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once-upon-an-imagine · 4 months

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Always On My Mind - Steve Harrington

A/N: omg! I have no idea how this happened 😊 I finally got this out and I really, really hope you like it as much as the first one! thank you so much for all the love (and for the patience!)

Warnings: reader is hurt (like badly hurt) but it's only mentioned at the beginning, I think that's it but let me know if I missed anything. also, this is a sequel to You Keep Me Hanging On so I would advise you read that one first (link at the bottom)

Disclaimer: I don’t own Stranger Things :) gif isn’t mine :D

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Always On My Mind

If I made you feel second-best I'm so sorry I was blind You were always on my mind You were always on my mind

You were trying extremely hard to focus. It was over. You had made it. You were back at Hawkins and you made it to the hospital. Max was hurt. And so was Eddie. Although his injury wasn’t as bad because you ran out to help him. You saw the nurses take Max one way and Eddie the other way. You turned around and saw Robin comforting Erica and making sure they would check her as well since that idiot Andy basically attacked her. And on the other side, you saw Steve. He was trying his best to calm Lucas and Dustin down. You blinked a few times and you tried to make your way to them but…

“You’re bleeding!” you heard Nancy’s voice next to you. You opened your mouth to say something but blood came out. “Oh my God!” Nancy grabbed you when you were about to hit the floor. “STEVE!”

You tried to stay up with Nancy’s help and you saw Steve, Dustin, and Lucas look your way. Steve felt his heart drop the second he saw you. You had blood on your stomach and you were trying to hold yourself up. You heard him screaming your name as he ran over to you, to help you keep you up.

“Sweetheart, look at me!” he said, placing his hand on your cheek while you heard Dustin and Lucas screaming for someone to help them. “Why didn’t you tell me you were hurt? I asked you if you were hurt!” he said with a few tears rolling down his cheeks.

“I’m s-sorry” you before your eyes rolled to the back of your head and you almost collapsed on the floor but Steve quickly held you, screaming for a doctor to help as you passed out in his arms.

“HELP!”

Steve jumped awake on his bed and felt he was sweating cold. He placed his hand on his chest and he could feel his heart beating incredibly fast. He sat down on the bed and grabbed the glass of water on the nightstand to calm himself down.

It had been a few weeks after they came back from the UpsideDown. Max was still at the hospital, and you and Eddie had been staying with him. Mostly because Eddie was still kind of lying low since a lot of people still thought he was a murderer. And you, because your parents were out of town with his parents and cared about just as much that their daughter was in the hospital. He ran a hand through his hair and got out of his parents’ bed. He walked over to his room where you were staying and silently opened the door, sighing in relief when he saw you peacefully asleep. He closed the door and walked downstairs to the kitchen, where he found his other guest.

“Munson-”

“Jesus H. Christ!” Eddie jumped a little, turning around to see Steve. “You scared the shit out of me, man” he said, placing his hand on his chest as he held his crutch on his right hand.

“Um, what are you doing?” Steve asked confused.

“Well… I was just… a bit hungry” Eddie explained.

“Are you high?”

“Uh… would you be upset if I was?”

“No” Steve shrugged.

“Then yes, I am very much high, Harrington” he smiled politely at him. “You want some?” he asked, pointing at the joint on the counter.

“You know what? Yes” Steve said, grabbing it and taking a hit.

“Alright, now it’s a party” Eddie chuckled when Steve coughed a little. “You okay there, man?”

“Yeah, it’s just… been a while” he said. “Let me grab those for you” he said, walking over to the cabinet where Eddie was trying to reach for the chips.

“Thanks” Eddie said grabbing something to drink too and the brownies you had made earlier before the two of them walked to the living room. “So, what’s up?”

“What?” Steve asked, confused.

“Why can’t you sleep? Did you have another nightmare?”

“Yeah” Steve said, drinking his soda. “You?”

“Yep” Eddie said, grabbing the chips. “Those fucking bats really made a number on my leg man” he said, looking at the cast on his right foot. “You know… I may have not made it if it wasn’t for her, right?” Steve silently nodded. After you were taken by the doctor, Dustin confessed that you had gone out to help Eddie and the bats attacked you instead but you kept insisting he had it worse. “Was your nightmare about her?”

He had never talked about that moment after it happened. He had been glued to you the entire time, never leaving your side and taking care of your every need. He didn’t speak while you were out, which was about a day. And when you woke up, he yelled at you. He was so angry for you running out to help Eddie and he told you how reckless and careless you were. The two of you hadn’t spoken since, except for Steve letting you know you’ll be staying with him and asking every now and then if you needed anything.

“She fainted in my arms, man” Steve said. “There was blood coming out of her mouth and… her body and…” he closed his eyes. “I thought she was dead” he said, with his voice breaking a little. “I didn’t notice” he continued. “When we got to you and Dustin, she just said to help you and that you were bleeding horribly and that we needed to bring you back and then Max was even worse and…” he sighed. “And I didn’t see she was in pain” he said, sitting back. “How could I have been so stupid? And then when she wakes up instead of being glad that she’s gonna be okay I yelled at her!”

“Yeah, that was probably not your best move” Eddie chuckled as Steve placed his hands over his face and rested his elbows on his legs.

“She probably hates me now and I wouldn’t blame her” he said, brushing a hand through his hair.

“Seriously? You have to be dumber than I thought, Harrington” Eddie laughed. “She doesn’t hate you” he insisted and Steve looked at him. “Do you honestly think she’ll still be here if she hated you?”

“Well she’s hurt and-”

“And she doesn’t give a fuck about that. You and I know her well enough to know that she does whatever she wants. I told her to stay back and she didn’t listen to me. You told us to stay on the boat when we were at the lake and she didn’t care. Do you think she would stay here just because you told her to? She could go to Wheeler’s or Robin’s-”

“Maybe it’s because you’re here too. She’s worried about you-”

“Yeah, because that’s who she is. She would rather help get me and Max to the hospital before saying she was hurt too. Trust me, Harrington, that means nothing, man” he said, taking another puff of the joint.

“Well, since you seem to know so much and I don’t, why don’t you enlighten me, Munson, and tell me why you think she’s here” Steve glared at him a little.

“Isn’t it obvious?” he said, letting the smoke out. “Because of you” he simply said.

“What? What are you talking about?”

“Well, maybe, and I’m just thinking out loud here, she was waiting for you to tell her that you love her back?” he said, making Steve choke on the soda he was drinking.

“H-how do you-?”

“Know about that? She’s my friend, man. Unlike you, I didn’t yell at her and told her she was stupid for doing what she did. I thanked her for helping me and we talk all the time” he explained. “Unlike you, who has been avoiding her like the plague” he laughed.

“I have not!”

“Seriously, dude? Other than, ‘Do you need anything?’ and ‘Are you hungry?’ you’ve barely spoken to her” he explained.

“I was… trying to give her some space” Steve tried to reason with him.

“She doesn’t want space, man! God, you are so stupid!” he said, getting closer to him and hitting the back of his head.

“Ouch!”

“Snap out of it, man! I mean it! We went over this I told you when we were on the UpsideDown. For some reason, which, believe me, for the life of me, I still do not understand, that girl loves you. She loves you, man! She told you even though she thought you still loved Wheeler, do you understand how brave that shit is? And you still haven’t told her? You’re running away dude, and, do you know who never, ever rushes into anything and instead runs away from shit?”

“Cowards” Steve said, feeling even worse.

“Exactly. And whatever I’ve called you in the past, Harrington, you are no coward. So, what the fuck is it? Are you seriously still hung up on Nancy Wheeler-?”

“No! I am not in love with Nancy, okay?” Steve snapped.

“Then what the fuck is your problem, Steve?”

“Ugh!” he grunted. “I can’t believe I’m discussing this with Eddie Munson” he sighed.

“I’m gonna choose to take that as a compliment” Eddie smirked.

“Why do you even care? Wouldn’t you want me to screw up so you can be with her?”

“Whoa, dude where did you get that idea? We’re just friends” Eddie insisted.

“Really? Because the two of you seemed really close when we were on the UpsideDown, and you said ‘If I were you, I would not take her for granted, man. 'Cause that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen. And if you let her go, someone else might not be so stupid’” he said, mocking Eddie’s voice.

“Okay, now I do take offense. I don’t sound like that” Eddie glared at him. “Look, I’m not blind. She’s pretty and she has a kickass personality. If she weren’t totally hung up on you, I might even think that I may have a chance and go for it. But it’s useless. She wants you for some reason. And it’s not like I’m in love with her like you are” he shrugged.

“Stop saying that!” Steve complained.

“Why? Aren’t you?” Eddie smirked. Steve took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair again.

“Look, the last time… I said that to anyone” he started. “It just… it didn’t go well” he told Eddie. “Like at all” he said sadly. “And I guess I’m just… scared that… she’s also going to realize that she can do a lot better than me and the same thing is going to happen” he said, sadly. “Maybe that’s it. I’m not meant to be with anyone. I don’t really deserve it-”

“Alright, stop being so dramatic” Eddie said, rolling his eyes. “First of all, I’m flattered that you think I’m a lot better than you” he smirked.

“I didn’t necessarily mean you-”

“And secondly, as much as you know that I hate to admit it… Dustin’s right man. You are a good dude. Trust me, I experienced first class of the asshole that was King Steve” he said, making Steve glare a little at him. “But, I don’t really see that guy anymore. I mean, you even took me in” he said. “You drive the kids every day to see Max. You drive Robin wherever she needs to go. You helped at the whole donation thing Mrs. Wheeler asked you to. You’ve come a long way, Stevie. And trust me, I’m not the only one who’s noticed” he said, making Steve smile just barely. “Stop being so hard on yourself, man. You deserve to be happy. And so does she” he told him.

“Thanks, man” Steve said, putting his drink up so Eddie would toast with him.

“Sure” he said, getting back to his seat. “Also, if you screw it up, I’m waiting a few months to make a move. Just letting you know now” he chuckled, making Steve glare at him but he laughed a little. Who would thought that King Steve and Eddie ‘the freak’ Munson would have ended up being friends?

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“Hey” Steve heard your voice as you walked into the kitchen where he was making breakfast. He smiled when he saw you were wearing his yellow sweater.

“Good morning” he smiled nervously.

“Um, I hope you don’t mind I borrowed your sweater. I got cold in the middle of the night” you explained, sitting on one of the counter chairs.

“Let me help you-” Steve said, noticing your pained expression but you stopped him with your hand.

“I’ve got it” you smiled a little. “Thanks” you said. “So, where’s Eddie?” you asked, confused. He was usually up by now.

“Oh, he’s still asleep” Steve informed you and you simply nodded.

Not only were they up very late last night, Eddie said, he would give them some space so he could finally talk to you. He was exhausted but there was no way he wouldn’t be there to help you.

“You know, I had no idea you knew how to cook” you said, all of the sudden. He had been mostly ordering food for the three of you. And you had cereal or frozen waffles for breakfast, unless Eddie was in the mood to cook, who was actually not that bad.

“Um, full disclosure, I have no idea if they’re gonna be any good” he laughed nervously.

“Would you like some help?”

“No-!” he quickly said, turning to you. “Um… you should be resting. I’ve got it” he insisted. “Do you need anything?” he asked, going back to the food and cursing himself for repeating the same question he asked you all the time as Eddie pointed out.

“Um, I’m okay” you told him. “I was actually wondering if um… maybe you can take me to my house later today?” you asked, making Steve drop the spatula in his hand and he turned to look at you.

“Y-you want to go home?” he asked, feeling his heart breaking. Had he missed his chance?

“If you can’t take me is fine. Is not that far. I can probably walk-”

“No!” he said, walking over to you and grabbing your hands in his.

“No?” you asked, confused. Steve looked like he was about to cry. Or throw up. Or both. “Steve, are you okay?”

“Okay. Here it goes” he said, looking away. “I’m sorry” he blurted out. “I am so sorry about everything I did. I am the stupidest man on Earth for making you feel like you didn’t matter to me” he continued. “I am so sorry for yelling at you when you woke up. I was just so angry at myself because I didn’t notice you were hurt. And you didn’t feel like you could tell me and I am so sorry for that!”

“Steve-”

“No, please, let me finish” he interrupted you. “Look, I know that you were upset about the whole Nancy thing and you have every right to” he said. “But, I need you to know that I don’t have feelings for Nancy. Not anymore. She’s just my friend” he insisted. “And…” he sighed. “D-do you remember the first time I called you? And asked you if you could come get me and you stayed with me?”

“I remember” you nodded.

“I wanted to call Robin” he admitted and you frowned, confused. “I have no idea why but I dialed your number and… I felt really embarrassed because I didn’t want you to see me like that. But you came and… you stayed with me and… I knew then” he said in a serious tone.

“Knew what?” you asked, still confused about this whole speech.

“I knew that I was falling for you” he admitted, making your heart flutter. “I know that I was an asshole in high school and that you didn’t like me, even if we’ve known each other our whole lives. And then, I finally got the chance to actually get to know you, and… you were the best person I met. You were there when I broke up with Nancy and when Billy Hargrove beat the shit out of me. You were always there. You stayed with me after the Starcourt thing because you didn’t want me to be alone and you helped me whenever we had job interviews and… you always make me feel like I am worth something and I am so sorry if I ever made you feel otherwise because… you are the most important person in my life. And I am so sorry that I didn’t tell you this sooner” he kept going, not noticing the small smile that was forming on your face. “I’m sorry I yelled at you when you woke up. I know I already said that but… I was just so scared, I thought I had lost you and… I honestly don’t think that I could live without you in my life” he said, with a few tears running down his face.

“Steve-” you said, placing your hand on his face.

“I love you” he finally said, feeling an enormous weight being lifted off his shoulders. “I love you so much, sweetheart. And I am so sorry it took me so long to tell you I was just being a coward because…” he sighed. “You know what happened when I said that to Nancy” he said, looking down at your linked hands. “It destroyed me and… if it’s possible, I love you so much more but… I didn’t think that I was deserving enough of you so… I was running away” he said, looking back at you. “I love you so much and I am so sorry. If you’ll still have me, I would love to be with you, but… if you still want to go home, I respect that too” he said, smiling sadly.

“What? Steve, I was just asking if you could take me home to get more clothes” you explained with a sweet smile, making Steve widen his eyes.

“W-what?”

“But now that I know that you love me” you smirked a little at him and he laughed a little, throwing his head back and you saw him blush.

“Well, I don’t care. I said it. I love you” he repeated.

“I would like to jump over this counter and kiss you right now, but I’m pretty sure you would get mad and say that I’m hurt and that I shouldn't-” you were cut off by Steve walking over to you and leaning down to kiss you.

You had kissed Steve before but it wasn’t like this. Something was different. You didn’t know how it could but it was even more perfect. His arms wrapped carefully around your waist, bringing you closer.

“I love you so much” he repeated, smiling when he saw the look on your face.

“I love you too” you said before he kissed you again. “And, for the record, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was hurt” you admitted. “I didn’t think it was that bad” you told him.

“You still should have told me” he said, brushing your cheek with his thumb.

“I know” you smiled sheepishly. “I’m sorry I scared you” you told him. “And that it’s making you have nightmares” you said.

“How did you-? Did Eddie tell you?”

“No” you smiled. “I know you, Steve” you said, as if it was obvious.

“How have you been sleeping?” he asked, worriedly.

“Well, if I’m being honest… I think it would be better if… maybe… you could stay with me?” you asked with a small smile. “If that’s okay?”

Steve hugged you closer to him and kissed your temple. “Whatever you want, sweetheart” he said, kissing you again.

“Not that I’m not loving this moment, but I think the food is burning” you said, making Steve let go of you instantly.

“What?”

“Are you two still figuring shit out or are you together already? I’m hungry!” you heard Eddie’s voice coming from the stairs, making you laugh.

“You can come down, Eddie” you said, as he hopped over to the kitchen with his crutches. “Although as for the food, it doesn’t look good” you said, as Steve tried to salvage what was left of the breakfast he was making.

“Aw, Stevie, you went through all this trouble for me?”

“Don’t flatter yourself, Munson” he said, tossing the ruined food. “So… who’s in the mood to go out to eat?”

“This is who you really wanna be with, princess?” Eddie asked you, making you laugh as Steve glared at him, and punched his arm.

“I think it’s sweet that he tried” you said, smiling at Steve.

“Thank you, love” he said, kissing you.

The End

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[Part 1]

A/N: sooo, I really hope you loves like it, and there is a tiny chance that I might do another version where the reader chooses Eddie, but no promises! xD

tags: @nerdygamingartist , @booksandlighters , @vilentia , @plk-18

#stranger things #stranger things imagine #steve harrington #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington oneshot

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love-kurdt · 3 months

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Swooping, Sloping, Cursive Letters: 7

word count: 1040

warning: underage drinking

PLEASE READ THIS IS ME TRYING FIRST, AS THIS STORY RELIES HEAVILY UPON THE CONTEXT OF TIMT

January 21, 1988

Dear Will,

It’s been a few weeks since the blow-up on my dad. It’s been eating away at me. I said it with obvious sarcasm, but what if my dad actually thought it was true? Like, he wouldn’t be wrong, but I don’t want him to know. It’s scary, thinking about what he could do to me. I’ve heard about those camps where they try and change you. They always leave there more traumatized than when they were initially sent in. But enough doom and gloom for one letter.

I just got home from the basketball game, and we’re all going to a party in about an hour. Our first high school party. Lucas got invited by the team, and then he invited us. I’m still debating whether or not this is a good idea. You know, with the whole Upside Down trauma thing. We all have our own problems to deal with, but I remember specifically that you have really bad claustrophobia, and I just think going to a crowded party might trigger it. But that’s just me and my overthinking. And yeah, I know what you’re going to say, ‘Mike, I’m fine, don’t worry about me,’ but are you really? Are you really fine? Because that’s one thing that’s really bothered me since everything ended. You’re still obviously dealing with some shit, and I don’t blame you at all. You should be suffering.

That came out so fucking wrong, I didn’t mean that at all. You deserve every good thing this fucked up world has to offer, and you should never have to suffer ever again. I just mean that considering everything, it would be a huge shock to me if you were just able to recover with the blink of an eye. So when you tell me you’re fine, I’m sorry. I don’t believe you. I love you, and I want you to trust me enough to be able to open up to me and tell me what’s on your mind. And you know I’ll listen all day if it comes down to that. It doesn’t even matter what you’re even saying, I just love hearing the sound of your voice. Jesus Christ, everything is coming out wrong. No pun intended. Everything you say matters to me, but that’s probably already implied by the “I love you,” so I’m just gonna stop rambling on and on about this.

You’re coming over in a few minutes, ahead of everyone else. I love how we’ve always made plans like this, with you arriving earlier so it’s just the two of us. It makes me feel wanted. Even though you don’t actually want me. Not in the way I want you. Anyway, before I get all mopey and pathetic– Lucas insisted upon all of us “pregaming,” whatever the hell that means. I don’t know. Maybe this party could be a blessing in disguise. It could represent things finally going back to normal for us. I really hope so. You– we all– deserve this.

—

It’s currently 2:30 in the morning, and you’re passed out on my bed like a fucking starfish. Before the Party came over, you told me you didn’t want to drink, for pretty obvious reasons. And I really respected that, Will, you know? I respected your self control and your aversion to ending up like Lonnie. I even told you I’d stay sober in solidarity with you. So we didn’t pregame like the rest of our friends– yeah, now I know what pregaming is. Basically getting drunk before going full-on blackout at the actual event.

Which was why I was shocked to see you stumbling over to me like you’d been drinking since 3pm. You called out my name, and I barely had any time to register what was happening before you slung your arms over my shoulders and jumped on top of me, knocking me over onto the couch behind me. The landing kind of hurt, since throwing all your weight on me caught me off guard. And I’m not even going to try to confront the way you shoved your entire face onto mine, your lips narrowly missing my mouth. That was obviously just a mistake, probably just you being drunk and lacking coordination or something. But the way you looked at me, Will… I had to remind myself on a loop that you were drunk.

I asked you how much you’d had to drink, and you told me “Uh, like, five shots of vodka.” And I know you have free will (again, no pun intended) to do whatever you damn well please, but I just felt kind of blindsided. Because you told me you didn’t want to drink tonight. But then I asked you what changed your mind. You said that you just did the shots because everyone around you was telling you to, but to not make a big deal out of it, because even though you didn’t want to drink, you were still having a good time. So I left it alone.

But it got me thinking. For as long as I’ve known you, you’ve been so incredibly selfless. You’d do anything to make people happy. But sometimes you do it at your own expense. You did it during 1985 when we ignored you all summer and then swept it all under the rug when you left for California. You did it with me when I said that horrible thing, and not even 24 hours later, you told me it was fine. And you did it with the painting when you were silently sobbing next to me in the van. I still want to talk to you about that one. I just don’t know how to bring it up without scaring you away. It just hurts to see you do things that clearly make you unhappy. You shouldn’t do that. You deserve so much better.

Anyway, I turned you onto your side so you don’t choke and die. I just hope you don’t beat yourself up in the morning. But I know you will, Will. Okay, I swear that was the last pun. I’m gonna go now and try to scooch myself between you and the wall.

Love,

Mike

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undreaming-fanfiction · 2 years

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Banished (2)

You asked, I delivered. Ish. There will be three parts to this, but I wanted to split them because I have an attention span of a goldfish. The previous part can be found HERE.

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

Eddie Munson's mind is racing. That isn't unusual for him, his brain is basically a race track, but instead of overflowing with ideas for campaigns or songs, he's basically having a breakdown if he ever had one. What a joke, he thinks to himself, you get accused of several murders, get torn to shreds by bats from another dimension, die and come back, but that's just okay while a dinner with Karen Wheeler sends you spiraling? You moron.

The dinner is only tomorrow, he still has plenty of time, but he can't sleep, can't rest, can't do anything and before he knows it, he's knocking on Steve's door. He curses himself for not checking the time when an obviously sleepy (and shirtless. Why is he always shirtless?!) Steve opens the door, only an inch, and peers outside. "Eddie? What's wrong?" He swings the door fully open and Eddie can hear the clang of his signature spiked bat as Steve lets it fall on the ground. That's going to damage the floor, Eddie thinks. And then he remembers that the Harringtons haven't even checked if their son is alive after the earthquake and his mind adds, good. Maybe I should drop it again. From the staircase. Twice.

Eddie's eyes dart to the side, anywhere but Steve's bare chest. One crisis at a time, thank you. "Harrington. I mean...shit. Hi Steve. Can I...can I come in?" Noticing Steve's stunned silence, he quickly adds: "I swear this isn't one of the world ending things. It's mundane, really. But I didn't know where else to go, so..." he points vaguely at himself, "here I am, I guess. I'm also sorry for waking you up, shit, should have said that first. Really sorry."

Steve gives a humorless laugh and steps to the side, letting Eddie in. "Yeah, nothing to be sorry for. Being tired and actually sleeping seem to be two completely different things." Eddie kicks off his shoes and Steve points him to the kitchen. "You want something to drink?"

Eddie wonders if maybe a shot, two or half a bottle of vodka would do the trick. If it would get him to calm down. Probably not. "Um..." he croaks out, "no. No thanks, I...drank. Before I came here. Like, not alcohol. Coke. Not...that kind of coke. Jesus H Christ," he rubs his forehead and closes his eyes. It's becoming more and more obvious that tomorrow is going to be a disaster.

Steve just leans against the kitchen door frame and blinks, confused. "...you okay Eddie?"

"Yes. Possibly. Depends." He takes a deep breath and finally looks at Steve properly. The chest hair isn't helping his mental stability and this time, he doesn't have a good excuse to throw any clothing at him. "I...look. The whole banished thing is getting kind of old and it seems Wheeler's mom seems to agree and...she invited me over, which I know you know, I don't know why I'm telling you since you were the one who made that miracle happen, but I...I have a slight problem."

The pretty face in front of him scrunched into a confused frown. "Don't you...want to go?"

Eddie throws up his hands and it takes him some serious self-discipline not to rub his fingers between Steve's eyebrows to make that frown disappear. "Oh no, nonono. I mean yes. I want to go. So much. But um...I...shit, this is going to sound absolutely ridiculous and I can't believe I'm saying this, but I don't want to fuck this up, okay? I can't afford to fuck this up." There, he said it. Eddie never wanted to be emotionally invested in anything or anyone that could hurt him, always placing his personal integrity - hobbies, aesthetics, beliefs - over impressing other people, but here he is, admitting to Steve Harrington of all people that he found something worth changing his approach. "So for the first time in my life, I want to...make a good impression. But," he sighs, tugs a strand of his hair in front of his mouth, "with the whole end of the world thing, all of my clothes are gone. Like, melted. Burned. I didn't have much of a presentable wardrobe even before, but now..."

Steve sucks in a breath. "Oh."

Eddie nods and drops his eyes to the floor again. This is starting to feel like a really bad idea. "Yeah, so I know this is weird as hell and you're well within your rights to tell me to fuck off, but-"

But then Steve is grabbing his wrist, pulling him upstairs. "Come on," he interrupts his rambling and Eddie's chest squeezes impossibly tight around his self-proclaimed cynical heart at the kindness in his voice, "let's see if I can find something that fits you."

...

Eddie ends up spending the night. Not in the way he would have liked, but Steve is off work the next day and he insists on perfecting everything - "it's absolutely not that I'm not into your look, I mean...you know what I mean, but I want you to feel calm, man. Parents can be terrifying, but Karen - Mrs. Wheeler - is a good person. And you need to sleep to entertain those little shits the way they expect, otherwise they'll eat both of us alive." So they go through Steve's wardrobe, find some older pieces (still better than anything Eddie's ever owned) that he used to wear before his shoulders and thighs decided to do the thing that has Eddie secretly salivating.

Steve also brings in his hair salon supplies, as Eddie jokingly calls them, and helps brush Eddie's unruly locks into a simple low ponytail. Eddie doesn't let anyone touch his hair, the gesture is too intimate, but he can't find a good excuse to say no and the experience ends up being...pleasant. And he isn't going to follow that thought because it leads to hell. Not the religious one, fuck that, but hell of unrequited feelings, awkwardness and pity.

The end result has Eddie feeling...mixed. He looks at himself in the mirror, a simple dark polo, still slightly larger, but it might be seen as an intent, tucked into non-torn jeans. His hair is still fluffy, but looks more put together. He looks put together. He stares at his reflection and thinks is this what I would have looked like if I was normal? Would I have a normal job, a diploma, all that shit? His eyes slightly shift to Steve's reflection, looking at him tired but proud, and his brain unhelpfully adds: Would I be Steve's type then? Stupid.

He turns to Steve and gestures at the polo. "Not bad, huh? Who knew I could pull off the King Steve look?"

Steve laughs out loud, throws his head back. "Give yourself more credit, man, you don't look like that much of a douchebag. Suits you, though. If you ever feel like going for something more daring."

"Daring," Eddie rolls that word on his tongue, trying to sound offended but failing. "Daring my ass, Harrington! Don't think for a moment your polos trump the whole my-daughter-or-son-can-never-bring-this-guy-home look."

Steve produces an undignified snort, but holds Eddie's eyes. "Well, maybe you just need to date someone whose parents are never home," the asshole shrugs as Eddie nearly self-combusts.

"Oh." Quickly, say something not creepy. "Good thing I know someone like that then." Fuck.

They stare at each other for long seconds and Eddie notices Steve is actually blushing, the master of flirting suddenly has the most beautiful pink hue spreading from his face to his - still bare, goddammit Harrington! - chest, but he doesn't look uncomfortable. Eddie wants to pour a gallon of water on the tiny flame of hope that sparked in his chest, but apparently stupid is his new way of life.

And Steve isn't fucking helping. He runs fingers through his hair again, not distracting at all, and smiles sheepishly at Eddie. "Well, you should go for them." Them, not her. Oh.

Eddie, feeling brave and still very, very stupid, smiles and attempts to tug another strand of hair in front of his face, but the ponytails there and he feels incredibly exposed. "I think I will," he tells Steve, tucking his hands into the back pockets of his - Steve's - jeans. "I just need to deal with this whole banished thing and if it goes well, I'll ask them out. Maybe for coffee. Coffee is a good first date idea, no?"

Steve nods. "Yeah. I can't imagine them not liking coffee."

"Good."

There is a comfortable silence between them now. Eddie wonders if he's dreaming, if his brain made up this whole conversation, but he can't imagine a single dream of his where he'd end up wearing Steve's polo shirts. Or maybe...nope, still not going there.

He yawns and waves his hand in front of his mouth. "Sorry," he says and then bursts out laughing when Steve yawns too. "Contagious, isn't it?"

"Yep." Steve looks at his bed, the only clean island in the sea of piles of clothes. "Do you snore, Munson?"

Eddie snorts and wiggles a finger at Steve. "That's for me to know and for you to find out."

Part 3 will be up eventually, I already have it sort of planned. Tagging the folks who mentioned they'd like a continuation, sorry if that's *clears throat for the best Max impression* presumptuous of me.

@subparwritersuperbreblogger, @gay-stranger-things and two others who I can't tag for the life of me, I'll just respond to your comments!

#steddie #steddie ficlet #steddie drabble #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #strangerthings #stranger things ficlet #strangerthingsfanfiction

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atvace · 9 months

Text

Lady Dior and the Seven Dilfs

Chapter 2: Fuck the military (litteraly)

masterlist

[shooting range]

"Jesus fuckin Christ this place look like Nevada in Madness Combat." you tried your best to not step on the most suspicious-looking ground substance. "it's a range, (Y/N)." Gaz opened the shed full of armory crates whilst Soap set up the dummy target and then to the workhouse.

"didn't you take worser training environment to get in the FBI top class?" Soap came back with a few handguns, wiping it with a cloth. "No, I fucked my way up to the top." you sarcastically place your hands on your hip. you're wearing stylish grey Bershka cargo pants and a Zara Dark Green Knit crop top, gaslighting Gaz and Soap by saying this is what they gave you as a uniform.

"Okay princess, pick your poison." Gaz came back with a few stacks of crates, opening them one by one.

revealing a matte black XM4, HDR, and a Gallo SA12. you frowned at the availability of the big guns because you usually have your personalized Dragunov.

"Are you gatekeeping the good guns..?" you slowly turn to them with a disturbing glare. their faces dropped and looked at each other in unison. Soap broke the gaze and cleared his throat.

"(y/n)- I think its best for you to use the basics just this time-"

"you're judging me."

"no, but-"

"you're judging me."

"I just-"

"you're judging me."

Gaz separated the two of you, "OKAY OKAY how about we use the handguns before getting into the primary weapon? Cool?" he said, spreading the handguns across the wooden table. Soap shrugged and picked his signature m1911, clucking it and released the safety lock while on the other hand, you picked your good old revolver.

you both looked at Gaz who didn't pick anything. he showed his slightly swollen palm, "I still have a sore hand from last mission's accident, I want to let it rest for a few days." you raised your eyebrow in approval, "Fair." you cluck in your revolver to your side.

"woah okay, cowgirl. playing dangerous?" Soap chuckled at your weapon of choice. you open the barrel and load it with bullets.

"Underestimate me one more time," you rolled the barrel creating a clicking metal sound, and swiftly flipped your hand to get the barrel in again. "I'll Russian roulette your ass." you stare at him.

"since the pretty mohawk boy here seemed to know what he's doing, what about you go first?" you look at the dummy targets that Soap placed. an imprinted person with a few circles in the color red could be seen in the distance.

"okay, sure." Soap exclaimed and got into his position. he shot three times, the sound of bullets clanking rang in the air. you squinted your eyes a little to see what part he hit. he shot the right chest, cheek, and neck of the dummy.

"Huh. blud got smoker throat and a hole in the lung. Are you aware of the fact that the human heart is on the left side of the chest?" you look up at Soap and he looks back at you. "my hand trembled a little, it's the coffee." you scoffed at his none sense.

"don't blame them beverage." you walk up to the stance, "you train here often?" Soap raised his eyebrow at the question. "yeah, duh?" in front of the line you raised your pistol eye level. "..and that's the best you can shoot?" you cluck your revolver's hammer. 'BANG'

the light smoke come out of your revolver's muzzle. Soap was a little startled at the sudden gunshot but when he looked at the target, you hit right in the middle of the head. complete bullseye.

you giggled at Soap's dumbfounded face and jumped in front of him, waving the back of your hand to him. "and that with pretty nails" you wiggled your colorful acrylic nails that Soap's bright blue orbs reflected.

the three of you practiced a few other guns, Gaz was actually impressed by the amount of skills you have. except for a shotgun. when you tried using one, it flew right under your armpit hitting Gaz in the balls.

Half of the time you made fun of Soap, but to your liking he didn't get offended. you guys are like two dads with a chaotic daughter. the window welcomed the shifting color of the sky from yellow to orangeish. and you three decided it's time to go inside and clean up.

[ indoor, living room ]

"Uno, motherfucker." (Y/N) threw her last +4 Uno card down to the stash of previous cards. She stood up and celebrated her own winning to the invisible cheering people. the sound of the men groaning in defeat lingers around the room. "Gaz, what you got there?" Soap tried to find hope as he's the only one that has 2 cards. the British just chuckled and handed another +4 to the stash. "damn it." Soap slams down his leftover cards.

Price has called Soap, telling him that The task forces had approximately 2 weeks day off, due to... well nobody been actin up so they got none to investigate. On days off like these, the 141 are just teenagers with graying hair.

like usual, Ghost is nowhere to be found, Price is doing his endless paperwork in the headquarter, Gaz and Soap would be either out in the pub, feeding the pigeons, or going out fishing like the average guy in their late 20s. but since you're here, they take their time to have a good bonding time with you indoors. and also lectured you a few things.

Gaz taught you how to use the dryer in the laundry machine since you always have your clothes stored and cleaned nicely by a personal nanny who came over to your apartment a few times a week so cleaning duties aren't your thing. Gaz was terrified when he found out you were chewing a tide pod whilst hes not looking.

You have no idea how laundry works. you're a nepo baby but your mom is dead from cancer and your dad.. cheated on your mom. This what made you had attachment issue and abandonment issue. even when your mom was dying in the hospital bed, her last words were "Men ain't shit. I'd rather you end my bloodline than getting cheated on. also, you should outlive Trump." you took it to heart, you took it serious.

Soap, he was lecturing you about the people you might going to see. You have to know who you talking to so you won't mess up your career or get demoted lower again for being a petty bitch. He said that Gaz, him, and you are sergeants. above that, it's Lieutenant Ghost. Above the five of them, it's General Sheperd and Kate Laswell. Soap told you about Colonel König from Kortac which kind of scares you about how Soap described his appearance. Soap showed you König's Korean partner, Horangi.

"wait I know this guy," you said to Soap, looking at Horangi's picture. "(y/n), you're...not supposed to 'know' this guy." Soap gave you a puzzled look. "this motherfucker got rejected from SM Entertainment because he got caught fucking the director's daughter in his own office." you huffed and place your hand on your chin inspecting his present appearance, "let me guess, gambler?" you snapped your finger. Soap's jaw dropped in appalled hearing your accurate remark

moving on, he told you about Ghost's old recruit, Keegan. the picture Soap showed you is him holding 3 bottles of Vodka with a wide toothy smile and red flushed drunken cheeks. he looks tall about 6'1 with a fluffy hair and a cold icy iris.

As an American-(your nationality), you find Europe men quite attractive. back when you were 10, you found an article talking about European being home to men with large penises. since then, you are intrigued to find a (rich) European husband. this man's picture in front of you is definitely your long-lost puzzle.

you have to fuck him.

I mean like, you don't need to marry him. You just want to feel what a real dick feels like because the men you had sex with in the past barely lasted 3 minutes. Live fast die young, try new things even though its nasty.

"He's like.. in his beekeeping age, you know what I'm saying?" you said to Soap giggling, still staring at Keegan's picture. "What was that supposed to mean?" he slowly pull the picture away from your grasp. "Nothing!... can I keep his picture?" "NO."

back to present time, you three decided to play Uno cards. which Soap was deliberately beaten twice. "How are you so good at this?" Soap gathered the cards and pack them back into the box. "skill issue." you smirked down at him, which he rolled his eyes and place back the box of cards to the shelf.

Gaz looked up at the clock that was hung on the wall, it shows that its 5 pm. he thought about something for a second before having a go-out idea."(Y/N), you drink?" Gaz typed something down to his phone. he swore he could hear her bone crack from tilting her head too fast. "yes." you smiled menacingly, waiting for him to say the words.

"Okay so lets go-" "YESS I'LL BE READY IN 5 MINUTES" You sprinted away from the two towards your assigned room, Soap chuckled while fixing his belt strap. "She is so..energized don't you think?" he leaned to the wall, watching you slam the door behind. "I think shes very charming. but I hope that doesn't apply on missions." Gaz shrugged, sinking his phone to his pocket. "Why?" Soap turned to him.

"profesionalism above personality."

You haven't done some adjustments to your room. rather than a barrack. the whole room was painted in industrial dark green. it's built like a fucking mental asylum but in green. you started to think there's a ratatouille going on inside the walls. the floors are dusty white textile flooring. in the side of the room, your whole stuff is neatly placed. and it's the only thing that is in fresh pink, white, and baby blue colors.

you dug through your duffle bag and pull out a short black cut-out body con dress that reveal the side of your hips. it was your best buys from the Euphoria series franchise Maddy Perez inspired. you swift to the mirror holding your make-up bag, diving your hand inside it and pull out a primer spray. after spraying the cold substance through your face, you quickly put on concealer in several spots of your face and blend it away with a beauty sponge. you just put on blush on, smeared a smoked eyeshadow, then lined a sharp eyeliner to her eyes. it was uneven but nobody can tell. you slipped on your Saint Laurent Opyum 110mm heel sandal. giving your pedicured black painted nails a show to the outside air. lastly, you smeared your lips with lip tint.

you clutched your black Prada shoulder bag and walk out of your room towards the men. you saw three figures by the cafeteria, one catches your attention, it was Ghost. your gaze caught his eyes, and he stared at you with his cold orbs. which also caught Soap and Gaz's attention and they both turned to you in unison.

"(Y/N), You're-" "dressing too much." Ghost cut him off and crosses his arms again. you feel your mouth fall slightly agape. "change, now." he demanded. "I think she looks great." Soap flustered at his own words, Soap looked at Gaz whose frozen in his place "Gaz?". "you look beautiful, (Y/N)" he lend out his hand which you accepted. you had a smug grin toward Ghost when Gaz pulled you softly to his side. "come on, princess. let's go to the bar." "Oh, you are such a gentleman." you said in a Spanish accent, blowing a kiss to his cheek and giggled. Ghost was left flabbergasted as you pulled away Gaz's grasp and walk in front of him.

Ghost got irritated and looked at Soap in a 'Are you seeing this shit right now' stare. "we're off duty, I don't see a problem dressing up neatly. maybe she wants a good first impression." he said, following the two. "Fucking hell." groaning in annoyance, Ghost followed the others from behind.

Gaz opened the shotgun door for you, gesturing for you to be in control of the car radio. as you elegantly sat, he closes the door and slid to the driver. which made Ghost stops in his tracks. "Oy fucking hell?" Gaz raised his eyebrow and shrugged.

"you DIYed your driver's license from an empty Froot Loops cardboard, Ghost. I'm not risking it again." Gaz shook his head in disapproval and got into the driver's seat. defeatedly, the skull face silently sits in the backseat with Soap whose trying to turn on the radio which resulted in Ghost facing his round ass.

you looked out of the window with your chin resting on your hand, gazing through the trees and sands outside the car. thinking about your past mistakes while the sound of Gaz and Soap chattering because of the radio jagging. you know you're a confident woman, you are mesmerizing, a sight for sore eyes, you love yourself and you always live your life to the fullest. but something about Ghost's words. maybe he's right, you're dressing too much. but how much is too much anyways? are you really that arrogant? why are you suddenly scared they wouldn't like you as a person?

'SMACK' "-welcome to Radio Love Life FM." Soap bonked the radio changing the buzzing noises to finally catching a signal to the public radio station. "fucking finally. let's go Gaz." you were slightly startled but the two didn't notice. you rub the back of your neck and chuckle. "is it always like that? you should get it fixed." Soap sat back down and nodded. "I'll tell Price to put it on the list." Gaz drove out of the base's gate while somebody doesn't seem to be able to stop staring at you the whole time.

Fantasy - Mariah Carey

there was a traffic jam unfortunately but the car ride was rather lively. it's just you, Gaz, and Soap singing along while Ghost leaned comfortably with earplugs, a huge noise-canceling Sony headphones, and put his hood on to cover his protection from the other's voice. he doesn't listen to music particularly he just wants to shut his ear the whole ride. "oHH I'm so into you! darling if you only knew, all the things that flow through my mind YEAHH" the three of you sang along, each holding an invisible microphone.

(5 minutes in, Bad Romance - Lady Gaga)

Soap dramatically run his hand down from his chest. "I want it bad, bad romance" "I WANT YOUR LOVE I WANT YOUR REVENGE YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE" you sang loudly to Gaz, as Soap sang the 'Ooh' part. "I WANT YOUR LOVE AND ALL YOUR LOVER'S REVENGE YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE" Gaz fisted his chest dramatically. the three of you sang the 'Ooh' part in chorus. receiving an irritated grunt from Ghost.

(10 minutes in, Collide - Justine Skye, Tyga)

"oh my God this is my favorite song." you cooed excitedly, repeating the lyrics with Soap. you also whimpered slightly at the naughty lyric which caused Gaz dazzled a little but he doesn't judge. you have a melodious voice that he is secretly a new fan of. he slightly grew a warm spot for you, even though you two just knew each other by today. You just slipped into his mind like a puzzle piece. "when you put your body on mine and collideeee, collideee" You look at Gaz and rubbed his forearm in a flirtatious way. his cheeks got warm.

(15 minutes in, Simon Says - YC Banks, B. Smyth)

"wait I know this song, it's popular in LA" you giggled and patted Gaz's shoulders. "really? What's it called?" he's unfamiliar with the song, so does Soap.

"Simon Says!" you whistled excitedly. Soap and Gaz's faces went pale as Ghost jolt his body and bloodily stared at you from the back. "approach the bed imma get it wet!!" you cooed to the lyrics. Gaz and Soap looked at each other with their jaws down in disbelief. Soap was about to reach for your shoulder but Ghost stops him by shaking his head, letting you sing the song.

"SIMON SAYSS SPREAD OPEN YOUR LEGS-" you sang. not noticing the guys went dead silent.

"And put yo hands behind yo head~" you took out your phone to snap a quick picture of yourself, still not noticing the sudden silence.

"Simon saaayss take a deep breath"

"Um, (y/n)"

"CAUSE TONIGHT WE GON MAKE A MESS BABYYY"

"(y/n)-"

"IMMA DIVE IN THAT PUSSY LIKE MIKE PHELPS"

"(Y/N)!" Gaz gripped your shoulder, you looked at him with your smile drops.

"What?! you wanna kill my vibe uh?" you hissed at his touch, but he took a deep breath then looks at you softly.

"(Y/N), were here." Gaz reassured as Soap and Ghost stared at her in amusement. Soap was holding back a laughter, his face is just as red.

'Oh." you looked around, it seemed like you were in a parking lot. there weren't that many cars around, but it was not too empty either. "Okay, thank-" You were about to open the door but Gaz held your arm again, gesturing you to sit. you didn't like it when anyone touches you but upon realizing, he's not letting you open doors by yourself. he finally opened the door for you and lend out his hand.

You'd be lying if you weren't flustered. he was being extremely nice to you since in the base. but you don't take it to heart, because his mama probably raised him right. he walked you towards the back door of the pub, pushing the door and letting you enter first. As you were inside, you could see an antler head hung behind the bartender with a few beer machines and a shotgun resting below it.

It was a Scottish pub, and the song that plays at the moment you entered was Killshot by Magdalena Bay which you hummed to the beat. there are not-so-many women in the pub but they were in the same dress code as you are.

But the ones they're wearing are probably rip-offs. "I like the song you sang back in the Car." Ghost said coldly, walking past you. "I know." you shrugged your shoulders smiling.

you found yourself sitting on the bar stool between Soap and Gaz. Ghost is in the corner of Soap's left. "Open bill? it'll be $120 for 4 people with free 2 bottles of vodka." the bartender cooed with a portable EDC machine in his hand. "Yes please" Soap gave him his card, which he scanned in his machine. "I'm sorry, your credit card declined." Soap flushed in embarrassment as he got his card back. "you know what, take this." you slid your platinum card across the table towards the bartender. "thank you," he scanned it and the light turned green. "any drinks?"

"Kentucky Bourbon" Ghost rested his chin to his hand.

"Whiskey," Soap followed. "same here" Gaz followed as the bartender nodded. "and you miss?"

"Brut." you didn't bother looking, you were just scrolling through Instagram. everyone around you looked at you awkwardly because of your drink choice. but the Bartender just nodded and scooted away to get the drinks.

"Your card is made out of metal?!" Soap turned to you while sliding his card down to the ragged leather wallet. which you were...slightly squick at the sight. "personal adjustment." you gave him a half smile.

"Soo, (y/n)." you turned to Gaz and shut your phone. "tell us about yourself, I don't think we heard a lot from you since we've been just introducing you to a new place this whole time." Gaz cast a smile. you look at him then down to your nails.

As you were about to speak, Ghost and Soap was also invested in what you were about to say. this caused you to look at them funny. "the fuck you guys interested in my life lore or something," you chuckled. "oh come on, everyone has something cool to say." Soap cracked his knuckles and rest his chin down.

"should I show you a minecraft parkour video below me talking or play Time Back - Bad Style music in the background?" Soap and Gaz snorted at the reference. you chuckled at their response and layed your eyes to your arcylic nails.

"Well, my mom was a billionaire which that makes me a nepo baby. I got into a private military school and Laswell used to be my mentor actually," you slid a strand of your hair behind your ear, revealing your Kate Spade Heritage Bloom Ear Crawler and feel their gaze at you. "that was when I'm...around 15 I think? I got lost track of time because I wasn't a phone type of girl." the bartender served the drinks.

"My childhood is full of horse riding, violin, and shopping. I admit, I'm a total baby. by the time my mom knew shes going to die, she sign me up for military so I can survive and all," you chuckled to yourself. "..here I am."

"what about your father?" Gaz picked up his glass to his mouth. Soap notices your sudden change of expression, "Oh, my dad? Well I uh- Umm.." you feel yourself shrunk. "That is completely fine, (Y/N). we'd understand." he places his hand on your bare back. you shrugged and weakly laughed, "Alright I get it now, you're all without fathers, right?-" "I'm not." Gaz cut you off. "fucking love my dad" he showed you a picture of him and Price catching a huge fish. "Price's fuckin awsome." he proudly said.

Your mouth falls slightly agape as Soap wheezes at the sight of the picture. "Captain Price is your dad?" you tilt your head to the side. "No, but I like to pretend he is." he put the picture back to his phone case. "Oh. good then." you took a sip of your drink, closing your eyes, feeling the alcohol explore your tongue. "Why is that a good thing?" he shifts his pupils, watching you holding your glass close to your lips. "Because I was about to say that he probably adopted you." Soap and Ghost turned to you in disbelief.

Lights Down Low - Maejor, Wake Flocka Flame

After chattering for a good half an hour, the night becomes more effervescent. your glasses dried up, people using the jukebox, the disco ball got down and some people are actually from the military that Soap and Gaz knows. they came over to your table to say hi and you got to know the other sergeants.

"This is 141's new recruit, Lady Dior." Gaz introduced you to one of his deputies. "Shes a mid-range support," Soap exclaimed about you to his friends "Say hi, Dior". at this point, it feels like you are a kid at an uncle's party. the men been introducing you to their friends, joked around and laugh it off. Ghost in the other hand, only nodded and observed his surroundings.

some of the soldiers introduced to you are from Shadow Company, you overheard. there's a few names you caught upon talking. there was Kevin, Graves, Christ, and a few average white dude's name. and you don't really take them so serious because their ranks are a little far below you. Apparently, Shadow Company is a private elite unit of military contractors. lead by an unreachable individual. you pin this at the back of your head, you want to dive more into this.

General Sheperd is a man with many secrets. back when you were first deployed with a human trafficking case, Sheperd is the kind of man who would slow down operations intentionally. he said it was an operator and intel error but you were so dead suspicious of him. you have a personal hatred towards him, it grew into a loathe of grudges you can't help but keep. upon working in the field investigation sector, you never knew why would Laswell trust Sheperd. demoted to the 141, you finally knew why. because Captain Price, Laswell, and Sheperd had a task force they retained. this is it, where you are.

"Vodka?" the bartender offered you your free bottle of it. you took it from him forcefully, yanking it from his grasp. you took a butter knife from Soap's empty sandwich plate, clicking the bottle twice in the bottom side and twice in the rear then yanked the cap off resulting a smoke to come out of it. the bartender, Ghost, Gaz, and Soap watched you religiously. you jerk your head back, deepthroating the liquid down your throat and slams the empty bottle to the table. wiping your lips with the back of your hand, you jump down the stool. "Hold this." pushing your purse to Gaz's chest.

you went down to the crowd of people feeling your friend's piercing gaze at your figure, you didn't care. you swayed your move to the girls who eventually got along with you. the vodka started its job intoxicating your veins.

a bottle of vodka consists around 17 shots. you knew you're going to die anytime sooner for being deployed as a sergeant, dying from alcohol poisoning is cooler than getting shot and buried in a dirt.

LoveGame - Lady Gaga

Its been a while since the last time you put yourself in such a situation. you feel yourself living the night away, letting go your demotion stress out with the vodka taking over you. the lub music nuzzles into your muscles, making you whirl your hips in circles with your hands above your head.

you feel a presence on your back, rather a tall one. your eyes drowned from the smell of grapes and sugarcane from the vodka lingering in your tongue. but you don't mind to turn around and see the uninvited guest.

Men.

you sighed in frustration, still swaying your hips side by side in a pretty rhythm. the guy in front of you seemed to smile at your moves but that turned into a frown when you feel someone sandwiched you from behind. another unknown person drunkenly tried to press into you. irritated, the taller guy swiftly wraps your waist with his hands and pulls you to a dark hallway of the pub. he softly presses you against the wall behind you.

"You...are one new bunny," His gruffled voice mixed with his musk-scented perfume. "Are you a civilian?" He leveled his nose to the crook of your neck, his deep Irish accent made your stomach knot. "..You smell like sterling."

You run your finger, trailing slowly from his arm up to his flexed biceps. you tilt your head a little, brushing your lips to his red drunken ears. "That depends on how you treat me tonight," you put your thumb to his chin, making him face you. but the alley was too dark for you to see his eyes. "Maybe I'll consider giving you a good swallow." you slurred words, feeling completely influenced.

His nose brushed against yours, feeling his breathing harder. As your lips nearly interlinked, a flash from the dance floor bounces to his iris.

it's the exact same eyes you saw from the picture Soap showed you.

#task force 141 #mw2 #keegan x reader #keegan x you #modern warfare 2 #simon ghost riley x you #soap mactavish x you #gaz garrick x you

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just-somehuman · 2 months

Text

I AM BACK FROM THE DEAD AND I BRING YOU BIBLE VERSES THAT REMIND ME OF THE OM CHARACTERS ✨✨✨✨✨✨

__________________

Lucifer - Galatians 6:2

"Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."

Reminds me of Lulu because he tends to take on everyone's burdens as well as his own. He puts others before himself usually, and that's just mfmfmfmf <333

Mammon - Proverbs 18:24

"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."

You can't look me dead in the eyes and tell me that Mammon hasn't always been the first to help them whenever MC needed it, and without hesitation too. Bro is so babygirl 🤭💖

Leviathan - Isiah 43:4

"Because you are precious in my eyes, and honoured, and I love you."

Sobbing everytime I read this verse.

These are the words Levi needs to hear because lil bro has a self-esteem the size of a molecule.

AND I KNOW SOME OF YOU NEED TO HEAR IT TOO 🔫🔫🔫

JESUS LOVES YOU, I LOVE YOU, WE ALL LOVE YOU ❤❤

Satan - James 3:17

"But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere."

Allow me a little over-analysis time hehe:

So basically Satan can be regarded as "wisdom" since he's the brains of the bros, and he technically came from the Celestial Realm since he was created just before the bros fell (or as they fell).

Ik ik he was created wrathful and vengeful, but he wasn't techincally. That anger isn't his: it's Lucifer's and his dad's. Imagine Satan being like a pure, clean, blank slate that was corrupted within seconds of his creation with anger that wasn't his.

TEARS RN 😭😭😭😭

Asmodeus - 1 Peter 4:8

"Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins."

I love this verse sm. Peter cooked, ate and left no crumbs.

Asmo loves the most out of the bros and it's so sweet <3

Beelzebub - Psalm 37:37

"Mark the blameless and behold the upright, for there is a future for the man of peace."

Beelie is generally (usually) the most calm out of the bros.

Lil homie so peaceful tho bc all he does is eat, work out, eat some more, love his bros, chill with MC, and eat again 😭

Belphegor - Matthew 5:4

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted."

Homegirl is still mourning the loss of Lilith.

I guess you could say MC was the comfort? 👁👁

Diavolo - James 2:24

"You see that a person is justified by works and not by faith alone."

AHFJKSJAKDJAK TO EVERY BELIEVER THAT SEES THIS, THIS IS SO IMPORTANT!!!!!!!

In relevance to Diavolo, it's more of him genuinely being a good person and not just in other demons' words.

Kind of 😭

Barbatos - Romans 12:12

"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer."

And Barbatos is all of the above ✨

Except maybe the prayer one bc I don't think there's any distinct faiths in OM 💀

Luke - Philippians 4:13

"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."

I think this is just such a Luke thing to say, especially since he's young and can't do much 🥹

Simeon - 1 Corinthians 13:4

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud."

ANOTHER FAV OF MINE 💖

I don't think I even need to explain why this reminds me of Simeon.

Solomon - Eccesliates 1:18

"For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief."

I present to you my favourite verse AND favourite book.

FUN FACT: King Solomon wrote Eccesliates, so these are the literal words of Solomon.

I guess not much more needs to be said as to why this reminds me of Solobro 💀

Thirteen - Psalm 41:7

"All who hate me whisper together about me; they imagine the worst for me."

Y'know I don't know much about Thirteen but I assume girl's got haters 😭

Raphael - Psalm 34:13-14

"Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit. Turn away from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it."

Honestly I have no idea why this reminds me of him, it just does.

Mephistopheles - Romans 14:21

"It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble."

Homie loves his lil bro more than anything, so he would do just about anything for him.

Pretty sure brother in this verse means neighbour or friend but it's the same thing.

BONUS:

Little D - 1 Corinthians 13:1

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal."

I HONESTLY JUST CACKLE EVERY TIME I READ THIS VERSE 😭😭😭

I'm pretty sure that Little D just wants to fit in with the rest of the squad though, so all of its yapping is with love 💖

__________________

OKAY THERE'S MY LIST THINGY. IDK WHAT ELSE TO SAY. I'LL MAKE AN ARR ONE TOO BC WHY NOT.

Also why was half the words cutting off at the end of each line when I made them small text lol 💀

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freeleyenrashespeakstruth · 1 year

Text

Nothing Racist Said... part 5

Now we can clearly see what is really going on here. No more political campaigns with racist rants against the "mexicans" although a few still use it. But more and more American Citizens No Other Nation To Call Our Own being pushed into poverty with no way out and no help. When this extreme poverty takes place in a human beings life and it is through no fault of their own it is very hard and humiliating to the victim of this attack on our basic civil human rights as written in our constitution. Some turn to drugs, some to alcohol, some both, and some can't deal with it and turn to suicide or murder and other crimes, and are jailed. Others turn to faith, my faith is in Jesus Christ and He is the only reason I am even still alive and still sane despite all that has happened.

Whites 57.8%, blacks 12.1%, others 30.1%, 2020

Wow! What happened to all the white people? At one time we comprised approximately 80% of this nation, but now we are only 57.8% and dropping. How can this be? Well when you secretly open up the borders and flood the nation with persons from all other races and nations and secretly force businesses to hire only non english speaking people, you are actually controlling the population and committing genocide against the race that is declining. Must speak spanish and must be latino are tools to remove non spanish speaking individuals and non latino people from the workforce. This includes non spanish blacks and non latino blacks as well as non spanish speaking and non latino whites as well. Still nothing racist being said on my part. Please pay attention.

Politicians are now running campaigns with promises to help the immigrants coming in, not the citizens they have vowed by the laws of our constitution. They have broken our constitutiona; laws by replacing the citizens with people from all other nation! But WAIT!!! Didn't they deport people who came here illegally during the last 30 years? Yes they did. President Obama even boldlu deported his own aunt back to Kenya once he became president just to prove he was fighting illegal immigration. Didn't he? And he deported latinos too didn't he? Well the criminals at least, right?

Still nothing racist being said on my part. Yes some latino criminals were deported, but since no documentation was ever required to enter in through the southern border they could freely come right back in by kidnapping a child, that easy. Indians have flooded the nation too but not many realized this because we were all told to watch the souther border only. Arabs were considered our enemies and were seldom ever permitted to come to the United States and stay, but that all changed when Obama announced that the United States of America was "no longer a christian nation" and that the "mooslims" were "our brothers" and "shlaam" was a good peaceful religion. "Mooslims"? "Shlaam"? I always heard them called "muslims" and their faith "islam", but never before "mooslims" or "shlaam". Obama spent the first 6 years of his 8 year presidency claiming he "was not a muslim" and the last 2 years praising "mooslims" and "shlaam", but because the agenda focused on dividing us by race EMOTIONALLY the emotions of all the crimes of years past took over. And by reporting and claiming the whites were the enemy of mankind since the world was created the narrative was working. Still til today though, the African American has not benefitted much at all, as the primary focus was to bring in as many brown people as possible, Latinos and Indians, then finally Arabs. Still nothing racist being said on my part.

So who was being deported all these years? Simple, white Europeans who had to take tests and score high in order to come to the USA, Asians, especially from communist nations such as China and North Korea, and Africans, who are mostly blacks and have poor education. But wait! Isn't that racist? Not on my part, I am only telling truth.

My obervations during this time period are this. As a taxi/limo driver I drove caregivers to their assignments of caring for elderly people. These caregivers were hired by agencies and all shared either one or the other FACT. They were either from Ghana, Africa or Jamaica, never from Nigeria unless they worked privately for Nigerian agencies, never from Kenya, South Africa, Ethiopia, or any other African nation. No caregivers were asian, indian, arabic, jewish, european, south or central america, canada, or anywhere else except Jamaica and Ghana Africa. Strange huh?

Taxi and limo drivers were mainly latino, indian, or arabic and most every business was latino, indian, or arab owned, and latino businesses were not required to hire outside their race, and most businesses were illegal. Since I am not racist I speak to many people from many other nations and I hear the FACT most did receive the social benfits no longer given to the citizens of the USA that we paid for and still continue to pay for with our tax money, and FACT most do not pay taxes because they are not citizens and there is no account for the tax money to go to. Sure some business owners would take out taxes from the employee's pay but they just shoved it in their other pocket. So it became like a discount to hire only illegal immigrants because it was cheaper and you could take out tax money and keep it. And you pay the immigrant cash, so no medical or any other benefits necessary. Its a win, win for business and a total loss for the citizens who were getting poorer every day. Still nothing racist said on my part, notice?

The gig economy, Uber, Lyft, Door Dash, became huge during this time, destroying conventional businesses like taxi/limo and construction/labor, and restaurants by offering a much smaller wage to people who did not know how to run a business or the cost of how to run a business. Long hours for less pay, and no government oversight allowed these businesses to break legal businesses and destroy many more american citizens and, yes, even immigrant families who has already been citizens or had become citizens. Only latinos are not required to become citzens. Companies like Uber and Lyft secretly hired only illegal immigrants and taxi/limos followed suit. One taxi/limo business I worked for actually bounces 3 of every 4 employee pay checks for the past 30 years with no penalty at all, ever, STILL TO THIS DAY! Long hours for less pay, no insurace at all, no benefits, plenty of abuse, and no government oversight. Who you gonna call? Ghost Busters?

A union construction sight I worked on shut down immediately once the white vans of latino illegal immigrants showed up. Once the union rep spoke to the contractor he walked back and told us all, as he blatantly slid an envelpoe into his inside coat pocket for us all to see, to go back to work! We worked along side the illegal immigrants who went from being paid $10 and a bag of rice per day to $50 per hour with $25 per hour in benefits. 30 illegal immigrants replaced 30 american workers that day.

Unmarked white vans were ALWAYS stopped because it was widely known that they transported illegal immigrants for work. The passengers and driver all arrested, and supposedly deported before all this. Then it stopped. Only white unmarked vans though, never black, red, green, or blue, only the white unmarked vans.

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slightlyaboveaverageiq · 9 days

Text

A Black Rose Among Sunflowers (part 3)

“Adrienne!” Jesus Christ who the hell thought it would be a good idea to scream in the ear of someone who had just been beaten I will never understand. My eyes flew open and my hand shot out but instead of making contact with a person it was caught around the wrist by a strong, elegant hand. A strong elegant hand I had spent many hours thinking about and if I’m being honest was the main character in the last two hours of my dreams. Aw hell which means I probably said and did some embarrassing shit which to be fair would not be my fault because he said he would leave when Gabriella got here which she was. Oh. My sister was here, that's probably why they woke me up, no sense in me having sex dreams at an FBI office when I could be having them in the privacy of my older sisters house. I looked first at Spencer who simply raised an eyebrow at my shenanigans and then let my eyes fall to Gabi, who bless her heart looked like she had just seen a ghost and considering how sore I felt I could only imagine how awful I really looked.

“Oh good morning how are you today?” I replied nonchalantly, earning an eye roll from both of them and my sister wiped a few tears off of her cheek before she sat next to me on the couch. She took my hand in hers and gave it a strong squeeze before running her fingers gently over my bruised face and I flinched when she got close to my eye causing her to drop her hand quickly. “I’m sorry.” My voice was barely above a whisper but I know she heard me because a choked sob came out of her throat and I’m sure she thought I was apologizing for being beaten but really I was apologizing for all the times I had hurt her feelings intentionally or unintentionally and making her worry about me.

“Adrienne you dont…don’t apologize for him” Her voice was icy and her tears had quickly dried at any mention or thought of Casey. “What are you doing to find him?” She didn't fully look At Spencer turning just enough so he knew her question was directed at him. He cleared his throat awkwardly and shuffled his weight from side to side hmm so even Doctor Daddy was intimidated by Gabriella. What the hell Addie? Doctor Daddy? All those years reading absolutely filthy books and you couldn’t come up with something better?

“The rest of the team is currently out with local law enforcement looking for him. Someone needed to stay behind with Adrienne, since I was the original officer we felt it would be best if I was the one who stayed.” Oh thank you sweet Spencer for lying through your teeth and not telling my sister how I practically glued myself to your side because then she definitely wouldn’t let me out of her sight. She would be fussing over me day and night and make me talk about my feelings, and be all mushy and stuff. “She's free to go with you whenever you're ready.” The earlier flirtiness was replaced with cold, and indifferent professionalism. Had I completely made up a whole ass scenario in my head? Was he really just going along with my sense of humor just to make me feel at ease? Well that definitely sucked but honestly that's the more likely scenario because he's got to be at least 40 plus he works for the government, and is trying to arrest my ex boyfriend so probably unethical.

“Great let’s go.” I mumbled practically jumping off the couch wanting to put as much distance between myself and Spencer so I could ignore the feeling of embarrassment that was arising within me. They both shared a look as I basically bolted for the door but his hand caught mine and walked me back towards him. He bent down to my ear and I could practically feel the smirk stretch across his face, something Gabriella wouldn’t see thanks to my hair.

“Stop pouting, call me if you need anything.” And just like that boom, he was standing up and the mask of indifference was back on his face and I was standing there like a damn starstruck 16 year old holding a card with his name and number on it. I vaguely registered Gabi thanking him once again and after promising that they would call with any leads she was walking me to her car. She opened the door for me and I silently climbed in and buckled myself feeling another wave of exhaustion washing over me.

“Adrienne…I’m sorry.” She whispered and I frowned at her lifting my head off the window so I could look at her. “I never should have said what I did when you came over to the house. I can’t help but think…maybe if I hadn’t said that, you wouldn't have gone back to your apartment..and Casey wouldn’t have-”

“Stop it. Stop it right now. If I’m not allowed to tell you sorry you aren’t either. It’s not your fault he did what he did, and it's not mine. Casey is responsible for Casey, he hurt me because he wanted to and because he could. That's it.” She seemed startled by my bitter response but I could see the ghost of a smirk on her face. She was proud I was calling Casey out for his shit. Obviously this wasn't the ideal circumstance that would lead to that but beggars can’t be choosers I guess. “Now come on, let's go get some breakfast because I’m starving.” The ride to Lilianna’s was mostly silent thanks to my huge relief because I wasn't even sure what I would say after all of that, there really was nothing to say. What happened happened and nothing was going to change it and all we could do now was sit back and wait for them to catch pussyface.

“Addie!” I felt her hands wrap around me before I saw her face and I hugged her back. Lilianna flinched when she saw my bruised face and I offered her a weak smile. “I’m just so glad Spencer happened to be here, his team had just gotten back from a case. He usually spends a good chunk of time here after landing, I don't think he wants to take that energy into his apartment, I can’t say that I blame him.” Before I could ask any follow up questions on what she meant by certain energy her attention was taken by a customer who was ready to order so Gabi and I sat down at my usual table.

“Oh, before I forget. Dr. Reid said that the officers changed the locks on your apartment, he asked me to give you the new keys.” Gabi rummaged around in her purse before fishing out the set of keys, what I wasn't prepared for was the overwhelming feeling of nausea I had with the memories that came with those sets of keys. She must have noticed my greenish hue because she quickly stuffed them back in her purse. “Of course you can stay with me as long as you want, in fact you don’t ever have to step foot in that hellhole again.” I shook my head and held my hand out for her to give me the keys.

“Only for a week or so, I can’t just stop living my life.” Lilianna came and we placed our orders and ate in silence before making the trip back to her house. Surprisingly Emmett and the twins were gone, I’m sure she talked them into going elsewhere for the day so I could have some peace and privacy. I walked up the staircase to the guest room. I sighed and fell face first onto the navy and yellow comforter not having the energy to stand for any longer. I rolled the keys around in my hand and bit the inside of my cheek debating messaging Spencer just so he had my number and wasn’t completely shocked by some random number asking about Casey Thomas.

It’s Adrienne, thank you for all your help last night and this morning. Plus giving Gabi the new keys there's only so much older sister one can deal with at a time.

I sat my phone on the nightstand and closed my eyes, hugging the pillow to myself as I slid into a light sleep. My aching body combined with the amount of adrenaline that had been running through my veins was starting to wear on me again and I felt like I could just sleep for at least 24 hours if no one bothered me. Thankfully no one did bother me because when I opened my eyes again it was pitch black in the room and outside. I groaned and grabbed my phone hitting the lock button and instantly hating myself for not turning the brightness down, what kind of idiot stares at their phone screen when 1. They have an eye injury and 2. It’s pitch black and they literally just woke up from a coma level nap, oh yeah me. 11:18 pm, well damn I had slept over 14 hours but honestly I needed it. The second thing that caught my attention was a message from an unknown number.

I meant what I said, he won’t touch another hair on your head Addie

-Spencer

Okay, logically I know he’s probably just pissed off some grown ass man who beat a woman. Most men tend to get very angry about that type of thing, but I can’t help but feel like it was a personal threat and promise more than just some general statement said to put me at ease. Luckily my stomach decided to remind me that I had been asleep and it was now moments away from eating itself providing me with a much needed distraction from my imaginative scenarios involving Spencer. I sat my phone down on the bed and quietly patted down the stairs turning on the overhead kitchen light. Gabi's bedroom door was closed and the lights were off so I was guessing she had been asleep a good minute before I woke up. I grabbed some leftover pasta with my name on it and headed back to my guest room so as not to disturb her.

What if he comes back? I know the locks are changed but what's going to stop him from breaking the door down?

I honestly wasn’t expecting an answer as late as it was considering how absolutely wrecked and exhausted Spencer looked whenever I left the office. I turned the tv on and flipped through some channels before settling on some C list horror movie as I shoveled pasta into my mouth. A soft vibration from my side caught my attention and I didnt know if I wanted to smile seeing Spencer's name pop up. On one hand I was surprised he had answered so quickly and I couldn't help the blush that colored my cheeks. On the other hand I was well aware it was after midnight by now and honestly he should be sleeping, I slept all day so I had an excuse to be awake this late.

He won’t, not yet anyway. He knows we're looking for him and as angry as he is with you he values self preservation for more, which is why he ran away instead of looking for you. Most likely he’ll try to reappear after a few months once he thinks your guard is down and you're vulnerable, when we’re using our resources for more recent cases.

-Spencer

Oh gee thanks, I feel safer already

It wasn’t meant to plicate you, it was meant to prepare you without making you overly anxious. Stop pouting I can feel it from here

-Spencer

I rolled my eyes and chucked my phone back into the couch ignoring the text message notification. I get that he has to at least keep the illusion of professionalism so he doesn't get in trouble at work but would it kill him to at least be like no, adrienne everything is going to be fine? No. I would have hated that too because Spencer was right. I would just feel like he was lying to me and telling me what I wanted to hear.

There’s a difference between pouting and having a logical level of fear and wanting to be reassured. But I’m guessing they don’t teach you that in FBI school. God forbid cops have any level of empathy for someone.

I knew my answer was harsh but I was angry, and not at just one person but really this entire fucked up situation and the universe in general. Spencer just happened to be getting the brunt of it because it was late and he was the only person awake, add on the fact he makes me sexually frustrated and that's even more reason to be bratty to him.

Your anger is a fear response often shown by people who don’t like a lack of control. Commonly due to childhood abuse or trauma they couldn't escape and instead of being scared you choose to be angry.

-Spencer

…Shut up

Oh yes Addie because that was definitely a mature response, not even a denial, hell that was practically an admission I had just given him but he was right. I was scared. Scared Casey would come back, scared they wouldn't be able to catch him or protect me.

It’s late Adrienne, go to sleep. And before you even argue, it's 12:30, what are you going to do at 12:30 in the morning?

-Spencer

First of all I’ll have you know I slept until 11 this evening, and secondly myself since no one else is doing it

I stared wide eyed at the screen as he seemed to type for forever, well I said it i can't go back and unsay it now so whatever happens happens I guess. He’ll either find it extremely hilarious and laugh along with me or it will end in me being blocked.

Like I said yesterday, he was not a very good boyfriend then. Go to sleep now Adrienne, it's not up for discussion.

-Spencer

#fanfic #criminal minds #spencer reid #david rossi #jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #smut #dom spencer reid #spencer x reader

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lillylvjy · 5 months

Note

it was about wilm and reader both having internalised homophobia!

both becoming best friends and feeling 'wrong' for the way they feel about the other but it just feels so good...even though they think it's wrong...

cue wilm sleeping over at reader's and asking how to kiss so she 'doesn't embarrass herself the first time she kisses a boy' so reader goes to explain even though she's upset to hear wilma talking about boys like that and wilma bites the bullet and just kisses her! immediately pulling back and apologising while reader is sat in shock because it felt so good and so right even though they were both taught it was so wrong to like other girls like that

Oml give me a minute while I SOB!

I feel like you and Wilm have known each other since you both were little, yet just became friends as highschool started from being in almost all of the same classes. And you always thought she was pretty! She was tall, had long brown hair, brown eyes that complimented everything about her. She was gorgeous.

But soon those thoughts turned more. You wanted more. You wanted to hold her and tell her how pretty she was. Wanted to kiss her face and kiss every scar on her body and worship it. But you didn’t know why, you weren’t supposed to like this. This was bad. Wasn’t it?

And Wilma felt the same, have growing up with parents who pushed religion on her and that being gay and in love with the same gender was a sin and you would go to hell and it terrified her. Especially now when she feel like this. She isn’t supposed to feel like this, she can’t. She really can’t. But why did it feel so right???

So when you asked Wilma if she could spend the night at your house, she immediately said yes. So of course you guys first have snacks and watch a movie bc why not! But than once the movies over and you fall into a comfortable silence, Wilma’s thoughts get the best of her.

Your lips looked pretty, she wants to kiss them and bite them and just look at them. You looked so sweet and soft and she just wanted to hold you and kiss you. Bruise you, mark you as hers. Praise you for Al your worth. Why was she thinking these things?! This is bad.

“Hey, I have a quick question.” Wilma asked as she immediately widened her eyes. Did she just speak?

“Yea what’s up?” You asked as you leant up on your elbows and looked at her with that stupid smile of yours.

“Can you teach me how to kiss? So I’m not like terrible when I kiss a boy?” Wilma quickly made up a lie as her words came out like word vomit.

Your face dropped as you heard those words. Of course that’s all she wanted. She just wants to make sure she can impress someone; a boy. So stupid for you to think you had the chance to be with her. She’s not into girls, she never will be Jesus Christ-

“Um- yeah I can! Uh, what exactly do you need help with?” You asked, placing a smile back on your face as you silently died inside.

“I think just kissing in general.” Wilma said as she looked at her hands.

“Ok, um… so basically just-“

You were cut of by Wilma quickly and gently grabbing your face and pulling it towards hers, placing her lips on yours. Your eyes widened as you realized what was happening, not having enough time to reciprocate as she pulled away.

“I-I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to do that, fuck! Um I can leave-“

Now it as your turn to cut her off, carefully placing your hand on her cheek as you placed your lips back on hers, loving how soft and sweet they were. This time Wilma widened her eyes before reciprocating the kiss. Cupping your face in her hand, she pulled you impossibly closer to her as you moved to straddle her lap, her hands quickly moving to your waist, pulling you chest to chest with her.

Before the kiss could get any deeper, you pulled away for air, Wilma chasing your lips but you placed your hands on her upper chest slowing her down and looking at her.

“So- w- do you like me?” You asked out in the open as you stared at her waiting for an answer.

“I- yeah. I really do. A lot. And I know it’s bad but-“

“Wilm, it’s not bad. We’re conditioned to think it’s bad but it’s not. I promise. We’ll make it. We’ll be ok.” You whispered to her as you placed your forehead on hers, cupping her face as you leant in closer to her,

“We’ll make it.” Wilma said back to you as she placed her lips back on yours.

#sorry this took so long-#thought I posted this yesterday-#lilly’s ask #estrella <3

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therehavebeenstranger · 1 year

Text

I was tagged by @allgremlinart in a "top 5 no-skip albums" tag game! i am very much more an albums person than an artists person and i have strong opinions so i am very excited to write this post :))) these are not in any particular order!

transangelic exodus- ezra furman

let's be clear. this could be pretty much any ezra furman album. there's a world in which this list is just five ezra furman albums*, but i'm trying to be restrained, and while ezra has many no-skip records, this is the one where skipping is going to do you the dirtiest. this genre-hopping, transformative, trans-formative, gorgeous album is furman at her very best. queer rage and fear and joyjoyjoy in this teeming pop AND punk rock album take us on a flight-for-our-queer lives trip across america. angel, i'll be your guardian if you'll be mine. This album has deep personal significance for me in my life as a queer jewish person. it is survival music. love-yourself-or-die music. it took a long long time to find the border of a kingdom of love outside the reigning order. i found my angel on a motorcycle i'm a queer for life outlaw outsider

2. darkness on the edge of town- bruce springsteen

okay. i mean, yeah. i'm a springsteen fan. i like the boss. but i am a springsteen fan in that i am from new jersey. a springsteen fan in that when my parents were first seeing each other, they would meet for dates in the bruce section of a tower records in manhattan; in that my father grew up in monmouth county in the 70s, doing his underage drinking at the stone pony, then became a man who wanted to rock his toddler in the rocking chair before bed but didn't know any lullabyes so used to sing me to sleep with thunder road. i'm a bruce fan in the way i am a brunette--it's hereditary, a happy accident of genetics. my relationship to darkness is a little different. it's the first bruce album i approached on my own and really spent time with, and man, what a place to start. so complete, so fresh, so moving. also, the best and most sensitive queer album ever made by an ostensibly straight man** (in my opinion this album is gay af). i think the song that makes this a no skip is candy's room. after all these heavy guitars, getting shocked with that song, hearing it build is like getting splashed with cold water in a good way. i feel like i don't breathe listening to this album.

3. sunday in the park with george obcr, music and lyrics by stephen sondheim

i am at my most funadamental a musical theater bitch baybee! sorry! deal with it! sunday isn't quite my favorite sondheim*** this is my favorite sondheim recording. man, the music in this show--have you listened to sunday recently? all those voices in perfect harmony (harmony!) as the image comes together. the real delight is listening to patinkin and peters playing off each other--listen to color and light rn! one of my favorite moments in all recorded music is mandy's triumphant "and the care, and the feeling, and the life! moving on!" sunday is my favorite art about making art, and of course this gives us move on, which has the best art making advice in the world: just keep moving on. anything you do let it come from you then it will be true. give us more to see.

4. dogrel- fontaines d.c.

i don't have a long speech about this one. i have listened to some or all of this album at least once a week since it came out in 2019 and i still don't know how to talk about it. it's just fucking perfect. it's perfect. even if we just think about the opener and the closer--how is this an album with both big and dublin city sky on it??????

5. tea for the tillerman-cat stevens

this album is a part of my dna, basically! it's inside my skin! when i was very small, the music playing in my mom's car would always be either the la cage aux folles obcr, jesus christ superstar, or cat stevens (my parents are cool in my opinion! sue me!) and these songs in particular got so deep inside my imagination. they've never let go, nor do i want them to. my childhood was spent wondering what a moonshadow was, and would the faithful eye find me, picturing the frightening world described in where do the children play, or imagining sad lisa's tears, or seeing the father and son arguing, staring out the car window, wishing they could reconcile--knowing somehow that they wouldn't. this album taught me melancholy, but also beauty and mischief and joy--god, the brief burst that is the title song at the very end! magic, every time!

(honorary mentions: contra-vampire weekend, joy as an act of resistance-idles pretty. odd-panic! at the disco (leave me alone) sigh no more-mumford and sons (LEAVE ME EVEN ALONER) pony-orville peck, jesus christ superstar movie soundtrack-webber/rice many others i'll think of later probably)

Thank you to gremlin for the tag! you can probably tell i had a lot of fun with this one. i'm going to tag @danielkahndyke @hopelesslyfree @apocalypse-friend @bruce-wayne-simp and if you guys respond i will pretty certainly be combing your lists for recs (hey hopelessly i will listen to any taylor you put on there back to front even if it's not 1989 😘)

*the full list would be, in no particular order, and only counting full length releases in the post-harpoons era: exodus, year of no returning, day of the dog, twelve nudes, perpetual motion people. all of us flames gets left out bc i still find that it leaves me pretty raw. it's a tough listen for me. this is the furthest thing from a critique.

**to me, this album is fundamentally about being queer and strange and from new jersey and having a dad. to me.

***attend the fuckin tale, baby...or go into the woods. or...have company over? or, or... i like sondheim

#ezra furman #bruce springsteen #stephen sondheim #fontaines d.c.#cat stevens #vampire weekend #idles #mumford and sons #panic at the disco #andrew lloyd webber #orville peck

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romantic-reveries · 9 months

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Well, I got scolded for the first time at work today, and really, the timing couldn’t be worse considering how much I’ve hated everything lately anyway.

I couldn’t stop crying. I still feel like I could cry at a moment’s notice. And it wasn’t even fair what I was yelled at about anyway.

These people are fucking weird, and working with a family is the worst. I mean, I’m sure there are worse jobs. But it’s not even the job I dislike—it’s them. I actually like the job. But they make me not want to do it, not want to help. To do the bare minimum, take my paycheck and go.

I stepped into the office today to grab the wife (my manager) to ask her something, not thinking anything of it. It wasn’t that important, but I also didn’t realize I had restricted times of asking them things. I whispered her name to get her attention. She very aggressively “shh”’d me, as if I’d been loud, and then came out and basically said to never come in there when her husband is in a meeting. Which is fair, but I wasn’t trying to talk to him, anyway. She was in there doing her makeup.

She tells me then that it’s not the first time I’ve interrupted him in a meeting and that it’s very rude, which is wild, because I’m not the kind of person who does things like that because it IS rude? I tell her I haven’t and she insists I have, and then she’s like “and another thing, don’t argue with me when I correct you on something because this isn’t the first time you’ve done that, either” like — Jesus fucking Christ, then open your mouth and say something instead of exploding at me?

Like, it wouldn’t have even been so bad if she’d just been like “don’t ever go in there when he’s on a call” and I would’ve said I was sorry and I didn’t know, but it went from “never do that, and another thing, you constantly interrupt us when we’re busy and it’s rude, and then you argue with me when I correct you” and like, fuck. You really jumped from 0 to 100 and bit my head off for no reason.

But I can only think of one incidence each for both of her assertions. He has meetings every Monday morning and I’ve never once interrupted one of those because I know they’re happening, but I think I may have interrupted him once when he was talking with someone in the middle of a day. His office was open—how was I supposed to know? And I asked quietly if he was busy. It’s not like I just barged in and started asking things. I had no one else to go to, so I HAD to go to him. Frankly, he intimidates me and I only talk to him if I don’t have a choice.

And the only couple things I can think of where she’s ever “corrected” me was once when they left early, the husband told me to write in 6 on my time card, which put me at overtime for the week. It didn’t reflect on my hours, so I asked about it, and she told me that he said I must’ve “misunderstood” what he said which was so condescending and I know I didn’t. Maybe I misunderstood the sentiment (which was that they weren’t going to cut my hours short because they were leaving early), but it’s also like, they weren’t even paying but probably like $9 of overtime. Just fucking pay it. It’s not even about the money, it’s the principle of it.

Meanwhile, I accidentally saw the brother’s emails once when I was working at his desk, and he’d told our accounting lady to give his sister 40 hours even though she’s been on maternity leave since like… May? Early June? Most women don’t get that much maternity leave pay, it’s only because she’s their kid. Which is fine, I get them prioritizing family, but they’re so blatant over it.

And the other time, she told me if anyone calls for her husband to just take a message, and she got a little heated and went on a diatribe about how if he answered for everyone who called him he’d “never know a moment’s peace” (it’s called: being a business owner—sorry he chose to take over mommy and daddy’s business and makes lots of money doing so), but I didn’t contradict her in any way, I just didn’t know to do that because no one had told me. It felt like she was yelling at me over it, but I knew it wasn’t my fault because how could I have known? I just brushed it off. But I certainly didn’t ARGUE with her over it.

Anyway, I started crying because she was just like… so over the top about it. Absolutely snapped at me. And she felt bad for making me cry and then she said it was on her for not saying something sooner, because she’d meant to, but things get busy, blah blah blah, which made me feel worse because apparently it’s been weeks? And then she’s trying to tell me it’s not me and it’s not anything I’m doing wrong (???) and part of the reason she didn’t want to say anything was because she didn’t want me to feel like I COULDN’T come to them, because that’s what they’re there for.

So you’re here to help me, and you want me to come to you, and she insists she WON’T get mad (except that’s what she just did?), but she’s just explained to me that I shouldn’t ever interrupt them if they’re doing something else ??? That I’ve interrupted them with customers (literally ONLY ever either because I’M with a customer and have a question, or because one of our delivery people has called and needs someone like, now) so like??? And it’s like, they’ll close the door to his office all the time. That’s a pretty strong signal to not interrupt unless you really need something, so why not close it during his meetings? Or she could choose to do her makeup out here, in case she’s needed? It’s just fucking crazy to act like I’M the problem there?

It’s like they hired me as admin/sales, but I don’t even know why, because they won’t really let me sell. I’m just supposed to take overflow. And even if I was full time sales, their daughter will eventually come back, and we almost never get enough traffic to warrant having four salespeople. And there are just so many like, unspoken rules they think I’m supposed to know, and of course they know because they’re family, so she gets upset at me for not knowing but how could I???

As far as sales goes, it’s like, I’m only supposed to take a customer if the mom and son are already with customers, but sometimes they’re just busy or unaware or whatever, and am I just supposed to ignore that someone is wandering around? We don’t have a store big enough to have the luxury of letting them wander. They can get through the whole store and leave in two minutes flat.

So whatever, it’s fine. I just won’t try that hard anymore. I’m here for a paycheck and nothing more. If they wanna be lazy and not cross their T’s and dot their I’s, I’m not gonna double check things anymore and do it for them. I’ll ignore customers even if one of them is in the back or something. They can hear the door just as well as I can. This is their business, not mine. I’ll do what’s asked of me and not a drop more.

#personal

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emmaxjo · 2 years

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a rainy day

pairing: eddie munson x female reader

warnings: dom!eddie, teasing, unprotected sex, rough blowjob, choking, multiple orgasms, smut

plot: “i” is helping dustin out, joining a game of d&d, not knowing exactly how big of a “freak” eddie munson is;)

NO COPYING!

summer break just started. it was hot and windless. I just joined “the hellfire club” because my little brother Dustin basically begged me to do it. apparently his friend Lucas ‘dumped’ him and now he needed a new member to join his friend Mike, the other members of hellfire, and of course the leader.. Eddie Munson.

I didn’t know much about Eddie. he was known as the town‘s freak which didn’t seem to bother him. it wasn’t because I wanted to know more about him anyway. he had been at my house a couple of times before, to hang with Dustin, but i’ve always just stayed in my room. the one time i ever had a conversation with him was when i joined a smoke circle, and he (of course) was there.

anyways.

the game night was tonight. i wouldn’t say i looked forward to it, but I guess it would be nice to finally do something, since I spent the last few days in bed, feeling depressed.

well maybe I should get dressed. there was only one hour till I had to walk to the school, where the game night was being held.

i threw a hoodie on top of my red bra, and then put on a black skirt, since all my pants were in the washing machine. I hadn’t got the hellfire shirt yet, because it was at the school. I figured I would just leave early, so I could change there.

I left early and as i arrived at school, i noticed it had never been more quiet. I let myself in of one of the unlocked doors and found the d&d room. I opened the door to a dark room. I went inside and found the locker with the shirts. luckily my size was easy to find. as I pulled off my hoodie I heard the door swing open. I panicked trying to pull the hoodie off my head, as I heard a voice say

“Jesus H. Christ!”

as I finally got it off, trying to cover my boobs with my hands, I realised who it was. It was Eddie Munson standing in front of me.

“you need help with that?” he smirked.

“fuck off perv” i hissed back at him, quickly grabbing the hellfire shirt and putting it on.

“oh, is it really my fault you’re stripping in the open?” he said, still with a smile on his face.

“would be your first time watching a girl naked, i assume” i rolled my eyes back at him.

he grinned; “well princess, i would love to chat with you, but i actually have a game to prepare”

as he walked up to the table in the middle of the room, lighting up the candles.

i walked up to the table, as the door swung open and Dustin and the others came inside. “you guys already here?” Dustin asked surprised. “yup, can we please just get started” i shrugged.

the game took an hour to complete. even though I’ve never played it before, I learned fast and was able to play pretty good, even though I didn’t do much for the team. and to be honest Eddie was a great leader. he really made it sound fun. it was kind off…. hot? even though i would never admit that.

as people began to leave it was just me and Eddie in the room again.

“are you not gonna head home?” he said.

“yeah, but it just began raining, and i have to walk, so i’m just gonna wait a little” i shrugged, as i looked at the rain falling outside of the only little window in the room.

“i’ll drive you home” Eddie said, getting closer.

“no you really don’t have to do that” i turned around, realising he was just inches away from me.

“come on, it’s my pleasure” he smirked.

i shrugged; “fine” and began walking towards the door.

we walked to his car together, quickly getting inside, as it began to pour.

as he sat down in the driving seat, he said; “listen i’m sorry about earlier, i really didn’t realise you were in there” he looked me in the eyes.

“it’s okay, i shouldn’t have changed there” i grabbed his arm to confirm it was fine. he looked at the place my hand was placed and back in my eyes.

he suddenly moved forward.

“hey!” i yelled, as i pulled back.

“shit, i’m so sorry, your lips looked so kissable” he said looking at my lips once again. i stared at him for a few seconds, then i quickly grabbed the back of his head, pulling him in again.

our teeth crashed together and our lips met in a wet kiss. he began kissing me down my neck till he came to my shirt.

“let’s get rid of this, shall we” he looked up with a smirk. i quickly pulled the shirt of my head, exposing my red bra. “naughty little princess” he said, quickly digging in, leaving hickeys all over my boobs. i moaned as he moved up to my shoulder, leaving a bite mark.

he stopped, looked at me and then suddenly grabbed my waist, throwing me unto the back seats. he quickly unlocked his belt as i was gasping for air. as he pulled down his pants, his aching cock slapped back at his stomach. it was already dripping with precum. i gasped at the length. he smirked.

“don’t think it’ll fit princess? that’s fine. i’ll make it” he said moving closer to me. “but first.. let’s see what that mouth can do” he grasped my hair and yanked all of his length inside my mouth, till it reached the back of my throat. i almost gagged, but managed to keep it together.

he began moving back and forth, getting more aggressive with each pull.

“fuck” he moaned, as he already felt a warm feeling, meaning he was about to cum.

he began mouthfucking me even harder, till he finally bursted into my mouth.

he then pulled out, watching my wrecked face swallowing the liquid.

“good girl” he smirked. “now let’s see how tight that pussy of yours really is” he said pulling my skirt off. he stared at my body as i laid almost naked on the seats. “fuck, already so wet for me?” he said pulling off my drenched panties.

he stroke his finger up my slit, and into his mouth, getting a taste of my juices. as he sucked off his finger he began rubbing my clit, making me squirm. my head fell back, and a moan slipped my lips as he began going faster. “feels good?” he grinned. i nodded. “use your words princess” he said rubbing even faster. “fuck!.. ye-yes Eddie” i moaned. as i felt it getting tighter, knowing i was about to cum. he suddenly stopped. i moaned as i shot my head back up, reaching to finish myself off. “ah ah slut. did i tell you, you could cum?” he said grabbing my arm hard. “Eddie please” i begged. he smirked, feeling his cock grow again. “you cum, when i tell you to cum” he said beginning to rub my clit again. my head shot back once again, as the pleasure washed over me. as i felt it getting tighter again, he suddenly stopped and quickly pushed his cock in me. i screamed, as my pussy took his whole length. “fuck.. so fucking tight just for me” Eddie moaned. he began pulsing back and forth, as he watched me moan in pleasure. he quickly grabbed my throat, squeezing. “you don’t want anyone to hear us, do you princess?” he said. as i felt my walls getting tighter yet again, Eddie realised and smirked. “cum for me princess” he said. i let go, drenching his dick in my juices. “fuck baby.. i’m getting close.. where do you want it” he moaned. “i’m on the pill” i smirked. he looked at me, realising just how much of a naughty girl i was. finally he came in me, still pulsing, letting it drip out of my pussy. he fell down on me, let out an exhausted moan, while grabbing my thigh to hold. the rain was getting louder now. there were fog covering the inside of the windows, not allowing people to look inside. Eddie tapped my leg, with my head on his chest, now switched to laying beneath me. “so when is the next d&d game?”

#eddie munson #eddie munson fic #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x reader #fan fiction #smut #eddie munson x female reader #stranger things #stranger things smut

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sierrabinondo · 4 months

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2023

jesus christ. lmao

well.

real quick- i'm basically never posting the link to these again. either people know where to find them or they don't. i think it's better that way.

for the first week of this year i had only one eye. i had poked my eyeball with my wire brush and couldn't open it without experiencing excruciating pain for days. i think that dumb little injury- unfortunate, yet kinda funny- really set the tone for 2023.

the first few months i was essentially in hibernation. we were hard at work tracking vocals on the with sails ahead record well into april, technically may too. we ran into so many setbacks- joe got sick, then i got sick (or vice versa???), one night i had a really bad crying spell and stayed home, sometimes shit just came up- it was incredibly difficult. and we were losing our minds feeling like this record was taking forever to get done. five nights a week spent tracking vocals, sometimes doing upwards of 60 takes (sry joe) to get my takes as perfect as possible. it was fucking. tough. and there's still things i wish i could have done differently, but we got it done.

it's kind of angering to think about how i've gotten better as a vocalist even in the time since, and i wish i could apply what i've learned to the record. but that just means that the songs will sound even better live, which will be awesome. i'm still proud of a lot of the work i did on the record.

at the end of the day, spending all that time making an album was the best possible use of my time. i don't regret it at all. i wish i could have streamed, but it's okay.

that truly was my life from january to april. i did dry january and it went well so i'm doing it again in 2024. i think i managed to extend it into most of February. the goal is to also continue it for as long as possible or generally abstain from alcohol more since WSA will be so busy. we went to shows here and there, and when we did hang out we got together at joe's since we had already been working. but that was really it. i finally got a new tattoo, which was the digimon sword piece i had been dying to get forever. i got to go to the new kura location in edison, too.

april happened. and then may was also a month.

june was an exceptionally busy month, and in that time we went on tour for WC3. three weeks prior, ryan had to bow out of the run due to an injury and we were SO fucking lucky that cha could step in last-minute. with all things considered, we played well on tour. as weepy and fucked up in the head as i was, that was one of my favorite weeks of this year, and one of my favorite memories. there's a longer, more detailed recap below so i won't go into exacts. but being around my friends all week was bliss.

in june, i also started taking muay thai classes. i had always wanted to go back to taking martial arts classes in some way, shape or form but i didn't think it would happen this soon. i thought maybe in my mid-30's i'd start, but it just worked out that i could start going now. i didn't start prior due to budget and time restraints but, i moved closer to my friends' gym, so i could finally go train. i knew it was going to be way different from cardio kickboxing, but understanding *some* of those fundamentals helped me at least have half a foot forward when i began training. it's taking me so long to absorb everything since i can only go once a week, but it has been fucking awesome. there was one class where emily and i were just throwing each other around on the mat, and it was a blast. not only has it been really fun and incredible to learn, but i have become closer with my friends sean and emily, and made a new friend in our classmate kim. they've all been a tremendous help in getting me through this year; probably more than they'll ever know.

god every month this year was so busy. early july, we finally filmed our music videos for the record and played a couple gigs. the month absolutely flew by. shooting the videos was a blast, and the two fests we played were very fun. sadly, in the midst of those two gigs, i was living a fucking nightmare. any sane person would cancel the shows and all of their obligations but i decided not to. i probably would have been better off for it, but i felt like playing the shows and being around my friends was better than being at home and mourning never seeing my dog again. but in july, i also returned to streaming, and it was so bittersweet going live again. since then, it's been difficult to maintain the schedule i once had, but i'm just so fucking grateful and glad that my community is still here. they didn't go anywhere. and i really don't care if i grow at the moment, because if they keep coming back that's all that matters. they are what makes continuing to stream worth it or even enjoyable at all. it's so much fun.

in august, WSA decided to start giving a shit about tiktok and meeting at joe's to do bits. we had the WC3R weekender, so we figured it was a good time to start getting into the swing of posting. if we want to grow at all, we have to. it really helped with promoting our shows. when we went on the weekender later that month, we got to see detroit and chicago for the first time. i am so blessed to be able to travel with my best friends and see cool shit. we also meet the most wonderful people and get to see longtime friends on the road, many of which we maintained contact with online only. i never hesitate to reassure people that tour is grueling, but it is so fucking rewarding.

the summer overall was awesome. spent a lot of time with friends new and old, longboarded, went to a food festival, spent a lot of time in brooklyn and philly. I SAW TWICE LIVE, FINALLY. top 3 best concerts of all time, it might rival the on letting go 10 year for #1. saw my childhood best friend get married and enjoyed a trip with my family to north carolina. SHOUTOUT ABARI VIDEO GAME BAR IN CHARLOTTE. because of emily, i also got to go to the beach so much!!! girl hooked it up with free badges!! and that was something i really wanted to make sure i didn't miss out on this year. i was sad the summer ended so early, but it was a good one.

when september came, it was like a break before the final arc of the year began. i still had to haul ass and get band stuff done, otherwise i took it a little easier. my month kicked off with a trip to the DMV, which was incredible. the barbeque at adam's was awesome, and i had a blast living with kevin and caleb for a week. it felt wrong to leave to be honest LMAOOOO. i am so grateful to them for their hospitality. basically when i crash there i live in their basement lmao and i work remotely!! and it totally all works out! then we hang really hard at night. karaoke at queen's gambit was. god. just one of the most perfect nights out i have ever had. and even the nights where we didn't do much, it was wonderful. later that month was my birthday, for which my plans got hella derailed due to the storm, but my friends who are local still came which i'm so grateful for. we partied hard and sang karaoke for hours. i wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

being single is fucking weird, but i'm mostly used to it now. it's nice to get attention but i rarely feel like actually into anyone. and when i do, it's not reciprocated. also! being on dating apps is fucking weird! i got on them because i was craving physical intimacy but since then i've only gone on one date. that was just two days ago. people are just so weird. i really tried to connect with both men and women- i don't even want anything serious- but people just stop answering. thankfully, i really didn't get discouraged over it at all. i'm not gonna lie, i also just would stop answering people i was initially interested in. it just sucks so much. it's hard to feel anything, even excitement. but i guess i also don't really take it seriously. hence my insane prompt answers lmao

october through december was basically 9 seconds. mostly because of us dropping new music. i spent october scrambling to get everything ready, november was all about darting, then prepping for the rest of the album shit we need and filming content in december. i finally got to see ciara again since we met in LA!! we showed her around philly and jersey. i finally got to see steph and her family, regretfully for the first time in a long time. i'm pretty sure i was there the month prior then went back for brian's birthday. it's been harder for us to get time in together, but hanging out with steph is always just like picking up where we left off, no matter how long it's been. i went to a really fun wedding halloween weekend, and got to cosplay ann tamaki for halloween this year, which is like the 2nd faithful cosplay i've done since going blonde haha. bea kind of counts but not really? i didn't wanna chop my hair or wear a wig so. oops.

november flew. all i had on my mind was darting eyes. we wished there was a more explosive response, but we're still insanely proud of what we achieved. it was cool to see everyone's reactions and have people be really hype about it. i felt proud to see people say it's our best song yet. i think it's up there with some of the sickest shit we've written. i also went back to kevin and caleb's to chill with them for their birthdays and to go see daoboys in baltimore. i would love to make that a yearly trip provided that we're both free that week of november. also i cringe when i think about how i fucked up when i mic grabbed for daoboys BUT it was still an awesome experience and i'm so lucky i can say that i got invited to do that at all.

when december came, i was not feeling festive at all. even on christmas eve, i woke up feeling more normal about it than ever. i've never listened to so little christmas music in my life. it was a really tough month. i missed brawly so badly. but my friends were glad to hang out and do festive shit with me, which helped so much. on christmas, it was just me and my family, no one else, and it was really lovely. it's become one of my top favorite christmases ever.

this year was tough for many reasons most likely obvious, but for a long time i resented being alone with myself. i ran from it as a kid. if i was left out of plans with friends, i would feel sorry for myself instead of dusting my shoulders off and practicing my instruments. and i definitely still did that - but i could have done more, and channeled less negative energy from it. but i ended up doing so much, spontaneously, on my own. and i'm so proud of myself for it. it took time, but i accept what has happened to me and i feel myself ready for a clean slate. i'm definitely just not ready for a relationship yet. i realized yesterday that i'm emotionally unavailable, still. i need more time. getting older sucks but, i'm not too worried about being alone for a little longer at all.

and doing those things alone is totally self care too. speaking of which. I TOOK SO MANY BATHS THIS YEAR. shoutout to my parents' jacuzzi tub. that mf is fam forreal,,,,,, i have a whole set up lmao i throw in a bath bomb, some bubbles, sometimes i grab a mask or some wine, and i throw on anime. it's so therapeutic but one time i got lightheaded from being in there too long so i have to be careful hahaha. i'm grateful to my parents for allowing me to use it so much.

i spent...... so much time with my family and friends this year. i don't remember the last time i have hung this hard with them. our family's bond has taken a completely different shape now that we're all adults, and it's become so much deeper. not only did we go through the breakup together, but losing our cats. i can be a pain in the ass for them all still, which i need to work on, but things are much better now than they have been in the past.

i got so much closer with my bandmates. we hung out way more as best friends, not just to write music and film bits. my lifelong best friends immediately took me under their wing when shit initially hit the fan in april and they haven't let go since. what i went through made me develop an even deeper connection to friends i wished i got to spend more time with. and i just. i had been conditioned to believe for so long that i didn't truly deserve many things, but i no longer have any reason to believe that because of the people who choose to be in my life. i really have such incredible family and friends. i always joke that i didn't ask to be born and shit, but i got the luckiest draw when it comes to the company i have. not that i don't give myself credit for enduring what i had to go through, but i would have been fucked without the support system i have. i am truly so thankful every day.

god i can barely get through finishing this post without crying!!!!

when we went out to dinner recently, my friend asked us what we learned this year. i couldn’t answer because i didn’t even know where to start. i took some time to think about it, and it’s unfortunately a lot. but, here is what i learned in 2023:

what i thought was love was really attraction, and even comfort. those things are still important in a healthy context, but real love is respect- respecting your partner enough to recognize when you’re hurting them and crossing boundaries repeatedly. and a real apology is not repeating that hurtful behavior. it’s not just words, and it’s not blaming others for your mistakes. it’s action. this goes for friendships, too.

believe the things someone says when they’re livid at you. it’s not that those awful things are true, but they are an accurate reflection of how they feel about you. i am so mad at myself for not seeing this glaring red flag probably upwards of a couple dozen times. I challenged these words and i was still reassured those angry sentiments were meaningless. it all adds up now.

take people at face value. don’t try to prove them wrong about themselves. act as if who they are right now is the way they’ll be forever. that was so fucking hard for me as someone who has always largely believed in people’s propensity to change. my therapist really really tried to drill this into my head when i started seeing her in may. it was tough to follow the first time and it didn’t finally stick until the second time i made the mistake of not listening in september. i had to abandon being a fixer. the second time i was challenged in this way this year, i didn’t so much as try to fix them, but i was praying they weren’t right about the terrible things they were telling me about themselves. i wanted them to prove me wrong. i had to come to terms with the fact that because of their commitment to believing they were no good, and not respecting boundaries, we were not going to work out. i truly believed i could love people into being better. i thought giving grace would inspire them to want more for themselves. it is physically impossible.

it is so much better to keep your mouth shut about your personal life. as someone who has always been an open book and worn her heart on her sleeve, this has been extremely difficult for me (lmao). firstly, there’s no need to prove yourself to people who are committed to not empathizing with you. not even reacting or telling the objective truth will help, because they will be dead set on denial. it fuels their disdain. second, the reality is, even some (maybe most!) people who care about you will not understand exactly what you’re going through, and how all-encompassing it feels. and it’s not ok to word vomit about your trauma all the time. unless the offer is extended, it’s best to journal everything and use tools like therapy. i am so glad i have songwriting for this. i just had such great cognitive dissonance that i couldn’t even trust myself, and that's why i couldn't shut the fuck up in/on private lmao. i constantly found myself questioning reality and seeking validation. i couldn’t conceive what the fuck was happening to me nor place how i was supposed to feel. i felt tremendous, overwhelming guilt and grief. a part of me died. we all make jokes about gaslighting, but the psychological torment is no joke.

i made a little change where i stopped calling myself stupid and i legitimately felt a small improvement in my mental health. i highly recommend actually speaking kinder to yourself. there are other insults i should stop using towards myself but that alone felt like a positive step in the right direction.

i believed i wasn’t being held back and that it was all in my head, but staying in a place where i was being emotionally and verbally abused was not only worsening my anxiety but my physical health. i went no contact, and i could even breathe better. sleep better. i used to experience acid reflux daily and now it’s on an occasional basis. I am lonely sometimes, and i am still grieving somewhat, but i feel so much better. it’s incredible.

and now i’m so fucking mad that i accepted less than i deserved for so, so long. i am so mad that i held myself back from being truly happy. even being in a better situation mentally for the last decade might have meant i would have been farther along in my goals. now that i understand how fucked my mental health was that entire time, and how it ruined my self-perception, i feel such a well of emotions when staring ahead at the rest of my life. i have no fucking idea what it looks like. in april there was a dark, deep precipice. now, it’s a little less steep, but it’s there. sometimes it’s not. i am fucking terrified of what comes next, but at the same time i wonder how much i can affect by legitimately believing in myself and having zero mental hindrances. what if i can actually will all of my dreams into reality. after what i experienced this year, i feel like i have nothing to lose, now. so if i'm a little delusional in 2024 i'm sorry lmao. i am only this young for so long!!! and i am hellbent on trying to have as incredible of a year as i can. but if it's anything like 2023, without all of the bad, it certainly will be.

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foxstens · 2 years

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had my first run-in with the janissaries

basically i went through every area i could access to get all the treasure chests i had been avoiding bc they were guarded n stuff. and all of them were easy, like four were in a huge restricted area that literally had two guards lmao, but there’s this one. it’s in a camp, the only camp ive come across in this game, and there’s like 50 guards around it

most of them are janissaries, who are... the most annoying enemy ive come across in this series. like i knew they’d be hard based on their description and what i’ve read about them but holy fuck i did not expect to be this bad at fighting them. they can block or counter or dodge every attack you have, they can either combo-hit you or shoot you, and they take a million years to die bc it’s so hard to find an opening. oh and in this case there’s no way to just fight them one by one.

they’re also quite resistant to the crossbow and the hidden gun, like a few enemies in this game, and they take like 3 shots form either to die. the only way to one-shot them is via poison or arrow storm. idk how well bombs work since i suck at using them and you can’t snipe them from the roof bc this is a pretty big open camp.

in my panic i ended up calling a few assassins and thankfully none of them died but it was close. taunt doesn’t exist in this game so you can’t disarm them like the papal guards, and apparently the best ways to kill them are via counter steal??? which is pretty complicated and im too slow to use it, or via air assassination which im also too slow for. i dont think they show up in other places but i think there’s a mission involving them and this camp which is. scary. i mean i guess i could go there and just practice them or smth but i feel underleveled for it. id like to get more stuff and more experience with the bombs before i do that

i feel like there isn’t too much to do in this game yet, ive just been running around getting money renovating buildings lowering my awareness rinse and repeat, and also recruiting any troubled citizens i came across. i’ve managed to recruit pretty much everyone that showed up on my map apart from one particular guy because its a race

and races are still fucking impossible jesus fucking christ its not even hard but EZIO JUST JUMPS ALL OVER THE PLACE EVEN WHEN MY FINGERS ARE WORKING CORRECTLY AND ITS SO FUCKING ANNOYING JEHSUGDJUSJDUG

i am glad i checked it out tho bc there’s a small cutscene before the race starts and holy shit have i mentioned i love ezio. ohhhhhh my god i love ezio in this game. HE’S SO GREAT WHAT THE HECK. like hes always been great but hes so. hes so mature now. hes so calm. i keep saying that but its true g o d. AND HIS VOICE I CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE HIS VOICE AND HOW IT CHANGES THROUG HTHE GAMES.

the combat and movement does feel pretty wonky at times like the secondary weapon just doesnt work sometimes for some reason i cant figure out and it takes a million years to stand up if i happen to fall, which i dont rmr if it was the same in brotherhood bc i never fell, and 99% of the time i just can’t break out of grabs even if i do what the prompt is telling me. its worked twice before and i was doing the exact same thing i always try to do so most of the time i just stand there and get stabbed.

which is why im still not making the most of the combat system and i prefer using coward strats and killing everything from the rooftops or with the arrow storm. i also still don’t understand how purchasing bombs works, like i had three types of bombs then i bought like 4 from the guy but i ended up only having two?? i think the stuff you buy from him can only take up one slot, so if you buy four types of bombs you’ll end up with the last one you purchased. but it’s not clear which slot they each go into and you also aren’t told what they do unless you go into the database and check it out???

roughly half of them seem useless since they can affect civilians or im just never in a situation where they’d be useful, and i feel like using them takes too much thinking and time because half the time i just can’t deploy them when i need to. switching weapons is also so fucking annoying since now have two weapon wheels and i gotta hit a button to switch to the second wheel and /then/ i gotta use the mouse to actually move the arrow to the weapon i want bc rebinding the controls makes the selection skip items. wasnt an issue before whne there was only one wheel but now its annoying bc bombs. also the crossbow is a primary weapon now and i hate.

still having a great time with the game i just hate the moments when all the issues with the controls make it harder than its supposed to be. im kind of itching for another hidden tomb now eh

#my posts #gameblogging #liveblogging ac #read more #my rambles #my rants #animanga #liveblogging #animeblogging

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lesfeldickbiblestudy · 2 years

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Through the Bible with Les Feldick LESSON 1 * PART 2 * BOOK 50 Our High Priest - Part 2 Hebrews 6:11 – 7:19 Alright, now let’s go right into where we left off in Hebrews in the last lesson. I ran out of time and didn’t get to finish chapter 6 the way I wanted to, and so for just a moment or two before we go into chapter 7, let’s go back to chapter 6. Let me put a few more comments on verse 20. Getting back to that word "forerunner." Hebrews 6:20 "Whether the forerunner (the captain or the Author of our salvation, Jesus the Christ ) for us entered, even Jesus, made an high priest for ever after the order of Melchisedec." Remember, for those of us in this Age of Grace, we are in a totally different scenario than Israel was in Christ’s earthly ministry. And so I’m going to bring you back to I Corinthians chapter 4 where Paul makes a statement that a lot of people don’t like. But when people say, "Well I follow Jesus," then that’s making a pretty strong statement. And I don’t say it to be superfluous or anything like that, but I always put it this way. If you’re going to follow Jesus, what are you going to do when He comes to the shore of the Sea of Galilee and keeps going?" You can’t follow Him. You can’t walk on water. And the same way with a lot of things that He did in His earthly ministry. But, here we have the Apostle of the Gentiles, the Apostle Paul, who never, never attempts to take the place of Christ in anything. In fact, that’s all Paul suffered for for twenty-five years, was to lift up the name of Jesus Christ. But here he says in I Corinthians chapter 4 verse 16, and take this to heart because, after all, all of our doctrines for this Age of Grace come from the pen of this Apostle. That doesn’t mean, as I’ve said over and over on this program; we don’t throw the Old Testament away. You don’t throw out the Four Gospels, and you don’t throw away the book of Revelation or any of that. But when it comes to basic doctrines for us in this Age of Grace, Paul is the Apostle for the Gentiles. So he says, in verse 16: I Corinthians 4:16 "Wherefore I beseech you, (I beg you) be ye followers (he doesn’t say of Jesus, but of who?) of me." Alright, now what does he mean by that? To pick that up you’ve got to turn and look at another verse. This should make it easier to swallow - I Corinthians 11 verse 1 where again the admonition is: I Corinthians 11:1 "Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ." So it stands to reason that the Apostle is not taking anything away from Christ’s leadership or from the fact that He is the Captain of our salvation. But you want to remember that as Paul came in, he too was the "head of the line" of lost sinners saved by grace as he made so plain: I Timothy 1:16 "That in me (Paul) first, Jesus Christ might shew forth all longsuffering, for a pattern to them which should hereafter believe on him to life everlasting." Since Paul was the first (and a pattern for the Church), we’d better pay attention to the instructions that he gives for salvation. Our Lord used Paul to write these great doctrines of Grace based on the finished work of the Cross. And so, since he is the one to whom all these things were revealed, you see, this is why the Holy Spirit inspired him to write, "be ye followers of me." Paul is the one who has truth for this day and age. Now then, let’s just finish verse 20 and get ready for chapter 7. Hebrews 6:20 "Wherefore the forerunner…" The Lord Jesus Himself is the One Who opened it up and as most of you know when the darkness fled and Christ gave up the ghost there back in the crucifixion, what happened to the veil at the Temple? Well, it was rent in twain. Not from the bottom up where men could have done it, but from the top down, showing that it was an act of God. Well this is all tied together, that as He opened up the veil and we are now given access into the very throne room of God, but we do it through the teachings of the Apostle Paul who was our particular leader as a member of the human race.

Alright chapter 7 verse 1, as we come back to Melchisedec. I say back to Melchisedec because we mentioned Him back in chapter 5. Let’s look at those verses beginning with verse 9. Hebrews 5:9-10 "And being made perfect, (or totally complete. He brought everything to fruition) he became the author (there’s that word again instead of Captain) of eternal salvation unto all them that obey him; 10. Called of God, an high priest after the order of Melchisedec." But, then we drop Melchisedec, as not another word is spoken throughout all of chapter 6 or the rest of chapter 5 until we get to chapter 7. Now why? Well, next verse in Hebrews 5 verse 11 tells us. These people were not ready for any teaching concerning Melchisedec. They were too unspiritual. They were still babes in Christ. They couldn’t comprehend this priesthood of Melchisedec, and I imagine that’s most of church people today. Most people haven’t got a clue as to this priesthood of Melchisedec. And who he was and what he accomplished. And here’s the reason: Hebrews 5:11 "Of whom (he says) we have many things to say, and hard to be uttered, seeing you are dull of hearing." They weren’t ready for anything concerning Melchisedec. And then he goes on and he brings them to task, that even though they should have by now had enough handle on all of these things to go out and teach others, could they? No. No, they couldn’t teach anybody, they didn’t know it themselves. So, everything down through here and then all the problems that we covered with those who were apostate up in chapter 6 and all these other things, he had to bring them down to the place where we just finished now in chapter 6 that they now understood. They now understood that the way into the Holiest of all had been opened up because of what Christ had accomplished on the Cross. And so now then, if we understand that much, hopefully, we’re ready to study Melchisedec. Now that’s the way I have to look at it. All of a sudden, because they were carnal believers and still on milk, Paul had to drop the subject of Melchisedec in chapter 5, until he got to the end of chapter 6, and hopefully they are becoming more mature, and getting there, and ready to understand about Melchisedec. Now let’s look at chapter 7 verse 1. Hebrews 7:1a "For this Melchisedec, king of Salem, priest of the most high God,…" Now if you don’t mind marking your Bible, underline those three words. The "most high God." Hebrews 7:1b "…who met Abraham returning from the slaughter of the kings, and blessed him; 2. To whom also Abraham gave a tenth part of all; first being by interpretation King of righteousness, and after that also King of Salem, which is, King of peace;" Which means in the Hebrew ‘Shalom,’ he was the King of peace. Let’s go back and pick all that up in Genesis chapter 14. Here we will be introduced for the first time to this high priest of the most high God. In the Hebrew I think it was El Elyon. Now, we’re going to take this rather slowly because, like Paul indicates, you can’t understand these things concerning Melchisedec if you don’t have a pretty good handle on mature spiritual things. Genesis 14:17-18 "And the king of Sodom went out to meet him (that is Abraham) after his return from the slaughter of the Chedorlaomer, (who had invaded Sodom and Gomorrah and had taken Lot and all of his family with them) and the kings that were with him, at the valley of Shaveh which is the king’s dale. Remember Abraham is coming back having been victorious, and had rescued Lot and his family. Genesis 17:18 And Melchizedek king of Salem (The King of Peace, which of course are the last letters of the city of Jerusalem, and would be the city of Jerusalem in a later day) brought forth bread and wine: and he was the priest of the most high God." Now the most high God is a term that is never used concerning the children of Israel. The children of Israel were more acquainted with the term Jehovah, or El Shaddai but "the most high God" you see, as I’ve stressed

in other lessons is the term of God that was not unique just to Israel, but to the whole of creation. He’s "the most high God" of everything. Jehovah is primarily the God concerning Israel. But this is the "most high God" and you’ll see this throughout Scripture. I’m going to make a couple of points before we leave and chase down this title. We have this first introduction to Melchizedek with Abraham here at about 2000 BC. I say about,because we don’t know within a hundred years or so. But here we’re introduced to this high priest of the most high God at about 2000 BC. Now we might as well follow the Scripture so that you’ll follow me there and then we’ll come back. Jump all the way up to Psalms 110, and I think it’s verse 4. There is no mention of him in between from Genesis to Psalms. And now the Psalmist writes: Psalms 110:4 "The LORD has sworn, and will not repent, Thou art a priest forever after the order of Melchizedek." Let me give you a thought provoking question. How many years have passed by since Abraham was introduced to the priest of the most high and until David puts it here in the Psalms? About a thousand! A thousand years have gone by from Melchizedek’s introduction to Abraham until David. Now then, how many years went by from David until Paul brings him up again in Hebrews? Another thousand. Thousand year intervals, that we are introduced to this high priest Melchizedek. Amazing isn’t it? Alright let’s come back to Genesis and let’s just pick this apart a little further. This Melchizedek, the priest of the "most high God," meets Abraham and he brought forth bread and wine. Now, number one, was it a practical gift? You don’t know what I’m driving at do you? How many people are in this particular little unit with Abraham at this time? How many soldiers did he take out of his hired help? Three hundred. So he’s had three hundred men who have just come back from battle and they’re famished and they’re thirsty and so in the physical realm, what does this Melchizedek provide? Food and water for Abraham’s troops! But then it goes so much further than that. Where does bread and wine become a high point in the life of the believer? Well at the Lord’s table. The Lord’s table and what did it speak of? His shed Blood and His broken body. And so, all these things have ramifications. Now, we don’t see anything concerning Melchizedek in the operation of God in Israel because Melchizedek is not in the line of Levi and the priests of Israel. He’s the priest of "the most high God." Who was not just the priest of Israel, he was the priest of all. And that’s what I want people to see. This Melchizedek was a high priest of "the most high God." Now we’ve done this before but let’s do it again. So turn with me now to Daniel because I want you to see that we have no references to Melchisedec’s priesthood throughout Israel’s history because Israel wasn’t connected per se with "the most high God." Don’t take me too literal on that. Of course, "the most high God" was the same God as Jehovah and El Shaddai and all that. But, in terms of language for our own understanding, we have these different names of God. The same God. They’re not different, they’re the same One, but in the role, in the operation, God has given us these different nomenclatures to show that He is dealing with the non-Jew as He is with the Nation of Israel. Alright here in Daniel chapter 4, start with verse 1. Daniel 4:1a "Nebuchadnezzar (Jew or Gentile? Gentile!) the king, unto all people, nations, and languages,…" Is that just Israel? Now I think most of you, especially if you’ve been watching the programs lately in the morning in the book of Acts, what do I stress? Is there any Gentile language in here? No, there isn’t any Gentile language in Acts chapters 2 ,3 or 4. It’s all Jewish. Now I can ask the same question in reverse. Are there any Jews in here? No. This is Gentile. And so he says: Daniel 4:1b-2 "…that dwell in all the earth; Peace be multiplied unto you. (He’s not talking directly to the Jew.

He’s talking to the nations. So Nebuchadnezzar says) 2. I thought it good to show the signs and wonders that the high God hath shown toward me." Who’s he talking about? "The most high God" of Whom, Melchizedek was the high priest. You can come on over in that same chapter to verse 17. Now this isn’t by accident. This is by design, the intricacy again of the Scriptures. That everything is so intricately put together. Daniel 4:17a "This matter is by the decree of the watchers, and the demand of the word by the holy ones; to the intent that the living may know that the most high ruleth in the kingdom of men, and giveth it to whomsoever he will,…" Drop down to verse 34: Daniel 4:34 "And at the end of the days, I, Nebuchadnezzar (the Gentile king) lifted up my eyes unto heaven, and my understanding returned unto me, and I blessed the most high, and I praised and honored him that liveth forever, whose dominion is an everlasting dominion, (He’s the most high God) and his kingdom is from generation to generation:" Alright I’ve got one more while we’re in Daniel chapter 5 - verse 18, because I want to drum into you that this is a term or a name of God as He is associated with the non-Jewish world. Now I probably should qualify that. The Jews are part of the whole big picture, but they are more concerned with Jehovah God and El Shaddai and some of these others, but "the most high" is always connected with the non-Jewish world. Daniel 5:18 "O thou king, the most high God gave Nebuchadnezzar thy father a kingdom, and majesty and glory, and honour:" You can go all the way through Scripture then, and whenever you have a reference to the "most high God," you’re dealing with the non-Jewish world. And that’s why Paul speaks of it now with regard to the Melchisedec priesthood back there in Hebrews that he was the priest of "the most high God." Alright let’s come back to Genesis, because when the Scripture repeats and repeats and repeats, it’s for a reason. It’s not here just to fill the page. Genesis 14:19a "And he blessed him, and he said, Blessed be Abram of the most high God,…" You want to remember, has the Nation of Israel appeared yet? No, Israel isn’t on the scene yet. God is just now beginning to deal with Abraham, and there’s no Law. There’s not even circumcision yet, and so the relationship between this man who is not yet part and parcel of the Nation of Israel is "the most high God." Genesis 14:19 "And he blessed him, and said, Blessed be Abram of the most high God, possessor of heaven and earth;" You have almost the same kind of language in Matthew concerning Christ, how that He too was Lord of all. Alright, verse 20: Genesis 14:20 "And blessed be the most high God, which hath delivered thine enemies into thy hand. And he gave him tithes of all." Then once more in verse 22. Genesis 14:22 "And Abram again said to the king of Sodom, I have lift up mine hand unto the LORD, the most high God, the possessor of heaven and earth," Okay, now I’ve already touched on the one in Psalms. A thousand years later, but nothing associated with it. It’s just that God designates the Messiah, the Son of God as the One Who will be Melchizedek the priest of "The most high God." Alright, in the moments we have left let’s flip back to Hebrews if you will. Chapter 7 verse 2. Hebrews 7:2a "To whom also Abraham gave a tenth part of all;" Which of course we know, and I’ve made reference to that in previous programs. That the giving of the ten-percent or the tithe, began with Abraham in Genesis. It funneled into the Law as part of the Levitical provision and then of course the Apostle Paul tells us that we are not under Law, we’re under Grace. Which takes away the responsibility of the ten-percent in our giving. Now Paul says, that we give as the Lord lays on our heart. Big difference. And there is no demand to give a flat ten-percent. But that’s beside the point on this program. We want to go on now - that He is the King of Righteousness, He’s Holy, He’s Omnipotent, but here’s the part I want to spend the next few moments on.

He is the "King of Salem,"which, like I said a few moments ago, are the last letters of Jerusalem, or the city of peace, which is to say the King of peace. Hebrews 7:2b "…first being by interpretation King of righteousness, and after that also King of Salem, which is, King of peace;" I want you to stop and think for a moment - in all the thousands of years that we know Jerusalem has been on the scene beginning with Abraham at 2000 BC, how many days of peace has Jerusalem enjoyed? Not one. It has been a city of turmoil from day one. And especially in the last 2000 years. Just stop and think of all the various empires that have overrun Jerusalem. It has been anything but the city of peace. Then especially when Israel came back into the land after World War II and fought their war of independence in 1948. Jerusalem was besieged again and she has been over and over up through the centuries with bloodshed and mayhem. It’s unbelievable that the city of peace has never enjoyed peace. Well, look at her tonight. Look at Jerusalem tonight. Is it a city of peace? Anything but. It’s in constant turmoil. Well, you have ask, "Why?" When God has designated it as the city of peace, why has it been a constant city of turmoil. Well again, what do we have to do? Patiently wait. God has promised that it’s going to be a city of peace. Do you believe it? Yes! I know one time on one of our tours, we had a rather orthodox Jewish guide and at breakfast one morning I asked him, "When will you settle all these Middle Eastern problems?" And I’ll never forget, with his chubby finger said, "When He comes." And he’s so right. There’ll be no peace in Jerusalem, I don’t care who tries to broker it. There will be no peace in the city of peace until Christ returns. And so a logical prayer for us is, "pray for the peace of Jerusalem."

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troughtonmedia · 2 years

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A liver of many lives

It all started in the year of our lord 1988 when I took another couple weeks to develop in the womb for early July. My father is god. He just retired a year ago and has become a professional fisherman in the meanwhile. My mom is great she is ditsy and hates doing dishes. Anyways back to the liver of many lives it all started in Discovery Bay, California. My mom's dad owned and operated a marina in Bethel Island. He is gone with the wind ever since he died in 2007 leaving a gap of missed learning for my brother and I.

My dad's dad played Football at Cal Berkeley in the late forties and Ill I knew of him was the unbelievable pain that man had. He picked up gardening and in return he found fruits and vegetables. My dad's mom was a nurse by trade so she was always able to take care of him. This is a liver of many lives!

I can remember as far back as Pre-School. Unbelievably enough, I would continue in school with many of these people. There were games, puzzles, movies, Nintendo, etcetera. We played every sport we possibly could from soccer, to basketball, to baseball, to football it was quite the day!

Kindergarten through High School went bye like a breeze. Our calendar is 365 days long and it celebrates Holidays like Christmas, and Easter, and Halloween, and Valentine's Day. The first one celebrates the birth of our savior Jesus Christ so help me god with this story he was crucified for our sins and reborn in Heaven. Mormons even go so far to say he ventured to America after his death in the Middle East.

Next up was College and let me tell you it was dope. I started in the dorms and worked my way into a Fraternity also while entering the Oregon Bass Team with a leadership position. I would compete in College Fishing all 4 years at the University of Oregon. We fished coastal lakes and reservoirs in the Willamette Valley. The Fraternity was cool I took on Risk Manager Freshman year, Galley Steward Sophomore year.

After graduating in 2010, I took on the RSR role at the Hershey Company and I have to admit it is still crazy writing about it now. It was in Las Vegas, Nevada. I would spend an extra 6 months there trying to sell cars at Desert Toyota until I picked up a couple friends and we got rear ended on the freeway that totaled the 2012 Scion tC I was driving! We spiraled down the freeway and I basically blacked out as the airbags launched into the vehicle! Wild huh? A liver of many lives

I would move back to Discovery Bay, a common theme here. In the middle of 2012 I got a job at Antioch Toyota because I had an idea about there catalog plus Jesus came to me in dream. I got fired for poor performance but met some cool sales people from Afghanistan, Iran, and Canada. Guys from all walks of life. Some had done mortgage sales, news casters, and many more. Real brief here, after I got fired I went to the same career fair I found out about the Hershey Company, and got a job with Sears. I worked at Sears to sell HVAC for a year.

Forgot to mention I drove to Nashville, Tennessee in 2013. Crossed into Nevada, Utah, Wyoming, Colorado, Kansas, Missouri, Illinois, Kentucky, and into Tennessee. I passed around flyers like a mad man for tce070 the ameba virus. Shapeless, formless, invisible, and everywhere! That's right ladies and gentlemen G O D.

In 2015, I could've just driven off a cliff as I disappeared into the Justice system for an alleged arson attack that became a battery and a bank heist! Jail was no good for me at all as the record will probably show. One time the jailer opened my cage and I ran down to the next level and called my Mom. Another time I tried to end it and wound up in the Hospital handcuffed to a bed. Then for 3 days I was put into a closet sized room with nothing on but a smock. It was extreme torture so when the psychologist I jumped out and knocked her to the ground. After that I was in solitary confinement for two months reading books like In the Heart of the Sea, The Right Stuff, and Huckleberry Finn. A liver of many lives the story continues as I was crammed into a van for a 3 hour drive to Atascadero State Hospital. It was an improvement from Jail and I could tell they wanted me to get better.

Four years of my life I can never get back nobody wants to be spending their mid to upper twenties delivering pizza for Domino's. I did it until I got robbed at gunpoint and just couldn't take it anymore. I spent 2020 like most of you with out any work on unemployment with extreme $600 bonuses! I traveled to Alaska to catch giant Halibut and I have also fished the San Francisco Bay which is completely different type of halibut. A liver of many lives!

For over a year now I've been working inside a dream at a marina that rents out electric boats to anyone for a really good deal. We even keep em out there trout, striper, and catfish! This is my current situation Friday through Monday working at Los Vaqueros Watershed in a park service type of job. They are supposedly going to close Los Vaqueros for a couple years in the future which I believe means employment will cease. As of right now, I have no plan for the near future. At the lake I am paid to pay attention.

A liver of many lives

The End

#blog #story #Carter Troughton

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