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championsandheroes · 4 months

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It was sweet that Astarion was under the belief that no one would figure out he was a vampire before his big reveal. Most of us took one look at him and said "yep, that sure is a vampire right there." Most, however, doesn't include the party members. Some of these characters are supposed to be perceptive and intelligent, and I'm still convinced that if you press your ear against theirs you'd hear elevator music.

Over at Patreon, society6, and redbubble we don't let intellect devourers starve.

#champions and heroes #Baldur's Gate #Baldur's Gate 3 #Gale of Waterdeep #Shadowheart #Astarion #Tav #intellect devourer #your secret is safe with me Astarion #mainly because the game won't let me say anything #but I recommend that you bring him to meet the Gur hunter in act 1 before he has his reveal #that nervous energy he brings to the conversation is *chef's kiss*#adding the redbubble link again #because society6 is being a butt and has decided that you only get to have 10 designs going forward #unless you pay for the account #so uh... yeah

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estellardreams · 3 months

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Cute - Creepy

#I'm letting myself be self-indulgent with my OCs for once #And this is a going to be from an upcoming comic #So uh... Yeah #sonic #digital art #sonic fanart #sonic oc #If you wanna know what this is for...#I remember bringing up an idea for my next comic project #But I went with another project instead of that one #And this is the only plot point that just refuses to leave me alone

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asexualbert · 1 year

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Sooooo...

This one's getting long.

Have part 2 of this, which is apparently going to have at least three parts. (This is probably the longest one though)

Anyway, I'm sorry Jason...

———

Jason's body was on fire.

He didn't remember waking up.

Certainly, he had at some point, he was awake now after all, but it was as if he'd just clued in halfway through. As if his brain was too busy trying to process everything else that it had just... forgotten to let him know.

All he knew for sure was that it hurt.

Everything hurt so much.

He might have been crying, he couldn't really tell. Everything was so blurry and faraway, he couldn't focus. There was something running down his face though, he was pretty sure. Probably tears. Though maybe it was blood; there was something wet running down his back and somewhere around his hands too. That probably wasn't tears so he must be bleeding.

He shouldn't be bleeding.

The panic incited by that thought broke through the haze for just long enough to process it.

He wasn't there anymore. He'd escaped. He'd been saved. Why did everything hurt so much? And where was everyone? Shouldn't they be here? Making it better?Bruce had said he would take care of him. He always took care of him. He promised.

Why wasn't he here?

—————

It took herculean effort to pry his eyes open, he hadn't noticed before that he'd been squeezing them shut so hard, only to slam them closed again to block out the stabbing light as another wave of pain rushed through every part of him all at once.

Eyes closed then. He could... He could work with that.

Another wave of tears seemed to be rushing up, spilling down his face as he tried to breathe slowly enough to think through the pain.

His mouth tasted like blood and he swallowed thickly, burning his sore throat. Had he been yelling at some point?

That didn't matter now, as he carefully took another shaking deep breath, plucking up the courage to move enough to prod at his back. As soon as he'd composed himself as much as he thought possible, he picked up his left arm

And screamed.

All outside awareness was gone in an instant as a stabbing, burning, exploding pain shot from his deltoid all throughout the rest of his body. He writhed and it only made everything so much worse as burning, screaming muscles shifted.

It felt like he had barbed hatchets buried in his upper back, stabbing deep into him as they shifted with his movement. From somewhere around his tailbone there was shooting pain being sent down his legs and all throughout his waist, like he was being electrocuted and impaled all at once.

Somewhere at the edge of his consciousness, he noticed his arm drop back down and, as his fingers hit surface, another agonized scream ripped through him. There was more blood in his mouth now. He had half noticed biting his tongue, though it felt more like a steak knife being driven through it.

There was no part of him that didn't feel like it was on fire. Filled with knives. Exploding from the inside out.

He was dying. He was sure of it.

Maybe it was for the best, if only everything would just stop hurting.

—————

There were hands touching him. Poking and prodding and moving him around.

He couldn't think of any reason to stifle his sobs as the hands aggravated the burning.

He didn't think he had the energy to anyway.

He couldn't understand why they were hurting him. Shouldn't they be stopping when it hurt? There was someone who would have. Someone he should have been with right now. Someone who took care of him...

He couldn't remember who.

One of the hands touched part of his back, he couldn't place what, and moved it.

He was screaming again.

His throat felt like sand and his back felt like white hot flames. He couldn't think. He couldn't breathe. He could move, couldn't stop moving and it made everything else hurt too, but none as back as his back.

He was on fire. He was frozen. He was dying.

—————

The experiment was progressing brilliantly.

The subject had taken to the procedure better than any before it and it seemed, at this rate, highly likely to be their first true success.

They'd resumed sedation after the subject had fallen unconscious again. It would need its rest and its violent thrashing wouldn't lend well to the healthy development of its new features.

Between the disaster in which they'd found it and the medical work to get it into shape enough to handle the procedure, they'd put far too much work in over the last four months to risk it causing undue damage in its panic. They would release the sedation again once its limbs were developed enough to handle more movement.

For now, they'd leave it to its rest. They had new observations to report and, with such an optimistic outlook, they'd need to begin sorting out an enclosure for the creature.

#So uh... yeah #he's not having a good time #He's confused #jason todd #batfamily au #dragon au #batman #and here's the tags for the Stuff™#lemme know if I missed any #tortue #body horror #i think #blood #human experimentation #memory loss #sedation #pain

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brokenhardies · 2 years

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electric feel chapter 5 aka can you tell this is a crossover story?

#i reference robert markham aka morpheus right at the start #the wizard references his connections to the masters of the mystic arts #amber's initially skeptical of being the voice of the gods but changes her mind bc gods have been running around lately i.e. thor and loki #amber names the xavier institute by name #and the ennead is also named #so uh... yeah

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lesbianralzarek · 3 months

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"life doesnt get better, you just get stronger" does NOT include ages 11-17. life does in fact just get better from there. those years are dogshit. like, you do get stronger but its mostly just a factor of not being 11-17 anymore. positive thinking helps but it doesnt fix whatevers going on at 15, you have to brute force through that one raw

#i originally posted this as just a 'hey remember how fuckin bad middle/highschool was? shit was wild' type post but now #there are a bunch of teens in the notes being like 'oh my god are you serious? it gets better? im not stuck in hell forever??'#and im reminded that the only people who told teenage ella 'it gets better' were speakers at mental health assemblies #aka the least relatable people alive who were seemingly born to lie to you #so. uh. yeah im a certified adult who isnt here to lie or sugarcoat the realities of being a teenager #the only thing more certain than the pain is the transcience

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handmemyglockenspiel-imgoingin · 6 months

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No hate at all to any fans of the movie

BUT this is my first time seeing Coppola's Dracula and I am d y i n g so writing these random little notes is all I can do to cope

Disclaimer: This is not a review, this is not constructive criticism, this is me clinging to sanity by my notes app and laughing through the pain, commentary is all in good fun

[Bestie, if you're seeing this, don't read it, there are lots of spoilers. Yes, you. Hi! Ily <3]

uhh spoilers, language, and general ranting warning let's goooo

Wooooooo backstory

Everything is happening soveryfast and I don't quite like it. Slow burn whomst

They really kicked in with the intensely ominous background music early

Not Drac ranting to Jonathan about his oh-so-great family history on NIGHT ONE (this was so funny though)

I missed the part where he threw the mirror out the window :'(

"Foul bauble of man's vanity" bitch have you seen yourself? Well- actually no, but

"Maybe you should grow a beard" oh?? kinda gay

They quote the book word for word so often, but the characters are just - not- themselves

Keanu Reeves Jonathan has no survival instincts. 0/10 would not survive the paprika.

That was a clawed-ass hand that patted you on the shoulder just now, bro!!

They really went "hey what if sweet, kind, loving Lucy "I shouldn't say such things" Westenra was an absolute sex fiend!" and ran that into the ground

And my Mina, poor Mina

The way the juggled the proposal scenes-

Ah, yes, the 1890's nightgown!

Also why they gotta make Lucy sound like that

My poor girl

The way Art, Jack & Quincy see her suffering and go "oof" while they just kinda watch from a distance

like idk you should probably call a doctor or somethin' bro

I don't wanna talk about the vampiresses

[I'm currently typing to distract myself from the Drac/Mina happening on screen because I simply cannot]

[now she's?? hitting him? loves him? why not]

[MINA NO]

"Hey what if Mina cheated on her lame-ass unfaithful husband with some fucking old guy! No, it's hot! Look! He drinks blood!! Yum!"

"Perhaps I am a bad, inconstant woman" Mina NO

Why did they throw such a beautiful romance out the castle window like that

Quincy "Sounds like a goddamm witch doctor to me" Morris

Wrong cowboy but I'll take him

also What the FUCK, Van Helsing??

"Whore of darkness" I am so mad. "She is the devil's concubine" stfu

Whoever wrote Lucy like that needs to apologize to Ms. Westenra right now

Lucy being brutally murdered while the newly unhappily wedded Harkers make out in a church is also a no

"I just wanna cut off her head and take out her heart" SIR

I do love how absolutely unhinged Van Helsing's dialogue is for him to sound so casual

Jon's just... so very Keanu

"Gentlemen, must we desecrate poor Lucy's grave? She died horribly enough." Arthur's tone delivery got me on that one

Where is the Suitor Squad camaraderie?? The bromance?? The love???

I expected my boys to be forgotten and instead we got some assholes with their names

ARTHUR HAS A GUN TO VAN HELSING'S HEAD. IN WHAT WORLD-

Arthur's mustache is the only Arthur thing about him

THE WAY SHE DROPPED THAT BABY

Oof

Ah, cockblocking with the crucifix, classic Van Helsing

WHAT THE FUCK VAN HELSING, redux

"During your infidelity to those creatures" MY JONATHAN WOULD NEVER

Those grey streaks don't make up for what you did to my boy

Oh, how could I forget the atrocities they committed against Renfield

"It seems I've been rather naughty" hwhshshsh Renfield. Baby. Stop talking.

Mina is not trying to seduce Van Helsing right now. If I don't look it's not happening.

"You are whores of satan" that's not very nice, Van Helsing

Is Mina... practicing- witchcraft? Aight

Mina has a gun on Jonathan, what a turn of events

I- noooo

...that. Uh. Was that. Huh.

#documenting my first time watching this to cope #Winona Ryder was still very badass as Mina #and the actors are all fantastic #but I...#this just wasn't it for me #I love these characters too much and it hurt to see them like this #but anyway #I don't really enjoy complaining but I just wanted to ramble a little so I didn't annoy anyone with it irl instead #So uh... yeah #Read Dracula! 👍#If you want #I'm not your mum #justice for the harkers

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deadmomjokes · 2 years

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PSA: tomatoes are not spicy. Tomatoes and tomato products should not be spicy. Pizza sauce isn't inherently spicy. Tomato-based pasta sauce is not spicy. Ketchup is NOT spicy.

If tomatoes are spicy, you have an allergy to tomatoes.

This announcement brought to you by my almost 29-year-old husband learning for the first time in his 2.8 decades of putting food products into his mouth that spaghetti and saucy pizza aren't spicy foods