#probably way too niche of a post but whatever
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If I had a nickel for every time a folk band I adored released an album meant to be listened to in order, which tells the story of the fall of man/ a prodigal son character (one of them is both), started with man being close to God then followed his journey of rejecting him, realizing his life was empty without him, and eventually returning back to God, had consistent themes and motifs woven through it, and ended with a reprise of the first song to represent the restoration of fellowship,
I'd only have two nickels
but it is weird that it happened twice
#like technically principium is only about Adam and Eve#and Through the Deep Dark Valley is mostly about a prodigal son figure and only kind of about Adam and Eve#BUTTTT#the point still stands#and based off of 'Like the Dawn' it is atleast partially about Adam and Eve#probably way too niche of a post but whatever#the similarities are fascinating#also STRONG recommend for both of these albums they are incredible#the oh hellos#through the deep dark valley#The Oh Hellos band#the arcadian wild#Principium#Principium The Arcadian Wild#song#song post#christian#the fall of man
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finally finished all of one character's entire quests/optional dialogue/questions/etc.... 100,000 words... .... aughhh
#Given some of it IS lines of code and stuff but like.. minus all that it's still probably at least 85 - 95k words hhhhhh#AND I have to do this for another 3 characters. Then a few partial quests for 3 others. THEN the other random misc stuff in the game#(like there are public areas in the city like a park and a forest that you can go and do a few things at. and chat with a few random#townsfolk that aren't actually full characters or anything. And there's a community board where you can#browse some of the random job advertisments or silly things that happen to be posted around#and also pick up a few odd jobs of your own to help earn coin to buy gifts for the npcs. etc. etc.)#Originally I was thinking like 'ah I'll make a short little game just to try it out! :3 It'll take maybe a few months!''#haha........................hee hee........................................hoho#Also evil that it would have been done already if I didn't totally drop itand stop working on it for like 5 years randomly#i could have made 5 years of steady slow progress gradually. instead of like 'one initial idea dump + about a month of art and writing'#...... 5 year break..... 'sudden mad dash to try to get probably 400.000 words written in a year or less' lol#I just really want to be done and have something out there already so it can lead to doing other things in my world..!!!!!! T o T#Like this can be an introduction and then maybe from that I can make other games. or short story anthologies. or other such things#But there needs to be some initially not very complex easy to interact with starting point first I guess... if that makes sense#That's part of why I stopped posting worldbuilding lore dump stuff as often because its' like.. massive walls of novella length#text are much more inacessible to engage with than like.. ooh a game! and there's characters! so its more approachable! and theres#visuals! oo! and the text is broken up in small bits line by line with other things in betwen! oo! etc. etc. lol#Not that THIS is even very accessible. I think dialogue heavy interactive fiction/visual novel type stuff is pretty niche and considered#boring or tedious compared to something with more ''gamplay'' like where you can actually move around in a world#and shoot things or whatever lol. But its an inbetween point. something SLIGHTLY#more accesible for now. Since i just dont have the budget or means or ability to make some skyrim type thing obviously LOL#Though maybe if theres any interest in the visual novel that could lead to making other things too. or at least I hope. I have a VERY cool#idea for a more ''gamey'' type of game that is a super fun concept and etc. but I would need to hire at least 2 people to make it.. ough..#I could do all the writing and probably half of the art. But I think I'd inevitably need a 3d artist and someone who can Code For Real hbjh#the system for ren'py (the thing I'm making a visual novel in) is not that complicated if you stick to just simple dialogue and stuff.#Making a whole moderately sized 3d game with minigames in it and a bunch of quest features and etc. would be out of my simplistic scope#''just learn it yourself!!' ... i barely manage to eat and sleep reliably every day lol... i do not function well enough to spend months#learning that many new skills. I already have a lot of of things I'm good at (not in a braggy way but just factually like.. i already have#a wide variety of different things under my belt).. at some point I have to just be happy with what i CAN already do and focus on that#and admit I need to get outside help sometimes ghjbh... NO more new skills/hobbies!!! ... ANYWAY
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kompenscovery was such a blessed secret entrance to a Whole Deal (winnie n tay. & i guess billions) when like. having the most specific, correct opinions, and being me, = the ideal is [nobody else try to talk to me about winston billions] and that’s just where we’re at. this is an exclusive experience
#talking to myself / making the wisdom Available by nailing my text posts (and drawings) to the church doors but then i walk away#meanwhile also of course the hero who permits [my monologuing abt winston all the more behind the scenes] w/o being sick of it after 9000hrs#i think probably other people talk abt winston but not in ways i'm interested in. Except absolute rando twitter billions viewers#this like 60 or 70 yr old lady from twitter who Loves winston. and presumably through the will roland angle lol she went to bway bmc....#just other one off tweets abt ppl like yeah he's one of my / the fave. um hell yes my scholar#or no wait lmfao like again i'd talk about this w/beth roland in theory lmfao. maybe even also hero & scholar & relevant party william#the niche on niche on niche like. looking into deh As Jared Kleinman Lore. liking an actor's je ne sais quoi & scrambling when finding out#that his upcoming bway role is Thee Lead thank you very much....the dramatic fateful saga that was [ending up watching the then available#clips from billions which was up to kompenso]....finding the peak specific peak titrated peak Exact Enrichment gift lol#beyond that i don't see [media enjoyment / takes] as much of like a springboard for Broader Socializing or anything. it Can be ig but.#that's not the goal & not the expectation. at this point reflecting on Myself & My Experiences & My Heart's Truth lmfao i'm like#beyond [i don't think i'd enjoy A Friend Group in actuality] to [i don't think i'm that interested in Friends] series or concept lol#open to whatever & flexible or whatever but eh. already i like Impersonal & Parallel activity & doing my own thing perhaps amongst others#i like impersonal but amicable spontaneous; fleeting exchanges. doing xyz ''alone'' amongst other people.#i like Not having to people please & i'm autistic so i'm generally gonna be considered [unlikable / impersonable / too much / etc] adhd too#although it's not that specific like it goes for Anything. i don't want ppl to talk to me abt [xyz] lol#request a mini monologue / short essay sure but other than that#this isn't a forum....here's the posts left on the door. one can try the anchorite window or sending a letter. doing my own thing yknow#the secret here is ''i mean i like to talk to people but; i actually in practice tend to not like to talk to people'' lmfao#one can check back when many things are more on my own terms / suited to me but. buffering wheel / flipping hourglass mode
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Thinking thoughts about these guys again
Creepypasta/MH - Things That Make Them Think of You
Characters: Jeff the Killer, Jane the Killer, Clockwork, Nina the Killer, Tim/Masky, "Ticci" Toby
Jeff the Killer
Violence. Specifically, committing it
I know that sounds bad, but he gets so high off of that stuff
The adrenaline rushing through his veins, the wild smile that comes to his face, the noise, the sights... it's euphoria for him
And when he reaches his peak, endorphins at maximum saturation, that's when he thinks of you
It's almost like he subconsciously asks himself if there's anything in the world that could make him happy like this, and his subconscious responds by conjuring an image of you
As if he couldn't get any happier, thinking of you just pushes him higher
This happens a lot...
He'll be killing someone, already over the moon, then he'll blast to Mars when he thinks of you
And he starts associating you with violence; even if you're the gentlest person in the world
It's the happiness it brings him that links it to you
Though if you're a psycho (affectionate) like him, there might be another reason he associates it with you lol
It just gets worse over time; eventually he can't even see other people committing violent acts without thinking of you
He'll be watching a horror movie, and blood will splatter the screen and he'll be like: Nice. Y/n's nice too. Y/n... <3
Jane the Killer
Quite the opposite of Jeff; it's the quiet moments that get her thinking of you
(my reasoning is confusing but I'll try my best to explain T-T)
And there are two reasons for this
One, because whenever she gets a moment to think to herself, her brain always wants to think of you first
Maybe it's just hunting that hit of dopamine it gets when she imagines your smile, or the way your hands feel in hers...
Or maybe it's just that it's become a habit for her to think of you so often, so it's second-nature that she does so when she gets the chance
But the second reason is that she loves peace, and you are her peace :)
She's a vengeful person with a lot of turmoil inside, so when her environment is peaceful, she tries to follow suit
She's just taking what she can get before she has to go back to hate and obsession
So she imagines the peaceful things in her life
Namely, you
Even if you're not a very peaceful person, she feels at ease when she's with you
So, when it's quiet, she thinks of you to quiet herself
Memories of forehead touches and holding hands are more than enough to fill the silence :)
Clockwork
Literally everything.
I’ve mentioned this in a previous post, but Clockwork will find the most random things that remind her of you
She’s got a very creative mind; she can find the subtlest of things that make her think of you
Oftentimes they’ll be disturbing things…. Like a dead animal or smth
But she gets a little smile when she thinks of you anyway :)
She’ll probably send you a picture of whatever it was that reminded her of you
So you’ll just get a text out of nowhere like:
[picture of a dead wasp] “thought of you <3”
After a while you’ll learn to just not ask
Because you’ll definitely get one of these texts AT LEAST every other day, if not every day
Sometimes they’re actually nice things though! Like a song or a pretty sunset :)
Or something she saw while shopping that made her think of you; she always makes sure to steal …obtain those things
And ofc she gifts them to you 😌
Nina the Killer
I think it depends on your aesthetic
To me, Nina is someone who’s very in tune with aesthetics
Even if yours is super niche, or it doesn’t fit under a specific category like “emo” or “butch” or even “clowncore,” she’s got it DOWN
And so it’s always things that fit your aesthetic that make her think of you
Maybe it’s a view: a dark forest, a bright sunset in your favorite color, a sunny park, an eerily empty sidewalk…
Maybe it’s clothing: pants, shirts, dresses, jackets… always the exact kind of thing you’d wear :)
Maybe it’s music: she listens to music like. All the time. So she’s definitely at least dipped her toes into a genre that’s so totally you
Or maybe it’s something miscellaneous: a pop tart flavor, a blanket, a picture, the color on a soda dispenser…
No matter what it is, you’re guaranteed to love it
She always manages to surprise you with yet another random thing perfectly suited to your aesthetic
And she’s always on the hunt for more >;)
If it’s something she can physically bring to you, you best believe she will though
And if you decide you hate it (you won’t, but maybe later when your aesthetic changes), you guys light a bonfire and burn it together :)
Tim/Masky
It’s a Polaroid picture of you
He’s not in the picture; it’s just you
The flash is on, illuminating you and leaving the background in dark obscurity
He took it himself one night when he was just enamored with the way you looked
He did it casually, just telling you to look at the camera
The rest was all you; maybe you smiled, maybe you threw up a peace sign…
Whatever you did, he felt it captured your essence perfectly
He stared at the photo for a long time after it came out, and he still stares at it frequently
He carries it deep in his wallet where no one can find it
He’ll pull it out when he needs to think of you, usually when he’s especially down
Which is pretty often, my boy is troubled :(
He’ll trace his fingers around the edges, remembering that night
Your voice fills his ears, your scent fills his nose, and suddenly he’s aching to see you in person again
And he will; he’ll probably call or text you soon :)
“Ticci” Toby
Honestly? Probably something super obscure related to some kind of inside joke between you two
I’ll paint an example
Maybe you two were in the kitchen together, and you wanted him to get out the milk for you
But you ended up calling it a “mug of jilk” instead of a “jug of milk”
Toby, of course, bursts into laughter
He teases you for ages afterwards, calling milk “jilk” and always pointing out jugs of milk with a knowing grin
You’re in on it too though
You always snicker whenever he does those things
Maybe that’s why it becomes so special to him; it amuses the both of you
He gets to laugh and hear you laugh :D
So (in this case) he’ll think of you whenever he sees a mug of j (oh gosh oh no you guys got me too) jug of milk
And he probably takes pictures to send you too
You’ll just get a text that says “jilk mugs spotted ‼️” and a picture of the milk aisle at the grocery store
He likes to imagine your laugh when he sends texts like those :)
Thank you so much for reading!! Take care my lovey doves <33
(divider by saradika)
#creepypasta#creepypasta x reader#creepypasta headcanons#marble hornets x reader#jeff the killer#jeff the killer x reader#jane the killer#jane the killer x reader#nina the killer#nina the killer x reader#tim wright#tim wright x reader#masky x reader#ticci toby#ticci toby x reader#tobias rogers x reader#clockwork#clockwork x reader
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“What was that for?”
Some more thoughts on Darlin’s love languages and Sam’s HBS. Part 2 headcanons yay!
@darlin-collins <3
Darlin feels like they are never close enough to Sam, they will be laid directly on top of him and still trying to figure out ways to get closer
Sam, although quite outwardly stoic, does not only use his ‘pretty prose’ on Darlin’ (although they get the most and the best ones). Since his turning he is so aware of how short life can be and when he truly admires something about a person he’ll let them know.
This is usually with close pack/clan and also always when he’s just on his own with the person he’s talking too. But, if the timings right, he lets out these poetic observations, usually leaving the other person speechless before he quickly changes the topic. Not always realising the (positive) weight of his compliments.
On multiple occasions Sam has used words to describe Darlin that they didn’t know. Not because they’re dumb but because some of his vocabulary is rather niche. And upon looking it up they almost always perfectly describe Darlin’ in whatever situation he was talking about.
Although not the best at giving compliments, Darlin’ does tell Sam that he’s beautiful, gorgeous etc depending on the vibe he’s giving at the time and they’re the first person to ever call him anything other than handsome or hot.
‘You’re so pretty’
‘Pretty?!?’
‘Mhmm’
‘Darlin’ I ain’t-‘
‘Especially right now, with your hair like that’
‘Alright…. Well, thank you.’
I’ve mentioned before in a head canon post that they like it when Sam runs a finger up and down the bridge of their nose. Darlin’ will also full on nuzzle into Sam when cuddling/hugging. Especially into his collarbone/neck
Although comfortable with (platonic) touch from people they know, Darlin doesn’t like it unexpectedly, nor will they usually initiate it.
Unless someone they love is upset, then they’ll be getting a hug or an arm wrapped around them without any hesitation (if that’s what they like ofc)
Sam feels like he’ll never be able to fully voice how much Darlin’ means to him, Darlin’s heart practically skips a beat when he simply calls them beautiful. (Or when he makes a joke or complains or laughs or….)
When comforting Darlin’ about something, Sam often adresses problems/reasons for their behaviour/feelings that Darlin’ hadn’t realised themselves yet. He is so careful with his wording and extremely observant of them.
Darlin’ although previously independent to a fault, realised that the best comfort they could give Sam was to let him help them. On multiple occasions Darlin’ has let him heal paper-cuts and small bruises (which is a ridiculous waste of magic in their opinion) because otherwise he’s not going to stop thinking about it.
Sam knows all of Darlin’s tells by their body language and Darlin’ know Sam’s by his tone and the amount he’s speaking for example: if he says he’s ‘fine’ then he’s not but if he says he’s ‘alright’ then he probably is
The same way Sam felt bad about not being able to give Darlin every physical action that they wanted Darlin feels bad that they can’t verbalise their feelings for him correctly.
Sam found a scrunched up love letter from Darlin’ and keeps it in his wallet. They’d wanted to write down their feelings so they wouldn’t mess it up when sharing them with him but ultimately hated the end result.
They do however leave little notes for him sometimes while he’s sleeping , since they tend to work on different schedules, that Sam also dearly treasures and keeps in a shoe box.
Sam is really good at writing professional emails and has on multiple occasions written some for Angel and Babe when they’ve had problems with their bosses
The perfect mix of polite, professional and passive aggressive
Another way Darlin’ helps Sam is by reminding him of his talents/abilities and how he uses them for so much good, they will not let that man be humble. His #1 cheerleader FR.
Even with all of this in mind both of their most comfortable ways of communicating their love is through acts of service. That way they get to keep up their grumpy outward personas that the pack/clan have long since learned to see right through.
#can’t believe I went so long without rambling about them but the ramble are back baby#mainly Sam and Darlin#but I’ll probably make another post at some point with more of the pack involved#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redactedverse#redacted sam#redacted darlin#redacted shaw pack#arrowsqueue#redacted headcanons
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John "Soap" MacTavish Headcannons
This man can SPRINT in heels I will die on this hill
If it wasn't for the military, he'd sleep until noon
Probably work a nightshift too
He needs coffee to function, if he doesn't have coffee he's a grouch
Takes his time waking up, not an early bird
He needs like five alarms to wake up
Bathroom first kind of person
Sometimes takes a shower in the morning, depends on if he didn't the night before
COFFEE and juice
Sweet tooth, a horrible sweet tooth
Chocolate chip pancakes are his go to, or whatever the canteen has tbh he's not that picky
He sleeps in whatever, or just his boxers does not care-
He does not dress up, he's in a uniform and looks presentable 9/10 out of ten. He's in a t-shirt and sweats when he's not deployed
Takes a shower every night, sometimes multiple times in the same night if he still feels grimey after the first one
He doesn't take baths often, but when he does it has bubbles and a rubber duckie. He likes the simple things in life guys
He likes simple scents, nothing complex
He hates 3-in-1
He likes Mint toothpaste
He eats when he can, but has pocket snacks
He loves home cooked meals
He likes smoothies, the purple ones (that he can never remember the name of) he gets from a smoothie shop are his favorites
He never makes meals for later, he's not that organized-
Rarely has leftovers
Get's fast food once in a blue moon
Doesn't eat out much, unless it's a special occasion
He does most of the chores, he has a specific way he does things
DESPISES dishes, hates the feeling of the food being squishy and soft under his fingers
IMMEDIATELY washes dishes after using them
Does have a "laundry chair" but it doesn't last long tbh
Makes his bed in the morning, military taught him well
Has a car, but that's about it
Owns a car, but it's this little puddle hopper and it's beat up- He could afford a better car, but he's deployed a lot so he probably won't buy one
He literally takes his car through the biggest puddles ever, just to see the water arch. He's easily amused
Hates boats, especially after Graves
He has an Android
Special ringtones for everyone he cares about
He has it silenced 9/10, he silences it for missions and forgets to unsilence it
He has candy-crush on his phone and I will stand firm on this
He has the basic lock and home screens
He has snapchat but uses it for the filters, also has facebook for market place and Tiktok for the car videos
He has a few followers on Tiktok
He can block someone easy
He posts his cooking fails online
He probably has angered the baking/cooking niche online A LOT, dude probably has callouts from five years ago because he doesn't care-
He sleeps whenever, but totally has sleeping meds for his PTSD
He can either be up all night or in seconds, depends on how tired he is tbh
He's a light sleeper
He talks in his sleep, but it's mostly mumbles
Has nightmares more often than not
Has a bit of light from his TV, finds it hard to sleep without it
Sleeps with every window and door locked
Has his bed in the corner of the wall, hard to be attacked from both sides
His handwritting is damn near impossible to understand, sometimes Price has a hard time deciphering it
He's an outdoorsy type
The first memory is of being with him mom at a fair
He likes bread, just bread ;-;
He listens to literally everything, except classical it puts him to sleep
Very Artsy
He has Bachlers degree
He loves cats, and has one at his moms
Struggles with gifts tbh
He went from the tallest in his family, to the one of the shortest on his team
He's huge on physical touch, especially with his partner
He said something that made Ghost stop in his tracks once, and then ever did again. It was so stupid it was smart
Soap is so fucking sociable it honestly annoys Ghost
He really wants to get married, but doesn't want to put the stress of him always being deployed on his spouse and he doesn't want to die on them
He's allergic to Buckwheat, Shellfish, Balsam of Peru, Tegretol, and Cosmetics
Whenever something traumatic happens he shrugs and goes: "Well that happened" and goes on with his life
He has a lot of scars, mostly from war itself most of them are on his upper arms but some are on his chest and forearms
He has a scar from getting a gash on his leg when playing when he was a kid, he needed A LOT of stitches
He has one that looks like a cresant moon on his right hand ring finger
He honestly doesn't mind when people trace his scars, it's kinda soothing
A little kid once asked about one on his chest, which he got when a bomb went on prematurely, and he said he got it from a T-Rex to entertain the kid.
That was also when he decided he wanted kids, when the kids eyes blew open wide and they bounced on their toes asking more questions. Which he provided absurd answers until the kids mom rushed over and apologized
The one on his chest was from a near-death experience, learned really quick how to run really really fast
He holds his partner close during cuddling, if their back is against his chest his face in buried in their neck. If he's laying on top of them, he has his head against their stomach and his arms protectively around their waist, or if his head is on his lap he just gently holds them and usually falls asleep
He's close with all of his family but is 1n00% a momma's boy
He stims by making faces, which is slightly weird if you don't know him wel
#soap#Soap#soap cod#soap mw2#john soap mactavish#soap mactavish#johnny soap mactavish#soap call of duty#soap mctavish#soap mw3#141#simon ghost riley#john soap mctavish#Soap headcanons#john mactavish#johnny mactavish#Johnny Mactavish headcanons
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I want to ship SC, trust me I do and I love them together, but I just can’t fathom how far they stretch a fake relationship (her and T). Like for example the recent picture of them holding hands- now it’s not an insane gesture but definitely one we haven’t seen before. So maybe they truly are just a private couple. But in my heart of hearts I just love her and S together so much, and don’t know what to think because on one hand they are simply everything together and on the other it seems like she really is with T. I’m confused 🥲 what’s your take?
Dear Confused Anon,
I will be brutally honest: no, I do not trust you and I do not care about your crocodile tears. Not a single bit. In fact, once I will be done with my answer to you, you are most probably going to press CTRL+C, then CTRL +V. And run to the nearest Mordor sweatshop, in the hope one of the Three Sopranos will insult me again.
You see, to trust you, I would have to speak with at least a handle, not a coward in disguise. And then, even DMs are neither always safe, nor always honest - I have recently learned it the rough way, despite my best efforts, tried (and up until now failed) to forgive and will never forget.
By now, I suppose everyone got a good look at this splendiferous picture:
Take a long, quiet, hard look at it, Shire.
So organic it could kill a moth colony on the spot.
So heartfelt - she doesn't even look at him.
So sentimental - that icy smile of hers. A happy couple, indeed.
A general round of applause, all across the Nation.
You are very wrong: it is not the first time they are holding hands, I mean, sort of. The much touted London marathon pic immediately comes to mind - although you'd have to admit, I looked and looked and he seemed to be checking her pulse, rather than being lovey-dovey.
A real private couple would never stoop as low as a cheap, laborious retcon, in retaliation for a couple of thousand people speculating on a niche blogging platform.
It took four years, a month and four days after that Remarkable Week-end to see McSideburns clumsily try and claw her hand. Remarkable, indeed.
And are you trying to tell me the MC didn't shake your beliefs and this does?
This perfunctory, formulaic, scripted AF, blip?
Wow. I have no words, Anon.
That unkempt, bland person - for God's sake, mister, tuck that damn shirt in your pants! - looking like the elephant in the china shop at a carefully curated event celebrating the supreme form of French refinement?
This is insulting, to say the least. To her (and her prized image), to Chanel, to this fandom, to S and believe it or not, to himself, too. Granted, the Berluti shoes are showing some improvement and are now clean. Hmph.
So here is what I think, Anon (and I know people are going to shriek and guess what, I do not care, for once):
It's been at least one year this fandom has been asking for this specific pic and for this specific whiplash. A childish tantrum, as she is regularly throwing. Mind you, that doesn't even come close to the painfully slow, monumentally boring Flukenzie Floozy Saga and looks as staged as the Ochoa & S London sighting (ah, patterns!).
This is the reaction to our scriptwriting ineptitude.
This is also the reaction to some underground shenanigans, directly related to a birth certificate apparently being peddled around. I will not discuss this, yet know just that: this is a legal claptrap, right there. I can, and if needed I will prove it. With the cold, surgical precision Mordor is so afraid of.
But she is a mother, for Christ's sake!
A mother!
As I said, I am not a mother and never will be. I do not wish this trial on anyone. But if I know something about life, I can guarantee you a mother would do whatever it takes to protect her child(ren).
Including taking precisely this kind of sad and forgettable pic.
So, there's that. We choose and we choose now: we fall for it once more and let the playbook fiddle with our insecurities once more and post endless trails of old pics once more to soothe the searing indignation.... Or GROW THE FUCK UP and show to whom it may concern we're not buying this shit anymore.
I know what I'll do. You're on your own, Anon: my tough love took you only this far, down the road. Sorry for the length. It was needed.
For the moment, I just booked an appointment with Miss Fotoula (roughly Claire, hehe), my genius hairdresser. I will ask her to refresh my dirty blonde mane.
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A Peek to My SFS Stats
I know some creators prefer not seeing their download numbers and that's fair! This kind of stuff can easily cause pressure and/or feelings of underachievement.
For me though, it's just statistics. And since it's pretty precisely 5 years from when I first uploaded anything to SFS, I've gathered some data to play with.
So, this very self-indulgent post is solely about my SFS stats. Just because I'm a total nerd I find it interesting, and I like being open about things. It's long and blabbery so the rest is safely under the cut.
For the background: I tend to create whatever I need for my own game. I share my weird stuff because I feel like it's a trade for everything I download from others.
Probably due to the lack of any consistency or branding at all, my CC has a wide range in download numbers. I have some popular pieces, sure, but also some niche mods like no snow accumulation that has only interested 126 persons in nearly two years.
Even though saying "only 126" is an illusion created by the internet. Imagine if those 126 individuals would come to you in person. That's more people than I've probably even had a real talk with during the last year!
The raw data of my SFS main folder is (calculated with a sheets program): it has 227 files and the average download count for each file is 1557, but 74% of the files have been downloaded fewer times than the average.
So even though my CC isn't usually downloaded that much, I've shared a handful of things that have been downloaded so much more than everything else that they pull the average up.
What are those things? Time is an important factor here, as most CC tends to gather downloads over time (not a single post from 2023 on this list).
1) Subtle wrinkles (January 2022)
17313 downloads (674 hearts; ~3,9% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 1112
That's several thousand more than the second most downloaded thing I have, and it's such a random thing.
I'm sure most people have downloaded them to get those 4t2(ish) forehead wrinkles. I have no other explanation as the rest of them are hand-drawn by a person who can't draw. Also the preview is frankly hideous, I used about one minute to take it... safe to say I didn't expect this post to gather any attention at all.
2) Cellphone default (January 2021)
13547 downloads (565 hearts; ~4,2% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 1133
Noteworthy that it's been updated a couple of times which pushes people to redownload.
This was a quick passion project, since at that time I couldn't find a cellphone default I was completely happy with. If it hadn't been a quickie, I would've used more time to find a good base mesh oof. Many thanks to @pforestsims for later improving it.
3) Tombstone defaults (December 2019)
12477 downloads (582 hearts; ~4,7% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 1064
I was so proud of these when I made them. Those were my first mesh defaults ever! Today, I'm proud of my past self for doing them. That's crazy many meshes and subsets to handle for a total noob.
I couldn't do anything with BHAVs back then, so those defaults would've never ever happened without @midgethetree. She endured a lot, working with a noob who went through several meltdowns because of subset issues that didn't make any sense.
4) Baby personality mod (February 2020)
9724 downloads (489 hearts; ~5% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 1193
The first mod on the list! Absolutely essential one for myself and apparently for some others too.
Also the actual first mod of my own ever. I can't really recommend starting with something this complicated, I had zero ability to perceive the scope of the mod when I asked if @midgethetree was willing to help me through it. She deserves all the praise for doing it, I've realized later that I couldn't ever teach anyone the way she taught me. So, if you read this: thank you, Midge.
5) Rabbit pen default (August 2022)
9628 downloads (442 hearts; ~4,6% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 1305
This was completely @deedee-sims' idea and project! I just hopped in (hah) to help. I'm only hosting it for practicality, as the BHAVs most often need updating, and those are by me.
6) Turn On/Off replacements (July 2021)
8644 downloads (388 hearts; ~4,5% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 1470
This post has more notes than any other post of mine, yet it's not even nearly the most downloaded thing I've done. The two don't always go hand in hand.
I've also shared an updated version of these lately in a new post. It's unlikely they'll get the same amount of attention, which on paper doesn't make much sense since it's practically the same thing but done better. But I'm sure everyone knows that the hype and the quality don't always match.
7) Pixelry’s KKB fridge recolors (February 2022)
8147 downloads (329 hearts; ~4% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 662
This is such an oddity on this list since it's the only recolor set and the post has fewer notes than the other ones, too. People just (secretly) really like cute fridges, apparently.
8) Crib teeth anim fix (August 2022)
6157 downloads (431 hearts; ~7% of all downloaders)
Post notes: 1408
This list is already long enough, but I wanted to show how fast the number starts dropping at this point.
This got posted a day before the bunnies, and I find it funny to think that for about 3000 people it's more pressing to have bunnies in their game than fixing their toddlers dropping teeth while crying lol.
No point in continuing the list forever, but among my most note-gaining Tumblr posts are also:
Puppy/kitten want replacements
(October 2022, 1114 notes, 3849 downloads)
Improved biotech station
(July 2022, 1110 notes, 3893 downloads)
Camera overhaul mod
(January 2024, 1059 notes, 1752 downloads)
Newspaper default
(March 2022, 970 notes, 5052 downloads)
While I don't have a real conclusion to offer, it's clear that notes don't always get realized to downloads, and likewise many people download without interacting with posts.
One more thing I'd like to point out is that the percentage of people who hit that SFS heart button seems pretty constant. I feel like it shows that some people just have that habit and some don't, and it's not likely directly related to how much they like the thing.
The amount of SFS hearts that crib teeth anim fix has gotten doesn't follow this pattern lol. It's really not common to see the percentage change even that much.
#text#text post#random#nerdy stuff#this is what happens when i start typing without thinking#i end up with a novel#that probably interests no one lol
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just saw ur caste dating discourse post and realized meulin would've been lambasted by all of those groups for getting w the 2 highest landdwelling castes. kankri would write her callout post. feferi would've been accused of coercing sollux to be w her etc etc
girl would be in the TRENCHES fighting off the waves of terminally online freaks kankri keeps sending her way,, someone save her
genuinely i dont think a single beta troll wouldve made it through the discourse unscathed LMAO
aradia? well clearly shes only with sollux because he could easily kill her w/ his psiionics (god help them if the grumblr mob ever finds out that he *did* technically do that one time)
tavros is held up as like the posterchild for why lowbloods and highbloods shouldnt be in quadrants even though he and vriska were uh. never in a quad together. does he try *telling* anyone that? probably not!
sollux? psiionics. threatening aradia into a quad. (also tbh getting into a quad with someone when youre a goldblood is lowkey problematic because what are they supposed to do after you're sent offplanet and helmed? its honestly really manipulative holding someones quad hostage only to leave them forever which is why all golds should take a vow of celibacy-) hes only making it worse by being an absolute dick to everyone involved and escalating shit so far that theres multiple attempts on his life and everyones *convinced* hes a serial manipulating asshole because lmao why would he tell those idiots theyre wrong
karkat? you mean that hemoanon freak thats probably just a highblood trying to pass himself off as a lower caste so he can manipulate lowbloods into his quads?
nepeta and equius would be torn APART - not only is he three castes higher than her, but hes also far physically stronger so clearly shes the weak defenseless victim here (they keep saying this even after she culls someone for it. nep im so sorry)
kanaya shouldnt even *be* in a quad since shes a jade and theyre meant to be sequestered (similar argument to golds where actually its really cruel and manipulative to be in a quad with someone when you know you two are going to be forced to be apart for sweeps - no they dont care that she left the caverns. she still shouldnt be doing that shit its a bad example for other jades smh)
terezis honestly the most divided because her relationships are either her and karkat (potential highblood, terezi might be victim *or* karkat is a lowblood and shes the one with power over him) or her and vriska (no one wants to know whats going on there). although tbh she is a lawyer which means she can get her quads tried and killed for whatever bullshit crime she can come up with if they try to leave :/ never date a cop lawyer folks
vriska. mind control. do i need to say more. every vriska relationship is toxic and awful and she wouldve been cancelled 50 times over if the ringleaders of her callout posts didnt mysteriously 'deactivate'
equius. too strong to date - how can you be in a quad with someone that not only has a shit ton of social power over you, but also could literally tear you apart if he wanted to. also lowkey problematic for making and fighting/kissing (??? its unclear online and no one wants to know) robots :/ like those are clearly stand ins for lowbloods that hes attacking/potentially fetishising and they literally have to do everything he says thats fucked up
gamzee. highblood. automatic oppressor. part of a niche religion - if you try to quad him you either have to convert (cultural (caste?) appropriation) or dont become part of the clurch (rude, disrespecting his beliefs). constant discourse about whether clowns can even consent to a quad because theyre presumably high all the time as part of their religious practices. constant discourse about how assuming clowns are high all the time as part of their religious practices is casteist as fuck.
eridan. somehow one of the least problematic trolls out of the group (which is saying a fucking LOT). only has quads with someone a caste higher than him (although that caste is fuschia. is he the victim here??). pursues lowbloods constantly though which is problematic as fuck (at least he doesnt kill them if they turn him down. the bar is on the fucking floor)
feferi. god forbid a woman do anything. pale with eridan? sure hes only a caste lower than her but also shes the literal fucking heiress - what was he gonna do, say no? he cant even hide in the ocean from her!! shes a seadweller too!! flushed with sollux? holy shit hes like 8 castes lower than her of fucking course he had to say yes! shes probably only dating him so she can helm him later anyway :/ really its problematic as shit for her to even have friendships with trolls of other castes because shes just using them without giving them the benefits of being in a quad (shes the literal heiress of course shes going to get whatever she wants from them) - but also if she stayed distant and didnt talk to anyone then shed be accused of being full of herself and thinking she was better than anyone else and #NotMyHeiress
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hey sorry i’m sure it’s a little dumb but how did you find a community/make mutuals on here? i swapped from twitter to here last year & haven’t been able to make friends like i did on twitter ;v; sorry if this is all silly but figured it couldn’t hurt to ask. love your art & blog !!!
as i like to say, it's like lifting an anvil: it's very simple, but that doesn't mean it's easy. as someone who's a 12+ year veteran that lurked for a couple years and remade a little while ago, really it all comes down to putting yourself out there!!! don't just sit around twiddling your thumbs and lurking. it's tough to do it without coming off as a pandering tryhard, but honestly as long as you're polite, upbeat, and posting regularly, then you're golden.
if you want a big list of wordy bullet points, here's what i've got, and i think you'll find it's pretty applicable to basically any site/community you want to get involved in:
post a lot. this is number one with a fucking bullet! POST! POST LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT. but crucially...
post GOOD STUFF. don't bash yourself in the caption/tags, don't say "sorry this is shit" or whatever, don't self-deprecate, and don't admit to posting low-effort stuff just to hit a quota. imagine it's open mic night and go crazy. this is a good site to use like a journal and a scrapbook, but if you want to actually get some traction, you need to bring something interesting to the table. of course, just being funny and nice goes a very long way.
encourage audience feedback. people LOVE to tell you about themselves and give their opinions. get them responding and make the questions and calls for engagement so interesting or fun they can't help themselves.
tag effectively. use both fandom/content tags for searches, and organizational tags for your visitors' use. the tagging system is tumblr's bread and butter, so make it work for you.
follow a lot of blogs you like. then see who they follow, and add those to the list. build a good circle of engagement and keep your finger on the pulse of the site culture for whatever niche(s) you're in... or want to get in.
reblog a lot and be funny/kind in the tags. generally leaving a lot of comments/replies to post is kind of hit-or-miss, but tags are a good harmless "inside voice" to use that doesn't clutter the post itself and yet still engages with op and people seeing the post
engage with people when they ask for engagement. things like polls, ask games, etc... scratch people's backs and they'll scratch yours. and it's just a nice thing to do regardless :)
panhandling is not always the best route. people will balk if you look desperate or openly beg for engagement, like directly asking people to reblog something or being passive-aggressive about how much engagement you are/aren't getting on something. a genuine joke about it is fun and relatable, but snarky comments just kill the vibe and scare people off.
REMEMBER THERE'S NO ALGORITHM. lurking will not put you or any of the stuff you like out there!! REBLOG POSTS! SEND ASKS! this site will NOT SPOON FEED YOU ANYTHING. like taming a wild stallion, you can make this work for you, but you have to put in the effort first.
some people will think you're annoying, and that's okay. probably not very many, but they'll be loud. this is an unavoidable part of Being Known. you can be the sweetest peach in the world but there'll still be people who just don't like peaches. don't take it to heart, and if you do happen to drop the ball or rub a few people the wrong way, don't let that keep you from trying again :)
i've enjoyed the many friends i've made on this site in the past decade-and-then-some, even though both this site and my blog are both something of a ship of theseus. here's hoping you can make it work for you and your interests, too!
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I think there’s a definite problem though with the amount of art and fics being HEAVILY Astarion with cis women. That reeks of his queerness being erased. There should be a healthy balance of Astarion with different partners, but the “default” in the fandom is always him with a woman. As a gay man it’s very frustrating.
Okay so. in however much any of this matters. 1. Shoving this under a cut for people who are tired of seeing the discourse (I am too, I tend to scroll really really fast past it.) 2. I know the fandom discourse machine looooves super firm and snarky opinion jabs summed up in 169 words or less but I am literally incapable of not elaborating so. sorry YOU asked. since it’s also probably relevant, Im coming at this with the Mega Dyke with the fuck around and find out perspective irt my life experiences and queerness. I don’t generally care about niche queer internet discourse and I don’t generally care about fandom discourse, so you can tell how bored I am at work rn that I’m deep diving into this. tldr yeah you’re not wrong I agree that astarion’s queerness is erased in certain spaces but that has nothing to do with being attracted to women. my funny hot take is once again that astarion is a he/him evil femme to me so. let’s MOVE.
I received the second one within the first few minutes of the first, and I’m goingggg to proceed on good faith and with the idea that I think we’re all in agreement for the most part, because I think we are. But I’m going to address the most obvious thing that. I don’t really…. think is necessarily the point in this. first of all, I empathize that it suuuucks to not see as many works made for your main pairing of choice (there’s generally a deficit for literally everyone BUT astarion to boot too.) however ultimately fanworks are exactly that: fanworks, and they’re made For Free and posted by a Fan Author who has done this As A Hobby, “a problem nobody is addressing” in this context is……. you are one google doc and keyboard away from writing what you want to see in the world. or, I don’t know. encourage + comment + follow up on fic authors that write what you enjoy. fic is not paid content and the fic authors in bg3 are writing for themselves and what they put out, that they wrote for FREE, is up to them. I once again empathize with not seeing as much of a specific thing as you would like, and I definitely empathize with seeing a popularization of specific characterization that makes you want to scream, cry, throw up, etc. which brings me to what I can actually comment on and critique here. (general note: if you proceed to misread me on the basis of “people can do what they want!!” I assure you. you can do whatever you want forever. I do not care. I am not mad. I am minding my business 90% of the time. do I like domstarion? no. but it is NOT my concern nor my judgement.)
“That reeks of his queerness being erased. There should be a healthy balance of Astarion with different partners, but the “default” in the fandom is always him with a woman.” <- so! now that we have “it’s all for free man idk what you want me to say here” out of the way. we CAN critique something real in this that I do agree with. the sort of…. honestly kind of fascinating (derogatory) trends of what I’ll call Straightifying astarion for lack of a better word.
this brings me to the point I kind of offhandedly made in the previous post, about how there IS nuance to be said on astarion’s queerness getting erased. I do actually agree with you that in some spheres of the bg3 fandom, his queerness has been heavily sanitized and he’s become something of a placeholder for Sexy Vampire Boyfriend romance tropes. he’s mostly there to be a stand-in for a sexy dom vampire man; MANY of his complex character traits that have literally Nothing to do with romance have been basically entirely removed to serve a specific idealized idea of him that suit the scene. it’s frustrating! I find it frustrating. I also agree that within this specific Brand of Mischaracterized Astarion, he’s been so……….. reduced down to this that his more overt queerness is basically entirely removed. however, the issue is not that he’s with a woman in this? the issue is that the writer is not incorporating a sort of.. overarching queer lens, for lack of a better term, to the characterization they’ve got going on. you can write whatever you want forever, but it’s not written in a vacuum, I agree.
Since these are all popular straight romance tropes, he falls directly into the pit of Sexy Man (straight) very quickly, and his attraction toward others (let alone, good god, his complex relationship to sex, sexuality, desire? good fucking luck finding something thoughtful in there about that) tends to fall by the wayside as a result. It is what you would expect but it’s not without room for critique in what I think we’re aligned on; which is seeing astarion’s queerness erased is maddeninggg. And it is EXTREMELY frustrating to see if you’re someone like me, or possibly yourself, who’s into 1. really analyzing characterization and 2. really into exploring queer dynamics in writing + lit + media many different formats. THIS—the sanitization, the removal of astarion’s queerness—this is what is irksome as a queer reader.
however. the issue I’m seeing is that ^^^^^ this brand of mischaracterization is 1. being conflated with simply that he’s with women, and 2. the frustration of having less content (understandable) is turning into a very WEIRD dialogue in which the extreme of “well actually he wouldn’t even want to fuck women!!” is the stance to take (very weird) (kind of misogynistic) (kind of also reeks of continuing to talk about women as sex objects that astarion would not or would want to fuck) (astarion himself doesn’t even want to fuck for about 90% of his romance so maybe we should talk about that too) — rather than that it would be nice if his queerness would be addressed more openly and with more nuance and clarity than it currently is in That Particular Sphere Of Astarion Characterization. and, of course, the idea that it would be nice if he was portrayed with other kinds of partners! which I agree with and equally appreciate.
but there is no default. literally, there’s no default. what you’re seeing is what people are making of their own tavs, and maybe you would like to see more of another kind, but it doesn’t hold up as an actual fandom critique. what holds up is when we dive into how people write him; how do they write his personality, what traits are being exaggerated and what traits are being ignored; IS his queerness remembered within the text at all? and beyond that, how is that queerness treated when it is written? because I’ve seen the other extreme in which it’s The Homophobic Gay Stereotypes That Maybe We All Agreed At One Point Were Equally Offensive To Exaggerate To The Point Of Horror. half the discussion I see AROUND his queerness amounts to “omg he’s such a slutty flamboyant little fag” but in a quirky haha internet way. very “fruity is a nice alternative to saying queer!” “calling a gay guy fruity in the real world will get you punched out.” vibes in here sometimes and it is EQUALLY weird.
anyways. Astarion’s a multifaceted character which means the first thing everyone did was pick one or two traits to exaggerate and cling to and these color the entire reading of his character rather than taking in the whole. i agree that means his queerness got put to the wayside in some formats of him, and that’s deeply unfortunate + very frustrating. but fanfic is free, so I’m not with you that there’s a Problem That Needs Addressing so much as that’s what people are creating, and you should add to what you want to see in the world.
I’m not going to go on a tangent about how “oh let m/f be a thing!!” because I ALSO agree literally no one needs to be told “m/f is okay to do ❤️” we live in the real world here. and it’s really mindboggling how in some iterations he’s been turned into Straightstarion rather than his CANON QUEERNESS being applicable in every format of every relationship dynamic he could ever possibly be in. However. However. the answer to that is not? acting like the baseline attraction to women is the problem. if the way you’re talking about attraction to women feels rooted in upset about not relating to it and feeling like you’re forced to either relate to it or simply not engage, I do Get It, but at the risk of opening up an entirely different can of worms that needs an entirely different essay to address, gay men are not immune to misogyny and if the language used while talking about women is also objectifying or belittling women to some extent or acting as though attraction to women makes his queerness lesser. newsflash. that is still misogyny (and biphobia). it is not about defending straightness here, it’s entirely that reducing women down to sex objects even in the conversations about not seeing women sexually is alive and well (and repulsive), and that’s what I mean when I say I can hear the “lol I don’t fuck WOMEN that’s DISGUSTING” behind some of the other side of the conversation here. also this is an entirely separate essay but queerness will almost never exist in an easily consumable binary and trying to type him by his character traits is also. kind of weird. just as a thing.
#critical /#this feels like such a I will die on any hill. I am going to forget about this now#like again I’m not even disagreeing with some of you but other things in here. it’s a little bit deeper than that#or as deep as fandom discourse is anyways.#now that the high of soap boxing has worn off as I write these tags I’m like good lord.#I will NOT let inanities ruin this game for me.#sorry that’s once again not really directed at you anon but in general#good faith! we keep good faith!
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The Arcana HCs: M6 on social media
Julian
He is on all the apps, you name it, he probably uses it
He's on theatre kid tiktok
Shamelessly posts thirst traps with niche references
Too many of them are doctor inspired
Perfectly understands the female gaze and takes full advantage of that
Embraces the cringe
Malak regularly photobombs his posts and there are multiple compilations of him fighting off/cussing out a shrieking crow
He canonically has a beautiful singing voice that he does not know how to use, voice coaches love duetting and reacting to him because it is so impressively terrible
He also needs to be carefully monitored though, for two main reasons:
One, all his posts need to be reviewed before he posts them, because he's terrible about internet safety
Two, because everyone gets hate comments and he already has nasty self-esteem issues
Portia gets into so many fights in the comments on her burner account
He is quite popular and has a large and dedicated following
Asra
As much potential as they have for stardom, they are an extremely private person and they are very aware of what kind of place the internet can be
He probably has BeReal and spends most of his time on SnapChat (you know he loves watching drama unfold)
Also has a very aesthetically pleasing Instagram that they forget exists. Scroll through and you'll see random photodumps of all the places they've traveled recently, spaced six months apart
Faust has her own account
He is the type to lurk, never comments, rarely likes, prefers to save something for later to show his friends in person instead of sharing or tagging them
They do love trying out what they see though, like viral pasta recipes and room lighting ideas
Except he'll add his own flashes of creativity as he goes
Sometimes it pays off, like when they got their whole living room to feel like an oasis
Sometimes it doesn't pay off, like when he tried an already sketchy viral food hack and added charcoal
They don't mind integrating social media into in-person situations, if the only thing you have energy for is cuddling up in a pillow pile and scrolling through saved videos together, they're down
Nadia
Facebook and LinkedIn
She's trying her best, she really is, but she has places to be and things to do and she'd rather spend her free time with the people she loves or getting some well-earned rest
The screens also contribute to her headaches
All her sisters are older than her, she has Facebook to keep up with them
She doesn't know that most of them keep with the times enough to have accounts on other platforms as well
She uses LinkedIn for networking, obviously
She does enjoy being entertained though! She loves it when you tilt your phone screen towards her so she can see whatever made you smile or laugh
Regularly asks you or Portia to show her everyone else's most recent posts
Julian's tiktok page is a mystery that never fails to make her laugh
She loves to be included in your posts and is always willing to pose with you for a selfie
She is a fantastic camera woman, she can follow angles and lighting like nobody's business
She does not know how to write captions
Muriel
He doesn't have one until you or Asra sit him down and walk him through the process
He chooses Instagram because he can see cat pictures that way
And because it's the platform most of you guys have an account on, so he can keep tabs on everyone
He has all of his privacy settings enabled
Most of his posts are pictures of Innana or the chickens (mostly the chickens)
No captions, ever
Every now and then someone from the Kokhuri will stumble across his profile and send a message request
He'll wait until you're free to sit with him while he messages them
He's slowly putting a family tree together of the people he's made contact with
Heartily dislikes the reels feature, the constant stimulation puts him on edge
Honestly prefers YouTube, he got a great ad blocker and he watches nature compilations and wilderness survival videos
He also watches videos about wolves so he can take care of Innana better, but he has to be careful when he does that because if the wolf in the video howls she does too
He stumbled across a fan-made compilation of Julian's thirst traps once and refuses to speak about it
Portia
Snapchat for the gossip, Tumblr for all the novels she's become a fan of, and Instagram for Pepi and her garden and baking endeavors
She is on everyone's Snapchat story. If she spots someone new at her workplace she's already sending them a friend request
Tumblr is her guilty pleasure, she has spent hours in the library devouring novels and now she can read and write as much unhinged fanfiction as she wants to
She also loves interacting with other people who enjoy the books and characters she does
Fanart makes her squeal
She hasn't found out about AO3 yet but once she does it's over
Her Instagram is gorgeous. She posts once or twice a day with garden updates, candid shots of Pepi being precious, and baking tips and tricks
Her feed is full of the wanderlust hashtag and it's fueling her bucket list
She has a decently sized following and loves it when people message her
She also has a tiktok burner account to monitor her crazy older brother
Definitely stays on top of all the trends and incorporates them into her Instagram posts
Lucio
He wants to be famous, he really does, but everything he tries flops
Obsessed with tiktok, it's where the young people are
It's also perfect for his limited attention span
Constantly trying to hop on new trends, but always misses the mark ever so slightly
Tried to put the LED light strips up in his bedroom, but he couldn't keep them straight so they're all slightly wonky
Refuses to take them down
He fell down the "alpha male" pipeline once and it took so much work to get him back out, he was insufferable
You got Nadia and Asra to give him a good beat down while you went through his phone and deleted all the accounts that couldn't be saved
You only let him back on when he promised to share his accounts with you, and he agreed on the condition that you help him try to get famous
You suggested he post about the things he knows, like self-defense tactics and survival
He gets a boost when you post a video of him trying and failing to follow a tiktok dance tutorial while he uses increasingly creative language and it goes viral
He's got a small following now and he's so proud of both of you
#the arcana headcanons#the arcana hc#the arcana#asra the arcana#julian the arcana#nadia the arcana#muriel the arcana#portia the arcana#lucio the arcana#the arcana game#the arcana shitpost#asra alnazar#julian devorak#nadia satrinava#muriel of the kokhuri#portia devorak#lucio morgasson
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Please let us be a part of your thoughts about francis childhood! 🥹
To begin, before the haute frogs get on my case for something, as always my takes are historical fiction or even more accurately historical fantasy and is me fitting together as many of my niche interests into a plotline as possible. It's not me slapping some iconoclast label on myself coming to destroy European values or whatever someone's going to put in the box this time. Yes they probably suck, yes I know I'm some uncultured turnip fucking inbred North American peasant. No, I don't really care. Just keep scrolling and let me post one thing about France without getting a six part message in the box.
So in 52 BC, little baby François pops into existence to his 'mother' (I don't do bio parents but they mimic human relationships) Parisii. She's a somewhat more minor figure, existing as a client-kingdom to the larger Senonii. Some dingbat working for a municipal archive mislabelled a coin as having a nymph-like feature on it and I had the absolutely brilliant idea to link maman up there with Mélusine from whom a lot of noble and royal families would claim descent. Rome, Lucius, has taken Greece, Hélène, to wife and wanted to claim François and continue expanding his role as pater familias. The representative of the Arverni or Gaul, whom I'm now thinking of as a somewhat more rugged version of adult François was trying to build a coalition to coparent the world's most high strung child kick out the Romans. But Lucius won, and Papa Gaul spent the rest of his life chugging Roman wine and being bitter. Parisii (really need a name here) and her bouncing baby boy became a favoured mistress and one of Lucius' favourite protégés.
He grows up the quintessential Roman boy. Bright, brutal and pure bonhomme. He's a handsome, fair boy. The spitting image of Arverni/Gaul but sleek and fair. He could throw a spear, recite Homer and picked out the most stylish sandals from Rome. He was perhaps the best debater of all the sons of Rome, a politician and social butterfly.
And he's a bitter disappointment to Arverni. François has always been able to ride a horse, fight and meet the metrics of cultural masculinity but his heart lay in the abstract and artistic. The arts, philosophy. His mother might be getting railed by his stepfather but François doesn't mind at all because Helene is regaling him with stories about Strabo, Plato, and Diogènes. He had a crush on the memory of Alexander the Great. But in all things, he was sociable. All the sunniness of his Mediterranean shore around people. He could charm his way out of the colleseum if he'd needed too. He's a leader in that way the charming and polished those following hardly notice until subjugated are.
#the ask box || probis pateo#francois || temperee par des chansons#I'd rather talk about current events than François because never in my life have i posted without a European francophone ger#get on my case#sigh#maybe posting this in the middle of the night helps
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GUYS A MILESTONE HAS BEEN REACHED
I JUST GOT OFFICIALLY DIAGNOSED WITH AUTISM!! 🎉🎉🥳
I’ve been waiting for this for way too long and I’m so glad it’s official now!! It’s nice to know that other people can see what you’ve suspected all along. Anyways, now that I’m official or whatever, I’m probably going to post about it more often just because I feel better about doing it.
I’d like to thank my psychiatrist, who has never done anything for me aside from filling prescriptions before this moment and likely will not again. And there’s no way I’m letting my mutuals miss out on this awesome moment, so prepare to be mass-tagged.
@fyoliars
@f4ngt4stic
@og-in-a-bog
@paintaya
@pajamasinthetower
@somany-fandoms-solittle-time
@g1oomurai
@localanimeidiot
@cerealmonster15
@veganbread1
@vivislosingitagain
@bisexuawolfsalt
@bewarebugbear
@chuuyxs-husband
@npdidia
@overly-niche-twst
everyone i’ve tagged has made my tumblr experience ten times better by merely existing, regardless of how long we’ve been mutuals. i’m ecstatic that you’re all able to share this with me!
(no need to respond to this if you don’t want to, it just makes me happy to know that you’ve seen it <3)
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Kinktober Day 10(ish) — Sweat, Armpit
Secondo x AFAB!reader
Notes: The first Kinktober post kinda blew up, which I hadn’t expected. So thank you everyone for the support! I hope everyone who’s here enjoys what else I write this month (and after too)! Okay, so I’m kinda cheating on this one. Since it includes stuff that’s from days 5 and 14, I didn’t have it ready by day 5 and I’m planning to post another one on day 13, I thought it’d be best to do it right in between. This makes a nicer, more even schedule. Anyway, can’t believe that this is my first fic with my dearest Bone Daddy (even though I had him in mind for this and began writing the fic for day 13 multiple months ago, which also includes him). I’m not expecting this to get as much attention as day 6 bc it’s more niche but I’m pretty proud of this one so I hope you give it a chance and someone ends up liking it. If I’m lucky, maybe it gives someone a new kink (the ultimate accomplishment in life).
Tags: SMUT (18+ MDNI), sweat and armpit kink (for real, there’s licking of sweaty hairy man pits), vaginal fingering (there's only like one sentence), p in v sex, unprotected sex, pet play adjacent? (idk, he calls reader 'pet' and reader acts a little feral), overstimulation (just a smidge), it got a little soft at the end oops
Word count: 2.3k
ao3
You’re walking to the abbey gym after a long day of sitting at your desk. Your body aches in all the worst ways and you’re intent on changing that. Despite your tired state, you know that once you get into the rhythm of your workout, you will be able to get out of your head and relieve some tension. You don’t think you’ve ever gone quite so late, usually heading there after office hours. But today you had to stay until such a ridiculous time that the corridors are now completely empty. You don’t see a single soul as you walk. For a second, you are worried that the gym will be closed when you arrive. There isn’t any staff there and you need a keycard to enter, but maybe they cut the power off at a certain time. Either way, you would have to go there to find out, so you prepare yourself for disappointment if the worst case scenario is true.
When you finally arrive at the door, you’re glad to find the entry hall looking the same as always. There is no information that would indicate a closing time, so you proceed with your usual routine. There is no one in the changing room or the main gym area itself, just like in the hallways outside. Once you’re changed and ready to start, you put your earbuds in and play your exercise mix. You let yourself feel the high tempo music, pumping yourself up through the warm up. The feeling of your heart beating, skin heating up, breath quickening, all remind you of how real your body is. An intricate machine with millions of processes going on at every second of your life that all seem to fade into the background when you stay unmoving for hours. All that there is is what’s in front of you and you’re not there. Just thoughts swirling around about whatever it is you’re doing, or supposed to be doing, or something else entirely. But never thoughts of how your back is twisting, or stomach grumbling, or eyes stinging. You can feel your body now, and it is the only thing that matters.
Suddenly, you see something moving out of the corner of your eye. You snap your head in that direction, jumping a little out of fear, but you see it’s only someone entering the gym. It is no other than Papa Emeritus II. Wearing a tank top and shorts in his signature green and black, he looks so different than usual. But certainly not bad. A glance at his arm tattoos causes images to flash in your head. Images of tracing them with your fingers, finding all the details you could in the dim light. You wonder if he remembers. Probably not.
You notice him nod his head to greet you and snap out of your thoughts. You return the gesture and force your gaze away from him. Just don’t stare, look anywhere else, you think to yourself, but your eyes refuse to lock on anything. Instead, you scan everything in your field of vision aimlessly, snapping back to him every second or so. Your eyelids close, you take a few deep breaths to center yourself, and when they open back up, you pick a spot and stare at it.
You keep doing your regular workout but your thoughts and eyes keep drifting to Secondo. His muscles straining, his chest heaving, the beads of sweat running down his forehead. You imagine you’re the reason for those, and not the weights in his hands. Fuck, you were supposed to focus on your body, not his. Stop being such a creep, you idiot. He can definitely tell. Your curiosity wins the battle with your will, though, and you look in his direction once again. And what you see nearly knocks you on your ass. His chest is completely bare, the tank top discarded somewhere to the side. His skin glitters with moisture in between the coarse hair. He seems busy enough that your blatant gawking just might go unnoticed. Unlikely, but possible.
When you’re finally done, you quickly tidy up your space and get back to the changing room. You decide to forgo the shower and plan to take it back in your room, changing into your regular clothes for now. Your only choices are to run away or go back in before Secondo leaves. But you have to come up to him. You don't want him to think you're avoiding him. After all, you're not complete strangers. Maybe you still have a chance with him. You inhale a deep calming breath and stand up to walk back inside.
You take slow steps in his direction, where he is leisurely cleaning up.
"I bet there's usually no one here when you come, right?" you speak loudly to get his attention.
"That is correct," he responds while continuing with his task.
"Sorry to disturb your alone time."
He turns around to face you and steps closer.
"It is no problem. I enjoyed the company."
As he's talking, you inhale his scent, pungent and musky and overwhelming, and you do your best to hide your pleased reaction.
“I am sorry, I smell,” he says, clearly noticing your odd behavior.
“No, no, no! Don’t worry, it doesn’t bother me!”
“Oh, you don’t have to be polite.”
“No, really! I mean it,” you exclaim and begin to chew your lip nervously.
“So you like it, then?”
“Huh? Um, I-” you try to stammer out an explanation but hear him chuckle quietly.
“It’s okay. Plenty do,” he takes another step towards you, "So?"
“Uhh, yeah. I guess so,” you reply under your breath, utterly embarrassed by your lack of subtlety.
He hums, sits down at the nearest bench and stretches his arms above his head before resting his hands on his neck.
“Here you go,” his piercing eyes are locked on you as you stand in place, dumbfounded, “Come.”
After a few more moments, you finally walk closer. When you reach the bench, you straddle it so that you are facing his side. He turns his head towards you and nods, giving you his consent. You spend some time there, trying to gather the courage to do what you both know is coming next. No one was ever so comfortable with you about this, or so quick to notice your… predilection.
You finally take the next step and bury your face in his armpit, inhaling deeply. A bolt of arousal shoots through you instantly and you release a loud moan while wrapping your arms around his torso. His wiry hair tickles your cheeks as the intense sharp smell tickles your nostrils.
“Hmm, good pet. Does that smell nice?” he says while caressing the back of your head.
You whine in response and lift up your legs to rest on the other side of the bench, pulling yourself even closer to him. The scent floods your brain with some sort of primal urge that makes you lose any semblance of composure. You’re clinging to him like a baby koala, face squished under his arm. But it’s not enough, you need more. So you break away, only for a second, to immediately plant your tongue on him and drag it up. The salty taste combined with the strong musk is heavenly and makes you moan again, louder as your mouth is open.
“Greedy child. Isn’t it getting a bit dry in there?” he coos.
“Mmhm…” you hum into his skin.
“Then how about we fix that?”
He lowers his arm slowly, letting your head move out of the way, and wraps it around your waist. He lifts you up swiftly and lays you on the mat that’s on the floor, hungry eyes looking into yours. His hands slide down to take off your pants and underwear in one swift motion. His eyes fall on your glistening cunt and his eyebrow rises in curiosity.
“So wet just from sniffing me? Dirty little thing.”
His fingers find your entrance and glide easily over you, lightly rubbing up and down a few times before pressing inside of you. As he’s working you open with one hand, the other is holding him up above your shoulder, letting his aroma periodically reach your nose and excite you further.
“Papa, please, can you-” you whimper in desperation.
“What is it, tesoro?” he tilts his head teasingly.
“I need you, please, fuck me,” you groan impatiently.
“As you wish.”
He gets up onto his knees and pulls down his shorts, letting his erection bounce out. He grips his cock and spreads the gathering bead of precum over his length before lining himself up with your cunt. Once his head pushes past your opening, you gasp at the stretch. You almost forgot how girthy he was. His length is slowly sinking into you, letting you adjust to the impressive size. When he bottoms out, he plants his hands at either side of your head to hold himself up as he begins to lazily roll his hips.
“C’mon, faster, please,” you whine and writhe under him.
“So greedy and impatient. Satana, what a brat.”
He punctuates the last word with a sharp thrust that knocks the air, and the attitude, out of you. You get what you wanted, his cock pounding into you in quick and deep movements. As you start to lose yourself in the feeling of having your cunt thoroughly stuffed over and over, you notice the slick layer of sweat return to his skin. You instinctively pull yourself up by holding onto his back and run your tongue over any hint of moisture you find. He notices you take initiative and rolls over so that you’re now on top, one of his hands resting behind his head as the other grasps your hip.
That animal inside you takes over again and you fuck yourself on him while licking his chest desperately. In your frenzy, you almost miss the shudder when you graze his nipple, but you try to remember that for later. Hopefully there will be a ‘later’. But there are more pressing matters now. You reach your nose and mouth to his armpit, still moving on his lap. The scent has now shifted into a more deep and sweet aroma of sex, the taste remaining sharp on your tongue. All of your senses are overwhelmed by him, you’re filled to the brim with his essence, and just about ready to burst.
You can feel him move his hips up to piston into you while you messily ride his cock. All thoughts are gone from your brain, you’re enveloped by him and you cry out in pleasure when you tumble over the edge. He keeps pumping into you as you writhe on his chest, guiding you through your climax. Once you’re spent and limp, he flips you over and takes charge once again.
“I’m not done with you yet, pet,” he growls and snaps his hips, making you keen from overstimulation.
He’s back to fucking you relentlessly, his thumb traveling to your clit. Once it touches you, you jerk your hips to escape the intense sensation, but he doesn’t move away. He draws tight circles on your clit as he pounds you and it doesn’t take long for you to come a second time. Your walls clenching around him push him into orgasm with you this time and he spills his cum inside of you.
He falls down on top of you and you both stay still for a while, trying to catch your breath. You’re so drained that you nearly fall asleep, completely forgetting that you’re still on the floor of the gym. What snaps you back to reality is the sound of Secondo muttering your name.
“Wait… you remember me?” your eyelids fly open and you turn towards his face in surprise.
“Of course I do, tesoro. That was one of the best nights of my life,” he replies with a fond smile.
“I thought you were too drunk to remember anything at all… But then why didn’t you say anything just now?” you ask, your brows knitting together.
“Because you didn’t. Maybe you had forgotten. Or didn’t want to talk about it,” he says, a bit of anxiety poking through his otherwise steady voice.
“Ha, as if I’d forget something like that! I’m sure that was just another Friday night for you.”
“I assure you, it was not.”
“Can- can we do this again? I mean- not this exactly this but- you know,” you stumble over your words and he chuckles at your awkwardness.
“Yes, I’d be glad to. Now let’s leave before the cleaning ghoul gets here, hm?” he starts to get up as you still lie on the mat.
“So the gym does close at night?”
“Not officially, but they have to clean at some point, no? Here,” he holds his hand out to help you up and you accept it.
After you clean up and part ways, you’re walking back to your room in disbelief of this chance encounter. You had thought that the wild night was nothing special for him, just another Sibling to take for a ride of their lives, never to talk to again. But apparently you were wrong. Maybe there was something there.
#I beg you fellow freaks pls give this some love#my fic#smut#mdni#kinktober#kinktober 2023#papa emeritus ii#papa emeritus ii x reader#secondo#secondo x reader#ghost the band#the band ghost#the band ghost fic#the band ghost fanfiction#ghost band smut#ghost band fanfiction#ghost band fanfic#ghost band
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I just had a really weird experience with a dating app and I don't know what's real anymore.
I matched with a cute girl earlier today, and we spent a couple hours talking about our shared interests in podcasts and history and weird niche topics nobody else cares about. It was nice, and I asked her if she wanted to get lunch sometime this week. She said she'd like that, but then immediately changed the subject to talk about her job instead of scheduling the date. I mean, that's not TOO weird, I figure she must have wanted to say no but didn't want to hurt my feelings. Whatever. No big deal. We keep talking.
She mentioned that she works as a medical scribe at a doctor's office, and I said that that sounds like a wizard's apprentice. She said that medicine is the intersection between science and magic. I replied with a throwaway joke that chemistry is just alchemy with a little flair, and then shit went off the rails because she sent me a link to a pornhub video titled "We came at the same Time - Sensual Side Fuck" and said "me when someone tells me they're an alchemist."
A cute girl sends me a literal porn link after dodging the question of whether she wanted to go on a date, so I'm confused as hell. I don't know if this is her way of flirting or what, so I replied "I'd be down to practice some alchemy if you're not busy." I regretted saying it immediately because I never talk to anyone like that, I was just blind sided by the porn and thought maybe she would think it was funny. Well, after a few minutes she says "did you just ask to fuck me?"
Okay, I'm going down in flames, I crossed a line, that alchemy "joke" was inappropriate and creepy and she's clearly not into it and she's probably gonna unmatch me and block me and report me or something. I'm still confused over the direction the conversation is going, but I decide it'd be better if I apologize and go on the defensive instead of doubling down like a jackass. I tell her "no, not really," I'm not soliciting a stranger for sex, I was just yes-anding. She sent a porn link. What was I supposed to say? How was I supposed to respond?
Another few minutes pass. I was 100% sure that when I reopened the app she would be gone, but no, she finally replied "I was hoping you were..."
What kind of mind game is this? Is she just looking for a hookup? Her profile specifically says she's not! I have no idea what's going on.
"Did you just ask to fuck me?" My honest answer would have been "yes, isn't that what you wanted?" but the thought of saying that to somebody makes me feel like a douchebag. Her tone with that question didn't sound flirty, it sounded accusatory, like she was outraged I had the audacity to ask for sex so soon. My social anxiety is going through the roof. Whoops, turns out she actually WAS flirting and DID want to have sex, and I've managed to waffle it and sound like an asshole no matter what I say. Damned if I do, damned if I don't.
From my perspective:
Her: *posts meme about sex* (it's just a meme, nothing more. Don't read into it)
Me: *flirty memey response* (could go either way; I'm not outright saying I want to have sex with her, I'm just matching her energy. She memes about sex, I reply in kind because I thought it would be weirder go ignore it)
Her: oh my god, did you really just say that? Did you really think I wanted to have sex with you?
Me: I'm sorry, I overstepped
Her: mind games, dumbass! You don't know what I want, motherfucker!"
From her perspective:
Her: our conversation is going well, let me drop a big hint that I want to hook up
Me: picks up on the hint
Her: really?
Me: NO!
Her: oh... okay... nevermind...
So then I take a step back and try to see if there's any way whatsoever to salvage this dumpster fire of a conversation. I admit that I'm confused and ask her point blank if she wanted to have sex. I legitimately don't know if she was making a move or not, and I need her to know that I'm not the kind of guy who asks for sex as an opening move but I'm not opposed to it if she's the one bringing it up. There's no way to fix this. I failed at this interaction. I need to cut my losses, but somehow we keep talking.
She says, quote "I like making art and love. Sometimes at the same time, ya know?"
I say "do you want to make love?"
She says "we probably should."
I ask her if she'd like to get something to eat first, as was my initial date plan before the porn thing. Her response confused me even more. "I can't right now. I'm exhausted from traveling all weekend. I haven't eaten and feel like I'm gonna pass out." That reply doesn't make sense. It's Wednesday and she says she's too hungry to get dinner. That's when I noticed that her previous message ended with a period.
"We probably should," period. I scrolled back up through our conversation and realized that EVERY message she sent me ended with a period. Every single one! Oh, and some of them weren't even direct responses to anything I said, so now I'm 1000% convinced that she's a bot. I got tricked into talking for three hours with a bot, and I derailed the scam by rolling a nat 1 critical fail when it tried to sext me.
I ask "her" point blank when she wants to meet up, and it said "I need to eat first. Make food, not war, lol. Where are your top places to grab food?"
Bot. Almost certainly a bot.
My final reply, in the extraordinarily small off chance that she's not a bot, was to say it depends on my mood, before losting three or four of my go-to places.
"She" didn't unmatch, but she ghosted me. No reply.
Bot. Absolutely a bot. No doubt about it.
TLDR, I got catfished by a bot!
#dating app#bumble#tldr#tl;dr#catfish#bot#pornbot#sexbot#spambot#ai#I got played#i got played like a fiddle#dating profile#oh well#god dammit#long post#long#text#anecdote#my life#story of my life#social anxiety#anxiety#failure#crit fail
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