#i enjoyed myself a little too much creating this post
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they're both fucking good | m.s. |
matt sturniolo x fem!reader x fem!friend
summary: y/n has spent the day and night drinking at the beach with her best friends jasmine and matt. after getting back to matt's, heavily intoxicated and freezing, she is desperate to get warm. who would have thought that desperation would lead her down the path it did.
warnings: SMUT; threesome (f/f/m); oral (f/m receiving); established friendship; face sitting; facials; dirty talk; unprotected sex; talk of alcohol consumption; 18+
notes: holy fuck i FINALLY finished this. i know i told you guys this would be out friday night...and i know that it's now sunday...but i let the weekend get away from me (oopsie). i also have absolutely ZERO experience with threesomes (both writing them AND participating in them lol) so i needed some time to make sure i did my research. as usual i still don't feel super confident in my writing of this one, but regardless i hope everyone enjoys!!!
disclaimer: i would feel icky if i posted a f/f/m threesome fic without making it clear that i am absolutely not trying to minimize wlw experiences (ESPECIALLY during pride month!!!) by adding a man to the mix. as a bi woman myself, i understand how common it is for straight men to fantasize about having sex with two women while simultaneously disregarding the significance of their sexuality. my intentions when writing this fic were not to promote this mindset in any way, it was simply because i love men and women. i would also like to make it clear that my two female characters, though not confirmed in the writing, are bisexual and not simply participating in the threesome to appease the male character. okay that's all, lots of love <33333
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“Oh my god I am so fucking cold!” You exclaimed through chattering teeth as you walked through Matt’s front door. “Me too, holy shit.” Replied your friend, Jasmine, as she began climbing the stairs leading to the main floor of the house. From behind you, you heard Matt chuckle before locking the front door behind you three. “I told you both that you shouldn’t have left your change of clothes here if you were planning on staying at the beach past sunset.” He said as you and Jasmine scampered into his room where you had left your overnight bags.
You, Jasmine, and Matt had spent the entire day — and much of the night — drinking at the beach with a big group of your mutual friends. The three of you had met at a party a few months ago, and had all bonded over your shared appreciation for being highly anti-social in large groups. Because of this, the three of you had created your own little sub-group within your circle of mutual friends, hence why you all had ended up leaving the beach before anyone else had — including Nick and Chris.
You and Jasmine hurried into Matt’s room, shivering with wet hair and not much clothing on besides bikinis, wondering why the copious amount of liquor that you both drank hadn’t kept you warm. Without wasting any time, you began stripping your damp articles of clothing off to replace them with the hoodie and sweatpants you had left in Matt’s room.
As you lifted your bikini top over your face, Jasmine dissolved into a fit of laughter. “Matt, no! Don’t look!” She said through her giggles, covering her own face with her hands but peering sneakily through her fingers. Her attempt at preserving your modesty was unfortunately too late, as Matt was already standing at his closet, gazing at your chest as you continued to strip. Too drunk and concerned with the idea of getting into warm clothes, you truly didn’t care if you were stripping in front of your two best friends.
Just as you pulled your oversized hoodie over your head, Jasmine’s muffled voice filled your ears. “Wait a minute.” She said, walking over to you with an expression on her face that you couldn’t quite read. “You have your nipples pierced?” Her words came out slurred, and you feigned a smile as you nodded. “Yeah, I’ve had them done since I was eighteen.” You replied shyly. Curiosity flashed across her face as she began toying with the hem of your hoodie. “Can I see them again?” She asked with a slight smirk that you returned with your own before placing your hands on top of hers to help her lift your sweater.
Immediately, her eyes drifted to your tits, and you watched as they flickered rapidly from one to the other. “They’re so pretty, Y/n.” She said breathily, and you giggled nervously in response. The two of you were so transfixed in your own world — Jasmine still captivated by your tits and you immersed in her beautiful facial features — that you both nearly forgot that Matt was standing just a few feet away; watching the entire interaction in shock.
His feet were planted to the floor, and his body felt like a cement statue as he could do nothing but stare at his two best friends in their intimate moment. Even though part of him felt like he shouldn’t be watching you two, his eyes were glued to your places a few feet in front of him, and no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t pry them away. So he continued to watch as Jasmine moved her hands from the hem of your sweater to your ribcage, before eventually using her thumbs to lightly brush against the metal bars on your nipples. He felt the front of his pants tighten when your eyes fluttered closed from the sensation, and finally his jaw dropped when Jasmine brought her lips up to meet yours.
Your breath hitched from the shock of feeling your friend’s mouth on yours, but the shock quickly dissolved into lust as she continued to swirl her thumbs across your sensitive nipples. Wrapping your arms around her neck, you began deepening the kiss as a way to assure her that what she was doing was okay, and you felt a soft hum leave her lips in acknowledgment. As your tongues fought for dominance in one another’s mouths, you relished in the distinct taste of peppermint in her delicate mouth.
Both of your hands began frantically travelling across each other’s bodies as you both grew needier, and the two of you began hurriedly stumbling towards Matt’s bed in the middle of the room. Jasmine laid you down on the soft mattress — your head on the very edge of the bed — and immediately straddled you, never breaking the kiss. Your hands moved to her own bikini-clad chest, where you effortlessly lifted the material to free her tits before immediately grabbing one in each of your hands.
Matt continued to watch the two girls play with each other, his mind scrambled by what was happening in front of his very eyes. His cock throbbed inside his jeans, and he was desperate to get some relief. He palmed himself lightly above his clothing, but as the girls began grinding against each other in his bed, he knew that he was going to need more alleviation than that.
Just then, Jasmine detached her lips from your neck and dragged her eyes from you to the space behind your head. Following her lead, you turned your head to the side and immediately cast your gaze on Matt. Even from a few feet away, you could see his chest rising and falling rapidly. If his flushed cheeks and wild eyes weren’t enough to let you know how he felt about the scene in front of him, the sizeable bulge in the front of his jeans confirmed it.
“You okay with this Matty?” Jasmine’s tone was light and mischievous, but you felt your own heart flutter at the reminder that Matt was able to see all of you in this way. He shifted his pants slightly but nodded eagerly, enjoying the view but clearly growing antsy from just watching. You smiled at him once his travelling eyes moved from your half naked body to your eyes, and you felt a wave of confidence overtake you. “You coming?” You asked, and watched as his eyes widened slightly. Above you, Jasmine giggled seductively before reaching her arm in his direction; encouraging him. Even though he had seemed shocked, he didn’t hesitate for long before walking over to the two of you on the bed.
Matt positioned himself in a sitting position at the edge of the bed only inches from where the two of you were laying. Propping yourself up on your elbows, you hooked a finger in his shirt collar and pulled him down towards you. Immediately, he attached his lips to yours, kissing you deeply as Jasmine’s mouth began moving across your body. Everything about Matt’s body language and actions told you that he was starving for more, and you didn’t hesitate to gently palm him through his jeans.
After leaving sloppy kisses along your stomach, Jasmine crawled back up to your face, at which time Matt detached his mouth from you and began kissing her. From your lower angle, you watched in awe as your two best friends’ tongues danced together in unison, and hummed in contentment when Matt began playing with your sensitive nipples. Growing impatient as your friends continued to kiss one another, you leaned up and joined the kiss. Sloppily, the three of you desperately moved your lips between each others; tongues swirling and teeth biting bottom lips.
Eventually, Jasmine began descending your body once again; her mouth leaving sloppy kisses down your neck and stomach before pausing above your throbbing heat. At the same time, Matt stood up at the edge of the bed and began removing his own clothes. “Is this okay?” Jasmine asked as she began toying with your bikini bottoms; that cheeky glint still present in her eyes. You couldn’t help but nod, your body was on fire from the heat of the situation you found yourself in the middle of. As Jasmine began removing your bottoms, you felt Matt gently grab you under your arms and pull you closer to the edge of the bed. With your head now dangling off the side of the mattress, your view was of Matt staring down at you, stroking his hard cock.
Suddenly, your focus was pulled from the beautiful sight in front of you by Jasmine’s warm mouth against your reactive clit. A moan was pulled from your lips as she began swirling her tongue against your nerves, and you felt pleasure beyond anything you had ever felt before. Jasmine continued to use her talented mouth to fuck you as Matt gazed down at the two of you deep in your own world of pleasure. His view was mind blowing, and he lost all sight of control when your mouth released its loud cries of pleasure. As your mouth opened in ecstasy, he took the opportunity to gently grab onto either side of your face and slide his throbbing dick into your mouth.
Your eyes blew open in shock, but one look at Matt’s glazed over expression of relief was enough to amplify your own sense of arousal. Just as Jasmine slid two slender fingers into your core, Matt began thrusting his member into you. He started off slow and shallow — testing the waters to ensure that you were comfortable — but as your moans of pleasure vibrated his cock he began driving it faster down your throat. Overwhelmed with the unfamiliar sensation of pleasuring one person while also being pleasured by another, you began to lose control of yourself and grabbed onto Jasmine’s long hair in a desperate attempt at feeling grounded. It didn’t take long for Jasmine’s work to bring you close to an orgasm, and your eyes filled with tears as your pleasure began to overtake you. “F-fuck.” You mumbled around Matt’s dick as Jasmine’s fingers began pumping faster in and out of you.
The build up of your orgasm was so staggering that you were having a hard time letting go, especially with two sets of eyes on your writhing body. Jasmine detached her mouth from your clit but kept pumping her fingers into you as she leaned up close to your face. She smirked down at you and watched closely as your throat filled with Matt’s cock over and over. “You gonna cum baby?” She asked, her fingers never losing rhythm inside of you as you sent her pleading eyes. If you could speak, you would have begged her to not stop, but all you could do was release a gurgled moan. Just then, your eyes rolled to the back of your head as your orgasm tore through you like a freight train. Your mouth went slack around Matt’s cock and your back arched off the bed as Jasmine’s fingers continued to fuck you through your orgasm; even after you felt the relief from squirting all over them.
“Holy fuck.” You heard Matt’s gravelly voice through your clouded thoughts as your orgasm began to subside. His hips stilled — he was on the verge of finishing himself — and his grip on the sides of your face tightened as he attempted to regain his composure. With gasping breaths, you managed to calm your racing heart. “Hmm, you taste so good Y/n. Kiss me Matty, and see for yourself.” Jasmine’s voice was breathy and seductive, and without hesitation Matt leaned above you to kiss her deeply; moaning from the taste that your arousal had left behind on her tongue.
Just the thought of your juices being shared between your two best friends stirred up a new wave of arousal within you, and you pressed your thighs together to gain some sort of relief. However, it wasn’t long before Matt and Jasmine broke their kiss and peered down at you, Matt brushing a gentle thumb across your bottom lip. “You ready to get used some more, Y/n?” Asked Jasmine, and you didn’t hesitate before nodding your head eagerly.
Immediately, Jasmine grabbed your legs and encouraged you to spin around on the bed so that instead of your head dangling off the side, it was your legs. Matt grabbed onto both of your knees and guided them open before staring intently at your glistening core. “Your mouth was so good, can’t wait to feel your pussy around me.” His dirty words went right to your heat, and Jasmine furthered your anticipation with her own string of filth. “Mmm. Your mouth clearly knows how to make a cock feel good, let’s see if it knows its way around a cunt.” She gazed down at your puffy lips as she began removing her string bikini bottoms, and you whimpered softly when Matt slid his veiny cock tauntingly along your folds.
Jasmine lifted her leg and straddled your face, making you lose your sense of clear vision as her core hovered above your trembling mouth. So close you could reach it with your tongue if you tried, you took a moment to admire her. Bright pink and dripping from her own arousal, it took everything out of you to not grab her by her hips and hold her against your mouth. You were pulled from her trance suddenly by Matt driving himself into you. Your walls seized around him and you gasped at the feeling of his size stretching you out; your mouth turning into an ‘O’ shape. Seeing her opportunity, it was at this moment that Jasmine finally dropped her heat onto your face. Wasting no time, you immediately began devouring her folds; admiring her sweetness and relishing in the erotic noises that were slipping from her mouth all from you.
With Matt pounding into you, you were having a hard time focusing on what you were doing with your mouth as all you wanted to do was cry out in pleasure. Too pussy drunk to give into that temptation, you wrapped your arms around her smooth thighs and held her firmly against your swirling tongue. “Oh my fucking god, Y/n. S-so good.” Her words were choppy but she managed to get them all out before slowly grinding her hips against your face. You were feeling used in the best way possible, knowing that two people attached to different parts of you were able to feel so good. “Oh yeah, you’re so wet for me.” Matt cooed as he grabbed both of your legs and hooked them around his waist. You heard a half-hearted laugh from above you. “Pretty sure I got her started, Matt.” Jasmine taunted, and you suddenly felt her shift on your face; leaning towards your core while simultaneously moaning. “Oh yeah baby, that’s all for me, isn’t it.”
You moaned against her pussy when you felt her place a finger on your sensitive clit; and then nearly lost all control when she began rubbing it in tempo with Matt’s driving hips. Already overstimulated, you knew it wouldn’t be long before you came again; especially with Jasmine’s sweet juices dripping down your chin. “Mmm, gonna cum soon.” Jasmine cried out suddenly, her previously alluring tone turning into one more high-pitched and desperate. “F-fuck, me too.” Matt groaned out, his movements growing quicker and choppier. Feeling your own orgasm building up, just thinking about the pleasure that your other two friends were feeling caused the tidal wave to crash down once again.
You couldn’t stifle the throaty moans from escaping your lips and travelling directly to Jasmine’s now pulsating core as you both reached your powerful orgasms. You felt her legs shake on either side of your foggy head just as your own shook around Matt’s waist. Your nails dug into the soft skin on her inner thighs in the same way that hers dug into your hips. Your muffled moans used her body as a vessel to escape your mouth, as she sobbed out enough profanities for the both of you.
Matt’s orgasm wasn’t far behind yours and Jasmine’s. Just as you lapped up her residual cum, Matt let out a sequence of deep grunts before pulling his throbbing cock out of you and resting it on your stomach, pumping it a few times before releasing a river of hot liquid along your abdomen. You heard Jasmine gasp at the view she had had of Matt’s euphoric moment, and you savoured the satisfying feeling of his cum gathering on your stomach. Soon after, Jasmine lifted her heat off of your face, staying on her hands and knees above you but finally giving you your sense of sight back. Chest heaving, Matt looked down at you with dazed eyes and shot you a gentle smile as your eyes adjusted to the light.
Just centimetres above you, Jasmine’s voluminous breasts hung in the air and you reached up with your tongue and licked them both, not ready for this event to be over. Jasmine didn’t seem to want that either, as she released a soft moan before leaning down to your stomach and dropping small kisses along it. She then used her tongue and collected the pool of Matt’s cum in her mouth before leaning back towards your face and placing a hand on your jaw. Using her grip on your jaw to open your mouth, she leaned down until your lips were nearly touching before spitting Matt’s collected seed into your mouth. “Holy fuck.” You heard Matt whisper under his breath, clearly taken aback by the sight of his cum being shared between his two friends.
You swallow his cum before smiling flirtatiously at him. “You got another round in you?” You asked him as Jasmine climbed off of you completely and you propped yourself up on your elbows to take a look at his still-hard member. Without saying anything, Matt simply smirked and climbed onto the bed before attaching his lips to yours once again. He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you close to him; deepening the kiss — the taste of all three of you travelling between your tongues — as he spun you around so that he was laying at the head of the bed with you hovering on top of him.
Still kissing you, he released a quick moan as Jasmine began bobbing her head up and down his shaft. He gripped your ass tightly with one hand and a clump of her hair with the other as his pleasure began to increase, and finally he groaned against your mouth before pulling your lips away from him. Confused, you were able to take only a quick glance at his fucked out face before he grabbed you by your waist and pulled you up towards his face. Keeping your trembling figure hovered above his puffy lips, he then grabbed Jasmine and encouraged her to straddle his hips. Once the two of you were both in the correct position, he wrapped one hand around your thigh and another around Jasmine’s waist and pushed you both down onto two separate parts of his body.
Before you had even settled onto his face, his tongue began working magic around your clit. Your head rolled back and you caught a glimpse of Jasmine riding his dick behind you. Gripping onto the headboard of the bed for support, you couldn’t help but release incessant moans as Matt’s mouth worked your overstimulated cunt. “S-so good Matty.” You cried out and Jasmine hummed in agreement. Looking in between your legs, you were met with the breathtaking view of Matt’s cold blue eyes glued to you as he buried himself in your heat. The two of you maintained blurry eye contact for a long time, Jasmine filling in the silence with enough dirty phrases for the three of you combined.
“Oh god,” Her voice was trembling, “Your cock is so big Matty. And Y/n, you’re giving me the best view right now, grinding your pretty cunt against Matt like that. S-so hot.” At her words, Matt gripped your ass with both hands and held you in place before drilling his tongue against your clit at an ungodly pace. “O-oh god, gonna cum again.” You practically screamed out as your body became once again overtaken by that fluttering sensation. “M-me t-too.” Jasmine’s voice came out much less confident than it had been just moments before, and before long your synchronized moans filled the room as you were both riding out yet another mind-bending orgasm all over Matt.
Feeling more than dazed from your third orgasm of the night, you hissed and lifted your core off of Matt’s face when he continued to swirl his tongue through your swollen folds. “M-matt please no, can’t take anymore.” You pleaded with him between your legs. Matt fake-pouted up at you as Jasmine continued bouncing on his cock. “Please sweetheart, just want one more taste.” He wined out, causing you to sigh before slowly beginning to drop your pelvis back onto his face. Just as his tongue barely grazed your dripping core, the unmistakable sound of a door creaking open filled the room.
“Are ya’ll sl — oh fuck! Sorry, fuck!”
All three of you froze all movements and spun your heads to the door, catching a glimpse of Chris’ panicked face just before he hurriedly shut the bedroom door. “Uh oh.” You whispered, your hips now back to hovering above Matt’s mouth; hanging open in shock. Jasmine suddenly broke out into a fit of hysterical laughter so contagious that you and Matt both had no choice but to join in. “Okay well, I guess that killed it.” She said behind you through her laughter before beginning to climb off of Matt’s hips. “No.” Matt grabbed her wrist and your thigh, his tone so void of all laughter that the two of you had no choice but to snap your eyes onto him. “We’re not done yet. Both of you, get on your knees.” His voice was so commanding, you turned your head to look at Jasmine in surprise, only to find a sly smirk covering her flushed face.
The both of you followed his orders and climbed from your respective places on top of his body and onto the floor; side by side. Once he was able to, Matt also pulled his naked body off of the bed and stood on his feet in front of you both. Looking up at him through your eyelashes, all memory of the embarrassment you felt from Chris walking in was replaced by a new wave of arousal. You opened your mouth and stuck your tongue out, and he slapped his cock against it a few times before finally leaving it there; granting you non-verbal permission to begin playing with the tip.
As you swirled your tongue around the ridges of his head, Jasmine began kissing and licking along his shaft. Keeping your eyes on him the entire time, you watched in awe at his heaving chest and pouty lips. Once Jasmine’s mouth moved down to his balls where she began sucking them, you brought your lips all the way down his shaft; taking all of him in your mouth before bobbing your head up and down fervently. Caught up in the new sensation of two warm mouths toying with his manhood, Matt’s hands immediately reached for both of your heads, where he grabbed fistfuls of hair and held on tightly.
Small grunts left his lips as both you and Jasmine worked together to make him feel good, and you allowed his hand to push your head down as far as it could go before gargling on every inch of his member; vibrations of your own moans working his cock even more. Eventually, his grip on your hair loosened and you removed your lips from his dick to catch your breath. Without hesitating, Jasmine took over for you and you watched her full lips swallow Matt’s thick cock with ease before you began fondling his balls under her chin.
You watched as his eyes rolled to the back of his head, clearly approaching his orgasm. Jasmine pulled her head back, letting Matt’s cock fall from her mouth with a pop before both of you began running your tongues teasingly along either side of his length. Tongues swirling, the two of you faced each other. When your performing mouths both reached his tip, you brought your lips to hers and you both began kissing deeply. You moaned from the feeling of her soft lips as her tongue entered your mouth, and Matt began pumping his own dick as he watched the two of you impassioned with one another just below him.
“Shiiit,” Matt hissed, causing both of you to pull apart and look up at his trembling frame. “Open your mouths.” He commanded, and you two obliged with seductive smiles planted on your faces. Matt’s eyes glazed over and, with a quick shiver and a husky moan, vigorously pumped his twitching cock as his second orgasm engulfed him. You hummed in satisfaction as you felt your tongue get painted with his cum, and eagerly lapped it up before it had a chance to drip down your chin.
His pumping hand slowed its movements as he milked his dick dry, and his fiery gaze turned into one far more lethargic and relaxed as he took in your matching blissed out faces coated in his own seed. Catching your breath, you turned to look at Jasmine and her face was just as euphoric and lacquered in cum as yours, and you collected a drop that had landed on her eyebrow on your thumb before licking it off.
After what could have been hours of silent, uncertain glances between the three of you, the sullenness was broken by simultaneous laughter. Starting off as nervous giggling, it quickly transformed into full-body unrestrained howling as you fell onto your back, Jasmine clutched her stomach, and Matt leaned forward and braced himself on his knees. “How the actual fuck did that just happen?” Matt finally managed to ask through tears of laughter. “Oh my god, there’s no way we all just had a threesome!” You exclaimed as you tried to pull your body off of the floor; only just now realizing what had just transpired over the past forty five minutes.
“I’m just shocked we’ve all never done that before.” Added Jasmine, finally getting control over her laughter. You and Matt found each other’s eyes, shocked at Jasmine’s words, and broke into yet another fit of hysterics.
“Okay, okay. I need a shower right now.” You stated, finally getting to your feet. “Jesus, so do I. Every square inch of me is sticky.” Your face scrunched in mild disgust from Jasmine’s notorious lack of filter, but you couldn’t exactly disagree. “Round two in the shower?” You joked, and watched as both of your friends giggled once again. “Definitely not, I think my dick would fall off.” Chuckled Matt as he found a pair of boxers and began putting them on. “You two go, try not to do any weird shit, and I’ll go get some water for us.” You sighed dramatically, pretending to be truly gutted that he wouldn’t join, but truthfully you were grateful considering how raw your insides were feeling. “Fine, but you’ll be missing out Matty.” Replied Jasmine, adding onto your pretend narrative by jokingly biting her bottom lip as the two of you hurriedly walked through his bedroom door and into the washroom.
As soon as he heard the shower turn on, Matt threw on some sweats and headed into the kitchen to grab some drinks and snacks. Once he turned the corner from the hallway to the main living area, he stopped in his tracks when he saw Chris sitting on the couch; staring at him with a cheeky smile. Knowing that there was nothing he could say to deflate the situation, Matt chose to ignore him and continued over to the fridge to grab some sodas; however he had to fight the small smirk that he felt travelling to his lips.
Unable to stand the silence, Chris spoke up. “Dude.” He began as Matt hid his face in the fridge. “How the hell did you manage to get yourself in that situation?” Matt moved from the fridge to the pantry where he hunted for something to eat, once again unable to contain a chuckle from how mind blowing the scenario had been. “Honestly, I’m not even sure.” He replied, making Chris laugh. “But like how did you initiate it? Like did you just ask them if they wanted to fuck or what? I mean I knew you were drunk when you left the beach earlier, but there’s no way you were drunk enough to be that confident.” He pried, extremely curious as to how his typically reserved brother would have the balls to fuck his two best friends at the same time. “I didn’t initiate it.” Matt replied truthfully as he pulled a bag of chips out of the pantry. “They both sorta just went for it.” At this, Chris’ mouth dropped. “Holy shit, that’s mad hot.” He said before getting up from the couch and walking closer to where his brother was standing.
“You wanna give me some details?” Chris asked, blue eyes twinkling with interest, but Matt’s immediate look of disgust was enough to let him know that he wasn’t going to get much out of him. “Okay okay fine, but can you at least tell me which one was better?” Annoyed, Matt rolled his eyes at his brother as he popped a handful of chips into his mouth and began heading back in the direction of his room. “Chris, you know my friends are off limits for you. You’re not about to collect this information to try to slide in.” At this, Chris groaned. “That’s not what I’m doing, kid. I’m just curious if one was better than the other. Please just give me that, then I swear I’ll never bring it up again.”
Matt couldn’t keep up his nonchalant image anymore, knowing that he had done something that his brother was so shocked by. Before now, Chris had never acted so outwardly impressed by Matt’s sexual endeavours, because truthfully, he had never before done anything even close to being as crazy as what he had done tonight. Fucking his two best friends at the same time was something that he had occasionally fantasized about, but never ever considered actually doing. But now that it had actually happened, and that it had been so good, he could feel his ego inflate by the minute. He finally let a prideful smile take over his face as he reached his bedroom door before turning back around to regard his dumbfounded brother. With his hand on the doorknob and a satisfied glint in his eyes, Matt finally responded with a tranquil sigh. “They’re both fucking good.”
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#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo fanfic#matthew sturniolo x you#matthew sturniolo smut#the sturniolos#the sturniolo triplets
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WIP Wednesday
Thanks for the tag @thewholelemon! Your snippet looks hilarious!!! I need more details (Baz, you’re a killjoy!)
Today's post is dedicated to @cutestkilla, who is determined to figure out all my secrets when it comes to The Eternal Life of Baz Pitch. So here is a DELUGE of clues to put up on your murder wall and connect with pins and string. MWAHAHA!
A fabulous playlist. You know what goes well with the angst buffet I'm serving up on AO3? An epic soundtrack. Do the songs match up to specific chapters? Do the lyrics mean anything? Is it just vibes? Who knows. Enjoy. (Spotify Link)
Tidbits from my Dead Darlings doc. No spoilers here. All tidbits are from an entire subplot that I cut very early and all names and identifying details have been redacted.
Apparently, such were the times in which [redacted] was living. People kept all manner of useless things in their homes. Shelves with books they didn’t read. Baskets whose sole purpose was to display knick-knacks. And, apparently, time pieces that did not actually keep time.
Or this little bit of dialogue:
“[Redacted]! How can you not know this?!”
[Redacted does a highly specific motion I cannot include].
[Redacted] groans. “[Redacted pet name that should not be a pet name but for some reason is and must also be scratched], what am I going to do with you?”
“Love me anyway, I imagine.”
[Everything after this point definitely needs to be redacted...]
3. A couple beta comments from @thewholelemon. Have I mentioned she's the best beta in the world? Seriously, all the kudos for this fic should be sent directly to Jenny.
happy kitten or grumpy kitten? lol
HORRIFYING. like something out of a scary movie.
LOL braden!!! polycule!!! this is so funny!
Side note: fuck this guy
Have fun unraveling that knot of nonsense, Dre. [Cackles like the dark and disappears in a cloud of smoke.]
For everyone else, if you got this far, thank you. Have a little chapter 3 snippet under the cut, this time featuring current Baz.
Baz could make this difficult. He could wait for the boy to hit on him some more. To ask him his name or if he’d like to have dinner. But, Baz is feeling rather lonely after his unsuccessful hunt for a one-night stand yesterday and this boy can be good enough. So, he takes a step closer and lifts the boy’s chin with a careful finger instead. The boy’s eyes meet his immediately, which is precisely what Baz wanted. The whole scene sets off another round of barking from the tiny dog.
“Take me home with you,” Baz whispers.
Hellos and high-fives. Tag, you're it.
@thewholelemon, @roomwithanopenfire, @noblecorgi, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @youarenevertooold, @cutestkilla, @bookish-bogwitch, @emeryhall, @valeffelees, @beastmonstertitan, @raenestee, @arthurkko, @iamamythologicalcreature, @hushed-chorus, @rimeswithpurple, @aristocratic-otter, @cattocavo, @larkral, @drowninginships, @artsyunderstudy, @whatevertheweather, @brilla-brilla-estrellita, @comesitintheclover, @shrekgogurt
#i enjoyed myself a little too much creating this post#what does that say about me?#that cosmic quiz making the rounds said I make a “good friend and best enemy”#not sure which applies to this post#the eternal life of baz pitch#addie larue x snowbaz#baz pitch#simon snow#carry on fanfiction#wip wednesday
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writing shorter oneshots has actually been so much fun recently. like, seriously, i love doing them. it’s great! im having fun, and being able to sit down and write something short n sweet has been super nice
#i think. with adaptive nature i started to expect a little bit too much from myself with the chapters#like. yeah. i wanted it to be good obviously#but i might have been holding myself to too high of a standard#which was why the chapters took so long to be posted#because they would be written but id find a hundred problems with it (where. there probably wasnt any) and simply delete the whole thing#i am working on reminding myself that sometimes my writing can be bad. that its fine for my writing to be bad#but im still working on that#which is why these short things are good. because they dont need to be the best things ever. they just need to be good#they just need to be something i enjoy creating#not that i didnt enjoy writing adaptive nature! just that im a perfectionist. and that started to affect me slightly#but now. looking back on it. it was good#all the things that got deleted were probably good too. i just couldnt see that#oops. sorry for the mini rant#didnt mean for it to turn into that lol#juno.talks
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Astrology Observations 🤍✨
Hi friends! Welcome back to another post 💅🏻 today we’ll be looking at astro observations! Please like, comment and reblog to help this blog grow ✨
Aries + Taurus pairing as friends/couple are the show stoppers. They draw attention wherever they go, there’s so much fire between them. Although Taurus is an Earth sign, Taurus does enjoy the finer things in life and passion! Aries helps to bring the heat in the connection and the two have a lot in common. Aries is headstrong, Taurus is as well. Both are self starters and independent. Both know what they want (taurus is a fixed sign) and both know what it takes to create + sustain it.
Aquarius sun experienced being the quiet one in group settings, especially if they were with people they didn’t necessarily understand or get along with. Its not that they aren’t smart, or capable of human interaction. They’re actually great at it, they just preserve their energy for better people/interactions.
Gemini’s love to story tell and embellish their stories! They love adding jokes, flare, and drama to their stories. They’re a bit like Leo-great at storytelling and communicating! Both Leo and Gemini love to entertain 🤍✨
Transits in your 4th house-family will require your attention more, and specifically the Mother could be around a lot more. Physically, emotionally and mentally even if you may not have a great connection. She may try to wiggle her way in your life during these 4th house transits. If you work with ancestors, they will be sending you dreams and messages day to day even more than usual. Expect the things that you need to liberate yourself from will come up in dreams, or day to day. Dreaming of your childhood for example can be triggering to some, whether the dream was good or bad.
Sagittarius are often quiet but have a lot to say when in a proper group setting. They think a lot of the world around them, and I notice they like to be in situations where they can mansplain 🤣 but offering advice and mediating conversations is their specialty. They’re blunt, honest, and get to the point.
Leo women often walk with a lot of respect, flare and spirit. Their head is held high.
Cancer women love going out and love staying home! They have their homebody moments too 💅🏻 cancers love a good time! And are not stuck in their shell as ya’ll may think
Cancer women may also be the type to have fairy tattoos, or tattoos that are delicate. They have tattoos that have a whimsical charm to them, even if it may be considered “dark.” There is an ethereal vibe to it!
Virgo women love planning, decorating and getting family together! Or who they consider family. They love setting the mood, setting the atmosphere, environment. They would be great party planners/wedding planners!
Pisces women may be into cars 👀
Scorpio moon women may get into nursing at some point or considered studying that!
Gemini women may love doing their own nails, and being proud of their art! They love to show off anything that expresses their skill.
Gemini Venus women want to speak different languages but may get frustrated at the effort required 😂 as a gemini venus myself yes
Capricorn moon women may enjoy having a minimalistic setup in their room, colors that are light and simple, but with a dash of darkness or vivid color! They love creating balance in their room and have an eye for intensity through detail
Leo rising commands all the attention in the room for themselves. But I’ve noticed if a Leo rising is not feeling confident in themselves, they can come across as arrogant, and self absorbed. It’s because part of them needs their own attention and space, but the native isn’t realizing that. Or the native doesn’t know how to meet their needs.
Thank you all for being here! I really appreciate it 🥹💗 Please enjoy the little observations I put together! Feel free to like comment and reblog ✨
Paid Readings 💗✨
#astrology community#devi post#astrology#tarotcommunity#divination#tarot deck#tarot#witchcraft#tarot reading#astro posts#astrology notes#astro notes#astro observations#pick a pile#pick a picture#pick one#pick a card romance#pick a card
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oh we’re still so young, desperate for attention
this was super experimental so i will talk about my process (+ clearer version) under the cut
i’ve been looking at a lot of “messier” or more textured painting styles recently and an artist that stuck out to me is clariondeluna ! they posted a self-portrait recently that i really liked and i was super interested in the brushwork seen in their work. i love all the textures and how the shapes feel so loose yet everything is so detailed.
that’s not a method for me at all!!!! i cannot paint like that at all and the stuff i like to paint is very different to theirs. which is okay!!!! i had no intention to copy this artists style so closely like with what i tried to do in my raiden painting, i just wanted to try this style out :^)
it’s been a goal of mine to avoid over-rendering like i tend to do a lot, and i think i’ve been doing good with that recently! the mindset i’ve got going on right now is that if i find myself staring at it too hard for too long, i have to leave it and move on. if there’s still something wrong with it, i can fix it later once ive got a fresh view!
i’ve been trying a lot of things with my art this year. i always try to challenge myself with each piece, and to end the year off i wanted to be as uncomfortable as i possibly could be with this painting. i let myself draw whatever i wanted because i still wanted to enjoy it, but everything i did in this process was new, including parts of the subject matter.
i’ve never drawn a head at an angle like this, and i struggle with drawing mouths open. i don’t do bold lighting like this, and if i do, it’s not fire. i’ve never drawn fire! i also rarely work with warm colours and i hate using green, so i combined those to be my colour palette. i like working cleanly so instead of having a dozen different layers for one section, each section only had 1-2 layers for rendering. instead of clipping masks i would simply paint over things loosely and clean it up later. i never like having limbs cut off in a drawing so i had his other arm go GOD knows where. i don’t like weird patterned backgrounds so i made myself figure out how to like it!
IS THIS MY FAVOURITE PIECE OF ALL TIME. no. absolutely not. but i’m very proud of how this came out with all the challenges i put on myself. i WANTED to get better at these things and be more broad with my art, both in terms of the styles and subjects i portray.
okay let’s talk about wtf this drawing is
for those who don’t know, the design in this painting is my fatui/“Father” lyney fan design (read the design post here). the concept isnt super complicated and i don’t really have much explanation for it, but i wanted to combine the story of how lyney wanted a delusion before getting his vision, fire eating circus acts and how olympic medalists will bite their medal to prove it’s real??? don’t quote me on that i’m like 75% sure that’s a thing that happens. i don’t watch sports though so im just believing someone i heard on the internet ages ago.
anyways. i think fire eating acts are cool. and i think the fact that lyney wanted a delusion is very interesting to me. scratches my brain in the right places. and yk as a magician lyneys character revolves a lot around fooling people and creating illusions so i guess what im saying here is that lyney is trying to prove to himself that this power he’s been bestowed is real. bc his whole life his only constant has been lynette so he is trying to see if he can trust this new power. cause i guess this is an alternate universe where lyney does eventually become “Father” but he never got his vision ??? idk im not making lore for this i just wanted to dress up this funny little guy.
ok i’m done
thanks for reading
here’s my dog
#my art#fanart#genshin impact#genshin fanart#lyney#genshin lyney#lyney fanart#digital art#artists on tumblr#artists of tumblr
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All Kinds of Trouble
Alfie Solomons x Reader, Fluff, 1.2k words
Warnings: Cursing
A/N: Hi guys!! Ok so maybe hiatus is over? I'm trying to be gentle with myself and not hold myself to high standards in posting schedules. Again, therapy and Bar prep are a lot to handle rn, but I was able to do this little piece! This is based of a request sent in by my sweet friend @jassiefayee !!!! I hope you enjoy this angel!! Anyway, love you all so much! Have an amazing day!
Alfie didn’t find peace in many things. The business and all. Made him toss and turn at night, and in the daylight caused him to explode from the pure idiocy of people around him.
But walks in the park with Cyril? Now that gave him peace. With Cyril by his side, anyone who may have wanted to cause trouble stayed far away. Cyril’s imposing stature and mean looking face kept many men looking to scrap at bay, but little did they know that Cyril was by far the sweetest dog in Camden. And the fresh air did Alfie good. Being out in the park, feeling the breeze, hearing children and birds milling about created a sort of temple for him. A quiet place for him to let his mind rest, talk to himself (or God if he had a particular question), or just hum to the beat of Cyril's paws on the ground. This was his rest. This was his peace.
Now it should be noted, that one of the reasons that Alfie loved this particular park was that it was free of distractions for both him and Cyril. While Cyril was a very sweet and good natured dog who hardly ever caused an unnecessary ruckus, he was still a dog. And dogs have this strange habit, if not fantastic ability, to completely change the course of their owner's life.
So it was during a brisk walk on a fine November day where Alfie was suddenly pulled with all the force of heaven’s angels by Cyril’s lead through the park. And just as quick as he was yanked he was halted, nearly tripping over his boots and coat, and falling into Cyril and what might possibly be one of those treacherous angels.
It had become a relatively new habit for you to take a few moments of your day to sit in the park. Whether strolling, reading, or simply listening to the music of the city, you found the meditative state you entered in the park particularly divine. Spending all day cooped up in the house was not doing anyone any favors, and your mother insisted that you look at the sky, breathe in fresh air, or do something to get your energy out. And you enjoyed the respite from your family’s eyes and ears, and the view you caught of other people’s comings and goings. Often making up stories for the familiar faces that passed your eyes.
You had seen Mr. Solomons and his a dog before. It was hard to miss them. Both imposing. Even if Mr. Solomons wasn’t physically too tall, the air in which he carried himself made him seem absolutely monstrous. And the dog he walked along with came with a silent stature to match. When you mentioned to your mother that Mr. Solomons frequented your park, she all but forbid you to go to the park again. He was dangerous. A brute. Nothing good was associated with him. He was an animal. Damned.
Everyone in Camden had a story about Mr. Solomons. Even if they personally had never met him, they knew someone who knew someone who had crossed his path and suffered greatly. Fewer than those who crossed his path, were the women who had the pleasure of spending an evening with him. Demanding. Particular. Incredibly cross with hardly a smile crossing his firm mouth and creased brow. You had heard them all, many a time. And each time you heard the stories more fantastical and gory and outrageous they became. From the way the neighbors spoke of him, he might has well been an ogre who ate good men for supper. A confidant of the devil himself.
Yet those stories never deterred you from letting your eyes wander over to him when he made his way to the park. Surely observing doesn’t damn one’s soul right? And wondering if stories are true surely cannot condemn. Besides, he was never close enough to truly make a difference. A glance and gaze and thought were all that you experienced with the fearsome King of Camden. Until this afternoon, when that monstrous dog came charging at you with a gleeful and slobbery smile. And for whatever reason you never moved from your seat. You stayed planted on your spot on the bench, waiting for whatever was to come. And your supposed attack was merely a disgusting kiss to the neck and chin from the dog, and happy pants from it as well. It’s master, cursing and bellowing at hundred pound puppy who was uninterested in the threats of its flustered master.
You couldn’t help but giggle at the reddened face of Mr. Solomons, clearly out of breathe from the exertion of the sudden chase. “Mr. Solomons are you quite alright? Do you need to sit?”
“Hmm? No, no don’t worry about me angel, m’fine. This damn dog knows better than to run full force in a park. You alright love? Hope Cyril didn’t scare ya.”
You smiled warmly at him, and he was convinced he must have died in the chase and gone to Heaven. Your sweet eyes and tempting lips all too pretty to be here in Camden. You scratched Cyril’s ears before answering, "Oh no Mr. Solomons, I'm fine. Cyril here is very very sweet."
"Now treacle, I think I'm at a disadvantage. Don't like that at all me. Now how is it yeah, that you know my name and now my dog's name... but I don't get to know your name sweetness?"
With a quirked brow you answer, "Oh Mr. Solomons, everyone knows your name. The ferocious King of Camden, and his demon dog. Lots of tales about you Mr. Solomons.”
Alfie allowed himself a smile at your cheek, “Lots of stories eh? Which one is your favorite?”
“The one where you bested the devil himself in a game of chess and won the keys to hell.”
Alfie made himself comfortable next to you on the bench, making sure that his thigh touched yours, “Is that so? Your mum tell you that little one?”
You shook your head, “No sir. She told me I wasn’t to go near you.”
“And yet here you are, talking to bad men. Tsk tsk tsk. Naughty ain’t you?”
“It’s fun to be naughty sometimes. Don’t you agree Mr. Solomons?”
Alfie couldn’t help but bring his shiny rings to your cheek, taking stock of your face. You never flinched away, keeping fiery eyes locked on his. He hummed a tune you didn’t know, and stated, “There’s an opera tonight at 8. You’ll come with me. Wear something nice.”
“I don’t go to operas with strange men.”
“I don’t go to operas with strange women. Yet here we are sweet. I thought you liked being naughty.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at his brazenness. In truth, you couldn’t believe you allowed yourself to get this far. But it was too delicious to let go now. “You’ll pick me up on the corner of 10th and Victoria? At 6pm.”
“Now what will I do with you for two hours before the play treacle?”
You shrugged, “Show me how the King of Camden has a good night.”
Alfie laughed heartily, “Fuck me you really are a bad little thing aren’t you. Alright sweetness, I’ll pick you up there at 6. And let’s see what we can get up to.”
#alfie solomons#alfie solomons x reader#alfie solomons x you#alfie solomons fanfic#alfie solomons x y/n#peaky blinders#peaky blinder fanfic
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A Fond Farewell
With Rooster Teeth beginning its draw down, an era has truly passed. The company has lasted more than two decades. 18 (soon 19) seasons, five mini-series, and cameos and references in Halo itself for Red vs Blue. 9 volumes alongside two movies, a chibi series, Ice Queendom, and its own games for RWBY. And so much more beyond that, RT Shorts, podcasts, Achievement Hunter, The Slow Mo Guys, and on and on. That’s a lot, especially for a little startup launching off a web series. I was listening to “This Isn’t Goodbye, It’s See You Later” by Richie Branson while I was making this little memorial post. It’s a song made for another Rooster Teeth show, Camp Camp, and I have to say it’s some very appropriate music for this moment.
The day the news dropped, I wrote up a little comment in response to Rooster Teeth beginning its closing down, and I thought I’d share some of it here. I grew up with Rooster Teeth, a bit of a cheesy line I know, but it’s true for a lot of us. I was just a little kid way back in the early 2000’s, a kid that liked Halo (a game I didn’t even own for a long time, but played at a friend’s house), and was just getting curious about what I could find about it on YouTube. And that brought me into the world of music videos and skits and montages made for that little game I liked.
From there, I discovered a small web series called Red vs. Blue. I’d sneak onto my folk’s computer to watch it since they didn’t appreciate the language, and in doing so I dipped my toes into the wide world of the internet for the first time. As I got older, I eventually hopped onto Reddit for its discussion threads of Rooster Teeth’s latest show, RWBY. I began my first in-depth fandom interactions, speculating about the show, enjoying the flood of fanart, even got into fanfics about RWBY (those fics have had their own amazing evolution alongside the show) and to this day it’s the fandom I’ve followed and bookmarked the most fics from. All the while I was making friends and bonding with people through the community this company and its shows have created.
Watching the shows and people grow over time was, looking back on it, just like watching myself grow. I was never really a social media/internet kind of guy, until it came to Rooster Teeth. The shows, shorts, podcasts, it all opened up a whole new world for me. It’s sad to see it coming to a close, and I hope it gets picked up in the future. But I’m happy, too, that it’s left so much behind, and had such an impact on me. It’s left me with so many good memories. Rooster Teeth, its shows, those that created and worked on it, and above all the community around it will always have a special place in my heart.
So, I bid a fond farewell to Rooster Teeth and its crew, and anyone who may drift away from the fandom in time. I wish you all the best.
#rwby#red vs blue#rooster teeth#rvb#jaune arc#weiss schnee#ruby rose#yang xiao long#blake belladonna#lie ren#nora valkyrie#memorial post#save rwby#crwby#greenlight volume 10#rwby white knight#white knight#rwby whiteknight#jaune x weiss#jaune arc x weiss schnee#rwby bumblebee#yang x blake#pyrrha nikos#cinder fall#james ironwood#arthur watts#fandom#thank you
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Missing Jikook today
Not that I don't miss them every single day, but just saying...
youtube
@wonsummernight Miss your edits!!!!!! I know there isn't any new Jikook content just yet, but if there was a time we were in dire need for some heart wrenching Jikook edits, this is it!!!
Basically, this is me telling you "PLEASE COME BACK". 💜💜
So, I came today to cry a little, you know commiserating together with others takes the edge off a bit (note to self: keep telling yourself that, and you might start believing it too...), but also to remind y'all that SM is crap, a viper pit, a cec pool, where all the miserably unhappy ignorant assholes tend to flock to (this is about the assholes that have turned sm into such a place), either to create drama that will get them some much needed attention they aren't getting elsewhere, or to create a parallel universe where their dreams and wants come true, even if they have zero standing in reality. Oh, and I forgot those that are there to make some hard cash, by all means.
And why am I mentioning all of this, you may ask?
Well, because for some reason my hopes and dreams for a fandom cleanse are being shattered as we speak.
As you may already know, I've taken a step back lately. mainly distancing myself from SM, as it's been going downhill for ages now, but has become an even uglier place to visit in the past few months, I'd say ever since it's been known that JK and JM are enlisting TOGETHER and will be serving TOGETHER, basically being in each other's close vicinity 24/7 for 18 months (even if not sharing exact same duties within the unit) and spending off time together . And to clarify once again: Same unit, same posting (base), different duties within the unit.
You'd think that 3 months in, and after the initial shock, reality and truth would set in (even with the most delusional) that these two young men CHOSE to enlist together (free choice and steps taken by both of them to achieve this). And once again me reminding they are the only ones in the group to decide they want to do this and the only idols to ever do so.
But no. Who am I kidding? Probably wishful thinking on my part. You know, that these people will either wake up, smell the roses and just cope with reality, or plain and simply piss off (that's probably me being delusional at this point).
Point being, it's gotten even worse. Like who would have believed that would happen? Yeah, probably should have seen it coming though. When you have cult behavior, when you have those that profit off it (monetarily or otherwise), I should have known it would go this way. The need to dive even deeper into the filth of this earth, to create even dumber narratives, to, of course, spew even more hate towards either of them (depending what delusional team you are on).
Should have seen it all coming.
Sadly, instead of just leaving, tail between their legs, they are doubling down on their utterly delusional beliefs regarding these young men. Not without pain, I may add. Pain, that a small part of me, someone that tries very hard to be nice and good and positive, is now relishing (I lie... not that mall of a part after all). Their twists and turns, their made up shit to compensate for whatever shit JK, JM or Tae are throwing their way... kind of priceless. I mean, if they aren't going anywhere, should we not at least enjoy their demise?
Does that make me a bad person?
Honestly, I don't think so.
And Jikook being away from most of this, lighting the fire and walking away leaving their haters behind to burn, was a nice touch.
Now we just sit here silently wait for our little travel show...
💜💜
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hey 👋
i think this is the longest i've been gone. i missed you all a lot. i've been writing this entire time, and wanted to finish the last (for now, it’s definitely not completed) two chapters of the ralak series before officially coming back. i didn't want to come back without some sort of peace offering (lol how could i come back empty handed?) and i don’t want to leave you guys hanging again, gotta give some sort of closure to this series!
i'm almost finished, but i felt like i needed to come on here and explain myself.
i've been really struggling with my mental lately. it's just been pretty bad, to be frank. and when i get like this, i find it extremely difficult to juggle all that life entails, and will typically neglect certain aspects of it just to get by. unfortunately, this, and my social life, have taken the biggest hit. i find it hard to keep in touch regularly with friends, and i end up just retreating into my shell. motivation becomes little, or nothing at all.
i don't want to go into too much detail, but i've found myself between a rock and a hard place. i don't feel like i have many options in my current situation. i feel trapped. i suppose i've felt this way for the past few years, but it's just been pretty bad recently. issy has been an escape for me. i created a ‘new’ identity, one that i could unapologetically be myself. no face to the name type of thing. i fell in love with pandora, yearning to go there. and suddenly, my ideal world--my ideal everything was at my fingertips.
when i first started, the feeling of regaining my identity after so many years was exhilarating. i put many, many things on the back burner to immerse myself into this feeling and this world. quicker meals, shorter showers, later bedtimes. i did any and everything to dedicate as much time as i could muster up to hold onto this new identity. i could feel myself becoming happier, slipping back into who i was before i lost her.
but life just happens. you know? it continued, and it did so ten-fold. it was one thing after the next, and soon my plate was so full that i had to take something off of it. i guess i'm used to choosing myself to neglect first, so i told myself i'd put this off until i could get through this and then come back. so i did, and i came back. then life happened again. so i left, and came back.
but this time around life hit me hard. i felt like i was playing a game on the hardest difficulty, with a half a life, no pauses, and no way to exit safely. i'm still playing that game, but i've realised that i should really try to make the most of it. so i've been writing in what time i have. it's been one of my biggest escapes and it makes me happy that i can share it, and see that others enjoy what my silly brain comes up with.
i'm ready to come back, but i'm honestly still really overwhelmed with life. i really, really don't want to disappoint anyone…and i can't promise that i won't leave again anytime soon. i never want to leave. and honestly, i don't think i'll ever really leave for good. i will forever love avatar, and all that it’s done for me for the past 14 years. i guess i’m just trying to say… thank you all for your patience and love.
okidoki, let me stop here while i can lol.
ill be posting the chapters as soon as i'm done with them, ofc. i love you guys!! i’m heading to bed and will try to clear out my inbox and dm’s asap
-issy 💜
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I just made myself a cup of a new tea, one from a set that a friend sent me. I was super curious to try it with and without milk in it, so after I take a sip without, I'm going to add milk to my tea.
That may seem like such an inane little story to post on a blog, unless you have an eating disorder. I'm sure many of you know what a big deal milk in tea can be, and what an important act of self-love it is.
It was poured into many of our ears, approaching teenhood in the mid-2000's, not to "drink our calories." For those of us whose restriction was weight-based, many of us practiced filling ourselves with water, with our coffee black and unsweetened whether that was how we liked it or not, and with tea that never contained milk.
Like many people who've struggled with binge eating and with restriction, I struggle with creating anxiety-inducing rules about when is okay to eat, especially if I'm between meals and worrying if I should allow myself a snack, or if it's okay to quench my thirst with anything other than water. This is especially true between meals. For some reason my brain has accepted the "extra" caloric intake as part of a meal, but still balks at the idea of introducing these things independently into non-meal parts of the day. I would like to note that my chronic illness and my body's reaction to food has also influenced this weird relationship between me and my favorite treats, such as a piece of candy, or a beverage that might happen to contain a greater-than-zero calorie count.
But tonight, before bed, I want to try this tea. And it sounds like one that'd be super tasty with milk, as it has cocoa powder and vanilla in the blend. So I let my tea cool in the room with me as I type this, telling myself that I can get up and go back for milk after I taste it.
Now I have gone to the kitchen.
Now I have poured in a splash of milk and tasted. It's soy milk, as regular milk sometimes hurts my stomach and I don't want my sleep to be disrupted. Due to my chronic illness, this is still something I have to think about, and I'll be honest, I hate it. Things like this make it so hard to tell myself I can let go of my food fears, because my brain knows that some of my food fears will turn out to have validity, and so what if they all do?
Now I have poured in another splash. Tasted.
Now I have poured in a third, much larger splash. Tasted.
Oh, this is it. This tea tastes like a warm dessert. But now it's too cool, so I need to microwave it back to its best heat. I used to not want to microwave my food. As a teen I heard a hippie say that microwaves destroy the nutrients in your food because the radiation breaks down their molecular structure. This is absolutely false. In fact, it's been disproven that microwaves break down nutrients any more than other methods of heating food, but for a long time I believed it. And even after I learned the truth, I still found it hard to convince myself it was okay to use microwaves for a very long time.
I have just finished my tea in my room. I took the time to identify that I wanted it. I took the time to truly taste it in several different ways, consider how I felt I wanted it and bring it to those specifications. It wasn't planned for any specific time or day, but I agreed to give myself this the way I wanted it anyway. I've been drinking my coffee with milk every morning, too. I actually like black coffee, but I like it better with milk. And I give myself things throughout the day that I enjoy, to enhance my experience of my existence. Life is hard, and it's okay to allow yourself, to the fullest extent you can, the small joys that bring you through the day.
I wanted to share this with you. I hope you don't feel the crushing weight of morality when staring at a bottle of regular soda and the sugar-free, when you wake up with your morning coffee, when your self-care regimen includes a cup of tea. I hope you practice actively giving yourself the love you need this week. And I hope you give it to yourself exactly the way you need it.
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senku x f!reader. reader has a background in agriculture. reader is referred to as princess in jest and the unpacking of the reason it upsets reader follows. reader and senku are both 25. post canon au where he and the other ishigami village settlers find a small settlement in california. robert is an oc created specifically for the au. wc 1.7k
divider thanks to @/cafekitsune as always
“You and Gen have a lot in common.”
Snorting at Senku’s words, you dab at the droplets of sweat on your hairline with the back of your gloved hand. He hasn’t been superbly helpful weeding the carrot patch but at least he has been decent company, the two of you working in parallel worlds and occasionally exchanging remarks about what you’re doing. This is generally how things just go when you’re together.
You won’t go so far as to say that you enjoy him, you barely know the man who stepped foot on shores not far from where you are now a little over a month ago, but it’s pleasant to have someone around who will listen to you ramble about whatever has been on your mind. You don’t judge him and he has never judged you, a silent mutual understanding that people will be people, the thread that ties the two of you together.
It doesn’t mean he isn’t observant, though, and he’s all too apt to share said observations with you.
“Why do you say that? Is it because we are both charming, hilarious, and beautiful?”
Senku chuckles while you wipe your free hand on your pants. Very glamorous, you think and laugh to yourself quietly. The sun hangs high enough in the sky you know it’s midday and you offer small waves to everyone who passes by you, smiling big enough people can see it even from a few feet away. You don’t have to do this but you go out of your way to do it, something that always strikes Senku as funny.
“Humble, too.” The scientist remarks and you look up at him, noticing he’s jotting notes away in a leatherbound notebook he swiped from the medical barn.
He has a makeshift ink pen, an invention of his own making, and he’s jotting down thoughts of how to improve the settlement. Watch towers, another well, perhaps mechanized farming equipment to keep you from having to do as much heavy lifting as you do.
“So you agree?” He chuckles again at your words and keeps scribbling, raising his brows. “You know I don’t point out the obvious, princess.”
The recent nickname makes you scoff but your cheeks warm. He heard the village doctor and navigator, two of your closest friends, call you the name in jest and he couldn’t possibly let it go considering what an apt descriptor it is.
“Don’t call me that, it’s bad enough that they do.” Sighing, you reposition your sunhat before leaning down to dig up another weed. “There’s nothing princess-y about me.”
Tossing a carrot down, you decide to rest a moment and sit down next to him in the yellowing grass. The weather is still moderate and pleasant but six weeks from now, it’s likely a small blanket of snow and frost will cover the world and your plants in the process so time is of the essence with the less hearty members of the settlement garden. You feel Senku looking at you but don’t entertain him by glancing back, situating yourself and stretching your legs out in front of you.
“No?” Senku shoots back and you groan, laying back in the grass and closing your eyes. He looks over you and shakes his head, placing the notebook on his thighs where his legs are crossed. “Let’s be honest with ourselves here. If this were thousands of years ago, you’d be in a big tower in a pretty dress waiting for some muscle-brained knight to come and slay a dragon for you.”
You want to be offended but you’re instead curious about what exactly makes him feel that way and how it relates to you and Gen at all.
“What do you mean? I can take care of myself and have managed to do it pretty well so far.”
Senku shakes his head. He can tell you aren’t offended thanks to the lightness in your tone and he appreciates that you don’t read between the lines considering there are none when he comes to him. He says what he means and you listen to it appreciatively.
“I’m not saying you can’t, I’m saying you inspire that kind of action in people.” He shrugs. “Think about the stories I know you used to read. A princess never has to ask for devotion, she simply gets it.”
Raising a brow, he meets your eyes and glances further out in the distance where one of the villagers he brought with him, Ginro, slumps in the fields while pulling weeds. The blonde man keeps glancing in your direction and waving before tilting his face downward to make sure you notice that he’s doing what you asked him to.
“I’ve never seen Ginro work so hard,” the scientist sniffs and you laugh louder than intended, bringing your hand to cover your mouth to stifle the noise.
“Not very fair of you to start with the easy target, Ishigami.”
He snickers and looks across the settlement, seeing if he can spot any of the others he has brought with him that have been more than happy to assist with anything you ask them to. You flash a smile, flutter your lashes if you have to, and shit seems to get done. It’s how you did things before you were petrified too.
“I overheard Hyoga arguing with Robert about being the one to escort you on the next foraging expedition.”
Thinking about the white haired man you feel a little uncertain of yourself and you look away. You find him extremely handsome despite his evasive nature and the two of you have only had a handful of conversations but he’s surprisingly helpful when necessary, you simply go out of your way trying to avoid asking for his help because he makes you nervous. Robert, on the other hand, is an issue that has followed you even thousands of years into the future (pro tip: don’t get petrified and then depetrified near a man harassing you in a club) but he insists on being your personal security whenever he can.
You make a note to genuinely contemplate trying your luck by asking Hyoga personally to accompany you but for now, you turn your attention back to your spiky haired companion.
“No you didn’t. Besides, we haven’t even planned a trip before winter even though we need to make one.”
Senku purses his lips and continues to look around the lands surrounding him.
“When have I ever lied to you?”
Considering his question for a moment, you hum and tilt your head. He hasn’t lied to you but this specific instance feels like a stretch.
“So you heard Big Mouth Bobby mention me and now I’m a princess? Seems like that criteria is a little unfair.”
Senku shifts where he sits and stretches his legs out in front of him to match your position. You shade your eyes from the sun with your palm and look up at him to find he’s glancing over his shoulder at you, shaking his head.
“You seem to think I’m telling you that it’s a bad thing people like and want to be liked by you.”
Shrugging, you settle back against the grass and kick your feet gently. He watches your every move and you feel observed and viewed rather than enjoyed, something about him that always makes you squirm despite yourself.
“Maybe you’re right.”
Senku smiles.
“I’m always right.”
You laugh and shake your head, shutting your eyes to keep from being further intimidated by his weighted glance. If he has any other assessments he’s clearly going to keep them to himself so you press forward, sun warming your face while you speak.
“I don’t get how that relates to me and Gen being similar though. Is he a princess too?”
A chuckle from your companion. At least you can always make him laugh even if you know your other charms won’t work on him. Looks have no effect on Senku nor do fluttering lashes or cute, coy smiles - he judges people off of their character only and you admire the depth it takes for him to do so.
“Oh yeah, that.” He picks his notebook back up and begins scribbling again. “You’re both very persuasive and understand people better than they think.”
Giggling, you sigh contentedly and even Senku finds himself a little bit drawn to the sound. You are charming and sweet and funny and perhaps a bit too honest beneath the slightly self deprecating humor you use to keep people from knowing who you really are. Even Senku can acknowledge all of these things - they’re true, after all. Proven and quantifiable.
“Well, thank you. The power of people skills can never be underestimated in a world where half of the people you meet want to kill you and the other half probably want to kill themselves because we don’t have social media to numb their brains.”
Again with that too honest humor. The scientist shakes his head and scribbles down a doodle for the vision he has for the tower he’s going to build in the coming weeks, halfway between your fields and the little cabin you call home. It’s the perfect position to see the entire settlement and he assumes the only reason you don’t have one yet is that you’ve lacked the people to assist with making it.
He may not be a muscle-brained knight, saving you while you sit forlornly in a tower, but he can be the genius that builds the tower you’ll help create the future society all of you will someday live in from. It’s a far more noble cause if you ask him.
“Keep it up.” He adds simply and you shield your eyes from the sun again, opening them to meet his. You offer a thumbs up and a grin and he shakes his head.
“I am going to tell Gen you called him a princess, though.”
Senku scoffs and leans back, still glancing down at you.
“Well then you’d be lying and it isn’t good to lie, now is it?”
You sit up, ready to argue back and forth but you’re interrupted by Ginro calling your name from a distance and approaching you, three carrots in his fist. Senku rises to standing and reassuringly pats your shoulder with the hand not holding his notebook.
“Looks like your savior is on his way, princess.”
You sigh, shaking your head and waving the scientist goodbye when he parts, watching him leave before plastering on your best persuasive smile and greeting Ginro exuberantly.
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ATEEZ REACTIONS TO YOUR FRIEND ABANDONING YOU AFTER THEY FIND AN S/O | ot8 x reader
GENRE | reaction, headcanons, angst, fluff
WARNINGS | Kinda sad. Mentions of bad friends. Mentions of friends abandoning you and acting like you don’t exist anymore. Self-indulgent. Lmk if I missed something.
NOTES | Just a little something bc I’m kinda sad and angry lol. These are based on a situation I found myself in recently, and this is how I’m coping ig lol.
Hongjoong
☆ Hongjoong is furious, but he reigns in his anger and instead, focuses on being there for you. That doesn’t mean that he will not express his frustration at your so-called “friend, though. He will definitely tell you what your friend did is wrong and that you deserve to be treated better.
☆ Hongjoong says things you want to hear in such a situation and validates your feelings of hurt, anger, and confusion. But, he also says things that you need to hear, telling you things like, “Don’t let other people’s actions define your self-worth. You are an amazing person, and you should not let someone like that make you feel like you were a bad friend.”
☆ If you want to, he will help you write a diss track so that you can channel your frustration and anger into something that will allow you not to feel sorry for yourself.
☆ By the end of this little collaboration, as you watch Hongjoong's proud smile from where he's seated in front of the studio equipment on the other side of the window, you will definitely feel a teensy bit better.
☆ If he has a personal SNS account (and if your “friend” follows him in said account), he'll post a bunch of pictures of you both enjoying convenience store snacks and of you laughing with a passive-aggressive caption. Something like, “Some friendships are like a bag of chips in the aisle of a convenience store—they're there one moment and gone the next. But our friendship is a timeless classic, always on the shelf, waiting to be enjoyed, and never going out of style.”
Seonghwa
☆ Seonghwa is going to be angry, too, but he prioritises your well-being and emotions above all else.
☆ So, as much as he wants to have a word with your “friend”, he lets it go in favour of hugging you as you cry out the feelings of hurt, anger, and betrayal that have been building inside of you. Seonghwa rocks you back and forth in his arms, gently patting your back and handing you tissues when needed. He even makes sure to have a bottle of water nearby and prompts you to drink some from time to time so you don't get dehydrated.
☆ When you’re done crying, he wraps you in his softest blankets with a mischievous grin and brings out snacks before turning on the TV and watching sappy movies with you.
☆ If you’re not in the mood to watch movies, expect him to bring out a new Lego set for both of you to build together, seizing the opportunity to create a relaxing atmosphere so you’re distracted from your pain.
☆ While the two of you work on building the set, he makes funny sounds with a character he has finished and acts all goofy, especially when you become too silent or daze off. Sometimes, he smiles at you sweetly, gently encouraging you and reminding you that he is there for you, no matter what.
Yunho
☆ When Yunho learns that your friend has basically abandoned you, his protective instincts kick in. He is positively murderous, and he is very vocal about how he feels about your friend acting like a jerk.
☆ “How dare that idiot act like this?!” His words might be coloured with anger, but he really wants you to know that he stands firmly by your side and that he won't tolerate anyone mistreating you.
☆ He will drive you around the city because he knows how much a change of scenery can help and also because you love driving with no particular destination in mind. Yunho plays soothing music at first, slowly changing the mood of the songs until both of you are basically screaming the lyrics to Guerrilla as you drive past the city streets.
☆ If by any chance you happen to cross paths with your friend while you are out with Yunho, he does everything in his power to gently guide you away (ideally, you don't even notice said “friend” as Yunho jokes around, gently guiding you to his car while blocking your view of them).
☆ If he’s alone, though, he definitely confronts your friend. He uses his intimidating presence to subtly tell them that he doesn’t approve of what they did, “If I ever see you near y/n, I'll make sure you never have your kneecaps.” His words hang heavy in the air as he walks away, a stark reminder that he is willing to go to great lengths to protect you from any harm.
Yeosang
☆ Yeosang will be there for you, but silently. He gives you time and space to process your feelings, but he is there as a quiet yet reassuring presence because he won't leave you on your own when you need someone to be there. But he also waits for you to go to him and talk when you are ready.
☆ Though Yeosang doesn't push you to share your feelings, his presence gives you the comfort you need. Him just bring there serves as a reminder that you don’t need to face this painful situation on your own.
☆ His care for you manifests in subtle ways: snack delivery, random funny text messages, or him telling you something ridiculous the other members did. But the most noticeable thing is that he is around a lot more.
☆ He makes sure that you know he’s available for hanging out or just talking. He will mention it in passing that he’s free lately and use his busy schedule in the past few months as an excuse to see you. He arrives at your door, smiling widely, “I was free, and I haven't seen you in a while because of the tour. So, I wanna hang out. Let's get fried chicken?” (And how can you say no when he asks so nicely?)
San
☆ San is also very livid at how your friend treated you and is one of the members to let you know his take on the matter. His first reaction is to confront your friend directly. You will have to stop him from calling the friend or marching up to their house to give them a piece of his mind. You can feel his simmering anger as you tell him to let it be, but he agrees with your wishes (reluctantly).
☆ When it comes to comforting you, he provides you all the emotional support you need, letting you cry in his arms. But he also says cheesy things like, “Why are you crying over someone who doesn't know the difference between a gem and a lump of coal?” His attempt at being funny elicits a weak smile from you, causing him to smile as well.
☆ San is also someone to take you out on a surprise outing to stargaze, especially if he knows that a meteor shower is supposed to take place. As you both are laid out on the blanket, watching the stars, he softly reminds you of your worth. “You know, you shouldn’t waste tears on meteors that pass through your life when you have a bunch of stars in your galaxy.”
Mingi
☆ Mingi is sad when he learns about how your friend had treated you, and he is genuinely concerned despite his awkward attempts to comfort you.
☆ He pats your head or your shoulder as you cry, but at the same time, says something deep like, “I know you have a kind heart and that this situation has hurt you, but some people don’t deserve the love you carry within you.”
☆ Instead of assuming, he directly asks you what you need and how he can help, and he does it with no questions asked. Even if that means he has to pay unreasonable shipping to get you your favourite chocolates as soon as possible.
☆ He also orders takeout so that he knows that you’re eating properly and then puts on an old comedy show he knows you have watched countless times. By the time the sun sets, the weight on your shoulders lifts and you find yourself quoting the show line-for-line with Mingi while laughing into the night.
Wooyoung
☆ Wooyoung goes attack-mode but also protect-mode because he’s not one to let anyone mistreat someone he cares about.
☆ In attack mode, he calls your friend and tells them exactly what he thinks of them. He won't hold back, and says something like, “Don't mess with me. Because I can and will make your life hell, and I'm not scared of people like you who think it’s okay to treat people badly, especially if they have treated you with nothing but kindness.” His words, though playfully exaggerated, are stern enough to deliver the warning to your friend.
☆ Then, because he knows how much you are hurting, he does everything to comfort you. He cooks your favourite meal, knowing the recipe like the back of his hand. While cooking, he cracks jokes, hoping to get you to smile.
☆ With the meal prepared and the table set, Wooyoung opens a bottle of soju, and lets you get tipsy enough to relax. He listens as you say not-so-nice things about your friend, allowing you to vent without judgment. And if you are feeling up to it, he might put on some music and dance goofily, smiling when you laugh and encouraging you to join him.
Jongho
☆ Jongho, like Yeosang, is a silent supporter. He gives you the space you need to process your emotions but also lets you know that he is there. “I’m here whenever you want to talk or if you need anything.”
☆ He will be the pillar when you need him to be. Jongho lets you curl up next to him even though he’s not very fond of skinship and eventually starts humming under his breath, and when he notices you relaxing, sings gentle melodies to lull you to sleep. He smiles to himself when he feels the way you relax against him, forgetting the hurt, even if for a little while.
☆ To alleviate some of the pain and anger that you are feeling, he makes witty jokes and humorous comments to lighten the mood. In a moment of lightheartedness, Jongho might playfully break an apple in two pieces and hold it up for you to see, saying, “Hey, isn't this,” and show you the two pieces of the apple, “that idiot who let go of one of the most amazing friends he could ever get?”
#outlaw/atz reactions#ateez x reader#hongjoong x reader#seonghwa x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader#cromernet#ateez imagines#ateez scenarios#ateez smau#ateez social media au#ateez fake texts#ateez fanfic
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Miracle-three
(gif created by me, the fallen nightmare. feel free to use, simply give credit)
Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader
Warnings/Tropes: forced proximity, slight enemies to lovers, slow burn, smut, angst, fluff, mentions of death, and swearing.
Summary: Reader is the merch girl for Bad Omens. It wasn't what she wanted to do with her life but when her mother got sick with Alzheimer's, reader took a job where she could to help with the costs. She thought it would be a one-time gig but the longer she was on the road with them, the harder she fell for Noah Sebastian; even if he wanted nothing to do with her. She needed a miracle to save her mom and her future.
Author Note: I forgot how much I hate slow burns. So we'll see how long it lasts. Tags are open if anyone is interested!
Tags: @ada-clarence @nonamessblog @thescarlettvvitch @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @theoneandonlykymberlee @yumikitten @blackveilomens @cherrymedicine13
A yawn fell from my lips as I snuggled deeper into the bed, a blanket wrapped around me like a cacoon to keep in the warmth. It was my first day off in four days and with the constant traveling; I was relishing being able to sleep in an actual bed. The bunks on the tour bus weren't terrible but with Bryan's snoring I was thankful for the quiet night of sleep ahead. The sun was setting, the orange glow painting over the walls of the room, and I only left the bed to go to the bathroom or grab my room service. The entire day was dreading tomorrow because that's when I had to send Lana her first paycheck and I was about three hundred dollars short.
My mom had been doing great, even remembering who I was when we talked on the phone. Something about hearing my voice but not seeing my face must have helped. It warmed my heart that we had conversations about things like we used too before she got sick.
I could explain to Lana the situation. I'm sure she would understand.
Somehow I doubted that which is why I was heavily researching my idea, wondering what the risks were and if the payout was worth it. Everyone online who had a page said they could pay for things they wouldn't have with a regular job. I would have my own rules and wouldn't worry about sharing it with a partner. I could post what I wanted whenever I wanted. The only risky thing would be someone recognizing me and with who I worked for, I wasn't completely sold on the idea yet.
"I don't have to show my face," I told myself as I sat up, deciding pretty hastily.
Desperation made people do drastic things and starting an Only Fans was my last resort; I had no other options.
The phone on my camera wouldn't do and I sucked in my bottom lip, wondering if what I was about to do was a good idea. I needed a better camera and set up while also having a credit card with a high enough limit, though it was for emergencies.
Isn't this one? Think of it as an investment.
Agreeing with the voice in my mind, I scrambled out of bed and quickly stepped into a pair of black sweats and hoodie to match. I cringed when I noticed myself in the mirror and made quick work to make myself look somewhat presentable.
The walk to the nearest store was only a few minutes, and I enjoyed the sounds of the hustle bustle of the city as people walked passed me, their own ideas for the night fueling them. I knew little about cameras and thought about asking Bryan some advice but knowing I might have to tell him why I needed one didn't sit well with me
As I was leaving the store, two bags in hand and $500 more in debt, I felt my phone buzz in my pocket and when I read the message, I couldn't help but let out a groan.
Davis, yet again, was inviting me out to dinner tonight with him and the crew. I ignored his first two because I really had plans to lie in bed all day. Now, the only thing I wanted to do was get my profile set up and start posting so I could make money as soon as I could. Plus, Noah was avoiding me ever since the night of the first show when Jolly caught us together. Nothing happened but to Noah, it was as if they caught us fucking.
The thought caused a flush to creep to my cheeks as another text came in.
Davis: If money is an issue, it's on the crew tonight. The last few days have been crazy and we want a night out to relax.
It was true; every show this tour is sold out which made for a crazy night. Everyone in the band and crew were exhausted so a night out was something we all needed.
Me: I'm already out, where should I meet you guys?
Davis: there's this Mexican restaurant right around the block from the hotel. Meet in an hour?
Perfect amount of time to set up and record my first video. I never was a modest person, even if I never had a boyfriend. A few hookups here and there gave me some experience, but I also knew what my body liked, hence me bringing a few differnt kinds of toys with me. After the first tour, I realized how lonely I got out on the road.
I refused to prove Noah right I was only here to fuck someone; which was not true. But that didn't mean I couldn't think of a certain tattooed vocalist while I filmed, right?
An hour and fifteen minutes and red flushed cheeks later, I was practically running out of the hotel to make it in time to the restaurant. As usual, I was running late, but that was because it took me some time to figure out how to edit and post the video to my page. What I filmed wasn't exactly raunchy but just enough to keep people wanting to come back.
I was in a rush to get to the restaurant that I nearly missed the body that I collided in. Strong arms wrap around me to keep me steady as I looked up into those dark eyes that haunted me every second of every day. My heart fell deep into the pits of my stomach as embarrassment filled my veins, knowing that face was the reason for my orgasm less than an hour ago.
Noah gave me a look as slowly removed his arms from me, Jolly and Folio standing on either side of him.
"Where's the fire, angel?" He asked while drinking in the sight of me with a wide grin.
In my pussy.
He was wearing a grey sweater; the hood pulled up over his head and white hat. I cursed my vagina as it throbbed at the sight of him and my pet name.
"Uh, I was meeting Davis and others for dinner," I pointed behind me, stuttering over my words a bit.
Jolly smiled. "We're headed there too. Care if we walk with you?"
Him and Folio, not at all. Noah, yes I minded.
I didn't appreciate him acting different around me when we were alone as opposed to when people were around us.
"Nope," I smiled.
The four of us walked quietly to the restaurant with Folio next to me, Jolly and Noah behind us. Folio bumped his shoulder with me which made me peer up at him.
"I feel like I haven't seen you in a while. Outside of work," he said.
I gave a half shrug. "Just been keeping to myself the last few days."
"Does that have anything to do with," Folio threw a thumb over his shoulder towards Noah.
"No," I said a little too quickly, afraid as if he could see in my mind what I had been doing back in my room. "I forgot how busy life on the road is, that's all."
"What did he do to make you avoid him?" he asked, seeing right through my lie.
This caused Noah to step closer to the two of us, forcing his way between Folio and I.
"I didn't do anything," Noah defended.
My body was still buzzing post orgasm so having him this close to made my stomach flutter and head hazy.
"Right," I muttered under my breath and gave myself some space from him, allowing Jolly to take my spot next to Noah.
"Did we do anything to put you off?" Jolly asked.
I shook my head. "No, not at all. Everyone has been nice. I meant what I said, I've just been tired."
Noah peered over at me past Jolly, something unreadable on his face, but said nothing while we turned the block, the restaurant coming into view. Davis, Byran, Matt, and Nick Ruffilo were already seated at a table outside as we walked up. My phone buzzed in my pocket and as I saw yet another notification from Only Fans, I didn't realize that the only open seat was next to Noah.
Cursing under my breath, I sat tentatively next to him and pocketed my phone, not wanting him to peak over my shoulder and see the notification.
I had a few new subscribers which meant people were paying for my content. Maybe soon things will start picking up and I wouldn't have to worry as much.
The server came over to take our order and I frowned at Matt as he ordered a pitcher of beer for all of us to share.
"Can I have a water and four chicken tacos please?" I asked with a smile.
"You don't want a beer?" Matt asked.
I shook my head. "I don't drink; well much anyway. I do for special occasions but not really feeling like it right now."
Noah muttered something under his breath, and my eyes snapped over to him.
"Care to share what you mumbling under your breath?"
"You seemed pretty into it last tour in Chicago," he didn't bother to look away from his phone.
I stared at him with my jaw slack, upset for him bringing up that night but also amazed that he remembered that. With the way his jaw ticked and his hand gripped around his phone, it was clear he thought of that night often. I got drunk after a show because the guy I'd been talking to all night and flirting with was actually married. His wife was the reason why he was at the show in the first place but decided to hang out at the merch booth instead.
"Is that why you're such a dick to me?" I wondered.
Thankfully, the server had left, so they didn't have to watch us bicker but for the rest of the guys at the table, it didn't save them.
"You guys get drunk all the time. The one night I did, you hold it against me? For what?" I snapped.
I wasn't yelling but the table next to us spared us a few glances of concern.
"We don't need someone to carry us from the venue to the hotel, three blocks," Noah finally met my gaze.
I scoffed, completely baffled this was why he was such an asshole towards me. Because I got drunk last tour and he had to carry me back to the hotel?
"You're fucking unbelievable, Noah." I shook my head and turned away from him.
If I wasn't starving, I would head back to the hotel. But I already ordered and didn't want my food to go to waste.
Folio, who was sitting on my other side, looked at me with sympathetic eyes and gave my knee a squeeze underneath the table. The rest of dinner passed by with Noah and I not speaking another word to each other while the others chatted amongst themselves. I ate my food and sipped at my water in peace, checking my phone every now and then to see if Lana had texted me back. It was almost eight in the evening, and I debated on wondering if it was too late to call to talk to my mom when my phone rang.
Excusing myself from the table, I walked down the block to answer the call. It was a fast phone call, my mom being too exhausted to talk. Instead, I caught up with Lana.
"Alright, well let me know how she is in the morning. I'll be in the bus for half of the day so I can talk with her," I sighed.
"I will, dear. She's so exhausted from today. I looked through some photo albums with her to help her remember but nothing. There was nothing in her eyes."
I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded even though Lana couldn't see.
"Yeah, those vacant eyes. It's been happening a lot lately."
There was a lot of rustling on Lana's end before her soft voice came through. "I promise you. She's in good hands. When she remembers things, we have a lot in common."
That made me smile.
"Good. And I'll send you the first payment tomorrow," I said much to my dismay.
"No rush, dear."
We talked for a few more minutes before I hung up, suddenly exhausted and wanting nothing more than to crawl into bed for the rest of the night. When I returned to the table, I halted seeing that only Noah sat there. He heard me walk up and handed me my to go box of leftover food.
"The bill's been taking care of," he said.
I didn't meet his gaze, still upset with him, as I snatched the box out of his hand.
"Don't worry, I didn't flirt with anyone to get free food."
Noah sighed then pushed himself out of his chair, immediately towering over me.
"Do you always have to talk with such an attitude," he gritted out through clenched teeth.
I stood toe to toe with him. "Only for you, baby."
The pet name was supposed to come out as playful, no meaning behind it. But with the way Noah's eyes flashed and a low noise vibrated from his throat, I knew it had the opposite effect on him. His tongue rolled over his bottom lip and I wanted nothing more that to taste them.
"Can I walk you back to the hotel?" Noah asked.
Unbelievable.
"Oh, now that no one is around you act like you give a shit?" I snarled.
He raised his hands. "I'm trying to be nice, Y/N."
"Here's a piece of advice," I snatched my purse from the table, "If you want to be nice to me, stop doing it when we're alone. It makes me think you're embarrassed to be seen with me."
Noah's face fell and began shaking his head. "It's not that."
"Oh, right? It was because of that night in Chicago where you had to carry me back to the hotel. News flash, Noah. I didn't fucking ask you too. So do me a favor, unless it deals with work, don't talk to me the rest of the time were on tour."
Not bothering to listen to him come up with another excuse, I turned on my heels and stomped back towards the hotel.
#noah sebastian#noah sebastian and reader#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian reader insert#noah sebastian smut#forced proximity#enemies to lovers#slow burn
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there’s some things i really wanted to talk about especially regarding my account and tumblr as a whole, so i decided to finally make this post as a way to sort of vent out my feelings on some things.
i’m not gonna lie, tumblr has become a very different place from what it was. i started creating content 3 years ago and it’s gone through so many changes (much expected). however, i don’t think tumblr has really changed for the better, especially when it comes to content creators. this used to be a really safe space for me to come on and create works for fandoms that i enjoyed, but recently, that safe space hasn’t felt, well, safe anymore. there is constant discourse everywhere on this platform and i’ve found that many people here are just extremely bitter? it’s almost like it’s become a mean girl center and it makes it difficult to interact with others.
obviously, this doesn’t go for everyone. i’m not trying to come at people specifically or cause issues, but i have seen my fair share of problems with people on here and some of it is just completely ridiculous.
next, i’d like to discuss the elephant in the room and that’s the lack of interaction/support to writers. it is just mind blowing to me that we as creators have to BEG our followers to reblog or even send us asks. obviously, some people are new to tumblr and don’t understand it’s algorithm, but there are people on here who just simply chose not to reblog for some reason?? it’s not only discouraging, but it puts less confidence in writers and then we aren’t motivated to create content. i’ve said this before, but there is no reason why a 2k note fic should have only 100 or so reblogs. likes mean nothing on this platform. it’s not Twitter. i genuinely have gotten so tired of repeating myself that i don’t even say it anymore because i know it won’t be acknowledged.
i understand people have lives, i do too, but it isn’t hard to send an ask to a writer about literally anything. i think the last time i had an anon ask was weeks ago and i genuinely get disappointed when i ask for interactions just to receive nothing? no one is obligated to speak with me or send me asks by any means, but a little “hey! how are you?” goes a long way. i probably sound ridiculous, but it’s just how i feel about the matter.
another thing that bothers me is when a writer doesn’t write smut or suggestive content, they hardly get any interaction. i’ve seen it myself before and i’m not sure why people just ignore greatly written fics?? i understand that smut is the main appeal. trust me, i 100% get it, but fluff writers hardly get any attention and some of the best fics i’ve read weren’t even smut related. i’m not saying every person here has to read fluff or angst fics by any means, but it makes me sad that people write these fics to hardly get any interaction because it isn’t smut content. the least y’all can do is reblog it.
to discuss my account, i honestly don’t really feel the most happy here. i don’t have as much motivation as i used to and i have contemplated removing my account, but i have some great fics i’d rather not have be deleted. i might start a new account for a fresh start, but i’m still not 100% on it.
and if you read this till the end, thank you! i probably sound like a whiny baby but i just wanted to express some of my feelings because it’s been weighing on me a lot recently.
#summer rants#uhhh#yeah!#lowkey needed to speak on this#also emmie thank u for being motivation for this#!!!!
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Real Eyes, Fake Lies (Part One)
Pairing: soulmate!Lee Jihoon x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 3.1k
Warnings: Angst, Hanahaki AU, mentions of death, mentions of infidelity, reader cries, Seungcheol and Jeonghan being the cutest couple
Summary: What do you do when you find out the one person that was created by the universe to be yours doesn’t want you back?
A/N: Just a little warm up post to ease myself to getting back into writing. I’ve had this idea in my head for a few years now, and finally decided to get it up and running. Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoy it! - Taelor ☺️✨💜
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You believed in soulmates. It wasn’t something that could be debated on in your world - someone out there was literally chosen and designed to cohabitate in perfect harmony with you, and only you. To love and cherish for the rest of your lives. Once you come into physical contact with your soulmate, it’s said that all the dull black and whites you see explode into a beautiful display of more colours than you could ever think of, and everything you feel is intertwined with what your other half feels. You have spent all 21 years of your life dreaming about what that would feel and look like.
You’ve seen soulmates meet before your very eyes. You saw it when your older brother, Choi Seungcheol fell for Yoon Jeonghan, literally, in your first year of college. You saw it when Jeon Wonwoo, close friend of your brother, caught Kim Mingyu into his arms just weeks prior.
You saw how much your mother loved her soulmate, your father, before he decided to leave her for a woman half his age when you were only 11 years old, and your brother 13. You saw your mother’s true love for your father seal her fate, falling ill to the dreaded curse of your soulmate not loving you back - watching life leave her with every flower petal she coughed up until there was nothing left. You saw it in your best friend Kwon Soonyoung’s parents, who took both you and your brother in until you both were of age and left for college.
You definitely weren’t a stranger to the phenomenon of soulmates, but you sure as hell were a stranger to knowing the beauty of colours and feelings of another. It’s something you craved and wanted so desperately to feel, you never knew when you would get to experience it.
In a way, you wished your soulmate was your best friend. Soonyoung knew everything about you; how to push your buttons and how to make your worst days feel like the best. Why couldn’t he be the one made for you? You spent most of your days together, being in the same Theatre and Dance majors at your college as well as the Theatre Club. In a realistic way, you two made perfect sense. But alas, Soonyoung’s soulmate came in the form of Lee Seokmin, the third in your best friend trio. You know that most of the time you’re the third wheel in your group, but you’ve grown to accept that fate over the previous 2 years.
Not having a soulmate never stopped you from living your life as you had intended, though. Living with your brother and best friend, along with the additions of their soulmates in a large 4 bedroom house inherited to you and Seungcheol by your mother in the city of Seoul, conveniently only a short commute away from your university. It wasn’t bad, on the contrary, you loved the company of your closest people who you call your family. There were the days when you often missed your mother and longed for the love only a soulmate could give, but those days are rare to have for you. You were more than content in your little bubble of existence.
“Choi Y/N!” You groan at the excited tone of your older brother calling you from the kitchen.
“It’s 6am, Cheol.” You grumble, snuggling into your knitted hoodie wrapped around your body as you slump against the breakfast bar, taking a piece of fruit from the basket on the bar. “Why are you so chirpy?”
“Good morning to you too!” He chuckled, reaching over and fluffing your hair up as you whined. “Don’t you think this green shirt makes my eyes pop?”
Seungcheol and Jeonghan had devised the perfect plan; wear an obnoxiously bright coloured shirt with the goofiest patterns and shapes - and once you found your soulmate, they would easily know because you would be so horrified that you would have to tell them what your thoughts were on the colour clashes.
“Ah, yes,” You hum, waving your banana around in the air. “They make the grey’s in your eyes really stand out.” You huff in a monotone voice, resulting in a laugh from the top of the stairs.
“It’ll happen eventually, Bug.” Jeonghan smiles as he passes you, giving you a peck on the forehead. “And we’ll be the first to know.”
“Yeah, yeah.” You smile, waving the couple off. “I’ll see you guys when I get home tonight. Don’t worry about dinner, it’s Working Bee tonight. Our sets won’t paint themselves.” You pull your backpack over your shoulder, umbrella in hand as you walk to the front door. “I’ll be home at around 8?”
“Sounds good, Love Bug!” Seungcheol smiled - Love Bug being a loving nickname from your mother. “But call us if you’re going to be home any later. We’ll wait up.”
“Will do! Love you,” you sang as you closed the door behind you.
It’s late in the day when Lee Jihoon hums quietly to himself as he strolls through the hallway of the Music Building, tapping his fingers on his sides as he attempts to get the chord progression in his head correct. His eyes scan the bland black and white scenery in front of him, a blank expression matching the blank scenery.
“Hoonie!” A voice called, making Jihoon smile.
“Hey, you.” he hummed, pressing his lips to Kang Ji-ah’s temple, taking her into his arms.
He knows what you’re thinking. Why the hell would he be with a girl who wasn’t his soulmate? Well, why would he tell you? He doesn’t have to explain it to anyone, him and her are the only ones who know, anyway. It isn’t harming anyone. He didn’t even know if he believed in soulmates at this stage. And it’s not like anyone assumed any different. On the outside and to everyone else, Jihoon and Ji-ah were soulmates. They didn’t have to know it wasn’t real.
“I’ve got dinner with my parents tonight, Hoonie, but we can rain check our date until next week, right?” She smiled as Jihoon’s hands rested delicately around her waist.
“Of course, babe. I have to stay late for the Theatre Club anyway. Gotta get the orchestra prepared for rehearsals.” He lets her hands wrap around his shoulders as she pulls him in for a tight hug.
“Thank you, my love!” She cooed, giving him a final kiss on the cheek. “I’ll text you tonight, yeah?” She happily spun around and proceeded to go back from where she came, waving to Soonyoung and Seokmin coming towards Jihoon hand in hand.
“You two are sickeningly cute.” Soonyoung grimaces as Seokmin only grins.
“Oh stop it, Soonie. You know for a fact that Jihoon thinks the same about us.” He smiles as Jihoon only nods his head in agreement.
“Is there a reason you’re blessing me with your presence?” He raises his brow.
“Surprisingly, yes.” Soonyoung nodded quickly. “Jihoon-ah, you know you’re my best guy friend, right?”
“I am?”
“Don’t sound too shocked.” He pouted, making his soulmate giggle to himself. “I came to ask a favor of you.”
“Okay..?” Jihoon tilted his head.
“Are you able to walk Y/N back home tonight after the Bee? Min and I can’t make it and Cheol doesn’t want her walking home alone when the sun is just going down. I’ll shout some dinner for you next week to make up for it.”
“Oh, is that all?” He nods thoughtfully. Of course he knew you. You were Choi Y/N, top of your classes in Theatre. You were well known for your powerful vocals and bubbly personality. You were also a shoo-in for the lead role for Mamma Mia this year, and Soonyoung’s adopted sister. Your paths have crossed a few times, and Jihoon never had a problem with you; he even thought you were a cool girl. “Yeah that’s fine, it’s on the way home for me anyway.”
“Ah, you’re a lifesaver, Jihoon-ah! Thank you!” He grinned, clapping him on the back as he squeezed Seokmin’s hand. “Min and I have to go do a last rehearsal for my Hip-Hop final, but shoot me a text when you get home yeah?”
“Can do.” He nods, waving his hand as he makes his way to the campus band room to meet with the orchestra.
When Jihoon arrives at the auditorium two hours later, he’s surprised when he’s only met with you, covered in small splotches of paint, and a halfway finished set piece that is meant to look like the pavements of Greece. Your hair is disheveled and tied in a lopsided ponytail on top of your head and your glasses sitting on the tip of your nose with no one else in sight.
“What happened to the Bee?” Jihoon made his presence known to you, causing you to jump as his voice echoes across the empty stage, the only other sound being heard coming from your small Bluetooth speaker by your side.
“Ah, it’s just you, Oppa.” You smiled as you held your hand over your chest, calming down your wild heartbeat from the fright. “The guys all left about half an hour ago. They all had to study for auditions and all that.” You lean down as you speak, painting over the wooden set. “But it’s fine. I work better alone anyway.”
“Doesn’t mean you should.” He frowns, walking up onto the stage and setting himself down on the other side of the large set piece, a blank canvas on the other side. “Why didn’t you finish when the others did?”
“Cheol isn’t expecting me home until later, might as well fill in my time helping the team out.” You shrug, smiling to the confused man as he watches you paint. “I gotta say though, being only able to paint the black and white parts of the sets is boring as hell.”
You intrigued him. According to Soonyoung, you suffered through a fair bit as a child and yet you seem so content with your life as you hum and paint away. After a brief moment, he sighs and picks up a paintbrush, dipping it into the paint.
“Woah, woah, woah.” You try to stop him. “You don’t have to help, really. I know Soonie put you up to walking me home, you don’t have to do this too.” You smile softly to him, and he just looks back at you with an expression you can’t decipher.
“You said it yourself,” Jihoon mumbles, painting the wood in front of him. “Might as well help out.”
After thirty minutes of quiet but hard work of painting, you take a deep breath before lifting your head to the older boy who sat across from you, his long dark hair tucked delicately behind his ear as he worked.
“Oppa?” You ask quietly, only receiving a hum in return. “What’s seeing colour like?”
A beat of silence passes as Jihoon pauses his painting mid-stroke. “I wouldn’t know.”
“What?!” You drop the paintbrush on the newspaper covering the stage floor. “Ji-ah isn’t your soulmate?!”
“No?” He laughs incredulously, like it was the silliest question he had ever been asked. “I just like the girl, is all.”
“I can’t believe what I’m hearing!” You gasp. “Why are you even with her if she isn’t your soulmate?”
“It’s not like It’s a secret. No one ever asked, they just assumed. So I never told. Why does it bother you so much?” He frowns, feeling his cheeks grow warm.
“It doesn’t,” You counter, picking up the paintbrush again. “But.. like, aren’t you curious to meet the person literally made for you?”
“Made is a bit of a stretch.” He laughs, shrugging his shoulders. “I mean, it isn’t that big a deal. So we haven’t found our soulmates yet. We are just having fun with each other right now.”
“And what if you found your soulmate, what would you do then?” You ask cautiously, lifting your head and pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose once more.
“I don’t know?” He laughs again - a nervous tick of his. “They’d just have to accept that I really like this girl? We have a really good thing going on and I wouldn’t want to jeopardize that because the ‘universe’ says so.” He lifts his fingers into a quotation mark. “At this point, I don’t even think soulmates are a real thing. I mean, sure, our friends are happy together with their fun, colourful lives but I’m quite content with Ji-ah. We just get each other.”
“Well, Mr Debby Downer,” you pout, putting your paintbrush into the bucket of water by your side. “I appreciate your thoughts on the situation, I’ll be sure to rub it in your face when you eventually meet your soulmate and fall in love and never want to leave their side.” You smirk to yourself.
“Yeah, like that’ll happen.” He huffs, putting his paintbrush down as well. “Soonyoung was right, you are a hopeless romantic.”
“Well of course I am,” you beam and if Jihoon didn’t know any better, your eyes almost seem like they’re sparkling. “I can’t wait to see colours and meet the person I’m destined to be with. There’s nothing wrong with having dreams, Lee Jihoon.” You smile, packing up the paints on the floor as you speak.
“Sure.” He hums again, standing up as you pack up the auditorium and collect your things. “Ready to go?” He asks as you nod, pulling your hood up over your head.
“You seriously didn’t know it was going to rain tonight?” You keep your hands stuffed in your pockets as your knitwear keeps you dry from the drizzling rain that falls from the sky.
“I don’t check the weather websites like an old woman.” Jihoon frowns, holding your umbrella over his head as he walks alongside you.
“You’re weird, Lee Jihoon.” You giggle quietly to yourself.
“Uh huh. I’ll be sure to let my soulmate know that when I meet them.” He remarks with a laugh as you walk together, letting the comfortable silence take over the both of you, the only sounds behind the rain pattering against your umbrella.
It takes the both of you 20 minutes to finally make it to your home and by the time you arrive, the rain has slowed to a light drizzle, the setting sun attempting to peak out behind the dark clouds.
“Well, thank you for walking me home, and the interesting take on soulmates, Oppa.” You smile as you step through the front gate, Jihoon still holding the umbrella over you so you don’t get wet. “I wish your soulmate the best of luck whenever you meet.”
“Likewise.” Jihoon laughs as you pull your hood off your head, getting ready to climb up the small staircase leading to the front door.
“I’ll see you for auditions, yeah?” You smiled as Jihoon nodded.
“Sure will.” He smiles, closing your umbrella as you turn to face the front door. “Oh, wait, your umbrella.”
“Oh, right.” You laugh, turning back and reaching out to take it from his hands, only for it to slip from his grasp at the last second.
“Crap, sorry-”
“Oops, sorry-”
You both reach for the umbrella on the pavement, fingertips brushing against each other gently. You let out a gasp as you look up to Jihoon’s face, his eyes changing colour right before yours, unexplainable colours starting to burst in all speckles of your vision. Your eyes widen as his face, clothing and the scenery around you lights up with multiple colours and shades, the now forgotten umbrella drops to the ground with a thud.
Jihoon is staring back at you with an unreadable expression, eyes mirroring yours as his hands shake. He feels dizzy as the sickeningly bright colours flood his vision. You’re staring at him in awe as the rain starts to grow heavier, coating the two of you with water.
“Oppa?” You ask quietly, so quietly that if Jihoon wasn’t looking at you when you said it, he would have missed it.
“…”
“Oppa, please say something..?” You ask shakily, and he shakes his head quickly. He can see it. You’re already imagining all the possibilities of your future. A future with him.
“… Don’t think this changes anything from what I told you at the Bee, Choi.” He grunts, not caring about the rain soaking his clothes. “I-I stand by it. You need to accept that I’m with Ji-ah, and nothing will change that.”
He pauses and waits for your response, growing more and more impatient as you just stare at him.
“W-well, if you don’t have anything more to say, then goodnight, Y/N.” Jihoon turns away, starting to head to the gate before feeling a sharp pain inside him. Wincing and reaching to hold the left side of his chest, he lets out a soft hiss. “Ah… what the hell?” He mutters to himself, turning back to look at you. He wishes he didn’t.
When you’re standing still, hand on your chest as the rain drenches your clothes, tears now falling freely down your cheeks is only then when Jihoon knows what he just felt; the only other side effect to having a soulmate.
He just felt your heart break.
“Y/N?” Jihoon asks cautiously.
As if snapping out of your trance, you blink a few times before whispering out “Don’t worry, Jihoon. No one will ever know. Just like you want.” You quickly turn and run up the stairs, opening the door to the house as Jihoon steps forward.
“Wait-” the door slams in his face as he reaches it, leaving him soaked, alone and feeling the pain of his soulmate’s broken heart.
“Hey, Bug! How was the Bee?” Seungcheol steps into the entryway from the kitchen, your eyes immediately falling to the multicoloured button up shirt he had on. “What do you think of my- Y/N?” Cheol stops as he sees the tears on your face, your chest heaving as you struggle to take a breath.
Without another word, you quickly run upstairs and into your bedroom, deep sobs leaving your chest as you curl up into a corner of the room and bury your face into your knees. Seungcheol followed you quickly, stepping into the room cautiously.
“Y/N? Love Bug, what has happened?” He asks quietly. “Are you hurt?” He sees you shake your head no, and he sighs with relief. “Let me turn the light on to check, just in case okay?”
“No.” You hiccup, your face staying buried in your knees, your stomach twisting in pain. “Please.. I d-don’t want to see it. I hate it. Don’t make me look at it!”
“Bug? Look at what?” Cheol asks worriedly, his hand resting on the top of your head.
“Colour.” You sob, your body slumping against your brother. “I hate colour, I hate soulmates, I hate it!” You cry harder, your tears soaking into his stupid colourful shirt.
#seventeen x reader#seventeen angst#seventeen#woozi#woozi x you#woozi x reader#lee jihoon x reader#lee jihoon#woozi angst#woozi fluff#seventeen fanfic#jihoon x reader
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How long does it take for you to finish drawing?
I'm an artist (beginner) and i unconsciously set unrealistic goals for myself and need a reminder of how long it takes to complete a drawing, Thanks.
Hi!
In the context you presented it in, that is a really interesting question, so I'll try to approach it thoroughly. I hope I won't make you roll your eyes too much.
Where to start, where to start... I guess the first thing I should say is that there is a difference between time I spend preforming the action of <drawing>, and the time I spent <working> on a particular piece. The first would be counted in hours, the second one - days.
I'm a big believer in slowing things down, and giving things time - going through options, gathering research and references, taking breaks every 1h of sitting and drawing - and seeing things through until I achieve the goal I set at the beginning of the process.
The goals are usually different each time: "quick design", "character exploration", "analysis of an artist's linework and experimenting with the knowledge gained", "creating an aesthetically pleasing image", and so on and so forth. Of course I don't write these down like it's a school assignment, but knowing in the back of my head what I'm actually doing helps me manage my expectations. I also enjoy being conscious of why I create - when I was younger regardless of what I was doing I had the thought "AND IT MUST LOOK GOOD AND PRESENTABLE! BECAUSE PEOPLE WILL LOOK!" ...and I think that obsession is the cancer of creative process.
Since the goals for each picture are different, the time I'll spent on achieving each one will be different as well, because the "satisfactory results" lay in different places.
For example, the Marcile sketchpage was created in one afternoon, and took approximately 3 hours. The goal was to play around with a brush that has no opacity forcing my lines to be more decisive. I did that and so it is "finished". There's nothing else I want from it.
On the other hand, the cover of Asterism took about 10 days to create, the goal of which was to make "an aesthetically pleasing cover picture taking colour inspiration from the works of (specific list of artists)". I took my time designing it so that it looks aesthetically pleasing, made sure the anatomy is "correct" (a nebulous statement when it comes to stylised humans), took my time masking, and picking colours, and shading. I wanted it to "look good" to my own eyes so if something was not working I would go back, change it, alter it, move it around... that's the wonderful thing about personal art, you can take as long as you like making something satisfactory.
The funny thing is, with what the Asterism cover actually is (a cellshaded image), it could have been done probably in 4 days by the me 4 years ago. But that person was willing to sit 8-10 hours a day to draw with no breaks, she had little social life, and treated herself as a little circus seal performing tricks so that people clap around her, and the clapping was soooo nice because it meant that people remembered her and she mattered. And it worked for her! For long 10 years! Until her arm gave out, and the reality of never being able to draw again became more tangible than ever, and it's been following her like a fog ever since for the past 4 years. The me today works about 4 hours a day and every hour I take about a 30 minute break. I also don't post half the stuff I draw.
There is also another aspect that dictates the speed of creating and that is familiarity with the subject matter. The less you know something, the fast you'll draw it! But as you get to know the intricacies of the process, and see all the building blocks, it will start taking *longer* because you will start accounting for every block. But then you'll eventually get familiar with the blocks and so the time spent on a picture will go down again! The cool yet overwhelming thing about art is that, there are always hundreds of building blocks. Form, composition, ambient occlusion, saturation, hue, light balance, line form...... and those are just the *some* of the generalised *categories*. And each category will have it's own subsection of building blocks! And then those blocks will interact with each other to create completely new area of expertise! This is crazy!
Marcille sketch page took me only 3 hours to create because I am already quite familiar with linework - I have drawn 3-4 comicbooks worth of linework. This also means I am familiar with believable anatomy, more or less, which got utilised in the Asterism cover - the main bulk of linework got created during a 3h livestream.
So.... what's the answer.... "It's all relative" is so unsatisfactory and probably not what you looked for. But you can draw something in 3 days and kill your body over it. Or you can become an expert in a field and dish the same picture out effortlessly in 8 hours. You can also split that 8h block over multiple days bringing you back up to 3 days. You could even add a whole day of visual research which might make your picture only marginally better.
And even if we calculate it in terms of raw working time, pen-to-paper, like a self-inflicted capitalist tumor, that time can fluctuate still due to personal visual library and knowledge base. If I asked Tom Fox how long it takes for him to create his sketch pages his answer would probably be downward of 30 minutes. Yet I need whole 3 hours to create something *less* anatomically correct than him.
And so here we are at the end of this perhaps unnecessary essay. And all we learned is this: it depends.
Dry, not nuanced tl;dr, my personal timings: single sketch - 30mins; single linework pic 1-2h; Cellshaded illust - 16h; Rendered illust: 20-25h.
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