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lastweeksshirttonight · 9 months

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All righty, I managed to get back home despite the hurricane, let's talk about the show.

Tl;dr - I traveled cross-country to see John Oliver and Seth Meyers. It was amazing and I am still giddy about it!! Gonna put all the details under a cut to not clog up your timeline/the tags.

(All jokes will be paraphrased/guestimated bc my adrenaline and ADHD played havoc with my memory recall, lol.)

Firstly, the Beacon Theatre is absolutely stunning. It reminds me a bit of the Theatre at Ace Hotel in LA, in that it's clearly had its old elements lovingly preserved and harkens back to an older time. It was truly a gorgeous venue.

I missed getting a pic of the other side of the stage, which had a massive sculpture of shields and spears. John made a joke about the opulence of the room not matching the entertainment for the evening, and noted that "even Coco Chanel would say to keep it to one shield". Really wish I'd thought to get a picture of it, he was not wrong.

I was extremely close to the stage - 3 rows back and dead center. I definitely had the anxious excited adrenaline jitters because of it.

I mean COME ON.

The opener was Brooks Wheelan, who I remembered from his brief stint at SNL. He talked a fair deal about that, and told a great story bit about getting fired from there and opening for John shortly after, wherein he drank an entire bottle of "HBO blood diamond whiskey" from John's dressing room and had, in Seth's later words, "a nervous breakdown". I'd heard Brooks has opened for John before and was glad I got to see him, he's a lot of fun.

He also told a joke about not wanting to learn karate because of the huge glass windows in front of every karate studio and not wanting anyone to watch him learn karate. Lots of very understanding laughter there, including from me. (Why do all these places have massive plate glass windows?!)

After Brooks was John Oliver, and y'all. Let me get this out of the way.

He is fine as hell. Look. Just LOOK. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO DEAL WITH THIS

I would also like to take the time to gush effusively about John's mastery of set structure. The set was, aside from the typical "before we get started, I need to let you know I'm British" pseudo-opener he's used since like 2005, entirely new material -

(As an aside... !!!!!! I KNOW!!!! A FULL FUCKING HOUR OF ENTIRELY NEW MATERIAL!! THAT I WAS NEAR THE FRONT FOR!!!! I'M SO VERKLEMPT STILL YOU HAVE NO IDEA)

- and it was just beautifully written from a structural standpoint. It was pretty much all political material all centered around history and the need to understand it for context on the world as it currently stands. There were some digressions from that point but they were seamlessly woven in. He is such a goodamn incredible stand-up comedian.

A few things he talked about in his set:

That time the US dropped nukes on itself twice (which was briefly mentioned on LWT but not in this detail and not including a reenactment of a man dropping a bomb while working on a plane and him reacting to watching it roll away).

That the current British royal line of succession exists because of a "cousin-fucker who cut someone into pieces like a Benihana chef". (John told us this is something he learned researching this bit, which caused me unending joy. I love that he's making new sets!! :D)

John delights in the misery of billionaires and wished that the rocket Jeff Bezos was on would blow up. He doesn't want him to die, though. Through this he also talked about Elon Musk and his favorite fake blue check company tweets, mainly a series made by a fake Chiquita account claiming to have overthrown Brazil, followed by Chiquita saying they hadn't actually overthrown any governments since 1954.

John got booed at a Sesame Street benefit and told a killer set of jokes about Bert judging him for it. ("The man lives with Ernie! He knows chaos!")

He claims we will all know things are okay with the US again when we are all irrationally mad at Anne Hathaway for no reason again. Told an incredible story about how he just blundered into the street in LA once, almost got hit by a car, looked up, realized it was Anne Hathaway in the car, saw her wave at him, and, despite the scenario being objectively his fault, being somehow mad at her.

Shaded Dave Chappelle in an analogy about how we are not at Civil War division times because "somehow our level of division is people debating whether Chapelle's SNL monologue was okay or not", in a way that suggested it was very much not okay. 10/10 no notes.

Okay so there was one recycled bit - him being informed the Queen wanted to give him an OBE. He added to it fantastically though, by personifying the man from the embassy as the most offensively British stereotype you could possibly imagine. He said the man sounded like "if a British person rubbed a teapot and a genie came out".

There was definitely more but I could gush forever so let's move on.

Brooks came back out to introduce Seth and forgot the name of his show, lol. For a brief moment we all contemplated what Last Week Tonight with Seth Meyers would look like. (I assume the show's Adam Driver would be Stefon.)

Anyways, here is the only good photo I took of Seth.

Seth was great as well - not as good as John, but I'm very biased in that regard. The material was also pretty diametrically opposed to John's, much more domestic comedy about his wife and kids and their idiosyncracies.

I really liked Seth's energy and approach. I don't quite know how to explain this, but he had a touch of Dennis Reynolds energy to him, a restrained manicness, that was really interesting to watch. That's not my normal association with Seth's energy, either, but it was very fun. Definitely puts some of the more deranged things from his tenure as Weekend Update host in context.

Some highlights from Seth's set:

He had an amazing brick joke about doing accents as a comedian, where he imitated a Swedish accent and talked about how everyone's Swedish accent is basically the Swedish Chef from the Muppets and how the only Swedish food anyone has nearby is the meatballs at IKEA. Funny on its own, but later in the show, Seth talked about how people assume he's fully Jewish, including people on the street. He noted that he's 25% Swedish but no one comes up to him on the street and goes -insert Swedish Chef impression-. (This straight up killed the guy sitting next to me, who ended up laughing with his head in his hands for a solid 30 seconds.)

His kids eat very healthily, so when they end up going to friends' houses and eat one Skittle, they turn into demons. Literal demons. Seth's impression of an actual demon trying to undo a double-buckled car seat was the hardest I laughed at his whole set.

Seth also had a section which he claimed would be the part where he'd tell anti-trans jokes "if he was a complete asshole". I enjoyed the trans affirmation the whole evening, ngl.

Seth's family and his wife's family have very different ways of conversing at the dinner table, which directly mirrors my and my partner's family - Seth's family (like Mr. Lee's) is big on listening to everyone and contributing to conversations only when someone else has talked; Alexi's family (like mine) is constantly screaming over each other.

After Seth's set, everyone (including Brooks) came out to do a Q&A. I could not think of a song in the moment, but realized at the hotel room an hour after that I should have made @chiijohn 's evening by asking John's opinion on Planet of the Bass. :facepalm: Sorry mate!

Still, some great questions were asked, and it was about 30 minutes of just audience interaction. I've never experienced anything like it at a stand-up gig and genuinely loved it. John, of course, told people they were free to leave before the Q&A because why would they want to stay; the man is incapable of thinking anything good about himself and much as I hate his bad self-esteem, I would have been concerned if he hadn't said something to that effect.

Brooks was asked almost immediately if he remembered the name of Seth's show, which was honestly hilarious. Brooks said "I conferred with John backstage and we're both pretty sure that it's Late Night with Seth Meyers".

Someone asked how fearful Seth and John were of their shows being cancelled after one year, and Brooks snarked that he knew that feeling. (Brooks seems to have a good sense of humour about not being a huge presence on SNL.) Seth said that he wasn't super worried but that they redid his entire set (background set, not stand-up set) because Alec Baldwin said it looked like "a sushi restaurant in Burbank". (theoniontheworstpersonyouknow.jpg) John said he was told most HBO shows don't get cancelled at one season and he said "we'll see about that".

There was definitely some extended riffing on Alec Baldwin being a piece of shit afterwards, while John giggled helplessly. I love John's giggling.

Seth and John's favorite Muppet is Cookie Monster. They talked about how interesting it is that you can have amazing chemistry with Muppets, and then meet the puppeteer and have literally nothing to talk about. Seth also talked about how low-tech Big Bird was, and how the late Carroll Spinney, when on SNL, held a script in one hand, the controls of Big Bird in the other, and a flashlight in his mouth to read the script.

Everyone is upset they didn't get to cover the indictments because of the Writer's Strike. John thought there were only 3, but I honestly don't know if one of them came down before the Writer's Strike and he was just referring to the ones since then. It's been a long few months for us all.

Brooks basically forces John and Seth to get out of their hotel rooms when touring. Otherwise, Seth said, "they both just sit there anxious". That tracks, especially for John, who literally said on Seth's podcast that he is physically incapable of relaxing.

When asked about their influences, John said (rather obviously) that he wouldn't have a career without Jon Stewart, and Brooks talked about how both Seth and John really uplifted him and cared for him after he got fired from SNL. Seth talked in a really lovely way about how Amy Poehler basically adopted him and got him out of his shell and was a real friend to him early on.

I really wish I'd written down every stand-up that the three of them recommended when prompted, because I've completely blanked on half of them. Seth said Joe Pera (who I also highly recommend); John recommended Maria Bamford (again, also highly recommend). He also said that most people in the room would have probably not heard of him but that the best in the UK was Daniel Kitson (paging @tellthemeerkatsitsfine to provide her recs bc she knows Kitson backwards and fronts). Brooks gave a shout to Kyle Kinane (who I am not as familiar with as I should be).

There was so much more, but honestly, I was just so in the moment that I feel like I remember things in waves. It was an amazing evening and I was honestly so blessed to be there at all.

I did not wait at the stage door or anything, because I am truly not that kind of person and have consistently been sure that if I ever met John, I'd barf on his shoes. I know on Instagram some people had gotten stage door photos, though, and I'm happy for them!

Thank you all for always being supportive of this dumb blog. I don't think I would have had the confidence to go on this cross-country journey without you all randomly egging me on all the time. It was one of the best nights of my life. 💖💖

#john oliver #seth meyers #brooks wheelan #last week tonight #last week tonight with john oliver #late night with seth meyers #stand up #lee's stream of consciousness

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leejeann · 9 months

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Isaac speaking like three words at a time and just in a book 90% of the time, but then in Paris it pans over to him paired with Harry and he’s just going off on him is SO funny. Get his ass lmao

#heartstopper #heartstopper spoilers #heartstopper season 2 #again I apologize to anyone following me who don't care about Heartstopper lol #I'm tagged all the posts as such so if you block the tag it'll save you from my current stream of consciousness #lee speaks

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littlespidermonkey · 4 months

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I think in the universe where the Cullens aren't in Forks, Bella Swan takes a while to come out of her shell, but when she does, she's witty and passionate and smart as a whip, even if she's still quiet and reserved. She sits with Jessica Stanley, who demands the best of everyone, and tells her friends about her boyfriend down on the rez, who is sweet and caring and funny and good with his hands, who works for everything he's ever had.

After class, during a sleepover, Bella whispers to tell Angie and Jess about the night after prom, even though her father, loving and careless, worries about her only a normal amount and loves Jacob Black like his own. When she gets into Dartmouth--all by herself, through study sessions in garages and with Jessica and in Angela's house--she chooses to go to Stanford instead. She misses the heat and light on her skin, even after falling in love with the rain. Jessica comes with her; Angela and Eric go to U of Washington in Seattle instead, for education and journalism respectively.

Bella makes sure to call every week and then one day she drives down to Seattle and her boyfriend, warm like the sun she loves and at least twice as reliable, becomes her fiancé. The ring isn't especially big or ornate or pricey, but the way she smiles could trick anyone into thinking that it was. All of her friends, new and old, are waiting at the small party afterwards, and Bella laughs the entire time. The engagement cake--chocolate, her favourite--is sweet and moist against her tongue.

She moves back to Forks once she gets her masters in information sciences and becomes the town's librarian. She gets married a month before the move, barefoot in the surf and her old prom dress, both her parents weeping with joy and Billy Black beaming damn near as bright as his son, Sue Clearwater holding his hand.

She raises her kids --both beautiful children, blessed with Jake's thick, long hair--with Angela and Eric's and takes them down to Los Angeles to visit their auntie Jess and her husband Quil, who lavishes them with gifts from her career as a top surgeon. She jokes about having to support Quil's career as an environmental lawyer and displays each and every one of his wins alongside her diplomas. When William Black II decides he wants to be a doctor too, she writes him a shining letter of recommendation to her alma mater. Sarah, who has always been the spitting image of her father, joins and eventually takes over Jacob's mechanic shop.

On occasion, Bella fights with Jacob, even though he's the love of her life. Despite this, she is never afraid of him, and he never stops her from doing what she wants. Instead, he goes out and works on his cars and comes back in an hour later with slightly greasy hands and a bouquet of flowers from Emily Young's little garden, planted to celebrate her cousin Leah Uley's wedding. Bella makes him muffins, recipe courtesy of Sue and missing bites courtesy of Seth, Colin, Sarah, Will, and Claire, with raspberries, not blueberries, just how Jake likes them. They make up, and they make changes, and they go on.

Eventually, both slower and quicker than she realizes, Bella gets old. She lives in fear of losing herself, of losing her husband and her children, like her grandmother had. But she remembers her grandkids to the very end, even gets to meet her first great-grandchild a week before it happens. Her heart gives out before her brain does, too weak and too slow.

It was too full of love, the letter from Jacob says. Sarah reads it. Her father passed a day after his wife--simply too heartbroken to live without her. Much of the town of Forks and hordes of family attend their funeral, remembering a life well lived.

It is an unremarkable life, in the grand scheme of things. She does not live to be a thousand; she is no great beast, with speed like the wind and strength; she does not discover her powers or lead a great defiance. Bella Black, happy and human and surrounded by love, could never imagine wanting anything else.

#lee's wild scribbles #team jacob #twilight saga #jacob x bella #swanblack #tw: food #OK! that's all the tags for searching so now it's time for the really important tags: me rambling #this was extremely stream of consciousness pls be nice #it was also supposed to come with a lil video like my other little ficlet for this fandom but tumblr wasn't feeling it #also i have not edited this and i'm not going to so if you see a typo you keep that shit to yourself #this was written kind of as a reflection on how bella lowkey chooses to sacrifice so much of what makes life good to me in favour of edward #and how she like. gives up her personhood and future to be his and has no friends outside of the cullens and jake #(who is essentially being held hostage by reenactment)#twilight has such a weird relationship with f3minism. i should write about that at some point #(also this is not tikt0k. i censor words so that they don't turn up in tags bc i doubt ppl in the f3minism tag are looking for twilight fic

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azure-firecracker · 3 months

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ATLA Live Action Stream of Consciousness (Episode 3, Part 1).

This rebel leader sounds like somebody but I don’t know who.

This very small plot twist has been ruined for me because I know what Lizzy Yu looks like.

Daniel Dae Kim as Ozai is awesome! He has a menacing presence that’s much more refined than just “RAAAAAH POWER!” One of the few things I think may have improved from the cartoon. And also what does he know about loss? Could be interesting.

AZULA I WAS ON THE FREAKING FLOOR SCREAMING I absolutely loved this intro. They’ve given her more emotional depth in this short clip than she got in like…all of book 2. And DAMN Lizzy Yu can act! She went through so many emotions so fast and barely said anything. The trolls who are criticizing her for not looking like a cartoon are not welcome on this blog. I hope the actual emotional depth keeps up.

Aang needs to stop teaching Katara waterbending let the girl be good at something.

“I never listened” FINALLY THIS KID GETS TO BE FUNNY

Gordon Cormier is adorable.

Dallas Liu continues to embody Zuko.

Zhao you devious asshole I’m glad he continues to suck. He does not need redeemable qualities.

Paul Sun-Hyung Lee’s lovingly disapproving looks are everything to me.

Omashu looks great!

Istg Katara may crush on this guy but OG Katara would never be this bashful. But who was he? He was hot!

CABBAGE MERCHANT

Wow Teo looks YOUNG!

Teo being desensitized to violence hits hard. I hope that kids being desensitized to violence becomes a theme (it happened in Azula’s scene too).

Gordon continues to do as well as he can with clunky dialogue.

Extended stay in Omashu could be an interesting change.

Sassy Azula we love!

I have already seen this clip so no surprises but I’ll share my thoughts anyway.

I knew this from interviews but Momona Tamada IS Ty Lee. She’s absolutely perfect.

I continue to love Lizzy Yu. She’s striking a balance of snarky but also clever and also you know she could kill you. I like that we get to see her be a little less guarded around her friends, and her feelings around Zuko/the throne make sense. Not sure if they’re going to make her all power motivated (wouldn’t love that) but regardless feeling like your work means nothing to those whose opinions you value is something I can definitely relate to, and it works for her character. Also her line about knowing which pieces to play? Chills!

More coming soon!

#atla #atla live action #netflix atla #avatar the last airbender #natla #atla stream of consciousness #ozai #azula #katara #aang #zuko #iroh #teo #ty lee

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championoflosers · 8 months

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Got some god tier shots the other morning

#miss kibby #lee speaks #honey #araña #anya #kitty #cat #my cat #silly cat #baby #cute cat #cute kitty #im not even tagging this like this so ppl will see it this is just my stream of consciousness looking at her #stinky baby #my awful little lady #scrungly

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mushiewrites · 2 years

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Whiskers and Eyeliner

Day 2 is for a request from @kasey-writes-stuff for lee!Dream and ler!Karl! Prompt from this post for the Tickletober event!

Day 2: Drawn On

(lee!Dream / ler!Karl : 1.8k words)

It was just an eyeliner pencil; something Sapnap had picked up at the halloween store when trying to find their ridiculous costumes. It was gel, specifically made for the purpose of being used as costume makeup, both so it wasn’t too harsh on the skin and so you didn’t have to press down as hard as a regular eyeliner to see results.

Dream let out a frustrated sigh when he flinched again, groaning and closing his eyes in annoyance. He looked at himself in his bathroom mirror, then turned his attention to the small pencil in his hand, spinning it between his two fingers as he contemplated whether he should continue or not. He knew he had to, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. When Sapnap and George had brought up the idea that he should be Patches for halloween, Dream immediately agreed, knowing it would be a minimal effort costume with maximum rewards, getting to see all the fanart of it for weeks to come. He set the eyeliner onto the marbled countertop of the sink, looking into the mirror and adjusting the brown ears that sat amongst his dirty blonde waves before glancing down again at the eyeliner.

It was just an eyeliner pencil. So why did it tickle so badly?

A loud bang on his bedroom door pulled him from his thoughts, noticing his reflection was now bearing pink dusted cheeks where his tan freckles usually reside. Dream turned his head slightly as the door swung open, Karl bursting into the room in his bright green frog costume. He made his way over to Dream who had turned his attention back to the mirror, messing with the eyeliner again between his palms. The two met eyes in their reflections, Karl’s smile faltering slightly when he realized Dream wasn’t ready yet.

“You’re not even ready! What have you been doing back here all this time, Dream? I mean we know you’re handsome, but seriously.” the blonde shook his head with a smirk, a quick burst of air huffing from his nose at the comment.

“I-I just am having issues with this stupid eyeliner thing. Don’t we have any black paper I can just tape onto my face in strips or something?” Karl rolled his eyes at the comment, taking the eyeliner from Dream and turning his chair so the younger boy could face him . “Why do I even need the whiskers? I have the ears!”

“You can’t be a cat without whiskers, that’s unheard of. What are you, an idiot? Just come here, Dream.” the giggly brunette leaned down, eyeliner in hand as it made a beeline straight for Dream’s right cheek. However, the minute Karl touched the eyeliner down against Dream’s cheek and moved it slightly, the blonde was recoiling back with a yelp before he could process what had even happened.

“What the hell was that for?” Karl was still giggling, trying to assess the situation that was currently playing out. He allowed his eyes to get a good look at Dream, really taking in the details; Dream’s cheeks were bright red, his lips pressed together as he appeared to be struggling to keep his laughter in. It suddenly clicked for Karl, his smile turning into a mischievous grin spreading across his face. He could see the exact moment Dream realized Karl knew what was going on, and he began to cackle as the younger brought his hands up in embarrassment to cover his overheating face.

“Tell me your cheeks aren’t ticklish, Dream. There’s no way,” Karl raised an eyebrow when he saw green eyes peeking out from behind pale hands, a nervous shrug accompanying an anxious giggle that had managed to slip past his fingers. “Oh my gosh, they are!”

Dream groaned through another giggle, finally removing his hands from covering his face and crossing them against his chest with a flustered huff.

“I didn’t know that, okay! But every time I try and draw the stupid whiskers my cheek gets all….you know! And then I mess it up and have to start all over. It’s fucking annoying.” Dream turned his head slightly to point down at the trashcan in the corner of the room, filled to the brim with dark stained tissues, no doubt from the failed attempts with the eyeliner.

“Oh stop, it’s adorable,” Dream rolled his eyes as Karl very clearly tried to stifle his laugh, trying not to embarrass Dream any further than he already was. “Come on, let me help you.”

Dream thought about it for a second before letting out a nervous chuckle, whining slightly as he turned his face back towards Karl.

“I’m gonna try and go fast, okay?” Karl got a grunt back in response and took that as the okay to get started. He tapped the eyeliner down on the top of Dream’s cheek, drawing it out towards his temple slowly. Karl had been trying to make the line as straight as possible, but this task seemed impossible to do with Dream’s cheeks moving due to him trying to suppress his giggles. The curly haired boy couldn’t help the fond smile that was forming everytime Dream’s nose twitched from how bad the pencil was tickling his face. It was fucking adorable.

Dream was sitting surprisingly still through the second whisker, more towards the middle of his cheek and out towards his ear. But when Karl was drawing out the final line, dragging it down towards the blonde’s jaw, Dream flinched violently, causing Karl to draw a line down under his chin instead.

“Dreheam! You just messed me up, you idiot! Now I have to fix it!” he couldn’t help but giggle along with Dream, the blonde fidgeting with his hands in his lap as he tried to keep his hands away from the drying gel on his face.

“I’m sohohorry! I didn’t mehean it, I-I cahan’t help ihit.” The blush was slowly coloring Dream’s neck a light shade of pink, the embarrassment getting to him a little more now that his skin felt even more sensitive with the anticipation of the eyeliner returning to his cheek once again.

“Alright, let me just wipe this off before it stains,” Karl grabbed another tissue from the box, noticing immediately how little was left in the box and how much Dream must have messed up drawing on himself. It made Karls heart feel warm, picturing the younger boy giggling to himself as he tried to draw whiskers on. Karl wiped the black line clean, bringing the pencil down and quickly finishing the line before Dream had time to react. “There! See, that wasn’t so bad.”

“Nohoho, but it feels all tingly and weird.” The blonde refused to make eye contact with the boy standing above him, knowing his blush would probably turn him purple at this point. He heard Karl bark out a laugh at that, making him finally lift his head to see what was so hilarious.

“You can just say your cheeks are ticklish.” Dream’s ears were on fire, his cheeks blazing and spreading throughout his body like a wildfire. He could see goosebumps prickle his skin at the mention of the word, causing an involuntary shiver to run down his spine. Dream rubbed his hands against the thighs of his jeans quickly as a way to release his giddy energy, shrugging and throwing his arms up after a few seconds of silence.

“I’m not saying that!” Dream finally managed to whine out, making Karl laugh even harder.

“Okay cutie, come on. The others are gonna come kill us if we’re not out there in the next ten seconds,” Karl took a step forward, placing a hand on Dream’s left cheek to turn his head slightly for a better angle to draw against. Giggles were already tumbling out of Dream, unable to stop them as Karl once again drew the top line just under his eye. He moved his hands to wring at his shirt, trying to focus on something other than how bad it was tickling.

Karl successfully drew the middle line with little issue, but he knew that this last line would be the issue. They were in the homestretch now, and he was not about to deal with an inpatient Sapnap.

“Alright, last one Dream. Think you can stay still? Or is your jaw too ticklish, too?” Karl teased, a snicker following as Dream’s hand came up to shove against the smaller boy’s hip. He readjusted himself to be back directly in front of Dream, grabbing his chin to hold him in place as Karl went to draw the final line.

“N-nohoho come ohohon! H-Hurry! You’re dohohoing this on puhuhurpose!” Dream was nearly in hysterics as Karl kept a strong grip on Dream’s chin, keeping his head in place as he slowly drew the last whisker.

“KAHAHAHARL NOHOHO!” the brunette couldn’t help but giggle mischievously at that, continuing to go back over the line near his jaw painfully slow. Karl decided to show mercy and finally released him, stepping back to appreciate his work. He spun Dream’s chair around as the last of the giggles finally simmered out to show him the whiskers.

“Oh my gohosh, this is horrible!” Dream let out a wheeze before breaking into cackles, seeing how wobbly the lines on his face were. “What did you even dohoho?!”

“Listen, if I didn’t have such a ticklish canvas it would’ve turned out better than this, okay?” The comment made Dream press his lips together quickly, not wanting to provoke Karl than he already had. Karl smiled and poked his nose with the eyeliner, coloring in a black nose to complete his costume. To his surprise, Dream let out a little squeak when Karl finally pulled the eyeliner away. They shared a look, one that was a mutual understanding. Karl was the first to take the bait though, and the teasing began once again.

“....So, the tip of your nose is ticklish?”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Excuse me?”

“.....I’m sorry?”

“Right. I’ll remember this, Dreamie,” Karl turned on his heels, making his way towards the door to go meet the others that were waiting downstairs. He turned around when he was in the hallway, leaning back through the doorway with a finger pointed at the blonde. “Watch yourself.”

Dream realized he shouldn’t be intimidated by a man in a frog suit, but nonetheless, he swallowed thickly as he made his way towards the door to follow Karl, already planning to be on high alert the rest of the night.

#lee!dream #ler!karl #augtickletober2022 #i got this silly lil idea last night randomly #its cute okay #and spoopy #i love them #mcyt tickle #my stuff #mushie fics #this was done in one stream on consciousness #so if this is weirdly flowed i apologize #this is also scheduled!

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autisticlee · 9 months

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trying to stream on twitch when you are an autistic person who struggles to talk is so hard. you can't make it on there at all if you don't talk constantly, if you don't talk enough or say the right things, if you can't multitasking and converse well with your chat, cant hold conversation with your viewers, etc. normies hate "awkward silences" and will leave your stream if you are quiet for more than a few seconds.

i try to talk but mostly repeat the same scripted things like "oh no" "oops" "don't touch me" "ouch" while playing games. or I do a kind of disjointed narration of what i'm doing like "jump!" "swimming" "aim and shoot"

when people say hi in chat I say the typical scripted "hi how are you" and then struggle to respond to anything else after that, which makes people leave as quickly as they came. I can't improvise talk about things or tell stories like other streamers. I can't have a conversation with chatters.

if I did try to talk about a thing I prescripted (I'll write down things I want to say/talk about and then read them) I have to stop playing my game to talk. people also don't like that. and it takes me like 10 tries to tell the thing even if I read what I wrote down because I mess it up and have to repeat myself.

I prefer to do co-op games in discord calls so other people can talk for me and be entertaining and talk to my chat. but struggling to talk means no one will invite me to play games or accept my invites 😭

then a while back I saw this:

twitch is apparently going to be inconsiderate to disabled streamers. we can't be "consistent" because of bad health days or even months. some of us can't "engage" enough because words and talking hard. ever since I saw this, I haven't streamed. I don't know know if they actually implemented this or are going to but 😬

I might try to stream again when I have time/stop feeling sick. I was streaming genshin impact weekly and daily stuff which might not be most people's interest. I want to stream some art and 3d printed figure painting. I can't talk while doing art stuff so I can play some nice music. but it'll be boring streams 😭 I don't know how to be entertaining and make myself talk a lot 😭

#autistic #autism #actually autistic #speech problems #disabled streamer #twitch streamer #yeah i called allistics normies because i forgot the word allistic and ill keep it because its funny to me #i used to do gta roleplay and could script easier because i had an idea of what my character would do and say and could follow it #if it dodnt make sense then that was because hes not smart and everyone knew that and went along with it #everyone was more accommodating for my rp character than me. i miss doing rp streams. they were easier #acting and not being me is easier apparently #and my character is one that lived in my head since i was a kid. the way he comes out reminds me of how people with DID describe #their switches in their systems. its like he just switches consciousness with me. sometimes he still tries even though i dont rp now 😅#not saying its the same. its probably not right? idk what it is or how to explain it. it was like that with characters in my head as a kid.#he was one of them after all. the main one that came out was called lilly. now i have a friend named lilly. silly coincidence #what am.i rambling about. got off topic #lee rambles

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flospurpura · 8 months

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i feel like I’m going insane ‘cause I dreamed that me and bada were dancing together and we actually got a lot of chemistry and it looked like the start of an AO3 fanfiction i’m actually embarrassed I will spare the details

#stream of consciousness #dream log #bada lee #bada #bada lee x y/n #am i that down bad?#ao3 stuff #i should stop reading and watching stuff about bada #i should touch grass

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i2sunric · 9 days

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HYUNG LINE WHEN THEIR S/O IS INSECURE

𓆩♡𓆪. alternatively — where you are scared of them leaving you.

warnings: mentions of death, guns, overthinking. NOT PROOFREAD.

published: 5th May 2024

wc: 1.2k

taglist: (permanent) @stolasisyourparent @jaeyunsbimbo @jwnghyuns @heelvsted

𓆩♡𓆪. LEE HEESEUNG

You woke up all sweaty, your breath uneven and rushed as you sat up on the bed, Heeseung’s strong arms still wrapped around your waist.

You blinked your eyes, bitter tears rolling down your cheeks. The scene of your dream unfolding right before your eyes, ripping your heart apart.

Your sudden movements caused Heeseung to stir awake, his dear eyes opening “Baby?” He asked, his voice slurred with sleepiness

You dried your tears with your hand “Yes?” You said, trying your best not to give away the shakiness in your voice.

His brows knitted and he sat up beside you “What’s wrong?” Heeseung’s arms wrapped around your shoulder.

A pained sob escaped your lips as you snuggled close to his chest, his expression turning worried “Baby… Talk to me, what’s wrong?”

“I—“ You tried to say but your whole body quivered as you sobbed in his arms. He just rubbed your back, whispering soothing nothings to your ear as he waited for you to calm down.

And when you finally did, you raised your head to meet his gaze, your puffy eyes and red nose making you look so cute.

“I had a bad dream.” You answered, his thumb carefully dried the tear stains under your eyes and cheeks, “Mh? What happened in the nightmare?”

You gulped down, just the thought making you shiver, “We were at the mall and some random guy came with a gun and you protected me when he started shooting.”

Bitter and hot tears burned their way down your cheeks again “You were laying there, bleeding and I could do nothing, I couldn’t move.”

Heeseung’s expression softened and he placed one hand behind your head to pull you on his chest, his arms protecting you in a warm embrace “It was just a dream, Y/N.” He said gently.

“But it felt so real…” You shook your head, gripping his shirt as if he was a lifeline “I’m here, baby, I’m here with you.”

He took your hand and placed it on his cheek to let you know he was alive and there with you. His lips brushed your knuckles, your breath hitching.

“I won’t leave you, but if I ever die protecting you,” Heeseung helped you lay down again, placing the blankets back on your embraced figures “Then I’d die happy.”

He placed a sweet kiss on your forehead “Because you are my life, Y/N. And if there is no you, I don’t want to live.”

𓆩♡𓆪. PARK JAY

There were many sleepless nights where your thoughts wouldn’t leave you a break, making you overthink every choice and every little detail of your life.

No matter how hard you tried, your worries and anguishes never truly left you alone.

And that was how you found yourself standing in front of the large window at yours and Jay’s apartment. With only a thin robe to cover your nightgown you let the cold weather hit your body as you hugged your own arms.

It was in one of those nights that you started questioning wether you truly deserved such a perfect life. Jay was the best thing that ever happened to you, he was like a dream coming true.

He cooked for you, helped you doing the chores, bought you any pretty things you wanted without ever complaining.

He was perfect. Too perfect for someone like you.

Sometimes you thought you didn’t do anything, compared to all the things he did to you. You weren’t good at showing your emotions, at letting Jay know you cared for him the same way he did.

Your stream of consciousness was interrupted when you felt a pair of arms wrap around your waist, “Angel?” Jay’s sleepy voice filled your ear as he snuggled his head on the crook of your neck, hugging you from behind.

“What are you doing up?” He slurred sleepily, caressing your stomach with his thumb.

“Can’t sleep.” You just replied, the feeling of safety Jay brought you only adding to the anguishes making your stomach twist.

With a soft chuckle, Jay tightened his grip around your waist. "Come on now, don't lie to me." He paused, his breath hot on your skin as he sighed. "I know that there's something on your mind again — you're always overthinking, hmm?"

He truly knew you better than anyone else “You got me.” Jay hummed “What’s got you troubled?”

Seeing that you weren’t replying, Jay spun you around so you were facing him. You drank him in, his dark eyes ever so filled with love, his hair all messed from bed and his face puffy.

You smiled sadly and ran your fingers in his tangled hair “I don’t think I deserve you.”

Jay’s eyes widened “What?” He asked, not sure if his mind was playing some trick or if he had heard you correctly.

“I feel like I’m too much, Jay, like I’m always asking you for things just to never give you anything in return.” You sighed, dropping your hand “And I can’t stop overthinking, because maybe you truly deserve someone better than me.”

Jay felt a hundred daggers pierce his heart at your words. How long had you been feeling that way? And how come he had never realised? If anything, he was the one you didn’t deserve.

“No, baby.” He shook his head, his voice rushed and worried. He put his hands on your elbows, needing you close “You are not too much, nor you’ll ever be.”

Jay started, pressing his forehead on yours “I love you more than anything and I couldn’t ask for more than your love.” You let out a small sigh, his words sinking in your head, painting your heart red.

“You’re my girl, the person I want to spend my life with, the woman I want to marry.” He pressed a kiss on your forehead, then down on your brow, “Don’t doubt my feelings for you, you’re everything I could’ve wished for.” He kissed the tip of your nose.

“I love you, Jay.” You whispered, needing him to hear your feelings “I love you too, Y/N. So much.”

𓆩♡𓆪. SIM JAKE

It was just a slip of tongue, something Jake didn’t mean to say to hurt you— just a small detail he had noticed.

It wasn’t even your fault that Layla apparently seemed to like Jake’s ex more. It wasn’t even a big deal, then why were you crying in the bathroom?

You weren’t very in synchrony with dogs, or animals in general since commitment wasn’t your best attribute but you were trying your best to take care of Layla when Jake wasn’t home.

Apparently, you weren’t trying enough because even Jake noticed that Layla didn’t seem to enjoy your company. She’d bark at you and just completely ignore you when you wanted to play or take her out for a walk.

With tears making their way down your pretty face you felt extremely stupid. Why would you even be crying over something so small?

“Baby?” A knock on the door distracted you, making you bit down on your lip to stop your whimpers “You’ve been there for a while, you okay?”

You cleared your throat and replied “Yes, I’ll be out quickly.” You got up and washed your face, trying to get rid of the red marks on your face.

You then opened the door and showed Jake a good fake smile. But he knew you better, he could sense something was wrong.

“Were you crying?” He asked, widening his eyes as he took in the sight of your swollen and red eyes.

His eyebrows shot in surprise and scanned your whole body in search of any injury “Are you hurt? Did you do something?”

“No, no.” You shook your head “I’m fine.”

Jake looked at you with an expression that said he wasn’t believing your bullshit “You clearly aren’t.”

Your lips formed a thin line, “It’s something stupid. Just forget it.” You tried to dismiss it.

He let out a small sigh, “It’s not stupid if it makes you cry.” His voice was barely above a whisper.

“I just have been trying to work it out with Layla.” You looked away, ashamed “But then you said she liked your ex more and I think it brought me down..”

Jake’s eyes widened more, if it was even possible. He had been foolish to make such remark when he knew you were struggling to build a good relationship with his dog.

“Oh, baby.” He wrapped his arms around you, brining you into a tight hug “I’m so sorry I said that, it doesn’t even matter if Layla doesn’t like you yet.”

He caressed the nape of your neck, thumb gently brushing against your skin “You need some time, and you need to stop overthinking this, mh?”

You looked up at him and slowly nodded your head “Good, because you’ll be her mother when I marry you.”

𓆩♡𓆪. PARK SUNGHOON

The pain in your chest made it hard to breath as you watched Sunghoon laughing wholeheartedly with someone— a girl that wasn’t you.

Everyone at Jay’s birthday party seemed to be happy, enjoying themselves while drinking and dancing. But even the loud music was clouded from your negative thoughts.

Sunghoon’s dimples showed with how much he was smiling at the pretty girl, she was so stunning you probably understood why he chose to be with her and not spend time with you.

No— Sunghoon was your boyfriend, why would you ever doubt him? The truth was that you weren’t doubting him, but yourself.

So many insecurities and unspoken worries filled your head until Sunghoon felt your gaze on him and turned his head to face you.

He showed you a warm smile that soon turned into a frown when you didn’t reciprocate it. Ashamed with yourself, you watched the two for the last time before rushing out of the room.

Sunghoon quickly excused himself and ran after you, he went outside and searched for you.

“Y/N?” He asked, looking around for a few seconds before he saw you, curled on yourself as you hovered on the ground, hugging your knees.

He sighed and walked to you, taking off his jacket to place it around your shoulders “Hey.” He kneeled down in front of you, showing you another gentle smile

When he saw you avoided his gaze, he took your chin in his fingers and lifted your head, finally looking into your eyes “What’s the matter, pretty girl?”

You let out a small sigh and shook your head, not wanting to voice out the storm inside your mind.

Sunghoon’s thick brows knitted, his lips forming a thin line “Y/N, what happened?” He asked, his hands on your shoulder, his gaze desperate “Did I do something wrong? Did I mess it up?”

You were quick to shake your head “No, of course not.” He seemed taken aback “Then… Why are you sad?”

Sunghoon was always so sweet and caring with you, he was still trying to get himself to show you how much you mattered, and even if he struggled, he always managed to make you feel like the only girl in the world.

You took a deep breath, your demeanour filling with regret “I’m sorry, Hoon.” You murmured, your gaze falling on the ground again but his fingers brought it back up, gently tapping your chin “I saw you with that girl and I couldn’t help but feel… miserable.”

“Miserable?” Sunghoon asked, his tone quiet “You did nothing wrong, It’s my fault… I keep thinking you’ll eventually leave for someone better.”

Sunghoon helped you stand up, one of his arms sneaking around your waist, brining you close. He used the other to brush a strand of hair out of your face “I understand it’s hard to believe someone cares for you, I do.”

His voice was so gentle “But please baby,” He held your face in his palm “Believe me when I say I never want anyone else, and if I get to have you for the rest of my life, I could never ask for more.”

Your breath hitched at his oh so romantic confession, making the air taste sweeter. He pressed a featherlight kiss on your lips, just to deepen it.

The kiss held all your unspoken feelings, making the worries disappear with its magic “Let’s go home now,” Sunghoon murmured on your lips “I want to hold you and cuddle until we fall asleep.”

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thottyimagines · 3 months

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Who in Naruto would stand on business and not text their ex or situationship back and who actually would

ABSOLUTELY texting their ex:

Naruto, which is canon, I think. I've little knowledge of Boruto, but I'm pretty sure he and Sasuke exchange carrier pigeons, like, all the time. Naruto would text an ex without any prompting, let alone texting them back.

Sakura has shockingly little self-esteem or respect or dignity when it comes to romance, and she's more than willing to entertain anyone interested in her who isn't a total uggo (re: Rock Lee and any other not-conventionally attractive suitor).

Deidara has no concept of boundaries or closure. He thinks he can just keep sending a stream of consciousness. If his ex ever texts him first, he's going to town on the diary entries sort of texts. He's opening his notes app and copying and pasting all the weird poetry he's been writing since the break up.

Sasuke, but ONLY if it's Naruto.

Kakashi wouldn't text an ex back, but if he got a text, he'd show up in person and just...see what happens.

Choji wouldn't know how to not text back, because he'd feel mean, given their shared history. It's anyone's guess as to whether or not he still has romantic intentions.

Rock Lee is texting back with pleasure. A splendid new friend out of the ruins of romance has emerged!

Hashirama and Madara. Just...just look at them.

Jiraiya, in hopes of a booty call coming out of it.

Tempted, but should pull through:

Ino would love to text back just for the drama, but has a healthy amount of self-respect. If there's no reason to reconcile, there's no reason for her to talk, she can sadly admit.

Hinata would, ordinarily, want to text back, but she might just get too stressed and her teammates could find her in time to rebuke the ex's efforts.

Similarly, Itachi has poetry at the ready to send through, but Kisame might just eat his phone to prevent the Young Adult Meltdown that would ensue.

Hidan, if his feeling are well and truly hurt enough, wouldn't text back. But...well, he might show up to their location and give Jashin a real good day.

Kurenai went years without Asuma showing his face, whilst he was running around defying his father, so she should be fine ignoring the siren song of an ex text. But then...

Oh, Neji has paragraphs upon paragraphs to send living right there in his notes app, but he shan't. He won't. He'll just send them rancid vibes whenever they encounter one another in public for life.

Not texting back:

Shikamaru hasn't the energy to entertain this. Things ended for a reason, and he shan't make himself miserable doing a back and forth in the aftermath. Blocked.

Kiba's sister won't let him text his exes back. She blocks them on his phone as soon as the break up happens. Kiba has no idea they tried to reach out.

Asuma has no interest in texting unless it's for a booty call.

Gaara is too afraid of his wounded pride unleashing the monster within, so he doesn't entertain highly emotional interactions like this.

Kakuzu is straight up tracing the text back to his ex and turning them in for bounty, no matter how meager it is.

Shino agonizes over it, but he prevails.

Tenten talks it over with Neji, who just beats up her ex for her instead.

Genma has deleted their number as soon as they stopped hooking up. Who dis?

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lastweeksshirttonight · 8 months

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I've been recapping Strike Force Five both for my followers who can't access or don't really have time to listen to the episodes, and also for myself to get more comfortable with longform writing, something I was doing as well with reviews of S1 episodes of Last Week Tonight. (I promise I will keep doing those, I know they keep falling by the wayside.) Going into episode three of the show, I know I have to address Jimmy Fallon and his toxic workplace, the news of which dropped as I was listening to the third episode of SFF for the first time. Putting this below the cut, and I'm going to be mentioning toxic workplaces, alcoholism, and maybe getting more personal than I need to again, so trigger warning for those.

To start, every worker deserves a safe, non-toxic workplace. This is the LEAST a company can do for their employees as far as I'm concerned. The things a toxic workplace will do to your mental and physical health are things I don't wish on anyone, and things I'm still wrestling with after being two years removed from one of the worst environments I was ever in. The stories that Fallon's staffers tell ring extremely true, from weaponized HR to cruel, dehumanizing showrunners/CEOs, and crying rooms. I want the best for them and hope, despite the very bad "I'm sorry if you were offended" apologies given by NBC staff and Fallon, that there are concrete efforts taken to provide them with a much better, safer workplace. Those apologies don't give me much hope right now, unfortunately.

The other thing is that I really hope Fallon commits to some sort of treatment for his obvious alcoholism. It's been an open secret for decades at this point - the article dances around it but anyone with even a modicum of knowledge about the New York comedy scene knows this. Again, I don't wish alcoholism on anyone. It's a horrible, destructive disease. But I don't think that the culture rot at Late Night can be fully addressed unless Fallon makes an effort to get help.

I've struggled with excessive social drinking and alcoholism runs in my family. It's almost impossible to get out of that hole until you realize you need to make the change. I hope this is the push to get him out of that hole. This isn't me trying to avoid holding him accountable for his part in making his show so toxic, far from it. This is me, coming from a similar place where I had to work incredibly hard to rebuild my life because of the shitstain behavior I perpetuated while drunk, recognizing someone that needs to do the same work to make things right in some way.

I thought about making this part of the recap for Strike Force Five episode 3, but it didn't feel appropriate. I don't know if I will recap the third episode, honestly, and if I do, it won't likely be for a bit, or at least until I know what the future of this podcast is. Last week, episodes dropped on Wednesday and Saturday, and there's noticeably no fourth episode as of today (Sunday). The part of this that sucks is that listening to the show DOES help the staff of all these late-night shows monetarily, including Fallon's, and I want to continue to support them. (Because it will come up, I do financially donate to multiple strike funds as well. You should do the same, if you're in a position to.) It's, understandably, a mess.

In the end, I just really want things to improve for Fallon's staff. It'll take a lot of work, but it's not impossible to turn things around.

#strike force five #lee's stream of consciousness #jimmy fallon #john oliver #stephen colbert #jimmy kimmel #seth meyers #tw: alcoholism #i may delete this later just bc i don't know if anyone genuinely wanted my thoughts on this #i just needed to get the thoughts out

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leejeann · 10 months

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Made my first pair of crocheted baby booties the other day and it made me think maybe that “Baby shoes for sale. Never worn” thing isn’t a tragic story and rather is just a local craftsperson advertising their work

#lee speaks #this is late night stream-of-consciousness-post hours I guess

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sunfleursgarden · 7 months

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us against the world - lee juyeon

inspired by taylor swift’s champagne problems.

pairings: ex! juyeon x fem! reader

genre: angst! fluff (if you squint)

synopsis: After running away from his proposal, all Juyeon could ever think about was where it all went wrong. Showing up to your house with a heavy heart is something you weren’t ready for, but Juyeon is certain that he wants you in his life, you were simply hesitant.

warnings: angst! mentions of alcohol and blood, slight fluff (if you squint), few curse words are mentioned, somewhat forbidden love, juyeon calls you baby twice

word count: 2.7k words

note: OH MY GOD! this is my first ever publish on tumblr. i’ve been pondering a lot on whether to give this story a happy or sad ending, but hey, we’ll see... and by the way!! this is inspired by taylor swift’s champagne problems!! have fun reading !! (proofread once)

“Will you marry me?”

Splashing that tightly corked bottle of champagne, the high-spirited crowd gleamed in triumph, smiles plastered on their faces as they cheered the two of you on. His not-so-receptive relatives anticipated every minute whilst you were hesitant. You were unfathomable.

“I love you, Y/n. I’d like to spend the rest of my life loving and taking care of you.”

“Juyeon... What are you doing?” You mumbled. He was still down on one knee as he held a small velvet jewelry box. Juyeon gave you a sweet smile—a smile you know you didn't deserve.

“I'm sorry.” those were the last words you said. Juyeon’s eyebrows furrowed, confused about why you suddenly acted that way. You felt everyone’s gaze, your chest felt heavy. Staring at Juyeon, you gave him an apologetic look. He still couldn't process what was going on.

You had this forethought to run. The moment you ran, no one dared to move an inch. That moment screamed in silence. Running away from the person who desired to spend their life with you, you couldn’t prompt yourself to walk down that aisle carrying weight on your shoulders instead of flowers in your hands.

Guilt filled up your petrified heart. Absurd flashbacks start surrounding you, a champagne bottle in one hand, and a broken heart in the other. You’ve never been cognizant of how things developed into this. Perhaps you perceived that instances would change the second Juyeon’s once flexible plans became too vague and secretive for you to comprehend. You were always aware that you were preparing to get down on one knee, your friends even spoiled the surprise just for you, but you simply weren’t eager and ready for it. You and Juyeon were too different. The moment you dropped Juyeon's trembling hand as you two danced the night away, you knew you never deserved any of this.

As you ran whilst having blurry eyesight due to tears streaming down your face, it caused you to fall down the stairs and leave you bleeding on the floor. You could barely recall being put inside an ambulance and merely regained consciousness after hours of being inside the hospital.

Juyeon was beside you the entire time. Yet you couldn’t stand that, knowing he's the reason why you broke down in the first place.

After you got discharged from the hospital, you never spoke to Juyeon again. You started to disregard his phone calls, block his texts, and ignore the constant knock on your door because you know damn well that it’s Juyeon.

He doesn’t deserve this. He doesn’t deserve the life you're willing to offer.

But he’d rather be hurt by you over and over again than not having you at all.

Six months had gone by.

If there’s one thing that you’ve learned during your healing, it was that your feelings were like waves. At a certain point, you realize that you’ve fully moved on and the waves have subsided, albeit the next thing you know the waves become rogue, and you’re sobbing with your head in your hands, missing what no longer was.

It’s raining. The continuous pour of water droplets reminded you of your uncontrollable tears during the last six months. You had this thought creating space inside your brain for it to wander around, it kept on asking how he was. And as if the Gods have heard your mind’s calling, a knock was heard from the door.

Looking through the peek hole, it’s as if your heart stopped beating once you saw the person on the other side.

Lee Juyeon.

You swore that if this was a dream, you’d never sleep again if it meant reminiscing or recreating distant memories. Trying to pinch yourself, you cursed over and over again, knowing for a fact that this is certainly not one of those reveries.

It took everything in you to get your trembling hand towards the doorknob and open it to reveal a drenched and intoxicated Juyeon. He reeked of alcohol—which you could already tell considering him holding a bottle in his right hand. You hated the smell, you hated that his wet figure casually made the floor of your patio slippery, but most importantly—you hated having him here.

“Why are you here, Juyeon?” You asked, surprising yourself that you did not stutter. Juyeon’s eyes met yours and stayed there, he didn't even dare to move an inch.

‘No. Not those eyes. Don’t give me those eyes.’ you thought.

“Can we please talk?” You let out a sigh. If you had a dollar every time you heard those four words during the last six months, you could probably buy yourself a car.

“Stop it. Stop hurting yourself.”

“I’m not,” He responded, but his state right now tells you otherwise.

He’s been visiting you almost every week in spite of you ignoring him. He’s been texting you nonstop. He’s been showing up just when you thought that you've finally gotten over him.

It’s hard to let go of the person you love, but it’s even harder to hold onto something that can no longer render love. The only constant thing in the world is change, it’s inevitable. Who knew that along with the seasons, your feelings would change too?

Six months ago, you were still happy with Juyeon. Six months ago, you were still in this fairytale-like romance that never failed to sweep you off your feet. You never knew that things would indeed change for the worse.

That one night, that one forethought. It all turned into something bigger than you could possibly visualize. As he got down on one knee, thoughts and notions began to consume your fragile mind, drowning you in a sea of overthinking.

His parents never liked you. You would often feel his mother’s cold gaze towards you during gatherings, and his father can’t even look you in the eye. No matter how many times he tried to persuade them, you know for a fact that they despise you.

They weren’t even there when he proposed.

Who knew that it all took you a small velvet jewelry box to conclude that Juyeon was exceedingly out of your league?

You could tell that his parents were glad—no, relieved that you ended things with Juyeon. And you know for a fact that during the last six months, they’ve been setting their son up with hyper-privileged women with rich-ass companies. They were nothing compared to you and the life you have. This made your stance even stronger because ending it all was probably for the best.

“Stop making it harder than it already is, Juyeon.”

“Just talk to me. Please. Just this once.” Those disconcerting brown eyes staring into yours.

Finally giving in, you let him inside your house. Aware that his clothes were still dripping, you rushed to your closet and grabbed the sweater that he gave you, the sweatpants that he left, and a towel.

Mentally cursing at yourself for still keeping his things, you handed it all to him and pointed towards the bathroom without saying a word.

“Thank you,” He muttered.

He placed his bottle of alcohol down your coffee table and directed himself inside the bathroom. You simply watched his statuesque figure as he closed the door. You let out an exasperated sigh, wondering what may happen.

As he got out, you couldn’t stop yourself from staring at him. He looked good, but his aura screamed in agony and despair. You could tell how much he’s been through. He sat beside you, but he wasn’t too close. You cleared your throat and moved a bit further from him.

“Can we talk now?” He asked. His voice sounded desperate, the way he said it sounded more like a plea rather than a question.

“Go on. We can talk until the rain stops,” You responded, simply staring out the window as rain came pouring down.

"Where did it all go wrong?" You turned your head to face him.

“Nothing went wrong, Ju—”

“No. Something did. We were happy, Y/n. It was us against the world.” He cut you off.

“That's the thing, Juyeon,” You stood up from the couch, still facing him. “We were against the world. No one liked me, Juyeon. Not even your family. That’s when I realized that maybe I was the problem. Hell, that's when I fucking realized that maybe I was too selfish. A selfish bitch that cared only about her own happiness when in fact you were exceedingly out of my league. We wouldn’t live a happy marriage even if we wanted to.”

“And you’d really let them define us?” This time Juyeon was the one who stood up to face you.

“I didn’t want to, Juyeon. But they made it so fucking hard for me! I could barely comprehend my thoughts whenever I was around them. They made me feel as if I did not have a place for you in your life. They made me feel as if I’m some kind of phase for you!”

“Y/n, do you know how hard it is for me to hear you cry yourself to sleep every night when we were together?”

Without realizing it, tears started streaming down your face. “It hurts me so damn much. I never cared about what people had to say regarding our relationship. I just focused on our happiness.” He continued.

“I did too. But it was all too much for me. They suffocated me too much just so I could let go of you. It made me realize a lot of things—that you deserve gold yet I was penniless. That you deserve flowers, but I can’t plant them even if my life depended on it.” You told him using nonsense metaphors to claim your case.

“There are so many more women who deserve you,”

“I don’t care about them, Y/n! I just want you in my life.”

“They’re better than me.”

“If it’s not you, then I don’t want it.”

You didn’t reply.

“I wanted to run away with you, Y/n. Run away to the life we both want without anyone telling us how to live our life.” You were too silent for his own liking, but he continued to talk.

“That night when I proposed, I expected you to say yes because I thought that you’d rather spend your life with me than break things off just ‘cause other people wanted us to.”

“I bought tickets, Y/n. I bought plane tickets to Paris. I remember you telling me how much you wanted to go there. I already pictured us there, getting married and starting our new life without suffocating ourselves in people’s demands.”

Saying that you were shocked by his revelation is an understatement. You never realized that he could’ve thought all of it through. You thought that you only kept your pain to yourself, when in fact Juyeon already had the plans for both of you secured.

“Y-You really did?”

“I did,” he moved closer to you. “But instead of a flight with you to Paris, all I had was a night train home all alone.”

You started to visualize it. An audible sigh escaped Juyeon’s lips as the sound of the train tracks echoed across his head, booking the night train might’ve somehow helped his repudiating state. He must’ve sat there alone, nothing but hurt and misery filling up his bones.

“I didn't know that.” You closed your eyes, not bearing to look at him.

“That's when I got a call from your mother, saying that you got in an accident,” You finally got the courage to look him directly in the eye without a teardrop falling down your cheek. Albeit, Juyeon’s eyes started to become teary. You felt bad. You felt guilty.

“I fell. I wasn’t thinking straight. I had the urge to run away and I did.”

“I was with you during your recovery. Your convalescent body made me weak. It made me think that I should’ve done more to avoid your overthinking. I should’ve reassured you more.”

You vividly remember how your mother went on and on about Juyeon’s stay with you while you were still confined at the hospital. She kept on telling you how Juyeon would never leave the room even if your mother told him to. Juyeon would sleep whilst sitting on the unstable plastic chair near your bed just in case you woke up.

You started to regret pushing him away the moment you regained consciousness. His frown clearly displayed devastation, but you were too caught up in your own emotions to grasp the importance of having him beside you.

“I should’ve told you I love you no matter what other people say.” Juyeon cupped your cheeks, you looked at him as the two of you continuously shed tears. You placed your hands on him, caressing them. He wiped away your tears and gave you a warm smile.

That smile. That benign curve between the corners of his lips gets you every single time.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for doubting us. I’m sorry for letting other people tell us otherwise.” You started apologizing nonstop. You could feel your eyes becoming puffy, and your cheeks becoming warm. You simply held Juyeon’s hands and looked at him, not leaving his gaze.

“Shh. I don’t blame you for feeling that way. Your feelings are valid. You are always valid. You shouldn’t change your ways just because they tell you to. You should distance yourself from people who make you feel as if you don’t deserve to be here.” all you can do now is smile. Although tears are still forming in your eyes, you now feel safe.

“You’re not hard to understand, Y/n.” Those simple words were enough to make your heart melt. Despite confusion still lingering, you could care less now that you're within Juyeon’s embrace.

Juyeon wiped your tears, he looked at you with so much love. As if the last six months have been nothing but a burden to him. As you started to conceptualize the future, you came to conclude that you don't need to do that. You realize that with Juyeon, you shouldn’t ponder over anything or anyone and simply focus on each other.

“We'll make it through together, okay? I promise.”

He brought you to the couch to sit down. He then grabbed the alcohol bottle he brought with him the moment he came and simply threw it in the bin. Juyeon has your house memorized from ceiling to floor, and he can easily tell that nothing has changed. He went to the kitchen to fetch you a glass of water and soon gave it to you as he sat down beside you.

Muttering a small “thank you”, you wiped your tears and smiled at him.

“Won't it be hard?” You asked, placing the glass down.

“What will?” He asked, fixing your hair as he tucked a strand behind your ear.

“Constantly trying to keep me reassured, me getting 'what ifs', and having a hard time coping up with everyone's say.”

Juyeon didn’t say anything yet, but he pulled you into an embrace. Playing with your hair, he started to talk, “Keeping you reassured isn’t a problem, you’re my responsibility. It’s my job to keep you assured. Just tell me all of your thoughts, alright? I’ll help you get through it.”

You released from the hug. Juyeon cupped your face and caressed it gently which made you melt in his touch.

“Can we take our time?” You asked. Juyeon gave you a reassuring nod and kissed you on the forehead.

“Always, baby.” the endearment made your heart flutter.

“Wanna order something?”Juyeon nodded, “You also need to get rid of your hangover.”

“Hey! I wasn’t drunk! I didn't even finish the bottle.” Juyeon protested which caused you to giggle. You missed this. You missed him a lot.

After ordering food, the both of you cuddled with your back facing his front as his arms held you close. It was all you ever wanted.

Perhaps it had to go like this. Perhaps the distance between the both of you for the last six months was all you two need in order to breathe and grow together. Perhaps you two were meant to break and fall back together again. Whatever it is, happiness is all you ever want.

And your happiness meant being with Juyeon regardless of the ridicule and hatred your relationship got from people surrounding the two of you.

“What if the rain stops now?” You joked, looking back at him.

“You won’t be able to get rid of me, baby. I’ll always be with you.”

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127luvr · 4 months

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poison ☆⋆ ୨ৎ ⋆☆

lee haechan x male reader (nsfw)

in which haechan is a rookie actor starring beside you in his breakout role.

there are tears streaming down donghyuck's face. tears that leave tracks down his rosy cheeks, dragging the eye makeup that was touched up not too long ago.

it's hard to look him in the eyes. to play your part opposite him as he stares up at you from his position--thighs spilling out of his shorts as he kneels on fake grass. but he isn't nct's lee haechan right now. he's not even rookie actor lee donghyuck--starring as the second lead in his first official role--no. now played his character as you played yours.

you remember it's just an act. just a game. just a role. just a little longer before you can leave the villain behind you.

"i wish i cared about your tears." your fingers find their way onto donghyuck's face. the flash of surprise in his eyes gone as quickly as it came as you deviated from the script. your thumb rests on his right cheek--with your index and middle finger just under the left side of his jaw. you move his head up to keep facing you, bringing your eyebrows in to feign innocence. "but i just don't."

"cut!" it takes you longer than a second to retract your hand from donghyuck's tear-stained face. he is still watching you with curious eyes, tears halting as soon as the director walked towards the two of you. "that's a wrap for today guys. we'll look over the footage and see if we need to reshoot any of the scenes. personally, i think we got it done." he turns his full attention to you, mouth in a wide grin when he places his hand on your shoulder, "(y/n), amazing job on adding to the character. it gave us chills. feel free to improvise more on the character whenever it feels necessary."

finally, he looks down at donghyuck--who is still in the kneeling position you left him in. his face is unreadable under the production lights. "haechan, you're really going places. we made the right choice with you."

leaving the role behind is hard. even as you rest your head on the white vanity they provided in your dressing room. it's quiet in here. the mood lighting providing you with a sense of ease--something the lights on set could never do. there's a plethora of fan letters that stick to the wall you're facing, the words of affirmation you could make out livening your mood significantly.

you let your eyes close for a moment, relishing in the static that is provided behind your eyelids. you don't intend on dozing off. not as you sit at the edge of your cushioned chair with your back arched. but you let your mind take you back to the set. back to just half an hour ago when haechan was staring up at you with wide brown eyes and blood stained lips. you can picture the bare skin of his thighs, sun kissed and infested with moles. so close that you could reach out and touch them but so far away.

your state between consciousness and unconsciousness has you miss the knock on your door. it has you miss the way donghyuck turns the doorknob slowly to peek behind it. he calls your name once or twice before he walks in carefully.

"y/n." he stops next to your chair, admiring the way your hair fans out on top of your vanity desk. he's relieved you're facing away from the door. taking the time to really take all of you in. he's grown used to this. admiring you from afar. you weren't an easy person to get close to on set--being his senior in the field. you were an intimidating person to speak to in and out of your role, something donghyuck was attracted to the most. your confidence in your talent inspired him. but it doesn't stop him from tapping your right shoulder, behind his knees so that his head was level with yours as you stirred. "hey. i'm sorry for inviting myself in but we're going out for drinks, would you want to join?"

you turn your head to face him, startled by how close he was to you. the nearness has you sit up immediately, rubbing at your eyes as you readjust to the light again.

"count me in, donghyuck."

"just hyuck is fine."

you pay your drink no mind. not as you sit comfortably with your back pressed against the faux leather of the booth. you're too busy watching donghyuck socialize with the cast.

even outside of hair and makeup, donghyuck glows. his bare skin stands out even in the restaurant's dim lighting. the moles previously hidden by a concealer too light for his face now more pronounced. you watch his dainty hands dance up and down jinyoung's arms and shoulders as they laugh together.

you circle a finger on the rim of your glass, wondering where the two of you went wrong in getting to know each other more intimately. the first read through of the script with the two of you went phenomenally--even the chemistry on set was praised by cast and crew.

he was one of the reasons it was hard for you to readjust back to reality after certain scenes. his acting was too believable. however, outside of the filming, getting to know him was hard. nothing but niceties exchanged. he made small talk between the two of you impossible. conversations were cut short in order to keep your dignity intact--too scared to stumble over words as he stared at you with inviting eyes and pouty lips.

you can only take so much of his well manicured nails on jinyoung before you excuse yourself, squeezing between jiwoo and the table.

the restroom lighting is nothing more than a few fixtures next to the mirrors. you place your hands on the sink, bowing your head to avoid facing your own reflection. this feeling was unjustifiable. unreasonable. you barely knew anything about donghyuck, you didn't have the right to feel any jealousy towards anyone that had the pleasure of receiving his affection.

"y/n!" donghyuck's voice snatches you away from your thoughts, his cheery voice masking the sound of him locking the door to the restroom. "you disappeared, sunbaenim~ are you secretly a lightweight?"

you watch him through the mirrors. his leather jacket from earlier gone, with bare arms on full display as he sports a sleeveless white shirt. your heartbeat quickens. his teasing tone causing you to turn and face him, leaning back against the cool sink. this is the first time he's spared you a glance since you got here. his cheeks flushed with the influence of the alcohol he's been sipping all night.

he places his hands on your chest, staring up at you through his eyelashes. you bring your hands dangerously close to his hips, keeping him balanced upright as he balls his fists against your shirt. "why don't you pay any attention to me, sunbae?"

donghyuck's presence alone is intoxicating. providing you with a certain dizziness that no alcohol in the world could amount to. he causes your mind to blank--all sensibility thrown out of the window as his hooded eyes stare only at your parted lips. you lick them subconsciously, watching as he swallows nervously in return.

you grab his jaw like you did on set, worried that your nerves make it all the way down to your fingertips but you pay it no mind. not as you bring him closer to your face, now only centimeters apart. you're too scared to look him in his eyes, your gaze falling on his lips.

you bring your fingers to touch his bottom lip, parting it at the center, "hyuck, can i kiss y-"

he doesn't let you finish your sentence. barely giving you enough time to react by removing your hand from his lips. you bring it to the back of his head as he crashes his lips on yours. his nose poking at your cheek as he turns his head, drinking you in as if you were a glass of water he reached for in the middle of the night. he presses your body against the sink, the edge of the marble digging into your back as he towers over you.

it's uncomfortable.

your shirt rides up, with donghyuck's cold hands running up and down your torso. you want him to keep his hands on you, to keep his weight on you and think of only you. but he's getting impatient. his kisses only getting sloppier as he brings his hands down to your waist line. it's dangerous.

"hyuck-" you pull away first, taking in deep breaths to catch your breath but donghyuck doesn't let you go. he latches onto your neck, kissing and biting the same spot over and over. you bite your lip to suppress a moan, looking towards the door in fear of someone hearing you--or worse--walking in. "hyuck someone can walk in-"

"i locked the door." his voice vibrates against your skin as he finds another section to latch onto. his tongue tracing over a spot where your neck ends and your clavicle begins.

his confession doesn't ease you. you wonder instead just how long he was planning on doing this with you. the moment he walked into the restroom? or when he had his hands on jinyoung sitting across the table from you? or was it when he invited you out with the rest of the crew?

his hands reach the top of your thighs finally and you feel your pants tighten. but you don't give him the satisfaction. instead, you grab his wrists, standing upright as you guide him to the nearest wall. he is reluctant to giving you the control you've been fighting for from the start. he is starved from touching--from kissing--from biting at your skin as you hold him in place, showcasing your full height. you have him with his back to the wall, arms pinned up above his head with both wrists locked in one of your hands.

"y/n~" he's whiny. yearning for more as he tries--and fails--to break from your hold. but it's only making him hotter. the struggle. the fight for who was really in charge. "please."

there are many things about donghyuck that almost make you give in. to give him exactly what he wants. from his swollen lips to his slightly damp hair that produces small waves in contrast to his previously pin-straight hair. but you don't give him the satisfaction. not as he flaunts his tan arms in front of you. you lean in, a hint of your lips brushing against the bottom of his ear. he halts what he is doing, letting his body lean against the wall.

"not here, donghyuck."

#nct #nct u #nct 127 #nct dream #lee haechan #lee donghycuk #haechan x male reader #donghyuck x male reader #nct x male reader #x male reader #<3

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azure-firecracker · 3 months

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ATLA Live Action Episode 3: Overall Thoughts.

This episode felt a lot stronger than the previous two! I felt like the actors were settling into their characters and the group dynamics (particularly between our main 3) felt a lot stronger and more natural.

Omashu was a really fun setting and the chaotic environment made for some great scenes (especially the Aang/Zuko fight).

Sebastian Amoruso and Lucian-River Chauhan were both big acting standouts. For how young he is, Teo had great presence and really believable delivery even on some really clunky lines. Jet was oozing charisma, and I as a viewer really felt for him and understood where he was coming from.

Ozai had a really strong introduction. I like that he’s menacing without having to yell and Daniel Dae Kim does a great job of making him feel eerily normal when he talks which is all the more unnerving.

Highlight of the episode was definitely the Azula scenes. Of course I, personally, was anticipating this, but I like that they’re letting Lizzy Yu be scary and sassy and emotionally expressive. In her first scene, she goes through so many different feelings from evil glee to fear to being desensitized to violence to mockery to insecurity and anxiety, but it doesn’t come across as over the top even for such a non-emotional character. She comes across as a nuanced character instantly, and I loved that. I hope that continues (Mai and Ty Lee-ESPECIALLY Ty Lee-were great as well).

And my lowlight was once again Katara. Her writing frustrates me so much. Aren’t we past the point of having our female leads be so passive while the male characters lead the way and show them everything? She feels like a relic of the past and it baffles me that a 2005 cartoon did this so much better. It shouldn’t be this way!

I did see some glimpses of her anger/spirit towards the end, especially with Jet, so hopefully that continues to come through. If it does I’ll enjoy the show more.

I’ll rank this a 7.75/10. Really enjoyable, improving a lot, but Katara’s writing is really dragging it down, especially since she gets such a focus in this one.

#atla #atla live action #natla #netflix atla #avatar the last airbender #atla stream of consciousness #aang #zuko #jet #teo #ozai #azula #ty lee #katara

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bruh-changbin · 11 months

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patience is a virtue (teaser)

part 3 of invasion of privacy series

pairing: lee heeseung x afab roommate!reader

genre: smut, angst (minors dni)

word count: 7k

synopsis: third and final installment of loser roommate heeseung series. read part 1 here. read part 2 here.

posting: august 2-4

taglist is open

order confirmed. you will be updated when your food is en route for delivery.

as if on cue, heeseung’s stomach lets out a cavernous growl. he pats it comfortingly as if to say ‘it’s ok, soon you’ll be filled to the brim with an ice cold baja blast and 2 crunch wrap supremes. just hold on a little longer.’

nothing quite like eating away all of your sorrows.

it’s easy to forget how pivotal a kitchen is in one’s everyday life until it’s stripped away from you like a baby from its mother. ok, maybe not stripped away. more like consciously avoiding it to make sure that you don’t have an awkward run in with your roommate who performed oral sex on you several days ago and is now sending you mixed signals. the thought of having to hold an actual conversation with you makes heeseungs skin crawl.

he’s been successfully avoiding you for 4 days now, ensuring that he only leaves his room when absolutely necessary - and only doing so when he’s positive that you’re in your room or out of the house. before exiting his bedroom he spends minutes with his ear pressed up to his flimsy bedroom door, making sure the coast is clear before making a break for it.

one may think he’s being extra. just talk to her for crying out loud! but heeseung has managed to convince himself that you think he’s bottom of the barrel scum; the last piece of bread that always gets tossed; the mosquito on your wall that you whack with a rolled up newspaper as soon as you see it.

trash!

and so, he spends his days rotting away in his bedroom, his mattress now donning a permanent indent of the shape of his body; his trash can overflowing with wrappers from taco bell and mcdonalds; his laptop struggling to keep up with all of the mind-numbing streaming of shitty television he’s been doing.

one time he gave into his hopeless romantic side and watched the notebook but it made him cry so hard he woke up with a migraine. now, he sticks to scrolling through tik tok and watching reruns of below deck sailing yacht and survivor.

he can feel his eyes starting to get heavy when a vibration from his phone jolts him back to reality, scrambling to find the device that he so mindlessly tossed underneath his comforter. his fingers finally come in contact with it, and he peers at the lit-up screen.

your food has been delivered. receipt/tip available.

yes! it feels as if his stomach has been quite literally eating itself for the past half hour, so heeseung leaps up at the prospect of soon having food in his belly. in fact he’s so excited at the idea of his taco bell order waiting for him that the thought of doing his ritualistic check to make sure he won’t have a run-in with you completely slips his mind.

so, when he swings open his door and bolts down the hallway, head filled with nothing but thoughts of chowing down on a tortilla filled with meat, lettuce and cheese, his heart practically falls to his stomach when instead he almost literally runs into you. you, holding a glass of water with your eyes wide like a fawn, taking in heeseungs dishevelled appearance after not seeing him for over half a week.

shit.

#enhypen smut #lee heeseung smut #heeseung smut #enhypen imagines #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen blurbs #enhypen x reader #lee heeseung x reader #heeseung x reader #lee heeseung fanfiction #lee heeseung blurbs #heeseung fanfiction #heeseung blurbs

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