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drxwsyni · 4 years

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Petrified (pt. 6)

Yandere Erasermic x f!Reader

SERIES MASTERLIST

a/n: So, I’ve got the rest of this fic planned out which means ideally, writing the rest of it should be easier. I’m so sorry for how long it took me to finish this part, I just had to figure out where I was taking the whole story first. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

A big thank you to those few anons who so kindly sent me some inspiration for this fic. I really appreciate the help, and it greatly assisted me in forming the outline to the rest of the story <3

*Sidenote*: Please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed from the taglist! Also, I’d recommend looking at the warnings listed on Ao3 for the whole fic. There’s a lot of them, and some of you might like the heads up for future chapters (it will have slight spoilers though).

5.2k words

Warnings: Reader experiences panic attacks, severe anxiety & claustrophobia, coercive behaviour

The progression of the night felt slow, but perhaps that wasn’t such a horrible thing―it allowed your mind to grow accustomed to the seemingly endless rambling of a certain blond. That, and you could appreciate the unfaltering patience of his partner, who like you listened dutifully and made the occasional response to whatever the voice hero had chosen to fixate on.

And surprisingly, the frustrating agreement you were quite literally coerced into began slipping from your recollection, at least for the moment.

You’d admit, the two men had some fairly captivating stories. It was becoming a sort of norm for you to idly exist alongside them while they spoke. As a civilian, and one with relatively no past experience when dealing with heroes or villains, you were more or less forced to let them take the reins on the back and forth between the three of you.

That is unless they wanted to talk about what flowers were best paired together, or the step by step process of tending to some particularly high maintenance plants. You assumed they didn’t, and stayed quiet in your ways.

And so time went on, you nestled into the corner of their couch in the small but comfortably furnished living room, the fuel burning fireplace giving off a warmth that settled the nerves that had been sent skyrocketing not too long ago.

For the second time that night, your eyes drifted to the clock hanging on the wall―6:52 pm.

In moments like these you were able to be thankful of Shouta’s perceptiveness, him following your gaze without you realizing his actions. It wasn’t until he voiced his own concerns of not wanting to keep you up too late that you had the realization of his observances.

Naturally, you had no qualms with the idea of your departure.

Hizashi wasn’t as accepting of it, being the overly affectionate person you hated him for, but he would always listen to Shouta before he did so with you. And with a stern glance and brief assurance, his own opinions gave way in favour for the erasure hero’s.

You tried insisting that calling a cab home was no issue, but you rarely got your way with the two, and tonight was not going to be an exception. That reality had you sitting in their car on the way back to your apartment, Hizashi in the driver's seat and still managing to find something to discuss. At this point you weren’t sure if you preferred the nearly deafening silence of Shouta’s company, or the never ending chatter of his partner, but that too was out of your control when you were seen off by the visibly exhausted man at the door just minutes ago, him favouring to remain home to clean up for the night.

The speakers were playing low, some unrecognizable channel broadcasting soft rock while you politely listened to Hizashi drone on as he drove the car through town. It had begun raining just before you left, the distinct but quiet noise of downpour hitting the windshield having a somewhat soothing effect.

It was greatly appreciated, when the sound of Hizashi’s voice was growing in intensity the more excited he became with the topic at hand. You didn’t have the heart to tell him to lower his tone, and so you did your best to contain any brief winces when the pitch raised just above a comfortable level.

When the sight of your apartment complex came into view through the rain splattered glass and street lights reflecting off the droplets, a deep sigh of relief escaped your lungs. Paying attention to the exuberant man after such a long and mentally tasking night was difficult, but somehow you managed to pull it off. You gave yourself some credit for surmounting the task, fully prepared to bound out of the vehicle to your awaiting bedroom the second the chance to do so arose.

The car came to a halt, Hizashi putting the gear shift into park outside the complex. You waited for the doors to unlock, getting ready to say your goodbyes.

You felt a warm hand rest atop your thigh instead, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“Before ya get going, I just want to mention one last time that what you’re doin’ at work really isn’t the best idea, sunshine. I know, I know―you like helping people with that cute lil’ quirk of yours. It’s just the whole thing isn’t treatin’ ya very well, you can’t tell me it’s something you’re really okay with keeping up.”

The leg that wasn’t being held down by the blond’s hand bounced anxiously―the action itself unconscious, and movements small to the point where he didn’t pick up on it. His gaze was hard set on your expression, and the raw concern in his eyes was only unsettling, the exact opposite effect it should have.

Salvation was just a few metres away, but with the car doors still locked, it might as well be in another country.

Your eyes trained on the passing cars at the intersection down the street, plastering the best casual look across your face. Inwardly, you prayed he couldn’t sense the way your heart rate had picked up to a racing pace, and the somewhat unsteadiness to your breathing.

“It’s hard, but the job is all I have. Not just for money, but I really do get satisfaction out of working there. And...while this isn’t really the first time I’ve had issues because of my quirk, I can’t just let it stop me from doing what I love.”

Without even looking at him, you could tell how much he disapproved. And you didn’t need the visual confirmation when the grip on your thigh got tighter, and the noise of breathy exhale sounded off next to you. “Sunshine, you’re only hurtin’ yourself. It’s not worth it to do that over a job.”

For once your eyes met his, only for a moment, with a small and brief surge of what you think may have been confidence. Could’ve been stupidity, either way it had you replying with an edge. “You’re one to talk, don’t people like you get hurt all the time for the sake of your job?”

There was a pause, and in that silence you feared for your life.

But then the blonde gave an amused chuckle, removing the hand from your thigh to wave off your confrontational remark. “It’s different for you, I’m supposed to get hurt if it means I’ll protect someone else. And even then, I’m ready to rock with a little help from my friends. My wounds are healed and then it’s back to business―your aches are long term. And for what? Those pretty flowers are gonna die no matter what ya do, no need to put yourself through it to give them a few more days of air time, honey.”

All you could do was smile, even though the condescending attitude was killing you in more ways than one. To drive your fake expression of positivity home, you mustered that awful customer service voice that you’d summon when having to deal with some less than savoury individuals.

“It’s not that I don’t think you’re right, Hizashi. It’s just...I’m really dedicated to my job, and I have been for a long time. I don’t think we’ll be able to agree on this, but that’s not a big deal.”

He gave you a lasting look, as if trying to find answers that he wouldn’t get from spoken responses. Dismissively, the blond shook his head, unlocking the passenger door. “Alright, alright. I’m not gonna change my mind on this though. And ya better hold up your end of the deal either way. I don’t think Shouta or I could take another scare from you so soon, got it?”

Oh, you heard him loud and clear.

You nodded in agreement, “Of course, thanks for the ride home. Oh―feel free to tell me if you have to cancel any of our plans if something comes up too.” Hurriedly, you were collecting your handbag that was strewn across your lap, reaching for the handle and pushing the heavy door open.

“Sure thing, hun!” Inwardly, you cringed for the thousandth time this night at his unwelcome pet names, giving a final smile before gently shutting the car door.

The sound of rain lightly coming down around you, with the damp heaviness in the air felt like an atmospheric and emotional reset. One that you needed―your pent up anxieties were ready to break through the walls you put up since the second you stepped out of your apartment. And you almost forgot about them too, the feeling of consistent dread becoming something that lingered alongside all your other emotions. It never went away, and it’s not that you stopped noticing it completely, rather you had to push it down to keep up a calm facade.

And now, you didn’t dare glance back in Hizashi’s direction as you made your way to the front entrance of the complex. Because he would see the look on your face, lower lip quivering, eyes watering and expression just barely holding it together.

The distraction of a normal conversation was ripped from your body, and the prospect of having to worry about balancing work as usual without looking like a liar came crashing down on you.

You could only hope that the walls were thick enough for your neighbours to be protected from the sounds of your sobs.

_____

Petals grew with a lively plushness, leaves sprouting a new sense of vitality. It was a beautiful display of plant life.

And you grew tired.

Your most recent purchase of concealer was doing a good job dissuading people from that fact however. Even after a long work day, it remained masking the dark circles underneath your eyes. Nothing changed for a while, except for the notion that you were getting better at keeping the drawbacks of your dedication out of the spotlight.

Arrangement after tedious arrangement, your quirk brought life back into the greenery like it always did. You only wished you felt as healthy as you looked. The sight of a blemish free and lively complexion as a result of your new makeup routine made you a little jealous, knowing the truth.

You never felt so concerned and drained over the reality of your general state before now.

Those two heroes wanted you doing what they thought was best for you, which they had no right to decide. And although you resolved in secret to simply put up a front of agreeableness, their demands still had an effect.

Paranoia was one of them.

Having them walk in on your work shift unannounced was a slim possibility, but it was a possibility nonetheless. Ideally, you would save the fairly high priced makeup for those impending weekend nights spent with the two. Yet, the prospect of either of the heroes catching you off guard, and quite clearly unchanged from holding yourself back, kept you reapplying the product day after day.

You went into the ordeal with high hopes, but with each passing shift your doubts only became more incessant. Going through the motions of what was normally a mindless routine became taxing, even just days after seeing the two. And so, when the time rolled around a week later to give them what was pretty much a progress report passed off as a friendly get together, it was difficult to maintain a straight face.

No amount of astonishingly good food, or engaging stories by the fireplace could take your mind off the question that by all means should pop up.

And it did―merely proving your conceptions of what they really had in mind for nights like these. For some ungodly reason the two sought to control this part of your life, one that if it weren’t for them might not be a big issue. Without the emotional strain, your body would be able to handle the effects of utilizing your quirk in a way that was manageable.

It was their fault you felt as if the end of a work day couldn’t come sooner, and the fumes of energy you retained nearly weren’t enough to get you home each night.

And yet, as they sprung the expected question upon you, demanding to know if you were following through with your end of the ‘agreement,’ they seemed none the wiser to your blatant lies.

Well, aside from the fleeting glance Hizashi sent to Shouta, which was promptly disregarded, you’d effectively averted another crisis. It was back to settling into the background of their company, losing yourself in their words for the moment where the questionable reality of the situation went over your head.

Perhaps if you grew closer to the heroes under normal circumstances, you wouldn’t feel so gut wrenchingly apprehensive whenever you caught yourself coming to greatly enjoy your time with them. It was like an internal betrayal―your body unable to disregard the oppressive behaviour they exhibited, while simultaneously longing to have gratitude for their hospitable nature.

By the end of the night, the semi-forced meeting had you feeling as drained as any work day would, and then some.

In fact, you never fully recovered from it.

You only got worse, the need to apply more concealer and muster everything in your being to force a smile on your face during the day being the bane of your existence. It was all because of them, and they didn’t even know.

If you weren’t so miserable, you could almost laugh at the whole thing. They were the ones urging you to take better care of yourself, and yet it was them who were keeping you from doing so. It’s not like you could just heed their words and stop using your quirk―your livelihood depended on it. Tips were hard to come by in your occupation, and the only reason why you earned so much was due to the advantage you held in the workplace.

The frustration was what had you crying yourself to sleep some nights, at least when you weren’t too exhausted to simply pass out the second your head hit the pillow. You began devising ‘what if’ scenarios that would only have to do with ways to avoid Shouta and Hizashi. Ways to weasel your way out of meeting up with them.

Maybe you could fake being sick? They would just come check up on you regardless.

Perhaps you could move to another city? You didn’t have the funds―and what if they followed you?

Why don’t you just ask them to end the agreement?

...Don’t lie to yourself, you’d rather lose your job than face that level of confrontation.

They were an active nuisance even when they weren’t directly in your life. And so when they were present in that sense, the feeling of unbearable stress only increased tenfold.

Hizashi was one for texting, the sound of a message alert from your phone instinctively triggering your heart to drop in your chest like a Pavlov dog. A painful reminder in the times you managed to free your worrisome mind from their unintentional torment.

And then there was the unannounced visit from Shouta on your way home. It only happened once before the next dinner night, but it was enough to break down the wall you’d built for the ensuing occasion that would hopefully protect your weak heart from shattering under the stress.

He walked you home, catching you on your way back from work. It was peculiar, to say the least. A hero as busy as him actively ignoring his duties to see a civilian who was in no danger whatsoever back to their apartment. You initially questioned him, and he blew off the concern with the defence that this type of occurrence was very much in the rage of heroics that needed to be done.

You weren’t in danger, but you might’ve been if he hadn’t showed up. It was a logical action taken by him, and you shouldn’t worry about it.

Shouta was quiet on his feet, and you might’ve thought he’d left you be if it weren’t for that distinct rustling of his capture weapon shifting as he walked next to you. He was a man of few words, and seeing you home didn’t require much conversation when he was simply doing his duty as a hero.

You arrived at the complex, safe and sound. Physically at least.

As always, you had to adjust from keeping your anxieties to yourself, to being so overwhelmingly aware of them in the privacy of your own apartment. The floodgates were opened, and bottled up emotions no longer had a need to stay hidden. Coming home was never supposed to be so painful, but it was when you were forced to spend it trying to calm down from the chance day.

_____

They let you make dessert for your next meeting. The both of them were deeply impressed by your skills, offering their own extensive words of praise.

Expectedly, it wasn’t enough to have them forgetting the real reason why you were there. You were thankful when Shouta asked how you were doing this time―he always got straight to the point.

But you ended up yawning midway through dismissing their concerns, and of course they pressed you on it. It wasn’t intentional in the slightest. You didn’t want to give away that your limbs felt like they weighed a thousand pounds with how tired you were. Or how your existence could now be chalked up to getting ready for work, going to work, and recovering from work―with a sprinkle of uncontrollable meltdowns on the side.

You told them it was getting late, and they had offered you a drink, so naturally you were a little tired from it. No big deal, right?

Of course, they said.

And so you went home not too long after, Shouta in the driver's seat, stoic and silent as ever. Maybe it was your hazed over mind playing tricks on you, but his demeanour felt...off. Like he wanted to say something, but was holding himself back. Perhaps it was for your sake, or he just assumed you were too worn out to really take whatever words were floating around in his head to heart. So instead he kept a close eye on you the whole way home, stealing concerned glances that you never met with your own gaze. He was tense―the white knuckled grip on the wheel gave it away.

Shouta never gave you evidence as to why he was acting as such, and you never asked him to.

_____

While you may have been growing accustomed to their presence even in the slightest, it didn’t stop your body from shutting down in the areas that you needed most.

Resilience was your strong suit in the time before meeting the two men. But life was testing you around every corner, and you were failing these tests with worse results each time.

It was Wednesday, the halfway mark in another week that felt all too long for you to be able to stomach. Unforeseen obstacles were becoming a norm lately. Making sure you were stocked up on enough caffeine so you didn’t black out, pinching yourself to stay awake in the slower times at work, consciously paying attention simple actions so you didn’t trip over your own two feet. Generally, it was the small stuff that was making your life harder alongside the more glaring issues you faced.

And now, the obstacle was getting home. It’s not that this wasn’t always a task in itself, but it never developed past the routine of ensuring you were heading in the right direction when your mind chose to wander.

This time you were sure the route you were taking was correct, but something was in your way.

Your ears rung at the high pitched sirens going off around you. The flashing lights of firetrucks, ambulances, and other various first responder vehicles lit up the steeped darkness of the night. A crowd had formed at the police tape line blocking off one side of the street, the group effectively taking up any space left to get by on the other side that wasn’t bombarded by emergency personnel.

The sight seemed like an insurmountable feat, especially in your state. Physically and emotionally drained, the gathering of onlookers stood as one of your worst fears and largest challenges yet. Whatever had earned such an audience was beyond you. Realistically, you needed only to regard the response it was given to know that whatever had happened, it was quite serious.

And it was preventing you from moving forward.

There was the shortcut to your left, one that’d worked for you before...until it didn’t. The warnings of Shouta and Hizashi ran through your head, bringing on a new sense of anxiety. It was just what you needed―the words of the two most intimidating men in your life keeping you from seeing yourself home in a calm manner.

You couldn’t take the alleyway. The only option was right in front of you.

Deep breaths.

It was only roughly twenty or thirty feet of crowd. Tightly packed, and relatively unmoving. You didn’t have the heart to rudely shove your way through the condensed gathering, fearing the looks of disapproval from those you tried to get past. And so you weaved through slowly, barely getting out a passing “Pardon me,” or “Excuse me.”

Distantly, you were aware that your voice was so small amongst the muddled conversations of strangers and still blaring sirens, that the probability of anyone hearing your forced politeness was slim to none. But the action made you feel better, even if nobody knew that you were having these concerns. At least you were trying to be wary of others.

But you didn’t get the same care in return.

Rudely, an observing civilian shoved you to the side, selfishly trying to get a better view. You stumbled into another body, earning a curse of annoyance for your clumsiness. With a racing heart hammering in your ears, you gave a distressed apology. It earned you no leniency.

You can block them out, just focus on getting out of here.

Another harsh force collided with your back, sending you to the pavemented ground. The feeling of your knees scraping against the harsh surface didn’t register. The notion that tears were welling in your eyes didn’t either. Only the sensation of panic, and the ability to simply breath becoming more difficult was able to surface in your consciousness.

You pleaded with your body to stand up, and somehow you did, no thanks to anyone around you who could’ve very well assisted you. Through the thickness of the crowd you couldn’t even see where the bodies dissipated. All you could do was blindly move forward.

Nobody cared about how overwhelmed you quite obviously were. Or at least that’s what you thought, not being able to completely tell, or ask for help to hopefully alert someone of your extreme discomfort. They only needed to remove their focus from whatever scene warranted so much attention in front of them for a second to realize what they were unknowingly doing.

And yet, of course nobody was that conscious of their own actions. Not like you, who even amidst the chaos of being shoved in every which direction still desperately tried to minimize your own damage. It was for the sake of those who paid no mind for your own comfort, you fearing whatever might happen if you didn’t.

The presence of so many people was suffocating. If you didn’t think you were claustrophobic before, you certainly knew you were now.

You were exhausted, stressed, partly injured―although that fact still hadn’t set in yet―and unbearably on edge.

And then you were out.

You don’t remember going through the motions, just that now your body wasn’t compressed by countless others. A few seconds went by and you felt your sense of balance come back to you. But you still felt nauseous, and in lifting a hand to your face you realized that you were crying, feeling the distinct wetness against your fingers.

Out of the need for mental self-preservation, your brain essentially forced you into autopilot. You found your legs moving away from the crowd, and down the route that would lead you home. It amazed you by the time you shut the door to your apartment that you hadn’t passed out. The way you still shakily sucked in breaths in quick succession hadn’t stopped, and your hands could barely keep steady as you fumbled with the locks on the door.

The work bag weighing you down was unceremoniously dropped to the floor, and you tiredly trudged to the kitchen table. Had you gone any longer without rest, you could’ve very well collapsed right there on the floor. Thankfully, you made it to a chair before then, burying your face into your arms that were folded over the table as you slumped against it.

Tired and weak sobs wracked your worn out body, and you let the steady stream of tears be soaked up in the sleeve of your hoodie. As for how your mind was fairing, you couldn’t really tell. Getting a grip on your wavering thoughts felt impossible. It was an uncontrollable back and forth between what had happened, and fleeting attempts to ground yourself.

That task of focusing on the present wasn’t something you could do alone, at least not at the moment. But the sound of your phone ringing could. Your heart stopped at the auditory intrusion, and hesitantly you pulled the device out of your pocket.

The caller ID had you relapsing, broken cries unable to be contained for a few seconds as you tried to figure out how to deal with this new and greatly unappreciated problem. Your eyes scanned over the buzzing and lit up device, reading over Shouta’s name repeatedly.

You let the call go to voicemail.

A moment of reprieve―and then the ringtone started for a second time.

With bated breath, you stared at the device. You could let it go to voicemail once again. You could blow it off as not being near the phone when you were inevitably questioned on the occurrence.

Or you could answer the damn thing now, and be done with the weight of the night.

On the final ring before the automated response kicked in, you pressed the ‘accept call’ button. In lifting the phone to your ear, the gruff and concerned voice of Shouta broke through before you could make any move to initiate the dreaded conversation first.

“Sorry to bother you, just checking to see if you got home safe. There was an incident in your area in case you weren’t already aware…”

The line went silent as you took a moment to collect yourself before giving a response.

You sucked in a deep breath, “I’m alright, thanks for calling.” The appreciative lilt in your tone was as genuine as you could make it. But the shakiness, the crack in your voice as you spoke―it was a dead giveaway.

“...Then why do you sound like you’ve been crying for hours? You need to tell me if something happened, (y/n).” Even with the way the phone call distorted his voice, the sternness still pierced your resolve as if he was standing right in front of you.

Your words were shaky as you felt a plethora of distressing emotions bubbling rapidly inside of you. “I said I’m fine, Shouta. You don’t need to―”

“Don’t lie to me. You know I’m only asking because I’m worried about you, alright? Clearly something’s wrong, just―tell me what happened.”

You wondered if he was aware of just how unfriendly he sounded while saying something like that. It was more so a harsh command for a response, rather than a gentle urge to inform him of your wellbeing. Like he was bothered with you trying to remain strong, and not burdening him with your problems.

That was your issue with Shouta―a hint of what you could only assume was annoyance lingered in his words where you were concerned. At least, that’s how it was when you were behaving in such a manner that didn’t comply with how he’d decided you should act. You’d seen him in a light that was enjoyable. When you first met him, or after he’d already chewed you out during those Saturday nights and thus no longer felt the need to pressure you on what truth you’d developed over your state.

Unfortunately, right now your state went against all those lies you told. An emotional wreck, beaten down by the hands of those too caught up in some captivating scene to take account of the consequences to their ignorance.

Determination was wavering in your mind, and if you didn’t end the call soon then the chance of making all the effort you’d put into keeping them from the truth would be for nothing.

“Really, everything is okay. Listen, I’m sort of busy right now…” You stifled a sob into a clenched fist, “I-I can’t talk at the moment, I’m sorry―I have to go.”

Your finger was flying to the ‘end call’ button as soon as the words left your mouth. His protests rang through the speaker, but exactly what he said was beyond you.

The line went dead, and your phone shut off. It clattered against the wooden table as you dropped it. Your hands lifted to rub the hot tears falling down your cheeks, full body tremors wreaking havoc as you remained seated.

In the silence of your apartment, your emotions settled into a static numbness. Your eyes remained trained on the table, mindlessly taking in the details of the wood’s grain. Whatever would happen as a result of you abruptly cutting off the conversation wasn’t a scenario you could formulate.

The screen on your phone remained black, and you made no move to turn it on. You never checked it for the time that was passing as you remained utterly drained at the kitchen table. Something in the back of your mind told you that yes―you could very well get up and go to bed. Or maybe you could bring yourself out of this empty feeling with a distraction.

You could even call Shouta back, perhaps apologize for behaviour that was out of your control...

...No, you couldn’t do that.

Possibilities of various actions presented themselves, and yet you remained unmoving. Your breath had steadied to a slow intake and outtake, disregarding the quivering that still persisted. You didn’t want to think about what had happened, so you didn’t think at all.

You settled into that state for an unknown amount of time. And it took a while, but slowly you could focus on the background noise around you. The air conditioner hummed from the vents against the wall, the thumping of footsteps from residents above you sounded off a couple of times.

Actually...there were more than just those few footsteps.

Still in a daze, you trained your weak focus on that sound. Distant, then coming closer. You turned your head to the front door of your apartment where they stopped.

Three loud raps against the frame. Firm, steady, and done with purpose.

Your heart sunk into your chest.

(End of part 6)

_____

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jubesy · 3 years

Note

Could you do 43 with like a panic attack hurt/comfort scenario with joe and cherry please? I just feel like it would fit with cherry having anxiety and stuff 💅

Thank you for your request, anon! I tried my best to fill the prompt, so I hope you like it~ Though, instead of a panic attack, it deals with Cherry having a night terror, which also can happen to those with anxiety.

All cases may differ, so this is based on my experience. Please be aware, there is a scene where Joe witnesses Cherry having a night terror.

#43 “Squeeze my hand if you can hear me.”

Also available on Ao3.

Link to my master list of Matcha Blossom drabbles

Joe grit his teeth as he took a turn a little too tightly on his bike. He managed to correct himself before wiping out. That was the last thing he needed. It was late. Or early, depending. And he’d been woken up by an alert on his phone. A message from Cherry’s A.I.

Carla 2:25AM: Master slept through his alarm. Carla 2:38AM: Master’s heart rate is elevated.

If only he’d heard the first one. Joe sped forward. They didn’t live too far apart, but it was significantly farther than the walk they used to take as kids.

When he arrived at Cherry’s, Joe parked his motorcycle and ran to the door, pulling out his spare key. He didn’t trip the alarm. After all, Carla knew he was coming.

He went straight to Cherry’s room. Thankfully, he found him in bed, illuminated by the soft light from his bedside lamp. But Cherry was not sleeping. He’d thrown the covers off, his face flushed and his chest heaving.

Carefully, Joe approached him. “Hey, Kaoru--”

Cherry let out a sharp sound, halfway between a cry and a gasp. He tossed his head to the side, kicking out his arms and legs.

Shit. Joe really wished he’d heard that first message. If he wasn’t such a heavy sleeper, he might have gotten here before--

“N-No…!” Cherry thrashed, one of his legs getting caught in the sheets. He shouted again and Joe quickly untangled him, catching Cherry’s foot before it landed a kick to his chest.

“Kaoru,” he said again, using his other hand to hold Cherry’s ankle to keep his leg still. “Kaoru, it’s Kojiro. You’re having a--” But he was cut off when, with a surprising amount of strength, Cherry broke from his grasp and sat up.

“No!” Cherry screamed at him, eyes wide and unseeing.

Joe knew what was coming. And just as Cherry was about to bolt, Joe wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight and keeping him from jumping up and off the bed.

“No!” Cherry said again, struggling in his hold. “No…no…” He kept trying to break free, but Joe held firm.

“It’s okay,” Joe whispered against Cherry’s temple. “No one can hurt you. I’ve got you. You’re okay.”

Gradually, Cherry’s movements slowed until he was nearly limp in Joe’s arms. But when Joe pulled back, Cherry’s eyes were still open, glazed and blank.

Joe released him, sliding his hands down Cherry’s arms to grip his hands. “Hey, Kaoru,” he said softly, but received no response. “Kaoru,” he continued, wetting his lips. “Squeeze my hand if you can hear me.” There was the slightest twitch of Cherry’s fingers, but nothing more. Joe took a deep breath. “I’m going to tuck you back in, okay?”

Then, every so gently, Joe laid Cherry back down, straightening his nightclothes and pulling the sheets back up to his chin. He knew it was very unlikely for Cherry to have another episode tonight. But he didn’t want to leave. Just in case.

“Carla,” Joe called. “Lights out, please.”

A few hours later, Joe awoke to a finger poking him in the shoulder. He didn’t even open his eyes. “And a very good morning to you, Kaoru,” he said, voice rough from sleep.

“You’re in my bed,” Cherry noted.

Joe chuckled and cracked his eyes open. “Nothing gets past you, huh?”

Cherry swatted his chest. “Why are you in my bed, Kojiro?”

Joe swallowed. Cherry hardly ever remembered it the next day. And Joe almost didn’t want to tell him. But that wasn’t fair. Cherry deserved to know. “You slept through your alarm.”

The hand near his chest shook slightly and Joe reached up to grab a hold of it.

“I see…” Cherry chewed on his lip.

“Carla messaged me,” Joe went on. “But I didn’t get it until your vitals were all…” He gestured vaguely, still holding Cherry’s hand in his. “I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner.”

Cherry nodded and then shook his head. “No, it’s fine, I--” He wet his lips. “I didn’t...hurt you, did I?”

Joe placed Cherry’s palm against his chest. “A big, tough guy like me?” he teased. “Never.”

“I’m being serious!” Cherry’s fingers spasmed, but he didn’t remove his hand. “I hate it. Not being in control. Not...remembering.” He frowned.

“It sucks,” Joe finished for him. “I wish I could make it go away.”

Cherry sighed. “The alarm had been working.” His gaze shifted over to Carla, still in sleep mode and charging by the wall. “I must have been exhausted if I slept through it.”

Joe hummed before leaning in closer and pressing their foreheads together. “Well, if it ever happens again, I’ll make sure not to sleep through the first text message.”

At that, Cherry snorted. “You? Please.” He rolled his eyes. “You sleep like the dead.” He drew back. “Besides, you live farther away now, so it’s probably inconvenient for you to come all the way here just to...tuck me back in.” The rest was left unsaid.

“I could always sleep over,” Joe suggested. “Not all the time, but on nights when you’re especially worn out?”

Cherry actually looked like he was thinking it over before he sighed. “I can’t ask you to do that.”

Joe raised an eyebrow. “Oh, so I’m your first emergency contact, but having me spend the night is out of the question?” He shook his head. “And you’re not asking. I’m offering.”

Cherry eyed him suspiciously, as if waiting for Joe to tell him it was just a joke. But, after a moment, he seemed convinced. “First of all,” he began. “You’re not my first emergency contact. Carla is--”

“Doesn’t count--”

“--and secondly, if you’re really fine with dropping whatever you’re doing to sleep here on occasion, I suppose that’s fine.” He finished with yet another sigh.

“See? Was that so hard?” Joe asked.

“Yes,” Cherry answered immediately and then cracked a smile. A soft one. “Thank you. For coming over last night.” He moved closer and ducked his head under his chin, pressing his cheek to Joe’s chest. “You’re a good man.”

Joe grinned and wrapped his arms around Cherry, giving him a squeeze. “That’s why I’m your number one, right?”

There was a puff of warm air against his skin as Cherry laughed. “Number two,” he corrected.

Request a drabble here!

#matcha blossom #nanjo kojiro #sakurayashiki kaoru #sk8 the infinity #sk8 #drabble #quote drabble #quote drabbles #answered #anon #night terror #cw night terror #anxiety

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jjuuppiter · 3 years

Note

Hi. Sorry if I’m speaking out of turn but I saw your post and elitism reblog and thought I’d chime in, as a former member of the fandom who has been lurking around recently. Disclaimer I don’t speak for OP but it seems like OP might have been from the first few years of the fandom’s existence based on what they said in the post so I’d like to offer some context that could have led to OP’s “bad” take.

There was a lot of crap going on behind the scenes or on social media with Astruc and Zag that led to folks disliking both the show for its narrative choices and the creator/staff (around S1-S2, years 2016-2018). No details to share, just know many were often at odds with Astruc and/or Zag as early as 2016 (ML premiered late 2015).

So it’s difficult to blame them for being bitter or hyperbolic because at the time, we were given this idea it would be a great story based on its premise. then S2 rolled in and we were often disappointed by story decisions or what appeared to be regressions of character development. In other words, promises not delivered, expectations not met, money over quality. It got to a point some of us were able to point out which episodes were done by the cheaper studio and which were by SAMG cuz the cheaper one often had inferior animation.

There was also a ton of fandom discourse regarding the sexualization of the characters, with many people on both sides of the issue. Some of the most popular fics *at the time* were rated M or E (like that one BDSM aged-up fic or the one where teenage Adrien had no idea what a woman’s period was and part of the fic was just them getting into very sexualized situations). Heck, there was so much discourse on Gabrienette (yes Gabrienette). Idk how things are now wrt fanfiction or the state of the fandom but that was what it was like when I was around. I suspect that’s why some people have since stereotyped the ML fandom as people who like sexualizing teenagers in fic. Cuz the fics (and art) at the time often did it, esp prior to the Tumblr Purge of 2017. The word “p*dophilia* got thrown around a lot too.

Now that the fandom is so big though, it’s hard to generalize the whole community or even to take issue with elitism 😅 (elitism was also something talked about during my time...it was no use). Now some folks who may be coming back probably do prefer just the fan art and AUs. But that’s them.

Again, I’m sorry if I’ve spoken out of turn. You may ignore this ask if you’d like and esp if you already knew everything I talked about 😅

hey thank you anon for telling me the early years of the fandom! i only casually watched the show for s1-s3 so i didnt know what was happening in the fandom before and i dont follow any of the creators of the show since i dont want my feeling fot the show to be influencd by them.

about fanfictions... im not gonna say much... but every fandom has their fair share of questionable fanfics and i think it's not something we can control anymore... people will write what they wanna write

and yep the person maybe doesnt have any ill intention when posting it but i still feel it's not right for them to generalize (and kinda mock) the whole ml fanfictions community even if they are a veteran... because tbh i found a lot of good fanfics from 2016 that i think are wholesome and arent sexualized at all... so i believe even in the early year of the fandom there were a lot of good contents too ^^

sorry if i said something wrong! this is just my opinion as one of the rookie mlb fans ^^

#ask #jupiter rants #fandom salt

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clan-sayeed-fic · 3 years

Text

Business (Kamilah Sayeed & MC)

Previous chapters: 1, 2, 3

Book: Bloodbound (property of Pixelberry Studios)

Pairing: Kamilah Sayeed & MC: Amy (I do not own those characters, they’re the property of Pixelberry Studios as well)

Warnings: angst, strong language, illustrative descriptions of situations full of violence and brutality, might cause distress

Rating: Mature

Author’s note: I’m not a native English speaker, I’m sorry for any mistakes (feel free to correct me).

It's been a month or so since I've posted the previous chapter. From what I remember, we've ended the last part on Kamilah and Amy having an intimate moment. At one point, the girl got second thoughts and left Kamilah's penthouse.

So, here we are, in chapter 4th, right after the situation. I hope you'll enjoy the continuation of the story 💕

Also, I'd like to thank Anons that have been asking me about the fic, and @saratustra4 for asking me about the next chapter 💕 For some reason, it helped me come back to the writing. Also, if I fail my study because of that, I know who to blame hahah *kidding* 😂😂

~2300 words

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Chapter 4

"Fuck..."

Harsh tone flew all the way to smooth surface of the car window, hitting it hard, only to bounce off the reflection of green eyes trapped inside.

Amy brushed stubborn hair away from her blushing face. Blonde strands left marks behind as if they had burned her skin permanently. Her lips were red and hot after the kiss she had shared only a few moments before.

The kiss to which she agreed so foolishly.

What were you thinking, she cursed herself in thoughts, letting anger rage inside her veins. She was slowly losing control over her body as a small spark dared to shine inside her irises.

The girl closed her eyes, leaning against something that felt like a block of ice, rather than her car. Coldness reached nerves under her skin, easing the tension, helping collect thoughts on what she should do next.

Because it didn't seem like fate was on her side that day. Amy forgot to grab her purse from the dresser at Kamilah's penthouse, so she didn't have keys to her car and phone to call for a lift.

But most of all,

she had no courage to come back and face the woman.

What if she suspected anything? Question screamed inside her mind, forcing her to move away from the car. Fear pulled her closer into the embrace of a much greater danger, fooling her judgement.

It tricked her mind enough to make her forget about the threat waiting in the darkness.

***

New York City was resting after a full day of events. It was then that Amy found herself alone in the street, left in the company of her loud thoughts.

The girl considered asking someone for help, but the idea seemed almost equally risky as walking on her own at this hour. It would only call unnecessary attention, not mentioning what could happen if she came across people who wished harm to her family.

Being one of the Paines had its consequences.

Amy moved toward the dark alley. She finally got out of the sight of warm light peeking outside from apartments. It seemed to watch her every move, trying to hunt her down at all costs.

One of the girl's hands moved to her mouth. Fingers subtly traced over her lower lip as to remind themselves of the previous desire. The desire that made Amy feel things she never expected to experience.

Not when it went to vampires.

Her body should have reacted differently. It shouldn't have let her fall for tricks of these beasts. She was supposed to be better than that. Too smart to get fooled by their attractiveness. Too powerful to get fed with their poisonous words.

So what happened this time? What made her give in to Kamilah's touch? What was responsible for this feeling inside, this...

Suddenly Amy heard a noise coming from behind. The urge to turn around and follow the sound was tempting, but she managed to fight it. She had been through the training before, so she knew the most important rule.

Never rely on your sight.

The girl closed her eyes, focusing on the feeling overwhelming her body. Listening to her accelerated heartbeat, accompanied by the growing tension in her muscles as her body sensed attackers.

They were passing through the alley like a shadow desperately seeking for the opportunity to escape the moonlight. To finally creep up on both sides, cutting off only ways of escape. It was too late, and at once, too soon to react, so Amy stood in place patiently, preparing herself for what was to come.

"Who do we have here?" shudders travelled down her spine.

As soon as the voice pierced through her ears, all of the colours vanished from the world around. Values of the surroundings became muted as if they were just a useless distraction for her eyes. Instead, everything took the tones of grey, leaving the earth on its own in the fight between light and darkness.

"She looks familiar, huh?" her eyes moved, following the second voice.

Only to catch a spark of crimson in the man's stare. No one else but vampires could make her body react this way. Their presence heightened her senses, changing them into something inhuman.

The girl raised her hands, showing an act of surrender. She needed to buy herself more time because they still didn't come close enough.

The adrenaline was not high enough.

"Look, guys, I am not looking for trouble," calm tone of her voice hid fear growing inside her chest.

But both men ignored her words, continuing getting closer. It was clear that they didn't realize how big of a mistake it was. Because with each of their step, she was getting better access to thoughts inside their heads.

"Oh, I got this," the one behind her spoke again. "Blonde hair, sweet voice, and even sweeter smell of blood. It must be Paine's daughter."

"I guess we found her without company," the one in front of her tilted his head slightly. "Our master will be so pleased to meet you."

Amy turned her body to the side enough to have a clear view of both of them.

"One more step," the girl growled, feeling every muscle in her body tense.

But it only made them more amused.

"Uuu, I feel threatened," a sarcastic tone challenged her nerves.

It came from the one on her right, a total blabbermouth. Amy squinted her eyes and gazed into his, spotting this characteristic glow inside them, a remnant of humanity. That was a clue to recognize a newly turned vampire.

"You should be," a tiny smile danced in the corner of her mouth.

She turned away from him, focusing all her attention on his friend instead.

And the game began.

Sounds of vampires' talk faded away into the darkness, blending with shadows. As the world around her calmed down significantly, moving in slow motion from then on. The wind on her shoulder became barely noticeable as coldness lost all its intensity in the air. Amy's heartbeat was steady and loud, drumming inside her head, not giving peace. Her blood seemed to stop running inside her veins, replaced by the adrenaline instead.

The same adrenaline that made her green eyes shine with gold, creating a bridge of connection between her and the man. Giving her a sense of his principal thoughts. How badly he wanted to..., kidnap her.

Her mind raced on the wires of his thoughts as she slowly lost herself in the labyrinth of memories. But she stayed there, travelling through his life until she reached the part with his weaknesses. Amy grabbed them with her mind, ready to manipulate his fears. There was only a hint of hesitation before she twisted the most painful memory inside his head, playing with it like a toy.

Until he had no other choice left, but to surrender.

His stare lacked previous confidence, showing unsureness that she planted all over his chest. The roots of anxiety grew deep inside him, almost reaching his dead heart.

That's how the hunter became her prey.

"I am not," Amy whispered, putting the idea inside his head.

"She's not," words left his mouth emotionless.

"I am not your target," her breathing got sharp and unstable, her body was getting weaker one second after another.

"We've made a mistake," he spoke aloud, staring emptily at the darkness.

"What?" the other man's high pitched tone reached them from behind. "What the hell are you talking about, man?"

Amy almost had him wrapped around her little finger, locking the idea inside his mind. Making him realize that she was not the person they had been looking for, that they should let her go free.

But then something interrupted her.

Wires of his mind twisted unexpectedly, pulling her out of this part of the brain. Instead, she witnessed a different memory, finding herself in front of a stranger hidden under a black cloak. A deep shadow covered the person's face, keeping all the features unrecognizable.

But something about the scene seemed so wrong.

"It's not a memory," she spoke, forgetting about attackers. "It's a vision."

She had no control over things appearing before her eyes. Amy wanted to leave the scene, but it was holding her tight in its claws, draining too much energy from her body. The pressure inside her head was growing as the bridge between her, and the vampire was falling apart.

But then the vision deformed, drawing her attention to the figure's movements. Black fabric flew in the air, dancing and twisting in front of her, increasing dizziness. Presence of the mysterious person brought back coldness on Amy's body, stabbing her deep under the skin.

She looked at the stranger one last time to spot a smirk dancing on their pale lips, a smile of victory and pride. But then the vision went blurry, filling her head with unbearable pain.

And at the same time, breaking her connection with the vampire.

"You...you are..." the man stuttered, waking up from the trance. And as soon as he fully realized the threat, his eyes flashed red. "Get her!"

His partner jumped toward Amy immediately, using his vampire speed, leaving her no time to react. So before she even thought about avoiding the attack, he was already there, pushing her away. The force of the hit sent her body high in the air until it met a hard surface of the wall before finally landing on the ground.

Blonde strands of hair changed into light red, dyed by the liquid running down from the wound on her temple. It leaked on her cheek, leaving a mark before her shaky hand wiped it away from the skin. A hiss of pain accompanied by fear escaped her mouth when she realized what happened.

As those green eyes stared emptily at her fingers covered in blood.

"That explains why you're so valuable," the vampire spoke aloud, freed from her influence.

In a flash, both men were standing next to her, tempted by the smell. The flavour of iron tortured their throats, begging to satisfy the thirst.

The leading vampire grabbed her throat, lifting her body against the wall with no mercy. Amy's feet were hanging above the ground, desperately searching for balance. The growing pressure around her trachea caused her to choke in a last-ditch attempt to catch a breath.

"I need to taste it," the younger one licked his lips hungrily, hypnotized by the path of blood on her neck.

Go ahead, Amy's thoughts screamed, challenging, drink, and it's going to be the last thing you ever taste.

"We will deliver her to our master first," the older one interrupted harshly. "That was the plan."

Against these words, his temptation was not any weaker. The desire to dip fangs into the girl's neck was messing with years of training. But at that moment, nothing mattered more than the idea of blood running down his throat as he drinks every single drop from her mortal body.

If only both vampires weren't so distracted, they would have noticed a stranger emerging from shadows.

"I'll take it from here," an icy tone sounded behind their back, drawing attention.

But it was too late.

In one moment, both of them were pushed far away from the girl who fell on the ground heavily, unable to keep balance.

As soon as the grip around Amy's throat loosened up, her lungs began screaming for help. She was desperately searching for air, but it seemed to avoid her chest, leaving her breathless and weak instead. All she saw were blurred figures moving with impossible speed before her eyes. There was no way to guess which ones were her attackers and which one the saviour, no way to figure out who was on the winning side.

But there was no point of knowing that, no hope left for her.

Amy's eyes filled with tears because of the lack of air until she shut them down completely. That's when noises of cracking bones flew through the alley before leaving it alone with silence.

The fight was over.

Hers was over too.

"Amy, I need you to calm down," a familiar voice echoed inside her head followed by a soft hand on her arm. "I need you to focus on my breathing. With me, in..." the woman took a breath, and let it out with the other words," and out."

Amy opened her eyes, but there was nothing else than darkness in front of her. The soothing touch on her shoulder eased her anxiety, helping to follow the advice. Her first attempt failed but soon after the air filled her lungs, giving long-awaited peace.

"Take it easy," Kamilah said when the girl tried to move too rapidly.

"How did you..." her voice was shaky, lacking its previous sweetness.

She looked through the alley nervously, but bodies of vampires were nowhere to find. There was no sign left after the situation that had put her life at risk.

"You forgot your purse," Kamilah interrupted with an explanation as her eyes travelled through Amy's body, searching for injuries. At least other than the obvious one. "I saw your car in the garage, so I knew I have to track you down" she swallowed hard. "Your bleeding made it much easier."

It made Amy realize that she still had her temple and hair covered in blood. Her eyes stared at Kamilah with mistrust, watching her moves.

"Let me take care of it," Kamilah pulled a handkerchief out of the pocket and carefully placed it on the injury.

Amy's hand moved there hurriedly, taking the cloth from her. But as soon as their hands touched, some spark of electricity ran through both women's bodies. Their eyes connected again, gazing deeply into one another with a sudden understanding.

"Apply pressure right here," Kamilah whispered, moving away.

"Let's take you home, shall we?"

----------------------

Next chapter: 5

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tag list: @evexofxtime @kamilah-is-queen @scarletheart @helpconfusedpersonhere @ayushixo @nydeiri @vonda-b-real

#choices fanfiction #bloodbound fic #kamilah sayeed #kamilah sayeed fic #bloodbound kamilah #bb mc #bb kamilah #vampires #business fic #angst #choices stories you play #bloodbound choices #bloodkeeper

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sweetdreamsofgelato · 4 years

Text

Wedding Knells

[Part 2] [Part 3]

Pairing: Henry x Female!Reader (2nd person narrative from Henry's POV. It sounds odd, but just run with me)

Word count: 2272

Rating: E for Everyone

Warnings: Angst-riddled romance (because I mean, it's me), Brief mentions of drinking, Allusions to future smut. There is NO SMUT in this part, but your patience is greatly appreciated.

Summary: You and Henry have spent a lifetime in a reluctant game of cat and mouse, and it all finally comes to a head when you attend the same wedding.

Anonymous said:

Hello there, Henry has been on my feels lately and reading your stuff only made this crush get even bigger 😂 I just imagine Henry seeing a girl who in times was his bestfriend but then had to move to Europe, at a wedding and they both end at the same hotel room? If you know what I mean, wedding feels recalling the love they felt for each other but never told 🙏🏻

A/N: Okay, to start, thank you for the love, and I can wholeheartedly relate. Henry has completely taken over my thoughts and ruins my life on a daily basis, so it's nice that I can not only share my torment with the rest of you but that you also enjoy it as much as I do. 😈

Now. Ahem.

Anon. Dear, sweet beautiful Anon. I want to kiss you, but I also want to scream at you for even suggesting this, because it hits so frighteningly close to home for me that there was absolutely no way I could refuse to write it and, in good conscience, live with myself. I am certain that I took far too many angsty liberties and for that I am sorry. Write what you know, right?

TL;DR I have no control over myself and I'm sorry, but not sorry. Come back for Part 2 and 3 if you want smut.

Reposting my works on other sites or platforms is prohibited. Reblogs, likes, and comments are, as always, greatly appreciated.

Henry watched you glide across the dance floor. A seemingly innocuous undertaking to any of the surrounding wedding guests. To anyone else, he appeared exactly as everyone would expect him. Cool and confident with a mildly devilish air—which was precisely as intended. He eased back against his chair, nursing his fourth drink and silently thanking the universe for his remarkable, if undeserved, gift for pretence.

It wasn't a complete surprise that you were here, and he wasn't particularly disappointed by your presence. It was quite the opposite, if he were completely truthful. Nevertheless, he stubbornly made every effort to avoid you over the entire weekend. Most of the families in attendance had known each other for years. Years of birthdays, dinner parties, and shared holidays. Trips to the coast when the weather was warm and inviting. Nights filled with obligatory adolescent mischief. There were few memories upon which he looked back fondly that didn't include you.

And then one day, like a fog lifting in the midmorning sun, you were gone. Off to live your life.

Without him.

Not that he had had any claim over you. The two of you spent the majority of your formative years dancing around your feelings for each other. Feelings that weren't a closely guarded secret but were also never expressed aloud. Most of your mutual friends remarked, with maddening regularity, that you two were obviously something. Best friends and confidantes, and yet collectively far, far more than just that. Henry had never acted upon them—out of both lack of self-confidence and a healthy fear of the enormity of what you two could be.

Inevitably, life took you both down your own paths, which seemed to cross too much and not enough at the same time. With every year, Henry felt the chasm between you grow wider. So much time had now passed that it was practically immoral to ask for the opportunity to be something more to you. It wasn't fair and it certainly wasn't realistic to believe that you still carried a torch for him, even if that was exactly what he'd done for you.

The distance at which you held each other was as necessary as it was tragic.

He caught your gaze over your dance partner's shoulder and suffered a brief but achingly familiar sense of self-loathing. It was a fleeting, wordless moment that spoke volumes.

"Hey you," your voice, still breathless from exertion, startled him back to the present. Your eyes were bright with excitement and likely too much champagne, and you smiled as if on the edge of laughter.

Henry stiffened, having been so adrift in his own thoughts that he hadn't noticed your approach.

"Hey you." His response was affectionate, if restrained.

"Shall we take a walk?" you asked, your head motioning toward the lawn that stretched between the romantically canopied reception and the stately manor that housed the wedding guests for the duration of the festivities.

The music slowly died away, along with the straggling vestiges of his good sense. He tossed back the remainder of his drink and rose, grabbing his suit jacket from the back of the chair.

"Your date won't miss you?" He nodded toward the annoyingly handsome but unfamiliar man currently wending through the revelry and toward the bartender.

"Not my date. Just a passing dance partner," you replied simply.

Henry didn't require any further encouragement. He fell into step with you, proceeding down the stone path that led across the lawn and through the manor gardens.

"It's good to see you." You broke the silence, as was your habit. A product of both personality and necessity. "It's been too long."

And it truly had been. The last time your paths crossed was last Christmas, yet it felt like a lifetime ago. At the time, Henry had been sorely tempted to ask you to go with him on holiday, but he'd known that particular ask would've been neither simple nor meaningless. That request would've come with unspoken expectations that he really hadn't been in position to deal with, and it wouldn't have been fair to either of you. He resigned himself to the all too infrequent comments on social media, casual conversations via texts, and the painfully rare phone calls to which he'd grown begrudgingly accustomed.

"Likewise," he nodded, sliding his arms through the sleeves of his jacket. The cool evening air was refreshing rather than biting, so the extra layer was unnecessary, but as a sudden icy chill of foreboding crept over him, the jacket felt more like much-needed armour.

"How have you been?" you asked, restlessly tapping the corner of your clutch against your palm.

Good. Great. Fantastic. Busy. Lonely. Miserable. Hopelessly tortured.

"Fine." He really needed to stop going to weddings. They dredged up all sorts of emotions that were better left buried, and the edges of his self-restraint were already frayed. In hindsight, it would have been smarter to decline your invitation for a walk, but you had caught him in an egregiously weak moment during which he couldn't bear the thought of refusing you.

A dissatisfied expression flickered across your face before you soldiered on with questions ranging from casual niceties to more invasive enquiries into his current state of existence. Henry attempted to keep his answers as short as possible, often turning your questions back to you rather than asking after anything meaningful. If not properly controlled, he would say or ask too much and regret it later. You always had that effect on him, and it was a source of endless frustration.

It wasn't long before you found yourselves in front of the grand staircase leading to the upper floors of the guest rooms.

"I'm going upstairs. Will I see you tomorrow before you leave?" you asked, “I’d like to say goodbye.”

He grimaced. Goodbye. How many times had he said goodbye and prayed that it would or wouldn't be the last? He loathed that word; that one ruthless word that never failed to strike him square in the chest and force the air from his lungs. A cannonball tearing through the broadside of his heart, leaving him splintered and wrecked in its wake.

He wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or the interminable state of emotional turmoil, but Henry was barely maintaining his carefully cultivated self-control. A degree of forbearance that was a particular point of pride and singularly resolute.

Until it wasn't.

He was, if nothing else, a perpetually self-possessed man.

Until he wasn't.

"I'll walk you up."

You stopped; your hand gripped the smooth wooden bannister as you watched him with unveiled apprehension. A look undeniably rooted in the knowledge that to follow you upstairs would put you both at great risk of crossing a line drawn too many years ago.

Seems he wasn't the only one affected by weddings.

Henry rested a hand on your lower back, the silky brush of your evening gown sending sparks tingling across his fingers, prickly over his arms, and shocked him straight in the heart. Sparks that kindled a fire he never should've permitted to be lit. He nudged you upstairs with a gentle reverence that directly contradicted every single raw emotion coursing through him. The staircase stretched endlessly before him, and as he ascended, he wryly wondered if this is what it felt like to be marched up the gallows.

He followed you through a labyrinth of dimly lit corridors, the click of your heels echoing in the deserted halls. The evening was young, and everyone was undoubtedly still enjoying the celebrations outside.

You stopped in front of the door to your room and extracted the key from your bag, hesitating briefly before sliding it into lock. The click of the latch giving way sounded like a gunshot. In that moment, Henry would've sworn the air shook from it. That he shook from it. Immediately, he withdrew his hand from your back and hastily pressed himself against the opposite wall.

You turned and blew out a shaky breath, your weighty stare boring into him from across the corridor.

A few more beats of silence passed before you spoke. "Thanks for seeing me up. I'll be sure to find you in the morning to say goodbye."

There was that word again. The distance between you once again felt insurmountable.

You were halfway into your room before Henry's hand shot out and closed around your wrist.

"Wait—" There was a desperation in his voice he could no longer hold back.

You turned slightly, but your gaze didn't rise to meet his.

"Just, wait."

You'd both spent a lifetime waiting, and it felt outrageously selfish to ask for even a moment more, but he did anyway. Panic bubbled within him as he scrambled to find the right words.

Any words.

"I—" Henry didn't even know where to begin. His hands wearily scrubbed his face then raked through his hair, giving it a frustrated tug before his arms fell to his sides in despair. His nostrils flared, and he released a long, exasperated breath as he fought internally between what he wanted to say and what he ought to say. Whatever truths laid bare tonight could never be taken back. Henry was officially sounding the death knell of your past.

Your eyes finally met his, and they simmered with restrained ire. He was visibly taken aback. "You’re upset?"

You turned and flung your clutch through the open door and into the darkness of your room. Henry was wholly grateful you hadn't thrown it at him, though it would be no less than he deserved.

"All I've ever done is wait, Henry!" Your fingertips pressed into your temples. "I've waited and waited and for what?" you gestured wildly, "This tortuous game of emotional tug of war that we keep playing is unbearable and it has gone on far too long."

Your voice shook, overwrought with rage and indignation. "Every time we meet. Every superficial conversation, every heated stare and surreptitious touch, every painful goodbye," you jabbed an accusatory finger in his direction, "every time you slid into a casual conversation with me when I started a new relationship, just to remind me of your ever-looming presence, and every time I did the same to you."

Your outrage retracted with guilt at the admission, but you quickly rebounded. "I love you so much that my entire soul aches from it. Constantly. So yes, I'm upset! I am furious! The ceaseless, agonising reminders of everything I want but can never have are driving me mad!"

You were pacing now, unable to remain still, and all Henry could do was watch silently, because deep down he knew that every ounce of anger thrown at him was justly earned. An honourable man would have ended this long ago, but he was selfish in his need to keep you even if it was at arm's length. Sure, you could have said something and taken that first step, but Henry would have immediately shut down, because that is what he did every single time you previously tried. He would have run and not looked back, because his love for you was permanently bound to shamefully paralysing insecurity. It turned him into the worst sort of coward.

Cowardice or no, this was happening, and the sheer magnitude of the reckoning finally washed over him.

"What do you want from me?" It was a knee-jerk response made somewhat out of anger and fear, but mostly born of the desperate need for someone to tell him the right thing to do, because he wasn't sure what that was anymore.

"For once is your life, I want you to say something!" you shot back.

"Fine!" Henry threw his hands up in defeat. He turned to you, forcing your attention entirely to him. He was only going to say it once, because the thought of having to repeat it left him thoroughly awash with guilt for having waited to do so in the first place.

"Every time I'm with you, I never want to leave. I want every conversation to be never-ending." His whole body shook with frightening urgency. The carefully built but steadily cracking walls that dammed up every last ounce of feeling for you finally broke, and there was no holding back the flood of truth. His voice was ragged with it.

"With every touch, I want thousands more, and I never, ever want to say goodbye again."

Because he truly, deeply didn't. He realised, startlingly, that he would give up everything. He would gladly surrender every single hard-won privilege in his life if it meant he never had to say goodbye again. He would happily live and die in abject obscurity as long as you were by his side. Henry reached for you, frantically needing something to anchor him against the onslaught of an entire lifetime of repressed emotion.

"I love you so much that it absolutely terrifies me, and if I have to go one more day without being able to call you mine, it will destroy me." He gripped your elbows as he attempted to catch his breath, completely stunned and thoroughly exhausted.

"Was that acceptable?" Henry whispered, searching your face for some indication of affirmation. Eagerly terrified for any hint of response.

"No!"

Henry reeled, his grip tightening as he mustered the remainder of his strength to stamp down the desire to shake you. It was official; he'd reached the end of his rope.

"What do you mean, no?!"

"I've changed my mind!"

Henry sputtered incoherently.

You grasped the front of his suit jacket and yanked him toward you. The look on your face so undeniably needy that it bordered on feral, and left absolutely no possibility for misinterpretation.

"I want you to do something about it."

Please respond to my tag list post in my profile (or send a message) if you wish to be added to my Henryverse tags.

@tumblnewby @henrythickcavill @hell1129-blog @speakerforthedead0-blog @meowpurrbooks @mary-ann84 @frencchfries @desiredposion @kinbhot4henners @omgkatinka @luna-aestas @trippedmetaldetector @michelehansel @peakygroupie @mstgsmy

#sweetdreamsofgelato writes #anon request #henry x y/n #henry x reader #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill #henry x you #henry cavill x female reader #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill x you #henry cavill angst #rpf #henry cavill rpf #fic: wedding knells

398 notes · View notes

violetnotez · 4 years

Note

let's have more bois with pregnant s/os! 😂😂😂 Tamaki,Mirio,and Shinsou their reactions to finding out their gonna be daddies ( ˘ ³˘)♥

Omg yes anon, these boys would have the cutest reactions to finding out they got their s/o knocked up ❤️

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Hc: Pregnant S/O

Pairing: Tamaki x reader, Mirio x reader, Shinsou x reader

Also, I realized I should specify the ages of all the characters! Everyone will be aged up to like around 20-21 ☺️

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Tamaki

Tamaki has just finished patrolling for the day when he got a strange message from you, asking him to pick up some things from the market

That wasn’t particularly unusual, you would occasionally ask him to do so after work if he wasn’t too tired

But it seemed like you were trying to message someone else and not him-your message had asked “her” to grab “a lot of disposable cups”

You had also sent an image...Tamaki’s curiosity was too strong, his fingers clicking on the picuture instantly

His eyes gazed at the list, instantly recognizing the handwriting as your own. The list only had a few items, such as milk, flour, choclate...but then, at the very end, you had wrote something that truly threw his mind of out control

You wanted whoever you were texting to buy pregnancy tests

His anxiety instantly went through the roof-pregnany?! You thought you were pregnant?!? How long had you been thinking this?!? We’re you okay?!? Who was even with you getting you this stuff?!

He began to take a few deep breaths and focus his attention to calming his heart rate-something he had been practicing in order to control his anxiety

There had to be a simple explanation-maybe you were just helping a friend...maybe they were for Neijire and not for you...you had said she was going to be visiting you today

But then-you had mentioned your period was uncharacteristically late since it hadn’t came yet...and you two had been active recently-crap he needed to get home right now

Tamaki is usually a very cautious driver, but today, he was borderline speeding

He was just too wrapped up in his thoughts, trying to convince himself that it was all a misunderstanding, that you weren’t pregnant and it was just his anxiety making situations seem worse than what they were

He was itching to call you, but he was afraid of the answer you would give him-what if you did truly think your were pregnant?

he didn’t want to work himself up so badly that he wasn’t even able to drive-

no, he was going to wait to talk to you in person, that was the best thing to do

He came into the driveway, parking his car quickly, his duffel bag with his change of clothes and personal belongings long forgotten in the trunk

As he was walking up to the front steps, his mind racing, he heard none other than Neijri greet him from behind

“Oh Tamaki-san, your home from work quiet early! Slow day out there?” She chirped a little too cheerfully

Tamaki noticed the plastic bag in her hand, making him gulp-oh no, it had to be for you then

Neijire stood in front of him awkwardly, not knowing what to do

“It’s wonderful to see you, but um, Y/n-san is going through some things right now...she asked me to help her while you were out patrolling-she didn’t want to worry you prematurely...”

Neijire gave him a reassuring smile, handing him the bag

Poor Tamaki was shaking, his head hanging low-was it all true then? We’re you really thinking you were pregnant?

“Y/n-san will explain everything, but whatever happens-I hope you both are happy!” She grinned, giving Tamaki a quick hug and a cheerful goodbye as she jogged to her own car

Tamaki shakily opened the front door, too terrified to look in the bag

You came bounding down the hallway, your hair tied back loosely

“Neijire, I can’t thank you enough for- Tamaki!” You gasped slightly, not expecting to see him in front of you

You instantly ran to him, noticing how pale he looked-he honestly looked like he would pass out

“Oh my god, are you okay?” You asked, your voice full of concern as you took the bag gingerly from his hands, sitting him on the couch

“Is it true?” He asked quietly, his voice timid, “that-that you think your-“

You sighed, taking his hand in yours. You had realized too late that you had sent the message accidentally to him, too terrified of his reaction to call him after the mistake

“Well, yes, I think I might be-be pregnant...but I don’t know for sure...theres really only one way to find out.” You gave him a small smile, trying to be reassuring

you were freaking out on the inside, but after seeing Tamaki look so terrified, you knew you had to be the one who was strong for the both of you

“I’m sorry for scaring you,” you apologized, your hand finding his, “ I didn’t mean to hide this from you, I just didn’t want to worry you unless I knew for sure,”

“I-It’s alright, I want to be here for you when you find out...I-it is potentially our child after all” he said quietly, rubbing his thumb against the soft skin of your hand

You gave him a quick kiss, smiling reassuringly as you let go of his hand, taking the bag Neijiri had gotten for you

“Well-lets go find out, shall we?”

Tamaki had waited outside the door as you went to the bathroom, coming in once you went to check the test

You were honestly too scared at that point to see, so you had asked him if he was up for checking it for you

He was terrified as well, but as he was waiting, he began to think about the situation-he wouldn’t mind having a child with you, he knew one day he wanted to settle down with you and make you his for the rest of his life

This would just be a step towards that, right? He loved you with all his heart, and couldn’t think of anybody else having a child with-apart of him was hoping for it to be positive, wanting nothing more to be a father to the life you two had potentially created

His hands were shaking as he took the test in his hands, seeing that there was two little lines, meaning you were, in fact, pregnant

Poor Tamaki’s emotions finally released, tears streaming down his face quietly as he hugged you close-you were so confused, but apart of you already knew the truth

You were now crying as well, both of you complete messes as you asked him repeatedly what the test said through hiccups

He just knelt down, kissing your stomach as his arms wrapped around your waist, hugging you close

Mirio

It was a pretty normal day for Mirio-he got up, did his usual work out routine, and then got himself ready to go on a date with you later on in the day

You two had decided to go get lunch at a quiet little cafe not to far from both of your apartments-you had also told him you had something “important” to tell him, which also kinda got him excited to here your news

He was hoping it was something positive, because when you had told him this over the phone the night before, you sounded pretty nervous, but wouldn’t reveal any other details

He drove into the parking lot of the cafe, instantly recognizing your car in the parking lot, making him smile

He found you at your favorite booth, looking down at your phone, until you looked up and smiled as you saw him walking over

He loved your smile, it was always so bright and beautiful-but something about it was different today...you almost looked nervous

He doesn’t pay too much attention to it, you did say you had news for him after all, maybe you just had some jitters

“Hey, sunshine, how are you?” He asks cheerfully, bringing you into a tight hug

“Well that’s strange,” he thought-you usually always squeezed him super tight, but today you almost kept him at a distance, like it hurt to hug him

He pulled away, staring at your face in worry-“You doing alright, babe?”

You shrugged off his worry quickly, not wanting to bring attention to it-“Oh it’s nothing, just-well, my chest has been a little tender but it’s fine,”

He knew something more was wrong, but as much as he wanted you to say what it was, he knew you’d tell him in your own time

The rest of the date went as your dates usually always went, you both talking happily about your lives with Mirio making you laugh occasionally

He did notice some things were different about you-you seemed to be really cautious of what you ate, asking if anything had caffeine or excess salt in the food. Your face, even when you laughed, was always somehow knitted with nervousness

He also noticed that your chest had been looking a little larger-he didn’t mind at all, he loved your body no matter what it looked like, it was just-strange to him. You also would sometimes rub your hands on your stomach below the counter, thinking he wouldn’t be able to see

It was all so peculiar to him-it made him really wonder what was going on that was making you act so differently

He reached his hand across the table, placing his larger hand in yours

“So-what exactly did you want to tell me?” He gave you a bright, reassuring smile, his heart aching slightly when you looked down at your lap

You looked so scared-were you okay? He started to get nervous himself-maybe something terrible had happened, like you were sick, or hurt

He just wanted you to tell him-whatever was going on, you would get through it together

He gave you a reassuring squeeze on your hand-“You know you can tell me anything, right?” He asked quietly, that bright smile still on his lips “Nothing you say is going to make me judge you or turn away from you-you can always trust me.”

He watched you take a deep breath, your ribs rattling slightly from the nerves

“Mirio-I-I...” you stuttered, “I’m pregnant-with your baby.”

Well SHIT HE DIDNT EXPECT THAT-

He may or may not have yelled out “Pregnant?!?” A little too loudly-he just wasn’t expecting that

After you shushed him to be a little more quiet, he lowered his voice some

“Whoa-pregnany-are-are you sure?”

You played with your fingers, the nerves still set in your system, “Yes, I-I has a feeling... some I may or may not have taken a whole box of tests a few days ago. And-and they all came back positive.”

“I’ve been wanting to tell you, I just didn’t know how or when or where- it was just so sudden.”

“I know we didn’t talk much about starting a family, Mirio, but,” you asked timidly, his hands still in yours, “what do you think about it?”

Mirio sat quietly for a few moments-he knew this was a huge thing, bringing in a child into this world. It was true you two hadnt talked a lot about starting a family, it wasn’t on either of your minds since you two were so young. But, he loved you too much to walk away from you and his child-it would be completely wrong for him to do so. He didn’t want to either-he loved you and this child you two had created.

His rough thumb brushed the skin of your hand, the sensation soothing to your nerves

“It’s all your decision y/n, but I love you-and this child we created. I’m would be excited to be a father!”

Shinsou

Also I’m tired and I’m pretty sure I spelt him name wrong THE ENTIRE TIME IM SORRY

You were wrapped up in Shinso’s body, your legs intertwining with his

His body was warm and comforting, his heart beating strong in his chest

You felt yourself beginning to wake up, soft sunlight flitting through the curtains of the room

It didn’t help either that your leg and inner thighs were killing you-you and Shinso were active quite a lot, but last night had seemed to really become a toll on your body

You groaned, snuggling yourself closer to him-he was so comfortable and gentle when he was sleeping

Shinsou seemed to had woken up slightly too, his hands petting your bed tossled hair

“You doing alright doll?” He asked huskily, he voiced still sounding sleepy

“Yeah,” you sighed, snuggling closer to him, “just-sore.”

“Aww you poor thing-but I didn’t here you complaining last night though,”He chuckled, placing a kiss on top of your head

You pushed yourself up, making yourself able to look into his lavender eyes as you laid your head on his bare chest

“Well I didn’t say that,” you said, giving him a cheeky smirk- “Just you gotta be a little gentle-I still need to be able to walk the next day,”

“Wheres the fun in that, kitten? You look so pretty when your a mess under me...”

Your cheecks instantly turned a beet red, a small smile tugging at your lips

Even though Shinso was making you a blushing mess, you instantly felt an uncomfortable feeling in your stomach, something you had been experiencing for a few weeks now

A burning sensation began to fill your throat, and to your horror, you felt yourself want to throw up

Shinso noticed your face pale as it turned from adorably embarrassed to terrfied

“Are you-“ he barely got out until you leaped off his body, stumbling to the bathroom

You barely got near the toilet before you began to empty the contents of your stomach into it

Shinso quickly followed you in, throwing on a pair of his boxers he had left on the floor from last night

His heart hurt hearing you sound so sick, your back heaving into the toilet-he softly grabbed your hair, rubbing soothing circles on your back

He was just so confused-you had seemed fine...you didn’t show any signs of being sick yesterday or last night-so why were you suddenly just throwing up like there was no tomorrow?

You finally had finished, laying your forehead on the cold seat

“What’s wrong doll-you okay?” He asked softly, brushing your hair with his fingers

You nodded numbly, feeling dehydrated and exhausted

“This has been happening-kinda a lot...” you croaked out, trying to clear the parch areas in your throat

Shinso stopped you from talking anymore, worried you would hurt yourself and went to go get you some water

He came back with a blanket and a bottle of water, you drinking in small sips as you sat on the blanket

“So-this is happening a lot, right?” He asked, watching to make sure the color came back to your face, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

You nodded your head numbly- “I-I was scared to tell you...because-well-“ you sighed nervously, looking down at the floor-“I also missed my period last week.”

It took Shinso to let that information set in-you missed your period? Why the hell would that matter? But then he began to connect the dots...you two had sex quite a lot....you were having morning sickness...you didn’t get your period-oh shit

He states it very bluntly, but stutters slightly over his words-“Your-your pregnant?”

“I-I don’t know for sure Shinso...but I have a feeling, just everything adds up to that,”

He’ll curse under his breath, sitting for a second in silence-that was such a huge piece of information for him to process

A baby was a big deal-you two were bringing in a new life into this world...he would be lying if he didn’t say he was terrified. It wasn’t under the best timing, you two never discussed having a child so soon...but he loved you. It was as much his baby as it was yours, and he would never just walk out of yours and his potential child’s life just because he was too scared.

He would do anything for you-that included welcoming this new child into the world with you

“Okay, I believe you y/n,” he’ll finally say, his bright purple eyes boaring into yours, “we’re having a baby. Let’s figure this out together, alright, kitten?”

—————-

HOLY CRAP THIS TOOK FOREVER SORRY

507 notes · View notes

whereisten · 5 years

Text

Cat and Mouse

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | more coming soon

Summary: You’re the daughter of an extremely well-known pastor. You’ve lived a quiet and sheltered life, that is until you meet and fall in lust with a gang leader they call the Grim Reaper.

Pairing: Gang Leader And Yandere!Taeyong X female reader (college student)

Genre: angst, SMUT, violence, if you squint there may be some fluff

Warnings: graphic and violent scenes described, mentions of religious practices (this in no way is meant to offend followers of Christianity), blood and death mention, gun and knife mention, profanity, toxic relationship, little alcohol use, drug addiction themes, stalking, manipulation, corruption kink, innocence kink, female masturbation, pet names, recording of sexual act, porn mention, oral sex (male and female), public sex, unprotected sex.

Word Count: 15.8K

(A/n: warning: Yandere Taeyong is extremely manipulative, he guilt trips and gaslights OC multiple times to get what he wants. This in no way represents the cute and kind Taeyong we really know. This gang leader is actually terrible lmao. TO the anon that requested this, THANK YOU for being so patient!! not my best,but I hope you like it!)

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It was just another Thursday night at home. Your parents left earlier that evening to go on a cruise to the Bahamas to celebrate their anniversary so you had the entire house to yourself.

Your father was a famous and wealthy pastor with money to afford an incredible mansion and luxury cars. Most people didn’t understand how someone that preached about humility and giving back to the less fortunate could live in a twenty bedroom house with a twelve car garage.

There was a certain irony behind it that pissed people off.

Taeyong was one of them. Taeyong and his gang had been watching the pastor, plotting for a robbery. He hated everything about religion and the fact that a man, such as your father, was capitalizing off of the hearts of devoted Christians irritated him. He wanted to take everything away from the pastor that lived in his community because he felt like he was the real criminal. Furthermore, your father never told you or your mother, but some of his wealth did come from his involvement in gangs and the drug trading that occurred in the community. He would use the churchgoers money to purchase large amounts of cocaine from other countries, then sell it on the black market at triple times the street rate. This was sold to business men that had money to spend and just needed their fix, regardless of the cost. The means at which they got their drugs was safer than getting it off the streets anyway. Your father funded the dark web website that almost functioned like the Amazon for drug trades, order today, get it tomorrow with “prime” shipping. Taeyong didn’t like that someone with a good reputation like your father had controlled such a large business. But he also didn’t like that his men were the ones that organized the deals on the website with little reward. They put their lives on the line to get it to these men, avoiding the police at all costs, but your father was behind on paying his workers by five months. Taeyong threatened him several times, but the pastor blocked his phone number and email. What he didn’t know was that Taeyong has access to all of his emails and text messages anyway, so he knew that your father would be gone on a twelve day cruise to the Bahamas. Taeyong took this as the perfect opportunity to drop by his house and well, “borrow” a few things. He knew that the pastor had a daughter, but what he didn’t know was that you’d be home from college for summer break. So there you are, flipping through channels, trying to find something to watch when you stumble across the late-night adult channels. Your thumb hovered over the “up” button as you watched a woman have sex with a man on a fluffy bed. Your eyes widened at how graphic it was. The blonde lady’s was making strange faces while the man held her legs and pushed into her.

You were a sheltered child, you didn’t even have your first kiss, so this was strange to you.

You had been taught the typical Christian rules of not having sex until marriage, but you wondered what it was like. You bit your lips and felt a certain warmth in between your legs that you couldn’t explain as you watched the TV.

You went to a Christian college, but many of the girls there had already lost their virginity and would talk about how they had sex with their boyfriends and touched themselves.

You didn’t even know what the girls at school meant when they talked about vibrators driving them crazy since their boyfriend couldn’t get them off. How could someone use a device to have sex when they were supposed to be in love with whoever touches that area? You’d think to yourself. But you were getting older and curiosity was killing you. You wanted to know about it, you wanted to rebel and feel what most of your friends felt all the time. If everyone can do it and still go to Heaven, why couldn’t you? The scene ended and the next thing you saw was a naked brunette laying on the bed, her back against a tall man. He rubbed his hands along her private area and then dipped two fingers into her. Your jaw dropped and your head turned, this had all looked strange and weird. You were so focused on the TV in your living room that you didn’t hear the front door open, nor the shuffling of several people in the large house.

You had forgotten to activate the security system for the night, so the cameras weren’t on and neither were the alarms. You were so used to being home alone that you never thought there’d be someone in it with you

You didn’t hear or feel a presence behind the couch. Taeyong stopped in the living room while his gang searched through the house for jewelry and a safe. He watched you and your facial expressions as you watched porn for the first time. He knew that you had no experience at all from the look on your face. You licked your lips and told yourself that it was time. You put your hand in your Rilakkuma pajamas and pressed your finger tips on your folds, you tried to mimic the way in which his fingers dipped in, but it was difficult. There was a weird wall that stopped you and a sharp pain that shot through you when you pushed too hard. You whimpered and opened your legs a little more on the couch, shifting in your seat to get comfortable. There had to be a way, you thought to yourself. Taeyong looked watching you. You were so innocent and cute. He liked the idea that a pastors daughter was trying to pleasure herself on the family couch. He smirked to himself at first, but was turned on by the sight of your widening legs and your moving hand. You had finally found the right spot and started to circle your fingers while pushing them inside you. You closed your eyes and furrowed your brows while you started to breathe harder. The feeling of your insides growing wet was weird, but good. Taeyong watches your mouth open and your head fall back on the couch, your soft, high pitched moans sounded like music to his ears. He had completely forgotten about why he was there. His brain became foggy and he licked his lips which were covered by the skull masks they always wore during robberies. You were unlike any girl he’d seen before, you were soft, pure and beautiful. You wiped the sweat forming on your forehead as you got closer with your other hand.

He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall behind the couch, still drinking in the wet sounds you made with your fingers and the loud groans you made. It was then that he felt his heart grow an attachment to you. He knew that he wanted to ruin you, pollute you, show you all the things that a sheltered Christian girl never knew about. The fact that you were the daughter of the pastor he despises was the icing on the cake.

He was breathing heavily as he watched you get off on your fingers.

He had a habit of becoming obsessed with things until he got them and eventually grew tired of them, and he knew that you’d become one of these things. He wouldn’t stop until you were his. His phone buzzed, interrupting his thoughts. It was a text from Haechan. Haechan: found the safe in the bedroom on the third floor, need a code. Taeyong smirked to himself. His boys always found things fast. Out of all the bedrooms in this extravagant house and they found the one with the safe in it. Brilliant. But now they needed a code.

Taeyong hadn’t found anything about a code in his emails or text messages. He thought of all the possibilities and closed his eyes. What was the code? Your moans still flooded his brain as he tried to focus and think hard so they could get out of there.

“Oh my God!” You cried out and his eyes flickered open.

You. It was you. He walked around the couch and stood in front of you while your eyes were still closed. You felt a presence in front of you and your eyes opened. You took your hand out of your pants quickly and screamed. A man with dark red hair and a terrifying skull mask stood over you and tilted his head.

He wore a black long sleeve shirt with a harness around it and black cargo pants tucked into black boots. You breathed heavily and held your head while closing your legs and pushing your body up on the couch. “Take whatever you want! I won’t tell anyone!” The man only stared at you and watched your eyes tear up. “Please, I don’t know why you’re hear but if it’s for money, I don’t have any and I don’t know where my dad keeps it. Please just let me live!” You begged. The man finally took his mask off and held it in his hand. He was unbelievably handsome. He had an eyebrow slit and a hoop in the center of his bottom lip along with several piercings in his ears. You could see the end of a long tattoo on his neck that led up to a jawline that he could certainly cut you with. His eyes were dark and striking. He was overall perfection. You felt the heat in your cheeks rise when he smiled down at you. “I’m sorry for interrupting, sweetheart, but I need something from you.” The man’s voice was deep and shook your body. You shook your head. Why would he let you see his face? Surely, he was gonna kill you after you gave him what he wanted. “I-I don’t have anything!” He stepped closer to you and held out his hand. “Stand up and give me your hand.” You did as he demanded and gave him the dry hand. He shook his head. “The other one. The one you touched yourself with.” You furrowed your brows. “N-no, I wasn’t touching myself!” You panicked and turned to the TV. “I was just..flipping through and-and I just stopped on this channel but I was gonna change it before your stopped me!” Taeyong only smiled wider and took your hand that you tried to hide. He held it up and looked at it before looking back to you. You tried to pull it away but he was stronger. He took your index and middle finger and put it in his mouth while looking into your eyes. You found it hard to look away, your mouth dropped as you felt his tongue lick in between and around your fingers. He took your fingers out and rubbed the tips along his lips while closing his eyes. “Mmmm..you’re just as sweet as I imagined.” You pulled your hand away and looked at the strange man. “W-What the hell is wrong with you?” Taeyong only smiled. He was about to say something when a voice called out from the hallway. “Taeyong! I don’t have any leads on the safe code!” There was another man with him. Taeyong looked to the hallway and was distracted for a split second, so you pushed him away from you and ran towards the other end of the house. Taeyong was caught off guard, but chuckled lightly while you ran. Johnny walked up beside Taeyong. “Who the fuck is that? And where’s your mask?” “The bastard’s daughter. She wants to play a game of cat and mouse.” Taeyong smirked. “Do you want us to kill her?” Johnny asked. “No, she’s mine. Bring her to me unharmed.” The rest of his men ran after you after Taeyong said that. You tried to find somewhere to hide, the front door was too far away and the patio was on the other side.. You cursed this house for being so big for no reason. You ran up the stairs and heard multiple footsteps follow you. You breathed heavily, dashing into a bedroom and locking the door. You stepped away from the door and looked around for an exit. You couldn’t jump out the window, you’d break your legs. Hiding in the closet wouldn’t help. You heard the door handle being fiddled with. They found you. “Open the door! We’re not gonna hurt you!” A voice yelled out. You panted and looked around. You looked above you and saw the vent. You glanced back at the door when you heard the man trying to break it down by slamming his body into it. You quickly lifted yourself up on the dresser below the vent and jumped up. You had to tip toe to pull the door of the vent open, but once you did, you raised your arms above your head and tried to pull yourself up into it. Thank God for the upper body strength you had. You were halfway inside when the door finally broke down and the men entered. “Hey!” The man ran up to you and grabbed your dangling legs. “No!” You cried out and tried to pull yourself away, but the man was too strong. You fell down through the hole and into the man’s arms. He also wore a skull mask, but was much larger than the man in your living room. You looked around and saw three other men surrounding you. Two of which had a bats in their hands. You couldn’t escape. “Don’t kill me please!” You cried out again. The tall man threw you on to the bed. “I would’ve killed you a long time ago if I wanted to, sweetie. But the grim reaper wants you alive.” “The who?” You scurried and held yourself up with your elbows behind you. “What do you want?” You cried out. Then you saw the red haired man calmly walk through the crowd of men in front of you. It was him, he was the grim reaper. You could tell because of the way he commanded the room as he walked in calmly and quiet;y, but still looked deadly.

His feline-like eyes narrowed in on you, making you feel small. “Oh little mouse, where you going?” He sat at the edge of the bed. “Don’t be scared.” He tried to calm you down. “I’ll make you a deal..” he started while wiping away a tear that ran down your cheek. “If you tell me the code..I’ll let you live and I won’t tell anyone, not even your father, what sin you committed tonight.” You cried and sniffled. “I..promise..I don’t know it.” Taeyong smiled wickedly. “I know you don’t know it..but what’s your birthday?” You were hesitant to share that information because if that was the code, your family would lose everything in that safety these strange men, but you couldn’t let your parents know that you touched yourself and committed such a tragic crime in a Christian household, they’d be so disappointed. You swallowed hard. “April fifteenth.” Two of the men ran out of the room while Taeyong smiled. “Thank you.”

He turned to the other men. “Leave us.” Once they left, he turned back to you. You jumped when he touched your leg. He took out a switch blade and you saw the twinkling reflection of a sharp knife. He ran it along your neck while you breathed heavily.

You shivered at the feeling of the cold blade on your skin. “What were you really doing little mouse, don’t lie to me and you might just live.” You exhaled and closed your teary eyes.

“Yes, I was watching porn..I-I’ve never had sex, I haven’t even touched myself before tonight..I feel like a loser and I wanted to know what it’s like. Please don’t kill me.” You were surprised to hear so much come out of your mouth to a complete stranger. But he made you nervous. “I see.” he glanced down to your lips. “Well, it would be a shame to kill you before you can experience this.” Taeyong almost pities you, the innocent and sheltered girl, while he drags the knife down your sweaty arm. “I’ll let you know my secret..my name’s Taeyong and those are my men. Your father pissed us off so we’re coming to take what’s ours.” He looked into your eyes before continuing.

“When they ask you what happened, tell them that you don’t know, you were out for ice cream and when you returned home, you saw that someone had broken in.” His low voice made your eyes widen. “I’ll let you live, and for tonight, we’ll take the money and jewelry. But I’ll be back for you, little mouse.”

You opened your mouth to ask what he meant but he put a finger on your lips. “Don’t tell anyone or I’ll kill your mother first, sweetheart. Nod like a good girl if you understand.” You nodded quickly and watched as the strange man took his finger away and left the room. You laid there, terrified and shaking. You listened to the men yelling and laughing as the destroyed the house. You heard glass break and paintings being destroyed while you cried. You got up slowly when you heard the shuffling stop and walked downstairs. The place was a mess, they not only ravaged through your place, but broke everything. Your father never made anyone upset. He made everyone happy and at peace with his sermons. How could he upset these men? What did he do? You pulled out your phone and called him. “Hello? Dad?” You sniffled. “I-I just came home..and there’s been a robbery.” You felt bad for lying to your parents but you had to, who knows what Taeyong would do if he found out you told the truth. Part of you was terrified by him, but another part was interested for some reason.

Was it the way he looked at you through lustful eyes and the power he commanded over the room? Or the fact that he lived a completely different lifestyle from you and was the typical “bad boy?” ————— A few weeks later and things return to normal. Your dad didn’t lose too much, and you found it weird that he wasn’t more upset than he was. But he claimed that he was just glad that you weren’t home when the savages came. The robbery made headlines and thousands of church guests donated to the rebuilding of your house and life. In public, your parents cried and thanked everyone endlessly, but in private they were all giggles. Something didn’t feel right, and the whole thing made you look at them differently. “Can you believe that we ended up with more than we lost?” Your dad laughed one evening when the three of you had dinner. “Yeah, the community really is amazing when they work together to help people.” You mom took a bite of her caviar. “Shouldn’t we give it back then?” You interrupted. Your dad wiped his mouth. “Now, why would we do that? This is a gift from God, we must embrace it and yes, we will use our voices and our power as role models in the community to help others, but we need not put the money we’ve been given back out there. This is all for a greater cause, y/n.” You nodded and looked back at your salad. ————— The weeks following the robbery felt weird. You always felt like someone was watching you. Taeyong’s dark gaze was both alluring and terrifying and the fact that he had watched you touch yourself only made you more paranoid. You were embarrassed, yes, but he made you feel..sexy about it. It was a strange feeling and you didn’t understand why part of you liked it. Taeyong was watching you. He would watch you as you went to dinner with your parents or shopped in Target. He was always there. He couldn’t let you go, and he knew he needed more. Your purity and soft expressions contradicted everything about himself, that’s why he liked you. And to see you being curious about sexual feelings sent him overboard. You had everything he didn’t have, in terms of wealth and status, but he also had experiences you’d never dreamt of. He knew ways in which to shatter your perfect world and innocent nature. He’d sit on his motorcycle and watch you skip around in your cute plaid skirts, frilly knee highs and button up blouses and all he could think about was how badly he wanted to ruin you. You are simply being yourself and living a life free of worries and sin, and he wanted to change that. One day when you went to tennis practice, he decided to watch you play. He wanted to hurt the tennis coach when she hit you with a high speed tennis ball on your thigh. You cried out and dropped to the floor, but the coach only scolded you for being too slow.

It took everything in him to not pull his gun out. Nonetheless, you got up and tried harder.

He felt the heat in his chest rise as he watched your glistening and sweaty skin peak out from under your white tennis skirt and on the tops of your breasts in your sports bra.

You were breathing heavily, your mouth was swollen from you biting your lips while you played intensely, your eyes dark and low, and you drank so much water, some droplets escaped and dripped down your chin and neck. His impure thoughts drove him wild and he knew he had to talk to you again. And so, when you walked home after he practice, he cornered you. You smiled and thanked the barista at Starbucks for your drink before turning to head out the door.

The tennis court was only a few blocks away from your house so you decided to walk home while drinking an iced caramel macchiato, probably not the best choice for post-workout session, but it made you happy. You sucked your straw while looking at your phone, but when you left the Starbucks you heard a voice call out to you. “Do you think Serena drinks caramel macchiatos after practice?” The low voice said. You slowly turned to see who it was. Your eyes widened. It’s him, the red haired man that broke into your house now leaned against the wall and eyed you up and down. You suddenly felt naked in your tight tennis uniform. You nearly dropped your drink as you stepped back slowly. “W-What are you doing here?” “What? A gang leader can’t enjoy a drink from Starbucks?” He took a long sip of his iced coffee while watching you intensely. “Were you watching me?” “I told you I’d be back, little mouse.” He walked closer to you.

“Take a ride with me.” He tilted his head to a motorcycle that stood beside the sidewalk.

You looked at it, then back at him. He wore a red high collar shirt and black jeans ripped at the knees. A pair of round sunglasses on his face made him look cool and relaxed. It was incredibly hot outside but he still wore dark clothing and black boots. The worst part was that you felt an aching in your chest at the sight of his toned arms, tattoos and piercings. “I-I have to go home.” Taeyong raised his slit eyebrow and threw his empty cup away.

He smirked. “It wasn’t a question. Get on.” What could you do? The man surely would’ve killed you if you ran away. So you let him help you get on his motorcycle. Nervous but eager to see where he was taking you. You got on and held onto his small waist.

To your surprise, Taeyong took you to the summer fair. “The fair? Really?” You looked up at the big sign above you as you two walked in. Taeyong didn’t pay, he only brushed past the guards and ticketing workers as he nodded at them. “What are we doing here? And how did you get us in for free?” You asked all the important questions but Taeyong only smirked and chuckled. “So many questions..” He took your hand in his and took you to the first rollercoaster he saw. “I’ve been meaning to visit this place, but never had someone to go with.” Taeyong watched your face as you looked on the intimidating rollercoaster. He saw your worried eyes and slightly parted lips, the way your hands gripped the metal barricade in front of you as you waited to be called on. “Are you nervous?” He asked, his tone a bit softer. You turned to him and looked into his concerned eyes. “Why do you care? It’s not like I can back out without you killing me.” Taeyong’s smile dropped and he put a hand on your shoulder.

“Oh, little mouse, you don’t need to be worried about that, I’d never kill you..” He stepped closer and your breathing stopped as he looked down on you with those sharp, magnetic eyes.

“But I will make you suffer endlessly...by forcing you to go on a rollercoaster.” His straight face turned into a bright smile as he winked. He was confusing. Scary at some points, but attractive at other times. And his words made no sense, was he messing with you?

And why didn’t you call the police or your parents? What was this control Taeyong had over you? You brain screamed danger but your heart was being pulled in. You wanted to know what a dangerous lifestyle was like for once. You wanted to stop living a “simple” life.

He watched you the entire ride, laughing as you screamed during the long dips and swift turns. You looked at him and hit his side with a small fist.

“Hey! It’s not funny.” You went on the Twister and a few other rides with him, laughing and smiling at each other like a regular couple. He even used his shooting skills to win you a Hello Kitty plush bear.

No one would’ve known that you were brought there against your will, or that the crazy man was a gang leader. He took your hand in his as you walked to the food truck area. “How’s your leg?” “Wait, you saw that?” You held your head with your other hand, too focused on the question to notice the strange way you two walked together holding hands. You looked up at him but he only looked forward, avoiding your gaze. “I like you, little mouse, and we both know you have never had a boyfriend, right?” The question nearly made you stop walking. “N-no.” You whispered, a bit embarrassed that you, a college student, never dated someone. Taeyong smiled to himself. Perfect. Everything was falling in line for him. “Well, little mouse, that’s what people do when they like someone, they’re always there to watch and support their significant other. How would I know that you were hurt and needed some fun if I didn’t stalk you a little?” Something didn’t feel right, but Taeyong’s eyes were softer as he talked to you, he rubbed a hand on your arm and gave you a small smile.

Why did part of you want to trust him? Was it because you knew nothing about love and how people show it? Taeyong was teaching you more than anyone else did about relationships and you appreciated that.

So you brushed off the bad feeling you had and looked down at your thigh. “Well, I do have a bruise, but I’ll be fine. Thank you for taking me here.”

You were surprised that he cared, but you didn’t think it weird that he was there watching you in the first place.

He only smiled and took your hand again. “I’m glad you appreciate my efforts, you can make it up to me later.” He winked. You were in line for a smoked turkey leg, and you wanted to know more about the strange man in front of you that suddenly couldn’t stop smiling.

“Okay but why me?”

Taeyong didn’t shuffle through his wallet for cash like everyone else did. He only clicked his tongue and waited for the chef to nod. He turned back to you. “Because you’re the only girl I have my eyes on..because I feel bad for breaking into your parents’ place.” You scoffed and furrowed your brows. “Oh really? You think this makes up for that?” “Come on, y/n, you and I both know your parents made even more than they lost. So in a way, I kinda helped you guys.” His eyes never let go of you while he bit into the turkey leg and chewed a large chunk of it. You rolled your eyes and couldn’t help but smile. How did things end up this way? Who was this man? “Are you happy you came with me?” He asked with a full mouth. “I had a good time, but I still don’t understand what you want from me.” You looked around nervously. He swallowed hard and handed you the leg. “Have you ever had a smoked turkey leg?” You shook your head. “No.” He scoffed. “Try it.”

You took a bite out of the leg and your eyes widened at the explosion of flavor. It was so good, it tasted cheap, yes, but the Smokey flavor was unlike anything you’d ever had.

“There’s so much..that you haven’t experienced yet..I just want to show you the world you don’t know, will you let me do that?” You nodded without thinking it through. What was the catch? “Yes, my parents have kept me sheltered and protected, and..I’m embarrassed to say I don’t know about most things..that the average person knows about.” You went on a tiny rant, but Taeyong already knew this.

He was captivated by the way you chewed and how your round cheeks filled up with even the tiniest bites of food. Your round eyes dazzled in the sunlight and your lips formed a small pout. He couldn’t hold himself back any longer. “Have you ever kissed anyone?” You looked down and were about to shake your head but Taeyong lifted your chin with his free hand and leaned down to your face. The handsome man placed a long kiss on your lips while your eyes were wide open. This was all so sudden, but you didn’t pull away. You liked it, you had finally been kissed. When he raised his head you looked up at him innocently. “W-What was that?” “I’m sorry, I had to.” He stepped closer to you and gave you a questioning look. “Do you like me, y/n?” You had just gotten to know this man and he was already asking if you liked him. Your sheltered and nervous mind screamed ‘no’ at first, but damn it you wanted to do something different.

You wanted to live like everyone else did. You felt things you never felt before in your short time with Taeyong and you weren’t sure if it was love, but you knew it was different.

Taeyong was probably not the best choice for your first “love,” the man was a killer and leader of a dark life, but you wanted to experience everything he was willing to show you. So, you dove in.

“Yes.” You nodded and looked into his eyes. He smirked. “Then you should kiss me back, but open your mouth this time.” You were hesitant, but Taeyong leaned down to you and kissed you again. This time, you felt his tongue on your lips. You slowly opened your mouth and felt it enter. He held your head in his hands as he turned his own and found your tongue. You lifted it and felt your eyes shut while you enjoyed this new feeling. He guided the kiss, playing with your tongue and licking your lips whenever he pulled away to breathe.

You loved the feeling and put your arm around his neck to pull him back towards you. Your chest rose up and down rapidly while you kissed him and his hands found your waist. He brought you closer to his hot body as you placed a hand on his chest lightly. Taeyong felt light headed when you were close to him like this. The feeling of your soft, round lips finally on his made his heart flutter. You were all his. He couldn’t think of anything but you. When you pulled away from him you looked up to see him biting his lips and blushing. “You did so well. Did you like that?” He held your chin and rubbed it with his thumb. “Yes.” That was all you could say as you thought of how good his lips and tongue felt on yours. Everything felt magical during the sunset. The lights behind his head and the gathering of more people around you. Everything felt warm. Then, reality set in.

“It’s getting dark, I have to go home.” He nodded and took your hand. “Let’s go.” You were walking past the tables by the food trucks as Taeyong held your hand. A man sitting at one of the tables stuck is foot out at the last second, making your trip and fall halfway down before Taeyong caught you and held you up. The men laughed and looked at your skirt, trying to catch a glimpse of your underwear. You both turned to them while you brushed yourself off. “Sorry dear..” the man started. “but I suggest wearing shorts next time.” The man and everyone at his table burst into laughter while you felt the heat in your cheeks rise. Taeyong came up behind you and stepped in front. The man looked up and wiped his teary eyes.

“Oh look, it’s the grim reaper himself. I’m sorry for tripping your angel of a girlfriend.” He rolled his eyes. Taeyong was silently boiling. How dare someone touch you and laugh at you. He tilted his head before placing both hands on the table. “Which hand do you use to play with your dick, you fat piece of shit?” Taeyong’s words made you jump as the man raised an eyebrow. He scoffed, “I use both when I’m fucking your girlfriend.” The man let out but before he could take another breath, Taeyong took a knife out from his waist band and stabbed the man through the center of his hand that rested on the wooden table. You covered your mouth and backed away as the blood spewed out from the man’s hand and he screamed out in pain. People nearby screamed too and ran away. Blood decorated Taeyong’s face while the other guys sitting at the table jumped up and ran.

The man tried to take Taeyong’s hand off of the knife so that he could remove it, but he forced the mans hand away and pulled out another shiny knife, stabbing that hand and pinning the man to the table again.

More blood spewed onto Taeyong’s face as he laughed. But he didn’t stop there. He dragged the first knife through the man’s hand and up his wrist, cutting it in half with the sharp blade.

“Oh God!! NO!! Stop!! HELP!” The man cried out but no one helped him. Everyone was gone and the food truck workers only shook their heads as they watched. “You’re right, I am the grim reaper.” Taeyong leaned in close to the man’s face and looked him in the eyes with a menacing expression.

“And guess what? No one can help you. Not even God.” Taeyong said before slicing through his other arm. The man stood up and bled profusely before passing out and falling onto the dirt. You didn’t notice that you started crying in fear. “T-Taeyong?” How could the man you just kissed moments ago become so violent? Was this who he really was? He turned to with a bloody face and smiled.

“Don’t cry, little mouse, he had it coming.” He walked up to you and tried to hold you with his bloody hands but you stepped back. “Why?” You shook your head as tears fell. “Because I like you! Because he hurt you! Don’t be afraid of me.” He started but you couldn’t stand to be around him, everything felt so wrong. You were hit with the reminder of who he was.

He wasn’t some sweet gentleman here to show you the beauty of the world, he was a bad person that only knew the dark sides of it. You turned and ran away from him, pushing through the crowd to try to get as far as possible. He would’ve followed you but he knew that it was too much for you. If he had just controlled his anger, he could’ve had his boys handle the man, but he didn’t. He was used to the violence, but he had to give you time. ———— A few weeks past and you didn’t text Taeyong even when he asked you out for lunch. You were scared of him, but part of you missed the feeling he gave you when he was nearby, looking at you fondly, watching your every move. You brushed off your thoughts and visions of him and walked into the practice room for your piano lesson. You always went to piano practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but on this visit, your piano teacher wasn’t present in the choir room you used for your lessons. “Hello?” You called out and looked around “It’s just you and me, little mouse.” “What are you doing here?” Your eyes wide when you recognized the mans voice.

“Well, you didn’t text me back, so I had to come see you.” He stood in the corner of the room with his arms crossed, this time he wore a gray long-sleeve that clung to his arms. He looked irritated, like he hadn’t slept for days. “Don’t worry, I’ll forgive you if you play something for me.” He stepped closer, but your gripped the strap of your backpack and baked away. “Forgive me for what? You nearly killed a man! What did you expect me to do?” He laughed. But slammed a hand down on the piano. You jumped at the sound. “I expect you to thank me for standing up for you!”

His voice was loud and husky, his dark eyes looked up at you. You wore a pink short skirt that rested above the middle of your thighs with a thin white button down shirt tucked into it. And of course, those frilly white knee-highs that he loved. “How could you leave me?” He stepped closer to you, making you back into the door of the practice room. You didn’t know what to say, he did defend you even though he scared you. “Don’t you understand that I did that for you? I could’ve been arrested.” Taeyong moved a strand of hair from your face.

You looked up at his lips innocently. You forgot about everything. The only thing you thought about was the feeling of them on you.

You leaned in and kissed him first this time. You missed the feeling and closed your eyes while moaning out lightly.

Taeyong kisses you hard this time, biting your lips before pulling away and kissing your neck. He held your body close to his, focusing on your moans and heavy breathing. But he had to hold himself back, he wasn’t ready to take you yet. He wanted you to beg for him. He took your hand and led you back to the piano. “Sit and play a song for me. Don’t mess it up.” He demanded as you sat down and flipped the pages to the song you had practiced with your teacher.

You gulped, worried for what might happen in you made a mistake.

He sat beside you and you started to play Piano Sonata No.24 by Beethoven. Despite your hands being shaky, you put your fingers on the keys and played. You started off well but jumped a bit when Taeyong breathy voice entered your ears. He whispered “I remember when I first saw you, you were touching yourself, isn’t that right, little mouse?”

You nodded, and stared straight ahead at the sheet music, finding it difficult to focus on the piece.

“Do you really want to know what it’s like?” He continued. You nodded and your breath hitches in your throat as his large, cold and bruised hands run up your thigh. The touch of his hand on your thighs makes you feel a heat between your legs, much like what you felt that night.

He stops his hand and runs his gun along the inner skin on your thigh instead, running it all the way up to your private area. You gasp at the feeling of a weapon being so close to your core, but Taeyong whispers again and drags the pistol back down to your knee. “Keep playing.” You continued, but missed a beat and picked your hands up off the piano. He inches the gun up your thigh but you continue with the song. A few bars later and you mess up again. He pulls the gun up further. You can’t stop skipping notes and playing incorrect rhythms until the gun finally touched your aching core. You pull your hands away and look at Taeyong who is focused on the device between your legs. “I’m sorry, please don’t kill me.” You beg. “Oh sweet girl, I already told you I’m not gonna kill you. You can leave whenever you want to, unless..you don’t want me to stop?” He whispers and continues to rub the gun against your folds.

You grip the piano tightly and shake your head. Everything felt wrong, how could an inanimate object make you feel this way?

“It’s okay, relax.” Taeyong’s deep voice and closeness calmed you down, and you felt the need to embrace this new feeling. You needed to know what others talked about when they talked about sex. “Close your eyes. Focus on the feeling.” He whispered into your neck. His hot breath pushed you along further.

You do as he says and breathe heavily, gasping at the strange, but good feeling you start to have. The cold metal pressing against you through your underwear makes you wet. “Does it feel good? Do you like the feeling of my gun on you, little mouse?” You sigh and nod, biting your lips and grunting as you start to rock your hips. “Why does it feels so good?” “This is what it’s like...I’m gonna make you cum for the first time, sweetheart.” His deep voice echoes in your head. He watches your lips part and your mouth fall open and feels the restraint in his pants. You moan a few more times as he kisses your neck and you move your wet opening against his gun on your own. He listens to your moans get louder, but before you can cum, he removes the gun and stands up from the stool, taking a few steps back and looking down on you as you still sat and breathed heavily, your forehead sweaty and your lips open. “Now, follow my orders, be a good girl.” You nodded, saddened by the withdrawal of his gun for some reason. “Put your hand on your pussy.” He smirked. You shakily lowered your hand. “How does it feel?” “It’s wet..and warm.” You breathily answered. He smiled. “Good, now turn to me and put one leg on each side so that your legs are open, and put your hands out in front.” You moved as he said and jumped slightly at the feeling of the cold leather in between your legs. He put his gun away and took out a switch blade, running it against your thighs, the sharp knife made you chilly. “Lift your skirt and lean back a little, sweetheart.” You moved again as he looked into your eyes while running the blade across the delicate skin of your inner thigh. You bunched your skirt up around your waist as he licked his lips and moved closer. You watched and breathed heavily, unsure of what he’d do next. “My gun made you so wet already, little mouse.” His mouth turned upward into a smirk as he looked at your soaking panties. He used the knife to cut the waist band of your panties and dragged the fabric from under you, making it so that your bare flower was against the smooth leather. “Now, slide forward and backward.” You leaned forward and started to rock your hips back and forth again, but Taeyong wasn’t pleased that you were barely touching the seat. He placed two hands on your shoulders and pressed you down. “Keep moving, yes, just like that little mouse.” He stepped back again.

Your eyes closed as you focused on the feeling and the strange building of liquid under you. You placed your hands in front of you and leaned forward so that your clit rubbed against the chair.

Something was building up in your stomach, you weren’t sure what it was. The aching in your clit made you cry out quietly in the studio. You looked up to see Taeyong recording you with his phone from two feet away. “Unbutton your bra.” “Like this?” You looked up at Taeyong innocently while unbuttoning the top three buttons and still moving back and forth. He nearly lost it when he saw your large eyes through the phone screen. “Yes, sweetheart, and take your boobs out of your bra.” You still held your body as it moved back and forth with one hand in front, but took your boobs out of your bra just like he told you to. “Ah! Cold..” you hissed at the cold air that hugged your breasts once you picked them out. “My nipples..they’re so firm and hard, is that supposed to happen?” Your high pitched and confused voice made Taeyong chuckle. He bit his lips as he watched your boobs jump up and down while you fucked yourself on the stool. “Yes, little mouse, that’s a good thing. Now, move faster.” You swallowed hard and picked up the pace while still holding your breasts. The sounds of your wet entrance against the leather covering filled the air.

You felt weird and raw. You bit your lips to hold back the sounds that wanted to escape your chest. The plush surface of the stool against your folds drove you crazy. How could something so simple make your chest so weak? “Open your mouth, let it out, the louder you are the better you will feel.” Taeyong demanded while still recording you. Your mouth fell open and you were happy to see Taeyong’s approval. Your whines grew louder as your pace increased automatically. “Do you like fucking yourself on the stool?”

You bit your lips and nodded, the strange heat building made your head spin. “Look at the camera and say it, tell me what you’re doing with your sweet pussy.” You opened your eyes and looked the phone. “I’m f-fucking myself with the leather s-seat of a stool.” The words barely left your mouth before the high pitched moans escaped.

“Oh—oh my God.” You whimpered You let go of your boobs and used your both hands in front of you move faster and further down onto the stool.

Taeyong’s pants felt extremely restrictive as he grew. The sight of you slowly losing your innocence made him weak. Your skin was glistening with sweat, your chest moved fast and your full lips stayed open while you cried out the sweetest sounds he’s ever heard. “Good girl, are you going to cum?” He huskily let out. “I-I dont know..everything feels weird. But it feels good..” You whined and moaned loudly. “What feels good?” Taeyong’s calm voice let out. “My pussy..it’s feels so good, Taeyong.” You shut your eyes tightly and moved a few more times before you felt the sudden tremble of your core under you. Your boobs jumped and your legs fell weak as you came. Your eyes rolled in the back of your head as your jaw tensed. Taeyong loved every second of it and was glad to get it on camera. Your mouth still open as you moved slowly and came down, he thought of how your lips would look around his dick. But this was enough for today. “Good girl, you came.” Taeyong got up and rubbed your cheek. “Get up.” He helped you up off the stool. “Look at that, little mouse, look at how wet you are.” You looked down and saw the leather completely covered in the liquids that escaped you. “Why is it like that?” Taeyong laughed. “It’s good...” He took your hand as he stood behind you and brought it down to your core. “Do you feel that?” His fingers over yours as he pushed them in between your folds. “Yes” You nodded, still shaken up by your orgasm. Taeyong’s hot breath on your neck made you weaker. “A wet pussy is a good pussy” Taeyong let go and you were saddened by the withdrawal. “Now, little mouse..before our next lesson, I want you to suck a few lollipops.” He looked at your lips. “When’s our next lesson?” You asked, eager to see him again for some reason. You had completely forgotten about why you were upset with him, what he had done.

He was helping you get over your sexual awkwardness and you liked that, even if it was coming from a gang leader. That was all you cared about. He made you feel good and now you wanted more. “A little impatient aren’t we? Don’t worry, sweetheart, I’ll find you.” He winked and left you alone in the now quiet studio. ———— Taeyong goes about his daily life of crime, but still can’t get his mind off of you He’d have sex with other girls he’d meet at the nightclub his gang controlled but nothing compared to the sight of you. He’d try to get off on the girls as they danced for him but nothing worked, he couldn’t get hard and cum if he didn’t think about your body and the way you moved it on the leather chair.

He pictured your lips and heard the echoing sounds of your high pitched whimpers and moans. When he was alone, he’d get high and watch the video of you on his phone. He’d touch himself as he watched and feel completely blissful as he came while higher than the clouds. But he knew he needed more, he needed another fix. It had been two weeks but he couldn’t shake the thought of you out of his head. When he robbed people, he thought of you. When he killed people, he thought of your innocent eyes. He had to see you. Taeyong goes to watch you play tennis again but you still didn’t know. He liked the way you sweat and move.

So he decides that it’s time for your second lesson.

He waits for you at home, creeping into your bedroom through your window. He saw your parents cars in the driveway so he knew they were home. While waiting in your bedroom, he syncs his phone with your TV so he can play the video he took of you when you get out the shower. He starts to play the video, his head falling back against the headboard while he watches your innocent expressions on the screen. That’s when you came out of the bathroom attached to your room. You clutch your towel around you tightly and jumped in surprise when you saw the man on your bed. “H-how did you get in here?” Taeyong smiled. “Nice to see you too.” You heard panting and light moaning and turned to the TV.

Your eyes widened, it was you in your white blouse moving up and down the leather seat in the practice room. You had completely forgotten that Taeyong had taken and kept the video on his phone. “This isn’t good, you should delete that.” You turned back to him and pointed at the screen. “Oh, little mouse, I kept it so you can remember how good you felt.” You looked back at the screen and your jaw dropped at how you looked like a porn star. “Don’t be embarrassed, sweetheart, come here.” Taeyong patted your bed. You turned to him and walked slowly, still holding your towel around you. “Do you trust me?” He asked as he looked up at your exposed collar bones and the water droplets that dropped from your wet hair. You pouted and looked away. “I don’t know.” “Do you want to feel good again? Look at me.” He touched your hand as you looked back at the gorgeous man. “..yes.” He smiled slowly. “Come here. Get on the bed.” You still held your towel and climbed on the bed, kneeling over his lap as he massaged your thighs. Your moans on the TV echoed in the back of your head. “Listen...you sound beautiful.” Taeyong’s voice was dark and low. He rubbed his hands along the soft skin of your hips, lifting up the towel. He pressed his thumbs on the skin and bit his lips. “I want you to ride my face, little mouse.” You gasped. “You what?” “Ride my face, move just like you did on the seat.” Taeyong worked his hands to your waist. “I’m gonna make you feel good.” You nodded, he pushed himself further down your bed so that his face replaced his lap. You still held the towel as you hovered over him, hesitant to show him your naked body.

“Let me see all of you, please.” His hot breath fanned your sensitive skin, making you tremble in his hands. You nodded and dropped your towel. “Good girl, now lower yourself onto me.” He made you so weak with his husky voice. His hands gently pushed you down towards him and you started to move when you felt his plush lips against your folds. He sticks his tongue in between them, giving you one long stripe as you start to move back and forth. Your breath stays in your chest and you hold onto the headboard for support as your weak and incredibly sensitive to the feeling of his hot tongue on you. Taeyong marvels at the sight do your body above him, the roundness of your breasts, the way your nipples stuck out from the pillowy soft skin, and the beauty of your untouched pussy on his mouth. He lays his tongue flat while you move, kissing your clit every now and then to send shockwaves through your body. He likes to see how jumpy you are at the new feeling.

But he pulls you down towards him whenever you push up away from him, forcing your legs further apart so you had to lower yourself. “Taeyong—“ You breathily call out his name and let your head fall back, while still rocking your hips back and forth. Taeyong hums and dips his tongue inside to give you more. His tongue laps up the juices between your folds and moves from your clit to your dripping opening. You nearly lose it as he explores your pussy with his mouth, moaning and crying out while you get closer to cumming. Taeyong digs his thumbs into your waist, making you yelp out in the unexpected and bruising pain.

“Quiet down, sweetheart, we don’t want your parents to hear, isn’t that right?” Taeyong’s raspy voice lets out. You nod amd shut your lips tightly, trying to prevent any sound from getting out. You move faster, gripping hard onto the headboard while Taeyong passionately circles his tongue around your clit and along your folds. He moves a hand to your clit and runs circle around it slowly while sticking his tongue deep inside you. This new feeling of the combined attacks on your core makes you go crazy, you can’t hold back anymore and cry out his name loudly. “Taeyong!” He slaps your ass hard with his other hand, making you jump. You put a hand over your mouth as Taeyong brings you to the edge with his mouth, moaning into it as tears start to form.

You moved back and forth a few more times before cumming. You tried to lift yourself off of his face as you came but he used his large, veiny hands to force you back down onto him.

You shake uncontrollably and look down at him while he holds you still, your mouth falling open in a silent ‘O’ shape.

He licked everything up while looking you in the eyes. He was so hard, he wanted to fuck you until you moaned so loudly, your parents would think you were being attacked, but he knew he couldn’t. Not tonight.

He finally lets you go and you fall down on the bed beside him, exhausted and weak with the a tired feeling in your legs. He wipes his mouth with the bath towel and leans over you.

“You were such a good girl for me, baby.” He kissed your forehead while you smiled. “That was amazing.” You let out. Taeyong sat up and flipped channel while you looked at the ceiling blissfully. “There’s a video I wanted you to see.” Taeyong turned to you and held your hand.

You sat up straight and looked at the TV. The video features a man dressed as a priest and a woman dressed as a nun.

“Why are we watching this?” You ask as Taeyong rubs small circles on your back. At first it seems like an innocent video of people in a church, but then you see what it really is.

The nun undressed like the priest tells her too then gets on her knees. You gasp as you watch the nun open her mouth for the priest and gives him a blow job in the church. “Is this real?” “Yes” Taeyong lies, they’re just actors but he doesn’t want you to know that. You gasp at the sight. “Isn’t this..wrong?” Taeyong chuckles at how naive you are. “No, little mouse, they are in love, So this isn’t wrong..now, watch closely.” You observe the way the lady’s head bobs up and down, and how she takes the priests entire length in her mouth. Your head turns and you wonder how it’s possible at a to fit so much in one’s mouth. “If you’re a good girl like she is, you’ll be rewarded greatly.” Taeyong watches your wide eyes on the TV. He gets up and sits on the edge of the bed. He could’ve just laid on the bed and had you between his legs while he rested his back against the headboard, but having you under him on the floor would feel so much more..satisfying. He takes your hand and gets you off the bed. “Get on your knees and be a good girl for me.” You look up at him while he rubs his thumb over your bottom lip. He unzips his jeans and takes his erect dick out. the size is intimidating, not as large as the man’s in the video, but you’re still not sure how you could fit all of him in your mouth. “What’s wrong, baby?” He asks once he sees your sad expression. “I’m not sure..if I love you, Taeyong.” Taeyong smiles and laughs lightly, still moving his hand up and down his member, circling around shaft and spreading the pre cum over it. He had built himself up so much, just the sight of you below him would make him cum hard if he kept moving his hand. But he wanted to feel your pretty mouth on him badly. “Well..do you hate me?” You shake your head. “No, no I don’t, Taeyong.” “And what is the opposite of hate?” Taeyong raises an eyebrow. “Love.” The word barely leaves your mouth. Taeyong is addicting, you can’t push away from him even though the small voice in your head tells you to.

He’s a criminal, someone that lives a completely different lifestyle from you and hurts others. He went against everything you were taught, he was dangerous, but you liked that.

“See, baby, I love you so much I tasted you and fucked you with my mouth.” The words sounded sexy as they left his mouth.

“but if you want to prove that you love me, you should take me in, all of me. Do you understand why we must do this now?” Taeyong intertwines his other hand with yours, his eyes large and focused on your soft face. “Yes..”

He was surprised to feel a small pain in his cold heart after he lied to you, but he brushed it away. He wasn’t capable of providing love. He only fucked well and got people to do things for him with that manipulative mouth of his. Love was never an option. “Good.” He smiles. “Now, open your pretty mouth.” He moves his hand up and down his shaft as you hover over it, a heat growing in between your legs again as you remember what the couple on the TV did. “Do it just like she did for Father. You want to be a good girl, right?” “Yes, Taeyong.” You lick your lips and put your mouth on his tip. You do as he says. Doing your best to follow what the girl in the video does, and lower your mouth onto him, taking in as much as you can.

There’s a harsh feeling in your throat as you feel you’ve taken in all you can, but you push even further. You had to be good, you had to make him feel as good as he made you feel. You gag and take him all in, your eyes squinting at the pain in your throat. You pull your mouth off and let your spit drop back onto his tip as you choke.

When you pull away you look up at him with large eyes and ask “Like this?”, Taeyong grunts.

“Yes, just like that, think of it as those lollipops you had this week.” Taeyong smirks and pushes your head back down. “Stick your tongue out.” Taeyong demands through dark eyes. You do as he says and he guides his tip on your tongue. “Lick it, little mouse.”

And so you do, you lick all around it and in between the small part at the top. You moved your head so your tongue can cover all bases while you place kitten licks on his veiny dick.

“Does it feel good, Taeyong, am I a good girl?” You work your tongue around the shaft as he throws his head back and holds back his loud groans. Your kitten licks drove him crazy “Yes, baby, you’re perfect, now swallow.” He looks back down at you and pushes the back of your head. You feel his dick hit the back of your throat and struggle to breathe as you bob your head up and down. “Yes, sweetheart, just like that.” You move your head up and down like the lady in the video did, drinking in Taeyong’s glorious moans. He looks down at your naked body while you gag and tears start to fall down your perfect face.

You pull away for a brief moment to breathe, and Taeyong watches as a string of spit and his pre cum fall onto your breasts and your chin. “Just a little longer, I’m almost there.” He pants. You look up at him innocently and nod before moving back down onto it. Taeyong grabs your hair and thrusts into your mouth, forcing your head down so that your lips and tongue touch every inch as he gets closer.

You groan as your throat becomes raw and irritated at the continued attack, but the vibrations make Taeyong go crazy.

You don’t even move your head anymore as Taeyong fucks into it. Your eyes start to water, your knees grow tired on the cold, hard floor.

“Fuck” he whispers as he gets closer.

You tap his thigh to tell him you can’t breathe, but he forces himself into your mouth with one hard thrust and you feel a hot liquid coat the back of your irritated throat.

He’s still holding the back of your head so you can’t pull away and see his release. “Swallow it.”

He groans and curses as he comes in your mouth.

You’re completely ruined as your tears stain your red cheeks and your nose runs. He finally lets go of your head and watches you swallow hard.

“It hurts.” You whined as you look up at him and wipe your chin of his cum. “I know, baby, but you did so well.” He picks you up off the floor. “you were such a good girl.” He sits you on his lap and cleans your face up with the bath towel before laying you down. He zips his jeans up and turns off the TV.

“Now you know what it feels like. Doesn’t it feel good?” He asks as he wipes your face. He doesn’t lay down with you, he only sits on the side of your bed while watching you. “Can I know..what the actual thing feels like?” You look down at his pants, eager to feel him inside you.

Taeyong chuckles and his smile makes your heart shutter. His beautiful large eyes squinted. “You will, little mouse, but not today.”

He wanted to fuck you badly, make you writhe under him and beg for more. He wanted to be the first one to stretch you out and the first to cum inside your beautiful pussy, but he knew he had to wait.

You were like a delicate, expensive toy. He couldn’t treat you like any other girl. You were pure. Little by little, he wanted to open your eyes and take out the hungry animal in you that would beg for his cock every day. He knew if he was the one to bring you to your amazing climaxes every time, you wouldn’t want anyone else, you’d only crave him. You were his, and he wasn’t going anywhere. He pulled the blanket over your naked body and rubbed your side as you fell asleep. You were tired by the new feelings and his attack on your throat, so you fell asleep quickly. “My little mouse, you’re all mine.” He got up and left the same way he came in. Oddly enough, you never asked him how he got in in the first place. ———— Another two weeks away from Taeyong, you felt a strange urge in your stomach to be with him again, to make him feel good. It’s all you thought about. You saw his perfect face and his smile whenever he called you a good girl. You felt his large hands over your body and imagined them in between your legs. You bit your lips and focused on the drive. Your parents were taking you back to college, the last thing you wanted to do was touch yourself in the backseat while they listened to a gospel album and hummed along. You pouted when you looked at your phone. Taeyong never texted you, maybe because he wanted you to come to him. But part of you was upset. You thought he got what he wanted and ditched you. He didn’t even call the next day to give you tips on how to get rid of the god awful sore throat you had. So you didn’t text him to tell him you were leaving town. Why should you? He wasn’t your boyfriend. —— Three weeks later and Taeyong kept an eye on you all the time. That night he went over to your place he put a tiny tracker in your bag. He always knew where you were and this was how he watched you. So he was shocked to see your strange location on the map when he woke up one morning. You were gone, out of the city and miles away. “Where you going little mouse?” He said to himself with a smirk. He was initially offended by you not notifying him of your leave but then he thought to himself, how wonderful this game of cat and mouse would be.

He could’ve texted you but he didn’t want you to know that he was watching. He wanted to surprise you, but first he needed to know exactly what kinda place you were in.

He went on to your social media and found a pic of you and another girl. The caption was “finally reunited with my fave.” He felt a tinge of jealousy, he thought he was your fave. He then looked at the location and saw the name of the university you were at. It was about 50 miles away so it made sense.

It was time for him to get his fix. He wanted to see you again, to feel your warm body and mouth on his again. He wanted to remind you of who you belonged to because he wouldn’t let you go that easily. He picked up his phone and dialed Johnny. “John..I’m gonna be taking a little vacation..I won’t be back for a few days. Make sure everyone keeps their shit together.” He didn’t wait for Johnny to ask questions, he hung up and gathered his things. ———— “Lets get fucked up!!” Your roommate Jessica yelled out over the music in the club while raising her shot glass. It was your first night together since summer break so you decided to have some fun at the nightclub near campus with a few of your friends. So much for good Christian morals. Everyone was drinking and dancing to the pulsating beats covered by profane language. Some kids were making out and some were talking. You missed Taeyong when you looked at the couples, you wanted to dance with him, to feel his hands all over you. “So my boyfriend and I had sex in the bathroom at Olive Garden over break!” Jessica yelled out over the music. You winced and tried to hide your displeasure at hearing the unnecessary confession. “Oh really? wow.” She had so much more experience than you did, and she knew this. While you had a strict Christian lifestyle back home, Jessica rebelled against it and did everything she wasn’t supposed to do.

She felt good when she talked about her sex life because she knew you couldn’t relate, but she didn’t know about Taeyong. You wanted to tell her how he fucked you with his tongue, but you didn’t, you’d only feel impure if you talked about it.

Luckily, your mutual friend Mark came up and disrupted the conversation before Jessica could go into the details. “Hey!! How are you guys?” Mark called out and hugged you both. You smiled widely and hugged him back, happy to see the cute dork. He pushed up his large round glasses and stuck his hands in his jeans.

Seeing him in a nightclub was strange. He was so innocent and sweet, you always felt a connection as he never had a girlfriend either and focused on church and studying. He was kind and just came back from his missionary trip in a country you forgot the name of. “I’m good! How was your summer overseas?” You asked excitedly. The three of your spoke before dancing together. Mark held your hand and spun you around in the typical flirtatious manner he always had. You two laughed and held each other, a bit tipsy from the alcohol.

You didn’t notice the pair of dark eyes that watched you from the bar. Taeyong drank you in, you wore a black body con dress that hugged your curves and had your hair messy for the first time. Your makeup was also darker than usual. You didn’t look so innocent anymore. He licked his lips and watched as you spoke to the man in front you. He was furious that the nerdy boy had touched you, hugged you. He hated the way he smiled and the way you looked at him like he was your entire world. He wanted to be the only man you looked at like that, so he knew he had to make it stop.

His anger took over, he knew he wouldn’t give a warning. ————— Classes start and it’s been three days since anyone has seen Mark. You were the closest to him so you asked his roommates if they’d seen him but they all shook their heads. You called and texted him but didn’t get a response. That was..until a few hours later. Mark sent a text back and you quickly unlocked your phone to open it. Your mouth dropped when you saw what it was. You quickly walked to the corner of a building on campus and watched the video. It was the same one that Taeyong took, the one of you fucking yourself on the leather seat in the practice room. You close the video and call him repeatedly until he answers, furious at what he had the audacity to send you. Then you heard the ringing sound stop and a breath over the line. “Mark?” You said quietly. There was a moment of silence as you waited for him to answer. “Hello, little mouse.” The voice answers. “..what did you just call me?” Your eyes widen. “Little mouse, you left me all alone..” the deep voice trailed, sending chills up your spine. “T-Taeyong..what did you do? Where’s Mark?” “Your boyfriend’s right here!” You heard Mark’s blood curdling scream and a few loud hits and cracks. Your eyes started to water when you heard the silence. You thought of what Taeyong did to the man at the fair and panicked. “Taeyong..please, don’t do this.” You beg. “How could you cheat on me?” “Cheat? What are you talking about, he’s my friend. And wait, we’re not even dating!” “Oh, sweetheart, you’re mine, I thought I made that very clear.” “Taeyong, you never texted or called me, I’m not yours and I never will be, you’re crazy!” You yelled into the phone, but Taeyong’s haunting chuckle overtook you. “Mmm..little mouse, you’ve gotten brave now, huh? Well..if he’s not your boyfriend and I’m not your boyfriend..I guess I’ll just get rid of him and leave you alone.” “No! Leave him alone!” “Why would I do that?” “Please..Taeyong, dont hurt him, he didn’t do anything wrong..this is my fault, I’m sorry I left you without saying anything.” “And what will you do to make up for it?” Taeyong asked and you paused. You knew what he wanted and you had to give it to him to free Mark. “Fine. I’ll do..whatever you want me to, Taeyong, just leave him alone please.” “I want you to live with me. I can’t breathe without you, little mouse. I need to feel you near me..if you’re too far away, I’m not sure what I’ll do..who I’ll hurt.” He was blackmailing you but what could you do? You had already gone too far. “I-I can’t do that...your life is completely different from my own...and you’re a gang—“ “Then say goodbye to Mark.” “No!” You started but Taeyong already hung up the phone. You hurriedly called the cops and tell them that someone called you from Mark’s phone. You delete the video but showed them the call.

You didn’t tell them who it was you spoke with, you simply said a strange man answered, but you hoped they would be able to track his phone and find Mark. You didn’t want to explicitly say it was Taeyong. But the information you gave them wasn’t enough, so they left and said they’d put out a missing persons report. When you got back to your dorm, you called Taeyong several times, he didn’t answer so you texted Taeyong after he declined them.

Taeyong knew you called the police because he watched the activity on your phone and heard your conversation. Taeyong used your phone number and gave it to his gang’s hacker, Taeil, so he knew who you called and who you texted after Taeil created a duplicate SIM card. He knew you didn’t tell the cops about him and smiled, thinking of how you protected him because you loved him. To Taeyong: please don’t hurt Mark, I take it back, I’ll live with you The guilt was eating away at your heart, you were terrified of what he’d do. Taeyong could’ve just given in and swooped you up that night, but he wanted to make himself clear, he’d hurt anyone that touched you. ———— You didn’t sleep that night.. you got up to go to class but walked by a crowd you saw gathering around the large cross that was seated in the center of campus. Some students turned away and cried, some students put their hands over their mouths. You finally looked up and saw what they did. It was Mark. Bloodied and bruised and tied to the large campus cross to turn it into a crucifix. He was nearly unrecognizable, it was his large round glasses and his favorite watermelon t-shirt that told you it was him. Your eyes started to tear up, your head started to spin, you knew who had done this and you couldn’t breathe. You looked away from Mark’s body as he barely breathed through a swollen lip. Both eyes were black and his hands and feet were swollen from the blood that had collected while he was tied there for what seemed to be hours.

You ran away and cried, unable to breathe. You brushed past campus medical and ran to a corner, where you bent over and screamed. How could he do this to one of your closest friends? Mark didn’t do anything, he was someone that was close to you and now Taeyong had hurt him, who knew what internal damage had been done. Mark only did great things for his community, unlike Taeyong who hurt everyone. And when you finally stopped crying, You were furious. You opened your phone and found Taeyong’s number. You knew you shouldn’t have cursed or wished ill on anyone, it’s not why you were taught, but you were just so mad. To Taeyong: fuck you. You closed the text box and blocked his phone number. You didn’t know that this infuriated and intrigued Taeyong. You weren’t his innocent little girl anymore, and while part of him was a bit hurt, he was more turned on by your sassiness.

He had no regrets for what he did to Mark, he only craved you more when you pushed yourself away from him because he knew that in the end, he’d get you, he’d have you under him, begging for him, loving him and no one else, for forever. Even if that meant hurting or killing everyone close to you. You sat in your room, locked your door and cried. You cursed yourself for not telling the cops about Taeyong. Why were you trying to protect him in the first place? Telling them about him now wouldn’t have made any sense. You had no idea where Taeyong was. They wouldn’t find him, you’d only waste their time again. You couldn’t talk to anyone about Taeyong, they’d say your crazy for letting it get this far. You held your face and thought of what to do, who could keep your information confidential? And then it clicked. You needed to go to the one place that always brought you peace when you had a lot on your mind. ———— Later that day, you went to the campus church, a large and ancient building with incredible high arches and velvet covered benches. You still cried softly as you kneeled in between the benches and prayed for a few minutes. You then went into the confessional box to speak with the priest. You sat on the small bench, resting your back against the walls and exhaling heavily. You couldn’t get the picture of Mark’s messed up face and body out of your mind. “Father..there’s a lot on my mind and my heart.” “Go on, my child.” “I put..my friends safety in great risk.” The tears started to come again as you choked up. “And now, he’s hurt..real bad.. and I know who hurt him..” You paused. “But I don’t know what to do Father..I think I love the man who hurt him, but I don’t know why..and now I can’t even face my friend who is in so much pain because of me.” You sniffled and wiped your eyes. “I’m a coward, father, please forgive me.. I’ve been lustful and ignorant..I’ve put myself before others.” You took in a deep breath and closed your eyes. “Father, I don’t even know if I deserve forgiveness.” “My child..of course you deserve forgiveness. That’s why you are here..you’ve acknowledged your mistakes and now you can learn from them.”

His voice sounded weird, unnatural, but you didn’t question it. “This man..that you love..have you asked for his forgiveness?” Your eyes opened and your brows furrowed. “No, Father, he’s the reason why my friend is hurt, why should I ask for his forgiveness?” “But you’re the one who left him and drove him to violence..it could’ve been prevented if you just did what he asked, if you just went to him and loved him.” You raised your head and your mouth dropped. “I’m-I’m sorry Father, I’m not following.” There was a moment of silence, just the sound of your breathing filled the small booth. “Little mouse, when will you learn?” Taeyong’s voice spoke out from the box, the fake voice you had heard before disappearing. You jumped up and opened the door of the box to run out but Taeyong beat you to it and pushed you back inside. You fell onto the small bench before standing up and trying to push past Taeyong, you opened your mouth to scream but Taeyong quickly put a hand over your mouth while closing the door.

He leaned down and whispered in your ear, keeping anyone else in the church from hearing anything. “Did you really think you could run away and block me?” “Why would you run away from the one that loves you the most?” Taeyong looked somber, genuinely hurt that you stayed away from him. He took his hand from your mouth when your eyes softened.

You breathed heavily. “How could you hurt my friend? I told you I’d do anything you wanted me to?” You cried as you remembered Mark’s bloody face. “I had to let everyone know that you’re mine, sweetheart, don’t you understand?” You shook your head and cried while he head your chin and stepped closer to you. “You’re crazy.” “No, little mouse, this is how people show their love for one another. Sacrifices have to be made for the betterment of the relationship.” You sniffled and you listened to the handsome man above you. “I hurt him..because he touched you, he tainted you that night at the club and I couldn’t stand it because I love you!” Your eyebrows furrowed as you looked at him, unaware that he was at the club that night. “He’s my friend! We were having fun!” Your voice raised. He only smiled and ran his long fingers along the side of your face.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, but please understand me...do you forgive me?” He leaned down and placed soft kisses on your neck.

He held your head, softly tugging your head back so he could kiss your collar bone. “Don’t you remember when I made you feel good?” His low voice spoke against your soft skin.

You whined quietly and leaned into him, you didn’t want him to stop. Your mind told you this was bad, but your body was saying something else.

“Yes.” “I can do that again..but only if you forgive me, do you?” Something about Taeyong was so intoxicating. His hot breath on your lips made you weak, he clouded your mind again and you no longer saw Mark’s bloody face.

You nodded without thinking it through. “Yes.” He pulled back and smiled. Something about his dark eyes in the dimly lit booth made him look dangerously handsome.

“Good..now I have to forgive you for leaving me...how will you gain my forgiveness? What will you do for me, little mouse?” You looked up at him questioningly.

His lips were just centimeters away from yours, you wanted to feel them again.

“I-I’ll do anything.” You let out as you struggled to focus on forming complete sentences. His closeness was driving you crazy in the small booth.

The warmth of his body on yours and his touch made you want more. He gave you a wicked smile. “my sweet girl, there is one thing that has been on my mind.. but only if you’re ready can we do it.” You nodded, already knowing what he was referring to. You wanted it too and his closeness to you only brought out the craving you had weeks ago the last time you were together. “I’m ready.” Taeyong smiled and kissed your neck while he ran a hand up your thigh. He sucked hard to leave a colorful mark on your perfect skin. Your head fell back against the wall behind you and you pushed your body closer to his, feeling his bulge through his jeans. You moaned quietly when he placed his finger tips over your underwear, pushing the outward frills of your plaid skirt up so he could hold your skin. “Taeyong—what if someone walks in?” You breathily let out. He rolled hips into yours with his head still buried in the crook of your neck. “They’ll see how good I make you feel, baby. Now, put your legs around my waist.” Taeyong our two hands in your butt and lifted you up so that your legs wrapped around him. He pinned you to the wall to keep you up. He loved seeing you like this in your plaid skirt, white dress shirt, knee highs and pink bow tie. You’re an innocent girl ready to be fucked in the confessional booth in a church, and that drove him wild. “Unbutton your shirt, sweetheart.” His mouth watered as he pulled away and looked at you. His low eyes watching you breathe heavily. You did as he said while he hurriedly unbuttoned his jeans and pulled his boxers down. His dick sprung up out of the restricted clothing and hit your thigh. He lowered his head back to your boobs and suck the top. “Taeyong—“ You breathily moaned his name as you felt his wet, tongue on your skin and felt his stiff member on your thigh so close to your throbbing entrance. You heard the people in the church move about like they would on any other day. They had no idea that you we’re committing a sin within the walls of the house of God.

It felt wrong, but it felt good. Taeyong pushes your bra down and your boobs spill out to reveal your hard nipples.

He sucks them, licking and pinching them lightly whisk you cry out his name. “Tell me what you want, do you like that?” He let out in a sultry voice, making you whimper and close your eyes. You felt your legs start to waver as your heat grew. “Yes, Taeyong, please.” You begged and ran a hand through his hair. He backs away slightly and holds his cock, he smirks while he watches your low eyes and parted lips. He knew you’d be begging for this and it turned him on even more. He uses his other hand to push your panties aside then rubs his tip on your clit and along your folds. You moan loudly and hold his shoulder, the feeling making you twitch under him. “Tell me how bad you want it.” Taeyong whispered into your ear, still rubbing his length along your wet opening. He takes a nipple into your mouth again. “Please..Taeyong.” You run a hand down his back to pull him closer to you. “Say it, little mouse. What do you want me to do?” He’s pushing you to the point of begging and you didn’t care. “Please, Taeyong, please fuck me.” That’s all he needed to hear. He pushed into you slowly. He knows it’s your first time so you’re tight. He watches you and waits for you to get used to the new feeling. You cry out at the pain and close your eyes. When you feel like you’ve finally adjusted you nod, and he pushes into you again, this time he rubs your clit. “Relax, sweetheart, you’re doing so well.” “Oh.my God.” You feel tears run down your cheek as he stretches you out and pushes even further into your body, driving you up the wall. He holds your waist to keep your firm against him. He groans and looks down at your small pussy stretching around him.

“Fuck, so tight, baby.” He lets out then watches as he pulls out, his thumb still rubbing circles. You wince as he pushes back in and breathe heavily. “Good girl.” He kisses your lips as he starts to move in and out of you slowly. He pushed into you deep every time and almost pulls out completely. Your dig into his back through his thin t shirt with your nails as he drives your body up the wall of the confessional. Something about the fact that you, the daughter of a pastor, was being fucked in a church by the man they called the grim reaper pushed you further to your climax. It was all so hot. He moves faster as you get even more wet, allowing him to slip in and out easily. Your head falls back and your mouth opens as your moans get louder.You ran your hands along his toned arms as he kisses your neck sloppily. “Taeyong!” You call out his name as the lewd sounds of him pounding into your wet entrance grows and your hand moves faster. You close your legs tightly around his waist. He puts a hand over your mouth to stop your moans as he hits your g spot repeatedly. He nearly goes crazy himself with the feeling of your tight, velvety walls clenching around him. You felt so good around him, it was even better than he had dreamed of. And now hearing your high pitched moans as you sinned for him, drove him to the edge. He kissed your neck and pushed into you hard while still covering your wet mouth with his hand.

Your boobs jumped up and down as he fucked you against the wall. His back was covered in scratch marks as you finally released onto him.

Your body shook while he still pushed into you hard. Your muffled cries quieted down and he kept moving but he let go of your mouth and watched it fall open. The sight of your drooling for him and making quiet, mousy sounds as he fucked you silly, made him realize he was about to cum. He pulled out of quickly and you slid down the wall and onto the small bench. You looked up at him through wet eyes while he pumped his cum out of his long dick. “Open wide.” You opened your mouth and watched as the long strings of cum left his dick and entered your mouth. He moved his hand all over it and made sure that your mouth was covered in his essence. He grunted as some leaked out and coated your chin. He tapped his tip on your tongue while getting out the last amount. You licked it before he pulled away. “Swallow.” You swallowed and closed your eyes, still focused on the feeling of losing your virginity. Taeyong held your hand after zipping his jeans up and cleaning your chin with his thumb. “I love you..don’t ever leave me again.” He held your head in his hand and pulled you in for a kiss. You kissed him back, feeling your sensitive body tremble while he touched you softly. You felt good, so good as the post-sex buzz roared through your body. You wanted to be with him forever and to feel him again and again. But why did you feel like something bad was bound to happen?

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medeafive · 3 years

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buckynat prompt: Buky joins the Avengers and Nat as his mentor (sort of like Coulson was to her and Clint), who explains/helps him to integrate better into the team. :) if you feel inspired.

I came across this years-old ask (sorry) and inspiration struck so here you go: good old retro tower fic with movie nights, Thor making pop tarts, Clint playing Angry Birds and all that.

(To the anon who sent a prompt more recently, I got it and I’ll get to it! Just don’t expect me to be quick lol)

Bucky’s not comfortable with this team thing. They all already know each other, have their established dynamics, all easy-going and sassy, and now he’s right in the middle and- it’s awkward. He’s not good at human-ing yet. Natasha and Steve both say it’ll come back, and that they all know their share of awkwardness, but he’s not so sure about that. His case is different. Just because he pulled it together enough to let himself be found by Steve, to come back with him-

He’s still not cleared for active duty, which he actually doesn’t mind that much. Hanging out in the tower is fine, he can handle most of them individually, even in small groups, but the real horror for him is movie night. All of them at once, one louder than the other, alcohol, some fast-paced movie he can barely focus on, and it’s all so crowded, too. Of course, the worst one was when Stark somehow made them all watch The Manchurian Candidate. But every time Bucky tries to suggest he’ll skip movie night, Steve gives him the worst puppy eyes he’s ever seen and he says yes to everything again. He really doesn’t want to disappoint Steve. And it’s not like he has any good excuses for not going, he doesn’t have missions like the rest of them.

They’re squabbling about the movie choice again, as they always do, and Bucky’s just sitting there quietly with the popcorn Thor distributed cheerfully to everyone. Barton wants to watch something funny, Stark wants to watch a horror movie because apparently Halloween is a whole season for him, Steve is trying to interest them in movies from back in the day without any success while Banner keeps suggesting films that don’t even have English titles and Thor is reacting to everything he’s heard of before, though he seems to mix most of it up. Bucky doesn’t really care what they’re watching as long as he doesn’t have to sit in the middle. Having people on both sides feels way too crowded. There’s no clear majority until Thor discovers there’s a movie called Paddington about a bear in a hat, and then everyone falls in line with that, though Stark only does so begrudgingly.

Bucky sits on the right side so it’s all good, and he pays some attention while also nibbling absent-mindedly on the popcorn. Natasha slips in about halfway through the movie, wet hair, rosy skin, and he remembers she had a mission, though he can’t remember what. Or maybe she didn’t tell him. She took it on herself to be something like a mentor to him, someone who understands what he’s going through, who doesn’t have as many expectations for him as Steve, who’ll help him settle in. She’s good at it, too, but she’s good at everything so that’s not surprising. He really really likes Natasha, more than he cares to admit, and he relaxes somewhat when she drops onto the couch next to him. “Hey.”

“Hey,” she whispers back. “Mind if I sit here?”

He finds he doesn’t. She smells of citrus fruit, probably the shampoo. “Sure. Mission went well?”

“Well enough,” she replies, extending her legs and making herself comfortable like a big lazy cat. “Mhm. Was that Clint’s idea?”

“Thor really latched onto it,” he replies. “Apparently, two is a majority here.”

She chuckles, shifting again until her shoulder rubs against his, and he really only stops breathing for one second, at most.

He doesn’t pay any attention to the movie after that and it just flies by, time best measured by how often Natasha has reached over into his popcorn bowl. She chews very quietly. Or maybe the movie is just too loud to hear. Anyway, it’s over way too soon, credits rolling, and Natasha reaches into the popcorn bowl a final time before scooting a little away from him. Thor has thoughts about the movie, loudly proclaimed thoughts, and it goes back and forth for a while without Bucky really listening. He notices Banner quietly folding up what looks like some scientific journal on the other end of the couch. Steve turns to ask Bucky about the movie when he notices Natasha. “Oh hey. Nat. Didn’t see you there.”

Natasha reaches into the popcorn bowl again. “Yeah, didn’t want to disturb.”

“Glad you could make it,” Steve replies. “Did you get that business in Laos under control?”

He doesn’t remember that, so she probably really didn’t tell him. “Pretty much,” she replies, munching unabashedly. “I’ll debrief you all tomorrow. It’s not urgent.”

Steve yawns. “Tomorrow sounds good. It’s already late.”

“Oh come on, you old man,” Stark complains. “Really? Oh, hey, Romanoff.”

“Yeah, yeah, you night owl,” Steve returns, getting up. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning in the gym. Good night, Buck.”

“It’s not even 10,” Stark states. “We could easily watch another movie.”

“I’m out as well,” Banner says quietly. “One movie is really enough.”

Stark groans. “The god of movie night? Please?”

“Sorry, my friend,” Thor replies. “I promised Jane I would call her.”

“I’m game,” Barton interjects. “I mean, we can just watch without them. Tasha?”

Natasha shrugs. “I’m jet lagged, I won’t sleep anyway.”

“Well, then good night, boring friends,” Stark decides. “What do you want to watch?”

Barton shrugs. “Whatever. Hey, Thor, are you still making the cake pops tomorrow?”

Thor looks back. “Of course! Thanks for reminding me. I shall make them tomorrow.”

“Well, that’s one reason to get out of bed,” Barton remarks, turning back. “Any ideas on the movie?”

“How about Pretty Woman,” Stark teases. “I hear someone likes redheads.”

He blushes though he doesn’t mean to. Stark makes references like that all the time and Bucky still can’t handle it. Yes, fine, they spar together, and if she occasionally ends up having her legs around his neck, that’s a choking move and that’s why he gets red-faced and not at all anything else, no reason to be weird about it and say stuff like between her thighs- “Yeah, you,” Natasha throws back. “I noticed. I don’t really care but not Pretty Woman.”

“It’s weird that you’re over there,” Barton remarks with amusement. “I assume you don’t have suggestions, buddy?”

He shakes his head. Most of the movies he remembers are silent and Hydra didn’t care to keep him up on anything that didn’t involve killing people. Natasha climbs over him, accidentally kicking Barton’s arm. “Yeah, I’ll just come over. Whoops.”

“Oh, you like horror movies, don’t you?” Stark asks. “I bet you haven’t seen The Conjuring yet.”

“I haven’t,” Natasha confirms, settling in on Bucky’s left side. “I mean, if you want, sure.”

“JARVIS, you heard her,” Stark says. “Unless Birdbrain objects.”

Barton shrugs, pulling his feet in. “You know I don’t have taste.”

“Mind if I take that?” Natasha asks, pulling the popcorn bowl from Bucky’s lap to hers. “Then we can share. Clint, you know popcorn’s not real food.”

“You’re one to talk,” Barton shoots back, and then the film already starts rolling.

It turns out horror is bad. He actually thought he liked it, vague memories about taking girls to the theater and them squealing and grabbing his hand tightly, but the moment the creepy music starts, the hair on the back of his neck stands. He tries not to look too much, focuses on picking unpopped popcorn from the bottom of the bowl, his heart is racing unnecessarily, it’s just a movie, he has seen real horrors, this is just some invented bullshit- The next jumpscare hits him hard and his knee hits Natasha’s, rattling the popcorn bowl, and he could curse himself for making so much noise, drawing so much attention-

“Hey, JARVIS, pause,” Natasha orders, putting the bowl in Barton’s lap and climbing over the back of the couch. “You know what, I need a drink.”

Stark snorts. “You know what, make that two.”

Bucky’s heartbeat calms down a little. Okay. He can do this. It’s just a movie. He can’t admit he got scared because of a movie. He has a reputation, goddamnit. Barton gives him an unreadable look. Natasha climbs back over with two glasses, somehow not spilling anything. “There. Cheers.”

“Cheers,” Stark returns, knocking his glass against hers and then starting to sip.

The awful movie continues playing and Bucky’s a little short of distractions to focus on, given that Barton is still holding the popcorn bowl. He doesn’t even have anything to drink but getting up now would seem suspicious. Just sit through it. How long can this damned movie be? He’s been through worse. He can do this.

His heart rate doesn’t really go down, though, sweaty right palm, the old fight or flight but definitely don’t just sit there, which is unfortunately exactly what he has to do. He tries to focus on Natasha’s comforting smell, he thinks it’s orange, he often tells her about his nightmares and that makes it a little better, he’s here on the couch and the movie is just a movie after all-

He wasn’t paying attention so the jumpscare startles him badly, elbows jolting in, hands fisting- something grabs his metal hand and he relaxes slightly, Natasha’s thumb sliding into his palm- but then he realizes Natasha is holding his left hand, holding it tightly, thumb rubbing his metal palm, and his heart rate jumps up a notch. He feels everything in the metal arm, despite what he tells Steve when it’s malfunctioning, so he really feels Natasha’s small hand wrapped around his, squeezing his, and he actually doesn’t hear the movie anymore over the blood rushing through his ears.

He’s certainly not going to let go and she doesn’t either. He chances a look but she’s just staring ahead, gripping his metal hand. Fine by him. There’s more scary shit happening on screen but it doesn’t quite register. Barton starts arguing about something and Stark argues back but it’s all just a hum, Natasha flips her hand and presses all four fingers into his metal palm, thumb sliding over the back of his hand soothingly. Well. If there’s ever been a distraction, that was it.

He still startles, though, and Natasha squeezes his hand so hard he’d never dare do it to her, for fear of breaking her hand, and then there’s a particularly bad bit that makes him tense in the shoulders and she leans over slightly and whispers “it’s over soon” in his ear. That makes it a little better. Most of all, it makes it very hard to focus on the movie.

The bad bit is long, feels long, but then the rest flies by almost regrettably fast and before he knows it, Natasha has pulled her hand back and the lights are turning on again. He blinks slowly, awakening from a dream-like state. “I don’t know,” Barton remarks. “Witches, really?”

“We fight with gods and aliens and you want to object to witches?” Stark complains.

“Not witches generally,” Barton retreats. “But weren’t they saying that the woman burned during the whatever century witch hunt was actually a witch? Wasn’t that the whole point?”

“I mean, it’s a horror movie,” Stark replies. “Does it really have to make sense?”

“I thought it was great,” Natasha says. “Not necessarily anything new or creative but solid horror stuff.”

He’s still shaken, though he can’t tell whether that’s from the movie or from Natasha’s tiny hand squeezing his. “Yeah, they’re going to make like 5000 sequels and spin-offs,” Stark remarks. “Hey, popsicle, you don’t look too happy about it.”

“I don’t know,” Bucky replies, carefully restrained. “I kinda zoned out, wasn’t really paying attention.”

That’s kinda true, actually, he couldn’t retell the story though the creepy music and the shock effects are very fresh in his mind. Natasha casually pats his thigh. “I’m hungry. Any food in the house that isn’t popcorn?”

“Fridge is fully stocked,” Stark reports, pulling out one of his fancy phones. “Yeah, I’m out though. Pep scheduled me a 9am tomorrow.”

“The horror,” Barton remarks sarcastically. “Nah, I’ll think I’ll go to bed. Or, you know, play Angry Birds.”

“You know that’s not the same thing as sleeping,” Natasha accuses, climbing over the back of the sofa. “Okay, good night, losers, I’m making myself a sandwich.”

She disappears into the kitchen and Bucky realizes he stared after her again. Stark snorts, swiping over his magic phone. “Hill says there’s something in Brazil we should take a look at. Yeah, tomorrow.”

“Again?” Barton questions. “Weren’t we there only a few weeks ago?”

“Yeah, turns out us being there didn’t magically fix everything,” Stark replies. “Surprisingly.”

Barton rolls his eyes, getting up with a groan. “Yeah, that sounds like a problem for tomorrow me. Great guy, he can do anything. You’ll meet him tomorrow.”

“You keep telling me about that guy and he never shows up,” Stark returns, typing something. “Okay. See you tomorrow then, there’ll be a meeting and all.”

Bucky has never been to one but they all seem to hate it. Barton flips the bird and slumps over to the elevator. Stark is still typing, frowning. “Mhm. Any plans, robobrain?”

“No,” Bucky replies carefully. “Not really.”

Stark huffs with amusement, stuffing the phone away and grinning. “I see. Have fun zoning out then. Staring blankly into the dark or whatever it is that you do.”

He feels like if Stark made an inappropriate comment now, he’d snap, but somehow the guy just grabs his not yet empty drink and saunters off down the stairs to the other elevator. This building is complicated. He waits until the elevator doors open and then close again, taking Stark’s humming up with them. Then he sighs, pushing up, and walks slowly over into the kitchen.

Natasha is indeed making a sandwich, washing lettuce like it’s just what she does, not like she’s 130 pounds of could kill you. Well, he doesn’t know her weight. She looks up when he leans in the doorway. “Don’t wanna go to bed yet?”

“No.” He bites his lip. He’s not really hungry, too jumpy and unsettled.

She makes a sympathetic noise. “The movie didn’t sit well with you, huh?”

Not at all. “Especially the bit about demonic possession,” he admits. “Thanks, though, I didn’t want to- didn’t want to tell them.”

“It’s totally okay if you can’t handle horror movies,” Natasha replies, placing the lettuce in her sandwich. “I mean, they’re designed to stress you out. But I get that that’s hard to admit.”

He breathes out. She has this way of making you comfortable with her, open up to her, and somehow it doesn’t feel sinister or manipulative but good. Like she understands. He still feels her tiny hand against his. “It’s just- one stressful thing stacked on top of another on top of another.”

“Yeah, I know,” she agrees, squirting some sauce into the sandwich. “That’s just what life is.”

He grabs one of the bar stools and sits down. “What about you? You were gone for a while.”

She shoots him a grin, capping the sandwich off. “Ah, you know how it is. Nice beach holiday.”

He snorts. “Isn’t Laos the one state in Southeast Asia that doesn’t have a coast?”

“Good catch,” she remarks, biting off the sandwich. “Have you been studying geography?”

“Reading up on Vietnam, mostly,” he replies. “I’m pretty certain I was there at some point but I didn’t really understand what was going on at the time. I mean, I still don’t understand it.”

She chuckles. “Yeah, that’s not on you. No, the mission was fine. Didn’t get too messy.”

She’s often secretive about missions, probably a habit from her SHIELD days. He’s learned to avoid it. “Good weather at least?”

She smirks, taking another bite of her sandwich. “Ha. Summer monsune. It was super humid. Hot, too.”

That does sound familiar. Yeah, he shouldn’t kid himself, he probably did some really bad stuff in Vietnam, even if he doesn’t remember right now. Another minefield. He sighs, straightening. Tomorrow. "I think I’ll go to bed. Might join Steve in the gym tomorrow morning.”

“Could you-” she cuts in, wiping the pink-ish sauce out of the corner of her mouth. “Wanna stay just a minute? I’ll be done soon.”

He frowns, sinking back into the chair. “No hurry. Why?”

“Nothing,” she replies, chewing. “Nothing. Sure you don’t want anything to eat?”

His stomach still feels too fluttery for that. “No, I’m good. Are you okay?”

“All good,” she reassures him. “Just give me a minute, then we can go upstairs together.”

Wait, that’s weird. And not in the blushing way. “Seriously, what’s going on?”

She chuckles suddenly. “Okay, okay, I’ll tell you. Promise not to laugh.”

“Okay.”

She wipes another bead of sauce off her lip. Yeah, that was too much. “Okay. Don’t laugh. I get really scared during horror movies.”

He almost laughs. “Come on, you weren’t.”

“I hide it well,” she replies. “And I’ll forget it the next day but right now, I wouldn’t go into the dark and I’m watching that corner really hard.”

Oh, she’s serious. “So why did you watch it?”

“Please.” She snorts, picking up some lost lettuce. “I have a reputation. I can’t admit I’m scared because of a stupid movie.”

Well, he wouldn’t have believed her. “So when you grabbed my hand-”

“That wasn’t just for you,” she finishes. “Now, if you tell anyone, I will murder you.”

Of course. “Don’t worry, no one would believe me anyway.”

“True,” she admits, taking another bite. “So, now you know. I still think it’s fun, though.”

He can’t agree with that right now but maybe he can in the future. “Okay, I’ll just stay until you finish. And I’ll gladly walk you back to your room.”

She snorts. “Don’t get all gentlemanly on me. Thanks, though.”

He’d actually like to thank her but he’s already been cheesy enough. “No problem. But don’t you dare tell Stark.”

She grins mischievously. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

#buckynat #bucky barnes #winter soldier #natasha romanoff #black widow #avengers tower #my writing #fanfic

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