#im sad but also happy but also sad | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wasyago · 11 months

Text

the brainrot won

#GUY S i know i haven't posted anything in a while and thats because im working on a big cool project that i really want to finish without-#distractions. but uh. as you can see. ive been distracted 😔. still working on it tho!!!! and im very happy with it turns out its just-#super time and energy consuming so ive tried to limit my intake of other media to not make myself want to draw other stuff #i also haven't read the last two (two already?????) chapters of RnS and im very sad about it and i want to read it but you know that if i-#read it ill want to make fanart and then ill never finish my project :(#SO. sorrey for the lack of art itll be coming when im free to draw!!!!!!!#but also. yes ive watched new life because i dont want to go insane with nothing but this project on my mind and umm. had to take a little-#break to do a couple designs for fun... and to switch it up a bit because for real im going insane i think #ALSO. friend got me into zelda botw and i haven't played a whole lot yet (because project) but ive tried to take some inspiration for-#designs from there. at least for joel and scott. everyone else not so much...#WELL ANYWAYS this is getting long. i should really stop rambling in the tags and just make separate posts for all this but i dont want to #umm. tags.#new life smp #smallishbeans #mythical sausage #geminitay #pearlescentmoon #smajor1995 #inthelittlewood #my art #sketch

4K notes · View notes

tubbytarchia · 3 months

Text

I don't know what this is all I know is that LimL Joel makes me really emotional

#I know he has a tendency to go deranged on his red lives but idk something about him beginning to lose it after Jimmy died and killing Grian #joel smallishbeans #smallishbeans fanart #trafficblr #Again its his red life shenanigans but... If only Jimmy had known how affected someone was by his death. I'm choosing to believe this #and him then going out like a sad pathetic wet cat even with Grian's sacrifice... He really deserves a win one of these days lmao please #Also I cant stop thinking about how Jimmy wouldn't have left him. Grian was sensible to and most players probs would have #Joel really does become a lost cause so its fair and Grian did still care (and went to say goodbye as well as sacrifice his time for him)#But Jimmy would have stuck by even if Joel were in this state (and they'd both get themselves killed pathetically but)#And Joel having shown such genuine care for Jimmy and concern over his limited time... man anything w Jimmy makes me so emotional lol #I love them so #oh Ig about the art itself. I dont like it but hey thats how it tends to go when you try smth new. And no shame in trying #but if one person likes this then yayy I will still feel accomplished and happy #Im looking at this again and hey its not that bad actually yay I love to approve of my own art. self love hell yea #tubby art

1K notes · View notes

napping-sapphic · 7 months

Text

I just want to fall in love with someone who makes me feel safe like even when we’re angry or sad or upset i just want to know that both of us are still going to be okay

#wlw #wlw mood #sapphic #sapphism #lesbian #today was….not good #and at one point i had a moment #where i was just unbearably SAD and LONELY because i didn’t have anyone to call or talk to about it #but im still really hopeful it will happen some day #because all i want in this world is to feel secure #and for others to feel secure around me #and for everyone to feel secure around people they love #because it’s so painful and scary when you don’t #but one day im going to be warm and happy in someone’s arms and will barely remember this at all #im manifesting it #im completely okay btw things just got a little rough #and in the incredibly stressful and dramatic times i was experiencing my brain STILL had to be gay #im gay and i like sleeping #also yeah i said i wouldnt post after midnight again like two days ago but whatever #im sad and want to yearn on the internet we can make an exception tonight

2K notes · View notes

cactus-juiceee · 8 months

Text

epilogue

#SHES FINALLY OUT OF THE WIP FILES #thank god #hueegh epilogue yhk make me sick.. what do you mean their only happy ending was together and they sacrificed everything for that huh #just realizing I forgot to give han sooyoung glasses which is honestly a crime but #ough oh well #also im so sad I couldn’t do yhk week bc I was busy so think of this as my late contribution #anyway im finally free of rendering hell (has already started 10 billion other pieces that require rendering)#orv #omniscient reader's viewpoint #orv spoilers #yoohankim #kim dokja #han sooyoung #yoo joonghyuk #yhk #cactusjuiceart

2K notes · View notes

kana7o · 10 months

Text

[I used to know my place was the spot next to you]

#obikin #sw #yeah ive been listening to speak now (Taylors version) all day can you tell #this ones my favourite from the album its so *chefs kiss #anyways i like thinking of force ghost obiwan hanging out with vader and watching him with sad eyes #but maybe also a little happy? bc he can finally be close to anakin agan after all this time?#or i shouldnt say happy but im not sure what that feeling is #anyway im glad i finally drew this bc its been pingponging in my head for probably a month now

2K notes · View notes

flintbian · 9 months

Text

There's a disabled angel in good omens 🥺

#listen im only in episode two and i know there's some drama going down but im focusing on this lol #i love that not only do they show the angel using a wheelchair and being ambulatory #but they also visibly show them miracling innaccessibility issues so that they Can still use the chair #instead of just getting rid of the disability #part of my is conflicted bc im like... there's disabilities in heaven? and that makes Me sad bc my disability is hell and painful as fuck #But getting rid of disability in fantasy is eugenist crap and showing that god made a disabled angel is a net good thing #while it personally makes me sad to think if there was a heaven i could still be in pain all the time #not all disabilites are bad and need to be cured we're a wide spectrum and we've been fighting for disabled rep esp in fantasy for ages #it's objectively good my personal feelings about my own disability aside #part of me thinks it's cliche to say 'you were made perfect' bc they're an angel But it's not we literally havent had this type of rep lol #anyways it made me happy to see #and im so glad it's a power chair user that's ambulatory it's important for abled ppl to see that #anyways y'all keep your drama and spoilers off my post im not far in and im only talking about this shoo #oh also!! love the fantasy hover chair they use in heaven specifically too i wish we had that it kicks ass #p

2K notes · View notes

beebeedibapbeediboop · 1 year

Text

Haven't I given enough?

Given enough

#artists on tumblr #art #illustration #the postwoman #the bad bad shadow guy #character design #angst #everyone: oh bee is back she might post more of the postwoman and bad bad shadow guy :D #me: drop this #best I can do chief #i told my friend i wanted to draw her sad because i always draw her happy and she said when was the last time you drew her happy #and im like....thats fair #might be for another day lmao #tbh it's also a big vent art #song in caption is gilded lily by cults #using my ocs to cope

5K notes · View notes

cozylittleartblog · 16 days

Text

here comes the boy ~ hello boy ✨

cleaned up a couple of the vash doodles i did while learning to draw him :)

#trigun #trigun 98 #vash the stampede #anime #doodles #art #dat me #my friend phoenix was visiting from portland almost the whole last week it was really fun !!! i did not open PS for a week FJHBGDBHJDFG #how do i draw again... what is a tablet.... i forgor .....#i have seen TWO trigun fans in public this weekend. a guy at the bookstore with a vash pin on his lanyard + someone at the local arcade #who had a PUNISHER ITA BAG ??? COOL AF??? the arcade was also full of furries for some reason. which was cool but i've never seen it before #girl the arcade is hot enough as it is if you're wearing a fursuit in an arcade you are braver than any us marine #I WAS SO SAD I LEFT MY PURSE (ALSO AN ITA BAG) IN THE CAR FOR THE ARCADE BECAUSE I HAVE A VASH PIN IN IT .....#please ask me about my ita bags... please ask me about my pins.... i am insane about my pins......#my brother and i are going to indie pop con in 2 weeks if i dont find some cute trigun 98 stuff i will riot #i am relentlessly vashposting on main. i will draw other characters i swear but he is my favorite #any character where i go 'there is something so so so wrong with him' is my favorite EVERY TIME #im just happy to be drawing again honestly #i got about a month before anime central so i am just trying . to VIBE. for the first time in months

308 notes · View notes

ansleof · 8 months

Text

Someone needs to stop me from making so many animal AUs LMAO

Anyways here's the life gang as deer because!!! deer are cool!!! I'm pretty proud of the species choices if I do say so myself :]

741 notes · View notes

jadenvargen · 6 months

Text

thanks so much everyone who was interested in a painting! most of them have been sold off and i'm in the process of making shipping labels rn. some are still left if interested. i'm rly happy everyone has been so supportive q.q most everything's been sold out, and i'm really happy to see it go to a better home.

the pieces that are left if anyone is still interested are as follows:

also, i thought to add some extra pieces that i initially didn't want to sell because i wasn't personally as pleased with them, but if anyone's interested:

G: 150 $ L: 30$ H: 80$ O: 100$

X: 30$ Y: 40$ Z: 20$ W: 30$

Plus this piece that I wanted to post but didn't end up happening. maybe someday. it's A-3 sized ds9 episode painting:

300$ because it's twice as large as most of the others.

as always, [email protected] for all inquiries !

bonus. if anybody's interested, i'm considering putting my 2021 sketchbook (full of saw art mostly lol) on ebay for auction, but idk if it's a good idea. LMK what u guys think! (here's a quick flip-through video of it. CW for blood and some nudity)

Thank you everyone for the support so far. Absolutely no pressure in buying, just if you want, it's here. lots of love.

#i had the sketchbook during a very important but also very very very sad time in my life. and im honestly happy to send it off.

506 notes · View notes

stromblessed · 5 months

Text

Mizu's spectacles, and the levels of her disguise

In drafting some more Blue Eye Samurai meta posts, I find myself writing out the comparisons between what Mizu can and cannot hide about herself, and how that affects how she moves through the world.

Like, I get the jokes about Mizu's glasses, if only color contacts had existed back then, etc. etc., and I think (hope) that most viewers don't take the glasses jokes seriously, as in "I don't care about the suspension of disbelief because BES is a cartoon." But I wanted to write these thoughts out anyway without burying them in a text post about something else.

I think the points I'm going to lay out here are viewed very differently by different people, so please feel free to add to this post, reply, or put your thoughts in the tags!

Not only do Mizu's glasses not actually help her that much, there's surely more to Mizu's mixed race appearance than just the color of her eyes.

In my view, this was pointed out in episode 1:

I'm willing to bet most of us were expecting young Taigen to say "blue eyes," not "ROUND eyes."

Obviously this is still about Mizu's eyes, but not even spectacles can hide their shape.

I don't think the show is obligated to point out everything about Mizu's face that isn't quite as Japanese as the people around her expect. Though the creators have said that they specifically designed Mizu - and her clothes - to read both as "white" and as "Japanese," as well as both male and female. I think there's more about Mizu's features that read as "white" than just her eyes.

This is where my own headcanons start entering the picture, but it's my impression that people can just tell that Mizu looks different, whether or not they can put a finger on exactly how.

There's the little girl who looks at Mizu and then hides on the way into Kyoto:

When there's more to your face you'd like to cover up than just your eyes, big hats are a big help!

By the way, most of these examples have to come from the first half of the season, since by the second half, either Mizu is too preoccupied with fighting henchmen, or everyone Mizu is facing knows who she is already, and she therefore has no reason to hide her mixed race identity.

It's worth mentioning that the mere fact that Mizu has to hide multiple aspects of her identity - her mixed race and her sex - results in her having to choose clothes that really, really cover her up, which doesn't win her any favors either:

(Zatoichi reference, anyone?)

If it were as easy as, for example, tying her glasses to her head and wa-lah, nobody would ever know she was half-white - then (1) Mizu would've just done that long ago, and (2) Mizu wouldn't be so on guard and on tenterhooks 100% of the time the way she's depicted in the show, even when her glasses are on.

Her spectacles sure don't help her in the brothel, which is full of observant women who are trying to seduce her, meaning they get good long looks at her:

Mizu never takes her glasses off, but they still send a woman to her who has light eyes, thinking that must be what will interest a blue-eyed man:

No wonder Mizu gets mad after this, lol

So Mizu never takes her spectacles off in the brothel, it's dimly lit inside, and the women can still tell that she has blue eyes. I'm getting the sense that Mizu putting on her spectacles isn't a guarantee that people suddenly can't tell that she looks different.

And yet no one spots that she's female.

Mizu can hide her breasts, can wear her hair in the right style, can hide what's between her legs, can walk and talk and behave like a man - and she's been doing it for almost her entire life, to the point that not only is she very good at it, but the threat of being found out as female is deadly, but isn't presented in the show as omnipresent.

Let me explain.

She threatens Ringo for nearly saying the word "girl" out loud, because while she's constantly ostracized for being mixed race, being a woman traveling without a chaperone, carrying a sword, and disguised as a man will get her killed or flogged or arrested or some combination of these things.

But in addition, it's been drilled into her since she was a child that if she is discovered as female, the combination of her being mixed race and female will identify her as someone extremely specific, someone known to some bad people, and she will be killed:

I think of it as Mizu thinking to herself, "Being found out as mixed race means I'm treated badly. Being found out as mixed race and a woman means I'm dead."

Mizu's hair is cut as a child. But she isn't made to wear a big hat, or cover her eyes somehow, or anything like that. Because hiding her sex is a more successful endeavor than hiding her race.

Ringo finds out she's female by accident, but once Mizu accepts the fact that he won't rat her out, she relaxes pretty early on in the season. Because the threat of being found out as female is mitigated pretty much 99.9%, since Mizu has gotten so good at being a man. And also, because most of the time, people see what they want to see. Even if Mizu's face makes her stand out as "not 100% Japanese," no one in the world of BES looks at Mizu's clothes, her bearing, her sword, hears her voice, and will ever in a million years conclude that she is a woman, because expectations around gender roles in the Edo period were so rigid and so widely enforced.

One detail that proved this to me is after the Four Fangs fight:

Ringo takes off Mizu's clothes so he can stitch her up, then leaves her clothes off even after he's done. He doesn't even throw her cloak over her as a blanket or anything. There's a little a straw (pallet?) as a divider there on the left, but anyone could just peek around it and see Mizu and her chest bindings. (I think it's mostly there as a windbreaker.)

And Taigen is right there, but he doesn't give a shit:

Opinions probably vary hugely on this, but my impression is that because the show doesn't make any kind of deal about Taigen being in the room with Mizu here, my guess is that Mizu isn't in any danger of Taigen thinking she's female. Even when I watched the show for the first time, I assumed that Taigen had seen Mizu out of her clothes here, and that he thought nothing of it.

Eat your heart out, Li Shang (Mulan 1998). I actually do think that this scene is a direct and purposeful side-eye to that movie, lol

There's obviously some nuance to how "severe" being mixed race is compared to how "severe" being a woman is for Mizu:

After all, Swordfather can't bear to listen to Mizu confess to being a woman.

So a Japanese man can go wherever he wants, whenever he wants in BES. A Japanese woman has limited options: marriage, religion, or a brothel. A mixed-race man is an eyesore in this story. A mixed-race woman is a death sentence.

May as well eliminate the female aspect, and do what you can about the mixed-race aspect. Because that's just realistic.

Meaning Mizu can avoid the strictures Edo society places on women. But she can't avoid the repercussions that come with being mixed race. And I truly don't think that it's just because "there's no brown contacts yet."

#blue eye samurai #mizu #racism #bes #I am truly disappointed that we didnt get absolute confirmation that Taigen saw Mizus bound chest and just didnt think it was a big deal #but I still think that scene is making a point #again I dont think most people take the glasses jokes seriously #but its been bothering me ever since I first saw them #I really dont think Mizu just looks like a 100 percent Japanese person...... with blue eyes #and I bet that will be made even more obvious when she goes to London where Im sure she will meet plenty of people #who are more than happy to point out their observations to her #also I ran out of room in this post to go into it but this is also what made Mizus marriage an absolutely doomed prospect #Mikio talks about wanting to find the right creature for his lord and well... a mixed race woman is the right creature huh #he just needed a little push imo #getting kind of sad at the thought that Ringo is the only person in Mizus life who knows her whole identity AND accepts it wholly

433 notes · View notes

alicerovai · 6 months

Text

⚠️⚠️⚠️ LOKI SPOILERS ⚠️⚠️⚠️

TO THE ANON WHO KEPT SENDING ME SPOILERS WHERE “LOKI AND SYLVIE WERE GOING TO KISS IN EPISODE 6 AND GOING SOMEWHERE TOGETHER LEAVING MOBIUS ALONE” WELL YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF BECAUSE MOBIUS HAS BEEN LEFT ALONE BUT YOUR SHIP WAS NONEXISTENT IN THIS SEASON AND LOKIUS ARE JUST IN THEIR AZIRACROW ERA. MOBIUS IS WAITING FOR LOKI AND LOKI IS WATCHING OVER HIM AND HE CAN EVEN HEAR HIM. SYLVIE PARTED AND THATS IT. THE ENDING WAS LOKIUS YOU BTCHES

#IM MOURNING IM SAD BUT ALSO HAPPY #LET TIME PASS #MOBIUS IS WAITING FOR HIM AND LOKI FREAKING KNOWS IT #lokius #loki #tom hiddleston #mobius m mobius #loki series

612 notes · View notes

rakkuntoast · 11 months

Text