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strawbeerossi · 7 months

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The Ballad Of Dr. Reid

Pairing: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid

Description: When you zone out in the middle of one of your lectures, your professor asks you to stay after class to check in on you.

Content/Warnings: Power imbalance, Professor/Student, age gap (Spencer is in his 40s, reader is in her 20s), minor hand kink, porn with little plot, heated kissing, fingering, spit, unprotected sex, exhibitionism (kinda, right?), reader gets a facial

Word Count: 1.9K

Kinktober Day Two: Power Imbalance

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You’d always had a liking for criminal justice, so taking the courses in college seemed like a no brainer. You really liked Criminology 1424. It was an interesting class, one that piqued your interest far more than the other classes you were in the process of taking.

In addition to being genuinely interested in the subject, you were more interested in the professor of the class; Dr. Spencer Reid.

He was soft spoken for the most part, a little on the awkward side but that was okay. He was experienced from his fifteen years in the Behavioral Analysis Unit and would use cases he’d faced for examples in his lessons. His lectures were long and albeit pretty boring at times but you had no problem watching the man at the front of class talk, his hands emphasizing just how prepared he was for the topic at hand. You’d realized that there were topics he definitely enjoyed getting into, his body language and his overexaggerated gestures being proof of it.

You’d always thought the FBI and the darkness he faced on a near daily basis would exhaust him, make him harder and more stoic, the seriousness of the world on his shoulders. No, instead he offered smiles, helped any student who came to him, and was painfully oblivious to the amount of young men and women auditing the class just to admire the attractive professor.

It was like any other lecture, delving into the intricacies of triggers and what could bring them on. It was a lesson he liked, judging by his animation this evening. You’d done your best to keep up, to get plenty of notes jotted down due to this being on the impending final. However, you were too busy drooling over the curly haired beauty, his veined hands flailing with each word that fell from his lips.

What you wouldn’t give to have those hands on your body, to feel the gentle touch of your professor as he was letting his fingertips memorize all the dips and curves of your body, to familiarize himself with how to pleasure you.

His hands on-

“Y/N? Are you alright?”

You were snapped from your thoughts. The sound of your name falling from his mouth was like sweet honey, drizzling over your eardrums as you could feel your face heat up from embarrassment. Great. Now the whole class is looking at you.

“Y-Yes, I’m okay. I’m sorry, just, uh, not all the way here today.” You explained, slowly looking back down at the notebook covered in scribbles. So much for getting any work done today.

The class passed by painfully slowly after that. Even the attractive man in front of you didn’t seem to speed up the clock. You’d sat quietly, giving up with the notes aspect as you’d switched to doodling on the edges of your notebook. You’d done your best to try and be one of the first ones out whenever your professor dismissed the class full of students. However your shoulders slumped with defeat when the sea of bodies filed out first.

There was no clean getaway.

“Y/N, do you mind staying back and having a chat?”

Fuck.

Mustering up enough courage to face the man you’d gotten distracted fantasizing about, you were approaching his desk. Even up close, he was a beautiful man. Even in his early to mid forties, he still looked delicious. “I apologize for getting distracted earlier. I was just-”

“Looking at me? Y/N,” There was a deep breath that left his lips. “You can tell me if this tie is ugly. My coworker Penelope insisted I wear it. I love her but some of her ties aren’t really my style.”

He was joking, easing the awkwardness and the unknown tension filling the lecture hall. Maybe he’d been feeling the same way about you. He looked at you a lot as is, however you may have just been in a delusional state of mind right now. There was a hope that Spencer would reciprocate those feelings. “It’s not.. It’s a little ugly but that, uh, wasn’t what I was, uh, staring at.” You decided to just be honest. Worst you can do is transfer out of the class.

Or run away to a new city, start over again at a new university.

“Really?”

“Really. Sir, with the risk of coming across as inappropriate, it’s hard to pay attention to you at the front of the class. It’s not a bad thing. You just always look…” You paused and gave him a once over. “Really nice.” You spoke.

There was a blush that spread across the older man’s cheeks, an eyebrow raising. “You think so? At risk of sounding even more inappropriate and unprofessional,” He paused as he leaned forward a bit, arms crossed over his chest. “It’s hard to teach when you come in looking as beautiful as you do. Makes me just wanna stare at you the whole class.”

The words were lower than usual, a rush of warmth going straight to your core from the mere compliment.

“Plus when you come in with a new lipstick shade..” His lanky body was pushing off the desk before he approached, his fingers resting gently under your chin before tilting it upwards. “It drives me insane. You may think I don’t notice but…” This was crossing the boundary of teacher and student, his thumb swiping over your lower lip. “I do. Makes me think of these pretty lips wrapped around me, those eyes glossed over with pleasure.” He hummed, chuckling at the way your breath hitched, eyes locking with his.

You didn’t know what came over you at this point, however you could help yourself as you were launching yourself forward, mouth smashing against his in a quick kiss that he seemed enthusiastic to reciprocate. His hands were gripping your waist, pulling your frame closer to his chest as the kiss filled with desire and hunger was escalating.

The next thing you knew, you were being sat against the desk at the front of the lecture hall, your eyes widening. “H-Hold on, don't you have another class??” She asked immediately as she let her hands squeeze the broad shoulders. “Yeah, in twenty minutes.” Spencer responded, hands trailing to the waistband of the pants you were wearing. The thought of having sex in a hall where anyone could walk in at any point was enough to send a shiver down your spine. You weren’t one for exhibitionism normally, however you weren’t gonna turn this down.

“Fuck it.” Your words made a grin spread across Spencer’s face, his lips pressing a chaste kiss against your lips while working on getting your pants pulled off, panties following in one swift motion. Licking his hand, the older male didn’t waste any time before moving the wet hand between your legs, his spit working as lube as he wanted to make sure you were wet enough for the deed. Lord knows that he didn’t want you tearing at any point.

The feeling of his fingers brushing against your clit had already sent electricity through your body, a light gasp escaping your lips.

“Such a pretty girl, bet you haven’t ever had any man pay attention to you, huh? I can only imagine you’ve been with selfish little boys who haven’t even attempted to bring you to orgasm..” He sighed playfully, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips once more. He was addicted, drinking in your moans as his thumb was massaging your clit, one finger pushed deep in your weeping hole while he was working you open.

This was definitely something new, you didn’t really sleep around so the few times you’d engaged in casual sex were quick, rushed. You sure as hell knew that the past couple of dudes couldn’t even find your clit. You were intoxicated on his touch the small movements he made eliciting moans and gasps into his mouth. With your hips rolling against the touch, you let your eyes flutter shut.

“As much as I hate to stop, we’ve got fifteen minutes and I’m dying to be inside of you.” He murmured against your lips, his hands moving to undo his belt before tugging his pants down his legs, boxers being pulled down soon after. The sight of his hard cock had your full attention. “Ready? You’re sure you want to keep going?”

“Yes!” You rasped, making him chuckle while his large hands were spreading your thighs apart, letting a trail of his spit fall onto your pussy before he was giving himself a few tugs. The thick tip of his shaft was spreading the spit onto your cunt, a hum falling from his lips. So pretty. God, I hate having to crunch time like this.” He groaned while letting the thick head push into your hole, your mouth falling open at the delicious burn that came with the stretch of your inner walls. If only you knew about your professor’s cock sooner.. All the stress of studying for quizzes would’ve been a million times easier.

His hips snapped without warning, a loud moan falling from your mouth while the male couldn’t help but chuckle as he quickly clasped a hand over your mouth. “Shh. Can’t have anyone hearing you.” His hand barely did justice to hide your moans and cries as his hips continued to roughly thrust, the desk rocking steadily with each movement.

“Fuck. It’s like this pussy was made for me, look at the way she takes my cock and is desperate for more. So greedy.” The vulgar words from your otherwise sweet and seemingly innocent man’s mouth was strangely attractive, attractive to a level that your inner walls were spasming around the hard cock nestled deep inside of you, so far you felt like he was hitting your cervix. Then again, you could’ve just been exaggerating.

With your fingernails digging into his clothed shoulders, you could feel a knot in your stomach, tightening so tight that you felt like the floodgates were going to burst open.

“I-I’m gonn-” You stuttered, words muffled against his hand while Spencer nodded.

“I’m almost there. Cum for me.” His words were husky, tone dripping with ecstasy as he let out a low groan.

As your pussy clenched tightly around his cock, the both of you were letting out a mixture of groans, mons and even a few whimpers slipping from the older man’s lips. It was all too much, finally letting the dam break as you were letting your head fall back, mouth agape as your thighs were shaking, your creamy arousal making a ring around his cock.

There was a little whine at the emptiness you felt when his cock wasn’t inside of you, the male opting to gently move you from the desk before putting you on your knees. “Look at you. Fuck. Stick your tongue out for me. Make sure you close your eyes too. I don’t wanna give you any infections.” Even in a huffing and panting mess, he looked out for you.

Doing as you were told, you let your mouth fall open while your eyes fluttered shut, the male groaning at the sight as he roughly fisted at his cock. There was only a few pumps before his cock was twitching, it being his turn for his head to fall back as he was painting your face with his spent. The load was a lot more than you expected.

Maybe he needed this just as bad as you did.

As the act was coming to an end, Spencer was trying to catch his breath while tugging up his pants and boxers. He’d retrieved a few tissues from his desk before leaning down to wipe your face, a light hum leaving his lips. “Maybe you can talk to me about some extra notes you could add to your doodle book. Say over coffee tomorrow morning?”

“Deal.”

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a-world-with0ut-dr34ms · 8 months

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Ghost x Civilian!Reader

You notice something on Ghost's mask while walking. Or rather you wanted an excuse to be near him.

SFW, Extreme Fluff, Comfort, Drabble, One-shot, Intimacy, Romance, Sappy as hell, Maybe melodramatic, they're in love, Soft!Reader and Soft!Ghost, Scarcely Proofread, a bit random and aimless, domestic Ghost, Reminiscing

WC: 1.1k~

꒰ · ◡ · ꒱ masterlist

"Hold up!"

You extend your arm before Ghost, stopping him on his trail with your puny figure. Or rather puny against the giant brick house that had been Simon Riley himself. Whether he had been two inches taller than you or two feet, you never let that keep you from his side, and he couldn't be more grateful for it.

Still, the man damn near stumbles into your arm when you've stopped him. How you managed to hold your ground with him having nearly toppled you over would continue to impress him.

You needn't bother with such dramatically silly gestures to halt him where he stands; one long look your way proved enough to barely leave him with a breath to spare, with all the air around him always so wrapped tightly in your meaningful gaze.

"Wha' is it?" he asks you curiously. "Did you forget something?"

"No, it's just-"

You look upon him inquisitively, brows furrowing with a playful pout on your lips. Your eyes bounce up and down over his masked face, a normal occurrence, though it's only when you do it that Ghost ever feels shy behind it. As though no amount of fabrics or masks he obscured himself in could hide from you, which may as well be true.

Every day he spends with you, he finds himself more at peace with the monotony of his life. With you so near and ready to accept him for who he'd grown to be, even something as mundane as walking to the coffee shop for tea early in the morning felt more heavenly than any promised afterlife.

As Ghost slips his hands back into his coat pockets, with his broad shoulders slouched ever so slightly to meet your eyes, he can't help but smile, curious as to what idle thoughts ran through you.

"Don't think too hard now," he teases. "Y'might hurt yourself, love."

"Oh, be quiet you."

You gently laugh, your shoulders bouncing as animatedly as your eyes. "There's just something-"

You reach over and let your hands gently pull at the edges of his mask against his chin, inviting yourself into his space and leaning forward. Had you been anyone else, had he not flinched at the sudden movement, then he certainly would have disallowed such an action and stepped back.

Too many abuses of his boundaries have made that road a gated and lonely route to traverse. One you've walked merrily on with little guidance beyond your own admirable patience and kindness.

Who knows what you may have seen on his mask if anything at all. Ghost would never cast aside a moment to be so near so gently. Your thumb rub softly at the corners of the fabric, wiping whatever smudge had been there.

It's these smallest of actions you make that put him most at ease. How sweetly you hold him to you, hands gently caressing over his cheeks to groom him as though he were your own kin.

His mother would do the same when he was younger. He couldn't step ten feet out the door without her stopping him to retuck his shirt back in or help him rub the sleep from his eyes. Anything for her eldest to be the best he could be.

She only ever wanted the best for him, and through each touch and shared glance he has with you, he knows that you share that sentiment. The amount of time it's been since someone else has truly filled that void felt cruel beyond measure with you in his life now, so readily and with ease.

In many ways, you reminded him of her, with all her best qualities shining through the smallest comforts and care you shared for him.

Ghost remains still. In front of you on the sidewalk, a silent huff leaves him, and the cold autumn air begins to settle with the evening sun taking with it its warmth. It makes the hues of browns in his eyes shine like bark and moss, the blonds of his eyelashes twinkling against the light at certain angles like small sparkles.

It makes you pause every so often, always taking careful note of each detail of him, in which the most delicate parts of himself had been gifted to you.

He only does the same, catching the faint twinge of your lip, or how your ears move at every small expression you make. If you'd let him -- which you have on your deepest of nights -- Simon could gaze upon you until you'd imprinted yourself into his mind like a waking dream. Anything to take with him what he could not hold with you away.

Days such as this have been all he's needed on his worst assignments to soldier on. Your presence had brought him that much peace of mind.

Your hands wipe, pull, and adjust his mask with light intention, Ghost never once fearing that your hands would overstep and attempt to unmask him outside. You knew as well as he -- the softness he felt beneath his mask was a sight he wanted for your eyes only.

After some more seconds pass, you stop adjusting his mask, though your hands remain cradling his cheeks in your palms. Your eyes haven't left him for just as long, your lips only a short reach forward.

Knowing he'd be unable to kiss you, Ghost instead lets himself lean in, until his forehead adorably presses against yours, resting there with a soft exhale of the nose.

You sigh happily, letting your hands rest against your neck and your heart flutter joyously.

"I love you," you say.

You said so a lot, and at times you feared you might cheapen its value, even as you meant it each time. But Ghost could never tire of your words. If you said it a thousand more times, he'd only say so to you a thousand more back. For all the times in his life he's never had someone beside him to say it to, when he wished to most of all.

"I love you too," he says.

Somehow his voice always sounded a bit more brittle when the words leave him. Like if he said them any louder, he might just lose himself completely. But just as somehow the same, he bounces back. "Did you find what you were looking for?"

You nod. "I did." And then you lean forward and plant a gentle kiss on his nose. The softest thing imaginable; it could turn even the coldest of men into the most fragile of creatures.

What it was you saw, both on and in him, he needn't know or understand. He wouldn't ask, and he wouldn't worry. Simon would just... be.

But forever the playful tease you aimlessly had been, you twirl away back down the sidewalk, continuing your morning journey.

"Now for some tea!" You cheer.

Ghost chuckles lightly, and then slowly follows along. Some tea would be nice right about now.

´･ᴗ･`

I think I might do more artwork with my stories from now on. Little drabbles to go with them. I kind of like it. I've got a few Gaz ones coming next!

#simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley fanart #simon riley #ghost simon riley #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #call of duty #modern warfare ii #call of duty modern warfare ii #mwii #mw2022 #call of duty modern warfare 2 #ghost call of duty #mw2 ghost #ghost cod #ghost fanart #sketch #Spotify

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lovelytsunoda · 3 months

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by my side // yuki tsunoda

a kitchen filled with the sounds of love and laughter

pasta always tastes sweeter when made together after a long week at work. all she wants is to bask in his sunshine. and hes all too glad to share his light with her

pairing: yuki tsunoda x reader

warnings: confessions of love, I guess? like none of these have serious warnings on them!!

she couldn't remember being this happy.

the sun was setting just past her window, a radio on the counter- yes, a real radio- playing the oldies station, u2's 'i still haven't found what i'm looking for' playing softly as the onions sizzled on the stove.

her cat nuzzles up against her bare ankle, purring softly as it pawed at her foot. yuki comes up behind her, wrapping his strong, warm arms around her body.

she had never felt more safe than she did in his arms.

"smells incredible, darling."

"yuki, i've barely done anything." she chuckled, reaching for the jar of tomato sauce. "you're the chef here, wanna give me a hand?"

"nope." yuki shook his head, his nose cold against her skin as he buried his face in her neck. they were the same height, a match made in awkward and adorable heaven.

she knew that it wouldn't last. yuki was way too particular about his kitchen. (well, this kitchen was hers) all it took was one pour of the tomato sauce jar for yuki to spring into action, gnetly prying the can from her hands.

"babe." he pouted. "that's not how you do it. you're going to get pasta sauce all over yourself."

"that's the yuki i know." she smiled, slipping out of his arms to pick up her cat from the ground. "take it away, romeo."

yuki laughed, moving to stand in front of the stove, stirring the sauce as it boiled. “technically, agatha christie shouldn’t even be in the kitchen.”

she faked a pout, looking at the shorthair cat in her arms. “hear that, agatha? he’s trying to kick you out of your own kitchen!”

yuki made a face before scratching agatha behind the ears and turning back to the stove. giggling to herself, she tiptoed out of the kitchen with agatha christie in her arms, placing the cat back on her climbing fairy tree. yuki had helped her out it together on their third date, right after coffee and dog yoga (she always took her coffee sweet, iced and with milk and caramel syrup).

she never thought she would be this lucky. yuki was the sweetest man she’d ever met, and the best cook. it was like dating a best friend. even the most mundane tasks felt like bug things with him: going out for ice cream, pushing a shopping cart around ikea.

she knew it was still early, but he knew her inside and out (physically and mentally) and she had never felt this way for anybody else before.

she was in love with yuki tsunoda.

and she didn't know how to tell him.

she watched for a moment as he lifted a large pot onto the countertop, the veins in his arms flexing as he did so (whoever said short guys weren't sexy was a goddamn liar).

"help me with the pasta, love?" yuki hummed, flicking the light over the stovetop on.

she smiled, turning up the radio before she grabbed the box of penne noodles from the counter. placing one hand on yuki's back, she stepped around him and kissed him softly on the lips. he hummed into it, a strong hand cradling her waist.

"i love you." she whispered. there was no plan to how she said it, no thought that crossed her mind where she thought 'i have to tell him'. three simple words that made all the difference, spoken like they were a normal thing for them.

yuki smiled. "i love you." he said softly, his lips brushing over hers, breath warm on her skin.

she pulled away briefly to turn the gas stove on, the blue fames warming the bottom of the water pot. she stepped away from the stove, bringing yuki with her as the song changed, a slow, romantic ballad beginning to play.

"i love this song." she smiles, reaching for yuki's hands. "dance with me?"

"always." he beamed, pulling her close and pressing a kiss to the crown of her head before they began to sway, inxs playing in the background.

she wouldn't have it any other way. it was moments like this that she dreamed of when she was younger. the small ones: cooking with the man that she loved, taking breaks to bask in each other's light, dancing to oldies music in the kitchen with nobody else around.

tired of watching from the sidelines, agatha christie jumped down from her perch, padding into the kitchen and nuzzling at yuki's leg. the couple paused their gentle dance, laughing as yuki reached down to pick up the cat.

"did somebody get jealous? you have to learn how to share your mom, agatha. because i have a feeling i'm going to be around a lot more often." yuki hummed, scratching behind agatha's ears.

the cat purred softly, burrowing into his black t-shirt.

"see, she loves you already." she giggled, using her phone to take a quick picture of the moment. she felt so content, so fulfilled. this was everything she had ever wanted in her quiet little life and more,

"not more than you do, i hope."

"never in a million years. i love you, yuki tsunoda." she laughed, leaning in to kiss him again.

TAGS:

@magnummagnussen @libraryofloveletters @lorarri @cartierre @thatsdemko @sidcrosbyspuck @scuderiamh @diorleclerc

#fools in love! event #yuki tsunoda #yuki tsunoda x reader #formula one imagine #formula one x reader #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 one shot #yuki tsunoda imagine #Spotify #mini fic

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ghostfacd · 6 months

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I’M HERE, I’M THERE, I’M EVERYWHERE | LUKE HUGHES

synopsis: in which capitol mentor luke hughes, falls inlove with his tribute, yn dubois.

song recommendation: can’t catch me now by olivia rodrigo

author’s note: in honor of the ballad of the songbirds coming out in the next 2 weeks and olivia’s amazing song, here is my favorite person (lukey warren hughes) in one of my favorite fictional books ever, the hunger games! this was so fun to write, and as always, enjoy <3

It was in the early years of the Hunger Games, where students at the academy in the Capitol were still allowed to train the incoming tributes from the district. Luke Hughes, a teenage boy who had been born and raised in the Capitol had finally achieved his lifelong dream; to mentor the awaiting tributes for the 6th Annual Hunger Games.

His best friend, Kelsey Ivies, shared his excitement, for they had both aspired to this role since they were kids. In their eyes, the Hunger Games were necessary, a punishment for the districts that had once rebelled, which had resulted in not only the loss of many lives in the District, but also in the Capitol. Luke’s grandfather was one of the victims, and he remembered how his father used to tell him when he was younger.

He hated the districts, they were like salt to a wound.

Luke's heart raced as he stepped into the training center, knowing that he was about to meet the tribute he'd be responsible for, a girl from District 2. His breath hitched as he laid eyes on her for the first time, shocked by her beauty.

“I’m Luke,” he says, placing out a hand for her to exchange. He’d never seen a district girl in his life, and it gave him a sense of adrenaline.

“I’m Y/N,” she says, her eyes felt like they were piercing through Luke’s insides. “Y/N Dubois from District 2.”

Over the weeks leading up to the Games, Luke and Y/N spent countless hours together, training and getting to know each other. He taught her how to differentiate berries, for some of them were poisonous in the arena. He had rewatched every single hunger games leading up to the one now, for he wanted to be the best mentor in his academy. He wanted to make his father proud, so that meant he had to make sure Y/N would come out the winner.

While they were practicing Y/N's swimming skills in a secluded lake, she playfully extended her arm out to him.

“Hey Luke,” she says, her smile loosely hanging on her lips.

He quirked his eyebrows, but nonetheless held her hand. He liked how it felt, anyway.

Suddenly, the girl yanked him into the water, making him let out a shriek of surprise, causing her to laugh hysterically. For the first time, Luke was able to see Y/N not as a tribute, but as a girl who he was falling in love with.

The following night, Luke managed to sneak Y/N out from the tribute cages, holding her hand tightly as the both tried not to giggle to loudly. The sky was clear and starry, and the two found themselves on the rooftop of a building, laying side by side. Luke’s hand brushed against Y/N’s as they gazed up at the night sky, away from the chaos and expectations that weighed on both of their shoulders. The stars above seemed to twinkle knowingly, as if they held secrets of their own.

Luke, who was normally reserved and didn’t talk much about his personal life, decided to open up to Y/N. If she were to die in the games anyways, it wouldn’t matter what she knew. His voice trembled as he spoke, "Y/N, there's something I've never told anyone before." He took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts. "My father, he's always expected me to be the best mentor, to uphold the Capitol's values and ideals. But it's suffocating, you know? The pressure, the constant scrutiny. He made me feel like I was never enough."

Y/N turned to him, her eyes filled with understanding and empathy. She took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "I can imagine how tough that must be, Luke."

Tears welled up in Luke's eyes as he continued, "I've always felt like I was living in his shadow. But being here with you, it's the first time I've felt like I could be myself. I don't have to pretend, and I don't have to meet anyone's expectations. For the first time, I feel free."

Y/N smiled warmly and leaned her head on Luke's shoulder. "I love you Luke."

He knew he couldn’t say it back, he couldn’t. He was from the Capitol, and she was merely a tribute. He could feel her stiffen beside him when she’s responded back with silence. He only wrapped his arm around her frame, pulling her in.

As the Games drew nearer, Kelsey noticed how Luke had become increasingly anxious and distraught.

She scoffed. “What, don’t tell me you’re falling inlove with her?”

Luke’s lips form a thin line, “why does it matter Kels?”

“Because it’s pathetic Luke.” The brunette girl laughs. “I mean, cmon, a mentor falling inlove with his tribute?”

Luke didn’t expect for his best friend to be so outright bitchy. “What game are you playing at Kelsey?” He grunts out.

“Nothing,” Kelsey shrugs. “But you’re playing a dangerous game here, Hughes.”

However, the unexpected had happened. A rebellion began to form among the tributes a day before the games were set to start.

Luke panicked, his eyes moving in a fast motion as he searched for the one person that mattered. Y/N, his Y/N.

He was shocked to find her in the crowd, along with the other rebelling tributes. When the peacekeepers start firing, Y/N, filled with fear and anger, made a run into the nearby woods, and Luke, driven by an need to go after her, followed.

Unbeknownst to Luke, Kelsey had watched this with her calculated eyes. Positioning a peacekeeper gun around her shoulders, she made her way into the woods after the pair.

When they caught up to Y/N, Luke was overwhelmed with emotions. "Y/N, you weren't supposed to rebel," he said with a mixture of anger and desperation.

Y/N, eyes bloodshot, stood baffled, looking him in the eyes. "The Games are evil, Luke. Evil. And you’ve just been brainwashed into thinking they're necessary.”

Kelsey, who had been lurking behind them, saw an opportunity waiting to be used. She sneered and positioned the gun in her hand, ready to put an end to the rebellion and silence the tribute that had been bringing her annoyance since her arrival at the Capitol. But before she could pull the trigger, a idea flashed in her mind. She thrust the gun into Luke's trembling hands, knowing this was going to make it all more satisfying.

"Shoot her, Luke," Kelsey hissed. "Or I'll rat you out for treason, and you’ll die with her.”

Luke was trapped. He felt like he couldn’t move, and his heart ached as he stared at Y/N, the girl he had come to love despite everything he had once stood for. With tears in his eyes, he reluctantly obeyed Kelsey's command and aimed the gun at Y/N.

Her eyes, now falling with tears had practically begged silently with his to not do it.

“Luke, Luke.” Y/N begs, “what happened to our swimming practices? Don’t you remember what you said to me that one night on the roof? Did it mean nothing, Luke?”

Tears streamed down Luke's face as his hands shook with the gun in them.

Kelsey puffs in annoyance, elbowing Luke harshly on the side. “Well? Are you gonna do it? Or do I have to shoot both of you?”

Luke closed his eyes as he pulled the trigger, and he watched the girl he once loved crumble to the floor, eyes that leaked tears earlier now remain lifeless.

She’s dead, and it was all his fault.

- - -

Luke suddenly woke up in a cold sweat, his body shoot up his bed.

He had been experiencing the same dreams of him shooting Y/N, only each time, it showed a new detail, one that struck every corner of his heart.

“Are you okay?” Luke’s mom had awoken from a loud sound in Luke’s room. She placed her hand on his forehead and frowned. “What happened?”

“I’m fine..” he says, although it seemed like he was reassuring himself more than he was her.

“You can’t bottle up your feelings forever.” She sighs, but she leaves him alone, thankfully.

He swears he sees her everywhere. In his dreams, in random people he sees at his academy. She’s everywhere, even in the meadow grass, or in the corner of his eyes.

Her face of betrayal never leaves Luke’s mind, staying ingrained like a portrait.

- - -

Years have passed since everything had occurred, and although Luke’s heart felt like it was ripped in two, he forced the memory of Y/N into the deepest parts of his brain, wanting to erase every memory of her.

He ended up marrying Kelsey, whom he had 2 kids with. Two boys named Hermes and Lucretius.

One evening as the family gathered to watch the latest Games on their holographic screens, Hermes and Lucretius were jumping in their seats with excitement.

“Mama! One day, me and Hermes will get to mentor a tribute too, right?” Lucretius says excitedly, holding onto Kelsey’s hand.

“Isn’t that right dad? Me and Lucre will be mentors!”

Luke and Kelsey exchanged a knowing glance. The memory of Y/N, flashed through Luke's mind for the first time in years, felt like a painful echo from the past. The ache in his heart remained.

Kelsey placed a reassuring hand on Luke's shoulder, “You know, it’s a pretty big position, takes a lot of responsibility," she said, trying to explain the weight of the role to their children.

Their youngest son, Hermes, looked at Luke with wide eyes, "Dad, did you ever mentor someone?"

Luke hesitated for a moment, his gaze distant. Finally, he replied, "Yes, I did once. I attended the same academy you guys are attending.”

Lucretius, always having been curious, continued, "What was it like, Dad? Was it fun? Did your tribute win?”

A heavy silence hung in the room as Luke reflected on the question. Kelsey squeezed his shoulder, before getting up to bring the dishes to the sink.

“I did my best, but sometimes, things don’t go as planned.”

Their children, oblivious to the hurt behind their father’s words continued to chat excitedly about the Games. But in that moment, as they watched the televised games, Luke’s brain couldn't help itself but revisit the past, his heart heavy with the memory of Y/N, and the lingering question of what could have been if he had chosen differently.

#luke hughes #luke hughes x you #luke hughes x y/n #luke hughes x oc #luke hughes fluff #luke hughes blurb #luke hughes fic #luke hughes x reader #luke hughes fanfic #luke hughes imagine #luke hughes imagines #luke hughes angst #luke hughes smut #hughes brothers #nhl x y/n #nhl x you #nhl x reader

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lurkingshan · 8 months

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A Time Called You: A Great Reminder to Go Watch Someday or One Day

This past weekend Netflix dropped a new kdrama called A Time Called You in its entirety, and I became particularly interested in watching it as soon as I realized what it was: the Korean remake of Someday or One Day I knew had been in the works for awhile. If you’re not familiar, Someday or One Day (SOOD) is a beloved 2019 Taiwanese drama that is widely considered to be among the best dramas the country has ever produced (there is also a 2022 film version of the story, but that’s less relevant to this post). Now, I love Korean dramas, and I know that countries remaking each other’s best shit is very common in the Asian media landscape, but I couldn’t help but feel protective of the original work and a bit resentful of the choice to adapt something that was so original and unique and specific and put that generic kdrama sheen on it. Taiwan has a small film industry, and this is one of its jewels. We didn’t need Korea’s take on it.

And having watched the adaptation in full now, I am feeling pretty justified in that initial feeling. Let me just say upfront: A Time Called You (ATCY) is a perfectly good drama with a solid cast and competent storytelling. Had I seen it absent the knowledge of what it was adapting, I probably would have liked it a lot. But I have already seen and loved Someday or One Day, so I feel compelled to break down why it is the better version of this tale, both for my fellow SOOD devotees who are wondering how this adaptation stacks up and for folks who have only seen the kdrama in the hopes that you’ll decide to watch the original. As usual, I did the most, so reader be advised that this is long (tagging @troubled-mind as promised and @smittenskitten because I saw you were looking for a comparison of the two dramas). TL; DR: if you liked ATCY, or have seen neither version and are wondering which to watch: go find Someday or One Day, because it’s an overall superior and more satisfying execution of the same story.

The Vibe

Let’s start here because it’s the most obvious and immediately striking thing as someone who has seen both versions. SOOD has a bit of a rough and unpolished feel, which makes it feel more grounded in reality (important when you are getting into fantasy elements like time travel but you still want the characters to feel like real people). We open our story in 1998 in a record shop with a young girl playing Last Dance by Wu Bai and China Blue, a 1996 mando pop rock ballad, and thus setting the tone—this will be a somewhat raw and bittersweet story about grief and hurt and longing that will invite us to wallow in our feelings. And that melancholic vibe stays throughout the drama, even in the explicitly happy scenes, because you are always aware that the joy you are seeing has already been lost.

By contrast, ATCY feels… emotionally flat. Don’t get me wrong, it is a very faithful adaptation. The early episodes are practically a shot for shot remake of the original drama. But it’s too polished, too shiny. The filmmaking is bog standard kdrama fare; everything is soft focus and warmly lit and too beautiful and consequently nothing feels real. It feels right in line with the standard aesthetics of recent mainstream Korean dramas, and that choice undermines the emotional weight and grit of this story.

A great example of this can be seen in the way the two dramas handle the iconic scene where our female lead runs in the rain, looking back over her shoulder to smile in delight at the male lead before continuing on her way. This is a moment of realization for him about his feelings for her—one he will later immortalize in a painting that becomes part of the mystery of the past she is trying to unravel. In Someday or One Day, this scene takes place on a regular street, in the utterly mundane surroundings of their everyday lives as they walk home, and she runs down the middle of the road as puddles gather in the uneven pavement; in A Time Called Love, they are in a picturesque park for this scene, surrounded by green and encased within a grove of giant trees, and she runs right down the middle of a tree lane that looks like it came straight out of a fairytale. One story is very much about a love grounded in a reality we can recognize; the other is pure fantasy romance.

The Music

I already mentioned the song that anchors the Taiwanese drama above. Last Dance is hugely important to the story, both thematically and as a plot device, and in its ability to set the mood and tone of the drama.

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The Korean remake similarly uses a real 1996 ballad as its main song and time travel mechanism: With My Tears by Seo Ji Won. And, uh, the vibe is a bit different.

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Discerning listeners might recognize this as one of the many classic love ballads performed by our favorite doctors by day, rock stars by night over on Hospital Playlist. It’s a perfectly fine song. But it sets quite a different tone for our story, doesn’t it? It also is meant to be a song that a teenage boy is hankering to listen to on cassette, and listen, I wasn’t living in Korea in 1996. I have no idea how culturally accurate that may be. I’m sure there were in fact baby Lee Ik Juns running around trying to get their hands on this cheesy love song. But the edgier sound of Last Dance definitely sounds more in line with something the teenage male lead would listen to and what the music is meant to convey. And frankly, since we hear this song about 30 times in the drama, it matters that Last Dance is just an objectively better song.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg, because beyond the classic song each version chose to use as its centerpiece, there is also a stark difference in the quality and tone of each drama’s OSTs. Here is a compilation of the Someday or One Day tracks, including the utterly gorgeous main theme by Shi Shi. The music is hugely important in the Taiwanese drama and is used to set the mood as well as emphasize its themes, and the tracks feel specific to this story.

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And here is a compilation of A Time Called You OSTs.

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If you’re familiar with kdrama OSTs, you will recognize most of the artists on here, as well as some new covers of old songs. And again, the vibes are quite different. Whereas SOOD was very intentional and specific in its music choices, ATCY just sounds like every other kdrama. There is nothing on this tracklist that stands out or evokes the kind of feeling that the SOOD tracks do.

The Main Couple

The name and timeline situation in this show makes this section unnecessarily difficult, so let me just make a little reference sheet here:

Someday or One Day

Alice Ke plays Yu Xuan (2019) and Yun Ru (1998)

Greg Hsu plays Quan Sheng (2019) and Zi Wei (1998)

A Time Called You

Jeon Yeo Been plays Jun Hee (2023) and Min Yu (1998)

Ahn Hyo Seop plays Yeun Jun (2023) and Si Heon (1998)

All of the actors here are seasoned and very good at their jobs, so I am not casting shade on any of them—they are executing their performances based on writing and directorial choices. But I cannot deny that the Taiwanese version of these characters are more compelling all around. In SOOD, the main characters have a real spark; despite the melancholic undertone of the story, there are moments of genuine joy and when they connect with each other, you feel why this bond is strong enough for them to find each other through time and despite all the trauma they endure. In ATCY, however, the characterizations are muted.

This is most evident in the difference between Quan Sheng/Zi Wei and Yeon Jun/Si Heon. Greg Hsu plays Zi Wei as magnetic, playful, mischievous, utterly lovable, and very intense about his feelings for his lady. He has a real joie de vivre about him that clearly brightens up Yu Xuan’s life considerably, and his devotion to her is not just shown, but deeply felt. Experiencing their memories, you understand immediately why Yu Xuan can’t move on from his death; he was the joyful, relaxed counterpoint to her more ambitious and serious personality. Si Heon, though? He is a nice dude and a generous partner and he is very good looking. But he doesn’t have the playfulness or the intensity that his Taiwanese counterpart does. His personality is just more moderate all around. One great example of this: upon discovering that he has traveled forward into the body of the person that would become Yu Xuan/Jun Hee’s boyfriend, Zi Wei (in Quan Sheng’s body now, are you still with me?) actively decides to find her, love her, and try to solve this time loop quagmire they are in; Si Heon (in Yeon Jun’s body) waits for a moment of fate to give him a sign, and only makes the decision to pursue Jun Hee after running into her by coincidence.

Similarly, Jun Hee is not quite as spunky and sassy as Yu Xuan and Min Yu is not as dark and awkward as Yun Ru; when Jun Hee travels to the past and takes up residence in Min Yu’s body, the differences between the two characters she is playing are not as evident. In SOOD, I could tell at a glance who is in Yun Ru’s body; in ATCY I need more context to be sure. Where Yun Ru had more of an edge, Min Yu simply reads very shy. It’s not as compelling. One scene that really stands out as an example of this: when Yun Ru is pretending to be Yu Xuan in 1998 and looks in the mirror to practice smiling, it looks downright creepy and sinister; when Min Yu is masquerading as Jun Hee and looks at herself in the mirror, she just looks awed and happy, if a bit awkward. It’s subtle, but it changes the way you feel about the characters.

The difference in Jun Hee and Yeon Jun’s characterization also affects the couple chemistry, which is just not nearly as strong in ATCY. The characters are more muted and thus the expected sparks are more like smoldering embers. The relationship feels cozy and warm and nurturing, but it doesn’t feel vital. It doesn’t feel like the kind of relationship you would fight through time or break the rules of the universe to return to. I recall gasping or crying or laughing out loud throughout SOOD because I was constantly taken aback by Greg Hsu’s arresting presence and the chemistry he and Alice Ke generated was just emotionally riveting. When Yu Xuan told Zi Wei (as Quan Sheng) that they were officially together, that man literally jumped for joy and shouted out his love for her; Si Heon (as Yeon Jun) reacts to the same moment with a quiet smile and a hug. When Zi Wei saw Yu Xuan in Yun Ru’s body again in the finale, he knew instantly that it was her and the smile overtook his face as he reached for her; Si Heon initially called Min Ju’s name before getting closer and taking several beats to realize it was Jun Hee (ruining this iconic moment is perhaps this remake’s greatest sin against romance, my god).

Everything between the couple in SOOD was just more, both in happiness and in despair. I liked Jun Hee and Si Heon, and Ahn Hyo Seop and Jeon Yeo Been are very competent actors whose performances I have loved in other dramas, but they didn’t achieve that level of chemistry here, the writing and directing choices worked against them, and I didn’t feel that same desperation for them to figure this out that I did with Yu Xuan and Zi Wei.

The Story

The Korean version is a very faithful adaptation overall (I haven’t mentioned Jun Jie and In Gyuk because his character and story is more consistent across the two shows), but does make some small tweaks to the story, some of which seem to be out of necessity due to a shorter run time (one episode and a couple hours total less than the Taiwanese original) and some just… because? The shorter amount of story time does lead to them having to cut corners on some aspects of the mythology and time travel lore, making it all a bit less clear for folks who don’t already understand what’s going on, and they put in a few nods to typical kdrama tropes like amusement park dates and hand of fate stuff that we really didn’t need—they are already trapped in a time loop together, we get it!

ATCY also messed with the timelines and ages for reasons I don’t really understand and that don’t really track. In SOOD, Zi Wei traveled forward from 2002 to Quan Sheng’s body in 2010, met Yu Xuan, and then died in 2018. In ATCY, Si Heon traveled forward from 2002 only to 2007 and did not die until 2022—but the relationship dynamics are all the same. It made sense for a young couple who had been together about 7 years and who were in their mid-20s to be having the kind of relationship problems they did—fighting about prioritizing careers and time abroad and whether it was time to get married. But a couple who has been together nearly 15 years? Who are in their mid-30s? They would have already been married probably and had a couple kids to boot. The choice to change the timeline like this had me scratching my head and accomplished nothing for the story.

But neither of those things are the change to the story that is weighing on me most. That occurs in a very small and brief backstory for the real Yeon Jun, where the drama introduces an original character who has no counterpart in SOOD: Tae Ha.

In SOOD, the real Quan Sheng is a closeted gay teenager who meets a tragic end: he confesses to his crush, gets brutally rejected, then gets bullied when the crush tells others about his sexuality, and ultimately decides to walk into the sea in an attempt to end his life, a choice that leaves his body in a coma until Zi Wei’s consciousness takes it over. In ATCY, this backstory changes and Rowoon is brought in for a brief but impactful cameo as Tae Ha, Yeon Jun’s cram school friend. We see that the two have mutual feelings for each other but are both struggling to confess. One day as they are driving together, they finally explicitly acknowledge their feelings, holding hands and smiling at one another—and then immediately get hit by a Truck of Doom (easily one of the most tired kdrama tropes), Tae Ha dying on impact and Yeon Jun ending up in a coma with Si Heon’s consciousness eventually taking over his body like in the original story.

Now on first glance, you might be inclined to give the show some credit for including a new gay character and giving the original Yeon Jun a happier experience with his crush. Explicit gay representation? In a mainstream kdrama? Still very rare and a big deal if done right. But if you think for a moment longer you’ll realize we can’t give the show credit for this, because this is a textbook execution of the Bury Your Gays trope and the narrative punishment that befalls gay characters who act on their attraction. Essentially, what the Korean remake did here was reveal these two characters are gay, killed them both immediately after they decided to pursue a relationship with each other, and then had the het male lead character take over the body of this gay man and use it to enter into a relationship with a woman. Some aspects of this plot were present in the original tale, but this choice to add an additional gay character only to kill him and tie it to their moment of acknowledging their mutual attraction? Made it significantly worse. It was badly done and I will not applaud the drama for representation when they did it in such a cruel way.

The Ending

SOOD ends on a hopeful but somewhat ambiguous note, with Yu Xuan in 2020 finding a way to go back and save Yun Ru (and Jun Jie by extension) and then breaking the time loop, sacrificing her relationship with Zi Wei in the process even as it breaks her heart (because the only way for them to meet and fall in love in 2010 was to stay in the loop). She sacrifices their romance, and all their memories together, because it’s the right thing to do—she inadvertently destroyed Yun Ru’s life with her time traveling, and she couldn’t live with that knowing there was a way to fix it. We are left with a broken time loop, original teen Zi Wei meeting child Yu Xuan again in 1998, and the hope that they will find a way to make their fates align again and be together without time travel complications. It’s just the right bittersweet touch to end the story on; their previous relationship was lost and their sacrifice was real, but there is hope for another version of a happy life together, someday.

By contrast, ATCY goes for a more explicit happy ending: Jun Hee makes the same choice to go back and save Min Ju, and to break the time loop and sacrifice her relationship with Si Heon, but in ATCY we then jump forward to 2011 to a happy epilogue to see Si Heon and Jun Hee meet as adults. And look, I love a happy ending! But what I said above about the sacrifice Yu Xuan and Zi Wei made in SOOD really resonating because of its bittersweet ending? That’s absent here, because ATCY decided they needed to put a bow on it and reassure us they would get back together. ATCY was just never willing to let us stay in the grief or commit to the darker and sadder aspects of this story, and as a result, the whole thing loses some of its impact.

#someday or one day #a time called you #tw drama #kdrama #long post #why yes i did write a 3k word post for the ten people on this website who care about both these dramas #shan shouts into the void

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toomanythoughts4myhead · 5 months

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Where my sorrows went to die

Summary: The prologue to my story: Ballads never end happily and neither do we.(based on my prompt).What if Coriolanus hadn’t managed to kill his lover back in district 12? What if the face haunting his life for the past three years comes back in flesh and bone? Will things be different this time or will he repeat the same mistakes? Giving you the gist of what Coriolanus has been up to since his return in the Capitol and how the story starts.

Warnings: Coriolanus Snow (the walking red flag), mentions of death, mentions of grief and pain, the usual egomaniacal inner monologue Corio has (tell me if I missed anything)

Pairings: young!Coriolaus Snow x reader

A/N: Gave this man too much backstory out of nowhere, next chapters will have more action I swear. I just HAD to explain some of what was running through my head as basis of the plot. Hope you enjoy!

[Masterlis] [Next chapter ->]

Word count: 2.8K (around)

The oak trees in the fireplace were burning up, turning black and runny. The pleasant barely heard cracking from burning bark was long gone. The fire was dying, its life extinguished.

It felt familiar.

Coriolanus barely noticed the change in light or temperature, too engrossed in the paperwork that came along with his new working position. It wasn’t the boring cushiony job that he had envisioned back in his academy days, but it was better. The scribbling of pen on paper came to a halt, as the smell of burning wood turned to coals. Coriolanus didn’t much favor the smell of coals, or the cinder they left behind everywhere.

With an almost frustrated squelch of the expensive chair, he had for his study desk, he stood up and called for someone to clean up the fireplace.

He had won his way back to the Capitol, back to wealth and power, back to his true highest form. He didn’t need to breath in the cinder in the air anymore.

He didn’t need to return back to her.

In his upright position he opens one of the windows of his study, the one that overlooks the Capitols center. The cool December air hits him just right, the smell of snow heavy in early morning. The freshness clears his mind and sooths his newfound tenseness which he makes sure to correct as an avox scurries into the room. He doesn’t have to tolerate their filth anymore.

A lot of things have happened in the past 3 years. After his return from duty in district 12, he went on to university and finished his studying under Dr Gaul’s keen eye. Most of his time had truly been spend hauled up in her laboratories, discussing and going over ideas for the games before he was officially made into a part of the game makers. Youngest of them all he had acted on the same manners and sweet-talking he had used for his teachers in the Academy. Old people’s need for respect and admiration made them easy to flatter, it was almost funny.

Back in the days where he had to fear of the upcoming day, he had worked with whatever limited resources he had, running himself dry to hide his families fall from prosperity. Now that he had the Plinths grief-stricken minds, open hearts and fat wallets he could allow his mind to focus solely on whatever web he was spinning this time around. It felt good not to worry for money. Even if it was tarnished by the fact, he had resorted to taking it from districts. But who better take the money of people not belonging in this world than the future president of Panem? It was in everyone’s best interest.

For his 20th birthday the Plinths had bought him his own penthouse. He remembers it well, it wasn’t exactly a surprise, or a well-hidden one at that. Ma Plinth had been looking at him all teary eyed and smitten at the annual Friday dinner he had to sit through, blabbering on and on how he was becoming a fine young man and needed to settle in his own nest, to spread his wings and fly to a new horizon. What was with district people and their birds?

Granma ‘am always looked disdained at best by Mrs. Plinths company, but that night in particular seemed truly to be a new high. Seeing Mrs. Plinth rave about her Corio as if she had been the one who raised him must have rubbed her the wrong way, judging by the poisonous glances. She would never truly be able to stomach knowing that their way of life was supported by lucky district bumpkins, but at her old age she couldn’t complain too much. Her hair was thinning and her eyes were losing their focus, not to mention her aching knees. Thankfully with some of Plinth’s money the elevator was fixed and she could actually go out, rather than sing the hymn all day and water her roses. She was getting older, it always stuck out to Coriolanus, and he always almost immediately focus on the smiling figure of Tigris next to her.

She was able to quit her dead-end job as a seamstress, or more like the cleaner of the cloth shop. She could take life easier, even if her good heart and hardworking soul didn’t let her indulge too much in the luxuries their new life brought along. She never wanted to bother the Plinths, she didn’t like that they were leeching off of them, despite knowing it’s the best thing to do.

She had mentioned it to Coriolanus once, over a glass of some fancy alcohol Strabo Plinth had brought over after the main dinner had ended. The Plinths had returned to the apartment above them and grandma ‘am had retired to her room. With a creased brow and wine-stained lips she had mentioned it didn’t feel right to suck so much money out of the grieving minds of the Plinth’s, that it just didn’t sit right with her to see the poor family crumble so much so that they would turn Coriolanus into their pseudo son and project all their ruined dreams on him. Coriolanus had thrown her a glance over the rim of his glass, expression plane and unbothered, even if faint disdain could be read in his eyes. Not feeling like going in detail over the matter he had simply asked what should they do instead. They continued to drink in silence into the late hours of the night.

Despite this she now worked in a respectable position at Strabo’s Ammunition enterprise. She made a decent paycheck, way better than the scraps she was offered before. The weight of the family’s survival had been lifted off of her frail, still too young shoulders and it seemed that her youth had returned. Coriolanus always knew that their age gap was small, but he also knew how much Tigris had sacrificed: her education, wellbeing, personal life all to provide for him and Granma ‘am. Now her face shone with delight and beauty, lighting every room she entered. She has formed friendships at work, most of which Coriolanus approved, she was even seeing some girl, it made her happy. Coriolanus was glad to see her live the life she was always meant to have, despite everything. She was always the most deserving one, the kindest, the most compassionate, untainted by the same hate that seemed to be rooted in the family line. The one he seemed to be burdened to carry. Some days he envied her, most days he pitied her.

The gifted penthouse was luxurious and spacious, no surprises there. Most of the walls were bare except for a recent portrait the Snows had gotten as a gift from Ma Plinth, actually almost everything was bare, Coriolanus supposed that it was part of the “wing spreading” process for him to design his living space. Sleeping on a mattress on the floor for a few days until his furniture came, brought back some memories certainty, but in the end, he was able to decorate as he pleased rather than deal with the sentimental cluttered nonsense he had witnessed on many occasions at the Plinths. It screamed of people who weren’t used to having money and that’s the last thing Coriolanus needed.

Now he had it all, lavish furniture, a private study, a grand bedroom, personal avoxes to take care of it for him. All colours, items on the walls, tables, shelfs and their clearly expensive prices, it all created the image of the person Coriolanus wanted to be perceived as, all people should know of him. It made him fit in enough with the rich snobs, but shine apart from everyone else with his own personal taste. He would take pride in inviting possible work partners and sponsors for the games over.

Between balancing his position as a game maker, his shares in the Plinth business, he would no doubt inherit in a few years, and his personal relations with family and possible allies, he was spread thin in the best way possible. He was busy building his empire, his legacy, he knew he would achieve what he wanted in the end.

Not because he was blatantly arrogant, not only at least, not because he was charismatic and silver-tongued, not because of how the population of Panem seemed to swoon for the charm and looks he presented himself with. It was all because there wasn’t a price, he wasn’t willing to pay to achieve what he desired. That was the truest form of power, to have the control over your own attachments, the things that rendered everything and anything important. When you have none of that, what will stop you?

He has learned his lesson, he had felt the sting of powerlessness because of his stupidly naive love. Coriolanus Snow will never love again, he would be the one sinking his poison and manipulating this time, pulling the strings of other people’s attachment, but he would never hand over the reins of his heart again.

The angular clean shapes created by the Capitols buildings were smudged by the fast pace of his personal car and the falling snow. Dr Gaul had managed to haul him out of his warm home and call on him to personally visit her.

Coriolanus must admit that he did not miss this side of his new obligations. As he had begun to climb ranks in the social rings Dr Gaul had also stopped breathing down his neck as much, seemingly satisfied by his choices. Back at University when he was basically her apprentice he would have to see and act on her whims every single day. He respects her and her realistic views on humanity and society, but her unpredictability has always made him uncomfortable. He could feel safe knowing he was needed in her future plans but he could never be fully sure what they are exactly. Her mind seemed far too outlandish and out of the box, possibly mad even, for him to decipher and it always put him on edge when he got a call out of the blue.

The car rolls to a stop and his expensive boots leave marks in the snow as he climbs the stairs to the Citadel. The building had always been rather extraordinary and over the top in the way the Capitol seemed to love, so it had faced no renovations or changes in the past years. The same couldn’t be said for most structures in the Capitol. It seems that people have grown tired of seeing all the damage done by the war on the streets and buildings. Especially as the success of the past few hunger games had got the population of the Capitol more hyped, the nationalism seems to have grown.

Most simply enjoyed the games as a really bloody reality TV show at this point, but the older people who still felt the burning hatred for the districts were left satisfied and made big donations, satisfied by the cruel blood baths. Donations were made for rebuilding too, people wanted to drive home how truly better the Capitol was, how its reign would last forever. That was a sentiment Coriolanus was very satisfied to contribute to, he wanted to feel everyday how much better he was than those animals.

The acidic warm air of the labs underground makes him feel a bit better, winters seem to have grown harsher in the past years.

Good.

The staff directly assisting Dr Gaul hadn’t changed much, a few new unimportant faces but most knew him well enough not to even ask what business he had there. He made his way down the narrowing corridors, unbothered by all the abominations that were crying or wailing in their cages. He had seen them too many times to pity them and had watched them rip to shreds a few too many tributes in the newer editions of the games to feel remorse.

He opened the white heavy door to Doctor Gaul’s personal labs and searched for the woman with his gaze. She was waiting for him in her preferred red robes, purposefully stained, it always gave her a sinister aura, especially when she was wearing that unpredictable smile to match. Nothing friendly or even sadistically happy, it was all teeth and that unpredictable glint in her eyes.

She always looked at people like they were her little test subjects, thrilled to find out if they will die or live another day at her hands.

“Snow is falling heavily on Panem this winter, it seems to be overtaking the city by a storm. I am wishing you the same fate Mr. Snow.”

Coriolanus really hadn’t missed her little word plays and he had missed even less having to rake his brain for possible answers.

“Dr Gaul you requested to see me for something important, as I understand?” – Coriolanus asks calmly, making sure his impatience to return back home wasn’t too obvious, as he fiddled with the petals of the white rose tucked in his suit pocket.

“Young Mr. Snow you have been doing well, it seems you are putting what you learned back from District 12 to good use. You have realized the way people’s puny brains work and how attachment controls them, your ideas based on this thesis have helped raise the Hunger games to the civilian’s interest. For that I applaud you.”

The click clacking of her heels sounded oddly hollow compared to the deafening silence created in the laboratory.

Where was she going with this?

“But I often wonder if you yourself are able to withstand those powerful emotions within yourself. If you truly have been cured of it as you claim to have been.”

“Doctor Gaul I don’t understand-”

“Then perhaps we should test it to be sure. Follow me, Mr. Snow”

And with that she was walking away and deeper into the secluded laboratories down the hall. Coriolanus had no other choice but to follow her, even as his mind was running lightyears ahead of him.

What did this crazy woman intend to do? Flashes of Clementina’s fate flash before his eyes from all those years back and he knows that Dr Gaul would do whatever she pleases and stop at nothing. If she meant to test his attachment then that would mean she would harm Tigris? Granma’ am?

Flashes of strung up corpses accompanied by screams of birds fly through his mind and almost dull his vision. Thankfully he doesn’t walk head first into the wall at a specific sharp turn. He stands up straighter and slows his step, he is Coriolanus Snow, he is in control.

As he follows the menacing figure of Dr Gaul around a seemingly endless corridor of small rooms, that had a striking resemblance to a medical wing, they came to a gradual stop in front of room 278. No words were exchanged as they wordlessly stepped inside. He realized with a baited breath and fastening heartbeat, that his assumption about the medical wing had been correct. The room consisted of white walls and a simple medical bead that lay in the middle of the floor, currently hidden by drapes. The clinical acidic smell and lack of corpses at first glance made his shoulder untense under his red vest, just a little.

Dr Gaul walked over with the same unshakable calmness she always carried and went to stand next to the bed, just inches from the curtains, signaling for Coriolanus to come and open them. She observed him unblinkingly, the spark of interest never wavering.

If something gained such a strong response from doctor Gaul, Coriolanus was ready to sign his loved ones’ obituaries.

His heart was beating out of his chest and he hoped his breathing hadn’t intensified, as his hand took a hold of the rough material. He knew that he wasn’t visually showing anything, years of play pretend and weaving lies had made him an amazing subconscious actor, but he also knew that nothing escaped Dr Gaul’s gaze.

He pulled back the curtains with a sharp tug and for a few moments he didn’t know how to respond.

He felt almost naïve relief as he witnessed sprawled out body, so foreign from his family’s. And then it all came back cascading onto him as his mind cleared and he looked past the stress induced haze.

The image he had been seeing every night, the ghost haunting everything beautiful, the job he never finished properly.

It was you.

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abbyonmars · 5 months

Text

can't catch me now. | ellie williams - wlw ♥

".. i'm just going to go dig up some katniss. there's a good patch, down by the lake." "i thought it was too early for that."

.・゜゜・inspired by the ballad of songbirds and snakes. thankyou suzanne collins for the wonderful franchise of thg :')

narrative: second person. sfw: angst/a little fluff idk wc: 4.5k

"well, the world changes awful fast."

warnings: signs of manipulation(?). canon plot to tlou2 (somewhat), violence + death!!! blood + torture. emetophobia warning (no one throws up, i just mention a lot of feeling nauseous). also progressively shitty to even shittier writing LOOL

"but.. it's still raining." "well - i'm not made 'outta sugar."

— in which expressing your devout love and loyalty for ellie williams had come at the cost of your own sanity.

°:. *₊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊

it had been about a day since you and ellie had arrived in seattle. you were situated behind her on a trotting mare as you both were headed towards the hospital, the one past the forest by which you both had been focused on for at least a couple of hours now. it had been almost completely silent within the duration of the trip, interrupted by the occasional question or comment from time to time.

in the past, you two had been attached at the hip — you had spent every living moment with each other, having shared fond and delicate memories since the day she stepped a foot into jackson.

you had been one of the first to greet her into her first week. despite her initially unsociable attitude, you tried your best to make her feel welcomed because, bless your heart, you thought you sensed something good behind those guarded green eyes of hers.

each leaf strung on every tree branch beside you collectively shook with rash force, disturbed with each whistle of wind as it weaved itself through the compact forest. the breeze had continuously brushed against you, casting cold shivers along your skin causing your body to shudder behind the girl in front.

"ellie?"

".. hm?"

in this moment, your breath hitched. something about it made you feel uneasy, nauseous, perhaps in craving for the sweet comfort of jackson's warmth. you missed its atmosphere and the protection of its great walls and people. you really missed your friends - reminiscing on the sweet times you had joked and laughed and carelessly partied with them had started to make you feel sick to your stomach with each recollection.

god, you were so naive. if only you had really cherished those moments. had you never taken them for granted, maybe you never would've left. had you never made the decision to challenge your odds, it wouldn't hurt to let past you see exactly where you were now. there was nothing you wanted more but to be back home. if only time could reverse to moments before the present.

.. reverse to the times before that golf club had ever struck joel's head.

but you never said anything like that. spoke your real feelings and dissimilar logic aloud.

".. nothing."

the brunette huffed. with a few clicks of her tongue and a few gentle tugs on the mare's lead, the speed of which you both were moving came to a gradual stop.

"you know," she said, turning her head over her shoulder to you, "i hate when you do that."

you shrugged. admittedly, you weren't all that sure why you did do that. you were quiet for a moment though, silently condemning yourself for even choosing to speak in the first place. maybe all you needed was to get something off your chest. but was it the right time? what would she even say?

"'m sorry," you mumbled, half-apologetically - you knew her head wasn't in the right space. that her love, and her grief was so strong, all she had the space to think about was settling the twisted burdens that wouldn't stop pricking and poking at her like a thousand rose thorn casted devils on her shoulder. until she was able to strip them all away through vengeance.. at least that's what it seemed to be.

residing by you, however, was a pit of resentment. a very deep one, for that matter. it took you so long to even acknowledge it was there, because even through all the pain your delicate hands had endured and inflicted, it never took you much thought to keep going for the girl you had always given your all to.

"i just.. can't stand the silence, i guess. sorry."

ellie let out a scoff-sounding chuckle and shook her head at you. it wasn't certain whether that was a gesture of disproval or a way of simple teasing, but either way, you did catch a subtle hint of a force tugging upward on the corner of her lips.

"oh. s'okay.. babe," she answered. before she turned back around, one hand let go of the reigns to awkwardly pat one of the hands you had resting on her waist for security. "we okay to keep going? or do you have to stop?"

do you have to?

when she said it, it almost sounded rhetorical. as if she didn't actually expect an answer from you other than the one she wanted.

"uhm.. we have been riding for a while, ellie. i'm sure the horse needs a rest." you murmured reluctantly, at once noticing the way her eyes finally darted away at your response. as she motioned the horse forward, you let out an uneasy chuckle, practically hear the cogs in her brain sputtering with thought. her silence became slightly troubling even though it didn't take her that long to come up with an answer.

she inhaled slowly. at first her head tilted upwards towards a nod, right before it lowered and shifted into a shaking motion similar to what she had done to you a few seconds ago.

"we're almost there, y/n. just ten more minutes, okay?"

your eyebrows furrowed and your arms around her had tensed slightly. what, she couldn't sit still for a second?

"but..." you swallowed. in the turn by which you spoke next, your voice grew quieter, sort of similar to the pathetic creaking sound of a slowly opening door. "i'm cold. hungry, also."

you noticed her jaw shifting as she grit her teeth together; you knew she tried to keep her patience with you, but that patience seemed to thin by each day you spent alongside her.

"there are protein bars in the small pocket," she muttered, referring to the space in her bag on her back. her tone was unwavering, yet slightly apprehensive or on edge. "can't you wait this out?"

the tension between you two was impalpable, and you couldn't help but feel a little impatient yourself. the desperation in her voice that you knew she was trying with effort to bury deep and away from your ears was so obvious and it was almost frustrating, because what was so different about the current circumstance that made her feel like she couldn't share what was on her mind with you, like she had already done before?

there was a slight pause before you leaned your body forward in attempt to look at her. from the side of her face, her eyes were vacantly focused ahead as she guided your steed, but there was nothing more.

"ten minutes won't hurt," you pressed. "c'mon, please? let's check out one of the buildings, and we can talk or something."

this earned a silence from the brunette. with you being sat behind her, you weren't fully sure what she made of your suggestion, given the limited view of her face. she sighed again, giving the heavy heave of her torso before she answered.

"talk? you think we have the time for that?" she muttered once again, her words growing harder. harder in tone, harder to hear. her words flowed much too quickly, like she was holding them in and just happened to let them go. "nora could be leaving as we speak, and you want to talk? what is so important, y/n. what even is there to talk about? did you follow me to help, or did you come here to be a burden?"

ouch. with your own inflicted silence, you leaned back and withdrew from her. your hands on her waist twitched with their own demands to pull back too as your touch grew lighter and more hesitant.

whatever sparkle you could remember from whence you looked into her eyes heretofore had died, and an empty shell of whoever she had become was left behind. there was no room left for you anymore. what you were starting to realise was that her hollow mind would always be occupied. occupied by everything, anything but you.

".. shit." she whispered. her head tilted downward as she cursed, and the horse started to slow. she did realise her mistake, but was evidently unsure of how to navigate around it. around you. "i didn't.. mean that, y/n."

a week ago, this time around, who's to say she would've reacted the same? it was almost amusing, how insincere this whole thing felt. she could, and has apologised before in endless fashion, but you knew her fallacies would always bounce back to follow her. even after the very few words of this moment and after the regretful sounding apologies, her past actions and the few unveiled emotion she had shared became very telling of her subtle duplicity.

you suddenly felt exhausted. sighing quietly you nodded, regardless of the fact that she couldn't see you, along with the hurt that glossed over your eyes.

"mhm," you hummed, attempting to hide the falter in your voice and the sudden apathy expressed. "s'fine. we'll keep going."

"no." she mumbled. pulling the mare over to a nearby sign, you watched with slight incredulity as she swung her leg over its body to jump off, meeting the ground with an aspirated grunt of effort. she looked up at you and held out her hand for you to help yourself off.

"nora can wait," she added after a pause. you noticed a slight crease in her eyebrows that wore into her face as she spoke, and how often she blinked at you. "let's scout out that clinic. we're running out of supplies anyway."

feeling slightly guilt ridden and promptly feeling indifferent about leaving your steed, you stared at the offer that was her hand before you took it, the nipping temperature of her calloused palm pressing sharply against the gentle warmth of your own.

coming off of the horse with a similar sounding grunt, you moved your head to look up at her. you noticed the darkening bags of fatigue abrading heavily at her eyes, and the dullness of labour worn on her face. you were quite surprised at how easily she let up and the way her mind changed in an instant.

"c'mon." ellie mumbled, noticing the abrupt silence from you. she squeezed your hand, trying for at least a drop of alleviation.

with her free hand she tied the leash of the horse to the sign before turning to you again, attempting to offer a smile as she looked down at you.

she then took you by the hand into the clinic. like most buildings, it was considerably worn down; faintly printed advertisements were weakly plastered over the walls, some having been teared down by time and its circumstances. shelves were scattered, broken, and fractured to pieces — if you weren't careful, poor manoeuvring would land at least a couple of splinters into your skin.

looking downward, you stepped carefully around the broken remains of glass and the sort, simultaneously looking for items to take along with you. whatever you were stepping over crunched under the soles of the boots of both yours and ellie's, filling the brief silence that had overcome the air in the meantime.

she still had you with her by the hand. herd hand had warmed a little since being wrapped around yours, and she gave the occasional squeeze — however rough her skin was from the many years of combat, the simple gesture had always been able to twist your heart and make you swoon, no matter the picture of your relationship. she had you wrapped around her finger in an almost suffocating grip.

you watched the back of her head. the way it would snap towards the direction of any given sound. the way her short hair would move with the direction of her head as she moved it, and each detail of the half-up styling she did that morning.

"i hope dina and jesse are okay." you mumbled, more so to yourself.

"me too," ellie answered, keeping her eyes ahead as she squeezed your hand again. "i'm sure they're fine. jesse'll be good at holding down the fort, especially since.. you know."

part of your somber-ness was partly influenced by your worry — since dina revealed her pregnancy, it was a lot of what you could really think about at this point, aside from your nauseating homesickness. you had left them both at the theatre in pursuit of nora, leaving jesse in care of dina's quickly weakening state.

you looked up at her. you and jesse had both already suggested going back to jackson for dina (and the baby)'s sake, but you couldn't leave tommy out here alone. you all knew the direction he was headed in, but it was only a matter of time before he would meet his near demise.

"yeah, but, how long until he can't?" as you spoke, your eyes continued to observe the clinic, drifting along its walls and dismantled furniture. "anything could've happened by now, ellie. i'm a little worried."

she stopped and turned around to face you, her eyes disconcertedly moving around the room one more time as a precaution before they settled onto yours.

"look," she said, taking a gentle step closer to you, "you don't need to worry about them. jesse's strong, and dina knows how to defend herself. have a little faith, huh?"

she chuckled softly. it had been a while since you heard her laugh, yet you could find it in yourself to laugh back. it's like she couldn't see the severity of the situation — sure, dina was a undoubtedly a strong fighter, but how long could you keep up your fight when you literally have a human growing inside of you, taking up half your strength?

your eyes casted downward. you could feel your heart start to race in your chest from slight alarm. "this isn't a joke. what if jesse's hurt, or.. dead, or something. dina would be all alone. are you not worried too?"

"hey. of course i'm worried," she took her free hand to under your chin, lifting it up with the side of her index finger and the tip of her thumb. "but i'm worried about us too.. about you. they're okay, y/n, they can handle their own."

for the moment you were now looking back into her eyes, you felt a little reassured. maybe you did need to have a little more faith in them — after all, they'd been able to keep themselves alive for this long. tommy could even be back to accompany them.

but no matter what, you knew you'd continue to entertain your stress until you got back. not only that, but something about the look she gave you felt slightly fabricated, hinting at a deeper meaning or purpose you just couldn't quite put a finger on.

"fine," you sighed. "i just wanna get out of here."

her eyebrows then creased and her slightly cracked lips were tugging into a frown. she paused for a moment as if to contemplate what you said, letting her hand slip from your face.

"sure," she mumbled, taking her hand to rub at the back of her neck. a nervous habit that she's always been inclined to practice. "let's head out then, hmm?"

with that, you both continued your search of the clinic. a few minutes passed and she had somehow managed to find a small, silver trinket of a bear necklace pendant, one that she had sheepishly approached you with.

"hey," she halfway whispered, her tone at a playfully quiet shout to get your attention.

"huh?" you mumbled, only just breaking out of your concentration that was previously focused on the drawer you were scavenging for bandages. you lacked to pay much mind as you turned around to face her, now a little taken aback by her sudden jesting-ish act.

she had her hands behind her back, partly grinning at you.

"pick one."

your eyebrows furrowed, and yet your lips twitched with slight amusement. ".. what?"

"my hands, silly. left or right?"

"uhh.. left?"

"good job!" she chuckled, bringing her left hand in front of her, her fingers still wrapped into a lightly held fist. it was actually in her right, but she swapped it behind her back before she revealed her surprise. she shook it mildly, seemingly charmed by the confusion forming on your face. "you won!"

you narrowed your eyes at her. with the slight shake and tilt of your head, you chuckled back at her, asking dubiously what she was getting at.

she had told you to open up your hand and carefully dropped it into the middle of your palm, gifting it from her to you. you were both blushing, even almost giggling as if you were both children again in a playground.

you pocketed the bear, hearing the pendant clink against the other various metallic items you had already stuffed into your jeans.

"you know, you kind of remind me of a bear," she snorted, lifting her hand to habitually rub her fingers against her earlobe.

"what?" your nose scrunched and she chuckled again, enjoying expression she planted on your face.

"you're cute and cuddly." she winked, watching as your face only turned more at her poor joke. her smile grew more once she received a light punch on her arm to which she pulled it to her and rubbed it, jokingly wincing with a sarcastic 'ouch' mouthed in a whisper from her lips.

"but you're also.. you know - you're brave," she murmured. her smile had subsequently faltered as she spoke to you, her tone the most gentle from whence you heard her speak days before. " - and protective. you're my shield, y/n, my confidence. i-i could take on all the hits in the world - as long as you're there with me."

you stuffed the bear back into your jean pocket after you had sat there observing its quirks from in between your finger and your thumb; the silver of the metal twinkled delicately under the taps of light from the windows, bringing out the colour from the faded pink of the artificial bow detailed on the ear of its head. it stared back at you as you watched it, trapped back into your thoughts again.

you were currently in the other room of the clinic, as ellie had left to check the other room a few minutes ago. she seemingly wanted to hide the cute flush on her face — the way she avoided your eyes with a surprisingly shy smile before she walked away was etched into your brain.

you were still smiling softly to yourself. you really appreciated the sweet gesture, even if it was a small one — it made you forget about the worries that was the homesickness and your friends for the moment, easing the ache in your chest and the wrinkles between your then furrowed brows.

but then you heard a thump. and then another one. and then an unfamiliar voice, and then a gunshot.

and suddenly that ache was back, striking hard and fast against your chest as you backed into the wall, sliding carefully against it. you edged towards the doorframe, slipping your revolver out from your pocket with a tight, slightly shaking grip.

"no no no, please...! i-i d-don't know who that is!"

another thump.

"p-please.." they were choking. their voice was broken up before you heard them spit, coughing something up onto the floor.

"look at me, fucker."

.. ellie?

you poked your head just past the frame, and your eyes settled on your girl. she had her back to you and him up against the wall on the floor, with one hand a bloodied bat and the other a pointed gun.

" - and don't you try to lie to me. i'll make you eat your bullshit, wolf."

she raised the bat to underneath his chin, forcing his head up to look at her. he coughed up more blood; the red splattered over the splintered wood, and it dribbled down his chin. he looked weak. his eyes were bloodshot and his tears were mixing in with the blood that oozed out of the slashes on his dislodged nose.

blood had also been seeping through the fabric of his pants. it exuded out into an escalating puddle of dark red on the floor, trickling closer towards the soles of ellie's shoes. you could hear his anxious whimpers, and you watched as he held both hands to his leg, dragging it across the floor as he kept up his attempts to back away from her. however, each time he tried, ellie would only step closer to him, menacingly staring daggers into his eyes.

"i-i'm not lying, i swear.. i'm not one of t-them, i only have my little girl.. she's - she's waiting for me - "

thump. except it was more than a thump. much more so, you swore his head was almost knocked right off his body.

"yes you are," ellie growled through her teeth. "tell me where nora is, or abby, or your little girl will have to stay waiting."

you blinked. of course, you had seen ellie take lives just as she's seen you take on your own. but this wasn't her. this wasn't the same girl who had you flushed and smitten just a few minutes ago, was it?

after a brief pause, she lowered her bat, letting it swing loosely at her side. you sighed in relief, and yet a moment too soon — she cocked her gun, raising it to aim between his glossy eyes.

"n-no.. no."

"fucking talk, idiot!" she barked, the threat rolling off from her tongue as easily as she waved the barrel at his face like it was nothing. she came closer and closer, her stance making her scrawny body seem bigger than that of this middle aged man.

it was as if you were frozen still. every cell in your body egged you on, desperately urging for you to move, to intervene. but you couldn't, like your shoes were glued to the floor and all you could do was stare and ignore the dizzy spell that cursed you to feel like the room was spinning and closing in on you.

she clicked her tongue. her head rolled to the side for a moment as she let out this sinistrous laugh and you saw her permanent snarl, lips turned with progressively darkening eyes.

"... ellie?"

and her head snapped towards you. you were stupid to assume the light in her eyes would return, but all you were met with was relentless rage, like hell was crackling from behind her eyes.

"hey, angel." she muttered, slowly averting her gaze back to the victim that lay almost limp just under her. "might wanna turn back there. this isn't something i want you here with me for."

"ellie," you repeated in a shallow breath, eyes glued to the blood and the man and oh god, the blood. "what are you.. doing.."

your voice seemed to quiver as you spoke, growing frail with the fear of actually finding out the answer to your own question. the words came out almost involuntarily, evident through your mouth agape and your eyes widening bit by bit at the sight.

"y/n," she replied, not even bothering to turn to face you. you noticed her knuckles, all bruised and trickling with blood that seeped through the tears and rips in her skin. "please."

"you - you - y-you look just like her," the man pointed a weak, shaking finger at you. "m-my girl, my daughter. please, i.. i need to see-"

another blow to his body, except to his chest this time. he groaned and coughed up more blood, spewing it out of his mouth as he wheezed a feminine name you couldn't quite catch.

"ellie, don't.." your voice broke. finally stepping into the open, you flinched as she harshly shoved the barrel into his forehead, tearing further skin.

"you don't believe this shithead, do you?" she snapped at you. "there's no girl, he's lying through his teeth."

"ellie."

"if i let him go he'll fuck off," she shoved the barrel once again into his face, trailing it down his nose, making him wince. "fuck off and rat me out to his friends. can't have that."

"p-please find her," he croaked staring directly at you and into your eyes, "t-tell her tha - that daddy loves her.. ple - please."

the moment seemed to blur together, and all you could remember was distinct choked pleas. you remembered wanting to throw up your battering heart, the way you felt like succumbing to a collapse and sinking, melting into the floor. it was all nauseating, each time she'd knock the gun into his pummelled head coincidentally in tune with your pulse.

you tried to pull her away, but that only seemed to make matters worse for the three of you. ellie held her arm out in defence, blocking you from her offence — you heard each cracking bone, felt each droplet of blood splattered onto your face alongside the impact from each relentless blow the man took by cause of ellie's pitiless hands.

it seemed like eternity, like time dragged on forever and ever. an eternity of your cries, your begs. she couldn't bring herself to stop, as each pound somehow turned worse than the last.

he eventually went limp. the strangled noises eventually came to a stop, but his loose body continued to exert blood from his lips, gurgling and dripping down his chin in endless trickles.

"y/n.. y/n..?"

two fingers were clicking in your face, snapping you out of your trance. they then took place under your chin, lifting your face to allow your eyes to drift upward.

"hey.. come back to me," she murmured, slowing her pace with you. she watched with concern, eyebrows knitting and eyes squinting. "you alright?"

you stared blankly at her. you remembered the bravery she claimed you had earlier that day, praying it would somehow, by miracle of a shooting star, manifest itself into you now. if you were brave, you'd leave. if you were brave, you'd tell her the truth about how you feel.

but you weren't. none of what she said was real; you weren't brave. you were scared, fearing the girl that cradled your face with her torment-stricken hands, yet with great depth fearing what you'd do without them. but after witnessing the pure agony she truly had the capacity to induce, you'd never succumb to her comfort again.

"yeah.. i-i'm fine, sorry." you mumbled, blinking repeatedly. how many more times could you bring yourself to lie, repeatedly, over and over? and what if she found you out? you knew she hated deceit, fabrication woven into your words and actions.

"good," you heard her mumble, dipping down to press her lips against the top of your head. "'m glad you're here, angel."

"yeah.. me too."

┊┊┊✧ ⁺ ⁺ 　°

this was so boring and messy i fear

this was sitting half complete in my drafts for at least 3 weeks. should've stayed that way if i'm honest x

i started reading pride & prejudice today :D along w tess of the d'urbervilles (im on ch15), i'm enjoying both so farrrrrrr

alec can go die though

i wanna start xmas hcs bc everyone seems to love the gf abby post (me too)

ok bye

im never writing an unplanned fic this long ever again! Xx i was gonna proofread this but i cba soz

also i said it was inspired by tbosas but i completely went off track so it became less inspired than i thought

ok bye fr

#ellie williams #lesbian #ellie tlou #ellie the last of us #ellie x reader #the last of us 2 #the last of us #wlw #tlou2 #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x you #angst #fluff #ellie williams x female reader #the hunger games #the ballad of songbirds and snakes

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thatscarletflycatcher · 9 months

Text

So you have heard Rick Astley was the unexpected sensation at Glastonbury this year...

and you'd like to get a taster of his music, but you don't know where to start, because you are only/mostly familiar with Never Gonna Give You Up?

This post is for you!

I'll give you a quick overview of his discography, and a recommendation of what I think are the best tracks of each album and why. Aggregated playlist at the bottom of the post.

Whenever You Need Somebody (1987)

This was Rick's debut album, and the one that included Never Gonna Give You Up. If you have heard the piece of trivia that says "if you drop the pitch Kylie Minogue's I Should Be So Lucky, it will sound like Rick Astley"... there's a very easy explanation for that: both were composed by Stock Aitken Waterman, a trio of music producers that wrote several of the most well known eurobeat hits of the late 80s and early 90s (i.e. You Spin Me Like a Record), based on the principles of... well, being very generic and catchy. Half of the tracks of this album were written by them.

Thematically the album is strangely obsessed with cheating, cheating women, and being in love with cheating women, and being heartbroken over them. I don't know what to tell you, sometimes I forget how common this was around that time for the romantic ballad outside of the US (?)

Anyways, of the 10 tracks of the original album, the best (and also most Never Gonna Give You Up-like) are Together Forever, Don't Say Goodbye, and Whenever You Need Somebody.

The album closes with a cover of When I Fall in Love, that to me feels very out of place. Perhaps it was one thing Rick himself was dead set on singing?

This album had a 15th anniversary expanded remaster in 2010, including 3 ""old-new"" songs and 4 remixes (one of them is an extended version of NGGYU). I'll Never Set You Free is remarkable for being one of the creepiest songs this side of Every Breath You Take.

The 2022 remaster:

This one includes one "old-new" track that is a severe earworm, My Arms Keep Missing You (it does deserve the THREE remixes it gets in this album), several remixes of other songs, three instrumentals, AND, most notably for me, three "reimaginings" of NGGYU, Together Forever, and Whenever You Need Somebody as slow piano ballads, very very worth listening if you are into that sort of thing (these were first released in the compilation album The Best of Me (2019)).

It also includes a new version of When I Fall in Love, that really highlights Rick's growth as a singer and an artist, very worth comparing the 1987 to the 2022 one.

The remixes and "old-new" tracks in these anniversary editions come from compilation albums Rick Astley - 12" Collection (1989) and Dance Mixes (1990).

2. Hold Me In Your Arms (1988)

If you liked Whenever You Need Somebody (1987), then Hold Me In Your Arms (1988) is just the thing for you, because it's more of the same, but louder, catchier, and now with less cheating obsession! This time it's 3 out of the 10 songs that are SAW written, one is a cover of The Temptations' Ain't Too Proud To Beg, and the remaining 6 are all by Rick himself, but the tone doesn't shift that much between them.

The first half of the album is non-stop top danceable tunes: She Wants to Dance With Me, Take Me To Your Heart, I Don't Want To Lose Her, Giving Up On Love (big involuntary "I'm killing off Sherlock Holmes" moment for Rick, the not giving up didn't even last a year :P), and Ain't Too Proud to Beg; the second half is not as strong, but also not bad either. It definitely helps that the tracks are ordered in such a way as to slowly slow down till the beautiful sweet soft ballad that closes the album and gives it its name: Hold Me In Your Arms.

I Don't Want to Be Your Lover, the penultimate track, is the first song that feels more like what Rick writes and sings as a more mature artist.

The 2010 expanded remaster is just remixes of some of these songs, I'll Be Fine (which is, quality wise, between the rest of the tracks of the second half) and My Arms Keep Missing You, again.

The 2022 remaster includes even more remixes, reimaginings of She Wants To Dance With Me and Hold Me In Your Arms (I'm not a big fan of either, but they are interesting, as they are much more modern ballad sounding) and instrumental versions of Take Me To Your Heart and She Wants To Dance With Me.

3. Free (1991)

Almost like a pun, this is Rick's first album "free" of SAW. He even grew out his hair! (probably one of the rare cases of a guy to having gorgeous hair that somehow suits his face horribly). The tone moves away from the 80s eurobeat hit into the soul-ish + gospel-ish ballad, which seems to be more like the territory he feels comfortable in. It's a bit of an "experimental" album, in the sense that he's trying new things and new sounds, but it's all very tentative, and the unsure footing is noticeable.

Even so, Cry For Help, written and sung by him was a hit all the same, although it isn't a favorite of mine. In general it's difficult for me to pick favorites here; none of the songs stick out to me as particularly good or particularly bad. If you like slow ballads, you will probably like Cry For Help, Wonderful You, and Behind the Smile. Really Got a Problem is a first sample of a "social" song in his repertoire. Move Right Out, Never Knew Love, and The Bottom Line are more the essence of what his music evolved into later on, whereas In The Name of Love, Be With You, and This Must Be Heaven are dead on the sort of generic adult-contemporary of the early 90s.

4. Body and Soul (1993)

This album takes a more... lounge-ish turn I do not relish. You'd say, okay, but what sets Rick Astley apart from the general adult standard lounge music of whatever decade he sings in? Difficult question to answer, as all questions about vibes are. To me it is a mixture of A) cringe is dead, long live cringe B) earnest feeling C) plain, direct and sometimes quirky lyrics D) It sounds like he's having a good time singing them.

I just cannot really buy the constant "baby" and "lover" in Everytime, for example. And while none of the songs in this album are bad, most of them aren't even fun. Body and Soul and Enough Love I think are the two most interesting tracks here.

That same year, Rick got on hiatus.

5. Keep It Turned On (2001)

This comeback album is a bit of a rarity -it was released in Germany, but never in the UK (although some of its tracks made it to compilations later on), and it's therefore rare to find, which is a pity, because I think it is one of his best!

It is also one of the most early 2000s sounding things ever. It is to 2000s eurobeat and pop ballad what Whenever You Need Somebody and Hold Me In Your Arms were to 1980s eurobeat and pop ballad, so if you are into it, this whole album will be for you.

I have a particularly soft spot for Sleeping, and the way it just sounds like what a 2001-2007 summer night sounded to me; it's very nostalgic. The lyrics, just like the ones in the ballad Breathe, give heartbreak what I perceive to be a more mature tone that I like much more than the treatment it gets in previous albums.

Other highlights are the very danceable Wanna Believe You and Keep It Turned On (this last one a very pick me up song), and on the ballad front, I think Romeo Loves Juliet has the most delicate, enjoyable sound, but Full of You has better lyrics.

6. Portrait (2005)

This album is a collection of covers of classic pop standards, so there isn't much rickness to it at all, and it is to me, personally, a skip; while I usually like Rick's covers in other albums (and I think his reimaginings of the SAW songs are interesting) these are... off. I just don't think the style he picked for them suits at all.

Between this and his following album, Rick released two independent singles: Lights Out (2010) and Superman (2012) which I think are both peak Rick and worth a listen; earnest, simple feeling and catchy sound.

7. 50 (2016)

This is my favorite Rick Astley album, and it seems I'm not alone in this! It was the first album of his to be number one since his debut one. He sung AND played all instruments for it, and it really feels like a personal project, that brings the artist close to the audience.

From the very title you know you are in for something: the 50, Rick's age in 2016, is a tongue-in-cheek homage to Adele (whose albums have all been titled after her age at the time of release), that also speaks of this sense of being a middle aged artist in an industry and particularly a genre or family of genres that leans so heavily into youth and coolness.

In 50 Rick leans on instead of shying away from the fact that he's not young (In either the heartfelt "Don't fake it, I can't take it/My heart is, close to breaking/It reminds me of my youth" or the humorous "I got to thirty and you show a little wrinkle/One more big plate/Now I'm putting on weight/Skinny jeans but nobody's fooled"), cool, or detached, but that doesn't make him jaded, heavy, or self important; the songs of this album are filled with a sense of hope, gratitude, generosity, and... fun. It's a curious marriage of the lighthearted beat of the pop that made him famous, and a mature version of the soul-ish style he seems to love and that he tried first in Free. Although there isn't a single skip in this album for me, the most representative, and that have what in my opinion is the best sound, are Keep Singing, Angels On My Side, Wish Away, Pieces, I Like the Sun, Let It Rain, Let it be Tonight.

8. Beautiful Life (2018)

There's little I can say about Beautiful Life in general, other than characterize it as an echo of 50. Same ideas, same themes, same tone and sound.

The highlight tracks are: Beautiful Life, Last Night on Earth, Rise Up, and Try.

Since Beautiful Life, Rick has released a compilation album (The Best of Me, 2019), a few remixes and a couple new singles; of those singles I'd highlight Giant (a true banger), Every One Of Us, and Unwanted.

Rick's next album, Are We There Yet? releases in October this year (2023).

#Rick Astley #music #discography overview #nostalgia

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sjfwrites · 8 months

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Thoughts during my Ballad re read (spoilers)

1. Aurora, is she going to cause problems for Eva and Jacks?

A panicked slightly when I read the Hollow scenes and guessed she might have been the first fox (then remembered she’s alive)

2. The ghost wolf from Eva and Apollos wedding - Apollo says, “charm one and you’ll received a gift, maybe even love.)

A wolf befriended Jacks at the party. Does he received a new true love as a gift?

3. What is going to draw Jacks back to Eva in Curse?

At the end of Ballad Jacks has kind of achieved what he set out to do. He might not have gone back in time but Eva can’t remember him, just as wanted.

He could leave her to live her life happily with Apollo and he won’t risk killing her. Something has to bring him back to her, is he going to discover early on that he has a chance to be with her, or will it simply be jealousy and rescuing her from Apollo?

These last ones aren’t questions so much as hopes,

I really want Evajacks to reunite at a masked ball. Or I need them to dance at some point and he will do his best to charm her, probably with lots of twirls and dips

I need him to communicate with her through her dreams!!!

#tbona spoilers #evajacks #ouabh 3 #ouabh spoilers #acftl spoilers #the ballad of never after #jacks prince of hearts

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suedesongs · 29 days

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These Are The Suede Songs 001: Early Recordings

Suede’s early trajectory is often described, especially by the band themselves, as “the world’s longest overnight success”. Four years of slogging the toilets of London, from playing humiliating gigs to, on one occasion, nobody at all, to appearing on the front page of Melody Maker, may sound quick, but in musical terms can feel like a lifetime. This was during the era of musical trends coming and going in rapid succession, a little like fashion microtrends today. Within those four years, Baggy and the Second Summer of Love, The Stone Roses and Spike Island, raves and ecstasy, made way for American grunge - precisely the opposite, and amongst this cultural shift, quietly grafting their way, were Suede.

Whilst there aren’t a great deal of surviving bootlegs or demos from this era, I still felt incredibly compelled to cover what I could find in a dedicated post. Research was rather fruitless at times, and I found much of the writing on this period of the band’s career to be marred (cough) by the insistence of male writers to throw all of their energy into a somewhat troubling obsession with what is perceived as the infamous Anderson-Frischmann-Albarn “love triangle”. I took to Twitter (or, blegh, X) to vent my frustrations, and received a reply from my friend Tasha who, much more eloquently than I, expressed how Justine Frischmann is viewed as merely an object in an interpersonal drama, rather than a fleshed out musician in her own right. Are women doomed to simply be accessories to their male counterparts? I find this disheartening when Frischmann is so integral to not only the Suede “story”, but, in my opinion, to what would go on to become the sound we all know, and love.

My analysis will frequently include my personal opinions, and should not be taken as definitive. Where necessary to the discussion of the songs, tidbits of info may be provided in order to “set the scene”. This series should not be used as a biography, but instead an exploration of a body of work. It will be by no means objective. I’m a massive Suede fan. I’ve travelled up and down the country for gigs, queued from as early as 6am for a coveted barrier spot, my cat is (in a roundabout way) named after an obscure Bloodsports-era B Side. I’m a self-professed fangirl. Having said this, I’ll do my best to not let this get in the way. And with all of the preliminaries seen to, we begin with,

Just A Girl (Anderson/Frischmann)

Though credited to Anderson-Butler, this light, airy folk ballad is reportedly the oldest surviving Suede tune, dating far before Bernard Butler joined. The version that appears online, and on the deluxe edition of the debut, is likely a home demo recorded by Brett Anderson and Justine Frischmann.

Anderson, in his memoir Coal Black Mornings, explains the titular girl, “north of England way”, is a Middlesborough-born Chemistry student called Emily, with whom he shared a flat on Daisy Bank road in Longsight, Manchester, in the year after he moved from Haywards Heath to the rainy industrial Northern city. ‘Just A Girl’ really couldn’t be set in any city other than Manchester. It describes the beginnings of a fond friendship, perhaps more, distinctly against the backdrop of a harsh, wet winter, overlooked by grey skies and red-bricked former warehouses. It’s the first, blushing, awkward flushes of young love. It’s leaving your University lectures at half past three when it’s already pitch dark. It’s when you say something you shouldn’t to the person you fancy after a few drinks. It’s huddling under the covers to stay warm, the excitement of closeness and companionship.

I typically have a complete, and near visceral, aversion to anything, musically or otherwise, that can be described as “twee”. Just A Girl, I feel, does undeniably dangle its harmonies and lyrical depictions of turning the page of one’s favourite book perilously close to the jaws of this accusation.Yet, I simply cannot bring myself to dislike it. Whilst musically competent, if a little naive, it’s sweet and genuine, and for that, it’s rather lovely.

There are already some allusions to Anderson’s later lyrical themes; the combination of love and tragedy as he laments how “it could have been so different if we’d only had more time”. Anderson, as we’ll explore, is rarely one to write a straight love song. No matter how they may seem, there is always a thread of tragedy, or drama, which underpins the affair and protects against it veering into saccharine territory.

For a few years now, I’ve cited the “ashtray eyes and bootlace ties” line to be a direct harbinger of some of Anderson’s later lyrics, most likely thinking of 2011's ‘Brittle Heart’,from his solo album Black Rainbows. However, this is in fact, lifted from Ian Drury’s ‘Sweet Gene Vincent’, more directly alluded to with Anderson and Frischmann lamenting how “Sweet Gene Vincent was never that good”.

According to Anderson, on regular rotation on the turntables of himself, Frischmann and Mat Osman around this time, were a band called The Lilac Time. Quoted in David Barnett’s comprehensive biography, Love And Poison, he describes them as “quite light, leftfield pop sort of thing (...) lots of major seventh chords”, and this influence is abundantly clear on ‘Just A Girl’, and would have possibly done even more had it made it to the studio around this time.

Frischmann’s, when she and Anderson met, record collection was largely comprised of folk music. In an irritating display of arrogance, Anderson insisted that these records would “no longer be listened to '' with him now in the equation. This decision would, of course, prove seminal in the trajectory of Frischmann’s music career in Elastica, as Anderson introduced her to spiky post-punk, however I find this to be rather ironic considering the undeniable folky nature of this particular song.

‘Just A Girl’ would later be re-recorded by Anderson and Richard Oakes, possibly around 1994, though reports of this vary, but not released to the public until a B-side was required for the single ‘Attitude’ in 2003. More on that (much) later, of course.

Natural Born Servant (Anderson-Butler)

‘Natural Born Servant’ is the actual first song in our timeline to be written by Anderson-Butler, and sees Suede as close to flirting with Baggy as they ever would.

As a result, this one comes across as rather trite, not to mention overlong, clocking in at six minutes and twenty seconds.

During my initial re-listen in my research for this project, I found myself incredibly puzzled as the chugging, Madchester intro spluttered into a half-hearted groove, before realising I’d gotten it entirely confused with a later track, ‘Be My God’. Frischmann shows herself a competent backing vocalist, possibly more so than Anderson. One YouTube commenter, possibly humorously, alludes to him “doing a Phil Oakey”, and there is indeed a resemblance. Anderson’s, however, is more naive, though he can certainly carry a tune and his voice is pleasant and sweet, possibly to the song’s detriment, when one considers the subject matter.

Much like a large proportion of Suede’s work, ‘...Servant’ sees Anderson dallying with sexual imagery, and more specifically, BDSM imagery. This attempt, however, whilst enjoyable enough, is surprisingly sexless. It’s almost a feat in itself to write about sex in such a decidedly virginal manner, but I’m glad this was a theme he stuck with throughout his lyrics and it hints at greatness yet to come. More interestingly, however, is the use of sexual imagery as a commentary on class struggle. “You’re a natural born servant/this is the time to open your eyes”, can be viewed as a submissive accepting their place, or a working class individual gaining class consciousness and becoming aware of their oppression in society.

I must say, I’m glad that this was as far as Suede’s relationship with Baggy really went, at least in the recordings I could find and actively listen to. It’s common to speculate of a song like ‘...Servant’ being indicative of a type of “alternate universe” Suede, but I couldn’t disagree more with this. Suede and Baggy just doesn’t work, and they would have always found their sound one way or another.

Justice (Unknown, possibly Anderson-Frischmann-Butler)

Surprisingly, this is the only song of this lot that I find myself drawn to the YouTube search bar to listen to out of choice. It’s almost certainly my personal favourite of all of the pieces we’ve covered here.I even found myself lip syncing to the chorus as I wrote this very paragraph! Oddly, I can’t find too much to say about it. It’s a sweet little, possibly even catchy, slice of Jangle pop. One of the thousands of happy-sad breakup songs of the late 1980s and very early 1990s. Anderson likens it to Aztec Camera’s ‘Oblivious’, which is a far, far better citation than the endless Smiths comparisons I once myself fell privy to, which have since become a cliche.

We again hear Anderson’s vocals not quite having come into themselves yet, there’s a hint of insecurity and hesitancy. They’re so far removed from what we understand as his vocal styling, that one YouTube commenter on the version I found asks if Butler sings vocals. There is present, however, a deep understanding of melody and an undeniable hookiness. I can see myself going back to this one for the odd listen.

Wonderful Sometimes (Unknown, possibly Anderson-Butler)

Gary Crowley, the geezer-ish presenter of the Sunday Afternoon show Greater London Radio, was the host of Demo Clash; a competition held each Sunday on the aforementioned radio station. As the title suggests, this was a show where London bands would send in demos, that would go head-to-head in a public vote. As pointed out in Love and Poison, however, this would largely amount to a game of “who has the most mates”. Anderson would later show dismissal, if not outright disdain for ‘Wonderful Sometimes’. In Dave Thompson’s Suede The Next Life, First Time Around, he describes the song as “shit (...) nothing to get interested in. (...) [GLR] was a little local station, and we’re talking about London where everyone’s in a band.” Still, it would end up on a compilation cassette called What The World Is Waiting For compiled by Adrian Gibson, programmer at Powerhaus on Liverpool Road, N1.

According to the Discogs listing, the idea was to showcase ten up-and-coming bands who were performing at the venue during this time (from a title like that, go figure). There was additionally a launch night at The Powerhaus, and Gibson was interviewed by Crowley to promote the gig.

As for the song itself? ‘Wonderful Sometimes’ contains a few witty one-liners, “you couldn’t liven us up with a cattle prod” and “i’ve heard of happy ever after / it was just a joke but you could die laughing” particularly stick out. Personally, I quite enjoy “Do I just love you ‘cause you look quite good”, but that’s because, as a young-ish woman and a passionate fan, this is an accusation I’ve had levelled at me in the past, and I know I’m not the only one!

‘...Sometimes’ is viewed by many as the holy grail of early Suede recordings, but for something so revered, it’s a decent enough piece of music, but it’s nothing special, even in the context of the other songs we’ve covered. Musically, I try to avoid Smiths comparisons, but here it’s unavoidable as the whiff of William, It Was Really Nothing and even some base notes of Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now, is enough to give you a migraine. Butler’s playing really is more Marr-ish than Marr, but drenched and sadistically drowned in a wah-wah pedal at times, eliciting a comparison to Fool’s Gold, though, mercifully, this is over much sooner.

More excitingly is a noticeable shift in Anderson’s vocal styling, now carrying slightly more confidence and having something of a personality. Here, he’s sounding almost like Robert Smith of The Cure, minus the “Robert Smith-isms”. A deliberately but self-consciously Sussex drawl (The Cure, and Smith, were from up the road from Haywards Heath in Crawley), and a slight nasal intonation.

Ultimately, I don’t so much understand the hype around this one - the reviews on RateYourMusic are unanimously positive, but it’s a jolly tune and, likely because of that, decidedly un-Suede.

#suede #suede band #brett anderson #justine frischmann #mat osman #bernard butler

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daydreamingatnight209 · 5 months

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The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes- Analysis 🐍🌹

- I found this story very compelling and interesting as we finally get to learn how Snow becomes the dictator we see in the original Hunger games books/films. Telling the story 64 years earlier adds more depth and complexity to the character. In the book you see the internal struggle Coryo has with himself and his morals. He had so much potential to be a good person and in the first half of the book at least you can see that potential where he tries his best to stay on the right side of the that line This stands out to me particularly when he states that “if he didn’t have honour he had nothing, no more deception… from now on he’d live honestly and if he ended up as a beggar, at least he would be a decent one”. You see here that he is at the very least attempting to stay on the right side of the line and be a good person.

- The books shows that at a time 64 years before his rule Coryo does indeed feel things like shame/ guilt ( for his and other peoples actions) relief and very brief moments of happiness before his conscience is overridden.

- I don’t defend his behaviours or actions but thanks to the book I can understand and depict his psyche to see that his actions were influenced by those who were around him. While Tigress was a good influence and saw good in him, people like Dr. Gaul and his grandmother who see those in the districts as rebels and as the enemy push such thoughts onto Snow exploiting his paranoia and unease. Alongside this Coryo notes briefly that perhaps it’s the pressures of living up to his family name and status that leads to a lot of the situations he finds himself in and that the name sometimes feels more like a hindrance then an advantage (Page 327) and that he felt like he’d most likely be a disappointment to his father. (Page 378)

- Dr. Gaul sees Snow’s ambition and pride and uses it to her advantage to exploit him as she sees potential in him for evil and it can even said that she sees herself in young Coriolanus. I think realistically for such a dystopian world, after everything Coryo has heard, seen and been through it probably isn’t surprising that he turns out the way he does but it is disappointing because in the beginning he wasn’t so evil, he showed us glimpses of goodness and what could of been had he been mentally stronger.

- A driving force that comes with Coryo is his family. When you learn of his family situation you find that they are poor despite appearances and Coryo is desperate to fix this and live through his father’s legacy. This is where his faults leak though as a lot of his choices are for his family in his mind even though they are seen as wrong or immoral.

- As the story continues we see that Coryo’s ambitions and pride seem to control him as he cares more for wealth and his reputation rather than caring for others or seeing other people as human, this is when he crosses the line into evil rather than staying good.

- When it comes to love, once again it comes down to potential. Coryo spoke kindly of his mother and despite the fact that he has clear trust issues I think that he was at one point he was capable of some sort of level of love, both him and Lucy Gray have there moments with each other and in the book he states that he “felt remarkably close” and that he was “genuinely fond” of her quite early on even almost crying with her the night before the games (which shows a level of empathy and compassion) and the fact that the both of them believe that their ‘love’ was written in the stars.

- People underestimate how powerful of a feeling love truly is. It’s such a powerful emotion that can make us feel and do a number of things for those we care for. I’d like to believe after analysing Coryo’s monologue regarding Lucy Gray that he did love her, at least to the best of his capability. I saw a post online that I believe sums up Coryo and Lucy’s dynamic and it’s that love doesn’t always display itself as positive. Love can sometimes be unhealthy and toxic but it doesn’t mean that the couple don’t feel deeply for one another. Coryo and Lucy Gray’s love wasn’t exactly the picture of the perfect relationship, that’s impossible in such a dystopian world but that’s not to say that they didn’t feel something for one another especially after everything they had been through, it was just that both of their need for different things and self preservation was the stronger emotion.

- At the end of the book it’s Coriolanus paranoia that wins in the end and shows us truly the beginning of his evilness and his descent into controlled madness. We see exactly when ambition, pride and wealth become more important to him than being with Lucy Gray. He sees an opportunity to get his life back in the capitol and takes it without even considering his feelings for his lover and what she would wants. It’s about him and him only.

- Although it is important to note that Lucy Gray is isn’t innocent as it seems on the surface. She will do what needs to be done to survive and protect herself, similarly to how Snow protects himself. She Strikes Snow with a snake while attempting to escape but also taunts him with the music he learned to love from her making him slide deeper into hatred, anger and paranoia. Lucy Gray is also described as clever and devious, showing the reader that her innocence and charm is only part of her. Snow may be a villain but I would consider Lucy Gray as an anti hero. She’s a relatable and likeable character in comparison to who Snow becomes but it obvious at the end that it’s impossible to retain your innocence and all levels goodness (this isn’t me saying that you can’t be good, just that you aren’t as pure as you are when born) in a world like Panem and The Hunger games. You do what you have to do survive.

- It can be considered debatable on if Coriolanus is a prime example of nature vs nurture.

- I do feel sorry for Tigris because she had so much hope for Coryo and he left her with so much to deal with in regards to their family and although Coryo does become successful and money is no longer as issue Tigris can see that Coryo has lost his way and has changed which upsets her deeply.

- Last but definitely not least I want to mention the scene with Reaper and the Capitol flag. It definitely had more of an impact visually and I’m glad that they kept it in the film.

#writing #writers on tumblr #the hunger games #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #lucy gray baird #coriolanus snow #suzanne collins #tom blyth #tom blyth x reader #tom blyth x you #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus x lucy gray #coriolanus x you #rachel zegler #book review #film review

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blueskittlesart · 2 years

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omg wait- please give us your thoughts botw women!

im skipping zelda because i talk about her all the time but this is mipha, urbosa (and riju), impa, and purah lol. it's LONG so prepare yourself

mipha. ive said before that i think she was done dirty by the writers in that all of her characterization revolves around men. and i stand by that. i generally dislike the archetype of a physically small, softspoken female supporting character whose only role in the story is as a protector or healer--someone for the male characters to bounce their feelings off of. and i think mipha very often falls into this trope. with that being said, i do still think there is room for a nuanced analysis of her character because there IS nuance there it just gets lost a lot of the time because of how she's written. When thinking about her it's important to remember how zora age in relationship to humans. after a lot of math i place her at around 60ish years old physically, with that being the zora equivalent of a 14-16 year old hylian. she is INCREDIBLY young by zora standards but physically, she has lived longer than almost every non-zora she will ever meet. because of this, there's this dissonance between the way her family and kingdom view her vs the way her friends and colleagues view her. We see it most obviously in the champion's ballad dlc--when zelda speaks to mipha about piloting a divine beast, she speaks as though she's talking to an adult. but mipha's father is convinced she is far too young and inexperienced for this role. Mipha, in turn, is caught between these two differing perceptions of herself, to the point where she doesn't really KNOW what she's supposed to be. she takes on a protective role for those younger than her (sidon and link, specifically) and does her best to support zelda where she can, knowing that zelda likely views her as a senior, but she also often vant disguise the fact that she's still a child herself. she plays with sidon in the waterfall. she has a very childish, innocent schoolgirl crush on link. she's caught in between these two perceptions of herself and because she is, for all intents and purposes, mentally fifteen years old, she doesn't quite know how to handle it. The fact that zora live on a totally different time scale compared to other hyrulian races isn't something that would normally pose much of a struggle for them, because zora's domain is deliberately isolated from those other races. zora could likely go a generation or two without ever needing to interact with non-zora at all, beyond the occasional stray traveler. (remember how when you're working your way towards zora's domain post-calamity, you meet a bunch of zora who are super excited to see a hylian at all? most of those zora look to be in early adulthood, meaning by my math they'd be about a hundred years old. post-calamity, zora's domain clearly returns to that same brand of isolation, so most of these zora have probably never interacted with a hylian at all.) but because mipha happened to be born into such a turbulent era, she finds herself having to interact with these other races more than basically any zora ruler might have had to for the past several thousand years. which is why she has so much trouble with link. from her perspective, he changes SO fast. she meets him one day a wide-eyed child and the next he comes back to her a silent, traumatized soldier. she's hardly aged a day but he has experienced a lifetime of things she can't begin to understand and she has NO IDEA how to talk to him anymore. When they interact, she switches awkwardly between treating him like the child she knew and attempting to fix the trauma he's been through without her, but it's always with the goal of getting things BACK TO THE WAY THEY WERE. she is completely incapable of moving on from the past relationship with link that she remembers because as far as she's concerned, it's only been a miniscule amount of time since then. due to the nature of her race, mipha is basically doomed to be stuck in a past that link can never return to. god. i wish they explored her character more in-game im going to lose my mind

urbosa is SUCH a good character. agh. her narrative purpose is essentially to be an actual POSITIVE mentor to zelda, which. let's be honest. without her that poor girl would absolutely not have made it to seventeen. jesus christ. Anyways urbosa is everything zelda wants to be. A strong, independent, powerful ruling force that her people rely on and look to in times of need. she is completely self-assured and confident and she is quite honestly literally the only positive influence on zelda's life. Urbosa is a character well into adulthood, who we can assume has long since grown into herself and found her way. Which is why she is SUCH an important character for zelda, yes, but for ALL the young champions who are just. so desperate for a positive force in their lives. She's so GOOD at what she does, too. urbosa is a woman who was meant to be a mother in one way or another, i think, because the way she handles the kids she's working with is really thoughtful and well-done, ESPECIALLY when compared to the other dogshit adults in their lives. She allows zelda more compassion than anyone else has ever seen fit to give her, and when zelda DOES mess up, urbosa offers gentle but firm redirection. (in aoc specifically, she notices zelda comparing herself to link and immediately shuts it down, WITHOUT making zelda feel stupid or inferior.) she does the exact same thing, albeit less overtly, with link, who she obviously has a lot of compassion for despite being kind of at odds with him over zelda. I think she and link are actually incredibly similar characters--stubborn, a little bit showy, and generally unwilling to admit defeat in any situation. She's uniquely positioned to be able to relate to both him AND zelda, as a ruler AND a soldier. And i think she's completely aware of how similar she is to link, which is why when she pushes him, she does it in a calculated way so that he never takes it as a challenge or an attack. she never outright tells him "this is why zelda dislikes you, you need to work on your communication skills" she talks to him about zelda's childhood in plain terms because she knows that breaking down link's mental wall between himself and zelda by evoking empathy is the way to get the two of them to fucking COMMUNICATE WITH EACH OTHER. i really think every game should have an overwhelmingly positive female mentor figure like urbosa. she is so good

in relation to urbosa, we then have riju, the youngest and only female of the new champions. she is fourteen years old and she has been thrust into a position of leadership and she works so hard to project that same confidence and maturity that was urbosa's staple. and to her credit she ALMOST gets there but she's fourteen and no fourteen year old is capable of performing adulthood perfectly. Riju's projected personality feels very much like she's regurgitating stories she was told about her ancestors. Urbosa was strong, urbosa was fearless, urbosa commanded lightning, urbosa stepped up to serve the knight and princess when asked. but, crucially, urbosa was not fourteen. riju's insecurities about filling urbosa's shoes are incredibly evident, but she seems to do her best work when she drops the pretense and acts as herself. there's a reason she had us fight naboris on sand seals--they're a source of comfort to her. something she KNOWS she can act confident about. there was no acting involved in her pursuit of naboris--she KNEW she was good with that seal. there's also something to be said about the successor to urbosa, the mentor, being an inexperienced little girl. riju clings to the stories of the champion chief who came before her because she desperately needs a mentor. I wish urbosa could meet her for real she deserves a mom

impa. i. well i wish 90% of her characterization didn't come from hyrule warriors bc i honestly dont like how she was written all that much. i think they had a really strong framework to build off of in botw but aoc just kind of. took it in a direction i wasn't a huge fan of. anyway. impa is sheikah, a race descended from the original protectors of the goddess hylia. Interestingly, in botw the sheikah have been almost completely integrated into hylian society, with kakariko village being mostly sheikah who live like regular hylians. it seems like very few of them actually follow the ways of their ancestors, in contrast to other games where sheikah were only ever warrior bodyguards of the goddess hylia's bloodline. Impa is, presumably, one of the few sheikah who continues to follow the teachings of her ancestors and serve the royal family. this... honestly causes a dillemma if you think about it for more than a few seconds, because, since most sheikah live as regular citizens now, in place of sheikah bodyguards the hylian royal family has an extensive royal guard, eliminating the need for sheikah warriors like impa almost entirely. i can only assume this is why she was relegated to basically 'haha funny quirky ninja sidekick' in hyrule warriors. but personally i think it would have been much more interesting to use this as a commentary on the state of hyrule and even to give her some more obvious internal conflict!! hyrule has until now been in a ten thousand year era of peace. it's no wonder most sheikah settled down and gave up on the whole bodyguard thing. they might have even believed there wasn't going to be another demise incarnation for them to take action against, especially after ten thousand years without any whisper of conflict. to most sheikah, pursuing their traditional martial arts and continuing to serve the royal family would likely begin to feel like a waste of time. for some reason, though, impa didn't feel this way. ten thousand years after the last conflict between demise and hylia's descendants, impa still chooses to train as a sheikah warrior and serve the royal family. why?? my personal headcanon is that she was drawn to the myth of ancient hyrule in the same way that purah was drawn to its technology. purah is the more obvious nerd of the sisters, but i think impa's choice to pursue sheikah martial arts HAD to have its basis in an interest in the creation myth. She is also one of the few characters in botw who explicitly KNOWS and can convey to you the myth in its entirety, or at least, as much of the myth as had survived by the time she began studying it. So here we have a young sheikah girl who is incredibly interested in her own culture as it relates to the myth of hyrule and she's basically singlehandedly attempting to revive a part of it that's been nearly completely lost, all amidst this incredibly tense political environment in which her peoples' past inventions are also being dug up and revived by the royal family with like... seemingly very little care to the context in which they were made or why they might have been buried in the first place. like, in this climate which shows a subtle but obvious disregard for her culture, impa is loudly, deliberately returning to her roots. that's SO INTERESTING!! if aoc had leaned into it more, we could have had moments where impa contemplates her place among the royal guardsmen and the champions--she's not quite one of them, but they have a mutual goal and, in the case of the champions, their lives are all deeply intertwined with the myth of hyrule; or even a bit of commentary on the political climate of hyrule pre-calamity and how fucking horrible it was. i REALLY wish they had explored this more it could have been so cool

PURAH. people think im insane when i tell them shes in my top five loz characters of all time but i am literally obsessed with her i dont care that shes a random new addition to botw only. i think she is a really interesting way to introduce and lead into the idea of ancient sheikah technology. considering how important ancient sheikah tech is to the worldbuilding of botw, giving the player a sheikah scientist guide to walk you through it all is a smart way to go about introducing it. beyond that, though, i think as a character she serves as a reminder of hyrule before the calamity--cheerful and carefree despite the obvious dark implications of her actions. when you first go to meet her you find out along the way that the kids in hateno are scared of her; they think she's a ghost or something along those lines. she is eccentric and strange and she just sort of... glosses over the entire series of events that led both her and link to their present situation, because by de-aging herself, accidentally or not, she has become stuck perpetually in the mindset of pre-calamity hyrule. She still views sheikah tech as something interesting to be studied and played with while most sane people in hyrule view it as nothing but an incredible danger. she's super intelligent, but can't quite break out of the scientist mentality enough to acknowledge the harm the tech she so obviously loves is capable of causing. the de-aging and the bubbly personality are likely a coping mechanism, i think, though maybe not a conscious one. she's remaining frozen in time forever, deliberately refusing to think about the damage she might have caused. I don't think she's ENTIRELY in denial though, if only because she helps link when he asks for it. she's been waiting for a hundred years, never quite sure if the shrine of resurrection worked or if she laid link to rest forever in that cave, so she does whatever she can to keep living, preparing for the worst. When link DOES reappear, it's a genuine shock, to the point that she cant quite let go of the denial she's been using to keep herself going for the past 100 years. but just because she expected the worst doesn't mean she can't work with a better outcome, it just means she isn't quite prepared to deal with it perfectly, which is why she seems frozen in time when you interact with her in botw.

#WOMENNNNN. AGH #loz has a bad track record with female characters but the botw girls are so genuinely good. i love it #zelda analysis #asks

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darksideofthemamon · 6 months

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The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes movie vs book trivia

When I heard that The Ballad of Songbirds And Snakes was getting a movie, I was excited. Excited, but, a bit worried because as much as I liked the book, it was kinda long and did drag in some parts. I was worried how this would be onscreen.

Turns out they found a way to make it work! The 10th Hunger Games was way more action-packed in the movie than it was in the books, and that kept me engaged as a viewer.

On that note, here are some book-movie comparisons and trivia! This isn't a criticism nor is it a complete list. It's just a fun trivia post because I found the differences fascinating and need to ramble

Full spoilers for both book and movie!

First-scene cannibalism

I don't recall them getting into this in the movie, so here's some trivia: the guy who commits cannibalism at the very start of the movie is, in the book, the Snows' neighbor Nero Price, a titan in the railroad industry, and Tigris and Coriolanus recognize the person whose leg he was sawing off as the maid of the Cranes (whom the Snows also knew).

Nero has a daughter who is Coriolanus's classmate and fellow mentor in the 10th Hunger Games, Persephone Price. She and Coriolanus's best friend, Festus Creed, become close, which grosses Coriolanus out to no end.

[Festus and Persephone had] been spending time together, trying to come up with a joint strategy for their tributes, and Coriolanus could see that Festus was falling for her. Did you tell your best friend his crush was a cannibal? Never a rule book when you needed one.

2. Felix Ravinstill doesn't die in the book

The one who dies originally from the bombing is another classmate, a minor character named Gauis Breen.

This is one of the changes in the film that I think enhanced it! It's just a lot more impactful if the death of the president's son is what pushes Dr. Gaul to unleash the rainbow snakes.

3. Clemensia's fate, Coriolanus's offenses

"You're quite the rebel." "I'm bad news, alright"

It surprised me quite a bit when this happened pretty early on in the film. In the book, stealing food from the Academy is a major offense, and Coriolanus doesn't take to being called a rebel until after Clemensia gets bitten by Dr. Gaul's snakes (an event that really shook his belief in the Capitol as it showed him that even Capitol children were, in fact, not safe from the Capitol).

In the movie though, he does it before visiting Lucy Gray in the zoo (the same scene where Arachne dies).

On that note, the movie only shows the compact and hankerchief as his damning evidence. The book includes the napkin he stole from the Academy that got lost in the bombing.

4. Weaponized drones

In the movie, Coriolanus spams water bottles to distract the other Tributes from Lucy Gray. In the book, weaponizing a drone was a tactic used by the District 3 tributes, Circ and Teslee.

5. Lysistrata is more proactive in the books

In the movie, Coriolanus needs to ask Lysistrata to weaponize water against her own tribute, Jessup.

The book not only has Lysistrata display more knowledge of medicine (as her parents are President Ravinstill's personal physicians), but also has her be the one to initiate protecting Lucy Gray from Jessup.

In the film, Coriolanus says "Send him a drone." In the book, Lysistrata says "No, let me. He's my tribute, after all." (Then Coriolanus tries to refuse, but she insists).

6. Lamina was portrayed as more "impressive" in the book

I found this one really fascinating as I was watching it play out.

Lamina, at the start of the movie, was always crying. Then she climbed a beam and killed Marcus.

The physicality of climbing up that beam is treated as more impressive in the books, with Lamina's surprising strength, agility, and balance being attributed to her coming from the lumber district, District 7. After mercy-killing Marcus, she stays up on the beam, which is acknowledged as a good strategy, implying that she might actually win.

It wasn't a bad strategy. Safer than on the ground, for sure. She had a plan. She could kill. In less than an hour, Lamina had redefined herself as a contender in the Games.

While Lamina does all these in the film, less attention is called to it.

I liked that in the book because it showed us how swiftly tributes can go from underdogs to contenders with skills apart from brute strength.

7. Dill and Wovey's deaths get swapped

Another good change they made for the movie!

In the book, Dill (District 11) dies of natural causes (tuberculosis) while Wovey (District 8) dies of Lucy Gray's rat poison. We don't see Lucy Gray's reaction to this.

But in the movie, Wovey dies from the snakes, while Dill drinks poisoned water, which we see Lucy Gray's regretful reaction to.

I think this was such an impactful change they made for the movie. Why? Because Dill is District 11's female tribute... just like Rue. Except in the 74th Hunger Games, District 12 female (Katniss) regrets not being able to save Rue. In the 10th, Lucy Gray regrets accidentally killing Dill.

8. Treech does not die from rat poison in the book

He instead dies from one of Dr. Gaul's poisonous snakes that Lucy Gray kept in her pocket. On that note...

9. Snakes were not the climax (Reaper was)

The Games don't end with everyone covered in rainbow snakes. Some of the tributes survive, and the next day most of the snakes are dead (because some muttations don't survive well out of the lab).

Rainbow snakes made for a great climax though! Additionally...

10. Coral was not the final boss/main rival in the book (Reaper was)

Though she was a deadly opponent, she wasn't the last one Lucy Gray had to fight. In the movie, Coral dies from rainbow snakes, all while pleading with Lucy Gray, while Reaper accepts his fate as the snakes get him.

In the book, Coral dies from the snakes, but Reaper survives. Then there's a bit of a waiting game the next day until Reaper drinks from a puddle of poisoned water. All that said...

11. Lucy Gray flat-out wins in the book

But in the movie, Dr. Gaul was ready to kill all the tributes with her snakes, but then Coriolanus, backed by the student body, shouted for her to let Lucy Gray go. And she does.

This was such a great change for the movie because not only was it more climactic, but it very much reminds us of the power audience reaction has over the Hunger Games ("if it weren't for the baby", and such)

#hunger games #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #spoilers #just my thoughts #darksideofthemamon

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