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#im not a huge fan of the first part of this story but i really like the ending. whatever its fine
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Hard to Shake (M, cold)
Woof, that was too long of a hiatus. I'm back with some Greyson sickfic! In this, Greyson has a one night stand and ends up 'running into' his hookup in a not-so-stellar way. This was a fun write, I'm feeling a little rusty after taking a couple months off writing but I hope you all like it. Please let me know what ya think, good, bad or indifferent! :)
CW: M snz, colds, contagion, coughing, some M/M romance but nothing above PG-13 lol. 5k words (it's a slow burn, shocker, I know)
Hard to Shake
The club was dark, humid, and loud as fuck - just the way he liked it.
“I’ll get us drinks,” Matt said, disappearing into the crowd to push towards the bar without waiting on Greyson’s response. Not that he would have stopped his counterpart; Matt had a boyfriend waiting for him at the end of this black hole of a night. Greyson, alternatively, was on the prowl for a bed, and someone to share it with.
They had begun the night at two pm, just an hour after brunch ended, since the only way to get a proper buzz on a Sunday was to start early as hell. Elijah had closed the restaurant early – “We’ve had ten guests all day. It’s too damn hot for brunch, and I want to go home” – and Mark was currently on a plane home from England after a week spent with family; it was like the universe was begging them to go out.
The restaurant’s reservations had been capped at a tiny number the next two days to prepare for their food writer dinner on Wednesday, and Greyson was so nervous about this career-shaping dinner that he could barely keep himself from lapsing into panic attacks at the slightest provocation; it was Matt who insisted on the bender.
“We haven’t gone on a good one since Mark and I got together,” the sous chef had said after service. “And you need a drink, you're acting like a psycho.”
Greyson, never one to deny himself a good binge drink, had taken the bait and allowed himself to be paraded through the city for the rest of the day. Now, at eleven pm and with Mark back at his and Matt's place safe and sound, Greyson could feel the night coming to a close. Time to round it out with a good old-fashioned one-night-stand.
Without waiting for Matt to return with the drinks, Greyson sashayed onto the dance floor and began grinding on whoever seemed the most into it – he ground on a group of drunk men, twirled between two gorgeous women who laughed giddily through the song, and put his tongue into so many people’s mouths that he lost count. Of course it was fun; it always was. But the hunt for a bed partner had proven, thus far, unsuccessful.
“There you are,” Matt slurred, coming up behind his boss and shoving a whiskey into his hand. “Why do you always run off? I’m about three seconds away from getting you one of those toddler-leash backpacks.”
“Makin’ friends, Matty boy,” Greyson said, chugging his drink and slamming the glass onto the closest table he could find. “Some of us don’t have the luxury of goin’ home to a warm, naked man in our bed.” Greyson elbowed Matt playfully and the younger man rolled his eyes.
“Fair ‘nough,” he said, sipping his drink. “Hey, actually, I saw someone who was exactly your type back near the bar. Talkin’ about food and everything.” Greyson raised his eyebrows, intrigued, and Matt looped his arm into his boss’s and led him back towards the horseshoe-shaped bar. “Let’s see if we can’t get you fucked to sleep.”
Matt pushed the two of them through the crowd, his head on a swivel, until finally he spotted the man he’d been talking about. “There he is,” Matt said, pushing Greyson towards the bar. “Do your thing.”
The sous hadn’t lied; this man was quintessential Greyson’s type. Shorter than his six-foot-three-inches by about half a foot, perfect skin, hair coiffed in a way that just smelled of total pretentious douchebag, and a full blazer and dress pants at the club. Oh yeah, Greyson thought, pulling the elastic out of his sandy curls and shaking them to fall around his shoulders, there’s the rest of my evening.
“Hi,” Greyson said, pushing himself in front of whoever the guy had been talking to before. “Can I buy you a drink?”
***
In his defense, he hadn't known the condition of the man he'd left with until they got to his apartment. The club had been dark; he could barely hear the sound of his own voice, let alone the wheeze of someone else’s. And he’d been really, really drunk.
“Hh-! EISHH-oo! ISHH-oo!” The man – Reed, Greyson had learned his name was – curled into his elbow to sneeze as he pushed open the door to his apartment. “Shit, pardon mbe,” he muttered, clearing his throat and beckoning Greyson in. The chef, blasted as he was, simply ignored Reed’s constant sneezing.
“Now, where were we?” Greyson purred, pawing the back of Reed’s head and pulling it into his own. The two stood in the entry of Reed’s apartment – a truly incredible fifteenth-story one-bedroom in the Upper East Side with its own doorman – making out until Reed had to pull away to catch his breath.
“Shit,” he said again, panting, “sorry. Thought the worst of this fuckin’ cold was behind mbe but – ISHHOO! Snrf. Apparently ndot.” He wiped his nose on the back of his hand and cringed. “I understand if you don’t want to stay,” he said, giving Greyson an apologetic look.
Greyson remained unfettered. “Reed,” he said, taking a step back towards the other man. “Stop talking. And get in bed.”
Reed’s face colored. He opened his mouth to say something, but Greyson cut him off with another kiss.
“What did I just say?” Greyson asked, taking off his t-shirt and unbuttoning Reed’s expensive-looking button down. “Get in the bed -” - he yanked the shirt off the smaller man and licked him, navel to collar bone, prompting a moan - “- and let me take care of you.”
To his credit, Reed did as he was told. He did as he was told all night long.
***
“Lij, I don’t want to alarm you.”
“Greyson, I don’t want to hear it. Zip it. I’m being so serious right now.”
“I don’t want to alarm you,” Greyson repeated, slamming the rest of the bottle of Pedialyte and holding onto the prep table as if for dear life, “but I think I may be dying. I think I may need you to call me an ambulance.”
Elijah swung his chair around and strode towards the chef. He took the sunglasses Greyson had placed on his face the moment he walked inside the bright kitchen and tossed them across the room. He regarded the chef with an annoyance usually reserved for parents of crying toddlers at Disneyland.
“Your drinking antics, Grey, are what most people would describe as ‘a you problem’. You decide to get unreasonably wasted and then come in to prep one of the biggest dinners of your career? That’s a you problem. I don’t want to hear it. The only thing I want to hear is your knife going into and out of different types of food.”
“Does that mean you don’t want to hear about the incredibly hot guy I hooked up with last night?” Greyson asked, a smile blooming at his lips. Elijah, despite himself, felt his eyebrows raise halfway up his face.
“But you haven’t slept with anyone in months,” he said, annoyed at himself for taking the bait but too curious to stop himself from saying anything. “I thought you were on a self-imposed time-out?”
Greyson shrugged, pushed his hair into a bun at the top of his head, and secured it with an elastic. “I was,” he said. “But - and you’re not going to believe this, but it’s true – I am finally feeling… I dunno. Healed?”
“Healed?” Elijah asked, snorting. “I think you’ve been taking too many hot yoga classes. Like, spiritually healed?”
Greyson tipped his head back and forth, considering. “Kind of,” he said. “Like… ready. Moved on from Collin. Prepared to get back out there for real, not in a self-punishing way.”
Elijah whistled, long and low. “Wow,” he said, patting Greyson’s back. “Well, congrats, man. A little over a year and you’re finally back on your feet. That’s actually quite impressive.”
“Thanks,” Greyson laughed, shoving Elijah playfully. “I was also really drunk and you know nothing stops drunk-Greyson when he decides he’s going to sleep with someone.”
“There it is,” Elijah said, rolling his eyes and laughing. “So… tell me about him. Did you get his name?”
Greyson dead-panned his boss as he pulled knives out of his bag and cracked his neck. “Yes, I got his name, Elijah. That’s what healed people do, they get people’s names before sleeping with them, and I am, as previously stated, healed.”
Elijah flipped the chef off lazily, non-committal. “Well, out with it then,” he said. “What’s his name? Tell me about the night.”
“His name is Reed Parker, and we fucked til the sun came out,” Greyson said simply, laughing at his own gregariousness. He looked up when he realized that Elijah wasn’t laughing – in fact, his face had gone stark-white. “What?”
“Reed Parker?” Elijah asked, pulling out his phone. “You’re sure that’s his name?”
“Umm, according to him at least, yeah,” Greyson said, unwrapping a pan with a cleaned striploin in it. “Why, do you know him?”
“No,” Elijah said, pushing his phone towards Greyson. “But if that’s him, we’re going to know him in two days.”
Greyson looked down at the phone and felt the wave of nausea he’d been holding back all morning wash over him – oh. Oh, no.
Pulled up on Elijah’s phone was an Instagram post from The Foodie Society – a group of well-acclaimed food critics and writers in the city. The group that was hosting a dinner at Elliot’s in two days. The group that would likely be the deciding factor in whether Greyson got nominated for a James Beard award this year.
We are so excited to announce Reed Parker, writer of the extremely popular food blog, ‘Eat Like You Mean It’, as our newest Foodie Society member! Reed has been a prolific writer and food critic in the city for nearly five years, and we are so delighted to have him aboard. Can’t wait to collaborate with you, Reed!
Above the blurb was a photo of – undoubtedly – the man that Greyson had slept with the night before. He looked markedly healthier in the photo, and his hair was a little longer, but there wasn’t any was it wasn’t him. Greyson swallowed hard.
“Oh… shit,” Greyson muttered, lowering himself to the floor. “Oh, no.”
“Maybe he was drunk, too?” Elijah said, the panic clear in his voice. “Maybe he won’t remember?” Elijah kneeled down next to Greyson, trying to console him. “Hey, Grey, it’s alright. Obviously you guys didn’t know who the other one was. It’s not like he’s going to think you slept with him to get the nomination. It was just drunk sex. Right?”
“He gave me an out,” Greyson muttered, shaking his head. He looked up at Elijah, eyes wild. “Maybe he did know, or maybe he figured it out on the walk back to his place, because he gave me a fuckin’ out.”
“What do you mean?” Elijah asked, pulling Greyson back to his feet. The chef stood, but placed his head in his hands and his elbows on the prep table, as if to steady himself.
“He was getting over some sort of sickness, and he said he’d understand if I didn’t want to stay. He basically told me to get out and I just… fuck. I told him I didn’t care, and I stayed the night. Shit. I’m never going to get nominated now. There’s no fucking way.” Greyson rubbed both hands down his face and shook his head in disbelief. “I fucked myself.”
“Greyson,” Elijah said, taking his friend’s chin and lifting it so their eyes met. “You didn’t fuck yourself. Okay? He didn’t know it was you. It was a mistake, and also he’s brand new there, it’s not like he’s THE deciding factor. Just – wait, did you say he was sick?”
Greyson, his chin still in Elijah’s fingers, looked away from his boss with just his eyes. “Uhh… I mean, yeah, kind of, I guess. He had some sort of cold, I think.”
“You purposely slept with someone who was sick three days before this huge dinner?”
“Umm… did I mention I was really drunk?”
Elijah sighed loudly and threw his hands in the air. “Never a dull fuckin’ moment with you, is there?” he mumbled, storming into the office and pillaging through their medicine cabinet. He returned a moment later with Emergen-C and Airborne in his hands. “Take those.”
“Yes, sir,” Greyson muttered, pulling them to his side of the table. “Sorry.”
“I think it’s crazy that out of all the millions of people you probably saw yesterday, the one you just so happened to pick is a food writer who could decide your future fate who also had a fucking cold. There wasn’t a single other person in the city you could sleep with?”
“Apparently not,” Greyson muttered, pouring Emergen-C into his water bottle. Elijah took a deep breath before continuing.
“Let’s just… let’s try to get through the next couple days,” he said, heading back to the office. “I am glad you want to get back out there,” he continued from afar, “just maybe give them a cursory Google before you bang them next time. Okay?”
Greyson, completely deflated, just nodded. He swallowed and thought he could already feel a twinge of a sore throat, which would just figure. His dick had sealed his fate. Fuck.
***
Tuesday, May 12
NEW MESSAGE
Matt
3:53pm
r u almost back??? idk how much longer I can handle them at each others throats.
Mark
3:58pm
On my way back now! Are they at each other’s throats again?? I thought they were over it..
Matt
3:59pm
has elijah ever REALLY been over smthn..? & greyson’s going down fast af so hes pissy.
Mark
4:02pm
It seemed like he was in the downward slide when I left...ugh. ok, I’ll be back in 15!
“We are ndot,” Greyson said from behind his sous chef, “at each other’s throats.”
Matt jumped at the sound of his boss’s voice and quickly clicked his phone screen off. “Don’t read my private texts, Chef, that’s rude.”
Greyson shrugged and pulled a tissue out of the box on the desk next to Matt. “Don’t talk shit about your boss and you don’t have to worry about mbe being ruuhh – huh! Hh...IGTSZHH-ue! Hh-NTSHZH-ue!” Greyson crumpled into the jacket he’d pulled over his chef’s coat to sneeze. His hair fell over his face, blocking the grimace he hid as he sucked in through his nose.
“Bless you, moron,” Elijah called from the dining room. Greyson rolled his eyes so hard he felt it splinter in his head. Matt winced when he saw Greyson shudder with pain, and stood from the desk.
“The prep sheets for tomorrow are all written, Chef, tell me how I can help you,” he said, guiding Greyson into the chair. Greyson allowed himself to be sat down, despite his better judgment.
“I feel pretty good about -”
“You feel pretty good? Is that a joke?” Elijah asked, pushing through the swinging kitchen doors and leaning on the office door frame. Greyson gave his boss the dirtiest look he could muster and turned back to Matt without a word to his boss.
“I feel confident about the first three courses for tomborrow’s dinner, but the steak and dessert I feel like we’re way behind. Plus I have ndo idea how the guys are looking for service tondight, so pick which one of those you’d rather tackle and I’ll – hhuh! Hh...HUHESTZHH-ue! Fuck, snrf.” Greyson grabbed another tissue and blew his nose before finishing. “I’ll do the other onde.”
Matt nodded while Elijah stood wordlessly in the doorway. “I’ll get with the guys and help them with tonight, make sure it goes smooth,” he said. Greyson nodded back and his sous looked away and scurried towards the line. Elijah, in stark contrast, pushed past Greyson and sat at the other end of their shared desk, unwilling to look away from the mess that was the executive chef.
“How ya feeling?” he asked finally. Greyson pulled another tissue out of the box just in time.
“HRTSHH-ue!” he sneezed into the tissue and let a tickling flurry of coughs escape as well. Elijah sighed, looked into the kitchen, and reached past Greyson to shut the door to their office.
“How are you feeling,” he asked again. “Seriously.”
Greyson sighed wheezily and pulled a hand down his face. “Honestly?” he said, looking Elijah in the eye, “like fuckin’ shit.”
Elijah sighed as well. “You seemed okay when you came in this morning,” he said, as though it mattered.
“I felt okay this mborning,” Greyson admitted. “I mean, I felt like it was coming but I definitely didn’t feel this… shitty.” He shrugged. “It just… I don’t kndow. Hit mbe out of nowhere.”
Elijah nodded. “I mean, if you want to leave so you’re good for tomorrow, you know I’ll understand.” Greyson just scoffed.
“I have so mbuch shit to do before tomborrow,” he said, sucking in through his nose and coughing again. “There’s ndo way in hell.”
They sat in silence for a few moments, until Elijah sighed. “Fuck, Greyson. I’m really sorry.” He looked up at his friend, the true pity evident on his face. “I know how important this dinner is to you. It’s still going to be great, okay? If you need to par it down, do it. It’s not like they know what’s on the menu til tomorrow. I’m cutting off reservations tonight so you can go home early, okay? We’re going to make this work.”
Greyson had to set his jaw to keep from tearing up. “It’s mby own damn fault,” he said. “Ndo need to baby mbe – hh...HTSHH-ue! HRTSHH! NTSHH! Huh! Huhhh-ETSZHHH-uee!” Greyson collapsed into his own lap, lapsed into coughs again. Elijah handed him a water bottle, which he took the cap off of while wiping his nose with the other hand.
“Can we go back to you being a dick to mbe?” Greyson asked, his voice rough. “That I can handle.”
Elijah pressed his lips together to keep from smiling. “Sure, Chef. Get your lazy ass up and start prepping,” he joked, pushing Greyson’s arm lightly. “Sitting is for the weak.”
Greyson smirked, an attempt at a laugh that wouldn’t make him cough. “Thanks, Lij,” he said. “Let’s get this stupid fuckigg show on the road.”
***
Course One
Compressed Cantaloupe
tarragon | smoked sea salt | brown butter crumble
Reed sat in the cushy, velvet chair and attempted to make himself comfortable. He hoped beyond hope that this dinner would go as quickly as humanly possible.
After their little rendevouz at the club, of course Reed had looked Greyson up; in this day and age, who wouldn’t look up their previous night’s partner, if only to make sure they weren’t some sort of psycho killer. And after he looked him up, of course he realized that oh. It was that Greyson Abbott. The same one whose food he was about to be poised in front of. The one who he and his fellow writers gathered around this table were tasked with deciding whether or not he was worthy of a Beard nod.
Of course.
Reed shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. The other writers had started talking immediately and, this being his first dinner with them, he was feeling awkward and left out. He really could have used the distraction of talking about their craft, but apparently he would have to earn a word tossed in his direction. This was going to be a long evening.
At least the restaurant is beautiful, Reed thought to himself. He’d never been to Elliot’s before, and now he was kicking himself for it. The wrap-around bar, the view of the park, the chandeliers… everything was gorgeous. He just wished he wasn’t here with these people, under the circumstance that his fling was in the kitchen plating up. That put a bit of a damper on things.
“Good evening,” a husky voice came from the head of the table, and Reed whipped his head to see a gorgeous plate of food placed in front of him, and the absolute god of a man he’d slept with a few days before standing just feet from him. Reed swallowed hard.
“I’mb Greyson,” Greyson said, and Reed immediately clocked the congestion in his voice. So you did give him that cold. Asshole, Reed chided himself. Greyson attempted to clear his throat before continuing.
“If you’ll excuse mby voice, I’mb at the tail end of a cold,” he continued, and Reed felt his face flame. Tail end, he thought. Yeah, sure.
“Our first course is compressed cantaloupe,” Greyson said. “I hope you enjoy. Pardon mbe, I have to get back to screaming at mby cooks.”
The group laughed in earnest as the chef walked away. Reed, too embarrassed to even look at the other writers, just picked up his fork and gathered a bite on it. He stuck it in his mouth and closed his eyes.
Christ, Reed thought, he cooks as well as he fucks.
Course Two
Hamachi
yuzu pearls | grapefruit | coconut crème
“I swear to God, Mbatt, what is goigg on?” Greyson yelled the moment he walked back into the kitchen. “We’re already behind, and none of the hamachi is on the plates yet? Can we please get it the fuck together che – ehh! HhITSZHH-uh! HRITSZHH-ue!”
Greyson yanked his chef’s coat over his nose and mouth and ducked away from the plates. The cooks called, “Bless, Chef,” and Elijah came up behind him with Sudafed – “The good shit, from behind the pharmacist counter,” he’d promised Greyson earlier, when he made an emergency trip to Walgreens for medicine – and popped two into his hand.
“I just took two,” Greyson croaked, sucking in through his nose.
“Well, it sounds like they’ve already worn off,” Elijah countered. Greyson swallowed the pills and coughed. “Is he out there?”
“Of course he’s out there, Lij, did you think he’d cancel because of mbe?” Greyson said, washing his hands and heading towards the pass to place hamachi on plates. “Like you said, hopefully he doesn’t remember.”
“Hard to forget a giant, loud, blonde buffoon who’s sporting the cold you just got over,” Elijah murmured, and Greyson flipped him off. “Just saying,” Elijah said.
“I don’t have timbe to think about him,” Greyson said, swallowing painfully. “I can’t think about anything but this.”
Elijah nodded. “You’re right,” he said. “Let me jump in with the pearls.”
Course Three
Lamb Lollipop
harissa | mint chutney | bbq ‘chip’
“Pretty incredible, right?”
These were the first words uttered to Reed all night, said moments after the third course was placed in front of him and seconds after Greyson disappeared back into the kitchen. Reed could see him dip into an elbow to sneeze before he made it back to the kitchen. He cringed; poor guy. This was all his fault.
“Reed?”
The writer who’d spoken to him waved a hand in front of his face to snap him out of his stupor. Reed pulled his head back to the table and smiled. “Really incredible,” he said. “I mean, this guy has talent.”
“For sure,” the other writer said. “I mean, he’s been hoping for a Beard nod for years.”
“Yeah?” Reed asked, hungry for any bit of lore he could get about Greyson. The other writer dug into his lamb as he nodded.
“About five years,” he said. “The menu is deemed as one of the best in the city, and he changes it every single day. I mean, the guy’s an animal.”
Reed nodded slowly. He could only imagine how hard Greyson had worked, how nervous he was, especially with Reed's stupid ass sitting here to judge him. Especially when Greyson was sick as a dog.
“That he is,” Reed said, and he took another incredible bite.
Course Four
Rutabaga Tart
fennel | feta | cured egg yolk
“Matt can put these on the plates, Chef,” Elijah said, putting a hand on Greyson’s back. “Take a quick break before you have to talk to them again. Drink some water. Blow your nose.”
Greyson shook his head, pushed the flop sweat off his forehead. “This is mby shot. These are mby plates,” he said, his voice just above a whisper. “I’mb here until the end.”
Elijah pressed his lips together and flashed Matt a look. The sous chef just raised his eyebrows and gave a little shrug. Once Greyson was like this… well, there was certainly no arguing with him.
“Okay,” Elijah said. “I’ll make you some tea, then.”
“Thank you, Lij,” Greyson managed, before ducking under the pass to sneeze into the collar of his chef’s coat. “God, fuck, I’mb gonna have to throw this thing away after this.”
“More like burn it,” Matt countered, prompting the first laugh from Greyson all evening.
“Burn it is right,” Greyson said. “HHITSZHH-ue!”
Course Five
Striploin
deconstructed bearnaise | white asparagus | duxelle
The fifth course was placed in front of them, and the writers looked up expectantly at Greyson.
“Forgive mbe,” Greyson said, his voice strained to a whisper. “I’ve yelled mbyself out in the kitchen, so mby number-two will introduce your last two courses.”
The writers tutted or laughed and looked over towards the sous chef – everyone except Reed. Reed was staring at Greyson, hoping he could hear his thoughts. I’m sorry you’re sick. I’m sorry I’m here. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.
The sous finished the description and the writers began to eat once again. Reed was sure he could hear the younger chef say to Greyson, “Just one more, Chef,” as they walked back to the kitchen.
Reed sighed and took a bite of his steak. He closed his eyes; perfection.
He did not deserve to be here.
Course Six
Matcha Milk Bombe
coffee | pastry crumb
Greyson placed the final pastry onto the final plate and turned away to cough as the servers brought his final plate of food to the critics. He felt like he was attending his own funeral.
“I don’t think I can go out there again, Lij,” Greyson said, shaking his head and crouching down on the ground. “I can’t look at all of themb, I’ve embarrassed myself enough.”
“You haven’t embarrassed yourself at all, Grey,” Elijah promised, pushing Greyson’s sweaty hair out of his face. “But I understand if you’re too exhausted. I’ll go out for the last one, thank them all for being here.”
“Please,” Greyson said. Elijah nodded, stood, and left the kitchen to meet the writers, while Matt nodded towards the office.
“Go,” he said to his boss. “Sit. You did it.”
Greyson shook his head. “Gotta clean mbyself up first,” he said, standing and moving towards the kitchen doors. “I’mb using the damn guest bathroom, fuck those pretentious assholes.”
Matt laughed in earnest. “You’ve earned it for sure, Chef.”
Greyson slipped into the guest bathroom, hoping no one saw him, and locked himself in a stall. Finally, he sat down and let himself go.
“HITSHH-ue!” Greyson sneezed into the open, then quickly grabbed a handful of toilet paper to keep from becoming the restaurant’s biggest biohazard. “HTTSHH! IIITZSCHUE! Huh! Hh…. huh, huhhh… huhhETSZHHH-ue! Huh! HRRRSHHH! Fuuuck mbe.” Greyson blew his nose, beyond exhaustion. He felt like shit. He knew he looked like shit. He’d put out shit food, he’d been in a shit mood… this whole thing was just… shit.
Finally, feeling a little more cleared out, Greyson flushed the toilet paper and unlocked the stall. When he exited, he nearly jumped out of his skin. There, in the doorway, was his fling - Reed.
“Jesus,” Greyson said, placing a hand on his chest. “Give a guy a fuckin’ heart attack.”
Reed shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot, then let Greyson by to wash his hands. “Sorry,” he said, “I didn’t mean to scare you. Bless you. By the way.”
Greyson huffed out a laugh. “Thangks,” he said, drying his hands. “Sombe cold you’re passing around town. Shouldn’t you be finishing your meal? Or was it so bad you’re here to hock it back up?”
“It was incredible,” Reed said earnestly. “Truly, Greyson. Thank you. I… I’m sorry. For being here, for getting you sick, I – I didn’t know that this place was… um… yours.”
“Mmm, more Elijah’s than mbine,” Greyson mumbled, looking away from Reed’s face. “But, uh… thank you. Glad you enjoyed. Hopefully it's ndot for nothing.”
"I don't think it will be. They all had nothing but good things to say. I'm just the grunt, but I mean...you have my vote. You're... You're incredible," Reed said, the words escaping his mouth before he could even consider what he was saying.
Greyson tried to hide a small smile by looking down. They both stood awkwardly until Greyson cleared his throat. “I, uh… better get back to mby guys,” he said, starting towards the door.
“I had an amazing time the other night,” Reed blurted out suddenly. “I, um… I haven’t stopped thinking about it, actually.”
Greyson smirked, the tension finally broken. “Yeah?” he asked. Reed nodded.
“Yeah,” he said, rubbing his neck awkwardly. “You’re… you’re hard to shake.”
Greyson took a step closer to Reed, looking him in the eye now. He sniffled, rubbed his nose, and crossed his arms, a smile dancing on his lips. “Who are you, Reed Parker?” he asked. Reed’s face flushed bright red.
“I – I don’t know what you mean. I’m a food writer.”
“Mmm,” Greyson nodded. “Well, Reed the food writer who can’t get mbe out of his mind, at the moment I’m a bit, uh… incapacitated. But,” Greyson pulled a Sharpie out of his coat’s side pocket and grabbed Reed’s hand, “if I’m still rattling around in your brain in a few days… give mbe a call.” Greyson coughed into his shoulder, capped the Sharpie, and gave Reed a little smile.
“I will,” Reed said, biting his cheek. “Thank you. For, um… dinner.”
Greyson paused, thinking, then took a bold step towards Reed, grabbed his chin in his hand, and planted a deep kiss on his lips. “It was my pleasure,” he said, and stepped out of the room.
Reed stood, flushed and breathless, for a moment. The kiss sat, swelling his lips, sweeter than any dessert he’d ever had; he looked at the number on his hand, felt his heart catch in his throat.
Greyson Abbott, he thought, looking towards the bathroom door. Holy shit.
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ourflagmeansgayrights · 2 months
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so part of me wants to blame this entirely on wbd, right? bloys said he was cool with the show getting shopped around, so assuming he was telling the truth (not that im abt to start blindly trusting anything a CEO says lol), that means it’s not an hbo problem. and we already know wbd has an awful track record with refusing to sell their properties—altho unlike coyote v acme, s3 of ofmd isn’t a completed work and therefore there isn’t the same tax writeoff incentive to bury the thing. i just can’t see any reason to hold on to ofmd except for worrying about image, bc it would be embarrassing if they let this show go with such a devoted fanbase and recognizable celebrities and it went somewhere else and did really well (which it would undoubtedly do really well, we’ve long since proven that). it feels kinda tinfoil hat of me to making assumptions abt what’s going on in wbd behind the scenes, but i also feel like there are hints that i’m onto something w my suspicions: suddenly cracking down on fan merch on etsy doesn’t seem like something a studio looking to sell their property would bother with, and we know someone was paying to track the viewing stats on ofmd’s bbc airing, which isn’t finished yet, so i’d expect whoever is monitoring that to not make a decision abt buying ofmd until the s2 finale dropped.
but also i think part of me just wants there to be a clear villain in the situation. it’s kinda comforting to have a face to blame, a clear target to shake my fist at. but the truth is that the entire streaming industry is in the shitter. streaming is not pulling in the kind of profit that investors were promised, and we’re seeing the bubble that was propped up w investor money finally start to pop. studios aren’t leaving much room in their budgets for acquiring new properties, and they’re whittling down what they already have. especially w the strikes last year, they’re all penny pinching like hell. and that’s much a much harder thing to rage against than just one studio or one CEO being shitty. that’s disheartening in a way that’s much bigger and more frightening than if there was just one guy to blame.
my guess is that the truth of the situation is probably somewhere in the middle. wbd is following the same shitty pattern they’ve been following since the merger, and it’s just a hard time for anyone trying to get their story picked up by any studio. ofmd is just one of many shows that are unlucky enough to exist at this very unstable time for the tv/streaming industry.
when i think abt it that way, tho, i’m struck by how lucky we are that ofmd even got to exist at all. if the wbd merger had happened a year earlier, or if djenks and tw tried to pitch this show a year later, there’s no way this show would’ve been made. s1 was given the runtime and the creative freedom needed to tell the story the way the showrunners wanted to, and the final product benefited from it so much that it became a huge hit from sheer gay word of mouth. and for all the imperfections with s2—the shorter episode order, the hard 30 minute per episode limit, the last-minute script changes, the finale a butchered mess of the intended creative vision—the team behind ofmd managed to tell a beautiful story despite the uphill battle they undoubtedly were up against. they ended the season with the main characters in a happy place. ed and stede are together, and our last shot of ed isn’t of him sobbing uncontrollably (like i rlly can’t stress enough how much i would have never been able to acknowledge the existence of this show again if s1 was all we got)
like. y’all. we were this close to a world where ofmd never got to exist. for me, at least, the pain of an undue cancellation is worth getting to have this story at all. so rather than taking my comfort in the form of righteous anger at david zaslav or at wbd or at the entire streaming industry as a whole, i’m trying to focus on how lucky i am to get to have the show in the first place.
bc really, even as i’m reeling in grief to know this is the end of the road for ofmd, a part of me still can’t quite wrap my head around that this show is real. a queer romcom about middle-aged men, a rejection of washboard abs and facetuned beauty standards, a masterful deconstruction and criticism of toxic masculinity, well-written female characters who get to shine despite being in a show that is primarily about manhood and masculinity, diverse characters whose stories never center around oppression and bigotry, a casually nonbinary character, violent revenge fantasies against oppressors that are cathartic but at the same time are not what brings the characters healing and joy, a queer found family, a strong theme of anti colonialism throughout the entire show. a diverse writers room that got to use their perspectives and experiences to inform the story. the fact that above all else, this show is about the love story between ed and stede, which means the character arcs, the thoughts, the feelings, the motivations, the backstories, and everything else that make up the characters of ed and stede are given the most focus and the most care.
bc there rlly aren’t a lot of shows where a character like stede—a flamboyant and overtly gay middle-aged man who abandoned his family to live his life authentically—gets to be the main character of a romcom, gets to be the hero who the show is rooting for.
and god, there definitely aren’t a lot of shows where a character like ed—a queer indigenous man who is famous, successful, hyper-competent, who feels trapped by rigid standards of toxic hypermasculinity, who yearns for softness and gentleness and genuine interpersonal connection and vulnerability, whose mental health struggles and suicidal intentions are given such a huge degree of attention and delicate care in their depiction, who messes up and hurts people when he’s in pain but who the show is still endlessly sympathetic towards—gets to exist at all, much less as the romantic lead and the second protagonist of the show.
so fuck the studios, fuck capitalism, fuck everything that brought the show to an end before the story was told all the way through. because the forces that are keeping s3 from being made are the same forces that would’ve seen the entire show canceled before it even began. s3 is canceled, and s2 suffered from studio meddling, but we still won. we got to have this show. we got to have these characters. there’s been so much working against this show from the very beginning but here we are, two years later, lives changed bc despite all odds, ofmd exists. they can’t take that away from us. they can’t make us stop talking abt or stop caring abt this show. i’m gonna be a fan of this show til the day i die, and the studios hate that. they hate that we care about things that don’t fit into their business strategy, they hate that not everyone will blindly consume endless IP reboots and spin-offs and cheap reality tv.
anyway i dont rlly have a neat way to end this post. sorta just rambling abt my feelings. idk, i know this sucks but im not rlly feeling like wallowing in it. i think my gratitude for the show is outweighing my grief and anger, at least for right now. most important thing tho is im not going anywhere. and my love for this show is certainly not fucking going anywhere.
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coriphallus · 2 months
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A little rant on patch 6 and the implications for bg3's future
Okay, bear with me for a sec its gonna go somewhere eventually. My first bg3 run (thats spammed here on this blog) i played ascended astarion/dark urge romance where i picked the reject bhaal and become the absolute ending.
as it was my first playthrough on release i was vibrating off mt seat and i didnt really have elaborate HCs or anything, i was just doing a quick evil run until the bugs get sorted out. i didn't think much beyond "yes this dude would want the shiny stones for himself"
first time i saw astarion enthralled, i was confused. he asked me to do it, he was quite insistent on it since the beginning of the game. i was confused for a couple of hours, digesting the entire game i just played. Then it hit me; the game was calling me out. it was telling me ive been stupid for not having seen this coming and at that point i felt awe.
it was right, everything pointed to this, it was right in front of my eyes all i needed was to connect the dots that the game laid out quite visibly and i was just too caught up to see.
'well my durge would never do that' didnt matter because thats exactly what the companions thought. Gale thought the powers of an insatiable weave wouldnt corrupt him, that he'd stay true to himself, shadowheart thought shar had blessed and her she'd guide her, that she could be her true self under her influence, astarion thought he'd be free, that he'd cherish the bond he'd made with the player but at the end of the day power reveals; and when that power is acquired through the corpses of thousands its quite evident that Absolute power corrupts absolutely. IT WAS IN THE FKIN NAME.
it was a shining bait i was so focused on getting my hands on that i didn't look back to see the mountain of corpses i had to step on to get there. the game was telling me 'HEY LOOK AT EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE TO GET HERE, LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE OTHERS WHO THOUGHT THEY COULD ACHIEVE THIS, DO YOU THINK YOU'D HOLD HANDS AND SING KUMBAYA WITH YOUR FRIENDS AFTER ALL THIS?'
just as there was never an option where frodo could stab saurons flaming eyeball and sit on his throne with the ring on his finger and sam at his side, there was never an ending i could get my 'happy ending' the way id like it to. i wanted frodo to remain in middle earth and have some peace in the end, i didnt understand how he was 'too changed' to remain and sam wasnt when i first read the books. i was angry even, that i didnt get what i wanted. it wasnt like tolkien haphazardly put together an ending out of his ass bcs he didnt know what to do with the characters, its not that he didn't think while writing that the fans would hate it, he wrote a story that achieved its catharsis by reaching its narrative conclusion. it couldnt have done that any other way. it was deliberate. i may not have understood or agreed at the time but it was the story he wanted to tell, and it wouldnt be one of the greatest stories ever told if the writer wanted to please a 10 y/o like myself.
it was never out of character for my durge at all, i was just blissfully avoiding the NARRATIVE.
months later we get this absolute narrative abomination:
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and all i can say is im worried.
im worried bcs this is a clear disrespect to the story they've written, im worried bcs if they can do off with huge plot elements and beats such as this just like that it shows a lack of commitment to their own plot and if a huge Point of the game can be treated like a minor mistake than what else can? was is just a lack of oversight that laezel gets killed under vlaakith? can it be waved off if enough vlaakith loving gith players come together and shout loud enough that they want to ride alongside their queen with their gith gf?
what part of the game is tangible to hold on to, and after two years worth of patches that are made to appease the fans at the expense of the story, will it still be the game i fell in love with?
i dont blame the fans for wanting, i blame the devs for delivering. that they could sacrifice the integrity of a pretty straightforward story bodes ill tidings for the future of this game.
yes i wanted this feature, but i was glad i wasn't given it. i may have been confused and slightly miffed that i didn't get to reign supreme with my evil bf, but i immensely respected the game that could call me out on it. i wish they could show the same respect to their own writing.
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wilcze-kudly · 1 month
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I really want to see your post about how Katara is forcefully matured by the fandom, please!
Ok, while I wasn't ready to make that post in earnest, and frankly never might be, here's some of my cursory thoughts on the topic. I'd gladly talk about it in detail more but also ✨️fear✨️
So, let's get the obvious out of the way. Katara is a 14 year old. A child, barely a teen. In fact, the entirety of the gaang is made up of children.
Now, I haven't been fully active in the atla fandom in quite some time, mostly lurking on the peripheries, because the fandom is a shitshow. One of the reasons being the fact that most fans cannot, for the life of them handle the Gaang's inherent childishness.
This isn't just a Katara problem. Other than her, Aang suffers the most for the egregious crime of being a 12 year old survivor of a genocide. Suki is, of course, mainly ignored. The interpretations of Toph can vary wildly, from her being horrifically matured to being dissmissed as a chaotic, rude child. Zuko and Sokka's immature moments are looked at more permissively, being an angsty boi™️ and a goofy goober respectively.
I do find it odd that Aang doesn't get the "boys will be boys" pass, but ok, we'll blame it on him being... bald? a nice boy? not concerned with his own masculinity?
As for Katara, her maturity is treated like... a given. She's the mom of the group, the proverbial love interest, the feminist icon, the badass fighter, the trailblazer filled with feminine rage. The trophy wife to Aang, the (Lore Olympus style) Persephone to Zuko's Hades.
And true, she is, or at least can be, a lot of these things.
However she is, first and foremost, a child. This fact is presented to us on a silver platter in the first episode, when her and Aang are penguin sledding.
Katara : I haven't done this since I was a kid!
Aang: You still are a kid!
Katara is a child forced to mature. Her circumstances forced her to try to fill her mother's place and to fight for those who couldn't do so themselves. The fandom brands her as a mom friend. Sees her purely as an icon of empowerment. Or worse, degrades her character to being a love interest.
(im talking about both sides of the kataang/zutara debate. I have my biases, but I'm sure there are kataangers who treat her like this as well. I simply have encountered very few of them.)
Her story, while yes, has many themes of female empowerment is in huge part, a tragedy. The tragedy of a young girl forced to grow up much too soon.
Sadly, this is rarely spoken about. It's not spoken about directly and therefore a lot of the fandom doesn't see this. (Or simply doesn't want to see it)
This is not to say that Katara's more mature aspects should be dismissed or buried. She displays a lot of maturity for her age, to the point of being able to go toe to toe both intellectually and physically with the (admittedly usually incompetent) adults of the show. Additionally, she evolves as a character through the durtation of the show.
But a huge chunk of her maturity being forced and therefore unhealthy is a key aspect of her character.
I think what upsets me the most is that while the critiquing the idea of Katara being treated as the mom of the group in fanon is becoming more and more common, the treatment of her as something akin to a YA protagonist is on the rise.
Both these interpretations are so insulting to the character of Katara, what is wrong with you people?
I'm currently rewatching atla with a focus on Katara as a character (while also trying to give zutara a chance I am doing my best guys) and her childishness is an integral part of her. It's sad to see her treated as an adult by the fandom. And honestly unsettling, especially with how much of like a child she acts.
I wanna finish my rewatch before I give my full ramble on the topic. I also wanna look more into the many different opinions people in the atla fandom have on Katara's treatment by the show. Though even trying to skim the surfce was like injecting lemon juice directly into my tear ducts. Also I really, really don't wanna get sent death threats again.
I want to give the topic of Katara my full attention. However I don't think I'll ever make this post, actually. The atla fandom is a rabid horrid pack of creatures and I'm not sure if I wanna engage with all that.The post would probably bash a lot of things considered key arguments for Zutara, since, looking at Zutara through a child's doesn't exactly scream 'romance' and do I really want that on my blog?
Katara's role as a child isn't valued as much as her role as a woman and I just don't want to deal with people calling me mean names for talking about a little girl being traumatised.
I'd be glad to have a discussion but I made this blog mainly to have fun and enjoy a piece of media I like. I met some truly amazing people whom I can have really great discussions with, even if we don't agree. I don't want to jeopardise that by being a pretentious dick on a soapbox.
Call this and the last few posts I made on Katara me testing the waters.
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ganondoodle · 4 months
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I was at first in love with totk, and I still think mechanical wise, its quite impressive
And when I collected all the tears and saw the "story" I genuinely got upset in a good way (at first), because man! Did they really got the balls to go that far? Is there nothing I can do for her? Now I MUST do all the temples, see how it plays out and --oh, I've got this cutscene already. Why are all the people so dumb about Zelda, I KNOW where she is, Link say something-- Link??
After finishing all the temples and almost falling asleep, I stopped playing the game, looked up the last boss and remaining cutscenes and went "Thats it?"
Watching other people (including you) being critically about so many things, both character and mechanical wise, I've almost startled myself with a realization what the gnawing feeling I constantly had, actually was.
Totk feels like a fanfic.
And don't get me wrong, I love fanfiction, I think its great and important, I adore fanfic writers, I love finding gems, I love reading self indulgent stories, see new spins and interpretation of characters. I love the casual, the passion, the creativity!
But totk gives me the same feeling everytime I am reminded that Fifty Shades is a Twillight fanfic.
The world is there. The faces I know and grew to love are there. But everything is ever so slightly different, uncannily so. Just how some characters talk, how they act, how they were placed in the story. The Zonai appearing out of nowhere, but no, they always had been there you see, they were these super magical advanced people but they all died, the king is so tragic. And you see, the king is super cool and powerful and-- oh I dont get to interact with him outside of the tutorial. Did they try to do another King Rhoam-- but wait, that only worked because we didn't knew he was a ghost-- totk wait stop why do you take him out of the story, why couldn't he be a companion, he IS ABLE TO TALK THROUGH THE ARM LET THE OLD GOAT COMMENT ON STUFF?? If you bring up all this ancient stuff and you still got a ghost lingering, let him talk?? (I never ended up getting Mineru but I smell wasted potential as well)
Im not even mad, I am disappointed. It feels like the devs saw what all the lore hunters got attached to and talked about and then just... took the "cool". All the Zonai stuff could've easily been Sheikah tech, but got just reskinned to look more exciting instead of being its own thing.
Like... at this point I prefer what fans are doing over what Totk gave us. The characterization of Rauru (and everything Zonai), projects like you do of what totk couldve been, the little nuggets of actual highlights and details of love fans find in the game. I found much more enjoyment in these concepts than I got from a 70bucks game. And thats depressing.
I love fanfiction. I dont love it when my corporate 70 dollar, six year development, console exclusive game feels like a story that passionate fan couldve written miles better in a week (and I've already seen much cooler and interesting rewrites and ideas).
Zelda has been a huge part of my childhood and its depressing seeing it treated like that. It always was about the story, the epic, its The Legend of Zelda for crying out loud. To be courageous to enter a dungeon, to be wise and solve all the riddles. To become powerful over the journey you embarked on. Zelda to me is the campfire story you tell to others and go into the woods or the beach and imagine what monsters you would slay. Zelda is not the sandcastle you build in the sandbox and then add dinosaurs and star wars ships because you didn't had any other toys, and just stumble into and over some story to entertain yourself until lunch is ready.
I'd have an oracle of seasons over another totk any day at this point. They should've just make the mechanics of totk its own thing, but I guess they were scared it wouldn't sell if it doesn't have a Mario or Zelda skin straped over it.
Anyways, sorry for the mini rant - love your art, love your thoughts and insights, and I am looking forward to see more of it - Zelda related or not (your original characters look amazing, I adore your style sm)
Hope you have a great rest of the day!
*nods along through this entire rant*
idk how many of my rants you have read but yeah ... yeah ... and the further you think about it the further it all falls apart, the wasted potential of it all and the goddamn audacity of them to do those interviews in which they make it EVEN WORSE is just
i know the expectation for a direct sequel to botw was huge and understandbly so but i really REALLY think it would not have been that hard to make it a good follow up even taking into account that totk was originally a DLC, pretty much all of botws aspects could have been developed further, i dont know what could have happened to make totk have turned out like this .. literally it feels like something had to have gone wrong, its like someone who doesnt know zelda nor botw at all was given a few prompts and then just made some generic fantasy story while the rest worked on ultrahand for 5 years
the technical impressive things ARE technical impressive, but i dont think it was necessary nor served the game well in any way (and i LOVE building games- however totk is neither a building game nor a story game nor a zelda game nor an exploration game nor a sequel imo) but zelda, this zelda, is not made for that and i cant help but think it was mainly to encourage people to make some ridiculous mechs so it can go viral on tiktok (not trying to discredit them, it IS cool what they are doing but i .... have my doubts if zelda is the right place for that)
ill stop there bc i have ranted so much about everything i dont wanna repeat it here again; it just doesnt feel like a real game (derogatory), it feels extra bad bc i was not really into zelda when botw came out and while i did get it as soon as i could (months after release since i just started a minijob and didnt have the money) i only over time grew to love zelda this much again, devouring any theories and anything about it bc i loved it so much- i was never into it like this when a new title was announced and dont own any special editions so i bought the totk collectors bc i was just so damn excited for it after the 2019 trailer dropped (god i want that time back ... it looked so much more like it was going to be an actual sequel) even if i was already worried it wouldnt be good at that point given how much i started to sense stuff i dont like about the newer trailers
i recently sold it at our local gameshop bc it was like a thorn in my side given how expensive it was and how dissapointed i was in the game, i genuinely think that, technical impressiveness aside, totk is the onyl zelda i truly cannot stand (for alot of reasons) and im genuinely worried for the future of the franchise
i bought an Oki (Okami) figurine for what i got back and i feel much happier with that :3
(also on a note, i did finish the game two weeks after release but stopped playing it right then and hadnt touched it since, i also streamed all of what i played and its still up if you want to see my slow descend into madness fjkdhkdhjk though its been a long while since then and i by far did not talk about everything back then, just what my most immediate frustrations were while still playing)
(also the gameplay isnt as good as people make it out to be, so much is so frustrating and punishing to use i am kinda baffled it got through like that and most people call that its best aspect ..... though i guess if the rest is so much worse even mid gameplay can seem good ooooooooh how dare i)
also thank you for liking what i do!!! <3 it means alot to know it is appreciated by someone :D
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lackofbrains · 5 months
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i dont really know how to work tumblr posts and im not really a good writer but i wanted to write a velvet x reader story since theres hardly any on here
story info:
its kind of angst but like ends with fluff or whatever its called
so basically you’re like a pop artists along with velvet an veneer, and you’re like almost more famous than them and velvet gets really jealous and starts to hate you, but in the end she realizes she doesnt.
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y/n's POV
"so y/n your new song is at the top of the charts!" the interviewer fred or whatever his name was said, i honestly couldnt care to remember his name. "yeah. im so greatful for everyone who listens to my songs i wouldn't be here without all of you!" i replied directing the last part towards the audience in front of me. they all cheered in response and i smiled a bit, loving the attention and thankful for the fans. "awww, thats so sweet! so we need to know, is there any new songs in the making?" he asked me really prominently on the need part. "welllllll" i drug out my word trying to thing of a good response. i get really awkward and anxious around huge crowds, kind of a bad thing for a pop star but. "i may be working on a new song, look out for teasers on my instagram." im so excited for the new song to release its definitely gonna be one of my best songs yet "okay we'll make sure to check!" he glanced down at his watch, i guess the interview was finally over thank goodness. "well, y/n. looks like our interview is sadly over, it was great having you thanks so much for coming" he said "no, thank you! this was great-" i stood from the comfy sofa i was on "and thank you all for coming!" as i said that the crowd went crazy, mount rageons screaming all over the place. it was kind of overwhelming so i probably walked faster than i needed to off stage, as i got backstage i blew out a sigh of relief, thankful for the opportunity to spread my music but also thankful it was over.
                                velvets POV
"ughhhhhhh" i groaned "i cant stand her and her goody two shoes self, shes so annoyinggggg" i complained to my brother, veneer. "shes not annoying velvet, she seems really nice." he replied to me, i abruptly took my feet off the coffee table they were on and turned to him. did he really just say that to me. "why are you defending our competition!" i basically screached at him, "sorry, velvet. i wasnt lying though, you just like to see the bad in people" he sighed, crossing his arms like the sassy twink he is. "i cant stand you sometimes! its like you want us to be second best." i really did not understand why he was defending someone thats trying to take MY crown. i got up off the couch and walked away from him, i mean yeah she may be nice and pretty but shes trying to take whats mine and that cannot happen."
(time skip to some award show thingy that i just made up bc it helps the plot)
                                y/n's POV
looking around i see so many different singers, some well known, some not as much and probably werent even invited in the first place. as my eyes scan the crowd of celebrities, looking for my friend, f/n, they land on no other than veneer himself, standing with my mortal enemy, velvet. the green haired twins were my competition and i had to beat them. i honestly didnt mind veneer too much, he seemed like a nice guy. velvet on the other hand, i had a totally different opinion on. ever since she basically said my music sucked in an interview of hers, and no i don't just watch all her interviews(yes you do dont lie), i havent liked her, thats an understatement. i cannot STAND velvet.
as i was in my own little word of dislike towards the prettier twin, i didnt notice someone standing right in front of me. i looked up expecting the brown caring eyes of f/n, only to be met with cold blue eyes. i sharply inhaled, to be honest scared out of my mind "y/n!" "what are you doing here?!" the green haired girl shriecked, "i was... invited..?" i replied in a hushed tone, not being able to find my voice. "well you shouldnt of been, your music sucks, and overall you dont deserve any award." she replied, flipping her hair asif i wasnt even there? "okay... well my song on top of the months best pop song chart says otherwise" i said turning around and walking away before she could hear the last part of that, she had really pretty eyes..
"y/n!" i hear from behind me, this time from a more scruffier voice. i turned around recognizing the voice was coming from f/n. "there you are! i was looking for you everywhere." "i saw.. i also saw your run in with the twins. tell me everything!" i groaned at that last bit "no f/n it was scary enough i dont need to repeat it." i replied also turning away from him "attention! all invited pop singers, please make your way to the stage!" 'finally' i thought to myself, ive had to wait an hour and a half through the rock, country andddd rap awards.
im going absolutely insane, why did i have to be seated RIGHT NEXT TO VELVET. its like torture, i could feel her eyes on me for the whole 10 minutes it took to introduce everyone, it was awful, but sort of nice in a way.
(time skip to the actual awards bc im a horrible writer and cannot care enough to try and fill the gap with sappyness)
"andddd the award goes to-" his eyes widened as he read the slip of paper with the award winners name on it "velvet and veneer-" he was interrupted once again only this time not by himself, but by the crowd behind him going crazy "wait!" he said and they all quieted down just enough to hear him, i looked beside me and velvets smile dropped hearing him say that "AND y/n y/ln!" the crowd went even louder this time, i gasped hearing my name "well dont just sit here come get the award..s?" all three of us walked torwards him, i looked to my left towards velvet and she actually smiled at me, and not even a condescending one! we both took the awards, as we walked back to our seats, velvets arm brushed against mine, i got so flustered i had to turn away so she didnt see me blushing. i dont know why i was acting so weird i hated her... right? "congratulations to the winners of this months most amazing pop stars!!" the crowd hadnt stopped yelling yet, i was fidgeting uncomfortably in my seat, picking at my hands, feeling a panic attack coming along, when suddenly i felt a hand on top of my own, locking fingers with me. i was so shocked i didnt even wanna look because i knew the amazingly pink painted nailed hands belonged to.... velvet.
she had held my hand the rest of the show, which in reality was about 10 minutes but felt like hours with her hand in mine, her hands were so soft.
(time skip to like after the show but like not left yet bc thats so unsexy an doesnt fit my amazing plot)
i was standing around the desert table talking to f/n, well it was really him talking about how much i deserved the award and how great my music is. he really knows how to make someone feel special. i looked around for velvet spotting her talking to her brother, i really wanted to speak to her, my "hatred" for her had turned to love in less than 3 hours.
"yeah you were obviously winning the awar-" f/n was cut off mid sentence by the green haired girl that i couldnt get out of my mind "hey y/n can i talk to you?" she asked me, her cold demeanor still up but i felt like there was something under her coldness, i followed her after muttering a quick "sorry" in f/n's direction.
we finally got to a deserted hallway when she finally spoke "are you okay?" she asked, cold demeanor slipping as soon as we were alone "y-yeah why wouldnt i be?" i asked stumbling over my words abit because of the close proximity between us..
velvets POV
her stuttering was kinda cute. "because you seemed like you were gonna pass out, babe" i couldn't catch myself before the pet name slipped out, i guess its out there that i dont reslly hate y/n now. i guess i just didnt like the idea of not being on top, but now that we're both on top its kinda nice. "oh yeah that..." she trailed off, blushing a bit, either from embarrassment or the pet name, probably the latter if we're being honest. "sorry, i just get a bit overwhelmed with thr crowds and loud screaming, which i know is weird since im a pop star- so i basically signed up for this-"y/n" "and they probably saw me too and they think i hate them now- and im gonna lose the award-"y/n" "and im not gonna be able to write music anymore because everyones gonna hate me, and ill have no money- and ill be homeless and-"y/n!" i finally got her attention finally silencing the rambling girl "sorry.." she looked really upset "its okay y/n, you dont need to apologize. you did nothing wrong i promise." i replied tucking a loose strand of hair behind her hair, finally noticing how close we were. "velvet" y/n whispered, as i cupped her cheek "hm?" i hummed leaning in a bit waiting for her to initiate what was about to happen(consent is sexy) "are you sure" she muttered "mhm" and with that she finally closed the gap, her soft lips meeting mine. when we finally seperated we were both panting from the lack of air. "that was..." "great" i finished her sentence. "would you wanna maybe, you know. go out tomorrow?" i asked, still a bit flustered from the kiss. "like a date?" she said teasingly "y-yeah. a date." "of course, what time are you picking me up" she said with a smirk "is 8 good?" "see you at 8 velvs" and with that she gave me one more peck and walked away.
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partyhorn · 18 days
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Have u ever posted your comic or animation workflow anywhere? Im super curious on how you tackle the process, especially not using a drawing tablet. I know you have a very simple (and adorable) style so that probably helps in terms of workflow -- Im just curious about the steps you take.
Thank you! With both comics and animation my key thing is to not spend too much time on any particular thing, just draw loose and fast. Honestly the only downside to drawing with a mouse is that I can tell my arm has extremely specific muscle memory regarding it- if my mouse breaks and I get a new one I have to spend a good month or so just letting my hand get used to it again lol. Same with if my setup gets readjusted too much- right now my setup is my mouse on one of those padded mousepads, on top of 2 books, with my elbow resting on my 3DS case (I'll get an actual pillow or something for it eventually lol). But luckily thanks to this I suffer very minimal wrist pain 👍
(...Okay I started to go really in depth in my process here, so sorry if this is way more than what you were asking. Putting it under a readmore just to save space lol)
With MFM in particular, I start by writing out the entire script for the next story arc, which really is just all of the dialogue and vague notes about any important actions. Then I do the paneling with very loose stick-figure like sketches of where the characters are and what they're doing. I prefer having very little planning when it comes to character poses and panel shapes, coming up with those on the fly makes things much more exciting and faster to make. But it's the opposite with dialogue... it needs to be 100% FINAL before I draw a single line lol.
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That's part of my script for my most recent chapter, as well as what my extremely loose goofy thumbnail sketching is like. I write the script as one big thing and don't separate it into pages until I actually start drawing- then I go and color change it just to keep track of what dialogue goes on each page
After that, I go back and do the ACTUAL sketch, as well as the lettering (I don't believe this is how it's done professionally. I used to do lettering as the very last step in the process... but then found it hard to cram speech bubbles in the right places lmao.) After that is lineart, coloring, background flat colors, then shading/rendering for all of it. I do each step in batches, as in I sketch out ALL pages of a chapter before moving to lineart, I line ALL pages before starting coloring, etc. I find it way easier to be productive when it's broken up like that, though when I first started the comic I used to draw each page to completion before starting the next (but also, the comic's style was DRASTICALLY simpler back then haha)
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(Unfortunately I merged some of the shading to the background flat colors so it's not entirely accurate... oops) FireAlpaca has a sand texture feature that I only found out about last year- adding that to the backgrounds makes them look 10x better with WAY less effort.
With animation, it depends on the project. For simple 5-10 second animation I make for fun, there's very little planning lol. I skip some steps in the process- I'll sketch out the keyframes (and maybe any difficult inbetweens if necessary), line those, then go straight into making linework inbetweens. I'm not a cleanup artist and have no experience in that, so I always find trying to line my rough animation makes everything jittery and wobbly. If I do it with a clean line from the start then I can avoid that and save a lot of time 👍
For my bigger projects (such as the Parvey cartoon and the MFM Kickstarter trailer), I do the whole animatic with final audio first and foremost, with the animatic being almost like the keyframes. I split them up into individual shots, .mp4 files anywhere between 1-30 seconds usually, and animate those one at a time. I'm a huge fan of free to use programs and try to use them as much as I possibly can, here's a list of the ones I use:
FireAlpaca- for the actual drawing part itself (storyboarding/animating/etc). FireAlpaca has a feature that lets you export every frame as it's own drawing, as well as an onion skin mode
Windows Movie Maker- for compiling all of those frames into video format, creating individual shots. If you upload all of your frames and set them to around 0.08 seconds, it equals about 12fps (I usually animate at 0.10 seconds/10fps, its a bit slower but looks nice)
Onlinesequencer.net- for making music. It's the place I've made all of my songs on, like the timeloop song, hyperworkaholic, and the background music for the MFM Kickstarter trailer.
Audacity- for editing audio/music. Also great for recording things directly from your desktop
DaVinci Resolve- for editing and putting together all of the shots into one big video. Can get kind of intensive on the computer during rendering, so watch out.
YouCut (app)- also for editing and compiling shots, I used this one a lot a couple years back but I'm not sure how well it holds up. Doesn't need much phone storage to download but needs a lot to render videos.
MS Paint (yes really)- for typing up text. FireAlpaca has a text option but I don't like it as much as Paint's.
...The only thing I genuinely can't do alone is voice acting. Luckily there's a big voice acting community on Twitter and they're all amazing to work with!
This got... way more in depth than I planned for it to be, so sorry if this is way more than what you were asking lol. But that's my general process when it comes to my art 👍
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aerequets · 1 year
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Hello again!
I was wondering if you had any spy x family fic recs that are twiyor centric? AUs? I’m having trouble finding ones that are what I’m looking for. Ratings don’t matter. Anything from G to E would be appreciated! Thank you!!
boy oh BOY do i have twiyor fic recs !!!! it's like basically all i read LMAO and i am always on a hunt for more. i feel like i have read through a good chunk of what's on ao3 and i still feel starved. there's always my bookmarks you can sift through for twiyor fics, but for some more curated recommendations (and this is not gonna include all the ones i've lost my mind over, that's far too many, this is just what i can remember off the top of my head):
the living blues by @nire-the-mithridatist
GOD it would be such an understatement to say i am a huge fan of not only this work but EVERY WORK by this author because SHE HAS A WAY WITH WORDS OKAY. i avoid angst like the plague but i saw the happy ending tag to this fic and IT DIDN'T DISAPPOINT (chapter 6 is gonna be an epilogue)!!!!!!! AUGHHH this isnt even a good review im just yelling but yeah this is really good and also pretty much everything else by this author, i'll say it now so this list doesn't have numerous fics by the same person just do yourself a favor and read through what she's got if you haven't already
rated T, 5/6 chapters, currently 14k words
(edit: completed!)
With Kid Gloves by crownofrosegold on ao3
4 words: Mr Darcy Hand Flex
rated G, 1/2 chapters, currently 2.5k words
(edit: completed!)
the most yearning, pining, longing fic ever with the least physical touch ever. loid traces yor's gloves in his pocket with his thumb and its somehow intimate. yeah
it's been a hot minute since it's updated but the first chap can kinda be read as a standalone (to me) which is why i rec, even though i personally only go after finished fics for my own sanity :^) also its just too darn cute how can i not
How to Be a Supportive Husband by @nemaliwrites
rated T, 1/1 chapters, 910 words
short and sweet drabble of the most simpiest loid post reveal. what more could you want
MISSION: Bottom Feeder by SilverSupa on ao3
rated T, 2/4 chapters, currently 9.5k words
this one is just too good and funny LMAOO yor and loid are Peak Stupid and also Peak Attracted To Each Other so it's just. mm good mix. this one's also been a hot second since it's last update but i love it too much so its on this list
even when we're not together (will you stay with me?) by JaMills on ao3
rated T, 1/1 chapters, 4.5k words
gosh this is another one of those super good reads that make you sit and think after you're done. soulmate AU where they swap bodies as children until they meet. personally i'm not the most dedicated reader of aus where yor and loid meet as kids, but the way its handled here is just so good and adds to the story. it's also part of a series and the next installment is equally as good. this is another one of those authors that has a lot of quality stuff (although there's a good dash of angst which i keep my distance from JKFHISDH) so look through their page!
Enough by Frotu on ao3
rated T, 1/1 chapters, 4k words
EHEHE THIS ONE HAS ME GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET FR it is soooo cute. typical thing of yors coworkers getting into her head, she asks loid if what they have is enough, and... well.... you can read what happens from there ;] (spoiler: it's very cute)
a dream in charmeuse by selfetish (@selfetishizing ) on ao3
rated T, 2/2 chapters, 12k words
oh gosh, the prose in this is just?? so insanely good??? its such a pretty read. this is twiyor, yes, but it's also a deep dive into femininity and yor's understanding/rediscovery of it. i remember the first time i read it the opening scene of the first chapter was just so GOOD to me, i was like OMG i am not gonna forget this this is so iconic AND IT IS!!!!! i love me a good yor centric fic. we usually get more of twilight contemplation (i mean he has got the whole mission thing going on and hes our resident overthinker so, understandable) but this was such a nice look into yor's..,, like, fundamental building blocks?? if that makes sense?? its just good ok read it
"The Five Times Loid Forger Went Topless In Front of His Wife and the One Time She Reciprocated" Or “Bare-Chested in Berlint” by Talik_Sanis on ao3
rated M, 6/6 chapters, 17.5k words
that title should tell you all you need to know right LMAOOO it's just yor being incredibly horny, like embarrassingly so. she lacks a grip
again this is just 8 fics, where my bookmarks list are over 200 (yeesh) so feel free to look through those. i've also got some fics, most of which are twiyor lmao (brainrot i told you). and don't forget to show these awesome authors some love!
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krchar · 1 month
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Some thoughts on Himerish and Trial of the Oracle
Ok so it's weird that I hardly post anything and now I go with this, but these thoughts are for some reason so pressing to me these days! And this feels like the right space.
tldr: i love 4th arc, I like Himerish's development, but after rereading last week I have some surprising ambivalence about how his warrior identity goes with his previously implied nature - or at least to my view of the character - happy to know anyone's thoughts on that!
Firstly I want to state that I love the stories, and mostly the first 4 arcs! This is just a thought on one character development...
So I belong among the fans of 4th arc, definitely, and I think that most people who have some soft spot for Himerish/Oracle, started to feel so throughout this arc (although I know some did before it was cool!). I always loved that story, that he was confronted with such a downfall, the dramatic almost mythical story of regaining his identity is so awesome, i liked that he cooperated with the guardians as a person, that he realized he was too removed from the world after all the time...
Last week I got this sudden fanfic inspiration (it's cringe, but I struggle to be creative for years, so my 7 pages are a huge cheery win!) and so I reread the story... and it's so great, but I have some odd feelings about some parts..
I think it is mostly about him being a warrior.
So. The first notion that felt off was in the issues from his coming to earth to the fight of Phobos + Cedric, when I suddenly felt like what is his almost never leaving resting bitchface? There are some really nice mentor moments, but most of the time he seems strangely annoyed without specific reason. Now in the previous arcs, he was not very popular, for he was indeed a terrible pr*ck, intentionally in arc 3, possibly intentionally in the previous ones ( but i don't know that, his behaviour always seemed to be somehow explained or something, even if the reader didnt have to buy it..) but what i did like was his serenity and at times his appearance of a lightness of heart that calmed everyone.. (that is, in moments when he wasn't a pr*ck) suddenly here Himerish is a dynamic warrior, always angry fighting etc etc - like he was serene and wise only because he was an oracle and it was his function, and not that he was chosen to be an oracle, because he was such in his nature in the first place, which i would like much better.
But! In the flashback with Endarno, that is, to my mind, exactly what Endarno implies! H. is a fighter in a war here and E. saves his life saying he senses a great power in H. and that he should act on it - then in the following flashbacks it's like H. went and became a cool martial arts master... and it just feels sort of... why...
(note: i presume that the flashbacks went in this order, bc E. calls Himerish "young asha (tribe name)")
my problem may be that I am not as much into warrior trope, as Im into powerful spiritual being trope... and also im probably too much of a hippie
But the first flashback actually looks like there would be more beyond! Endarno literally goes against his own commander, as H. is from the enemy tribe and is a captive to be executed. And it is said that E. already had doubts, even though he was a great warrior, bc his boss was very cruel, but it is meeting Himerish that gives him the final motivation to stand against the meaningless bloodshed! Implying that H. has definitely a hippie vibe... and H. also gives this impression, bc he's so serene and passive when they aim to kill him (although that may be some basiliadian feature dunno..) but.. then he goes to be just a better fighter.. like don't they have any other kind of spiritual power in Basiliade than becoming a cool warrior??
I mean, I liked Orube-Luba flashbacks very much, where Luba was the wise warrior mentor and it was cool. But we don't get anything like that with Himerish, right? He's just shown to have been really cool at fighting. Yarr is just really crazy about him as his former master, as if he was truly a different kind of being, but there is no word then about him being also a spiritual mentor.. maybe it is just not shown, but then - why not?
when i saw the first flashback, i sort of thought it would have been better, if H. was actually a hippie in his heart - maybe even against the custom of Basiliade. He said E. helped him a lot - so couldn't it be that this young guy who fights like everyone else does, then realizes he could just stop doing that and work out his inner spirit and power that has the nature of peace and connection, instead of fighting? I really really doubt that the Kandrakar council would have gone like - this guy is cool with sword, let's make him oracle. He must have had some other power before and I'm kind of sorry that they didn't work with it somehow... I'm also not so much into his warrior attire hehe
Now to go a full circle, I associate this type of wisdom actually with his nice and light-hearted mode and not so much with angry fighter mode.. he was angry before when something bad happened to Kandrakar, but that was different, then when he couldnt admit his mistakes, that was foreshadowing of his downfall, but his fighting mode was just so strange to me.. what's with the sword, do some magic and restore the peace of Kandrakar after your return, bc the peace and stability and light powers are your nature and not just your politcal function..
then again i admit that while i didn't like much what they did to his character in the following arcs, i could understand his departure.. so the described reason seemed like all his change was to nothing, for he again just didnt listen to anyone despite his former promises, but i could see another reason in line with arc 4, and that is actually his change, he became too human (or whatever species he is) and maybe it was even difficult for him to return to the position - bc this is literally shown at the end of arc 4 when he's contemplating before being reinstated.. and i like that.. cause im kinda very much into spiritual beings becoming human tropes.. or like generally emotionally repressed people rediscovering life..
Well, I get that some people really like warrior trope, so no hate, fandom is a free space yeah! Anyway, these were my thoughts, Im impressed you scrolled this deep, thank you! Tell me your thoughts on this pls Im happy to find more people to discuss witch to an unhealthy level! As a bonus, my two favourite memes/fanarts about H.'s earthly clothes:
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(source: https://tuherrus.tumblr.com/post/189587505767/oookay-heres-a-witch-art-dump-im-gonna)
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(source: https://www.deviantart.com/rukietta89/art/Shopping-with-Orube-97101177)
EDIT: ok i posted this like half an hour ago, but i got a sudden feeling that i was not entirely fair, so i want to say that i also feel that his conective and calming spirit shows up in those really nice mentor moments towards the guardians, although that doesn't go really against my original interpretation/headcanon - he was a confused young boy with a talent, now he's a mature, more steady guy with a talent, regaining understanding of life in 4th arc, which, ideally, would make him even more sensitive and calming, and that would be cool
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quitefair · 10 months
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so, about Ballister’s origin...
alright so i’m a huge, huge fan of the original nimona graphic novel. and i’m genuinely a fan of the movie too! it did make some significant changes, but overall told the story it wanted to tell, and pretty much summed up the themes of the novel itself! it was an enjoyable ride!
but!!! there was one bit of the story that didn’t quite sit right with me. and it took me a while to realise what that thing was. (i didn’t want to make a post ranting about it without properly processing what it was that made me dislike this, so i let it ruminate)
anyway, after seeing this post, everything fell into place.
instead of ballister being a commoner rising to become a knight...
what if he was born outside the wall instead? 
(major spoilers for the graphic novel and movie below)
so in the original comic, the knights of the institution were all orphans, including ballister and ambrosius. they grew up and trained together, and were both considered among the most skilled and prominent knights of the institution at the time. however, everything changed when they were pitted against each other in a jousting match. the director gave ambrosius a weaponised lance (similar to ballister’s sword in the movie). its weight threw ambrosius off balance and caused him to lose against ballister during the joust. in a fit of jealous rage over losing, he fires the lance at ballister, causing him to lose his right arm and ruining his chances of ever becoming a knight.
all of this is implied to have happened because the director wanted ambrosius to win the joust. perhaps because of the way he looked. white skin, blonde hair, all the ideal societal characteristics of a hero. nate mentions this in a recent article as well talking about the movie.
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while ballister... well. he didn’t. and now he also doesn’t have an arm. it was also implied that the director didn’t like that ambrosius and ballister were close, didn’t like that her perfect hero had a weakness, probably thought that ballister was not good enough for her poster child, idk. so yeah, she killed two birds with one stone. (except in this version no queens were harmed lmao)
the way they translated this into the movie was... well. interesting.
so now, gloreth has a bigger role in all of this. which is cool! it ties in so well with nimona being gloreth’s beast, and the entire reason that the city and the institution exists in the first place. this was actually one of my favourite changes to the comics that they made for the movie!!!
but! what i didn’t like was that our boys were no longer orphans. ambrosius is now the descendant of gloreth? which is why he’s the poster boy of the institution? and the one with the weight of familial expectation on him? 
(okay i lied this kinda slaps but it wasn’t explored as much as i’d liked. anyway wouldn’t it have been great if this was a limited series instead of a movie? lmao im going off track.)
but the weirdest part for me, and something i still felt difficult to accept, was that ballister... was a commoner. a commoner that was chosen to join the institution and to become a knight.
and it’s a controversial decision?
youre telling me that in this sci-fantasy world of super monster cops, that the only way people that can become a monster cop, is through nepotism????
and consider this: most of the commercial stuff aimed at kids, teens etc (kwispy dragon for example) sends the message that maybe, just maybe, you, the commonnest of commoner children, could also rise up and be a super monster cop hero?
there’s also the fact that in our current day and age, the story of the underdog gets the most attention and press? wouldn’t the crowds be ecstatic over a kid from nowhere, rising up among the ranks to become one of the most promising potential knights in this institution?
so yeah i dont really understand why the general population have gripes against ballister becoming a knight (it’s shown at the beginning during the whole montage that there’s some people who aren’t vibing with it) douchebag knights maybe yeah. but i don’t see how the general public wouldn’t be anything but supportive, and would turn on him so fast.
unless.... he wasn’t from the city itself.
you only really hear about the wall partly through the film. you’re shown that the city grows and that there’s a wall built around it during the intro cinematic, but nothing is mentioned until quite significantly through the film. which is odd... considering how important it is to the story. gloreth built the wall to keep the monsters out. to keep us in and to keep them out. the propaganda of there only being monsters outside the wall, and only good and respectable citizens live within the city walls.
(how does the wall keep us free? the wall keeps out the enemy. and we build the wall to keep us free, that’s why we build the wall, we build the wall to keep us free.)
which would make a ballister that came in from outside the wall... well.
1. it would make the director’s statement of ‘cracks in the wall’ make more sense. in a literal sense, ballister couldve come into the city from a literal crack in the wall. which also ties into the metaphor of gloreth’s walls/propaganda cracking. and the fact that he’s now rising up to become a knight? corruption from the inside? it makes the director’s motivations hold more weight.
(also having the director be a descendant of gloreth rather than ambrosius would make more narrative sense but that’s a whole other post)
2. now the public would have more reason to not trust this guy. it’s easier to spread propaganda about him once he ‘kills the queen’. a monster infiltrating the ranks. and then he’s allied with a monster shapeshifter nimona?
3. the parallels between ballister and nimona??? would be even more prevalent??? both literal outsiders. hated by everybody for basically no reason other than that they’re different. and the fact that ballister accepts nimona when gloreth didn’t?
4. there’s also the fact that throughout the movie, the concept of the wall protecting the people from the monsters outside is questioned - are there really even monsters outside, when we’ve never seen them for ourselves? what if you guys are lying to us, what if youre WRONG? and ballister becoming a knight might’ve been a step in the right direction towards pushing against those stereotypes, but the director wasn’t having any of it.
so yeah, those are my thoughts. the movie is still insane though i rly love it. but a lad can dream about what could’ve been, yeah?
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yb-cringe · 22 days
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im not a qsmper but i AM incredibly nosy and a jaiden of the animation variety fan. what is familioier, why is jaiden specifically being excluded, and WHAT suicide jokes are being made????
KFAKMD ok. lets take this step by step
1) familoier is the qsmp ‘family’ of roier bobby and jaiden. thats what it was originally (bobby is an egg child given to roier and jaiden its a long story)
this later came to involve cellbit as roier and cellbit got married (WAHOO) and before that vegetta as roiers dad and foolish as his? stepdad and leo as his sister.
2) its just misogyny. thats why shes excluded. like no one would ever admit that because they dont want to but to them ever since guapduo got married jaiden has been Nothing but Fun Side Character haha and not a major part of roiers life. not the literal mother of his child.
and also his best friend who was there for him for a major part of his life (post spreen betrayal- lile right off the cuff of that is when jaiden meets him). shes an extremely fuckin important person and CELLBIT makes a huge fucking point of this even
however literally like ever since the marriage happened people have been really quick to discount jaidens character entirely and exclude her from any discussions around familoier.
and at first the assumption is WELL what if its just bc shes not there a ton? interacting with them? and yet id say she interacted with roier more than vegetta and foolish yet somehow theyre always getting included in these aus and fics and art pieces because god forbid we forget the two extra men in this photo of an all male family, one of which hasnt been on in months
3) fjsjfn the suicide joke part is just to imply ‘if you keep doing x then im gonna kill myself’ was originally whag i was gonna say. but its like. ironic ‘no i onow thats bad so im gonna say something else to be less toxic’
anyway this was a huge EXTREMELY MESSY rant. tl;dr im just frustrated by people consistently ignoring jaidens involvement in roiers life and constantly backseating her for the more ‘interesting’ romance plot. like its just the quickest way to tell me you dont give a shit about aroace people, strong platonic relationships, or women just. at all.
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boatemlag · 4 months
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Hi I read your gift fic to Bee and I am soooooooooo wondering about the funerary rites of every empire pls tell me about them
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[ID: Ask from erstwhilesparrow that says, "[staggers out of ao3 shaking slightly] okay so obviously now i have to ask you for your thoughts on empires funerary practices!! stares at you with big pleading eyes. share thoughts?" /end ID]
HI!!!! im so glad you asked >:) a lot of this is in my brain but this was the initial note for the concept for the gift fic so you see where i'm coming from
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[Text ID: A screenshot of an iPhone notes app bullet point that says: "2. 2. mezalea and complicated system of rebirth and reincarnation-> no sense of grieving funerals? joel has never had to grieve because hes inorganic. clay structures dont die. interested in the connection between golems in judaism and clay constructs in mezalea" /end ID]
my basic concept with mezalea was ultimately that because constructs dont die (joel was made by the mother tree, and in turn made the mezaleans in his image? something like that) they cant properly die? and if they do die their friends and family or joel himself can reinstate them, and theres ritual for that, but its a thing that is ultimately for inorganics. and its not really akin to a funeral.
more under the cut, separated by nation! ones mentioned in the fic first!
mythland: for mythland i was inspired by this story i heard from a classmate of a funeral he attended in his father's hometown in china where they walked from the morgue to the cemetery and it took like multiple hours and they were singing funeral songs and prayers and such and then still had a ceremony at the cemetery. i had an image in my mind of the rain falling through the dark oak leaves and sausage dressed in the robes of a king even though he is so small (way too small for him) and the robes really are wearing him, and the hours upon hours of walking through the streets of mythland to the royal cemetery with hundreds of mythic citizens behind them singing mourning songs and the toll that takes on a boy too young to be king... yes. delicious. after the blood sheep religion is revived, these ceremonies involved ritual animal sacrifice.
gilded helianthia: i really like the idea of helianthians being people of the earth, and not having huge ceremonies for their funerals. people coming from the earth and going back to the earth. planting their favorite plants in their resting place. this one is pretty self explanatory i think? and its a very logical extension of helianthia's values. the bonfire is something i think is very common in surrounding areas of bordering nations.
pixandria: pixandria is, i think, the only canon depiction we have of funerals? its kind of obvious to say "The Vigil" but like. the Vigil. im also a big fan of the idea of something similar to an ofrenda being common, visiting the memorials of lost loved ones. i also think corpses dont preserve well in the desert so cremation is very common. the body is not considered very sacred and its the soul that has to be memorialized.
rivendell: i spend so much time thinking about these goddamn elves its not even FUNNYY!!!!!! religious schisms make me SICK!!!!!! in the head. anyway. i think cremation used to be very very common in rivendell because in the cold of the mountains bodies decompose very very slowly. but after the schism fire is considered weirdly sacrilegious when it comes to rituals, so they sort of have shirked the cremation part of the ritual. theyve always had wakes i think, and theyve replaced cremation with a complex catacomb type situation. elves also dont die super often? so there are centuries of elves buried beneath the mountains but its not like. that many. comparatively. elves consider it important to see the corpses of their loved ones as part of the grieving process and its an egregious crime to desecrate a corpse or modify the body in any way, even back in the days of cremation.
cod empire/codlands: funerals are VERY important in codish culture because the swamp conditions mean uhhh bog bodies are very possible. and thats considered sacrilegious because the only preserved body allowed is the cod head lmao. its a religious symbol as well as a theocratic symbol. that being said, there are a plethora of ways cod folk prefer to care for their dead. for those who are closer in heritage to oceanic peoples, its very common to feed corpses to fish (livestock) and hold a ceremony during then. for those with mythic heritage (before the ravine and erection of the walls of codlands and mythland) funeral processions were very common, though usually taken out to sea. these are just a few of the types of funerary ceremonies the codfolk use.
ocean empire: as mentioned in the previous section, oceanic rituals often involve feeding bodies to the fishy livestock as a funeral ritual. other than that, more land-living oceanic citizens do something akin to a "viking funeral" where flaming rafts are sent out to sea
lost empire: heh. so theres two main things here: pre and post xornoth. the folks of the lost empire used to bury their dead in large clearings dedicated as cemeteries. for more important people in society they constructed tombs all connected by underground tunnels. post-xornoth, cremation was added as a common custom. this was obviously short lived for the empire.
house blossom/the overgrown: similar to gilded helianthia, except instead of the land around, citizens are buried with seeds on their being, to be used as nutrients for the large wild flowers. post burial rituals include several days of merriment and mourning, and i like the idea that bonfires are also common here.
the grimlands: i really like the idea of public burial in the fields outside of the main capital of the grimlands. there are pretty large cemeteries that are multilayered. the tradition has a common ancestor with the lost empire's tradition.
crystal cliffs: I REALLY LIKE THE IDEA OF LIKE. magic being involved in some way. perhaps the crystallization of famous witches and wizards and sorcerers immortalized in amethyst, deep beneath the mountains. because the crystal cliffs is run by the headmaster or headmistress at the time i think the general burial rights actually depend on the nation of origin or wishes of the individual. crystal cliffs is very much a nation of various peoples because anyone can attend.
the undergrove: the burial rights of the gnomes is a dying secret. because there are very few gnomes left, the decimation of the population has erased former traditions in the face of cremation to eliminate chance of Corruption. it used to be something else, but that knowledge is lost to time.
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jack-kellys · 1 year
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west end question: i obviously love my brooklyn girls and would die for them all, but is it bad that it’s taken away the sprace dynamic for me? like i’m still 100% on board with a nowhere near canon ship and it shouldn’t affect me they’ve decided to have spot be a girl, but it lowkey has? and i feel kinda guilty about it? idk i love my proshot boys. but i am 100% here for all the uk newsies cast they are amazing and so talented and it’s definitely my favourite production by far!! idk if i’m making sense
ok part of me feels a litle baited actually because like. i feel like... im vocal abt mlm musical sprace not being a big vibe for me in the first place. so im a funny person to ask if you were looking for relief lmao. anyway here's my thesis below.
wait also if ur a white newsie fan a read-thru+rb of this would be much appreciated thank youuu (also yall have been eating up my character analyses anyway sooooo!)
TL;DR THESIS: if you're feeling genuinely let down that your ship did not see the light of day and a black girlsie spot conlon got to instead, then yes, you should reevaluate that.
followers, if you've been with me long enough, you know that i have quite strong opinions about how this show gets treated when it comes to interpretations and fandom/fanon. mostly, this is because i literally work in theater, and it's extremely backwards in my brain personally when shows get treated more like a movie or tv show than a performance piece.
im also one of the only ppl in this fandom that ever seems to dare speak on race (not the damn character smh). and anon, buddy, kiddo, this does have to do with race, gender, and sexuality.
firstly, what i think needs to be understood about newsies, is that it is theater, which means it is meant to be mutable. there is no one way. there should never be one way. it does not exist. secondly, theater does not exist in a fandom vacuum. its live every night, conceptually. theater is a live performance art.
interpretations change- it's the nature of theater. so i think asks like these really do illuminate the difference between fans of the show's content or fans of... i guess the show's culture's content.
this is a culture content ask.
one thing i really, truly, deeply need you all to understand: from an objective, script- and staging-based perspective, proshot sprace does not exist. they do not speak. they barely see each other. race does not even volunteer to go to brooklyn. the ship originates from the 1992 movie, where they do actually interact, which is why the ship has prevailed through the 90s to today. they're from the movie, not the musical.
of course, this doesn't bash the ship- it has history, and naturally fans want to create new history when they get a new source material (the musical). it's true for like every newsie ship lowkey (but also not lowkey because all the manhattan newsies do interact and sprace literally does not but thats a different post!!), which is something i do admire about the fandom- we do a lot of our own legwork here, we invent relationships and backgrounds from one-liners that could be given to tbh any frickin newsie. i respect the 30 years we have invented ships.
however.
when a huge, publicized, consistently sold out production comes along with spot conlon as not only a woman, but a woman of color (specifically black rn!) as the leader of the most feared group on stage, there becomes something much more important than a "sprace dynamic", which does not canonically exist in the musical anyway bro. you can't miss something that isn't there imo. often the story and casting within a story comes first, and goddamn if this isn't one of those times. lillie-pearl's spot brings bravado, swagger, confidence, and intimidation that is literally....fine maybe i'm being personal but it is slash gen incredible to see in technically a period piece! a black woman in leadership with that kind of assuredness! in such a popular musical! how is that not– automatically surpassing an often obsessed-over (yes i am. hinting at something here, straight girl fans) mlm ship?
and while i'm on the topic of the over-obsessiveness of mlm musical sprace, let me talk about uksies sprace. because what's also wack abt this ask is that sprace is not a hopeless case in this production- it literally has about as much 'evidence' as the proshot imo!!!!!
i got to hop over to 2nd row brooklyn seating for act 2 so i saw once and for all really close up, right. there's a moment when race is upstage letting the newsies in/down from the stairs. spot comes down and she does, in fact, share a look with him. race gives spot a nod and she keeps moving.
and like im gonna see the show again (every day i am counting my mf blessings fr), so if i'm wrong or they don't do it every time i'll correct myself, but that's what i saw with my own dang eyes on saturday. they do acknowledge each other in uksies.
and since they do, i really like. i have to ask. what is bothersome/unpopular abt uksies sprace, other than oh idk.... its not white/white mlm with a twink/manly bf trope? why can't race still love who spot is as a character, this strong and fearless ruler of brooklyn, in uksies? because tbh josh's racer...nahhhh because. this is such a side note now but they'd be so good together oh jesus am i gonna ship uk sprace. and it's not like they're 'taking away' from a queer ship because a) you can headcanon spot as a queer girl and race being trans is consistently popular and b) newsies has ten billion gayass ships bro we've been eatin for literal decades.
anon, i'm sure you didn't mean harm by this ask. i'm sure, honestly, that a lot of fans are feeling the same way as you and weren't quite sure how to put it in words. but, i'm also not surprised you sent an ask like this on anonymous specifically.
should you feel guilty about it? i don't think guilt is the right word. but i believe you should think more about how newsies is not.....static. it does not exist in one form, and it never will. if you're feeling genuinely let down that your ship did not see the light of day and a black girlsie spot conlon got to instead, then yes, you should reevaluate that. in theater, you should always question why something impacted you the way it did- a major point of theater is to discuss and think about it when you leave! i know this because ive spent three years literally studying it, to back up my thesis credentials.
thank you for reading this, newsies fandom. i do honestly say all this with love, and i hope it made u think !! ♥️
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tallulah477 · 6 months
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LOL ty! im glad you think i could write JFJFFNND but nah i use a lot of run on sentences lmfao but i also have too many ideas that are in my head or on my notes app
but honestly the avatar universe is just so good on its own like i think u can make 28747373 fics out of the canon story like and still make more yk but i do love thinking of neteyam and loak in different aus like the royalty one 🤭 soon to be king neteyam whose bethrothed to another but loves his maid he known since childhood and plans to run away with her to a small cottage with a garden to sustain themselves
and prince loak doesnt reallt care for neteyams future wife (only cares abt training and finds her bratty) but as time passes when she goes to visit them he falls for her and her bitchy attitude (i imagine their relationship is all bark no bite)
and OMLLL loak who goes to visit her families nation/kingdom and as he's getting a tour of the place he can hear rumours from the knights or princes at the event later that night that theyve had sex with her and she was crazy shit like that
and then the first time they have sex he finds out shes a virgin and he would be just so SOFT with her and when she wants to ride him he says she just doesn't have too but shes like No I will then cue her getting the wind knocked out of her as she slowly inches further down on him and then he just takes over and fucks her from that position - he pulls her down to where theyre chest to chest and hes trying really hard to not go so fast bc its her first time but hes going crazy he gotta grip the sheets and lots of praise from loak saying shes being such a good girl for him and calling her his princess
im realizing i made their dynamics so 180 from eachother LMDAOKFJFNF
also i think yk whose who sending the messages based on the typing style but ill just do that emoji anon thing NFND
— 🤍
I swear it's like you read my mind because I was just going to make a post today asking if you wanted to be my first emoji anon lmao
Welcome 🤍 Anon!!!
I completely agree that on its own the Avatar universe is so huge and one of the most ideal worlds to write in. It's so unique and real - like firmly settled in what it is and how thought out/meticulously it was crafted. But there's also so much room for fans to take bits of it and put their own spin on it while still staying true to the overall world as a whole. Like the queue play thing: we know how they work and what they do for the most part, but we're able to be like "hmmm, I think it would feel AMAZING if we put it here (wink, wink)" and play with it and attach it to body parts that James Cameron would probably be horrified if he knew what we were trying to do to the sacred alien appendage 😂
Catch up on the story:
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five
Extra: One | Two
CW:// None
I can just imagine Lo'ak's reaction after Neteyam and his girl run away together and Lo'ak becomes the future king-to-be. He'd be so upset because his whole life he's been compared to his older brother and always in his shadow and Neteyam always got everything, but at least Lo'ak got to focus on training and eventually he would be able to settle down with someone that he gets to choose. But noooo, Neteyam gets everything he wants, including the girl he wants, and just left Lo'ak there to take over every responsibility that he just up and dropped.
Now Lo'ak has to take be betrothed to the girl Neteyam was supposed to be with and she's got an attitude problem even more than before Neteyam left. But can you blame her? Poor girl grew up in a society where men ruled everything and woman were looked at as things to be used or bargaining pieces. She knows what's said about her - the rumors that other people make up about her to put her down. God forbid we ever have a strong, independent woman with any sense of self confidence. And she thought she was getting lucky with Neteyam, maybe she finally found someone who would respect her and treat her well. But he never gives her a chance, prefers the company of a maid, and then runs away with her.
Her confidence would be absolutely shattered after that and then here comes her replacement prince, the king of attitude himself, also scorned by his older brother's actions. They both have walls up, both have issues they have to deal with - but when those walls finally come down? Hoooo boy. Magic ✨
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orionsangel86 · 6 months
Text
Welp. Okay I watched the last episode of ofmd.
To sum up my thoughts on this season I will say that whilst I enjoyed it and felt the love and passion and respect for its queer fanbase throughout, it didnt hit me the same way the first season did. It felt like maybe a little bit of that season 1 magic was missing and for that I very much blame Max's cutting off 2 episodes and slashing the budget. They had a lot of story they wanted to tell that would have worked so much better in 10 episodes.
I consider the last 3 episodes of season 1 some of the best TV I have seen in my life. From the use of The Chain in ep 8, through the dramatic highs and lows of eps 9 and 10 it was edge-of-your-seat drama and I was in awe at the creators that put it together. But one of the reasons why those 3 eps were so good is because the drama and the pivotal moments were given time to breath.
If those 3 eps were given the same lack of time and budget as season 2, no doubt they all would have been crammed into 1 episode and it would not have had the same impact.
If anything that last episode should have played out across two, with Izzy's death being the half way point and cliffhanger ending leading to a final battle and somewhat happy resolution.
I'm not mad at Izzy's death. If anyone was gonna die, it was gonna be him. His status as Blackbeards enabler and sometimes mentor is over. For Ed to truly be free, I think Izzy always had to go. From a storytelling perspective it makes perfect sense, even though I am sure a lot of fans are absolutely heartbroken about it.
Another casualty of the reduced screentime meant certain original cast members weren't given anywhere near the amount of screentime they should have had. I was expecting a lot more focus on Jim as they were basically the third lead of s1 due to them getting the same backstory as Ed and Stede. All of the crew appear to have had drastically reduced parts which does feel like a big loss to me.
Its funny actually, OFMD S2 suffered from the opposite problem to GOS2. OFMD had too much story to tell in a limited timeframe, GOS2 had very little story to tell outside of the flashbacks and probably too much time given to it. Both shows season 2s suffered from tremendously bad pacing issues.
Also, the one thing the final episode made so obvious to me, is the uncertainty of getting a s3 renewal. It is so clear in the way they tried to wrap things up in a happy bow as best they could, so that if they do get cancelled it leaves fans at least somewhat satisfied. I hate this though. I hate that studios are so fickle and ruthless that creators have to gamble with good quality writing and avoid cliffhangers because of asshole executives who dont actually care about the stories.
Because of the fast pacing, and the fear of cancellation, it felt more like a rush happy ending instead of a part way point in a bigger story, with important character development still to come. Perhaps I need more time to absorb the story in a full rewatch, but im not exactly itching for more at this point, whilst also not really being satisfied with what I got either. I wish we had left Ed and Stede in at least some minor peril, like have them captured and threatened with hanging but at least in a good place romantically, so that we can start speculating about what kind of escape plan they will come up with in season 3. Leaving them in a dilapidated old inn somewhere just felt wrong to me. Instead of ending the season with the stakes sky high (like season 1) it feels like they left season 2 with zero stakes at all, instead of at least a happy medium. At this point we should be turning to fanfiction and wondering what happens next, but instead I'm left thinking "okay then. That was good. What can I watch next?" I don't need to bury myself in fanfic and fanart to feed the hyperfixation this time around, and that is where I feel the most loss.
I'm sure others will have hugely different reactions to me though. Perhaps my expectations were too high? Perhaps my GO obsession just isn't leaving room for OFMD this time? But then again, I think if GOS2 hadn't ended the way it did, I wouldn't still be so obsessed with that either.
Sigh. I dunno. It was a good fun show and will no doubt still be hugely popular with devoted fans, but for me I just can't say it cast the same spell over me as it did last year.
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lostfracturess · 2 months
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helloo!!! just finished all the "symptoms and causes" chapters that are out and i want to say this story has me on a MASSIVE chokehold 😭😭😭😭😭 stumbled upon the recommendation and decided to give it a try, because i already saw the chapters under the tag, though i am not a huge fan of long ongoings with the y/n, but lord it was one of the best decisions here, i wish i read it earlier! I don't know even what to start with, so im sorry for this kinda chaos, i guess the first thing that really got me is the characters and the way you depict them!!! satoru is so fucking good here, you describe him in such a thoughtful and thorough manner it makes me smiling blushing giggling 😫😫😫😫 the characteristics of him, his actions, little details of him handling himself around... it's so subtle yet adds a lot of deep to the character! i like especially when you highlight the intensity of his stare in the various situations, i think it's really canon of him!! overall he has me on my knees 😞😞😞 and y/n??? GOSH THIS WOMAN! i understand satoru completely, she would've me wrapped around her finger as well. i like that she feels....real? like a total normal human being with flaws, she's neither perfect in every aspect nor she tries to be. i ADORE her strength and the way she collects herself in the difficult situations ("i have to be strong for them"), yet she's not kinda of a terminator and indeed is vulnerable. the chess game just had me thinking whether i want to be her or want to be with her (this option is closed but still-), it's just THIS good. pacing is also very nice!!!! i think that everything just perfect the way it is. and the setting??? you did a very good job at describing it, i really felt like i was there in these moments (though to be honest i half read the surgeries because of the terminology 😭😭😭😭😭), it's very good. also the thing i would like to point out is the surroundings of y/n, it's not only just her and satoru communicating, but a variety of other people, i like their friendship with yuta, maki and toge! suguru and satoru are also nice, their bond is strong for sure, I'm really glad they have such people in their lives (we do not talk about sukuna and gojo's parents...). and ALSO THE ANGST??? it's just so fucking good written, their emotions and feelings 😩😩😩😩 literally biting my pillow!!!!! overall, the story is magnificent and looking forward to the next chapter! sending you lots of inspiration!!!!
p.s. looked through your playlist as well, i think it's very nice! might i suggest you to listen to "don't blame me" by taylor swift, cause to my humble opinion it fits them perfectly 😫
thank you SO SO much for this incredibly thoughtful message! honestly, reading this was the best part of my day. it makes me so unbelievably happy that you gave symptoms and causes a chance, even tho you're not into long stories and ended up liking it! 😭
i'm so glad that you're connecting with the characters! i spend a lot of time trying to get into satoru's headspace, like messy, chaotic, but with a surprising amount of hidden vulnerability and a really genuine love. so glad you're catching all those nuances!!
and yes, the STARES! i think this man communicates with his stupidly handsome eyes 99% of the time. it just must be canon.
also so glad you like the reader persona in this story. i wanted to portray someone both strong and flawed, capable of taking charge yet never being immune to their own doubts. i've been nervous that people can't relate or see themselves in the story, so i'm very relieved to hear that! <3
also so happy to hear the chess scene landed well for you, this is one of my favorites!!!
moreover find it kinda funny that you just SKIP the surgery scenes because of the medical terminology, that i spend hours researching for haha. but i get you, it might be a bit much and boring...
thank you again for taking your precious time to write me this sweet message!! can't wait to share more of the story with you! & wishing you nothing but the best! 🥲🫶🫶
and i will definitely add, don't blame me! haven't been listening to taylor swift as much lately, even though i'm going to her concert this summer omg.
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