Hnnng I've always kinda wanted one of these, but I never wanted to order one online because I couldn't be sure of the quality. Then I happened to see this one in Walmart, of all places, and LOOK AT IT. I had to have it.

God it's weird the things this kink makes us find sexy 🤣

Not ace but wtf

Vanillas are always on smth tbh

something about someone saying, "I'b disgusding," just... melts my brain

thinking about… a hot butler who’s photic and sneezes every time he opens the blinds in the morning… you can always tell it’s almost time to get up because you can hear his sneezes getting closer down the hall. maybe he figured out your secret somehow and always angles his sneezes towards you in your room. maybe he makes sure the spray catches the morning sun streaming through the window. maybe he likes giving you a show for those few seconds every day. maybe one odd morning he builds up to a sneeze but it never comes and he mumbles a quiet, embarrassed apology before moving on to the next room. that’s all. thank you.

Lesbians with big noses if you can hear me please save us. Lesbians with big noses please. Lesbians with big noses save us with your sneezes

Not snz but just general whump

The idea of someone literally “waking up with a fever” is so sweet to me. Just imagine whumpee at their partners house, having a slight headache and a weird feeling in their throat, but thinking nothing of it, taking a nap with partner and blaming it on being tired. In a few hours, whumpee wakes up to partner placing a cold flannel to their forehead and whispering their name into their ear.

“Hey, you gotta wake up baby, you’re burning up. Why didn’t you tell me you weren’t feeling good?” In a hushed voice.

Whumpee lets their eyes close as partner feels their cheeks and embrace them again. They feel terrible, but maybe waking up sick was the perfect catalyst for the love and care they so desperately desired.

Caretaking that is casual. Caretaking that's domestic.

You're sick, but it's just a cold. You're exhausted and sleepy, but it's nothing too serious either, so there's no need to worry.

So you're on the couch, sipping tea, trying to read, ending up just lying there, huddled under your blanket, drowsy and halfway to sleep.

Meanwhile, your partner is sitting next to you, also reading. Or playing a video game while you are watching, blinking tiredly but happy to be entertained in this way.

Or it's your friends. They're chatting, talking about their days. Watching a film. All reading. Studying. Playing cards.

And you're just sort of... there. They ignore your sniffling, don't mind when you blow your nose. They don't think you're gross or annoying. Occasionally, somebody might walk by and absent-mindedly pet your head. Squeeze your shoulder. Without even really looking at you.

"You okay?", somebody says, half-amused, when you sneeze forcefully.

"Fine", you mumble, closing your eyes again.

"You want tea?", somebody asks, but it's just an afterthought. They were already on their way to get tea for themselves.

"You warm enough? Want my jumper?", somebody offers. But it's only because they just took it off since they felt too warm.

You're literally just... there. Like a pet. Still part of it even though you can't do much. And you're so happy to simply be around them, feel included. Know you are cared for even though the illness is not that bad. Know you are loved without having to do anything for it.

buildups that are so vocal + desperate that they almost sound like whimpering

sneezing while hiding but you’re a snzfucker pressed between two people allergic to dust. The one in front of you sneezing so strongly that it’s stirring up more dust, which sets off the person pressed against your back. And you’re really trying not to absolutely rut against the legs pressed up against you, but it’s such a tight space and you can’t help but seek more pressure….

eventually the one in front (who is far too loud) needs to stifle into your chest to muffle the sound. You can’t help it anymore- you’re practically sitting on the thigh of the person behind you and it’s all too easy to lean into it. Now you’re having trouble muffling sounds of your own.

the person behind you doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, both of them figure it out pretty quickly and don’t seem to mind multitasking being quiet and helping you ;)

in your pinned post you said you help with the more academic side of things. Can you help explain good sneeze spellings and descriptions please? I use the same two in most of my stuff and I want to give the OCs in my head specific sneezes. I know how they sound but I don’t know how to write it down if that makes sense. Please send help.

Of course! I’m not exactly the expert on that sort of thing, but I am more than willing to help you out, especially since I’ve totally been there — you would not believe how I used to spell my sneezes.

Here’s a short little cheat sheet that you can use…although, if you need more specific examples, feel free to send another ask!

Releases:

______’CHNX! — a harsh stifle

______’CHH! — a less harsh stifle or more “polite” sneeze

_______’ TSH! — not quite a stifle, but a more controlled release

______’CHNXIEW! — failed stifle

______’CHNX’iew! — successful stifle with a false ending

______’CH’HIEW! — cartoony, or just more dramatic sneeze

______’CHIEW! — slightly cuter, but can be a basic sneeze

______’SHIEW! — basic wet sneeze

______’PTSHIEW! — can be cute based on volume, but can be used as basic

______’CHOO! — basic big sneeze

______’CHUH! — unapologetic, big sneeze

______’CHHHIEW! — big, wet sneeze

Build-Ups:

HUP’______! — caught off guard

HTCH’______! — basic, but usually leads to a bigger or wetter sneeze

HETCH’_______! — take cover; big and wet sneeze is on the way

HA’_______! — the jeans of build-ups; can go with pretty much anything; can also allow for bigger flares of the nostrils

GAH’______! — really caught off guard, or really didn’t want to sneeze

HIH’_______! — quick build-up; usually used for quicker, smaller, or cuter sneezes, but not always

RAH/GRAH’______! — animalistic; I usually just reserve this for furry content or monsters

Also, experiment with what gets capitalized and what doesn’t. Quiet parts can be completely lowercase, and louder completely uppercase. For example:

h’tsh! sounds a lot quieter than H’TSH!

Based on what part you want to emphasize, you can also bold or italicize. For example:

H’tsh! focuses more on the build-up, while h’TSH! focuses more on the release.

There are also COUNTLESS combinations, including within the same category (e.g TSHIEW!), so I would recommend experimenting to find what you like to use! Everyone’s spellings are different, and it depends a lot on style, tone, and plain personal preference.

Also, this is all based on my personal experience. While I tried to make it as foundational as possible, it is still quite possible you’ll have sneeze spellings very different from mine and other writers. And that’s okay! Just keep writing what makes sense and feels good to you.

Don’t worry, this gets easier with practice, I promise!

(And hey, if you are a more…auditory learner, maybe I’ll make a wav showcasing these different types of sneezes.)

The night is dark and full of fevers 💀 (or what running a temperature above 39°C for several hours feels like: for all of those who are curious and into it xD)

Your scalp and skin feel overly sensitive ? It's like every sense is heightened and everything is too much, light, sound, everything.

The thirst. You'll feel like drinking every 15 minutes.

Sweat, sweat and more sweat- You'll be drenched by the end of it (I had to change my damn bedsheets 💀)

Your heart will be beating crazy fast and you'll be out of breath from just moving in bed (turns out that anime trope of a character gasping for air while running a fever is actually not too far from reality xD)

Did I mention sweating-

Needless to say your head feels like it might explode with every cough or sneeze

The body aches 💀 they're vile (even my hands hurt wtf xD)

Also something pretty crazy, your skin and body feel like they're on fire but you're still shivering (imagine getting goosebumps while feeling hot all over, it's definitely really weird)

Your stomach won't be very calm either, expect some discomfort

Your decision-making skills and overall brain functions are out of order (I couldn't think straight and had to ask my mom to repeat herself several times to make sure I understood what she meant xD also I cried because I dropped a tissue on the ground and couldn't pick it up 💀)

A man wakes up with a terrible cold, and his wife, who happens to have the fetish, is thrilled.

He calls into work while they're fucking doggy style, the gorgeous expanse of her back laid out before him. A soft moan escapes her throat.

“Shhh, sweetheart. I’b on the phode," he says teasingly, waiting for his boss to pick up. The risk of having an audience is a dangerous thrill that pushes them both closer towards the edge.

"Hey, boss. Idt’s mbe." Hopefully his boss takes the dizzy lust in his voice for grogginess instead. A prickling itch builds in his sinuses, and he's unable to cover - one hand busy with the phone and the other wrapped around his wife's hip.

“I don’t… hah… I don’t thigg I-iihh – huh’AEESSSH’UH!”  The thick sneeze explodes in front of him, showering his wife's back with wetness. “I dodn’t thigg I cadn cobme in today.”

“Nng!" His wife stifles a breathy moan as best she can. He leans forward to wrap his wide hand gently over her mouth, feeling her hot breath moist against his palm. The tempo of his thrusts quickens, his hips stuttering with need.

“I thigk I just dneed to stay in bed all d-day. Hih… hih’ZZIISHH’iue!" Another harsh, heavy sneeze sprays over her, settling cool on her skin.

As much fun as this is, he needs to end the call quickly. He can tell she's already so close she can barely stand it -

Okay I'm really into humiliation + contagion+ mess, so here's a lil scene.

B has come down with probably the worst headcold they've ever had. Definately the drippiest, every sneeze forcing out more snot from the red, swollen passages. They texted A requesting they pick up some more tissues on their way home, and thankfully A listened. When A came home B was in the middle of a fit or well trying to get it out. Holding a tissue to their nose to try and hide all the mess threatening to come out. The bed was covered in used tissues and the one in hand looked like it should've been tossed by now. A couldn't help but grin at this. Seeing the poor thing with tears in their eyes, gasping desperately, their body shivering from not only chills but the need to sneeze! "aaaw my my my, look at you, seems like you really did catch the worst of it, my love." A smirked sliding beside them on the bed with a fresh box of tissues. B sighed as the sneeze fades away again though their face blushed brighter than what the fever gave them. They started sniffling trying to keep back the flood of mess which A caught onto. "You sound rather stuffy, honey, why don't I help you." Opening the box A pulled up a tissue, using their other hand to lower the one B had pressed to their nose. When they did this this had all the snot leaking back down. A then held the tissue just under their nose to catch what was dripping. "Oh look at that poor nose of yours, so drippy and red, it looks so angry too. One sneeze and I think its going to be more than a little mess." B kept trying to sniffle and snort the long thick cords back up, A wrapped and arm around then and gave them soft encouragements. "thats it love, try and sniffles all that back in" "you can do it" "oh there's so much, I'll help you keep it in okay. Just keep going" sdff sdfff sddrrrrck sdck! Finally all of it just barely managed to go back inside. A tilted B's face to make sure. seeing just how full their nose really was. All that snot was blocking B up badly. The nostrils flared widely trying to push the slimy stuff back out, but B did their best to keep it in. "there you go, love. See isn't that better, you did so good sniffling all that snot back in. Should I take away the tissue now?" B shook their head and used their hand to keep A's up at their nose. A soft hitching sound came, A could feel their breathes against their palm even through the tissue. A knew what would happen next, and decided to tease B. "aw is your nose tickling, I bet all that sniffling is making you feel sneezy huh? You don't wanna make a big mess do you? It'd get all over you and that pretty face of yours." B whimpered a little at this blushing harder, they tried to keep a handle on it but. Soon A started to use the tissue to rub a their septum and the tip of their nose. Feeling the soft cloth making teasing circles and rubs at the sensitive and raw skin of their nose. B's mouth dropped right open, their hitches growing desperate as were their sniffles. A could feel the snot beginning to leak out and onto the tissue in their hand, practically pouring out.

"oh it must be so tickly, darling sniffling back all that snot, feeling it drag against the inside of your nose aaaw. I bet its almost unbearable for you, and I know this cold has you sensitive." without a second longer B gasps and sneezed, and sneezed, and sneezed. The sneezes were just a forceful as they were desperate. Their nose doing all it could to get this nasty cold out. Snot soaked the tissue with in the first three sneezes, the next absolutely obliterated it leaving A's palm drenched in spray and snot.

When the fit slowed to a stop, B's nose was trembling, anything could set it off now and it looked like it needed to blow badly. Luckily they had A there to get them through it.

"oh look at the mess you've made darling, you're getting that cold of yours everywhere~"

(intentional contagion ahead)...

A has the fetish... and a cold. as much as they'd love to see their partner (B) with the same cold, they take their precautions. they're careful to direct each sneeze away from B, to muffle their harsh, spraying sneezes into a handful of tissues, to use copious amounts of hand sanitizer.

B knows about the fetish. they insist that they wouldn't mind catching A's cold, if it would make A happy. but A, not quite believing that B would really be okay with catching such a terrible head cold, laughs and dismisses them

as the day goes on, it becomes more and more obvious that A's cold is shaping up to be awful. A's nose is running profusely, their nose tickling incessantly, and they find themselves constantly interrupted with harsh, throat scraping sneezes

it's the first day of their cold, so it must be one of the most contagious. they instruct B to keep their distance, continue to politely deny B of their cold. both of them know how hot A would find it if B were to catch this, but A is too embarrassed to do anything about it

that is, until... B has finally had enough.

"whadt are you—" A asks, but they're interrupted by B, cupping a hand around A's cheek and leaning in for a deep, indulgent kiss.

"wait," A says, panting against B's lips. "you should m-move." they attempt to twist away, their chest rising with the sneeze they're fighting to keep contained. "I... hahhh... deed to... hhHAAH..."

B just kisses them harder, unwilling to move out of the way. A has no option to turn away, no option to do anything other than let the sneezes out...

"HhHH'aZssSCHhHEEW! HEHH'EETSHH-yYUE! hh... hahh... hAHH... HHAHH'ASSCHHUe!!"

...right in front of them, drenching B's face with contagious spray, as B continues to kiss them, utterly unbothered... maybe even more fervently than before.

"w-wait," A says, gasping for breath. their nose is starting to run again. "what are you doing?! you'll cadtch my cold... HAHh... hAHH'IIIIITSSSCHHUUE!!" the sneeze comes with barely any warning, showering B with glistening spray. "hHEH... HEHH... HEHH'EETSSHHH-IIYYEW!! ahhH'TTSHHhhiIII!EEEW!!"

"if you want to convince me to stop kissing you, you'll have to work harder," B says, leaning into the kiss again.

despite themselves, A feels warmth settle just below their stomach at the thought of what consequences B might face for kissing them like this, just as their breath begins to hitch and hitch...

someone commenting on how much their partner is sneezing will always always always be my weakness

“bless you! what’s that, the fifth time now?”

“oh, hon, you just can’t stop, can you?”

“god, you’re just so sneezy today”

always perfect <3