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randomquietkid · 2 years

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"Surfboards and Sketchbooks" pt2

(If you haven't read part one of surfboards and sketchbooks please read it before you can find it on my page. Sorry I don't have a masterlist with all my fics yet, I can't figure out how to change the name on the links and I don't have that many posted. This part accidentally kinda turned into an all about me so you get to learn a little about me. If you want me to change some of the things because it is too personal and isn't varied enough I can totally do that. I'm pretty sure I'll be doing another part and I know what it will basically be talking about but I don't know what will happen so who knows I might have a fourth part too. I do think this part was a little all over the place and I don't like it as much as the first part so sorry If it disappointed some of y'all cause I think I could have done better.If you enjoy don't be afraid to send in requests there is a pinned post on my page of all the characters I would write about)

Trigger warnings: none. Probably cursing

Enjoy <3

Y/n POV:

I walked into school with my music blasting in my ears. I was listening to Alec Benjamin. As I looked around I saw that pretty much everyone looked the same. Tan, blond or brown haired, and a Summer wardrobe. Me on the other hand pale, brown hair and graphic tees, flannel and ripped jeans (I put what I would wear just because it was easier to write but I will change it if any of you would like. Kinda like a description of what I look like though ;) stood out from the crowd. My phone was laying on top of my sketchbook and book (right now I'm reading the Good Girl Complex but you can choose whatever you want) with my wire earbuds out the charger plug. I walked into the office to get my schedule from the front desk lady and saw the guy that I drew at the beach walk out. "JJ not even into first period and your already here" the Lady at the front desk said as she walked back from the printer with my schedule. "Yep. Sorry Mrs. B" he said "Y/n Y/l/n,here's your schedule dear. Have a great first day" she said as she handed me my schedule "thank you" I replied and walked out the office. 𝘑𝘑 was his name. As I made my way to first period from the office I saw JJ look at me walking away. Did he recognize me too, I really hope not.

First period was Social Study's. It was boring. I get the whole "don't want to repeat history" thing but if this generation did anything for history it would be either burn the world down or get so bad that people leave it, probably both. As I drowned out the teacher and started drawing in my sketchbook I heard shuffling next to me and saw 𝗝𝗝 sit in the desk next to me. Fuck. "Well I didn't want to jump right into work so I want everyone to fill out this get to know me worksheet" the teacher explained and many annoyed groans and complaints were verbalized but I just rolled my eyes. What are we 10, my teachers have been giving us that same worksheet since 1st grade. JJ passed me the sheet with a smile and leaned over to whisper " Have you also been doing this sheet on the first day of school for forever" he questioned with a small laugh "yep. Pretty sure they don't even read them just throw them away, basically gives them a free day" I said telling him my theory. He laughed "makes sense. I would" I nodded in agreement. " this may seem weird but, were you the one to sketch me at the beach two weeks ago" JJ asked. Shit he knows. " umm yeah. I'm sorry about my friends" I said apologizing for whatever they did. " don't worry about it, you have real talent. It was amazing"." why thank you" I smiled back at him as I felt my face heat up. Our conversation ended with both of us smiling as I looked at the sheet and saw the same questions as last year. 'What is your favorite food' *favorite food* 'what is your favorite music to listen to' *favorite music* (character playlists. Very hard to choose. Theres sooo many good artists) 'what do you like to do in your free time' *what you like to do* (for character purpose y/n will like drawing/painting and reading) 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑟 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑑𝑟𝑎𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑔. 'Your favorite show' *your favorite show* 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑚𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑜𝑟 𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑤𝑜𝑙𝑓, 𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑙𝑦 𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑠𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑘 𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙 ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑒/ 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙𝑒𝑟 ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑒, 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑔 𝑠ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑑𝑜𝑛 (I have an unhealthy obsession with sharks thanks to my sister making me watch jaws at the age of six and then i had a really weird dream that got over my fear of sharks) 'favorite movie' 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑣𝑒𝑙 𝑚𝑐𝑢 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑖𝑒, 𝑗𝑎𝑤𝑠, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑒𝑔, 𝑢𝑛𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑒𝑑, 𝑎𝑙𝑙 ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑟𝑦 𝑝𝑜𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑓𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑐 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑠, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑧𝑒 𝑟𝑢𝑛𝑛𝑒𝑟 'favorite summer memory' 𝑤𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑎 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑟𝑡 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑚𝑦 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑏𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑠 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑚𝑜𝑠𝑡𝑙𝑦 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑎𝑐𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑜𝑥𝑒𝑠 *what you did* (I did go to a concert and a lot of book stores but summer isn't over yet where I'm from) 'favorite color' 𝑏𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑑𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 * your favorite color* (black or greens) 'do you have any pets' 𝑛𝑜 *your pets if you have any* (I kinda forgot what else were on those sheets so that's all and I have two dogs) 'dinggggg' finally class was over. "As you get ready to leave put your papers on my dest, I can't wait to read them" our teacher said. Me and JJ gave each other a look and both laughed a little as I bet he thought about what I said earlier. I got up and put the paper on the teachers desk and left the classroom. As I put my earbuds back in and pulled out my schedule to see where I was supposed to be next I felt a someone tap my shoulder. I turned around and saw JJ behind me playing with his rings and his friends by the staircase doing a horrible job at trying not to watch whatever was about to happen. "Hi" "hi" "umm so I was wondering if you want to sit with me and my friends at lunch" he asked "yeah I would love to" "awesome" I laughed a little and he smiled "what's your next class so I know where to pick you up from" he asked "wow such a gentleman, umm I have *blah blah blah*" he smiled and said "really, me too. Well actually all of my friends and me do" "that's great. Do you mind walking me I have no idea where I'm going" I asked as I put

My schedule in my back pocket. "Yep no problem" he said leading me to his friends. "Y/n this is John B, Pope and Kiara" JJ said as he introduced his friends "hi" I said and they all waved. "Y/n has the same class as us next and she doesn't know where to go so she's walking with us" he explained to his friends and the nodded and started leading the way. I got a little distracted when my earbuds got tangled in the swirl of my sketchbook as I tried to untangle them I heard John B ask JJ "sooo definitely don't have a crush on her" not convinced. I heard him wince because JJ elbowed him in the ribs "shup up. And I don't know but shut the fuck up I don't want her to hear you" JJ said. I laughed a little at his antics. When we got into *blah blah blah* classroom JJ and his friends sat towards the back, as the sat down I almost sat in a seat towards the side of the classroom with the door but JJ patted the seat next to me implying me to sit there. I gave him a 'are you sure' look and he nodded. "You sure" I asked again once I sat down. "Positive" he replied smiling.

As the teacher went on about some of the class rules and units and shit I started drawing a little alien dude in the corner of my sketchbook as I felt a piece of paper hit my hand. I looked over and saw a crumbled up piece of paper on my desk and I saw a smirking JJ next to me. I opened it to read it and it said "go on a date with me Saturday" with two boxes below one with yes one with no. I could feel my cheeks heat up as I read that. I checked the yes box and gave it back to JJ. I looked over at him to see his reaction, he had smiled really big. That made me smile. So we were just some idiots smiling in the back of the classroom as the teacher explained rules. But I didn't care, even though i don't know the kid I'm freaking out about our 𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲 Saturday.

#jj x reader #JJ #obx jj x reader #obx netflix #obx fic #maybank #jj fluff #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank #made by myself #part 2 #Surfboards and sketchbooks #Surfboards and sketchbooks pt2

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bitchesofostwick · 5 years

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2018 writer review

i was tagged by my dear friend @veridium-bye (thank you love!). i really didn’t start writing fic again until about october, so this is really a review of three months out of this year, but i’m still really proud of what i’ve done!

words written in 2018: 73,770

number of short fics/drabbles written in 2018: 39 (thirty-one of these were OC-tober ficlets, four were art trade/gift fics, and the remaining four were miscellaneous stories for my OCs)

number of fic chapters written in 2018: 11 (three for All of My Walls and eight for A World Alone)

number of chaptered fics completed in 2018: just one! All of My Walls, a three-chapter fic of aurelia hawke and fenris spanning the time between the “a bitter pill” quest through the end of the in-game DA2 events. it was really important to me for two reasons: one, aurelia and fenris are a rivalmance pair, but a lot of rivalmance fics i see are basically...just hate sex? and for fenris, and for aurelia, there are so many more layers and personal history that lends itself to their romance and creates these waves of tension and sadness and anger and heartbreak, but never hatred. i tackle the rivalmance in a bit of an easier (and generally humorous) light in their shorter fics, but All of My Walls is much more serious and i’m so proud of both of them for growing into themselves and each other and slowly allowing themselves love and be loved over the course of that fic. the OTHER reason that fic was so important to be is that it’s the first long(er) fic i wrote in a long, long time, and i consider it my way back into writing. i don’t think it reads as seamlessly as fics i’ve written since then do, but i’m still proud of myself for creating it, and i’m thankfully that it brought me back into the writing world.

fandoms: only dragon age this year! i haven’t touched my skyrim fic since 2017, and i toyed around with the idea of a kotor fic in the spring, but it never amounted to anything.

pairings: mainly ellinor trevelyan x cullen, emilia cousland x alistair, and aurelia hawke x fenris; HOWEVER, i’m eternally grateful to @fourletterepithet (velthei lavellan x cullen), @haloneshiral (letheia lavellan x cullen), @frecklef0x (anon trevelyan x dorian), and @gingerbreton (ysabelle dryden x alistair) for granting me the honor of writing about their OCs and letting me explore the dynamics of other pairings/relationships! writing for others is a really great experience to grow and strengthen your own writing, so i’m really glad i got to do those stories.

proudest achievements: i’m honestly just...proud i wrote anything at all? it’s so intimidating to come into a fandom that’s years and years old and put your content out there for people to see, especially when you haven’t written leisurely in a couple years and you’re really self-conscious of your work, like i am. but i took the leap, and people have been so responsive and supportive, and i’m eternally grateful for the very kind mutuals/readers i have that continue to inspire me to keep going and creating. some more minor achievements include

starting art trades. before doing this, i truly, genuinely did not believe that the brilliantly talented artists i see on tumblr every day would ever value their incredible work as equal to a short fic written by me. to me, it seemed like trading down. it turns out, i was wrong, and i’ve so far traded three one shots for three beautiful pieces of artwork, and as i mentioned earlier, it’s so refreshing and also so beneficial (in terms of writing skill and practice) to write for OCs that are not my own, so i’m so glad to have done these!

forcing myself to write action scenes. if you’ve been following me for a while, you’ve probably seen me complain multiple times about how much i hate writing action (i even made a meme about it that somehow went viral within the writeblr community lol joke’s on them it was made as a result of me rage quitting a dragon battle scene). the only thing i hate more than writing action is writing mage action, because none of my OCs are mages and all of my friends’ OCs are mages and i cannot understand the dynamics of mage combat no matter how hard i try. but, you can’t get better at something unless you practice it, so i wrote plenty of action in an attempt to get better. and i think (hope?) i did.

starting A World Alone!! my pride and joy!! my first longfic!! my favorite OC!! it’s a slow burn it’s an enemies-to-friends-to-lovers there’s tension there’s sadness there’s powerful female friendships there will be love eventually and i could go on about it for forever but instead i’ll just shamelessly plug it here because i love it so much and it makes me so happy.

writing goals for 2019

i would really love to join DWC but so far it looks intimidating to me because i’m worried i won’t be able to sit down for a night and keep up. but i’ll probably do it. i have so many good prompt posts saved in my drafts that i want to do.

more art trades! i have three already planned for the new year, and i’m very excited about them!

maybe finish A World Alone? i’m writing it at a good pace so far, so it’s a realistic goal.

more one shots. i love my longfic (obviously, as i blabbed about it relentlessly above), but i think shorter fics are such great opportunities to really focus in on a singular emotion and delve deep into little moments that are so brief in terms of plot but so big in terms of characterization. there are a few in particular i’m really proud of from this year (x, x, x, x, x, x), but i’m looking forward to more.

tagging friends (keeping it to friends who write, even a little!! any amount of writing is good writing!) @inquisitorsmabari @fourletterepithet @dickeybbqpit @trvelyans @a-shakespearean-in-paris @star--nymph @cullenvhenan @daydreamingdragonage @gingerbreton

#tag game #my writing #sorry that i basically used this post to link and plug all my fics #but i'm proud of them ok

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qianinterprises · 3 years

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Summer '78

Pairing | bully!Jeno x chubby!Reader

Warning(s) | bullying, harsh words, cussing, sexual assault, name calling, fat shaming, poor shaming, face slapping, angst, hurtful comments, yelling, the Dreamies are not nice people (I know I did Jaemin wrong, I'm sorry)

Synopsis | Jeno was a bully, and you were his primary victim. Nothing should have changed, but Jeno began getting tired of bullying the girl he was in love with simply because she didn't conform to societies beauty standards. So she was chubby? So what?! His friends didn't see it that was.

Genre | ANGST, retro-flashback

Author’s Notes | So I wrote this a while back for an event of NCTA, which was basically writing a retro fic. This fic is very different than the fics I usually write. For one, it is told in Jeno's perspective rather than the readers. For two, this is a "chubby fic." Meaning the reader is seen in the fic as having a larger body weight, which, may I add here, is not a problem, nor should it ever be. If you are being bullied for anything, please don't let it go unreported. Report it as many times as you have to because bullying is not ok, whether it's done at school, at home, or anywhere else. Also, there is a possibility that there will be a part two, I have had some people (before posting it here) request a part two but I'm on the fence about that, but perhaps a part two will show some change and growth on Jeno's part. So we'll see. Tell me your opinions though! I hope you enjoy~

Word Count | 3.5k

Taglist | @treasuretaeil @hachanbaecon @nschitty

A group of six boys sat around a table talking and laughing until a loud crash resounded through the snack shack that brought their attention to a waitress on the floor, yellow heels scattered behind her, empty tray in her hands and spilled drinks everywhere as well as on a girl by the table the waitress had fallen at.

“Clutz,” one of the boys, Jeno, mumbled, shaking his head.

“Fatass,” Jeno’s best friend, Jaemin responded.

The other four muttered something along the lines of agreement as they watched the waitress cowering on the floor with a bright red face as the girl now covered in cola shrieked about her ruined clothing and hair.

Jaemin got up from his seat angrily.

“What the hell are you doing to my girlfriend!” he yelled, approaching the pair.

“Jaeminnie! She poured soda all over me!” the girl pouted, running into Jaemins arms.

Jeno rolled his eyes.

Jeno shook his head. Out of all of the boys in their biker gang, Jaemin just had to be the most gullible, falling for the Queen Bee of the high school who used him for nothing more than his money and face.

“She ruined my shirt,” Jeno heard the girl whine.

Jaemin embraced her tighter.

“You’ll have to pay for her clothing, fatty!” Jaemin demanded.

The waitress was someone Jeno recognized. (Y/F/N) (Y/L/N). She had been one of his best friends when he was a shy ten year old trying to fit in. They both befriended Jaemin and the rest of their group and somewhere along the way, he’d gotten muscular and tall while she’d gotten chubby. With Jeno’s looks, he’d always been popular with girls, but when he became interested in them as more than friends, he’d dumped the girl in favor of girlfriends.

She was a bullied girl wearing outdated clothing that made adequate grades. A nobody. She didn’t fit into any groups. She drifted through high school being shoved against lockers while her books were thrown across the hallway and what little lunch money she had was stolen. More often than not, Jeno or one of the other guys was the perpetrator.

“I can’t…” (y/n) muttered, looking down at the floor.

Jaemin kicked the carrying tray away from her, making the girl flinch.

Something in Jeno’s heart snapped against his chest, but he’d never allow it to escape. He watched tears gather in the corner of the girl's eyes and Jeno fought the urge to pull her to his chest.

Feelings began to stir their first year in high school when he and (y/n) had been seated side-by-side in homeroom and he’d leaned over to tease her about her recent, awkwardly styled hair when he’d met the most beautiful eyes he’d ever seen.

The feelings made his stomach twist in knots and his body tingled. Feelings and sensations that only grew stronger when their skin brushed or when her angelic voice met his ears.

The feelings were what drove him to brash treatment. His hands shoving her shoulders against the lockers as he demanded for her money. Fingers harshly tugging at the ends of her hair. His voice yelling horrible things at her just to hear her speak back.

He couldn’t tell anyone how he was feeling either. Dating the chubby girl would cause him to lose whatever popularity he had obtained along with his pride and his gang. Their leader couldn’t be seen as the weak punk who decided to date the chubby girl from a poor family.

Jaemin sneered down at the blushing girl, taunting her loudly and Jeno watched her feeble attempt at hiding her face.

“Jaemin! Let’s go. Chubby over here isn’t worth our time,” Jeno called loudly, voice filled with authority that had Jaemin immediately moving away from the girl.

“Fine. But she owes us free meals for a week! Those clothes were expensive!” Jaemin whined.

He kissed his girlfriend's cheek and walked to the door to wait on the rest of the gang who were stuffing their last few fries in their mouths or finishing off their milkshakes.

“Let’s roll,” Jaemin called, a grin on his face.

Jeno shook his head at how fast the male changed perspectives. He grabbed his leather jacket off the back of his chair, sliding his arms into it and let it snap against his back.

The last few members finished their plates, leaving them on the table before grabbing their own jackets and following Jaemin out the door. Jeno took the end, stopping by the waitress on the floor.

“Maybe get some heels your fat feet can walk in, huh Dollface?” he sneered.

Her face flew red again and he rolled his eyes.

“And you should stop blushing. You look like a tomato. Vegetables aren’t attractive. Although it’s fitting. Tomatoes are plump.”

He walked out the door without another word, heart hammering painfully in his ears. He wanted to tell her how beautiful she was, but that was a problem. He couldn’t think chubby girls were beautiful. What would his friends think?

The loud purr of an engine met his ears and he sighed happily, most of his regret getting washed away, uprooted by the smell of motor oil and tires.

Jeno’s ride was a cherry red 1960 Harley-Davidson motorcycle with shiny silver wheels that didn’t match the rusted gas tank or muffler that Jeno was now saving to restore among other things. The black leather seat was slightly cracked from wear over the years and the breaks didn’t always work great. His headlight needed a new spark plug and the oil line leaked. Still, with all of these issues, he loved his bike. Each new issue gave him something to work on at night in his father's tiny little garage when all he wanted was grease on his chest and a wrench in his hand.

“Let’s go Jeno! I wanna ride!” Donghyuck moaned from his spot on his own bike, revving the engine with his right hand.

Jeno rolled his eyes at Donghyuck’s whining. Out of all of them, he was the one that loved traveling the most. They’d gone all the way up the coast the day they’d let Donghyuck lead them.

Jeno nodded and threw his leg over his bike, kicking the kick start lever and sighing happily as the bike roared to life beneath him. He pushed off his kickstand and allowed it to roll forward.

“Let’s go!” he called.

He rolled to the front of the group before revving the engine and turning onto the main road leaving the beachside snack shack behind.

When Jeno pulled into the driveway of his house, he parked his motorcycle beside his elder brother's black and gold Harley, letting the kickstand rest against the dirt driveway and dismounted..

He made his way into the house where his older brother, Jaehyun, was sitting alone in the living room flipping through channels.

Jeno’s heart hurt. All through the ride, he thought about (y/n) and the pained look in her eyes every time someone teased her. He knew it wasn’t right to bully her, especially for something as shallow as her weight or her clothes, but when the girls Jeno dated began mocking her, Jeno joined in, and pretty soon, she was alone. It hurt that Jeno could have stopped it. He could have kept her as a friend instead of ditching her, and now, here he was, hopelessly in love with the girl he bullied and too afraid to stand up to his friends out of fear that they would dump him.

“I have a problem,” he groaned, flopping down on the couch.

Jaehyun turned the small box television off and turned his attention to Jeno. Jeno rolled his head back on the plush green sofa and sighed.

“There’s this girl I like…” he started.

Jaehyun groaned in disinterest.

“So tell her. Not like you can’t get any girl. I heard you’re one of the kings of your class,” he replied.

Jeno whined. It was true. He could virtually have anyone he wanted, yet the one person he couldn’t have was the one he desired.

“I can’t. My friends wouldn’t approve and she’d never go for me… not after everything I’ve done,” he muttered hopelessly.

“Why do you care so much what your punk friends think? Do what you want, not what they want you to do.”

Jeno sighed. It wasn’t that easy and Jaehyun should know that.

“She’d never go out with me anyway and I can never tell her!” Jeno whined, hoping his brother would understand.

He was far too ashamed to come out and say exactly why she wouldn’t. “There’s girls that don’t like you?” Jaehyun asked, clearly shocked.

Jeno nodded sullenly.

“Just one…”

That seemed to make the links click in Jaehyun’s mind and Jeno wasn’t sure if that was a good or bad thing.

“You don’t mean you like the poor girl you always bully, do you?”

So Jaehyun knew about that. No wonder his brother had grown distant since Jeno had started high school.

“Um… yes…” he mumbled.

Jaehyun shuffled around on the beige chair he was sitting on before one of his dirty socks was being chucked at Jeno’s head.

“Hey!” Jeno snapped.

“You don’t treat people like that! You and your friends are assholes! That poor girl won’t forgive you for what you’ve done to her!” Jaehyun yelled.

Jeno wanted to yell back, but he knew Jaehyun was right. He was an asshole.

“What do I do to get her to like me… I don’t know how to stop this mess…” he mumbled. Jaehyun groaned and grabbed the large remote, flipping the television back on.

“You make things right. Stop bullying the girl and apologize like you mean it. Even then, it may be too late,” Jaehyun answered before his attention was back into the heavy box television.

Jeno sighed. He knew his brother was right.

The next afternoon, Jeno pulled his motorcycle into the parking lot of the snack shack, parking alongside Jisungs rusting brown one he refused to let Jaemin or Jeno strip and repaint.

Jeno dismounted and walked into the shack. His friends were crowded around their usual table, talking loudly.

Jeno walked over to the table and slid into the booth beside Renjun.

“What’d I miss?” he asked.

Jaemin was cackling and fishing ice out of his soda glass.

“(y/n) is on our table today!” he smirked.

Jeno’s heart dropped. That meant they’d be extra cruel to her today and Jeno really couldn’t do anything to tell her or his friends how he felt. The universe must really hate him.

Jaemin got the ice out of his cola glass and held it in his palm, his faze shifting to where (y/n) was shuffling around in her red striped shirt and black pants, wearing those same yellow heels.

“What are you gonna-”

Jeno was cut off as Jaemin smirked and launched the ice cube across the table, getting enough air to fly across the room until it dived down into the low cut v-line of (y/n)’s striped shirt.

“Yes! 10 points!” Jaemin cheered loudly.

(y/n) squeaked at the sudden intrusion of ice, a sound that Jeno found oddly adorable, even if it wasn’t a good kind of squeak.

Her face flamed red and she hurried back to put her notepad down on the chef’s counter before moving back to their table.

“Can I get you guys anything else?” she asked, her voice having gone up an octave from embarrassment.

“I want a chocolate milkshake,” Renjun answered.

(y/n) jotted it down and moved to look at the rest.

“I want a burger that’s charred on one side, but not too charred. Don’t bring me burnt meat or I’ll make your fatass eat it,” Jaemin said.

Jeno sighed at his friend, shaking his head subtly.

“I want a burger with a dollop of ketchup and three pickles. Don’t you dare give me any more or less than three pickles,” Donghyuck ordered.

Jeno rolled his eyes. Donghyuck didn’t even like pickles.

She glanced at Jisung and Chenle, both who were contently sipping their cola’s and completely ignoring her existence, so, after scribbling down everyone else’s orders, she turned her eyes to Jeno.

“Coke with ten pieces of ice and a burger.”

(y/n) nodded, writing all of the information down and shuffled off to the counter again.

“Do we really have to be that mean to her? She looked like she was going to cry,” Renjun muttered.

Jaemin rolled his eyes.

Jeno nodded in agreement to Renjun. Her face was sullen and her eyes glistened with tears that hadn’t fallen. His heart sank at the thought that maybe something had happened at home or that their words had finally gotten to her. In all the time they’d been bullying her, she never once said anything much to them, and they’d never seen her cry.

“Do you think we should lay off her?” he suggested.

Donghyuck and Jaemin snorted at the same time.

“Why would we do that?” Donghyuck asked.

Jeno shook his head. His friends could be such assholes sometimes. They wouldn’t even stop for someone that seems to be almost crying, they just use it to play more games. More buttons to press.

“If you’re so worried, Jeno, go check on her,” Chenle challenged.

“Yeah, go check on her!” Jaemin cackled.

Jeno shook his head and sighed, getting out of the booth. He knew very well what they expected him to do, or at least, what they wanted him to do, but he didn’t know if he could take calling her names anymore. Not when it felt like his soul was screaming at him not to.

He didn’t have much of a choice as he made his way over to her, however. He couldn’t control what his friends wanted and what he was obligated to give.

He moved up behind her and while her back was turned, he brought his hand down hard on her butt as his friends cackled loudly from their table. Jeno’s ears burned in embarrassment and guilt. If his mother knew what he’d just done, she’d be dragging him out of the snack shack by his ear.

He didn’t really know what to expect from (y/n). What he didn’t expect however, was her body whirling around rapidly, her hand raising angrily, and the sharp stinging sensation across his cheek.

“YOU HAVE NO RIGHT! I HAVE DONE NOTHING TO YOU, AND YET ALL YOU ARE YOUR ASSHOLE BUDDIES WANNA DO IS BULLY ME! WELL PISS OFF! I DON’T NEED THIS!” she screamed.

Jeno’s eyes widened. This was new…

“YOU ARE A BUNCH OF PUNKASS BOYS WITH NOTHING BETTER TO DO, BUT I SWEAR THE NEXT TIME I HEAR A COMMENT ABOUT MY WEIGHT, CLOTHES, OR HAIR, OR ANYONE TOUCHEs ME, I WILL SHOVE MY FAT FOOT UP YOUR BUTTHOLE!” she screamed angrily.

The cackling from the table had stopped as the boys gaped at their waitress in shock.

“AND YOU IDIOTS CAN GET YOUR OWN DAMN BURGERS!”

The snack shack had gone deathly quiet. Jeno stood as still as a statue, face still stinging, but not quite as painful now. The outburst from this usually quiet and reserved girl shocked him to his very core, but it also made him feel worse. Sure, the ice throwing, name calling, and excessively stupid orders had added fuel to the fire, but it was Jeno’s action that had thrown her over the edge.

“I-I’m… sorry…” he stammered out.

“DON’T SAY SORRY TO ME AFTER THE HELL YOU’VE PUT ME THROUGH!” she screamed.

Jeno’s heart pounded in his chest and his eyes gazed at her fearfully.

“I think it’s time you go home, (y/n), calm down and come back tomorrow,” the owner of the snack shack said, walking out of his office.

(y/n) nodded and let out a sniffle. Jeno didn’t know when she’d started crying. She grabbed the bag the owner handed her before running out of the shack.

“And you, young man. You and your boys get out of my shack. You’re all banned for a week. Come back in here acting like that and you’ll be banned permanently,” he said, eyes fixed angrily on Jeno.

Jeno turned to look back at his gang and sighed, waving a hand for them all to follow.

After the incident, Jeno hadn’t felt much like going on a ride with the rest of the gang. They were all perfectly fine, cackling and talking about the outburst, but Jeno couldn’t stomach it. The way she’d screamed. How upset she’d looked. He was done being a bully. Now he just needed to figure out how to go from bully to courting her, if that were even possible.

He parked his bike beside Jaehyun’s again, happy to see his brother was home and not at the rusty body shop he worked at.

He ran into the house, taking the front steps two at a time, and when he was inside, he made his way to the room he shared with Jaehyun.

“I need to borrow your boombox!” he yelled at the male.

Jaehyun, clearly not expecting the sudden intrusion, jumped off the small bed, stuffing the adult rated magazine he’d been “reading” under his mattress. Jeno rolled his eyes. He didn’t have time to find ways to ruin Jaehyun’s relationship with his girlfriend or rat him out to their mother.

“I. need. Your. boom. Box!” he enunciated.

Jaehyun stared at him incredulously.

“Uh… Why?” he asked.

Jeno shook his head angrily and shoved past Jaehyun to siffle through his side of the room searching for the large, heavy, cassette playing boombox his brother had bought a month ago.

“I need it to fix my (y/n) situation!” Jeno explained as he searched.

Jaehyun groaned.

“Movies aren’t real! That won’t work!”

Jeno ignored him. The guy always showed up at the window of the girl he was hoping to impress and the girl always forgave him. It’d work. It had to.

Jeno grabbed the large boombox from beneath Jaehyun’s bed, groaning at the weight. He heard Jaehyun sigh.

“Good luck then.”

Jeno didn’t need it. This would work. It had to work.

The ride to (y/n)’s house had proven to be a bit difficult as he struggled to hold the boombox against him. The box was large and heavy, with a small cassette player at the top that already had his chosen tape resting inside it.

The trip over was one of many stops and repositionings in an attempt not to drop the box that could very well make everything alright. He could just imagine her grinning in glee and running down to meet him, forgiving him for everything he’d ever done to hurt her.

By the time he got to her house, dusk was falling. He had maybe ten minutes before darkness engulfed the sky. Ten minutes in which he’d be tasked with making everything better.

He moved around the side of the common two story house and found (y/n)’s window easily. She appeared to be dancing to the music playing from the vinyl record player he could almost see perched by the window. It brought a smile to his lips. She looked so happy and carefree.

He could watch her all night, but he was here for a reason. He had to apologize for everything he’d ever done and confess.

He found a rock likely from her driveway by her window in the grass and picked it up. It was only one so he had to make it count.

He pressed play on the cassette player portion of the boombox and ‘It’s sad to belong’ came flowing out melodically from the speakers.

”Met you on a springtime day,”

He threw the rock hard against her window, flinching as he heard the rock bounce off. He was surprised it hadn’t broken the window.

”You were mindin’ your life and I was mindin’ mine too. The window opened and Jeno’s heart hammered in his chest.

“(y/f/n) (y/l/n)! I am so in love with you it hurts. I am so sorry for everything I’ve ever done to hurt you! All the bullying. All the teasing. I’m so sorry. You’re not fat or ugly! You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen! I just couldn’t show it! But I don’t care what my friends think! I love you! I want to be with you! I want to court you! Please forgive me!” he pleaded, not giving the girl a chance to say anything.

When he finished speaking, the song was nearing an end and his body was shaking. The girl looked almost close to tears again and Jeno grew hopeful that in any second, she’d run downstairs and jump into his arms.

“Yes it’s sad to belong to someone else when the right one comes along.”

“You love me huh? Well you have a funny way of showing it,” she sneered.

The window slammed shut and the drapes were immediately dropped, leaving Jeno alone in the darkness of the evening, his hopes dashed across the grass.

He’d waited too long to apologize.

150 notes · View notes

hanoella · 3 years

Text

Affettuoso- With Feeling (Part 3)

Pairing: Bucky x Pianist!Reader

Set after the events of TFATWS: In an effort to start over and make a home in Louisiana, Bucky meets a friend of Sam’s who ends up being his landlord. With only a driveway to separate them, he finds that he’s not the only one looking for a fresh start.

Series tags/warnings: Slow Burn, Eventual Bucky x Reader, Mentions of Domestic Abuse, Canon Level Violence

Part 3 Word Count: 3k

A/N: Can you tell I don't really have a posting schedule? lol. I also introduced links to the specific pieces I had in mind. I'm using soundcloud because I don't think everyone has access to spotify. Trying to be reader friendly! This can be read with or without the audio, as I do my best to still convey the thought in the fic. Though if you can, I highly recommend :)

Thanks again for all your support! Every heart and comment motivates me and is just so wonderful

Read Part 1; Masterlist

---

A few days had passed since the night that Bucky had overheard your troubles. It had been quiet since, and you hadn’t left the house. The curtains were opened during the day and closed at night, the only telltale signs that you existed.

Doesn’t she have to work? Bucky thought to himself. He speculated all the different possibilities as he used the riding mower around the property. Maybe you were an heiress? You seemed pretty down to earth though. Or maybe you sold a patented idea for a ton of money. All this land had to have been expensive. And to not request actual money from him?

He eyed up the width of the gate for your fence. The riding mower couldn’t fit so he would have to use a push mower for your fenced off yard. He hadn’t seen one in the garage. Maybe the old shed at the back of your yard had one? Bucky parked the mower in the garage, taking a moment to make a mental list of everything. Depending on if he found anything in the shed, he might need to buy a few basic tools and a chainsaw for that fallen tree.

He walked out of the garage and over to the shed. The leaves were changing color and it brought a whole new atmosphere to the secluded forest area. Opening the gate of the weathered white fence, he looked around to see if you were out. No signs of life. Entering the yard and closing the gate behind him, he started walking to the back. Halfway through, he stopped at the fire pit. The grey stone blocks were starting to crumble, with a few of the bricks having fallen off. It would probably be really nice if he got a little bit of cement mix and filled in the gaps. Bucky made another mental note.

The shed had no padlock so he was able to open it with no problem. Amongst the cobwebs and bags of soil, was an older green push mower that looked like it might work. He gave the gas a pull and got no response back. Looking underneath, Bucky saw what might be the problem. He’d have to take a closer look later. Putting the lawn mower back onto its wheels, he pushed it across the yard, pausing when he saw movement though the glass doors of the back patio.

Craning his neck to avoid the glare, he saw you sitting at your fancy full keyboard. The way the piano was against the opposite wall, your back was to him. You had big over-ear headphones plugged into it, so he couldn’t hear the sound but he saw the flurry of keys being pressed down. Whatever you were playing, you played passionately. Hands and arms gracefully moved despite the speed at which they were moving. Enhanced hearing coming into play, he heard the muffled clicks of the fluttering keys. Suddenly, you pressed down forcefully, holding whatever chord you had struck as your shoulders gently relaxed. A deep breath. Arm creating a graceful arc as if you had studied ballet, you pressed gently on another chord. And another. Bucky counted three more times you did this before you let your hands gently fall from the keys to your lap. Several moments passed before slid the headphones off of your ears to sit wrapped around your neck. Another deep breath. This time as the breath escaped you, you stayed slouched, head tilting up to stare at nothing on the wall.

A buzz broke Bucky from his trance.

“Call me, new mission” The text from Sam on his home screen said.

He pocketed his phone, glancing through the glass one more time. There you still sat.

Unmoving.

---

The roar of the plane’s engine was just loud enough to drown out Bucky’s thoughts without being annoying. If it weren’t for the adrenaline of the recovery mission under the cover of nightfall, he probably would’ve been lulled to sleep. Beside him sat Sam, looking on his phone for the exact coordinates of the politician they had been sent to rescue.

“Here it is. I’m assuming there’s some sort of underground base since there are no heat signatures anywhere within the radius where he was taken. It should take us about ten more minutes before we’re directly over it.”

Bucky hummed in acknowledgement.

Sam raised an eyebrow. “Earth to Bucky.”

“What does your friend do?” Bucky asked suddenly, sitting up straighter and turning towards him.

“… What?”

“What does she do? I’ve never seen her leave the house. Is she okay?”

“If you’re asking why she doesn’t leave the house, it’s because her contract doesn’t start for a while. She’s technically still supposed to be in physical therapy but she hasn’t found a place yet. You know, your whole routine gets messed up when you move.”

“For her shoulder?”

Now it was Sam’s turn to look at Bucky, trying to decipher the motive behind these questions. Bucky shifted his weight in the chair, antsy under the scrutiny.

“Never mind, I-”

“Yes, for her shoulder.” Sam said, cutting him off. He stopped himself from asking why Bucky wanted to know. There was an awkward pause before Bucky explained himself.

“I just wanted to know. I’m not used to seeing people so…”

“Similar to yourself?”

“I was gonna say isolated but fair point.” Bucky admitted. Sam leaned back in his chair, looking straight forward.

“She’s been through a lot… I know you heard some of it.”

Bucky blinked in surprise.

“I realized the window was open when I could hear you drive off.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“It’s alright, it’s good that you know.” Sam said as he held up his hand to cut Bucky off.

“She’s just trying to get a fresh start. She’s in a raw emotional space and in the meantime is a little skittish. Just like someone else I know.” Sam jabbed his elbow into Bucky’s side as he enunciated the last sentence.

“Okay, okay, I get it. I’m trying!” He shouted as he held one hand up defensively and using the other to block the second jab Sam was trying to get in. Sam chuckled and then stood up, grabbing a parachute pack and tossing it at Bucky, who caught it without even looking.

“Figured you might wanna try an actual chute this time.”

Bucky rolled his eyes and mouthed Sam’s words mockingly with a grimace as he put the backpack on. Clipping it into place, he joined Sam at the side door of the plane.

“She used to play in an orchestra you know.” Sam said wistfully. “The piano. That’s actually how we met. She had volunteered to play a small concert before the dinner. It really helped raise a lot of money for the VA.”

Bucky stayed silent, prompting him to continue.

“Then that bastard she was engaged to beat her and then shoved her down a set of concrete steps when she tried to leave him. It was like a month after we all came back. She was in the hospital for a while. Broken ribs, broken shoulder, and a nasty concussion to boot. Neighbor saw the whole thing and called the cops but the courts were so backed up and the case fell through the cracks. Wouldn’t leave her alone after he got out. So, I pulled some strings and helped her move down here on the fly.”

“… That’s terrible.”

Bucky didn’t know what to say or how to react. They stood in silence, taking a moment to pay a respect of sorts to the trials you have been through. Then Sam broke the silence.

“She just needs time to heal in more ways than one. But she’s strong. Resilient.”

Putting a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, he squeezed it lightly with reassurance.

“Reminds me of someone else I know.” Sam said, finishing the conversation and pulling his goggles over his eyes, giving Bucky the opportunity to take the compliment without feeling too on the spot.

Pulling the door open, Sam shouted over the wind.

“Ready?”

Bucky nodded. Sam jumped from the plane and deployed the wings, the shield shining in the moonlight. Bucky jumped right behind him, using the glint of the silver star to guide his descent as he followed the man that gave the shield its meaning.

---

You laid with your head down on the kitchen table, letting the last golden rays of sun warm the side of your face. You were exhausted from going to physical therapy, especially since today had been the first appointment. All the measurements, all the exercises, all the stretching.

All the questions.

“So, how did you break your shoulder?” the young blonde physical therapist asked.

“Ah, I… fell down some stairs.” You said, looking down at your hands in your lap.

She didn’t look up from the papers, instead just raising an eyebrow.

“You also cracked some ribs and had a concussion?”

“… They were concrete.”

She looked up from the papers at you, analyzing. Her gaze softened and she asked no further questions on how these serious injuries had been obtained.

“Let’s look at your range of motion.”

You had practically stumbled into the house, kicking off your sneakers and plopping down at the kitchen table. Minutes passed by as you regained your breath, heartbeat steadying. The house was slightly cold since you had turned the heat down this morning. As your sweat cooled, you wrapped your arms around your legs in an attempt to keep you warm without getting up.

The sun feels so warm… You thought to yourself drowsily, feeling slightly less lonely. The sun was a cheap substitute for the warmth of a partner…

---

You jolted upright, the kitchen dark and cold. Neck and shoulder stiff from the awkward position you had dozed off in. Feeling the dryness of your mouth, you got up, stretching your neck gently while you walked to the fridge to get water. Chugging about half the bottle, you squinted at the clock. You had been asleep for about forty-five minutes. Groaning, you put the bottle down on the counter and walked into the living room to close the curtains. Grabbing one in each hand, you went to pull them together when you hesitated, noticing that Bucky’s apartment was dark for the third day in a row. The sleek motorbike that was usually parked under the slight overhang of the garage was missing as well.

He was probably on a mission, right? Not that it was any of your business. You shut the curtains and turned off the lights before lightly padded down the hall, stopping to adjust the thermostat. The heat kicked on, sending a puff of cold air your way. You shivered as you walked with a quickened pace to your room, shutting the door and heading into the master bathroom, turning the hot water on with just a tad of cold.

Waiting for the shower to warm up, you leaned over the sink and looked into the mirror. Dark circles under your eyes. Small scar on the bridge of your nose. Running your hand through the roots of your hair, you felt for the scar where the stitches had been. When was the last time you had a haircut? Or put on some makeup?

Some higher being must’ve felt pity for you since the steam from the shower fogged the glass, preventing you from tearing yourself apart any further. Stepping underneath the warm stream, you let the warmth seep into your muscles, then bones, filling every fracture and break with a temporary sense of wholeness until the emptiness of your heart and home caused it slowly to drip out until it, along with you, was gone.

---

The next morning, you weren’t motivated to do anything. You lounged around the house, sipping on coffee and browsing on your phone for furniture, clothes, even sneaking a peak at some pianos. Wanting to invest in one you’d use for the next several decades, you had put off buying one until the money from your contract with the orchestra started in a month. You were still well off, nowhere near struggling and probably wouldn’t ever be unless you decided to buy a mansion (which was a no). You just wanted to be careful.

In the afternoon, you popped a pain killer and muscle relaxer in preparation for the few hours you wanted to practice. Thirty minutes went by and the ever-present ache in your shoulder calmed enough to let you practice with relative peace. Sitting on the bench in front of the keyboard, you pondered what you might play to warm up.

Hmm, maybe a Chopin prelude? Short, emotional, familiar.

Your left hand held the soft deep chords as your right hand softly flitted around the higher notes. Breathing in and out with the music, you tried to ignore the ache that start to surround your shoulder.

Playing the last few notes, you paused before reaching over to the bottle of painkillers.

---

Shortly after finishing up, you dragged a small table outside next to the wooden bench swing that was hanging on the porch. Bundled up in a soft sweatshirt, long-sleeve shirt, wool lined leggings, fuzzy socks and slippers, you brought out your hot tea, several blankets, a pillow, and a book you had been meaning to read for months. You were determined to do something besides practice, watch TV, and scroll on your phone.

You settled onto the bench, wrapping the blanket around you, nice and toasty from the layers trapping in the heat of a thorough practice session. The extra medication had really helped keep the pain at bay. Tentatively sipping the steaming cup, you closed your eyes to further appreciate the sweet tones of peach and honey. Setting the cup in your lap with one hand, you used your other hand to flip open to the first page.

---

Bucky hadn’t expected the mission to get so complicated. Finding the base was one thing, navigating in and out of the expansive maze was another. It took a few days to successfully get the target out and back to the embassy. He hadn’t properly slept during that time due to taking shifts with Sam. Not that it was any different from how he slept at home.

The sun was letting its last few rays bless the earth when he turned onto the driveway. Taking it easy on the gravel, he eased his posture and slowed the bike. He put pressure on the brakes as he made it past the final wall of trees that hid the water that was reflecting the last bit of color left in the sky. Rolling casually into a stop, he parked and let out a deep breath, shoulders sinking.

A stray bird calling out turned his attention in the direction of your house. The porch light was on. That’s new, he thought. Squinting his eyes, he saw a bundle on the porch swing. Was that you? Quietly walking over while taking his leather gloves off, he confirmed his suspicions. There you were, lying on your side propped up by a large fuzzy pillow. Eyes closed and breathing rhythmically. Scanning the scene, he noticed the mug on the side table, empty except for the used teabag. Your book was closed, the page you were on marked by one of your fingers. You must’ve fallen asleep while reading.

“Hey…” Bucky said gently. No response besides a small nose scrunch.

He repeated himself a little louder, squatting to be at eye level while gently setting his hand on your arm and shaking you lightly. You groaned this time, eyes fluttering open, taking a moment to focus. You squinted and pushed yourself up into a sitting position, losing your place in the book and attempting to blink the heavy drowsiness from your eyes.

“Bucky?” You questioned hoarsely as you met his eyes. He was still crouching so you were looking slightly down at him. Brow furrowed, you searched the blue of his eyes before looking around to see how dark it had gotten. As you turned your head back to him, he stood back up, scratching the back of his neck just to occupy his hands.

“It’s starting to get cold. I didn’t want you to spend the rest of the night out here.” He explained, choosing to look out at the water, now dark. When he turned his head back, you had also turned your head to look at the water, exposing the side of your neck, the tendons and clavicle accentuated by the strain. Bucky swallowed and your eyes met his, oblivious.

“Ah, thank you. I must’ve fallen asleep reading. I just started going back to physical therapy so I’ve just been so wiped… Anyway,” you said, dismissing yourself mid-thought. He didn’t want to hear about all that. “…did you just come back from a mission?” You eyed the diagonal cuts of leather on his jacket, noting the missing sleeve that exposed the glint of the metal.

“Yeah. I was gone for a few days.”

“Okay. I’m glad you’re home safe.” You mindlessly said, picking up the book and other various items strewn about.

Home safe. What an unfamiliar phrase.

As the words echoed in his mind, you had opened the door and stepped in, turning your head slightly to look back at him.

“Thanks again… Good night.”

“Good night.” Bucky replied, watching as you shut the door softly behind you.

Slowly walking down the porch steps, he crossed the driveway to the garage. Turning his head just in time to see the last light turn off in your house, he stood with his hand on the knob, meditating on the effect that one short sentence had on him.

Glad you’re home safe. Was this what it was like when you had someone waiting on you at home? The tired eyes and gentle smile. Would that be what it was like when he came home in the middle of a night from a mission when he had someone to share a bed with? Gently shaking them to let them know he was home? Or would he try to sneak into bed without waking them? He tried to imagine what that sort of intimacy would be like as he entered his apartment and then his room. Unzipping his jacket and tossing it over a chair, he stripped down to his boxer briefs and climbed into bed, wondering what it would be like if it was already warm.

#bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky imagine #SoundCloud

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deiliamedlini · 3 years

Text

WIP Wednesday

I’ve mostly been just writing the newest pirate chapter that I posted yesterday (subtle plug hahaha), but this was what I was working on just before. This is from the same fic as this WIP Wednesday. I don’t want to post this one yet because it still kind of sucks (like this, which is not edited at all), so I’m still fixing everything I have so far before actually posting. But today isn’t called Post a Fic Wednesday, it’s called WIP Wednesday, and this is a WIP!

Essentially, Link is tasked with training Zelda to defend herself after a series of Yiga attacks on her life. After some time, they’ve become good friends. She has him come to her room for lessons she doesn’t want ‘on the record’ basically, which is why Link is chilling in her room in this section. Totally not to make things unnecessarily dramatic.

~~~

When Link arrived that night, Zelda wasn’t in her room. He poked around for a moment just to make sure, and then relented to sit on her bed to wait for her, setting down his belt on the chest at the foot of her bed as he always did.

It was unusual that she wasn’t there. However, for the past several days, he’d been finding her waiting for him at the window, usually watching him scale the building with a look that betrayed her awe and her horror.

By her bedside were notebooks and tombs, all with marked pages. They ranged from geography, to biology. His hand reached out to take a book about plants, but he heard footsteps in the hall, followed by the booming voice of King Rhoam.

“Shit,” he muttered, looking around quickly before he slid into the closet just as Zelda’s door opened.

“—with the new treaty. I think that would be useful.”

“Yes,” Zelda agreed, softer than her father. “I think that would work, but we’d have to find a way to incorporate the Gerudo as well. Urbosa is instrumental, and I don’t believe we should keep her out.”

“That’s favoritism.”

“That’s being practical,” she challenged.

Rhoam chuckled. “You are learning well, Zelda. We will contact Urbosa immediately to inform her and see her position.”

“Thank you.”

“Well,” Rhoam said, “I’m going to head to bed now. Is there anything you need, or are you all set?”

“I’m fine; thank you.”

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” he said wistfully.

“Since the Yiga attack? Yes, quite a while.”

“I’m sorry I haven’t been as attentive.”

“No, but it’s really okay. I know the thought is there.”

There was the sound of rustling fabric that Link assumed was Rhoam hugging Zelda.

Then, “What’s that?”

Link peeked his head out to see what the king meant, and when he saw his belt still on Zelda’s trunk, he groaned as quietly as possible.

Zelda was fast, though. Her eyes darted around, looking for him, but she simply tsked, a lie springing to her lips far too easily. “It’s Link’s. He left it after we trained, and I didn’t feel like searching for him afterwards, so I just brought it back with me. I’m going to return it in the morning.”

“Ah,” Rhoam said, picking it up. “You should have gotten it back to him immediately. Looks like there’s some stuff he needs on here. I’m surprised he didn’t seek you out.”

Zelda swallowed and shrugged. “He’s diligent. Maybe he didn’t want to leave his post. Or he has spares. Or, most likely, he knew I’d just return it in the morning.”

“Hrmm, true.” Rhoam examined one of the daggers. “You should keep it in your wardrobe rather than laying around. What if someone did manage to get in here? A Yiga, or some other threat? Then you’ve just left a whole arsenal at the foot of your bed.”

“Then I’d just have weapons at my disposal to defend myself.” Zelda took it and made her way to her closet. “But I understand your point, father. You’re paranoid but—” Zelda yelped in surprise at the sight of Link innocently standing hidden in the closet, his head between two of her dresses.

“Zelda?” her father asked, hurriedly turning to her. “What is it?”

With a quick motion, Zelda pulled the dagger out just a bit and slid her thumb along it.

She turned to Rhoam with a light stream of blood moving down her wrist. “I cut myself. Don’t worry.” Handing Link his belt, as if she were hanging it up, she closed the door, giving him an exasperated look as she did.

Rhoam bit his lip nervously and handed her a nearby cloth. “Good thing you two haven’t covered blades yet. Make sure Link gives you all the safety protocols first. We don’t want that to happen on a larger scale.”

“Yes, father. I know.”

“Need any help with that, or are you all set?”

“I’m just going to wash it out. It’s fine, but thank you.”

“Okay then. Goodnight, Zelda. May the Goddess watch over your sleep.”

“Goodnight, father.”

Rhoam looked her over one more time before closing the door behind him with a tell-tale thud.

Zelda breathed out a sigh of relief. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”

Stepping out of the closet, Link grinned at her and tossed his belt right back onto the chest at the foot of her bed. “You were late.”

“I’m the Princess of Hyrule. I’m not late.”

“Terrible logic,” he said, snorting. But he grabbed a wash basin and brought it to her.

“Thanks.”

He watched her dip her hand into the water and flinch as it lapped over her wound. Resisting the urge to help her, he grabbed the top book from her pile instead.

“No, wait!” Zelda said, crossing the room quickly to try to snatch the book from him, hand dripping still.

“Plants and Horticulture of Hyrule Field.” He raised his eyebrow and flipped to her bookmark. “Are you planning to start a gard—oh!” A grin spread over his face as he read the words on the page. “Guardian technology? Hoarding your blasphemous texts, are we? Are you going to start tinkering with them again?”

“You know I’m not allowed to, so give it back!” Zelda burned red and grabbed his arm to try to pull at him, but with one hand, it was a losing fight. Still, she tried feebly, knowing he’d already seen it, so there wasn’t much reason to really fight anyway. It wasn’t as if he was going to rat her out either. She was simply at the mercy of his teasing for a few moments.

“How did you even get ahold of this?” he chuckled, turning the page at random as his eyes scanned over the words. “Isn’t half of this stuff forbidden to be this close to the castle?”

But they both answered at once, the obvious answer hitting him immediately as Zelda was ready to confess: “Purah.”

This time, Zelda just crossed her arms. “I wanted to… experiment. So, I have a fake cover on it in case someone nosey decides to grab the book! You know my father is paranoid.”

“I do know that.”

“It’s just harmless fun!” she said, still feeling the need to defend herself and her thick tomb. “I’m never allowed to have fun, especially with the books they make me read. I want to read about the blast radius the Guardians have while powered by a massive ancient core! And I want to know the components of a Sheikah slate, so, so badly. My father won’t let me do any of it. I just want to read something that isn’t so political!”

Link hummed and nodded. “That’s true. Those books are the worst. My favorite was, gods, what was it called? An Economic History of the Merchant’s Guild of Hyrule. That’s the one that only spit out rupee facts that you kept telling me, right?”

She blushed a bit more fiercely this time at the level of attention Link had paid her without her realizing, and she pushed him by the arm. “Okay, get out.”

He watched her turn redder by the minute and turned back to her to tap his fingers against the hardcover book tucked in her arms. “You know I’m not making fun of you, right? I think it’s admirable how much you prepare.”

Letting out a breath, she threw herself back onto the bed and slammed her book into her forehead with a groan.

Link chuckled and pried the book from her hands. “I’m serious. You’ll make a good queen.”

Her eyes suddenly darted up to his. She wasn’t sure she’d ever heard anyone tell her that, except maybe her father during her moments of absolute despair when he knew she needed to be cheered up.

Flipping the pages of the Guardian text, Link narrowed his eyes, flipped another page, glanced at her, and then flipped the page again. He waved the book in front of her face. “You wonder why the Goddess doesn’t like you; it’s because you write in your books. Ink is permanent you know.”

She ripped the book from his hand and hit him in the arm with it, doing her best not to let her laugh at his jab break through her angry façade. “I’m aware.”

Watching a drop of blood trail down her finger, Link reached out and cupped her hand in his just before the long trail dropped onto the page. “That’ll stain almost as much as ink. You should wrap that up.”

Zelda let him lead her back to the water, keeping the blood in his hand until they were safe. He dipped his hands in first and shook them out, noticing that there was only one rag.

“Thank you.”

“You really shouldn’t have done that, you know,” Link said, watching the water turn redder.

“I had to think fast, okay? Try ‘thank you for not letting me get caught in your closet, Zelda.’ If I can do it, so can you.”

“Fine. Thank you. I appreciate you covering for me, but you didn’t have to injure yourself to cause an appropriate distraction.”

“You’re so annoying,” she breathed. “End it at ‘thank you.’”

“Why do you put up with me?” Link laughed, handing her the rag.

She wrapped it around her finger, letting the wound clot. “Because.”

“Because--?”

“Because. Because I just do.”

“That makes no sense.”

“Fine. Because I think you’re amusing. Whether that’s a good thing or not is dependent on the situation.”

Link grinned softly, barely noticeable in anything but his eyes.

Zelda watched him, content in their mutual silence.

But even that had to end.

After her cut had stopped bleeding, Zelda pointed to the empty space in the room. “Okay. Get on the ground.”

“Demands, demands, Princess.”

#wip wednesday #legend of zelda #botw au #pre-calamity au #link #zelda #zelink #writing #I have an innuendo issue in this fic which includes the title. Oops

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kueble · 4 years

Text

Fic Masterlist

I hit the 100 link limit and need to reformat this. All works on Ao3, though! Best option for finding things is that. Sorry!

Please read my Prompts FAQ before prompting me.

My Ao3 profile - Everything is posted here, too. Also includes a few fics that were not posted to my Tumblr.

My Ko-fi if you'd like to leave me a gift. Anything I earn will support my patreon habit 💟

My ask box is open for prompts! Geraskier, Lambden, and pretty much Jaskier/any witcher(s). Fluffy or smutty, I’ll do my best and let you know if something is a hard no. Thank you!

Fic links under the cut.

Geraskier:

All We Need is Two Good Wheels - Prompt: Didn’t know I was dating a biker.

Post Workout ficlet - Jaskier worked out too much (not on Ao3)

Anything You Want I’ll Give it Up - 18+, daddy kink, butt plugs, public sex.

Distraction - Prompt: kisses meant to distract

Research - Geralt comes out as gray ace.

Tiny Flurries - First snow of the season.

Snowdrops - Prompt: You get flowers tattoos where your soulmate have scars.

The Feeling of Your Skin Locked in my Head - 18+. Jaskier’s head is too noisy. Daddy kink, cock warming, light dom/sub, face-fucking, dirty talk.

Stuck - They were roommates. Thanksgiving eve in 2020.

Secret is to Sing a Little Song - Jaskier’s first winter at Kaer Morhen is a little hectic, but he figures things out.

It Stays on During Sex - 18+ They have a little fun on a hike.

Wide Awake - 18+ Geralt can’t sleep.

Always - Takes place after Research. They take a shower.

There Won’t Be - Jaskier mopes because they had a fight.

Overrated - Gamer!Jaskier

Hope - Jaskier lets some things slip while sick, but it turns out ok.

All Dolled Up - 18+ Jaskier wears lingerie and Geralt really likes it.

Not Good With Words - obligatory post-mountain apology

Do You Remember? - Vampire!Jaskier & Modern Day Witcher

Ask Him - Geralt hates autumn.

Worn Leather - 18+ Geralt acts up and Jaskier has to remind him who is in charge. Also, fun with a belt.

Bit of a Mess - Jaskier helps Geralt deal with a new scar.

Pure Joy - Date night fluff.

Perfect Pair - Jaskier is hurt on a hunt, and Geralt thinks this is how he loses him.

The White Stallion - 18+ Jaskier and centaur Geralt getting together.

Like Vines, We Intertwined - 18+ Geraskier with a side of leshen. (Geralt/Jaskier/Leshen)

A Rush of Copper - 18+ Vampire!Jaskier lets himself go too long without feeding.

Pretty Things - 18+ Dragon!Geralt and thief!Jaskier.

Guilty Pleasure - Ciri drags Geralt to see a local band and Geralt falls for the singer.

How You Want - 18+ Geralt thinks he’s broken, but Jaskier doesn't agree.

Far Too Long - Winter has been far too long.

After the Party - 18+, The morning after Jaskier wins his first Grammys.

Do You? - 18+, basically just nipple play PWP.

Let’s Use Them Up ‘til Every Little Piece Is Gone - 18+ Mass Effect Crossover, with art!

Mint and Celandine - Jaskier has issues with his new scar.

Mating Season - 18+, Geralt usually spends mating season alone, but this year he has Jaskier to help.

Indulgent - 18+, Jaskier books an afternoon at the private baths in the hopes that he can convince Geralt to transform for him.

When I Let the Water Take Me - Jaskier has a secret.

I Wanna Live Life From a New Perspective - 18+ Bodyswap get together.

Overpowering - 18+ Jaskier has a wet dream and Geralt catches it.

Beg For It - 18+ dom/sub, Jaskier knows Geralt can beg for it.

Gone Soft - 18+, Jaskier really likes Geralt’s winter body.

Sugar Me Sweet - 18+, Jaskier and Geralt’s relationship works for them.

No Matter How Lovely - 18+ Geralt isn’t sure why he doesn’t leave the pixie somewhere.

Drenched - Jaskier just got dumped, and Geralt tries to cheer him up.

It’s a Hungry World - 18+ My Big Bang. My beloved. Fae!Jaskier falls in love with the human world, and a witcher along the way.

Christmas Tree Farm Nonsense:

Christmas Tree Farm - Jaskier’s new in town and needs a tree.

Catch You and Keep You on Ice, My Love - Geralt takes Jaskier ice skating.

You Are My Home, My Home For All Seasons - The boys play in the snow.

Sugar & Spice Bingo Card:

But You Would Still Miss Me in Your Bones - “Confessions” Jaskier is unexpectedly dropped at Kaer Morhen.

My house of Stone, Your Ivy Grows - “Meet the Family” Jaskier finds his place at Kaer Morhen

Blackberries - “Anniversary” Jaskier helps Geralt bake for Ciri.

Sun Shower - Geralt and Jaskier get caught in the rain.

Sweet Dreams - 18+ At first, Jaskier isn’t sure what wakes him up

I Shiver in Gold - 18+ Jaskier gets prettied up and they have some fun.

Another - 18+ Geralt indulges Jaskier’s newfound blood kink.

Glowing - 18+ Jaskier accidentally finds out Geralt has a thing for being spanked.

Demon! Geralt AU:

More or Less - Prompt “Can you please stop touching my wings?”

Proposition - Prequel to More or Less. First meeting.

Bring Out Your Fangs - Geralt isn't used to traveling with someone, but perhaps Jaskier isn't so bad.

Intimidating - Jaskier learns about Geralt’s fighting style.

Imagined Flaws and All - Geralt has a rough day and Jaskier can't help making him feel better.

On Soft Sheets Til the Dawn Comes - 18+ After finally getting their act together, Jaskier and Geralt can't wait to reach an inn for the night.

So Pretty When You Cry - 18+ Geralt puts his claws to good use and Jaskier loves every second of it.

Lazy Afternoon - Jaskier is obsessed with Geralt’s tongue.

Geralt x Dandelion (game):

Clandestine - Geralt has an offer for Dandelion.

Jaskier x Eskel:

Too Pretty - Eskel thinks Jaskier is too pretty for him. He’s not.

Mountains - Eskel is in a bit of a funk and Jaskier tries to cheer him up.

Pretty Boy - 18+ Eskel is a pretty boy.

Exactly His Type - 18+ It’s like Eskel is built for Jaskier. Fondly known as the facesitting fic.

I Want This - Jaskier brings Eskel home for Christmas.

It Can Wait - Eskel has a rough day.

Well Played - 18+ Eskel can’t take a hint, so Jaskier decides to seduce him.

Take a Chance on Me - Meet cute prequel to I Want This

If You’ll Let Me - Trans!Eskel isn’t sure he’s what Jaskier wants, but of course he is.

Geralt x Jaskier x Eskel:

Much Nicer - 18+ Geralt and Eskel take Jaskier up to the roof of Kaer Morhen for a bit of fun.

Take Your Pleasure - 18+, Eskel has fun with Jaskier while Geralt watches.

Trying to Keep From Going Under - 18+, Half-Incubus Jaskier needs help getting through his heat.

Geralt x Eskel:

Such a Pretty Picture - 18+ Geralt likes it when Eskel comes back to him well used and ready for more.

Lambert x Aiden:

Night Swimming - Lambert takes care of Aiden when he’s a bit crazier than normal.

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas - Domestic fic in which Aiden sings horrible Christmas songs and Lambert loves him anyway.

My Sweet Dumb Wolf - 18+ Turns out Aiden <I>has</I> been flirting with him.

Comfort - Aiden wants some cuddles and Lambert is an idiot.

A Coffee Would Be Nice - Soulmate au.

Mild Inconvenience - Lambert helps Aiden get out of trouble.

Done For - 18+ Lambert goes to see Aiden's band for the first time and it's more than he planned for.

Found Out - Aiden and Lambert aren’t as sneaky as they think.

Sunny Side Up - 18+ Oviposition, Aiden needs help during his mating season.

Put it on My Back - Aiden takes care of a depressed Lambert.

Graduation - Aiden helps Lambert calm down.

Rubies in the Sun - Aiden had made him promise that if he ever got seriously hurt, he’d get him into the nearest body of water.

Bright Orange - 18+ Aiden gets dosed with sex pollen and Lambert helps him.

Jaskier x Dandelion:

Irresistible - 18+ horny bards. That’s it. That’s the fic.

Self-Indulgent - Jaskier doesn’t want to go back to his own time, not when he can have this.

Triss x Yennefer:

All Day - The ladies talk in bed. Pure fluff.

Geralt x Jaskier x Yennefer:

Completely Unnecessary - Geralt is injured on a hunt and his lovers take care of him.

Jaskier x Valdo:

I May Hate Myself in the Morning - Mature, Jaskier and Valdo always find each other again, even if it’s not meant to last.

Other:

Two Tries - Aro!Ciri piece written for Aro Week 2021. Background Geraskier.

#my fic #masterlist

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nagisasstunningpersonality · 3 years

Text

TINSITOGS, a retrospective (happy birthday)

(yes I’m like two days too late I know I’m sorry)

Why hello followers and ass class fandom, nice to see you there. I’m sure MOST people know about this, but in case you don’t, hi. On AO3 I’m better known as livixbobbiex, writer of maybe one of the most infamous Assassination Classroom fics.

Which I mean like, if you haven’t read it yet you totally should it’s fanlore at this point I promise-

Shameless plug that I don’t need aside, I felt that, on its first birthday since actual completion, I just wanted to share some things about it. Some tit bits about writing it, fun facts, maybe even some author advice TM. I appreciate that it’ll be super annoying if I do that in the tags, though, so that’ll all be under the cut. If you don’t want to read the whole post, then no matter what, thanks for the support in general!

I also want to take the opportunity to announce that I’ve reopened my discord, so if you want to talk about my fics with me (and others), you’re more than welcome to join! (the link is here)

The origin story

I’ve stated this many times, I think, but TINSITOGS was never supposed to be a serious story. Taking you back, quite a long time, it actually started in a facebook DM with a friend. We used to come up with “head canons” with each other, which were basically just very condensed fanfiction plots over a multitude of text messages. I believe I was trying to cheer her up, and I tried to come up with some kind of plot line.

At the time, I was fairly fresh to the Ass Class fandom, and I was joking about how there were no teen pregnancy melodrama fanfictions. It wasn’t that I wanted one, I just thought it was strange for a school centric anime with a bunch of ships to NOT have one. And, back then, I only really cared about karmagisa. So I just decided ‘right it’s happening’. The reason I decided to make it ABO was due to ‘it making sense’. Fun fact: it was almost written as AFAB trans Nagisa, but I decided against it as I didn’t rate my ability to handle it well back then. Looking back on it, I’m glad I made that decision.

Over around two months, writing out the plot of this story took over my life a little bit. I had no idea where I was going with it, but I was having so much fun with the drama that I decided that Karma and Nagisa shouldn’t get together soon at all, and I had a lot of fun teasing my friend with the ‘will they won’t they’. It was only when I got bored that I invented this intense drama plotline to finish it all off.

That period of time was a lot of fun. And whilst that friendship didn’t end well, I still have a lot to thank her for. She chose Daichi’s name because I had no idea, and she wanted to annoy me because I didn’t like Haikyuu. When I couldn’t decide on his hair colour, the purple was her suggestion because ‘why logic?’ Daichi speaking Korean was because of how much she liked Kpop. She even helped me choose the title of the actual fic, so there’s a lot you can thank her for, honestly.

After I finished that story, though, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Whenever I daydreamed, I used to think about that damn Daichi Akabane, and how much I wanted to tell his story. I’d even come up with extra stuff to fill in a lot of the gaps, and developed his character in my mind. I decided that I was really desperate to write it down. Usually that worked when I had an idea I wanted to work through.

I wrote the first chapter in late 2017, and then the next two as well. I just, kept going, and realised that I could go further still. TINSITOGS was never something that was supposed to be shared, but I decided I may as well. After all, that fated ‘teen pregnancy drama’ fic still didn’t exist, and I thought it would be funny to make it happen.

Yes, as I’ve stated publicly a few times, TINSITOGS was a crack fic. If I wanted attention from it, it was infamy. We even joked about me cursing the fandom if it ever became the most popular fic (whoops?). What I wasn’t expecting was a bunch of people, in a fandom where at the time there were NO ongoing karmagisa fics and it was pretty dead, to really seem to enjoy it. It was enough to have me keep writing it, at least. I still don’t know at what point I actually started taking it seriously, but somehow I did, and the rest is history?

The reception

In my wildest dreams, I never thought that I would be the author of one of the most popular fics in the fandom. To this day, the amount of views TINSITOGS has is insanity to me. For the record, across all platforms it’s on today it has 238,000, which is literally a number I can’t even visualise anymore. Almost quarter of a MILLION. To this day on AO3, it’s the most viewed Ass Class fic that’s an ACTUAL ass class fic (the others are multi fandom compilations). So yeah, I achieved the original goal, I guess?

Now you might be wondering, “omg the karmagisa fandom is fujoshi trash”. And, considering the origins, it is kind of funny. The thing is, though, TINSITOGS was written at incredibly good time. It was written when there were, essentially, very few long form Karma/Nagisa stories. If any other fics did get posted on occasion, they were usually just oneshots. I was also, at that point, writing very fast. A symptom of ADHD is becoming obsessively productive over certain things. Since I was able to get a 3k chapter out every few days/once a week, TINSITOGS was consistently bumped to the top of AO3′s default view. And some of those first few chapters were altered canon, and transcribing the canon dialogue didn’t take very long. The more views it got, the more people would read it out of sheer curiosity.

I think it also helps that, at least after it started getting some positive feedback (which was honestly after the pre written chapters), I purposely tried to make it ‘not terrible’. I mean, I personally think the first chapter is pretty weak and if it wasn’t somewhat iconic to a lot of people I’d rewrite it. But in general, I purposely tried to make the world of ABO my own, to make it more accessible to those who don’t like that genre, and stay away from the inherently grosser stuff as much as possible. I genuinely do get comments about how I introduced people to the genre as a whole, still not sure if that’s a GOOD thing but hey, it happened.

TINSITOGS turned into a lot more than just a joke. It turned into my favourite hobby. It turned into a research project (honestly, you would not believe the amount of mummy vlogs and legit scientific articles about child development I consumed). It turned into something that, at least I believe, was widely loved.

Meaning

I think it might be wrong to say that I don’t have AN idea of when I started to take the fic super seriously. For me, it was around the time someone commented something along the lines of saying my writing meant a lot to them, that they’d spent all night reading it and had been unable to put it down.

Not to get too dark here, but I do have a past in writing a very long, somewhat popular fic (it’s still on my fanfic net profile if anyone’s interested, but I don’t recommend it). However, in the latter part of my teenage years, the depression struck. Writing was the love of my life, and I couldn’t bring myself to do it anymore. Maybe I’d be able to muster an idea or even a chapter at the best points of that, but I’d never completely finished any story. Starting to write again was a huge step in my recovery, and one of the reasons I convinced myself that life was worth it was being able to impact someone’s life somehow. Even to this day, I still remember the fics I read when I was, like, thirteen. How much I still remember them, and how much they meant to be at the time. I wanted to be that writer for someone else. To be honest, it was actually Yuri!!! On Ice that got me out of the super bad, but I still never wrote anything of real consequence. TINSITOGS was the first time in a long time I actually committed to something.

And, to be completely honest, there were a lot of times I was tired of it, and wanted to just quit. But, the thing was, I felt like people depended on me in a way. I got so many comments that were just FILLED with support, telling me how much they looked forward to every update. It wasn’t just empty words, either, a lot of the times these comments would be super engaged with the actual writing. I can’t even describe just how much they meant to me, how much I would look forward to reading everyone’s opinions. And then discord happened, which was a lot of fun.

TINSITOGS went a lot further than I ever thought it would. There were comments, discussions, fan art, fan FIC (which is honestly incredible to me). Someone even added it to TV Tropes, at one point. Not to mention the Cards Against Humanity deck and quiz It makes me so unbelievably happy that I could inspire that much creativity, but it’s a two way street. It was all of that which inspired me to write, too.

Writing

The only real goal I actually had was aiming for around 3000 words per chapter. I had a whole facebook log of plot points as planning, and I was mostly just trying to expand on them into prose. I honestly thought that, at its completion, the entire fic would be around 100k words, if that. Not, at one point, being literally the longest ass class fic on AO3.

There are a lot of aspects that were directly adapted from the original messages, and I tried to stay faithful to it more so at first, even if I later removed some of the pure crack. But the style was also vaguely similar, with the story being told mostly from Nagisa’s perspective with swaps to Karma when it made sense. All the main plot beats, too, are pretty much identical. The plus to this was I was able to add a lot of really fun foreshadowing, and I feel like it’s a fun reread because of it.

Honestly though, if there’s a demand to release those OG message logs, I will. Mostly because it’s kind of funny, and interesting to see. Isogai and Nagisa were engaged at one point, even.

Obviously, it changed somewhat. 3000 was the minimum length, and the time to completion was whenever it felt right. One of my big concerns was about pacing, so it took a lot more fleshing out and maybe ‘filler’ content for some of the main arcs to work.

There’s parts of TINSITOGS I don’t think aren’t written that well, and some that I’m still super proud of. I think you can definitely tell there’s a gradual shift in style, and I get a lot more comfortable with writing them as characters as it goes along. To be honest, my pride for the fic overall is what it represents.

It is funny to think about the places it got written in, though. I started it when I worked at McDonalds with no life direction, then it went through my first year of university with me. It’s been written in at least four countries. Aeroplanes, night clubs, long haul buses, a train through the Japanese southern coastline. Even the start of covid. TINSITOGS managed to see a lot. I even turned a scene in (the boat scene during the India chapter with altered names) to my university as a legitimate assignment.

There were also a few messages I wanted to achieve, once I realised I had the platform to put them across. One of them was, obviously, ‘use protection kids’. It was important to me that I didn’t glamorise it too much, and I think that came across. I also wanted to dispute some of the issues with ABO, and subvert the consent issues as much as I could. An arc I really ‘liked’ writing was how abuse doesn’t always look the same way, and that it can be a drawn out change in behaviour. How the most important part of ‘being a good parent’ isn’t perfection, but genuinely loving and doing the best you can for your kid. How love doesn’t solve everything, and effective communication can take a very long time to learn and build a functional relationship. I mean, there definitely was a lot I tried to put in, and you’re free to interpret it all how you want. But, I like to think some people learnt some of these things, at least.

Daichi

Honestly, Daichi developed almost of his own free will. I had a good idea of his appearance, and that he was smart. Writing him from birth until around nine years old (older if you read the sequel fic) pretty much allowed that fluidity. It was really fun to explore a nature vs nurture development, and let his own characteristics speak for themselves.

He’ll always have a special place in my heart.

This is the first image I ever made. When I was trying to figure out what Daichi looked like, I honestly just edited Karma’s hair (pretty well, actually? I’m impressed with my past skill). That’s where the ‘he looks just like Karma’ meme kind of came from.

This was the first image I actually created of Daichi. I THINK it was on rinmaru games mega anime creator or something, but it’s literally not available on the internet anymore as far as I can tell, so I can’t double check. This was in the pre-piccrew days. His eyes are closed because they didn’t have the right tone of goldish/silver.

His sister, Kaguya, didn’t even exist originally, even though I decided on that ending pretty early on. Actually, she was going to be called ‘Irina’ due to some hijinks. Initially, when Karma found out about Irina’s pregnancy, she was going to get super emotional and mad at him and basically force him to name his first born daughter after her. Karma agreed to shut her up, never intending to have another child, so when the surprise second child later came along they had to live with the pain. However, to be honest I just forgot to write in the actual scene that set it all up, and I decided against adding it anywhere else. The name Kaguya was a very last minute decision, and it was a chance for me to explore some ideas that didn’t fit with Daichi’s character.

Interestingly too, Daichi and Nao were never intended to be a thing. I only decided that towards the VERY end. Even though the reason I named Nao that was because of a ship I had in a J Drama (Good Morning Call). It just kind of ended up happening because I won myself over with imagining the cute.

The music

I used to write with a lot of background music, though not all the time. Particularly towards the start, there was a lot that didn’t really make sense thematically, yet I would write to a lot.

Here’s a link to the spotify playlist if you want it it’s basically all the ones I noted I’d listened to a lot. Not including the smut ones, though, I have a whole playlist for that.

Some of the notable ones:

Five String Serenade - the first scene I wrote of the entire fic, in Chapter 25 New Year Time where they fell asleep cuddling.

Cosmic Love - when I wrote Nagisa’s love confession scene in hospital (I also wrote this pretty early on)

Northern Downpour (though it was actually a cover by Emma Blackery) - The chapter after Daichi’s born (30)

When The Party’s Over - Confession Time Third Period, Chapter 69. I literally listened to this song on REPEAT when I planned and wrote the kind of ‘break up’ scene, and it’s one of the few parts that made me cry writing.

Turning Page - I know I said no smut, but this song actually gave me the idea to have the “I love you” in chapter 108 be less on a whim and actually more built up. In the original plan, Karma really did just say it without thinking. I’m glad I changed that.

Bury Me Low and Numb - pretty much all I listened to when writing the last few chapters, because Evil Nagisa core. So much so that Bury Me Low was in my top 2020 songs rewind.

As for the title, there’s actually quite a funny story. I had no idea what to call the fic, and when that happens I usually just try and find some song lyrics. I really wanted to use something from ‘October’ by the Broken Bells. Not only because it’s my favourite song (has been for years), but thematically it really worked. The issue was, it worked as the WHOLE song, there were no individual lyrics that captured everything. And, if they did, they didn’t flow very well. And naming the fic ‘October’ would have been weird for a lot of reasons. There Is No Sweeter Innocence That Our Gentle Sin really was just plucked randomly, in a desperate search to find any snappy lyrics from any song that had some kind of meaning. After a bit of discussion, we settled that it kind of worked... if Daichi is innocent and they committed a sin or something. It also wasn’t the most obvious lyric from the song (Take Me To Church if anyone doesn’t know) so I just went with it. It works out, I think, because TINSITOGS turned out to be a pretty good acronym and pronounceable word in its own right.

The merch redbubble drama

It’s a well known fact that I’m not very good at art. However, I decided to try pixel art because it seemed the easiest to not mess up. I made Karma and Nagisa, before deciding to also give Daichi a try.

This, to this day, is the only good quality art of Daichi that I actually own. The only one I’m actually happy sharing and thinking it doesn’t look terrible. As much as I love people sending me fanart, it’s not ‘my property’, right.

So, I was kind of joking about TINSITOGS having merchandise. At first I just made two funny quote things, and uploaded it to redbubble. I was never intending to actually make money from this, and I’d agreed to myself that if I did, I would just donate it to charity. I was joking with the quotes, but since I had this artwork I figured I may as well uploaded. Separately, there was also an image that had pixel Daichi next to pixel Nagisa and Karma (which I also created).

Aside from showing up in a few people’s adverts across the internet, there was no real harm with this. In fact, I didn’t make money anyway. It was just... more the joke of it existing. I did, however, buy myself a Daichi phone case, which is one of my favourite possessions.

The funny ‘drama’ comes in when they got taken down due to copywrite. Sure, the one with Nagisa and Karma, I understand. But the other three literally had no mention or anything to do with Assassination Classroom, aside from being from a fanfiction. So basically, someone who owns those rights claimed my OC as theirs. Which makes Daichi canon? Whatever the case, I found this hilarious don’t worry.

How has TINSITOGS changed my life?

This is quite a strange thing to think about. Because, in a lot of ways, it really hasn’t. As I’m sure a lot of people know, I don’t really consider myself to have any real ‘fame’, despite the impressive numbers. Whenever I tell people in my personal life, they seem to think I’m some sort of internet celebrity, but that’s never been the case for me. I mean, it’s hardly a cultural phenomenon.

In a lot of ways, I’d much rather befriend someone than have them admire me. Possibly because being someone’s inspiration is kind of weird... I’m just an awkward duck who likes to write after all. I don’t mind it, though. I genuinely find it an honour, even if I don’t necessarily agree. I also want to take this time to say that if anyone ever wants to talk or message me, you’re more than free to do so. I’m usually super casual with people who do that, I promise.

TINSITOGS was the first story I ever finished in the way I truly wanted to. Start to end, a full narrative. And it took a LOT. There were so many times I almost felt like quitting, or took super long breaks. For me, ADHD queen, actually finishing something was a huge deal. And I know I wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t owe it to everyone who read it, and myself, to see it through. You know like, if I were to die tomorrow, at least I’ve left something behind.

In a lot of ways, it’s changed me for the better. It’s helped me develop my writing styles, and way of thinking. It encouraged me to become more active in the fandom, and develop some important friendships. I always feel like my Tumblr and Fanfiction ‘known’ factor is separate. I think most of my Tumblr following is more to do with my theories/Japanese context research if anything, for example, but I know I wouldn’t be so interested in that if TINSITOGS hadn’t lead me to deeply examine character and really look into analysing source material for clues. I also think there’s just... a lot of myself in it.

I was 17 years old, when I first came up with the idea. I finished the story when I was 20. Now, at the time of writing, I’m 21. That time has seen some pretty significant changes - just in general life facts and my own personal human development. For me at least, a lot of that was pretty turbulent, and TINSITOGS stands as a time capsule for that, in a way.

I know I gained a lot of confidence, and it affirmed to me that writing is what I love. Telling stories and sharing them is what I love.

Conclusion

Do I think TINSITOGS is an outstanding piece of writing, or the best fic ever? No. I really don’t. It’s strange to say because I definitely spent a lot of time on it, but it’s not like I put my full unbridled efforts into the story. I don’t fully plan, use a beta, or even read through on my own. And that’s okay - that’s not what I write fanfiction for. Fanfiction is my place to have fun with characters and stories I like, without the pressures of having to stand on my own complete originality. Yes, I’m fully confident that I can write at a “higher quality”, if I really wanted to. I’m also aware that some authors put their full effort into their fics, and that’s just as valid!

It feels odd to say this about my own writing, but I honestly think there’s just something in this story. It might not be written in the best prose ever, and the premise might be kind of dumb for a lot of people. But, I think, there’s some part of this fic that managed to grab people. Somehow, at some point, many readers get captured into the emotions and so drawn in that ‘they just have to finish it now!’ Again, I’m not sure myself how I actually achieved that. Of course, that won’t apply to everyone, but I do feel there’s some truth in it. And it makes me happy, to have caused that.

If TINSITOGS is your favourite fic, or if you genuinely think it’s the best story you’ve read, then thank you. I really appreciate your support, and I’m happy to have been a part of your life, I guess. I know how much fanfics can mean to a person, and that’s why I’m not going to take it down, or edit it at all. And it’s fine too, if you loved the fic for a while and moved on -i t happens. Whatever the case, I’m very honoured to have been able to occupy a moment of your life. Or if you find this fic in 10 years time, even, I still wholly appreciate you.

This story was incredibly important to me, and thank you for reading if it was ever important to you too.

You may ask, what now? Well, this is only intended to be a detailed look back for whoever’s interested, and it’s likely the only one I’ll actually do, a year after completion. Of course, if you ever want to ask me anything or just discuss the story, you’re honestly good to contact me in whatever way I have available.

I’m still writing my ongoing stories, of course, despite taking a small break due to the university work load. I fully intend to complete the stories I’ve already started to tell, at least. After that... I’m not sure if I’ll still write fanfiction. Don’t panic, this isn’t a ‘I’m quitting writing’ thing. I may, however, have bled the Karmagisa genre a bit too dry at that point. Who knows? I am pretty interested in writing something original for once, so maybe that’ll work out.

For now, at least, thank you to anyone who read this fic. To anyone who commented, liked, or interacted with me over it. To anyone who created or learnt from it. I’m really glad that I got to share this story with you all, and ultimately left some kind of mark, no matter how big or small.

Happy birthday, TINSITOGS. I had a lot of fun writing you.

#ass class #assassination classroom #ansatsu kyoushitsu #tinsitogs #karmagisa

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shadowsong26fic · 3 years

Text

Coming Attractions!

A day late, but ah well...

As usual, we’ll go ahead and do an Open Question Night. Which basically means that, while my ask box is always open, tonight I’ll be keeping an eye on it and answering things as they come in. Any fandom or work I’ve talked about here (or posted on AO3) is fair game, as are general questions about writing, etc. I do accept prompts, but I am. Not very good at filling them in a timely manner unless they Immediately spark something, lol.

So, yeah, what’s on your mind?

Also, since I don’t think I have for a couple months, plug for my Discord server! It’s pretty quiet, mostly intended to be a slightly more interactive extension of this space, but you’re welcome to check it out!

Anyway, the usual Coming Attractions details are behind the cut!

PodTogether 2021:

I participated in this challenge for the first time this year, and it was a whole lot of fun! Of Other Suns is a SW/AtLA crossover, and I think it turned out pretty well! My reader/podficcer and I worked pretty closely together during the initial brainstorming process, working out what we wanted to do, and also bounced off one another during the whole editing/finalizing process. There’s a lot that I didn’t end up putting into the fic (because time and length; I am a. Uh. Very wordy writer; the aim was for 6-12k words, we ended up with nearly 15k as it is...), so I might poke more at this specific AU, or crossovers linking up at a different time (either a different point in the SW canon, or in the AtLA canon, or both). I...definitely have extensive headcanons for SW characters as benders of various elements (or nonbenders), and there are at least two Force-sensitive AtLA characters who were outside the scope of the crossover.

Anyway, if you want to check it out...click this link XD (and definitely listen to the podfic too!!! It’s really great)

Precipice:

So, between the final push on PodTogether and some origfic stuff I got done, I...did not get anything finished and posted for this, alas. But! I am saying it here in the hopes that doing so publicly will for once get me to actually stick to a deadline, which is that I will get either the first Protectors chapter or the next Preludes one-shot (or both!) up by this Sunday, September 12. The Protectors chapter will be mostly scene-setting, establishing where various characters are when we open, six years after we last saw our heroes. The Preludes segment will involved Hondo contacting Obi-Wan (and Anakin, who’s with him when he gets the call) about something Relevant To Their Interests.

I will for sure get that Prelude out this month, and hopefully at least two Protectors chapters, but we’ll see how things go at work and how much brain that takes, which is always a factor...anyway, with any luck, I’ll start establishing a Rhythm. I don’t think I’ll be doing weekly updates, the way I did for the first few arcs of Precipice (in part because there are some other longform projects I intend to start putting out and if I am going to do Weekly Fic Posts, I’ll probably alternate), but we’ll see how things go.

AtLA Fic:

Again, I didn’t finish what I wanted to (other than the aforementioned crossover for PodTogether), but I have been working on stuff in the background and, while I’m not going to commit to a Specific Deadline like I am for Precipice, I do plan to post at least the opening chapter of the still-untitled Avatar Zuko AU I’ve been working on this month, so watch this space!

Other Fic Projects:

I’m poking around at what to do for next years SWBB (if only because my wordcounts have been Steadily Increasing and I’d like to get a head start in anticipation of that happening again this year, lol). Still considering exactly what to do, whether I pour all my focus into OFLAM, like I consider every year, or see if I can work up Bail Unfucks the Timeline or another half-plotted AU I have in the back of my head, or go with a different prompt/storyline that occurs to me at some point between now and then, but I’m starting to Actively Ponder things.

I do have that BSG1 crossover outline in the works, I swear XD I’ve got...uh...maybe half to two thirds of the first third of the overall storyline written up? XD It’s a. Uh. Long one. I might go ahead and release it in three parts, just for length/convenience, and because it does more or less have three distinct sections (the initial contact/New Caprica fallout and establishment of the Haven settlement which makes sense in context; the second contact/algae planet; and then an adventure on a resurrection ship to retrieve a Specific Boxed Five and possibly walk away with Ellen because that would just ruin Cavil’s day and I do so love to ruin Cavil’s day, lol). ...I’m going to go ahead and post a preview snippet at the bottom of this post, as Motivation XD

I think that’s all the fanfic stuff I have specific updates for. There’s generally always stuff noodling around in my brain (lately, for Star Wars, AtLA, BSG, or some combination of the three), it’s just how much of it materializes, lol.

At some point, I plan to revisit some BSG epics I had going on (Serenissima; rewriting For Sorrow Sung or doing a slightly different storlyine with the same concept; The Other Battlestar; a few others), but no concrete plans as of yet.

I also kind of want to explore a far-past AtLA setting I designed for a challenge community way back? But I’m not sure if that would work better as an original work with the serial numbers filed off, if I could figure out how I wanted to do that (I have done it before, as I’ll talk about below, but this concept, while not directly involving any characters from Avatar canon as it’s set 2000 years prior to Sozin’s reign, does to an extent lean on the Avatar specifically as a concept, in a way that the other fic I did this with did not).

Original Fic:

Due to a challenge on rainbowfic, I actually got. Quite a bit written? Most of it was not super plot-relevant, but I dropped some Hints about a character in Lux and I got to play in some heads I don’t very often. I might go back to the Regency AU at some point, and there’s a specific reveal I want to write up for a secondary character in The Farglass Cycle, but I haven’t quite figured out how to structure that one, so we’ll see how it goes.

Had an interesting discussion the other day about the way original fiction sometimes starts as fanfic with the serial numbers filed off and...well, a lot of my original stuff starts that way? Or has some roots there, anyway.

Lux doesn’t quite as much, but I definitely ported in at least two characters who started as fanfic characters (leaving aside that this is, y’know, The Apocalypse IN SPACE so, like. Various fandoms that deal with that probably influenced things, plus several key players are Public Domain Characters sooooo), plus some of the way the world is constructed draws on the Native Tongue trilogy and I flat-out stole a concept from Queen of the Damned, though the way it works in this world is different (also, to be fair, I think I’ve seen it in other places, too; but I personally got the idea from there).

The Farglass Cycle and Untitled Intrigues Story, however, straight-up started as fanfic concepts. And I don’t think it’s obvious unless I point out what the source materials were? Farglass, in particular (it’s the AtLA fic I mentioned earlier), because it started as an alternate future and then the map and magic system got reworked, plus the Avatar themself wasn’t even super involved in the original fic context, and while certain characters are very loosely based on AtLA characters, by now they’ve been so altered by the setting that it’s...I used the same archetypes, if that makes sense?

And then Untitled Intrigues Story started as a fusion between two wildly different fandoms, and while one character is a pretty clear expy if you know where he comes from, and another character kept the same actress in my head, I don’t think it’s very clear other than that.

...anyway, not sure where I’m going with that, other than it’s been in my head lately, lol.

...I think that about covers it! What about you guys? What are you all working on? Slash any questions, etc.?

Teaser for BSG1 AU outline, as promised:

So, anyway, SG-1 is prepared for rain and mud and a survivable-but-kinda-unpleasant environment. They’re also prepared for the usual shenanigans--Goa’uld, cranky local politics, weird alien tech that Daniel really should know better than to touch but sends him into another dimension anyway...

Just. Y’know. A normal mission.

They’re...not quite prepared for what they actually find when they step through.

Which is a very tense and now slightly Confused crowd of people, and a firing squad made up of very large killer robots, with a teenage girl as their target.

(One of the large killer robots is. Uh. Well. Half a large killer robot now; that particular Centurion was in the wrong place at the wrong time and got kawooshed in the face. As one does.)

(Said Centurion absolutely wins the ‘Weirdest Death’ pool for the week in Download City, because that is clearly a thing that exists because it entertains me)

There’s a beat where everyone just stares at everyone else, trying to figure out what the hell is going on.

The wormhole disengages.

Daniel takes half a step forward, opens his mouth to start the ‘we are peaceful explorers from Earth and y’all seem to be having a Moment here, sorry for interrupting, but, uh...’

And then the moment end and absolute chaos erupts.

#coming attractions #open question night #shadowsong writes star wars #shadowsong writes atla #shadowsong writes crossovers #shadowsong writes original fic #feedback greatly appreciated

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jiilys · 5 years

Note

hey i was just wondering how you got ur writing so succinct? like i loved the last little thing you posted so much and i think you nailed the characters really well but it’s so short!!!! how did you do it?? it’s incredible i am in awe of you. this is totally vague and i apologize but just any tips you have for doing characterization in a small amount of writing. and if you don’t have any (cuz i know i hardly ever do when people ask me) don’t worry!!! love ur writing regardless it’s amazing 💕✨

hello!!! this is really nice of you to say!!i im sort of having a weird minute with writing because right now i really cant seem to write anything long form, which is something im kind of desperate to get back too. but the bright side for you is that ive been writing a lot of short snippets recently so hopefully i can be of help!! i have deeply no idea what im doing ever, but this is some stuff that guides me when i write

when youre writing something short and you want it to be character driven i really think its best to focus on dialogue. you can tell the most about a person by what they choose to say out loud, not their inner monolouge, so i always try make sure the dialogue is the backbone of the bit.

im aware this kind of contridicts my above statement but when youre trying to build sexual tension between characters its best to focus on the body. what someone looks like when they talk, if their hands move, their jaw locking, all of the stuff you notice when you like someone and their body, like, looms in the room for you. really stupid stuff can be sexy when you like someone that much. e.g.:

“More like I can’t eat jam with Mary in the room cause she’s allergic, but whatever makes you feel good, man.” She gestures with the spoon as she says this, and her shirt sleeve rides up so he can see her wrist. “Jam’s gross.” He says, rather ineloquently. He’s distracted by the wrist. Christ. (x)

Ginny rolled her eyes and shifted to better see the black lake, cold and glittering, two whispering second years walking alongside it. Beside her, Harry’s arm was shielding his eyes from the sun, flexing his hand. Long, bony fingers, slim wrist, wide palm. I must not tell lies. (x)

trying to find a balence between these two is kind of hard, but its all about your character baby!! they normally know where theyre going. for instance, when i write james he normally goes for the joke and loads it with Secret Meaning, where lily goes for the joke if shes trying to avoid Secret Meaning. both of them are funny, they just use humour differently.

i also think when its short you kind of have to boil the character down to the bare essentials. for instance, in all the my short stuff its kind of clear from the word go that james really really (really) likes lily, see these opening lines:

“You look pretty.” James said to Lily, who didn’t (x)

He’s very close to her. Unfairly so. The broom in the supply closet is pressing into her back. They’re definitely going to get caught. “I have a thing for you.” James says, softly. Even in the dark she can see his eyes moving all over her face, nervous. (x)

“Sirius told me,” James said, letting himself be dragged down the eleventh-floor corridor, “that you’re going to blow me in McGonagall’s office” (x)

when its short you dont have the luxury of a long arc when you can dick around for a while. you can start by just throwing your characters in the middle of a weird sitatuation and not worrying about handholding the reader through it. one of the most popular things ive ever written has lily & james in a broom closet, hiding from filch, and you never find out why

basically when its short you dont have of time, is what im saying, to do all the build up and get to know the character. they have to come out swinging and you have to know how they feel from the first few lines

also, for short stuff, i try to avoid characters coming to Earth Shattering Revelations. when ur a real person you rarely have moments where everything just comes together and you Know something you didnt before. youre trying to make your people seem as real as possible, character driven stuff can really work when its just a little slice of someones life. this thing i wrote is just lily getting james a dumb birthday gift, theres so big realisation, its just them having fun and liking each other

sorry this has just been me plugging my own shit, i always feel bad for explaining stuff without linking examples so people can see what i mean. elle @fuckjamespotter has some really good character shit here cause shes the best. ayesha @october31st1981 is also stellar in this fic, which is really dialouge driven.

i hope this was midly helpful!! thank u again!!!

#writing bitching #i have other adviceish asks that i swear im going to get to cause its really nice to be asked stuff like this!!!#i just want to make sure i have time to sit down and like properly answer ur questions u know?? send me anything u want ill help everyone a #Anonymous

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wildflowerswildhorses · 4 years

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hi hi, i hope it’s not a bother but i was wondering if you had any gallagher girls fanfic to recommend?? i (of course) read the entire listen series which just... the talent is insane and basically everything averagejoesolomon has ever written lol. anyway i trust you i love you for posting about gg in quarantine because all i’ve been doing is rereading them for the first time since like 2014... ❤️❤️

Definitely not a bother at all! Any time life gets crazy, I always turn back to these books so it’s no surprised I turned back to them in quarantine.

Sorry it’s taken a bit for me to respond to this, I’ve felt like shit and then had to hunt down all the fics that came to my mind! Though I’ve only ever used fanfiction.net and a03 so my fic knowledge is probably limited.

If I was a better writer, I would definitely do a shameless self plug here; but atlas Though I am proud of this one I wrote about Bex and Zach while Cammie was missing.

This abby/towsend fic sit in osot

This Macey one

Another abby/townsend one

THIS ONE that I literally had to dig for - that follows Cammie through an interesting semester at Georgetown

This Townsend/Abby fic where they were undercover at a comiccon and Townsend was Superman - this one kills ms

There’s probably so many more that I either can’t find, or am forgetting about and I’ll probably link more if I find them; but here’s a start

#laura's got an owl #Anonymous

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p-artsypants · 5 years

Text

Longest Night (16) Struggling

Marinette had thought Highschool had been hard. Right now, in this moment, she'd give anything to go back to those petty arguments and gossip fueled drama. But she couldn't. Instead, she and Adrien were trapped here, being punished, humiliated, tortured, for being heroes, all broadcasted for the world to see. At least she and her kitty were in this together. For now. Whump!Fic

Ao3 | FF.net

Note: This chapter has brief mentions of the previous two chapters. We are in the viewer’s perspective.

—

Hawkmoth. We need to talk. —Salo.

Alya stared at the sentence over and over, her breath hitching in her throat. How could this happen? It couldn’t! It just couldn’t!

“I have to remove this link!” Alya stated. “Max, can I get on your computer?”

“Of course,” he stated, taking out his laptop. “It’s pretty obvious how she posted that. You are using a public server through blogspot, after all.”

“Can you prevent her from doing it again?” She asked, logging into her account.

“Of course. No problem.”

Incorrect username.

Alya clenched her fists. “That bitch kicked me out!”

“Now now, hold on.” Max assured, resting a hand on her shoulder. “Let Markov try.”

“Of course, this will be easy. One moment please.” Markov plugged into the computer, and in a few seconds, the Ladyblog’s dashboard appeared.

“Wonderful! I’ll change my email and password too. After I delete this post!”

It was right up top, in the most plain and boring formatting. Just a white box with black text.

“Huh.” Alya said aloud, staring at it.

“What’s wrong, Al?” Asked Nino.

“There’s no trash icon. No comment section, no share icon, nothing. I can’t edit it or delete it.”

“Allow me,” stated Markov again.

A red triangle with an exclamation point came up on his face. “Whoopsies, we don’t have access to the post.”

“Whaddya mean we don’t have access!? This is my blog, isn’t it?”

“Yes and no.” Said Max. “Everything around this post is your blog. But this box itself is not.”

“Huh?”

“Think of it…as Salo cut a hole in your website and has this in the background, showing through.”

“You can do that?” Asked Nino.

“Not easily, by any means. It’s extremely complicated. I’ve never tried it myself. No need to.”

“So…what do we do?” Alya crossed her arms, looking anxious.

Max screwed up his lip in thought, turning the laptop towards himself. He typed away, a next window coming up. In a flash of textual garbage, too complexed for anyone else to understand, he had a diagnosis. “Okay…well, the post has a slightly different URL, that’s associated with the blog. But it’s being hosted on a private server, which I can’t access. At least not yet. I can try to take it down, but it will take me a few hours, at least.”

“But we don’t have a few hours! Hawkmoth could see this post at any second!”

“I understand. The other thing we could do, is delete the blog in its entirety. Then the post won’t have a URL to associate with and will be unviewable.”

Delete the Ladyblog.

Alya felt sick.

What was two years of hard work in exchange for her friend’s safety? She still had all the videos, all the pictures, she could make a new website, right? One that got Marinette’s approval before every posting.

“Okay—“

“Wait,” said Nino. “Shouldn’t we see where the link goes first? What if it helps the police find them?”

Alya gasped slightly. “I’m glad you thought of that!”

“Markov, initiate Backdraft operations.” Max said.

“Backdraft initiated.”

“What’s backdraft?” Asked Alya.

“It’s simply a protocol I use if I think my presence is being tracked, or I may be counter hacked. It’s basically a fancy firewall.”

“Oh, I see.”

With the class gathered around, Max clicked on the link.

Another window popped up, with a loading wheel. It spun for a moment, then a big red ‘X’ covered the screen and the window closed.

“Hmm…how very interesting.”

“What the heck was that?” Asked Kim, resting his chin on Max’s head like a pest.

“Believe it or not, that was a video chat. But it uses facial recognition to get in.”

“So it’s not going to be helpful to us at all. Huh?”

“I can try to track it. Though it may be difficult since the page closes so quickly.”

Nino whispered as quietly as possible. “Didn’t the detective say he wanted to use your blog to help with the investigation?”

Alya scrunched up her face. Now she had to make two decisions. Stop Hawkmoth, or take the chance and maybe get a lead on Salo.

Any normal person would have gone with the absolute, but Alya was desperate.

“Leave the blog up. Do you think you can track the link?”

“I’ll give it my best shot.” Said Max, honestly.

Alya gave a twitch of a smile.

Something about her conversation with Hawkmoth earlier niggled in her brain. He had addressed her by her name, not as an Akuma. And when she asked him to leave, he left.

Of course, there was no trusting the man, that was obvious, but as far as villains go, she was much more willing to deal with him than Salo.

Alya shook her head. That was an insane thought.

Then the bell rang, and lunch was officially over. Alya and Nino found their seats, now feeling keenly aware that Adrien and Marinette were both absent from class.

“Oh,” said Nino, holding up a pink backpack. “She left it here. Adrien’s is here too.”

Alya smiled fondly. “We’ll carry them back with us.”

—

Miss Bustier was nothing if not understanding. None of the students had their homework done from yesterday, so she just cancelled the assignment. Alya and Nino weren’t given the missed work from this morning either.

She had a feeling they probably wouldn’t be doing it anyways.

Alya had her phone out all day, plugged into a portable charger.

She constantly refreshed the page, hoping for something different.

But no. For hours now, Adrien and Marinette has been hanging by the wrists from chains.

Near the end of the day, Alya looked over to see Marinette speaking to the camera.

She rewound, found the time stamp and raised her hand.

“Yes Alya?”

“Marinette’s saying something! She’s speaking to us!”

“Are you sure?” Miss Bustier asked.

Nino was already next to her, looking at the screen.

“She’s looking right at the camera. I don’t think she’s talking to Adrien.”

“Can I turn on the projector?” Asked Max.

“Well…” Miss Bustier saw the first broadcast. She had turned away the moment Marinette was demanded to strip. She hadn’t watched anything since, and didn’t know if it was safe to show the students.

But looking around, she saw that they were all worried, and eager to see what Marinette had to say.

And so she nodded at Max.

In a matter of seconds, the website was up, and Adrien and Marinette’s states were now visible to the room.

There was a round of gasps.

No one had watched the stream this morning.

“Is that…is that Adrien?” Chloe asked, with choking breath.

Regardless of the state of room, Alya hit play.

Marinette looked around, and then looked directly at the camera. She gave a tired little smile.

“Hey,” she spoke in an absolutely broken voice. “If you’re watching this, you…you’re probably feeling a little hopeless. I don’t blame you. I feel…pretty hopeless too. I mean, I’m…I’m stuck. I’m not sure how I’m going to get out of this. But…but Ladybug always saves the day, right?” She glanced away, choosing her words. “My name is Marinette Dupain-Cheng. I’m 17 years old, and my favorite color is pink. I’m the daughter of the best bakers in Paris, though I might be a little bias.” She smiled slightly. “Before I became Ladybug, I was a normal girl, with a normal life. What made me extraordinary, was my willingness to help others, and my kindness. So Paris, I have a favor to ask:

“Be helpful and kind. Go out of your way do something nice for someone once a day. If you can do this for me, then I know Paris will be safe until we return.”

“I promise.” Alya heard Chloe whisper.

She glanced over to Adrien, then off screen, and then back at the camera. “Maman, Papa...I’m really really sorry I had to hide this from you. I didn’t want to, and some days I thought about how much easer it would be if I just told you. How I could explain the lateness and absences, and my bad grades. But I just had to let you think I was a bad kid. It was for your safety, after all...but despite my best efforts, this still happened, and now you’re in danger. Please get somewhere safe. Leave Paris if you have to. I love you so much. I promise I’ll be out soon.”

Her brow crinkled, as she hesitated. Then, “Alya, I’m sorry too. You…you probably feel kinda betrayed right now. But, like I said, it was for your own safety. You were put in peril so many times because of me. How many more would that have been if Hawkmoth thought you knew my identity? After everything, I hope you finally believe me now...sorry, that was harsh. I...I’ll forgive you, if you forgive me. Deal?”

Alya broke down sobbing. If there was anything else to be heard, she missed it. Of course she forgave Marinette! How could she not? Marinette picked her as Rena Rouge, time and time again!

And what did she do in return?

Stab her in the back.

Some best friend she was.

“Al…” Nino comforted. “It’s alright.”

“It’s not alright!” Alya shouted, startling everyone. She hated how much of a mess she was. She was supposed to be a superhero, damnit! But at this rate, Hawkmoth would try to akumatize her again.

“She’s right, you know.” Said Miss Bustier, rubbing a hand under her eye. “It’s not alright.” She cleared her throat and spoke to the class. “I know things seem bleak right now. And it’s okay to be upset. It’s okay to grieve and to hurt. But it’s never okay to hurt others to make yourself feel better. That’s exactly what Salo is doing. That’s what Hawkmoth has done for years. I know it hurts, and things seem hopeless. But we need to listen to Marinette, to Ladybug. Go out of your way to be kind to someone.”

Alya breathed a sigh. Miss Bustier always knew what to say to make things better.

“Alya, can you come stand with me please?”

She nodded, getting to her feet. Up front, Miss Bustier hugged her, and held her around the waist, as she beckoned each one of her students forward.

“Alya, you’re so smart.”

“You’ve got a wicked sense of humor!”

“You’re really perceptive, and notice things that others don’t!”

“You always put in that extra bit of work to make a project look amazing!”

On and on, each student complimented her, as was custom in Miss Bustier’s class. But all of them were genuine, not just going through the motions.

Except maybe Lila, but still, it was hard to tell. “You are really dedicated to your blog, and put everything on it, to make it just right.”

Alya swallowed. That comment fell flat in comparison to the others.

Chloe came up, a scowl directed in Lila’s direction, then she grabbed Alya by the upper arms. “You are fiercely protective to your friends. No matter who they are. If you feel friendly towards them, you protect them. And that’s something I’ve always admired about you.”

Alya wanted to cry again, but she spared Chloe the satisfaction. “You’re just trying to be nice.”

“Me? Nice? As if!” She scoffed, but they both knew it was true.

“The reason we do these activities,” explained Miss Bustier, “is so that when you see someone having hard time, you take the time to cheer them up. It should be an automatic response.”

“For Marinette and Adrien!” Cheered Kim in the back.

“For Marinette and Adrien!”

—

After school, Alya and Nino gathered their stuff from their lockers. It was time to head back to the Agreste Mansion, for their own safety. Though, the temptation to go out and patrol was strong. Yet the heat was still on, and it wasn’t smart to risk it just quite yet.

“Alya?” A soft voice asked.

It was Choe. And she looked shy. Sabrina was no where to be seen.

“Hey Chloe,” Alya said pleasantly. It felt better to just be nice, like Miss Bustier suggested.

“I…” Chloe started, then she turned away. It took a few tries, each time she started differently. Then, she finally managed out. “I don’t know what to do.”

“What?”

“I…I don’t know what to do. Normally, when I want something, daddy just buys it for me. He takes care of everything. I’ve never been in a situation where I couldn’t have what I wanted. But…but I can’t do that with this. I begged daddy to save them. Both of them. And he tried! He talked to the chief of police and they got in contact with Europol…but basically…there’s nothing they can do. So…I have to do it myself. I have to save them.”

Alya scoffed slightly. “You can’t save them yourself.”

“I have too.” Chloe said right back, her daily stubbornness shining through. “You don’t understand!”

“Chloe…”

“I found the Bee Miraculous. Marinette dropped it, and I found it. Despite all my mistakes, all my insults and my cruelty, Marinette…Marinette let me become Queen Bee. Several times. She threw a party for me, when I felt like no one liked me. She went out of her way to help me reconnect with my mother. And…” She started to sob.

Chloe, it’s me, Ladybug. You can trust me, you can tell me the truth.

You have a purpose.

“She spoke to me in a way no one else had before. She was so…so nice! And she meant it! Only Adrien ever treated me like that! But I was never mean to him!” She sniffed and rubbed her eyes. “That’s why I have to save them! She has to know how sorry I am! How much I appreciate her! And how much Ladybug still means to me!”

Alya was touched. “Why you telling me this?”

“Because you’re the Ladyblogger, duh! You’ve got to know something! Don’t you have a hint to who Rena Rouge are Carapace are? Any way to contact them? I want to help them! As Queen Bee!”

Alya screwed up her lip. “And you don’t care about the attention of being a superhero in the limelight again?”

“Puh-lease, if I cared about attention, I wouldn’t look like this!” She gestured to herself.

Nino snickered. “I didn’t even think you owned a track suit.”

“How do you think I stay in peak physical form? By Instagraming all day?!”

“Still…”

“Fine! It’s Givenchy! Give me a break!”

Alya and Nino shared a look of understanding. Now was the time to use all the help they could get. Alya reached into her bag and pulled out a little black box. “Chloe Bourgeois. This is the Miraculous of the Bee. You will use it for good. Until such a time that Ladybug and Chat Noir are safe, you will keep it safe and protect it.”

“And you won’t put it on your snap story!” Nino added, harshly.

Chloe took the box, reverently. “Are…are you sure?”

“The guardian gave it to us, and told us to give it to you when we felt it was safe.”

Chloe, smiling, opened the lid, and a glittering yellow light appeared.

“Hello my queen!” Pollen sang.

“Pollen!” She scooped her up and held her to her cheek. Then she looked back to Alya and Nino. “When do we start our patrol?”

Alya laughed, happy to see Chloe so eager. “Soon. But we have some catch up to play.”

—

It had never been this hard to akumatize someone.

Granted, Chloe Bourgeois had put up a great fight. But it was nothing like this.

Hawkmoth had assumed Alya would be the perfect candidate to become an Akuma. In all the times he had been around her, granted it was only a handful, she had been absolutely devastated.

Lady WiFi had been amazing, and given her powers of pausing, she would have been great.

But, she was not cooperative. Sure, maybe he could have pushed her a little more, put on the pressure. But it didn’t feel right.

Nothing about this felt right.

And that’s what made him so conflicted.

Because we was willing to do whatever it took to get Emilie back. Exploiting people who were having the worst day, who were in unbearable pain.

So why the hesitation now? This was Adrien, the light of his life. The only family he had left. He loved his son, although he often had a hard time showing it.

He reached out to Nino Lahiffe, who, admittedly, was not as visibly upset as Alya had been, but his hurt was still present. Nino was unbearably calm as he asked Hawkmoth to ‘kindly f—- off.’

Next was Chloe Bourgeois. Surely she would agree, right? She loved Adrien!

Oh but she was nearly feral trying to get rid of him. She yanked on her hair and screamed and cried.

He left quickly, feeling her pain as his own.

He looked at Tom and Sabine, but didn’t have the heart to even try. Ladybug’s parents, now that was cruel.

He was beginning to run out of victims. Gorilla? Nathalie? Himself?

Lila Rossi! She was always ready and willing to be akumatized!

But then, he remembered with growing horror that she hated Marinette Dupain-Cheng. She may try to save Adrien, but she’d leave Marinette all alone to suffer. And that was almost worse.

He dropped his transformation, a dropped to his knees.

“Master? Please don’t cry.”

“I disgust myself.” He whined in the back of his throat. “Why…why can’t I do it? What makes this so different? Am I not desperate enough? Do I not love Adrien enough?!"

Noroo swooped in and nuzzled against Gabriel’s cheek. “You love Adrien plenty. Don’t beat yourself up over having sympathy for others in pain.”

Gabriel swallowed, digesting the kwami’s words. “I suppose...that means there’s hope for me yet.”

The elevator rose, bringing Nathalie into the room. “Sir, Madame Cheng has something to show you on the stream.”

“She found something?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Then we’ll continue this later Noroo, let’s go.”

—

Sabine stood in the lobby, her phone in hand. Thankfully, the stream could be rewound to repeat anything that had happened. And so when Gabriel finally emerged from his office, she went to him, thrust the phone in his face, and pressed play.

“Notausgang.”

“Pardon?”

“Notausgang. Does that word sound familiar?”

“No...it sounds German though. Why?”

“It’s written on the wall behind you.”

“Like Graffiti?”

“No...it looks like it’s supposed to be there. Like a sign.”

“A German sign on the wall? You don’t think...we’re in Germany, do you?”

“I have no clue where we are, but...why else would there be German on the wall?”

“Well, maybe we’re still in France. Maybe not Paris, but Alsace-Lorraine or...”

“Notausgang is German for ‘Emergency Exit’. It’s everywhere in Germany.” Gabriel responded. “Not so much in Alsace-Lorraine. If there’s no French by it, it’s safe to assume they are in Germany.”

Sabine choked. “Oh no…no no no…”

Gabriel rested a calm hand on her arm. “Sabine, it’s alright. This is good. We know we’re looking in the wrong place, and we can tell the detective what we learned. Okay?”

She nodded, wiping her cheeks. “I just…they’re so far…I feel so helpless!”

“I feel the same.” He assured.

And he did. Not only did he have no clue where they were in Germany, but his akumas couldn’t reach farther than Paris. Even if he were to go to Germany, he’d have to spend days hopping around from city to city. And that wasn’t suspicious at all.

Still…if that’s what it took.

First, they’d talk to the detective. Then they’d plan the next move.

#miraculous ladybug #ml #fanfiction #chloe bourgeois #nino lahiffe #alya cesaire #hawkmoth #ladybug #chat noir #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #adrinette #adrienette #longest night

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writingwithadinosaur · 7 years

Text

“Cautious” - Part 4

(Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3)

My Masterlist - Here

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 3,985

Key: Y/N = Your Name, L/N = Your Last Name, H/C = Your Hair Color, E/C = Your Eye Color

Warnings: Some cursing, but nothing else that I could tell.

Summary: Bucky is now pretty much rehabilitated and able to be part of the group. He has nightmares sometimes, but not nearly as much as he used to. Reader was taken by Hydra and made the subject of experiments due to her having powers (something similar to the force, but not the force). The team rescues her after a mission and takes her in. She struggles with control sometimes, is very skittish sometimes, and hasn't talked to anyone since arriving at the tower. She only talks to Bruce Banner. Soon enough, Bucky takes an interest in her. Let’s see how this unfurls.

Author’s Note: Welcome to Part 4! This is a more lengthy part because I really liked this section and wanted to write a lot. I do write stuff like this to be therapeutic, and this helped. I hope others get enjoyment out of it. I have the next couple of parts planned out too. The next few parts are also going to be on the lengthier side.

This is my interpretation of the characters and the reader is one of my own creation. I leave the names and such open so you can put your own name and features in or you can create your own. I know this may not please everyone, but I’m writing this for myself. I hope people will enjoy this fanfic, but I know that you can’t please everyone.

I also want to say thank you to everyone who has shown so much support with the past pieces I’ve written. I didn’t expect to get such a great response from writing. I hope this storyline doesn’t disappoint!

Special shout out to @goodnightwife for being a wonderful beta reader and wonderful person in general! Please go check out her page for some cute fics as well!

If you would like to be tagged in any future pieces, please let me know! And as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

- DreaSaurusREX

Tags: @luciebell-writes @goodnightwife @bexboo616 @bicrypt @mayfeather27

The team was loading their gear into the jet as you made your way into the hangar with Bucky. You wanted to say bye to everyone, even if it was just waving. Bucky went to talk to Steve, you saw them hug like the best friends they were. When Bruce finished securing his stuff, he brought you into a large hug. You had hugged him a few time before, but this was by far one of the best. He pulled away but held your arms.

“I will try to update you whenever we figure out our ETA back home. I have that comm link set up in your room. All you have to do is press the call button and it will direct you to me. If anything happens, let me know and I will do my best to help. I know Bucky seems intimidating sometimes, but I trust him to take care of you. He knows the consequences if he doesn’t.”

You chuckle a bit at that part before hugging him again and saying “I’ll be okay. Just make sure to stay safe, please.”

“I’ll try my best. I got the team to help too, they won’t let anything happen. We gotta get ready for take off. I’ll check in whenever I can.” He kissed your forehead and lightly squeezed your arms before turning his attention to Bucky, who was now standing a couple of feet behind you.

“Be patient with her, and keep her safe.”

“I will do my best, Banner. I’ll update you when needed. Be safe out there.”

With one more wave goodbye to the group, you and Bucky began your walk back to the tower. These next few days were going to be an adventure.

~~~~~~~~

A couple of days ago, Bruce convinced Tony to have your stuff from your apartment in Chicago be shipped to the tower. Since you were going to live with them now, it only made sense. You were still in the process of unpacking it all, and being on crutches didn’t help. Not being able to move with much in your arms was challenging, and you didn’t want to bother Bucky with such a small thing. Sure you had your powers, but they weren’t as strong as they should be. You were focusing more on healing and getting back to normal before really building up your strength with your abilities.

So you sat at your desk and began opening a box that was labeled “Electronics and Miscellaneous”. Your Navy Pier mug with your pens and pencils, a stack of your favorite books, some dvds, your laptop, and a few knickknacks. You pulled your laptop out and thankfully saw the charger next to it. Finding the extension cord, you plugged your charger in and waited for your laptop to boot up. The first thing you did was look at your music. You hadn’t realized how much you missed music until now.

Music was like your own personal time machine. It could take you back to a specific moment in your past or make you think about the future. It could make time fly by or just serve as background music. When you sang along, your thoughts weren’t cluttered or all over the place like usual. You were enveloped in the lyrics and the instruments. You were content, even if only for a brief moment.

You found a playlist of songs that sparked that flame again. You pressed play and began to unpack the rest of the box. At first, you were just humming along to the instruments, then you found your voice. While still kind of quiet, you began singing. No belting or anything, just soft singing in time with the artist. You were surprised at how much of the lyrics you actually remembered. At the end of the song, the box was unpacked. 1 down, 8 more to go.

Little did you know, Bucky had stopped in your doorway and listened in a little bit. He knocked on the door when the song was over. You gasped a bit and jumped back in your seat. “Sorry, doll. I didn’t mean to scare you. I knew you had a lot of boxes to unpack. I was wondering if you wanted any help.” He had that kind and perfect grin on his face that made you swoon. You thought about it and then shook your head yes. “Great! Just let me know what to do, boss.”

You realized that you didn’t have many clean clothes. This was going to be even more difficult if you didn’t speak. “Just fucking go for it, (Y/N). Just talk!” You thought to yourself before speaking out loud.

“Well, I need to find any boxes that are labeled ‘Clothing’ and hang that stuff up or put it in my drawers.” After finding two boxes of clothes, you tried to hang some shirts and dresses in the closet, but the crutches got in the way. Bucky put a hand on your shoulder and suggested that you just sit and fold stuff to put in the dresser next to your bed while telling him what needs to be hung. Being crippled sucked, but you were thankful for Bucky stepping in.

Once both boxes were unpacked and the contents were put away, you looked at your watch. 2:45PM. Bucky usually went and trained at around 3:00. He shouldn’t skip a day of training to help you hang clothes.

“Hey, Bucky? I think I am gonna stop unpacking for today and just rest. You don’t need to stick around all day. Don’t you usually go work out at this time?” You realized how creepy that probably sounded. “I mean- That sounds very stalker-ish. But I’ve seen the schedule posted in the hallway of when everyone trains. I know Steve is at 9AM, Wanda at 2PM, you at 3PM, and I’m just going to stop now…”

Bucky let out a small laugh before sitting next to you and putting a hand on your knee.

“You’re fine, (Y/N)! I know how observant you are. It’s not creepy or weird. I am going to go train though. As long as you’re okay and don’t need my help for the next two hours.” “I’ll be fine. I’m just gonna lay here and watch some videos for a bit.” A nap sounded very nice right now. You had been up since 4AM because of a small nightmare, but you didn’t tell anyone. You were going to talk to Bruce, but then there was the meeting and the sudden departure. You didn’t want to be more of a hassle in a stressful time. Plus, it wasn't a very bad nightmare, you could brush it off.

“Okay. I’ll have my phone on. Call me if you need anything.” And with that, he was off to get changed and train. As much as you would have loved to watch him (as you sometimes did when you were bored), your bed felt very inviting.

~~~~~~~~

The next two days were filled basically waking up, unpacking with help from Bucky from time to time while you found ways of using your powers to help yourself, and bonding with Bucky. You were getting pretty comfortable talking with him. He told you a lot about his life in the 40s and in the present time. You told him about your life before your abduction. You weren’t scared. You actually felt great. Talking and venting to him was amazing.

After these couple of days of unpacking, you were finally on your last box. It was simply labeled “Walls.” It had a poster from a movie premier you went to in your freshman year, some tickets from various movies and concerts, and a few printed pictures that you recognized from your camera.

There was also a colorful tapestry folded at bottom. You got this tapestry during your first week of college, you saw the colors and designs as an interpretation of new beginnings and freedom. Looking at it now, you could see your ability to determine auras was present, even if it was just detecting symbolism in art.

You needed to hang it up on your wall here. The colors still represented those messages to you, just not at a college level anymore.

Bucky was probably getting ready to go train, so you decided to try to hang it by yourself. Without even thinking, you knew you wanted it to flow behind the headboard of your bed. That’s how you had it in your dorm room and how you had it in your apartment when you moved. You grabbed some hooks that stuck to the wall and put them on your nightstand, then you tackled the difficult job of standing on your bed. Somehow you got up and stood up straight without putting too much pressure on your ankle. It was doing better, but still healing.

“There has to be some way I can make this work.” You thought to yourself. Adjusting your focus so part of it was on staying balanced, you felt your powers take hold of you. It felt like little, invisible, stationary cubes were lined around your body. They would shift to form to you, but they would be solid and not move too much. It helped you stay upright without putting your injured ankle down on your bed. No pressure on that ankle, no pain.

Once you felt secure, you kept this line of focus while also making the hooks raise up to your level. You placed one hook on the wall when a very loud voice broke your concentration and balance. You felt all of the invisible cubes suddenly disappear and you started to fall backwards towards the edge of your bed.

“(Y/N)! What the hell are you doing?!” Bucky quickly walked over to the edge of the bed in time to catch you. He sounded so worried, this was new. You knew he cared about making sure you were safe, but never to this point.

“I was trying to hang my tapestry. I was doing okay until you broke my concentration.”

“That looked really unstable. Just… Let me hang it up. I don’t want you to make your ankle worse.” Bucky sat you down in your desk chair. You’ve learned that there really isn’t any debating when it came to Bucky. You wanted to explain how you were using your powers to help yourself, but you were kind of tired from holding your focus that well for that long on your entire body.

~~~~~~~~

It was around 5:45PM, you knew Buck changed his workout time tonight to start at 6:00PM instead of his usual 3:00PM. So right now he was probably getting ready for at least two hours at the gym, a shower, and then dinner.

Dinner. You had an idea. You looked at a black and gold binder in your small bookshelf. You wanted to try your abilities again. The only way that you were going to get stronger and have more control over them would be if you practiced them more. It was just like the water bottle in the jet. You focused your eyes on the binder, held your hand out to grab it, and made it quickly move out of the shelf and into your hand. You forgot how big it was, so you quickly brought up both hands to catch it. Gazing down at the binder in your lap, you had a moment to be proud of yourself, and then began to go through it to try to find one of your favorite recipes.

As soon as you found it, you heard a knock at your door and a familiar face poke through into your room. You shut your binder so Buck didn’t see what was inside. He gave you a funny look but assumed it was nothing and spoke anyways.

“Hey (Y/N). I’m gonna go workout. Do you need anything before I head out?”

“Nope. I think I’m good. I’ll let you know if I change my mind. Thank you.”

With a flash of that great smile of his, he headed out. Time to get your plan in motion.

~~~~~~~~

When you left for college, your mom made a binder full of recipes from your life. Everything from simple chocolate chip cookies to the perfect marinated steak and veggies served with herb butter. Tonight, you were going to keep it on more of the simple side. Your mom used to make these chicken panini sandwiches that you loved. It was just putting a piece of fried chicken between two pieces of french baguette with this marmalade on it, then heating it on a stove top with some sort of press to make it as flat as possible.

You decided to try out your powers again. These new tiny squares were interesting. You got everything out that you would need and put it on the counter. You heated up the stove and found a cast iron presser to put on top of the sandwiches while they cooked. You had also brought your laptop out to play music while you cooked. You had a certain playlist stuck in your head. Why not listen to it while you work in the kitchen?

Once everything was laid out, you took a deep breath, focused on using your powers to hold you steady. You felt them start to line up around your leg and then make their way up to your chest. You left your neck and arms free for obvious reason. The moment of truth, you put your crutches off to the side. There you were, standing straight next to the counter, perfectly balanced.

After a brief minute of adjustment, you got to work on the sandwiches. You forgot how much you missed cooking. The enjoyment your got from the action, the music was easy to sing along to, and the general calmness of the atmosphere overtook your thoughts. You didn’t even hear Bucky go into his room to shower and change, nor did you hear him make his way into the kitchen.

It was a good thing your timing worked out perfectly. As soon as he came into the kitchen and began to lecture you about how it's dangerous for you to do stuff like this with no one around, you held a plate of food out in front of him.

“Did you make this for me?” He looked shocked but kind of happy.

“I don’t see anyone else around. You’ve done more than I ever thought you would for me, so I figured I should try to at least say thank you in more than words.” You pause for a second, taking a deeper breath in, realizing that you felt yourself slipping. The cubes shifting away one by one. “Please take it, I feel myself losing my grip on my balance.” You admitted.

As soon as you said that last part, Bucky took the plate from you, put it on the counter and grabbed your crutches. As soon as you touched the crutches, the cubes vanished and you suddenly felt so exhausted. Once you adjusted yourself on the crutches, he put his hands on your arms to help really stabilize you and shot you a worried look.

“You really shouldn’t have done that without anyone here, doll. You’ve obviously worn yourself out with how much focus it took to not only hold yourself up, but to also cook and such. That being said, this looks amazing. I’m going to grab us some drinks and then take both of our plates to the table. Go sit.” You tried to protest, but Bucky stopped you before you got a word out.

“I’m not gonna argue this, sweetheart. Go sit down.”

You sigh a bit and mutter “fine” under your breath as you make your way to the table. He watched you to make sure you didn’t fall over or anything. Truth was, you were actually super exhausted after all of that, but you didn’t want him to be right.

The first few minutes of dinner are quiet. Both of you eating while you played some instrumental music quietly in the background. It was a soundtrack from a show that you saw as a kid. You were looking down at your laptop to chose a specific song when Bucky looked at you.

You were beautiful inside and out. He loved everything about you. Getting to be close to you these past couple of days just made his thoughts and feelings for you flourish. But he also knew that you were still adapting to this new life and that a relationship would probably do more harm than good right now. He could also tell how much energy it took to do this, and all just to thank him? He really didn’t do much because you’re stubborn and try your hardest to do things for yourself. Did you really not realize that he was doing this all because he wanted to? Because he really cared about you? “(Y/N)? You know you don’t have to thank me for any of what I’m doing right? Now I don’t want to make this weird or uncomfortable, so I apologize ahead of time if it comes out like that. But I volunteered to stay here and help you out as much as possible. To be honest, when I saw you have that mini episode on the jet after we found you, I knew I wanted to help you. I remember what those bastards did to me, and I can’t even imagine what fresh hell they had at that lab. But I do know how hard it is to come back from that. I wanted to get close to you and show you that you can come back. I honestly want to see you grow and become part of the team because I truly care about you.” You honestly didn’t know what to say. He had taken you by surprise with all of that. Another example of you knowing that he cared about you, but you didn’t really know how much. You spend a few moments trying to think of something to say in response.

“That wasn’t weird or uncomfortable. I just… I know you volunteered for all of this, I know you care, but I didn’t really think it was for you. That doesn’t make sense. Give me a sec.” You thought about your words again. “I thought you were volunteering and helping out because you thought the group wanted you to or like it was expected of you. I don’t know if that made it any clearer.”

“I understand you. I also understand that what you said is the totally opposite of what everyone else thought. Everyone thought Steve or Sam would be the first to win your trust after Banner, and that my experience with Hydra would make it more difficult for me. I am pretty glad I can now prove them wrong and say that I beat Steve to it.” Bucky let out a small chuckle at his last remark. You smiled a bit before thinking about what to say again.

“I’m glad it was you first instead of anyone else.” Both of you sat there for a second, processing everything that was said.

After this pause, Bucky started conversation and asked some questions about your powers and your interests. He was really intrigued by the idea of auras. He asked about what auras the rest of the gang had and what they meant. You loved how interested he was and gladly explained to him what auras were and what everyone’s symbolized to you. You guys just sat there and talked for a good 30 or 40 minutes.

You let out a pretty decent sized yawn and then looked at your watch. 10:45PM. You needed to get some rest. After everything you did today, your mind and body were exhausted. But you knew you left a bit of a mess in the kitchen sink. So dishes, clean your face, brush your teeth, then bedtime.

“I think I’m gonna head to bed soon. I’m really tired.” You said as another yawn escaped your body.

“Yeah, it is getting pretty late isn’t it. Go head to bed, I’ll probably be up for a little bit, gotta do some work before bed.” Bucky grabbed your crutches and helped you stand up on them. Once you were stable, he placed his hands on your arms, leaned down to kiss your forehead and said “Thank you for dinner. It really was amazing.” Flashing that brilliant, toothy grin to you, he turned, grabbed the plates and cups, and headed to the kitchen. You followed.

You knew he was going to do the dishes, but you wanted to help. As soon as he saw you come into the kitchen, he got a sort of facial expression that said ‘Really?’

“What are you doing, doll? You need to get some rest.” He knew you had a good heart, but he wasn’t going to let you work anymore tonight. You needed sleep.

“Well, I didn’t want you to do all of the dishes. You do too much for me as is.” You started to make your way closer to the sink. Bucky stopped you about halfway.

“You cook, I clean. It's a rule. Now go, your room is that way.” Bucky pointed to the hallway and then turned towards the sink and started scrubbing one of the plates. You puff out a little sigh and keep moving towards the sink.

“It’s a stupid rule.” You hobbled over next to him at the sink and started to pick up one of the cups and wash it with the sponge. Bucky was wiping his hands on the dish towel before he turned to you. He had a small smile that was a bit mischievous.

“(Y/N), put down the cup and put your crutches to the side.” He didn’t sound worried or demanding or anything.

You were curious as to why he would ask such a strange thing, so you did what he asked. As soon as your crutches were leaning up against the counter and you turned around to face him, your feet were lifted off the ground and you were in Bucky’s arms.

“Bucky! What the fuck?! Put me down!”

“Since you were having a hard time finding your room and wouldn’t leave the kitchen, I figured I’d help you find your way.” He had that stupid smile on his face because your reaction was priceless. You thought it was funny, but you also were surprised and playfully angry.

He opened your door, placed you on your bed, found a pair of your leggings in your drawer and a tank top from your closet. He then quickly went back to the kitchen and grabbed your crutches.

“Now, you have pajamas and you’re in your room. I’m going to go do the dishes and you are going to sleep. I’ll see you in the morning. The team should be getting back tomorrow at some point. Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Ugh. Why are you so wonderful, Bucky Barnes? Goodnight.”

He shut the door behind him and you could hear the dishes clanking and the water running a few seconds later. You changed into your leggings and tank, brushed your teeth, and went under your covers.

You were falling hard for Bucky. He understood you, he cared about you, and he was such an incredible human being. There really wasn’t anything to dislike about him. But you figured he wasn’t the type of guy that wanted a relationship. So you just kept those thoughts to yourself as you drifted to sleep, hoping they would influence your brain to come up with some enjoyable dreams.

Apparently your mind had its own plans for what you would be seeing in your sleep that night.

Part 5 - Here

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