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buckys-wintersoldier · 2 days

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Complaining by Bucky | Bucky Barnes

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 -> Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 -> Bucky and you like to spend time together even when you’re just cuddling and reading. Also when he gets grumpy because of the book.

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 -> 1.114

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 -> (G) mention of smut but just a bit, fluff

𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭 -> For the Fandom Bingo challenge, could someone request an oneshot, also with a character that you wrote for another oneshot? If so, could you write an oneshot using O2 with Bucky Barnes and the reader reading in their bed cuddled up, while updating the other on what just happened in their book? Thank you so much! Sincerely, Flame. @marvelflame2010

𝐀/𝐍 -> Thank you for the request and yes I’m taking also requests for Bingo squares. This is a cute idea and I hope you like what I made with it. Dividers made by @firefly-graphics.

𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ->

Fandom-Bingo | O2 | Sharing a quiet moment | @fandombingo

Fandom-Free Bingo: Valentine Edition | Alternates One | Triggers | @fandom-free-bingo

Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist

It’s quiet, but not uncomfortable. The warmth of his body is warming yours, his one hand sliding up and down your thigh, and you smile softly. Bucky is focused on his book, but that would never stop him from being close to you, nor would it stop him from touching you softly. The two of you are used to having some quiet moments where you mostly read, often after an exhausting mission where you two just want to be next to each other. Sometimes you are just cuddled up, or one person reads for the other. But today he is sitting next to you, his soft fingers trailing up and down his thigh, and your head rests against his shoulder.

A soft mumble escapes Bucky’s lips, and then he groans, too focused on the book to realize it. Your smile grows; those moments when Bucky is focused and doesn't mean to groan but still does it are way too cute. If you tell someone that your big, super soldier mumbles and complains quietly about things happening in the book, they won’t believe you. His hand squeezes your thigh a bit more, and you know the part in his book turns him on or he is annoyed about whatever happens right now.

“Buck?”

“Mhm?” He doesn’t look up at you, his eyes still focused on the side of the book, while he furrows slightly.

“Don’t you like the book?” You ask, smirking.

He hums in response, finishing the side he is currently reading before he puts his bookmark - which a photo of the two of you - into the book and closes it. He then places it between his legs and turns his head to face you, greeted by his beautiful girlfriend grinning at him. Bucky inhales deeply, and you try your best not to burst laughing, knowing that he will complain about the things in the book.

“You won’t believe it! She just said she loved him in the last chapter, and now? Do you know? She just kissed his brother; that’s not even a bit cool. They are twins; the brother should be at least nice enough to tell her that she shouldn’t do it when she is with his brother!”

“Doesn’t they both look the same?”

“NOOOO! Her boyfriend has a small scar next to his ear!” Bucky complains, throwing his head back. “And she just kisses his brother. And he didn’t say anything at all.”

You chuckle softly; your hand finds its way to Bucky’s chest, and you slide it up and down, calming him down. He closes his eyes, enjoying the warmth of your hand and the feeling of your soft skin against his broad chest.

“How did they end the side you just read?” You ask softly.

“She pulls away and looks into his eyes,” he explains, looking at you with a sudden, confused expression. “MAYBE SHE FELT IT? OR HE TELLS HER NOW?”

You giggle, but agree with your boyfriend. Maybe Bucky should continue reading before he thinks badly about the characters in the book.

“But they still kissed!”

“Do you want her to look at him to find the scar every time they kiss or are around each other?”

“No, only when the twin is visiting them,” Bucky says, pouting softly.

You lean closer, kissing his pout away. When you pull away from his soft lips, he pouts once more, waiting for you to kiss him again. Such a big guy who is a little puppy when he is around you. You adore him; Bucky is a sweetheart, especially when you’re alone with him. Looking for your warmth, for your touch, and asking for a lot of kisses - even though he doesn’t ask with words, his eyes and his actions are loud enough to tell you what he is looking for. You press your lips against his once more. At this point, his hand slides to your neck and holds you in place until you both need to pull away to breathe heavily. His blue eyes are shining, and he smiles widely before he takes his book and opens it, ready to continue reading to find out if the girl is cheating on her boyfriend. You rest your head back on his shoulder and read more of your own book.

For a while, it’s quiet until Bucky groans again, throwing the book away and crossing his arms in front of his chest. He doesn’t say anything at all, just glancing at the book and narrowing his eyebrows. You giggle softly, but you continue reading your book. He stares at this book for around five minutes before he clears his throat.

“It’s not fun to do a staring contest when the book never needs to blink!” He complains, pouting once again.

“And why did you glance at the book? Did it try to bite you?”

“No! But she knew it was his brother! She kissed him and told him that she wanted to be with him. And her boyfriend heard it all and told her it’s his brother, and she said she knows. And she was just with him together to get closer to his twin.”

You gasp playfully while you hold back your laughter. Bucky, being the grumpy man he is, is even funnier when he complains about a book and its characters.

“It’s just a book, Buck. In my book, they get married without wanting to be married, and they fall in love, but then there is his rival, who asks her out, and she says yes.”

“Those women in books! They can’t keep their dicks in their pants.”

“Nooo- Buck,” you burst out laughing, holding your hands on your belly. “She said yes, because then they would know more about him. But she loves her husband; they both fall in love.”

Bucky groans softly but nods then. Turning his face toward you and leaning closer. His ocean blue eyes dart into yours, and he smirks.

“He is going to fuck her to make sure she knows she belongs to him.”

You shake your head, then you capture his cheeks with your hands and press your lips on his. Bucky grins, moving his lips softly against yours while he pushes you with your back into the mattress. He rolls on top of you and pushes himself slightly up with his arms.

“I show you how much fun it is to get to know who you belong to, Doll.”

You shiver when his voice is suddenly lower, his lips moving softly over your skin, and he smirks at you while he sees the goosebumps he causes with his words and the way he touches you gently and lovingly.

┏━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━┓

𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐑𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨

𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐬.

┗━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━┛

Taglist: @kandis-mom @sergeantbarnessdoll @identity2212 @km-ffluv @lunaalovesyouu @blackhawkfanatic @armystay89 @suz7days @etherealdisneyvillainness @pono-pura-vida @somnorvos @meowmeowyoongles @randomawesomeperson102 @rogersbarber @sebastianstanisahotmf @felicitylemon @cjand10 @bookishtheaterlover7 @lives-in-midgard @casa-boiardi @futurequeen2018-blog @flstrawberry @capsbestgirl77 @nervouseden @jiyascepter @princesscore-angel @mrs-katelyn-barnes @sasha-writing

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wenellyb · 15 hours

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"The BoBs said...."

"BoBs are saying..."

"I can't believe BoBs..."

Who cares about what they're saying?

There's a big problem in the Bucktommy fandom: the fandom is still behaving like Bucktommy is small ship and that we're "against" the Buddie ship that is the big ship.

Historically that was true, but not anymore

Yes, BoBs are the loudest, but they're not the majority.

Bucktommy hasn't been the "smaller ship" since episode 6 aired. Just last week, Bucktommy was in the top 3 most popular ships 2 weeks in a row.

And yet, the Bucktommy tag is filled with posts about stuff anti-Bucktommy shippers said... as if they were the ones setting the tone. They shouldn't be.

Who cares they thought Tommy was being mean? We know that's not true and they also know that's not true, they're just trying to get a recation and it's sad that their strategy works every single time.

#bucktommy #tommy kinard #I know this was about ladt episode and people needed to vent in the tags but I would hate to see this happen anytime b*ddies come up with #a new theory #their ship isn't canon and it's making them angry but we shouldn't be paying this much attention to them

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sabh0 · 3 days

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I need to rant with someone about how this fandom thinks Chuuya's stupid, or gullible, and how Dazai uses him all the time without him even realizing, which hurts Chuuya's feelings like...

What the fuck did y'all read, where did that dynamic even comes from?? Why do you want to make Chuuya look pathetic????

They are PARTNERS. If Dazai only considered him a puppet, they would NOT work so well together, nor have the dynamic they do, they balance each other out while understanding each other completely, PLEASE.

Yes, Chuuya follows Dazai's plans most of the time, because they WORK. When Dazai doesn't give him the entire thing, it's because he trusts Chuuya to understand his intentions anyway, because they know each so well, I am going to SCREAM.

SO TRUE!!! EVERY TIME I SEE PPL CALL CHUUYA STUPID OR SMTH I GO BONKERS,, Asagiri himself said that Chuuya is Dazai level genius,,

And the fact he goes along with Dazai's plans is literally the fact he trusts him?? He literally said it out loud a few times. No idea where ppl r getting that whole thing about him being some pathetic little guy who can't think for himself,, if he didn't want to do something then he wouldn't and that's it 😭😭

The same goes for ppl who make Dazai look like he can't handle himself in a fight or smth,, ghey literally push the dynamic of 'brains and brawn' onto skk like aughh!! Obviously Chuuya is a much better fighter, but Dazai is not a twig that won't be able to lift a finger in a fight??? He does perfectly fine against Atsushi's tiger, running and jumping around,,, or in the Dazai's Entrance Exam novel where he was fighting that big buff guy - obviously he's not a martial artist so it would be quite hard to fight someone twice as big as you, but he still managed to hit him a few times with some tricks,,, also he's pretty athletic considering the way he escaped in the Dragon's Head Conflict (uhh sab u just started yapping sbout a completely different topic))

#sab q&a #seeing skk who r not black and white being forced by the fandom to fit the basic tropes makes me cry #some of yall make them look like they cant do sht without each other bc #'ohh poor chuuya he's stupid he needs dazai to think and poor dazai wont lift a chair he's so badd'#lord #those r complex characters that can work ideally without each other

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angelbarelywrites · 2 days

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♡ slashers scenarios | let’s get kinky (part 2)

♡ fandoms; Friday the 13th, House of Wax, Scream (kinda), Hannibal (TV), Dead by Daylight, slashers (general)

♡ characters; Jason Vorhees, Bo Sinclair, Vincent Sinclair, Danny Johnson, Hannibal Lecter

♡ reader; gender neutral

♡cw; graphic sexual content, kink content, daddy kink (NOT ddlg), blood kink, knife kink

♡notes; i’m alive (ish) !!! i think i forgot how to write but have this

•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•

Jason Vorhees

> he’s a vanilla guy, honestly

> he’s a virgin when you meet and still believes a lot of what his mother taught him

> however, he is eager to please

> so eager to please that with some gentle coaxing, you could get him to try about anything once

> he’s a natural service top- but he’d bottom no questions asked

> in terms of dom and sub dynamics, he fits pretty snugly in the sub category

> but as I said, he’d try anything once, including completely doming you

> and even if he is submissive, the man is tall, wide, and pure muscle

> it’s not hard for him to get rough- sometimes he is without even realizing it

> but the aftercare is always top-notch, he takes care of you the whole rest of the day/night even if it’s not necessary

> funnily enough he thinks oral is pretty scandalous at first, but god he loves when you suck him off, lapping and trying to take all of him even though it’s probably impossible

Bo Sinclair

> maybe listing kinks he doesn’t have would be faster

> in all seriousness, there are quite a few he’d be gunning for when the topic comes up for the first time

> he loves being called daddy or sir, or would accept most other dom titles

> he’s super into roleplay- but he loses the plot pretty fast

> he love love loves tying you up and using you as he pleases

> if you trust him enough he’ll gag you too, and maybe leave you tied up while he goes to take care of business

> he likes spanking and biting and bruising your hips from gripping you too tightly

> and he likes kissing all of the little marks he left for days afterwards

>making sure they heal properly, he always says, though he’s quick to replace them

> if you can manage to get him to sub- big if- he’s an incredibly whiny and desperate brat. but taking him can be fun.

Billy Lenz

> he’s the switch of the century 🔥🔥🔥

> he alternates so frequently between praise and degradation that it’s jarring at times

> “oh just look at my pretty whore- you like billy’s cock? take it like the fucking slut you are—“

> and he loves loves loves being on the receiving end of both as well

> he has an oral fixation, big time. And if your fingers aren’t in his mouth, his fingers are in yours

> and, to no one’s surprise, he loves phone sex

> he’ll call you from the attic as foreplay

> and he loves watching you, peeping through the wall as you put on a show for him

> he loves edging- mostly on the receiving end

> and when he finally cums, he wants it to be all over your face or chest.

Danny Johnson

> borderline exhibitionist. maybe not even borderline.

> y’all are fucking in the car, in alleys, anywhere you can have just enough privacy

> and man oh man, is he going to take so many pictures of you

> posed on the bed or on your knees in front of him or freshly fucked and nearly in tears

> when he has you screaming, he wants to hear his name, not anything else

> he’s a hair puller, and he’s more than happy to choke you

> if you ask nicely, that is. he’ll have you beg for most things

> he calls you his kitty or puppy, or baby doll if you don’t like either of those

> if you stroke his ego and praise him, he’ll do absolutely anything you want

> he’ll even be a good boy and bottom for you if he trusts you enough - though he’s an absolute pillow prince when he does bottom

Hannibal Lecter

> debatably the “worst” of the bunch

> he’s the type to really commit to BDSM dynamics

> you WILL call him master, and he’ll probably call you “my pet”

> he likes choking, spanking, the whole nine yards that a lot of the other

> but he very much has a knife kink, and a blood kink. he likes giving little nicks and lapping the blood up, getting a proper taste of you

> of course he can live without it, but if you let him indulge you’d be greatly rewarded

> and even with his strictly dominant nature, he is a very generous master

> he loves going down on you, and he loves overstimulating you when he does

> he’ll have you whining before he gets past your thighs, seeming to always know just what to do make you squirm

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outlanderskin · 12 hours

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Why are you so fucking calm????

Are you asking this in relation to the last paparazzi walk or in general😅🤣? I think that time in this fandom may give me another perspective because the only feeling I have is "I've seen this movie before." I think Sam (and Cait's) actions have no impact beyond the Outlander bubble. The fans who care about them are Outlander fans, to the general public they are unknown, at most "that actor/actress who played that character x in that filme Y". None of the people outside that bubble care if he's seen with anyone. A person outside the bubble who looks at that photo, even knowing the girl's profession, won't see anything unusual, because for that person, Sam is just a single guy who is an actor and doesn't have to live according to anyone beliefs. Mind you, he was not seen on the street beating a woman, an animal, or a child. He was not photographed or filmed committing any crime. Coldly analyzing (from outside the bubble) what you see in these articles is a single guy (that's what you find about him on social media) walking hand in hand down the street with a woman. The woman's profession would be no one's business. Those outside the bubble won't even bother to research, and even if critics, directors, and bosses in general do research or know that she works as an escort, this won't be considered a scandal. Firstly because (publicly) he is single and being single if he wants to have a serious relationship with her (regardless of her profession) is not a crime and it would be considered prejudice and puritanism to boycott someone for that. And secondly, because we are talking about the world of entertainment and let's be realistic: it is a sexist world, dominated by men and where married men involved in cheating scandals, continue to work and earn loads of money and the excuse they use is "that's his private life, not his professional life." I know the impact of these things on the fandom is huge, but it's always just here. Remember Hawaiigate? Even something so serious that it had to be handled with him making public statements (and her distracting the fandom) didn't have a big impact on his business or his career. The only impact it made was some fans who stopped following and supporting him, but those numbers were replaced in the following months by new fans and look at the numbers today.

I've said many times that I don't idolize them both and I don't expect them to make choices based on what I believe. I've also said a thousand times that I think their choices regarding this circus are terrible. But it doesn't impact me emotionally like it impacts some people in the fandom in general (on all sides). My advice is always the same: if it's causing you pain, if it's too much for you to bear, if it affects your real life, walk away. This is just a fandom. It's not your job, your family. Even the circles of friends you make in a fandom (the real friendships) can be maintained if you decide to leave. Just remember to respect the friends that remain, not to think of yourself as superior because you "found the light" and decided to leave, and friendships can continue beautifully.

As for me, so far, all their bad choices only contribute more and more to what I believe. That's why I'm here with my popcorn in hand, always waiting for the next show and remembering that the only actions and reactions I can control are my own. And, that's OK.

#outlander #samcait #shipping #sam heughan #fandom is for fun #thehardlifeofshippers #welcome to the shitshow

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lumea-art · 1 day

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Hey, guys! I'd like to address a personal issue which actually concerns everyone in this fandom. Please, read and react somehow🙏 For those on the bojere fanbook server, that's going to be pretty much the same as what you read yesterday. If I'm too direct or accidentally overshare, sorry, keep in mind that I'm autistic

So for quite a long time I felt secretly disliked in the fandom. I am a very anxious person, I hang on every piece of feedback that I get so it bothered me a lot. I wasn't allowed to participate in the Käärijä zine and they never explained why and I almost didn't get in the bojere fanbook as well but at least the mods were kind enough to communicate the issue

So the mods told me yesterday that people felt uncomfortable about me taking part in this and having me on the server. I felt very down the whole day and didn't understand shit until Moko and Due gave me the explanation. The issue was "radfem" in my bio on Twitter. They explained to me how my associating with radfem made them think I was potentially threatening to other people on the server, especially the queer folk. But the thing is I turned out to be quite different. I consider myself to be radfem cause I've had a lot of traumatic experience with men (SA, abusive relationship), I don't want any other women to go through something like I had to experience, I am with women, I'm fighting for our comfort and against the patriarchy. Also I am from Kazakhstan and we have big issues with women's rights here including all kinds of abuse and femicide for which men tend to not get in jail. You might have heard how our ex minister of Economics abused and k*lled his wife and didn't get in jail until the case reached the news. That's all, that's what it means TO ME to be radfem. So I guess this radfem is different to the one you're used to. I am not transphobic and I have never thought my views had anything to do with queer people. I have always been nothing but respectful towards queer people, online or irl. I have nonbinary friends who are comfortable with communicating with me. As a cis person, I may not understand something, but we tend to talk anything through in order to understand each other better, not waiting for any of us get hurt accidentally. So I suggest the same - if you need further clarification, you can ask me questions in reblog or dms and I'll answer. Also I'm open to literature suggestions to get to understand you guys better💕

Also regarding Russian-Ukranian issue in case anyone has a problem with it

Since I'm openly Russian speaking (though being from Kazakhstan and half Ukrainian myself), Ukrainians might have an issue with me and I perfectly understand why so I try not to bother them. However, some of them didn't want to leave me and my friends alone. You might have seen this big Russian-Ukranian fight on twitter in April, mostly taking place in JO fandom. The thing is that (again) people don't dig deep and assume I am pro Russian since I speak Russian and happen to not be able to speak Ukrainian or Kazakh (in Kazakhstan we mostly speak Russian). Me and my Russian speaking friends were bullied, our personal info was leaked without our permission and one of us got threatened to be physically hurt once she arrives to a JO gig we are all going to. Of course I protected my friends and myself, maybe not in the best way possible. Luckily, we were able to talk everything through with the guys and no one means to hurt anyone anymore. I suggested doing commissions for donations and I still do that if you're interested. I am pro Ukrainian and pro Palestinian and genocides suck

If someone doesn't want to communicate with me for whatever reason, just don't, what's the problem. But don't limit a person before clarifying things, I beg you. Please, I really want to be on good terms with everyone. I wish peace to everyone 🙏

#the tags are to attract attention #käärijä #joker out #bojan cvjetićanin #jere pöyhönen #bojere

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pilferingapples · 2 days

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I was just reading the "Enjolras and his lieutenants" chapter and I noticed that Enjolras used the informal you for both Courfeyrac and Jehan, but not for Feuilly. Would you happen to know the historical/language reasons as to why that is? I thought it may be because both are students and where I'm from, students use the informal you, even if they don't know each other. But Bossuet addressed Marius with the formal you when they first met, so I'm not sure if that really is the reason for that. Does it mean that canonically, they aren't as close as Enjolras is with the others or could there be another reason for it? Also, do you know why he still only adresses them by their last names, even though he's using the informal you?

Nonny you are asking me about one of the Great Questions of the Novel: what the heck is going on with Feuilly and the t/v distinctions?

I am not going to dive into the weeds of standard t/v use,but --along with all the usual applications, in canon era and especially the kind of social circles that Hugo knew best and is setting up for the Amis, " tu" seems to have been common for young men to use together (a) with friends from childhood (b) among certain groups of Romantics , Because Romantic Friendship (c) particularly relevant here , among certain republican groups, because of the implied equality of everyone using it. Cosette will reference this use later:

And obviously all of this only makes Enjolras vous-ing Feuilly weirder!

And complicating the theorizing, Enjolras does use Tu for Feuilly later on, during his big barricade speech:

Écoute-moi, toi Feuilly, vaillant ouvrier, homme du peuple, hommes des peuples. Je te vénère.

I have no solid answer, only theories! Theory 1: Feuilly is, somehow, fairly new to the group in Lieutenants. Counterargument: then why is he already one of the Lieutenants? And in what seems to be a particularly Secret secret meeting with ONLY the Lieutenants in attendance?

Theory 2: Maybe Feuilly's much older than we generally estimate , enough to make the Tu seem less automatic? The later use of tu at the barricades seems to argue against that, but maybe that's a special " we're all fighting and about to die" level of intimacy, since Tu does seem to be in general use there? Counterargument: hugo refers to them all being Young so very, very often, and ok that seems to include Up To Maybe 35, but still. Feuilly's part of their age cohort by all other signs.

Theory 3, Not Very Satisfying but Realistic: Hugo's bein' weird. Hugo personally used Vous for almost everyone, unless they were either direct family or , to be blunt, someone he was having an affair with. He definitely used Vous in friendships most anyone else would have considered a definite Tu situation. Maybe Hugo had an idea about it that he didn't flesh out; maybe he just wrote that and didn't catch it in edits; maybe his handwriting there was just really especially awful and whoever did the Clean Copy that day * didn't transcribe it right and no one later down the line saw it as a typo. Mundane, unrelated to the narrative reasons.

Counterargument: none ,really, except it's kinda boring.:P

Theory X (silly fandom only theory) : Enjolras and Feuilly are trying to act like they are on more formal terms , for shenanigans reasons. Maybe they're working on their Cover for a Secret Mission. Maybe they're trying to hide the fact they've started dating.

As for the Last Name thing, it's just how some people , especially men, are? I don't know that it really needs more explanation, but by all means tell me if you've got a theory! Personally I've always liked " Everyone is named Jean (so they default to last names) XD

usually, but not always, Juliette Drouet

#thank you Nonny!!#sorry for the delay. my cats are VERY Helpful today #Feuilly talk #hey nonny nonny

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lover-of-mine · 2 days

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I think this fandom needs to understand that we are all allowed to like and dislike and resonate and not resonate and enjoy and not enjoy plotlines and characters and ships for literally whatever reason? Everything is being dealt with in extremes and this is nuts in a fandom that used to be somewhat reasonable this time last year. Everything is homophobic or racist or because of some deep lack of moral or fucked up sense of morality. You like that joke? Great. You don't like that joke? Also great. You love that character? Awesome. You hate that ship? You do you, boo. Why is everyone taking everything as a personal attack? Somehow not liking Tommy is inherently homophobic and anti lgbt no matter the reasoning you may have. Sometimes a character doesn't resonate. Sometimes spending time in this fandom getting called homophobic because a ship is not for you is what makes you hate a character. Sometimes this stupid show does stupid things and people have different reactions to it. How much someone enjoys a character or ship shouldn't be something that's making you point out some big moral flaw. But attacking someone for not liking them sure as fuck is.

#god i cant handle this anymore #911 #thoughts thoughts thoughts

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nekropsii · 3 days

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i think theres a really big issue in the community specifically surrounding the people who headcanon dave as some sort of trans where both sides of the coin seem to hate each other? like both sides are at fault here, ive seen blogs demeaning people who like transmasc dave and then like you said other people just completely disregarding transfem dave. guys. can we stop. let people headcanon what they want without blatantly attacking them, this goes for all parties in this issue. i dont get why people act like this. the fuck happened to all trans people being equal and then we get both transmisoginy and harassment of people liking either of the trans headcanons?

jesus man. im tired of it

Respectfully, I do not think this is a “Both Sides” situation.

The concept of transmasc Dave is objectively one of the most popular headcanons in the Homestuck fandom, and it has been for years. I think I can excuse people who headcanon transfem Dave for “hating it”, because as I have been trying to fucking say this entire time, people keep correcting me on my own posts about transfem Dave on my own blog, and belittling me for thinking this way. And since I’ve asked people to maybe interrogate why they feel the need to correct me and patronize me and to stop fucking doing that, I’ve been getting inundated with people trying to mansplain and traumadump to me how me saying to not correct me and patronize me for having a transfem headcanon is oppressing them and that trans men also have it bad, as if I literally ever insinuated that they do not have it tough.

You do not get to “Both Sides” me on a discussion about my experience when I have never - and I mean NEVER - received this level of heat for headcanoning a character as literally anything else. I have NEVER gotten “corrected” for headcanoning a character as gay, or transmasculine, or black, or a lesbian - only now, when I headcanon a character as a trans woman, am I getting people correcting me, condescending me, telling me some really fucking personal traumas to explain to me I’m “in the wrong” for being upset about the correction and condescension, very obviously making assumptions about my sex, gender, and what I’ve been through in my life, making negative assumptions about my intelligence, and putting a fuck ton of words in my mouth.

I am speaking from my own experience here. I am sorry if that hurts anyone’s feelings, but that much cannot be taken from me. From my experience, this is not “Both Sides”, this is very clearly one side with far greater numbers giving another flack for not assimilating, and when that other side tries to say what’s going on, they’re treated as an aggressor, and treated like a petulant idiot child.

Before anyone puts any more words in my god damn mouth:

I literally never said no one could HC Dave as transmasculine, or that they were wrong for thinking that way. I have outright said the opposite, that it is fine and that I do not care. HOWEVER, I sure as hell am experiencing people telling me that I am wrong for HCing her as a woman.

I literally never, and I mean NEVER, said or insinuated that trans men do not suffer, especially under the patriarchy. I am not an idiot, I know how the patriarchy works, it hurts literally everyone that doesn’t conform to an incredibly, incredibly narrow white non-queer cishetero male ideal. I am also not an idiot, I know that transphobia will exist no matter what you identify as, and it will suck absolute horseshit. Neither “side” has it “easy”, every type of transphobia has an uncomfortably, terrifyingly high body count. I never fucking said trans men do not have it hard. Stop putting those words in my mouth.

Literally all I said was that it’s fucking weird that I’ve never been treated this way until I headcanoned a character as a trans woman, and maybe to interrogate that because people sure seem comfortable acting this way, and that-

This is Transmisogyny.

And if there’s anything else I’ve learned from this, it’s that-

HIT DOGS HOLLER.

#homestuck #cw transphobia #cw transmisogyny #nekro.sms

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fruitybowl · 2 days

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Okay okay so I'm gonna be talking about something I don't normally talk about but I just need to ramble.

The way the She Ra fandom treats the show (specifically the part that's obsessed with the horde kids) is really weird. Like look...would I have liked to see more of the horde kids? Yes absolutely. I think their relationship with each other and Adora could have been interesting to explore but I'm okay they didn't. Because guess what? The show isn't about them. The way people talk about the horde kids makes it seem like they were integral parts of the story that weren't utilized effectively, but they weren't at all??? Like they're barely in the show apart from a few few minute cameos in some episodes or just in the background, and that one episode in season 4 where they had a B plot. That's about it. They are not nearly as important to the story as Adora, Catra, Bow and Glimmer, and even Hordak. The reason the show doesn't focus on Adora's relationship with the horde kids is because her relationship with Catra is the focus! And arguably the most important relationship in the show. And onto the treatment of Kyle in the show and by the creators. Yes I think Kyle deserves better and a break, but I think people are being a little dramatic when talking about him. Now again, Kyle is not exploring as in-depth as the other characters so I don't think it's fair to give his treatment by the show and writers the same weight as said characters. I truly don't believe that the treatment of Kyle reflects on how the writers are as people I just don't 😂. Yes he's a punching bag...but almost every show has one. Now if he was as prominent in the story as Adora or Catra and was still treated the same then I would be concerned. But that's if they poked fun at parts of his character that were formed from abuse, and I don't believe they would do that. If Kyle was part of the cast they would have written him with the same amount of care that they did with the other characters. I have a hard time believing the same people that wrote Catra, one of the most complex and interesting characters in the show, would treat Kyle's story with any less care because he's a scrawny white guy (and yes I have seen people make the argument that Kyle is treated so harshly by the writers because he's white which is...quite ridiculous in my opinion.)

People also seem to forget how BIG the main cast is. There are already so many characters to explore that it would have been very hard for them to explore the horde kids more than just surface level. It would have made the show too busy in my opinion. And ONCE AGAIN the horde kids are not the main characters, so we shouldn't expect them to be treated like it. If you want the horde kids to be explored.more, then read fanfiction...or write it yourself.

Anyway I'm done rambling now. If you have anything else to add to this then feel free to. I'd be happy to discuss this more

#spop kyle #she ra #she ra horde kids #horde kids #she ra lonnie #she ra kyle #she ra rogelio #she ra catra #she ra adora

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theflyindutchwoman · 2 days

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Hello! I love your blog and seeing all the things you post, so I wanted to share this really cool chenford/the rookie related thing that happened to me at work yesterday. I am a hairstylist and most of my work is men’s cuts, yesterday a customer had come in wanting his usual haircut ( for reference I work in a walk in only based salon that keeps clients notes in the computer where clients have the option for going to first available stylist or selecting a specific stylist) he is waiting for the next available (me) I call his name take him back to my station and ask ( most notes are also vague because we do a lot of cuts like 400-450 a week as a salon) are we still doing the skin fade with a trim on top and he says yes, and I ask ok how do you like to style the top… and this man says to me do you watch the rookie? I want it like SERGEANT BRADFORD and the biggest smile came over my face as it took everything in me to not immediately freak out and fan girl over someone finally asking me for Tim’s haircut absolute highlight of my very busy long ass day. I quietly said yes I love that show Tim and Lucy are my favorites and he smiles and giggles a little. Also this Man was like 6’3 or something super kind slouched in his chair before I even asked ( I’m 5’2) and as the hair cut went on we talked about the show and his life and how he really enjoys the rookie especially because of Bradford and how real and relatable his character is. This guy we will call him JP is a retired marine and struggled a lot after coming back home and didn’t really have a supportive family but eventually got the help he needed now has a family of his own and doing pretty well for himself and I just thought it was amazing what he was able to get out of this show. But also as someone who does hair watching tv is like 85% of the time being distracted by the characters hair and haircuts, I’ve been staring at Tim’s hair for 6 years lol did that cut in like 20-30 minutes with wash and style I wish I could have taken a picture but he loved the cut that’s all that matters and it was a great irl experience with another the rookie fan!

Sorry this was so long hah just wanted to share some positive stuff in the fandom also Eric is amazing and I just want to cut his hair hahah and also a big thank you to JP for letting/trusting me to do his hair.

THIS IS THE MOST WHOLESOME THING EVER! The way this has put a smile on my face since reading your anecdote… I just love this. Thank you so much for sharing it ᡣ𐭩 This also reminds me of something Eric said last season. If I remember correctly, a fan asked him about his hair after noticing that it was getting a bit shorter in 5b… and Eric confirmed that it was on purpose : he let his hair grow to show Tim's softer side and cut it in time for Metro, as a symbol of his military/TO past (and stricter side). I just love the attention to details.

Thank you for this amazing story, Anon :)

#ask & ye shall receive #the rookie #chenford #tim bradford

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flower-boi16 · 2 days

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I find Blitz unbearable sometimes. I know it's only two seasons but throughtout the series he learned so many things yet everything still sets back to zero and he never changed from day one. This miserable man drowned in his past for so long that he can never grow. His trauma is his character. It's so boring man the same shit happened over and over with him crying about his exes, friends and family. I know about his current relasionship with Fizz now but I want this dude to change too not just Fizz.

Personally I dont really hate Blitz as a character. Of all the characters in HB he’s the one that season 2 hasn’t completely ruined. He is actually fairly interesting as a character, but some other people have already talked about the depths of his character so I won’t go into it here.

That being said, I really think the issue with Blitz is less about the character himself and more how the show seems to treat him, mainly in regards to Stolitz. Season 1 directly paints Stolas as the one abusing Blitz in the relationship (as it should), making it seem like the show is taking Blitz’s side here, that he has a right to be mad at Stolas and cut him out.

But then season 2 comes along and suddenly the victim and abuser roles are SWAPPED. Now the show is painting Blitz as the one in the wrong for “not loving Stolas” even though he has every reason to hate him, while Stolas is portrayed as nothing but an UwU soft boy. I’ve talked about this before but the show demonizes all the people that Stolas has hurt in some way, and it does this as an artificial way to make him look more sympathetic but painting the characters calling him out on his shit as in the wrong.

Blitz next to Octavia gets the worst of this, both in the show and the fandom. The Circus directly tries to frame Blitz as in the wrong because he apparently was the one who gave Stolas the wrong idea of the relationship, but that fails because that doesn’t somehow change the fact that Stolas is coercing Blitz into sleeping with him, and Stolas should be the one to accept that his delusions of Blitz loving him aren’t gonna be true.

Plus the line with Stolas saying that Blitz was his “first ever friend” feels like a major case of the writing guilt tripping Blitz into having sex with him for Stolas’s pleasure. Oops then tries further to paint Blitz as in the wrong by gaslighting him by having Fizz say “oh, you just hate him for being a prince”, and by then trying to make Blitz look like an asshole for not loving Stolas because Stolas did “so many nice things for him”…of screen, and “he cares for him!!”

This ALSO fails because just because Stolas did some nice things for Blitz OFF-SCREEN and cares about him doesn't somehow mean that Blitz has no reason to get mad at Stolas for once again, sexually abusing him. And yes, that is what Stolas is doing. Plus, none of these "nice things" lined up with any of their interactions in season 1 COMBINED with them happening off-screen, and it makes it feel like a retcon. They can victimize and UwUify Stolas all they want and portay Blitz as a big meanie UwU but it won't change anything.

Nothing will ever change the fact that Stolas is sexually abusing Blitzo, and Blitz has EVERY REASON to dislike him for doing that, NOT TO MENTION him BELLITTLING Blitz in season 1 constantly. YET the show demonizes him. And guess what? The demonization is only gonna get WORSE based on the trailer, where we litteraly have Stolas singing in front of a sign that says "Blitzo sucks", and the line "do ever feel any kind of remorse for what you do" which is said by Stolas.

It's so funny to me how fans will call US media illiterate for not understanding the "nuances" and "complexities" of this reletionship, yet they demonize Blitz and coddle Stolas, ignoring the things Stolas actually did to Blitz like the fact that he....ya know...constantly bellittles and is sexually abusing him, and getting mad at Blitz for "hurting Stolas' feelings". Meanwhile, we're actually the ones taking note of these things and rightfully pointing out that OBJECTIVELY, Stolas is the abuser here, nothing the show can do can change that and I am SICK of the fandom having this braindead idea that Blitz is somehow in the wrong for not loving Stolas. Because he's not. He's REALLY not. No amount of mental gymnastics can somehow change that.

#vivziepop critical #hazbin hotel critical #vivziepop criticism #helluva boss critical #helluva boss criticism #anti stolas #anti stolitz #I also don't think season 2 is handling his plotline of making amends with the people he's hurt so far but that's a topic for another day #this post got long enough already #Blitzo deserves better

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fourthclone · 3 days

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upon further thought and discussing my current feelings with a friend, i think that for rn the healthiest thing for me to do is to go on a short indefinite hiatus instead of a semi-hiatus.

vent/a bit of where i’m at atm - it IS rp related so feel free to skip. TLDR im taking an emotional and mental health break for my own sanity.

i think that it’s safe to say that i’ve been struggling for a long while in this fandom? and this has been going on since 2020. and while i won’t go into explicit details about my feelings and what ive experienced bc it is a lot and i don’t want my negativity all over the dash, it gets very exhausting trying to portray this character as one who deserves his place in the final fantasy vii compilation as a whole just as much as any other character. it hurts a lot feeling like i somehow have to prove that.

and it has hurt to have people come into my hc posts in the past to complain about retcons as if i somehow had something to do with them by simply applying what’s been shown to me in remake and rebirth. i’ve always tried my best to be respectful to pre-established content, and i’ve always tried to incorporate roche in a way that does not directly contradict previously established lore. i understand the frustration. but my passionate headcanon posts about my muse are not a space for you to vent your frustrations about how -square enix- has retconned SOLDIER lore. i’m trying to make sense of it myself.

yet there are times where i do feel as though i’m encroaching on people’s fond memories of the original compilation by writing this character, and if you think i’m being sensitive about it, i don’t feel like i am completely irrational in feeling this way. this has been happening since 2020, and it’s tiring always having that in the back of my head, to the point where i sincerely approached one of my friends far prior to rebirth to tell them i wasn’t going to go along w this blog because simply put, i just didn’t want to put up w that again - i feel welcomed most of the time - but lore-wise and universe-wise, only to a certain extent at times.

however, i also realize that this is a severe discredit and slap in the face to people who have been nothing but kind to me and i am immensely grateful for that. fandom is a lot better than it was in 2020. it was absolute chaos back then. and the people who have been kind and receptive to this muse and who have been respectful VASTLY outweigh those who have not been.

and so i’m writing this to acknowledge that because i’m seeing a consistent pattern of hyperfocus on the wrong things ( likely because fandom as a whole has slowed down and so has my energy levels, giving me too much room to ruminate ) , the best course of action is to take a complete step back, despite me loving this character utterly. i think it will make me feel a lot better to take some time to focus on other things and keep my mind off negative thoughts. come back with a better perspective. i don’t want to sully this blog with bad vibes or. somehow appearing like sb who wants to be pitied or comforted all the time. when the bad feelings get too big, its simply time to take a step back.

i profusely apologize for my emotionally unstable behavior as of late, so i’ll be taking a step back for my own mental wellbeing. i am not certain when i’ll be back, but i am hoping it won’t take long. at least. i don’t plan on this becoming a lengthy thing longer than a month. i will keep you guys posted.

i am open to discord roleplays via discord at mooglerific. i will be focusing exclusively on tohru adachi for a while over at @infog, albeit on a semi-hiatus level.

i appreciate you guys greatly! stay safe!

#⚡ ⸺ ❝ hear ye ; hear ye ! [ psa ]#⚡ ⸺ ❝ moghome . [ ooc ]

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alpaca-clouds · 1 day

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I really do not understand it

I know, this topic is probably gonna be the neverending evergreen of this fandom, but I really do not get it. Why do some people honestly do believe that Ascending Astarion is "good"? Like they honestly believe that this is good for him, because "he wants it" and stuff. While the game makes it so very clear that mentally Astarion is off far worse after ascending, compared to him being a vampire spawn in the end. Spawn Astarion heals after the end - or starts healing at the very least - while Ascended Astarion only gets worse.

Like everyone else I will say: If having the big evil vampire dom is your kinda kink or fantasy... All power to you. We all can enjoy a good dark romance when it is fiction. I am not talking about people, who just like the Ascension ending for the drama or the sexual thrills. I am really talking about those, who keep claiming that it is Astarion's good ending.

The argument usually boils down to: "But it is, what he wants!" Which just... makes me wonder. Is the issue a lack of media literacy, a lack of empathy, or a lack of general understanding on how abuse victims think?

Let me put it like this: A drug addict might know that drugs are bad for them, and yet they will plead you for more drugs, when the withdrawel kicks in.

Astarion is like this in a way. He does know, that ascending is bad for him. He knows it the entire time. If you really press him on it, you can see his doubt. But he is afraid. He is so afraid of becoming a victim again. If not Cazador's victim, then the victim of someone else. So he wants this power to secure himself - but he knows that it is not good for him.

If you really press him on it before, he is actually fairly easy to talk down from it during the ritual. Even if you romance him (which generally makes the "talking him down" part a lot harder).

And we know that if you are in a relationship and he ascends, he starts to become controlling towards you - just like Cazador had been towards him. And we do know that on the long run, he does not even go out into the sun anymore, because he becomes too enarmored with political power play and stuff.

And of course there is the choking kiss animation with Ascended Astarion. (Once again, if that's your kink, all power to you - but you gotta admit, that this is pretty much the creators being like: "Uhm, he is bad now.")

The creators really tried to make sure that it is clear how this really is the bad ending for him.

The game is very much about breaking out of generational abuse. By stopping oneself of becoming the next abuser. Which is why Astarion ascending is really bad.

#baldur's gate 3 #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #astarion #astarion ancunin #ascended astarion #vampire spawn astarion #astarion x tav #tavstarion #astarion x durge #durgestarion #media literacy

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hauntedgrin · 2 days

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An unnecessarily thorough analysis of the Tarot imagery in Merlin Season One by an amateur tarot reader

(who is also a hopeless romantic and is currently very affected by the disaster that is BBC Merlin)

I started watching Merlin around two months ago. I fell in love with the show instantly, even if I technically haven't finished it yet because of time reasons (though I did spoil myself everything right to the ending and I’m devastated. Still trying to find courage to start season 5. But that’s beside the point)

There was something in the first season that caught my eye and hasn't let me go since. In fact, I was thinking about it today, went on a search for discussions about it, fully under the assumption that this is something the fandom noticed long beforehand is a well-known fact. To my endless surprise, I’ve found no mention! Nada! Not a single one. That won’t do, I thought. I have to share with the people. It's something that fueled my conviction in Merlin the Show being a love story between Merlin and Arthur (whatever the nature of that love may be, I love both the platonic and romantic interpretation equally, though this specific instance could be leaning towards romance somewhat more, I'll explain it in a second) and here it is.

It's this scene.

It is Merlin and Arthur, facing each other with two cups in between them, trying to decide who is going to drink the poison, sacrifice himself and save the other. And I thought Oh my god, tarot symbolism.

That's the card, the Two of Cups. The similarities are obvious (and, in my opinion, very intentional. I’d like to kiss whoever came up with this specific creative decision)

Slight disclaimer: Tarot reading can be very subjective, meanings shift depending on the reader and their perception of the card. I’ll try to be objective with the main aspects of the cards, but there is a lot of subjective opinions too. It’s okay if you disagree)

The main meanings of this card are partnerships, loving relationships, mutual attraction, unity, harmony and, you guessed it!, soulmates. It’s not hard to see why that card would have been chosen to represent them. I think that’s the most outright the show’s ever been about calling them soulmates, without hiding behind labels such as ‘each other’s destiny’ and ‘two sides of one coin’ as if those are any less gay. There is also themes of equality and becoming one, mutual respect and, in certain cases passion and sexual attraction (though it’s not a definition that is applicable in all cases, and can absolutely be ignored for platonic or asexual relationships, it’s still one of the main aspects, given that its represented by, you know, the big red head of a lion with wings right at the top of the card. Can’t exactly forget about it.)

Personally I've always preferred the Two of Cups to The Lovers tarot card (which looks very similar and has some intersections in themes, also concerning love, intimacy, passion). Plus, The Lovers is part of the Major Arcana, so technically it should be more impactful, ‘epic’, someone said, divine. While doing some research into that distinction I've found why exactly it makes me a bit queasy. The Lovers are not always a card about love, in fact, more often it isn’t. And The Lovers aren't made for each other. That is to say, they obviously are, considering the entirety transparent Adam and Eve imagery (and this also makes it a more conservative card, with clear molds for a ‘traditional relationship’). The Lovers are brought together by a higher power, made for a purpose. It serves something. It is a message. It is a lesson. It's a choice between what you want and what you need. It is a partnership, often intense, out of this world, but it’s also about all the factors in between, the things that unite them, the snake, the temptation, the apple, the garden. It can be also about soulmates, and happy relationships, of course, about fated lovers… and mortal enemies. It actually is more in line with Merlin’s and Morgana’s relationship. Out of this world fated connection? Absolutely, guaranteed. Do you want that kind of connection though, really?

How is this relevant, you might be thinking?

Well, there is no such divine power pushing the couple portrayed by the Two of Cups. In fact, they are choosing each other. It’s only them and their union. That’s why I like it so much. They are only the way they are, not the way they are meant to be, not specifically made for each other and yet they are right for each other anyway. And, somehow, just being them is enough. Is that not love?

In Merlin we are told that Merlin and Arthur are a part of each other’s destiny. The Once and Future King and Emrys, his protector, uniting Albion, prophesized by some unnamed seer(s). Does not seem very much like a choice, does it? I guess it depends on the way you view the prophecy and destiny in the show. Is it really all inevitable, and destiny is set in stone, unable to be changed, all leading to the same end, no matter what you do? Or is it the choices themselves that are the constants, fixed in place by the prophecy fulfilling itself? I think the answers to those questions are entirely up to each viewer, and that we can only speculate on it, and never know for sure which was it. Maybe there isn’t a right answer at all. But what I do know is there was a choice Merlin and Arthur made. Let’s return to the imagery on the card..

The couple is exchanging the cups. They are not just toasting – they are performing a ritual, a ceremony. Like exchanging rings, like giving vows. It’s a promise, it’s a connection, it’s a new step, it’s a commitment. And the parallels of the scene in 1x11 don’t end with just imagery. Merlin and Arthur complete the ritual! In the show!

In the episode 1x04, The Poisoned Chalice, Merlin starts the ritual by drinking from Arthur’s poisoned goblet, which he does to protect him. I would also like to add that this is the first time Two Cups appear that season (that's twice they used the imagery), notably, two ceremonial goblets that are supposed to symbolize peace and partnership between two kingdoms. Even if it doesn’t represent the actual state of the two kingdoms, it definitely shows King Bayard’s genuine desire for a peaceful alliance. And Merlin drinks from one of them!

Merlin drinks poison for Arthur and in Labyrinth of Gedref, Arthur drinks ‘poison’ for Merlin in turn. Very unconventional way to get married, I must say, but it’s remarkable that they do it in the same way (even if not at the same time).

So. What does all of that tell us about Merlin and Arthur?

We’ve established that the card signifies a very close, strong and significant relationship, chosen by both parties. Again, I like that it emphasizes the choice, that they didn’t just fall into the friendship because of destiny (even if it aided them). The Two of Cups is a part of the Minor Arcana, which deals with the every day matters, earthly lives. Is that not fitting? Merlin didn’t choose The Once and Future King, he chose Arthur, and Arthur didn’t choose Emrys, he chose Merlin.

Merlin’s who been promised a peaceful future. A land where magic is free. Merlin, who knows what’s supposed to happen: The Once and Future King brings that future. The King dies. Merlin, who has a choice to bring that future. To save Mordred. To remove the ban on magic. He doesn’t choose that, he chooses to essentially destroy that future entirely, just so he can have Arthur.

Arthur, who values Merlin’s opinion above everyone else’s, Arthur on his deathbed, finally seeing Merlin for who he is, says, “I don’t want you to change, I want you to always be you,” Arthur, who is dying, a few steps from the chance being saved, (still too far, not enough time), decides to stop because in his last moments he just wants to be held by Merlin.

They chose each other.

And that’s, dare I say it, love.

#why HASNT anyone mentioned this before #if someone has please tell me #i wrote this while running a fever if this is incoherent thats why #im scrared to put tarot tags in so i wont #merlin meta #merlin and arthur #merlin analysis #merlin bbc #merlin #bbc merlin #merthur

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lorei-writes · 2 days

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You seem genuinely nice in your curiosity, so I thought I'd share my thoughts. Maybe this is not the right approach to how to go about interacting on tumblr, but if I notice that there's a blog that I've interacted with somewhat frequently (whether it be liking/reblogging their posts, sending requests when requests are open, etc) and then I notice that interaction is one-sided (either they don't follow me back, they never ever like or reblog my posts and I see them interacting with many others in fandom so I know they are active), I dunno, but I get the feeling they don't like me or my posts, maybe I post too many spoilers, maybe I flood the tags and my posts are annoying or some other third unknown option - and then it snowballs and I worry I'm annoying others with my comments or reblogs or whatever. And I slow my interaction with others out of fear of not being liked or just plain shyness. And sometimes I have unfollowed them. Because, again, I dunno, but I feel like if they don't want to interact with me, perhaps I should not interact with them? When those posts come across my feed because reblogged by a mutual, I will sometimes read/look at if a suitor I like, but when I see who the op is, I become hesitant with interacting, and end up not interacting at all.

I know, devil's advocate - what if this blogger who didn't interact with me has never seen my blog or any of my posts. That might fly in Genshin or HSR fandoms, but not Ikemen. I think by now most everyone knows each other around here (at least those who have been posting for a while and post regularly/frequently). And I'm not the only one who has experienced this...

Thank you for listening to my rambling.

Thank you for sharing your experience!

Hmm... I must admit, Anon, what you've said has left me somewhat conflicted. I can agree that reaching out to a person repeatedly and the effort not being reciprocated can be disheartening. I do think that in this situation it is reasonable to adjust either your expectations ("I know they may not say anything back, but I did enjoy their work regardless, so I will share it." // no expectations of friendship, interacting with posts for the sake of posts alone) or the amount you give out ("I want to have some relationship with this person and they do not reciprocate, therefore I will decrease the amount of effort I put into this." // expectations of friendship, interactions as means of building relationships).

I can tell you that I do not know of a blogger who hasn't appreciated familiar faces in their notification. (Which isn't to devalue your experience. Maybe you met an outlier, maybe this person simply couldn't show it due to their personal circumstances, maybe they thought they showed it and a mismatch in terms of expectations occurred). I can tell you they shouldn't be taken for granted. But I also can tell you that, in some cases, which I do not know whether they are relevant to you, it is simply impossible to give back to everybody.

My experience is what I know best, so allow me to use that as an example. There's over a thousand people following this blog. I do not know all of you. More than this, I do not know all of the creators in the Ikemen Fandom. When I was primarily into Sen, I had no idea who was creating for Pri and was rather surprised to find out that some of those people were considered "big", as I went entirely without ever seeing their names. Even now that I have been invested into Pri for a year, I still find people I have never heard about before... And I still meet people who have no clue who I am or what I do. Likewise, Villains is a fog for me... As I would suspect the "old fandom" may be for you. So, I don't agree with the "most everyone knows each other around here (at least those who have been posting for a while and post regularly/frequently)" statement.

That aside, sometimes it is unfortunate, but it is simply impossible to give back to everybody. And it does suck. Just, hm... I suppose I'd like you to see me now, as it's something I've been struggling with and had to make my peace about? There is only one me. If "just" a hundred of people appear at any given time, or "just" fifty, it is still more than I can reasonably handle. My friendships with people who moved fandoms haven't dissolved and there are only so many relationships I can support. Reliably replying to everything here? I try. But I know I generally can't give back as much as I've received, or at least not in a personal enough manner. It is just too much for a single me. Due to my health issues I am chronically online -- what about people who have more robust offline lives?

Again, I do not know whether that is relevant for your case. It is only that I think it isn't you, as in it isn't about you being a certain way. The situation may just be a result of those mundane circumstances surrounding us. For me personally, a lot of luck is required to expand my circles in a meaningful manner. Of course, it still does suck in the end! Just maybe in a slightly different flavour.

Thank you for listening to my rambles and best of luck <3

#answered #Anonymous

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