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ossifer-bones · 6 months

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the paul poll compelled me to just quickly write up my little opinion piece on paul and necromancy in the tlt verse bcs tags are a pain in the ass to elaborate on my opinion in: paul horrifies me. i think that a lot of people read palamedes' interpretation of lyctorhood as being some sort of objective truth and that there is a right way to do lyctorhood and paul is it, but i just don't agree with that; i think in a series rife with unreliable narrators, palamedes' views on lyctorhood should be considered as subjective as any other person's.

“Can one person even be two people? I feel like I’ve only got enough room inside for me, and sometimes like that room’s not even enough.” “Lyctors can,” said Palamedes, “or at least—they thought they could; in fact all they became were half-dead cannibals. I think a true Lyctorhood is a mutual death … a gravitational singularity creating something new. A true Grand Lysis, rather than the Petty Lysis of the megatheorem [...]

what he says here about lysis is in response to nona asking if one person can be two people, and thus it is a very loaded statement when coming from someone heralding from a society where the extreme co-dependence of the fundamentally unequal necro/cav bond is encouraged, especially considering camilla and palamedes are called out by others from that same society as being an exemplary case of co-dependence in that department!

camilla and palamedes are arguably more equal than any other cav/necro pair in series, in part due to that co-dependence, but we even see in NtN that cam does stuff that undercuts that equality (telling pyrrha to lie to palamedes, 'don't tell him i was weak'). and that equality, that love, is shown to be thought of as coming at the cost of freedom: when palamedes says, “I cannot bear the thought of using you.”—camilla responds, “Love and freedom don’t coexist, Warden.”

in the end, every permutation of the necro and cav pairing is irrevocably descended from john + alecto's example and while i think beauty can be found in some of them, they all suffer from the same fundamental imbalance that bond hinges on; nonconformity abates it, but abolishment is required for real freedom from it. the so-called indelible sin of lyctorhood is just an echo of the original sin john committed.

If there was one thing Gideon knew about necromancers, it was that they needed power. Thanergy—death juice—was abundant wherever things had died or were dying. Deep space was a necro’s nightmare, because nothing had ever been alive out there, so there were no big puddles of death lying around for Harrow and her ilk to suck up with a straw.

necromancy necessitates consumption, taking by its very nature: death, especially violent death, is what fuels it—infants producing more thanergy on death is literally a noted phenomena! paul's birth, while it could be seen as triumphant in the sense of it being an act of creation, is literally identified by palamedes himself as a mutual death, death being required to fuel it the same as any other necromantic working. i don't want to say 'necromancy is fundamentally evil' but uh... it is irrevocably tied into john's conception of human nature: "This is the problem, the incorporation, this is the hardest part … It’s the human instinct, to take."

something i always point out about camilla and palamedes' grand lysis is theparallel with gideon and harrow's incomplete petty lysis: both come about as a result of a fully-realised lyctor (ianthe, cytherea) having cornered the pair, resulting in both being threatened with imminent death (camilla critically injured and palamedes facing expulsion from naberius when ianthe re-emerges; harrow necromantically spent and gideon having suffered multiple injuries, both going to die when cytherea breaks through the bone dome). paul's birth only happened as a direct result of the continuation of the lyctoral cycle of violence, with ianthe in cytherea's position; per palamedes, “I am not saying this was our inevitable end … I am saying we have found the best and truest and kindest thing we can do in this moment.”

paul may be the best and truest and kindest thing cam and pal could've done in that moment, but that moment should've never came to pass: the codependency instilled into them through their society, the violence that put them in that position, and the consumptive necromancy that made paul possible. paul is horrifying because they are the most hopeful and kind thing, and they are the product of two people, one sans his own body, undergoing mutual death to fuel their birth.

they're the truest response to one flesh, one end: an oath purportedly coined by cristabel and alfred, who compelled their necromancers to ascend via a suicide pact.

valancy says one flesh one end sounds like instructions for a sex toy. can’t stop thinking about that so can someone stop cris and alfred before the sex toy phrase catches on, thanks.

did the sex toy phrase really need a response?

#the locked tomb #nona the ninth spoilers

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 2 months

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Was i the asshole for "insinuating" my friend's husband attempted to poisoned me?

I 26cisf have always, since I was quite young, had a fear of people tampering with my food and drinks. If I leave a drink or food in a room with others, my immediate thought when I sit back down is to taste test it to see if it tastes different or see if it looks different. If it dose, I immediately throw it away, wash or get a new dish/bowl/glass/etc and get a new serving. This fear isn't unfounded as, when I was 7 or 8, my dad spit in my bowl of soup and I caught him. He hated me so this wasn't unexpected. Later in life I had 2 different abusive partners threaten to drug me and as a result, all food is suspicious the moment it's left alone with anyone. I've done this to my husband on occasion and he understands.

Earlier this month, I, my husband 26tm, a friend of mine 25cf and her husband 53cm all had a nice dinner together at my apartment. Later on in the evening, our husbands went to play on his xbox in the living room while me and my friend had a drink in the kitchen. The kitchen "ends" right where the living room begins so they were on a couch about 15ft away from us, again, its an apartment. I've been friends with her since middle school so I have no reason to suspect her but her husband is creepy towards me and our mutual friends of our age and is much older than her. I put up with him for her sake and never made an ill comment other than a week after they started dating with concerns about their age gap. My friend and her husband dated for about 8 months and have been married for about 4 months. My husband and friend left so he could show her some break time levels from Mario wonder on the switch in our room while her husband sat on his phone on the couch. My husband mentioned it over dinner, my friend showed interest but wasn't sure so he offered to show her.

I felt ackward and had to pee so I went to the bathroom and when I came back, her husband had changed positions on the couch and I'm pretty sure my drink wasn't in the same place I left it by 2 to 4 inches. I was instantly nervous and took a sip and it didn't taste right. As I was pouring out my drink in the sink, my husband and friend came back and she saw me doing it and glanced once quickly at her husband. I barely turned my head so I'm not sure how she realized I suspected him a little. She knows about my fear and knew how I handled it a few times when I feared she had done something however.... Apparently doing this while mildly suspecting her husband was too far and she absolutely exploded on me out of no where.

She said I was implying her husband was a rapist or abuser or creep and that it was two faced of me to invite people over who I thought might poison me or fuss with my food. She said I always take that fear too far in public settings, which isn't true as I've never done this with groups of people bigger than 3 or 4 friends nor do I vocally accuse them. I just reset my food and move on as it eases my anxiety about it. Her husband got super defensive and started getting my face and my husband diffused the situation by sending them both home. My friend blew up my phone that night and eventually she blocked me for a week before coming back to apologize for her actions but asking me to apologize to her husband for making him feel bad. I told her it was her who made it seem like I was accusing him, not me for doing something she's seen me do a million times.

Eventually it went away but every time I see her, she asks if I'm going to apologize soon but I'm just not sure if what I did was really as offensive as she made it seem. I don't genuinely believe that he tried to poison or roofie me but if there's even a 10% chance, my anxiety is through the roof and I pass out if I just try to push through. No one else, after knowing this fear, has taken it personally as it's just the remains of trauma and fundamentally harmless. Once I'm reset, I often totally forget the scare and they've acted like nothing ever happened. Was i the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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jwirecs · 1 year

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Recommended BTS Fics of January 2023💖

hello, hello! here are my bts recs of january! hopefully these beautiful stories get more recognition as well as the writers 💝

** anything in parentheses and bolded are my thoughts that can be disregarded if needed **

🔞smut || 💔angst || 💕fluff || ✅completed || 🔄ongoing || 💯favorite

Break The Ice ( pt2 ) || @yoonivy🔞💕✅💯💯

↳ There are three rules to become an official Puck Bunny: 1. You have to love hockey. No exceptions. 2. You have to had slept with at least three hockey players. Starters, no benchwarmers. 3. And most importantly, have fun! (oh child that ending. oh sweet mother lord.)

Perhaps Love || @mangowillow💕💔✅

↳ for as long as you can remember, you have been in love with your childhood friend turned roommate, but jeon jungkook remains oblivious even when he comes to comfort and help you sleep every night.

Cupid’s On Holiday || @persphonesorchid🔞💕💔✅

↳ You don’t get it, you’re a damn catch. Anyone would be lucky to have you. You’re smart, you’re tidy, hell you’d give up your own kidney to a homeless guy if he needed it that bad. So what the issue? Failed relationships, blind date after blind date, and now your friend’s competitive archery teammate is telling you he’s Cupid here to help you find your one true love. You’re not that desperate. He could take those golden arrows and shove ‘em.

University Superstar ( pt2 ) || @jungkookstatts🔞💕💔✅

↳ Jeon Jungkook is your University’s biggest rock-star-athlete-hot guy. It literally prides itself on his attendance at the school — walking around with his “big name” (captain of the lacrosse team), tattoos, and rude, jock-like personality. You hate him. You hate that he can’t apologize for being a complete asshole. But what you don’t hate is how he visits your office every day. You also don’t hate that your feelings for him are crawling back into your system…

Are You Ready, Angel? || @gukkieslover🔞💕💔🔄

↳ jus your first time with sweetheart boyfriend koo, some plot there and could maybe be a series if people like it enough?? (link is to their masterlist!)

In Plain Sight || @bangtanstanst💕✅

↳ A secret relationship isn’t exactly easy to hide, especially not when you work together – and when you make the most of some alone time during a grocery run, you get a little careless. A little too much so, perhaps.

Jealousy || @ryulvrsblog 💕✅

↳ Jungkook brings his pretty girlfriend to a meet up with his old college friends who oc has never met before, normally oc would shy away from social interactions like these, but when she sees a girl taking interest in her boyfriend, oc decides to take matters into her own hands. oc gets jealous and kisses jk twice, jk is in shock at his girlfriends bold actions, jk gets a little possesive too

Jealousy 101 || @bluewhale52🔞✅

↳ Yoongi posts his Hip Hop 101 video on BangtanTV and shakes his booty for all Army to see. Unfortunately he forgets that ONE person gets dibs on first viewing.

Letting Off Steam || @wnderkoo 💕✅

↳ a bad day on track has jungkook storming off and disappearing. where else would one find him but in the comforting arms of his loving girlfriend?

Clingy || @bonny-kookoo🔞💔🔄

↳ In which Jungkook is a professional hybrid heat-partner who just wants to do his job (ngl i might have to read this one again because i forgot how it went)

Human || @angelicfangz🔞💕💔🔄

↳ humanity is evil it can be something so twisted but it has its honey gems. It has people so sweet that your teeth hurt. You had those people and you messed it up resulting in you losing them but what happens when you find yourself in a hybrid sanctuary by the same people who made you feel what you've always wanted, human.

Wait, Little Rabbit || @bangtanflirt 🔞💕💔🔄💯

↳ You, a meek little bunny hybrid, find family amongst six predator hybrids and their lovely human caretaker.

Candy Cane || @oneofthemillionarmy💕💔✅💯

↳ SUMMARY LINE: CHRISTMAS PROMPT #19: CHARACTER A DOESN’T FEEL THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT BUT CHARACTER B, WHO LIVES ABOVE THEM, KEEPS PLAYING CHRISTMAS CAROLS REALLY LOUD.

Entombed || @97erstan🔞💕💔✅

↳ (no summary but fighter!jk + drama???? yes pls)

Hooking || @mapofthesea 🔞💕💔✅💯💯

↳ The home opener of hockey season is crazy for everyone, but when star defensemen Kim Taehyung takes a specific interest in you, who are you to turn him down?

How Many Things || @myg-butterfly💕💔✅

↳ Yoongi invites you out to a party with him, and in trust, you say yes. But what happens when you lose him in the crowd, just to find him again with someone else by his side? In the midst of panic and longing, you wonder how many things he thinks about before he gets to you.

Motor Head || @jeonjcngkook 🔞💔✅

↳ jungkook doesn’t like seeing someone else have your attention, so he decides he’s gonna do something about it.

Much Better || @yoonivy🔞💕💔✅💯

↳ On a night out with your girlfriends to let loose and forget about your ex, you meet a man that you are instantly attracted to, like magnets on the dance floor. But he reminds you way too much of the one that broke you heart… Can Kim Taehyung prove to you that he is not like your ex at all?

Pink Sapphire || @jiminrings💕💔✅💯💯💯

↳ having jungkook for a husband is great as far as arranged marriages could go; he’s easy to love. your relationship’s perhaps become so easy that jungkook doesn’t think sometimes — and that’s what makes it the easiest for you to hate him. alternatively, you and jungkook married each other for business, but the both of you stay for love.

Placebo || @bangtangalicious 🔞💕💔🔄

↳ a scientific compatibility test matches you with your soulmate, except he's everything you hate and you're everything he stands against.

Camboy!Tae Mini Series || @hisunshiine 🔞💕💔✅

↳ Give me all of your love, gimme something to dream about. KTH is your favorite camboy, and as a loyal subscriber, you are chosen to test out some new features on the platform he uses to go live. He’s really good at selling his viewers a dream, and as a thanks to a new milemark he’s hit on the platform, he’s choosing one winner to get their fantasy scene. (summary is of the first part! and i fully enjoyed reading this)

I See You || @i-am-baechu🔞💕💔✅💯

↳ The L/N family has always been different from other families. For starters, they see ghosts. Y/N hated this gift but as she grew older, she became used to it. Through her college years, she hasn’t seen that many ghosts but that was because they all left alone after her breakdown towards an upcoming test. When one of her classmates has a ghost attached to him, she realizes she needs to get rid of the ghost because it was starting to annoy her with the constant talking and poking her head. How come she never noticed his smile or his bright brown eyes before?

Do check out all of the other BTS Fics that i have reblogged as well!!

** if there is any fics that you guys would like to recommend, please do! i am slowly running out of fics to read **

#bts scenarios #bts fluff #bts angst #bts smut #bts strangers to lovers au #bts friends to lovers au #bts hybrid au #bts mafia au #bts established relationship au #bts enemies to lovers au #bts fic recs #bts recs

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jmdbjk · 6 months

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Golden

Kookie had a runny nose. He said when he's just hanging out with nothing to do he's fine but as soon as things start ramping up and getting hectic, the cold that won't go away comes back. Jimin was on to something when he said he was concerned about Jungkook staying healthy with such a busy schedule.

As usual he has stayed true to himself and I admire that a person of his age can be so honest about himself.

He was trying to keep it real and said things to lower everyone's expectations: About writing songs, he said he can't really write songs. He said he just doesn't have it in him. He said when he tries it always ends up being about Army.

He wondered if it was because he was so simple. This is what makes me love him as just a human being: he says things about himself that WE might not agree with but that he feels about himself. He's just so honest and unpretentious, and he doesn't even try to be that, he just is himself.

He said he thinks he doesn't have the intellect and that he doesn't have anything to write about, and if he HAD things to write about, he couldn't say them prettily and that there are so many other talented creators that he would just fall short. He mentioned RM, Yoongi, Hobi... they are so talented.

It is understandable that Kookie, being last, he saw what the other members did, and truly, it had to be intimidating. He may never feel confident enough but I bet if he gives it a try he’ll do great.

All of what he said adds another nuance as to why he said “something amazing" is coming when he did that live back in March and Set Me Free Pt 2 was about to drop. He saw how hard Jimin worked through that process and the end result WAS amazing. Intimidating indeed.

Perhaps he still needs to live some life before he can have enough emotional baggage to pour out some lyrics (lol). Give it time, Kookie, life will throw some shit at you. Or maybe expressing whatever is inside of him will never come out in words to a song. And its ok. Not everyone is a songwriter or poet.

I can accept this album as "this is where he is in his life right now". He said they worked fast. That's a lot to accomplish in the amount of time from start to finish.

My thoughts on the songs...

The lyrics to several of these songs are a little ... meh..., sort of disconnected. THAT BEING SAID... I can see some lyrics that probably did resonate with him.

But I am not going to focus so much on the lyrics but more on JK's vocal work and think about how he was trying to sing and pronounce well. THAT is what he was trying to do. He said lyrics are lyrics and images are images... they are not meant to be autobiographical so the lyrics will be secondary to the vocal production for me.

Jungkook explained that the pronunciation was a challenge. The producers each had their own idea of how the lyrics should be delivered to achieve the color of the song. English not being JK's first language, he was coached on what to do in the studio. He said especially pronouncing the "EEE" sound was a challenge.

I recognize some sounds that seem trendy. Some of the songs remind me of other songs I've heard in the past by other artists.

Closer has that flute and Afro beat that reminds me of another song but I just can't remember it right now.

Standing Next to You is giving me Michael Jackson Rock With You from his Off the Wall album or Remember the Time off his Dangerous album. A rockin' groove... "... when it's deep like DNA..." and "leave your body golden like the sun and the moon..." yes, those lyrics definitely resonate.

Yes or No, I can definitely hear the Ed Sheeran throughout that song. A nice song about that first thrill of love. Ed Sheeran is a great song writer. I've always liked his work.

Please Don't Change would probably be the song that comes closest to expressing how Jungkook feels about his fans. Though his life has been spent on camera, things might change and if he's no longer on camera, he'll still be the same but he hopes we please don't change. This song also has the same little flute sound as Closer.

Hate You. This is the Shawn Mendes song. It is one of those angsty relationship songs that are popular now like what Olivia Rodrigo and her ilk does. If Jungkook had not gotten this song, I could see it easily going to a female artist. It's quite painful. Kookie does a great job expressing the tragic drama of it all with his vocals.

Somebody is where he really lets loose with his range. Its a sad song. Like many, his opening lines had me doing a double take. I don't think we've ever heard Jungkook sing in this tone before? Very nice.

Too Sad To Dance. This is the kind of song I think Jungkook could write. It is simple and straightforward. The song is cute and poignant at the same time. He was able to keep his tone simple to match the vibe, he didn’t try to make it over the top… I love this song especially the very last line: "...you don't need no one to dance..." Stand on your own and be yourself, just like Kookie is doing.

Shot Glass Full of Tears is the best song on the album. There, I said it. He really reached down and brought JUST enough edge into his voice to pull it off. I could actually get emotional over this song. I will repeat, this is the best song on the album.

Well done, Jungkook.

Overall, Kookie is relieved the pressure is off. Now he can get out there and do what he’s knows he can do and that’s performing

And then he said it again: BTS is the most important thing to him.

Kookie knew he had to do this album. And now he's done it and ready to move forward.

When he finally realized Tae had commented:

The panic over his house not being clean hahahahahah!

Because he wasn't sure what kind of chaos they were going to bring to his house, Kookie ended the live in a stress-clean panic.

My, what a turn of events... not long ago he was laying in bed naked causing mayhem trying to convince Jimin to let him come over and take a shower and now here they come to his house bringing trouble LMAO!

I hope they had a great evening together. I loved seeing Tae and Jimin out and about, it really hits a spot in my heart.

A little while ago, I picked up a copy of Golden at Target, I don't know which photo card is the Target exclusive but this is what I got:

It's a nice package with a hard cover photo book and a case it slides into. The stickers are nice. Jungkook was wearing an earring with the that motif so I suppose it will show up as merch on the Weverse shop soon.

Anyway, that's my review of Golden.

#jungkook golden #vmin #vminkook #jimin #taehyung

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adachimoe · 7 months

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Random stuff from the Persona Club P4 book

I leafed through the Club book and more of the meta and setting stuff stood out to me than the character stuff. 🤓

The origins of Yasoinaba: The meta developer corner notes that Yasoinaba gets its name from the Hare of Inaba legend. Yaso comes from Okuninushi's brethren who are collectively called the yasogami. Samegawa is also a reference to the Hare of Inaba. In the myth, the hare went on the backs of sharks to reach the territory that would eventually be called Inaba. "Same" is shark, and "kawa/gawa" is river. The animal mascot in Inaba is the rabbit. Not because of the myth, though, but because there's a bunch of rabbits somewhere if you follow the Samegawa lol. The town plant is broadleaf cattail.

Tatsuhime Shrine: It's noted that Toyotamahime is the enshrined deity at Tatsuhime shrine. This is a kinda indirect reference to the Hare of Inaba. Toyotamahime was a sea creature who could transform into a human. Her sea creature form was said to be similar to that of a crocodile or a shark (see the above about the Hare of Inaba). Actually, my first blog post on here was about Toyotamahime and the woman at the shrine.

The staging area of the TV world: The design of the people on the ground on the floor of the staging area when you enter the TV world from Junes is the result of the main characters having murder on the brain when they first enter the TV.

The location of Junes: The Yasoinaba branch of Junes is located near the highway so it brings incidental business to town because people who are driving through will also stop there, not just Inaba locals.

Junes wages: Start at 690 yen per hour for high school students, and 900 yen per hour for others. (Per Google, this was like $6.67 / $8.70 per hour in 2008 when the game came out.)

Yosuke's dad's name: Yoichi Hanamura (花村陽一).

The origins of Konishi Liquor: A member of Atlus's battle team is named Konishi and their family actually owns a liquor store. Early on in development, the team just called the place "Konishi Liquor" as a placeholder after the developer and the name stuck. (The text specifically says this is about a Konishi on the battle team, so it's not referring to the composer who is also named Konishi.)

The in-universe history of Inaba: Yasoinaba developed as a mountain castle town with ties to Takeda Shingen. (This is a reference to the actual area in Yamanashi where Atlus drove to and used as a model for the shopping district.) Later, it became a coal mining town. But the coal mine has since closed. (I believe the coal mine part is fictional and isn't supposed to correlate to Yamanashi.)

Mayumi's Room and Saki's Shopping District: Originally, Mayumi's room and the shopping district with Konishi Liquor were a lot bigger and more similar to the size of the other dungeons in the time period after they were pushed into the TV. Once inside, they became lost in the maze and had to confront their shadows. But once the person who created these spaces/images died, these two places shrunk in size, hence the smaller areas you see in-game. The smaller parts are like "cores" of these once larger areas that remain behind. The book likens the small spaces / "cores" to ghosts that haunt the spots where they died.

Magatsu Inaba and Magatsu Mandala: Unlike the other dungeons, which sprung from repressed thoughts, Adachi's Magatsu Inaba was intentionally created to lure in the Investigation Team and confuse them. From the yellow caution tape, you can sense that a part of him still knows he's a detective.

The bit about the caution tape, I think you can read it also as an explanation to why he sends you the letter about the true ending - there is still detective'ing to be done. But like, I'm just gonna pretend I didn't read that. The tape says CAUTION KEEP OUT WARNING because babygirl has a hard time with feelings and people. Fuck you Atlus. Also, I guess his place being "intentionally" created is related to why he got to pick the entrance being in Mayumi's room.

Shadows: The shadows in Persona 4 aren't really the same as Persona 3. The book tells you to think of them separately as the ones in Persona 4 don't really directly harm people - they remain in the unconscious rather than appear in reality and shank people. Shadows in the TV world attack Persona users because they sense danger from Persona users and just instinctively know to attack them. Compared to Persona 3, there are more silly shadows because the Midnight Channel is influenced by the people who watch it.

Mitsuo Kubo's backstory: Mitsuo was a student at Yasogami High until Morooka caught him messing around in a downtown area, after which he was suspended from school for a week. This wrecked his ego / pride so badly that he dropped out of Yasogami High and held a grudge against Morooka. Btw, Hashino also mentions in this long interview that Mitsuo was originally not going to kill Morooka.

References to the Kirijo Zaibatsu: When Dojima tries to reach Nanako in November, he gets a pre-recorded message about the KJ phone service and Nanako's phone being off. "KJ" stands for "Kirijo". Additionally, when Naoto mentions that she did research and found info about shadows becoming Personas, this info was leaked from a Kirijo research lab.

Did Kashiwagi seriously book the kids at a love hotel?: The love hotel on Shirakawa from Persona 3 was renovated (kind of) into a regular hotel by the time of Persona 4.

Yomenai Bookstore: Yomenai means "unreadable". The owner's last name is actually Yomenai, and they didn't realize their last name wasn't a good match for running a bookstore until after they opened up business. School kids started making fun of the store, which bothered Yomenai at first, but they left the store open and now stock mostly books related to their own hobbies. In other words, the majority of the books at the store are "unreadable" to regular people.

#persona club p4 #japanese mythology #yosuke hanamura #mayumi yamano #saki konishi #tohru adachi #mitsuo kubo #persona 4 #persona 3

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dextixer · 7 months

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"Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me", "Once its happenstance, twice its a coincidence, thrice is deliberate", " The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. "

Many quotes/sayings exist in many different languages and many different cultures, all carrying the same meaning. The meaning that while mistakes can and WILL happen, a person should learn from those mistakes to not repeat them. Making mistakes is natural, understandable. Repeating those same mistakes over and over however, indicates a problem, a problem that rarely has an excuse.

RT is no different in this regard. As always, we are at the point where the crew commentary is released, that part of the year when many a critic and fan can read the thought of the crew producing RWBY, and despair at what they see.

It was revealed and i think known a bit before the recent days that RWBY Volume 9 had an entire episode cut, in the second part of the show. It was "unforseen" complications that lead the crew needing to cut a lot of stuff and keep the "most important" parts of the episodes, thats why after Ruby suicide the cut-away seemed so strange.

While i did not see CRWBY make any excuses (yet) about this besides saying that it happened, many fans are already doing it for them, simply saying that these are just "expected" things in production, that CRWBY are not to blame, and yet, they are.

Priorities

First of all, CRWBY are the ones who decide on what parts of the show to prioritize in production. On Twitter Eddy Rivas confirmed that episodes 1-7 were fully produced before episodes 8+ were. The argument presented there is that the solution of "Cutting things from 1-7 and add more to 8+" doesnt work because they were both done at different times of production.

While that is true it does pose a question on why exactly does CRWBY keep doing this then? This problem is not new, the fact that many of RWBY volumes are very back-ended and it causes problems is not new and has been known for a long time now. This is the reason why in most of the Volumes, critics usually focus on things that happen at the end of the Volume, because that is when most of the problems with things like writing occur.

So why continue doing this? So many of RWBY plotlines can be better distributed alongside the entire Volume instead of trying to cram it in at the last second. Lets take for example a character like Oscar. Volume 7 proved that Oscar and his relationship/changes due to Ozpin can be very well done if its all distributed properly in the Volume. Compare this to V6 where it all has to happen offscreen just because "There is no time" to explore Oscar.

Why is then so much of V9 so back-ended? Apparently there was going to be an explanation there that Neo gained her new powers because she landed in the God of Darkness acre. The Ascencion phenomena was going to be expanded upon. We have Ruby and her suicide. We have Jaunes break-down. We have Rubys break-down and i could go on.... and on.... There is just SO MUCH there, why?

The explanations of Neos powers could have been done earlier in the Volume. Ascencion could have been distributed during the entire V9 etc.

Instead we have parts of an episode focused on a talking trash panda that ends up not mattering as an example?

It just feels like the wrong things are prioritized in the show and most of them are back-loaded to such an extent that its INEVITABLE that it will cause a point of failure. Just like it did the REST of the times with the preceding Volumes. Why has that lesson not been learned yet?

When one builds something, the most important first parts are a skeleton. You can do the rest later, but you should have the MAIN feature of your product finished first, everything else is extra. And yet it seems that RWBY constantly tries to do everything at once and then when they inevitably fail to actually finish it all, they start cutting important stuff.

Ambition

The other problem is that there is just SO MUCH SHIT that they want to do. They want to use the Ever After to confirm BB and to further give their relationship time. They want to focus on Neo, her new powers (Now related to the God of Darkness). They want the Ever-After to explore Ruby and Jaune and their developments after V8. They want to explore the concepts of acceptance and reincarnation. They want to develop a new character, Little. They want to connect the Ever-After with the gods of RWBY. Thats just SOME of what they tried to focus on, and at the end of the day, isnt it a bit much?

This always happens with RWBY, the show writers dont seem to understand their limitations and they try to cram as MANY ideas as they can into a Volume, when that Volume wont be able to properly develop those ideas in the first place. This is why a lot of RWBY kingdom arcs feel like they miss an entire extra Volume, be it Mistral or Atlas. They simply have no time to develop the concepts they want.

But instead of cutting down on them and focusing on whats most important, they keep stuffing more and more things into the show. And then decide "Well, people will understand/guess what we kept offscreen".

Did you know that Neo got her new powers with Jabberwocker (Basically, literal fucking death?) because she landed in an Acre that belonged to the gods of RWBY? Well, we were supposed to "Guess" or "Understand" that according to the writers. HOW? I have no idea. But we were "Supposed to".

This is the kind of thing, this bloat that plagues many an indie development. Where the developers/makers just add more and more features that pop into their heads, instead of focusing on what they already have and is important.

Understandable in V1-V3. But holy hell RT is a full on corporation right now, so now its no longer understandable.

End Word

Anyways, apologies for being missing in a large capacity for this, entire month i think? Way too much stuff to do, also got involved with wiki editing, which takes a lot of time. Next thread will be next week and i will focus on the suicide/reincarnation/acceptance message that the Volume tried to portray, because the crew commentary has given me more info to talk about.

"Budget" and "Cuts" stop being excuses for the shows writing when its a regular occurrence.

#rwby #rwde #crwby #roosterteeth #rwby volume 9

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aspoonofsugar · 5 months

Note

So what are your thoughts on kana now having black holes in her eyes instead of a galaxy? and did you ever think we would ever get dark kana? because i was honestly surprised aka gave her that because i thought the dark eyes will be for the hoshino's only

I had not noticed, but you are right! Her eyes do look like black holes here...

In general, I think Dark Kana is necessary for Kana to grow and I am excited about this development. As I have written here:

If Kana wants to shine, she needs to experience shadows. If she wants to have healthy bonds with others, she needs to discover and accept their darkness. She is slowly going through this process.

I talk about others' darkness, but for Kana to start exploring her own shadows makes a lot of sense:

According to Jung, the shadow is what people repress and ignore, like Kana's negative feelings towards Ruby. These emotions are not only about Ruby, though, but rather they are about Kana's own acting career. As a matter of fact Kana's whole arc is about her rediscovering her own selfishness and need to shine:

As a child, Kana shines so brightly that she dazzles everyone. Still, she has a difficult personality, so she is left behind once she grows up. As a result, she matures and learns to work well with others, even if it means she has to sacrifice her own light for everyone's sake. Both Aqua and Akane notice this and try to help her shine again, in their own ways. Still, before Kana can truly explode in a bright galaxy, she should explore her darkest self and learn about others' darkness. It is not by chance that she starts this journey by trying Akane's acting approach:

Akane acts by looking inside. She analyzes her character and empathizes with her, so that she can become a new person and play naturally every part. Basically, Akane plunges into people's shadows with no fear. Kana here is doing the same. She is stepping into Nino's darkness and by doing so she is discovering new things about herself:

This is important on multiple levels:

Psychologically, Kana is facing the heart of her trauma. She faces her feelings of jealousy, which are the result of her low self-esteem born from the belief she isn't enough.

Plot-wise, she is becoming Nino, as Ruby is becoming Ai. Considering Nino is probably involved in Ai's death, it is possible Kana's link with Nino will lead to new discoveries.

Thematically, this movie is about understanding Ai, live her story again, but change its ending. From Ai's tragedy to the twins' happy ending. Nino and Ai's relationship could never be mended, while Kana and Ruby's will. Kana is right now surrounded by darkness, but she will escape them and shine once again. She will restore her friendship with Ruby and help her.

Finally, Kana's choice to show her true feelings to Ruby makes her similar to Ai:

In the end, Kana hurting Ruby is just an attempt to love her. Even when she is showing her friend her genuine negative feelings, she is doing so to help Ruby grow. Kana who never feels loved is right now trying to show love in the wrong way. Just like Ai is a person who was never loved and could not love. Kana is wrapping herself in a lie, just like Ai did. It is just that Ai's lie was "love", while Kana's one is "hate".

Kana is currently growing as an actress because she is experiencing lies and how complex and intertwined with truth they can be. It is not pretty, but it is necessary both for her art to bloom and for her to eventually be able to see the truth about her loved ones. Ruby, Aqua and Akane. Only in this way she can go back to shine brightly for them.

On another note, I wonder if instead Akane will grow in the opposite reaction by trying a more reactive and "bright" kind of acting. I think she should as she has many pieces of information that if shared could help save Aqua.

Thank you for the ask!

#oshi no ko #onk #onk meta #oshi no ko meta #asksfullofsugar #kana arima #anonymous #my meta

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gigidragonbbxxx · 1 month

Text

a personal struggle + an education

this is all just gigi's opinions + thoughts

Reader, I'm struggling with empathy right now.

Don't worry, I'm not suffering from a personality pathology, I promise I am quite sympathetic and empathetic. It's just battling the feeling of wanting to be kind but also seeing a major problem and knowing I need to get it off my chest.

Let me give it to yall straight (with tweaked/paraphrased details to protect privacy and not to out anyone):

I saw a favorite loass coach/twt account/subliminal creator make fun of an "old timey" English sentence either from Neville Goddard or Edward Art. They proceeded to say that they "hate" it and "why can't they just say it simpler". and then someone else commented "they're talking bullshit fr".

The convo thread on twt devolved into an echo chamber that essentially boiled down to the old fool's adage "If I don't understand it, it must be stupid and not worth it."

This really triggered me because

The phrase quoted was not that hard to understand.

It was clear these women were not educated

Why am I judging or mad at people for their ignorance? (this is why I kept quiet on twt and went here to vent. I acknowledge that two things can be true, I can be kind and still be honest.)

I was and currently am still wrestling with these things within me.

On one hand I don't want to judge. I want to be inclusive and welcoming and supportive.

On the other hand - yall don't look educated, yall wind up looking dumb.

I'll say a harsh truth yall and you can go argue with a damn wall but I know I'm right: stupidity is not cute.

My Hot Take (not so hot when you think about it)

The Law of Assumption rewards those who feed their mind with knowledge

Before you argue with me, think about it. Seriously.

I don't want to seem ableist if someone suffers from dyslexia or if someone struggles in school. It's totally okay to have different paths to learning. The importance is still obtaining the information. You can read or listen to the audiobook, etc. The paths to knowledge are varied but in the end the result is the same - THE KNOWING.

The "old timey" sentence that the creator complained about COULD BE READ BY NINTH GRADERS BECAUSE OF SHAKESPEARE EXPOSURE.

That's why I was exasperated. They were complaining about English (the only language in which they are fluent) that is regularly taught to 14 year olds.

Guys. Stand up. Please stand the fuck up.

Who in this world is gonna take you seriously without BASIC COMPETENCY in literature or math?

Lemme roast some of yall if you want to disagree:

Yall wanna be master manifesters and claim to understand the double slit experiment but can't even name the fundamental laws of science or explain them.

Yall wanna be successful in your businesses and don't know how to calculate your profits.

Yall wanna be seen as intellectuals who "understand" more than the majority of the population and yall can't even fucking read Descartes or Shakespeare.

Yall wanna be content creators and don't know how to proofread.

One time I bought an affirmation tape that came with a pdf with all the affirmations listed. The tape itself was excellent but the pdf was riddled with errors! It makes me sad because something that can help change your life, like a sleep tape to saturate, "cheapens" in its authenticity at the price of minor errors. Sigh.

Let me tell you that 100% you can be successful in this world just by going to the end and claiming it.

BUT YOU LOSE A LOT OF TREASURE BY NOT GIVING YOURSELF THE TOOLS TO DIG FOR IT.

THERE IS SO MUCH FOUNDATIONAL INFORMATION WITHIN THESE "OLD TIMEY" TEXTS.

and if you don't like any of it and just wanna watch sammy ingram and manifest like that THEN GO AHEAD BUT DONT CLAIM TO NOT UNDERSTAND A SENTENCE AND THEN CALL IT BULLSHIT.

just be honest and own it!

be honest that you don't wanna read, that you don't wanna be academic and that's 100% okay and you're still beautiful and worth everything but

do not put down the value of what is being said just because you don't understand it

That's why I am frustrated, reader.

I am educated enough to recognize when someone's ignorance is just that - ignorance.

But I am human enough to be annoyed.

So please give yourselves some grace and take the time to appreciate knowledge. Without the knowledge of the law of assumption, we wouldn't all be here interacting with one another.

xx, gigi

p.s. for those of you who are more familiar with reading the Bible via the law of assumption lens - I beg you to think of Solomon. He was asked by God what he would like and Solomon chose wisdom over material things. Why is that? Because through wisdom comes the ability to know how to obtain all one's desires. Food for thought.

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beauty-and-passion · 1 year

Text

Eurovision 2023: more about the true winner because I said so

Hey, guess who is not over Eurovision 2023 yet.

It’s me, I am who.

I have never been so invested and still so obsessed over this year’s Eurovision. I mean, I am always hit by the post-depressive phase of Eurovision, but that lasts a couple days - during which I usually go through all the beautiful moments and listen to all the songs on repeat - then I’m back to my regular schedule of stupidly long analyses and fanfictions.

(By the way, sorry for all the Americans who follow me and have no idea of what I’m talking about or what happened in this year’s Eurovision. Just bear with me, I will come back to posting Sanders Sides stuff. Just not today)

This year... well, this year was truly something. And if the last year and the one before I was like “aww, what beautiful moments, I miss seeing these people having fun”, now it’s all mushed into one ball of feelings. I look at those artists having fun with the eyes of someone who saw how things went down. I look at them celebrating the true winner after the finale and I have this strange mix of nostalgia and heaviness.

I am not mad anymore for the result. Or better: I am and I will always be because 200 people stepped over the will of millions. But what this loss caused is just so fascinating and so unique, I want to keep exploring it - and maybe talking a little bit more about the true winner of Eurovision 2023 will help me process my feelings too.

Or I just will satisfy my need to ramble more about this incredible Finnish man, either way.

______________________

The sheer power of charisma

When you watch the entirety of Käärijä’s journey on this Youtube channel (and I suggest you do it, because it gives you a lot of food for thought), you notice a lot of interesting details.

From the moment he won the national competition and knew he had to go to Eurovision, Käärijä knew his only rival would’ve been Loreen. He said right from the start that it would’ve ended up with a confrontation between Sweden and Finland. He liked other songs and thought they could’ve been good opponents - but it’s pretty clear he knew the only one who could’ve opposed him was Sweden.

And he knew that Loreen was good. Even though I do not like her songs, even I have to admit she has good vocals. Sure, the vocals are the only thing I understand because she mumbles the rest of the song, but the vocals aren’t bad.

Käärijä knew she was the favorite to win. He praised her performance and called her “queen”, so he has been the first one to recognize her as a worthy opponent. He wasn’t so naive to think “I can easily beat her”.

However, he had some tricks up his sleeves. He knew his song was perfect for Eurovision, he basically designed it for that. He knew his performance would’ve got people’s attention. And he knew he had a lot of charisma.

You can say anything you want about him, but you cannot deny this man is charismatic. And this is a lot interesting, because charisma doesn’t have an exact definition and it’s not the same for everyone. And yet, we can all recognize and identify it as “charisma” when we see it.

The definition Wikipedia offers is that charisma is “a personal quality of presence or charm that compels its subjects”. And it’s undeniable that Käärijä has it. He has that genuine, simple honesty we see in childrens only and this activates our protective instincts, because we feel the need to protect him too. He is funny and makes us smile and everyone loves to smile and have fun. He is simple and humble and that makes him look more approachable and friendly than a superstar.

And his presence on stage is very, very good. He’s eye-catching and he knew it very well. He was the flashiest and the most interesting to look at - both because of his clothes and his appearance. Just compare him to the Cyprus guy: I don’t even remember the Cyprus guy’s face, but I doubt I will ever forget that iconic neon green bolero.

And I am sure he knew that very well. He knew the public would’ve loved him. He knew he would’ve gotten a lot of points because of the public. He knew he would’ve connected with them and not with the jury.

And so it was. The numbers are clear: he was and still is the public’s favorite. His result is the second highest in history right after Kalush Orchestra’s. The entire arena sang with him. During the voting portion, they kept calling his name. Everyone called him “winner”. As the Estonian singer Alika told him: “you had the public when they announced Loreen won”.

And by knowing that, I can understand why he was so bummed. He literally had everything: the perfect song, the charisma, public’s support. And I am pretty sure that, if the public gave more points to Loreen, he would’ve accepted his defeat easier.

But it wasn’t like that: he got more points than her in both the semifinal and the final. He has always been the public’s winner, right from the start. And even if he would've gotten the theoretical maximum of public votes from Europe (432), he still would've ended up behind Sweden.

Losing because 222 people gave your opponent an unbeatable lead isn’t something easy to digest. I mean, it’s been days and I haven’t digested it yet! And I am definitely not a singer, nor I did take part in the competition. However, I voted for him and, well, I am quite pissed that my money got wasted because of a stupid unfair system. The EBU should really refund everyone who tried to vote, considering there was no way to defeat the sheer power of the jury.

So, well, the competition ended with the public’s favorite losing the piece of glass. I will get over it, everyone will get over it. Käärijä himself will get over it - now he’s still rightfully sad about it, but as he said, life goes on.

And he will soon realize that losing the competition turned him into something more than a simple winner.

______________________

The birth of a legend

If Käärijä won, he would’ve been just the winner of Eurovision 2023. People would’ve loved him like they love Kalush Orchestra or Maneskin. Everyone would’ve been happy, a little bit of post-Eurovision depression as always and we would’ve forgotten it.

But losing had an even bigger impact, because Käärijä didn’t step down to second place, but over the first place. Being so spectacularly wronged in front of the world made him ascend to the status of legend and the public went crazy for him. Cha Cha Cha reached the top of Spotify's top 50 global, people from all European countries called him “the true winner” and I’ve seen more than one American, who knew nothing about Eurovision, watch his performance and protest for the result as well.

Even Tumblr was affected by this: the tag Eurovision trended for 3 days after its ending and, after it stopped trending, Käärijä kept doing it for days. And he’s still doing it, so good job people, let’s keep the party going on for a little longer: we all deserve it, after all. You know, as a little FUCK YOU to the jury.

What about Youtube? His grand final performance reached ca. 9 mln views in three days and if you check the comment section, is full of people calling him the true winner as well.

Heck, the Eurovision channel made a video specifically about his journey, like the usually do for winners only (in fact, they did one for Loreen. And Käärijä’s video got more views than Loreen’s in one single day).

And all over Europe people are still protesting and asking for the voting system to change. The Norway delegation asked it first and I fully support them, because they are constantly robbed by the jury. I liked Duncan Lawrence’s Arcade in 2019, but KEiiNO was a completely different level. (And if you loved KEiiNO too, please check their Youtube channel because they have made a lot of other songs and OH MY GOSH THEY ARE ALL GREAT)

Käärijä united Europe with his music and his energy and I understand why Finnish people are so proud of him: there are very few artists who are able to connect people so well. And he did it by using his mother tongue, not English! That’s an even bigger win imho, because it proves that if you have a great song, a strong performance and incredible charisma, people will appreciate you and go past the language barrier without any problem.

That’s why humankind loves music, after all: because it doesn’t need to be understood word by word, to reach people’s hearts.

______________________

The hero’s journey

There are many reasons why people fell in love with this funky green man and they all differ: someone loves his bubbly personality, others were touched by his genuinity, others just fell on the ground laughing and who doesn’t love someone that makes you laugh? And yes, there are some who are just horny for him and you are valid too, because he’s a good-looking man.

However, I think that the main reason why so many people got so invested, it’s because he had the perfect hero’s journey.

He already had a story perfect for a movie, even before starting Eurovision: when he was younger, he was diagnosed with colitis ulcerosa and the disease almost took his life (this post has an interview with all details). But because of that experience, he realized life is short and he should’ve pursued what he truly wanted - i.e. singing. I mean, this alone is perfect material for a movie already.

But now he got another story, and it’s even more like a movie: the story of the young man no one knew, who left his city in his small country, to reach the big European stage. A man with a funny spirit, who connected with everyone despite his broken English - and he wonderfully improved it along the way. Just look at how much more confident he became! Truly a masterful example of how we should just talk and make mistakes, in order to get better in another language.

So we followed the adventures of this funny man and of the friends he made along the way. We had fun and cried for the beauty of his friendship with Bojan (he literally called Käärijä “my new brother” and a small part of my heart that was broken got immediately healed). We got involved in his climbing to the top, we saw him face the behemoth that was opposing him and hoped for him to overcome it.

And he got the tragic conclusion of a hero’s journey: a hero who won and yet still lost.

People love this shit. We have always loved the story of the little one against the unbeatable enemy, the nobody who got the recognition he deserves, the kind heart defeated by the corrupt system. Those are all things that touch people and all aspects of the hero’s journey. And people naturally hope for a happy ending, so if we get a sad, bad or unfair one instead, we tend to feel even more empathetic towards the protagonist. And if your protagonist is as lovable as he is, the feeling is 100x stronger.

I really don’t know if the national juries expected this to happen, when they knew who the public’s favourite was and yet decided to award a different artist. But by doing that, they became the perfect enemy to close Käärijä’s journey and build a legend.

So, well, thanks for sucking so much. You built the legend you didn’t want to.

And yes, Käärijä’s enemy IS NOT Loreen. Loreen did her thing, she didn’t bribe the judges to give her votes. The problem is the jury’s power. So, for all the people who are still harrassing her: please stop hating this woman, she just did what other artists did too.

And since we’re talking about her, please stop saying shit like “She shouldn’t have participated!” too, because this is both very stupid (everyone is allowed to participate in Eurovision) and very disrespectful towards Käärijä himself. It’s a bit like saying that sure, he was good, but, like, you know, not enough good.

And this is totally wrong because this man has been able to defeat Loreen twice, both during the semifinal and the final (at least according to the votes that matter). So stop undermining his ability: he is a good artist. Actually, an artist so good only Loreen was able to compete against him.

And if you still think it’s right to hate Loreen for whatever reason, then I would like to bring this to your attention:

The king literally proposed to Loreen. And, considering how accurate was his foresight about the whole competition, I think it’s time we start to think about when it will happen and how many children they will have.

So if you are still harassing her: stop protesting for the piece of glass and ask her when will they get married, instead. We need to know.

Also, wouldn’t that be an even more perfect ending for Käärijä’s hero’s journey? Not only the great evil (aka the jury) will be defeated, but he will marry the only woman strong enough to oppose him. 100/10 I want a movie now.

And yes, I know Käärijä also proposed to Bojan and they are fathers of a baby sea lion. But what’s the problem? Doesn’t Käärijä have two hands? With one hand can hold Bojan, with the other Loreen, duh.

(Then he will probably need another hand for Selena from Austria, because I think she developed a little crush on him but hey, that’s the life of a hero I guess.)

______________________

Have you listened to his other songs yet?

I just want to confirm they are bops and you should listen to them immediately. Also, do not forget his concert on Saturday that will be available worldwide. Let’s show love to the king.

And yes, that means another post will come out. I mean, there are still so many things we need to know! I want to see the photos of that mural people are doing for him in Vantaa, I want to see the music collaboration between him and Bojan, I want to see them visiting little Edgar at the zoo. And I can’t wait to hear about his future European tour, because he has to do one. And maybe that will fully convey him how big his impact has been indeed.

As people told him in the after party, he conquered the world. Now he just needs to see it for himself.

#eurovision #eurovision 2023 #esc #esc 2023 #finland #jere from vantaa will go very far #good job finland #everyone loves you #and you don't even have to spend money to host the show #also you will be forever linked to the legend #just like ukraine #and that's another huge privilege #käärijä

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little-engineer-who-cant · 16 days

Text

Jason has an identity crisis, tries to fuck his way out of all his feelings and fails miserably.

Part 1 of Sirens Scream Names Forgotten by Tomorrow, Laid to Rest in Infinity

(also posted under cut)

“Be kind to the jaded souls, the ones with jagged edges and bones weary and crumbling. Be gentle with them not because you may break them to pieces with one wrong touch, not because you may cut yourself on their serrated fingers, but because the world has never known to be gentle with them. Because they have never known to be gentle with themselves.”

- don’t you think they’ve suffered enough? (j.p.)

It’s easy to slip away from that warehouse in the chaos of his own trap springing, leaving the hero and his newest child soldier with nothing but his laughter ringing in their ears. For all of Batman’s tech, his strength, his mind, there’s no way for a living and breathing man to track a phantom that doesn’t want to be found. Dead men tell no tales and all that.

(Oh, but you do.)

That part hadn’t been planned, but he’s more than a little smug about handling it as smoothly as he did. Even unprepared, there was just too much that he knew about Bruce and wasn’t that just unsettling to old Batsie?

(You wanted him to know you, didn’t you? Wanted him to see past the mask.)

(Shut up, it’s not time.)

A wrench like Bruce had a certain amount of unpredictability, that was true. Humans usually did. But to fucking show up personally for a seemingly small potatoes villain like him and not just send that little shit of a replacement Robin like he’d been anticipating… you’ve changed your game a bit, huh old man? No, he’s apparently now made just enough of a name for himself that the Bat himself wanted to talk. At least the talking part hadn't changed. Same as always, it was about the smokescreen, the show. The act of making Bruce feel better about himself, like he had tried to deescalate the situation but any violence that resulted was always someone else’s fault. Never his. They all forced his hand, you see?

(Like you’re trying to now.)

What a fucking joke , like the old man would ever say something worth hearing. Trying to be reasonable, through heavy handed threats of grievous bodily harm, how the fuck did I ever go along with that? Being a child was only so much of an excuse. He’d been old enough then to understand the words that were being thrown about, he’d just been too caught up in being the Robin to Batman that he hadn’t cared about the meanings like he does now. Being on the receiving end makes him look more closely at this warped funhouse mirror that’s become his… life? Unlife?

Whatever. The specifics of his… situation … are too complicated to parse through his feelings on those right now. Not when all he wants to do is take his now warm and living fist and slam it into Bruce’s face for having the fucking nerve to bring another child into this, like Jason meant nothing. Just the first body in a God knows how long of a line of them to come. Some kind of demented conga line of dead birds; maybe he’s more like the Joker than he wants to think he is and that thought makes him snort a bitter huff of amusement under his breath then grimace at the ache in his ribs.

(He’s a vampire bat, maybe, they feed on birds.)

(Fuck.)

That’s a whole other can of worms that he is not looking into right now. Bad enough his carcass was replaced so easily. Even worse if it was planned.

If he goes down that line of thought, he might light this whole city on fire and leave Bruce screaming in the ashes, bleeding out from a thousand cuts.

No, no, no, he’s got a plan already and that’s bleeding this city dry and watching Bruce try to desperately revive its picked over cadaver the way he never tried to revive Jason’s before he gives the old shit the mercy of a bullet-

(Maybe you’re the vampire.)

-just because that’s justice . And that’s all the Batman’s after, right? All he’s ever been after, if all the lines he fed to his Robins-

(His food-)

-could be believed.

(Chewed you up and spit you in the ground, he’ll do it again and again-)

His fist raps the alley wall a few times, enough to sting and drive back the looming cloud that threatens to swirl around and become a living typhoon. There’ll be blood under his gloves from how tight he’s clenched his fist, splitting open old wounds, but that’s fine. What’s blood loss going to do? Kill him? He’s no stranger to handling a bruise or a hundred, that’s par for the course in his life now. Has been for years. A couple cracked ribs and some bloody knuckles are not going to slow him down.

No, what really fucking stings is whatever is left in that cavity inside his chest, the hole that he used to think was patched when Bruce brought him into that huge house, when Alfred smiled and snuck him cookies.

(That was the fucking dream, wasn’t it? Warm house, warm food, then you get the shit beat out of you to go fight crime.)

Turnabout is fair play and all that nonsense.

The side of his fist finds that same brick wall but he doesn’t smash into it, just rests his gloved knuckles against the abrasive surface. No use breaking his hand for a momentary fit of rage, it won’t help anything and he needs to keep his head on straight. There’s a plan here and he hasn’t gotten this far by losing his cool. It’s just a grounding point that he presses against, one that won’t crumble no matter how hard he shoves. It’s exactly what he needs because God knows there isn’t a person he can take this out on-

(Yes there is.)

(Shut up.)

But his body turns towards his magnetic north anyways and he doesn’t stop it. It was a token protest anyways. Truth will out and all that bullshit. Well, Batman didn’t get the truth tonight but someone else will. Someone else will look this horrid amalgamation in the eye and either run or treat him just as gingerly as Talia did. Like the weapon he’d spent so long honing himself to be, the monster he’d welcomed into that place that-

That still hurts. It still hurts, in that cavity inside. The part he never thought had a chance in hell of crawling out of that hole and back into his sad sack of a meat suit. Jason Todd went into the ground a whole boy, the Red Hood emerged a warped reimagining of that little corpse, grown strong and tough and-

(And you failed.)

One day, he’d finish that fucking clown. One day, he’d dig the bastard a pit to Hell next to what used to be Jason Todd’s grave, but first, he had a bigger score to settle. In the end, in the here and now, this wasn’t about the Joker or even about Jason fucking dying. It was about Tim goddamn Drake.

Because what had changed, really? What changed? Nothing. He’s died and come back, he’s been buried and dug himself out with his fucking belt buckle and nothing changed. Not even Robin changed. Tim Drake is just another child following Bruce, spouting his words, punching the people Bruce points at and all of them, both of us, were just replacements for Dick who was a replacement for the family Bruce lost. And none of them ever lived up to it, I died trying to be that and still failed to do that right-

It’s as easy as breathing, though that’s a little painful right now, slipping up the wire-frame fire escape in the darkness. Never change, Gotham, never change. A last sweeping look over the city confirms that he’s alone. Or as alone as a log ever gets in a stacked fire pit, waiting for a match to drop. Or maybe this city’s already smoldering and he’s trying to frantically pour water on it.

(If water is gasoline maybe. Then you’d be God.)

(Shut. Up.)

His ribs ache as he slips into her apartment through a once locking window, confident no one is following him, not even the little shit in a stolen suit who’d tried so hard to get the drop on him. But the kid is just that, still a kid. Jason’s been in the game for a long time, not even Bruce knows how far his reach in Gotham goes now. This isn’t Batman’s city anymore, it’s Red Hood’s. It’s his. Bruce may fight crime, but Jason grew up embedded in it. He knows it in a way Bruce and his silver spoon never will, no matter how he studies its occupants. Because he isn’t one of them like Jason is. To a grown gutter urchin, these streets are home, their busted lights a balm to his soul, the screams of brakes and people alike a familiar lullaby. Even the muted throbbing in his face is familiar, almost a comfort of home. It’s certainly not the worst hit he’s ever taken, even discounting the obvious comparison.

Her bedroom is empty like he knew it would be. It’s Friday, she doesn’t work tomorrow and it’s not even that late. Barely past eleven. Really, he’s impressed with himself, taking an early night off. His ribs will hurt like a bitch tomorrow and his cheek might be fractured from the stupid kid’s pretty solid punch before he split, but the mask did it’s job, taking most of what might have otherwise knocked him down. And he’d left the Bat and his replacement-

(God damn you, did I ever mean anything to you besides being the means to your end?)

-frazzled and afraid. A few more steps in this grand plan and the truth would come out, the web he’d been weaving around The World’s Greatest Detective would close and there would be no way out. Either Bruce would pull the trigger, or Jason would. If you pull it old man, it might not stick. Is that what you want?

At this point he doesn’t know who he’s talking to, his imaginary Bruce or himself.

Where is she? He needs a distraction from these swirling thoughts, a way out of the growing labyrinth in his head. She’s always been that since he found her, a light in the dark, a soothing balm over an open wound. She’s not part of this world, with its shrouds and lies and agendas, she’s just a girl living her life and unfortunate enough to have found the devil on her doorstep.

Crazy enough to have let him in, despite all the warning signs.

The whisper soft humming from the dark abyss beyond the doorway echoes in his ears like a siren song, alerting him to her location and he smiles under the mask. Drawing him into her embrace again, the only comfort he had that didn’t come from watching the life leave someone’s eyes. The only warmth he felt that didn’t involve him being elbow deep in someone’s chest cavity to feel it, didn’t need a slit artery or have a-

(bomb as my pyre, feeling flesh melt, unable to move, unable to scream-)

-match burning down to his fingertips just to feel something other than apathy and bone melting rage.

He watches her from the doorway, silent and shadowed. There’s no moon tonight, no star bright enough to turn on him and expose his presence or even grace him with a shadow of his own. No streetlights. She’s an office worker, not a millionaire, so she’s not in the part of the city where they keep replacing those when they inevitably get shot out. But the shirt she’s wearing is light grey, mine, she’s wearing my… Jason’s shirt, and the walking shell of Jason Todd isn’t the one who watches it float around the room like a ghost, flickering at the hem in time with the movement of her legs, the back vanishing and reappearing in time with the swinging of her loose braid.

Blue light washes over her face, staining her lips as she clicks on the kettle. It takes every ounce of his considerable self control not to stalk over, not to press his fingers, mouth, entire being against those lips to make sure they’re warm with life and breath, not washed out and cold like a corpse. He’s seen too many, he’s made even more-

(you’ve been one too, don’t you remember what it was like trying to move those stiff limbs? It took you hours to feel again, trapped in that box-)

-and if there is one certainty in life it’s that if she keeps welcoming into her sanctuary, she’ll be another one to add to the list of his sins. His hands aren’t clean and she isn’t safe. This was a mistake, he should not have come here, he should have done what he usually does. Rampage around another supervillain or five for old times sake. Grit his teeth and put his shoulder back to the grindstone to burrow his way deeper into Gotham’s underworld, chiseling away at the Batman’s iron grip until he replaces it with his titanium one instead. But no, he’s an idiot . So, he’s here, in her apartment in the dead of night, uninvited.

Jason Todd, the shy and uncomfortable man she met at a fun little nightclub, is not watching her.

The Red Hood, Gotham’s latest war dog, is.

(Is he?)

Sometimes, he wonders if there’s a difference anymore but it doesn’t matter right now. Not when they both want her. Because they’re both me but who the fuck is that anymore? Jason’s dead, the Red Hood is Joker’s, what am I?

She notices him, of course she does. She’s too perceptive not too. Sometimes, he wonders what happened to make her that way, wants to ask about the small, oddly scattered scars like knife wounds-

(too similar to yours)

-that dot her body, but she doesn’t ask about his disappearances, his odd hours, the blood and death that have burrowed so deep into him that they’re practically lovers, so he keeps his mouth shut. Her secrets are her own, God knows he has plenty. Whatever has happened to her, it’s tuned her into the smallest shifts in her carefully created atmosphere, her protective bubble, her sanctuary. She notices him and there’s no telling what gave him away. The ragged breathing behind his mask, the soft creak of leather when his fists clenched, some other presence that he can feel clinging to him like a second skin and dripping from his lips like blood as he pants-

It’s a phantom, given life by his every exhale, moving in a disjointed and phony copy of his own limbs, but it’s his and his alone. Rage made manifest, always closer on nights like these, ones where the acrid scents of smoke and gunpowder and iron cling to him even after a shower, like it's an expensive cologne and he wonders how she hasn’t guessed the truth. Or maybe she has. She’s smart, too smart, too perceptive not to.

(Then why doesn’t she run from me?)

Robin would have been good for her to find. Even an older, jaded, more independent Robin like Dick would have been better. But no, she’d picked the worst possible one, the skeletal remains of a bird too young to fly before it was launched from the nest to fall, to struggle, to die. There was no feasible way she could have known, sidling up to him and flashing him that smile, ignoring every warning sign with the single minded determination of a self-destructive spiral, but shouldn’t she have seen? Seen the blood under his fingernails-

(they’re clean, you wear gloves)

-seen the fangs in his mouth-

(they’re normal teeth)

-heard the growl in his voice that screamed run, run, run-

(Why didn’t you run?)

No, she’d looked into the lion’s mouth and smiled without fear, run delicate fingers through his mane, put her number in his phone and yanked him into her addictive embrace. She should have found Robin and maybe she’d find that little brat one day but right now she has a nightmare made flesh in her kitchen.

His hand flexes, wrapped around the butt of the gun holstered on his thigh like it’s a child’s comfort toy, not a deadly mechanism of destruction that he could so easily turn on her. Never, I never will . If a bullet kills her, it won’t be his, even if it’s because of him the trigger is pulled. Small comforts. The other fist clenches harder at the bitter thought, like the pressure will stop him from doing something even stupider than standing here. Like he can stop himself from reaching out, a demon to an angel, falling further over his abyss of damnation to reach her divine light.

So she notices. So she turns, so she sees. Sees him, towering in the shadows like he wants to melt into them. Sees the red covering his jaw and mouth and nose and cheeks, the black covering his eyes, the hood above all that. Sees the kevlar, the weapons, the gloves, the rage pulsing from his skin like a living being. Sees the truth of the man she’s been letting into her life and into her bed, a reaper come to take his due, coming here was a mistake-

He sees the truth on her face, the flicker of comprehension and complex emotion that cannot be anything but fear . Hears it, in the way her breath catches on an inhale that sounds like a gunshot between them, her to him, echoing over the actual gunshots outside. This was a mistake, you’ve fucked up-

Then, she’s slowly stepping toward him, like he’s an animal she’s trying not to spook. You’ve fucked up, Todd . This nice, kind, normal girl who was somehow able to see whatever shell of Jason was left under all of his Red Hood bravado, now being confronted with the truth that they are one in the same and something else entirely and fuck, he’s just fucked this whole thing up, isn’t that what you wanted? You knew she would never be safe-

If she runs, he won’t blame her even one bit. He’ll let her go, even though she threatens his whole plan because she knows now. But the memories of her fingers twisted with his as she dragged Jason Todd along a park path, joy in her eyes and laughter on her lips even when he stumbled… He’ll let her go. His hands are weapons that Bruce shaped long ago, people always choose to avoid him instead of crossing his path but she’s headstrong in her lack of fear. He’s a man to her, nothing more, and even if she runs from the devil, he’ll let her escape this one time just for that kindness.

She doesn’t run.

She also doesn’t take his hand.

She doesn’t touch him at all.

No, Anna kneels in front of him, eyes not wavering from his face even as her mouth is level with his groin. Jason doesn’t dare breathe, what the fuck is she doing and she doesn’t break eye contact as she opens her mouth and presses a filthy kiss to the front of his pants, tongue dragging up his inseam to mouth at his belt buckle as she looks up at him and blinks once, a question.

There’s a breathless beat where she stares up at him and Jason does his best to play off his surprise as stretching the moment like he’s considering her offer, like he wouldn’t die a thousand deaths to take her up on it.

(She didn’t run. Take what you can get.)

The syrup slow moment passes as he follows her desire into whatever abyss this is. This is why he came here, to forget. And it’s so, so easy to forget when she’s smiling at him.

Anything else can come later.

—

He wakes up the next morning sore . Both from the strain of fighting those who he doesn’t want to fucking think about right now and the intensity of his worst, or maybe smartest, spur of the moment decision that followed.

“Shit,” he breathes, watching his breath puff out in the chilly air. Her heat isn’t working again, fucking cheap-ass landlord . He rolls onto his back, flinging an arm over his eyes to stop the assault of the full daytime outside, taking a deep breath.

Last night was a line that he crossed at full fucking sprint, he should not have come here in full Red Hood costume after a confrontation with Batman and his replacement-

Jason takes a slow, calming breath. Rage and panic won’t help anything, it’ll just cloud his judgment. And he’s already clouded enough because he came here last night instead of running to ground in a safe house like he absolutely should have . It doesn’t matter that he lost any potential of a tail, that he was clear of trackers, he had promised himself that first night that he would not get Anna mixed up in this. She’s a good, nice girl and has no business being close to him but he’s fucking pathetic and she cares about him and he’s drawn to her sweetness like a moth to flame. Knowing it’s going to burn him but doing it anyway.

There’s a part of him that knows she’s known something this whole time. He’s subtle but she’s smart. And now he’s blown the whole charade, breaking into her apartment at ass o’clock at night in full Red Hood regalia… god damn it, Todd. One person who cared about whatever’s left of you . It was a mistake, she’ll see that in the light of day. The bravery the dark gave her will fade. She’s a practical woman, she’ll know it’s too dangerous to let him stay.

But he’s a grown ass man who has to face the music he wrote, he can’t wallow in her bed forever. All his clothes, and his fucking mask God damn it all, are strewn in the other rooms. His dick twitches at the memory and he hates himself a little, mind-blowing sex does not make what you did okay, own up to it and face her like a man. So he takes a deep breath, pulls his arm away from his face and looks at the empty side of the bed. She’s probably been up for a while now. Rises with the sun and doesn’t even think of stopping her movements until after it sinks. Maybe she’ll give me a secret for a secret?

But that’s a hypocrite talking. Just because he busted into her apartment and basically handed her his head on a silver platter does not mean she’s going to do the same. And if she came to hide out in Gotham of all places…

If he digs, it won’t be hard to find out. But where will he be then? What good would it do? No, this is fine.

She’s Anna, that’s all that matters.

He’s… someone, but in her bed and in her life, he feels a bit closer to human. Maybe not Jason Todd, maybe never again, but… closer to the dream of it that almost feels like a memory on the good days.

He sighs, then stands up, rubbing a hand over the scruff on his jaw, mumbling to himself about needing to shave, then goes over to ‘his’ drawer in her dresser, the one where she keeps all the clothes she’s stolen from him over the months they’ve been… whatever they are. Whatever you can be when you’ve been lying to her, you bastard. Can’t be a relationship, that’s for fucking sure.

Maybe it can be.

Fed up with his own internal monologue, the very thing he came here to escape, he pulls out a pair of sweatpants and yanks them on, then runs a hand through his hair and looks in the mirror. Tired, he looks tired. Bruises on his ribs and scrapes on his arms, the beginnings of a shiner on one cheekbone from the little prick, a few hickeys scattered along his throat and collarbones. Stop stalling, he glares at his own reflection, then turns on his heel and stalks towards the bedroom door, opening it and stepping into the apartment before he loses what little nerve he has left. The King of Gotham, brought to his knees by a slip of a girl whose smile could melt ice in a snowstorm. Christ, Todd, what’ve you come to?

She’s in the kitchen again, her kettle heating up for morning tea. His heart aches as he leans in the doorway, folding his arms and watching the way his shirt rides up her thighs as she walks, a slight hitch in her step, the way her braid can’t cover all the marks he left on her throat last night, the way she stirs honey into her tea, a sure sign that her throat is raw from- He breathes through his nose to banish the image before he pops a completely inappropriate boner.

Instead he refocuses on how the sunlight catches the colors in her lovely hair, highlighting the lighter brown streaks hidden away in the dark color and showing that it is, in fact, brown and not black. A deep chocolate color that makes him think of syrup or rich, dark wood of expensive furniture that no one wants to ruin. She’s beautiful, humming to herself and smiling as she takes a sip of this still-too-hot tea like she always does, hissing a bit but then making a small noise of satisfaction that it’s just right. Taking the tea bag out and disposing of it, turning around with a bright smile and-

“Hey,” she says, still smiling, eyes still shining and crinkling in the corners in genuine delight, her voice a little raspy, “morning sleepyhead.”

“Morning,” he rumbles out, arms still crossed, waiting for her to tell him to get the hell out before he drags her into his complicated mess of a life-

She holds out a hand, sipping her tea again. “Come’ere.”

He stares at the extended hand, glances over to the open area where her living room is. He sees his Red Hood suit, carefully folded and placed on the coffee table, his mask resting on top. Bold and open in the broad daylight, not hidden away or uncomfortably left untouched. Cared for.

He looks back at her and her open smile, her quiet, understanding eyes, still crinkled at the edges, happy. Slowly, he straightens, unfolds his arms, waits for her hand to draw away, for her to flinch.

She doesn’t. He takes her hand and steps into her sunlight with a smile, with something in his chest that might be the memory of hope.

(Neither of them see their shadows lurking in the corners, looming larger than them, just as entwined. How hers looms over his in the bright rays they bask in, the darkness swallowing the sun. Just as hungry.

He may be the Red Hood, but Silena is a wolf.)

#jason todd #bruce wayne #tim drake #batman #my writing #ao3 link #as this series is rapidly approaching it's conclusion I've now decided to start posting it here too

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pepperochau · 8 months

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hello everyone and good afternoon, my name is pepperochau and i am here to talk to you today about the one, the only, the futher mucker itself: dudunsparce. this will be a bit of the read, so follow the cut to see the rest!

majestic, is it not? personally i was not the biggest fan when it was revealed, but it has grown on me since then.

now, there is at current a very strong, loud refrain in the pokemon fandom that dudunsparce is a joke, and was always meant to be a joke. they say "people have wanted an epic dragon evolution for twenty years, and gamefreak has trolled them"; "dudunsparce is supposed to be a bad/lame/dumb design because it's a joke".

however! i disagree. i have been a lifelong fan of dunsparce, ever since i was a young malformed guttersnipe who thought it was a mythical pokemon, and i can safely say i've never wanted it to become a dragon. however, i also have never viewed it as a joke pokemon. so to hear people write off the design of dudunsparce as simply "a joke" has frustrated me to no end. so to you, reader, i would like to provide an explanation for why dudunsparce is what it is—a mess.

so, let's start at the beginning of the line with dunsparce.

many people will look at dunsparce's name and their mind immediately goes to dunce, sparce. and, fair enough, as it does look a bit dopey doesn't it? Other languages also give it names meaning "dumb" or "oafish" like the German Dummisel and the French Isolourdo respectively. now, I cant speak on how strong brand consistency was back in Gen 2, so maybe they were just aping off the same perception most English speakers had of the name. or it is possible that TPCi had always intended this interpretation. who is to say.

but there is a more obvious, widely overlooked aspect of its name: Dun. as in a subadult version of an insect, traditionally used when describing mayflies.

IN FACT this is such an underacknowledged aspect of its name that even on Bulbapedia, one of the most important secondary sources of information on pokemon next to serebii, i was hard pressed to find any mention of it at any point earlier than 2022, in an article revision that SIMILARLY went unnoted and uncommented on.

future editions of this article maintain both definitions of the word "dun".

but with this aspect of its name in mind, you'll notice that the rather un-tsuchinoko-like aspects of its design become more coherent, like its near-useless bug wings and stripey back. because its not just a snake with a fat tummy, but a fat bumblebee as well! wow!!! so cool!!!!!

now that this preamble is out of the way, we can finally move onto the mon of the hour: dudunsparce

pokedex entries for dudunsparce's 3-segment form mention that "the number of segments a Dudunsparce’s body has is determined by the Pokémon’s genes." at first glance it feels like a bit of a lore cop out for a formchange with no effect on gameplay. but remember how dunsparce has some partial insect inspiration? with this in mind, dudunsparce reveals itself to be, first and foremost, a reference to the Drosophila fruit fly's bithorax mutation:

as you can see, sometimes the genes for the termination of the thorax are copied accidentally, resulting in a copied thorax in the afflicted insect! and with "dun" meaning a subadult insect, we can reconceptualize dudunsparce from a simple joke, to a pokemon species whose inherent genetic mutations have kept it from reaching its true adult form! it even has the stripey butt that a fruit fly has!! so cool!!! a bit sad though, don't you think?

but there are still yet unexplored depths to the design of dudunsparce. for example: why does dudunsparce have a two-layered drill tail? why is there a random spiral on its first segment? well, allow me to introduce you to yet another muckerfuther: the cuélebre.

now i know what you may be thinking: this looks nothing like dudunsparce. and certainly, the resemblance is minimal. but allow me to share with you some mythological information about the cuélebre:

The cuélebre is a multi-winged serpent from Cantabrian and Asturian folklore, both of which are regions of modern-day spain.

The cuélebre's impervious scales grow thicker with age

The cuelebre's only weak spot is its throat

The cuelebre lives in deep caves

The cuelebre retreats to Mar Cuajada in old age, a place with diamonds covering the bottom

sound familiar? it should, because you will notice that dudunsparce mirrors all of these traits almost to a T:

Paldea is based on Spain, and Dudunsparce is a fat snake with multiple wings; or, a winged serpent.

Dudunsparce has much bulkier defensive stats than its preevolution Dunsparce (125/80/75 compared to 100/70/65), and has an extra hard "cap" layer on its tail

There is a seemingly random spiral pattern on the underside of Dudunsparce's first segment, or on its throat, regardless of form

Dudunsparce is mentioned by the pokedex to make sprawling nests in the bedrock, and is only find in the wild in Area Zero

The lowest point of Area Zero is covered in large, diamantine crystals

and for the people who still want dudunsparce to be a "joke": the cuélebre isn't even a very impressive dragon in itself: it hoards treasure and fairy women, and if you encounter it on the night of Midsummer, then you can kill it by tricking it into eating a bread or cake that's full of pins or hot irons. the worst thing it does in folklore that i can find is that it floods a town once because they weren't able to give it its daily cow head. the cuélebre is a nuisance first, and a (sort of) dragon second.

now, i don't want to be raining on people's fun, so i'll take a moment to take my lumps: i wasn't able to find very much information on the cuélebre, so there's a strong chance i am misrepresenting the creature here. aso, people are allowed to view dudunsparce as just a joke pokemon, and to like it as sich, and that's fine! i'm not here to tell you how to engage with your hobbies!

but, when i see that being the only reason that people give for liking the design? when i see that being given as the only reason given for why it looks the way it does? when i see pokemon videos on youtube that quickly bring up and then dismiss dudunsparce as a joke as if that was the only reason behind its design at all, without any kind of additional explanation or exploration of the design? it gets a bit frustrating, and tiresome. i mean hell, i maybe spent about three hours total in researching for this post, and i can confidently say that's far more time than all poketubers have spent on it combined.

the short of it os, that there is always more to be uncovered with fictional material. even with something so seemingly simple as a fat, goofy snake.

#pokemon #pokémon #pokemon scarlet and violet #pokémon scarlet and violet #pokemon scarvio #pokémon scarvio #dunsparce #dudunsparce #theorycrafting #pokemon explained #oh fat bumblebee snake how i love you so #insects #bugs

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haru-chi · 1 month

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Reading the 5th vol of 7th time loop LN .. still on chapter 2 but I gotta say ...

The way both Rishe and Arnold is like "I don't care what anyone says about me but I won't allow them to cross the line nor say something bad about you" then get angry and defensive for their sake is just killing me you had no idea 😭🩵

It has such depth to it that I wanna dig up ugh .. it also reflect both their life and personality or the way they led their life till this point ....

What I mean is ... it's kinda painful and tragic that both of them don't care much about their self-value although showing in different ways/meaning .. that it stems from different circumstances yet the end result is the same ...

Having someone be angry for you and show they actually see the real you is ... liberating .. that everything you did till this point wasn't for nothing .. that you can be you .. the real you and that's okay .. having that one person is enough for you ... that's what it meant for Rishe this kind of action ..

While to Arnold it'll have a different meaning .. he himself will never see any kind of value in himself other than bringing misfortunate maybe, he doesn't even believe he's a kind person ... even his kindness to Rishe serve a purpose to him nothing more or less ... but even so, it's still a real kindness no matter how tainted it is .. he need to realize that deep down he actually kind despite how twisted or tainted he actually is .. his kindness is still alive in him ... Rishe gonna show it to him before anyone else ... she'll let it bloom to show its true self for sure one day ... he believe the bad things people says about him ... he himself also led them to believe most of it ... maybe also deceiving himself before those which led him to actually believe that it's the real him ..

So Rishe standing up to him .. not allowing anyone to badmouth him is just ... nothing he ever experienced that he doesn't know how to feel or react about it ... maybe even feel guilty toward it ..

While I believe Rishe is confident in herself and love herself more than anyone else thanks to all her past lives ... in her first is where she went through that self-worth depression when she thought her life has ended when that idiot prince broke their engagement .. that's why current Rishe won't be that shaken with whatever anyone else says about her. She moved on from all of that.

But Arnold doesn't have that mentality toward himself, he really doesn't see any self-worth in himself. The way he doesn't care about what anyone said about him is because part of it he believe it himself, the other he don't see himself as a good or kind person and to him he doesn't worth anything. The last one is that he truly doesn't care about anyone's opinion of him. He doesn't wanna bother.

So having Rishe defend his image has shaken him differently ...

While Rishe broke her shackles long ago thanks to all her past lives, Arnold is still shackled and not free as she is ...

Ummm ... I feel I went rambling without sorting all my feelings or thoughts, so if I make no sense don't mind me. Also I'm still reading through this but I couldn't contain my emotions or thoughts and had to write it down somewhere (maybe reading on either gonna change my view or confirm it too)

But anyway, I'm in pain, in love, and screaming and I'm still in the start of this vol that I don't know if I'll handle more going forward .. they're killing me 😭🩵

#7th time loop #rishe irmgard weitzner #arnold hein #rishe x arnold #7th time loop the villainess enjoys a carefree life married to her worst enemy #I was planning to only write the first paragraph but then .... I went on and on ...#my thoughts also are over the place and hadn't sort them out ....#it just this had a depth I wanted to convey even for a bit ...#I feel I have more to say but my thoughts aren't sorted at all ...#my feelings and emotions are everywhere too ....#but I hope I conveyed my idea and thoughts in a way that make sense and logical ...#need to take a breath before I return to read .... even though I don't wanna read for it to finish fast ugh

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numinously-yours · 3 months

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What to leave behind and what to bring into the new month

Happy last week of January! Pick a group for insights on what you should leave behind as the month ends and what you can focus on in the new month ahead. Let me know if you have any topics you'd like me to pull for!

My dear pile one,

It is time to let go of your need to do everything on your own. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or weighed down by your responsibilities – or what you think is your responsibility – try remembering that you’re not alone and there are people here to help carry the load. Allow others to help, even in small ways.

Personal growth and development may be a great focus point for you in the upcoming month. The Magician brings forth the tools and energy you need to make progress in this personal journey. Focus on your “why” and look inward at your power. This period of growth will last you throughout (and beyond) the month, so don’t get hard on yourself if you don’t see immediate results. Growth is not linear.

Hello lovely twos,

Rather than the Tower representing a destruction that has already happened/is currently happening, I think you’re being told to leave January with a bang (semi-literally), and create the destruction of your self-limiting beliefs. Light up some sticks of dynamite, rev up the bulldozer, or get that wrecking ball swinging cause we’re not going into the new month with any of our same thoughts. Your self-limiting beliefs have felt like a chaos storm in your brain, and this is your permission to let them go.

February is a month of self-exploration. It is a month to figure out why these self-limiting beliefs exist. This may be a good time to do some shadow work. Shadow work is tough, but I think some good realizations can come out of it. Here are some shadow work prompts if you’re ready to get started. You may find truths you didn’t know existed. Or you may find yourself answering just as you’d expect, but this time… it’s gonna hit different. You’re going to find answers for yourself which will put a lot into perspective and really help with letting go of your self-doubt.

For those who aren’t ready to dive deep into the darker parts of your soul (which is A-OK!), take a look at the resources at your fingertips. How can you align these resources with your goals? For example, do you have a goal to say nicer things to yourself each day? Make yourself a daily check list – add some normal items like “1 hour with no screen time” or “brush your teeth” and then add “say one good thing about yourself”. As you check of the easier items, you’ll see the tougher ones. And in an effort to make those check marks, you’ll get in the groove of participating in the hard tasks.

My pile three friends,

Teamwork and collaboration seems to have been a theme in January. Whether it be your new years resolution, a project at work, or homing in on a new habit, the foundation was set in this last month. I wouldn’t say you’re really leaving anything behind, but the creation stage is ending. You are moving forward into the stabilization and growth phases of this beautiful thing you’ve launched.

Bring this sense of accomplishment into February with you to start the month off strong. You’ve done really great work! One great way to keep momentum is a partnership between your higher self and the work you are doing. As you continue to build on the project you started think: what can I get out of this project personally and what can I bring to this project to ensure it thrives. You will feel better about the end results knowing that it made your heart happy and that you had something to do with its success.

To my pile fours,

You know what your higher self is trying to tell you. You know what your guides are hinting at. Maybe it seems too good to be true or it’s scary, but either way, you gotta get rid of the clouds you’re using as a way to doubt yourself. I know from experience that self-doubt speaks LOUD. It is MEAN. But it is soo worth getting past. It doesn’t mean it’ll go away for forever, but it sure can get quieter.

In this situation, “clarity” can be seen as the opposite of “cloudy” , and mental clarity is exactly what the King of Swords wants you to bring into/work on in the new month. You may not be ready to jump right into this new thing in February, but you can do the work this month to feel more confident when the time officially comes. Lay out the facts for yourself: I have done hard things in the past; I have the resources I need to be successful; I have people I know will support me when it gets difficult. And repeat these facts to yourself as much as you need to. As with pile two, you could do some shadow work to bring clarity to why you feel this hesitancy to move forward.

#new month new goals #bye bye january #hello february #tarot reading #tarot #pick a card #ten of wands #wheel of fortune tarot #eight of pentacles #the magician tarot #the tower tarot #eight of wands #justice tarot #three of pentacles #the world tarot #queen of cups #ace of swords #judgement tarot #king of swords

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shoechoewarriors · 8 months

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I just finished reading Johnny the Homicidal Maniac by Jhonen Vasquez. To be honest, I didn't really know what to expect going in- all I've ever heard about it was from people going "Can you believe Nickelodeon asked a guy who makes stuff like that to make a children's show!?" After reading it, I can say that it's definitely interesting in a way I don't think any basic plot description could've fully prepared me for, and I kind of want to dump my thoughts about it as I just come away from it.

As the title would suggest, its most noticeable surface-level feature is that there is a lot of gore. It gets about as brutal and graphic as it can with its cartoony art style- I was actually a little bothered by it a couple of times. There are a lot of things reminiscent of Invader ZIM beyond its art style- it shares a lot of the same humor, its randomness (often to the point of stupidity), and the chaotic nature of the story progression. (There are also two aliens that show up in a few pages that I'm pretty sure are the same aliens that appeared in the IZ episode Abducted, which would mean that ZIM and JTHM take place in the same universe...? Interesting.) In a lot of ways, it had the same energy as ZIM, but lacking the restraints of a children's network- admittedly, it was very fun and tickled the twelve-year-old ZIM fan part of my brain.

The story itself is a bit trippy and somewhat disjointed. There are lots of times where Johnny will go on long monologues about how he sees himself and the world (alongside blocks of text at the beginning and end of each issue from Jhonen himself). The actual story is cut up in-between little unrelated comics of various characters getting slaughtered and mutilated in some way, facing their inner turmoils and making other people miserable, or yelling incoherent word salads and then getting murdered. You are often left unsure as to whether some of the story's events were really happening or just Johnny dreaming or making things up. It also gets kind of cosmic horror-ish at one point, but that proceeds to end itself somewhat abruptly.

I haven't looked at any discussion of the comic and what it's *really* about yet, but my first impression coming out of it is that it's... a lot of things, really? It's a nihilistic black comedy, but I got the feeling that it was also somewhat of a vent story- A lot of JTHM is dark humor and absurd scenarios for the sake of societal criticism and expressing frustration with the world. It brings up a lot of ideas about what the "nature" of humanity is, if there is a caring God, the good and bad of living, and ultimately, what the true "evils" of society are and what causes them- all told through the eyes of a weird morally bankrupt loner that likes torturing and murdering people he doesn't like.

Most of the people that Johnny goes after are assholes and bullies, generally bad people, or anyone that just generally upsets or inconveniences him in day-to-day life. His arc throughout the story is discovering who and what "controls" him in his search for true freedom- and through that, he realizes that he, himself, is a massive contributor to why everything is so awful, eventually seeing people like himself as one of society's issues (but not really doing anything to change or control his behavior, which, to me, suggested he really never attained the "freedom" he desired so much). It was quite interesting to have a main character like that.

And, while I do not really know anything about Jhonen Vasquez as a person, a good amount of Johnny's traits struck me as... maybe a bit of a projection? A lot of the blocks of text from Vasquez at the start of issues will have him describe his thoughts and behaviors, and then in the story, Johnny displays a lot of those same thoughts and behaviors, like his hatred of sleep resulting in him regularly staying up the entire night and his tendency to experience loneliness and sadness (though, of course, these blocks of text might also be Jhonen simply putting up a persona as well.) Still, though, I wouldn't be too surprised if a lot of things about Johnny were in fact an exaggerated depiction of the author's own perceived negative traits and turned into an edgy serial killer character (especially since I know that this is indeed the case for a lot of Vasquez's characters, like ZIM in his inability to realize when his ideas won't work and Dib in his undying need to prove himself above all else in IZ.)

JTHM was one of the most unique things I've read in a while- it's one of those stories that sticks in your brain and leaves an uneasy feeling in you when you come away from it, but it definitely has a lot of substance to it beyond the "edgelord serial killer gorefest" surface-level appearance. It doesn't give you any moments of comfort in its overt negativity, but I think it manages to come out as something meaningful beyond just a nihilist "everything is awful and there's nothing you can do about it" message. It's definitely not for everyone, but if you're up for it, I'd really recommend giving it a shot.

#rambles #shoe talks a lot #johnny the homicidal maniac #jthm #i hope none of this sounds too dumb to someone who knows more about the inner-workings of jthm than i do

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