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triptuckers · 3 years

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New In Town (part six) - Kaz Brekker

Request: nope Pairing: Kaz Brekker x reader Summary: after your meeting late at night with Kaz, you expect not much to change. he shows you just how wrong you are Warnings: language Word count: 2.8K A/N: oh I loved writing this sm I hope you guys like it!! :) PREVIOUS PART | NEXT PART TAG LIST (all grishaverse fics): @ayushmitadutta @mrs-brekker15@dancingwith-sunflowers @thegirlwiththeimpala @parker-natasha @story-scribbler@romanoffstarkovs @daliareads@meiitanoia @itsnotquimey @sanktaesperanza@whymyparentscheckmyphone @aleksanderwh0r3 @ilovemarvelanne1 @marlenaisnthappy @brekker-zenik @just-deka @graceknxwlson @the-very-tired-mess TAG LIST (Kaz Brekker): @mufnasa @janesofia7 @stairscortana @parker-natasha@illicitghosts @brick-by-brick553 TAG LIST (New In Town series): @calums-betch add yourself to my tag lists here

You're sneaking through a museum. It's dark, and there are no lights in the halls. Luckily, the carpet on the ground is rather thick, and it helps with muffling the sound of your footsteps.

A couple of days ago, you overheard Kaz telling the crows a valuable DeKappel painting would be moved from Os Kervo to Ketterdam. Which is why you're in the museum.

You'd listened to his description of the painting. Because it's dark, you can't move fast. You have to stop in front of each painting to step closer, squint your eyes, and determine wether or not it's the painting you're looking for.

Of course, you'd wondered wether there is a DeKappel here at all. Kaz had said he'd take precautions against you. But you didn't know if he figured out yet how you got your information. Besides, the painting would be worth a good amount of kruge, and you couldn't resist.

As you're sneaking through the museum, a tiny voice in the back of your head makes you question this job again.

Kaz hadn't told the others how big the painting is.

If you were to walk down the streets with some enormous painting right after someone snuck into the museum, you wouldn't even have to try to lie. They'd know it was you.

But maybe the painting wouldn't be that big, and you could easily take it with you back to your apartment. Either way, you had to find the painting before the crows did.

You've never been in the museum before. When you set foot in the dark museum, you immediately thought you'd underestimated it. The building was far larger than you'd thought.

The hallways seem to go on forever, twisting and turning and with big rooms with art at the ends of them. You're running out of time, as the crows would arrive soon.

Just as you're muttering to yourself about bringing a map the next time, you walk into a room and see there's only a single painting on the wall.

As you walk closer, you recognise it from Kaz' description. You read the card on the wall next to it, and it's indeed the DeKappel you are looking for.

But when you step back to look at it again, you realise it was all a waste of time. The painting is way too big for you to take off the wall and carry home by yourself.

Looks like this time, Kaz could do his own job.

When you're about to turn around and walk away, you hear a sound in the distance, coming from the hallway that leads to the room you're in.

Someone walks into the room and the two of you simultaneously pull out a gun and point it at each other. It's too dark to see who they are, all you can tell is that they're tall, and pointing a gun at you. Then they speak up.

'Afraid that's our prize, love.'

You can see the way his gun slightly lowers in surprise when you start to chuckle softly.

'Don't worry, Jesper, you can have it.' you say.

Jesper slowly lowers his gun even more. 'Y/N?' he says and you can hear the confusion in his voice.

'Little different from working at a cafe, hm?' you say as you start to walk toward him.

When you get closer, you can see his face. He's looking down at you and frowning, as if he still doesn't understand what you're doing there.

'What are you doing here?' asks Jesper.

'She's stealing a DeKappel.' says Kaz, who walks up to the two of you, followed by Inej and Wylan.

You see how Jesper's eyes widen. 'You were going to steal something?' he says.

'Sorry I don't fit the imagine you have of me in your mind.' you say.

You look at Kaz. 'Is this one of your precautions?' you say.

'No.' he says. 'I didn't know it was going to be this big. Luckily, and unlike you, I have a crew.'

'Well, good luck and until next time.' you say, walking past him, but he stops you by putting his cane on the ground in front of your feet, forcing you to stop walking. Instead of looking at you, however, Kaz turns to the other crows.

'Get the painting off that wall and be careful not to damage it.' he says. 'Nina and Matthias will signal to us if there are guards nearby.'

Inej, Wylan and Jesper look at Kaz and you, clearly having no clue why or how you know each other. Apparently, you weren't the only one Kaz was a mystery to.

When the three of them walk over to the painting, Kaz turns to you again.

'I have a proposition for you.' he says.

You raise your eyebrows. 'If it involves the money that DeKappel is worth, I'm listening.' you say.

'A job.' says Kaz. 'You're good, you have valuable skills. Become a member of the Dregs, and then one of the crows.'

You laugh softly and shake your head. 'I work alone.' you say. 'And besides, I'm having way too much fun with this game we're playing.'

Before Kaz can say anything else, you wink at him and disappear into the shadows of the dark hallway.

You don't spot Nina or Matthias as you make your way out of the museum. As you start to walk toward your apartment, you can't help but to notice you don't feel bad about not getting the painting.

Maybe you didn't get the painting, you did get a job offer from Kaz. Which shows he thinks you are fit to be amongst his crew. Though you wonder what it would be like to actually work for him, you're glad you didn't accept his offer.

You'd told him the truth; you liked this game between the two of you too much to just give it up like that. And besides, there would be many more jobs to come which you could sabotage. The game isn't over yet.

That night when you lay in bed, you keep thinking about the other crows. How Jesper, Inej and Wylan had looked at you and Kaz with confused looks on their faces. You wonder if they know more about Kaz than you do. He seemed like a mysterious and private person to you.

Your last thought before you fall asleep is that you couldn't wait to see the confused looks on their faces when you stole their target, again.

Whatever Kaz had tried to do to stop you, either it didn't work, or he didn't try hard enough.

When you get to your usual spot on the Slat's roof the next day, there's no indication whatsoever that someone has been there, or knows you're there.

You lay back on the roof to look at the clouds, waiting for someone to start talking in Kaz' rooms. Even if no one is going to say anything, you like resting on the roof. It's like your own personal spot. With a view of a big part of the city, and you can listen to the conversations in the street below. Or if someone in the Slat has their windows open, you could listen to whatever they were saying.

You think back to Kaz' offer. You'd spend many days listening to their conversations and meetings, but also their laughter, their jokes, their small talk.

Even after living in Ketterdam for a while now, you have yet to make good friends. Jesper is the one you used to talk to the most, but you wonder if it'll change now that he knows you're the one who has been stealing from them.

The crows weren't really your friends, quite the opposite. But you did genuinely enjoy talking to Jesper. And whatever game you've got going on with Kaz.

You wonder if you'd still see them if somehow this thing between you and Kaz suddenly stopped.

You're so caught up in your thinking, you don't realise someone is talking in the room beneath you. Quickly but carefully, you move closer to the open window to listen.

'Did you know Y/N was the one stealing from us?' says Jesper.

'Yes.' says Kaz.

'How did you find out?' says Jesper.

'I figured it out a couple of days ago.' says Kaz.

Perhaps he hadn't figured out how you got your information. Otherwise he wouldn't be talking about you, if he knew you were listening to them.

'How do you know her? Y/N?' says Inej.

'She was a bartender at a pub Kaz and I went to a while ago. We were talking about a job, and then someone went ahead and snatched that necklace away from us. I thought it was a coincidence at first.' explains Jesper.

'Only it wasn't, and she stole more.' says Inej. 'So, she knows about our jobs, and Kaz' plans, and we don't know how she keeps on outsmarting us?'

'Something like that.' says Kaz.

'So all we have to do is figure out how she gets that information, and we can outsmart her?' says Inej.

'If you know how she gets such information, please, enlighten me because I have no clue.' says Kaz in a sarcastic voice.

They're all silent for a while. You think they might have moved to a different room, but then you hear Wylan's voice.

'Someone keeps outsmarting you and you don't know how she does it?' he says. 'But no one outsmarts you.'

'Apparently, at least one person does.' says Kaz.

You smile at his words. You can't help but to feel proud. Apparently it was hard to outsmart Kaz, and you'd done it more than once.

'But enough about Y/N, we've got work to do. We're going back to the museum tomorrow.' says Kaz.

'Why?' says Jesper. 'We just got back, and I'll bet they have more security now after we got that DeKappel.'

'Because I saw something that caught my eye and it's worth a lot of money. So we're going back to get it.' says Kaz.

'Did you not hear me when I said there'd be more security?' says Jesper.

'I did. Which is why we're going to go during the day. Wylan will make sure there's a distraction. In the chaos, Jesper, Inej and Nina will get the target. A set of hand written letters of one of the first Queens of Ravka. Worth a lot of money to the right people. Matthias and I will handle the guards if there are any.' says Kaz.

'How big of a distraction?' says Wylan.

'Big enough.' says Kaz. 'We'll go in around 11 in the morning, when it's busy so there's enough people and we can lose the guards in the crowd.'

Satisfied with the new information, you lay back down on the roof and close your eyes, enjoying the feeling of the sun on your face. You listen as they all shuffle around the room and hear the door close.

You feel your eyelids starting to feel heavier, and push yourself up into a sitting position. The last thing you needed was to fall asleep on a roof.

You slowly move to the open window, listening if anyone is still there. When you don't hear anything, you start to climb your way back down.

After checking to see if any of the crows are near, you begin walking back to your apartment. Even though they all knew you are the one to steal from them, you doubted they'd do anything to you if they saw you in the streets. But still you preferred not to run into any of them.

You spend the rest of the day walking around the city, not doing much. You'd gotten your information, so there wasn't much left for you to do except waiting.

You walk around the canals, looking out over the city. Over time, you'd learned all of the streets, small alleys, shops, cafes and pubs. You loved Ketterdam, and its people. Even though your jobs were different from the ones you did back in Ravka, you prefer Ketterdam.

No one looks twice at you, everyone just minds their own business. And people know there are gangs, so they don't question someone hiding weapons in their clothes or having bruised knuckles. You could really do anything you wanted without someone giving you funny looks.

Back in your apartment that night, you pause in the doorway. Even though the sun had been out all day, it's cold. Most of your neighbours had gone to bed already, so there was no one for you to greet as you'd walked the stairs.

Ignoring the wave of loneliness that washed over you, you shrug off your coat and take off your boots. You put your weapons away and make yourself a last cup of tea before getting ready for bed.

You'd have to wake up early tomorrow, given that you intended to arrive at the museum earlier than the crows. It would be an easy job. A bunch of letters were far more easier to smuggle out of the museum than a large painting. You didn't have anything to worry about.

The next day, it's cold outside but you can tell by the sky it's going to be another sunny day. After a quick breakfast, you get dressed, hide your weapons beneath your clothing, and lock the door of your apartment behind you.

As you're walking to the museum, you don't bother to look for the crows. They wouldn't arrive til 11. You pay for an entry ticket and enter the museum.

You still remember the hallways from the last time you were there. You walk around and see the room where the DeKappel had been is sealed off.

Resisting the urge to linger, you keep on walking, looking for the letters Kaz had talked about. Slowly, the museum starts to get more crowded. It would indeed be easy to lose someone in the crowd.

You follow a large group of tourists and finally see the letters. After waiting for the tourists to leave, you step closer to the letters. They don't seem very valuable to you. They're just letters. The handwriting is so elaborate you're having a hard time reading it.

You take out your watch and see it's barely 10. You'd walk around the museum, get back here in time, wait for Wylan's distraction and snatch the letters away from their showcase.

But before you can walk off again, you hear a voice besides you.

'Impressive, right?'

You whirl around to see Kaz standing next to you.

'What are you doing here?' you hiss, frantically looking around to see if you can spot any other crows.

'Visiting a museum.' says Kaz in a very casual voice. 'What else would I be doing here?'

'Cut the crap, Brekker, we both know why you're here.' you say.

Instead of answering you, Kaz merely looks at you and almost smirks. He takes out a watch of his own, and then you hear an explosion big enough to make the walls of the room shake. Wylan's distraction.

Before you can move to grab a hold of the letters, Kaz has given you a sharp poke with his cane, making your left arm go numb. You offendedly open your mouth and watch as he quickly smashes the glass and takes the letters.

'Two can play a game.' he says as he takes off, disappearing in the panicking crowd.

It's like those words bring you back to reality. You force your legs to move as you run after him, ignoring the fact you can barely use your left arm.

People are pushing you and running in all directions as you're desperately trying not to lose Kaz. You see the back of his head in the crowd and only seconds later he's gone.

As you're making your way through the crowd, you bump into a tall figure.

Jesper is grinning down at you. 'Now Kaz is the one to finally outsmart you.' he says. 'See you around, Y/N!'

And he's gone just as fast as he appeared.

'Fuck.' you mutter as you push through the crowd toward the exit. You had to find them before they could take off.

Outside, the sun is shining and people are running from the museum in every direction. You squint your eyes due to the bright sunlight and try to spot the crows.

But as the last people leave the museum, you have to admit they got away.

This time, Kaz Brekker was the one to outsmart you.

A/N: If you want to request something, make sure to read my house rules Here’s the list of characters I write for. Everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist. Please don’t repost my work, as I spend much time and effort on it!! Thank you for reading! Much love, Marit

#asjdflksjdflksj I loved writing this woah #new in town #kaz brekker #shadow and bone #grishaverse #Kaz Brekker x reader #kaz brekker fanfic #kaz brekker fic #Kaz Brekker fics #Kaz Brekker fanfics #Kaz Brekker fanfiction #shadow and bone fics #shadow and bone fic #shadow and bone fanfics #shadow and bone fanfic #shadow and bone fanfiction

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thedelusionreaderbitch · 3 years

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So I just wanted to do a thing about the upcoming posts:

Fairytale Chapter 3 - Kanej

Captains? Part 3/? - Ig

Just part 3, go read the rest

We were born sick - Zn

Request: Can you do the enemies to lovers trope with Zoya Nazyalensky? (also fem reader pls)

(based on this request but then I made a headcanon out of it instead!!! So this is kinda from this request but something totally different from my headcanon!)

Diagnosed Part 2 - The Crows

Request: Can you do a platonic crows x reader where the reader has an old friend group that she left behind when she moved to the barrel. One day her old friends show up at the slat and she starts spending time with them, which make the crows jealous. (sorry if I have poor writing skills)

The ultimate lover's quarrel - Mh

Request: Can I please request an oneshot for Matthias Helvar x female reader where they get married to eachother, please? thank you so much!!

Bonding - Ls

Request: Hi! Could you do a liam stewart (the darkest minds) x fem reader imagine? Maybe something where the reader and liam knew each other before the whole sikness thing started (sorry i cant quite remember what its called lol) and she can control electricity and is helping the league and one day she helps around 4 kids break out of a camp but they are being followed so she drives to the nearest building which is an abandoned supermarket or something like that and there she and the 4 kids find liam, charles, zu and ruby who have also been hiding there. So they just start binding again but one day one of the 4 kids, a boy comes over and assaults the reader or something and liam gets super overprotective and stuff? Im very sorry if its too detailed... i kinda trailed off lol. have a wonderful day!

You come out to them as genderfluid and bisexual - The Crows as parents

Request: Heyy If you're still taking requests, can I request a one shot or headcanons (either fine your choice :)) for the Crows as parents? Maybe the kid comes out as genderfluid and bisexual? And how the react and maybe the kid is genuinely scared of coming out to them and maybe like they reassure them

We're everything On Our Own - Kb

Request: Hey I really love your writing! I was wondering if you could write a Kaz Brekker x reader and the reader is ace and the come out to him, cuz they know that he feels that he can’t give them the love and affection (in a sexual way) that he thinks he hey want/need and they tell him that they don’t mind him not being able to give them *sexual* because well they’re ace and that’s not something they want/need anyways so it works out fine? If not that’s totally fine. I hope you have a nice day :)

Chinok - Gs

Request: Hey, hope you are doing well during those tiring times! Do you think you could maybe write something for a male (thank you so much for this btw) squaller who is similar to Zoya (rather cold, badass) but madly in love with Genya? And he turns into a shy idiot when has to actually talk to her? Idk if this is fine with the canon pairing so feel free to ignore this!

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sillylittlestoryblog · 3 years

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Jesper Fahey Imagine

Jesper x female Reader

This is my first imagine ever. So pls don’t be to harsh😅

Also i m not a native English speaker so if I made horrible mistakes pls tell me nicely🙂

+ I m new to the grishaverse so there is a lot I just made up... again If I made horrible mistakes.. enlighten me 🥰

I wanna post this with he/him and they/them pronouns too. Just so nobody feels left out ✨

The winter air was terrible cold against y/n`s ears. Instinctively, she buried her face further into her scarf. She hated this time of year, especially in ketterdam. Because of the docks and the sea, it was even colder here than in her former home. She came to Ketterdam years ago, but she still didn’t seem to have gotten used to the city. The city with its dark alleys and dangerous corners. She had been told to get a decent job. Never be Outside in the dark. And above all she should Stay Out of the criminal gangs and their streetfights. And yet here she was, running again in the direction of the Crow Club to meet dirtyhands in person.

After the heavy oak door closed behind her, she took a deep breath. The warm air felt wonderful on her skin. There wasn't too much going on in the club tonight. Which pleased her very much.

" well who do we have here? I was afraid that you wouldn't come because of the snowstorm out there. ”Jesper's voice sounded happily through the room. In his hand he was holding a drink that he halfway spilled on his way to her.

Y / N didn't want to admit it, but she was happy to see him. Most of all, she was pleased that he was already a Bit drunk, so she hoped he wouldn't notice how she blushed while he hugged her.

Together they went to a table in a quieter corner of the crow club. Kaz Brekker sat there with his crowcane in his hand and sighed as Y/N and Jesper approached. Shortly afterwards she noticed Inej emerging from the shadows. She quietly sat down next to Kaz, keeping a safe distance as always. Y / N wasn't sure if she was doing it to give Kaz more space or to better protect herself. Y/N sat down next to Nina who was sitting on the other side of the table and apparently had a lot of fun giving a already drunken Mattias more and more alcohol.

Jesper sat down next to Y/N with a loud noise and started talking about his win today. He had lost a lot of money in a few card games and then won the Same Money back again after a round of chess. Inej had to explain the rules to him beforehand and was shocked that he really didn't understand how the game worked. His only luck was that his opponent understood it even less and so he had defeated him after a few rounds despite his moderate knowledge of chess.

Y/N was happy to have this group. For her, it almost felt like she had a found family, a home. The others also appreciated her very much. Nina was glad that there was another Grisha in the group. She loved challenging Y/N to play pranks on the other crow members. Even if the others wouldn't admit it, everyone loved the jokes they made up. Only Kaz usually looked offended when the two kept his people from their serious work.

She had also built up a good relationship with Inej in the two years that she had been part of the crows. Both were rather calm and liked to spend time alone. But they loved to talk about novels and books together. Inej and her had already broken into the library of Ketterdam several times at night to be able to read there in peace. Y / N fondly remembers those evenings. Especially Brekker's red-hot face when he found out what they had done. He was incredibly angry and didn't even let them be on the next mission. Meanwhile, Jesper just stood there, amused. Although he was disappointed in both of them too. But more because they didn't ask him to come along. Inej had smirked at the time and said that he was probably jealous. And to this day Y/N kept thinking about it. She could hardly imagine that he wanted to tag along because of the books.

"Hey are you even listening to me"

Jesper moved his hand up and down in front of her face.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

Y / N knew this wasn't the first time he'd caught her thinking about him. She reached for the glass that Nina had put in front of her nose a few minutes ago. Hopefully that would take his mind off the nervous expression on her face.

"I thought it would be incredible if I would open a bakery with the money. You know the Money i won earlier"

Y/N looked deeper into her glass. In fact, she hadn't noticed what he'd told her. "Hmm interesting. I uh... would not have thought you were the bakery type. "

"Why not?" Jesper started to grin in amusement. Now he was glad that she was just so embarrassed and looking down. She was indeed looking really cute, while trying to come up with a logical answer that hopefully wouldn't hurt his feelings.

“Well you've shot at least 5 people in the last two days. And uh ... "

Jesper had to laugh out loud. "Hey hey little one, I was just kidding. I was Joking... Something like that happens when you don't listen. ”There was a big grin on his face. It felt like it went from one ear to the other. His dark eyes began to glow. Y/N didn't even notice how long the two had been staring at each other. Jesper looked away with a jerk and began to stammer something to himself, “I actually wanted to ask you something. Are we both going to break into that one library tomorrow night? I heard about this one book. And well we could steal it together. "

Y/N just had to grin. Maybe Inej was right after all and Jesper wanted to spend time with her.

"Sure, why not ... but you know that this is illegal?"

"It's only illegal if we get caught"

The next evening they both met below the roofs of Ketterdam's university district. Jesper's hair was disheveled, probably because he had slept until a few minutes ago. The night before had stolen both of their strength. None of them could really remember much. Once again, Nina had endured the most alcohol, but probably only because she was the one who made the others drink. Inej had gone to bed relatively early and in the early morning twilight still heard the singing voices of Matthias and Jesper. Y / N could roughly remember participating in a drinking game. And somehow she thought she had seen a smiling Kaz, but that would be too improbable.

It wasn't quite as cold as the night before, but because of the tiredness Y / N was all the more cold that day. Jesper didn't seem to have any other way. He had wrapped himself deep in his coat and was wearing a much too long scarf around his neck that he had stepped on twice while running. It was unusual for the shooter to be so calm. Most of the time he would talk out loud about his achievements in playing cards or he would consider a daring mission to get rich. He was very talkative, only today he was speechless.

Getting to the library was very easy there was a secured part in the south wing. Valuable writings from Kerch were stored there. But the two were only looking for a novel that would be insignificant for most People. It didn't take long for the two of them to get into the building over the roof of an adjoining building and through its courtyard.

Y / N knew her way around the library halls; after all, she had often come and gone there at night. Jesper ran right behind her, afraid of losing her between the tall bookshelves. It didn't take long for Jesper to find the right book. It was about tales and horror stories that used to be told to children in front of the campfire. Jesper had overheard Inej talking about this book. She had shared how she loved these stories as a child. That seemed like the right book for the right reason

y / n to dare a night break-in. He had longed to spend time alone with her for a long time. He admired her for her courage and caring. Jesper had been alone for a long time. Far from everything that felt like family. But the Crows gave him a home. Kaz was the protector of the crows and Jesper was happy to have someone like him, but somehow the warmth in the crow club was missing. But the warmth was suddenly there when the young grisha girl ran into his arms two years ago. She has been on his mind ever since. How many times had he caught himself paying special attention to her on missions. Or the many times she was turned on by drunkards and he would have loved to draw his revolver. Even now he could only think of her smile.

She had spread her coat on the floor and was tapping the spot next to her. Jesper sat down next to her, grinning, and began to read.

The warm sun shone on Y / N's face. What a nice way to be awakened. Most of the time she woke up by hearing gunshots in the street or the loud talk of seafarers stumbling towards the port. It smelled of old books, dust and leather. Only now did she realize that she was not in her bed. She opened her eyes carefully, hoping not to wake up in a prison or a cargo ship. But her surroundings were not unknown to her, only she had never seen them in this light. Next to her lay Jesper who had embraced her with both arms. She had never seen him so calm before. His chest moved slowly up and down as he breathed. How beautiful he looked.

"You should hire someone to make a portrait of me, believe me that will last longer."

Jesper's eyes were still closed. Y / N's face turned red again. She had to stop looking at him like that.

"Good morning, how did you sleep between so much Important literature?" She tried to distract from the subject.

Jesper opened his eyes and looked at her. Only now did she realize how close they were. He still had his arms around her. Jesper also noticed now what kind of situation they were in. He opened his mouth to answer when Y / N suddenly perceived voices from outside. She put her finger to his lips and turned her head towards the window. There were three library guards in the courtyard. They had just noticed the open window through which Jesper and Y/N had entered the building the night before.

Without thinking further, both started running. If they hurried they could still get outside via the west entrance before the university square is full of students.

Luckily for them it was easy to run through the great hall into the foyer, Jesper tried hard not to pull out his revolver to get them out of the situation, but Y/n insisted that they could flee without getting noticed. But it was too late, the guards had already spotted them. Jesper took Y/N by the hand and the two ran laughing like two school girls through the corridors until they could escape over the balcony of the west wing.

They laughed and hugged. "Oh Jesper that was close"

"Yes, If i had not been there, you would have never made it out of there"

"If you hadn't been there I would have never fallen asleep in there"

"That's right, but then I would never have been able to do this either."

He leaned over to her and looked at her with an asking expression. For a moment he was afraid of having lost his self-confidence. He wondered if he had misinterpreted anything. All the times she looked at him with a blushing face and glowing eyes. Maybe he was just wrong ...

But He couldn't think clearly anymore because he had already been interrupted by Y / N's lips. At that moment they both forgot everything around them. The dirty city, the cold winter air and the screams of the guards who were still looking for them.

Fuck, I think that's how it feels at home.

Thx for reading this😅 if you liked it pls write a comment. Just so i know if i should continue writing or not✨ if somebody has a request for an imagine just comment it or text me in my direct messages 🥰💗

Mai 🦋

#jesper fahey x reader #jesper fahey #shadow and bone #shadow and bone imagine #inejgayfa #kaz brekker #netflix #booklr #imagine #six of crows #free rein

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klbwriting · 3 years

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Walls - Chapter 4

Fandom: Six of Crows

Pairing: Kaz/female!Reader

Summary: Kaz finds out about something Rollins is planning and tries to stop it

Taglist: @itsemy01 @sagewrites111 @aysegust @moondustmarauder @marinettepotterandplagg @bi-disaster101 @thedelusionreaderbitch @maybe-potato @malfoy-wife15 @fornarniaandforthefandom @rika90 @spawn0fsatan @aelnpruz @carlalyz @a-disappointing-teen-author

Being 12 in the Dregs was the perfect time to learn. Kaz was young enough that Per Haskell and the older members thought he was still green, too young to really know how to listen and learn, so they let him sit in on meetings, let him carry messages around town, and let him organize and clean offices alone. He used all of this time to absorb all the information he could about everyone. Who was paying who and how much, who wasn’t sleeping with their wife that night, or who had just bought a boy from a slaver, everything he could learn to use at a later time. So when Haskell sent him to the Emerald Palace was a note for Pekka Rollins Kaz took it gladly, desperately wanting to learn some secrets. However, when he read the message, his heart jumped to his throat.

I’ll have some Dregs waiting for Mellar and that girl by the Crow Club after 10 bells, they’ll rough her up good, give her a lesson for you. Make sure Mellar knows and stays by the backdoor so she can’t get into the club. You owe me. – Haskell

He knew that the ‘her’ being referred to had to be Y/N. She was the only person that Mellar was in charge of overseeing. He wasn’t sure what lesson Rollins wanted to teach her this time or why but he knew he had to stop it. He delivered the message as promised but instead of returning to the Slat he looked around, figuring the way that Mellar would probably take her to get to the club. He waited on a street that wasn’t normally crowded, bordering the back of some taverns and the canal. He stood, biding his time, his knife already in his hand.

It was dark and the street in front of the Emerald Palace was filling up just as Mellar walked out, Y/N following behind him. He glanced around, not a care in the world, he was Pekka Rollins’s enforcer, no one would touch him. Y/N was the daughter of the most powerful slum lord in the Barrel, she was safe outside of her home. At least, that’s what Mellar thought as he started down the side street near the canal, wanting to get this business over and done with. Y/N had been lippy with him all day and he couldn’t wait to see her get what was coming to her, harden her up some. He past in front of Kaz without noticing. Y/N stopped. She would find Kaz no matter where he was, she looked at him and he sent her a smirk before he jumped out of the shadows and onto Mellar’s back. He put his arm around to the man’s front and started stabbing, not caring where he hit or if he got cut in the process. Mellar let out a cry and fell to the ground, struggling to get away.

“They heard him…one of the barkers is coming, give me the knife,” she said, snatching it away from him. Kaz looked at her as she started stabbing herself. “Hide!” Kaz dove into an alcove between the taverns, holding his breath as a barker ran past him and to Y/N.

“Just wait until your father…” he started. She growled and held up the knife.

“What in the hell are you doing stupid girl?” came Rollins’s voice. Kaz could see him walking up to her. He looked between Mellar’s dead body and her, shaking his head. “Well, guess there’s a little bit of fight in you isn’t there?” He reached out, grabbing her by the hair to drag her back to his club, but she slashed the knife out, cutting his arm pretty bad. He growled and she instantly cowered back, knife falling to the cobbles. He had her hair still, so he bent down and picked up the knife. Kaz almost revealed himself then, wanting to save her, but he knew he couldn’t. They were outnumbered by 3 fully grown men, the odds were against them and he wasn’t foolish enough to try to play hero.

“Maybe you should get a taste of what Mellar felt,” Rollins said, stabbing the knife into her shoulder, pushing it in up to the hilt before pulling it out again. Y/N was panicking, her breath coming in short pants. “Here, a night in the canal should do you good.” He pushed her back and Kaz watched with horror as she fell back into the water, starting to sink. Rollins told the others to clean up Mellar’s mess before heading back. While they were distracted Kaz slid out and dove into the water. It took him a few seconds to find her floating just under the surface. He didn’t want to do this, it was too much like Jordie, but he couldn’t let her die in there. With all the will he could muster he slid one arm under her arms and swam towards the nearest set of stairs. He pulled her up, taking his shirt off and tearing off his sleeve. He wrapped it around her wound, tying it as tight as he could hoping that would be enough until he could get her somewhere a little safer.

Once the barkers had finished with Mellar’s body Kaz picked Y/N up, trying to be gentle while also ignoring the bile in his throat. He swallowed down the sick and climbed the stairs, keeping to alleys and side streets that were less crowded until he found the old burned out pleasure house near the Slat. There was a door that only swung open enough for a child or maybe small adult could fit through. Kaz set Y/N’s unconscious body against the wall and slid inside before pulling her in after him. He carried her to an old bed on the wall and laid her down. She was still breathing so he left to find something to use as a better bandage. He found an old cotton dress, something worn by one of the girls probably, and tore off a piece. He set about dressing her wound properly and once that was done and he knew he wouldn’t need to touch her again he vomited in a corner, his body shaking as he came to terms with what had happened. He had been able to keep the images and feelings at bay while he helped her, his need to save her had overridden his sickness. That was something to keep in mind for later, this could be overcome, but only when a stronger feeling came around.

“Kaz?” he heard her whisper. He moved over to the bed and sat down on it. She was awake, face still lacking color due to blood loss.

“You’re alive, we’re in that Dove’s Nest pleasure house that burnt down,” he said. She nodded slowly, eyes starting to focus.

“He stabbed me, threw me in the canal,” she said.

“And yet somehow you don’t have gangrene,” Kaz said, trying to take her mind off of the betrayal she had suffered. She laughed a little, but he knew his ploy hadn’t worked. Her life was a betrayal, from her father’s abuse, to those around her laughing at his actions, to the saints and gods that did nothing to save her. Kaz was the only person who hadn’t betrayed her, and he knew it was only a matter of time before he did. He would have to if he wanted to destroy Rollins’s life, he just hoped she would understand. “Where is your mother? Why isn’t she helping you?”

“My mother died having me,” she said. “I think that’s when my father decided I was a demon incarnate, come to bring him shame and suffering.” She tried to move her arm but just whimpered. Kaz tried to help her sit up but she waved him away. “Don’t force yourself, I don’t want to make you feel more uncomfortable than you already do.” Was he that transparent to her?

“Is that why he does this to you?” he asked, motioning to her shoulder. She nodded.

“He thinks it will harden me, make me more like him if I suffer enough I will want to make others suffer. It just does the opposite, I never want anyone to feel like I do ever again,” she said. So noble, Kaz wished he could be more like that sometimes. Imagine being able to take all the bad around you and try to make it good. She was trying to rise out of the swamp she was born while Kaz was nesting deep in it, building a nice summer home for him to spend his days.

“Get some rest,” he said softly, wanting this conversation to be over. This was too draining for him. She didn’t fight him, just laid her head down and closed her eyes. He could hear her breathing even out so he snuck out, finding food and water for when she woke up. He set himself up next to the bed and leaned his head back on the drooping mattress, watching her sleep. His eyes closed and he dreamed about killing Mellar again, only this time he finished the job, and in the dream she kissed him and he didn’t feel sick, he felt like flying.

In the morning she woke up after him, seeing just a note left nearby telling her to eat and drink and then get home. She smiled softly and ate the crackers he had left. She looked around the room and smiled a little. This could be a nice place to stay. As she walked back to the Emerald Palace she started planning how she could make that old brothel a little home for her. However, that dream ended the moment Rollins told her to come to his office.

“Its time you start taking responsibility around here, I’ve coddled you too long,” he said. “Seeing that killer instinct last night made me realize, you’re almost grown now, time for you to be a lieutenant in my gang, time for your first real job.”

“And what job is that?” she asked. He smiled.

“You are going to rob the Black Tips safe house past West Stave, take your new guard with you, gather some lions and get it done by tomorrow night,” Rollins said, motioning for a young man a of couple years older than her to follow. She glanced at him and he smiled at her, it was kind and she almost fell for it. Her father knew she was starting to get feelings for someone, she was at that age that things like that happened, so he was pushing someone from his crew for her to fall for. And since Kaz was unreachable, someone she couldn’t ever actually be with, maybe she would let it happen. She would keep Kaz in her heart, locked away in that place only soulmates get to stay. Maybe someday she could take him out and let those feelings really grow, but not now, not until the Dime Lions were dead and Kaz was sitting on their ashes.

#six of crows #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #kaz x reader #kazbrekker #kaz #walls series

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southslates · 3 years

Text

leave our lovers / ao3 / 2209 words / one-shot / post-canon / kanej / rated T / tw major character death & suicide attempt

He had been waiting at the docks.

He always was. The routine was that she’d pull up and he’d wait on the docks and then she would try to sneak up on him, but he’d see her and pull away. And then they’d hold hands, or hug, or kiss on the cheek. Depending on the year.

It’d been six years. Kaz thought he might be able to manage the lips today. He’d practiced, thought through the moment, the motions. He would do it—he would kiss the love of his life as she returned today, and he’d feel peace. Her last letter had come a week ago and she’d told him that she wasn’t sure how many journeys she had left at sea. She’d done her work cleaning the oceans out of slavers and set up a network of ships that were doing the job as well. Perhaps just another year or two, she’d written, and then I will spend my time with my family and in Kerch, of course.

It had been an opening. That was what Inej had written; what she had meant was commitment. She had told him I am going to stay with you and not leave you. She had told him I am never yours but I will keep coming back. She had listed out plans about what she would do with the children she collected on her travels, the schools and orphanages she wanted to run under the Dregs’ protections. She’d not even questioned his support.

Kaz and Inej were partners, after all. Sometimes he felt as though he’d left the beating part of his cold heart out on the ocean with her. When she came back he felt as though he was reunited with his soul.

He wanted to kiss her. He wanted to see the fluttering of red in her cheeks, he wanted to hear that magical laugh as she pulled back from him; she’d ask really Kaz, you’re doing this here, or perhaps, I love you.

He’d never said the words but he wanted to. He wasn’t a seventeen-year-old kid anymore—he wanted a future. He was pulling the Dregs into a legitimate business, he was ruling the Slat and half the Financial District. He was in good books with the Fjerdan and Ravkan governments. This country was his. He wanted to be hers.

Her ship rounded the horizon and his breath caught.

It was minutes later that Kaz realized something was wrong. There was a somber look about the crew on deck. Inej normally wasn’t on top, but quite a few of her hands were, and none were. He ran scenarios through his mind and tried to wonder what could have occurred—perhaps the ship was slightly wrecked? The Wraith looked fine to him, but he was no sailor. He hated the sea.

The boat docked. He held his cane carefully out and turned a cold-eye to Specht. “What’s occurred?”

“Sir . . .” Specht choked. He looked right into Kaz’s eyes—nobody ever did that. “Sir . . .”

Something terrible, dark, indescribable—something like Jordie—fell into the pits of Kaz’s stomach. “Specht?” he croaked in his rasp.

Inej had usually attempted to sneak up on him by this time. He could see her. Ever since that first night at the Menagerie he’d always been able to feel her, thrumming around him, comforting. He couldn’t feel her.

“I’m sorry, Sir,” Specht choked. “I’m so, so sorry.”

On the ship’s deck, two of the burly hands pulled a body—clothed in cotton, wrapped in sheets—out from below deck.

Kaz could make out a braid.

Kaz turned and walked away.

When was the last time Kaz Brekker had cried?

Perhaps about Jordie, all those years ago. All those fucking years ago. And now the Reaper’s Barge was streaming down his face. He went back to the Slat and dragged himself up all of the stairs—his newest office was Per Haskell’s, on the bottom floor, but he still kept the one in the attic. It was their room. He picked the door open and then opened it and slid against it and looked at the window.

He could see her there, feeding the crows. Laughing, smiling, facing him. Come on, Kaz. I know they’ll love you. Living things hate me. I don’t hate you. Thank you, darling. She’d been magic. He’d felt it all drain from him—money, vengeance, Jordie’s voice. He’d been surrounded by nothing but her.

Kaz sat against his door and he didn’t move. He cried. He’d made his bed in this room for her last night. The cabinet at the side had some of her clothes. He had her toothbrush. They hadn’t made it that far but they’d been able to sleep in a bed across from each other, holding hands, waking up to see each other.

He'd never kissed her.

He’d never told her he loved her.

And now she was—

Kaz got up. He walked to his desk and took out a pen and a piece of paper and he wrote to Nina. He didn’t know what he was asking for. Can you come? Can you give me one more chance? Can I—

He threw it into the trash. He swallowed. He knew Nina couldn’t bring back the dead. He needed to tell Inej that he loved her. What if she hadn’t known? Why hadn’t he told her before? You are so weak, Kaz Brekker. What kind of man couldn’t tell his girl what she meant to him? And now she was gone.

Now everything was gone. Something knocked at his door. Someone called for him. Jesper or Wylan. Kaz could only see hazily. His locks would hold them. He reached for his safe and pulled out a stack of letters. I think the Slat gets cold, she’d written, wouldn’t your leg fare better in another part of town? She’d written: do you think we could stay in another district, Kaz? Do you think we could ever be more than Dirtyhands and his Wraith?

“Yes,” he said aloud. He had never spoken to Jordie’s ghost, nor his father’s or mother’s. This felt the same and different. He wondered if she was here with him. Would she be with him?

Jesper was pounding at his door. “Kaz!”

He read the letter. He read the letter a thousand times. He soaked up everything. I think I’ve grown a fondness for paintings from Shu Han. They have such an interesting quality to them. He’d stolen one from a mercher’s house two days ago. It was rolled up under his bed. The opposite of Heleen, if you will. There’s so much terrible in the world. I haven’t kept in much contact with Zoya. Let me know how she is when you get back, of course. I miss your terrible stew. Do you think we could visit Ravka next summer? I think if all goes well I’ll have three months at home.

She’d signed off: Yours, Inej.

Kaz read the letter a thousand times, a million. He read it until those words were imprinted in his mind. Then he threw it out his window and watched it fall. Then he fell.

“You need to tell her parents,” Wylan said gently. Kaz sat still. He felt glassy. He hadn’t moved in hours. “We can push off the ceremony till they come. She said she wanted to be cremated and then placed into Fifth Harbor."

Kaz’s voice did not creak. “She said?”

Wylan nodded. Then he handed Kaz a piece of paper, something limp, a page broken off a map. “Specht said this was for you. They didn’t open it.”

Kaz took it and kept staring forward. Wylan took in a deep breath. “I’d ask if you’re okay.”

“Why aren’t you?”

“I can only imagine. What do you need?”

“Merchlings to leave me alone.”

Wylan left the study and turned to look at him with a sad frown. “Don’t do anything stupid, Kaz. It’s not what she would have wanted.”

Kaz Brekker always had a reason. It was how he’d built the Slat from nothing.

Kaz Rietveld no longer had a reason.

I coddle my grudges, Kaz thought. He was in his room. He stared into the mirror and then at his hands. They were ungloved, pale and clean and dirty. I treat them with respect and let them have minds of their own. I let justice right itself.

He could almost see a face in the mirror, behind him, cloaked. He wanted to turn to her, to see Inej. She wasn’t coming back. Why did you leave me here? a part of him thought. I’m alone. What do I do now?

He had nobody left. Not that he wanted anybody. He looked into the mirror and saw something else behind him. He was not alone.

Death serves no man, Jordie had said. Kaz had proved him wrong, or thought he had.

“I won,” he said into the mirror, at the ghost behind him who wasn’t there. “Greed bows to me, and death will too. I won. There has to be a way. If I won then, I can find a way now. You’re with me. Let her be with me.”

“I am not her. That wasn’t the fight. You know it.”

Some part of Kaz had always known that he would come out of his youth unscathed. He could say that in retrospect, but he genuinely felt it—luck, risks, the cards were on his side of the game. He didn’t believe in gods, but perhaps something—someone—had been watching over him. Or perhaps he’d truly mastered the art of thinking ten steps before everyone else, of trading in information. Perhaps he was human and it was all his mind. But Dirtyhands could not bring back the dead.

“Yes it was,” he said. The shade behind him laughed. Jordie was always so cruel to him.

“Oh, no,” it crooned. “You have not won. You will be alone always and then you will die. Death serves no man, Kaz Rietveld.”

Inej’s parents came. Kaz didn’t talk to them. He had no words to say. He watched her cremation from a roof.

He had the paper in his pocket. He hadn’t read it. If he was to open it, it would be the end. There would be no coming back.

He opened it. It had four words. He closed it and tucked it into his shirt’s pocket. His breath caught for a final time. He jumped off the roof and his knee buckled. He had been next to this same building when he’d heard Inej’s cries and gone to pick her up six years ago. He’d called her an investment. He choked. He saw Inej’s parents release her into the ocean. He went back to the Slat.

Kaz Rietveld no longer had a reason. He ignored Anika and Pim. He went to his room and sat at his window. He reached under his bed and threw the Shu painting out of the window. He made sure Inej’s side of the bed was neat. He opened his cabinet’s left drawer and took out two loaves of bread. He tossed those outside of the window too.

Do you believe in magic, Kaz? It’s all just tricks. You know that, I know that. I don’t think it’s all tricks. You’re not normal, Kaz. The way you do it—it isn’t normal. Don’t tell me you think that I’ve got magic hands? Kaz! Inej. Come here. That night he’d unbraided her hair. He’d laid her down to sleep. She’d kissed his cheek.

Six months and I’ll be seeing you again. Tell me you’ll miss me. I’ll miss you. Oh, progress? There’s no reason to hide truths. No games, Inej. I’ll miss you too. Once a week? Once a week. Write in more detail, too. I know more happens to you than you say. Jesper writes to me too, you know. Get some sleep, Wraith. Wake me up before you go.

She hadn’t. He’d slept to her hand in his. He looked to his bed now. If he closed his eyes he could see her. He looked at the crows. He thought about magic.

He unlocked his desk and took out a pistol. She’d had it made for him in Novyi Zem. There were crows embedded onto it. He’d never used it.

Kaz Rietveld no longer had a reason. He closed his eyes and pressed the pistol to one side of his head.

I think I’d like to live somewhere else. Wouldn’t it be nice? To escape the city and spend my old age in the countryside? I think I’ll die young. And I think you’ll cheat death. Living is what’s hard, Kaz. Remember that.

Do you believe in magic? I think you’re magic. I think we’re magic.

“I love you,” he whispered. When he opened his eyes she wasn’t there. “I’ll be there for you.”

He almost pressed the trigger. He didn’t press the trigger. He went to his desk and sat down. He pulled out four words from his pocket.

Kaz. Live for me.

He put the pistol away. He swallowed. He held Sankt Petyr to his chest and prayed to whatever god would grant her good fortune.

#kanej #getting back to tumblr so i needed to archive some stuff sagfkasjf #six of crows #crooked kingdom #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #tw character death #tw suicide mention #tw suicide #shadow and bone #dee drabbles #dee writes #kanej fic

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ornamental-coral · 3 years

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Do you have houses combos you love besides Snake Bird ?

Hi sorry it’s take me so long to get to you ‘nonnie human you. I promise if anyone sends me questions, I will get to them eventually! It just takes a while for me thinking about them, researching about them (doing Birdy Bird things with even a one-sentence question...), forgetting I have a sort-hat-chats centered tumblr account (which is... can sort of a Bird thing but also a me thing), and then coming back so we are here (there. somewhere)

I myself am a Snake-Bird. I think I’m pretty neat. Birds are usually very good at entertaining themselves. I think. And I’m lucky I like myself enough because I spend a lot of time with me haha.

I’m a little in love with a remarkable amount of Lion primaries, Snake secondaries and Bird primaries (especially with a Snake secondary to make them extra hard to hold onto *rolls eyes) and apparently I love writing Badger Primaries? I guess I find the challenge of building an “ideal” society that is willing to address the current failings of our timeline a worthwhile challenge and my ink-children rise from the ether to meet me.

I’ve expanded below bar because this is actually a really interesting concept to me - how does a particular house combination react to the others. Below is just my meandering through how specifically My Snake Primary Bird secondary might react on a surface level to the other house types. This doesn’t mean I’m right. There are as many ways of acting within the house system as there are human beings and keep in mind, this is all in good fun.

____________________

Lions

The Idealism of the Lion Primary is something that I find admirable. I posted a more extended musing on the position of Snake Birds within media here. I think the Snake in me understands that when you pick up a person the way Snakes do, you pick up a lot of their wants and regrets too. Snakes pick up People, so that means the whole package. A Lion with a worthy cause can be a very attractive thing to a Snake, who will follow and support them in a very specific kind of way.

With Double Lions, and Lion Snakes there’s that urge to run after them with a fire-extinguisher in one hand and a big stick in the other - one to put out the fires a Double Lion inevitably lights and the Lion Snake may try purposefully to stoke, and the other to beat off anyone who dares to tell your Lion that they cannot Be A Lion. That’s something only the Snake can do, and that’s only because no matter what the Snake says, the Lion is still Their Person warts and all and the Snake Bird knows damn well what they were getting into, or at least thought they did.

Lion Birds house-match secondaries with Snake Birds but can have explosively different moral codes, largely because they method match. I personally find some Lion Bird characters a little grating because as the audience, I feel I’m getting the same information as the Lion, but as a Snake I have a little too much self-preservation to imagine myself doing anything much about it - at least not the way a majority of Lion Bird characters act - or I come to different conclusion. I also hate conspiracy theories because they require leaps of logic the my Bird model typically just can’t tolerate but the felt-house Lion will participate in. However, Lion Birds can also be the hard-boiled PIs, the Best-at-their-Job secret agents (hi Agent Coulson), the one who has Seen the World and Still Believes It Can Be Saved. So that’s admirable and fun.

Lion Badgers are sweet but my Snake Bird goes “fires, fires everywhere”. And like, not the kind your Lion Snake might think is funny when the Snake Bird tries to put them out. Think Steve Rodgers. MCU Steve has a really strong Snake Performance though when it comes to Bucky which MY Snake finds really confusing because it is So Strong I’d be willing to be money he would have at least tried to find a better way to get rid of the Tesseract if Bucky hadn’t fallen from that train and been declared KIA. I think that particular type of Snake performance also confuses Tony, which is part of why Civil War was the way it was.

But yeah, a fire that a Lion Badger wants to light? it’s not going to go out. For a Snake, having that as Your Person means you either really ride or die for them - and might actually literally have to die, or you are keeping them from burning themselves out before they accomplish whatever they’re doing. For a Snake Bird? this is alarming as hell and it’s a fight between the Secondaries to make sure the Lion takes care of themselves as part of the Lion’s “hard work” Badger, if they’re your person.

Birds

Bird primaries will “build” the people they love into the way they see the world. As a Snake, I think this is just really appealing to me? Snakes are loyal, and older Snakes have the life experience to realize that - painful as it is - this loyalty will not always be reciprocated in the way you hope for (this is the stereotypical bone of contention between Lions, Badgers and Snakes. Lions are focused on their cause and if the Snake’s protective instincts get in the way of that, that causes problems It also hurts when a Lion’s mission supersedes their affection for their Snake people. Badgers’ concerns are for their communities and the split of attention can drive the individually focused Snake crazy). If you get built into the Bird’s world, that always felt like something special and something that took hard work, which made it all the more valuable.

My Snake Birds also likes to imagine it’s equipped to learn to the things that a Bird variety believes in and address those things. It’s the kind of relationship that has the potential to go very wrong, and I do realize that. I think Snake Birds have the tendency to want to be everything for Their Person (or people) and our powers of observation mean that we take it a little personally when we’ve missed something. I’m tempted to call Kaz Brekker of Six of Crows a Snake Bird and it drives him to distraction that he can’t be everything, everywhere, all at once to the handful of a people he truly and deeply cares about.

The Bird Snake in particular house matches in a way that can be particularly challenging and attractive to a Snake Bird? A Snake Bird’s tool is, well, the Bird, and the whole persona can feel ridiculously pleased by being able to “pin down” the Bird Snake, which does not necessarily lend itself to being pinned. There’s also this strong urge to understand the Bird Snake.

So there’s the Snake secondary who delights in finding new ways to be, and a Bird Secondary delights in learning new things. The discovery element in that relationship can, as long as the Bird Secondary is not stifled by the Snake Primary’s concern, actually be really rewarding. Birds, and Bird Snakes in particular are also often really unique. They think differently, act differently, can be off putting to certain types of house combinations because their moral code can come off is so blue-orange, and is Built on top of that. Snakes take great pride in being very “this is my Person and their brand of weirdness is just another thing I love about them. And on top of that, I Know them.” with their people in any situation, and if a Snake can eventually prove to their Bird Primary that that feeling is unwavering, that’s a relationship that becomes central to both Snake and Bird.

That isn’t to say Birds can’t go dark, but usually they learn to be that way given Birds are evidence-gatherers. Unfortunately, this means I love them too because people of my generation and all generations before and hence have a thing for characters with trauma (see Loki, greasy prince extraordinaire). It’s -- it’s never not been a thing. Take a look at freaking Gilgamesh, which is the oldest things that we know of, look at Enkidu, and tell me he wasn’t your favorite. Gilgamesh is kind an arschloch of highest proportions. As a more palatable example of this Bird-villain thing, I sort of suspect Bucky Barnes is a Bird of some flavor. If he killed one person as the Winter Soldier, he’d feel bad but probably admit it was the brain washing - but he did it dozens of times. He wonders what does this say about him? He is possibly a Badger, but even pre-winter-soldier he doesn’t seem to care on as wide a scale as a Badger typically does. Steve is Built into the fabric of his world, and he doesn’t react to Steve’s death the way I expect a Snake to either. Maybe a really Old Seasoned Snake and I mean technically he’s old? but the cryogenics thing sort of means he’s not old enough to just let it go. He also doesn’t follow the boy from Brooklyn for reasons I would expect from a fellow Snake but I guess the new show might give more insight on that once I actually watch it.

Badgers

Okay, I like writing Badgers. [Leans back on chaise lounge] this probably has something to do with my mother.

Really though. I model Badger because my mother, although I love her and I’m really lucky to have her, is a teeny tiny bit horrified by Snake tendencies and drilled into me the morality that it is okay and it is above all Good to care about other people (for other Snakes, read Yes Even Strangers). To be fair, the prioritizing that Snakes do (which can get as focused as ”My people first, even if someone else far away is in trouble and I am acutely aware of it”) can seem pretty horrific to a Badger. They don’t necessarily get how you could believe everyone is a person and just... not care. And it’s hard to convince a Badger (for whom not acting can = they are not worth it) that you know exactly what you’re doing but are also aware that if you try to help everyone your head will explode because you can’t keep that many People up there. It’s why Snakes have their rings of caring.

But the result is that for me, Badgers are usually the ones left standing at the end of the story. If they’re done dirty, I like to try and fix it.

I don’t like how media treats Badger primaries generally though? There’s often something “goofy” or the Badger is treated as soft in a really unpalatable way. I mean, and to be fair this directly comes from the way a Snake can sort of be flummoxed with the way Badgers just do things for strangers, yes Badgers irl may be considered gentle. On an individual level, they are often the hearts and hearths of groups and homes. But there’s this weird place where The State is supposed to be a Badger-shaped institution, so that uneasy balance comes out in weird ways.

I don’t remember who said it, but the difference with Badgers and Snakes is that, with a Snake, you start out at Zero. You’re human, but you’re not the Snake’s human, so I will treat you like a human, but there are My People above you. And with a Badger, you sort of start out at like 85-100%? At least this is my perception. Badgers need-base and that off-balances Snakes.

A Snake with a Badger in my opinion needs to be “eyes open” in a different way than even a Snake with a Bird does, because the Snake needs to understand that the Badger is going to look and act similar - until they don’t, and then the Snake needs to be able to put aside the part of them that was attracted to the mirrored morality and actually work with the Badger to figure out what the Snake needs and how the Snake can in turn support the Badger.

Anyways though, I’m writing a thing where a Badger Bird-modeling-Badger is the last woman standing, committed to fixing a broken type of organization that her Snake, Bird, and Lion companions are Tired of. Lady Badger is nothing if not resilient. I’m writing another thing where a really really Burnt Badger man gets a safe place to learn to be part of a community that is meant to be mutually protective again (he dies because this is a fan work and that’s what happened in cannon, and this is arguably because he’s still unburning at that stage and doesn’t Have a proper community, but I hope to show him having at least Some happy times because in the sh**show show he didn’t have any at all). I’ve got a slightly less developed thing where a number of Badger performing princes learn to work together to fix their kingdom and unbury the history that created it.

Aaand It’s nearing midnight, I have clearly lost the thread of the thread or whatever

Goodniiight to all my houses. Love you all even if I didn’t write about you here.

-Ornamental

#ornamental answers #ask answered #snake primary #bird secondary #House interactions #lion primary #Bird Primary #badger primary #wip sorts #late night posts #sortinghatchats

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cdkwrites · 3 years

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fall from grace (6)

From ancient grudge break to new mutiny, where civil blood makes civil hands unclean

When Atem from one of the high houses of Hell is discovered dying in the streets of 1920s Paris by a mysteriously kind angel, tensions of this old war spark when she elects to save his life. The devastating fall out of one simple act of kindness is more than enough to shatter the truce. Soon, it maybe be impossible to avoid the resulting war for all species on Earth.

What here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend

——-

cw: mentions of blood, self harm (kind of? there’s no scarring involved, it’s more like Allowing Oneself To Starve To Death), suicide idealization (nothing worse than you’d read in canon ygo), some artistic license re: european history espeically re: the french, violence

chapter one. chapter two. chapter three. chapter four. chapter five.

you can read it on ao3 here!

if you enjoy my work, considering supporting me through ko-fi!

From an interview with Katsuya Jonouchi, 1900s “I don’t know what to tell you. I was with Honda when all that happened.”

Dartz was on warpath. Jonouchi almost felt bad for Keket, who was currently the subject of Dartz’s rage. “Seems like Ket let that vampire go again,” Honda said as he joined Jonouchi in Jonouchi’s usual hiding spot. No one knew better than Honda how much Jonouchi disliked Dartz’s moods. “No wonder Dartz is angry.”

“I don’t get it,” Jonouchi said as he examined the terrain below them. High above the clouds, the mortals couldn’t see them but they could see the mortals. Jonouchi could understand why Dartz spent all his time in places like this. Mortal watching could be kind of fun at times. “What spell does that demon have over Keket? She’s normally so smart.”

“Enough about her,” Honda said as he waved off the discussion. Jonouchi turned to him, a brow raised. “How is Shizuka? Isn’t she your responsibility?”

Shizuka was Jonouchi’s latest charge and she was more than a handful. And yet Jonouchi already viewed her as a little sister. “She’s got her own ideas on how to be an angel,” Jonouchi said with an annoyed look on his face. Mortals souls that became angels all seemed to think they had everything figured out. “Unfortunately, guiding her has proven difficult.”

“I imagine so,” Honda said. Honda had already dealt with his own charge a few thousand years ago. He had claimed it had been one of the easiest things to do and that it was so rewarding. It had been part of why Jonouchi had been so willing to take on a charge of his own. “Some mortals who pass have a relatively big head that they take from life into the next form. Why, do you have issues with her?”

Jonouchi shrugged. He knew he should report that Shizuka asked just a little too many questions but he couldn’t bring himself to. He wondered if he had once been mortal, he’d have the same outlook on forever that Shizuka had. Shizuka had been horrified to learn that this was how her afterlife was to be spent and had asked if there were other options. Jonouchi did not know. “No,” he said, squashing the guilt aside from lying to Honda. “There’s no problem.”

He wondered if Honda saw through it.

From the journal of Sumiko Kubota: December 2, 1922, Paris I think my sister is being entirely too difficult. Surely there’s plenty of reason to stick around this shop. And not simply because Duke is utterly fascinating…

Sumiko hadn’t planned on staying in Paris. But Duke fascinated her so much that she had to stay for just a little bit longer. Sure, Kazuko was annoyed the longer they stayed but for once, Sumiko didn’t care. She was learning a lot about the world that her sister stumbled into. Duke spent most of his time either running the store front or in the kitchen.

Today she found him in a new place, however. Sumiko wasn’t sure how to describe the room she’d found herself in. For a minute, anyway. It was like the room was coming into sharp view, as if it had been hidden from her. All the bookcases went right to the ceiling and there was an ornate wooden table in the center of the room. He was humming and Sumiko was struck by how pretty he looked. He seemed relaxed. He looked from the book he’d had open on a podium and grinned. “Why, Sumiko,” Duke said as he gestured towards the chairs around the table. “I see you’ve found the library.”

This was not like any library Sumiko had ever been in. There was this sense that she was not supposed to be in here. And yet Sumiko pressed forward into the room, focusing on Duke. “I didn’t know this place existed.”

“The more time you spend in the supernatural, the more you become in tune with it,” Duke said as he turned to pull a book off the shelf behind him. “Most mortals have an innate sense of magic but spend their whole lives unaware of it. I figured eventually I would see you here.”

“But I was able to see the shop,” Sumiko said as Duke placed the book in front of her. It was in a language she couldn’t read. It was possible it was in French but Sumiko thought the writing looked too different from the signs in the area to be the same language. “Is there a reason for that?”

“Yugi has it set up so people who have had a single strange encounter with the mystical can see the shop,” Duke explained as he took a seat next to Sumiko with a sly grin on his face. Again Sumiko was reminded of a predator who had found its next meal. “However, the shop is so much larger than any mortal who is just dipping their toes into the supernatural can possibly imagine.”

“That reminds me,” Sumiko said, hesitant to ask the one thing she’d been curious about. “Why do you spend all your time here in this shop? Surely a demon such as yourself must get bored of it.”

Duke looked annoyed briefly. “I made a bet with Yugi a few years ago that if I lost a game to him, I’d be friends with him,” Duke said as he leaned back in his chair. “So now here I am, having to honor my end of the bargain. I still don’t know how he managed to win.”

“Powerful demon turned friend by a guy at least a foot shorter than you,” Sumiko remarked, a brow arching up. “How does that happen?”

“Must we talk about it,” Duke said with roll of his eyes. “I’d rather focus on teaching you some of the finer workings of magic.”

“You’re going to teach me magic?” Sumiko narrowed her eyes. “Kaz always says that nothing comes for free. What do you want?”

“That’s how mortals operate,” Duke said, sounding rather dismissive. “I’m not a mortal. I’m doing this out of the goodness of my heart.”

“Really?” Sumiko wasn’t sure she believed him. And yet, despite the fact it was a bad idea to make a deal with a demon, she found herself grinning. “I’ll trust you for now. But I’d be careful. My sister is mean and willing to go pretty far to protect me.”

“I wouldn’t dream of hurting you, Sumiko Kubota,” Duke said and Sumiko felt strange realizing she believed him. Trusting a demon with her life seemed like the worst kind of mistake she could make. And yet, with those brilliant emerald like eyes that sparkled with promise, how could Duke be anything but an angel?

From the logs of Rafael, soldier of Destiny, keeper of Justice:1900s Master Dartz seems keenly aware that there is a growing problem with Keket. I am unsure if this is the correct solution, however. Yet I know that asking questions merely leads to more problems….

Rafael wanted to ask Keket if all this was worth it. He never thought she’d lose her mind over some demon. And yet she was. Three times now Keket had failed to kill the vampire. Dartz was pacing the length of the room and the anger radiating off him. “There has to be a way to deal with this,” Dartz muttered, clearly not expecting any answers from Rafael. Rafael glanced towards the multiple views of Earth. One of the views was fixated directly on Keket, who hadn’t moved from her house on Earth since the incident. “She has gotten far too attached to this vampire.”

“Surely we can take him out,” Rafael said, confused as to why Dartz simply wouldn’t just order him to deal with it. Rafael still owed Keket. She’d saved his life in that battle so many eons ago. He recalled how she’d moved with grace through that battlefield. “I can do it. I owe her one.”

“Yes, you do,” Dartz said with a side glance at Rafael. Instantly Rafael felt like he’d made a misstep. Dartz seemed to prize strength and many times, Rafael felt he came up short. Perhaps that was why he was itching to prove he was capable. “But would you even be capable of helping her? Perhaps you might need to start with a smaller target.”

And a file appeared out of nowhere, landing at Rafael’s feet. Rafael hesitated for a moment before picking it up. Instantly, he recognized the demon that Dartz was suggesting. “This is that vampire’s father,” Rafael said, almost stunned. The name had been what Rafael read first - Akhenamkhanen. It would be impossible to forget that name. “How is this a smaller target?”

“I thought you were strong,” Dartz remarked with a strange inflection in his tone. “But if you’re too weak for the task, I’m certain one of the other angels could take care of it.”

Rafael looked at the file again. A demon who was king of his realm, who had been alive for thousands of years. It was a task that even the best of angels would struggle with. He tried to imagine himself actually doing the act. “No,” Rafael said as he passed the file back. “I can do it.”

Still, the rumblings of regret were already starting to build in Rafael’s chest. Doubt coursed through him. But what choice did he have?

From the journals of Anzu Mazaki: Paris, December 23, 1922 Bakura arrived at the theater today. I had been unaware that he even knew where I worked. Curiously, however, I found myself not minding that he had shown up…

The candles were such a dim light to read by, Anzu thought absently. She held the script closer, trying to read the words on the page but not really absorbing them. Her mind was elsewhere. She was focused heavily on remembering the last time Bakura had come around. Her cheeks flushed as she remembered that his hands were sure and the smirk he’d worn. “Miss Gardner,” came a voice like silk from behind her. She glanced up into the mirror, already knowing that she wouldn’t see him reflected back at her. The shadows moved in the mirror, however, and this gave her an idea of where he was. “Shouldn’t you have memorized that already?”

“Maybe I should,” Anzu said, grinning as she turned to face Bakura. White paired so lovely with his skin tone, she thought to herself. She’d never say that out loud to him, though. He had a big enough ego as it was. Then again… “What’s it to you what I have memorized?”

“Why, Anzu,” Bakura said, sounding wounded as he reached out to cup her cheek. His finger rubbed along her lower lip and her lips parted slightly. “You know I deeply care about what goes on in your mundane mortal life.”

“Do you?” She liked the dangerous glint in his eye that he got every time she challenged him. She leaned forward, tilting her head up to give him a hint that she wanted him to kiss her. “Is this why you won’t tell me how to become a vampire? You’d miss my stories of my mortal life?”

“No,” Bakura admitted as he pulled Anzu into a standing position. He yanked her closer to him, his hand wrapped around her wrist. “But because it's a rather scary story.” His grin promised something dark and it thrilled Anzu to her very core. “Can you handle that?”

“I can handle just about anything you throw my way, darling,” she said, unsure where that came from. He was so close and his teeth were so near her neck. Near enough to take a bite out of her. “I want to know everything about you.”

His hand was under her jaw, a finger tracing out her jawline. He yanked her back to him and Anzu let out a soft gasp. Her head tilted, allowing him access. Her arm was pinned behind her back and yet she felt no fear. Being bound by him was thrilling. A veneer of having no choice and yet… Anzu would rather be in no other position. She knew he’d let go if she merely said one word - just one. “Do you?” Bakura asked, his lips pressing to her neck. “I would think you’d be done with talking by now.”

She was tempted to say that of course she was done with talking before reality sat back in. “You promised me a scary story,” Anzu said softly, doing her best to ignore how his strong hands felt so nice on her. “I want to know - how does one become a vampire?”

Bakura stilled. For a moment, Anzu wondered if he would leave her frustrated and in need of release. “It’s not pretty,” he finally said. “You mortals have such romantic notions. I’m trying to protect you, Anzu.”

He so rarely used her name. The last time he used it, he had been warning her that she should go find a mortal boy instead. She’d insisted then she didn’t care about the potential heartbreak they could face. He’d merely smiled and said it was on her own head if she got in that deep. “What if I don’t want to be protected?”

A heartbeat passed and he released her arm. She was almost disappointed until his hand was placed on her hip. His forehead pressed against her shoulder and he let out a weary sigh. “You aren’t going to let this go, are you?”

“No.”

“Fine,” he said and Anzu couldn’t pin down his tone. “I was turned thousands of years ago. It was a mistake, of course. Akhandin never meant to turn me. I was a poor thief who no one would miss. He stole me and my mother in the dead night from our village.” He sounded far away and Anzu felt a surge of affection. She tried to picture Bakura as human. Then she tried to picture what Bakura’s mother might look like. “The blood was drained from the bodies and stored in jars for later consumption.”

He spun her around, staring deep into her eyes. Anzu wondered if his eyes were always blood red like that. “So does that mean part of becoming a vampire involves being drained of blood?”

“Yes but there’s a particular order,” Bakura said with a sly smirk. “I fought back and got a bit of Akhandin. Turns out, because I got a bit of him… it was enough to start the change.” He leaned forward, a dangerous glint in his eyes. His teeth glinted somehow in the lowlight. “Can you guess what that bit of him it was?”

Anzu raised a brow. “You tell me,” she said, trying her best to not sound breathless. Already she had a hunch and was trying to picture the process. “I’ve just stumbled my way into the supernatural, remember?”

He took her hand in his and pressed a quick kiss to the inside of her wrist. “Blood, my dear,” he said, his tongue pressed against her skin. “I managed to bite him hard enough to take blood. And when that happened, why… him draining me of blood set the wheels of fate in motion. My heart ceased beating and when I awoke, I was filled with thirst.” There was now a manic glint in his eyes. “So thirsty… I drank all the jars he’d stored for later. He hadn’t been expecting to find me there. I fled.”

“What about your mother?” It was, on the surface, an innocent question. However, the pained look on his face told another story. Her stomach dropped. “Bakura?”

“I didn’t know at the time,” he said, as if looking for absolution from her. Anzu had never seen this look on Bakura’s face before. She’d seen so many ways to be looked at but this face… It was almost worshipful. Like a sinner pleading for mercy from a crucifix. “At the time… I was just… so thirsty, Anzu.” He was gripping her hand so tight. “I didn’t know he’d already drained her. And I didn’t… I was a coward.”

The pieces clicked together and Anzu stumbled back. She landed in her chair and he was kneeling before her, begging for her to understand. Of course she understood. “It’s not like you meant to,” she said, reaching out to cup his jaw. “Does that mean… when you’re turned…”

“It’s like an animal taking over you,” Bakura said, leaning against her touch. “The pain, too… It’s more than just a desire for blood. It destroys you. Can’t you see now? I want to spare you that pain, Anzu.”

From the journal of Prince Atem, domain of vampires: London, January 1st, 1923 I hate that angel. I wish she’d never entered my life. She’s ruined it forever.

The phone rang twice before Atem answered it. “Hey,” Atem answered as he examined his throat. He was surprised that there wasn’t even a scar. It was like nothing had happened. “This is Atem. May I ask who’s calling?”

“Atem, it’s Mahad,” came the voice from the other end of the line. Atem straightened up. Mahad typically didn’t call unless it was important. “Before you hang up, I promise that I’m not calling to drag you back to the palace.”

“You wound me, brother,” Atem said, distracted by the shattered pieces of mirror still all over the floor. He needed to take care of it but couldn’t bring himself to. He was obsessing. That angel had entered his home and attacked him violently. And he was obsessed, wondering why she’d done it. “I would never hang up on you.”

“You hung up on me last time I called,” Mahad pointed out, sounding weary already. Instantly Atem felt bad. The last time Mahad called, Atem was just a little too frustrated. He wouldn’t have hung up otherwise. “That’s not what I’m calling about though, young prince.”

“Are you trying to get me to hang up on you?”

“Not at all,” Mahad said and Atem could almost hear the smile in Mahad’s voice. “Merely showing respect, young prince.” A beat passed before he hesitantly continued, “However… something has come up that you need to know.”

“Need to know,” Atem remarked as he picked up the bloodied shard of mirror. She’d shoved it deep in his throat and attempted to hack him apart. He’d reacted by draining her blood mindlessly. And her blood had created a surge through him that he hadn’t known was possible. Was that not something he needed to know? “That reminds me, I have something I need to ask.”

“This is more important,” Mahad said and Atem noticed that he was trying too hard to sound gentle. There was no teasing, no ribbing. The last time Mahad had been this gentle, Atem found himself in mourning. He somehow knew what Mahad was going to say before he said it. “Your father is dead, young prince.”

And just like that, Atem’s entire world was tilted on its axis. “Father’s dead?”

#fic: fall from grace

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bellatrixobsessed1 · 3 years

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Protea (Part 13)

She avoids Mohi’s if only to avoid distressing Kaz any further. She pretends like she is busy and overwhelmed by her very first job. That she needs to focus on it so she doesn’t mess it up lie the last few jobs she’s had. Mohi and Zenyul trust her whole heartedly. It hurts terribly. She doesn’t deserve that kind of trust.

She knows it. Kaz knows it.

And so she spends most of her time at the palace and with Mai, hoping that Mohi doesn’t resent her fro growing distant. She thinks that maybe it is some sort of defense. To create that distance. To show herself out before they can show her out.

Working with Mai and tending to the flowers is a welcome distraction. Mostly she doesn't think too much about Kaz.

Mostly she doesn't think about him until he enters the shop. She is at the back of the shop, poking seeds into soil when Mai calls, "your brother is here."

For one small moment she thinks that Mai is referring to Zuko and her heart gives an anxious leap. She finishes patting the soil over the seed and wanders up to the front.

"Oh. Hi Kaz." She can't even manage to feel slightly enthusiastic to see him.

"Did you guys have a fight or something?" Mai asks in a whisper.

"I think."

"How can you not tell? Either you had a fight or you didn't."

But she isn't good with feelings, isn't good at understanding them. "I'm not mad at him." She replies.

"But he's mad at you?"

Snapdragon nods.

"I can finish planting the seeds if you two need a minute or you can step outside."

Snapdragon nods again.

Mai finishes handing her last customer his flowers and disappears into the back of the shop. Snapdragon brushes her fingers over nearby petals. "I made a bouquet for Mohi's birthday.” “And?”

"I want to come home for Mohi's birthday."

"Is that a demand or a question, princess." He sneers.

"A...request?" Snapdragon replies. "I made an arrangement with her favorite flowers." She holds up a bouquet of fake jasmine, daisy, clover, and yarrow. She will replace those with genuine flowers on Mohi's birthday. Around the boy she has tied a few yellow and white painted beads and brown and white bird feathers that she had found in her hoard. "Can you give it to her?"

"Give it to her yourself when you visit on her birthday." The way that he extends the invitation is anything but kind. It makes her think that, maybe, a silly bouquet might not be good enough. That maybe a pouch of gold coins would be a better gift. Mohi could start reclaiming the life she had sacrificed for Snapdragon. For the woman that shouldn't exist.

She watches Kaz sulk away. She never finds out what he had come there to tell her.

.oOo.

With the passing of several days, her mind has mostly sorted itself out. Snapdragon and Azula coexist well enough with Azula--as per usual--taking dominance. She attributes this mostly to the stresses and sorrows that Azula is prone to coming back in full force. They stir about in her mind until Snapdragon’s joy and enthusiasm is swept away.

But Azula finds that she rather enjoys the freedoms that Snapdragon has found for her. The ability to speak as she will and do what she will without the fear of tarnishing an immaculate reputation. She still very much enjoys being around Mohi. Mohi who ruffles her hair and gives her the affection she wishes that her own mother would afford her. Her own mother who she has seen about the palace several times now. Her own mother who loves Snapdragon more than she could ever love Azula. She is just one more reason to feign ignorance and keep up her facade.

Really, it isn’t too hard. She thinks that Snapdragon is everything and all of the freedom that she had yearned for. And now she has it. Maybe all along Snapdragon, minus eating flowers and rolling in dirt, has been the real her. The real her that she has buried so deeply. The real her that has been hindered and bogged down by crushing expectations and loneliness.

She is terrified that this loneliness will come creeping back in. Kaz hasn’t warmed up to her any and Zenyul always sides with his brother.

She is more desperate to keep their affection that she would like to admit. Desperate to keep the family she has found and the little joys. She supposes that she wasn’t thinking clearly. Had she been thinking clearly, she wouldn’t have gotten caught. Had her mind not been so fixated on salvaging her relationship with Kaz. Fixated on keeping everything from falling apart completely.

.oOo.

It is Kaz who opens the door and he tries to shut it in her face. But she didn’t walk all of that distance just to be shut out. “I said you can come for Mohi’s birthday, no other day.” Kaz grumbles, he gives the door another heave. Azula holds her ground.

“Just let ‘er in, Kaz.” Zenyul sighs.

He releases his hold so suddenly that she nearly loses her footing.

“What’s goin’ on ‘tween you two anyways?”

Azula shrugs while Kaz grumbles, “don’t worry about it.”

Mohi makes her way into the foyer, apron tied tightly around her waist, face smeared with flour and dough. Azula mood lifts if only slightly. “Where ya be at chil’.” She frowns. “Ya git yerself a job ‘n we don’t never see ya.”

“Kaz doesn’t want me here anymore.” She doesn’t particularly want to cause problems for him but she also doesn’t want Mohi to think that she has forgotten about her. “He was here first so I’ve been staying with Mai.”

Zenyul scoffs, “you’re talkin’ like one’a them nobles.”

Her tummy flutters, how is it that he can manage to make the extravagance of palace life sound so ugly and foul? “I brought a souvenir.” She slips her hand into her pocket and draws out a small coin pouch. She holds it out to Mohi. “It’s enough to buy a place in the…uh, in the less rough area of Caldera.”

Mohi’s eyes go wide and she clamps her hand around Azula’s wrist.

“Oh chil’ no. Ya didn’t steal this did ya?”

Technically she didn’t. It belongs to her whether or not the palace guard recognizes her. But it doesn’t belong to Snapdragon and right now she is Snapdragon. “They won’t know.” She thinks that they have so much wealth anyways that a couple of coins would go completely unnoticed.

“Chil’ ya swiping hands is gon’ git ya in trouble.” She looks terrified. “Why ya go ‘n do this?”

She shrugs. “You were supposed to live well. You were doing fine until I got here.” She notices Kaz grimace.

Mohi cuffs Kaz on the back of the head. Kaz and Zenyul both. “I oughtta give ya a good swat too, girl! Ya should know betta then takin’ from the royal family!” She slaps the coins back into Azula’s palm. “Ya go ‘n take this back.”

“But you need it.”

“Not as much as we need ya here ‘n safe.”

Azula’s lower lip quivers. Even when she tries to do something good, she hurts people. She is beginning to recall more vividly why she had sought out the Mother of Faces to extract her memories, her face, her essence--everything that made her Azula.

“Kaz!”

The boy goes rigid.

“Why’d ya go ‘n say them thin’s to ‘er? Don’ tell me ya don’ wan’ ‘er around?”

Kaz seems to chew on his lips. “I were mad, okay?”

The imperial firebenders don’t knock. They just enter. Just as they have been trained to do. Azula feels absolutely sick. She thinks that one of the servants, likely Ami, had seen her slip out of the treasury. She wasn’t careful. She was foolish and impulsive. She has made things worse.

“I don’ think it’s okay.” Mohi shakes her head. She squeezes Azula’s hand. “Oh chil’, ya didn’t have ta do that.”

.oOo.

They handle her roughly. More roughly than even Snapdragon is used to. Snapdragon may have been lower class filth but she was never a criminal. She is a criminal now though and they have very little regard for her comfort. Her wrists are bruised from their grip and her knees are bruised and scraped from having been shoved to the floor of her new cell.

“I’ll admit, it takes nerves, a certain fire, to steal from the royal family.” One of the guards sneers.

“Never liked that one.” Says the other. “Never liked the glum one either.”

And she is left in darkness, with metal clamped around her hands and feet. It weighs them down so heavily that she thinks they may break. She lays with her cheek pressed against the chilly dirty floor.

She can tell them who she is, but she can’t imagine that they would believe her. They won’t let her show them her fire.

She believes that two or three days pass before she sees anyone aside from the guard delivering her sorry excuse for a meal. It is so terribly lonely and so dreadfully cold. She misses her freedom. At night she dreams of her factory, of making it to the very top.

She misses the wind in her hair as she leaps from building to building. It dawns on her that she hasn’t done parkour in a good long while. She had taken the simple life for granted. And now she is more restricted than she has ever been. She feels horrible for thinking so, but she wishes that she had never run into Mai again.

At one point she hears Mai arguing for them to let her see her girlfriend and she feels guilty twice over. “Wait until Zuko gets back, wait until he hears about this!” She had vowed. Azula can’t name another instance where Mai had been this passionate. It earns her no prize. No prize save for, “oh I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to hear that you brought a thief into the palace.”

Her stomach is rumbling softly by day five. They have neglected to feed her for the past few days. She begins to wonder if they plan on leaving her to die. She doesn’t remember any laws that punish thieves so steeply, but then she hadn’t really paid attention to exactly what penalties thieves, traitors, and murderers received.

The door to her cell opens. She doesn’t move. Even if she wanted to, the shackles keep her tethered to the floor. The light that spills onto her face is blinding after nearly a week without any light at all.

She doesn’t try to get up, even when the shackles clunk to the floor and away from her wrists and ankles. When she doesn’t move at all, the figure comes closer. She flinches as hands pull her to her feet. These hands are very gentle. Very caring. Those hands pull her into a little hug. “The coins were returned, I don’t see the point in keeping you in here.” Speaks a very familiar voice. “And treating you like this.” She detects a scowl in the woman’s voice. The same sternness that she usually addresses Azula with. But Snapdragon, as far as Ursa knows, is not Azula. And so her voice becomes light again, “let’s get you cleaned up and something to eat.”

Azula winces with each step. But she is very intent on simply walking it off. Walking it off, at least until her ankle twist and she buckles to the floor.

Her mother catches her and gives a wince of her own. “We’ll get you to the infirmary and then get you something to eat. We can get you cleaned up later.”

She scoops Azula up and Azula shakes her head. “I’m fine, I can walk myself.” She insists.

Ursa purses her lips. “Your ankles are very swollen, I shouldn’t have let you walk so soon.”

“I can walk, I’m not weak. I can…”

“Maybe you can.” Ursa smiles. “But you don’t have to. The sooner we get you to the infirmary, the sooner you will get to see Mai and--what was her name--Mohi?”

Azula nods, “Mohi isn’t in trouble, is she?”

“Mohi and her sons are safe.” Ursa replies as she lays Azula upon a vacant infirmary bed. She beckons for a doctor. “Why did you steal from the treasury, Snapdragon?”

“Mohi needed the coins.” She replies.

“Zuko is a generous Fire Lord, you could have asked him. You could have asked me.”

Maybe if Azula hadn’t resurfaced, she would have considered those to be options. Maybe if she didn’t forget that Zuko doesn’t have anything against Snapdragon… Maybe if Azula didn’t exist at all.

She closes her eyes.

Ursa sighs, “you like your independence, don’t you?”

She nods, supposing that, that is a part of it. Even if it is a small part.

And Ursa gives a small laugh. “I guess that, that’s a firebender’s curse. We can never just ask for help or talk about how we feel.” She takes Azula’s hand.

“I don’t know how to ask for help.” Azula admits. She knows that she needs it so badly and for so many reasons. But she doesn’t know how to request it. Even Snapdragon didn’t really know how to reach out…

Ursa gives her head a sad and small shake. “You’re quite different than her, but you remind me of my daughter.”

#Avatar The Last Airbender #Azula #Mai #Maizula #Fanfiction

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this-is-what-makes-us-fandoms · 5 years

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Bitter Feelings |Lab Rats: Elite Force|

Requested: Can I request a Kaz x reader imagine where she already knew and was friends with the Davenports before the Elite Force and everyone thought she liked Chase cause they were close friends and she has a very flirty persona but she humors him quite often ("yes Chase, an anti aging serum is exactly what you need) and comforts him when his plans fail, so during and after the "androids episode" she's in a sour mood because of Kaz not Chase? (Sorry this is so specific, thanks in advance have a good day!)

Pairing: Kaz x Reader, Platonic Chase x Reader

Warnings: None

Words: This bad boy is 4.9K

A/N: wow, I’m so sorry this took forever! I just wanted to make it perfect and I’m actually really happy with how it came out. That’s a rare thing for me to say. But I think it’s because I really polished this one up, it was a real mess when I first started. So, to the person who requested this, I hope you like it! Fun fact, I actually made the Kaz GIF, the other one belongs to its rightful owner.

Chase sprinted into the living room of the Penthouse, wide grin on his face as he barely contained his excitement. Bree and Skylar were sitting at the kitchen table, conversation stopped midway due to Chase’s sudden appearance. They exchanged looks with one another before looking back at him, wondering why he was in such high spirits.

“Why so happy Chase? Did you finally get a girl to talk to you?” Bree joked.

Immediately his grin fell and he looked at her with an ‘are you serious’ look which caused her and Skylar to laugh. “No... But it is the next best thing.”

“No, not for you,” Skylar teased.

“Will you just let me say my thing!” Chase raged, his reaction causing them to snicker.

“Alright what’s up?” Bree asked seriously this time.

“Me, I’m what’s up,” A familiar voice rang through.

You entered the living room, grinning widely and completely dismissing the cue Chase has set for you. You saw him throw his arms in the air in defeat, just letting you do whatever. You gave him a cheeky wink before you were engulfed in a tight hug. It took you by surprise, you had forgotten Bree had super-speed, but you managed to return the hug. When she pulled away, she was still wearing a look of complete shock which just made your grin widen.

“What are you doing here? How’re things back home? Oh my god, I can’t believe you’re here,” She cheered.

“I live here, er not here-here, but Davenport did get me my own apartment. I got accepted into Centium University and everything’s great!” You explained.

“Oh my god, that’s amazing! I’m so happy for you,” Bree pulled you into another hug, congratulating you on your success.

“Yup, and now you’re stuck with me for the next four years,” You grinned.

“Wait, what’s going on? Who is this?” A new voice asked.

You looked over to Skylar, approaching her and extending your hand out for a handshake. “You must be Skylar Storm, the alien superhero.”

“Superhero? I’m not a superhero, I’m bionic but not a superhero or an alien,” She answered, trying to deny what you already know.

“It’s cool, Chase told me everything, but don’t blame him. He kind of has to since I’m his best friend and all,” You told her. “Anyway, I’m {Name}, if you didn’t already know.”

“Oh, well, nice to meet you then,” She said.

You gave her a nod and smile, your own way of saying the same thing. “Hey, who’s this?” Another new voice spoke. You looked over to the source of the voice, seeing two guys coming down the stairs and into the living room where the four of you stood. One of them caught your eye immediately, black hair, cute eyes, adorable confused face. You made eye contact and you felt your heart skip a beat, everything else around you disappearing. Oh yeah, this was definitely the beginnings of a crush developing.

“{Name}!” You heard someone shout your name.

You turned to look at Chase, the one who called you. “Yeah, what’s up?” You replied casually.

“Are you okay? You weren’t paying attention,” He said.

“Sure I was, or rather if it was you talking, then I probably wasn’t,” You teased.

“Very funny,” He gave you a sarcastic smile which made you grin widely. “Anyway, this is Oliver and Kaz.”

“Right, okay, nice to meet you,” You said, looking back at the boys, eyes lingering on Kaz.

“Well, c’mon we have a lot to catch up on,” Chase grabbed your hand, ready to drag you off somewhere else.

“Yeah we do and you have to help me unpack,” You told him, leaving the penthouse.

“Woah, Chase has a girlfriend? Finally,” Kaz joked once you and Chase were out of the room. “Although she is way to pretty for him.”

“No, not his girlfriend but it’s only a matter of time,” Bree said, earning confused looks from her friends. “They’re so into each, they just don’t realize it yet but they will soon.”

They nodded in understanding, Kaz had a bitter taste in his mouth, because like he said, you were very pretty. And, not to be rude, you seemed way out of Chase’s league. He carried on with his day, hoping to see you around more in the penthouse.

It’s been a good month since you moved into Davenport Tower. You lived more with the Elite Force than in your own apartment, mostly because you were always hanging out with Chase. And being friends with the smartest man in the world had its perks when it came to your homework. He never failed to help you with it and you gave him something to do, since he was no longer mission leader and all. With you came the witty banter and casual flirting that you could only ever to do with Chase, which you had both missed greatly. You and Chase had established long ago that it was all playful and that the two of you were better off friends.

Contrary to everyone’s beliefs, you two didn’t harbor any romantic feelings for each other. The two of you just kind of connected, is all, it was easy to talk to him and vice versa. You were each other’s wing person, or rather you were Chase’s wing woman, you did fine on your own. If you killed someone, he was the person you’d call to help you bury the body. Er rather he’d freak out while you did all the work.

Spending your time at the penthouse also gave you the opportunity to befriend Kaz. He’s charming and funny, a little weird, but that only added to his charm. In the one month you’ve been here, you’d developed a crush on the superhero. You told Chase about it once and he completely freaked out, his best friend attracted to his teammate. It wasn’t exactly on his list of his most favorable things. He also thought it would be too weird for his teammate to date his best friend. So, you never talked to him about it again, and instead let your feelings develop internally. And boy did they develop, because you really liked Kaz.

“Chase, I don’t get it,” You whined.

“You’re over thinking it, statistics isn’t that hard,” Chase said.

“Easy for you to say, Mr. I’m-The-Smartest-Man-In-The-World,” You rolled your eyes and playfully pushed him.

He had a smug look on his face, he loved when people acknowledged him as the smartest man in the world. The two of you were currently sitting outside on the balcony, Chase helping you with your math homework. Or rather, he was doing all the work while you whined about not getting it.

“Okay, let’s go over it again,” He said.

You pouted and leaned close to him, giving him your best puppy dog eyes as you spoke. “Can’t you just do it for me?”

He leaned in close, your noses almost touching, a soft smile on his face. If anyone would’ve seen the two of you, they would’ve thought it was two people very much in love. But really it was just how the two of you interacted with one another. But anyway, maybe you got through to him? “No.” He answered bluntly, crushing your hopes and dreams.

“You suck, you know,” You told him.

“Hey guys, what’s going on here?” You heard someone say.

You turned around to see Kaz standing by the doorway, eyeing the two of you suspiciously. “Chase’s being a bum and won’t do my homework for me.” You answered, resting your head on Chase’s shoulder.

“I’ve been down that road, never works,” Kaz replied jokingly, ignoring the feeling that was building up.

“But it should because you love me, right Chase?” You said, looking at Chase.

At those words, the bitter feeling in Kaz’s stomach rose and it didn’t help that you two were acting so lovey dovey. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that he was jealous of Chase. That was a first too, Kaz jealous of Chase, he never thought he’d live to see the day. Wanting to break up your little moment, Kaz came in between the two of you, sitting himself in the middle. Neither of you thought anything of it, to he honest, this was something Kaz would do regardless of jealousy.

“Maybe I can help,” He said. He took one look at your homework and shook his head. “Yeah I can’t help you.”

You laughed lightly, finding his attempt to be smart really cute. “That’s okay Kaz, at least you tried, unlike someone.”

“I’m not doing your homework for you!” Chase bellowed out.

“Boo,” You looked over at Chase and stuck your tongue out at him.

He rolled his eyes and stood up. “Fine, this is the last time I help you.”

He started walking back into the Penthouse and you cried out for him to come back in a desperate tone. You could practically feel him rolling his eyes at you which only made you grin. Besides, he’d be back and would most definitely succumb to your wants. “C’mon you don’t need him. You’re smart, you can do this.” Kaz said, directing your attention back to him.

“You really think so?” You asked.

“Absolutely,” He replied.

You smiled widely at his encouraging words, your heart skipping a beat as you looked at him. He looked right back, his smile matching your own. Kaz couldn’t help but think how beautiful you looked right now; hair thrown in a messy bun, glasses hanging low on your nose. He almost wanted to lean in and kiss you right then and there but he refrained from doing so. He knew, or thought, you liked Chase and he didn’t want to interfere in that. No matter how much he wanted to or how much hated it.

“Am I interrupting something?” Chase asked.

“Yeah, you are. Now are you gonna help me or not?” You asked again, looking at Chase.

“I’ll help but I won’t do your homework,” Chase replied, handing you a water bottle.

Kaz got up and left, letting the two of you go back to doing your homework. His heart felt heavy at the thought of leaving the two of you alone. Cause who knew, this could be the day you confessed to each other and come out as a couple. The thought of it left a sour taste in his mouth.

You walked off the hyperlift and into the command base, where you found your best friend deep at work. His back was turned to you and you could tell he was deep concentration. An evil smile crawled onto your face as you creeped up behind him. You slowly and carefully leaned in as you peered over his shoulder.

“Is that a foot?” You asked.

You had never seen a man jump so high and shriek so loudly like Chase did. You doubled over in laughter, holding your stomach as you laughed loudly. This was too good; you could feel his glare on you and it only made it funnier. You straightened up and wiped away the tears that had managed to escape your eyes. His angry look only made you laugh harder, if looks could kill, you’d be dead.

“This is so funny,” You said, emphasizing the o in So.

“No, it's not!” He shouted.

“No, it really is. Anyway, what’s with the foot?” You asked again.

“If you must know, I’m building an android,” He explained.

“Why?” You questioned.

“Because...science,” He answered. You looked at him with a blank look, knowing damn well that there was more to that story. “I’m building an android girlfriend...because I’m lonely.”

“Oh, that poor android,” You commented.

“Ha, funny,” He replied sarcastically.

“Thank you, I try,” You said, earning a look from Chase. “But an android girlfriend? Don’t you think it’s a little too...much?”

“No, why would you say that?” He responded in a question.

“Do I really need to answer that?” You asked.

He was quiet for a while, seeing your point in that but choosing to ignore it. You shook your head and went along with it, knowing that he wasn’t going to let up. “Okay well, call me when it all goes downhill.” You turned around and started walking back to the hyperlift.

“Sure, but it won’t!” He called out, continuing to work on his droid.

You were back upstairs where you bumped into Bree. Oh, perfect, you could spend some quality time with her while you waited for Chase’s plan to backfire on him. “Whatcha doing?” You asked.

“I was just gonna head out, maybe do a little shopping. Wanna come with?” She told you.

“Absolutely!” You agreed.

“Great, let’s go,” She said.

The two of you headed out the door and out of the building. You were quick to hit stores, casually browsing and chatting. During this, Bree thought it was the perfect opportunity to ask you the question that’s been nagging her.

“So, what’s going on with you and Chase?” She asked.

“What do you mean?” You questioned, confused.

“I mean are you two finally together? Kaz told me about how you two were so cozy on the terrace, so I figured you two were a thing now,” She explained.

“What? No, Chase and I are just friends. Why would you say that?”

“Really? You two are so close and I’ve never seen either of you flirt with anyone else like you do with each other.”

“Woah, slow your role there. Chase is my best friend, almost like a brother, I’m just comfortable around him. That’s all, there nothing like that between us. Besides I actually like K-” You stopped yourself before you could spill you well kept secret.

“You like who?” She asked intrigued.

“No one, I like no one,” You told her.

“No, you were about to say someone. Who is it? Who do you like?”

“I’m telling you its no one now shush.”

You pressed your index finger against your lips to signal for her to stop talking. Every time she’d try to speak up, you’d simply shush her until she let up. So the two of you continued with your shopping, every once in a while she tried to coax the information out of you. Once the two of you were satisfied with the items you bought, you headed home. You headed to your apartment first, which was a floor below the penthouse, so you could put your things away. You told Bree you’d catch up to her and she took your word for it. Once you finished, you headed back upstairs, curious to see if Chase finished his android or not.

When you got to mission command, you didn’t find Chase, instead you found Kaz and some girl. Cue the jealousy instantly brewing inside of you. They were facing away from you, cheering on the monitor that was showing a baseball game. Who the heck was this chick?

“What’s going on?” You asked, bitterness in your tone.

Kaz turned to look at you, goofy grin on his face; the girl also looked at you, an artificial looking smile on her face. It was definitely because you were jealous but something about her seemed so fake.

“Hey {Name}! Meet Christina, my android girlfriend,” He said merrily.

Girlfriend? She was his girlfriend? Wait, did he say android girlfriend, as in Chase’s android girlfriend? You didn’t get to say anything because Chase soon joined you two, dressed in sharp looking suit. He looked at Kaz and Christina, taken aback at how cozy they looked with one another.

“What’s going on?” He asked, repeating your question.

“Kaz stole your girlfriend,” You said bluntly.

“I did not steal her,” He defended. “I saved her from Chase. He was gonna take her to the symphony, I couldn’t put her through that.”

“Maybe she wanted to go to the symphony,” You bitterly stated.

“She did, until I changed her programming,” He said.

“You reprogrammed her to like you instead of me?” Chase asked.

“Hmm let’s see, did you suddenly become a normal person who likes chicken wings and sports?” Kaz replied with a rhetorical question.

“No,” Chase so dumbly answered.

“Then yes, yes I did,” He replied, turning to Christina and giving her a fist bump.

He turned back to you and Chase. “Listen, I’m sorry. I thought it was amazing that you could design a perfect girl, so in a way, me stealing her is a compliment.”

That “perfect girl” comment was a real jab to your heart, so you weren’t Kaz’s idea of a perfect girl; duly noted. “I don’t have time for this, Christina and I have to get to the symphony. Helmut von Jurgen is conducting tonight. Helmut von Jurgen.”

“Ugh, I don’t wanna do that,” Christina groaned.

“Chase, just reprogram her,” You said, rolling your eyes, wanting to get this over with.

“That’s exactly what I’m gonna do,” He replied, getting his computer.

“No, you can’t!” Kaz exclaimed, fighting Chase to get ahold of the computer. He came out victorious and had the computer in his hands, quickly backing away from Chase. “Run Chrissy.”

One of the underground passage ways opened up and both Kaz and the android starting running away. Christina stopped shortly, yelling out wait and turning to look back at Chase.

“Did you change your mind?” Chase asked in a hopeful tone.

“Nope! Mama needs her wings,” She said, running to pick up the bucket before running through the tunnel.

“I love her,” Kaz stated before running away.

That hurt even more than the “perfect girl” comment did, and you wanted nothing more than to get away from this mess. Chase looked at you with a frustrated look on his face, and you just shrugged your shoulders. You really didn’t want to be here right now but you couldn’t show it. Honestly, you were kind of fuming on the inside, completely jealous of a robot.

“Chase, just make another one,” You said.

“I don’t want another one, I want Christina,” He told you.

“Why? Because she’s so perfect,” You scoffed.

“Yes, that’s exactly why,” He expressed. “Also, Kaz has my laptop and it has all my notes.”

“Whatever, good luck with this,” You snapped, quickly leaving the area.

Chase watched you leave, a look of confusion on his face from your mannerisms. You weren’t acting like yourself, otherwise you and him would’ve gone chasing after Kaz right now. But never mind that, he had to catch up to Kaz and Christina right now and win back his woman.

You were back upstairs in the living room, sitting on the couch with your arms crossed and a scowl on your face. You couldn’t believe what was going on right now, Kaz was attracted to a robot. Why? What did it have that you didn’t? Artificial intelligence apparently. You sighed and threw your head back, staring up at the ceiling, you were in a very bitter mood right now. Were you really going to wallow in self-pity right here on this couch? Yeah absolutely...no, you shook your head and decided to go home, you could wallow in self-pity there.

When you got to your apartment, you went straight to your room and fell onto your bed. You didn’t fall asleep, you just kind of lied there in your own misery. Maybe you should’ve said something about your feelings sooner? But you’d always been afraid of ruining the friendship you created with him. If he rejected you then it would’ve made things awkward between the two of you. You were just going have to swallow your feelings and see this thing through.

So, after several minutes of laying on your bed, you convinced yourself to get up. You decided to go back upstairs to the Penthouse and help Chase. When you got there, the scene before you was not something you expected at all. Kaz sat on the couch, smiling smugly, a gaggle of girls surrounding him. You could taste bitterness in your mouth as you looked at the scene before you.

“What the actual fuck is this?” You asked bitterly.

They all looked at you, Chase had a defeated look on his face. “Kaz stole all my android girlfriends.”

“Awe Chase-y, come here,” You said, holding your arms out.

He walked over to you with a pouty face, you wrapped your arms around him and patted his back gently. You glared over at Kaz on behalf of Chase and yourself. But he ignored that, because seeing you and Chase hugging only brought back that jealous feeling.

He didn’t say anything and just continued to watch the two of you with weary eyes. You pulled away from Chase and placed your hand on his shoulders. You gave him a sincere look as you spoke. “Chase, you don’t need a bunch of android girlfriends. You’re a great guy who can get any girl he wants, even if others don’t think so.”

Kaz sat up in his seat, watching your intimate interaction and fear bubbling up in his stomach. Why fear? Because he was afraid that he might see the two of you confess your feelings for each other. I mean, this is how it happened in movies so it wouldn’t be shocking if it happened with you two.

“You really think so?” He asked.

“I know so. So how about we go get some frozen yogurt and I'll be your wing woman and set you up with a cute girl. We can even have sugar free,” You suggested.

Kaz felt a bit of relief surge through him when he saw that you were just trying to cheer up Chase. He didn’t know what he’d do if you did confess.

“I’d like that, thanks {Name},” Chase replied.

“Well, you kids have fun,” Kaz spoke, trying to sound like his usual happy self. “Hey Christina, can you hand me my laptop.”

You watched as the group of androids all launched into action, each one wanting to be the one who gave Kaz his laptop. Kaz had a panicked look on his face as he gripped his laptop and ripped it out of their artificial hands. He was slightly disheveled from that as he stood up and walked over to you two.

“I love that they’re so into me, but do they have to be so aggressive?” He asked.

“Yes, I programmed them to be overly territorial and loyal,” Chase replied.

“Why?” You questioned.

“So, they’d never leave me! Were you not listening? I’m lonely,” Chase told you.

You snickered at his comment while Kaz proceeded to check his laptop. “Ooh, I got an email from Caldera. Maybe it's from that Calderan Prince giving his money away.”

“Kaz, there’s no freaking Calderan Prince,” You said, giving him a look of disbelief.

“Okay, someone’s a little testy,” He playfully said.

“Oh you have no idea,” You grumbled under your breath.

“That’s weird, this email is from Oliver and Bree,” He continued.

“Who’s Bree?” You heard the chorus of androids say.

Kaz rolled his eyes at them and answered. “A librarian friend, very frumpy. It says that Oliver and Bree are trapped in a calderan prison cell, with Scarlett.”

“Who’s Scarlett?” They asked again.

“Why are you asking so many questions?” Kaz replied in an irritated tone.

Chase took the laptop away from Kaz and looked the email over, they needed to go to Caldera and rescue them. Kaz explained to the two of you how to do that, you’d have to use a wormhole transmitter. Chase ordered him to go get it, which he did, it was downstairs in mission command. He walked to the hyperlift, his gaggle of girl-droids following closely behind. It made you scoff and role your eyes at them, stupid android girls.

For your own safety, Kaz pointed out that you had to stay behind. He didn’t want to risk you getting hurt on Caldera, he wouldn’t forgive himself if you did. You wanted to say something, almost laughing at how he was now caring about you but you refrained. Plus, Chase agreed, since you were the only one who didn’t have superpowers or bionics, you needed to sit this one out. So you agreed, only because Chase said so and you weren’t made at him for anything.

So you stepped back and watched them go through the wormhole. You lounged around in the living room, watching some tv while you waited for your friends to safely get home. It wasn’t until very late did another wormhole appear in the loving room and your friends were home. The androids were here too, how fun, you had hoped they would’ve been left stranded on Caldera.

“Welcome back guys!” You greeted.

Kaz got rid of the androids that night, finding seven girlfriends to be stressful. Instead he decided to secretly keep pining after you, you were a lot better than an android. And he decided to tell you how he felt before you and Chase became an official thing. Cause who knows, maybe he has the chance to win you over. But that proved harder than expected because you were kind of avoiding him. Every time he tried to talk to you, you’d divert your attention elsewhere. It was getting really annoying!

And yes, you were slightly avoiding Kaz because you were still in a sour mood about the whole android thing. Even after Kaz decided to get rid of them. Currently, you were sitting outside in the balcony, attempting to do your homework. That proved a lot harder because you couldn’t concentrate, still thinking about how Kaz thought androids made better girlfriends. You couldn’t believe that you were actually jealous of a robot but you were.

Someone sat down next to you and you didn’t have to look up to tell it was Kaz. “What do you want Kaz, I’m a little busy.” You said.

“I thought I could help you with your homework,” He replied.

“No thanks, I don’t need a monkey telling me how to do my psych homework,” You scoffed, slightly regretting your choice of words.

“You think that’s an insult but it’s really not.”

“Whatever, just leave me alone. I have a ton of homework to do and I don’t need you distracting me.”

“Okay, what is up with you? You’re never like this!”

“Nothing’s up with me!” You argued.

If he wasn’t leaving then you would, you made the motion to stand up but he stopped you. He held onto your arm, keeping you in place.

“We’re not moving until you tell me what’s wrong,” He insisted.

“Why do you care? You sure as hell didn’t care a couple of days ago when you had those androids all over you,” You scoffed, everything was starting to pour out now.

“What do they have to do with any of this? And of course I care, I’ll always care about you,” He defended.

“Yeah sure didn’t look like it then. You let them put their robotic hands all over you and you just sat their with you stupid grin. You’re so oblivious to things sometimes. Why couldn’t you see how jealous I was, why can’t you see how much I l-” You stopped yourself before you could say anymore.

“How much you what? And you were jealous…of the androids,” And then he put two and two together. “You like me?”

“What? No! That’s ridiculous! This whole conversation is ridiculous. I have homework to do so if you don’t mind,” You tried brushing the matter aside but it didn’t work.

Kaz had this huge grin on his face. “That’s awesome!”

“It…is?” You questioned.

“Yeah because I like you too,” He confessed.

You felt your heart flutter at his words, finding them unbelievable. “So then why the androids?”

“Look, at first I just wanted to mess with Chase, that’s all it was. Then it was nice to have someone who was solely interested in me, even if they were a robot. I just thought I had a better chance with them than I did with you,” He explained.

“You’re such a dork. But at least now you know you have a better chance with me than them,” You said.

“So, do you wanna go watch a movie?” He asked.

“Right now? Absolutely!” You cheered.

You packed your things away and stood up, Kaz held an arm out for you. You linked your arm around his before the two of you started walking out. Delight and excitement coursed through both of you as you had finally told each other how you felt and cleared up any confusion. Oh, and how Chase was gonna love this! But it didn’t matter, he’d get over it and you were happy so that’s all that really mattered.

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#oneshots #oneshot #one shots #one shot #lab rats elite force #lab rats #mighty med #kaz #kaz one shots #kaz one shot #lab rats elite force one shots #lab rats elite force one shot #mighty med one shots #mighty med one shot #lab rats one shots #lab rats one shot

244 notes · View notes

crazynekochan · 5 years

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Omegaverse Fantasy/Steampunk-ish AU: Kazuichi, Hajime, Mikan, Chiaki, Nekomaru, Imposter, Sonia, Fuyuhiko, Mahiru, and Teruteru are all working/travelling on a newly built flying passenger ship as part of the ship’s maiden voyage over a mostly uncharted continent to get to a major city on the other side because Sonia, Imposter, and Fuyuhiko are working as diplomats and Mahiru is a reporter recording everything for her readers (despite being the designer of the ship, Kazuichi is just /suffering/ here and spending most of the journey below deck, whimpering in misery whenever the ship hits turbulence).

While the ship is going through a patch of storm, it suddenly gets hit with a massive surge of lightning and crashes into the forest below, miraculously leaving all the crew unharmed (albeit scattered into groups of 1 or 2 around the landing site and all unconscious) and the ship fully functional with the exception of all the fuel (magical crystals that conducted electricity through them to operate the ship) being either spent or rendered non-functional.

They all wake up in a big old temple, all tied to each other in a circle, with Hajime, Kazuichi, and Fuyuhiko in the front, facing the back of the hall. At the front of the room, a group of young people in old-fashioned clothes are arguing with an elder in slightly more modern clothes in a language that no one understands, not even Sonia, but they can all tell that the argument is referring to them and the elder does not look very happy.

The group of young people are Nagito, Gundham, Ibuki, Hiyoko, Peko, Kyoko, and Akane, who were heading into the temple near the forest to do a “find your true love” ceremony when they heard a huge crash just a few minutes away from them. They all ran to check and found the ship crashed into a clearing with everyone on board unconscious and either still in the ship or scattered around. The group brought them to the temple to ask the elder, Jin, what they should do about them, since the last time newcomers came was when a young Jin and his baby daughter Kyoko ended up lost in the jungle on an expedition.

Everyone but Akane and Hiyoko has already fallen in love with one of the castaways (Ibuki fell in love with both Chiaki and Mikan) and they think that this is a sign that they should keep them as gifts from the gods. Jin is much more cautious since these people just crash landed and they could be confused and violent and he’s really grown to get attached to these kids (they’re all functional exiles from the main tribes either because of magical abilities (Gundham and Ibuki), odd appearances that suggest malicious witchcraft (Hiyoko and Peko), issues with their family debts (Akane and her many sibilings), perceived cursed nature (Nagito) or not being from any of the tribes in the area (the Kirigiris)) and doesn’t want them hurt.

Kyoko notices that the group is all awake and let’s the arguers know, which stops the argument for the time being. Jin tells the crash group everything that they need to know (the crash and discovery, why they’re all tied up, where they are (a forest near the coast of the uncharted continent), etc.). When Kazuichi asks about how their ship is, since they need to fix it to continue their journey or at least to get to civilization, Jin decides to have them all taken to the crash site, with the natives keeping an eye on them (everyone with a crush is mostly using it as an excuse to stay near their crushes) so Kazuichi could inspect it himself.

Kazuichi declares the ship pretty much functional but almost completely useless except for shelter and the remaining food and medicine because all of the fuel is just gone, which makes everyone who crashed upset.

Jin offers to let them all stay at their mini-village for the time being, since they can’t get back to their regular lives right away. After some deliberation, they all accept but not before removing all their stuff from the ship because Kazuichi’s not super sure that it won’t explode or start leaking noxious fumes from the destroyed fuel crystals.

The castaways end up spending about 13 months in the village, learning about everyone in the exiled youth village and their larger civilization (It started from a travelling group that split off from the standard civilization about 800 years before. Their culture has so much nuance and brilliant architecture and art, it’s amazing) and teaching the village about their civilization and technology in return, once Jin manages to teach them enough of the native language to not have to communicate solely through hand gestures and facial expressions.

Along the way, people end up falling in love and become mates, the first being Kazuichi and Gundham, once Kazuichi managed to find out that Gundham was trying to awkwardly court him (which he didn’t realize due to obliviousness and cutural differences), who had a lovely mating ceremony where everyone attended, Nekomaru and Fuyuhiko cried (Fuyu cried a little, Nekomaru cried a lot) during it, and Akane and her siblings had to be bribed in the reception feast by Teruteru to not interrupt the ceremony with commentary.

Meanwhile, everyone who knew the castaways is absolutely freaking the hell out (a princess and some of the most brilliant minds of a generation were all on that ship) and searching for them like mad, with Izuru leading the head search party, which included some of the friends and family if the castaways to at least get some closure if nothing else. Their efforts were mostly fruitless until they finally find the crashed ship with Kazuichi and Gundham inside because Kaz still wants to keep the best invention of his life in tip top shape. After some very enthusiastic reunions when Kazuichi and Gundham take the search party back to the village and most of the castaways meet their friends and families for the first time in months, Izuru investigates just how the ship crashed, since Kazuichi couldn’t find anything even after 13 months and those fuel crystals were supposed to outlast the ship itself. Izuru uses some of his magic to trace back whether the malfunction was magical in nature (Kazuichi can’t use magic, so he wouldn’t know if it had something to do with magic and Gundham doesn’t trust technology) and immediately gets hit with a force of malice and most importantly Despair and recognizes it as Junko Enoshima. Junko, a manipulative sorceress, wanted to drive the world into despair by killing off some of the greatest minds of the generation and maybe start a few wars while she’s at it by blaming rival countries for shooting down the crown princess and a few other diplomats from two wealthy kingdoms. But the spell didn’t wreck the ship or kill anyone, just wrecked their fuel and left them stranded.

After making a solemn vow to get rid of Junko when they get back to civilization for trying to kill his brother, Izuru gets a bunch of spare fuel crystals from the search party’s supply and helps Kazuichi reinstall them into the engine, bringing the ship back to fully operational, which is great because the search party has been in this jungle for around a year at this point and they are really getting homesick.

Everyone, including the villagers, who all decide to come along, all pack up their things and arrive to the ship’s original destination much to the surprise of everyone who thought they were dead and they pretty much became famous for discovering an entire civilization, with Mahiru’s pictures and Jin’s story giving an excellent look into the culture and lifestyles of the people living there. And yes, the villagers all experience life in the ‘modern’ day, with some definite and absolutely hilarious culture shocks that are mediated through having a bunch of friends who can navigate through it, even after being missing for over a year. And yes, Izuru did get rid of Junko.

(A/N: I should really be studying but forget it, I needed to write this before I forget about it. Please leave some feedback!)

(Mod: I hope your studying is going well ♥

Omegaverse, steampunk and fantasy in one, I have to be in heaven because these are my three top favourite AUs/tropes of all time ♥

I feel so sorry for Kazuichi. He build that airship and has to probably sometimes check if everything is working as intended but the poor guy would feel so sick on a constant basis and simply be in hell instead of enjoying the marvel of his groundbreaking invention

The terror everyone felt when the ship suddenly got struck by lightning and causing them to fall out of the sky and to crash into the middle of nowhere must have been pure horror for them all. When they then also wake up alive, but realise they are tied up in a temple and surrounded by some people in strange clothing things couldn’t get any worse. They survived a crash landing to presumably be tortured to death in some temple by some ancient tribe. Since no one can speak their language it’s also impossible to reason with them. But most of them couldn’t deny that they at least looked good, but doesn’t make the possibility of death much better. Luckily Jin can actually speak Japanese and so everything is quickly solved

The “modern” group probably had a lot of fun in the middle of a gigantic forest because of all the wildlife and dangerous nature around them ^^” All of them grew up in towns and cities and at the max only saw a small forest which is nothing against this. They probably had to have one of the natives always accompany them before any of them got lost or ends up seriously harming themselves. Also I could imagine that Kaz would for his life never understand how Gundham could look at a deadly animal that happens to cross their path and decide that this is his newest pet. Btw nothing better than Kaz being an oblivious idiot in love

Also I love the backstory that you came up with for the tribe members, giving everyone a different yet believable reason as for why they are in their current mismatched tribe

I can just imagine how Izuru is in the meanwhile taking every part of the continent apart together with the royal family and the other big name families, while their missing relatives are happily courting and mating some native tribe members in the middle of nowhere. Izuru would also stomp everyone who even dares to suggest that his twin is probably dead into the ground without mercy because there is no way that Hajime died. I could also imagine that his stoic face completely broke when he actually found Hajime safe and sound after searching for him for over a year. Like just imagine how sweet it would be that Izuru actually is brought to tears from relieve to finally seeing his twin again and just hugging him

At least until he notices that Hajime’s scent changed and that he has a mating mark on the back of his neck, because then he would glare at Nagito who’s scent matches the one sticking to his twins whole body. Luckily Hajime would quickly calm his twin that everything is consensual and that he and Nagito are willingly mated because they love each other)

#submission #danganronpa #soudam #komahina #prompt #tag to be added #friendlylifecherry

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thisqueenshallconquer · 6 years

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Honeymoon Period

Summary:

Kaz Brekker may not be a good man, but, her father was right, he was worthy of her.

Rating: T

Pairing: Kanej

Link: Ao3

Inej awoke far earlier than she would have liked. She squinted, thick lashes shielding her eyes from the sunlight streaming in through the windows. The bright silks of the curtains transformed the muffled rays of light into vivid jewel-tones. Reds, purples and oranges, bled together across the floor of the caravan in a kaleidoscope of colour.

She was still wearing her dress from the night before. Her embodied silks weighing heavy against her skin as she stretched out her legs, her feet brushing against Kaz's calves as she willed feeling back into her limbs.

Last night had been a late one. Dawn had already begun to break as the celebration wound down, and they were finally sent off to bed by their guests. Inej had been dead on her feet as they made their procession back to camp, grateful for Kaz's arm in hers, and for her young cousins, who carried her train with great care through the long grasses.

Inej cast her eyes around the unfamiliar surroundings. The caravan wasn't entirely alien to her, she recognised her mother's hand in each of the embroidered cushions, noted her father's craftsmanship in each item of furniture. Even the smell was familiar, dried blossoms and incense - it was the scent of her childhood. But this caravan was far larger than the one she'd grown up in. Her parents' caravan had been passed down through her mother's side, the interior cramped but cosy, the exterior worn but well-loved. This was unlike anything Inej had ever seen, the space large and airy in a way that seemed impossible from the outside looking in. The bed had never been slept in, the stove never used, the wood polished and expertly carved. It was beautiful, better than anything Inej felt she deserved.

Guilt swirled inside her stomach. Her parents were far too generous. If she had known they would waste their savings on a gift for her - well, she couldn't truly be mad at them, not when it was in their nature to be so kind. It was customary, for the Suli to present their daughter with a gift on her wedding night, but earlier that morning, when her parents guided them back to their new home, Inej had nearly been bowled clean over by the gesture. She had gaped openly, her hand tracing the smooth wooden panels that made up the facade, her long crimson train carving a path through the wild grass behind her.

"Do you not like it?" her father had asked in Suli, his concern etched across his wrinkled face. He was older now than the last time she'd visited, his face more lined, his hair greying around the temples. Her parents would never begrudge Inej her freedom, of that she knew, but that didn't stop her from feeling sorry about her absence.

Inej shook her head, golden jewellery jangling loudly. "It's perfect, Papa" she had smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck. He was tall and willowy, the perfect build for an acrobat. "I just wish you had spent the money on yourselves."

He pulled back with a smile, tucking several loose strands behind her ear. "Your mother and I, we've had more time to save up than most." Inej had coloured slightly at that, at twenty-nine she was a very old bride indeed, most Suli girls were wed before they saw their eighteenth birthday. "We never stopped saving, not even when.....," he swallowed down the emotion in his throat, Inej did the same. "We always had faith that one day we would get to see you in your bridal silks."

Inej had smiled until her cheek ached, tears gathering in her eyes. They would not spend much time here, not between Ketterdam and The Wraith, but her parents had created a space for them, for her and Kaz both.

"He is a worthy man" her father had remarked, his gaze flicking to where Kaz was conversing with her mother in Kerch. "A little....unconventional, but worthy of you."

Not good, or moral, or pious. Worthy. Kaz Brekker was a murderer and a thief, he was a sinner and an unrepentant one at that. But Inej could not imagine marrying anyone else. He knew her favourite song and her favourite flower. But he also knew her well-enough to buy her a boat rather than a bouquet.

She was the first Ghafa to marry outside the close-knit circle of Suli families, but how could she ever find happiness with another man? No-one else, Suli or not, could understand her the way he did. Kaz knew how to soothe her after a nightmare, knew when to hold her, and when to give her space. He did not pass judgement on her, or want more than she was willing to give.

Kaz Brekker may not be a good man, but, her father was right, he was worthy of her.

She felt the rise and fall of his chest beneath her cheek, still fast asleep and fully-clothed. Instead of consummating their marriage like most couples, they had kicked off their shoes and collapsed on the bed, far too weary to even bother changing into their night clothes, never mind anything else. A sure sign they were getting old.

She watched his profile in the early morning light, the pale scars cutting across his even paler skin, the slight bump on the bridge of his nose where it had once been broken in a brawl. Inej bit her lip. Kaz Brekker had aged like a fine wine, only getting more handsome with age. The faint lines congregating around his mouth and the corners of his eyes did nothing to dampen his good-looks, a fact even her family had taken note of.

"You have done well for yourself, cousin" Amara had said the previous morning, as she wove delicate flowers between the strands of Inej's braid. She was more than a little impressed that Amara could style hair while bouncing a baby on her hip. "I wish I had had the good sense to go looking for a husband in Kerch," her cousin had sighed wistfully, ignoring the way Inej rolled her eyes in the mirror.

"Not all Kerch men are like him, you know," Inej had responded wryly.

"Pity," Amara let out another dramatic sigh, before pressing a kiss to her older cousin's temple. She cocked her hip, assessing her work in the mirror, reminding Inej of Nina in the mischievous way she grinned. "You'll knock him off his feet!" She declared with a flourish.

That wouldn't be such an impressive feat considering Kaz only had one good leg. But, Inej had to admit, as she walked down the aisle towards her soon-to-be-husband, that Kaz looked rather dashing in the white silks of a Suli groom.

And if he had learned a little harder on his cane upon seeing her, Inej was polite enough to not bring it up.

She was too lost in thought to notice the change in his breathing or the flutter of his eyelids. "Wife" he greeted, his voice a deep rasp, his arm tightening around her waist. Inej lifted her head, resting her chin against his ribs, her lips curving into a grin. "Husband," she returned, warmth flooding her chest.

He made to stretch out his bad leg, his limbs unfurling like a cat sprawled out beneath the sun. Inej chuckled as he groaned, his joints cracking, his eyes squeezing shut. She drummed her index finger against his solar plexus, once and then twice. A silent question.

Although they had slept side-by-side, their legs intertwined, they still had their bad days. Days where the cold water would rise around Kaz no matter how much he'd grown used to her touch. Days where the slightest brush of his fingertips could make her feel as if she were about to disappear. On those nights, they would sleep far apart in their bed at the Slat, a pillow propped between them as a barrier - Unable to touch, but unwilling to be apart entirely.

The scars they had would never fade completely, no matter how much time passed. This was their way of asking, the drumming of fingers against clothed skin - a silent inquiry about the other's well-being.

Coffee coloured eyes met hers, and Kaz took her hand in his bare one, bringing it up to his lips, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. It was a sweet gesture, one that might even be expected between newlyweds, but, for them, it was also an answer.

It seemed as though today was going to be one of their good ones.

Inej smiled contently, basking in the sleepy silence that enveloped them. She'd happily fall back to sleep wrapped in his arms, but her curious mind couldn't help but wonder. "You disappeared last night," she hummed, toying with the loose fitting neckline of his shirt.

The party had been a crowded affair. Inej hardly recognised most of the people crammed beneath the golden canopy of the tent. It seemed as though every Suli family in West Ravka had come to see the infamous Inej Ghafa finally tie the knot. If there was one thing the Suli loved, it was a good wedding.

"Crowds aren't exactly my thing," he murmured, his fingers rubbing small circles through the fabric at her waist. Inej snorted. Kaz wasn't exactly the best at socialising, even among the Dregs, he had always kept to himself. Inej just hoped he hadn't spent the evening brooding in some dark corner. Especially when she'd been forced to make small-talk with distant relatives she barely knew.

"Where did you go?"

"I was with your father," he explained, his expression distracted as his eyes roamed over the bare skin of her shoulder. Inej did not squirm under his approving gaze, if anything, she revelled in it. It had been a week since they'd arrived in Ravka, and this was the first time they had been left alone together. While she had found her family's desire to protect her virtue amusing at first, it had gotten old very quickly. They practically lived on top of one another in the Slat, and Kaz had stayed in the Captain's quarters with her during their long journey across the True Sea. But the less her relatives knew about that, the better. Espeacially since she'd been the one to take his 'virtue'.

"Oh?" Inej arched a thick brow. As tempting as it was to press closer to him, she couldn't help but wonder what had transpired between Kaz and her father. She knew he approved of the match, but...Inej always liked to err on the side of caution. "What did you talk about?"

"You," Kaz explained unhelpfully, leaning closer, his lips brushing against her collarbones. Inej's toes curled, her breath sticking inside her throat - he wasn't playing fair.

"Kaz," she scolded unconvincingly. She tried to ignore the need the burned under her skin, pulling up her shawl tight around her, cutting off his access to her bronzed skin.

"He made me promise to keep you safe," Kaz huffed in irritation. It seemed he had weathered their separation as poorly as she had. "Or at least I think he did, my Suli isn't the best." Inej had trouble believing that. Kaz picked up new skills with an infuriating amount of ease. She hadn't been all that surprised when he managed to say his vows in perfect, accent-less Suli.

"Was that all?" Inej asked sceptically, propping up her chin on her hand.

"Just that he'd murder me if I ever hurt you," he drawled with a wry smile and a shrug. Inej winced. While her father's efforts were appreciated, there was no way of Arjun Ghafa beating Kaz Brekker in any sort of fight.

"And what did you say?"

Kaz didn't respond at first, his fingers reaching up to undo the ribbon at the end of her hair, releasing her long-since redundant braid. His fingers smoothed through her strands, his lips quirking. He always liked it best when she wore it loose. "I told him that if I were ever stupid enough to cross you, that you were more than capable of killing me yourself."

"How romantic," Inej bit back a grin.

"Should I not have?"

"No," Inej shook her head, silencing him with a kiss as she leaned over him, her hair falling like a curtain around them, her shawl sliding down her arms and away from her shoulders. "I like that you know how deadly I am," she grinned, showing her teeth.

Kaz had never underestimated her, not even when she'd just been a frightened girl, quaking in the middle of Tante Heleen's parlour. You’re obviously dangerous. He had been right, she had proven him right.

"Only a fool would think otherwise."

"These days I might be even more feared than you," she smirked, her fingers brushing over the perfect line of his cheekbone.

His lips twitched. “Let's not get carried away, Wraith"

"That's Mrs Rietveld to you" she corrected with a smile, before capturing his mouth in a heated kiss. His hands were at her waist, in her hair, pulling her close until no space remained between them. The kiss was anything but chaste, it had been much too long since they'd been able to touch like this. They no longer had to worry about upholding outdated Suli traditions, or the prying eyes of well-meaning relatives.

But, as Kaz made to roll her over onto her back, Inej had to temporally put a stop to proceedings, pushing him against the mattress by his shoulders. "Not on your bad leg" she reprimanded, straddling his hips instead, enjoying the scowl she received in return. He'd pushed himself too hard yesterday setting up the wedding, she didn't want him to do himself any more damage. "You need to be more careful, you're not as young -"

"Don't say it," he groused stubbornly, his hands fisting in the fabric at her waist, hiking her skirts up her thighs. Age was a sore topic for The Bastard of the Barrel, ever since he'd been forced to invest in a pair of wire-rimmed reading glasses. Jesper could mock him for it all he liked, Inej thought they made him look distinguished.

A sly smile and few rolls of her hips soon banished any ill thoughts from his head, and Inej took another moment to admire her new husband. He looked up at her, his pupils blown wide against the dark backdrop of his irises. It had been fifteen years since their first meeting, thirteen since they first held hands, eleven since their first kiss. Their marriage had been a long time in the making, and yet, Inej's heart still ached with the way he looked at her – it was like he never wanted to turn away.

Her mouth trailed along his jaw, her hands pushing under his shirt to rest against the firm muscles of his chest. His skin was warm, his pulse fast beneath her touch, his bare hands running up the length of his thighs. If this was married life, Inej could get used to it. She might even be tempted to make it official in Kerch, too.

Their marriage would mean nothing under the eyes of Ghazen of the Merchant Council. It was a fact that never bothered Inej, she was a pirate, legality meant nothing to her anymore. But, as Kaz pressed his lips against her temple, her cheek, her jaw, Inej had no qualms about marrying him a second, or even a third time if he asked nicely.

They may not even have a choice, if Jesper and Nina were to find out the true cause for their trip to Ravka, she and Kaz would be having a shot-gun wedding in Ketterdam before the month was out. They had wanted a quiet ceremony among Inej's family, where no information could get back to their enemies in the Barrel. But now, Inej couldn't say she's adverse to the idea of having a wedding back home, surrounded by their friends. It would surely be worth it, just to see little Marya dressed up as a bridesmaid.

Kaz's movements haltered as his hands found the knives strapped to the insides of her thighs. Inej had clicked her tongue impatiently, moving to undo the straps and let her beloved weapons join the growing pile of clothing on the floor. But Kaz stopped her with a grin.

"Leave them on," he rasped against her throat, and Inej felt her whole body quake.

Oh Saints, she had never loved him more.

#Six of Crows #SoC #crooked kingdom #CK #grishaverse #kaz brekker #Inej Ghafa #kaz x inej #inej x kaz #Kanej #my fics #nina zenik #matthias helvar #nina x matthias #jesper fahey #Wylan Van Eck #wesper

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nomattertheoceans · 5 years

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My thoughts on King of Scars

Ok so first of all, obviously, spoiler alert, do NOT read further if you haven’t read the book (I wanted to put a cut but I don’t have the option on mobile, sorry...)

So yeah I think I need some mindless screaming into the void before I can be constructive, so... OMGVRDCNIUBCHIRUFHEJKDFKLUHOSJDXW THIS BOOK WAS SO SO SO GOOD I WISH I COULD FORGET I READ IT JUST SO I COULD READ IT AGAIN FOR THE FIRST TIME!!!!!! IT WAS SO AMAZING AND SO HEARTBREAKING AND SO FUNNY AND WITTY AND PERFECT UGH

Okay, I feel better now.

So... King of Scars. Where do I start?

Bardugo’s style improved so much since the Grisha Trilogy. It was obvious in the SoC duology, but it’s even more obvious now that she’s writing in the same setting, with some of the same characters. Her writing in this book is so good!

This book actually redeemed her in my eyes for the only thing I hated in SoC: Matthias’ death, that I found pointless and not very well handled. But man, did this book improve on it. Nina hearing his voice, her thinking of him when she talks about being a widow for her cover. The whole burying scene had me crying the entire time, it was so well written and so full of emotions, you could actually feel Nina get some form of closure from it, and it helped me accept his death too. So well done.

The prologue was great! I loved these in SoC and I’m glad she kept going with the idea, because introducing Nikolai and Zoya that way was a really good way to get the feeling of the current situation (and the POV of a random stranger works as well as it did in the duology).

NINA THINKING ABOUT THE CROWS ugh I’m dead, it was so amazing to read about how she wanted Inej to be with her to bury Matthias, how she used Kaz’s advice to craft her plan, how she thought about having inherited Jesper’s gift for bad decisions (I actually laughed out loud at that one XD). The whole idea that her year in Ketterdam really changed her and helped her grow into a better defender of the Grisha (even though she’s not as good at following orders ;) ), this was great. I miss the Crows so much.... OH AND NIKOLAI LEARNED TO PICK LOCKS WITH KAZ AND HE THINKS ABOUT HIM THAT WAS A GREAT REFERENCE TOO! Also, the fact that Leoni was the little girl saved by Jesper’s mom, that was such a great coincidence, I hope at some point they might meet and realize the connection, I don’t know how but it was a great detail to include, Leoni saving people thanks to Jesper’s mom’s sacrifice. (Yes, any reference to the Crows had me giggling to my book, I admit it)

So, I know a lot of people are going to be mad at me about this one because a lot of people hold the Darkling in high esteem, but the fact that he was framed as the main villain throughout the Nikolai/Zoya storyline felt really good to me. I honestly never understood how people could see him as a good person after everything that happened and that we learned in the Trilogy, and the fact that Bardugo focused mainly on him as the villain in Zoya’s story was a very good choice. Zoya feels angry and ashamed at how much she adored him and how he manipulated her and everyone around him. She cannot imagine people seeing him as a Saint because she witnessed his actions first hand and was also a victim of it, so she’s angry that even after all this, people can still ignore what he did. She’s mainly angry at herself about all this I think, but it was interesting to see this in her point of view. Continuing on the subject of The Darkling... OMG him being back at the end, I was so angry that he just wouldn’t STAY DEAD!! But I’m glad he’s back because I think his character in Bardugo’s improved style is going to be awesome (and I low-key want people to finally see him as the villain he is, but again, don’t be too angry at me, please!)

David and Genya are married now!! So are Nadia and Tamar!! And Tolya and his poetry XD and Adrik! It felt so good getting to reunite with all the Grisha characters, to see them evolve (again, thanks to Bardugo’s evolution in her writing) and become even greater than they were.

The secret laboratory was such a great addition, I can’t wait to see more of it!!! Also, Nikolai building a secret laboratory under a place of debauchery is SUCH a Nikolai thing to do XD

Nina in Fjerda is... so many emotions all along her storyline, it felt great. Knowing that she mostly managed to get over her addiction made me happy, she’s still an addict of course (kudos to Bardugo for including the fact that you never truly get over an addiction and that sobriety is a work of every day) but she managed to move past it and that’s great. Her new power is amazing but at the same time you can feel her nostalgia when she teaches Hanne, the fact that she stills misses her old powers. The experiments on the pregnant women were terrible, and so well-written, every scene with them killed me a little bit.

Hanne’s character is so good! I really love all of her evolution throughout the book, the way she’s willing to rebel at first but in small ways, and that she ends up actually rebelling with Nina. Also, even though I want it to be slow because I don’t think Nina is over Matthias yet, but UGH the way Nina describes her as so beautiful, I can’t wait for them to grow closer and maybe have a love story! Hanne’s being Brum’s daughter surprised me but in a good way, I love the irony that this monster would have a Grisha daughter (I hope he’ll find out at some point), and I love the way this laid out the plot line for the next book! Nina at the Ice Court!!!!! This is such an exciting thing to look forward to!

The whole Isaak storyline was great and ugh I was so NOT expecting this ending for it, I guess I’m a hopeless romantic because I wanted him to end up with the princess haha (but then I guess that’s what Leigh wanted us to think so good job ^^) and I really didn’t see the assassination coming! I had some doubts about the princess and the guard being interchanged but I had no idea what would be the point of that, so I guess I was seeing only half of the picture.

The fact that Nikolai was officially described as having some form of ADHD, this was a great scene, all of his childhood difficulties, and his friendship with Dominik, too. I loved all of this. I already loved Nikolai before (I mean... who didn’t?) but I love him so much more now! His struggle as King and doing what’s best for his country, knowing that letting his heart talk for him would be a mistake, preparing replacements for him in case something happens... I love him so much!!

Zoya... Zoya Zoya Zoya. She’s a great character, and she’s so interesting and complex and I’m so glad Leigh expanded on her character because it’s not often that women get to be strong and ruthless and beautiful and cold and not the villain of the story. So yeah, I love Zoya, she is amazing and all of her struggle over her past with The Darkling made her even more interesting than she used to be.

Finally, I think I’m going to end with Nikolai/Zoya relationship. I wasn’t completely sold at first, but then Nikolai had to go and think that:

“He’d come to recognize the bizarre phenomenon of Zoya’s beauty, the way men loved to create stories around it. They said she was cruel because she’d been harmed in the past. They claimed she was cold because she just hadn’t met the right fellow to warm her. Anything to soften her edges and sweeten her disposition - and what was the fun in that? Zoya’s company was like strong drink. Bracing - and best to abstain if you couldn’t handle the kick.”

And I was completely on board, never to leave again. Seriously. This quote is so perfect. Nikolai gets her, he loves being with her and how challenging she is to him, and he likes her just like she is, he doesn’t want her to change. And that’s great. Anyway, I really love their relationship throughout the book, its a challenging one but you can feel how much they like to work together and spend time together. The whole exchange when Zoya shows him the scars and he’s the first man she’d told the truth to... That was perfect. But omg, I knew there was going to be some sort of engagement for Nikolai (he’s a king after all), and during the entire book, him and Zoya both repeat more than once that they know it could never work if they let themself feel something for the other, but man I was NOT ready for Nikolai to get engaged to the Shu princess in the end.... Anyway, yes, I love them apart, and I love them together, and I can’t wait to read what happens next.

So overall, another amazing book to strengthen my complete obsession with the Grishaverse!! I will probably post a lot more about it in the coming days/weeks, and probably reread it! If you want to talk about it, don’t hesitate!!!

#grishaverse #king of scars #king of scars spoilers #king of scars spoiler #kos spoilers #kos spoiler #leigh bardugo #nina zenik #nikolai lantsov #zoya nazyalensky #nikolai duology #my thoughts on stuff

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emjenenla · 6 years

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If You’re Gone, Maybe It’s Time to Come Home Part Three [a SoC Fanfiction]

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four

Sorry for the outrageous amount of time this update took. College eats up all your time. Also, it turns out Kaz in this mental state is ridiculously hard to write in another character’s POV.

Part Three

(Inej)

(1)

The Van Eck mansion is full to the brim of members of the Dregs. The irony is thick because a year ago, such people would never have been allowed on the same street.

Inej threads her way through the drinking gang members. They’re laughing and sharing stories. They’ve all been told that the party is to celebrate the Dregs’ rise to prominence as the most powerful gang in Ketterdam; only the Crows and a few extremely trusted others know that the party is actually in honor of Inej’s successes hunting slavers.

Even though the building is full of people, it still feels empty to Inej. The only Crows there aside from her are Jesper and Wylan. Kaz hasn’t yet appeared, and Matthias’s death still weighs heavily on her, not to mention the fact that it has caused Nina to drop off the face of the world. Inej has no idea where her friend is and no one has heard from her in months.

Inej has tried everything to find Nina, even picking Kaz’s brain in their coded letters (if anyone knows where Nina is, it’s him). However, it’s been months since Kaz mentioned anything even semi-personal in his letters. They were always impersonal, but since her last visit to Ketterdam, he hasn’t bothered to do anything but send her lists of information. She’s starting to think he’s still sulking about the talking-to she gave him the last time they saw each other. That bothers her, because while Kaz is totally capable of holding a grudge for a couple months (after all, he managed to hold one on Pekka Rollins for years), he’s never stayed mad at her for this long before.

(2)

It’s at least ten bells when she finally admits that she’s worried. This isn’t like Kaz. She’d thought that he’d at least show his face, even if that was only because Jesper and Wylan or Anika and Keeg dragged him along.

She eventually seeks out Anika who is sitting at a table playing a good-natured card game with Pim, Keeg, Dirix and Roeder while Rotty and a couple other high-ranking Dregs look on. They all look up when Inej steps up.

“’Lo, Wraith,” Dirix says. “Welcome back. You staying for good this time?”

“Please don’t,” Roeder says with a good-natured smile to show he’s joking. “I like my job, and I don’t want you to steal it back.”

“No, I’m not staying,” Inej says. “Just stopping by for a visit. If you enjoy scrambling over every dirty, smelly crevasse of this city doing Kaz’s bidding, you’re more than welcome to it.” The instant the words come out of her mouth she feels guilty; she had never minded being Kaz’s spider, even when he was in a mood.

Still the Dregs laugh. They are all high enough in the ranks to have personally dealt with Kaz enough to know just how frustrating putting up with his opaque orders and unfathomable schemes could be.

When the laughter dies Inej moves on to the real reason she came over by them. “Where is Kaz by the way? I know he doesn’t like parties, but I haven’t seen him at all since I got back.”

The table goes silent. The Dregs look back and forth at each other like they’re trying to decide who should be the bearer of bad news. Inej’s stomach clenches with a familiar sense of apprehension, one that she’s been getting when she reads Kaz’s letters for months. It’s a subtle hint that something isn’t right, but she can’t for the life of her figure out what it is.

After a moment, Anika pushes back her chair and gives her cards to Rotty. “If you make me lose, I’ll end you,” she threatens, then stands up. “Come on, Ghafa,” she says in what Inej can only assume is her lieutenant’s voice. “Let’s have a chat.”

(3)

They step out into the hallway and Anika paces to the end to look out at the garden, arms crossed.

“Anika,” Inej ventures stepping up alongside her. “What’s wrong? Did something happen to Kaz?”

“I don’t know,” Anika says, slowly and precisely, like saying each word hurts.

“What do you mean?” Inej asks.

“He’s missing,” Anika says. “No one’s seen him in days.”

“What?” Inej can’t help it, she yells. “Why aren’t you looking for him?”

“We are!” Anika’s voice raises too. “But Ketterdam’s a big place and we don’t know where half his boltholes are. To be honest, he could still be holed up in his rooms in the Slat since no one actually saw him leave. No one answers when we knock, but the door’s locked, like, really locked.” She gives Inej a significant look.

Inej nods. Kaz has more locks on his door than any person should ever need, but he rarely uses all of them because several can only be locked and unlocked from the inside. He wouldn’t have gone through that much trouble if he was just going out. “Have you tried the windows?” she asks.

“Yeah,” Anika says. “We sent Mina up the morning after we lost track of him. The windows are all locked. To make matters worse, each one’s fitted with multiple Schuyler locks. Aside from Kaz there’s only a handful of people in the gang who can pick those, and none of them are capable of getting up on that roof without killing themselves.”

Inej bites her lip. She doesn’t know what to say. This doesn’t sound like Kaz at all. She tries to decide how likely it is that he just found an intriguing job and doesn’t like the odds. “Do you think he’s on a job?”

Anika growls low in the back of her throat, and Inej looks at her. “What?”

“You haven’t been around these past couple months, Ghafa,” Anika says. “Something’s not right with him. Hasn’t been in months, but it’s gotten worse since the last time you were here. I don’t know what kind of lover’s squabble the two of you had, but while you’ve been out there gallivanting around the ocean, we’ve been here dealing with him.”

Inej opens her mouth to protest that she’s doing a lot more than gallivanting, but stops herself because she’s not sure if Anika’s on the list of people who have been trusted with the true nature of her mission.

“Pim and I are basically running the Dregs,” Anika admits, calming down. “Brekker barely does anything anymore. I don’t think he’s realized we’ve noticed, though I’m not sure how that’s possible. He’s not very aware of anything. He spends a lot of time just staring blankly off into space. He’s not scheming, but I can’t figure out what he’s actually thinking about.”

Inej doesn’t know what to say. The idea of Kaz not pulling his own weight and leading the gang he bled for for so long is ludicrous. She can’t wrap her mind around it.

“So far, only the inner circle knows exactly how bad it is,” Anika says. She sounds exhausted. “That means me, Pim, Keeg, Dirix, Rotty, Roeder and Mina. We’re trying to keep it from going farther than that, but we’re running out of time. There are low-ranking members of the Dregs who are personally loyal to Kaz, but the majority of them are only loyal to the idea of him—of Dirtyhands, Bastard of the Barrel. When they figure out what’s going on…”

She doesn’t finish, but she doesn’t need to. Inej knows the Barrel well enough to know what Anika was going to say. If word gets out that Kaz is weak the very gang that has followed him so ravenously will turn on him just like they turned on Per Haskell. If that happens, Kaz will be lucky to escape with his life.

The thought is terrifying.

“What happened before he went missing?” Inej asks Anika, trying to push the conversation away from the horrible idea of Kaz’s possibly imminent fall.

Anika sighs. “You’d do best to ask Espen that.”

“What do you mean?”

“Hard to say,” Anika says. “All I know is that the night we lost track of the boss, he was supposed to go out to do some scouting with the spiders. He didn’t show up for hours. Roeder and Mina were just going to go without him, but Espen got angry and stalked upstairs. After a couple minutes he came down and said that-” she cuts herself off. “You know, you probably should talk to Espen about that, I’m not even sure I understand what went on.”

(5)

It takes Inej the better part of an hour to located Espen in the swirling mass of humanity in the Van Eck house. She’s just starting to wonder if he left without telling anyone when she runs into Mina. The young spider is more than happy to point her in Espen’s direction.

“I saw him over by the food,” she says. “Sulking probably; he hates parties.”

Inej threads through the crowd to the location specified. Espen is seated on a couch, crushed between the arm and a couple older members of the Dregs. He is clutching a plate of hors d'oeuvres and looks murderous, but he’s still there. If Kaz had been in his position, he’d have broken someone’s jaw and fled upstairs where there are less people by now.

Espen doesn’t notice her approach him, and Inej makes a mental note to tell Kaz to teach his spiders to be more observant. She waltzes up to Espen and snaps her fingers in front of his face.

He glares at her, overgrown mop of straw-colored hair falling into his angry blue eyes. Sometimes Inej looks at him and thinks that this must have been what Kaz had been like at age eleven, but other times she thinks that Kaz and Espen are only superficially alike. There is something almost theatrical about Espen’s anger, like he’s playing a part or seeking attention. She can’t imagine careful, calculating, brilliant Kaz ever acting like that.

“Wha’ do you want?” Espen asks in a low, gruff voice that might be a poor attempt at mimicking Kaz’s rasp.

“Just a chat,” Inej says and beckons with a finger. “Let’s go someplace quieter.”

(5)

She leads him into an upstairs parlor and locks the door behind them. He stands in the middle of the room, his arms crossed. “I’m waiting,” he says.

Inej rolls her eyes. “Drop the act. You’re not a hotshot. You’re just a kid.”

“I’m one of Kaz Brekker’s trusted spiders,” Espen says puffing his chest out. “I am one of the most important members of the Dregs.”

“Yes, and I’m the Wraith,” Inej says. “Do we really want to start throwing titles and accomplishments around?”

Espen visibly deflates. He either didn’t recognize her (which doesn’t make sense because she’s given him and the other spiders some tips during her visits in Ketterdam) or he was hoping she wouldn’t call him out on his bravado (much more likely). “What do you want?” he asks.

“Anika said that you and Kaz got in a fight a couple days ago,” Inej says.

“Yeah,” Espen says. “Happens all the time. Why does it matter?” There’s now something cagey about his body language. He’d rather not be talking about this.

“Why don’t you tell me about it,” Inej suggests, using the gentle, soothing voice she’s cultivated to put rescued slaves at ease.

She expects Espen to argue, but he grasps onto her offer to listen almost frantically. Whatever happened between him and Kaz has been weighing on his mind and he desperately wants to talk about it.

“I’m not a spider anymore,” he says.

That was not how she expected him to begin this conversation. “What do you mean?” she asks.

“I got fired,” Espen says, his voice is angry, but matter-of-fact in the way that only Barrel rats seem to be able to manage. As if bad things are something to be expected and taken when they come. “After the argument. Boss says he doesn’t want to see me ever again.”

That is odd. Inej has never known Kaz to tell someone he never wants to see them again. Loathe as she is to admit it, normally when he gets to that point he simply kills the person in question to ensure he doesn’t have to deal with them anymore. “What happened?” she asks slowly.

Espen shrugs, evasive anger back again. “I dunno. Brekker’s been really stupid lately.”

That sets off even more alarms in Inej’s head. She has never, ever heard the word “stupid” used in the same sentence as “Kaz Brekker.” “What do you mean?” she asks cautiously.

For a second Espen looks confused then nervous. “If Anika didn’t say anything, then maybe I shouldn’t-”

“Tell me,” Inej presses, shoving away the hurt at the idea that Anika might be keeping things from her. She and Anika aren’t exactly friends, but they’re not enemies either. Plus, Anika holds a position in the Dregs similar to the one that Kaz did when Haskell was general (albeit, with much less actual power). Of all the members of the Dregs, she’s the closest to Kaz and might be the only one who has a firm grasp on how serious Inej’s relationship with Kaz is. “Kaz is my friend,” she continues ignoring the voice that screams that she and Kaz are way past the “just friends” point. “If there’s something going on with him; I need to know about it.”

Espen sighs then relents and begins his story. Inej listens with growing shock as he relates his confrontation with Kaz. She recognizes the Kaz’s behavior because she has seen them in people she rescues from slavers. She has seen people who lash out at every perceived threat, who see such behavior as the only way to protect themselves from a world that has turned its back on them. She has just never applied them to Kaz.

“I don’t know what was wrong with him,” Espen finishes looking confused. “Is he sick?”

“He’ll be fine,” Inej says because she doesn’t feel like trying to explain trauma to a Barrel kid who has been raised in a community that refuses to acknowledge anything but strength. “Do you know where he went after your argument?”

Espen shrugs. “Dunno. I didn’t see him go anywhere.”

“Okay,” Inej says taking a deep breath in an effort to contain her thoughts. “Thank you.”

(6)

She approaches the Slat the way she always has; by the roofs. She isn’t sure that she truly believes Kaz will be there, but she isn’t sure where else to start so she decides to take her chances.

The window she always entered Kaz’s room through, the window she often sat in feeding the crows, is closed with a dark curtain pulled down behind it. It takes her upwards of twenty minutes to figure out how to pick the Schuyler locks, but when she finally does she pulls the window open, pushes aside the curtain and steps inside.

The room is dark and cluttered which is strange because for all his money Kaz owns very little and keeps what he does in impeccable order. Now there are clothes and weapons strewn across the floor. As Inej steps inside she accidently steps on a sheet of paper that is scrawled over on both sides in Kaz’s handwriting. A number of other sheets of paper are spread across the rest of the floor like someone threw them.

She’s just reaching the conclusion that someone must have broken into Kaz’s room and ransacked it when she realizes the room is not empty. There’s a teenage boy-sized lump in the bed and on closer investigation she realizes it’s Kaz.

She knows that Kaz sleeps on his side, curled into the fetal position with his back pressed up against the nearest wall, but she has never seen him take it quite this far. He’s curled up so tightly that he’s almost in a legitimate ball. She knows that’s bad for his leg; he’ll be lucky if he can stand let alone walk when he gets up. His coal gray blanket is pulled up so that only his hair is visible. He isn’t using a pillow and after a second she realizes that’s because he’s clutching it to his chest like it’s the only thing keeping him from drowning in a stormy ocean.

“Kaz?” she asks her voice nervous. “Kaz.” He doesn’t stir so she crosses the room trying to step around the papers incase they’re important. When she reaches his side, she kneels down next to him. “Kaz.” She says a little louder, reaching out and pulling the blanket away from his face, careful not to touch any skin. “Kaz, wake up.”

He shifts slightly, but doesn’t straighten or release his death grip on the pillow. One eye cracks open just slightly then closes again and he buries his face in the pillow.

“Kaz,” she repeats. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

He moves again, just slightly and mutters something, but the words are rendered incomprehensible by the pillow.

“Kaz!” her voice is rising panic now, she grasps his blanket-covered shoulder and shakes him. “Look at me!”

(7)

As always, the physical contact gets a response from him. He bats her hands away with a motion that is a little more haphazard than it usually would be. His eyes open and he looks at her like he can’t decide if she’s actually there. “Inej?” he asks after a moment. “What are you doing here?”

“Looking for you,” Inej says. “Why aren’t you at Jesper and Wylan’s party?”

Kaz looks away. “I’m not going,” he says.

“Yes, I’d kind of figured that out,” she says perhaps a bit sharper than she intended to. She takes a deep breath and changes her tone before she goes on. “Are you still angry at me for the last time I was here?” he doesn’t say anything so she pushes onward. “Anika said you’ve been missing for a couple days. Are you okay?”

No answer.

“Kaz,” she presses. “Are you okay?”

Still no answer. He won’t even look at her.

“Kaz!” she shouts. He jumps which might have actually been funny under different circumstances. “Enough of this. Are You Okay?” She isn’t even sure why she’s continuing on this line of questioning when he pretty obviously not okay and she knows that if she does convince him to talk he’ll just lie. Perhaps she just wants the reassurance of knowing that he’s at least okay enough to lie to her.

If that’s what she wants she doesn’t get it, because Kaz says nothing. He just keeps looking away, eyes vacant and dead.

Just like their argument on the roof. She’d thought how silent he’d been then was wrong. They’ve argued before, but Kaz has never been quiet and listened. When Kaz is in an argument he lays into the other person with every ounce of cruel intelligence he possesses. Before that night, Inej had never won an argument with him. She should have known right away that something was wrong, but she’d been too angry and too high on her own victory to notice.

“Kaz,” Her voice softens, almost pleading. “What’s wrong?”

Finally he looks back at her, his eyes are still dead in a way that looks nothing like the Bastard of the Barrel. “Nothing,” he says. “I’m fine.”

Even though she was expecting this she can’t help but sigh. “Tell me the truth, Kaz.”

“I was sleeping,” Kaz says in a tone of voice that’s a little too flat for his defensive words. “Nothing more.”

“It’s ten thirty,” she points out.

He raises an eyebrow. “All kinds of people go to bed before that.”

“Not you,” Inej points out. It’s true; going to bed at midnight constitutes as early for Kaz Brekker. “Come on, Kaz.”

“I’m fine,” he says. “Leave me alone and let me sleep.”

Then he curls up on the bed again with his back facing her.

(8)

She can’t get him to start talking to her again, no matter how much she pleads. When she tries shaking him again he just shoves her off and pulls the blanket over his head.

Eventually she realizes that she’s unlikely to get any response from him. She’s going to be stuck waiting for the unlikely possibility that he’ll relent and tell her what’s wrong. She stands up. “I’m going to clean up this room a little,” she told him. “I’ll be right here if you decide you want to talk.”

Kaz doesn’t answer.

Inej sighs and sets to work on the mess Kaz has made. There’s an empty whiskey bottle lying on the floor and when she picks it up she realizes that it’s that super expensive whiskey she and Kaz stole once. Trust Kaz not to get drunk on something cheap.

She throws the bottle away, then turns to the papers spread out across the floor. After she picks up a couple she realizes they’re part of a letter. It takes her the better part of fifteen minutes to gather them all up and figure out what order they go in, but then her curiosity gets the better of her and she starts to read.

(9)

What she reads horrifies her.

If it wasn’t Kaz’s handwriting she would have thought someone else wrote it. The words don’t sound like Kaz Brekker. Kaz Brekker isn’t this open. He doesn’t talk like this. Kaz Brekker does not display this kind of abject self-hatred. Yet at the same time she knows that this horrible, untrue letter is Kaz and she knows that this is how he feels. This is what she abandoned him to without even realizing it.

She knew he had a lot armor, but she realizes now she may have given her understanding a bit too much credit. She had thought that she saw Kaz completely through the eyes of the almost eighteen year old woman she is now, but she realizes she was wrong. Somewhere inside of her a tiny portion of the fifteen year old girl she had been when Kaz rescued her from the Menagerie has been hanging on skewing her viewing of him. Back then she saw Kaz as something powerful and immortal, something strong enough to rise above the filth of Ketterdam, something that could make the monsters pay. That was what had drawn her to him in the beginning; the promise that perhaps, just perhaps he could make her something like that too.

Over the years that view of Kaz had started to die as she realized that Ketterdam took something from everyone, realized she did not need to be a monster. She’d also realized that Kaz was no demon, no immortal being, he was just a boy who had suffered trauma every bit as great as hers.

If Inej was honest with herself, Kaz had done more than just buy her indenture; he was why she wasn’t like some of the blank-eyed people she pulls out of slaver holds. From the instant she’d left the Mangerie, she’d never had the chance to sink into the blackness of her own despair because Kaz had always been there pushing her to move climb a little faster, hit a little harder, to be more than that girl who’d been sold in the brothels. He had saved her, even if he’d never intended to, even if he hadn’t even realized he was doing it. She had owed him the same, and she’d failed.

She sits on the floor and presses her forehead against her knees. She’d left Ketterdam thinking that she didn’t need Kaz anymore. That is at least kind of true; she no longer relies on him to determine her identity the she once did. She’s her own person with her own goals in her reach, but she’d forgotten to wonder whether Kaz needs her more than she needs him.

She turns to him. She doesn’t know what she’s going to say to him, but she knows that she needs to say something. “Kaz…” she whispers. He doesn’t respond, but his shoulders aren’t as tight as they were before so she thinks he’s fallen back to sleep.

She carefully pulls the blanket back around his shoulders so it’s no longer covering his face. Then she carefully steps towards the window. She isn’t sure what she needs to do to fix this and the only thing she can think of is that the only food Kaz keeps in his rooms is dry, gross stuff that doesn’t spoil. Food is like a bandage on a gaping wound, but it is something she can do right now.

Before she leaves she thinks about trying to find all Kaz’s knives and lock them up. She doesn’t know if Kaz will try to hurt himself, but she also knows that she’s unlikely to find all the knives he has hidden. She decides she’s better off just moving quickly and hoping to be back before he wakes up.

She takes one last look at his crumpled form and leaps out the window.

(10)

Her first stop is at the Van Eck mansion. She writes a note to Anika saying that she’s found Kaz, and one to Jesper and Wylan saying that something has come up and that she’ll make it up to them later. She doesn’t mention anything about the kind of shape Kaz is in. She’s not going to tell anyone about what’s going on without his blessing.

She gives the letters to one of the servants then sneaks into the kitchens. She makes off with some meat and vegetables because it will be easier than finding a shop to break into. She’ll pay Jesper and Wylan back later.

After leaving the mansion she stops by the Wraith to grab a few things. This only takes a few minutes and the crewmember on watch doesn’t even notice that she’s there. She makes a mental note to give her crew a talking to about how to be on guard duty, but right now she has bigger problems.

As she heads back to the Slat she passes by the small toy shop where she got the stuffed crow she gave to Alby Rollins before she left Ketterdam. She picks the simple lock on the backdoor and lets herself in. The shop is just as small and quaint as it was the last time she was here. She remembers belatedly that she’d promised the owner she’d convince Kaz to put this shop under Dregs protection in exchange for making the crow toy in a matter of hours. She’d forgotten in the whirlwind of preparations for her voyage. She renews that promise to herself as she looks at the wares spread out around the dark shop. She should not get in the habit of breaking her promises.

She wanders through the store looking at all the cute, fluffy stuffed toys. She isn’t exactly sure why she came here, but she feels like she needs to be here.

Eventually she stops before a rack of stuffed bears. She had a bear toy as a child. She remembers hugging it to her chest and feeling safe. She wonders briefly what happened to it when she got too old to want it anymore. Suddenly she hopes her parents didn’t get rid of it. She would like to see it again.

As she runs her fingers along the shelves of stuffed bears she wonders if Kaz ever had a toy like this. She has spent a lot of time recently trying to figure out exactly where Kaz came from. She knows that at some point in his life someone must have cared for him--he would have died as an infant if he’d been completely abandoned from the moment he was born--but she hasn’t been able to figure out who. She knows Kaz had a brother, but she doesn’t even know what his name was let alone how much older he was. Perhaps this older brother raised Kaz in the Barrel and then ran afoul of Pekka Rollins.

The only person who could answer her questions is Kaz and he’s so close-lipped about himself that it’s honestly a miracle he admitted he even had a brother. She wishes she could convince him to talk to her. She wants to help him, and talking always helps.

She shakes herself. She’s not helping Kaz by sitting in a toy shop and leaving him all alone. She starts to leave, then pauses and turns back to the rack of bears. She suddenly becomes aware of the idea that has been forming in her mind the entire time she’s been in this shop. She’s fully aware it might be a terrible idea and that he might refuse it at best and assume she’s mocking him at worst, but she feels like it’s something she needs to do.

She chooses to a medium-sized bear with a soft, cuddly body; silky, caramel-colored fur and a sweet, reassuring face that doesn’t have any uncomfortable wires in it. She sets the tag on the shop counter along with twice the kruge the owner is charging and slides the bear into a bag she took from Jesper and Wylan’s.

She leaves the shop, locking the door carefully behind her. Then she takes a deep breath, collects herself and takes to the rooftops for the journey back to the Slat.

That teddy bear is probably the one concession to fluff you’ll get out of me. I read a headcanon post on Tumblr once where Inej wins a stuffed animal in a throwing contest and gives it to Kaz, and ever since I’ve been sort of obsessed with the idea.

One more part left. Hopefully it will get out soon, but I’ll make no promises.

Thank you for reading!

Emjen

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