#like it scratches an itch in my brain and makes me feel at peace :'))))
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i dream, now, of a normal life with you ; suguru geto
synopsis; suguru isn’t a lightweight. this is your first time actually seeing him drunk — though maybe it shouldn’t come as a surprise that he’d be the sappy kind.
word count; 9.4k (..... i got carried away ok)
contents; suguru geto/reader, gn!reader (shoko calls u "girl" but in a "girl help" way not a gendered way), written w a no curses au in mind, sugu is a sappy emotional drunk i said what i said, sickening amounts of fluff, depictions of intoxication, reader is averse to alcohol, sugu wants to marry u so bad it makes him look silly, lots of emotions & lots of love <33
a/n; this fic has been ROTTING in my drafts for the longest time but its super precious to me and now i finally get to post it!! @softgirlgonehaywire & @hayakawalove ily ty for being interested in sappy!sugu this is a treat for u <33
the bar isn’t all that far off from your apartment.
it’s a short distance, really. walk straight ahead, until you reach the record store that suguru likes to frequent, and then take a right; a minute or two uphill, and then you’ll be able to see the blue of the sea. once you’re there, all that’s left is to look for mellow golden lighting and descend a set of stairs.
which is what you’re currently doing, popsicle in hand, loose clothes and comfortable shoes on as you wallow in the mellow summer evening. everything is blue — the dark shade of the sky, and your ice pop, pastel and sweet, tasting of pure youth. the hoodie you threw on is a rich cobalt, suguru’s in name but yours in spirit. he only wears it when you complain that it doesn’t smell like him anymore.
humming a jolly tune, you take a sharp turn, allowing the summer sensations to curl around your subconscious. blissed out and content.
you were so, so bored — stuck at home with no one to keep you company, no one to mumble snarky commentary about the show playing on tv, no one to run their fingers through your hair while your head rests in their lap. pure torture, really, being faced with the consequences of your own actions. after you stupidly told suguru you’d be okay on your own.
he even asked you twice, just to be sure, even told you that he’d prefer you to join him on his night out. and again, you declined; because it’s been so long since he had some time alone with shoko and satoru, and you were feeling a little tired anyways.
so he gave in. heading out, with a promise to bring back a tub of your favorite ice cream, leaving you with the apartment to yourself. did you come to regret your little white lie? maybe. possibly.
but everything worked out in the end.
a pleasant breeze caresses your skin, brushing against the apple of your cheek, and you watch as peach blossoms dance in a faraway park. cicadas cling to every tree in sight, buzzing a pleasant tune, mingling with the giddy giggles of high school students enjoying their summer vacation. it’s been raining for a couple of days; you can still smell it in the air, feel it in the low tinge of humidity clinging to your skin, still hear suguru’s insistence that you bring an umbrella with you to work — just in case.
but today, the skies were clear, and it’s late, not too humid but not too chilly. and the stars are out, glimmering in that fuzzy sea of mellow cerulean, leaking out like little marbles cast into space. falling down, down, down, close enough for you to see. from here, it looks as if they’re waving. you resist the urge to wave back.
peace. bliss. a nostalgia so vibrant you could drown in it, feel it lick at your ankles like soft sea foam.
eager to scratch a certain itch in your brain, attention span zipping from one street vendor to the pop music blasting from a couple streets away, you take your phone out from your pocket. absently scrolling through your messages, until you get to the ones shoko sent you just ten minutes ago. the ones that brought you out here, into a summer evening soon to slip into nightfall, ones that have you walking to the bar you chose not to join them at.
messages that still have you pushing back a bout of giggles, chewing lazily on your ramune ice pop with a giddy smile.
sho 🚬: come get ur man
sho 🚬: he’s drunk.
sho 🚬: like DRUNK drunk
you: …… um.
you: what happened to hi? hello?? good evening???
sho 🚬: no time for that. look
sho 🚬: [ image ]
sho 🚬: he looks so goofy lol
unable to resist the temptation, you press the pad of your finger against the screen — opening the image attachment, just to drink in the sight once again. what you see is a certain man, slumped over in his seat, cheek smooshed against the wooden table in front of him. messy hair, no longer tied into a bun, cascading down his shoulders and back. from the little you can see of his face, his skin is flushed a light pink, and his eyes are closed, fingers still curled around an empty beer jug.
like a sleepy puppy.
a coo tiptoes on your tongue, but you bite down on your lip in an effort to stop it, just grinning at your screen with pure adoration in your lovesick eyes.
he’s drunk, alright. an unfamiliar sight, but not at all unwelcome. because he’s cute, terribly so, so cute that it hurts, even when he’s obviously wasted. it’s almost funny — you know their drinking habits. shoko holds her liquor so well that it’s a little horrifying, and satoru can get wasted if he has more than a sip of it. and suguru?
suguru never gets drunk. he barely even drinks. out of consideration for satoru, maybe, or you. probably both. that’s just how he is; you thought he hated fish for years, because he was always so eager to give you the best bites of the sushi rolls you ordered. turns out he was just indulging you.
so, to be frank — the idea of him suddenly being drunk is a little bit of a shocker. but it’s also kind of exciting, in a ridiculous way. new, fun, just what you need when you’re bored out of your mind.
(or maybe you’re just happy to have an excuse to go see him.)
you: NOOOO
you: MY BABY 😭😭😭
you: what did u guys DO to him???
sho 🚬: satoru and him made a bet 😐 you know how they are
sho 🚬: he drank like a divorced mother of four ive never seen something so beautiful
you: ….
you: have i told you that you’re both terrible
sho 🚬: u love us <33
sho 🚬: anyway he’s been asking me where u are for the past ten minutes pls come i can’t stand him
sho 🚬: he��s crying.
you: HUH????????
you: WHY????????????????
sho 🚬: dude i dont know
sho 🚬: please come get him he’s being so sappy that satoru’s abt to throw up
you: ???? okok 😭
you: im omw ig??
sho 🚬: girl hurry he just told me he genuinely appreciates my presence in his life 😐
an exhale — laced with deep amusement — drops from your lips and spills into the summer air. it tastes like a memory from long ago.
slipping your phone back into your pocket, you raise your gaze, searching for a glimmer of goldish light. soaking up the scent of the ocean, sparkling on the border of your peripheral. salty and sweet.
no matter how hard you try, all you can think of is that certain someone, waiting for you to pick him up. your mind keeps drifting back to the way his eyes crinkle when he laughs, the way his hair falls over his face when he leans down, the sound he makes when he stretches in the morning.
you want to see him. badly. you want him near, want to feel the familiar warmth of his presence, want to see him smile and laugh and sigh and raise his eyebrow at your antics.
so there isn’t any time to waste. you’re walking towards that familiar set of stairs before you know it, shoes hitting the asphalt with a mantra of satisfying thuds.
and when you step in through the opened door, you’re immediately engulfed by a sense of overflowing comfort. mellow, warm lights, the soft buzzing of static from an old radio, low citypop beats trailing through the air. the bartender by the counter gives you a curt nod in greeting, before motioning towards a certain table. it’s over in the corner, covered in beer jugs and fancy glasses, with three beauties seated around it.
satoru notices you first.
a bright grin finds its way onto his face, and he waves you over giddily, happily. barely contained excitement in the motion. shoko’s gaze follows his, flitting over to meet yours — and you think she mouths an oh, thank god, before taking another sip from her glass. she brings a hand up in greeting when you come closer, and you can’t see her smile, but there’s a crinkle to her eyes; a warmth in them that you’d never miss.
”hey, guys.”
”yo!” satoru chirps, beaming in a way that’s so distinctly him it makes you soften. he looks so comfortable in his seat, with a cocktail you know is non-alcoholic and probably too sweet for anyone but him to stomach. giggling to himself, leaning over to poke suguru’s cheek, with a teasing declaration of your chaperone is here!
and there he is.
the man you came here for, still slumped over in his seat, unresponsive. not for long. as the lilt of your voice reaches his ears, his eyes flutter open, in a bout of recognition — even in the drunken state he’s in. an immediate sensation of familiarity creeps into his veins, rousing him from his cozy, half-asleep stupor.
he doesn’t even grumble over the way satoru keeps poking at his cheek, interest and attention focused solely on a certain someone. you, your presence.
and when your eyes meet his, he lights up.
it’s precious, you think, how his eyes widen, blooming with genuine affection, so endearing you could kiss him right then and there. his face is flushed, and his hair is tousled, and the warm lighting of the bar paints him in a golden hue. so perfect for him, your star in the sky.
a smile spreads across his lips, big and happy and warm, and you can’t help but mirror it.
(gosh, he’s cute.)
with a dizzy kind of eagerness, suguru sits up, palms flush against the table to support his weight. he stumbles out of his seat, paying no heed to satoru’s amused huff of careful! or the rattling of fragile glass.
it only takes a few uncoordinated steps for him to reach you, where you haphazardly lean against the wall, watching him amusedly. that delighted smile never leaves his lips, as his arms go to curl around your waist, big and heavy, his jaw finding its rightful place on the curve of your shoulder.
”baby,” he drawls, fond and affectionate. breathing you in. ”sweetheart. my angel.”
a flustered puff of laughter slips from your lips, stumbling a little under his weight. his voice is syrupy sweet, overflowing with love and adoration, soft in a way that has your knees buckling. a little raspy. murmured right into your ear, sending pleasant shivers down your spine.
he’s too sweet for you to handle, really, even sweeter than satoru’s overpriced cocktail. and he smells the same as always; a blend between coffee grounds, cigarette smoke and rain, one that never fails to soothe you. even when it’s tangled up with a vague but vivid stench of alcohol, courtesy of the drinking he’s been doing until now.
you crinkle your nose, but don’t let go of him, nuzzling your cheek against the side of his head. words buzzing with warmth. ”hey, sugu.”
suguru only squeezes you tighter, content to have you in his arms. finally, his world makes sense again. all he can do is bask in your voice, warmth, scent — he’s just so enamored by it all. almost in a trance, heartstrings dancing along to the beat of your presence, your very existence, that appears to him as something almost angelic. soft and familiar, something that feels right at home when it’s tucked into his embrace. where he can keep it safe.
”missed you…” he murmurs, sleepy, smearing an open mouthed kiss against the crook of your neck. ”i love you s’much…”
a chuckle. ”i love you too,” you echo, running a steady hand over his back. your voice is laced with something teasing, but awfully fond. ”you really are drunk, aren’t you?”
”mm…” he only hums, cheek pressed flush against your soft skin. ”’m sorry…” he mumbles, stifling a yawn. he sounds a little guilty, and it makes you want to coo. pull his cheek a little.
instead, you laugh. amusement vowen into the bubbly noise. ”it’s fine, sugu. c’mon — let’s go home, alright?”
at that, satoru visibly reacts, placing his glass on the table with a soft clink before getting up to stretch. he grabs suguru’s discarded jacket, letting it hang off his arm as he walks over to the two of you.
”i’ll help you carry him,” he smiles, always so dependable. so ready to be of service. maybe a little too eager to carry suguru around like a sack of potatoes.
a smile blooms on your face, and satoru gives you a playful wink. shoko just leans back in her seat, stretching idly. it feels like home with them there.
”i’ll stay here,” she hums, a faint grin tugging at her lips. ”he’s your problem now.”
”got it.” you meet her lidded eyes, sharing an amused look as satoru tries to coax suguru away from you, pulling at his cheek while he whines and clings to the fabric of your clothing.
finally, he relents, and you look back at the table with a grin. ”see you later, sho’.”
a smile is the only response you get, but it’s enough. it’s her, the same as always, still sipping from a glass of expensive whiskey and raising her hand in a silent see you. relaxed and cool, and so very lovely.
with one arm over satoru’s shoulder and the other clinging to your hoodie, suguru stirs.
”shoko…” he groans, craning his head to look back at her, even as satoru makes a move to leave. ”don’t drink too much. and watch out for strangers…”
he trails off, blinking drowsily, a protective tone to his voice. worried. awfully like him. neither you nor satoru can resist the chuckle you indulge in, but shoko just rolls her hazel eyes.
”i don’t need to hear that from you,” she scoffs, tinged with amusement and what you’re almost certain is embarrassment. there’s a fondness to her snark, one you’d never miss.
(shoko will always be shoko. you know that she appreciates suguru’s concern, even if she doesn’t want to show it.)
”alright, c’mon,” satoru quips, slapping suguru’s back with a grin. ”there, there, big guy. let’s get you home, hm?”
just as you suspected, he doesn’t let you help, doing all the heavy lifting on his own. not breaking a single sweat, flaunting his strength as he hoists suguru up the steps — while you do nothing but follow, a light jacket hanging off your arm.
cold midnight air embraces you, slathering your cheeks with the essence of summer as your shoes meet the asphalt. satoru smiles, a low exhale escaping him, dusting off his hands. ”there we go.”
suguru stumbles towards you, no longer caged in, slumping against your shoulder with a satisfied sigh. blinking slowly, as you link arms, his muddled senses adjusting to the outside world. a pleasantly blue sky, a sun long set, and a string of lamp posts to light up the street ahead of you. artificial fireflies, watching over the town you love so dearly.
you part your lips, and a soft exhale slips out, dripping with fondness. ”thanks, satoru,” you smile, meeting his gaze.
”don’t mention it,” he waves you off, but you know he appreciates it; always eager to be praised. ”can you bring him back by yourself?”
”yeah, we’ll be fine. it’s close, anyway. don’t worry.”
a hum buzzes in his throat, and his cobalt gaze drifts upwards, to bask in the starry sky. a moment passes, and then he’s looking back at you and suguru; a soft and earnest smile playing at his lips. so sincere you want to reach out, cup his cheek, make sure he knows how loved he is.
”i’ll go back to shoko, then,” he chirps. bubbly and graceful, giddy and playful. always so lovely. ”gotta make sure she stays out of trouble.”
a chuckle. you mirror his smile. ”of course.”
and with that, your precious best friend makes a move to return to the bar, taking a decisive step away from you. before he can get too far, though, a certain hand reaches out to hold onto his sleeve — keeping him still.
satoru turns around. blinking once, then twice, in confusion; faced with none other than suguru, still slumped against you. a little out of it, sleepy and disoriented, yawning quietly, but his eyes are as clear as ever. caring and sentimental.
his gaze cuts to the bone of things. it’s something you’ve grown used to.
”thanks, satoru,” he murmurs, letting go of said man’s shirt. the words that spill from his lips are straightforward, a little tactless, but overflowing with earnest appreciation. ”you’re my best friend.”
a moment passes. the stars burn in silence.
satoru blinks.
then he sighs, with what you know is nothing more than feigned annoyance. masking his embarrassment, the same way shoko did, the same way suguru always does. your repressed, beloved little losers.
”yeah, yeah. i got it,” he pats suguru’s shoulder, once, twice. not looking at him. ”you’re such a sap, you know that? geez.”
a grin crawls up to rest on your lips, fresh mischief blooming in your eyes. ”not gonna call him your best friend back?” you tease, a soft tilt of your head.
satoru gives you a glare, playful, one you can’t physically see from behind his shades but still somehow sense. ”don’t add fuel to the fire,” he grins, with a halfhearted flick to your forehead.
before you can bicker further, suguru yawns, loudly, closing his eyes and nuzzling into you. you share an amused look with satoru, until he shakes his head fondly.
”take care of him, alright?”
”i will. you guys have fun!”
and at last, satoru turns on his heel, coupled with a smile and a lazy wave. but suguru calls out to him once more, unwilling to part ways without saying his piece. so sentimental, so loving it comes to him like breathing.
”bye-bye, satoru,” he slurs, voice loud enough for the entire street to hear, tired and honest. raising his arm in a lazy wave. ”i love you!”
”go home already!” satoru shouts, descending down the steps with a flush to his cheeks that you’ll tease him for later. his soft laughter is carried away by the breeze, sweet and saccharine.
(satoru will always be satoru. you know that he loves suguru back, even if he doesn’t want to say it out loud.)
with a faint chuckle, melting into the summer air, you tug on suguru’s arm. ”alright,” you chirp, looking up at him. ”let’s go!”
he seems a little more awake now, at least, trying to match your steps. meanwhile, you do what you can to support his weight; he’s stumbling a bit, but you don’t mind. if anything, his weight is a comfort, your arms linked together like a lucky charm. a safe harbour.
suguru is acting kind of like a big puppy, gazing at you with hearts in his eyes. a little meek, clinging to you, trailing after you pliantly. he’s a little dizzy, still, and he needs you to get back home in one piece. it makes you puff out your chest, stand up straighter. makes you feel protective of your 6’2 boyfriend, all toned muscle and broad shoulders, the personification of scary dog privilege. but he needs you right now.
a soft bout of laughter spills into the air, as you try to ignore his heavy stare. it’s impossible, though — so you turn your gaze to meet his own, and he practically glows under the sound of your giggles, that cheeky smile you’re wearing. ”you okay, suguru?”
his eyes soften. silently, he runs a thumb over the knots of your knuckle, smoothing down your skin, thick fingers intertwined with yours.
he looks deep into your eyes, and a soft hum of affirmation buzzes in his throat.
”i’m just so happy,” he grins, with a sincerity that has your heart doing flips inside your ribcage. it flutters, flutters, flutters, in the wake of his unbridled joy. it buzzes like it wants to break out.
suguru has this dreamy look on his face, one you can do nothing but admire, painted over with fluorescent moonlight and pure summer bliss. one that reminds you a little of high school rooftops, midnight road trips, what it means to be in love.
you nudge him, softly, with the arm that’s tangled up in his own. tilting your head, teasing words on the tip of your tongue. ”you know, i never took you for a sappy drunk.”
suguru's only response is a cute little mmrn, steps heavy as he leans on you for support. trying his best to carry himself, not wanting to inconvenience you, but it’s just a little tough. especially when he feels this soft, this grateful — this blessed.
a giddy, dreamy smile tugs at his lips. his amber gaze travels up, towards the little pale dots of star clusters all across the night sky, gleaming like milk poured over rich coffee. then he exhales; a soft, blissful little sound. ”i’m so lucky.”
a moment passes, silently. in the distance, cicadas buzz. with a patient smile, you admire him, the reflection of starlight in his eyes. suguru has this forlorn look, etched into his expression, like he’s seeing something that isn’t quite there.
”i have satoru and shoko…” he mumbles, just loud enough for you to hear. as if he’s tasting the words on his tongue, as if he can’t quite believe them himself. that’s how lucky he feels, sometimes.
a nod. ”they love you a bunch, you know?”
(they do. they’re both horrible at saying it out loud, but you know they do. you know that they love suguru, just as much as he loves them, even if none of them are good at putting it into words. perhaps they don’t really even need to, in the first place.)
suguru mirrors the soft nod of your head, bangs falling over his eyes as he does. ”and i love them, too.” his smile grows. ”they’re my best friends.”
absently, you reach a hand out, brushing away the strands of hair obscuring his vision. and suguru stirs, his gaze shifting until it falls on you. like a moth to a flame. there’s something indescribable in his eyes, soft and heavy and tender and true.
”— and i have you.”
a stutter of your heartbeat, a jolt throughout your chest. his stare almost burns, but you can’t avert your gaze — suguru looks positively lovesick. admiring you with a dreamy gaze, as if he can’t believe you’re real.
he reaches a hand out; cradling your face with one big palm, the rough pads of his fingers smoothing down your skin so very gently. smearing his fondness from your jaw to your cheekbone, so loving your breath hitches in the back of your throat.
a soft, content sigh spills into the air, like a prayer that doesn’t need any words. his smile is serene.
”my angel.”
as the words fall, that peaceful smile of his changes shape, shifting into a big, giddy grin. it lights up his whole face. a chuckle leaves his lips, content and delighted. ”i’m the luckiest guy in the world.”
and for a moment, you fear that your heart will stop beating entirely. frozen, listening to the lullaby of your heartbeat resounding in your ears.
suguru has always been frighteningly good at flustering you — but isn’t this a little unfair? you clear your throat, hoping to regain some composure. it’s tough, though. your words could never measure up to his, could never flow as freely, but they’re honest. wholly and thoroughly. and maybe that’s enough.
”we’re the luckiest in the world, too, then,” you echo, smiling, words barely above a whisper. willing yourself to meet his gaze. ”since we have you.”
suguru looks into your eyes. there’s starlight inside them, he thinks, shining brightly, gleaming in the dark. with the hazy filter of intoxication clouding his mind, it’s all he can think. you’re his northern star, his lighthouse. his one and only saving grace.
(you’re so, so pretty.)
a pause. after a silent moment, spent etching your features into his retinas, suguru tilts his head. his expression is unreadable.
— he boops your nose.
you blink. once, twice, caught entirely off guard; and suguru giggles. soft, giddy little breaths falling from his lips like marbles, strewn over the sand of a warm beach. his eyes are crinkled at the edges, and his smile is sweet, meeting your surprised gaze with a honeyed coo. ”you’re so cute, baby.”
silence. you look up at him.
then you sigh, exasperated, more flustered than you’d like to admit. god. okay, he’s really out of it. for some reason, you still thought you could get a good one-liner in, but of course he had to ruin that by being a little tease.
you grab onto his bicep. gaze fixed straight ahead, giving it a tug. your steps are more decisive now, and suguru follows you happily. ”alright, alright. c’mon,” you beckon, slightly gruff. ”we’re almost there.”
when you finally reach the familiar front door of your apartment, you exhale a deep sigh, laced with pure relief. limbs tired from dragging suguru up the stairs, mind muddled and sleepy and senses practically engulfed by a man still clinging to you like his life depends on it.
after fumbling with your keys and hearing the click of the lock, you take a victorious step over the threshold, and a familiar scent greets you. soothing, comforting, a blend between fresh laundry and leftover curry and blooming hydrangeas. filling your senses with a fervent kind of bliss. of course, suguru’s does the same; intimately intertwined with the scent of home. that everlasting, never-changing blend.
with him clinging to you like this, it’s almost suffocating — but you truly don’t mind. suguru’s warm, and sweet, and being close to him like this makes you feel at peace. his hands rest on your hips, his jaw on your shoulder, and he adamantly refuses to let go of you for even a second. it’d be annoying if he wasn’t so cute, if he wasn’t suguru geto, if you weren’t so horrendously weak for him.
what you don’t know is that suguru has an agenda. one that isn’t just i want to hug the love of my life, although partially that as well. suguru has a plan, one he’s been absentmindedly dreaming of for the past five minutes; he’s a man on a mission.
but he’s patient. always has been, always for you. so he waits, and waits, for you to hang his jacket up, for you to kick your shoes off your feet. and when you’re finally, finally finished, suguru leans in to kiss you.
— you block his mouth with the palm of your hand.
a moment passes. silent, almost tense. in his stupor, suguru’s mind can’t quite seem to comprehend the situation before him; he doesn’t understand why he isn’t pressing a kiss to your lips, right now, why he’s kissing the skin of your palm. he doesn’t understand why you look so troubled, a faint guilt simmering in your eyes. he just doesn’t understand.
all he can do is blink, dumbly, surprised. a question written on his features clear as day.
”well, it’s just…” you sputter, sheepishly. avoiding his gaze, a little guilty. ”you know. since you’ve been drinking, and all…”
and it hurts, you think. it hurts a lot more than it should. it hurts to reject him, hurts to see the way he deflates at your clarification. like a big kicked puppy. like you just threatened to throw him out into the street.
suguru removes your hand, gently, holding it in his own as he speaks. those amber eyes are downcast, and a soft pout rests on his lips. the sight alone feels like a dagger to your chest.
”but…” he frowns, voice awfully meek. he looks so sad. ”i wanna kiss you…”
a soft sigh leaves your lips, before you can think to hold it in. oh, he’s being so unfair. guilt clings to your mind, an itch you yearn to scratch, and all you want is to kiss his pout away. but you really, really don’t want to kiss his alcohol-soaked lips.
so you settle for the second best option.
”’m sorry, sugu,” you coo, reaching a hand out to cradle his cheek. he leans into your touch, still pouting, and you tug a little at his bottom lip. wasting no time in closing the narrow distance between you.
the kisses you press against his skin are soft. peppering kisses all across his face; ghosting your lips along his jaw, trailing towards his cheekbones, and settling on his forehead. tiny little pecks, wherever you can reach. your voice is soft, muffled into his skin between butterfly kisses. ”tomorrow, okay?”
and suguru seems to brighten up a little, melting under the contact, exhaling in pure bliss. he fervently returns the treatment, planting open mouthed kisses all over your face, respecting your wishes and avoiding your lips. they’re a little sloppy, but you don’t mind.
it does make you a little flustered, though. with his palms cradling your face, engulfing you, there’s nothing you can do except drown in his affection, the love he showers you with. it tickles — and suguru’s smile only grows, at the sound of your soft giggles. his cheeks are starting to hurt.
the state he’s in is just a little bit hazy. despite his initial dejection, he no longer minds that he can’t feel your lips against his, disappointment warded off by your smile and laughter alone. he thinks you’re so, so cute, and all he wants is to kiss you forever.
but you have other plans.
and before you know it, you’re both curled up in bed, limbs all tangled up beneath the blankets, bodies pressed together as suguru cages you in. he squeezes you tightly, hugging you close, practically melting into you. usually, it’d be so easy to fall asleep like this. with suguru cradling you, covering your body with his own, warm and safe. he’s like a furnace.
but right now, it’s a little tough. you’re kept awake by open mouthed, ticklish kisses pressed against your skin, supplied by the love of your life. it’s sweet, but he’s being far too distracting — as soon as your consciousness begins to fade into the fuzzy realm of sleep, he leaves a sloppy kiss against your collarbone, and you’re jolted awake once more.
”suguuu,” you whine, dragging his name out with childish inclination. ”we need to sleep…”
”sorry,” he only murmurs, muffled into your skin. he doesn’t stop, though, planting a wet smooch on your cheek, and then another. you squirm a little in his hold, and he emits a shaky breath. ”jus’ love you so much…”
suguru knows that he needs to stop. he knows that both of you need to sleep, that you need to rest up. that he needs to recover from the intoxicated state he’s fully aware that he’s in — but he just can’t seem to follow through with it. every cell in his body burns with a certain desire, a need to shower you in love, and it’s unendurable. with every kiss, every giggle he manages to pull from your lips, suguru’s heart fills up just a little more.
your presence surrounds him, like a weighted blanket, and he clings to it with a desperation he never knew before you.
in the midst of his feverish consciousness, you’re all his muddled mind can think about. the way you fit together with him like a puzzle piece, like he was formed in the shape of someone meant to hold you. like you were formed in the shape of his embrace. with you pressed up against him, limbs tangled with his, everything feels so right.
but it’s so overwhelming.
you’re so, so close, so close he’s practically engulfed by your scent, your touch, everything that makes his heart burn with devotion. it’s beating so viscerally in his ribcage, stirring the protective instinct inside him; he just wants you to stay close, by his side, wants to keep you safe and happy. wants to make you feel loved.
suguru’s heart feels wet and raw and bare, fully exposed for you to see. beating just for you.
with the alcohol inside his veins, and the nostalgia of the summer evening on his mind, everything weighs on him just a little too heavily. everything feels just a little too much. every sensation, every emotion, every sappy thought. all of it together is almost too much for him to handle.
all he can think of is you. how lucky he is, to have met you, to have gotten to know you. how much you’ve changed him, changed him for the better, how much of him is directly tied to your existence.
suguru never truly appreciated his name until you came into his life. it was always no more than a simple fact, a gift from his parents that he hadn’t asked for. something natural, that he didn’t question, didn’t think about.
but you say his name with such warmth.
he wants to hear you say it, over and over again, forever. suguru — in that sweet, lovely voice of yours. better yet, just sugu, a cutesy, silly nickname he could never bring himself to actually hate. he just wants to hear you call out to him, with that warmth of yours, the one that never fails to soothe him. no matter how tired he is, how stressed. how much everything else weighs down on him.
at the end of the day, he’s simply your sugu. and that’s all he ever really wants to be.
with a hazy filter clouding his senses, coaxing him into closing his eyes, suguru should give in. he should fall asleep, let you fall asleep. but he can’t bring himself to stop thinking about it; he just loves you so wholly. who you are, what you do. as an equal, an individual, a little galaxy tucked into a body made of flesh and blood. no matter what you’re doing, no matter where you are.
and right now, you’re here, with him. curled up in bed, in your shared apartment, inhaling the same air, exhaling at the same time. by his side, when you could be anywhere else in the world.
his heart is yours. that’s all suguru can bring himself to think, the only coherent thought he can cling to and echo in his head. his heart is yours. forever and ever.
he makes no attempt to stop the tears from pooling in his eyes, even as he feels them cling to his lashes, even as his breathing clogs up in the back of his throat. they’re proof of his devotion, his carefully nurtured love. growing over the years, into something almost sacred, a kind of faith. something so fervent he wouldn’t dare deny himself of feeling it.
he can’t hold in a faint sniffle, either, just barely audible. one that breaks your heart in two. it aches, aches, aches. suguru is gazing at you with glassy eyes, a sight you aren’t used to seeing — but he also looks so genuinely glad. his tears aren’t ones of sadness. you know, because you know him.
”aw, honey…” you coo, the pads of your fingers reaching out to cradle his cheek. despite your efforts, your voice wavers when you speak, little more than a whisper. ”don’t cry... you’ll make me cry, too.”
suguru places his larger palm over yours, choking on another sniffle. the sight renders you completely helpless — you want so desperately to stop his tears from falling, but a part of you is too touched to speak. too mesmerized by how beautiful he is, translucent tears illuminated by softly flickering moonrays, lashes glimmering like shooting stars.
all you can do is smooth a thumb right under his eye, wiping away a stray tear with enough tenderness to stitch his heart back together. suguru emits a shaky breath.
”’m sorry,” he sniffles, closing his eyes. nuzzling into the crook of your neck. ”i’m just so happy… love you so much… you mean so, so much to me, i…”
an exhale, a little breathless, tears soaking through the material of the shirt you’re wearing. his shirt. that realization makes him cry even more, a shuddering breath that shatters like glass when it drops from his tongue.
and then, in a voice so quiet you barely hear it, a soft whisper worth a million words:
”i don’t know what i’d do without you.”
and it hurts. your heart aches so sincerely, thorns curling around your ribcage, because suguru is crying, and he’s telling you all this. with such an honest intonation that you don’t dare doubt him, even for a second. heavy thumps of blood rush through your veins; he’s still clinging to you, sniffling into your neck, and you’re so in love with him that you almost can’t comprehend it.
all you can do is press a kiss to his shoulder, chaste and tender, and hug him just a little tighter. echoing his words, in earnest, desperately trying to keep your voice from breaking apart. ”i love you, too. more than anything.” a sigh, full of wonder. little butterfly kisses scattered across the expanse of his neck. ”you mean the world to me. honestly.”
with a smile against his skin, you hope so tenderly that the soft kisses will comfort him, will stop the tears from falling.
”my sweet boy,” you murmur, lovingly, because he is. the sweetest boy you’ll ever know. suguru shudders when you press your lips against his jaw. ”i’m so, so lucky.”
with the combined efforts of your kisses, the alcohol slumbering inside his veins, and the tears running down his cheeks, suguru begins to feel awfully tired. sinking into sleep’s embrace, like a sailor lost at sea. comforted by the glimmer of a lighthouse, just out of reach.
everything feels right. he’s safe, and happy, and in love. so hopelessly, blissfully in love.
the exhaustion creeps up on him, tidal waves embracing a shore, beckoning him into closing his weary eyes. a yawn leaves his lips, and he shifts a little in your hold. you’re smoothing down the back of his head, almost protectively, and sleep is only a flicker away for the both of you. with the last of his strength, suguru snuggles just a little further into you, nose pressed up against your neck, close enough that he feels the flutter of your heartbeat.
”wanna be with you forever,” he murmurs, sleepily, stifling another bout of yawns. his smile is sweet and dreamy. ”gonna marry you one day…”
a moment passes.
for a second, you think your heart does actually cease beating entirely.
swallowing a gulp, you allow yourself the luxury of an inhale — and fresh air fills your lungs. grounding. all you can hear is the rapid beating of your own heart, heavy thumps reverberating in your ears. warmth flows through your entire body.
marry.
the word is spoken so casually, so sincerely, as if he’s said it countless times before. as if he’s repeated it, over and over again in his mind, just to get used to the idea. as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. marriage. something so foreign, so scary, enough to send shivers down every narrow of your skeleton. such a large step to take.
(but suguru says it with such tenderness.)
”… okay,” you whisper, at last. breathless. ”i’ll be waiting, then.”
there’s nothing else to say. you don’t know if suguru is even conscious enough to hear you, let alone understand the full weight of your words, of his own words. but you don’t mind.
a soft smile lingers on your lips, as you stroke his hair, mind hazy and limbs heavy. nuzzling your cheek against the side of his head, full of affection. dripping from your hands down to the column on his throat, through his windpipe, down to his heart.
”goodnight, sugu.” you press a kiss to his messy hair, tender and chaste. ”i love you.”
an incoherent mutter leaves his lips, in response, one you can’t quite make out — but you don’t need to. because you already know what it means, in the same way you know that the sky is blue.
(an echo buried deep within his subconscious, voiced without effort, as easy as breathing.
i love you, too.)
the sizzling of a pan and the whirring of a coffee machine form a beautiful morning symphony, bouncing off the walls of your kitchen. to your ears, and your still sleepy brain, it’s a soothing sound — coaxing soft little melodic hums from the depths of your throat.
with such a tantalizing aroma in the air, a blend between espresso and pancake batter, you can’t help but buzz with a mellow, groggy kind of joy.
honestly, you're beginning to understand suguru’s fondness for the morning hours. waking up to his soft snores and content expression was more than enough to give you the energy you needed to get out of bed; all sleepy and relaxed and pretty, with hazy morning sunrays kissing up his bare skin, caressing his messy bedhead.
a rare sight, awfully precious. a part of you wanted to stay in bed and admire him all morning, but the thought of taking care of him coaxed you into leaving. it’s the least you could do, really — after seeing him so sincere, so open and vulnerable.
hopefully, his headache won’t be too brutal when he wakes up. you left some hangover pills on the nightstand, courtesy of shoko’s advice: just get him ibuprofen and coffee. works like a charm. are you a little worried about her nonchalance? maybe. but you trust her judgement. they’re a handful, but you love them — even when they’re drunk or hungover.
which is why you’re standing in the kitchen, engulfed by the morning sunlight, in front of a sizzling pan. trying your very best not to burn the pancakes you’re making, patiently waiting for the coffee to be done.
in your blissful stupor, caught up with thoughts of suguru and breakfast and forevers, you don’t notice another presence coming up behind you.
two arms wrap around your waist, and a jaw attaches itself to the curve of your shoulder. you startle, a little, jolting at the contact — but then you recognize that telltale scent, the familiar weight of his arms, and immediately melt into the embrace.
suguru breathes out a raspy chuckle, amused at your surprise.
a sigh slips from your lips, content. ”good morning,” you hum, placing the palm of your hand on his forearm. suguru shifts a little, getting more comfortable as he leans against you. tenderly, not too much weight. he’s delicate like that.
”g’morning,” he rasps, leftover sleep clinging to the syllables. the usual smoothness of his voice is coupled with a deep, rough kind of tilt, one that always accompanies it in the morning. your heartbeat picks up, silently.
suguru smiles. dreamy, giddy, because you just looked so pretty, in the morning light, hair still a tad messy. humming happily, swaying slightly side to side. so irresistible. he’s beginning to understand why you love sleeping in so much; getting to wrap his arms around you like this, instead of the other way around, doesn’t feel bad at all.
he squeezes you just a little tighter, hoping it’ll convey his gratitude. there are holes in his memory, last night no more than a blurry sequence of still images, but some bits and pieces remain intact. he remembers getting drunk in a way he hasn’t since he made that bet with satoru back in high school — and he remembers that you were there to take care of him.
a smile tugs at his lips. a little giddy, butterflies erupting in his chest. he’s so damn lucky.
”thanks for taking care of me yesterday, sweetheart.”
a hum. you smile, sheepishly, patting his arm. ”don’t need to thank me for that. how do you feel?”
suguru smiles. you feel it, against your skin, a chaste kiss on your neck. ”better.”
the low purring of the coffee machine has stopped, but the sizzling of the pan remains. from beyond the opened windows, you can hear the chirping of cicadas, melodic and serene. singing a summery tune. both of you soak in the preciousness of the moment, the fragile silence, before suguru breaks it.
”everything from last night is kinda fuzzy,” he admits, clearing his throat. just a tad sheepish. you simply hum, a low noise of acknowledgement, and he continues. ”i don’t really remember anything… ’m sorry, baby. i hope i didn’t make you uncomfortable.”
your lips curl up into a tiny smile. such a sweetheart — always worrying about you. always so caring and attentive. eager to reassure him, you smooth over the skin of his arm with your thumb. ”not at all.”
then you’re taking a couple steps back, moving from the stove, and suguru follows. you turn yourself around to meet his gaze, his arms still attached to your waist, a comforting weight.
a grin blooms on your lips, a little teasing, and a flicker of mischief shines in your eyes. ”you were cute, you know.”
suguru blinks, before emitting a low chuckle. a raspy little thing. ”was i?” he drawls, as you brush his bangs away from his face.
”mhm,” you chirp, eyes crinkled as they meet his own. you just can’t help but want to tease him, a little bit. just a smidge. ”kept going on and on about how much you love us.”
hands moving to cup his face, you squeeze his cheeks softly. and suguru lets you, too tired to resist, only giving you a lazy raise of his brow. there’s a sense of amusement in his eyes, and something in you knows he likes the attention. your teasing words buzz with endearment, akin to a purr. ”my sweet lil’ sugu.”
all he does is lean into your touch, allowing himself to melt into the tenderness of the physical contact. even as you pull at his cheek, earning you a very gentle pinch to your side. but he lets you have your fun. you’re warm, and sweet, and he’s so in love with you he’d probably let you tug his body around however you please.
still, your words leave him just slightly perplexed. he’s still smiling with half-lidded eyes when he asks you to elaborate, basking in the feeling of your thumb smoothing over his cheekbone. ”us?”
your grin widens, by a tad, something deeply amused glimmering in the depths of your iris. ”yep,” you answer, popping the p. for some reason, suguru dreads the teasing edge to your voice. ”me, and shoko, and satoru.”
a moment passes. he stiffens, for a second or two, mind processing the words. then he groans, softly, squeezing his eyes shut.
it makes you laugh, soft and amused, and he can’t help but smile along. despite the dreadful realization you present him with. no wonder he was met with so many notifications when he tapped at the screen of his phone — he didn’t read through any of them, but now he’s apprehensive to do so at all. shoko and satoru can be so goddamn obnoxious when they feel as if they have blackmail on him.
he can see it now, in his mind’s eye; shoko nagging him to run her errands, satoru reminding him of his words every time they have a slight disagreement.
(grab me a coffee. three shots of espresso, one cube of sugar. got it?)
slacker.
(we both know i’m right. don’t be so stubborn, suguru! it’s okay to be wrong sometimes.)
asshole.
(c’mon. you said you loved me, right?
so mean. and here i thought you loved me!)
idiots.
(he does love them. more than anything. even when they’re being absolutely insufferable.)
suguru just sighs, deep and fatigued, already anticipating his doom. ”they’re never gonna let me live it down, are they?”
a giggle slips from your lips, and his heart flutters helplessly. ”probably not. my condolences.”
another sigh. it only makes your smile widen. there’s something awfully delighted, in your eyes, as you cradle his face in your hands. ”well, i thought you were very sweet!”
”yeah, yeah…” he mutters, vaguely amused. placing one of his large palms over your hand, where it rests on his cheek. ”i won’t be doing that again anytime soon.”
a chuckles bubbles up from within your throat. ”aww,” you pout, giving way to a teasing grin. ”that’s a shame. i wanted to hear you talk about how much you love me again.”
suguru blinks.
then he smiles. a very particular smile, characteristic, one you’ve come to associate solely with him. resting somewhere in the intersection between a soft grin and a teasing smirk. a flicker of mischief shines in his eyes, and you realize your mistake.
you can tease suguru all you want; but he'll always turn the tables on you, at the end of the day.
”oh?” he chuckles, fondly, thumb smoothing over the lines of your hand. his eyes gleam, looking straight into yours, shining with something mildly devilish. ”i don’t need to get drunk to tell you that, baby.”
in a smooth motion, one you can’t help but silently envy, suguru intertwines his fingers with yours and brings your hand to his lips. he never once breaks eye contact, gaze heavy as he basks in your flustered expression, planting a soft kiss against your knuckle. reverent.
”i love you. more than anything,” he purrs, lips still lingering on your skin. warm enough to burn. ”you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
a pause. heat crawls up your spine, and a flush rises to your cheeks. you couldn’t stop it if you tried.
”my everything,” he continues, intent on flustering you as much as humanly possible. voice low and smooth, honeyed and deep, and worst of all; terribly earnest. lips trailing over your knuckles, against every knot, so soft that you barely feel it. ”my entire world.”
”okay, okay!” you sputter, an embarrassed hue to your cheeks, your gaze landing on the windowpane to your right. his stare is just too heavy, too deeply in love. overwhelming. ”point taken. nevermind.”
suguru laughs, genuine and full. warm and amused, deep and real, and you catch yourself thinking that you don’t want to go a single day without hearing it. even if it’s at your own expense.
a coo rests on his the tip of his tongue, but he bites it back, opting to lean forward instead. he trails the pads of his fingers along your jaw, touch like a butterfly, lifting your chin up ever so slightly. then he closes the distance between you.
in your throat, your breath hitches.
— but he doesn’t kiss you. suguru stops right in front of your lips, so close you can feel his breath on your skin, taking a moment to simply look into your eyes. and despite how flustered the close proximity makes you, you can’t bring yourself to look away. heart fluttering madly, a string of staccatos against your parted ribs.
a tilt of his head. amber eyes gleaming, crinkled and fond. ”can i kiss you, now?” he asks, grinning softly. hand smoothing down your hip, big and warm, teasing. ”i made sure to brush away all the alcohol. or do you still not want to?”
you pause.
”hey, what happened to not remembering anything?” you pout, narrowing your eyes. the corner of suguru’s bottom lip twitches upwards.
but he only shrugs, feigning nonchalance, a playful glint in his eyes. ”guess i was just that disappointed.”
a giggle flows from your lips. he drinks it in, gazing at you with pure contentment.
”alright, alright... c’mere,” you coo, smile honeyed and sweet. tracing your fingertips along his jaw, brushing a silky strand of hair behind his ear. you take in the sight of him, meeting his lovesick gaze. he squeezes at your hips softly, a little impatient — so you finally lean in.
suguru’s lips are warm, when they meet yours. they taste like sunlight, devoid of any alcoholic flavour, just like he so kindly assured you of. and it’s a little amusing, the thought of him in front of the bathroom sink — desperately scrubbing his teeth, just to get his kissing privileges back. such a dork.
he’s your dork, though.
suguru sighs into the kiss, smiling giddily, satisfied at last. a sound you can’t help but mirror. he deepens it, ever so slightly, fingers squeezing gently at the plush of your waist. a hum of approval buzzes in your throat, and his smile only grows.
when he pulls away, that smile is all you can see, along with the ever so slight flush to his cheeks. a hint of peach dusting his skin, framed by the sunrays caressing his jaw, highlighting his handsome features. breathtaking.
before you have a chance to protest, he’s leaning in again, to press one more chaste kiss to your lips. your heartbeat picks up.
everything finally feels just right.
the warmth of the sizzling pan, the fragrance of freshly made coffee and now-burnt pancakes. the light of the morning sun, scattered across the open space of your apartment, splotches of life painting everything in a heavenly glow. the love in the air, all soft and light and comfortable.
domestic bliss. with suguru, who never seems to change, no matter how many years go by. if you could live in this moment for the rest of your life, forever and ever, you’re sure you’d die happy.
and wow, is that a heavy word. forever.
(but suguru makes it feel so very, very light.)
forever feels a lot more real, like this. cradled in the midst of a drowsy morning, bumping elbows with the man you love most, after getting to take care of him in his most vulnerable state. accepting every part of him, and having him accept you just as fervently.
just this moment alone is worth far more than you could ever comprehend.
suguru, with his warm hands, his familiar embrace. your shared laughter, bouncing off the walls of the kitchen as you try in vain to save your scorched pancakes. and his smile, his fervent devotion, coaxing him into eating them even though they��re burnt at the edges and don’t taste even a quarter as good as his. because you made them, for him, and that makes them taste sweeter than anything.
you stare at him, from across the table, admiring the sight you’ve grown so used to; suguru, with his slightly tousled hair, mug in hand and smile painted on his handsome face. drowned in sunlight, pink petals flitting in through the opened window. you don’t want a single day to ever pass without you seeing this. what does that mean, exactly? you think you know.
it means forever.
(forever, forever, forever. what a pretty word.)
marriage. you think of it, again, let it linger in the depths of your skull, bounce around until you grow just a little more used to it. and it’s a scary thought, for sure. a terrifying thought, even, something so foreign that it makes you nervous. but you truly wouldn’t mind doing this forever — not one bit. not if it’s with him.
and, unbeknownst to you, maybe that promise of forever isn’t all that far off.
maybe it’s only a couple rooms away, hidden within the depths of a certain drawer, until suguru finally gets the courage to bring it out. and maybe, just maybe — that day isn’t all that far off, either.
(suguru smiles at you, from across the table. he thinks you look ethereal, sipping from your morning coffee, blinking tiredly. so sweet and angelic.
all he can think of is forever.)
#finalllyyyyyyy took the time to finish this r u proud of me 👉👈#im very very soft for this sugu in particular :< kinda takes place in the same universe as the breakfast sugu fic !!!!#he’s ur smitten husband-to-be <333 i love to see suguru geto thrive and be happy i think being a househusband could save him#geto x reader#geto x y/n#geto x you#jjk fluff#geto fluff#geto suguru x reader#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk x y/n
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Lips Sealed - Jack Hughes
summary: when jack rights his wrongs it makes this years trip to the lake house unforgettable.
request: yes/no
warnings: sexual themes, p in v, thigh riding, swearing, fireworks, alcohol.
word count: 4.09k
authors note: firstly to those who read the sneak peeks thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me with this one! @babydollmarauders I hope what I’ve done to our idea has met your expectations. This is my first smut with a plot alongside it so let’s all play nice and act like it was well executed, okay?
The lake house had always been the best part of your summers.
For as long as you could remember the joyous memories belonged to that house. Being back with your friends and your brother after spending months meant that your mind was at peace “good morning to you too.” Jack smirked as he leaned against the wall of the kitchen.
It made you shriek as you jumped “Jack!” You groaned clutching your chest as you stood up straight. The boy laughed as he watched your Michigan maize baseball jersey fall to your sides as it covered your ass “sorry princess.” The hockey player smiled as he walked over to you “just came to see what the noise was in here.” He explained taking a berry from the bowl in your hands as the boy stared down at you.
Your cheeks turned red as the open jersey complimented the yellow bikini that you wore “just me.” Your voice was soft as you tucked your hair behind your ear watching him lean against the counter “feel like I haven’t seen you alone all week.” Jacks lips formed a frown as he held his arms out to hug you.
Ever since you were younger Jack always did have a soft spot for you “all you had to do was talk to me.” You pointed out as he had been catching up with Trevor as you did the same with Luke “wanna go for a ride then so we can do that?” Your chin rested against his chest as his offer lingered in your ears.
The boat was the true corner stone of the lake house, the boys got to use it as their moment to truly relax and be boys. You on the other hand lived for the laughter you got watching your best friend and your brother miserably fail at water skiing “I’ll even teach you to drive.” Jack proposed finally offering you the opportunity you couldn’t say no to.
Just as you had assumed the rest of the house was captured in a deep sleep probably brought on by their indefinite hangovers “let me help.” Jack placed his hat on your head as his hand went to help you onto the boat “really?” You weren’t complaining that Jacks locks were now free but you couldn’t help but send him a glare as the hat was too big for your head “Trevor would kill me if you came back burnt.” His words made you laugh as you threw your head back.
The idea of Jack having any kind of fear of your brother made your cheeks hurt as you tried to keep quiet going towards your normal seat on the boat “wow you’re really trying to get away from me that fast?” The hockey player teased making you stop in your tracks “meant it when I said I’d teach ya to drive.” His hand extended to yours.
You stared at the single seater that Jack sat on first “you know I don’t bite.” The hockey player joked as he helped you onto his lap making you straddle his leg as you faced the wheel “I’ll help you lead you.” Jack’s voice was soft as he let his chin rest on your shoulder.
Just as Jack had hoped it took you a few minutes to relax as you loosened up allowing the sounds of the water hitting the boat to scratch an itch you didn’t even know was in your brain. But with each hit the boat had on the water it made your legs tense around Jacks and with that your clit would hit different his thigh as your hips would readjust against him “oh.” Your lips fell open as it was now his turn to tense his leg beneath you.
Jack pressed his lips against your shoulder “you’ve gotta stop moving like that.” Jack warned as his cock throbbed at the against his swim shorts “like what?” You mumbled as you the the boat come to a stop.
It was a lightbulb moment that Jack had as he smirked “you never gotten off on someone’s thigh before?” He watched as you began following the movements that his hands had you doing “nope.” You moaned slapping your hand over your mouth as your eyes widened at the feeling.
Your legs shivered as the feelings went straight to your core and up your spine “you trust me?” Jack asked brushing his fingers over your cheek making you nod “use your words baby.” The hockey player cooed making your brain feel as though your were melting.
Your tongue ran over your lower lip “of course I do Jack.” You smiled as the boy grinned “need you to face the front then.” Jack sent a nod to the people in front of you both “if you really wanna be a good girl for me lose the panties.” His words made you moan as you nodded following his request as you crouched down to hook your fingers into your bikini bottoms pushing them to the floor before you got back to his leg.
Jack leaned his head against the headrest of the chair as he watched you straddle his thigh “just follow my hands.” The hockey player cooed pressing his fingers against your hips “Jack.” You moaned as your clit grazed against his skin.
Your soaked cunt spread its wetness over his thigh “fuck you’re doing such a good job.” The mirror of the boat became his best friend when he could take in how your face contorted when your clit hit his skin at a different way “please.” You begged wanting to move quicker now desperate to come.
Of course though you should have known it wouldn’t have been this easy “god you’re so needy already.” Jack laughed as he tried to adjust himself in an attempt to ease the pain his cock felt “keep soaking my thigh with your pretty little pussy.” The hockey player used his energy to lean forward to kiss your shoulder.
The jersey had fallen off of your arms as you kept your head upright “such a gorgeous girl aren’t you?” His teeth sunk into your skin causing a loud moan to fall from your lips “naughty girl, we gotta keep quiet.” Jack clicked his tongue making your face feel warm as it turned red.
But as your thighs clenched around his leg it made Jack laugh “but maybe you want to be caught?” Those words made you whine as you writhed against his leg “that’s it.” He smirked pressing a kiss on your earlobe.
In an attempt to tease you Jack began to bounce his leg making your breasts bounce “use my leg and I’ll make you feel so good when you come.” It made you cry as your legs began to shake “I’m gonna come.” You announced letting your head fall against his shoulder.
The nature of your words turned him animalistic as Jack sped up the movements of your hips “go make a mess on my thigh my pretty girl.” Jack kissed your jaw as you came “god!” The hockey player slapped his hand over your mouth muffling your moans as your legs squeezed his thigh.
As your chest heaved Jack laughed watching you come back to earth “wow.” You forced the word from your lips “I know.” He leaned down to grab your panties as his phone went off ruining this moment you both had.
Jack frowned as he saw it “we gotta get back before they notice.” The boy explained making you nod “just give me a sec okay?” You pleaded sliding your swim bottoms onto your legs.
The ride home was quiet as Jack focused on the path ahead of him leaving you alone now back on your own seat. Meaning that you spent your ride home drowning your brain in fears that caused you to feel sick as you docked “let’s maybe keep this quiet okay?” Jack wrapped his hand around your arm.
It made you want to throw up as you scoffed “like I’d go tell the boys what happened.” You grumbled pulling away from him.
It was a weird mix of embarrassment that mixed with disappointment as it became clear to you that Jack thought so lowly of you. To go from having him being your world as a kid as everyone but Jack could see the crush you had on him. To then becoming friends with him only to find yourself on the boat like this had your world shattering around you “god I need a drink.” You clicked your tongue as you helped yourself off of the boat not wanting to wait for him to do anymore to your ego especially not whilst your orgasm still had you feeling vulnerable.
Jack didn’t know why he said what he had done and as he watched you throw his cap on the ground during your walk back to the house it made him rub his hand over his face “y/n wait!” The hockey player pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration as he got up and tried to make up ground in getting to you “bro you will not believe what I found!” Unaware of how you went straight for your bedroom when you got in Trevor wrapped his arm around Jack forcing the conversation he wanted to have to wait.
The next few days all ended in the same ways, you avoided Jack who didn’t allow himself to look like he cared as he prioritised worrying about what the boys might say. It wasn’t that Jack was ashamed or embarrassed, but instead it was the fact that he couldn’t get the moans that left your lips and the way your eyes screwed shut out of his mind. So in essence, letting the boys in on that secret would have had to mean that Jack was admitting it to himself that he actually did indeed like you.
But those thoughts weren’t the ones that went through your mind as you spent considerable amount of time trying to plan how you wanted to screw with Jack. You knew it was childish but Jacks attempt to silence you only served as a purpose for you to get back at him.
That was how you landed up in your red bikini and shirt you stole from Luke at the beginning of the trip “stop it!” You giggled splashing Cole with water from the cooler as he poked at the skin of your leg “what’s so funny?” Jack asked walking out to see the amused look on your face.
It frustrated Jack to watch you wrap your hand around Cole’s arm “just Cole being Cole.” You caught your lower lip between your teeth as the younger boys eyes trailed down your body “Z wanted to know if you would go with him to get fireworks.” Jack lied through his teeth as he smiled.
Trevor did most things with Cole meaning that it wasn’t unbelievable that your brother expected his friend to go along with him “I’ll see you in a bit.” Cole sighed squeezing your hand before he went to head back into the house.
Jack should have known it was too easy as the door slid shut “what are you playing at?” You asked crossing your arms as you sent the Hughes boy a scowl “what do you mean?” Jack shot back as he raised his eyebrows.
You couldn’t help it as you laughed “you dragged me to the store last week to get the damn fire-” what you didn’t expect was that you were silenced by Jacks hand as it went over your mouth for a second time, with this being so drastically different from the first.
He glared as you lay your tongue flat against his palm making sure to lick his skin “god!” Jack shrieked grumbling as he wiped his hand on the fabric of his shorts “okay I hid them is that what you wanted to hear?” The hockey player didn’t see the problem as it was the Fourth of July so that meant fireworks weren’t something you could have too much of.
Your eyes turned to sharp lines as you began to compose your thoughts into clear words “look I know you feel like we made a mistake.” You cut yourself off as you sucked at your teeth staring at the ground “but that’s in the past so can you just let me move on?” Your fingers raked through your hair as the frustration was evident on your face.
Seeing that you were feeling similar emotions to him it made Jack frown and stand in silence “that’s what I thought.” You clicked your tongue shaking your head as you walked to the door thinking that if you were quick enough maybe you could catch the boys “y/n please.” Jack begged placing his hand on your shoulder.
The look you sent him was one he truly never thought he’d get from you. Not only were you irritated but you were also disappointed, and it was disappointment only directed at him “we’ve only got a couple more days together so let’s play nice.” Your words were a clear contrast from your facial expressions as you glared at him “stay out of my way and I’ll stay out of yours.” You added slipping through the gap in the door leaving the boy with a lot of things on his mind.
To be honest Jack didn’t like that offer, he hated that you wanted to keep him away. So the only thing Jack could think of was to do exactly what you didn’t want him to do, Quinn contemplated calling his brother your shadow as he stayed by your side for the rest of the afternoon and even as meat was on the grill cooking for dinner.
The glares you sent the middle brother didn’t go unnoticed until you both ended up fighting over the last beer in the cooler “let go Jack.” You warned gripping the neck of the bottle “why don’t you go get one from the kitchen?” Jack tugged it back staring down at you.
It was a stupid fight that had gone on for far too long as you both constantly pulled it back and forth“why don’t you!” As you gave it a final tug it sent you and the bottle backwards to the ground and as luck had it the cap of the beer all of a sudden shot off hitting you with the rest of the beer that was in the bottle “fuck!” You gasped feeling the cold sticky liquid soak your body.
The boys silently watched on as you got up shaking your head “nice talking to you dickhead.” The white fabric of your shirt stuck to your red bikini top making you cringe as Trevor’s reaction matched yours “you get your eyes off of my sister right now!” He warned making you look down at your top.
Jacks eyes had followed yours as his mouth watered “I’m gonna get changed.” You mumbled dropping the bottle to the ground as you walked to the porch “okay what the hell happened on that boat?” Luke sent his brother a glare as Jacks eyes only left you once you slid the door shut.
The middle Hughes boy sighed “stay out of it!” Jack groaned as he pushed past his brother “where are you going?” Cole complained seeing that another person had disappeared from the dinner table “to get that fucking beer!” Jack spat as he shook his head following hot on the trail you had.
Frustration coarsed through your veins as you peeled the shirt off of your chest “that little dick.” You grumbled grabbing the wash cloth from your bathroom as you heard the bedroom door open “I’m busy!” You complained setting the cloth door as you looked to the door.
Jack locked eyes with you riling you up all over again “go have that beer Jack.” You grumbled placing your hand on his chest as you tried to force him out of your room “god you are infuriating.” Jack mumbled as he was stronger than you only moving back to the point where his back hit the door.
You stared at his lips before yours moved back to his eyes “at least I’m not the one who acts fucking bip-” Jack cut you off as his hands cupped your cheeks before he kissed your lips.
This wasn’t like anything you had ever experienced as he pulled away for a second to scan your face for any protests that you could have made. But as they didn’t come Jack let his lips capture yours once more “Ja-” you moaned as the hockey player pressed his hands against your waist as he walked you both back to your bed.
As the back of your knees hit the mattress you both fell onto your bed “I hate you.” You grumbled as the boy hovered over you “shut up.” Jack rolled his eyes as he hooked his hands under your knees pushing you further up your bed.
His lips moved to your jaw as all of the anger he had built up about the situation fizzled away with each kiss as Jack let himself nip at your skin “fuck Jack please.” Your body felt on fire as his lips moved down to your collar bone “taste like a fucking delight.” Jacks voice sent shivers down your spine as he moved back to stare at your bikini that barely covered your perky nipples.
If the sound of music from downstairs wasn’t currently echoing through Jacks ears as you had left your window open he would have taken his time but before you could complain the triangles were pushed to the side as the boy lowered his head around one and used his fingers to tease the other. Your hand tugged at Jacks longish locks that you once thought you hated but now as you used it to help steady him as he swirled his tongue around your nipple you were in awe “fuck Jack.” You repeated those words a few more times when the boy realised how responsive your body was to his movements.
But as always the irritating deadline Jack found himself came to the forefront of his mind as he was reminded of the fact that he told the boys that he was only getting a beer “would wanna taste this cunt of yours but we don’t got time for that.” The desperation in his voice was brought on by his painfully throbbing cock that rubbed against his shorts “and besides it seems you’re already ready.” The boy smirked seeing the wet patch that had formed on your bottoms that were now on full display for him to see with you out of that shirt.
His hand cupped your cunt making your squirm “you know I could leave you in here with that.” You warned as you sat up “we both know you’ve been waiting for a proper orgasm for too long to do that.” It was irritating how right Jack was as he sat on your bed again lips mere millimetres away from yours “show me you can be the one to give it to me then.” Your challenge had Jack thinking that he had been dreaming all along and that couldn’t have been real.
Yet as you sat there with a smirk on your face ready for accept this as a win Jack had to be the one to stop you “take those off.” Jack got up as he undid the drawstring of his waistband only to look up and see that you hadn’t moved “take it off before I rip them off baby.” His tone was harsher finally making you comply with him.
The pile of clothing was quick to form as your eyes trailed down Jacks body desperately noting how each part of him looked “god you’re so fucking beautiful.” He gasped staring like you were the only girl on this planet “c’mere.” You mumbled opening your legs to allow Jack the space to slot himself into.
It didn’t take him long again to have his lips find yours but this time his free hand that wasn’t holding his weight was instead directing his cock over your clit “fuck.” You moaned allowing his tongue into your mouth as your head fell back “you’re so wet.” Jack let out a grunt as he tilted his head down to watch as your cunt swallowed his cock.
Your hand squeezed at his arm “jesus!” You even felt your toes tingle as he bottomed you out with such ease “just you and me in here pretty girl.” Jack jokingly corrected you as he began to move his hips back and forth denying you of the opportunity to snap back at his lousy joke.
Jack felt your body relax as you adjusted to his size “please Jack.” You begged bringing your knees up on either side to make his angle more enjoyable for you “like this pussy was made for me.” Jack felt himself feel every part of your cunt “gonna make sure that I fuck it good.” His words ended with another kiss on your lips as it quickly turned into Jacks drug that was like his oxygen.
Lust clouded your mind as you attempted to drive your hips against his “look at you trying to get yourself off on my cock.” The click of his tongue was playful as your cunt clenched at his words “what would Z say about his little sister being this desperate.” The squelching noise that came after his thrusts made you moan as tears formed in your eyes feeling his full length inside of your aching core.
You struggled to come up with the words “h-he can’t.” You stammered as a sparkle danced over his eyes “then you gotta keep quiet princess.” Jack brushed his finger over your lips as you nodded. He watched your eyes begin to flutter just like they had done so on the boat “you close?” His head dropped to your shoulder where the hockey player began scattering innocent kisses on your skin.
The needy moan that left your lips made him smirk “feel so full.” You huffed as Jack slid his hand between your bodies “you feel me baby?” He pressed against your lower stomach causing the feeling of his thrusts to intensify “that’s what I want you to remember the next time a guy tried to fuck you.” Jacks words were only met with a whine that grew louder as he let his fingers hit your clit.
You chewed at the inside of your cheek “this pussy is yours Jack.” You shook your head at his words unintentionally making him smirk “you wanted to let me ruin you for all other guys then?” His breath fanned the shell of your ear as Jack used everything in his power to make his thrusts quicker.
A cry hit your walls as you pushed your head into the pillow “be a good girl and milk my cock when you come okay?” Your throat went dry as you nodded “I’m gonna-” your legs began to shake as your body looked like it was going to give out from under Jack.
He was right behind you as the pressure he had on your clit increased “let it all go my pretty girl.” You didn’t need to hear anymore as your eyes screwed shut and your hips continued to writhe against his thrusts “fuck!” Jack kissed your lips as your cunt clenched around his cock causing his orgasm to him as he attempted to fuck you through yours.
The two of you lay there for a few seconds until his thrust’s completely slowed and his cock slid out of your soaked cunt “you hear that?” You asked as you heard fireworks from outside as you looked to see that it was dark outside now.
It made Jack smile as he nodded “get dressed and then we can go see the end of it.” The center offered making you smile as he helped you out of your bed “you okay?” He added pressing a kiss against your lips as you nodded.
As you were both totally unaware from down below you sat the boys as they watched the fireworks with their meals on plates on their laps “how much do you want to bet they finally slept together?” Alex’s words made Trevor choke on his food “please y/n has way better taste than that!”
#Jack Hughes imagines#jack hughes x y/n#hockey smut#nhl smut#hockey imagines#nhl imagines#imagines#oneshots#amber writes fics
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genuinely interested in your thoughts about ruin now that everythings going on-
I THINK RUIN IS A FANTASTIC CHARACTER AND A MOTHERFUCKING DELIGHT.
At the very beginning, he grated against me in a real unpleasant way and even during his "cured" arc I was on the fence about him for a while, but now? Now he has enraptured me mind, body, and soul. He's genuinely almost on-par with how I feel about Eclipse n Bloodmoon n Lunar n Solar Flare. He's becoming one of thee blorbos.
There is just something about his nonchalance that itches my brain scratch so good. Like yes of course I have the deaths of billions attatched to my name, but thats just the unfortunate sacrifice we have to make for peace, no? Even with so many innocent people caught in the crossfire, I have saved billions more. I have done the right thing, even if no one around me sees it. I have done a good deed. LIKE SIR WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU 😍
ESPECIALLY BECAUSE ITS SO PERSONAL THATS WHAT I RLLY LIKE. He has committed a multiversal crime because his own creator doomed him from the very start, so he went "you know what? fuck you and all your variants." LIKE WHAAAATTT!!!! THATS WILD. COULD YOU IMAGINE IF A LUNAR TARGETED AND KILLED EVERY ECLIPSE BECAUSE OF THEIR OWN ABUSE? IF AN ECLIPSE HUNTED DOWN EVERY MOON? BATSHIT STUFF, DUDE, ABSOLUTELY WHOLLY BATSHIT.
And don't even get me STARTED on his acting UGHHH someome made a post talking about how servant Eclipse said that all Eclipses are good actors AND I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING ABOUT IT. ALL ECLIPSES!!! IT WAS SO OBVIOUS FROM THE START I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HE'S THE WORSTTTT AAAAHHHHHH
And with him being kidnapped now recently I hope that things only get worse for him because FUCK if it isn't entertaining to watch him be in pain wohoo <3<3<3!!!!
#asks#helinedmightbethere#I LOVE HIM SOOOO MUCHHHH#he is WILDLY ENTERTAINING TO DRAW AND WRITE TOO#he has a certain level of prose to everything he does and it has me EMBARRASSINGLY in love LMAOOOO#even with his lying and acting habits he is still silly to his core and his ''true'' self still has the whimsy that i adore on him!!!#i love him so much. as my good friend kat once said. i love his mad scientist energy i hope i get to hear him scream ^_^#sun and moon show#the sun and moon show#tsams#sams ruin#tsams spoilers#sams spoilers
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⠀⠀⎯⎯⠀⠀⠀ yours ⠀· j. hong
⟡ note : i’m trying a new layout out ? anyway. this is a continuation ? of sorts ? of my beloved soulmate!au… i’m still so happy it was received so well. thank you to the lovely anons who asked for this. ^_^
⟡ wc : 1.5k. reader’s perspective this time. enjoy :)
it’s been a year since then, but you still can’t shake the feeling that you know him from somewhere.
because you’ve heard of soulmates. of red string, of fate, of instant connections that happen on pure coincidence that last for years and years to come, but you’re sure it’s not any of that. not even close.
that rainy morning in that small café sparked an itch in your head you can’t seem to scratch no matter how hard you wrack your brain for any time you might have seen him before. you know it’s partly ridiculous, because you know you haven’t seen him before, but the feeling still stubbornly persists.
that’s how you find yourself peering at him curiously as he floats about your apartment, hand tousled hair and wrinkled sleep shirt a testament to his highly disheveled appearance. you wonder how he seems to know where you keep everything—not once has he asked where you keep your mugs or the sugar or your baking necessities. alarms should be going off on all fronts, but you feel strangely at peace.
it should scare you. it doesn’t.
“penny for your thoughts?”
warmth wafts under your nose as he places a cup of coffee just within reach. you don’t have to bring it to your lips to know he’s made it just how you like, again without asking.
“i feel a bit strange,” you admit, and his brows raise before settling into the seat across from you. your fingertips drum against the surface of your countertop. “i still can’t help but feel like i know you.”
“we’ve been dating for a few months now.” his response is murmured over the rim of his mug, expression coy even in his relaxed state. “i’d be a little upset if you didn’t know what my favorite color was.”
someone asked me what my favorite color was today.
really? did you say something expected like green? you seem like a green person. specifically sage green.
i’m going to take that as a compliment.
don’t be a smartass. what is it! and don’t say something cheesy like the color of my eyes, or something.
my favorite color is now sage green, then.
“love?”
you shake your head and blink, glancing down at the hand now laced with yours in concern.
“my eyes,” you mumble, and something in his expression makes your heart climb into your throat.
joshua smiles faintly and squeezes your hand once. “that’s right. finish your coffee or it’ll get cold.”
you dream of vanilla and soft linens. of laughter and self made lanterns. of whipped cream and kisses in the dark and the familiar weight of his hand in yours.
it’s not your body. but it is at the same time.
he’s the same every time.
you startle awake still smelling sugar but only find yourself in bed, his arm draped over your middle in deep sleep. moonlight still streams in cut patterns across your shared room.
you still can’t shake that odd feeling of deja vu.
you were never a serious fan of grocery shopping before him. the long lines always made you put it off until you absolutely needed to restock, and you had no patience to wait until time crawled by enough to allow you to set your wants on the conveyor belt. the clerks always looked like they didn’t want to be there, trapped in the endless hamster wheel of work, work, work—a better life dangling in front of them like celery hung from a string—and you could relate. you didn’t want to be there, either. crowds had never suited you well, and if one more mom looked at you pitifully as you inspected the vegetable aisle in mild distaste, you were seriously going to lose it.
“the best time for grocery shopping is in the morning, silly,” he told you once you’d voiced your opinions, mirth dancing in his eyes. “grocery shopping is peaceful when you know what times to avoid the major surges.”
you had laughed, moving to resting your head on his shoulder, and didn’t think much of conversation since then. but without telling you, he’d cleared your schedule out, going as far as to wake you up at six in the morning. the sun bled colors in bright brushstrokes and the sharp chill of the cold window against your cheek helped you stay awake.
breakfast is sweet and you watch the sun rise and finally color the sky a pretty light blue. he peers at you curiously and you brush pastry cream from the corner of his lips.
and of course, he was right. but he didn’t need to know that.
arm looped in his, you find being tugged along as he pushed the cart didn’t seem to be that bad after all. ambient noise fades into the background with the gentle music playing over the speakers, and there isn’t a single crying child in any aisle.
joshua glances over to find content displayed openly on your features and laughs.
are the watermelons even ripe?
i really couldn’t tell you. my mother somehow always knew, though. she had good intuition like that. we’d have smoothies and fruit pops and melonade.
melonade?
mm. watermelon lemonade. it’s really good, i’ll have to make it for you sometime.
i’ll hold you to that.
we need to find some good ones, then. is your intuition any good?
“is your intuition any good?”
“what?” he stops in his tracks, forcing you to stop with him. “what was that?”
embarrassment floods through your body like wildfire. “sorry. i just—never mind. it’s stupid.”
“is it?”
his gaze is heavy. almost stripping you bare, and you feel it’s far too early to have a crisis in the middle of the vegetable aisle. you look away, heart thundering in your chest. what is happening?
“we should get some watermelon,” you say instead.
“whatever you want. fruits are in the next aisle.”
waves brush past your feet. sun kissed skin and seagulls call overhead. his sun hat sits perched on your head and you laugh when he waves from deeper in the water. the drink in your hand is sweet and familiar. music spins a soft tune nearby.
stolen kisses in a library. saturated reds and oranges cast pretty shadows against your skin. sunlight peeks and glints on the rings that adorn his fingers and you’re reminded of where you stand. of where you both stand.
run away with me. arguments. tears. the sound of the wind brushing past your ears on horseback. the cold stings. your fingers are numb and your heart hurts. i can’t. it’s not right.
is any of this right?! i don’t want this. never wanted any of this. i just want you.
you can’t look at him. can’t bear the sight of him at all. not like this.
i’m sorry.
you’re not sleeping. he worries. you know he worries, and yet slumber is not your friend and it laughs when you close your eyes and try will it nearer anyway.
“are you hiding anything from me?”
“never.” his voice is hushed. he stands on the other side of your room, motionless. “i would never—”
“i have these strange dreams. of me, but not-me. and you, but not-you. but i’ve only just met you, so i don’t understand and it’s driving me insane.”
you shove your shaking hands under your thighs and look out of the window. his gaze burns against your bare skin.
“what do you see in your dreams?”
weddings. star-crossed lovers. love that bends time and space itself. the same hand that slipped a ring on your finger, over and over and again and again.
you’re an artist in one. royalty in the next, merfolk in another, stars, bakers, gods, and so on. you don’t understand how you remember memories of lives you know you haven’t lived but still feel anyway.
“who are you?”
he crosses the space between you two, then.
“yours.���
you promise?
there’s a reason why we keep finding each other. i don’t know why, but it feels like the universe likes pushing us in the same direction, however that may be.
i always forget you. or about you. whichever. i’m sorry.
i think that’s the price. a new life is the start, finding you is the journey, and helping you remember is the price.
and the reward?
i already have it. waking up with memories of you is the biggest reward i could ever be given. it helps. during the times when i’m alone and i don’t have you.
i’m sorry i don’t remember. i wish i could.
don’t be. knowing i’ll find you one day and get to fall in love with you over and over again, however you come back to me, is more than enough.
“do you remember now?”
fresh tears fill your waterline. you do. you do, and everything falls back into place—the nagging feeling disperses and is replaced with warmth.
“yours,” you breathe. he coaxes your hands out and squeezes them firmly.
“welcome back, love.”
back home ⟡ the archive ⟡ join my taglist ⟡ last post
#k-labels#seventeen#seventeen x reader#seventeen x y/n#seventeen x you#svt#svt x reader#svt x you#seventeen fic#seventeen fics#seventeen fluff#svt fluff#svt fic#svt fics#svt joshua#seventeen joshua#joshua#joshua x y/n#joshua x you#joshua x reader#joshua fluff#joshua fic#shua’s archive
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Merlin x Reader (RSATSD)
Part 2
My deep, dreamless sleep swam around my healing body, warm and coddling.
That was until a sharp, loud scratching dug it's claws into my head, dragging me back up into consciousness by my ears. Erratic thumping and clinking jump-started my heart that, just moments ago, was peaceful and slow.
The claws sunk into my brain as it fully peeled my body from any rest I'd cocooned myself inside of.
I lifted my head, trailing the phantom claws sunk in my head as I struggled to open my eyes.
The horrid scratching didn't stop, in fact it only got more and more aggressive. I snap my half lidded eyes towards the window, only to see the familiar flock of crows trying to break in.
Dazed and pumped with a sudden adrenaline, I stumbled out of bed and followed my hurrying feet towards the annoying birds.
I slammed the windows open on them, knocking the closest one unconscious and causing it to fall to the ground. The crows scattered almost immediately after their brethren hit the ground like a bag of rocks.
The morning sunlight poured in through the window. The sky was painted an optimistic pink as a light blue haloed the bright colours of a clear morning.
I groaned and rubbed the heel of my hand against my eyelid, rolling the sandy sleep from the corners of my eyes. I pulled the window shut before lazily shuffling back to bed. Only then did I notice that all the dwarves were huddled under the blankets of their respective beds.
The silence suddenly held a power over me I couldn't ignore.
I stealthily tiptoed back towards my bed, seating myself like a feather back onto the mattress and started to tug the perfectly warmed embrace of the cotton sheets over my shoulders.
As the blankets settled on my chilled body, I felt an alert consciousness. I tracked the feeling and turned behind me. To my dismay, it was the sorcerer next to me. His brown eyes were cold steel against my skin.
I matched his expression sourly. "What?"
"I know what you are." He said quietly, totally and unnaturally still.
"And I know who you are." I whispered, flopping my body down onto the mattress, snuggling deep into warm sheets that smelled of sawdust. "Who all of you are."
Our eyes were locked, waiting for the other to make a mistake, one wrong move to give the go ahead. It was clear Merlin was itching for a reason to kick my ass out of here.
Unfortunately for him, I lost any inkling for a fight the longer I stared at him. "So... what happened to you?"
His eyebrows cranked farther down into his eyes. "Well, if you know who we are, you should already know how this happened."
I deadpanned, pulling the blanket closer to my body. "If I knew I wouldn't be asking."
He stayed silent, his mouth pressing into a tight sneer. The silent morning flowed by for long enough for me to understand that this conversation was over.
The blanket shifted around me as I turned my back to him.
"...If you do anything to hurt my team, I'll kill you." He uttered darkly into the silence. The firmness in his voice scraped against my nerves in such a way all my joint's calcified, and my skin numbed despite the cold electrical shocks just beneath. This was no threat, but a sincere promise.
It took almost all of me to not give into the urge to dive out the window and never be seen again, but I wasn't a force to be reckoned with either.
The drumming of blood flooding my ears seemed to serve nothing but the perpetual fear now circulating in my body. "If you try anything against me or Red, that curse you have now will be remembered as a blessing." My voice was flat, casual, but singed by a fire deep inside that if set upon the world, wouldn't be something to be scoffed at.
That was enough of a safety guarantee for me as I settled my heart beat, watching the new day-glow press it's light to the wooden beams within the ceiling. Consciousness became harder and harder to hold onto until the lasts strands of the waking world lovingly slipped from my grasp, sending me back into my dark pool of peace.
____________________
CHAPTER 2: Forest Magick
____________________
The second awakening of mine was much less terrifying this time around. The summer sun was comfortable in its rise, at least four fingers above the horizon as its beams warm the foot of my bed.
With a slow stretch my senses collect together, carrying the scent of something sweet and buttery on the air. My eyes crack open into the warmly lit room with an achey spine and a rumbling stomach.
I slowly sat up to find I was the only person left in the shared bedroom. Convenient for me, now I can put my salve on in peace.
I slip the white dress off my body and take a generous amount of the salve from its tin, slathering along my spine. The aches and flecks of pain fizzle away within the spicy tingling. As it dried I hurriedly dig through my bag for my change of clothes. Whatever that heavenly smell was coming from was mouth watering, I either have to have it or have to get out of here before I lose my mind.
I pull on a fresh under dress that rests off the shoulders followed by a mustard yellow skirt that falls to just above my ankles. I didn't bother lacing up the white sleeves and instead focus my effort into lacing up my stays while I wandered the room.
Once the stays were secure I sit back down on my bed, lacing up my boots before finally picking up my bag and exiting the bedroom.
That was almost the wrong choice as once the door opened a waft of that delicious fluffy smell hit me like a ton of bricks falling straight to the bottom of my stomach. A growl emitted from me as I submissively followed my nose down the stairs and into the living room by the front door.
If I weren't so hungry the scene before me might have had me way more embarrassed for the men then it did.
There sat Snow with the entirety of the cursed F7 doting over her, desperate for her attention and affection. Little Merlin seemed especially hungry for the woman's eyes to stay with him as he spoke quickly to her. Of what I couldn't be bothered to try to know, but it was blatantly obvious she was having trouble listening as her stare kept wandering towards a plate full of... full of...
My mouth began to water slightly at the sight of four, maybe five slices of French toast coated in cinnamon, nutmeg, and powdered sugar, decorated intricately with ripe fruit of strawberries, blueberries, blackberries, and the odd apple slice.
Hans spotted me and lit up. "Ah! Good morning Y/n!" He greeted happily with a jug of steaming syrup held in his hands.
The others all turned to look at me.
I grinned back and flounced towards him, eager and hungry. "Good morning."
"How was your sleep?" Pino asked, almost nervously.
I grabbed myself an ottoman and pulled it up between the triplets on a couch and Arthur in a recliner. Coincidentally, I was also sat straight across the coffee table from Snow and Merlin, the latter of who was glaring death upon me. "Really great, the cotton was a dream." I mused in my sweetest most innocent tone, successfully getting the sorcerer more riled up. "I hope it wasn't too much trouble, Pino." I mewled, demurely gazing at the eldest of the three. Merlin looked like he was going to foam at the mouth.
Pino's face exploded with colour. "Oh! It— It was really nothing! I'm happy to help!" He squeaked as his hat fell crooked atop his head.
I smiled at him, grabbing his hand in mine and giving it a kind squeeze. "Well, even so, thank you."
The poor man had to hide his face in the crook of his free arm's elbow. "I-It's— gulp— it's my p-pleasure—!"
I let go of his hand and immediately Niko shook Pino's shoulders in a small celebration. I slyly inspected Merlin who was only a second away from launching across the table and socking me in the head.
Despite the threatening electricity in the pooling air, I trusted that he wouldn't do a thing in front of Snow.
Well, nothing physical at least.
Snow noticed the pointed glare of Merlin's and quickly jumped into action. "So, Merlin, I'm sorry I didn't quite hear you before." She probed.
The little sorcerer easily pulled his glare into a soft, mushy smile as he looked to Snow again. "Ah right, of course."
I kept my eyes on them, only breaking my intense protective watch momentarily as Hans handed me a plate of French toast, much to my delight. I offer a quick thank you and slight bow of my head before going right back to making sure Merlin doesn't try anything. Sure, they're mostly nice enough, but there was something they were after from Snow. So as soon as I finish this food, we're outta here.
"I'll just cut to the chase. We've all talked about it, and if you're searching for your father and the F7, that'll simply take far too much time." He said with a shake of his head. An uneasiness in my stomach began far too late to intervene in whatever he was planning. "So, maybe we can help in place of the F7!"
Both mine and her eyes widened in shock. "What?!" She and I cried, far different in tone.
"Really? You'd do that?" She asked, as a smile began to spread across her face. She scooted towards the sorcerer to get a better look at him, as if trying to figure out if his eyes were sincere.
He flushed a light shade of pink as he sat up slightly, clearing his throat. "O-Of course! Afterall the F7 have been gone for a year, what're the chances they'll show up again now? That's just more work to do."
I thinned my eyes at him harshly as my arms fold over themselves. Is this slimy little skeeze ball really doing this?
"Well, more help can never hurt, huh?" She said with a charming grin, then looked to me. "This has been a pretty lucky couple of days for me." She chuckled, picking up her plate of French toast happily.
I guess more help can never be a bad thing.
My eyes drift to the blue tunic wearing turd.
I know for a fact Merlin will rat me out as a witch to his friends if I say anything about them being the F7 to Snow. Each of us only needs to do a little convincing and the protective veil is torn.
So, in the face of this blatant lie, I bit my pride back and looked away. "The more the merrier."
The men buzzed with excitement, a new glimmer of hope that hadn't been there moments prior became blinding in mere seconds. I had to look away to protect my eyes from the secondhand embarrassment radiating from the display. Unfortunately I had to subject my gaze onto a far more embarrassing sight in the form of crows zipping to and fro in the front. My eyes became saucers as I had to consciously keep myself from leaping to my feet in alarm.
My fingers dug themselves into the arm of the couch next to my rigid form as I anxiously stared out the window.
"I'll be right back." My mutter went unnoticed by everyone as I stood and tread out the door, taking the barely enchanted broom still by the entrance on the way out. Only a single pair of eyes followed me.
I slipped quietly through the door only for my ears to be bombarded by the shrill cries of crows in the tens in numbers. Some flapped and swooped down into my hair while others anxiously circled something farther down the way on the hill.
With fear and vigour, I swatted the pests from the air with the straw end of the broom. It worked surprisingly well as I cleared a perfect path towards whatever it was they were incessantly cawing about, only to leave behind a trail full of stunned birds on the ground.
There in the grass, swarmed with blackened feathers and inky beaks, laid the branch I'd left behind lasts night. The very same thing I nearly broke my spine for.
I begrudgingly swat the birds away and plucked the branch from the ankle high grass it was coffined by. The wood was pecked and splintered more than before. It's new texture made itself known against my calloused hands.
Within the moment of making contact with the branch, a gust stirred and fluttered against my body. An impromptu spiral of birds gradually summited an invisible line while keeping me within the typhoon of wings. The smell of magic; sour and zesty fell from every wing beat in a shower of life.
I stared up to the eye of the feathery storm. The deepened blue of the sky remained unobscured, funnelling some kind of deeper meaning down to me. Whatever this energy was, it reached down just brushing at the tips of my sky-bound fingers. The atmosphere was so kind, but terrified and selective. It was cold, but yearning to bless some kind of warmth onto the earth. The spiralling was nauseating as my palm reached farther towards the heavens.
"Hey!" A grating voice yelled out towards me.
Immediately the trance was destroyed as the crows all haphazardly scattered; the steady rhythm of wings became uncoordinated as the connection left me with a vague message and a lingering sense of dejecta memora.
A frustration burned along the bones in my back.
Merlin.
"What do you think you're doing?!" He griped, his voice encroached unpleasantly.
I collected my patience as best as I could as I kept my back to him. "Just taking in the sunshine." I held my snarl beneath layers of poisoned honey with a fixed gaze forward.
"Sunshine my ass!" He snapped, now only maybe a few feet behind me as his footfalls in the grass became easy to prepare for. "What was that?! And don't you dare try to lie twice!" He raged, shortly coming to a stop with an electricity sparking from him. Stray hairs of mine began to float unbound by gravity.
A frown crinkled my face before I whipped back around on him, readying both the broom and branch in separate hands. "It's none of your concern," I snapped, glaring down at him. Unfortunately, my hard stare faltered as a wash of alarm submerged me in a frigid realization. It numbed my being for a horrible moment.
His erratic aura, the lightning collecting and traveling along his arms in bursts and crackles, even his stupid little jacket. The very same shade as that patch of sky.
A dread set heavy in my stomach as it connected in my head.
The man eyed me for a confused moment, swiftly pointing his spell charm paper more accurately at me. "What?" He asked accusingly, distrust swimming about his darkened eyes. "What are you doing?"
The broom and branch slipped from my grasp and landed with a softened thuff. I groaned loudly and plopped my face into my hands. I wasn't intentionally being rude... well, maybe I was, but for fucks sake. This guy? You've got to be kidding me.
Confusion stared to sedate his aggressive suspicion as his spell charm lowered. "Uh..." He blinked a few times then quickly side glanced his surroundings before returning his eyes to me.
If only I had a shred of subtlety.
Slowly, I craned my heavy head back up to meet his inquisitive stare. His eyes scanned my slumped figure for any sign of danger that didn't come.
"... What was that?" He asked, as if prodding a sleeping beast.
I couldn't look directly at him otherwise this frustration would ignite into something far more severe. "I just—" My shoulders bobbed, "I hope we can get this over with soon."
That was about all I could say as I scooped the broom and branch off the soft grass.
The sorcerer's guard fell almost immediately as I walked around him, back towards the house. "Hey wait!" He cried out, trying to match my pace.
I cast a glance back at him with an annoyed grimace then set my sights back onto the house.
"I said wait!" His cold hand clasped around my wrist.
There wasn't even a second of contact before I wretched my arm from him and whirled back on him with a silent glare. One he easily matched.
"What happened out here? What did you see?" He demanded.
I scoffed, trying to ignore the crawling under the skin where he'd touched. "Strange that you're suddenly interested in my magic," I mocked, flippantly.
His eyes thinned up at me as his shoulders squared. "The fact that you're being so defensive about it is strange. Especially if it's nothing to be concerned about."
I jabbed a finger towards him as my face contorted into an annoyed scowl. "I wouldn't say it's strange being defensive when a crazed little goblin has an itch to fry me alive."
He looked aghast; insulted even as he took a half step back. "Goblin?" The surprise was short lived and a seething fury overtook it's place. "Not much room to talk when you'd steal a dead man's skin!"
Liquid rage pooled and swirled within me, rising to my head before I had any say in the matter. I threw the broom to the ground and held the branch tightly in both hands, pointing it directly at his heart. The end of my staff was void of any life, a vacuum that promised the worst. To my woe, he was just as quick; he aimed his index and middle fingers —with a spell charm trapped between them— for my heart as well with lightning visibly conducting along his body.
"Once again a sorcerer makes his ignorance known," I sneer down at him as I lift my chin a fraction. "For all the studying you'll commit yourself to, the idiocy in your class only seems to rise." The poisoned words were satisfying on my tongue.
A smug look played on his intense face. "Insults. As to be expected from the lazy and uneducated mind of a witch," He chided with a tsk.
My teeth grit and my knuckles whitened around the branch. Our auras clashed menacingly and horridly, a push and pull of two different oceans. Death waiting in a riptide to pull one or the other below it's turbulent surface.
"Stand down," he demanded, his eyes alight with electricity.
"I have nothing to lose," I scoffed, stabilizing the branch in my grip a little more. My eyes zero in and pinned him in place with a thin, calculating leer. "But you do, don't you."
He bared his grit teeth as his severe glare began to crack. Even if he didn't mean to, I could feel his resolve weaken, the strength he displayed became hollow, performative. He fought with his brain and his eyes flicked about me, gradually losing focus until finally and abruptly dropping his arms. A silence took hold as the lightning —along with its sizzling and popping— had completely disappeared back into his little body. He exhaled bitterly. "You'd be a waste of spell charm."
Despite my wanting to, I said nothing. His words didn't feel completely untrue, but his flustered red tipped ears added a layer of embarrassment to his claims. I lowered my new weapon, the void at the branches tip released back to the surroundings in thick unseen waves of negative energy.
The will to fight dropped dead in the water humiliatingly fast and only left the little green man red faced and angry. He sped past me retreating to his home while a fuming cloud of smoke was nearly visible as he stormed away. I kept a keen eye on him until he slipped back into the house, not once daring to cast a glance back at me.
Great. I have to stay here now, not just for Snow or a pardon, but for this little jerk too.
The cold grip of this new entrapment drew its fingers tighter against my skin, leaving behind frigid marks that only a witches eye could never spot.
I scoffed off a shiver and dug the end of my branch into the earth before me, desperate to ground myself. A few breaths and sheer will was all that kept me from completely giving in to the sudden uncontrollable rattling of my knees. Somehow this felt worse than always running away, especially now that running wasn't an option.
"Y/n?" Snow's voice called from the doorway, no more than thirty seconds after Merlin slunk back inside. I looked up from my feet dizzily. The weariness in my spent body suddenly felt childish. I hadn't even gone through with the soul stealing spell, merely conjuring it had me almost doubling over from exhaustion.
"Y/n!" She cried in alarm, rushing towards me with the other men trailing behind her as fast as they could. "What happened to you?" She asked as she fret about.
I waved my hand in dismissal before having to grapple back onto the branch propping me up. "Nothing. I'm just feeling a bit faint," I said through a breathless and shaky laugh.
The men all shared wary looks until Hans finally —hesitantly— spoke up. "Did... Merlin do something?" He asked.
My eyes widened for a fraction of a second. What a perfect setup! His dislike for me hasn't exactly been hidden, and now it could be utilized against him.
"In fact he did! He—!"
As I was about to elaborate on this soon-to-be intricate lie, but there was a sudden and sharp pang of guilt. It incessantly began needling into the flesh of my sensitive heart.
Condemning this kind of mark on someone's reputation (whose worst offence was being rude and irritating) and placing that mark within his closest circle of friends no less? That's... something a witch would do... something he'd expect from me.
Realistically this smear campaign would only set me back on whatever the fates had planned for Merlin and I's twisting destinies. So with a pinched nose, I wove a new narrative. "He noticed I looked a bit ill and went to fetch me some water."
Arthur's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really?"
The other men shot him sharp, wide eyed glares causing Arthur to clam up and look away. "Er— I mean... th-that seems like he'd uh..."
Jack rolled his eyes and stepped forward. "I suppose I'll clear the air." He stated with a flourish of his hand, flicking his cape back.
The beat of my heart picked up speed to reach a gallop. Did they know what I was?
"We are all quite aware that he doesn't particularly like you Y/n," Jack stated with his fingertips pressed together in front of him. "I can assure you, none of us hold any ill will towards you here."
I eyed him suspiciously and remained silent.
"Truly, I cannot understand why he's being so rude to a friend of Red Shoes," he said this almost annoyed, as if Merlin's actions where ruining something for all of them.
Ruining their image perhaps? I glanced towards Snow, who was standing next to me still looking me over anxiously.
Pino then spoke up with a fluttery voice. "I personally have no idea why he would be so cold towards you," he proclaimed with a shy finger in the air. "Y-You're quite lovely I'd say."
The others murmured agreements, far less genuine but far more eager in saying so. It was hard to believe they were saying this for solely my benefit as their eyes all wandered to Snow.
I forced a strained smile to pull across my stiffened face. "Thanks."
Snow finally couldn't take my pitiful state and swept underneath my right arm, taking some of my weight off my unsteady feet. With her hand pulling mine over her shoulder and her another arm around my waist, she lead me towards the house. "Come on Y/n. Let's get you off your feet." She instructed as I leaned against her, the six men staying close in tow.
Pino ran ahead and opened the door for us to step into the cool house. "Careful Y/n," He said standing to the side, keeping a close eye on me with his hands ready to catch me at any point in time.
A genuine smile lifted my lips, the first one I'd given since ending up on their doorstep. "Thanks." It felt like a momentous occasion that one of these men showed me genuine care with no detectable ulterior motive strewn within their actions.
As I hobbled past the home's threshold, Merlin was nowhere to be found. I suppose he wouldn't be keen on sticking around once I got inside.
Snow led me to the couch in the living room and sat me down. I immediately melted into the cushions fabric as my fatigued, ill body welcomed the comfort with open arms. "Thank you." My thanks to the woman was barely above a whisper.
Her face twisted at the sound as she stared down at me, a knuckle caught between her pearly teeth.
Pino spoke up as he grabbed a pillow from the recliner. "Is there anything you need?" He asked, handing the feathered pillow to me.
I smiled and graciously took it in my hands. "Thank you, but no, that's alright. This is really nothing to worry about."
"How can you say that?" Arthur butted in, "You can't walk, you can barely speak, and right now, you're struggling to keep your head up." He pointed out, short and blatant.
"Oh?" I hadn't even realized my neck was bowing back until he pointed it out. I quickly move to correct my posture only for it to deteriorate again mere seconds later. Despite the clear issues I was having, I had no energy or agency to try and explain it away.
He was annoyed. His lips pressed into a thin, disapproving line as he stared me down.
Snow quickly shifted the attention off of me. "Well, what's the plan for finding my father today?" She asked, pulling the mens eyes towards her as she stood straight up, towering over everyone.
The men all scrambled to speak. Plans began to get tossed about willy nilly with me and my odd ailment long forgotten. I offered Snow a tired smile before leaning back into the couch and letting my eyes heavily flutter closed.
I slipped into a restorative, dreamless sleep. Something about resting my bones after conjuring such a draining spell was addictive in its comfort. The voices around me fell away into muffles, then nothingness.
I could've sworn only mere moments had fled past when a harsh clanging of metal jolted me from the little rest I managed to grab. A shot of adrenaline coursed through my now racing blood as I sat straight up, gripping the couches arm rest harshly.
The banging came to an end as I looked about in a flurry, just for my eyes to fall on the little lightning goblin himself holding a pot and a wooden spoon. My eyebrows settled deep into my eyesight before I plopped my head back on the couches back rest and let out a long sigh. "What do you want now?" I grumbled out.
"For you to get up," he snapped, "Everyone has been out looking for Red Shoes' father for hours now except us, and that's because of you!"
I blinked my eyes awake before braving the ice of his eyes again. "Then why are you here? If you want to go so badly then go."
"If I could don't you think I would have?" He hopped off the coffee table and towards a little satchel by the fireplace. "I promised Red Shoes I was gonna watch over you, which I think I've done plenty of today." He sorted through the things in the bag for only a moment longer before tossing the satchels strap over his shoulder. "So since you've slept plenty, I think you'll have more than enough energy to help with the search." His tone was acidic as he wheeled back to stare impatiently at me.
A bored stare was all I could muster. "Uh huh..." My groggy head fell back again as I waved my wrist about lazily. "Just go without me, I don't need a baby sitter."
He bristled as his shoulder squared. "Unfortunately that's not happening," He fled swiftly towards the door. "I'm tasked with watching over you, and I have no idea what kind of magic you conjured out there before, but I know it wasn't good. So if I go and you suddenly die or turn into sludge as some kind of side effect, I'll be blamed for it." He pulled the door open. "So I'd much rather just have you in my sight where you can't go and mess everything up for me."
The faint smell of mountain flowers wafted into the home with the suddenly opened door. That was the only thing pleasant coming from that opening. I groaned heavily again and rocked myself forward to my feet. "Why do you care so much about what Red thinks?" I asked airily as I strode towards his suddenly stiffening frame. "Actually... why are you all so infatuated with her? It's well beyond a crush... it's... almost desperate." I noted thoughtfully.
He didn't respond, keeping his eyes locked sternly on me while holding the door, waiting in the middle of the open space.
I hummed slyly to myself as I grabbed my branch and trotted slowly towards the doorway. "I wonder if it has to do with this curse you find yourself under," I mused, bending at my waist to get a closer look at his face.
He glowered up at me, his knuckles became a whitish green on the door knob.
A mischievous grin lit up my face. "Ahh, I see."
He huffed and whirled away from me, almost slamming the door on my nose if I hadn't been fast enough in catching it. "You have no business butting into my affairs," He stated shortly. "Keep your long, warty nose out of it and I won't blast you into next week."
I shot straight up. "Wha-?! Warty?!" I cried out, absentmindedly touching my nose. A growl fled my chest as I stormed after him, slamming the door behind me. "That's rich coming from you, you little toadstool."
He ignored my dig at him, opting for a more peaceful approach. "How about we don't talk to each other and focus on finding Red Shoes' father," He suggested with a toss of his wrist over his shoulder.
A red hot steam blew through my body as I glared holes into the back of his head. "Fine." The word thread through clenched teeth.
The short man sped down the hill towards the forest that coddled the house in thick foliage. A blessing of shade was granted to our silent search party while I aimlessly followed him like an idiot. Only the forest's ambiance was bold enough to flow within the distasteful tension we held.
Still —even though he was a complete annoyance— I want to understand where his motivations lay. I wordlessly ask the mystics that may be around to offer some clarity into the strange little monster of a man's motivations, as well as his intentions. I breath my intention and wish of learning into the air as inconspicuously as possible, keeping my eyes on Merlin ahead of me who was too engrossed in his own winding brain to pay me any mind.
I kept my eyes and ears ready for any knowledge that may be thrown my way, scanning the perimeter, trying to drown out Merlin's heavy feet against the soil, and the far off cawing of crows. This was all for naught unfortunately, because Merlin spoke up again. "How come those crows are always following you around?" He asked sharply with the audacity to be annoyed.
I sneered at the back of his head and fired back with a question of my own. "Why are you so desperate for Red's attention?"
However, my irritation quickly left as quick as it came. There on the toe of my boot was an earth worm, and a long one at that. My breath hitched as the thought of the near drought floated into my head, a dry harsh spell that's been collectively holding the land hostage for the past few weeks. Yet here was a worm out of the soil and wriggling aimlessly about, and on top of my foot no less. A sign, and one that only confirmed my suspicions about him and his F7 friends.
So, he's opportunistic.
This wasn't much of a revelation, but helpful to know there were signs being sent my way. I had to keep up though so brushed off the little wiggler and I sped forward, landing back at the comfortable distance I kept behind him.
He dodged my question too. "Well whatever the case, can you shut them up? They're extremely annoying."
I scrunched my face as him bitterly. "Don't you think I would if I could?" I chastised with a shake of my head, "Those birds don't listen to a word I say, quite the opposite in fact. I have to listen to them."
A small, unmistakable croaking of a frog stole my attention. Again, an oddity to be out at this time of day. And within this dry patch of land in the forest, far away from any water or stream to swim in? Another sign.
He's confused and misguided.
Possibly tying back to his opportunistic tendencies. Is he confused and misguided because of these tendencies? Or are these tendencies a result of being confused and misguided? I suppose it didn't matter how it occurred, it just matters in knowing what this person before me is like now.
"Well maybe you should use some of your magic. Do something useful with it and banish them." He insisted, a deep frown creasing his face.
I scoffed at him. "You can't banish a magic that's a part of you. That's like cutting off your arm just because of a blemish. It'll cause more harm than good."
He rolled his eyes and sourly sneered back. "Couldn't be worse than their bloody crying." He waved his hand up to the bird flippantly as he trudged on. I opted to remain silent amongst the cawing flock, there wasn't a thing I could say that would make his mood better in the slightest anyway. After all, I didn't totally blame him for hating the crows. They were no picnic, and took years of practice to drown out.
I look back to the scattered multitude of birds following, flapping and landing from branch to branch through the trees. Even for me their noisiness was getting ridiculous.
Maybe I should at least try to calm them down.
I slow to a stop and face the crows, lifting my left palm towards them to receive what they were saying. (Saying is a strong word, it's more of a signal through intuition)
What is going on with you guys?
The flapping of feathers and chaotic cawing were difficult to sift through, the energy was so hectic. Not in warning though, it was more... excited? That was the closest word I could find to describe it.
"What're you doing?" Merlin questioned to my back.
"I'm trying to figure out why they're all freaking out so much." I explained, keeping my focus trained on them, searching for any answer to my question. It was just like they were talking over each other, nothing was decipherable in the slightest.
'One at a time please!'
Only message I could make out was 'hurry' or 'quick' all tangled up amidst the flock.
My brows pinched together 'can you clarify?'
The waves of cawing started to become overstimulating as they all became more and more erratic.
'hurry!', 'witches magic', 'fast!', 'follow!'
The hair on my arms stood on end as their messages began falling into place. 'Where?' I ask back.
Immediately the birds take quick flight towards the East, a sharp divergence from the path Merlin was leading us down. My heart jumped into my throat and I gave chase.
"Wha— Hey!" Merlin yelled after me, clumsily getting his footing to cooperate. "Where the hell are you going?!"
"They caught whiff of a witches magic!" I cried over my shoulder, ducking and hopping around obstructing branches and roots.
"And you're going towards it?!" He hollered, the scrutiny in his voice was near completely drowned by the fresh panic shooting through his body. Two witches is bad news for any sorcerer. I didn't bother explaining, he was already following me anyways.
The crows flew down next to me before scooping back up into the canopy. The sky's blue was that of an ocean and they were the fish jumping out of water as they led.
After hopping and ducking through the forests foliage, the faint scent of a familiar magic powdered itself on the air; spiced yet wintery. The trail became more potent the farther I ran, but Merlin was keeping a good pace behind me. He was far quicker than I'd expect from a little goblin, even gaining on me from what I could hear of his oddly long strides, "Wait!" He cried after me, trying to sound demanding in his tone.
I felt just on the cusp of finding the source of the magic when a large, cool hand grappled my wrist and pulled me back to a stop, yanking my momentum from my body stiffly. A yelp pushed out of my mouth, running free where my speed had dissipated as the thread to the magic is smelt began to become thinner.
I rounded back on Merlin and his hand felt small around my wrist. "What are you doing?!" I all but shriek down at him before anxiously looking out towards the rapidly diminishing trail.
His hand felt bigger around my wrist. "You're running towards another witches magic! Don't you think that's a little stupid?!" He snapped, his hand tightening around my limb.
"No!" Was all I offered as an explanation before turning back to him with a sharp glare.
"Why?! We're looking for Red Shoe's father! Not a witch," He pointed out, "plus, even if she's civil towards you, what do you think a witch is going to do when she spots a sorcerer in your company?"
A sudden reminder rolled over my shoulders. Merlin hadn't any idea who Snow really was, or by extension what her step mother, the Queen was capable of. "Remember when Red said her witch step mother did something to her father? The magic I smell is her step mothers!" Merlin's head tilted with a small pinch in his brows as thought began to fall into place. "So whatever's at the end of this smell is a clue, whether it's the step mother herself, or a trace that might point us in the right direction!" I yanked my wrist from his slowly loosening grip, only to grip his wrist in return. His eyes widened in alarm. "So shut it and let's go." I turned from him and ran again, frantic to pick the trail back up again.
To my surprise he didn't fight me further and instead —after a few seconds of stumbling— fell into stride with me.
"So what are we supposed to do if we run into this step mother of hers?" He asked pointedly.
"I'm a witch, you're a sorcerer. I think we'll have a good chance of fighting her off." I stated boldly and cast a glance back at him as he suddenly began to struggle to keep up.
"R-Right—! But it won't be the easiest fight if her magic is that strong from so far away!" He huffed out, attempting to find his footing.
I rolled my eyes and looked forward, "If it is her, we'll be fine," I lied. I didn't believe it was her, otherwise the level of confidence I held would be scraping the floor.
Merlin was no idiot to be wary if it was her I could smell from here. That in itself would be an impressive amount of magic. But this wasn't her, it was simply a trace of her magic. She isn't impressive, she's horrifying.
"You better know what you're doing!" He called out, running with his legs out in front of him, as if leaning back and letting me drag him forward. "I'm barely in the mood to deal with one witch, let alone two."
I didn't respond and opted instead to yank his arm forward, putting his weight back solely on his own sprinting legs.
The smell became overpowering as the crows cawed louder with less direction. It's close.
I hopped a tree trunk —one I kind of wanted Merlin to stumble over— and finally, finally a large wooden rabbit stood there calmly sniffing about the dirt.
As I came to a stop Merlin flung around me due to our connected arms, coming to a soft footed stop with heaving lungs a bit ahead of me.
Both of our heavy puffing and sudden appearance took the rabbits attention easily. He stared at us both oddly and sniffed our way.
"So... thats what you're looking for?" Merlin asked, looking back to me before his eyes dropped to mine still around his wrist.
I quickly dropped my hold on him and nodded. "Yeah, yeah that's... that's the source." The rabbit was spiced in magic, just as Snow was with those shoes. But this wasn't the end of the similarities.
He squinted and blinked as his attention pulled back to the rabbit. He heaved a few steadying breaths as his eyes inspected the giant wooden animal, hands resting on his hips, "Huh..." he turned to me. "This doesn't seem very helpful."
The rabbit sniffed them hopped closer, his nose twitching like crazy in our direction. I couldn't look away. The rabbit —far beneath the layers of alteration magic— held a likeness to Snow.
A staggering likeness.
"Merlin." I said as my eyes stayed straight ahead.
He turned to me, confused.
I locked eyes with him. "That's her father."
His brown eyes widen for a fraction as they fly to the rabbit then me, then the rabbit again as his shoulders slump. "... you've got to be joking."
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Meditation and ADHD
Now, I know what you may be thinking seeing this: "Corvid, I can't meditate! My body won't let me!"-- I can tell you now, confidently, that you're meditating wrong if you think meditation about the emptiness of your mind and doing nothing.
When you feel your muscles are weak, what do you do? Exercise them. Your brain is no different then the rest of your body-- You need to 'stretch' or exercise it to make it stronger. Though I'm not talking about doing word puzzles or even listening to music, which are proven to improve brain function. We're here to talk about meditation and how you can start to work meditation into your daily life.
Disclaimer: I myself have ADHD and these tips and tricks have worked wonders for me. If they don't for you, try a different approach.
Start off slow. Set a goal of three to five minutes a day. It'll seem like a lot at first but gradually it will get easier. If your thoughts wander or you can't sit still, don't worry-- This is completely normal. The goal is to merely observe your mind and how it functions and bring yourself back to focus when you notice it wander.
With that being said, please give yourself grace and leniency. Throughout your session, you may want to fidget or stretch, scratch that itch or count the black specks in the grout of your tiled kitchen floor. It happens. Instead of abandoning or saying that you failed, be kind to yourself and just continue. Scratch the itch and return to calm; stretch and maybe find a more comfortable position. Even if you feel you 'failed' the session, keep up with it and keep trying.
Find what you deem as a comfortable place to meditate. You could sit in your favorite chair, you could lie down with your favorite blanket, etc. You should loosen the tension in your muscles and make sure they're relaxed. If you cannot comfortably sit still, try a repetitive, 'autopilot' task like going for a walk. My favorite (and easiest) thing to do is focus on my breathing and the breaths I take. Some people listen to music. In time, you'll figure out what you find comfortable.
Being in a comfortable space also means pay attention to what you're wearing. It may be harder to let your mind relax if the waistband of your pants is digging into your skin or your sweater is itchy. The same thing goes for earrings that pull down on your ears too much or shoes that feel tight. Wear what you find comfortable and lessen the distractions.
When you notice your mind wandering from you in the moment, simply acknowledge the thought and return your attention to your task (walking, breathing, etc). Accept that minds are meant to think and give yourself permission to have a wandering mind. Don’t judge yourself for having thoughts or focus your attention on them.
Quiet is relative. Not everyone has a peaceful environment so the goal is to lessen the distractions as much as possible. Turn off your phone, close your bedroom door, put pets in another room, whatever you can and need to do.
When your session is complete, don't just jerk yourself back to reality. Give yourself and your body the time it needs to come back to the present. Doesn't matter if you meditated for one minute or one hour, take your time-- If your eyes were closed, slowly open them; if you were on a walk, take an extra couple of minutes to get home; etc.
Find a body double-- If they're willing to meditate with you, that's amazing. If not, have them hold you accountable for the task and make sure you do it. Set up a regular, daily time to do so and use one of the many meditation apps out there nowadays.
The take away that I hope you get from this is that you don't have to clear your mind or be blank or not move an inch. Allow yourself to do whatever you feel you need to do and then return back to the mindfulness that is meditation. Be kind to yourself and don't 'should' yourself; I never said this would be easy, I just said it was possible.
#witchcraft#witches#witchy#baby witch#baby pagan#beginner witch#witch beginner#how to meditate#meditation#meditation guide#adhd#adhd culture#neurodiversity#neurodivergent#neurodivergent witch#neurodivergent witchcraft#pagan#paganism#witches of the world#witches of tumblr#pagans of the world#Pagans of Tumblr#spell#spells#spellwork#spellcaster#magic#magick
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I'm drunk and I just want to say, that my love for Astarion is real yo. He might not be real, but my feelings are real. You feel me? When I think of him, my heart just swells with joy. He fills me with a sense of peace I've never gotten from my real relationships. I am cringe, but I am free. I know it would be healthier to give all of this love to a real person, but there are no real people in my life at the moment, so this is a welcome respite for me. Thanks to all the joy Baldur's Gate 3 has brought me, I've been able to kickstart ending my marijuana and nicotine addictions, and have significantly cut back my drinking. I'm doing great at work and have been promoted to manager so I'm making good money. I'm finally getting back into art and writing again after my PTSD robbed me of that gift for 4 years. I'm thriving.
Even my therapist is like, gurl you go right on ahead and love on Astarion, you deserve to finally be happy after all you've been through. Any moment of happiness I get, no matter where it comes from, is a victory at this point. My entire life has been hell. She gave me the stamp of approval and said what I'm doing is totally healthy and a-ok. Well, don't mind if I fucking do, then. I've had crushes on fictional characters loads of times before, but simping over one that has 9k+ lines of dialogue is a new level of immersion that just totally hijacks my brain. I can't wait until AI and VR get advanced enough that I can be totally lost in the fantasy sauce. I think some people just need that to function at times, and that's okay. I'm still open to real relationships, but I have a lot of work to do on myself first, so for now this will scratch that itch. I'm not stuck thinking about my deceased boyfriend so much anymore, I finally have a distraction. I can finally rest. I'm finally doing okay, and I'm grateful BG3 showed up in my life when it did. It's not just Astarion, I love the whole game, I love my found family of companions, I love the story, I love the setting. I just wish I could live there, but maybe I can find some magic in my own little world eventually.
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Time for: Another random midnight ramble
Even though we’ve seen so little of him throughout the fic I just LOVE the way rise Raph scratches an itch in my brain that makes me melt. Like- he’s just so understanding and definitely the most well adjusted when it comes to mentality and maturity, not just in being an adult but also emotionally.
He understands that things are at a standstill, and knows to leave well alone. Whereas Leo and Mikey still have two very different and more childlike and immature mindsets when it comes to Donatello.
Leo is paranoid, he is certain that Donnie would never change for anyone that he is not going to stop hunting them and scaring his brothers beyond repair. His immediate hostility keeps Reader and potentially Donatello at bay. They’re both very similar in that way and it would take one of them to take those walls down for the other to follow suit and even then he will still be paranoid.
Mikey in the other hand is the opposite, even if he knows it won’t happen he desperately craves Donatello to be part of the family it’s why he invited Reader and Donnie to stay for coffee and croissants. He takes in Donnie’s advice even if it may be condescending and treats it like gosspel. He wants him to come back around and even if he doesn’t understand it I believe that it’s part of the reason why he reached out to Reader in the first place. He CRAVES that connection, after all it is what brought Draxum into their family unit and start a villain rehab program. He sees the best in people whether it be to his detriment or not.
Raph on the other hand, he’s a middle ground of peace. He is weary of Donatello like Leo, he is skeptical and frankly doesn’t want the conflict to start again. But like Mikey, he’s not throwing him out the second he can, which leads me to think he had similar hopes to Mikey. He also wants that connection even if he doesn’t know it. They all do, they’re all just on different levels of it some being more bitter than others that they couldn’t reach it.
The best way to put it is acceptance. He’s not holding any grudges, they’ve both hurt each other and now neither of them want to actually fight so he does the mature thing and leaves it be. He tries to stop conflict before it happens though usually in vain. He keeps his family safe by just living his own life and not letting it be overtaken by the same paranoia that Leo feels.
I just love the big red blorbo, he deserves a hug and cookie for everything he’s been through. Also once again it may be a ReaderxDonatello fic but by gods I won’t stop finding other characters to simp over too.
Hypno may be married but by the looks of it Raph it good for the pickings sooo ima yoink the big red squishy toy.
Yyyyyoink
GOD I LOVE READING THESE!!!!! IT'S LIKE YOU HAVE DELIVERED ME A BIG OLD BOWL OF MY FAVORITE SOUP!!!!!! IM SLURPING IT UP!!!!
I think it's really interesting (I literally wrote it what am i talking about) if you think about how scared Donnie has left them physically and compare it to emotionally. Leo is arguably the least scared physically, but the most scarred emotionally. While Raph my appear to have the worst, it's actually Mikey that has the worst damage, but he's the one least connected to it! It's a comparison made intentional and literal considering his traumatic brain injury disconnected his ability to taste. To bring the croissant in from chapter 58, everything about what happened to them is layered, laminated, and interspersed! That's surely not even everything I've done, but I do adore metaphors and meanings so they are aplenty!
Raphy gets to really shine a few chapters down the line from now! I hope he'll continue to impress! He's not tied down as far as the story is concerned, I likened Raphala to having some kind of partner, but I wasn't going to write them! You are free to take anyone as you see fit, I won't tell 🤭
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I haven't posted in a hot while, gosh—
Ask box is open for requests but, now that I've remembered this blog exists, let's discuss:
Easy Ways To Uplevel Your Writing
Writing is hard, sometimes, and it's easy to start a paragraph and feel like it sounds off. However, there are tiny, simple tricks you can employ to make your writing sound a little bit better.
1 - Sentence Structure
I could do a whole separate post on sentence structure, because it really does matter a lot when kept in mind. Diversifying sentence structure can allow your writing to flow easier, seem less repetitive, and to give off a more educated impression.
For example:
'She told me outright that I wasn't making any sense, despite my attempts to explain. What we were being sold was a lie, and I knew it. It was just hard to articulate, especially when I was confronted by such an orthodox believer. The conversation was worthless, as I was unable to get through to her.'
It sounds dry and repetitive. You could, alternatively, change it to something like:
'She cornered me on the sidewalk, a twitch in her eye, telling me outright that I wasn't making any sense. I tried my best to explain my beliefs, but her concrete mindset made it difficult for me to get through to her. What we were being sold was a lie. Our confrontation, inevitably, was worthless.'
None of my examples are bestseller-worthy but we don't do effort on this blog, alright? You can probably see the difference.
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2 - Descriptions
This section is gonna be a two-bit ordeal. First, let's talk about placement.
Sometimes, it's simple to just say things are happening. It gets your point across, and sets the scene for anything happening after, therefore making it efficient. However, replacing kinds of 'blank' statement paragraphs with description can often do a much better job. It sets the scene with a lot more drama, builds a much more immerse setting, and can be used to develop plot-points and elements about your introduction a lot more than a 'blank' paragraph would.
Example 1:
'He closed the door to the garage. The door was shut, his keys jingling in his pocket. Steve sighed, a puff of condensed breath blowing from his mouth and disappearing into the night. It was another boring day where he would walk home through the cold streets of London and return again to work as soon as the sun cracked the barrier of dawn. But he was wrong to assume that the next night would be as peaceful as the one he would retire to. There was a monster in the garage, and it was waiting to break free.'
Turning to:
'He closed the door to the garage. The door was shut, his keys jingling in his pocket. Steve sighed, a puff of condensed breath blowing from his mouth and disappearing into the night. It was another boring day where he would walk home through the cold streets of London and repeat the day at the crack of dawn. But there was a sense of dread within him that itched at his brain. Regardless of his repairs, he'd return to the dusty garage with his woodwork and soldering scratched and scuffed. The way the shadows appeared to contort when he squinted—they formed hands, late at night, which strenuously attempted to reach for him. Steve had attributed it all to sleep deprivation and forgetfulness. The scattering he would hear when the moon would reach its peak said otherwise, the ever-distant skittering reminding him of crawing spiders. But his denial kept him coming back day after day.'
These are some long examples, jeez. But you guys get the point. The latter is a bit more engaging, thought-provoking, and less matter-of-fact.
The next thing is to do with how vivid your descriptions are. I recommend to add movement into your descriptions—have things change or move as you describe them. Involve your character, especially if you're talking from a first person POV. Utilise metaphors, similies, personification and phonetics to create a clearer and engaging image of what you are describing.
Example 2:
'Washing between the rock and the shore, the water came in waves. Dancing in an elegant sway, greeting the sand and retreating to the sea, as the tides pulled at the water. Matilda played with the shells at her feet. She searched for which stones shone the brightest under the sun, finding one that rippled in colour like the reflections in the ocean.'
Again, not the best description that could ever be written, but it displays most of the points I mentioned. Though I will not be elaborating on all descriptive techniques used, this is an ask blog. I'll make a separate post on any topic relating to writing or the English language if prompted (or if I get bored).
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3 - Play With Motifs and Themes
Having a set theme for what you're writing isn't essential, but setting out specific motifs, themes, and meanings within your writing can give it a very professional and intriguing edge.
Themes such as guilt can be shown through characters. Perhaps your main character is guilty about something, and that guilt fuels or prevents them from reaching their goals. That guilt ripples, infects others, and fuels the conflict in your story. Guilt becomes ever-present within the plot or subplots. This is just an example. Themes can be anything from death, mistrust, resurrection, or the main message you are trying to convey. A theme is a central topic, message, or idea that your work discusses within itself.
By identifying themes in your story, you can incorporate them into your writing subtly. It can create cohesiveness, and can show the clear understanding that the writer has of the purpose of their writing.
Motifs accompany or explain themes. They are reoccurring symbols, ideas, items, and imagery that relate to the core themes of your writing. Poems about love may include frequent imagery of flowers and natural settings. Stories that explore the inevitable—whether that be death, time travel, sickness, or something related to mental health—may have a time motif, where the descriptions of events and settings mention time, the current date, clocks, or the time of day.
Motifs are repeated, reoccurring ideas that tie in with your themes, characters, and plot. Taking into account themes and potential motifs throughout your work can uplevel your writing by infusing the key ideas of your writing in your characters and descriptions.
And it kind of makes you sound smarter, which in my opinion is a good chunk of the goal.
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In my view, the best way to get better at writing is to practice and to understand. Research techniques and grammar, and experiment with then. Get other people's opinions (preferably friends) and make sure to rant your heart out about your ideas to further solidify them and to boost your ego. Ego is good, but don't overdo it. I have some horrendous stories on those who overdo it.
And, most importantly, your readers can tell if you're having fun. So have fun, or else.
#letsdiscuss#ask blog#writing#creative writing#writing advice#writing prompt#send asks#fiction writing#fantasy writing#fanfiction#writeblr
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Do you think any of the Sinclairs (or Mikey) would like when you ride their thigh?
I think Vincent and Michael would both like it, but maybe you think all all of them would? Or have more to say about it?
I just have a vivid image of Vinny holding his partner's hips while they ride his thigh on the couch so maybe I'm just being overindulgent
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Omg they would all be a fan because it involves you without pants grinding on them because you’re that desperate to get yourself off on any part of them that you can. It’s a rush of power, a sight of pure sexiness. By all means, ride their thigh bare or clothed.
Vincent would love that you’re that needy for him, too impatient to wait for him to slip inside of you and scratch that ever-present itch that being in his presence causes. He’d grip your hips and add pressure to your movements, grinding your clit against his thigh until you’re leaving a wet trail all over his pants and you’re seeing stars. Bonus points if his brothers see you doing this.
Bo would be so smug over it, and he’d talk to you the entire time. “So needy, ain’t ya darlin’? Can’t even wait for me to get inside ya, huh? That’s okay darlin’, I got ya.” Like his twin, he’d also grip at your hips and add pressure and speed to your movements until his coveralls are soaked through.
Lester would be over the moon over it, especially if it’s in his truck with him. Sometimes you go to work with him to mix things up and get some different scenery. The fact that you don’t care that he and his clothes are filthy but you’re doing it anyways is such a head rush—he’s into this. Grind on him all you want while he presses kisses wherever he can reach. He also might reach down and play with your clit while you ride his thigh. He wants you to finish at least once before he’s fishing himself out of his pants and lowering you down onto him.
Michael would be smug and amazed, making searing eye contact with you in between feasting on the sight of your cunt snug against his thigh. He just got back from one of his “hunting” trips and he’s covered in blood, but you don’t care—you like to taste his adrenaline and rage. He’s not going to let you finish on his thigh though. He’ll wait until you’re close and then he’ll plow you with all his built up adrenaline and rage and his lust for you. To quote The Used, “this lust to my brain almost feels like a gun” and it rings true in your relationship with him. He always wants inside of you, where he feels true peace and a sense of home.
#payton’s asks#michael myers#💙anon#blue my beloved#bo sinclair#vincent sinclair#lester sinclair#thigh riding
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Patient Zero
A goretober post meant for last year's goretober using 3 OCs of mine.
TW // worms, mentions of surgery, gore, body horror.
● Ezekiel — It's been a few days since I've gotten my brain surgery. The doctors say it was a success and I'll make a full recovery. They didn't tell me about the side effects though.
Sometimes I'll hear a strange squirming sound, like someone chewing openly into a microphone. I've told my doctor and he says it's probably my brain hard at work to make up for whatever procedure they had done. He told me it would pass.
I believe him.
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It's been a few months now and the sounds have gone away. I'm at my happiest now, making a full recovery from the surgery and living my life to the fullest.
But recently the noises have come back. They've become louder than last time, now a constant sound in my ear. I try to hide how it affects my daily life but I can't help the disgust that crosses my face. It's causing me trouble at work, I'm trying my best to correct it.
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It's been a few weeks since they began again. I've lost my job, too many incidents and complaints from customers.
My few friends have dwindled to one after I've complained about the noises to them. They think I'm crazy and I can't say I blame them.
I haven't left the house in days; the noises are louder than ever and driving me up the wall.
I'm sure I've gotten texts and phone calls, but the sounds are muffled in comparison to the wet, squirming noises in my head.
It's gotten to the point where I've taken to scratching at my ear, using whatever I can to reach deeper and deeper into my ears. My fingers, forks, knives. The best working so far has been the steel rat tail comb I own. It always comes out bloody but the noises have lessened.
But so has my hearing.
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I didn't hear the worm when the first one fell, but I felt it.
It was two in the morning. Another sleepless night from the noises.
I had been laying on my side when there was a wet squelch from my ear and it felt as though something had slipped out. A shudder of disgust ran through me and it shifted to horror when I sat up to see what it had been.
A worm the length of my middle finger rested where my ear had been, squirming in a puddle of my blood.
Bile crawled up my throat but was swallowed down to clean up the mess.
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The next worm to be found was another feeling.
There was a strange itch in my eye. I thought it was simply an eyelash but when looking in the mirror, I saw the writhing of something beneath my eyelid.
Tugging the skin down only confirmed the feeling of dread steadily growing like a pit in my chest. I took to my eye with tweezers, noticing the end sticking out just below my line of vision.
Familiar bile made my mouth fill with spit as I snagged onto the wriggling end of the worm. It was a struggle to pull out, pain blooming in both eye and flesh as the worm seemed to squirm and try to dig in deeper. With a quiet grunt, the worm was pulled free by a wet pop and drawn blood.
This time, I was unable to hold back the vomit as I washed the worm down the drain.
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For a time, the noises stopped. I assumed it was finally gone by the worms that I had been almost religiously removing from my body.
My hearing was shot and my vision going but I allowed myself that sense of peace, paranoia ebbing away little by little until I was almost positive the situation was done and over.
Days passed and my unease was gone completely, but I still had yet to return to the outside world. I had an affinity to the dark now, and often stayed in the bath with the lights off.
I don't know when or why it began, but it seemed to satisfy something deep within me. But that's when the whispers began.
They tormented me for days, but they weren't as bad as the noises. They were tolerable.
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I woke up in a sweat, choking on any cries I made from the pain coursing through me. It was full body and it felt as though something was crawling beneath my skin as if I were a beehive.
The voices were louder, too loud. They drowned out any noises that could have been heard.
Someone was screaming. It was distant.
Bile filled my throat before I was vomiting, finding myself hunched over the toilet.
When did I get here?
The sight of it only made me vomit again.
Writhing in the mass of blood and stomach acid were worms, too many to be less than a hundred.
In the bathroom light, the pain only worsened to the point I was nearly numb, but the sight of my skin was enough for me to empty my stomach into the steadily overflowing toilet again.
Beneath my flesh were worms. Hundreds, thousands, maybe even millions. All writhing and rolling over one another as if I was rich dirt ripe with nutrients.
The screaming grew louder, penetrating what little hearing I had left and seemingly sending the worms into a frenzy.
It hurt.
It hurt. It hurt. It hurt. Ithurt. Ithurtithurtithurtithurtithurtithurtithurt.
Pain tore at my skin, blooming in liquid red and purple. Nails clawed and clawed, trying to tear the parasites from beneath my flesh as if it would help.
Somehow I made it to my living room. More screaming. More tearing. More pain.
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● Enzo — It had been days since I had last seen Ezekiel.
They hadn't shown up for any of the events nor returned any of my calls or texts and I was starting to grow worried. Especially after their numerous complaints of hearing noises.
Our friends slowly abandoned him but Enkai and I stayed, attempting to ease their mind when we could.
I was removed from my thoughts by walking into his apartment door, grunting at the pain in my nose before I was knocking, calling for my friend.
There was no response, but their location showed they were home. A pit of dread filled my stomach as I tried to think up possible reasons for the lack of response.
My hand brushed at the extra key in my pocket that Ezekiel had given to Enkai and I after a bad decline in their health. I made no hesitation to open the door, flinching a little at the smell that seemed to leave it.
I retched, free hand covering my mouth as if to stop the penetrating smell of death and rotting flesh as I shut the door behind me.
“Ezekiel? Are you here?”
There was no response.
“You haven't responded to any of my texts or calls for a while, I was starting to worry.”
The stench seemed to get worse as I traveled further, and there was a strange wet, squelching sound from somewhere further into the room.
I hadn't thought to turn on the light when I stepped into the living room, but now my hand blindly reached and flailed to hit the light switch.
A hiss met me when the light flooded the room and the sight soon enough had me hunched over, vomiting onto the ruined floor.
Ezekiel, my friend, stood—no, floated—above the floor, held in place by a thick substance similar to gum that spread out behind them like butterfly wings, attached to the walls and ceiling. They were spread in fashion similar to being pinned to the cross.
A fleshy mound was attached to their back in fashion similar to a cocoon. Flesh was rotting, some of it torn and the bone stripped bare and I could see the tendons and veins hanging limply from holes torn into their skin. A whole leg was missing. Holes littered Ezekiel's stomach and I could see through it to the other side, surrounded by peeling back flesh and organs spilling onto the floor.
But that hadn't been the worst part.
Ezekiel was staring at me. Where their flesh wasn't being ravaged by decay, worms crawled in and out like maggots, falling to the ground in piles upon piles that nearly covered the entirety of the floor. Half of their face was stripped, revealing the skull beneath, but the top of their head was completely gone, exposing their brain crawling with the creatures tearing them apart.
But they were still alive. They were still alive and they were staring.
A mass of blood and worms fell from their mouth as it opened, and what was left of their voice box let out a scratchy groan.
“Turn off the lights. They like the dark.”
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I tried the A3! Ship chart except my brain is always on overdrive so I don't know what's going on. Everything here is under aspec lens so nothing is romantic unless stated otherwise.
Detailed explanation under the cut.
This basically means that they have a label on their relationship but they're alterous. I think BanTsumu are boyfriends and possibly married in the future. To be honest, I don't really care what their labels is but I think they're the type to put a name on their relationship.
Established:
BanTsumu is my ultimate OTP, I just like the peaceful vibes they give. Tsumugi becomes a lot more playful when he's around Banri and Banri is uncharacteristically always tied around Tsumu's little finger. They're polar opposites but they find comfort in each other like how Banri helped calm Tsumugi down with a cup of coffee when he was nervous and how Tsumugi makes Banri feel safe enough to release his worries. As an aspec mf their dynamic feeds my soul!
Romantic:
1. SakyoIzu: they're not really my top choice but if I'm gonna ship them, I think they would be romantic.
2. TaiYuki: Taichi definitely has the fattest crush on Yuki and I think once he realizes it, he's gonna want something more out of it.
3. TsumuHaru: Tsumugi and Haruto just scratch an itch in my head😔 I think they're the type of couple who tease each other endlessly, act like they're done with each other's antics, and they constantly bicker but at the end of the day, they understand each other most.
OTP:
1. ChikaIzu: MY ALTEROUS BELLS 🫶 RING SO HARD FOR THESE TWO. They are family and they would do anything for each other. They're not shy to reach out when the other needs help, they make promises with each other, they have a playful dynamic, they bond with each other even in the most mundane settings... MY BRAIN JUST HURTS WHEN I THINK OF THEM because I want what they have!!!
2. AzuTasu: Tasuku is just so down bad for Azuma, man. LIKE WHAT EVEN IS THE ENTIRETY OF NOCTURNALITY? Not only that, Tasuku is DENSE but for some reason, he's always one step ahead of comforting Azuma. Also, why does he call everyone by their last name EXCEPT AZUMA 😭 LIKE WHAT THE HELL? Don't even get me started with Azuma's semi playful flirting and Tasuku just responds in the most sincere way THEN AZU GETS ALL FLUSTERED? Whenever these two interact, I just want someone to punch me.
3. HisoIta: I saw this ship one day, thought about it for 10 minutes, and hopped in the ship. I love the idea of spoiler x spoiled. Itaru is SO good at spoiling people and Hisoka is like a cat that needs to be spoiled rotten. Hisoka is also the type of person who will let you do your thing but he'll try to help you in his own terms when he feels like you need help. I like that cause I think Itaru likes his own space and pace so Hisoka is perfect for that!!
4. ME AND KASUMI : look, I know her wife died and I'm sorry but like... If the triplets need a stepmom just hook me up.
Like:
1. JuTen: I just love the mutual respect they have for each other 🛐
2. HisoSaku: TWO ANGELS TOGETHER IS NEVER THE WRONG MOVE!!! Hisoka has this vibe that he's always carrying something heavy and I think whenever he's around Sakuya, he relaxes and he likes watching over how pure Sakuya is about everything. I think if Sakuya asks Hisoka for a favor, he would skip his sleep just to fulfill it.
3. BanSaku: THESE TWO JUST.... *SQUISH* I have no words except AHHHHHHH KEEP LOOKING OUT FOR EACH OTHER!!!
4. TenSaku: Tenma's crush on Sakuya in Act 1 never died on me. Sakuya's acting was acknowledged to not be the best at that time but he just saw how pure and passionate Sakuya is for acting so he felt inspired. HE TALKED TO HIM TO RESPECTFULLY TOO LIKE 🙉🙉 Y'all make me crazy.
5. CitoTsuzu: Citron please keep looking after our playwright boy. He may complain all the time but he looks up to you so much and I know you adore him for all he is.
Poly:
1. Fuyupoly: Fuyu is so unserious 💀 I know they're supposed to be the mature group but I swear I was never fully sold on that idea. I think they'd all live together with their shenanigans until they die.
2. CitoIzuChika: This is kinda complicated but like Citron and Izumi are bros, super tight bros, they always go out together and hang out— everyone is convinced they are together. Chikage and Izumi are the same but their dynamic is more serious than the crackhead energy CitoIzu gives. At one point, they just started going on dates together and now they have this giant queerplatonic poly/polybromantic thing going on.
I do not know how my brain cooked this up so please don't ask.
BroTP:
1. MukuYuki: MY BABIES 🫶 I want them to be there for each other forever
2. KumoAzuShift: The Bois hanging out.
3. TaiAza: the bois hanging out 2. Azami better be Taichi's wingman for Yuki!
4. BanIta: I think this is very common but it's mostly because of their gaming ventures.
5. BanTen: Their interests line up really well and I just love watching them talk tbh
6. ChikaIta: Please roast each other even more 🤗 also, Chikage is Hisoka's brother but Hisoka is with Itaru. I like them getting along but also I like Chikage being like "what the fuck" everytime he sees a new side of Hisoka when he's with Itaru. Maybe we can have either side ranting to Chikage about their relationship problems and Chikage is like "just fucking talk to each other my god".
7. MasuSaku: THE OG LEADS
8. MasuTange: Tangerine is so cute and I love love love him with Masumi. Masumi is so >:( while Tangerine is a ball of sunshine!! I need more interactions with the two of these!! LIKE AT LEAST SHOW US THEM CALLING EACH OTHER 😭
9. CitoIzu: MY ULTIMATE BRO OF ALL BROTPs! 🛐 These two will probably do anything together and I mean anything. I'm convinced they'd get married while skydiving just to prove a point they're making. They are besties who enable each other's bad ideas 😍 and I love it. My favorite genre is dumbasses being dumbasses.
NOTP:
1. JuBan : I don't hate JuBan but I have bad experiences with JuBan fans that kinda ruined the ship for me :( I'm sorry it's not them, it's the fans that terrorize my BanTsumu posts in the past.
Parent:
1-4. Kumon and Muku w Guy and Tsumugi: I just want the winter adults to look after my chaotic chuunibyou son and his cute but equally chaotic cousin. Guy looking after anyone in general is adorable to be honest and I like Tsumugi's teacher side.
#a3#a3! act addict actors#a3!#a3! game#act addict actors#a3! ships#i talk a lot#honestly if you give me ANY rarepair theres a 80% chance ill agree w u#brainspilling so i dont carry these in my exams
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Hey, I recently had a brief manic episode where I read through all your Renji fics, and I need you to know that I really loved your writing, and it helped me ride out my unfortunate mental health fluctuation in a way that scratched my itch to become a feral fucking goblin without actually doing anything destructive. Rottweiler altered my DNA probably. Peace and love on planet earth, thank you for your service and your talent 🫡
WOW!! First of all I'm glad you're feeling better, and I definitely get what you mean LMAO, Renji is such a great muse for high-intensity emotional journeys because I feel like that's just his daily existence. He IS the feral mental health goblin who lives in my brain...
MAN I love Rottweiler and I'm STILL kinda surprised that other people vibed with it, too. I'm really fucking happy about it, though! I'm glad we can all agree that Renji needs a strong, grizzled househusband to take care of him.
Thanks so much for sending this message, I've read it over and over a couple times and I'll probably re-read it a lot more because it makes me really happy <333
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i forgor (😭💀) to get back to you on your good omens fic it was so cute actually :] like i really like how you wrote their date not as some kind of revelation but it's just kinda natural. like it was bound to happen it was inevitable kinda schtuff so it was less a sort of dramatic spectacle of love but more so a confirmation of what was always there and the point about celestial beings going beyond what they were made for and loving each other in a very human way that was good. ore you about to make me watch good omens 🤨. it was really nice and tender and thank god for gay love and those who write it <33
wwaahhh juno you understand it so well <33 i wanted so badly to write about a peaceful kind of love because for them i feel like they've spent so much of their relationship debating & denying their feelings and wondering "is this right? is this the way we're supposed to do things?" that i feel like once they really acknowledged their love, it wouldn't be some grand spectacle . it would kinda just be a sigh of relief? i loooooove the drama & the turmoil & the aching i love it don't get me wrong but they deserve so much more than that. also i felt it was so important to make their whole relationship just. natural and free . like they'll have all the time in the world to be extravagant and dramatic and fun and wild but it scratched this itch in my brain to write their love confession as just a simple (& meaningful) exchange of words. as obsessed as i am with the unrequited pining and pain and love that hurts and everything, i am equally obsessed with the kind of love that comes so naturally and normally that it feels like breathing.
#hazrdouswaste#SORRY FOR THE SLIGHT RAMBLE#i'm also so fuckig . SOOOO FUCKING OBSESSED WITH THE SYMBOLISM BETWEEN OF LOVE/ATTRACTION AND MAGNETS. ROMANCE AND MAGNETISM. AUGH#anyway . thank you so so so much for sharing your thoughts with me i am kissing you foreverr<333 love you
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I was tagged by @goosemixtapes to post my nine favorite albums! Some of ours are the same but that’s just bc we both have great taste I guess
In no particular order:
Cures What Ails Ya, The Longest Johns: Me when the seas are shantying. This album goes so hard and contains such a variety of vibes while preserving the slappage of all of them. 10/10 would go a-fishing for the whale again
Ceremonials, Florence + The Machine: GOD it was so hard to pick one of hers. I almost put Dance Fever here but I feel like it’s too early to say that yet. I think this album has the highest concentration of my favorite songs of hers so <3
Go Farther In Lightness, Gang of Youths: Okay okay this is my favorite album of all time. It’s not even about the music (though that does go incredibly hard) it’s the way the lyrics so consistently make me feel like I’ve been punched in the gut /pos. I limited myself to one album per artist but major shoutout to Let Me Be Clear also
Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812: Literally would not be the person I am today if it were not for my intense obsession with this show, and subsequently War and Peace, for two solid years. Thanks to this album for a major part of my personality.
Strange Trails, Lord Huron: The woods <3 Literally so true besties. I don’t have much clever and intelligent to say about this album except that it goes so so so hard
Ruin, The Amazing Devil: Shoutout to Rook for introducing me to this one. Every song on this album is incredible and I have no idea how they manage to consistently put out the best music on planet Earth.
Wild World, Bastille: I can’t even explain to you what I like so much about Bastille’s music but it scratches an itch in my brain. It’s also vaguely nostalgic, because Bastille was the first artist I decided to listen through their discography. Good decision past me.
Eurus, The Oh Hellos: EVERY SONG IS SO GOOD. Every one no exceptions. I really love the general sound of The Oh Hellos, and this album has a concentration of my favorite things about their style. Also it has one of my favorite album covers ever. The Eurus/Notos/Boreas/Zephyrus art is gorgeous.
Wasteland, Baby!, Hozier: Hozier my BELOVED. This album has such a good vibe to it and I really adore the style of music. I could listen to Hozier forever I think
I’m tagging @narratorstragedy @plague-on-both-your-houses @sofyarostova @silvercatarts if yall want to do it :) or if you want to do it and I didn’t tag you (sorry im tired rn) consider yourself tagged
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i 'ship' sean x cale based solely on what you have posted about them and really only because when i do not know a great deal about them. i don't need to worry about it being an ic ship, i just get to enjoy the toxicity of it all. 'ship'? no. enjoy thinking about them with some gravitational something with and through each other? more than i enjoy the thought of sean & the other people in the poll
Yesss, yes, yes, you get it! Same!
Shipping, imo, purely by virtue of it literally deriving from relationship, does not always have to be romantic. Because... nah, that would not work. Sean would die before feeling anything but hatred for Cale LOL. Sometimes shipping can literally just be "I would like to smash these two characters together in whatever way I can because I think they have a fascinating dynamic and there is something tasty there to be explored".
But.
I do think that it's possible Cale could feel something for Sean. Love? Mmeh. Maybe? I personally like the idea of it being an obsession more than anything, something that isn't love, but as close to love as Cale can get.
This mostly comes from the fact that there are a lot of parallels between Sean and the horse trainer that Cale had a crush on as a child (and who became his first human victim). The whole reason Cale kills is because he's reenacting his first murder and trying to reframe it. Over and over and over again. But none of them seem to satisfy or intrigue Cale like Sean does, and in the finale, I don't believe that it's Katie who mirrors the first victim, it's Sean.
Through the film, Cale treats Katie like an animal. Likely imagining the young horse that he killed as a boy. The only time he doesn't is when he dresses her as the horse trainer when preparing to kill her, which is probably something he does ritualistically to all his victims who he successfully breaks. But Sean? He calls him by name and treats him like an equal worthy of conversation. He even literally praises Sean and says he's "worthy of playing in [his] sandbox". But most damning, I think, is that he makes Sean watch as he kills Katie, just like he made the trainer watch as he killed the horse. It's almost exactly the same scene.
There's also something to be said about Cale dying and perming his hair to look similar to Sean's at the end. What precisely, I don't know. But considering how obsessive he had become over his first victim, it makes me raise a brow.
Soooo I think Cale could develop an obsession if not an infatuation for Sean in the most twisted sense. Not because he actually loves Sean or genuinely finds him attractive, but because he impresses him, and the lines between Sean and his first victim have blurred so strongly that Cale can't always tell the difference. Maybe someone like Sean is what he needed all along to finally bring him peace from his first murder; he'd been killing symbolic "horses" for years, and now it's time he went after the symbolic "trainer".
As for Sean... well, obviously the feeling would not be mutual. But after everything that happened, I don't think he'd be able to escape thoughts of Cale. He'd be in the corner of his eye, in nightmares, in passing stranger's faces. And in that terrible way, I think Sean and Cale are inseparable. Whether they like it or not, they have become huge, inescapable parts of each other's lives, irreparably changed.
It just feels very classic hero/villain to me in a "[this version of] you would not exist without me" kinda way, and it scratches some angsty, whumpy itch in my brain that I really enjoy.
#i hope this makes sense anon. bad samaritan makes my thoughts whir like an overheating computer fan.#so i don't always know how to translate my brain's keysmashing into something coherent hahaha#anonymous#merri answers#bad samaritan#cale erendreich#sean x cale#?? not sure if i should tag this as meta or not but#meta#meta: bad samaritan#meta: cale erendreich
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