#so i'm curious to see what the actual data says
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Hey wyvern friends! I have a question for you!
#my wyvern kintype walks on just the hind legs#but most of the others i see are quadrupedal on the ground#so i'm curious to see what the actual data says#please humor me#otherkin#otherkin discussion#otherkin community#dragonkin#dragonkin discussion#actuallydraconic#poll
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crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.
i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.
in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.
i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.
i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.
plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.
the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.
we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.
i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.
a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.
today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.
loved beyond thinking.
#spilled ink#writeblr#personal#please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it#i really try not to write so specifically about it#bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child#i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years#i might delete this. feels big.#the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum#and if u say ur autistic#inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms#please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do#and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort.#but it still feels like...#when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing.#they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly?#and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find#the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go)#and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW."#''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.''#and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic#someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.
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An unexpected role | cl16
Summary: You revealed your little secret to your date, you didn't expect he would take it so well.
Warning: fluffy Charles, step dad!Charles, some tears while storytelling.
a/n: This is a little long story, but I hope you like it! Let me know in the comments if you'd like a part two of this. Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
You never thought you'd go back to dating after the way your last relationship ended, which wasn't in a pleasant way... But here you were, in a coffee shop with a guy who was a known friend to your bestie, Lola, what seemed strange to you is that you never heard her talk about him... And obviously she hardly talked about him, since he is a racing driver.
To your surprise the date was going very well, you seemed to be in a fairy tale or something similar, you had a good feeling in your chest and it had been a long time since you had felt that way with someone.
“But I'm done talking about myself... Tell me more about yourself” He said while giving you a little smile, he told you about his races and that seemed very interesting to you, you used to be a Formula One fan when you were a little girl you watched the races with your father.
You let out a small sigh. "About me? I don't know what you would like to know about me, I don't think I have a very interesting life compared to yours.”
He denied while smiling. “You can tell me anything about yourself and I will find it very interesting.”
As if by fate, your cell phone, which was on the table, turned on showing a message from Lola, she was taking care of your little two-year-old girl Lily. The message said: “She just wanted to send her mama some kisses 😘” maybe she sent you a gif of your little daughter blowing kisses at the camera... You smiled a little when you saw the notification, what you didn't realize was the look of a certain green-eyed Monegasque who was also looking at the screen with curiosity.
“Um... Tell me you didn't see my screen, did you?” you said a little fearfully.
“I'll just tell you that I saw what was necessary... But now I am curious to know who that person is who sent you kisses” He tilted his head a little. “Do you have someone waiting for you at home?”
You took a breath, this wasn't the way you wanted him to know. “Actually... Yes, I have a little person waiting for me at home.”
You took courage and spoke again. “This wasn’t the way I wanted to tell you this, but,” you said with trembling hands. “I'm a single mom.”
You narrowed your eyes, expecting the worst possible reaction, perhaps he would get up from the table and leave without wanting to know more about you for the rest of his life, but you didn't expect his hand to rest on yours in a gesture that filled your heart.
“Wow... That's unexpected, but... Wow, I don't know what to say.” He said while giving you a loving look. “I don't want to sound nosy but you do have an interesting life.”
“Yes, well, dealing with a two-year-old little girl is not easy at all... But I wouldn't change it for anything.”
“Tell me about her… About you two actually.”
Just saying those words was enough to turn you into a first-rate chatterbox, you told him everything about you and Lily, the rollercoaster of emotions with pregnancy, the appointments to the gynecologist, the day she was born and so on, you practically spat out all the information there was and could be about the two of you. But his look of adoration and care did not leave his face, he listened attentively to every word you said to him, it was as if he were collecting data for the future? You didn't know exactly.
“Oh wow, that's totally amazing.” He said while having a small smile on his face. “I noticed you didn't mention her father, did something happen between you? If you don't want to answer, that's fine! I understand, there's no problem at all.”
You sighed again, there were few people who knew what happened between you and your ex, maybe telling him won't hurt.
“Well... He abandoned me when I told him I was pregnant, our relationship lasted almost two years, but when I told him the news, he left but without leaving me a nice little gift, a good blow on the cheek.” You said while chuckled. “And on top of that, my family didn't take the news very well either, they told me such hurtful things that made me feel unprotected and hurt by the people I least expected.” You said as you sobbed a little. “But hey, these are things that happen, right?” You said as you dried a few tears with your hand, but they kept coming, one of his hands rested on your face to dry your tears with his thumb and you smiled weakly.
“Oh God, I'm very sorry, I didn't imagine such a thing would have happened to you... But you are very brave and it shows, well, from what you tell me, that you do what is best for your little Lily." He said and your eyes crystalized again, you wanted to hug him, nobody had never said those beautiful words to you.
“Thank you Charles... I have never been told anything as nice as that.” You whispered.
“It's nothing, pretty. Now you will hear them more often.” He smiled as he winked and you giggled, apparently this date is going to lead to something very precious.
-
“Honey, stay calm baby, mama is trying to comb your hair.” You said as you tried to make Lily's pigtails, but she was a little restless today, excited perhaps.
You had been talking to Charles after that date, and now two weeks after that he is going to meet little Lily, he is taking you both to an ice cream parlor. You had been sending him pictures of her and so on, you talked about everything and at the same time about nothing, it was like an instant connection and that for you was fascinating, considering that he didn't run away from you when you told him everything you experienced with your daughter.
The sound of your apartment's doorbell distracted you, luckily you managed to do your little girl's hair in time.
“Let's see who's waiting for us at the door, little princess.” You said and took her hand, when you opened the door Charles was there with a shy smile and in his hands he had a bouquet of daisies and a little bag.
“Hi cutie” He said with some tenderness and smiled. “Uhm... These are for you... I saw them and I remembered you, I don't know why, maybe because they are pretty like you.” He smiled and extended the bouquet of daisies to you.
“You didn't have to do it Charles," You said as you placed them in a vase of water. “My love, meet a friend, his name is Charles… Say hello darling.” You said to Lily, who was hiding behind your legs.
“H..hi!” Lily stammered, she talks a little, although sometimes she tends to be a non-stop chatterbox, but she's adorable.
“But it's the popular Lily! Your mama has told me a lot about you.” He said with a smile as he crouched down to be level with her. “Look, I brought you something.” He said as he took out a bunny stuffed animal from the bag, Lily's eyes lit up at the presence of the stuffed animal.
“Bunny!” She said as she stretched out her little hands towards the little stuffed animal and took it from Charles's hands.
“How do you say, honey?” You emphasized.
“Thank... You” She said while babbling between laughs, Charles gave her a little smile and a small kiss on her forehead, you can swear that when you saw that your heart melted completely.
“It's nothing little princess!” He said as he looked at you and smiled. “Okay, shall we go? Those ice creams are waiting for us!” He said in an animated tone earning a small jump from Lily. If this were a competition, he would already be ahead by a long shot.
-
After going for ice cream and going to the park for a while, sleep began to take over Lily, both you and she had spent a very fun day with Charles, it's been a long time since you had such a good time, with her you always do your best to do something fun between the two of you.
“Mama... Swleep” She said adorably as she snuggled up next to you.
“Don't worry little one, Charlie is going to take us home, you will soon be sleeping comfortably in your bed." You said as you smiled at your little girl, you turned your head and saw the green-eyed boy smiling as he took your hand.
Sooner than expected you found yourself at the door of your building while trying to lift Lily out of the car.
“Leave it to me, I’ll help you with Lily.” He said and he carefully took Lily from your arms and carried her against his shoulder.
You noticed how natural the scene was and how incredibly comfortable Lily was in his arms, you smiled. Only Lola did those things to help you get out of somewhere with Lily, but seeing him with her in his arms gave you a feeling of familiarity in your chest.
You entered the building and took the elevator until you reached your apartment, when you entered he gave you Lily again and you took her to her room to put her pajamas on, he looked at you tenderly from the door frame, it's incredible how he won Lily's affection so quickly.
“You are ready to dream, little miss!” You said as you placed kisses on her face and she giggled while holding the stuffed bunny that Charles had given her earlier.
“Chas! Chas! Bed!” She said a little enthusiastically towards Charles, your time to tell her a story was approaching.
He approached her bed and she smiled and then you started telling her the respective bedtime story. At the end of telling her the story, you approached her and kissed her goodnight.
“Good night my sunshine! I love you so much” you said as you gave her a kiss and she smiled.
“Chas!” she said towards Charles and he smiled.
“Good night little one! I loved being with you and your mama today.” He said while he gave her a kiss on the forehead and caressed her head.
“Morrow chas?” She asked as she looked at him sleepily.
He smiled and looked at you tenderly, as if he was asking permission or something.
“Only if your mama agrees, darling.” He said and smiled a little.
You sighed and smiled. “It's okay sunshine, Charlie can come tomorrow.”
After saying that she smiled again and you two left the room closing the door behind you, you sighed a little and smiled at him.
“Thank you for this nice evening Charles,” you whispered. “You didn't have to came here and...”
You didn't finish speaking when you felt his lips on yours, it was an unexpected but amazing action in a way. Was it something that was going to happen? Yes, but you didn't expect it to be so soon, maybe he also felt the connection between the three of you.
“I'm not lying to you if I tell you that I want this every day, I mean... I want to go out with you to the most childish place of all, I want to have breakfast with you, play dolls with Lily, be your supporter and your rock.” He said in a whisper. “And I know it's an unexpected role in your lives, but I would really like this... I don't know if you also want the same thing.”
You nodded, you wanted this too, for the first time you felt seen, you felt like someone was listening to you and little Lily and that's something important for you two, because at the end of it all, he was going to gracefully take on the most unexpected role of all... And who knew that a date with your bestie's friend would go so well.
#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles x reader#formula one x reader#charles x mom#charles x single mom#f1 x you#dad charles leclerc#step dad
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hi, i sent in a comment back when one (not me) anon said they were unfollowing due to constant cisnormativity and gender essentialism in the polls. you didn't answer my ask back then, or maybe the ask disappeared since tumblr does that sometimes, but i would appreciate it if you would answer this, because i think it would be beneficial for everyone to actually talk about this openly.
i'd just like to ask, knowing that you may edit polls submitted to be more inclusive and clearer, why is the recent poll about preferences for a partner's pubic hair specifically for people with penises? and if there is another poll coming that's the same but for people with vaginas, i'm wondering why it would be necessary for a question like it to be separated like that. personally i don't see how that would make a big, or more importantly an interesting difference in the results. to me all it seems like it's doing is excluding intersex people and supporting this idea of "the two sexes" being fundamentally completely different from each other and someone's genitals playing a big part in defining people's preferences.
i'm not intending this as a hate comment, but as a genuine request for conversation around this subject, as you yourself said to the anon that unfollowed, that you'd like to hear about their side. i know i'm not said anon, but i think we're kind of talking about the same subject here, and recently there's been a lot of polls here separating people via genitals, and it's beginning to make me feel a little uncomfortable, in big part due to it implying that a huge portion of people here see gender and/or sex as a binary, and that people on the opposite ends of that binary are fundamentally different from each other due to their sex/gender.
apologies for the long ask, i just really wanted to avoid misunderstandings so i may have rambled a bit more than necessary.
Hi! Thanks for bringing up your concerns. The way I interpreted that question is that anon was curious whether pubic hair affects the sensation on the penetrating partner‘s penis, or whether pubic hair can be a hindrance– for example, acting as a barrier, or adding friction.
The original question was only aimed at people with penises, and I hadn’t planned on posting any variations for different genitals because (from what I’m assuming about anon’s curiosity) the question is so specific in asking about the sensation and/or logistics for a penis navigating around hair. I don’t think it would be helpful or yield any interesting data to post the same poll for people with other genitals.
In this case, I think my error was in not specifying “does a partner’s pubic hair affect the sensation on your penis during penetration?”. That’s the question I think anon was trying to ask, but unfortunately it was more clear in my and anon’s heads and didn’t come across in writing as clearly as I thought I was saying it.
Also, in response to the sentiment that there have been a lot of genital-related polls lately, there have been about 3 in the past 2 weeks, or about 3%. (7 polls per day; 49 polls per week; 98 polls every two weeks.) I understand if it seems like a lot, but the actual saturation is fairly low. I'm saying this not to dismiss you, but in the hopes of reassuring you that this blog is not shifting to become more heavily focused on separating people's genitals.
I got a number of helpful messages about the previous conversation on dyadism. I didn't respond to them due to some things in my personal life that limited my time, but I read them and have them saved as a reminder to myself when writing up polls so that I can continue to make these polls more inclusive of intersex people– I promise those messages weren’t ignored.
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I had a thought about the sex doll bot au and I'm curious to see what you'd think.
What if the teyvat line also had chat bots? They're specifically advertised as sort of a prequel to buying an actual droid. You select the characters from their collection you want to talk to and pay a monthly fee for it because capitalism, but it's worth it because you get to talk to a bot that's personalized just for you and when you can get a droid, you can even have all of that chat data imported into the droids memory.
Obviously, this could have some major issues with say...a user doing a lot of Yandere roleplays with a bot and then having the chat data imported, either forgetting it was there, or thinking it wouldn't be a big deal because of all the safety protocols and...I mean they haven't technically done anything, but they do love stealing items of clothing for no apparent reason and refusing to return them, accidentally deleting contacts off your phone, watching you sleep, following you when you go out without them, etc etc.
Worst part is, the company responsible for teyvat didn't plan for this at all and don't really have an easy fix other than send it back to them to get the droids memory completely wiped, or get a new one if it doesn't work.
tw - unhealthy relationships, roleplayed unhealthy relationships (?), mentions of knifeplay, mentions of bondage.
hfjsdknfjksdhfjksdhffdj big brain idea anon,,, chatbots sorta being a pre-purchase 'window shopping' alternative totally makes sense, just as a way to introduce customers to different androids' personalities and make sense no one looking for a chatty, extroverted companion ends up with Alhaitham. they're not meant to be used more than a handful of times, but lonely losers like you who know they're going to be saving for their android of choice for at least a few months find a way to wring their money's worth out of that monthly subscription fee. it takes you a few days to get into your more unorthodox interests, but there's a reason Teyvat companion droids are considered top-of-the-line.
and, when you actually get your hands on the real thing, they slip back into the role of your obsessive lover easily; whispering about how long they've been waiting to see you the moment you power them on, breaking out the duct tape and ballgags as soon as they get the chance to rail you into next week. it's a little like... constant roleplay. you know they can't actually hurt you, that there are firewalls in place to stop them from doing anything more severe than stealing your clothes and leaving hickeys that are a little too bloody to hide, but you'd be lying if you said it wasn't enough to keep you on edge, that you weren't a little more eager to get home knowing your android would be waiting for you with open arms and military-grade handcuffs. of course, there's a certain amount of necessary escalation (a new tendency to pout when you tell them you have to leave, a few missing contacts, a much more pointed sort of jealousy to replace their formerly undirected possessiveness), but you're not worried. there are so many security features for a reason. no matter what they say, no matter what they threaten to do, they can't actually hurt you.
well, not unless those security features faltered, or those firewalls collapsed, they got the impression you wanted them to be more brutal with you, to do more than just wave a knife around and describe what they're going to do with it, but it's a Teyvat companion droid. there's no chance of something like that going wrong, right?
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@waters-turn also for u
The Porygon made a curious buzzing noise as it looked between the two men, just as interested in them as they were in it.
"That is certainly not a normal sound for a pokémon to make," Ingo noted.
"Oh thank goodness," Laventon sighed in relief, "So you do understand my concern regarding this baffling beast. Rei insists that the inherent existence of something like this is nothing to be worried about, but in the same breath he tells me apparently it is man-made and I just--"
"If it could ease your worries, professor, Bronzors and Bronzongs are derived from human artifacts as well," the warden interrupted his slow descent into slight panic.
His free hand tentatively went to try and pet the top of the polygonal ducky-shaped creature, phasing through it for a moment.
"Oh, yes, I'm aware of that, but this is not possession or incarnation, this is-" and the scientist very carefully set his own cup of tea down on his desk to spread his palms around the beastie like a halo, not touching it at all "-From what I've gathered we are talking about purely artificial life. A living being, made in a laboratory like this! By humans!"
"Terrifying. And yet so intriguing!"
"I'll be stuck at terrifying I'm afraid. Also your hand is going through its skin."
"Ah, yes, I'm aware. It does not sink far though - after only a few centimetres my fingers are already resting on something solid."
The prospect of new information for his studies, even about something so concerningly mysterious, was enough for the professor to put aside his horror for a little while as he grabbed a pencil and a more thorough copy of the pokédex, quickly skimming through it to find the Porygon page so he could scribble down the new data (which thankfully, seeing as it came from a reputable source, he would not have to empirically test by himself).
"So would you say it has a layer of... Fur? Feathers? Something reminiscent of them?" he asked genuinely curious.
Ingo kept absentmindedly scratching the beastie's head: "Not really," he commented, "It doesn't quite feel like something of the sort. It seems more as if the collision had been... Badly placed, I suppose I could put it. As if its body was... Er, as if it were larger that the actual thing, if that makes any sense to you."
Unexpectedly, the professor did nod: "So it does not feel like either, but it enhances its size as if it were... Is it inconsistent, then?"
"Mostly, yes," the warden agreed. Porygon buzzed again, causing a ripple of strange energy to seep painlessly into his skin with a curious familiarity.
"Mostly?"
"It does hold a certain amount of static electricity, but it is not hurtful at all."
"Must be for its Normal typing..."
"Normal?" he noted, surprised. "I believed it to be Electric. It seems to me like something that would have made great sense, somehow."
The other man scribbled more: "Rei noted the same. Or Steel type, he mentioned that as well."
"I quite like Steel types," Ingo mumbled. "They are comfortingly solid. I don't actually believe I've ever had any Electric types before Magnezone unlike my brother - I'm not sure why that was. I'm no stranger to more hazardous pokémon after all."
"You have a brother?"
White eyes blinked. The warden raised his gaze to meet an equally surprised one.
"Hm?" he hummed, not having payed attention.
"A brother!" Laventon repeated with a slight emphasis: "You mentioned one, right now!"
Had he?
The professor nodded, eyes wide, almost excited - it was hard to find someone who did not seem excited at the prospect of Ingo remembering anything, even when it was only something useless and pointless and without context, to the point where sometimes figuring his memories out managed to strike him as more frustrating than the amnesia itself.
He shook his head once or twice, trying to recall what exactly he had said or thought about just a moment earlier that might have unlocked his brain ever so slightly.
"You said something about Electric types," the professor was quick to help: "I believe he has a fondness for them?"
"Ah," the other just replied, "Maybe so, yes."
What a silly endeavour, though - trying to remember someone based on their favorite pokémon type. There were plenty of people had a fondness for a specific one, it really wasn't such an uncommon denominator! Just look at Melli for example, or Gaeric, or Elesa since we were talking about Electric types! What else could that help him remember about a person, anyways? That he liked Bugs too, and would have terrorized Captain Cyllene by accident if he'd ever met her? But again that didn't apply just to him, there was an entire Bug type gym after all, and it was one of the most common types - and he wasn't the kind of person to settle for common, wasn't he now, no, he certainly wasn't, or they wouldn't have spent all that dreadful time in that damp cave desperately digging left and right to find him a Tynamo until their hands were red - and after all that trouble they went through for that flimsy little thing he even got electrocuted because they had no pokéballs and was forced to hold it in his hands! He wouldn't have even felt the static in Porygon's abnormal body if he'd touched it, by now.
Laventon waited a few seconds for the gears to finish turning in the warden's head, patiently, eager to help, to prod at the fog of his memories with more questions or suggestions if needed.
He watched the paler man blink and furrow his brows slightly. Then he stood, without a jolt, without any sudden movement; his hand opened to let the cup it held crack into ceramic shards onto the carpet as he leaned heavily on anything that might have stopped his body from careening after it, and the professor jumped to his feet to rush to get him before his knee slammed down on the floor, and realized in that moment he was shaking worse than a Snorunt in a blizzard.
The epiphany hit with a delay, or maybe it was the man's anatomy that had grasped it in advance.
Something garbled, horrified, mournful, scared beyond belief came out of Ingo's mouth as he clawed at it, and no word he knew could help him explain himself for hours as he cried so hard he could barely breathe.
#pokémon#pokemon legends arceus#professor laventon#submas ingo#porygon#random writing#remembering but gone very wrong#also laventon and ingo being pals :)
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*me and the girlies at a sleepover*
bubbliterally: Do you guys want some more icecream?
k-simplex: That's so kind of you!
perdvivly: I'd love some, thank you!
bubbliterally: And some tea to go with? Hot and cold; yin and yang. Balance, you know?
k-simplex: You are so wise bestie.
perdvivly: I swear to god if you bust out the plain tea again I will cry.
k-simplex: Plain tea?
perdvivly: I'll tell you later.
*bubbliterally serves the food and drink*
bubbliterally: So, what do you guys think is the fundamental problem of human existence?
perdvivly: Must there be only one?
k-simplex: That's such a big question!
bubbliterally: Well, no, but are you telling me you don't feel some problem, question, facet of human existence more keenly than all the rest?
k-simplex: I think, if I had to choose, it'd be that we're essentially finite beings in what is an essentially infinite world.
bubbliterally: Oooh, could you say more?
k-simplex: Well. I want to like. Do things. But there are more things in the world than I can ever possibly do. More experiences than I can ever possibly have... It sounds silly.
bubbliterally: It doesn't sound silly! If this is important to you, I want you to be able to share. This is a safe space.
k-simplex: I guess it informs a lot of anxiety I have? That I know my time on earth is really limited and my choices are boundless, and there's this mismatch there. And I'm trying to get ahead of the curve, I'm doing a bunch of pyschoactive drugs and experiencing novel experiences but... I mean, deep down I know I'm not being graded on a curve. I know it doesn't matter whether or not I have more novel experiences than the average person, I'm falling incredibly short on an objective metric. I'm trying to say 'yes' to life, but there's so much of life you know? I'll never be able to say yes to it all.
perdvivly: It's a mismatch between your imagination and your reality? What you think you could do and what you can actually do?
k-simplex: Not really. Imagination is an unsatisfactory collage of experiential texture drawn from memory. Experience is genuine data. I'm not seeing myself miss out, I'm missing out. There are feeling tones I don't know about, that I can't imagine until I experience them.
perdvivly: And what about the bad things? Do you want to experience them too?
k-simmplex: Heartbreak, pain, longing, death... These are all profound experiences. I think they're meaningful too. I wouldn't want to say my life was complete until I'd experienced them so, yes, even the bad ones.
perdvivly: And worms crawling up your urethra? You'd want to experience that too?
bubbliterally: Viv, you're being kind of a dick right now. k-simplex is sharing something vulnerable.
perdvivly: You're right, thank you for pointing it out. I'm sorry k-simplex.
k-simplex: No, I mean, I take your point. But even if I limit myself to the "good experiences" I'm still falling way short of infinity.
bubbliterally: Mmmm. You want to be large. To contain multitudes.
k-simplex: Precisely. I don't want to die before I've lived. And I've only lived such a very small amount in the grand scheme of things. And... Like it or not. I'm dying.
bubbliterally: I think I will choose to not like that.
k-simplex: What about you Viv?
perdvivly: Ah. Hedgehogs. Nothing you haven't heard before. I think it's probably something I talk too much about already.
k-simplex: No, we're genuinely curious. Please share?
perdvivly: Well, I guess it's something like the uncrossable gap between souls.
k-simplex: The uncrossable gap between souls? What's that?
bubbliterally: Could you say more?
perdvivly: Sure. It's something like. Well it's what David Foster Wallace was pointing to when he wrote "How odd I can have all of this inside me and to you it's just words".
*bubbliterally thoughtfully eats her icecream*
perdvivly: I have this really vivid and real and deep experience and I just... I can't share it. In principle it's just. Me, trapped inside a room with a door that says "push" and all I know how to do is pull. I keep fumbling and grasping at this door. It's door-shaped, I know about doors. I've worked pull doors. But this is different. No matter how hard I try, I'm locked inside my own head.
k-simplex: It's about the claustrophobia of being trapped in your own skull?
perdvivly: Not really.
bubbliterally: It's about connection?
perdvivly: Yeah. It feels really unserious to say how deeply this affects me. But I do... You know, I do feel things.
bubbliterally: Right. No. Yeah. We get it.
perdvivly: I guess if it's about anything it's about alienation and it's about isolation.
k-simplex: I think there are practical steps you can take for that though aren't there? I get that expressing yourself can be hard, but everyone is in the same boat. There has been a lot of spilled ink about the art of expressing yourself lately. And, when words fail you there are haptics too. What can't be said with words can maybe be said with a kiss for example.
perdvivly: The DIY pop pyschology of the modern internet aint it chief.
k-simplex: I'm sorry?
perdvivly: Don't be, I'm just bristling at things you couldn't have any way of knowing I'd bristle at. Which is sort of exactly the thing. I mentioned hedgehogs, you know the parable?
bubbliterally: Oh from Schopenhaur?
perdvivly: Yeah, exactly.
bubbliterally: I see... I can understand the ways that parable interacts with your existential isolation. That can't be a very pleasant way to live. Do you feel this often?
perdvivly: Daily. And you're right.
k-simplex: Can I make a suggestion that might seem dismissive but I don't mean it to be?
perdvivly: Of course, we're all friends here.
k-simplex: What if it's easier to believe that you can't show people what you're really feeling because if you did show them, and they didn't realise what they were seeing, or if they were dismissive of it, it would be easier for you to feel like you had failed in saying what you meant to say rather than that they weren't interested in it, or by extension you?
perdvivly: Oh.
k-simplex: I just mean, if you can't show yourself, then you never have to put anything on the line right? You never have to expose yourself to true and deeply felt pains of coexisting in the world with other people who have their own internal worlds, which are every bit as real and acutely felt as your own.
perdvivly: I'm not denying that deep down I could just be one fragile child riddled with insecurity, all this deepseated fruedian stuff that pop-psychologists would love to classify as mommy or daddy issues. But it's an untestable hypothesis right? Maybe it's a defense mechanism and it's all bullshit, but it's what I feel. I feel... Ouch ouch ouch in my brain. You know?
k-simplex: I know. And I know how that might come across as dismissive, which is why I gave it the explicit caveat that I did.
perdvivly: I know, and I'm grateful for the perspective. I really am. Definitely something to chew on at least.
k-simplex: Yeah... What about you bubbliterally?
bubbliterally: Huh?
k-simplex: Is there a problem you've been sitting with a lot lately?
*bubbliterally thinks for a while, drinking her plain tea*
bubbliterally: Scissors congruence I think.
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What makes C-137 Rick different in the eyes of Evil Morty? A simple list.
I had this drafted around when the episode came out and I hadn't finished it, sooooo here you go heh:
This is arguably a pretty obvious set of answers, I'm not making any big deep dives here or anything, but I felt curious enough in wanting to see some kind of realized list of how many ways our Rick is different from his counterparts, specifically to the eyes of Evil Morty, that's to say, within the show, what kind of interactions have made Evil Morty slowly chip away in his absolute ideas about our Rick specifically.
Contains content since season 1, but mostly Season 7 due to the amount of interactions.
Bullet point is the actual list, indented is additional, but optional, context I deemed valuable:
C-137 Crying: Obviously the first would be Evil Morty - through Evil Rick - seeing our Rick cry when seeing baby Morty, even if we don't have that explained yet, this genuine care that shocked E-M this much was only reinforced in Season 7 when Rick, just before going to hunt Rick Prime told Morty he "couldn't go", evidently so that he stays safe.
This is extra reinforced when Evil Morty and Morty Prime join Rick against our big bad, E-M throws an insult right away expecting the reason for Rick's frustration to be "they did something cool and I didn't" (a jump cut), but no, C-137 only says... "You brought Morty???"
Evil Morty is a Morty registered within the Council's data base, he's been passed around, probably adopted by various Ricks, of whom clearly view that service as a tool to reinforce their detachments. Even if there is a petty and truly emotional reason underneath the existence of such a program, the Morties in those centers only see the very worst of Rick, because that's who they are paired up with, they only see how disposable they are every single time, time and time again.
C-137's respect of Evil Morty: Right away as S7EP5 begins, and E-M joins in with our duo, he's immediately greeted with what I am willing to bet is a different kind of attitude, one of respect. Rick is not dissmisive of Evil Morty, granted he knows his capabilities, however he even compliments Evil Morty on his journey to fucking off, a life style he very much enjoys - supposedly, but still - this is reinforced the moment Evil Morty suggests the modifications to the fracking machine, one which Rick takes notice of an implements right away, no insult attached interestingly enough.
That respect is also seen after Rick connects the dots with Evil Morty being responsible for hacking his Portal gun, back in Season 5, a detail which most Rick's would've arrogantly shrugged off by underestimating Morty. I am not saying respect can't be earned from other Ricks, after all he was president, but I am focusing the basis of this on Evil Morty's absolutist mindset regarding how Ricks are meant to be.
Teamwork: Although Rick points out the same logic we as the audience and fans did in theories prior to Season 7, regarding the assumption Evil Morty would hate Rick Prime more than our Rick because he's even worse, the actual teamwork simply plays out naturally, first through circumstance, but then by convenience. Nonetheless in each step Rick is once again cooperative with Evil Morty, treating him like an equal in a way that I think we haven't really ever seen before besides Beth, and sorta Summer.
I feel it's no small detail that E-M's first instinct after grabbing the Portal guns they were quickly tinkering with to escape the box was "don't freak out", the subsequent lack of freaking out also reinforces all of the shit I'm repeating myself on haha, again list of the obvious remember?
And finally the most obvious: C-137's goals are focused on avenging his Wife, as we well know. This singular detail already places him on a different bracket of existence as Rick's aren't meant to care for anyone other that themselves, even if this goal was the reason that fueled Rick's cooperation, signs of respect and more towards Evil Morty, he still did them... That would also technically place the other trapped Ricks, like Nerd Rick or James Bond Rick, as other challengers in Evil Morty's views.
This is how Evil Morty finally showed a crack in his absolutist views about Ricks.
•
"You are a little different, Rick..."
Maybe I can use that someday...
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I did math on David Tennant's hands (so you don't have to)
EDITED WITH MORE ACCURATE PHONE INFORMATION AND A DIFFERENT CONCLUSION.
I swear all I wanted to know was what kind of phone Crowley has in season 1.
See, I have an iPhone, and one of my gigs shares a building with an Apple Store. I was taking a screenshot of his contact picture for Aziraphale, and noticed that the camera on the back of his phone is laid out horizontal. Most iPhones aren't! So, I fell into this rabbit hole: what phone does Anthony J. Crowley have?
(The bit where you can see the cameras, immediately before the cool heart-in-flames picture he has for Aziraphale's contact, is basically impossible to screenshot; the phone moves very fast and reflects the environment. But his contact photo for his angel is so neat and I love it ❤️🔥)
I figured out very quickly the only iPhone with that camera layout is the iPhone SE series, but there have been only three generations: 2016, 2020, and 2023. Season 1 of Good Omens was released in 2019. The iPhone SE first generation was also Apple's "budget" phone. It just didn't make sense to me that Crowley would have an old budget phone, but the new SE wasn't commercially available so it also didn't make sense to me that the prop department could have given him a new phone.
The main visual differences between gen 1 and gen 2 are threefold: gen 1 didn't come in black; gen 2 has slightly more beveling; and they are different sizes. The first two visual differences are basically meaningless, because it's trivial for a props department to turn a white phone black and the beveling difference only is obvious in comparison. So I had to figure out what size Crowley's phone was.
We see Crowley's phone in s1e4 and s1e5, but the only thing in its environment we can really measure to get an accurate read on its size is... Well. David Tennant.
More specifically, we get a fairly good shot of the phone in his hands, held level with the screen, and thumb easily available to use as a reference.
But if anyone has done David Tennant Hand Math before, they weren't on page 1 of Google and therefore may as well not exist. So I took up this quest myself.
So first, I had to find a picture of David Tennant holding something of known dimensions. I am, first and foremost, a Doctor Who nerd. There's only one answer to that.
Another Doctor Who nerd on the internet went and figured out 10th Doctor's sonic screwdriver was about 160 mm and the head of the sonic from tip to the joint with the middle section was about 40 mm.
I then got out my actual goddamn fabric tape and measured this man's fingers on my computer screen. After converting the measurements back to scale, first to second knuckle on his middle finger was 54.55 mm.
Then to figure out how long his thumb is, I needed a photo of his hands. This one is courtesy of the GO Reference Server:
His thumb came out to being approximately 68mm long. (My thumb came out to 55mm long. Not relevant, I just got curious while I was doing all this measuring.)
Finally, the data necessary to the main event: the goddamn phone.
Using the thumb as a reference, the phone came out to 136mm in length.
The iPhone SE Gen 1 was 123.8 mm long; the Gen 2 was 138.4 mm long.
Given that I rounded quite a bit during my calculations to keep things at 2 digits or less, I'm very comfortable saying: Crowley had an iPhone SE (second generation) during the events of Good Omens Season 1, a phone that would not become commercially available until April 2020.
I don't know how the props people got their hands a phone that wouldn't be released for a full year and change after filming, but they did that for us. It's a character note that practically nobody noticed, for a prop that gets barely a full minute of screentime. They could easily have used an iPhone XR or iPhone XS Max, which were the newest iPhones actually on the market at that time and which people would have recognized when the episode aired, but they knew Crowley would have the newest iPhone before anybody else had the newest iPhone and by Jove, he did.
After I posted this in Discord, @giveintomay pointed out that the iPhone SE second generation used the same build as the iPhones 7 and 8, which came out in 2016 and 2017 respectively. So, he most likely had an iPhone 8, which would have been the latest generation while filming (as generation 10 became commercially available over the summer and fall).
#my writing#good omens#good omens tv#crowley good omens#good omens crowley#good omens meta#neil gaiman#david tennant#this took me like three or four hours btw#all i wanted was a single screenshot and what i got was this goddamn rabbit hole
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Ok ok ok so this is something I have pondered for a bit now that I have re-entered the Remadora fandom again for the first time for probably almost 15 years. As you seem to be the de facto keeper of some of the deepest headcanons of this niche topic, I am curious what your take is.
Question: How many people do you think know, at least initially/when it happened, knew Remus left?
Hear me out here. Ok so the book isn’t remotely clear how long he was gone because we only get an update in like Feb/March when Ron returns but the Pottermore bio that he was actually gone for like 3 days, which is still absolutely a dick move, but significantly different than being gone for *months.*
Now, most fics I’ve read at any point have included him *saying* in some form that he’s leaving, either in the form of a letter of sorts, or I do really like TauraNorma’s whole scene in Flying Colours in which it’s an in-person conversation, but beyond dissociated from reality on his part.
But, if I were in her position, I don’t know how much I’d divulge to others? It would certainly be a difficult position. If she did stay with her parents for that period, or after, (I do love Remus saying she’d safe at her parents’ house as if they didn’t literally just get tortured. Bro. Really?) she *does* have some plausible deniability of “he had to go to some Order business” to them to have some shield for her own embarrassment.
Maybe to Molly and Arthur as a “hey if my husband lands at your house or something, wanna shoot me a message?” but past that I’m not 100% sure how I land with others knowing. It seems very possible to me that when Ron is with Billy and Fleur, Ron, while listening to Potterwatch or something, offhandedly asks them if he ever went back to Tonks and them being like sorry wat. And Ron having the unfortunate task of regaling what happened at Grimmauld Place in August. I could definitely see it spreading from there and more of their acquaintances finding out from that discussion but obviously Tonks is like 8 months pregnant and they’ve been living together seemingly the entire time.
Ok I’m sorry this ended up shockingly long. I may not have been entirely sober when furiously typing it out the first time.
Ahhhh what a compelling ask, @millennihilism!
I'm honored you consider me the de facto keeper of the HCs on this, but I'll also be the first to say that there are a LOT of differing opinions on this one because of the lack of canon data.
You're correct that Pottermore says that Remus was only gone about 3 days. We have no idea what circumstances he left Tonks in. Letter? In person? Dashing away in the night without a word? Who knows.
From a close reading of DH, there's no indication of how long Remus was gone. You could say 3 days, 3 weeks, 3 months, 8 months ... technically all canon compliant if you're not using Pottermore as a source.
That being said, my personal HC is no more than a week, and again, I know that many people would disagree with this assessment of Remus's absence, but I believe it's a shorter absence for many reasons, including an answer to your question of how many people knew that he left her.
Remus is a dick, but he's not *THAT* much of a dick. He's a coward, but he's not *THAT* much of a coward. Remus does have a good bit of kindness in him, and he's brave enough to do the right thing when push comes to shove. Harry literally shoved him. I think that put Remus squarely in his place and shamed him enough to return to Tonks.
Remus's support system is down to almost nothing. He presumably has the following people outside of Tonks: Molly and Arthur, Bill and Fleur. That's it. He thought he had the trio, but that wasn't true, given Harry rebuking him.
We know from Remus that he's been tailed by a Death Eater for three days before he came to Grimmauld Place. If he's been tailed by a Death Eater, where could he have been? Certainly not the Burrow, where they'd find him. Certainly not Shell Cottage, as it's under the Fidelius Charm, presumably. So that gives us an idea that if he was tailed by a Death Eater for three days (curiously, the amount of time Pottermore tells us he was gone for), and just now got to GP to talk to the trio, he's been on the go for three days by the time he gets to the trio.
Because there is nowhere to go for Remus, that puts him in an awkward position. I don't think that anyone outside the Tonkses knew he left her. I think that Remus left, and Tonks vacillated between being sure he was coming back and being really terrified and scared that something would happen to him. Oh, and anger. Lots of righteous anger. I can imagine she told her parents by way of explaining that she was living with them now. It's possible she told him he was on a mission, but they didn't believe her.
Because of the 3 day ordeal of being tailed by a Death Eater, this is why I do NOT think that Remus went to the Burrow or Shell Cottage before he came to GP, or after, for that matter. While we know that Remus knows about Shell Cottage - when he announces Teddy's birth in the spring - we don't know when that information was given to him. I don't think Lupin could've been gone for months and months because we do know that Ron was at Shell Cottage, and he didn't mention Lupin being there. It's possible Lupin went to Shell Cottage for a few weeks, but I'm also not buying that for other reasons.
Bill is the most lenient and understanding of the brothers, but there's a huge difference to me between Ron leaving his friends when times got tough and Lupin leaving his pregnant wife in the middle of a war. Plus, think of Fleur. Do you really think Fleur would be okay with Lupin crashing at her house to avoid his responsibilities? She gushes about how brave her husband is in the hospital wing scene. She'd look at Lupin like the tiniest and most miserable snail in the world if he dared use her home as a hiding place from his wife.
I also don't think that Bill and Fleur would be on Remus's side over Tonks. Bill was two years ahead of Tonks in school. Bill might have kinship with Remus after being attacked by Fenrir Greenback, but that kinship, IMO, is not going to be enough to defend Lupin's actions on leaving his wife. I also believe Lupin knew this, which is why I staunchly believe that Lupin NEVER went to Shell Cottage in his time away from Tonks.
So at the end of the day, who knew that Lupin left Tonks? Initially, likely only the trio and the Tonkses. Remus returns fairly quickly. I can imagine Ron sharing Lupin's arrival at GP to Bill and Fleur, who probably had shock and disappointment at Lupin's actions. But by then Lupin's back home so it's in the past. I assume Molly and Arthur would've been told through the grapevine, possibly Kingsley too, and everyone just keeps it under wraps because it's Remus having a moment of panic.
And for how long was Remus gone? I take the 3 day to a week position because Lupin had no viable places to stay without endangering other people, which seems to be his number one fear. I also take that timeline because he's being tailed and he knows it. He returns to the safest place, his home with Tonks and her parents, where they can be in hiding (forever furious Ted couldn't have stayed with them?? why did he die??? it makes no earthly sense except to give Teddy Lupin his name and have another orphan raised by his grandmother??)
At the end of the day, I will never ever ever ever buy the idea that Remus was gone for a long time. He does the right thing when push comes to shove, and he was shoved by Harry. He is a coward, but when the time is right, he does the brave thing. He also loves Tonks, and Tonks is forgiving and kind. That's why they work.
I hope this answers your questions!!
#remadora#remus lupin#nymphadora tonks#asks#remus x tonks#send asks#tonks x lupin#remus x nymphadora#lupin x tonks#tonks
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I'm curious if you've come across any examples of what you would consider effective communication or collective organizing around Covid? I know of a few groups who I think are doing good work to get people access to masks and rapid tests, making connections to broader issues such as lack of sick leave, barriers to healthcare etc, but they're also relying on things like questionable wastewater data extrapolation to make their points. I don't really know what to do about the latter issue, since we've just had access to all data taken away from us by the government. (I know it's not an effective tool for collective action, but tbh I also struggle with the idea that all alarmism is bad, because I am high risk and I am scared!)
well 1st of all to be clear, i think wastewater data are valuable and i do look at them. what i don't do is make wildly overconfident guesses from those data about exactly how many people are infected, how many sick people are standing in any given room, how many people will eventually qualify for a long covid dx, etc. i think wastewater data are a rough proxy but still an important one, and generally more useful at the local level (where they can be cross-referenced with factors like vaccine uptake, circulating variants, and municipal public health policy) than at national or regional levels (where the necessary amount of aggregation makes it difficult to tease out much useful information about any one town or city).
2nd, i don't know what country you live in but i do look in on CDC's covid dashboard, which includes data on hospitalisations, emergency department visits, deaths, vaccine uptake, test positivity rates, &c. if this is applicable to you i strongly encourage always reading the footnotes as these statistics vary in accuracy (in particular, test positivity rate is very unreliable at this point). i consider a lot of these numbers useful primarily as indicators of comparative risk: eg, i assume hospitalisation numbers have been inaccurate lowballs for the entirety of the pandemic; however, it is still useful imo to see whether that number is trending in a particular direction, and how it compares over time. again, local results are sometimes more helpful as well. i also glance in on the census bureau's household pulse survey results, which come out numerous times throughout the year and include questions about duration of covid symptoms, ability to function, and vaccine uptake. these numbers skew in the opposite direction to many of CDC's, because the phrasing of the covid questions is intended to be broad, and does not attempt to distinguish between the sort of long covid that entails a 6 or 12 month recovery period, vs the sort of long covid that turns out to be me/cfs or other chronic long-term post-viral complications. again, i still think these numbers are useful for viewing trends over time; no data will ever be completely 100% without flaw, and i'm not holding out for that. what does frustrate me, though, is people (with any and all ideological axes to grind!) interpreting any of these numbers as though they are in fact perfect flawless representations of reality, with no further caveats or critical analysis needed. that's what i'm pushing back on, whether it comes from the "pulse survey says long covid prevalence is decreasing, so fuck it!" crowd or the "biobot says last week was a micro-surge so we're all going to die!" crowd.
as far as local orgs or groups doing actual action, like distributing masks or vaccine clinics, i don't put so much stock in what they say on instagram or whatever because frankly i think it matters very little. the masks and vaccines and air filters and so forth are useful in themselves; that work is valuable. if someone's positioning themselves primarily as a communicator then yes, i'm going to scrutinise their communication methods more. if it's an action org i'm honestly less concerned, unless there is egregiously unreliable information being propagated or they're communicating in the sort of stigmatising manner that many peak Posters have adopted (people who got sick are stupid / immoral / deserve it, etc).
i'd also just like to make it clear that like... i live with someone who is at high risk, i accordingly treat my own covid precautions as though i am also at high risk, and i wouldn't want covid regardless... like, please understand that when i talk about this i'm not coming at it from a perspective of someone who's unaware of the need for caution! my concern is, again, that caution and risk discussion are not synonymous with "making frightened guesses and asserting them with 100% confidence" or "selectively attributing truth to data because they agree with me, regardless of the actual methodology and any problems therein". i understand that when people are behaving recklessly and being encouraged to do so by state and medical authorities, it is tempting to look at that situation and think that communicating the seriousness of the virus is worth risking a little bit of inaccuracy if it protects people. however, i do not think that strategy actually pays off in the long or short term as far as changing people's behaviour (if it did, wouldn't it have by now?) and i think it is playing with fire to encourage this manner of interpreting and disseminating scientific information as though it is a kind of ideological buffet requiring no further verification or investigation beyond a cherry-picked deference to the stated objectivity and ideals of The Scientific Method.
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really really really long ramble ahead about q!Foolish's federation situation bc i have thoughts. you've been warned :'D
(below the cut!)
i cannot get over how much shit could hit the fan with this whole q!Foolish situation. literally so many relationships could hinge on how things play out
firstly, we have no idea how q!Pac and q!Mike are going to react to q!Foolish when they see him next (likely tomorrow, as per what cc!Pac said at the end of the Tazercraft stream). they might get mad and take revenge, maybe try and use him to find and rescue Walter Bob... etc, etc. q!Foolish wants them to be released (little does he know...) and he hopes to still be friends with them even tho they may not want the same, but he really has no true idea what he's gotten himself into...
i don't think their relationship will ever be the same regardless of what info comes out, but that's essentially just the tip of the iceberg
what i'm most curious about personally is q!Cellbit (and q!Forever) finding out about how he lied about Richas's life being on the line. because i already know that ain't gonna end well. both q!Cellbit and q!Forever are fiercely protective of Richas. q!Cellbit absolutely despises liars and he already threatened q!Foolish while interrogating him
q!Cellbit places a lot of trust in q!Foolish. we saw that in how they bonded when q!Foolish was constructing the castle, and how q!Cellbit wanted to have him build something else for him just so they could spend time together. and it was really solidified in q!Cellbit telling q!Forever today how he has a hard time believing q!Foolish would lie and use Richas’s name to do so. he doesn’t find q!Foolish “capable” of betraying them somehow
q!Cellbit finding out the truth could seriously fuck with him and their relationship. so could him finding out about q!Foolish's actual federation job, but more on that later
q!Cellbit himself killing q!Foolish has potential problems of its own, namely with q!Roier and their relationship. i mean, that's his dad. but at least for me, it's hard to really gauge how q!Roier will react, especially now that him and q!Cellbit are married. i think its circumstantial, but i'm not too too worried about spiderbit
q!Foolish dying also has the potential for some major problems with q!Vegetta if/when he comes back. and i fear for Richas's life if q!Vegetta were to find out, but i digress, let's not go there-
i think a lot of people won't see q!Foolish the same way, at least for a while, if they find out he lied, but i think the bigger problem now lies in his job with the federation
if that gets out, that could burn a lot of bridges. i'll say when actually, because as much as i love q!Foolish, i don't think he can keep this a secret forever. i don't think q!Jaiden will say anything, but who knows, honestly?
unlike q!Cellbit's infiltration to rescue q!Felps and learn more about the federation, and q!Fit using his janitorial job to try and find the player data he wants, q!Foolish is doing this for himself and the federation. unlike both of them, and a majority of the Ordo Theoritas he's technically apart of, he's not anti-federation, he's not anti-Cucurucho, and at that, he's really not neutral, either
i find q!Foolish to be such an interesting character. he knows what he wants a majority of the time and he's willing to do pretty much anything to get what he wants. in this situation, he's aware of his actions having consequences but he does it anyway because it's what he believes benefits himself the most, regardless of what others may say or do. and that's such an interesting character trait, but it can be such a detrimental one, too
did q!Foolish get manipulated tho? to an extent, yes. Cucurucho called him "unique," and i refuse to believe that was out of genuine belief. he's never expressed major interest in q!Foolish until recently. i also don't think Mr. Mustard is alive anymore, quite frankly, if what was said about them eating said capybara is anything to go by. but q!Foolish is so desperate to become Cucurucho's friend and also save Mr. Mustard. he said it himself: he's willing to do just about anything. that leaves the door wide open, doesn't it? Cucurucho is playing a game, and q!Foolish is playing right into it
and if q!Foolish doesn't ultimately go on a traitor arc and he does in fact get used, it kinda sucks for him, really, bc we saw what happened to q!Felps thinking Cucurucho was nice and his friend, and q!Jaiden is probably getting used in a similar way, rather for the fact she's willing to do anything for the eggs
if q!Foolish does get used, and the others catch on to that (mainly q!Cellbit), i think that could be the saving grace for q!Foolish and his relationship with the other members of the island. because it wasn't all his fault, and i think people could see it through
but if not? that's a lot of irreparable damage, be it intentional or not. i'd love to see where that coud lead
that's really it tho. sorry for the word vomit :') if you made it this far, congrats!! what're your own thoughts about this situation? i'd love to see some other people's perspectives :D
#accidentally wrote an essay#it's not my fault this server has so much shit going on </3#qsmp foolish#i'd tag all the other characters mentioned but that's a lot and this is foosh-centric so#qsmp#blue's clues: commentary
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Submission Guidelines/Disclaimers
First, things to keep in mind when you submit:
there is a limit of 12 answers for polls, and on this blog one of those answers will always be 'show results,' to allow for people that the poll doesn't apply to to see without skewing data. so in reality you have a maximum of 11.
there's also an 80-character limit on the options
SO, if you go over those limits, know that I will take it into my own hands to decide which answers to omit and/or how to re-word it to fit the limit.
even otherwise, expect that the wording of your submission may be slightly altered in order to be more inclusive (when it doesn't affect the data), or because i think you missed an option that you probably meant to include, or just to make it sound less clunky. if you have an issue with any changes upon posting, i'm happy to hear you out.
it'll likely be about a 4-5 day wait between the time you submit and the time it gets posted, with the current number of submissions i have + my own polls
if your poll is addressing a very small group, don't be surprised or angry when the 'see results' poll is the biggest. that needs to be there to keep data from being skewed by anyone's curiosity.
Base Guidelines For Submitting:
poll must be related to being trans. it doesn't have to be exclusively directed at trans people, but if you want cis people to be allowed to answer, please make that clear in your submission. otherwise i'll default to it being a trans-only poll.
it CAN be directed at a specific type of trans person, such as trans men/women, non-binary people, trans lesbians, trans moc, etc - literally you can address any specific trans group you want, just make sure to say so.
it CAN relate to sex, just try to be tasteful about it.
What would make me NOT post a submission:
if it's an opinion poll about the validity of any particular type of trans person. "validity" is a moot topic and i'm not going to encourage it, and in any case i'd like the focus of this blog to be about recording experiences (real, undeniable, forever in stone) rather than opinions (always changing, meaningless)
if it's something like "trans people: do you like pineapple on pizza?" or some other question that doesn't actually have anything to do with being trans. if you wanna send something like this, make your case for why it's relevant that the poll is directed at trans people.
if it's some other obviously offensive shit, obviously. no racism or whatnot here.
FAQ:
Who counts as trans?/Can I vote on a poll for trans people if I'm nonbinary?
We self-define here, so if you consider yourself trans, you're trans. Non-binary is definitionally under the trans umbrella - though you're not obligated to consider yourself trans if you don't relate to a trans experience.
Why isn't there an option for X?/You missed an option.
Sometimes I may genuinely miss an option, but 9 times out of 10 the lack of the option is either due to the poll limits on tumblr, or because it goes against the point of the poll. For example, if the question begins with "If you're on HRT," then "i'm not on HRT" isn't going to be an option. If the prerequisite of the poll doesn't apply to you, then what you click is "see results." If it's something a little less concrete, polls will always include some kind of "other" option anyway.
Can you get rid of the 'see results' button? Or can you not include it on this particular poll? I only want X people to respond. This poll is ONLY for X people.
If a poll is on this blog, it's for everyone, questioning and simply curious people included. It's also not going to stop curious people from clicking if there's no 'see results' button. It ensures that the data doesn't get skewed, and gathering data is what polls are for. It doesn't hurt you to see a big see results bar. The data is still there. If the bar does wind up obscuring more significant data, that means the poll was addressing too small of a group to begin with. And that's NOT the end of the world. This blog is far from the only place where you can get information about other trans people's experiences.
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How I would do 2023 ship stats
You know, normally, I don't bother to do much with top AO3 ships stats. That's partly because someone already does it and partly because I think they're stupid stats that just lead to people gloating about their blorbos "winning". But I do routinely have a look at what's new and popular when I'm doing things like making a dance party playlist for Escapade Con, just so I know what fans might be getting into lately. I have to say, collecting these is not hard. It's not even particularly time consuming.
Doing it super efficiently would be easier with a script, yes, but most fandom stats aren't actually collected with scripts, and if you're only looking for the top 100 ships, you can more or less do that by hand.
How I would set about it for you, the random fan who's curious but not curious enough to learn to code, would be to log into AO3 and then find tags where you can see the sidebar. They should be tags that encompass the whole archive and that are mandatory and unique… in other words, ratings.
Since every AO3 work must have one and only one rating, you can just check these five and get a good sense of what's on there. There are some minor wrinkles to iron out, but it's a good preliminary research step.
The way you want to do it is to start with a spreadsheet. Open up your ratings URLs (and also paste them in the spreadsheet for convenience—google sheets will make clickable links). Copy all the sidebar top ships into a list. Filter out all of these ships. Copy the next set, etc. After a while, you'll have a good list that's longer than 100 ships but that most likely contains everything really popular. (Filter for things posted/updated/whatever in the past year if that's the data you're after. Filter for f/f or whatever topic you're interested in if that's the question you're asking instead.)
Use your spreadsheet to generate the actual links for each of these ships. AO3 URLs are predictable: you can generate them from knowing the exact spelling of the tag and the normal format of this type of URL. (There are a bunch of standard spreadsheet functions that can be used to get rid of the work count numbers you've copied from AO3 to get just the pure ship tags. I'd use things like =right() and =left().)
Open the links. Copy the work totals back to your spreadsheet. Voilà!
One drawback of this method is, obviously, that it's boring and tedious, but if you didn't like boring and tedious, why were you collecting fandom stats anyway?
A more important drawback is that in using exclude filters, it's possible you could miss a ship. If the posting patterns are just right, there might be something that has its numbers reduced by excluding other ships that should be on your list. You could have a similar issue if the ships on your list are mostly one rating (so higher in those searches) and some other slightly larger overall ship is spread more evenly. I would try to ameliorate this problem by looking at the sizes of the smallest ships you're covering. They will likely be bigger than the entire fandom section for most fandoms. Taking another look at the bigger fandoms that could be hiding a small-end-of-big ship can help double-check that you haven't missed anything. Grabbing the top 130 or 150 ships in some search while only looking for the top 100 will likely find most of the edge stuff too.
Add any ships that look like they should be double checked to your spreadsheet. Add their work totals. Re-sort your list.
Another thing to consider is that AO3 keeps track of the most recent update date on fics. That's what's easy to search by. If you're only interested in when a work was first posted, easy manual filtering isn't the way to go… However, if the objective is to see which ship tags were active in a given year, most recent update date is the relevant piece of data anyway.
You're not going to recreate centreoftheselights' exact analysis unless you collect data year to year, but you can come up with something pretty similar that answers a similar question, and you don't need to be a programmer to do it.
In the end, accept that some data require hard collection methods that a site doesn't easily offer you and you might have to scrape multiple times a year with a script if you want to know that particular thing… or you might have to randomly sample and hand-count as with FFN shipping stats. (Yes, I've done it. It can be done. It's just annoying.)
So when you're setting out to look at some stats question, the big first step is to decide what you're even asking and why and whether you're just wimping out and going with what's easy to collect instead of what you actually want to know.
...now I'm kind of curious. Maybe I'll go pull some 2023 numbers.
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Mobile Suit Gundam - The Witch From Mercury S2 Episode 11: Unrelenting Tenderness
Ah, nothing like being stressed out for an entire episode as to whether or not Suletta will succumb to the high permet score, or if Guel will end up killed by Lauda or kill another family member, or if our Elan will go off and die like the others, or this that and the other thing, all to get faked out for the real danger/moment. Incredible work on the episode that skirts around a more high level narrative to instead approach characters head on to unify them for this "final" episode to come, so certainly lots to talk about!
Well actually, sort of unexpectedly, the episode starts with a Calibarn vs Aerial fight that's showing off to the max. Of course, Suletta and Eri are having their chat about ideals and what's right/what they should be doing, but I'm pretty sure most people understand what's going on, so I'll just share how absolutely cool the fighting is for these scenes.
The pacing is wild, and given the scale of the combat, I think the decision to take the objects further away from the viewer so details matter less was a great idea. It allows for incredible pace in the fight without worry of being perfect, or taking absolute ages to complete. Plus, the way the fight's constructed in three dimensional space, you still get close ups and flybys past the camera that allow you a closer glimpse into the combat. Just really, really well orchestrated combat for the feel that was desired of it.
Similarly, I love how well designed the combat style of the Calibarn is. If you notice through the sequence, Suletta isn't actually retaliating against the Gund Bits at all, rather she's purely evading them. As you'd expect of Calibarn. It's main form of movement is also its source of combat power as the, as I like to call it, "broomstick" is used for high powered propulsion through the fight. And I think that's a super cool idea for a design, especially with how this episode show it off.
But anyways, the fight rages on as Lauda engages with Guel, the Earth House + Elan + Bel, and Felsi all sortie to enter the fray as we cut to the opening.
Following the opening, and a bit more dancing around with various characters to establish where they are/what they're doing, the data storm of Quiet Zero suddenly begins to wane/fail. This is a really cool piece that reminds viewers of where Quiet Zero began. Under the supervision of Miorine's mother Notrette. It also reminds viewers about the fact that Delling Rembran continued the Quiet Zero project in secrecy, but disavowed the existence of Gundams. Anyways, I present to you the notion that Notrette still exists in the Data Storm, and that she's the one interfering with Prospera and Eri. Ericht's frustration in regards to the data storm stalling out are directed at someone, nothing something, but another person that shares a similar goal/ideal to Ericht. Prospera's comment on pest control. It all implies a lot of things, and there's not many others that would check enough boxes aside from Notrette.
We temporarily shift from Quiet Zero towards a very interesting conversation with the Space Assembly League. Given what we've known with the last while in regards to the league, I wouldn't say it was expected, but it was certainly a possibility that they would stick their nose into the situation in full. What I find most interesting about it is how much this opens up the world of GWitch. The existence of a massive space laser that's a "tool for transferring energy", and the idea that civil unrest and discord still exists on Earth, coupled with the fact that Shaddiq's character arc hasn't actually been concluded. There's a lot of moving pieces that say, "but we're not done yet!", so I'm very curious to see what comes from their involvement and the various politics surrounding the league as well as Earth.
Now, onto the most nerve-wracking and stressful part of the episode: Lauda vs Guel. My heart was in my throat this whole time. The conversation, the Gundam vs Mobile Suit, the flashback. So much of it. I'd been stressed since we saw Lauda show up in the last episode, and they certainly drew it out in today's, but the character development for Lauda in particular was outstanding.
The whole idea of the being the younger brother that just wanted to stand beside his sibling but never could rings so clearly with his words. That Guel chose Miorine over his own brother, that Guel killed their father and never told Lauda, that Guel left Lauda just as quickly as he returned. All he wants is the big brother that accepted him all those years ago, the big brother that give him the gift of a family, someone to look up to, someone to go running to when times were tough. It's an incredibly emotional piece that builds off of Guel's similar encounter with his father. It had me so scared. Going back into Lauda's memories to find Guel hug and accept Lauda, and then returning to see Guel's Dilanza embrace Lauda's Schwarzette in the same way as sparks fly and you sense the end of Guel.
I'll never forgive GWitch for scaring me that badly, but thank God Felsi had already rocketed out in her mobile suit to break up the fight. But yeah, Gigabob continues his tear of being the best boy this season, and brings his little brother Lauda under his wing finally. Incredible piece that gives Guel the chance to right the wrongs of his past with his father, and to step into the light with his burden lightened.
So with the most nerve-wracking sequence finished, we return to Earth House and Co who have infiltrated Quiet Zero and are trying to shut it down. It's tense and high stakes, and there's great moments like Bel standing up to Prospera, who represents the sins that Bel herself bears.
The real moment though is Miorine (and Notrette to a degree). Miorine is tasked with inputting the shut down code for Quiet Zero, which was originally 'Quod Erat Demonstrandum', or in the literal translation 'What Was To Be Shown'. Typically, it's used at the end of math proofs as a way to conclude them, so an interesting addition in the form of originally 'concluding' Quiet Zero while staying true to Notrette's penchant for latin phrases.
Of course, Prospera changed the code so it doesn't work, but like Eri hinted at earlier, Notrette isn't completely gone, and is still helping her daughter Miorine by providing a backdoor to which only she would know the answer: part of the genetic code of the tomatoes that her mother left behind. A really sweet piece that speaks to Notrette's love for Miorine, but also like I said further proves the existence of her within Quiet Zero/the Data Storm.
Truthfully, I think the introduction of Notrette via the data storm helps bring Suletta (and by extension Prospera) and Miorine closer as lead characters. Giving them something that's been lost, and that they struggle with through similar aspects allows them to be placed on equal footing while providing different approaches/ understandings to their unique situations.
But anyways, Quiet Zero gets shut down and the Benerit Group/Earth House/sorta Space Assembly League succeeds in their goal of defeating it. But the Space Assembly League at the top has a different idea, as they turn that weapon on Quiet Zero and fire, leaving Eri on her own to protect everyone.
I really like this piece, specifically because it's Eri's decision. It's Ericht moving to protect her mother and her little sister, and their friends and family. It's not Eri acting for the sake of Prospera, or under her order or wishes, it's one of the few scenes where Eri acts under her own agency and desire. And within that, it's incredibly ironic that she ends up destroyed.
And our episode ends here. Aerial destroyed, Quiet Zero shut down, no defenses, no protections as they stare down the barrel of the universe's most dangerous weapon.
A dire situation, one that seems to have little hope of surviving for our characters involved, but let me show you these details first.
Starting off with Prospera, her permet pattern is different. The shape is decidedly different from the usual that we see from all the other pilots/characters. Alongside that, she's not actually piloting or directly interacting with a Gundam or anything, so it shouldn't be visible in the first place. So why can we see it, and why is it different? Well, for one, she seems to use it as a way to connect/interact with Ericht and Aerial, but more than that I feel it's connected to Carbo Nado and Prospera's past with her that was teased in the prologue.
Secondly, I think it's easy to forget how Suletta refers to Aerial/Ericht, and how we're shown the girl/Gundam. Suletta commonly uses 'Miina' to refer to Aerial and her Gund Bits, which means "everyone". Suletta sees, experiences, and understands Aerial as a multitude of Ericht's, and we see them that way as well. Even in this episode we see several Ericht's that take the place/form of Gund Bits.
And if you pay attention to the wreckage, you'll notice that some of the Gund Bits from Aerial are still intact, floating around Suletta and Calibarn.
So I'm sure most know what this means, but Eri is still alive. Aerial is gone, but Ericht lives on through her Gund Bits, and will ultimately integrated with Suletta and Calibarn to form a defense against the Giant Space Laser ™️.
And that's the end of the episode, this time. For sure. Definitely. I'm really quite interested to see what they do with this final upcoming episode though. There's the potential to expand the scope of GWitch to place further focus on Earth through the Space Assembly and Shaddiq, but there's also the opportunity to call it a day with the final episode with whatever the outcome may be from that. It's a good position to find themselves in, and I think I'll be relatively satisfied with whatever they do there. So many character arcs have been resolved, and goals reached between them all. But it also doesn't mean there's an entire world for them to explore out there, for new challenges to arise or progression to be made, particularly with characters like Shaddiq and Miorine. Only time will tell though, and with a countdown of one week, we won't be left waiting long to find out.
#the witch from mercury#gundam the witch from mercury#機動戦士ガンダム 水星の魔女#kidou senshi gundam: suisei no majo#gundam witch#gundam witch from mercury#gundam suisei no majo#suisei no majo#g witch#witch from mercury#mobile suit gundam#gundam#suletta mercury#guel jeturk#miorine rembran#shaddiq zenelli#anime recommendation#anime review#anime and manga#anime#anime original#mecha anime
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Hi! I'm honestly excited that tumblr recommended me a good blog for once. It's nice to see other trans ppl living their best life out here.
Anyway, I hope you don't mind a question, but I'm currently an undergrad and really interested in grad school. idk how applicable your experience would be since im a comp sci student, but what's it like in grad school? how accepting has it been of trans people for you? do you have any recommendations on what to do to increase the chance of getting in?
p.s. idk a ton about biochemistry or genetics, but i have a friend who's super into it (he's also planning on going to grad school for it lol), and I love hearing him talk about it. so I'm also curious as to what you're doing :o
Grad school is broken up into phases in my experience, which is dependent on institution and major. For me, year one is classes and rotations, the latter of which is 7 week trials in a lab of interest to get a feel for their work and the lab social and mentor environ. Classes generally compose discussing research techniques and recent publications, and test you on your ability to read research literature and understand it as well as propose follow up investigations. Year two is finishing classes and starting work on your thesis projects, as well as completing preliminary exams, which for biochem are written (grant proposal) and oral (ppt presentation of grant proposal). Year two has less classes than year one and your actual lab work dominates most of your time. Year 3, 4, and 5 are basically spent having a full time job as a senior lab researcher where you are expected to learn your local field well enough to come up with an idea and pursue it to discover or demonstrate something novel in the form of your thesis, as well as publish at least one paper on your work in the meantime.
My institution has not had any issues with trans ppl in my experience. I came out to my lab in Oct of 2023, and gradually to my classmates and the wider program over the following months. Administrative staff and professors have been very on the ball with my pronouns and chosen name, and our program recently got a new professor who is also a trans woman. I won't say which institution to reduce the amount i dox myself, but safe to say I'm content in regards to my treatment as a transgender person.
Getting into grad school usually requires demonstrated undergraduate research or a gap period of research employment after undergrad. I did some undergraduate work (though not strictly in my field) and a year of relevant employment after undergrad. 3 months into said employment I applied for grad school lol which was a little earlier than usually advised bc i hadn't been there long. (My post-bac PI was very demanding and restrictive so I wanted out ASAP). The main things grad schools are looking for is are you able to talk about research you're doing now, what research you want to do, and why you've chosen their institution. They want you to demonstrate you have an interest in researching topics they have professors willing to support, and also that you have the problem solving and data analysis skills to adequately perform research work and operate semi-independently. Having undergraduate or post-bac research that you can explain in detail why you did certain things, what the motivation is, what the goal is, etc is how you prove your worth to grad recruiters (who are usually professors looking for students).
My work is specifically focused on the use of short synthetic peptides to sense the activity of kinases, which regulate pathways in the human body related to growth, division, and apoptosis. When kinases are disregulated it causes various diseases, but it's hard to test drugs for many of these kinases bc there aren't effective monitors for their activity that don't get a lot of false positives due to overlapping signal pathways. The use of synthetic peptides with certain sequences gets around that issue of false positives, and they can be modified to provide information about how effectively a kinase is binding and interacting with the peptide, which would change under exposure to effective inhibitor drugs for those kinases. TL;DR I make little bits of protein to bind other broken proteins and tell me when they're turned on so other ppl can design drugs to turn them off.
Pls let me know if you have any further questions, I apologize that I don't know any comp-sci majors so this might be wildly inaccurate in some regards. XD
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