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#oh my lord (Vader)
go-see-a-starwar · 3 months
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Christensen opened up on his time in the galaxy far, far away. “It’s been a remarkable experience. And just a very heartwarming one,” he tells Empire. “The journey that I’ve been on with Star Wars over the last 20 plus years... it’s been a wild ride, and where we’re at now is really meaningful to me.” While the backlash against the prequels was difficult to take, he’s pleased to see how beloved all three films are today. “I think that those movies have held up well over time,” he says. “It feels like vindication for the work that we did. Everyone that worked on those movies thought that we were part of something special. We all wanted to do our very best work, and we cared a lot about it. And so to see the response from the fans now, it’s very cool.” That response includes excitement from younger fans – who are always thrilled to meet the man who… well, murdered all the Jedi younglings in Revenge Of The Sith. “There was a lot of talk about us doing that scene, and I love that George did it. It was a bold move. And it’s shocking,” the actor says. “Kids seem to forget about that scene when they meet me! There’s not any fear or intimidation. They’re just excited to meet Anakin.” Having ridden out the stormy reception to the prequels – and returned to the Star Wars galaxy in recent years for appearances in Obi-Wan Kenobi and Ahsoka – Christensen reflected on the advice that he would give to his younger self before stepping into Attack Of The Clones. “Even though I was a bit overwhelmed, I was also a confident young man, and I wanted to make my mark. But I guess if I were to have some advice for me during that general time in my life, it would be: ‘Patience’,” he decides. “Because my journey with the character and with Star Wars has at times been a bumpy one... but I’m in a good place with it now. And so that’s why I say patience.” In 2024, there’s undoubtedly balance to the Force.
Excerpt of Hayden Christensen’s interview with Empire Magazine for its Prequels’ 25th Anniversary special issue
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levitatingbiscuits · 2 years
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very little is funnier to me than anakin having absolutely no clue that cody hates him, but one thing that scores higher is cody continuing to hate vader for extremely petty reasons after order 66
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techniiciian · 7 months
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📏 we've compared heights a thousand times but gimme the visual anyway. gimme vader + ani, matt, and han sandwiching luke (with love)
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matt vc: we could be standing in order from tallest to shortest if SOME members of this family wouldn't bicker. looking at you gramps & dad! at least papa is the cutest we all gotta protect him, even though he could wipe the floor with all of us. . .
@skysaunter & @stillsolo
thank you for indulging me in my antics. i will never get over how tall everyone but luke is. i guess the tall gene really did skip a generation.
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lucy-ghoul · 2 years
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....... Just realized that I'm very close to Vader's age in the Obi-Wan series (~32; I'm turning 28 in three months) and. tbh Idk what to do with this info now
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monyacchiinno · 8 months
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Yeah, turns out up until this very moment i hadn't posted this first attempt of drawing darth vader in my style. Suprisingly, it's pretty good considering the art clash here lmao--
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jkl-fff · 3 months
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Emperor Palpatine: Lord Vader, would you care to explain why you requested official, imperial reimbursement for a set of--and I quote--"Baby's Basic Shapes Refrigerator Magnets"?
Darth Vader: I have noticed, my master, that our troops have a difficult time inferring my mood because of my helmet. And I also discovered that my whole suit is slightly magnetized. So I got this idea, and ... Well, check this out, my master!
*turns his back for a moment, then faces him again*
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Darth Vader: I call this one "Really Angry Vader Face"! What, um ... What do you think, my master?
Emperor Palpatine: I think you're an embarrassment to the Sith, to the Empire, and to me personally.
Darth Vader: ... oh.
*turns his back for a moment, then faces him again*
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Darth Vader: I call this one "Really Sad Vader Face".
Emperor Palpatine: Your request for reimbursement is denied.
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thesassypadawan · 2 months
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Come Clean (Hayden x FemReader)
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Summary: You finally get to go along with Hayden to a con!  And you, being the little dork you are, insist on getting a pic with your bf…just like everyone else!  Everything is going smoothly, but this one sleemo in line just won’t leave you alone.  It’s almost like they know about what’s going on between you two.
Warnings: None, just pure fluff. 
Notes: A little something for @jediskywalkerblog!  I really enjoyed writing this, made me feel all warm and giggly!  Hope you like it! ❤️
- What would happen the day the rest of the world finds out about you two? The day you finally come clean.
- In the back of your mind, the thought was always there. Normally you wouldn’t pay much attention to it. Since you both are so careful and keep such a low profile. But on a day like this one…when you’re literally surrounded by his fans. Well, it was kind of hard to ignore.
- To be fair, this was, mostly, your idea. You’ve wanted to go along with Hayden to a con for a while, because you’re so proud of him and, dammit, you support your man. But now that you’re here, seeing all these people, you can’t help feeling a tiny bit nervous. Maybe you should have stayed behind the scenes, instead of insisting on getting a photo with him like everyone else.
- As if on cue, the sound of Lord Vader’s breathing comes floating from his hoodie, that you ‘borrowed’, pocket. ‘Wonder who that could be,’ you joke to yourself while fumbling with your phone.
- Sure enough, it was a text from…
♡Big Dork♡: Have I told you how good your butt looks in those leggings? 😘
- Smiling, you discreetly glance over your shoulder. Hay was, of course, not standing there; only a wall of privacy curtains. But the longer you stare at it, you notice someone looking back at you through the crack.
- Shaking your head, you turn your attention back to your screen…
♡Little Dork♡: Shouldn’t you be taking pics with all these nice folks right now, instead of checking out my ass? 🤣
- Lord Vader breathes again…
♡Big Dork♡: I stepped out for a moment to enjoy the view. 😘 And to check up on you. Still doing okay? ❤️
- You give a small nod for him to see…
♡Little Dork♡: Yep. Now get back out here so I can get my turn with you. 🥰
- More breathing…
♡Big Dork♡: Don’t worry, there’ll be plenty of time for that later. 😉
- You roll your eyes and lock your phone. But, when you do so, you’re met by yours and the person behind you in line’s reflection.
- It was clear that they were reading your whole conversation with Hayden. Not wanting to make it into a big thing, you quickly shove it back into your pocket. Trying to act like you didn’t even notice.
- No such luck. “Oh, I’m so sorry,” they try to fakely apologize. “I hope you don’t think I was prying. I was only checking the ti-”
- Thankfully that’s when Hay stepped back out. The clapter and cheering of the crowd cut the sleemo short, ending the very uncomfortable chat. Or at least that’s what you hope.
- Spotting you, Hay instantly flashes you a smile. Which you, naturally, return.
- You don’t think much of it, but the sleemo certainly does. “Seems like Hayden and you are pretty friendly.”
- Your back stiffens. ‘Kriff! Kriff! Kriff!’ And you keep you eyes forward as you calmly reply. “Sorry, don’t know what you’re talking about.”
- “No?” The sleemo persists. “You smiled at each other just now. Could you possibly be-”
- “Next person, please!”
- Perfect timing. Refusing to let them ruin this special moment, you brush the sleemo off and go walking up to Hay.
- You two exchange mock pleasantries and pose for the camera all cutely (but not too cutely). Nice and smooth and totally discreet. Well, it was, until you turn to leave…
- “It was nice to meet you, angel. I hope to see you again real soon.” Hayden, out of habit, gives your bum a tap.
- You pause for a second. ‘Did he?! Really?! REALLY?!’ Then as quickly and nonchalantly as you can manage, you get the hell out of there. Praying that no one saw that.
- Pretending to act all nice, the sleemo follows you. “Miss! Excuse me, miss! You forgot your photo!”
- Trying your best to ignore them, you continue to weave through the crowd. Moving closer to the restricted access area. The one that Hay told you to go to if anything happened, that you’ll be safe there. ‘Come on! Come on! COME ON!’
- You almost make it too; the goal is just barely in sight. But as you’re fishing out your special pass, a hand grabs you by the shoulder. “I’m talking to you, little miss Hayden’s secret girlfriend!”
- Completely freezing up. You frantically think of what to do next when…
- “Hey! Take your hands off her!” Hay comes bursting out from behind the curtains, the most pissed off you’ve ever seen him. Like literal full blown Vader mode.
- The sleemo immediately lets you go, and you run over to him. “Hay!”
- Burying your face into his chest, he wraps his arms around you tightly. “It’s okay. I got you, angel,” he whispers, kissing the top of your head.
- “So she is your girlfriend!” The sleemo, who was paparazzi all along, shouts as security begins to surround them.
- By now a crowd has gathered. It’s almost deadly silent as they all wait to hear his answer.
- Gazing down, he flashes you a quick grin. “Yeah, she is! Happiest I’ve been in years!”
- “Me too,” you grin back. Standing on your tip toes, you capture his lips in a tender kiss.
- A beat more of silence…before it explodes in cheers and applause.
- “Guess it’s no longer a secret,” you giggle.
- “Yeah,” he chuckles. “Sorry.”
- “Don’t be, it’s nice to finally come clean about it.”
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daftmooncretin · 5 months
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rip to rian johnson but star wars sequels would be way better if ben solo was just kinda cowardly and han solo coded so he defected from the jedi and went to be a fun swashbuckling anarchist space cowboy instead
and finn and poe have to find him and try to convince him to come back to the rebellion but hes afraid who he is and what he could become
also instead of luke trying to kill his nephew for NO REASON (so insanely out of character it boils my blood) he just realises after ben dips thats hes not cut out for teaching. and is living on a mandalorian colony as rebellion liason/ambassador with chewie and sometimes lando i guess (din djarin is there) he aids the rebellion (because of course he would fuck that plotline) but he wont stay on the rebel base because he doesnt like all the chosen one clout and mandalorians are very chill and mind their own business
han and leia are still together and play active parts in the rebellion because fuck that plotline too although they do disagree about the ben situation (leia is annoyed and han is understanding) poe and ben childhood friends and for what.
in this au, rey is raised in the empire and is a sith lord but she has doubts and isnt as abjectly disgusting as kylo ren because of course not. (appears slightly too interested in the rebellion when poe is captured and maybe??? possibly lets finn and poe escape but thats up for debate.) rey gets more evil over course of movies before turning to light for plot drama and a satisfying zuko arc.
force awakens timeline
prophecy that a new jedi will rise and take down the dark side. rey and sith lord (dk who but fuck snoke im writing him out) assume it is the missing ben solo (its finn and rey tho fr) and are intent on finding him. movie opens on rey being evil probably and capturing poe. also finn as a character actully needs no real changes hes great. and then next scene space pirate ben solo doing his thing (but without identity revealed so we dont know who he is yet he may go by kylo because funny)
instead of luke poe has a lead on missing almost-jedi before he dipped ben solo and is searching for him on leias orders.(rebellion also believe the prophecy is about him. but nuh uh) torture scene and escape scene doesnt need to change but show reys nuances and how lost she is.
in the interest of narrative poe and finn still crash on tatooine but finn manages to pull poe out of the crash. (finn still gets the jacket at some point because i say so) poe is too injured to fly so they seek out help and and meet ben solo who saves them from pirates or something idk. (but neither know who the other is)
finn and poe convince ben solo to be their pilot still thinking hes a random smuggler named kylo. they get along very well, especially finn and ben. rey by this point is tracking their whereabouts
they end up on that lightsaber planet and ben gets the weird darth vader nightmare and freaks out, (hes afraid of being evil or something idk) poe is getting suspicious now also finn feels the force and takes up the lightsaber. rey comes and finn trys to hold her off. finn get hurt and drops lightsaber. ben is forced to take it up and his identity is revealed as rebel reeforcements led by han and leia arrive and they see him fighting. rey and ben have a weird charged moment (yes i guess i am still making reylo a thing but its reyben now and its woke so shh) and in a dramatic desperate effort he manages to knock her lightsaber away with the force. poe crawls into a plane at somepoint and blows up reys ship. the rebels destroy the stormtroopers but rey captures finn and escapes in a stolen ship.
ben has a oh-shit-i-said-id-never-use-the-force-again related existential crisis which makes him freak out and leaves. a distraught finn-less poe calls him a coward. poe picks up the discarded lightsaber and the jackettm and sadly packs them up. leia tells him about the starkiller and poe volunteers to go on the starkiller and save finn. han and leia have a sweet moment and han decides to go with poe on the suicide mission, chewie goes too.(chewie arrived at somepoint i guess)
mid hostage situation finn blocks reys force attempt and shes shook up. he sees something in her (finn is a beautiful sweetheart) and he trys to appeal to her. she force chokes him and books it out of there. but it is clear she fears him a little. he escapes with mind tricks and runs into han poe and chewie on the deck. finnpoe moment fr. poe gives him his jacket back in order to get the keep it it looks good on you line.
meanwhile ben is back on his ship(i guess its the falcon?) and he thinks about finn and his mom and luke or something.. a dream maybe?? idk something emotional and motivational for his arc. and he goes to a box under the floor in his ship and pulls out a green lightsaber. he turns the ship around.
on the ship poe finn han and chewie are planting the bombs and escaping when they get stopped by stormtroopers ordered by rey. poe is about to be shot by a big droid thing when it is cut in half by ben wow big reveal hes here oooo ah. rey is shot in the shoulder by chewie and angrily orders more stormtroopers. they cant take them all. han sacrifices himself by blowing up the bridge. he tells finn and poe to find luke in the mandolorian colony ben is distraught him and han have an emotional goodbye he tells him to tell leia he’s sorry and that he loves him and he proud of him then he makes chewy get ben out of there and he blows himself up. leia senses it v sad rip man but he had to die to intensify plot drama
rey chases them onto the ice planet and another weird charged moment. mind link established??? this time ben is too angry and grieving though so its not a good match and she wounds him real bad all over hes v scarred now. poe shoots at rey and throws lightsaber at finn. he gets ben onto the ship and finn and rey have the big force awakens show down. finn uses the force v powerful all that jazz the good guys get away. on the ship finn mentions how he felt a connection with rey to poe and claims he sees good in her
movie ends with meeting luke on mandolore. ben is very traumatised wont really speak to finn or poe and avoiding luke. finn returns lukes lightsaber and rey has doubts movie over. movies ends with ominous rey ben mind link
final notes (on first movie and overarching rewrite plans)
finn
finn is the protagonist of this movie so it would be much more character heavy on him them the original. more in depth on his stormtrooper trauma, how he always chooses the people he loves over the cause and his reluctance to join the rebellion. his friendship with poe and the han/leia parallel’s especially. relationships with han and ben important for his character exposition and he plays a key role in supporting both rey and bens character progression. possesses the strong sense of mercy and kindness at the heart of the star wars franchise.
rey
rey is raised in the first empire and does not know anything different. when she meets finn who was able to rebel and escape from the same system she is trapped in she becomes plagued by doubts and projects all of her hatred and resentment onto finn to compensate, but it is clear she fears him. to escape from her doubts she fixates on finding and capturing ben solo imagining him to be a frightening and terrible adversary. however when she meets him they see eachothers minds, and she sees how plagued by doubt and fear he is, how he runs from everything and he sees her too. they connect and develop a strange mutual fascination/understanding. this is put askew by finns appearance at the end of the movie in defence of ben. reys fear of finn increases when she sees the true extent of his power. she fears and hates equally finns strength of character and easy goodness and by extension hates ben for his alliance with finn. she blames finn for “taking” ben from her.
ben solo
kylo ren is a disgusting blight on the star wars names so ben solo is being completely reclaimed by me into a different character because i fucking hate that stupid pretentious eboy. instead ben solo is an incredibly han solo coded character with a heart of gold and deep love and loyalty to his friends and family. his main weakness as a character in this rewrite is his fear and lack of self belief. ben is terrified of being a jedi and of his own power. he fears his own nature and was so afraid he would become his grandfather that he ran from the jedi altogether. ben solo is a runner that wont face his problems, he runs from the jedi and from his parents to avoid failing or becoming something terrible. finn and ben recognise the need to run in eachother (although important distinction finn runs because he doesn’t want to fight for a cause. and ben runs because hes afraid he will be the reason the cause fails) and ultimately encourage eachother to break the cycle and stand their ground (well finn motivated ben in this movie, finns not fixed yet.) Bens arc in these movies is about learning to live with his own nature and fighting for what he believes in despite his fear. also dealing with mommy issues (ben is kind of jealous of poe and leias relationship the son she wanted or something blah blah blah etc) and being a malewife to his murder girlfriend. his job is kind of to support and fight with finn and later rey and help them save the world
finnpoe (will be a gay couple)
their friendship will be front and centre in these movies because they represent duty vs personal loyalty. poe puts the cause above all else and values his own life and personal relationships little. finn on the other hand is disillusioned with establishment cause of stormtrooper trauma and wants to protect himself and others from it. poe is the first person that finn truly bonds with and loves. he puts poe above everything, including being a jedi and the rebellion. this leads to a lot of fighting and discord between finn and poe as finn doesn’t understand how important the rebellion is to poe and poe doesnt get why finn is trying to protect him from it. ultimately though poe teaches finn faith and belief and finn teaches poe to accept love and value himself. (also many hanleia parallels) the two of them are the harbingers of a new age. poe as future leader of the new republic and finn as the jedi messiah or whatever. in terms of romance, im thinking slowburn. baity first movie, kiss at the end of the second and established relationship by the halfway mark of the third.
also when rey eventually joins the light in the beginning she refuses to talk to ben (cause of romantic drama i havent thought of yet but centres around some sort or betrayal in the second movie) or finn (because hes her narrative foil and slow burn best friend forever) so her first friend is poe and she kind of follows him around in her first few months before she eventually bonds with finn 4eva. her poe shadowing has lots of cute friend moments where they fly together and he tries to talk her down about finn and the ben drama but also more importantly it foreshadows her leadership ability and tactical mind as she gives him advice and aids him with the rebellion behind the scenes (also leads to leia taking rey under her wing probably because poe is her surrogate son and mirror) which will eventually lead to her and poe leading the republic together because in my mind rey is a jedi but actively a member of republic government because ben can’t do politics and finn won’t but shes great at it so she’d be a perfect jedi liason and vice president to poe. meanwhile finn and ben lead the jedi. finn as a knight travelling across the galaxy and ben as a teacher. (luke is happy in retirement rn on mandalore but leia is still probably an advisor in the republic because retirement is definitely not for her) and everyone is happy the end. force ghost han solo is clapping.
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yourimagines · 6 months
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Can you Darth Vader x reader
Searching for you
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* English is not my first language I apologise
* Gif is not mine
* Triggers; angst, swearing, and a bit of fluff
Y/N POV
I was walking through the ship, trying to find Vader. “I’m sorry, do you know where I can find Darth Vader?” I asked politely to a officer. “Woman, do you know who I am? Who you talking to?” He gave me a pointed look. “I asked you something?” “I’m sorry officer, I was only asking you something.” He shakes his head. “A woman like you has no business with Darth Vader, now if you excuse me I have a meeting to attend.” With that he flipped me off. ‘What an asshole.’ I walked further down the hallway till I saw Andrew a friendly mechanic. “Andrew, do you know where I can find Darth Vader.” He smiled at me. “Did you lost your husband again Y/N.” He chuckled at me. “Yes, do you know where I can find him?” He nodded. “Yes of course, follow me.” I did what he asked and followed him through the ship. “I don’t know if it’s the right time to meet him now, he has a meeting soon.”
We walked up to a meeting room. Troopers stood outside of the room. “I’m sorry nobody can enter.” “I understand but she has to.” “No.” Andrew sighed. “Do you know who she is?” “No, but she can’t enter.” I grabbed Andrews arm. “It’s fine, I’ll wait out here.” “No it’s ridiculous!” The doors behind them opened, the officer from earlier walked out. “What’s happening here….oh you again.” Andrew looked at me. “I already asked him.” I said to Andrew, He nods. “Listen here officer Sam, she needs to speak to….” The officer raised his hand. “I don’t understand why you can’t understand the word NO and I already told her that she has no business to do with Darth Vader… it’s outrageous that the two of you interrupting this meeting.” He looked at the troopers. “Make them leave..” he walked back inside as the troopers pushed us away. “Move it you two.” “I can’t believe this, you will regret this!” Andrew said while pointing at both of them. “Let’s go.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me away from them.
We were both waiting at the cafeteria for higher ranks. Officer Pierre walked up to us. “I’m sorry that it happened to you guys, I’ll make sure when the meeting is done that Darth Vader will come and get you.” “Thank you.” I gave him a small smile. “I got us some food and drinks” Andrew placed down a tray full with food. “For free.” He whispered to me. I smiled at him. I picked some food and started to eat. “They all going to regret it, the disrespect they have…” Andrew said while munching on some bread. “It will be fine, we wait for him.”
“Where is she?” I heard the robotic voice of Vader through the room. I looked behind me, he was talking to officer Pierre. “Over there my lord.” He looked at me, striking forward. I stand up and walked over. “You wanted to speak to me?” “Yes but I forgot.” My lip starts to tremble. His hand went up to my face. “What happened?” Andrew stood up. “If I may my lord.” “Speak.” “She was searching you, and officer Sam and his two troops disrespected her.” I looked at Andrew, he was angry. “Is that true?” I nodded. Officer Pierre joined the conversation. “My lord, they both were shaking up from the event, I helped them to calm down.” Vader didn’t say anything, just his breathing was heard. His thumb went over my cheek, looking down at me. “I’m sorry.” I whispered at him, trying to calm myself down. He turned around and walked away. I looked at Andrew. “It’s okay.”
I was waiting in our bedroom, waiting for Vader to turn up. I was already in my pyjamas laying awake in our bed. ‘What if he’s mad at me? For crying, for searching him, for forgetting why I was searching him in the first place.’ Fear was creeping in, I started to cry in silent. Holding my blanket up, afraid of the darkness, afraid of everything. I heard the automatic doors open. I held my breath. I heard footsteps coming closer and closer till it stopped. His breathing filled the atmosphere. “My love…” I felt him pulling down the blanket. I looked at him, eyes red because of the crying. His hand went up to my face, wiping away the tears. “Its okay love, it’s all over now.” His gloved hand wiped some hair out of my face. “I feel you scared, why are you scared?” I took a deep breath. “Are you mad at me?” His head tilt a bit to the side. “Why would I be mad?” I shrugged my shoulders. “That I embarrassed you my lord.” He carefully took a seat on the bed. “I’m not embarrassed, you are my wife, they should respect you, they where disrespecting you, my wife.” I carefully nod. “I’m not angry at you at all, I’m sorry they disrespected you but I made sure nobody is ever going to disrespect you.” I grabbed carefully his hand. “Are you okay my love?“ I nodded. “Yes, I just remember why I was searching you my lord.” He nods at me. “I wanted to tell you that…that I’m finally carrying our child..” his hand went up to my belly. I felt the force going through my body. “You are.” I smiled at him. “I level up the guards for you and I make sure you are never alone.” He stood up. “Are you leaving already.” “Yes my love, I need to take care of these things.” I sat up. “Can it not wait till tomorrow morning my lord?” I stood up and walked over to him. “Please stay tonight.” He turns around. “You want me to stay..?” I nodded. “Yes my lord.” “Then I stay.” I smiled at him, placing a kiss on his helmet. “Thank you, for everything.” He only nods as we both went to bed. His breathing filled the room as I lay with my head on his cold metal chest plate. ‘I love you.’ He said with his real voice in my mind through the force. I snuggled up to him. “I love you too Vader.” As darkness consumed me, falling slowly asleep.
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therealvinelle · 1 year
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When did Dumbledore start his giant grudge against Tom Riddle? What triggered it?
From what we see in the memory of Dumbledore and Tom Riddle's first meeting, we started off at day 0 with this enmity, and the trigger was that Dumbledore... doesn't seem to actually like children all that much. Oh, it's all well and good when they're pleasant and listen with bright and attentive eyes to him, but Tom Riddle was guarded and that seems to have been enough. The way Dumbledore reads nefarious intent into everything Tom, an eleven-year-old, says or does speaks for itself.
(As it is I find Tom in the orphanage memory acts very much like a normal child. Distrustful of authorities and jaded, yes, but that's hardly surprising given his background. Dumbledore's lack of understanding and immediate dislike of what is essentially a troubled child is what I find concerning about the chapter.)
Dumbledore goes on to explain to Harry how... I can't even paraphrase this, you're getting a quote (only a paragraph, or we'd be here all day):
"I had, as I have already indicated, resolved to keep a close eye upon him, and so I did. I cannot pretend that I gleaned a great deal from my observations at first. He was very guarded with me; he felt, am sure, that in the thrill of discovering his true identity he had told me a little too much. He was careful never to reveal as much again, but he could not take back what he had let slip in his excitement, nor what Mrs. Cole had confided in me. However, he had the sense never to try and charm me as he charmed so many of my colleagues." (Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, page 239-240)
(Yes, the guy kept going, beautifully at one point admitting "So I never actually caught him doing anything wrong at any point, but I feel confident in saying he was being evil off-screen all the same" and at another explaining "He had dark glamour, Harry", but I'm trying to be brief here.)
So.
Dumbledore, per his own admission, couldn't catch Tom out on anything even though he kept close watch and we know how uncharitable he is in his interpretation of Tom's words and actions. Notice too, though, how he thinks Tom viewed their first meeting: he believes Tom Riddle was an eleven-year-old politician straight out of Lord Hadrian Potter fanfics. Tom keeps his distance from a professor he doesn't like and Dumbledore says, "Ah, the Machiavellian youth recognizes me as a worthy opponent. How sensible of him."
You can't make this shit up.
So, no, Tom never stood a chance with Dumbledore. It was one-sided Machiavelli at first sight.
(And no, I don't believe this was mutual. Tom acts entirely too normal in the job interview memory, he's having a job interview and Dumbledore is Obi-Wan meeting Darth Vader on the Death Star. It's hilarious, but uh telling.)
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emoani · 4 months
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n/a: I wasn't planning on going back and making this a series but I started writing on wattpad and I will post the chapters there in my language, if anyone likes it I can leave it here too on tumblr, so let's go!
chapter two
Vader looks unsure.
- What it was? You do not want me? -you ask, feeling your heart tighten with insecurity.
Darth Vader leaned towards you, his lips almost touching his. With eyes full of confusion he takes your hand.
- Oh, darling - he whispers - Why would you think that? Of course, I want you.
- You know, we never did anything. And I had to ask to kiss you - you remind him. - And you also know... - he takes a deeper breath - sometimes I still remember her.
- I understand. But I'm a different person, I also want you to love me and remember me for who I am!
- I know, and I wanted to love you so much. But it is hard. I have always loved Padmé. I can't get her out of my head. But I value you, and you are important to me. Understand that I don't see you as a second option. I just... I don't know how to describe what it's like.
He concludes sad and discouraged, knowing that that wasn't the best answer ever. But it was what he could give you at the moment. And you accepted it, because you knew you already had a lot. He never trusted any living being again after the tragedies that happened years ago in his life, you couldn't even tell if he trusted you. Vader was a mystery. A mystery that had been waiting for more than a minute for an answer from him, which never came.
- I swear, I will try - Vader says in his deep voice - Can you kiss me?
You feel sad knowing that Vader doesn't love you in the same way. But as always, you do as he asks. Time seems to pass slowly as he approaches. You hold his face with your hands, caressing his marks.
- I'm here to give all the necessary kisses - you say and join your lips to his, unable to control some tears that fall and mix, leaving the kiss salty. You think about how good it would be if those tears were magic and made him forget everything, all the pain and just love you.
- Do something with me...something you've never done with her - You whisper.
His face lights up for a brief moment and he seems for a moment to have lost the posture of a Lord, becoming embarrassed.
- H-What do you mean, wife? - He breathes nervously - What could I do?
- Anything! You answer him with an innocent smile, and he feels even more embarrassed for having thought about something sexual. Vader takes one of his gloved hands to your head and caresses you lightly.
- I can do anything - He says - And I know I can't give you everything at the moment, but with time I will do everything. I have to be honest, I'm not going to give you the same experiences, because I'm not going to be Anakin Skywalker, I'm going to be Darth Vader.
He's without his mask and you can see his expression full of pain and sadness. His yellow eyes, the color of a Sith's eyes. You dreamed of seeing Anakin Skywalker's blue eyes, but also Darth Vader's. And he didn't care if no one else understood, how could they love him. You didn't care if the whole world was against him, because for you there was nothing else other than him.
- Hey - You remind him - I love you, and all sides of you, Anakin, Darth Vader...
- Please... - He closes his eyes and becomes serious walking away from you - Anakin is dead!
You don't want to make him nervous, so you just decide to get back to the main topic.
- I thought of something now... It may seem silly, but can we hold hands?
- Yes, my wife.
Vader seems a little reluctant, they've never been one to show affection. But even so, he walks towards you slowly, leaving you a little embarrassed but happy. The Lord leaves the room where he was with you, starting to walk through the corridors of Mustafar's castle. The areas are dark and cold. You pass through several gates with Stormtroopers on guard, and several Imperials who don't even dare to look at you.
- Where are you taking me? - You ask curiously.
- Wherever you want - He says with his voice modulated because of the helmet he put on again, but even so you can feel his affection.
He continued holding your hand during the walk through the corridors. You can hear footsteps echoing through the castle, and every now and then a Stormtrooper or Imperial officer looks over at you.
- I have an empire to command. But I can have a walk hand in hand. We have nothing to do now but keep walking.
You smile and laugh happily, moved by his words. Of course he was lying and had a lot of things to do, but he still left everything to walk hand in hand with you for five minutes.
- I wish I could do this all the time - you speak quietly, almost in your thoughts.
- If I could, I would do it every day too. Who knows, maybe someday we'll be able to spend more time like this, for now this is the most I can offer.
- Lord Vader! Lord Vader! - One of the men from the empire appears from somewhere, panting - Sorry, but his presence is being required at a meeting of the Empire's command.
Vader lets go of his hand as soon as the man appears, because he doesn't want to appear fragile in front of too many people.
- Looks like you have to go.
- yes, unfortunately. I'll have to go - He says, sighing, and looks at you, wanting to give you one last kiss.
But he doesn't.
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lem0nshark-writes · 1 year
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"No Holding Back Anymore"
Darth Vader x Male Reader
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Type: smut
Word count: 2102
Warnings: smut, pre-suit Vader, reader's a bottom, inappropriate use of the Force, reader's a Jedi, choking
Summary: You and Anakin were best friends and padawans training under Obi-Wan and you were practically inseparable ever since you met. In known unfortunate turn of events Anakin turns to the dark side and afterwards goes to find you, knowing how you both have felt for a long time and, well, acting on it.
Request: for the lovely @/dead_noodel on wattpad !💕
A/N: This took an unnecessarily long time to edit I'm sorry D: writer's blocks are a binch D: enjoy this little smut ;)  also I'm about to work on and post some of my own fic ideas (before I spontaneously combust for not writing them) before moving to finishing off the remaining requests 👀
Once Anakin, now lord Vader, strode down the empty halls of his former home, eyes gleaming with fire and hatred and a long dark hood covering his head, the sound of his confident and determined steps echoing against the walls.
Before all that went down a couple of days ago the two of you were best friends, padawans trained under Obi-Wan and practically inseparable ever since you met each other. Training, eating, resting and even sleeping together on some nights. You were very close. Sometimes even too close judging by the Jedi code.
You both had feelings for eachother and it was well known to both of you, having read each other's minds in accidental slip-ups, but you've never acted on it trying to live as Jedi should. But Anakin was no longer Anakin, he was no longer a Jedi and none of their codes mattered to him anymore.
After a couple of minutes of walking he found himself in front of your bedroom's door, using the Force to unlock and creak the door open, yellow-red eyes staring ahead.
Hearing the lock and the door open caught your attention, sneaking to the open door you peaked at it to see who the unannounced intruder was.
Seeing Vader standing at the doorway you sighed in relief, "Oh Ani it's you, come on in," you smiled, word of his turning to the Dark Side having had not reached you yet, "I haven't seen you in a few days, where have you been?" you stepped closer to him, worried if something had happened, as he used the Force to close the door again, you coming to a halt when you heard him locking the door.
You didn't think much of it though, thinking he didn't want Obi-Wan or curious younglings barging in out of nowhere, so you shrugged it off and reached up pulling his hood off, his eyes glued to the floor to his side.
"Is everything alright Ani?" you asked seeing his unusually serious and stern face.
"That's not my name anymore," he looked up at you, eyes shining red and yellow, seething with such intensity and power unfamiliar to you.
Air caught in your lungs before you gasped, "…What have you done?" you reached up to cup his cheeks, wide eyes staring at his new ones.
"Don't worry about it," he took your hands in his, lowering them down from his face and holding onto them for a little while, "I've seen the truth, but lets not worry about it now, we don't have to hold back anymore," he placed his hands on your hips, pulling you closer to himself.
"Ani.." you looked up at him, heat spreading across your cheeks at his proposal.
"Shhh… I know you want it too, I've seen it, you're thinking about it now too.." he spoke softly, face just inches from yours, your lips almost touching, his eyes roaming across your face, searching your emotions.
"I-I.." you went to say something, anything to get you both to stop but you know you couldn't, you know you didn't want to stop. Before you could think any longer he crashed his lips against yours into a heated kiss, his lips feeling like fire against yours, dripping with yearning and desire.
Your wrapped your arms around his neck, bodies against each other as he wrapped his around your waist and pulled you even closer, one of his hands finding its way to your cheek, cupping it and pulling you closer to deepen the kiss.
You moaned into it. You've dreamt about this moment, imagined it so many times, and in none of those has it ever felt as good as it does right now.
He slipped his tongue in your mouth as he used the Force to rid you off your top robe, sliding it off your shoulders and tossing it on the side as he slowly moved you both towards your bed. You were already starting to get hard, head racing with all the things he could do to you.
He felt your clothed hard on rubbing against him and he smirked a little, and seconds after you could feel hand-like sensation rubbing and groping against your member, as both of Vader's hands roamed other parts of your body. He was using the Force to pleasure you and honestly that turned you on even more, making your cock twitch against his Force-touch.
You bit your lower lip as his kisses now moved to your neck, leaving soft bites and hickeys all over it, tongue tracing your soft skin, and his Force-touch moving now beyond your clothes, touching you bare now. It made you gasp and moan even more in his ear, precum already starting to leak from the tip of your hard-on.
You started to slowly buck your hips towards him, desparate for more friction on which he smirked and tightened the Force-grip on your cock.
You gasped nearly cumming then and there but as soon as he felt you nearing he'd slow down, sweetly torturing you as his tongue worked your neck and chest, and his hands touching and squeezing your ass. The extra pressure and increased speed both by him and you had you nearing your edge again fast and cumming all over the inside of your pants, some getting over him as well, ecstatic pants and moans echoing through his ears as you pressed even more against him, riding out your orgasm.
He smirked and moved slightly from you, his skilled hands undoing your waist belt as you still tried to calm your breath, cheeks still burning with heat and your legs already a tad bit shaky. Afterwards, he proceeded to remove all of your upper layers using the Force again, followed by your pants and boots, all of it so slow it was almost painful. After he was done, removing his clothes too.
You gawked at his body, having had already seen it somewhat but in this context it was a whole different story.
"I've been wanting to do this for so long.." he spoke softly as he pulled you close again, kissing your lips, now with much more love in it rather than pure lust, though the lust was still there.
"Me too," you nearly whispered, almost as if scared to admit the truth.
He smiled and kissed you again, this time with his tongue as one of his hands moved to your ass, fingers slipping in-between and slowly moving against your hole rubbing across it as his other hand stayed to cup your cheek, thumb rubbing against the corner of your lips, tongue devouring your own.
The friction against your hole had you getting hard again in no time, your new erection rubbing against his own.
He slipped his thumb into your mouth as he still kissed you before pulling away and moving to your neck again before whispering into your ear softly, "Suck baby."
You did as he said, sucking and licking against his thumb between moans caused by his other hand and his lips against your neck.
After a couple of moments he pulled his thumb out of your mouth and used the warm saliva to get his fingers wet before sliding his hand to your butt and replacing his previous fingers with his wet ones, this time pressing harder against your tight butthole getting it all wet and slick with your own saliva.
He slid his other hand to your cocks, grabbing both of them in it and rubbing them up and down slowly as he slowly started pushing one of his fingers into you, earning a loud moan of pain and pleasure from your mouth, once it was all in he started moving it in and out at a slow pace causing such sparks of pleasure rush through you like you've never felt before, not even as you touched yourself while thinking of him. Soon enough his one finger was followed by another, and then another again, before you were all stretched out good and nice and a moaning mess in his hands.
"Ready baby?" he asked, trailing kisses across your jaw, pulling his fingers out of you as you desperately tried to buck yourself further on them, him pushing you onto the bed softly and climbing onto it in-between your legs.
"Yes, yes Ani please-" you moaned out, hole empty and aching for him and any type of friction and pleasure. You felt pressure-like pain creep onto your neck, choking out your pleas in a type of pain bordering with pleasure that turned you on even more. He was using his Force to choke you.
"Call me Vader," he smirked, yellow eyes hungry with lust as he took you in sprawled underneath him, cock hard and twitching and leaking with cum, same cum spilled all over your stomach and hot wet hole closing against nothing, e/c eyes looking up with such a need he's never seen before, it made his cock twitch and harden even more if that was possible. He was mesmerized.
"Master Vader, p-please f-fuck me, p-please-" you begged, unable to hold your need for him anymore.
The title you graced him with through your hazed pleas and your words made his eyes sparkle with devouring lust as he smirked, positioning the tip of his huge throbbing cock against your dripping hole, his gloved hand grabing your cock as he came down to kiss you, slowly starting to push his length into you.
You moaned out so loudly, his thick cock filling you up to the brim like you've never imagined before, once completely inside you sending pleasure-induced tingles all over your body.
He groaned on how tight you were, squeezing against him, he tried so hard not to start fucking your brains out then and there and waited for you to adjust.
And once you gave him the signal he started off slow, both pumping into you and pumping your cock against his cum-smeared gloved hand.
You moaned out pleas and curses incomprehensibly as you wrapped your legs against his waist, pulling him even close to yourself.
He kissed you, tongue slipping into your mouth as he used the Force to once again apply gentle pressure to your soft neck.
"Ahh lord Vader please, ahh f-fuck me.. faster-ahh!!" you moaned out, half choking on the Force and half on his cock plunging deep inside you.
He smirked, loving the way his new name rolled off your tongue, "Moan for me baby," he started ramming into you faster and deeper, pressing down with his free hand onto your stomach having you feel just how deeply he's dicking you down.
You arched your back, precum dripping off the tip of your dick, down your length and onto his gloved hand, your walls squeezing against him.
You started moaning his name in his ear, as loud as you possibly could without getting heard, along with a lot of gasps and moans before spilling all over your stomach and his hand, riding out your orgasm as he still fucked into you hard, nearing his edge as well.
With a couple more strong thrusts he came spilling deep into you, slowing down through his orgasm to slow sloppy thrusts, panting and letting out quiet curses in low whisper-like voice, pulling out once he was all emptied out into you, afterwards flopping down besides you, part-way on top of you. Propping himself on his elbows he moved a couple of sweat-dampened stray hairs out of your face before kissing you deeply.
You gladly returned, holding onto his hands that creeped up to cup your face as he kissed you, kissing you again before pulling away to let you both breathe a little, having not yet calmed from all the action.
"That was-" you started, still trying to catch your breath a bit, him now laying back halfway on top of you, yellow gaze staring up at you lovingly, a fond expression on his face.
"Better than I could ever imagine, it was" he smiled, reading your thoughts and answering them.
"Yeah," you chuckled a little, smiling softly at him.
The two of you rested like that peacefully for quite some time, hand in hand and his head on your chest, listening to your heartbeat sync with his, the war and the wrath could wait, all that mattered at that moment was the two of you wrapped in each other's embrace, in love and together at last.
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raisedbythetv89 · 2 months
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I just started watching White Collar for the first time and a realization about most male written and directed media smacked me DIRECTLY in the face which is that SO MUCH media written by a for men is genuinely just male nerd self insert, non-canon compliant, AU fan fiction??????
Like them writing and creating stories is just “ok so these guys are soooo smooth and well dressed and women just flock to them at every turn and they can get away with anything and everyone believes and supports them when they do mess up and everyone thinks they’re sooooo brilliant”
This media isn’t just portraying women “for the male gaze” it’s EVERYTHING. Everything in these stories is supporting and uplifting mens’ delusions about who they are, how they’re perceived, and how they should expect to be treated. Which is incredibly ironic because anytime media portrays women or the world in the female gaze in a more “in my ideal world things would be like this” instead of portraying us as nothing but weak, broken, unloved, traumatized, victims OR one dimensional sex symbols with no needs or emotions they’re screaming, crying, throwing up about how stupid and unrealistic the story is….
This explains SO MUCH about how male characters are handled in shows like Veronica Mars and Buffy. Even though they’re shows staring women all the “good guys” get the delusional self insert, y/n, AU fan fic treatment (Buffy still wants Angel in season 3 and Riley in season 6 even after everything they did and Xander is CONSTANTLY forgiven for all the atrocious shit he says and does and is wanted by all women besides Buffy. Veronica forgiving Duncan and getting back together with him and even CONSIDERING Piz could truly only be born from men being delusional AS FUCK. Writing how they want men to be treated by women rather than being based in reality and the woman having even an ounce of self respect.)
Which is why the “bad boys”, Logan and Spike are such better characters. They’re so much more realistic, they get held accountable by the women in their lives, have better growth and are just way more appealing and attractive because they’re not the walking embodiment of what MEN want men to be treated and act like.
Oh god this feels like such cursed knowledge to have like it’s important to see this media for what it really is but now watching it feels that much yuckier like finding the porn of someone you DO NOT LIKE but like their emotional porn “this is what life would be like in my fantasies” and they’re the fantasies of the grossest men alive 😭😭😭😭😭
Also it shows their emotional maturity like all of these things are what 13 year old boys fantasize about not actual mature, grown men….
Also just realized this is why the Star Wars sequels were so hated. It wasn’t just Rey being powerful and loved by her found family and Kylo. It was that the movies showed the reality of men like Kylo. They destroyed the male fantasy Darth Vader created. They aren’t super cool, powerful badasses. They’re extremely sad, broken, temper tantrum throwing lost little boys who just want love and acceptance but have lost the ability to accept it because of the dark side (aka the patriarchy) which is the reality and that made me SOOOOO ANGRY lololololololol and this is why Joss Whedon THOUGHT making Spike into a sad pathetic mama’s boy of a poet would make the audience not like him because that DOES work on misogynistic men who enjoy the male gaze but does NOT work and only humanizes and makes Spike even more complex and lovable to the female gaze 💀💀💀💀 oh good lord
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read42 · 9 months
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I sigh, my legs falling freely softly swaying, as I sit on the desk contemplating my life or the lack thereof. Vader looks at me silently and speaks up, "what is bothering you, my precious star?" I look at him wondering if he could be serious.
"My life has been stolen" I reply.
Vader looks at me coldly "No I have brought you here to this palace and provided you with wealth and luxury" he pauses glancing around, "look at all the beautiful things we have here".
I scoff, "beautiful things? What about my freedom? What about that or love? REAL love."
"My dear wife, my love for you is true. You are a rare beauty, and I will take care of you. Your freedom must be sacrificed for you to understand my desire to keep you safe."
He approaches me and puts his arm around my shoulders.
"Do you not love me?" He questions.
I laugh loudly causing him to look at me in anger.
"No. Not at all. You are psychotic" I smile sarcastically.
He smiles coldly. "There is no need for harsh words" he pauses.
"I have given you a privileged life, and you will learn to love me in time. Now, enough sadness, no more tears."
I scoff for a second time. "I will not shed tears over the likes of you."
"My little star, your defiance does not entertain me. Do you not understand the consequences of your actions?"
He walks in front of you now, his stature towering over me.
"I will not be talked to like I am some common pest. I will be loved and appreciated."
"Careful you sound desperate." I say snidely.
"My star, you must understand it is your place to make me happy, to please me." He leans down close to me, his face is just inches from my own, his breath fanning on my neck.
"I am a Sith Lord. I am not to be disappointed."
"A shame because you certainly disappoint me my lord" I hiss out.
He grips my chin tightly and looks into my eyes and for a split second, I can feel his anger. He takes his other hand and smacks me across the face, his voice cold and calm.
"My darling little star, I do not take these insults from you lightly."
I grunt in pain at the impact.
"I am not to be defied." He says
his expression softening a touch as he looks at me, his breath and face close to mine.
"Star please do not make me punish you again." I shiver in slight fear.
"I hate you" I say venom in my words.
he smiles and caresses my hand, his expression now seemingly showing real care or something similar to it.
"How could you ever say that to me? After all that I have given you?"
"Your crazy do you understand this? You are crazy." I spat out at him.
"My precious little star, you must learn to respect to me. I have been far too generous with you, and you have taken advantage. No more." He grabs me and lifts me up to his eye-level, his breath inches away from my face.
"What are you going to do?" I question him
He looks me dead in the eyes and I swear I can see in his mind, he's trying to decide what to do and is contemplating different cruel punishments, I'm sure of it.
"I... I will punish you, my love. But I will do it only because I love you dearly, otherwise I would never."
I laugh dryly, "You do not love me. This is obsession".
Vader smiles again, his expression changing from one of care to one of sadistic amusement, his eyes looking through me with pleasure and amusement
"My star, you are right. In fact I do not love you, I desire you. After all, the feeling of possession drives me more than the feeling of loving another."
his eyes assess me up and down whilst staring at me with clear lust in his eyes
"You're sick" I whimper slowly inching back
He leans down to me and whispers....his lips right next to my ear, "I am, aren't I? Oh how I love it."
His tone is dark, his smile evil, "and now, my love, it is punishment time." he smirks
"No wait!" I all but scream.
I'm pinned down to the wall behind me and he moves in much closer then before as if he was about to give me a kiss. His breathing is shallow and he is looking at me with some type of hunger
"No use trying to beg my little star." he whispers "your protests arouse me. Now, I am going to show you what a punishment is like."
"You can pretend all you want Vader... but I will never be her..."
The expression on his face turns from amusement and lust, to anger and frustration.
"Yes, I know, my dear. I will never have the real Padmè and the love she felt for me. You are nothing to me but a sad replacement that I will now have the pleasure to abuse."
"She'd be disgusted and so disappointed" I say trying to play on his emotions. He doesn't bat an eyelash at you, "I can't replace her and you know it!" I begin to panic.
"Oh, don't worry, my dear. I do not intend to make you into her. But, because you do remind me of her so much, I will remind myself of her through you." his grip on me tightens, he brings his lips a centimeter away from my own.
My heart thunders in my chest.. "what if I can learn to love you?!" I start trying to weasel my way out of this one.
"My dear, you do not need to learn to love me. I am your husband, and you may not have any choice in this matter. You will love me, or I will teach you to." his eyes scan up and down the length of my body, his breath heavy and shallow. His grip is very tight.
"Or rather...make you love me."
I knew I was screwed.
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hannagoldworthy · 6 months
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WARNING: POSSIBLE SPOILERS FOR STAR WARS LEGENDS
One take I regularly see from the “Jedi Critical” corner of this fandom always manages to baffle me: “In Legends, Luke Skywalker corrected the mistakes of the dogmatic Jedi Order!”
Since my days as a dumbass first-time tumblr user, in which I was rather sternly corrected by older users if I got too aggressive in my arguments, I’ve tried to steer away from pointing out how STUPID that take is. But? Nothing’s saying I can’t make a post of my own about it!
So.
With the bare minimum of due respect.
What fucking book did you read where Luke Skywalker corrected his own fucking mistakes, let alone those of any Jedi who came before him?
Because from what I’VE read? Luke had a nasty habit of doing the same things everyone criticizes the Prequel Jedi for doing, only ramping the ante up in a way only a Skywalker trained by TWO of the Disaster Lineage can.
Mace Windu threatened a “helpless” old Chancellor in his own office and was trying to assassinate him? Gag me. Luke Skywalker electrocuted Shimrra Jamaane to death with Force Lightn-pardon me, “eLeCtRiC jUsTiCe.”
The Jedi Order of the Prequels used Padawans as “child soldiers”? Please. Luke Skywalker possessed the body of his nephew to duel Exar Kun…when Jacen Solo was TWO, a FUCKING TODDLER. That’s not even getting into the number of very young teenagers who died horrible deaths as SOLDIERS in the war against the Yuuzhan Vong - for pity’s sake, Anakin Solo was knighted at sixteen and KILLED AT SEVENTEEN, where his grandfather’s knighting at nineteen was considered a rush job!
The Galactic Army of the Republic was a slave army? So was the army of YVH-1 battle droids built to battle the Yuuzhan Vong invasion! “Oh, but those were just droids” yeah and? The anti-Jedi folk cried when Anakin Skywalker was rightfully punished for not wiping R2’s memory of sensitive battle information, and they’ve outright said they have more sympathy for the battle droids than for the living, breathing people defending themselves against the battle droids. Not to mention, Legends had a Droid’s Rights movement in full swing at this point in time, so? YVH’s were people programmed from “birth” to die in battle. Next question.
Obi-Wan was too mean to Darth Maul and Darth Vader when he cut off their limbs? Alema Rar would like a word! Luke Skywalker permanently crippled her lightsaber arm, his sister cut off one of her feet AND one of her lekku (brain tails, that HAVE HER BRAIN IN THEM), AND put her in the way of a spider-sloth that BIT HER IN FUCKING HALF. And this was after Luke helped raise her as a youngling and HAD A VISION OF HER TURNING TO THE DARK SIDE, and did FUCK-ALL to prevent her from turning!
On the topic of doing fuck-all to prevent something…oh, was Obi-Wan Kenobi unable to prevent his Padawan from being groomed by a Sith Lord? Well, Luke Skywalker GAVE his son Ben as an unofficial apprentice to Jacen Solo, who turned out to be Darth Caedus and mentally, emotionally, and physically tortured Ben for six years! And, while Obi-Wan did not like Palpatine and continuously advised Anakin not to trust him without even knowing Palpatine was Sidious, Luke fully suspected Jacen was headed down a dark path and still encouraged Ben to be his apprentice because he was afraid of the Skywalker legacy dying with him.
Obi-Wan Kenobi flirted inappropriately with enemy generals? Luke Skywalker banged them. No, seriously, Legends Luke’s sexual body count is in double digits, the man was an unrepentant fuckboi. Mara Jade, Calista Masana/Mingla, Gaerial Captison, Shira Brie, some blonde named Mary who was in one comic to die at the end, fucking ABELOTH? Yeah, Luke only married one of those women, BUT HE FUCKED ALL OF THEM. And now, we have the DinLuke ship (which only exists in fanon, so I will count it as Legends) to mirror the Codywan ship (which actually has some basis in canon), just to cement that Luke Skywalker is a persistent playboy for BOTH teams. He loves them and leaves them like a pro.
Oh, there’s a persistent fan-theory that Korkie Kryze was Satine and Obi-wan’s secret love child? There were rumors that Brisha Syo was Shira Brie’s daughter with Luke…rumors that were credible enough that Luke had to do his own investigation into the matter. Shira Brie, aka Lady Lumiya, whom Luke blew to smithereens when she tried to kill him, and fought her with no mercy when Darth Vader pieced her back together and sent her to fight him again. So, while Obi-Wan has a rumored lovechild from a respectful relationship with a woman who opted not to tell him, Luke legitimately blew up his alleged baby mamma in the void of space with the bare minimum of regret.
Yoda and Obi-Wan sent Luke to kill his own father because they couldn’t manage to do so? Luke sent his niece, Jaina Solo, to kill her TWIN BROTHER because he could not bring himself to kill Jacen himself. And, while Luke was understandably torn up about killing Anakin, Jaina had a Force-bond comparable with a canon dyad withh Jacen - it hurt her a lot more when she killed Jacen than it ever would have hurt Luke to kill Vader. She nearly DIED of heartbreak, that’s how bad it was.
Obi-Wan hurt Anakin’s trust by faking his death and going undercover? He beat the crap out of Anakin to maintain his cover? Luke hurt Leia’s trust by faking turning to the Dark Side, becoming a reborn Sidious’s new apprentice, ACTUALLY FALLING TO THE DARK SIDE, and mentally fighting Leia WHILE SHE WAS PREGNANT, to the point she WENT INTO LABOR EARLY.
Obi-Wan beat Anakin in a duel and left him to burn to death? Luke Skywalker BEAT THE LIVING HELL out of Vader until Vader was wordlessly pleading for MERCY, which he DID NOT DO ON MUSTAFAR.
Now.
Is there any nuance in Luke’s situations, throughout all of these examples? Yes, there is...but there’s also nuance in the Jedi’s situation in the Prequels, which no one seems to acknowledge in their case. So, whatever grace I extend to Legends!Luke being an imperfect and fascinating character, also extends to the Jedi being imperfect and fascinating characters in their own right.
I love Legends!Luke BECAUSE he reminds me of the Prequels Jedi, not because he corrected any of their “mistakes” (he did not. He very clearly did not). So don’t come at me saying Legends!Luke was better than the Prequel Jedi. I have read the books! I have kept the receipts! AND I WILL USE THEM.
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gffa · 2 years
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AN UNDERRATED MOMENT:
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This fight is so great because the choreography is one big love letter to the prequels fight scenes, you absolutely can tell they studied those movies and how these characters moved and had them move like that again, but also. Because Obi-Wan just straight up goes YOINK and rips the lightsaber out of Anakin’s hand to win the fight. And say what you will about Anakin Skywalker! Sure, he may have completely failed to understand what Obi-Wan was actually trying to teach him about letting go of his need to be validated by others (even when Obi-Wan is validating him in that conversation, oh, Anakin, you are my favorite muffin), but! Anakin Skywalker sure as heck PAID ATTENTION TO ONE THING. Because in the scene IMMEDIATELY AFTER THIS ONE we get that absolutely incredible fight between Vader and Reva and MY BOY SURE DID LEARN ONE THING:
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HOW TO JUST GO YOINK AND THE SABER IS HIS NOW. HE EVEN GIVES HER BACK HER SABER LIKE OBI-WAN GAVE HIS BACK. WELL, HALF HER SABER. (THAT’S PRETTY GENEROUS FOR VADER HONESTLY.) AND IT’S ONE OF THE FUNNIEST MOMENTS I HAVE EVER WITNESSED IN A STAR WARS VIDEO GAME WHERE YOU’RE THE POV CHARACTER IN A VR GAME WHO HAS TO DEFEAT A BUNCH OF DROIDS WITH A LIGHTSABER YOU JUST PICKED UP LIKE FIVE HOURS AGO AND VADER IS RIGHT THERE AND LOOK THE ONE THING WE ALL AGREE ON IS THAT ANAKIN SKYWALKER IS REALLY GOOD AT DESTROYING DROIDS WITH A LIGHTSABER BUT HE JUST MAKES YOU, THE COMPLETE NEWBIE, DO IT FOR HIM ANYWAY AND WHEN YOU’RE ALMOST FINISHED, WHEN YOU HAVE JUST ONE DROID LEFT AND YOU’LL WIN THE BATTLE WHAT DOES THIS SHIT LORD DO?
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YOINK, YOUR SABER IS HIS NOW AND HE MAKES THE DRAMATIC FINISHING MOVE AFTER YOU KILLED THE THIRTY OTHER DROIDS IN THERE GOD HE’S THE WORST BUT TO BE FAIR HE LEARNED THE ART OF THE SABER YOINK FROM HIS MASTER WHO IS ALSO THE ABSOLUTE WORST I LOVE THEM BOTH THEY’RE AWFUL
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