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wilfully-obtuse-android · 8 months

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I had a friend with whom I had like the craziest 3 am convos, now we're drifting apart so I'm gonna like document some of that weirdness, some jokes

1. Universe was created last Thursday

2. Peppa pig is 2m tall

3. I classify my memories by places, not time. Time isn't linear it's geographical

4. Ego finished before it could fester, the universe doesn't allow me

5. From the depths of Mushroom kingdom, emerges a man with a moustache so long

He's got a plan, he's got a scheme

Warrior, wario the money making Machine!

6. Will he cry, a broken man for all he has lost? Will they live or will they roam about with their hearts dead and brains shrieking?

7. Never be vanilla. Always be so extra and dramatic that you put Ursula to shame

8. We could just be immortal sentient jellybishes, floating in the ocean all day, but nooo

9. Rodrick from the live action movie is way too fine

10. A: I don't have friends

B: wait what about m- (starts fading away)

11. Confused OONGA BOONGA intensifies

12. I want to pour mouthwash on my eyes

13. A: Haha you're so old.

B: old, ancient, a dinosaur, even.

14. I pity myself, an eternal doormat who keeps trying to help people despite being ignored by them.

I'm a beta male, sonic

15. A: hey come onliiine

B:Who dares summon me, The Great Naga, king of the serpentssssssss

16. I broke into a children's park to play on the swings, I'm a criminal

17. Without even a semblance of awareness of any conciousness

18. Never feel guilty for eating chocolate

Feel guilty for being alive instead!

19. Thanks bro, you keep me undergrounded

20. After everything that has happened, if I don't get in my favourite college, I'm gonna be so pissed off that even the Gods will worry. The simulated Matrix should be sweating rn. They better not distract me.

21. I forget I'm alive sometimes

22. How can I sleep when the world is briefly magical for a moment which seperates the days? ✨

23. Haha suffer peasant

24. A: i grow, not grow up

Cosine so fine Constantine

Always alone, post Malone, Sylvester Stallone

All these rich people always act they busy

All I ever want in my life is pu-

I'm sorry, I got carried away, i don't where that came from

But like there's so much symbolism in this ryt, socioeconomic disparity, immaturity and-

B: Yea the pussy is a metaphor for how you were in a dark cave in your life

25. Mongolian throat singing ensues

26. Let's lie back and stare at the stars as last of the lights are put out

27. Mike wazhousekey

28. Ye have been blessed, kill some people in your dreams

29. I wanna die while somersaulting into the mouths of sharks in a lava pit volcano

30. A: my neck hurts so bad

B: want me to break it

31. Why am I like this?

When did I become like this?

32. You can feel the 12 year old girl energy from the screen

All my friends have personality of a toddler

33. Being buff and anxious is wayy better than being anxious

34. You're one sarcastic and a pleasant funny chap good sir

A hoit a toit

35. The theological conclusion to an eternal saga

36. And her skin the colour of coffee but only with milk because she was white (talking about how there were little coloured people in standards of beauty thing)

37. Atleast you try, my beloved

38. A: do my laundry

B: here have monekys

A: ...

B: special helicopter swings for shirts too

39. That attention seeking, two timing bubonic barnacle rat

40. There is no gender

There is only cockroach and those too filled with fear to face it

Anyways they have their own whole life and they seem happier without me so Saying goodbye i suppose haha sed lyf

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ladyofthenoodle · 2 years

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okay so it’s time to explains my tags on @gentil-minou ‘s post because y’all asked for it (sorry for starting a new post but this is like. very tangential now)

okay so this is actually a theme in a lot of my fics because i actually feel like it’s that important to the show and to their characters and why i’m really interested to see “risk.” marinette and adrien are, in different ways, both risk averse. this shouldn’t be a big shock to anyone who regularly reads analysis of this show. adrien’s is a learned behavior mostly: as chat noir he takes risks more freely, but as adrien, he’s learned that the nail that sticks out gets hammered down. to quote stephen schwartz as performed by idina menzel, “don't dream too far/ don't lose sight of who you are.”

we see adrien ask his father for things on occasion, but typically they’re either low risk, low reward (“will you have dinner with me father” would get adrien a small bit of happiness if fulfilled and is unlikely to be punished for asking) or they’re something adrien finds so important that he’s willing to risk it, and even then he does his best to minimize the risk (i.e., preparing a speech to ask to go to marinette’s birthday). but in general, adrien doesn’t ask for much and tries to be happy with what he gets, because maybe if he demands more he’ll end up losing what he does already have. this translates over to his relationship with ladybug and hesitancy to ask her directly to fulfill his emotional needs.

for marinette, i think this comes more naturally. she’s an anxious person. she’s terrified of rejection. being with adrien could make her so, so incandescently happy — but she’s not willing to risk what she already has with him. better to enjoy the scraps of friendship than to ask for more and risk ruining everything. sacrifice the possibility of romantic happiness because the process of going after it could leave your friendship in tatters. now, she’s made some progress here this season and is getting more self aware about it (especially in glaciator 2 and simpleman), but as much as she’s starting to accept that she can’t control the outcome, she still isn’t ready to actually face that in action.

as ladybug, it’s even more pronounced, since the risk isn’t just personal — she’s risking the safety of the world. so even if making changes to how things are done might be better for her, she doesn’t know if it’s safe. fu’s rules are safe so she’ll keep following them even if it’s making her and chat noir miserable. she bent them a bit to tell alya because she was at her absolute limit, because she couldn’t sustain it anymore. but after that she goes back to wait she was doing before. even though telling someone her identity made things easier, she’s not willing to take more risks like that, not unless it’s necessary, not even if she’d be happier (and we know from ephemeral that she would). and that still hasn’t changed by the end of kuro neko and i don’t know if everything can be resolved until it does.

but it DID change during ephemeral. her choosing to reveal herself was so huge and she was so nervous and tense but she’d finally realized that she wanted this, wanted chat noir, badly enough to take that risk, that this happiness was worth it. part of that i’m sure is the happiness finally felt within reach for her, but she’s still scared in that moment. and ephemeral ultimately does confirm that this is a huge risk. she’s not imagining things. telling chat noir her secrets very much can directly lead to shadowmoth winning. i don’t think it’s inevitable, but we see that her fear is well founded and the risk is real.

(sidebar but now that i’m thinking about “i’m not that girl” it’s officially going on the playlist for ephemeral: hands touch, eyes meet / sudden silence, sudden heat / hearts leap in a giddy whirl is like. that ladybug reveal moment. and then every so often we long to steal / to the land of what-might-have-been / but that doesn't soften the ache we feel / when reality sets back in UGH why don’t i know how to make amvs or gif sets. if you do please @ me i have ideas)

so “risk.” it’s scary for both of them. and it’s an episode title. in the finale. and we know that there’s some possibility of ladybug risking her identity, perhaps for adrien (not to him, i don’t think, but for his sake) — the very thing she’s most scared of risking, because like in the season premiere, she’s facing a point where not taking a risk is worse (especially if my prediction is right and adrien will be in more danger than just potentially leaving town). she couldn’t bear to lose alya’s friendship and she can’t bear losing adrien either. as for confessing her feelings, she might not be ready to take the risk of confessing if that means losing what she has with him, but if that might be lost anyway? well that changes things, doesn’t it?

and then on chat noir’s side, we see him in the ladynoir clip taking the risk of asking for more from ladybug, something he’s been avoiding all season. kuro neko has set him on this path already, though he might still need another push to really start bringing things up (perhaps ladybug thinking “adrien” is in danger and starting to make less rational decisions — certainly a good reason for chat noir to want to bring up a reveal). so i think he’s definitely taking that risk. but the summary of the episode asks us if he’ll take the even bigger risk of standing up to his father, and like with marinette, i think adrien might be finally moving into a position where the risk it worth it. because it’s no longer about reaching out blindly towards some intangible potential happiness with the possibility that you’ll lose balance and fall into a lava pit that you could’ve otherwise avoided. now they’re both being slowly lowered into the lava pit and they have to reach up if they want to survive. staying in place is no longer an option.

#sorry about the lava pit metaphor #i play ‘the floor is lava’ a significant amount #like almost daily #anyways i hope that is what y’all wanted #i probably have more thoughts on this but not tonight #miraculous ladybug #ml spoilers #kuro neko #ml speculation #using my noodle

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losingmymindtonight · 5 years

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WARNINGS: Peter jokes about dying a lot in this. It’s just Gen Z humor, but if that’s likely to trigger you, please be careful!

On days like this, the cabin was a haven, a lighthouse, a McDonald’s sign shining through midnight darkness.

(Okay, maybe his last metaphor wasn’t as romantic as the others, but it was still true. Midnight hash browns were the best hash browns. Fight him.)

Peter thought he was a pretty chill person. Hell, he was known for a being a chill person. Go to Peter, people said. He’s just so chill, people said. You could punch him in the face and he’ll apologize, people said.

(Okay, maybe nobody actually said that about him, because nobody besides, like, a handful of people actually cared about his existence, but if they did, that’s probably be what they’d say.)

But, sometimes, he just got frustrated. Like, kinda-wanted-to-find-some-abandoned-hunting-lodge-in-the-middle-of-a-forest-somewhere-and-tear-it-to-pieces-with-his-bare-hands frustrated.

(Okay, maybe not a whole hunting lodge. Maybe, like, a cabin. Or a half-molded shed. The point was: he wanted to annihilate something. The more satisfying the thing was to destroy, the better.)

He’d admitted it rather shamefully to Tony in the lab, once, and the man had laughed so hard that Peter had genuinely thought he was going to hyperventilate.

“Jesus, Pete, you are not actually feeling bad for occasionally, just occasionally, being frustrated, are you? Because if you are, I’m selling you for a less faulty kid.”

As it turned out, Tony was probably gonna have to sell him, because the guilt never, ever abated. See, Peter wasn’t supposed to get frustrated. That wasn’t his purpose. He was a fixer. Fixers were patient, wise, and they certainly didn’t get frustrated. They didn’t get angry. Those emotions were not things that fixers felt.

Maybe he was faulty. Maybe Tony should sell him.

He was always a mess when he was pissed, and he always blamed it on inexperience with functioning when he was focusing so much energy on not punching the nearest object. He tripped getting out of his car, locked his backpack inside and ended up fumbling angrily with the trunk before finally, finally getting it open. When he got to the door, he missed the lock the first time and then it took him four tries to get the damn thing open.

(He nearly cried at that point. Which, was, you know, not his proudest moment.)

Tony was reading on the couch when he came stomping in, although the book was quickly discarded. Peter just threw himself face-first onto the unoccupied loveseat, groaning for a solid fifteen seconds before Tony’s amused voice interrupted him.

“You alright there, kiddo?”

“I’m gonna kill someone,” he said, monotone despite the lava in him, “and then I’m gonna kill myself, and then I’m gonna... well, I don’t actually know who’s gonna die after that bit, but the killing’s not ending there, I can tell you that.”

Tony whistled. “Wow, Pete. Resorting to a murder-suicide before dinner? That’s drastic, even for me. Must’ve been one hell of a day.”

He couldn’t stop the snort that jumped up his throat. God, he hated being so cynical. It really didn’t come all that naturally to him. It felt like wearing a suit that didn’t quite fit.

“You have literally no idea.”

“Wanna tell me about it?”

Poor Tony. He was the one who always had to listen to him complain. He barely did it with his friends, certainly never did it with May. Like he’d said before, that wasn’t his purpose, wasn’t his role in those dynamics.

But here? In the cabin, carefully cocooned in the safe-space of Tony’s world? Yeah, he could be a little whiny.

Still, though: poor Tony.

“I hate people,” he rambled. “I hate the world. I hate myself. I even hate the sky. Can I hate the sky? Is that, like, a thing I can do? You know what, don’t answer that, cause I do, so it’s a thing I’ve done either way.”

“Mm,” Tony replied, and Peter could hear the leather on the couch creak as he shifted his weight. “I have a proposition.”

“Does the proposition include me dying?”

“Uh, absolutely not. Haven’t we been over this? No dying, not allowed. You dying is off limits.”

“Tragic.”

“Shut up. Besides, my proposition is much better than dying.”

Peter turned his head, and used the one eye not smothered by the loveseat’s cushion to squint over at Tony. “What’s your proposition?”

“Scream.”

“Uh, excuse me?”

“Just scream. Loud as you can. We’re the only ones in the house, by the way, so you won’t worry anyone. Pep’s with Morgan at her dance class.”

“You want me to scream?”

“It’s therapeutic.”

“It’s weird.”

“No, it’s therapeutic,” Tony shot back, rolling his eyes. “C’mon, kid. I dare you.”

“No, no, don’t make this a dare-”

Tony was grinning, obviously beyond proud of himself. “I bet you won’t do it.”

“Mister Stark-”

“Who knew that Spider-Man was scared of a little screaming, huh?”

“I’m not scared-”

“You seem a little scared.”

“I’m not-”

“You sure? Cause I’m starting to wonder if I need to-”

Peter buried his face into the cushion, and screamed.

He paused. Gasped in a breath that smelled like hot sweat and damp leather. Screamed again.

There were a few seconds of silence after he’d finished. Then,

“You done?”

He rolled onto his back, giving Tony his full attention. The man had his legs propped up on the coffee table, arms folded behind his head: the picture of relaxation. Definitely not how you’d expect someone to look if they’d just had a sixteen-year-old kid screaming their head off in their living room.

“Yeah,” he said. “I’m done.”

“Feel better?”

“A little,” he admitted, and it was true. The frustration was still there, lingering like a pit in his chest, but he knew it’d probably stick around until the next day, anyway, so any relief was, well, a relief.

Mostly, he was just feeling guilty for feeling those things in the first place.

“You’re allowed to be pissed off sometimes, y’know,” Tony said, studying his face. One day, Peter was determined to uncover how it was that his mentor always seemed to know exactly what he was thinking before he’d even finished thinking it. “It’s called being human. Even freakishly precious kids like yourself aren’t immune to that particular tragedy.”

“I don’t like it, though.”

Tony laughed. “I know. Seriously though, Pete, you’re a good kid. Give yourself some leeway. Not everyone can be cheerful all the time.”

Peter sighed, shoving a cushion off the loveseat just because he could. “But if I’m not cheerful, who’s gonna be?”

“Uh, I don’t know, maybe jolly old Saint Nicholas?” Tony rolled his eyes. “Anyway, who gives a shit? Everybody’s supposed to get their day in the sun, but that means that you’re allowed a day in the darkness, too.” He shuddered. “God, look what you’ve done to me. I just got poetic.”

Despite the resentment still brewing him his gut, he couldn’t resist Tony’s prodding. “It was good, Mister Stark. Like, really good. Like, Shakespeare who? Sorry, I don’t know him.”

“You’re obnoxious.”

“Hey, I’ve had a bad day.”

“Are you gonna sing a sad song just to turn it around?”

“Daniel Powter.”

Tony stared at him like he’d just spoken a foreign language. “Excuse you?”

“Daniel Powter,” Peter repeated. “He’s the guy who did that song, Bad Day.”

“Well, thank god I know that now,” Tony said, reaching out for the remote and turning on the TV. “Now, I say we drown our sorrows in awful television and pizza for dinner. Thoughts? Comments? Objections?”

The cabin: haven, lighthouse, midnight McDonald’s. All things that called out to people in the dark. “Sounds good to me.”

It looked like they were going to move on, that the previous moment had passed, but then Tony stalled, face growing serious again. “Actually, one last thing before I let you change the subject for good.” Tony pointed at him with the remote. “Remember this: you’re allowed to clean up your own messes before you clean up everybody else’s, and you’re not responsible for other people.”

“I feel responsible for other people,” Peter muttered.

“Yeah, well, you’re delusional.” Tony turned back to the screen. “Now: Family Feud or Kitchen Nightmares?”

“Star Wars!” Peter exclaimed, just to lighten the mood, and to see Tony’s face.

Sure enough, the fond-annoyance blossomed within a second.

“No-”

#the author is projecting #me? using Peter to self soothe? it's more likely than you may think #i don't even know what this is i wrote it in like #half an hour #if you wanna send someone to kill and/or give me therapy #i'm totally cool with that #anyway #tony stark #peter parker #tony & peter #irondad #losingmymindtonight writes

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jeontaeh · 3 years

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THIRTY³⁰

✫ ✬ ✭ ✬ ✫

Space. Stars, swirls of white light in the far distance emerging closer with every blink of the eye. Swishes of moonlight dancing onto the brittle plane before them, it was all space.

The universe, galaxies, vast, neverending space. Space that would never be filled. Too far away to reach its hand to, too vague to figure out. That's what space was.

Taehyung reminded Jungkook of space.

With his silver hair and silver eyes. He was the moon, the moon which shines its light. But he was also the moon which hides the light, which casts darkness onto others. He was the dark side of the moon and the light side of the moon.

Jungkook was living in the eclipse.

In an in between, the sun on one side, burning hot, ready to kill. The moon on the other side, inviting, encouraging, sweet, but causing darkness. Where should he go?"

"You look like you're doing some deep ass thinking."

"Yeah, about your mom," Jungkook mumbled, and Yoongi walked up to him, placing a hand on his shoulder, and then sitting down beside him.

There was a small silence. "Are you mad at me? For bringing you here?"

Yoongi snickered, looking away. He smiled a little, which confused Jungkook. "Are you kidding? I couldn't be happier,"

"W-what?"

"If it weren't for you, I would've never met Hoseok. Not to sound too gay, but he might be the best thing that's ever happened to me. Hobi- he- he's like the sun. Everything was dark until he came in. Metaphorically, and literally-"

"Ew," Jungkook said, and then giggled a little, looking at Yoongi. "So you're not mad?"

"I am. A little." Yoongi said, looking at Jungkook. "You should stop victimizing yourself so much."

Jungkook stilled. "I'm sorry. I just- I-I get so mad at everyone. I tend to forget sometimes things are my fault too."

"It's okay. You're learning. You'll grow. We all do." Yoongi said, and then looked at Jungkook. "Anyways, suit up. You need to go out there, and take us back home," Yoongi smiled, and Jungkook nodded eagerly, and then Yoongi got up and walked out of his room, closing the door behind him.

Yoongi walked outside Jungkook's room and saw Jimin doing a somersault, and walked past it, not wanting to ask questions.

Jimin somersaulted and then stood up straight, walking to Taehyung's door dizzily and walking in. "All the blood is in my head, so I can give you the best advice. My MIND! Ugh."

"I don't need advice," Taehyung said, and Jimin saw him sitting on his bed. "I don't care anymore," Taehyung grumbled lowly, looking straight ahead, looking scary with his eyebrows all furrowed.

"Ohhh. You're going through your anger phase." Jimin said, and Taehyung looked at him with confusion.

Jimin decided to explain. "This breakup has caused you to go through the 5 normal stages everyone goes through in a breakup. Stage #1, crying. Stage #2, being whiny and missing your ex. Stage #3, anger. Stage #4, sleeping with someone else. Stage #5, murder. And then-"

"Woah- wait. Stage #4, sleeping with someone else? Who the hell am I going to sleep with??" Taehyung asked, and Jimin rose his eyebrow.

"Woah, you completely looked over stage 5. Anyways- I don't know. Find someone to sleep with. Won't be me!" Jimin said, and Taehyung rolled his eyes.

"Don't worry, Jimin. I don't think anyone wants the two of us to be together." Taehyung said, and Jimin hummed.

Taehyung stood up and walked towards Jimin, grabbing the door and walking out of it. Jimin followed, and the two saw Jungkook by the entrance of his door, dressed in tight red pants, red shirt, and red boots.

Taehyung let out a fond smile upon seeing him, because goddamit he looked adorable. Jungkook saw them and huffed when he aw Taehyung.

"Oh. It's you." Jungkook mumbled, looking away with his nose in the air.

"Don't fancy seeing you either, Jeon." Taehyung snapped back, looking the other way as well.

"Jeez, get a room," Jimin said, which made Jungkook and Taehyung frown. "Jungkook! Are you ready for your big mission!"

"I-I'm scared. I hope I do well. It shouldn't be too hard." Jungkook squeaked softly and dammitdammitdammit, Taehyung wanted to give him a little kiss on his cheek and a tight hug and assure him.

Taehyung walked past him, not batting an eye, which Jungkook noticed. Taehyung walked into the control room and saw the other four boys there.

"Logistically speaking, would eating onion rings for 6 weeks straight kill me? Yes. But I didn't know any better. I was only a child. Merely 19." Jin spoke, while the others listened intently.

Taehyung sat down beside Hoseok. Jimin and Jungkook then walked in. "Is everything ready?" Jungkook asked, clearly nervous.

"Yes. The transporter is on standby, with me right by it. The mechanic balls for the energy transporter are with you. And the... combustanator is installed into the engine room." Hoseok mumbled, and Yoongi frowned.

"Did you just made up a word for a machine?"

"Yes."

"I love you." Yoongi whispered, and Hoseok winked at him.

"Great! Awesome! This is- n-not scary at all! I'm fine!" Jungkook laughed nervously, and Namjoon walked up to him.

"Kookie, listen to me. You'll be fine. Nothing can go wrong, we've run past every safety measure. We wouldn't seen you if we thought something could go wrong. Don't worry, okay?" Namjoon said softly, and Jungkook nodded.

Namjoon wrapped him in a tight hug, and then Jimin rushed over and hugged him too. Jin rushed and joined the hug, and so did Yoongi, and so did Hoseok, until they were all in a bone-crushing hug, squeezing Jungkook in the middle, who started grumbling cutely.

Taehyung didn't join. He just looked out the window.

"Good luck!" Jimin said.

"You'll do amazing, Kookie," Jin said, and Hoseok nodded. "You will."

"Don't be scared for a second," Yoongi whispered.

Jungkook thanked all of them, and then looked at Taehyung, who continued looking outside. Jimin walked up to Taehyung and subtly smacked him on the head.

Taehyung flinched and then turned to look at Jungkook, who was looking at him with big eyes.

Taehyung was about to say something. And dammit, he should've. He should've said something.

But he didn't.

And Jungkook accepted that and turned around, putting on a little red helmet and walked towards the exit of the spaceship.

"Go off little red riding hood! Go fight the.. um... three pigs and- and get us the magic beans!"

"Jimin you're getting everything mixed up."

"Does it look like I care."

Jungkook nodded to them, and then opened the door of the spaceship, and fell.

The ship was hovering above land, and Jungkook fell onto the ground, falling right onto the red sand. He groaned uncomfortably, and then looked up, and saw the spaceship flying into space, disappearing like a twinkling light- and Jungkook was alone.

"Hey Kooks, we're here with you," Jimin said through his earpiece, and Jungkook nodded. "Say something if you can hear us."

"Something," Jungkook said confidently, and Jimin chuckled from the other side.

The planet was boiling, the ground seething already. "Okay, Kookie. Here's the deal. You've got 30 minutes to do everything before the planet explodes."

"30 minutes??? Why didn't you tell me that before!!!"

"We didn't realize haha. Anyways, get going." Jimin commanded, and Jungkook sighed and started walking quickly, holding the remote tightly in his hand.

You can do this, Jungkook reminded himself, seeing a big pit of lava. Jungkook grabbed the other machine out of his pocket, which was like little mechanical balls, and threw them onto the lava pool.

Suddenly, the lava started flying up, as if rushing towards the spaceship. Jungkook jumped back, getting startled.

"Good job Kookie! We got the deposits onto the ship! Now do it for the planet. Throw those balls everywhere." Jimin said, and Jungkook grinned.

Jungkook took the balls and began chucking them everywhere. He threw it far away, he placed them under stones, he kicked one, he flicked one, he twirled one around.

"15 minutes left, Kookie. It's time to transport you onto the ship." Jimin said.

"No, I can get more of these mechanical balls," Jungkook reassured, and Jimin hesitated through the earpiece, but Jungkook rushed ahead and began chucking the balls everywhere.

Jungkook did it for a while, making sure the spaceship could get as much energy as necessary. More, if required.

"Okay, there's 8 minutes left. Hoseok's transporting you. Just reach the transport bay, please. It's quite far from you." Jimin said quickly, and Jungkook nodded.

"I'm on my way," Jungkook said, turning around and walking ahead.

Suddenly, the land in front of him broke in half, and Jungkook got startled and grabbed the rock beside him, which was burning up. Jungkook flinched, and then saw the land towards the transporter get crushed into lava.

"Dammit!" Jungkook cried, and heard Jimin curse from the earpiece.

Jimin, who was up on the spaceship, watching all this through a screen, felt sweat trickle down his temple. "Fuck- okay, um, Jungkook, go to your left," Jimin commanded, and Namjoon and Jin walked behind him to see what was going on, Yoongi right beside him. Hoseok was near the transport machine, and Taehyung was sitting in the back.

Jungkook moved to his left, and jumped over the pool of lava, stepping onto the ground, which crumbled away and broke. Jungkook lost his footing and fell as well, and cried out in surprise, but grabbed his hand onto a rock steadily.

"Jungkook!" Jimin cried out in worry, and Jungkook gulped, hanging from the rock which he was holding onto with one hand.

Jungkook looked below him and saw pools of lava far below. Pools and pools of lava. Waterfalls of lava. God dammit, he felt fear seize his heart.

"F-fuck-" Jungkook let out, and then reached his other hand up. His hands, silvery and weak, had no power in them. Almost none.

"Lift yourself up, Jungkook. You can do it- j-just climb onto the steady ground," Jimin stammered, and Jungkook gritted his teeth and groaned as he pulled himself up, pulling his upper half onto the ground.

"Yes! Good!" Jimin said, and Jungkook thankfully climbed onto the ground. The moment he did, he got up and began running.

Everything around him began crumbling into lava. Smokes began puffing from the ground, and Jungkook's heart raced faster and faster and faster- his feet going faster and faster-

Jungkook saw the transporter not too far, and all he had to do was reach it, touch it, and he'd get transported back. All the lava was flying up onto the ship now, and Jungkook was in harm of getting burnt.

"Look, you're almost there, Kookie. Just reach- you're almost there- you're there-" Jimin said through his ear, the boys looked nervously at the screen where Jungkook was.

Taehyung walked up towards the screen, feeling a gut-wrenching fear fill him up.

Almost there, so close, almost there- right there- so- so close-

Jungkook stopped. Stopped dead in his steps.

Jimin frowned, Jin's eyes widened, Namjoon looked closer, Yoongi paused, and Taehyung just gulped nervously. "Jungkook, dammit, move!" Yoongi shouted.

"Guys- the transporter is in danger of getting into lava! Tell him to get onto that thing now!" Hoseok shouted, and the boys looked weary.

"Why's he not moving?! For fuck's sake, Jungkook, move! You have 2 minutes!" Jimin cried, and then Taehyung saw it.

How he was frozen there. His eyes wide, dark. Too dark. How his hands lay by his side, not moving an inch.

He knew what it was.

And he knew what to do.

"Why is he just standing there? I-I don't understand," Jin stammered, and Jimin gulped.

"Jungkook, can you hear me? I-I think the connection is lost," Jimin said, and then Yoongi looked up.

"Where's Taehyung?" Yoongi asked, and Hoseok rushed into the room.

"Fuck's sake," Hoseok growled, and they looked at him in confusion. "Taehyung just transported himself onto the fucking planet-"

"What?!" Namjoon shouted, and Hoseok nodded, and all the boys saw a bruise on Hoseok's face.

"I tried stopping him, but he punched me and transported himself onto the planet. It's suicide, it's literally fucking suicide," Hoseok snapped, and all of them looked at the screen in front of them.

Because if the planet exploded, the five of them would die too.

Taehyung felt himself getting transported onto the planet, and the moment he did, he felt the heat. Lynching heat, electrocuting every sense in his body until all he felt was fire.

But that wasn't important.

Jungkook was in front of him, so close to the transporter, yet stood completely still. So close to submerging into the lava. So fucking close-

Taehyung saw it. Saw how the ground beneath Jungkook's feet began crumbling, so he rushed forward. Rushing forward and grabbed Jungkook, picking him up with ease and falling onto the floor himself, burning the side of his legs and torso.

"No," Taehyung let out, picking Jungkook up, who seemed to be in a trance. A haze. Taehyung knew what it was in an instant. He'd studied enough to know what it was. "No, no baby- g-get up,"

Jungkook blinked a few times, and Taehyung got up unsteadily, pools of lava rushing up like beacons beside them. Jungkook looked so weak like all the energy has just been taken out of his body in a snap.

"T-Taehyung-" Jungkook let out, and that's when Taehyung looked at him properly and realized; his body was a dark grey. At first, Taehyung thought it was the ash, but it wasn't. It was him. He was causing this. Jungkook's body was weakening. His body was turning ash-grey, wilting away, but Taehyung wouldn't allow it."

Jungkook felt tears reach his brown eyes. "I s-saw something T-Tae- something- something d-dark-"

"I know. I-I know." Taehyung whispered, and then looked up. The transporter was on one small piece of land. The only one rooted up in the midst of a sea of lava. "We need to get out of here, Kookie. N-now, we need to get out of here now."

Jungkook looked so weak, practically trembling. "I-I can't move-" Jungkook squeaked out. "I'm s-s-sorry, Taehyungie-"

"Don't say that." Taehyung let out.

"Y-you came down here t-to.. to p-protect me-" Jungkook continued, and Taehyung saw tears reach his eyes. "B-but I'm gonna die a-anyway, a-aren't I?"

Taehyung kept quiet, and Jungkook felt tears rush down his cheeks now. "I-I d-don't wanna die, T-Tae," Jungkook let out, voice so weak, so frail, one move would break it completely.

"You won't," Taehyung said suddenly, his own eyes gleaming. "Y-you're not gonna die, baby. I-I won't let you." Taehyung whispered, letting out a small smile.

Jungkook looked up, and for a second, he saw him. Him, Taehyung as the light side of the moon. As the side of the moon which brightens, which wakes, which loves.

And for a second, Taehyung was everything. He was space, the universe, the galaxy. And for a second, Taehyung was surrounded by illuminating light. And for a second, Jungkook felt his heart being burst open, Taehyung's fusing with his, and that's when he realized;

Taehyung was his soulmate.

"I-I won't die?" Jungkook said, hope gleaming in his eyes.

"No. No, you won't." Taehyung said confidently, and then grabbed Jungkook close to him and ran as fast as he could, jumping the highest he could, landing as steadily as he could, and then throwing Jungkook onto the transporter.

Jungkook landed on the machine and instantly felt rays passing through his body. He was getting transported.

But Taehyung? He was still on the ground, and the planet had run out of time.

"T-Taehyung!" Jungkook cried out, and Taehyung looked at him with hopeful silver eyes, eyes that Jungkook felt boring into his soul.

"I love you," Taehyung said, and Jungkook saw his body practically burnt from the side, fire igniting from him.

"N-no- no no-" Jungkook let out, tears in his eyes, reaching his hand out to grab Taehyung-

But he was transported onto the ship. And Taehyung wasn't.

Jungkook landed in the middle of the control room, and the moment he did, he felt a warm tear trickle down his cheek. "Taehyung-" He whispered out, feeling cold. Too cold.

He saw the boys there, standing in confusion, shock, horror. "Taehyung!" Jungkook let out again, and then got up onto his feet painfully and rushed to the window, eyes wide.

His hands reached the thin glass, and then he saw it. They were in space. And the planet had exploded.

✫ ✬ ✭ ✬ ✫

https://jeontaeh.tumblr.com/post/647229576025702400/thirty-one%C2%B3%C2%B9

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littledreamer9211 · 6 years

Text

Monsters

A/N: Not going to lie, I don’t know what this is. I’m just in one of those moods today. I’ve left it open so you can imagine any guy you like. It is quite heavy so if you feel like you can’t read it then i totally understand. On the other hand if you do read it and want to talk to me about anything then please message me, I’m here for you. You can also message me just to let me know what you think.

Warnings: Mental Health issues - could be triggering. and maybe a couple swear words Word count: 195 ____________________________________

It’s amazing just how quickly a mood can change, with very little prompting. One minute your walking through your life with a metaphorical blue sky, able to face any challenges thrown your way then before you know it the pavement is ripped apart and the smooth path you were once able to see is now disrupted with lava pools and monsters lurking in the corners and bushes. You can’t see them but the utter dread in the pit of your stomach lets you know that they are most definitely there. Waiting patiently for you. No matter how long it takes you to get to their part of the path, they know that the wait is worth it. And that’s one of the scariest parts of the dark path. The knowledge that it doesn’t matter if you make it to the monster this time around because they will happily lay dormant until the next disruption to your blue sky. The fear is enough to make you feel physically sick.

Laying in bed ignoring the shrill screams of your alarm, you could just tell it was going to be one of those days. The only reason you turn to shut the damn thing off was the sudden movement of the warm body beside you. A gruff “morning baby” as he hauled himself from the depths of the warm duvet. The rush of cold air only making you hold on tighter and snuggle deeper into the warm, squishiness of the mattress while trying to cocoon yourself in the blanket once more.

The sound of the shower door squeaking open and the rush of water lets you know that there’s no way to avoid the dawning of this new day or the tasks that the day was impatiently waiting for you to check off of your list. Knowing that once he got a proper look at your face he would know that today is a dark day, you dragged yourself from the bed and over to the wardrobe – shoving on which ever clean clothes came to hand first and not giving a damn what you looked like. Sneaking into the bathroom while he was still singing away in the shower, you quickly brushed your teeth and washed your face while thanking the heavens above that you showered last night so your hair was manageable. Normally the squeak of his voice as he hit the high notes in Sia’s newest song would bring the brightest of smiles to your face but not today. A quick “bye” and you were out the door where you could disappear into the horde of morning commuters and stay lost, just another face in the crowd. It’s always easier around strangers. You don’t have to pretend or explain. You can just be.

You avoid your favourite coffee shop because the friendly smiles might just tip you over the edge. You’re not even sure you want coffee, it’s just a morning habit. No appetite is a normal occurrence on these days.

Finally making it into the office, you place your bag and phone on the desk. Not paying any attention to the 3 missed calls and 4 un-answered texts all from the same number.

A quick glance at the diary for today and you let out a heavy sigh of relief that there were no meetings scheduled. Closing your office door, thankful you were the boss, you sent a quick email to your PA and friend Wanda full of bullshit about how you were snowed under with paperwork and only wanted to be disturbed if it was absolutely necessary. Of course, you knew she would smell bullshit straight away – she’s your PA and knows your schedule and deadlines better than her own. But she was also the kind of friend that would see you needed your space and would respect that. It was one of the many things you loved about her. Nat on the other hand, is the complete opposite but you didn’t have the energy to deal with that right now so decided to ignore the red head for as long as you could get away with.

A couple of hours go by quietly before deciding you should at least let him know you’re ‘okay’. Unlocking your phone, you read the texts which get more urgent with each new one. “Damn it babe, I’ll phone Wanda and Nat. Don’t think that I won’t.” Just as you finish reading this last one, another text comes through. “Just let me know you’re okay. That’s all I ask.”. The rush of guilt that washes over you makes your eyes swim with unshed tears. You don’t deserve this man in your life. His unconditional love and understanding leaves you utterly speechless. The sparkle from the diamond on your left hand catches your eye and reminds you that he said he was all in, for better or worse but it’s hard to believe that when your inching closer and closer to a hidden monster. “I can’t today. Too dark.” Was all you text back.

By now it’s early afternoon and your inability to focus on anything or get any work done would normally have you infuriating by now but you’re numb.

The constant buzzing of voices and office talk creeping through the crack under your office door is starting to really grind your gears. Who cares about the hot repairman that’s finally came to fix the fax machine that you emailed about 2 weeks ago? Or how the new Stark project was “so cool!”. You were surrounded by a group of well paid, nerds. On any other day, you would be out there geeking over whatever they were discussing too but today that just cost too much energy and you had none to spare.

You’re about to email Wanda and tell her to make everyone shut the fuck up when suddenly you hear a soft, deep mumble of a voice just on the other side of the door. It’s a voice that you would be able to recognise anywhere. He’s here. He seems to be having a conversation with Wanda and you hear her muffle of a reply before there’s a soft knock at the door. From the second the knock rings around the silent room, it’s like time freezes and you can’t breathe.

Like slow motion, the door opens and the light from the hallway seems to frame his silhouette in a golden glow. Your own personal guardian angel. Fuck…you loved this man. You watch, unable to move or say a word as he softly closes the door behind him and takes in the scene in front of him. You didn’t realise how much you had trashed your own desk until you see his eyes flash surprise, which in turn fades into concern and a hint of something else…was that heartbreak?

But you don’t care…can’t care. About the state of your normally overly organised desk, the fact that you’ve made no effort to open a blind or even turn on a light, or the fact that you’ve unconsciously ran your hands through your hair so much that it looks like you’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards. He doesn’t say a word as he walks towards you slowly, never breaking eye contact. As he gets to the side of your desk, he cautiously pulls back you chair and turns it so that he can kneel in front of you. Saying nothing as his hand moves towards your face pushing the hair out of the way and cradling your cheek in his palm. You don’t realise that you are crying until his thumb gently strokes the tears away.

His warm skin against yours feels so right and you didn’t know how much you needed it until just now as he hesitantly brings his other hand to cradle your other cheek while bringing your head forward to lean against his own. Both of you close your eyes as he lets out a gentle breath at the contact. Your hands finding their way automatically to his wrists, gently tracing themselves up to link your fingers with his, finally able to let out a shuddery breath of your own. “Hey there boss lady, whatd’ya say we get out of here?” His voice hesitant to break the silence, the whisper fading out into the dim room. One small nod of agreement from you and he places a soft kiss to your forehead. Nothing more is said as he reluctantly lets you go and grabs your phone and your bag in one hand and waits patiently for you to stand. As soon as you’re as steady as can be on your feet, he pulls you close to his body with his free arm and cradles your shaking form to his side, letting you lean all your weight on him. A soft squeeze to your shoulder and he’s leading you out of the room.

You don’t make eye contact with anyone as you leave the building but you feel as he nods towards people in acknowledgment also knowing that the look on his face will stop anyone in their tracks should they try and talk to you. Even Nat and Wanda.

You can see his car abandoned at the side of the road and another wave of guilt rushes over you as you can tell that he was more worried about getting to you than a parking fine or even wiping out other cars in his panic. He seems to sense your new wave of emotional distress as his hand rubs soothingly up and down your arm. Your head turns to bury you face into his chest but he hears you just fine as you mutter a small “I’m sorry.” He just tuts and kisses the top of your head as he whispers back, “Silly woman…got nothing to be sorry about”.

Unlocking the car, he quickly throws your bag into the back seat before opening the front passenger door and helping you climb up into the black SUV. Once he’s sure that you are safely strapped in and going nowhere he runs around the front of the car and jumps in the driver’s seat.

You both sit in comfortable silence as he speeds through the streets and its not long before the tall, suffocating city buildings start to disappear from view and finally it seems a little easier to breathe. The open fields and clear sky making you feel a little less claustrophobic.

As your tense shoulders seem to relax a small part of your brain kicks in and you realise just what this wonderful man has done for you. Without being asked, without being told how to, he has saved your life. Not just this one act of kindness but by loving and understanding you, by always being there for you and by being your best friend.

Turning your head to look over at him, you find that he’s already watching you. It’s not much, but you give him a small smile and slowly reach over to take his free hand in both of yours. Bringing it up to your lips as you gently kiss each knuckle individually before linking your fingers between his and bringing his hand down to rest in your lap. He shoots you one of his dazzling smiles and squeezes your hand in reassurance at the same time.

You were in no way ‘fixed’ nor were you ever likely to be but at least you knew you had found someone in your life who could help you slay the monsters one at a time, carry you over the lava pools and be your light at the end of the pathway. That’s all anyone could ever ask for.

______________________________________

Let me know what you think.

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periphrasis · 7 years

Audio

i could smell the rain in the air and feel the sweat beading on my forehead when we talked that day. and, instantly, i regretted the drop in temperature (which was probably my self confidence dropping to some decimal value in between zero and one) as i decided to talk to you for real this time, to spill half truths and spluttered confessions instead of competing with you for top latin marks or telling you about my subway ride to school

so, preface-free, i walked up to you (wishing that my shoes were clacking against the floor instead of my teeth clacking against each other), and i told you that i’m lonely, that i feel lost in my world and couldn't even imagine how overwhelming peering into yours would be --

i took a breath and kept talking, stumbling over the barricades of inhibition that i myself had put up in my mind:

i told you that i feel like a young tree with its boughs swaying in the wind. this was not a sway, though, it was a shake -- shaking caused by the elements around me keeping me so fragile that i might forget to keep holding my leaves out in my brittle fingers, or shaking because my position alone at the edge of a forest could cause me to lose my posture (out of a lack of confidence) and fall straight backwards into the unknown fields that stretched for miles behind me, with my flower-and-ivy crown dropping to the earth in a semblance of shame and my own forced humility

you wrinkled your nose at my metaphors and settled on telling me that i'm too shy:

(and through those words you told me that i couldn't be both shy and outgoing like i sometimes boast that i am during those times when i do like being around people, and at your implications my train of thought derailed as my mind screeched that i had to pick one or the other, while my legs below me shook as they remembered the constant shifting of plate tectonics and how i'd fall if I failed to choose a side. at the same time, my five senses plus one told me to jump before i'd trip over a stone of indecision into the lava between these choices: a molten pit that your friends want me to burn in)

you kept talking (perhaps oblivious to my mind's civil war) and laughed at me.

"you're too scared," you started: and yes, i am afraid (terrified) of crawling out of the depths of the murky grotto that I've trapped myself in for so long. if i leave now, people will see how bloody my fingernails have become from fishing in the dark and only scraping up pebbles from the bottom of the water. they'll laugh at the fluorescent sludge from the bottom of my cave that coats my hair from its follicles to its splitting tips.

an for the first time in a while, i actually responded, instead of just thinking about how much i’d like to die, my voice waxing and waning in a crescendo of ninety seven different emotions. i told you that i hate myself, and that maybe you hate me for hating myself, but, even so (and here's where my voice rises into some sort of scream that wears my vocal chords raw), you don't want me to love myself: you just want to laugh at me. you've shown me through your shallow spontaneity that you think that my pain and my hurt is a joke.

the first time i showed you my heart, and when i showed you my trust as i let you vivisect my emotions from my chest, all you did was laugh, laugh at me, laugh at what i was feeling. it hurt -- and -- you didn't even respond until a day or two later. even then, it was just a text message that said "sorry" without any emotion or capital letters.

you're like a wall that thinks that i don't deserve a roof to live under because you don't want to lend a shoulder (or a brick) to help hold it up for me.

(and that's fine. i guess -

but i'm still lonely)

(and, i know that you're only like this because you feel so alone too, yet you've become jaded to the emotions buried within your chest to the point that even a knife or ten knives between your ribs wouldn't make you bleed them out and talk to me about it. yet i wear my heart in blood and ink and tar smeared on my sleeve from the paper clips and pen nibs that i've jammed in between my bones too many times to count)

and maybe now, as my soliloquy draws to a close, the glittering in your eyes could be not an unspoken jab at me but instead some sort of compassion, empathy, or even love for me equal to my heart's incomprehensible platonic murmurings for you: and sometimes I wonder if you want to be lonely together (with something that's not love or hate, but perfectly in between)

but in those moments of sometimes, i know that it's just a dream, and that tomorrow, you'll be pretending that this conversation never happened at all.

-- 98% in Latin, but a questionable 2% in empathy

#apologies for horrible sound quality my mic isn’t that good let me know what you think!#izzy writes #cybie yells #cybie speaks #idek what this is #enjoy my high pitched voice shrug shrug #long post

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