anyways hassel and brassius are qpps and you cant change my mind

ok newsletter euphoria has worn off i hate love again

this is me asking about your grandberry pirate gillion au :0

YESYAYYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this spawned cuz of a swordfish supercut and also the joke lizzie made abt "you come on this ship you're my crew"

ok SOOO its canon-compliant UP until 53/57, around there ! gilly takes Not Ferin Well a whole lot worse, especially the almost jay betrayal! hes basically the same as he is in canon (atleast to jay and chip) but hes so upset over jay lying to them this whole time even after what theyve been through together. lizzie and caspian roll up on the half a ship and yk yk, gill goes to help and lizzie makes the "hes on my ship, hes on my crew" and. gill just thinks shes serious and hes shocked and then kind of relieved? he didnt know how to confront chip and jay about what happened on block and now he doesnt have to! and so he just. says goodbye to jay and chip and lizzie is like oh shit youre fr? ok welcome aboard. LOL .

jay and chip take this as well as youd expect! theyre obviously very betrayed and upset, and chip is mad at both gill but also Lizzie cuz in his mind she has just taken his best friend away from her :( they go their separate ways after an argument between all of them (mainly gill, lizzie and chip) and jay keeps trying to convince chip to go back, chip keeps trying to sail them forward and is even more deadset on finding arlin now (they drop off ollie way sooner, as soon as they get to zero-- which they leave for after allport)

gill would start to feel guilty but also the training hes doing with caspian and lizzie starts to help him, and hes also coming to terms with being in the oversea and in his mind the grandberry ship is helping him a lot!

anyways a lot of time passes, both ships go on canon-compliant adventures (HOWEVER. grandberry pirates fight off against the navy a lot more than riptide crew does in canon, so gill is also dealing with that .)

since it starts out near ep 50ish, its near ep 100 where they are reunited (in the black sea!) niklaus tempts lizzie (and by proxy the rest of the crew) by saying if they go and help him with what he needs (which is uh. gillion. its the same thing he wants gill to do in canon) that he will bring ava back (he can Totally do that guys.) and then he gets A BIT SILLY and goes to riptide pirate crew (atp theyd have all the normal npcs minus queen cuz that was all gillion's doing) and is like. Do you Want your Fish Guy? Hes somewhere in the black sea. find him for me and ill make sure he comes back to you guys . :D (he can also Totally do that.)

they meet in the black sea, have the same battle they did when they first got there (both albatross and grandberry together) and gill is still the one who saves jay which leads to sillyness ^_^ gill and jay . talk it out and whatnot, chip (once he stops refusing to talk to gill) and gill argue about it and have. surprise. another ice arena moment. theyre so insane.

---also extra notes--- :D

i dont exactly think hed say hes happier on the grandberry ship than with chip n jay i just . think hes definitely less worried about being the main protector? he knows caspian and lizzie can hold their own (not saying jay and chip cant its just .. you know..) and is living with a lot less stress and also has worked through undersea trauma like how he does in canon except with lizzie and caspian so . hes definitely living a better life, and if offered a place back on the riptide crew he wouldnt just abandon lizzie and caspian after all that especially cuz he still has lingering pain from jay betrayal ^_^

has lizzie/ava (past), swordfish QPR (i love them), liz/casp (QPR) (have you heard how caspian talks abt liz?), and uh........ yeah thats it.

also little idea idk where to fit in here . thinking abt gill missing ollie and chip (once theyve made up) being like "the three of us can go back to Zero and see him!" and gill is just like .. "chip this is my family now, im so much happier here than I have been (OUCH.) I can't in good conscious rejoin you as a riptide pirate after i've spent so long with as a grandberry pirate. However I would Like to see ollie." but both ships go and see ollie bc. yeah ^_^. chip is. devastated :(

hes much stronger and also slightly crazier! the navy trying to kill you will do that to you ^_^

i feel like i had something else to say but i forgot it.

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Spoilers yeah duh

I liked alot more than just the bleacher creatures I honestly loved the first episodes it was bliss. I don't view s1 characters as the same anymore so its kinda an au in a way to me??

But man I loved the bleacher creatures they were fun and terrible and I loved them. God I wish they had shown how they got together cause oh my gosh??? THE ROLL CALL THING WAS SPECIFICALLY FOR ME OH MY GOD OH MY GODDDD. Topher looks alot happier this season I don't know before I saw him as a loser who brought people down with him. Who didn't have friends. But I don't know? They're actually really cute(and terrible mwahaha I'd hate them irl) and I wasn't expecting topher to get along with them. Just the way he looks at them and they love schemeing just as much as he does. Im just so used to topher frowning and stuff but his eyes were dilated alot this season not just for being bitten by snakes. I don't know I'm just surprised he has friends.(he obviously didn't have them before he mentions he only had limited social interactions I think they all got together during that summer or whatever?? Maybe over text??)

Theyre all terrible and I love that love the weird evil friend group. perfect parody thing of those kinds of friend groups. Snorkeling episode was my favorite I just love how they made fridas art more obscure!!!! I love that! Was worried with this episode

I love jackée holy shit more of her!! And lizzie!!and ivan! That one scene where they're so stupid is fun to me silly. And later topher wasn't even worried he was going to die he just looked happy looking at his friends after they wrre waiting to get on the submarine what the fuckkkk.

I think he likes being the leader the voting thing was probably fun for him. He's into that sort of stuff I suppose.

Okay enough about them I really enjoyed that this season was more fun than the last. At least for the most part? I enjoyed it when it let itself be wacky and I found it enjoyable. Still not the original but it's not going to be clone high reboot is its own show with lets face it completely different characters.

The only ones I didn't enjoy was 8-10 I guess didn't have too much time to watch it ill habe to rewatch again they weren't bad though.

Joan confucius Harriet should polycule sick of this shit. Its funny in a parody aspect their drama and Harriet sent her hearts! Hearts!

Joan and Confucius are cute. I hate to say I hate joanabe this season its fine if you like them I suppose I've never really liked them that much cause its a parody and abe literally thought of her like a sister before? Its a parody so I don't really care what anyone ships (edit: I realize I gotta clarify for this, not proshipping obviously I hate that shit)

Speaking of which jfk and abe qpr literally canon

okay so you already told us your other monoma pairs, but what are your other izuku pairs? im curious. (my personal fav is tododekuiida,,, they are so,, polyam,,,, i love them)

GUYS. IM SO ASHAMED TO ADMIT I HAVE NO OTHER ROMANTIC IZUKU PAIRS I LIKE. but god do I have so many platonic ones. take them as qprs or as just friendships but like UGH.

I do like izuchaco romantically theyre cute!! But i also love them as wlw mlm friendship<3

so like the main one I have is izuku, mei, shinsou, and monoma as one bigggg friendgroup/qpr because theyre just so. theyre literally bestfriends.

tododekuiida is also really really reallllyyy cute I love them but im like such a big fan of the deku squad like oh my god I'm obsessed with them.

AND CONSIDER MIDORIYA AND DENKI BECAUSE THEY ARE LITERALLY BEST FRIENDS AND HAVE ADHD.

Midoriya, tetsutetsu, kendou, monoma, setsuna friendship is something so necessary as well like. they mean the world to me.

Also aoyama and midoriya friendship because theyre just. yeah.

Hi!! I've been making my way through all of UT writing on ao3 again, and I just re read aces in the laoft-verse. It's so good!!!! I was wondering if u could tell us more about Andy and Teagan's relationship? I always love ur take on qpp's. (It can be a prompt if u want to write about it, but even some spare headcannons would be swell lol). Thanks!!!

halfway between hcs and bullet fic it is

initially they bond a lot over being aspec - andy is aroace, and teagan is asexual biromantic

and then teagan gets a crush on andy

which sucks

they feel REALLY BAD ABOUT IT because they know Andy's aro, so theyre in this really uncomfy soup of pining + guilty about being pining + angsting about how theres No Possible Way anything could work out

and then andy asks them on a date

cue bluescreen

teagan: pardon?

andy: yeah i think we're really compatible i'd like to give it a shot

teagan: pardon?

tee eventually manages to cotton on that andy is asking them if they want to be in a qpr (a term that tee, as an alloromantic, is not 100% solid on) and teagan admits that theyre romantically attracted to andy complete with a lot of self-flagellating

andy: oh thats fine

teagan: PARDON?

andy's pretty romance-neutral in the sense that he doesnt care if tees romantically attracted to him, as long as tee's sure theyre not going to be unhappy (with the relationship or him) about the fact that he's never going to reciprocate

and teagan was honestly not sure at first if they would be! and andy said that was fine, and that they could think about it, and if teagan decided they wanted to give ThemTM a shot the ball was in their court.

now teagans freaking out because how do you ask someone out in a Strictly Non-Romantic Way

they eventually decided on one of those unfoldable letter booklets that said "platonically date me bro"

andy thought it was obnoxious and loved it

they don't kiss but they do cuddle and hold hands (andy is especially prone to just like. picking teagan up like a plush and cuddling them aggressively to relieve his anxiety)

they are good for each other, but there is a bit of stutter-stopping in the beginning with teagan trying Way Too Hard to stay strictly within "the boundaries" of qpr/Non-RomanceTM without really understanding that a qpr is specifically outside of relationship boxes, not A New Box

they do eventually get married but in the "we went to the court house and filled out paperwork to be each others next of kin" kinda way

Go tired of seeing "old hedgehog" designs of sonic and shadow with them just having greyed out quills and decided to do something about it

So yeah qpr sonadow (yeah shadow is 50+ fucking finally. Im considering giving him a cane. An asthetic or an actual one idk. Maybe both?)

Sonic grew his quills out (wanted a kind of longhair rockstar kinda hair thing idk if i achiebed i though. Also still unsure on what he'd wear so i just slapped on his sa2 beach costume and added sandals (and possibly socks).

(Oh and there a scar from the Mephiles blast on his stomach- as well as top surgery scars because of course he had top surgery its sonic)

(Oh and also the "old lady swagger" sonic is just him crossdessing/going lady mode because he always rocks the look )

Shadow styled/shortend his quills and i put him in a nice black collared sweater. He wears glasses because my guy has eye problems

(Btw. Im horrible at telling ppls ages so if they dont feel old then idk what to tell you guys i have no idea what aging is at this point)

Then, instead of simply making old yaoi i ended up getting obbessed (and happy) and started making everyone old

So next up was amy and Blaze. (Silver is here too)

I think theyre a little bit on the younger side of the old yaoi? I did consider the fact that some people age differently (some look older whilst others look younger) so Amy and Silver got the more "youthful-ish" complexion whilst Blaze and Espio got the more older one.

Thoughhh im still working on their design. I can always make older old lady Amy (now that i think about it i should 100% make Amy a granny looking buff woman because i feel like thats beautiful)

Either way amy and Blaze kept their uh.. "hair" short. Amy still wears supergirly clothes and Blaze wears more masculine type clothes nothing else.

Next is espilver

You cant sue me for making Silver a short king menace to society.

Not really much on design so far other than Silver is way more plump (pearshaped) now because life got better, and Espio is taller because what is he if not a tree?

Ask them how they met? It was at bowling. Why bowling? Its because thats less weird then "was investigating the multiple crimes husbando commited and ended up getting said yet-to-be husbando arrested, but after he got out we totally fucked"

Yeah

Oh, and because i couldnt choose, Espio is trans AND intersex! Yeah!

Also Amy is silvers ex (Silver has like.. 2 exes... Possibly more?)

And then theres everyone else who arent a "ship" persay:

So i call this the moreso young adult group with Tails, Charmy, Ray and Cream.

Tails (in college) and Charmy (not in college) obviously hang out and play videogames.

Cream, because when she was little she didnt get invited to fight deadlt monsters, grew up, and decided shes going to fight deadlt monsters. So i tried to make her a cool suit but idk.. it needs reworking cause the whole "secret agent" vibe works! But not the way i like.

Rouge is forever foxynand will continue to be the most attractive woman on planet earth no matter what age. Shes also still a meance to socitey and we will forever love the jewel thief (old) woman.

Knuckles doesnt cut his quills so those shits are LONG hes also old as well but idk what he'd wear

And yes Metal (also Chaos) is here too. Metal is a bit rusty (literally) but overall well kept and fancy. I think eggman would be dead by now, so i gave it a crown on its ears to symbolize how it took over i guess.

OKAY SHIPKIDS:

Blaze x Amy ( bio kid): Flare (was thinking "Spark" because of the love idea but idk yet)

Espio x Silver (bio-kid): Greybell

And then heres the fun part:

So Sonic and Shadow dont function like the others here, in that- while saving the world and whatnot, every so often they'd either find a kid following them (similarly to Amy and Tails back in the days) or save a kid during their whole adventure.

The first time this happened was just Luca (a black jaguar) who followed Sonic during one his little solo adventures and Sonic was like "do you have parents i can take u back too" and she was like "nah" so of course, after seriously looking for her parents through ppl with database accesses like tails and rouge, he was like "u wanna stay with me?" And Luca was like "YEAH!"

And then Sonic called Shadow like "Shadow do u want kids" and which he replied "what?" And then suddenly they adopted Luca. This is how it began.

Eventually, as one grew up, theyd find another, and then another and then well now they have like 11 kids in total.

Now, after ALL of this, they took a break and after that years worth of a break were like "wanna make a kid? Like for the challenge of having to that from scratch"

And sonic was like "what?"

So they hit up the labs and made a bio kid who is 2 months old and is the most hectic fucking thing theyve ever had to deal with so thanks for the prior 10 experinces (alas they do not compare to the mega menace)

what submissions have the most convincing propaganda: rather for being silly or being serious

hi anon. mod zazie here. i read through every single one of the submissions to answer this because i am insane. and the results are as follows ^-^

techno & phil fans are INSANE over "for you phil, the world!!" as they should be!! i, too, read bunfloras' phil & techno fics. but even if i didnt already know who emeraldduo was, you all have VERY GOOD propaganda. Immortal lifelong best friends... <3

dsmp fans i love you im holding out my hand to you in a gesture of friendship. hello. both mods are also mcyt fans and dsmp fans. we know abt characters vs ccs. we also despise cc!dream. you are safe here. im sorry that previous polls have traumatized you :((

c!tubbo/c!ranboo fans also fucking turned out you have VERY convincing propaganda

ive never read the locked tomb, know nothing of the characters, but to the submitters who sent in Camilla Hect and Palamedes Sextus youve convinced me. VERY good job. where can i find your media i need to learn more. no like fr

jrwi fans are you okay. good lord /pos. also youll be pleased to know WE HAVE NOT ONE BUT TWO SUBMISSIONS OF THE GREATER MANA POLYCULE

to the etho/skizz fan who submitted an essay. hi. i think youre so right for putting them in a httyd au. very convincing propaganda. also are you okay.

hi silmarillion fans. do you need hot cocoa.

jrwi fans are literally so not normal about their guys. sorry to call you out but oh my god not a single one of you is normal /pos. its great.

not a fnaf fan but "Theyre also both canonically queer, if that helps. That has nothing to do with the lobotomies or the dying and being revived as a soulless walking corpse, though." is the sentence of all time. i hope whoever wrote that is doing well.

good evening to the homestuck fan who wrote jake & dirk propaganda so convincing that for a moment i wanted to go check out their media only to remember its Homestuck and ONLY to the homestuck fan who wrote jake & dirk propaganda so convincing that for a moment i wanted to go check out their media only to remember its Homestuck.

we've been over the jesus christ/mary magdalene submission but did you know apparently there's actual evidence to back it up? lots of it in fact? i did not expect to read that tonight (for future reference slash in case you're curious i am an atheist & cycad is christian)

the little women fan has some SERIOUS propaganda. my respect o7

hello to the autistic sp (south park) fan who wrote a genuine essay on kenny mccormick and eric cartman. wish you well (and like, we got a voltron submission as well. i dont know either of those shows/fandoms at all besides vague knowledge that they're not great but eh we're here to have fun. who cares (this is in response to you mentioning you didnt know if sp was allowed (i dont know actually youd have to ask cycad but im like 95% sure its fine (can you tell i have adhd))))

GIGOLAS FAN SPOTTED. they didnt write a lot of propaganda but HELL YEAH WE GOT SOME LOTR FANS HERE. theyre so qpr to me you dont even KNOW

i didnt even think about link/zelda being a qpr before this but you have convinced me. youre so right. they Are

besties who drink poison together STAY together!!! (merlin and arthur). fuck yeah baby!!! i have never seen merlin bbc

oh moirails are a homestuck thing i saw those in our asks and was unsure what they were

CANON QPR IN FABLE SMP? oh i need to check that out. fable smp fans ik this is a long shot but if anyone wants to give me reccomendations for where to start watching.

hiya qsmp fans. no need to worry you have turned out in both numbers AND propaganda. wowzers.

we have One submission for q!quackbur but now im wondering why no one has submitted c!quackbur. theyre literally homoeretic business rivals whose relationship could be viewed as platonic or romantic. smh

Roman and Youngblood from Roleslaying with Roman have very dedicated fans.

divorce quartet the divorced qp polycule ever but also im very biased. (both scott/cleo and scott/martyn were submitted multiple times)

we have some very fun ocs & real life qp relationships and im so here for it.

oh hey lifesteal smp i know those guys. wow damn theyre kinda fucked up arent they.

POLYARCHIVES SUPREMACY <3 BASEDBASEDBASED

POLYMECHS SUPREMACY ALSO SO BASED

Hi. Person who submitted both jesus/mary magdalene and now hamlet/ophelia. I love you. You are here to cause CHAOS and i for one applaud you for it. Can we kiss /j

hey hey! just wondering if you had any other cool ship headcanons (or qpr headcanons oooo so fun (i myself am aroace so i find it fascinating) that you wanted to talk about (poly/qpr 156 enjoyer anon here! I loved your extra talking about it, twas glorious!) I just like hearing your thoughts!! They are most intriguing to me! Have a great day!

Hello!!! God, pleased you like my silly little rambles, especially about The Worst Polycule Ever (Affectionate).

When it comes to shipping i usually see Thomas as mega aro so i don't usually ship him. But him and James is too funny (and theu have the long standing dynamic godbless).

I think that Thomas/Bertie is aro4aro. They are a qpr and their love language is competition. People assume their constant challenges to each other is like, >:/ flavoured but in reality it's 🥰 flavoured.

I had once said a couple years ago and then rediscovered recently an ask about Duck i had answered where I had alluded to Duck/Percy qpr in the tags and i think i'm so right for that. They are hardworking4hardworking, green4green, takenoshit4takenoshit. Percy saw him be brought into the yard and went thank god a normal person and Duck saw him and went you're the only bitch here I respect. Guess I'll imprint on you.

Percy/James is peak qpr as well. I can't articulate my thoughts on it much better than hou've already seen but like they just hang out man

And like. I've really tried to get into Thomas/Percy as romantic but Thomas is too aro in my brain. Thomas may have been Percy's first crush but it was never reciprocated ans then he discovered himself n his identity more. They're qpps to me. Arospec4arospec. Percy started talking about how weird Romance was and Thomas went ugh yeah fr also hey you know there's a word for that and Percy went ☆.☆ Oh. (Tm)

So if Thomas/James does happen (and that Is romantic to me) thomas Would tell James to ask Percy first lmao. And theyre messy and codependent like that.

i know this is my art blog but i can do whatever i want. agents posting GO (WARNING THIS IS MESSY)

agent 3: lake. 19 (11 in splatoon 1), they/them

i dont have a lot on lake!!! they actually didnt get recruited at all, they just kinda... stumbled into the battlefield while the octavio fight was happening and insisted on sticking around afterwards because they had Way Too Much Energy. they dont really know a lot about their past before that, even less after oe. they now spend a lot of time researching turf game strategies (theyre not legally allowed to play because their special limiter is broken) and trying to push through the chronic fatigue. oh, and theyre in a qpr with 8.

personality . uhh basically lake likes to pretend theyre still silly but its Not working. they cant really speak above a certain volume either without it hurting. im so bad at describing personalities heeellllp hellllp help meeee helllllp

agent 4: mari(elle). 21 (15 in splatoon 2), any

the child of two splatlandian grizzco higher-ups! like... they work with the bear himself! they worked under the company at the inkopolis location for a while, including while the whole callie disappearing fiasco was happening, at least until the company got big enough where he could quit and her parents wouldnt notice. they didnt. cool! there may or may not be a reason that they didnt (wink) but i havent decided yet.

mari is kinda uhhhm. well. ive described it as theyre working on being silly without being mean. and hes been getting better :] + toni kensa fan oh heeeeelllllll no

agent 8: august/kass. 19 (13 in oe), he/him

oh god yeah i dont have a lot on him either. basically baby kass and baby lake met a few weeks before the Oe Incident and became fast friends. but then the metro happened and uhhhyeah you can imagine what happened to that. they both know they were close but dont really uh. actually i explained this better in another thing let me grab that.

"the key difference between a normal playthrough and this is that, not only did he run into agent 3 a few times in the metro, he… lost an eye when they were sanitized. the same eye, in fact. plus, his memories weren't entirely… restored, like how it i assume its implied to in oe. the contents of the mem cakes were merely evidence that there was a life before this, something to evoke feelings, and something to keep him going. that isn't his life anymore."

anyway. oe happens and now were here. present day kass is SILLY okay? but in the way that like. he dunks bread in pepsi and stares at mari (roommate) with the most blank face imaginable when they look at him weird. i dont know where im going with this hes just weird. he also has a strange fixation on death as a coping mechanism for the fact that his first memories are pretty much of zombies but hes respectful about it dw

new 3: clementine "kit"/patch. 16, it/its

basically it was forced to take on an unhealthy amount of schoolwork (+ a few extra years of school) because its parents live all the way in calamari county and didnt want it doing stupid shit. its primary guardian is its older sister, whos a lot nicer about this stuff yay! but yeah uhh splatoon 3 basically happens because it wanted to escape that. why it actually went in the manhole is up to interpretation .

through the nss bonanza business it made a friend, my friends oc ball :] together they are agent 6 and agent 9 (dubbed by lake because they knew itd get confusing) and theyre Siblings Yaaay. its smallfry friend (agent 3) is dubbed sen, short for baby sensory video, at least while kits learning their language. it doesnt know a lot about sen but is in the process of learning!!

its generally very quiet and soft-spoken to most people because of how it grew up, but in more of the ^_^ way ig??? despite that its also known to not have a sense of self preservation, again because of how it grew up. it goes out in the scorching hot desert for random junk. it ended up with severe facial scarring because it dove into danger so much in alterna. im describing this very badly im so sorry.

whatre your opinions on all the jake ships. ALL OF THEM.

hi gaz :3 under the cut bc its literally fivemillion miles long.

rosejake - ??/10 theres something there. i can see it in my minds eye. its not romantic probably(??) but i feel like they would be so insane unhinged abt each other in a really hard to describe way. this is largely bc i like smashing my faves together and having them be weird abt each other.

davejake - 8/10 hehe. i like them :3 theyre very funny & silly. i feel like neither of them have ever introspected in their entire lives w/out repressing it immediately afterwards & together they get Worse. this eventually culminates in them both having Realizations and transitioning. i think they can holding hands on purpose.

jakeroxy - 8/10 theyre so unlabeled confusing but DEEPLY intimate relationship to me. they are baring their souls to each other in a hobby lobby parking lot ^-^ theyre very important to me

dirkjake - ??/10 clutches head oh theyre oddly compelling to me actually. i think they work best as weird ex's who have sort of something going on but they dont really work in a 'proper' relationship so its awkward & confusing for everyone around them. my feelings r mixed overall though.

jakehal - 10/10 imagine the worst pitch dynamic you possibly can. now make it worse. i have several vague aus in my mind palace about them being terrible & codependent. but in actuality i think their dynamic is very interesting from a character analysis standpoint & thats a very easy way to make me ship a set of characters. also i think its funny. and jake deserves a robotboyfriend.

jakedavesprite - 5/10 ive actually thought abt this one before surprisingly but there wasnt really a lot going on with them. definitely potential though!!!

jakejasprose - 9/10 futch dyke 4 bisexual aroace and its up to you whos which. i think theyre the weirdest palerom dynamic on the earth but genuinely they are so bffs to me. bffs that kiss a little (a lot) thats jasproses emotional support [vile slur omitted]! & jakes emotional support kittycatgirl :3

davepetajake(??) - 8/10 gripping the sides of my chair. yeah im normal about these characters who i dont think have any speaking line 1on1 interactions. so normal. why do u ask? anyways yeah i think theyre kind of supersilly awesome & fun. and also *gestures vaguely * the psychological trauma is vast and fascinating 2 my fucked up mind.

jakerisolsprite - 10/10 ok now hear me out. this was one of my first ever jakeships actually i just think the "jake/a guy who hates his guts" dynamic is supremely underrated & funny as fuck. they r like weird & messed up usually pitch vacillation nightmare girlfriends. genuinely very attached to them in a personal way.

jakearquius - ??/10 well. looks down at myself. looks back up. theyre funny? surprisingly i dont actually think abt them often.

arajake - 10/10 imagine a world so full of joy and peace. ok but fr their characters are like. intertwined in my mind. their relationship is like almost romantic...? theyre aro4aro. but very much in an 'official' relationship as well. if they knew or cared what it was they would be in a qpr but they dont. i think spending time w aradia would help jake figure out more abt himself & i think aradia would just really like spending time with him. they are marveling at each others minds.

jaketav - 3/10 unfortunately i go out of my way to not think too hard abt tavros so im gonna have to leave this one alone. in a hypothetical world they could be bffs forever!

jakesol - 10/10 deep breath. ok so actually im very very attached to the idea of pale jakesol. it shows up in my casual idle daydreams & in every au i think abt too hard. i think they can taking a nap together. i want them to sillyargue about random bullshit & infodump at each other about things the other could not give less of a shit about. clingy sleepynaptime girlfriends. neither of them has showered in weeks. also theyre so totally each others type. like look at canon for a moment and consider it.

jakekat - 7/10 idk. i think theyre sillies. they bond over cinema in the arguing way. i think jake would like to mess with him until it becomes clear that karkat doesnt actually hate everything and is just kind of Like That. i can see them being good friends and... maybe?? boygirlfriends.

jakenep - 8/10 i think she can hunting him for sport. like for actual sport they go play high stakes tag in forests for several months and come out soulbonded. also jake needs more sillycatgirls in his life & nepeta needs more chill/fun ppl to hang out with. shes being sillySTIFLED.

jakekan - 5/10 honestly i can not say ive ever though about- wait no no i thought about it once like forever ago. honestly they could be pretty good green autism besties!! idk abt romance but thats mostly bc ive just never considered it.

jakerezi - ??/10 this one is absurdly funny to me. i dont think it would ever happen but if it did it would be really really funny.

jakevris - 7/10 actually ive read several fics abt this before! it kind of appeals to me in a weird way but i prefer them as weird frenemies.

jakequius - 8/10 lays down. look. ok. so. well. i just think theres potential ok? i cant explain it. im running out of steam for this if you cant tell.

gamjake - 0/10 no thanks ?

erijake - 5/10 i dont think ive seriously thought about it but theres definitely some potential there.

thats all im doing. god bless u all.

ugh so I have a squish on one of my besties and I really want her to be my qpp but I don’t wanna ask because 1) were 13/14 and that seems way to young 2) I brought it up the other day at lunch at school I was like ‘I rlly want a qpr’ and then her and my other bestie were like wat? And then I tried to explain it the bestie 2 let’s call her Christmas (I have my reasons) was like ‘oh well u have (friend - let’s call her summer) isn’t she like bi or smthn right?’ And then I’m like ‘well yeah she is but that’s not what it means’ and then I couldn’t be bothered explaining so squish (book) looked it up (naughty naughty we’re not meant to have our phones with us at school) and then I was like ‘and it dosent have to b 2 queer people atleast I don’t think’ and then Christmas was like ‘well u have us right?’ (THEYRE both allocishet tho honestly book seems sorta queer to me I can’t tell how tho’ And I’m like yeah but that’s not what it means anyway all this is beside the point anyways ag some point it came up abt like them and book was like ‘yea but that’s weird’ so that’s saaaaddd coz idk I rlly love her a lot like I don’t love her /more/ then Christmas I just love her different and yeah idk I just rlly want her to b my qpp and I feel like eventually my friends are all gonna get romantic partners and then I’ll never ever be anyones top priority coz I’m aroace ugh

im ill and incapable of real genuine human thought so im just going to talk about one of my favourite drafts that im working on and its this

-regulus & evan fake dating, ft aromantic regulus, endgame rosewater qpp AND endgame rosekiller.

-yeah im hitting evan with the polyamory beam. ITS CALLED PROJECTING!!

anyway its one of my favourite things in my google docs. some fun facts about it:

•barty & evan BOTH already like each other. evan also knows barty likes him back but thinks hes too much of a coward to say anything and his first thought is “okay, i’ll fake date somebody about this”

•oh and also regulus is just like “i mean alright i guess”

•regulus tells barty immediately. hes like “honest to god get your shit together” and barty is like “literally why would you do this” and regulus is like “i thought it would be funny”:

•you guys are all ALWAYS forgetting that if sirius pretty much raised regulus HES GOING TO ACT LIKE A TWAT SOMETIMES i love regulus being an absolute menace

•qpr. thats all i need to say. as a member of a qpr it is one of my all time favourite relationships in my life and i think not enough people write them. i ALSO think not enough people write aro characters as capable of emotion!! 90% of the time (in my experience!!) theyre just aro because the author couldnt think of a pairing for them and they felt bad. so anyway i changed that for this fic. and also in like… 3 other fics in my drafts. i love being in a qpr im in a qpr hey did i mention im in a qpr this post goes out to my beloved partner even though they will never see it

•sirius. sirius. sirius. i dont know WHAT it is about the black brothers but every single time i write ANY fic with either of them in they end up talking to each other. i cant stop them. im just writing and they say “we want to reconcile” and i say “that wasnt one of my plot points…?” but its too late! theyre already talking!

•regulus being SUPREMELY confused when he realises he likes evan <3 with the focus on the fact that he can still like him without it being romantic!! he has no idea what a qpr is but he’ll get there

•regulus GOES TO SIRIUS FOR HELP!! and sirius is like “ok i will help you” and regulus is like “what why” and sirius is like “do you want help or not tbh”

•but also regulus is like “ok so i have a fake boyfriend” and sirius is like “you fucking what”:

•the segment with sirius features a LOT of complaints from regulus (that part is his pov! it changes throughout between barty, reg & evan though) about the red of the gryffindor dorms. he is so upset by them:

•barty immediately notices when regulus accidentally catches feelings. hes like “…you thought this would be funny but it went like normal fake dating didnt it” and regulus gives him a very sad looking nod and says “i wont stop you dating him i still dont know what it is” and barty is like “getting over evan is too much work and id know, if he wants us both he can bloody well just have us both”

•spoiler alert for the fact that he does <3

-anyway. not much of this is written but i just wanted to talk about it! my dear best friend and the platonic loml is anti reg/evan (she could never get me) so… tumblr has to hear about it instead!

-oh also my fake dating experience is based in a little too much truth about my life (i did it) (its how i got with my partner) so! you know. you can trust the authenticity?

-thats all. i needed to get this out of my SYSTEM but it might end up on ao3 <3 anyways if youre a rosewater-er my ao3 is SUCH a safe place for you. my marauders pseud is hellenistic & my main is apartfromheartburn (but dont go there because its all anime fics i wrote 3 years ago) so my marauders fics can as such be found under hellenistic (apartfromheartburn). id link them but also i have a headache that will kill me if i stare at my phone acreen any longer so! thats not happening. end of this post! bye bye <3

What are your favorite things abt c!phil? i want to know his character better :3

OH ANON I WOULD BE DELIGHTED TO ANSWER THIS

god where to START hmmmmmm

okay ive stuck it under a read more because my god is there a lot. for anyone curious, i list off 10 of my favourite things about cphil (with explanations as to what an why), 10 of my favourite quotes, and also cover some more common fandom mischaracterisations

1 - his character design it's basic, but i need somewhere to start. i LOVE phils character design, idk, maybe its just something to do with birds and green and me being a cosplayer. especially his new skin! it has details, anon, and they all have meaning. i love me some details with meaning. and bc its minecraft, and because minecraft is pixels, theres SO MUCH ROOM FOR INTERPRETATION. anyone can go COMPLETELY ham with the design if they want to and they all look SO COOL.

2 - EMERALD DUO okay so ill say it outright; im a qpr emduo sorta person. at the very least im an ‘old friends/war buddies/ex emperors emduo’ person. dont get me wrong, techno is the eldest child, but in the dsmp, he’s not phil’s kid, they’re just really old friends. AND OH MY GOD I LOVE THEM. ‘for you the world’ NEED I SAY MORE??? the emeralds, the phil risking his life to protect techno from the butcher army, the techno worrying about phil participating in doomsday, the complete and utter undying trust they have in each other. theyre not perfect, they still disagree and still have differing opinions but they sort it out and compromise and make sure each other is always okay!!! them!!!

3 - birb cphil is a bird we all know this. and this is leaning more into fanon not explicitly canon, but im including it because i can. phil is bird, he has bird brain. bird instincts and bird features, like hollow bones, chirping, nesting, preening, all the good stuff. it adds a layer of depth to his character thats so fun to play with when writing!! there’s so much potential for both angst and fluff and i love it so much. also i just love birds so yknow. win win situation for me.

4 - family, its messy phil is part of what i believe is the biggest canonical family on the dsmp. there’s four generations ffs. he has a son, a grandson, even a great-grandson. and it’s not perfect. wilbur is. wilbur, but even though he went mad and even though he lied in his letters he still cared enough to send letters in the first place, phil still cared enough to read them. phil still cared enough to drop everything for his son. it was messy and it was heartbreaking but that is what it is to be a father, i think. sometimes whats right is whats hardest and its phils love for wilbur that was forever just so clear. its the way fundy fucked up, its the way phil fucked up in return, its the way they made up without properly making up but phil was always, always there for fundy, always cared for him at least a little, because that’s his grandson.

5 - leading on from the above, kristin!! ANON DO YOU KNOW HOW COOL IT IS FOR PHIL TO BE MARRIED TO THE LITERAL GODDESS OF DEATH?? phil is a trophy husband and you cannot convince me otherwise. his wife is SO COOL and SO POWERFUL and he loves her SO VERY MUCH. yeah sure hes a het guy in a homonormative society but i can forgive him for that because his wife is amazing. also less cphil, more ccphil, but i think its SO FUCKING COOL AND/OR FUNNY that ccphil literally just. wrote his wife into the dsmp on a whim. THATS how much he loves her that even tho shes not involved in this thing hes doing she’s still there in some sense.

6 - immortality yeah cphil CAN die, but here’s the catch; he doesn’t. hes functionally immortal and godddd i love it so much. hes so fucked up from it, but i love that about him (more on that point later). cphil has lived through so much and he has known so much and he has gained and lost SO MUCH but he’s still going strong, hes still loving and living and trying. who knows when he’ll finally die, not him and certainly not us.

7 - WOO TRAUMA mans is SO FUCKED UP. god where to even START with this. phil has not processed a single emotion in 500 years and he does NOT plan on starting now thank you very much. his sons death? nah lets build a country instead. watching his best friend be executed? nope not processing THAT lets find somewhere else to live oh yeah also i almost died. phils favourite thing is avoiding emotions and busying himself with some Other Task for Someone Else (new lmanburg, training room, various farms for techno, just to name a couple) so he Doesnt Have To Think About Anything. also perception of time? hell no he’s gonna be working for days without realising it. this is not healthy. he does not intend to stop. he blames himself for so much and rarely ever accepts help from anyone at all.

8 - kindness dont get me wrong if you get on the wrong side of phil you will find out exactly why some know him as the angel of death, but if ur not on that side of him, hes just. so kind and so caring. that one time when ranboo was deliberately trying to trigger the enderwalk out, and phil ran in and got rid of all the splash water bottles because he thought ranboo was getting hurt? yeah. that. protecting tommy without hesitation or question when dream was chasing him? yeah. that. building new lmanburg because tubbo had enough on his plate and he needed something to do anything to do he needed to keep his hands busy then it would be okay it had to be okay he had to be okay? yeah. that. visiting techno even while he was under house arrest to make sure he was okay? yeah. that.

9 - hes such a chaotic little fuck this is something a LOT of the fandom seem to. ignore. phil is not this sophisticated, calm, rational father figure. he can be sometimes (at a push) but thats not who he is. he’s an absolute chaos machine, and a fucking deadly one at that. he’s bored and you’re in the general vicinity? bye living! i think its well summed up in that one clip of phil and techno in a village, and techno’s grabbing a couple supplies here and there, and phil is just fucking gutting the place even if he doesnt actually need those supplies. he will murder (for fun), he will explode shit (for fun), he will cause mass genocide (for fun), he will fucking. idk he’ll do it all for fun.

10 - history imo, phil and techno are some of the best—if not the most—fleshed out characters in the dsmp. part of this, i reckon, is because of the history they have. you cannot talk about dsmp cphil properly without acknowledging smp earth and hardcore at the very least. the antarctic empire is there, phil and techno carry its shields and wear its colours. the angel of death is familiar to most if not all, the love for fucking freezing temperatures is there too. phil did decanonise the connection to hardcore, but a) many people who care ignore that, b) i ignore that, and c) it was there for at least a little, it had influence for at least a little. cphil is and old character, he didn’t just blip into existence in the dsmp, he has real, solid, pre-established history.

---

and now for some of my favourite cphil quotes!!

1 - Things, buildings, they can be replaced! People can't be replaced. I'm not losing anyone else... I'm not losing anyone else. Not to this bullshit. 

2 - (“Since when was this a Philza Minecraft thing?”) “Since I was forced to kill my own son, you idiot!”

3 - look i made this entire section to include One Specific Quote except i now cannot find that quote. fuck this fuck me. it was something phil said in chat at one point, he was talking to sam, saying how he [phil] was immortal, he had seen nations rise and fall, he had seen people like sam who craved power come and go with little consequence. its a good quote, trust me, ill put it here when/if i can find it.

4 - "I've seen this 'government', on this server... Everything to do with government has just been bad so far. (...) I've watched it completely destroy and tear down people's wills, and change people... I've seen it change the nicest people into complete and utter tyrants. So I think it's about time.”

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okay quotes over now for some common fandom mischaracterisations, since u said u wanted to know cphils character better

1 - bad dad phil this one really gets me. i hate it, genuinely. phil was never and is not a bad dad. im not saying he was perfect, but he was not a bad dad. it is not his fault wilbur went mad, it is not his fault tommy was hurt so much in exile (more on that later), none of this is his fault. phil cares so much about his family and does everything he can for them, he was never neglectful or absent or anything of the sort.

2 - sbi family dynamics THESE HAVE BEEN DECANONISED BY LIKE EVERYONE IN SBI FOR THE DSMP. MULTIPLE TIMES. tommy was never phils son, he was just some kid phils actual son knew. techno is phils old friend, not his son. wilbur, however, is his son

3 - calm collected eloquent father SOMETIMES phil can have good fatherly advice. other times he really fucking does not!! cphil is shit with words, if you want someone whos always expressing their emotion in elegant prose, look at techno, not phil. he tries, he really does, but his perception of normality is warped, and sometimes he just doesnt fucking care?? hes chaotic and fairly independent, and yeah okay he may have taken in TWO stray kids (tubbo, when he was a child, and ranboo after doomsday) but hes not the like. serial adopter some people make him out to be

---

so yeah, thats cphil for you! im more than happy to go into more detail about any of the above things, just ask! that goes for literally anyone btw. ill happily talk about fanon and more fandom characterisations, but ive tried to keep it as close to canon as i can so far. what’s great is that despite what he claims, ccphil is an excellent roleplayer and general storyteller, hes always adding little details and explaining reasoning behind things, so theres so much nuance and so much depth to cphil and the section of the world he inhabits. can you tell that cphil is my favourite character perhaps.

am i a girl? am i a boy? do i really care?

haha find the title in the fic the reward is feeling good abt it /j happy pride month!! kickin it off with QPR ravioli ft. legend figuring theirself out 

relationships: legend & ravio (theyre married, but its entirely platonic)

ao3 link; x

Legend is always coming and going.

They barely get time at home, with their friends and family. But they’re here now. Home, with Ravio. Sure, it’s only been a few days.. But, unfortunately, it’s the longest Legend has ever been here. Maybe it’ll last longer? Legend wasn’t alone, of course they weren’t, they had their friends—or are they family?—with them. Life is good for now…which is, in their experience, never a good thing. “You’re worrying again.” Legend jumped slightly, glancing over their shoulder to see Ravio settling down behind them. “Don’t sneak up on me like that, Rav. You’re lucky I don’t have a weapon.” “You do have a weapon.”Ravio mumbled, leaning over and attempting to kiss Legend’s cheek, only managing to land the kiss on their jaw instead. Legend doesn’t know why he does that, it’s always been a thing. “You keep a knife in your right boot all the time.” “Damn, gonna have to hide it somewhere else now ya know.”Legend mumbled, cracking a grin when Ravio snorted loudly. “Your family is having a very interesting conversation inside.” “Yeah?”Legend shifted, leaning their back against Ravio’s chest as the other wrapped his arms around them. “Mhm. They’re talking about gender and sexual identities.”Ravio whistled. Legend fell quiet, eyes glued to the sky. “Glad I skipped out on that one.” Ravio hummed, silently asking why. Legend doesn’t know. Well—they do. But they don’t know their sexuality, and is there even a term for their gender? They don’t have one set of pronouns—they use four sets; he/him, she/her, they/them, and bee/bees—but what does that fall under? Legend doesn’t know. “You’re my best friend, right? Besides Four.” Ravio giggled faintly. “Besides Four, yep!” “And I can tell you anything?” “Anything you’re comfortable sharing, Mr. Hero. I won’t push.” Legend shifted until their head was resting on Ravio’s chest, pink and gold eyes staring up into green. Ravio’s not wearing his hood today—maybe he forgot it. “I don’t know what I am. Or if I even have a label…or if I even want one.” “Oh.”Ravio hummed, playing with Legend’s hair. “Well, you don’t need a label if you don’t want to. I don’t use labels, not really. I can try and help you figure it out, if you want?” “Really?” “Of course, Mr. Hero! We’re platonic life partners, after all.” “...okay.” “Okay?” “Okay.” “So…you know what pronouns are. What’re yours?” “Um…I use more than one.” “What are they?”Ravio hummed, waiting patiently. “Um. He/Him, She/Her, They/Them…and um…”Legend trailed off. People have made fun of them for the last set before. Ravio wouldn’t do that, he’s so understanding…but…still. “Take your time.”Ravio smiled a gentle smile, running his fingers through the hero’s hair. Ravio said before that Legend’s hair is as soft as a rabbit’s fur—though, he didn’t understand why Legend finds that absolutely hilarious. “Bee/Bees. I know, they’re not…normal…but I like them and—” “You don’t have to explain. I think they suit you, honeybee.” “...you don’t think they’re weird?” “Who am I to judge? Your pronouns are yours. Anything can be made into a pronoun if you’re not a coward.” Legend snorted, covering their mouth to muffle the laughter that cracked out. Of course Ravio is the one saying something like that. “I don’t think I know yours, bunny.” “My pronouns?”Ravio tilted his head, smiling when the other nodded. “Well, I use He/Him and Bun/Buns pronouns. But I don’t really care how people refer to me. It’s whatever, y’know?” Legend nodded quietly. “Okay, do you know your sexuality? Or, well—do you have an interest in romance, and towards whom if you do?” “Ah, now the difficult one. Um. I’ve admittedly only fallen in love once, with a girl. But—But I’m attracted to men too? I dunno..” “That’s okay. You don’t always figure this out quickly. It takes time.” “I wish it didn’t.”Legend mumbled with a gentle frown. “I wish—I wish I could just. Know who I am. But I don’t! I mean—Am I a girl? Am I a boy? Do I really care?” Ravio let out a soft sigh, resting his head on Legend’s own with a small smile. “We all wish we could wake up one day and know who we are, what we’re s’posed to do…but…it’s not as easy as we wish.” Legend let out a heavy breath, nodding. “Yeah..I know. I just—it’s been years, and I’m…tired, bunny. I’m sick of not knowing.” “And that’s okay, honeybee.”Ravio assured, kissing the tip—or, well, lack thereof, this was Legend’s left ear which has the tip missing—of the other’s ear. “It’s okay to get tired of not knowing yourself. I get it, I do. But you’ll get there, I know you will—I’ll even help you every step of the way if you’d like me to.” Legend sighed softly, seeming to melt further into the Lorulean. “Lolia, what would I do without you?” “Curl up in a ball and die, probably.”Ravio stated bluntly, bursting into laughter when Legend let out a very loud snort. “I wouldn’t do that.” “Mm, you would. You get injured a lot, honeybee.” “....true.”Legend sighed. “I think I know the term for my sexuality.” “Yeah?” “I think I’m bisexual. Four—Four once explained it to me, talking about..”Legend paused for a second. “Himself. I think it fits me too?” “And…gender identity? Still a mystery?” “Still a mystery, unfortunately.” “Well, we’ve got plenty of time.”Ravio smiled. “...you think you can get offa me now? My legs are dead.” “Mmh…no.”Legend grinned, watching as Ravio playfully rolled his eyes. Legend doesn’t like help, but.. Gently, they held Ravio’s hand and laced their fingers together. “Help me figure myself out?” A grin from the merchant, who placed a kiss on the hero’s nose.

“Of course.”

thinks about owen in ruina.... lastest reblog inspired me :3

thinks about the final battle. its like "oh power of friendship! dont you have everyone on your side?" and he doesnt. his issues are finally catching up to him - he's disconnected from his friends. after l corp (considering this version of things: owen learns about the loops of day 45, not 50, and finally breaks on d50. he tells himself he couldve changed things if he hadnt.) he's closed himself off more - yeah, he has his friends, but... they dont know him. he doesnt know them anyone. they've looked so far into eachother and their minds that they havent seen the bigger picture enough.

so in the final battle, owen vs vera alone, he cant go on. this was all he wanted, to save her (and everyone else ofc). to make up the debt he's been carrying for so long, watching those around him slowly break from the pressure over l corps story, never trying to help. this is his chance. he can fix everything here. he can save vera here.

and he does try. he wills himself onward - 5 more minutes of holding yourself together. 5 more minutes of watching all of your mistakes fly by you. is this emotion, this sadness from her sincere? or is this just a trap? but hey, what about his own? is this just matrying, just insincere guilt?

were any of these connections, these feelings, repairable in the first place, or have we all been faking it? in the end, thoughts like these, that have piled up for so long, are the hands that drag him into her embrace. vera, the voice of distortion's. maybe saving isn't what we needed. maybe i did want to live in your fantasy. maybe i'd be happy then--

but vera cant do it, either. neither of them can survive this. she can't bear to do this, not after her fantasy has been broken, even so slightly. even through this sole crack, she can see, and she cant go on like that. meanwhile, the other half of her, has finally received what she wanted. acceptance. someone, anyone, to reach their hand our to her, not the other way around, like it always has been.

she has been shunned by the world all her life. her family, her friends, everything around her. and finally, she is being listened to, heard out sincerely, this one. they both accept eachother without judgement.

they both break at the same time, then and now. on d50, and in the final battle.... they're so connected.

thinks about owen and vera. also thinks about straight relationships written by gay people (the fucking understanding and unspoken bond between them is fucking crazy. and theyre not even confirmed canon relationship theyre like. in the middle. theyre like friends with some romance yeah but theyre still friends in the end. qpr swag?)