#if i had the money i’d go private because i’m so fucking sick of this
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WIBTA for trying to get my disabled coworker fired?
I know it sounds bad which is exactly why I’m asking. Please give it a read-through before voting though.
I (18M) work a food service job. One of my coworkers, L (20sF), is deaf, which can make working with her harder than other coworkers. I don’t mind this, and have taught myself some ASL to communicate with her when phones aren’t available.
However, in my half a year of working here, I’ve noticed that she has bad habits compared to every other coworker I have. For example, L comes in late nearly every day. I wouldn’t mind it if it was only by a few minutes, but she regularly comes in over 20 minutes late, and on occasion, being over 40 minutes late. Being the only other person who works mornings in my position, this makes my job harder because I have no clue when I’ll have someone to help me. It’s especially bad during morning rushes, in which I have to do almost everything by myself.
She regularly lies in order to get off as well. At one point, she told everyone in the store she was sick. We let her go for the day, but 30 minutes after she left, she posted about going to a party on her Facebook account. There are other incidents, but this is one of the clearer ones.
There have also been incidents in which she messes up food. Bad. At one point, she poisoned a customer by putting something they were allergic to in their order. It wasn’t even a thing that normally came on the food, so I couldn’t chalk it up to a really unfortunate mistake.
When L does prep work, her stuff usually turns out super poorly as well. With the dough she makes, it’s always so thin that someone has to go back and add flour to it. With the in house sweet cream we make, it’s always unmixed at the bottom. And just a few days ago, the chicken salad she made turned out fucking pink. A coworker got sick giving it the benefit of the doubt and trying some.
L’s also, frankly, really unpleasant to be around. She’s incredibly bossy, which is rich for how lazy she can be. If you’re around her when there’s nothing going on, you’ll hearing about all of her personal drama. Complete with private messages between her and her boyfriend of the week, messages with her doctor with way to much detail about her sex life, and at one point, photos of a dead dog she had run over that morning. All completely unprompted.
She’s also been hitting on me and another coworker recently. I have repeatedly stated I have no interest in romance in general, and the other coworker is taken.
L continues to do these things, despite everyone telling her otherwise. Even when the manager or boss get onto her, she’ll only change for a bit and then go back to her old habits.
The reason I’m asking if I’d be the asshole is because I know it’s hard to get a job while disabled in this country. And L’s been at this job for 3 years somehow. I know that doesn’t excuse a lot of things, but I still have trouble knowing that someone could be going without money they need.
There’s so much more I could get into here, but I already fear that this is too much.
So TLDR: I’m considering pushing for my deaf coworker to get fired because she regularly shows up really late, endangers customers, and makes everyone uncomfortable.
What are these acronyms?
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No Questions Asked (Laszlo Kreizler x reader) Chapter 7
No Questions Asked tag list: @fandom-lover-4, @ajeff855, @booksarekindaneat, @greeneyedblondie44
Everything tag list: @greenrevolutionary, @byebyebreezywrites, @spngingerbread21, @layazul, @lov3vivian, @simonsbluee
You didn’t know what time it was when you finally staggered back to your place but you knew it was early in the morning. You paused as you saw a faint light flickering in your grubby window and sighed heavily. You had been hoping that you wouldn’t have to deal with any late night patients but you were never that lucky. You pushed the door open with a grimace and a familiar voice said,
“That you Doc?”
Polly.
You let out the breath you had been holding and softly closed the door behind you. Polly sat up in your bed and grinned at you while you gave her an unimpressed look.
“You’re here late,” you said, “Need anything?”
“Just some decent company.”
“Then you came to the wrong place.”
As you approached her you winced when you saw her face. You sat down on the edge of the mattress and Polly moved so she was sitting next to you.
“Thought I told you not to go out.” You said
“And I thought you know that I have to work. If I don’t-“
Polly stopped talking and an uncomfortable silence lapsed over the two of you.
“Why do you do it?” Polly asked eventually
“Do what?”
“This.”
“Because some people have no one,” you replied, looking at the floor, “Everyone deserves a chance to live.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“I don’t understand-“
“Don’t play thick,” Polly interrupted, “It doesn’t fucking suit you. You know what I mean. Dressing up like a bloke.”
“Shh,” you glared at her, “Keep your voice down. Don’t want everyone to know.”
You hopped off the bed and hugged yourself tightly as you paced up and down your room.
“Thought the answer should be obvious,” you said at last, “Because women aren’t taken seriously. What opportunities are there for us? None. I want to help people but people won’t go to me for help.”
“I’d still go to you,” said Polly, “Lot of us working girls would.”
“You might want to but would you be allowed to.”
“That’s not fair,” Polly, “We don’t have a choice.”
“You implying I do?”
“More so than us.”
“Why?”
“Because,” Polly waved a hand at you and you smiled as realisation dawned, “Oh because you’re taken seriously like that.”
“Well, most of the time.”
“Aren’t you sick of it?”
“Gotten used to it by now,” you raised a hand and grimaced when you felt your hair, “Could do with getting my hair cut though.”
“Should let me do it.”
“Thanks Pol.”
“Don’t mention it. So, is that why you’re helping them?”
“Helping who?”
“Those posh blokes who came in the other day. Helping them out of the goodness of your heart.”
“Who says I’m helping them?”
“Just got that look in your eye, Doc.”
“Just between us?”
“’course.”
“I’m providing knowledge because of one thing only.”
“Yeah?”
“Money.”
“So if they weren’t rich you wouldn’t be doing this?”
“’course not! Still need money to live.”
You sat down on the bed next to Polly who rested her head on your shoulder.
“Y/n, promise me one thing.”
You glanced at Polly curiously. She hardly ever used your real name even in private. She was too afraid of slipping up in front of the wrong people.
“Yeah?”
“Be careful.”
“Always am Pol. I always am.”
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personal post!
hey hi I’m alive sorry for abandoning my blog for like 1.5 yrs??? I had a bunch of health issues and mental health stuff too :’)
Like very full on... god what HASN’T happened.
My body had a weird reaction to the covid vaccines in 2021? I ended up in hospital etc and was sick with mystery fatigue and shit for months and months.... I think I went to hospital like 4-5 throughout 2021? My body seems fine with the MRNA boosters I’ve gotten so maybe something in my body just hated the astrazeneca vaccine?? I’m kinda bitter about it bc of the ambulance bills I had to pay, but still, thank god for vaccines amirite
then, the apartment I was living in and loved got bought by someone who then wanted to move in, so I had to leave the place I loved living to somewhere still nice but way more expenno, and my health issues kinda continued?
then I started a new job
then my mental health got REALLY bad over the 2021/2022 christmas period to the point where I had to call an ambulance for myself bc my mind was in such a bad place.
Then I started taking SSRI’s for depression/anxiety, but I had this weird reaction to the drugs and we think I had serotonin syndrome because of its interaction with the asthma meds I’ve been taking all my life? But at the time no doctors would listen to me and basically gaslit me into thinking all the pain was just a physical manifestation of my anxiety. Anyway, it caused some of the most horrific pain i’ve ever experienced in my life, in particular nerve and muscle pain in my legs, and I had to shower sitting down for weeks, couldn’t walk much around the house, and needed super strong meds to knock me out so I could sleep.
I slowly healed and could walk again and do normal stuff for me around... late April?
While I was recovering I stayed with my mum but still paying rent in Sydney bc all my shit was there, so in June I killed my lease, put most of my shit into storage with a friend’s parent’s mini warehouse they use for their business (absolute legends and wholesome humans and I sent them money every month lol) and moved back home.
I started studying a certificate level course I’d been wanting to get over and done with for ages, so at the end of June I started studying.
Then once again mental health got bad, I tried SSRIs again, thinking it was me who was the problem last time I took them. BUT ACTUALLY, NO. Same physical reaction to the meds as last time, if not worse. It wasn’t my brain making shit up, it was an actual fucking drug interaction issue that ppl had tried to tell me was my anxiety and/or imagination!!! Queue horrific pain, weird symptoms, and once again the inability to walk or clean or work from anywhere but the couch.
Dr and I decided any meds that effect my serotonin levels are a no-go probably forever, and so I’ve been looking into CBD oil over the past few months to see if that will work for things instead.
Now I’m about... 2 months from that reaction, and started CBD oil 2 weeks ago (no reaction, side effects, or really anything yet) and can work at my desk as long as I have a big ass XL foot rest under my legs to keep them propped up, because I get nerve pain if I sit normally :’) I still can’t really go anywhere or walk anywhere other than around the house and for super short periods of time.
Also I powered through and finished my course just last week, so that’s out of the way at least!
Other than that, I’ve just been like. Sleeping, reading, watching shows, napping, sleeping more, trying to eat well.... my job is a bitch but I’m trying rly hard to skill up so I can do more of what I’m interested in! I kind of don’t have energy for much else at the moment??
I have no idea if I’ll post again as regularly as I did a few years back, but I love Tumblr and I always feel glad coming back here and spending time in this place for a bit. These days I mainly only post stuff on my locked private twitter lol. But I have always preferred Tumblr’s longer format and vibes hehe.
ANyway that’s all for now! I hope anyone reading this has been doing ok. These past few years have been fucking tough and if all you have energy for is working and sleeping... you’re valid, dude.
And if you plan to take SSRIs for your mental health, just be wary of serotonin syndrome!!!! Not enough ppl talk about it and a lot of doctors seem to have no idea it exists or also know little about it, but there are lots of cases of it in settings where ppl have been taking other meds and been given SSRIs! I’m not saying don’t take meds if you need them, but just reaaaallllyyy do your research first if you can about adverse reactions and interactions :’)
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Anthony’s Stupid Daily Blog (372): Fri 24th Mar 2023
Weirdly even though I didn’t go to bed until 12:30 last night when I awoke at 6 for work I felt fully replenished and energised which hasn’t happened in a while. For the first time since my bike fucked I resisted the urge to get a taxi and just went for the bus. I asked the driver for a day ticket and he mumbled something without giving my the ticket so I had to take my headphones out to hear what he was on about which annoyed me because it should have been a straightforward transaction like every other time I’ve gotten on a bus. He asked me where I was going and I told him Concord bus station and he gave me a ticket. I spent the rest of the journey wondering why the fuck he’d asked me where I was going as I’d asked for a day ticket. A day ticket allows you to get on the number 56 bus as many times as I want for a 24 hour period so where I’m going is irrelevant. It appears as though since I got my motorbike the employees of the bus company have gotten even more fucking stupid. Speaking of useless my phone was at 80% and suddenly while I was listening to a podcast on the bus it decided to just turn itself off. So I switched it back on…battery life 10%. BULL….SHIT!I’m sick to death of this piece of shit doing whatever the fuck it wants like it’s Marlon Brando on the set of Apocalypse Now. As soon as I get back from the States I’m getting a new one.
I saw on the news that protesters in Paris have caused a full on riot in opposition to the pension age being increased. We can’t we get our shit together like the French and fuck shit up when the politicians screw us over? Iain Duncan Smith brought in non-doctors to order severely disabled people back into work against doctors orders. Why the hell didn’t we match to his house and permanently tar and feather the bald cunt like the end of the movie Freaks? I’m convinced w that when Smith was a kid on his way to private school a disabled kid in a wheelchair accidentally ran over his foot and scuffed his shoes which led to a lifelong vendetta against the disabled people. I wouldn’t be surprised if Smith has a “lair” in his house with posters and effigies of all the disabled people he hates: Stephen Hawking, the drummer from Def Leppard, Rylan (I’m not sure what he’s got but whatever it is he’s got it bad).
I got a statement from my bank and It turns out that I had more money left in my account than I thought I would after taking out a grand for the States. I assumed that it would be completely drained after all the money I took out to spend plus all the cash I’ve spent on taxis and food this week but there’s still a decent amount of cash in there. Plus I of course will be getting paid my regular wage while I’m on holiday too so at least I won’t be flat broke again when I get back.
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Brett Thoughts
I am keytaryourheart so it is time for some key talk. Not Tim Key.. the keyTAR.
I haven’t been blogging about BD lately even tho this technically started as a BD blog. Also my latest hyperfixations have been absolutely bonkers so BD as been put on the back burner so to speak.
So I’m gonna start by recapping the releases of late last year and maybe a little bit of the TikToks.
I’m a Werewolf (Unfortunately)
Solid. I haven’t listened to it much because ehhhhhh. Unfinished business will always be my #1 for halloween and Spook Me Up has the “Please feast on me” line which is CRAZY plus it had the keytar solo. I’m a Werewolf was a little too Tom Cardy for my liking and I do like Tom Cardy but this just didn’t really do it for me unfortunately. UNFORTUNATELY!
Everybody Needs to Know it’s Christmas
This was a revamp, remake, remix, rendition whatever whatever of the how to make a hit christmas song or something and I don’t know the exact name because I believe he’s PRIVATED IT! Goodness gracious. Anyway, the new version is really good so I get if he wants this to be the Final.Version.mp3. Although the original Pinocchio still very much holds up even with the 2020 version out. Oh well. The only thing I didn’t like about this 2022 version was the child choir. One of my biggest musical pet peeves. I just don’t get it. The figgy pudding line makes up for it though.
The Right Side of History
I like this. Like it’s good you know? Yeah.
TikTok has been interesting. He’s having fun, he’s getting views. Good for him.
NOW we can get onto the mother flipping Patreon.
Around 73 people expressed interest in subscribing to a Rob J Madin Patreon and apparently not all have followed through. I know there was a BDT Patreon a while back but that’s defunct.
So the Patreon will give you 1 new single everything month and this month it’s Lola (4-Letter-Word-Song) the sequel kinda to Bin Guy. It’s good. I like it a lot. I never thought I’d hear Brett say the phrase “hits diff” ever in my life. It’s a lot of fun and I got into it immediately. It go me really excited for all the BD stuff to come this year. I’m on the highest tier (I believe) but the first one is still really good and definitely worth it. I’m just a crazy fan which is why I’m forking out.
For the middle and high tier you get stuff from the archives. Which is pretty exciting given how much has been fucking archived LMAO. There are also some sick as discounts for Bandcamp and Vinyl. I’ve already bought mostly everything I want from Bandcamp so that’s not really useful to me. I also normally buy stuff for more than the minimum pay what you want anyway. I also already have the Keytar Your Heart Vinyl. Maybe I get one for playing and one for displaying. I’m only joshing that would be unwise.
The highest tier is the T-Shirt tier because guess what, you get a T-Shirt! Keep in mind you need to be in that tier for 3 months in order to be eligible to get the shirt. It’s got the Steamroller pineapple but with ROB J MADIN on the pineapple spikes. It looks like the pineapple is going to be the Patreon symbol which I totally dig I think it’s really nice.
I’ve just realised that the Bandcamp discount also extends to the merch. I highly highly highly recommend the Home Studio tote it is fucking massive, fits all of my shit and just looks so cool. I’m from Melbourne where we take totes very seriously and my god I secretly think I have the best one in the major metropolitan area.
So that’s it! That’s my spiel. I’m beyond estatic about this direction. I hope RJM gets what he was looking for out of this Patreon (lots of money) and we get some amazing lovely tunes spanning from Brett Domino all the way to Ironwood. Cheers RJM! Here’s to 2023 🍻
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flew back today we did wine tasting this morning and it was so interesting i wanna own my own vineyard in 20yrs so i loved learning about it plus i was the only one out of everyone who spoke passable french so the guy gave me a discount. my nan found loads of money in a hole behind her wardrobe and she gave me some so i’m gonna spend it on some french speaking lessons. i got back and my mum came to pick me up but i had to spend 20 mins listening to her argue with my stepdad on the phone because my sister is too sick to go on holiday and they don’t know what to do and by god do they know how to turn bad energy into demons and it was all on speaker and i’m finally like can u guys just have this convo in private i just got back from peacefulness i don’t wanna listen to this and he’s like nobody gives a fucking shit what you think and i pressed the button and hung up on him because why the fuck would i want to sit on the phone listening to that shit and then my mum goes off and she wants to leave him and blah blah blah and she’s trying to argue with me and i don’t engage and it makes her more mad and she’s shouting and i start crying because yeah i hate it when people shout at me and she tells me to pull myself together and stop being a fucking bitch and we have to go home and pretend everything is okay, but it’s okay i just really don’t know how to deal with it she calls me childish for not arguing with her and i love her to pieces but where is the empathy where is the love i think i’d actually have to be bleeding out on the floor for her to actually take my feelings into account my only job is to be quiet and hold the peace and be everyone’s therapist it’s so hard when i’m home i can’t be upset i can’t cry i have to be calm otherwise everybody else loses their minds. but if i’m the only one in control god help us because if he hits me again i don’t think i can keep on being this forgiving but i can’t leave my sisters but i need to escape but i need to be strong my mind gets so twisted god help me
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Fuck fake friends!!!
I’ve had this “best friend” for over 10 years. We’ve been good up to 2020. Covid happened and we obviously couldn’t see each other because I am a vulnerable person with several illnesses.
The last we actually saw each other was December 2019, which I understand fully because of covid and not wanting to get me really sick.
After that shit with the dude that was creepy and controlling in my last post here - ⬇️⬇️⬇️
I needed some help. Some support. I was and still am paranoid he will show up where I live, or he will use the things I told him privately and in confidence against me some how.
I thought I’d go to my best friend. I decided to ask him if he’d like to video call again. After we haven’t done it for a while, mainly because I’ve been too nervous (from not seeing each other for a long time).
We decided we’d Skype on Saturday, he was apparently busy and didn’t tell me or think to say he couldn’t do Saturday because of what he had planned. Otherwise I’d have said fair enough.
We then decided on Sunday, but thanks to my bowel condition that didn’t happen. I bought some Imodium on Amazon to be here today (Monday) so we could Skype tonight.
Then tonight I sent him a few messages, about my Imodium arriving so I’m ready to Skype tonight, and another to ask if he was still ok to Skype. No reply. Nothing. Not even to tell me that he was busy. I would have understood, and rescheduled it for another night.
But instead I was left waiting around. I waited until half 12. I had been waiting since half 10 at night. I realised he wasn’t going to make a show so I just turned off my game, put my IPad away and went to bed.
I’m now up again at 2 am because of no doubt stress and depression. And also because even though I take Imodium that barely works. Even though I didn’t even hardly eat today. But because of stress my stomach starts up. So thanks “friend” for making my stomach worse.
I can’t take anymore, I really can’t. I don’t know what I did. I must have done something to him. He could have at least told me he was busy, like I said I would have understood and rescheduled.
So now I only have 1 friend left, and wondering how long until she leaves…. Knew something would happen before my birthday. It happens every year. After this year I’m not having a birthday. It will definitely be cancelled. I can’t do that this year because my mums already spent money on birthday things, so I don’t want to waste her money.
I don’t know what to do anymore. Just lost. It’s like being back at school when everyone dropped me because I got kicked out of school due to being bullied a lot. Maybe I am just better off alone. Maybe this is a sign and it’s telling me that I should just be alone and that I’m meant to be alone.
#my thoughts#mental health#my vents#spotify#vent account#chronic illness#im a loser#my life is a disaster#this life fucking sucks#aesthetic#fake friends#fake people#pathetic loser#forever alone#meant to be alone#crying#lost#can’t do this anymore
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another day, another urge to storm the neurology office in my hometown and shoot them all
#rant#kt’s life#kt needs a diary#i hate doctors so much#they do not listen and i’m so tired of it#im sorry me asking to change my medication because i can’t function is inconvient to YOU#fucking cunts#tw: doctors#if i had the money i’d go private because i’m so fucking sick of this
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Runaway-Finn Shelby x Reader
(GIF credit to @dialnfornoir)
Masterlist
Summary: On her brisk walk home, (Y/N) witnesses a brutal Peaky Blinder attack, attempting to run away when Finn Shelby comes after her, only to sweep her off her feet.
Characters: Finn Shelby x Reader
Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name
(Y/L/N)=Your last name
Warnings: Violence, fighting, blood, fluff
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Come on (Y/N), not even one drink? We won't even make you stay, just the one!" my friend moaned as I denied their proposal of going to the Garrison.
"You said that last time, and I ended up staying until early hours." I laughed.
They all put their hands together as they started begging. I also laughed at this, embarrassed by the attention that was suddenly on us.
"No, seriously. I have to be good with money this month. Thanks to you lot, I'm having to be frugal for the rent."
They sighed."Fine, we won't make you come. But you will be missed. Just get home safe, OK?"
"I will. You too, please don't get too drunk and end up sleeping outside."
"That was one time!"
I shook my head as we giggled, waving goodbye when I turned to walk home. We had just finished work, so it was still relatively light out; I would say it was less dangerous to walk alone, but we did live in Small Heath. Yawning after the long, boring shift, I adjusted my coat around me, trying to keep warm. All I wanted was a good dinner, get cleaned up and snuggle into bed, maybe read a few chapters of the book I had if my eyelids could stay open. I was only in my early twenties and already feeling like an old woman.
Home wasn't far, a good twenty minute walk, which could be a bad thing if it was raining, a lovely stroll if not. I lived in the better part of Small Heath (if there even was one), walking home from work had never been an issue. Until I heard the unfamiliar sounds of desperate begging and crying, as well as thumps and slaps of skin of skin contact. My eyes widened, heart beat accelerating when I realised someone was begging for their life. There was no other way home for me, I had to take this route. What I should have done was turn around to join my friends for that drink, but the natural human tendency to be curious took over. As I cautiously continued my way home, I couldn't help but glance down the alleyway behind a row of houses, spotting four young boys surrounding an older man, who looked like he was being beaten to a pulp by one of them. I froze, having never seen a brawl like this up close. It was as if I were delayed, somehow taking ages to register that I had to leave before they spotted me.
Unfortunately one of their heads snapped up to look at me, tapping his friends on the shoulder, pointing at me as he shouted for them to stop. My legs still wouldn't move, staring at the man who's face was soaked red with his own blood. It wasn't until one of the young men started approaching me that I sprinted away, suddenly terrified about what could happen to me.
I cursed myself for being such a bad runner, as well as the shoes I was wearing. My lungs were working incredibly hard, my throat drying up whilst my mind panicked as it tried to remember which way was home. I let out a scream as the boy grabbed me, crying out in pain when they pushed me against the brick wall. Attempting to scramble out of their hold was useless, they were pushing their whole weight on me, I had no escape.
"(Y/N)?" he said my name.
My eyes widened, realising who had a hold of me. It was Finn Shelby.
"(Y/N) (Y/L/N)? We went to school together. You might not remember me, but we definitely did."
"Of course I remember you! You're Finn fucking Shelby.”
"Oh right."
"Please don't hurt me."
He looked confused."Hurt you? Why would I do that?"
"Well, you're currently pinning me against a wall, and I'm finding it a bit hard to breathe if I'm honest."
He glanced down, quickly pushing himself away from me. I tried to hide getting my breath back, letting out a quick cough. It seemed he wasn't going to hurt me, and he wasn't being sadistic about that phrase either.
"I'm sorry. You alright?"
I slowly nodded, still wanting to be on the safe side.
"I remember you from school. Obviously changed a lot, though I have seen you from time to time."
"Right."
"Look, uh, what you saw back there, I need you to forget it."
"Finn," I was scared to say his name but I did anyway,"you almost killed him."
"You know I'm a Peaky Blinder, right?"
"How could I not? And are you trying to justify what you did?"
"(Y/N), he ran a brothel using children."
"Oh."
"I mean, you couldn't have known that, so I can see how that looks from a different perspective."
"Well, I totally agree with your actions then."
"I still need you to keep quiet about the whole thing."
"Um, of course."
"Where were you headed?"
This was the longest conversation I had ever had with Finn, with a Peaky Blinder. I briefly remember him as a child, you never do have specific memories at such a young age, though I probably played with him during break time.
"Home."
"Let me walk you."
"No, honestly it's fine, it's not far."
"I insist. Part of my apology for scaring you earlier."
"Part of your apology?"
"Yeah, I'm taking you out for drinks tomorrow."
I started thinking I might have been in a dream."Sorry?"
"Do you always act this surprised at what people say? A catch up drink."
"That's alright, really, if you're trying to make it up to me-"
"Come on, just one?"
It was like deja vu.
"If you're busy tomorrow, we can always go tonight. Yeah, you know what? Let's do that instead!"
"No, Finn, really I'm fine."
"I won't take no. Please, it'll be nice, I promise all I'm asking for is a drink."
I felt obligated to go, still in a bit of shock from what happened. But my friends were at the Garrison, if they saw me with Finn they would think I was ditching them, and what would it look like for me to be walking in with a Shelby?! However, I felt bad when I saw how happy Finn was; and even if he tried anything later I would undoubtedly slap him, I wasn't afraid of that (I tried to convince myself). When I agreed, his smile grew even bigger, instantly heading towards the pub.
I was trying to focus on what he was babbling on about, only my mind was preoccupied with the dreaded stares of my friends. That was one fo the worst things you could do as a girl, ditch your friends for a boy. Then there would be questions about how I met him, why didn't I tell them, why didn't I bring him along to drinks etc. I'd look like any other desperate girl that tried to cling onto the arm of any Shelby, desperate for a taste of the dangerous, gangsta life, even if it was just for one night.
As we walked in, I felt sick, immediately spotting my friends on their usual table they always tried to grab. They hadn't seen me yet, so I attempted to hide behind Finn, keeping my head down as we stood at the bar.
Finn was served first before anyone else."Whiskey Harry, and you?"
"Um, wine please."
"Just put them through the window, yeah?"
I was confused when we walked to the private room, it felt like I was trespassing. Though this gave me a good hiding place from my friends, chancing to glance back at them before disappearing. They still hadn't seen me.
Finn casually sat down, looking relaxed. I stood, not sure whether to join him, which was a stupid thing to think when he had invited me.
"Are you going to stand there the whole time?" he chuckled.
I said nothing as I sat down opposite him, not wanting to become trapped in the booth with him. I still wasn't sure what to say once seated, hating that this could become awkward at any second.
"Are you OK? You seem a bit shaken up still." he asked.
"I'm fine." I squeaked out, knowing he could see right through me.
"You're all nervous, what's wrong?" he smirked.
I sighed."My friends are out there."
"Oh, well go tell them to join us."
"No!" I snapped too quickly."Look, I said no to drinks earlier, hence why I was on my way home, and I was scared what they would think or feel if they saw me waltz in with you."
"Don't want to be seen with a Blinder?"
"No, just didn't want them to think I chose a boy over my friends."
He gave me a pointed look.
"And I guess it would seem strange if I suddenly walked back in with a Blinder."
"Why did you say no in the first place?"
"Because money is tight. That was another reason I was hesitant to come, honest."
"You're not paying (Y/N)."
"Oh, Finn-"
"No, because I literally get this stuff for free." the small window into the room opened."Speaking of."
He reached over and grabbed our drinks, handing mine to me before clinking the glasses together. Unlike Finn, who threw the whole drink back, I sipped on my wine, and god was it good. He slammed the glass back down onto the table, letting out a satisfied breath.
"So what have you been up to since school?"
"Well, I've got a job at this clothes shop, you might have passed it but we only deal with women’s clothing, so I doubt you’ve been in. Uh, I actually started there as a shop assistant after I left school, you know, running errands and doing the little things no one else wanted to do. Then they started giving me proper jobs, I’m also a book keeper now and-” I glanced at Finn, realising that I was rambling,“-sorry, I’m talking too much.”
“No, no you’re not.” he chuckled, waving a hand in the air.
“Long story short, I work in a clothes shop. What about you?”
I closed my eyes as soon as I finished my sentence, wincing at my stupidity.
“I didn’t mean, I wasn’t trying to be smart or pry, obviously I know...no I don’t know...”
“You’re cute when you stumble over your words.”
I wasn’t expecting that.“E-excuse me?”
Before things could get any more awkward, the door opened, making us both jump. I felt my heart drop down into the pit of my stomach when I saw who it was, and I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me; his brothers were here.
“What the fuck are you doing in here Finn boy?”Arthur asked (if you didn’t know all their names, you had to be incredibly simple).
“Failing to get another bird in your bed?” John smirked.
“Shut up John.” Finn spat.“This is (Y/N), she’s an old friend from school.”
They filtered in. John scoffed.“Surprised you remember anything about school. Have you asked him what five pus five is?”
John and Arthur laughed as they sat down opposite us, Thomas standing besides the window for the drinks. I clasped my hands together as they started to shake out of nerves. I was in a room with the Shelby brothers, the men who ran one of the most feared gangs in England, and I had no clue what to do with myself.
“Um, I think I should go.” I pathetically mumbled out.
“Don’t be rude Finn,” Thomas said,“show the lovely, young lady out.”
Finn was glaring at his brothers as we stood. I slowed down my steps so I didn’t appear to be running away from them. Finn opened the door for me, and I felt weightless as soon as I stepped out of that room. He followed me out, running a hand down his face.
“I’m sorry about them. They’re just being their usual stupid selves.” he apologised.
“It’s alright, really. Don’t tell them they bothered me or anything because they really didn’t.”
“You don’t have to worry. They won’t do anything to you because we had a drink together.”
“Sorry, just not used to...”
“Meeting a gangster?”
I hummed in agreement.“Yeah.”
“Look, I definitely need to go back in there. But I liked this. Apart from how we bumped into each other.”
“Yes, that could have been different.”
“I would like to do this again though.”
“You would?”
“There you go again, acting all surprised. How about this weekend?”
“I-I’m free this weekend.”
“Great. I’ll pick you up at six on Saturday.” he smiled at me, turning to go back into the private room before calling the bartender.“Oh, Harry, another wine for my friend.”
He winked at me, then disappeared into the room. I heard heckling and teasing from his brothers. I could feel that my cheeks were heating up from blushing, though I also couldn’t help but smile. Thanking the bartender for the wine, I quickly took it, freezing when I saw my friends staring at me. Sighing, I took a big gulp of the drink before making my way towards them. This was going to be a longer night than I thought.
#finn shelby#finn shelby imagine#finn shelby imagines#finn shelby x reader#finn shelby one shot#finn shelby fanfic#finn shelby fan fic#finn shelby fanfiction#finn shelby fan fiction#peaky blinders#peaky blinders imagine#peaky blinders imagines#peaky blinders x reader#peaky blinders one shot#peaky blinders fanfic#peaky blinders fan fic#peaky blinders fanfiction#peaky blinders fan fiction
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A scene with Five and Allison?
“You know,” Allison says, “At first I thought you might be a robot.”
Five looks up from the memo pad he found next to a bible in the motel room’s nightstand that he’s scribbling in, “What? Why?”
Allison shrugs lazily, swirling her plastic cup of cheap whiskey. “I mean, you did drop out of the sky right after dad died, looking exactly the same as when you left. Plus I can name at least three villains who’d probably still be happy to mess with us.” She gives a thoughtful frown. “Or would have been happy to.”
Five’s ready to argue about that, because of course he’s not a robot that’s ridiculous, but…then again, it’s no more ridiculous than anything else that’s happened. Besides, mom exists. Existed. Maybe. There’s no answer to that question yet.
Five twists in the cheap plastic pool chair he’s sitting in. “When’d you figure out I wasn’t?”
Allison smirks, “When you starting insulting Diego. I mean I’m sure plenty of them would want to, it was just a little too on the nose.”
Five has to give her that one too.
Allison pushes back from the patio table she’s leaning on and gets up from her own cheap plastic chair, leaving her still almost full glass as she meanders over to the pool Five’s sitting next to. She shucks her shoes and sits down to put her feet in the water. She gives a hum like something amuses her about it but doesn’t explain herself to Five.
Five turns back to the notepad in front of him, pen poised above it ready to write…nothing. Nothing worthwhile anyway. There’s no math to be figured here – the timeline’s just royally fucked up because they fucked it up. All they’ve got right now is this shitty motel they’ve taken up refuge in and a couple of bottles of alcohol bought with money from the 1960s. He gives up, drops the paper on the cement with a huff.
It’s gotta be midnight, maybe later, the motel is quiet and only he and Allison remain outside. Klaus and Luther killed a bottle of rum between them before anyone noticed and Allison had forced them off to bed but the light in their room’s still on. Diego and Vanya gave up the ghost a little while ago, mumbling goodnights. Five’s too wound up to sleep yet, he’s not sure why Allison’s still up.
“We did always wonder where you’d gone,” Allison says to him over her shoulder, and it actually catches Five off guard.
He hasn’t had three seconds to spare thinking about it in the scant two weeks he’s been back with them, his world too chaotic, time moving at a pace he can only do his best to keep up with. But he had thought about it before, in those 45 years, he wondered sometimes what his siblings thought happened to him.
He settles back into the chair. “What’d you come up with?”
Allison smiles, tilts her head as she says, “Klaus thought you ran off to the circus. ‘The Amazing Disappearing Boy’. He was always jealous you got to ride the elephants and pet lions.”
Five can’t help the small smile that tugs at his mouth. Of course Klaus would be jealous even though it wasn’t true. “What else?” He asks.
“Diego thought you joined the FBI or the…CIA or whatever. Or some secret underground cabal of superscientists. And Ben-” she shakes her head with a soft laugh, “Ben would joke you’d come back to us as a supervillain yourself and we’d have to fight you.”
Five does smile at that. Ben was sneaky like that, he looked like the quiet one, the shy one, but Five can imagine him teasing the others with something like that. Probably even came up with a fake scenario worthy of one of their comic books.
Five won’t ask what Vanya thought, he knows enough from her book that she probably never told them. “Luther?”
Allison twists around to fully face him, propped up against her arm. “Well one time he asked me if I thought you’d succeeded. I think he wanted to believe you had.”
He’d had an argument with Luther the day before he left, he thought it was because Luther didn’t believe in him but Five’d had plenty of time to replay it in his head and now he can’t say for sure what it was really about.
“What about you?” Five asks. It’s not adrenaline keeping him awake anymore but it’s a buzz sort of like it as he listens to his sister tell him these things he’d always wanted to know.
Allison pauses, watches the ripples she’s kicking up in the water. “I thought what we all reallythought: you’d run away. You ran out the door and kept running.”
He’d run too far, he hadn’t meant to.
“We thought you’d decided you didn’t want to come back, that you were sick of dad and the Academy and you didn’t want to do the whole ‘hero’ thing, so you found a new family and you started a new life.” She shrugs, her smile somewhere between sad and wistful.
He wants to tell her that’s not true, that’s not true at all. Not just because it’s not what happened but because it’s not what he wanted to happen. He already had a family, for everything he hated it was never them. But he can’t seem to make the words come.
Allison’s back to looking across the pool as she continues. “We imagined you in one of those nice little houses we’d see through the car windows. Ben and Luther would say you’d have a room full of books and toys and Diego said you’d get to stay up late, Klaus said you had ice cream for dinner every night. I thought you’d maybe have a pet, like a dog or a cat.” When she looks over her shoulder her eyes twinkle with amusement. “Although, honestly, sometimes I’d imagine you in a boarding school, in a house all covered in vines-”
“Like Madeline,” Five finishes. She’d loved that book at a kid, Mom would read it to them.
Allison grins. “Like Madeline.”
If only, Five thinks. If only he’d failed and simply refused to turn around, if he’d found a new home and a new family. Unlike her though, unlike all of them, he can’t imagine them. Can’t imagine the kind of family he’d run to, who those people would be. He’d never considered anyone else a possibility, he’s surprised now to think they’d thought he could.
Allison’s gaze goes distant. “Ben…it was different with Ben. We knew he was gone. But Five-” she pauses, her attention coming back to him, “we just thought you’d run away.”
He shakes his head. “It was never you guys, you know. It’s not that I wanted to leave you.” He hates how scratchy his voice sounds.
Her smile returns, softer this time, “You came back at least.”
Five lets out a harsh breath, furrows his brow. “I sure did didn’t I?”
Allison throws her head back and laughs out loud, Five is surprised to find himself grinning.
She settles and shakes her head to herself, another private thought that Five is more hopeful about hearing someday. She swings her legs out of the pool and picks up her shoes. “Alright, bed time I think.”
Five was originally going to share a room with Luther until Klaus had been shooed off with him earlier so now the only bed left is the other twin in Allison’s room. Allison gives a little wave of her hand like she expects him to follow like of course he should. They leave their shoes at the ends of the beds, and Allison turns off the lamp on the nightstand between them.
“I could still be a robot,” Five says, “or a supervillain.” Allison laughs again.
Five thinks he should be disappointed that his siblings thought that he’d just decided he didn’t want to be around them and that he’d been happy for so long without them. Disappointed that they were so sure of it that they’d never thought to look for him. But he can’t be because all their ideas were better than the reality and he finds he likes that they came up with all these happy fantasies for him. To them he’d lead a very different life. Then he came back and proved them all wrong in the worst way.
#tua fic#umbrella academy fanfic#the umbrella academy#five hargreeves#allison hargreeves#my fic#of course i said 'drabble' and it still ends up being over 1000 words#t.ua
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Wooo! Writing shoes are back on and i’m actually really happy that i’m finally able to write again. This chapter is a bit shorter than normal but the next two are heavy hitters so it’s alright
Angel in Gotham: Part 1 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4 ~ Part 5 ~ Part 6 ~ Ao3
Demon in Gotham: Part 1 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4 ~ Ao3
Fanart for AiG: Riddler ~ Joker thank you @thegreysman
Please tag me in any fanart you draw for this guys ^^
oooOOOooo
Damian typically liked patrol.
Jumping from rooftop to rooftop under the cover of the night was always exhilarating. Parkour just wasn’t the same without a belt of weapons and a costume, it was always a good way to burn of excess energy and get his mind focused.
Sure, it was his job to protect Gotham so he couldn’t be joking around, but he had to admit he liked the physical activity. He took his job seriously but taking it seriously didn’t mean it had to be unenjoyable.
Patrols were a time when he didn’t feel constrained, didn’t have to play a part or meet expectations. Nothing could ruin the cool gotham city nights on the rooftops.
Well, almost nothing.
After all, Damian’s father had the insane habit of adopting shitty ass kids for his crime fighting ring. Which meant Damian had this awful sickness called siblings. And the only thing that could ruin his nice patrols were the chortling of the other costumed idiots.
The worst nights were when all his brothers went.
Every. Single. Brother.
And what made it worse on top of that?
When they had something they felt they could tease him about. And when they were all teasing him about the same thing at the same time.
He was going to snap and stab one of them. His father might be anti murder but he didn’t have to know…
Damian shook his head. Bad thoughts.
“Thinking of your Angel?” Drake seemed to have a death wish and Damian was all about granting fucking wishes right now.
“Why do you all insist on being here?” he grumbled to himself. Because really they didn’t have to be. No bat signal, probably a few minor purse snatching crimes that one or two could handle easily. Why were they all in costume? Take the night off, stop fucking bothering him.
Annoying Fuck #1 snorted next to him when he said that, clearly not planning to be reasonable. “What, don’t like us teasing you about your Angel, demon spawn?” Todd snorted.
Damian ignored him. “Batman, shouldn’t he not be allowed to patrol with us?” His father could at least tell Todd to go home. Then when his back was turned he wouldn’t witness what happened to Dra-
“C’mon, I haven’t killed anyone and I want to hang out with my little bro! It’s not every day that Robin gets his first crush!”
Annoying Fuck #2, Drake, nearly slipped and fell from laughter.
Damian’s face warmed under his mask. “I do not have a crush you-“
“Focus on the job,” As always, father was on his side. “You can make fun of Robin later when we aren’t patrolling,” the traitorous bastard added.
Damian didn’t want to be the fucking blood son anymore.
He glared at Batman, scoffing to himself. “Then if you’ll excuse me, I’ll take my own route.”
“I’ll go with you little bird!”
Fucking fuck fuck.
Because of fucking course Grayson suggested that. And of fucking course Damian momentarily forgot that Grayson was back and patrolling too, leaving him unprepared for the suggestion. Grayson’s uncharacteristic quietness was the worst thing at times.
Fucking hell why’d they all have to be here tonight?
Proving himself to truly be a traitor, his father nodded to Grayson’s suggestion. So Damian, previously wanting to get away with his brothers and dream of murdering them alone, now had a tagalong stopping such a fun activity.
At this rate he’d have frown lines at 23.
Damian went off, not waiting for Grayson. He knew he’d easily keep pace though, so the halfhearted dream of being fully alone wouldn’t happen.
“Robin, wait here a second.” Oh fuck no. That’s Grayson’s I want to talk voice. Too bad for him because Damian did not want to talk. At all. Especially about anything Grayson might want to talk about. Because Grayson wanted to talk about French Angels and Riddlers and Spars and-
“Robin, are you listening?”
“No, Nightwing, I’m not.” Damian stared at him and raised a brow. “What is there to talk about?”
Grayson huffed, annoyed. Good. Fucker deserves it after what he and the others put him through these last few days. “I was asking if you actually had a crush or not. They’re teasing you but I’ve been,” at WE all day, Damian knew, “busy all day. I can’t tell if they’re making something out of nothing and I’d rather hear it from the horse’s mouth, so to speak.”
There was a time when Damian would have said he wasn’t a horse. When he was younger, he didn’t know idioms and expressions that well. He considered saying it now, to try and change the subject, but he also knew Grayson didn’t let things go easily. Which wasn’t very good.
Because Damian wasn’t sure how to answer.
He wasn’t sure he wanted to answer it, even to himself. His weedkiller wouldn’t arrive for a few more fucking days, he wasn’t prepared for this.
Though maybe that in of itself showed the answer to Grayson’s question…
Fucking fuck fuck.
He shook himself from those thoughts. Grayson was waiting on an answer and he didn’t have time to get lost in thought about his Ang- Marinette. Marinette.
Damian settled for glaring at Grayson. “My private life is not any business of yours.”
Grayson snorted. “Suure little bird. She’s one of the French students, right?”
“Don’t say that right now,” he snapped. Not while they were in costume, not while they could be listened to. “Focus on the job, Nightwing.”
Grayson put his hands up in surrender. “Race you to Wayne Enterprises?”
Damian didn’t wait for an answer, jumping to the next roof and making his way as fast as he could. He was determined to beat his adopted brother’s sorry ass, not that he cared about winning. It wasn’t that he was competitive, he simply didn’t want to continue this discussion. That was all. That’s fucking it.
Grayson laughed behind him, and the race began.
-----
They were taking a break near the Batcave. No activity yet, but they stayed suited up incase that changed. The night was still young, after all.
Batman instructed them to meet there through the comms. Damian and Grayson, further from the cave, made it there last. Grayson luckily hadn’t brought up and other conversation during patrol, and Damian hoped that would hold ou-
The other two idiots were waiting like the fucking lunatics they are.
Fucking fuck fuck.
“Did the demon spawn tell you about his precious Angel?” Todd clearly decided that he would die in seven days by saying that, big dumb fucking grin on his face and hair messy from removing his dumbass helmet.
“What was her name again? Mary?” Drake knew her name and was just being a little bitch. Damian decided not to give him the fucking bait, going over to a place to sit-
“Marie something, French and I think with brown eyes?”
“They’re blue,” Damian bit out. Fuck, their stupidity had infected him, he spoke before thinking. Was there a cure? He doubted it as they were all still stupid and have been for years. Fucking fuck the last thing he needs is to be on their level of idiocy.
“Right, right,” Jason’s wolfish smug grin was showing exactly how much of a fucking bitch he planned to be. Damian wanted to kick his face in.
“Little bird was pretty tight lipped on patrol,” Grayson said lightly as if he didn’t just stab him in the back.
“It’d be rude to kiss and tell,” Damian was going to strangle Drake with his own two hands.
“I haven’t kissed her!” He snapped again. His face was very warm, did he get sunburned somehow?? “We’re friends you imbeciles!”
“Friends that hold hands,” Drake pointed out.
“And tour Gotham together, alone.” Todd shortened his life span even more.
“And invite each other over to their house, where they never invited anyone before, to eat lunch.”
“Look how red his face is!”
“Little bird probably even planned to buy her ice cream! That’s why they were there when the Riddler showed up!”
“I’ll bed demon spawn-“
Damian stormed out of the room. Blood was roaring in his ears and he needed to- he just. He fucking needed fucking out of here. Away from those fuckers. Or he’d actually follow through with his thinly veiled threats and he’d rather not get blood on his costume.
He hated siblings with a passion. If his father ever considered adopting again Damian would fill all of his shoes with centipedes and rip the third seam out of every pair of pants he owned.
I don’t have a crush on her. I don’t. She’s wonderful and amazing, an angel, but I don’t like Ang- Marinette like that. She’s a friend I made and that is all.
Damian grabbed some throwing knives for target practice. Not on his brothers this time. He wanted to clear his head without those fucks nearby.
He threw one. The aim was a bit off, and he frowned. His aim was impeccable, why was he off right now? Why is having a crush on Marinette a bad thing?
No. He shook his head. He didn’t want to think those fucking thoughts right now. He threw another, harder. It went deep into the target, still off by more than he was happy with. He growled lowly.
Ange- Marinette is pure and good and wonderful. I was raised by assassins and I can’t completely shake their ideals.
Another knife. Damian’s grip on them tightened. Why was he missing?
I’m a vigilante and Damian Wayne. I have blood on my hands and money to my name and she wants to make her fashion empire herself.
Damian got more knives. His frustration was growing with each thought. They kept coming back as he tried to dismiss them, kept distracting him from the target.
She’s a talented designer. She’s incredibly smart, knows how to fight. Beautiful, dark hair and freckles and blue eyes.
Another knife sailed through the air.
I’m not anything of note without my last name or costume. She’s amazing without needing either.
Damian walked over and began taking the knives off the targets. Maybe they were fucking with his aim. He should get rid of them. Focus on removing them. Stop thinking about her.
But no matter how many fucking times he tried to redirect his thoughts, they came back.
She doesn’t have to tolerate me.
She’s wonderful and innocent.
She doesn’t deserve to be dragged down.
I don’t want to hurt her.
Damian’s hands were on his face, pushing at his eyes and trying to stop the thoughts. His Ange- Marinette was wonderful he knew that, but he didn’t think the other things. Not constantly anyway, he helped people as Robin. He was his father’s blood son. He wasn’t unhappy with himself.
But that doesn’t mean I’m good enough for Marinette.
He grabbed a knife from the table he set them on and threw it blindly, as if throwing the thought itself out and away.
It hit the center perfectly.
Damian took a deep breath. Everything was fucking overwhelming right now, and he didn’t want to think about it anymore.
But it seemed he’d have to.
Fucking fuck fuck.
Okay, okay. He… He might have a crush on Marinette.
Admitting it, oddly, seemed to lift a weight off his shoulders. Damian took another deep breath.
He has a crush on Marinette. But he values her a friend very much. He isn’t going to do anything about his crush, because she deserves someone as amazing and angelic as her, and Damian isn’t that.
But that’s okay. Because he already loves being her friend. And his weedkiller isn’t too far away.
Damian calmed down. He threw some more knives. They were all on target.
She’ll always be my friend and Angel, if I have any say in it. I’ll make sure whoever she choses is worthy of her.
Damian had just thrown his third when his father spoke through their comms. “Poison Ivy sighting at Gotham Hotel.”
The six words turned Damian’s recently found peaceful mood onto its head. Ice water poured into his and filled his limbs with dread. His chest was tight, as if someone was grabbing at his lungs and they were closing. The weeds of worry were strangling him.
That’s my Angel’s hotel.
He had dropped her off there with Alfred just earlier that day. She was staying there with her class. They were supposed to be safe and protected, she was supposed to be safe and protected.
Damian’s knives hit the ground but his feet hit it faster as he ran through the cave to the exit. Ivy best not lay a finger on her or she would lose her entire arm.
His Angel wouldn’t get hurt, not if he could help it.
#daminette#maribat#Marinette#Damian Wayne#maridami#damimari#marinettexdamian#damian x marinette#miraculous ladybug#batman#batboys#batbrothers
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My RL gameplay (18+)
!CW! adult themes
I went out with Ana to talk to her. Ana told me about her problems at school with these sick private students. I told Ana to tell our parents! After all, they pay a lot of money for this fucking school and Ana gets screwed there. Ana has a really hard time at school and I was so worried. She was threatened, and I was insulted too, which I don’t give a shit about. But I’ll talk about it another time, when the whole thing gets worse. That would be too much text now.
And Ana also talked with me, about this thing with N. & P. She told me her open and honest opinion. 🤔
Ana: Yeah, I’m gonna tell Mom & Dad, I just didn’t want you to get in trouble with Dad again. Because of that brawl Nico started.
Me: It doesn’t matter, Ana! Pls tell Mom & Dad! And you have Sam! He’s on your side.
Ana: Yeah, I would have gone crazy without Sam!
Me: Do you want me to come to school and talk to them?😟
Ana: No, A.! If, then I’d rather ask N.! Tell him to beat these guys up.😠
Me: No, it’ll only make things worse! But if one of them threatens you, they’ll get in trouble with me! 😠
Ana: Haha! You? 🤣 No, sis! I can do it by myself, you know me!... Hey A.! Seriously now! Are you in love with Philip?🤨 'Cause I think he’s totally into you!
Me: Whaaat? 😳 Do you really think, he has a crush on me? I mean...that he REALLY likes me?
Ana: Oh my, A.!! 😲😱 You fell for him! I know you better than anyone! 😠 You always fall in love so fast!🤦♀️.... But that was just sex? Or not? Did you have sex with him and Nico or JUST with him? 😦
Me: At first it was just sex! But now it’s...more. And last night, I had Sex with P. Without N.! And a few days ago, I had sex with both of them. 😬🙈
Ana: FUCK!😱 And Nico knows that you had Sex with P. last night?
Me: Yes he knows and he wants this! 🤷♀️
Ana: How the hell does this work? They both love you! I mean, sure! They’re having fun with you, but how are you going to....manage this A.?
Me: I’m just with both of them. And I love Nico! I’m not going to hurt him! I didn’t choose it that way, but now that’s the way it is, and I want to be with Philip. He’s so cute, and I just can’t send him away.😳
Ana: Ok? You have sex with both of them, and it certainly feels good, but... watch out!!!! 😨
Me: Huh?🤷♀️ Nico loves me and Philip is my friend too and he’s always nice to me.
Ana: Are you 13 or what?🤨 They are having fun with you! That’s the way men are! It turns them BOTH on, not just N.!!! You’re a woman “used” by two men, and apparently that’s what these two are into! Do you understand, A.??? 🤨 Philip is just like Nico! Don’t expect Philip to touch you with kid gloves.
Me: How do you know? 😦 And Philip ist NOT using me! And neither does N.! 😠
Ana: No, but...that’s why it didn’t work out with Philip and me, I don’t like guys like Nico and him!
Me: I thought it was too.....boring for you with him?🤨
Ana: I was probably much more boring for him. You and I are the complete opposite of each other. I’m not saying that Philip is bad, nor Nico! But be careful A.! That’s all!
Me: Ok, promised!.... Oh wow! Nico has finally changed! Now we don’t have to see him in his trunks anymore.
Ana: Holly shit, A.! How do you handle two guys?🤦♀️
Me: Agh, you’re exaggerating! They’re both sooo cute! 😍 (🤣🤦♀️)
Ana: 😧 😧 😧 Are you stoned, or what? 🤨
Oh, and N. and I got bunnies. Not in RL of course! And they like him much more than me. 😕🤷♀️
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Midnight ball | Chuuya x reader |
Midnight Ball | Chuuya x reader | (female reader)
I feel like I'm doing Chuuya dirty with this one-
Warnings- references to some NSFW themes, inferred attempted rape, mentions of drug use.
(really hesitant on actually posting this... nothing happens, but I don't wanna make people too uncomfortable)
Undercover missions were normal in the port mafia. Every once in a while they would come up. You went on a lot of these missions. Even the ones you didn’t care for.
The air was brisk, not too cold, but not a comfortable warmth either. It wasn’t every day you were called in on what should have been your day off. The clouds covered the noon sun, keeping its warmth tucked away. It felt as if it may rain. Maybe snow would fall with how cold the air was. The trees were bare of their leaves and the grass slowly warping to brown. The winter flowers, in full bloom. You shivered tugging the scarf closer as you walked towards the black buildings. Stepping inside was bliss, the air warm and welcoming. You walked slowly towards the elevator stepping inside as it carried you to the level Mori’s office was.
Making your way into the office, your eyes landed on the short male you had become close to. Running a hand through your hair you looked to Mori. “Ya know it’s my day off right? This better be important.” you had guts talking to your boss like this. Elise snickered from the corner of the large room, drawing a picture. Most likely something rather disturbing, as she tended to do.
You hadn’t noticed it before, but Chuuya’s face was contorted in both disgust and anger. Whatever this was, gave him quite displeasure. “He’s having us go undercover. Instead of picking another female… he’s making me wear a fucking dress.” his eyes narrowed in Mori's direction.
“Well, you work well with (y/n). I carefully considered members like Kouyou, but none of them matched what I needed for the minor mission." Mori grinned as Chuuya huffed, crossing his arms.
You tried to imagine him in a dress, but the only thing that you could think of was Kouyou, considering they did both have ginger hair. Shrugging you grabbed Chuuya’s hand, tugging him away. You figured he could brief you on the mission later.
~
As the sun fell under the horizon, and the moon took its place in night's embrace, the two of you settled inside the limo. Chuuya’s arms were crossed as he tugged on the dress. His eyes set in heavy glares. His hair happened to be up in a neat bun. It had taken a lot of fighting and shouting that could have deafened somebody. He was even dolled up with light specks of makeup. The red dress suited his form, his height made it ideal for heels. He already had a feminine figure, so there wasn’t much you needed to do to pass him as a female. He kept squirming around glaring at you. “How the fuck do girls wear these dreaded things.” he hissed, referring to the corset hidden beneath the silk he wore.
Snickering you shrugged leaning back. “They say beauty is pain,” you hummed, leaning back in your seat. This wasn’t ideal for you either. You much preferred to be slightly dressed down from this. Looking as fancy as you did now wasn’t modest, and it sure wasn’t something you liked to wear. You were sucking it up so why couldn’t Chuuya? Could he really be all that uncomfortable? “I could loosen it a bit.” you offered, but Chuuya shook his head staring at himself. He had mastered heals within a handful of moments so you weren’t worried about him tripping. The real challenge would be flirting with the target.
This was a two-person job due to the size of the party and the security around the target. One of you would distract the guards while the other smooth-talked their way into a private area with the target. They would either get the extent of the information this person had managed to take early this morning or silence him. You two hadn’t decided who would be doing what. It was more one of those whoever gets there first situations. The car pulled up to the entrance just as your thoughts finished. Stepping onto the ground you waited for Chuuya. The clunk of his heels on the pavement were steady and even. You went to remind him about his expression, but he rolled his eyes. “I know, no scowling, glaring, or yelling.”
You smiled gripping the edge of the dress, pulling it up so you could walk the stairs without tripping on the (f/c) fabric. Your hair was down but pinned in specific places. “Don’t forget, no swearing. We have to act ladylike Chu.” clicking his tongue, he pinched the fabric of his dress and walked up after you. Entering the large mansion you were escorted to the ballroom. Standing at the railing that overlooked the floor you smiled. Never in your life had you been to one of these. You truly wanted to participate at least a little.
Chuuya noticed the excited glimmer of your eyes and grabbed your hand. Tonight, you both were trying to pass as two female teenage siblings whose parents wanted a night alone. Without a boyfriend, the two of you showed up alone. A naive action when it came to noble parties. These were incredible to get into. You had to have power and money somewhere. He pulled you down the stairs, flashing you a small smile. He wouldn’t admit but this wasn’t that bad. He didn’t mind the corset or the way the dress flowed in the wind. He minded the hair since he always wore it in one specific style. He’d done this once before with Dazai but doing this with you was different. Probably because he wasn’t being forced to be the fiance this time. “We might as well try to enjoy ourselves.” he was surprisingly skilled at keeping his voice higher in pitch. There were a few occasional slips, but he sounded somewhat feminine.
Smirking you pulled him to the food table. “I’d say you're actually enjoying yourself Chu.” his eyes narrowed for a second before playfully hitting your shoulder.
“Sure I am.” he huffed looking over the table of snacks. He grabbed one of the tea-sandwiches and took small bites. Despite how he tried to enjoy himself, he was focused on the mission. There was still no sign of the target. Two older-looking gentlemen came up to the pair of you, holding their hands out.
“Would you two care for a dance?” Chuuya’s mouth twitched to snarl, but he quickly put on a smile despite how much he wanted to string profanities. You glanced at him, inhaling softly, you tapped his shoulder as if to reassure him.
“Depends~ how old do you think we are?” you two had decided on your roles already. To spare Chuuya some dignity you would try to be the more seductive while he played the part of the shyer, more innocent twin. Since he was a boy playing a girl, he matched the innocent child-like stereotype well, considering he didn’t have breasts.
One of the men standing in front of you chuckled lightly. “Teens, though it’s not like we're hitting on you. We simply wish to take you for a dance. You appear lonely.” Chuuya was sick to his stomach already. The last time he’d done this he didn’t have to deal with these situations because Dazai had been there. Yet, as he looked to you, he tilted his head. Your hand grabbed the man's as you looked back to Chuuya.
“Trust me, it’ll be fun. There aren't any men our age, so trust me.” the act flew softly off your lips. There was a hidden motion when you flicked your ankle. It would have passed as your feet were slightly sore to anybody else. Chuuya glanced to the railing, spotting the target. He nodded, faking a smile as the two of you entered the dance floor.
With every pulse of the music, you got closer and closer to the edge. Your eyes tracing for the amount of guards. Though based on what you were observing you had both already found them. It was a widely known fact your target had a thing for younger females. Not young like Elise but teenagers who appear frail. You and Chuuya most definitely looked the part tonight. Dipping you back your eyes met Chuuya's, a smirk crossing both of your expressions. When you returned to the normal position you switched partners.
Things started going slightly south from there. While you two had managed to keep your dancing rather close to one another, you were starting to drift apart now. Chuuya moved closer to the stairwell, while you made your way towards the back doors. Despite how you tried to move back towards him, your dance partner kept you moving in that direction. Eventually, you noted what was going on. Occasionally these types of missions had unexpected twists. This was one of those twists. You hadn’t thought to watch for other predators. Trying to rip your hands from his you glared. “I ought to get back to my sister.” you wove innocence into your voice, but he paid no mind as if he had not heard you. As the music ended, the rough grip that had succeeded in pulling the two of you apart let go. A silent satisfactory smirk placed over his lips. Walking from you he headed back to find another dancing partner.
Walking around you began to search for Chuuya among the crowd. Innocently asking couples and other women if they had seen a short, rather young-looking female ginger dressed in red. They had shaken their heads but one couple pointed towards the stairs. You curtsied respectfully, racing to the stairs only to be stopped by the two men you had previously been dancing with. Batting your eyelashes you explained somebody had seen your sister walk up these stairs not too long ago.
You couldn’t help but feel worried despite knowing Chuuya could handle himself with the utmost care. He was strong both physically and ability-wise. You bit the inside of your cheek figuring, they probably weren't idiots. If they had separated the two of you they had to think you already knew something was up. You'd probably made that worse when you tried pulling away in the dance. The high-heels were beginning to get rather annoying. They were difficult to run in, jumping would probably result in a twisted ankle if you don't land perfectly. You made sure to blend away into the crowd. Losing their eyes you slipped through doors until you made it into a hallway. Laying out the map of the building in your head you walked the halls trying to find the staircase leading upstairs. You had to dodge behind corners to avoid security. It took you close to ten minutes to finally reach the stairs. There were so many rooms it would be difficult to find which one to enter. You narrowed it down to two in your head. The others would be a waste of time, the two you had narrowed it to were close to the ballroom, small, and were bar areas. Off-limits to party-goers as well. There would be no interruptions to their perverted actions.
You looked around, spotting a guard, you gripped the edge of your glove with your teeth. Walking up as if you were scared you began to stumble purposely over words. “I-i think I’m lost. I needed the ladies room and I couldn't find my sis or the ballroom.” faking tears as you got closer, the security officer's eyes softened as you approached. Taking you as a younger female instead of an adult, he offered out his hand. You gripped it before smirking as your ability activated. Moving your hand away, you tilted your head. “Sleep,” you commanded them. They fell to the floor with a thud. Grabbing the gun from their belt you checked that the safety was on. Assured it was you stashed it in your dress. Walking to the first room you burst inside finding no sign anybody had been there, you closed the door.
Making your way to the next option you pressed an ear to the door. Whispers and the sound of metal sent you to a light panic. Glaring at the door you pulled the gun out and switched the safety off. Entering the room you pointed the gun only to hear clicks follow. Your eyes darted to the sound. “So there were four.” snarling you entered and shut the door with your heel. Your mind began thinking of every way to get away from this situation. You lowered your gun with a defeated sigh. Letting it drop to the floor, one of the guns pressed to your head. Their hand grabbed your wrist as you looked to the mop of passed-out ginger.
“Damn idiot,” you hissed knowing this was probably the result of drugging. There was no way in hell he’d be beaten by mere ability-less scum. Shoved to the floor you glared. Your hands were pulled above you. Looking to the side you snickered at the poor idiot who touched your skin. “Kill your boss,” you commanded and their body dropped you and turned to the person whose hands were on your love interest. When the next guy pointed the gun at you, you swept them off their feet, whistled, and pointed. “Shoot them.” with another fire, two of three were dead. “Now shoot yourself.” and so they ended up three of three. Tossing off the heels you made your way over to Chuuya. Checking his pulse you rolled your eyes.
You lifted him in your arms before leaving the bloody scene. Your dress was now stained with splatters of crimson. Jumping from the window, then to a tree, and down, you placed Chuuya in the limo. Grabbing a bottle of water you opened his mouth and poured it down his throat. He stirred a bit, his head falling on your shoulder. Blushing lightly you found the back of his dress was open and the corset already loosened. “Got there just in time.” you sighed as the limo pulled to your small apartment. Lifting him you carried him inside. Dropping him to the bed you sat on the opposite side of the bed.
It took three hours before his eyes fluttered open. Holding his head, he glanced at you. “Why the fuck are you here?” of course his first words would be aggressive. He could hide it all he wanted by the shiver of his body and the way his hands moved to his back made it clear. Finding the strings and ribbon undone as well as torn his eyes widened for a fraction.
“Sorry, I wasn’t expecting to be separated like that.” you played around with your gloves looking back at him you pulled a thing of makeup wipes from the side table. Tossing it to him, you sighed. “I hope you don’t mind, I had Dazai lock pick your door and get you your usual clothes.” he couldn’t even be mad at you for letting that bastard into his house. His mind was still focused on recollecting what had happened. He was beyond humiliated. He should have seen it coming. “I should have gotten there faster. They shouldn’t have been able to even get that close. I’m so sorry Chuuya! I’ll talk to Mori about not putting you on these types of missions. I know you're mad but please… say something.” you twirled a strand of your hair on your finger.
“I should have been prepared.” he looked away from you before feeling your arms around his body. Your head laid in the crook of his neck as you shook your head violently. He felt something wet soil, the shoulder of his dress. Turning so he could pick your head up, he blinked, startled to see the water dripping from your eyes. “You’re crying?” he sounded baffled, confused even.
“I should have let you be yourself! If I hadn’t pushed you to act like an innocent defenseless child, that situation would have been different.'' Chuuya gripped your shoulders laughing lightly as he shook his head. “You didn’t even have a good time! You hated being there.”
“No, no, (y/n)... I... Fuck!” he was bad at words, so as he tried forming the correct words he kept shaking his head. “I enjoyed spending time with you! I’d prefer to accompany you as a man next time. Neither of us are at fault. Missions go south. Nobody got hurt, sure I feel like an idiot, I’m utterly humiliated that I let my guard down and got drugged up, but nothing happened.” he pressed his forehead against yours, his thumb wiping away the tears on your cheeks.
This was out of character for him, but it was a side only you gotta see. He hated seeing you break down or get upset over things you had no control over. His hands wrapped around your ungloved ones. Your skin touches him with a small shyness. “Can I?” he asked watching you nod as his lips passed over yours.
“We both deserve a break from work. How about we tell Mori we are taking two days off?” you hummed looking into his eyes. He smirked and nodded. His lips pressing back to yours in a heated kiss. You pressed him underneath you with a smirk. His face went red as he glared.
“You’re a fucking pervert.” he hissed watching you snicker.
“Wow Chu, I'm so offended.” you leaned back into a kiss as his cheeks turned a brighter shade of red. “Think this makes us a real couple.” he rolled his eyes as you rolled to lay next to him.
“Yeah, I guess.”
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Anthony’s Stupid Daily Blog (275): Fri 16th Dec 2022
There was still snow all over the roads when I woke up to check at 6:00am this morning. Normally whenever I call the taxi place it only takes a couple of seconds to get through but today every time I’d ring is be on hold for about two minutes and the the fucking thing would just cut me off. Since I couldn’t get through to be cunts I had to go for the bus again. It wasn’t so bad because once I got on the bus I continued reading Bootlegger’s Daughter and thankfully it’s the first book I’ve been genuinely engaged with this year so I was completely distracted from the fact that I hate the bus (actually it’s the bus companies that it hate not the actual buses themselves. If I had my own private one and a driver to take me anywhere I wanted and it turned up when it was fucking supposed to then I wouldn’t have a problem with them). I’m going to try to go for a bus every day until the snow and ice fucks off. I’ve worked really hard (ish) this year to build up a little next egg so I don’t want to start blowing it on taxis like I did when I worked at the cafe. This little kerfuffle got me thinking that I should book my taxi for Boxing Day in advance as the lines will be jammed on the day. I should do but being the lazy fucker I am I will probably leave it too late and end up having to walk to work. Compulsory overtime is nearly over and fuck me it was draining. Back in November I decided that I would start working six days a week in order to get as much money as I could by the end of the year. Obviously the extra money has been welcome but the lack of time I’ve had to myself lately as a result of sacrificing two of my three days off has taken its toll. I haven’t really done anything in the last six weeks other than work and I’m starting to get sick of the constantly sight and sounds of factory machinery. It was an attractive and lucrative idea but I have to admit that I prefer being worse off financially if it means having three days of down time. I think in future I’ll start doing overtime on two of my three days off but only if it’s pack and only 5 hours. If I do the 1-6:30 shift then at least Lucy will only be in the house by herself for a few hours before Mam gets in.
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Lucy sighed as she let her hair out of her tight bun, groaning and falling to sit on her couch.
The day has been filled with meeting after meeting, hours of sitting in a chair placed in the corner of the room.
Her father insisted that she take part in every one, otherwise how was she supposed to know how a company was run?
Between that and private tutor sessions that lasted all morning, she was tuckered out.
She kicked off her heels and unbuttoned the top of her shirt, feeling fatigue claim her body.
Lucy wasn't sure she could go on like this much longer, but her father wasn't keen on giving her breaks. The only time she got was the few hours for sleep alone in her apartment. There were no weekends, no sunshine, no amusement.
The gray colorscheme of this life was never the one she wanted. The money, the business, it meant nothing to her.
But where was she going to go? Without her father, she had nothing. There was nothing for her outside of this world, he made sure of that. His business would be succeeded, that was the only care he had.
Another groan passed through her lips as a heavy knock fell on her door. The ache in her legs carried her to answer it, assuming Jude sent a secretary to deliver papers for the next day.
She opened the door with a polite smile, her breath quickly stolen as they made eye contact.
"Hey, Luce," The thick, burly, voice of the man who stood before her sunk into her bones like a well-lit fire. He stood with his hands in his pockets, that familiar white scarf, and his hansomly wide grin. "It took me a while to find ya, sorry I'm late,"
"Natsu," His name was so distant on her tongue, like a dream she had when she was younger.
It felt like that at times, her world before she was forcefully yanked out of it.
She had friends, happiness, a real life any teenager would want.
Every day was eventful, always different and full of laughs. They did everything together, the whole gang inseparable. They were her first real family.
Levy, Erza, Gray, Gajeel, Juvia, and...Natsu. He was more than a friend, and it was too late by the time she realized it.
They were closer than close, together whenever they could be. She remembered the nights where he snuck into her room, bringing in junk food and video games that her father would never allow through the front door.
They called each other if they couldn't meet up, texted in the middle of class when the teacher wasn't looking. She tutored him in the classes he nearly failed, had her maids sneak her into the kitchen so she could make him lunch. She snuck out of the house to meet him, Natsu taking her around every inch of town. They even saved a stray kitten together, his fur an odd blue shade.
When they held hands, hugged, or he slung his arm around ger shoulders, it just felt right. His whole presence seemed to light up her life, warmed her to the center of her soul.
She lost him, them all, when Jude caught the two kissing on the front porch.
They had been out the whole day, on a picnic and watching the cherry blossoms fall. She made a big lunch with Virgo, packed with Natsu’s favorite things. She always loved the way he got so excited over the things she cooked for him.
It was a day like any other, as they spent so many of them together. But his demeanor seemed off when they got to her front door that night. Suddenly he was shy and quiet, blushing and fidgeting.
His words kept getting jumbled and tugged on his scarf at least a hundred times.
In the end, he settled his confession with an abrupt kiss. His hands wrapped around her waist, the sudden movement making her drop the basket.
And for a first kiss, it was a pleasant embrace. His lips were soft and adorable, puckered against her own. Her eyes closed, a dream-like feeling overwhelming her. Maybe that's when reality took its rightful place, maybe it was always just a dream.
Jude opened the door, yelling at Natsu to let her go. He pulled the pink-haired boy off of her, angrily punching him in the nose.
Lucy screamed as she was dragged inside, not able to make sure Natsu was okay.
Her father had him thrown off the property, barring him or anyone else she knew from coming back.
He moved them out of Magnolia before she knew it, before the school year was over, before she could say goodbye.
And just because of a kiss? Surely that was an overreaction for any parent, but this was a special case.
Natsu came from a jaded family, the Dragneels known for their very shady business dealings. His two older brothers stood by his father's side, and ran things on the street. Though no one could ever prove what they were really doing.
A Dragneel would never be good enough for a Heartfilia, he made sure to drill that in her head.
A scandal with that seedy family could mean ruin, it was already bad enough that he allowed them to be friends.
"Natsu," She said again, his name filling up her heart. It took away her soreness, blew away the dark clouds that shrouded her life. His wide spread grin made butterflies rise in her stomach; she never realized how much she missed this feeling.
"Natsu..." He closed the door as he stepped inside, wrapping her up in his arms.
When was the last time she felt so relaxed? Those few years ago when he kissed her, she assumed.
"You still smell so good," He mumbled into her hair, nuzzling his nose against her cheek.
"I missed you so much," She teared up slightly, giggling as he lifted her off her feet and walked them further into her home.
"I missed you too," They both laughed as they fell onto the couch, still tangled in each other's arms.
"What's with the suit?" She asked, smirking as he rolled his eyes.
"Really? Thats your first question? Not how I am or anything normal, weirdo?"
"You always wore hoodies and jeans, don't blame me," She smacked his arm with a small pout.
"It's for work, okay? Duh," He sighed. "Dad insists that I gotta look nice."
"It looks nice on you," She pulled playfully on his tie, Natsu leaning his forehead against hers.
"Its like you never left," He groaned. "Dammit, Luce, its like you never left,"
"I never wanted to leave you," His hands held her face, thumbs rubbing calm circles on her cheek.
"Everyone's been worried sick since, you never called,"
"Father tracks my phone bill," Her chuckle was fitted with annoyance, her fist slightly balled up. "I wanted to,"
"Damn bastard, he's lucky my nose healed," Lucy giggled as he looked away, the blonde gently kissing the ridge.
"What took you so long?" Her lips felt tingly, Natsu's eyes boring into her, as if he could see her soul.
"I had a lot to do before I could come get ya," His voice was suddenly a bit rough, his hands a bit more steady. "I'll take you away, I promised myself I'd come save ya,"
"Really?" Her heart clenched as he nodded, both of them leaning forward.
"I never got to hear what you thought of my kiss," She gulped as he now spoke in a husky whisper. "Do you remember it?"
"Mhm," She felt smothered in a pool of honey, all of her previous worries vanishing with each passing second. Had it felt like this the first time? She only remembered the pain of watching the bloodied Natsu being dragged away by their security team.
Their kiss was gentle at first, like an old memory rising from the dirt of the past. Natsu laid back against the couch, pulling her along with him. His hands stayed cupped on her face, their lips moving in slight sync.
It was a warm embrace that grew as their hunger for more was ignited.
Their kisses became deeper, their hands began to wander and explore each other.
He pulled her tongue into his mouth along with a soft moan, his hands fondling her hips.
"No one taught you how to kiss, right?" Natsu grumbled as he pulled away for a brief moment.
"You're my first and only kiss," Lucy let out a happy gasp as Natsu flipped them over, a slobbering kiss pressed against her cheek.
"Damn right I am," She rolled her eyes and bit her lip as he began to unbutton his shirt, revealing a dragon tattoo that wrapped around his torso.
"I wanna be sure, Luce," She frowned as he stopped at the last button. "I know I showed up outta the blue, but you know what I want. So if you can't come with me, I'll understand. Just know that I'm gonna give you the whole fucking world if you do. I fuckin' love you,"
"You're my soulmate," He purred happily, grinning his signature grin as she began to unbutton her own shirt. "Take me wherever you want, Natsu,"
#fairy tail#nalu#natsu dragneel#lucy heartfilia#natsu and lucy#natsu x lucy#lucy and natsu#lucy x natsu#nalu fanfiction#fairy tail nalu
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Safety Net: Chapter 2
Present! Carol Denning/Reader
It’s been three days since you’ve been at max and it’s been honestly quite awful. You stared at the tray of food in front of you poking at it with your fork instead of eating it, you weren’t hungry and you were restless from not being able to sleep. Who could even sleep here? The lights are on constantly.
“Making art, (L/N)?” you looked up to see who the familiar voice belonged to, it was Piper with her fiancée Alex. Piper was starting to become a little more tolerable now that she was reunited with Alex. You were happy for them and honestly glad to have them here with you even if you were never particularly close with either of them during your time up at camp.
“I don’t know if I’d call it art but it’s something.” you chuckled, continuing picking at the food. “I miss camp, I feel like I'm always on edge here.”
“I definitely agree with that, sleeping with this fuckin broken arm hasn’t been pleasant.” Alex replied as she began eating her food. God, you almost felt nauseous watching someone eat. Food disgusted you right now. “You’re not pulling a Sister Ingalls are you?” Alex asked half jokingly but also sounding a little concerned.
“No, I just haven’t had much of an appetite lately, I feel sick looking at food, it’s probably just my anxiety. Also the food here looks repulsive..” you sighed.
“I don’t blame you, I would feel anxious too if I was sharing a bunk with the head of C-Block.” said Piper.
You turned your head to the left over where Carol was, she was playing cards surrounded by her posse. You and Carol haven’t really spoken much or been around each other since she basically scared you off the other day. It was kind of an unspoken rule, if Carol was in the room you stayed out of her way and hung around somewhere else until she came out which was pretty often since she was mostly out here playing cards. You were so deep in thought you forgot you were still looking in carol’s direction when you snapped back to reality you saw her staring straight at you with an emotionless expression, you quickly looked away.
“She’s actually not that bad, I mean besides telling me to get the fuck out the other day. She’s quiet and clean. except for when she’s looking at those magazines of men, that’s when it gets a little uncomfortable. I feel more sorry for you being bunkmates with Badison, Chapman.” you chuckled as Piper’s eyes rolled hearing her roomie’s name.
“Oh please don’t get her started, it will never end.” Alex groaned, rubbing her temple with her functioning hand.
“She’s giving you trouble?” You asked, actually concerned.
“Trouble doesn’t even begin to describe it. She’s a bully!” Piper exclaimed. “There is something deeply wrong with her.” Piper was normally a pretty dramatic person but you knew she wasn’t exaggerating when she was talking about Badison. You’ve only known Badison for a few days but there really was something wrong with her.
“I think there’s something deeply wrong with everyone here.” Alex replied. “They’re in maximum security for a reason.”
“I wonder what Carol did.” You said thinking out loud. “Everyone obeys her, shit even Badison is scared of her.”
“All I know is that one of her girls, Creech, is my bunkmate and I want no trouble.” Alex said, continuing to eat her food.
“Aw, look at that, all of the new cookies eatin’ together. What is this a fuckin pride parade?” you recognized that god awful bostonian accent, it was Badison as she began to sit down at your table.
“Well you know what they say about us gays, we hang out in flocks.” Alex replied sarcastically. You couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle.
“I would’ve never guessed you were a carpet muncher, Mouse. I guess you learn something new everyday.” said Badison. “I better be careful, don’t want you developing a crush on me or anything.”
“I’m picky with my women, you have nothing to worry about.” Your eyes widened realizing you said that out loud. It would’ve been an awkward silence if it wasn’t for Alex’s small chuckles.
“Oh you’re a funny little thing, now aren't you?” Badison replied, still shocked by what you just said.
“I meant that I'm not really interested in dating while i’m in prison, you know?” you said trying to cover your ass for what you just said.
“I got what you meant.” Badison said slowly coming closer to you. “You should really be more careful with who you smart off too though. Don’t wanna start off on the wrong foot with anyone here. Remember what I said on your first day. We can make you want to live or die.” Badison whispered and walked her way over towards Carol.
“I’m so fucked.” You said worryingly.
“Badison’s not gonna do shit, she just wants to scare you two.” Alex said, trying to comfort you.
You nodded. You looked over your shoulder once more to see Badison next to Carol as she played a card game with the other girls. You couldn’t help but feel a small pit of worry in your stomach.
Later that evening a few hours before lights out, you decided to go take a shower, something you had been avoiding for the past few days. It’s not that you were unhygienic, it's just you had been slightly depressed from the big transition of moving from up the hill to down the hill.
You took a quick look around the shower room, thank god it was empty. Empty showers were a rarity in any prison.
It was when you were washing your hair that you heard a couple of footsteps walking in. Well, that was a nice five minutes of peace and quiet. You ignored it and continued to rinse the shampoo out of your hair. Suddenly, you felt an arm wrap around your chest and something pointy and sharp being pressed against your right jugular.
“If you scream, I swear to god I will push this into your neck. You got that?” You nodded trying to hold back your tears. The arms around you flip you over and you’re faced to see two of Badison’s friends Eckelcamp and Teng.
“What did I do?” you asked quietly and shakily, almost choking trying to hold back your tears. You’ve mostly kept to yourself this whole time here, actively trying to avoid any trouble, you certainly don’t remember doing anything to these two. This is the first time you’ve even spoken to them.
“You disrespected Badison, bitch.” Eckelcamp said, still extremely close to your face. She wrapped her hand around your neck tightly with the shiv still firmly pressed against your neck. You were barely able to breathe. “Next time Badison talks to you, have some fucking manners.” she said slamming your back hard against the shower wall. You did your best to hold back a yelp. Getting stabbed in the neck with a dirty shiv was not the move for today.
“Next time you see her, apologize.” said Teng, “We’ll be watching. Let’s get out of here before a CO comes.”
Eckelcamp nodded in agreement and looked at you once more and yanked your hair pulling you down to the hard wet tile of the bathroom and left.
You waited till you heard their footsteps disappear to crawl into a ball and sob under the now cold running water of the shower. So this is what Badison meant when she said live or die. Your hands gently rubbed your possibly bruised neck. You finished your shower and got dressed before anyone walked in and saw you like this.
Once you returned to the common room, your eyes scanned the room for Badison. You looked over at Carol’s table, her usual spot but she was absent. You met eyes with Eckelcamp and Teng. Ignoring them you made your way to Badison and Piper’s cell. You really hated the fact that you were being practically forced to apologize to her but this bitch was not worth a stab in the neck with a dirty shiv.
Once you got to the cell you saw Badison laying on her bunk and Piper in hers reading a book. You lightly knocked on the open door.
“Hey, (L/N).” Piper said smiling but her smile quickly faded almost as if she could sense something not right with you.
“Hey, Chapman.” you smiled trying to not seem suspicious, as much as you liked Piper she had a tendency to involve herself in situations that she didn’t belong in.
“The fuck do you want, Mouse?” Badison asked sarcastically as she laid up from her bunk. She knew exactly what the fuck you wanted.
“I was wondering if I could have a word with you.” You asked. “Out here. In Private.”
“Whatever you need to say you can say it here with me and Gapman.”
“Please, Badison.” You were trying to hide the impatience in your voice. Piper was already looking at you suspiciously.
“Only because you said please.” Badison said she climbed down her bunk making her way out the bunk.
You walked over under the stairs. “I wanted to formally apologize to you for disrespecting you.” You said trying to sound sincere.
“I see you met Eckelcamp and Teng.” She chuckled looking at your neck. “Oh, those are gonna be some ugly bruises tomorrow.”
“It’s not like I have anyone to look beautiful for here.” you said rubbing your neck.
“Aw, you don’t wanna look pretty for your lesbo girlfriends.” Badison said, as she made a pouty face.
“You mean Chapman and Vause? Just because we’re gay doesn’t mean we’re dating eachother.” You were actually confused. Was she actually that dumb?
“What?” She looked visibly confused. “Anyway, That was a shitty apology.”
“What do you want from me, Badison?” You said already fed up.
“I don’t like you. I can look past that though if you fill up my commissary for the next two weeks. Don’t be stingy with me, (L/N). I know you got plenty of money.” She said with that sleazy fucking smile.
“Fine, deal.” You really didn’t want to do this but you also didn’t want anymore trouble with Badison or the rest of Carol’s gang.
“I accept your apology.” Badison said.
As you were about to turn around to leave you felt Badison’s foot slide under yours causing you to trip and fall hard on the ground. You heard Badison let out a loud laugh. You could feel your eyes well up with tears again and this time you didn’t even bother to stop them from flowing. Let them see you cry, you didn’t care anymore.
“Oops.” Badison said as she continued to laugh.
“(L/N), are you okay?” You heard Piper's voice as she tried to help you up. You must have hit the floor hard enough if Piper heard you fall from her cell.
“I’m fine, Chapman. Just go, don’t make this worse for the both of us.” You snapped as you stood up from the ground. You wanted to yelp from the shock of pain that shot through your body.
You looked over to see everyone at Carol’s table laughing, except for Carol. Your red puffy tear filled eyes locked with hers for a second. You looked away embarrassed. You hurried as fast as you could up the stairs to your cell. You wanted to lay down and hope you woke up from this fucking nightmare.
As soon as you reached your cell you climbed to the top bunk and crawled up into a small ball and just sobbed. You hated being seen as weak here. You didn’t like giving these people that power over you but you couldn’t help it. You were so wrong on your first day, you were finally beginning to crack. You weren’t sure how long you were crying but your sobs finally turned to small sniffles.
“You new cookies really do crumble quickly.” You heard that stern cold voice say. You lifted your head up to meet eyes with Carol. This is the second time she’s ever actually spoken to you. You quickly wiped your tears away. “Are you gonna say something or are you just gonna keep looking at me all pitiful?” Carol said as she leaned against the wall of the cell with her arms crossed.
“I don’t really have anything to say.” You continued to sniffle. “At least not without having to worry about getting shanked in the shower.”
“Oh, so that explains your neck.” Carol chuckled.
Damn was it really that noticeable already?
“I thought you would’ve known, your girls are the ones who did it.” You replied with a slight attitude putting your head back down.
“Whatever Badison has the other girls do has nothing to do with me.” Carol replied.
“I’ve been here for three days and you’ve never bothered to speak to me. Why the sudden change?” You asked.
“Am I bothering you?” Carol replied almost as if she was slightly offended.
“No, you’re not. Sorry, that sounded a lot ruder than it did in my head.” You rubbed your eyes, Please don’t beat my ass. You prayed. You had enough ass beatings for the rest of your sentence.
“I’m talking to you because I believe you have potential, (L/N).” Carol said with a slight smirk.
“Potential?” You asked, confused. What the hell does she mean by that?
“I want you to work for me. I can tell you’re smarter than most of these other girls here. It also makes sense considering the fact that we are sharing a cell together.” Carol said. She did have a point. Carol was not someone to be enemies with.
“I mean I guess. Look Carol, I’m just trying to keep my nose clean, do my time and-“
“And what? Avoid getting in any trouble? What happens if you get into another disagreement with another inmate and she starts a fight with you? You’re gonna get fed up with being someone’s punching bag and you’ll fight back. The COs aren’t going to see it as self defense. They’ll happily throw you into the SHU and add more time onto your sentence. Stick by me and I’ll make sure Badison or any other girls never lay a finger on you.” Carol did make a good point. “See me as a type of safety net, if you will.”
“Can you give me time to think about it?” You asked not sure if you would be able to do it.
“The offer is off the table then. Continue getting your ass beat. It’s not hurting me.” Carol said, trying to hide her annoyance.
You sat and thought about it for a minute. You knew you weren’t going to be able to just continue getting beat on. You were going to break at some point. You looked up at Carol and took a deep breath in.
“Okay, I’ll do it.” You had three years left on your sentence, that’s not a lot of time, you could do this.
“Shake on it.” Carol said coming up to you with her hand out.
You looked at her, a small smile forming at the corners of your lips. “Okay, boss.” You said as you shook her hand.
“Sit down here kid, I’m gonna show you how to play Bridge.” Carol said sitting on her bed as she began to shuffle a deck of cards.
“Bridge? Is that the game you’re always playing?” you asked as you slowly began to crawl off the top bed. Trying to ignore the pain in your sore arms and legs.
“Yep, It’s best I teach you now, you’re going to be playing a lot of it.” Carol said, laying out the cards in front of you as you sat down. “Shall we begin?”
What the hell am I getting myself into. You thought to yourself as you watched Carol explain bridge to you.
Chapter 3 here
#OITNB#Orange is the new black#orange is the new black fanfic#fanfics#carol denning x reader#carol denning#carol denning/reader
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