I think we should all go out for drinks, smokes, & deserts when J* R****** dies. Then we should resurrect her only to put her 6 feet under again!

I think I need to just do a self indulgent pride portrait because pride art generally makes me dysphoric and depressed lol

fleein the south part II

hi, i'm ri & i'm an autistic nonbinary trans guy-lite-ish person. 4 years ago i moved out to denver from mississippi (where i was born & raised) & immediately had a massive improvement in my quality of life. i was able to access medical & psychiatric care, my career stabilized, people were addressin me with correct terms for the most part, & i was startin to feel like life had finally begun

unfortunately when the lease ran out on our house end of summer last year my roommates decided not to renew, & then the people who were gonna be my new roommates backed out last minute. in a panic i looked for other options but with time runnin short & top surgery approachin i decided to recover at a friend's house & move back to mississippi once my surgeon cleared me to travel cross country so i could regroup somewhere i figured would be less expensive & at least somewhat familiar

that, friends, was a very costly & painful mistake! every single problem that made me wanna move away in the first place has only exacerbated!

i'm comin up on 8 months post top surgery, i have a beard, & i'm still gettin called ma'am/she/her. trump flags & signs still adorn many yards/porches here. hatred & bigotry run rampant in local politics. the other day i didn't even enter one of the convenience stores in the town where i live when i stopped by because they had posted a very thinly veiled racist sign on the door

when i arrived back here i was not even a full month outta surgery & i had a minor complication, so i went to the emergency room cause what else was i sposed to do? applied for charity as i had around $100 to my name at that point, which i THINK? got approved? also applied for mississippi medicaid the same day, which got denied almost outright as i have no children. so i've been uninsured since november & rationin the 3 month supply of my psych/migraine meds i received before leavin colorado for goin on 7 months. never mind bein able to access hrt!

job prospects here are Not Great! i've had to collect unemployment for a while as i cannot for the life of me find a full time job with a livin wage. otherwise i literally cannot make ends meet as the jobs i've held so far down here are payin average 50% or less of what i was makin in denver. even with the part time gigs i've had i have yet to crack 30hr/wk on any kind of regular basis

housin is an absolute shitshow. my lease is up 1 july (got a month extension) & i've been searchin everywhere for an affordable place of my own or at least a good roommate. the more affordable studio/1bd apartments go for around $700 & up, but most have income requirements of 2.5-3x the monthly rent which, considerin previous point abt wages, is near impossible. roommate listins are available but the majority are questionable at best & seekin a live-in bangmaid at worst

with all these considerations i spent the past few weeks feelin worse & worse lookin for somewhere close to the job i currently have. the leases are like 6mo-1y so i was picturin another year down here & how i was gonna survive, let alone thrive. my thoughts got darker & darker. i'd wake up in the mornin & be sad/disappointed i'd survived the night

this is no way to live

i snapped a few days ago. said to myself "if i'm destined to struggle wherever i go, i'd rather do it somewhere i actually Wanted to be in the first place" & started applyin for housin in denver. waitin to hear back from my first option & have secured a backup with a friend with a spare room for 6mo in case that falls through

right now i need help gettin the hell out! i've got first month's rent already put back, i can continue to collect unemployment until i land a good job in denver, & i'm already reachin out to find somewhere to work. i just don't have anywhere to go for another month or two to save the money i'll need to travel almost 1200mi (~1900km) back to colorado. i'll need at least $500 to make gas/food happen durin the time it will take me to get there, & i need it by the first of july (38 days from day of postin)

please help me escape!!!

ca: $jupitervega

vmo: jupitervega

ppal

please please please donate whatever you're able! pls boost!

thank u so much for readin, pls have an item from my emergency happy photo folder for yr enjoyment

Gale x Trans Masc Reader (Mature)

I have so many in universe head canons as to how hrt and top surgery works in BG3/DnD so if anyone wants separate musings on that alone I’d be happy to explain, but for the sake of this incredibly self indulgent fic, Y/N Tav has top surgery scars and equivalent effects of hrt for trans masc ppl. It was originally supposed to be explicit but I decided I'd test the waters with this and maybe I'll write a part two? Let me know if you're interested in that :p

The camp was particularly lively tonight. Your allies were in high spirits, cheering and passing around bottles of liquor to celebrate their recent victory over Ketheic Thorm and the necromancer god Myrkul. The triumphant atmosphere engulfed the camp, making the impending threat to all of Faerûn feel momentarily distant. Even Lae'zel, who usually found such celebrations frivolous, had a hint of a smile as she sipped her wine.

You leaned back, savoring the moment, and watched your companions enjoy the respite. Tomorrow's problems could wait. But amidst the music and boisterous laughter, you noticed one person was missing—Gale. Your brow furrowed as you wondered where he might have gone. Perhaps he was engrossed in his Weave studies, as he often was.

As you set your goblet down, a different kind of warmth filled you. It was the memory of the tender moments shared under the starry sky, where your lips met his in a passionate kiss, and the world faded into a magical embrace by his design.Your neck prickled with excitement as you thought of the night Gale had shown you the power of the Weave, of the profound connection it created, of the sheer ecstasy you both gave into.

With a longing that mirrored the enchantment of that night, you decided to chase after Gale, eager to see how he was faring on this unusual journey, hoping he might reveal more about the Weave's mysteries, and yearning for the chance to share another intimate moment beneath the infinite tapestry of the cosmos. Perhaps this time, he would be interested in a more physical, grounded pleasure. 

He wasn't far from the camp, just a short distance behind you. You could still make out the faint light of the campfire through the trees, and the occasional burst of laughter echoed in the night. Gale stood there, his back turned toward you, once again immersed in the intricate dance of the Weave. It was nothing as grandiose as the last time, but you did notice something akin to a small-scale meteor shower, as if the very stars were converging at his fingertips. Perhaps this time, he wasn't seeking to impress anyone.

Watching him manipulate the golden threads of magic was like witnessing an artist meticulously craft a masterpiece. Each movement was deliberate, and every detail was attended to with the utmost care. You stood back, admiring him for a brief moment, the soft radiance of the Weave illuminating his face, making him appear more ethereal than ever.

"Are you indulging in a bit of quiet observation?” Gale's voice, gentle yet playful, broke the silence. His focus remained on the Weave.

Your face flushed, embarrassed that you had been caught. "I was worried when I couldn't find you at camp," you admitted, stepping out of the shadows. "I assumed you'd taken a brief respite nearby."

"No need to worry, my intentions were far from dramatic," he replied, waving a hand to dismiss the Weave's projection as he turned to face you. "I simply needed a moment to gather my thoughts, that's all. Would you care to join me?"

"I didn't mean to interrupt anything," you said, approaching him hesitantly. "If you'll have me, I wouldn't mind taking a break from the noise."

"Please," he said with an inviting smile, almost eager, as he motioned for you to sit beside him. He gracefully lowered himself to the ground.

You settled beside him, relishing the chance for a quiet moment alone with Gale. As much as you enjoyed the bustling camp, it could at times feel overwhelming. These solitary moments with the Wizard of Waterdeep were truly treasured, and you were grateful for the opportunity to savor his company in peaceful seclusion.

"I've brought a bottle of wine," you remarked, reaching for your bag with a playful smile. "Unfortunately, there are no glasses, so we'll have to share straight from the bottle." The wine had already left you feeling a bit tipsy after sharing a bottle with the others, so you extended it to him, gesturing for him to take the first sip.

"Of course," he replied, reaching out to accept the bottle from your hand as you presented it to him. He took a long, leisurely sip, savoring the flavor for a moment before glancing at the label. "Ah, you managed to sneak a bottle of that exquisite find from earlier, didn't you?"

"Don't breathe a word of it to the others," you giggled, taking the bottle back and sipping from it yourself. "I wanted to share it with you. We don't get many moments to ourselves, after all."

"I suppose not," he agreed, his eyes softening as he gazed at you, as if he were savoring the sight of you. You felt a warmth rush to your cheeks.

As time passed, the two of you exchanged stories about your lives before the parasite, all while indulging in the bottle of wine. Laughter filled the air between you. Eventually, the topic of past lovers arose.

"So," you began, your words slightly slurred from the wine's effects, "Mystra. Did you engage in that astral projection thing often with her?"

Gale paused for a moment, considering your question. "Yes, I would say so," he replied. "Physical intimacy was... a concern for mortals, you see. Why indulge in such earthly pursuits when we could connect on a more divine level?" Despite the considerable amount of wine he had consumed, his speech remained clear.

"Have you been with mortals?" you asked, your curiosity tinged with a touch of self-consciousness.

"A few, here and there," Gale confessed. "But nothing I'd describe as serious, at least not until Mystra."

"Men?"

"Excuse me?"

"Mortal men," you repeated, your words escaping in a hushed, almost embarrassed tone. You felt a flush of self-consciousness, unsure of how he'd respond.

Gale noticed your sudden shyness and extended his hand, gently resting it on yours as a reassuring gesture. "You're not the first man I've been with," he admitted with a soft smile, "certainly the first to experience the Weave so intimately. The first mortal, in truth."

You appreciated the intimate gesture of his hand atop yours, his touch conveying more than words ever could. But there was another question that had been nagging at you, a curiosity you couldn't shake. You considered whether it was worth asking, knowing that the subject matter was intimate and personal.

The night he had shown you how the gods indulged in pleasure had been unexpected. Normal intimacy wasn't something that typically occurred without a series of conversations and deepening emotional connections. Curiosity, however, had taken hold of you. You didn't regret the experience; in fact, it had left you with a sense of wonder and contentment. Yet, it was undoubtedly a rare occurrence, a spontaneous act that you didn't engage in frequently, if at all.

Then again, you had never experienced intimacy through astral projection before. It had been a unique and exhilarating encounter, one that required little preparation as your clothes had remained on your person.

"Mortal men of the... Trans variety." The words felt almost silly, and the wine, you decided, was the culprit.

"Trans... variety? What do you mean?" Gale furrowed his brow, his expression showing genuine confusion. You kept your gaze on the empty bottle, head swirling with wine and nervousness. He appeared ready to inquire further when realization slowly crept in. "Oh, oh, I see. I didn't, well, it never occurred to me, really. I've never, um, encountered a mortal man of the trans variety, not physically. It's not because I'd find it undesirable, you understand, but rather, it's just... well, it simply hasn't happened. Or maybe I've never met someone who chose to, you know, disclose that aspect. But I want to assure you, it doesn't matter to me in the least." Gale's words tumbled out in a jumble, and his usually precise articulation was marred by a palpable nervousness that you assumed, was induced by the wine.

A moment of silence fell between the two of you, and your stomach stirred with a peculiar blend of uncertainty and wine-induced unease. It wasn't that Gale's response had been unfavorable, but the awkwardness of the moment was palpable. In your attempt to seek answers, you had ventured into uncharted territory and made things awkward. Awkwardness clung to the air like an unwanted guest.

Gale was the first to break the silence, his voice hesitant. "So then, the scars on your chest..."

You let out a light, nervous laugh. "Definitely not from an owlbear fight," you assured him, and a genuine smile began to replace the awkward tension. "They're the handiwork of a wizard doctor in Baldur's Gate. But, honestly, I find it much more entertaining to share absurd stories about them."

"Amusing, indeed," Gale agreed, and he joined in your laughter. The tension began to dissipate, leaving you both with a sense of relief. It was as if a heavy weight had been lifted, and the atmosphere lightened.

"I'm sorry for springing that on you; it's been weighing on my mind for some time," you admitted as the laughter between you two gradually quieted down.

"Please, don't worry about it," Gale reassured you, his voice sincere and understanding. He reached out and clasped your hand securely. "I can only imagine it's a sensitive topic, and I'm glad you felt safe enough to confide in me. I want to emphasize that this revelation changes absolutely nothing about how I feel about you." His words were imbued with warmth and reassurance.

You couldn't be certain if it was the wine or just the intimate conversation, but a subtle heat spread across your face, your cheeks warming as you found yourself ensnared by his rich brown eyes. He met your gaze with an intensity that seemed to reflect your own unspoken desires. For a moment, you both shared a meaningful silence, savoring the reassuring presence of one another.

In this quiet interlude, you allowed your gaze to leisurely explore his face, tracing his features with your eyes. You followed the gentle curve of his silhouette, his magnetic eyes, and then down to the sculpted line of his jaw. Your attention settled on his lips, vividly recalling how they felt – soft and inviting, his beard lightly brushing against your skin, eliciting those delightful, ticklish sensations. Astral projection had its allure, but it couldn't quite replicate the tangible experience of another person's touch.

As your thoughts wandered, you couldn't help but ponder when Gale had last engaged in a physical, intimate encounter. The way he spoke of his solitude after Mystra suggested it had been a long while. Would he ever consider exploring such connections again? You wondered if it would be too audacious or imprudent to even pose the question.

Your reverie was abruptly interrupted by the tender sensation of a warm hand gently cupping your cheek. It cradled you, offering an assurance of safety and comfort. In response, your heart seemed to flutter in your chest as Gale drew you nearer to him. His gaze was filled with affection as he lovingly looked into your eyes, and all you could hear in that intimate moment was the soft rhythm of his breath.

"You look quite magnificent tonight," he whispered, his voice so hushed as if he feared disrupting the tranquil serenity that enveloped both of you.

A playful smile graced your lips, and you replied with a hint of cheekiness, "You spoil me with your words, Gale." Leaning in, you bridged the distance between your lips and his, planting a gentle kiss upon his mouth. The kiss was a wordless expression of your connection, and it spoke volumes of the unspoken emotions shared between you.

Gale held you close, his arms wrapped around you as he reciprocated the kiss with tenderness. You felt a bit lightheaded, the wine and the joy of the moment mingling in your senses as you lost yourself in the warmth of his embrace. His lips carried the faint taste of wine, much like yours. Almost instinctively, your hands found their place behind his neck, drawing him into the kiss, a silent longing for his touch.

He smiled softly against your lips, then pulled away slightly to let out a gentle chuckle.

"Is this the real reason you sought me out tonight?" Gale playfully inquired, his voice laced with a teasing undertone that sent a playful spark into the air. He punctuated the question with another tender kiss on your lips, his lips lingering for a moment before he gently nuzzled his face against your neck. His warm breath washed over your skin, causing a delightful shiver to dance down your spine, and you couldn't help but respond by softly biting your lip, ensuring no unintended sounds could escape, all the while relishing the intimate connection between you two.

"My intention was simply to share a moment with you; anything more is a delightful surprise," you replied, your fingers finding their way through his luscious, wavy brown locks as you spoke.

"Shall we dance like the gods, then?" Gale whispered sweetly into your ear, his hands trailing down your back with a tender, alluring touch. His hands traced a path down your back, and the touch was like a soft breeze on a summer's night, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. The moonlight cast a silvery glow around you, and the distant murmur of the camp seemed to fade into the background as you were drawn into this intimate moment.

Your heart quickened, and your thoughts swirled in a whirlwind of desire and curiosity. As his hands continued their tender exploration, you found your own fingers lightly grazing the nape of his neck, pulling him closer. The world around you faded, and all that remained was the connection between your bodies, an electric current that left you breathless and eager for what lay ahead. You pondered the question for a moment, wondering if the magic weave sex was something you were interested in pursuing again.

"Actually..." you began carefully, pulling away slightly to meet Gale's gaze, your eyes filled with a mix of anticipation and shyness. "I'd like to experience you as you are."

Gale paused, a look of slight astonishment flickering across his features, as though he needed a moment to process your words. "As I am?" he repeated slowly, seeking confirmation.

"If you'll have me, that is, as I am," you replied with a shy smile, your voice a delicate whisper. "I've been wondering if perhaps you'd like to explore more about... men of my variety."

A soft, thoughtful expression crossed Gale's face. He leaned in, his forehead gently touching yours, and your noses brushed in a tender nuzzle. "If that is your desire, I would be more than willing to oblige," he murmured, his voice soft and filled with warmth. "You've certainly piqued my curiosity, and I'm always eager for new learning experiences." 

Both of your lips met in another affectionate kiss, and as the night continued to unfold, it felt as though the rest of the world had dissolved, leaving you and Gale entwined in a lover's embrace.

trans as in transformation, trans as in transcendence

✨

Drawing myself is one of the most powerful tools I have to affirm myself, and as the year comes to a close I’m thinking a lot about this ongoing Journey™ through both art and identity. I started this tumblr just over a year ago, simply to have a designated place to collect all my sketches and rambles, and now I’m coming up on 2 big transition milestones: my 1 year HRT-iversary and my pre-op consult for top surgery 🎉 (Oh also I just submitted my application for cartooning school, because I fucking love this and want to do it for the rest of my one wild and precious life, tysm) 

What I did not expect when I started dumping my brain out here on tumblr dot com was the sheer number of people who would come across my journal comics -- intensely introspective, often idiosyncratic, a little goofy -- and see so much of themselves and their stories reflected in mine. Thousands of you! Like literally thousands! (You’re not as alone in your Weird Gender Feelings as it sometimes seems, I promise ♥) For every single person who has reblogged my comics, left a kind comment, sent me a message to say “me too” -- thank you. I see you, and I am so very proud of you. What an honor it is to share this broken, breathing, beautiful world with you. I’m glad you’re here, and I’m glad you’re you. 💖

I am so wildly grateful for where I am, what I’ve survived, and where I’m headed. Come along with me. Tell me your story. I’m listening ♥

(I'm sorry this got so long. you don't have to post it if you don't want to) late to the party but I did want to say that while I don't know what the perfect answer is, I also don't like it when trans kids are written off as being dumb (or kids in general). Even at a pretty young age its not impossible to understand complex ideas, even if you can't explain them in the most clear way. As early as 5 my mom noticed I would talk about my gender in certain ways, saying I'd wish i was a boy and other things along those lines. For a while she chalked it up to me possibly being a tom-boy but after I started to transition it really clicked with her that I knew I was trans from a really young age. I'm not sure she would have gotten me onto HRT if she knew I was trans sooner, but I feel like if we were more open to trans healthcare for kids we can at least get that conversation started sooner, yknow? Sure at certain ages kids can't understand EVERYTHING but that's why we teach kids things. As a trans kid it kind of felt like I had to find all of the information myself which kind of sucked. Not all the information i was able to find was good information. Around that time non-binary was a known thing but not as wide spread and accepted as it is now, so the idea of sitting outside of certain molds was super new for trans and non-trans people alike. So a lot of the information being spread even within trans circles was a bit weird. Like,the idea of a masc person not wanting top surgery or being fine not binding was seen as a bad thing at the time and it would confuse trans and cis people. It made trying to figure out if i'm trans or not hard because on one side i knew for a fact i wanted to be masc presenting, and on the other hand a large portion of internet randos are saying that some of the ways I felt made me "not trans enough". As a young teen I knew what gender was, what gender dysphoria was, and it would have been great for someone that knew MORE than I did to explain the right information to me. I wasn't dumb, I just didn't know better. And I think the same can be said for a lot of trans kids and parents of trans kids that want to learn more about hormones, and being trans in general. Withholding that information from parents and kids did do harm and still does harm. I do understand the worry with regret. Hormones do in fact have some life changing effects. But at the same time I feel like we can do a LOT better in terms of giving trans kids resources. I don't know enough to know if changing the age when hormones can start is a good or bad idea, but treating kids as kids that are able living people helps a lot. At the very least kids deserve to be informed. Something kid-me WOULD have loved a lot was getting to sit with a doctor that knew a lot about being trans and have them offer me things I could do even before hormones. Play around with pronouns, names, think about how I want to express myself, maybe doctors would have known about non-binary genders at the time too, i'm not sure. And maybe they could have information I could sit and think about, like giving me sheets about the good and bad changes of HRT, and even how to deal with transphobia and gender dysphoria while those problems exist. but yeah- i know this isn't strictly related to hormones but this is my two cents. the TLDR is that trans kids aren't quite as ignorant about gender as people think they are, its just hard to put those feelings into direct words sometimes. If a 13 year old can learn multiple subjects a day at school, teaching them about gender expression and medical options for gender dysphoria isn't that hard.

Posting because it's good info and an important perspective.

TRANSMASC! NAT x TRANSFEMME! LOTTIE HCS

(sorry anon, accidentally deleted your ask </3)

*noted this is written from a tboy perspective but i will do my girlie lot justice! *the nsfw portion will be tagged at the end as a pwp transmac x transfemme lottienat AO3 fic :>

SFW HCS

absolute favorite has to be nat, even after four+ months on T, being such a baby about shots and asking lottie to do them for him (which she obviously says yes to every time)

lot in solidarity offers to let nat do hers, instructs him carefully, and then soon they're just doing each others HRT shots and cuddling afterwards in the ensuing gender euphoria of it all

lot's HRT won't give her a cycle and it'll make her dysphoric while she's also dealing with all the hormones still occurring, nat would be the doting bf affirming her in the ways he can the whole time - "baby, you're so pretty. such a pretty girl." and doing all the things you'd normally do - making sure she eats well, giving her extra attention, chocolates, kisses all over her face to show how loved she is, and checking in on her frequently in case she needs extra love and attention

nat gets top surgery while they're dating and lot takes care of him the whole time, reassures him even when he feels a little silly for whining about any pain or having to wear the bandages and gives him loads of kisses and compliments when he finally takes the binder off, mindful of the fact she still has to be careful but obsessed with touching his now-flat chest especially since he's so happy about it.

whenever nat is feeling dysphoric lottie will tell him how handsome he is while playing with his hair/running her fingers along his top surgery scars/playing with the happy trail on his stomach until all he can do is laugh and pull her in for kisses

nat gets to over 8 months on T and his voice has fully deepened, lot's voice has gotten higher on E and they're both like - somehow even more attracted to each other than they were before dksjks. phone calls even though they just left each other's apartments just to hear each other's voices, nat sending husky voice notes in the morning because he knows they drive lottie crazyyyy. lot's voice being so cute to nat that sometimes conversations are like - "babe, i literally just explained this to you." and nat's like, "i know. can you say it again though? i just love hearing you talk."

nat's HRT giving him that *slutty* male waist and allowing him to bulk a bit, lot literally can't keep her hands off him or stop bragging about how handsome "my man" is or using every possible moment to say "my guy" or "my boyfriend" (nat is even worse about calling lot "my girl", making it extremely clear to all his dudebros that lot is HIS,, but we won't get into it, possessive nat is for another time)

likewise lottie's HRT making her gain weight in her hips and chest and nat being like, insanely obsessed with this. could not keep his hands off of her if he tried and even then lot wouldn't want him to, grinning every time nat squeezes at the plush of her waist or kisses her stomach, telling her she's "so perfect, so beautiful. how'd i get so lucky?"

literally the most wholesome relationship ever, like they go clothes shopping together and tell each other which outfits look so pretty or so handsome

the height difference doesn't even bother nat because having a tall gf just means her skirts show even MORE of her legs (he has an obsession there as well) and when they cuddle he can just starfish on top of her while she plays with his hair and gives him little affirmations

probably could go on and on but i hope you enjoyed :,)

NSFW TRANSMASC! NAT X TRANSFEMME! LOTTIE A03 FIC LINK:

this was written on anon so i'm kind of defeating the purpose by posting it but only a few of you have my tumblr soooo

My Ripp Grunt headcanons

It was about time I put them all in one place because as you can tell I’m obsessed with him and have a lot😭 Some of them might make no sense whatsoever or sound weird or are probably me just projecting but who cares lol. If I forget any or think of more I’ll add them later. Also it’s going to be really long…

Anyway… “So Kai, how much do you like Ripp???”

Me:

Birthday

I have come up with a birthday for Ripp. December 13, 1988. (Yes I know December 13 is the same date as Taylor Swift lol.) He is a Sagittarius (that’s canon but that’s why I picked that birthday). I see sims 2 Strangetown as starting in 2005 and he was age 16-17 back then. He’s a year and several months younger than Tank and 4 years older than Buck.

Height

Kind of short for a guy, about 5.5. Tank and Johnny are significantly taller and he hates it.

Identity

He is bisexual and transmasculine. Maybe non binary too, specifically a non binary man (like a demiboy or something.)

Ripp has always been attracted to all genders. He doesn’t really care about that (can fit pansexual too.) He is open to seeing multiple people at once so is polyamorous too. Which can be one way of explaining the romance aspiration. And yes, he has a crush on both Ophelia and Johnny.

He is transgender and knew something was up from an early age. Like a lot of transmasc people he went down the “tomboy” to trans pipeline. He didn’t fully realise what being trans meant and that that was what he was until he was about 14 though. Ripp chose his name himself, idc. He thought it was cool.

Johnny and Ophelia were very supportive of him being trans. He had them at school when the bullies found something new to pick on. As was his mum Lyla who he is very close to. Buck didn’t fully understand at first because of being really young but is still very supportive. (Also Buck ended up becoming Rebecca and is transfem herself but that’s another character headcanon lol) Lyla helped him start HRT.

General Buzz though… I don’t see General Buzz as entirely transphobic. I think he’s the kind of person to prefer having sons, but is still weird about Ripp being trans. He is kind of against it at first but gets used to it. He would also want Ripp to be a man in the “right” way (based on a Tumblr post I saw.) He messes up pronouns sometimes but at least tries. He still thinks Ripp is a fucking lazy ass disappointment overall though 😭 “yeah you are trans or bi, whatever, but you are still my worst son ever.” I think he would be more concerned if any guy Ripp dated was an alien over the fact they were a guy (oops, he already has a crush on Johnny Smith.) General Buzz’s conflicting views about Ripp with Lyla also contributed to those two’s strained relationship. He sees a lot of Lyla in Ripp, in both appearance and personality and he hates being reminded of her.

Tank was in a similar position of getting used to it over time. Didn’t mean he stopped wanting to beat his ass all the time though. He had some internalised stuff he had to deal with himself though (being his own person with his own wishes and also, gay.)

Ripp took Lyla disappearing very hard, especially since she was the one helping with his transition. He was on his own. Things got complicated because General Buzz was still kind of unsupportive. Ripp snuck out for several days to get top surgery by himself and General Buzz was very angry about that.

Personality

He’s a very sweet person overall. He’s friendly with almost everyone and hates conflict, but if he is confronted he loves taking the piss out of them. He’s very positive most of the time despite his terrible life. Very talkative and can go on and on. Tries to make a joke and lighten the mood with just about everything, including himself, even if he does go too far sometimes (which he instantly feels bad about if he makes someone sad.) Definitely swears a lot which his father hates, but he loves annoying his father.

Relationships

I don’t think he has a bad relationship with his father and Tank forever. They make up at one point and maybe they don’t become really close but they at least get along somewhat again (no horrible PSP ending in my sims game.)

He was very close with Lyla, probably the most out of all three of Lyla’s sons so he was devastated when she left, and even more so when he found out she died. One of the few supportive people in his life and she was gone.

Him and Buck (or Rebecca later) are very close due to them both having a strained relationship with General Buzz. Rebecca looks up to Ripp a lot. Also they end up both being transgender which they make a joke out of later. “I can’t believe we’re both Grunts and trans.)

He’s been friends with Ophelia and Johnny since middle school. He hangs out with them a lot and prefers being with them to being at home. He loves being an idiot with Johnny but is sweet with Ophelia. He fell in love with Ophelia first then Johnny.

He met Lilith after she also ran away from home. The two became close because of that. They love poking fun at each other. He’s afraid Lilith will make fun of him if he tells her he likes her (but Lilith likes him too.)

Self insert time, he’s really sweet around Lana. Ripp talks a lot and Lana barely talks at all due to their extreme shyness but he doesn’t mind. He cares for them a lot. He is the most calm and gentle to them and loves listening to them ramble about their interests. He might want to marry her.

Music Career

Ripp was always interested in music, mostly rock music but he is open to other genres as well. I see him as being very into Nirvana. He started playing guitar at school with Johnny Smith, covering their favourite songs. Lyla got him own guitar, and he also started writing his own songs, uploading them to MySpace or something.

At one point he runs away from home and gets a trailer for himself. Away from his father, he has a lot more freedom to do what he wants with his life. He’s still working at the gas station and going to a lot of music labels and he eventually gets signed to one. He has his first major song released through them.

Ripp is the lead singer and guitarist in a band as well as a soloist, with Johnny Smith, Lilith Pleasant and Mercutio Monty, the last two he meets and befriends at one point. (Idk what to name this band yet lol.) Johnny also plays guitar, Lilith is the bassist and Mercutio plays the drums.

His music style is very diverse. And I’m also going to base them off Lana Del Rey albums and songs because why not. His very early work is very acoustic. The first ep and debut album he releases has influences of grunge, surf rock and psychedelic rock. A lot of guitar sounds. And whatever sounds come out of AKA Lizzy Grant.

He goes through some tough things in life which is why he takes a break between his debut and his second album. The sound of this album is quite different. Still guitar heavy but also very slowed, dark and psychedelic. Probably some of his most depressing songs ever. Definitely has a song calling out General Buzz. His Ultraviolence era. It’s a little bit of a concept album too, there’s some sort of storyline throughout. He wears black eyeliner on stage.

The next album is experimental, a little bit of the style of his first album back with the guitar but also some trap beats in there. If I could describe it in a Lana Del Rey song it would be Freak Like Me Demo. Also the most horny album. Bisexual anthem in there though.

The latest album I’ve imagined for Ripp (idk why I’ve imagined all these albums for a sims 2 premade, please help) he explores pop. Lust for Life era (I’m still drawing that, I have a vision.) It’s a lot more uplifting than his previous work and it changes the world. Also somewhat of a horny album too. He dies the ends of his hair purple.

Ripp moves to Del Sol Valley at one point when he becomes a celebrity and gets a house in the pinnacles.

He is definitely very popular in terms of being attractive. There are people making thirst TikToks of him and writing self insert fanfiction and everything. (Couldn’t be me. /s) Some fans are really obsessed with him. To the point they would leak his unreleased music and post it everywhere which is unfortunate but some of them are so good (I’m writing a fic based on this.)

He also does campaigns and advertisements and things as part of being a celebrity, there’s a billboard or magazine cover somewhere where he’s modelling underwear 🙏 And he also hopes it annoys his dad if he sees it and recognises his face lol

His social medias would be hilarious and he would also own terrible people.

Other random hcs

I think Ripp was an unplanned child. Lyla was happy to have him but General Buzz not so much, he kind of hated Ripp from day 1.

He was a “problem child” at least in General Buzz’s eyes and also the schools he went to where he had behaviour issues and struggled to focus. His dad made him see a psychologist. He’s autistic (or aspergers back in the late 90s-early 2000s, also I don’t think General Buzz is the most up to date) and has ADHD. I don’t think this helped with General Buzz already seeing him as a disappointment. Ripp gets really fixated on music (both certain artists and creating it) or certain tv shows or very unconventional things that are kind of uncomfortable for some people. Like literally just the subject of woohoo interests him and he wants to know everything about it lol. I think he fixates on philosophical stuff too like death and the purpose of life (another thing that can lead to some uncomfortable conversations.) Very unlike the stereotype of autism because he’s really outgoing and social too, but it is a spectrum.

I think he shows a lot of affection through touch.

Really dark hc but… 😭 Although he pretends it doesn’t, I think the terrible relationship he has with General Buzz and Tank, as well as Lyla disappearing and dying did really affect him. Has depression and some self esteem and emotional issues and fears abandonment. He has considered *unaliving* before. Also a weird relationship with food. Although he has max interest in food, and he eats a lot of food (but mostly junk food) he grew up with the pressure to remain thin. The dark period of his life between his first two albums involved that and he may have abused substances too. I’m a terrible person, I’m sorry 😭. The romance sim part of him might have spawned from craving the love he didn’t get at home. He feels undeserving of a real relationship but deep down that’s what he actually wants.

I am sorry to him for giving him all these traumatising hcs but I can’t help myself. He was bullied in his school years 🥲 The psp secret of him being afraid of toilets from “one too many swirlies as a child” is to do with this. Tank was involved too maybe, but I don’t believe it was all down to him and he’s a terrible person. With the trans headcanon, I think he was picked on by both boys and girls. Girls didn’t like him for being “weird” and boys would go out of their way to hurt him for trying to fit in with them.

Due to General Buzz being in the millitary, he travelled to a lot of places and moved around a lot prior to going back to middle school in Strangetown. I think he would become interested in different cultures and pick up some words of different languages. He lived in Tomerang at one point.

Ripp is kind of feminine. He isn’t afraid to like “feminine” things and he loves jewellery and painting his nails.

He has a brow piercing and a septum.

He gets a sleeve tattoo.

Has rarely ever cut his hair in his life, he lets it grow really long and he doesn’t care. He would hate for all of his hair to just be chopped off (and that’s also what his father wants)

Smokes, both cigarettes and weed. Tries to stop smoking the cigarettes later on though. Him, Johnny and Ophelia get stoned together and sometimes Lana if she’s willing.

He’s quite arty (his canonical one true hobby is set to arts and crafts.) Spends a lot of his time drawing anything from animals to horny “anatomy” pictures because why not. He takes art when he attends college.

Ripp is a great father. Idc about that romance aspiration, just because he has that doesn’t mean he’s a deadbeat father 😭 Like I’ve said before, that sounds like Don Lothario but not Ripp. His nice points are too high for that. Also being like his own dad would be the last thing he wants to be. He really cares for any kids he has, and the people pregnant with the kids. He would be a really fun dad, maybe a little permissive. Basically the opposite of General Buzz (and also how I think Lyla was.) He also cares for people in general instead of just wanting woohoo out of them.

Ripp is left handed. Sims 4 actually set him up as left handed for me lol. Left handed guitars are unavailable to him to start with so he’s forced to learn right handed 😰 But later on he gets a left handed guitar and plays amazing.

He has a tooth gap.

Cat person. General Buzz, Tank and Rebecca are all drawn to dogs but Ripp is the only cat lover 😭 He gets a havana or a maine coon (or both.)

I think Ripp fits the pleasure aspiration more than the romance aspiration to be honest. An aspiration that involves some romance but also not being a total sleaze and wanting to relax and have fun sounds more like him. It fits Lyla too (another reason why they were so close is that they had very similar personalities.) Another aspiration that fits is popularity, he’s just a very friendly person who loves making friends.

Songs that remind me of Ripp:

one of the most infuriating things that happens in discussions about trans people is like, when a transphobe talks about how its just SOOOO easy to access gender affirming care, it's so easy to get on hrt or get referred for surgery etc... some of you dense motherfuckers respond to this by saying "no!!! it's not easy!!!! its so hard!!!" & listen. i KNOW that it IS HARD for many of us. and in many places it's getting harder. but tell me this: isn't the goal, eventually, to make it easy? not just easier than right now, but genuinely easy for a transgender person to access the care they need on whatever timeline they want, no matter how fast or slow? so if you spend all your time right now combating transphobia by insisting that transition is difficult and taxing and traumatizing, what are you going to do if and when it's none of those things? if there is no endless suffering and million hoops?

when someone says "it's too easy to transition" in order to justify their own transphobia, and you say "no it's not", you're also saying "if it were, your feelings would be justified". which is already kind of a terrible implication without taking into consideration that what most of these people mean by "too easy" is "possible". they mean that you can transition and they don't want you to. point blank. when you say it's difficult, they think "good. it should be harder". it will never be difficult enough to not be easy to them.

i am literally so sick & tired of all of us throwing each other under the bus in order to advocate for a future that is fucking miserable and awful. when someone tells you their nightmare scenario is transgender people being happy, you should not be responding to that by reassuring them that actually, transgender people are miserable and always have been and always will. when someone complains about how easy transition is you should say "good". we are never getting out of this fucking crab bucket if we're not only pulling each other down but also telling other people that pushing us back in would be fine if we were a little closer to the top.

Wesker with trans male reader

based on me, it's very likely your experience or boundaries are different from mine, don't take offense.

in the first place he is either interested by your skills and your workplace performance or their lack of. the two extremes intrigue him, he can't help it.

your appearance comes only second in why he wants to pursue you.

with his god complex he likes that no matter how hard you try you can never equate to his genius. even if you do he just doesn't acknowledge it - after all, one of the main driving force of his uroboros project is his presumed superiority. if you are not the one on the top of the food-chain at your job, that's the most favorable to him. knowing his darling won't even get near his greatness is comforting to him. you won't leave him for someone better, simply because none exists. and surely you need someone to take care of you or at least help.

he doesn't realise people don't have a value ranging from one to ten based on their intelligence, money and power, and how his theoretical hierarchy is nonexistent in everyone else's mind, so you are, in fact, not chained to him forever.

his mind is in dvd screensaver mode most of the time when he is not working, so it is possible he either waved you off when trying ro open up to him about yourself or didn't get any of it.

he will go with any of your fashion choices though. as long as it's proper for the occasion and high-quality clothing, he won't have any negative comments about it. he thinks you are hot in everything and even if he could have had a better outfir in mind for you, he shrugs it off thinking it's a new trend he didn't have time to catch up on.

he would be over the moon if you dressed exactly like him. his little human looks so much up to him that he wants to copy him the best his ability? how cute. he may even want to introduce your body to uroboros. - of course if he deems it safe for you.

if you ask him to recommend you a doctor for hrt or gender reassignment surgery he will be caught off guard. like for what? and you have to explain it to him all over again.

he understands of course. feeling alien from the person your environment taught or at least wanted you to be. but also a forever outcast in society. people just won't take their time and understand. and what they don't, feels strange to them. but don't worry, he will be with you on this road. will ask you if you would like to join him on his throne when his plan is done. of course you can choose to stay the way you are. he will mention, though, the benefits of his creation on healing and regeneration if you choose to have surgeries.

if you can't or don't want to for some reason, he still will see you as a man. he will be more fussy about your safety - for example he will remind you a couple of times to take your binder off and just breathe throughout the day. he also makes sure that you feel as comfortable as you can with him without the binder as well.

he will make your transition smooth and fast. no footlong waiting lists and irresponsible, careless or transphobic doctors. in case, he w i l l ruin the ones who mistreat you. and some others who abuse their power just for the fun of it. they've got the opportunity and smarts to make it through med school and use it for making other's lives miserabble? well then, he just has to dig up some controversy from their past, sue them over it, aaand consider it done.

he immediately switches to your preferred name and feels kind od horrible for seeming untrustworthy for a time, thus forcing you to go by your deadname around him.

he will proudly refer to you as his boyfriend and if you are okay with it he will be open about the fact that you're trans.

any transphonic comment will at least get the person thrown through the room by uroboros. they must have not been the sharpest tool anyway, so not much of a loss if they get hurt or die by it.

from the start of the relationship he would prefer if you just moved in. not because he has ulterior motives, but it's just more convenient and he hasn't got time to commute. he will provide you with a separate room if you don't yet want to sleep with him.

if you for some reason can't go yet, he will be extra attentive when you two meet up. he makes sure you know that he enjoys getting flooded by text messages or pictures from you any time of the day. he is kind of dependent on you so he usually wants to facetalk into the night. that's how you both fall asleep on these occasions.

he is very patient with every step of the relationship. before you come out to him and after especially. he asks before he does something new it it's okay, whether you want to try it or not.

if marriage is important for you he will spare no expenses to arrange one for the two of you. just reminds you he really has noone to invite from his side. (maybe in another universe his s.t.a.r.s. team with chris being his best man. he is not, but funny enough for the role.) although if you want only a small one, even just the two of you with or without a priest/pastor he will be delighted. after all he doesn't have to waste his time on people who he barely even knows. and who may even barely even know you.

he makes sure you don't accidentally consume extra oestrogen with your food and plans meals for you - if you allow him to. his love language is more like gifts and physical touch but you make him want to try new ways to love: making time for you and helping out however he can.

he believes you are the only person worth leaving untouched uroboros. preserving something from the old world, something only you could have. by remaining human, the fragility he was never allowed to posess and the strength to still have it despite the world being disgusting towards you, the courage, which should really be called recklessness, to still be by the side of most powerful being

I need advice or help or just some words of encouragement or analysis from other LGBT people please. 💙💚

Tldr; You have to read to understand because it's complicated

Hi guys! You may or may not know me as the super Rick & Morty / Solar Opposites obsessed fan artist but there's more to me than I let on.

I came here because I trust you guys and I wanna know what you all think. I'm Transgender, I identify as demiboy meaning that I'm half non-binary/Agender and half Trans Masculine. This March I turned 18 years old and my doctor gave me my HRT paperwork to look over and bring in signed when I'm ready. I've talked to my therapist about this for over a year, and I questioned my gender identity since I was 12, when I was 6 I never really thought about gender a lot to be honest I did everything under the sun that girls AND boys had done.

Other things to take into consideration is that I'm also diagnosed:

AuDHD (since 16)

Sever Generalized Anxiety Disorder (since 12)

Gender dysphoria (since 16)

Depressive Disorder (since 12).

I've been really adamant about transition since I realized who I was, around 13, it was a long and painstaking journey; full of loss and gain, disorder and chaos, pain and growth, but I made it through to the other side.

Now that I hold these papers in my hands, I'm scared to go through with it, what if I don't like some of the changes? What if people don't see me as who I am? What if I'm not accepted? What if my bullying gets worse? What if I wake up one day and realize all of this was a mistake and I was wrong? Even though it felt so right. I have a lot of dysphoria but I also don't always hate my body, because a lot of the time I see myself as genderless and it only becomes apparent to me that I'm not genderless when someone points it out and calls me "girly", "sissy", "missy", "ma'am", and the such...

Around trans people I feel like I belong, but sometimes I feel like I'm an imposter, what if my brain came up with all of this as a way to try and find a place to fit in because I fit nowhere? I know I'm Pan-demisexual, when I figured that out I never questioned it again. I feel like I roll with the LGBT people but I just feel so much comfort in the trans community.

I don't think I could live happily as a cis-woman. I hate the labels, I hate the pronouns, and if someone were to strip away my skin and all that was left was a white orb I'd say I was a nonbinary male person. I wish I was born the other way, things would have been so much easier, but at the same time I don't want to be a fully cis male if given the chance. I wish there was an in-between option, a lot of times growing up - I had hoped that I was born intersex; hell, I didn't really even know what intersex was, but I still wished it, I wanted it. I wanted to be the third and most rare option because that is who I felt I was. There's this gut-wrenching feeling that I get when I think about having to sign '• female/Woman' on a piece of paper. Because that isn't who I feel I am. But I also feel that what I am is an immovable and unreachable object that no one will ever be able to conceive or understand, and there's no way that I can reflect my understanding on to them.

I'm not going to go in at a very high dose, I know for sure I want top surgery even if my chest doesn't give me as much dysphoria as it did before my breast reduction, and I want to be happier in my skin. I want a deeper voice, I want the other changes that come with it and the only thing I really worry about is not actually being happy when it's all done and through. Not actually being what I am and looking as I am to others as I feel inside...

Anyways that's enough for spilling my guts, I just needed to talk to someone and I'm completely open with all ears if you guys want to share any input in or share any stories, regards, or advice. Honestly I could use people to talk to right now, I feel kind of alone, I feel like no one will understand me; And I don't know if it's just cuz of my autism, or my anxiety,.or if I'm just stuck in my head rn.

Less an ask for you specifically (unless you can speak to this) and more just using this as a way to try to connect to people.

I'm agender, of course lol, and also trans masc. I've been contemplating top surgery and HRT, but it's felt so strange. I know a lot of people now are starting to use language to say how it's for trans masc folks and not just trans men, but something about it just makes me feel like I have to identify that way to do those things. Like if I'm really agender, why do I care what my body looks like in that way? Doesn't wanting to make myself more masculine mean I'm trying to live into some kind of bs gender norm I don't subscribe to? Yet the thought of going forward with it feels right. But being a man doesn't. Idk, I just wondered if anyone else out there has had a similar experience or feelings that I could talk to. Thanks ❤️

Actually, I'm transmasc agender as well. Just because you feel comfortable presenting masculine doesn't mean you're not agender. Gender presentation is a completely different thing than gender itself. I want to look masculine without being a man. This doesn't mean I'm not agender, it just means I'm more comfortable presenting masculine.

Asking for advice... I've been on testosterone for 4 years and I'm starting to feel like there's no point? Not like, in a hopeless way but because the only changes I've had have been the permanent ones. I've had no fat distribution, not able to build muscle easier, not less tired. I've got my beard and my voice has dropped and I had top surgery and still get misgendered so T doesn't even help me in that way.

I could deal with having periods again, though I do have anxiety about if breasts grow back??

Dunno why I'm sharing, I don't want to ruin the sleepover.

Detransitioning partially has been on my mind, too. I kind of miss being seen as a girl? I miss feeling wanted. Feel free to ignore if the vibe is off!!

Man that sucks I’m sorry.

I def have no interest in taking T, because being read as a girl doesn’t bother me 99.9% of the time.

I am considering top surgery though, and I’ve started the ball rolling on throwing that out to my doctor the other day who made a note of it in my charts so like. Step 1 complete on possible top surgery.

Right now my hair is to my shoulders so I just don’t care that I’m always getting read as a girl. In fact, any time that I’ve been read as a guy has been in a misogynistic way, which kind of puts a damper on things.

That being said: even when cutting my hair and looking more androgynous I’m not going to be read as a guy. Ever.

And you know what? Not being read as trans is actually nice sometimes. It’s safe. I don’t argue my pronouns with people hardly ever. Getting too surgery? Actually becoming more “masculine” (androgynous) is a bit scary! What if I get transphobia aimed towards me irl? What if people don’t find me attractive? What if people get weird around me?

So like. For real I’m not going to stand here and be like “why would you want to detransition??”

I don’t know hardly anything about hormones and HRT, so I don’t know much about the effects outside of what I read on tumblr. Honestly, I know that I’m never going to look like my ideal fully transmasc look. And I don’t want to look masc enough to want to use hormones. Change is scary. Change is even scarier when you don’t get the results you want, or get some unexpected negative side effects.

For periods, I’m on birth control and I take it continuous which means that I only get a period every few months which is great, and in my opinion is a valid option for people (with research).

It’s definitely a personal choice and not anything I can advise you on one way or another. But no one worth your time is going to think any less of you for detransitioning.

I’m not trying to offend, I just come from a very religious community and am curious. You say your transmasc and a lesbian, does that mean you were AFAB but attracted to women so you keep the original lesbian title? Thank you in advance

Not offended at all!

The label lesbian can mean different things for people who claim it, but a commonly accepted definition is “people who aren’t men, attracted to people who aren’t men”, which includes both women and genderqueer/non-binary people.

“Transmasc” and “transfemme” don’t always mean that the person using those labels is a trans man or a trans woman. These labels can fall (and usually do) under the non-binary/genderqueer categories.

So, for me personally, I describe myself as transmasc because Im not a man or a woman, but my gender is masculine, and I had a transitioning experience (cutting hair, changing pronouns, changing wardrobe, planning to get hrt and top surgery to become more androgynous). But again, I’m not a man. And I have no desire to date men. Therefore, I’m a lesbian.

I also want to note that you do not have to be AFAB to be a lesbian. You don’t even have to be transfemme or a trans woman. As the definition goes, if a non-binary//genderqueer AMAB person of any presentation feels like “lesbian” describes their sexuality best, then they’re lesbians. Similarly, plenty of genderqueer/non-binary AFAB people who are attracted to people who aren’t women, regardless of presentation, are gay. A non-binary transfemme person, if that is the label they feel described their attraction, can also be gay (though I don’t think this is very common as I’ve only met transfemme lesbians).

Hope this helped. Feel free to ask more questions.

Followers feel free to add on (but be kind or I’m coming for your kneecaps)

Trans!Leon headcanons

Not enough people talk about trans!Leon in a non-sexual way. It saddens me to see people being so weird and gross about the hc sometimes, so I'm going to add some more regular stuff to the pool ig. This hc makes me so so happy as a trans person myself, and honestly I totally see him being trans regardless of my own identity.

Also if these seem unrealistic for the time period or situation I really don't gaf because there are insane bioweapons that can make tyrants and turn people into huge flesh/eye monsters among other things.

Also CW for transphobia mention/discussion for the Krauser segment of this!

He definitely used to bind using bandages. I could see this happening from a few years before RE2 up to the creation of the DSO after AUPIT. I think he would have switched to using (safe) tape, since it's less visible, you can exercise and shower with it, and you don't have to take it off for several days. so, it's practical for his job; at least a lot more practical than a binder. The tape would also probably be (surprisingly) fairly easy for him to get access to while working for the DSO since, from what I have found from research, if you went to a physical therapist they could give some to you. With the amount of injuries Leon constantly sustains he could probably get a pretty good supply, and I'm sure Hunnigan could help keep it on the dl.

Also, Hunnigan, Claire, Chris, Krauser, the people who had Leon's dossier when they kidnapped him and Sherry definitely know. It's impossible for the people running the DSO not to know, since they keep close tabs on Leon. I like to think he chose to tell Chris, Claire, and Hunnigan because he is close to them.

While, realistically, it would probably be kind of hard for him to get top surgery because of how often he's out in missions, I think he probably got some downtime, again thanks to Hunnigan, and did it. I'm not sure of the logistics of him doing this without the DSO knowing because of the recovery period, but maybe he did it under the guise of a major injury. This would be some time between RE4 and RE6, but I'm not exactly sure how long before RE6 and after RE4 it would be.

Krauser's pretty boy comments are, in the first place, likely homophobic. At that time period it was much more common place to hear it be used against feminine men/men who people suspected of being gay, and I think Krauser also probably used it in a sort of transphobic way as well. Something along the lines of how cis men today use the term femboy against trans people. I still think Krauser had some, at the very least, sexual feelings for Leon, but you can be homophobic and gay yk.

He takes shots because it's the most practical for him. Though it's not super practical, he would definitely be on HRT at some point (be it before RE2 or some time after. I like to think before but it wasn't very accessible then.)

Chris is definitely on Leon's ass about taking care of himself after (and before too but definitely after) Vendetta, and this definitely comes into play with helping remind him that he isn't any less of a man, helping him through his dysphoria, etc. the man wants his boyfriend to be safe, healthy, and happy.

Thinking about Trans Din today. Any thoughts?

YOU KNOW WHAT!?!? I've been thinking about him a lot lately!! Specifically about what his transition would've been like in The Mandalorian culture/with star wars medicine!!! But I'll let him tell you a bit about it himself :) (aka your first kiss)

Pairing: Trans!Din x GN!Reader, no Y/N

Word Count: 1.2K+

Warnings: Discussions of medical transition (HRT, top surgery), coming out, brief mention of body dysmorphia, (nothing graphic or overly descriptive!!! All happy endings here!!! <3)

A/N: I wrote this in 2 hours as 2am hehehehe I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense I love trans!Din Series Masterlist here!!

The twin suns of Tatooine had long sank below the sand dunes. Their warmth out of reach. The desert cooled greatly under the dark sky. The only given light that of the distant stars, and the fire Din had built for you two. Din sat next to you, his shoulders and thigh touching yours. His cape covers over both your shoulders. Everything was quiet. The fire crackles in a hushed tone. The winds of Tatooine only give half hearted hollow howls. It felt as if the world was waiting for something.

"Cyar'ika?" Din breaks the silence. His dark visor still fixed on the vast sky. "Can I kiss you?"

You turn to him in silence, taking in the silhouette of his helmet. "You want to kiss me?" You repeat to him, unbelieving you've heard him correctly.

You two hadn't had much physical contact. Even after, you admitted your feelings for each other. He was still a Mandalorian after all. Even more, he has spent so much time under his protective armor, Din had forgotten how touch was supposed to feel. Let alone how he was meant to initiate it. But each time he did, stars was it breathtaking.

The first time he let you hold his bare hand you just about fainted. He was so warm and soft. With pretty tanned brown skin. Every touch of his was electrifying. Each time felt like such a gift. A little piece of him you got to have. A piece no one else had gotten. Maybe it was the cloak of night, or the empty desert sand, or being so close to you…but he was filled with an unwonted kind of bravery.

"Yes." He answers bluntly. Letting his answer dangle in the air. The visor slowly turns to reach your gaze. "Do you not want to kiss me?"

"No! No I-I want to kiss you…" a hit of embarrassment runs through you, heat spreading over your face at the admittance. "But your helmet-"

"Can you close your eyes for me?" He asks. A small waver in his voice.

He was nervous. Stars was he nervous… With every step he took he was overly consumed with self consciousness. Never sure what you'd think of him. Of his body. Never wanting to seem even half as eager as he truly was to touch you, to be touched by you. You were so perfect. He just wanted to live up to everything you deserved.

You nod, closing your eyes at his request.

"I'm going to lift my helmet up now." He explains. "I'll tell you when to open your eyes again. Okay?"

"Okay." You answer him with a nervous gulp. You were finally gonna kiss your Mandalorian. A low hiss echoes from Din, letting you know his helmet must be coming off. You hear a small inhale. Unmodulated. Unfiltered. You hear Din's real voice.

"Cyar'ika…"

He slowly pulls the helmet off his head, baring his face for you. Din hadn't thought it possible, but you're even more lovely without the crude filter of his helmet. Even in the poor lighting of the fire, you are radiant. He brings a gloved hand to your cheek. The orange tip of his finger softly traces over your bottom lip.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yes." You answer, leaning into his hand.

Din gently guides you closer to him. He leans into you, tilting his head opposite yours. It feels like an eternity before your lips finally meet.

He kisses you gently, lips barely touching yours. His lips are soft against yours, just a bit rough no doubt from the dry desert air. Your mind is empty. Everything is him. Din kisses you again, this time with an insistent urgency. His lips press firmly against yours, desperate to taste you needing to feel you.

He's so close to you. A bump nudges against your cheeks. His nose. Short prickly hair rubs against your upper lip and cheek. Stubble! He has stubble. A small chuckle rises up your throat at this new knowledge. You feel Din's lips turn up into a smile as he slowly pulls away from you. His hand moving off your cheek.

"What are you laughing at?" He feigns offense.

"You…you have stubble." You say with a laugh. "I- I didn't know you had stubble." You say bashfully.

Din huffs a laugh at you. He enjoys watching you laugh. The sight without his helmet on is even better. "Yes, I have stubble." He blushes at your reaction to him "Is that okay?"

"More than okay I just…I didn't know you could. It's exciting."

"You didn't know?" Din repeats curiously.

"Well it…you must take something…right?"

Din just chuckles at you. "You can ask, Cyar'ika." He affirms, dropping his helmet back over his face. "Open your eyes."

You open your eyes slowly, readjusting to the light. Din's visor locked on you. You give him a soft smile. "Hi." You say shyly.

"Hello." He says back. "You want to ask how I can grow facial hair, right?"

You nod. You'd been curious ever since he told you, if he'd transitioned medically. If that was something he even wanted. But you didn't want to intrude on something so personal. Especially when it was something he'd not often discussed. But you wondered.

"I use patches that give me more testosterone. They give me more- masculine features."

"Like a batcha patch?"

"Yes. Exactly."

"Where do you put them?"

"On the thighs is best."

"Oh I see. How long have you been wearing them?"

"Everyday since I was 18. The Mandalorians were very familiar with it. I'm not the first of my kind among my clan."

"Din if I may…have you done anything else?"

He nods. "Just one. In my 20's I had surgery on my chest to remove some…excess tissue. That's all."

"The Mandalorians…they did alot to care for you, huh?"

"This is the way."

"Was it hard for you to tell them?" You tilt your head in curiosity.

"Hmm," Din thinks back to his early teens. In a way he'd always known. But it wasn't until puberty he really began to understand the disconnect between his brain and body. For the first time in his life he felt uncomfortable in his own skin. Like his body was betraying him. It felt so wrong. "First I told the doctor. She slowly helped me put a word to it. The Mandalorians…they're my family. They always did what was right for me. Always helped me. They love me…I told them I was a boy and- they treated me as such. I was nervous at first, but after that everything was easy."

You smile up at him. "I'm grateful they received you with such kindness." You say in earnest.

"I am too." Din echoes your sentiment. "And- I'm glad you are so kind." Under the helmet, a blush goes over the tips of his ears.

"I love you Din…the rest is easy."

The rest of Din's face goes hot. "I-I love you too."

He still can't believe he's so vulnerable with you. Even more so he can't believe that you still want him everytime he is. There you are again, piercing through his beskar to look into his heart.

"Din?"

"Yes, Cyar'ika?"

"Before I forget, you're a very good kisser..."