Went to a new doctor today. She's skinny. Of course she saw me and diagnosed me fat immediately. Mentioned cholesterol and diabetes and thyroid issues three times and ordered same day blood work. And on top of that she looked into my mouth and just decided to tell me that I should look into seeing a dentist. Like EXCUSE me??? You are not q dentist you have no right to shame me when my teeth are fine??? I don't understand why she felt the need to make me self conscious over something she has ABSOLUTELY NO EXPERTISE IN.

This is why I hate doctors but ESPECIALLY skinny doctors. They don't give two shits about you, they don't care how healthy you are they see weight that isn't stick figure, diagnose you with fat and won't hear any other problems you might have without telling you to lose weight first which is BULLSHIT and all the studies now are saying we have been thinking about weight wrong and the healthiness of your body is not weight-controlled.

Anyways I'm switching to a heavier doctor that my sister has whose nice and actually cares, but I spent an already anxiety-filled time at the doctor masking my fucking heart out and getting my blood drawn and having to on top of that come out feeling ugly and like I don't take care of myself.

To any of you who might be getting your doctor degrees or whatever, stop fucking treating fat people like we don't have feelings. Stop treating us like we are ugly horrible people. And for fucks sake mind your fucking business when it comes to information you know Jack Shit about. Stay in your own goddamned lane.

i have this fear that a nurse is going to come into my room with a flash light and shine it in my face while i sleep. i am afraid that if i close my door i will be yelled at. i am afraid that i will hear a knock from a nurse on the other side of the bathroom door when I shower. sometimes i think i hear somone (a nurse) knocking, footsteps, the click of a flashlight, or somone unlocking my door and i freeze with fear waiting for them to appear and that ill be back there.

i love how we explained my entire medical history to these doctors and they still think i’m fine???? the cardiologist i saw SIX MONTHS AGO didn’t do ANYTHING so i’ve been left with no answers for six fucking months and they still think i’m fine like my mom is literally at work and she was very upset that they were just letting me go and then lied about my heart rate being 130 when i got here it was 150-160 yes it did go down a bit but how are they gonna just discharge me like that they said to come back if my heart rate gets high like that again but what are they gonna do if it does get high like that again the same fucking shit they’re doing rn fuck i hate the medical field sometimes

tbh tbh i really hate being afab and a poc and having a shit ton of medical issues bcos i’ll go to the doctor and tell them. hey something’s wrong like my body is tensing up etc. etc. and they just don’t. take me seriously.

had a doctor's appointment today 😞

my obgyn recommended me some books and podcasts on healthy eating to manage my pcos symptoms and the guy who does them has a section of his wikipedia page dedicated to controversy over whether he’s pedalling pseudoscience 😭

Yep I hate doctors. I don't think it's normal to want to break down crying in the middle of visits.

People act like I'm so annoying for self diagnosing myself, but guess who's been right and gotten a professional diagnosis every single time!

Silence in the library

A speedpaint video of this will be available at my Patreon on february 1st!

WHY HE COULDN'T BE THIS HAPPY THROUGHOUT THE WHOLE DAMN SHOW.

eleven is fascinating to me because he came right off the back of tens horrible traumatic breakdown after he lost everything and he immediately tried to establish himself as the opposite of that. he is funny and goofy and almost childlike, and he bulldozes on in his adventures with amy like nothing happened at all. but then something happens and his masks slips and it's like oh! the core of this man is still anger. he is so so angry all of the time and this façade is the only thing stopping him from being consumed by it. he isn't over any of it and he hasn't moved on. he is wearing a fez and laughing but under that all that exists is age old anger and grief and it is going to consume him

... thinking about that episode when House forces Wilson to buy furniture for their apartment because House wants to prove a point to Wilson. he wants to make Wilson realize that he dosent know who he is. he dosent know what he wants. so Wilson goes to the store, he spends the whole day there infact. wandering isles trying out different chairs and inspecting tables. for a moment he thinks house might be right, he dosent know what he wants. but by the end of the episode do you know what wilson bought. do you know what he decided he wants. a piano. he bought a piano. he dosent even play piano. but House does. he knew House would like it. he bought it FOR House. HE BOUGHT IT BECAUSE THATS WHAT HE WANTS. HE WANTS HOUSE-

my mutual on twitter showed me a photo of jodie whittaker with short hair and my life was changed forever

In todays episode of where is that stabbing pain comming from?

It's either:

Afab

Coincidence

Stress

Or yet another undiagnosed illness that has to be fixed by operation before it causes permanent damage

would you believe that this does actually have context. anyways here’s the master in teletubby land

thinking about lord president fivey so have this