#pls let the love square flip
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I (F15) noticed that my best friend (F14) is super obsessed with cats... particularly black cats. She keeps making black cat themed outfits, somehow getting her hands on black cat stuffed animals, and even bought a bunch of Cat Noir merch and hung his photos all over her walls!
I think this obsession is getting a bit out of hand, and I want to bring it up with her....
So, would I be the asshole if I called my friend out on her cat obsession?
#aita#miraculous ladybug#miraculous comic#ml comic#chat noir#alya cesaire#marinette dupain cheng#ml#marichat#miraculous fanart#miraculous shitpost#miraculous season 5#love square#pls let the love square flip#PLEASE
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"Does Shen Qiao even like Yan Wushi?"
I feel like it may be relatively easy for people to pick out "what does Yan Wushi like about Shen Qiao / what does YWS get out of yanshen." but I think a criticism/line of thought I see around is people struggling with "well what does Shen Qiao get out of all of this?" and like, "does SQ even like YWS, what with how YWS annoys him and gets him angry all the time."
But I think that actually is the crux of their relationship, lol. Because if you think about it, to everyone else, Shen Qiao is this lofty ideal, this untouchable immortal/仙, maybe even this obstacle or goal to conquer or shoot down.
Who else treats him casually and teases him and pokes at him to get emotional reactions out of him because they like that about him?
If he wants to seek people who treat him with respect and reverence, he just has to step out into the city square - hell, he just has to travel out and random people he meets are likely to treat him with that sort of dazzled awe or reverence too (we literally see this happen several times in the course of the novel).
So yeah, I think joking not joking, YWS makes him angry and feel Emotions and he likes that, YWS is enrichment for him, YWS pushes his buttons and his boundaries but reframing that it's pushing him out of his comfort zone and like hardening him off to the elements and realities of the world like a gardener with plants out of the greenhouse. But also, YWS treats him like a person, like a man, and not like Shen-daozun, Shen-daozhang, Shen-zhangjiao. To Yan Wushi, Shen Qiao is Shen Qiao. (and he loves to tease the shit out of him hehe (￣▽￣) )
CONVERSELY! This also gives Shen Qiao a space to *be* Shen Qiao. With Yan Wushi, he does not have to be Shen-daozun, Shen-daozhang, Shen-zhangjiao. He does not have to always be magnanimous and generous and a bastion of righteousness. These are in his nature, yet, but it's not ALL of his nature - he is, after all, still a man, a human, with human emotions -- including the full breadth of human emotions. Yes Yan Wushi annoys him and he shows it, but it's specifically BECAUSE of that that they are closer than him and anyone else in the world. He can "be himself" around Yan Wushi, he can get worked up and be petty and be snippy, and it's fine and won't cause catastrophes or undesired splashdown sociopolitical effects.
But also, he (lets himself?) get worked up by Yan Wushi - they HAVE that level of intimate understanding with each other where they can be like this and not have feelings hurt in any irreparable way. This isn't something that SQ does (lets himself do?) with just anyone, which we see throughout the novel reflected in his internal narration and comportment. So really, the fact that he DOES get annoyed with YWS shows that they are on a different, more "real" level with each other than SQ is with anyone else.
And like, they didn't get there in a day, sure, but imo we definitely see through the novel how they get there, so imo, the yanshen relationship is incredibly justified.
(I also say this bc I think literally every "I've connected the two dots" moments I've had in my reread, I would metaphorically flip the page only to be met with that connection I'd made spelled out on the page by MXS lmao. Like... yeah okay MXS *shakes your hand* you know your stuff. oh and also because I do think there may be some level of skepticism about yanshen esp from SQ's side floating around lol, but like... MXS did the legwork! yes chapter 45 happened, yes YWS never "apologizes" with words, but that doesn't mean that they don't share a deep mutual understanding of themselves and each other by the end, nor that they haven't moved past the events of literally 83 chapters ago, 96 if you count the extras -- a whole literal two-thirds of the novel ago. Like, I know we piss on the poor here and many educational systems around the world are in shambles these days, but work on developing reading comprehension skills, pls :') )
(lmao rip this post got long AGAIN. well, hopefully at least some people are reading all of this lol.)
#qian qiu#thousand autumns#qian qiu meta#yan wushi#shen qiao#mood is another great idea by ME dot meme#anyway here is my latest hot take! inspired by a meta post I glanced at from ages ago that I did not actually read properly#bc I think even then I Disagreed with the thoughts on it and thought it was kind of lukewarm lol#when like... I think SQ is also insane for YWS - it's just harder to see if you're approaching it from a conventional kind of interp#and also bc YWS is so much more vocal/ostentatious with his brand of craziness lol#but like. I very much ascribe to the 'actually SQ is like padme amidala' school of thought (that I coined lol)#and it's like. when you let go of 'but who would DO that/think that' and just accept. he does. and what does it say about him#it all starts to make sense#also yes I did this in a sort of long-winded reblog lol but now I'm making it its own post#hopefully this one is a bit more uhh concise than the last one now that my thoughts have percolated and set (as with a mousse) some more
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through the hourglass 368. brb x oc
a/n: WHY IS THIS MAN SO BEAUTIFUL (comments and reblogs are super welcome and encouraged!)
pairing: plus size!oc x rooster
warnings: kinda suggestive,nothing more
goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)
chapter
1/
/316/317/318/319/320/321/322/323/324/325/326/327/328/329/330/331/332/333/334/335/336/337/338/339/340/341/342/343/344/345/346/347/348/349/350/351/352/353/354/355/356/357/358/359/360/361/362/363/364/365/366
/367
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@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2
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Beatrice smiles when a pair of muscular arms wrap around her waist as she folds their oldest’s clothes,”Hey,” she whispers, “I thought I told you to rest.” she doesn’t stop smiling, cheeks hurting when his lips peck her neck and he props his chin on her shoulder.
“Guess I missed you.”
“Mhm.”
“Nikki is up?”
“She’s waking up, the twins are still asleep.” she says, “I thought it’d be good to fold some of her clothes before she wakes fully,” and he pulls her closer to his chest, humming deep in his throat. “She got that from someone,I think.”
She turned in his arms, her gaze meeting his as she searched for the words to express her love for him. But before she could speak, he leaned down, capturing her lips in a tender kiss.
When they finally pulled away, Beatrice touched his cheek, “Do you want to help me?”
He smiled, a gentle curve of his lips that reached his eyes. "Of course, gorgeous," he replied, "I'd be honored to help you."
“Honored,huh?”
Together, they moved to the small pile of clothes laid out on the bed, each garment a memory woven into the fabric of their lives. Beatrice picked up a tiny onesie, pink and delicate, and held it up to the light, admiring the intricate stitching.
"It feels like just yesterday we brought Nikki home in this," she murmured, rubbing her thumb over the tiny embroidery.
He nodded, his fingers tracing the outline of the fabric. "Time flies, doesn't it?" he said, his tone reflective. "It's hard to believe she's already grown so much."
"You're amazing with them," she whispered, her voice barely above a breath.
He looked up, a soft smile playing on his lips. "What? Folding clothes? You learn how to be good at it when you are in the Navy.” he flips the tiny piece of clothing quickly, forming a perfect square, “See?”
As he finished folding the onesie, he carefully placed it in the pile with the rest of Nikki's clothes. "There we go," he said, satisfaction evident in his voice.
Beatrice smiled, reaching out to take his hand. "Thank you for helping me," she said softly, squeezing his fingers gently.
He returned her smile, his eyes warm. "Anytime, baby," he replied, his tone sincere. "I'm always here to help you, you know that."
"We should probably put these away," she said, “Before Nikki and the twins wake up.” she hears the known babbling from their one year old daughter, “Nevermind,Nikki is already up.”
She glanced over at the baby monitor, noting the soft sounds of the twins still sleeping peacefully and Nicole sitting on her crib, brown hair a mess and in all angles. With a gentle tug, she led her husband towards her room, where neatly folded clothes awaited their rightful places in her very kid friendly dresser.
As in Nicole discovered stickers and managed to glue them all on it.
The room was filled with a comfortable silence, broken only by the occasional coo from Nikki in the other room. Beatrice stole glances at her husband as they worked, feeling a rush of gratitude and love for the man beside her.
As they finished putting away the last of Nikki's clothes, Beatrice leaned against the dresser, exhaling softly. "Thank you," she said again, her voice filled with genuine appreciation.
He turned to her, a soft smile on his lips. "Anything for you," he replied, his gaze filled with warmth. “Doesn’t feel fair I’m the only one being pampered today.”
‘Well,LC,your promotion ceremony is tomorrow…so…” she walks around her husband towards Nicole’s crib, kissing the three tiny scars on his chin, “I love pampering you.”
"You know," she said softly, tracing her finger along the edge of one of the scars, "I still worry about you every time you go out there."
Her husband's expression softened, and he reached out to cup her cheek, his touch warm and reassuring. "I know, gorgeous," he said, his voice gentle. "But you also know that I'll always come back to you."
Beatrice nodded, "I know," she whispered, leaning into his touch. "But that doesn't make it any easier."
He pulled her into his arms, holding her close as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "I promise to always come back to you," he murmured against her hair. "You and the kids are my everything."
Beatrice closed her eyes, feeling a sense of peace wash over her at his words. She knew he meant them with every fiber of his being, and she couldn't imagine her life without him by her side.
With a soft smile, Beatrice turned her attention back to Nicole, who was now happily playing with her toys in her crib. "Looks like someone's in a good mood today," she remarked, her voice filled with affection.
Her husband chuckled, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "She definitely takes after you," he said, his tone teasing. "Always so cheerful in the morning."
“I’m not that cheerful in the morning,Roos.”
"Maybe not as cheerful as Nicole, but you're definitely a sight for sore eyes," he said, reaching over to ruffle her hair affectionately.
Beatrice swatted his hand away with a mock scowl, though her eyes twinkled with amusement. "Flattery will get you everywhere, you know," she teased, her tone light and affectionate. “Bradley Bradshaw, you are terrible.”
Bradley grinned, "Oh, I know, but you love me anyway," he teased, pulling her into another embrace.
Beatrice couldn't help but laugh, her heart swelling with affection for this man who knew just how to make her smile . "I suppose I do," she admitted, leaning into his warmth. “Come on, Roos, Nikki is just staring at us wondering when she’ll escape this prison that is her crib.”
He lets her go with some hesitance and Beatrice just smiles again as she walks up to the crib "Alright, little miss," she cooed, reaching down to scoop Nikki up into her arms. "Let's get you out of there, shall we?"
Nikki's face lit up with a toothy grin as Beatrice lifted her out of the crib, her chubby arms wrapping around her mother's neck in a tight hug. "Looks like someone's ready for breakfast," he remarked, stepping closer to them. "Shall we go downstairs and see what delicious treats Mommy has prepared for us?"
Nikki let out a babble of excitement, “Yea!” her eyes lighting up at the mention of food. Beatrice laughed, nodding in agreement.
“Baby formula for her and some nice puréed fruits.” she smiles in reply, “Why don’t you take her,Roos? I’m gonna check on the twins and you already had breakfast,so!’
Bradley grinned and nodded, taking Nikki into his arms. "Sure thing, baby. I'll take care of this little munchkin while you check on the twins." He flashed her a wink before turning to Nikki, bouncing her gently as he headed out of the room.
Beatrice watched them go with a fond smile, feeling grateful for the simple joy of their morning routine. With a sigh of contentment, she turned her attention to the twins' room, tiptoeing quietly across the hall.
Pushing the door open slowly, Beatrice peeked inside to find Alex and Ava still fast asleep in their cribs. The soft morning light filtered through the curtains, casting a gentle glow over their faces. Beatrice couldn't help but feel a surge of love and warmth as she gazed at her sleeping babies.
Moving silently, she crossed the room to Gavin’s crib first, leaning down to brush a soft kiss against his forehead. His tiny chest rose and fell rhythmically with each breath,and with a smile, Beatrice tucked the blanket around him a little tighter before turning to Aurora’s crib.
Ava lay curled up on her side, her chubby cheeks flushed with sleep. Beatrice couldn't resist the urge to run her fingers through her daughter's silky hair, marveling at the miracle of her existence.
With one last loving glance at the twins, Beatrice quietly slipped out of the room, closing the door behind her with a soft click. She made her way downstairs to join Bradley and Nikki in the kitchen, where the smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the air.
Bradley was already seated at the table with Nikki in his lap, a wide grin on his face as he cooed and played with her. Beatrice couldn't help but smile at the sight, feeling her heart swell with love for her little family.
"Good morning, you two," she greeted them, crossing the room to pour herself a cup of coffee. "Did you sleep well, Nikki?"
Nikki giggled in response, reaching out to grab at Beatrice's hair with chubby fingers. Beatrice laughed, gently extricating herself from her daughter's grasp before taking a seat at the table.
"We both slept like babies," Bradley replied with a grin, bouncing Nikki on his knee. "Isn't that right, munchkin? And mama surprised me!"
Nikki let out another delighted giggle, her eyes sparkling with joy as she reached out to grab at Bradley's mustache. “Ow!Hey! Come on!”
Bradley playfully dodged her tiny fingers, making exaggerated faces that only elicited more giggles from their daughter. Setting her coffee down, Beatrice reached over to gently take Nikki's hand, diverting her attention from Bradley's mustache. "Be gentle, sweetheart," she reminded her with a soft smile. "We don't want to hurt Daddy."
Nikki seemed to understand, and instead of tugging at Bradley's facial hair, she turned her attention to a nearby toy, happily babbling as she played with it on the table.
Bradley let out a relieved sigh, running a hand through his tousled hair. "Thanks, baby. I don't think I could handle being attacked by tiny fingers and giggles all day."
"You're welcome," she replied teasingly. "But you better get used to it. You knew that once Nikki started crawling, there’d be no stopping her."
Bradley grinned, his eyes lighting up "Oh, I know.," he said, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “Our peaceful mornings will be a thing of the past."
“Aa!”
“Sorry,sweetie, dada is just joking.”
With a contented sigh, Beatrice leaned back in her chair, savoring the moment. She watched as Bradley continued to play with Nikki, "You're quite the entertainer, Daddy," Beatrice remarked, a fond smile tugging at her lips as she observed the playful exchange between father and daughter.
Bradley grinned"Well, you know me," he replied, "I've always been good with an audience."
Beatrice chuckled, shaking her head in amusement. "That you have, dear," she agreed, “You think Nikki or the twins will be…piano players just like you- sorry,I meant, multi instrumentalists like you?”
"I suppose anything is possible," he replied thoughtfully, "But it's too early to tell. They're still so young. We'll just have to wait and see what they gravitate towards."
Beatrice smiled at the image, her mind drifting to a future filled with music and laughter. "It certainly would be something special," she agreed. "But for now, let's just focus on enjoying these precious moments with them. Oh, by the way, since today is pampering my husband day,I’m going to go out really quick and get stuff for you.”
As if on cue, Nikki let out a delighted squeal, her chubby arms reaching out towards Bradley. He scooped her up into his arms, peppering her face with kisses as she giggled with delight. Bradley placed Nikki back in her high chair, ready to tackle the day ahead. She joined him at the table, reaching for a plate of freshly baked scones that Bradley had prepared earlier.
“What?” he asked, “Sorry,got distracted.”
She smiles, “I said that I’ll go out and get stuff for you.”
His eyebrows perked up as he adjusted Nicole in her chair, “...what kinda stuff?”
Beatrice grinned. "Oh, just some surprises," she replied playfully, shrugging her shoulders "You'll just have to wait and see."
"You're full of surprises, aren't you, Bea?" he said with a grin, leaning in to press a quick kiss to her cheek. "Well,okay…are you going to take long?"
“Hmmmm maybe,”
“Maybe?”
With a wink, Beatrice rose from the table, grabbing her coat from the hook by the door. "I won't be long,or maybe I will." she promised, slipping her arms into the sleeves. "Just need to run a few errands."
He purses his lips, “...baby what are you planning?”
Beatrice just grinned mischievously in response, giving Bradley a playful wink before heading out the door. Bradley watched her go with a curious expression, wondering what surprises his wife had in store for him.
…part of him hoped they’d be naughty.
#im happy yall are still here#bradley rooster bradshaw#rooster bradshaw#bradley bradshaw x oc#top gun maverick#bradley bradshaw x reader#bradley bradshaw x female reader#bradley bradshaw x named reader#tgm oc#tgm fic#tgm fanfiction
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you are in love – m. tkachuk
warning(s): fluff, small angst, insinuation of smut ((barely)) and sadness<333
inspired by: you are in love by taylor swift w a lil twist<33
word count: 33,031
an: hi ya i’ve been MIA on the writing scene for a bit bc just a general plateau of inspiration but oh lookey here, what’s this??? a new fic??? buckle up besties bc i wrote this in literally four hours and crying about 80% of the time bc i was deep in my feels for over a day when i wrote it, so it’s not edited, probs wont even make any sense either but ya enjoy cool!!! also if it doesn't make any sense thats bc a lot of this was edited from what the original version was and i had to add a bunch of filler shit to make it a hockey fic vs just my personal way of letting my emotions out. so again, don't mind it, enjoy the fic, blah blah blah okay bye<333. ((an 2.0: p.s. i wrote this way before ratty's trade, but added it in the end so if the timeline doesn't add up don't attack pls bc like i said...tons of filler was added)) *italics indicate flashbacks*
You never realize how much stuff can fill a one bedroom apartment until the fifth trip to the store to buy more moving boxes because you seriously underestimated just how much you owned. That could arguably be one of the top three worst things when it comes to moving, tied with actually having to pack your stuff and shifting through what to keep and what to give away.
Luckily, Riley had all the time in the world seeing as she had no responsibilities aside from doing exactly what she was doing in this moment- packing up everything and anything she owned and managed to shove into her 744 square foot apartment she’d called home for the last two years. A mixture of memories brought from home and collected during her time here were all over the apartment, and now in a week's time, they needed to be shoved into multiple moving boxes labeled properly so she wouldn’t be going on a wild goose chase when it came to unpacking them again.
Unluckily, she was also the type of person who found herself easily distracted whenever she came across something that she’d either forgotten she’d owned altogether, or that she’d remember misplacing at one point in time and just never found. A coffee mug, and part gag gift that had “don’t speak” on it from her dad who always jokes that she’s unable and not willing to have a conversation before drinking at least half a cup of coffee– it was buried in the middle back of her cabinet with her other mugs. A swear word coloring book meant for her sister that had somehow slipped behind her bedside table. The journal her mom had gifted her her first Christmas into her masters courses when she’d mentioned how she thought about starting journaling every day as one of her New Year's resolutions.
Riley couldn’t remember the last time she had written in it, though she knew she’d kept the habit up for at least a minimum of the entirety of January, so she flipped open the journal, watching the blank pages brush by until she saw the black ink of the pen she’d always used to write in it. And in the top right corner, was the date of her last entry– March 11th.
She didn’t need to read the entry to remember what she’d written in it…but she was already here, with the journal wide open in her hands…what could it hurt to relive the memory she’d written down on that day?
“Hey, so Jacob and Bren have got pretty much everything packed up in the pod,” Claire said, walking into the now empty apartment and stopping by the bar of the kitchen island where Riley had been leaning. “Are you ready to lock it up or is there some stuff you still need to add?”
Riley looked up from the journal, shutting the hardcover journal– the front of it decorated in pink watercolor pastel and a small bouquet of yellow flowers with the phrase “through sun and rain, flowers bloom all the same” written in black cursive, the pink marking ribbon hanging outside of the lined pages instead of marking where she’d last left off like it was supposed to be.
“Um no, no,” she replied, glancing up from the journal and shaking her head as she placed the journal into the box on the counter next to her, folding the flaps properly and locking them in each other before sliding it off of the counter and holding it in her arms. “Just this box here, but I’ve got it.”
Claire nodded and turned to face what had previously been a homey living room, but was now just an empty room full of potential possibilities. “It feels weird to see this place empty again since I still remember Jacob and I helping you move in with Bren, mom and dad two years ago. I guess it’s a little sad too,” she looked at Riley, nudging her with her shoulder. “But I guess I’m proud of you for getting this job, though I will miss having you within instant bugging distance of me.”
“Gee, thanks,” Riley replied, stepping away from the counter. “Come on, let’s go put this in the pod so we can lock it up and call the company to pick it up soon.”
“Tell me that means we can get early dinner too, right? I’m absolutely starving.” Claire huffed, grabbing the keys to the apartment off of the counter and following behind Riley as they left the now empty place she once called home.
“We can,” Riley nodded, stopping just outside the door as she watched Claire lock the apartment door before they started moving down the hall and towards the elevator. “But I have one more thing I need to do before that.”
Claire’s eyebrows furrowed for only a split second before she pursed her lips and nodded. “That’s right, yeah we’ll totally make a stop before dinner. And then after that–”
“St. Louis,” Riley sighed, her thumbs rubbing against the cardboard in her hands as she nodded. “Yeah, bright and early, first flight out of here.”
“Then you’re Boston bound once Mom and Dad get their trips down memory lane in,” Claire smiled, looking down at her phone and typing.
For a moment as she followed behind Claire, she looked down at the box, seeing her own writing in black sharpie across one of the flabs– “Miscellaneous Junk – Riles’ room” “Did you write this on the box?”
Claire looked over her shoulder as the elevator doors opened and peered at the box, nodding her head. “Yeah, it’s just a bunch of junk from your desk isn’t it? Nothing really important is in there, just your knick knacks and stuff from your drawers.”
‘Nothing really important’ stung her harder than it probably should have because sure, she’d asked Claire to go through her desk and toss whatever was left into one box, but that was before she’d looked in and seen what was in it. Random stickers, concert lanyards, the gag gift of a gift box of glow in the dark condoms Janelle had given her– so many of the things in there fell under the junk title Claire had given the box…the ‘nothing really important’ category. But not that journal…nothing written on those lined pages was junk, everything in that journal mattered to Riley.
It took everything in her not to reach in and grab the journal from inside the box, but she didn’t want to gain her sister’s attention or want her interest to be piqued on what was within the hardcover gift. So instead, she just readjusted her grip onto the box and thought about all the ways she might be able to sneak it out without anyone noticing before they put the box into the pod, which would be shipped off to Boston, hopefully later tonight.
There were only 69 entries in that journal, there should’ve been at least 184, but the way she’d gotten swept up in life every day after March 11th, writing in that journal had slipped to the very back of her mind. But every moment of those 69 entries and the 114 days after that, all the way up to that moment on July 2nd that felt world ending, to today– July 4th…it all mattered.
DAY 12 – JANUARY 12TH, 2022 [ FIRST MEETING ]
“I have absolutely no right to be here right now,” Riley said, tugging on the top of the bodycon dress Claire had managed to squeeze her into for the night. One that was just one size too small but for some Godforsaken reason had seemed to fit her everywhere but her chest, which Claire called a blessing but she called a girl's gone wild moment waiting to happen.
“You have every right to be here,” she replied, keeping her steady pace as her heels clicked against the pavement while simultaneously digging through her small clutch for her lip gloss.
“In what dimension do I have the right to be crashing a girls night out–” Riley quickened her pace, the heels Claire also pressured her to shove her feet into for the night, almost matching her own as they clicked on the sidewalk. “Where all of the girls in question, except for me, have the same exact thing in common?”
“Which is?”
“You know exactly what it is,” she huffed, finally coming up beside her just as the two of them were met with the bouncer of the club, the bearded man who looked like he walked off of the front cover of a bodybuilding magazine, instantly waving them both through. “You’re literally all dating professional athletes…on the same team…teammates, Claire. That’s what you all have in common.”
Claire rolled her eyes, grabbing her hand as they both entered the crowded club floor and leading her in the direction of where most of her friends were. “I think you’re forgetting one thing, you also know someone here because you’re both in the same masters courses.”
“Fine, I have one thing in common with one person out of what? The twenty that are here?”
“And me, or have you all of a sudden forgotten that you’re a twin? Because if you’re still mad about me stealing your book fair money in elementary school, I think you need to see a therapist.”
Riley pulled her hand from hers, tugging up at the top of her dress again. “We’re not even twins. You’re eleven months older than me–”
“Basically making us twins,” Claire replied, pulling her forward as she came to a stop in front of a small set of stairs that led up to multiple booths. “Fourth one down, move it.”
“It’s a wonder how you ever won the friendliest in the entire class your senior year,” Riley said, sending a playful glare over her shoulder. “If only they knew the real you.”
“You’re my sister, you get both my nice side and my ‘if you take my favorite sweater out of my closet one more time without asking I’ll dump water on your head in the middle of the night to wake you up,’ side,” Claire smiled, keeping her hand on the small of Riley’s back and nuding her ahead. “Besides, you won best smile which is odd because you never smile, you old grouch.”
“Finally you two show up!” Meredith, Johnny Gaudreau’s wife, was the first one to spot them as Claire shoved Riley up to the booth where the familiar faces of the girls who were either married to or dating Flames players that Riley had gotten to know so far, were sitting in.
“Yeah, it took everything in me to convince Ri here to come out with us and to at least put a little effort into her appearance,” Claire said, greeting Meredith with a hug before moving along to greet the rest of the girls who were there.
“Ha ha, very funny, but some of us have school–”
“Oh not the school excuse,” Kelsey, the one girl out of all of them who Riley had one thing in common with, seeing they were both pursuing Masters Degrees at the University of Calgary in the Kinesiology program. “I know for a fact that we have nothing due over the weekend, not even until the end of next week. Take a break for once Riley, you’re mastering the classes, no pun intended.” She smiled, giving Riley a hug.
“See Ri?” Claire smiled over her shoulder before plopping down in a spot Meredith and Annica, who was dating Elias Lindholm, had made between them. “Now relax and have fun. You don’t even have to leave the comfort of this booth if you want.”
“Actually,” Riley replied, giving Claire a sarcastic smile. “I think I might just have some fun and wander down to the bar and get a drink.”
“I’ll come with you actually!” Kylie, who was dating Dillon Dube, chimed in, standing up from the seating.
“Me too!” Kelsey added, standing up. “Plus I wanted to tell you what Oscar’s reaction to that paper we had to turn in last week was. I swear his eyes popped out of his head when I asked him to proofread it.”
Riley laughed, walking back out of the booth as the two followed behind her. “Please, I barely understood what I wrote and I even have all the notes from class.”
The three of them maneuvered their way back down the small set of steps and then back into the crowd of the bar, Kelsey grabbing onto Riley’s hand and then presumably Kylie’s so the three wouldn’t lose one another in the crowd as Riley led them over towards the bar. Thanks to being invited along to some events by Claire, Riley knew most of the WAGs on the team, but the only one she was really on a super friendly basis with, was Kelsey. Kelsey who was born and raised in Calgary and had attended the University of Calgary for her undergraduate degree as well and had been dating Oscar for the last near two years.
The two of them, Kelsey and Riley, hadn’t made their Flames connection until Claire asked Riley if she would tag along with her to brunch with a few other girls, Claire also wanting Riley to ‘stop hiding in your room, you’re young, have fun!’ Kelsey was at brunch, recognized Riley from one of their lectures and the friendship just blossomed into study sessions, coffee trips and Kelsey also having Riley tag along to things.
“Unbelievable,” Kelsey laughed once the three of them managed to grab a space at the crowded bar. “All of the bars in the city and they go here? Knowing we were all coming out tonight?”
“What?” Kylie asked, looking at Riley for help but Riley just shrugged.
Kelsey sighed and rolled her eyes before nodding her head off to their left and then pointing. “All the way at the end of the bar.”
Riley and Kylie both looked over in the direction she was pointing, and instantly the two girls knew what and who she was talking about. There at the end of the bar and of course, all together in a big group, were a few players from the Flames. Riley could see Jacob and Dillon at the bar talking to the bartender and off behind him were Sean, Johnny, Oscar and they were sure more that weren’t in their view.
“If you guys tell me what you want, you’re more than welcome to go over there and chew their asses out a little bit,” Riley smiled, leaning against the bar.
“You don’t mind? Because like Kels said…there are so many bars here,” Kylie said, looking off at the boys.
“Not at all,” Riley replied, waving them off. “As long as you give Jacob a little hell from me for not telling my insane sister to leave me alone tonight.”
Kylie squeezed Riley’s arm as she brushed by and nodded. “We’ll be right back, don’t leave the bar without us so we don’t lose you.”
“And if any creeps sneak up, yell pterodactyl.” Kelsey noddeed, nodding her head. “It’ll scare them off.”
“Pterodactyl, got it,” Riley nodded, watching them walk away before turning back towards the bar and then shaking her head. “Pterodactyl? Where the hell did she get that from?”
The bartender walked over to her, nodding at her. “What can I get you?”
Riley opened her mouth to speak, only to realize that Kelsey and Kylie never told her what they wanted to drink…so she went with a classic. “Can I get three vodka cranberries?”
The bartender nodded and turned away to make the drinks, Riley flipped her phone over and grabbed her card from the card holder she insisted Claire let her borrow since she wasn’t carrying a purse and was stuffed into the dress.
“I hope all of those aren’t for you,” Riley heard someone say as the bartender placed two of the drinks down in front of her. “Cause that’s about three rounds I’ll miss out on buying you a drink.”
She looked to her left to see the familiar face of Matthew, one of Jacob’s teammates. A face that she’s seen obviously on ice for the games she’s attended since her sister started dating Jacob, but also at some of the team parties that Claire’s invited her to or made her tag along as her plus one. “That’s assuming I’d take your offer to let you buy me one, let alone three.”
“Ouch, tough crowd,” he replied, holding his right hand to his chest, right over his heart and rubbing against his gray t-shirt.
“Sorry,” Riley dramatically pouted as she shrugged. “Did I bruise your hockey player ego by turning down your horrible pick up line? Like seriously, does that even work?”
He moved away from the corner of the bar and came up beside her, resting his arms against it. “Who said it was a line? Maybe I was really looking forward to buying you a drink. Plus, maybe I was also sent over here to make sure no creeps are creepy towards you. You know the whole plus one, stay together thing.”
The bartender placed the last drink in front of her and Riley quickly handed over her card before looking at him with a shrug. “Looks like you failed your mission.” The bartender placed her card back down onto the bar in front of her, along with a receipt and a pen. Riley quickly scribbled her signature and a tip before sliding it across the bar and putting her card back into her phone and looking at Matthew. “Both missions actually, cause I just bought my own drink.”
Matthew rolled his eyes before looking at the bartender and nodding his head, holding up two fingers– Riley taking that as the opportunity to grab her drinks and head back towards the booth. “Hey!” She turned around to see Matthew leaning against the bar, nodding at her with a smile. “The night’s still young. That’s plenty of time for me to buy you that drink!”
“Not unless you find someone else to entertain your time and horrible pick up lines,” Riley smiled back, nodding her head for him to look behind him as a girl was just getting ready to tap him on the shoulder– her intentions for him very clear. “Just don’t use that buy you a drink one.” Riley winked and turned back towards where she was walking, carefully making her way back over to the booth where Claire and the rest of the girls were.
“Riles!” Claire cheered, holding up her empty shot glass before putting it back onto the table. “Where are Kels and Kylie?”
“You guys have some bar crashers!” Riley replied, placing the drinks that belonged to Kylie and Kelsey down onto the table, then covering them with one of the napkins that came wrapped around the cup. “Some of the guys are here and they went to go talk to them.”
“Ugh! All of the bars for a girls night out and they choose this one?” Meredith complained, rolling her eyes and finishing off her drink, then standing up. “I need another drink.”
Once she made her way out of the booth with another girl following behind, Claire took that opportunity to slide over next to Riley. “Get the sourpuss look off your face, have fun and relax, Ri!”
“I am, I’m having a ball! Lame pick up line, alcoholic drink and all!” Riley replied, leaning towards Claire so she could hear her.
“Pick up line? Who tried to pick you up?!” Claire smiled, practically beaming at the idea of Riley getting some sort of attention in the romance department. “Come up, point them out!”
“It was just one of Jacob’s teammates, it was nothing serious–”
Claire grabbed onto her arm, gripping it as her smile grew bigger. “Who! Who! You need to tell me who it was right now!”
Riley rolled her eyes, still able to see where Matthew was standing at the bar…the girl who Riley had told him about, standing next to him a little close and the two talking. She pointed out towards the bar and looked at Claire. “Him.”
She watched as Claire’s focus moved all across the bar before landing on where Riley had been pointing. Riley waited for a falter in her sister’s expression, but all stayed the same aside from Claire laughing and shaking her head. “Oh, Matthew? He’s harmless! A flirt, but a harmless one.”
“Clearly since he’s already moved on from wanting to buy me a drink and insisting on that he will,” Riley replied, turning her attention away from Matthew and the girl at the bar. “But how about we try not to shove any potential attractive male down my throat?”
“But that’s no–”
“You want me to let loose and have a good time?” Riley asked, sipping on the straw in her drink as Claire nodded. “Okay, then stop trying to pawn me off to any guy who shows a remote sense of interest.”
Claire rolled her eyes and sipped on a lighter drink that Riley knew was probably a margarita. “Did you at least think he was cute? Matthew?”
Riley sighed. “I’m not into that right now Claire, you know this. I’m not looking for–”
“A relationship, or love, or someone who will drag you out of the house on a Friday night so you can’t sit on your couch and watch One Tree Hill at night,” Claire replied, waving a hand at Riley and brushing her off. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. But appease me just this once…do you think he’s cute?”
Riley looked back over to the bar where she watched Matthew take two beers from the bartender before saying something to the girl and then turning around, leaving her at the bar and walking back towards the group of his teammates. “I mean…yeah, he’s cute–”
“Thank you,” Claire smiled, hugging her sister and then pulling away, clinking her cup against hers. “Now was that too hard?”
“I think I just felt a piece of my soul wither and fall off actually,” Riley smiled, taking another sip of her drink as she looked at her sister.
“Oh stop being an old hag,” Claire laughed, shoving her playfully. “You’re way too young and pretty to be so old and bitter.”
Riley laughed, shaking her head. “You do realize that made no sense, right?”
“What can I say?” Claire smiled, shrugging her shoulders as she took another sip of her drink. “The tequila’s strong.”
DAY 22 – JANUARY 22ND, 2022 [ FIRST "DATE ]
“For the love of everything that is good and holy, why the hell did you and Jacob think tonight would be a great idea for a double date?” Riley sighed, tugging the ends of her thin sweater sleeves over her hands and bunching the material in her fists before crossing her arms. “Hockey games end at an average of what? Ten o’clock? Assuming they don’t go into an overtime and a shootout.”
“Oh hush,” Claire replied, waving her off. “It was an additional half hour, it won’t kill you if you’re not in bed before midnight for one night. Besides, you’re 24 and in the prime of your youth. I think staying out for a night would do you some good.”
“Some of us have homework and class–”
“In two days, Riley. It’s a Saturday night, you have no responsibilities until Monday morning, so stop complaining.” Claire turned away from Riley, looking down towards the locker room door where Jacob and the rest of the players were set to come out of.
Technically, Claire was right. Riley didn’t have any responsibilities until Monday morning and that’s more in part to the fact that she didn’t even have any homework due, that was just something she blurted out the moment Claire asked her earlier in the day if she would come to the game tonight with her. It didn’t take much budging for Riley to say no, after all, she loved Jacob and having grown up in St. Louis, her family often went to Blues games– so she enjoyed the game as well. However, once they got to the arena and Claire spilled about how they would also be going on a double date as well, with Riley being the other participant in the other couple, the slight good mood she had came crumbling down.
Claire refused to tell her who she was being forced to go on a date with, other than it was someone that she knew of and they knew Riley would be the girl he was on a date with. Halfway through the game, only when Riley threatened to call herself an uber home did Claire tell her that the date was actually one of Jacob’s teammates– a teammate who had expressed interest to Jacob about Riley that night they were all out at the same bar, despite it being girls night. Jacob told Claire and apparently the two of them had talked for a few days, Claire even talking to the teammate before finally agreeing that she was willing to set Riley up on a double AND blind date.
Though she was of course more than willing to from the jump, just like she’s been trying to hook her up with any male she thought she was a great fit for ever since high school. And it was all the same– she’d buy into her plan, go on the date, either liking the guy or he would ruin any potential feelings within seconds by saying something super misogynistic or just overall not being her type and then she’d end the night saying bye and going home by herself.
It was actually quite a process and one that Riley's come to love, because sure, while having an occasional guy in her bed for an hour or two was nice, she was never one to want to actually share her bed. Claire says she has commitment issues, but Riley liked to think of it as not bothering to settle down for any amount of time if she knew the guy was just going to waste it.
Which of course, everytime their parents came to visit or they traveled home on Holidays, meant her love life was often the topic of discussion. But that’s what happens when Claire’s basically on her way to an engagement and Brendan, their younger brother, had finally managed to convince his long time best friend Evelyn to date him.
Riley was the black sheep her parents worried about, wondering whether or not they’d ever see her bring a boyfriend home for Christmas, walk down an aisle and eventually grace them with grandchildren.
“Look, there’s Jacob now,” Claire said, standing up straight from leaning against the wall and waving her hand up slightly in the air to catch his attention.
Riley looked up from the dull arena hall floor to see Claire’s boyfriend of a little over a year, Jacob Markstrom, walking over, half expecting to see whichever teammate the two of them decided to hook her up with for the night. Jacob was nice and their parents loved him from the moment they’d accidentally met him leaving Riley and Claire’s shared apartment when they had only been dating for four months. Riley told Claire she was going to the airport to pick up their parents and yet the moment they all walked up to the door, out came strolling the 6’6” goalie in all his Swedish and slightly hungover glory.
And much to Claire’s embarrassment and Riley’s amusement, their parents invited him out to lunch later that day and they fell in love with him. There isn’t a single text or phone call between their parents where they don’t ask how Jacob’s doing and seeing if he wanted to come over for the holiday or any other small, family event.
“Good game babe,” Claire smiled, immediately walking into the blonde’s arms and giving him a hug. “Proud of you for blocking those shots there in the shootout.”
“If only I could’ve blocked more in regulation, then we wouldn’t have needed an overtime or shootout.” Jacob replied, leaning down and kissing her, keeping his arm on the small of her. “But thank you älskling, I appreciate it.”
“Hey future brother-in-law, is there any way you could tell me who this mystery date of mine is?” Riley sighed, letting her arms drop as she stood up straight. “Claire Bear over here wouldn’t even give me a single hint aside from he’s one of your teammates.”
Jacob laughed, nodding his head and looking down at Claire. “I don’t know, I think I’ve been sworn to secrecy too. But he should’ve been right behind me,”
“I didn’t see him,” Claire shook her head, looking back behind them as more of the players started to file out in groups before looking back at Jacob. “He didn’t change his mind, did he?”
Jacob shook his head. “Not that I’m aware of, he was talking about it before the game and asking how the driving situation would work. I didn’t tell him–”
“You know what? No big deal,” Riley smiled, feeling relieved as she waved them off and dug into her purse to grab her phone. “You guys go ahead and go on the date and I’ll order myself an uber and go back to my–”
“Hey sorry I’m late, I was just giving Meredith the number of some party planner my mom knows out in Boston. I guess she wants to surprise Johnny with a party out there this summer for his birthday.”
Riley looked up from her purse to see the all too familiar face of Matthew Tkachuk, only this time he wasn’t wearing a t-shirt and some jeans like he’d been wearing at the bar. This time he was wearing a suit– a nice navy blue one at that– and had a black coat draped over his arm. Riley would be lying if she said he wasn’t cute in normal clothes, but she would be lying even more if she said seeing him dressed up in a suit made him even more attractive. She won’t even think about seeing him in full uniform, mostly because honestly, she spent the entire night barely paying attention to the game and trying to figure out who her mystery date was.
It turns out it was–
“Him?” She asked, looking at Claire. “He’s my date?”
“Uh,” Matthew chimed in, holding up a hand. “I’m kind of right here.”
Claire turned away from her and towards Matthew. “Sorry for my sister, Matt. Ri can be rude sometimes.”
Riley didn’t miss the sharp change in her tone when Claire had called her rude, and maybe she was. But it was her initial reaction and Claire knew about the bump in at the bar because Riley had told her. She’d even laughed about it– “oh Matthew? He’s harmless. A flirt, but a harmless one.”
And yet here Claire was, setting her sister up on a date with the “harmless flirt” she’d talked about only a little over a week ago.
“Sorry,” Riley replied, looking down at her purse again and bringing her phone out of it, checking the time. “Claire, can we get going? It’s getting kind of late.”
“Of course, let’s get going,” Jacob nodded, looking back at her sister before the two started to walk off, leaving just her and Matthew standing there.
“After you,” Matthew said, motioning for her to walk. Riley crossed her arms again close to her chest as she turned around to follow behind Jacob and Claire, Matthew walking beside her. “I’m sorry if you were expecting someone else.”
“What?”
Matthew nodded ahead of them towards Jacob and Claire. “You seemed like you were expecting someone else.”
Riley felt her cheeks begin to heat up as she adjusted her arms. “No, not at all. I mean, I–”
“You literally said ‘him’ and didn’t look pleased,” Matthew replied, his free hand in his pants pocket as he shrugged. “I’m not offended, I’m just apologizing if they told you something different. Jacob told me you knew.”
“I knew about the double date, and Claire only told me about it once we got to the arena and she knew I wouldn’t pay for an uber back to my apartment with the traffic.” Riley replied, looking ahead of them just as Jacob and Claire seemed to be hiding the fact they took a quick glance behind them. “So I’m sorry if I made you feel bad.”
Matthew laughed and the first thing Riley noticed was his smile. He hadn’t smiled at the bar, not a full one– just a smirky smile, which at the time she thought that maybe was his trick into getting girls to think he’d had feelings for them or was interested in them.
He has a really nice smile.
“Trust me, nothing you could say would make me feel bad,” he replied, shrugging his shoulders. “Between the chirps between my brother and sister– hell, my parents too and then the stuff online, I’ve got some pretty thick skin.”
“Oh yeah, professional hockey player, I forgot,” Riley laughed softly, hugging her arms closer to her again as they caught up to Jacob and Claire and stepped into the garage within the Saddledome where players and employees of the team alike, parked.
“Okay so here’s the thing,” Claire said, clasping her hands together and looking up at Jacob before looking back at her and Matthew. “We forgot we promised to facetime into a call to Jacob’s family. His sister’s got some news to share and wanted everyone to be on a call.”
Riley’s jaw dropped as she stared at her sister, who conveniently was avoiding her gaze. “Claire–”
“But it’s still pretty early so you guys feel free to grab some coffee or a drink, hang out and get to know each other. Just because it’s not a double date, doesn’t mean it still can’t be a date,” Claire smiled, finally looking over in her direction only to be greeted with an ‘I know you had this planned all along’ look from her sister. “Matthew, I trust you to get my sister back to her apartment safely? Or you can just take her back to your place–”
“Claire!” Riley spoke through gritted teeth, blinking obviously at her sister who was already dragging Jacob away from them both.
“Text me in the morning! Have a good night!” Claire smiled, waving at the both of them as Jacob followed behind, he too lifted a large arm to wave his hand in the air.
Riley watched helplessly as they got into his car, turning around to face Matthew once she heard the sound of an engine start. “I am…so, so sorry for that.” She scoffed softly, shaking her head in disbelief. “Claire’s pretty straightforward, but I promise I had no idea she was going to do that. You really don’t have to feel obligated to take me home or anything.”
“It’s fine,” Matthew replied, shaking his head as he pulled his hand out of his pocket and holding onto his keys. “I can take you home if you want to go.”
She felt guilty, partly because she was so embarrassed to have been blatantly left there by her sister and the other half because she knew this isn’t what Matthew had signed up for at all. He was expecting a double date, a double date where the girl knew who she was going out with. He didn’t sign up for a surprise double date or to have said double date crash and then be left with possibly no date and to take his stranded date home.
“If it’s not too much?” Riley finally spoke, feeling uncomfortable with her own guilt. “I promise I don’t live too far away. I’m actually only about five minutes away from where Jacob and Claire live if you know it?”
“I know it,” he nodded, motioning again for her to start walking as he walked beside her. “Claire’s quite the host when it comes to team stuff. The Thanksgiving they held at their place this year was pretty fun. Though, you weren’t there I don’t think.”
“That’s right, I forgot she did that,” Riley nodded in reply. “I went home since I didn’t have any classes, but I remember her saying she and a few others were going to do something. But yeah, Claire’s quite the hostess. Life of the party even.”
“She’s something,” Matthew nodded, quickening his pace just a little before coming to a stop by a black Audi SUV and opening the passenger door. “I started the car once we entered the garage, so it should be warmer here.”
“Oh,” Riley was caught off guard. Despite the action itself being bottom of the barrel of what men were expected to do, Riley truly couldn’t remember the last time any date she had, had opened any door for her…not just a car door. “Thank you.”
Matthew just nodded in reply and waited for her to get into the car before he checked to make sure her feet or her purse weren’t hanging out so he could close the door. And though he could’ve taken his time to walk around, she watched him walk around the back of his car with a sort of urgency, not leaving her alone inside for long before he was opening the driver door and ducking into the car.
He fiddled with the radio for a bit before picking up an aux cord and offering it up to her. “You’re more than welcome to have the aux. I’m not all too picky with music.”
“Are you sure?” Riley asked, looking at him to see if she could spot any sign of him changing his mind.
“Absolutely, you can have it,” he said, handing the cord over.
Riley took it from his hand and plugged it into her phone, unlocking it and opening her music library. “Any requests?”
“Just whatever you want to play,” he said, looking away from her as he put his seatbelt on and then put his car into reverse.
She felt nervous sitting there in his car and she didn’t know if it was because she was sitting in the car of someone who was basically a stranger to her, or because of the kind of date setting. It took everything in her not to physically move in her seat to try to get the nerves out, so instead she just endlessly scrolled through her music library, not even picking a song.
“My family and I play this game when it comes to what songs to play, that way there’s not one person who’s picking all the songs,” she said, breaking the silence as she looked at him.
“What’s that?” He asked, sneaking a look at her before maintaining his focus on backing out of his parking spot to eventually straighten up and leave the garage.
“We each took turns picking a letter and a number. Whatever letter someone picks, you’ll scroll down to the number they picked and then that’s the song.”
“Okay, I got it,” Matthew nodded, looking at her as he pulled out of the garage. “B 163.”
Riley stared at him, blinking once or twice. “In what universe would you ever think I have 163 songs that start with the letter B?”
“I don’t know, I just went with a random mix,” he shrugged, looking at her. “So do you?”
“Maybe.” She knew she did. So she just bit back the smile that was trying to reveal her cards and looked back down at her phone, scrolling to the B’s and then starting to count.
Matthew pulled out into the street as she reached 90 and saw she was passing some pretty great songs, and made mental notes of what numbers they were…which was technically cheating, but her brother did it all the time.
158…right? Wait yeah 158…159….160….161….162….Oh no.
This could either go one of two ways– he could hear the song and enjoy it, or he could look at her like she was just a 12-year-old who never grew up and speed the entire way to drop her off at her own apartment, just so he could get her out of the car.
Wait? Isn’t that what she wanted?
Not wasting another moment, she took a deep breath and pressed the song, closing her eyes to prepare for whatever critique Matthew was going to hurl her way.
She looked at him from the corner of her eye as the piano started to play from the speakers, only giving him a second of instrumental before the vocals picked up and giving away just what song was playing.
“We’re soarin’, flyin’, there’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach. If we’re tryin’, so we’re breaking free…”
“Is this High School Musical?” He smiled, looking at her as they pulled up to a stoplight.
“Yeah,” she replied, smiling sheepishly as she rubbed her arm. “My music library’s kind of all over the place and sometimes I like listening to the old Disney classics.”
He laughed, nodding his head as he reached out and turned the volume dial up just a little. “I remember watching this when it came out. I was always a hockey player, but that’s when I discovered that maybe I wasn’t exactly a basketball player.”
“Oh God, why can I see you dressed up as Troy Bolton for Halloween?” Riley laughed, looking at him.
Matthew’s face scrunched up as she shook his head. “Oh hell no, never. I was always a hockey player for Halloween, never the same one unless it was my Dad. But my brother and I switched each year on who got to be him.” He looked over at her with that same smirk from the bar. “But I do know the words to the song.”
“Go on then,” Riley smiled, motioning towards the radio. “Sing it.”
Matthew cleared his throat as he turned the music down just barely, as if the difference in volume would make a difference in whether or not she’d be able to hear him sing. “We’re soarin’, flyin’, there’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach. If we’re tryin’, yeah we’re breaking free–”
“Okay, no, no,” Riley laughed, reaching out and turning the volume way down as Matthew laughed. “I’m sorry, but I can not have you butchering the musical stylings of Troy and Gabriella like that.”
“Hey, I’m not that bad of a singer!”
“Yeah, it’s cute that you try.”
The car rolled to a stop as the song continued to play quietly, Matthew tapping his fingers on the top of his steering wheel and chewing the inside of his cheek as he stared ahead at the red light, waiting for it to turn green. “I normally stay up a little bit after games because it takes me some time to wind down, and the coffee shop I usually go to is on the way to your apartment…” He looked at her, and even Riley wasn’t oblivious to the nerves written all over his face. “Would you want to stop and grab something to drink maybe?”
“I could go for a hot chocolate or something,” Riley nodded, looking at him.
“Okay, cool,” Matthew smiled, looking back towards the light as it turned green and kept driving.
It turns out that the coffee shop Matthew had mentioned, was only a few blocks up ahead from where they had been. They were closing soon and Matthew asked if she would be okay with staying in the car while he went to grab their drinks, just so she didn’t have to walk out into the cold January air. He stayed nearby, making sure she locked it once he had left and then Riley watched through the passenger window as he walked into the coffee shop with the same urgency as he had when he walked around his car.
She knew of Matthew only because of living in the city of Calgary who took their hockey very seriously. Plus, her sister was dating their goalie and Riley had tagged along to some events and nights out with the girlfriends and wives of players. Most importantly, his dad was treasured back home in her hometown of St. Louis, having played there during the years where she and her family had gone to games. But never in her entire life had she crossed paths with Matthew or his family– not until she moved to Calgary, not until Claire started dating Jacob, and most definitely not until last week at the bar or this moment right now sitting in his car, waiting for him to come back with their hot drinks.
Riley saw Matthew place money in a tip jar before turning back around with two drinks in hand. Once she saw he was at her door, she rolled the window down to take the drinks from him and placed them into the cupholder before unlocking the car so he could get back into the car.
“So I know I said I’d take you home, but can I show you something first?” He asked, picking up one of the drinks and handing it to her. “They’re both hot chocolate by the way, so you don’t have to take this one.”
“No it’s fine,” she replied, taking the cup. “And I mean…sure? I guess I’m not really all that tired right now.”
“Cool. I promise it’s not too far, it’s actually just around the corner,” he smiled, putting the car into park and peeling into the street before continuing to drive.
She sat in the passenger seat, sipping on her hot chocolate as Matthew continued the drive, eventually pulling into the parking garage of an apartment complex that Riley had considered moving into herself shortly before moving out of her and Claire’s shared apartment. They drove up to the second level before finally finding a spot, Matthew pulling into it and putting the car into park.
“It’s just a little bit of a walk, but not much, I promise,” Matt said, looking at her before opening his car door and getting out.
Riley followed suit, making sure she had her phone, purse and hot chocolate before closing the passenger door and walking towards the end of the car. “I actually considered moving here a year ago.”
“Really?” Matthew asked, standing by the trunk and waiting for her to be beside him before they started walking. “Too bad you didn’t. Maybe we could’ve been neighbors.”
Riley snorted, shaking her head as she took a long sip of her hot chocolate. “That’s doubtful. I don’t have NHL money.”
Matthew stopped just ahead of her and stood in her way, holding out his hand and motioning for her. “Here, put this on,” he held his coat out as he nodded at her drink in her hand. “I’ll hold your drink.”
“Oh, it’s really no–”
“I’ve at least got a long sleeve shirt and a jacket on to keep me warm, you’ve got…whatever kind of sweater that is.” He moved the winter coat again, “just take it, you’ll need it I promise.”
Instead of arguing with him, Riley just sighed and nodded and handed over her hot chocolate before taking the black winter coat he’d had draped over his arm at the arena, unfolding it and putting it on, buttoning only the middle button so it wouldn’t stay open. “There, I’m a little warmer now.”
“Good, because Claire would kill me if I let you freeze to death I’m sure.” He replied, handing her back her drink before nodding his head back. “Come on, I’ll take you to what I wanted to show you.”
“As long as I’m in my own bed by midnight and you’re not going to turn me into the next inspiration for a Criminal Minds episode when they come back with their reboot, then okay.”
She walked alongside him as he scanned a key fob to get into the building, once again Matthew holding the door open for her and allowing her to walk in first before following just behind her and nodding his head to his left. “The elevator right here.”
“So what’s this thing you want to show me?” She asked, waiting for him to close the door behind him.
“It’s a surprise,” he replied, making sure the door closed behind him before walking over and nodding at the elevator button. “You should feel special because I don’t show this spot to just anyone.” He looked at her with that same playful smirk.
Riley pressed the button, signaling for the elevator to come to the floor they were on and when the double doors opened, they both walked into the elevator, Matthew pressing the close doors button as well as the button at the top of them all that had only say T. As the elevator started to move, Riley leisurely sipped on her hot chocolate, Matthew doing the same as they waited for the elevator to come to a stop.
“I’m not sleeping with you,” she chimed, the words she meant to say earlier when he brought up going somewhere else instead of taking her right home, finally coming out. “I meant what I said about being back in my own bed by midnight.”
“Relax,” he laughed, rolling his eyes. “My mom raised me right, you know.”
“Oh, so you’re telling me you’ve never had a one night stand? Mr. makes a million dollars a year, basically the face of a franchise and NHL player?” Her voice dripped with sarcasm as she brought the cup back up to her lips.
When the elevator stopped and the doors opened, Matthew stepped towards the doors, holding his arm out in front of them and waving for her to walk through. “Actually I’m earning nine million this year,” he replied, tilting his head to the side as he took a sip of his hot chocolate and sighing. “And I’m hardly the face of a franchise, that’s Johnny. And no, I didn’t say that, just come on will you?”
She followed his directions, stepping off of the elevator and back out into the cold January air. “Where are we?” She asked, holding her hot chocolate closer to her chest as she heard the elevator doors close behind her.
“I found it when I moved in,” he said, nodding at her to follow him as he started to walk away from the elevator and down the wheelchair ramp. “The owner of the complex doesn’t advertise it when people check into living here, mainly because it has no standing on the rent.”
There were small posts that hung garden lights from around them, dimly lighting the space they were on. As Riley looked around, she noticed a different variety of lounge chairs– the kinds you could find in gardens, on front porches or even poolside. She could see off to their left, was what looked to be a small garden, though again the light that the garden lights hung around the seating area didn’t really show all that much. She could, however, see the fire pit that sat in the center of all of the chairs, letting her know that this must be some kind of hang out spot for the complex. Maybe if she had looked deeper into this complex when she was searching for a new apartment, she might’ve known about it.
“Over there’s a small community garden, I think there’s a few vegetables and spices, but really it’s only flowers. I asked the owner about it when I came up here one day after drunk pressing the wrong floor and he said he puts a place like this on all of his properties, in memory of his wife who died of breast cancer because she loved to garden.” Matthew walked away from the garden and just passed some of the chairs before coming to a stop on the other side of the rooftop, where there were no dim garden lights. “The whole terrace is supposed to be a kind of place where people can come out and relax, clear their minds, you know? But I’ve never seen anyone come up here.”
“Maybe because it’s cold,” Riley said, walking up next to him and leaning her arms against the ledge of the terrace.
Matthew rolled his eyes and rested his hot chocolate on the ledge. “You don’t say?”
“Just pointing out the obvious is all,” she smiled, taking another sip of her hot chocolate as she looked towards the other side of the terrace. “The idea of it is nice though, I like it. Plus the view,” she blew out a low whistle as she looked back out towards downtown Calgary. “It’s beautiful. I can only imagine what it looks like during the day.”
“I like it better at night,” Matthew replied, tapping his fingers against his cup as he shrugged. “It helps clear my mind a bit after games.”
“Only if you’re not going out with the boys, right?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Right,” he laughed, nodding his head as he took a sip of his hot chocolate and shrugged. “It kind of reminds me of looking out of the airplane window when you’re flying at night, you know? Seeing all the lights from the buildings in the city you’re flying over and how there’s a whole city of people who are living their lives individually. It makes you realize just how big the world is.”
Riley let a few moments of silence pass as she let her cooling down hot chocolate cup try to warm up her hands before she nodded and looked at him. “Wow…that was deep for a hockey player.”
He laughed and shook his head as he kept his eyes out towards the cityscape, opening his mouth to say something, only to pause and stand up straight from his leaning stature, pointing ahead of him. “Wait, look!”
Riley raised an eyebrow as she looked out over the city lights and out towards the far away, dark horizon. “What?”
“This is going to sound ridiculous, but I swear I saw a shooting star,” Matthew kept his gaze out ahead of him for a few more seconds before he let his hand drop and he looked at her. “Like…no bullshit it moved.”
“Orrrrr,” she dragged out, looking at him. “Maybe it was an airplane.”
“Moving that fast? Really?”
“You never know with guys like Elon Musk trying to build crazy shit and defy the inevitable every second of every day,” she replied, bringing her cup back up to her lips as she turned back towards the city.
Matthew let the silence settle between them, though she could still feel his gaze on her and his body being turned towards her as well. “You’re a lot different than your sister…”
“Says you and every other person who’s walked into our lives.” Riley shrugged, holding her cup with both hands. “Claire’s a lot more…hopeful, she likes to see the petter picture of options and I’m more–”
“Of a cynical bitch?” Riley almost choked on her sip of air, rather than hot chocolate seeing as she hadn’t tipped her cup far enough yet, and when she looked at Matthew, he was looking at her with wide eyes. “Sorry…are we not at that level of friendship yet?”
This time she laughed as she placed her cup down onto the ledge and nodded. “Actually, I was going to say the same thing.”
“So…why is that?” He asked, reaching out and gripping his fingers onto the concrete ledge as he leaned himself backwards, almost as if he was stretching his arms. “You guys are what? Only a little over a year apart?”
“You said you have a brother right?” She asked, as he nodded in reply. “Are you and your brother the same person?”
“Well…kind of?” He replied, shrugging. “But he can get a little more crazy than me. Plus he’s got that whole middle child thing going on, so he always needs to be the center of attention.”
“Hey, I’m a middle child,” Riley faked offense, reaching out and nudging his arm.
“You said it, not me.” Matthew smiled, tilting his head to the side. “But really…siblings having their individual personalities aside…you guys aren’t that far apart in age, so I guess I just figured you’d be a little bit alike, you know”
“I don’t know,” Riley took a deep breath and sighed as she shrugged her shoulders and looked at him. “Claire will say it’s because of my Junior year prom date standing me up and going to prom with his ex-girlfriend– why are you doing that?”
“Doing what?” He asked, trying to fight back the knowing smirk that was already present on his face.
“Smirking,” she said, turning her body towards him and waving at his face. “You’re smirking and nodding like you just figured something out.”
“More like figured you out,” he replied, pulling himself closer to the ledge before letting go of the concrete and bringing his arms into his chest as he rested them on the ledge and leaned against them. “And I don’t think you’re as cynical as you think or want people to think you are. I just think you’re scared.”
“Yeah, well, you don’t know me.”
“No,” he replied, looking over at her. “But I’d like to…get to know you.”
Riley squinted as she held her arms closer to her and leaned against the ledge, almost copying him. “Why?”
“Well for one, I think it’s cool we’re from the same city–”
“Technically state, because you’re from boujee Chesterfield.”
“And second…I think you’re funny and I definitely liked how you were at the club.”
“Ohhhh,” Riley smiled, nodding at him. “So you liked how I didn’t fall for your little pick up routine, right? Let me guess…you like the challenge?”
Matthew didn’t smile or put that smirk on like she thought he would, like most men would the moment the challenge of picking up a woman was brought up. Instead he just stuck out his bottom lip partially and shrugged. “I don’t see you as a challenge because you’re a person…but you’ve piqued my interest and I’d like to get to know you better. Plus your sister’s dating my teammate so.”
Riley turned back towards him and leaned her left arm on the railing. “Well I hate to break it to you Matthew, but I really don’t see this happening. Relationships and I don’t really do well–”
“Oh? So you admit it?” He asked, raising both eyebrows as he turned towards her. “You want a relationship?”
“I– no, that’s not–” Riley huffed in frustration as soon as she saw him smile and then rolled her eyes in an effort to keep her own smile at bay. “Fine.”
“Fine what?”
“I’ll let you consider this our first date,” she replied, nodding at him before curling her upper lip slightly. “Though it’s not looking too good that you spent the first near two hours of our date smashing other guys into boards, plus the extra thirty minutes of waiting after…and not to mention you didn’t even give me a puck.”
Matthew laughed, a deep, belly laugh as he head leaned back just slightly before nodding and looking at her. “Okay, so I’ll have to make the second date better then. Don’t worry, I got it.”
“Wow. Already giving up on this one that you think it’s going to end badly? What? Afraid I’ll tell my sister how bad of a kisser you are when you try to kiss me tonight?”
That stupid smirk returned as he stood himself up straight and turned to her. Riley wanted to do nothing more than to kiss it off of his stupid lips and by the way he looked at her, he knew it too. “That’s the thing, I’m not kissing you tonight. Come on, let me take you home.”
“And why not?” Riley’s eyebrows furrowed as she grabbed her hot chocolate and followed behind him back towards the chairs. “Am I not kissable?”
He laughed again, finishing off his hot chocolate before tossing it into the trashcan, holding the slot open for her as she finished what remained of hers and tossed it in as well. “Oh no, you’re definitely kissable and I’m fighting every urge right now not to kiss you.” He led them up to the elevator and he pressed the button. “But my mom always taught me not to kiss on the first date.”
Riley hugged her arms closer to her, starting to feel the Calgary chill as the wind started to pick up. If she wasn’t so cold, she was sure that the shock of his statement would be frozen all over her face. Here he was, a 24-year-old bachelor living in a city that praised the ice he skated on. He’d had one night stands, he told her that, and yet she wouldn’t…couldn’t wrap her mind around the fact Matthew Tkachuk…didn’t kiss on the first date?
“I-well..that’s…” she paused, unsure of how to play off her shock despite her already failing so miserably to do so. “Sweet.”
Matthew smiled, nodding his head. “And if you let me take you home so you don’t freeze to death, I guarantee you’ll learn more about me on our second date…and maybe get a kiss at the end of that too.”
Riley scoffed, shaking her head and standing up straight as the elevator doors opened. “I’m not cold.”
“Say that to the shivering sound of your teeth when you were doubting my shooting star,” he reached out and rested his hand on the small of her back, nudging her into the warmth of the elevator first, keeping it there as he walked into the elevator himself, removing it once they were both inside of the elevator and he pressed the button of the floor they needed to go to and her back pressed against the elevator wall.
It didn’t matter though. She felt the warmth of his hand against her skin through both his jacket and her flimsy sweater the rest of the elevator ride, the car ride back to her apartment and when she was lying in her own bed.
At 11:59.
DAY 43 – FEBRUARY 12TH, 2022 [ IT'S OFFICIAL ]
How the hell did I get here?
That’s a question Riley found herself asking herself anytime that she woke up in Matthew’s apartment. Whether that was on his couch or in his bed, she always wondered. And the question wasn’t asked in a “I got too drunk last night how the hell did I get here” way, it was more of a “how the hell did I end up waking up in the apartment of a man, most of the time not hungover or after a wild night out– but instead after receiving the text of ‘just landed, not tired, feel like coming over to watch a movie?’” Kind of way.
Only a handful of times in the last three weeks has she found herself waking up in his apartment with her head throbbing, her mouth dry from drinking and the taste of her drunken meal lingering in her morning breath. The rest of the time she’s woken up from falling asleep on the couch watching a movie or a show one of his teammates or his friends from home or his siblings suggested he watched, waking up in his bed curled up beneath his heavy comforter with her head sharing the space with his on his all-time favorite pillow.
But no matter how she ended up at his apartment or the circumstances behind how she fell asleep and where, the two things that were consistent every single time, were her wearing one of his shirts and that she always woke up with his arms wrapped around her. Unless, like this morning, he somehow woke up before her and she was greeted to an empty bed. But the smell of food and the sound of running water and pans clinking echoing from behind his closed bedroom door told her exactly where he was and what he was doing.
Riley got out of bed, turning towards the mattress and making her side of the bed up and looking up to see that he had already done it, even though he’s always made a joke at how the first thing she does when she wakes up in the morning is make the bed– even if he’s still in it. She walked over to his dresser, opening the third drawer which she knew had his gym shorts in it and pulled out a black pair before closing the drawer and then putting the shorts on, rolling the waistband once before opening his bedroom door and walking out into his apartment, immediately seeing him standing in his kitchen by the stove, his back facing her.
She walked over, feeling the cool of the wooden floor beneath her feet as she made her way through both the living room and dining room and into the kitchen, the tile even colder. She came up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist and standing up on her toes to rest her chin on his shoulder. “Whatcha doing?”
“Well good morning sleeping beauty,” Matt laughed, looking at her and lifting his right arm up to let her move under it so she was resting against his side. “I didn’t think you’d be getting up for another hour.”
“Mm, I smelled breakfast,” she smiled, looking up at him and leaning up to kiss him before turning back and snuggling into his side. “Which I assume you’re making for yourself?”
“Ha ha, no,” he replied, rolling his eyes as he carefully switched the spatula from his right hand to his left and flipped the omelet. “I was actually going to surprise you with breakfast in bed. But seeing as you’re awake now, do you think you can go ahead and crack the eggs and scramble them for me so I can make mine once yours is done?”
“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “I kind of like the idea of breakfast in bed, sounds super romantic actually. Almost–” she paused as the word froze in her throat. Domesticated. ‘Almost domesticated’ is what she was going to say, but she couldn’t…wouldn’t, really.
Sure, it’s already been almost three weeks since that failed blind double date, turned…sort of first date for her and Matthew and maybe by now, especially with as often as they talked and how much time they spent together between her classes and his schedule, including just how many times post game they tagged along to a late dinner with Claire and Jacob or another player and their significant other…they never had a talk about being official. A “what are we” conversation has definitely happened, Matthew first brought it up one month in, stating that he didn’t want to just be a hook-up, but also wasn’t sure if he wanted a relationship yet and her stance was the same. The conversation ended with no solid answer, but they both decided to continue with…whatever this was anyway.
Because then, she wasn’t quite sure what she wanted. A relationship was…a possibility in the cards, but at that point in time it didn’t feel like she could truly open herself up to one, especially one with him. Yet here she was, almost two months later and the word ‘domesticated’ almost came out of her mouth to describe the very action Matthew was doing– making them breakfast.
And for the first time since high school, she wanted to be in a relationship. More importantly, she wanted to be in one with him…but she’d gone along with not wanting a relationship he brought up first, so maybe it would be best to just play along with whatever they were doing until Matthew changed his mind.
And hopefully he changed his mind.
“Riles?”
“Hm?” She asked, shaking her head slightly before looking up at him.
“The eggs?”
“Oh, yeah, sure,” she nodded, unwrapping her arms from his waist and walking over to the fridge.
“Did I lose you there for a second?” He laughed, flipping the omelet again before picking up the pan and tilting it, letting the omelete slide onto the plate. “You kinda paused there.”
“Oh no, just…brain fart, you know?” She laughed, grabbing two more eggs from the fridge before closing it, walking behind him and to his left where the bowl he’d previously used was. “I was just going to say that it was almost enough to make me really like you is all.”
Matthew snorted, nodding his head as he sprayed the pan again with some pam. “So what does that mean? You only like me?”
Riley looked over her right shoulder with a playful smile and shrugged. “Eh.”
“Eh?” He mimicked, shaking his head. “Does this mean I can cancel our having no plans and go out and catch up with the rest of the guys out at the simulated golf course today?”
She immediately turned around, eyes wide as she shook her head. “Wait no, you said we could just stay in today and relax since we’re going to that big super bowl party tomorrow,” she started to pout as he walked over to her, taking the eggs from her hands. “We were supposed to start One Tree Hill today.”
Matthew cracked an egg and dropped it into the bowel before tossing the shell into the sink, shrugging as he pouted. “Eh.”
“Matthew–” Riley barely spoke before he looked at her with that stupid smirk that always made her stomach fill with butterflies. He was never going to cancel their day in, he was only messing with her. She nudged him away, taking the remaining egg back and cracking it into the bowl. “You suck.”
He leaned in and kissed her cheek while simultaneously taking the bowl from her and handing her the plate with her omelete on it. “Eat your breakfast, I’ve already got the bread in the toaster so all you’ll need to do it toast it and butter it.”
Riley walked over to the toaster, pushing down the slots and then left her plate in front of it before moving just a little way over and pulling herself up onto the counter. “So…”
She paused again as she stared at the back of him, adding the cheese and spinach into his omelete. Again, she was asking herself the same ‘how the hell did I get here?’ Question that she’s been asking herself for weeks now. How, in the actual hell, did she go from cynical, romance is gross, jokingly telling Claire and Jacob to at least warn her before they were going to kiss in her presence, never getting the big hype about rom-com movies…to this? To waking up in bed with Matthew in mornings after nights where sometimes all they did was lounge on the couch and watch a new Netflix suggestion? To knowing her way around his apartment like she did her own? She had products in his shower, his clothes were hers, she kept a pair of shoes over here, he had almond milk in the fridge for her and her favorite cereal mingled in with his own. To him making her breakfast and planning on greeting her in bed with it?
It almost felt surreal, her entire situation. How did it all happen so fast, practically In the blink of an eye– like all of the rom-com’s Claire loved to watch every weekend– and she never even noticed it?
“Sooo?” Matthew echoed, bringing her back into reality as he looked over his shoulder. “Care to finish that thought?”
“I was just going to ask if you were prepared to enjoy the amazing, legendary show of One Tree Hill? And also that you can’t watch it without me, because I need to see your reaction to the most pinnacle stuff.”
“Is it really that legendary if I’ve never heard of it?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked over at her.
Riley rolled her eyes as their pieces of toast popped up. “Considering your only interests in life when the show was on air was hockey and oh wait…hockey!” She nudged herself off of the counter and smiled at him. “I would be surprised if you have heard of it.”
“Hey, I like to think that interest in hockey paid off, hm?” He said, turning the stove off before placing his omelete onto his plate.
“All I know is that if you’re on the wrong Scott’s brother team, I don’t know if we can be friends,” she said, taking the lid off of the butter and starting to butter the pieces of toast.
“Ouch, first I’m demoted to like and now we might not be friends?” He playfully scoffed as she put the toast onto his plate and cut it. “I guess I better not mess this up huh?” He whispered into her ear before kissing her temple and then grabbing both of their plates just as she put her toast onto her own. “Now come on, we’ve got hill trees to watch.”
“Tree Hill!” She groaned, taking the butter and putting it into the fridge. “It’s called One Tree Hill!”
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, shooting her a smile over his shoulder. “Now come on, it’s time to start our day of relaxing.”
And they did. They had breakfast together, starting season one, episode one of One Tree Hill at 10:30 am…and almost twelve hours later and every bathroom break, pause to answer a question and door dash delivery in between…they were on season one, episode eighteen with five more episodes left of the first season.
For Riley, it was one of her personal favorite episodes– the Boy Toy charity auction episode– and despite Matthew thinking (and complaining) it was because of Nathan Scott walking out onto the stage and taking off his jacket to reveal ‘boy toy’ written across his very impressive abs– “I might not have a six pack but I’m better.” “He’s Nathan Scott…”– it was actually because of the growth Nathan shows and then the development of the lives of the other characters and the relationships.
Still…Nathan Scott shirtless also wasn’t that bad of a sight.
But right there on the couch was where they spent their entire day, lounging around in different positions unless it came to eating food, then they both sat up, but once they were done they went back down into whatever position they’d been lying in prior. And right now, the position they were lying in and had been lying in for the better half of the last two episodes since they finished dinner, had them both sharing the chaise of Matthew’s sectional sofa. Matthew was laying the full length of it, while Riley was too, except she had her head rested in his lap and her body curled up as she laid on her right side, her head resting on his right thigh where his hands had been alternating between playing with her hair or just simply running his fingers through it.
The fact that their entire day had been spent lounging around together and more specifically, that small action of him playing with her hair, wasn’t helping her brain to keep from focusing on the domestic dilemma they were in…or maybe it was just her, because Matthew looked like he had nothing going on except for everything in the moment. The dire need to know just what exactly their situation was, was bouncing around in her head so much, that she had completely missed the last five minutes of the episode, not realizing it until she felt him reach out with his right hand to grab the remote beside him.
‘What are we doing?” She asked, looking up at him.
“Um…watching the next episode of One Tree Hill?” He replied, looking confused as he paused the tv. “Unless you don’t want to?”
She felt her face heat up at the bluntness of her question without any context and Matthew must have been able to tell she was embarrassed about something, because he motioned for her to move closer to him as he sat himself up against the back of the couch. Riley felt like a puppy with its tail between its legs as she pushed herself up and carefully moved so not to lean too much against his lap, and ended up laying down between him and the arm of the couch.
“Are you tired? Do you want to go to bed?” He asked, nodding towards the tv. “Or did I completely misread your question?”
“I mean…I wasn’t really all that straightforward with what I meant,” she spoke nervously, her left hand resting on the material of his t-shirt and playing with the ripples in the fabric.
“I’m still not sure what we’re talking about here…” He replied, his eyebrows furrowing as he rolled the remote in his hand.
Riley took a deep breath and exhaled, pushing herself up onto her right hand as she leaned back against the arm rest. “I know…we talked about how this isn’t really an exclusive hook-up situation, but you also don’t know if you want a relationship right now and I don’t know. I have products in your bathroom, I keep an extra pair of shoes here, you’ve got some stuff at my place.”
She looked up from her twiddling hands and sighed, shrugging her shoulders. “I guess I just want to know what we are, because Claire’s got a big mouth and no doubt has told them something or referred to you as my boyfriend and I just really need to know what to tell my parents and well…everyone else when they ask…I guess?”
Matthew just stared at her and every passing second felt like it was dragging on and the longer he stayed silent, the more embarrassed she felt and wanted to play it off as if she was just sleep talking- though she knew that he wouldn’t believe it for a second.
“Okay,” he cleared his throat, readjusting his posture as he tried to turn his body more towards her. “I mean…I was going to wait till after Valentine’s Day to ask if you wanted to make it more official, because I know you hate Valentine’s Day–”
“I don’t hate Valentine’s Day,” Riley scoffed, rolling her eyes. “I just think it can be super cheesy sometimes, plus the whole,” she waved her hand aimlessly, “going all out on one day of the year and putting half-assed effort into a relationship the other 364 days is dumb.”
Matthew held back a smile as he looked at her. “Wanna date?”
Her face deadpanned as she looked at the now beaming Matthew, her heart racing within her chest. “Really? You ask like that?”
“Just kidding, but I’m also dead serious,” he replied, dropping the remote in his lap as he held onto one of her hands. “I’ve been really enjoying…whatever this has been the last two months, and I know I said I wasn’t sure if I was ready for a relationship…but I’m pretty sure now that I do. So do you want to change this,” he motioned between them with his free hand before resting his left arm back over the back of the couch. “Into us dating…officially?”
Now Riley was the one who sat there staring at him, only her mouth was slightly opened and the word, though she was dying to say it, sat there frozen on the tip of her tongue. “Riles? Now would uh…be a good time to answer?”
“Yeah?” She finally replied, before nodding her head as an unsure look crossed his face. “Yes, I mean yes.”
Matthew smiled and leaned in, pressing her against the arm of the couch as he kissed her before pulling back and looking at her. “I was going to do this the whole romantic way, you know? Flowers, chocolates, take you out to a nice dinner and I know you’re not a big fan of it, but will you also be my Valentine?”
Riley playfully scoffed as she rolled her eyes, leaning forward and pressing her nose against his. “If I must.” She kissed him again before pulling away and then patting his thigh. “Now back to One Tree Hill, we’ve got four more episodes and then we’ve finished season one.”
“Four?” He sighed, leaning his head back as she crawled back between his legs, laying back to where she was before. “We’re sleeping on the couch tonight aren’t we?”
She looked back at him with a smile and shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time. Besides, we have no plans until the afternoon, we’ll get some sleep.”
Matthew picked the remote back up and started the next episode before resting it back down onto the couch beside him. He reached forward, tugging on the blanket that she was using and making sure she was covered up enough before she felt him sink back down into the couch. Riley tried hard not to let the butterflies she was feeling in her stomach turn into her own self feeling antsy as she laid there thinking about the reactions of Claire and the rest of the WAGs tomorrow when they found out that Matthew and she had finally decided to date. And then she couldn’t stop her mind from spiraling about her parents, other friends, would things change between them or would the relaxing hangouts feel like more needed to be happening? All of this was so new to her. The last time she had a “boyfriend” was in seventh grade– and who really counted those? That wasn’t this– this was so different, this was–
And as if he knew she was starting to spiral inside of her own head, Matthew started to play with her hair again, alternating between running his fingers through her hair or rubbing her hair back and out of her forehead. Soon, the worried thoughts about what their current relationship would, should or could turn into and she felt her body relax into the couch and into Matthew as she watched the show on the tv in front of them. And when her body relaxed, her eyes did too and she found it hard to keep them open long enough to retain what was actually taking place.
She’d seen One Tree Hill all the way through multiple times, so she knew all about what happened in this episode. But it was the thought of experiencing it for the first time with Matthew that kept making her open her eyes despite the time in between getting longer and longer each time. But when she felt Matthew tug the blanket up just over her shoulders, brush the hair away from her face and lean down and kiss her temple, before sitting back up. She half expected him to pause the show and switch it to something else since she knew he wasn’t really all that tired.
Yet the last thing she remembered hearing was Nathan telling Haley he fell in love with her, meaning he had stuck with watching the episode even after he knew she’d stopped paying attention. And she could’ve sworn she heard the all too familiar opening of Gavin Degraw’s “I Don’t Want to Be” right before she really fell asleep, and the feeling of Matthew’s fingers still playing in her hair.
Calming the rapidness of the butterflies in her stomach’s wings…to nothing but a small flutter, leaving her feeling all warm inside.
DAY 69 – MARCH 10TH, 2022 [ ARGUMENTS AND LATE NIGHT APOLOGIES ]
In both aspects, it would be right to say that just like their relationship, things were picking up fast in their day to day lives. For Riley, the end of her final semester of college was only two some months away and she found her days filled with coffee, power naps, study sessions with her classmates or Kelsey, papers and of course, Calgary Flames home games. For Matthew, the end of the season was approaching fast and it was he and everyone of his teammate’s mission to make it into the postseason after missing out the year before. This year felt like maybe they could do it, find the redemption from the 2020 bubble playoffs where they imploded.
Yet despite the chaos going on in their lives, everything in regards to their relationship felt almost too good to be true. Riley found herself staying over at Matthew’s apartment more often than her own, and on the nights when she would leave campus late and was too tired to make the drive to his, he’d drive over to hers and stay with her. They’d cook dinner together or order take-out, talk about their days and listen as the other vented about whatever it was that was on their mind or bothering them, then they’d either watch tv and fall asleep on the couch or go find some sort of solace in a bedroom.
Tonight was going to be the same as the last two weeks as well. Riley would go to class while Matthew went to morning skate, he’d go through his daily routine while she stayed on campus for other classes and hiding away in the library to try her best to knock out her homework and get a little more of her paper down. Then she’d meet up with Claire and Kelsey at Claire’s apartment and then they’d go to Saddledome for the game. It felt like any other night, really– but Matthew was stressing, despite Riley telling him that he didn’t need to.
“We’re playing Tampa, Riles. Everyone expects them to win because they’re back to back cup champs. It’s a big game.” Was what he said anytime over the phone or in text that she told him he just needed to relax and play his game.
Kelsey had left the library an hour earlier than planned so she could go home and have a dinner with Oscar before he left for the arena. While Riley stayed back in the reserved study room, stressing over her paper when she got an email from her professor that was sent to their entire class talking about how they needed to make an office appointment with her to present a second rough draft of their oral presentation.
The most important presentation of her life that she absolutely needed to pass in order to pass her Capstone and achieve her degree.
She probably should have left then. Followed the advice that she’d been giving Matthew for the last few hours and gone to her apartment to relax. Instead, she stayed in the study room and tried to balance her focus between her paper and her presentation. Her focus was by no means balanced evenly between the two, considering she spent a nice fifteen minute break in between crying over the stress before diving back into her notes and trying to wrap up her paper…and then the yawns came, which was maybe another time she should’ve decided to go home and rest before the game.
But she did was she always did whenever she found herself getting tired while studying. She set a short alarm to wake her up in ten minutes, the perfect power nap, and then she’d finish whatever she could before she’d leave for her apartment to get dressed and then meet up with Kelsey and Claire.
Except…that’s not how it happened. Instead of waking up ten minutes later, she woke up almost two hours later to her phone vibrating against the table and her face. She fully woke up the moment the call ended, practically jumping out of her seat when she saw the time and all of the notifications that she had from Matt, Claire and Kelsey. And then she saw the time.
The game had started 30 minutes ago.
She quickly collected all of her stuff and left the study room, rushing through the library while simultaneously ordering her uber to the arena, hoping that she’d get there with time to spare. Thankfully, she didn’t have to wait long for an uber before she was on her way to the stadium, digging through her purse for the family lanyard and ticket Matt had given her when she came home for lunch. And after begging the arena staff to let her bring her backpack in and she was willing to drop it off with security just as long as they’d let her bring it in– she was allowed to do it, but it took quite the convincing with the security managers.
By the time she reached the seats where she saw Claire, Kelsey and a few of the other WAGs sitting, she was out of breath, felt extremely disheveled and probably looked like she was crazy.
“Where the hell have you been?” Claire asked, her tone holding
“I fell asleep in the study room, I’m sorry,” Riley replied, moving by Kelsey and sitting down between the two of them. “I just got here–”
“You missed the first two periods, but they’re getting ready to start the third so there’s still some game for you to watch.” Kelsey added, nodding towards the ice.
“How’s he doing?” Riley asked, looking at them both before looking up at the score. “And we’re winning three to one, so that’s great!”
“He’s had a few shots on goal, but other than that he got an assist on Johnny’s second goal,” Claire replied, as the arena lights started to dim. “So good, but I’m sure it’s not what he wants to be doing.”
Riley sat there and paid as best attention to the remainder of the game that she could, hoping that Matthew hadn’t noticed her lack of attendance earlier in the game and that if he did, by some slim chance then maybe he’d notice she was here now. Johnny scored another goal late in the third, getting himself a hat trick and giving the Flames an four to one lead, resulting in a Flames win the moment time ran out of the buzzer signaling the end of the game went off. She stayed with the group of women as they left their seats to make their way down to meet up with the boys. Kelsey stayed with her as she met up with one of the supervisors who had her backpack and grabbed it before finally making her way down beneath the stadium, making it just in time before any of the players made their way out of the locker room.
Jacob and Matthew both didn’t do any post-game media, so it wasn’t that long of a wait for them to come out of the locker room showered and dressed back in their suits. Despite the big win against the back-to-back Stanley Cup Champions, Matthew seemed a little more down than he usually was after a win and Riley couldn’t help but think maybe it was because he somehow knew she was late to the game, even after she promised that she would be there. She tried not to dwell too much on that thought, because she knew it was an accident but also because she didn’t want the situation to turn into something bigger just when things seemed to be going so well.
Oscar got stuck doing media, so Kelsey gave them the go ahead to leave without her since she would be waiting. The four of them walked together, making their way to the parking garage where eventually, they said their goodbyes to each other and got into their separate cars. The drive home was quiet, but Matthew, like every other time they rode in a car together, had his right hand rested on her thigh, which was the only thing keeping Riley from thinking that the car ride was quiet due to him being upset. It’d been a long day and they were both tired.
Once they reached Matthew’s apartment complex, the two of them made their way to his apartment, side by side but not hand in hand, still in silence. But over anything, at least the physical distance between them wasn’t great. Every once in a while, their shoulders would brush against each other– and it was weird that Riley was finding some sort of comfort in that since everything inside of her was telling her that clearly there was some tension that wasn’t due to the silence. Matthew stood in front of his apartment door, unlocking it and then walking in, Riley following in behind him and closing the door.
She was paying attention to what he was doing for the reason that if she was wrong, then she would take the jump and ask him if everything was okay. Because Matthew had a similar routine every time they came back to his apartment after a game. He’d hang his keys up on the wall, then walk past the kitchen and place his jacket onto the kitchen table before taking his shoes off and then walking into his room to change over. Only the moment that he tossed his keys onto the bar counter and continued to walk into his room, she knew obviously something was wrong.
Riley let some space settle between them before she followed behind him into his bedroom, staying by the door as he tossed his jacket into the hamper he often took to get dry cleaned and started undressing before walking into his closet.
“Is everything okay?” She asked, walking further into the room and standing in front of his closet where he had taken off his shoes and was taking off his suit pants.
“Everything’s fine,” he replied, draping his belt onto a hanger and stepping out of his pants, bending down to grab them.
“Are you sure?” Riley asked, crossing her arms and furrowing her eyebrows as he took off his shirt and socks, carrying the clothes and walking out of the closet before dropping them into the respective hampers– dry cleaning and normal laundry.
“Yep,” he said, walking back by her again and going back into his closet, tugging on one of the dresser drawers. “Why?”
“You just seem off…I guess,” she replied, leaning against the closet opening.
“Nope, I’m fine,” he replied, shutting the dresser drawer and changing out of his briefs, putting on a new pair before looking at the clothes in front of him. “Everything is perfectly fine.”
It was one thing for her own brain to try and nag her about being late to his game and make her feel bad, but it was a whole nother thing for it to be Matthew to do the same. Clearly he was upset about something and was being sarcastic now that she was asking for it. And instead of arguing about it, Riley just wanted to say her piece and move on.
“If you don’t want to tell me what’s wrong then that’s fine, but you don’t have to be so sarcastic with your answers.” She replied, turning away from his closet and walking out of his room and over to the kitchen table, placing her backpack down onto it and starting to unpack so she could get some more work done.
She plugged her laptop charger into the wall and sat down in her chair, just as she heard Matthew come walking out of his room, zipping up his pair of jeans, stopping by the kitchen table and looking at her and laughing dryly. “Of course you’re doing more homework.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” She asked, turning in her chair. Matthew rolled his eyes, but not before he shook his head as if to brush her off. “No, don’t just shake your head and ignore me. What’s that supposed to mean Matthew, hm?”
“It means exactly what it sounds like it means, Riley,” he said, motioning towards her. “These last two weeks you’ve either had your face buried in your computer, in a textbook or in a pillow passed out because you’re too tired to do anything.”
Riley felt taken aback as she sat there on the kitchen table chair, crossing her arms. “What am I supposed to do, Matthew? Ignore my responsibilities and write halfass papers and homework that I have to do in order to get my degree?”
“No, but you can take a break every once in a while,” he replied, walking back into his room and leaving the conversation. “All you care about is writing papers or studying for tests or getting a perfect grade on your homework assignments.”
“I’m sorry for caring about my grades, but I spent a lot of money to get both of my degrees so I’m not going to do a halfass job on my assignments.” Riley stood up out of her chair and walked after him, seeing him grabbing a fresh pair of socks from the dresser his tv was standing on. “Not all of us have rich parents who could easily pay for our tuition. Some of us have to work for what we want.”
Matthew shook his head again and scoffed. “You’re not getting it, Riley.”
“What am I not getting then? Please, actually give me an answer instead of some sarcastic smart ass response and tell me what you’re problem is?”
“My problem is you knew how stressed I was about this game and how much it would mean to me for you to be there and you didn’t show up until the third period.”
“I–” Riley stared at him, blinking. “How did–”
“Claire texted Jacob when you called her and said you were on your way. Said that you fell asleep in the library.” He shook his head as he brushed by her and back out of the bedroom. “You work yourself down to the bone, Riley and I get it, you want to graduate top of your class and stuff, but tonight was important and I really wanted you there.”
“It was an accident, Matthew…” she spoke, following behind him and crossing her arms, hugging them tight against her. “I was only supposed to take a quick nap–”
“You could’ve left when Kelsey did. I know you guys were studying together because Oscar said that she had left and came home so they could have dinner together.” He cut her off, putting on a pair of sneakers, tying his shoes before standing back up and looking at her. “She made it to the game on time because she probably knew it was important to him.”
Part of her couldn’t believe that they were arguing about something so small. The other part understood that he was upset on her missing most of his game…but it was an accident. He should be understanding of that, because she could’ve just gone straight home and told him she couldn't’ make it to his game. But she still tried to go and she begged with the stadium security to let her bring her bag in so she didn’t have to go back home to drop it off and come back, only to miss even more of the game.
She still tried.
“I didn’t do it on purpose, Matthew. It was an accident,” she replied, standing there with her arms crossed. “And I still showed up. I could’ve gone straight home but I showed up because I knew you wanted me to be there and it was an accident. I didn’t purposely miss your game.”
“No, but you didn’t come and eat dinner with me either. You could have, but you didn’t,” he said, looking at her. “Do you realize how much time we’ve actually spent together in the last two weeks? Time where you weren’t on your computer or asleep at the table because you fell asleep working on homework? Maybe a day or two and that’s pushing it.”
It felt like they were going in circles, whatever it was that they were arguing about. She spoke, he spoke, she spoke again– round and round and no solution in sight. It was frustrating beyond belief, but she’d never been in this sort of situation before– fighting with someone she was dating, because she’d never had a relationship before…he was her first real one– so how the hell was it supposed to be handled? Did she let him complain and that was it? Just apologize and assume it was fine? Argue back and let her know that she didn’t do it intentionally? Every option that went through her mind, didn’t have a clear solution.
Which is why she ended up just arguing back with him, which probably wasn’t the best idea.
“I’m sorry for wanting to focus on the education I’m paying for, Matthew. I get that your hockey game was important for you, but you’ve got like twenty freaking more to make up for the one I missed. You’ve got more games and another season after this, I have this semester and then I get my degree. Of course it’s going to take my attention away, because it means a lot to me–”
“Oh, it means a lot to you?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. “So what am I? Chopped liver?”
This time Riley was the one to laugh in disbelief, shaking her head as she brought her hands to her temples. “I can’t even deal with you right now. Do you even hear yourself? What do you want me to do, huh? Apologize? Because I am, I’m sorry I missed two periods of your game because I overslept in my nap after stressing about my paper and my capstone oral presentation to get a degree that means everything to me and my future. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to see you get your assist on Johnny’s goal or God forbid, shove someone into a board. But I had a bigger priority and at least I still tried to go, I even had to beg the damn security supervisors to hold my bag so they would let me in and I wouldn’t miss your entire game.” She exhaled heavily, looking back at the blue eyed blonde. “So no, you’re not chopped liver, but right now you’re being a jerk and I don’t know if I want to be around if you’re going to keep acting like one.”
He stood there in his spot looking at her for a few seconds more before walking back into his room and coming back out a few seconds later, now with a jacket on over his t-shirt. He walked over to the bar counter and grabbed his keys, his back still to her.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m going out to celebrate with some of the guys,” he said, keeping his back to her. “I wouldn’t want to bother you anymore while you do your work or make you hang around while I’m being a jerk.”
“That’s not–” she huffed, following after him as he headed towards the door. “That’s not what I–” Riley could barely get the words out before he was out the door, shutting it and locking it behind him and leaving her alone in his apartment. “Meant.”
Riley stared at his apartment door, hoping that he would come right back through it because he forgot something, because maybe then that could be another chance for them to settle their misunderstanding and not be angry at each other. But she couldn’t hear lingering footsteps on the other side of the door, nor was there any sign that someone was attempting to even unlock and open the door. She walked back over to the kitchen table, picking her phone up and unlocking it, calling Claire and bringing the phone to her ear.
“Hey Ri, what’s up?” She asked, music in the background.
“What are you doing tonight?” Riley asked, leaning against the wall, keeping her arms close to her.
“I’m going out with Jacob and the guys, we’re downtown at the bar!” She replied, slightly yelling into the phone a little bit. “Are you and Matt coming out?”
“No, well I mean, yeah,” Riley sighed, rubbing her forehead as she looked at her computer sitting there waiting for her to start working again. “He is, he just left. I…I’m tired so I’m just gonna crash here at his place.”
A few seconds passed and for a moment, Riley thought that maybe Claire hadn’t heard her. “You okay?” Big mistake number two tonight. Claire knew her well enough to be able to see through her lies even on a phone call.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Riley nodded, turning off the kitchen light and walking into Matthew’s bedroom. “Be safe tonight, have fun and I’ll talk to you later.”
“Alright, if you’re sure. Love you.”
“Love you too,” she replied, hanging up the call and then shutting the bedroom door behind her.
Today had been long and with that fight– their first ever– with Matthew, Riley found herself way too tired to sit down at the kitchen table and try to write her paper or go over her Capstone presentation. She grabbed some of the clothes that she had here before choosing one of his shirts from his year in the OHL with the London Knights as a top and made her way into the bathroom to take a shower. It was the best time to just let the stress and exhaustion wash away with the hot water and the soap. She contemplated sending Matt an ‘I’m sorry’ text, despite the fact that she had already apologized. She also contemplated calling Claire back and telling her that she had lied to her when she said she was fine, wanting to get her big sister's advice on how to deal with the situation since Claire was an expert in all things relationship.
But she did neither. Instead, after she got out of the shower, she brushed her hair and her teeth, got dressed and climbed into Matthew’s bed, turning his tv on and finding the Lifetime app she’d downloaded, clicking on Dance Moms and watching the old episodes until she found herself falling asleep.
Riley didn’t know how much time had passed or how long she’d been asleep, but she knew for a fact that she had been asleep because the cool chill from the room sweeping underneath the raised comforter and the movement of someone settling into the bed beside her had definitely woken her up. She grabbed onto the top of the comforter, tugging it back up above her shoulders as she rolled onto her left side and groaned at the disturbance.
“Riles,” Matthew whispered, placing a hand on her waist and rubbing the area softly. “Riles, are you awake?”
“No,” she mumbled, snuggling herself down into the mattress. “I’m sleeping.”
She heard him sigh as she felt him shift closer to her, the pillow she had her head resting on dipping down and then his hand moving up onto her right arm. “Can you wake up please? I want to talk…we need to talk.”
The thump of her heart against her chest when she heard those words was enough to wake her up enough for her heavy eyelids to start blinking. She reached out for her phone on the nightstand and tapped the screen to see the time. “Matthew, it’s 1:58 in the morning…this can’t wait for a few hours?”
“Actually no, it can’t,” he replied, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. “Please, Riles?”
Riley took a deep breath and exhaled, preparing herself for whatever this ‘we need to talk’ conversation was going to be and rolled over onto her otherside, coming face to face with Matthew. “You’re home early.”
“Yeah, well I wasn’t really having the best time,” he replied, keeping himself propped up onto his left elbow as he placed his hand back on her waist, keeping it there. “The guys kept ordering shots but I don’t know…I just didn’t feel like drinking.”
“You didn’t drink at all?” She asked, shocked.
Matthew sucked in his bottom lip as he shook his head. “Nope, I just kept having the bartender give me cups of water. I wasn’t in the mood to get drunk and celebrate, you know?”
Riley pouted, resting both of her hands beneath her pillow. “What? Are you going to say I ruined your celebration too?”
He chuckled softly, nodding his head. “I deserve that, I was a dick to you earlier and you didn’t deserve it. I know you still tried to make it to my game and I understand the pressure you’re under right now and it wasn’t fair of me to come for you like that about school.”
Still tired, Riley kept blinking and trying to comprehend what Matthew was saying. “Where’s this all coming from?”
Matthew looked at her, a nervous look on his face as he licked his lips and exhaled, closing his eyes for a few seconds before opening them again and looking at her. “I love you.” He must have seen the shocked look on her face even in the dim lighting from his tv screen because she could see his adam’s apple bob up and down with a nervous swallow. “I talked to Claire…well, more like she yelled at me–”
“I’m confused,” Riley said, starting to sit herself up.
“No, no, keep laying down,” he said, nudging her back down onto her side. “Claire asked me if you were really tired and I told her everything that happened and…well for one she chewed me a new one.”
“She tends to do that when she’s mad,” Riley nodded, keeping her focus on him.
“But she was right to do it, Riles, because she made me realize how what I said was unfair. I would have realized that by tomorrow or something…but she made me realize it sooner and then we got to talking about how this has been your dream since you were in middle school and you’ve been working your ass off ever since. And then she started doing that whole like therapist thing she does where she asks how you really feel–”
Riley laughed, tilting her head to the side. “She does that too. Pisses Brendan off more than anything.”
Matthew laughed softly. “Yeah, but uh…it works because she’s really good at it and she helped me realize that it wasn’t you being caught up in school or missing the first two periods of my game tonight that upset me, you know? It was me being so worked up about my performance and the game and then just…”
“Matt?” She asked, reaching out and resting her hand on his left bicep, squeezing it lightly and gaining his attention. “Breathe.”
He nodded, and took a deep breath and sighed. “I’m not mad about you almost missing my game, Riles. I’m a little upset you’re pushing yourself so hard on this school thing, but I understand that now, you know? But besides that, I’ve just…kind of been beating myself up inside about how I feel about you because…well…” He gulped again, looking at her. “I love you, Riles. I really do and it freaks me out because it’s only been a month and I didn’t want to scare you away or anything but I do. I love you and I’m tired of beating myself up about it and I told Claire that and she told me I needed to stop being an idiot and to come home and tell you, not her…so here I am. Stone cold sober and you don’t have to say it back, I’m not saying it to pressure you or anything but…well…yeah.”
Riley didn’t know how to reply. She’d only met Matthew officially for the first time in January. Sure, they’d been at events together, but that moment in the bar was the first time the two ever exchanged words. Then weeks after that night, they were on a set up blind date. Not too long after that, they were dating and now here he was, lying next to her in his bed and telling her that he loved her. Never in her life had she had someone who wasn’t a friend or family, tell her that they loved her. Sure, she’d had guys tell her that they liked her, but they never got to this point– this was uncharted territory.
Was familial love and relationship love the same? She knew she loved her parents and her siblings and her best friends, she recognized that feeling of love. But would it be any different for Matthew? She knew that she cared so much about him, just the same as she did her family and friends. But obviously, there was a difference and there were different ways that she cared for him than she did them. It was almost instinct for her to come over to his apartment instead of her own at the end of her day. She knew how he took his coffee and how he ate the same thing before every game. She knew where he liked to go on his days off if he wasn’t staying in bed. Whenever she felt anxious, just his touch alone could bring her at ease. Even just looking at him made her day so much bright. So does she love Matthew? Is that what all of these things that seemed to happen so fast in the last few months meant? Is that why she was absolutely terrified the first time that those three words slipped between his lips?
Yet when she looked at Matthew, that terrified feeling faded into the back, only leaving her thumping heartbeat in her chest in its wake and the temptation of saying those three words stuck on her lips. Her lips that were slowly turning up into a smile as she felt her cheeks heat up and her hand moved from his bicep up to his cheek, brushing her thumb against his beard.
“I love you too.”
DAY 108 – APRIL 18TH, 2022 [ SPONTANEOUS VACATION ]
“I can’t believe that you’ve been here for two years and you’ve never been to Banff,” Matthew laughed, shaking his head as they moved up in the line, each with a coffee from the starbucks in hand.
“I’ve always been busy,” Riley shrugged, taking a small sip of the hot coffee. “Besides, Claire was adjusting to her job and didn’t have a lot of vacation time between settling in on the weekends. Then she met Jacob and I was not third wheeling with those two.”
“Still,” he said, shaking his head. “Banff was one of the first things I did when I moved here. My mom and I came here and it’s one of my favorite places to go.”
“Oh?” Riley asked, raising her eyebrow. “Is this where you take all of your dates too?”
Matthew rolled his eyes as he bumped into her. “No, I don’t take all of my dates here, you dork. But, it’s so peaceful, you know? Just all of the nature…when you live in the city, especially back home in St. Louis, you just kind of forget about how beautiful it can be.”
“Touching,” she sighed, resting her hand over her heart. “That was so beautiful, I’m going to quote you on that for my instagram caption.”
He threw an arm over her shoulder and pulled her into his side, keeping her trapped. “You’re such a brat sometimes, you’re lucky I love you.”
“Mhhm,” she agreed, looking up at him as she stood on her tippy toes and kissed his lips softly. “So lucky.”
In an extremely rare occurrence, the Flames had the day off. A previously scheduled game was now going to be rescheduled due to an amount of covid cases on their opponents team, leaving them with no enough players to play. Meaning that Matthew and the Flames didn’t have to travel until tomorrow morning, when they’d fly to Nashville. Matthew came home from what was supposed to be him leaving for Chicago and woke her up, telling her they’d just had a quick practice and that he was free for the rest of the day and that she should get dressed because he wanted to take her somewhere fun.
Somewhere fun turned into grabbing breakfast from Tim Hortons and then Matthew driving the hour and a half from Calgary to Banff, the two of them listening to music and picking the other’s karaoke song, every so often doing a duet. It was a nice break from homework and stress, her one day off of classes where she was planning on sleeping the entire day away– she was actually being swept off to some of the prettiest mountains in Alberta, their first trip together as a couple.
Having been here plenty of times before, Riley let Matthew take the reins on what they would do. They grabbed another coffee at the Starbucks inside the building that was at the base of the mountain before getting onto the Gondola. She was mesmerized by the sights of the snow covered ground and trees as they rode up the mountain. Never before had she seen such an amazing, jaw dropping sight and begrudgingly, she told Matthew that he was right. It was a beautiful view and one that she had been so easily to forget had existed because of how she spent a majority of her time in the city in a classroom and with her face in a computer.
They walked hand in hand down the boardwalk, stopping every so often to take pictures or to just take in the sights. Matthew had gotten stopped every so often by other people who were enjoying the view, talking to him about the season and the team and asking for a picture. Riley wasn’t bothered by it one bit and she offered to take the picture for them if they wanted. It was nice seeing Matthew in his element. He was such a people person and so outgoing and talkative, but she also knew very well that shy and quiet side of him when it was just the two of them in the apartment and lounging on the couch watching netflix.
By the time they made it to Sanson’s peak, Riley could feel her face start to go numb from the cold and she was fully curled up into Matthew’s side as they looked out at the view. Snow was actively falling and yet she couldn’t take her focus off of the stretch of peaceful and beautiful nature in front of them. It was magical, like she was standing in the middle of one of those Hallmark Christmas movies her mom recorded for all of them to watch when they were together on Christmas break.
“It’s beautiful, Matthew,” she said, looking up at him as her head was resting against his chest. “Thank you for bringing us here.”
“Of course,” he said, kissing the top of her Flames beanie of his that she’d taken to wear. “Beautiful views for a beautiful girl.”
Riley laughed, shaking her head as she nudged him. “You’re so cheesy.”
“Jacob said the same thing when he saw that picture of us from the Super Bowl party taped up in my locker,” he smiled, shrugging. “And then I called him out for the same thing because I know he’s got a picture of him and Claire in there somewhere.”
“You have a picture of us in your locker?” She asked, blinking slowly. “Really?”
Matthew nodded. “I’ve got pictures of my parents and my grandparents and siblings too…all of the people that I love and who mean the world to me.”
“You’re such a cheeseball,” she laughed, wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her face against his chest, reveling in the feeling of his arm around her as she looked out at the winter scene.
She always teased her mom and Claire for loving those Hallmark Christmas movies so much. There was something so ridiculous about the same storyline in different movies. Boy meets girl, girl ignores boy, some weird coincidence brings them together and they find that they’ve got a lot more in common than they thought and then the feelings start and everything seems so full of happiness and love. Then, the big climax of the movie, something goes wrong, but in the end it all works out. Every movie was so different, but also so similar. It was magical, romantic and now that she had Matthew…part of her understood why they loved those movies so much or why Claire seemed to always put herself all into her relationships.
Because here, right now with Matthew holding onto her as she stared out at the mountains and the trees with the snow falling around them, Riley had never felt more at peace than she did in this very moment.
DAY 150 – MAY 30TH, 2022 [ A MOST IMPORTANT DAY ]
She’d been here before– sitting in a stuffy auditorium surrounded by hundreds of students, wearing a not so comfortable robe and shifting every so often in her chair to make sure that her butt didn’t fall asleep while she listened to the speakers talk. She had her bachelor’s degree, so she knew how a graduation ceremony would go and how long it could take, but right now everything felt so different.
Her gown wasn’t so different than the one she wore when she got her bachelor’s degree, aside from the velvet that lined the master hood. Her cap was the exact same, though this time instead of it being decorated with a nod towards her next journey to the University of Calgary like her cap had been when she received her master’s, this one was decorated with light blue scrapbook paper that covered the black of the cap, sticky flowers on the two side corners and in the middle, in white painted letters (thanks to Claire), was a quote from One Tree Hill, many she had scoured over what to pick, but one that Matthew was found.
“So for now I say goodbye to this chapter of my life and I look forward to what comes next.”
A cap that was decorated with Kelsey and Claire sitting at the kitchen table in Matthew’s apartment, Jacob, Oscar and Matthew sitting in the living room and drinking beer, relaxing and sulking slightly at the way their season had ended only four days earlier. And like she had been feeling the weeks leading up to graduation, Riley sat there feeling a sort of mourning for the community she’d be leaving behind once she went back home to St. Louis once she graduated– scared of leaving behind her friends and the unknown of her future.
It was a feeling she’d tried to hide that she was experiencing it, but one that Matthew had called her out on many times and she’d expressed to him her doubts and fears and overall worries…which is why he suggested that quote, and how easily it fit in along with all of the times he’d talked her off the edge of fear.
And while that feeling had been hanging over her the moment she woke up that morning in her own apartment, having had a sleepover with Kelsey so the two could get ready together before heading off to campus to prepare for the ceremony, once she heard them announce her name, hometown and degree and crossed the stage, the cheers of her friends and family and classmates echoing in her ears….she felt hopeful. All she could think about was meeting up with her family afterwards, seeing the smiles on their faces. She looked forward to playfully teasing her parents about wanting to take so many pictures. Sure, she’d experienced this all too familiar feeling before…only this time, there was a big difference.
She’d be greeting Matthew as well.
When the ceremony came to an end and the cheers and applause of her peers, their friends and families and faculty alike bounced off of the auditorium walls, Riley was one of the first students to make a beeline for where they were instructed to pick up their actual paper diplomas from tables set off to the side. She was fourth in line at her respective last name table, assuming the other three students were sat right on the aisle of their rows and her phone was going off, presumably her family group chat texting her on where they would meet her once she made her way outside.
With diploma in hand (well, in the leather diploma folder), Riley maneuvered her way through the crowds of students and guests who were still filed into the auditorium, eager to get outside to meet up with everyone. Her eyes were squinting the moment she stepped outside into the summer day, the cap that was still on her head providing no shade for her eyes, leaving her to shield them from the hot sun using her free hand as she tried to see if she could spot anyone familiar.
“Riles!” She heard Matthew call out, yet she didn’t see him as she looked around. “Riles, over here!” His voice was a little louder now, allowing her to figure out what direction it was at least coming from. She looked to her right to see Matthew waving his left hand in the air and walking over to her with a smile on his face. Immediately she noticed that he was wearing her favorite shirt of his– the lavender dress shirt– coupled with gray slacks and the YSL belt she jokingly teased him for wearing all of the time.
Riley walked in his direction, quickening her pace the closer she got before she reached him and jumped in his arms, wrapping her own around his neck and pressing her face into the side of his neck as he wrapped his left arm around her, supporting her. “Did they ditch you? I thought you were supposed to sit with Claire, Jacob and my parents?”
Matthew placed her back down onto the ground, keeping his left hand at the small of her back as he leaned down and kissed her before standing back up. “Well, when Oscar and I finally got a parking spot, Claire said some lady threw a huge fit about them saving two seats, so we ended up sitting on a whole different side of the auditorium with Kelsey’s family.”
“I’m surprised Claire didn’t throw her down the steps.”
“She sounded like she was a few seconds away from doing that when we were on the phone, but I told her it was fine and that I’d meet up with them,” he held out the bouquet of white daisies and deep pink, along with red roses and smiled. “These are for you. I know you don’t really like roses, but my mom lectured me about how I couldn’t not get my girlfriend roses on such a big day.”
“They’re beautiful, Matt,” Riley took a small whiff of the fresh flowers and looked back at him with a smile. “Thank you, and I’ll be sure to tell your mom thank you as well.”
“Please, because I’m 90 percent sure my dad stopped her from lecturing me about how roses aren’t just roses and all of the colors have different meanings…it was a lot,” he took a deep breath as he rested his hands on his hips and sighed, shaking his head. “But enough about that, let’s go find everyone!”
Riley held his hand as the two of them made their way over to the meeting spot that her family had agreed on beforehand– about halfway between the parking lot and the auditorium– and she couldn’t stop thinking about how this was going to be the moment where Matthew would meet her parents for the first time. A bad case of food poisoning mixed in with traveling had kept them from meeting Matthew when they flew in the day before what would be the last game of the Flames season. Then with end of season stuff, exit media and the chaos of upcoming graduation– there was just never a free time for them to meet.
Until now, and now, she was absolutely petrified of them meeting. She wasn’t all that sure why, because she’d seen her parents meet Jacob and both of Claire’s high school boyfriends, not to mention Brendan’s girlfriend. She knew her mom would be just as welcoming and heartfelt as Chantal was when Riley had met her and she knew that her dad would immediately play the tough guy, only to melt seconds later. She knew it, she’s seen it– and yet she was more nervous about Matthew meeting her parents than she had been about potentially tripping on stage when she walked across it.
She snuck a look at Matthew from the corner of her eye who was talking about how he and Oscar had spent all morning making sure the catering was confirmed to be delivered to Kelsey’s parents house since they were hosting the party and how he had no idea how his mom ever planned an entire party or why she enjoyed planning them so much because he was stressed only because of food that he wasn’t even in charge of cooking. She felt her nerves waver away as she zoned in on how he was swinging their conjoined hands at a comfortable pace and had his other hand snug in his pant pocket, walking with total confidence and grace that just seemed to be so infectious that it was somehow washing over her.
“Riley Anne Thompson you little genius!” Claire yelled, easily gaining their attention. She was standing straight ahead of them just a few feet away and waving her hands in the air. “Get your butts over here!”
Matthew chuckled and Riley looked up at him with a pout. “Stop it right now.”
“I just think it’s funny, you know? Your initials spell rat and everyone thinks I am one,” he squeezed her hand supportively. “Almost makes it seem like it was meant to be, hm?”
Once they got close enough, Matthew let go of Riley’s hand and nodded at her to hand him her diploma and flowers so she could hug her family. She wasted no time greeting each of her parents with a hug before moving onto her brother and then both Claire and Jacob. When the congratulations and the hugs were done, she turned around with a nervous smile and walked the small distance where Matthew had been standing and stood beside him with a proud smile.
“Mom, Dad, this is Matthew, my boyfriend” she smiled, looking away from Matthew and over to her parents. “Matthew, my mom and dad.”
“Otherwise known as Elizabeth and Michael,” her mom smiled, breaking the distance and greeting Matthew with a hug. “And we’ve heard a ton about you from Claire and Riley both. It’s very nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to meet you too, ma’am,” Matthew replied, hugging her before turning his attention to Riley’s dad as her mom pulled away from the hug, extending his hand out towards her dad. “And you too as well, sir.”
Riley swallowed the knot in her throat as she looked at her Dad, who, as predicted, was pulling his tough guy act with the squinty eyes and stone faced demeanor. She told Matthew not to be so polite and nervous, because she knew her Dad would see it coming from a mile away– and there they were…the slight awkward tension. She watched as her dad looked at Matthew’s hand and then back up at him before cracking a smile and reaching out to shake his hand.
“It’s nice to meet you as well, Matthew,” her dad said, adding another pure father moment by patting Matthew’s shoulder as well. “I’m glad to see that someone was finally able to break down those walls of Riley’s. I was starting to think that thing was going to surpass the great wall of China–”
“Michael!”
“Well, you survived the meeting,” Claire whispered, resting her chin on Riley’s shoulder and trying not to stifle a laugh. “Now all you’ve got to do is survive the party.”
“It’ll be fine,” Riley replied, shrugging as she looked back at Matthew who was now making small talk with their dad and brother. “I think they love him already.”
And things were fine, totally and beyond fine. Once they caught up with Kelsey, Oscar and her family, both groups made their way back to Kelsey’s parents home only a short distance away and from the moment they pulled up to the house and as the time ticked on, the party was in full swing. Riley got a front row seat to seeing her dad and Matthew talk about who knew what, but anytime she snuck a glimpse she felt her heart swell and she couldn’t help but smile and wonder if this feeling was what he meant by when he told her how much he loved seeing her get along with his mom and sister the first time they met and she sat with them at one of his games.
She sat back in enjoyment as she watched Matthew entertain some of Kelsey’s nieces and nephews with various yard games– limbo being the one where he dramatically fell to the ground to make all of the kids giggle because “you’re so bad at this! Look, it’s not that hard!” Or when he and Oscar gave a joint “proud boyfriend” speech after the proud parents had. How he and Jacob both accepted Bredan’s challenge of eating their wings the fastest, then proceeding to win and down her water when the heat got too much. Then getting her a refill, of course.
The drinks were flowing and as the sun started to set and everyone continued to have a good time, Riley was talking to Kelsey about their next steps. Kelsey had managed to get a job with a junior hockey team as a physical trainer in Calgary, following that she passed her certification and that she was also considering getting her PhD as well, though she wasn’t all too certain about that yet. She was excited for her friend to hear about all of the set plans that she had now that they had graduated, but Riley would be lying if she said she didn’t feel totally unprepared. Sure, she looked into jobs and applied. Some were here in Calgary, others were back home in St. Louis, but she’d yet to hear back from any of them. But she wouldn’t let that get in the way of how proud and happy she was for Kelsey. Especially since earlier before graduation when she saw her mentor, they had a conversation and her mentor said she would help look around for jobs she might be interested in.
Riley took a small sip from her beer bottle and was about to reply to Kelsey’s question about if she and Matthew had any summer plans when she saw the man of the hour himself come walking over from the back porch, smiling at her and making a ‘come here’ motion with his right hand as he held his beer in his left.
“It seems that I’ve been summoned by the needy boyfriend, so I’ll be right back,” she smiled, putting her beer down into the cup holder of her lawn chair and standing up, meeting him halfway as they stood by the bonfire. “Yes?”
Matthew held out his hand and nodded at it. “Grab my hand,” he brought his bottle up to his lips as he took another sip, watching and waiting for her to grab his hand.
“Why? What’s the trick?” She asked, hesitantly reaching her hand out.
He huffed, letting his smile fall as he looked at her. “Just grab it.” Riley placed her hand on his, eyeing him suspiciously as he just smiled and held her hand before pulling her closer and wrapping his left arm around her waist, looking down at her. “Gotcha, now you’ve gotta dance with me.”
“Matthew,” Riley whined, leaning her head back as she pouted. “You know I don’t like slow dancing.”
“Yeah, but I also know that you like slow dancing when it’s with me,” he smiled, nodding at her. “Now would it kill you to act like you love me and put your other hand on me?”
Riley smiled, shrugging. “It might.”
“You’re a brat.”
“Where do you think I learned it from?” Riley replied, rolling her eyes as she rested her right hand on his arm.
“Claire,” he replied, the two of them laughing soon after before letting it fade out as they both just swayed back and forth. “Oh look, I started a trend!”
Riley looked around them and saw that Oscar had grabbed Kelsey to dance, the same with Jacob and Claire and the parents. She shook her head, looking back at him. “Maybe everyone just got tired of standing around.”
“Orrrrr,” he smiled, stepping back and twirling her unsuspectingly. “They think we’re a cute couple and it’s super romantic and they too want to be cute and romantic.”
Riley just laughed as he brought her back into him, fanning his hand out against her back. “Okay, whatever you say.”
The two of them swayed there, Riley feeling herself start to relax against Matthew’s chest and starting to focus on the sound of his heartbeat echoing inside of his chest. “So are you going to tell me what had you so upset?” Matthew spoke quietly just so they could hear.
“Hm?” She asked, keeping her eyes closed as she zoned back in. “I wasn’t upset.”
“You looked upset while talking to Kelsey. That’s why I came off of the porch and swept you off your feet with my incredible dance moves.” He leaned himself back to look at her and tilted his head to the side slightly. “So?”
Riley opened her eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled, shrugging her shoulders. “We were talking about what we were going to do now that we were done with school and she was telling me about all the stuff she’s got set in stone and planned and I don’t know…I just felt,” she paused, shaking her head. “Nevermind, it’s dumb.”
“No it’s not,” he replied, looking at her. “Your feelings aren’t dumb, Riles.”
“It’ll just make me sound like I’m jealous that she’s got all these plans set in stone, and maybe part of me is because I’ve applied to five jobs and haven’t heard a single whisper of news. But I’m not jealous, not really…I’m proud of her and happy for her because she’s my friend.”
“But you wish you had some sort of plan set in stone?”
“Exactly,” she mumbled, pouting slightly as she looked over to where Kelsey and Oscar were at. “But more than anything I’m happy for her, you know?”
“You’ll hear back soon, Riles. I just know it,” Matthew said, pulling her closer to him again. “And they’ll be lucky to have you.”
Riley rolled her eyes again in a playful manner as she tried to fight back her smile. “You have to say that, you’re–”
Matthew leaned in quickly, pressing his mouth against hers and cutting her words off with a kiss, pulling back just barely before kissing her two more times, smiling more into each one before he pulled back completely, a smile on his face as he rested his forehead against hers and looked into her eyes. “Anyone would be lucky to have you work for them, Riles. And I’m not just saying that because I’m your boyfriend. I mean it. You’re a catch, got it?”
Riley smiled, nodding her head. “Go it.”
“Good,” he replied, kissing her forehead before Riley moved her head down to his chest again and he held her close once more. “It’ll all work out, Riles. Everything you want in your life…it’ll all work out. I just know it.”
She smiled as she snuggled her head further against him, taking in the smell of his cologne and closing her eyes. She could picture it so easily– her working in her dream field, coming home from a day at work to their shared apartment, more vacations in Banff, matching playoff jackets with her sister and Kelsey…a life with Matthew at home in St. Louis and in their seasonal home in Calgary. She had been filled with so much self doubt just minutes earlier, but with Matthew’s assurance, she believed it could come true.
DAY 184 – JULY 4TH [ CURRENT DAY ]
“Ri?” Claire said, her voice sounding distant. “Riley!”
“Huh, what?” Riley asked, zoning back out of her thoughts as she looked at her sister who had finally stopped shaking her shoulder.
“I said we’re here.”
Riley looked out of her back passenger window to see the all too familiar apartment building. The knot that was in her stomach was now extending up to her throat as she stared at the building that Jacob was pulled up in front of, unable to get her brain to tell her hand to reach for her door handle to open the door and let herself out.
“You don’t have to do this right now, Ri,” Claire spoke softly, resting a hand on top of hers and giving it a light squeeze. “Jacob can always do it.”
“Yeah Riley,” Jacob spoke from the driver's seat, nodding his head as he turned slightly to look at her. “I can just drop it off for you when we go back to the apartment after dinner. I’ll drop you guys off and then come back here.”
The offer was enticing and for a moment, Riley considered taking it. But only for a moment, because it wasn’t just dropping it off that she needed to do, there was something else she needed to go if she was going to survive the rest of her summer and the months that followed.
She cleared her throat, shaking her head and exhaled. “No, that’s okay I–” she turned away from the window and looked at Claire, Jacob and Brendan. “I can do it.”
Brendan looked at Claire before looking back at Riley. “Are you—“
“Yes, Brendann…I’m sure.” She pulled on her door handle and opened the door, making sure she had her purse before she unbuckled her seatbelt and got out of the car and stepping out into the sidewalk. “I’ll be right back and please…just stay here?”
They nodded and she shut the door behind her, turning back around and staring up at the apartment building she’d been to so many times. It was hard to believe that this would be the last time that she walked through those double doors and greet the receptionist behind the counter with a smile. If she remembered correctly, Shannon would be working today. She’d come to know all of the people who worked behind the desks' names, even from the few months she’d been around. They almost became like good friends to her, so it was weird that this would also possibly be the last time she ever saw any of them again.
Nervously, she pulled on the door handle and walked into the lobby of the apartment building, seeing that no one was standing behind the desk which she was extremely grateful for since that meant no awkward conversation was needed. She quickly walked across the lobby and towards the elevators, pressing the up arrow and sighing in relief when the doors opened immediately. She walked into the elevator, shutting the door behind her and holding the key fob against the scanner that allowed the elevator to move up to the residential floors before pressing number ten. The elevator moved slowly and she crossed her arms, hugging them to her chest as she leaned against the corner thinking about the last time she’d been in this building.
Two days ago in fact, and part of her didn’t want to come back here so soon but she knew that she was leaving Calgary tomorrow morning and while she could do what she was doing simply by mail…she couldn’t bring herself to do it. It seemed so impersonal, which things had never been.
Matthew’s family had come up to Calgary to take in some of the summer sights since the season was over. Riley loved his family and how down to earth they all were. She especially loved seeing the natural chirping and playful teasing between Matthew, his brother and their dad. His brother, Brady, had brought along his girlfriend and it was a short vacation in Calgary before everyone was headed off to Greece for their annual family vacation. A vacation that Riley would be joining, and one she was hesitant to when Matthew had originally invited her along because it was a family vacation and they’d only started dating. But he had said that he was going to ask her anyway after checking with his parents, but his parents beat him to the punch when his mom had asked publicly in the family group chat if he was going to bring her along.
Riley did insist on paying for her part in the trip, but both of his parents refused to accept her part, and she bargained to at least pay for her plane ticket— which she did. They were all out to dinner when Riley had stepped out because she’d gotten a missed call from her mentor. So she excused herself from the table and went outside of the restaurant to listen to the voicemail her mentor had left behind and when she was done listening to it— she stood there in disbelief.
The job her mentor had her apply for, one that Riley thought there was no chance in the world that she could get…well, she got it. Her mentor had called her to tell her that their contact with the hospital said that she had been chosen as one of the two other applicants to be hired to fill the pediatric occupational therapist positions they had available and thought she would pass the word on before they had sent her the official email, which she would get the next morning.
It was hard to explain how excited she was about the news. It’d been a little over a month since she’d graduated College and had yet to hear back from any of the jobs she applied to and yet there she was— getting her first piece of good news from the job she never thought she’d get hired on for. And then the nerves set in— Boston. She’d obviously have to move away from St. Louis and away from Calgary. And as she made her way back to dinner, she determined that she was too nervous to share the good news with everyone at the table. Because while announcing that she got a job was good news, announcing that she would be moving states away from her boyfriend didn’t seem like it would go over as well.
So…she saved the conversation for that night as her and Matthew were getting ready to go to bed. She had settled for the night before he did, he was still walking around his room and getting stuff ready for both his move back down to St. Louis for the summer, but also making sure he had whatever stuff he’d be packing for the trip to Greece later on. By the time he got into bed, he closed his eyes and just laid there, exhaling before opening his eyes and looking at her.
“What?” He asked, head and upper back leaning against his headboard.
“Hm?” She replied, zoning back in on him. “I didn’t say anything.”
“No, but you’re staring at me.” He laughed, resting his hands on his stomach and interlocking his fingers. “I know I’m hot, but try not to get your drool all over my pillow, hm?”
Riley rolled her eyes and laughed. “I’ll try not to.”
He smiled softly, lolling his head to the side and looking at her. “But really Riles, what’s up? You’ve seemed…off all night, since we got to and left dinner, actually.”
She rested her own hands on top of the comforter, twiddling with her thumbs as she thought about what she was going to say. Her immediate thought was to just tell him that she was tired, because tonight had been so, so good and fun and relaxing, she didn’t want her announcement to make it all crash down. But she knew that wouldn’t be fair to him for her to tell him any other time than now, because after all…she didn’t know when it was that she’d need to move to Boston.
“Remember the group of jobs that my mentor had me apply for? And I told you there was one that was way out of my league and I didn’t think I’d get it, but she had me apply anyway?” Riley spoke, looking at her hands.
“Yeah, did you hear back from any of them?” He sounded so nonchalant and the fact that he wouldn’t see this coming was enough for the familiar feeling of prickling tears to start to form in her eyes.
“I did, right before dinner. She called and uh, well…I got the job that I didn’t think I’d get,” she said, swallowing the knot in her throat as she looked at him. “The one in Boston…I–I got it.”
He sat himself up, a big smile on his face. “What? Riles, that's awesome!” He reached over and draped his arm over her shoulders, tugging her into him as he hugged her, pulling back and looking at her again. “I’m so proud of you, this is great! Why didn’t you say anything at dinner? That’s something to celebrate!”
Riley just stared at him, not wanting to say the words. The silence spoke what she couldn’t say and like a movie, she watched the realization dawn on him and if hearing him be so excited for her and proud of her wasn’t enough to make the burning feeling of tears in her eyes stronger, it was seeing his proud, beaming smile start to fade. Back when she had applied for jobs, most of which were either in St. Louis or Calgary, they had a conversation about what they were going to do with their relationship. Matthew had done long distance before and in his eyes, it was just something that never worked out, even if both parties tried their best to make it work.
St. Louis was one thing, but Boston was another. He lived in St. Louis three to four months out of the year. If she stayed there, things could have been easier, just like they would have been easier if she got a job in Calgary. But Boston? Sure, he had family there, but they only visited once or twice a year, many times in the summer. The summer was his time to relax at home with his friends and family, catch up on what he missed while he was in Calgary for the previous eight to nine months. It wasn’t realistic to ask of him to sacrifice any time at home, to spend his summer with her in Boston so they could have time together too.
The thought of the end had been in her mind the moment what Boston really meant had sunken in as she had walked back to their dinner table earlier.
This, her and Matthew, the last five to six months– it was done.
“Say something,” she whispered, feeling her bottom lip tremble as the tears blurred her vision. “Please?”
“Do you know when you have to be there?” He asked, clearing his throat as he tried to wipe away any sign of disappointment that she’d already seen.
Riley shook her head, sitting herself up fully and sitting criss cross applesauce, keeping her hands rested in her lap. “No, I’ll probably find out tomorrow because that’s when I’m supposed to get the official email.”
“Well, we can hold off for a few months until you have to move, right?” He nodded, clearing his throat again before taking a deep breath and exhaling, placing his left hand on top of her hands. “Unless that’s something you don’t want to do? What do you want to do, Riles?”
Oh, he must’ve seen her reaction to that suggestion. It wasn’t a bad one, but it wasn’t an eager nod…it was more of a frown, like she knew it wasn’t going to work. “I don’t know,” she spoke softly, holding onto his hand as she looked at him. “Any chance your whole view on long distance relationships changed?”
The shake of his head was subtle, but enough to send her heart plummeting in her chest. There was no holding back the tears that had been filling her eyes from falling down her face as the reality sank in. How was this the way everything was going to end? Why were these cards handled? What kind of being running the universe would put them on the other’s path and then split them to go down separate ways just when everything was going great? Neither of them wanted to end their relationship, but there was no way that would work out for them if they chose to stay in it? The hopelessness of it all felt like it was pulling her down and she was clawing at the surface for small gasps of air so she could make it through this unscathed.
“I–” he paused, clearing his throat as he kept his focus on their hands, an intense focus that Riley recognized as his attempt not to cry. He kept that same focus the first time they watched Dear John together, because she’d never seen it.
She bawled like a baby, he came close to, but was trying very, very hard not to.
“I don’t want you to not be excited about this,” he spoke slowly and clearly, trying to keep his voice clear from emotion. “Because this is big Riles, this is what you’ve been working for. And I know that right now, this…this sucks, but this is what you want to do, you know? This job…this is it.”
Riley sniffled as she reached up with her left hand and wiped away the tears from her cheeks. “I don’t want to– this,” she sniffled again, shaking her head. “I don’t want this to e-end, but Matt–”
“I know,” he said, breaking his concentration on her hands and looking at her, tears in his eyes. “But I would be doing you a huge disservice if I let this continue on, because Riles…I don’t want it to end either, but I’d rather it end where we both still love each other than rather we try to stick it out and we end up hating each other because the distance doesn’t work.”
Tears continued to roll down her face as her mouth trembled. Matthew reached up with his left hand and wiped her cheeks before keeping his hand against her cheek. “I can’t even imagine a life where I don’t think you’re the greatest person in the world.”
She leaned herself over into his arms, curling up against his chest and letting him wrap his arms around her as he held her while she cried. The sobs were quiet, as she didn’t want to wake up Taryn, who was sleeping on the couch just outside of his bedroom door, but they were heavy sobs escaping from the depths of her chest she hadn’t even known existed. Sobs that were shaking her body as they exited her mouth and vibrated against his chest where she had her face pressed into his shirt. Matthew just held her, resting his cheek on top of her head and rubbing her back, letting her cry as he tried not to let her know he was crying too. But she could hear the difference in his breathing and feel the deep vibrations in his chest from him trying his best to hold in his own, small sobs.
Once they both calmed down, she pulled herself out of his arms and wiped her eyes with her hands, sniffling and looking at him. Only the moment he made eye contact with her, the waterworks were working again. “It’s just a right person wrong time, thing Riles. We’ll figure it out,” he said, reaching out and tucking hair behind her ear. “These things always work out, you’ve read enough of those books of yours to know this.”
“I love you,” she sniffled, wiping at her eyes as the tears kept falling.
Matthew smiled softly, leaning in and holding his right hand at the back of her head as he kissed her forehead. “I love you too, Riles.” He rested his forehead against hers before kissing it again and then pulling back with teary eyes and his dimpled smile. “Does this mean Taryn and I are about to fifth and sixth wheel our parents and Brady and Emma’s Greece vacation?”
Riley laughed, sniffling again as she nodded. “Probably. I don’t think…I mean, Greece it wouldn’t–”
“Relax, Riles…I understand,” he nodded, his smile falling into a smaller one. “But hey, just because we’re not dating anymore doesn’t mean we can’t still try to be friends, right?”
God, hearing the word friends was so heart crushing, even if she’d known this possibility was in the running. “Does that even work?” She asked, wiping her nose. “In the movies it alway goes wrong–”
“Well, we wouldn’t try to be friends right away, because that definitely wouldn’t work,” he said, shaking his head. “But…maybe we can try to take a break for a bit from talking to each other? A month or two? Then we can try to talk on a friendly, non-romantic, I want to rip off your clothes and jump your bones, basis?”
This time Riley laughed a genuine laugh. The stomach cramping, butterflies laugh only Matthew could make her do. “You’re a dork,” she smiled, nudging him as she settled down and took a deep breath, exhaling. “But yeah…I guess we can try that. There’s no harm right? And it should be easy. We became friends before dating–”
“Well, technically I tried to make friends with you at the bar and you shut me down.”
“You were flirting with me from the start, don’t even try it,” she smiled, pointing at him before letting her hand rest back into her laugh with a sniffle. “But really, Matthew…I want to try it. Because this,” she motioned between them. “This friendship and relationship felt really special, and I don’t want to lose that.”
“It’s a deal then,” Matthew smiled, extending out his hand for her to shake. “A month with no contact whatsoever, and then we’ll come back and try to be friends, right?”
Riley looked at his hand, realizing that if she shook it, it would seal the deal on her relationship with Matthew ending. But she meant what she said, this was special and she didn’t want to lose it. So she grabbed his hand and shook it, nodding her head. “It’s a deal.”
“Great,” he smiled softly, still shaking her head.
“Great,” she replied, feeling him squeeze her hand before he let it go. She took a deep breath and exhaled, feeling the dried tears on her face and the congestion in her nose from sniffling. “I need a shower, I feel all…gross.”
Matthew tossed his blankets to the side, nodding his head. “I’ll set you out a towel and start it for you. You can toss your stuff in the hamper and–”
“Can you wash my hair for me?” She asked, getting out of bed and following him into the bathroom. “Just one last time, please? We don’t have to do anything, but–”
“Of course, Riles,” he nodded, smiling as he opened the shower door and reached in, turning the water on. “You know I’d do anything for you.”
The ding of the elevator brought Riley out of her thoughts and she looked up to see the red 10 signaled on the screen, meaning she’d finally reached the floor where Matthew’s apartment was. She stepped off of the elevator and dug into her purse to find her copy of his apartment key, grasping the red rubber spiral keychain that the key was on in her hand hard enough to where she could feel it leaving an imprint in her palm. She felt herself start to slow down as she reached his apartment, her feet feeling heavy and her heartbeat slowing in pace until she found herself face to face with his door.
She knew he wasn’t home, Jacob himself said that Matthew was out with his parents doing some sightseeing until later tonight. They’d be flying out the day after tomorrow, when Riley would already be back home in St. Louis. She was thankful that they weren’t all flying out the same day. It was awkward enough yesterday morning after she’d left before breakfast and Matthew was left to tell Taryn and then his parents, Brady and Emma alone about why she had gone and how their relationship was no more and she’d no longer be in attendance on their family vacation. She really didn’t need to have a run in on the same flight either.
Riley pulled the key out of her purse, unlocking the door and opening it. She paused in place, listening in for any sound of life within the apartment, just in case the plans had changed, but she was greeted with silence. In relief, Riley walked into the apartment and shut the door behind her, turning back to face the open apartment and standing in place. Matthew had given her some time yesterday afternoon to come by with Claire and grab the stuff she had here, so she knew nothing of hers was here– but it still felt like home.
There wasn’t a single space in this apartment that she could look at and now have some sort of memory or picture a moment that she and Matthew had shared. She slowly walked further into the apartment, bypassing the bar counter and the kitchen table where she had opted to leave what she came to leave, there. But instead, she made her way to his bedroom, not wanting it to be so public whenever it was that he came across it. At least here, he would have some privacy.
She walked over to his bed and placed her copy of his apartment key down onto the blue comforter, reaching back into her purse and pulling out an envelope with his name on it. Inside of it was a letter that she’d written to him. It talked a lot about how she was thankful that he’d come into her life and that she was sorry for ignoring him that night at the bar. It brushed over the memories that they made and how much fun she’d had in the few short months, even describing how those months felt like a lifetime in the best possible way. She had signed off with a ‘see you in a month, I promise I won’t ignore you this time when you try to be my friend’ and a smiley face followed by a simple signature of her name, ‘Riley.’ But at the very bottom of the letter was a separate sign off. A p.s. note that she felt, despite their attempts to be friends, she felt was needed.
“P.S. Thank you for showing me how I deserved to be loved. Just know that you will always be the first guy I’ve ever genuinely and rightfully loved. Love Always, Riles.”
She pulled one last thing out of her purse, the copy of ‘Dear John’ that she had bought after he made her watch the movie. As someone who almost always preferred to read the book first before watching any tv or movie adaptation, Matthew insisted that she forgo the whole process and just watch the movie with him. Little did he know, she was already ordering it off of Amazon and read it in one sitting once it arrived at her apartment. On the cover, she left a sticky note with a simple message of “now read the book, i promise it’s just as good :)” followed by a bunch of page numbers, but only two of which were highlighted, simply because they were two of her now favorite quotes that just seemed oh so fitting for their situation, ironic too since it was one of his favorite movies.
“In our time together, you claimed a special place in my heart, a place that I will carry with me forever and that no one can replace” and “Our story has three parts; a beginning, a middle and an end. And while that’s how all stories play out, I still can’t believe ours didn’t last forever.”
Cheesy? Sure, but she knew that he would find some appreciation for it. Once she made sure that he would be able to find them, she took a deep break and looked around the room one last time. This was where everything had come to an end, in this very room. Where she cried and cried until she fell asleep on her last night here in his arms. It should hurt her heart being in this room, but just like stepping foot into his apartment…it felt like home. A warm, fuzzy feeling was inside of her chest, trying its best to cover up the ache and the heaviness she’d been feeling nonstop since later Saturday night. She closed her eyes and took a deep, calming breath before opening them and exhaling, taking the first step to walk out of his room and not letting herself stop and slow down to take in the apartment one last time, because then she knew she would have the hardest time trying to leave.
When she opened the door, she turned the small lock on the inside doorknob so the door would lock behind her and she paused in place. It was hard trying to convince herself not to take one last look, but she caved in, wanting to say goodbye even just in her mind to a place that’d become a safe place for her. She only allowed herself a few moments before she walked out of the apartment and shut the door behind her, making sure that it was locked. Then, she booked it like hell to the elevator, never taking another look, not even when she got into the elevator, forcing herself to stand in front of the buttons as she pressed the lobby button, her lack of having the key fob keeping her from going onto any other floor, even though she wasn’t going to.
The moment the elevator doors opened on the lobby, she kept her focus straight ahead where she could still see Jacob’s car parked out front. She bypassed the still empty receptionist desk and quickened her pace, feeling her heart race in her chest as she pushed open the door and walked out into the summer heat, the sunlight hitting her face and making her squint her eyes. Her chest was rising and falling fast as if she was suffocating with the memory she was leaving behind as she left the apartment one last time. And once she stood outside, she was able to take a deep breath, feeling her chest fully expand and deflate as she exhaled.
“Hey Ri, you good?” Brendan asked, his window rolled down as he now sat in her seat.
“Yeah,” she nodded, taking a deep breath and exhaling again before turning back and looking over her shoulder at the apartment building, her eyes instantly going to where the tenth floor would be. “I think I will be.”
DAY 203 – JULY 22ND, 2022 [ TRICKED RECONCILIATION ]
“I already told you earlier” Riley said, looking at Claire and Brendan as she laid her book down onto her stomach. “I don’t want to go and you can’t make me. I’m literally 24-years-old.”
Brendan snorted, leaning in her doorway. “I told you she wouldn’t go, I don’t know why you bothered trying to–”
Claire turned around to face their younger brother, pointing at him. “Go wait in the living room, we’ll be right out.”
“Fine,” Brendan held his hands up in defense as he stood up straight and turned around and walked down the hall and eventually down the stairs and out of view, leaving just Riley and Claire there in Riley’s room.
Claire double checked to make sure he was out of sight before she closed the bedroom door behind her and then made her way over to Riley’s closet. “You’re wasting your time, Claire–”
“No, you’re wasting your time,” Claire replied, opening her closet doors and skimming through the clothes. “I know you’re still upset about the way things ended with Matthew but you leave for Boston in a month and a half and you haven’t done anything besides lay in bed and read your books since you got home from Calgary.”
“I’m not upset about Matthew,” Riley said, resting her book down and staring at Claire. “I mean sure, it’s not all sunshine and daisies, but I’ve accepted that life isn’t fair and the situation overall sucks but there’s nothing that I can do about it. I did my crying, I’ve accepted it and now I’m just going to wait until it’s time to leave for Boston and enjoy my favorite things while I do.” She picked her book back up and turned the page. “Now get your nose out of my closet and go to that party.”
“Ri, I love you a lot. You’re my sister and my best friend, we’ve spent our entire lives together. We grew up together and we know each other better than anyone else in this world. So I don’t know why you think you can pull this ‘I’m fine’ bullshit over on me. Because if anyone knows you’re not fine, it’s me.” She grabbed an off the shoulder shirt and tossed it at Riley’s feet, a pair of jeans following after and then she closed the closet and walked over to her dresser, grabbing a strapless bra and adding that onto the pile. “So get up, get dressed and meet Brendan and I out in the living room in ten minutes or so help me God, I will drag you out of bed and to the party looking exactly like this, by your hair.”
Riley sat there as she watched Claire open the bedroom door and walk through it, shutting it behind her once more. On one hand, she knew Claire was right. Her time here at home was dwindling down fast and before she knew it, she’d be in her new apartment in Boston, alone. But on the other hand, she just wanted to spend her time, especially at night, doing the things she enjoyed. Things that filled her time and preoccupied her mind from drifting off onto wondering what Matthew was doing or how their vacation to Greece went. If he was back home now or if he went off on another trip with friends.
She bookmarked her page and set the book off to the side before tossing her blankets off and getting out of bed. Grabbing the clothes Claire had set out, Riley changed over to the jeans and shirt, getting dressed into real clothes that weren’t sweatpants and a t-shirt for the first time all day. She took the time to get herself ready and looking like she hadn’t just spent so many hours locked away in her room, lying in bed and reading a book before she left her room, seeing Claire and Brendan sitting there, both looking surprised.
“Well damn, you actually did it,” he said, looking at Claire and uncrossing his arms. “Well, let’s get going, yeah?”
He walked towards the front door, Riley standing there as Claire came up beside her and draping her arm over her shoulders with a smile. “You’ll have fun tonight, Ri, I promise.”
Maybe Riley’s idea of fun and Claire’s idea of fun were close, but not the same. Sure, it was nice to see some of her friends from high school and some of Claire and Brednan’s friends too at the house of one of Riley’s friends. Their city was large, but small. Everyone here had a sixth degree relationship with someone else.
And that's something Riley should’ve remembered when she saw Matthew standing inside talking to one of her and Claire’s friends from high school. At first, she had to convince herself that it wasn’t actually him, she was just imagining it. But when he leaned his head back and laughed, she felt something squeeze around her heart, because she’d know that dimpled smile anywhere. She stopped herself from going inside to grab herself a soda, instead walking around the backyard to try and find Claire or Brendan to tell them that Matthew was here and she wanted to go home.
Yet somehow, they were nowhere to be found and she was left to figure it out herself. She texted their sibling group chat, sending an ‘SOS, need to talk’ message before sitting herself down on the edge of the pool and rolling her pant legs up as high as she could before dipping her feet into the cool water. It was only a little over a week away before their one month of not seeing each other or talking was to come to an end. Then they could try to be friends again, but the feeling inside of her chest and her racing heart was telling her that a month wasn’t enough.
That maybe they would need more time, or God forbid, not be able to be friends at all.
“Hey…” She felt her pulse in her throat as she looked up to see Matthew standing there to her left, his hands buried deep into his shorts pockets.
“Hey,” she replied, smiling softly as she motioned for him to take a seat. “You can sit…if you want.”
She watched as he hesitated for a moment before nodding and taking his hands out of his pockets and sitting himself down next to her, taking his flip flops off and placing them down next to her before putting his feet into the pool. They sat there in silence for a few moments, the party in the background filling the silence between them.
“How was the trip to Greece?” She asked, breaking the silence and swallowing the knot in her throat. “I saw the pictures…but how was it?”
“Good, it was good, a lot of fun,” he nodded, holding his bud light in his hand. “It would’ve been a lot more fun with you there, but you know…it was still a good time. How have you been?”
“Good,” she nodded, looking at him and shrugging. “Just a lot of shifting through stuff. My mom’s trying to get rid of half of my things, I think she’s planning on turning my bedroom into a craft room or something.”
“Mom’s tried that with Brady’s room a couple of times,” he laughed softly. “Said we’ve shared a room before, we can share one again.”
“You might not have to worry about that longer though, I saw he and Emma got engaged. I wanted to text him and congratulate him, but…you know.”
“Yeah, it’s about time too. I swear they’re practically married though,” he laughed, taking a sip of his beer. “I’ll tell them you said congratulations though.”
“Thanks,” she nodded, playing with her hands in her lap and kicking her feet in the water.
Matthew finished his drink and cleared his throat, looking at the can and then at her. “Would you want to come with me to get a refill? So we can keep catching up and I won't lose you in the crowd?”
Something inside of her told her maybe it wasn’t the best idea, but it was greatly overshadowed by the feeling of missing him for the last twenty days. “Yeah, okay,” she smiled and nodded her head.
Matthew stood himself up and reached his hand out to help her stand up too. He held her hand for a few seconds longer even after she was standing up, but then he let go and the two of them made their way into the house. Over the music they talked about what they’d been up to since they last saw each other. Matthew had gone into more detail about the Greece vacation, the sights they saw, the food and drink, renting a boat for a day and how clear the water had been. He told her that she would’ve loved it and she agreed, she would have. She told him that she wished she would’ve gone.
One of their mutual friends, which turned out to be one of her friends from high school’s brother, who was a friend of Matt’s, tried to get them to join in on some drinking game which had everyone already playing, giggling and laughing as they watched two people trying to down their drinks faster than the other. But Matthew just grabbed her hand and led her away from the group so they’d stop trying to lure them in. When they finally stopped walking, they found themselves in one of the few quiet rooms in the house– a room that looked like it was a guest room.
Riley would be lying if she said that her heart wasn’t racing and her body temperature wasn’t rising at the mere fact that she was alone in a bedroom with Matthew for the first time in months. But like he always did, he was able to bring her at ease but just…talking. They talked about her move to Boston, how she found an apartment and was set to move in in late August, early September. How she had started to talk to the two other co-workers she was hired on the same job announcement with and that they seemed like really nice people. He told her again, just how happy he was and proud he was of her for getting the job and that he knew she’d do great things.
It felt like no time between them had passed at all and they were both sitting on the bed, laughing and talking like they hadn’t broken up and were doing a horrible job at trying to be friends– when the tension that they had was still so heavy and clear, that it was hard not to notice. So maybe that’s why after the laughter had simmered down, she leaned in and kissed him before quickly pulling back, ready to apologize.
And maybe that’s why, instead of letting her apologize and agreeing that it wasn’t the best idea, Matthew cupped her face and leaned back in, kissing her back.
They both knew that what they were doing wasn’t the best idea. This would set them back again on their journey to being friends. With each layer of clothing that was removed, it was another chip away at the shield she had put up to protect her heart and herself after their break up. She would once again have that aching, open wound she’d need to nurse back to health once it was all said and done.
For right now though, she didn’t care. Because all she’s wanted since that night in his apartment, was to have one more night or day or hour or minute to be in his arms. To kiss him again. And now that she was here, in this moment and getting what her heart had been wishing for the last three weeks…she never wanted it to end.
But it had to, and when they laid there together after it was all over– just like before, it felt like nothing had changed. He had his arm draped over her and she was curled into his side and laying her head on his chest. ‘This is how it’s supposed to be, right here…just us.’ She thought and kept repeating that thought in her head, even as there was that aching feeling in her chest that knew it wasn’t going to last.
Riley wasn’t sure of how long they laid there for, not long enough for the party to be over because they could still here the muffled sounds of music and the guests from the other side of the locked door. But long enough to where she knew that if they didn’t leave the room now, their lack of presence would be noted by those who knew of their relationship. So she was the first one who made the move to get up out of bed and start to get dressed, Matthew following soon after her as they didn’t speak. And suddenly she found herself regretting her choice to get dressed, because laying there in silence was so much better than getting dressed in silence.
“Oh…” he said, picking up her shirt which had soaked up the remainder of his beer that had been spilled at some point while they were undressing. “You can’t wear this, it reeks of beer. Here,” he took off his shirt, an old London Knights one she’d worn time and time before as a pajama shirt. “You can wear mine.”
“Thanks,” she said, putting on his shirt and then taking her beer soaked shirt from him balling it up and shoving it in her purse.
“Riles…” God she missed hearing him call her that, it was her favorite thing in the world she’d come to find. But right now, she wished he was calling her anything else. “I…maybe we just got a little too ahead of ourselves with this…trying to be friends, you know?”
She could feel the tears burn in her eyes as she choked them back, trying not to let the knot in her throat stop her from taking deep controlled breaths. “Mhhm.”
“It’s just…it’s too soon and then this,” he shook his head, exhaling. “I don’t regret this at all, Riles. Because I love you, I do. But I don’t, I’m not sure if I can be your friend and love you at the same time.”
Riley just nodded again, making the first move towards the door as he followed behind. “I get it, I do.”
“So maybe,” he took another deep breath and exhaled, putting his hands in his pockets again. “Maybe, it’s going to take a lot longer…and maybe we shouldn’t–”
“Matthew, please,” she said, shaking her head. “You don’t need to say it, I understand what you’re saying, I promise. Thank you for everything, and I don’t regret this either and I love you.” She felt the knot in her throat choke her for a second before she cleared it and nodded, turning away from him. “I think I’m just going to go home.”
He nodded, and reached around her, unlocking the door and opening it before stepping aside and letting her leave the room. She heard the door close behind her soon after, probably to let himself wait a bit before he left the room as to avoid any speculation, though that was going to be hard considering he was left shirtless and she was wearing his shirt. She made her way outside after not seeing Claire or Brendan anywhere in the living room and kitchen, eventually catching sight of Brendan standing off by the jacuzzi. She walked over as fast as her feet would take her, clutching her purse and her shirt against her and fighting like hell to keep the tears from falling.
“Hey Ri,” Brendan smiled, his smile falling once she got closer. “What’s wrong?”
“I want to go home,” she spoke softly, Brendan ushering her off to the side and away from friends so they could speak privately. “Matthew’s here a-and I just want to go home.”
“Of course he’s here,” he said, looking confused. “Didn’t Claire tell you he was going to be here?”
She looked at him, confused and taken aback when she felt a pair of arms around her shoulders and someone resting their chin on her shoulder. “Hi little sister, are you having fun?” Claire smiled, letting her arms fall to the side when Riley stepped out of them. “What’s wrong?”
“You knew he was going to be here?” Riley asked, her bottom lip trembling.
Claire’s smile falling into a frown told Riley everything that she needed to know. “Wow,” she huffed, shaking her head. “Out of everyone, I thought that you would understand how it would make me feel to see him again. I told– I cried to you about everything and you…” she stopped, sniffling and shaking her head again. “I’m going home.”
“I’ll drop you off and come back,” Brendan said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder before looking at Claire and walking with Riley as they left the poolside area of the backyard and through a backyard fence.
When they made it to the front of the house, Brendan dug into his pockets to grab the keys and as they made their way to the car, Riley spotted Matthew getting into the backseat of what she presumed to be an uber. And soon she realized, as she watched the uber slowly drive away…that this was how life was going to be from now on. No more Matthew. And just like the uber had drifted off into the distance and out of view, he too would eventually fade from her thoughts.
And the peace he brought would go along with him.
DAY 244 – SEPTEMBER 1ST, 2022 [ A PEACEFUL REALIZATION ] *EPILOGUE*
“Well Riley, I have to say that your apartment looks quite nice,” her dad smiled, taking a look around the living room and the furniture they’d set up to make the 800 square foot apartment feel a little more homey.
“Thanks, Dad,” she laughed, sitting on one of the bar stools at her counter. “But I meant it when I said you guys can’t stay here tonight. You’ve stayed here the last two nights helping me set up, but now it’s time for me to spend my first night alone in my apartment.”
“They grow up so fast, don’t they?” Brendan teased, resting his hands on her shoulders.
In the 41 days since that night when she’d last seen Matthew…a lot had changed. For the first two weeks, she and Claire were at odds. It didn’t help that Claire had also gone off to Sweden to visit Jacob’s family for a week, but when she came back, she had apologized to Riley for what she had done. Telling her that her reasoning was that she knew how much she’d missed Matthew and she knew that Matthew had missed her too– and that maybe, if they’d gotten back together that they would be able to see a new solution through.
All she wanted was for her sister to feel better again, she wanted the best for her little sister and though she went about it the wrong way, she was still sorry for doing it and hiding Matthew’s attendance at the party from her. She spent the rest of August spending at much time with her family in between packing and sending emails to work to set up and confirm her first day and what she’d need to bring.
She was nervous to be moving from home, but at the same time she was excited. This was something she had worked for her entire life and she was finally on the journey to reaching it. It was something new and unknown, but that adventure made it nerve wracking…and thanks to Matthew, she’d learned that sometimes, those nerves when you’re about to do something for the first time…were just excitement hiding in the wings.
Her family and Jacob had tagged along to help her drive to Boston at the end of August and have spent the last three days with her, helping her unpack and set up her apartment. Tomorrow afternoon, they’d be flying back home and she’d be in the city of Boston all alone. But tonight, tonight was going to be her first night in her apartment alone– and she was both looking forward to it and hating it at the same time.
“Okay, so we’ll go get in the car so we can go to dinner,” Claire said, as their parents and Brendnan made their way to the front door. “Do you mind waiting for Jacob when he comes out of the bathroom?”
“Not at all, we’ll be right down there,” Riley smiled, waving them off as she spun herself on her barstool.
Shortly after, Jacob came walking out of the bathroom, looking around confused. “Did they leave us?”
“They’re just in the car,” Riley said, hopping off the stool. “But since I’ve got you here, I thought I’d ask…how the convo with our parents go?”
He smiled, nodding his head as they left her apartment. “Really good, they loved the ring. Said that Claire would love it too.”
“I told you she would,” Riley smiled, bumping into him as she looked her apartment behind them. “You sure you’re ready to be a part of the family? I mean…have you met us?”
“I have and you guys are great,” he laughed, bumping her back.
A little bit after their trip to Sweden, Jacob had facetimed Riley asking if he could get her opinion on something. And when she answered, he showed that he was at a jewelry store in Sweden, where he was staying with family a little longer and said that he was wanting to pick out an engagement ring for Claire, but wanted a little insight onto which she might like. She helped him pick it out and when he came into St. Louis the night before they drove up to Boston, he sat their parents down and asked for their permission to marry Claire.
Things had been so hectic that Riley hadn’t been able to get Jacob alone long enough to ask him how it had all gone, but now that they had a little bit of time, she took full advantage of it.
“Is the plan still the same?”
“Mhhm,” Jacob nodded, a fond smile on his face. “I’m going to take her to Lake Louise when we get back to Calgary, just where we went on our first date and then I’m going to ask her. Hopefully she says yes.”
“She’ll definitely say yes,” Riley smiled, nodding her head. “She really loves you.”
“Thanks, Riley, that means a lot,” he replied, the elevator doors opening into the lobby and them walking out. “And I know you guys had a bit of a falling out, but she loves you a lot and never meant to hurt your feelings. You know her, she just…wants everyone to be happy and puts it on herself to make sure they are.”
Riley nodded, sucking in her lips at the mention of their falling out. She felt nervous, but she knew that the nagging feeling wouldn’t go away until she asked, because she knew that the two of them were still in touch. “So…do you know how he’s doing? I haven’t really kept up with the hockey stuff because…you know.”
“He’s good,” Jacob replied, hesitating himself as he took a deep breath and Riley knew he was unsure if he wanted to answer. “He’s excited about going to Florida–”
“FLORIDA?” She asked, eyes wide. “What? Since when?”
“Um…maybe end of July? Right around the time you and Claire had your falling out. He got traded to the Panthers.”
Riley remembered him mentioning about how he and his agent were in talks with the Flames about his contract, but he seemed so hesitant to talk about it and not in the mood too, like something was bothering him and she knew she didn’t want to push further about it so she didn’t. She had no idea that days later he’d be traded.
“Wow, that’s…big,” she said, crossing her arms. “Is he Captain?”
“No, but I don’t doubt he’ll work his way up to it…you know Chucky. He’s really excited to be down there since he’s got an old teammate who plays for them. I think it’ll be a good change for him.”
Riley nodded, not continuing the conversation as they walked out of the apartment building and found her parents rental car, getting inside.
She tried not to let the news be forefront in her brain for the rest of dinner. This was her last night with her family and she wanted to soak up every second of it, especially since she knew that in just short of a week, Claire and Jacob would be back in Calgary and engaged. She knew she was going to miss having them just right there in the same room and knew she’d have to adjust to them being a phone call away instead. She was successful in turning her focus towards them, and by the end of dinner when they dropped her off at her apartment building, her stomach was hurting from laughing so hard.
It was the first time she’d laughed that hard since her break up with Matthew.
There was no fighting from keeping him out of her mind as she made her way into the elevator and the heavy metal slowly climbed the stories to her apartment floor– floor number ten, go figure. But she held it off until she was in the safety of her own apartment, letting the emotions flow out of her as she leaned against the door and sighed.
The silence was loud as she moved through her new apartment, trying to adjust to the layout. She walked over to her keurig, filling it up and placing a mug onto it to make herself something hot to drink. While she waited, she walked back to her room and got undressed, switching over into some pajama pants and an all too-familiar shirt that she’d tried to give back before she left, but allowed herself to keep it since it had been in her possession for weeks, and she knew for a fact that if she even tried to return it, she’d be told to keep it.
It had slowly turned into her favorite shirt the way that the cotton had been washed and dried so many times that the green and white in the Knights logo had started to crack and the material was soft against her skin.
She put on her slippers and walked back out of her room, over to the kitchen where she could see the steam rising from her Banff souvenir mug. Picking it up, she walked back out of the kitchen and over to her balcony door, sliding it open before walking out into the cool night air and shutting the door just barely behind her. She sat down in her chair, taking in the sight of the city lights all around her and the sounds of the traffic and people walking below brought her ease.
Riley brought out her phone, unlocking it and opening her instagram app. Typing in his username, she brought up Matthew’s profile and allowed herself to scroll through his pictures. The last time she’d seen it, it was before their meet up at the party when he’d posted pictures of the Greece trip. Matthew wasn’t one for posting on social media too much, so in that time, he’d only posted four things. One was a tribute video to his time in Calgary, another was a picture of him sitting at a press conference with the Florida Panthers logo behind him, wearing a polo and his dimpled smile. Another was a photo montage of what looked like a boys golfing trip, which Riley laughed at because of course. And his most recent, just a few weeks prior, was an action shot of him in the white and red panthers uniform. It was a far stretch from his red with Calgary…but it fit him well.
Out of habit, she found herself looking up at the sky, seeing the stars that the city lights hadn’t managed to outshine and when she blinked…for a split second…she thought she saw a shooting star.
As the thought passed, she smiled to herself and took a sip of her hot chocolate, looking at the mug once she was finished and leaned further back into her chair. Shortly after their run in at the party, she unfollowed him on instagram as a way to try and cleanse him from her life. A way to make the transition easier for her. But what Riley had discovered was that this was how life was going to be from now on. Sure, there was no more Matthew in her day to day life, no more random texts or facetime calls or phone calls, not even an instagram comment or a snapchat. But there was no cleansing him out of her life.
He left a big mark on her and in her life. He was the first boy she had ever loved and who loved her back, who taught her what it felt like to be loved. He was special, important. She could never push him out of her life. So while he was here for just a short while and gone in a flash, just like a shooting star…he was always going to be there in her memories.
And one day, she’d have to come to terms with that, but for now…it was just nice to think back and smile on the memories anytime a little piece of him popped up in her daily life.
He was everywhere and that was okay, because he had loved her and she loved him too and one could never easily forget it.
#again this is a fic i wasn't even sure i was going to post#just bc its kinda self indulgent when i wrote it ((and it was never a hockey fic))#so a lot of editing and adding shit went into it#but just know that yk this fic stemmed from me trying to basically come to terms w a break up and it was my healthy way#of getting my emotions and feelings out!!!!#matthew tkachuk fic#matthew tkachuk imagine#matthew tkachuk writing#matthew tkachuk one shot#matthew tkachuk oneshot#florida panthers one shot#florida panthers writing#florida panthers imagine#florida panthers oneshot#nhl writing#nhl one shot#nhl imagine#nhl fic#nhl oneshot#hockey writing#hockey one shot#hockey fic#hockey oneshot#florida panthers fic
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Pedro Pascal Character Prompts! This list includes: Agent Jack “Whiskey” Daniels, Javi Gutierrez, Max Lord, Din Djarin, and Max Phillips. If you’re inspired by any of these, pls tag me and I’d love to read it! 💜
1. Whenever and wherever you and Agent Jack “Whiskey” Daniels want to have alone time, (in a hideout cabin, his office at Statesman HQ, hotel room, before/during/after a mission, whatever) he’ll put his cowboy hat on the door handle as his way of saying, “Do Not Disturb”. Eggsy, Tequila or someone else was fed up with it like, “Stop fooling around and suit up! We have a mission, there’s work to do. No more cowboy hat! Cowboy hat is coming off the door, okay!? I’m coming in so quit doing whatever you’re doing!” And took the hat off the door to try to get you and/or Whiskey to hurry up and get moving. Only to walk in on you and Whiskey in a compromising position. (You’re riding him like a horse in cowgirl or reverse cowgirl position or he has you tied to the bed with his non-electric lasso and your legs over his shoulders while eating you out. Or a mystery third option, whatever you desire.) The intruding agent is traumatized but Jack is unfazed by being walked in on. He doesn’t even pause or falter in his loving on you while he nonchalantly says,
“Oh c’mon, kid. You know what cowboy hat on the door means. Everyone knows what it means.”
2. Something cute (or sexy, up to you) where Agent Whiskey is being needy and/or flirty, and uses his non-electric lasso to rope you in by the waist and demand a kiss…or two…or ten. Maybe you try to walk away from him for one reason or other and he’s not having it. He’s caught you fair and square and isn’t letting you go until you give him lots of sugar, Sugar! 😘
3. You’re Champ’s daughter and also a Statesman agent but oh no when you and Agent Whiskey mix business with pleasure after you catch feelings for each other. Over the course of many years of going on missions together, it’s no surprise you’ve grown close. It’s sort of forbidden love because you’re the boss’s daughter, so you and Jack often have to get creative to keep your escapades secret. You’d rather Jack not get fired or killed by your father. If you both ditch your trackers and earpieces and go dark for a few minutes or an hour to have some much needed “alone time”, you can later blame it on bad reception or needing to lay low to not get detected by the enemy. But what if the way Champ discovers you and Whiskey are together is you’re at a mission briefing and you accidentally say, “Daddy, can you pass the [item]?” And both Jack and Champ reach for it at the same time. Uh oh.
4. You and Jack go to one of those country bars that have mechanical bulls for customers to ride. (Could be for a mission, to get close to a target or could just be leisure time). There’s a friendly contest happening where the person who can stay on the bull the longest gets a great prize. After a few drinks, Jack dares you to try it. To his surprise, you master riding the mechanical bull. You don’t fumble even once or ever come close to getting knocked off, no matter how fast and erratic the mechanical bull’s movements become. While watching you, Jack is fucking turned on by the way you move your hips back and forth to shift your weight and keep your center of balance. You say something like, “Riding mechanical bulls is much easier than real bulls.” Jack blinks and looks at you in disbelief, now with questions on his tongue but you just say, “I don’t wanna talk about it.”
Optional Bonus: Somehow he convinces you to “ride home on a real Cowboy” and spend the night with him. You've got him pinned down as you try to ride him within an inch of his life and he's just laying back with his arms behind his head and going, "That's all you got? For a girl who can expertly hold onto a bull, it looks like you're having trouble staying on." His cocky grin makes you wanna slap him but that’s when he flips you over and brings out a flogger, smacking your ass with it as he grips your hair and starts pounding into you from behind. “Don’t worry, honey. you can whip me next round if you’re good for me.”
5. You’ve been blackmailed or threatened by Lucas to infiltrate Javi’s luxurious home in Majorca under the guise of a new assistant and get as close to him as possible, with the goal being to eventually kill him. You don’t want to, but you can’t refuse the head of one of the most powerful crime families in Spain. He’s holding too much over you. The more time you spend with Javi, you admire his spirit and ambitious nature towards film. It wasn’t supposed to happen this way nor under these dire circumstances, but you fall in love. You nearly crack under the pressure of your predicament, wanting so badly to tell Javi the truth - especially when months pass and he proposes. You’re finally ready to confess everything, even if it means forfeiting your life.
But before you can even answer his proposal, Lucas destroys your hopes and dreams of a happy future. He's kidnapped a politician’s daughter and bursts in to reveal your affiliation with him. Javi feels betrayed by your deception and doubts if anything about your relationship was real. With your dirty past exposed and your cover blown, you’re resolved to save Javi from his cruel and bloodthirsty cousin no matter the cost. Even if he never loves you again, even if you die trying to save his life, you won’t let Lucas get away with his crimes. You just hope Javi can forgive you eventually.
6. You come from a very average upbringing. Your life isn’t the most luxurious or exciting, but you’re happy enough. Very rarely do you get to travel or go on vacations, let alone internationally, but somehow fate lands you in Spain. (Maybe you’re on a business trip, rare vacation, studying abroad, etc.) While on a small ferry boat, you and the people you’re with get lost due to fog or darkness and accidentally end up off the coast near the luxurious home of Javi Gutierrez. When the boat hits obscured rocks and everyone evacuates, he and Gabriela run out to rescue you from the water, bringing you all safely back to shore. As Javi wraps a warm blanket around you, your hands brush his.
You nearly stumble and fall from how handsome he is when you see his face through the light emitted from the flashlights. He catches you, assuming you’re wobbly from the shock of the accident. He lets you lean on him and helps you walk as he guides you inside his mansion. He and Gabriela are kind enough to let you and everybody else stay as long as needed to recuperate, but Javi seems especially drawn to you and wants you to stay, even after everybody else has made plans to leave. Well, your life just got a lot more exciting, hasn’t it?
7. You’re an American studying abroad in Spain and somehow fate lands you in the arms of Javi Gutierrez. You don’t recognize him or know who he is at all, and he finds your ignorance to his identity very refreshing. It allows him to just be himself around you and not put up a facade as figurehead to a crime family. You swap phone numbers and he takes you out for lunch dates, car rides for sightseeing, etc. His home in Majorca is beautiful. You enjoy any time spent with him, even if it’s in your small apartment or rental car. He’s just as interested in you and your studies as you are with him and his passion for filmmaking. You’re both ambitious in your own unique ways, and while you come from very different social classes and wealth brackets, you develop a camaraderie.
You’re both deeply saddened when you admit you’ll have to return home eventually. Javi loves you so much that he was willing to let you live with him or pay for your living expenses so you wouldn’t have to leave, but you’d never ask that of him or accept such a generous offer. He can’t bear to be apart from you forever, so he offers a compromise: He’ll endure a long distance relationship and support you while you’re pursuing your studies and career of choice, but he’d like you to come visit him during winter and spring breaks. He’ll pay for your travel expenses. Please don’t argue with him on this. Or he’ll come to you and fly to the US if it’d make you feel better. Even a week or two of having you to himself would be enough to satiate his cravings for you and hold him over when you’re apart again. (Along with maybe the intimate photos you’ve taken for his eyes only 🤫) It’s a few years later when he flies over for your college graduation to congratulate you, a small velvet box in his suit pocket.
8. You and Javi were once a very happy couple, so in love you felt sick. You were just a plain and average American exchange student when you met him, but he became your best friend and you couldn’t have asked for a better partner. You kept your blossoming romance secret for a very long time, deeming it unsafe due to Lucas and his criminal activities. Despite your circumstances, Javi loved you so much he couldn’t bear to wait anymore and asked you to marry him. You accepted. You both understood that you’d have to have a long engagement, since you couldn’t marry until somehow you were able to get away from Lucas and his crime organization. Javi thought he was discreet enough when sneaking in and out of the mansion to see you. You thought you were thorough, making sure you left no visible trace of yourself behind when you left his place under the cover of night.
You and Javi went unsuspected for a while, but somehow Lucas connected the dots. He threatened you and/or your loved ones, and at first you tried not to let him get to you. You thought your love for Javi would be strong enough to endure this, but Lucas’ tactics of intimidation and threatening became too much for you to handle, culminating in him threatening to break Javi’s neck if you didn’t break his heart. So you broke off your engagement to Javi, giving him back the ring. This caused a huge argument in which you lied and pretended you didn’t love him anymore, even going so far as to say there was another man when he kept pushing you for an explanation. You left without telling him the truth, since Lucas made it more than clear he’d kill you if you told Javi anything. You go back home to the US and don’t see him again for a long time. But when the fiasco with Nic Cage and the CIA is finally over and Lucas is arrested, Javi wants only two things in the world: To make his movie and to find you. He’s determined to get you back and marry you now that he’s a filmmaker and can provide you with a safe and happy life.
9. Christmas Carol Inspired: Back in college, you met Maxwell Lorenzano. He himself couldn’t afford to enroll, but he caught your eye while doing custodial work on campus. This allowed him to sort of have access to the library, but it wasn’t enough since he couldn’t take any books home and he soon wanted more. You wanted to help, so you’d check books out for him so he wouldn’t get in trouble for theft. You became friends and then sweethearts as you gave him the emotional and financial support he needed during his struggles to rise to the top. Even if it was something as simple as buying a muffin for him at the coffee shop, you’d do it. He’d tell you all about his hopes and dreams for the future, but never mention his past. You were so proud of him when he founded Black Gold Cooperative and elated when he proposed to you. The ring was just a plain band with your and his initials engraved into it. There was no gem, but it was perfect to you.
But years went by and your engagement kept stretching on and on, with no wedding date set. No matter how many times you asked him about it, he wouldn’t commit and deflected the topic. You knew he wanted more than anything to become a successful businessman, and now he’s achieved it. He’s the CEO of Black Gold Cooperative, a television personality popular with the public, has a mansion and luxurious clothes, cars, Rolexes and rings. You just never thought he’d cast you aside and neglect you. He always wants more, more, more, never satisfied with what he has. With his new name of Max Lord and rich lifestyle, you hardly recognize him anymore. He’s so busy and hardly makes time for you. It’s like he’s erased you from his life almost completely. You’ve loved him for so many years, overcame many hardships and challenges with him. But this is different. This is too much for you.
Despite how he’s changed and treated you in recent years, you still love him. You know he’s a good man underneath it all, but this is not the kind of life you signed up for when you accepted his proposal. It’s because you love him that you enter his golden office and interrupt his meeting with an investor to set your engagement ring on his desk. You’ve done all you could for him, the last kindness you can offer is to release him from the long ago promise he’d made and wish him well. You’ll always be grateful to him for loving you. You both had very little back then, but your lives were simple and full of love. You’ll treasure those memories always. Now he has everything he’s ever wanted in life, and that doesn’t include you. Maybe it did once, but not anymore.
10. (Possible sequel idea to the above prompt, but can be stand-alone): You and Max Lord were once in love, but the romance eventually fell through and you broke it off, even if you didn’t want to and it was a last resort. Max never fully got over you, no matter how many women he fooled around with while living his new, luxurious life. It all felt so hollow and meaningless now without you. No woman could ever compare to you. To everyone in the world it seems he’s a man who has everything his heart desires, but he still wants you. You're the motivation behind his search for the Dreamstone. After becoming the Dreamstone itself, Max uses his powers to trick your current partner into wishing for something so that he can take you back in exchange. What Max didn’t foresee was the effect it would have on you. You’re still yourself, but it’s like you’re under a strange love spell. You’re totally normal, but you’ve gone back to loving Max the way you did before your breakup, as if time has reversed. Nothing about you has changed.
Oh, except one teeny tiny thing: You have no memory of your other relationship with your (now former) partner. They’re a total stranger to you now. It’s as if the events surrounding yours and Max’s deteriorating relationship and breakup never happened. Max isn’t sad or guilty about this development. He justifies his actions to himself, self-assured he can make you so much happier and love you better. You loved him first, and he’ll be your one and only. He’s realized what terrible mistakes he’s made in letting you slip away from him, and he wants to make it up to you. He never blamed you for leaving, the deterioration of your relationship was solely his fault and a consequence of his own failings as a lover, but he’s changed. He’s become a better man and realized what’s most important. He wants more than anything to marry you so he can spend the rest of his life proving it to you. This is a second chance for you both.
11. You’re Max Lord’s ex-wife and mother to Alistair. You’ve had boyfriends after your divorce, but none of them really stuck. You have joint custody with your ex-husband. You and Max love your boy more than anything in the world, that’s at least one thing you can agree on. When you drop off Alistair at his dad’s workplace for his weekend, you grow concerned about Max’s disheveled appearance, especially his bloodshot eyes and bleeding ears. You urge him to see a doctor, unaware of what he’s done. Though you divorced, you can’t help it that the love you have for him still lingers. You still care, even a little bit. He brushes you off and assures you it’s nothing. When Max becomes addicted to the Dreamstone’s power and nearly causes the end of the world, it’s not just Alistair that’s running and screaming for Max to save him, you’re there too. To the very end you protect your son, even if it means shielding him with your body and getting seriously hurt by the destruction around you.
Seeing you and your boy in peril makes Max renounce his wish. He comes to save you both, but gets scared when Alistair runs out from the trees alone. Until Alistair leads him back to you, badly injured and in urgent need of medics, but alive. Your ex-husband and son stay by your side while you’re recovering in hospital, and it’s during this time that Max admits he’s never stopped loving you. He asks for a second chance to be a better husband than he was the first time. He asks if you would ever consider marrying him…Again? You tease him and say you’ll entertain the thought, but he needs to take you out on some dates first.
12. Still just a child at 50 years old, it’s clear Grogu will outlive both you and Din by hundreds of years. Tell an angsty or bittersweet story centering around Grogu’s life, the years spent with his human mom and dad, including when he goes through the inevitable deaths of both you and Din. (Whether you outlive Din, Din outlives you, or you die together is up to you.) How would Grogu grieve and continue his life without either of you by his side? How does your son spend his days after you’re both gone? Would he keep beloved keepsakes that once belonged to you or Din to remember you both by? Would he have a sort of shrine dedicated to you both or visit your shared resting place? How does he live out the rest of his years, up until the end of his own journey and his time comes to be reunited with his parents? When he reaches old age, he knows you and Din will be happy to see him again. He wants to be held in Mama and Daddy’s arms again, even if he’s not so little anymore. And when he does finally return home, he’ll have many stories to tell.
13. Somehow Evan intentionally or inadvertently sabotaged yours and Max’s relationship so badly that his words or actions drove you to leave Max and/or drop out of college. This is why Max slept with Evan’s girlfriend, which only resulted in Evan getting him kicked out of school for cheating. When he returns from Romania as a vampire, he’s determined not only to get under Evan’s skin as much as possible by watching him squirm and question his own sanity while he turns the whole department into vampires. He also wants to find and reconcile with you so he can turn you and fuck you on Ted’s desk. You had plans to marry after finishing college, and he still wants to make you his bride - in more ways than one.
14. You’re the vampire that turns Max when he attends school in Romania. You take him under your wing not only as a fledgling, but your lover. You teach him everything there is to know about vampirism. Together, you concoct an ingenious scheme to return to the US so Max can claim the position Evan so desperately coveted, while you work as head of HR. You and Max turn everyone in Evan’s workplace into vampires while messing with him to make him question his sanity and watch him squirm in paranoia. (Maybe Amanda doesn’t exist so you go so far as to get close to Evan and act romantically interested in him.) This is so Max can land a devastating blow when he fucks you on Ted’s desk in front of him, stretching it out as he makes Evan watch before you both finally reveal you’re a vampire too and are actually the one who turned Max, not the other way around. Max loved the look on Evan’s face when he realized you’re not only in cahoots with each other, but in love. Sweet revenge for Evan getting him kicked out of school and blacklisted from most universities. Though Max admits that maybe he should be thanking Evan. In a way, it’s because of him that Max had to attend college in Romania and met you in the first place. So Evan sort of brought you two together.
#pedro pascal characters x reader#agent whiskey x reader#agent jack daniels x reader#jack daniels x reader#max lord x reader#maxwell lord x reader#din djarin x reader#javi g x reader#javi gutierrez x reader#max phillips x reader#fic ideas#random fic ideas#random prompts#pls tag me if you write any of these#i’d love to read it#pedro pascal character x reader#pedro pascal character fic#pedro pascal character fanfic#pedro pascal character fanfiction
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THE EIGHTH SENSE EP 5
First things first, Aeri and Jihyun bepeu time cleared my skin and my soul. Them going shopping? Eating sweets surrounded by plants and sunlight? I was giggling like mad. Every time Jihyun finds something new to enjoy I’m the happiest person ever, his smile is a cure is2g.
The profound difference between them spending quality fun time together (but Aeri pls stop testing the boy and let him eat HIS CAKE) and the seniors who would rather stare at their phone/laptop than actually talk tho? Yoonwon sitting with her back to the boys while Jaewon is on his phone? Like we’ve seen him and Yoonwon spend time together and not just next to each other but throw in Taehyung and suddenly everyone finds the screen more thrilling than…each other lol. When Yoonwon inflated that palm tree I burst out laughing.
Park Taehyung....can we talk about the dude for a sec? He is such a confusing character, I can’t put my finger on his objective. He is bitching about any and everything like he feels inferior to all living organisms. Yoonwon constantly keeps Taehyung in check (Guys with low self-esteem always say women need to get drafted too), warns him about his bullshit and polices him, but then he genuinely makes her laugh? I’M so confused. He was exempt from the military, which btw isn’t so easy, like what’s up with that? Dropping a comment like that can’t be unintentional. I’m also curious about how is it possible that their trio all started uni in the same year and now they are about to finish together? Jaewon served in the army, but Taehyung didn’t. What did he do for two years? He’s the TA but… what else?
When they were talking about looking for a job I got the feeling Taehyung started to boast about Jaewon’s background, getting loud and riling him up, as if to divert the attention from himself. He appeared to be blank/dazed before opening his mouth to show off about Jaewon again. He’s visibly unsure at times (hesitates or stutters). His overt attraction towards Bitna also seems ridiculously naive. Getting his ass served to him was well deserved. Aeri and Jihyun obliterating him is pure gold, followed by Yoonwon’s praises (Wise girl...you guys are smart) What I’m trying to say is that Taehyung can’t not realise that others treat him that way based on how he treats them. So what’s his deal? Sure, he is that bastard of a ‘friend’ (and a catalyst to Jaewon finally flipping out, and rest assured, he will publicly flip out) but Taehyung has to have a bigger part in the narrative than that. He is present and shown in a lot of scenes to only serve that much and yet it’s still unclear to me what his full purpose could be.
*the shade they give without a single word spoken*
The dynamic between Jaewon/Jihyun is constantly shifting with every instance where they learn something new about each other. One moment they are soft idiots (affectionate) falling in love and in the next moment, Jihyun is the only thing that can ground Jaewon while he’s on his way to the abyss.
Jaewon letting out his inner baby girl to confess (accompanied by a giggle) that he never before called Jihyun? Priceless!! That is the thrill and joy Jihyun can evoke from him, making him act like nothing his friends (one real, one of questionable origin) knew him to be. Because with Jihyun, every little thing, every first has a profound meaning that Jaewon doesn’t want to waste, he wants to make them special.
It was so painful to see him fall apart in the bar, I literally felt pain in my chest seeing him like that, trying to drink his ass to the grave with that build-up in music and the traffic won’t stop for you poster in the background.
I want to talk about this scene a bit further. First, I thought that the traffic won’t stop for you poster was to show that there’s no stopping Jaewon tonight but then I noticed the wall behind Jaewon. It has a chequered pattern, these tidy squares, either dark or light and at one point he leans back to them. Jaewon is feeling like his self and life are opposite ends, are absolutes: he’s either what he shows to the world or what he hides from the world, either what’s expected of him hence what he has to do or what he wants to do... Staring at those squares with definite borders while my mind replays Jaewon telling Jihyun don't try to get out of the box (or frame)... I’m feeling totally normal and fine atm.
Meanwhile, the traffic won’t stop for you can be linked to Jihyun and how, no matter the amount Jaewon tries to push him away, tries to make him pull away, it won’t stop him. Because if we look at them head-on, Jihyun is the one sitting in front of the traffic won’t stop for you poster and Jaewon is sitting in front of the chequered pattern.
In the bar, Jaewon shut down to breathe, to cope. He tried to run away so much he flat out dismissed the idea of Jihyun being able to distinguish the real him vs. what he shows others vs. the mess he was heading to at that moment. But that can’t stop Jihyun. His angry shot remains mood. (I’ve probably rewatched that scene at least fifteen times by now.) It’s not that he’s angry at Jaewon, more like he’s angry that he’s unable to do anything to help. And yet... taking Jaewon home, looking out for him, talking with him, offering to be there whenever he is in need… Jihyun’s thoughtful actions, his presence, him caring about Jaewon eventually puts Jaewon at ease, because it’s sincere and can be felt.
Jaewon pulls Jihyun close bc he is, even at that moment, having a fckin hard time and the way Jihyun just stands there, letting Jaewon hold him because he knows that’s what Jaewon needs? Oh and the ‘you can’t kiss me today’ line... stating that he’s not going to be a drunken mistake Jaewon can try to brush off the next day? Affirming that whatever they are is past that, has been past that since the first time Jaewon kissed him not out of being drunk but out of the desire to do so? *fist in mouth*
btw Oh Juntaek is insane! He acts with his eyes so well, conveying so much in his gaze I’m in awe (it’s his first gig y'all!!!!)
I don’t think ep6 is a dream sequence or a hallucination. For one, we can see Jaewon picking up Jihyun in ep5; he also wears the same sweatshirt he wore when waking up after getting sloshed the previous night. In addition, the therapy sessions are actually parts of one session all along. Jaewon and the therapist lady too, wear the same clothes throughout all the cuts we’ve seen so far. I didn’t see Jaewon wearing that outfit in any other scene so far (he wears something similar in ep5 but that feels off idk, it's just not the same?). This means we can’t pinpoint when that session happened, only that it had to happen after he became close to Jihyun. Thus, his ask for three weeks’ supply of meds can’t be an indicator. It’s unclear when that happened so it’s unclear how much of that supply of meds is still in Jaewon’s possession. I’ll talk about other signs that make me believe the trip to the beach is real in the next episode’s post
#여덟 번째 감각#the eighth sense#jihyunah youre doing amazing sweetie#힘들면 언제든 연락하고요 giving me the equivalent of 힘들면 내가 갈게#screams into the void#i swear korea is out to destroy me#whoops another behemoth of a post#ep rundown
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love affair - rafe cameron
a/n: it's not edited but i came up with this idea last night and fell in love w it so here goes nothing (also I see your requests and am working on those next!) let me know what you think pls! (not my gif). p.s sorry this is so long but i actually love it!
Summary: You and Rafe have been secretly dating for some time now, but everything gets turned upside down when your secret gets uncovered.
Warnings: swearing, smut, mentions of sex, mentions of drug abuse, relapse, and Topper being a dick !
Word Count: 7.6k+
my writing
The Cut had always been your side of the island. It's where you took your first steps, where you went to school, where you met all your friends, and it's where you fell in love for the very first time. You're a full-blooded Pogue, and you wouldn't change that for a damn thing.
You met Rafe Cameron over at Barry's about a year ago, where you had been with JJ buying weed. You watched the way he strutted up like he owned the place and then yelled 'What's up' to Barry to try and get his attention from you and JJ. You had rolled your eyes and Rafe had smirked, and the rest was history.
You'd been seeing him for about eight months now, secretly, anywhere. He usually comes onto the Cut when he wants to see you, but you never go anywhere public on the island together because Rafe doesn't want people to know the two of you are together. Which means, you usually end up eating dinner in his truck and having sex in the backseat afterward before he drops you off at John B's again.
You didn't care that Rafe wanted it to be a secret. You have fallen completely head-over-heels for him and all you ever want to do is be with him. Which is why, today, you seem a little depressed to your friends. It's nearly ten at night and you haven't heard a word from Rafe all day.
"Yo," JJ greets you, plopping down in the hammock beside you, "Wanna little?"
He reeks of weed, and holds out a blunt for you to take. At first, you want to say no, but then you shrug and take it from his fingers. JJ stares down at your hand as you take the blunt from him, loving the little bits of touch he gets from you every now and then.
"What's up?" he asks after you take a hit.
You shake your head, blowing smoke out into the open air, "Nothin'."
He doesn't believe you, and you know he doesn't. You just don't have the strength to fake it right now. You take another hit and notice JJ look over at you as you blow the smoke out again. His eyes move down from your face to your neck, spying what looks to be a bruise around your collarbone. And another at the hemline of your shirt. He leans down to get a better look, then reaches out and starts to move the collar of your shirt around.
"What the fuck, JJ?" you swat him away, listening to him break out in a laugh.
"Holy shit, Y/N," he stares at you, eyes wide, "Did you get attacked by someone's mouth lately?"
You swallow and hold the blunt up to your lips to try and hide your expression as you remember how Rafe had snuck you upstairs to his bedroom two nights ago and could not keep his hands off you for anything. He had kissed on every square inch of your body, telling you that if he couldn't claim you in public, he sure as hell would do it in private. You can't even think about sex with Rafe when you're with your friends, because it just has you grinning like an idiot and then you start to crave it.
"Mind your business, JJ," is all you decide to say, taking one last hit of the blunt before giving it back to him.
"Who was it?" he laughs.
You know he won't let this go, so you turn and walk away, trying to get up to the house where the rest of the group is. You shake your head when you hear his boots hit the ground and he tries to stand up, trying not to laugh when you hear him say 'woah' and try to steady himself.
"Come on, now," JJ yells after you, "Don't be like that!"
You walk up the stairs on the porch and turn around to flip him off, then slip inside once you see him take off running at you.
"Got sick of the skeeters already?" John B asks you as you collapse down on the couch beside Pope. Kie is standing in the kitchen getting beer, silently holding you up to ask if you want one. You nod, then look back to John B.
"Got sick of JJ already," you correct.
"Most people do, within the hour," Pope informs you, making you laugh.
You hear JJ rush through the porch and shut your eyes, praying he doesn't come in here acting like a fool because he saw a few hickeys on you. Kiara enters the living room just as JJ enters through the front door, wide smirk on his face.
"All right, listen up," JJ announces to the room.
You roll your eyes as Kie hands you your beer. JJ glances down at you, smirk only growing on his lips.
"I wanna know who marked up our girl," JJ declares, pointing down at you from above your head so that you won't see his motion, but they all will.
"What are you talking about, JJ?" Kie asks, huffing.
"I'm so glad you asked, Kie," JJ grins, then points down to the hickey on your collarbone, "Exhibit A, ladies and gentlemen. And Pope."
Pope gives JJ a glare, but JJ doesn't see it. He pulls down your shirt again, just slightly, to show off the other two.
"Exhibit B," he says, pointing to the one just above your breast, "And the third one," he points to the one resting in between your breasts.
"It would be Exhibit C," Pope corrects.
"We all know you're a nerd, Pope," JJ waves him off, "So, I just have to ask. Boys, either of you know anything about this?"
"JJ-" John B starts, but JJ interrupts him by holding a finger up.
"Admission of guilt is punishable by death," JJ informs them, then points at John B to continue.
"We know nothing about it," Pope speaks, loudly, ready for this conversation to be over.
"Good to know," JJ says, "Now, my prime suspect. Kie, my lovely lady. You didn't, perhaps, make these markings?"
JJ points back down to your chest again, watching both you and Kiara drop your jaws.
"No, what the hell, JJ?" Kiara groans.
"Seriously?" you ask him, finally looking up at him.
"What?" JJ asks innocently, "Certainly something I like picturing in my brain."
"You're disgusting, JJ," Kie grumbles, taking a long sip of her beer.
"Can you let it go now, please?" John B asks JJ, pointing to you as a reference of what he's talking about.
You feel your phone vibrate in your back pocket and pull it out, noticing it's a text from Rafe. You keep his number under the name of an old boss you used to have at your job, so if anyone were to look at your incoming texts before you could, that's all they would see. Rafe keeps your number under a different girl's name, which you hate, but understand.
Meet me at the Druthers in half hour. Can't wait to see you.
You smile softly at the text and then tuck your phone away again before anyone can notice. You watch JJ and John B argue with one another about JJ's so called 'investigation', and Kie rolls her eyes every now and then. Pope has closed his eyes and is trying to drift off. You take a few big gulps of you beer and finish it, then set the empty bottle down on the coffee table.
"I'm just saying, brother, you're hindering this process by not answering my questions on where you were yesterday," JJ says to John B, who looks so frustrated he could scream.
"All right, boys," you announce as you stand, "I gotta take off. Early morning at work tomorrow."
JJ frowns, "Early morning serving Kooks! Nah, sit down. I haven't solved the case yet."
You take a step closer to JJ and stare into his eyes, ready to totally fuck with him.
"You really wanna know who is was, JJ?" you ask.
The smell of weed and your vanilla perfume fills his nose, making him feel even more intoxicated than he already is. He can feel himself melting already, and he wants to know who did it so he can beat the daylights out of them.
"Yes," he replies, trying his best to keep his voice even.
You lean in very close to him, your lips only inches apart, and you swear you can hear his heart pounding. You can't see them, but you can tell the other three can't tear their eyes away.
"Your mother," you whisper against his lips, watching as he sighs and steps away from you.
You hear John B crack up as you smirk, then start toward the porch.
"Fuck off, all right?" JJ calls after you, "I'm going to close this case!"
"Whatever you say, JJ,'" you reply, then rush off the porch steps and out into the night.
You had to sneak around to the back of the Cameron's property, afraid someone in the house might see you. Luckily, you and Rafe have carved out a path and tested it many times to make sure it's not visible from the house. You're most exposed on the dock, but you figure the darkness should at least help.
You can see some lights on the boat, but you don't see Rafe right away. You reach the side of the boat and look around, wondering if he's on the boat or went back to the house. You're hesitant to climb on, given that it's his family boat and anyone could be there.
"You're late," you hear, and you glance up to the top deck to find him, grinning down at you.
"Sorry, I had trouble getting away," you reply as he starts down to get you.
"Those Pogues never want to let you leave, is that it?" he asks you once he climbs down, coming to stand directly in front of you.
"Well, one of them caught sight of these," you pull your shirt down, exposing Rafe's work, "So it got a little complicated."
Rafe smirks at what he's done to you, how he's marked you. He brings his hand up and traces his finger over the mark on your collarbone, stroking your skin softly.
"They have to know you're spoken for," he says softly.
You could melt under his touch, you really believe that. His skin just belongs on yours.
"We could just tell them," you volunteer.
Rafe snickers and then removes his hand, bringing it down to yours. He doesn't respond to your comment.
"Come aboard, m'lady," he announces in a cheesy accent, helping you on.
"All right," you say once your feet are firmly in the boat, "What are we doing here?"
"Well," Rafe sighs, taking your hand and leading you down into the boat, "I couldn't sneak you into the house tonight, and this place has a bed and a bathtub, so I figured, what the hell? Let's spend the night on the boat."
He leads you toward the bedroom, which was usually the one his parents used. It wasn't very large, but it was definitely enough for the two of you.
"A bathtub?" you repeat to him as he pulls you in.
He nods and then opens up the bathroom door, exposing his handy work. He's filled up the tub with hot water and bubbles, and set out champagne for the two of you. You grin as you look back to him, watching the shy smile on his face grow.
"Is it, like, an anniversary or something?" you ask, gawking at what he's set up for you.
"No, I don't think so," he laughs, "I just feel like being close to you."
You turn around and collapse into him, loving the feeling you get when he wraps his arms around you. It makes you feel safe and protected, like nothing bad could ever happen to you as long as he was with you.
"Want to get in?" he asks softly against your head, and you nod.
He pulls his head back to look at you, and you observe how tired his eyes look. He's been clean for a month now, but you can tell it gets to him every now and again. He craves it, needs it, wants it more than anything. Which you understand, because it's exactly how you feel about him.
Without breaking eye contact with you, he pulls your shirt over your head from the bottom, then brings his hands down to undo the button on your shorts. They fall to the ground and you step out of them as Rafe brings his head down to kiss your chest. He brings his hands around your body and undoes your bra, letting it fall to the floor too.
He kisses down your chest and your stomach, the kisses wet and quick. You bring your hands to his hair, playing with it as he continues to kiss you. He stops once he reaches your underwear, smirking up at you as he loops his fingers through either side and takes his sweet time sliding them down your legs. He leaves a kiss on both of your thighs, then stands back up and kisses your lips again.
You can't get him to stop, nor do you want him to, as he pulls his own shirt over his head, only breaking your kiss for a second. Your hand goes to his shorts and you slide them off, finding he's not wearing underwear. You laugh against his lips.
He brings you over to the tub and takes your hand, helping you in. He climbs in after you and immediately pulls you onto his lap, bringing his lips to your neck. You moan softly, only pressing him to continue. Your hands find his hair again, then come down to stroke his back.
He kisses on you for a while, your lips, your neck, your chest, anywhere. After a bit, he pulls back and just stares at you, pulling his hand out of the water every now and then to play with your hair. That gets it wet, but you don't care. This moment quickly becomes one of your favorites.
"How are you feeling?" you ask him, bringing a bubbly hand up to stroke his cheek.
"Could be better," he admits after a minute, "I just needed to see you."
You nod, fixing the hair that's starting to hang in his eyes.
"You were thinking about it," you state, figuring out why he texted you to meet him so soon.
He will usually give you a heads-up, tell you in the morning he wants to see you at night. His 'half an hour' text was unusual. He nods his head, not wanting to admit to you that he was thinking about relapsing.
"I don't like feeling like this," he admits.
You stare at him, knowing that if any of the guys at the club, or any of your friends, saw Rafe like this, he most definitely would not get the same respect he does from them. The show he puts on for everyone else, the tough guy who acts emotionless, is so fake that you can't help but laugh when you see him around the island. It's just so not who he really is.
"I know, baby," you whisper back.
Your hand cups his cheek, thumb brushing over his skin. He brings his hand up and takes yours, then reaches over and swipes bubbles onto your nose. This makes him smile, which in turn makes you smile.
"Hey," you pout, then take your free hand and reach to do the same, but he's too quick for you.
You giggle, trying to get to him, and he laughs loudly when you can't.
"Okay, okay, truce," he yells, still laughing, grabbing both of your wrists and holding them down so you can't get him.
"Only because you're cute," you agree.
"Hmm, I'll show you cute," he smirks, then leans down and kisses you, but it's rougher this time.
You know exactly what he wants.
You have sex with Rafe in the tub, then again on the bed, and neither of you bother getting dressed. Afterward, you had gone into the bathroom to fix yourself up, and when you come back out, Rafe is reading as he lays in bed and waits for you.
When you emerge, he closes his book and looks up at you. How perfect you are, how much he loves you, and how large of a hickey he put on the sweet spot of your neck, visible enough for anyone on the island to see.
"What are you reading?" you ask him, crawling into the bed beside him. He opens his arm up and allows your head to fall down to his chest, then leaves his hand to rest on your back.
"East of Eden," he says, holding up the book as proof.
"You don't have to stop," you say, giving his chest a small kiss.
Rafe grins and opens the book back up with one hand, then quietly starts reading it out loud. You listen as he speaks, breathing in his scent along with the story. His voice is so calm, so soothing, and you can feel his chest vibrate slightly against your temple as he reads. It doesn't take long for you to fall asleep, because you know this is what heaven feels like.
Rafe wakes you early the next morning, knowing you have to get to work. Thankfully, you work on Figure Eight, but that was only because of Rafe. He had gotten you a job at the club after learning how much you made on the Cut with your last job. Plus, with you at the club, he knows he'll get to see you more often.
He brings you your bag, which contains your uniform for work along with an extra pair of underwear and fresh bra. You ask him to get your clothes from the bathroom, and he tells you he washed them last night after you had fallen asleep, then goes to get them from the dryer.
He hands you a stack of clothes after you get dressed, and you don't bother checking that you have everything. You just shove it in your bag and then throw your hair up in a ponytail. Rafe comes up behind you in the bathroom mirror and kisses your neck, then your cheek.
You turn around and give him a proper kiss, which makes him happy. He groans against your lips after a minute.
"I don't want to make you late," he says as he pulls away, "Get your stuff, I'll drive you."
You nod and then exit the bathroom, grabbing your bag from the bedroom and then watching as Rafe slides his shorts back on. He steps over and picks his shirt up off the floor, tossing it over his head even though its inside out.
You laugh at him and he smiles back, then takes your hand and leads you off the boat. He knows his parents have already left for work and his sisters don't get up until noon, so he holds your hand all the way down the dock. It's the most public place that he had ever shown affection toward you, and you love it.
You two walk around the house and Rafe leads you to the passenger door of his truck, holding it open for you. He gives you a sweet kiss before he gently closes the door, then rushes around and gets in the drivers seat.
He holds your hand all the way to the club, occasionally bringing it up to his lips to kiss. You watch his motion, convinced you will never love someone like this again. He pulls into the parking lot of the club, parking further back because he knows some people inside might recognize his truck. The early morning golfers have already started to arrive.
"Top and I are playing golf in about an hour, so we'll be around for lunch," he tells you.
His eyes look sad, like he doesn't want you to get out of the truck. You wrap his hand up in two of yours, trying to comfort him.
"I can't wait," you smile at him.
"I'm gonna try to request your section, but I'm not sure how it'll work out. You know, with Topper listening and all."
You nod your head, then reach up and stroke his cheek. You just love how soft his skin is, you can't seem to get enough. He relaxes under your touch, letting his eyes close.
"I'll see you later," you tell him, not wanting to leave him, either.
He leans over and gives you a kiss, one you never want to pull away from.
"I love you," he whispers against your lips once he pulls away.
"I love you, too," you say, then give him a smile.
He smiles back, but it fades once you reach for the door handle. You hop out, and with one last, longing look to your boyfriend, you close the door and walk up to the club.
The breakfast rush isn't too bad, nothing compared to when the lunch rush starts. Apparently, every single man on the island is playing golf today, and they're all hungry. You barely even notice when Rafe, Topper and Kelce sit down at a table, one that just so happens to be in your section. Rafe sees you first, watching as you hurry around to different tables, talk to different people, and even laugh with a few of the guests. He wishes he could do that with you the way they could.
The three boys sit there for about five minutes before Topper makes some remark about nobody coming to the table yet.
"Shut up, dude, they're busy," Rafe replies.
Topper and Kelce both look over at Rafe, giving him a 'what did you just say?' glance. Rafe coughs awkwardly and shakes his head, brushing them off.
"Afternoon, boys," you greet them, knowing better than to look directly at Rafe.
You two have perfected the routine. No secret glances, no lingering stares, nothing to make anyone suspicious.
"Water," Topper points to the glass.
You plaster a smile on your face, even though you really could hit him. You lean forward to fill up his glass, Topper only glances up for a second when he spies the large hickey on your neck.
"What, they don't pay you enough here?" he asks you, pointing to his neck as if to ask you about your own.
You stare down at him, completely unsure of how you wish to handle it, so Rafe speaks up instead.
"I'll take a rum and coke," he says quickly, glancing at you only for a second before he looks back down at his phone.
"Yes, sir," you say quietly.
Kelce orders the same as Rafe, and you walk away with murder in your mind. Topper is such an asshole, always has been, and you've never wanted so badly to tell him that the creator of that hickey is sitting two feet away from him.
You go inside to the bar and slide the drink orders in, just as something out the window catches your eye. JJ's standing outside, waving his arms like a mad man at you. You grin, walking back outside to talk to him.
All of your tables, including Rafe's, can see you approach JJ. But you don't care. You love when he comes to see you at work. He's a familiar face amongst a sea of rich folk.
"Hey," you greet him, a big smile on your face.
"Please tell me you're not busy after work," he says quickly, "Kie's grounded, Pope's studying, and John B's off in La La Land with Sarah Cameron again."
You try your best to ignore the part where JJ brings up John B and Sarah Cameron. They've started hanging out recently, and the friends give absolutely no shit to John B about it. Yet, you know if you told them you were seeing Rafe, all of their heads would explode.
"I'm not busy," you tell him.
"Good. Blunts by the beach?" he raises his eyebrow, both of your favorite activity to do together.
You nod, then give him a smile.
"Bless you, sweetheart," he throws his arms around you, pulling you in for a bear hug.
"JJ-" you try, but he squeezes you even tighter, "I have to get back to work."
JJ sets you down, rolling his eyes as he adjusts his Kildare Island snapback.
"Ah, yes, back to the chains of capitalism. Go, move along, serve these hardworking folks!" he raises his voice as he speaks, making you shake your head.
You start to back away from him, knowing you need to get back to your tables. Your manager comes up behind JJ and taps him on the shoulder.
"Yes, in fact, brother. I am a member here," you hear JJ say.
You turn around and start walking away, and then you hear a, "Okay, you got it, boss. I'm out of here."
You laugh slightly, then go back inside to the bar and grab the drinks for Rafe and Kelce. When you get back outside to their table, you notice how Rafe's jaw is clenched and he doesn't even steal a glance at you as you set his drink down in front of him.
"You all know what you want?" you ask, looking to Kelce first.
Kelce tells you, and with a polite smile, he hands over his menu. Topper goes next, practically barking out his food order, then hands Kelce his menu to hand to you. Much to your surprise, Kelce rolls his eyes at Topper, allowing you to see, then smirks at you. You smile in return, then look over to Rafe.
"For you, sir?" you ask.
Rafe is staring straight ahead, but his eyes flicker over to you when you speak. He snaps his menu shut and holds it up for you to take.
"Not hungry," he mutters.
You swallow as you take the menu from him, wanting to remind him that he hadn't eaten this morning, and is now drinking alcohol, and needs to put food in his stomach. But, instead, you bite your tongue and take his menu, then quietly tell Topper and Kelce their food will be out shortly.
After a few minutes, you finally get a break in the lunch rush and step inside to cool down. Rafe notices this and excuses himself from the boys to go to the bathroom, then steps inside the clubhouse. You glance up from the hostess stand to see him nod his head at the hallway where the bathrooms are, so you step out and follow him.
Once you turn down the hall, Rafe is waiting for you right by the men's room. He's pulled the door open to check if anyone is inside, and when he's confident the coast is clear, he grabs your wrist and pulls you in with him.
"What's going on?" you ask him, yanking your wrist from his harsh grip.
"JJ's coming to see you at work now?" Rafe snaps, running his hand through his hair.
"He's my friend," you defend him, making Rafe scoff.
"That piece of garbage isn't friends with anything that has a vagina," he laughs, but it's sarcastic.
"Okay, why are you being an asshole right now?" your voice gets loud, so he brings his hand up to silence you.
"I just don't like it when he puts his hands on you," Rafe whispers.
"Well, at least someone does in public," you snap, watching his chest fall.
He doesn't say anything right away, so you know you've upset him. You sigh and set your hands on your hips, then look back up at him.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that," you say, "I'm just a little frustrated. Topper's a real asshole."
Rafe nods his head, reaching out and pulling you into him. You accept his hug, letting him make you feel safe.
"I'm sorry, baby," he says quietly.
"It's not your fault," you remind him, then pick your head up from his chest, "I have to get back to work."
Rafe nods and releases his arms from around you. you reach for the door handle, then turn back around to him.
"By the way," you say, watching his eyes meet yours, "I put in an order for you, anyway. You shouldn't drink on an empty stomach."
Rafe smiles softly at you and then nods. You poke your head out of the door just enough, then carefully slide out of the bathroom. You close the door behind you and rush away, knowing Rafe will wait a few minutes before coming out.
Their food comes out a few minutes later, so you grab the three plates and carry them outside. You had ordered Rafe his usual - burger, medium well, and fries. He got it almost every time. Topper and Kelce look confused as hell when you set down Rafe's usual order in front of him after he had ordered nothing.
"Thank you," Rafe says quietly, without even realizing anything.
"Anything else I can get you boys?" you ask, looking to Kelce, who seems to be your safest bet at the table.
"Nah," he shakes his head.
Topper doesn't speak and neither does Rafe, so you walk away. Kelce smirks and looks to the boys.
"Yo, I think that waitress has got a thing for me," he grins.
Rafe laughs, louder than he means to, earning both the boys' attention.
"What?" Rafe asks, picking up his burger, "She's a Pogue, bro."
He adds the last part just to cover his own ass, which seems to work, because Topper shrugs.
"She's still hot," Kelce mutters, making Rafe stop form taking a bite of his food. Before he can say anything in return, Topper speaks up.
"Hey, man, I thought you told her you didn't want anything," Topper looks at him, his stare almost accusing.
"I ordered when I went in to pee," Rafe says, a little too quickly.
"And it came out that fast?" Topper questions, eyebrow raised.
Rafe just shrugs, "I told the Pogue to put a rush on it."
Topper grins, completely accepting Rafe's story. The boys eat quickly, and when they're through, you bring over the tab they have to sign. Kelce passes the booklet around the table, it ending with Rafe.
"Let's roll, boys," Rafe announces after he signs.
The boys stand up, ready to walk out, when Rafe tells them he forgot his phone at the table and would catch up. They go on, not looking back as Rafe rushes back to the table and opens the booklet again. Pulling out his wallet, he slides a one-hundred into it as a tip, then pulls out his copy of his receipt, scribbling on it, then closing it again.
You see him just as he closes the booklet and then walks away, not looking around for you. So, you step over to the table and grab it, your eyes going wide as you see the bill inside. You want to chase after him, make him take it back, but you know you can't. Then, you see the writing on his receipt.
I'm sorry. I love you.
You feel your heart ache in your chest, quickly pocketing the bill and the little note. You bite your lip to hide a smile, then check on the rest of your tables with a bit more enthusiasm than you've held the entire shift.
You meet JJ on the beach after work and smoke, hanging out and talking about your job. You vent about how much of a tool Topper is, to which JJ agrees. You even told him about your big tip, but you gave the credit to an older guy who probably messed up the bills when he removed them from his wallet. JJ was so shocked - he asked if you could get him a job there. You said you'd try, remembering the only reason you had your job was because of Rafe.
Once it gets dark, you and JJ head back to John B's. He isn't there when you arrive, which causes JJ to joke about how he's too busy macking on Sarah Cameron to come home. You laugh lightly, but really, you wish you were with Rafe. You decide to text him, just to make sure he's still doing okay.
How are you feeling?
You type and hit send quickly, before JJ even notices you're on your phone. You and JJ collapse on the couch and continue to talk, ignoring JJ when he points to the new hickey on your neck. He watches your expression change and assumes you don't want to talk about it, so he drops it.
You text goes unanswered for a while. Long enough that you start to worry. You sit up, glancing at your phone every few seconds, convinced every time that you feel it vibrate. It never does.
JJ starts to doze off, and when you hear a knock at the door, you're not surprised when he doesn't move. You get up, careful not to wake him, and then step out on the porch. You assume it's probably Pope finally coming to join, but when you glance up, your heart stops when you see Rafe through the screen.
You rush out and close the door behind you, staring at him. He looks like a mess, his hair is standing up in all different directions and he's biting his nails as he tries to keep himself calm.
"What are you doing here?" you whisper to him.
"Baby," he says, his voice weak, "Holy shit, baby, I fucked up."
He starts to pace, reaching his hand up to bite his nails again. Your heart sinks into your stomach as you stare at him.
"Rafe," you say, keeping your voice calm, "Did you relapse?"
He stops, head snapping over to you and looking at you like you're crazy.
"What?" he gasps, "No. What the fuck, no."
You shake your head, confused as to what he's talking about if not that. You reach out and grab onto his hands, pulling his fingers away from his mouth so he stops biting his nails.
"Then what happened?" you ask.
He stares at you and sighs, then grabs your hands in his, "Sarah was on the boat this afternoon."
He states this and stops, as if you should be able to figure it all out from there. You stare at him, waiting for him to continue. When he doesn't, you shake your head.
"And?"
Rafe groans, as if you should already know, "And, when I picked up your clothes off the bathroom floor this morning, I sorta, kinda, missed your underwear. Sarah found them and brought them in the house, she started yelling at me for bringing random girls on the boat and told me it was disgusting and..." he trails off, then starts again, "And I snapped. I told her that it wasn't random girls, it was one girl, and then she asked who, and I didn't answer, so she started yelling for my dad, and then I told her that it was you. I had to shut her up, babe, my dad would kick my ass-"
"Rafe," you stop him, squeezing his hands, "Stop. Just calm down, all right?"
Rafe takes a deep breath, watching you and trying to calm himself down to your level.
"Was John B with your sister when she confronted you?" you ask him, still keeping your voice calm for his sake.
"What?" Rafe questions, "No. Why would John B be with Sarah?"
You look up at him, realizing Rafe has no idea that Sarah and John B are together. You look at him until he slowly figures it out, then reaches up and grabs his temples.
"They're together?" Rafe says, shocked, "She can't be with him!"
You make a face, "Why not?"
"Because he's a fucking Pogue," Rafe snaps, then immediately realizes what he's said.
His eyes travel over to you and he quickly shakes his head, then wraps his arms around you before you can run off. You aren't sure what to say or do, so you just stand in his arms. He tries not to be bothered when you don't return his embrace.
"I didn't mean that," he says quickly, "I didn't. I love you. I'm sorry."
You swallow your feelings and move your face into his chest. You keep your arms by your side, but your little movement soothes him enough. His words circle around in your head, and after a minute, you move away from him. If all you're ever going to be to him is a Pogue, you're not sure being with him is the right choice. He looks hurt when you move away, but you try to shake it off.
"So, everyone knows Sarah's with John B?" he asks you.
"Yeah," you reply.
He runs his hand through his hair, pulling it back from his face.
"So why have we been hiding out?"
You back away even further, turning and grabbing the screen door. You pull it open, then turn back and give Rafe a small, sympathetic smile.
"I wasn't the one who wanted to keep us a secret, Rafe."
You watch him just for a moment as his expression changes, realizing that every boundary, every rule, has been created by him. He made up every sneaky mission, every path the two of you would take, and you just went along with it because you enjoyed being with him. His heart sinks as he watches you walk back into the house, shutting the porch light off behind you.
John B wakes you and JJ the next morning, coming in the house and finding you both asleep with JJ's arm around you. You sit up and rub your eyes, moving out from JJ's grip. He rolls over on the couch and goes back to sleep, while John B nods his head for you to follow him into the kitchen.
You're still groggy from last night, it all coming back to you as you enter the kitchen. Rafe's last look at you before you had come back inside rushes through your head, and you do your best to wipe it away.
"So," John B looks down at you, observing the hickey on your neck for just a second before he continues speaking, "I think I solved JJ's case."
You look up at him, remembering what Rafe had said about telling Sarah. Now, as you look up at your friend, you know he knows.
"She told you," you state. You don't ask him, you don't need to.
He nods his head, "Why didn't you tell us?"
You sigh and sit down at the table near him, glancing quickly to make sure JJ's still passed out. It's always easier to talk and be honest with John B when JJ's not around to make some comment or joke. And you know JJ would call Rafe and asshole and try to talk you out of it.
"Rafe didn't want me to," you answer honestly, not liking those words.
"Because of who you are?" he asks, trying his best to not sound too judgmental.
John B doesn't like Rafe even in the slightest, but he trusts your judgment and wants to know the full truth on what's going on between the two of you.
"I don't know," you look down, even though you're sure that's the truth.
"How long have you been seeing him?"
You look up to him, biting the inside of your cheek as you hesitate to respond. John B can tell just by your behavior that he isn't going to like the answer.
"Eight months."
John B swears under his breath and turns away from you, running a hand over his head as he processes.
"I can't believe you thought you had to keep that from us. And I can't believe the whole time I've been running my mouth about Sarah," he groans, like he's frustrated with himself because you didn't tell him.
"John B, it's okay," you stand now, setting your hand on his arm, "You didn't know."
He looks up at you, his eyes gentler.
"You love him?"
You nod, only slightly, when he pulls you in for a hug. You hug him back, trying not to cry, because you have no idea where you stand with Rafe. You pull away first, shielding your face so he can't see the way your eyes are filled with tears.
You tell him you have to get ready for work, you're on for lunch and dinner today, and then excuse yourself to go take a shower. You take your sweet time, and all of John B's hot water, then get dressed. JJ is still asleep when you leave, so you say a quick goodbye to John B ans make your way over to Figure Eight.
You think about texting him, but decide against it. If he wants to fix things, he's going to have to handle it himself. You tell yourself to put it out of your head for your whole shift and just focus on your work, that you can handle your personal life on your own time.
You clock in and immediately start busting your ass, making sure every one of your tables has everything they need. The lunch rush slows, enough that you can hang out and chat with the bartender before the dinner rush begins.
The dinner rush today is like nothing you've ever experienced before. Just as busy as yesterday, but larger parties. Plus you're down a waiter. The whole process just stresses you out more than it did yesterday. You're rushing around the outside deck, trying to remember all of your drink orders, when he catches your eye. Rafe's sitting at a table with Topper and Kelce, watching you. You try not to be upset that he's not in your section, but you look away from him and walk inside instead.
You bring drinks out a few minutes later, finding JJ standing on the deck again, chatting up another waitress.
"What are you doing here?" you ask as you pass him.
He nods to the girl as a way of excusing himself, then follows you to your table as you deliver the tray of drinks.
"Came to see if you wanted to help me break Kie out of her house arrest," he grins.
You look up at him, your stressed expression getting his attention. You walk away and set the tray down on a rack outside, JJ still following you.
"I'm really busy right now, JJ. I can't."
He frowns, getting annoyed that you won't even look at him.
"What about later? Also, do you know what's up with John B? He was acting all quiet this morning when I asked where you had run off to. Did you guys get into it or something?"
"Oh, my God, JJ-" you groan and spin around, but you get cut off by a loud voice you recognize all too well.
"Excuse me, everyone," Rafe speaks, his voice carrying to almost the entire deck.
You turn around and find him standing up at his table, Topper and Kelce both looking confused as hell.
"I have an announcement to make," his eyes move over to yours, and Topper notices this, "I am in love."
You cross your arms over your chest and look at him, daring him to do it. JJ scoffs as he stands behind you, having not a single clue what's going on.
"Who in their right mind would love him?" JJ laughs.
"Rafe, sit down, man, are you high?" Topper snaps, fearing what Rafe is about to say.
Rafe brings his hand up and points over to you, watching as you bring your hand up to your mouth in astonishment.
"That's her. Right there, that pretty waitress. I'm completely and totally in love with her. And I'm sorry that I haven't admitted that sooner."
You grin at him, letting out a laugh as he steps out from behind the table. You forget about JJ and Topper and Kelce, it seems to be just the two of you. He walks over to you and grabs the back of your neck, pulling you up to him for a kiss. You hear a few people cheer and clap, but nothing crazy. When Rafe pulls away, you smile, and mouth 'i love you' to him.
"So this means you're not into me?" Kelce asks with a grin.
"Sorry," you shrug, leaning your head on Rafe's chest.
"Damn, that's why Rafe found it so funny," he mutters to himself.
Topper doesn't speak, he just gets up from the table and walks into the clubhouse, clearly embarrassed and angry at Rafe. You turn to find JJ, standing behind you with his mouth open.
"So, it's Rafe's handiwork on your neck, then?" he asks, still stunned.
You nod sheepishly, feeling Rafe lean down to kiss your temple.
"Shit," JJ mutters, "I'm gonna go smoke a blunt and process this brand new information."
You shake your head, promising to catch up with him later. He just nods and walks off, his expression never changing from how stunned he is.
"I can't believe you did that," you turn to your boyfriend. He grins down at you.
"I should've done it eight months ago. I'm sorry I let it get this far," he brings his hand up to your cheek.
You love the feeling of his skin on yours. Most days, you wish you could crawl into his skin. But even then, it wouldn't be close enough for either of you.
"It's okay," you smile, "I should get back to work."
He nods, giving you one more quick kiss on the lips.
"Meet you after?" he asks against your lips. You can still taste him.
"Yes, please."
#drew starkey#rafe x reader#rafe cameron imagine#rafe x y/n#rafe imagine#rafe fanfiction#rafe outer banks#rafe obx#rafe cameron#rafe#rafe fic#outer banks netflix#outerbanks netflix#outer banks#outerbanks
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This might be kinda specific…. I thought of the whole thing but you’re the only one who can do it justice, your soft daddy!bucky x reader is the most precious thing ever 🥺💜💜
This is just fluff. Reader & bucky having breakfast, he made her favourite cinnamon french toast & is letting her eat by herself like a big girl while he reads the newspaper & eats his own breakfast. And while he’s reading, he scrunches his face like this (including references):
And reader hasn’t ever told him before but she LOVES when he does this (because he does it quite often without realising).
So she’s giggling with a mouthful of food & he’s amused & asks her what’s so funny. (she’s gonna finish chewing before she answers coz she’s a good girl 😌)
Maybe she points to his face & says “you’re pretty” & when he laughs she uses her fingers to scrunch his face again & tell him “like this”…maybe drags him by his hand to the mirror and shows him what she means by scrunching her own face & they’re both giggling & lots of bunny kisses & bucky realising how many of his quirks she picks up on & loving her even more for it 🥺🌟
I’m sorry how this sounds but it had kind of already spiralled in my head before I realised I needed you to write it 🥺🥺 Pls take your time & switch around anything you need to…the main request is just reader showing him how much she loves it when he scrunches his face.
& If you wanna do more than just fluff I would happily understand 😏🥺
Pairing: Daddy!Bucky Barnes x f!little!reader
Word Count: 1,670
Warnings: ddlg dynamics, fluff and then more fluff (i went for the arm when i wasn't asked to)
A/N: Aqua love, thank you thank you thank you for sharing this perfect idea with me; this is the best, cutest and loveliest thot anyone's ever blessed me with🥺💜💜 I loved every second of writing this and I hope it's close to what you were thinking and that I didn't disappoint you I'm so nervous I'm gonna scream. I love you💜 Please enjoy xx💜
~~
daddy's pretty
Bucky smiled fondly at his sweet girl when she brought the fork to her mouth once again. She was eating by herself today. Daddy let her after she’d reassured him she was a capable, big girl. It helped that Bucky made what he called cinnamon French toast nuggies, where he cuts up the toast in smaller cubes instead of serving her the whole thing to work through by herself. Bucky was too cautious to have her deal with a knife.
She looked so cute trying to keep the cinnamon sugar-dusted toast square on the fork as she enjoyed the tasty French toast Daddy had made her.
He took a sip of his coffee, turning his stare back to the newspaper in hand. Bucky was focused on the words he was reading when he heard a sweet muffled giggle.
Amused at the sudden sound, Bucky flipped the paper away from his face and asked with a grin, “What?”
He awaited her answer as his thumb wiped maple syrup from underneath her lip. Bucky didn't realize, but he'd scrunched his nose again when he was cleaning the sticky syrup off her skin and she giggled again with a mouthful of toast while he licked his thumb.
“What's so funny?” He laughed too.
She continued chewing her food, wanting to swallow before answering Daddy because she was a polite, well-mannered baby doll.
“You're so pretty.” She grinned lovingly, pointing to Bucky’s face as she tilted her head.
It took him by surprise and he might've even blushed a little at the compliment. Pretty wasn’t a word Bucky was used to being called.
“Yeah?” Bucky chuckled and she nodded.
“Mmm, like a bunny.”
“Like a bunny?”
“Like dis,” her hands went to touch his face but Bucky stopped her.
“Woah woah, where do you think you're going with those hands?” Bucky chuckled, holding her wrists.
“Gonna show you, dada.” She made grabby hands at his face.
“Right, but what do we have to do first before touching?”
She thought for a short second, “wash our hands?”
“That's right, doll.” Bucky kissed her cinnamon-stained fingers.
“Because I ate by myself because I'm a big girl.” She nodded confidently, making him smile bigger.
“Exactly! Such a smart little baby.” Bucky ruffled her hair as he got up to take his mug to the sink and she giggled shyly before running to the bathroom to get cleaned up.
~
After she’d washed her hands and Bucky had cleared the table, she insisted on dragging him before the large mirror in the bedroom so she could show him exactly what she was talking about.
Bucky took a seat on the floor with her on his lap and tenderly kissed her cheek, “so you think daddy's pretty?” his thumb and index held her chin.
“Yes, dada's so so pretty!” She affirmed, “like dis.” She placed her index and middle by the wrinkles at the end of Bucky's eyes and her thumbs at his jawline, “liiiike dis,” She whispered to herself as she brought her fingers closer, squeezing Bucky's face to try and mimic the face scrunch he does. She was focused, biting on her lower lip as she tried her best to recreate the face scrunch.
Bucky remained quiet for a second, admiring her while she played with his face before playfully turning to the side and roaring, pretending to bite at her fingers.
She squealed, quickly removing her fingers and cradling them in her other palm, “dada!”
“Sorry, doll, you're too delicious I couldn't help it. What was that?” He kissed her nose, his palms rubbing circles on her back.
“Dada, I was tryna show you how you're pretty like a bunny!” She whined, biting a smile, deeply blushing at Bucky's words. She was so adorable.
“Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Show me now,” he said, raising his hands up in defense with a smile.
Bucky slipped his hair behind his ears and she cupped one cheek again, testing the waters.
“Your hand is too cold!” He faked a hiss and she removed her touch.
“Quick, we need a kiss to the cheek to warm it up!” He told her seriously and she laughed.
“Hey! A kiss, stat! We're losing the cheek.” Bucky shook her by the shoulders. She giggled even more before pecking his cheek.
“What was that?” he nearly pouted.
“Kiss.”
“That was too tiny it doesn't help! Doll, gimme a real kiss.” Bucky held her closer, hands on her back as he offered her his cheek.
She smiled big and smooched his cheek in a loud kiss, making herself giggle.
“And one more,” he asked and she pressed three little kisses instead, enjoying the way Daddy’s stubble tickled her soft lips.
“Good girl.” Bucky went to smooch her cheek as well but she pulled away after the second kiss.
“Dada, lemme show you!” She dragged her words out as she cupped his jaw.
“Okay, alright. Show me what you want, doll.” Bucky straightened his back, finally paying attention to the mirror as she pulled his features together once again.
“Hands are too cold still, now you have to kiss all over daddy's face to fix it.” He shrugged playfully.
She sighed but kissed his nose and Bucky involuntarily scrunched it up.
“There! Like dis, dada!” She pointed but Bucky has already unscrunched his nose.
“Like dis, look,” she instructed, scrunching her own nose upwards as best as she could.
“Oh that!” Bucky exclaimed in realization, laughing aloud at her cute imitation.
He didn't even know he did that, let alone that he did it so often. His baby doll was so attentive and amazing.
She nodded with a soft, admiring smile as her hands held his cheeks again, “so pretty, dada.”
“You’re prettier, doll.” Bucky rubbed his nose on hers, kissing above her lips and she giggled.
He didn’t think it was possible, but Bucky loved her even more now that he realized it wasn’t only him that picked up on cute things the other mindlessly did. He couldn’t help but wonder how much stuff she noticed that he didn’t.
“And what else, baby doll?” Her smaller hands were still playing with Bucky’s cheeks.
“What else?” she asked, tilting her head, pressing her thumb to his chin dimple.
“What else do you like about daddy? What else is pretty?”
If Bucky appeared needy he didn’t care. He was ready to revel in the fact that he seemed to hold and reserve her attention even when he didn’t know it.
“Daddy’s arm!” She answered right away, no hesitation.
“R-Really?”
Bucky has never thought of his vibranium arm as ‘pretty’. It was a weapon for the longest time and now it was just a fake limb he needed and so learned to live with. It was stiff and cold and secretly made Bucky feel like a robot every time it whirred. What was pretty about that?
She nodded, her hands leaving Bucky’s face to bring his arm from around her. She rested the metal hand on her lap and softly pushed the fingers open, intertwining them with hers.
“What’s pretty about it, doll?” Bucky’s voice was low as he tried to stay composed, not wanting to get emotional already.
“’S so cool and shiny an' so strong; keeps me safe,” she counted for him, the tips of her fingers rubbing the inside of his vibranium palm. “Keeps me cool in summer. Love when dada lets me hold it so I can sleep.” Bucky chuckled at that, his flesh thumb stroking her cheek softly.
“You’re not bothered by the sounds it makes?” Bucky asked, moving his arm so she could hear what sound he was talking about.
“No. I love ‘em.” She held Bucky’s wrist to her chest and hugged it. “I know dada’s looking for me in his sleep when I hear them at night.”
“It wakes you up?! Doll, I’m sor-”
“No, dada. I like it. Lets me know to get closer to you,” she reassured Bucky, kissing his black and gold knuckles as she tightened her hold around the arm, making Bucky's eyes go teary.
“My god, I adore you.” Bucky shook his head with a chuckle, releasing his arm from her grasp and wrapping it around her to bring her to his chest, “you’re too good to me, doll.”
Bucky could never have enough words to describe the true depth of his love for her. This treasure of a human being who woke up every day choosing to be his. This kind, pure baby who saw the best in him. She owned Bucky and he hoped she knew.
She smiled timidly in his hold and Bucky kissed her forehead, “the best baby doll ever.”
He pecked her nose and she blushed, “the sweetest little thing on earth.”
Bucky kissed the corner of her mouth, “so beautiful and so good for me.” He pressed a tender kiss to her lips, making her close her eyes.
The way she gazed at him when she opened them again made Bucky all warm and fuzzy inside. She was the most precious little one and she still looked at him like he made the sun rise every morning or gave birds the ability to twitter. She looked at Bucky and saw nothing but goodness and beauty to be admired.
Whatever he thought was a quirk she thought it was what made him pretty. He saw years of violence and murder in the dark reflection of his arm, but she saw her safety and protection. She saw the angel wings behind his demon and the exquisiteness buried underneath damage and distortion. She saw him for him and she much-loved all of it; appreciated all of it.
“I love you, dada,” she said softly, wrapping her hands around Bucky’s neck and kissing his jaw.
I know and I still can’t believe it, Bucky wanted to say.
He pressed their foreheads together instead, rubbing his nose on hers again “I love you more, my doll.” Bucky’s smiling lips brushed hers, “I love you.”
~~~~
Tags: @harrysthiccthighss @tinystudentfirepurse
#bucky barnes x fluff#bucky barnes x little!reader#daddy!bucky barnes x little!reader#daddy bucky#daddy!bucky x reader#daddy!bucky barnes#daddy!bucky barnes x reader#daddy!bucky x little!reader#daddy!bucky#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky fluff#bucky barnes fluff#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes x f!reader#bucky barnes#bucky barnes drabble#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes blurb#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes ff#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x you#bucky fic#bucky oneshot#bucky imagine#bucky x little!reader
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When a Book Beckons
Aelin Galathynius x Rowan Whitethorn - Bookshop
When Aelin finds a flyer advertising a strange bookshop, she can't help but follow its cryptic directions. Why does she feel called to it? And why does the mysterious, silver-haired bookkeeper feel so familiar?
Written for Rowaelin Month 2021. Day 28: Bookshop
Masterlist | Read on Ao3 | Rowaelin Month Masterlist
Warnings: Language
4146 words
*******
The wind whistled through the narrow cobblestone street, carrying with it the sweet, honeyed smell of candied nuts, and lifting golden blonde strands of hair to dance around Aelin’s face. It blew between tilting buildings and colorful vendor’s carts selling everything from freshly cut flowers to beautiful watercolor prints.
Aelin grinned as a small group of children ran through the street playing a game and laughing as they chased each other. Finishing her last chocolate-covered hazelnut she’d bought from one of the vendors, Aelin threw away her now empty bag, and pulled out her local guidebook. It was her first time visiting this part of the country and she was determined to make the most of it. Aelin flipped to the pages about out-of-the-way, hole-in-the-wall places. She wanted to find a bakery, or a mom-and-pop general store, or a local second-hand shop, maybe?
She’d barely dragged her face out of the guidebook, trying and failing to pronounce the name of one of the local patisseries, when she noticed a folded piece of paper had gotten caught beneath her shoe.
Leaning down and brushing a flyaway strand of hair behind her ear, Aelin picked it up expecting it to be an old receipt someone had dropped. She turned the crumpled piece of paper over and read the faint writing.
It was a handwritten flyer advertising a local bookshop.
Aelin loosed an excited laugh. A bookshop—it was perfect, and based on the way the flyer was drawn, this place certainly didn’t seem like somewhere her guidebook would advertise. All the better; even fewer tourists to worry about.
Although, she reigned in her giddiness for a moment, she should probably make sure it wasn’t a scam or a front for kidnappers masquerading as a shop meant to lure in unsuspecting book addicts. She laughed at herself, she was being paranoid, a bookshop was a bookshop, right?
But as Aelin kept reading the flyer for Once Upon a Page, searching for an address, her excitement quickly morphed into confusion as she read the directions on how to find the shop.
Follow the dented cobblestone until you can no longer.
The broken lamppost points your way.
Circle the fountain until you see the arrow, heed its trajectory.
If you pass the hawk’s wings, you’ve gone too far.
What the—
This had to be fake; what kind of directions were these? Whoever owned the store wouldn’t get any business if they wrote all their instructions in riddles. Just give her the address and she could figure it out from there.
She was tempted to throw the paper away and move on to the next stop her guidebook suggested.
And yet...
When she’d picked up the paper and read the name of the bookshop, something stirred in Aelin. It was a feeling deep in her gut, like she needed to go there.
Sighing, Aelin turned, trying to spot someone who might be able to give her clearer directions than The broken lamppost points your way.
An older woman with graying hair stood outside her small vendor cart overflowing with flowers. Aelin crossed the street and waited until the woman looked up from her growing bouquet.
“Excuse me? Could you tell me how to get to Once Upon a Page?”
Instead of answering like Aelin expected her to, she merely sat and narrowed her eyes, brows furrowing in confusion.
Aelin lifted the flyer to show her, “Once Upon a Page. This says it’s a bookshop around here, can you point me in the right direction?” Aelin smiled, hoping to charm the woman into helping her. “The directions here are a little hard to follow.”
The woman looked up from where she’d been scrutinizing the flyer and leaned back in her chair. In a gravelly voice, she told Aelin, “I’m sorry, dearie, I’m not familiar with that place.”
It was Aelin’s turn to look confused. “You’re not?” By the details from the flyer, it seemed like the bookstore had been around for a while. Was this woman new to the area and didn’t recognize it? She should have at least been aware of the shop if she’d lived here a while, right?
The woman shook her head and half of her attention went towards a new customer who’d approached the stand, quickly striking up a conversation about his children and grandchildren, obviously well acquainted with his life, before glancing once more at Aelin and saying, “I’ve never heard of it before.”
Odd. More than odd, Aelin thought as she stared at the flyer in bewilderment. But not one to back down from a challenge, Aelin was determined to find Once Upon a Page. And she wouldn’t turn down a trip to see some books. Besides, she had the afternoon free ahead of her, so why not follow some obscure, cryptic instructions to find a mysterious bookshop. This could be fun.
Aelin glanced at the first line of directions: Follow the dented cobblestone until you can no longer. She scanned the street, eyes catching on a few rows of stones that looked chipped beyond the normal wear from years of foot traffic. She followed the line of stones and grinned as she saw it continued down the next street.
As she slid her guidebook back into her bag and focused on the path ahead of her, Aelin was too excited to wonder how the directions perfectly began from the place she’d been standing.
Aelin walked for four more blocks, carefully following the narrow path of worn cobblestones. She was so focused on them that she barely caught herself from walking straight into the wall in front of her.
A dead end. She frowned; did she miss something? Or was she following some fool’s errand, and all of this was made up and she was wasting her time? Aelin pulled the flyer back out and realized she’d followed the instructions perfectly. Follow the dented cobblestone until you can no longer. Well, she no longer could, so what was the next line? The broken lamppost points your way.
Broken lamppost. Aelin swung around and saw just across the street was an old lamppost with one of its metal hooks broken and hanging at an awkward angle.
Giddy, she jogged towards it and tried to figure out where it would be pointing. The broken piece of metal? That was either pointing at the stone wall behind it or at the ground and unless Aelin was supposed to go into the sewers, then that wasn’t it. She circled the post, finally seeing a sticker on one side of a waterspout.
If she stood facing the sticker then she was also facing down one of the paths leading away from the dead end. Frowning at the image, Aelin pulled out the flyer once more. The next direction referenced a fountain, could the spout be referencing that, too?
She’d try, and if she couldn’t find a fountain, then she would retrace her steps. Aelin double-checked lamppost once more for any other obvious clue she’d missed before walking down the path opposite the sticker.
Aelin grinned as she walked. It felt like she was on some wild scavenger hunt, she loved it. And the longer she trekked, the more she felt like she was being guided—not in a bad way, more like something in her was being called to and she was determined to figure out what.
Aelin stepped out of the alley into a small open square, the center of which housed a circular fountain. It took all her might not to squeal in excitement. She figured the people minding their own business in the square wouldn’t appreciate that too much.
Circle the fountain until you see the arrow, heed its trajectory. Easy. Aelin approached the fountain and began walking only to stop almost immediately as she spied the small statue carved into the top of the fountain. It was a faceless archer with a single arrow in its sheath. Aelin followed its point and her gaze was directed to another small alley across the square.
Not hesitating, Aelin walked straight into the alley and didn’t look back.
She’d been walking for several minutes, too excited to be paying attention to details. That is, until she passed one more cross-street and came face to face with a faded drawing on the opposite building. It was an old, painted image of a hawk with its wings spread and beak open in a call.
Aelin furrowed her brows at the bird, there was something about it that pricked at her memory. She quickly pulled the flyer back out and read the last line. If you pass the hawk’s wings, you’ve gone too far.
Aelin spun around, her gaze landing on the last street she’d passed. She quickly walked back and peered down it to find a small alcove in the wall which held a single, distinct storefront.
Beaming, Aelin paused as she slowly approached Once Upon a Page. The shop wasn’t large, at least not that she could tell by the outside. A wooden door that was painted a deep, rich green and was worn with age but appeared no less inviting, stood between a single window on one side and a larger triple window on the other. Each windowpane was held within gilded edges that matched the golden script of Once Upon a Page above the door.
The lights inside were dim and Aelin had the sudden, dreaded thought that the shop might be closed. Wouldn’t that just be her luck?
Aelin twisted to tuck the flyer back into her bag, taking a deep breath. When she looked back up at the shop, she cocked her head to the side, confused, as she eyed a hand-painted Open sign hanging from the door. Strange. She hadn’t noticed that a moment ago.
Shaking off the peculiar feeling, Aelin carefully pushed on the door, smiling as it opened with ease, and listened to the light chime of a bell as it sounded through the shop.
***
Rowan sat behind the desk in the back of the store’s front room. He’d just finished making a fresh cup of tea and was letting it steep on the counter next to him as he faced the shallow shelf standing behind the desk and went to pick up the book he’d last placed there.
His fingers almost brushed the spine when the bell above the front door chimed.
Rowan’s head whipped around, eyes snapping to the sound.
Someone was here. Someone had found their way to the bookshop.
No one ever found their way to the bookshop.
Standing just inside the front door was a woman with long, golden blonde hair and bright blue eyes. She hadn’t noticed him yet, so he quietly left his seat and walked around the nearest shelf to get a better look. He wasn’t sure who she was or why she was here, all he knew was that not just anyone stumbled into Once Upon a Page; that, and the fact that he wished he’d thought to grab his tea before leaving his desk.
***
The moment the door shut behind Aelin it was as if the rest of the world faded away.
The inside of the shop felt cozy—inviting. Wooden shelves lined the walls and stood tall to create a meandering path through the space. Each case was piled with books and sprinkled with trinkets, figurines, and odd contraptions that Aelin couldn’t quite understand. Warm, soft lights hung from the ceiling to provide just enough glow to illuminate the titles along the walls.
Aelin blinked a few times as her eyes adjusted, taking in the soft ticking of a clock and light rustling of paper until her eyes could focus better in the dim room.
Rooms, actually. Turning in place, Aelin could see a narrow doorway on one side of the main room just up a few stairs. Taking a couple steps farther into the shop, she saw that the next room housed several shelves of its own as well. It was beautiful.
Aelin didn’t see anyone else or hear any other voices in the shop. She did, however, see a steaming mug on the front counter so she assumed whoever worked here had just stepped away.
Walking slowly towards one of the shelves, Aelin brushed off the odd sensation she’d felt once the door had closed. It was almost as if that insistent feeling she’d had earlier of being called to, had been steadied just by being in the bookshop.
She shook off the thought, it had to just be the natural calm of being surrounded by books.
“Are you looking for anything in particular?”
Aelin cursed and spun around, her hand pressing against her rapidly beating heart. She was staring directly at a man’s chest and she had to drag her gaze up until her neck craned back to meet a pair of pine green eyes.
Eyes that were looking at her curiously from behind a pair of clear-rimmed glasses.
It wasn’t just his eyes that caught her attention, it was also his silvery hair. It wasn’t a light blonde or grey with age—not that he would be greying with age, he looked maybe thirty if she had to guess—it was purely silver. And if that wasn’t enough, when he turned his head, she saw that the side of his face was covered with an intricate tattoo.
But it was the expression he wore as he gazed down at her that had her pausing. She couldn’t name the exact emotion that flitted across his features, but between the tilt of his head, his slightly narrowed eyes, furrowed brow, and parted lips, he was looking at her like he couldn’t quite believe his eyes.
Then his lips quirked to the side and his eyes shown with delight before quickly schooling his features into a detached curiosity befitting a helpful store owner.
Aelin blinked, caught off-guard at the strange familiarity she’d felt and the odd way he’d looked at her.
“I, uh,” she stammered before clearing her throat and glancing at the shelves around her. “I was just browsing.”
He raised a single silver eyebrow and leaned against the shelf. When he crossed his arms over his chest, the sleeves of his knit sweater stretched across his biceps in a manner that was far too distracting.
“Not from around here, are you?” he asked, and she heard a faint accent in his words, not the same one she’d heard the vendors and locals speaking with, but something different. Something more unusual.
It was her turn to raise a brow, “Why do you assume that?” Then she winced because as soon as the words left her lips, she knew exactly what he meant. He may have an accent different from the locals, but so did she, and the more she spoke, the more obvious it became.
He chuckled but nodded to the shelves around them, pushing off from the one he’d been using as a support. He took a few steps back toward the front counter and said, “You’re welcome to explore, I’ll be out here if you need anything.”
He took a single step before pausing and searching her face once more, “I’m Rowan, by the way.”
Rowan. He looked like a Rowan. She offered him a bright smile and simply responded, “Aelin.”
He nodded and before he turned, she saw that same unreadable emotion fly across his face. Then he was walking away.
Aelin shook herself, she was here to check out a local bookshop, not a maddeningly attractive bookkeeper.
***
As soon as he’d spoken to her, Rowan knew there was something different about this woman. Aelin.
Could she be—? No, that was impossible. Unless…
Rowan dug beneath the desk and pulled out an old book, setting it on the counter and barely holding in a cough from the small cloud of dust it produced. He started flipping through its pages, searching.
***
It was easy to get distracted once she’d focused her attention on the wall of books. There were so many—it almost seemed like every time she turned back to a shelf she’d just finished perusing, it held new books she hadn’t noticed the first time around. Aelin wasn’t sure how long she spent walking through the shelves of the main room, but at one point she found herself in front of one that provided a small opening through which she could see the bookkeeper.
There was something about him that drew her in; something that felt familiar and important, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.
It also didn’t help that he’d shed his sweater.
The collar she’d spotted earlier poking out from the sweater was apparently attached to a long-sleeve button-down shirt that he’d taken to rolling up to his elbows. It exposed his tan, muscled forearms, one of which was draped with the same intricate tattoo she’d seen on his face. By the way it was reaching up his arm and disappearing beneath his sleeve, she’d bet anything it all connected.
He was hunched over the front desk, flipping through the pages of an old, leather-bound book. Strands of his thick, silver hair fell into his face, but he was too focused to notice, although she caught him huffing once to blow a longer strand out of his eyes. Every few seconds, his glasses would slip down his nose and he’d have to push them back up only to have them slip again. It was endearing.
But then he would flip the page again, causing his hands to flex and suddenly endearing became distracting.
Aelin had to bite her lip as she ducked back behind the shelf, mentally cursing because it was just so unfair that this man was that gods dammed attractive and a fucking bookkeeper. It was too much for her to handle.
She would finish checking out the shop and only on her way out would she strike up a conversation. Aelin chanced one more peek only to see him pull his glasses from his face and carefully clean them before pushing them back on.
Aelin was this close to saying ‘fuck it’ and walking up to him, when her gaze snagged on a small corridor leading away from the main room. It wasn’t the hallway she’d seen before, no—this was even more hidden. It was placed in such a way that one could only see it if they were far enough into the maze of shelves.
Something about it caught and held Aelin’s attention. The beckoning feeling she’d had on her way to the shop returned, and she’d already walked several paces towards it before she realized she’d moved.
Aelin was at the corridor and ascending the three steps that led to a small, dusty, nook without having noticed Rowan’s attention abandoning his book and intently settling on her as he watched her vanish into the hidden room.
***
Rowan watched as Aelin disappeared around the corner, her golden hair shining in the light before he carefully shut his book and rose from his seat. His gaze swept through the small shop landing briefly on the figurines of mythical creatures, rusted swords and daggers in handcrafted sheaths, and tattered maps in languages long buried.
When Rowan looked at the front door and saw the outer sign’s script read Closed, he let a small smile grow as he slipped off his glasses and rested them carefully on the counter. He turned around and gripped the handle of the door that now stood behind him. With one last glance over his shoulder, Rowan stepped through the doorway and vanished.
As the door clicked shut behind him, the small clock on the wall ticked once more before silencing.
***
The air around Aelin felt heavier as she stepped into the small, hidden nook. There was a single floor-to-ceiling bookcase on either wall with barely enough space in between for her to stand. Small lights lined the ceiling creating a halo-like glow in the cramped space.
Part of her wanted to turn around and go back to the main room, her curiosity satiated about what this small room held. But another part of her, the part that ultimately won out, felt like she needed to stay.
That feeling she’d had all afternoon—the calling, the beckoning, the draw—it all seemed to culminate here. Aelin couldn’t understand it, but she needed to. There was something here, something that was vital; she couldn’t say what or why or how, but she needed to figure it out.
Aelin eyed the books on one side of the room before spinning around and scouring the opposite shelf. They all looked similar; all aging, leatherbound editions in some language she couldn’t decipher. She looked over them all once, twice—there.
On a shelf just above eye level sat a book that looked different from the rest. While the others were covered in dust and showed signs of wear, this one was vibrant and appeared untouched, but Aelin had a feeling it was far from new. Its spine looked almost golden in the warm light.
She reached up and plucked it from the shelf.
Aelin couldn’t hold in a gasp as she stared at the book. It wasn’t just vibrant, it was glowing. It's cover shown with golden light that shimmered as she moved it. There was writing on the front in a script she couldn’t read, and it felt strangely light for its size.
That was when Aelin noticed the bookshop had gotten eerily quiet. The clock had stopped ticking, she didn’t hear the bookkeeper—Rowan—flipping through his pages any longer, she couldn’t even hear the faint sound of people from outside the store. Everything had gone silent.
For a moment, Aelin debated calling out to Rowan to see if he hadn’t stepped outside for whatever reason, but she clamped her mouth shut and returned her attention to the book in her arms.
She felt that pull again. Stronger now than it had been before.
Aelin traced her finger over the gilded symbols. Then, while carefully holding the front cover, she opened the book.
A blinding golden light surged from the open pages. It was too bright. The light filled the space around her and Aelin tried dropping the book, but her fingers wouldn’t let it go.
It was too much, too bright, too overwhelming.
The devastating glow was the last thing Aelin knew before darkness engulfed her.
***
Aelin gasped in a shuddering breath and scrambled to her feet.
She was outside. How was she outside? Why was she on the ground? And why did it feel soft?
She blinked, breathing in fresh air and urging her eyes to adjust to the brightness. After a few more moments, she gaped in stunned silence.
Everything was so vivid. The rough, brown trunks of the trees surrounding her were warm and comforting, the leaves stretching across the sky in an interwoven canopy shown like jewels, and the beams of sunlight reaching through the spaces between branches touched the soft grass beneath her feet and warmed the earth.
How had she gotten here? Where was here? What had just happened?
What was she wearing?
Aelin glanced down as her hand brushed across an odd but comfortable fabric of a loose tunic. The shirt was tucked into fitted pants which themselves were secured within laced-up leather boots.
What—?
As she lifted a shaky hand, she finally caught sight of the figure standing in the clearing a few paces in front of her.
It was him. The bookseller. Rowan.
He stood there, watching her patiently as she looked around at the unfamiliar woods. He, too, was wearing different clothing. Gone were the rolled shirt and glasses, instead replaced with attire similar to hers but much more well-worn. He even had a few weapons strapped to him, but Aelin had the feeling that he wasn’t a threat to her.
She opened her mouth to say—
She didn’t know what to say. So many questions flew through her mind that she couldn’t focus on one long enough to voice it.
A quiet flutter drew her attention upwards and Aelin couldn’t control her gasp as she watched a small winged creature wobbly fly from branch to branch. It had scales and a short little snout, and small wings barely strong enough to keep it in flight. The baby dragon cheerfully hovered under another branch before flying out of the clearing.
Aelin blinked rapidly at the spot where the creature disappeared.
She eventually drew her wide-eyed gaze back to the man standing before her. He stepped closer and smirked knowingly, amused but—relieved?
When he spoke, the deep timbre of his accent was much more pronounced than it had been minutes before in the bookshop that suddenly felt so far away.
“I knew it was you. Follow me.”
*****
Taglist:
@acourtofsnakes @allthebooksunderthemoon @astra-ad-mare @becarefuloflove @booklover41802 @charlizeed @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks @danibutterr @doubt-less @emily-gsh @enormousbooklover @foughtconquered @fromthelibraryofemilyj @hakunamatatazz @i-have-but-one-brain-cell @in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jorjy-jo @lemonade-coolattas @mariamuses @mayhemories @midsizewitch @miserablesmusings @morganofthewildfire @nehemikkele @rowaelinismyotp @rowansfirebringer @sayosdreams @sheharahu @sleeping-and-books @stardelia @story-scribbler @superspiritfestival @swankii-art-teacher @tomtenadia @westofmoon @whimsicallyreading @moodymelanist @angelic-voice-1997 @realbookloverproblems @gracie-rosee @julemmaes @yesdreamblog @the-regal-warrior @rowanaelinn @thestoriesyoutell @autumnbabylon @sunflowermoonshinewrites @maastrash @annejulianneh111 @themoonthestarsthesuriel
#rowaelin#aelin#rowan#aelin galathynius#rowan whitethorn#aelin x rowan#rowan x aelin#aelin and rowan#rowan and aelin#aelin galathynius x rowan whitethorn#rowaelin fluff#rowaelin fic#rowaelin fanfiction#throne of glass#tog#rowaelinmonth#rowaelin month#bookshop
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hey rose! (can i call you that?? sorry if that's not your preference) i may or may not have caught a case of crazy phat mad feelings for a boy and i was wondering if you had any cute headcanons about some of the MHA boys pining for a pretty fem reader?? i can't imagine this guy liking me back but i figure hey, if nobody got me ik pretty superhero boys got me AMEN lmbo no pressure on this request. hope you're doing well and things are okay in your world!! thanks love you!! first anon OUT 😌✌️✨💖
omg ya that’s totally cool!! i actually like that!!!! but omg, pls! i’m sure it’ll work out if not... hopefully these headcanons will help u out!!! LOVE U FIRST ANON!!!!!!!!
IZUKU MIDORIYA,
will definitely stare at the back of your head during class and imagine 700 different scenarios that could ‘possibly’ happen if the two of you ever have a conversation that doesn’t involve school.
keeps note of your quirks and tries to give you pointers on how to use ur quirk via crumpled paper airplanes in the courtyard or slipped into ur locker.
will always, always, always keep an eye out for you to make sure you’re okay - if he sees you crying he’s gonna embarrass himself and be like, “you think that’s bad? kachan almost blew me to bits.” and now the both of you are crying.
daydreams about u.
whenever the class is training at the USJ or anywhere really, he’s bouncing. like. literally bouncing on his heels in case something goes wrong, he wants to be able to intervene. not because he thinks you’re not capable of fending for urself but it’s because he literally can not bare the thought of u getting hurt.
he definitely draws ur names with a heart and arrow through it!!!!!!!
really admires u and tries to be really nonchalant about how fond he’s become of u so when the two of you do have a conversation it’s just like... gibberish. you know when he goes on those little rants and the words cloud around him and everyone is like??? midoriya wtf. yeah like that.
BAKUGOU KATSUKI,
explosive boy definitely doesn’t know he likes you until he goes to recovery girl and recovery girl has to explain him the ‘weird’ feeling in his stomach, the rise of temperature in his face and the quickening of his pulse is literally because he has a crush. on you.
and boy does this raging blonde flip his shit. him?? have a crush??? when he’s trying to be number one hero??? a distraction??? not in this lobby.
easier said than done.
tries to avoid you at all costs. like even moves his seat permanently so he doesn’t have to breathe the same air as you.
no because during a training the two of you are teamed up and this man literally holds his breath like he’s five because he doesn’t want to inhale your ‘germs’. but he grows up a bit and realizes that you’re actually pretty strong and can handle your own. heavy emphasis on the pretty.
so not only is he pinning for you but now he sees you as competition. so the initial plan to avoid you goes out of the window because he wants to one up you.
bakugou’s face is tomato red everytime the two of you spar and you think it’s because he’s mad but jokes on u.
takes a HOT minute but he’ll suffer in silence and just y’know open the door and wait five minutes for you to walk through it and then complain after.
sees you in the hallway and flicks you in the forehead and reminds you that he’s going to be number one. but later beats himself up because wtf? why didn’t he say something else.
will go out of his way to fix your fighting stances and then have a coughing fit. so he’s going to push through his feelings but it’s really obvious to everyone else that he isn’t being lowkey, yknow?
IIDA TENYA,
my favorite class rep. he’s going to be so obvious about it. like. he’s an open book.
will offer to help you study. makes sure your chair is pulled out every morning so you don’t have to do it.
will also let you board the bus first.
will also tense up whenever you look at him. holds an emergency class meeting (excluding you) to figure out how to handle this ‘situation’ and everyone is like... dude
he takes kirishima’s ‘show her you’re a manly man’ to serious and tries to show off. with his grades, quirk and his class rep status which you know isn’t working so he’s back to square one.
as bad as it sounds he makes a copy of all of his notes and color codes them based off of his you know ‘coding’ system and has it handy in case you don’t come to class one day or fall behind.
everyone knows but you. everyone also thinks that you would’ve found out by now since iida holds you on your own pedestal but! LOLKDSAJ
DENKI KAMINARI,
okay so.... this man... is so drama. he’s a clutz and obvious but he isn’t going to be direct. whether it’s because he’s scared of being rejected or because he’s not confident enough like bakugou and todoroki is unknown but anywayz
leans on the locker and tries to woo you with some words and falls. literally falls over. it’s okay though (in his eyes) because you immediately get eye level with him and try to check on him. it’s a win in his eyes.
is totally okay with the nickname ‘calamari’ but only likes it when you call him that. he tries to tell everyone that it’s a ‘you and him’ thing and gets teased abt it.
tries to include you in every conversation possible. he wants you to feel included in everything.
thinks ur like a walking goddess and that u should be treated as such.
he gets a little to excited around you so whenever the two of you touch he gives off some electricity and immediately goes on a thirty minute rant on how sorry he is.
makes you... a fucking... mixtape... with scribbled out hearts on the cover.
also... sends you songs to listen to but it’ll be like some random edm song and ur like”oh wow... love that...” and he’s like “ok cross that out she doesn’t like EDM.” and is DETERMINED to find out your favorite genre so the two of you have something to bond over.
changes your ringtone on his phone to the pokemon theme song because and i quote, “she’s the ash to my pikachu.”
isn’t so lowkey about his crush but??? everyone thinks he’s like?? just being himself?? so???
EIJIRO KIRISHIMA,
bro. this man... THIS LOVELY SHARK BOY.
is literally textbook definition of GENTLEMAN.
will not act on his feelings until YOU act on them because he’s scared he’ll overstep so he’s going to be like..... suffering in silence. but he doesn’t mind!!!!!!
holds the door 4 u. :)
checks on u 24/7.
stares at you in class and drools.
walks with you like everywhere. literally. like to class, to the dorms, back to ur parents, to the mall. everywhere.
this is totally a best friend to lovers trope.
whenever he’s got doubt he will turn to u immediately because he trusts u and ur guidance.
will even ask if u could spar with him (so you can a, spend time with him but b, because he wants u to be able to be the best version of urself u can be).
whenever something goes south he will put his hand out in front of u. always. and you’ll wrap your fingers around his bicep and he will melt.
i think he knows he’s like... fucked because you explain to him that although his ‘hardening’ quirk makes his skin... rough, he’s still pretty soft. and smells nice.
man... that gets him THROUGH THE DAYS.
TODOROKI SHOTO,
another clueless boy.
is very confused at first but after some hours of research he’s like oh.
and then shit hits the fan.
like kirishima, really values your input and actually goes to you for advice for two reasons: one because you’re sensible and honest but it’s more for the simple reason that he’s trying to see what you like and don’t like.
you start to notice some changes in his behavior. not drastic ones but enough to raise an eyebrow.
is more vocal in his conversations with you.
tries his best to improve his body language (ie: will face you with undivided attention and arms unfolded to look more receptive)
just stares at you in general to see what your reactions to things are.
like, in the hallway when ur talking to mina and the lowerclassmen says something stupid and the two of you scowl? well, guess what? now he doesn’t like that guy either and will give him a piece of his mind.
has your coffee order memorized so when ur staying up all night studying u have the energy to do so.
will sneak a protein bar and a water bottle in ur locker the day after those binge studying sessions to ensure that you’re you know okay.
#todoroki x female reader#todoroki headcanons#todoroki x fem!reader#kirishima x female reader#kirishima x fem!reader#kirishima headcanons#kaminari x fem!reader#kaminari x female reader#kaminari headcanons#tenya x fem!reader#tenya x female reader#tenya headcanons#bakugou x fem!reader#bakugou x female reader#bakugou headcanons#deku x fem!reader#deku x female reader#deku headcanons#bnha headcanons#mha headcanons#( i really don't feel like i did this well buT I HOPE U LIKE IT FIRST ANON!!!!!!!#I LOVE U!!!!!!#if it's not what u want let me know and i'll redo!!!! )#: ̗̀➛ first anon.#( shoto todoroki ) / * headcanons .#( eijiro kirishima ) / * headcanons .#( denki kaminari ) / * headcanons .#( tenya iida ) / * headcanons .#( katsuki bakugou ) / * headcanons .#( izuku midoriya ) / * headcanons .
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c+k: tendou
tendou x f!reader
cw: 18+ minors dni, nsfw, smut, fluff, morning sex, orgasm denial, oral (f!receiving), fingering, cumming on the reader, cum play, l-bombs, teasing, exhibition/semi-public (no one sees), car sex, unprotected sex, creampie, aftercare, degradation
wc: 1.8k
a/n: hi again friends!! pls enjoy another c+k (almost done),, also idk why i forgot to post this when it's been done forever
“Good morning, love!” His excited tone roused you from the last bits of sleep you were clinging to. Tendou was such a morning person. You could wake up in the morning, but he just came alive, always telling you that it was because he got excited to wake up beside you each day.
“Morning, ‘tori.” You mumbled and stretched. The warmth from the sun glistening through the window was deceiving in comparison to the brisk chill outside.
“It’s Valentine’s Day.” He said brightly.
Having had to suffer through the past week or so of him working overtime, testing out new recipes and combinations and this and that, you knew it was Valentine’s Day. His arms, still snaked around you from last night tighten as he shifts to lay on top of you, nuzzling his face into your chest.
“Happy Valentine’s Day,” you try to match his energy, but to little avail, “I love you.” You crane your neck down just enough to kiss at the top of his head, his buzzed curls tickling under your nose.
“I love you too, y/n.” His demeanor calmed for a moment before almost immediately revamping. Long fingers snaked up your sides under the sweatshirt you stole from him, brushing and prodding exactly where he knew you were sensitive. Yelping and giggling, you thrashed under him, held down by his strong legs that were wrapped around yours.
“If you…” you gasped, “...if you loved me you wouldn’t torture me!”
He pushed the top up and over your head, leaving you completely bare. His lips quickly pressed one little, messy peck after another against your neck, cheeks, chest, anywhere he could.
“We both-” another kiss “-know that’s-” another “-not true.” He slowed enough to press a deep kiss against your mouth and pressed his hips between your legs. Against the thin fabric of his boxers, you could feel the complete outline of his hard cock. “Plus, you beg for me to torture you all the time, love.”
You pouted but kissed him back just as sweetly. “What do you want to do today?” You asked as he pulled away, pushing back the covers to kiss all the way down your stomach.
“Today? I don’t know. Right now? I want to eat my breakfast.” His muffled voice barely reached your ears while he busied his lips with nipping and kissing your hips and thighs.
The comment sent heat straight to your ears. He never ceased to make you feel giddy, especially when he lifted his deep maroon eyes to meet yours just before teased through your folds with a finger.
When he felt you couldn’t take much more of his gentle strokes he licked a thick stipe up your center. A shudder coarse through your body as the tip of his hot muscle landed squarely on your throbbing clit.
“Satori!” You whined, hips already aching to buck against his face. “Please, ah!”
“So sensitive, baby.” He groaned. “Still worked up from last night?” Your cries were not acknowledged as he looped his arms around your thighs and over the top of your stomach to keep you firmly planted in place. Overcome with sensation, you clawed out to grab anything, landing on one of his hands. He offered two fingers for you to grasp while he continued, unbothered.
“G-gonna… gonna,” you try to sputter out the words, feeling the sparks in your stomach coming to a head.
Tendou pulled away abruptly with a fake, quizzical look on his face. “You’re gonna what?” He settled his chin on his hands against your tummy, kissing lazily just against your skin. The slick from your now-aching cunt glistened on his lip under the hazy, morning sun.
“P-please?” You were nearly in tears, so close to release if he even shifted his abdomen the right way against your mound, you might come undone.
“Please what, baby?” He kept up the silly act well. “What do you need?” You, on the other hand, were heaving and panting under him.
“Such a tease, ‘tori.” You squeeze the words out eventually. “I wanna cum.”
“Hmm, that,” he disentangled one of his hands from under his head and traced it down your dripping core. One of his digits easily slipped past the slick and into your entrance. He curled it against the sweet, spongey spot inside of you, making you clamp around him. “I bet you do.”
“I do, I do!” You whine, not caring if you look desperate now. “Please, Satori, wanna cum so bad, please, I’ll do anything, please!”
Wrong answer.
He sat back on his heels, eyeing you down with a dark smirk that made you feel so small and helpless. “Okay, but remember you said ‘anything’.” The pretty red tip of his long cock peeked out from the band of his underwear, precum leaking wherever it could. He pulled his length out and brushed it up and down your slit. “I’m going to cum all over this pretty little cunt, then we’re going to go on a little trip, and if you can stop yourself from making a mess like a little slut, then you can cum all you want.”
It felt like a trap, but you knew he would stick to his word. Your head was nodding before he even finished speaking. As soon as he got your quick verbal confirmation, he lined himself up and slipped into your eager opening. The burn made you clench and quake under him, but he kept a steady, albeit slow, pace of entering you.
“You feel so good, baby.” He pulled your thighs off the bed so he could stay kneeling, and the new angle pushed him even deeper into you. On instinct, your legs wrapped around his hips as best they could. “If you keep squeezing me like that I won’t last very long.”
You wanted to tell him it wasn’t on purpose. Your cunt clamped around him on its own accord, sensitive from being stuffed so full. The words came out instead as just a garbled mess of moans. He smiled down at your form, already so ruined, before he started pistoning into you. His hold on your hips never waivered and he kept you exactly where he needed to.
The lewd sounds coming from between your legs bounced around in your head, making you slump back to let him take you. His eyes left yours when you relaxed into the bed. He was too focused on watching exactly how your cunt swallowed him whole, dragging him in and gushing around him. In no time, a creamy ring landed around the base of his cock, driving a blush into his cheeks. You even, wanton moans were beautiful music to his ears.
Unsure of how much time had passed, you only tensed when his thrusts became sloppier and his tip twitched against your walls. He shuddered out a sigh and let himself slip out of your dripping center, setting you back on the bed.
“Keep those legs open, baby.” He whined, pumping himself quickly before his hot cum shot in ropes against your open cunt. Without missing a beat, he pressed his cock against your cunt, rutting against you, his tip slipping just past your entrance until he was pumped dry. “Good girl...good girl.” He moaned.
...
Four hours later you had some regrets. Maybe more than some. Now you were standing at the top of the hill in Montmartre wishing you could take bake your words. You wore a skirt that was just a little too short for the weather and tight panties Tendou had picked out for you. When a cool wind bruised against the front of your thighs.
You tugged on his sleeve, “Satori.” You whispered.
“What is it, love?”
“Can’t take it anymore, please can we just… I don’t know, can we go home? Please?” Your lips brush against the shell of his ear.
“I can’t say no when you ask so nicely.” He grabbed your hand and rushed you away to the corner you had parked on. Your feet stumbled over the cobble as you tried to keep up with his long strides.
Before you realized you had even arrived at the corner, the back door of the car swung open and you were thrown in. Just as you sat up he was pushing you down again and flipping up your skirt.
"Soaked," he grinned. His fingers slid up the fabric, teasing the mess beneath. You could feel the mix of cum squishing between your legs, threatening to leak out the sides of the too-tight underwear as he pressed against it.
"Di-didn't make a mess." You sighed when he finally pulled them down your legs and tossed them into the front seat.
"I see, love." He traced up your cunt, collecting cum on his fingertips and bringing it to your lips. You took them into your mouth with a second thought. Your tongue swirled around his fingers, sucking tightly. "Good girl."
With his other hand, he reached down and hurriedly unzipped his pants. You wrapped your legs around him, pulling him in just as he took his fingers from your mouth. A trail of saliva connected your tongue to his fingertip that made his own mouth run dry.
"All clean." He complimented and untucked himself.
"Want you, please, wanna cum, 'tori, please." You gasped as his cock slapped against your slit, teasing your entrance.
"Mhmm, course… you deserve it."
Tendou groaned as he slipped right into you. With the amount of cum splashing between your legs and the dull ache of want, he easily molded himself to you. Not waiting more than a second, he started pumping into you fast and reached his thumb down to tweak your throbbing clit.
"Been hard since we left the apartment. Thinking about your fucking cries and moans, whining for my cock. So cute, baby." He shuddered when he hit a particularly deep spot within you and you clamped down around him.
Your head was empty, too focused on how his thumb was kneading just right against your clit. His hips started stuttering with your own and you hit the edge within moments of one another. It came over you in a rushing wave, one jolt after another.
More of his cum spattered inside of you, filling you to the brim. Your damp thighs shook around him in the cold car as they searched for any warmth now that both your bodies had stilled.
He slumped over you and sighed heavily into your ear. "Good girl, felt so good. You okay, baby?"
"Y-yeah, I'm good, just cold. Kinda thirsty." You sputter out. He reached for the discarded underwear and cleaned you up as best he could before he cleaned himself and tucked his softening cock back into his pants.
"We'll get some drinks on the way home," he kissed you sweetly on the tip of your nose. "Happy Valentine's Day."
#tendou x reader#satori tendou x reader#tendou smut#tendo x reader#satori tendo x reader#tendo smut#satori tendou smut#tendou x you#tendou x y/n#hq imagine#s.valentines
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In Defense of Salt AND Sugar: Aka ML Fandom pls chill out.
So I don’t talk much as those who follow me will say I tend to just stick to myself and my own things. HOWEVER, Ive gotten a lot of asks about why I write both Salt and Sugar for Miraculous Ladybug.
The short answer: Both salt and sugar are valid, fun, intriguing things to read and write and the point of writing is to entertain and be entertained.
The long answer: Salt isn’t inherently someone hating on your fav show and sugar isn't someone necessarily giving it a free pass either. Ya’ll are just dramatic as hell.
The LONGER answer:
I write salt because I LIKE Miraculous Ladybug, BUT the show has not lived up to its potential AT ALL. The show could be so much better and the characters are so flawed or full of holes that occasionally I feel FRUSTRATED and mad!
I hate that Alya a character who I was so excited about, gets shafted ignored, sidelined, or written like a jerk! She could have been this great detective working alongside her friend to unmask the villain, but instead she often comes across as pushy, obsessed with Ladynoir or Adrinette, and so damn easily tricked. Not to mention how when shes not gushing over her ‘ships’ shes pushed to the side and ignored. [or you know... LILA]
I hate that Marinette’s crush makes her do things that are so cringy and awkward i feel ill I hate that she’s constantly the only one making mistakes and ‘learning lessons’ when the show has all these other great characters that could use the spotlight and be the ones learning lessons. I hate that she’s so jealous and that she cant ever seem to catch a break as if the show is punishing her constantly.
I HATE that Adrien is a mary sue, how the writers say hes perfect and treat him as such, I hate that he gets to guilt Marinette into fixing everything and dealing with bullies, I wanted a funny, Ron Stoppable, naive boy who learns about real friendships and grows into a great partner. Instead he gets to be pushy and downright a jerk as Chat Noir ignoring his responsibilities, guilting Ladybug with his feelings, never taking no as an answer. He’s not a good role model for kids.
I hate that Chloe got built up to have a redemption arc several times only for the writers to decide that Chloe a teenage girl who needs some serious therapy [and actual reasonable punishment for her actions] is worse than Gabriel child abuse Agreste. She could have been a great lesson on compassion and growth and dealing with your own pain without hurting others. Instead the writers wrote her off completely.
And dont get me started on how the show treats Nino, Kagami, Luka and the rest of the cast. They may as well be a backdrop for the forced love square that we NEVER get a break from. Seriously I’m a sucker for romance but does it need to be EVERY damn episode?! Can’t we just get some wholesome friendship between everyone including Adrien and Marinette at this point like COME ON.
And i’m not even touching on the white washing, awful lessons on responsibility and forgiveness, awful lessons on well so much other stuff really, the guilt trips, the teacher, the fact that she show could be used to teach kids how to better handle negative emotions and the importance of open communication and not keeping quiet about injustice and/or your feelings but instead decided that the main priority should be a love square that gets force fed to us EVERY SINGLE EPISODE.
My point is the show has FLAWS. That doesn’t mean its the worse show ever and it doesn’t mean its not fun, and has a great premise and characters, and so when I write Salt I write it because i’m frustrated! Im frustrated with the show, with the characters, with the writing and so I vent that out with salt I write those characters as their worst selves because I cant stand how the show has decided to treat them and Im ANGRY and disappointed.
It feels good to write salt and to read it. It’s nice to see characters get called out for bad behavior, its nice to read about Adrien not getting the girl. Its nice to occasionally indulge in salt because it validates that the show is flawed and lets you get out that frustration.
BUT ON THE FLIP SIDE
Miraculous Ladybug is a lovely show. It’s a show that decided to give little girls a FEMALE HERO. And not just as a side kick or background character! No they made her the protagonist! Its so important to me that little girls see good well rounded female characters in media.
And even if the show is clumsy about it they are TRYING to build an expansive lore that tickles the theorist brain. And gets people invested in the world.
The show also made Marinette shy, and awkward, and clumsy something a lot of girls deal with during puberty as growing up can literally make you clumsier as your body adjusts. Having a character who tries to be positive and tries to find solutions who solves things with creativity instead of pure violence. Thats LOVELY for young girls to see.
Growing up I loved and admired Kim Possible, and probably would have loved Marinette, even if the shows not perfect I can admit its trying and I can see why people love it as much as they do! And why they write these fluffy sugary fics its the reason I WRITE fluffy sugary things.
Because even though I am frustrated and angry and disappointed with the show, I still see Alya’s potential and how great she is as representation to little girls who want a black female superhero so I write fluff where Alya’s loyalty, compassion, cleverness and her pursuit of justice are center stage.
I see how Adrien could be better and I want him to be better and I WANT him to be the naive funny comic relief the Ron Stoppable to Marinette’s Kim Possible. I want Adrien to grow and learn and spit in his dad’s face I want him to overcome the abuse and be happy. To show people that neglect and abuse doesn’t mean you will get stuck like that forever, that you can overcome that and be a better kinder person.
I want Nino and Kagami, and Luka and Chloe and the class to grow and get attention and have funny moments I want to laugh and make other people laugh! So I write prompts focused around comedy and shenanigans and where the characters get to be fun and silly and make decisions for themselves!
SO IN CONCLUSION:
I write salt AND sugar. I see the value and merit in both sides of the coin, and I respect how other people see the show. I know its easy to get angry with other people in the fandom who see the show differently then you do but please can we put down the weapons and just BREATHE.
Someone who writes salt might LOVE the same show as you, and they might in fact love it so much that they vent their frustrations in angst and salt and cracky fics. Let them vent about how they wish the show was better, leave their tags alone or block them if you cant stand to see it. But dont attack salt writers for ‘hating on your show’ when they might love it just as much as you do but want a way to vent out their feelings.
On the flip someone who writes sugar might NOT be forgiving the show for its flaws, they might see all the same flaws as you but decide to take that frustration and write fluff and fix it fics and sugar because they want to indulge in a version of their favorite show where everything is just... OK. Where everyone is well written and happy and the character development sticks. Stay out of their tags let them have their sugar, they aren't writing it to hurt you just like you don't write salt to hurt them.
So ENOUGH. Enough hunting each other down, enough sending each other hate, enough filling each others tags. Let people write SALT if they feel angry and vengeful and disappointment, let them have their tags, let them explore the dark side of the characters, let them rant and rave and be HURT when the characters they love upset them with their actions. Its not your place to tell them to stop, to tell them their feelings are invalid, to tell them that ‘adrien is sweet sunshine boy how dare you’ or ‘alya would never’ or ‘i hate your marinette leaves dupont au’. Just leave it be, heed the tags, and let it go.
AND ENOUGH. Enough hunting each other down, enough sending each other hate, enough filling each other tags. Let people write SUGAR if they just want something to feel happy about. Let them makes coffee shop au’s, let them make fix it fics where everything is just happy without needing 8 pages of backstory for why everything is just happy. Let them squeal and gush and talk about the ship they like and the fluff they see. Its not your place to argue with them that the show is flawed, its not cool to ruin their fun by accusing them of not understanding the flaws, to tell them ‘umm actual this character shouldn’t get to be happy’ or ‘wow this is so shallow’. Just leave it be, heed the tags, and let it go.
PS: Now with that said and done. I do have one final message for everyone - If you write/enjoy pedophilia, if you sexualize KIDS. Then get the fuck out of fandom spaces, stop fucking following me, and do everyone salt and sugar a favor by LEAVING. Your pedophilia and child sexualization aint wanted, aint ok, and I will fight you.
PSS: IF YOU HATE WHAT IVE SAID ABOUT SUGAR AND SALT FINE OK I RESPECT YOU REGARDLESS. ENJOY THE SHOW, STAY CLASSY, DONT HURT PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY HAVE A DIFFERENT OPINION.
#its just me#ml salt#ml sugar#adrien salt#adrien sugar#alya salt#alya sugar#chloe salt#chloe sugar#miraculous ladybug#marinette dupain cheng#adrien agreste#alya cesaire#class salt#class sugar
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Meet Cute (pt. 2) - Luke Patterson x Reader
Read Part 1 here
So....I got a little carried away with this. If you don’t like it, pls don’t ever tell me lolol (also, yes, the lyrics included are Miss Taylor Swift’s)
Y/N placed her bag down at her usual table. She took a look around the room, trying to draw as little attention as she could as she looked around the room for those hazel eyes. Unsatisfied with her assessment, she sits down at the table and opens her book.
Within a second, a soft voice tickled her ear. “Looking for someone in particular?” She felt her ears burn as he giggled softly close to her face.
She turned to be met by the smiling barista, coffee splattered all over his apron and flour attached to the sides of his arms. She tried her best not to smile too quickly back at him, tucking a piece of her falling hair behind her ear.
“Nope.” She stated, scrunching her nose up at him. He rolled his eyes, leaning on the table in front of her.
“Well are you going to order something or do you plan on freeloading all afternoon?” She popped her jaw as his eyes bulged, raising his eyebrows at her.
She set down her book and placed her hand on her chest, mouth ajar in his direction “Not with this kind of customer service.”
His smile grew even wider as he shooed her gaze off of him with the towel in his hand. He slid the open chair toward her, sitting down and leaning his elbow on the granite below.
Can I at least get a chai ready for you, miss comedian?”
She brought her finger up to her face, tapping her cheek a few times before nodding. She moved to grab her wallet out of her bag, but by the time she did, he was out of sight.
She leaned over to look at the bar, where she saw him running quickly to the machine, booting his coworker off of it with a push of his hip. She smiled dreamily as he worked quickly, steaming milk, and then flipping over to the other side to start steeping the tea. He eventually poured something into an orange mug with a smile on his face. She watched him carefully sprinkle cinnamon on top of it, his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth as he did. As his eyes moved away from the cup, she leaned back over to face forward at the table and lifted her book to her face again.
It took a few seconds for him to walk over to her table. She forced herself to keep her eyes on the words in front of her until the glass actually hit the table. She lifted her eyes to meet it with a small smile. She looked up to see him beaming down at it with his hands out.
“Ba daaaa…” He said with jazz hands shaking at his creation.
“Thank you,” She said simply, picking her card up from the table next to her “How much do I owe you?”
He shook his head “I get a free drink a day, this one is yours.”
She frowned at him, pushing the debit out toward him. “No, Luke come on…” He rose his hands, refusing to take the card from her once again. She moved her feet, preparing to get out of her chair but Luke took off on foot back toward the bar.
She looked down at the ground, shaking her head before rotating back to her book. She leaned over to her bag, pulling out her pencil and tucking it behind her hair. She had created a habit of spinning her shoulder-length hair around writing utensils to make a makeshift ponytail. She pressed down on the middle of her bun to make sure it was secured before bringing her hands back down to the table. She chewed on the middle of her lip as she finally dove into her first poem of the evening.
A moment passes before her phone buzzes against the table. She finishes the line she’s on before picking it up. She looks at the message from an unknown number with furrowed brows. She swipes it open, eyes falling on the word “purple.”
Unknown: “Hey purple, it’s your favorite barista.”
She smirks down at the device, quickly typing her response. “Shouldn’t my favorite barista be working and not texting customers?”
Unknown: “Yeah well...we’re dead and I want to talk to you without being whipped by my boss again.”
She giggled, her mind falling back to the sound of the towel slapping back and forth on the barista’s back. “You are making it quite difficult for me to focus on my reading….”
Unknown: “So studious. I guess we can talk later. :(“
She rolled her eyes, not responding to his pouting. She placed her phone face down on the table and gripped the book in her hands once again.
Y/N eventually finished the book in one sitting, with extra time she planned to spare. She pulled out her notebook from her bag and flipped to a fresh page. She leaned over to rummage through her bag for another pencil. She felt her hair collapse around her face and sat up straight, she turned to see Luke holding up the purple mechanical pencil in his hand as he hovered over her.
“Need this?” He winked in her direction, his eyes drawing over her features. “I think I like your hair better down anyway,”
She pulled her curls behind her ears and shook her head up at him as she reached for the writing utensil.
“Unbelievable,” She muttered.
A smirk reappeared on his face as he held out the pencil, shaking it between his fingers. She reached over and he caught her wrist with his free hand. She tried and failed to hold back the audible gasp that came with his sudden touch. He flipped her hand over, place the pencil in it before closing her hand around the small object. He placed his hand on top of hers for a moment before letting her go.
She turned back to face forward, hoping the growing redness on her face and ears weren’t as apparent as it felt. He slid into the chair in front of her, catching her eyes again. He set his elbows on the table and leaned his chin in his palms.
“So you’re actually writing tonight?”
“Are you on break?” She rose an eyebrow at him.
He shrugged “Kind of?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. He was unbelievably determined. She watched as his eyes fell to her open notebook and back to her eyes.
“What are you writing.”
She sighed, tapping her pencil on the table. “That’s the problem, I’m not sure yet.”
He nodded, propping his hand under his chin as he looked over in the distance. Almost as if a lightbulb turned on in his brain, his expression changed to one of excitement. “How about I help you?”
She shook her head “You’re going to get yourself fired if you just sit here and try to help me brainstorm…”
He laughed again, digging into his pocket “I’m not going to just sit here….I have…” He pulled out a square piece of paper and pushed it over toward her. She stared at it for a moment before looking up at Luke in confusion. He lifted the paper into his hands and unraveled it, pressing the open paper to the table before pushing it over to her once more. She read through the chicken scratched lines as he spoke to her.
“These are lyrics I started writing last night. Maybe you could respond to them?”
She rose an eyebrow “I don’t write music.”
Luke scoffed, rolling his eyes at her “I meant write-in in your medium of choice. Write a poem or just a few statements in the way that someone may respond to what’s being sung.”
She moved the paper back toward him “Luke I can’t just take your work like that.” His hand moved to cover hers as his smile grew.
“I want you to take it, use it if you can. I’ll be waiting…” He stood up from the table, running over to his very unenthusiastic coworker.
She held the paper in both hands as she started to read the lyrics. She felt her heart pick up even staring at the writing, feeling like she was reading directly into someone’s diary.
“And you stood there in front of me just, Close enough to touch, close enough to hope you couldn't see what I was thinking of. Drop everything now, meet me in the pouring rain, kiss me on the sidewalk, take away the pain 'Cause I see, sparks fly, whenever you smile.”
There was a large space between paragraphs. He must have pieces missing still, she thought. She let her eyes fall to the next line, a small smile forming on her lips.
“I run my fingers through your hair and watch the lights go wild. Just keep on keeping your eyes on me, its just wrong enough to make it feel right. And lead me up the staircase, won't you whisper soft and slow? And I'm captivated by you baby, like a fireworks show.”
Y/N sat there in awe as she read through the short lines over and over. Whoever Luke was talking to, he was really in deep. His cool demeanor didn’t give away this kind, vulnerable sound that came through his lyrics. She tapped her pencil as she began to think thoroughly about these short lines.
Luke has to be extremely infatuated with this love interest he’s writing to, she decided. So she decided to write from the perspective of the girl, who is hesitant to be as confident about the possibility of a relationship budding between them. Her hand wrote frantically across the page as her mind ran wild.
“The way you move is like a full-on rainstorm, and I'm a house of cards. You're the kind of reckless that should send me running, but I know that I won't get far.”
She thought these lines might sound a little corny, but she loved it already. She sat and gazed over at Luke at the counter. He was already leaning over the ice cream area, smiling in her direction. She shot him a quick smile, looking into his brown-green eyes before looking back at the table and putting the pen to paper again.
“Get me with those green eyes, baby as the lights go down, give something that'll haunt me whenever you're not around, 'cause I see, sparks fly, when you smile.”
She wanted to go a bit deeper than the fluff, so she concentrated on the next part being the girl’s nerves. She’d never felt like writing had ever come this simply to her, practically overflowing in her mind before she’s able to capture it in words.
“My mind forgets to remind me, you’re a bad idea, You touch me once and it's really something, you find I'm even better than you, imagined I would be. I'm on my guard for the rest of the world, but with you, I know its no good. And I could wait patiently, but I really wish you would.”
She decided to end it with a call and response to Luke’s initial lyrics, rewriting “Drop everything now, meet me in the pouring rain, kiss me on the sidewalk take away the pain 'Cause I see, sparks fly, whenever you smile.”
Y/N put down her pencil and read it back a couple of times and she couldn’t help but beam at the paper below her.
“Is it going well?” A voice boomed over her shoulder, causing her to jump up in her seat, hearing a familiar laugh behind her.
She turned to him with wide eyes “Do you ever like to enter a room quietly?” He shook his head at her, the two laughing together as Luke took a seat at the table. He put his hand out toward her notebook.
“Let me see what ya got, Y/N.”
She hesitated, playing with the red ribbon that sat in the middle of the page. Luke’s face softened as he noticed her anxious tick. “I promise I won’t judge, and if I do...you have every right to never speak to me again.” She sighed, meeting his eyes, Luke’s teeth atop of his bottom lip. “Y/N, I understand how vulnerable creative work can be, I promise you...it’s between you and me.” his finger pointing back and forth between the two.
Y/N gave in, sliding the notebook his way and bringing her eyes to the ceiling. She didn’t want to see his reactions quite yet to her quick writing. She’d had only an hour to start scribbling, so she wasn’t convinced that it would drop jaws. Her internal monologue was stopped by her eyes when they looked over and saw Luke’s wide smile as he ran his eyes down the paper. She let them linger there for a while, taking in his animated expression. He looked up at her for a moment, the smile staying put before he darted back down to her words. He pointed to a specific spot on the page and brought his gaze back up to her again.
“I'm on my guard for the rest of the world, But with you, I know its no good.” He sang quietly, his eyes fixated on her face. He spun around in his chair before he opened his mouth again.
“Y/N, this is so good. This...is music. At least to me. I can hear this.”
She knew her face was a perfect shade of pink by now, but she tried to ignore her elevated heart rate as she asked him a question. “You, you mean that?”
He nodded “You have to sing this with me.”
She shook her head profusely “Luke, oh no, absolutely not.”
He giggled, touching her hand again. “Come on Y/N. My house isn’t far from here and I’m off in 10 minutes. It could be as private as you need it to be.”
She thought about her former voice lessons, her years of choir and her short time in the drama department. She wasn’t a terrible singer. For some reason, the mixture of her finally being able to put something on paper and the way Luke was looking at her right now made her want to say yes, so she did.
She finally nodded his way, whispering a quick “....okay.”
Luke’s smile grew as he stood from the table, “Wait for me here, I’ll be done in a few.”
She spent the last 10 minutes painstakingly over-analyzing every single possible situation that may come from this encounter. She was about to be alone, with a boy she’s met all of two times, giving one of the most vulnerable parts of her to him. What if he hated it and never wanted to see her again. Did she want to see him again?
What was happening to her? She tried to focus on the lyrics/poem or whatever she’d written. She started to hum along to a line to calm herself down as she waited for Luke to finish. As soon as she’d hit her second stanza, a hand touched her shoulder.
“Let’s get out of here.” He said, pulling on his coat.
She got up out of her seat, placing her notebook in her bag and throwing her coat over her body. She followed him out the door into the cold autumnal air. He turned to her, pointing to the left side of the lot.
“Ride with me? I’ll bring you back to your car later.” She nodded at him, following him across the street.
As she got into the passenger side seat, the smell that wrapped around her felt familiar. It smelled like him, like dark woods and coffee mixed together. She took a silent breath in, exhaling as he got in next to her.
“You okay?” He asked, putting on his seatbelt.
“Just preparing for my 9 p.m. news abduction story.” She said, grabbing onto the handle near her chair.
He pursed his lips together, obviously holding in laughter as he put the car in drive. He pulled out of the lot and onto the road quickly. As they moved past homes and office buildings, Y/N brought her attention out toward the window. She listened to Luke’s light humming as she took in what passed them by.
He turned onto a street lined in trees that were shedding their summer green. She almost wanted to take a shot of the leaves, but she didn’t want to feel invasive. Instead, she mentally took note of their beauty, something she’d hope to at least get to write about later.
Luke hopped out of the car quickly, lightly jogging her side to open the door. “Ma lady,” he slightly bowed at her and she rolled her eyes, stepping out of the car.
He walked next to her toward the wooden door with a large wreath hanging upon it. Shades of yellow and orange and green sprinkled around it. He put the key in the door and guided her inside. The place was quiet. Table set, rooms clean but no sight of anyone around the first floor.
“Where’s your family?” She asked.
He held his hand out to take her coat. “Dunno, probably at one of our relative’s houses. It’s poker night.” She shrugged off her jacket, placing it in his palm.
He pointed at the stairs “Let’s go to my room.” She followed his lead up the winding stairs. He moved toward the door straight in front of them and spun the handle open. He gestured her in first, and her eyes met walls of musical artists and ticket stubs. She turned in a circle, taking all of it in.
“Pretty sweet, huh?”
She smiled at him “Quite a collection you’ve got.” He held her gaze for a moment before walking over to his guitar stand.
“Here’s my baby, let’s get to singing!” He ran his fingers down the strings once before sitting back on his bed, tapping the spot next to him for her.
She moved slowly, sliding next to him and leaning back on the wall. She handed him her notebook and he strummed away as he looked at their combined words. Y/N watched him in awe as he combined words and melody in front of her. Her eyes fixed on his closed expression, shaking his head enthusiastically to the notes he played.
He smiled back at her, laying out some poorly drawn notes on paper in front of them. “Okay, so I already had something in mind for this piece. Let me know if you need any help as we go through this.”
He started to play the opening notes, leading up to the first verse she came up with. He hummed his thoughts on the first stanza, and then looked at her, nodded her along. She tried to avoid looking at her shaking hands as she quietly repeated that first line. His warm grin boosted her confidence, next coming in stronger and the following even brighter than before.
As they hit the chorus he counted down from three for her and then they sang together. “ Drop everything now, meet me in the pouring rain, kiss me on the sidewalk take away the pain 'Cause I see, sparks fly, whenever you smile.” His velvet voice eased her worries as they continued down the page, eye contact staying consistent.
By the time they got to the end, Y/N and Luke were simply looking at each other as his playing faded out into the background. His gaze always made her a bit on edge, but the way he looked at her right now, with that dreamlike trance, was enough to make her feel like the room was spinning. She finally diverted her gaze from his to look out his window and she heard him exhale.
“You okay?”
“Yeah.” She said lazily, letting her eyes slowly migrate back to the bedframe he laid against. He set his guitar to the side and moved over to the edge of the bed near her. She watched as he slid his hand closer to her, inching it toward her own. When he finally closed in, his grip was soft and gentle, bringing his fingers between hers. She looked up to meet his eyes, trying to dissect what he was doing.
She watched as his body leaned in toward hers. She felt her breath hitch at the proximity. Finally letting her gaze meet his. She watched as his gaze moved from her lips to her eyes a few times before he closed the distance, hand reaching for her neck. She shut her eyes, leaning into him as their lips moved together. As they pulled away, his dark eyes glistened at her.
“Like music.” He repeated, touching her cheek gently.
.
.
.
.
Tag list: @xplrreylo @lovesanimals, @anythingandeverythingfandom, @crybabyddl, @oswin05, @themaddies-obx, @lukeys-giggle, @bumbleberry-pie @kiss-themoongoodbye @marinettepotterandplagg, @lolychu, @bathtimejish, @dasexydevitt13 @musicconversedance, @txrii @bestdressedandstressed @daisiesforlacey @epikskool @bookfrog247 @carleywhittaker @princessvader15 @rudysbay @spooky-season-bitch @kcd15 @whatever-happens-imma-stand-tall
#luke patterson#luke patterson x reader#luke patterson fanfiction#luke patterson imagine#jatp#julie and the phantoms#julie and the phantoms fanfiction
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“I like you too idiot.”- Connor Murphy X Reader
Request: can u do a connor x reader where reader is being pretty annoyed with Jared on the first day (like when he calls him a school shooter) and he steps in and defends her leading timo a nice friendship and a love confession from Connor at the end? I’m sending love, and if u can’t it is really ok, everyone’s mental health is important, pls don’t feel overwhelmed 💕✨🦋- Anon
Word Count: 2,542
Warnings: A couple swears and Jared Klienman being a dick. (also Connor is probs written ooc but whatever)
Authors note: Hi everyone! First of all I just want to say thank you to everyone who requested something! I am trying to work on them but I recently fell into a really bad place mentally but I’m working on making it better. I hope to have the other requests out soon but please be patient with me. Also anon I used they/them pronouns for the reader as those are my pronouns and I want to make sure everyone can I enjoy my writing regardless of gender so I hope that okay. As always thank you for reading and I hope you have a good day/night! :) <3 (Also any feedback is very appreciated. )
First day of senior year. To say you weren’t excited would be the understatement of the century. Sure you were excited to finally get out of your hometown but you had to get through the school year first and if the previous years were any indication of how this year was going to go, well lets just say it's going to be a long year.
You pulled into the student parking lot in your shitty car and saw there were a couple extra minutes before you actually had to be in the building, With that in mind you decided to just put your head down on the steering wheel for a few minutes to prepare yourself for the day ahead.
That peace was short lived though because not even 30 seconds later did a dark truck pulled up next to you. Before the car could even come to a stop Zoe Murphy flew out of the passenger seat. She flipped off the driver, who you presumed was her brother Connor, and slammed the door before storming off into the school. “Jesus” you mutter to yourself. Then another door slammed and Connor Murphy appeared in front of the truck, talking and gesturing wildly to himself. You could only make out bits and pieces of what the boy was saying before he went into the school like his sister. You heard him say something about his mom and his bitch sister and not even wanting to be there. Well at least you weren't alone in the feeling. Following the Murphy siblings you begrudgingly went into the building. The friendly secretary greated you and handed you your schedule which had your locker number on it. After searching for a few minutes you found it and just as you were starting to put things in your locker you heard his voice, Jared Klienman. He was talking to Evan Hansen and you prayed to whatever higher being that could hear you that he would leave you alone. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case.
“Well, well, well if it isn’t L/N.” You could practically hear the shit-eating grin he had on his stupid face. You were about to turn around and tell him to go away but before you could someone comes between the two of you blocking Jared from your view.
“Fuck off Klienman” says the last person you expected, Connor Murphy.
“Woah calm down Murphy, I’m just trying to have a conversation with Y/N here” Jared says starting to back up and putting his arms up as a way of showing his surrender.
“Well they obviously don’t want to talk to you. Now get out of here before I punch that stupid smirk off your dumb face,” Connor says squaring off his shoulders in an attempt to look even more intimidating than usual. It worked quite well because Jared was practically running off but not before making a dig at Connor.
“Yeah whatever you fucking freak.”
You saw Connor’s shoulders tense and his hands clenched into fists. You didn’t know what to do but figured it would be best to leave the boy alone, so you just fidgeted with your hands. He took a deep breath then turned to face you.
“Uhm thanks for that. You really didn’t have to,” you say avoiding eye contact with him, which was quite easy considering how tall he was compared to you.
“No problem, I know how much of a dick Klienman can be.”
“Yeah he’s the worst,” you say scoffing lightly. Then the bell signaling you were supposed to be in homeroom rang.“See you around Connor. Thanks again,” you say before turning to shut your locker and rush to class.
“Yeah see you around,” Connor says to no one because you were already down the hall.
The rest of the day wasn’t much better, nothing happened in particular but it just still wasn’t the best. After what felt like an eternity it was finally the last bell of the day, creative writing. You weren’t particularly interested in writing but you had a bell to fill so you figured why not. When you walked in you did a scan of the room and saw Connor, he had an empty seat next to him at the back of the room so you decided to sit it in. “Hey,” you say, startling the boy who was previously staring into space.
“Oh hey.”
“Thanks again for this morning, I really appreciate it dude,” you say making eye contact with Connor so he would know you actually meant what you were saying.
“Oh yeah, it was nothing. Don’t worry about it,” he says, giving you a small smile. You smiled back just as your teacher walked in which caused the conversation to end.
“Good afternoon class! I hope all of your days have been tolerable,” says your teacher Mr. Davidson. He was a younger man in his early 30’s which meant everyone liked him including you. “Instead of doing an ice breaker where you all lie about how interesting your summers were I want you to get to actually get to know someone in this class a little better,” he says from behind his podium at the front of the class. You were starting to panic a little, who were you going to partner up with? None of your kind of friends were in this class! Then Connor cleared his throat grabbing your attention.
“Hey Y/N, wanna be partners?” The nervous energy was practically radiating off the boy. You breathed a sigh of relief.
“Sure Connor.” The two of you then got up and turned your desks to face each other like the other pairs were doing. “So Murphy what’s your deepest darkest secret?” you say, smirking.
“Woah L/N, not even going to ask me my favorite color or anything?” he says chuckling.
“Okay, okay, fine,” you say playfully rolling your eyes. “What’s your favorite color Connor?”
“Dark green. What about you L/N? What's your favorite color?”
“Y/F/C,” you say. “It’s been my favorite since I was younger,” you say shrugging.
“I respect that. It’s a good color.”
“Yeah whatever, now can I hear your deepest secret?”, you say almost like a child.
“Wow you’re still on this?”, he says with amusement evident in his tone.
“Yeah I am!” you say in a mock seriousness. “Mr. Davidson says we are supposed to actually get to know each other and that’s what I’m trying to do Murphy!”
“You’re absolutely right Y/N,” he says suddenly very serious.
“Okay fine I’ll tell you but you have to swear you won’t tell anyone.
“Not a soul,” you say staring at him intently and sitting at the edge of your seat.
“Well, here goes nothing.” He made eye contact and it felt as if he was staring into your soul. “I’m pregnant.”
You maintained eye contact until you actually processed what he said, then the two of you started laughing which caused the rest of the class to turn and look at you but for once you didn’t even care because you were actually happy for the first time in what felt like forever.
The rest of the class went by faster than you or Connor wanted it to, but the two of you walked out to the student parking lot together and paused when you reached your cars. “Uh see you tomorrow I guess,” you say but it comes out as more of a question.
“Yeah see you tomorrow Y/N”, Connor says very confidently which surprised you both. You waved as a final goodbye and got into your cars. As you were driving home you thought about all the awful things you heard about Connor in the past and how untrue they were. Sure he was intimidating at first glance but he’s six feet tall for goodness sake who wouldn’t be intimidated by that. You could tell from the short class period you spent getting to know him that he was simply misunderstood. Suddenly you were glad you never listened to what all the popular kids said about Connor.
As the school year went on you and Connor developed a sort of unspoken ritual, you would wait for Connor to get to school then you two would walk to homeroom together and then walk to your cars when the school day was over. The two of you became good friends and you found yourself actually looking forward to waking up in the morning so you could see him. The pair of you had hung out outside of school a few times and you had actually met Connor’s mom, granted it was an accident but it still happened.
You and Connor decided to hang out at his house because his family wasn’t home that afternoon, the two of you were lounging on the couch watching some weird movie when you heard the front door open. “Connor dear? Is that you in there?” Suddenly an middle aged woman with red hair appeared with reusable grocery bags in her hands.
“Mom?!” Connor jumped up from the couch in a panic. “I thought you had yoga today?!”
“Class was canceled because Cindy wasn’t feeling well. Oh I stopped by the store and got those snacks you asked for!” she said coming into the living room box in hand. “Oh? Connor, who's your friend?” she said with a small smile appearing on her lips.
“Hi Mrs. Murphy. I’m Y/N,” you said nervously.
“Oh call me Cynthia dear,” she said, shooting you a smile.
After that Cynthia invited you to stay for dinner but you already had plans with your parents that night. She invited you a couple times after that as well. You never actually went cause Connor didn’t want you to but still it was nice to know she liked you enough to invite you to dinner.
As fall came to a close the two of you became attached at the hip, constantly talking to one another whether it was in person or through the phone. Once the holiday season rolled around you guys got each other gifts. You got Connor a signed book from his favorite author and he got you a vinyl you had been wanting for a while.
Once the holiday break was over the end of the first semester came quickly and you couldn’t wait to finally be done with your half year courses and start the new ones. Unfortunately you had to take finals before you could be done. Although you only had two finals you were still extremely stressed out. Sure they were easy classes but the teachers were notorious for giving impossible finals. You spent the few days before the finals studying whenever there was a free moment. Connor knew you were stressed so he helped you the best he could. He offered to have study sessions even though none of his classes had finals, he went over quizlets on video calls, and he even brought you a drink with way too much caffeine on the mornings he knew you didn’t sleep.
Once the day arrived he texted you good luck. You went into the first test and totally nailed it. Before the next testing time there was a break and when you checked your phone you saw Connor had texted you telling you how proud he was of you for studying so hard and reassuring you that you had these exams in the bag. You sent him a quick “thank you :))” and went into the testing room for the second time. This exam was a little harder than the last but you still thought you did decent. There were a couple times where Connor and his stupid mneumonic devices actually came in handy. Letting out a giant breath of relief as you stepped out of the testing room you couldn’t wait to tell Connor about how much he helped. When you reached your locker and got your phone out of it you saw Connor had asked if you wanted to hang out when you were done. Obviously you said yes and told him to pick you up at your house in 15. You drove home and changed out of your testing outfit which was just sweatpants and a hoodie and put on something a little more presentable. Sure you were just going to hang out with your best friend but he also is the boy you’ve been pining over for months. You’ve always found Connor attractive and when he put dickhead Klienman in his place that made him all the more hot. But then you really got to know him and you fell. Hard. He was sweet, caring, smart, and funny. Sure he had his moments but so did everyone on the planet. He had actually opened up to you about his struggles with his mental health and you did everything you could to support him. You encouraged him to ask his parents for therapy, and always made sure he took his meds in the morning. You were there for him and he was always there for you.
You were pulled out of your thoughts when you heard the horn of Connor’s truck outside your house. You rushed outside and got into the passenger seat, “So where to Murphy?”
“I was thinking we could get some food and just chill in a parking lot somewhere. Sound cool?”
“Definitely. I’ve missed hanging out with you. Stupid finals,” you say with a dramatic eye roll.
“Yeah I’ve missed hanging out with you too dork,” he says reaching over the center console and ruffling your hair.
“Connor Murphy! I just brushed my hair and here you go messing it up!” you say while trying to fix your now disbelieved hair.
“Whatever L/N. It still looks fine to me.” Although it was barely a compliment, heat still rushed to your cheeks. He pulled out of your driveway and the two of you were off. On the way to get food you guys caught up talking about everything you missed in the world of Connor because you were too focused on finals. He told you he finished a TV show you recommend and loved it. You made it to the drive through and Connor ordered, already knowing what you wanted from your many midnight outings. Once you got your food you made your way to the plaza parking lot where the restaurant was located. For the first couple minutes the two of you sat in a comfortable silence listening to the playlist Connor had made for this type of occasion. After a few minutes Connor suddenly spoke, “Can I tell you something?”
“Connor dearest you know you can tell me anything,” you say with a french fry in your mouth, not even bothering to look at him.
“I like you.” You choked on the fry you had in your mouth.
“Pardon?” you say through a cough.
“I said I like you,” he says, a little less sure of himself. When you looked over at Connor you saw he was staring straight ahead.
“Hey Connor.”
“Mhm,” he says, not daring to move.
“Look at me.” He just barely turned his head towards you. “I like you too idiot.”
#connor murphy#Connor Murphy x Reader#connor murphy fanfiction#connor murphy x you#connor murphy fanfic#x reader#Broadway#dear evan hansen#Cynthia Murphy#zoe murphy#jared klienman#evan hansen#dear evan hansen fanfic#dear evan hansen x reader#dear evan hansen x you#broadway x reader#broadway fanfic#Character x Reader
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snezhnaya does not believe in broken hearts > childe
→ pov: there is no pov i’m in love with another fictional man. I’m a little rusty writing wise because of school, but someone said childe enemies to lovers and who i am i to say no to that 🥴 so, here’s his boss battle with a ✨twist✨
→ ib: this comic on twt, pls go support it i love it and cry whenever someone mentions it. also, like the comic, childe’s delusion form won’t have a mask just so it’s easier to write his expressions!
→ *there are a good amount of lines that are taken directly from his battle in the game, so beware of detailed spoilers!
You can trust him. But, don’t get too involved. The battle he pursues is dangerous; it’s not something a normal person can withstand.
Whether you realised it or not, every moment you had spent with him began to carve out a hole in your chest, bittersweetly wearing away every layer of protection you had unconsciously built up. It wasn’t a well-done job by any means; the edges it left were particularly jagged, but the softness Childe still managed to pull from them left you stunned every time it chose to peek its head out.
“Don’t be so on edge, we’re friends, aren’t we?”
It suddenly became a daily routine to expect him at some point, whether it entailed him coming upon you doing a commission in the middle of the mountains, or you crossing paths in Liyue while some type of street food balanced precariously in his grip.
Yet, what you failed to notice was that most times, he would take care to place another of the same delicacy into your hand, as if expecting to see you. Childe would meet you in the middle of the mountains not by chance, but rather by a sense of curious boredom, wherein your company was the only suitable way to pass the time.
Subsequently, the only question remaining in a scenario such as this, was what the other meant to each of them — were you truly able to push your obligations aside, or were you only getting close enough to have enough leverage to strike?
On any occasion a disarming laugh left his mouth, or he lent you his support without question, you failed to remember that you were pitched as enemies in the first place. You inevitably no longer felt the same wariness towards the harbinger over time, but it only made you that much more guilty to know just how easily you had begun to trust him.
Yet no matter the hopeful sentiments your sputtering heart provided you, you knew one thing to be true that would always remain so: you would never be on the same side.
“You’ve already fulfilled your task as guide, so why do you still linger here? Haven’t you already seen enough trouble for today?”
You had entered the Golden House apprehensively, perhaps hoping even over the Exuvia’s safety that you wouldn’t meet him there. But coming upon it and hearing the one voice you had been dreading, you begrudgingly came to terms with the fact that you would have to face reality eventually.
“Huh?” Paimon is startled by the sudden disembodied voice. “Who’s there?!”
Childe reveals himself by coming up the stairs you had just now ascended, his saunter maddeningly casual. “If you were Fatui, I imagine that you would be entitled to a generous reward from the Tsaritsa yourself.”
The way he tilts his head with such fake amiability grates across you like nails on a chalkboard. “But now you’re nothing but dross -- and you’re in my way.”
“It looks like I was just in time, then.”
Childe laughs. “Although I’m deeply grateful to you for helping me so effortlessly find this secret location… don’t you think that trying to stop me now would only be a wasted effort?”
“Stopping the mora mints, hiding away the Exuvia,” He laughs again, and your hand instinctively makes a small stretch for your weapon. “And sending you. The Qixing are really pulling out all the stops this time.”
“So you were planning to take the gnosis all along?” You ask flatly, your words swallowed by your own hesitation just after you’d barely gotten out the last word. Even though this mishap wasn’t very detectable, shame burns the back of your throat at the honesty of the reflex.
“As one of the Eleven Fatui Harbingers, it’s my duty to see the will of the Tsaritsa fulfilled. And she will get which she desires.”
You shake your head, fully grounding your hand and preparing to draw your sword. “Not if I don’t allow you to get near the Exuvia.”
“I’m not looking for your blessing, ___.” Childe narrows his eyes and takes note of this action, the implications of it drawing up a wanton sense of disappointment he had long been expecting. This varies little from your own dismay, unbeknownst to him. “There’s nothing you could do to stop me anyways.”
“The time for discussion and diplomacy has already long passed. I mean, if it were up to me, I would have skipped that stage to begin with… but, I’m willing to do as the Tsaritsa deems fit.”
“Either way,” An eyebrow arches as an equally intrigued smile pulls at the corner of his lips. “It seems we’re now coming upon my favourite part -- a simple pleasure, and one that I am oh-so delighted to be sharing with you.”
it’s as if a pin drops, and he grins. “The battle.”
You now stand at a fork. Two paths stare at you with expectant eyes, both equally enticing; but the drawbacks of the indulgent solution unfortunately long outweigh those of their obvious counterpart. It’s a decision that must be made on behalf of Liyue, not the hurt of a single heart.
Paimon scoffs, drawing you from your thoughts. “So you’re the type that goes looking for trouble, huh?”
Childe’s laughter rings out, and he throws his head back as if he had heard something particularly funny. “I guess you could say that!”
“When Signora offended the deities outside of the cathedral in Mondstadt, she swiftly left the scene once her mission was accomplished. Instead of confronting you directly, she chose to rely on the snow and ice to make an escape.”
“I would take that as far more than its face value. When she faces a worthy opponent, she will prioritise her mission, weigh the outcomes, and consider the consequences of her actions…” He explains, trailing off with an inexplicable smile. “But as for me, the greatest pleasure of being a harbinger lies in the opportunities I have to cross blades with such opponents.”
“That doesn’t mean we’ll let what happened in Mondstadt ever happen again.”
“Oh? So you do intend to fight me? Good.” Childe’s excitement baffles you and pumps adrenaline into your veins simultaneously. “I won’t kill you, ___, I’ll just play along. To feel the thrill of battle!”
“Besides,” He puts his hands out in an aimless gesture. “You could never defeat me, not even in your wildest dreams. But hey, try to relish in the fight anyways, because if you ask me… without that, what else is there?”
“I could never defeat you?!” His words get the better of you and you laugh in disbelief. “You’re completely delusional.”
He returns the laugh delightedly, igniting a fire of mixed emotions in your chest. “Fighting talk, I love it! Now, let’s see you live up to it.”
You draw your sword at the drop of his last word, taking a step back in preparation for what was to come. Childe, meanwhile, stands watching you with a brewing sensation of glee.
“This chance isn’t easy to come by, so show me all you’ve got.” Arrows infused with water begin to fly in your direction, though you avoid them in haste. “So very few ever get the chance to square off with a Fatui Harbinger, so come now, amuse me. And don’t you dare disappoint.”
You find yourself gritting your teeth at the arrogant words, taken aback at his challenging tone. “You say your colleague has found me praiseworthy, but tell me to only amuse you? That’s a disappointing downgrade.”
A lapse in the time Childe has to shoot gives you enough time to approach him, throwing out a strike of your sword that he catches with his own weapon moulded by water.
“It’s by no means an insult, ___, I’m merely proposing a challenge.” He looks at the way your blades grit against each other and grins. “And it seems you’ve accepted it.” You jump back with the force of his attack to propel yourself. A barrage of geo-aligned magic is summoned beneath your opponent with a stomp to the marble floor.
However, he sidesteps it in a similar fashion, and through a quick exchange of harsh blows, both of you stand back to scope things out. Still, the one aspect that continues to overshadow the rest of your thoughts is the way that Childe’s personality has changed under the scrutiny of battle.
The playful tone he normally sports is long gone, now replaced with a deeper and more realistic one; perhaps even slightly more menacing. It’s as if he’s been flipped into a completely different person.
He laughs maniacally as he uses his hydro vision to drive waves of water out towards you, fully intent on at least knocking you off your feet. The burst of elemental energy ends when Childe leaps back onto the ground. This gives you the leverage you need to go in with another geo attack, this time catching him off guard and launching him to the side.
Childe coughs at the force of the action, his lips curving up into a smile. “Good! No wonder signora was so wary of you.”
His body is encased in an impenetrable bubble of water in an instant, a flash of deep light lashing out from the centre before revealing Childe once again. His swords of water have since been infused by electro energy, and his clothes are darker -- the most noticeable difference, however, is the Fatui mask that had previously been slung over his hair now laid properly over his face.
“Well, that just means I can go all out! Brace yourself, this is about to get tough…” He takes a few preliminary steps. “Show me what you can do against the might of a Harbinger!”
The strikes do indeed get faster. Childe toughens up against seemingly every one of your attacks, dodging most if not all of with even more ease than before. you grit your teeth as you rush to keep up with the frequent blows thrown at you. But, in a panic and reflexive drawback, you retract your sword and desperately block with your arm instead.
Silence entraps the incredibly large room as your sword clatters noisily to the floor. Both the cloth running up the expanse of your arm and wrist piece are slashed considerably, all to reveal a shallow but long gash.
The sensation of electro wastes little time in taking effect, burning up your arm and inducing an inevitable cry of pain as both of you take a step back. Malleable emotion hangs in the heavy atmosphere, waiting to be addressed or otherwise plucked down from their higher place.
Though, his reaction in that split second shows that he might not be just as lost as you’d thought.
Childe has little courage to speak up on any of these topics, but in whatever way he chooses to ignore the berating voice in his head, he can’t push away the sensation of regret swimming in his chest. Watching your face briefly contort in pain you try so hard to hide, yet standing close and being unable to do anything about it -- it’s more real than any understating word his brain could ever feed him.
“What are you doing just standing there?” You suddenly taunt, your voice slightly hoarse as you turn to hide the blood that seeps into your clothing. “I thought you said that you were going to go all out.”
Childe knows that you're right. He had said that, but what would it mean for him to continue? Brawling with you brought the same drunkening high of adrenaline he’s been chasing since he escaped from the abyss all those years ago-- although hurting you wasn’t any sort of intention he’d ever had.
“...I’m only offering a moment to buffer, but I must say -- you’re not bad. Your swordsmanship is quite impressive.” Childe desperately swallows back anything extra that pops into his head and twirls his electrified staff. Personal desires are the last thing he can afford to pay attention to. “But, that’s about as far as you’ll get.”
You sloppily intercept a rough attack that threatens to send you flying backwards, gritting your teeth as you push back with the force of your Anemo power. It goes well for all but the way your arm begins to falter under the stress. Your head naturally follows your body’s trajectory, yet in your panic, the stroke your toed boot makes across the floor leaves a trail of blistering geo behind.
The elements present react immediately, resulting in a blinding explosion. You’re thrown off too quickly and land unsteadily, pain shooting up your arm as you exhale shakily -- you’d never had the misfortune of experiencing a hydro and electro vision working together before now.
“___, are you okay?” Paimon asks frantically, your tiny hands trying their best to locate the heart of the wound on your injured arm. “That cut looks deep, do you really think it’s a good idea to keep pushing yourself?”
You shake your head in dismissal as your eyes move with the clearing dust. “It’s fine, but my sword--?”
Once the haze disperses, you spot your sword almost instantly -- however, you also find Childe’s staff sticking haphazardly into the marble floor right next to it, its owner nowhere to be found.
A laugh sounds from behind you. “I really didn’t think you had that card hidden up your sleeve!”
Your heart drops into your stomach when you whip around to see Childe standing beside Rex Lapis’ corpse, his grin wide like he’d already won the match between you.
“You were just playing us to get close to the Exuvia!”
“Oh, quiet down. Don’t be so quick to judge. You’ve seen this world, you of all people should know...” Childe steadily gathers a ball of electro energy in his palm, the lightning fusing around his gloved hand before materialising. “That this should have been expected!”
The sound is deafening as Childe forces his hand into the Exuvia, opposing elements colliding and responding in turn. “I’ll be taking Morax’s gnosis now!”
Shockwaves come out like tides as the entire room shakes under the pressure of the single action. You’re quick to shield your injured arm from the battering wind, while Paimon latches onto the ornament covering your elbow.
Yet, much to everyone’s surprise, the hand that emerges and unfolds under the glaring light is very much empty.
Childe is taken aback by the particles of light that float from his gloved hand, laughing in frustration as well as bewilderment. “I see. Well, this is most unexpected.”
He turns to look at you through his mask, taking in the equally as surprised expression that moulds your features. But the detail that begins to surface ignites a different, and entirely real type of irritation in him, is the way that your eyes begin to change.
“Morax’s gnosis is far from another old antique,” Ningguang had prefaced this when you had visited her in the Jade Chamber, her words stable and forward. “It is a sign of Liyue’s reigning power, and also a symbol for the people to look towards; as not only a god, but also the keeper of peace. This is not something that would be hidden carelessly.”
“Many people throughout my years as a Qixing have tried to outsmart the layers close to the gnosis, however, none have succeeded. Its protector is someone of utmost secrecy whose identity I must not reveal, not even to you.”
She had sighed, placing a warm yet distant smile on her face. “But, I believe this method will continue to deter unwanted hands, along with you in their capable stead.”
Your eyes widen as you take an instinctual step back. You’d found it nearly impossible when tasked with feeding the Harbinger outdated details, though your heart feels heavy in realising that it had gone to show how much Childe truly did learn to trust you.
But, it had worked, hadn’t it? Because of this, the exuvia was somewhere far away -- in capable hands, as Ningguang had phrased it. Yet you feel little want to celebrate this small victory, immediately reminded of the situation it’s caused as Childe’s vision flares up around him, warping his figure in your eyes.
“You… You beat me to it, didn’t you?” Childe doesn’t miss your sense of victory being quickly replaced by fear, but in a fit of irritation, he takes no time in disregarding it.
He leaps haphazardly into the centre of the room, forcing you to careen out of the way as his electro vision fries the air around you. It becomes stuffy and unbearably hot in the enclosed space entirely too quickly. But, throughout the sudden drastic change in their atmosphere, you can’t help but notice the second transformation that Childe has gone through; yet rather this time, it’s much more drastic.
Once the air dissipates, Childe leaps back to the floor once again, his heavy military boots marking his step indefinitely. The attire he wears is fittingly close to armour -- presenting a deep blue and purple suit that fits like a second skin.
“Not a bad trick,” His spear of water that had since been lodged in the marble floor flies into his hand, twirling to rest on his shoulder as his voice stabilises. “But, this is going to cost you!”
The same weapon is pushed into the ground with overflowing destructive power. It quickly runs veins out like web beneath your feet, electro charge roughly and abruptly breaking the floor to reveal another space below.
You're dragged down indiscriminately amongst the falling debris, roughly colliding with the sharp edges before hitting the ground once again. Your arm, still slightly bleeding and swollen, screams at the harsh impact. Though having landed on your stomach meant that other parts of your body had absorbed most of the shock, natural reflexes had forced you to receive some of the heavier damage in your arm regardless.
There wasn’t a lot that you could do about this, however, other than pick yourself up again and hope that Childe was still too high up to see your pain clearly. Thankfully, lo and behold, a purple light just then begins to descend almost hauntingly through the smoke. It blinks out briefly before revealing Childe again as every messy part of the room is blown away by an incredible elemental power.
You hold up your uninjured arm to combat against the strong wind, wincing as your body is forced back.
“You got to the gnosis ahead of me, didn’t you?” Childe’s staff finally rests in his hand, however, the aura he gives off alone is enough to make you antsy. “Did you simply move faster? Or… did you leak the information regarding the Golden House to me on purpose?”
“...You’ve outsmarted me, ___. But that doesn’t mean the information won’t be in my hands by the time we’re done.” Another electric current fills the room as he moves to make an attack. “So, fight hard knowing there's something of such value on the line.”
Your eyes flicker around the room for your sword as you say, “How do you know that I have any of the information you need? That’s betting a lot on nothing.”
He laughs, the familiar sound chilling.
“You don’t have to be omnipotent to take a best guess. Besides, I’m confident enough in knowing that you’re smart enough to play me, so a battle between friends to determine that isn’t too much of a stretch, is it?”
You spot the sword and take a hesitant step towards it, attempting to return his words as a distraction. “It’s strange to call me a friend and threaten to put a knife in my chest in the same sentence. I thought you said that you weren’t going to kill me?”
Childe pauses, debating his next words carefully. “...Conditions are ever-changing.”
“If they were going to change so drastically, you should have told me earlier. Maybe then I could’ve figured out how to explain something I don’t know the answer to.”
“Don’t play dumb with me, ___.” His delusion’s deeper tone makes even the most playful of his words sound threatening. You stand your ground, though, knowing that no matter what your apprehension presents, nothing will change the fact that your weapon is only a mere step away.
“I know that you can tell me.”
You know I can? The supposedly comforting statement bounces around in your head, creating a ringing in your ears and a painful drumming against your temples. It’s not that simple, you think. There's little he wouldn’t be able to get from you if gone about the right way, however, as long as the information remained important, it would stay unattainable to even him.
You grit your teeth, feet twisting boldly into a position that’ll make it easier to leap in the direction you need. “I won’t tell you anything,” The leap is short and filled with almost too much strength, but you make up for any shortcomings by turning to block the incredibly close blow Childe had thrust out to stop you.
You push your sword against his with the force of all of your irritation, jaw clenched as your words come out in a single breath. “Because I know that I don’t have anything to say to the person that betrayed me.”
Unsurprisingly, words like those are some of the last that Childe wants to hear at that moment. No amount of guilt tripping or humiliation was typically enough to get to him, however, your simple declaration hits him in a spot that he’s long tried to bury.
Childe scoffs, pretending that he hadn’t blatantly hesitated. “You’re not fit to be here if you’re shaken by the betrayal of someone like me. Take it from me and give up while you’re ahead.”
You’re stunned by Childe’s brutal words for a brief moment, leaving him an important window to more easily knock your weapon away, out of your weakened hands. His blade meets your throat with little hesitation, the cool water stinging against your overheated skin.
Childe’s eyes wander to the way your body turns slightly to protect your injured arm, and disregarding the way his stomach twists, he shakes his head. “What’s wrong, ___? The way you are now won’t be able to defeat me.”
He looks at the way you hesitate and the already putrid feeling in his gut turns rotting. You make no more effort to fight back despite your strength, nor move the weapon lying firmly right over one of your weakest points.
“I might end up killing you if you don’t tell me where the gnosis is.” Childe tries to push you further, but is taken aback when your brows knit as if frustrated. You know very well that he’s someone with bad intentions, yet why do you continue to yearn to see the good in him? To see the carefree person you’d known before today?
You don’t respond, unmoving beneath his heavy gaze for all but the way your hands begin to slowly hover up towards the sword pressuring your neck.
Why can’t you stop?
Your shaking hands take the blade lightly in your grip, the vision-adjacent water searing your battered skin. A droplet of sweat slides down your cheek yet all you can focus on is the way Childe’s eyes instantly delve into panic.
“If you’re going to kill me, you should hurry up and save us both the suffering.”
The sudden powerful statement sounds unreal coming from such a weakened person, blood running down your fingers as you force his sword away.
“What makes you think that your death would cause me any harm?” Childe’s heart thumps wildly beneath his clothes as he lets his weapon be redirectioned, but his brows furrow. “I used you. Do you have yet to realise that?”
“You think I’m so inept that I would believe in someone so fast?” Your fingers go to nestle in the fabric of your skirt, the clothing acting as a temporary shield from the pain. “It was no secret that you weren’t someone to be trusted.”
“Then why lead me here if you’re so confident in yourself? Surely you don’t think that picking a fight with me was a sound idea?”
“You came here yourself. I was never looking to fight.” You mumble truthfully, taking your hand away from your skirt to reveal your palms stained with blood. “...I only said what I did because I don't like hurting those I care about.”
Childe stands paralysed in shock upon hearing such honest words, his mouth opening and closing as he rushes to process their meaning. What could he possibly say to that?
You hadn’t left a single mark on him despite believing that you were fighting for your life, whereas he had prioritised outside matters over listening to his internal backlash -- he had hurt you in a simple twisted warning.
“___, you--”
He’s barely able to get a sentence out before you sigh, going up to him with little hope before wrapping your arms around him.
Childe exhales unsteadily, his weapons then evaporating as his torso and arms instinctively straighten up. Moments of complete stillness go by unhindered. But, you wait patiently for any type of response from the man in your arms.
“...___.” He finally mumbles this from above your head, voice incredibly soft. “What do you think you’re doing?”
You’re at a loss as for how to respond, because truthfully -- the answer is mostly lost even to you. All you can do is drown in the silence that you’ve created, heart picking out the worst parts of the way his posture stays tense.
Childe groans abruptly, his delusion slowly beginning to break down to reveal his normal clothes. “Come on,”
As if something restricting him had suddenly been removed, he staggers and sinks to his knees, body going limp at the sudden lapse in support of his vision. Though fortunately, you follow him even while he goes down.
Your arms struggle to support the sudden weight as his chin lulls forward, colliding with your shoulder just as your knees hit the floor. He’s not entirely weak, you think, noticing the way he purposely tries to shift a lot of pressure off of you. Though you don’t know much about his delusion, it seems viable to assume that the form had just exhausted a decent amount of energy.
You feel the heat of his hands hesitantly coming upon your sides, but much to your disappointment, they quickly retract before he mumbles, “You’re a fool.”
“I know.” You whisper. “But, it’s too late. I can’t give up on you now.”
Childe scoffs, the sound muffled by your shoulder as he brings his arms up around you. He embraces you so tightly that it’s as if you’ve struck something inside him.
Those words are so unfair, they almost give me hope.
#hey I’m only like 75% satisfied with this but content is content baby#genshin impact#genshin impact childe#genshin impact tartaglia#genshin impact x reader#childe x reader#tartaglia x reader#chilumi#yall thought you got rid of me huh#I’m here to spam writings within the next week to the best of my ability and there’s nothing you can do to stop me >:D
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could I req a scenario where it’s ur first time w aomine pls!! xx
Sure!! I hope you like this xx
Scenario: Your first time with Aomine (nsfw)
It had been about a month since you and Aomine had begun dating and things were going rather smoothly. The two of you had been good friends before you started dating so you were able to skip the awkward stage most new relationships struggle with; your conversations weren’t any different now that you were dating, it’s just that there was a lot more touching and physical affection involved. It was still kind of weird getting used to having Aomine wrap his arms around you spontaneously or plant a kiss on your lips out of the blue, but it was always a welcome surprise.
The two of you never really got further than kisses and make out sessions though, however as time went on, it was becoming increasingly obvious that both of you wanted more.
An opportunity finally presented itself when Aomine was home alone one day and called you to come over. You had been texting each other back and forth prior to it and the conversation kept taking very suggestive turns until your boyfriend seemingly got frustrated by the lack of your touch.
When you knocked on Aomine’s front door, you were greeted by the usual, “Hey babe,” and peck on the lips before he welcomed you in.
His bedroom was in its usual state: a mess. With clothes sprawled out on the floor and a variety of magazines ranging from sports-related to gravure, scattered across his desk, his room was just as one would expect it to be.
“Er, sorry about the mess,” he said out of courtesy, though he didn’t seem the slightest bit embarrassed about it
“When is it not a mess?” You said, sarcasm laced in your tone.
“Momoi usually comes over and ends up cleaning. I guess it’s clean then,” he shrugged as he plopped onto his bed with his back resting against the headboard.
You were about to take a seat at the chair by his desk, but Aomine gave you a confused look that made you stop and stare back with an equally confused glare, “What?”
“Why are you sitting there?” he asked as if you did something criminally wrong.
“Is there something wrong with this chair?” you questioned, not putting it past him to have a broken chair in his room.
“No, but come sit with me,” he said, patting down the empty space next to him on the bed.
Sighing and shaking your head at his clinginess, you moved over and climbed onto the bed, leaning against the headboard as your shoulders touched. “Happy now?” you asked sarcastically, your head turning to him with a soft smile on your face.
“Overjoyed,” Aomine returned your sarcasm. “So overjoyed in fact, that I might just kiss you out of sheer joy,” he grinned.
“Well I hope you don’t because I’m saving my first kiss till marriage,” you said, making him chuckle.
“Seems like you’ve already broken that rule so you shouldn’t mind this too much,” he said, playing along before leaning in close. You could feel the smile on his lips as he kissed you, his hand slowly making its way to your waist, which he pulled closer to himself. As your tongues danced with each other’s, Aomine slowly rolled over so that he was laying on top of you, not losing contact with your lips for even a moment.
Aomine’s hips eventually began to move against you as his mouth slowly made its way down to your neck. Your skin was so soft and tasted so sweet that Aomine couldn’t resist nibbling on your neck from time to time, gaining soft groans from you as he continued to leave marks behind. The navy haired boy wanted more though. He wanted to leave marks all over your body. So as he fiddled with the hem of your shirt, he finally stopped his movements and looked at you underneath him with a devious look in his eyes. “Hey, why don’t we go all the way today?” he suggested, voice low and raspy after having kissed you for so long.
You couldn’t help but smile at the sound of those words. “Are you sure? Do you have a condom?”
He reached over to his bedside drawer and picked out a small blue square shaped packet. “Yep, right here,” he said, waving it around.
“Then sure, why not,” you smiled dorkily.
With a wide smile on his face, Aomine reconnected his lips with yours, lingering on them for a while before making his way down your neck again, however he soon pulled your shirt off, gawking at your chest for a bit before he continued to work on leaving more marks along your torso. He finally reached the waistband of your pants when he looked back up at you again.
“Are we really doing this?” he asked, unable to believe that it was actually going to happen, as he became giddy with excitement that was evident with the sparkle in his dark eyes.
Your hand met his cheek, softly caressing it as you nodded lightly, “Yes, let’s do it,” you smiled.
It was your first time with Aomine and you weren’t sure what to expect. As he pulled his shirt off soon after taking off your pants, you couldn’t help but get more excited upon the sight of his toned upper body, which undoubtedly had you holding back drool as he just looked so hot. Aomine seemed to know his way around though, effortlessly pulling clothes off and tossing them to the side until you were both completely naked.
You had to admit, a naked Aomine was definitely a sight to see. Every single part had you swooning over him, and his length was certainly impressive. Aomine seemed to be equally taken aback by your body too though. No matter how many gravure magazines he went through, seeing the real deal right in front of him never failed to leave his mouth hanging.
He quickly snapped out of it though and he began to leave kisses on your inner thigh. As he did so, your fingers began running through his hair absentmindedly, however they quickly gripped onto his short strands when he suddenly licked between your thighs. Flinching slightly at the sudden tug on his hair, he soon began to smirk as his tongue began to lick over, slowly making its way inside you as well. Hearing your gasps and heavy breathing only encouraged him to do it more, but he was also aching to feel you wrapped around him.
Aomine reluctantly pulled away from your body and tore open the plastic packet he’d taken out earlier. After rolling it onto his length, he lined himself between your thighs and looked at you eagerly underneath him.
Your cheeks were still flushed red from his tongue and Aomine seemed to be proud at the sight of it. You still managed to give him a small nod as a way of telling him to continue. So Aomine slowly pushed himself into you, making you flinch from the slight pain you felt of being stretched open. Aomine let out a deep long groan as his length was completely wrapped by your insides. “Fuck,” he muttered under his breath, feeling relieved that he was finally able to do this after he’d been aching for it for a while.
He paused for a moment to let you adjust as he leaned down to kiss you again. “Daiki,” you gasped when he pulled away, “Please move.”
Without hesitation, he did as you asked, slowly beginning to move in and out of you and gaining soft moans from you as he did. “Is this okay?” he asked you after a few moments, wanting to make sure that he wasn’t hurting you. He had a tendency to be quite rough in bed, so he was very cautious since it was only his first time with you.
You nodded, as pain soon subsided and was taken over by pleasure. “F-Faster,” you gasped.
Aomine slowly picked up his pace, though he was still holding back and you could feel it. It was clearly out of concern for you, but little did he know that you too liked it rough.
“Daiki, please go faster,” you begged, your hands gripping onto the bedsheets in desperation as your hips tried to move too in attempt to go faster yourself.
“Are you sure?” Aomine asked, voice soft as he looked at your small squirming body underneath him.
Your eyes stared straight into his with confidence, “I want you to fucking wreck me,” you said, the sound of those words along with the desperate look you gave him sending a wave of excitement throughout Aomine’s body as he became even more turned on.
“Well then, don’t complain when you can’t walk tomorrow,” he smirked before lifting your legs so they were over his shoulders before thrusting into you faster than you could imagine. He somehow managed to go deeper with every thrust, causing the volume of your moans to gradually increase as he went on. Before you knew it, you were screaming so loud that Aomine was sure even the people living three blocks away from him could hear. The navy haired boy pushed his lips against yours to engage you in a sloppy kiss that shut you up. As much as he loved the sound of you screaming for him, he loved feeling you struggle to kiss him back just as much.
After a minute or so of this, he finally pulled away from your lips but also pulled out completely, making you whine at the loss of contact.
Aomine flipped you over so that you were on all fours, with your ass facing him. He slipped inside you once more, making you moan in pleasure of being filled again. He leaned over to your ear and whispered, “I hope you’re still okay, because I’m not gonna go easy on you now.”
You felt shivers run down your spine as a smile spread across your face. “Do your worst,” you challenged, eager to see what Aomine was truly like in bed.
The navy haired boy straightened his back and gripped your hips tightly. Before you knew it, he was slamming into you faster and harder than before, hitting your spot with every thrust. You were once again screaming helplessly in pleasure, making Aomine inch closer and closer to his climax as his movements became sloppier and he began to let out groans of satisfaction.
“D-Daiki, I’m close,” you said breathlessly in between screams and moans.
You felt Aomine’s grip on your hips get tighter. “God you feel so good, Y/N,” he groaned, “I’m close too.”
With a loud moan of his name, you finally reached your high, tightening yourself around Aomine who was finding it increasingly difficult to hold himself together. Soon after you did, he too reached his climax and finally let himself go, feeling nothing but euphoria as he collapsed into his mattress, skin glistening with sweat.
“I didn’t know you liked it that rough, Y/N,” he smirked as the two of you laid in bed, catching your breaths.
“Well, I guess you know now,” you smiled, flustered.
A grin spread across Aomine’s reddened face. He could definitely get used to having more of this.
#kuroko no basket#kurokos basketball#kuroko no basket x reader#aomine daiki#aomine daiki x reader#knb#generation of miracles
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