're still here, there's still something that can be done - now or in the future - to make your life better.

it is true that addiction takes lives - many lives. but many more also survive, many still recover - even the people whose lives were at imminent risk every day, many of them found they had so much more time than they thought they did... and found ways to use that time to become healthier and happier, even if they still actively use (ex: harm reduction and community support!)

you are not doomed. you don't need to be fixed; you aren't broken. you just need to be alive and take care of yourself as much as possible, given the support, resources, and knowledge you have. that's all you can do.

Heroin, Mixed Media and Colored Pencils on Wood, 2022

Alright. Willis Todd being an abusive father to Jason is a trope often utilized. Comparing this version of him to Bruce's reactions to Red Hood is fantastic. Lots to analyze there.

However, I raise you. There needs to be more fanwork addressing the classism behind Willis Todd being characterized as an abusive alcoholic. In some version of canon, Willis Todd was a good dad in a shitty situation. He was poor, his wife (Catherine) was sick, and he had a newborn baby he needed to provide for. In this horrid situation, where he has no family to fall back on and no higher education to obtain a decent well-paying job, he tries to get quick money. He's desperate to keep both his wife and son alive.

Catherine turns to drugs because it's easier and cheaper to buy drugs than healthcare. The pain she experiences is debilitating, and she'd do anything to not feel pain for one godsdamned second. Unfortunately, this turns into an addiction.

This ultimately shapes the way that Jason views crime. Bruce, while he may be sympathetic to individuals who resort to crime to pay their bills, will not understand huddling in Crime Alley in the dead of winter as he debates whether to buy food or pay for heating. He won't understand the bitterness, hatred, pain, and resignation of never having enough money to survive as you get chewed up again and again.

If Jason's dad is just an abusive criminal, that not only perpetuates the notion that all criminals are evil, but it will shape how Jason views those who commit crime. Breaking the law doesn't make someone bad. There's plenty of reasons people commit crime, whether to survive, protect someone, or something else. The issue, especially in Gotham, is the system that perpetuates wealth inequality through bribes and unethical governmental practices.

Anyway, I think Jason's Red Hood is more fleshed out if it accounts for him acknowledging the desperation behind goons and small-time criminals because he grew up without other options.

Shows from the 60s/70s will always consist of the main characters going through the most insane, life-changing, traumatising experience and then having a shot of them all laughing together at the end and proceeding to never speak of it ever again

There’s a line from American Gods I keep coming back to in relation to Yellowjackets, an observation made early on by Shadow in prison: “The kind of behavior that works in a specialized environment, such as prison, can fail to work and in fact become harmful when used outside such an environment.” I keep rotating it in my head in thinking about the six survivors, the roles they occupy in the wilderness, and the way the show depicts them as adults in society.

Because in the wilderness, as in prison, they’re trapped—they’re suffering, they’re traumatized, they’re terrified—but they’re also able to construct very specific boxes to live in. And, in a way, that might make it easier. Cut away the fat, narrow the story down to its base arc. You are no longer the complex young woman who weighs a moral compass before acting. You no longer have the luxury of asking questions. You are a survivor. You have only to get to the next day.

Shauna: the scribe. Lottie: the prophet. Van: the acolyte. Taissa: the skeptic. Misty: the knight. Natalie: the queen. Neat, orderly, the bricks of a new kind of society. And it works in the woods; we know this because these six survive. (Add Travis: the hunter, while you’re at it, because he does make it to adulthood).

But then they’re rescued. And it’s not just lost purpose and PTSD they’re dealing with now, but a loss of that intrinsic identity each built in the woods. How do you go home again? How do you rejoin a so-called civilized world, where all the violence is restricted to a soccer field, to an argument, to your own nightmares?

How does the scribe, the one who wrote it all out in black and white to make sense of the horrors, cope with a world that would actively reject her story? She locks that story away. But she can’t stop turning it over in her head. She can’t forget the details. They’re waiting around every corner. In the husband beside her in bed. In the child she can’t connect with across the table. In the best friend whose parents draw her in, make her the object of their grief, the friend who lives on in every corner of their hometown. She can’t forget, so she tries so hard to write a different kind of story instead, to fool everyone into seeing the soft maternal mask and not the butcher beneath, and she winds up with blood on her hands just the same.

How does the prophet come back from the religion a desperate group made of her, a group that took her tortured visions, her slipping mental health, and built a hungry need around the very things whittling her down? She builds over the bones. She creates a place out of all that well-intended damage, and she tells herself she’s helping, she’s saving them, she has to save them, because the world is greedy and needs a leader, needs a martyr, needs someone to stand up tall and reassure everyone at the end of the day that they know what’s best. The world, any world, needs someone who will take those blows so the innocent don’t have to. She’s haunted by everyone she didn’t save, by the godhood assigned to her out of misplaced damage, and when the darkness comes knocking again, there is nothing else to do but repeat old rhymes until there is blood on her hands just the same.

How does the acolyte return to a world that cares nothing for the faith of the desperate, the faith that did nothing to save most of her friends, that indeed pushed her to destroy? She runs from it. She dives into things that are safe to believe in, things that rescue lonely girls from rough home lives, things that show a young queer kid there’s still sunshine out there somewhere. She delves into fiction, makes a home inside old stories to which she already knows the endings, coaxes herself away from the belief that damned her and into a cinemascope safety net where the real stuff never has to get in. She teaches herself surface-level interests, she avoids anything she might believe in too deeply, and still she’s dragged back to the place where blood winds up on her hands just the same.

How does the skeptic make peace with the things she knows happened, the things that she did even without meaning to, without realizing? She buries them. She leans hard into a refusal to believe those skeletons could ever crawl back out of the graves she stuffed them into, because belief is in some ways the opposite of control. She doesn’t talk to her wife. She doesn’t talk to anyone. It’s not about what’s underneath the surface, because that’s just a mess, so instead she actively discounts the girl she became in the woods. She makes something new, something rational and orderly, someone who can’t fail. She polishes the picture to a shine, and she stands up straight, the model achievement. She goes about her original plan like it was always going to be that way, and she winds up with blood on her hands just the same.

How does the knight exist in a world with no one to serve, no one to protect, no reason propelling the devastating choices she had grown comfortable making? She rechannels it. She convinces herself she’s the smartest person in the room, the most capable, the most observant. She convinces herself other people’s mysteries are hers to solve, that she is helping in every single action she takes. She makes a career out of assisting the most fragile, the most helpless souls she can find, and she makes a hobby out of patrolling for crimes to solve, and when a chance comes to strap her armor back on and ride into battle, she rejoices in the return to normalcy. She craves that station as someone needed, someone to rely upon in the darkest of hours, and she winds up with blood on her hands because, in a way, she never left the wilderness at all.

How does the queen keep going without a queendom, without a pack, without people to lead past the horrors of tomorrow? She doesn’t. She simply does not know how. She scrounges for something, anything, that will make her feel connected to the world the way that team did. She moves in and out of a world that rejects trauma, punishes the traumatized, heckles the grieving as a spectacle. She finds comfort in the cohesive ritual of rehabilitation, this place where she gets so close to finding herself again, only to stumble when she opens her eyes and sees she’s alone. All those months feeding and guiding and gripping fast to the fight of making it to another day, and she no longer knows how to rest. How to let go without falling. She no longer wears a crown, and she never wanted it in the first place, so how on earth does she survive a world that doesn’t understand the guilt and shame of being made the centerpiece of a specialized environment you can never explain to anyone else? How, how, how do you survive without winding up with blood on your hands just the same?

All six of these girls found, for better or worse, a place in the woods. All six of them found, for better or worse, a reason to get up the next day. For each other. And then they go home, and even if they all stayed close, stayed friends, it’d still be like stepping out of chains for the first time in years. Where do you go? How do you make small choices when every decision for months was life or death? How do you keep the part of yourself stitched so innately into your survival in a world that would scream to see it? How do you do away with the survivor and still keep going?

They brought it back with them. Of course they did. It was the only way.

Prompt 116

Give Battinson robins but it’s DCxDP style with ghosts. 

His kids are… technically not from his world and technically not alive either, but that doesn’t stop him from adopting them. Even if he wasn’t aware of them being literal ghosts for the first few hours of encountering them. 

How did they get here? Well, you see, sometimes child ghosts will run into each other, and they’ll form their own little friend groups. Or family groups. Especially if they lack a guardian. Who would tell them not to mess with natural portals. 

Or to kidnap a phantom to play with them, but hey he’s enjoying himself too and has a puppy! The bestest boy!

Bruce was not prepared for some sort of energy-thing to open and spit out a good half a dozen children. Nor was he prepared for these children to all have powers, or for another child (thankfully a teen) to fall into the cave a few weeks later. 

GET BACK TO MANKAI DORMS SPEEDRUN

AKA. natsugumi gets stuck in the rain and has to survive w one umbrella 😔 gone wrong

ALT VERS + PFPS UNDER CUT!

FEEL FREE TO USE WITH CREDIT!

Watching ST1 and surprised by just how much Nancy lies. She lies even when she has no reason to, like when she's hanging out with Steve and his friends and wants to leave, she could have easily said something like "I need to do something" or "I'm tired" but she made up some excuse about her mom. When asking Barb's mom about Barb, she could have easily told her she was worried but she didn't. Girl just lies like it's second nature to her.

I absolutely adore how you draw Lucasop truth and inference I’m gonna put you and your art in a blender and also steal gatto

thank u.... t&i lucasop is so funny

i think i’ve learned a lot when it comes to not applying my own values to the media i consume

for my script analysis class yesterday, we discussed two gentleman from verona, and nearly every classmate of mine was up in arms about how sexist the story is.

and i'm not saying it's not, or that it's not infuriating to read. but i'm also not putting my energy into getting upset about something written 500 or so years ago. and i'm not about to put my own beliefs onto these characters that are not me. i'm going to let their choices speak for themselves, and interpret it in the context of the story.

all that said, this now brings me to the point of alastor in episode 5, and how viscerally people are responding to it. those of you up in arms about the choices he’s making, and the violent threat he gave husk, you’re missing the entire point of his character, of this place they’re in, of the story being told. he’s an overlord, and he became an overlord by killing much bigger overlords and broadcasting their deaths over the radio.

HE IS NOT A GOOD PERSON.

if you started this show with the belief that every character working the hotel is a good person, you’re in the wrong place. watch the good place if you’re looking for a good wholesome story about getting dead sinners into heaven, because that’s not what this show is about.

you’re more than welcome to hate him after seeing the way he exerted power over a being whose soul he owns, but you’re doing the media you’re watching a disservice by writing it off so quickly. if you don’t like to be uncomfortable watching media, watch something else. this is an uncomfortable show, it handles uncomfortable topics, and it’s going to be an uncomfortable ride, and if you’re not up for something like that, then you should take a break from it and pick up something else. you don’t have to get online and defend your own ideals while you watch a show that goes against your ideals.

at the end of the day, addicts are just people with an illness. we can run ourselves in circles all day - doing drugs, finding drugs, lying to ourselves and others, digging deeper, spiraling, feeling on top of the world, fighting for our lives. we can do and feel and experience all that, and more.

but at the end of the day, it's just another day lived as a human being. there's nothing exceptional about us. nothing about us that makes us broken or monsters, nothing that means people are better off without us, nothing that means we're failures and doomed. we are just people with an illness, one that's both 'mental' and 'physical.'

our lives are hard, and the people who care about us often struggle beside us. but that doesn't mean every moment we're alive, in active addiction, is a moment wasted. our lives matter just as much as others, and we don't have to have all the answers now. us being alive is good, and there is always joy in this world for us - joy that we can both share and receive.

Since qBad is canonically kidnapped now, I offer you guys some angst that I thought of right before he got teleported back to spawn.

It's Pomme's birthday tomorrow. That's the same day Dapper lost his life so it's a really important day for the both of them. Except now their dad is gone, taken just a few days before and two eggs are sitting together, both worried sick. Pomme is playing "you are my sunshine" on her guitar, not only for herself and her brother but also for her two (or three if Etoiles also disappears before that) missing parents. At the same time, on a boat in the middle of the ocean is a demon. He is still determined to save his friends but he thinks of his kids. He quietly and sadly sings the same song, hoping they will see each other soon and the cookies that he left are enough. It's just another birthday that they spend separated. Just this time the roles are reversed. The kids are the ones sitting in an empty home where normally would be a whole, loving family.

ITS YUKI DAY EVERYONE‼️

The Pyramid Game 🔺

caught up with the live action of Pyramid Game webtoon, 6 episodes in and I'm really liking the adaptation so far!

There are minor changes with new characters but they follow the main plot really well.

I also came across few interesting romantical assumptions for Ja Eun and Ha Rin, I have news for you guys....😂

I have around 15 books pending to re-start reading 🤣😭and i remember where I left off every one of them. And Right now I'm reading palace of illusions!!

literally me rn