#i think it also feels a bit like... focusing so much on just getting the confession and the sex scene is the exact opposite of
Text
4Me 4Me - Matt sturniolo
♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱
♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱
Summary: completely ghosting your ex boyfriend definitely helped you get over him…right ??
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI !!!, use of alcohol, weed, and nicotine, language, tiny bit of smut, switch!matt x Switch!reader, uses of pet names (baby, honey, sweetheart, pretty girl), not proof read, lmk if I missed anything
Word count: 5.8k
You and Matt dated for a year and ended up on bad terms due to your jealous toxic behavior and Matt’s possessiveness. For the first 2 months of the break up yall stayed in contact and still acted like a couple until you got a fucking grip and completely ghosted him on the 3rd month. You started going out a lot more and making new friends even flirted with a couple guys but nothing was truly helping that bit of emptiness that you still felt without Matt.
It’s now been 10 months since you and Matt broke up and 8 months since you’ve completely cut contact. You stopped going out as much you really just focusing on yourself and fixing your bad behaviors making yourself a bit cold and distant with everyone in your life, your friend even calling you “heartless” at one point. And maybe also you know tattoo therapy….
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Tara invited me to her party that’s tonight and of course I said yes, it’s been a while since I’ve seen her or even went to a party period.
Its was currently 8pm and I’m contemplating going now that I’ve been staring at myself in the mirror or a bit to long
“Yeah no I can’t wear a dress”
Everything about it was just unflattering and too feminine I change into some baggy dark wash jeans with one of those black rave star halter tops that literally only covers your boobs and the rest of it is straight up string
I accessories with a black BEBE belt , black and white tie dye beanie, studded cuff bracelets, and to finish off the look some black and white DC shoes. I also make sure to lift my thong a tad bit so you could see it poking out of my waistband
“Okay now I feel better”
I definitely started dressing less fem and more masc over these couple months but honestly it’s a nice change I personally think it’s made my style better
I check the time it’s 8:30pm and my Uber should be here in 5 minutes. I grab my phone, my vape, my penjamin, and my house keys. Lock the door and happily go outside and get in my Uber
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Pulling up to Tara’s party you got a bit of a qweezie feeling in your stomach but just brush it off texting Tara letting her know your here and step out of the car thanking the Uber then head inside.
It was loud and surprisingly dark you try to look around and see if you recognized anyone…..JAKE ! It was always easy to spot him due to his height. You head in the direction of Jake but also looking around to see if you know anyone else, you see Tana in the distance with her bf, Johnnie awkwardly standing next to Sam while he talks to Colby. It was nice to see your friends again you couldn’t lie you missed being out like this.
You finally get to Jake lightly tugging on his jacket for him to notice you, Jake looks down in confusion but breaks into a smile once he sees you
“Y/NNNNN nice to see that you escaped prison” he chuckles and embraces you into a hug
“Please don’t make me seem like a criminal Infront of people that don’t know me” chuckles “but thank you I really have Tara to thank though, speaking of her where is she ?”
“I actually do not know but maybe the bar knowing her”
Chuckles “yeah you’re right”
You turn in the direction of the bar and sure enough you see her tiny self
“God damn y/n how many tattoos did you get within these past couple months, your more covered than me”
You look around confused for a second then realized you never posted about your tattoos when you got them
“Oh shit right dude honestly um I thinkkkk twenty, cause I have 28 in total right now and when we meet I only had 8”
“Your crazy”
“Says you you also have a fuck ton of tattoos”
“Yeah but mine are small patch work you’res is like HUGE”
“If you think any of these are huge then you should see my most recent tattoo it goes down my whole leg”
“Your actually insane now go see Tara cause she has something for you”
He lightly pushes the small of your back in the direction of the bar which you moved heading to where Tara is your anxiety spiking for some reason you take a hit of your vape and continue
Tara sees you coming her way and started squealing in excitement and runs to hug you and you hug her back of course
“Ughhh you don’t know how much I’ve missed you you really went all ghost on everyone for so long” she looks you up and down “like look at these tattoos most of these weren’t here a while go” she chuckles “you look so hot though maybeeee might get a guys number you neverrrr know”
You laugh at her teasing blushing a little bit
“Nono I’m really not here for that I just want to have a good time you know that”
“Hehe okay we’ll take a shot with me pleaseeee”
“Just one”
“Three”
“Two”
“Fine two”
“Give me a chaser bro I am not taking these straight”
Tara laughs handing you her Diet Coke “Go first”
I throw back both of the shots then chug down the coke
“Uhhh fuck I hate alcohol so much”
You Take a hit of your vape and pen
“Smoking is also bad for you, you know”
“Yes but I much rather kill my lungs then my liver thank you very much, also Jake said you have something for me what is it”
“Oh yeah um it’s not a gift or anything but more like someone gave me this to give back to you, open your hand”
You give Tara your hand while she places something in it
“Promise me not to get upset”
“I can’t promise anything Tara but I won’t make a big deal out of it”
“Okay”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
She moves her hand, it’s a ring and bracelet…. Matt’s ring and bracelet that I gave him when we first started dating.
“Well that sucks it’s the one thing I wasn’t expecting coming from him, give it back to him they’re his not mine”
“Give it to him yourself y/n it’s been 8 months”
“Yeah I guess right…”
Tara smiles a little
“Okay well let’s not worry about that now let’s have fun”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Nick pov
“MATT YOURE COMING INSIDE”
“NO IM NOT I BROUGHT YOU AND CHRIS HERE NOW GET OUT”
“I’m tired of your depressed self you never have fun, ever since y/n broke up with you, you’ve been MISERABLE and I’m tired of it, it’s been 8 months officially, tighten the fuck up and get over it”
“Matt you even got ready JUST GO IN you act like we’re gonna see y/n, I tell you all the time that women has CHANGED for the better at that. she doesn’t go out anymore she’s a homebody and on her work grind dude”
“I don’t understand why you still talk to her”
“She didn’t want too for the longest but I made her stay my friend cause I didn’t wanna lose a good friend cause of my brothers possessives and his own problem’s”
“She also had things wrong with her”
“NO SHIT MATTTTTTT SHES THE ONE WHO NOTICED THAT AND DECIDED TO END IT”
“Matt come on dude you’ll be with us the whole time”
“I do not wanna go”
“You are not about to miss ANOTHER Tara yummy party now get your ass out of the car, NICK GRAB HIM”
I hop out of car and open the driver door and pull Matt out the car while Chris pushes him out, Matt is extremely pissed off
“OKAY JUST GET THE FUCK OFF ME”He straightens himself out
“Okay we can go inside yall are so annoying”
“Wait Matt where is your ring and bracelet?”
“I guess I just forgot them”
“You fucking idiot”
I could tell he was lying it’s not hard to tell he always wears them and he was fidgeting with his hands way to much
My phone vibrated in my pocket it was from y/n
“Nick are you at Tara’s party ?”
“About to go in why !?”
“Im coming outside”
“WAIT YOURE HERE ?!?!?”
“Um yeah Tara invited me??”
“Stay inside”
“Now why the fuck would you tell me to stay inside?”
I look up from my phone to see y/n coming towards us with a confused look on her face
“Oh fuck”
My eyes dart to the side looking at matt for the second, she turns her head to look at him then tilts her head
“Oh That’s why, well I came to give you Matts bracelet and ring back but since he’s here”
She walks to him and places Matt’s bracelet and ring in his hand
“Next time don’t send someone else to do your dirty work Matthew I know you’re not weak like that”
“Y/n I-“
“You don’t have to explain yourself Matt I don’t need to know, it was good see you three, I’ll be going inside now if you’ll excuse me”
We watched as y/n walked back inside
“Now if I must say y/n has only gotten more attractive, holy fuck even the way she composed herself”
“Chris shut the fuck up” I start “well is that what you wanted Matt”
“Her tattoos…holy fuck”
“Oh my god your not even paying attention”
“I am I am but what the hell why did she only get more attractive and I’ve gotten less”
“Your not ugly your a very handsome boy”
“Yes a very attractive young man”
“Okay yeah but COMPARED TO THAT no dude I just fumbled”
“I mean not really yall where toxic asf nearing the end of it”
“Yeah but she’s changed”
“And you haven’t soooo let’s move on with this conversation and get THE FUCK inside please and thank you”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Y/n pov
I run back inside to find tara and grab her by the arm
“Matt is here I ran into him by accident”
“Girl huh how?”
“Nick told me he was outside so I went to give him Matt’s stuff but he was literally right there I just gave Matt his stuff of course but I spoke to him but I feel like I was super harsh with it”
“Girl breathe… talk to him literally what is the harm it’s been 8 months I’m sure he would understand also it’s not like you like him still”
Bats eyelashes blank stare
“Oh you’ve gotta be kidding me y/n”
“IM JOKING IM JOKING but I do wanna apologize to him for everything cause it was mostly my fault”
“Okay but wasn’t he like overly possessive”
“Yeah… but I always pushed his boundaries with that shit and was always insecure and made him not have any privacy like I definitely need to apologize to him more than he does to me”
“Instead of telling me that why don’t you just go”
“Heeehhh let me go hotbox the restroom and enjoy my first thennnn I’ll go talk to him later in the night”
“Might as well get another shot in while you’re at it”
“Ugh fineeee just because I know your gonna bother me about it anyways”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Its 10:35pm now your a bit more drunk then you would like and you where also a tad bit high as well.
You feel all sweaty and crammed now kinda wanting to go home now but you still wanna talk to Matt so you go to find him. you stumble apon chris first though he was sitting and talking to colby and his girlfriend Malia
“Hmm chris have you seen matt?”
“I havent actually why”
“I wanna talk to him”
“y/n youre drunk”
“Yes i know chris im not gonna do anything stupid trust”
“Hmm dont know if i should”
“He going into the bathroom right now” colby spoke up
“Hehe thank you colby also Malia you look absolutely gorgeous”
“Thank you y/n” she giggles
“Hmm of course”
You very joyfully head to where that bathrooms are and stand there and wait for matt to come out, getting more nervous you hit your pen
“You waiting for someone beautiful”
You look up and meet eyes with a guy youve never meet before, you look at him confused
“Random flattery wont work on me”“Awe come on you wouldnt dress that way for no reason”
“What are you implying exactly huh”
“You know what i mean look at you” he goes to grab your waist and you back up
“Hm okay well imma give you two options now. 1. Leave and dont bother me again, or 2. Continue to harass me and i make a scene”
“Awe come on a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be threatening no one” he went to brush your hair behind your ear but you slap his hand away
“Try some stupid shit again dawg”
“Awe what you think you all tuff i bet i could bend you over right here and fuck that attude out of you”
You spit in his face “lmao the fuck you think you are”
“YOU BITCH” he pushes you hard against the wall winding you
Just in the blink on an eye you see matt grab the dude by his collar his slam him against the wall “watch your fucking mouth and if see you put your hands on any women again ill wont just slam you against a wall next time, patchetic excuse of a man” matt lets go of the guy looking over at you worried then comes over too you
“Are you okay ?”
“Yeah i didnt feel it tbh im a little to drunk”
“Um can i jus-”
“Wait no dont say anything can we talk outside i really need to talk to you”
“Um yeah lets go to the van”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
You both head outside and get in the van at first it’s just silence between yall until Matt clears his throat so you speak up
“it’s been a while since I’ve sat up here”
“Yeah it’s one think Chris doesn’t have to worry about anymore”
“He must of loved when I stopped coming around huh”
“Only for the part he didn’t have to fight anyone for front seat, he misses messing with you he really sees you as a older sister y/n”
You didn’t even hear him you were too much in your head which lead to word vomit
“I’m sorry for everything, I was a pretty shitty girlfriend I never had trust for you even though you gave me no reason to feel like that I had a lot of mental health issues going on and I pushed everything onto you and it just became more and more toxic cause my jealously and insecurity’s only grew… I truly am sorry for everything”
There was a moment of pure silence which scared you a bit until Matt let out a light chuckle
“I see that you’ve gotten way better at talking about your feelings”
“Yeah it’s called get on anti depressants and getting help”
“Oh shit sorry..”
“Nono oh my god I was joking about the anti depressants, I am on ADHD medications now though” you laugh and how easily he believed you
“You’re an idiot”
“Youre a bigger one”
“Shut up”
“Hey, don’t catch an attitude with me Mister” you grab him by the chin making him look at you then let go
“Okay I’m sorry I take it back, but I do wanna say I still can’t apologize to you about how possessive I was cause well it hasn’t changed, I thought it was cause well I haven’t had any interest in anybody but no… seeing you again especially with other guys it gave the same feeling in the stomach that it did back then as well”
“Matt can I ask you something”
“Yeah of course ?”
“When we were together what was i for you”
He looks at you confused but then just sighs
“Everything. You made everything just feel so perfect nothing was bothersome anymore all my thoughts would leave my head I was just happy… anytime I was away from you all I was waiting for was you to text or call me once you weren’t busy anymore or asleep, everything revolved around you because I wanted it too, you felt like my true safe place… and when you ghosted me it honestly ruined me.
“Matt…”
“I thought it was some kinda sick joke at first but even Nick and Chris couldn’t get through to you.. it felt like my whole world crumbled down. After the first week I got a little better since Nick forced you not to break contact with him and Chris just because of me, I’m pretty sure neither of them told you this but sometime when you would call them they would have the phone on speaker just so I could hear your voice…it was the least they could do they said cause they felt bad”
“I’m sorry Matt I didn’t know it affected you so much…but I do remember on the 4th month of having no contact with you Nick called me at like 3am asking me if I could just get back with you could shut up but I didn’t know what he ment at the time”
He looked confused for a second but then it clicked
“I woke him up one night cause I couldn’t sleep and just complained about how much I missed you”
“You know I unblocked your number on the 4th month right?”
“Huh no what ?!?”
“Yeah I unblocked your number a while ago totally not to see if you would call me or something…but since you didn’t I just assumed you were over it at that point, it lifted a weight off my shoulders but now knowing that wasn’t the case, I’m sorry”
“Hm don’t apologize you didn’t know”
“I still feel bad” you pout
“Wipe that pout off your face you look ridiculous”
“Ugh you’re still so mean when I pout”
“Uh yeah your not a kid don’t baby yourself”
“I don’t even mean too you know that”
He laughs resulting in you taking a hit of your cart and exhale in his face, he waves the smoke out of his face
“Rude”
“YA MOTHER, actually I take that back I love your mom so much”
“She actually asked about you last week well she asked Nick not me”
“Awe did she really?”
“Yeah she asked when you would come to visit her in Boston”
“What yall tell her?”
“Nick told her that he would ask you”
“He never did ask”
“Oh well um when would you wanna go see her and dad?”
“Next time yall take the trip out there I’ll go with yall”
A huge smile plasters across Matts face, he uses his hand to cover his face trying not to seem more happy then he needed to be
“Yeah okay, I’ll let Chris and Nick know and we’ll figure out a week to go”
“Okay perfect, I’m actually kinda excited I haven’t been in forever”
“Does this mean we’re back to being friends?”
“Absolutely” you give him a bright smiles “just make sure to not go back into bad habits, I’ll make Nick go off on you”
“Yeah yeah whatever”
“I’m serious Matthew”
“I promise I won’t go back to my old bad habits”
“Pinky promise”
I hold my pinky out so Matt can interlock his but got distracted by the feeling of the car door opening behind me, it was Chris
“UGHHHAHHHHHH MOVE”
“Chris back now don’t even start”
“She just came back and I already have to sit in the back”
“She’s a women she gets front, go”
“Ughhh”
Chris dramatically closes the door with a big huff then gets in the back with Nick
“Sorryyyyy”
“You’re not sorry you have a full smile on your face”
I couldn’t help but giggle, I missed this to be honest.
“Okay let’s get y/n home and then call it a night huh”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Almost 4 months have passed since the party, you started hanging out with the triples more often even if it was just to sit in there house and do work, Nick wanted you up and out of your house even making you run errands with him and Matt just like yall use to. You were mostly with Nick and sometimes Chris for the first 2 weeks but gradually starting hanging with Matt more often weither it be watching a movie together or just talking about a topic over a meal.
After a month has passed yall started going on night drives together sometimes it wouldnt even be days you were at the house he would just randomly come by your place and tell you to come downstairs. Matt always knew you enjoyed listening to music and driving around at night and it was a nice way to catch up more, matt even opened up a bit more about his insecurities and internal struggles
Now going into a new month the boys planned a trip to Boston to visit their parents and of course you’re going along, you’re currently all packed and waiting for Matt to get to your place your legs bounce with anxiety but also excitement, you haven’t seen there parents in a while
Soon enough Matt texted you that they were here, you quickly headed downstairs seeing the van putting your luggage in the back you could hear Matt screaming at Chris to get in the back, Chris gets out of the front with a huff and gestures at you the get in
“Let’s go passenger princess we don’t have all day we have a flight to catch”
“Chris just shush”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
It’s now 6pm, trip there was nice no difficulties or anything except for Chris trying to scare you while on the plane resulting in Nick and Matt silently yelling at him cause he made you scream super loud by accident. once getting through all the airport security and whatnot yall where finally able to get outside, Nick ordered a Uber for yall while yall waited. You’re still a little tried leaning your head on Matt’s shoulder
“Y/n?”
“Hmm?”
“You okay?”
“Mhm just still tired, sorry”
“It’s okay, you can take a nap in my room when we get to the house yeah?”
“Can we eat first?”
“Mom knows we’re coming she said she’s making us dinner so you’ll eat don’t worry”
He tucks your hair behind your hair and kisses the top of your head, only recently he started being physically affectionate with you again and your fine with it he knows your boundaries
Soon enough the Uber gets there and yall head to the sturniolo household
Once there the boys head in first and you follow behind them, Mary Lou ignored the boys and engulfed you into a big hug
“Ohh honey how have you been”
“I’ve been good, how have you been?”
“Oh honey you know the same old same old nothing new around here, I’m glad to see you again I thought I wouldn’t see you again after Matt told me yall broke up”
“I thought the same thing to be honest but everything is worked out now, I’m glad to see you again and doing well”
“Same to you”
“Ayeeee look who it is, my daughter in law that’s technically not my daughter in law anymore but still definitely is to me”
You laugh at jimmys comment before he gives you a small squeeze
“It’s nice to see you again sweetheart”
“Same to you”
“Okok whatever y/n isn’t important what about your sons?”
Of course Chris had to speak up, you see Matt rushing back downstairs you didn’t even see him go upstairs
“Your stuff is in my room if you need anything”
“Thank you Matt”
“Mhm of course”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
It’s been 3 days since yall have been in Boston it’s been a lot of family time and catching up, you’ve been sleeping in Matt’s room on his bed while he continues to protest to sleep on the couch in the living room even though youve told him multiple times that its okay for him to sleep with you.
Its currently 8pm on a wednesday evening its just you and matt in the house chilling in the living room. mary lou, jimmy, chris, and nick went out to a small get together with friends. Matt didnt wanna go out which is common, you stayed because well your not from boston and dont know anybody theyre going out with plus you really wanted to catch up on your reading since your behind.
You get up from the couch to stretch
“Imma go take a quick shower”
“You showered yesterday though?’
“Imma just wash my body off not like im washing my hair”
“Hm okay have fun”
“I guess??”
You giggle as you walk away genuinely wondering why he seemed annoyed by you going to take a shower. You clip your hair back then grab some jammies and your hygiene stuff then go to the restroom to take your quick shower. You lied about the the quick shower you actually ended up doing an everything shower minus your hair cause you felt like it, it still wasnt super long only 20 minutes. After drying off you slip on your black lace panties and your junji ito PJ pants over them, tossing on a black spagettii strap not bothering to put a bra on, You also do your skin care then clean up and head back to matts room putting your dirty clothes in the basket you and matt are sharing for the time being.
You grab your headphones, penjamin, reading glasses, and book from your bag then get comfortable on matts bed putting in your headphone and connecting them to your phone choosing your reading playlist, opening your book placing the book mark next to you and put your glasses on, finally taking a blinker cough your lungs out a bit and now ready to get completely immersed in the book.
Its been 20 minutes since you finished showering matt figured you would comeback downstairs once your done but youve been gone for 40 minutes now and it was bothering him so he went upstairs to his room to see you peacefully reading on his bed not even noticing that he walked in, he decided not to bother you and just grabbed clothes so he could go shower as well leaving you be for now until he was done.
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
I picked up my phone to check the time its 7:27pm youve been reading for a little over an hour now, you take a quick stretch then sit back down to continue reading
“Damn you still reading?”
“Oh hm?”
I look up from my book and see Matt shirtless with grey sweatpants on and damp hair. I could feel my face heating up
“I came In here earlier and you were reading I figured by the time I finished my shower you would be done, didn’t know you wear glasses though when did that start”
“Oh. Um they’re just reading glasses I’ve had them for a while now but I never really read but now I use them all the time”
“Can you look at me and point your finger up”
Confused but curious I do as he says, he takes a picture and starts laughing
“You’re so cute”
“Oh shut up, let me see”
“I’m being serious”
He walks over to me showing me his phone with a stupid smile on his face
“I look so stupid”
“Erm actually looking ahh”
“SHUT UP”
“I’m kidding I’m kidding, I think you look very beautiful with your glasses”
He places his hand under my chin making me look up at him threw my glasses
“Don’t look at me with those eyes sweetheart”
“Maybe keep your mind out of the gutter, I’m just looking at you Matt”
He chuckles and lets go of my chin
“Well I’m headed back downstairs enjoy the rest of your night”
“Matt for the love of god can you just stay up here with me”
“Naw naw I don’t wanna bother you”
“Matthew Bernard sturniolo please stay with me”
I don’t know why I’m begging, but I just wanted to be with him I wanted it to feel like old times I don’t want him to put that space between us anymore, I just want him again.
“Are you sure?”
“Matt I swear to god-“
“Okok I get it I’ll stay”
“Okay, I’m almost done with with book though so give me like 5 minutes”
The moment I pick up my book he takes it from my hand and places it in a higher spot where I can’t reach
“You’re done reading cause I’m bored and cause I said so”
“Fine”
I take off my glasses as Matt crawled into bed with me, cuddling closer to him he wraps his arm around me and plays with my hair
“What’s going on sweetheart, what’s going through your head”
“Nothing why do you think that ?”
“Well it’s just that this is the first time we’ve done this In a long time so you know”
“I just wanna be close to you I don’t know, I’m comfortable around you”
“Glad I make you feel comfortable”
He kisses my forehead continuing to run his fingers through my hair, I drape my arm over his chest scooting myself closer to him
“Matt.”
“Yes?”
“Is it bad that I don’t wanna let you go ever again”
“No, cause neither do I. You’re so important to me on so many levels just those 8 months alone went to show me that I was miserable without you”
“I’m sorry”
“Don’t apologize, you did what you had to do and guess what you learning and progressing also helped me out you know”
Just watching him talk made you smile, Matt in general makes your heart feel warm
“Matt can you kiss me?…”
“Woah..y/n I-“
“Nevermind sorry that was to mu-“
Matt cups my cheeks and places a small peck on my lips then looks at me for reassurance, I nod my head. He pulls me into another kiss it’s slow but passionate just like it’s always been, I began to move myself from my side to the middle to straddle him, my thighs on either side of his body directly placed above his slowly but surely growing erection. I break the kiss, Matt places his hands on my thighs looking up at me
“Are you sure about this”
“If I wasn’t I would tell you”
“Hmkay just making sure baby, is it okay if I mark you”
“Only if they’re hidden”
“Can I make just one of them noticeable?”
“If you buy me the pair of shoes I’ve been wanting”
I said it as a joke cause Osiris NYC 83 skate shoes are 1. Expensive and 2. Lowkey hard to find especially the color ways I want. Seeing a smile spread across Matt’s face told me that he already bought me the shoes and I should have come up with a better deal.
“Whatever your thinking in your pretty little head in correct”
He flipped us over him now being on top of me
“Safe word is meatball”
“Matthew you’ve gotta be kidding me”
He chuckles and kisses my neck
“I’m joking sweetheart gosh, you know it’s always been strawberry nothing has changed”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
He carefully takes the clip out of your hair throwing it across the room, he kisses the side of your lip slowly going down peppering kisses over your neck he lightly bites down on your collarbone earning a whimper out of you
“Ow Matt”
“Sorry baby”
He kisses where he bit soothing his hand over it with his other hand slipping it under your shirt
“Can I take this off?”
You nod your head
“Words sweetheart”
“Yes”
“Arms up”
He easily slips your shirt off again tossing it across the room
“No bra?”
“Shut up”
“Yes ma’am”
He kisses down your chest to stomach leaving marks every once in a while, coming back to your lips giving you a small peck
“My pretty girl”
Your face heats up in embarrassment making you cover your face with your arms
“Awe come on don’t do that baby, let me see your pretty face”
You put your arms down
“There’s my beautiful girl”
“Matt just fuck me”
He chuckles “your so impatient I’m just admiring you honey, it’s been too long also just look at these beautiful tattoos on you”
He traces the stars that go down your left ribs, you squeeze you thighs together at this point everything Matt is doing just feels like teasing
“Do you really need me that bad”
“Oh shut the fuck up”
Matt slides his finger under your waist band
“When is the last time you’ve came y/n”
“Matt don’t make me answer that”
“No I wanna hear the answer”
“Matthew”
“Yes sweetheart”
You sighed knowing damn well he wasn’t gonna let it go
“The week before I ghosted you”
“Hm that was also the last time we had sex isn’t it?”
“Yes now shut up and just fuck me Matt please”
“At least you said please”
He quickly pulls down your bottoms panties included, Kissing down your stomach once again until reaching your pussy giving it a light peck
“Already wet huh?”
You close your legs around his head, you notice his eyes scanning over the tattoo on your under right thigh
“Yeah and what your gonna do about it ??”
“Eat you the fuck out”
(I would write full smut for yall but I’m genuinely so bad at it..)
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Now naked cuddling in bed together watching SpongeBob while Matt plays with your hair making you doze off a little
“You tried sweetheart?”
“Kinda”
“Let me get some clothes on you then we can sleep yeah?”
“Yeah”
Matt grabs you a pair of his boxers and a shirt of his
“You got it or want me to do it”
“I’ll do it just throw on some boxers please, I love you and your body and your dick very much but please cover it up”
“Repeat what you said”
“Throw on some boxers please”
“After that”
“I love you?”
“I love you too”
He puts on his boxers while you slip on your as well and put his shirt on, he lays back in bed tacking you in the process
“Does this mean we’re back together?”
“Don’t rush it pretty boy ask me again in the morning and I’ll say yes as of right now though let’s sleep”
“I love you so much”
“I love you too Matt, I won’t leave you again I promise”
“You better you know much I hate when you leave, just stay”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Ragghhh hihiiii um this is kinda an authors note i guesss sorry if this is kinda wack shit I had writters block for 8 months and this is my first writing coming out of it so be nice 3:
#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#sturniolo x reader#Spotify#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#chris sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo smut#nick sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo x you#smut
87 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hii! Hope you’re having a great day :D
I was thinking about Law with a tall male reader who looks very intimidating. everyone thinks that he is the top in the relationship but Law is the one who actually tops/? Like his s/o looks like a top but is actually a pillow princess. ;)
You can take this as a request or not if you want :3
Trafalgar D. Water Law x Tall male reader
Headcanons
Guten Abend everyone, still getting dragged over the studying coals, but fuck it we ball.
No outright smut in this one, mainly just focusing on their relationship since im exhausted, but I hope its still enjoyable.
In the One Piece universe, being tall can mean a lot of things. Being taller than Law just means you have to be somewhere over 6 ft 5, or taller, if that’s what you prefer. Being intimidating isn’t too hard either, especially if you are a fellow pirate.
Seeing you two together can be a little off-putting to the people around you, at least the ones that aren’t part of your crew, who know you two on a more personal level.
No one would dare to make assumptions in the beginning of a meeting, since Law already has quite the reputation, and either your scary aura or your own dangerous reputation makes people shut up. They might have ideas to themselves, but they wouldn’t verbalize it.
It probably comes up during an afterparty of some kind, after you guys have defeated the baddie of the week and you’re all kicking back. Since Law isn’t a big fan of drinking, you would end up being the one getting tipsy out of the two of you.
At some point during the night, Kidd or others who are more comfortable with you two, would start making jabs or ask questions, as one does when you get wasted. It becomes clear pretty damn quick though, that everyone thinks that Law is the one who bottoms.
Law isn’t the type to out your guy’s bedroom life, but I could still imagine him asking, in a bit of a tense tone, why they think that. That’s when you guys get the explanation from your allies and friends. But it all boils down to you being taller, bigger, scarier and with a stronger presence. So, it just made sense to them.
It gets a bit of a laugh from you, and you can tell from the tension in Laws jaw that it gets on his nerves, maybe even hurting his ego a little. But you also know your lover wouldn’t verbalize those thoughts, not wanting to admit something like an assumption of his bedroom role would hit him in any way.
When you guys get back to the polar tang, one would assume Law would drag you off to the bedroom to show you and him that your friends and allies’ assumptions were wrong. But Law is also a doctor, so he wouldn’t want to do such a thing when you’re drunk.
Instead, he gets some water in you, gets you something to eat, helps you get washed down if that’s what you need, and then the two of you conk out in bed, Law the big spoon even if you are taller. Hes like your tattooed backpack, if the height difference is big enough.
Law doesn’t end up making a move on you in the morning either if you suffer from hangovers, instead your lover would make sure you were alright, and get you something for the hangover if its bad enough. His ego may have been wounded a little, but he’s a respectful guy, especially to you as his lover.
That evening, or the day after though, you’re all his, not that you mind though. Seeing as all your crewmates are most likely still out partying or suffering from hangovers, you two have the polar tang all to yourself.
As you enjoy laying back and receiving pleasure without doing much in return, Law gets to do most of the work. He doesn’t need the same in return, as giving you pleasure is satisfying for him. Being in charge would feel quite nice for him, as it allows him to have an eye on the entire situation and what’s going on.
Law would definitely also use his devil fruit power when you guys are together, since it would make it easier for the both of you, and with his devil fruit he’s able to reach parts of you no one else can.
In the end, people you meet, and probably most of your friends and allies, think you are the top still, but Law wouldn’t mind too much after you show him that you don’t think lesser of him or let other people’s assumptions bother you or your relationship.
#male reader#trafalgar d water law#trafalgar law#one piece#trafalgar law imagine#trafalgar law headcanon#trafalgar law x male reader#trafalgar law x reader#one piece imagine#one piece headcanon#one piece x male reader#one piece x reader#trafalgar d water law imagine#trafalgar d water law headcanon#trafalgar d water law x male reader#trafalgar d water law x reader
92 notes
·
View notes
Note
What do you think Dom Channie's favorite things to do to you are (w a fem y/n) if he was given a choice to do whatever?
This is not an exhaustive list. The more I thought about it, the more ideas would come. I had to rein it in.
MDNI // SMUT
Video you masturbating in front of him. He’ll direct you to sit on his bed, leaning on his headboard. He keeps you dressed in your little black skirt and long socks. “That’s it babygirl. Open your legs for me.” He licks his lip as he hits record on his phone. He sits in his computer chair, pumping his cock with his free hand. “Now, pull your panties to the side. Show daddy your pretty little pussy… that’s it…just like that.” He’ll record you playing with yourself. Then he’ll do another of his favourite things…
Edge you. He stops you from playing with yourself once you’re close to climax, so he can climb on top of you, and push his fat cock into your tightness. He likes to squeeze inside you when you’re on the verge of coming because you’re so wet, swollen and engorged. You suck him in and grip him tight. He continues to video you, focusing now on your face now so he can capture your flushed cheeks and pornographic moans. “Such a good fucking girl. Who’s my pretty little personal porn star…hmm?”, “I should show this to the boys… they’ll probably fuck into their hands watching you.”
Finger fuck you in public. You’re only allowed to wear skirts and dresses so he has access to your pussy whenever he needs to feel you. He’s known to get you to spread your legs in the passenger seat of his car so he can slip his fingers into you while he drives. Too bad if you’re stopped next to a bus at traffic lights, because he’s not going to stop. He’ll wind the window down so if someone looks down from the window of the bus they’ll see it all. At the club he’ll get you to sit on his lap and finger fuck you the entire time. “You’re not going anywhere, babygirl. Not until you cream on my fingers”. Same at the movies. Your parents house at the dinner table. On a flight. On a train. Anywhere really.
Fuck you in department store changing rooms. He’s a sick fuck. He gets you to sample a perfume from the perfume section, then choose a pretty bra or skimpy outfit to try on… then he’ll slip into the change room and fuck you dumb against the mirror. “Listen to how wet you are…the people in the next cubicle know you’re being fucked like you’re a little cockslut.” If there’s a bench or seat in there he’ll get you to ride him. Of course the phone comes out to video you, propping it up in the corner and capturing you riding him. Then, when his done he gets you to return the clothes to the staff member manning the change rooms, knowing they heard the whole thing.
Adorns you with a ball gag and collar when he wants to fuck your ass. With your face pushed into the mattress, he takes his time to prep you properly. Then he fucks you from behind, spanking your ass hard with his hand as pounds into you. With your mouth gagged you can’t tell him to stop, and he won’t stop until he’s good and ready and you have tears streaming down your face.
Fuck your pussy no prep. As much as he loves to fuck you after he’s edged you, he also loves to bend you over the back of the couch, or table, or up against a wall, and push his cock into your cunt without much warning. He loves it because you love it. Your cunt feels so tight as your walls try to accommodate him. Turns out you love a bit of pain. And it turns him on hearing you struggle to take it. “Naww…It hurts doesn’t it, babygirl?” He’ll say as he continues to push further into you. You cry out of from the sting. You cry out because he pushes against your cervix. It’s like he’s not going to fit. But he makes it fit. All it takes is two thrusts and you’re soaking wet and then he can really fuck you hard. “Such a sick little girl, loves it when daddy hurts her.”
@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itshannjisung @chansbabyg @kangnina @weareapackofstrays @xxkissesforchanniexx @sunshinesquokka @enjaken @queenmea604 @lyramundana @queen-in-the-shadows @bethanysnow @newhope8 @chuuchuu1224 @vanillacupcakefrosting @3rachasdomesticbanana @fun-fanfics
#bangchan smut#bangchan hard thoughts#chan skz smut#chan smut#bang chan hard thoughts#Skz smut#Sorsha is asked
108 notes
·
View notes
Text
overwatch ratings based on how they would date
did this a while ago but spent too much time on it for it to not be posted. this is just a personal opinion and personal ratings based off lore and bias tbh. this will be updated with every hero (if I remember to lol)
Tanks:
D.VA: 6/10. Caring and loving, fun gaming dates, but gets recognized a lot, and if it came down to it she’d choose her job to protect south korea over her lover
Doomfist: 4/10. He’d be a gentleman but probably only in it for sex or to be a sugar daddy. He’d treat his “lover” with respect tho so not a total loss i guess.
Junker Queen: 7/10. After the shit she’s been thru i think she doesnt really want a partner cuz shes afraid they’re just using her to get to the throne or that she’ll lose them. She’s protective and caring but also a bit overprotective to the point where it’s like okay calm down. Also might get into a few fights but eh.
Orisa: 0/10. she thinks it would be cute to be in a relationship but knows she cant be in one due to being the “protector of numbani”. so no.
Ramattra: 8/10. Deadass depends if it’s an omnic or not. If his lover is an omnic he will cherish them and take care of them, knowing that they’re one of the few things he loves in this life. If it’s a human then theres some. Problems. He doesnt open up easily and while he’s still protective and caring he can sometimes get very distant towards them because he fears that they only got close to him to use him or kill him.
Reinhardt: 9/10: Perfect gentleman. Treats you with respect and love, and cherishes you no matter what. -1 is because he can be really loud sometimes even when he doesnt mean to be
Roadhog: 5/10. I think of him as aroace but he would try and give it a shot just to feel what it’s like. Hes very quiet but also very calm. He would listen to his lover and do his best to help them, but he moves around a lot thanks to junkrat now and might cut off communication with you just to keep you safe when he's on the run
Sigma: 5/10. A real gentleman, would treat his lover with respect and kindness and love. Only downside is when he has one of his mind breaks and breakdowns. He forgets who he is and just focuses on violence. Also his control of gravity in that state is very fucky so if he’s having a breakdown his lover might get throw to the ground. He feels like jackshit afterwards and probably realizes it’s best not to have someone he cares about so close to him
Wrecking Ball: 0/10 no. he would simply not even if he wanted to. Aroace hampter
Winston: maybe a 1/10. i feel like he doesnt want a romantic relationship with anybody and just wants friends (aroace monke)
Zarya: 6/10. Protective and caring but would focus too much on her job. would also pick her country over her lover if it did come down to it
Mauga: 8/10: Would treat his lover right and give them anything they asked for. Free beach house, gifts, and a loving, protective, obsessive bf. -2 because slight yandere vibes and can get too possesive-
Damage:
Ashe: 6/10. Partners in crime kinda thing but if you’re not really into that stuff she’s probably not that into you. She has BOB watching you when she cant during a fight but shes always next to you when she can be.
Bastion: 0/10. Dude just wants to live in the woods with his bird he doesnt want that stuff.
Cassidy: 8/10. Southern sweetheart. Treats his partner with love and respect. Only downside is that he’d be out a lot doing his job, but he would let somebody else do it to be with you if it’s a special occasion or if he really wants to stay with you.
Echo: 2/10. Not big on romance but would try it out for science. Sadly in the end it’s not real love so. Oof
Genji: 9/10. Probably doesn’t want a relationship at first because of his body but he gets used to it and opens up his heart. Honestly very good boyfriend would be there to listen and help you with stuff. -1 cuz he might be out doing overwatch stuff a lot and also might not be the most exciting person to be around if you're a hyper person.
Hanzo: 6/10. Can’t see him getting in a relationship after everything thats happened but if he did he’d be kinda bad at it but you could tell that he’s trying his best.
Junkrat: 5/10. I love him but i cant really see him *staying* in a relationship for long. He doesn’t know how to stop sometimes and can get really annoying really quick but he loves making things for his lover and would do his best to keep them away from the dangerous bombs. He loves them a lot but doesn’t know how to turn the love down. Really clingy so if youre into that cool.
Mei: 9/10. Absolute sweetheart. Loves you to bits and takes you out to her favorite restaurants and stuff. -1 cuz you had to have a long distance relationship due to her being in Antarctica and the fact she slept for years with no communication with her lover-
Phara: 4/10. Cares about her job more but would be an okay girlfriend, doing the basics.
Reaper: 1/10. He’s done with love and would probably just just be a sugar daddy or just be there for sex. Even if he did find himself feeling something he’d ignore it and move on
Sojourn:5/10. Not interested in dating or finding love but if it finds her she’ll go for it. Pretty nice girlfriend, makes sure to take care of her lover but does focus on her job a lot more sometimes.
Soldier:76: 0/10. Not interested and has made sure to break off any past relationships. Doesn’t want the people he cares about to get hurt. So he still cares but doesnt go see them.
Somba: 7/10. Would be a pretty good girlfriend if she wanted to have a relationship. She keeps all people she cares about far away and unaware of her deeds at Talon. So a long distance relationship until she can take some time off to go see her lover and vibe.
Symmetra: 3/10. Doesn’t know how to even start a relationship and doesn’t really want to. Her job is important to her so she wouldn’t want distractions from it.
Torbjorn: 6/10. His wife and him had a few children and have been married for a while so he’s probably got the whole love thing covered.
Tracer: 9/10. Probably one of the best on this list. She’s loving and caring and makes sure to spend a lot of time with her partner.
Widowmaker: 3/10. Last partner she had was um. killed by her so. +3 if you could break down her walls and see the real her but very low chance
Venture: 8.5/10: Would talk to you about rocks, fossils, and everything else they can think about. They’d even let you name rocks around the house. -2 cuz they’ll talk your ear off about rocks n stuff while also bouncing around everywhere. They can also be gone for long periods of time but always makes sure to call. If you can deal with the infodumping and adhd then 9.5/10 for you
Support:
Ana: 5/10. She doesn’t want a relationship but she’d be very loving and caring to her lover.
Baptiste: 8/10. Great boyfriend, lovers needs always come first and he’s very open and always has an ear out to listen. -2 because he’s constantly on the run and the relationship could get stressed.
Brigitte: 5/10. Mostly focused on her work but would make a pretty good girlfriend if she finds the right person. The relationship would mostly be a test one because she lowkey doesn’t understand it.
Kiriko: 4/10. Would love to be in a relationship but protecting her home is more important than finding love to her.
Lucio: 9/10. Actual sweetheart. Would make music for you and would cancel shows last second if something came up and you needed something. If you need anything he’ll be there to help.
Mercy: 8/10. She’s really focused on her work but no matter what would take time to come stay with you for a while. -2 because sometimes too focused on work and sometimes doesnt have time to see you for a long time.
Moira: 0/10. Not looking for a relationship and would probably lie just to get you strapped to a table and butchered.
Zenyatta: 7/10. Would make a decent boyfriend but he can’t have relationships due to being a monk. He’d be there to listen and to give advice when you needed it.
Liveweaver: 9/10. Perfect boyfriend in every way. Like no competition. -1 cuz he's on the run from multiple governments so he won't be able to talk all the time or be with you much to his dismay. multiple texts a day tho
Illari: 4/10. Tbh I can't see her getting into a relationship after everything. She's too scared that something will happen with her powers again and hurt her lover
#overwatch#overwatch 2#overwatch x reader#i dont wanna tag everyone im sobbing rn#dva x reader#doomfist x reader#junker queen x reader#ramattra x reader#reinhardt x reader#roadhog x reader#siebren de kuiper x reader#zarya x reader#mauga x reader#ashe x reader#cassidy x reader#genji x reader#hanzo x reader#junkrat x reader#mei x reader#baptiste x reader#mercy x reader#Lifeweaver x reader#devv's writings
56 notes
·
View notes
Text
Cold Hands, Warm Heart
Fluff
Rengoku Kyojuro x gn!reader
Reader has cold hands… do you think the Flame Hashira would stand for such an injustice?!
Warnings: none
You sighed for what felt like the millionth time that day, focusing your energy on hanging up the laundry in front of you. Your job as an assistant to Shinobu at the Butterfly Mansion was keeping you on your feet, busy as ever, but you still couldn't warm up. By all accounts, your hands shouldn't be as ice cold as they were since it was a mild spring day, but you had always had this problem so it just became a constant in your life. You tugged on your uniform sleeve in hopes of it reaching over your hands a bit more, but you found no relief in the thin fabric. Irritated, you finished your work and decided to stay outside for a short break, hoping that basking in the sun would help thaw your freezing phalanges. Looking around to see you were completely alone, you raised your palms toward the sky in an attempt to speed up the warming process. If anyone were to see you right now, they would most certainly brand you a fool. You relished the tepid air flowing around you, closing your eyes to allow for maximum relaxation-
"Y/N! HOW ARE YOU TODAY?"
Your eyes shot open as you yelped in surprise. The Flame Hashira had snuck up on you and practically given you a heart attack. If he took notice of your flustered state, he was too kind to mention it, instead beaming at you with a kind smile.
"Rengoku! You took me by surprise, I didn't hear you behind me. I'm doing alright, thank you. How about yourself?" You wanted him to take over the conversation for a moment so you could calm your breathing, your heart still racing from his unexpected arrival.
"I am doing well! I just came back from a mission and came here in search of something to ease my sore muscles." His usually unwavering gaze faltered a bit, looking to the grass you stood on for the shortest moment before landing on you once more. "I also wanted to see you."
It was a shock that you were cold before because now it felt like your whole body was on fire after hearing Rengoku's words. Was he just being friendly? Or did he hold some sort of romantic feelings toward you? You would be content either way but truly wished it was the latter. You had a crush on the man for many months now but were too shy to make your affections known, too afraid of losing your close bond of friendship.
"That's very kind of you. Is there something in particular you wanted to see me for?"
Rengoku took a step toward you, shortening the gap between you but not enough to invade your personal space. "No. I just enjoy your company very much. I would like to spend some time with you before I have to leave for another mission. That is, if you'll allow me to take up your time, of course."
You couldn't believe your ears. This handsome man desired to get to know you better? You were beyond flattered and definitely weren't going to turn him down.
"You are the most pleasant company I could ask for, Rengoku. Please, take a seat on this bench with me and rest for a bit." He followed your lead and sat next to you, your legs touching ever so slightly.
He was the first to break the comfortable silence that had fallen between you. "May I ask what you were doing when I first joined you? It looked like you were worshipping the sun. If so, I would like to learn about this custom and partake in it myself!"
You couldn't hold in the laugh that escaped your lips. "Oh, no, no. It wasn't anything like that. My hands were extremely cold so I thought that the closer to the sun they were, the warmer they would get."
He nodded in understanding like it was the most normal thing on earth for a person to reach for the sky like a desperate flower. You were glad Rengoku was the one to find you in such a silly position because he was never one to judge people for things like that. He approached most situations with an open mind and willingness to learn, traits which you found admirable.
"Have they found their warmth?"
You shook your head and he gestured his own hands toward yours. "May I?"
You tentatively brought your hands in front of you and Rengoku, with the lightest amount of force possible, scooped them into his grip. You were immediately met with a cozy feeling emanating from his skin, heat finally entering your body. Rengoku's touch was astonishingly gentle for a man of his stature and status as one of the best demon slayers. Though you knew of his benevolent disposition, it wasn't your first thought that the hands of someone who's seen such horrendous things and taken so many lives (all justified, of course) could be this soothing, or... loving, almost. As he held your hands, the look on his face could be described as nothing less than full of serenity, like you two were lovers reuniting and expressing your fondness for each other. Slowly but surely the icy chill dissipated from your fingers but the feelings that were left behind in its wake were harder to figure out. Actually, maybe it wasn't so difficult after all. You had never seen Rengoku treat anyone like this before. Sure, he was overly friendly to his allies, but he never initiated physical touch like this. Beside the fact, he could clearly tell your hands had warmed up and yet was still holding on like you were a floating piece of driftwood and he was drowning in a stormy sea. You were reluctant to let go, too. You had never felt so safe, so protected, in your entire life and it didn't have to do with the fact that he was a Hashira.
"Y/N, would it be alright if I confess something to you?" Rengoku asked, his red and yellow eyes glinting in the sunlight and making your heart skip a beat.
"You can tell me anything," you replied earnestly.
He took in a steadying breath before starting. "Over the years we have known each other, you have been a wonderful friend. You're reliable, smart, and kind hearted. However, lately I find myself thinking of you in different terms. I take notice of how your eyes sparkle like stars when any source of light touches them. I envy the rain as it falls upon your soft skin. Even now, as we are surrounded by nature's most beautiful work, this scene pales in comparison to you. You have bewitched me, ensnared my soul. Would you grant me the great honor of being your partner?"
"Oh Kyojuro," you said, softly smiling, "How I've waited for the day to hear those words come tumbling from your lips. You are the sun to my moon and the only man to have ever captured my heart. It will be a privilege to be loved by you."
You felt his hands squeeze around yours a little tighter in reassurance as you exchanged lovesick grins. You hated your cold hands for many years but now, with the Flame Hashira by your side as a personal heater, you would never have to worry about it again.
#rengoku x reader#demon slayer x reader#kyojuro x reader#rengoku x reader fluff#kyojuro rengoku#kyojuro rengoku x reader
31 notes
·
View notes
Note
this is probably because im hungry rn but i cannot stop thinking about how well fed suguru would keep you :((
that man is a DAMN good cook he can fuck it up in the kitchen so of courseee hed whip up whatever you want when your pudgy tummy starts growling and you whine for something from your boyfriend
if youre tired after work/uni/whatever, hed handfeed food to you because he just feels so bad that his baby had to deal with an empty stomach!!! suguru just loves you so much!!!!!!!
going off of that tummy grabber post you made, if youve eaten too much hed lay you between his legs on the couch, put a nice show on, and then rub your midsection (more like gently grope) until it all goes away. then hed probably squeeze and massage you a little more, just in case :)
if you ever get a sudden craving, no matter where the two of you are or what time it is, he WILL go out and buy you whatever you want. 10pm and you want a whole gallon of extra sugary ice cream? hes giving you a kiss and embarking on his journey. 7am and you want a big pasta dish? the search bar is already open and hes looking for nearby italian restaurants. 2pm and your just had lunch but youre still hungry for breakfast? the waffle iron is heating up and hes making the batter from scratch.
theres also leftovers. always. not because neither of you could finish it (sugurus cooking is just so good you think youd be seated at the dining table and be filling yourself up for hours) its so you can always have something to heat up whenever you get hungry and never have to worry about tiring yourself out with a complex meal.
all of this pampering shows on you, of course, but you dont mind. suguru is very appreciative of the extra layers of fat and shows it almost everyday. whether it be through coming up behind you and grabbing wherever the most weight is and jiggling it a bit as a greeting, giving you a kiss on the fullest part of your cheek, buying you tight clothes that show everything off, or having you ride his face (that ones his favorite, he asks for that almost everyday. the other days are booked up by him taking you missionary to watch all the fat in your body ripple everytime he pounds into you)
hes such a gentleman. everytime you feel like doing a food crawl through the various restaurants in tokyo, hell pay for all of it. even if you get all the extra sides and fillings, two sugary drinks, and the biggest and most expensive serving, hell look at you with heart eyes and swipe his card.
obviously, with all the food being put into your belly, youd want him to have some too!!! an effort is made to share with suguru, and he accepts. before, he had an average amount of fat to muscle ratio, but with a combination of your love for food and some tweaks to his workout routine, he ends up with chub lining his thighs, tummy, chest, and arms. of course he adores it, its a physical reminder of how much the two of you love each other :)))
when both of you are sleepy, hungry, and horny at the same time, suguru will have you gently ride him on the couch (hes helping you go up and down carefully) as he feeds you a variety of your favorite snacks and an uncomplicated dinner that he can easily bring to your mouth and his. maybe theres a movie on in the background, maybe hes murmuring words dripped in honey into your ear as you both fatten yourselves while in the throes of pleasure.
suguru just likes when he and his partner are plump, full, and happy. what can he say?
AUGHHHH OP I ALMOST CAME UNTOUCHEDDDD everything is so true.
Not only that real and true info, his way of comforting would be so endearing, albeit a bit unhealthy. He’s talking you through all of your stressors and then providing you with all of the sweetest treats that make you smile. His big hands smooth your hair as you eat so you can simply focus on the taste and nothing more. But sometimes it gets him going!!! Seeing you so focused and content, so pleased with just stuffing your face makes him wanna stuff you with something else. He can’t help the way he feels warm when you look at him after finishing the plate. His dick is jumping leaps and bounds at the white icing that has stickied your lips. Lord help him!!! He might buss if you kiss him with your sugar lips
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
You guys, I feel like I’m drowning. These past three weeks have felt unmanageable to me. Like, I don’t know how to keep going.
I’m walking alongside (trying the best I know how) the older girls as one navigates this break up and the other tries to transition to college. We got DD a car, but it still needs a few repairs. She was here all afternoon today working on it with DH.
I am waiting for the updated version of Ms. 6’s IEP to hit my inbox to send it off to the school. I am also working on her housing contract. Then I think I can step back for a few weeks. Still trying to figure out what’s going on with graduation. Her mom is back to letting her go to it and maybe allow her to stay for dinner, but it’s Memorial Day weekend and I don’t want to put a deposit down for a dinner somewhere only to have her not be allowed to attend at the last minute. I also don’t want to disappoint her. I’m unsure of how to proceed, so I’m just sort of frozen.
DS takes his civics test next week. You have to pass in order to graduate high school. He has prepared and seems like he will do well. He’s also pole vaulting and doing well at that for being a novice and having very little practice time due to the crummy weather we’ve been having.
Work is a lot right now. It’s to be expected due to the time of year. I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it’s a lot to slog through.
DH was verbally offered a job this week as a special education teacher. He is supposed to return to school to get his teaching certification in about a week, and is waiting for a letter of intent via email from the potential employer. It’s a lot. We are trying to manage the financial aid piece and we are up against a super tight deadline right now. His interview for the job was virtual, so he’s heading to the school next week to actually tour it and meet his potential coworkers. In the spirit of living in a small town, one of the women he used to live who was in live with him (for real)—the housing situation was work related—works at the school. She has legit not spoken to myself or DH since he and I got engaged so that seems like it will be super awkward (although she is also married now and has kids).
DH is finally seeing a decent therapist and between the therapist and neuropsych eval he had done during fall, it is apparent he is super depressed. Depressed is apparently his baseline and super depressed happens quite a bit. It is helpful to have it identified, but wow, it is a lot to live with. I am really struggling as his wife because he cannot do much and is not really emotionally available 90% of the time. He’s so inwardly focused, that he cannot focus on me, the kids, relationships, stuff that needs to be done, etc. I’m drowning and he cannot take on any of the workload. It sucks.
My endocrin had me take b12 supplements the last three months and my level actually decreased. I’m starting up with b12 injections next week. My TSH is also super, super low which means I’m hyperhyroid and should be losing weight, but I’m gaining which also sucks.
My endocrin is out of network for me which means my injections will be out of network. I have ZERO out of network benefits. The whole healthcare system is atrocious. I refuse to go back to the three endocrins I saw before I connected with my current one. They were all terrible, but in network. I need a super expensive full body scan but I for sure cannot pay for that out of pocket, so I’m waiting to see if my GP will prescribe it when I see him in June.
My crown also broke this week and when the dentist looked at it, I had worn a hole clear through the middle. He said it was due to grinding/stress. I wear a mouth guard religiously at night, so it’s happening during the day. :-/ Cue more medical bills. They glued my current one back on and can’t get me in to work on repair until June. I almost cried when trying to schedule with them because I just cannot even do all of this any more. (It also hurt wicked bad last time they fixed it so I’m somewhat terrified to return.)
That’s my list of complaints/brain dump. There’s more, but I need to wrap up some grading and get dinner going. I miss a life that was easier and less complicated.
30 notes
·
View notes
Note
Heading to bed, but yeah just to clarify I view the André, Chloe, Audrey thing as a lot like Chloe's suite thing.
André didn't put Chloe in an over exposed, barely private suite she can't impart any personality on to be cruel. He didn't put her in a suite bereft of any of the material tools or means to develop self sufficiency and life skills because he was aiming to keep her dependent on him.
But it sure as fuck worked out that way!
It also fed into what he wanted from the relationship, to feel needed and important and a provider, so he never had reason to correct it.
Similarly, he didn't look at Chloe & think "You will be my replacement Audrey". So much as view her as a sort of symbolic, "Proof Audrey loves me" which only got inflamed when she began mimicking Audrey in manner and behavior.
Which left the sense Chloe's approval was Audrey's approval, but also cos she wasn't actually Audrey always meant she was a silver medal. Hence him shrugging off how Audrey treats her and focusing on Audrey when she's around, at first.
Thus it becomes recreating his dynamic with Audrey, but with someone who relies on him and needs him. So he gets the familiarity of the relationship with Audrey to fill her absence but also praise and fawning which gave his ego & identity affirmation and soothing.
I didn't intend to convey actual physical actions had strictly occurred.
The term I used, emotional incest, is:
Described as occurring when a parent is unable or unwilling to maintain a relationship with another adult and forces the emotional role of a spouse onto their child instead.
The child's needs are ignored and instead the relationship exists solely to meet the needs of the parent and the adult may not be aware of the problems created by their actions.
It has been described as "unboundaried bonding" in which the parent or parents use the child as a mirror to support their needs, rather than mirroring the child in support of the child's emotional development
So less something planned and plotted and more a deeply unhealthy evolution born of an already messed up relationship and person.
I imagine in universe it'd be one of those things that some people might notice but also not notice, in a sort of "Am I just imagining that this feels a bit... Off? Am I reading too much into how she's talking & behaving?" But if they stuck around and watched long enough would be like, "OK, no I wasn't imagining it, this dynamic is all twisted up and terrible."
Like it might not be physical, but its still really unhealthy, like parentification or enforced dependency and like the above it just feels like it can fit a little too neatly in as a read on the relationship.
Either way it's fucked!
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Like a Doll? (doll!reader x Vox)
CW: Rape/Non-con, abuse, SA, mind control, manipulation, nsfw, smut, Vox being an asshole (he’s in hell for a reason), AU typical events
Note: Vox is manipulative, possessive, jealous, impulsive, controlling, and harsh in this AU. He can be extremely violent towards reader, and is consistently abusing them either way. He is not a good person! If anyone is sensitive to or may have a negative reaction from these topics, I recommend clicking away now.
Tell me if you all want more stuff like this, or just some smut in general! Also, good luck. This is… uh, quite the read. Also let me know if I need to add any other warnings!
"Hello there, darling," Vox said, walking up to me. I was sitting at his desk, mainly focused on my work. He noted how I sat across from him, in his office, writing on my clipboard. He felt irritated, since he wasn't receiving as much attention as he'd like. He pushed the feeling aside for now. "Busy day?"
"Yeah, something like that," I said, with a small yawn. I didn't really look up at him, I was trying to finish my work. It was clear I was bored, and a bit tired. "Just the usual. How have you been, my dear?"
Vox watched me work without taking his eyes off of me. He was feeling frustrated by my lack of attention and my indifference to him. Apparently. He decided to change his approach, just this once, and try a new tactic.
I didn't really notice how long it was asking him to respond, nor his frustration with me. I was his personal assistant, and as such, I was trying to do my work and make his job easier for him.
"I've been doing quite well, actually," Vox responded, his tone suddenly shifting from irritated to soft and almost cooing. He walked over to me, kneeling down in front of my chair. "How about you, though? Are you feeling a bit..."
"A bit...?" I asked, waiting for him to finish. He'd caught some of my attention now. probably not as much as he'd like, though.
"Like a doll?" Vox asked smugly. That was the first indicator as to where this would be going. The first hint as to what he'd do if he didn't get what he wanted. The word 'doll' had an impact on every one of his assistants, but even more so on me, since I was his personal assistant and significant other. The power that word held alone wasn't much, but if it were a apart of a specific phrase...
"Like a doll?" I asked, with a small smile. My first reaction was a twinge of panic, but that quickly faded. He hadn't used the trigger phrase yet, so I was still okay, still in control.
"A bit neglected?" Vox purred, leaning in close to nuzzle against my leg. His hand slid up my thigh, fingers trailing along the inside of my exposed stocking. "Perhaps I could be more... attentive?"
I laughed softly at his playful attitude. "I'm fine, that's not a big deal," I said, nonchalant.
"Oh, but it is a big deal," Vox purred, leaning in closer still. His hand slid up my thigh more insistently now, fingers tracing along the bare skin beneath my skirt. He was setting this up slowly, preparing to use the trigger phrase at the right moment. "You know how much I love you, right?"
"Y-yeah," I said with a nod. I blushed a bit and smiled. I gave him a quick, small kiss. It wouldn't be enough. He always wanted more. The action was a sign of how easily I gave into his moods, of how easily I gave into him. "I love you too, darling."
"Darling," he repeated, his tone dripping with affection. He leaned in even closer now, his lips brushing against my neck as he spoke. "Do you think you could be a doll for me tonight?"
"Yeah," I said, softer. I relaxed, almost immediately. He'd used the phrase, now I had to oblige. I didn't have a choice. I probably would've gone along with it either way, but now I had to. Now I wouldn't be able to resist doing as he said. "Of course," I said, my eyes glazing over slightly. I was always still aware whenever he used that trigger phrase on me, even if I wasn't in control.
"That's my girl," Vox purred, his lips brushing against my ear. "Now, why don't you be a doll and undress for me? Slowly." He nuzzled against my neck, his hands sliding down to rest on my hips.
I did as I was told, despite the fact we were still in his office, still at work. Usually, I would protest, or insist on doing this somewhere else. Right now? I didn't have that luxury. I was his doll, doing whatever he asked. I unbuttoned my shirt slowly, undressed slowly, for him.
His hands were gentle as he undid the buttons of his slacks, but there was a sense of urgency in his movements that belied the innocence of his touch. "I want you to do something for me, my little doll.
"V-Vox..." I said hesitantly. He had ordered me to undress, he hadn't ordered me not to speak. I could still talk to him, I just couldn't object to anything directly unless he let me. Saying his name like that, combined with the blush on my face, signaling embarrassment, indicated that it was a plea. The closest thing to one I could manage right now, at least. I was asking him to stop, the best I could.
He finally got his pants off, and looked at me with a wide predatory smile, "I want you to be a doll and please me." He said, letting his words sink in for a moment before continuing. "Use your mouth."
“Okay,” I said with a nod. I repositioned myself slightly, to make it easier. Like a compliant a little toy. I was a tad worried about how it’d turn out. We’d never done it before, mostly due to how uncomfortable the thought of it made me. Right now, I was literally incapable of going against my orders, or even thinking about going against them. I had to do it, whether I wanted to or not. I really didn’t want to.
He moved closer, his eyes locked with mine as he gently slipped his throbbing erection past my lips, taking careful not to force it too far at once, mindful of my gag reflex and the situation. "That's it, my little doll.”
I played around the head, getting a taste of him. Getting used to it, for a moment. If I’d been in my right mind, I’d have resisted, or bitten him. If I’d been in control, I’d be openly displaying my discomfort. But I wasn’t. I was helpless under his control, forced to suck his dick.
Vox moaned softly as he felt my warm, wet mouth around him. He gently pushed further in, taking advantage of my openness and lack of resistance. His hands gripped my hair tightly, guiding me up and down his length. "That's it...”
He then thrusted fully down my throat without warning. I would’ve gagged, but somehow resisted. A good little doll. I should’ve screamed or wretched at the pain. I couldn’t, though. He’d used that stupid trigger phrase and now I was all his.
My mind and body reacted differently. Internally, in the back of my mind, I was screaming. The fog in my head covered that up, though. It hurt, but I couldn’t let that show. I was supposed to be a doll and make him happy, I needed to be a doll and please him. So, I did. I moaned around him, trying to ignore the overwhelming sensation, trying to ignore how he was cutting off my air. I sucked harder.
"My god, you're so good at this," he hissed, his hips jerking wildly as he tried to maintain control. A shiver ran down his spine at the thought of having such a perfect little doll all to himself. "You're so obedient...”
He began moving my head along with his hips. It was suffocating, I could barely breathe as he used me. I moaned again, pushing those feelings aside. He’d told me to make him happy, he told me to please him. So I did.
"Yes," he gasped, his eyes rolling back with pleasure. His hand left my hair to grab mine, guiding it along with him, using both of our hands to control the rhythm of what he was doing. “Feel how hard you're making me?”
I moaned around him, automatically trying to say yes, like a good doll. I choked for a moment, then moaned as I throbbed. I recovered, moaning again and continuing. I could feel him about to climax. If I’d been in my right mind, I’d have prayed he’d pull out before cumming. Right now, I wasn’t. I was focused on pleasing him, and nothing else. Not a single other thought.
"That's it, baby," he panted, his hand clutching my head tightly. His hips jerked violently as he shot his load down my throat, choking me momentarily. "Swallow every drop for me."
It took everything I had not to cough it up. My vision blurred as I obliged, swallowing. It was so hard to breathe.
Vox smirked, his eyes glowing with satisfaction. "You're such a good doll," he whispered as he pulled out of my mouth, his dick still throbbing. "I knew you could please me perfectly."
I immediately hunched over, coughing. I gagged and stopped myself from vomiting. I gasped for air, desperately. He’d pushed me to my limits there, but we both knew he wasn’t done yet. He never was.
"That's right," Vox whispered in my ear, his warm breath sending shivers down my spine. "You remember who's in charge here. Now, why don't you be a doll and climb onto the desk? Be a doll and spread those legs for me."
"Vox.. Vox please," I said quietly. I wanted to say 'stop' but I couldn't, so it lingered in the air between us. I did what he told me to, despite myself. I felt dread building up in me. I didn't want this. I didn't want any of this. It wasn't the first time, but it never got better.
"Please, I don't..." I couldn't finish the sentence. Part of the rules. I couldn't directly object or protest to anything he asked of me. I couldn't say I didn't want it, I couldn't go against his wishes in any way when he used the phrase 'be a doll'. "Vox," I said desperately, his name alone a plea for him to stop. I was on the desk, I'd done as I was told. I wasn't in control of my actions. I hated it. I hated it when he used me like this.
Vox took a deep inhale, his eyes locked on mine as he stroked his thumb over your lips lightly. "You know, doll," he began, his voice soft and tender when it came to me. "You are aware that this is all just for fun, aren't you?"
I shook my head no. It was fun for him, but not for me. Tears stung the edges of my eyes, threatening to fall over. I hated this.
"Look at me, doll," he commanded, and when our eyes met, he brushed the tears away from my cheek with the back of his hand. "You are mine, remember?"
"Yes," I said quietly, my voice shaky.
He smirked at your response, his gaze turning predatory once more. "Then be a doll and behave like it. Be a doll for me, now."
I relaxed more, a sense of calm washing over me. My eyes glazed over and my thoughts became foggy. I was his. No protest, no panic. I was his and now I'd behave like it. I was still completely exposed to him, sitting on his desk with my legs spread open.
I almost wasn't myself anymore. I was his, and I'd bend to his every whim. I was his, and I didn't matter, my feelings didn't matter. I was his, I belonged to him, he was everything, pleasing him was everything, doing what he said was everything. I was his, and he was everything. He was all that mattered.
"Good girl," Vox purred, appreciating the change in my demeanor. He took his phone out, recording me as he stepped closer, his hard cock pressing against my exposed cunt. "Remember, you want this as much as I do, don't you, doll?"
"Yes, Vox," I said softly, making no move to resist. Blush crept into my cheeks at being called a good girl. It didn't matter whether I was in my right mind or not, being called that... "I love you," I said, ignoring the camera. In any other instance I'd be afraid, angry, panicked, but now? He'd told me to behave like I was his, like I was his doll, so I was. I had to.
Vox flashed a wicked grin at my words, his thumb gently stroking my slit as he towered over me. The camera kept rolling, capturing every desperate plea for love and obedience falling from my lips.
"I love you," I said again, slightly breathless. My body was reacting to his touch— something I would've hated if I was thinking properly. But I wasn't. I didn't care about the camera, I didn't care he was using me, I was just his doll to play with. A doll didn't have feelings like that. A doll just focused on being a good toy. "Please, Vox... please, I want you..."
Vox smirked down at me, pleased with my obedience. "You really are a good girl," he purred, his fingers finding their way inside my folds to tease at my sensitive nerves. "Now, remember what I told you about showing me how much you want it?"
"Mmnn.... yes, Vox," I moaned, my pussy beginning to throb at his touch. I gripped the edge of the desk hard, heat rising to my cheeks as I moaned again. "Please, Vox, please..." I begged, my voice a bit airy. "I need you, I want you... I’m nothing without you.... please, Vox, I want you so bad.... please, please..."
Vox leaned in, his mouth brushing against my ear as he whispered hotly, "You're so fucking pretty when you beg." His fingers slid easily into me, stretching and filling me with his touch. "You're getting so wet for me..."
"Ohhh.... Vox please," I moaned, the words falling out of my mouth. Things I never would've usually said coming out against my will. My thoughts were foggy, I could hardly think. "Mmnn," I moaned, pressing myself up against him. I begged and moaned for more, for him. "Please fuck me, darling, please. You're all I need, you're all I want, please, please. I want you, I want you..."
"Oh my dear, you have no idea how much I've wanted this," he muttered against my ear, his grip steady as he pushed inside me slowly, eliciting another moan of pleasure from me. "You truly belong to me, don't you?"
"Yes, Vox... Ohhh," I moaned, arching my back and moving my hips for a better fit. "Please, I'm yours, I belong to you, please," I said, overwhelming pleasure filling my senses. I made small noises, whines and whimpers, and continued to moan for him. "Ohh... ohhh... fuck! Oh god," I groaned, my pussy throbbing. "Ohhh, more... more, please.. please... I belong to you... please... I'm all yours..."
Vox smiled down at me, smug that he'd gotten me to be so submissive so easily, with just the use of the single tigger phrase. His grip on my hips tightened as he began to thrust into me, his cock sliding easily in and out as I arched my back and moaned his name.
"Vox..." I moaned, gripping the edge of the desk tighter, my nails digging into the wood. I was nearing my peak, again. I moaned louder. He'd set aside his phone, but he had cameras in his office, in this room, recording everything from every angle. He always did. I'd be crying right about now, if I could. I'd be screaming, frustrated, angry. But I was his doll. for now, and he wasn't going to allow that. So, I played the role he wanted. I moaned his name again.
Vox growled softly, his fingers digging into my hips as he took me roughly, throwing my head back with every thrust. "That's it, my pet. Show me how much you need me." His voice was low and commanding, his gaze locked onto mine.
"Ah, ah... ohhh, Vox," I moaned, my lips quivering. my hands twitched and I gripped the desk hard, dragging my nails across it, leaving more marks. I moaned again and gasped, feeling myself reach my peak.
Vox's thrusts slowed as he felt me release, his cock twitching and pulsing inside me as he finally came as well, filling me up with his seed. "My beautiful doll," he whispered, leaning down to capture my lips in a slow, deep kiss.
I moaned one more time, then sighed, taking in the blissful feeling spreading through me.
"You did well, my dear. Exactly as I wanted," he purred, leaning down to kiss my neck softly. "Come, let's tidy up and clean ourselves. Then maybe we could cuddle and watch TV for a bit?"
"Yeah," I said with a nod. I looked at him, meeting his eyes again. Mine were still glazed over, and now that we'd officially finished, I'd returned to the quiet doll I was, since he'd used the trigger phrase. He hadn't given the word to allow me to return to normal again. I was very much unlike myself because of it.
"Perfect," he said with a grin. He snapped his fingers and all the cameras turned off, done recording. He was pleased with himself, and how he'd be able to use that footage in the further to keep me in line. Not that it was likely that it'd ever be necessary. "Hm," Vox said, his gaze becoming thoughtful. He paused for a moment and ran his fingers through my hair, examining my expression. It felt off to him, empty.
I didn't lean into his touch like I normally would. I didn't nuzzle up against him. I didn't speak. I was still a little doll, with a small, perfect soft smile fixed on my face. Unnatural. He was used to having me- the real me, the one in her right mind- with him afterwards, after this.
Vox frowned slightly, his fingers trailing lightly over my cheek. "What's wrong, darling?" He asked softly, tilting his head to the side. He couldn't quite place what it was about me that seemed off, but he could feel it nonetheless.
"Nothing," I said lightly. Unnatural for me. Usually I'd be flirty after we fucked, or gentle, or clingy. Right now, I was none of those things. I was his doll, not myself. That alone was vaguely unsettling for him, in this moment. It wasn't so wrong to him when he made me like this to fuck me without my consent, but for me to be like this afterwards? It felt odd. He didn't like it.
"I'm just your doll. I belong to you," I said, reciting what he said when using the trigger phrase to get me like this.
"Ah," Vox's eyes narrowed slightly, studying me for a moment. His gaze softened as he continued to gently caress my cheek. "That's my good girl." When I didn't react, it hit him. His eyes widened and he chuckled, looking over at me again. "So that's the problem, hm? I can't believe I forgot," he said, laughing again. He looked at me with a warm smile and cupped my face gently. "Be a doll and return to normal, my love."
I closed my eyes and the smile dropped from my face. I leaned against him as I came back into my own. My hand twitched and I shifted slightly, trying to get used to being in control again. My mind was racing as the fog cleared from my head, emotions barreling into me as I tried to process what had just happened.
Vox watched as I returned to my normal self, his smile widening. He could feel the shift in energy as I leaned against him, trying to adjust to being in control again. His hands gently moved down my back, comfortingly massaging as he spoke softly. "There we go, doll." He said, as if he hadn't just overridden my free will to fuck me. As if he hadn't just raped me and recorded the entire thing.
I tensed and held him tightly. Despite everything, he was my only source of comfort right now. This wasn't the first time this had happened. This probably would happen again. I buried my head against his chest, still completely exposed, slightly dazed. I cried.
Vox wrapped his arms around me, holding me close as he could feel my tears soaking into his shirt. He didn't mind the slight discomfort it caused him; after all, he had pushed me to my limits once again. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to my head.
I cried harder, sobs raking through my body. I clung to him, seeking reassurance and protection. I stayed with him, despite it all.
#hazbin hotel#vox#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin vox#writing#vox x reader#my writing#x reader#vox x fem reader#Vox x fem!reader#Vox x doll!reader#vox is in hell for a reason#smut#sorry guys#be a doll
16 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello I stumbled across your profile and I just say I love your art style! I've gotta ask, how'd your develop it? And do you have any advice for someone who can't decide what they want their art to look like?
Thank you so much!
To be entirely honest, I don't feel like I truly "developed" my style. I feel a lot more like I finally let myself draw it! But I am incredibly deliberate with my work, and I do have clear tendencies and preferences... So I'll do my best to explain how I got to where I am now as an artist.
It's important to remember that "style" is something of a nebulous concept. It changes with you as you grow as a person, and most artists can work in and emulate many art styles! Art really is a form of communication with yourself, and your "style" is a reflection of the tendencies and preferences you have. My art does not look how it looked 5 years ago, and my art will look different 5 years from now too. I've changed, and my art reflects that!
(2012, 2018, 2023; two pieces I remember being incredibly proud of and considered my best work up til that point, and then my most recent piece)
What you need to do, as everyone will tell you, is study the fundamentals (anatomy, perspective, form and structure, lighting and shadow, color, and composition) so you have the proper tools to make the most informed decisions possible about your art, and so you can deliberately break or follow rules as you please for your desired effect. I know it sounds silly to learn rules if you're not gonna be following them anyways, but they help you be much more consistent and intentional! More knowledge is NEVER a bad thing to have!
However, I know it's a bit demoralizing to just be told to study fundamentals. Everyone knows you're supposed to do that, but it takes YEARS to learn, and people want their art to feel how they want it to now (which is very very very normal to want!)
So on that front, I have 2 follow up suggestions that I personally find helpful (of course, everyone is different, so it's not like this is the only way to learn! But, if it resonates with you, it might mean it will work for you too.)
1: Separate study from application
I believe this is beneficial for a few reasons:
If the goal of every piece is learning, it can become frustrating, overwhelming, and boring
It's harder to self critique when there are multiple variables to investigate. I like to study one fundamental at a time
Study (usually) works best with a large quantity of output, whereas application of knowledge (finished pieces) is often more satisfying and effective when you get to take your time
Deliberate practical application of what you've learned in a finished piece helps cement the learning in your mind, and also lets you get satisfying finished pieces with noticeable improvement after a good study session!
I've found that keeping these things separate helps me improve faster and more deliberately, and it takes a lot of the pressure off of both aspects! I'm not worried about my studies looking beautiful, they're just to learn! And I don't feel pressured to critique my finished pieces, cause they're just for fun and to make something pretty. I personally find this helps me have a much healthier relationship with my art.
When studying, copy! Copy things as best as you can, all the time. It gives you something to compare to for self critique (and of course, if you're copying someone else's work and you share the study, ALWAYS give credit, share the original, and say it was for study.) In application, don't copy: reference. Make it yours!
2: Let yourself do the things that feel "easy" or like "cheating"
This one is simpler: nothing in art is easy.
If something feels easy to you, most of the time it's not because it's actually any easier... It's because it's part of your natural tendencies and preferences! This took me forever to realize, but as long as you're actually doing some study, then you're learning. You don't need to learn All The Time. When you're doing the "application" portion, you should let yourself do whatever is actually the most fun and feels easiest! This is where your style will start to come through, and where you get to learn about yourself. Take the pressure off, and have fun!!!
The only cheating in art is theft. If you're not stealing, then it's allowed!
My whole life (and yes, still!) I'd get regular criticism about both my style and my subject matter. You will too. You'll see a thousand different styles, and a hundred different things to admire in each. Your heart will ache that you don't draw like others do.
But art is a form of communication with yourself. It's like your voice, or your accent; just something that's a part of you! It can be fun to mimic others', but when you sit to have a conversation you speak naturally. (I know some people want to and do change their voice, but this is a metaphor and metaphors aren't perfect)
Don't stress so much about what you want your art to look like, especially if you're not sure. There's a lot of value to be had in constant experimentation, I think it'd be rather boring to only draw one style the rest of my life. What I draw is what I want to see, right now, for who I am now! It's a part of me and comes naturally, if I let it!
I hope this helps!
#justbrowsing1124#asks#art tips#drawing advice#drawing tips#art advice#long post here sorry#long post#I could have gone on so so so so so so much more but this took me like 2 hours to write#and I've gotta go to bed! haha#so if you feel like something wasn't properly explained you can send a follow up ask and I'd be happy to elaborate#I love answering questions like this#sorry if it sounds a bit condescending I wrote the post for like... what would have helped me to hear when I was just starting out#so I wrote it basically for how I think would help I guess a kid#sorry about that. the content is still all what I think though#also I realize that i didn't really talk about like... my journey... at all here lol.#I guess if you wanna know my personal journey I'd love to get into it!#but i focused a lot more on the second part#cause yknow#that's kinda what my journey was internally anyways#but yknow no fun progress of my art with notes about what I was doing and why#but fuck that sounds fun if someone did wanna know about that LOL#I am VERY deliberate with my art I could legit analyze every piece#pretentious? maybe. do I care? not at all.#why make it if I dont have a reason?
107 notes
·
View notes
Text
they werent lying that knuckles series barely has knuckles in it
#i pirated that shit Btw just so we're clear. also gonna talk about it a little bit in the tags#nothing too spoilery but also might not wanna read if you want to go in knowing absolutely nothing? idk#anyway he WAS a main character still he was present for a decent amount of the first couple episodes#but the amount of screentime he gets just starts dropping after that . hes barely there at all in the second half ???#and it feels like theres a lot of scenes mostly focusing on wade and his problems and not near as many for knuckles and his whole deal#overall it feels more like a wade show with knuckles in it than a knuckles show with wade in it. which sucks#and human characters having plot relevance isnt the problem here i dont mind human characters at all i think they can be really fun#its the fact that the human characters are taking over the story and spotlight when the show is called knuckles#and all the marketing makes it look like knuckles is the main focus#and i also would have preferred if they just went with a differnet character to be knuckles' human friend#because i dont particulraly care about wade. and the knuckles (and sonic and tails) i know would not be friends with cops </3#well at least the story wasnt knuckles training wade to be a better cop like a lot of people were expecting but thats like.the bare minimum#also aside from the issues relating to knuckles' screentime (or lack of screentime) i thought the ending was unsatisfying#regardless of all that though there WERE some parts i enjoyed or found kind of funny or whatever. because knuckles so cutesy as always#knuckles being a cute little guy is the most important part of the show actually#and i liked the parts with sonic tails and maddie even if they were only there for like 5 minutes#(i really wish those three had gotten more screentime. i feel like they could have easily worked in at least one more scene with them)#and its a minor thing but the opening sequence is cute. was honestly expecting just a title card or something#overall the show is just . kind of okay i guess. not the worst thing ive ever seen but still disappointing ? idk how to explain..#my expectations also werent very high in the first place#so maybe im being a bit more generous than i would have been otherwise. idk#and i definitely would not recommend this to anyone who already dislikes the sonic movies . youll probably hate this more#like people who thought the human characters got too much screentime in the second movie would lose their minds if they saw this
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
I really need to get serious about personal projects again
#I think I said something like this last year too lol#currently in a weird headspace about it#the biggest reason why I lost focus on them was bc I prioritized engaging in fandom#(something that I never really did when I was focused on publishing a few years back)#so part of me feels like in order to make considerable progress on projects again I need to cut myself off from fandom#and I kinda have been weening myself off a bit from animanga but not really for that reason#it was mostly bc I was getting overwhelmed by how much I was consuming and I wanted to appreciate things fully#I don’t think I’d cut myself off from fandom completely either I’d still try to keep up with stuff#but the idea of not engaging in fandom anymore kinda.. scares me?#idk I feel like a major loser admitting this lol#it just feels like I’d lose a lot of connections with people#and would lose a lot of the love I have for stories if I’m not actively interacting with them :(#and then there’s also that stupid feeling of being a ‘fake fan’ because I’m not dedicating every single second of free time to fandom#which is dumb bc like I have a life and need to make money yknow I got things to do#im just Stressed bc I’m at such a critical stage career wise and im getting closer to 26 so hhhhh healthcare coverage will be up in the air#so I really can’t afford to dawdle#there’s just so much I wanna do and while I’m not necessarily racing to get it done I still want to take advantage of the time I have#but it also sucks feeling like I’m giving up a part of myself to progress on another part of myself#I don’t think any of this makes sense sorry I just needed to dump my thoughts bc I am Terrified™️#anyway personal projects! gotta get back to those !#blahblahbills#delete later
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
i do think the whole "gale is a slowburn romance" thing is very funny bc like. i get being concerned whether or not you're on the right path for his romance on a first playthrough when you don't know his big confession is in act 2, but still calling it a slowburn just bc you don't fuck in act 1 is . it sure is
#sure it takes an act and a half (more or less depending on how long it takes you to get his scene)#but it still doesn't feel like 'slowburn' fits to me#like... ast*ri*n (censoring so it stays out of tags. hopefully) could probably be considered a slowburn#for how much of it isn't genuine Romance but rather him manipulating you#as i understand it l*ez*l's big emotional moment happens in act 3#meanwhile g*le is genuinely into you Early and so devoted from the confession onward#there's just . uh. Other factors at play there keeping him from acting on it before act 2#i think it also feels a bit like... focusing so much on just getting the confession and the sex scene is the exact opposite of#how the romances were designed in the first place#you know the whole 'you're not Winning a sex scene as the end of the romance' thing or however they phrased it#like certain (cough) series (cough cough) that shall remain unnamed (hacking wheezing)#yeah i think that's it. my issue is probably that some of the people calling it a slowburn don't actually mean a Slowburn#bc there are other romances that would qualify way more#they just mean it takes a while to get his sex scene lmao
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
morality in the world of good omens
so i wrote another (admittedly very messy) essay on good omens not long ago right after watching season 2 but after finishing that, rewatching all of both seasons multiple times, and reading through the book, i have a couple more distinct ideas to get out...somewhere...if only for my own sanity. this is me throwing my thoughts into the internet before i pop, if you will. just 3 sections, below the cut.
1. environment, characters, & transformative fandom creations
to start this post off a bit more broadly, i've been thinking a lot recently about transformative fandom and the reasons why we write fanfiction/create semi-original works in the first place, as well as why certain aspects of fandom (writing, art, analysis, etc.) will be more appealing to me for certain shows/series than others. correct me if you have a totally different view of this, but in my experience i've found that i tend to naturally gravitate towards different parts of fandom depending on what the original medium of the story was- podcasts tend to lead to some of the most interesting art trends, for example, since there's more room for interpretation and character design tends to be more of an ongoing community project than something set in stone like for a tv show with live human actors.
in my own observation, i've noticed that a lot of the really big & excitable fandoms, the ones that generate tons & tons of fanworks more naturally (a.k.a. just because of the story itself & not other factors like a pre-existing franchise or hype about new great gay representation, etc.) tend to surround stories that fall into a kind of "sweet spot" that makes the creation of fanworks really appealing. if you've ever wondered why there are so many ravenous artists bending over backwards to draw gorgeous fanart for stuff like homestuck or south park or even minecraft youtubers, it's likely because those stories all fall into a sweet spot for drawing, with character designs that are recognizable at a glance and yet still simple enough that there is plenty of room for personal creative touches. (think also, if you're familiar with such kinds of homestuck terms: hyperflexible mythologies, A4:1524, and/or this archive link cause the official thing is down now for some reason)
the conclusion i've come to is thus that even something as basic as the original medium of a story can dictate a lot about what kinds of fan activities are more common or popular within said story's fandom.
so, back to good omens- for me, this all relates back because of a question i've been messing with in my head recently, about why i've been less interested in fanfiction for good omens than i have been for the last few fandoms i've been, almost all of which have basically broken my ao3 bookmarks.
this question has been fucking with me for a while now, largely because i'm not entirely sure what's motivating it. a lot of times i can figure out pretty easily why i might personally not be interested in some parts of fandom, but that's not really the case here. from what i've seen this fandom seems to be pretty mixed in terms of age, & the writing that i have read is certainly no worse than i've seen elsewhere, perhaps even better in some places- and yet, i can't seem to get entirely into it, even getting frustrated as i can't find something to my tastes for an ao3 bedtime story as i've grown so accustomed. what caught me off guard is that this was an issue that i ran into while watching season 1 as well, back when the series was still quite popular but not blowing up like it is right now.
a lot of this may seem like (and likely is, at least in part) basic overthinking, but i mentioned it all here because the answer i eventually came to is reminiscent of my previous reflections above on the nature of fandom & how/why fanworks are created.
a couple paragraphs above, i used the example of art as an example of how fandoms that generate a lot of original artwork will often do the most when the original story falls into a sweet spot of character design, but notably i think that this sentiment applies to a lot more than just art. if you've ever seen the copious amounts of kpop & hockey rpf fanfiction that lives on ao3, it should be clear that this applies to writing too.
i wrote this essay a while back responding to an observation about the lack of a more extensive symbolic language in fanfiction & i've toyed around with the idea more since, particularly in considering the question of why a lot of what we see as the staples of fanfiction exist in the first place. in that post, my response largely revolved around an argument of why we create fanfiction- namely, that fanfiction is created as in tandem with deeper analysis of the original story/series, as a way of trying to practically apply character analysis to a new context.
the key part of that last sentence to me is how a lot of this revolves around character analysis (and shipping, but really it's the characters that motivate the shipping in most cases so. same difference).
i tend to instinctively separate fanfiction into two separate categories: fanfiction that is based out of the original world/canon of the story (including but not limited to fix-its, deeper analysis fics that take a scene & extrapolate from it, continuations, etc.) and fanfiction that takes the characters from the original story & plops them in an alternate universe/AU. while i separate these out as two distinct categories of fanfiction, i should also clarify that i don't think these two groups are necessarily equal in terms of number of fics- rather, the vast majority of fanfiction tends to be AUs, keeping the original characters & changing any & all aspects of the world around them. again, this may vary depending on the story & Vibe of the fandom at the time, stories like game of thrones or harry potter or homestuck might have a lot more in the canon category by nature of any major dissatisfactions the fandom has with how the original story was told, but in most cases AUs are more popular. this was a lot of the basis behind my argument that fanfiction is created as character analysis in fact, since the characters are the most important part that carries over from original story to fanwork, as well as can end up being one of the most debated/scorned parts when it comes to fandom drift (i.e. "that's out of character"/"he wouldn't do that"/and all other such arguments about fanon vs. canon characterization).
basically, my conclusion in this case was that i was a lot less interested in gomens fic largely because i have a really hard time separating the characters from the world in the case of this particular story. aziraphale & crowley being an angel & a demon and dealing with all of the bullshit of their world when it comes to heaven & hell are such integral parts of their characters in my mind that i have a much harder time getting behind AU fanfiction that plops them in a totally different context. it's just a much harder sell for keeping the characters in character for me. (i also tend to not like s2 fix-its just cause, idk they're just not my style, which is where a lot of the recent blast of energy has led us.) to clarify, this is not a judgement, just a matter of personal preference and a reflection of why, even if a lot of fandoms will look the same from the outside/involve the same things like art, fic, etc., an individual's mileage can vary wildly when it comes to how they interact with different things online.
*additional note, also for clarification: i do want to acknowledge that a lot of this depends on pure popularity as well, popular fandoms will often end up with basically everything in terms of fanworks just by nature of how many people are interacting with & thinking deeply about the story. my point here is more along the lines of the fact that even within the more well-populated fandoms, certain types of fanwork will often Stick Out more to me than others, or even be visibly much more common than in other fandoms, due largely to the original medium/structure of how the story.
so, speaking of aziraphale & crowley in more depth now- why does the world of good omens feel like such an integral part of their personalities when it comes to characterization? up next, let's talk about morality within the context of good omens' perhaps surprisingly secular take on heaven & hell.
2. the amorality of heaven & hell (ft. the crowley quote apples you know the one)
(warning in advance that this section may be a bit limited since i'm not going to get super far (or very far at all, really) into the whole religious-analysis aspect of good omens.)
i've been binge-reading the original pterry & gaiman book for good omens over the last few days and it's been very fun seeing all the slight changes between the tv show & the original. you can really see the hand of the original creators in how the tv show was translated, even just by looking at which parts made it and which parts were deemed worth cutting out. i suppose having one of the original creators right there helping build everything really helps make a book -> show translation work, since the ASOUE tv series was also pretty well received- something about knowing what's the core of the series & truly important to keep in, and having more time to tell the story itself?
anyways, i have a short list of notes that i've been taking as i read, conversations that stand out to me or footnotes that particularly amused me, but i keep coming back to one line that stood out to me quite early on. in context, this line comes from crowley during the conversation where he is first attempting to fully convince aziraphale about stopping armageddon, specifically when they're talking about exerting equal forces on warlock to make him normal:
"You're saying the child isn't evil of itself?" [Aziraphale] said slowly.
"Potentially evil. Potentially good, too, I suppose. Just this huge powerful potentiality, waiting to be shaped," said Crowley. He shrugged. "Anyway, why're we talking about this good and evil? They're just names for sides. We know that."
(pg. 67)
"They're just names for sides." if i had to pick one line to sum up the view on religious morality of this series, this would likely be it.
on the one hand, i tend to interpret a lot gomens' take on heaven & hell within the context of its political stance, something that is particularly obvious through a line from gabriel in s2e2 where he tries to clarify to aziraphale that heaven isn't trying to hurt job directly, but instead is just not stopping hell from doing horrible things to him. while there may be some additional nuance to add to this take within the context of british politics that i don't really know well enough to add about, i'm inclined to see this from the side of my own familiar american politics, which might hold some weight considering how long mr. gaiman's lived around here. point is, my current interpretation of that line is that it helps in more clearly establishing the analogy of heaven & hell as the story moves forward into newer seasons and thus more contemporary politics, equating heaven with mainstream liberal politics & politicians and hell with conservatives.
this stance seems to be emphasized even more in the tv show than the book which makes sense considering its been coming out more recently, and especially in season 2 which is still quite caught up in a lot of quarantine-based reflection. (the tv show puts a lot more emphasis on heaven & hell in general, actually, perhaps initially a byproduct of actually being able to see those environments in their entirety and all the angels & demons that populate them- but we'll get to that.)
the book takes a slightly different stance that, fittingly, seems more reflective of the time it came out. in particular, i was struck a lot more when reading the book by adam's rise (fall?) to power, and how much of it was motivated by a burgeoning nervousness/pessimism about climate change and the anxieties of younger generations that comes with inheriting an earth that feels so fucked up. honestly if anything it's only gotten more relevant in that respect, what with the current vibe on the internet & the hopelessness of the doomer gen z gang, but it also has a distinctly different flavor to me from the tv show, which i think is largely because it's less connected to Formal politics since again we see a whole lot less of heaven & hell as such distinct, bureaucratic entities.
instead, there is a very distinctly amoral aspect to heaven & hell that we get through lines like the one above and especially from characters like crowley. this is why i argue that good omens, despite having so many religious elements, is such a deeply secular take, especially when it comes to its ethics & morality- Good and Evil, notably with the capital letters in this case, has very little to do with actual actions and much more to do with the name that you stamp on top of said actions. heaven & hell and the angels & demons that we see directing and watching and generally fucking with aziraphale & crowley throughout the story are distinctly separate from humanity, and as we see even more as the story progresses, distinctly unaware about what it even means to be a human, in both a deeper philosophical & very basic and literal sense. Good and Evil is simply another name for the sides- and thus the true ethics is something separate, and based in a deeply human experience.
in my opinion this is also why aziraphale & crowley, lovers of humanity and also to some degree spokespersons of it from how much they've "gone native," tend to be so deeply at odds with both heaven & hell and always end up agreeing with each other over their own supposed sides. what makes aziraphale & crowley so distinctly different is that they ascribe to the same ethics & morality that humanity does, or at the very least are trying to figure out ethics & morality & How to Be a Good Person in the same horribly messy way that humans do, separating them from the black & white "this side Good & this side Bad," logic that the rest of heaven & hell instinctively ascribe to.
there's a lot of nuance here, which is also why i think there is such an emphasis on moral ambiguity (and love, but we'll get to that) throughout season 2. the story of job, grave robbing, & questionable attempts at matchmaking- aziraphale is working through a lot of Shit right now when it comes to trying to figure out what the Good thing actually fucking is, and i think it's key that a lot of that is motivated by crowley himself. crowley might'e been cast out of heaven for asking too many questions, but aziraphale is there & listening to them & giving them the serious thought they deserve, and that can't be overlooked.
sidenote: i couldn't figure out a place to shove this in, but i also wanna point out that a lot of this is tied to the idea of growing over time too. on the same page as the quote transcribed above is another line from crowley leading up to aziraphale's question that puts a lot of emphasis on the fact that warlock is going to be a product of nurture, not nature. again, this is an argument against basic black & white assigned-at-birth morality for the ability of humans to grow & change over time and be influenced by the people around them.
it's notable that despite adam's supposed origin as a Son of Satan, what really gets him to stop the apocalypse in the end is the fact that he doesn't really give a shit about all this big plans but instead just wants to hang around his friends. there's a lot of emphasis in the book placed on how beautiful & nice tadfield is as a place for a young kid to grow up, how well loved & fiercely protected it as as something beloved to adam. while he might be overwhelmed when faced with the full picture of how horrible the world can be, ultimately what he cares about is loving & taking care of the people & places that he grew up learning were precious, and the only way to do that is to keep growing & changing yourself within that world and trying to help it also grow into something better, not throw it all away just for the slightest chance that you could restart. a message worth taking the time to think about, at the absolute very least.
3. finding morality w/in humanity: crowley & aziraphale and speculation for s3
i have complicated feelings about both aziraphale & crowley throughout a lot of the show and especially in season 2. i think a lot of people, myself included, are inclined to see crowley as the voice of reason in this season, and for good reason- as i mentioned before, a lot of aziraphale's deeper questioning of the status quo and goodness (Goodness) as a whole is motivated by questions from crowley.
i kiiind of mentioned this in my previous essay, but to state it more clearly, my take on crowley is that he's arriving at the right answer for the wrong reasons, and, conversely, aziraphale is arriving at the wrong answer for... kind of also the wrong reasons but also slightly for the right reasons. let me explain.
crowley is clearly much more aware of the flaws in both heaven & hell than aziraphale is, which seems to be the basis behind a lot of his motivation in asking aziraphale so many questions in the first place. he's also, as maggie & nina point out in s2e6, deeply lonely, often running away or getting ready to fight literally anyone that isn't aziraphale (or humans, but that's a little more complicated). from his reaction to beelz & gabriel getting together, i think it's pretty clear that he still hasn't entirely given up on the whole alpha centauri idea, and it makes sense- as i said in that last essay, crowley basically won the argument at the end of the previous season when it comes to aziraphale & crowley, "making [their] own side," so he doesn't have much reason to face any of his personal fears until maggie & nina basically point out that they exist directly to his face. once they do point it out, however, he's very motivated to act & does so almost immediately, even after hearing what aziraphale has to tell him and being pretty thoroughly devastated by it.
my point here is that crowley is correct in seeing the toxicity of both heaven & hell, he's just flawed and largely motivated by fear (up for debate if that's all it is, but i certainly think it's a big part of it) in his desire to run away from it all. it's not quite armageddon, again he's going more flight > fight here, but he's still ultimately giving up and that's not a great conclusion.
on the other hand, as some others on this site have pointed out, aziraphale is certainly showing a lot of strength in his willingness to keep fighting & try to change things for the better, but it's not hard to see how that belief has been twisted. one of aziraphale's biggest flaw in motivation at this point imo is that he doesn't just believe in goodness but Goodness, the kind that's tied to heaven always being right & all actions being morally Good so long as they're done under the name of heaven, and that clearly also isn't great.
thus what i think the both of these two really need ultimately is that deeper connection to humanity, and the ethics born from humans interacting with humans. we can already see how strong these two are when they collaborate, even when they're doing their absolute best to be as subtle as possible, but what i think they need is to once again be grounded by humanity, not to get so caught up in the bullshittery of heaven & hell and Good & Evil, but once again find a goodness defined by the world that they mutually love so much and stick with it.
i keep tossing a question around in my head about whether or not aziraphale & crowley are going to end up human by the end of this series. it feels natural that they would, they're already so at home and in love with earth & around humanity, but i'm also not entirely sure if that would be a happy ending for them considering how long they've watched & loved the world as it's changed. perhaps taking this post into account is another push towards humanity as a happy ending, not running away to a cottage to get away from the world (i just can't see running away to a cottage to be together as as happy ending, sorry- it might work for beelz & gabriel but not for aziraphale & crowley), but choosing to settle down within that world that is so dear.
#'just three sections' LAFFS. YEAH#astronaut rambles#good omens#gomens#no but i like this one a lot better than the last attempt at a gomens essay#this one feels a lot cleaner. more focused?#got a bit sappy at the end but i don't mind humanity is always worth loving#also off topic but i read this really interesting paper at work the other day#about pratchett’s writing in discworld & zizek & religion#forget what it’s called now but it was an interesting take on how fiction/fantasy can allow for deeper insights/reflection of reality#got some discworld books today so looking forward to reading those once i slurp up the last hundred or so pages of good omens#also thanks to my dad for having some interesting commentary on the job interpretation in s2e2 today#i all but literally slept through sunday school so i think a lot of the more noteworthy religion takes in this show go over my head =3=‘’#man i am so very much looking forward to how season 3 continues this story#i feel like a lot of the big conclusions there are really gonna be important for the direction of the story’s main message#season 2 is just. such a transition season it’s hard to get super distinct conclusions sometimes#like it’s still going somewhere there’s shit developing#it’s not like sherlock where it just teases deeper meaning forever but gives you nothing#but. it’s just so obviously Not Over Yet and I Need More#anyways much love i need to go to bed now arghfjdkd lots of shit to do in the future but all i wanna do is keep writing gomens essays. sigh#brainrot central#oh yay my phone’s at 69% now ☺️ wheeee#good omens meta
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
now bc of that one post abt zelda getting fridged whenever that one guy directs a zelda game im thinking abt tetra just getting turned to stone in ph and like. what would it have been like if she were an actual character in ph. what would she have done how would this have changed the story
#not gonna do a whole lot of tagging im just musing. if you wanna rb or reply with ideas thats great#im not the person to figure this out bc i dont actually care much abt tetra#not like oh i hate her but like. i only played ph and what i see of her beyond that has not endeared me to her#shes fine i just dont get it. ig cuz i didnt play ww but eh#cuz like. ok. pretty much the majority of phs plot relies on tetra having been turned to stone and fixing that#and me being the autistic little freak i am the psrt that also makes it hard for me to wonder what could happen if#tetra werent stone and that making the game better is like. ok what about linebeck and his arc#listen his arc is so fucking good and hes great and i dont think his arc would have been so good if link wasnt the character he was put wit#cuz link is a great foil and despite having minimal characterization has just the right personality to nudge linebeck along#cuz hes def part of what inspires some of that change in linebeck so idk what might have happened#if tetra was an active player interacting with him in ph too. cuz like idk most of the time when i see people#do stuff where they interact its usually tetra one upping linebeck or whatever and thars like. ok thats whar ciela does#maybe im reading into it too much and focusing on linebeck. idk how you couldve done and changed#the plot of ph to include tetra without just straight up rewriting the whole thing or putting link away#bc look me in the eyes. i do not think linebeck would have developed the way he did without having met link specifically#salty talks#idk i feel like linebecks arc is the best bit of story in ph so i want that to remain more or less intact bc thats where a lot of#the emotional stuff comes in at the end. his dialogue in the ghost ship battle and the final boss. its important#i dont think about tetra much cant you tell. so id leave this to someone who actually cares abt her as a character
9 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
griot-of-wakanda
Mining for Vibranium
nezzfiction
Writing...
sheldricklawfirm
The Sheldrick Law Firm
dvddggs
eliza i've got so much on my spleen
thekissthesmile
the kiss, the smile