Did some more art of Sleipnir while finally watching Lake Mungo.

Also fixed the brightness on those other two so maybe they’re a little easier to see now.

They will stomp you with their fancy little gossamer hooves.

Unwilling Mermaid (Closed)

@lunar-realms (Thank you for putting up with my BS, Kitana! 💜)

The day had been a good one for travelling, no rain and only a couple of small encounters on the roads. After deciding that they wouldn’t reach the bounty location in one day, Ian and Namira had taken the time to set up camp for the night alongside a lazily flowing river. While Ian went to gather firewood for the night, Namira found her fishing gear, still tucked away in her backpack, and went to catch them some dinner.

She knew from experience that trout and salmon could be found in these rivers, and even as she climbed onto a rock in order to cast her line out further, she reminded herself to be careful. “At least there’s nobody else around to scare me this time,” she sighed, casting her line out and waiting for a bite. While she waited, she let her mind wander.

It always wandered when she was around water, and there was that niggling compulsion to jump in. That always bugged her. “You know very well that I can’t swim, brain. Cut it out,” she scolded herself.

Ever since that trip to Waterdeep when she was sixteen, she’d felt compelled to swim whenever she was close to open, deep water, despite the lingering trauma and fear that had developed after that trip. Trying to shrug it off, she turned her attention back to the line, when she felt a sharp tug. Just as she went to brace herself to reel in the fish, she slipped on a wet, mossy patch on her rock, and only had enough time to give a surprised yelp before falling into the river.

Ugh, not again! She thought, and would have rolled her eyes if she weren't so focused on getting back to the surface. Her lungs were already burning with the need for air, and panic was beginning to set in. No, don’t panic. Panic, and you die, isn’t that what Brelynna said back then?

A sudden, searing pain rushed through her nervous system and she let out the breath she had been holding in a silenced scream, bubbles floating almost mockingly to the surface. She tried to follow them, but found that her legs weren’t working properly. What’s going on? A glance downward told her why they weren’t working, and she would have screamed again if she still had the air to do so.

Slowly and painfully, her legs were merging into a tail, something she hadn’t seen in nine years. She was suddenly very glad that she hadn’t been wearing her armour, since her trousers had shredded off, either from the fall or the unexpected change.

Another sharp pain sliced through her, this time focusing on her neck, and she gasped in a mouthful of water, fully expecting to choke on it. When she didn’t, she tentatively reached up and touched her neck, then yanked her hand away when she felt something moving beneath it. What are those called again? Gills? No, no, this has to be a really messed up dream! 

Dreams didn’t hurt, though. Now that she could breathe again, she was forced to watch in horror as her change finished, with millions of tiny pinpricks of pain that were her scales forming. They wrapped around her new tail tightly, like well-made chainmail, and she could feel them forming on her torso as well, hiding under the loose shirt that was also weighing her down. I just can’t win today, damn it. 

When it seemed like everything was finished, Namira gave her new tail a clumsy flick, which pushed her closer to the surface. Another clumsy flick, and she broke the surface with an unnecessary gasp. She hadn’t gone too far from the rocks she had been perched on, and she clung to one to avoid drifting in the lazy current. Her tail curled around it as well, trying to anchor herself, and she felt sickened at the sight of it. Brilliant teal scales shimmered in the early evening light, and darkened to blue closer to her feathered-looking caudal fin.

It was too much. Namira squeezed her eyes closed and did the only thing she could think of. Call for help. “Ian!” She cried out, hoping he would hear her, before her breath hitched in a small sob. Please let him hear me. 

So I finished S3 of Wisting last night (thanks again @houseoftrinity 🤗), and like the 2 previous seasons, it was great. I'm usually doubtful of the quality when it comes to crime drama tv shows. The US can have good ones but they never last and the ones that last are pretty generic and all a carbon copy of one another. We can have some gems in France but it's rare (HPI with Audrey Fleurot comes to mind) but French TV shows are pretty much a pale copy of American shows. So when I watched S1, I had doubts. Norwegian show, language I don't understand and all that. Carrie-Anne guest starring was enough a reason to watch it anyway.

And well what a surprise it was. It doesn't shy away from the horror of the crimes, they show you the bodies, the blood. I love the investigation part. The show is so well written and the acting is so good. They don't overdo it. They make it real and that's why you dive into the story, why you want to see it to the end, to know the truth. To see the killers get what they deserve.

I found Line so annoying in S1 but she grew on me. Same with Nils. I cried when Torunn died in S2 honestly. You care about the characters more and more with each ep, it kinda was a surprise for me.

So S3, when the head was found, I really believed it was a ritual crime or something. Wouldn't have imagine it would have something to do with drugs 🤷🏻‍♀️

I could feel Suzanne was involved from the beginning. There was no freaking way she wasn't. And I was right 😏

Those poor kids being used after fleeing their country... Khaled and Hanan being reunited did something to my heart 🥺

Now about Maggie 😁 I love her take no bs attitude, I loved it in S1 and loved it in S3. That move when Sammy had the knife and her jump out of window, damn 😳😍 I just love her. She gets involved emotionally into her job and that's why she's good at it. I was so scared for her at the end, thought she was going to get injured or worse killed. Relieved when she wasn't but damn the gun she had wasn't even loaded. Talk about unnecessary risks my poor heart 😅 She risked her life to be sure that American ex soldier wouldn't hurt anyone else. So yeah she's excellent at her job but a bit too much reckless if you ask me.

Can't talk about S3 without mentioning THAT kiss. Like I knew it had to come from her bc he definitely wasn't going to make a move but I didn't see it coming during that scene 😅

How frustrating it is tho, that they got interrupted and they didn't talk about it. I mean we know they like each other since S1. I was like well finally something happens and after that nothing. Case closed, she leaves and that's it. 1 step forward and 10 steps back.

4 eps felt super short, I guess that's why we didn't get to see a lot of things.

Wisting is a such a good quality show and I hope they plan for a season 4. I would love a storyline connected to France, a fangirl can dream 😁

Perfect Fit (Loki x Reader)

Peter Parker tells reader about what Loki thinks of them.

A/N: Another oneshot, this time featuring Spiderman as the medium for Reader and Loki. Also, my headcanon remains that Loki refers to Peter as Spider Boy. As always, Gender Neutral Reader!

Warnings: None! Fluff n’ such!

Your eyes peered up from your paperwork to catch sight of the fidgeting teen sitting in front of your desk. You empathized with him. It was always some sort of hell fire when Tony or any of the Avengers reprimanded one of the outlier members for failing to complete a mission in time, or failing to follow a inward duty to protect others. Although the consequences of the damage the young Spiderman had left behind were very minimal (extensive property damage, but no one seriously hurt), Tony still upheld his duty as Peter’s pseudo guardian, and laid it hard on him.

As part of the process, you were in charge of filling all the damage reports and costs left behind by the throws of battle, and Tony ordered Peter to witness the extent of his mistake through financial eyes. Or maybe through boring clerical work. Whatever the matter, Peter looked absolutely nervous, probably dreading to hear just how much his antics caused the city (or Tony).

“You know I’m not actually going to tell you how much cash Tony is going to have to fork out, right?” You asked him, causing him to jump slightly.

“What, really? I mean, are you sure? ‘Cus I’m sure Mr. Stark wanted me to, uh, witness the depth of my carelessness.” He stuttered in response.

“I mean yes, you definitely want to be more cautious. But this, in comparison to Tony’s own damage cost analysis, is almost nothing. I’m sure this is just his weird way of wanting to make sure you’re keeping the citizens and yourself safe out there. Also I feel if I tell you, you’re going to be harder on yourself than you need to be.”

Peter let out a nervous chuckle. “Yeah, I guess you’re right about that. I really am sorry about what happened, I did try to be as careful as I could.”

“I’m sure you did kid. The important thing is that building was insured, and that no one was seriously hurt. You good?”

“Yes, yes!” He responded hastily, and you almost felt the weight being lifted from his shoulders. “I’m just glad you’re just as nice as Mr. Loki mentioned you to be.”

You shot a quizzical look at Peter. “Uh, Mr. Loki?”

“Well, yeah? Mr. Thor’s brother? I’ve seen you both together a lot here at the facility.”

Of course you knew who he was talking about, but the fact that Loki made his chipper self into this conversation was odd at best. From your documentation, you found out Loki had been assigned to this small escapade in the outskirts of the city. It actually made you content to see Tony’s mistrust in him begin to dwindle, allowing him to participate in the Avenger’s daily heroism. You could almost see his sour face once he found out this precise squad would be lead by Tony himself. But it made sense.

“What’s Mr. Loki doing gossiping about me to you?” You asked teasingly.

“Nothing bad! I can swear by that!” Peter said, putting his hands up in defense. “I think he just wanted me to feel better.”

“That’s a good one kid.” You chuckled. “It’s a miracle on it’s own to have Loki talk one word to anyone. You have no idea how long it took me to have him say a simple hello to me.”

“Really?” Peter asked, slowly pulling his hands down. “I know Mr. Loki is always very reserved, and he was a little scary at first. But he’s actually kind of, really nice too.”

“You must have a very skewed definition of nice.” You said sarcastically. You jested however. You had experienced Loki’s ‘niceness’ firsthand, in his own bizarre way. Loki’s form of nice didn’t really fall under your typical definition of it. Nice was, for example, telling someone thank you, bringing thoughtful gifts, buying someone lunch. Loki’s nice more so included telling you that you were being stupid and foolish for failing to believe in yourself, and that you should be ashamed of yourself, blah blah blah. He got the right intention, but his delivery was horrible. You cringed at the thought of poor little Peter having to go through that.

“I mean, maybe? He was very helpful during the mission, and his strategy at the whole thing. I was like, wow! He moved so fast in between everything, I had such a hard time keeping up. Though, maybe that’s why I got so distracted in the first place.” He sighed, still blatantly defeated for his error.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself though. For what it is, I think you’re a pretty talented kid too.” You said with a toothy smile. “Loki’s just a big show off though.”

He laughed in a much more relaxed manner. “Thanks, that means a lot. But I must have really taken it hard when Mr. Stark raised his voice at me. Mr. Loki approached me and told me I’d be sent over to your department and how you’d be very welcoming, nice and easygoing.”

You were slightly irritated at how Loki found it so easy to tell Peter all these likeable things about you, yet still failed to do so with you in person. Yet, you knew his reason’s to do so with Peter. Again, Loki wasn’t the most approachable man in the universe, but that didn’t mean he was completely heartless. His words with Peter, while few, were carefully chose to make the young teen feel less anxious. You mentally reminded yourself to give a him a big smooch the next time you saw him.

“I’m actually really happy to hear that.” You said, leaning against the back of your chair. “It looks like he found someone who he’s comfortable with, so that gives me some peace at mind.”

Peter became obviously confused at your comment. “I’m not sure I get that.”

“You said it best at first. He’s a scary fella. But it seems you got to him somehow. So trust me, from now on you got another set of eyes keeping watch of you, making sure you’re safe out there.”

“Actually, I think that make’s me a little more nervous.” He said sheepishly.

“Oh well yeah, be very wary of the God of Mischief.” You said ominously, followed by a snort and giggle.

“Oh, wait. Are you and Mr. Loki dating?”

Your giggles soon stopped, as your mouth remained agape in shock. Again, this was not where you expected a conversation about Loki to go to. You now felt like the nervous teenager in the room instead. Through its entirety, both you and Loki did well at keeping the relationship under wraps, understanding the impending chaos that would ensue if anyone (Tony and Thor) would find out. Well, maybe Loki could care less, but you still had a job and income to maintain. While inner work relationships were not uncommon here, there might be some adherence to having a relationship with someone who used to be on the blacklist.

“No.” You said lowly. Even you wouldn’t have believed that no.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to insinuate anything like that. It’s just, Mr. Loki seemed to have talked fondly of you, and I do see you both together quite a bit. Also you both look really good together, but like not to mean you are dating or anything!”

“Okay Peter! I think we’re done here. I’ll take care of the rest, tell Tony you learned your lesson and all BS, and you can be on your merry little way, yes?” You said, rummaging through you documents, and handing Peter a crumpled up slip with your signature on it.

Peter took the slip slowly, unsure of what he hand uncovered with his innocent introspection. “Are you okay?”

“I’m super.” You feigned through a false smile. “Thanks for dropping by, but I got some more work to do.”

The young teen, still bewildered by your sudden agitation, took it for nothing and soon tip toed out of your small office. You let out a heavy breath and slumped in your chair. It seemed you were in the clear for now, and you figured Peter would be a smart kid and avoid spreading unnecessary rumors. Also for the sole fact that his life would be at risk if Loki were to ever find out he’d tattle at Tony. Still, your mind raced back to the encounter Peter had told you about, and how Loki made a worthwhile impression on the young teen. It warmed your heart knowing someone else seemed to have approved of your gloomy partner.

Towards the end of your shift, you were visited by said partner in efforts to soon spend a relaxing evening at your home. Loki casually seated himself on the seat in front of your desk, arms crossed over his chest.

“I hear the Spider boy paid you a little visit?” He asked playfully.

“He did in fact. He’s a sweet kid.” You responded, eye still glued on your computer screen. “A little naive, but sweet.”

“Stark was relentless on him today. Dare I say, I felt sorry for the lad. He looked like a scared puppy.”

You hummed in a chipper manner. “Yeah, he told me all about it. He also told me how Mr.Loki made him feel a whole lot better today.”

You heard Loki grunt, a way for him to avoid talking about it. You figured it was still awkward for him to hear about his ‘good deeds’ with the type of shit he’s gone through.

“He was very impressed by your skills set. You may have a little fan boy in the making.” You grinned, finally closing your laptop. “I think we should adopt him as our child.”

“You’re hysterical.” He responded flatly.

“I’m mad at you though.” You said as you began to gather your belongings.

Loki raised an eyebrow at you. “Pray tell why?”

“How come you tell Peter all of these nice things about me, yet you always avoid doing so to my face?”

Loki remained quiet, draw back by the nature of your question. You meant to approach the subject in a playful manner, still understanding how Loki had his own special way of showing affection. Yet, you saw how Loki rested his chin at the top of his knuckles, analyzing and concocting an appropriate answer. He looked adorable.

“I suppose I really haven’t done so.” He said admittedly. “What would you like to hear?”

You felt your face heat up. “It doesn’t really work if I tell you what I want to hear. Also, that’s embarrassing.”

“Ah. Of course.”

“Peter told me all the good things though.” You began. “It does make me happy that you think that way about me, instead of an absolute bother.”

He rolled his eyes. “I do hate your incessant ability to self-deprecate. However, everything else the Spider boy mentioned is absolutely true.”

“How lovely to hear.”

Loki stood up and began assisting you with your bags and belongings. You smiled with a strong sense of satisfaction, promptly turning off the lights in your office.

“I also forgot to mention to him that you’re amazing, and incredible.” He whispered behind you. “That I love your smile, and I love how your hand fits so well into mine. That I always look forward to seeing your bright eyes every single day, that I-”

You felt your lips begin to twist in both joy and uneasiness. You jabbed Loki slightly at his side, urging to promptly stop before you explore. “Cut it out. I can’t tolerate this level of cheesiness.”

He smirked mischievously at you. “Then I will have to draw out my admiration for you with the Spider boy if you aren’t able to tolerate it. I’m sure he would be more than happy to hear about it.”

“You better fucking not.”

---

Later in the evening, a young Peter Parker, overseeing the block from the top of a building, took note of Mr. Loki firmly leaving the facility with you, hands hidden, side by side. Upon further inspection, Peter deducted it would be best to keep quiet about this encounter, sensing how distressed you had been about it earlier today. He felt correct about his assumption however; both you and Loki looked good together.

IT Chapter 2 - Review

So I just watched IT chapter 2 about an hour ago and to be honest ... the movie is very good but it is not great and I'm a little disappointed. So here is what I liked and what I didn't liked (spoilers ahead).

What I didn't like:

I hoped the movie would focus more on the adult losers. But there were a lot of flashbacks ... I didn't liked that in the miniseries and I didn't really liked it in the new movie.

Again they changed the book material and cutted out the microverse and maturin. Instead they used native americans, magic, some rituals and maturin was a plant...

The whole arc about the artifacts seemed stupid and unnecessary to me.

The ritual of chüd failed... And was done wrong. And the thing about being bound to the physically form and it's laws ... was BS.

There were too much jump scares in the first half of the movie. And some of the cgi didn't look very well.

They could have done more with Henry. I liked his conversation with pennywise in the old movie. Here Henry is interacting with his corpse friends. I liked that bit stil...

The trailers teasered a Pennywise origin story/ backstory. That didn't happened at all. The pictures and the scene with bill skarsgard without his mask had nothing to do with Pennywises story.

To be honest pennywises new true form was a little bit lazy. I saw a lot of really cool fan designs for his true form. Those were awesome... the one in the movie wasn't bad but also a little bit boring.

There wasn't enough of pennywise in the movie. I hoped there would be more about his character but no ... I would have liked to see more of him. Learn more about the lore ... the book has some chapters from his pov. But they didn't include much of that.

I wished in the end pennywise would have pleaded with the losers like in the book. Fighting for his life while offering them all they ever wanted. It would have shown how desperate he was. And I hoped we would see his eggs or the guess he might be female.

What I liked:

The cast was very good and the acting was on point. I liked watching all the characters. The adult Eddie was one of the best tbh. He and his younger counterpart had almost the same facial expressions.

The aduld richie was way less annoying than in the miniseries. I liked him and his story with eddie.

I liked the baseball scene with the little girl. I felt very connected to the scene since the girl and I have the same name 😂 but pennywise was at his best here.

Everytime pennywise was on screen. We never know what would happen next. Bill Skarsgard owned the movie.

The flashback scene mike and bill had about the natives fighting pennywise. That looked really good.

The references to other king books and movies.

Steven King as the grumpy seller was funny as hell. Like the pun about 'bad endings' 😂😂 I felt that!

Kiss me fatboy 2.0. Kiss me like it's the last time 😂

Pomerian for the win!!

Here is Jackie!! 😂

Billy killing his guilt... Literally.

Mike going nearly insane.

You sloppy Bitch!

I really liked what he did with this house.

You're my angel your my darling angel... 😂😂

Pennywise singing for Richie and everybody in the background joins in on the musical number.

So as you see I really enjoyed the movie... it was more funny and entertaining than scary but thats okay since I have seen so much horror movies til now there isn't much that can scare me anymore. So I enjoy other things in movies. The first was a coming of age story with horror in it and I enjoyed the character dynamic, the looks and a lot more. Same goes for this one.

And again. It was a good movie but I expected something else and didn't get what I was hoping for. So in the end. Chapter 1 was better but Chapter 2 was good too.

Top 5 Games Of The Year Runner Up And Honorable Mentions

Runner Up: Doki Doki Literature Club (THIS SECTION CONTAINS BIG SPOILERS, IF YOU HAVEN’T PLAYED DDLC AND ARE INTERESTED IN MAYBE TRYING IT HERE’S THE TL;DR It’s good, it plays with your expectations in a very good way and in a multitude of ways, it’s a great little piece of media that brings to life an extremely good character. Also it’s free, go download it on steam.)

Look, maybe it’s because I don’t consume a lot of horror media but this game really stood out to me. Not only for it’s genre though, also for the high quality of its writing and with how great the game is at accomplishing the one and only thing it truly sets out to do: Convey Monika as a character. The horror elements themselves can be a bit hit and miss and some of them are quite predictable, but I feel the game is excellent at building a continuous sense of dread as the player continues through it. It rapidly ratchets up the intensity of its content after taking just enough time for the player to settle in and get comfortable and mixes in JUST A COUPLE of jumpscares (which honestly it probably shouldn’t) in order to keep the player unsteady enough in terms of expectations to keep that dread building. Regardless, throughout the game Doki Doki Literature Club does a great job taking advantage of player expectations both of dating sim visual novels AND of horror writing to ultimately become something just a little bit more. It becomes an excellent character exercise and exploration. Thanks to some smart programming in service of the game’s ultimate intent, to make Monika into a ‘real’ character actually ended up giving me one of the deepest scares any piece of media, video game or otherwise, has ever given me. And it did it without any secondary stimuli like sound or a jumpscare or horrifying visuals. No, in a completely calm moment all that was said was this:

And I REELED back in my chair because the suspense and the dread the game had been building all impacted me at once. You can’t deliver that kind of scare in someone without some smart writing backed up by some VERY smart programming and understanding of player expectations. Honestly Monika is such an excellent and fully realized character despite the game being so short it’s astounding. By taking care to give her a lot of special conditional dialogue, pages upon PAGES of missable content, and even meta-content such as her having unique dialogue that only appears while looking through the game’s files it really just all coalesces into making Monika feel almost real, real enough to give me the willies and to feel a bit sad for her by the end. DDLC is a divisive game and I understand if the game’s handling of certain themes or content doesn’t sit well with other people but for me, and I say this as someone who is no stranger to suicide attempts, the game never went to far. For me it all worked in service of the game’s narrative and Monika’s character growth. Honestly even just little details like how the piano in the soundtrack only starts playing for the first time once Monika is introduced and only ever stops when she’s not watching you or how there’s a lot of different horror elements that only occur randomly so not everyone has the same experience or how some can only happen in fullscreen or in windowed mode, it’s really amazing attention to detail and consideration of her character while also making the game more unique as a product. DDLC was really good. It gave me some good scares but it also gave me a good story and a GREAT character to appreciate. Even if, like me, you’re a bit of a weenie when it comes to horror content I’d wholeheartedly recommend DDLC as a read, assuming you both can handle a jumpscare or two and can handle game content that involves suicide and self harm. I know I didn’t get too in depth here but I wanted to avoid spoiling TOO much and honestly I already said too much as is! Please excuse me! Honorable Mention #1: Yo! Noid 2 - Enter the Void

It’s not often you get a game that’s developed explicitly as a joke that’s so good. Yo Noid 2 is a solid, fun, and funny platformer. It’s all pretty clearly built just to tell one joke right at the very end but the ends ABSOLUTELY justify the means. I can’t talk too in detail about this game without ruining why it’s special, but Yo Noid 2 is a legitimately fun 3D platformer, with good level design, a relatively expressive moveset, a very special Special Action Button, and honestly a great soundtrack to boot! Its difficulty ramps up in a good way across its very short 90-150 minute length culminating in a very fun final boss fight. PLEASE go download Yo Noid 2, if you like 3D platformers and want to have a good laugh it’s 300% worth your time. It’s even free, you have no excuses!!

Honorable Mention #2: Mega Man 11 Mega Man is back, again, and they really did a good job expanding the franchise. While I still like entries such as 9, 10, and 4 better personally there’s no denying MM11 expands the franchise in a positive way more than any other before it. MM11 takes the time tested side scrolling design of the classic Mega Man series and adds just enough of a new wrinkle with the Double Gear system to really expand the player’s horizons and to push their level design concepts. While Double Gear and in fact all of the secondary weapons are entirely unnecessary as is tradition for Mega Man games MM11 does a great job incentives smart use of these mechanics, keeping them balanced with a shared cooldown system between both gears (power and speed) and making every single one of the Robot Master powers actually useful! Also all of the robot master designs are really charming this time, I was initially worried about the addition of voice acting but the voice cast does a great job! The level design is also a treat, while the length of the levels varies DRASTICALLY and Wily Castle 1 is dramatically longer and harder than another other stage in the game overall it’s very easy to just jump into any level and challenge yourself. There is no obvious first boss, they’re all pretty tough, and I started with Acid Man myself. The only thing about MM11 that let me down was the soundtrack; it wasn’t bad it just wasn’t bombastic either, merely present during play but not sticking in my memory at all. MM11 is a great entry in the series and I hope it signals a true return of one of my childhood favorites with more games to come soon.  Honorable Mention #3: Fire Emblem - Mystery of the Emblem (FE12) Taking the great concept of remaking FE’s earliest titles that Shadow Dragon started and actually putting in the elbow grease to make the game really good, FE12 is a stand out entry in the Fire Emblem franchise. While some aspects of its map design are somewhat held back by the original iteration, FE3′s age, the developers at IntSys really did a great job modernizing Archanea and paying good tribute to the characters and story that made this game an absolutely beloved classic in the first place. With overall good map design, modernized mechanics, the best use of an Avatar Character in the franchise, and massively improved unit, class, and weapon balance over the original FE12 polishes its source material to a razor shine. Top it all off with a decent story and great new content that adds a bunch of new dialogue to the characters and this is the definitive way to experience Archenea and its inhabitants. Except for Marth, he was better in Shadow Dragon. Besides Marth’s characterization taking a step back and the gaiden content being rather slapdash and forgettable, this game is everything a remastering should be; Taking what worked and polishing it, improving what didn’t, and adding all new content that fits in with the original game in a productive and fun way for fans. The addition of a wide variety of gameplay difficulties and including the until this game INCREDIBLY rare BS: Fire Emblem expansion chapters previously exclusive to the Super Famicom Satellaview this game cartridge is bursting with good content. It’s a fun, fun game with a lot to offer and great replayability thanks to its BULGING roster of characters and deeply customizable avatar character. If you like Fire Emblem as a franchise I’d heavily recommending finding a patched FE12 rom out there, harder though it is to do now. You owe it to yourself to experience this game. Oh, just play with the battle animations off, they’re REALLY ugly. Still, this game puts Shadow Dragon’s lazy near-direct port of an NES game to DS to shame. Honorable Mention #4: A Hat in Time - Seal the Deal This DLC has been getting some backlash and frankly I don’t get why. While I was a bit disappointed the new chapter was shorter than the base game ones the Death Wish side of things offered a TON of great new content and new ways to experience past challenges. For its modest price point this DLC really does everything I could possibly hope for out of a 3D Platformer expansion. New, tougher challenges to really push my skills, fun new content that fits right in with the base game in terms of quality and polish, and in A Hat in Time’s case GREAT new boss fight experiences. Taking every existing boss and turning them into a downright Superboss level difficulty fight, remixing all of their attacks, speed, patterns, and adding all new stuff to them is such a great idea and I really loved it. Seal the Deal is a ton of fun as long as you aren’t averse to an easy base game getting a VERY challenging DLC expansion. I can understand why the difficulty whiplash might turn some people off but for me it was just right and really hit the spot. A Hat in Time is just so good, I love it.

Thoughts on the finale

Where the fuck is Kyle

Let Cordelia and Misty kiss you cowards

Moira is still trapped in the house and not reunited with her mother, this is awful

Tate and Violet but honestly their reunion was kinda rushed and weird because that dude still raped her mother and I'm not buying this whole 'the house with his evil energies' bs

Where is Constance in the new timeline?

Marie is still in hell, I call bs

Myrtle is still dead and that sucks, okay?

Madison is still in hell, I know Mallory says they're going to get her out but Madison just saved them (bought them time) and Mallory is just like 'nah let that bitch stay a little longer' what

Are there now two Mallorys? The one back from the Apocalypse timeline and the 'normal' Mallory in the new one?

Why did they have to kill him

Cordelia herself said he's just a scared, little kid because that is what he is for fucks sake

He was used and abandoned his whole life, give that boy some love and a caring environment to grow up in and don't hit him whit a car, what the fuck Mallory

Still thinking about his reaction when Cordelia stabbed herself, so shocked but not like 'I wanted to kill u nooo', how he seems to need her, I don't know, I just think if he had the chance to grow up with the guidance of someone like Cordelia, protecting him like she does her girls, he could have become a great man maybe he knows, maybe wishing she was the one there for him when he needed guidance and not the satanists because he could have been good, we all know

I wish they focused more on the dynamic of the two

I mean why show us how twisted Micheal was his whole life, between his heritage and himself, just to kill him in the end as the villain

So explain me something Ryan, the whole antichrist thing was because a ghost had a child with a human, that was the whole fucking point and now two humans can also 'do it' ?????? What?? I don't get it

This ending was a mess

And rushed

We got so many unnecessary flashbacks but when flashbacks could actually be useful 'nah just jump right to it' , okay

Like his full Antichrist glow up, I need that

What exactly is the sanctuary???

Or cut it and just give us a proper ending

Ps bless Cody Fern

First Year Third year Headcanons

I'm sorry, this is super long, but I'm on mobile and don't know how to put things under the cut. So without further ado:

CAPTAIN YAMAGUCHI

Ok, so my reason for that is that he's pretty much the most responsible one there--Hinata is pretty trigger-happy, Kageyama is very blunt, and Tsukishima is a snarky little shit. Also, Yamaguchi is gaining a lot of confidence already, and by third year, I think he'll be just fine!

He is more stable than Hinata and more encouraging than either Kageyama or Tsukishima, and he already takes care of everyone

He somehow just... Knows everything. That one thing you said to your dad when you were seven? He knows. The reason your spikes are off? He knows. The super embarrassing this that happened in third grade? He Knows.

(Seriously hoW DID HE EVER FIND OUT ABOUT THAT WHAT)

He is well-known as the power server

Once scored 11 points in a row, 8 of them were service aces

Has perfected the jump floater, jump serve, and ceiling serve

Also has a serve that's really similar to Oikawa's spike serve

Has gotten over a lot of his nervousness

Has had to yell at Tsukki for being dumb once again in second year

Is (unsurprisingly) the only captain who never had any problems with getting Tsukki to listen to him

Is reeally good friends with Hinata

Has evolved from muttering insults and snarky comments under his breath to passive-aggressively slipping them into conversations

Pretends he doesn't have a favorite kouhai

VICE CAPTAIN KAGEYAMA

I think that Kageyama would be vice-captain mostly for his expertise

He probably has the most experience and the most knowledge of anyone on the team, so he would be pretty qualified for the position

Still really blunt, but more expressive than he was

Has become more like Oikawa in that he is more perceptive about bringing out 100% of his spikers

Often stays behind to practice with the first years

ACE HINATA

Has grown, like, two centimeters since first year

But is ridiculously buff

He bounce

Is literally the most feared spiker in the prefecture

Is still REALLY good friends with everyone (aone, goshiki, kenma, lev, etc.)

In the top three spikers in japan

Hyperactive as ever

The first time someone called him 'the little giant' in an official match he literally shrieked so loud one of the first years fell over

Did actually end up spiking the Miya's serves in the all-japan training camp

Everyone kind of wants to hate him because he beat them but they just can't because look at this child

In the end, he's always friends with everyone, no one can escape him

IRRITATING BLOCKER TSUKISHIMA

I say irritating in the most complimentary way possible

As in, he always just appears right there and where the hell did he come from hE WAS ACROSS THE COURT TWO SECONDS AGO WHAT

He is like Tendou and Kuroo both with his blocking and with his shit talking

He has taken his penchant for being an ass and now uses it to mercilessly shit talk the other teams

(Kuroo says the Tsukishima would have done well in nohebi)

But really, he becomes insanely good at read blocking

He's a pretty formidable attacker too, now that he has finally managed to build up some stamina

He still shit-talks his team but oh, someone help the poor soul that speaks a single word against them he will take their dignity and their pride and shred it into a million tiny pieces

Don't insult his team

MANAGER YACHI

She!is!so!perfect!

She isn't the cool-headed, composed manager that Kiyoko was, but she definitely isn't the nervous wreck she was in first year

She still gets really flustered, but it's a controlled type of flustered where she gets things done

Keeps notes (color-coded, of course, because what are we, animals?) on how well everyone's improving!

So! Cute!

Still gets kind of nervous in crowds, so the team always walks in a circle around her so she doesn't get too scared

Most of the teams know that there is a strict no-flirting policy, mercilessly held up by the other third years

-Yamaguchi will come and say some bs about how she's needed elsewhere and then leads her away while sending them one of those glares of his

(The one where he's kind of smiling but his eyes are like fucking daggers and they see their life flash before their eyes)

(This is actually Yachi's favorite form of salvation, which makes sense given the others')

-Kageyama will go up and just silently glare at them with the intensity of a black hole

-Tsukishima will roast them to a damn crisp and then casually lead her away

-Hinata just... Jumps as high as he can between Yachi and the person flirting with her as he screams at the top of his lungs

And if the other teams flirt with her then

Well

They soon realize their mistake

(Because if you even look at their Yacchan they will defeat you and it will be the most devastating loss you have ever suffered)

She calls Kiyoko at least once a week with some new terrible horrible tragedy that cannot be remedied and will end in at least seventy-eight people dying

Kiyoko is truly a good senpai to the very end

GENERAL

They?? Don't seem to realize??? that they are a powerhouse team???????

They're always like 'oh wow this team is a powerhouse they're gonna be hard to beat!!!!!'

But it never really sinks in that they are literally one of the best teams at nationals like?????? How do you miss this????

Hinata has evolved from the scared first year running into scary third years at the restrooms to the scary third year running into scared first years and honestly, he isn't sure how to deal with this

They all study with each other around exam season (yes, even Tsukishima)

After everyone else started calling Tsukishima 'Tsukki', Yamaguchi started calling him 'Kei'

And if anyone else does it, both Kei and Tadashi just glare at them because no that one is reserved

Soon after, Tsukishima starts calling him 'Tadashi'

After Kageyama grew out of the whole 'king' thing, Tsukishima started calling him various versions of 'insolent child' in the most condescending way possible (playing on the fact that he's the youngest of the third years)

Hinata, in turn, became 'senile old man'

Well, that was super long (and also completely unnecessary) but!!! I really like first year third year headcanons!! So yeah!!

My more coherent thoughts about TLJ under the cut

Look let me just say this off the bat, I didn’t like this movie.  Which is weird because I don’t think I ever left a movie being like what was that trash?  But let me go into detail so (the two people interested) you know where i am coming from.

1. What the fuck are they doing with the Force?  The whole Leia in space story was 100000% unnecessary.  Like Obi Wan and Qui Gon need devices to breathe underwater, Anakin can’t stop himself from catching fire but Leia can survive being spaced?? She gets knocked unconscious (and death should have been IMMEDIATE), wakes up and floats away? The fuck?? Leia using the Force=cool, the space adventure=stupid AF.

1a. The whole corporeal astral projection bullshit.  Like??? What? Projecting himself, okay but making it corporeal? That was some fanfic BS.

2. Speaking of Luke. What. The. Fuck. Did. They. Do. To. Luke’s. Character?

Luke. Luke Skywalker. The same man who

Saved someone he didn’t know because they were going to kill her

Jumped into a snubfighter to almost certain death, ignoring Han’s offer of safety, to assist in the rebellion

Abandoned his Jedi training, his Jedi training. The one thing he has wanted to be since he found out  his father was one to save his friends.

Refused to give up on his father who (as much as I love his character) was an actual monster with several on screen atrocities attributed to him and even more off screen ones.

Refused to fight his Father

only attacked his Father for the love of his sister

Turned himself into the Empire because he knew he could save his Father 

Threw his lightsaber away, and told the Emperor that he failed

In his possible final moments accepted the force lightning, hoping his father would save him

dragged his father (who was big and heavy) through a crippled and about to explode death star to a fighter because he was determined to save him body and soul

gave his father a proper Jedi funeral when no one would have blamed him for leaving the body where it was and saving himself

THAT Luke Skywalker wanted to kill his own nephew. His nephew who had yet to do a dark deed?  Why did they have to assassinate the personality of one of the most cinnamon roll characters in the Star Wars universe to try and justify Kylo’s actions???

3. I thought Finn and Rose’s storyline was stupid and weak.   Them failing was fine but the whole I have to find a master code breaker and return in 18 hours bit was too much. They should have had more sweet moments besides the sudden kiss imo but that is a small thing. It was an ill thought out plan and ugh. But that tracking bit also leads into:

4. The fact that one of the main story lines was basically OJ Simpson’s Bronco Chase in Space was boring.

5. How did the Resistance get so weak and small?  Even in the heyday of the Empire, the Rebellion was never that hard up but the Resistance is even worse off?  I could see if it was a couple months after the Hosnian system destruction and their allies were too scared to help them and the Resistance’s supplies have been depleted. (Though the destruction of Alderaan just increased rebellion numbers but whatever).  I am so confused because it seems like this movie happened right after TFA but there are some things that would make more sense if it was weeks or months after. The timing is messed up. It’s like Rey’s storyline was a couple days ahead of the others and only meshed when she went aboard Snoke’s ship. 

6. Why was Holdo so secretive? You know what they could have done (instead of the dumb ass tracking thing), is have there be a spy in the resistance who is telling the first order what is up.  That is why Holdo doesn’t tell the plan and Rose and Finn could have been hunting down a spy. PUT DOWN THE IDIOT BALL.

7. Making Kylo the Renperor.  I want his redemption damn it, not this BS.  

8. Too much Deus Ex Machina with BB-8

9. The whole destruction of the all bombers.  WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL YOUR SNUB BOMBERS???? Where are your Y-wings? Your B Wings? K wings are EU only but the Y and B are in the movies.  I get that these new ones are heavy bombers but what idiot bought those slugs?  Those should be for surprise or ground assaults. Christ. 

10. Yoda. Really?

Okay Jesus Pvivax, was there anything you DID enjoy??

1. I’m not a Reylo fan.  Was pretty much ambivalent to the pairing honestly. BEFORE this movie. Holy SHIT. Pretty much any moment with Rey and Kylo was amazing.  THAT storyline was well done IMO.  I was all over that nonsense. Especially them fighting together?  I could watch that on repeat all day.

2. Killing Snoke like that yaassss (Though also no because who WAS Snoke???? If he was a rando just tell me!)

3. Rey being no one. I am all over that. I like that she’s not a SKywalker or  Kenobi or whatever.  (Her being Finn’s sister thought would’ve been cool tho)

4. Poe. He made stupid mistakes but overall A+ to him

5. Holdo was a bad ass, despite the idiot ball holding.

6. Despite not liking her storyline, I ADORE Rose.  Give me a spin off movie, a novel, this is all I want.

Azoff Rumors

I’m terrible like this and don’t have the source, but I saw that there was some sketchy anon who apparently is claiming that Irving Azoff convinced Louis to do babygate in order to screw him over, ditch “difficult” fans like Larries, and promote solo Harry with a het!Harry image.

The OP was clear that this is not to be taken as fact, so don’t get me wrong; this is not a condemnation of the OP.

I did, however, find that theory to be implausible and because it’s such a dramatic yet somewhat plausible idea, I wanted to make a post about the things that don’t make sense.

Screwing Louis over entails that Louis and Harry and the whole band would find out that he’d been screwed over (if this were real and the fandom were hearing about it, you’ve got to assume the boys would already know)

This pretty much eliminates any chance they have of signing the more lucrative 1D band (their last album sold more than 2 times Harry’s album did in the 1st week), or if there’s somehow a binding deal in place, of having them cooperate and re-sign later

Yes, Harry’s popularity could grow, but 1D is a sure thing, Harry’s future popularity is not, so from a business perspective, 1D is still very valuable as a band, and if you have both solo Harry and 1D that’s ideal

This also pretty much means losing Harry’s good will and cooperation

In this vein, Harry seems relatively happy with his promo so far, accepting that happiness is a nebulous measure

Also, Harry has seemed relatively unstrained with Jeff Azoff who surely would be hit with some of the fallout if this were true

We’ve seen the boys show strain with people on their teams that they’re supposed to love before, so it’s not unlikely that we would see it now if there was strain

Harry doesn’t want het!Harry

Harry was perfectly happy to send a barrage of signs that he’s not straight and that Larry is a real thing, he did this over the course of several years and there’s nothing to indicate he would happily stop

The fact that Harry’s band is wearing rainbow shoes, Harry wore a rainbow pin and jacket, that rainbows were in Harry’s album booklet, and that Harry’s support of the LGBT+ community was a talking point in his promo indicate his continuing desire to not be seen as straight

If Azoff plans on marketing Harry as straight, again, I can’t see Harry jumping on board with that, especially when it’s a step back from the FOUR promo season and Harry and Louis slowly being allowed to be seen near each other again

We’re back to the point that pushing het!Harry, especially by throwing Louis under the bus, would lose them Harry’s good will and cooperation and any chances of re-signing him

If they were using het!Harry to get rid of Larries and build a more expansive and diverse fanbase, you would assume they would want to stick around in years to come to reap the long-term benefits

Harry’s promo so far has included the regressive 1D vs. Zayn narrative that is fake and serves no one but the old team

Alienating Zayn, again, means eliminating Azoff’s chance at signing the most lucrative part of 1D, the 5-person band

Solo Harry gains little to nothing from furthering this narrative

Solo Harry’s dissing Zayn conveniently comes in sync with Solo Liam’s dissing Zayn (after having been the most pro-Zayn narrative-wise for a long, long time)

Again, bringing up Zayn at this juncture is pretty much unnecessary for both Solo Harry and Solo Liam

The fact that it was brought up again for both and that the spin was the same means that there was coordination between teams which there shouldn’t be since Liam and Harry have completely different teams

This isn’t necessarily negative or tied to Syco, but we’re still seeing other coordination with the boys- we’ve seen new brand deals spanning across all the boys, notably Gucci, and again, this shouldn’t be happening since their teams are supposed to all be different

The only people who really gain from making Zayn look bad and making the band look fractured and the hiatus like it’s not going to end are Syco and Modest

Across the board, Syco seems to still have their fingers involved in all of 1D’s stuff somehow

Seeing that several boys are still at least partially controlled by Syco somehow, it only makes sense that all of them are, it makes more sense to think that continuing link is responsible for narrative delays and regressions rather than Azoff

Liam’s babygate 2.0 and solo promo (that basically revolves around babygate 2.0) that heavily promotes Cheryl

the subtle yet noticeable push to make it seem like the hiatus isn’t going to ever end and will just end up being a break up that came from both Liam and Harry

the negative Zayn stuff that came from both Liam and Harry

Niall’s validation / involvement of the narrative for babygate, babygate 2.0, and Liam’s bearding with Cheryl

Louis’ continuing link to Syco as his label which has done nothing but sabotage him

The continued “Simon is great!” BS spread in Dan Wootton’s interviews (Harry and Niall at least) and other interviews the boys do

Oh yeah, just the fact that Dan frickin’ Wootton is still getting interviews, even podcasts, with the boys, Niall is still connected to Modest, but discounting him, you’ve still got Liam and Harry who have no reason to be giving The Sun or Dan priority

Have they really acted like they wanted to get rid of Larries?

There was definitely a struggle during FOUR promo and OTRA between the old team’s closeting tactics and a new push for Harry and Louis to be able to publicly interact again

presumably some powerful force was working in the boys’ favor against the old team, and that would be their new team, believed to be Azoff

There has definitely been a split between how the US press spins stories relating to all the boys vs how the UK press does

it’s long been speculated that someone powerful is trying to protect the boys in the US, probably Azoff

Larries are most visible when they’re reacting to something bad, so all they had to do to keep Larries while not scaring off new fans, is not give Larries anything major to push back against

Harry’s current image minus some of the het stuff basically ensures no push back as long as they don’t touch Larry to start with (don’t poke the beehive with a stick and you won’t get stung)

If they want a more varied fan base, those fans are going to be casual and aren’t going to be in the fandom spaces of the current, more hardcore fans, so it doesn’t really matter if Larries are figuring out things that are supposed to be secret

Is het!Harry really essential to gaining new fans?

They’re already sending mixed messages with the het!Harry in the promo and yet the rainbows and LGBT+ talking points in interviews, so they can’t be too worried about some gay rumors scaring people off

TV shows, movies, and comic books have already accepted that the LGBT+ community is valuable / profitable to market to

Possible Azoff Smear Campaign / Fandom Demoralization Campaign

To be honest, I’ve seen a lot of rumors and discussions about Azoff not being as friendly to the boys as the fandom previously thought in the last few months, and it makes me feel like there’s a campaign to make the fandom distrust Azoff more than it makes me feel like Azoff is actually the bad guy here.

There are people who pay attention to when and how fandom chatter changes to various BTS people involved with the boys.  I’ve seen theories before about how Syco is trying to deflect negative attention from some of their people elsewhere, so I see no reason that the negativity towards Azoff couldn’t be just another way to deflect attention.  

Also, making the analysis fandom believe the boys are trapped yet again with an unsavory team for an unknown amount of time, and making Larries believe that New Team doesn’t want them anymore than the old one did, is sure to be demoralizing.  Who has been trying to get rid of these sectors of the fandom for a long time?  Old Team.  Who benefits from demoralizing fans so that they leave the 1D fandom?  The same people who pushed so hard for fans to think the hiatus was a break up- Old Team.

The Disappointment Factor

Anons are always sketchy sources since anons can be so easily used for spreading narratives and gaslighting.  At the same time, I think a lot of the fandom is just disappointed that things haven’t gotten better as quickly in the timeframe that we’d hoped for.  Because of that, I think people are taking it out on Azoff who was viewed as a “savior”, now that the saving hasn’t happened as of yet.

Fandom analysis has always been guesswork because we don’t know what’s going on BTS, so fandom expectations of Azoff were never based on any concrete promise or timeline.  That means that there’s no reason to blame Azoff over anyone else that fandom expectations haven’t been met. 

Conclusion: Don’t Think of Things That Are Uncertain As Certain

Obviously I fall in the camp that believes that Syco’s continued involvement is to blame for the negative things we’re seeing, but I’m not demanding everyone else necessarily believe it.  

What I’m doing is saying to take speculation about Azoff screwing the boys over with a dump truck full of salt and consider the reasons I give above for why this particular rumor doesn’t seem to add up to me.

We tend to think we know more than we do about what’s going on BTS.  We just don’t.  We don’t have enough information and we don’t have reliable sources.  The more we think we know for sure, the less we’ll consider all the angles of what’s going on, and therein lies the potential to severely misinterpret things.  

I just want to urge everyone not to get caught up too much in the trends of opinion in the fandom, and especially not the negative ones which are always more likely to cause damage.

strikercorbie replied to your photoset

What the flying fuck is this??

I’m assuming you read the tags, so lets start from the beginning.  This got long fast so under a read more it goes~

A coworker “E” invited me to join her husband, sister, and son on a new dnd campaign.  They’ve played dnd for years, gone through multiple campaigns, most of them with her husband “R” being the dm.  I chose a Firbolg as my first character, a giant soft boy named Fig raised by dwarven monks in a brewery.  He was scared and not born to fighting.  He was also trans, which I didn’t tell R. 

(I was going to work actual white into his outfit later, but it should be obvious his color scheme is based on the trans flag)

Right out the gate (literally less than 5 minutes into the campaign) R makes a quip about how one of the female player characters was extremely hot and that the two men of the part (Fig and a dwarven cleric) are showing obvious interest.  in their pants.  

(please imagine the literal pain I caused myself trying NOT to eyeroll in front of R at this)

I didn’t follow through with this idea of his, and tried to vaguely insinuate that Fig wasn’t attracted to anyone.  Like me, who is ace.  R obviously wasn’t happy about me not continuing his “funny” joke, but the subject was dropped. The same sort of joke came up again with the main antagonist in our story, a YOUNG, UNDERAGE GIRL.  Again I didn’t take the bait, and thankfully after that he stopped trying that sort of “joke”.

However this campaign was broken into chapters, and R wanted to play a character in the next chapter and handed dming off to his son, J.  

We only played a single session with J dming, because he never planned ahead, and R spent the whole time belittling him. (this wasn’t new, every session R was doing this to his own son)

Because that campaign essentially fell through, and with the release of the Ravnica expansion, R began a new campaign, and @gettinziggywithit​ was invited to join in place of my coworkers sister. (who had stopped coming because of bs reasons all her own, and so R just killed off her character.  No one was sad about this)

R has a... passion? for writing up characters, so he wrote up a dwarven bard for Katie, which she decided to give an apprehension engine instrument.  (which is such a fun idea and played well with her characters personality, but I think R forgot this or just decided to veto it outright) (this isn’t important to post but it was important to me)

In this I made a female human rogue (as R had made a small comment prior in direct relation to the “joke” from before about how I played a male character) named Nora, who was basically Dexter (from same named show).  E also made a female character (ranger gnome? I cant remember), and their son J was to join later.  

Our first session, we are trying to leave this bog area, and we get ambushed by...Sucker Eels!  A creature of R’s own creation!

What do sucker eels do you ask?  They jump into your mouth, lock themselves in, and proceed to lay tons of eggs inside you that unless you get to a healer in time, will devour you from within.  That is if you don’t suffocate during the process, as trying to dislodge them make them burrow DEEPER.

Both Katie and my characters fucking deep throat some eels, all to the amusement of R.  Our characters get healed up, but we only do 2 sessions.

At the same time of these sessions, R starts talking to a coworker about doing a game with them as well, which this coworkers wife would DM as R wanted to actually play for once.  So, I write up a new character, a dwarven female rogue named Ira Octava.  Who is my Dragon Age: Inquisition character.  Who was based on my fantroll.

(don’t talk to me about ASLOD feels I will ALWAYS have ASLOD feels dude)

I headcanon that dwarven women also grow beards, Ira just likes to shave.  Also she’s 19.  Also she’s trans.  Still didn’t tell anyone.

This campaign started out well enough, but it quickly devolved as R kept redirecting the focus.  Also I should note, he makes pretty well balanced and fun characters for others, but his own characters are min/maxed to hell.  which really isn’t fun to play against.  

This campaign also only lasted 2 sessions.  Not because of R, but because we had to drive 2 HOURS (because R and E refuse to use toll roads, which would have made the trip 45 minutes) to the coworkers apartment, where a 5 year old treated us like a jungle gym, stole our dice, and tried to get into every bag/purse we’d brought.  Which the parents really didn’t give a crap about.

NOW

R suggested, because of the drive and the time restrictions, that we should try a session over discord.  He would gm this one, and we’d be moving away from dnd and working with the mutant and masterminds set up.  Superheroes and the like kind of game.  Right off the bat I new I wanted to play a character I already had.  Dude McMarrs.

Dude’s story came to me in horror packed dream filled with space crafts, aliens, body horror, death and humor.  Also you know, Venom was still fresh in my mind, and I literally already had a symbiote character so it was an easy choice.

The thing is, Dude is also trans male.  That was part of the dream, and I refused to remove this from his character.  Again, I wasn’t going to tell anyone in the game, as I knew it would be made into “a thing” somehow, which I hate.

Except, I was already getting tired of R’s bs attitude, humor, and opinions.  So when on the one trip we made to go talk about the game and characters in person, he makes the remark “You don’t play male characters well”, I make the dumbest statement alive.  I say “well he’s trans.”  like that’s different somehow.  Not my best moment, but I was getting frustrated.  I felt dread immediately.

R is questioning it at first, kind of like “why?”, and then tries to science against it with “no trans individuals in space because of taking hormones”, and I actually make a stand and shut him down.  We’re doing a superhero setting, which is a fantasy world, WITH SPECIFICALLY HIGHER ADVANCED TECHNOLOGIES AND MEDICINE, and you’re going to try and be “realistic” about a trans dude in space?  I didn’t back down, and it payed off.  I actually win, I get to have this character be themselves openly instead of once again hiding it.  

This happened 2 months ago, and I kept making it a point to be firm about Dude being trans.  And R actually seemed to be okay with it.  I was filled with confidence about this game, and being relaxed with a character I knew.  I was starting to think maybe R just had a crap sense of humor, but was actually a decent human being.

Now, I don’t know.

The post came from an email he sent to everyone, basically asking for background info and basic character info.  WHICH HE HAS ALREADY FROM ME.  On that info, Dude is labeled male, because he is male. He’s a trans man, he is male.  period.  

But the thing is, he could have just left it at “are you a boy or a girl?” and there would be no hurt.  That’s standard questionnaire stuff and it doesn’t bother me.   Instead, he typed out the additional “(there is no third answer)”.  That was unnecessary.  That was intentional. 

And ya, I may be taking this overboard for a character, but this statement also invalidates my identity. I’m agender.  I’m still working through my own social concepts of gender and gender roles, but everyday I accept who I am and that I am agender.  So seeing this, honestly hurt.   Does R know I’m agender? No. and I had no intentions of telling him before this.  Now I just really don’t want to be a part of this group.  Even though I was excited for this game.  But whatever, it’ll either never even start as other people are dragging their feet, or it will be abandoned pretty quick.

END OF RANT BONUS: Your standard instagram bathroom mirror photo of Dude before the shuttle mission.

A guy happy and comfortable in his own body.  Thanks for reading.

My live reactions to 12x16:

Let’s start with the basics: 1 where’s the angel and 2 I love Claire Novak

BLESS that small flashback to glasses!dean rip me

fun fact I had literally never heard of a Moscow mule before I moved to Denver lmao

lol I’m this Hayden girl I will absolutely not go down the scary path in the woods because I don’t want to die first

oops she died first anyway (update jk not dead hospitalized tho)

What’s with the creepy mask though, werewolf??

LMAO unrelated but the commercial I just watched was for Domino’s and this kid gets the notification that his pizza is on the way so he FLIES through town to get there for the delivery and I’m like @dominos marketing team when I order dominos it’s when I’m in bed in my undies too lazy to cook what is this unrealistic bs

LOL @ DEAN WINCHESTER LECTURING SOMEONE ELSE ON REPRESSION

“batsignal” “Hogwarts” nerd!sam at it again

And you can tell Mick is just like yeah ok yes hogwarts ha ha very funny

I love seeing Sam excited like that it’s so cute I genuinely see Sam in a role like that

Omg Dean’s scathing look when Mick says hunting “should be” his thing … I’ll prob write more about this later but here we have Dean who from childhood was expected to hunt and expected to give up literally everything in his life for it and for his family so that look right there was “how fucking dare you insinuate that you’re just gonna jump in on the Fun Hunting Time this isn’t a game this is our whole lives and people have died for this how dare you”

Can’t fault Mick wanting to be prepared though dude is probably scared af

Dean Winchester’s Guide to Hunting the Supernatural: Step 1: Put on a flannel

MICK AND SAM LISTENING TO PODCASTS I’M DEAD

aaaand here we have what I hope will be the fundamental fight of the season: BMoL believe all monsters are killing machines and Sam and Dean know that’s not true. Hhhhmmmmmmm…

I’m laughing I loved that bit from the commercial again and OMG DEAN RAVING ABOUT THE HOTEL AND HIS NUDIE MORNING SWIM FUCKING BLESS CHUCK DABB HONESTLY

@adoringjensen​ honestly I need to start a bitter!dean or petty!dean tag lmao I love this doofus

omg more sexy doctors for dean!!!

Ugh Mick first lesson don’t lie to your hunting buddies

YAAASS MAMA JODY I feel bad that Claire is lying to her though

Protective daddy!Dean is my fave and like I’m not thrilled about some skeezy guy (bartender? someone else? Unclear from dialogue) being grabby with Claire but I think it’s important to recognize that that would be a reality for female hunters, particularly someone young and lovely like Claire

Mick :( honey :( why :( I sincerely hope both the brothers tear him a new one for that

AAAAHHHHH DEAN QUESTIONING MICK ABOUT WHAT HE WAS DOING LAST NIGHT AND KNOWING HE’S BEEN LIED TO

YES DEAN THREATEN THAT SKEEZE who even gets a tribal tattoo on their neck that’s some High Level Fuckboy right there

FUCK I am living for this conflict rn this is a compelling plot thank you Dabb

Claire doesn’t know where she fits in and neither does Cas and I am beyond ready for them to sit down and talk about it

NNOOOOOO CLAIRE NO NO NO :(

YES SAM YELL AT HIM

okay no isn’t there a way to cure this??? I feel like they did that in an earlier season!

why is watching Sam And Dean On The Case™ so awesome

it’s THE OTHER BARTENDER

Good on Mick for figuring that out at least

kskdjajslfialdifjawlejasldkjasahwfotirueysidndjsksodifjdjjrndirueuwhsjwodofoieiejwhzjfkgk

AKDJFJDNANSKKTIRYGKFKFIRJDBDFDSAKJFLHWUAHLEIUHORIQWHEFKJANSJKSLSK

blessssss I’m so glad Claire is okay

cool dad dean and uncle sam got her back

CLAIRE CALLING JODY MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay overall that was good and I’m happy

Things I am excited about for 12x17

Mick/BMoL conflict! I really enjoy Adam Fergus and I’m so far really liking where the BMoL vs Winchester hunting conflict is going - whose side will Mick land on??

E I L E E N ! E I L E E N ! E I L E E N ! E I L E E N ! E I L E E N !

Things I am not excited about for 12x17

where is cas

why does Mary need to be in a sexual situation with a man! WHY! IT’S SO UNNECESSARY! YOU CAN HAVE FEMALE CHARACTERS/GUEST STARS WITHOUT THEM HAVING SEX WITH YOUR MALE LEADS! THAT’S A THING!!! uuuuuuggggggghhhhhh

Today was decent. Not particularly thrilling but nothing this week has been. Tomorrow is my last full day here and I'm having mixed feelings. Like part of me is kind of sad the trip is over already, but part of me also feels like I have been here for a while now and it just doesn't feel permanent to me, like it doesn't feel like home, it doesn't feel like my life. And I guess that's kind of sad given this is where my family lives, but it's just not my everyday, not where I always want to be. I want to be at work because I love my job, I want to be at school because as hard as law school is I so enjoy being there, I want to be at my church because the people there are amazing and I feel like I can connect with God without having to deal with all the righteous hypocrisy that plagues too many of the churches I've been to. That stuff is my life, and none of that is here. I feel guilty when I see things like my mom's post from yesterday though, like her worrying about me living so far away, and like, I don't want to make my mom sad of course, it's just....I don't know. It's complicated. Family stuff I'll maybe work out in therapy some day when I have the time and need to do so. But anyway. I woke up earlier than I have been and couldn't fall back asleep. I originally actually woke up at 5:39 am and couldn't fall back asleep but did after a while, then rewoke up at 10:39 am (I shit you not) and couldn't fall back asleep again, at which point I said fuck it and got out of bed. I was brushing my teeth in the bathroom and when I opened the door my brother jumped out and tried to scare me, and I jumped a little bit. I went downstairs and talked to my mom, and she suggested we go get food again lol because she likes going out with me, she said we could go to the same place again but I said 3 times in one week might be a bit much....so instead we settled on another cute breakfast place by us that also happens to be where I'm going with my cousin and brother tomorrow.....but hey, we don't have unlimited options here lol. So I go back upstairs to get changed, and wait outside my brothers door for like 10 minutes waiting for him to come out and jumped out at him, which was very much worth the wait. While I was waiting, our golden retriever who's not supposed to be upstairs but sneaks up there anyway pushed the door to my room open as it want closed all the way, then it drifted closed behind him and he couldn't get out and started barking.....crazy dog. So then I got changed and drove to the breakfast place. I was gonna get French toast or pancakes or something being that I pretty much always get something like that, but instead decided on getting an egg sandwich because my sister had one the other day and it looked really good, plus I'm going back there tomorrow so I can always try the other stuff then. And maybe I should try to eat less sugar because I eat a lot of sugar, lol. So I got a bacon egg and cheese on a roll sandwich (with a side of fruit) that was quite good, so we had a nice little meal. After that my mom wanted to stop at trader joes so we did that, and they were giving out samples of their caramel nut popcorn called "Rosencrunch and Guildenpop" and who can name that slightly obscure theatre reference?? I was sufficiently amused. While we were checking out we were about to get on one line when my mom saw someone she knew so she went to get online behind them and they're talking and going on, and the cashier and I are just like, standing there looking at each other like welp, lol. Of course later in the transaction my mom runs into ANOTHER person she knows, so that was even better, and the cashier and I are just like laughing at this point. Like I mentioned earlier, she was definitely flirting with me a bit and I didn't really mind lol. I mean, it's nice to have attention? Occasionally I'll wonder that if because I have short hair and don't always wear make up/sometimes wear not the most feminine clothes people might think I look like a lesbian, but it's not something I give that much thought to (okay that might be a little bit of a stretch, I give a decent amount of thought to it). It's just....complicated due to growing up in a ridiculously homophobic Christian environment and still having brothers who throw around words like "dyke" on a regular basis (like "I saw these two dykes at the bar the other day kissing") and it's just...strange for me at least. It doesn't carry over into my thoughts on anyone else, at all, it's just something that enters my mind more than I would like it to because it's really fucking stupid and I know I really shouldn't give a crap anyway......this is becoming an unnecessary rant that I'm probably not even explaining well enough, so I'm just gonna end that here. It's complicated. But anyway. So we had a nice little interaction before we left the store. After that my mom wanted to stop at marshalls and shop for a bit. Ever since I started needing business like clothing and have needed a good bit of it (this semester I'll be in business wear 3 days a week, last semester it was 4) I'm always trying to find different combinations and such, which makes me go kind of marshalls crazy because they have a ton of good stuff for that. I was mostly looking for solid color tops and solid color pants to match with my many patterned tops and pants, and also just to get more pants in general since it's getting cold now and being in a skirt is becoming less ideal. So I did quite a bit of damage in that area haha, they just have some really good stuff for that, so I got a bunch of cute solid color things and a few patterned things because I'm weak, okay? I did get a white sweater with black stars that look kind of drawn on and it's totally my *aesthetic* and I was very pleased with that lol. But we finished up there and headed home, and shortly after getting there my sister got home from school and wanted to go to chickfila because of course she did, so I took her there. I was still kind of full from my earlier meal, so I just got a yogurt parfait (with chocolate cookie crumbs, of course). So we sat and ate that did a while and it was nice. We started talking about movies a bit and decided we would watch 400 Days when we get back, so that's what we did. I probably made it worse for myself by reading the damn review that made it seem like the creepy zombie guy was like, the entire second half of the movie, instead of like in two stupid scenes. So when he showed up I started freaking out a bit lol and then he disappears so for the whole rest of the damn movie I'm like omg he's gonna pop out any second now and he does come back eventually and Brandon Routh's fucking character lets him out of the cage he was in because ??? Lol, but other than that it was a pretty good movie, not really scary but definitely thriller. The plot does seem kind of aimless at points, like it sets you up for a big reveal and then kind of just drops off. Brandon and Caity were freaking awesome in it though, Brandon's character was cracking me up because he starts it getting bailed out of jail for being in a bar fight and I'm just like....lol, definitely no Ray Palmer here. And he's talking about how upset he is that his girlfriend just dumped him, who we then find out is Caity's character, who's also going into the 400 day simulation with him and just two other people.....kind of awkward eh? Lol. And then we find out later (spoiler alert) the guy running the simulation told her she had to break it off with him if she wanted to do the mission because it wasn't the kind of data they wanted or some bs like that and his character gets really mad that she didn't tell him....and then Tom Cavanagh shows up for a while and his character is just like....???? What the hell are you doing here??? Very random lol but fairly entertaining. Then of course the end is like the thing goes off saying oh your simulation is done come outside we're all here to celebrate with you but they had just been outside and it was like this desolate wasteland with crazy people and moon dust, and then it's just the two of them and they hold hands and then it just ends without showing us what happens and I'm like......dude, you're killing me!! I don't like not knowing what happens, lol. But overall it was a pretty good movie that I enjoyed and I'm just gonna pray I don't get too many nightmares from it because that's usually what happens when I watch scary movies and I'm so not a fan. But anyway. After that we kind of skipped between a few different things, and watched like one song's worth of the recording of Shrek the musical (not my choice) but my sister eventually settled on what to expect when you're expecting, which we watched back in like 2013 when we were just binging rom-coms and she wanted to watch it again. I liked it again the second time around, I forgot wha happens with Anna Kendrick's character and that made me sad but otherwise it's a pretty well done and cute movie. After that I just hung out for a while but then went outside the back room to go sit in the living room with my parents because I was thinking about my mom's post yesterday and wanting to give her more time to see me, but it ended up not being a great idea because my dad started bitching over the person supposedly hassling Ivanka Trump on the plane and when I said the person covering it doesn't seem to care about the several Muslim families that have been harassed on planes since the election and he got all pissy and was like "that's not even relevant stop" and I was just like ????? I have no fucking clue how you live in your goddamn bubble where someone harassing Ivanka Trump on an airplane is the worst thing that's ever happened meanwhile minorities everywhere are being harassed and straight up abused, but that's not relevant?? Like no, shut up. So I made some comment about not knowing how much he could respect me anyway while voting for someone like that which I'm fairly sure pissed him off more but at that point I didn't even care because it was true anyway, there's a good chunk of my respect that he lost by voting for Trump that he's never going to be able to win back, and that's just how it is. So I was kind of pissy with him for the rest of the night, and then my sister basically had a teenager tantrum because my parents were saying this place she's decided she wants to have her sweet 16 is too far away and nobody will be able to come (and to be fair it's like, on the queens border, so at least an hour drive from us) but she was just not having it and it carried on for a while because even though she was being a brat they were also being obstinate about it and I was just like ffs she just wants to look at the place her sweet 16 isn't until goddamn October she can look at the place it's not gonna hurt anything and that was basically the conclusion they came to, but with a lot more unnecessary whining and such. Sigh, lol. I rarely actually get annoyed at my sister mostly because I just love her so much, and even when I can acknowledge she's acting like a brat (which she does sometimes) it doesn't really make me mad at her and I wasn't really annoyed with her tonight, so it was just whatever. And yeah, after that I just hung out for a bit before heading to get ready for bed, and that was my day. I have to be up in 9 hours now so I guess I'll be going to sleep now. Goodnight peeps. Happy weekend. And oh, no grades still. Sigh.