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#dr house
irlplasticlamb · 22 hours
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hand in unloveable hand.
prints + merch + commission info
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they fell asleep watching the L Word
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pinguplanet · 3 days
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when they guy that bails you is as crazy as you
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balmy-moss · 1 day
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the meme without a joke .
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Why is Gregory house from the hit show House MD always doing the Kubrick stare
And tell me why it’s kinda attractive…
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wildweinerbug · 1 day
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eric foreman, the love of my life, save me from the yaoi
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bonelesssboiz · 24 hours
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pinched a nerve in my inner thigh and now I’m hobbling around campus like Dr House. Like if Dr House took more meds and cared about science education . We are both bisexual !
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comicwritesstuff · 3 days
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okay this is so incredibly specific so please feel free to ignore BUT i’ve been wanting to read a fic for ages where the reader is Chase’s childhood best friend from Australia and she moves to New Jersey for a fresh start. She’s staying with Chase while she gets settled, and one day she comes to visit him at lunch at the hospital, where she ends up meeting House and he’s… intrigued by her 👀 either romantic or smut would be so very cool :^D <33 💐
YES. I LOVE THIS PROMPT IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG BUT IM FINISHED!!!
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Gregory House x Fem!Chases bsf!Reader
Warnings: None really, just cussing and tooth rotting fluff >:) 3k+ words.
Chase's POV: 
“Well I was just wondering if we could go out sometime, I think you're really-” My attention shifted as y/n's call lit up my phone, interrupting the conversation. It was a more pressing matter than pursuing a one-night stand.
“Excuse me for a moment.” I say walking away, the woman having an annoyed look on her face. 
I answer the phone.
“Hello, y/n? Whats up” 
“Chase! Long time no talk haha.”
“You called me yesterday.”
“Learn to take a joke, anyways, I have some exciting news for you.”
“I’m moving to New Jersey!!” 
“Wait what? Really?”
“Yeah, I kinda forgot to tell you and i'm actually at the airport right now, so I hope you aren't busy tomorrow so you can pick me up.”
“Wow, um alright, yeah I can pick you up, do you have a place to stay?"
“Um…no…” I sigh, “Just stay at mine for now.”
“Don't even with the sigh i’ve known you my whole life you can put the nightly hookups on hold for your best friend.” 
I smirk and shake my head, “Yeah yeah, I’ll see ya tomorrow y/n” 
Y/N’s POV:
I smile as I hang up with Chase, grabbing my luggage and pulling it along the airport. Ahh yes, crying babies, rushed parents, annoying couples and that one insanely attractive person you see for a split second, I love the airport. 
Glancing at my ticket I realize I might have to hurry to make it to the gate, speed walking I see a text from chase, “Have a safe flight.” Let's hope so. 
Time skip (to lazy to write all the details about fucking airports)
Relaxing on a 21-hour flight proved challenging, especially with a toddler nearby. It was unclear whether the toddler would be a source of annoyance or just be tolerable. The flight just started. So to entertain myself I decide to do some digging about Chase's job, he brags about it all the time and the infamous Dr Gregory House. To be honest I thought Chase was gay for a little while with how much he talks about him. Still speculating. 
The plane lifts off and I start my look, at first just looking up Gregory House, a surprising amount of things show up. An article titled, “Gregory House, Talented Doctor? Or a lying Narcissist?” Oh well that's a good first impression.   
Scrolling down I see another article, “The world's greatest doctor, and his deepest secrets” 
Now that's enticing. I click on it only to find out his deepest secrets, including using 3 in one shampoo and how his leg got hurt. I guess people hardly know anything about him. I click on the photos of him, there's only a couple, most of them blurry but to be honest he's pretty good looking from the photos I can see. I’d honestly be gay for him if I was Chase. 
The toddler next to me starts giggling, I glance at her and notice her staring at a picture of House. She's kicking her feet too. That's so relatable. 
For the rest of the flight I find some stuff about this guy named Taub, who somehow also figured out that he cheated on his wife which is why he had to quit. How did I find that out? I took a coding class in 8th grade. (I got lucky) 
Lisa Cuddy the Dean of Medicine, unfortunately only good stuff about her, boring. 
Remy Hadley, oddly, can't find anything on her. 
Eric Foreman, his brothers in jail, fun. 
And the others are just as boring. For the remainder of the flight, the toddler proved surprisingly chill. I passed the time by binge-watching random movies I had downloaded earlier
*Another time skip to plane landing* 
Finally, 21 hours on a fucking plane is horrible. 
I check my phone after I take it off airplane mode, seeing a text from chase a couple minutes ago. 
“I’m at the airport, is your flight done?”
“Yep, wya.”
“I’m parked in the front.”
“That's specific” 
“There's no other front dumbass”
I roll my eyes at his text, and get off the plane as soon as I can. I walk out and see Chase standing outside his car waiting for me. His eyes light up as he spots me, and a grin spreads across his face. Unable to resist, I rush forward and envelop him in a bear hug.
“Man you’re a lot uglier in person” 
I say jokingly, smirking.
“Oh shut up”  
We climbed into his car, and he drove us back to his apartment. When we arrive he helps get my crap into the house, before he gets a call saying he had to head to work. 
Eventually a week or two passes, I've gotten more comfortable in his apartment, applied for a bunch of jobs, and looked for places to stay so I’m not invading his “man” space anymore. Unfortunately there aren't a lot of options, and no jobs have replied to my applications, which is weird since im overqualified, it's almost like they aren’t even getting my applications in the first place. 
I’m doing the dishes when I get a text from Chase.
“Hey, I left my wallet on the counter, so I don’t have money for food, could ya bring it for me?” 
“Nah”
“See you soon”
I breathe out a laugh and grab his wallet, putting a coat on then driving to the hospital. 
When I get there I walk in, looking around before I call Chase, “Where do I go this place is huge” I can hear talking in the background, actually more like arguing. “Uhm just wait at the entrance i’ll be right there.” He says in a whisper.
He hangs up so I just stand there awkwardly waiting, that was a weird ass phone call. To be fair Chase is a weird ass guy with weird ass coworkers so what do I expect at this point. 
Before I see Chase I see Dr Gregory House, limping quickly towards me. And damn he’s even hotter in person than the pictures I saw of him. 
“Hey, no time to explain, you need to come with me.” He grabs my arm dragging me into the elevator. Before it closes I see Chase come out of the stairway, he sprints towards the elevator but it closes. I hear him trying to say something, but it's muffled and I can’t understand it. Wait why the fuck did I even follow House? 
“You're real compliant, you’d make a great hooker.” 
I turn around and side eye him.
“Thanks, so would you.” I say giving a fake smile. 
“Speaking of compliant, why did you drag me away from Chase? What's going on?’’
“I made a bet with Chase.”
“That's really specific and helpful thanks” 
“Oh yeah no problem” 
Sarcastic asshole. 
“If you don’t tell me, I'll stop following you and go with Chase.” 
He rolls his eyes.
“Fine, Mom! The bet is that I can convince you to work as my assistant here.”
“Really? That's it? I need a job. Why would Chase even bet against that?” 
“He thinks you’ll fall in love with me so he doesn’t want that to happen, in his words, “She has a thing for homeless looking, narcissistic assholes with beards.” So he’s trying to prevent it, and he’s sure he can.”  
Damn- I feel so called out. I stay silent before nodding.
“Well to be honest he isn’t wrong.” 
I see House smirk before we get out of the elevator, he hobbles and leads me to his office, locking the door then having me sit down. 
As I sit down in front of his desk, he grabs a ball and starts throwing it against the wall, while sitting down. 
“So are you gonna interview me or something?” 
“Yeah, I’m just waiting for Chase to get back up here so he can watch me interview you.” 
He really is an asshole…it's kinda hot though. 
“Fair enough.” 
We wait a bit before Chase comes jogging up to the door, out of breath, he’s clearly been running plenty. He starts banging on the glass door that House previously locked.
“House!! Y/N! Let me in! This isn’t fair!” He exclaims, House is grinning when he leans over his desk, crossing his arms.
“Okay! Let’s start this interview now.” 
“Y/n! You traitor!” 
Did I abandon my childhood best friend for some disabled doctor? No, I did it for the job. At least that's what I'm telling myself.   
Turning my attention back to House instead of the Australian cry baby outside the door, he asks me, “First question, do you want the job of being my assistant?” 
“Obviously”
“Great! You have the job!” 
I mean, easy enough. I smile and shake my head. This hospital really has some unique people. 
House shakes my hand, grinning as Chase is sitting on the floor defeated outside. 
As the days turned into weeks at Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, I got to know everyone. Cuddy had to actually approve of me working as House’s assistant first, but once she saw a…normal enough individual, she welcomed me into the environment.
Getting to know House better, I found myself drawn to him in ways I hadn’t really expected. The bet between House and Chase, Chase thinking I would fall for House, I took it as a joke, until that joke turned more into reality. 
Despite House being a narcissistic piece of shit, there were small moments that I saw, or shared with him that made me fall for him. Ones where he seemed happy, or just easy to be around. At work he's serious but when Wilson dragged him out to bars, or other social environments, he could actually be fun. And though him being a dick is undeniably attractive sometimes, when he was…”himself” that's how I began to fall for him.  
One day, after an especially tough day for the team, and being forced to go break into houses and get coffee and food, I found myself alone with House in his office. The rest of the team had left, leaving us in a rare moment alone with each other. As I glanced up from the medical chart of the most recent patient, I caught House’s gaze lingering on me, his blue eyes intense and unreadable. 
“Something on your mind, House?” I asked, attempting to break the awkward silence between us. 
He smirked, leaning back in his chair with a casual ease, “Oh just wondering why a catch like yourself doesn’t have a boyfriend, or husband?” He responds, his tone laced with flirtatiousness.
I couldn’t help but chuckle at his response, a faint blush on my cheeks. House and I had gained an uncanny camaraderie, made from me running around doing everyone's paperwork, being the designated “you get to tell patients they are dying!!” person. And as you’d expect people didn’t respect me a lot, but if someone was blatantly mean to me, House would step in and destroy their self esteem in a second and walk away like it meant nothing. That's another thing that I think made me fall for him. 
“Believe me, I’ve been asking myself that a lot too.” I smile, placing the medical chart on his desk. 
“Do you want a boyfriend? Or girlfriend, or a pet or something.” He quips, his eyes looking like they are reading me, studying my every movement and reaction to what he’s saying, it's flattering and uncomfortable at the same time. 
“A boyfriend would be nice.” I say reassuringly, a laugh escaping me as I shake my head in amusement.
“Alright let's say *hypothetically* I asked you out. *hypothetically* what would your response be?” 
Raising an eyebrow I ask, “Are you trying to go on a date with me?”
“I said hypothetically, now answer the question.” 
A smirk plays on my lips as I roll my eyes in a mock annoyance. 
“Well.” I say, “Hypothetically, I would say yes.” 
“Great, meet me for dinner at (some random fancy place idk u make up a name i'm too lazy to), wear something cute.” 
 With that, he sauntered out of the office, leaving me to think about what just happened. Glancing at the clock, I realized I had just enough time to get ready for our “hypothetical date.” 
The anticipation bubbled within me, standing outside (IDK A RESTAURANT NAME IT), waiting for House to arrive. My heart raced with nervous excitement, unsure what to expect from a…unique…guy like House. I had used all the time I had to work on my outfit, settling for a simple dress (or suit, or just anything you're comfy in :) ). 
As I scanned the busy street, searching for any sign of House, I heard the obnoxiously loud sound of a motorcycle approaching. House rode in, parking his bike before getting off and walking (limping) towards me. My breath caught in my throat as I saw him, he looked impossibly handsome, in a tailored suit that made his rugged charm come out, good god he looked fine. 
“Y/n,” he greeted with a warm smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners in genuine affection. “That outfit makes your ass look nice.” 
I scoff playfully, hitting his arm. “So much for acting like a gentleman, at least you look like one.” 
He chuckled, offering me his arm in a more gentlemanly gesture. “Yeah yeah, shall we?” 
With a nod, I looped my arm through his, savoring the warmth of his touch as we mad our way into the restaurant. The ambiance was elegant and inviting, with a soft candlelight casting a warm glow over the decor. 
As we were seated at a table in a quiet corner of the restaurant, I couldn’t help but feel a flutter of excitement in my chest. I’m finally going out with House, damn Chase was totally right. 
Throughout the evening, our conversation flowed surprisingly easily between us. I had half expected him to be rude or stuck up, but he seemed actually interested in me, in my life. He was asking questions, laughing and joking with me. Sharing stories of his own, and treating me like an actual human. Honestly it was scaring me a bit, but it was making me fall harder for him. 
House raised an eyebrow, a playful glint in his eyes. ‘So, tell my Y/N. What’s the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you?” 
I laughed, shaking my head as I thought about the memory. “Well, there was this one time in college-” 
“Let me guess,” House interrupted, a smirk playing on his lips. “It involved copious amounts of alcohol and very questionable decisions?” 
I chuckle and nod in agreement. “You could say that. Long story short, I ended up streaking through the campus fountain at three in the morning. I'm pretty sure Chase might still have a video of it still.”
House raises an eyebrow, an amused laugh coming from him. “I wish I could say I was surprised, oh and also. I am finding that video.” He states, with a determined and mischievous grin. 
The dinner continues and our connection just seems to get stronger, fueled by shared laughter, stories of shit Wilson and him did in college, things Chase and I did in highschool. With each passing moment, I found myself more and more under House’s spell, captivated by the complexity of himself, his character. His gaze, laughter, even his personality. Maybe it was the wine or something, but House was being nice, he had charisma, and was being attractive in general.  
I don’t even realize that we’ve spent almost three hours in the restaurant just talking. I check my phone seeing that it's 9:30 already. We had got and paid the check awhile ago, but had stayed to talk longer. The restaurant closes at 10, and I felt a sudden pang of disappointment that our date was close to being over with. I didn’t want it to end, I was savoring this moment I was having, this seemingly perfect night. 
When the waiter arrived to take our dessert order, I couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment that the evening was drawing to a close. I wasn't ready for it to end—I wanted to savor every moment, to prolong the magic of our time together for as long as possible.
House notices my look of disappointment, “I’m aware how amazing I am, but if its up to me, this won’t be our last date.” 
A smile tugs at the corners of my mouth, my cheeks heating up as I blush. The butterflies in my stomach going absolutely insane. 
So with a quick glance around the restaurant, I rose from my seat, House grabbed my hand as he led me towards the exit. 
Stepping out into the cool night air, I felt a sense of happiness coursing through me. This was it, the beginning of a new relationship, a surprisingly healthy one so far. 
As House’s hand tightened around mine, his touch sent sparks of electricity coursing through my veins. I knew now that maybe Chase knows me better than I know myself, in all fairness he predicted this, but right now I wasn’t afraid to admit this, to admit the undeniable attraction that I had towards Dr Gregory House. 
His touch leaves mine, his hand pulling as we stand in front of the restaurant, close to each other, staring in each other's eyes. I glance at his lips before leaning in, pressing a soft kiss to his lips, not sure if he expected it, but I pull back.
“Goodnight House. I’ll see you tomorrow.” And with that I walk away, to my car. When I get in my car, I look in the mirror, seeing House standing there with a lovestruck grin, one a child would have over some school crush. But it was cute, he was cute. And this was just the beginning of an annoyingly predicated relationship with a Vicodin addicted, asshole, who I suspect has a soft spot for me.
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carnalgarnish · 22 hours
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Wdym he's a literal murderer? That's so fucked up how could someone ever do something like t-
The murderer:
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nvm nvm nvm nvm🫃🙇‍♂️
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gimmeabraig · 1 month
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house md is awesome
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lovelenivy · 5 months
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mouse bites™
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!! NOW AVAILABLE IN MY SHOP !!
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there's a sale going on atm so get em for a couple dollars less !
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cowboylexapro · 2 months
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look at my doctors dawg im gonna die
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balmy-moss · 2 days
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house holding Winton overwatch like it’s his prized possession
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dactesup · 2 months
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MY doctor ☝️🤞
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