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jacksprostate · 1 month

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My boss invites me into his office, he's telling me, we've got a problem. It is always, "we." "We" are all in this together. "We" need to put a little more effort in, if "we" want our yearly bonuses. "We" have got to up profits by next quarter, or "we" are going to lose our jobs.

"We" don't all have half a million salaries and a three letter job title, but what can you do.

If you asked my boss, he'd tell you about his. The guy above him. Yeah, "we" are all beholden to him. My boss, he's just regional. Small fry, really.

I'm entering his corner office, big tall windows gaping, stretching the condo construction happening across the street for as far as the eye can see. He sees me looking.

"Perks of the job," he says. A little laugh in his voice. He's not funny.

"We need to talk about your performance last quarter," he says.

We, unto me.

I am Jack's rejuvenated individuality.

My boss had his secretary let me in, so really I've spent the past minute standing awkwardly, insomnia haze locking my gaze some place beyond our broken city horizon. My boss had his secretary let me in because that means he could sit at his desk and pretend to be doing something important. Wave me in, make me wait, give him the opportunity to boast about his jail cell amenities.

You'd think it makes him feel powerful, the way he's clinging to it all. I tongue at the hole in my cheek as I take a seat. Managerial threat displays have lost their effect on me, I think.

It makes him antsier. I can see it, taste it like the blood in my mouth. Oh, iron. Oh, fear.

If Tyler was here, he'd lean on those windows and get them splotched with dirt and worse. Those windows, they're spotless because my boss pays into the building fund with company money to get an old spanish speaking lady to wipe the glass clean before he arrives each morning. I saw her once, at a support group for some combination of cancer and impoverishment. She coughed, introducing herself. Said she couldn't speak well, but wanted company. She has to keep working, but it's making her sick.

The building doesn't pay her enough that she can buy PPE in between their scant offerings, so she's without a mask most of the times I've seen her.

Truthfully, there's been someone else under the building's thumb for a while now.

I found a different group for Thursday nights.

I still think I'll hear Rosa's wheezing when I see her cart by the restrooms.

My prolonged silence, it's unnerving him now, so he's puffing up like a bluffing frog.

I am still with my boss, and I've been staring at a damp spot of drywall behind his head as he yaps at me about how I need to follow dress code. Raise my numbers. Be more engaged.

I should be a precious bouquet of flowers, brightening up the office.

He just wants to help me out. Get me back on track. We used to have amazing figures coming out of Compliance and Liability, my one-man department.

If Tyler was here, he'd be filling the janitor's Windex bottles with 90 proof and blue dye instead, so when my boss comes in early for once in his life and spooks Rosa's replacement, the bottle gets spilled all over my boss and his carpet and his desk and then my workplace smoking habit really would be a fire hazard.

I tune back in, and my boss is informing me that it's with his sincerest regrets that he has to tell me that I won't be getting my bonus this year, oh, maybe something if I shape back up, yeah, he's sure he could fight upper management for me if I showed a good effort. He just wants to help, but I have to help him help me.

Whatever is going on in my life, it's got to be over.

I imagine going to Tyler. Going to fight club. Saying, let's pack it up boys. Fight club's over. I need to sit pretty for my boss so he can feed me a quarter of the salary he always conveniently has to withhold each year, due to all sorts of things impacting the car industry. A typhoon hit mainland China. The US dollar grew too fast with the collapse of the Soviet Union. A sparrow chirped in Belgrade on a Wednesday.

The usual.

Fight club's over. I've got to go be a recall campaign coordinator full time. Working hours, waking hours, what's the difference?

Tyler is always telling me, I could follow my boss home, and when he goes to work on his stupid meaningless hobby in the nice little air conditioned shed at the edge of his two acre two storey home, I could lock him in with nothing but millet. And when he runs out of millet, I could drag his body out and drown him in his pool, laced with armagnac, just like the French do it. And I could pluck and roast the corpse and eat it uncovered, hoping God has no choice but to see me now.

Or I could just give him a poisoned bottle of whiskey.

There's many options, according to Tyler.

The thing is. The truth is, I like my boss.

It's Tyler who wants to come in in the early morning and when my boss pushes open the door to his office, it's Tyler who wants to have a block of concrete in a bucket fall down and crack his skull like a rotten egg, looney tunes style.

It's not me. I gave my boss soap for the mandatory holiday office gift exchange.

I tell my boss, thank you for the concern.

Unfortunately, my grandmother's diagnosis seems dire, and it's unlikely I'll be able to switch gears before the year rolls over in March. Apologies.

He looks at me, and my battered face, at stitches painted across my temple. I can tell, he wants to shake me. Demand from me, why I can't I even pretend to give him a real excuse? Why do I have to make his life so very difficult? Why can't I just keep the broken toddlers from coming out of the woodwork with a smile on my face?

But he doesn't. He says, my condolences. It sounds a lot like get the hell out of my office.

With that in mind, I get up and take a nice, long moment to watch nothing through his huge, sparkling windows. Papers conspicuously rustle. There's the ambient noise of pointless keyboard clicking. I take a sip of my coffee. Behind me, my boss starts to pretend to get a call in hopes it gets me to move on, and I'm watching construction crews like ants. Perks of the job, indeed.

#fight club #my writing #needed to write smth without any goals #it is. like a very nice doodle to me #hope it's good :)

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randoimago · 5 months

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Hi, not sure if this counts toward your no-crossover rules but can I have Megumi, Gojo, Maki and Noritoshi with a rival reader who is like Gai from Naruto?

If not then just them with a rival relationship with the reader.

With a Rival Reader

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Character(s): Satoru Gojo, Noritoshi Kamo, Make Zenin, Megumi Fushiguro

Type of Request: Headcanons

Note(s): Reader having the personality of a character from another fandom is exactly why I have the no crossover rule in place (I kept getting tons of asks for Reader with various personalities with characters that it started feeling unoriginal and a bit boring to write).

I will be happy to write the second one for you though!! Also, it wasn't mentioned if Reader is supposed to be an S/O or not so these are mostly Platonic

Gojo

Oh this cocky piece of shit can't help but laugh when he hears that you consider yourself his rival, because he certainly doesn't. He has only known one person that he'd count as a rival and that person is long gone.

Sure, go ahead and keep training and pushing yourself to be stronger. He likes the idea of being used as motivation for you to push yourself (probably makes jokes about you being obsessed with him or smth)

Of course, when he does realize that you do have a similar power level to him, that's when things get interesting. Gojo has very specific goals and way of thinking and so he'll definitely want to get you on his side at least. It'd be fun for the strongest two people to pair up and scare the rest of the higher ups shitless.

Maki

She likes the motivation you give her to get stronger. Not that she needed much motivation from you, but it's a good way for her to access her own strengths compared to someone else.

So long as your rivalry is just as jujutsu sorcerers then she can deal with it. Don't mess with her chances with the Zenin clan though.

If you try to be her rival in other aspects (relationships, for example) then she doesn't get it. Now, if you bring up Yuta then she'll start getting flustered and fight you about it.

Megumi

He doesn't even realize that you view him as a rival. Megumi is mostly focused on himself and getting better with his own abilities. It isn't until you challenge him and actually call yourself his rival out loud that he gets it.

Is a tiny bit amused that you'd declare yourself as his rival when he didn't even view you as such previously. He isn't trying to insult you, his focus just wasn't on you (which still sounds a bit insulting).

Honestly, your "rivalry" ends up with you interacting with Itadori and Nobara a lot which just causes more exhaustion for him since now there's someone else's antics to deal with.

Noritoshi

Doesn't even view you as his rival (this time it is an insult, unlike with Megumi). Noritoshi has very personal goals in mind and he's not going to compete with someone that knows nothing about him.

You can be his rival all you want, but he's not going to acknowledge you. Noritoshi works and does as his clan says. Accepting your challenges or rising to any taunts you have isn't going to happen (unless you mention his mom then he might kill you).

And yet, as much as he claims you aren't his rival, he can't help but be jealous and upset with you. You're able to just casually call yourself his rival without a care in the world. He would love to be able to have the freetime to play along with you, but he doesn't because he has to continue to pretend to be a good boy for his clan if he wants to build a home for his mother to come back.

#Anonymous #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #noritoshi kamo x reader #noritoshi x reader #megumi x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader #satoru gojo x reader #gojo x reader #maki zenin x reader #maki x reader

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blackstarchanx3new · 10 months

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FSR rambles PT 2

More stuff I like about my own comic (Head cannons about why stuff is the way it is too)

So like, yeah Vio had a panic attack. He’s relatable to me. UwU (I write shit I can relate too. Lmao. Deal with it. X’D)

Also Vaati’s curse: Dark Link, I won’t say too much about his “Powerset” or what he does since most of yall can deduce so far what he “Can” do atm.

Smth about Vio/the four swords gang that has always struck me is:

HOW EXACTLY ARE THEY SPLIT UP? (Not physically, I think they’re magical bodies and Link’s body is somewhere in the spiritual realm but that’s a head cannon)

Like, it’s not just “They reflect emotions” that breaks down after Blue and Red. Anger and “sad/emotional” respectively. Green’s like a weird husk of the original Link. (Like…Idk he basically acts like any other Link in any other manga but bland. X’D which is why I gave him depression in FSR. He's infamously the most under- memed character in FS. He’s effectively bootleg/dollar store Link. Worse without the other 4 and bare bones Link by himself. Flavorless Link if you would. Watered down fountain soda because you added too much ice Link.)

Vio, at least, is really hard to pin down what part of the link he IS. (At least imo)

Let’s break down Vio’s traits:

At the start of the manga, he’s selfish, lowkey, rude/blunt, the ‘Smart” one (All of them are smart in their own ways tho so that’s not ALL.) He’s cunning, manipulative, rather cold, and generally “Negative” traits.

I think he’d be insecure about that. Identity crisis. Because well, he IS mostly “negative” traits. Or at least ones that are SEEN as negative and it’s obvious to ME at least, he feels alienated from the other 3. He comes off as lacking empathy too.

Basically: Vio’s own moral ambiguity makes him very uncomfortable. Because there’s no outrunning it.

This frame is fun, because Vio was reaching for his sword which, because he’s in the “Headspace” , wasn't there. But as Shadow Link mentions later, Vio was reaching for it in reality too.

I’ve gone on my rant, but imo this was a bold faced LIE. X’D

WHY DID YA DROP THE SWORD THEN FUCKER???

Lol so this is a headcanon:

But basically: Why the hell would Vio formulate a plan with Shadow Link (One that even guarantees Zelda's safety as if he was REALLY trying to make it work…), just to drop it in favor of a “Quicker” solution?

He was uncomfortable as hell by Shadow Link’s confession, so decided “Yup, mirror shattering time.” Emotions make him uncomfortable. Especially Shadow Link’s because the very act of manipulating Shadow Link is very Un-heroic of him.

He couldn’t play the long game because it made him realize his own “Failings” as a hero, but that was the OG plan after gathering his thoughts in the woods. (At least to me.)

Infiltrate/get friendly with Shadow Link, find out who or what is behind Vaati after learning of “Gannon”, destroy Vaati, save Zelda and defeat Gannon.

He went with Mirror shattering because: 1. It makes the most logical sense. Cut off Gannon’s power supply AND destroy Vaati. Shadow link is an unfortunate victim but “It’s worth it”

I find it funny BLUE is said to be the one who’s “Willing to do anything to win” When I feel that is WAY more applicable to Vio. X’D Bitch was willing to do a LOT to save Zelda and defeat Vaati. And...similar to how he states at the beginning of the manga "Team schmeam I don't need any help". He goes off to invade the enemies ranks ALONE.

Art wise the Vaati wings on Dark link block out and make fire lol. Which I imagine makes Vio uncomfortable after that whole “Almost getting burned alive from lava” thing.

This is smth brought up in the twilight princess manga, which is fun because Vio’s outfit is very similar to that Link’s. X’D

The weight of being a hero and it's title being a heavy burden for whoever is "Link" at the time.

Now that Vio isn’t “The hero” doing something towards a hero goal, “Who the fuck is he?” FSR is kinda a thing where it's like "Okay sure Vaati's here...but he's like...a non issue lmao" they're kinda aimless. Who are they if not THE HERO. LINK.

Hahahaha

Okay these frames are so pretentious but here we go:

Dark Link is literally his insecurities being suffocating. X’D

Specifically: Considering Shadow’s words and his status as a hero.

Also all the eyeball imagery, so many people watching him fail/judging him.

Fun things art wise: Human teeth are scary as fuck.

I like the panel where Dark Link hugs him. Because an embrace can either be VERY UNCOMFORTABLE or very comforting depending on the context. Here it is very much NOT a comforting hug.

Also side note: Dark Link might come off as “Confusing” as a character…He’s very INTERESTING as the series goes on.

Vio snapped out of it but he’s still ain’t okay lol. Shadow Link didn’t hear Dark Link’s part of the “conversation” so he really just heard Vio mumbling utter nonsense. That would be scary as hell. Especially when he’s reaching for his weapon like dayum I’d cry too Shadow.

~Shadow Link blames himself~

He still feels like he’s on eggshells around Vio, he's aware their relationship atm isn't very stable.

Lol so this is some of that sexy “Character development” i keep joking about with Shadow Link.

He’s still a creature of darkness but he cares very deeply about Vio.

Lol so smth you may notice is how: I fucking love how SINCERE Shadow Link is as a character. Like bro puts on a spooky act, but he’s just a sweet little guy that wants friends and he’s super open with his feelings. (I think he was just talkin’ his feelings in the woods too but that’s a head cannon. X’D He’s so weirdly soft with Vio out in the woods like…Bro)

It was a trait that bit him in the ass as a villain but I think that it shows that he is a good boy on the inside.

Lol so we all know how much Shadow Link hates pity, he doesn’t pity Vio, he emphasizes. And i think bro just really wanted to be hugs (HE’S SO TOUCH STARVED LMAO)

Even lines like “They’re all a big happy family in the dark world” (Paraphrased) show to me Shadow just REALLY wants a support system/family/SOMEONE he can rely on. X’D

So he says shit he wishes someone had said to him.

Also he hasn’t been able to physically HOLD someone in 7 years, Shadow Link misses physical touch like crazy.

Hug didn’t work lol.

Vio’s still frazzled.

I fucking love Shadow Link’s face “CURSE WHA-” like Vio’s really talking utter nonsense and it’s kinda funny ngl.

Vio didn't mention Dark Link so, to Shadow Link: Vio brought this up just because he's spiraling atm.

*cough cough* “You’re guy’s house” *cough cough* he doesn’t consider it HIS house too…

Continues to apologize for…nothing. Ouch.

Still blames himself for setting Vio off- oof.

Lol. Everything Vio says in the library is very telling of how he feels the pressure to be the one to come up with a plan to fix things. Because “He’s the smart one”. Even when LITERALLY NO ONE has put said pressure on him to fix things as Blue and Green outright don’t wish to be Link again, and Red complained back in the headspace

*Dies* Shadow Link is best boy. He tries to hard. TTuTT

Also Vio continuously gripping Shadow Link because he wants Shadow Link close to him.

You can tell he isn’t trying to hug Vio anymore because that didn’t work lmao. He touches Vio a lot less and only in comforting ways (Patting his arm, his head, rubbing his arm ex), Vio’s actually the one who keeps pulling him closer.

Vio is correct here: He’s TECHNICALLY in no physical danger.

Dark link choking him in the headspace didn't do squat to him. It’s Vio’s own thoughts that are fucking with him.

Lol that statement is very bloated. Vio realized “Holy shit, he’s still here after EVERYTHING.”

The manipulation in the past, the panicking.

Shadow Link’s just, still there for him. He isn’t leaving, and shows no sign of wanting too.

100% accurate. Shadow has no obligation to be helping Vio rn in any way. At all. Especially after how Vio’s treated him. Shadow's even looking for books to help with the curse that MAY OR MAY NOT even be affecting Vio for all Shadow Link knows.

Cause Shadow link: Is cool.

Lol so he DOES wanna be touched.

Okay funny story about pages 63-65 : These look so sketchy because I literally was like “doing line art for these expressions would ruin them” So they’re sketches. X’D

About the panels themselves: Shadow Link’s response to getting thanked in the manga makes me think he REALLY wants to do good things and get complimented for them. So when Vio thanks him (Smth he didn’t expect) he gets embarrassed.

Vio is FINALLY HONEST WITH SOMEONE ABOUT HOW HE FEELS.

He can’t run from it anymore lmao. So he has no choice but to tell him.

Lmao funny story: OG draft Shadow Link laughed at the "I'm a bad person" line. X’D

I’m glad I cut it but it also would have been very funny because like…Objectively no. Vio you’re not a “typical” bad person. And from Shadow’s perspective Vio is anything BUT a “Bad” person. He’s the “Hero”.

While not directly apologizing, Vio does admit to feeling like utter shit for what he did. Which is, SOMETHING. “Sorry ma i goofed up” vibes. XD

Lol. Of course you don’t. Simp- I say as a joke. But fr, from Shadow's perspective, this is kinda a weird admission. Vio's "Naughty" if you'd word it that way- X'DDDDD

*Implodes*

Okay fr out of ANYONE he could have shape shifted into during the vaati fight…Shadow Link chose VIO.

We know he can look like Green, so…The choice to look like Vio was very…deliberate. X’D

Almost like he looks up to him or smth...

Vio being utterly bamboozled by this information. X'D "YOU WHAT!?"

Fun thing about this being a fan comic: I can make them explicitly gay. X’DDD SO THEY ARE.

And that's all for now. I might do more later with more pages. X'D

It's fun to just, go off about my own crap. Cause I only get to do that with my friends usually.

#four swords adventures #four swords manga #four swords #FSR rambles #loz fsr au #fs loz #Four Swords returns AU

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lovevalley45 · 4 months

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untitled ficlet #336

a/n: me writing smth that acknowledges that the legends are technically trapped in time prison indefinitely? it's more likely that u think. thank you to @supermothering for suggesting i should write some behrastra when i put out an open call for writing requests and letting me revisit this idea!

Astra hadn’t expected time prison to be so boring.

The technical term for the facility the Fixers had brought them to was not “time prison”, really. Rather, it was “Council of Fixed Point Determination Facility for Re-Education and Rehabilitation of Temporal Offenders”, as the Fixers had informed them when bringing them in. But time prison was much less clunky.

Upon arrival, they’d split them up and slapped a magic dampener on her wrist. Astra would have taken it more personally if they hadn’t taken Behrad’s air totem and Spooner’s gun, as well as finding about a dozen knives on Sara’s person. Where they were all hiding, that was unclear.

The only saving grace was that in the splitting up, she and Behrad had gotten thrown in the same cell. It was just big enough to fit a bunk-bed and a table, with a door that only led to a tiny bathroom. It seemed completely walled in. But she knew that one of the walls was a face, occasionally becoming transparent enough that they could see the rest of the building they were in.

Without the whole team together, it was hard to plan. But the two of them had already cracked what would be the first step of any attempt at a breakout. That is, if they could actually pull it off.

“What’s the verdict?” Astra asked as Behrad took a look at the anti-magic cuff. They were huddled up on the bottom bunks, as tucked out of sight as they could be. It was a little nice, her back against his chest. The knowledge that there were guards that could easily peer in and see them was not so nice.

He pried out the bamboo fork from their meal that he had been using to try and examine the inside. “No dice. Until I can get something that isn’t made of bamboo, we need the actual key to unlock it.” He dropped her wrist back into her lap. “Whatever tech they’re using is more advanced than Ray’s anti-nanite tech. But more fragile, so there’s always brute force.” As she looked at the cuff, considering it, he quickly added, “If you’re fine with breaking your wrist.”

She groaned. “Damnit.” She squeezed her hand into a fist. “You think I could make a run for it if they tried to take me to the medbay here?”

“I’d prefer to not have to watch you break your wrist,” Behrad told her.

“Alright, I get it.” She flexed her hand. “This blows. We spend half a year trying to get back to our ship and the moment we can go back to time travel we get arrested.”

“At least, we’re stuck together.”

She closed her eyes as she pressed her head against him. “Behrad, you’re great and all, but stuck is still stuck.”

“I’m not saying it’s perfect.” Astra felt him shrug. “At least we aren’t stuck sharing a cell with the guy who stole our ship.”

“I admire your attempts to look on the bright side here.”

“Yeah, if I don’t, I’ll be freaking out,” he admitted. “Focusing on trying to crack that lets me get my mind off things a little.”

Astra wasn’t the type to freak out, but she could understand that. With a goal, it was harder to dwell on their situation. “It’s not your fault that they gave us bamboo forks.”

“They are better for the environment than plastic,” he muttered. “How are you doing?”

“It’s weird to be without my magic. Not even for being able to get out, but just-” she sighed. “Another level of feeling powerless.”

The Fixer’s stipulation had been that she could get it off if she was “good.” Astra figured that breaking her wrist to run off was not a case of good behavior. In a way, it reminded her of her first few days on the Waverider. Outnumbered and, once again, trapped in a cell.

At least, then, she’d been able to get a sweet taste of temporary revenge.

Behrad wrapped his arms around her, pulling her a little closer. She still felt drained from rebuilding the Waverider and just wanted to drift off to sleep in his warmth. As he rested his cheek against her curls, he said, “I don’t know how helpful the Air Totem would have been compared to your magic. But I got used to having the ancestors and the other Zari always with me.”

“You’ve got me,” Astra said.

“Is it a bad time to realize this is the most privacy we’ve had since we got together?”

She laughed. “We had that date in the manor when we were ‘retired’.”

“Okay, but everyone has keys to the manor and could’ve strolled in whenever they want.” Behrad lifted his head. “We just have the wall where Fixers may or may not be watching us.”

“Do they think we’re scheming or just cuddling?” Astra asked.

“Are we still scheming?”

She looked up at him. “I think we might have stopped scheming when you told me I couldn’t break my wrist.”

He shrugged again. “Alright. Maybe we did.”

“But I wouldn’t mind staying like this for a while,” she confessed.

“Me neither.”

However, as he rested his head against hers again, the not-a-wall faded from opaque to transparent. Astra scrambled out of his arms like they’d been caught doing more than cuddling as a pair of the Fixers who’d arrested them accompanied a man in what she assumed was the futuristic equivalent of Ava’s old Time Bureau pantsuits.

“I’m, uh, sorry to interrupt your recreation time,” he said. “But it’s time for your first re-education session.”

Great. Another fun aspect of time prison.

As the Fixers came in to restrain them, she shot a look at Behrad.

Not for the first time, she was grateful that they weren’t stuck here on their own. And she was sure it wouldn’t be the last time.

#alli writes shit #legends of tomorrow #behrastra #behrstra #astra logue #behrad tarazi #i think the angsty serious instinct is still strong within me but it's fluffy enough lol

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some-of-us-watch-the-sunset-too · 1 year

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do you do any character x reader? if so, can you do the boys with a S/O who wants to be famous?

i don’t have many ideas for this, but i’ll see what i can do!

Darry

i think he would be supportive but he’d also keep you grounded, yk like he’d tell you “there’s a lot of hard work that goes into achieving these things, they don’t just happen overnight”

following my other point, he’d help you out a lot. i could see you guys staying inside some Saturday making vision boards and planning out what you need to do to achieve each goal

if you wanted to be a singer or something, he would encourage you to preform in bucks. even if nobody was listening, it would help you get more comfortable preforming in front of people

Ponyboy

I think he would be very supportive because I personally hc that he wants to be an author, I mean he did write the book itself, it makes sense!

You two would probably spend hours lying in the lot talking about the future, talking about when you’re famous. The rest of the gang would call you both crazy, but it doesn’t bother either of you.

Since he’s younger, although he knows the score, I still think he doesn’t realise just how much work goes into fame, or the downsides of it.

Sodapop

This man is 100% on board with you. For goodness sake he probably wants to be your agent or something!

If you want to be a singer or a musician, he’s making you do private concerts for him. If you want to be an actor, he’s getting ponyboy to write a script for you two to act out together (even though he normally can’t keep a straight face). Soda is doing everything to help you.

Part of him thinks he’s holding you back though, which is why he tries to help so much. If you do end up moving to keep up with your career, he’s encouraging you to, but he’s telling you to leave him behind. so you’re gonna have to remind him just how much you love him, and that without him you probably wouldn’t have gotten as far as you have

Dally

In all honesty? I don’t think he’d be supportive. I’m a firm believer in soft Dallas, but i just can’t see him supporting you if you wanted to be famous. It’s nothing against you, he just doesn’t believe it could happen to anyone. (listen, he’s lost all faith in the world, do you really think he believes anyone can achieve their dreams??)

Although, if you want to be a singer, he’d book you a gig in bucks. He does believe that it’s as far as you’ll ever go though.

You two might get into a few arguments over it. He lived in New York for a long time, he’s seen the people that wanted to be famous and ended up unhappy, working as a waitress or something. he doesn’t want that for you.

Johnny

Honestly i think he’d be the same as Ponyboy except that he doesn’t want to be famous.

Since i just love to write angst for Johnny i think he’d make you promise that you won’t forget him. That you’ll bring him with you if you’re leaving Tulsa.

Two-bit

This man can’t take anything seriously. he’d probably make jokes like “somebody stop those crows” when you’re singing. But it’s all just for jokes and if you tell him it upsets you, he’ll stop.

He’s completely supportive and would go to all your gigs, even if he was bored or tired or smth

Ok hear me out, yk “groupies” (a fan of a rock group who usually follows the group around on concert tours) thats two-bit, or at least what he calls himself. Seriously he’s like your own personal cheerleader. let’s be honest he’d also be like a freaking bodyguard

Steve

I’m not so sure about whether Steve would be supportive or not- i think he’d very much so think that people only get famous if they’re in the big city, it just doesn’t happen for people like him and the gang.

i also think that he just doesn’t understand why someone would want to be famous. All that attention just isn’t for him.

Maybe he’d be more supportive if you wanted to be a football player or something. He thinks that it’s based on your skill rather than talent or luck.

#the outsiders #the outsiders x reader #the outsiders x yn #darry curtis #ponyboy curtis #dallas winston #johnny cade #sodapop curtis #steve randle #two-bit mathews #the outsiders x ponyboy

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spotsupstuff · 10 months

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Your OCS are so interesting and deep! How do you write their story? What inspires you?

thank you! n pfuuuuuu uhhhhhhh

considering that before all of this i was like "egh, fandom ocs, whatever, its like 2/50 that manage to catch my attention. and the last time i made smth so oc focused was when i was around 13, stuff is just not for me" i don't really know how i'm doin all of this!

writing big elaborate stories spanning ideally multiple decades to even centuries is smth that i do in basically every fandom i join with my whole heart, but that usually then revolves around canonical characters and (usually) the character dynamics already present there. i just kind of try to boost them in a direction that feels nice for me

how i'm managing to write an original story from basically a weak chicken scratch (specifically so considering i'm not looking at canon super hard for inspirations) is beyond me. it was all supposed to be originally just Fish and the Seafarer's family just kind of fucking around without much of a clear goal, after all!

but when it comes to writing stories and characters in general, i'mma tell you what my dad told me. "write what you know," a typical good advice, but then he added: "and what you know is your feelings. write about your feelings, From your feelings."

i am not smart with politics, i haven't lived through revolutions. i don't know this no matter how much i read on it. but i know what it means to be hurt by someone and wanting to right it. fight it. i analyze the feelings that jump at me from somewhere inside because of hearing a song and reading the wiki article of Joan of Arc. i relate it to the times i've been harmed. i take those feelings and use them as a fuel for Zephyr's creation

i know what it means to love someone so much you'll claw through the worst fucking depressive thoughts needling you to do the most horrid thing, just so you can ensure they won't have to go through the pain of mourning you. the raw feeling of a need to live for someone else. i remember so well what it felt like when i fell in love within a hug. what worry and fear i felt when i went to confess to the person who's now my dear partner- i've never been such a mess before. i know what i feel when he barges in through the door, squeals at me and gives me a kiss on the nose. i take all of that and lend it to Euros and Sparrows

the most engaging stories happen when you put a truthful piece of yourself into the characters, in my opinion. i don't know everything in the world, but i am capable of identifying what i feel, when and most of the time why too. nobody can dispute my inner processing with any fact on this whole planet. and this unshakeable truth then shapes and inspires what i make. it breathes life into the characters

#Spot says stuff #the story is snaking in whichever direction- Sparrows wasnt a proper character till like a week after the big oc post hit n ya people-#-started showing interest in her and Euros' possible story. what matters is that ill put in there smth that means a lot to me and makes me-#-happy. we can figure the logistics later this comes first. this is also why i am very protective of the whole 'im doing this for the-#-happiness not the lore correctness.' we wouldnt have Any of this if i wasnt putting that first and foremost #see- people often approach characters as dolls n do stuff like 'cant wait to put this little man blorbo thru So much angst >:)))' and like!#you Can do that sure! who am i to stop you? but to me- in my opinion in my way- i think one should treat the characters as their friends #thats actually how im approaching pebbles! i am Specifically going out of my way to think of him as a friend when i do stuff with him

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mebiselfandi · 9 months

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meb how dare you.... now u need to write it or else😠😤 https://www.tumblr.com/mebiselfandi/723827018401267712/meanwhile?source=share

Skskdjdj hi nonnie😭

I’m too sick rn to write a whole fic but I wrote you a lil smth smth 🫶

It had been an hour since Leo’s match ended. Was it too soon to call? Neymar continued to pace before finally sitting down. He turned the phone over and over again. Maybe he should text him again. It felt desperate but then so did he.

Before he could contemplate any further, his hands had already made the decision for him. 1 ring, 2 rings. A part of him wished he wouldn’t pick up. Give him an ‘at least I tried’ cop out rather than face Leo’s unbridled happiness. 3 rings, 4 rings.

“Hey!” He said. Too loud and too eager. Lucky for him Leo barely seemed to notice.

“Hey,” he said. Neymar could hear the smile on his face.

Not having expected him to pick up at all, Neymar felt whatever courage had clouded his mind and possessed him to call the other man on a whim slowly begin to dissipate.

“I saw your match.” He closed his eyes, recounting Leo’s steps, his passes, his goal. He hadn’t seen him that happy in ages.

“Yeah?” Leo sounded excited at the opportunity to discuss his debut. “What did you think?”

Neymar couldn’t very well start spewing how he thought Leo should be playing with him. How that team didn’t deserve him. How much he missed him. Why he was so happy without him.

“The team needs work but I think you’ll get there.” It felt forced, calculated. ‘I miss you’ he thought.

“We have a far way to go but the kids here have a lot of talent.” Leo paused, thinking quietly. “It’s amazing.” He sounded bashful.

“What is?”

“Miami. It’s so…different.”

Neymar knew what Leo really meant. Where Paris had persecuted him and threatened him, Miami had welcomed him with open arms.

“Are you happy?” He gripped the phone tight in anticipation.

The silence stretched, Neymar almost thought the other man had ended the call.

“Yeah,” he finally crackled through.

A tear dropped. Neymar quickly wiped it away. Was he a cruel person for praying Leo would say he’s unhappy? Was he so evil to wish him misery for leaving him behind in Paris? ‘I want you to come back and be happy with me’ he felt like saying. Was he truly so selfish?

“Ney?” So soft laced with that same concern Neymar was so used to.

“Then I’m happy for you,” he smiled, artificial and spun out of faux pride.

Leo seemed to buy it though, sighing softly on the other end of the line.

“Great.” He huffed. “I was worried.”

“Worried?” He pulled gently on his earrings, fidgeting with the small studs and hoops that lined his lobe. “About what?”

“You.”

Neymar was sure he’d be struck down, smited and eviscerated for wishing him ill. How could he? Whatever small voice still urging him to beg Leo to leave them and come back muffled out as his yearning was replaced with guilt.

“Don’t worry about me. I’m okay.”

He wouldn’t tell him he missed him or that he should be there with him. It wouldn’t be fair to him. To either of them.

“Anyways, I have to go. I’ll talk to you later?”

“Yeah. Oh and Leo?”

“Yes?”

“I l…” he started, barely above a whisper, “have fun.”

He was sure the other man was adorning that soft smile he always wore when he talked to him.

“Thanks.”

The line cut. Leo’s caller ID flashed once before his screen switched off.

‘I miss you’ he allowed himself to think one last time before pushing away what he could of Leo out of his mind. It was easier to forget than to live with the knowledge that Leo truly was gone.

#the kids there have no talent /j #missed his second match actually cause I got the schedules mixed up #meb writes #neymessi fic #neymessi #leo messi #neymar #anon asks🥰

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jovenshires · 7 months

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im glad youre giving he said baby its flowers bc i think thats my favorite work of yours! that being said id love to know 5, 6, and 11 for it!

AWWW thank you!! i think it's mine too - though i do hold a special love in my heart for right side, there's smth ab he said baby that just gives everything i've ever wanted to give <333

5: What part was hardest to write?

oooh... probably the end!! i wasn't quite sure where to leave off - i didn't know if i wanted them to Talk About It afterward, but i thought it was better to leave tommy to his own devices and anything that happened after up to the imagination <3

6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

this fic is SO. okay so i really wanted a fic that just... captured a snapshot of domesticity, you know? i've touched on domestic intimacy in all my fics but i really wanted like. True intimacy. taking care of someone just because you love them. and i feel like this fic encapsulates that entirely. there is technically an end goal to this fic, the accidental love confession, but it doesn't really get resolved in any way so it feels incidental. like this is just a day in their lives, one where spencer needed to be taken care of and tommy was there to do it. anyway it's just my ideal relationship summed up into a fic so it's really important to me ya know.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

i am unashamed to say i love a lot about this fic <3333 but to me the dialogue just sounds so much like them... saying so much without saying a lot, you know? it's playful and silly but still tender and soft... yeah. the dialogue is why i really put it on a pedestal as one of my faves ever <3

send me fic asks!

#ask #asks #anon #anonymous #he said baby #hsbtwhcm #hsb #fic #what is my tag for that fic i cant remember JLNDNLKFK

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littlemissmanga · 1 year

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it makes me so nervous me as someone who Wants 2 write in the future but doesnt rlly know how or have much of the talent or skill that other ppl have that, on the chance i actually get published that it’ll be bad & ppl might think im just trying to appeal to the market or part of the right circles or smth :( which ik is such a nonissue but i rlly dont want to upset actually talented writers

In my 13 years on this site, you're my first anon. Thank you for reaching out!

First, let me start with this: NO writer you consider "talented" (a subjective moniker at best) will ever be upset that someone else is starting out, even if they're working through the same bumps we all do at first. This isn't the hunger games and there are no winners. There's always room at the table for a new friend with new ideas, new ways to express themselves, and new ways to explore the stories that are important to us.

Writing is a skill. Just like learning a new language or cooking. No one is born knowing what to write. Sure, some people naturally have a more discernable palate or pic up languages easier. And some people have a natural grasp on grammar and the rhythm of words. But you can still be a great writer without that. it just takes a bit of work.

Writing is also scary. You know the story you want to tell, and when you're just starting out (which is the first time you start any new writing project, no matter how many have come before it) it may be that nothing you put to page will sound the way you imagined in your head.

It's frustrating and disheartening. But my best advice is to just keep going just for yourself. When you're getting it down into paper/screen for the first time, you're writing for you. What you imagined is so important to you, it deserves to be made real through writing.

So don't think about what readers will think - of the prompt, the prose, the dialog, or the characters. Don't worry about syntax or diction, just get what you need to express out of your mind to a place where you can examine it.

Then, give yourself time and space. It's OK to edit and re-edit. To polish a section only to cut it later because as much as you like it, it doen't actually fit what your end goal is. Don't think about it in terms of what's popular or well-liked. Just think about "Does this serve the story I want to tell?" "Is my blorbo behaving in a way that serves their character and the plot? If not, why and how can it be adjusted?"

Over time, you'll see a growth in your writing. You may also see a regression in your writing from time to time. I'm going through that right now. That just reveals an area you need to focus on more.

It's up to you whether you want to share those early attempts or not. And be prepared - you'll never really feel your writing is "ready." But rather your excitement over sharing it with others who enjoy the media/characters/writing will overwhelm your anxiety.

And it's ok to be selective with who reads your writing, especially if it's early. Select strangers on the internet you don't know so you can remain anonymous. Find online workshops and share there. Select friends you can trust to give you only constructive critiques, rather than subjective analysis if that helps at first. Don't shy away from true help, but it's ok to share with people you know will inherently be supportive.

And if it helps, I'll offer to be your first stop :) I can't wait to see what stories you have in your heart.

#writing is a journey #there's a destination but no time limit #just take your first step #and the rest will follow

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dissociation-plus · 2 years

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if nothing is worth living for, why does everyone seem to act and pretend like it is?

the amount of times i’ve been told that “life is worth living” and “you just gotta find smth you’re passionate abt”… is insane. many ppl who say those things need to realise that it’s not like that for everyone.

just abt everything i love — and genuinely love and care for — is just not even worth it. like, yes, waterfalls are beautiful, so are bunnies. yes, i love my family so so much. yes, i love to write, sing and make music and more. and yes, i have a bucket list, and have many hopes, dreams and life goals.

…but none of it gives me any more of a reason or will to live. none of it makes me love life any more than i do — and even if it does, i just… don’t really care to be alive.

i don’t care if i don’t achieve any of my life goals and/or dreams. i don’t care if i have an entire list of things i wanna do before i “kick the bucket.” i love and care for my family, but ik they’ll be better off without me in the long run bc of all the issues i bring abt.

i just… don’t care for life.

P.S. i’m NOT looking for sympathy. all i want to point out is that even if someone has passions, dreams, goals, family, friends, etc… it isn’t always enough to make someone want to stay in this world or “love life” like others happen to! <3

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musashi · 1 year

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You know, I think IF part of me sees you as a healer not because of some 'softness', but in the sense that you enjoy the act of and experience of working to heal people, from what you've expressed. A healer in the sense that you have the patience and know-how to try and find ways to make people feel better when they are sick. If you had healing powers, it would be in the same being as having an endless surplus of teas and remedies and cold rags and warm soups. The forcing someone to take their bitter tasting syrup because otherwise their throat will take longer to get better. Or maybe in the sense of showing without much fear how you have healed yourself, like a goal or proof that one can pop back up. Some medicines are or come from poisonous sources, no? (Ugh, hope that doesn't come off as babying, I sometimes ramble to explain my thought process.)

UGHHHH I GUESSSSS but its just likeeeee i feels like a misunderstanding of WHY i'm like that like

i'm supposed to be a knight. im supposed to be a knight with a sword in my hands and i'm supposed to be fightng monsters for people

but i live in the modern age and monsters cannot be slain with blades. so i fight smaller monsters. like the pile of trash my friend needs taken out. or the hunger they're too tired to cook to combat. or my co worker who needs a hand lifting something heavy. or, yknow. germs.

i just happen to also have a special interest in stuff like microbiology and immunology and virology and all the other relevant ologies...... so when it comes to smth like that i am more passionate and precise. i'm good at fixing sick people because it's something i just kinda study in my free time, and also the thing i am fixated on writing/drawing/whatever.

but that's not who i am. that's what i like. it's a little disheartening to just be reduced to my hobbies/interests when i'm a whole person behind all that, is all? idk if i am making ANY sense.

[OPERATION: help me figure out why the fuck a bunch of people assigned me healing magic on some reblog meme]

#wendy answers #Anonymous #nothing here comes across as babying. i like lots of words and explanations #they help me understand #as long as you treat me like an adult youre fine #if im asking for help understanding something its not babying to answer me

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yayaallegrinha · 2 months

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i was reading yesterday the book TEACHER YES; AUNT, NO:LETTERS TO WHOEVER DARES TEACHINSTITUTRICE - Paulo freire and he said:

" Thinking about the intimate relationship between thinking, reading and writing and the need that we have to live this relationship intensely, I would suggest to anyone who wants to rigorously try it, at least three times a week, to give yourself the task of write something. (...) Nobody writes if they don't write, just as nobody swims if they don't swim. "

With that in mind im writting today... in english. See, I love writting about the world and about certain themes like why should the goverment spend money on education or the way of achieving a democratic way of living (I know this stuff in "boring" okay?) and I thought to myself: i need to get better at writting essays in english... . So here I am.

MASP and the art of being bold

I went to MASP ( Museum of Art of São Paulo) today and it went great, I absolutely loved the Gran Fury exhibition, I saw an exhibition of Masi Mamani / Bartolina Xixa and I realised that to make ART you have to be bold. By seeing this two films two parts of me entered in conflict: the one that is a pure artist and the one that is afraid of what others will say, think, react and do. How many times I saw a artist performing and being fragile in their own way and saw friends of mine, colleagues or strangers laughing, making fun of or/and mistreating them for being "strange"?

By seing this film I've realised that I have to "put my 'cara-tapa' " or "eat my hat " to make art, to make people feel. It is not because it's "strange" (in many quotes) that it is bad, being strange is the way humans are and that is beautiful and what make us humans.

The art of being bold/2

The museum have a "fix" art gallery that is separated from the exhibits, in this area is located a very large group of artists from around the world and it also the place that contains the famous ones like Van gogh, Anita Malfati, Monet and etc.

My main goal when I got there was see the parts that I haven't saw with time in mid 2021/2022. But what happened is that when I got into the first part my goal had changed, this was now seing all of the arts again with other perspective.

I was sedated with all of that art, it was like a medicine I should had taken it before, but then I got reflective (I always am lmao, don't mind me) I saw majority of people skipping the non-realistic or not half-realistic (i think i can call it that) arts

Note: It is important to highlight that people have different forms of appreciating art and im not criticizing the way people do this or the likings of people before saying what i need to say.

also the quantity of people seeing those types of art were abruptly smaller than the ones seeing paintings that were inspired by realism or were made in that time.

I started to notice that the amount of time I was spending in this types of art were small when you compare with the ones that follows another style.

Maybe I must be getting a little boring, i tought to my self, maybe I am thinking a little retrograde but if you want realism without any type of cientific research: take a picture! or smth idk

Ways of expressing art is different to everybody, it was a little hypocrite to think that way but what my revolt was really trying to say is that the society made us glorify only realistic arts in a way that everything that got out of this little metarphorical box was wrong and ugly. Out of the artist "bubble" the majority of artists that are seen like "the next big artist" or like "the most beautiful art of modern history" are realism artist (for non artists of course, one of the biggest artists in the world is a abstract artist). That is the way we're raised and to desconstruct that concept that we were build in is harsh.

For me as an artist i think it is way more difficult to make a piece that contains the feeling you're trying to pass than to make a realist painting, realism is something the art school teaches you, how to transfer your feelings to whoever you see isn't, it is life that does.

A verdadeira arte é só um reflexo dos sentimentos de quem a contempla. (...) Você sente que você está dentro do vazio, você é vazia, tudo aos seus arredores é vazio. (...) Por um momento é como se você pudesse se banhar na sua própria alma, nos seus próprios sentimentos.

True art is just a reflection of the feelings of those who contemplate it. (...) You feel that you are inside the void, you are empty, everything around you is empty. (...) For a moment it's as if you could bathe in your own soul, in your own feelings.

(i can't believe that i just quoted Cellbit)

Paintings that i liked - a little review with all that said

dora longo bahia campo e contracampo

dora long bahia field and counter field

this one made me shout out loud "ca.ra.lho", okay i didn't shout it... but metarphorically i did. This one is the type of art you have to see in real life to feel it.

Guerilla Grils i already knew it and love it but seeing it again made me think about that the "the advantages of being a woman in art" is about cience too

If you reading this right now don't speak portuguese i strongly recomend you to look up for Guerilla Girls

i got tired of writing so i will just write and SOMETIME i edit this

e.fshcute cachoeira de paulo afonso

natureza morta de nilson baniwa

victor meirelles

paul cézanne

josé pancetti

henri matize

leonilson agora e as oportunidades

the vangogh, monet and cavalcanti for being classics and not boring ( i have to edit this later to say why i think this is a good way of realism for me)

hieronymus bosch as tentaçoes de

and the 1300's and 1200's paintings that i didnt spected to be there

#art #museum #guerilla #blog #blogging #english #brazil

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kakhaev-ivan · 5 months

Text

rehabilitation is inevitable

what you paying attention to that thing will gain power. who would thought that attention is actually power, different from physical power. you can have power in a physical sense: move rocks and another power: select what rocks you want to move.

it feels like magic. imagine that you have magical powers to transform matter into whatever you want, all u need is to apply attention power and physical power to it. now some things are more clear, for example why you can’t sit and do complex things that require a lot of attention, because your attention power is weak. it will be the same as pushing rock that you too weak to move.

now the question is how to train ur attention? continue with the analogy, for muscles you lift weights that you can lift and increase weights when it feels ez. so you will assume that you pick the thing that requires attention and do that as long as you can… to wage, but sounds like meditation.

i think anything that requires active participation from you can be seen as mediation. in a way you concentrating on writing/reading this text is an act of meditation. but why watching youtube doesn’t feel like meditation, it feels more like trance.

what is trance and how it’s different form meditation? you can just observe without any participation because you don’t have any intent, this is the trance. you losing yourself in a thing that you observing, just watching and listening without any inner thoughts or meanings. this is how youtube feels (or now tiktok). you even holding yourself to go in a bathroom till video ends, what a shame.

anything can be a meditation, like you concentrate on one point, you can concentrate on one thing (or thought) and dedicate your whole attention to it. but it should be a active attention not a passive one. again i want to point out differences between meditation and trance, in a first one you actively engaging with world around you(even if it’s just looking at a candle flame). second one it’s just a passive perception without thinking. you can think about it like a watching youtube whole day vs writing long essay in quiet room.(not sure if this analogy works well).

so i fully concentrate on a writing and trying to find this feeling of concentration and emergence into reality. all i feel is that i actually creating smth, feels good man. but writing about writing is not really interesting. it’s different, i can feel that i exist and small rocks of this world can be moved around.

i not saying that long concentration on one thing is good, i just think that you can choose action in a world or media consumption with reaction on the things that happens around you. first decision will help u steer life a little bit, where the second one is just drifting wherever it takes you.

stay alert, stay awake and beware of your surroundings. make a goal and consciously pursue it. you can go slow, but concentrate on your goal and don’t fall into trance. and i’m not saying work all the time, im saying that rest can be more enjoyable then just nut and watch youtube, just don’t run from your feelings and reality.

and i can feel that my attention is gone, i want to switch and do anything else but write. or start to compress this text into more pure and dense sentences. should i keep going? this is the exercise, and i tired. so i will write tomorrow and see how much i can do that without distractions. maybe we will have positive progress over time.

PS. Went all over the place with this one, i hope it will make sense tomorrow.

*** (notes)

you have intent and you acting on your intent to achieve smth

activly searching /persiving vs passivly persiving

like a remote on a desk

unconscious behavior vs trance

nihilism leads to trance.

#blog #text #long reads #philosophy

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panzerkatzee · 6 months

Text

Good day ya'll!

Its 11:30 and I just completed a small research session on fillipino martial arts and taking extensive notes on how my characters might move in the upcoming combat scenes. Funny enough, I always thought my larp experience would help in writing combat realistically… but oh boy… I WAS SO WRONG… its embarassing.

I am still no real expert, but maybe I can find someone to help with those scenes in particular down the line. For now I did watch some videos and read some instructions online and feel confident to get into the fight scene, I've been hyped for yesterday… but first… warm up time!!

by Electrum Photography

Then and again, he would get a flicker of red eyes, burning brightly with flashes of inert blood magic, his friend no doubt struggling to hold it back, hating crowds as it was. Dan… you are getting an ear full, for dragging her out here, he thought ruefully and picked up his pacing again. A few moments later, she stumbled free from the bodies swaying and squirming with the thrumming beats. "going to try smth new, winky face", had been the last text he received from her before getting on the tube and hot damn… she had. Only her hair was reminiscent of the timid mage, kept straight and falling down onto her shoulders, bangs freshly trimmed to end in a straight line above her brows. To cover her chest Lucille wore only a black pleather bra, the burning church tattooed across he abdomen, was on full display, showing its bell-tower ablaze, right between her breasts. She had paired it off with nothing more than a pair of latex gloves and a matching skirt, making Dan sweat just by looking at it. Clashing with the entire get up, the mad woman had forgone the use of shoes completely.

Not my best work… but after spending so much time on researching, I am a bit anxious to get writing. There is still some catching up with the long-term goal to do… soooo snaps fingers LET'S DO IT!

Okaaay… five hours later… didn't hit the word count… yet. But I am due for a food break, having ordered poké bowl from my fav restaurant.

I really underestimated how far fight scenes were out of my comfortzone… usually I am more for the whole emotional stuff… but as I am writing sci-fi about ppl doing sneaky shit and pissing off powerful other ppl, I don't think I will get away without it…

In the end… I went against the plan I had, and reshuffled my entire story a little bit.. soooo.. that just might turn into something interesting… who knows…

As of now I am at ~1400 words, so very close… aaaand the next scene coming up, will be snugly inside my comfort zone again, hence I am no tooo worried, I won't hit my mark for the day.This wraps up Chapter IV nice and neat~

I do a lot better at starting a chapter than ending it sooo...

But.. to learn from this, I will probably alter the daily warm up challenge a bit… by changing it to stuff I am not quite good at yet..

Maybe a paragraph of a battle scene or dialogue each day? Something like this.

As it stands now, I will wait for my food and write a bit more afterwards…

For now, lets continue with the Playlist, shall we?

Today's song: Faunts - M4 Pt.2

youtube

Why is this on my playlist? Those among you with an excellent taste in Video Games, might already know this one. If not by name, then from the Mass Effect I credits, as it is from the Game's OST. To be honest, it doesn't align at all with what I usually listen to, but then that's mostly everything that leads to the release of dopamine in my brain… so I can't claim any consistency there. Being a huuuuge fan of the Mass Effect Trilogy… and my alien waifu Garrus, connecting a very peaceful time in my life with these games… an age of innocence so to speak.. I have feelings about the song as well…

The lyrics just resonate with me… and I kinda always come back to it, when I have a hard time. Its not cheerful or anything.. but it holds this deepfelt wish for someone to heal… and struggling with mental illness, I just need it.

As my novel draws a lot from my personal experiences and how I see the world, this fits the story's playlist quite well… and its Mass Effect related… sooo doubly perfect~

Sooooo I will go wait for food now and play some Mahjong or whatever :D Have a lovely day~

#writing #creative writing #on writing #national novel writing mont #nanowrimo 2023 #nanowrimo #sci fi novel #science fiction #sci fi #writing challenge #writing journal #writing journey #faunts #mass effect #Youtube

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mudskip-muses · 2 years

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"I'm tired of laying here in this stupid bed" with fuyuhiko and gundham. Non-despair au but fuyuhiko is in the hospital because he lost his eye due to an accident or smth? I'm sorry I'm not really good at asks and stuff but I admire your Tumblr and AO3 writing :)))

Gundham simply wrinkled his nose at the complaint, the paper pulled up from the clipboard in his hand being dropped over the one he had been reading with a sigh, one that was equal parts exasperated and fond. "Yes, well if you did not insist on engaging in battle with Nobody, you would have no need for such a thing..." He said without a concern, the clipboard being set to the side as he leaned back in his chair beside Fuyuhiko's bed, the breeder deliberately sat in his line of sight. It took the smaller man a moment to comprehend what the other man had said, head slowly turning to look at him as he tried to fight a smile off his lips. "...Did you just call me a fucking cyclops?"

Gundham, pleased that his reference had been understood, just smiled, his legs coming to cross over one another as he reached for the clipboard again. Fuyuhiko just shook his head, watching the breeder read for a moment before a thought seemed to occur to him. "Hey wait...that's the doctor's clipboard, where the hell did you get that?" Again, Gundham just smiled, though this one was more of a smirk as he flipped through the pages, an action without a goal, idle hands simply looking for something to do. "He shouldn't have left it where it could be reached." Was his only explanation as he skimmed through the pages once again, as if he hadn't read them a dozen times before.

"If you get kicked out, I'm not helping you." Fuyu said with a snort, but that little smile was still there. "I do not expect you to." Was Gundham's answer, not at all fazed by the yakuza's words. "I also do not expect to be caught." This got Fuyuhiko to laugh again, but it was a bitter thing, the action in turn sending a shot of pain through his head, something he only was barely able to cover up. "No one ever does..."

They fell into a silence at that, Gundham only leaving for a moment to sneak the clipboard back where it belonged once he had flipped through it a few more times, wishing to commit the information to memory for future reference. Sitting back down, he threw a cookie of all things at the yakuza, something he had purchased from the vending machine down the hall, as well as a bag of sunflower seeds for himself and his Devas.

Fuyuhiko didn't say anything, just shot the breeder a sideways look as he fed seeds to his Devas, that sweet little smile of the other man's stopping him from any sort of complaint. He was halfway through the cookie before he spoke again, the wrapping crinkling in his grip. "...You don't have to stay, you know." Gundham didn't say anything for a moment, just sat there and watched Fuyuhiko fiddle with the wrapper, squishing the last few bites of the cookie within with his tight grip.

"I am aware, but what if someone wishes to kill you?" It was a rather valid concern with the yakuza's status and all, but what was a very real worry was quickly covered up with a sly smile. "You do have the eye of a vulture after all..." Fuyu just laughed, a real one this time, the rest of the crumbled cookie being shoved in his mouth before handing the breeder the wrapper. "Are you just gonna sit here and quote literature at me all night? Or do you actually have that shit memorized?" It's said around a mouthful of cookie, a bit of hope at the edge of the words.

Gundham just smiled, the wrapper being crumbled up and tossed as he began to speak; "True!—nervous—very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but why will you say that I am mad? The disease had sharpened my senses—not destroyed—not dulled them. Above all was the sense of hearing acute. I heard all things in the heaven and in the earth. I heard many things in hell. How, then, am I mad? Hearken! and observe how healthily—how calmly I can tell you the whole story..."

#hfhjsakfh thank you so much!!#im assuming you dont have an rp blog and want this to be like a drabble uwu #i hope you like it!!!!#muse: gundham tanaka #muse: fuyuhiko kuzuryu #drabbles

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kyovtani · 3 years

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𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓 | 𝒌𝒖𝒓𝒐𝒐 𝒕𝒆𝒕𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒐𝒖

✗ pairing: kuroo tetsurou x female reader

✗ genre: smut, like just smut, lit nothing but smut; absolute filth but still classy so it's fílth anyway; established relationship!AU

✗ word count: 4.1k+

✗ warnings: swearing, heavy dumbification and degradation, mean/hard (to soft) dom!kuroo, DD/LG (d*ddy dom / little girl), mentions of jealousy and slight possessive behavior, orgasm denial, p*ssy slapping, some spanking, praising, ch*king, impregnation, some c*m play, car s*x, (a little bit of) cute aftercare

– A/N: Happiest Birthday to my fave scorpio boy in HQ!! This is an old fic of mine which I wrote about a year ago and as I thought about it, Kuroo does fit the concept really well and since I’m a little busy writing smth new, I thought why not reuse this big boy! I hope you guys enjoy this one and please feel free to leave feedback of any kind if you did!!

x all the love, zade.

✗ summary: your boyfriend is sweet, caring and oh so soft, so you decide it’s time to make him lose his composure...

It takes a lot to make Kuroo switch from his soft, caring demeanor to his hard dom persona because after everything, he remains a patient man.

He puts your pleasure above anything else; your body a temple for him to worship and take care of with every part of his being.

However, sometimes, no matter how much you love your sweet, loving boyfriend, you find yourself growing a little bored of his constant softness; your desires going further than just being choked and called kitten.

You want Kuroo to absolutely destroy you, to put it as simple as possible. The guttural desire to have him use you for his own pleasure, claim you in the most intimate ways possible and every now and then your body craves this certain type of pleasure; the one which lays pretty close to pure pain.

Led by your body’s deep desire, you find yourself seeking methods which might not be the morally right ones but at this point you struggle to care the slightest bit about morality.

You set Kuroo losing his composure as your goal, trying your very best without even overthinking the possible consequences and if that means that you have to let a random man flirt the living hell out of you right in front of your boyfriend (who happens to have slight possessive tendencies) during your weekly grocery shopping, then so be it.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

Kuroo watches the blood boiling scene in front of him with his brows furrowed in pure anger; annoyance flooding his usually so soft and calm features and the more time passes, the angrier he gets.

However, Kuroo’s not a dom for nothing.

He keeps his cool, even lets you take the guy's number as he causally ignores the way that stupid fucker lookes at your ass like a fucking pervert, before the two of you eventually finish the shopping without Kuroo commenting on any of it.

At this point you’re just frustrated. Anger and irritation rush through your body at such a fast pace, you feel your head spinning the closer you get to the car and if it wasn’t for the fact that you’re currently in a public parking lot, you would have thrown a fit already.

Tired of Kuroo’s oblivion, you finally get yourself to gather every bit of composure you have left and turn around to just tell him about what the fuck you want when he suddenly pushes you against the car door, pressing his strong body into your back.

"What the fuck was that little scene supposed to be, hm, doll?", he hisses into your ear, his hot breath fanning your neck and just as usual you love the way his deep and almost unrecognizably raspy voice sends jolts of arousal through your whole body right into your core.

In an instant, you feel your cunt clenching in despair, drenching the fabric of your panties just like that and even though you’re very much aware of your surroundings, you can’t bring yourself to actually give a fuck.

"Good fuck dolls answer when they are being talked to", Kuroo grunts and pulls the lobe of your ear between his teeth, easily eliciting a sweet moan from you before he suddenly wraps his strong fingers around your throat. The cold metal of his rings builds the perfect contrast to the hotness of your skin and with another soft whine, you press your thighs together.

And then, as you gently throw your head back against his shoulder, Kuroo’s hand finds its way around your breast, quickly and incredibly harshly pinching your sensitive nipple between his fingertips to remind you of his – still unanswered – question.

"T-Tetsu, I just-", he doesn’t give you the opportunity to finish your sentence, casually tightening his grip around your throat and cutting off your air supply in one go.

"How the fuck dare you call me by my name right fucking now, you cockhrungy little slut?”, Kuroo’s voice is cold and distant; the anger and disappointment evident in every single one of his words and you can’t believe just how much your pussy starts spasming in response.

“You better address me correctly or last night was the last time you got to cum, did you fucking hear me?", he’s quick to add, the lack of oxygen in your body sending you even deeper into the beautiful haze of pleasure. You barely notice the way you start gasping gasping for air, your lids fluttering shut as you press your thighs even tighter together to get some kind of relief from the heavy pressure on your throbbing cunt.

"Y-Yes, Daddy", you whimper and push your forehead against the cold surface of the door, your body slowly but surely growing overwhelmed by the arousal heating you up.

And in the middle of it all, you’re still incredibly grateful for the lack of company due to the late time of the day because even though you enjoy this with every single pore in your body, you don’t want anyone else to see you like this.

Kuroo lets go of your throat, his hand wandering in between your legs and underneath the waistband of your shorts, just to suddenly cup your cunt. The feeling of his fingers pressing against the drenched fabric of your panties, his rough digits rubbing your needy clit makes you let out a loud, throaty moan.

"Fucking whore", Kuroo curses, his lips so close to your ear, you feel yourself literally melting into a puddle of despair underneath his tall figure, "I can't believe you let that bastard flirt with you right in front of my eyes", he continues and sucks the skin of your neck into his mouth, sucking harshly before he harshly pulls it in between his teeth.

You whine again, constant mewls of frustration leaving your lips as you try your best to move your hips against his big hand, yet fail miserably.

"I should have fucked you right then and there just to show him who this slutty cunt belongs to", Tetsu groans, rubbing his hard erection against your ass but refusing to to move his fingers on your clit. His words and the pressure on your sensitive bundle of nerves has you moaning and without even trying to calm yourself down, you reach back to take a hold of Kuroo’s thick hair.

"You would have liked that, am I right, kitty cat? No, wait – you would have loved it. You're literally getting wetter and wetter just at the thought being fucked like a stupid whore", Kuroo scoffs, a hint of disbelief wavering in his voice and without missing a beat, you let out a sound of approval in response.

"I'm not even surprised", he hisses and suddenly, pulling his hand out of your shorts, "at the end of the day, you're nothing but a pathetic whore who thinks with her stupid cunt and nothing but her stupid cunt", and then he lets go of you.

His sudden absence leaves you tumbling against the door with a soft whimper and it's then that you notice the way your whole body is shivering from the overwhelming amount of arousal rushing through your system.

"D-Daddy, please", you whisper helplessly, using every single bit of your energy left to turn around and face him, "I need you", you add and can’t help the soft sob falling past your lips; two tears finding their way down your cheeks as you look into the beautiful face of your lover.

The strictness and distance in his features makes you gulp harshly, his usually so soft and calming eyes filled with nothing but hunger and anger and you let yourself devour this rare sight.

"Oh, look at that", Kuroo pushes his bottom lip into a fake pout with amusement sparkling in the pretty brown around his iris, "my little, cockcrazy whore thinks she has the right to even think about my cock after pulling a show like that”, he lets out a loud, empty chuckle, “how cute and oh, so pathetic, kitty.”

Kuroo takes your chin in between his fingers before he straightens his face and pushes his tongue against the inside of his cheek.

"Backseat", is all he grunts, "I guess I’ve been a bit too good to you. I haven't fucked some manners into you in some time, have I, pretty kitty?”, you look at him with big, teary eyes and your lips parted before you bring yourself to nod in response to his question.

“Is that why you keep acting up like some needy, filthy little whore? Do you want Daddy to treat you like this, hm? Because you know how much I hate disobedient kittens who flirt with other men, yet choose to do it anyway. Right in front of me, too."

His words stir something deep inside of you, your pussy clenching even harder around nothing as a strong jolt of arousal finds its way right into the pit of your stomach.

You have never been more turned on by anyone or anything and at this point you’ve completely forgotten your surroundings; Kuroo and his huge cock the only thing on your mind as you pull open the door to the backseat of his car.

Kuroo watches you carefully, his eyes roaming the sight of your shaky thighs and the damp spot on the grey material of your shorts before he gets himself to tear his gaze away from you, lifting his head and checking the mostly empty parking lot to make sure nobody is watching the two of you.

He doesn’t like doing it in public; the thought of being caught or watched is definitely alluring and tempting but usually followed by the image of it actually happening and a jolt of slight disgust washing over him.

However this time Kuroo is absolutely ready to make an exception because after remaining patient with you for so long, he knows he won’t be able to keep it up for the entire drive back home.

After making sure nobody is around – his habit of parking all the way at the very end of the parking lot no matter what coming as an advantage – Kuroo also makes his way into the backseat, his gaze instantly finding your glossy eyes before he takes in the oddly satisfying sight of your tear stained cheeks and pouty lips.

You look so vulnerable, so helpless, so pathetic – the thought of completely destroying you in every way possible quickly clouding his mind and the longer he looks at you, the more he just wants to fuck you into oblivion.

But again, Kuroo isn’t a dom for nothing.

With hooded eyes, he silently motions you to turn around, the urge to press your face into the seat taking over every bit of his brain.

You don’t hesitate and obediently move onto your stomach, pulling yourself up onto your knees as your eyes nervously roam the inside of his car.

Your heart is hammering against your rib cage at an unhealthy pace, adrenaline and arousal thrumming inside your ears and clouding your mind in the best way possible.

Oh how you love the effect he has on you.

"Take off your shorts and then finger yourself", Kuroo hisses, casually pushing his sweats as well as boxers briefs down his muscular thigh, exposing his thick, rockhard cock to the cold yet tensed air in the car and letting out a soft hiss, "I want you to stretch that little cunt of yours", he adds and without even trying to hide it, you turn your head to watch the way Kuroo spits into his palm and then wraps his fingers around his cock.

You let out a loud, desperate moan at the sight of his huge length; the tip red and angry, already leaking so much precum, you feel your mouth watering at the memory of his taste coating your tongue. You gulp harshly the longer you watch him stroke his length like that, your pussy clenching in despair at the mere thought of how good he fills you up.

You hear the loud sound of skin meating skin before a harsh pain starting from your inner thigh rushes through you; a choked out whimper leaving your lips before you can literally feel your ears perking up at the sound of Kuroo’s voice.

"If I have to repeat myself one more fucking time, I swear to God, I won't let you cum for a whole month, kitty", Tetsurou growls, an almost inaudbile moan following his threat and after mumbling a soft apology, you're quick to get rid of your shorts and underwear just as you were told.

You bend your body down and spread your legs, only to feel waves of embarrassment and shame in combination with heavy, hot arousal overwhelming you.

Kuroo has the perfect view on your spasming cunt and you know he is basically devouring you with his eyes, your head spinning at the thought.

"Oh, kitty", he sighs and picks up the pace of his hand, focusing on his tip every now and then to slightly edge himself because even though he usually manages to hide it really well, this whole situation has him a lot more worked up than he had expected.

And now that he actually got to see how much his change in demeanor and choice of words have gotten to you, he is more than just struggling to keep his cool composure.

Kuroo can’t help but think of the way your slick arousal tastes and feels on his tongue, your sweet moans filling his ears as you part those pretty lips of yours in pleasure.

Kuroo watches the way you slide two of your fingers through your glistening folds, collecting your own juice before aiming for your sensitive, hardened little clit and as soon as you press the tips of your digits against the bundle of nerves, both of you let out a loud moan.

"Don't forget about that tight hole of yours, baby", Tetsurou grunts, throwing his head back as he curses himself for slipping out of his persona even if it wasn't for longer than a second.

You whimper at the sound of your favorite pet name falling past those pretty, swollen lips and choke on that exact whimper when you insert both of your fingers into the warm walls of your cunt.

"That's right, just like that, you little slut", Kuroo’s quick to comment, his other hand pushing the material of your (his) oversized shirt up to reveal the soft flesh of your ass before spanking you softly and then digging his fingers into your skin, "even though your fingers are nothing compared to my cock, we don't want you to to get hurt, right?", and again, he finds himself quickly regretting his choice of words and lack of authority.

But he can't help it. You’re his perfect, sweet faced little angel girl after all; there’s no way he can completely abandon his soft, caring side no matter how bratty you become. Not even thinking about giving you a chance to respond, he reaches out and plants another harsh spank on your slightly sore ass.

You muffle a loud whimper, burying your face in your arm as you try to keep your noises down in hopes of getting to hear the sinful moans of your Daddy; however, Kuroo is quick to notice your little plan.

"You're really trying it tonight, huh, you fucking cumslut? You better start moaning or I'm about to get really, really mad and believe me, you do not want that", Kuroo scolds you, his hand leaving your ass and wrapping around the one buried between your legs before he starts helping you thrust your fingers into your wet pussy.

Kuroo watches the way you clench around your digits with his lips parted in pleasure and arousal tingling at the bottom of his spine and if it wasn't for the punishment he has in mind, he would have fucked your pretty pussy.

Your loud moans, high pitched whimpers and desperate whines start filling the small space of his expensive car, making it even harder for him to stay collected and as he slowly observes the way your thighs slowly start shaking, he pulls your hand away from your drenched cunt with a deep grunt.

"Let's go over the rules really quick, kitty", Kuroo sighs and pulls you to stand on your knees, making sure you don't hit your head before he pushes you against the back of the passenger seat.

Your head is spinning at an inhumane space and you don’t even know if you can form proper sentences especially at the feeling of Kuroo’'s hot tip prodging at your entrance. However the slap against your sensitive pussy manages to pull you back to reality rather in an instant.

"Green means good, o-orange stands for okay, slightly uncomfortable and r-red is the signal for you to stop, Daddy", you whisper, burying your face in back of the passenger seat’s head part as Kuroo slowly starts pulling you down onto his lap, making you sick onto his big cock painfully slowly.

"Keep it going, you're not done yet, kitty. Come the fuck on, stop disappointing me like this", he groans and throws his head back, the sudden urge to feel your lips on his and your tongue in his mouth making his mind go absolutely empty.

His words ring in your head, your mind foggy and sight slightly blurry as he finally bottoms out and knocks the breath out of your lungs just like that.

You try to stay focused, knowing and very well aware of his order but the feeling of his pulsing cock inside of your tight pussy, tip right against the entrance of your womb has you going mad crazy.

"One tap, if I can't breathe, a pinch if it hurts and two if I want you to stop", you finally manage to mumble and the moan that leaves your lips when Kuroo slowly starts pulling out of you at those words – is almost animalistic.

"I'd love to praise you but you did make me wait and you actually have the pleasure to feel my cock even after all that shit, so", Kuroo’s voice is slightly strained, your tight walls gripping his huge cock like a vice and no matter how many times he got to experience this feeling, he knows he’s never going to get used to it.

You start moaning shamelessly, not even able to close your mouth as Kuroo rams himself back into you and then finally picks up a steady rhythm. Your fingers dig into the fabric of the seat, face buried in the headrest as you let him use you like a doll.

You love the way Kuroo’s grunts grow louder, his thrusts more impatient and the grip in your hips painfully tight; you love the fact that he is enjoying this as much as you were.

But then, out of nowhere, you realize how quiet he has been ever since he has started fucking you.

Dirty talk is something Kuroo has alway been really into, the lewd words falling past his lips so easily and managing to rile you up every time, that you haven’t even noticed how much you miss it.

"D-Daddy", you moan and gulp harshly, your hand reaching behind you to wrap your fingers around his, "t-talk to me, please", you ask softly and spare a quick glance at your lover; his astonishing beauty sending jolts of warmth through your chest.

Kuroo tsks, a loud scoff leaving his lips before he rolls his eyes and keeps thrusting into you. He is absolutely obsessed with the way your cunt spasmed around his cock, the sight of his huge length disappearing inside of your tight hole edging him more and more.

"P-Please, Daddy", tears flood your eyes rather quickly, the pleasure making you incredibly emotional and the tight feeling in your chest looking for relief as you softly sob into your arm, "I need you to talk to me, please; I'm sorry for acting like a whore", you cry and throw your head back, a choked out sob-moan leaving your throat and even though Kuroo does enjoy the way you are literally falling apart on his cock, he hates seeing you cry like that.

"P-Please call me your pretty girl and t-tell me how much you – fuck – love my cunt, please", you beg shameslessly, the tears streaming down your cheeks and leaving hot trails behind and despite the guilt inside your chest, you slowly start coming closer to your relief; the taste of your upcoming high coating your tongue in the sweetest way possible.

"Ssh, baby", Kuroo finally lets go of his hard mask, his chest tightening with every one of your soft cries and even though he knew he'd break at some point, he still had hoped to keep it up a little longer than usual, "it's okay pretty girl, I got you. I'm here, kitten", he whispers and as his soft voice fills your ears, a loud sob leaves you, followed by a tiny moan when his fingers start drawing circles into your neglected clit.

"Come on, angel, I want you to cum", he places a soft kiss on the back of your hand before he starts thrusting into you even harder, "show me who this sweet cunt belongs to", your lover's oddly assuring words are the last straw and without another second passing by, you let go and feel the coil in your core snap; shoving you head first into your high.

Several waves of pleasure hit you, your orgasm literally ruining you to a point where you struggle to take proper breaths.

Kuroo helps you ride out your high by slowing down the movements of his hands and hips, his breath getting stuck in his throat as he tries to handle your constant clenching.

"Cum inside of me, Daddy", you whisper, exhaustion dripping from every single one of your words yet you still let out soft little whimpers to encourage your pretty faced boyfriend, "want you to fuck your baby into my belly", you add quickly and the way literal innocence is coating your voice is what throws Kuroo over the edge.

Your cunt continues to spasm around him, making sure he cums as hard as you did and then, after his whole body halts its movements, he cums inside of you; painting your warm walls in several shades of white.

Kuroo quickly pulls out of you, the loss of contact and sudden feeling of emptiness has you whimpering slowly but you instantly go silent when he pulls you into his arms, pushing your face into the sweaty crook of his neck before he slowly starts caressing your naked thighs and massages your scalp.

A couple of minutes pass by, the exhaustion overcoming the two of you and when Kuroo notices the way your lips grow heavier by the minute, he presses his lips against yours and pulls you into a passionate kiss. A lazy clash of teeth, your tongue slowly entering his mouth and of course he is quick to swallow your spit, making you whimper into his mouth.

"Please don't ever do that again, my love", he whispers against your parted lips, his thumb grazing your cheeks and then your neck, "if you want me to be hard on you, there's no need to flirt with other guys, you just have to tell me, okay? You know I will do anything to make you happy", he mumbles and you quickly reply with a soft hum of approval.

"I love you, Daddy", you sigh, burying your face in his chest as your lips stretch into a big smile when you hear him mumble, "I love you, too, pretty girl."

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu smut #hq!! smut #haikyuu!! smut #haikyuu x female reader #haikyuu x reader #kuroo smut #kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsurou smut #haikyuu scenarios #kyovtani

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