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cerisereids · 1 month

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𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞- 𝐞.𝐦. (𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐞’𝐬 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧)

i don’t rly go here at this current moment in time but i def want to start writing for eddie more so im partaking in @carolmunson’s writing challenge!! details found here!

pairing- eddie munson x fem!reader

summary- you’re teaching eddie some baking skills ahead of your family’s holiday party. eddie accidentally lets some insecurities slip. you reassure him how much you love him.

warnings- this lowkey got kind of angsty but only for a little, insecure!eddie but we love him

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

thump.

the collision of soft cushion against the back of your head mats your hair and stops you in your tracks. you pause for a moment, hands settling on the edge of the small trailer’s kitchen. you bite your lip, almost annoyed at yourself that you find his immature behavior so endearing.

“really, eds? are you five?” you chastise lovingly, promptly returning the throw pillow exactly the same way it came.

“oof!” eddie exhales as the pillow comes into contact with his soft tummy, “i'm sooorrryyyyy," he fake whines, sauntering over to your spot in the kitchen, "god forbid i want attention from my girlfriend! didn't realize that was asking so much!"

you roll your eyes at his dramatics but sink into his chest as he encircles his arms around your waist.

"what are we making, pretty girl?" he murmurs against your temple before placing a kiss there.

"my grandmother's famous sugar cookie recipe. you can be in charge of the frosting?" you lean your head back onto his shoulder as you ask the question, your sparkling eyes boring into his uncertain ones.

he sucks in air through his teeth, "i dunno babe, i'm no good at this. in case you forgot, i burn water."

you stiffen in his arms, "don't be like that," you quip, "that's not even true! and you know i hate when you talk about yourself like that. so in case you forgot, you can do anything you set that pretty little mind to." you punctuate your little speech with a kiss to his forehead, hoping it seeps through his brain and he finally understands how amazing he truly is.

"thanks, babe," he mutters sheepishly, his humorous reserve gone, "how do i make frosting? i didn't even know it doesn't always come in cans until just now."

you huff out a laugh, "i brought my recipe book for everything," you explain, pulling out a small notebook full of your grandmother's scribbles, "so as long as you have measuring cups and mixing bowls we should be all set."

he takes a second to rummage through his cupboards, pulling out white plastic cups with faded labels on them- 1 cup, 1/2 cup, 1/4 cup, and so on.

"we don't have any like, nice measuring cups, is this okay?" he asks, voice still meek, cheeks tinted the slightest shade of pink.

“as long as we have the right measurements, i don’t care what they look like,” you flash him your sweetest smile before planting a big kiss on his cheek. you beam when his cheeks flush even deeper.

“soooo…” eddie starts, handing you two mixing bowls and taking one for himself, “who’s all going to be there this weekend?”

you could tell by the unusual nonchalance in his tone that he was nervous, but trying to play it cool. after a lifetime of harassment for being who he was, you knew that the pressure of meeting your family was resting heavy on his shoulders.

“pretty much the whole crew,” you say as lightly as possible, but you still see him tense. “eds. they’re gonna love you. i promise,” you tell him with utmost sincerity.

“really?” he scoffs, putting more elbow grease than necessary into mixing the vanilla cookie frosting, “you positive your picture perfect family is gonna be okay with you bringing some freak to their annual party?” his words have bite to them, and they make you pause. “the fact that your family even has an annual christmas party is beyond me.” he mutters under his breath.

you know what he’s doing, you’ve been here before. eddie sometimes feels insecure about the disparities of his upbringing, and you know by now that he doesn’t mean what he’s saying. his bitter words are his armor, protecting him from the vulnerability he shied away from for years. that doesn’t mean they don’t sting, though.

“eddie, if you don’t stop, we’re gonna have a problem,” you rest your spoon on the lip of the mixing bowl and turn to him, “i love you. everything about you, and my family loves me. which means that they’re going to love you no matter what, because you’re important to me.”

he’s still not entirely convinced, so you opt to pull out the big guns, “eddie. do you love me?”

his eyes snap to yours, wild and incredulous, “of course i do. what kind of question is that?”

“as cheesy as it sounds, that’s all that matters sweetheart. they’re going to see how sweet you love me, and that’s all they’ll need to know you’re amazing,” you thwart his attempts to make himself smaller, “unfortunately for you, babe, you can’t hide from me at this point. i see all of you, i know all of you, and i love all of you,” you move to wrap your arms around his middle, eyes boring into his so he can feel your sincerity.

“you-you really like that?” he chews his bottom lip, “all of me?” the last part comes out quiet, and your heart cracks in your chest.

“i love it, eddie. i love you. i swear i want to go back in time and beat up all those little assholes who made you feel otherwise,” you seal your words with a kiss on his lips, a hint of vanilla frosting dances on your tongue.

“thank you, my love,” he says when you break, squeezing you to his chest in an infamous eddie bear hug, “i love you too.”

the two of you stood there for a minute, your nails scraping at the nape of his neck as he held you close.

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kosmicdream · 2 months

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Please don’t think of me as a male artist.

..is what i used to feel, for many years, even when I finally came out as trans. In a way, its one of the factors that kept me from pursuing HRT (which im so glad i finally did.) After only one year, my feeling on this hasn’t evaporated completely but i suppose I kind of don’t care anymore about how I am interpreted, as a person/artist, ect.. It isn’t something i can be in control of anyway, which upsets me less than it used to.

Sometimes in the past, the way i write characters has often been analyzed by the gender I am, or appear to be - that my male characters were written like how a woman writes men (too emotional/vulnerable, ect) , or how my female characters are written thoughtlessly- like how a man would. (too horny, stupid, violent, ect.) Its not a new way to analyze a story but I can’t say that it doesn’t annoy me. It could still be true that my characters/writing could fall into sexist/problematic archetypes, but gendering my work based on the way my characters act always reminds me of the “you draw like a girl/boy” comments, which used to be more frequent when i was a teen.. But the idea that boys = angular, good at cars! Or something and girls are, i dunno, gonna draw sexy anime men or something. Even as a teenager, i hated this idea that my art was “girl art.” Truthfully, i always viewed my art and myself as an artist as genderfluid, maybe even a type of drag performance, where i can explore any gender and not be limited by my body, it was my escape from that. Which naturally, it became my place to explore gender presentation and eventually helped me “crack my egg” of realizing i was a trans man.

I do think its important to reflect or regard my work as the art made by a trans man, or transmasculine person. I feel more and more just like “just a dude” these days. I am also a gay man. I think those things are important to my work. I think that the analysis of my work in regards to my identity as a person is important to reflect on. I also think the steps I took to get there were important, that transformation and my continued exploration of my older selves and more “label-less” self in the art i make. That’s a private space for me, that I happen to share with the world too. I feel the audience is part of my work too, I welcome it even. I have become part of the audience too and I look at my work as if I’m also a stranger. The older my work gets, the more of it I can study, the more I can see plainly how I got here and also it feels so confusing how it did. I try to study my art to help me find where I want to go to next, a map to guide me.

In some ways, I feel more lost than I did before, where all my instinct was pushing me was just to grow and explore as much as possible. Now, I don’t have that same type of energy that I used to. Its not a bad thing, its just different. There’s a sense of duty and commitment and a sense of dread of the time it takes to do what I feel compelled to do on this step of my journey. I am trying to focus more on the things I used to think I was incapable of before and I’m trying to remember the things I used to think were so effortless. I can tell my art is sharper but it feels almost like a mimicry of my older selves - at least when I revisit old work to continue its journey past where its been frozen in time. Comics take a long time, after all, it's normal that after a few years - a story might be yours, but it feels like it belongs to the past of you too, maybe more than it does in the present. I like the commitment I have to my comics though, its not a burden to me. The feeling is strange anyway.

I tend to think that 1-3 years of a project being made, those are the honeymoon years of the relationship. But you hit a wall in 4-5 years and sometimes you’re in denial about it, you try to keep the dreams and feeling alive as you drag it forward, and sometimes the project really reaches its end around 8-10 years and it becomes a type of empty promise to return to it. Not that this is true for every artist, every project, ect. But I think its a natural lifespan for comics that I’ve observed, and it's because it is uncomfortable to face morality and the morality of our own art. Art is this escape, and when it becomes a job - or an uncomfortable mirror into these things about ourselves, about our failures and promises we couldn’t manage to make, the pressures of the audience, the boredom of the task if you have already told yourself the story a thousand times and you have no longer a desire to continue it, ect - its a normal and natural feeling to want to drop it off a cliff. Blow it up, start over fresh - I know the feeling! Its happened many times. But its kind of temporary? Then, it cycles back to nostalgia - and the desire to create and recreate and reform the past to something tangible again.. uh

Sorry, sorry.. I am getting far from the point I started with. Not that any of this makes too much sense, I feel like writing it anyway. It bothers me that the fantasy of art to me, is the ability to dissolve yourself and stop existing, you are the creator creating. You don’t need to be confined by, really anything. It is in “your control” now, and you surrender your own control by falling into the art and letting it “lead you” places. This is a very seductive process and while it might temporarily be fulfilling (even when done for a lifetime) cannot really.. What.. completely fill the void of whatever you’re chasing down there? Its nice though. At least, when I think about when i first started drawing comics, it was to draw Vash the Stampede (from the original 98 anime series, i hate the new one. We’re not talking about there here) coming out of my television after a thunderstorm and he had to just live in my house now. It was the closest thing I could do to actually manifesting that as reality, of making this amazing anime husband come to life to just like live with me now and be my boyfriend. In a lot of ways I don’t see my pursuit of writing ocs, specifically male ones, really much different from this same desire of like “i can just make my perfect boyfriend!” born out of the loneliness I felt in my heart, and the fear that there is no boyfriend out there for me so i need to frankenstein my own - and this boyfriend will be poifect in every way. Or like, crafting the perfect “relationship” in replace the lack of one, or just the fantasy of watching very abstract extremes come to life in various puppets i crafted, beating the shit out of each other for entertainment. But to subject all these.. Abstract Internal conflicts as simply like a “boy author thing” or “girl author thing” is like.. Tiring. Are we really not past that? (Of course not.)

Like there’s some hidden truth to the way someone might write/draw, the way that “makes sense” in retrospect once the identity of the author is analyzed and discovered.. How can you make sense of the self, let alone the other .. and In a way that’s permanent? And gendered? Does art now have an inherent sex characteristic? But I cannot deny that I do want my art to look and feel like part of who I am, what I have chosen to sexually identify as - a transgender, a man, a faggot. I DO identify as a sexual deviant, but that is hilarious because I have been single for so long at this point I can’t even remember in a tangible way what that felt like and I question if I ever felt it or experienced it “for realsies” because of the experiences I have had or havent didn’t feel very fulfilling or romantic, despite that being something I desire so much - and so I feel like a failure. And to create art just based on the fantasy of desire rather than the lived reality, can it even really display what that would actually be like. So its embarrassing, right?

I have worked on my art a lot and I have often thought, or come to the conclusion (true or not) that my singleness is the result of my pursuit and dedication to art - which is the pursuit of self isolation and protection from harm. From influence, from acknowledging that life can exist and someday end. And when you work on projects for years and years, the pride/shame dichotomy only gets more.. Weird. It gets weird, guys! It always was weird, but.. I just think about so many my heroes, my art inspirations, working decades on their art.. I follow in their footsteps too and it feels scarier and lonelier than I expected it to be. And the more and more I realized that as a reality, as my 20s faded away, the more I kept walking. I wasn’t gonna stop now, even if I could, I don’t want to and its not hard to do other things too. I have a slower pace than I used to (thank god) and gets slower but I’m still moving.

I don’t post or write my little art journals as much as I used to. Mostly cause I don’t really have anything good to say and it kinda feels embarrassing to post them too LOL. But.. whatever!! Its been a weird four months of me being off work and I’m about to go back to being a normal working person again.. But its like, its weird to tell people about your art when they ask about what you do. Its like “oh yeah, i draw webcomics” and they wont get it, you’ll say - “yeah its 8,000 pages long” and they’ll say, “thats a lot!” and it is. They’re very nice about it, but there’s a lack of satisfaction there with what that means. I don’t expect it, that’d be dumb as hell. Its nice to take a break from it too, to discover other sides of myself I never let shine because i stayed indoors for a decade, but its a weird feeling too. Like, what will it mean in the end? I don’t really know.

I don’t think I need “success” to feel like this was worth it, its not like a trophy is gonna come in the mail for the good workTM I’ve done - there is no closure to the work I make even when a story finishes. I have to keep going regardless of that, and its strange to know it won’t ever feel done. But I am so thirsty for that temporary itch to be scratched, it keeps me working every day for the “maybe” of what that might feel like. Kinda silly, really. Is it my “male” pride that demands recognition? Would respect be given more freely if I had “remained” to be perceived as a woman, for subverting the expectations for what a woman can/can’t write? (lol) Is my value as a person determined by that sort of thing in my art? I don’t think of my pride as gendered, but I know its there and I know because of who I say I am, my pride will be gendered by others. I think when I was a woman, that pissed me off more than now because.. Well.. I wasn’t even living as the way i wanted to. I still don’t really live as the way I want to, the way I want to be perceived, but even being on HRT for a little more than 1 year, without much else lifestyle changes, I feel a little more at peace not mattering what others will take away from me or what i write about. I have a lot of my own expectations for myself and what i write about and that concerns me far more.

I don’t really know how else to end this, I’m going to eat chocolate now. Oh, to answer your question (?) if you might have this one: can I think of you as a male artist, kosmic? sure. I am one after all.

#whoops! long post #its very rambly sorry #webcomics

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kasaslovr · 1 year

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ੈ✩‧₊˚ 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which no girl has even looked his way so what makes him think you will. he's just not getting the hint that you want him to have little taste of your love

❈ warning: f!reader, college au, mutual & m!masterbation, fingering, praise, pet names, hair pulling?, teasing, he's like kinda subby at first then dom teehee, porn with plot. wc: 3.5k

❈ notes: i changed the concept oops, idk maybe ill write a fratboy!gojo fic later, idk my friend was talking about how they dislike a playboy gojo so shoulder shrug. likes and reblogs r much appreciated mwahh anyway please enjoy my official first piece !

its not like he was hated, not at all. its just he never stood out and was never labeled anything more than basic. he just wanted to get through his college life peacefully. he didn't need those parties that lasted till 2am or those saturday night hookups which would leave him heart broken. sure he's had friends talk to him here and there, but he would never get super personal with anyone, ever.

it was a study hall in a library where there should’ve been just silent but instead, there would be students gossiping or making out in such a public place. how vulgar. he wasn't a nerd either, just an average guy honestly. he was finishing up notes that he could use for his next unit test, until the aroma of warm vanilla and marshmallows filled his nose, he usually wouldn't look, but he couldn't help it since it was right next to him. you were right next to him.

he slowly turned towards you and was met with such a winning smile with your head tilted and hand under your chin. your eyes were staring right at him like you were trying to see through his own eyes. you had the cutest cheeks he's ever planted his eyes on, they were just a little rosy and rose just a bit when you smiled at him. and your lips, they were beautifully plump with a little shine from your gloss and it was moving–shit you were talking and soon he was convinced. he's never had a taste of love like this before or ever.

“hello? i asked if we had biology together?” there was a concern look on your face, he snapped out of his thoughts and looked anywhere else besides your face. “uh i’m not to sure..” he responds with his hand reaching to the back of his neck, god you must think he's such a big loser cause of course he wouldn't know, all he does is keep his eyes down at his paper or at the floor.

a sign of nervousness. how cute you thought. you knew satoru was in your class, of course you did, ever since you transferred all you wanted was a new start and to live out your life so you did that, went to any party possible and made as many friends as you could while sticking with old ones. but there's one thing you wouldn't do and that was to let just any guy to have a taste of your love, you were gonna be in the one to control who you want to love and such and you chose him. gojo satoru.

“gojo right? i’ve definitely seen you around, you feed those cute cats behind the building!” you exclaimed, way louder than he would've liked and loud enough to make his ears red. “uhm yeah..look are you following me around for fun or something because there are more entertaining things to do.” he suddenly felt discouraged like he wants to cry or never find someone attractive again.

“no no no, of course not! that was just by coincidence and since then i kinda told myself ‘i have to get to know such a cute and sweet guy.’” you said smiling ever so sweetly. what did you just say? cute? sweet? he's never seen himself in such way nor has anybody else, maybe when he helps the old ladies open the door or when his friends sees adorable baby photos of him, but he's never felt these kinds of butterflies about it before.

“you-you think im cute?” he turned towards you again to see if there was any sign of jokingly behavior, but no, you were being genuine. “yeah i do. i’m y/n, i think i need to be caught up on stuff in biology and you seem pretty smart so maybe if you wanna stop by my dorm sometime and help out i would totally appreciate it, im in room 318 in wing c.” you informed, you were starting to feel a little nervous now cause what if he thought you were just messing with him or gave him stalker vibes, you didn't want that at all.

yes. a million times yes. he thought, he got so excited that he all of sudden stood up, giving you quite a shock, but made you giggle a little and he found his favorite sound ever. “yes i will..i mean i will take you up on that offer. is there a certain time or day you'd like me to go over?” he asked, he didn't think you guys were gonna be at that point where he could just go into your room anytime soon. “hmm doesn't matter to me, i’m never really busy.” you shrugged and now he's thinking of showing up tomorrow morning, but soon he’s interrupted by an alarm on your phone.

“shit! i’ve got lessons, here,” you grabbed a pen off of his notebook and wrote your number in the corner with a little heart. “now you should contact me whenever. i’ll see you around.” you smiled and wave then left the library while adjusting your tote bag on your shoulder. gojo put your number in his phone as soon as he could, in case he forgot of course, but how could he? you've made his day maybe his whole week–hell his entire month. he gathered up his stuff and walked to his dorm quickly.

he searched for his keys in this bag which were usually hung on his tiny key chain that geto gave him, he likes to deny him and gets undying friendship, in reality he was his best friend and almost brother, but gojo denies it all. he opens the door and expects to see geto laying on the couch with a bag of chips on the couch and a Red Bull on the little coffee table, but no there was a small post, which geto stole from satorus room of course, it on the fridge saying ‘heyy im out to go bang a super hot chick from wing b, she's so hot and let me tell you when her boobs were bigger than my hands, i had to get in on that lmaoooo see ya tmrw - super hot playboy sugaru’ gojo had to blink of couple times until he reacted to it, he gagged with disgust and rolled his eyes, ripped off the note and threw it in the trash.

geto was almost the opposite of gojo, get had plenty of people follow him, guys he played sports with and some who just thought he was cool and wanted to tag along, there were girls too and they had the smallest articles of clothing and would throw themselves onto geto, it was almost like geto was some kind of cult leader. gojo chuckled at the thought, no way. what makes geto different is that he was kind and acknowledged everyone around him.

gojo opened the door, turned on the lights and set his glasses on the table, grabbed some clothes that looked comfy and made his way to the bathroom to take a shower early since he ended sweating lots more than he usually would. after a half hot half cold shower since college bathing is shit he decided he would order some KFC knowing geto wouldn't be here to steal everything in the bag. gojo knew it was gonna take a while so he went into his room, closed door and lights off. some him time after a long day of classes.

soon satoru got curious, he was thinking back on gets note, did you know him?hes quite popular so maybe, but you were new so he was conflicted. gojo opened his instagram that he barely uses and only got it cause geto forced him to, but he logged onto his account with only 14 followers and got to searching, he went to gets that he has around 10 times more followers than gojo, but he doesn't mind since he doesn't even post anything. he went to search for your name in getos follower list and there you were, gojo felt his heart leap out of his chest of what? he doesn't know just yet. he's excited he found your account even if its a bit stalkerish, but you followed geto so were you using him to get with his roommate. he hopes not, he prays not.

with trembling fingers he pressed your account, he examined your account. your profile picture was a cute mirror picture with a white sweater on and studying something and you used a table mirror to take the picture, it was so cute, he moved onto to your recent post and he felt his heart drop even farther down and his eyes slightly widen. its you, of course, in a tiny blue swimsuit a two piece to be specific.

there's three different photos, one of them is you closing your eyes with your knees bent onto the sand and hands cupping your own face and squishing your breast together, it must be unintentional, it has to be because gojo wouldn't know what to do with himself if it was on purpose almost like you knew he was gonna see this and get the hardest boner he's ever received in his life, he swiped to the left, not to exit but to look at the next picture. you're by the shore now and it looks like you're walking with a hand out and another holding your hat to cover your face and finally the last one. youre in the water just above thigh length and you're facing the sunset and your ass is on full display.

gojo couldn't do it anymore, either he was to go throw his phone away and take another cold shower or die because you were just so breathtaking, he scrolled to the first one and he didn't mean to look at your breast, but he didn't and then getos note came into mind again, damn geto, could his hands fit over your boobs? he had to do something about his problem. with his phone in one hand and his other snaking down to pull down his sweatpants, his dick was already leaked with precut ever since he found your account.

he used his thumb to spread the precut around tip to down to the base then back up. his mind was racing and imagining how would you play with his cock. would you make him beg for it? edge him over and over again until there's tears pooling in his eyes? or maybe you would make his sit on his knees like how are in that first pic and make him eat you out without any hands as you play with his cock and just use him as you please. all these fantasies has made his hand speed up and his groans louder now becoming words as he gets lost into wanting you so badly. “f-fuck..wanna cum inside you, baby.” he threw his head back and soon dropped his phone not even caring if it broke. his other hand ran through his hair then moved it down to his chest where he played with his nipples over his shirt, he's never masterbaited like this before, never with this much emotion.

he was so close, pants and boxers by his ankles and the ends of his shirt caught in between his teeth. he wasn't taking it slow anymore, he just wanted to cum and the shlick slapping noises have just gotten wetter and almost heavier. he was pinching and pulling on his nipples now, they're both red and swollen, but it only adds to his pleasure. his face was red with blush and sweat built up on his forehead while moaning and whimpering your name over and over again like a prayer. would you moan his name like this? imagine you getting lost into so much pleasure where your toes are curled and eyes are crossed and screaming his name with moans followed right after, oh to make you feel that good. it got him painting his hand white and your name on his tongue. he felt his breath staggering back to normal as he cleaned up and when he completely snapped back into reality he wondered how was he supposed to face you.

its been 2 weeks, 5 days, 6 hours, and 27 minutes since gojo spoke to you. of course you've tried to say something to him, but he gets all flustered and leave or ignore you if he must. its really throwing you off so you text him. “hey gojo! could u come over and help me over this unit, but if ur busy that's ok, i don't wanna bother u. just lmk! <3” and sent, you hope your words can convince him to stop whatever phase he is in to talk to you.

gojo is sitting on his bed with his glasses off and hands on his face. what was he supposed to do? you sounded so distressed and he wants to help you, he truly does, but how can he face you when he's done something so lewd. ok fuck it, he has a plan he’ll result to pointing and yes and nos that's easy enough. he grabbed his textbooks and shoved them in his bag and rushed out the door and storming over to your room.

around 20 minutes later he's appeared in front of your door with three quick and panicked knocks. when you open the door you can see his face flushed with red from speed walking his way here and his breath is heavy. you say something first “i didn't know you were coming, i would've changed.” you joked, maybe lighting the mood would make him feel better, but all he did was scan you from your brown slippers to your biker shorts and at your black bra and he gulped “would you like to come in?” you asked him and he nodded.

this was getting quite annoying. you didn't really need to study since you were pretty smart anyway, but your love for gojo hasn't left at all, you still find him the sweetest guy ever and really adorable and you thought inviting him over would settle things, but the tension only grew. until you stood up and asserted your dominance.

“okay satoru, i don't know what's been going on with you or why you won't talk to me at all, but if i did something im sorry and if i didn't then what the fuck! i feel like im putting all this effort to be with you and you all of sudden don't give a shit about me!” you shouted almost on the verge of tears. it wasn't your first round of rejection, but to be ignored and humiliated like this was a first and you hated it and felt strong urges to just punch his face if he continued to portray this silent treatment.

“i..i uh” he stutters, god you can feel tears dripping down your face. “do you hate me or something?!” you asked, not even caring if the neighbors next door are listening in. “no! i don't, its just..i really like you and i don't want be a loser in front of you and i was stalked your instagram and ended up jerking off to one of your photos and im sorry!” he confessed with a panicked expression. why did he admit that? his confession was also lame as fuck? was he in middle school? gojo felt so light headed suddenly and closed his eyes shut and braced himself for a punch anywhere on his body and he held his face.

he's never felt such way for someone before and this time it was his fault that they were gonna walk away. he hates himself so much right now and wishes he wasn't some weird loser kid and wishes he was someone more popular, more social, more like geto.

when he peered through his fingers he saw your face and you were..laughing? why? he just told you the most shameful things he's done in his life and you laugh. “sorry sorry, you know because its you i don't mind.” you blush a little while wiping your tears. “and i like you too if you couldn't tell..” you mumbled, finally gaining eye contact with him. he's looking down and playing with his fingers, he's confessed to girls before, but for someone else to want him first. it makes his self confidence sky rocket honestly.

“im still sorry for what i did, but can i ask you for something?” he asked, you nodded slowly, truly having no idea on what it is, “can i kiss you?” he asked shyly and you didn't even responded, you couldn't tell what was moving faster, your mind racing a million times per hour or feet rushing to put your lips on his. it was nowhere close to shy or calm. it was kiss full of madness, want, lust, and love. with noses colliding teeth clashing with one another, and tongues only making the kiss less collective and messy.

you grabbed his hand and led him into your bedroom without breaking off the kiss, you locked the doors and turned off the lights only leaving your little yellow lamp on your table as a light source. “off. i wanna see you.” he said his voice hoarse from being breathless while trying to rush you, you worked as quick as you could only for satoru to help you as you shoved your pants off he got your top and latched his mouth onto one of perky nips and playing with the other, he closed his eyes and moaned loudly without any shame which caused vibrations through your body adding to the pleasure. “satoru, baby lemme make you feel good too, please.” you moaned softly while trying to get his pants off, anything to return this favor of lust, he pulled off for a split second just to take his shirt off and as soon as that was off he continued ti mark your body with big red splotches that will soon turn people in due time and all over your neck and finally his pants came out and before you could make a move on him, he grabbed your hands

“show me. right now how you play with yourself. put a show on come on.” he encouraged, letting your hands go then peeling off his boxers, slowly moving his wrists up and down his leaking dick. while watching him it felt like your mind was on autopilot, you slipped off your panties and gathered some wetness that has been developed from the kissing and such. you didn't care that you making a mess everywhere, spreading your juices all over your already drenched until you stick a finger in, moaning so light almost with a relief cause the sensation was just so good. then another one, but it wasn't enough your fingers couldn't reach into the deep spots your toys usually could, but why do you need it when you have one right in front of you. with his mouth agape and his abdomen flexing and a flush covering his entire body, to the tip of his cock to the blades of his shoulder. “t-toru s’not enough. want your dick now.” you whined, wording slurring as your brain turned into mush.

his eyes traveled down to your messy cunt and there was a faint smirk on his face. “oh needy little thing, you want me to help you out, sweetheart. you gotta open those cute legs of yours further then.” he said letting go of his crimsoned tip cock and taking the fingers that were in your pussy to spread them farther and when he saw the sight, he felt the wind knocked out of his chest. all he could do was stare. “stop looking, ‘s embarrassing” you mumbled looking away, honestly the fire in the bottom of your stomach only grew as he continued to play with your pretty little pussy.

he moved your fingers away as he plunged his own right in without an ounce of hesitation. he wasn't being gentle at in nor nice. he wasn't your toy, you were his and he loved it like that. “ill look if i wanna, ‘s mine now isn't it? tell me, pretty girl, who's your cute lil pussy gushing all over for?” he was merciless and he didn't hold back, not at all. “you! satoru! its yours, ‘m all yours, please wanna cum!” you were so close, moans only got louder and higher in octaves at that point, “’s lucky you're so cute, cum for me, baby.” he says leaning in to kiss you and your swollen lips from deep heavy kisses and from biting on it to keep quiet, though it didn't work in the slightest. he moved his head down back to your neck, he loves this taste of you and he’ll never ever get enough.

with your hands in his hair and a slight tug, you came and it completely drenched the sheets and almost the entirely of his hand, as your brain became cleared of fog and passion you rested your weight on satoru only for him to push you down and get on top of you and the feel of his tip kissing your clit, teasing your already worn out cunt.

“you thought we we’re done? nah baby ive gotta taste more of your love.”

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bcyhoods · 11 months

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BLUSHING🫀 ─── send in a character au and a scenario for a drabble or headcanons !

omg okay I need ur thoughts on fake dating with rockstar!eddie. this is a threat (I’m kidding. mostly)

BYE I NEED. musician!reader annnnnd mean eddie. (well as mean as i was able to convey, it’s barely there im sorry LOLZ)

super cool 100 celebration

fake dating with rockstar!eddie

it is absolutely, entirely a pr stunt at first.

mr. munson’s reputation is a little worse for wear at the moment. his devilish good looks can only get him out of so much trouble

and you’re an up-and-coming artist with a new single that you want to release so badly buuuuuuuuuuut

marketing! you need more outreach, more publicity, so that it can actually sell and so your label doesn’t lose money

and hey, what do ya know? you and eddie are signed to the same label! hey, they have an awesome idea

eddie is dismissive at first. he can’t make eye contact with you for more than two seconds at a time and when you’re alone he looks so grumpy

the first outing is at a diner and you’re trying to ask him questions because you’re gonna be stuck spending time together for who knows how long (and he’s also very attractive. sue you for wanting to get to know him)

“so how’d you get into music :)))”

and he kinda frowns. it’s more like a wince than anything else, like he has a splinter. and he’s like “does it matter? the faster we eat, the faster we can leave.”

and boy, does that set the mood for the rest of the evening. you’re sitting there eating a meal with someone who gives off the impression that they hate you

but as you’re walking out, he’s quick to grab onto your hand and lead the way out. and you’re like ??? until you notice the mob that stands outside

it’s so overwhelming. there’s a sea of paparazzi that you have to fight through, everyone is yelling, the camera flashes are blinding, and eddie is walking way too fast for comfort that your fingers are starting to slip from his grip

he’s glancing back at you and he notices all the lenses being shoved in your face and the really creepy whistles

so he starts shoving, elbowing, shouting expletives — which is really counterintuitive considering the terms of your relationship — in order to wrap an arm around your shoulders and guide you to the car

“are you okay? did any of em touch you? >:(”

and it gives you whiplash because this man was ignoring your existence like 10 minutes ago

i mean you don’t know that it’s because he’s disappointed. first date with somebody that is way out of his league and it’s a damn pr stunt. and you’re kind, and you make good music, but there’s no way you’re actually interested

so he keeps you at arms length because he doesn’t want to get his feelings hurt. after that day, he eases up a little though

he knows more about the industry than you do, so he’s giving you pointers, spilling little secrets

he suggests that they include a sound bite of your voice on the band’s next single and the label is eating it up

whenever you go to parties or events together and you’re wearing something that hugs your figure or shows skin, he is drooling. he cannot focus on anything anybody is saying

it’s really not hard to pretend to be in love with you cough because he’s not pretending cough

he is always touching you. even when you’re alone, his hands are holding yours, his arm is around your shoulders, his thigh is pressing against yours

obviously, he makes a show of it in front of the cameras, pulling you in so close that you’d think someone super glued your sides together. a big smack of his lips against your forehead (forehead kisses are so hard to dismiss because they’re so affectionate)

but when you’re alone, he becomes really gentle? and you didn’t think eddie munson was capable of soft touches but it’s sooooooooo

his hand rests on your lower back whenever you enter a room, it’s very light and timid though, like he doesn’t want to push any boundary. he holds your elbow too

you both think of a really sick “photo bait” that the paps can take pictures of like feeding each other grapes or pouting at each other and you guys laugh and cringe at it

on the inside though you’re both like “wait a minute why do i like this rn”

then the label catches on and they suggest that you guys need to kiss on camera when your single releases

and you’re so nervous because you guys have shared cheek and forehead kisses before, but the lips are a whole new territory

so at the release party, right at midnight, he’s beaming down at you with a smile that looks so real and genuine and his eyes are glowing

but when you lean up to kiss him, he stops you. his hands are holding your jaw and he leans over to whisper in your ear

“i want our first kiss to be in private, because we both want it. not because someone’s taking a picture.”

and your brain goes to mush like ?!?!????!!

and you discover pretty quickly that he really is a damn good kisser

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pastadoughie · 4 months

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Read over what was going on with anon asks and your posts, and tbh, if you are 16 and you are reaching this kind of critical thinking and actively trying to better yourself through meaningful debates and convos, you are doing god's fucking work from early. I couldn't even begin to form the kind of arguments you are articulating at your age in your posts, so fucking kudos.

I have a similar opinion of sexism being bad no matter the form it takes, patriarchy affects everyone because it imposes roles on everyone, not only women. Breaking those roles on all sides and genders should be the ultimate goal, not try to benefit from the system to become the oppressor.

In any case dude, good luck with the unavoidable influx of people who will misinterpret your posts. Also, your art is hella cool!

i think that alot of ppl just have a rlly hard time like, getting over the gut response to defend themselves when they recieve some kind of serious critisism, like, i think ppl understand on some level that sexism as a concept is stupid, but it can be hard to fully see all the nuances it takes and like, actually recognize it when its subtler

sexism is bad and when i point out that alot of you guys believe ideas that are like, really sexist then thats like, im assuming none of you are like "YEAA SEXISM RUELZZZ!!!! I HATE PEOPLE BASED ON THIER GENDOR" and u rlly rlly dont wanna be lumped into that group

its rlly normal to not wanna be mischaracterized and if you dont self identify as sexist then when someone points out sexist retoric it feels like an unfair and reductive veiw of u

and its like, you really really really need to work past that, im talking abt this stuff because i want ppl to change and be better and if you want that for yourself u have to like rlly chew on these kinds of things

i think what alot of people have issues with is like, relatability in artwork, like "of course im gonna like art with queer women in it more and find it more valueble if im a queer woman" but i think that this points to a really rigid and uphelpful veiw of gender

ive discussed before that, because the mind numbing ammount of biological differences people have theres no actual objective definition of sex or gender, its socially constructed and entirely arbitrary and subjective

i think that labels for sexuality and gender are useful shorthand in our current society though ideally we wouldnt need them, but you need to remember that these things arent rigid

butch lesbian is not a definable group, gay man is not a definable group, they are arbitrary words that mean something different for literally every different person

likewise acting like those meaningless labels somehow make some artwork more or less valueble just points to a bias against people with a certain label

like, the labels dont mean anything they shouldnt change your veiw of a work, if you resonate with a peice of work why does it matter what label is put on it? why does that affect your veiw on the peice?

and yes you are objectively going to relate to some experiences more then others, but i dont think relatability should effect how you value the work, infact id argue seeing perspectives different then your own is incredibly incredibly valueble and, if your disregarding (even subconciously) certain things because theyre made by men then that not only hurts men but it hurts you, it isolates you

maybe i didnt word that perfectly im not always the most articulate but like, i think most of the issues people are having with this are coming from me articulating things maybe not as intuatively as i could or from people refusing to properly engadge with what i have to say

idk, regarding the people accusing me of transmysogeny i just wanna say that like, I AM NOT ALLERGIC TO TALKING TO YOU ABT THIS!! i want to be better and i dont want to be mysogenistic! and if you do see concerning behavior in me i want to be told of it, you keeping these kinds of things to yourself or refusing to engadge with me when i actively am trying to be like, thourough and nuanced about things is just kinda, not productive

#the beast speaks #ask #asks #the-fifteen #retchid opinions

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dnphobe · 3 months

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Looking at how they've presented themselves over time is always interesting. I think the queer experience of slowly questioning societal and gender norms (and gender, in many cases) is something I recognize in them. Im also curious how Phil's journey is different because he was out to his close ones for a lot longer, and it feels like Dan has more fun shouting about being gay because of the trauma that he associated with the label. I loved seeing their support of queer identities even when they were publicly closeted. It's nice that, even if they weren't comfortable being out, they wanted everyone to know they were a safe space

i agree! the different ways they've presented themselves to us over the years is one of my favourite topics to talk about tbh!

dan's journey wrt to gender presentation and how he feels about gender (not gonna theorise on how he identifies bc what do i know, but to quote him he's fine with being viewed as a man but also not offended if people use pronouns/gendered terms outside of that to refer to him) is interesting because he's said he's always been "flamboyant" but tried to hide that in his youtube career for a long time, and he's gone from saying "i can't do it i'm just such a boy" about painting his nails to having them painted more often than not, but also in day in the life of manchester he said he sometimes wishes he was a girl when looking at 'women's clothing', so it's clearly something he's felt for a long time.

i don't think phil necessarily feels the same pull to be gender non-conforming, but it is also something he's struggled with doing (in one of the stereo shows, when talking about the maid dress he wore in VPMO 2, he said that while it was a cheap joke outfit, a few years ago he would not have felt comfortable wearing a dress at all) so that might be something he's still working toward being comfortable with, but at the same time he's never felt shame about telling us things like he likes using raspberry scented body wash or that he does skin care (while when phil mentioned doing skin care dan was clutched by toxic masculinity saying "don't do- i mean that's fine!"

agree with dan having more fun shouting about being gay because of the trauma and i'm so glad he's reached where he is now! phil...i think for a long time he thought he didn't NEED to shout about being gay, especially because like you said he was out to a few people for longer. but i think it's something he realised he DID want to do after coming out to us. as he said in his coming out one year later video he didn't realise how much of himself he was holding back from us by not being out and it feels like a weight off his shoulders now. i think they both love being gay and shouting about being gay and celebrating that with us and im so proud of phil too <3 i actually have a hot take which is i think if it wasn't for dan's coming out he might have never fully come out to us, not just in a "if dan never had he never would have" way, but in a "if he and dan never met he wouldn't have" way, because he IS a private person and didn't think he was missing out on anything.

i am always so glad they made sure we knew they were accepting of us even if they weren't ready to be out. ngl it got kind of rough in like 2012 for me when dan was so adamantly against people thinking he was gay my own internalised homophobia brain went "does he hate gay people?" but that's on me, not him, or more accurately on BOTH of our internalised homophobia situations lmao. but yeah they've always been so sweet about their queer and trans fans, and one thing i personally appreciate so much is how they will use they/them for any fan they don't know the gender of no matter what their name/appearance/voice would make other people assume their gender to be! i feel so safe with them, and im gonna add this bc im still sappy after this weekend, so safe with phannies too <3 i think phannies queer identities and dnp's queer identities have ALWAYS flowed into each other and both sides of the parasocial line have made the other side feel safe and grow into their identities and helped them accept and appreciate other people's identities.

#asks

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bulkhummus · 1 year

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okay my main silly points are these:

1. Lubelle vagued carlos on public radio <3

2. i just know cecil is a horrible driver “yeaaah now we’re really cookin” hes so cute .. YES YELL .. the whole town looking around at one another like is he okay

3. Cecils quiet “its true” about the exotic birds at a jewish service? i hate him

My main serious points are these:

1. THE MURALS (its like they knew i was reading transcripts just moments before….. ) very interested that they disappeared Jerrod. I do love the symbolism of trying to paint over something that is akin to a bleeding heart. Unable to cover up what makes up a living breathing town. Exposing a towns underbelly etc etc. the town is alive

2. ‘The words are still there but theres no power behind them’ — implications for one special radio host, i must say.

3. Absolutely entranced by the wording “the science of carlos” instead of saying ‘carlos’ science’ as if carlos himself, his way of being, his structure, is what is being emphasized. and its being labeled as good, kind, healing, love, humanity. That is who he is. Vs Lubelle, who is cold, dissected, conquering etc. it was just some fun wording

4. The idea of using good tools to do bad things is something i’ve talked about before in relation to lubelle, plus has been a debate in history throughout the century in regards to science. my mind keeps going back to the fact that carlos used to work with her, or in close proximity to her— and he called her frightening in her determination and drive. i love to speculate on why carlos left for night vale, how he heard of it, but now im wondering why lubelle is there (i mean aside from her mission). I keep thinking abt how she wants to explain everything away until there is not an ounce of poetry left — how do you keep wonder alive when all you do is search for explanation? When your occupation means whats discovered is then known? What was it about night vale that drew carlos in? Was there nothing left for lubelle where she was? Had she overturned every last stone where she was? A person who knows what theyre doing can still be lost. Its funny to see the similarities in her character in comparison to carlos— mainly because he could have been like her. Even his town meeting where he states “ive come to see just what is going on around here” is a lot softer version of lubelles plan. How much difference intention can make. I am reminded of what Cecil said shortly after, in episode 1, which is “I fear for Night Vale. I fear for anyone caught in between what they know and what they don’t yet know what they know.” <- gonna make a separate post about this

5. “We may never fully understand, or understand at all what it was and why it dumped a lot of dead animals on our community. But, and I’m going to get a little personal here, thats the essence of life, isn’t it? Sometimes you go through things that seem huge at the time, like a mysterious glowing cloud….. while they’re happening they feel like the only thing that matters, and you can hardly imagine that there’s a world out there that might have anything else going on. And then the glow cloud moves on. And you move on. And the event is behind you. And you may find that, as time passes, you remember it less and less. Or absolutely not at all, in my case. And you are left with nothing but a powerful wonder at the fleeting nature of even the most important things in life…” — episode 2, Glow Cloud. I’m very sad. It’s not about fully understanding something, sometimes.

#this is a mess but i wanted to get some of it out of my brain so i can sleep #p good episode #will check in tmrw to see what people are sayin #wtnv #wtnv spoilers #welcome to night vale #im so tired

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safety-pin-punk · 6 months

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I have a bunch of clothes that used to belong to my brother. They're all hand me downs (fantastic news) but they have a bunch of branding and logos and stuff (less fantastic). Some of it is easier to cover up with smaller logos, but others have really big logos on them or have other identifying features (like the three stripes along the legs of adidas sweatpants) and im not sure how to cover it effectively. I just worry that somebody is going to think I'm a poser for wearing it even though none of it was my choice and I haven't given a single penny to those companies because none of the clothes are new. Any advice?

I have gotten so many asks recently from people worried about being labeled a poser. And I think I'm going to make a big separate post one day just talking about this mindset and what to do about it. But the long story short is that you simply need not care what others think.

But to your question anon, if you do want to cover it effectively or even just make them blend with punk aesthetics, my advice would be to diy them. Cover with patches, add embroidery, use them for fabric for a completely different project. Instead of hiding obvious branding, try to find ways to show it off but with an obvious note of hating the companies. Like adding a BUNCH of anti nazi shit to adidas clothing. Instead of trying to hide it, make it a statement piece that will spark conversations about the history/problems with company xyz.

But also. Dont feel like you have to. YOU know that you are adhering to punk values simply by wearing hand me downs. Not gonna lie, I wear all kinds of hand me down/thrifted shit that is not inherently punk. One of my favorite combos is my 'land of the free home of the brave' shirt with literally anything that is anti-gov. It confuses people. It sparks conversations. Its thrifted. Its anti fast fashion. Its about not giving a shit what someone is going to say and doing it anyway. Because you know its good. If someone is gonna give you trouble for it, then they dont seem like the type of person you should waste your energy worrying about anyways.

#anon Im sorry this post got kinda overrun with the whole 'stop caring about being a poser' thing. Just had to get that out before I forgot #mail tag

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fellcharas · 2 years

Text

on a more serious note, i kind of hate how certain people in the fandom have ruined or skewed the general perception of errink for a lot of people

it's fine if you don't like it regardless of the reason, im not saying you have to like it. im talking about the people who were exposed to it when it was portrayed as a really toxic or abusive ship, or when it was extremely oversexualized. even now seeing people label one or the other as a top or bottom for completely asinine things just makes me shudder

and i think it's just that it's really popular too... which is fine if that's a reason why some people don't like errink. but to me, their dynamic just fascinates me in general. two immortal beings trying to find a justification for their existence — one creates, the other destroys — they have more in common than one would expect. both share the fear of being abandoned or otherwise forgotten, which is a huge drive for why they do what they do, even if they won't admit it

and the fact that error is perceived as this constantly angry, grumpy person just because he destroys universes — he's bitter, yes, he's very much hurting. but in the og comic/ask blog his emotions were wildly inconsistent. ink is similar to this; he lacks empathy due to also lacking a soul, and therefore even if he takes a stable mix of his paints, his emotions can still appear inconsistent. but people portray his lack of empathy as a bad thing as well, making it seem like he's dangerous or untrustworthy. which... ok, not gonna get into how that can be ableist, but for the sake of the topic, ink can absolutely have compassion for others. he just may not be very good at it because he doesn't have empathy to help.

i find that they are far more similar than different, and that's what makes their differences all the more fascinating to me. i don't see how they wouldn't get along; as friends, partners, whatever! if the circumstances were right, anyway. if they put aside their opposing goals to justify their individual existences, maybe, just MAYBE they would get along far better than we expect.

tldr i dont like the general perception of errink and i want them to come together and heal from their traumas and teach each other different ways to look at the multiverse while respecting their separate views

#inkling.txt

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shiveringgroovy · 25 days

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PART 3 HC ASKS

WHAT KIND OF COMPUTER DOES EVERYONE USE ipads/tablets are allowed im extending this to like phones and stuff i've just decided

errrm HEHEHE !! gonna do my favs for this :3

Sheogorath

not a big computer guy. probably has a fuckass nokia phone and has hit computers with golf clubs before.

haskill gives him a tablet to watch shitty youtube videos on

i know he fucks with really bad yt shorts

probably invented them tbh

Atsushi

has a phone and that's about it

uses agency computers for work and kinda hates operating them (they also kinda suck so yk)

Sotha Sil

INSANELY FAST RUNNING SETUP

like 500 monitors and LEDs and a see-through tower and a fucking gaming chair

blender king

probably built it all himself

he's insane

the electric bill is through the roof.

Fyodor (i actually despise him but it's funny)

so he canonically has the worst most diabolical evil fucked up setup known to MAN please get him to touch some grass i'm begging you

freaky ass medieval peasant that introduced HIMSELF to goreshit

discord is running somewhere there. trust me

Relmyna Verenim (did you guys know i like her)

also has multiple monitors, not as many as sil but yk

probably runs like super slow and she has to resist the urge to snap her monitors in half every time she tries to open up any program

minecraft girlie (i also hc her as trans she's very loser scientist transfem coded)

she spends most of her time in the field but she likes her computers to write down her stuff

Yosano

has a tablet and a phone

uses them sparingly, but talks to ranpo a lot over texts

Vivec

has the newest phone models. always buys them instantly.

they're a prick

probably has a fucking typewriter rather than a computer because he's pretentious

Ranpo

has a tablet and a phone, uses them much more often than yosano

he seems like he prefers to read on screens than books imo

it also makes more sense, he doesn't like carrying a bunch of stuff around so having a tablet would be convenient

will text people while sitting directly across from them

Dagoth Ur/Voryn Dagoth

has a flip phone and that's it

Jouno

bc he's blind, he's not a fan of technology all that much, but uses screen readers and speaks to type.

more of a phone guy!!

has cut a laptop in half before

Nerevar

doesn't believe in computers

Kenji

also doesn't believe in computers

Lucien Lachance

owns a laptop but never uses it

written mail type of guy

Q/Yumeno

would go apeshit on a tablet.

probably a really big art fan, so really uses them for drawing and games and stuff

someone introduce this kid to a pc with a drawing pad

also loves music, would be the only normal technology user on this list istg

Haskill

owns something for every situation

nothing too fancy tbh

has a home pc, a laptop, a phone, and a tablet

uses them all for his job and has them all labelled and everything

has games on his phone for sheogorath

Ivan Goncharov

it's cause you're always on that damn rock

hates typing with every fiber of his being

smashes shit. has absolutely crushed pushkin's phone before and pushkin almost shot him

uses laptops and pcs out of necessity, uses walkie-talkies for communications because he just likes them

Ocheeva

biggest spreadsheet fan of all time

has a laptop that flips into a tablet

she loves organizing things and presenting them to the rest of the dark brotherhood

they don't listen to the immense power of a girl with a spreadsheet. like fools.

Bram

mp3 player or a phone just for music purposes

pays for every music subscription known to man

last.fm ass bitch

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betatrolls · 5 months

Text

so i keep getting this post on my feed about how people hate vriska because she's a girl or whatever blah blah blah this is old, but their phrasing was? interesting? they compared her to eridan and gamzee (as usual), so I'm gonna break it down real quick. they said gamzee is worse because he's a serial killer, and eridan is worse because he's a genocide apologist and a ""sexpest"" (good lord, that's a thirteen year old.) let's start with the comparison to gamzee, because girly, vriska is also a serial killer. that's a whole thing. not to mention gamzee was LITERALLY NOT OF SOUND MIND WHILE RAMPAGING. anyway, on to the eridan part. yes, eridan did attempt genocide, we get it. i literally cannot go five minutes on homestuck tumblr without seeing somebody complain about it. obviously, not a cool thing to do, but we can't just completely ignore the fact that vriska also killed people? like, at the scale we're working on, mass murder is mass murder. vriska isn't innocent of being weird about lowbloods, either, which brings us to our next topic. now, do i think it's right to call thirteen year olds sexpests?? no, obviously not, what the fuck. but if we're bringing that up, I'm not gonna shy away from mentioning that vriska sexually harassed tavros quite a few times in canon. concept explored, rant over. they're all bad people to a pretty strong degree (maybe gamzee less so than people make him out to be since, y'know, he was experiencing extreme symptoms of withdrawal), but they're all kids who grew up in a society that practically encouraged them to be that way. extra point, do i like eridan and gamzee more than i like vriska? yes. is that because i hate vriska, or think she's worse than them, or dislike trans women? absolutely not, that's a ludicrous accusation to jump to off of such minimal information. do i have my own unique feelings and opinions on characters that frequently change as i understand them better and are heavily influenced by outside factors as well as canon ones, which have nothing to do with prejudice or blindly following other people's malcontent? yes! I won't say that nobody hates vriska for baseless reasons, of course such a controversy-fueled fandom will breed some strange opinions, but "transmisogynistic murder apologist incapable of forming unique opinions" is a rather harsh label to attach to a mostly harmless preference.

no negativity intended towards the person who made the post I'm referencing, even if i came off a little harsh, although i do have them blocked because of how triggering that post was to me so I doubt they'll actually see this at any point.

(you can really see where in this post kankri forced his way to the front to engage in his favorite kind of discourse, huh. being plural is so funny actually. anyway im letting this post out of the drafts, im sure he wont mind)

#homestuck #homestuck vriska #vriska serket #eridan ampora #gamzee makara #homestuck eridan #homestuck gamzee #vriscourse #sort of? does this count as vriscourse? whatever #typing this at six in the morning after net zero sleep clearly I'm mentally well

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my-castles-crumbling · 4 months

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dancer anon here

reason for wanting to stay connected to being a girl: i feel good when i present feminine sometimes, I don't know why, while i dont feel like a girl or connected to that at all, i enjoy feeling pretty, and that kinda fuels the "cant not be partially a girl" because i like my feminine attributes (such as my breasts and eyelashes (i really like my eyelashes, they make me feel pretty)) but i tend to like my feminine attributes more when im alone and only /i/ can see myself and think "damn. im pretty today."

ballroom q: i tend to do more follower than leader now but i get to dance with my favorite dance teacher someitmes and shes really nice :D my favorite dance is paso doble (i do more latin ballroom than standard lol, but i do enjoy waltz the most out of standard dances lol (its the first dance i did with leader steps :DD)

correct pronouns: ik that its not really making a big deal to ask, but since im not out to many poeple outside of my friend group. i also dont want to correct my friends because im afraid it will reach someone outside of the group and theyre going to question it because in my school the majority of the students aren't really,,,, allies ig

neopronouns: have considered, didnt fit, so they/them is my go to because it is the one i feel the most comfortable with

confronting my friend: i do sometimes feel like confronting them about it, but its kinda scary because i hate confrontation because of the toxic friend i mentioned, so i dont think im gonna do anything about it (for now maybe?)

trauma: i am 97% sure i dont have any trauma relating to masculine people? however, my memory /is/ actually trash, so i could have just forgotten. the most likely thing that caused the fear would probably be the dance teacher with cold hands, because i hated his classes because they made me feel like dance is an obligation and i have to do everything /correctly/ even though i signed up because i enjoy dance. i also had to dance with him and his hands were cold and i dont like physical touch if im not initiating it (which is kinda why i dont dance with anyone anymore - a combination of physical touch, sweaty hands, and the close proximity. im even scared to dance with the little children i sometimes help dance with, because i dont know if they feel comfortable with physical touch which makes me feel icky)

also its not really something happened to me, its fear of something that /could/ happen (SA, etc)

also i still see that dance teacher around at the studio sometimes. he still scares me, but less? and when i talk to him sometimes, my brain tries to tell me im overexaggerating how much i dislike him, which i may be doing, but he /did/ ruin one of my favorite dances for me, so...

agender label: i do feel comfortable with the agender label, i believe, but ive never really met anyone else using it so i think i ust want to know ppl who also use it

you are also a wonderful human!!!

on another note, i am genuinely in tears thank you, you are so kind <3

Hello again!

So, there's four things I wanna address here:

With the pronouns/friends: Yes, it sounds like it might be a good idea to think more about the pros/cons of this. I still completely think that you deserve the respect of being gendered correctly, but if it's not safe for you to be pushing this,(secrets being shared, an unsupportive space, etc) then it might be a good idea to step back until it is safe to bring it up again. Remember though that you deserve to be supported and loved unconditionally and using your correct pronouns is something that should not be a burden to anyone.

Being agender: Have you considered finding people on here who identify similarly? It could be cool and validating to find a community of people who feel the same way. I know for me it was super exciting to find other nonbinary/genderfluid people.

Being touched: Okay, that makes sense. I definitely get not liking to be touched by people, especially people who give weird sensory input.

Ballroom: Oh, damn Paso Doble? I only know the very basics but it's SO different and cool! Respect <3

Lots of love!

#ask #asks #ask cas

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cwarscars · 8 months

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Hey bro i heard you like 🔥 so c'maaan gimmie your salt maaaan

Send me a “ 🔥 “ for an unpopular opinion.

(( gonna preface this by saying - if any of my moot moots are one side or the other, or consider themselves such - i got no beef with you. you're my homies, my real ones, my ride or dies; im open-minded to hearing your opinions. jus' dont send me any anon nastiness, ill cry REAL tears ))

honestly? i can't stand the black and white thinking in the rpc & fanfic communities as a whole. the whole pro-shipper/anti-shipper debate is extremely tiresome to apparently anyone who believes in nuance & grey situations.

like, on one side - you have people who will and do persecute people for the fucked up ships that they write. on the other, you have people who preach fiction is fiction and will willingly ignore the genuinly problematic people who take advantage of the notion of 'pro-shipping' in order to write their extreme fetishes ( ala, pedophilia / beastiality ).

i have always been anti-censorship. i always will be. i watch extreme cinema and read extreme manga / comics. nothing phases me. there are films that disturb me ( salo will /always/ make my uncomfy ) and obviously things i wont touch with a ten foot barge pole ( anything with kids / animals ) but for the most part, i'm very chill when it comes to what people want to write. i believe people should be honest about their kinks, preferences and things they wish to write.

if your partner is willing, it's consensual and tagged or under a read more. i have zero issues with it. but -

i have gotten sent hate before from 'pro-shippers' for stating my stance on anybody who wants to write smut with kids. literal hate for stating i'm against pedophilia. ( and im not talking about a 17 yr old being sexually active, im talking, like - literal children being sexualised ) like, what? i've been called purity police and all kinds of shit. like, me? purity police???? the bitch whose favourite comic is crossed and favourite manga, ichi the killer. LOL

my whole issue with the debate and the censorship / arguments in the rpc is that, it feels as though you HAVE to be one side or the other. you can't have a nuanced opinion, you can't understand that sometimes - there is a place for certain content, despite how extreme it is.

everybody is allowed a preference. you're allowed to be upset, offended, afraid, disgusted by or whatever else from x subject. every single individual is different and it's what makes us all beautiful. and i feel people need to really understand this. you can write extreme content but don't expect people to like it. on the other hand, if you don't like x content - don't attack someone for writing that content.

i just feel that there's wrong on both sides and i wish people would actually talk about the subject instead of throwing around attacks at each other. ultimately, whether anybody likes it or not - what you're writing is a footnote in the grand scheme of literature. you're writing on tumblr with your buddies and you're here to have fun.

if you wanna write an extreme sex scene with your consenting friends, go for it. if you don't want to write smut or you can't stand a certain ship, that is totally fine, too.

it's okay! both sides can be right without being aggressive or nasty.

like said, i would never label myself 'pro-ship' or any of that shit because i don't agree with that stance. i believe that there is a place for all content in all media in some, way, shape or form. i believe that rp is a slippery slope because it's a hobby that involves partners and is sociable. you have to please those around you and must understand that you can't wave around fetishes without a potential backlash. i agree people should write what they want, but i don't agree that there is a place for ( for example ) smut involving kids or animals. especially in the rpc. i've seen people 'joke' before about writing a pedo purely for exploration & to get a reaction. i can't imagine a more unenjoyable, questionable, horrific kind of thing to write in rp ( hell, even in media...that sort of character burns out and leaves creators depressed a/f).

i just wish people would talk, understand, and be open-minded. and - think about the bigger picture, too.

is this thing going to ride with you when you're offline?

probably not. so be respectful, have fun and just chill~

#(answered)#(ooc)#(saltmeme)#i went OFF-#its something im always chatting about though i just idk-#i hate the b&w way of thinking in every aspect of life haha #U ASED FOR SALT I GAVE IT 2 U BBY

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