Annabeth Chase my darling perfect baby girl. God she’s so good I love her so much the development they’ve already given her is fire. Leah is killing it. “He isn’t that way. He’s better than that. Maybe I was that way once, but I don’t wanna be that way anymore” devours, eats, finally someone in her life that calls the gods out on their bs and shows her that there can be a better way. The trust the two of them already have is so admirable. They admire each other for different reasons and you can see Annabeth start to change her thinking because of Percy. Like yes she’s a badass but she’s also a 12 year old girl who has constantly wanted praise and love from her mother and from other adults and never gets it. Of course Percy challenging that, showing her that isn’t how it has to be, that she can and should be loved without condition? Someone who has so drastically changed her worldview so quickly she would abandon Ares’s shield to try to help him? She chooses trying to save Percy over love and respect from her mother which has been such a core motivation of hers. Because her mother left her to die, invited Echnida in, and Percy pushes her down the stairs to save her. Watching her realize the importance and value in that human connection and allowing herself to have that friendship instead of being stoic and stabdoffish? It’s so 12 year old girl are you kidding me? It’s that She-ra quote that’s like “you’re worth more than what you can give to other people.” Like she’s realizing she has value just because she exists. Not because she’s Athena’s favourite, or the smartest, or the toughest, but simply because she IS. That’s such a staggering moment and honestly it doesn’t even have to be a romantic thing like. When you’re like she is? The person that gives you that realization, whoever it may be, is an incredibly special individual. Her emotional journey feels so real, and even if it’s not exactly like the books it makes so much sense for her and it’s so REAL.

the school arc to me is so good because it drags ciel out of his position as a powerful figure and literally places him in the shoes of the person he could have been. the circus arc ALSO drags him out of his position as big bad queens watch dog/head of the phantomhive estate but the school arc feels like a mockery of a future that never was. this is what he could have been had his parents not died. and even then its NOT because he will never be that kid.

he never was.

Well written children's literature is so valuable to me and I love the themes in them all reflect the messages that adults so desperately want to pass on to their children.

You're not alone

You're powerful and you need to trust that power

A lot of scary things are going to happen to you whether you like it or not but there's a way out somewhere and you'll find it if you can stick it out and try anyway

It's important to seek out and find people you can rely on because you're a social species and need friends. And those friends will love you very much

We love you very much

I wasn't much of a reader as a kid or now compared to most people but I very firmly believe that it was the children's books I really liked as a kid that raised me right. In some ways I feel more like Trenton Lee Stewart's kid than my own parents. I just think there's a lot of solace in children's books from the underlining implication that the author has adopted you in some small way, that you aren't alone because you have their words you get their knowledge they're here to raise you even if they can't actually be in your life.

And I'm not even saying that every message in a kids book is good or that every author is a good person cause obviously that's not true but there's something so beautiful to me at the way it's an intristic part of humanity to foster community and kinship with people you'll never meet, to create fun ways to teach children how to human right.

I think that's why so many neurodivergent kids liked reading as a kid, each book was like a little parent saying I love you and a lot of us weren't getting that anywhere else

i love your sbg content!!!! if you’d like, could i request some ben and tyler hcs (separate) of the reader helping them calm down when they’re pissed at something? im a sucker when angry characters are soft for only certain people. bonus points for gentle hugs and kisses

Tyler & Ben (seperate) x gn!reader

summary: reader helps them calm down after they got pissed off because someone talked shit about reader behind readers back

warnings: swearing, bad grammar, violence, mentions of bl00d

A/N: hope this makes sense i wrote this at 1am so sorry if its shitty😭

Tyler Hernández

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School fights. Typical American high school movie type of shit, but today just had to be one of those days where it happened. You were walking to the front gate of the school when a crowd started to form and a series of ‘oohs’ and cheers were heard. It wouldn’t have interested you if you hadn’t caught your boyfriends name in that crowd. You run over and push through the people and see your boyfriend fighting your friend. You and some other person pull them away from each other, both of them beat up, well the other person a bit more. You pull Tyler by the arm and you hear curses aimed at you and Tyler; “Pussy!” “Booo!” You ignore them and hold Tylers hand, rubbing soothing circles on the back of it. You walk in silence, only Tylers huffing and heavy breathing being heard. He was looking anywhere but you, too angry to even speak.

You unlock your house and drag him to the bathroom upstairs. You sit him down on the edge of the bath tub and you crouch and open the cabinet, taking out the first aid kit. You glance over at him, his leg bouncing like it was running on electricity. “So, are you going to tell me what happened?” You ask softly as you start your clean the blood from his nose and lip, making him hiss in pain. He stays silent for a while as if he was thinking or trying to find the right words to explain the situation.

You wait patiently for him to sort it out in his head and play with his hair while sitting in his lap, softly kissing the spots that were bruised. He pulls you closer and hugs you, his face buried in your chest, mumbling swears and incoherent sentences. You rub his back and hum, knowing that mostly calms him down. He looks up at you, his gaze softening. “You ready to tell me what happened baby?” He nods and you smile, kissing his forehead. He looks away and speaks in a hushed tone; “They were.. spreading shitty things about you, so I defended you.” He says and frowns, looking guilty. “But they fucking deserved it fucking hijo de puta—” You kiss his lips to stop his rambling and his shoulders relax, kissing you back. You smile into the kiss as his hands wander down to your waist, squeezing it gently. You pull away, putting your forehead against his; “Ty, I’m glad you protected me but you don’t need to beat people up for it.” He huffs, quickly snapping back; “But—” You place your finger on his soft lips, shushing him; “No buts, you shouldn’t fight people, I don’t like seeing you hurt.” He cups your cheek and smirks up at you.

“I’d kill for you princesa.” He looks at you lovingly and pulls you into another passionate kiss.

Ben Clark

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You and the group were aware of Bens “anger issues” ever since the day you saw Logan getting bullies by Barron. You were well aware of how things like bullying triggered him so you tried to keep him away from things like that along with Aiden, who was always there to calm him down. Today Aiden wasn’t there, leaving you to deal with an angry Ben. Not that you minded but you never really calmed him down. You pull him away quickly from the fight, making him thrash around and he hits you right in the nose. You hiss in pain but drag him to the schools ‘abandoned’ bathroom. You take out some bandages and tampons, wrapping his bleeding knuckles with the bandages and clean off the blood from his lip with the tampon. He huffs, breathing heavily and his legs tremble. You finish cleaning him and gently pull him into a hug, playing with his hair. He breathes in your scent and seemingly relaxes wrapping his arms around your stomach, pulling you into his lap.

You sat there for a bit, humming the tune of his favorite song and pull away, kissing his cheek, forehead and finally his soft lips. You intended it to be a quick peck on the lips but he pulled you right back, kissing you with a bit more force. You pull away for breath and he hides his face in the crook of your neck. The bells rings but you guys stay seated on the floor of the bathroom. “Can you tell me what happened my love?” You say softly and kiss his cheek. He carefully take put his phone his head still rested against your chest, typing something on his phone.He hands you the phone after he finishes and you read it, making sure to not leave out even a single detail. “Your new friend the one you met in your volleyball class, she was saying some mean shit about you and I just snapped.”

You nod and lift his head up to look at you; “I’m really glad you stood up for me but you know you shouldn’t beat people up. I know it’s harder for you and I promise to help you through it okay?” You say with a smile and kiss his nose. You rub his back soothingly and he just fiddles with his fingers, obviously nervous. You grab his hands and kiss his knuckles, making him smile and you notice just the slightest hint of blush on his cheeks. You guys talk for the rest of the class you skipped in the bathroom and after the last bell rang you went home. You board the bus and sit down next to him and let him sleep for the rest of the bus ride. You both shared headphones and listened to your shared playlist that slowly lulled you to sleep.

idk why every fic author has to portray YY as abused employee that had been taken advantage of by HC like... you guys know that they are not your typical employee/employer, right? whatever you deem as "normal" shouldn't be applied to them in the first place.

Walla....kn1ves....genius big brain yandere writer....i just (re)found your Yves work (im sure you saw me freak out in the tags lmao) if you have the time/energy/inspo pls i beg you for a speck, a crumb, a droplette, ANYTHING of my baby Yves x fem!reader. I'm not sure how specific is too specific but I have a truckload of daydreams and prompts for this man dc im down BAD BAD for the way you write him. I'm not sure if this is too specific of a request but can it be yves holding himself back constantly because he wants to *romance* the reader but its so obvious he's itching for more until one day he finally snaps and takes her (specifically him giving her his virginity and whoops maybe going crazy when he finds out she isnt one)? I'm just obsessed with his characterization and want to see him in a ton of situations and feeling/reacting to different things. The stern dom undertones his whole vibe has disguised by a friendly foreign guide 🥵 The drabble of him was sooooo good and such a tease of his personality, it's so enticing hahaha. If that prompt is no good or doesn't inspire you then anything else is fine and ofc if you have no inspiration for Yves at all then that's a-okay too!!! Thank you sooooo much for thinking up that beautiful man and sharing him with us!!! Hope you enjoy your holidays💞💞💞

A/N: Ugh I'm so sorry I took so long in answering 😭😭 I was gonna write like a whole piece but my time has been cut dramatically, so please accept this poor little piece!! I was honestly so overjoyed at seeing your tags, it makes me so happy to see people's reactions to my stuff ┗( T﹏T )┛I wish I could have more time to write for this because I love the concept, I'm a huge fan of the "mysterious foreign guide who's just a little too friendly" kind of trope. Thank you so much for your support anon and I hope you enjoy this!! OG piece here for any of you nerds!

TW: Kidnapping, implied dubcon/noncon, manipulation

It wasn’t hard to notice Yve’s shift in behavior. Well, this shift out of many. When you first met him, he gave off a kind, well-meaning but nervous vibe. He did his best to show you around, to make you comfortable and converse with you in english to the best of his knowledge. That kind persona shifted into something more… desperate; obsessive, once he brought you back to his apartment. He was still kind, still well-meaning and observant to your needs. He apologized profusely when you got upset from how he kept you from leaving, promising that you weren’t missing anything important in class and that he could show you real culture instead! What could you learn from a textbook that would be better than seeing the country itself?

But time and time again, Yves made excuses to keep you inside, to make you stay by his side whether through photoshoots or studying, with him as your “teacher”. You had to learn the basics before taking such a “big” step out into his country, right? Unfortunately for you, Yve’s only taught information on the most trivial subjects. From words like “textbook” to “glass”, you were able to make meaningless sentences that wouldn’t serve you well in conversing with native speakers outside of Yve’s little apartment. Sure, it might help you occasionally, but it got you no where closer to understanding Yve’s rushed mumbling and incoherent rambling. 

With your sudden move to his apartment and his new change in conduct, Yves had slowly become less generous. He didn’t make as much of an effort to talk in english anymore, and made far less points to explain himself. You couldn’t tell what caused this new change-- a change that you were soon starting to accept as Yves showing his true colors. The man was still attentive to your needs, still caring and kind-- but the posessiveness that had slipped out almost entirely seemed to be taking hold. And while you’d think that a growing obsession would make it more beneficial to you-- it in fact, made your difficulty increase tenfold. Yves began to direct you on what you should wear, when you should eat, what you should do for the day.

 Not only that, but his attentiveness to…more intimate needs were far more prevalent as well. Whether it was bathing, or the need that pulsed between your legs, Yve’s was there to try and take care of it. You pushed him away multiple times, awkwardly trying to tell him that you were fine-- but it never seemed to stick. He always just looked at you with a tilted, confused expression, muttering in his native tongue as if he didn’t understand. So when the foreign guide began to sleep next to you instead of the cot on the floor, and began to press his morning erection agaist your backside sleepily, you knew your protests weren’t having any effect.

You would have walked right out of that teensy apartment the moment you felt he didn’t listen-- if you weren’t so afraid. If you weren’t afraid of the loaded handgun in his locked nightstand drawer, or how easily he could destroy your life at your new university-- which he mentioned offhand multiple times in a casual manner-- you would have walked out. The power he held against you, a foreign student with failing grades and no money, was too much for you to ignore. So, you decided to bide you time. It was only a matter of weeks until he got bored with you, you decided. But his new actions didn’t seem to prove that. 

In fact, the lustful, mischievous look he gave you that evening was the complete opposite. His scrawny frame jumped atop yours, hooking his hands behind your neck and leaning in to try and kiss you. He had planned an unusually fancy dinner, lighting candles you had never seen in his apartment before and bringing a bottle of wine with some italian takeout. You tried to question him about the mound of pillows and blankets on his balcony, the sudden romantic lighting, but the male only gave you a broad statement on how it was a “celebration” of sorts.

Yves’ sudden prowling mood after dinner wasn’t a complete shock-- considering you felt his eyes on you the entire evening-- but it still caught you a tad off guard. You tried to reject him, to push him away after each kiss, but it was done with such little effort and such great fear that you stayed silent once he muttered in an annoyed tone in his own language. Yves took your silence as a surrender, friskily lowering his hand under your shirt to caress your abdomen. He rambled against your flesh in half-english as he kissed you up and down, not afraid to let out vocal little noises of pleasure, or grunts of satisfaction ones he heard your breath hitch or a hum of desire come from your lips. 

But it wasn’t until he uttered a sentence with a familiar word, did you actually reply to him. You recognized the term from messing around with your friends, when you jokingly learned dirty words from your textbooks and the internet to use when you finally entered the country. You never expected to actually utilize them unless you went to a club or bar and happened to meet someone. One of those words, was ‘virgin.’ A more tame term compared to the bunch you had memorized, but one that you and your friends had idiotically decided to research. Though, it seemed your stupid endeavors had paid off. 

As Yves repeated himself, you began to understand the sentence a bit more. The man was seeming to imply… you were a virgin? Something about you both no longer virgin-ing? Maybe he was saying that he was going to ‘virgin’ you? You couldn’t figure out what he was trying to say, only mustering up the courage to poorly explain your sexual status to him, first in english and then in a broken version of his language. You tried to repeat yourself, thinking you might have said your statement wrong-- but Yve’s shocked expression and sudden lack of kisses seemed to prove you wrong. 

“You have…. Sex?” Yve put a hand to his mouth, eyes begging you to respond.

“Uh….yes?” You said with an awkward expression; you hoped he was asking what you thought.

Yve’s let out a choked gasp, looking as if you had crushed his heart in your palm. 

He looked down, voice cracking as he mumbled something incoherent, and likely not understandable to you in the first place. 

“I….I i’m sorry?” You tried to apologize, seeing how shaken Yves had become at finding out you weren’t as inexperienced as he. Despite his eagerness, you could tell he was new to trying to initiate something you had already grown long accustomed to, new to being so intimate. It was actually in part of his eagerness that you realized he wasn’t of the same sexual history. He was full of anticipation and desire, throwing caution and logic to the wind to fulfill what he had read in books and seen in films.

 Yves seemed to treasure the act of losing ones virginity far more than you had-- but you had only noticed it now. The candlelit dinner, the mood-fitting music-- your first experience was nowhere near as romantic. 

Yves seemed shaken, his low, almost sob-filled words growing heavier. He grew more aggressive, seeming to realize something now that he had processed this unexpected news. He had assumed you were just as much of an amateur as him-- that he’d be the one to “deflower” you in an act of passionate romance-- a bubble fantasy that had just been popped. But the male realized-- if he couldn’t have his desired outcome, he’d have to make due with what he had. Which was to make sure you’d fall to your knees, experiencing the best night of ‘passion’ that would make you never want to crawl to another man again. 

He was going to claim you-- to make it so those nights you spent with others never counted. 

You could only understand a fifth of what Yves breathily moaned into your mouth, once again jumping your bones though this time much more roughly. Before you could say anything further you had felt his quick hands unbutton your pants, his own thrown to the floor. He didn’t listen as you begged him to atleast let you move to the bed, where you would no longer be visible to prying eyes on the balcony. But he didn’t care-- Yves had already taken off his shirt, intent on ripping yours away too. He didn’t care anymore if this wasn’t going to be special for the reason he expected-- he was going to make sure you would be left with a night you wouldn’t forget.

Since my hand has been hurting too much to draw I give you my unhinged unfiltered not proofread thoughts… K so like I know what Ryan and Oliver keep saying… and I hear them… vulnerable this… new that… I love you to the core blah blah… but I need them to be so realistic about this. What do you mean we’re going to see them interact in new ways we haven’t seen before. Um yeah freakin right… the only difference is going to be that their going to acknowledge that their doing it in front of our salad. NEW? U mean they’re gonna flirt, cry, be touchy, be parental, be honest, be gay, be nervous, happy, not subtle, never not together, telling each other everything? Angsty when they’re sad? NEW? WHY DO U THINK WE SHIP THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE. Sorry it’s making me laugh but I just don’t believe them “new”. New my a*s. You’re just going admit that we’re not complete clowns. The only ONLY thing that would be new that I can think of is them actually talking about their relationships. Buck dating a guy and Eddie’s sexuality arc? But not their dynamic. That will not be new. Just louder?

Side note: Since the beginning of this show Ive been rooting for a bisexual Buck who just is. He knows who he is, Maddie does, and people are just oblivious. Basically that the extent of his “coming out” is him just talking about whatever and it’s a non thing… like “omg I dated this guy who was obsessed with alligators” and we move on. Its so powerful to have that kind of rep too. Even if they have a realization arc for him this season I would rather it be something more along the lines of him getting asked out by a guy or vice versa and him being like “at some point I felt like I had to fit the majority so I just stopped letting myself feel anything for men. Ive always liked them ive been with them…” so on and so forth. Or “yeah blank asked me out and we had fun” and blank is a guy and no one is like “U LIKE MEN?!” Or even if they are he’s just like “yeah haven’t you been knew?” Imo the realization arc there should be more Eddie realizing he’s jealous of Buck even when he’s with a guy”

On the other hand-Eddie’s sexuality arc is a really beautiful opportunity. Especially him talking with Athena and Bobby. Cause I feel like Eddie would have so much guilt or has so much guilt. Like he feels like he wasted so much of Shannon’s life when he was never able to love her in the way she loved him and then she died. And Bathena are obviously like “sometimes life works out that way but you got Christopher and a beautiful friendship and nothing would change that-do you really think she would hold that against you.” And Bobby is like “I got a second chance” Athena js like “I don’t regret that love it led me to such a beautiful thing.” Etc etc. and Eddie realizes Athena is Buck. Okay now im rambling and incoherent byee

actually the translation of dream into a quartermaster where he designs stuff for hob is SUCH a good thought and the parallels between nightmare making and weapons making??? i've had your quartermaster/spy au for an hour and it's already driven me insane anyway my mind threw me a picture of dream making deadlier and deadlier things to push his limits -- and push hob's -- only for hob to save dream from a glass cage using the simplest sledgehammer cause "it's not the weapon that matters," hob holds out a hand to pull dream up, his grin wide, "it's the person."

dream, of course, refuses to take his hand. but he thinks. he thinks he's starting to understand. hob doesn't even mean the person holding the weapon. he means the person the weapon's trying to save

sorry for my incoherent rambling, i needed to scream about your art and i hope you have a good day 💙

thank you and please dont apologise i absolutely love it when people tell me what they think of after seeing my art

I've been rereading this for the past 4 hours and i have no clue how to convey just how much i adore this 😭🤲 Dream pushing his own and Hob's limit and Hob taking every single challenge in stride and even excited by them bc he doesn't think he'll die/fail (he believes in his own skill and he trusts dream thoroughly)??? stunning

"It's not the weapon that matters, it's the person." Dream finally understanding that he's worth saving and Hob will always come for him no matter how impossible it may be. The simplicity of the sledgehammer?? The simplicity of Hob's love for him??? Just matter of the fact, straight to the point and unyeilding??? im gonna be thinking about this for the rest of the week and I'm definitely drawing this

i also may be really obsessed with what you once wanted so this is such an honour

hiii, first off im gonna say I love your fics, and I love your analysis of all the NXX boys, it rlly made me wanna learn more about the non-luke characters lol. (plus that one fic of yours that was omega luke going into heat permanently lives inside my head)

I just wanted to say abt the ask that wonders if Rosa knows Luke's illness is chronic - he tells her explicitly that the doctors have told him he has less than three years of life left in story 3 of under the milky way. it's right at the start of story 3, in the letter he sends rosa.

which also leads me to a question about the canonicity? canon-ness? canonnity? of the cards. I'm sorry if I'm just completely out of the loop, I dropped ToT for a bit before coming back and I have a terrible memory. but are all the events in these cards canon? because like the asker said, it rlly would change the dynamic if Rosa thought the illness was just chronic. (also I forgot if he mentioned the 3 year thing elsewhere). post-utmw Rosa knows he only has 3 years left but does regular rosa know?

I think I'm just incoherent and I'm sorry for the long ask haha it was rlly rambly but yeah that's basically what I wanted to ask.

hi anon!! first off oh gosh, thank you for your kind words!!

im so glad you like both my analyses and my fics (especially the omega luke fic gosh, it’s been so long since then, i almost forgot i wrote that HAHA)

now in regards to that ask youre mentioning, i fear there mightve been a misunderstanding! cuz in that ask, we were pertaining to the mc that exists within the Main Story Route. whereas the mc youre describing is the mc that exists within the Luke Personal Story route. forgive me if i misunderstood but to explain, eventually, main story and personal story (aka where all the respective cards, respective personal stories, and probably even the team events in a wibbly wobbly timey wimey way, exist in) diverges

to better visualize this, ive made a chart. but you caught me at a time i was doodling and had my drawing tablet plugged in so we’re all getting a taste of my bad handwriting

so if you look at this, you'll first notice how i forgot the number 6 in main story and then rushed to squeeze it in. but more importantly this is what i mean by diverging

based on what i remember, im pretty sure (....okay semi-pretty sure) that for all of the boys, main stories 1-5 has happened. this is because cards will mention dangerous/busy work (nxx work) and thus mc must be part of the team first for that work to happen. main stories 1-5 also must have happened because thats how she meets/works with (or re-meets, in luke's case) all of the boys one by one. after which, the personal story routes (along with all the cards) happens in a divergent timeline

there are some caveats tho. very very early cards of luke (and for this ask i will focus on luke's divergent personal story route timeline, just for simplicities sake.....should i abbreviate too? Luke's DPSRT = divergent personal story route timeline. Luke's MSRT = main story route timeline. perfect. that totally makes things less confusing!) mention mc not yet knowing where luke was during his 8 year disappearance, meaning that those cards MUST have happened BEFORE main story 5, when he tells the truth about where he went

barring little bits like those though, this divergence generally stands. the biggest proof of the divergence showed up in main story 9 because at that point, mc in Luke's DPRST already Knew about luke's illness. but mc in Luke's MSRT does not, and does not know as much as of the details as well.

another smaller proof that Luke's DPRST and Luke's MSRT are divergent is aaron. in Luke's DPRST, mc meets aaron for the very first time in bloom chapter personal story 4. but in Luke's MSRT, mc meets aaron for the first time in main story 9.

now on canonicity? my answer is yes

on like, everything.

barring the AU cards (like sott and gufeng cards, yknow), everything in all timelines is canon. just NOT at the same time. you can only choose one and---

oh my god wAIT THIS RESPONSE IS ONE I CAN USE TO ANSWER ANOTHER ASK IN MY INBOX, SIT TIGHT ANON 1

CUZ I GOT THIS ASK A FEW DAYS AGO FROM AN ANON I WILL CALL ANON 2:

and my answer to anon 2 over here is

i think the prologue is a dream sequence or some kind of metaphor or some kind of fever dream, yeah, but one that takes place in the Main Story Route Timeline specifically. and that something went wrong. terribly wrong, though idk what yet exactly.

the reason i think this happens in the MSRT in particular is cuz of 1) it's a prologue to main story in particular, i feel + 2) because of what we call "pulls" in this game: we use a Tear (of themis) to receive a pull of a card, which are called Visions.

all the cards of happier romances take place in divergent timelines, and these are visions because maybe it is MSRT mc who is having visions of these different possibilities that couldve happened, if only she werent in this timeline she chose, in the main story timeline where so many horrible things happen.

.....i feel as if ive said the word "timeline" way too many times to be making sense now, but theres my answers, anon 1 and anon 2!!

i hope something in here was useful and/or interesting ;w;

(Incoherent rambling, sorry)

so many people consider the ship of me n my husband to be problematic, because of an age difference despite us being the SAME AGE. I was actually a few months older than HIM (not that that matters) its just so . . . Ugh. And people try to justify it because he `acts old` and i `act young` my brother in christ we were both autistic that's it that's why. Like if you're really going to point fingers at what you perceive as toxic behaviour I lied to him abt who i was for 500 years! We were married for 400 of those! Idk. It upsets me seeing people suggest he mistreated me based on . Literally nothing. I miss my dragon bf very much i hope i can find him in this life

furina double spotted. hi anon. it happens that im also very mad abt this exact same issue (without the romantic implications) if anyone calls our dynamic "parental" again im BARKING . "childcoded" that is an adult woman. god forbid a woman be kinda silly and not infantilized...

I don’t ship most of these myself , but your rant/ramble posts on Les Mis ships are funny so I genuinely wanted your opinion on these 👁

1. Enjoltaire

2. Valvert

3. Enjonine

4. Marisette (or whatever Marius x Cosette was called)

5. Javonine (Javert and…Eponine 😭)

6. Marionine (A name a just guessed for Marius x Eponine because I wasn’t bothered to look it up)

7. and uhhh.. Granjonine (I think that was the name)

well hello darling! i live to entertain lol lets get into it i might have to put this under a cut because i think its obvious i have a rambling issue

Enjoltaire : a classic for good reason. they seemed really base level to me at first because i watched the movie first, but once i read the brick and really saw their dynamic i fell for them HARD. for me the beauty of this pairing is really rooted in the substance of their individual characters as opposed to like a romantic relationship. idk its so difficult for me to verbalize why i love them so much i think i just love the idea of finding common ground despite difficulties. enjolras and grantaire mirror each other in such a beautiful way that i feel the musical/movie couldn't really capture without demoting it to a puppy love grantaire/mean enjolras dynamic idk i have such an issue with some portrayals of them because i feel like they create a victim/abuser situation where there wasn't one but that's like a whole post within itself anyway i feel like im getting incoherent i love exr with every fiber of my fucking being just read the brick if you don't get it ok the movie and musical just dont do it justice and for the love of god avoid the fics written in 2012/2013 after the movie hype its all wRONGGGG (i love you george blagden but you created a twink grantaire movement) (they pull each others pigtails okay its a mutual obsession) (enjolras why don't you just ignore him baby? glutton for punishment my dear we all know if you hated him you wouldn't let him hang around) (anyway) i should make a seperate post about my exr feelings bc i could talk ab them for hours

2. Valvert: okay this is where i feel like i can be unpopular with the fandom. i fucking hate this ship. like physically, spiritually, all that. its one of those that i kinda lose respect for the person bc its literally a cop/prisoner thing. its not enemies to lovers. its not a hate love thing. javert's a fucking cop. valjean is his victim. the whole idea of people romanticizing this makes me feel so insanely icky and i think the point of the story has just gone RIGHT over some folks' heads please take a step back and think about it. neolib behavior sorry not sorry

3. Enjonine: enjolras is gay. just like, straight up in the brick enjolras is a gay man. this ship is spawned from straight girls who saw aaron tveit and use eponine as their not like other girls posterchild. just a whole bunch of hetero nonsense. same behavior as the joseph quinn enj x reader bs. honey thats a homosexual man and can we please stop reducing eponine to needing a boyfriend she needs a stable home and a goddamn therapist fucking hell

4. Marisette: okay. i LOVE THEM. i'm a cosette stan myself, and i'm a huge fan of a gooey love at first sight situation. they contrast my love for exr in the sense that they're a very easy love. their parts in the book literally make me SWOOOOOON i can put aside my beef with marius as a combeferre kin to appreciate how sweet they are

5. Javonine??: im sorry wh aht. did the snape x hermione shippers leak into the lm fandom or am i being fucking punked im not discussing this its obvious why this is wrong please tell me its obvious y'all are NASTY

6. Marionine: eh. eh. i mean, like i said with enjonine eponine's problems are not gonna be solved with a dude. i'm really not opposed to them, persay, its just that eponine's love for marius is so incredibly dependent and rooted more in her personal trauma than actual love, so i feel a little weird with them sometimes. sometimes it just gives anti cosette vibes (cough cough bc of the bullshit love triangle angle that the musical markets cough cough) so i tread very carefully with them

7. Granjonine: again what in the damn hell. i'm not dignifying this shit they could be besties but for the love of god george blagden did a number on the straight girls. STOP PROJECTING ONTO EPONINE IM GONNA LOSE MY FUCKING MIND LEAVE HER ALONE

thanks for the ask lovely, i do love rambling even though these ships are baffling lmaoooo

god, you're my favorite writer ♡♡ stay that way 😢❤❤

Can i pwease request something? First, i want a hug :D and second..I wish to request a fluffy headcanons for a poly!lost boys for when the reader is on her period and she just becomes very sensitive, she can't handle being yelled at or anything aggressive/rough and she just..bawls, cries her eyes out and she is constantly wanting attention (u can also include michael if u want bc he pretty boy and im a simp 🙄)

You can also do them separately if you wish, I don't mind. I'll be a very happy person regardless :0 bc ur perfect owo ♡♡

I’ll give you ask many hugs you want, thank you so much😭😭 and if this isn’t me literally everyday not just on my period 😫🤚 michael is such a pretty boy you’re 100% right to simp

and so sorry this took so long, i just got a new job and i’m sooo tired! but i’m fine now

Ploy!Lost Boys with a sensitive s/o

• let’s say it was the first time with them dealing with your period, they were concerned when they smelt blood all over you, queue all four of them (mikey doesn’t have the strong sense of smell yet so he doesn’t know what’s going on) checking for any wounds, cuts, scraps, bruising, anything, Paul even tries to look under your clothes before Dwayne stopped him, but that was just mostly for personal reasons.

• Once you explained they all collectively said “oh.” Paul had to be clued in a bit more but thats okay, at least your pretty Paulie<3

• you were walking with Marko and David to go get some food, since David had the money and Marko just wanted to be with you cause you smelled so much like blood good. You were falling a bit behind because of your cramps, that’s when someone bumped into you, knocking their drink into themselves.

• The person of course, blamed it all on you and started yelling at you to which your eyes teared up at. David and Marko noticed. They both stepped in front of you, Marko was ready to swing and he almost did as he and David told the person off, male or female, his hands are rated e for everyone

• but, when they heard you sniffle, they turn around and see tears brimming in your eyes, almost falling out. You didn’t want to cry in front of the small crowd you’ve attracted, so you tugged on David’s sleeve, not trusting yourself to not break down in sobs when you try and speak

• Marko and David quickly knew what to do and they took you quickly back to the rest of the boys who crowded around you as you struggled to hold back tears.

• When Paul (ever so blissfully ignorant) asked you what was wrong and you just broke down, rambling in basically incoherent sentences about how you were just walking and this person bumped into you and they spilt their drink and you didn’t even do anything and they started yelling at you, and you didn’t even get your funnel cake! You cried extra hard at the last part

• Once you calmed down some, because it was embarrassing to cry in public, you drove with Dwayne back to the cave along with the rest of the boys, save Marko, he stayed back to buy your funnel cake but he raced to catch up with all of you.

• once you got back to the cave, you apologized profusely for crying, so much to the point where David was annoyed. And with a short, sort of angry, ‘it’s fine’, you quieted down and he thought he did something, until he looked back at you and saw your lower lip wobbling and new tears filling your eyes,

• “what is it now?”

• “you yelled at me.” you cried.

• queue Michael holding you, then paul pushing michael off of you and holding you and Dwayne scolding David.

• “why did you yell at her?”

• “i didn’t!”

• it all basically ends in a cuddle pile every night until your period is over, extra cuddles if you cry, or get upset, or sad, or if you even blink wrong then at least two of them will be on you.

• and if you want then one of them (or more if you’re comfy with that yet) will have smexy fun time with you to cheer you up! Or to distract you for the time being because they will eventually have you talk about it and they’ll help you as much as they can.

i remembered to put tags the first time around!!!!😁😊 clap for me

I don't know enough about music to ask interesting interview questions, but would you want to like explain your artistic process for how you have made your albums? Like how long did they take to make, what's your starting point? this is a totally optional ask I just thought it would be interesting to hear about something you're interested in

ty for the ask! i feel like the answers to these questions are sorta hard for me to answer tbh because i really did just stumble into this, at least thats how it seems to me.

for baatmoia, id say it took me roughly 9 months to make from beginning to end, but i dont know when i really consciously started working on it. the concept of "making an album" was something i was essentially challenging myself to do, seeing as ive been making music for a long time and only sparsely released a smidgen of it under a different project. they were also the first songs of mine i ever wrote and recorded lyrics/vocals for, which was another challenge for me. as for the construction of it (continuous mix) thats just something i like doing with mixes - my favorite albums have A Flow to them, and i liked making it so that you couldnt have clean delineations between when songs began and ended. thats also part of my mindset behind obscuring my vocals so much, which in turn is just an expression of wanting to make an album that felt dreamy, hazy, ethereal, formless. thats also what i did for baatlnoyl, but for a different reason. i operated a lot on "vibes" for both albums since i didnt really have any other metric (and i still dont), which tbh i like because i think it helps add a very personal feeling to everything.

baatlnoyl is inspired by a dream i had, also took about 9 months(ish), and was directionless for a long time until i was a monthish away from my self imposed deadline. in this dream, i fell in love with a character of that dream and i woke up before i could really tell them. and after trying to use that dream for inspiration for one song in particular, i realized the idea fit with a sort of "call and response" i had noticed with everything else i had written (a lot of repeating motifs). so like, after 8 months of working on this, the album turned into a sort of nonlinear story about that kind of experience and what it would feel like for both people after the dream ended. i wanted this one to be noisier and harsher, but also more expansive in genre (the shoegaze/etc focus on baatmoia was also a self imposed challenge). technically speaking, a couple songs on here have been on my backburner for years, but they finally found a home here (most of it is still brand new material though). i still feel like this one isnt fully complete - i skidded into that deadline and i think it shows. im planning on fixing it up soon to hopefully actually make it the way id like to keep it.

im so sorry if these answers are like disjointed and rambling, its hard for me to explain because so much of the entire nature of these albums was "intuitive," doing something because i Simply Wanted To, because It Felt Right. if i tried to explain every component, i think itd very quickly turn into incoherent babbling. but thank you for the interest in how i make these!!

i spent a long time writing this so i'm not going to proofread. sorry if its rambling, incoherent, or repetitive.

part of the struggle for me when it comes to IRL bimbos, and I've mentioned this before, is that they're whole human beings and usually if you're opting into bimboism and identifying yourself as a bimbo it means you're putting on an act, especially if you're a sex worker and bimbo is your brand. you're not someone who would naturally be called a "bimbo". maybe in the sense you have a ton of plastic surgery, blonde-ish hair, and huge fake tits, but you're not dumb, flighty, or frivolous.

i think when it comes to IRL bimbo stuff, and this is by no means judgement, it has a bit more to do with objectification and by extension, submission. and that's why you get... rude people. entitled people. men, i mean. the impetus being these terrible replies i saw on @stephaniemichelleirl's twitter.

i'm trying not to make sweeping assumptions here but i get the sense things like this happen a lot. and to be completely honest even just the hyperfocus on big tits as objects of lust confound me. the focus on pieces instead of the whole.

i'm not going to sit here and pretend i haven't objectified women, that i don't objectify women, but it kinda has diminishing returns, doesn't it? at least for me it does. in most instances its hard for me to think of a woman as just an image. i'm not sure how many others feel this way. cause i think a lot of people can find an image or video of someone they think is physically attractive and just get off to them without even knowing they're name or anything, at least as far as pornography is concerned.

but objectification and dehumanization isnt necessarily my point. my point is that i genuinely love the bimbo persona, even beyond sexual context. a few months ago i had referred to the bimbo persona and my need to perceive women as dumb as an act of dehumanization, and perhaps it is dehumanizing to be "dumb", but i think more than that its just that i love women who are vapid, self-serving, attention-seeking, silly/not concerned with intelligence, or at least appear that way. and if anything, im interested in their humanity. and its their humanity that turns me on. i admire the confidence, salaciousness, kindness, exaggeration, bitchiness, and idiosyncrasies of disparate bimbo women. "bimbo" itself is dehumanizing and it shouldn't be.

this is also where the tiktokers fall flat. their goal is to reclaim "bimbo" as a mode of expression, which to them just means: wearing pink, acting girly, and dressing sexy and acting dumb but in an ironic #girlboss way. they have no interest in actually redeeming wronged women like Anna Nicole Smith or Jessica Hahn before her, no interest in defending their behavior or honoring their humanity. they just want to wear pink and regurgitate white liberal talking points. none of the people who see bimbos or bimbofication as a meme actually respect or care about actual bimbos. in a way they're guilty of dehumanization themselves. using self ID'd bimbos, bimbo art, or just women with a lot of plastic surgery as momentary means of entertainment.

Eliksni sentence #2 of Null Composure

wow! such progress! much conlang! anyway here's sentence two

English: It pulsed softly, checked and rechecked the permissions that summoned it, and then pushed a data spike solidly into the Vex domain.

Eliksni: Iidathem ir’lohtra aadekspriist, meyvikem taap seyr’meyvikem dreskibrik en kanen dulrakem, taap meydrem israankaviiyor ir’adryst ma’bev Veksehniin.

bonus: here's a behind-the-scenes into my VERY messy process with this sort of "middle step" where i put the sentence into Eliksni word order and mark up all the words so i know what will be a root word/affix/whatever.

Pulse-past simple gentle-adverb access point, check-past simple and two-check-past simple permission-plural RP 3sg summon-past simple, and push-past simple data-spear secure-adj inside Vex-realm.

notes below the cut so yall dont have to deal w a giant block of text (sorry! i'm not a very concise writer...)

stuff im proud of/want to highlight:

the construction for "data spike" literally meaning "machine-thought-spear"

the word for data isn't a direct compound of "machine" and "thought" bc that would be wayyy too long. i used a similar process as i do names where i mashed together individual syllables. i'm gonna try doing this more often, because i think over time really long compound nouns would just get squished down into a new noun

to say that an action is done again (in the way that the re- prefix does in English), you just prefix on "seyr" meaning two. (okay technically it's the counting word for two, not the plain numeral, but like shhhh i haven't even finished the numbers yet so never mind all that). if you wanted, you could just as easily use a higher number to really emphasize that you've done this action several times, tho anything higher than three comes across as very hyperbolic and usually is done in a joking tone.

the word for Vex is just Veks. no need to reinvent the wheel!

stuff that gave me a headache:

if you compare the sentences word-for-word you may notice i repeated the subject of the sentence "aadekspriist" at the beginning while the English sentences employs the pronoun "it". this is because in Eliksni, the subject of a sentence should not be a pronoun if there is ambiguity about what it is refering to. looking back at sentence 1, the last noun mentioned was "stone", not the access point. therefore, the subject of this sentence needed to be specified so a reader won't get confused about what "it" refers to.

the third person singular pronoun "kan" (here referring to the access point) is in the accusative form "kanen" in the relative clause to make it clear that is it the object of the verb "summoned". because the verb in relative clauses always goes to the end, word order couldn't be relied on to show what the pronoun was referring to

geez that was a lot, huh? if you made it this far, thanks for reading! i'd love to hear you folks' thoughts, ramblings, incoherent screaming into the void, whatever you got. all the tags on the last translation post i did really made me smile :D

new lexicon post will come soon-ish bc i have like twice as many words now! might just post a link to the spreadsheet if i can figure out how.....

Date: 7-31-23

For the blorbo bingo - any Cu of your choosing? c:

Hello fellow fate fan and Cu enjoyer, thanks for the wonderful ask!! I think I will pick Lancer this time (I'm playing it safe lmao i hope i will be able to be concise and not start screaming incoherently). But also thank you for sharing your Cu theories and analysis with me. I like talking about this guy a lot, but he is absolutely my BLIND SPOT when it comes to understanding!

I apologise in advance if any of my Cu takes are a bit off (a lot of projection can be blamed for this). Also the rambling is extremely long so you can ignore it too. Thanks again!

Note: These are all my personal opinions, not truth (cuz im far from an expert on him)

Cu (Lancer) HAHAHAHA YESSS

This time I am going to be a lot more selfish (extremely selfish) and discuss my personal feelings on the character (which I tend to avoid doing)- based on all the bits I circled. Firstly yeah there is a deep seated reason why I love this character.

It's because well, Cu Chulainn does represent certain qualities that I am obsessed with and yearn deeply for. The way he guards, protects, supports, and takes care of his inner circle is pretty moving. He really cranes out his neck for those that matter to him, and as the white day quiz says; it's like he's kind of a warm blanket as an ally. Just the way he interacts with others in Fuyuki emphasises this, he can be so easy to talk to; he'll offer some great services, and though he can be annoying sometimes, he can be great company too.

Yes I get the people who say Cu is a terrifying warrior- which is especially showcased in how he plays around with weaker opponents/ kills em quickly and talks to them in a friendly yet horrifyingly cold manner concurrently- and he could kill me in my sleep (or anywhere for that matter) BUT he can be so warm as well- or cold- idk he's SEASONAL!!!!!

Yeah, his loyalty is DEFINITELY context dependent (he is a pretty loyal warrior and serves a lord and a friend very well but has had struggles when it comes to loyalty as a lover.... but I tend not to ever talk about that, in fear of pissing off the fans that believe he's a very reliable lover. I'm sorry Cu fans, but I don't quite agree, like YES he can be a good lover but also YES he can fuck up greatly too); but when he cares, he cares deeply and he does his all to be helpful to others- even to the point of self-sacrifice at times-and I really respect that a lot.

Feels like he is a great guy to have as an ally/ friend, which is why I ended up being unable to stop him from becoming MY FAVOURITE GUY OF ALL TIME (sorry gilgamesh).

But there is also a deep seated reason why I hate him so much. I think most of it is just jealousy from the fact that he embraces his role as an outsider, as the one who doesn't quite fit in anywhere; yet is also so popular despite that. I am jealous of his customer service skills, and how he knows so expertly well to craft himself in a way that showcases his best sides to others, and how he isn't afraid to show off his powers. And I am jealous that there are some who see how fucked up he can get, but they still adore him regardless; and he adores them equally too. I AM SO JEALOUS OF CU CHULAINN (especially Lancer) LMAO ITS SO FUNNY I SWEAR TO GOD! Also wtf how dare he rock his blue ponytail and garish clothing and still look sexy I hate it (joking id bang him if he even so much as offered).

And then the next point is I do not like to discuss Cu Chulainn on tumblr (but I LOVE hearing other people's opinions of him). I have witnessed just how mean Cu discourse can get for over 6 years now and it doesn't seem to be improving. However, I have also spoken to many kind and cool Cu fans as well, so the online Cu experience can vary. This is a very unpopular opinion but I LOVE the cute Cu fanarts just as much as the scary ones (cuz its hot i think the duality is SEXY AS FUCK).

But to me the main bit that exhausts me is that it's like I wish there could be a marriage between the different perspectives of this guy, cuz in my opinion I don't really think anyone has gotten him wrong, and it's more like they get him right but maybe certain aspects of him may be more to their particular focus, which is totally fine. I like hearing contrasting takes of Lancer Cu and hope that will continue forevermore.

Like Lancer Cu is full of duality and conflicting and contrasting elements, I believe he just is, y'know. Lancer Cu. But somehow there are loads of tumblr battles about which aspects are more valuable/ less worthy to look at, which REALLY CONFUSES ME!!! And people even sometimes deny Copious Cu Crimes (Cu/CCC) or want to squash out Cute Cu Content (Cu/CCC) which worries me.

(But I am the person who misunderstood his core character for over 6 years, so I admit I used to do this mistake myself. I used to focus so much on his warrior and cold side that I forgot about his affectionate and loving side!)

Why can't warrior cu, adorable cu, scary cu, criminal cu, fucked up cu, mean cu, nice cu, helper cu, loving cu, grumpy ass cu, ruthless cu, perceptive cu, monster cu and funny cu all coexist- please im begging you. And yeah, I also avoid talking about the more negative shenanigans that occurred in certain versions of his myth cuz some of his fans get really angry about it or turn it around to make it seem like I'm the one with a problem for raising it (this actually happened once lmao).

Sorry, I know he did his best to protect his masters in fate and his province as a myth-hero, but the man still also a war criminal in my eyes; through and through. LMAO that is an unpopular take, though. But tbh, I mean if I was a citizen in a holy grail war and Lancer had a master that was like 'hey lancer, drink em for mana' I feel like even if he disapproved, he'd still do it anyway.... That's just how I view him. He can be so wonderful and lovely, but duty comes before all else. That's the vibe he gives me personally. That's why I see his loyalty as context dependent based on individuals involved and the situation itself.

Next yeah, I have unwillingly come around to him because I really did not want to like him at first (I found him intimidating and thought he was wearing a clownsuit at first) but so much for that! Thanks a lot Cu!!! Seriously. One second I was shocked when I witnessed him coldly and ruthlessly kill Shirou on orders and hated on his outfit; next second I was pissing myself with laughter at his banter with Tohsaka Rin- and drooling over that EXACT SAME OUTFIT. How the hell does Lancer Cu even DO THAT? He was just so easy for me to like that I didn't even realise he was my blorbo until I was in deep and I haven't come out since (help me).

Oh gosh it's tough answering every circle. I want to give up! But if he can crack my spine like a crawfish and slurp me up I would likely be grateful. Is this an innuendo or literal though, because if it is literal I will be screaming in pain. But hey, if he's worth it he can slurp my insides anytime (nah i'd cry).

Yeah, my worst mistake and the reason why I struggle so much to characterise Lancer Cu decently is because I have projected so heavily and so MESSILY onto him that I accidentally gave him some of my real life headcanons. And it is so creepy because hopefully me and this guy aren't similar. I mean, I don't think I'm like Lancer Cu at all (most people say I'm like Archer, who I don't really see myself as either). But sorry Lancer Cu, I definitely threw some of my trauma of feeling like an outsider onto you. MY BAD!

Could I make him worse? HAHAHA, YES. Because I can challenge him in terms of ideals (I doubt he'd take me seriously though), and could very easily piss him off. I think my personality is definitely an antithesis to his, maybe I'm even his opposite. Because he's like 'ENJOY THE MOMENT, KEEP BALLING EVEN IF YOUR LIFE IS SHIT, OVERCOME AND ADAPT TO SUFFERING' and he does that very well, even when things knock him to the floor he keeps going (but then in turn runs away from certain issues and struggles to share his traumas).

But I could probably piss him off by saying 'IM BALLING AND OVERCOMING THINGS LIKE YOU BUT THE SUFFERING ISNT FUCKING ENDING AND THE PAIN IS GETTING WORSE THIS IS BULLSHIT' is that a clown 2 clown communication???? I have no idea. I bet he'd hate me for saying that though but that's okay, maybe he'd simply brush me off- but if he was a debate guy I would debate him!

Yeah the pretty privilage, he is a really beautiful man. That's all. He is so beautiful- stunning, even. TT-TT Super pretty. Doesn't help that his personality is interesting as well. Maybe I am just obsessed with him?? And yeah, he is kinda the white noise in my brain, he infiltrates my own actions and life choices by a great deal, I often think sometimes 'HEY WHAT WOULD LANCER CU DO? HOW WOULD HE REACT?' to even the simplest things and start laughing, or someone can remind me of him and I start laughing, or I think 'oh damn wish i could talk to him' I am like the PARASOCIAL FAN! HELP!!!! Also I think about him at random times. Lately, I have become more normal(?) about him but all it takes is 1 thing and he's back in my brain full time again.

Yeah, he is very complex and well written in my personal opinion. I think Nasu and the crew have done really well. I love how great a job they've done of making him seem like an annoying bawdy loud man as well as an incredibly intelligent, perceptive and agile warrior at the same time (and then he can even be bashful too). He a great character, he has so much nuances like a real human being so he gets a 10/10 from me. One personal example I have is that I used to think Cu was ALWAYS the happy loud funny annoying flirt guy off the job, until I started seeing scenes in anime like Emiya Gohan which showcases how no actually he also can be quiet sometimes and enjoy a bit of time alone, or needs time to disengage and cool off by himself.

I mean I don't usually even notice these aspects of characters. But with Lancer Cu, I constantly have to re-learn how to appreciate him because of how varied his character is.

Yeah I got the brainrot, but it's the brainrot of constantly having to readjust the way in which I view him. And the extreme brainrot I get whenever I start going bazongas about his hotness. I keep my Lancer Cu horny thoughts to myself for that reason lmao, I mean I have a crapload of suppressed horny thoughts so i think its horny brainrot in regards to him :)

Idk... I am biting my fist? The more appearances, the better. I am glad he is popular = more canon and fanon content.

As for putting him in situations, I would say stop but .... it's kind of entertaining. But I'd like to see him win a grail war someday. ALSO THOUGH THE WHOLE BAZETT STORY IS SO SAD BRUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i pray for an alternate saga where Cu and Bazett remain master/servant for the whole war cuz I'd cry if that happened and enshrine it my heart 4eva. I forgot my point for this part now....

For the next one, I used to need Lancer Cu in this way. It was an extremely unhealthy and scary time in my life to be frank. It took me through a journey where I had to confront some very personal issues and traumas. SO THANK YOU LANCER CU FOR FORCING ME TO FACE MY TRAUMAS!!!! Cuz yeah when I say I used to rely heavily on this blorbo to live.... my god. Yeah. It was not a good time. Hahahaha... yeah it was the worst time ever. It took me a long time to even admit he was my blorbo, cuz of all the issues it unleashed in my own personal life.

I AM NOT NORMAL ABOUT HIM AT ALL! I PROJECTED MY MENTAL ILLNESSES ONTO LANCER AND THEN HAD TO CONFRONT AND BETTER MYSELF TO OVERCOME THEM AND ENJOY HIM THE WAY I DO TODAY! THATS WHY I SAY IT SUCKS THAT ITS SO HARD TO FEEL SAFE AND COMFY WHEN SHARING CU POSTS ON THE INTERNETS! I WISH THAT THERE CAN BE LANCER CU STUFF FOREVER AND ALSO MY VIEWPOINTS ON HIM ARE EXTREMELY BIASED AND SUBJECTIVE BECAUSE HE IS MY FAVORITE GUY OF ALL TIME SO I ACCIDENTALLY PROJECTED ONTO HIM AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

also he is so fucking hot too WHYYYYYYYYY THIS IS JUST I- WHAT WHY UGH AND IM SO JEALOUS OF HIM AND HIS GENDER AND ITS SO UNFAIR THAT I LIKE HIM SO MUCH!!!! I AM SO GRATEFUL AND SO ANGRY!