#i should have done better | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

clits-and-clips · 28 days

Text

Spiralling AGAIN would you believe it

#txt #trying to figure it out #i tried to be there for jim and listen to him and be a good partner #but he barely opened up #i didnt know he wanted to leave me #he chose to open up when i was mad #so i didnt respond #so that i didnt yell #not that that is his fault #i should have done better #but i couldny #in that house #i was so overstimulated all the fucking tome #time #like always #and i didnt even realise it #until he kicked me put #out*#and now im just guilty over everything.#why wasnt i better #why cpuldnt i be better #its not fair that he didnt tell me #3 months and you really couldnt tell me what was on your mind #thats unfair man #i was trying so hard to be better #to do better #giving him space is almost impossible #hes my best friend and my soul mate #i dont want to talk to anyone else tbh #so being ignored is like a knife to my chest and idk what to do about it and this is my last tag i can put it and i just dont even know

13 notes · View notes

softshuji · 10 months

Text

I lost my 50/50 to Jean but I got skyward harp with it so did I really lose....?

#IM SORRY KAZUHA IM SO SORRY #I SHOULD HAVE DONE BETTER #MY BABY BOY #however #hehe #im guaranteed for scara now

2 notes · View notes

lazarusstumbles · 3 months

Text

87% 89% 90% 90% do you people want me to kill myself.

#mine #fuckkkkk me??? fuck me. fuck #i should have done better

0 notes

catofoldstones · 6 months

Text

I don’t think the forgiveness is for the abuser. I think the forgiveness is for you for “allowing” yourself to get abused

#because the number of people I have seen who vilify themselves for having being abused is just too damn high #it’s always I should’ve known better #i should have done better #but it was never your fault sweetie #this is not on yourself #and till you figure that out and believe that #forgive yourself #you got this #gentle

1 note · View note

ducktollers · 3 months

Text

best friends

#valentines day #love puppy #love kitten #webkinz #digital art #id in alt text #my art #ik i said i would do raccoons again but i remembered ive been meaning to draw webkinz love puppy idk #this was mostly an excuse to experiment w brushes and textures. experiment failed i still hate them #my battle w procreate is ongoing 🔪#idk i feel like i should keep a tradition of valentines day drawings #HOPEFULLY now that school is done. maybe ill finally have the mental bandwidth to draw in october #which is way better than february 😑

3K notes · View notes

inkskinned · 1 year

Text

oh you know it's all latestage capitalism but the thing is. how are you supposed to be a person inside of this. a person trying to be a better version of yourself.

oh, you started working young, which was kind of hard, but it's just the way stuff works sometimes. and it was 2008 and your family couldn't afford heat. but it's fine, you grow a spine and get used to the professional world and besides it was the suburbs we're talking about here, like, your life could have been actually hard, so what if your father lost his job and you can't afford to move or turn the lights back on. and once you start making money, it's good. you keep doing that. because now they're relying on you. so you have to do that.

oh you were in thousands of dollars of debt at 17 years old so that you could go to school, because you have to go to school if you want to get a "real" job. you even did it "right", you worked parttime and attended community college before you transferred to a public school. you were under so many merit scholarships.

which is fine. you pick yourself up and you say like, okay. i graduated college. i'm holding down a job. i'm doing the Adult Thing, which looks and acts like this, according to all the books i've read. you start with the shitty job and then you climb that corporate ladder.

but the shitty job doesn't cover rent and you stretch yourself too-thin so you get sick. good luck with that. the shitty job no longer pays for your meals. everyone asks why you don't just move, but there's nowhere to move to. and with what money are you going to be moving? and then the loans come back, because they were never going to forgive them, because you were 17 and trying to do the right thing, which was stupid. people are now saying you shouldn't have even gone to school.

which is fine. but because you have no other option, so you do the shitty job, and you apply every day for like 5 new ones, and despite the fact everyone says "there's no one who wants to work!" it's actually just that nobody is fucking hiring so you can either work for 13 dollars an hour in the shitty place you know (where at least you have a passingly friendly relationship with the manager) or you can start from scratch again with a different 13 dollars an hour without knowing how much abuse from the new job you'll be taking.

and if you quit you lose your insurance. if you quit you lose your housing. if you quit, you'll be another burnout kid. the lazy ones. these assholes, look at them!

and you come home to a family dinner and you hear from your father the same old thing. how he worked hard at his job and yes it sucked for a while but he was able to provide for the family and then the house and the dog and the rest of barbie's dream vacation. how the insurance did cover some of it. how you just really need to start speaking up more in manager conversations so they know you're a go-getter. you want to tell him - did you know we're actually doing more now hourly than any previous generation? - but you can't remember where you heard that statistic, and you're far too tired for the fucking argument. and then he starts in on his usual bit. where's the house? where's your kids? where's your ambition.

the same job the same money the same hours doesn't do it anymore. the same nose-to-the-grindstone now just shreds your face off. there's no such thing as upwards mobility, not really. and as far as you're aware, the money certainly is not trickling. you do the soulless stupid shit you signed up for because you fucking have to or else you literally risk your life (food, the apartment, the insurance), but it's not getting you anything. you download the stupid "save more" app and you budget and you do every right thing and then the price of eggs is 7 dollars and you say - oh great! another thing i have to fucking worry about now!

and you go to your stupid job and everyone in your father's generation just tells you to be better about being an adult. they have their homes and their savings account and their bailout and they say. well have you tried not drinking starbucks. well your generation just spends too much on clothing. well you might just be too addicted to travelling. and you - because you need the job - you bite your tongue and don't say i am being held prisoner and you're suggesting i stop pacing my cell if i don't like the scenery and you don't say what the fuck do you think i've been doing with my money and you don't say i haven't spent a cent on something nice in literally forever much less coffee you arrogant asshole. you open and close your bank app and check your loans and check your credit score and check fucking zillow and ziprecruiter and apartments.com just one time more. and still they give you that demeaning little grin and say - see, what you need is -

what you need is for your meds to stop being so fucking expensive. what you need is for the housing bubble to explode into dust. what you need is for billionaires to choke on their wealth. what you need is actual help. what you will get is more economic advice from people who are older-and-wiser.

and above you, almost in a glimmer, you can see the wedged smile of your debt getting toothier, wider.

#i hate when people try to tell me i didn't do it right #what should i have done better #i did it ALL the right way #(not that there is a right way)#it's just that others feel comfortable believing that THEY did it the right way and that's how they made money #whereas i must have just committed a sin somewhere in there! i MUST be doing it wrong!!!#and i'm not a victim!!! im simply experiencing consequences!#and im like. where . where. wherewherewherewhere #i graduated top of my class. i was almost the student speaker.#i have always excelled at work and i work hard #i have been working since i was 13 #WHERE !!!!! IS MY FUCKING !!!! MONEY!!!!!!#ps please do not make the assumption i am ablebodied or neurotypical.#i am neither of these things.#it DOES get worse if u are either of those things. so fuckin much #but @ the one anon who was like ''u could be X that would be worse u don't know how lucky u are''#.... don't i?#do i need to be luckier than someone else #or is it possible we are BOTH victims?#and that we need to work TOGETHER to resolve it #not just wave it off since it COULD be harder for someone else... it can be true we BOTH deserve better

5K notes · View notes

gethimbackpdf · 2 months

Text

i still think that percy should have remembered sally instead of annabeth in son of neptune. don't get me wrong, I like percabeth too and i understand that they had a deep relationship or whatever.

but come on, sally literally put up with gabe for percy, you know the kind of courage that would have required? especially after what she went through previously? she was always the one constant in his life and she should have been acknowledged (grover too should have had a larger role in hoo but that's a whole seperate rant)

look I'm not saying that annabeth isn't important, she is a very big part of percy's life... but sally should have been remembered

#and don't even get me started on that judo flip in moa I could rant about that too #pjo #hoo #son of neptune #sally jackson #percy jackson #annabeth chase #percabeth #grover underwood #scheduled post #rr crit #come on rick you could have done better in EVERYTHING #it's not like the annabeth thing was important to the plot either but sally should have been acknowledged #at least jason remembering thalia makes sense #him remembering annabeth was just a way to remember chb which he could have remembered bc of sally too

429 notes · View notes

luck-of-the-drawings · 2 months

Text

THIS THING IS SCUUUFFED AS HELL & ITS ALSO THE BEST THING I HAVE ANIMATED THUS FAR. IM SO IN LOVE WITH EMIZEL. JUST WISH I GAVE HIM MORE STUPID TATTOOS. NEXT TIME THO. NEXT TIME. I ALSO LOVE VEX&VIV SOOOO MUCH. charlies flavor of Deranged is my FAVORITE!!

#cw gore #jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi suckening #jrwi suckening spoilers #ACTULY FINISHED THIS A WHILE AGO. kept going back n forth between trying to work on it more or call it done #in the end i chose DONE!! i worked on this for a full day n a half. NO idea what possesed me but it is NOT happenin again anytime soon #i shall do better NEXT TIME!! in the meantime tho OH MY GOOOOOD WHO WANTS TO SCREAM ABT THE SUCKENING WITH ME #THE FUCKINNN THE FUCKIN THING WITH VEX N VIV BEING THE SHADOW LEADERS OF THE FANGS/DEMONS #OH MMYY GOOOODDD THATS THEIR LIL MEAT GENERATOR... THTS SO FUCKED UP AND COOL UUUGHHH I LOVE THEM...#THEIR FLAVORE IS SO WONDERFUL. I LOOOVE HOW SILLY THEY ARE. MAKING PUNS WHILE PULLIN A SCREAMING VICTIM APART #vex n his lil fashiony art workshop and viv n her sterile n clean doctors office #i bet she doesnt even HAVE a medical liscense. it would be funny if vex did tho. could u imagine #they main MEDIC in tf2 together. viv is the battlemedic while vex only pocket medics for her. COULD U IMAGINE #guh i could go on abt these two forever n ever n ever i LOVE THEMM i gotta draw em more....#OH ALSO before i run outa room. i should say. i took inspiration from a tf2 animation called POOTIS ENGAGED #the animator. Ceno0. uses black bars in the action sequences in SUCH A COOL WAYYY everytime i watch that video i feel inspired #oneday ill make more complex fight scenes... one day....#in the meantime UGHHH I LOVE THE SUCKENING SO MUUUCH CAN I JUST FUCKIN SAAAYY THAT I THINK EMIZEL IS A SMART COOKIE!!#THESE PPL FUCKING FEAR HIM NOW!!! 'SHAMIA SHAMI' IS NOW THEIR MORTAL ENEMY!! POWERFUL ILLUSIONIST. CANT DIE.#THAT PART AT THE END THERE WHERE HE FUCKIN. KILLS HIMSELF INFRONTA THEM. THATS SO AWESOME. THATS SO METAL. AND THEN HE COMES BACK!!#I WATCHED EP 7 ASWELL BUT I WONT SPOIL IT HERE. BUT OMYGOD. EMIZEL IS SO COOL AND CAPABLE N SMART N FUNNY N UGHHHHHH I LOVE HIMMMMM #OKAY THATS MY RAMBLE FOR THE DAY THANKYOU FOR READING. I READ ALL TAGS SO YOU SHOULD RAMBLE TOO. IF YOU WANT. IF YOU CAN.

547 notes · View notes

azurityarts · 3 months

Text

emera infinity gauntlet

425 notes · View notes

theminecraftbee · 7 months

Text

"You know, I kind of get it now," Gem says to Impulse.

"What?" Impulse says. He's nervously playing with a frozen shard in his hands. Come on, Impulse, head into the dungeon, don't be shy, you can do it. Keep hyping yourself up, you didn't die horribly last time. Ugh, he wishes he were a little less into the game, or maybe more uncomplicatedly addicted, like Gem; it would make everything easier if he thought he could either just leave or play.

"I get it now!" Gem says. "Oh, stop debating if you'll go in like that, either do it or don't."

"I'm trying, Gem!"

"Yeah, but if you aren't gonna do it, I want a go."

"You used all your shards."

"In principle!" Gem says. "It's the principle! You wouldn't get it. You don't hang out here nearly as much as I do. You don't understand, understand the vibes." She sticks out her tongue at him for good measure.

"Well, inform me of the vibes, and maybe I'll work up the nerve," Impulse says.

"It's like--I get it now," she says. "When you were complaining earlier this season about Tango not going outside, I was like, aw man, you redstoners and your caves. I'm a sunshine girl. I like trees. And bloodshed."

"Don't see how those things are related but continue," Impulse says.

"I thought you were complaining because Tango is equally lame as you are about stuff like 'going outside' and 'talking to people who don't drag him into it'," Gem clarifies.

"I go outside!" Impulse says. "I go outside all the time! I ran a rebellion! I pranked you and Pearl! I yelled at Grian! I helped cover the perimeter! I have a whole island and a giant shop! I got a job with Scar! I even went through the Rift! I don't know what you want from me, here. It's not like I'm Tango. I did things that weren't my base from time to time."

"The lady doth protest too much," Gem says.

Impulse sighs. Gem laughs and hops into the air and squeezes herself into a gap between the walls near the entrance to the dungeon. Impulse has seen her in there a lot recently; it's almost like she's a gargoyle, or an inlaid relief for the dungeon. Weird thing to think about his friends, but--

"Besides," Gem continues. "Besides. I just said I get it now."

And something about that makes the hairs on Impulse's arm stand on-end.

"You get why we have to work so hard on circuit design?" Impulse asks hopefully.

"No, I don't get the redstone stuff, that's all still stupid nerd stuff," Gem says cheerfully.

"Jock," Impulse says.

Gem smirks meanly. "Script kiddie."

"Ow, that hurts. And it's not even true. Where did you even learn that one, you just admitted you hate that stuff!"

"Lady never tells her secrets," Gem says.

"Well, if you don't understand the redstone, what do you understand?" Impulse asks.

"Just--you really could stay in here forever, couldn't you? It'd be fun while you did it! I even built a tree and everything. Not much I have to leave for anymore, is there?"

Impulse swallows. Ah.

"Except when you run out of shards," he says, after a painful long several seconds in which there's a rock in his throat and he can't breathe and he has to try very hard to find an excuse to refute that.

"Yeah, except for that. Why did Tango have to go and limit how many times we can go in, huh? If I didn't get bored halfway through the week I think I could just move in!"

And Impulse--

Impulse thinks of Tango.

"Yeah," he says. He plays with the frozen shard in his hands. It feels very cold. "I wonder why."

"So? Are you gonna run or not? I want to mock you when you die," Gem says.

"...I might as well spend them all sooner rather than later," Impulse says, and he puts the shard in the barrel. His heart skips a beat as the door opens. Gem cheers. He shakes his whole body to shake off the conversation as he goes inside. It never does, after all, to try to run the dungeon while distracted.

#hermitcraft #a bee fic #decked out 2 #impulsesv #geminitay #SO GEM BASICALLY LIVES IN DECKED OUT HUH.#staring at the 'tango gets eaten by his base' continuity. that's not concerning at all.#...i have no idea why i thought i was done with this continuity BEFORE decked out opened i should have known better

594 notes · View notes

steddieasitgoes · 1 year

Text

Firefighter Steve sits outside the firehouse late one night, soaking in his first day on the job. Sure, he didn't fight any fires today, but he did get to help with a medical emergency case. So far, it's everything he'd hoped the career choice would be.

He's making a mental list of things to tell his boyfriend, Eddie, about when he sees him tomorrow when a small figure materializes at the end of the driveway. It's a girl. A young one by the size of her shadow, and she's clutching something in her arms.

Not wanting to spook her, Steve slowly rises to his feet but doesn't take any steps toward her. He lets her do that. Watching as the girl takes one cautious step after the other. It's only when she's a few feet away does Steve notice she's clutching a newborn in her small arms.

The girl takes a moment for herself. Brings the baby to her cheek and nuzzles its small face before she starts walking again. This time she doesn't stop until she's right in front of Steve.

"Do you need help?"

She shakes her head before extending her arms and the newborn out toward him.

It takes Steve a moment to realize what's happening, but then his training kicks in. He takes the newborn from the girl's hands without question and takes a moment to glance down at the tiny thing in his arms. When he looks back up, the girl is gone.

The baby stirs in Steve's arm, and he adjusts his hold on them. Brushes a thumb against the baby's soft apples of their cheeks before clutching the infant tight to his chest.

Steve calls the Chief as soon he's back inside the station. The older man is annoyed at first until he glances at the small baby in Steve's arms.

"What do we do?"

The Chief sighs, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Take 'em to the hospital. Get 'em checked out, and then CPS takes over."

Steve knew that. Remembers it from the brief lecture on the importance of safe surrender sights. The same lecture the retired chief preferred by saying “never happens.”

And yet…

Steve glances down at the baby in his arms again and this time he’s met with two tiny brown eyes staring back at him. There’s a moment of calmness before the baby scrunches its small nose and begins to cry. Instinctively, Steve rocks the newborn in his arms and the crying subsides.

“Are we uh,” Steve hesitates, looking down at the baby in his arms. “Are we allowed to intervene before CPS.”

The Chief stops dead in his tracks and slowly turns around to face Steve. “Are you asking if you can keep the kid?”

Steve nods. “My partner and I we uh, we always talked about having kids. And well, uh this feels sort of like fate in a way, sir.”

The Chief nods, “The hospital will know more about this than I will. Let’s get you two over there, yeah?”

-- -- --

It’s three in the morning when Eddie runs into the hospital in his plaid pajama pants and threadbare shirt. He’s seconds away from screaming at the poor woman working reception when he spots Steve around the corner.

“The station called; they said you were on your way to the hospital!” Eddie nearly sobs, taking Steve’s face in his hands. “What happened?”

“M’okay,” Steve says, moving his own hands so that they rest on Eddie’s hips. “They should have worded that call better.” Steve looks over his shoulder, glaring in the direction of the Chief.

“Then why are we here?”

“Come with me.”

Steve leads Eddie down the hallways and straight into the nursery where their baby girl is being swaddled in a new blanket. Eddie gasps, turning to look at Steve with tears welling in his eyes.

“She was surrendered to me an hour ago and I— I don’t know, Eds. I just though, maybe it was fate? Maybe she’s—“

“Meant to be ours?”

“Yeah.”

#this is dumb and not edited #and i could have done a better job but the words arent wording today so be nice #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #steddie ficlet #firefighter steve harrington #Accidental parents? is that a tag it should be #steve harrington x eddie munson #steve harrington ficlet #dani writes

1K notes · View notes

onomatoseeyah · 8 months

Text