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#in fact I remember trying to impress upon my mom that I needed her to be at my freshman orientation
flightybuttlass · 2 months
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my mom, for the last 10 years, has been obsessed with the folk pop band formed by the sons of our local pediatricians, but gaur-an-teed they earn similar money to me and she doesn't realize that they're probably costing off their parents's wealth in the way she accused me of doing
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adammbakri · 1 year
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Kindergarten
I was particularly enchanted by my new brown sandals that day. I don’t recall where we were walking home from, my mother and I, but I knew we were homeward bound. So all was good, and my sandals were the best!
“Hey, do you want to check this out?” my mother said, unintentionally snapping me out of my reverie. I looked to where she was pointing and saw a playground! “YES!” I thought, or maybe I said out loud. I can't quite remember. So my mother carried me over a little wall that separated the street from the playground, and we strolled straight to what was probably the Disneyland of the village: a count of two miserable swings and a rusty slope. My mother must have put me on the swing for a bit or let me slide down the slope a few times before she said “let’s go.”
She held my hand tenderly, like she always did, and walked me towards a small building just a little distance away.
She knocked on a blue metal door. A lady must have welcomed us into what looked to me like a sea of kids! I did not recognize a single soul. The kids were crying, some more intensely than others, some shrieking like it was the end of the world. I was mesmerized by the new spectacle, flabbergasted by the fact that there were more kids like me and adults like my mother! For up until then, and throughout my long life of three and a half years or four, I thought that it was only me, my mom, my sister Yafa, and my brother Ziad (I have no idea why I had no memory of my two other brothers and my father back then). So for a minute that seemed eternal, I entered another reverie, totally forgetting about the new pair of sandals, which I came to conclude years later that my mother had bought for this very special occasion!
I guess my reverie this time was about trying to mentally and emotionally receive what I was forced to meet for the first time in my life: reality, or so it seemed.
I must have become tremendously confused and in desperate need of security. So I reached out in an attempt to hold back my mother’s hand for reassurance, for warmth and safety, for home, for my own version of reality up until then! But to my complete horror, she had disappeared. Absolutely evaporated. Gone. Transformed into the ether. Teleported somewhere else infinitely far from the place and the moment in time I needed her the most.
Obviously, I went straight to the door, but I was too short to reach the handle. The door was locked, and so was I.
It would be an extreme understatement to say that I cried or screamed or banged on the door. I did all that and more. But the worst of it all, the most harrowing, most spine-chilling aspect of the whole experience was the following: nobody seemed to care! The new world I met outside my mother’s lap, AKA heaven, was loveless, strange, and indifferent to my suffering. At least that is how it felt in my barely four-year-old heart.
Later in my young adult life, through years of self-therapy (thanks in part to the above), I learned the following: there are certain events that happen to us as children that seem to define who we are as adults, our outlook on life, the way we see the world and interact with it, how we EXpress and what we are IMpressed by.
Simply put, as children, we are blank pages that one can easily draw upon with whatever colors they want and in whatever shapes they want. The final result of the drawing might - MIGHT… it IS a possibility - miraculously come out just beautiful! The monumental work of the century! An exquisite piece of art! A legend in and of itself! But for the most part, and it is the sad truth: it's a mess! A mess that, at some point in our life - mainly our young adult years or youth - we are faced with the task to sort out, whether we like it or not.
For us to grow, heal, and thrive, we have to be able to grab hold of the page that was used without our invitation - our own page, our birthright! We may not be able to erase what has already been painted, but we can certainly choose our own brush and add the colors we want, give shape to what might be an incoherent, amateurish drawing, straighten a line or curve it, or simply take a moment to observe our personal portrait and breathe!
Breathe…
And contemplate upon what might have been the masterpiece that demanded our attention inward... homeward towards Light.
Maybe… just maybe that was the journey that made Rumi discover that “wounds are the place where the Light enters you”.
Side note: In defense of my beautiful mother, I have to say that she was the best, most loving and kind mother in the world! Never for a second neglecting me or making me feel unloved. This story represents a natural event in every child's life. This "parting" between mother and child happens on every first day of kindergarten. Its impact, however, is naturally different on children and is associated with many other elements that I am not versed in.  
Adam
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The Sword Spell
. language
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Somewhere during year 5 after chapter 6
Merula: So you are telling me that YOU can cast spells wandless BEFORE ME!? I would be mad if I wasn't so impressed.
Alexandros: Oh no, I haven't learned that quite yet.
Merula: But I saw you use a transfiguration spell without your wand!
Adam: She's talking about the sword spell, yeah we cast that one without our wand, Malcolm can too.
Merula: How!? Transfiguration magic is the hardest to perform wandless?
Alexandros: Well we can only cast THAT spell wandlessly.
Adam: Mom wanted to make sure that if anything happened to us, we would not be defenseless.
Alexandros: So she made us practice it over and over-
Adam: until we could preform it without a wand without any ill effects.
Malcom walks in on them and joins the conversation.
Malcolm: Mom gave us precise directions during our training and made sure we never strove away from it. She is hard on us, but she loves us. She doesn't want us to BE like her.
The brothers in unison: She wants us to be better.
Merula is deeply touched by the conversation they just had. Though she doesn't wanna say it to them, she reflects upon their and her own family dynamic. How their mother's love represents and instance where her weakness made them stronger.
Though Merula doesn't know the full extent of it, their mother's fear of losing her family aspired her to push her children to be strong enough to stand on their own. So if Sophia Deathwood shared the same fate of her parents, leaving her children alone to defend themselves. She knows that they will survive.
But Merula doesn't need to know the full extent to understand the message. That perhaps...love doesn't make you weak. That maybe love can make you and those you love stronger.
Adam: Hehe he Remember that time Malcolm casted the spell incorrectly and conjured a dozen fish!
Malcolm: HOW COULD I NOT? I slapped a dummy with a fish hahaahah!
Merula: bblah hahaha that's hilarious!
Merula: By the way Ravenclaw could you~
Malcolm: ABSOLUTELY NOT!
Merula: I didn't even-
Malcolm: I don't fucking need to listen to know that YOU are trying to trick and deceive us. That you want my brother to teach you the spell so you can stab him in the back later.
Adam: Like how you did with the Devil's Snare!
Malcolm: HE STILL HAS SCARS ON HIS NECK AND BACK!
Malcolm: I know that you were his date to the festival and all, but we are NOT friends. And I will not allow you to be able to hurt my family. You have done nothing to show that you are not a threat.
Alexandros: <She is letting down her pride.>
Malcolm: <what's that?>
Alexandros: <You know for a fact that she is the most stubborn when it comes to pride. Never being able to admit when they are wrong or weak.>
Malcolm: <Yes and what about that? She didn't admit she was wrong for what she did. She didn't even apologize!>
Merula: They are just staring at each other. ... They are using legilimency aren't they?
Adam: Yep
Merula: Fuck.
Adam: HAHa you can't add your thoughts to try and persuade them.
Merula: Out of all of them how are you the most annoying?!
Adam: I am a Hufflepuff :)
Alexandros: <But she didn't stop you from telling her she was in the wrong when she could have hexed you.>
Malcolm: <Doing the bare minimum is not reason to reward her. I am still against helping her.>
Adam: <I'm down for making her work for it. Plus it can be pretty funny. Giving her an impossibly hard task.>
Malcolm: <Thank you once again for being funny.>
Adam: <It is my specialty.>
Alexandros: <Trust me if she does anything bad I make her pay for it.>
Merula: Look forget it, I should not have even asked I will get out of your weird sibling business. Just forget I said anything.
Malcolm: Great now that that's settled-
Alexandros: Malcoooolm...
Adam: Don't say anything stupid.
Alexandros: I'll teach you the wand version of the spell, if .... You help me study for potions.
Merula ponders the proposal for some time.
Merula: So you will allow me to learn a new spell if I help you by showing you why you are wrong and I am better?
Alexandros: That's not exactly what I -
Adam: HA!!
Merula: You got yourself a deal Deathwood!!!
Adam: He said something stupid.
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vaurien · 10 months
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this is just like one huge trauma dump so read at your own risk
CW: Sui, SA, Abuse, SH, Homelessness, Death/Loss/Grief, Alcohol/Alcohol Poisoning
my mom is down to spend time with us, so we went out to dinner. the topic of my father came up, because he's also coming to town. he's going to stay at my sister's because he's going to be buying her a new washer, and a new car. he's staying Monday through Thursday this week, and I'm supposed to be watching my nephew for her, at her place, on Tuesday so that they can go car shopping. and the whole dinner topic was based around "do you think he'll behave?" - our father is/was abusive and i went no-contact over a year ago (will be two years this October) the last time he threatened me.
i'm all messed up trying to anticipate what it's going to be like seeing him, because i literally can't remember the last time i saw him (he's a truck driver anyway so even before going no contact, i didn't see him very often). my mother and my sister swear that he is more introspective and repentant, especially after his mother died (this July was the year anniversary of her passing), and my going no contact hit him when he realized i was serious.
the conversation at dinner actually went. well? i don't really mean in terms of my moms responses (they weren't terrible but nothing amazing) but. i felt so comfortable articulating a huge piece of trauma. maybe because my sister was doing it too? but it felt good to get it out.
a big piece of hurt comes from not being comfortable asking my parents for help - partially because of my father's abuse and my mother's neglect, and partially because they couldn't always afford to help us anyway. they're both bad at emotional help and financial help, again, wasn't always a possibility.
and i'm not mad at my parents for being poor. not at all. it was the fact that my first instinct when i needed help, as a kid and now as a young adult, was NOT to go to my parents. because they couldn't and often wouldn't help me. and undergrad is really hard when all around you are young adults who CAN turn to their parents. young adults who get home sick. young adults with a family and a family home to miss. kids who, upon falling into crisis, found their greatest comfort and clarity going home for a weekend. kids who could invite their family to campus events knowing they would enjoy it. knowing that it was safe.
the people i always turned to for help kept changing - a series of responsible adults at school, and in undergrad, that i worked with/for. the tradeoff of course being i worked a job that also traumatized me even more. but if i had never been an RA i would have been even more alone than i already (and still) felt. 5 years of having no one to ask for help, of having people to help that could only help me so much. and i get that that is kind of part of growing up - realizing you are the only person who can or will fix something - but not like that. not what i experienced.
5 years of spiraling into "fuck me, I'm ALONE" whenever something happened. one year my financial aid fell short, and i ended up owing the university $4,000. i made less than minimum wage as an RA so i couldn't just rack up that money by working. i was already no contact with my father (the only person who had any chance of paying even a fraction of that sum). i was sending my sister with her newborn half my paychecks on a relatively frequent basis. because she had a kid and kids should come first.
in order to fix that $4,000 discrepancy, i had to meet with a connection my student mentor had (unironically if I hadn't been on academic probation, I never would have had access to this person). and don't get me wrong, he seemed like a nice man. empathetic.
but i had to meet with him and spill out all my trauma, because trauma and adversity is what impressed him most. he was so happy to listen. he was really impressed, between having to transfer to main campus early so i would have consistent access to food, heat, water, electricity, internet and fucking toilet paper, and the fact that upon landing i chose to enter a job in which i found myself regularly witnessing the incredibly traumatic moments of other kids - holding their hands after sui attempts, after self-harm, sending them away to hospitals i didn't trust, watching their breathing and keeping them responsive after drinking far too much and being abandoned by their friends outside on the stoop, sexual assault disclosures, counseling my queer residents with abusive family members, the list goes on - albeit a little coercively because RAs got housing fee waivers, and i couldn't afford housing otherwise. fuck me, one of my friends killed themselves and i didn't even have anyone to tell about it. not in a way that mattered. or helped me grieve.
he was impressed enough with my extensive trauma to call his contacts in the financial aid office, and i was awarded a $4,000 "policy exception grant" for being so openly, awesomely traumatized. 5 years of that very same routine. i went to a "public ivy" so demonstrating and proving my trauma over and over again to assert that i deserved to be there, or in some cases, deserved another chance, was part of being a marginalized person who "made it there." all because i didn't have anyone i could ask for help.
it just felt good to share. to acknowledge in front of my mother how truly alone her and my father left us. how vulnerable and damaged.
anyway. i have no ides what i will say to my father. or if i will even say much of anything. because not only did he put me in danger with what he did (cut off my phone service in the middle of a secluded rural college campus), but he put other people's kids in danger, too. being an RA sometimes requires using your personal cell to call for help if your duty partner is using the duty phone and you need to make another call. i remember vividly being at the scene of a sui attempt and not being able to call the fucking police while my duty partner called the HD on duty. it was bad enough to witness but even worse to be completely ineffectual in the moment.
and to feel like my father is hurting someone else's kid, including my own residents? it hurts more than him always hurting me. because at least i was used to being the one that gets hurt. but to kneecap my ability to respond and keep them safe was just a whole other fucking level. and i don't think he'll ever understand any of this.
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182 Centimeters | Tall!F!Reader x Surprise
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A great boon has been bestowed upon Aoi Todo. First, he got to meet Takada in person. Second, he gained a brother. Third, he was able to fight a special grade all in one month.
Is there anything else that could make this trip perfect?
Todo didn't think so until he lays eyes on you, standing in the middle of the hallway with luggage tucked under one arm and the other holding onto a rolling suitcase. He remembers now about Mai mentioning a late edition transfer student who was going to be joining in the school games a little late. He only wishes Mai had warned him about the other thing about you. The fact that you are an amazon in the flesh.
"She has to be 187," Todo thinks upon first seeing you and sizing you up from a respectable distance. "No, she's definitely closer to 185. Definitely, 185," he corrects as he tries to measure you by judging how far your head was away from the top door frame. When he glances down at your feet, he realizes his stupid mistake and smacks himself on the forehead. "I'm such an idiot. I forgot about her shoes." Taking your soles into account, he finally narrows down your height range. You have to be 182cm. An even 6 feet. That makes you taller than even Takada!
Todo's eyes widen upon the realization.
You had half his attraction factor right there; and with his help in training, you would definitely have the second half. He knows plenty of exercises that would make your ass look great and have the rest of your body strong enough to toss any curse. You guys could make training into dates, and dates would lead to the two of you making kissy faces. Aoi can already picture it. Naturally, you'd be admiring him, shirtless and glistening with sweat, unable to take your eyes off him. Then, you'd grow embarrassed when he would call you out on it and try to look away like you were never staring in the first place. Luckily for you, he wouldn't mind if you wanted to look at his chiseled chest a little while longer. Or better yet, touch it. 
Todo isn't sure what he's done to deserve such luck. Perhaps the world is rewarding him for finally breaking his record of 1000 sit-ups in an hour or maybe it's the limited-edition lucky Takada-chan charm that arrived in a mail a week earlier working its magic?
Either way, this might be the best year of his life, Todo decides.
That is until he hears a familiar voice. 
"Hey there! How are you doing?" Yuuji asks loudly as he walks up to your person. Todo should've known. Of course, his brother would sense best girl material walking into the building.
"My name is Yuuji. What's yours?"
"I'm (Name). I'm a new student here. I'm a little lost actually. Could you help me out?"
Even your voice sounds so cute! You were so perfect.
That means Yuuji had no chance with the way he was doing things now. Despite Todo wanting you for himself, he could never leave his brother to make such an embarrassment of himself. If the two of them are to battle for your love, it has to be a fair battle.
"Yeah, the dorms are thi—" Yuuji yelps as he's suddenly tugged away from you and dragged around the nearest corner, leaving you in a confused state where you stood.
"What’s the big idea?" Yuuji asks, breaking free from the grasp that held him.
"I'm trying to save you, brother! What do you think you're doing walking up to a woman like that so casually?" Todo asks.
It takes Yuuji a few seconds to realize that Todo meant you were the woman that couldn't be so casually spoken to since he's fairly sure you're a first-year like him. "I'm pretty sure she's the same age as us, dude."
This is worse than he thought. He's definitely going to have to give Yuuji the rundown on how to properly ask a girl out. "That doesn't matter. She's still a lady that requires finesse if you're going to try to ask her out," Todo says. 
Sadly, they are too busy in their discussion to notice you getting impatient for Yuuji to return or to notice another one of your classmates passing them and heading in your direction. You are just thankful to finally have someone help walk you to your dorm and not ditch you instead.
For the rest of the day, Yuuji is stuck with Todo lecturing in his ear. The first time being at the baseball game against the Kyoto school.
"First, you need to set the mood. And by mood, I mean you need to get her attention on you. Do something to impress her without her knowing you're trying to impress her," Todo instructs as you round home base on long legs, which Todo claims is made for a goddess. You were able to get a score for the team thanks to Fushiguro's sacrifice bunt, and the two of you take a seat in the dugout.
"Shouldn't you be helping your team?" Yuuji asks Todo after seeing him compliment your score. Todo sighs. Obviously, Yuuji needs more lessons. 
Eventually, Yuuji steps up to the plate for his turn. Naturally, he hits a home run. As he rounds home, he sees you applauding loudly. Your eyes perfectly on him. It definitely feels good to have a cute girl's attention, and Yuuji realizes that he did really want to ask you out. He wonders if Todo thinks that's a good way to set the mood.
The next time Todo decides to instruct Yuuji is after they all take their showers and decide to rest up before dinner. "Next, you need to leave a letter under her door. Something to pique her interest and make her want to meet up with you."
Luckily, Yuuji has seen this before in anime. "Right, right. I heard of that actually." He easily drafted a letter and slid it under your dorm door. It sounds like you're talking to someone else on the other side so Yuuji hopes you'll see it in time so the two of you can meet up in fifteen minutes.
"Finally, make sure the place you meet up is scenic," Todo says, nodding his head and closing his eyes to repeat the steps in his head as he follows his brother to the school's courtyard. Impress? Check. Letter? Check. Scenic meet-up place? Check.
It isn't until he feels Yuuji's hand on his shoulder and a quick thanks that Todo realizes his mistake. Yuuji rushes away from him to the other side of the courtyard where you're waiting with the letter in hand. 
"My name is Yuuji. I don't know if you remember me from class."
"Oh, yes, I know! You hit that homerun. It was really great."
Todo stands in shock. 
...He was so busy trying to teach that he actually forgot to pursue you first!
"Really? Thanks! I was just trying to make sure I actually hit it. I wasn't expecting it to go so far." Yuuji laughed. "So, (Name), I was wondering if you wanna go out together?"
Todo could cry. Actually, he already feels the tears coming down his face, but his brother could at least be happy. And if his brother is happy, that's all he needed!
"I'm sorry," you say sweetly. "I only showed up because I didn't want to stand you up, but the truth is I already like someone, and I wouldn't feel comfortable going out with someone when I have a crush on another person."
Todo's ears ring with your words. You already like someone!
"Oh, well, that's too bad, I guess. Thanks for telling me," Yuuji says with a disappointed yet understanding smile while Todo finds the opportunity to scoot in the middle of your conversation.
"Excuse me but your crush wouldn't happen to be on me by any chance?" he asks, hopeful.
You force a smile onto your face and tilt your head. "Sorry...Have we met?" you ask, nervously.
Todo gasps as he feels his world crashing down. Your date. Your marriage. Your kids. All gone, and it’s all black in his memory after that. The next thing he can recall is sitting in the eating area with Itadori. He remembers this heartache once before. "It's just like with Takada-chan..." he mumbles heartbrokenly.
"I told you already. We never went to the same middle school, and you never confessed to Takada," Yuuji grumbles, but Todo knows that Yuuji is only trying to make him feel better. He is so lucky to have such a good brother.
"Who...Who do you think it is anyway?"
Yuuji pauses.
He actually wonders that as well.
Then, they hear your voice ringing through the dining hall. Immediately, both sets of eyes are on you. 
"Fushiguro-kun, I wanted to thank you for helping me get settled into the academy. My mom gave me a buy one, get one free for a sushi place for when I made some friends, so...I was wondering if you wanted to be my plus one?"
Then, Yuuji finally gets it. He had been ignoring the small conversations happening around him the entire time thanks to Todo's interruptions.
The Hall.
"Excuse me. I'm looking for the dorms. Gojo-sensei was supposed to show me, but he got sidetracked so I've been sort of left on my own."
"Of course, he did. Geeze, that guy." Megumi sighs. "You can follow me. I'll show you where some empty rooms near the other girls are."
"Thank you so much! I'm (Name) by the way."
"Fushiguro," he states plainly and simply as you struggle behind him with your luggage. "Is that stuff heavy? Want me to help you carry it?"
”Yes. My arms got numb while I was waiting. Thank you so much!”
The Game.
"Out!" Gojo says. Fushiguro rounds first base to head back to the dugout, but you at least made it home to score. You head to the dugout as well.
"That's too bad, Fushiguro. You'll get it next time," you say, sitting next to him.
"As long as Kugisaki made it to second and you made it home then it's fine. I'm not really too hyped up on winning anyway."
”Oh. I was really looking forward to seeing you get one.”
”Too bad. Guess you’ll have to wait,” and by “wait” Megumi had meant probably not ever but you laughed anyway even though you had got what he meant. 
”I don’t mind waiting.”
The Dorms.
"Kugisaki-san said you could summon different shikigami animals."
"That's true."
"Would you mind showing me sometime? I love animals."
"What is your favorite?"
"I really like rabbits. Are you able to summon those?"
"Not at the moment, but I’ll show you when I learn it. How do you feel about dogs instead?"
”That cute dog was yours? That’s amazing.”
And now.
"Yeah, sure. I wasn't really in the mood for anything at school anyway," Fushiguro agrees, and your face lights up with a glow that could rival sunshine. Yuuji thinks if he squints he can see the anime hearts starting to dance over your head but Fushiguro didn't seem to mind.
Itadori could almost laugh. That's a new record in anyone ever befriending Fushiguro. The two of you must have hit it off really well. Yuuji smiles. In that case, he couldn't be upset. That must mean fate has something in store for you guys, and he didn't want to get in the way. "I guess girls really do like that cool, quiet type."
Meanwhile, Todo is crying in defeat. How could a woman like you like Fushiguro? 
"He's so boring though..."
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justauthoring · 3 years
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The Long Wait
Prompt: Eventually, the hoping became too much to bare. Requested by: no one.
A/N: This is basically a remake of this fic -- upon re-watching the GMG arc with my mom, I couldn’t help but look back at this fic and realize how much more I could’ve done with it. Thus, this was born. Pairing: Gray Fullbuster x F!Reader
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“What do you mean you’re leaving?”
Keeping your gaze trained to the ground, you absolutely refuse to look up -- because you know that if you did, your heart would break all over again.
“I’m sorry,” you mumble, words jumbled together, voice quiet that if the guild hall was so completely silent, they definitely wouldn’t have heard you. But they do, and they falter at the way you sound so absolutely broken. And of course, all of them were, but there was something different about the way you sounded -- it was like you were defeated. 
Macao steps towards her, you hear it rather then see it, and can imagine his hand stretched out towards you, trying to placate you. “Y/N, we understand--” and he halts, voice catching in the back of his throat. “We understand more then anyone how you feel, but--”
“It’s different.” You find yourself cutting in, voice sharp, and you wince at yourself because you sound so incredibly selfish and rude. Who were you to say that your pain was any different from theirs? Any worse? But, still, you continue, your emotions getting the better of you. “It’s just... different. I... I can’t be here knowing they’re... he’s gone.”
“Y/N-nee, we don’t know that they’re gone!”
Your eyes fall shut at the sound of Romeo’s voice.
“We have to keep searching for them,” he argues, defiant, adamantly shaking his head. “They’re somewhere out there, I know that. And Gray wouldn’t--”
“They’re gone,” you hiss, interrupting him and finally glancing up to regard your friends, your family. They rear back at your harsh words, and that guilt festers even deeper inside of your chest, with the way they’re looking at you. Jet and Droy look near tears, and you know they’re thinking of Levy. And Bisca and Alzack look in shock at your outburst, you’re usually so quiet and calm. Macao looks angry, and the rest just stare at you, varying reactions that all mesh together.
Because really, it’s the way Romeo looks at you, still so young, so full hope as your words basically slap him in the face.
But you’re too far gone now, and there’s no stopping you.
“It’s been two years,” you continue, voice softer but still cutting, still hurtful. “They’re not coming back. They’re never coming back.”
He’s never coming back.
They don’t respond. No one argues, even if some look like they might. Maybe they’re understanding, maybe they’re finally getting it -- it’s been too long now and no one from the island is coming back. You’d been hopeful at first, you’d been like Romeo -- you’d refused to lose hope. But your heart is broken and there’s no mending it and you can’t keep staring at those doors all day expecting, hoping, praying that he’ll walk through them only for him never to.
So, you turn, nothing but a soft, sorrowful, pathetic apology leaving your lips as you turn your backs on your friends and leave them.
And as you turn, you see his familiar face, the dark black of his hair, that drawling smirk on his lips, and his cold, but always soft when directed at you eyes looking at you, but when you blink, he’s gone.
-
You huff at the weight dropped around your shoulders, inhaling deeply when you see a familiar puff of blonde hair.
“Did you hear?”
You don’t need to ask what he means. It’s pretty obvious.
“Fairy Tail will be competing again this year.”
When you turn to look at Sting, he’s smirking -- all bright eyed and giddy, and you hold back your own snark as you regard him with a small nod. Sting was one of the few to know of the fact that you used to be part of Fairy Tail -- him and Rogue, given that they were the ones who recruited you, and then the master as well.
It wasn’t news you were eager for everyone to know. Fairy Tail was a laughing stock in all respects now, but Sabertooth seemed to have a particular fondness of mocking the way the guild had fallen. And it was easy to hide you’d ever been apart of it given you hadn’t been a particularly well-known mage back when you’d been a member. Your powers were relatively new, and with, regrettably, the help of the Twin Dragon slayers you’d definitely grown in aspects of strength.
Three years since you’d joined Sabertooth -- two years of training on your own, and three of being surrounded by much stronger mages had you adapting and constantly changing. You were practically unrecognizable.
You were known at Y/N of Sabertooth now, and it was like the Y/N of Fairy Tail never even existed at all.
“I’m surprised,” you hum, shifting as Sting moves to take a seat next to you, still whilst having an arm draped over your arm. You blink at the sudden arrival of Rogue, not having heard him, as he takes a seat in front of you, before continuing. “They weren’t in it last year, or the year before if I remember. After finishing last every year before.”
You hadn’t been apart of Sabertooth’s team, but you do remember watching.
It had been... hard, to say the least.
“Ah, well, this year they have a new team.” Rogue explains blandly.
“New members, you should say,” Sting smirks.
Brows furrowed, you shake your head at their words, confusion flooding at you at the particular gleefulness of Sting’s expression. He always got a kick out of embarrassing other teams, not even just Fairy Tail, but there was something different about the way his eyes sparkled.
Sting meets your gaze, and without wavering, adds; “or should I say, old?”
Your breath catches, and even as your mind starts spinning, you’re all too aware of the way both Sting and Rogue are watching you carefully.
You turn from Rogue to Sting, and absolutely hate the gleam in the latter’s eyes as he smirks down at you. Keeping a tight hold on you, he pulls you closer, leaning until he’s a breaths away; “it’s a good thing I managed to convince the Master to let you on the team this year, Y/N,” he grins widely, “you’ll get to reunite with your old pales.”
That... that couldn’t be possible.
They were--They were dead. They are dead.
“I... I need some fresh air.” Shoving Sting’s arm off of you, you ignore his calls and his merciless laughter as you stock out the guild doors, bypassing Minerva which you know will get you in shit later. You don’t really care in that moment, you can’t even think straight, you need air. 
You need to breathe.
Sting must be lying. He has to be lying. There’s... they were dead, it’s been seven years.
Seven years.
How... why now? Why after all this time?
And you convince yourself he isn’t lying. You ignore Sting every time he tries to talk to you, and focus on training. It would be no good if you failed since you were on the roster this year -- Master would kill you if you failed to impress him and keep Sabertooth at the very top. And it’s easy enough to do, spend all your time training, pushing yourself to the brink, until it’s a few days before the games and you realize, Sting wasn’t lying.
You’d been trying to ignore it, ignore the urge, but eventually you give in and find yourself in the city of Magnolia. A place you haven’t been in a long time.
Fairy Tail’s location had changed, but you’d made sure to keep tabs on them. You never showed your face, mainly because you knew that in the end, you’d betrayed your friends. In their eyes, you assumed, you were the enemy, a traitor. You’d left them, left your guild in a time they’d needed you most, and almost instantly regretted it.
But every time you tried to go back, every time you made your way towards those doors, you’d remember the words you’d said -- “They’re not coming back. They’re never coming back.” -- and, like a coward, you were never able to face them.
From the moment you’d left, all you’d wanted to do was go back but it was too late for that now. And so you settled for keeping tabs, helping them where you could, always in secret -- you knew how they owed money, and you didn’t have a lot, but you always anonymously send some the guild’s way in hopes of helping. Sabertooth would kill you if they found out, specifically Sting, but it was your way of repaying all the hurt you must’ve caused them.
It’s why you know their new location. And, without even being there for more then five minutes, you see them.
A blue flying cat, followed by a white one, a tuff of pink hair, red hair, blue hair, blonde and most importantly, him. His dark hair, the fact that nothing’s changed and he looks exactly like he had those seven years ago when you’d wished him good luck on the S Class competition, and pressed a shy, chaste kiss to his cheek, the two of you blushing madly as he left, waving you goodbye.
But, they were there. He was there.
-
“And last but certainly not least, is the team that came first in the preliminaries... that’s right, you know them, you love them! Now, get on your feet and scream for the most powerful guild in all Fiore! The one and only, Sabertooth!”
You wince at the cheering, two steps behind everyone else as Sting makes his grand entrance, looking thoroughly most pleased and proud of himself then anyone else. However, even you can see the smirk on Rufus’ and Orga’s face. 
If anything, it’s you and Rogue that don’t look all that excited.
And you, for a specific reason. One that stares you right in the face the second you walk into the arena.
Elfman, Erza, Lucy, Natsu, but more importantly, Gray all look at you the second your team arrives. You can even feel Fairy Tail team B, and the rest of the guild up in the stands watching you and only you. You also notice with disdain that Sting had purposefully made way for you to be seen, even if you hadn’t been that hidden, you would’ve rather remained in the shadows.
That, and you’re not exactly sure what to say as they all stare at you.
“Y/N?!”
It’s Natsu who yells it, but it’s Lucy who steps towards you, baffled and confused; “Y/N, what’re you...”
But you only lower your gaze, eyes falling shut as Sting pulls you into his side, laughing loudly. “What a reunion!” He cheers, pumping his fist in the air, before turning to you. “Isn’t it so great to see all your old guildmates, Y/N?”
You meet their eyes, just as the announcer calls out;
“What’s this? A reunion? Could it be perhaps that Sabertooth’s own Y/N Y/L/N was once a member of Fairy Tail? What a twist on her debut in the Grand Magic Games!”
“This is so not man...”
Turning your head at the sound of Elfman’s voice, your breath catches in the back of your throat.
“Elfman,” Erza says sharply, pulling your eyes back on her and thus the rest of them, noticing with a thick swallow the way her eyes have never left your own. “I’m sure Y/N has her reasons.”
But as she stares at you, waiting for you to say something, you simply turn, walking off.
“I didn’t know you used to be in Fairy Tail,” Rufus drawls to you when you pass him, and your shoulders tighten.
That’s right... now, everyone knew.
“You never needed to know,” you say simply.
“Y/N.”
“It seems Fairy Tail’s Team A Gray Fullbuster approaches Sabertooth’s own Y/N Y/L/N, and the crowd watches in anticipation at the clear tension amongst the two of them--.”
Everything freezes. Shoulders tensing, you slowly turn, meeting Gray’s eyes -- the one you’d been specifically avoiding.
“We won’t lose.”
I know, you want to say. I don’t want you to, you want to tell him. I want Fairy Tail to win, you want to plead. But instead, knowing the eyes that watch you, you simply say; “neither will Sabertooth.”
-
This had to be some cruel joke.
Your punishment, maybe.
Sabertooth’s Y/N Y/L/N versus Fairy Tail’s Team A Gray Fullbuster
That’s what the board said, that what that God awful announcer calls with clear joy in his voice -- your first battle, the second day of the Games, and this way the turn out.
There was no way you’d win. 
Ignoring the fact that you had no doubt Gray was stronger then you -- you simply just couldn’t. You wouldn’t. Not against Fairy Tail and certainly not against Gray.
“Good luck, Y/N,” Sting calls as you move to make your way towards the arena. “Though I doubt you’ll need it.”
You hate his words, hate the way he knows, hate the way he seems to get such joy out of everything that had happened. This was his fault. His fucking fault that you were here, and that this was happening.
Though, of course, even you knew that was true.
“Sabertooth’s Y/N Y/L/N has never been apart of Sabertooth’s team, but we can expect something great from Fiore’s strongest guild, needless to say. Do you know anything about Y/N Y/L/N, Yajima-san?”
“I don’t know much about Y/’N now, but in her Fairy Tail days, she never really made a name for herself, but I do distinctly remember her powers being incredibly unique.”
“Ah! A mystery then. And of course, Fairy Tail’s Gray Fullbuster is a Ice Wizard, but after his performance in day one’s Hidden Competition, the crowd’s not too sure what to expect. Nonetheless, it should be an intense match between old guildmates now turned enemy’s.”
“Shut up,” you hiss to yourself, nails digging into the palm of your hands.
“Ah, I see you’re just as chipper as you used to be.”
Swallowing thickly, you inhale sharply as Gray comes to a stop a few feet before you. It’s closest you’ve been to him since that first day, and more importantly, then in seven years. You’d already known since that day, but he really does look exactly like he had that day. Hasn’t aged a day. You don’t know the story, you don’t know how he’s back, but you know you’ve heard the term ‘seven year blank’ echoing around.
That makes more sense as you stare at him now.
Still eighteen, you’re now older then him then a year younger like you had been before. 
Remaining silent, your head tilts back, where you know Sabertooth is, chest tightening.
“Y/N.”
Turning to Gray at the sound of your name, your lips part when you noticed the way his eyes have softened, even if only a little, like he caught something in the past moment you’d turned away from him. He looks so much more... concerned then he had the first day, and that was only yesterday. When he’d called for you, he’d looked so angry...
Now, he only looked worried.
“What happened?”
Swallowing thickly, you try to appear unbothered. “I left.”
“There’s more to it, I know there is,” Gray shakes his head, “the others told us about the day--”
Eyes clenching shut, a simply jerk of your head has Gray flying back. It causes a roar of gasps, surprise and anticipation in the thought that the fight is finally starting. But you know, unlike them, that it won’t get farther then that -- at least not from your end.
Gray hisses, slowly crawling to his feet, before he smirks at you; “you’ve gotten strong.”
“It’s been seven years.”
“Still,” he shrugs, stopping before you once again. “You have control now.”
You shrug, mimicking him with a smirk, “it’s been seven years.”
However, the facade falls all too quick when he takes a step towards you. Your body tenses, fists clenching as he continues to make his way towards you until he’s directly before you. He eyes you for a moment, quiet, carefully, and you nearly break then and there.
“It may have been seven years, but I know you best,” he whispers, voice low, “I know you’re lying.”
You shake your head, pushing his words away from your thoughts; “attack me.”
And he blinks, surprised; “what?”
“I need you to attack me,” you repeat, keeping your eyes trained downwards, refusing to meet his eyes. “I... I just need you to.”
And part of you expects him to -- you deserve it, you know, after all you’d done.
But, a second later, Gray’s stepping back, pulling your wide eyes on him as he shakes his head; “Fairy Tail doesn’t attack their own friends, Y/N. You know that.” And your breath hitches when his hand moves to raise.
“No!” You yell, before you can help yourself, eyes flashing a bright gold, like they had seconds before, holding Gray’s arm in place as he blinks back at you. Letting out a soft whimper, one you hope he doesn’t hear, you hold his arm in place, eyes falling shut as your own arm raises, the crowd falling eerily silent.
“I give up.”
And you knew, even as you feel the glares on your back, that there really wasn’t any other outcome that could’ve happened. You’d never hurt Gray, you knew, and you refused to hurt Fairy Tail anymore.
You were destined to lose this match.
-
“What’s so special about those fairies, huh?”
Wincing, you gasp at the squeeze on your throat, trying to suck in air that won’t come as your eyes fall on Sting’s own narrowed ones, glaring down at you. The brick of the wall behind you bites into your skin, and you know his grip will leave bruises, but even as you gasp for air and it feels like your vision is closing in on you, you have no regrets.
You never would, even if it’ll get you killed.
“What’s so fucking special about them?”
You refuse to respond, even if Sting wasn’t blocking off your air way you wouldn’t. Even if you could easily knock him away, send him flying, you don’t -- you’ll only pay for it more later.
“What’s so special about him?!”
He drops you then, and you fall to your knees with a thud, a cry leaving your lips as he sends a sharp kick to your gut, causing you to double over. It takes you a moment, a solid minute to catch your breath, and even then you’re still gasping, voice raspy as you raise your chin, eyes narrowing as you say the words you’ve been wanting to say to Sting for years.
“Fairy Tail is the guild Sabertooth could never be,” you hiss, your voice pathetic but your gaze menacing. “And Gray is a better man than you’ll ever be. All of them are. You’ll never be as good as Natsu.” You hit him where you know it hurts, the words having been on the tip of your tongue for years but you’d always held back in fear of what would happen.
Well, you’re no longer afraid. You’re too far gone now.
Sting’s eyes narrow and his face twists, ready to explode, before he breathes, and a smirk curls onto his lips. “You’ll never be apart of your pathetic guild again,” he hisses, “you’ll be stuck in Sabertooth for the rest of your life. Only, Master will make sure your life is a living hell.”
He sends another sharp kick at your side, but says nothing more as he turns, walking off with a huff.
It takes you a moment to gather yourself, slowly pushing yourself up to your knees where you stay, chest heaving, the pain radiating across your entire body, fingers finding your neck and touching the offended skin gently as you hiss in response.
You didn’t regret surrendering, but you couldn’t help but be terrified of what would happen when you walked into the inn that night.
You never should’ve left Fairy Tail. It was a regret you’d probably take to your grave.
“We actually have points thanks to you.”
Blinking at the sound of Gray’s voice, you slowly glance up at him, arm still wrapped tightly around your stomach as you stare up at him.
“I’m glad,” you whisper, smiling gently, “Fairy Tail deserves to win.”
Gray sighs, and stepping towards you, he reaches a hand out; “here,” he says softly, voice a mere whisper. You meet his eyes, before glancing at his hand for a moment, slowly slipping your own in it. He helps you to your feet, holding you up as you waver, hissing in pain, and then, before you know it, before you can even help yourself, you fall against him, forehead pressing against his shoulder as you let out a whimper.
“You know,” Gray says after a moment, “I still remember that kiss.”
Shaking your head, you let out a quiet, somewhat forced laugh.
“What happened, Y/N?”
“You were gone,” you whisper, finally answering. “You all were, but you were too. And... And I couldn’t handle staring at those doors everyday waiting for you to walk through them, only for you never to.” Pulling back, you meet his eyes, “I love you, I wanted to tell you that day, and it crushed me that I never did.”
Hands falling on your waist, Gray shakes his head; “no one would tell me where you were when we came back. It’s like every time I asked, this look would come over them and everyone would fall silent. When I learned it had been seven years, I wanted to see you first and tell you... tell you, I love you too.”
Biting your lip, “it’s too late,” you whisper. “The others must hate me and I... Sting will never let me leave.”
Gray’s grip tightens. “They don’t hate you, Y/N. Everyone misses you. I miss you,” and then, he shifts, cupping your cheek to pull your eyes on his own again. “I need you to come back.”
“But... Sting--”
“We’ll figure it out, Master will figure it out,” Gray argues, shaking his head. “The Guild needs you. I need you.”
Lips parting, you try to find the words, only to realize there are none. So, instead, you simply fall into his arms, holding him tight against you and hold on to his promise.
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scapegrace74-blog · 3 years
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New Ways of Turning Into Stone, Chapter 7
A/N  For anyone waiting patiently for this chapter, I apologize.  Somewhere in the midst of writing this story, I fell out of love with it, making it very hard to find the inspiration to finish. I’m too stubborn to abandon it, though, so here is the final chapter.  The good news is the angst fest is over, for the most part.  Slight reference to child trafficking in the past.  Thanks to everyone who read and interacted with this story!  This final chapter is entitled A Dragonfly in Amber.
The whole story can be found on my A03 page.
Eighteen Months Later
The breeze off the firth was picking up, and Claire wished she’d grabbed a  jumper before leaving her flat.  She spent a lot of time these days looking back at the million decisions that made up a life, aware of their path as though they were footprints visible to the eye.  Where once missteps would have inspired judgement or shame, she could now chart their passage with a certain measure of peace.
A rare free Thursday brought her to a seasonal market in what was otherwise a car park overlooking Edinburgh Castle.  With no specific objective in mind, she wandered the stalls of fresh produce and locally made crafts, meandering but purposeful.  A jar of raw honey and a half-dozen blueberry scones made their way into her tote bag before she stopped at a store selling beautifully woven woolen goods, thinking that she could perhaps invest in a shawl.
Lifting the various offerings from where they were displayed, something caught her eye.  Beneath the many-patterned pile of wool stood a beautiful wooden chest, its heft and patina speaking of its craftsmanship.   It had been painted in a rusted umber, the shape of a dragonfly elegantly carved into its solid lid.
“Tis lovely, is it no’?” a soft lilt startled her from her trance.
“Yes, very.  Is it for sale?”  She had no idea why she’d asked.  Her flat was crowded enough as it was and frivolous purchases no longer within her budget.
“Alas, no.  Twas an anniversary gift from my man.”  Perhaps seeing the disappointment register on her face, the woman added, “I can give ye the card o’ the man who made it, at least.  Ye’re no’ the first tae have admired his work.”
Claire’s hands shook slightly as the shopkeeper sought out the card, an eerie sense of premonition settling over her.  Sure enough, the familiar names leapt into relief as she accepted the woman’s offering:
Lallybroch Furniture Design
James Fraser, Proprietor
***
The afternoon and evening passed in a blur of obligations and routine.  It was only as she settled into the peace of her own bedroom that Claire allowed her thoughts to return to the business card tucked safely into her wallet.  
She’d known Jamie was still in the city.  While she’d resisted the urge to seek him out a thousand times, she couldn’t stop herself from searching his name on the Internet.  A harmless indulgence, she rationalized, and one that assured her that he was well, his business going from strength to strength. Despite the capitol’s tight-knit community, however, their paths had never crossed.  Until now.
Was it a sign?  Long Ago Claire paid no heed to such foolishness, but that was before a chance encounter spun her life one hundred and eighty degrees, sending her down a brand new path.  Now she accepted these memos from the universe with humility.  Tomorrow, she would go looking for Jamie Fraser.
***
Jamie heard the jingle of the bells above the door, even over the mechanical whirr of his sander.  Unbending and blowing a sweaty curl off his forehead, he admired the intricate scrollwork of the custom hutch that was his latest commission.  It still amazed him to watch his visions take shape before his eyes.  If life hadn’t slapped him hard across the face, knocking him far off course, he might have spent the rest of his days unaware of the gift that resided between his hands.
“Took ye long enough, Geordie,” he called out to the footsteps approaching from the door.  “Where’d ye go fer the varnish, Glasgow?”
There was a pause, and an eerie sense of premonition settled over him.  Today was going to be the day.
“It’s not Geordie, it’s me.  Claire.”  He’d thought of her voice each day for the past eighteen months, and yet he hadn’t been able to summon its exact timbre: sonorous, precise, with a smoky finish like well-aged whisky.
“Claire,” he replied to the universe, summoning her by name before he even turned around.
Sawdust motes danced in a sunbeam descending from a clerestory window, illuminating the mahogany in her curls.  She was everything he remembered, and so much more.  The nacre of her skin, now dusted with cinnamon freckles.  The topaz of her eyes less fierce, more open, and overwhelmingly anxious.  The tight line of her jaw was less defined, her once whippet-thin figure filled out into plush curves.  Overall the impression was one of softness, of willing vulnerability.
“The door was open,” she explained needlessly, her eyes drinking him in hungrily.  He wondered what changes she read on his surface.
“It’s... uhhh...” his voice wobbled painfully, “it’s good tae see ye, Sassenach.  How have ye been?”
He hadn’t trusted himself to seek her out since Maggie’s death, understanding that they both needed time to heal.  It didn’t stop him from zeroing in on every glimpse of brown curls, nor from reading wedding announcements with an invisible fist gripping his throat.  If it was meant to be, he counselled himself, they would find one another when the time was right.  And now she was here, standing in his workshop and more lovely than his zealous imaginings.
“Good,” she replied, eyes meeting and then sheering away from his gaze.  “Really good.  Busy.”  She was gripping the strap of her handbag like a parachute cord, and he couldn’t help glancing at her left hand, selfishly relieved to note it was still bare.
“I, ummm, I saw one of your pieces.  At the market yesterday.  Not for sale, of course.  The woman offered me your card, so I thought, you know, that I might...  You’re really very talented, Jamie,” she prattled nervously.
He blushed, delighted by her praise.  “I thank ye, Claire.”  To taste her name in his mouth, so long forbidden, was intoxicating.  He would never tire of saying it.
“And yer work?  Tis Friday.  Are ye taking a well-deserved day off?”
“Oh, no.  I’m not practicing anymore, Jamie.”
He froze, horrified.  Of all the scenarios he’d played out in his mind, he’d never imagined her anything but a doctor. It was too much a part of who she was.  A familiar sense of oppressive responsibility crept over him.  If he’d somehow caused this to happen...
“Sassenach, no...” he whispered.
To his utter confusion, she laughed, merry and bright as the bells that had announced her return to his life.
“It’s alright, truly.  I, well, a lot has changed since last year,” she explained, a glimmer of something coy transforming her face.  His wame sunk into his feet.
“Ye’ve met someone.”   A statement of fact.  Punishment for wishing for something that wasn’t meant to be.
Her spritely laugh rang out again, increasing his pain.  He felt the old, habitual hardening around his heart, and fought to keep his breath steady.  No matter how much it hurt, he owed it to Claire to listen to her joy.
“In a manner of speaking.  His name is Fergus, and he’s eight years old.”
Startled, he stared into her upturned face, trying to read the truth in her features.  A hand, delicate but strong, took his own.  He held onto it like a lifeline as she told her unlikely tale.
Shortly after their last meeting, Claire had been walking through Grassmarket when she’d been jostled by a running figure.  It was only upon righting herself that she realized she was without her phone.   Giving chase, she eventually cornered the thief down a blind alley, only to realize that it was a young boy, unkempt and malnourished.
Rather than turn the pickpocket in, Claire had negotiated an exchange: her phone for a four-course meal and the story of how a boy of his age, with a heavy French accent no less, had come to live on the streets of Edinburgh.
“He was trafficked, Jamie.  A group in Paris were keeping him and other orphans in a brothel.  When they came to transport them, Fergus escaped.  He hid in a lorry, and this is where it brought him.  He had no coat, no money, hardly any English, but he’d been surviving on his wits for six weeks before I found him.  I can’t bear to think what might have happened to him had we not crossed paths that winter’s day.”
“Christ,” he swore, thinking of his own nephew, and what he wouldn’t give to protect the lad’s innocence.
Claire went on to describe the painstaking process of reporting Fergus, whose real name was Claudel, to the authorities without allowing him to be deported back to France and into the waiting hands of the very people he had escaped.
“There was no formal steps to follow, no real resources I could rely on.  I ended up filing for adoption, because it was the only way to keep him safe.  In the beginning, he needed all my attention.  He had no formal schooling and had to learn English in a hurry.  He suffered from terrible nightmares.  I transferred all my patients, shut down the office, but I assumed it was only temporary, until he felt more secure and could go to school with other kids his age.  But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that Fergus isn’t the only trafficked child in Scotland.  I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t do whatever I could to protect every one of them.  So I quit.  I’d made some contacts at ECPAT in London, trying to sort out the mess with Fergus’ immigration paperwork.   I called them up and offered my services on a part-time basis.  A former pediatrician with experience in grief counselling.  They couldn’t accept fast enough.  So now, when I’m not busy being Fergus’ mom, I’m the executive director of ECPAT here in Scotland.”
“Christ,” he repeated.  “Sassenach, I’m...  God, ye’re an amazing woman.”
It was her turn to blush, glancing down to notice that their hands were still clasped, fingers woven together like thirsty roots.  They were standing toe to toe, breathing in harmony.  Jamie smelled of pine, a sharp sweetness that seemed to cling to his body.  She dared a look upwards and found his gaze locked on her mouth.  Oceans stormed in the depths of his eyes.
“You’ve got a little...” she reached for his jaw, “...a little something, right here...”  Before she could dislodge the fleck of sawdust trapped in his auburn stubble, Jamie’s whole body surged forward, their noses practically bumping.
“Sassenach...” he beseeched.
“Yes?”  Wispy, fluttering wings of hope surrounded her.
“I’ve bided as long as I can.  May I please, for the love of all tha’s holy, finally kiss ye?”
A tiny nod, a murmured assent, then their lips took up the conversation that had begun so many months before.  There, in a dusty workshop at eleven o’clock on a Friday morning, the last obstacle that stood between them came crashing to the ground.  In its place came warmth and certainty, a candleflame of cherished possibility. 
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bonesbuckleup · 4 years
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Lord, this answer got long. I’m a little embarrassed about it, but I wrote it, so it’s getting posted. It’s a literal essay. Sorry but also not?
TLDR: Yes, the show is arguably unfair to Sokka about Kya, but it also follows a pattern where Sokka stays quiet about Bad Feelings and plays by the rules established for his character. Katara, meanwhile, grieves loudly and often, and appears to be under the impression that because Sokka’s grief is silent it doesn’t exist, which also fits her character/interactions completely. Neither of them are right or wrong, but it sets them up on inevitable collisions.
Now. If you want to join me on a cactus-juice fueled descent into madness, proceed below the cut.
Number one. We’re referring to this exchange in “The Southern Raiders,” where the Gaang is talking about Zuko and Katara going after the man who killed Kya, which is vicious and brutal and never reflected on:
Aang: You sound like Jet. Katara: It's not the same! Jet attacked the innocent. This man, he's a monster. Sokka: Katara, she was my mother, too, but I think Aang might be right. Katara (angry, yelling): Then you didn't love her the way I did! Sokka (visibly hurt, softly): Katara.
And that’s it. Upon returning, Katara apologizes to Aang and not, as Anon is absolutely correct in pointing out, to Sokka, who is 100% the more injured party. Now. Is it possible this is one of the rare missteps from the atla writers? Yes. Absolutely. Is that the answer I’m about to write a literal fucking essay about? No. Because it’s more painful fun to take it as face value and talk subtext.
First, a reminder that this show is fucking good at what it does. It teaches you how each character grieves as we go: Aang explodes, often triggering the Avatar state, usually crying or angry, and when he does try to repress his Bad Feelings it rarely lasts longer than a day; Toph either shuts down or gets mad, but either way she doesn’t like people seeing her having Bad Feelings and often storms away, knowing that she can’t control it no matter how much she might want to; Zuko yells at the sky in a rainstorm or yells at his dad in an underground tunnel or challenges Zhao to an Agni Kai or yells at his uncle in a jail cell and generally is an emotive nuclear bomb because the boy has feelings and if he keeps them inside for more than three seconds he might explode okay.
Then we have Katara and Sokka.
Let’s start with Katara, since she has the most textual and straightforward displays of grief. She’s really the only one to talk about Kya’s death in Book 1. If Sokka mentions it, it’s barely in passing. I don’t think we hear Hakoda address her death at all (which I’ll return to in a moment.) Katara’s grief is loud. It’s angry. It’s still very much a living thing for her. She thinks she sees Kya in the swamp and breaks down crying, and tells Aang and Sokka about it with no hesitation. When she’s angry and sad at Hakoda for leaving, she acts out and is visibly upset with him, yells at him, cries at him. She out-loud hates Zuko when she comes to the conclusion that he told her about Ursa and got her to talk about Kya to manipulate her. It isn’t that her grief is performative, because it’s a very real and terrible thing, but it’s a grief that’s to be witnessed.
Then, Sokka. Sokka’s grief is more complicated because it exists almost entirely in subtext, especially in regard to Kya. We really only hear him talk about Kya twice, both in Book 3. First, to Toph, when he tells her that he can’t remember what Kya looks like. Worth noting, however, that even though it is Sokka talking, this is still centered on Katara and Katara’s grief. The next time is when Zuko asks what happened to Kya, and Sokka tells the story that leads into the initial flashback. Sokka doesn’t talk about his mom. This is a fact of the show. It’s such a fact of the show that, in “Southern Raiders,” after the exchange at the start of this post, while Katara and Zuko are on the hunt, Sokka doesn’t bring up Kya again and is messing around with Aang. Like nothing has happened or is currently happening--which I’ll come back to in a moment.
So while we can use Kya as a perfect example of how Katara grieves, we can’t really use her for Sokka. So let’s use Yue instead. Moments we see (or don’t see) Sokka grieving Yue:
In the opening to Book 2, we briefly have a shot of Sokka with the moon imposed behind him.
“The Swamp,” where Sokka’s vision is of Yue accusing him of not protecting her. This one is one of the more textual moments of grief--”I think about Yue all the time”--but what’s awful great about it is how Sokka tells Aang and Katara. Aang, obviously, has no qualms about sharing his vision. Katara openly talks about seeing Kya. Sokka only tells them about Yue when explicitly asked. Even then, he doesn’t mention what she said to him. From this, we can assume that Sokka is still holding onto a lot of guilt over her death--guilt that he won’t let Aang and Katara see. Anyway. Moving on.
“The Serpent’s Pass.” After spending all day panic protecting Suki, he tells her that he lost someone, but doesn’t go much further into detail, just saying that he can’t when she tries to kiss him. Of course, this is all happening in front of the moon. Again, though, Sokka stays vague. He doesn’t tell her any details.
“The Puppetmaster,” Toph posits that maybe the moon spirit has gone mean and is kidnapping people. Sokka snaps at her, in a moment definitely meant for laughs, saying, “The Moon Spirit is a gentle, loving lady. She rules the sky with compassion and ... lunar goodness!” It is a funny moment, but here’s what we can take from it: Toph doesn’t know about Yue. Toph is a Feral Bastard a lot of the time, but she also knows where the line is, and I don’t think she’d’ve said that if she’d known.
“Boiling Rock,” in arguably the most quoted (and well deservedly so!) line in the entire show. “My first girlfriend turned into the moon.” “...that’s rough, buddy.” COMEDIC GOLD. Also, weirdly, the literal only time that Sokka explicitly tells someone about Yue in the course of the show.
“Ember Island Players” which I haven’t hit in my rewatch yet, but I definitely remember a moment where Suki asks Sokka when he was gonna tell her he made out with the moon, and he tearfully shushes her. Again, played for laughs, but the implication is that he still hasn’t told Suki about what happened.
This plays perfectly into the same way that Sokka (doesn’t) talks about his mom. When the Bad Feelings come, Sokka either avoids them and finds a distraction (Goofs with Aang--see, told ya we’d come back to that) or stays silent. When someone explicitly asks him about the Bad Feelings--what he saw in the swamp, what’s eating at him in “Sokka’s Master,” why he’s panic-protecting Suki--he’ll answer, but often talks around the actual issue. (Interestingly, it’s in regard to Suki we see the most explicit manifestation of Sokka grieving as Azula taunts him during the invasion: he cries, he attacks Azula, he yells and questions her despite the fact he knows she’s wasting their time. I think this one hits him because, as this beautiful post points out, Suki’s the protector in the relationship, and Sokka can actually chill out for 2 seconds. But he let his guard down, and Azula got Suki. Anyway. That’s probably a different essay: back to the matter at hand.) We even see this in “Boiling Rock.” There’s a moment where they think Hakoda is not with the other political prisoners. Sokka’s tense, drawn tight, but the only thing he says is, “No.”
Basically, we’ve got Katara, who grieves loudly and rages and is kinda like white-water rapids that churn and churn and churn. And we’ve got Sokka, who, to quote John Mulaney, looks at his grief and says, “I’ll just keep all my emotions right here and then one day I’ll die.” Iceberg grief, to keep the water metaphor going.
And where did these come from? Yup! Water Tribe gender roles! What we know from the show is that, while the South is typically more progressive (women can train as benders and marry who they want, at least) than the North, it’s still very rigid: the men are warriors/hunters/protectors, the women stay home to cook/clean/child-rear.
Now: subtext! And why I think they are this way!
We’ll start with Katara. The last waterbender in the South Pole. She no doubt grew up doted on. If I say she’s most likely a little spoiled, I don’t mean it in a bad way--I mean it in a she’s the last living remnant of this aspect of their culture kind of way. When raiders come, she’s probably the first priority to protect. Kya dies to keep her safe. Her needs are generally put before the community as a whole. (This isn’t to say that Katara doesn’t contribute or care about her community, because she 100% does). But! Especially in Book 1, we see Katara often considering her opinions as facts (trusting Jet, the waterbending scroll) and doesn’t always pause to consider the larger impact that her actions will have (scroll and Jet again, challenging Pakku, dressing up as the Painted Lady despite the fact the factory will hold the village responsible). And many of these actions are good! But we see a lot of Katara being pretty self-centered--what can I do, how does this impact me, how do I feel about this? And this isn’t a bad thing! This aspect of her character makes her complicated and complex! Katara loves her family and protecting people and caring for them! She’s extremely empathetic! But she also struggles to meet people where they’re at when they emote in a different way than she does (see: her clashes with Toph, her initial problems with Zuko joining the group, the above interaction with Sokka). It’s also worth talking about how Katara witnessed her mother’s death, which no doubt makes her grief about it a sharper thing.
Then, again, Sokka. Also loved in his community! But a normal kind of love, I’d assume. He probably was raised on stories of the Fire Nation dragging waterbenders away. No one exemplifies the Water Tribe ride-or-die mentality quite as well as Sokka, or the gender roles of the man as the warrior/protector, so you gotta believe Hakoda raised that kid to look after his sister at all costs, which we see throughout the show (already preparing to go after Aang in the South Pole because he know Katara’s going anyway, “You burned my sister!”) And he isn’t there when his mom dies. He finds out later. He goes from feeling like a victor who helped chased the raiders away to the worst realization of his life. I have to imagine he’s ashamed by the fact that he thought everything was going to be okay, which leads into his worldview of assuming that nothing is okay ever in any circumstance.
Finally, Hakoda. Who never, unless I’ve forgotten something, talks about Kya. All we know is that their family fell apart after her death (per Sokka in “The Runaway,” learning how Katara stepped up to hold everything together) and sometime after he took the warriors and straight up left. He apologizes for leaving but doesn’t address the fact that he left Katara and Sokka with no parents at all, only the war. This is, uh, not exactly echoing a healthy coping mechanism?
My theory: Kya dies. Since the Water Tribe is so embedded in gender roles, Hakoda probably shut down and/or checked out emotionally for a while. This leaves his kids on their own to deal with their shit, and we learn Katara does everything she can to keep her family going. As the most protected individual in the South, Katara’s probably been taught that emotions equal attention, and uses her temper/caring/sadness to help bring her community closer. Meanwhile, Sokka, who hero worships his dad, watches Hakoda go stoic and learns that “real men” shove their shit down. Additionally, Katara’s grief is deafeningly loud, and Sokka’s number 1 role is to keep Katara safe. He’s taught that the Bad Feelings only get in the way and make things worse, and so he learns to be fine no matter what kind of terrible is going down around him.  Basically, Katara learns to use grief as a needle and thread, and Sokka learns to bury it as deep as he can and avoid it at all costs. Opposite reactions to the same trauma. Katara gets mad and demands to be heard and listened to and seen, and Sokka gets sarcastic and prepares himself for the day the Fire Nation ships come back for his sister.
So. Back to those above lines from “Southern Raiders.”
From a writing standpoint, I do wish the final moment was between Katara and Sokka versus Katara and Aang. They could’ve had an almost identical interaction, but it would’ve been more nuanced. I don’t think that Katara needed to apologize, but I think we needed some acknowledgement from both of them: Katara continuing the lesson she’s learned about how her pain doesn’t entitle her to hurt other people (including Sokka, who is there no matter what she says or does), and Sokka that Katara’s process of grieving had to involve this catharsis.
Or. Maybe not. Because again--subtext. Their grief works in such different ways that I have to imagine this isn’t a new fight. It was probably brutal and vicious for a very long time. Maybe that’s part of what made Sokka try and go with the warriors. Maybe that’s part of why Katara gets mad so quickly in the first episode of the show. But eventually, unable to find an answer, they just...stop talking about it. Because the two of them don’t talk about it. Katara only talks about her mom with people who aren’t Sokka, and Sokka does exclusively to Toph and Zuko.
The only time I can think of Katara and Sokka talking about it together is the exchange at the top of this post, and it gets ugly fast, and it isn’t brought up again. It’s a fight that will never be resolved, because they fundamentally can’t react to one another in a way that can be universally understood.
“You didn’t love her the way I did!” Katara yells, loudly, because if Sokka loved her then why isn’t he raging? Why isn’t he getting his sword and coming to help her? Why doesn’t Sokka want to burn this firebender to the ground and make him see and hear and look at what he’s done to the world? To their family? He must not understand. He must not care as much or he’d be screaming with her.
“Katara,” Sokka says, much quieter, and adds nothing else. Not because there isn’t anything else to say, but because Sokka can’t talk about this kind of thing. Not doesn’t want to, but can’t, because it’s his job to protect people, protect Katara, and if he lets all those old hurts come boiling up he can’t do that, because that ends with losing focus and losing control and people getting hurt or going away. Why can’t she understand that?
And then they do what they always do. They don’t bring it up again.
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Cooking (Denki x fem!reader)
Pairing(s): Denki x fem!reader
Warning(s): cussing, smut/18+ (minors DNI), sucking d*ck, switch Denki, mentions of ADHD
Word Count: 2,465
A/N (IMPORTANT ONE): everyone in this story is aged up to the 19, UA is a college in this AU but everything else is the same. So they are NOT minors and they are freshman in college!
A/N: request are always so pen so go ahead and drop on by, either leave the request in my inbox OR toy are more then welcome to message me if you want more detail or just want to get to know me :)
Playlist I made so you can listen to coming while reading this: https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6KD7SsmFn8QM4bp3BP6DCV_ML1B2AZC3
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You laid on the couch, relaxed and in a comfortable position where anything can happen. You where watching this new anime called Demon Slayer that Mina recommend to you. Saying something along the lines of his hit the guys where. Honestly, you didn’t get the hype, but it was pretty entertaining and you didn’t have anything else better to do then to study and actually get work done so why the hell not? Little did you know a little spark plug was about to attack you. That little spark plug going by the name of Denki Kaminari. He was annoying as fuck and you didn’t want him around. But he kept coming back for more so you let him in your life and you guy’s had this little friends-with-benefits thing going on.
“BOO!” Denki screamed on the top of his lungs, you jumped in fear and got your quirk ready. Your breath coming out in short puffs as you stared at the honey eyed boy.
“You shit head! I was at a scary scene!” You hissed, slapping Denki on the back of his head like Bakugou’s Mom did to him from time-to-time when the bakusquad was over at the angry blonde’s house.
“Sorryyy!” Denki wined, rubbing his head slightly as he mumbled some cussing under his breath. You rolled your y/e/c eyes before staring at the blonde again.
“What do you want?” You asked, annoyance filling your voice and clicking your judgement slightly. The screams of Tanjiro still ringing from the TV.
“Well I had this ADHD burst of energy and I will want to bake a cake but I can’t do it alone because if I do it alone then I will make a mess and then I will clean it up and then I will start cleaning and then—“ Denki kept on rambling about this whole chain of effects that would happen if you didn’t bake with him. You rolled your eyes and stared him straight in his bright electric yellow eyes. You paused for a moment, thinking of ways to shut the teenage male up. A idea popped in your head as you smirked and grabbed the back of Denki’s neck and drawing him towards your lips. Leaning in closer and kissing his slightly puffy lips. He was wearing the same cherry chapstick that you commented that smelled good before you noticed that Denki liked you. You always guessed that this was a way for Denki to get you to notice him. The kids went on for a few minutes before you took over and pushed him on his back against the couch. The blonde gasped between the kiss, his eyes started to water a little at the sudden reaction. Before things to get out of hand you broke the kiss and smiled at the blonde. Keeping a poker face on as you pulled away and swiped away the drool that was connected the two of your mouth’s. You giggled a little, a cocky smile dragging across your face.
“Shut up…” You leaned in and whispered into Denki’s ear, biting his ear lobe a little and giggling a little as Denki choked back a moan that was forcing it’s way up his throat.
“Y-yes ma’am…” Denki whimpered submissively, his lip quivering slightly as you let go of his ear and going towards the dorm room kitchen. Denki followed you like a lost puppy dog, he would be a good little puppy. You chuckled slightly at the joke that you made up in your head.
“What type of cake do you want to bake?” You prompted, getting the pantry open and seeing what cake mixes you guy’s had and if you needed to go get in a car and drive to the gas ration at this god forbidden hour.
“Oooh chocolate!” Denki cheered, a childish smile plastered across his face as he bounced up and down. You chuckled and looked across the pantry to see if you guy’s had any chocolate.
“Well,” you started to say, smacking you lips and staring at the pantry with a disappointment look on your face. “Crap.”
“What?”
”We don’t have any chocolate cake mix.”
“Shit.”
You closed the pantry door and went towards your dorm room to grabs out jacket and skateboard. “Wait dude, did you customize your skateboard?” Denki awed as he stared at your Haikyuu inspired skateboard that had Bokuto on it. You nodded your head ‘yes’ and fully pulled on a y/f/c hoodie.
“Yeah, I started customizing skateboard’s over the summer when we graduated UA” You answered Denki’s question fully and explained it. A smile on your face as you glanced back at the blonde-and-black haired male as he ran to grab his yellow hoodie and skateboard. His late board looked plainer then yours but that is probably because he used it more then you did. You smiled brightly at Denki before going outside of the dorms. Denki spoked followed and the two of you started skating down the street.
”We should do this more!” Denki exclaimed, a playful smirk on his face as he started to do more tricks on the skateboard. You laughed at Denki and started video him for a tiktok. The tiktok was of him singing the lyrics of Alien Boy and having a blast of his time.
“You’re such a dork…” You scoffed as you stopped recording the tiktok and editing it. Not even having to look up to know the way where the gas station was.
“Can you send me the tiktok?” Denki requested, you looked at him and gave him a ‘are you serious?’ Look before agreeing with a nod of your head and sending the tiktok to him the moment you posted it. You guy’s started to skate more, trying to impress the other guy doing some more tricks. But soon, you got to the gas station and stopped the both of your skateboards and set hem down on the outside red brick wall. You and Denki imminently went to the candy section and got some chocolate box cake along with some different flavors of monster. You bought for everything.
“Did you get everything you where looking for?” The cashier asked, looking at the two of you and smiling tiredly.
“Yeah we did, thanks!” You chirped, getting out your card and paying for the stuff. Denki grabbed the monster and opened it up as you guy’s grabbed the skateboard the started heading out the front door. Laughing at dumb jokes that you guys cracked with each other.
*when you two got to the dorm’s because I know y’all waiting for the 18+ part you sinners*
Denki and you started following the directions, baking the cake and putting it in the oven and setting the timer for a hour. “There!” You declared, pumping your fist up in the air. Luckily you guy’s could be as loud as you wanted due to the fact that it is Spring Break and everyone went to there parents house. Well everyone but you and Denki. Your parents never wanted you to begin with, from the very start, they made it very clear that they didn’t want you. So why would you want to got there? Of course the bakusquad knows this. The plan was that everyone I the bakusquad was going to stay so you won’t have to to alone in the dorms but everyone seemed to have plans.
Crimson Riot had a book signing contest so Kirishima just had to go catch up on that, he seemed to be very upset to at he left you and promised that he would call you every night and FaceTime you for hours upon hours. Well, you checked your phone every second it seemed for the past two days and still no sign of Kirishima.
Bakugou’s parents got into a fight and they got a divorce so Bakugou had to go home for that. He didn’t seem to sad or caught up about it, although, you swore to yourself that you heard sobs coming from Bakugou’s dorm room after he told you over text that he couldn’t stay. So far he has texted you every once and a while and checked on you, made sure you where taking care of yourself.
Mina was going to a party and didn’t really seem to care that she was leaving you alone. Not that she was petty or anything she just never seemed to mind if she dropped her plans when they involved you. She gave you a couple of drunk text but nothing more and nothing less.
Sero didn’t talk to you about the thing, he said he would be there for you but he left you alone so you didn’t know where he was. Although, from what his Instagram story told you, he has in Disney with his family and having the trike of his life.
Jiro got her first new hit for a album of her song covers and needed to leave you. It was very emotional and you could tell that she didn’t want to leave you alone but she had to since her family was struggling and she wanted to make them proud.
But Denki stayed with you, the whole time, there was not a time that you thought ‘oh, Denki isn’t going to be there for me’ or ‘oh, I can’t count on Denki to be here’ because he always was and he always will be right by your side. Ever since the two of you where kids and Denki first got his quirk, you still remember that day, he went to hug his best friend but accidentally shocked him and the kid died of electrocution. He cried for hours and hours in class and (from what you heard) in his own home. Refusing to hug anybody until he got into middle school and you came along. You guys had known each other due to your parents working together in the same hero agency but you never started building a friendship until middle school. A lot of people say that relationships end in middle school and high school but in reality. That is when Denki and yours started to bloom.
“Remember when you first got your quirk?” You popped up, laughing a little as the tips of Denki’s ears turned a flush red.
“HEY I THOUGHT WE AGREED TO NEVER TALK ABOUT THAT!” Denki pouted, crossing his arms and trying to be mad at you.
“Oh ok…I am sorry…” You whispered in a pretend hurt voice, knowing full well that Denki will come crawling back to you once you had the slight hurt tone in your voice.
“Wait no! Baby!! Come here!!” Denki exclaimed, wrapping you in a warm hug, you burst into laughter and hugged Denki back. Feeling bad for the honey eyed male for the millionth time in your life (no but like seriously, how did this man get you to feel bad about everything?)
“Its fine Denki.” You reassured the worried teenager with some pats on the head and a kiss on the forehead. Denki smiled innocently at you before pushing you against the couch. “Oof!” You gasped as you felt he fabric press against your back. Denki smirked in accomplishment.
“GOT YOU!” Denki declared proudly, trying to pin you down on your back. You cocked your brow up slightly and flipped you and Denki over so you where on top and he was on bottom. Denki whined and bit his lip, eyes looking at you in a pleading sort of way. You smirked seductively and leaned down to kiss Denki. Your lips crashing with his, biting the male’s slightly pink lips to ask for entrance (which he obeyed instantly). You slipped your tongue into the wet cavern of Denki’s mouth and started exploring every inch of it and sucking on his tongue a little bit. Denki moaned into the kiss and started grinding his body against your pants and whining like a submissive bitch. You chuckled darkly and brought your hand to mess with his hair before yanking his hair and making him break the kiss. A string of saliva connected your two mouths and you just swiped it off and shoved your fingers inside of Denki. Smiling slightly as he gagged.
“Want me to suck your dick slut?” Your horse whisper sounded in Denki’s ear as you bite his ear lobe and tugged on it slightly. Denki nodded his head ‘yes’ before letting out a string of moans. You smirked in accomplishment of breaking the presumably top nineteen year old who flirted with all the girls at school. You pulled down Denki’s sweatpants and boxers in one Swift motion all while keeping eye contact with him. Going down on your knee’s you opened your mouth and started sucking Denki off. Your tongue swirling around his head as you slowly started going deeper and deeper until you felt it go to the back of your throat. Once you felt that your head bobbed up and down, Denki moaned loudly and threw his head back in pure pleasure. Mumbling out praises and barely forming a sentence. You smiled to yourself as you reached down and started rubbing circles along your clit, you tongue almost lolling out to the side of Denki’s duck at the pleasure of hitting the sweet spot.
“You’re such a girl girl yeah you suck my dick yeah you suck that duck so well yeah you do…” Denki managed to say before moaning loudly again at the sight of you touching your self and sucking him off. He is in complete heaven. You felt Denki’s thighs tense up around your head and you stared up at him. Expecting him to say something. “I’m gonna cum…!” Denki mumbled out before moaning again and letting his sex face out. You moaned around Denki’s dick and that caused both of you to cum at the same time. You guy’s where a panting mess on the floor. Denki had his legs spread wide and your head was all fuzzy and not cleared out with good thoughts. You guy’s stood there, a few comfortable in the air as both of you where a shaking mess. Soon, you got up and carried Denki to the other corner of the couch and grabbed a large fluffy gray blanket along with some large pillows. On nights like these, Denki liked it if you took charge in the aftercare stuff. Not even letting you two get changed until the morning. You smiled warmly at the goofy blonde who laid there on the couch, almost fast asleep, while you played Death Note (he says it is to scary so you like watching it when he is asleep or cuddling with you).
“Hey baby?”
“What’s up Pikachu?”
“Did we ever get that cake out of the oven?”
“…”
“…”
“Shit.”
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sorryimanon · 4 years
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Character: Katsuki Bakugou
Warnings/tags: heart warming fluff, language, and suggestive themes
Word count: 2.5k
In which your boyfriend takes it upon himself to pamper you on his day off.
Author’s note: some self indulgent fluff. this is a continuation of dad!bakugou and torch daughter. there will be more. enjoy :)
D/N= daughters name
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Katsuki heavily relied on you to babysit your rambunctious four year old daughter during the days when he'd be on patrol from dusk till dawn. Very rarely would he be home before the two of you tucked yourselves in for the night, leaving him to eat the leftovers from dinner alone at the table. As sad as it is, it didn't bother you in the slightest. In fact, knowing Katsuki was keeping the crime rate of Japan low, you were more than happy to become a stay at home mom. Most of your friends tried to talk you out of it, but you were already settled after giving your two weeks notice at your low paying job. Waking up and seeing your daughter first thing in the morning is better than staring blankly at a bright screen all day behind a musty wall, running on nothing but decaf coffee, and sluggishly going to and fro like a zombie.
Ever since your daughter manifested her quirk, you’ve been trying your best to maintain her sudden outbursts while at home. The doctor prescribed it as Torch: the ability to become a human torch and ignite flames throughout your body and fingertips. For now d/n is only capable of setting herself on fire, using the flames as a barrier to protect her from any harm instead of combating. However, sometimes she'll forget to extinguish herself, having you to manually use an actual fire extinguisher on her. Burn marks would litter the outskirts of your shirts, the aftermath ash smudged on your face, and the tiny hairs on your forearms long gone after handling d/n.
Your boyfriend appreciates the way how you compose yourself around d/n, not allowing the temptation to fling the little gremlin out the window prevail, because if the roles were reversed it'd be a whole different story. Sometimes he sits back in his desk chair, after a long night of meandering around the city, and tries to remember the last time you were properly treated. Of course, Katsuki never fails to remind you day and night he loves you through his actions, some including selfish indulgence late at nights, but all in all he didn't lack being the hopeless romantic counterpart for you. He wanted you to take a break from it all, have him handle the at home duties and the slimy daughter. Leaning back against the chair with his brows furrowed slightly, he began to mentally plan out your day already.
It was a Friday when Katsuki forced himself out of the comfortable security that is your arms and walked with light feet to his daughters bedroom. Today is his day off, so he has to make sure everything goes smoothly or else he's going to have more burn marks on his office desk.
He didn't bother knocking first and saunters in the familiar space, the faint snores from d/n somehow relaxing him. Her walls were freshly painted a light shade of blue, the contrast not too saturated to peel the attention away from her posters that covered every inch of her room, all of which were pictures of his prohero colleagues. D/N had to beg for her father to purchase a Deku poster, one of which she saw don display when the both of you brought her to the mall for a quick trip. He internally cringes every time he makes eye contact with the lifeless eyes of Deku when he enters her room.
Katsuki neared his daughter and kneeled down to where his head was leveled with hers, chuckling lightly when finding a small pool of drool collecting on her cheek.
"Wake up little shit," he whispers, nudging her uncovered shoulder with his knuckles, startling her eyes to flutter open. D/n nearly gasped at the sight of her father. The covers that were wrapped snuggly around her fell at the foot of her bed when she jolted up in surprise, eyes brimming with excitement.
"It's today right? Mommy's day!" Katsuki covered her mouth with his abnormally large hand, not wanting her obnoxious voice to blow their cover.
"Yes, but you're gonna have to be quiet for daddy. Don't want to spoil the surprise for mommy, you understand ya little brat?"
Hand still attached to her mouth, d/n nodded her head feverishly, hands clenched into tiny fits. Once he thinks she's shimmered down a little, he finally removes his hand and motions her to follow him.
Meanwhile in the other room, you were still fast asleep, limbs not once switching from their position over the cozy blanket. The chill breeze from the propped window regulated your body temperature nicely, along with the beautiful songs sung by the birds that reside in the trees close by. You stirred awake momentarily, feeling the loss of a presence that's usually laying beside you during these times of slumber. Katsuki's side was empty, the indent from his body molded onto the foam mattress, leaving you to believe he woke up not that long ago.
After convincing yourself to leave the comfort of your bed, you decided to search for the missing blonde. You crack open the door to a weird combination of radio music blaring throughout the house, and the delicious smell of something cooking in grease. It's no doubt your boyfriends doing. He always likes to impress you with how skillful he is in the kitchen. He hasn't made a dish you disliked yet nor will he allow himself to do so.
Standing side by side, minus the height difference, d/n and Katsuki both were too immersed in their cooking to notice you leaning against the island counter, trying very hard to not cry instantly at the sight in front of you. Watching them interact together was definitely something you'd be treasuring for the years to come.
A rush of savory and sweetness infiltrated your senses, the scent strong enough to knock you back to sleep. As if he read your mind overnight, Katsuki took it upon himself to prepare your favorite breakfast dishes. The dinner table made for three already set by none other than d/n, who currently looked proud at her work and craftsmanship. A large vase was propped in the center, a collection of vibrant flowers stuffed to the brim, the water inside almost overflowing. Attached to one of the stems of the flowers was a tag, the handwriting sloppy and hard to decipher.
To my dumbass, love ya - K.B
You felt the delicate touch of your daughter wrapping her hand around yours, giving it a slight tug before pulling you into the kitchen again. Katsuki flicked his gaze to you now, flashing the same mischievous grin you grew to love. his hands simultaneously worked on the food while taming the animal, that is indeed your daughter, from bumping into the pan handles.
"What's all this for?" You asked, the question directly appointed to both your boyfriend and daughter.
"Oh, so I can't treat my sexy girlfriend to a good meal?" he teased while setting the burners to low, letting the food cool off before plating it. Your daughter audibly gagged at the comment and swatted Katsuki's arm.
D/N's tiny legs were faster than yours and reached the cabinet where the plates and cutlery were stored at. To her dismay, the cabinet was higher than she anticipated. trying her best to waiver down the disappointment as she climbed on the sleek marble counter top, losing her footing here and there. Katsuki caught her in time before she misplaced her footing and almost toppled onto the floor.
"May I need to remind you not to climb on the damn counter tops anymore d/n?" he scolded as he put her down before grabbing enough plates for everyone.
Pursing her lips tightly, she crossed her arms and said, "But if I'm going to be a future hero then I have to battle my way through tough obstacles!"
U.A's immense training and work studies came in handy when dealing with d/n's hard headed ideologies. It's been a stressful reoccurrence, having to constantly teach her the importance of being a hero at such a young age. Her impulsive tendencies mirrored the blondes old habit of taking action before thinking. But there was always a saying when storing away your fear and facing danger head on.
"That's true, but sometimes a little teamwork wouldn't hurt. Your father should know a thing or two about that when he was a young U.A student," you said as you patted her head.
"What'd you say shitty woman? Talking crap so early in the morning already?" a strange popping sound alerted you to turn around, only to find Katsuki flaring his flashy quirk with a glare that could splice you open.
But his alarming gaze wasn't the thing that was scaring you at the moment.
"WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT USING YOUR QUIRK IN THE HOUSE! YOU'RE GONNA SET OFF THE FIRE ALARM AGAIN, IDIOT!"
-
You thought the smorgasbord of a breakfast was the last of your boyfriends romantic gestures, but you should've known better once he demanded you to change out of your sleep attire and into something to  wear outside. Not thinking twice about where he was dragging you to, including daughter, you decided to play it safe. He approved on your choice of ripped jeans, synthetic tank top, and thrown on cardigan once heading off to the car.
The car ride to the mysterious destination was short lived as your boyfriend pulled up into the driveway of his old house. Mitsuki stood waiting by the threshold of the doorway, waving her fingers sweetly to whom you can only assume was you and not her only son. She stepped off the porch once Katsuki shifted the car in park, unlocking the doors as well. His mother reached the side where d/n stayed strapped in her seat and yanked the door open.
"Ah my little princess! How have you been? I missed you so much!" She unbuckled d/n's seat belt and flattened her in a tight hug, squeezing till her eyes popped out. "I can't wait to spend the weekend with you baby girl! Are you excited to have a little fun with grandma?!"
"Calm the fuck down, you're gonna kill her if you keep squeezing!" Katsuki's voice boomed out of the window.
"Oh pipe down you little shit I'm not harming her! Also don't talk to me like that! You're old enough to treat me with some respect by now!"
"SHUT UP YOU OLD HAG! JUST TAKE THE LITTLE GREMLIN AND GO!"
After the heated exchange, Katsuki eventually calmed down and drove the two of you back to the house in complete silence. It was quite a shift in a sense of environment wise. By now d/n would be begging you to make her some pudding or pour her a cup of lemonade, then place yourselves in front of the tv watching a random kids program till evening. Tonight you lend the torch to your boyfriend, allowing whatever devious plan he conjured up to unfold.
Before you could shuffle into your shared bedroom, Katsuki placed his calloused hands onto your cramped shoulders. Merely centimeters from your ear, he laid a chaste kiss on the area beneath it, smiling at your innocent reaction to his sudden actions and nuzzled into the crook of your neck. You smelt the familiar scent of caramel and men’s soap, both of which you undoubtably loved when combined.
“Suki?” Upon hearing his nickname, Katsuki quirked an eyebrow at you. “What’s with all the romantic gestures lately? Cooking my favorite breakfast, the flowers, and our daughter. Don’t get me wrong, I love her! It’s just nice not to worry about if she’ll set the curtains on fire again.”
You felt the vibrations of him chuckling behind you.
“Isn’t it obvious? I just want to fuck the shit out of you,” you sat paralyzed by his bluntness. his tuft hair tickled the underside of your chin, earning him an acute giggle from you. “I’m just kidding, pretty face. I figured you needed a weekend where you just relax and did nothing. Let me do all the work. That’s including getting rid of the brat.”
Shifting in his arms to where you can face him, you can now see the adoration oozing from usual heated glare of his vermillion eyes, the scowl long gone and replaced with a soften feature not so many from the outside can witness. To think this was the man you devoted yourself and love for, to allow him to bare witness anything and everything you endure. He’s a man of showing his compassion through his actions, not lousy words of affirmations that anyone could sputter out and proclaim its love. No, he reflects back everything right with the world, even when you felt the weight of it searing through your system, dragging it down with you. The same explosive blonde awaits patiently by the opening for you to enter, no matter how long it’ll take for you to accept his love. Because he’ll be there. Waiting.
And here he is waiting. In your arms to repeat those three words you made out from watching the movement of his lips.
The words leave your mouth effortlessly, the proclamation hanging in the air between you two.
“I love you too, Katsuki. Thank you so much, for everything.” Like so, you kiss the plump flesh of his lips, the same inflammation of your heart burning as before. The strong muscle of his tongue prods your entrance, practically begging by licking your bottom lip. Katsuki grabbed your chin as gentle as he could muster, titling it for a better leverage to explore your mouth in return. Your hands trailed across the defining shape of his collarbones, rubbing any part of his body so that your fingers remained busy. Both of you hum in satisfaction, relishing in the feeling of the intimate moment. To your disliking, he removes his lips from yours and hovers instead, panting from the mini-make out session seconds ago.
“I’m going to marry you some day, mark my words. So don’t act fucking stupid when I pop the question,” he hotly proclaims, not once removing those piercing red eyes from yours. That’s when you knew he wasn’t bullshitting. If there’s one thing you learned about Katsuki over the years of dating, is that he doesn’t throw out promises in the air nonchalantly without keeping them. You can vaguely hear the ominous sound of wedding bells in your ears.
“Sounds intriguing. I always wanted to see you in a suit and tie.”
“Ya know, maybe someday might be tomorrow-.”
You cut him off with a scorching peck, making his eyes widen and dilate with every given second you laid your lips onto his. “Shut up babe and ravish me already.”
A mischievous grin forms on his mouth as he links his arms around the back of your knees and hoists you over his shoulder. He erupted into fits of laughter after hearing you squeak from the abruptness. The door to your shared bedroom came into view, your boyfriend kicking it with his free foot before entering through the threshold.
“You’re in for a long night sweetheart. Now that our daughter isn’t here, I’m not holding back on anything,” he threatens as he lays you down on the comforter.
Another thing you learned from your relationship. Katsuki is always true to his word.
-
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skellebonez · 3 years
Note
How #67 with Mei and her parents? don't see much content with them. - Pixel Anon
Considering we haven't seen Mei's parents since episode 3 and we have no idea what their relationship is actually like now, I decided to do some canon-divergence and have them take initiative to be more involved in Mei's life. And since it’s fathers day... eh, why not do a little something with her dad in particular since I never really write her parents? (I got another anon for a fill involving Mei and her dad, but unfortunately Tumblr seems to have ghosted it into the ether, and i fused it into this one.)
My father may look like the scary one, but it’s my mother you need to be afraid of.
"Uh... hi mom?" Mei said in surprise, looking around when she heard the sound of someone clearing their throat from behind her and finding that it was indeed the two of them alone in the garage. "Where's dad?"
"He's a little tied up in business, but he’s home," Mrs. Long said with a sigh, moving to stand behind her daughter and look down at her project with a look of confusion and mild dismay. "What... are you working on, dear?"
Mei looked down at her current state, coated in engine oil and grease with scattered parts of one of the many many cars laying around her. Like a gutted fish but much shiner and louder.
“Oh, uh...” Mei started with an awkward chuckle. “After, you know, the whole break in and everything I’ve been fixing up some of the cars that were still mostly in one piece and, uh...” she gestured to the one in front of her, jazz hands waving slightly enthusiastically. “Ta da?”
“... Oh!” Mrs. Long said when she registered what Mei meant, a small smile finally forming on her face. “You didn’t need to do that on your own, Mei, but...” She moved forward, inspecting the car with a careful gaze. “This is quite impressive! You’d never know it was damaged at all. I thought...” She frowned again, looking back to her daughter. “Well, I thought you were only interested in motorcycles so I wasn’t expecting this.”
“Oh no!” Mei laughed, wiping her hands on her work overalls. “Motorcycles are my specialty, but I know enough about most vehicles to give them some good care!” There was an odd expression on her mother’s face that fell over her at these words, something far off and somewhat sad. “Mom? You ok?”
“Yes,” her mom replied, just a bit too fast before she smiled again. “Actually, I think your father was almost finished when I came in to check in on you. He wanted to talk to you himself, why don’t you see if he’s done? He should be in the tea room.”
“... sure...” Mei said slowly, bending down to start picking up parts before her mom placed a hand on her shoulder.
“Don’t worry, dear, just leave those there in case you want to come back later. Just... change into clean clothes and wash your hands for now.”
Now... that was odd. Mei’s parents had always been clear on keeping the house as tidy as possible once you needed to leave a room (barring her own bedroom). But ever since that one Bull Clone (General Ironclad she thought she heard Red Son call him once) broke into her house for the Dragon Blade her parents had been acting different. Not extremely different, but noticeably so.
But instead of bringing this up Mei nodded to her mother and headed to wash up.
~
“Dad?” Mei called out, cleaned up from her car repairs and in clean clothes once again. “Mom said you wanted to talk to me?”
He was right where her mother had said he would be, in the tea room. Strewn about in front of him were papers upon papers, some seeming to be insurance forms for the multitude of broken objects strewn about the house and others repair bills. She was certain some of them, all on one side of the table, were research papers of some kind. And sitting at a seat in the middle of the long table was her father, small space cleared before him as he drank a fresh hot cup of tea. There was another, equally fresh cup across from him.
“Ah, Mei!” Her father said brightly, but there was an odd tenseness to his tone. “Yes, come in, sit down! There are a few things that we need your input on.”
Well that was vague as hell. But Mei did as requested, taking the seat across from him and picking up the tea before her. “I wouldn’t think this is something you’d be doing here in the... tea room.”
“Yes, well,” her father shrugged, glowering down at the paperwork with a sigh. “Sometimes you put aside convention to be comfortable. And with my office out of commission this is a much more relaxing place to work on papers than the dining room. If I don’t replace those chairs as soon as possible remind me how uncomfortable they are!” He shuddered dramatically, the action making Mei relax just a tad bit. The chairs had always been uncomfortable, she and her mother had told him as much before, but the three of them had never sat in them long enough for them to become bothersome. “But that’s something to worry about later! First, the main reason I wanted to talk to you...”
He put down his cup, reaching over to grab some paperwork on the right side of the table and slide it to her.
“As you know most of our cars in our collection were not salvageable after the break in.” Mei tensed a bit at that, frowning down at the paperwork in front of her. And her eyes widened. “And, well, we never really had reason to drive them anyway. Refilling the garage with new cars just seems silly at this point, so your mother and I were talking about possibly restructuring it and making the empty 3/4 of the garage into a sort of...” He paused for a moment, humming before snapping his fingers. “A workshop, I suppose is the correct term! For someone who liked to collect a lot of cars at one point I don’t know much about them, that was always more your mother’s interest even if she always insisted we only needed two. But you’re always working on your motorcycle and I thought giving you that space would be a much more reasonable use for it!”
Mei set her teacup down, picking up the papers as he talked and looking over them with wide eyes.
They were blueprints. For a garage workshop. For her motorcycle. For her.
“I-I!” She sputtered, gesturing to the papers with a shake of her head. “You... but this is-! I don’t-!”
“Mei,” her father said firmly, but gently, holding up one of his hands. “I know that we paid for you to live on your own in your own pent house and that you have a workshop outside as well, but this house is still your home as well! You have a room here, after all. But you don’t have to agree to having a workshop here if you don’t want one, they’re just blueprints at this point, and we can always find other uses for the empty space in the future.”
“... ok, what happened?” Mei asked, deadpan and looking at her father with suspicion. “I mean, I love the idea! I’d love to have a place for my vehicle work here! But ever since the break in you and mom have been acting really weird, dad!”
Mr. Long tensed, looking away from his daughter for a moment before bowing his head to look down into his tea.
“We... had a conversation with Mr. Tang,” Mr. Long said after a moment of silence, making Mei look at him with surprise. “... actually, no, it was more like we were given a lecture by Mr. Tang.” He chuckled, ruffling his hair and looking back up to Mei. “We may have many years on him, but he made us feel like teenagers being yelled at by the principal again. Your mother and I... we realized after your reaction of surprise that we haven’t been the most open and communicative parents. We’ve treated our house like more of a museum than as a home ever since you were a child, and when you moved out and we helped you get everything you had no access to while growing up here... we didn’t realize that it would feel even more so like we were trying to uphold that image.”
“Mr. Tang talked to you about that?” Mei winced, remembering the multiple times she would rant at her family friend who had been there for her since she was just a little girl. Multiple... multiple times. He’d been sworn to secrecy, naturally, but it seemed that this was the last straw for him.
“Yes,” her father confirmed with a nod, twisting his fingers. “We never meant for you to feel unwelcome in your own home, but with how busy we always were and how proud we were of our family history we lost sight of the fact we were. Even if you only stay here when we’re gone to watch the house we want you to feel comfortable, Mei. I can understand if you’re still apprehensive of this, however.”
Whatever Tang has said to the Long family heads must have been something to behold. And Mei couldn’t help but grab the paperwork and move to the side of the table her father sat at, sitting beside him instead of across from him.
“Well for starters, lets make this less ‘business meeting’ and more ‘dad talking to kid’, ok?” She said lightly, laying the papers in front of both of them. “And... car upkeep is more mom’s thing? Since when?” Mei raised a brow with a smirk,
Her father looked at her with surprise before chuckling, moving to half face her and the table with a far more comfortable smile. “She hasn’t really had the time to work on them since well before you were born, but...” he leaned in closer, whispering conspiratorially. “She used to be a street racer too!”
“WHAT!?” Mei exclaimed, covering her mouth when her father raised a finger to his lips in a shushing motion. “Mom was a street racer?”
“One of the best, right around when she was your age too!” Mr. Long laughed, a far off look in his eyes. “You and her have a lot more in common than one would think at first glance. You’re smart, good with vehicles, not to mention our dragon powers are from her side of the family- I only earned my own through being close to her over a long period. Why, sometimes I think the only things you got from me were your skills in video games and amazing sense of hair style!”
“Dad!” Mei laughed, gently shoving her dad’s shoulder tentatively. When he only laughed more at that she softened, relaxing against the table. “Guess I have a lot to learn about you both, huh?
“As long as you want to,” her father offered, spreading the blueprints between the two of them.
"I do,” she agreed, looking over the papers again. They could definitely use some... fine tuning. But they were a good start. “But I guess I was right about one thing!”
“What’s that?”
“Every time someone saw you guys they thought you were the one to be worried about,” she admitted with another chuckle, shaking her head. “I’d always correct them saying ‘my father may look like the scary one, but it’s my mother you need to be afraid of’ and now... well, if mom used to race the way I do on my bike I was way more right than I thought I was.”
“Oh, Mei, your mother was far more reckless than you ever were. You should have seen some of the catastrophes she used to cause.”
“... are they on the internet?”
Her father frowned for a moment before watching the door... and a conspiratorial smirk overtook his face.
“Want to find out together?”
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fiveisnumber1 · 3 years
Text
A Villain In The Making - A Timeless Side Piece
For most people today was just a normal Saturday afternoon. They walked about the city, they ran their errands, they just existed. You on the other hand, you sat around in your room anxiously waiting for your friends to return. The academy kids had left a few days ago to go fight some crazy scientist in France named Gustave Eiffel and Sir Reginald even took Vanya with them this time leaving you to yourself. You could recall the day they had left since it was only a few days ago. You were peacefully playing a game of chess with Five when the sound of an alarm started to blare.
“Ugh, another mission?” Five questioned annoyed
This would be the third one in a row that he and his siblings had in the last week. He was getting tired of having to up and leave all the time especially since he only got to see you once you were finished with school during the week. And even then he now had to split his time with you with his six other siblings. This was awful. You saw the disappointed and annoyed look on Five’s face and knew that he didn’t want to go.
“I'm sorry this keeps happening.” 
“This is the third time our chess game has been interrupted by some mission.” Five complained
“Maybe we should try playing checkers next time?” You jokingly suggested
You could see as a smirk start to form upon Five’s face as he replied,
“I don’t think chess is the cause for all these missions.”
“You never know!” You remarked
“There is a chance, however slim, that it might be the cause. That does not change the fact that I don’t want to go.” Five retorted
You opened your mouth about to try and comfort your friend but from down the hall you heard the loud shouts of Sir Reginald demanding his children’s presence. Both you and Five looked in the direction of his voice as he shouted,
“Do you not hear the alarm? Our mission is in Paris children, we must leave at once!”
You and Five looked back at each other, both with wide eyes as you processed what he had just said.
“You’re going all the way to Paris?” You stated aloud “I guess you’re going to be gone for a bit then, huh?”
Five felt his stomach drop. You were right, he was going to be gone for a bit. He didn’t want to leave you here though. He didn’t want to leave you at all. Without really thinking Five took your hands in his and suggested,
“You should come with me- with us.”
“Five as much as I would love to take a trip to Paris in the middle of the school year I cannot.” You explain
“Why not?” He asked
“I hate to be the person to remind you of this but my parents care for me and would think I’m kidnapped, Five.” You explain
“Shit, you’re right.” Five said as he pull his hands from you and began to pace back and forth
“Hey, if it will make you feel better maybe you can do something touristy for me while you’re there.”
“Like what?” he inquires, stopping his pacing
“I don’t know, look for people who you think are like us and then do whatever it looks like those other people are doing.” You elaborate 
“Children your lack of urgency is putting the world in danger!” Reginald shouts once more
You and Five look at each other once more realizing that he needed to go. It wasn’t fun but it was just something the both of you had to deal with given the differences in your upbringing. He was raised to be a “hero” and would have to leave to fight on behalf of the world and you were just some kid who lived across the street and still needed to finished her advanced algebra homework. Letting out sigh you quickly wrapped your friend in a tight hug which he reciprocated. As you held each other you could hear the sounds of his siblings starting to run downstairs and knew it was time for him to go. Parting ways you looked at your friend one more time and encouraged,
“Go kick some ass with your siblings. I’ll be waiting here for you when you get back.”
“I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Five replies, giving you a smile
And with that you watched as he flashed away. You turned back towards the chessboard that you had been playing at with Five only moments ago and sat down in your chair. As you were about to start putting the pieces back in their original spots a voice called out from behind you and asked,
“May I finish this game with you?”
Turning to look at the voice you smiled and said,
“Sure Pogo.”
As Pogo took a seat across from you, he mentioned,
“Just because the children aren’t around does not mean you’re not welcome here Miss (Y/N). This might not be your home but I hope it’s a place where you feel like you can belong.”
“Thank you.”
As you came back into focus you heard the sounds of many people chattering. Looking outside your bedroom window you could see as a crowd started to gather behind barricades across the street at the academy with signs in hand. Dozens of fans of the Umbrella Academy were stood outside the manor to wait and watch for the arrival of their favorite super powered kids. You however were just waiting for you friends to get back so you all could hang out again. Wanting to get out of your room and curious as to what all the fuss looked like in person you decided on heading over to the academy as well.  Walking downstairs you called out to your parents,
“I’m going to go meet up with some friends!”
“Alright, sweetie but be back by 8:30 for dinner and remember the third rule!” Your mom called back
“Uh yeah...I will!” You replied as you quickly hurried out the door rushing over to the academy before you could get caught
Carefully you made your way through the crowd and towards the front of the barricade closest to the house. You looked around at all the people who knew nothing of the reality that your friends were going through. It was crazy what a different world they lived in. As you stood behind the barricade waiting like everyone else for the umbrella academy to show up you felt someone push around you. Looking to the right you saw a kid about your age placing a suitcase down on the ground. He looked around frantically as if trying to find something and you could see that he was dressed up in an academy uniform. Not a good one though. It looked like all the materials were constructed out of tape and paper. You attempted to look away from the weird kid before he noticed but it was too late, you had caught his gaze. Trying to not be weird you quickly commented,
“Uh...hi.”
“Hi! I’m Harold.” He says extending his hand
There was something off about this kid but you couldn’t place it.
“...(Y/N),” You replied slowly shaking it “Nice costume.”
“Oh thanks! I made it myself.” He exclaims
“I can see that.” You comment unimpressed
He must’ve noticed your tone because he followed up with,
“I’ll get a better one soon though!”
You were actually a bit impressed by that. The Umbrella Academy uniforms were custom made so to have an accurate replica created would cost a lot of money.
“Your parents must really love you to pay for a custom made uniform.” You say surprised
The kid looked off to the side for a bit after you had mentioned his parents but when he looked back he explained.
“Oh no, I’m going to get one when I join the academy!”
You blinked a few times in confusion. What did he mean when he joins the academy? It’s not like an after school program you could sign up for free to be a part of. For better or for worse the Umbrella Academy was hand picked. Sir Reginald specifically chose kids who fell under the very rare and odd circumstances such as your friends and yourself. Giving the kid an odd look you questioned,
“Join? Not to be rude kid, but what makes you think you can join?”
“Well I was born on October 1st.” He states
“Yeah so was I, but you don’t see me standing in one of those uniforms.” You retorted
“But you can be! We both probably have powers, Sir Hargreeves just needs to help us find them out!” Harold replied excitedly
God these people really had no clue what life was like behind those walls. They knew nothing of how dull and damaging academy life could be. Centering yourself you placed a hand on the kid next to you’s shoulder as you stated,
“Listen, Gerald right?”
“Harold.” He correct
“Whatever. Having powers has downsides, it is not all sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes it can be painful or frustrating or caused unintended harm to yourself or others when they get out of control.” You continued
Instead of a look of contemplation you watched as his eyes lit up.
“So you do have powers?!” He exclaimed
“I never said that.” You replied trying to get him off that topic “I’m just saying this academy isn’t the gift you think it is. You shouldn’t delude yourself because you’re only going to end up hurt.”
“Well, if you don’t want to be in the Umbrella Academy and hang with the coolest people around then suit yourself but I’m going to be living it up with my to be discovered powers and new siblings.” Harold stated
“Uh huh. Sure you are.” You remarked
“Just wait and you’ll see.” He replied
The two of you then went silent as you stood and waited for the academy to appear at their house. The thing was the Umbrella Academy had just arrived. The car had pulled into the back of the house where I could not been seen by the public. Turning from the front seat to look back at the academy, Reginald narrowed his eyes on Vanya and Five.
“Number Seven go in the house and wait in the parlor. Number Five I want you to spatial jump to the front of the house while your siblings and I drive around the block to the front in the car.” Reginald stated
“Why?” Five questioned
It didn’t make sense for him to be here while everyone else arrived later.
“Panem et circenses. Bread and circuses. The more the people are entertained the less questions they ask. Now go.” Reginald commanded
“Fine.” Five replied
Annoyed, Five spatial jumped out of the car and to the front of the house like he was told to do. With a flash he appeared in the middle of the two barricades filled with people. The crowd looked on with awe and excitement as they saw him there. Forcing a smile for the public Five gave a small wave as he looked around. And then, he saw you and a genuine smile came to his face. Pulling something from his pocket he flashed over to you. You didn’t say anything, unsure of how to interact given in this context you looked like another fan in the crowd. Granted, you were a fan of him and the rest of the academy just not in the same way as everyone else. Making the move to speak first Five asked,
“Can I sign your comic?”
“Oh wow! Yeah!” Harold said as pushed you away
Frantically, he tried to pull a comic from his pocket and hand it to Five. This was one of the things he hated most about having fans, they only cared about what they wanted and would put anyone else in harms way to get that. It was disgusting behavior to begin with but even worse that this kid had pushed you. Unhappy with the fact that he had pushed you out of the way Five looked at the boy upset and curtly replied,
“Not you. I was talking to her.”
You knew he wanted to talk to you but the question he had asked didn’t make sense. You didn’t have a comic on you. Curious as to what he meant you asked,
“What comic?”
“The one in your jacket pocket. Right there.” Five points out
Looking down your saw a rolled up comic in your pocket. Pulling the comic out you unrolled it and noticed that it was completely in french. He had gotten this comic and placed it in your pocket just so he could talk to you. Clever.
“Now how did that get there?” You questioned, a playful smirk on your face
“No clue. So can I sign it?” Five replied
“Sure, you can sign my comic.” You remarked sarcastically
You handed the comic back to Five and watched as he made no attempts to find a pen or marker to actually sign the comic. Instead, he stood there on the other side of the barricade, ignoring the rest of the crowd, and just focusing on you.
“So what have you been up to while we’ve been gone?” Five asked
“School mostly.” You replied
“Anything new happen?” He followed
“The new guy who sits behind me keeps picking on me and pulling at my hair.” You stated
Five could feel an anger start to rise in him. He was only gone a few days and someone had the audacity to pick on his best friend. No. Absolutely not, not on his watch. 
“I can do something about it for you.” He firmly states
“Absolutely not.” You retorted
It was annoying that this kid shows up and thinks he can just bother you but it’s not something you couldn’t handle. You were in the process of going through the proper channels at school but if nothing got resolved you had no qualms about handling it yourself. You did not need Five handing it because you knew his handling was the equivalent of a death sentence even if he didn’t cause serious physical harm. The psychological damage from someone with super powers threatening them would be enough to make that kid regret his own birth. 
Harold looked at the conversation between you and Five, and although he felt there was something different about it, that’s not what mattered to him. You had just told a member of the umbrella academy you DIDN’T want their help.
“What he’s a hero, he can totally help with your bully.” Harold interjected
Five looked towards the kid who had pushed you earlier and who was now trying to tell you what he thought was best. Taking a step closer to the barricade he stared Harold down. Lowering his voice in a steady tone he questioned,
“Why are you talking to her?”
Harold couldn’t see Five’s eyes from behind his mask but he could feel his piercing gaze and the tone in which he spoke felt less like a question and more like a threat.
Seeing what was starting to build you tried to redirect Five’s attention back to you by saying,
“Number Five, he’s another fan just like me, remember?”
Five turned to look back at you, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.
“Number Five?” He asked, his voice slightly saddened “What did I do?”
“That’s. your. name.” You tried to remind without openly saying anything
It took a moment but Five was able to pick up on the message you were trying to get across and says,
“Oh-uh yeah...Number Five. Thats’s me.”
 “Anyway...” You continued “Did you do anything touristy in Paris?”
“Actually I did.” Five replies cheerfully “I saw a whole bunch of tourists placing these locks on bridges.”
“Interesting. Why?” You asked
“I don’t know but people kept writing them and their friends names on them so I did it too and wrote me and my best friend’s names.” Five explains “Alli- I mean Number Three kept giggling as I did so though which is odd since she did the same thing with Number One.”
“Weird. I’ll-” You catch yourself before finishing “I mean you’ll have to ask her about it then.” 
As Harold watched the two of you talk he felt a little frustrated. He knew that Number Five didn’t really want to talk to him but he needed to find his way into the academy. Trying to interject her said,
“Excuse me Number Five but I really need to talk to you-”
His words were ignored though as someone loudly shouted,
“They're coming! I think I see their car!”
You and Five look towards the street before you looked back to him. You knew that his father didn’t send him out here to talk to you and you worried how he would react if this is what he saw when he showed up. Taking on a more urgent tone you told Five,
“You need to move along, your father will be here any second.”
“I see them! I see the car!” Another person shouted from the crowd
Five stood frozen in place. He knew he needed to move but he also wanted you to come with him. But he couldn’t just drag you with him that would get both of you in trouble but he felt less anxious when you were actually by his side. You knew your best friend and sensing his internal conflict you said,
“Je te verrai à l'intérieur”
Finally looking back from the street, Five can feel his brain and body starting to catch up with each other and really process the situation. Looking at you he quickly replies,
“Á très bientôt”
You give him a small nod acknowledging his statement and Five takes that as his cue to walk away. He’s stopped though when Harold grabs at the sleeve of his jacket exclaiming,
“Wait no!”
With the crowd focused on the arrival of his siblings, Five didn’t want to make a scene. He could flash away but he was concerned the kid would hold on and come through the spatial jump with him. Attempting to just pull his arm away Five stated,
“Get off me kid,”
“No I just need to talk to you!” Harold replied
You were already tired of this kid to begin with but seeing him grab and pull on your friend when he should be keeping his hands to himself was the last straw for you. Placing your hand on top of his you firmly demanded,
“Let go of him. Now.”
Harold refused to let go though and so you were left with no choice. Rapidly, you heated up the molecules of your hand and burned the hand that held onto Five’s sleeve. The kid quickly let go as he saw the dark red burn now on the top of his hand. Looking towards Five you commanded,
“Go.”
And with that Five made his way closer to the entrance of his house. Staring out you with wide eyes, Harold looked between you and the mark on his hand.
“How did you do that?” He questioned shocked
“Do what?” You responded blankly
You had to have had powers. You were born on October 1st and you had just hurt him so he would let go of Five. Maybe you didn’t realize you had them but if you had powers that means he probably did too. Trying to get you to understand he explained
“You burned my hand.”
“No clue what you’re talking about.” You replied
This kid was not going to find out what you could do. Continuing to look at him blankly he saw as the rest of the academy member started to walk towards the house.
“Nevermind. Here come the rest of them, academy life here I come.” He said to himself as he jumped the barricade
You let out a sigh as you realized this wouldn’t end well, and yet you kept watching. He let Ben and Klaus pass him by before grabbing on to Allison’s arm the same way he did for Five.
“Excuse me. I'm your biggest fan.” He said
From behind him you could see Luther approach. And if his body language was any indicator you could tell how pissed he was that this kid was grabbing Allison. Grabbing Harold’s arm firmly, Luther pulls him of Allison and he angrily reprimands, “Hey, hey. You're not supposed to be in here.” “Get back behind the barricade!” Sir Reginald yells at him
You watch as Luther wraps an arm around Allison and walks her towards the house while the crowd’s focus shifts to the incident going on before them. With the crowd distracted, as Diego passes you he gestures for you to follow him. You take a cautionary glance at the crowd and with what seems like the confirmation of no one paying attention you phase through the barricade and quickly follow him towards the academy entrance. Although you thought no one noticed though, Harold did.
“What are you doing?” Reginald demanded
Harold look back from what he had just witnessed and up at Sir Reginald. “It's just...I was born on the same day as the Academy kids. I think I'm like them. I must be. I haven't quite figured out what my power is yet. But maybe with your help, we can find out.” He stuttered “You have no power. You never will have power. Now, go home.” Reginald stated “No, please. Just... I...You have to let me stay. I came all this way. Please don't make me go back.” Harold begged “A little word of advice, my boy. Not everyone in this world can be powerful. Chasing something unattainable is a recipe for a lifetime of disappointment and resentment.” Reginald stated
“No, no! I have to have powers because that girl, she has powers! I just saw it!” Harold exclaimed pointing in your direction
Hearing his words you quickly made yourself invisible before anyone could see you standing with the group. Reginald looked towards the house before looking back at Harold asking,
“What girl?”
The crowd started to laugh hysterically at the antics of the kid before them. He was ridiculous thinking he could join the umbrella academy. Trying to defend himself Harold exclaimed,
“She was just here! She-she disappeared!”
“People don’t just disappear, boy.” Reginald remarked “Now get off my property.”
Tears formed in Harold’s eyes. His heroes were now his worst enemies. They ruined his dreams and they ruined his life. From the stairs of the manor you and the rest of the academy kids watched as Harold grabbed his bag and started to run away. You felt bad for the kid but you also hoped you would never see him again.
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tedturneriscrazy · 3 years
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Another Saturday, another episode! Let's take a look at Keeping Up A-fear-ances!
(Good lord I'm starting to make myself sound like some sort of content creator)
Oh, okay, we're just starting at that level of intensity, huh?
Chest gem origins
Gwendolyn not being satisfied with managing the curse and determined to cure it? I'm sure this won't be a real world allegory in the slightest.
Oh, so Eda literally just stumbles upon the portal? I could call that contrived, but honestly it's not dissimilar to how Dipper found Journal 3. For that matter, the entirety of Lord of the Rings is predicated on an accidental discovery like this and nobody gave Tolkien shit about it.
Was the eye on the portal cracked in previous episodes? I don't remember.
Seems like Gwen is the "well-meaning but ultimately misguided" flavor of mom.
As an aside, I am now quite curious about how Eda's first trip to the human realm went. Maybe a future episode will cover it? At any rate, I smell a new favorite fic prompt.
The screaming alarms in the Demon Realm will never not be funny to me.
Also, that is a worrying number of hearts. Eda is straight up murdering these poor creatures.
For some reason the gold fang being removable never occurred to me as a possibility, and now I feel like a kid who's discovered that Santa isn't real.
Oh hey, the new outfit! I'm also impressed how close to symmetrical that tearing was.
I need to get a screencap of Luz sleeping on that stack of books because she is adorable.
Also, staying up all night researching? This season seems determined to completely eradicate the notion of Luz being dumb, and I am here for it.
I have a feeling the Hexside mug will be making its way to The Mystery Shack in the near future.
Lilith's first experience with transformation and she seems understandably horrified.
The curse acting stronger when stressed? That seems...important.
Ah, so the dismemberment is from the curse! A surprisingly useful side effect from what we've seen so far.
Can I just say that I appreciate how Eda's reaction to Lilith's first taste of transformation is immediate remedy, explanation, and reassurance? And doesn't make any snarky comments along the lines of "now you know what it's like?" Whatever happened in that week and a half must have been cathartic as hell.
"Always. Always curious." Luz is the TOH fandom.
(Also, Eda, you know she is, considering how much she went on about your "mysterious past" at the Covention)
"Magic bird tornado?!" Luz has a way with words that's just *chef's kiss*.
"Gwendolyn." Eda is already just fucking done.
"MOM?!?!" Jeez, Lilith, you're just now hearing all this?
I was charmed by how motherly Gwen was acting toward Eda, but then she kinda just...dismissed Lilith, and now I'm somehwat less charmed.
(Sweet flea as a term of endearment is kinda cute, though might have some unfortunate implications depending on how you want to interpret it)
"Who knows what they put in those nasty concoctions?" OH WE GOING FOR THE ANTI-VAXXERS NOW YESSSS
Luz and Lilith's reaction to that whole exchange is priceless.
Everyone's perspective here makes perfect sense for who they are and what they've been through.
Poor Lilith. Her cursing Eda is beginning to make more sense.
Ah, thus begins the collaboration.
"We'll be consulting someone very special." Why does that seem so...ominous?
Is there anyone who watched this episode for the first time whose bullshit detector didn't go off immediately when Gwen mentioned finding someone who promised a cure?
Heh, Palm Stings.
Nonbelievers will be blinded by the power of the tome? I'm sure they will be, Wartlop.
I must say, as something of a scientist myself (okay that's not true, I'm a QA tech for a food manufacturer, but I do have a chemistry degree), I am 100% here for the swings being taken at faith healing/"miracle" cures/anti-vaxxers in this episode
Oh, we Wile E. Coyote now, huh?
Also, interesting how much apple blood is being played up in this episode.
Lilith please you're projecting your mommy issues on a literal child
OH WE REALLY JUST WILE E. COYOTE HUH?
You're right, Luz, Gwen's bicep game is goals.
(Somewhat disappointed the scars are from questing and not beastkeeping, but eh)
Why do I get the feeling there's gonna be a future episode where everybody stages an intervention for Eda's apple blood problem?
"Those feathers mean we're driving the beast out" Gwen no
Hooty is holding the brain cell? Oh no...
If that ice cream came from the Night Market it would explain why Lilith sounds drunk.
(Side note: I can't be the only one getting flashbacks to Mermista's ice cream binge, right? Different context, but still)
"Abomi-berry" "Franken fruit" "Key slime pie" These are A+ flavor names.
Oh, there's the transformation...
I must say that whole segment kinda rubbed me the wrong way. The way King's opinion on his dad was changed seemed...I don't know how to describe it. I get that they needed a trigger for Lilith's transformation, but honestly if any part of the episode is contrived it's this.
"¡It really is that good!" So that's what an accent slip in written form looks like. (The upside down exclamation point is used in Spanish, in case anyone didn't know)
I keep half expecting Eda to say "Beep! Beep!" at this point.
Luz is finally asking questions. Took long enough.
Ah, the classic "moving the goal posts to extract more money from a desparate family member" technique.
Luz channeling Scorpion, we love to see it.
There is an exquisite irony in Eda's mom being scammed, I must say.
Ah, so that's where the elixirs went. Dammit, Gwen.
Luz is definitely thinking "Are you fucking kidding me right now?!"
Beast!Lilith is massive.
"Sweet flea?" Gwen just realized she done goofed.
"I can see you still need a little time." God Luz is so fucking smart.
The con revealed.
OH DAMN SCARY MAMA
(Also I am terrified of bees/wasps, so extra scary mama in my book)
The scam is revealed, goblins, getting back into the Wartlop disguise is kinda pointless.
She joined the Beast Keeping coven entirely to cure the curse? That's dedication. A shame you couldn't have spared some of that for Lilith.
Still, I do like badass scary mama Gwen. I'd be down to see more of that.
Owl Beast fight!
I am slayed by the fact that the portraits are now officially a recurring gag 😂
Aw, here's The Moment™️
"My turn to drive" Does this imply cars are a thing on the Boiling Isles after all?
Lilith crying almost immediately💔 She was holding onto a lot of pain.
Yes, King, she was trying to do her best. I mean, road to hell or whatever, but at least Gwen got there in the end.
WHAT?! YOU'RE BREAKING UP LULU AND HOOTCIFER?!?!?!?
Terrace, that's just cruel. (Worthless brownie points for whoever understands that reference)
No, seriously, you can't just give me my favorite inter-character relationship in the series after Lumity and just...take it away like that, come on! 😭😭😭😭😭😭
I know I should remark on how Lilith told Gwen about the circumstances of the curse, how Gwen rightfully accepted responsibility for the whole situation, and how Luz finds the big hair aspirational, but...NOOOO DON'T END THE ADVENTURES OF LULU AND HOOTCIFER WHYYYYYYYYY💔😭💔😭💔😭
"BUT I CAN'T HOLD A PEN!"
I will never emotionally recover from this.
Okay, I think I got that out of my system. Anyway...
Not the only human, huh? Cue the "Belos is a human" theorists going into maximum overdrive.
That said, a tantalizing lore dump.
We certainly do have a lot of garbage. Some of it even holds office. HEY-O!
Setting up the next episode, too. Continuity!
Camp's over, huh? That means it's been three months.
Way to misdirect with Camila, guys. That said, we have now seen Camila cry and I HATE it. (In the right way, I think)
WHAT THE FUCK
HOLY SHIT
CREEPY LUZ IS REAL WHAT
OWJEIWHQGIWWOPQ
(It's hard to keysmash on a phone, even with autocorrect off)
That wraps it up! The flaws in this episode seem more pronounced than any others in the season so far, but the good stuff was really good! Overall a solid episode! I know everybody's looking forward to library Lumity in the next one (so am I), but I'm personally eager to see what they do with Gus. His part is the A plot, after all.
Anyway, I'll be back at this next week! Still hard to believe this is a thing, but that's life, I guess.
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magireco · 3 years
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out of curiosity what do you think of the characterization of homura in rebellion? i hugely dislike it but get the impression you enjoy it which i think is interesting cuz we seem to have very similar thoughts on homura pre-rebellion (CORRECT ME IF I AM WRONG)
THIS IS INTERESTING BECAUSE IT DEPENDS ON WHAT FLAVOR OF REBELLION HOMURA YOU MEAN. i really really like the way she was done in the first half of the movie but as for the twist at the end...? mmm...
...okay, so... i've been thinking about saying this at some point but i keep avoiding it in fear of causing discourse and such bc... this is a really unpopular opinion apparently, but I really do not think devil homura was done properly. read under the cut if you wanna know why i feel this way!
the first issue i'm going to address is that there wasn't NEARLY enough buildup for it. i'm going to explain this from the perspective of a first-time viewer: what would you have thought would happen after the very last scene of rebellion leading up to them breaking homura out of her soul gem? when homulilly got purified and the flowers on her head turned to sakura flowers (y'know, the flowers that symbolize life and rebirth, homura being reborn from her witch)? did you think homura was suddenly gonna undermine madoka's godliness? because, uh, first-view me did not think that at all. and neither did almost anyone i know who watched it for the first time. not only is that poor setup but it's just so sudden and it feels so out of character compared to what we'd seen in the entire series as a whole, especially considering that the entire last part of the movie leading up until that was about purifying her... and saving her... there wasn't enough buildup. most people are like "but the flower scene happened!" but that's still way too vague...? it's hard to tell what conclusion homura comes to at the end, because we don't get to see any of her internal monologue... there is no other buildup after the flower scene... it just skips to homura realizing she's a witch. wouldn't that bring the viewer to think the flower scene was something that made homura realize she was a witch rather than her suddenly starting to form her plan? it always felt like to me the conclusion homura came to at the end of the flower scene was that she was validating madoka's bravery and telling her that if it ever came to that, she'd have the ability to make that hard decision. which is... so... weird? because i always interpreted that as homura coming to terms with what happened? i could just be interpreting it wrong though, but isn't that supposed to be our proof scene? our buildup scene? why would they make it so hard to understand? we need to know such important buildup points just as blatantly as the natural buildup to homura becoming a witch was. that's just from a moviemaking & writing perspective though.
secondly, i'm gonna discuss homura's motive. i actually ended up understanding were she was coming from after a while of being like "what the hell that makes zero sense!!!!". madoka is a 14-year-old girl who, in order to save the fate of every magical girl, literally had to sacrifice herself and erase herself from the world, and in the end, madoka just ended up saving homura again, and that must've made homura feel like her promise with madoka was never fulfilled. it's unfair what happened when you think about it and the law of cycles should not have been run by madoka herself because she, as any other 14 year old, deserves to be happy on earth. although it was said in magireco that madoka felt happy with what she was doing (and she felt like it truly gave her a purpose), she did admit to feeling lonely and homura probably made that assumption big time. but the way the writers went about it just made her seem so sinister... so out-of-character-ly sinister. what with the evil smirking and the deepened, almost... uh, sensual-seeming voice, and homura completely ignoring madoka's fear. it feels like they twisted her character extremely suddenly and it throws the viewer on a loop. they could've gone with that ending without making such drastic and sudden changes to homura's character, and if they were planning on doing that, why did they not give us more buildup? buildup that wasn't extremely cryptic that you have to scan and search every detail to get a clue? something i love about rebellion is that every time you watch you find something new, but how come some of the only clues illuding to devil homura's existence are in the op? it's odd. why didn't they go with something like making the incubators run the law of cycles? they were the ones at fault for causing it to be created. but honestly, the incubators cannot be trusted with anything, which is why it'd make sense for a magical girl to run the law of cycles, but if homura and madoka had the combined power to do so, what if they just remade the law of cycles so it was less unfair to madoka...? i don't know. either of those possibilites would make more sense than what happened.
something else that kind of irks me about it is that they demonized(literally, lol) homura's love for madoka. homura is very much a canon lesbian, and it's incredibly discomforting to me that they made her seem, outwardly to the viewer, so selfish...? please don't get me wrong, i'm not ACTUALLY calling homura selfish -- i know the entire akumura facade is a mask she put on, but like, it's so much more blatantly sinister than she is in the series when she's putting on the coolmura facade. it's going to really confuse the viewer and see every single one of her actions from the entire series in a completely different light, INCLUDING stuff that happened in rebellion itself. like the genuine sadness homura felt, the way we saw into her soul and felt her pain, that genuinely made a lot of people i've seen think that it was ingenuine upon first inspection... they made homura turn "evil" out of her love for madoka, as if it's a bad thing to fall in love, and as if love for another girl was what corrupted her soul gem... i understand that gen urobuchi probably wanted to explore that kind of path where love leads to obsession or whatever, but homura was selfless to a fault, constantly trying to force herself away from the others in order to not get attached, and deeply afraid of seeming creepy and predatory and scaring(she said this herself), which is exactly what she ends up doing at the end, and i feel so awful that they did that to her... how is the viewer supposed to know what her true motives are at that point? it gets all scrambled up after they did that huge plot twist. i'm going to address another thing super quick before people jump in my ask box over this, i understand also that it would make sense for homura to be obsessed with madoka, but in the series, it was never shown in this light, and like i said, if they were going to do this, why'd they even have the purification scene at the end at all? the buildup is all wrong . it also just made me upset that this ending caused SO many people to start literally believing homura is evil because of her actions at the end, and it made people become even more vehement on their beliefs that homura is obsessive and ps*cho...
i was really confused when i watched it for the first time (and also sobbing hysterically, literally, my funniest rebellion story as someone who has genuinely watched the movie 40-ish times, i remember vividly the first time i watched it i started sobbing on my hands and knees on a yoga mat in my mom's room). also like, just to prove my point a teensy bit more, the ending was so ambiguous and out of nowhere that one of the first google results to "madoka magica rebellion" is "madoka magica rebellion ending explained" because it shocked people so much that that was the first thing they needed to google. also, the fact they left us on such a vague cliffhanger and then abandoned the movie series for a total of 8 whole years only to make a sudden comeback in god's holy year of 2021 was almost cruel. LIKE GUYS I JUST FINISHED UP MY DEVIL HOMURA HEADCANONS IT TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH!!!
...anyways, um, i really have to address the sexualization. madoka magica, previously, was a series that avoided fanservice in the show, at least, but why did they make akumura's design look like that...? it shows an unsettling amount of skin and like, every three seconds in the end they're focusing intensely on her lips and her eyes and... it's almost like the writers forgot she was 14, but they never seemed to forget that in the series? what happened????? in the transformation scene, we get closeup views of homura's thighs and back and stuff and it's all open everywhere... they made her tights into thigh-highs... in the whole series, even when she went to school, she always wore tights, and she was wearing tights in her magical girl outfit too... they absolutely deliberately did that to sexualize her further so they could make official art with her thighs out. speaking of official art that unsettles me, why does so much of the official art make the whole outfit just glued to her body and you can see all the shading on her features... it's just. ugh. anyways.
i went off a LITTLE too much on this and i know this is probably gonna get me some weird glances in the fandom and i am open to hearing other people's opinions but i don't think i'll ever stop disliking the effect this plot twist had on the fandom's interpretation of homura and although i'm like UNDENIABLY incredibly hyper excited for the next movie, i'm kind of...nervous for what this is going to bring? i don't want this next movie to cause the same amount of discourse the ending of rebellion did and i legit just want to see homura happy. another one of my main issues with the ending is just that homura is SO unhappy when she literally deserves to be happy SOOOOOOO BAD and just take a break from all the loops ... i'm Praying to madokami out there that that's what happens.
i know this is all really funny coming from someone who draws devil homura on a regular basis and literally writes her, but like... i'm a lesbian i'm allowed to<3
ANYWAYS thanks for listening this was a fun ask!!!
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petri808 · 3 years
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Inukag AU
“Ready to go, dear?” Mrs. Higurashi asked her daughter as the young woman looked around the room one last time.
Inuyasha watched carefully, noting the hints of nervous energy flowing from Kagome as she nodded, seemingly going along with leaving the hospital. She was finally discharged, and one would think it would be a happy moment, but based on those subtle changes, he suspected otherwise. Inuyasha didn’t want to alarm anyone, so he dutifully followed behind, carrying Kagome’s small suitcase. He could ask her later in private.
The entourage that joined in were, he, Miroku, and Sango trailing Mrs. Higurashi and Kagome in separate vehicles back to the Higurashi residence. They’d left the decision up to Kagome as to where she wanted to go, and she’d picked her childhood home. Inuyasha couldn’t say he was happy about it, but it was understandable under the circumstances. It would be too weird for her to go to their home so soon when he was still really just a stranger in her eyes. So, to make the transition as painless as possible, they’d brought all the things Kagome would need and placed them in her old bedroom. Sango helped to gather and pack all the clothes, toiletries, and any other items she was sure a young woman would want to have. While he and Miroku did the heavy lifting and transporting of the boxes. It was… painful for Inuyasha. To see their shared bedroom barren of half its contents as if they’d broken up for good. The room was cold enough, and the emptiness now exacerbated. Tonight, would surely be the hardest-to-date to go home.
But alas, Inuyasha knew he couldn’t let this pain consume him. He was making great strides in endearing himself to Kagome again, so to risk it all by letting emotions ruin it, would be the stupidest thing in the world. Three and a half months of the loss of Kagome’s presence already felt like a lifetime of heartache he wouldn’t wish upon his worst enemy. Well, except for the one who helped to put him in this mess. But it wasn’t fair to blame it all on his ex. He was a big boy. The burden was just as much if not more on his shoulders. So, Inuyasha chose to use that acknowledgment to motivate him and not let the pain drag him down. This was a second chance at a redemption he was lucky enough to be granted. Though it was extremely awkward at times. Kagome’s personality was fully intact and still very much the sweet, yet feisty brunette that had stolen his heart. Dealing with everything really brought back all those feelings one gets when starting a new relationship. Excitement and dread to not do or say the wrong thing or make a bad impression. He wasn’t in the same depressed and angry mental space as when they’d originally met, but the anxiety was definitely back full force.
Once they were all settled at the Higurashi home, Mrs. Higurashi and Sango went off to the kitchen to prepare a dinner for everyone. Miroku stayed in the living room tending to the twins, which left Inuyasha alone with Kagome. With her consent, they were in her bedroom, he helping her to carry and move boxes, or put away items to make it feel like home again.
“Is it weird,” Kagome questioned as they puttered around the room. “Being in here for you?”
“A little,” Inuyasha answered honestly. “I’m comfortable in here after all these years, but it’s different now.”
The woman nodded her head quietly, clearly in the throes of her own thoughts. “My mom mentioned you stayed for a short time in here… after the accident.”
Inuyasha stopped moving and turned to Kagome. “I did. I hope that wasn’t a problem.”
Again, Kagome shook her head without a verbal response. “It’s just— strange, even for me to be here.” She continued after a long, exhaling pause. “My last memory is of the college dorms, so to move straight back here is weird too.” She sat down on her bed. “I… feel like I’m not supposed to be here.”
He moved closer, sitting on the bed too, but leaving an arms-length between them. “Stop me if it’s too uncomfortable, but… I couldn’t help but notice you seemed sad or nervous back at the hospital. I didn’t wanna say anything with everyone around, but… if you wanna talk, you know I’m here for you, right?”
Kagome slowly nodded. “You’re right, Inuyasha. I was nervous about leaving. Not because I wanted to stay, just nervous about what to expect once I did leave. I’ve been trying so hard to process everything going on and to stay positive, but it’s not always easy.”
Inuyasha could feel a verge of tears building in the woman’s eyes and it sent a pang to his heart. He hated seeing her have to go through all this. Hated himself for having caused all of this. It brought a wave of his own tears to the forefront. “I’m so, so sorry Kagome,” his head and ears drooping. “But I promise to help you through this. Even if at the end we part ways, I just wanna make sure you get through this.”
“I know,” she smiled weakly. “I believe you, and you don’t have to keep apologizing Inuyasha. You didn’t intend for any of this to happen.”
He made a bold move and reached out, placing his hand over hers. “Could you tell me, what is scaring you the most right now?”
Kagome paused. “Mmm, it’s the not recognizing things. I’m sure there’s been changes during the time I can’t remember. What if I don’t recognize places around town and get lost? What new technologies have popped up? There’s just all these unknowns— and it kind of scares me a little. It feels… like I’m all alone even though I’m not alone. Does that make sense?”
“I think… I understand. Everyone around you knows what’s going on but you don’t, so it makes you feel alone?”
Kagome snapped to attention with excitement. “Yes! That’s exactly it!”
With no chance to process the elation, Inuyasha found himself being hugged by the woman so tightly, he could do nothing but melt from the contact. His arms wrapped around her to return the gesture, pushing all the calming energy could into Kagome that he could. It felt… breathtaking to be in her arms again and he couldn’t stop himself from burying his face into her hair, smelling the strawberry scented shampoo he’d grown to love on her.
When Kagome finally pulled away, a few happy tears trickled down Inuyasha’s face. Concerned, she reached out to his cheek and wiped them away. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“No, no,” his hand covered the one resting on his cheek as he smiled weakly, struggling to hold back the dam. “I’m sorry for crying, it just… I just,” a few more tears rolled down. “I missed you so much Kagome. I-I know this is much harder on you, but Kami I just miss you so, so much.” That was it, Inuyasha couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. “It hurts to not come home to you. I swear I’m gonna insane sometimes wishing I could go back in time, so the fight and accident never happened. When you hugged me, it just felt so comforting, that…” his words choked, and all he could do to stop from rambling was let out a long sigh.
Kagome smiled and smoothed her thumb against his skin, “it’s okay to let it out, Inuyasha. I get it. This is hard on both of us. I’ll admit it’s a little surprising to me too how natural it feels to be here with you.”
“You’ve always been the better person,” Inuyasha mumbled out. “The one who could always make things better. Me, I’m just winging it.”
“I think you’re doing just fine,” she smiled. “One step at a time, right?” Kagome cupped both his cheeks. “Like you said, we’ll get through this. I have faith we will.”
Inuyasha nodded quietly, sniffling the last remnants away. “I really don’t deserve you Kagome.”
“Hush. I saw something special in you once, and based on what I’m seeing now, I was right. Do you really think I’d have given you the time of day if I didn’t think you deserved my attention?”
“No…”
“Exactly.”
That made Inuyasha snort a laugh. “Kami. This is why I fell so hard for you. You were never too afraid to call me out on my bullshit!”
Now it was Kagome’s turn to blush. “Thanks… I guess?”
Inuyasha smiled and chuckled. “I’m glad we could talk to each other like this again.”
“Me too,” Kagome smiled.
After that night, every night, Inuyasha called Kagome after dinner to see how her day went and to tell her, “sweet dreams.” During the first few calls, there were more silent moments than talking moments despite their breakthroughs, but it was improving. They’d play games like 20 questions to spark a conversation, which often did the trick, or if in a particularly good mood, a mild form of truth or dare. It was a great way for Kagome to ask anything she wanted to of Inuyasha and no matter how tough the subject matter was, he’d answer them truthfully. She was having to learn about him all over again, so he did his best not to get upset if Kagome didn’t know something as mundane as his favorite brand of chips, or what his favorite color was. Sometimes he was tempted to test her memory to see if telling a falsehood would gain a pause, but in the end thought against it. He couldn’t risk upsetting her, even if it was meant as a tease.
As he sat on the Higurashi’s couch next to Kagome fidgeting with his fingers, the nervous energy was obvious from both sides. Inuyasha pressed forward despite the butterflies in his stomach threatening to unfurl his breakfast.
“No really, you tell me what you’d like to do?” Even though Inuyasha knew a lot about Kagome, he didn’t want to behave as if he did.
“But you’re the one asking me out on a date. Shouldn’t you have something planned in advance?” Kagome retorted in exasperation of the ridiculous back and forth going nowhere.
“I figured it would be nicer if you chose.”
“Oh.” Kagome paused. “I guess I assumed since you know me already, you’d just pick a place I like.”
“I mean, I could, but I didn’t think that would be very fair.”
“Inuyasha, it’s okay. I promise. I accepted the fact you know a lot about me, so something as simple as dinner or a date, it’s okay to choose.”
“Sorry, I just didn’t wanna do anything that makes you uncomfortable.”
Kagome smiled and took his hand. “And I appreciate it, really I do. But could we just pick somewhere already? I’m starving!”
Inuyasha chuckled, his frayed nerves dwindling away. “Yes, m’lady. There’s a new sushi place that I think you’ll like…”
On his days off, they went out together on dates, sometimes him choosing the location, sometimes her. Since she couldn’t remember the last 5 or so years, there were several changes around town that were new to Kagome. Initially, she’d worried before leaving the hospital about how she’d feel about all the changes, but those concerns had melted away, and her excitement often became infectious for Inuyasha. She’d drag him around to see the sights, almost wanting him to show her all the changes. He rarely went out, so there was a lot for him to learn too. Baby steps were the name of the game. Simple dates, no touching yet, not even hand holding, letting Kagome guide the pace. Inuyasha also found their times together becoming more exciting to him. Over time, all relationships tend to find a groove where one feels comfortable, settled. Not that there’s no excitement anymore, but it’s just not the same as the rush of a brand new relationship with all the what if’s, the embarrassing moments, and heart racing unknowns.
No matter how many dates they’d gone on so far, each time Inuyasha pulled up to the Higurashi home, the same flutter of energy pulsed inside of him as if his inner demon just couldn’t wait to see its chosen mate again. Inuyasha was still nervous about the future, but so far things were going great between he and Kagome. Who would have thought such a horrible circumstance could lead to this kind of exhilaration? Because he swore… he was falling in love all over again.
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hwrryscherry · 3 years
Text
The one when Y/N meets Harry.
 November 28th, 2017 - Shanghai, China
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Today is the day. Today is the day you’ll be walking for Victoria’s Secret for the first time. Dreams do come true. You traveled all the way up from New York to Shanghai with some of your best friends after getting ready for this day for the past months. It wasn’t easy if you must admit. Having to follow a strict diet and working out almost every day was hard but being here today it’s totally worth it.
   ‘’Alright, it’s almost show time. I need everybody to be ready by minutes!’’ — The stage manager yelled while walking through all those tall ladies that were probably much taller than him. As usual, there’s going to be four segments and I’ll be in just two of them. At this moment, it’ll be the Goddess segment which looks completely stunning. You look around to see all those gorgeous women around me with their perfectly styled hair, beautiful golden wings and lingerie getting their final touch ups just like you are. You have no idea if it’s the amount of people around you now that are touching your hair, putting makeup in your face, fixing up the tiara or even if it’s the idea of having all eyes on you in just a few minutes. Of course, you wanted it to be perfect, it’s your first VS show and you can’t stand the thought of falling or anything like this.
You tried to calm down and focus on your breathing while staring to those extremely big screens hanged on the wall that showed the stage from every possible angle and you could totally notice that there was a lot of people out there.
‘‘I remember my first time too! I felt like my heart was about to leave my body’‘. Bella, that was right beside me getting herself ready as well.
 ‘‘Well, yeah! I’m one step to passing out now’‘. You joked while feeling this small woman finishing the touch ups of your outfit. It was stunning. There was a lingerie, of course, which looked like a white color but it was actually more into ai really light tone of grey. And they complemented it with a super long baby blue fabric over the lingerie. You had a super goddess like a golden tiara upon your head and some diamonds made up jewelry on your neck and years that probably costed more money than you could afford.
‘‘Romee! Where is Romee?We need Romee!’‘. The stage manager called Romee as she would be opening the runaway and you could see from the corner of your eye that she was almost running to get from the starting place. She literally looked like a Greek goddess with those beautiful long blonde locks and blue eyes. ‘‘Ok girls, I need all of you to get by your entering positions, alright?’‘ , by this phrase, all of you start to go to your marked positions. Yours was right before Bella which made you a little bit more confident because at least you had to do it with your best friend by your side. 
You stared again at the big screens in the wall that showed the stage, seeing that it was a little bit dark, there was a big structure rising up from the floor and apparently there was a band inside of it. Everything looked really well produced, and you really tried to recognize in some way the melody of the instrumental song that was playing to know who was the band but your mind was totally blank now. All you could focus on was that you were just about to realize one of your biggest dreams. You looked at the line of tall girls in front of you as you listened to a scream. You knew this song by the melody. You couldn’t believe your ears and eyes. It was Only Angel by Harry Styles, it literally was Harry Styles. For some reason the fact of knowing this song so well made you a lot more confident. He started singing and the stage manager told Romee to go when Harry sang ‘’Broke a finger, knocking on your bedroom door’’ and Romee started doing her fabulous catwalk. And then Laís Ribeiro entered with the fantasy bra, which it’s the million dollar bra from VS, again, probably more expensive that you could afford. By the time that Romee came back from the backstage you were just leaving.
Being there totally put your adrenaline levels the highest it has ever been. The light, the other models, the crowd, the song. Everything was perfect. You were smiling thinking to yourself ‘’please don’t cry, please don’t fall’’, but you manage to do it, one foot in front of the other and posture, you looked glamorous, mostly like what Aphrodite would look like in real life.
‘’I must admit I thought I'd like to make you mine As I went about my business through the warning signs End up meeting in the hallway every single time And there's nothing we can do about it’’
That was the part Harry had just song when you entered. Harry, of course, didn’t know you as you never talked before, except for that one DM. But he was stunned by the moment he saw you walking. He thought to himself how spectacular you looked as you walked towards him with that beautiful smile of yours.
‘’Told it to her brother and she told it to me That she's gonna be angel, just you wait and see’‘
Harry kept singing as you walked beside him. You looked at him and winked at the British boy as you held the baby blue fabric over you up to create a wing effect and Harry was just so caught up with the song and the moment that he kneeled down. Harry Styles literally got on his knees to you while signing those exact words:  
‘’When it turns out she's a devil in between the sheets And there's nothing she can do about it Hey, hey’’ 
You were surprised. Shocked actually. But the show couldn’t stop because you were flattered and honored about the fact that HARRY STYLES GOT ON HIS KNEES for you. So you kept walking and blew a kiss in the air to the camera started to walk back to the backstage when you saw your mom in the crowd looking extremely proud of her baby, you waved at her right before entering the backstage again.  
The models were all celebrating and hugging the others. In the moment you step into the backstage Bella came hugging you and you hugged her back. You feel so happy and pround of yourself for that. The camera focused on you guys as you looked to the camera and said ‘’It was amazing!’’. And it really was. Your heart was beating as fast as never and even the same small lady that was fixing your outfit earlier came to you and Bella saying ‘’Come on girls, you have to change outfits!”. You and Bella walked hand in hand to the appareal and only parted ways when had to change lingeries. This time Bella and you wouldn’t walk at the fellow segment and apparently has Harry’s again.
The lingerie looked different though, this one was a black lingerie with actual wings. Some beautiful and medium sized blue wings and blue long gloves. And again you were ready to enter the stage. Looking up to the screens as I was going to watch this time, the big structure was rising from the floor again and Candice Swanepoel entered looking fabulous, I mean, it’s Candace right. 
In general, the show was so good. He sang Kiwi, which is one of your favorites. You couldn’t stop singing at the backstage the entire time. And when the entire show was done and everybody was backstage eating pizza so you’re a hundred percent happy now, Harry was a little farther away from you wondering if he should go talk or not with you, even though he have this feeling that he knows you from somewhere and he just can’t remember where. So he decided he would come with the excuse that he thinks he have met you before. Harry walked towards you wearing a black suit with a pink shirt while holding a red cup with coke on. You were so focused on eating your pizza and didn’t even noticed the boy behind you, so he touched your right shoulder with his hand calmly while talking lowly ‘’Excuse me’’ as you turned out to look at him. You were still in your outfit except for those big blue wings that you had already taken off and at that moment Harry thought to himself about even though he had met tons of pretty women in his life but you were the prettiest. Everything about you was beautiful, your eyes, your nose, your lips and that smile you had held up in your face since the runaway. You were focused on his face too. You stared into his big green eyes and how they were sparkling in this moment.
— Hi! I... — He said, brushing his thought of his mind and held out his right hand for you — I’m Harry!
— I know!  — You told him shaking your hands with his as a meeting form, soon using the same his to grab one more piece of pizza  —  I’m Y/N! You were so great out there, really I’m impressed!
  — Oh  —  Harry said while exhaling a small laugh while analyzing your face to try to know with you were flirting, or just being nice. You were just being nice. Of course Harry is extremely handsome, but you really just think he’s being friendly at this moment.  —  So I made a good first impression then! That’s good.
— Excuse me? Of course you did! I love your songs, I’m like a super fan.  —  You told him being honest, you have been normally shy meeting new people, but something in how he acted and talked really made you feel comfortable straight away.
—  I’m flattered! — Harry said, putting his free hand over his clothed while closing his eyes and giving you a cheeky smile — So..Is this your first time in Shanghai?
—   Yes! I haven’t been to many places actually, just basic Fashion Week places by now, which I love of course! Is it your first time too?
— Actually yes! I’m on tour but me and my band mates are gonna take a walk through the city this night, you know, to have a experience  —  Harry explained to you and turned around a little to show you his band mates by the corner of the room where Mitch, Adam, Sarah, Naomi and Charlotte who were staring at you both indiscreetly waved as noticed that Harry were pointing at them. As the nice girl you were, you smiled and waved at them back before returning your attention to Harry  — Maybe you would like to come with us...If you want of course, don’t feel obligated to, please!
You laughed about his concern of making you feel obligated or uncomfortable about something and looked around searching for Bella through the room, you saw her talking with the other models and stared back at Harry.
—  I’m with my friend Bella and we kinda wanted to do the same thing so.. If it’s okay if she comes too, I really want to, don’t worry!   —  You were truthful, you and Bella really were planning to explore Shanghai through the night, but of course you wouldn’t go out in a city you don’t know with a group of people you don’t know. You truly don’t think they would be capable of causing you any kind of harm, but it’s always great to be cautious.
— It’s perfect! Let’s go then, do you want to go now or?... —  Harry asked tenderly while rubbing his multiple rings on his hand.
— I mean...I gotta put some clothes on, but we’ll do it now and we’ll find you guys here?  —  You said, putting a lock of your hair behind your ear before leaving your empty cup by the table beside both of you.
— Sure!
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