#it’s funny because their dads suck ass | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

here2bbtstrash · 1 year

Text

real magic (explicit)

genre: smut, fluff, bangin’ your boss, m attempts kidfic - part of a hyung holiday collab !

pairing: namjoon x reader

summary: the holiday season has never meant anything to you beyond suffering long hours for minimum wage and awaiting the collapse of capitalism— but this year, you’d be willing to add making out with your dilf coffee shop boss to the list.

word count: 16.7k 😩

contains: ~*~explicit sexual content (after kind of a slow burn sorry lol)~*~ the "moving back to your hometown" hallmark trope, a nick jonas poster (yes that's a warning), some taekook slander in the beginning because i thought it was funny, namjoon is so buff and so dumb but so wise and so hot, moni is a little shit, namjoon is a dad!, namjoon's kid uses they/them pronouns but it's not like A Focus of the story it's just flavor, reader thinks joon has a dead wife for like one second 💀 mentions of teenage pregnancy and co-parenting, one incredibly stupid asshole customer lmao, mint choco slander (it's what namjoon would want 😌), obviously there is an employee/boss power dynamic but they talk about it and figure it out because this is namjoon and he overthinks everything, namjoon driving (he's a dad i have to assume he would get his license if he had a literal child!!!!!!!!) and a lotta sentimental holiday and life talk. here are ur sex specific warnings: making out/going to second base in a car in a parking lot (what is it with my namjoons and cars in parking lots yo), fingering, semi-drunk sex, and fuckin' rawwwww with a smidge of size and breeding kink lmao (but she's on the pill!!! no more kids!!!!!!)

A/N: hello hello hi merry crisis this damn fic is finally here lmao~ as i have been babbling on about for days i really really (REALLY) love how this namjoon turned out he's just hesjkrgdhtgk such a fucking himbo but a good dad and wise and did i mention hot aaaaaa 🫠 all the love in my gay little heart to @goodsoop for their barista wisdom and real life experiences that went into this one (the cookie story will never not make me laugh) ! and to @sailoryooons for beta reading this 50 million times and encouraging me when i was convinced it sucked ass, and also for making all the gorgeous banners for this collab 😭

which btw - be sure to go check out @gimmethatagustd & @sailoryooons & @nabiolive 's fics tooooo !!! i've loved collabing with them so very much even when we were all hashtag Going Through It, we got the whole damn hyung line you hear meeeeee 🎁🎁🎁🎁

read on AO3!

Rudely awoken by the incessant beep of your alarm, you open your eyes to find Nick Jonas staring back at you, and you sit up with a scream.

Realization washes over your sleep-addled brain in waves: first, that you aren’t actually staring at a real person. He’s just smizing on a hot pink poster, held up by some remarkably durable masking tape you stuck to the wall fifteen years ago. Second, it comes back to you that you are staring at said poster because you’ve woken up in your childhood bedroom. It’s been left untouched since you were a teenager, like a weird time capsule of all your high school obsessions.

After reaching for your phone to silence the alarm, you kick your way out from under the blankets, trying not to make eye contact with Nick, or Justin, or Zayn as you stumble to the bathroom. The circumstances of your grand return to living in your goddamn parents’ house linger like a bad taste in your mouth, one that all the tongue brushing in the world can’t remove.

It still doesn’t feel real. Taehyung, your best friend in the world since freshman year of college, kicked you out. Sure, it may have been phrased more like a gentle request, but as far as your ego is concerned, it still feels like exile. Banishment, even. The person you thought you could never be parted from made his choice, and he chose his fucking boyfriend over you.

Jungkook. You think the name with all the venom your cold, dead heart can manage as you spit toothpaste into the sink.

Jungkook, the weird, bug-eyed kid who put his toe-socked feet on your couch, drank his banana milk out of your favorite mug, and ate up all of your Samyang ramyeon because he ‘thought it was communal’.

Jungkook, who ruined your sleep schedule nightly, either by fucking Taehyung senseless on the other side of your paper-thin apartment wall, or by blasting the same four Ariana Grande songs over and over on his bluetooth speaker and singing along in an annoyingly good voice. Either activity would go on well into the early hours of the morning, until you had to bang on the wall so hard you nearly put your fist through it.

Jungkook, whose dog once took a shit right on the floor in the middle of the kitchen.

Bam was cute enough to forgive, of course. But you can never forgive Taehyung for his betrayal. Especially when he knew you’d just been fired from your shitty coffee shop job for the stupidest reason ever, and he didn’t let that derail or even delay him. He still went ahead and delivered the killing blow.

Et tu, Taehyung? you think angrily to yourself as you stand in front of the suitcase containing as much of your closet as you could possibly fit. You still need to go back for your bigger furniture, and little things like your plates and your mugs and your silverware, which Jungkook is probably putting his grimy little fingers all over at this very moment. But until you’ve checked out of your indefinite vacation at the Nightmare Parental Hotel, there doesn’t really seem a point.

If you were less upset, you might take consolation in the fact that your parents aren’t actually here, that they’ve jaunted off to their timeshare until the new year, but you’re busy being too swallowed whole by your misery to find an ounce of joy in any piece of your current reality.

You dig through the pile of clothes until you manage to pull out something halfway decent. The first order of business now that you’ve moved back in is simple: acquire another stupid coffee shop job. You have no plans to stick around long, you just need something seasonal that will give you some meager income while you start looking for a real gig, one that is ideally not in your hometown.

Watching yourself in the mirror as you pull on a simple black blouse and your least-stained pair of jeans, you attempt to mentally dust off your interview skills. You conjure up your best fake smile and customer service voice, both of which are second-nature at this point.

Why do you want this job? “I’m just so passionate about coming home sticky and verbally abused by caffeine-addicted assholes every night.”

What’s your biggest weakness? “Clearly it’s the fact that I’m a ray of fucking sunshine.”

Why were you terminated from your last job? “Oh, well, I attempted to get my previous employer to improve their standards of worker treatment. You see, I selfishly requested that they raise the bar a single notch above hell. Certainly won’t happen again!”

This should go well, you tell yourself, and your reflection grimaces back.

With several hours to kill before your job interview and a growing desire to avoid the weird nostalgia of your childhood that seems to lurk in every corner of your parents’ house, you decide to take a walk.

The sky is bright blue and cloudless, and though the air is brisk, it isn’t terribly windy. You tuck in your earbuds as you shut the front door behind you and pick a direction, aimless, letting your mind wander to the soundtrack of your “seasonal depression” playlist.

A whole new crop of families must have moved into your parents’ neighborhood in the years since you moved out, because the streets are more alive with kids than you can ever remember them being, even when you were a kid yourself. Bikes and scooters lay abandoned on the sidewalks between homes, and you can hear the repeated echo of a basketball dribbling on a driveway, punctuated by distant, playful screaming.

Even in the daytime, you can tell these families have spared no expense when it comes to Christmas decor: some homes have every eave outlined in string lights, some have candy cane stakes dug into the perimeter of their perfectly manicured lawns, and some have been seemingly invaded by small armies of inflatable reindeer and snowmen. You can’t help but giggle a little at the inflatable decorations that have been set to turn off during the day, the way the airless material lays limp in the grass, giving the impression of a yard strewn with dead bodies.

But you remember what it looked like when you drove in last night, everything lit up and brought to life.

Your parents definitely didn’t have inflatable lawn decorations when you were a kid, but you’d get so excited every year when your dad would drag the ladder out and spend the day stringing up the simple rainbow lights you did have. You still remember the little spark of joy you’d feel in your chest when the colors would click on after dark, the way you would run outside every night just to see them twinkle, your breath puffing steam clouds in the air, your bare feet freezing on the ice-cold driveway.

It felt like magic then. But somewhere along the way you grew up. And now that feeling’s gone. Even at night, the lights just look like… lights.

Distracted as you are by the music in your ears and thoughts of your childhood that have brought you to a standstill on the sidewalk, you don’t notice what’s happening until it’s too late.

A blur of red and white is suddenly circling around and between your legs, and you feel something twining over your ankles, then tugging with a force that threatens to knock you off balance. As you lean forward in an attempt to right yourself, the chaos in question slows enough for you to realize it’s a fluffy white dog in a red sweater, who has excitedly tangled you up in his leash.

You manage to find the looped end of the leash and slowly get yourself unwrapped while the dog continues to pant and jump and occasionally yap at you. With your legs freed, you squat down for a proper greeting, laughing to yourself as he lifts up on his hind legs, balancing his paws on your knee to lick an enthusiastic greeting across your cheek.

“Hi, puppy,” you murmur, trying to get him to hold still long enough to read the name on his tag. A voice beats you to it.

“Moni!”

When you glance up to find Moni’s owner jogging up the sidewalk, you have to make a conscious effort to keep your own tongue in your mouth, because good lord, he is fine.

He’s tall, towering over you even once you bring yourself back up to standing, and the black workout tank and athletic shorts he’s wearing do absolutely nothing to hide the thick, well-defined muscles of his arms, chest, and thighs.

Despite his lack of clothing in the cool winter air, you can see his face and neck are slick with sweat, his white-blonde hair damp with it too. There’s even a dark patch that’s soaked his shirt at his sternum, making the firm swell of his pecs that much more apparent. It takes you an extra second to break eye contact with them, but when you do finally manage to drag your gaze up to meet his, you realize his face is just as nice of a view: honey-tan skin, full lips, and cute dimples that pop as he gives a sheepish, appreciative laugh.

“Thank you,” he says, a little breathless; his voice is deep and slightly husky in a way that makes your face grow hot. You blink stupidly at him for a few moments, your mind reeling, and then it occurs to you that you still have his dog’s leash in your hand.

“No problem,” you manage, handing the looped end back over and double-checking to make sure your ankles are still free from their entanglement. Though now that this man is holding the leash, you kind of wish they weren’t.

“Moni’s usually good about not taking off when I stop to do a circuit,” he explains, like you’re the dog owner police. It makes you wonder what kind of Karens must have moved into this neighborhood since you left it. “I don’t know why he ran, maybe he saw a squirrel or something.”

“It’s okay,” you reassure him with a smile, admiring Moni as he stretches and settles into a polite seated pose. “I like his sweater.”

“Thanks,” he laughs again. “C’mon Mon.”

You can’t help focusing on how big this guy’s hands are as he slips his fingers through the end of Moni’s leash, tugging slightly as if to encourage the dog back in the direction he came from.

Moni blinks and stays right where he is.

“You little shit,” his owner huffs under his breath, and you have to bite down on your bottom lip to keep from laughing. You distantly realize you should probably leave them to it and continue on your walk, but this is too entertaining to turn away from now. Your hot neighbor tries one more futile attempt to get Moni to move, then seems to give up entirely.

He stoops down with a low grunt of effort that makes your core flutter as he grabs the fluffy dog and hoists him up in his arms. You try to force yourself to stop noticing the way his biceps flex, the fact that the muscles of his arms are nearly bigger than your head.

“Thanks again,” he says with a final grateful smile, and your only response is to swallow hard and stand there like an idiot as he turns and carries his spoiled dog back home.

When you arrive for your interview, you’re delighted to discover that Indigo Coffee is nothing like your last job. It’s warm and bright, with large picture windows that flood the space in sunlight, and there’s a cozy personal touch to it, the likes of which you’d certainly never see in your former corporate shell of a workplace. The sitting area is dotted with live edge wood tables and mismatched chairs. There are an array of framed paintings on the walls that look handmade in a good way, simple yet bold brush-stroke lines in a deep blue color scheme. And, you realize as your eyes linger, the shop is absolutely overflowing with plants: in simple clay pots lined up along the windows, free-standing between tables, and tucked into bookshelves placed artfully throughout the space.

You step closer to inspect one as you wait on your interviewer and are pleased to see that it’s real, that they all are— no waxy fake leaves jammed into a thick block of cement, but real greenery sprouted in real dirt, deep brown soil gone soft from what must have been a recent watering. These are plants someone cares for, coaxed and kept alive by someone’s time and patience and love. The thought makes you smile a little despite yourself.

There’s still fucking Christmas music playing, but you figure that’s inescapable this time of year.

“Are you here for the interview?” someone asks over your shoulder. As you turn away from the plant, you wonder if you’re imagining that the voice in question sounds slightly familiar, and then you find yourself once again staring up at a fine-ass man with white-blonde hair and a sweet pair of dimples.

He’s clearly showered since your last encounter, and is now slightly more covered up in a pair of faded jeans and a gray-green flannel thrown over a black shirt emblazoned with bold white lettering: Protect Trans Kids.

“Oh.” Moni’s owner blinks back at you, and the shock on his face is so apparent that a giggle escapes your lips before you can stop it. “Uh, hi again.”

“Hi,” you echo, equally flustered, before realizing you failed to answer his initial question. “Oh, yeah. Yes. I am. The interview. I’m— that’s me.” So well-spoken, you mentally kick yourself.

One dimple deepens slightly as he extends a hand. “Kim Namjoon. Owner of Indigo Coffee. And the world’s least obedient dog, as you saw earlier.”

You offer your best handshake in return and a smile that you surprisingly don’t have to force as you give Namjoon your name. He gestures to a table in the corner, and you each pull back a chair to have a seat. You try to banish any potential horny thoughts from your brain, but shifting into interview mode proves difficult as he rests his large hands on the table in front of him, drumming idly along to the horribly cheery music.

You manage to tear your gaze away from Namjoon’s fingers when he speaks again. “If it’s cool with you, we can just chat a little? I’m not so good at conducting formal interviews. Too inauthentic.”

It’s like you can feel some of the tension release from your shoulders. “I— yeah. That sounds great.”

“Cool,” he nods, and you try to ignore the rush of heat up your neck at the intensity of his stare. Professional, be professional. “So I saw on your resume that it looks like your last few jobs were out of town. Did you just move here?”

“Moved back,” you say quickly. “Yeah. I grew up here, actually.”

Namjoon’s eyes widen a little in clear interest. “Really? What brings you back?”

You purse your lips as you consider how to phrase it. “My life… kind of fell apart. So. I moved in with my parents for a bit. Like a winner.” His dimples pop when he smiles at your joke, and you drop your gaze to the table. “Just trying to figure out what’s next, and find something seasonal in the meantime.”

“Well, we could certainly use the help,” Namjoon admits. When you chance a glance up, there’s a look on his face like he’s choosing his next words carefully. “I saw in your application that you were terminated from your last position.” He leans in, lowering his voice slightly as he continues. “I’m gonna be honest, I hate that we even ask that question. But can you tell me a bit about what happened?”

You keep your stare fixed on the wood grain in front of you as you try to stay calm. “Well, if I can be honest too...” Squeezing your eyes shut, you tell yourself to just say it. “I was fired for trying to unionize.”

“Oh.” Namjoon sounds surprised, but you can’t manage to look at him. “Really?” You nod slowly, biting down on your bottom lip. “That’s— fucking illegal.”

That makes your gaze snap back up to meet his. His brow is furrowed slightly, a muscle in his jaw pulled tight.

“Yeah,” you say belatedly. “Yeah, I know. They made up a bunch of fake excuses as to why I was fired, but I knew what it really was. It was because I wanted them to actually pay us what we were worth, and hire more workers so we weren’t being scheduled to death. And I was getting everyone else riled up too, and I guess it scared them.”

Namjoon sits back in his chair, folding his arms over his chest. “Huh. Man. Well, I’m sorry that happened to you.”

It takes you a second to process what you’re hearing. Union has always been a scary word for any person in upper management you’ve previously encountered. You hadn’t expected this to be so… easy. For him to understand, or sympathize. “I— yeah. I am too.”

“If it makes you feel any better,” Namjoon continues quickly, “I think it’s great, what you tried to do. I’m very pro-union.” He pauses for a moment, his face twisting slightly in thought. “I mean, admittedly, we don’t have one here. Granted, there are only five of us. I should probably ask, though, if they want one.”

You can’t quite hide your smile. “I’m gonna take a guess that you probably treat your employees pretty well as-is.”

“I try,” he says with a shake of his head. His eyes meet yours again. “So, here’s the deal. You have a ton of experience, and with holiday time off and a few people out sick, I’m super understaffed right now. You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders, and hopefully you feel like you can come to me if you have any issues, without fearing retaliation.”

You blink slowly, and he must be able to read the disbelief on your face. “What I’m saying is I’m offering you the seasonal position,” he clarifies. “Is that— do you, uh, accept?”

“Yes.” The word is chased by a dazed laugh, and Namjoon’s dimples resurface around a small smile.

“Cool. I told you I’m bad at interviews,” he huffs, rubbing a hand at the back of his neck. You try to ignore the swell of his bicep, clearly visible even beneath his bulky flannel. “I know this is a lot to ask, but. Is there any chance you can start, like, right now? Because Jimin’s shift ends in…” He tilts a little, fishing his phone from the front pocket of his jeans, and his mouth drops open in surprise when he gets a glimpse at the time.

“Oh, shit,” Namjoon murmurs, and then he raises his voice to call across the mostly empty store. “Jimin-ah! I’m so sorry!”

You turn around, your gaze landing on the barista leaned up against the counter next to the register. His dyed-gray hair dusts over his eyes, which pull into crescent moons as he laughs. “It’s cool. I knew you were almost done. But I’m gonna clock out now, if she’s good?”

“Yeah,” you answer, turning back to Namjoon. “Yeah, I can start now.”

The two of you move behind the counter, and you sweep your hair up out of your face while Namjoon starts to go through a basic run-down of where everything is located. The overhead bell tinkles as Jimin shoulders the front door open, and he lifts a hand over his head in parting.

“See you after the holidays!”

“Alright,” Namjoon says as he waves to Jimin, a little breathless from having rambled on for the better part of several minutes. “That was a lot. Do you want to just start on register? I feel like that should be easy enough, and I can train you on everything as people come in, since it’s pretty dead right now.”

You shrug. “Works for me.”

Within half an hour, there’s a line out the door, and Namjoon has managed to spill espresso grounds all over his shoes for a second time.

“Ah, shit,” he groans, taking a step back. “Sorry. Been a minute since I’ve had to be back here.”

“It’s okay,” you try to reassure him, but you can see from the faces of the customers who have been waiting on their drinks for several minutes— including one who’s had hers remade three times, all of them incorrect— that it is very much not okay. You certainly lack the people skills to smooth over any of Namjoon’s mistakes, and you can feel a stress-induced eye twitch starting to flare up, brought on by Kelly Clarkson’s incessant yuletide belting.

You give your boss five more minutes, wherein he scalds his hand on the milk steamer, forgets about a cookie in the warmer until it’s burnt entirely black, and nearly turns the blender on with the lid off, before you finally intervene.

“Hey, Namjoon?” You do your best to keep your expression pleasant when he glances over at you, wiping at his brow with the back of his hand. “Maybe we should switch?”

“A-are you sure?” he stammers, apparently torn between wanting to be a good boss and a clear desire to just take the L. “I feel bad, this is literally your first shift.”

“I think I can handle it,” you reassure him, lowering your voice a little. “Let me take care of the drinks, and you can do your… endearing golden retriever thing. Keep the people entertained.”

Color blooms in the apples of his cheeks as his dimples make a brief appearance. “Oh, okay. Can do. Just let me know if you need help.”

You can’t imagine a universe where his clumsiness could in any way be considered helpful, but you keep that thought to yourself as you smile at him. At least he’s cute.

Things improve dramatically once your roles are reversed: as you expected, Namjoon is far more charismatic than he is coordinated, and he chats endlessly with the people waiting on their drinks, hardly pausing long enough to take a breath, while you scramble around trying to get your bearings in a new environment. The steady stream of customers doesn’t let up for the rest of the evening, until the last few finally trickle out of the store a few minutes after close, and you waste no time locking the door behind them with a sigh of relief.

You spin around, letting your back thud against the door for a moment as you watch Namjoon fight with a broom and dustpan in a futile attempt to get espresso dust out of the grout between the tiles. There’s a dull ache starting to thud in your skull, and it’s only deepened by the shrill opening notes of another fucking a cappella song.

“Namjoon?” you ask as you cross toward the counter, and his head instantly snaps up. “Do you think we could maybe turn off the Christmas music?”

“Oh, sure.” He’s already fumbling to grab his phone, and he taps a few buttons until the music suddenly switches, a soft voice starting to croon over an old school beat.

“Thanks,” you say, and you can’t help the pity smile that pulls up your mouth when he returns to his useless task. “I think the grout might be a lost cause, but I can go ahead and mop whenever you’re ready.”

He rights himself with a defeated sigh, nodding his head to the storage closet in the back. You follow his lead to retrieve the mop, then set about filling up the bucket with water and cleaning solution. Namjoon’s voice floats in from the front of the shop as he busies himself with his own closing tasks.

“Imagine smokin’ weed in the street without cops harassin’ / Imagine goin’ to court with no trial / Lifestyle cruisin’ blue Bahama waters / No welfare supporters, more conscious of the way we raise our daughters...”

You’re laughing a little as you roll the bucket out, starting at the door to work your way back. “Is this… Nas?”

He glances up, like he’s just remembered other people exist in the world. “Yeah, sorry. I can turn it off.”

“No, no,” you say quickly when he starts to reach for his phone again. “This is good. Much better than Pentatonix. I’m just… you really know every word.”

Namjoon shrugs, clearly embarrassed. “He’s my favorite.”

The revelation surprises you, and you pause to think as you pull the mop back and forth over the tile floor. It didn’t even occur to you that Namjoon would have a favorite kind of music, apart from the soft elevator muzak you imagine must play on a steady loop in his brain, given the way he fumbles through life.

“I actually wanted to be a rapper,” his voice comes back, and you look up again, your interest piqued. “When I was younger. But you know. Life had other plans.”

“Ah yes, the rapper to coffee shop owner pipeline,” you muse, and he barks a laugh that you wish you didn’t find so hot. Shaking your head, you force yourself to look back down at the espresso-studded tile, doing your best to shove your attraction aside and not think about it. He’s your boss, dumbass.

Still, it’s hard to ignore, particularly as he continues to rap along to each song that comes on, his voice deeper and huskier than you’ve heard it thus far in casual conversation. He doesn’t miss a word, and you can’t deny that it’s impressive. And sexy. Fuck.

Once the floor has been successfully mopped and everything else is put back together, you hop up onto the counter to wait for the tile to dry, and your gaze lingers over Namjoon’s large hands as he cashes out the register. He flips through the bills in time to the music, still humming under his breath as he goes, and you do your best to hold in your laugh when he inevitably loses count and has to start over from the beginning. Thankfully the second attempt sticks, and he smiles proudly to himself as he zips everything up into the deposit bag.

“First shift down,” he announces, as if you might have forgotten, and then his eyes find yours and you swear your breath gets stuck in your throat. “How do you feel?”

It only occurs to you now how close he’s standing to you, and with the way your legs are casually dangling over the edge of the counter, it wouldn’t take much for him to step between them. And god, he’s so damn tall, you’re practically eye-to-eye.

“Uh,” you manage, your mouth suddenly gone dry. “Good. I feel good.”

“That’s good,” he answers, his voice dipping into that throaty tone again. You find yourself wondering absentmindedly if maybe Namjoon has a customer service voice, too, and then for the briefest flash of a moment, his gaze flits from your eyes to your lips and back again. It’s so quick, you can’t be sure it even really happened.

You tell yourself it’s just your exhausted post-shift brain seeing things that aren’t there, wanting this fine-ass man to be into you, too.

A sudden bang on the front door makes you flinch so hard, you come dangerously close to kneeing Namjoon in the crotch. He takes a large step back as you whip around to look over your shoulder, only to see a kid’s face pressed to the glass, framed by two small hands. You’ve never been great at telling the age of children on sight, but this one looks like… maybe a middle schooler?

“Whose fucking kid is that?” you say automatically, blinking, dumbfounded. Namjoon’s laugh is a low rumble behind you.

“That would be mine.”

It takes several days for the shock to wear off. Your boss has a kid. Kim “could’ve burnt the building down with a single cookie” Namjoon is at least partially responsible for keeping another human being alive. Which means you have a crush… on a father.

A father who also happens to be your boss.

You try not to think about any of it.

There’d been brief introductions when you left the shop that first night, but all you’d really managed to glean was the kid’s name, Sol, and their pronouns. As someone who is historically terrible with children, you’d excused yourself the minute Namjoon locked the front door, after what felt like an eternity spent watching him pat each of his pockets twice before he finally managed to find his keys.

“I hope it wasn’t weird,” your boss says out of nowhere in the middle of your next shift, during a much-needed moment of peace after the morning rush. “For you to meet Sol like that. It’s just been hard, since their mom, uh…”

Namjoon trails off, leaving the sentence unfinished. You glance up, eyes widening as you put the pieces together.

“Oh my god,” you breathe. “I’m so sorry.”

His gaze meets yours, and it’s like you can see the wheels in his head turning before he catches up. “No, no,” he says quickly, and then he starts to laugh. “Wow, I really did not start that sentence well. She’s not dead. She just got married, and she’s on her honeymoon for most of December. The logistics have been hard, is what I meant.”

An embarrassed heat creeps up your neck, and your elbows thud against the countertop as you press your face into your hands, attempting to muffle your own laughter. “In my defense,” you groan, “you really made it sound like you had a dead wife.”

“Not dead! She’s fine!” Namjoon’s dimples are as prominent as you’ve ever seen them when you peek up at him from your full-body cringe. “Very much alive, very much not my wife.” The muscles in his arms flex as he crosses them over his chest, leaning up against the counter next to the register. “Never was, actually.”

“Really?” you answer automatically, your damned curiosity getting the better of you.

He nods, his voice a little more serious when he continues, rambling on in the way that you’ve already started to suspect is his default setting, talking as if to fill empty space. “We were seventeen when we got pregnant. I knew we were young then, but I don’t think I really realized. Now that I’m almost thirty, I know: seventeen is fucking young.”

The line of his jaw tightens, thoughtful, as his gaze sweeps over the floor. “I thought I wanted to marry her, or at least felt obligated to. Like it was the right thing to do, but. We didn’t have any money, and then it all got so hectic after Sol was born. Didn’t even take a year for us to realize it wasn’t gonna work, not for us.”

You blink, trying to take in all the new information. “That sounds really hard.”

“It was,” Namjoon admits. “But we were both on the same page about it. That no matter what, Sol had to come first.” He glances up with a shrug. “It’s all good now. She’s a great co-parent, and her new husband is really good for her. And… well, I have Indigo.”

The tinkling of the bell at the front door snaps you out of a daze, makes you realize you’ve been staring at him, dumbfounded. You do your best to shoot Namjoon a soft smile, and to ignore the pang in your chest as he turns to greet the customer that’s just wandered in, already starting to babble on about the weather.

You find yourself more grateful for Namjoon’s presence with each passing shift, in a way that you try to convince yourself is thoroughly platonic. Between fairly steady work and his very steady chatter, your time spent in the warm, sunny space of Indigo turns out to be a good distraction from your own miserable excuse for a life. The repetitive motions of making drink after drink are oddly comforting, and you have to admit, Namjoon really is good with the customers.

“Peppermint mocha to go.”

You do your best to follow up the sentence with a polite smile as you set a drink down for the customer who has done nothing but scowl at you the whole time you were making it. The silent prayer you’ve sent out to the universe that he’ll take whatever personal problem he has elsewhere and leave you alone has clearly gone unanswered.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” he snaps, and you can feel your shoulders creep up towards your ears in anticipation of nothing good. Here we fucking go.

You blink twice, trying to keep your service persona engaged. “I’m sorry, is that not what you ordered?” It is, you know it is, you heard him say it.

“No, that’s mine,” the man quickly responds, reaching out to snatch the cup in a motion that makes you flinch. “But do you hear this fucking song?”

The honest answer is no: at this point the ever-present Christmas music might as well be white noise, so you have to make a conscious effort to tune back in and listen. It’s a few seconds, and then you pick up on the melody. “…Last Christmas?”

“Uh, yeah,” he continues, explaining like you’re stupid. “The original. Last Christmas by Wham!” When it’s clear you still aren’t putting the pieces together, he scoffs in pure frustration. “You just made me lose Whamageddon! I’ve won every year for the last five years, I can’t believe you would even put this on your fucking playlist!”

Your face pulls into an incredulous grimace before you can think to control it. “Uh, I’m sorry, but I didn’t make the—”

He cuts you off. “First off, I don’t need the fucking attitude. And surely you’re at least capable of checking what songs are on there, right? That’s not too advanced for you to handle?”

You didn’t even hear Namjoon walk up from the back office, but he’s suddenly stepping in front of you, and you’re more than glad to move back and let him handle this dude before you end up in jail. “Woah, woah, alright,” Namjoon interjects, his voice loud enough to carry. “What’s going on?”

The man beats you to it. “I’m trying to file a legitimate complaint and she’s rolling her fucking eyes and getting an attitude with me!”

“It’s the song,” you explain briefly, trying to keep everything about your expression neutral. “He’s mad that we’re… playing Wham.”

Namjoon’s face twists in an expression that you would find funny if you weren’t so fucking livid, one that you’re pretty sure is the mirror image of your own reaction minutes earlier. “The song? Seriously?”

You can see the guy scrambling, clearly starting to get embarrassed at his own dramatics. “Alright, I don’t have time for this. I guess I just need to take my business elsewhere, because this is ridiculous. What ever happened to the customer is always right?”

Namjoon goes silent for a minute, and you try to ignore the way the look on his face makes your pulse quicken, thudding brightly in the hollow of your neck. His voice is deadly serious when he speaks again. “I appreciate that you’re upset, but if you’re going to look my employee in the face, after she just performed a service for you, and disrespect her like that? Over a fucking song? Nah, I’m not gonna tolerate it. Maybe the next time you want someone to make you a toothpaste drink, you should take your ass to Starbucks.”

It takes every ounce of strength you have to keep the reaction off your face until the asshole has stormed out the front door, nasty drink in hand. As the bell finally tinkles to signal his departure, you collapse forward, just barely catching yourself on the counter so you don’t crumple straight down to the floor.

“Oh my god.” Your laugh of disbelief comes out more like a groan, at the ridiculous complaint and your boss’ insanely attractive comeback alike. “I fucking hate this time of year.”

“Hey.” The word is punctuated by Namjoon’s shoulder bumping into yours, and you look back up at him, still laughing a little at your own misery. His eyes search yours, sincere. “Assholes are assholes no matter what season it is. I’m sure that guy finds plenty of things to complain about the other eleven months of the year, too. Don’t let him ruin it for you.”

You can’t help rolling your eyes, if only because you can do it freely now, without a man standing over you and yelling about your ‘bad attitude’. “I guess,” you huff. “And thank you.”

Namjoon shakes his head, like it’s nothing. “Chin up, okay?”

The two of you breeze through closing that night, familiar enough to fall into a steady routine now. You’re wiping everything down behind the counter and humming along to Tupac when Namjoon’s voice drags you back out of your thoughts in a way you’ve already grown accustomed to.

“You know…”

You glance up, only to realize that he’s started to flip chairs on top of tables to clear the floor, and is grabbing them two at a time, one in each hand. The image makes you a little dizzy, and you tell yourself to focus on his words, not his biceps.

“I think we make a pretty good team,” he concludes.

“Yeah,” you breathe, trying to keep your composure at the unexpected compliment. “I was thinking the same thing. And thanks again for, you know. Handling that guy.”

Namjoon shrugs, like it’s nothing. “Hey, you’re doing me a favor, taking this seasonal job. I’m not about to let anyone fuck with you.”

You bite down on a smile as you head towards the back to grab the mop, and then you hear a loud bang on the front door— it’s another sound you’ve gotten used to in your brief time at Indigo. There’s the click of the deadbolt, chased by the tinkling overhead bell and Namjoon’s chiding voice. “Homie, if you break my door I’m gonna make you get a job to pay me back for it.”

“You think I don’t know about child labor laws?” you hear Sol retort, clearly not intimidated, and the attitude in their voice has you biting back a laugh.

Wheeling the mop bucket out of the storage closet, you glance up to see Namjoon jut his chin toward the large front window, indicating Sol to take a seat on the ledge. “Feet off the floor, she’s tryna clean.”

Sol complies, plopping down in the window with their eyes glued to their phone as Namjoon disappears back toward the office to grab his things. You watch as Sol pulls their knees into their chest so their chunky black boots clear the tile, and you can’t help noticing that said boots are adorned with oversized silver bat-shaped buckles, reflecting the amber streetlight gleam that leaks through the window.

“I like your boots,” you say, more to yourself than Sol, half expecting them to be so engrossed in TikTok that they don’t even hear you.

But to your surprise, Sol looks up.

“Thanks,” they say, glancing at their feet. “I just got them. I’m in my post-hardcore era right now.”

The statement is delivered without a trace of irony, and you do your best to hold in another amused giggle as you respond. “Wow, you are… so much cooler than I was when I was your age.”

Sol seems to consider this for a moment, then shrugs. “I mean, you didn’t have the internet back then, right?”

The question hits you like a train, and you have to pause and press a hand over your heart at the impact. “Okay, ouch, I’m not that old.” They grimace apologetically, and you lean up against the mop handle in thought. “But the internet definitely wasn’t like it is now. The only social media that really existed was Myspace, and my parents wouldn’t let me make one. I mostly just used the internet to, like, play RuneScape.”

“Oh shit,” Sol remarks, sounding remarkably like Namjoon in the process. “You played old school?!”

It’s like you can feel your bones crumbling to dust inside your body, and you wince as you resume dragging the mop over the tile. “Hey, back then it was the only kind of RuneScape we had. But yes, you can consider me a… founding father of that game.”

“That’s cool!” they exclaim, sounding so genuine it makes your head spin. When did RuneScape become cool again? “My friends and I play old school all the time. It’s the best, for real.”

You shake your head in disbelief as you continue to mop, and a long pause settles between you, with Sol’s interest clearly returning to their phone.

Fuck, you think to yourself, what else do kids even talk about? Marvel movies? It’s like your mind has gone totally blank, unable to conjure up a single topic of conversation, and you practically huff out an audible sigh of relief when their voice breaks the silence again.

“I think my dad has been happier since you started working here.”

The mop nearly slips out of your hands entirely, and you glance up, eyes wide. “I— really?”

Sol nods, playing absentmindedly with the strings of their black hoodie, then bringing the end of one up to their mouth to gently chew on. “It’s a theory I have. A game theory. I plan to ask additional follow-up questions tonight.”

At this, you can’t help but laugh. “Well, I’m sure your investigation will be very thorough.”

There’s a flash of a dimple in Sol’s cheek, like the mirror image of their dad. “I can tell you what he says, if you want.”

You wonder how telling your own smile is. “I mean… I can’t say I’m not curious.” You’re distantly aware of the sound of the office door closing, chased by Joon whistling to himself, and you lower your voice conspiratorially as you drop the mop back into the bucket. “I look forward to hearing what you find out.”

Monday morning, when you wake up to the omnipresent smize of Nick Jonas, you can’t help smiling back.

You made it through your first week of work, and it wasn’t even that torturous. And best of all, Namjoon reminded you the night before that Indigo is closed on Mondays, which gives you an entire day to spend as you please. A real day off, which was truly unheard of at your last job, where you’d spend your non-scheduled days still anticipating an incoming emergency text asking you to cover a shift last-minute. More often than not, you’d end up working after all.

“But not today,” you announce to Nick.

A grand plan has already started to form in your head, one that involves a party size bag of Hot Cheetos and all eight episodes of The Fabulous, and yet. There’s a lingering urge at the back of your brain that you can’t quite ignore. With all the day-off energy you can muster, you drag yourself out of bed and tug on a pair of leggings and a sweatshirt, then shuffle into the bathroom to at least make yourself halfway decent.

You’re just going for a quick walk around the block to get some fresh air, you tell yourself. That’s all. Certainly no other reason.

It’s only a few minutes after you step out your front door that a fluffy white blur nearly collides with your shins, and when you stoop down to lift Moni into your arms, you once again can’t keep the smile off your face. Huh, who could’ve seen this coming?

But when you glance up, there’s no hot buff man jogging up the sidewalk after his dog. In fact, you realize as you look back at the ball of fluff in your arms, he isn’t wearing a leash or harness at all, just another cute sweater.

“Are you even supposed to be out here?” you ask Moni. His only answer is to drag his tongue up the side of your face.

You shift him a little in your arms so you can fumble for the tag attached to his collar, and thankfully, there’s an address listed. It takes you a second to get your bearings in the neighborhood, having not lived here for close to a decade, but it eventually comes back to you where the listed street is, and you start to walk. Moni is already blinking sleepily in your arms, clearly enjoying his preferred mode of transportation.

A laugh bubbles up in your chest as you approach the house in question— even if you hadn’t had Moni’s tag to guide you, finding his home would’ve been easy enough as soon as you passed this street, because you can hear old school hip-hop bumping through a speaker despite still being several houses down the block. You suppose Namjoon can get away with it during the day, when all the neighborhood kids are still in school.

As you make your way up the driveway, you realize the music is actually coming from behind the house, and when you follow the path that leads around back, you spot the culprit: a simple wooden-slat fence surrounds the yard, and the gate has been left wide open.

Before you can even make it over the threshold, a familiar voice reaches your ears, sounding much closer than the music. “Ah, shit.”

Namjoon comes barreling through the open gate so fast he practically runs you over, and Moni yaps, like he’s annoyed at being jostled as you quickly try to stumble out of his owner’s path.

“Oh. Uh, hi.”

You wonder if you’ll ever be able to take in how shock looks on Namjoon’s features without giggling a little. Today is certainly not that day. It’s just so endearing, the way his eyes widen and his mouth pulls into a perfect o-shape.

“Hi,” you breathe out around your laughter, trying to ignore the heat that flushes into your face when his dimples appear in return. “I think I found something that belongs to you.”

With a wave of his hand and several profuse thank yous, you follow Namjoon back through the gate, and wait until he firmly shuts it behind you before letting Moni down to trot off across the yard. It’s only now that you take Namjoon in properly: he’s in a gray hoodie under a pair of denim overalls, both of which are splattered artfully with paint in a variety of colors.

“I was just in my studio,” he explains, tipping his head toward the small shed in the yard, which you quickly realize is also the source of the music that led you here. “Doin’ some art. Do you, uh… wanna see?”

“Yeah, okay,” you answer with a nod.

“Fair warning, I’m really bad at it,” he calls over his shoulder as he leads you in the open studio door, raising his voice to be heard over the music. He reaches for his phone, propped up in the windowsill, to turn the volume down a few notches.

There’s an easel up against the far wall holding what must be his current project, a half-finished scene that you realize upon closer inspection is thousands of tiny dots of color, painstakingly blotted onto the canvas to form a mountain landscape at a distance. A few more pieces that he’s already completed have been leaned up against another wall to dry, one featuring an abstract array of featherlight brushstrokes, and another where the paint’s been globbed on in thick layers.

Namjoon is talking a mile a minute as you inspect the canvases. “I thought maybe I’d do cyanotypes today, but it’s not sunny enough, and I’ve made that mistake before. I’m really into texture right now, so I’m trying out some different techniques with paint. I want to get better at pointillism, but it’s a lot harder than you’d think it would be. ‘Cause it’s just dots, right? But you have to be able to see the forest for the trees, too.”

“These are amazing,” you finally manage to murmur, and to your surprise, the compliment actually renders him silent. When you turn back over your shoulder to look at him, he’s glancing down, almost like he’s embarrassed.

“Thanks. But I just do it for fun. ‘Cause I love art.”

“I can tell,” you say, and when he looks up, you offer him a smile you hope reads as encouraging. “Did you make the art at work, too?”

He nods, still sheepish, and that answer also surprises you. You recall thinking on your first day that the paintings hung on the walls looked handmade, but it never crossed your mind that they might have been made by Namjoon’s hands. Maybe because you’ve grown so accustomed to seeing him drop and break things, you haven’t ever considered him as also capable of… creation.

And yet, here he is. Proving you wrong.

“Sorry,” Namjoon’s voice makes you refocus on him, and your brow furrows in confusion at the unexpected apology. “This is literally your one day away from me and here I am, taking up your time. Thanks again for bringing Moni back.”

“It’s okay.” You shrug. “Don’t have much going on today, honestly. I never really know what to do with myself when I’m not working. Which I’m aware is very sad.”

“Well, uh,” Namjoon starts, and when he takes a single step closer, you swear you feel something flutter in your stomach— or maybe lower. “Sol’s got a half-day today, since it’s the last day before break, so I’m picking them up in a bit. And we were gonna go on a hike, probably take Moni too. You’re welcome to join us, if you’d like?”

Your eyes widen at the invitation. “Oh. That sounds great. I mean, if you’re sure I wouldn’t be intruding?”

He shakes his head, the corner of his mouth pulling up just so. “Nah. I actually think Sol really likes you. At least, they wouldn’t stop asking questions about you at dinner last night.”

“Is that right?” You do your best to keep your expression neutral.

Namjoon drives far enough north that there’s actually snow on the ground when you climb out of his front seat. You shove your hands into the pockets of your jacket as you follow him across the gravel parking lot towards the trailhead, a few paces behind Sol and Moni.

Sol shoots an expression of pure mischief at you over their shoulder, and then immediately starts to sprint up the marked path through the woods, Moni easily keeping up.

“Bye, nerds!” you hear them call before they disappear between the trees.

“Stay on the trail!” Namjoon shouts back, sounding as dad-like as you’ve ever heard him, and you can’t help but laugh. The two of you quicken your steps slightly to not fall too far behind, tracking the set of boot and paw-prints they’ve left to mark their trail.

For a moment, it’s silent between you, save the crunching of snow underfoot. It’s nice, being out in nature like this, time spent with Namjoon where you aren’t suffering through Christmas music and ungrateful customers. Where you can just… breathe. It makes you feel a little less sorry for yourself, a little less fixated on your own miserable life.

You glance over at him as that strange seasonal melancholy starts to settle into your bones again. “Are the holidays… better? With a kid?”

Namjoon makes a face, like he’s surprised by the question. “I mean, they’re definitely different. Then again, it’s been a long time since I did the holidays without a kid— not since I was a kid myself. What do you mean by better?”

Self-consciousness washes over you, your gaze drifting down to the path beneath your feet. “I don’t know, there’s just… I can’t shake this weird feeling now that I’m back home. This time of year used to be so exciting for me when I was Sol’s age. Everything felt special. Magical. But now I’m back here, and nothing’s really changed, except me. But I just keep feeling like the magic is gone. It’s… sad.”

He nods, taking a moment before he responds, and he’s chuckling softly to himself when he finally does. “You know, it’s kinda funny. When Sol was younger I actually felt a lot of stress this time of year. I couldn’t really enjoy it, because I was too busy trying to make sure that they had the best holiday I could possibly give them. That they didn’t feel like they were getting any less, since, you know. Their mom and I aren’t together. It’s funny that you bring up the magic, because I put a lot of pressure on myself to make that magic happen. But now that they’re a little older, I don’t know, it’s different.”

“Different how?” you prompt.

A dimple deepens as he hesitates. “It’s gonna sound corny. But really, I realized that the holidays aren’t about the gifts, or the decorations, or every little thing going perfect. You can make yourself sick over that shit, and I did, but kids don’t really care about it.” He pauses, and for a second you think that might be it, but then he keeps going, eyes fixed on the towering pine trees ahead of you.

“The year I opened Indigo, I had sank so much fucking money into it that I was broke. Broke broke. I couldn’t afford a single gift, a tree, not even a turkey. Sol and I sat on the floor of my shitty apartment and ate Chapagetti and watched Friends. And I felt like the biggest fucking failure imaginable. And then you know what happened?”

“What?”

“Sol turned to me, and they said, ‘This is the best Christmas ever, because we get to hang out, just the two of us.’” He blinks a few times, like he’s trying to ward off tears, and his voice comes back slightly less steady than before. “I still don’t know if they said that because they really meant it, or if they could just tell that I needed to hear it. But either way, I thought to myself: how fucking lucky am I, to have such a great kid? Like what did I ever do to deserve them? I still feel that way.”

Namjoon shrugs, as if to shake off the emotion. “I don’t know. Maybe that’s not helpful to you, but. I just see it differently now. It’s not about the what, or the how. It’s about the who. Spending this time of year with the people you care about, and making sure they know you do. That’s the real magic.”

You realize the trail has carried you up the sloping hillside, and is now flattening out at the edge of a clearing, where you can see Moni chasing Sol through the snow, can hear their high-pitched laughter ringing out in the wide-open air.

When you turn back to Namjoon, he’s already looking at you.

“I’m sorry you don’t feel the magic right now. I didn’t either, for a long time. But it does come back, I believe that. It’ll come back for you, too.”

You blink up at him, overwhelmed by his willingness to be so honest, and by the wisdom of his words. “I— thank you,” you finally manage to say.

Namjoon doesn’t answer, just glances up to where Sol and Moni are still playing, and your gaze follows his out over the snow-covered field. Sol is dusting off a sizable stick, and they call out for Moni to fetch before launching it into a dramatic arc, high up in the air.

Moni watches it go, entirely disinterested, then settles onto his haunches in the snow with a yawn.

“You’re so bad at being a dog!” Sol shouts, and that’s enough to make you and Namjoon both dissolve into laughter. They look up at the sound, hands-on-hips, before yelling again, this time in your direction. “My dad said he has a crush on you!”

Your jaw drops open, and Namjoon’s eyes are wide as you’ve ever seen them when you look up at him.

“Damn, dude, you said you were gonna be chill about it!” he exclaims, and you press a hand to your mouth as a fresh wave of giggles overtakes you. Given how long Namjoon’s legs are, it only takes him a few strides to catch up to Sol. You stay a tentative distance behind him, but still close enough to be able to make out their conversation.

“Uncle Hobi says you need to be bolder with women,” Sol chides, matter-of-fact.

“Uncle Hobi says a lot of shit,” Namjoon mutters under his breath.

“He painted my nails,” Sol raises their voice, clearly talking more to you than to their dad, and holds up a hand for you to see, waggling their fingers proudly.

“They look great,” you call out in response.

Namjoon turns back to you as you step in closer, then juts his chin to a bench at the other side of the clearing. “Sit with me for a sec?”

With a nod, you follow him over, and he wipes the metal surface free of snow with his sleeve before gesturing for you to have a seat. For a moment, the two of you sit silently and watch Sol, who is already busying themself with building a snowperson while Moni slow-blinks encouragingly from a distance.

Namjoon’s words chase a heavy sigh. “I’m gonna be real with you, despite the fact that my child just stole my thunder. I like you a lot.”

Your heart swells in your chest, threatening to burst. “I-I like you too,” you stammer back immediately. “Have definitely been harboring my own crush… basically since I started working at Indigo.”

When you turn to look at him, it surprises you a little that he isn’t smiling. You can see a muscle working in his jaw, like he’s nervous.

“That’s the thing,” he finally relents. “Work. I don’t— I hadn’t really planned to tell you how I was feeling, or act on it. Because I’m your boss, and that means, you know. There’s a power dynamic there. And it would be… unethical of me to blur the lines like that, by getting involved with my employee. I wanted you to come out with us today because it was a chance for you and I to be equals, outside of work, but it’s not like that dynamic just goes away, you know? And I feel a little guilty about it now. Because I really like being around you so much, but I just. We can’t. It wouldn’t be right. Not while you’re working for me.”

You stare down at the snow under your boots as you take in his words, and you can’t help it. Try as you might to sit there and take his worries seriously, laughter flutters out of you before you can hold it in.

“What?” Namjoon asks, and you shake your head, trying to compose yourself.

“I really, really appreciate that you gave it so much thought,” you say, willing your voice to stay even. “I mean it.”

“It’s weighed really heavy on me, if I’m honest,” he says solemnly, and you glance over to see him staring into the middle distance, like he’s deep in contemplation.

Before you can stop yourself, you’re reaching out to where his hand rests on the bench between you and covering it with your own.

“Namjoon?” you ask softly, and it seems to snap him out of his trance enough to look back at you.

“Please don’t take this the wrong way,” you preface. “But if I have to choose between you and my stupid seasonal coffee shop job?” The smile starts to flicker over your face again. “Then I quit. I quit right now.”

“Oh thank god,” Namjoon breathes, and you can only make a soft noise of surprise when all at once, he takes your face in his hands and kisses you. You need a split second for the shock to wear off, and then you’re moving your mouth against his, one hand fisting tight in the fabric of his jacket. His lips are full and warm, and it feels like far too soon that he’s pulling back again, his cheeks flushed with color.

“Will you, uh—” he pauses, like he’s remembering how to form a sentence. “Will you still work tomorrow though? Jimin’s back after Christmas, but I really don’t think I can survive a shift on my own.”

“Yeah,” you murmur, still a little breathless from his kiss. “Yeah, I think you’d burn the place down.”

Unable to deny the claim, he laughs brightly as you untangle from each other, then gets to his feet before offering a hand to help you up. “We should head out, it’s gonna get dark soon.”

It’s true: across the wide clearing you can already see the sun threatening to sink back down between the trees, casting a golden-pink light that gleams off the snow and paints the world in warmth.

Sol leads the way back through the woods to the car, tugging Moni along by their leash, while you and Namjoon bring up the rear. You glance over at him a few times to catch him staring, and you scrape your teeth across your bottom lip, unable to keep the smile off your face, unable to stop yourself from mentally replaying the moment when he kissed you, over and over.

Just as you step under the shadow of a large tree, snow-covered branches stretching up toward the clear sky above you, Namjoon stops in the path. It’s so abrupt that you continue a few more paces before you even realize, and then you stop, too, glancing back towards him.

“Hey Sol,” Namjoon calls. “Think you and Moni can make it all the way back to the car in ten seconds?”

“I know what you’re doing,” comes Sol’s cheeky reply, but when Namjoon starts counting backwards from ten, you can hear the crunch of their boots taking off down the path.

“Eight, seven, six…” You watch as Namjoon cranes his neck until he deems Sol far enough out of sight, taking a step toward you as his counting trails off, and you find yourself pulled into him like a magnet. “Come here,” he murmurs, and then his hands are slipping up your waist and guiding you backwards until your back hits the trunk of the tree.

In true Namjoon fashion, he uses way more strength than is necessary for the task, and though your winter jacket cushions you from the impact, you’re smacked against the bark so hard that it knocks a dusting of snow off the branches above you, covering you both in flakes that stick to your hair and eyelashes. The sudden rush of cold makes you gasp into Namjoon’s mouth, but then he’s rolling his tongue over yours and you can’t think about anything else. A heavy pulse has started to thud between your legs at the heat of his breath in your mouth, the way his hips have you pinned to the tree, his body big enough to cover yours entirely.

“Joon,” you find the air to breathe as his lips trail hungrily down the slope of your neck. You rake a hand through his hair, white-blonde strands studded with snow, to try and pull his attention back, despite very much not wanting him to stop. “Joon, we should go. Before someone steals your kid.”

“Yeah,” he murmurs against your skin, and then his mouth is on yours again for one more kiss, like he can’t get enough. “Okay,” he finally grunts as he pulls away, sounding as begrudgingly responsible as you feel. Your head is still spinning; you want nothing more than to stay here and let him kiss you dizzy.

“Let’s go.”

He takes a step back so you can right yourself, reaching out to dust some snow off your jacket, and then the two of you resume walking up the path, sharing a breathless laugh like confidantes. You assume it’s just his standard clumsiness when Namjoon’s hand knocks into yours, but then his fingers are twining through yours purposefully, until you’re pressed palm to palm.

The rush of heat that blooms in your chest at his touch keeps you warm the rest of the way to the car.

Your last shift at Indigo somehow manages to feel exactly like every shift that’s come before it and completely new at the same time.

The work is the same, the steady stream of customers unchanged, the Christmas music still an aggravating soundtrack. But you no longer feel like you have to ignore the butterflies that flutter in your stomach when Namjoon asks you a question, or meets your gaze across the shop.

The only urges you have to suppress are indecent ones, made worse by Namjoon seemingly taking advantage of every opportunity to touch you: hip-checking you when you’re both standing at the front counter, pressing a hand to the small of your back whenever he has to squeeze behind you, leaning in a little closer than necessary to be heard over the noise of the milk steamer. It’s enough to make your breath hitch each time, and you can’t help but wonder if he feels the same relief at not having to hold back anymore.

Towards the end of the night, it surprises you when the typically consistent flow of customers starts to slow down, until it seems to have ceased entirely. You still have two hours to go, but you find yourself staring at the walls, every table empty, having done all the side work you can think of to distract yourself from boredom.

The sound of the front door’s lock clicking shut makes you glance up, only to see Namjoon flipping the open sign over.

“What are you doing?” you ask, blinking dumbfounded, and he looks over his shoulder at you with a shrug.

“It’s Christmas Eve Eve, and I’m the owner, so. We’re closing early. Effective immediately.” The decree makes you laugh a little, and his dimples wink back. “Let’s finish cleaning, I wanna show you something.”

In record time, you find yourself standing outside the front door of Indigo as Namjoon locks up, only tonight your hands are kept warm by the hot chocolates he’d made for the two of you as you closed. He takes his cup back once his hands are free, and you try a tentative sip from yours, now cool enough to drink without burning your mouth. Given what you witnessed of his barista abilities on your first day, you brace yourself for the worst, but your eyes widen in pleasant surprise when the liquid hits your tongue.

“Being a dad means getting really good at a few specific things,” he says by way of explanation as he unlocks his car doors, and you smile as you slip into the passenger seat.

It occurs to you as Namjoon starts to drive that you don’t actually know where he’s taking you, but when you open your mouth to ask at the next red light, he leans over you to fumble open the glovebox and you lose your train of thought. He fishes inside for a few seconds before retrieving a CD case, then makes quick work of prying it open and sliding the disc into the slot on the dash. You attempt to hide your giggle behind the rim of your cup.

“No wonder you like ‘90s music so much. You’re still living there,” you say, nodding to his antiquated stereo, and he smirks as he turns up the volume.

“This is A Tribe Called Quest,” he remarks, quirking an eyebrow when he looks back at you. “You better show some respect.”

“Yes, sir,” you tease in response, and you don’t miss the color that flushes his cheeks.

The light turns green and he accelerates through the intersection, one hand on the steering wheel, the other reaching across the center console to grip playfully at your leg, a few inches above your knee. You can see his tongue pressed to the inside of his cheek, like he’s considering saying something, but when he finally opens his mouth, it’s just to rap along to the music.

It’s only a few songs later that he’s turning off the main road and following a barely-lit gravel path up to a large grassy parking lot, where he pulls into a space and kills the engine. You squint through the windshield, tucking your now-empty drink into the cupholder, but you can’t make out much except dusk and some vague lights over a hill in the distance.

“Was this crush thing just a ploy to murder me?” you quip, and Namjoon looks a little nervous when you glance over, like he took the question to heart. “I’m kidding,” you clarify quickly.

His voice comes out surprisingly soft. “This is one of my favorite things to do during the holidays. Thought it might help with, you know. The magic.”

Something cracks open inside you as you look back at him. “That’s… really sweet.”

“Ah,” he says, as if to dismiss the compliment. “You haven’t seen it yet. Maybe you’ll hate it. Come on.”

The two of you climb out of his car to start your trek to whatever he has in store, heading in the direction of the lights, and Namjoon’s hand slips into yours, like it’s already second nature. Easy and sweet. You grip tight to him, the night air colder now than it was when you left work, but then you finally crest over the hill, and the temperature is suddenly the furthest thing from your mind.

It takes you a moment to even understand what you’re looking at. The place is clearly some kind of arboretum, as the path ahead of you snakes through a perfectly manicured garden of various plants, but the only thing you can focus on are the lights. Every tree, bush, shrub, and other kind of greenery that lines the walkway has been intricately strung up with lights, each one boasting a different hue. The end result is nothing short of dazzling— a veritable rainbow of light and life and color, glittering diamond-bright against the deep-set night around you.

“Namjoon,” you breathe. “This is beautiful.”

There’s a dimple flickering at the corner of his mouth when you look up at him. “Thought you might like it.”

“I can’t believe I never knew this was here,” you remark, your eyes wide and blinking as you try to take it all in.

“Hey,” he answers with a shrug. “Maybe your hometown still has a few good surprises left in it.” You exhale a laugh as you lean into his side and he squeezes your joined hands; you can’t help feeling like you’ve already found the greatest surprise of them all.

After an hour spent wandering through the displays, each one more breathtaking than the last, Namjoon diverts you toward a small food stand. He comes away from the counter with a paper carton filled to the brim with long ropes of twisted, fried dough, warm enough to release steam into the air when you tear one apart to share, and dusted with cinnamon sugar that sticks to your fingertips.

The two of you take a few steps back down the path until you’re under an archway of glowing golden lights, then eventually come to a standstill, too hungry to do anything except devour your food.

Namjoon speaks first, mid-chew. “Can I ask you a question?”

“What’s up?” you answer as you reach for another piece.

He swallows, swiping the back of his hand over his mouth before he continues. “At your interview, you said your life fell apart. What happened?”

“Oh.” You smirk as you rip the braided dough in two, then in two again, before popping it into your mouth. “It seems a little silly now, but. I got fired from that last job, like I told you. And the same day, my roommate pretty much kicked me out of the apartment, because he wanted his boyfriend to move in. He was also my best friend, so. It stung a little. A lot. Moving back in with your parents at this age is humbling, to say the least. Feels a lot like starting over.”

Namjoon hums, like he understands. “I’m sorry about your friend.”

“Eh,” you respond noncommittally. “I should probably be happy for him. The timing just… wasn’t amazing.”

“You know,” he murmurs, thoughtful. “I thought my life was over when my ex and I got pregnant. Not even eighteen and about to be a dad. I really felt like… I don’t know, like that was it for me.” You nod slowly, unable to even fathom what that must’ve been like.

“But, here I am. Still alive.” Namjoon flashes you a grin, and you find yourself smiling back. “Still figuring it out. I actually feel like I’ve learned a lot from watching Sol grow up. They’re like—” He shakes his head, as if at a momentary loss for words. “They’re like a different person every month, I swear. What they’re into, how they dress. Who they wanna be. It makes me feel, I don’t know. Like it’s okay. Like I can change too.” He shrugs. “That’s the thing about life. It’s long. And even when you feel like it’s ended… it keeps going anyway.”

His words wash over you, and you’re so in awe that you can’t help but laugh.

“Ah, sorry.” He grimaces, suddenly self-conscious. “I know that was corny.”

“No, no,” you interject, trying to keep your composure. “I just think you are like, literally the wisest person I’ve ever met.”

The lights glimmering overhead aren’t enough to hide the way Namjoon blushes at the compliment, and then he pauses, as if recalling something. “Didn’t I nearly run the blender with the lid off on your first day?”

You double-over at the memory, and he’s laughing now, too. “Okay, okay. Fair point.”

The thought keeps circling around in your brain as you dust cinnamon sugar from each other’s jackets and continue your way around the rest of the gardens, occasionally pausing to trade sticky-sweet kisses in the twinkling glow: you don’t want the night to end. You keep glancing over at Namjoon, wondering if he’s feeling the same way as he drives you back into town, the heat in his car on full blast, the CD player still underscoring your conversation.

“So, what do your Christmas plans look like?” he asks, eyes flitting briefly from the road to meet your gaze.

You fiddle with a button on your coat, wishing you had a less depressing answer. “I was just gonna spend it by myself. My parents already had a vacation in Hawaii planned, so I’m gonna do what I always do: hole up with booze and snacks and wait for it all to be over.”

He chuckles, tapping his fingertips absentmindedly against the steering wheel. “Well, I have about a hundred presents to wrap tomorrow night while Sol’s at their mom’s. Why don’t you come over and help? I can even provide the booze.” There’s a pause, and his voice comes back softer before you can respond. “You shouldn’t be alone.”

The corner of your mouth tugs up at his sincerity, the way he gently cares for you, has since day one. “Yeah, okay. I mean, you had me at free alcohol.”

Just like that, Namjoon is already turning back into the Indigo parking lot, where your car sits waiting for you. The two of you shrug off your seatbelts once he’s pulled into a space and parked, and he reaches to turn down the music before shifting in his seat to get a better look at you.

“So,” he starts, clearing his throat a little. “You are officially no longer my employee.”

“And you are no longer my boss,” you answer back, and a thrill buzzes in your chest at the statement.

“Which means,” he continues, doing his best to lean over the center console, “I can do this.” He barely finishes getting the words out before his mouth is on yours, your eyes fluttering closed, his kisses far less chaste than the ones you shared earlier. They’re open-mouthed and urgent this time, with Namjoon slipping his tongue into the heat of your mouth like he’s been waiting all night for it.

“Uh-huh,” you murmur between kisses, and then he dips his head lower, until his lips find the join of your neck and shoulder.

“And this,” he purrs before kissing you just as hungrily there, tongue-first. You can’t hold back the soft noise his mouth pulls out of you.

“Fuck,” you breathe as he sucks gently over the same spot, with just enough pressure to make you writhe in your seat. A shiver rolls up your spine when he hums against your skin, clearly pleased at your reaction.

“And, uh…” You slowly blink your eyes open when you feel the warmth of his breath dissipate, and he’s looking at you with his brow furrowed, as if attempting some difficult mental math. “Actually—” He reaches down for the lever to adjust his seat, and it drops all the way back with a graceless thud that makes a laugh flutter out of you. “Maybe you could take your jacket off and come over here?”

You don’t need him to ask you twice, and you’re moving quickly as you peel out of the thick material and scramble across the console to straddle him. You both groan a little when you duck down to press your mouth to his again, all of this suddenly feeling much more real now that you’re basically horizontal. His hands alight on your hips, tentative, like he isn’t quite sure what to do with them, and you smile against his lips.

“Touch me, Joon,” you instruct, and he does as he’s told.

His hands are warm as he slips them beneath the hem of your shirt, trailing over your skin until he reaches the band of your bra. When you hum encouragingly into his mouth, he keeps going, pushing the fabric up your chest so your tits spill free from their confinement. He cups one in each hand, and though you might’ve expected him to be clumsy or rough, given everything you’ve seen of him thus far, you’re surprised to instead find that he’s gentle, thumbs circling your nipples with just the right amount of pressure to tighten them into stiff peaks.

Unable to bite back your whimper at the heat that blossoms through you at his touch, at how much more of him you need, you pull away just enough to break your kiss, glancing up through the back window of his car to confirm the parking lot is still empty.

Namjoon groans low in his throat when you reach down to tug up the hem of your shirt, shifting a little on top of him to give him better access. He doesn’t hesitate, thumb still working at one nipple while he takes the other into his mouth, and your sigh of relief comes edged with a soft moan when he swirls his tongue over the bud of your breast.

“Shit,” you gasp. “Feels so fucking good.”

He pulls off with a wet pop to switch sides, and the slick heat of his mouth sends bolt after bolt of arousal through you until there’s a dull ache of need thudding between your legs. As you roll your hips in desperate search of friction, you can feel him beneath you, straining hard against the fabric of his jeans.

Namjoon pulls his mouth off your breast, letting out a hoarse laugh when you shift to drop your forehead against his collarbone with a groan, horny enough to practically be delirious. “I hate that I’m even saying this,” he rasps, “but I really can’t have sex in a car. I’m too—”

“Big?” you offer, and there’s a smile on his lips as he presses a kiss to your temple.

“I was going to say old.”

You can’t help giggling as you lean up to find his mouth with yours again. Namjoon kisses you a little while longer, lazily, his hands still kneading gently at your tits, until he finally tips his head back, heaving a sigh up to the roof of his car. “Okay, okay. You should go.” His tone is reluctant, like it’s the last thing he wants. “It’s late. And my jeans fucking hurt.”

There’s a self-satisfied smirk toying at your mouth as you sit up, tugging your bra and shirt back into place and not missing the bulge in Namjoon’s pants where your hips meet his. “I will take the blame for that one.”

He folds his hands behind his head, biceps and dimples on full display. “Damn straight.”

You lean down for one more kiss, letting it linger before you make your way back over the center console to retrieve your jacket. “Have a good night, Joon,” you murmur as you reach for the door handle, and when you glance back, his eyes are fixed on you, still heavy-lidded with lust.

“Get home safe. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“I have booze, as promised.” Namjoon’s voice echoes in from the kitchen as you kick off your boots and hang your coat up at his front door come Christmas Eve. The aroma hits your nose as your socked feet pad down the hall to follow him: the spice of cinnamon and clove, paired with a hint of citrus. It smells like the holidays, like home.

“Mulled wine?” you wager a guess, and he nods, turning away from the stove to retrieve two mugs from a cabinet.

“I halved the recipe, since it’s just us,” he explains, mouth pulling down at the corners as he starts to ladle out servings from the pot full of deep red liquid. “Still made a lot, though.”

Your eyes drift across the kitchen until they land on the two empty bottles of red sitting next to the sink, and that makes you pause for a moment to consider. “So the original recipe called for four bottles?”

Namjoon’s brow is furrowed when he glances up, and then he follows your gaze, and a look of delayed understanding washes over him. “Oh, fuck.”

Your elbows dig into the kitchen island as you press your hands to your mouth, as if to physically hold in your laughter. “Did you… halve everything in the recipe except the wine?”

His eyes drop closed as he nods, his answer a resigned sigh. “Yeah. Yes, I did.”

You can’t help yourself: all at once, you’re circling around to join Namjoon behind the stove, so you can take his face in your hands and pull his mouth down to yours. He makes a soft noise of surprise, but then his lips fall into rhythm, kissing you hard enough to knock the air out of your lungs. Even through the fabric of your shirt, his large hands are warm when they slide over the small of your back, and then they keep going, until you finally break the kiss with another laugh when he reaches his final target and outright grabs your ass.

“Not the reaction I anticipated,” Namjoon admits, paired with a teasing squeeze. “But I’ll take it.”

You look up at him through your lashes, pressing your palms flat to the firm plane of his chest. “A very wise friend of mine once told me that the holidays aren’t about every little thing going perfect. I thought maybe you needed a reminder.”

His dimples deepen as his eyes search yours, and his voice is lower in his throat when he responds. “I think that fool was just sayin’ words because a pretty girl asked him a question.”

Heat flushes your face as you smile back. “Well, they were very good words.” You drop your gaze to the pot on the stove. “Come on, I bet we can salvage this.”

Determined to save Christmas, you throw in another handful of spices, chased with a few glugs from a bottle of orange juice Namjoon heroically digs out of the back of the fridge. After a few more minutes of simmering, you take a tentative sip of the mixture to find it perfectly adequate.

“I guess we just have to drink twice as much now,” Namjoon quips, filling up two fresh mugs with the remedied wine. You raise an eyebrow back at him, as if to accept the challenge, while you tap your drinks together in a cheers.

By the time you realize that a double-batch of mulled wine and gift-wrapping don’t exactly go together, it’s already too late. The booze makes Namjoon’s big hands go even clumsier, the few presents he attempts an absolute disaster, and you can’t stop laughing long enough to be of any help. At one point he reaches up to cup your jaw for a kiss, but completely misjudges the distance, deftly knocking into his half-drunk mug and spilling the contents all over a tube of wrapping paper and the crotch of your jeans.

You dissolve into giggles until you can scarcely breathe, scooting your chair a few inches back from the table as he jumps up to grab something to soak up the mess. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” you manage to gasp when he returns, immediately focused on cleaning you up first. You wave him away as you get to your feet. “Seriously, it’s not that bad, it’s mostly the table.”

“Jesus,” Namjoon groans as he drops the kitchen towels in his hands onto the wooden surface, doing his best to soak up the puddle, though there’s no saving the ruined gift-wrap.

“It’s not a big deal,” you murmur as he turns back, once again examining the extent of the damage done to your clothes. A shiver rolls through you as his thumb brushes over the waistband of your jeans, and he grimaces a little.

“This is probably gonna stain.”

“I mean…” Your pulse starts to quicken as his fingertips linger where they are, and Namjoon’s gaze flits up to meet yours when you speak, clearly hearing a shift in your tone of voice. “I could just… take them off.”

A smile teases at the corner of your mouth when his eyes widen. “Yeah,” he breathes, then seems to self-correct. “I mean, uh. If-if that’s something you would feel comfortable doing.”

You’re already reaching to undo the button, and then Namjoon takes over to tug open the zipper and push the fabric down your legs, and your nipples tighten beneath your bra at the reminder of how gentle his large hands can be. His lips find yours again and you don’t hesitate to lick into his mouth, jostling slightly as you try to make out with him and kick your pants the rest of the way off at the same time. It’s graceless, but you manage to make it work, and then he pulls away from you to glance back down.

“It looks like a little got on your shirt, too.”

He’s right, you realize: there are faint purple marks splattered just above the hem of your long-sleeve, and you smirk as you look up at him.

“If I didn’t know you better, I’d think you did this on purpose,” you tease, and then in one swift move you pull your shirt over your head, letting it drop to the kitchen floor next to your discarded jeans.

Namjoon’s hands are instantly on your bare skin, trailing heat as they trace the curve from your hip to your waist, and your breath hitches as he ducks down to brush his lips over your collarbone. The low tone of his voice reverberates through you when he speaks against your skin. “I like to think I could’ve gotten you naked tonight even without being an accident-prone idiot.”

You run a hand along the line of his jaw, tipping his head up to seek a kiss, before leaning back to murmur, “I guess we’ll never know.”

He kisses you again, and the two of you stumble across the threshold into the living room, pausing along the way to peel off his sweater and then his jeans, laughing into each other’s mouths, just drunk enough to lack any semblance of coordination you might have otherwise had.

When you drop down to lay back on his sofa, you’re both stripped to your underwear, and you can feel the thick bulge of him, pressing firm-heavy heat into your thigh as he settles his hips between your spread legs.

Namjoon’s eyes roam over your body beneath him, and then he’s tugging the lace of your panties to the side to slip a finger into your drenched center, beckoning it up to rub you just right. Your mouth drops open as he traces slow circles against your front wall, and when he adds a second digit, you can’t help but whimper softly at the stretch. It thrums through you like your lingering red wine buzz, hot and thick and good enough to get lost in, your head dropping back on the couch cushions as your hips rock up into his touch.

“Goddamn,” Namjoon groans, and your eyes flutter open again to take him in, his gaze heavy-lidded as he watches his fingers disappear up into you, coaxing slick sounds out with each pump of his hand. “I had a whole plan,” he rasps. “To take my time. But, fuck, I really want to fuck you.”

“It’s okay, Joon,” you breathe, not sure how much longer you could stand the torturous feeling of his clothed cock grinding into your thigh, so close to where you want him. An ache throbs in your cunt, needy, plugged up with two fingers but still begging for more. “Just fuck me.”

Realization flashes over his face, and then he suddenly heaves a sigh, looking defeated. You have to bite back a noise at the loss as he withdraws his fingers. “I— there’s an obvious joke here, but. I don’t have any condoms. Or if I do, they’re definitely expired.”

It takes you a second to process the revelation, and then you reach up to pull him down to you, smiling when he hums surprise into your mouth at the unexpected response. Your lips linger on his, and then you tip your head to press a kiss to the slope of his neck, not quite able to maintain eye contact as you murmur, “I mean. I’m on the pill, and I’m clean. So.”

“Yeah?” he replies, and your nose bumps against his shoulder as you nod. “Me too. Well, I-I’m clean, I mean. I’m not on the pill.”

You can’t help the giggle that slips out as you look up at him. “Right, no, I get it.”

“Sorry,” Namjoon huffs a laugh in return, his face flushing a little. “I talk a lot, when I’m nervous.”

“I just thought it was an all-the-time thing,” you admit, and the color in his cheeks deepens.

“I’m just always nervous around you.”

Your mouth seeks his out for a kiss sweeter than the last, slower for his shy honesty and the hummingbird thrum of your heartbeat behind your ribs. The heat of his breath ghosts over your lips when you tip back to answer, “You don’t have to be.”

“So, you’re okay?” he asks, almost reverent with his question. “If we—if I don’t—”

“Please,” you insist, and it’s all the encouragement he needs.

With remarkably little fumbling, he drags the lace of your panties down your legs, letting you kick them the rest of the way off while he moves up to unclasp your bra. You slip the straps off your shoulders and drop it over the edge of the couch, then watch as he shifts to strip out of his boxers, freeing his cock with enough force that it smacks against his abdomen with a hefty thud.

You swallow hard as you take him in: long and thick, flushed dark. Big, and fuck, you want all of him; you can feel how drenched you already are between your legs at the thought of all that cock filling you up.

When you tear your gaze away to meet his, Namjoon is staring at you just as hungrily, and he brings a hand to pump himself a few times, to coat his shaft in the wetness that’s started to drool from the head of his dick.

“Come here,” he grunts, his voice rough-edged, and you waste no time straddling yourself over his hips.

Given his considerable size, you figured it might take you a second to adjust, but you want him so bad, the feeling of his cock stretching you open is all white-hot pleasure. Your fingertips dig into his shoulders as you slowly lower yourself down on him, inch by overwhelming inch, until your ass is flush with thighs.

Namjoon’s head drops back against the couch as you slowly grind your hips into him, his hands gripping at your waist to guide the movement. You can’t help the soft sound that flutters out of you: he just looks so good like this, white-blonde hair swept off his forehead, beads of sweat trailing down his temples and glistening at his collarbones, his parted lips full and kiss-bitten.

“Baby,” he groans as you start to move a little more intentionally. “Fuck, I’m not gonna last long. Tell me what to do.”

“Touch me,” you breathe, and you close a hand over one of his, guiding him down to your clit.

Just like the night before in his car, his touch is so gentle when he begins to trace circles into the sensitive nub with his thumb. You can feel the slow-hum build of an orgasm in your core, drawn up by the steady rub of his hand, and you lean back to allow him better access, bracing yourself on his thighs as you rock along his length.

A moan rips through you as the new angle drags the head of his dick just right against your front wall, and it’s good enough to make your eyes roll back. Chasing the feeling, you shove your hips down harder, driving his cock into that spot over and over until your thighs have started to tremble.

“That’s it,” Namjoon grunts encouragingly, his voice husky. “Use me, baby. Look so good when you bounce on my cock like that.”

The words set every last one of your nerve endings alight, and you dig your nails into his skin as your spine arches from the pleasure. His thumb is still working steadily at your clit, and the heavy stretch of his cock has you so wet, you can feel arousal starting to leak down your thighs. Your pussy clings to him like a vice, a throbbing-tight heat, taking him to the hilt every time.

“Oh my god, Joon,” you groan, “I’m gonna come.”

His touch doesn’t let up, and you can feel yourself teetering right on the precipice of it, only able to manage little gasps as you drop yourself down onto his cock again and again and again, with enough force that there’s an audible sound of your skin slapping against his.

Your legs are outright shaking from the effort now, from how close you are, and then Namjoon ducks his head, using his free hand to guide your tit into his mouth. The swirl of his tongue laved across the tight bud of your nipple is just what you need to push you over the edge.

With a moan that’s more like a sob, you drop forward against Namjoon’s chest, sinking all the way down to bury him in your pulsing cunt as you come. He continues to rub you through the waves of your orgasm, breathing ragged in your ear while your pussy gushes around him, until you grab his wrist with a soft whimper of overstimulation, and he relents.

Too gone to get any words out, all you can do is take his face in your hands and kiss him. He rolls his tongue over yours, decadent, as his palms slip down to cup your ass. You groan a little into his mouth when he begins to shift you, your cunt still fluttering-sensitive at every little motion, but he manages to maneuver you onto your back while still keeping himself sheathed in you.

His hands move to your thighs, encouraging your legs to hook over his hips, and his mouth trails kisses down the valley between your breasts before he breathes against your skin, “Can I keep going?”

“Please,” you murmur, and it’s chased with a moan when he starts to rock his hips into you. You feel so full, so swollen from your climax that it’s like your walls were molded to take him, the crown of his cock stroking deep-deep over the place that lights you up inside, shooting sparks of pleasure all the way down to your toes.

Namjoon’s breath stutters on a laugh. “Shit, I’m already close.”

You tilt up to brush your lips against his, humming encouragingly into his mouth, and then he pulls back again, one dimple teasing at the corner of his smile. “God, I— wanna hear you say it.”

Somehow, you know exactly what he means. “Come in me, Joon,” you beg, fucked so good that you’re shameless for it, and you gasp when he bottoms out in you with his next thrust. “Fill me up. Fuck me full of your cum, baby, please.”

It’s like the words send him into overdrive, and he practically growls as he starts to fuck his cock into you forcefully, hard enough to make your tits bounce. Each snap of his hips punches a heady groan from your lungs, and you reach up to drag your nails across the skin of his back as he chases his own end.

“Gonna fucking— give it to you,” he hisses, rolling his hips one, two, three more times, and then you feel his cock twitching, shoved in as deep as you can take him. He heaves a final strangled groan as he comes, rope after rope of his release pumping into you to paint your walls, until you can feel it beginning to spill back down your thighs.

You kiss through the comedown, inhaling shaky breaths into each other’s mouths, your bodies still fitted together like puzzle pieces, sweat starting to cool in the places where skin is pressed to skin. Namjoon finally moves first, giving a grunt of effort as he rolls off the couch, and you throw an arm over your face while the world slowly settles into focus around you.

When he returns, it’s with a towel in hand, and you can’t help smiling as he cleans you up, trailing soft kisses along your collarbone in tandem.

His voice is soft, too, when he finally speaks. “Will you stay here tonight?”

You prop yourself up on your forearms to look at him, and a little glimmer of something lights up in your chest that you can’t ignore. The first spark of an ember, just enough to reignite a flame you’d long since believed to be entirely extinguished. But now he’s shown you: it doesn’t have to be. You don’t have to be alone.

“Of course. We still have presents to wrap,” you say simply, and he huffs a laugh as he leans in to press a kiss to your forehead.

“Joon?” you murmur into the crook of his neck, unable to keep your voice entirely steady.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you,” you breathe. “For the magic.”

#namjoon smut #namjoon x reader #namjoon x y/n #bts smut #bts x reader #a hyung holiday

1K notes · View notes

nctsplug02 · 1 year

Note

horny dad jaehyun

hands off || jeong.j

genre: fluff and smut

warnings: creampie, horny dad!jaehyun, clit play, dirty talking, sexual touching, groping (ass and tits), nipple kink (sucking and pinching), unprotected sex missionary and riding.

pairing: horny dilf!jaehyun x milf!reader,, extras: dreamies (no mark, sorry!), jaemin as the son and sungchan as the baby brother!

6K post! thank you, loves! i love you all so so much! i am very grateful for you all. thank you for the love and support! 💗

“mom! dad! i’m home from school! and i brought some friends!” jaemin shouts and tucks his keys away into his backpack.

“welcome home, hon. hi, boys.” you greet the group of teens. “you boys hungry?” you adjust the child on your right hip. “ah, we just had tteokbokki, ma.” jaemin throws a frown towards you. “oh, that’s okay. just let me know if you boys are hungry or bored.”

they all nod before running off to jaemins room.

you turn when hearing heavy breathing. “hey, babe. did you fix rubies sink?” rubie is the seventy-six year old neighbor who lived alone and behind your house. “yep— she tried paying me again, but i declined it.” he yanks his shirt off and uses it to wipe his sweat.

“such a sweet old lady.” you walk up to him and you lift yourself on your tiptoes while pressing your lips onto his.

“is jaemin home now?” you nod, adjusting the boy on your hip again. “he is— and he brought some of his friends. i totally forgot that he’d asked me last week if he could have some friends over to spend the night. i mean, i didn’t even get food and snacks and drinks— oh, my.” you sigh dramatically and jaehyun chuckles. “i can run to the store and get some things for them. board games, snacks, juice, movies, dinner?”

you grin in relief. “i’m so thankful to have you.” you press your hand on his chest before leaning up and pressing your lips onto his again. “and i’m very thankful to have you.” he stares at your lips as you pull away.

the boy on your hip starts to fuss as jaehyun pats your hips. “ooohh’m, you getting mad?” you push your lips out at the boy who starts to whine. “you hungry? mm’okay, let’s get some nummy food.” your husband stares down at you with the toothy and goofiest grin.

“hi, sweet boy. did you just wake up from your nap?” jaehyun asks— after all, the child cried for hours because of a small fever. “what a cutie.” jaehyun lightly pinches the boys cheek.

you frown as the boy starts to whine. “awww, is daddy being mean? say, no daddy. be nice.” you mimic a baby voice and jaehyun laughs.

“alright, i’ll go get the stuff and you’ll feed sungchan?” you nod and jaehyun plants a kiss on your forehead. “okay, i’ll be back in an hour or so.” he says checking his watch. “‘kay, love you.” you lean forward. “love you more.” he presses his lips onto yours before he swipe his phone, keys and wallet off the kitchen counter and leave.

it was 8PM and dinner was finished.

“jaemin, sweetheart, do you mind doing the dishes before you go play games with dad and your friends?” jaemin nods, quickly finishing his bowl before coming over to you. “thanks, hon.” you side-hug him and press a kiss on his temple.

“mrs jeong, may i know how you made this dish? i want to make it for my mom one day.” haechan asks and you grin.

you were gonna get into this. “i diced some garlic into small pieces and let it simmer in some oil. then i added some meat and let it cook for a bit until adding some oyster sauce and some chili powder. then i added some buk-choi after the meat was cooked.”

the group of boys hum. “did you guys—? oohh, no! channie!” you gasp when seeing channie covered in baby food.

you make your way to the boy who giggles. “he looks like an actual sandman character!” jeno points out making sungchan giggle even more. “is that’s funny, channie?” you ask the boy who tosses his arms up.

“now, we definitely have to give you a bath tonight.” you sigh, undoing the tray from his high-chair and unbuckling him out. “okay, well you boys do what you want— i’m gonna go give this little boy a bath.” you tickle his belly making him giggle.

they watch as you leave upstairs. “what a milf.” haechan makes a comment and earns a smack to his head from jaemin who returns from the kitchen. “i’m sorry.” he hangs his head low and quickly apologizes. “don’t make those comments about my mom.” jaemin grits his teeth and curls his lip.

“alright boys,” jaehyun comes into the dining room and claps his hands together. “you boys ready to play some games? i set it all up.” they quickly cheer and hop out of their seats.

“is everyone comfortable?” you ask after the movie is finished. “yes!” they all answer and you grin.

it was 11PM and they’d just finish playing games, meanwhile you had to put sungchan to bed before wishing the boys a goodnight.

“goodnight, kiddos. sweet dreams and, don’t let the bedbugs bite. tomorrow we’ll get up early and i’ll make some delicious breakfast for us before we head out and mess around.” you shut the light off and they all wish you a goodnight as you shut the door.

you sigh as you make your way to your bedroom. “hi, baby.” jaehyun was yanking off his shirt when he greets you. “hi, hon.” you tiredly grin, swiping your shirt off and grab the shirt he had just took off.

“ah,” his head turns to you. “baby, that’s dir—?” he pauses and clears his throat. “your.. you aren’t wearing a bra.” you toss the shirt over your head. “yeah, i didn’t feel like wearing one today.” you fix the shirt.

you look up to see your husband flushed.

after being married for years, he’d always get shy when seeing you naked.

“uhm,” he clears his throat. “i’ve been wearing that shirt all day, im sure it’s dirty. how about we get you a clean one of mine from the closet—?” you press your lips together. “mm, i guess you have a point.”

he gulps as you swipe the shirt off again. “or.. or you don’t have to wear a shirt to bed, tonight?” a smile grows on your lips. “i guess we could also do that.” he gets giddy as you toss the shirt.

“i feel.. so exposed?” you laugh and cover yourself. “what? no, no. you look so beautiful.” he takes a step closer and cups your breast from underneath.

with puppy eyes, he looks at you. “may i?” you knew what he wanted, so you nodded.

he picked you up and places you on the dresser under the TV. his mouth is then attached to you nipple after you had wrapped your arms around his neck.

he groans in satisfaction.

you tasted like sweet honey.

you run your fingers through his semi-wet hair. taking a fistful of it from the scalp. you chew on your bottom lip, not wanting to be loud as you moan quietly.

he tongue swirls around your hard nipple and sucks. he bites down making you gasp a bit. “mr jeong,” you say in a teasing tone. he groans around your nipple, again and lifts you off the dresser.

he lays you down on the bed and climbs on top of you. “my pretty lady.” he whispers, swiping your nipple with his thumb. “such a pretty.. pretty lady.” he undoes his sweats and hisses when grazing his rock-hard cock.

“feel what you do to me, baby.” he brings your hand down and allows you to fist his cock. “oh, baby.” he groans, hiding his face into your neck.

you lift his head and look down at his plumped lips. “you’re so loud, baby. do you want to wake up the boys?” jaehyun groans and brings his red face back into the crook of your neck. you grab his hand and push aside your panties, placing his hand on your core.

“fuck, you’re so wet.” jaehyun sighs and slips in two fingers making you arch your back off the bed. “and only for you.” you whisper and jaehyun flips the two of you over.

“ride me, baby.” jaehyun says, his pink cock sitting against his abdomen while your pussy drips.

you stand his cock up and sink yourself down on his cock. long extended groans leaving jaehyun and your throats.

“fuck.” jaehyun squeezes your waist and slowly pushes up. “slow.” you say, hands around his wrists. “whatever you want, baby.” jaehyun guides your hips back and forth.

your clit rubbing against his base as you moan under your breath.

you sigh and lower your upper half down, pressing your breasts firmly against jaehyuns chest. “how does it feel, baby?”

like your head weighted 300 pounds.

“feels.. so amazing.” jaehyun holds your hips still and pushes up his hips. “sit still and let me hear how pretty you sound.” jaehyun grunts and slides his hand down your ass cheek.

your moans and whimpers growing louder and louder by each second. “j—jae, i—i’m gonna cum.” you gasp and arch your chest against jaehyuns. “go ahead, baby. cum for me.”

jaehyun fucks you through your orgasm. “ah—!” jaehyun winces at your teeth digging into his shoulder. “fuck, baby.” jaehyun groans and plows harder. his balls flying up and smacking against your ass.

“b—babe!” jaehyun covers your mouth when you accidentally scream too loud. but, you could care less. your g-spot was busy being assaulted by his tip. “and, i—im the loud one?” jaehyun laughs.

after several more minutes, jaehyun releases his load with a groan. his teeth attacking your flesh while his cum dribbles past your lips.

jaehyun flips the two of you over and pushes himself up, his cock slowly drawing out. “round two?” you ask and jaehyun smirks. “of course, baby.” you groan and jaehyun laughs.

“i’ll do the work, momma.” jaehyun holds your legs up and hangs them over his shoulders.

“oh, my god.” you gasp and place your hand on jaehyuns hip when he pushes in. “shh, lets not wake up the boys and ruin mommy and daddy time.” jaehyun spanks your ass.

you grab the pillow and cover your face, muffling your screams and moans. “you’re so cute when you do that.” jaehyun rubs the stinging area where jaehyun had smacked just a few seconds ago.

“your pussy feels so good, baby.” jaehyun places his thumb on your clit and your hips stutter. “s—stop!” you hold his hand but he grabs your hand and pushes it away.

you clench around him and jaehyun lands another smack on your ass. “don’t tease me like that, baby.”

you and jaehyun went, again for several more rounds.

“did anyone hear what happened last night?” jeno asks when everyone else wakes up. “what happened?” haechan asks. “did sungchan wake up and cry all night?” jaemin asks and jeno shakes his head.

“your parents were having sex all night.” jaemin groans and covers his ears.

they all flinch when they door swings open. “oh, good. you boys are awake.” you grin at the boys. “i was just going to make breakfast. it’ll be ready in a few minutes.” you slowly close the door.

“milf.” haechan says and covers his head this time.

A/N: this was so shit.

#anon #nct smut #nct imagines #nct scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop smut #kpop fluff #nct 127 #ash talks #nctsplug02 #jung jaehyun imagines #nct jaehyun #jeong jaehyun fluff #jaehyun fluff #jaehyun angst #jaehyun smut #nct dilf #nct dad au #jaemin fluff

1K notes · View notes

postersofleon · 4 months

Text

notes: i'm publishing my other stuff from my other account :p sorry if you already saw this. I didn't want to do it but here we are. it has smut so no minors

vendetta leon is a bit frustrated with the way his life turned into. he completely falls to the deep end and turns into a sugar daddy, though leon doesn't like being one. he wants someone to date him for being him, but he feels he is out of his prime. in his opinion, he was in his prime at twenty-seven but because he spent so many years working. he feels he is done for.

he then sees you. he feels like doesn't have a proper chance with you so he begins with small things. you two aren't dating, but he attempts to talk to you. he feels like a creep talking to you, but he tries so hard to talk. even though the poor bastard is wasting his poor liver, he is always sober around you. you begin to notice how he slowly stopped smelling like alcohol, how he smiles as he speaks to you.

he had needed this. he hasn't been able to talk to someone that didn't have to do with work. his stupid sugar daddy mindset comes through and buys you small gifts. he doesn't necessarily think he is unlovable, just hard to love; leon thinks buying gifts is the only way to get love. he has a bunch of it thanks to his job wasting his time.

the gifts are small. books, earrings - anything that you mentioned you liked. he feels pathetic, but when he sees your eyes shine, he smiles back.

then, when things were getting serious: he stupidity asked if he could be your sugar daddy. you thought he was going to ask you to date him. least to say, it was uncomfortable for both of you when you said no. leon wasn't angry for you saying no. he was ashamed. of course, sugar daddies are weird even in his lifestyle. though, you said you like to date him.

when dating this vendetta leon, leon is always commenting how old he is. he doesn't like the daddy kink. he feels like a creep. he shows you pictures in his youth: "this was me." he shows an ID of him before raccoon city and him during re4. you can tell he is proud. he doesn't necessarily have a dad bod, but he didn't work out like he used to. he is a bit soft around his arms, thighs, and stomach. a small defined abs appears every once in a while. you comment how handsome he is, and he laughs, "you should've seen when i was twenty-seven."

leon needs praise. constantly praise. he needs to pick up that poor ego that died a couple of years back. you see how he slowly starts be funny, they aren't dad jokes just one punch lines. he seems more relaxed that you two are dating. even his friends are commencing how he looks a bit better.

you love his stubble, he blushes, and he is embarrassed to do that. he feels young again. he feels... happy

leon doesn't necessarily have a breeding kink, but the idea of you being pregnant makes him happy. in his mind, he needs to hurry up and make babies, but you don't want kids or can't have kids he doesn't mind it.

nsfw

at first, sex was him constantly worried of you changing your mind on him. he wanted to fuck you hard so you won't forget him. he sucks ass sex talk, so he just shuts up and continues to fuck you.

but with the constant praise you gave him, the fucking turned into love making. he is whiny and tired, he wants to make you happy, but sex is a duo. he loves how you love his softness. he has a couple of stretch marks on his arms and a bit on happy trail.

he is always cursing on how you would've loved his old body, but you praise him every single time. he feel selfish when you give him blowjobs, he is pets your face, and a bit of his sexual frustrations comes out. he moves his hips a bit and makes you choke. leon groans weakly and says a weak apology. he is happy he stopped drinking

#resident evil #leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #vendetta leon

255 notes · View notes

essentiallyleaf · 6 months

Text

day 22. daddy kink. with. sakura.

758 words.

tags.

kinktober ‘23, futa!idol x female reader, daddy kink, cockhungry reader, somewhat rough sex, i’m not feeling very funny tonight.

notes.

they just keep getting shorter! i swear it’s not because i’m procrastinating writing until 12 a.m. though. exhaustedly, leaf.

You met the girl in a mall, she was reading Kafka with the most peaceful, relaxed air, like there was a desert around her, when in reality it was so crowded and loud that you couldn’t hear your friend talk to you from across the table at the coffee shop. She later told you she likes to hear the sound of the artificial waterfall beside the escalator while she reads; you told her, go to the river; she told you, it’s not the same, people go to the river to relax, I don’t read to relax; you asked her, what do you read for?; she answered you, I read to understand what the writer is like in bed. Anyway, you went up to her and asked whether she knew if there was a library in the mall - you knew there was one right around the corner, but pick-up lines aren’t your forte; whose forte are they, if truth be told? - and if she had a book to recommend. “Well, it depends, what do you like?” It’s very easy to make conversation, if you think about it: you can start anywhere you want, and it’s like tributary streams, at some point you always end up channeling into your common interests.

It’s just following the course of the river that leads to her writing down her number on the paper towel you’d gotten with your coffee - “It’s Sakura, by the way, but you can call me Kkura,” she said with a warm smile, like she loved her name, like she had chosen it herself - to the two of you meeting again (neither of you used the word date, but in retrospect, well, yeah) in a bar downtown. They didn’t call themselves a gay bar, but the place had queer written all over it; I mean, Monthly Murder Mystery Monday? Really? To the two of you seeing each other four times in the next week, to her asking if you wanted to come to her house to have a drink after the fourth, cause she wanted to show you her wild animal plushie collection. One thing that surely was wild was the sex, that night. Kkura was plunging into your pussy from the back as you were bent over her bed, ass in the air, and she felt huge inside you. Your face was sunk into the soft light gray-brown fur of the sloth when it escaped your mouth.

“Ngh- ahaadhd- …addy!”

“What did you just say?”

“I- Nothing, I’msor-”

“Again.”

The thing about a river’s delta is, it splits very gradually, just one extra fork at a time, so you don’t really notice how wide it has spread until you’re already deep into it. You start calling her daddy every time you’re hungry for her cock, and she feeds you (the unholy sound of your slurps fills the room like there’s three girls sucking it at the same time, but no, it’s just little old you), then every time you’re hungry. She’s the sweetest girlfriend, you know she’d always get you whatever you’re craving if you asked nicely. You call her daddy when it’s just the two of you, then if there’s close friends around. They still smile jokingly when it happens, but they understand, they know what it’s like; not to be with a girl whose rod that can rearrange your insides, but to be lucky enough to be next to someone that you love and to not be afraid to show it. You almost have a slip up the first time you meet her parents: “Dad- Da… Dadaism was, pretty… wacky, wasn’t it? Duchamp, what an eccentric soul, haha!” Even the save is embarrassing, but it’ll be a great story to tell your kids; ok, maybe not your kids, maybe your friends.

She’s your daddy when you sit on her lap and start grinding on it while she’s having breakfast, when you lay your head on her shoulder and she gropes your tits, only covered by a thin beige t-shirt, while you’re watching Worlds, when she fucks you missionary and slaps your thighs until they become red like your cheeks at her parents’ house, and her fingers gently wrap around your throat, and she kisses you like her throat is burning and only you can help relieve it. You can’t separate freshwater and salt, once you’re out in the sea. It’s all mixed together, as one. And it’s not good or bad, it’s all just part of a natural cycle. Sakura, Kkura, daddy; any name, any place, any time.

footnotes.

my favorite shirt from Raygun is the one that says ‘Iowa: flee to flourish’. friedly, leaf.

#kinktober #kinktober 2023 #girl group smut #idol smut #female idol smut #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #idol x reader #idol x female reader #le sserafim #sakura #miyawaki sakura #le sserafim sakura #le sserafim smut #sakura smut #miyawaki sakura smut #le sserafim sakura smut

324 notes · View notes

tomssexdoll · 2 days

Note

Tom being reader’s neighbor smut like he goes through her window into her room while she is listening to music and he scares her a little cause she didn’t paid attention (don’t ask me why i just find it funny) and she gets a little mad and starts yapping about what would happen if her parents found out cause they are strict and don’t really like him and he shuts her up with kiss and stuff and it ends with smut tyyyy if you will do it you’re my favourite writer i love your fics🫶🏻❤️

awww tysm for saying that ur actually so sweet ilysm <3

Shut up and kiss me

PAIRINGS: Tom 2007 x Female reader CONTENT: FLUFF + SMUT SYPNOSIS: Y/N and Tom are neighbours, he has had a crush on her for years and finally decides to talk to her, but in a strange way. He climbs into her window and surprises her, startling her a little. A/N: hi WARNINGS: teasing and clothing action, kissing, dom!tom, sub!reader, p in v (missionary)

I was listening to my music, organising my room a little bit. It had been messy for weeks due to me being super lazy and studying a bunch.

I turned around and screamed, my neighbour suddenly standing right behind me, I ripped my headphones off "what the fuck? Tom what are you doing here?" I grunted.

He smirked, "I was bored so I just wanted to come say hi", "you couldn't even ask?" I rubbed my temples in frustration. "Nope! What are you doing?" he chuckled, roaming around my room.

"I was just organizing my room, until you came in" I rolled my eyes, sitting on my bed. "Do you not know how much trouble I could get in? My parents already don't like you" his eyes widened, "don't like me? WHY?" he whined, sitting next to me.

"Because you drink and smoke, they see you do it all the time" he scoffed "whatever.." "anyways..I could literally be grounded for a month with them seeing you in here! My parents are so strict, my dad would kill you with his bare hands if he saw a guy, let alone YOU were in my bedroom" I yelled, "you're so lucky they aren't home!" I kept on ranting on about it, noticing how Tom just stared at me and smirked.

I felt his hands wrap around my neck and him smashing his lips into mine, my eyes widened, trying to process what just happened. He pulled away and chuckled, "oops, might have broken you" once I was out of my state of shock my eyes softened, pulling him in for another kiss, deepening it.

His hand snaked down to my waist, pulling me closer and caressing me softly. "So beautiful, yet so stubborn.." he smirked, whispering on my lips.

I reached my hand down, palming his cock softly. He let out a low groan, "fuck..don't tease baby.." he gripped my waist tighter, grinding himself onto my hand and slipping his tongue into my mouth.

I smirked and climbed on his lap, continuing to kiss him, our tongues fighting for dominance. His hands slowly moved down to my ass, cupping the cheeks tightly, grinding me softly on his cock.

"Cmon..let me fuck you pretty girl.." he whispered in my ear, pushing me back onto the bed. I bit my lip, he slowly climbed in bedween my legs, his erection pressing against my leg as he pressed his lips against my neck, sucking softly.

I grabbed his belt, pulling it off and dragging his pants down, his light grey boxers stained with pre cum. I smirked and pulled his cock out, taking my pyjama pants and panties off in one go.

"Holy fuck.." he groaned, pulling my hips closer, his tip resting against my entrance. "You sure you're ok with this baby? I nodded, smiling.

He smirked and slowly pushed his length into me, "fuckkk.." he groaned, throwing his head back. He stretched me out, his cock fitting my pussy perfectly.

He started to create a pace, softly slamming his hips into mine, cock dissapearing in me repeatedly. I moaned softly as his tip hit my g spot, "oh tom!" I groaned, holding onto his dreads and tugging them softly.

The pleasure came in fierce waves, crashing into me at ungodly speeds. The way he held me, the way he looked at me, the way he fucked me made me so much more attracted to him. I'd always liked Tom, he was tall, rebelious, had dreadlocks and his style was amazing.

I'd always catch him staring at me as I walked by his house, even if it was through the window.

He continued to pound his cock into me, ramming into me so hard tears started to stream down my cheeks, whimpers blurting out every time he hit my sweet spot.

"Cum for me schatz.." he mumbled, leaning down and kissing my lips, his sweet tongue forcing itself in my mouth, slobbering all over each other.

I felt tension build up in my tummy, nothing I've ever felt before. I whined and held onto him, the tension building up quickly and my heat burning.

"Mmmpfuck!" I cried out, my legs twitching as my orgasmed crashed down, cumming all over his length. "Ohh shit!" he also cried out, shooting his load in me, still thrusting as his cum was fucked deep into me.

"Oh fuck..that was amazing.." he sighed, collapsing on me and panting, both of us trying to catch our breaths. After relaxing for a bit he pulled out, our juices spilling out of my cunt.

He smirked and got a tissue, cleaning me up and kissing my forehead, laying back with me.

"I've liked you for years, ever since you moved in and I first saw you I was literally starstruck, you are so kind and beautiful, please consider being my girlfriend anytime" he chuckled, I smiled "of course" as I got up to get dressed I heard a car pull up in the driveway.

My eyes widened, "fuck my parents are home!" Tom shot up and put his clothes on, "quick give me your number!" he chucked his phone at me, my shaky fingers typed at the keyboard, saving his number.

He winked at me one last time and jumped out of the window, running back to his house, his pants nearly falling down. I laughed and snapped a picture, sending it to him.

tags: @itsmealaiah @tomkaulitzloverr @tomscumdump @tomscumdoll @estxkios @ge-billsgf @charliesgoodboy @syylss @ballhair

68 notes · View notes

m-jelly · 6 months

Note

Hello Jelly 💗 can I request dad Levi with their baby asking for a puppy because initially they wanted a sibling but both Levi and y/n was unable to give it right away so they adopt a dog and then unexpected happen, y/n is pregnant.

My English sucks because it is not my first language

@ladycheesington <3

A puppy and a baby

Levi x fem!reader

Modern AU, married, dad Levi, fluff, romance, pregnancy, being parents, getting a puppy.

Your daughter wants to be a big sister. Levi and you want another baby too, but it takes time. So, you get a cute puppy and all things are going perfectly. You get curious, take a test and find out you're pregnant as well.

@ladycheesington @levisbrat25 @nyxiieluna @li-anne @galactict3a @youre-ackermine @thebobaprincess @2moth-anon2 @cypidity @notgoodforlife @demonsimp6 @nbinairyn

You smiled at Lilly as she sat on your lap with her book. You read it to her as she read along and learned new words. You did a funny voice making her squeal with laughter and clap her little hands. Your daughter brought so much joy to your and Levi's lives.

Lilly looked up as the door opened and closed. "Daddy!"

Levi chuckled. "Wait there! I have a gift!"

You knew very well Levi was taking his shoes off and then slipping his slippers on to keep his house clean. You hugged Lilly and felt excited to see your husband. "A fun gift, huh? It's exciting."

Levi walked into the living room with his jacket looking bigger than normal. "I think you're gonna like it." He zipped down a bit causing a dog to pop its head out. "Ta da!"

Lilly gasped. "Puppy!"

Levi put the puppy down on its paws. "You can name him anything you want."

"Cupcake!"

He let out a long sigh. "Cupcake?"

She giggled. "I joke!"

He knelt and hugged his daughter. "You little rascal. So, what do you want to call him?"

She slipped off your lap and petted the dog. "Mm...Hades!"

"Great name. I'll get a nametag for him."

She ran around with Hades and giggled. "Good boy!"

Levi sat next to you and sighed. "He's a cute dog, huh? Don't worry, I will train him and Mike will help too, seeing as he is a dog trainer."

You hugged his arm and kissed his cheek a few times. "Perfect. He'll be a very good boy." You smiled at Levi. "Speaking of good boys."

Levi smiled at you. "You know I love it when you call me that."

You kissed him and hummed against his lips. "I love you."

"I love you too."

You slapped his thigh making him buck. "Now, my handsome hubby, I need you to look after the two darlings so I can go pee tinkle."

He winked at you. "Sure. Hurry back, I wanna kiss and cuddle."

You got up and squealed when Levi slapped your ass. "Naughty."

"You know I am."

You hummed a laugh and made your way to your and Levi's private bathroom connected to your bedroom. Normally, you'd go to the one downstairs but there was something in this one that you needed. Inside this bathroom, there were a few pregnancy tests. Everyone wanted another Ackerman in this family, but you didn't know if it was going to happen so soon with the talks.

You took three tests and cleaned up. You weren't expecting a positive but you just wanted to give it a go. You collected the tests and shoved them in your pocket before making your way back to your husband and daughter. He made your heart flutter by taking sweetly with his little girl and teaching her about dogs.

"Cute."

Levi sat back and smiled. "Thank you." He eyed your pocket. "What you got?"

You handed him the three tests. "I thought I'd give them a go."

He hummed and looked at them. "Holy sugar! Honey? You're pregnant."

Your eyes widened. "What?"

He jumped up with a grin and showed you the tests. "Look! Three positives! We're having another baby!"

You squealed in delight as Levi scooped you up and spun around with you. "A baby!"

Lilly ran over. "Baby? Where?"

Levi put you down. "In mummy's tummy. You're going to be a big sister!"

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

You giggled as Lilly ran around. "A puppy and two kids. What a wonderful family."

Levi kissed you. "It's perfect."

196 notes · View notes

jiminjamms · 8 months

Text

sex therapy :: 19. open up

chapter tags/warnings: dad! toji. angsty! megumi. strong language. classism. infidelity. manipulative undertones. naoya sucks ass.

word count: 3.6k

notes: thank you for waiting for this update! i was taking exams for some work-related licenses and started my big girl recently. i've also added more chapters to this series because i underestimated when i first planned out the fic. likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated. enjoy! xoxo

fic masterlist | 01. 02. 03. 04. 05. 06. 07. 08. 09. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33.

“Can...we talk?”

At first, Toji blinked.

Naturally, he wasn’t sure how to react to such a situation: his client, who he had assumed avoided him for weeks, now standing at his apartment door? This was new.

He didn’t quite understand how or why you ended up here at this hour, but he forced a worried smile. “Yeah, of course, we can talk.”

When you first tried to speak, your voice only came out as a hoarse croak. So you had to clear your throat, and you forced words to come out again.

“I’m sorry,” you managed to eke out.

“Sorry?” Toji raised a brow in surprise. “For what?”

Hesitating, you bit gently at your inner cheek. “If I tell you, can you please promise me you won’t get mad? Or judge me? I’m just...looking for someone to talk to, and I really, really need you to promise me.”

In hindsight, that was a stupid question because you both knew that listening was his job, his profession, his field of expertise. Even with the minimal information Toji had gathered in these few seconds, he probably began piecing together your story on his own already. He was good like that—that was what made him your therapist, so there was no need to sugarcoat anything when he already read right through you.

Still, Toji eased you with a sturdy nod. “Sure. I promise.”

You didn’t even know where to start in this apology, frankly. You were sorry for doubting him, sorry for ignoring all the red flags he had pointed out about your husband Naoya Zenin. In the end, you were sorry for being so fucking stupid.

The first time Toji had warned you about Naoya, you should have listened. Toji was the expert here, so how blind could you have been? There was nothing like the crushing realization when you realized for yourself that winning your husband back was nothing more than a pipe dream.

Far before marrying you, Naoya had long loved someone else. Sure, ‘love’ may be a strong word, but why else would Naoya never want to be home? He could hardly find interest in you and became revolted when looking your way. He must have felt so wrong, so immoral, when cheating on his side-girlfriend for his wife.

The way Naoya had spoken to you tonight just rubbed salt into the wound. Just shut up. Know your boundaries. Because you were just, in his words, a fucking ornament.

His mistress sure wasn’t, though, and anyone could place the winning bet that he had gone off to spend the night with her.

Why were you not enough?

Was it because she was pretty and you were ugly? That she was smart and you were dumb? That she was funny and you were dull? Just...why? What was the reason?

And, through thick swallows and blinked-back tears, you told Toji all of that.

In one gusto, you have once again dumped all your troubles upon his shoulders. A horrible person, that was what you were—and knowing this, your gaze stayed low.

From your rambling onslaught, Toji must be processing a lot but gave away no emotional indication. From his years at work, he probably had heard it all.

You waited for Toji to retort with a pompous ‘I told you so!’ or burst into a disdainful laugh—that was how Naoya would have responded. But those reactions never came.

On the contrary, Toji tapped his chest. “Come here.”

You frowned over at him, brushing a stray tear from your chin. “What?”

“Just get over here.”

When you still wavered with reluctance, Toji pulled you tight against him—one hand firmly pressed against your lower back as the other guided your face to nestle by his shoulder.

Not expecting this, you were initially stiff and awkward in his arms. Toji’s chest was hard and muscled rather than comfortable, chiseled from his frequent strength training sessions at the gym. But when he began to rub slow circles at your waist with one hand, the other running up and down your back in gentle strokes, something about these little gestures let all your emotions go.

Slowly, you brought your arms up to wrap around him, hugging him in response. He was warm, his body like a furnace that heated your skin. You curled your hands into tight fists, grabbing the fabric of his T-shirt along with your hold. 

Then, like floodgates bursting, you melted into Toji with a sob.

“What have I done wrong?” you wailed. “Why can’t I do anything right? What do I even do from here?”

Toji listened silently as you continued to bawl, releasing all your anger and pain from the terrible weeks that you had endured. He squeezed you the tightest when you sobbed the loudest, comforting you with his ‘there there’ hums.

“Everything will be okay,” he affirmed eventually, but his words seemed so difficult to believe.

“No! Everything won’t be okay, Toji,” you cried and shook your head into his neck. “My husband doesn’t want me. Then, if Naoya doesn’t want me, the Zenins wouldn’t want me. Then, no one will want me!”

“Not true,” Toji was quick to say. He pulled you closer, his large hands patting your upper back too. “Forget Naoya, he’s an utter jerk. He might leave you, but you know who won’t? At the very least, your father won’t—he loves you.”

“But I would have disappointed him.”

“How?” he countered sharply. “If he had known how his son-in-law was treating his daughter, why would your father be disappointed in you?”

Between sniffles, you ruminated his points, half-convinced.

Toji, breathing out, then added, “Also...I won’t leave you, either. I care about you. There. You’ve already got two on your side. You will not be alone.”

“But then, what about,” you kept your lips pressed onto his collarbone, “What about the Zenins? Would they turn their backs on me too?”

Underneath your fingertips, you could feel Toji tensing at the name. “With a family so large, there are bound to be those supporting you as well. You make it sound like all his aunts, his uncles, his...,” he paused briefly, “...his cousins, all worship Naoya when a household like that is rife with drama beneath surface level. Family isn’t family for something like the Zenins. Politics comes first. Business comes first.”

His answer came out with such confidently that you silently questioned how he could be so sure.

But you suddenly remembered the kind embraces from Mai and your heart softened at the thought of Maki.

Maybe Toji was right.

A soundless sigh flew from your mouth before your arms tightened around Toji's torso, hugging him and resting your chin on his shoulder. After several moments longer, you finally released one long exhale, your tears having stopped and your breathing less erratic.

Your heart was like lead in your chest, but you pulled your face away from him.

“I’m sorry,” you rasped, throat raw. “My makeup got onto your shirt.”

Toji’s smile was soft.

“That’s fine.” He couldn’t give a damn about his white top. Reassuringly, he ran his hands along your waist before settling on your hips, thumbs rubbing circles into your skin. “As long as you are feeling better, that’s all I need. Besides, that’s my job, yes?”

“Yes...” you mumbled shyly, wiping tears from your face with the heel of your hand.

At the sight, Toji reached toward a tissue box behind the door frame.

“Don’t cry anymore. Naoya isn’t worth the heartache, I’ll guarantee you that.” He dabbed at your pretty face with the napkin in his hands, wiping away not only the remaining tears but also the stream of snot. Lovely. “I am your friend, okay? Before the therapist stuff. We will fix this, together. That’s what friends are for.”

Friends.

When Toji first called him your friend, you did not think that he would somehow become your closest confidant.

You leaned into his touch briefly, sinking into the comfort of his palm.

“Feeling better, princess?”

Toji watched you with a chartreuse glimmer in his eyes before you finally pulled yourself from his grasp. His fingers flexed at the lost touch, almost like he was hesitant to let you go, but who was he to stop you? It wasn’t like Toji was your husband or anything.

"I am,” you replied. “Thank you.”

“Any time.” He hummed in the ensuing silence before stepping to the side. “Since you’re already here, why don’t you come in? I wouldn’t want you going back like this. Naoya won’t be home, so at least you will have some company here.”

Tempting.

“I really shouldn’t stay...”

“What? Are you sure?”

No, you were not sure, and Toji sure as hell knew that.

He lolled his head toward the interior, a few of his black strands sliding across his forehead with the movement.

“C’mon, I won’t bite,” he reassured before chuckling, “unless...you want me to.”

You shot the therapist a glare, but the resolve to stay upset faded when you saw him gleam with a wide smirk. Well? that mischievous spark in him seemed to say. What do you think?

Rolling your eyes, you initially snorted at the offer but could not help smiling at the stupid joke immediately afterward. Your body crumpled forward as you burst into giggles, realizing that this was the first time in weeks that you were...laughing?

“Fine,” you relented.

Toji seemed to beam in silent victory, which was cute coming from someone who looked so tough. He swept his arm in a gentle arc toward his apartment.

“Then, after you, m’lady.”

You gusYou gushed at the title.

"If you insist,” and you stepped in.

The warmth from his condo was the first to greet you as though a fireplace had been crackling in the distance. For someone who somehow had the means to afford such a luxurious space, Toji went simple in his furnishings. His cream-colored walls were cleared, save for some framed art pieces that dotted the corridors, and there were no ornate cabinets or dazzling décor. His taste in minimalism and timelessness contrasted with the grandeur in your palatial-like residence, but both styles had their appeal.

He had a gray and beige color scheme going on with the couches, the tabletops, and the lighting fixtures. The walnut wood flooring added a rustic touch to the apartment, and every corner effortlessly converged refined aesthetics with the sense of home. Even the smell inside was cozy because the apartment emanated of him—of Toji himself: spices with the redolence of bergamot and sage.

He guided you through a (very wide) hallway that opened into an equally expansive living room. Towards the side was a spiral staircase that led to an upper floor and, further ahead, floor-to-ceiling windows opened to an evening panorama.

The sky was completely dark, with the sun sunk below the horizon long ago, and the waxing moon hung like a silver sliver far away. Holding your breath, you stepped towards the glass, observing the bustle far below that twinkled like firecrackers against the concrete backdrop.

“You know, your place...is a lot nicer than I expected.”

The man tucked his large hands into his front pockets. “I’m offended.”

Instantly, you grew flustered. “No, I didn’t mean it like that!” (Yes, you totally did.) “It’s just that Sukuna had made it sound like—” That you were dirt poor. “But then Geto said...” Okay, you shouldn’t be dragging more people into this. “Never mind.”

Quickly, you glanced back outside again, hoping to look like you were distracted by the vista.

“But then Sukuna and Geto said what?” Toji pried, not letting you live this down. He appeared uncharacteristically intrigued. He wanted to know what his coworkers had spilled, by how much you knew. “What have the other therapists said about me?”

“Ah, nothing much really,” you confessed, which was the truth to some extent.

“How much is ‘nothing much?’”

“Just, well,” you rolled your lips together in thought, “maybe that something, some event, or some person wronged you.” Geto’s words rang fresh in your head. “That ‘Toji just isn’t where he could possibly be.’”

Half-expectantly, you looked over at the said man from under your lashes, waiting for him to comment on the matter. Toji always appeared so hesitant to talk about his past, but you hoped that he would stop being so mysterious. It was as though he was an enigma for cautious reasons, assessing how much he could open up before he could entirely trust you.

Toji had pursed his lips as the silence in the living room became uncomfortable. But just when he appeared ready to speak, someone else filled the silence for him.

“Why the hell are you here?”

All heads turned to a frowning teenager who stood by the foot of the stairs.

He had dark eyes—dark eyes glared only at you, narrowed into a violent abyss as though he was mentally aiming daggers into your soul. For a fleeting moment, you were puzzled at who this boy was until Toji spoke first.

“That’s no way to greet a guest, Megumi.”

Oh, right. Toji had an eighteen-year-old son, and Megumi was his name. While you had spoken with the teenager on the phone before, it was different to see him in person for the first time.

For starters, the physical similarities between father and son became immediately apparent. Sure, Toji’s features had a rough edge around them—shaped from his additional years in life—but the two shared the same black stands, pointed noses, and taut lips. There was no denying the flawless genes that flowed between them.

Megumi, though, had a subtle softness to him. The teenager was smaller and shorter compared to his imposing and rugged father, but he tried to mask that youthful innocence instead with his brash style. He pulled off that ‘wild’ look better than most boys his age could, his hair longer and more tousled. The way he stood in a contrapposto, coupled with how stylish he appeared in his fuchsia tee and black cargo pants, made him look like a model from a streetwear magazine. He reached for an ear piercing with fingers adorned with flashy rings, toying with one particular stud as he examined you.

Goodness, Megumi Fushiguro was as good-looking as Sukuna had hyped him up to be.

“Well?” the boy’s irritated voice snapped you back to the present. “What are you doing at our apartment?”

“Oh, me?” You pointed to yourself. Well, no shit. Who else was he talking to? “I, um—”

“You’re another one of my dad’s women, aren’t you?” the teenager asked out of the blue, leaving you staring at him dumbly.

“One of your dad’s who?”

“Hey!” Toji warned, tone sharp. Frowning at the boy, he reprimanded him with one forceful thwack. Dad Toji was very different than Therapist Toji. “Watch what you—"

“You’re the one who called me down here!” Megumi shouted back, pushing his father’s arm away.

“Yes, I did. So what took you ten minutes to get here?”

“I was in the middle of Valorant. I left my team mid-game but for this?”

And suddenly, there was this thick and awkward tension that engulfed the room. If you had the magical ability to teleport at will, you would. Toji was obviously distraught at his son’s outburst and Megumi was similarly bristled by your presence.

About you? Well, there wasn’t anything you could do.

You took a few steps back. It was unsettling to be caught in a heated confrontation between father and son, and you silently wondered if you should just slip away to let those two sort out their miscommunications.

“So, this is your new strategy, huh?” Megumi seethed vehemently toward his father, capitalizing upon the silence. “Telling me that Nobara and Yuuji are here only for you to introduce me to, out of everyone in this world, her?!”

The attack felt personal when Megumi raised his arm and pointed squarely at you, even if the boy glowered at his dad instead. You had frozen, stopped by confusion, as Megumi continued in anger: “What is the meaning of this!”

Toji, who was returning his son’s glare, glanced at you briefly. He didn’t show this side to him very often: the one where he was just a single dad, handling a moody teenage son at home.

You wondered if Toji felt weird that you were watching him deal with Megumi’s tantrum. At least, he must be embarrassed that this was how your first encounter with Megumi was going, but he didn’t offer much into his internal dialogue because he clenched his teeth, his eyes sliding slowly to his son again.

“Megumi,” Toji started, “please...don’t point at people. That’s not nice.”

His voice was sterner than before, but the boy responded with a dramatic scoff.

“Nice?!” Megumi repeated. “You want me to be nice to her? Is this some sick joke?!” His face twisted with disbelief. “With all the horrible crap that had happened to us, what good thing has she ever done? Just because she’s pretty, and suddenly, you’ve forgiven her for everything?”

You blinked, stumped.

Forgive you?

Why would Toji need to forgive you?

Perplexed, you turned to Toji but he did not meet your gaze.

“There is nothing to forgive her for. She hasn’t done anything wrong,” the older man defended, but Megumi wanted to hear none of this.

He was out for blood.

“That’s because you’re too fucking infatuated to see the demon she is,” he huffed, voice laced with bitterness. “Dad, I wish you would put your goddamn brain to use and stop thinking with your dick first.”

“Language!” Toji snapped with a roar. “She’s our friend!”

“Friend, my ass! I don’t like your fucking friends!”

With eyes blown wide, Megumi clenched his fists so tightly that his hands began to shake.

“I just...I just can’t believe you,” and when his voice cracked, there was pain that bubbled from the frustration. “I already told you that I don’t want to meet whoever you are bringing home. Just stop trying so hard for my sake. This hurts me, and this also hurts you. Can’t you see that, Dad? Nothing’s going to bring Mom back! I’m over that, alright?” His Adam’s apple bobbed when he gulped, though, before he finally added: “And I’m tired!”

At that, Megumi walked—correction, stormed—away.

“Fuck this shit,” he spat and marched up the stairs, grumbling more profanities upon his climb.

The footsteps’ volume started to fade, but not before a loud bang startled you when Megumi slammed his bedroom door shut, the entire apartment seemingly shuddering with the sound.

Beside you, the Toji that you had always known—the snarky man who always seemed so unruffled by even the wildest moments—crumbled a little when he sighed. He rubbed his face with a free hand, sinking his forehead into his palm as he muttered indiscernibly.

He collected himself he turned back around to you, but you saw that his shoulders sagged with an invisible weight, the emerald glimmer in his eyes now a dim flicker. Within ten minutes, Toji had grown to look stressed and incredibly tired.

“Hey,” Toji started, his voice impossibly small for a man as large as him. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sorry that you had to see that. He’s usually a good kid. I’ll talk to him again later.”

You bit your lip.

“Oh, um...Well...That’s okay,” you eventually replied, which was a total lie because that was not okay. Even as you offered a small smile for support, Megumi—his words, his tone, his ferocious glare—slashed at your heart. You rationalized his behavior aloud to ease your own pain. “Megumi’s eighteen, and you know what teenagers are like: hormonal with their mood swings all the time. You are a great father, Toji. This isn’t your fault.”

“No. This is my fault,” he replied very quickly.

Oh. So instead you said: “I get it.”

“Except you don’t get it.”

Your heart sank at his words, realizing that you truly did not understand where this father-son conflict stemmed from. Was it...was it because of you?

You never intended to burden anyone, yet your mere existence appeared to be doing just that.

It was painful to see Toji like this. During your lowest lows, he always offered considerable comfort and renewed confidence, but you weren’t sure what to say to provide him with the same. By some weird twisted fate, Toji now needed you more than you needed him. As a therapist, he had a special soothing effect, and never have you so badly wished for the same.

“Then,” this time you were more careful with your words, “Then, help me understand. Help me so that I can then help you.”

Tone resolute, you longed to learn about the unspoken difficulties that Toji had been facing by himself. While you had your troubles, he must have had many more for his son—not even Toji himself—to act this way.

Perhaps you also cared for him more than you thought because, as he noted himself, he’s your friend.

Toji held a long inhale, thinking and thinking and thinking, before breathing out in one audible go.

“Where do I even start?”

last chapter || next chapter

end notes: I loved fleshing out our relationship with Toji from a channel to mutually release sexual frustrations to a friendship built upon shared vulnerabilities. Also, Megumi is very much in his emo and rebellious teenage era. Like most people his age, he has his reasons…

taglist: @dissociatingdiva @httpsplanetmarsdotcom @nemoyr @huangfairy @shadowarchon @203steph @agentdedf1sh @cloudybabes @hinativity @lynn-writes-things @illicitwriter @7oji @kikuchimi @piqer @nobody289x @chaoticjojofan @musicisme333 @vvestwoodrose @kumocchin @s-guru @mwahilovemylife @hey-gurls69 @cloudsinthecosmos @moon-mumu-moon @kazscara @obitohno @skilerfrostfairy @funicidals @nico707 @proteovaldez @tsukiyohanayome @marimoares @qirbys @moodpi @blackdragoncigarette @puffaloxx @shoisae @sakanoshitaa @arizzu @kissditrio @tokyometronetwork @downtown-roponggi @the-cosmos-network

326 notes · View notes

respectthepetty · 11 months

Text

So . . .

I'm fucked.

Pisaeng is now my baby boy, and I'm fully invested in his well-being. He took so many hits this episode, and I'm taking it personally.

Let's recap exactly how this episode hurt Piseang's and my feelings because I need to make sure I deliver the maximum damage to myself:

Kawi telling Piseang that he is intentionally creating distance between them because Pisaeng makes him feel uncomfortable and unsafe in front of the pink neon light and sign that reads "Extending our friendship, connection, and happiness to you all" was the cherry on top of this shitty pain sandwich.

Kawi chasing Pisaeng to the parking lot just to shove money into his face, so he won't owe Pisaeng anything.

DJ Squirtle! Pisaeng was so excited to give Kawi this, only to throw it at him from the car after such a horrible day.

Pisaeng turned down Pear's invite, but lit up when Kawi invited him out for drinks, only to be ambushed by a group that included Knot.

Pisaeng mentioned not being comfortable around him. Knot is misogynistic and Kawi KNOWS he is an asshole in the future, yet Knot keeps making comments about Pisaeng's sex life and the fact that they went to an all-boys school. Knot also mentioned believing Kawi was with Max (aka GAY), so is Knot homophobic and this is another reason Pisaeng does not want this dumpster in his life?

On the topic of Max, my other baby boy - Is this the reason for their dispute? Max could be gay and Kawi didn't like the implication that they might be in a relationship? Also, he was supposed to meet Max later. Did he? Or did he go out with Knot and the guys instead? He check-marked Max off his list, but this won't be as simple as he is making it if he continues to be friendly with Knot if his issues with Max really do stem from queerness.

Back to my other baby boy - Pear does like Pisaeng, but more importantly, IS MY BABY BOY DEPRESSED?! He is lonely. His old friends suck. His new friend said he makes him uncomfortable. He doesn't want to feel the pressure from Pear's dad. What is his relationship with his own parents? WHO IS THERE FOR MY BOY?!

He looked like he was going to cry in that classroom when Kawi told him he was annoying. He was trying to keep his shit together but was *this* close to having a breakdown when he was scrambling to gather his stuff so he could haul ass out of there. He didn't even turn in the quiz.

LOOK AT HIM!

I'm glad Kawi chased after him, but Pisaeng is really begging for someone to care about it, yet Kawi refuses.

He is quick to forgive and share his food with Kawi, so when Kawi told him that he is bothered by Pisaeng's behavior (thinking it's funny when Kawi is upset), Pisaeng clearly looked pained to know he unintentionally hurt Kawi. He wanted to fix it, but Kawi left immediately when Knot showed up.

Kawi turning down every offer Pisaeng extended to hang out upset him, and he even mentioned it later in the classroom. He tried to joke it off in the class, but he was hurt when it happened.

He went from being happy seeing Kawi and Pear together, to being somber since the realization of what he set in motion hit him.

Because he likes Kawi, a guy he can't have.

And he has liked him the entire time. TEN YEARS!

The worst part of all of this is Kawi isn't bad. He is trying to fix this, yet is delivering the most blows to my guy. He doesn't want Pear to be hurt in the future, so he must keep his distance from Pisaeng. He doesn't want to owe Pisaeng, so he pays him back. He doesn't want Pisaeng to be lonely, so he tries to mend his friendships. He wants his life to be better, which includes befriending Max again, saving his dad's life, and being with Pear, but he is missing what is right in front of him. He needs Pisaeng for his life to be better.

And then next week?!

Yeah, so like I wrote.

I'm fucked.

#be my favorite #be my favorite the series #pisaeng x kawi #is this show about to be a Hot Tops for me?#Pisaeng is my baby boy and I'm about to fight everyone in this show #Treat him with kindness and love!#And then Max!#I can't believe this is happening #I'm feeling feelings for the pursuer in a JittiRain show

362 notes · View notes

cherienymphe · 1 year

Text

When The Party’s Over XI (Rafe Cameron x Reader)

Warnings: NON-CON, DUB-CON, ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, forbidden relationship, violence, public sex, jealousy, underage drinking, drug use, manipulation, corruption, forced pregnancy, innocent reader, Heyward!reader

➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies | divider by @silkholland

➥ series masterlist

summary: Manipulated into a secret relationship with Rafe Cameron, you’re finding it much easier said than done to do the right thing and walk away…especially when he refuses to let you.

“You want to hear something funny?”

That should’ve been your first clue that you were about to hear something that was indeed, not funny. Your dad had a familiar look on his face as he stood in the kitchen, but funnily enough, it was a look you’d only ever seen directed at Pope. You paused in your chewing, nervously watching him as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“I ran into Ward Cameron today…”

If at all possible, you felt your stomach drop straight to the floor. You were sure your feelings were reflected on your face, and in all this time you went along with Rafe’s lie, you never thought of what you would do if your dad and Ward ran into each other…and started talking. You struggled to swallow, licking your lips.

“Dad-.”

“I mentioned all of this so called ‘tutoring’ that you’ve been doing for his daughter, and you know what? He had no idea what I was talking about.”

You pressed your lips together, guilt and shame eating away at you as he just stared at you in disappointment. That was worse than him yelling, and the silence in the kitchen was loud.

“So, now, I have a question for you,” he mused. “Just what have you been doing and where have you been these past few months? Hmm?”

It’s not like you could very well tell him you’d been sneaking around with and sleeping with Rafe Cameron. That just wasn’t going to happen, and so you decided for a half-truth instead.

“With Cam and Bunny,” you sighed.

“Those two little rich girls you went to school with?” he looked so confused. “…and just what have you been doing with them that you had to lie about it?”

“Nothing! We just hang out sometimes. In the pool, eating, watching movies that kind of stuff,” you explained. “…and because Cam is dating Kelce, sometimes Topper and Rafe are there. Rafe drives me home, sometimes.”

You watched the older man heave a tired sigh, rubbing his forehead as he moved to sit down across from you. He fixed you with a look, and you continued.

“I like hanging out with them,” you told him. “…and I hate being the only one who has to leave early because of a curfew. Especially when I’m tired, and I’d rather just sleep over at my friend’s house or something.”

He was quiet, contemplating, and so you just decided to do the right thing.

“I’m sorry,” you eventually said. “I know I shouldn’t have lied, but it seemed like the only way you’d let me stay out so late or stay over at a friend’s. Pope doesn’t have a curfew, at all.”

“Pope earned that.”

You grew silent at that, withering under his disappointed stare.

“…and he earned it by following our rules and not lying to us.”

“I know,” you whispered.

“You know you’re grounded, right?”

You expected it, but it still sucked to hear.

“For two weeks.”

That really sucked to hear.

“You could’ve just been honest, you know. We could’ve talked, come to some kind of understanding, but instead you decided to be sneaky…”

“I know.”

He stood, the chair scraping, and you swallowed.

“…and the fact that you got the Cameron boy to lie for you.”

He was shaking his head when you looked up.

“Two weeks…and after that, we’re going to reevaluate some things, but you can expect to give us some kind of itinerary for what you’re doing and where you’ll be every day.”

You watched him go, and you let your head fall when he was gone. You shouldn’t have been surprised that that lie came back to bite you in the ass, and as if he sensed your new lack of freedom, your phone went off, unsurprised to see Rafe’s name. Appetite gone, you got rid of your dish, making your way to your room and bringing your phone to your ear.

“Whatever you have planned, you’ll have to forget about it,” was how you greeted him. “I’m grounded.”

“Grounded?” Rafe replied. “Why?”

“My dad ran into your dad…”

You let your words stew in the air for a moment, and Rafe’s soft sigh told you that he understood exactly what had happened. He didn’t respond right away, and for a second, you feared he just wouldn’t. Since the other night, Rafe had been acting weird, quieter, less easy to read. That very next morning, when you’d kissed him, you’d noticed it then, and you had pulled away, curiously eyeing him.

“You okay?” you had softly asked, and Rafe had just looked at you for a moment before throwing you a crooked smile.

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

You hadn’t had much of an answer to that, not wanting to remind him of your little fight the night before. Sure, you’d called him back as soon as you got inside your room, but like clockwork, apologies had been falling from his lips, telling you he was going to do better. You’d both seemingly put it behind you, but that didn’t necessarily mean it was. Still, Rafe hadn’t talked on it anymore, and you let it go.

It didn’t change the fact that something was off though. You could just tell.

“For how long?” he finally asked.

“Two weeks.”

While technically, yes, you were an adult, it was less than six months ago when you needed permission just to leave the classroom. Your parents would lose their minds if you decided you just weren’t going to listen to them anymore and considering that decision would no doubt have to come with a new roof too, you decided to just suck it up.

“Well, I guess I’ll be sneaking into your room a lot more often in the next fourteen days.”

You both chuckled at that, and you sat down.

“I guess so,” you said. “I should’ve known it would catch up to me, and now…they’re going to be even stricter than they were before.”

“Shame, really,” Rafe murmured. “I was thinking about taking you out on my boat.”

You perked up at that.

In all the time you’d been dating Rafe, he hadn’t taken you on it. It wasn’t like you had this burning desire to go on it, but with mentions of it, you’d definitely entertained the thought. Rafe had even brought it up once before, but considering the secrecy of your relationship, you were sure at least a few people would see you climbing aboard and sailing off with him.

“Not if we go out at night,” he’d replied. “…and come back at night.”

It had appealed to you, and Rafe had mentioned going when the weather was perfect. It had only been in passing, but your chest bloomed with the prospect of actually going, now.

“Really?” you said, laying down. “Now, you decide is the perfect time when I’m grounded?”

“They’ll expect you to be in your room most of your sentence, anyway, right?” he teased, and you rolled your eyes.

God knows it was risky, but truthfully, getting grounded for an extra two weeks or so would be worth spending a night or two on Rafe’s boat with him. Especially when every night of those two weeks would consist of Rafe sneaking into your room.

“I’ll have to think about it,” you teased, and Rafe softly laughed.

You both knew your answer, but he played along, finally hanging up after promising to come over tomorrow night.

Being grounded meant that if you needed to leave the house, then Pope was going with you. It meant going out and coming straight back, and as annoying as it was, it was better than not leaving the house, at all. On this particular day, Sarah and JJ tagged along too, waiting in the vehicle while you quickly browsed the aisles.

The last person you expected to run into was Topper, and without Pope breathing down your neck, you sent the blond a friendly smile.

“Hey.”

His response was even, cold even, and you frowned in confusion as he brushed past you. Funnily enough, you would say you were friends, something you never thought you’d think about Topper Thornton. So, his reception was mind-boggling, and you turned to stare after him. You started to say something, but Topper was pretty determined in getting as far away from you as possible.

You frowned at his back as he walked away, and forcing yourself not to linger on what that was about, you decided to finish getting what you needed. Pope was just as irritated about having to drive you around, rushing you as soon as you were back in sight.

“We saw Topper come out of there not long before you did,” Sarah commented as soon as you buckled up. “You didn’t run into him, did you?”

You hadn’t quite had the opportunity to tell Sarah that she was completely wrong about you and Topper, and now certainly wasn’t the time. Besides, you didn’t know if you could call what had happened ‘running into him’, so you sort of lied and told her no. You could feel her eyes on you as you looked out of the window, too deep in thought about what that could’ve been about.

It was only when Pope dropped you off back at home did it finally occur to you.

“Hey,” you softly started hours later when Rafe had snuck in through your window. “Did you…did you say anything to Topper?”

He was propped up on his elbow, gazing at you as you played with his shirt. As the question left your lips, you looked up at him, meeting his blue gaze.

“I told him about us,” you continued. “…and I told him it was alright to bring it up with you, and I just assumed he had.”

Despite the fact that Rafe hadn’t brought it up, and neither did you, there seemed to be something unspoken in the air that he knew you’d talked with Topper. Your boyfriend shifted, and you intently watched him.

“Nothing crazy,” he told you, and you frowned. “Just cleared the air, made sure he understands how I feel about you.”

You let out a light chuckle, but it wasn’t exactly humorous.

“…but now he won’t even look at me. He barely talked to me when I ran into him at the store.”

Rafe shrugged, fingers dipping under your shirt, and your eyes slightly narrowed.

“You did…didn’t you?”

Rafe sighed, letting out a bitter chuckle, and you sat up, forcing him to too.

“Since when do you care about Topper?” he harshly questioned, and you shook your head.

“Since he’s damn near terrified of even talking to me, now,” you scoffed. “He’s kind of my friend too, you know, or at least, he was.”

“Really,” Rafe dryly commented, resting his arms on his knees as he stared you down. “Since when?”

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe since your friends started hanging out with my friends. Or maybe since Cam and Kelce started dating. Or better yet, maybe when we started dating and I was forced to be around him half as much as I’m around you.”

Rafe nodded, looking away.

“You seem really invested in someone you know through me.”

You didn’t even know how to react to that, pressing our lips together and shaking your head.

“That’s not even the point,” you harshly whispered. “He was practically tripping over himself just to get away from me, and you think that’s okay?”

Rafe didn’t respond, and you continued.

“Random guys at parties are one thing, but Topper is your best friend. I thought that these trust issues were with the so-called creepy guys, but now I’m starting to see there’s a common denominator, here, and it’s me,” you defeatedly told him. “Clearly, the lack of trust is with me.”

Rafe finally heaved a sigh, moving to face you and reaching for you.

“That’s not true…”

“It has to be!”

You snapped your mouth shut, listening to make sure you hadn’t woken anyone up before continuing, quieter this time.

“I don’t even need to know what you said to him to know that it was probably really shitty and messed up,” you hissed. “This can’t be our whole relationship. It can’t, Rafe.”

You stood, and so did he. You watched him run his hands down his face, slowly approaching you and reaching for you again. You were too annoyed to move, unintentionally letting him, and Rafe pulled you closer.

“I just told him what you mean to me,” Rafe gently told you. “Maybe Topper just doesn’t think it’s right to be so friendly with you, now.”

You eyed him.

“Be serious, please.”

“I don’t have to tell you what we talked about, that’s between me and Top, but if you think I went around threatening my best friend or something, you’re wrong,” he said, continuing when you sighed. “I’m serious. He knows you’re my girlfriend, now, and that’s just probably all he sees you as.”

You didn’t really believe Rafe, but you didn’t have much choice, at the moment. You weren’t stupid. You knew he said something to Topper that went beyond just how he felt about you, and this was one of those moments where you found yourself reevaluating your relationship. Since the night of that party, you’d known something was off, and you felt stupid for not immediately guessing Rafe’s jealousy.

Of course, it was Rafe’s jealousy.

The energy to be mad, to care, didn’t even stay with you for long. You were grounded, and the highlight of this prison sentence was sneaking around with Rafe, and you didn’t want to spend your now limited time together fighting. You moved by him without saying another word, feeling his eyes on you as you laid back down.

He was lying. You knew he was lying, and for some reason, that made you want to cry. Rafe said he loved you. He’d looked you in the eyes and told you that he loved you, but the lack of trust said otherwise. Was Rafe really that insecure? Or did he just think that low of you? You heard him call your name, but you pretended not to hear, closing your eyes.

You knew that this needed to be nipped in the bud for good, but you were too disappointed to go there, now. Rafe had told you he was going to be better about his jealousy, and maybe he had meant it at the time, but his intentions then didn’t really matter all that much, now. Night ruined, you just wanted to go to sleep, uncaring about what Rafe chose to do.

You were quiet as you looked out over the water, the ocean breeze ruffling Rafe’s shirt against your thighs. You were finally on his boat, experiencing what should’ve been a romantic break for you both, but it was soured by the cloud hanging over your heads. It had taken more money that you wanted to give and more begging than you’d anticipated to convince Pope to cover for you, under the impression you just wanted to spend a night or two at Bunny’s.

He'd have a stroke if he knew the truth.

The morning after you’d gone to bed angry and disappointed, Rafe had been there, waking you up with a plethora of “I’m sorry”s as he peppered kisses along your face. You hadn’t been in the most forgiving mood, but when Rafe wanted to be sweet, he was the sweetest, and against your will, he’d worn you down. You still wanted to know just what he said to Topper, but you’d forced yourself to let it go.

Temporarily, anyway.

Now, though, alone on his boat, it was glaring more than ever that your less than perfect relationship probably deserved a more serious label than that. It wasn’t just less than perfect. It was troubled because Rafe was troubled, and you were starting to worry that until he wasn’t, your relationship wouldn’t be either.

You felt like your mood was noticeable. Even as excited as you’d been when Rafe snuck you out, and as enthusiastic as you’d been when he’d decided to christen the bedroom below deck, you were pretty sure your dampened spirit was obvious. You looked over your shoulder as Rafe came back up, nursing a drink, and you thought to yourself that it was better than coke.

“It’s so much prettier up here,” you told him, reaching for him.

He made his way closer, and you didn’t miss the way he swayed slightly. You frowned a bit at that, but brushed it off, looking back out towards the ocean. The sun was setting, and it made for a perfect view, and you leaned back as Rafe wrapped an arm around you. You were a decent ways off the coast with no chance of any familiar boats passing by, and you heard Rafe take another sip before dipping his head down.

“I fucked up.”

He murmured the words into your skin, and you closed your eyes.

“I…I may have told Topper some not so nice things.”

You sighed, both proud and disappointed as he admitted the truth. You could smell the alcohol on his breath as he breathed, and you really didn’t know what to say.

“You don’t get it,” he choked out.

You were moving away before he was even done, and he reached for you. When you looked at him, his blue eyes were glassy, and he opened and closed his mouth, struggling to voice his thoughts.

“You never saw the way he looked at you before he knew about us,” he confessed, and you resisted the urge to roll your eyes. “He liked to look…a lot, and if he and Bunny hadn’t…”

Rafe trailed off, waving his hand as he allowed your mind to fill in the blanks that his apparently already had. You didn’t even know what to say to that, frowning at him and shaking your head.

“He’s your best friend, Rafe.”

“I know…”

“…and he didn’t know! Now, he’s terrified of even breathing in my direction,” you scoffed. “Is that how you plan to navigate the rest of this relationship?”

“I messed up, okay?”

He sniffed, and you turned away, moving to stand near the steps, away from him. You could feel his eyes on you, and when you looked up, Rafe’s gaze was pleading.

“He’s your best friend,” you reminded him. “You shouldn’t treat him like some horny creep off the street.”

Rafe didn’t say anything to that.

“He knows about us, now, and he knows what I mean to you, so don’t you think you should apologize?”

Rafe simply stared at you as you said that, and you watched him down the rest of his drink. He didn’t speak for a while, and for a moment, you were convinced that he was going to agree.

“Why are you so concerned with Topper?”

“…because he’s your friend, and I think what you did was pretty shitty,” you said like it was obvious.

Rafe nodded at that, pulling his lip between his teeth as he did.

“Look, I saw that he was kind of into you, and I just made it clear I wasn’t going to sit back and watch that, anymore, okay?” you watched him move to pour another drink. “…but maybe you actually liked that.”

He said that last part more to himself, but you heard him all the same. Your face pinched into a frown, and you stared at him.

“Excuse me?”

He took another sip, and you shook your head, walking towards him.

“Ok, clearly, you’ve had more than enough.”

You chuckled, trying to make light of the suddenly tense atmosphere, but Rafe pulled his hand away as you reached for his drink. The look he gave you was cold, and his blue eyes looked between yours.

“I mean, you tell me you want to walk home…but you take a ride from Topper with no problem.”

You froze at that, stomach sinking in disbelief, and you just…stared at him. You felt like you’d just been slapped, unable to believe that Rafe was bringing up something you didn’t even realize was an issue. You’d thought the jealousy was like every other time, merely hating the thought of any guy talking to you, but all of this stemmed from an innocent ride home? This was what had been festering for days?

You let out a light laugh, but Rafe didn’t return it, his expression didn’t even shift.

“Rafe…you can’t be serious.”

“I went back to the party for you,” he spat, shocking you. “I gave you some time to cool off, and when I went back to get you, you were gone.”

He downed the rest of his drink, slamming the glass down, and you jumped at the sound of breaking glass.

“…because you were too busy getting a ride home with Topper.”

You genuinely couldn’t believe this was happening.

“You didn’t hesitate to tell me you weren’t going anywhere with me,” Rafe angrily slurred. “…but you hopped into his car with no hesitation.”

“…and you want me to feel bad about that?” you asked, in disbelief.

“Did you fuck him?”

The question stumped you so much that your jaw actually dropped, and your frown deepened as Rafe stepped closer, any humor left officially gone from the conversation.

“Are you crazy?” you breathed.

“Did you fuck him?” he slowly repeated, and you moved away from him.

“What kind of question is that-?”

“One you still haven’t answered!”

“…because I thought the answer would be obvious,” you spat. “No!”

You watched Rafe run his hands through his hair, drunkenly mumbling to himself, and you couldn’t swallow down your disgust. The already tense conversation had taken a sharp turn, and you couldn’t decide who was worse; your boyfriend when he was high or your boyfriend when he was drunk.

“I mean, I guess no one would blame you if you did, right?”

You felt tears kiss your eyes, and you turned away.

“Topper’s nice and polite, and he has his shit together,” his voice was closer, now. “…you don’t have to worry about bad coping mechanisms with him.”

When Rafe grabbed your arm, you shook him off, moving away, but he followed.

“…and hey…he thinks you’re kind of hot, right?”

You froze as Rafe threw Topper’s words from months ago back at you. You sighed, eyes falling closed, unsurprised that he’d heard that. You remembered his mood later that day, and you suddenly felt so stupid, realizing that Rafe’s jealousy had been rearing it’s ugly head for months.

“You’re drunk, and I’m not entertaining this,” you told him.

Every time you moved away, Rafe followed, and his hand was on your wrist when you found yourself near the steps.

“You really expect me not to say anything to him when we both know he would’ve fucked you if you gave him the chance?” Rafe nastily said, his face inches from yours.

You pulled your arm from his wrist, forcing yourself to take a step down. Even when high, you’d never witnessed Rafe this…bad before, and your heart raced in your chest as he looked down his nose at you.

“He didn’t mean anything by that, Rafe, and even he did, he didn’t know we were together then,” you said. “The fact that you think I would even do that is-.”

“You couldn’t wait to be rid of me-.”

“We’d just gotten into a fight, Rafe! I was angry-.”

You cut yourself off when Rafe stepped closer, the action making you nervous, and you slipped, falling at the bottom of the steps, hanging onto the boat. You attempted to stand, but Rafe had followed, standing right before you and preventing you from straightening.

“…and you actually think he offered you a ride out of the goodness of his heart…”

Rafe chuckled at the thought, but it was bitter, mean, and you blinked back tears. He leaned over, and the last thing you expected was for Rafe to fist his hand into your hair, making you cry out and reach for his arm. He was kneeling before you on the higher steps, and you pushed against him.

“I’ll say whatever I want to whoever I want if I feel like they’re trying to take what’s mine,” he sneered. “What’s rightfully mine.”

His hold tightened, and you dug your nails into his hand. This didn’t feel real, and part of you still wasn’t convinced this wasn’t some sick nightmare.

“You are what’s mine in case you’re confused,” he whispered.

“Rafe, let go…”

“Do you have any idea how much that hurt me?”

You struggled to swallow, tears finally spilling over as you stared into his eyes.

“Rafe…you’re scaring me,” you choked out.

The blond paused, lips parting as he gazed at you.

“I’m scaring you,” he repeated, brows pulling together. “What about me?”

You sniffed.

“Huh? You don’t think it scared me when you let my best friend take you home, but you couldn’t get away from me fast enough? You don’t think that was scary to me?”

“Rafe,” you tearfully pleaded.

“I’m scaring you,” he repeated, murmuring the words to himself.

Your boyfriend sniffed, nodding to himself as his face grew stony.

You didn’t understand what happened at first, only realizing that water was suddenly in your mouth and your nose. Your hand was still on the boat, pressing down and sliding along the surface as you tried to straighten yourself. Your knees were on the last steps, and when you realized that a hand was still in your hair, gripping the back of your head, your heart threatened to leap out of your chest.

When you gasped again, instead of sucking in water this time, it was air. A horrible choking sound left your throat as you coughed, water spilling out of your mouth and nose. You furiously blinked, trying to make sense of what had just happened, and your hand joined your other one on Rafe’s wrist, trying to get him to let go when he pushed your head down again.

You could feel one of his hands twisted into the back of his shirt you were wearing, preventing you from going into the water completely. Your feet kicked as best as they could while kneeling, and when you realized that you couldn’t get Rafe to let go, your hand pushed against the boat again, trying to push back. He pushed your head down further, holding it down longer than last time, and at some point, your chest started to burn.

Even with your head underwater, you knew you were crying. It was the perfect moment to have an out of body experience, to feel as if you were outside of your body looking in, but instead, you felt everything. You felt the tight grip of Rafe’s hand in your hair. You felt the force behind his hand as he held you down. You could feel your heart racing and the panic in your chest as your hand continuously slid along the boat.

When Rafe finally pulled you up, he completely let you go, and you fell back on the steps, struggling to breathe. You spit up water onto them, and from the corner of your eye, you saw him stand. Your chest was burning, eyes too, and when you looked at him, you only saw his back as he walked away. He didn’t spare you a second glance as you sat on the steps, drunkenly cursing to himself about you, no doubt.

Your breaths were coming out in choppy wheezes, and you could feel your tears wetting your face, replacing whatever ocean water that was starting to dry. You could hear Rafe getting another drink, and you turned your head away, unable to stop shaking but too scared to move.

You’d been staring at the wall for hours when you heard Rafe coming below deck. You didn’t move, fingers tightening in the sheets as you heard him stop at the entrance. The taste of ocean water was still in your throat, the smell clinging to your hair and skin and shirt. When you heard Rafe softly call your name, you closed your eyes.

He sounded more sober, now, but you didn’t care.

When you closed your eyes, you could still feel his harsh grip in your hair as he held you down. You could see the sneer on his face as he accused you of having sex with Topper. You could see the glint in his blue eyes as he turned into someone you’d never seen before. Only, that wasn’t completely true, was it?

You thought about when he’d grabbed you at Midsummers and that night at the party when you literally woke up with sore wrists. You’d seen this Rafe before, but those times were small unimportant things you’d forced yourself to look past, to make excuses for. But this? Your lips trembled, and you resisted the urge to be sick.

“Y/N…”

You didn’t move when he sat down at your feet, and you felt…numb when he touched you.

“Hey,” he softly said. “Y/N.”

He knew you were awake, and the rawness of your throat reminded you that maybe ignoring him wasn’t the best idea. With a deep breath, you slowly sat up, eyes focused on the sheets. You could feel his gaze on you, and you bit your lip.

“Please, look at me, beautiful. Please,” he begged.

When you did, you didn’t miss the way Rafe frowned, like he was struggling to keep his gaze on you. Yes, he was certainly sobered up, now, and you took in the way his pink lips trembled. He swiped his tongue between them, moving closer, and your heart started to race in your chest.

It wasn’t lost on you that you were alone in the middle of the ocean with him.

“I’m sorry,” he softly breathed, moving to sit right by you, now. “I’m so… I’m so sorry.”

You didn’t respond, keeping your eyes on him like some rabid animal.

“The whole thing with Topper, I…”

He clenched his jaw, repeatedly running his hand through his dirty blond locks.

“I kept thinking about it, and the more I did, the more I just kept drinking, and I just got…so angry,” he explained, and you emptily nodded. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

He reached for your face, and you turned your head, nodding and sniffling.

“It’s-it’s fine.”

It wasn’t.

It was so far from fine it wasn’t even funny. Every time you thought back on it, you wanted to cry, and you struggled to swallow. Your voice was so raw, and sometime during the aftermath, you’d realized that you’d been screaming while your head was underwater. The look Rafe gave you told you that he knew you were lying, and he reached for your face again.

“Rafe, I told you, it’s fine,” you choked out, trying to push him away.

“I’m sorry,” he softly repeated, leaning in, and you pulled away.

“Rafe, I’m tired, okay? I’m really tired, and it’s fine, and…and we can just go to bed,” you struggled to say.

His hands slid to your arms, and his brows were drawn together as he studied you.

“I told you I was sorry-.”

“…and I believe you. I told you it’s fine, Rafe.”

You could tell that your refusal to let him kiss you was bothering him, and again, it hit you that you were alone with him out here. Rafe had made it clear that you would never know what he was capable of, and you felt your stomach churn at the thought of placating him…too afraid to not to, right now.

When his lips brushed against yours, you shuddered, and you squeezed your eyes shut. You couldn’t stop shaking, and when Rafe laid you down, you kept your eyes on the ceiling. He kept telling you how sorry he was, but it didn’t mean anything to you. The minute you got back on land, Rafe would be lucky if he ever saw you again.

In this moment, you wished you hadn’t snuck out, thinking that maybe the universe was trying to look out for you by having your parents ground you. You wondered if this was some horrible lesson you had to learn, and as Rafe pushed himself into you, sighing at the feel of you squeezing him, you were grateful that it was too dark for him to see your tears.

#dark!rafe cameron x reader #dark!rafe cameron #dark rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron #obx fic #obx #Outer Banks #outer banks fanfiction #rafe cameron fic

920 notes · View notes