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pianocat939 · 1 year

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Could we please get more of the yandere rottmnt with a younger sibling reader?

Sure! I've been kinda laughing for a while now over some random shitposting haha.

Tw: mention of murder, overprotective behaviour, controlling behaviour, crack and fluff

Some Hcs with Yandere Turtles with Younger Sibling MC

(MC is a turtle mutant for those who don't know)

✦Ramona✦

As we all know, he's the mama of the group. That solo mission episode where Mikey got babied at times? Yeah take that but amp it up.

He likes to carry you around just so he knows where you are and what you're doing. He especially does this if you're in the Hidden City.

Works together with Mikey and Donnie to have a nutrition management system. Primarily because he has a habit of spoiling you.

Bedtime at 10. No questions asked.

"No, you are not going to stay up until 3 AM giggling at videos on social media. Now, bed."

Asian kids, you know how your mom/dad just walks in and randomly gives you cut-up fruits? That's him. Gives you a hug when he leaves.

You are not allowed to touch hot foods/containers, let big bro handle it.

✦Le' bottomsworth✦

The spoiler/rule breaker brother ig.

You need to buy/get something but aren't allowed to leave? He has you covered, just say the word and he's sassily homosexual walking over there.

Teaches you sword art when you guys are free. Lets you win before going in for the "kill".

If you can't sleep bcs it's too early/insomnia then he'll know. He teleports or pokes a head through and keeps you company.

"Yeah so um. Do you have any dirt on Donnie? I need something good to attack him with."

You guys break rules together. It pisses both Raph and Donnie.

Texts you memes at 3 AM with 13 emojis alongside.

If you ever speak about a friend he'll get jealous real quick. He'll start interrogating you and makes up his mind to frame them somehow.

He teaches you self-defense yet does everything to ensure he does most of the actual fighting. He's not risking it.

✦Da Hermione Granger but in Purple✦

Builds you a protective shell whether you like it or not. You will wear it at all times other than sleeping. Oh did I mention there's a camera on the back side?

I know siblings aren't supposed to have favorites but Donnie will have a personal beef meter with Leo. (Right? I'm an only child so idk)

"I'm the favorite. Why else would they come to me every day? Leo, you stand nothing against me."

Tries to teach you about his tech, not only because it's his special interest but so he can brag he's the better parental-brother (oh and favorites).

Loves playing video games with you.

If he doesn't like certain media on your phone/devices he'll eliminate them. Including some of the memes Leo sent.

Shares his playlist like it's the last thing on earth to do.

If you like an interest in something and he notices it he'll buy/invent stuff.

✦Mi Left Gripper✦

Aww, it's your twin. Welp time to activate clingy af.

He whines if he isn't in the same room as you, to the point Raph and Leo have to pry him off.

Loves cooking your favorite meals! It's his way of showing that he loves you so much and that everybody else should burn away.

Draws you a lot too. If you're an artist he likes exchanging art styles, portraits, anything really.

Freaks the fuck out if sees even the slightest inconvenience in front of you.

"OMIGOSH! YOU STUBBED YOUR TOE! DONNIE, EMERGENCY CALL!"

Do you like fashion? If so, please exchange outfits with him so he can take the clothing to his secret shrine of his adorable twin!

Will jump on top of you to wake you up.

✦All✦

No leaving the lair without a trusted member of the family.

Friends can only be friends after background checks and approval.

Daily head pats are a must.

——————————————————

That was really on crack ok. Do you guys like the names I chose? I used all my brain cells for "Mi Left Gripper".

- Celina

#yandere rottmnt #rottmnt #yandere tmnt #tmnt #rottmnt x reader #tmnt x reader #yandere #yandere x reader #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #tmnt2018 #raph #donnie #leo #mikey

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misty-wisp · 7 months

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(Looks at you with my big eyes) now tell us about Vin

hehe, alrighty!

vin's a chainsaw man oc, but he's got nothing to do with whatever the hell's going on in the actual show or manga. originally, i wrote him for a certain other anime...but i've long since cast away my appreciation for it (it's mid as fuck) (also i have bad memories w/ it). unfortunately though most of my art of him is for that original concept and old as shit so you have masterpieces such as this:

...god, my older art was so bad--

also, for clarity, he does not actually glow in the dark. this is a shitpost.

let me speedrun a quick sketch of what his design is now in good old ms paint:

he's a fiend! (since i know you don't watch/read csm, they're corpses possessed by devils)

he was originally the psychic devil. you know how people get really irrationally scared that someone could be reading their thoughts? yeah, this guy embodies that. he likes to stick around people, posing as human (since the holes on his face are easily hidden behind a mask) and using their thoughts to his advantage to manipulate them to later kill and eat them to survive. "but misty! he's got the classic anime color hair--" shhhh he has albinism

the name "vin" comes from the name of the dead guy he's using the corpse of. he was named vincent, but the devil could only find traces of that name upon taking over his cadaver, so it sticks with the name "vin." since fiends don't physically age afaik, he's eternally in his mid-20s. not much of an issue for him, though.

he's a huge asshole, too. taunting and manipulative, and the type to get on others' nerves for fun. think joshua from twewy. he probably purposefully pisses people off to get them to slip up while completely blinded by frustration, juuust so he could smack em hard enough for an instakill with telekinesis, since he's also capable of that. i can see him getting someone to snap only to dodge a lunge, hop away, and have a piano comedically fall on them before they could turn back to try hitting him again. very unrealistic, probably wouldn't happen, but it would be funny.

he actually does have a silly sad backstory too, regarding how he ended up possessing this dead guy, but i wanna draw him more before going into that...he doesn't even have a proper ref...sobs

#ask #sirenspells #ty for the ask sireeeen <3 #my ocs #oc: vin #misty doodles

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haljathefangirlcat · 1 year

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I don't want to add all of this under the post I took this pic from, because I'm going to get nitpicky and long-winded and it would probably get really annoying for OP... and also because this is the "are you saying we piss on the poor" website, so someone would inevitably think I'm hating on either OP or Mary Reufle. Which I'm not, btw. I think the passage above says something really beautiful and tragic about humanity, and I'm thankful to OP for posting it, otherwise I might have never read it.

But it does remind me of a stupid pet peeve I've been trying to ignore since people on Tumblr started debating whether asexual sailors would be safe from the lure of sirens and other people started replying that, hey! Sirens in Greek mythology, especially the Odyssey, don't lure sailors by offering sex! They lure them by offering them what they desire! Which might be sex for some, but might be just some really great pasta for others!

... again, to avoid another obvious "we piss on the poor" moment: no, I don't actually have anything serious against jokes, thought exercises, and stories in that vein. Ace people belong in fun fantasy and/or mythology-inspired stories and story ideas as much as everyone else. And I'm well-aware you don't need my permission to write about a sailor saving their entire crew by being totally indifferent to sex or almost dooming them because some weird lady on a rock in the middle of the sea was loudly singing about being desperate to share cool frog facts with someone. Hell, I'd probably read both.

But anyway, the pet peeve I was talking about before going on that tangent is that the sirens do sing Odysseus' story to Odysseus, and it just annoys me so much, seeing people ignoring the fact that that's actually a thing that happens. Like, this is from Book XII:

"[...] the Sirens failed not to note the swift ship as it drew near, and they raised their clear-toned song: “‘Come hither, as thou farest, renowned Odysseus, great glory of the Achaeans; [185] stay thy ship that thou mayest listen to the voice of us two. For never yet has any man rowed past this isle in his black ship until he has heard the sweet voice from our lips. Nay, he has joy of it, and goes his way a wiser man. For we know all the toils that in wide Troy [190] the Argives and Trojans endured through the will of the gods, and we know all things that come to pass upon the fruitful earth.’"

... yes, this translation is taken from Perseus and is, unfortunately, in prose. Give me a break, it's not easy to find good poetic translations of the Odyssey posted for free online when I'm not even a native English speaker and to me "Odyssey translation" means "Rosa Calzecchi Onesti's translation from the '60s." The point is, the sirens try to lure Odysseus (and would definitely succeed, if not for the ropes-and-wax trick) by telling him that they know everything, including all that has happened to Odysseus himself and everyone else who suffered through the war of Troy.

And yeah, you could argue that the main draw for Odysseus (his greatest desire, to tie it all back to mythological shitposting) is knowledge itself, because he is that kind of guy. But the sirens don't give any details on their knowledge of all that is presently happening "upon the fruitful earth." They do, however, give details on their knowledge of the past -- specifically stating they know Odysseus' past. The same man who, if you remember, can't take Demodocus singing about a couple of episodes from the war of Troy without needing to hide his face due to being completely overcome by tears, yet has a piece of meat from his own plate brought to Demodocus as a show of respect and gratitude for his singing. Unlike his own wife, Penelope, who when hearing the aoidos Phemius singing about the same war back in Ithaca, asks him to change the subject to something less painful...

It's just. It's so painful and complex and wonderful and it makes me want to tear my hair out every time I think about it. And nobody ever remembers it when someone brings up the sirens and specifically the ones from the Odyssey! *screams*

Btw, now that I've had my nice little rant, please do me a favor and listen to the song Le Sirene by Vinicio Capossela. Because this Italian singer and composer? He gets it.

Here's a rough translation of the lyrics:

The sirens

Tell you about yourself

What you were

As if it were forever

The sirens

Have no tail nor feathers

They only sing about you

The man of yesterday

The man you were, two steps from the sky

All your life before you

All your life as a whole

They say, stop here

The sirens

Assault you at night

Created by the night

They kept all the faces you loved and now

The sirens have them

They sing them to you in a chorus

And you're not alone anymore

They know everything about you

And the best of you

It's a song of sirens

And you hear it in the regret

Of what you lacked

What you glimpsed and won't have

They give it to you

Only in song

They sing to you of how you came from nothing

And nothing you will be

The sirens are a night of beer

And the dawn won't come anymore

They're street ghosts coming in in gusts

They have the voices of sirens

Fill your ears with wax

To not hear them when it's evening

To stay firm

Tied to your routine

But if you listen to the sirens

You won't come home

Because home is

Where they sing about you

Listen to the sirens

They won't stop their singing

In the endless wake, they sing

All your life

Who you were, who you were, who you were

Who you were, who you were, who you are

Mnemosyne

Why go on until old age

Until you feel ill?

It's all already here

Stop here

You don't have anywhere to go anymore

The sirens

Don't sing the future

They give you what has been

But time isn't kind

And if you stop and listen to them

You'll let yourself die

Because the singing is neverending

And it's full of deceit

And takes your life from you

As it sings it

youtube

... also, if you know Italian or you don't mind running lyrics through an online translator (not Google Translate, pls, they don't deserve to be butchered like that) or you're just looking for new music to listen to, do yourself a favor and go listen to Capossela's other Odyssey-inspired songs from the album Marinai, Profeti e Balene. They are:

La lancia del Pelide (The spear of Pelides, and yeah, this one is actually about the Iliad)

Le Pleiadi (The Pleiades, from the POVs of Odysseus and Penelope, and a much deeper and more fascinating take on their relationship than either "Odysseus is a jerk who doesn't care about her because he has sex with other women" or "he's cool, she's cool, they're a cool power couple" could ever hope to be -- even though I do love the latter a lot, admittedly)

Aedo (Aoidos, set in the aftermath of Odysseus' killing of the suitors)

Calipso (Calypso)

Dimmi Tiresia (Tell me, Tiresias, set in Book XI, when Odysseus summons the spirit of the dead seer and receives a prophecy from him)

Nostos (Actually about the tale of Ulysses' final "mad flight" and death in the Divine Comedy, Inferno, Canto XXVI -- yes, you need to listen to this one, too)

... okay, yes, this post did turn into Vinicio Capossela shilling. I swear it wasn't the initial intention, it just happened. But you know what? I don't even care because most of the songs that make Tumblr users go "OMG THIS MAKES ME FEEL SOO UNHINGED 😭 TOTALLY FERAL 😭😭 WHY DOES IT GO SO HARD 😭😭😭" don't go even half as unnecessarily hard as the lyrics to Aedo and Nostos. So, yeah. You can thank me after lying on the floor like "head full. way too many thoughts" for an hour or two.

#long post #greek mythology #the odyssey #odysseus #sirens

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soranis-sunshadow · 3 years

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The anatomy of a horde clone’s eye

I’ve been working on trying to paint a horde clone in a more realistic style and while trying to figure out how to draw the eye and looking through numerous references I came up with a few ideas.

Huge nerd that I am – I have tried to explain the anatomy of the horde clones’ eyes in a way that makes sense.

This is aside from the fourth wall explanation on why Horde Prime has pupils and his little brothers don’t.

This is what I’ve come up with so far:

Lets describe the most generic clone eyes. (with examples)

- Manicure clone here before possession has dull, faintly glowing, green eyes. They don’t illuminate the eye socket or his cheek – the green glow is faint.

Grumpy patrol Hordak

The eyes are just as faint here. The glow does not illuminate the inside of the eye socket at all.

The clone’s eyes appear like this when they are in their default state - as blank and un-emotive as a Prime pleasing little brother can be without being freshly erased.

(like these two bored boys )

Now, when they are emoting strongly, the eyes glow brighter - even while green.

These boys are so happy to chant to Prime’s glory and mercy. The ritual of purification is a spiritual moment for them of deep significance and as such, with their intense emotions come intensely glowing eyes.

Hordak too manifests in a similar fashion although, while alone on Etheria, he is not as Prime-pleaslingly unemotional as his kindred. He has feelings and, despite his effort to maintain a blank affect, he is actually quite expressive and emotive (for his kind).

His eyes glow, at all times, a bit brighter than the standard little brothers’ in their default state.

He is also way more expressive.

Keeping this in mind, his eyes appear to glow brighter when experiencing intense emotion.

Pissed:

Even more pissed.

They glow so brightly here that they reflect the red light all over his brow ridge, nose bridge and cheek. In both of these instances he is intensely enraged.

Here too…

It happens with other emotions too:

(unpleasantly) surprised for example

While feeling betrayal and grief

Mourning and loss…

Intense self-loathing

A perfect, pure, little bother is blank and feels nothing at all. The eyes are white, empty (just like their heads)

The other instances when a clone’s eyes glow is while possessed by Horde Prime

This happens to Horde Prime too. (during possession ore retrieving memories from another clone)

We can see that during possession, their eyes glow stronger from the inside and the light escapes through the pupil.

Throughout the show, the only spacebat whose eyes don’t glow unless he’s accessing his brothers for memory retrieval or possession is Horde Prim. His pupils are slit, like that of a cat while relaxed.

They dilate when excited.

And contract with fear.

Or surprise

The reason we don’t see the iris is because it’s the size of the palpebral fissure. (Just like in cats or dogs)

The iris being relatively opaque to light doesn’t let light shine through normally. The pupil however is transparent and it allows us to see the inside of the eyeball – glowing brightly. Just like in the case of a cat eye. When you shine light into a kitty’s face, the tapetum lucidum – that lines the inside of a cat’s eye and acts like a mirror - reflects the light back out of the eye- through the pupil.

(cat possessed by Horde Prime)

Good boy Prime.

Hell, even human eyes glow back in the light to some extent (if the camera is annoying enough)

You can see the inside of the eye here – it’s red in humans because our inner lining of the retina does not refract light the same way as it does for nocturnal predators so all that is visible is the red, irrigated by red blood – retina.

I’ve tried to find other examples of glowing eyes in a species – not an individual

1) Night elves (WoW) also have glowing eyes that glow from inside but they have a visible iris – unlike the horde clones.

2) Draenei (also Wow) have glowing eyes

(Prophet Velen)

While not close to the draenei in question, their glowing eyes appear blank too – pupilless

3)Protoss (starcraft) Glowing “blank” eyes

Close up (a visible pupil in the glowing eye)

4) The best reference I’ve found was this Dark Dragon Eye stock photo (source)

I hope this can serve as a reference for anyone interested in drawing them in a less cartoony way.

As an aside, I tried to draw Hordak’s eyes (all-be-it as a bit of a shitpost) in an anime style

But, fabulous eyelashes aside, this could sort - of work.

EDIT: in the end, I came up with this

#horde clones #hordak #horde prime #horde clone biology #spop meta

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keepcopinghoe · 3 years

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catch up pt.1

quick rundown of what’s been going on with me

ramo is the first guy that i’ve consistently and personally interacted with since about 2018 and definitely the first guy who actually around my age that i’ve formed a relatively close bond with. i think it’s for this reason that i’m so attached to him. he frequently described himself as an incel (ironically tho) and i think his last actually non-paid-for sexual relationship was back in 2017. so i stupidly assumed that i was the only girl in his life that he was actually close with and this delusion i think in many ways also is what build the foundation behind the inexplicable quasi-infatuation that i have now.

on 06th june he told me about some girl that was part of his i***c*** discord which i already knew he was a part of since ages ago. i asked about her and he said she was from lithuania and that he was pissed off because some other guy was orbiting her which immediately set off alarm bells to me since there’s legit no reason to get pissy that someone else is orbiting a girl unless you like her yourself. he also said some shit to me which i think was unintentionally (or maybe intentionally?) hurtful, about how he could easily afford my prices and that i sell myself way below the market rate (both true but still). i think it’s both these things happening at the same time which particularly stung: ramo orbiting some e-girl who is involved in the same interests and hobbies to a greater extent than i am and also the emphasis that i’m a whore (and a cheap one at that) who no one would ever really consider as a serious dating prospect if they knew anything about my history.

i told him shortly after than i didn’t want to see him for a month or so, making up the excuse that it was because i was gonna be too busy. this is partially true cus i did initially have the plan to work every single day until the date of my breast augmentation/lift surgery which would be 25th june, earning like £700 a day in profit if i worked very hard. that didn’t quite come to fruition because there was some guy who booked with me that left a negative review on UKP which led to a fussilade of criticism from various users about me being a power-tripping time waster who frequently ghosted clients. this is kinda true except the power-tripping part; my timewasting is a direct result of substance abuse problems which is a direct result of whoring myself out to men that i often find unattractive. all in the preceding week (i met ramo on a sunday and this shit happened the following week).

two separate people passive aggressively threatened to send me another negative review over text, i have to provide a discounted rate to two of my regulars due to consistantly missing bookings, someone left me a negative review under my AW profile (which they did through sending a booking request that i didn’t confirm) saying that my service had declined massively over the last few months and that it was like ‘fucking a zombie’ and the final night of working on thursday (10/06), i saw this guy who has followed me under various aliases i’ve had in the past (jade/sana/etc.) and that i last meant at kingston premier inn in like june 2019. would have been a nice blast from the past in some respect but i made a stupid retarded decision to do coke with him - i then sniffed poppers which was retarded as well because poppers are a stimulant and speeds the heart up even further which i didn’t really know at the time. i then got super paranoid that i was gonna have a heart attack and kept telling the client in question to ensure that he call an ambulance if i collapsed, which i’m sure really got him in the mood. his name was james and i stupidly told him my real name. he couldn’t come and i felt like shit because i knew he didn’t enjoy himself - he told me in his mind that he had kind of ‘built’ the meeting up and i suppose it must have fallen massively short of his expectations. it is what it is.

i couldn’t sleep really at all due to the coke. i had several meetings arranged for the next day on friday with regulars all of which i cancelled. i just couldn’t continue on with the same routine of waking up in the morning feeling disgusting because i keep eating junk food delivery, doing an enema, getting drunk and just getting fucked until bedtime even though it was really good money.

i fucked around and went to chinatown on saturday evening and was feeling really happy and relieved about not having to work. i’ve figured that i can just make money after my surgeries and start again under a new profile where i don’t have any negative reviews attached to it and maybe rent out an actual apartment on a monthly basis, since it’d be cheaper than air BnB and i can set things up the way i want. i ate sweet and sour fish and egg fried rice, it was taste (ramo always says that lol).

idk what compelled me to do it but on 14th june, i looked through ramo’s likes on twitter. i think it was because i recalled seeing an obvious girl account in his likes previously - this is something i didn’t really think about at all previously but with the new information he had told me the sunday before, i ended up browsing her account which kind of led to a personal crisis. i found out fairly quickly that this girl was the same one he had referred to on discord (m** on discord, j**** on twitter) simply because there were screencaps on her media referring to the same discord and she was definitely from lithuania. i always assumed that women in these circles were lame and bland tradthots who lacked any kind of constitution beyond mindless pandering to irony poisoned scrotes and genuinely retarded wignats but i was suprised at how immediately endearing this girl appeared even to me, through the internet and as someone i have every reason to feel petty resentment towards.

her shitposts were funny and while she is edgy, she has an underlying sweet and kind disposition. her art is shit but cool in its own scrambled way. she’s also apparently only 16 so it’s understandable - i was a lot more cringe at her age and just as shit at art.

the feeling of inadequacy was overwhelming since in addition to being an actual whore, i’m super cringe, lame and normie compared to her. it made completely sense that ramo would orbit a girl like this and i’ve since completely re-evaluated my position and meaning in his life. it’s a good thing that my cope of feelings of intense inadequacy is to launch myself into a phase of hyper-productivity - i kept practicing drawing (apeing her in a way ig since i recently had kind of given up on drawing), fasting, reading, etc. to try and overcome how worthless and self-loathing i felt at being the unwitting basis of comparison to a young girl who was better than me in every conceivable manner. i even listened to msg 3.

i was in so much pain over this that i couldn’t listen to songs which reminded me of ramo (any i****c*** but specifically drug approved and also temptation) and when i did, i just felt anger at my position and a weird resentment towards him. worth mentioning than ramo had sent me a weird bootycall kind of text sometime before then which came across as really crash, so that made me feel even more devalued.

this is already super long so i’m gonna follow up with a pt. 2 later or maybe edit.

#catch-up #from may 2021 ig #a lot has happened and it would be amiss to just start where things are now without any context especially since it's still quite recent

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spacehologramcollection · 5 years

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Request; Part three of the Proposal and Wedding series. What its like to be married to them/ live with them.

Very long post. It’s like six pages on word! Fucking hell! So I’m adding a cut half way down, there is more don’t worry! But I don’t want it clogging anything up! Warnings; Swearing, mentions of Kano but its a shitpost. Do not worry. GIFS do not belong to me!

Kabal;

· So Kabal’s apartment is how his life is; a hot fucking mess. He tries. He really does. He attributes the messiness from him hardly being there.

· Kabal is a cup hoarder. Like will take cups to his desk/the bedroom/ the living room, and he will not bring them back. The fucking bastard. You think your favourite mug is missing, nah it’s just on his desk. Un-washed.

· Neatest part of his apartment is obviously his nerdy shelves. Everything is well-organised, dusted regularly and alphabetically ordered. It makes no sense but whatever.

· He totally has the draw of miscellaneous crap and wires that nobody knows what there for. He does try and be neat and tidy, but it always ends up creeping up on him.

· He does his fair share when he can, like if you’re busy and he’s free, he will clean up and make sure it’s tidy for when you get back.

· He can’t cook. Don’t let him cook. Fucking do not let him cook. Just don’t do it to yourself.

· He once exploded the pressure cooker. The lid went through the oven hood and there was chili everywhere. He was mortified. How is he that bad!?

· He finds folding laundry to be relaxing however. Like he gets to think about all sorts of shit whilst doing it. Also, it smells super good and soft.

· He changes the bed and makes it religiously. You gotta look after your favourite place in the house. Lives for the smell of clean washing.

· Hook. Swords. On. The. Fucking. Table.

· He also sheds his clothing rapidly when he comes in. Doesn’t want to drag too much dirt into the apartment.

· He’s pretty easy going and fine to live with. Expect trashy music playing most of the time however.

· Him attempting to sing and dance on a Saturday morning is the best image to wake up to. Not the best sound however.

· He lives for goofy dancing around the apartment with you.

· He can be lazy though. Will totally ring you when he’s in the next room, to ask you to turn the fucking light off.

· His car is a fucking mess. Just don’t even go there. His car is just the worst.

· He likes to just lounge around, without a shirt, and do nothing. He’s a massive geek and will live for gaming with you. Even if it is Mario Kart.

· He once had to leave the apartment urgently, like within your first few weeks of living together, you were worried sick. Turns out, he had to go catch a Pokemon on Pokemon Go.

· I could go on forever, but I’ll stop. Overall, Kabal does his fair share of housework and is a fucking hoot and a half to live with.

· Post-Burn, exactly the same once his confidence returns, because its his safe place, a sanctuary where it’s just the two of you. Where he can be himself. He feels safe with you back home.

Erron Black;

· Domestic life will depend and vary on where you live. If he’s still slumming with the Black Dragon or living it up with Kotal in Outworld. They are sort of stark contrasts.

· Either way he’s going to be doing his fair share of housework when he can. He doesn’t expect you to do everything. Because that ain’t fair. But he does have to work a lot, so that something to bear in mind.

· He’ll live for coming home to you. The thought of you being at home when he gets there, because he works a lot later than you, thanks Kano! So that thought drags him through the day. How did he ever get so lucky?

· If you’re ever working and he’s not, he’ll surprise you for when you come home. The house, spotless. There’s music playing, the lights are dimmed, and he’s sat there waiting. The finest cooking you’ve ever seen. His Maw always taught him to cook and he thought he’d treat you. All candlelit and everything. He’s a hopeless romantic at heart. Anything for his spouse!

· If you’re living in Outworld, he’ll love to watch the Sun set, in the garden. Glass of whisky in hand, you lounging on him. The both of you sat in comfortable silence. Waiting for the stars to come out. How did he ever get so lucky? He never thought he’d ever get/deserve a slice of perfection. But yet, here you are.

· If he’s still in the Black Dragon, he’ll make sure you’re both living in a house. Don’t worry about that. He wants a Garden. Somewhere you can both lounge and relax in.

· He’ll also tend to it the best he can. Gotta make sure his Sugar has somewhere nice to sit with him.

· He’d be so up for helping you decorate. Precision are important in decorating and he’s plenty of it!

· His house is a no Kano zone. He doesn’t have his address and never will do.

· Prepare for intimate nights in with him. He just wants to relax, unwind and have a chilled evening with you. Forgetting everything that’s going on out there.

· Prepare for BBQs. Just random ones. Like, its nice weather, you’re both in the house, fuck it! Late night BBQ. Because he is damn good at grilling.

· Erron can also sort of sing, so he’ll love to sing to you a little whilst you’re falling asleep on his lap. He’s such a softie when he’s allowed to be.

Raiden;

· What’s it like living with a God? Well, you know. Because it is fucking interesting. To say the least.

· Raiden, man he tries. He tries to understand Mortals and their fucking customs. But it eludes him at times.

· Like, laundry. Same problem as Kuai. He cannot use a washing machine. Has short circuited it a few times. When he offers, you’re screaming no. Like ples no. No more. You can’t deal with another Power Cut!

· When there is a Power Cut however, your apartment/house is never affected. Why? Because you’re married to the Lord of Thunder! You’re the envy of your whole street/apartment block.

· He does love the idea of having a domestic life. It sounds/looks so picturesque and happy. However, it saddens him greatly. He knows he’ll never be able to have that/ give you that. But also, this is all temporary, unless he can prolong your life. Something he’s trying his hardest to do!

· His life is a mess, but that doesn’t mean he is. He likes everything to be organised and neat. Because its something he can control. He likes to feel like he’s got two hands on the wheel, he cannot feel like that with Earthrealm. But, when it comes to tidying and domestic chores he can!

· He’s very curious and inquisitive with nearly everything you do. So, he’ll like to watch you do your hobbies/ watch you work. It’s not a creepy thing, he’s merely curious about Mortals. And wants to learn.

· If you paint or are creative, he’ll ask if he can join you and if you’ll teach him. He picks up on everything fast! He’s actually pretty good at embroidery. It’s impressive.

· Speaking of Mortals, he also has a soft spot for Mortals, but you take the biscuit, cake and whole picnic. He wants to spend the rest of his life, which is forever, with you. And watching you in awe, brings about feelings of this.

· Whether you’re washing up, cooking or even reading, he’ll feel the wave of awe hit him.

· He’s never had a place to call home properly, so when you refer to your house as ‘our home’ he gets sort of emotional. Well, as emotional as he can get. He has a strange, but pleasant sensation in his stomach and he’ll smile. Repeating the words to you.

· Whenever he feels lost, he’ll always think of home and you, and it anchors and guides him. Clears his mind and focuses him. He’s not just doing this for Earthrealm, he’s doing it for you and you’re future together.

· Lots of nights introducing him to pop culture. It’s a learning experience for the both of you. Him, finally watching Star Wars. You, listening to his meanings and deep conclusions drawn from it.

Sub Zero (Kuai Liang);

· Kuai is pretty much the ideal husband and person to live with, to be fair with you.

· He’s organised, neat and tidy. Everything has a place, and everything is well organised. To the point, you can find literally anything you need pretty much straight away.

· Uses coasters. If you don’t put a mug on a coaster, he will have to slide on under there. It’s automatic and he cannot help it. With you, he’s a lot more chilled out with it. If it was Bi-Han he’d be calling him out for it. Like did he clean the table? No he fucking did not.

· You see a different side living with him. A lighter, happier side. With a dry sense of humour. But he has one. He’s also a lot touchier with you. Like he will hug, kiss and hold your hand at random times.

· He’s got the theory for domestic living but not the practise. He’s never lived with his S/O. Living with his Brother and the rest of the Lin Kuei is different.

· Very accommodating to you moving in. More than happy to help you unpack.

· He’s pretty good at most tasks, except one.

· He cannot do laundry for the life of him. He’s shrunk stuff, even when he’s following the instructions. Legend says, his outfits did have chest panels, they just fell off in the wash. But yeah. Anything else he’s down for doing.

· He is an angry cleaner. Like when he’s feeling a bit miffed, whether it be because Bi-Han has been a bastard or Johnny has wound him up; he will happily angrily mop the floor. It’s sort of a passive aggressive thing to do. He’s never angry at you. But it’s pretty funny to watch.

· It’s how you know someone has pissed him off. Which is a rare occurrence. But yeah. If he wants to scrub his anger away, let him.

· He can sort of cook but its not great. He tries. Man does he try! And you appreciate it.

· He’ll always wake you up to fresh tea, with a kiss to the forehead and a compliment.

· He loves to leave little notes around the house for you to find as well. Like you’re folding laundry and then there’s just a note under one of the towels. Detailing how he loves you.

· He gets back to your room late, he has a lot of responsibility resting on those fine shoulders. He doesn’t expect you to wait up for him… but when you do, his heart feels ready to leap from his body.

· How did one man deserve someone as heavenly as you?!

· If you fall asleep on the couch, he will carry you back to bed and cuddle up with you.

· In Winter, he is hell to sleep with. Cold hands and its cold outside. Like baby its cold outside and cold up in here. You have to banish him to his side of the bed. He’s not overly insulted, he understands. He just wanted to cuddle though! But he can live with it. Damn those cold hands!

· But in Summer, you’re all over him. Pulling him close. Snuggling up to him. God he’s great. Like a human Air Conditioner. Johnny was right! He honestly doesn’t mind.

· He’ll love to read with you, or watch you do your hobbies. He’s extremely inquisitive and is down to try anything new. He can’t sew, knit or do anything like that. He’s not really creative. Years of training has destroyed his creativity.

· So, his only outlet are fantasy novels. So, you both like to borrow and read each other’s book collections. Combining them when you moved in was an impressive task. You had no idea how strong his love for them actually was.

· Your quarters are always cold, because, Artika is cold. So, he always makes sure a fire is lit for you. He needs to keep you warm and cosy.

· Some days you barely see him and when he comes back he’s exhausted. But he will always make time for you and make up for lost time. Whether it be you both having a bath, or you giving him a massage. He does love to spend time with you.

· He does have some very spontaneous and romantic moments when you live together. There not Johnny Cage or Erron Black style ones. But they are lovely. He’ll make you a rose out of ice, or buy you your favourite bottle of wine, or even get you something sugary and sweet to eat. He just seems to know what you want/need, and he’ll make sure you’ve got it.

· You call it his S/O sense. He laughs. Oh yeah, he actually laughs and smiles a lot more with you.

· He’ll love to talk about the future as well. Because, he wants to try and have a normal life. God, he deserves it. Fucking give this man some happiness for fuck sake! He needs a hug and vacation.

Scorpion (Hanzo Hasashi)

· He’s a pro at this. We cannot deny this. He’s probably the most prepared out of them all. Kuai has the theory, but Hanzo has both theory and practise.

· He can cook, and he does love to do it when he has the time. You know what, he’s the Grand fucking master, he will make time to cook for you.

· Nothing better than coming back to see he’s cooked something traditional for you. He’ll tell you about the recipe either whilst you eat, or whilst you attempt to help (Watch) him cook. And how its an old family recipe.

· He, like Kuai, is neat and tidy. But not as OTT as Kuai. He’s not going to be like here’s a coaster, please use it. He’s laxer.

· He wishes he could devote more time to helping around the house. Just like Kuai. But he is the Grandmaster to the Shira Ryu. He has no time.

· Speaking of the Shira Ryu, marrying him and living with him, means you’re apart of the big family now.

· So, you’re never by yourself, you’ll get chatting to the other members spouses. So, you’ve always got friends.

· It warms Hanzo’s heart seeing you settle in. He loves it. Because this is all he’s ever wanted.

· Your room has the best view. Overlooking the Fire Gardens. It’s beautiful to wake up to every morning. All the petals falling down outside your window.

· You’ll make a comment every morning about the beauty outside, with Hazno commenting on how its not a shadow in comparsion to your beauty. What a fucking softy.

· You see the Hanzo side of him. Not Grandmaster Hasashi. Not Scorpion. Just Hanzo. A rawer side of him. One that has lived, loved and lost. Who wants to be loved and have redemption more than the air he breathes.

· This is an honour and one that you love. He loves and adores you and dotes on you. He says you share the work, but he always ends up doing more than you. He just wants you to take it easy. You put up with his Grumpy arse. After all. That’s a full-time job.

· If he has to leave early, he’ll write you a note and make you an origami flower. As well as ensuring you’re warm and comfortable.

· He loves quiet nights in with you. A chance to relax and be connected. So maybe some mediating, good food and you two just cuddling in bed.

· You see his shameless side as well. He lives for trashy TV. Because shit is going down and it does not involve him. So, he can enjoy watching everything burn. Because it doesn’t involve him, Takeda or anyone he knows. He can breathe.

Kano (For the shits and giggles);

· His apartment is just a mess.

· There’s a blowup doll on the bed.

· It’s fucking horrific, you’ll need a tetanus jab after being in it.

· He doesn’t make it home most nights. Just passes out either on the gross or in the elevator.

· Dishes are never done. So, you have to eat your pasta from a cup.

· Drinks straight from the milk carton and puts it back.

· There’s another blowup doll in the cupboard.

· Fucking run. Go to Kabal’s apartment. He’ll make you laugh and its actually a lot cleaner. Kabal’s apartment is chaotic good whilst Kano’s is just chaotic evil.

· Blow up Doll in the pool.

· He’s passed out in the hallway. Just run away with Kabal. Fucking do it.

· Blow up Doll in the bath.

· Or Erron. Fucking get Erron to whisk you away! He’d treat you right.

· Blow up Doll on the sofa.

· Fucking hell, even Baraka is more of a gentleman than Kano.

· What I’m trying to get at, is you deserve better.

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lamiahypnosia · 4 years

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Hype Train Keep A’Rollin, or, The Obligatory The Outer Worlds Deep Dive Rant

Okay so…

There’s like. Maybe three things in the game world I’m looking forward to.

Baldur’s Gate 3, Final Fantasy 7 Remake and Peril on Gorgon. My interest in FF7R has waned, admittedly but my love of The Outer Worlds is still pretty strong.

I did preorder Shadowlands for World of Warcraft and there’s not much on my radar. I am debating checking out Mass Effect since as a person of taste I enjoy BioWare games.

Baldur’s Gate 3 is still contentious to me as I truthfully don’t care much for the tabletop RPG hit rolls and all that math shit. I enjoyed the first two Baldur’s Gate games because of the story, true. That’s my main draw, I love a good story. A good story and characters I’ll actually give a shit about. Is that so hard? Apparently it’s really fucking hard to do. But back to the Outer Worlds for a second. It wasn’t really hyped that much unless you count the obvious wink nudges to the New Vegas stans who were holding out hope that The Outer Worlds is New Vegas IN SPACE.

No, it’s not. It’s really not. As I mentioned in my review TOW is a new IP that can stand on its own two legs and sure it has a developer behind it that put out a really good game in eighteen months.

Yeah, the reason New Vegas is so sparse looking is because Obsidian could only snare the rights for Fallout from Bethesda for a little over a year so they reused assets from Fallout 3 hence why it has a DLC feel but not really, that sounds harsh. Was that too harsh?

For what it’s worth I give credit where credit is due. Obsidian busted their asses on New Vegas and it shows- the places are oozing atmosphere and the characters are outstandingly written. Too bad Fallout 4 only got that second one for the companions and don’t @ me, the companions are good and you know it. Even if Fallout 4’s story is a dumpster fire.

Fallout 76 is a dumpster fire too, not just because of the bugs and subscription platform it just…it was so full of potential, the atmosphere is perfect. Just not for an MMO. Wavy Willard’s Water Park is creepy as fuck to me, something about the decayed place of innocent fun. Though wouldn’t a water park be closed in October, because the bombs fell in October. I can’t recall if the old terminal entries were written in summer or what twenty five years before the bombs fell. This game is confusing.

Wastelanders feels unfinished and half-assed. That’s all there is to say about it. I don’t have the energy to talk about it. I was set up for disappointment. I still really enjoy exploring and crafting but I don’t enjoy inventory management (I’m a serial hoarder, ask my husband) and I really don’t enjoy getting pasted by a gaggle of level 14 cryptids while I’m level 42 because the hit detection in this game is pretty much non existent. I just wildly swing my super sledge and pray I can glitch my way through it.

Anyway.

I fell down the Reddit rabbit hole and boy, r/theoutworlds is chock full of New Vegas stans foaming at the mouth. People compare The Outer Worlds to New Vegas so much (same developer) that talking about one or the other on their respective subreddits is against the rules. I saw a review of some salty stan whining about how few choices there are in The Outer Worlds. What I hear is ‘Why is this literally not the exact same as Fallout New Vegas?! I want to be a capricious god with unlimited agency.’ The reviews are full of ‘I want, I wish, I miss.’ I made a shitpost a few weeks ago on Facebook about wanting to fight people regarding my opinion on New Vegas which is in a nutshell ‘It’s a good game, but I can’t get invested.’ The Outer Worlds on the other hand for all that it’s full of satire and black comedy had me invested.

So after my stellar review of The Outer Worlds you’re probably thinking ‘okay so where is your full disclosure essay, you love Fallout 4 and what you love you chasten’. Well now that you mention it…

From here on out there be spoilers, major spoilers for both endings of The Outer Worlds.

The Outer Worlds was NEVER stated to be an open world. I made a few minor griping points in my review about there rarely being new dialogue when you talk one on one with a character. I also think the combat is fairly standard but I don’t really care about that all that much plus the science weapons are fun. Trailers also showcased Ellie as a companion though you don’t meet her in Emerald Vale you meet her on the Groundbreaker. Also Ellie is boring.

She’s a doctor, a surgeon from Byzantium who got tired of the bureaucracy and her uptight parents so she became a pirate and…that’s it. Until you drop in to visit her parents and find out they faked her death and are living off the insurance payouts. They’re not even happy to see her because they’re keeping up appearances. All you can do is help Ellie commit insurance fraud to screw them over and Ellie is slightly less aloof from now on. That’s the character you wanna hype? Dr. Do Nothing?

Moving on. People latch on to Parvati Holcomb, the dorky precious engineer and her quest is to get things for a nice date with somebody who is already obviously into her.

She’s the cinnamon bun of the gang, full of sugar and no substance. Don’t get me wrong I love and must protect Parvati but she’s nowhere as interesting as Vicar Max or even Felix. She comes out of her shell because she gets a girlfriend. Whoop de doo.

Felix Millstone is an orphan kid from Groundbreaker who has a rebellious streak and that’s it. His personal quest is learning his old mentor is a Board bootlicker. The end. His whole arc is basically don’t meet your heroes which can include you if you’re a jerk. A filthy Board bootlicking jerk. He’s at least got a few more aspects to him, he treats Parvati, Ellie and Nyoka like big sisters and depending on actions made, treats Vicar Max like a big brother. Who were his parents? Why was he abandoned? DLC material please?

Speaking of Max.

Oof. Max is a fan favorite because priest kink. I don’t have a priest kink and we don’t kink shame here but Max is kind of an awful person. He’s mister holier than thou, only interested in his religion as a topic of debate. He’s not interested in guiding people and while you could say he spouts corporate approved platitudes he’s clearly not dumb. Far from it, he even immediately pegs the Stranger (the player character) as an outsider because they don’t look dead inside and you can call him out on how bad of a shepherd he is. Max never really gets better if you do his quest successfully. He does become less of a prick but I hold that he’s still a bad person. Maybe he’s open to not being a dick, and his banter with the other characters changes accordingly. His best ending indicates he does become a true missionary and even uses his combat skills to defend the town. It’s debatable.

Max’s character develops. He is a character who grows and changes. Sort of. Most of his character is based off how salty he is. So he learns to use the salt sparingly. Direct anger where it should go, ask questions in the right circumstances, stop acting like you know everything, embrace chaos.

It’s not like dodging the lesson is just to fit the irreverent tone. Nyoka is sad because her friends all died and that’s why she drinks. She’s still competent, trains Parvati with firearms and helps Felix with his drink recipe experiments. it feels good to help with her quest and her saying she lost a family but got a new one will give you the warm fuzzies.

SAM is a robot. I guess he’s funny in theory but I never use him. The ship ain’t gonna clean itself.

So now that I’ve thoroughly trashed all the beloved companions you might wonder what character do I actually like?

Okay. If my constant posts weren’t evidence my favorite character is Phineas Welles, the guy who wakes you up from cryosleep. Forget Parvati a second, Phineas is the best and most endearing character and I will fight you over this.

From his defiance of the Board to having the foulest mouth of the cast, his cartoony movements and love of puns, how could you betray Phineas to the Board for wealth and power? Also he builds a gun and names it Phin’s Phorce. I don’t care who you are, that’s adorable.

Still Phineas is interesting, he’s definitely a deceitful little bugger. Space grandpa, my left butt cheek. If you decide to side with the Board for whatever reason- money, you think Phineas is a liar- and skip the Hope to Tartarus for its inhabitants to be yeeted out so the elite of Byzantium can live in luxury while the filthy peasants are frozen Phineas gets pissed off and flies to Tartarus to start a prison riot taking Adjutant Akande hostage. You can try to talk him down and even if you succeed and try to talk him into surrendering to the Board he refuses, stating that he will not crawl back and beg them for forgiveness. Then he pulls a gun and shoots himself in the fucking head.

If you’re an immersion addict like me you might get on a lawful stupid ‘kill what I see as evil’ streak and you plugged Chairman Rockwell and Adjutant Akande because they’re bad evil guys you’re missing the point.

I’m not saying this is some kind of character deficit in you in real life but to get a better picture of how good the writing in The Outer Worlds is, hear me out.

I had a discussion with a friend asking what alignment Phineas and the Board would fit in. He said Phineas is chaotic neutral, bordering chaotic good whereas the Board is lawful neutral.

The Board is just greedy and they’ve lost their sense of identity which makes them a blank corporate face instead of individuals. They’re built up as this faceless omniscient entity but when you pull aside the curtain you find they’re just people stumbling about screaming ‘oh shit now what do we do?’ as becomes abundantly clear when you meet Minister Clarke. There’s a coverup happening because of course there is.

Phineas has kept his identity, his truth. If you think about it Phineas is only doing what he does to prove the Board wrong and that just happens to save the colony- an altruistic middle finger if you will. He’s standing off to one side pointing and screaming ‘see I was right!’

He had no qualms about sending you to your probable death- you were lucky but you still only had a twenty eight percent chance of not becoming a puddle. Phineas also had some rather jarring dialogue about shooting the members of the Board in the back of the head. His actions, his beliefs are absolute. And that, dear readers, is what keeps him from being chaotic good.

You can talk both Chairman Rockwell and Adjutant Akande into helping you and Phineas isn’t thrilled but he trusts you to handle it. It’s easier to shoot everyone and sweep our problems under the proverbial rug, isn’t it? Are Rockwell and Akande bad people? Maybe? A little, but mostly they’re ignorant and shit has to hit the fan before they’ll listen. But they do listen.

The pro Board ending puts me in mind of an old George RR Martin short story called In The House Of The Worm. It takes place in an old crumbling ruin deep underground where there two races, the grouns and the yagalla’hai, are constantly at war with one another. They fight, kill and eat each other. The yagalla’hai are nihilists who worship decay and don’t really give a fuck about that they’re probably all going to die unless they mate with the grouns and the sun is dying but sure let’s feast, dance, fuck and party all the time.

You can yeet everyone on the Hope into space and live a life of extravagant wealth til the end of your days while Halcyon crumbles apart around you. Meanwhile all your cuddly companions are miserable beyond human comprehension, their dreams crushed and that nice old man who saved you dies, betrayed and alone.

Do you feel good about yourself? Are you happy with how that turned out?

Nyoka makes an interesting point that Halcyon needs order. You can still talk to her like an edgy teenager who favors absolute anarchy. Yes, the colony needs order, they just need BETTER order. I think I had a point to make? Oh yeah, The Outer Worlds is fucking amazing and deserves every drop of hype and I cannot fucking wait for the DLC. That’s the post.

#the outer worlds #spoilers #major spoilers #i am not kidding there are spoilers #phineas welles #i love him so much oh my law

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uthseikoashx-inflamedme · 4 years

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(a senseless, compulsive and without any objectivity post really, and there's a lot of mistakes)

I just rewatched FB1 and 2 this evening and:

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

I forgot how awesome were Newt, Tina, Queenie and Jacob in FB1

I forgot how FB1 had a so well-written plot and how satisfying was this movie

I looked after Graves/Grindelwald and watching the scenes where he appears is a hilarious experience, I was delighted to analyse everything he said and did with his true identity in mind (and when MACUSA employees talk about Grindelwald with him- I'm a simple girl, I smirk)

(Also, he is very smart, the way he manipulates everyone when he discovers about Newt's Obscurus is something I liked to watch)

(How nobody found out he was not Percival Graves - he was doing power wandless and informulated magic constantly, it's the sign of marvellous skills - and Grindelwald almost didn't hide it, his colleagues were a bit oblivious, weren't they? I mean, they knew the true Graves, they never figured out?)

I was so invested in FB1 and its characters it was amazing

Also, Credence is definitely not human, he seems more... etheral? Is it because he's originally an Obscurus or something like that?

(Also something can be sure, even if both Ariana and Credence are Obscurus, they can't belong to the same nature - if Credence was initially a human like Ari was, he would have died after the MACUSA employees casted their spells - Ari just died and his corpse was lying on the floor, she didn't transform herself like Credence did)

Also, Grindelwald is odious, detestable towards Credence, I didn't want to punch someone in the face like this since a quite long time

Fantastic Beasts: Crimes of Grindelwald

About FB2, it was sometimes strangely... unsatisfying (or not strangely, because there are flaws which were not in FB1 to my opinion)

I'm happy because I understood this time how Jacob kept his memories and already knew Credence survived thanks the end of FB1

But unfortunately, even if I know the story, it seems to be so rushed - to many characters to be really empathetic for me

Also I had the feeling there's a lot of them who actually didn't do so much, who are just parts of the plot and not real personalities? Maybe I was less focused - I was - but still

In fact, I think my real problem with the film is: it shows glimpses of a larger story and the main story doesn't deserve alone a film

To me, the main plot is about Credence, the second one is about Newt and his team

To be honest, even if I do love Newt's team, specially Queenie arc who's a very lovely character (and damn interesting (but she didn't do good things in FB2 sniff)) (but Tina and Jacob and Newt were so sweet hell) the real story was about Credence - in fact, showing how Credence ended up with Grindelwald was probably the aim of the film

And besides, the movie wanted to show good guys arc (so Newt who wants to reconcile with Tina, Tina who wants to find Credence, Jacob who wants to find Queenie, Queenie who's confused and hopeless), a bit of context about Dumbledore's and Grindelwald's origin story, the rising influence of Grindelwald back in 1927, how the two most powerful wizards of their age organised their own team of allies, and I didn't mention Leta's backstory with Newt and with Corvus, Yusuf's own backstory, Theseus, Grindelwald's acolytes Rosier and Abernathy, Grimmson role, I forgot Travers also, and Flammel, and also Nagini- hell in fact the movie is saying a lot - I swear I didn't wanted to write a that long list but well it might explain why I am a bit confused about that movie

And again I don't understand why it didn't work for me because I love lore, to see the web between the data, the events and the persons and that exactly what the movie does

(Entirely irrelevant here, but I'm personally betrayed by Grindelwald who's a huge bastard, a real monster, and everytime I see him as an adult I'm sad because if he had done the good choices and - for example - didn’t take pleasure to kill people and actually fought for a genuine "Greater Good" both Albus and Gellert could have been happy pfff)

(Again irrelevant, but I couldn't help but laugh at the end with the parallel between Grindelwald and Dumbledore, I saw them as two ex who are still resentful against the other - but here, their fight takes mondial proportions, and they found a new ally to piss off the other, and I know I shouldn't seeing that but bloody hell I'm tired of this film I'm sorry I will stop)

It feels like a necessary exposition to prepare FB3 but not like a real, intimate film? In my opinion again, I can understand if you actually liked FB2

It's beautiful nonetheless, the clothes, the ambiance, the decor and the attention on the details, it's fairly amazing

The music, the realisation and the editing were great too, to my opinion - sometimes the editing is brilliant in fact, it draws parallels

Having a lot of lore and a lot of characters to theorise and write is awesome too, even if I believe it was not exactly the goal the movie wanted to achieve

(The way Dumbledore tried to manipulate Newt, also so interesting, the only difference between he and his former lover here is the gentle music (and the not-so-gentle smile of Grindelwald facing Queenie))

ALSO, everytime Credence sees his baby Phoenix Grindelwald is around, a point which support the theory of Credence-not-actually-a-Dumbledore with a Phoenix summoned, by a way or by another, by Grindelwald himself

(True question, why didn't Gellert kill Newt (and Theseus) in Père-Lachaise after the meeting - because no-fuckin-body is going to convince me he wasn't able to do it and he loathes Newt (because because of him Grindelwald had been arrested by MACUSA and Newt is Dumbledore's protégé))

(Or maybe Leta cast a protection like Lily did??? Actually why not??? (I hope not it will ruined a bit the sense of it if it is a so common protection))

(Or maybe Gellert knows he will need at least one of them in the future? Because he's a Seer, etc)

To sum up, the movie is great to theorise and will take sense in the future when the next movies will be released, but as a film itself, I was a bit let down

(I don't want to just yell at the film, I will never be able to create something like that and I'm probably too young and inexperienced concerning movie's creation but pfff I wanted to express what I was thinking about it so here I am)

Sorry about the multiple mistakes, again I'm not a native speaker and it's a bit a shitpost so I guess it's not so serious, but sorry anyway!

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halfusek · 6 years

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BATIM SPOILERS AHEAD

SECRET MESSAGES FROM CHAPTERS 1 - 5

With a sort of analysis/shitposting on my side? Yea.

Chapter 1

There is like two walls with these, that’s a lot. Is he... aware from the beginning now? I mean someone’s crossing this and Henry is implied to be leaving these messages so...?

Choose your fighter.

Ok wow harsh. Haven’t you seen all these cool AUs in his house?

Also can I just point out how... Joey... literally... drew... the Studio...

Oh, my bad.

He drew STUDIOS. Because the damn thing keeps happening over and over again.

Oh fuck if that’s the case then that is clever. I made puns about him drawing the studio before, wish I did something with it before Chapter 5 dropped, that would be hilarious to look back at fvdfjkvnfkj

That’s just depressing. But like... yeah...

Wow Henry you must be a proud mom now

Hey remember when DAGames played Chapter 4 and was interrupting Alice Angel’s monologue by telling her to stop watch him poop

It spells “There never was a choice.” (never underlined)

Those messages are either hilarious or straight up depressing.

It’s... kinda sweet how Henry from the past (pasts) helps his future self (selfs). And encourages.

I’m pretty sure she’s got many hearts in her stock.

STOP WATCHING ME POOP

Henry what the fuck

The falling human made out of the two Ls, the Y and the splatters above it-

Fuck.

GASPS NO WAY

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. He is not the creator of the cartoons. He is the creator OF THIS WHOLE FUCKING STUDIO AND EVERYONE IN IT. Like it’s maybe a sort of obvious thought but when you let it sink in... damn

Rest of the chapters under the cut because it’s really long

Chapter 2

ARE THOSE IRL BODIES? YES? NO? SYMBOLS OF THEIR SOULS BEING TRAPPED HERE? WHAT???

Do you remember that? Or only slightly? Oh man. “I should have warned him” thoughts and then you get a pissed off boy in Chapter 5.

COME ON NOW

Ok. How. How did you write anything there. When. The only time he’s aware would be right after Sammy hits him with the dustpan. So is he like fainting and writing it? So he wouldn’t be able to write anything else like SAMMY IS GOING TO KNOCK YOU OUT WITH A FUCKING DUST PAN because yeah he’s passing out so it’s just... OUCH! Also to confirm this he is facing the way he’s facing when he’s on the floor. God that’s both shitposty and depressing. Nice.

Henry don’t be a dick

So you do sing 👀

I wonder how Henry figured out walking backwards to not trigger the Demon here and write this specific message. Also is Joey behind those closed doors because there’s the whistling.

Is he cooking

Chapter 3

Oh, hi.

Excuse me what

Henry is a Jacksepticeye fan confirmed

Joey is a man of ideas... and only ideas.

Which is why he created a studio, an OC based on a person he has a one sided crush on (me) from who he stole and claimed their OC as his, also made that stolen OC a thing and then made both of the OCs fight in an infinite loop in the massive studio which is behind his kitchen.

This both has a literal meaning but is also like a deeper general thought Henry do you want Joey to create a therapist OC you seem to have some problems

Why do these coffins hurt so much

Who are you asking Henry because Alice sure won’t fucking read that And why won’t you just write it with regular ink why you gotta do it like this

Why does he keep this thing secret? Did he make it? Probably since he’s the one leaving the messages Hmm

I fucking wheezed.

But also imagine Alice just giving her speech and Henry writing something on the wall with his finger Unless he doesn’t write that in a literal sense but like... spiritually Huh

THEY HAD DRINKS TOGETHER AND JOEY WAS PAYING FOR THEM AWW

He’s so fucking gay I swear to fucking gods.

Let’s hop on the existential crisis train, choo, choo.

How can you be kind to people who try to murder you

But this. This. Is such a good fucking work/life thought like damn. I love this game for those.

But are those just some thoughts Henry wanted to get out of his head or does it have something to do with the game because I’m kinda getting pacifist/neutral/genocide route vibes from this. But it it’s not the case it’s still pretty neat, we do meet them, we just don’t have the choice to treat them in some way most of the times.

It’s on level 14 and damn you game damn you yet again. I guess it can also be applied to that moment when The Projectionist is reaching out for Henry who is hidden in the Miracle Station? Like we don’t know what to expect of him because he had that small moment of realisation of... something. And he is also one of Henry’s “old friends”.

Is Is Ink Demon killing The Projectionist a symbol of Joey’s jealousness like Norman: *reaching out in curiosity, maybe to help* Joey: >:( my fren

Chapter 4

Thanks. Roll credits. So Chapter 4 is intentionally pointless in the terms of Henry trying to save Boris. THAT’S FUCKING SAD STOP IT

NOT. MY. DOG. YOU. BITCH.

So Henry is catching up. Joey does regret all that shit he did. I wonder how exactly does it tie here, with Bertie. Maybe that theory I had about Bendy Land being Hell for Bendy? :0c I don’t really think so but that’s a thought.

I’m losing my shit.

Okay that seems like another woke thought.

Henry can’t change not being able to save Boris.

Joey can’t change all of his mistakes. But Joey is the one making it happen over and over again so it might be slightly pointed at him?

Like, pal. Stop dwelling on your mistakes. Move on. Let me the fuck out.

This game is really heavy with this problem:

Move towards your goal, hope, believe, dream, don’t give up. Well actually do if it’s like super hard.

????? This is such a deep uuhhh analysis of this like one of most basics functions of how we people fucking work and live, what keeps us going. Holy shit I am IN LOVE with that.

But oof yeah Henry was and IS the one good at pushing Joey to do the right thing. Man...

Instead of trying to cheer you up lemme just write this message you can’t read real quick.

THAT WHOLE FUCKING THING WAS POINTLESS AND I’M LOWKEY MAD

;_; holy lord sweet baby jesus

Can Henry like be fine fun concept Meatly please

I suggest giving this a read if you as I weren’t familiar with that expression https://quoteinvestigator.com/2014/09/23/heels/

Of course it’s a pun on “Time heals all wounds” expression. The word “heels” there refers to contemptible people. Earliest citation: 1934 and it got more popular around that time till something around the 50s-60s according to that website at least. Neat.

That is interesting. I guess we can associate the door with Joey as well since Henry warns himself not to go through them? And the Demon drags Projectionist’s corpse through them. Sorta against his will, heeeeeeh.

They look like they could be interactive but I dunno :0c

Oh, yeah. That two-faced motherfucker. That’s my bitch.

HE GAVE THEM FUCKING NAMES

Chapter 5

I feel like it was kinda exaggerated. Henry they like saved your life twice or so, how salty can you be

OKAY LET ME TELL YOU ONE FUCKING THING

AT FIRST WHILE PLAYING I THOUGHT JOEY WROTE THOSE BECAUSE

I mean why the fuck would they drop this star outta nowhere AND HE IS EXTRA LIKE THIS

But then again there’s this “Don’t go through the door”

Unless Joey did contact him through this as well? But I’m assuming it only because of the stars vfnjksd Idk I like when symbols actualy uhhh symbolise something

ALSO YOU KNOW WHAT’S INTERESTING

This is pointing at ANOTHER way. Without the boat. Possibly the Valued Employee (take the long walk) achievement?

I would check it right fucking now but my saves are fucked and I would have to replay everything again and I’m just too tired hhhh

Also Valued Employee does sound like someone who listens to their boss right?

And I’m getting the impression it’s not all Henry’s writing because it seems as if there is a different personality present? Idk

That sounds like sort of both of them. Joey is cheering for Henry, even if he’s planning to make him go through all of this again. Does he... have to make him go through it? That’s a bit odd. Joey nani the fuck.

I like the idea of Joey saying this ok lemme dream vskjvnskjvs

But it could be Henry (past/present/whatever) trying to cheer himself up like he did with the “Don’t be scared” message (if that was also him)

Oh, Henry...

Once people That implies that real people got somehow affected, right?

I love the halo and the bone, also you can see the bone only if you give it to Boris in Chapter 3

Wait It is The whole fucking Ink Machine Is inside Holy

A cooking gay.

Ink Demon/Joey parallel implication. I don’t think he is Bendy in a straight up sense though. He is/was a soulless boss, just how soulless Bendy was/is. I wonder if there is a studio version of him or HHHHHH complicated stuff

Is it like When people create something good but they just don't know when to stop it eventually ends up really bad And the Demon took The End so his cartoon couldn't be finished and it all had to keep going, Joey had to keep going Hm?

So like there is no message on Henry’s second desk

But it does trigger the same dialogue AND IT HURTS

Actually a lot of people missed the arrows so just so you know

But I thought we don’t like doors

Also it’s the last hidden message so I do believe it has a special meaning

CONCLUSION get Henry outta here and give him loads of therapy

Is his fucking last name Stein because he made monsters via the Ink Machine by powering it goddamnit Joey don’t trick people into creating that shit

#bendy and the ink machine #batim spoilers #bendy and the ink machine spoilers #chapter 5 spoilers #halfpost #long post #long fucking post #oh my

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missjukebox8bit · 4 years

Text

And now for my Top 10 Tumblr Posts of 2019!

1). 3,659 notes - 02 January 2019

Me: Hi Tumblr, how’s your day been?

Tumblr: EVERYBODY’S PISSED BECAUSE A SHITPOSTING ELDRITCH HORROR GOT PAID TO EAT CRAYONS

Me: (sipping tea) so its been a pretty average day all things considered

Ah yes, my number one post of this year was one I made at the very beginning of the year! and was also about the first major discourse of the year. I remember this, I made this post and went to bed, and then it suddenly had thousands of notes and I got my first Tumblr hate! Ah, good memories ^_^

I haven’t been following the Gaud situation since then so i dunno what my stance is on them right now, but this post was never really meant to be pro-Gaud or anti-Gaud, more just a statement on how controversies that sound this bizarre out of context could only happen on Tumblr

2). 882 notes - 27 October 2019

is this real life

I have always loved Homstar Runner as a kid

and i recently began loving anime

so the day that anime and Homestar Runner met

was the day I realized anything is possible

3). 717 notes - 03 November 2019

Some people: PENNY COMING BACK GOOD AS NEW AND REMEMBERING EVERYTHING CHEAPENS THE EMOTIONAL IMPACT OF VOLUME 3! NOW ALL THE PAIN AND SUFFERING WAS FOR NOTHING!

Pyrrha, who is definitely still dead and probably isn’t coming back ever again:

When Penny came back in RWBY everyone was like “they’re undoing everything bad that happened in Volume 3!” but like... guys

did you forget Pyrrha

HOW COULD YOU FORGET PYRRHA

luckily a bunch of people shared my sentiment

4). 535 notes - 25 November 2019

Seven years of the RWBY fandom making “Weiss you useless lesbian” memes and one volume has made the foundation of our oldest joke crumble to the ground due to the revelation that Yang was the useless lesbian all along

Look I love Bumbleby but “Yang you useless lesbian” just doesn’t have the same ring to it, ya know?

5). 463 notes - 12 November 2019

hey guys you know how PM Seymour has repeatedly said he doesn’t care how lewd people think Cyana is and he’s really tired of us all telling him about it

now this might sound crazy, but maybe

just maybe

we should all stop telling him about it

Ooh yay more discourse posts!

All the stuff that happened with P.M. Seymour last month was really disheartening, he’s a great guy who makes great content and does not deserve all the inappropriate comments he gets

I hope things turn out better for him in 2020! Love you, PM ^_^

6). 290 notes - 12 May 2019

@mars-the-4th-planet asked: So whats the deal with projared, pbg, etc?

oh boy **cracks knuckles**

more discourse! yayyyyyyyyyy!

I’m not copy-pasting this whole thing because it is very long so just click the link if you wanna see. It was funny because at the time i was trying to avoid the whole ProJared drama, but then my good friend mars asked me about it so I was like “WHELP, TIME TO UNLOAD ALL THE INSANITY THAT IS THIS CONTROVERSY”

Man was that in May? That feels like so long ago

This year has been long

7). 283 notes - 15 September 2019

I feel like we don’t talk enough about the time the McElroy’s threw a tarantula parade

I regret not having elaborated more on just how ridiculous this tarantula parade was

So a guy calls into MBMBaM and asks the brothers to convince his wife to let them get a pet tarantula

So they decide to throw a parade with an actual marching band playing “Itsy Bitsy Spider”, and a float where they crowned themselves King of the Ranchos

man i aspire to be that level of extra

AND SHE STILL DIDN’T LET THEM GET A TARANTULA

8). 279 notes - 08 November 2019

Me: Hey Tumblr? Can I see the posts from this blog I willingly followed?

Tumblr: Hmm…

Tumblr: Let me think.

Tumblr: …

Tumblr: Nah

This is a situation we all can relate to. A few of the responses to this post made it much funnier than my original, if you’ve seen this around you’ve probably seen it with @remusthedukeofdeodorant‘s or @rafa-starkiller‘s additions, thanks for spreading my post! And making it better!

9). 209 notes - 09 November 2019

Ironwood: What did Ozpin say about the relic? Did it have any questions left?

Ruby:

I’m glad so many of my RWBY posts this volume are getting notoriety! The second I saw this episode I immediately knew someone needed to make this meme. And if no one else would, then I will!

10). 198 notes - 09 August 2019

Hey so does anyone else think Joey Claire, Jake’s canonical daughter in Hiveswap who was raised by Roxy as a babysitter

kinda looks like Roxy and Jake’s baby that Caliborn made Dirk draw

ah yes this observation that i believe was actually made by my friend @standardkarma135, i just made the post first before them. And man was it a crazy thing to realize

Was that intentional?

Did Hussie intend this to be the way things go

I mean knowing him it could definitely be intentional, I wouldn’t put it past him

Well that’s my Top 10 posts on Tumblr so far this year! I guess the moral this year was

But I’m glad there were a few non-drama posts in there like my RWBY and Homestuck stuff! Thank you to everyone who liked and reblogged my posts this year, and especially thank you to all my mutuals and everyone I follow that make such amazing posts that keep me coming back to this website! Let’s hope that 2020 is better for all of us!

Created by TumblrTop10

#tumblrtop10 #rwby #homestar runner #homestuck #mbmbam

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shadow-djinni · 4 years

Text

Generalizations in Fandom

Or, some idiot on my dash made an underinformed comment about shipping trends and now I have to go prove them wrong.

I’m a day late with my griping, but much better-researched for it, which means this post (under the cut) is going to be even longer now. Apologies in advance. If you’d like to read my exceedingly long-winded griping, hit the readmore button.

A quick preface–and some background–to my complaining, which will be important going forward. Though I’m by no means a fandom old, nor am I claiming that status, I’ve been in and around fandom for over eight years now, and have been an active content creator for seven and a half. In that timeframe, I’ve been in and out of a wide range of fandoms, all with different fannish climates and behaviors, so I like to think I have a fair bit of experience in these spaces.

So, yesterday, a blog I had been following–which, up until this point, had expressed views on fandom I generally agreed with–made a post complaining about the proliferation of slash fic in fandom. I’m not going to link the post or @ the blogger in question, mostly because I have no intentions of picking a fight with said blogger or with their fans, as I understand they have a relatively large following, but the post was something to the effect of “fandoms always lionize overwhelmingly white noncanon m/m ships at the expense of women and POC”. Now, at a glance, that looks…correct, right? At least considering the fandoms you usually see on Tumblr. But that statement looks…really off to me, given my own lived experience, and the longer I looked the more off it looked, and the more complaints I had with it.

The first problem with this statement, and others like it: there is no such thing as a pan-fandom issue. Statements like these posit that all fandoms, regardless of the source material, always have or develop the issue the poster sees and wishes to discuss. It’s a good way to get attention, but it lacks the nuance to really support itself under scrutiny. The truth of the matter is that the source material a fandom draws for has influence over the sort of fans who are drawn to it and the material they have to work with, which therefore effects the trends in tropes and shipping the fandom in question develops–and while broad similarities may be drawn across multiple fandoms with similar elements to them, no two fandoms develop alike, an effect which is compounded by differences in age, genre, and location of origin of the source material.

For a personal example, I’ve been active in four fandoms I would consider strongly influential in terms of my taste in fiction and my writing ability and style. Without getting overly specific, those fandoms are:

a video game franchise begun in the 80s, which has seen new installments released every 5-10 years

a magical girl manga (and later anime) produced in the early ‘00s, which has not seen new canon since

a popular and ongoing live action American movie series, which began release within the last decade

and, for good or ill, Voltron (an animated cartoon released in summer ‘16, which ran through December ‘18 with an utter shitstorm of a fandom)

If we believe statements such as the one above, one would expect that all four of those fandoms would have exactly the same inter-fandom issues, namely the sidelining of women and characters of color in favor of the white slash pairing of the day–but, having been in these fandoms, that’s true for exactly one of them. I’d give you all three guesses, but let’s face it, the answer is obvious.

It’s the live action American movie series.

In fact, the initial statement is fairly accurate when assessing that work, and other live action American movie series and television shows, and there’s a number of reasons why. American live action media often gives disproportionate representation to white men, particularly when it comes to lead roles, while consigning women and POC to supporting roles. As such, the (white, male) leads garner more development than the support roles, which makes the leads easier and more appealing for fic writers and shippers to work with. Media with black leads, or other leads of color, also often have smaller fandoms overall, and as such don’t make the big, obvious waves large-scale fandoms like…say, Harry Potter or the MCU make on Tumblr.

Canonical (female) love interests are also often sidelined by live action media fandoms, for a number of reasons–namely, in canon they are often granted less screentime, less depth, and less subjectivity than their male castmates, and are frequently treated as objects by the camera. This makes it harder to empathize with them, especially given fandom is majority women who may be rendered too uncomfortable to work with the characters–there’s a good deal of baked-in misogyny that would need to be untangled from the character herself, and in most cases only the most committed of fans are actually going to sit down to do the work.

Now, mind you, these do not apply to all fandoms. Voltron had some of the same problems with sidelining canonical love interests–but Voltron’s fandom flagships gag were between a half-human character of indeterminate ethnicity and two men of color, one of whom is canonically queer. The magical girl manga fandom I mentioned above, ironically enough, has issues with sidelining a subtextually canonical f/f ship in favor of splitting the pair to put them in het ships. And the video game fandom used to have issues with slash shippers in what was a majority het fandom, and still has lingering issues with slash depending on which corners of fandom you frequent.

And yet, if I were to say “fandom has a problem with ignoring canonical queer subtext” or “fandom has a problem with inordinate aggression towards slash ships”, can you imagine the sort of ridicule I would face? Most people discussing social issues in fannish contexts would look at me as though I’d sprouted a second head, when those issues are in fact present and in need of discussion–just not in the large, obvious fandoms in the Tumblrsphere, which seem to be the only fandoms these people consider deserving of discussion.

My second point can be summed up in a single sentence: it is not the responsibility of fandom to correct the issues present in the source canon.

No canon is perfect. Creators are human, and flawed, and they will inevitably fuck up no matter how well they generally handle things. And while those fuckups do impact the way the fandom creates (see my first point), fandom does not have a duty to fix those fuckups. Fandom is not, and should not be, an activist space–it’s a creative space foremost, and it’s full of people with all sorts of baggage they pack in with them. It’s unfair, and arguably cruel, to force people to engage with aspects of canon they find squicky, or even triggering, to ‘correct’ flaws in canon that your “activism” takes issue with. (note: the link in the paragraph preceding this is mostly talking about shipping activism and while it makes some points about slash I disagree with, it makes plenty of good points about other sorts of fannish activism and the way fans who take their activism too far impact other fans and people unfamiliar with the source media)

And, additionally: unless you’re paying them, fan creators don’t owe you content. Yes, even if they primarily create for that dreaded noncanon m/m ship and you’d rather they make content for your favored f/f ship. Yes, even if your favored ship is actually canon, because there’s absolutely nothing wrong with shipping noncanon ships rather than canon ones–if I kept that mentality I wouldn’t create at all. If you want content, you have to make it yourself, or commission it.

And, my final point: if you don’t enjoy things certain fandoms are doing, learn to use your blacklist and filters.

If, like the op of the post I’m complaining about, you’re tired of the proliferation of slash ships you have ideological disagreements with, blacklist them and the fandoms that produce them! If there are particular common aus in a fandom you hate, figure out the tags and filter those! Particular ‘hot takes’ you’re sick of seeing? Seas of endless shitposts that make you roll your eyes? One particular writer who does a ship you otherwise enjoy in a notably squicky way? Blacklist, filter, and block.

Because I guarantee you, no matter how many angry posts you make about people making content you personally dislike, you won’t make anyone stop producing it.

And you might even piss some of them off.

Now if you’ll all excuse me, I have a non-canon slash fic to work on.

#fannish salt #salt #this is absolutely not something i usually do and i don't intend to repeat the performance #but i was so pissed off yesterday i was literally seeing red #like!!! gods!!!!!!#just because mainstream live action american media franchises dominate tumblr #that doesnt mean issues those fandoms have are applicable to every other fandom everywhere!!!#and if you insist they are youre a fucking idiot and i wont apologise for saying it #like its beyond reductive to pretend theyre universally applicable #and frankly by assuming that worldview you miss a lot of issues actually present in the media in question #like the structural issues in vlds narrative that thoroughly borked their second and third arcs #and caused the surface issues that so much of the fandom fusses about rather than looking a little deeper for the common threads #but thats another post for another day

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scientifically-strange · 7 years

Text

What’s it Like?

Trying something a little new. Instead of third person it’s straight from Danny’s pov

------------------------

What’s it like?

I always find myself getting asked this, whether it be from Tucker, Dani, Sam, or hell, even Valerie sometimes. And while it doesn't upset me, the question itself is hard to answer, and is tiring to do so after having to do it so many times.

So what is it like living with the Avengers?

It’s indescribable, really. It’s fun, and annoying, and stressful, and happy, and so many other words, so I think the only way I can properly tell you is if I list them all off one by one.

Well, let me tell you.

First, I guess I should start with the host himself, Tony Stark. Though you probably know him better as Iron Man.

He’s everything people say he is, and more. He’s selfish and sarcastic, and is stupidly smart. Yeah, he’s also a playboy, and he never focuses on the important stuff for his company. Instead he pays with desk toys in important meetings.

Like all of us, Tony has a lot of baggage. We all have our demons, but Tony’s are arguably the worst. Yeah, I fought my older evil self and the ghost king, and Steve was in World War II, but compared to Tony it was a cakewalk. Because Tony’s been through a fucking blender. He’s got serious PTSD from the Incident, from the cave he was tortured in, and a few other things. He copes by drinking unhealthy amounts of coffee spiked with alcohol and monster energy drinks while building several more Iron man armors, all with their own special skills and weapons.

He also has really bad attachment issues due to his father was never really around, and the father figure he did had tried to kill him. So.

However, despite all of that, Tony is probably the most caring person on the team. And that’s including Steve. He just doesn’t know how to express it with emotions. So instead, he uses his actions. Thor mentioned one time that he needed to get more lavender (?) shampoo because he ran out, and now there’s a cabinet full of them, just for the thunder god himself.

There was another time when Clint’s hearing aids got blown up on a mission, and Tony made him everything-proof Stark hearing aids. Clint hasn’t needed a new pair since. And he made Steve and Sam’s rooms soundproof, so that when fireworks go off they can still enjoy the view, but now with less gunshot sounds.

Tony also really loves to nerd out, which brings me to my next friend, Dr. Bruce Banner. He’s pretty soft spoken, until he starts talking about science. I remember the longest conversation I’ve had with him was when we were talking about space and NASA, which somehow ended up on a conversation of the horrible structure of hot dog buns? Not really sure what happened there...

Bruce always has great advice, and is always in like, a zen sort of mood. He’s not nervous all the time like most people think. No, he’s only fidgety around stressful people, like Fury or Ultron. Which is perfectly understandable considering if he gets to angry or freaked he starts looking a little green around the gills.

That being said, Bruce also makes the best tea on the Compound. Nobody knows what he does to it, but if you’re having a rough day or something he’s got your back. And he’s always got Tony’s back, too. I There was one time when Tony had been up for almost four days and Bruce had come in and put some headphones on Tony, and he passed out immediately. I helped him get Tony to his room, and Bruce kind of took it from there.

Hulk is pretty nice to. Though, to be fair the first time I met him he was pretty pissed because he couldn’t hit me. But after he calmed down enough, I told him a couple of jokes and he kind of warmed up to me.

And I told him I could help get the glitter out of his hair.

He still doesn’t know that it sparkles sometimes when crime-fighting. Nobody else has either, but that’s only because they’re to busy kicking ass themselves.

Steve is kind of like everybody’s dream guy, even if you yourself are a straight guy. He is 240 pounds of All-American beefcake with a heart of gold. His hair is pretty soft too.

He’s caring, but I’ve recently learned that he;s a little shit.

You would expect Captain America to be the perfect man, soldier, superhero, whatever. But he isn’t. I don’t even know where anybody got that idea.

This guy has a police record that’s longer than a list of Mr. Lancer’s book-swears. And he has the worst mouth on him. He stubbed his toe the other day and was cursing up a storm. However, he was cursing in Gaelic. I asked him about it and he said it was his first language due to his parents being Irish immigrants. I hadn't known that before, so that was really nice to know. But it also explained his accent. He had a lot of Brooklyn in it, but every now and then the Gaelic would slip through with it, making for a weird verbal cocktail that never sounded quite right.

He also has the worst mind out of all of us. It’s worse than Tuckers. His mind may be the gutter, but Steve’s is the fucking sewer. He was telling me about how he thought fondue equaled sexy times, and like? Literally, where did you make that connection? How many other foreign words has he heard and thought it was something sexual?

It shouldn’t surprise me though, considering he was in the army.

I could go on and on about Steve’s mouth and reckless behavior, but he, like Tony, has serious PTSD. A lot of it is from the war. He doesn’t like fireworks or loud, sudden noises unless he’s on the battlefield. There was one time I saw him mute a movie during a scene with a train, and I was going to ask him why, but then I saw that far away look in his eyes. It wasn’t my place to pry.

There’s also something about the sound of Tony’s repulsors powering up, too. It makes Steve tense up like a cat every time he hears it.

His coping methods are a bit healthier than Tony’s. He likes to draw his thoughts and feelings out. He’s damn good at it to, and while that’s a great thing, sometimes he falls asleep with them open, halfway done, and the shit he draws is so dark and depressing. I kind of worry about him sometimes.

But Sam’s been helping him though a lot of it. He was stationed overseas for a while before coming back to the states, only to get caught up in the fight again a few years later. He didn’t really seem to mind though. In fact, he seemed happy to do so. Whether or not that was from Captain America asking him to, or because he missed flying, I had no idea.

But I’ll be damned if I ever go to the park with him again.

His name is Falcon. He has cool metal wings he uses to fly. That all makes sense, right?

So how the fuck is he talking to pigeons?

I am genuinely worried that one day Sam till take over the world with birds, and h will have them shit on people’s cars and peck out the eyes of Hydra. Or something on the lines of that. However, if he is actually going to do that I think he needs a cooler bird.

Like a Falcon.

And as weird as that was, it doesn’t match up to the awkwardness of meeting Natasha “Million Alias” Romanoff. She’s as deadly as she is beautiful, and if I was into her in any way I would probably pay her to beat me up.

It never actually occurred to me that she’s not always being a spy? I mean, yeah, she’s always looking at the ulterior motive, because anyone with her background (which we will not speak of, so don;t even ask) would do the same. But she’s also a shitposting meme generator and has a really popular vine account even though vine is dead? Then again this is Natasha we’re talking about. I don;t wanna know how she does what she does.

She also steals clothes. SO far she’s stolen one of Tony’s hoodies, a pair of Clint’s sweatpants, a scrunchie from Thor, and one of my old Dumpty Humpty shirts I got at a concert. She also cheats at Monopoly and Cards Against Humanity. I haven’t figured out how she’s done it, but I know she does. Nobody, and I mean nobody, can just fucking win seventeen times in a row. You;d have to be a mind reader to do that shit. Jesus.

She’s terrifying, and honestly, every time I see her glare the fear of Thor runs through me, but a good portion of that goes away when she’s around Clint. And honestly> I can’t blame her. Clint, out of all of the Avengers I live with, is probably the one I hang out with the most. He’s super chill, and covered head to toe in bandages and has to have an entire pot of coffee just to stay awake. Also, he’s deaf? I had no idea during the Battle of New York, but later I found out that it was because they had broken and his new ones hadn’t come in yet. He’s taught me a lot of sign language so far, and Tucker makes fun of me for practicing it when I’m back in Amity.

Clint also has a lot of nests.

He has one on top of the fridge, in the A that’s on the outside of the building, a couple of key spots in the vents, and a board room on the 27th floor under the table because nobody ever uses it and it has a nice view of the sandwich shop right across the street. I’m sure he has more, but those are just the ones that I’ve found.

Also, his dog is not cuter than Cujo, don’t listen to that asshole.

Even though Clint chooses to keep his hearing aids out half the time, he still knows when Thor has come back from Asgard. Every single time, no matter where we’re at in the building, he just knows. It’s like a sixth sense. His head perks up, and he gets a dumb grin on his face, but then it quickly falls when he remembers that he ate the rest of the thunder god’s poptarts.

Thor is really fun to be around. And while I haven’t had a lot of quality bonding time with the dude, Dani has. They sit around and braid each other’s hair all the time, talking about flowers and giant monsters and space. Really, they’re best friends. And it’s adorable.

Don’t tell Jazz I said that.

There are aspects of Thor that remind me a little bit of all of the Avengers. Like Natasha, he can be cunning when he wants to. He’s always got the munchies like Clint, and has great advice like Bruce. Similar to Tony he also struggles with his own demons. But he seems to be most like Steve.

That being said, they are both huge little shits.

See, Thor likes to prank people. Half the time he uses Mojo (I don;t know how to pronounce the hammer’s name, okay) to fuck with us. I remember he and Natasha handing different house members his hammer while Natasha video taped it. He gets a huge kick out of watching us fall over. I remember when he did it to Steve, who was to zoned out in his paper to even realize what Thor had asked him to hold. He was gobsmacked for a whole week.

He hasn’t done it to me yet, and I have no idea if that’s because he hasn’t gotten around to it or because he’s still obsessed over me technically being royalty since I beat Pariah Dark, the former king. The first time we met he got down on one knee and bowed. It was the most surreal experience of my life, and that’s including when Tucker had to wear a chicken costume to a Dumpty Humpty concert because he lost a bet to Sam.

Every time he comes back from Asgard, we shake. But we don’t shake like normal people. It’s a sort of cultural thing. Instead of shaking hands we grip each other’s forearms and squeeze. I kind of like doing that better than a handshake. It seems way cooler.

So, you ask me what it’s like to live with the Avengers?

Living with them, it feels familiar, like it;s the one thing I’ve been missing my whole life.

It’s family.

---------

Also, OC week submissions are open officially if you want me to write them in with a DP and marvel!

#danny phantom #avengers #crossover #drabble #fan ficiton #dp x marvel

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gooberjam · 7 years

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gimme a full rundown on how u feel abt dirkjohn

it’s weird and stupid but man i got into dirkjohn around when i really needed that shit i think. they say you like relationships that you want in your life and man i guess that’s true

i just really like how it’s not over the top relationship shit. like it’s just dirk and john being idiots together with relationship things sprinkled on top. and i like how it’s not OVERT, like relationship-y things are all stuff i figure they’d keep private and both would feel most comfortable not sharing with the world because it is not like there is any reason to share it any ways

and yeah it’s silly but it could potentially also be really good because they’re both depressed idiots but in different manners, dirk where he is constantly aware of how much he hates himself and john in subconsciously feeling very much kind of worthless and out of place.

but they both also push through their depressed states for others. in a lot of senses actually, they’re weirdly similar, but their love for their friends is where they most strongly connect, and also to a degree is almost a reason for their depressed states of mind?? like dirk feels like he doesn’t deserve his friends and how good they are, and john feels out of place in his friend group because all of his friends are so good and capable and talented and he does not necessarily see that in himself.

they both need their friends for a sense of purpose

i also feel like it would be really good for john to be with dirk because dirk has that tendency to push his friends to grow and improve themselves, which is something john REALLY needs because he gives up easily when it comes to stuff that purely involves him and no one else. he gave up his past interests like programming and magic tricks because it was difficult, and if his consistency in pointing out how shitty his drawing is is any indication of how he acts abt his other talents, it’s smth he really beats himself up abt. and because he is john and incredibly headstrong, it’s hard to push him to keep going

which is where dirk would be good because he’s also very stubborn and wouldn’t take john’s horse shit.

john would also be good with dirk because dirk worries about how his actions affect others, especially since his friend group is not necessarily super open about sharing that sort of stuff. the alpha group in general is pretty piss poor at communication.

john, however, is very vocal about how he feels about things and people and will say and HAS said what he thinks straight to peoples faces. he has no tolerance for horse shit, and is not scared to pipe up when it comes to his opinion on shit. dirk would appreciate that and need it. i feel like it would be a source of comfort and reassurance.

i feel like in general dirk would like how strongly john carries his voice and who he is, and john (if his history of romantic interests is anything to go off of) in turn is very much attracted to confident personas with drive and passion (vriska, roxy, [terezi also apparently???])

also you have to admit john has a strange pull towards southern characters?? cameron poe?? like most every character matthew mcconaughey plays??? i mean considering the dude has a WALL dedicated to matthew mcconaughey movie posters that has to say something

plus dirk and john both really like over the top action/drama shit.

a lot of people think the ship is exclusively shitpost content but honestly if you think through their personalities and stuff they’re weirdly compatible? idk i just really love them and the relationship god bless em

#dirkjohn #asks #ask meme #long post #Anonymous

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phoenixyfriend · 7 years

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Okay! Tagged by @tozettewrites to list ten of your favourite Naruto ships and tag ten people.

1. SasuKarin: the OTP. I will die on this hill, probably. They have the most interesting potential dynamic between characters in the manga, I think, and even the parts that are explicitly shown on screen are just??? They match each other in a lot of awful, broken ways. These two are both made of shards of glass, but the shards kind of fit together, if they try hard enough, or at least Sasuke’s Katon can melt them to something malleable if he’s bothering to pay attention. They’re both survivors of awful tragedies, used and abused by the people they worked for, and the spent a couple months/a year just wandering around the continent together (and with Juugo and Suigetsu). They aren’t a good-to-go ship, not with everything that happened in canon, but the process of working through that is one of my favorite things to write, so... yeah. SK for the win.

2. InoHina: When talking about femslash ships, people don’t bring this one up much? Which is terrible, because it’s one of those ‘we’ve barely seen you interact, but what we know about you individually makes the idea of you two together really appealing.’ Ino is very, very pushy as a person, but once she decides your one of her people, you’re there for life, and she will defend you like an angry swan: beautiful and utterly terrifying. Hinata is a shrinking violet, sure, but if she likes you enough, she will do anything to keep you safe. And I think that Ino’s habit of pushing people to be better versions of themselves, whether through friendly support (Sakura) or providing a rival (also Sakura) or just plain nagging (her team) would work really well for Hinata, while Hinata would be exactly the kind of soft, supportive presence that Ino needs after metaphorically pushing people all day.

3. NaruGaa: I guess I just really like the idea of the two of them sort of... circling in on each other? Emotionally? Like, they’re both jinchuuriki, had shitty lives, etc, and it’s been addressed ad nauseum how they contrast and how it makes both of them grow as people and I could go on but I think at this point we all know why people would ship these two

4. HakuSaku: I don’t have an explanation. I just saw it this one time and went “Yeah, that’s a good thing. Haku and Sakura would be great together.”

5. HidaDei: I wrote a 64-chapter fanfic about these two and at this point all I can really say is that they are equally terrible people whose flavor of terrible meshes unnervingly well together, and they’d probably have fantastic sex.

6. ShikaSai: I wrote this ship in to the background of said HidaDei fic five years ago. It’s still in my head. It’s still a good ship. They are both utterly laidback in entirely different ways, but if you piss of either of them you end up with a meticulously-planned revenge of epic proportions. Shikamaru will glare and then give you a classy one-liner after he’s kicked your ass, while Sai will smile the whole time and then mock you at the end, but there will be planning. And they’d do very well at the whole ‘what do we do when we’re not on a date’ aspect of things. Shika likes to watch clouds, Sai likes to draw, and if you sit them under a tree then you will probably find them there five hours later, covered in leaves that fell onto them that they were too lazy to brush off.

7. InoSaiSaku: If you can’t imagine how gloriously fabulous and catty and deadly this trio would be, I can’t help you.

8. SuiKiba: This is another “I don’t know, I just thought of it this one time and now it’s there to stay.”

9. JiraTsu: Tragic and self-explanatory, I imagine.

10. ZabuMei: I’m running out of ships I actually give a shit about, have another shitpost.

Tagging; @firebirdeternal @blackkatmagic @quantumghosts @the-roadkill-cafe @minakushi @electraposts @redhothollyberries @glacialis-hiems @penpalpixie @sayla-aris (I tagged people I barely know and people that have already been tagged because I just... don’t know that many Naruto fans that aren’t also friends with Toz, apparently.)

#Naruto #fandom stuff #shipping #Phoenix Answers Memes #Phoenix Posts

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