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#i don't always deliver but when i do it's a month late
ferlost · 1 year
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I will absolutely roll the dice, because it will inevitably be a "holy shit, a cake!" situation. My request is someone (your choice, and humanoid/engine form doesn't matter) enjoying music (in whatever way that means- playing an instrument, listening, dancing, etc.) 💚💙💛
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bunjywunjy · 6 months
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Hello Dear Friend.
I was in your country in 2019.I have gone through your profile and decided to go straight to the point on why i wholeheartedly contacting you.
My name is Mrs. Marion Gadsby from Thailand,Australian,79years,I have been diagnosed with Esophageal cancer .It has defiled all forms of medical treatment, and right now I have only about a month to live, according to medical experts. I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I never really cared for anyone (not even myself) but my business was my priority.
Though I am a very rich lady, I was never generous, I was always hostile to people and only focused on my business as that was the only thing I cared for. But now I regret all this as I now know that there is more to life than just wanting to have or make all the money in the world.
I Am very sick now and depends on machines to survive which I know one day one minute I will be no more , but before departing I have a fortune I will like to confined your position so that you can use it and do the humanitarian work which I failed to do when I had the grace and the time. I have willed and given to my immediate and extended family members ,but these last funds I would want to be useful to the poor and the needy. I don't trust any of my family members again because I don't think that they will deliver the fortune to the poor and needy. This is the main reason why I contacted you because I believe you will make it happen as I will instruct you in the future when the fortune is in your hands.
I want God to be merciful to me and accept my soul, so I have decided to give alms to charity organizations, as I want this to be one of the last good deeds I do on earth.
I cannot do this myself anymore. I once asked members of my family to close one of my accounts and distribute the money which I have there to charity organizations in Bulgaria and Pakistan, but they refused and kept the money to themselves and used it to buy flashy cars and big houses in the city. Hence, I do not trust them anymore, as they seem not to be content with what I have left for them. The last of my money which no one knows of is the sum of $3,000,000.00( Three Million dollars) my late husband was wealthy as an oil mogul, politician and other businesses, but he died in his private jet crash .WE CAN'T QUESTION GOD.
I will let you have 20% of his funds for your effort and time and the 80% should go to the poor and needy around you, especially those that are in war zones. Treat this message confidentially till it's done. I am waiting for your reply.
Contact me direct for more information. [email protected]
Mrs Marion Gasby. [email protected]
MRS MARION GADSBY FROM THAILAND AUSTRALIAN
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hoshifighting · 4 months
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Ways to Have a Man in the Palm of Your Hand.
Synopsis: In the flow of uncertainty that defined your situationship with Mingyu, you decide to take action, making Mingyu start chasing after you like a loyal puppy.
Word Count: 3.9k
Warnings: Smut, unprotected sex, overstimulation, degradation, begging on knees, oral (f. receiving), fingering– he watches reader fingering herself, handjob, dick riding, penetrative sex, humiliating, manipulation and etc.
Your life connected with Mingyu's since you both first met through your groups of friends, and a situationship had emerged between you two. It was just sex, with no strings attached and no promises made.
Yet, as the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months, it became challenging to keep your heart safe from the unpredictable tides of emotion.
Mingyu had a way of making you feel special. He'd surprise you with homemade dinners, he was attentive, considerate, and made sure to put your self-esteem on the highest with his skillful photography.
The tall and good-looking guy wasn't just amazing during sex; he was an enigma that both fascinated and frustrated you. Mingyu could vanish for days, leaving you on blue. But just as you were about to write him off, he'd resurface, as if nothing had happened. It was a maddening cycle, and yet, you found yourself caught in its web.
Mingyu: Hey! Been swamped asf with work lately. Let's grab coffee or something stronger soon? Let me know when you're free!
You couldn't help but scoff as you read Mingyu's message. His casual tone and nonchalant invitation stirred a mix of irritation and amusement within you. Swiftly typing a response, you questioned his unpredictable appearances.
You: Are you planning on always popping up out of nowhere like this?
Mingyu: I always come back, don't I? So, when are we catching up darling?
Despite the inner conflict and your ego's warning signals, there was an undeniable allure to Mingyu's charm. His words, laced with playfulness, had a magnetic effect that bypassed rational thoughts. With a sigh, you found yourself succumbing to the familiar pull.
The room was filled with the echoes of skin slapping as you both lay on Mingyu's bed, your eyes locked as you two moaned out loud, the crescendo of pleasure punctuated by the rhythmic thud of the bed against the wall.
Mingyu lays beside you, the heat of the moment still lingering between your bodies. You rose from the tangled sheets, picking up your scattered clothes. Mingyu's gaze remained fixed on you, an intensity that betrayed a deeper connection than the situationship allowed. 
"I really like spending time with you Y/N" 
"Me too Gyu." 
[...]
Seungkwan leaned in "Okay, spill. What's the latest drama with Mingyu?"
You sighed, running a hand through your hair. "Honestly, I can't figure him out. It's like a cycle. We talk every day for a month, hang out, fuck, and then poof! He disappears for a week or more. I don't get it."
Seungkwan chuckled knowingly. "You know, maybe you should try something. Do the same to him, but take it up a notch. Make him miss you even more."
You furrowed your eyebrows, slightly taken aback. "Seungkwan, I'm not into playing games or being spiteful. It's not my style."
He waved his hand dismissively. "No, no, hear me out. It's not about being spiteful. It's about making him realize what he's missing. Mingyu knows you'll always be there, right? So, he takes it for granted. Maybe he needs a taste of his own medicine."
You raised an eyebrow, intrigued but cautious. "And how exactly do I do that?"
Your mouth hung open as Seungkwan delivered his comprehensive lesson in the art of emotional tactics. The confidence in his advice left you both amazed and slightly apprehensive. Unable to contain your curiosity any longer, you finally asked the burning question.
"How on earth do you know all of this, Seungkwan?" you inquired, eyes wide with disbelief.
Seungkwan leaned back, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Well, my dear friend, when you've been in the game as long as I have and witnessed enough romantic dramas unfold, you start picking up on patterns. It's like a survival guide for the heart."
You raised an eyebrow, still processing the information. "Survival guide, huh? And all this contempt, playing hard to get, and hurting egos – that's your secret weapon?"
Seungkwan chuckled, "Not a secret weapon, sometimes, a little strategic move can make all the difference. Trust me, I've seen it all."
With Seungkwan's advice resonating in your mind like a strategic playbook, you approached the next phase of your relationship with Mingyu, with a newfound determination. It felt like diving into a complex homework assignment, each step carefully calculated to shift the dynamics in your favor.
As you decided to implement the first step, a newfound sense of liberation washed over you. You stopped responding to Mingyu's messages immediately and resisted the urge to initiate contact. It felt strange at first, but there was a sense of power in reclaiming your time and not being at his beck and call. Mingyu's messages awaited your attention. 
The challenge of making Mingyu realize he could lose you sparked a newfound determination. Your calendar filled up with plans that didn't involve Mingyu. Mingyu, accustomed to your constant availability, seemed to sense the change, though he couldn't quite pinpoint it. He might have been the object of desire for many hoes, but your indifference challenged his accustomed narrative. 
After all, a man is not more important than your personal goals, right?
All while allowing Mingyu to observe your life unfolding without him. The realization that you were not waiting by the phone for him sparked a large curiosity.
Throughout the process, a mix of emotions surfaced. Doubt, at times, whispered in the back of your mind – was this the right approach? Seungkwan's advice, unconventional as it was, had brought a shift in Mingyu's behavior. Now, you wondered how Mingyu would respond to the transformed version of you – a person who refused to be taken for granted.
Mingyu's relentless messages flooded your phone. The janitor, a silent witness to the unfolding drama, discreetly shared the news of Mingyu's visits to your condominium entrance. Three times he had appeared, seeking a glimpse of you, only to be met with the absence of your presence, the deliberate distance, and the air of indifference were beginning to provoke a reaction from him.
You were determined to see this journey through, to understand whether Mingyu's renewed interest was genuine or a fleeting reaction to the perceived loss of control.
The persistent pings of Mingyu's messages had become a constant background noise in your life, infiltrating your workdays and even interrupting the serene moments of your brunches.
"Free today, Ms. Busy?"
"Pls respond to me. :(("
"Why are you acting like this?"
"Wtf…"
"Omggg, when are you going to answer me properly?"
"I'll invade your house."
"Y/N-ieeee, pleaseee!"
"I really want to see you right now."
"You make me so confused :("
The encounter at the pedestrian crossing unfolded in a scene of unexpected tension. Mingyu, spotting you in the midst of your Sunday morning run with Seungkwan, seized the opportunity to bridge the gap that had grown between you. As you halted, waiting for the light to change, Mingyu approached, a mixture of eagerness and confusion etched across his face.
"Hey there! Fancy meeting you here," Mingyu greeted, attempting to strike up a conversation.
Seungkwan, standing beside you, looked on with a side-eyed glance, a smirk playing on his lips as he sipped casually from his water bottle. As the pedestrian light shifted to green, you seized the moment to extricate yourself from the short encounter. "Sorry, Mingyu, I really need to finish my morning walk. Catch you later," you excused yourself, leaving Mingyu standing there, perplexed and surrounded by the bustling activity of the street.
He couldn't shake off the confusion – Why weren't you responding as before? Why weren't you as available as you used to be? Did you at least still like him? It dawned on Mingyu that the game had changed, and he wasn't sure if he understood the rules anymore. The pursuit, once fueled by the expectation of your constant availability, now seemed to slip through his fingers like grains of sand. The reality of being just one among the many who sought your attention was a bitter pill to swallow.
[...]
The doorbell's unexpected chime disrupted the tranquility of your self-care routine, with moisturized skin and a mind ready for a cozy movie night, you approached the door, curiosity dancing in your eyes.
As you swung the door open, the sulky face of Mingyu greeted you. A momentary pause hung in the air, your eyes meeting his in silent expectation. Before you could utter a word, Mingyu stepped inside, dropping to his knees and hugging your legs as if seeking solace.
Surprised by his sudden display of vulnerability, you widen your eyes, caught off guard by the intensity of his reaction. The door lingered ajar, and you managed to close it, arms crossed, a mixture of confusion and caution etched on your face.
Mingyu, still hugging your legs, looked up at you with pleading eyes, his voice laden with remorse. "What did I do, Y/N? Why are you treating me like this? I'm sorry."
"Hm?"
He looked up at you, his eyes brimming with a mix of confusion and regret. "I just… I don' understand. I miss you," he admitted, his voice trailing off.
Your initial surprise transformed into a mix of emotions – disbelief, a hint of empathy, and the need to assert your newfound boundaries. Crossed arms and a measured gaze met Mingyu's desperate expression. The sudden intrusion into your personal space prompted a silent assessment of the situation.
"What did you expect, Mingyu?" you countered, your voice steady but laced with the weight of unspoken questions. "You disappear, then reappear, and now you're kneeling in my living room. What's going on?"
"I messed up, okay? I thought I could keep things casual, but I didn't expect to feel like this. I miss the way things used to be between us." he confessed, his voice carrying a raw honesty.
"You ask me to come to your house, and then after you get what you wanted, you let me go. Do I look like a food delivery or something?" you confronted Mingyu, your words cutting through the charged silence that hung in the room.
Mingyu's eyes widened at your accusation, shock and a hint of hurt registering on his face. "No, no, no, Y/N, it wasn't like that."
You raised an eyebrow, a mix of skepticism and frustration evident in your expression. "It feels like you only want me around when it's convenient for you."
Mingyu, still on his knees, looked up at you, his eyes pleading for understanding. "It's not like that. I just... I didn't want to push you. I thought you preferred it this way."
You sighed, the weight of the unresolved tension palpable. "Mingyu, I can't read your mind. If you want me to stay, you have to say it. Communication goes both ways."
"Y/N, I'm truly sorry. I'll do whatever you want. I didn't see you as just a fleeting thing, and I want to be present."
Mingyu's earnest apology hung in the air, a plea for understanding and a promise to change. As he laid his face on your bare thighs, expressing his sincere regret, you cut through the moment with a tsk sound, a dismissive gesture that left him wide-eyed and caught off guard.
"Poor boy, begging on his knees for attention. What a shame," you remarked, a hint of teasing in your voice as you observed his reaction.
Mingyu, his hands now gripping each side of your thighs, sat back on his feet, his expression a mix of surprise and a subtle flush coloring his cheeks. He hadn't anticipated this response, your playful teasing catching him off guard.
"You didn't see me as a fleeting thing?" you continued, your tone mockingly contemplative. "Well, Mingyu, this is quite a sight – you, on your knees, practically begging for my attention. I'd never do something like this."
His widened eyes met yours, uncertainty and a trace of embarrassment flickering in them. Mingyu's bit his lip, cheeks flushing deeper.
"I'll do whatever you want, Y/N. Just tell me," Mingyu replied, his hands still holding your thighs.
You let out a soft chuckle, running a hand through his hair as you continued your teasing. "Oh, Mingyu-ah, the mighty one on his knees. Maybe you'll learn to appreciate what you have when it's not handed to you on a silver platter. Now, let's see if you can keep up with your promises."
As you spoke, Mingyu's cheeks continued to flush, a complex dance of emotions playing out on his face.  "How can you forgive me?" 
Mingyu's question hung in the air, a genuine plea for forgiveness. You paused, considering the weight of his words, before adopting a more serious tone.
"Get up," you instructed him, your voice carrying a command that seemed to catch him off guard.
Mingyu, without hesitation, rose to his feet from his submissive position. His eyes fixed on you. An arched eyebrow and a smirk played on your face, savoring the moment of dominance as you instructed him to follow you.
The atmosphere grew charged with anticipation as Mingyu attentively trailed behind you, his eyes inevitably drawn to your body covered only by a shirt. The click of your bedroom door signaled a shift in the dynamics, and when you turned to face him, his eagerness manifested in an attempted kiss.
Your finger halted his advance, a calculated pause preceding your question, "Do you think you deserve to kiss me?"
Mingyu, his eyes reflecting a mix of longing and remorse, shook his head no. Your smirk deepened as you delivered a verdict that left him whimpering.
"Then you won't kiss me today."
A whimper escaped Mingyu's lips, a sound that echoed the frustration and desire that simmered beneath the surface. The unexpected turn of events had left him yearning for a connection, yet you, in your assertive control, denied him that solace.
As the tension hung in the air, Mingyu's eyes glistened with unshed tears. The dynamics between you had taken a surprising turn, a power play that left both of you navigating the intricate threads of desire, forgiveness, and the consequences of a maybe – ex-complicated situationship.
With a commanding tone, you instructed Mingyu to kneel once again, a subtle smirk playing on your lips. He obeyed, sinking down to his knees with a mix of anticipation and eagerness. The air in the room crackled with a palpable tension as you laid down the terms.
"If you act like a good boy, maybe I'll forgive you," you declared, your voice carrying a hint of authority.
Mingyu nodded earnestly, a silent pledge to abide by your terms. As you proceeded to remove your shirt, next your pantie, allowing it to fall to the floor, the atmosphere became charged with a new layer of intensity. 
"How much do you want this pussy Mingyu?" you inquired, the question hanging in the air as you observed Mingyu's reaction. His shoulders slumped, a subtle expression of desire and longing evident on his face.
"A lot," he moaned, the words escaping his lips with a mixture of need and surrender. Your legs spread open, an invitation too tempting, as he feels his mouth waters at the view. 
"Open your mouth," you commanded Mingyu, your voice carrying an air of authority. He complied without hesitation, anticipation flickering in his eyes.
As he held his mouth open, you slid two fingers inside, the intimate contact a subtle exploration of boundaries and desire. Mingyu's tongue teased your fingers, a provocative dance that elicited a hiss from you.
"No teasing," you admonished, a note of warning in your voice. With a swift motion, you delivered a little slap to his chin as you withdrew your fingers from his mouth. The air crackled with a newfound tension, a moment that blurred the lines between control and submission.
Mingyu furrowed his eyebrows, as he watched your fingers slowly disappearing inside of your cunt, your fingers and your slick gushes out of you, and all he can do is watch. He sits patiently on his feet, watching your fingers leaving and entering your pussy in a too provocative rhythm. His bottom lip quivering to the desire of eating you out.
"Please Y/N…"
"What?''
"Please, let me eat you out, it looks so good…"
To tease him even more, you fastened your fingers, moaning while your cunt sounded like Mingyu's favorite song, wet, luscious, mouthwatering, appetizing, tempting. He cries out, his hands together on his lap. "Please, I beg you, I missed you so bad." 
The room was charged with a blend of anticipation and surrender as you stopped, taking a moment to look at Mingyu's mournful face. The desire in his eyes was palpable, and the silent plea for what he had begged for lingered in the air.
With a subtle nod, you allowed him to fulfill his request. Mingyu, starved and eager, approached the task with a concentration that hinted at a deep desire to please you. As he held you with a gentle yet fervent touch, mouthing your pussy, licking you clean, his focus on your pleasure was unwavering. The way he clung to you conveyed a fear of losing you, made you mewl as he sucked your clit, you held onto the sheets, a silent anchor in the sea of sensations. Mingyu's devotion and the way he concentrated on your pleasure only intensified the building release within you. Like a wave, you're cumming all over his mouth and chin, he hums in response flickering your clit with his tongue.
"Enough." You breathe out, closing your legs. "Strip, and lay for me." 
Mingyu rose from the floor, a determined look on his face, seemingly oblivious to any discomfort his knees might be feeling. The sounds of his clothing being discarded echoed in the room, punctuated by the soft thud as he settled onto the bed. The mattress shifted as he moved closer, his warm touch caressing your arm.
"What are you going to do?" he asked, his voice a low murmur, a hint of curiosity and desire lingering in the air.
"Don't touch me," you instructed Mingyu, your tone carrying a note of command as you climbed onto his lap. Leaving him momentarily frozen, his hands hovering in the air, uncertain of where to go.
The close proximity of his cock intensified the wetness between your thighs. Mingyu, eager and responsive, looked at you with a mix of desire and restraint, his hands now cautiously placed together on his chest.
The atmosphere crackled with a blend of dominance and submission as you straddled Mingyu, humping your wet pussy against his cock, your movements deliberate and provocative. His moans in response to your degrading words only heightened the intensity of the moment.
"Oh my god, look at you," you cooed, your voice a mix of mockery and desire. "I just stopped paying attention to you, and you came fucking begging me to talk with you. You're humiliating, Mingyu."
His moans, a symphony of pleasure and submission, filled the room. Mingyu's response to your degrading words conveyed a complex dance of desire and self-awareness. The acknowledgment that he deserved the degradation.
The room filled with a momentary hush as you sank your hips, Mingyu's length now fully inside. He shut his eyes, a silent surrender to the sensations that enveloped him. 
The unspoken admission hung in the air—though you wouldn't openly admit it, there was a trace of longing, a subtle acknowledgment that, despite the complexities, you had missed him a little. The air became charged with a mix of desire and restraint as your hips rode him, his length fully fulfilling the connection between you.
His angry tip brushed against that special spot, sending a surge of pleasure through both of you, cause now, you were so tight around him. "I'm going to cum, f-fuck"
"You better not." 
The charged atmosphere intensified as you edged Mingyu, denying him release, while simultaneously relishing in the control you held over his pleasure. He gasped for air, his eyes clenched shut, a desperate attempt to hold back as your dominating presence and the sensations of your movements threatened to overwhelm him.
Your hips moved with a purposeful intensity, driving him to the edge, and his body contorted in a desperate attempt to maintain control. The struggle was evident in the way his breath hitched and his eyes rolled back, succumbing to the overwhelming pleasure that surged through him.
"I-I can't hold it anymore," he stuttered, his voice strained with the effort of restraint.
"If you cum, I will-"
The moment of release was inevitable. Mingyu's hot cum filled you, triggering your own orgasm, he cried out your name, making your wall clench harder around him.
As Mingyu managed a string of apologies, you allowed him to slide out of you, leaving his lap coated with both of your arousal, your legs damp with his seed. 
The scoff echoed in the room, a mix of amusement and assertion. However, your actions spoke a different language. As you tighten your legs around the sides of Mingyu's legs, restraining his movement, your hands take control, pumping his cock fast. The focus on his red tip elicited a loud cry from Mingyu, his back lifting off the mattress in response to the overstimulation.
The wet sounds filled the bedroom as the intensity of your touch drove him to the edge. Mingyu's hands gripped the pillow beneath his head, a desperate attempt to anchor himself in the whirlwind of sensations that consumed him.
As Mingyu's body trembled under the heightened sensations, he felt a knot tightening in his abdomen, a sensation he hadn't anticipated. The overwhelming intensity built up to a point where he couldn't contain it anymore. A primal scream tore from his lips, his body convulsing in the throes of another orgasm.
His cum pooled on his abdomen, a physical manifestation of the powerful release that coursed through him. You observed his trembling body, struck by the raw intensity of his response. Mingyu's reaction seemed to surpass any previous experiences, his vulnerability and ecstasy on display in a way you hadn't witnessed before.
"Sorry, I came without your permission…"
"Enough with the sorry's, Mingyu," you said with a soft smile. "Let's just take a bath."
As the warm water cascaded around you, cleansing away the external worries, you both found solace in the simplicity of the moment. Emerging from the bath, you lay on the bed alone, the silence speaking volumes. Mingyu, holding his shirt, stood in contemplation. His gaze met yours, and he released a breath he seemed to have been holding.
The room felt charged with unspoken emotions when Mingyu finally gathered the courage to ask, "Can we sleep together tonight? Can I stay here with you?"
His eyes held a lot of shyness, and for a moment, you felt a genuine change in the air. You bit your lip, a subtle smile playing on your lips. In response, you patted the bed twice, a silent invitation for him to join you.
Mingyu threw his shirt away with a smile, a blend of shyness and excitement. He settled on the bed, maintaining a cautious distance, uncertain about what the night held. Your gaze met his, and you turned to face him. His eyes sparkled, and with a newfound boldness, he closed the gap and hugged you tightly.
"Don't be away from me again," he whispered, his voice tinged with vulnerability. And for the first time in those weeks, you let yourself savor the sweet taste of his pink soft lips, making him melt in response.
You smiled, your palms sliding gently along his back. The walls that once stood between you seemed to crumble as Mingyu embraced you, his actions speaking louder than any words. In that moment, it felt like a page turned, and a new chapter began.
Well, Seungkwan, you knew a lot. The five ways to have a man in the palm of your hand indeed. 
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httpsserene · 7 months
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ʜᴛᴛᴘꜱꜱᴇʀᴇɴᴇ'ꜱ ꜰ1 ᴋɪɴᴋᴛᴏʙᴇʀ ꜱᴘᴇᴄɪᴀʟ
ᴜᴘʟᴏᴀᴅ 1 : ᴄʜᴀʀʟᴇꜱ ʟᴇᴄʟᴇʀᴄ / ᴍᴀx ᴠᴇʀꜱᴛᴀᴘᴘᴇɴ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ |ᴄᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛɪᴏɴ ᴋɪɴᴋ
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📖ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: innocent and virgin !reader has never touched herself before. she knows how to, in theory, but whenever she tries, she chickens out. her tried and true way of receiving pleasure is failing her. she thinks that maybe it's time to allow her relationship with her two respectful and experienced boyfriends, to reach the next step. and she'll find that they're very willing to teach her a few things. 📖ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: 18+ only. smut. corruption kink. orgasm delay/denial. praise kink. dom/sub undertones. hair-pulling. possessiveness. slight choking (glimpse and you miss it?). brief reference to previous dub-con (very minuscule, not charles or max). no penetrative sex. 📖ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 8k words 📖ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: charles leclerc / max verstappen x fem!black!reader 📖ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: oneshot 📖ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅᴛʀᴀᴄᴋ: all mine • brent faiyaz
ᴘʀᴇꜰᴀᴄᴇ: the strength i had to summon to post this is something crazy. it's my first smut fic if you can believe it or not, but the way i feel exposed to the world is wild. i almost forgot to include the actual kink because i got carried away, but it's there i promise you, don't get disappointed too early in! can confirm that while i was writing this i had to take several breaks and stare at the ceiling. the black!reader is vague i think, it's not noticeable until the end, but i had written it with all shades of my poc girlies in mind < 3. n e ways: hope you guys like it!
want to be added to my f1 kinktober taglist? or my general tag list? send me an ask!
huge thanks to my beta readers @lorarri and @sweetpiccolo-blog ! i appreciate y'all so much :)
cross-posted on my ao3, htpsss
here's the link to the masterlist for my f1 kinktober special, and send me a private message if you would like to be added to the list to become a beta reader in the future!!!
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it’s late. you’ve kicked jimmy and sassy out of the bedroom, and locked it shut. you’re standing with your back pressed against the door, staring with unfocused eyes. you moved your stuffed animals inside the closet and had them facing the wall even though you closed the closet door. the window curtains are drawn shut, and the only light in the room is the warmth of one nightstand lamp. one of the plushest towels max owns is spread across the bed. in the center lays a single pillow.
this is the last chance you have to get off before max and charles get home in a few hours. they’ve been gone for a triple-header, and you haven’t been able to orgasm once in the near month they’ve been gone. you’ve become depraved enough to consider buying a vibrator, but all packages delivered to this apartment have to be approved by max or charles to be sent up, and you’re definitely not bold enough to go out and buy one (and risk being seen by one of their fans or have to physically talk to someone to buy one).
the obvious thing to do would be to talk to your boyfriends, and tell them that you’re ready to start exploring the sexual side of your relationship. you’ve been dating them for two years now, and you’re afraid that they’re getting tired of waiting for you to be comfortable enough to have sex with them. but, you’re also afraid that once they learn how inexperienced you really are—they’ll make fun of you, leave you, and find some other woman who knows how to please them. you know that’s outrageous and never going to happen. they’re the sweetest boys you’ve ever dated (way better than that one dude you dated who tried to get you wasted enough to persuade you into having sex with him), and they’ve been very respectful concerning your boundaries. always pulling away when they feel themselves getting hard, and constantly reminding you to tell them to stop if you feel uncomfortable and that there’s nothing wrong with that, and that they’re willing to wait as long as you need, and will continue loving you regardless even if you decide to never have sex with them. so—of course you know that they won’t be assholes about your innocence—it’s just your own self-esteem, insecurity, and overthinking that prevents you from saying you’re ready.
you make a deal with yourself. if you can’t manage to get off grinding against your pillow one last time, you’ll force yourself to sit down with your boyfriends, stare them in the eyes and state that your ready to have sex. who are you kidding—you’re going to get off right now one way or another even if it kills you, because you definitely will wither away and die if you have to have that conversation with your boyfriends.
you walk over to the bed, heart beginning to race as you start playing one of those curated “songs i’d like to be railed to” playlists, before throwing your phone somewhere up the bed. you move to straddle the pillow, and begin to calm your heartbeat. you take a few deep breaths and let your mind wander. the first thought that comes to your head is the goodbye kiss you got from your boyfriends before they left. 
they had gotten all their luggage together and were pulling on their shoes at the entryway. charles was pouting at you, wide green eyes and all, “you are sure that you don’t want to come with us? for at least one of the races? we’ll be gone for almost a—“ 
“yes, cha. i’m sure,” you cut him off with a firm nod, “lemme give you a kiss before you leave, okay?”
charles frowned at max who laughed—like he wasn’t the one begging you to come with them last night before you all went to bed. with a little upset ‘hmph’ charles leaned down and kissed you softly. you had pulled away, only trying to give him a peck, and charles grunted disapprovingly. one of his veiny hands rose and gripped at your waist over your t-shirt, strongly pulling you forward, causing you to tumble into his chest. “oh, i am going to need more than that, mon ange,” charles smirked down at you, “i am leaving for so long, and that’s the goodbye kiss you’re leaving me with? no, i do not think so.” 
you glanced away from him, cheeks beginning to become warm as you make to hide your face is his broad chest. charles tutted at you, tightening his grip on your waist, and his other hand gently pushed your head up to look at him, “c’mere and give me a real kiss, pretty girl.”
you made a suppressed little squeal in the back of your throat, a noise max and charles became very familiar with, often present when they start teasing you. you surprisingly leaned up and initiated the kiss, causing charles to let out a shocked gasp into your mouth. his hand on your waist moved lower, falling to the small of your back and pushed your body completely against his. his other hand caressed your jaw, soothing you enough to allow him to control the kiss, as he flicked his tongue at the seam of your lips. you shakily sighed, allowing him entrance and the kiss deepened, a pleased humming noise in the back of your throat escaping.
you impatiently shift side to side on top of the pillow, not yet allowing yourself to get any friction. sliding both of your hands underneath your sweater—well, max’s sweater, and you start playing with your chest. flicking gently at your nipples, just the way you like. 
you could feel charles chuckle into the kiss, but you dismiss it, and keep kissing at him eagerly. however, you failed to recognize that he wasn’t laughing at you, he was laughing at max. cockily making eye-contact with him, before he let his eyes flutter shut and devoted his attention to you.
max stared on, his mouth slightly open as he watched his two loves give him a show for free. charles’ hand slipped lower, gliding over your ass, across your criminally well-fitted jeans, and found its home on the back of your thigh. max is well acquainted with how skilled charles’ mouth is, so he knows he must have done something spectacular to cause a choked-off moan to escape you, your hand raised to grab at charles’ polo in a fist, wrinkling the pressed shirt. max huffed, deciding to no longer spectate, and took the few steps to reach you across the foyer.
you let out a shocked gasp, eyes fluttering open in surprise at the feeling of your other boyfriend pressed up against your back. you attempt to break the kiss, but charles doesn’t let you. hand slipping from your cheeks to the nape of your neck, tangling in the hairs there and keeping you exactly where he wants. one of max’s hands came to rest at your hip, while the other rested on your navel. your eyes fell shut again in pleasure at how charles gently nipped at your bottom lip, and max’s presence is pushed to the back of your mind.
you didn’t register max’s hand disappearing from your abdomen, but suddenly, the air was cut with a pained moan from charles and his lips were ripped away from yours.
your eyes flew open, and max’s hand was buried in charles’ hair, tugging his head backward and maneuvering it into what must be an almost uncomfortable angle, but with how pleased charles looked—you wanted to feel it too. his eyes rolled backwards, before he pressed them shut and re-opened them to reveal dilated pupils and half-lidded lashes; panting hard, lips covered with your shared spit, and a fucked-out look in his eyes.
you struggle to pull off your sleeping shorts, eventually managing to tug them off to reveal your white cotton panties. your hand leaves your breast to touch at your heat, and you’re shocked at how wet you’ve gotten already. you use that same hand to adjust your pillow, before you let your hips fall all the way and make contact with the pillow. you sigh in relief.
now, max is the one to laugh with his hand firmly keeping charles in place. “oh, you know better than to tease me charlie…” he started, and you barely heard him. fixated on the way charles’ tongue frequently slips out to lick at his lips, but you could hear the smirk max was wearing. 
“and you’re also not the only one leaving our sweet girl for a month. you should be nice and let me have a taste too, hm? isn’t that right, schatje?” he directs at charles. max’s other hand made its way up your abdomen, copping a feel at your chest, before it rested across your throat. he wasn’t squeezing at all, but the weight of his hand, how it spans across your neck, and how you can feel the strength lying underneath his skin, caused you to lose your breath. he guided your head back and dropped his to get his own goodbye kiss.
the kiss felt like it lasted for a lifetime, but realistically it had to be less than a minute of max forcing charles to watch how he ravaged your mouth, before charles started whining loudly. max patted your neck gingerly before pulling away and laughing at charles’ teary eyes. your legs were trembling and you were pretty sure if max wasn’t behind you, you would’ve fallen long ago. in one smooth motion, his hand fell to the monegasque’s throat from his hair and pulled him closer, completely sandwiching you between them, as their lips met in a wild kiss. 
your hips start to rock against the pillow, keeping it slow in the beginning, learning your lesson about friction burn the last time you got too erratic with your moves too quickly.
charles—completely desperate—whined deep in his throat and max kept pulling consistently depraved moans and grunts out of your boyfriend. max’s other hand moved off of your hip to smack at charles’, a nonverbal command for him to calm down and let max take care of him. you felt charles practically vibrating against you in need, but he slowly started to calm; his posture slackening and lips slowing, allowing the dutch full control. 
the two of them were completely ignoring you. caught in their own world, putting all of their energy into their kisses, and in turn gave you a front row seat to something you're never going to forget about. you felt so small in between the two of them, like the only thing that kept you from floating away is the fact that you were stuck in between their bodies.
eventually, max released his grip on charles and separated from the kiss, giving charles air to breathe. the blonde stepped backwards away from your body, and you stumbled embarrassingly. max’s hands went up to hover around your waist (suddenly so shy to touch you) to make sure you actually didn't fall. charles shook his head, physically trying to clear the haze in his mind before he stumbled away from you as well, pressing his back against the wall. 
his chest was heaving with exertion, cheeks flushed a pretty red color, while his hands went to tug at his uncomfortably tight pants, failing to adjust himself to make his erection less obvious. he suddenly turns shy as well—it probably doesn’t help that max was laughing at how easy he is to turn on—, and charles tries to try and tug his shirt down to cover up his problem as best as he can. 
your hips start to pick up in speed, movements more sure and less shaky. the friction between the cotton pillowcase and panties is multiplied on your cunt, and when you rock down deep enough, the catch of the panties on your clit is nearly immobilizing. 
thinking about the moment before your boys left leads you into fantasizing about their dynamic, and how they are in the bedroom. that morning alone proved who was actually in charge; charles will tease and take whatever he can, as long as max allows him to. you can recall many instances of max guiding a well-fucked charles out of the bedroom and depositing him on your lap, before he went on to clean up and run the monegasque a bath. 
the multiple post-sex facetimes you’ve gotten from the two when they’re across the world always starts with max softly speaking, “i’ve worn him out pretty good, but he refuses to fall asleep unless he gets to call you.” and the phone is passed to charles, who’s voice and lips are ruined to hell and you have to decipher what he’s attempting to say.
you’re starting to acclimate to the current tempo, so you pick it up another notch. you lean forward, bracing your hands on the bed for support as you focus on doing deeper and slower grinds against the pillow, allowing your clit to get constant attention.
you find comfort in the fact that charles allows max to take him to such a vulnerable state, and sometimes—you even find yourself getting jealous. you started joining them to see their aftercare for yourself, and found out that you're aching to be taken apart and put back together like max and charles do to each other. 
the sound of max’s constant praises of charles being “so good for him,” and charles’s constant stream of “thank you, thank you, maxy” has you losing all train of thought.
you abandon the slow-and-steady technique, you’ve tried it several times this month and it’s failed to get you to come. you bite your lip, letting out a frustrated groan. your hips slow, and you grab the front of the pillow with one hand and pull it upwards, hoping that a tighter space allows better friction. you start moving quicker, doing smaller more shallow motions and it’s tons better. you can’t stop thinking that it would be even better to ride charles’ face. 
even though your eyelids are scrunched shut, the thousands of tiktok edits you’ve seen of your boyfriends post-race; balaclava lines, sweaty, messy hair, and all—are playing behind them. you moan out desperately, toes curling in your socks. you hear the phantom noises of monegasque moans along with the imagined whispers of dutch-accented praises. 
the knot in your navel tightens, your thighs begin to tremble, and you can feel yourself clenching around nothing. this is it, the feeling that’s escaped you for a month, it’s returning, you can finally come. 
you start to rut against the pillow, uncaring of how your wetness has seeped into the pillow cover and sticks against your thighs—if anything, it’s just another pleasant sensation. unfiltered squeals and gasps start slipping out, you’re too blissed out to regulate your volume at this point.
but then, a minute passes and you still haven’t fallen over the precipice. it’s right there; you can see it, you can even hear it, but you can’t fucking feel it. 
your moans of pleasure turn into cries of frustration. your legs start to quiver with exhaustion, and the orgasm you almost had fades. tears spill from your eyes, as you frantically rut against the soaked pillow, not caring about rhythm or technique anymore. and your chance is gone, your sobs echoing around the room at another failed attempt.
you climb off the pillow and fall on your side, crying into the towel trying to muffle your anguished noises. you have the fleeting thought to think that you're overreacting, but fuck that. you’ve literally been unwillingly denying yourself for a month.
after you’ve cried yourself out, you get up and start to clean up the mess you made. when you lean down to pick up the shorts you flung across the room, you hear jimmy and sassy start yowling outside of the room. and faintly, you hear the front door open.
fuck.
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a giggle slips out of charles as the cries of the cats are heard outside of the apartment door. max shoots a glare at charles for laughing at his children, before he loses the fight and a smile slips out in response to the monegasque’s. finally managing to slip the key into the lock, max speaks, “we’re supposed to surprise her by being early, cha—maybe we should’ve let the cat’s know when we called earlier today?” they step through the threshold, quickly shutting the door behind them so the cats won’t run out. charles makes a questioning hum as they both start slipping out their jackets, “they are cats, mon minou. i do not think they care about anything other than when you come back to feed them.”
max side eyes him heavily as he squats down to untie his sneakers, and looks around slightly confused, “i think we are missing a greeting from one more kitten, wouldn't you say, charles?” the man in question nods in agreement, while finally petting jimmy and sassy to calm them down a little bit. whenever the two of them return home, you usually race to the door along with the cats. you give them warm hugs and sweet kisses, help them take their jackets off, and let them know if you cooked a meal for them, or prepared a bath. 
but tonight, they don’t hear the sound of your footsteps coming towards them. it’s rare for them not to be greeted at the door, most of the time you beat them to unlocking it, with the alarm system the cats provide. 
charles questions, “maybe she fell asleep? we did not tell her that we moved our flight earlier. and we did tell her to go to bed because we would be arriving late.”
max snorts disbelievingly, “when has she ever gone to bed when we’ve told her to,” he starts, “she’s probably just in the bathroom or something.”
the two spend a few minutes paying some attention to the cats, before they begin to get suspicious at the fact that you still haven’t come to welcome them back. they straighten up and start heading towards the bedroom. 
max pushes the door open, and everything looks normal except for the fact that you’re nowhere to be seen. the bed is put together, one nightstand lamp is on, and the bathroom is empty. max and charles stare at each other with matching baffled expressions, before you clear your throat in the doorway.
max jumps, “shit!” and charles flinches, “oh, what the fuck!”
your giggles reverberate through the air, and the two men can only laugh along with you. “oh? so you find scaring us funny, schat?” max teases gently. you pad over to him, throwing your arms around his neck to pull him in for a tight hug, nodding softly into his neck as you breathe him in. charles huffs after he’s deemed that you spent too much time loving on max before he pulls you into his own grasp, one arm braced tightly around your waist while his other hand cradles the back of your head resting in his chest. “she’s absolutely frightening, max, can’t you tell?” he teases back, defending you jokingly. 
max hums, “definitely. where were you hiding, baby?”
you freeze for second as you pull away from charles’ grasp, before stuttering your way through an explanation, “u-uh oh, i was-um, i was just in the laundry room! i was just putting a few things i had accidentally spilled uh- spilled juice on-yes juice of course, in the uh-washing machine, yes,” you nod firmly, to fully convince them.
the monegasques raises an eyebrow at you and dragged out an, “…….okay, i guess?” max follows up with a sarcastic, “yeah….we definitely believe you!”
you narrow your eyes at him, “are you calling me a liar, max? because, why would i lie about—“
charles cuts you off, turning your head back towards him as he squints at your face. he runs his thumb underneath one of your eyes, and speaks softly, “were you crying, mon ange? your eyes are red and swollen.”
you shake your head rapidly to attempt to dismiss his worry but it’s already too late. max practically teleports to your side and scans your face and with a gasp he reveals, “yes, you did cry. i can still see the tears stained on your cheeks.”
you shift uncomfortably, “yes, okay! i did cry! but it was nothing serious,” you pause and mumble the last part of your sentence, “i was just overreacting anyways, it doesn’t matter.”
max smacks his teeth at you disapprovingly, “hey, don’t be mean to yourself, schatje. anything that causes you to cry does matter. tell us, and we can try and make it better for you.” the two boys wear you down with earnest eyes; the monegasque brushes his lips against your hand comfortingly and the dutchman tucks your hair behind your ears soothingly. they wait patiently and don’t attempt to push you any further, but there’s an unspoken understanding between the two of them; they won’t let this go until you explicitly ask them two. and suddenly, your resistance falls and words start rushing out of your mouth.
“im so tired, okay? i’ve been trying for ages, ages, and i can’t get there! everytime i try, i-i-it’s like i’m right there–right there! and then it never comes! it’s torture. the harder i try to reach for it, the more it slips away, and then it doesn’t even feel good anymore! i thought this was supposed to feel good–and now what’s the point?! i don’t even wanna try again if i’m just going to be–”
“woah, woah, woah.” max cuts you off, “what are we talking about exactly, schatje? have you not been getting enough sleep or something? because we can try and–" you interrupt, “NO! i haven’t came in a MONTH! are you even listening to me?!”
charles chokes on his own breath and max damn near faints. most importantly, they’re shaken at your bluntness around the topic; every time they try to ask if you’ve been finding…relief–for lack of a better word, you tend to snap shut if they use any ‘explicit’ words with you– you tell them not to worry about it. so, to hear you say it plainly reveals how much distress this has been causing you. secondly, the thought that you’ve been desperately trying to get off for a month on your own, is a paralyzing thought. they nearly convinced themselves that you had no idea about anything sexual due to your refusal to answer any of their questions—which there would be nothing wrong with, they’d be happy to teach you how to please them and them alone. it’s a seductive thought, the fact that you’re untouched, that no man has had the opportunity to taint you and ruin your perspective on how you should receive and give pleasure. they’ve been praying for the day you’d be ready to let them teach you how to be good for them. maybe that makes them monsters, for taking advantage of your naivety and innocence, and molding you into their perfect girl, but they stopped feeling guilty for desiring this long ago. 
you seem to have missed the fact that you sent their minds reeling and continue venting, “i don’t know what to do, maxy!  i’ve been doing the same thing, and it’s NEVER failed me before. it’s cruel that it stopped working when you guys left me for more than a month! no matter how i did it–if i did the exact same things i’ve always been doing, or tried something new, nothing worked! i was literally just considering buying a fucking vibrator! a vibrator, charles, i’d rather run naked in the street than buy that online and have to put in this delivery address–”
charles gently presses finger against your mouth, shushing you. he pulls you into a deep hug, rubbing a hand up and down the length of your back , the motion pacifying you. he hums, and it vibrates through his chest to yours, “mmm, we’re home now, mon ange. there’s no need to run in the streets naked–” “definitely not,” max jumps in, reacting possessively at the implication of other people seeing you undressed. charles rolls his eyes and continues (like he’s not just as jealous as max), “or buy a vibrator. i know it must be so frustrating, to not cum,” you gasp softly, “especially when you’ve been edging yourself accidentally for so long, hm?”
a questioning sound slips from your lips, “hm? what’s edging? i just haven’t,” your voice drops to a whisper, “cum.” max thinks that he’s seriously fucked-up in the head, because he watches how you bury your face into charles’s chest after your whispered word, refusing to make eye contact with them out of embarrassment; and relishes at the fact that you absolutely have no idea about what exactly you’ve been doing to yourself. he’s going to enjoy ruining teaching you everything he knows.
“edging is repeated instances of sexual stimulation and stopping before your orgasm. it’s called that because you are kept ‘on the edge.’ you can do it to yourself or with others,” max states in an unfazed manner. he sees you start to relax, knowing that you find comfort in his matter-of-fact tone. 
a pout lowers your lips, “who would enjoy that? it feels terrible.”
max breaks out in a grin, slipping an arm around charles and squeezing at his tapered waist, “you know somebody who enjoys it very much, liefje,” charles blushes at the sudden call out, and watches the way your eyes widen in shock. max continues, “anyways, you may find that you enjoy it when it’s done properly—with people who are experienced enough to make sure you’re feeling good and keep you feeling good… and show you how to have a proper orgasm, hm?” max segways into the important topic, not allowing you to deflect any longer.
charles stops your attempt at hiding in his broad shoulder this time around, and firmly holds your face to keep you facing max. the dutch give charles a nod of appreciation and watches how he shifts on his feet at the acknowledgement; he might have to take care of him after he’s done with you, too. max allows your eyes to avoid meeting his, letting them roam his face as you battle your own insecurity.
“liefje,” max deepens his tone, knowing how you melt at any pitch similar to his morning voice, “there is no need to be embarrassed about your virginity and innocence. you had your boundaries set, and never bent or broke them to make someone happy at the cost of your comfort. no matter how much pressure someone applied to you, you refused to let them have you in one of the most vulnerable positions you could ever be in because you felt unsure or plainly uncomfortable with them. that is something you should take pride in and no one should make a joke out of your virginity for that instance. tonight, you can still make that decision if you are not completely sure on allowing charles and i the privilege of teaching you how to feel satisfied. we will continue to wait for you; you have the power here, not charles or i. do what is best for you at this moment, and if that changes, tell us so, and we will continue or stop at your will.”
the room is silent as the three of you digest max’s spiel. charles and max seem to be completely nonchalant about the matter, but they are trying to hide how anxious they are about your possible refusal, for your sake. of course they are hoping that you’ll accept their helping hands, or lips, or tongues, or coc—but, that’s not their main intention tonight. the goal is for them to start building a deeper level of understanding and trust with you, to where you allow yourself to be in your most vulnerable state with them. and that will take time; they’re not expecting you to completely reveal your innermost workings to them instantaneously. however, they most definitely want to show you how good they can make you feel and how good you can make them feel. and once you internalize that, then they can start working on showing you the wonders of sex—or plainly put, they can start tainting you.
you nod. charles eyes brighten and his cheeks dimple with the appearance of a wild smile. he leans in to kiss you in thanks, but max halts him with one finger to the forehead and a quick ‘aht aht,’ “that won’t do, liefje, i need verbal confirmation—words, please.”
“y-you can…you can help s-show and teach me how to…how to feel good. i am ready to have…,” your voice thins out, and suddenly you shake your head, eyes meeting max’s straight on in an unusual act of confidence, clearing your throat, “i am ready for us to have—i’m ready for you to fuck me.”
max wasn’t exactly ready for that wording and faltered, a little shook. charles on the other hand has to struggle to refrain from laughter. at the mixed reaction, your bravado slips away, and you add, “please?” charles loses the laugh automatically; your timid but desperate widened brown doe eyes stare up at the two of them, flickering between them anxiously, plump lips parted with your tongue flicking out—he has a few ideas of something he can offer to keep that mouth of yours busy.
max rumbles in satisfaction, “see, that wasn’t so hard, was it pretty girl? we’ll work on that confidence of yours for sure—but, i have a few rules for you first before we get started. charles, why don’t you tell our girl the first two?”
“number one, always answer our questions with words; if you don’t, we’ll stop and wait for you to respond. two, if you feel uncomfortable at any point, tell us, and we’ll stop what we’re doing and make it better for you or stop completely if necessary,” charles answers assuredly.
you nod, and max raises an eyebrow at you, “i mean, yes!”
max praises you, “you’re already doing so good for us,” he watches your breath catch at the sentence and figures he may have another praise kink on his hands, “you wanna be a good girl and tell me what you were really doing before we came home?” your cheeks burn and your previous embarrassment returns full force, but you fight through it, not wanting to break the rules right off the bat.
“well, you remember how i said my usual method wasn’t working anymore? i wasn’t lying about that. i only g-get off when you guys leave, andidoitbygrindingonapillow—and i have to put down a towel before becauseimakeamess. so! i really was doing laundry, i just didn’t spill juice on it…i kinda, spilled on it.”
charles’ hands fall away from you in shock, and max really doesn’t know if he can handle another revelation like this from you without actually passing out. you continue to over-explain, “and i i-i didn’t even get to, y’ know (oh my god, she soaked the pillow without even cumming, max!), and i got that wet anyway…and i can’t really control it, but if you guys don’t like it i can try and—“
“NO!” “PLEASE DON’T!”
you flinch away, and they apologize heavily for their overreaction.
“please, don’t, mon ange. i can tell you that max and i aren’t ever going to hate what’s between your legs, or what comes from there,” charles suggests with a smirk, before his face shifts to a more blank state “wait. did…did you have a chance to change?” you hum a little “mm-mm” glancing down at yourself still clad in max’s sweater and cotton panties, “uhm. no, i was a little more concerned with cleaning up the bed before you guys saw it so—sorry, i’m not a little more presentable—“
“are you wearing the same panties, mon ange?”
you freeze, brain lagging at what the monegasque had noticed. “mhm, yeah,” you whisper softly, playing with the hem of the sweater self-soothingly.
“can i,” charles takes a deep breath, “can i touch you, mon coeur?”
you squeak, “yes please, charlie.”
max watches as charles places his massive hand on one of your thighs, spanning the front with no struggle, and gently caresses his hand up, slowly making his way up your thigh. charles taps two fingers gently against you, and you spread your legs a smidge wider, and the sound of your thighs peeling off one another from the stickiness you leaked, reverberates around the room. max can’t help but let a moan slip out. charles slides his hand in between your legs, both of your own hands fisting at the hem of your borrowed sweatshirt, and you gasp at the lightest touch of charles pointer and middle finger against your soaked panties. max sees charles pupils blow wide and mouth drop open in awe—and he can’t wait anymore.
max presses his front to your back, sandwiching you in between them once again, and impatiently asks, “schatje, can i?” you let out a breathy ‘yeah,’ and max doesn’t hesitate to bully his hand in between your legs as well. he cops a more generous feel of your cunt, and groans at the state of ruin your panties are in.
“liefje,” max starts, “walk with me to the bed, please.” max pulls away, and unfastens one of your hands from the sweater to guide you. you turn around stumbling through your first few steps—charles sets you upright more prepared for your legs becoming jello than you are, and helps you over to the bed, one hand firmly set on the small of your back. max sits on the edge of the bed, man spreading comfortably, and watches how your eyes automatically fall to stare at his thighs with a smirk. he glances at charles behind you, who mouths ‘can’t blame her’ with a smirk of his own. the dutch pats his lap, “c’mere and give me a kiss, pretty girl.”
you rush to sit in his lap, slowing at the last minute, not wanting to sit your full weight on him. he huffs, and grabs at your hips situating you firmly on his lap, before leaning in and kissing you stupid. your gasp of shock transforms into a hum of pleasure, letting max have complete control of the kiss. his hand comes up to rest on the back of your head and moves you exactly where he wants, sucking on your bottom lip before slipping his tongue against yours. max kisses like he’s going to run out of time, he ravishes you completely. you squirm against him, pulling away to pant against his cheek needing air. max chuckles, and you only get to whine at his teasing for half a second before charles, who’s now sitting next to max, pulls you into another kiss. charles, on the other hand, kisses like he has all the time in the world, he draws it out. he keeps the kisses slow and closed in the beginning, pausing to pull away and thumb at your lips, relishing at how they’ve already swelled from max’s abuse, the surrounding skin already beginning to turn raw and sensitive from their friction of their facial hair. he continues kissing you, all tongue and sloppy not caring about about the way your hands come up to grasp at his chest in desperation, before switching to absolutely bruise your lips by nipping and tugging at them. 
your hips jump forward against max’s, and he can’t stop the groan that tumbles out. you jolt away from charles’ assault and stare at max with an embarrassed expression, “s-sorry—“ max narrows his eyes and dismisses your apology, “don’t apologize for that. you feel good, you’re allowed to show that unless i tell you differently.” 
“yes, max,” you answer, even though he didn’t ask a question.
“oh, you’re such a good girl for us, liefje,” he tests. and his instincts didn’t fail him. your hips twitch against his again, and a near inaudible moan slips from your lips.
he turns towards charles, “yeah, that works doesn’t it, cha?” charles nods, eyes still stuck on your lips. max smirks at charles being completely entranced, before turning back to you and clocks the glaze beginning to form over your eyes, “alright now, liefje, i need you to pay attention to me really quickly, hm?”
you hum, bobbing your head a few times, before you manage to get out a “yes, max.”
he holds your head steady with his thumb and pointer finger gripping your chin, “i’m not going anywhere, baby, take your time and focus.” it only takes you half a minute to truly focus in after your heart stops racing to give him another verbal confirmation before he continues. “tonight, neither one of us is going to make love to you—“ your shoulders drop and a frown is quick to spread across your mouth. you really only prepared for the situation that you’d tell them you were ready, and then you’d get railed into next sunday. you start to panic; maybe you came off too depraved, and he’s letting you down slowly—
“hey, hey, hey. no overthinking yet, let him finish, mon ange,” charles calls out to you worriedly, he’s experienced the same thought process you're going through before and would rather try and prevent the self-doubt from overtaking you.
max pets at your waist over the sweater and continues, “not tonight. we’ve just gotten off a flight, and had three back to back races. it’s late, and i’m sure all three of us are tired. we should initiate something like that with a clearer mind,” you feel a little selfish now, his points very valid, “but, i still want to give you an orgasm, okay? sure, you may not be able to get off by grinding on a pillow anymore. you’ve probably just acclimated to it and need to give it a break. so, to compromise: you’ll get off by riding my thigh.”
charles and max wait for your reaction. your frown lightens into a pout, but you’re disappointment doesn’t completely fade away. “how is that any different from riding the pillow? it’s the same thing.” charles laughs shakily, “oh, mon ange. you have no idea. listen to max and give it a try before you take it off the table completely.”
you shrug, and agree, “fine. how do i….uh how do i do the thigh riding, i guess?”
charles turns to look at max, wordlessly asking for permission, and max grants it with a wave of his hand. charles scoots up closer, and shifts your straddle from max’s whole lap to his right thigh. as soon as your pantie-covered cunt firmly presses on the muscle of max’s jean-clad thigh, a soft ‘oh’ croaks out of you. max flexes and relaxes his thigh once and your hips jump up and away from him. max and charles glance at each other; you’re ridiculously sensitive, they’ll have to see if that’s your natural state or if it’s just the result of your prolonged edging and the fact that you were grinding against a pillow not too long ago. charles squeezes your hips, bringing your attention to him, “i’m going to start guiding you now, you ready, mon coeur?”
“mmm, yeah—that felt really good, i want more,” you speak timidly.
“good,” charles states, and then he pulls your hips forward dragging you against max’s thigh, and a flash of heat zings up your spine. you moan, a small, breathy exhale, and charles keeps it slow at first, not pushing you down to roughly or making the motions too quick—he wants you to learn to love the friction again. barely a minute passes before your hips start fighting charles’ guided rhythm, and a frustrated groan slips out of you, not able to fight your boyfriends grip. max clocks back in from where he was watching the pleasure start to flicker on your face and asks, “what are you supposed to do, baby?”
“more-ah, please, charlie,” you moan shakily. charles smirks, “look at you, still using your manners like a good girl—“ a louder moan echoes, “okay, okay, mon coeur. i’ll get you there, i’ll get you to cum like you need, okay? i’ll make you forget all about your manners too, hmm?”
you stopped listening to anything after charles reassured you that he’s going to get you to cum, you believe him. he adjusts his grip on your hips and starts incrementally increasing the pace and pressure for you. your moans start to become more frequent, and increasing in pitch rapidly, the drivers can tell you’re hurtling towards your long-awaited orgasm, sooner than they thought. charles slowly releases his grip on your waist letting your hips take over once he’s sure you’ve gotten the hang of it. you throw your head back in pleasure, your hips have a steady grind and…and you’re feeling good. a suprised laugh slips out of your lips at that and shifts into a sharp moan when max starts flexing his thigh rhythmically giving you a little more texture to work with. max lets his heavy hands fill in for where charles’ and presses you down into deeper slower strokes. 
you cry out, it’s a little too much for you, but it feels so good, that you bear with it, they know what’s best for you, anyways. max grins down at you smugly, and you start to tear up a little; he can still feel your hips twitching away from the pressure sometimes. not wanting to push you too far with that motion alone, he lightens up on the pressure but starts bouncing his thigh. the shriek you release surprises all three of you, but you don’t run from it, if anything you lean into it more. one of your hands fists into charles’ shirt for support, and the other falls to max’s, tugging it off your left hip so you can hold it tight. max’s grin softens into a small smile and he kisses your joined hands, and charles leans into press kisses on your neck, praise slipping out of their lips freely.
“doing so good for us, pretty girl.”
“yeah, baby, that’s it. take what you need.”
“don’t be shy, let those sweet moans out for us.”
“just like that, oh! look at that, you’ve leaked all over his thigh,” charles points out. max looks down and registers that his pant leg is sticking down to his thigh and the denim has darkened with the amount of wetness. “oh, yeah. look at that, baby,” max pats on the side of your face, and you can’t even recall when you screwed your eyes shut, but you look down, and a mortified squeal leaves you. not much longer and you’ll have drowned his thigh. the dutchman sucks his teeth at you, “don’t be embarrassed, liefje. i can’t wait until i can taste it straight from the source,” he moves his other hand underneath the sweatshirt, and slips two fingers between your inner thigh while gathering your wetness. he sucks on one finger moaning explicitly at your taste, before offering both fingers to charles to clean off. the monegasque flicks his tongue out teasingly tasting them first, before he makes a quick motion of sucking them in and fully running his tongue in every crevice to get every last drop of your taste. 
you moans start to become pitchy little ah-ah-ah’s, and you frantically start rabbiting your hips. you’re so close. max squeezes you hand, and starts up the praise again.
“i wasn’t joking, schatje. when i finally get my mouth on your pretty little cunt, you won’t be able to pull me off of you until i force at least three orgasms out of you.”
charles pulls off of max’s fingers and adds, “i need to give her three or four from my mouth too. i don’t think she’ll be able to handle that many.”
“yes, she can. she’s such a good girl for us, she’d let us keep going until we tell her when she’s done.”
“mmm, yeah—she’s right there, look at that cute little face she’s making.”
“her pretty little o-mouth, we should fill that up for her too.”
“thinkin i’ll fill that sweet little cunt of hers first with my dick—“
what escapes your mouth is definitely a scream, and max can’t bring himself to muffle it even though it’s the middle of the night. he pays a hefty sum of money for this penthouse, they can deal with hearing how charles and him make you scream with pleasure. your orgasm completely whites-out all of your senses; ears ringing, eyes rolled back, skin feeling raw and thighs shaking. max and charles work your hips back and forth a few more times, helping you with the aftershocks until you squirm out of their hands. you fall forward into max’s chest, body trembling, and tears streaming down your face.
max cradles you close and scratches at your head, calling your name a few times to get a gauge of how out of it you are. with no verbal response, he sends charles to get water and a towel to clean you up. max softly murmurs praises at you constantly, and charles joins in with the affirmations when he returns. the both clean you up when you’re still floating; they put you in an oversized tee, not bothering with undergarments, wiping all wetness and cream away from between your legs trying to avoid looking at your cunt directly, they even manage to get your bonnet on for you, and even have time to change the duvet before you start becoming aware again.
you turn and automatically move to snuggle into the crook of max’s neck, but he gently presses a straw to your mouth so you can hydrate after the amount of fluids you seem to have lost. your eyes open, and you croak out a disapproving hum at not being able to go to sleep, and max shakes his head at you, “drink, schat. non-negotiable, pretty girl.” after slowly draining ¾ of the bottle, you pull away and with a shattered voice, start mumbling, “thank you, thank you, thank you—“
and charles leans over to cut you off with a soft press of lips, “no, thank you for letting us give you that, mon coeur.” you hum, whispering out, “i love you, charlie. i love you, maxy.” 
they both respond with resounding ‘i-love-you’s back, and start soft conversation just checking up on you before they let you fall asleep. 
“i’ve never felt this good before from an orgasm,” you start, “i wanna—i wanna keep being good for you guys. i wanna learn how to feel good like this again, and i want you both to show me how because i trust you. please?”. charles and max both murmur affirmatives to you, and you continue speaking softly, “you guys can take showers now, i’ll probably be asleep before you come back.” after making sure you’re truly comfortable, max and charles head to the en-suite to take the world’s speediest shower so they can cuddle up with you sooner. 
shutting the door, max and charles stare at each other in completely silence. charles starts, “are we sure that we’re the ones corrupting her and she’s not corrupting us? because, i’ve almost came in my pants three times tonight.”
max stares at charles with unseeing eyes, “i will never forgot the way she soaked my fucking leg, charles…i’m pretty sure i did come in my pants.”
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savingcrxws · 10 months
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eyes on fire | carmen berzatto headcanon
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carmen berzatto x ex!reader (but not for long...)
warnings. language, mentions of suicide & death (mikey)
authors note. thinking of turning this into a fic but i just wanted to get these thoughts thrown onto a page for now | EDIT 7/7: ITS A FIC! HERES PART ONE
you hated carmen berzatto, to say the least
you had been each others first s/o and spent a lot of the end of your teenage years attached at the hip
every berzatto family function (no matter how messy they always ended), every school dance, every hell's kitchen rerun--you and carmy were together
mikey liked to call you guys soulmates, watching how you and carmy just seemed to click like that- a statement that never failed to make carmy go flush in the face (que richie faking barfing in the background)
you were one of the first people that carmen told about his wishes for the future-how he wanted to take up the restaurant with his brother and continue the berzatto tradition
you loved the way his eyes lit up when he talked about cooking with his family-the way he gave his all into his aspirations
"well you gotta make sure i'm the first one to eat those fancy sounding dishes when you start working at the beef, carm"
"absolutely, babe. i wouldn't have it any other way"
however, like everyone after high school, you and carmy hit a rough patch that sunk your relationship -- you were planning to go to college for business administration and carmy was leaving chicago to go to culinary school
you two definitely attempted everything in your power to stay together-late night skype calls, daily texts, hell you even offered to fly to new york to spend time together
but the more swamped you got with school and the more carmen got slammed with cooking (especially right before he went of to Noma), the more the truth begun to show itself
the breakup was messy, because it was less a breakup and more of ...
you: what are we doing right now? like, as a couple?
carmen: i think that i need to focus more on my career right now
you: oh, so..are we breaking up right now? (read 9:57PM)
you: carmen? (read 10:15)
you: ok, asshole, be that way (delivered)
that's right, that motherfucker ghosted you
despite the tumultuous ending of you and carmen's relationship, you were still close to sugar and mikey (and, unfortunately for you, richie)
sugar was adamant on flying over to copenhagen and have a "conversation" with her brother herself + mikey and richie were not too far behind on the cause
"it's fine guys. let's just all agree that carmen is a soft little bitch" you said, trying to lighten the mood even though you knew that you were still racking thru the pain being broken up with so suddenly
you deal with the breakup harshly at first, but you put a lot of that emotion towards your own growth
fast forward a couple years, you graduated college and are on the up-and-up in chicago as a successful business marketing manager
you get closer to the berzattos, strangely, as carmy gets more distant
you don't think of carmy much anymore but it grows harder as he wins awards and recognitions in his field that honestly make you..proud, in strange way
then, mikey dies...and a lot of things change for you
you help sugar and richie plan the funeral, and something sour sinks into your stomach when you don't see that familiar head of dirty blonde hair during the service
some months pass and you try to gather yourself and get back to normal after mikey's passing
richie invites you down to the beef one day to "catch up" randomly
you go, if not to just see tina and the rest of the crew but are met with great surprise when you see him
carmen motherfucking berzatto, in the flesh, standing behind the bar yelling to richie about something nonsensical
he stops yelling when he hears the door open and literally freezes in place when he sees you
you stare at him for a second, taking in the man who once had your heart, noting the new tattoos and the new way he styled his hair and he seems to be doing the same
then, richie breaks the silence--"oh my goodness, what are you doing here, sweetheart?"
you and carmy speak at the same time
"richie, you motherfucker"
"richie, you dick"
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bettyfrommars · 4 months
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Dirty Metal Summer
a Dirty Dancing au
Part 1: Big Girls Don't Cry
Eddie x fem!Reader
MASTERLIST PLAYLIST
It's 1987, the same year the movie Dirty Dancing was originally released. 21-year-old reader is spending the summer with her dad and aunt at an all-inclusive resort in Indiana while she figures out what she wants to do with her life. After that summer, nothing will never be the same. Eddie is in his late 20’s and works as maintenance staff, he is also the frontman for the house band, begrudgingly delivering top 40 hits for the guests, and a secret third thing. When work is over, there is a completely different scene happening at a place the employees call The Hideout. Wayne is the head maintenance man, Chrissy is a metalhead, and a few other surprises. Bonus: Steve as a sexy, tattooed musician because I can't help myself.
my blog is always 18+only, MDNI please. The only warnings for the first chapter have to do with mention of a death of a parent, mention of grief, allusions to depression, a tiny bit of aggression, and alcohol consumption. But please read chapter warnings as the story progresses, because there will be angst, hurt/comfort, violence (fighting), and smut. Reader is called Bird as a nickname.
A/N: this is a rewrite of an OC fic I wrote over a year ago, and damn, I really needed to change a lot because my writing has evolved so much. I know I posted a snippet last week, but it's all been changed. Thank you to those who have been excited about this, I know Dirty Dancing is a cherished film, so I am treating this retelling with reverence, while adding some creative spins, and I truly hope you enjoy. The ST characters in this fic do not know each other in the same way they did in the show. For instance, Eddie, Steve, and Chrissy all grew up together, but I do my best to stick with their original character traits. This first part lines up very close with the film, but after that, it diverges and becomes a bit different. Same story line, but also not.
Part 1: Big Girls Don't Cry
word count: 6.3k
The soft murmur of a talk radio station hummed in the cement gray Mercedes-Benz 560, with your dad behind the wheel and his sister, your aunt Kim, in the passenger seat.  From the backseat, you stared out the window with your headphones on, wishing for rain.  The scenery was what you would expect from a place on earth that everyone considered idyllic, but you’d been exposed to so much lush greenery with that bright blue, theater backdrop of a sky for the last hour that you were starting to get a headache. 
You pushed your wayfarer sunglasses up to rub the bridge of  your nose, and then flipped the tape over in your Walkman before clicking it shut to press play.  You were listening to a mixtape you’d made especially for the trip, the spine even said “road trip from hell”, but the first one on side b was Everywhere by Fleetwood Mac, and you closed your eyes for the next several songs.  You were doing your best not to think about how you’d be trapped in BFE Indiana for a whole month.
You were also doing your best not to think about how your mother would not be home when you got back, or worse yet, the fact that you would never see her again.  Never feel her generous hugs in those Laura Ashley dresses, smelling of Shalimar; never hear her voice at the other end of the line reminding you to eat something.  
Your aunt said your name and your eyes snapped open.  It was perfect timing because tears were beginning to form at your lash line. She had turned around in her seat and was trying to get your attention.
You pulled your headphones down around your neck.  “Sorry?”
“The lake,” the expression on her face harbored more excitement than you’d ever felt in your entire life.  “Isn’t it gorgeous? We’re going to get pedicures at the spa tomorrow, I already booked it.”
You glanced at your father’s stoic profile and then back to Kim. You felt bad for your aunt, getting stuck on a trip with two sad, mopey fucks who were too depressed to get excited about the things that thrilled normal people.  You were the walking wounded.
“Pedicures, great,” your smile did not reach your eyes, but she didn’t seem to notice, as her enthusiasm doggedly refused to wane.  
It had been almost four months since you lost her, and the world was still too…bright.  Everyone was so talkative and alive and you couldn’t relate. 
You looked out over the smooth expanse of lake that was nestled perfectly in the trees like you were in some type of miniature scale model rebuild of a town.  Your aunt asked your dad, Owen, if he was still listening to the news, and when he shook his head, she changed the radio station to a golden oldies station and was satisfied with the tune Big Girls Don’t Cry by Frankie Vallie.
“You’ll love this cabin, Bird,” your dad said to you as the Mercedes crested the hill and began to maneuver down to your destination on a narrow, two-lane highway flanked with towering trees.  A big green and white sign welcomed them to Hawkins Landing.  “There’s a whole top floor where you can set up for your lessons.”
You turned away, back to the window, hiding the way your nose wrinkled.  You thought maybe a perk of this getaway would be to have a break from practicing the cello you’d been tied to for over a decade, but no luck.  He’d been forced to give up his dream of being a musician, and now you were expected to carry the torch for him.  
You tried to come up with one thing you did in life that was not to please someone else, or boost some idea they had about you, and couldn’t come up with squat.
Besides reading.  And taking long walks with music to clear your head.  Those two were yours, and they could only be taken from your cold, dead, hands.
From the Hawkins Landing brochure your aunt had given you, it was clear that the property was enormous.  Some 30 or 40 guest cabins scattered around, a main house that functioned as a hotel but also housed two different restaurants.  A golf course, boat rentals, tennis courts, an outdoor theater, and a third restaurant situated on the water.  Along with the full service spa, there were indoor and outdoor swimming pools, plus any class you could imagine wanting to take, from salsa dancing and water skiing, to chess and crochet. 
Hawkins Landing was like a camp for adults who enjoyed alcoholic beverages.
There was a security checkpoint at the main entrance with two guards inside.  The taller one with the neatly trimmed red beard recognized your father from the jacket cover on one of his many books.  Thrillers mostly, horror if you squint.  He nervously asked for an autograph, but Owen was very polite, adjusting his tortoise shell glass as he took the black marker that the guard was offering him.  
After the checkpoint, it wasn’t long before the road opened into an expansive rose garden with a large fountain dead center, and the big main house with its wrap-around porch just to the right.  You pushed your sunglasses up to get a look at the people mingling around, getting the idea that the median age there was 45, and it was mostly families.  
The guards had given your dad a foldout map of the property and told him to check in at the main house to get the keys to the cabin they were staying in. The car moved at a crawl at the roundabout, and then came to park where a sign announced new guest check-ins.  
Your dad told you to sit tight while he went in to grab the keys, and your attention trailed off to a black golf cart with a white awning that wheeled in like a racecar and took position in front of the Mercedes.  It sat there close to the curb, idling.  You could see there was a woman behind the wheel, and she was looking straight ahead, giving you her profile.  Chin length, dark gold hair, just long enough for a ponytail, and the words “Hawkins Landing Staff” written in yellow cursive on the back of her navy blue jacket.  Where her sleeve was pushed up at her elbow, you noticed some type of tattooed lettering there, and her fingernails were painted black.  
Up ahead, you caught sight of someone strolling down the sidewalk toward the car with a hand in his pocket. It was a guy with honey tipped chocolate hair styled in a pompadour with a curl that bounced at his forehead, wearing tan chinos and a maroon, button down short sleeve with the square bulge of a pack of smokes in his front pocket. A tattoo peeked out from the V of his shirt, and there was another design on his bicep. He wore a pinky ring on one hand and rolled a toothpick around in his mouth as he sidled up to the golf cart to say something to the woman driving it.  They bumped knuckles and talked for a bit like they were very familiar, him with one foot up on the running board of the cart.
“Steve, there you are,” from the open window, your attention bounced to a short, dark haired woman who’d just come out of the building and stood alongside your dad on the sidewalk.  A closer look told you that her name tag said Joyce.  
The guy with the toothpick in his mouth straightened, smoothing the front of his shirt with his hand.  “Hey Joyce, I was just—”
Apparently uninterested in what he was about to say, she took him by the crook of the arm.  She introduced you all by your family name, and let him know that you were “her special guests”, and you assumed that had to do with your dad being a famous author, or maybe she said that about every new family.  While you chose to not do much else than offer a small wave from the back seat like you had no autonomy, Kim got out to greet them properly.
“This is Steve,” Joyce gestured to him with a Vanna White hand. “If you ever want to take guitar lessons this summer, he’s one of our best.”
“Or, if you just want to have some fun,” Steve’s eyes seemed to be searching Kim’s face, and then he shrugged. “I mean, I run the boats on the dock too, so if you want to ski or—”
Kim got flustered and tried to find her words, fussing with the lapel of her corduroy jacket in a way you’d never witnessed before. “I’m…I mean, sure, who wouldn’t want to be on the lake at a place like this?”
Kim hated boats and got seasick very easily, so you found her new interest amusing.   
Joyce politely waved Steve off and he went, albeit reluctantly, backing up with slow steps to wave farewell.  The smile stretching across his face grew wider the longer Kim couldn’t take her eyes off of him. When he was finally jogging up the sidewalk to get to where he needed to be, Joyce continued to try and sell Kim and your dad on the resort, even though you were already booked for the month. 
“Sunday night is Bingo night. There’s karaoke in The Antler Room on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and you need to check out our house band if you can.  They’re playing tonight on the back patio, and the rhythm guitar is sensational.  She used to perform with Vixen and Lita Ford,” she handed over the necessary keys and pointed the way to get to the cabin on the map.  
“Just follow us,” Joyce said, hopping into the golf cart next to the girl with the forearm tattoo.  
They led the way down a long, winding stretch with lush lawn and manicured hedges on either side, littered with people coming up from the pool in their bathing suits.  There appeared to be a Tai Chi lesson happening on the lawn near the rose garden, and some type of painting class going on just above them on a balcony.  
Made you wonder why summer people always had to stay so busy.
The cabin you’d be staying in was down a side road, tucked at the end of a private driveway with a view of the lake. It had five bedrooms, which was more than enough, but one of them would immediately turn into Owen’s writing room so that he could work on his latest novel.  
You were careful to tuck your Walkman into your bag as the Mercedes coasted into its parking spot.  Squinting up at the place, you were somewhat distracted by how much you liked the creepy, old feel of the whitewashed cabin, and you underestimated how far from the curb you were when you stepped out, stumbling to the side.  
The girl with the forearm tattoo caught you in both arms, preventing you from putting all of your weight on your twisted ankle.
“Whoa,” she moved her supportive grip from your waist to your elbow as you righted yourself.  “You okay?”
Your heart shot into your throat, and then you coughed a laugh, covering your face. “What a way to start the summer.”
She said her name was Robin, and there was a polite handshake exchange. She tripped over her words a bit.  “It’s not every day that someone falls for me.”
“Well, I’m pretty clumsy, you might need to stay close,” and the two of you shared a self-conscious laugh as you led the way to the trunk full of baggage.  
When you reached in to grab your suitcase, Robin teased, “hey, that’s my job,” before leaning further in to take the oddly shaped black hard case, the satin of her jacket skimming your arm. She struggled with it at first, but then held it up by the handle and gave you a sideways look.
“This yours?” She asked, cocking one eyebrow up. “You’re a musician?”
“No, well, yes I am but no I, I play the cello,” you stammered, not sure why it was hard to get the words out. “But here, I can carry that. It’s big and heavy and—”
Robin winked.  “I got it,” and then she snatched another suitcase with the other hand and shuffled by you to make her way up to the porch.  
Once you were all settled inside and Joyce had explained all of the amenities, you and Kim pushed back the curtains and watched the two go from the living room window. Just before they took off in the cart, Robin sent you a wave.
“She looks like a nice girl,” Kim had her arms folded over her chest. “Maybe the two of you could—”
“I know you’re worried about me, okay, but I don’t need to make any friends this summer,” you were holding the case for your cello in front of you with both hands, using it as a metaphorical barrier. “I like being alone.”
By the time you put your stuff away in the bedroom you’d be staying in, your dad was already typing away in his writing room, you could hear the keys of his Selectric click-clacking.  
“I’ll be back in a bit,” you called across the rustic but spacious cabin living room.  “I’m going to look around the main house.”
Kim barely caught your words as she was struggling with her glasses to read an ingredient label as she put some dry goods away in the kitchen.  “Mhmm sounds good, have fun. Be back in time for dinner, we have reservations at…whatever that place is called. Your dad knows.”
You tapped the Swatch on your wrist and gave an absent wave over your shoulder.
With your headphones on, you made your way down to the main sidewalk that split off in two directions, bordering either side of the swimming pool and tennis courts.  You found the bike path that wound down along the lake to the boat dock, and then up into a lush pocket of dense forest.  Two teenage girls on rollerblades almost crashed into you as they bolted around the bend, giggling.  Trying to decide if you wanted to go toward the water or into the woods, you watched a staff member veer off onto an uneven stone pathway and your curiosity was piqued.
Creeping along in their wake, you marched up a hill for what felt like forever, with Bring on the Dancing Horses by Echo and the Bunnymen playing in your ears, until you realized with a start that you’d already arrived at the main building.  It loomed up ahead like a mansion from some old gothic romance novel. 
You continued to plod your way along the trunks of trees, until you spotted a group having a chat on the wide porch, and took a few steps back.
They were all leaning against the railing in a semicircle, facing each other,  so that you could see the Hawkins Landing Staff on the back of a few of their navy jackets.  
One of them was Steve from earlier, next to him was a girl with a blonde ponytail, and then two others.  
“I met that author guy today,” Steve took a drag and then blew the smoke up in the air, away from everyone’s face.  “The one who wrote Darkness on the Hill, that one they made into a movie.”
You realized that it was your dad he was talking about. 
Not looking where you were stepping, you caught your toe on a tree root and your arms windmilled before you were able to find your balance, floundering to duck behind another tree.  Your mouth opened in a silent scream, trying not to gasp at the pain in your foot.  Grimacing, you turned the volume down on the headphones that were around your neck to better hear what they were saying.
“That actor from that one show about law and order is staying in cabin 8,” the girl with the ponytail said.  “Housekeeping says he finishes a bottle of whiskey a night.”
But then, there was another voice. “Now that sounds like a great fucking vacation to me,” followed by the heavy footfalls of boots on wood as a new person approached the group.
The sight of the new arrival made you feel like your brain was wiped clean—-the whole world came to a screeching halt.
Swallowing hard, all of your attention tunneled on him; his long dark hair with bangs that crowded his eyes, a thin but muscular build, tattoos scattered over his exposed arms, and a leather jacket hooked over his shoulder with one finger. He combed a hand through his hair as he walked, chunky metal rings catching the light, and headed over to the blonde girl.  You took note of every movement as she passed him her half-smoked cig and he gave her a quick kiss on the temple.  
Was that his girlfriend?
He stepped back to introduce the younger guy he had with him.  “This Jamie, my new maintenance trainee,” he used the hand holding his smoke to point to each one on the balcony individually.  You really didn’t pay attention until he got to the blonde one.  “...that one there is the lovely Chrissy, and the moody one with the hairy chest is Steve.  They’re the other musicians I told you about.”
Jamie had short black, curly hair and a hoop piercing in one ear.  He lit his own smoke while the metalhead started in with a story about a pump exploding at the pool house, complete with wild hand gestures.  
“Hey, there the fuck you are.  I’ve been looking everywhere for you losers.”
Another voice, another person making their way down the long stretch of squeaky wood planks from the front of the building.  You stepped closer, snapping a twig under your foot, eliciting a worried lip bite.
Everyone stayed right where they were, but for Eddie who moved in front of Jamie in a protective way.  The guy approaching at a stroll had very nondescript good looks with his wheat blonde hair in a tight cut that looked freshly trimmed.  While the others were dressed more casually, this one wore a white dress shirt and tie with black trousers, as if he had some fancy place to be.
“You talking to me?” The metalhead flicked his cigarette ash and stepped forward to meet the new guy before he could come any closer to the group. “Cause, if so, you might want to change your tone, precious.”
“Eddie, don’t,” Chrissy said, and then she stood up, addressing the guy in the suit.  “Jason, what the fuck do you want?”
Eddie, you moved your lips, whispering the name to yourself.  His name was Eddie.  
Jason put his hands up in mock surrender.  “Why so hostile?” He turned to Eddie. “Joyce has been trying to find you for an hour.  There’s a toilet backed up in one of the cabins, and trash that needs to go to the dump. Sounds to me like you’re having a hard time doing your job, Munson.”
You scuttled like a crab, moving to a spot where you could see their faces instead of the backs of their heads.
So that you could see Eddie’s face. 
Steve checked his watch and pushed off of the railing to snub his cig out on the bottom of his shoe.  “I gotta run.  See you bastards at the show tonight,” he said in passing, shoving both hands into his trouser pockets.  He walked right into Jason, shoulder checking him, before casually going on his way.  Jason shot him an evil look.
“Well,” Eddie took a deep breath. “Tell Joyce I got the message,” and then he motioned for Jamie to follow him.
“Too bad we can’t take you out with the rest of the trash, freak,” Jason mumbled, loud enough for you to hear every word, and a tension crackled in the air.
The metalhead stopped dead in his tracks and drew his shoulders back.  
When he finally turned on his heel, he wore a satisfied smirk, inclining his head, as if he’d been waiting for Jason to say something all along. 
Chrissy moved as if she were about to go over and break up whatever was about to happen, but one of the others put a handout and stopped her.�� 
“Just keep sending your laundry home to mommy, baby boy, and leave the real work to me,” Eddie said, and then he flicked the butt of his cigarette at Jason’s face. 
Jason moved his head just in time so that the hot cherry missed his cheek by a hair and bounced off the wall behind him, spraying sparks.  Chrissy and the others snickered at how beet red Jason’s face got, but he didn’t say another word, he just waited for Eddie and Jamie to be far enough away before he went back around to the front entrance.
When the coast was clear, you stood and made your way to the path again.  With a curse you realized you were going to be late for that dinner reservation, and picked up speed to a slow, sad jog. 
You found yourself thinking that maybe being trapped at Hawkins Landing for the summer wouldn’t be so bad after all. 
—----
Your aunt Kim gave you an exasperated look when you all finally sat down for dinner, being that you’d made everyone 20 minutes late for the reservation.  There didn’t appear to be a single open table when you arrived, but Joyce had made sure to keep the one by the window facing the gardens open for your party.  She came around to introduce the guy who was to be your waiter, and you sat up a little straighter in your seat when you realized it was Jason from earlier.  The way he’d been dressed out on the porch made sense now, as his uniform was the same as all of the other waitstaff.  
Near the end of the meal, Joyce returned to the table in her black pencil skirt and fitted jacket, but this time, she was with a guy who you could tell wanted to look like Don Johnson in Miami Vice, but it came off more as Gary from Weird Science.  
“I'd like you to meet Troy, he’s the son of Mr. Brenner, the owner of the resort,” there was a reluctance about her, as if she’d been forced at gunpoint to introduce him.  
Troy stared at you with an uncomfortable intensity, making your attention fall to your plate.  
“I’m in charge when my father isn’t around,” Troy said with a smug grin, putting his hands in his white trouser pockets, and you spotted some type of metal retainer on his teeth.  
Joyce cleared her throat, annoyed that his statement was far from true.  But she recognized that it was part of her job to indulge the little shit.  
“I just graduated with a business degree from Georgetown,” he gloated, giving you a wink.  “This place will all be mine one day.”
Your father exchanged a look with your aunt over his chocolate mousse.  
“Well, it’s nice to know someone else your age here, isn’t it, Bird? Maybe you two kids should go have some fun tonight,” Kim chirped.  
If your aunt wasn’t so far away, you would’ve kicked her under the table. 
Troy bent at the waist so that his face wasn’t far from yours.  “I’d love to show you around after dinner, if you’re interested in a tour?”
Before you could issue a vague excuse like, “sorry I can’t, I have a headache,” Kim spoke for you again.
“I think that’s a great idea,” she even clapped her hands, applauding it. 
In the end, you went with him to make Kim happy, to get her off your back, hopefully for the rest of the trip.  
An hour or two with a pretentious prick wouldn’t hurt you.
—-------
Troy wasn’t bad company, but he was quite full of himself.  He had interesting stories about his extensive travels, but then he also told awkward stories that were possibly fibs about how many models he’d dated, and expanded on how he wanted to be married with two kids by the time he was 30.   
You, on the other hand, couldn’t imagine thinking that far ahead, and he wouldn’t let you get a word in edgewise.  
You followed close behind through the huge, busy kitchen of the restaurant you’d just dined in, and he tried to hold your hand when he introduced you to the head chef, but you were sly, and pulled it away to cross your arms over your chest.  He gave you a tour of the ballroom and took a stroll through the other restaurant on the opposite end of the building that had a much more relaxed feel, low lighting, red carpet, and a bar at the center.  
You went down to the boat docks and walked along the pier. The stars were breathtaking, but Troy didn’t notice, he was too busy trying to convince you to go out on his boat with him.  You declined, taking a page from Kim’s book to mention a freshly born curse of violent seasickness.  
You had your elbows on the railing at the pier, enjoying the velvet reflection of the crescent moon in the lake, and you could feel your jaw grow tense under the weight of Troy’s stare. 
On the verge of telling him you were ready to head back to your cabin, the sound of music drifted down from somewhere on the property. 
Yes, no mistaking, it was Take Me Home Tonight by Eddie Money, but it was being executed with someone else’s voice, and whoever that person was had some serious pipes.
And then there was the distinct sound of a feminine voice chiming in with the parts from the song Be My Baby Now by the Ronettes in the chorus.
"Is that a live band?" You turned away from him to try and find the source of the music.  It wasn’t coming from the restaurant on the water or any of the cabins to your right.  
"There's a cover band every Friday out behind the main house. You want to check it out?" He held the crook of his arm out to you and hesitated before you took it.  His ego sufficiently stroked now that you wanted to spend more time with him.
Around the side of the building, overlooking the golf course, was a huge, fenced in back patio garden area with a private hot tub and pool for hotel guests.  Troy led you through a white arbor wound with ivy to find that there were plenty of people mingling, drinking, and dancing.  The area was mostly manicured lawn, with stone pathways meandering around from a concrete floor that was right in front of the small riser that was meant to be a stage. You imagined that a million weddings had taken place there. 
At the door was a bar, and Troy got you a flute of champagne, which you downed with abandon and asked for another.  While he was getting your second glass, you made your way along under several boughs of white string lights to get a view of the stage and who was performing the top tier Eddie Money cover.
Just as you stepped into the crowd of people shuffling to the beat, you stopped dead in your tracks.
There he was at the mic: Eddie the metalhead.
Guitar slug low at his hips, wearing a tuxedo with light blue cummerbund and bow tie, his hair neatly combed back and fixed into a knot at the back of his head so that you could really see the curves of his face. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was performing the song against his will.
The rest of the band were dressed similarly, and you instantly knew the one strumming the bass guitar as Steve, and the woman on backup vocals rocking on the rhythm was Chrissy, who wore a conservative skirt and flats. There was also a keyboardist and a drummer, both of whom you did not recognize.
“What’s your major?” Troy asked, breaking your reverie to pass you the glass of champagne. “In college?”
You were confused for a second but then, “oh, I took the year off to…figure some things out.” The full truth of it was that you had dropped out completely and had no intention of going back.  
“I spent a summer in Greece my freshman year,” he offered, unprovoked. “The women there are, wow, so smoking hot.”
The song finished and Eddie took his tuxedo jacket off, rolling up his shirt sleeves to his elbows, exposing the scattered tattoos you’d noticed earlier.  He leaned over to whisper something to Chrissy, motioned at the drummer, and then stepped back into place, brushing a loose wisp of hair off his cheek.
“Find someone special for this next one,” he told the crowd, and was answered with a rush of murmurs.
The first notes to In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel, a slow song, lit up the space, and your stomach tightened, fearing that Troy would ask you to dance. As he escorted you to the floor, you tried to keep your head down and stay to the back of the crowd, but Troy kept maneuvering you closer to the stage. 
I get so lost, sometimes
Days pass and this emptiness fills my heart
When I want to run away
I drive off in my car
But whichever way I go
I come back to the place you are
You watched the performance from over Troy’s shoulder and followed his lead, shifting from foot to foot.  You were mesmerized by the muscles in Eddie’s hands as he played each note, and the way Chrissy came in like an angel on the chorus.  
He’d captured the attention of everyone in the garden at that moment, and there was a group of women watching him from the sidelines, whispering to each other, possibly about how they wanted to eat him alive.
They were all thinking the same thing you were: Eddie was magic.  
He liked to close his eyes when he sang, so you weren’t expecting him to be staring right at you when he opened them again.  
All my instincts, they return
And the grand facade, so soon will burn
Without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside
He wouldn’t break eye contact, so you eventually had to; the intensity of it was giving you butterflies.
Troy stepped back and tried to get your attention.  “Did you hear anything I just said?”
You nodded, but your gaze only drifted back to Eddie.  Troy followed your line of sight and then dropped both of his hands with a frustrated cluck of his tongue.
"What the hell is he doing up there?" He hissed to himself when it dawned on him that Eddie had been behind the mic that whole time. "That's our goddamn maintenance guy. He shouldn't be up there."
In a huff, Troy pushed through the crowd and headed over to one of the other staff members against the fence. Bird could see him shouting and pointing over at the stage. Whatever the staff guy said did not seem to cheer him up a bit, and he came back to your side, shrugging his shoulders.
"I guess our normal front man Drew has the flu," he reported back. "It's just so hard to find reliable help these days."
Eddie was making the song his own, and that was what you liked about it.
“Let’s get out of here,” Troy put his hand on your lower back to escort you out. “The music sucks.”
—--
It was 9:30 when you made it back to the main foyer, standing in the middle of the lobby next to an obnoxious floral arrangement, when Troy tried to get you to go back to his cabin and watch a movie, only to get respectfully declined.
“Don’t worry about your parents,” Troy said, brushing his finger over your chin. “They know you’re with me, so they’re probably the happiest parents at Hawkins Landing.”
The guy had quite an ego on him, you had to give him that. It was unsurpassed by most. 
In the end, you got away, and as soon as your Mary Jane’s hit the cobblestones outside the front door, you could feel yourself trotting at a quicker pace, eager to put some distance between you and Troy and everyone else, for that matter.  You didn’t stop until you were far enough away from the main hotel to be able to check over your shoulder and not see it through the trees.
It was then that you realized that you had a free chunk of time, and you could do with it whatever you wished.  Your dad would think you were still with Troy, and as long as you made it back to the cabin before midnight, they wouldn’t worry.  
As much as it was the dead of summer, Indiana by the water had very cool nights, and you buttoned up the jean jacket you were wearing just as you noticed a yellow sign on a lamppost to the right that said: Staff Quarters, No Guests Allowed Beyond This Point
And that made you want to venture in even more.
You checked around to make sure there was no one there to notice that you blatantly ignored the sign, and just kept going.  The path at your feet changed from stone to a well-worn dirt path through the grass, and it wasn’t long before you could hear the sound of music erupting in the distance.  
You passed by staff quarters, a few weathered red cabins with white trim, lined close together, and there were some people hanging out on their porches who gave you curious looks, but didn’t seem too concerned with your presence. 
Following the source of the music, you descended down into unknown, poorly lit territory that no longer looked like it was part of the Hawkins Landing property.  
(song playing in the distance is Dangerous Meeting by Mercyful Fate)
It was then that you noticed a pale yellow light coming from the windows of a building up ahead.  Just as the dirt path turned to gravel, you identified the music you were hearing as heavy metal, and it was bolstered by distinct shouts and cheers, even a high-pitched scream or two.  
“Hey,” a voice startled you from out of the dark and you jumped. “What are you going out here?”
Heart racing, you spun around to find out it was Robin.  
She was struggling to carry several things in her arms as she walked and you rushed over to her.
“Where did you come from?” You asked, grinning ear to ear at how glad you were to see someone familiar.
“My cabin is right over there,” she bucked her chin in a direction behind you.
She had a crossbody bag over her shoulder, an amp in one hand, and she was juggling two guitar cases, one of which she fumbled, and you managed to catch it before it hit the ground.  You wrapped your arms around the hard case with the Scorpions sticker on it, silently offering to carry it the rest of the way.
“You don’t have to—” Robin started, adjusting the bag over her shoulder.
“I want to,” you looked back up at the house where the music was coming from, assuming that was where she was headed.  “I carry that big cello around all the time, remember? I’m used to it.”
Robin moved her jaw from side to side and she looked conflicted.  “You’re not supposed to be here.”
Your eyes were still locked on the house hidden in the trees.  “What is that place?”
“Listen,” she gave you an imploring look. “I will get in so much trouble if they find out you came out here. Your dad won’t want you here, trust me.”
Her warning did nothing to squelch your curiosity. “I’m a big girl, I go wherever I want. Plus, I won’t tell anyone.”
“Besides,” she gave you a knowing look, raising her eyebrow. “If your boyfriend Troy finds out you were here, Brenner will fire all of us.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” you snapped.  But then, softer, you added, “I barely just met him tonight.”
Robin wasn’t in the mood to try and rip the guitar out of your hands, and so, with a heavy sigh, she caved.
“Fine,” she sighed. “But stay close to me, okay? You’re not at the resort anymore, sweetheart.”
You nodded, waiting for her to lead the way.
She took a step forward and then stopped and turned on her heel to point at the instrument in your arms. 
“Be extra careful with that, it’s Eddie’s baby. He’ll grow horns if anything happens to it.”
----
Hi! If you are familiar with the movie Dirty Dancing, you have an idea about what scene is coming up next. I've really enjoyed lining up certain events with the movie, but things will obviously be different in this because I want it to have some surprises in store for you.
Every chapter from here on out will start with a list of the songs, ones that will give hints for what to expect. I wanted to make music a big part of this fic, because it was a huge deal in the movie, and the original soundtrack is still dear to me.
as always, thank you so much for reading and interacting with this story! Comments and reblogs are deeply appreciated. or send me an ask and let me know what you think ❤️
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taglist: @tlclick73 @micheledawn1975 @kurdtbean @katethetank @elvendria @spookysqaush86 @somethingvicked @stylesxmunson @laurenlokirby @sapphire4082
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as the flowers bloom, my heart does too ⋆*·゚misa rodriguez x putellas!reader, social media au, (3/5)
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when your relationship ends and all you want to do is hide and cry, flowers suddenly start to appear on your doorstep.
or; misa hating to see a pretty girl cry and suffer and going out of her way to cheer her up while staying anonymous
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yourusername: desperately trying to disappear ✌️ Liked by alexiaputellas, albaps9, bff3 and 638 others
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bff1 now that's a waste of a good drink bff1 but i'll make you a better one and then we can cry and watch your favourite movie and bake cookies or play cards. tell me when and i'll be there 😘 liked by yourusername
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bff2 ❤️💔 bff2 Keep holding on, and don't forget you have us! We're only a phone call away. Shout and we'll come. liked by yourusername
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alexiaputellas You deserve el todo mundo 😘 alexiaputellas Can we come over, laelia? Alba, mami and I? Seen alexiaputellas Yn? Delivered
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albaps9 don't let that shit have this much power over you again, please hermanita ): albaps9 and if she contacts you again, you tell me, okay? albaps9 pls think about yourself. don't let her words get to you. i know you've been talking to someone new lately. don't throw away something that could be beautiful just because of past experiences. albaps9 if you want me to stay with you again for another few days, i'm there within the hour albaps9 answer your phone or i'm coming over albaps9 nvm, coming over anyway with mama and ale. albaps9 we love you, okay? albaps9 and maybe you're the toughest putellas after all albaps9 ❤️ Seen
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↳ 1min ago: yourusername added to their close friends story ↳ 56secs ago: yourusername added to their close friends story ↳ 44secs ago: yourusername added to their close friends story ↳ 10secs ago: yourusername added to their close friends story
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marisabel_rguez: Friends and football, the two best distractions 😁 Liked by leilaouahabi, jennihermoso, alexiaputellas and 18,993 others
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leilaouahabi Oh, so I'm a distraction now? How kind 🤪 ↳ marisabel_rguez Only the best! ↳ leilaouahabi I'll take that compliment. So are you.
jennihermoso Big win, good times 👏💓 ↳ marisabel_rguez 😁🤟
alexiaputellas 😎 liked by marisabel_rguez
haleyraso Aha! So that's why your game has been off lately! 😂😇 ↳ haleyraso Kidding ❤️ liked by marisabel_rguez
sofie.svava Princess!! (the strongest I know) 😇 liked by marisabel_rguez
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tagged: yourusername bff3: Proud of this little one. She's taking life by the horns and showing it who's boss. Liked by alexiaputellas, bff2 and 347 others
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yourusername i love you. all the days serving douchebag drunk tourists and living off tips was so worth it bc it brought you into my life. ↳ bff1 into OUR lives 🥹🥹 ↳ bff3 Even worth serving Arrogant Alex for every weekend for four months? ↳ yourusername omg i'd nearly forgotten about him!!! yikes, but yes. all worth it. ↳ bff3 You forgot Arrogant Alex but not Silly Sander? But same ❣️ ↳ bff2 Even I remember him 😂 ↳ bff1 'you'd never have to work in this lousy shithole if you were mine' ↳ bff3 Then proceeded to visit said lousy shithole every following weekend. ↳ bff2 Capturing hearts since 1998 and 1993💋
alexiaputellas 😍
bff1 you're doing great sweetie xoxo
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tagged: yourusername bff1: claimed this one the second i walked into kindergarten one unsuspecting morning and she, the NEW GIRL, had the audacity to be playing with my favourite plushies. never looked back since. thank you, universe. Liked by albaps9, alexiaputellas, bff2 and 508 others
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bff3 Adorable!!
albaps9 she always cried at home before going, then cried when she had to go home after she met you jajaja ↳ bff1 i have that effect 😇 ↳ albps9 i still think you're the reason she's no longer shy and innocent 😡 ↳ bff1 you're so welcome!
bff2 My favourite chaotic girls! 🤗
alexiaputellas Go back to being this little @/yourusername 😔 liked by yourusername
yourusername going from sharing plushies to sharing the best moments of my life! ↳ bff2 For a second I was worried you were going to say undies 😭 ↳ bff1 won't fit, my butt's bigger than hers ↳ yourusername no way!! ↳ bff1 to the undies or the butt? ↳ yourusername yes 👼 ↳ bff1 yes to what?? liked by yourusername
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tagged: yourusername bff2: Watch out world, she’s coming for you. Now stronger than ever! ❤️ Liked by marisabel_rguez, bff3, albaps9 and 123 others
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yourusername ❤️ ↳ bff2 ❤️ ↳ bff3 ❤️ ↳ bff1 ❤️
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marisabel_rguez: Going to make Sevilla unsafe 😛 Liked by sofie.svava, frejaolofssonn, marialeonn16 and 12,493 others
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sofie.svava and unsafe we made it! ↳ marisabel_rguez 😉
carolinemoller_ My bank account is still weeping 🤪
atheeneeaa_10 Girls! 💜
username1 i miss yn in here liked by 12 others
claudia.zornoza 😍
carolineweir95 Missing you all!
username2 Is it me or is misa really inactive lately, she's changed ↳ username3 Not just you ): ↳ username2 And her game has been so off lately, ngl
haleyraso You better return to us all smiley again after this trip!!! 😤
frejaolofssonn hey who's that one in the back? she's looking goooood. liked by marisabel_rguez
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yourusername: i guess i'm back. (well, i'll try to stick around) Liked by marialeonn16, alexiaputellas, esmeebrugts and 3,489 others
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username1 we missed you!!!!!!
ingridengen ig's not the same without our princesa 🤩
username2 Hello againnnn
bff1 two/three whole months? without posting? record. but i missed you. ↳ yourusername i missed me too ☹️ ↳ bff1 😘
ona.battle Now we had you all to ourselves for a little while 😝 ↳ salmaparalluelo whoop whoop 🙌 liked by yourusername
albaps9 eyes on the road, chica, or have you forgotten when you messed up your foot while biking to school??? liked by alexiaputellas ↳ alexiaputellas The one day she had to go alone and boom 😆 ↳ yourusername so nice to see you making fun of my messed up and bloodied foot. it really hurt and i was alone and panicking and had to bike back home in pain 😔 ↳ ablaps9 i mean, i'm sorry for laughing but WHO the hell wears chanclas while biking? WHO?! a safety hazard!! ↳ alexiaputellas An eight year old 🤷‍♀️ ↳ yourusername they were my favourite pair of havaianas, i wanted to look cute 😞 ↳ albaps9 mom was right to whoop your ass with them later ↳ alexiaputellas At least now you have a cool scar 😎
bff3 Good to have you back, babe! Ps, you left your sweatshirt at our place. ❤️ ↳ yourusername keep it company for me until tuesday <3 ↳ bff1 just don't go and cook a curry with it on, like last time ↳ bff3 If you hadn't turned the stove higher behind my back, none of it would've splattered! ↳ bff1 didn't want it to take an hour longer. i was hungry. ↳ bff3 Well, not going to wear it while cooking. It's the green adidas one, btw, your favourite, so I wouldn't dare. ↳ yourusername ahh. well, i think green's your colour anyway, keep it 😘
username3 Welcome back 👋
username4 FINALLY
username5 now misa has to come back too 🤞 ↳ username4 Here's to hoping this post will do just that
username4 no more misa/yn interactions? this girlie is very sad ↳ username1 Don't think that's happening anymore 😪 ↳ username5 yeah, between the radio silence, stories and off-behaviour, i don't think so either ↳ username3 well, that doesn't have to be bc of misa? ↳ username6 no u-haul? 😢 ↳ username1 No U-haul.
begovargas Loved spending time with you. We should do it again soon 😌 ↳ yourusername I'm so down!! Miss you already! 🫶
marialeonn16 Did you eat any more good pasta by any chance? ↳ yourusername YES, and also discovered this new cute restaurant. i'll text you the place. liked by ingridengen
janafernandez3 Hey chica 😻 liked by yourusername
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↳49min ago: yourusername added to their close friends story
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5min ago: marisabel_rguez just added to their close friends story ↳ This story is no longer available
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yourusername hey ↳ marisabel_rguez Hey
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a/n to anyone reading this, i hope you have a lovely day. 🌼🥰
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sbdskate · 3 months
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Laws Of Attraction (Part 9) - DR x lawyer!fem!reader
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Summary: McLaren is in breach of contract, dr3 hires a lawyer to deal with the aftermath. Tropes ensue. Slow burn. Enemies(kind of) -> Friends/colleagues -> Lovers
Pairing: lawyer!fem!reader x Daniel Ricciardo
Warnings : fluff and cheese, language, slight angst, alcohol consumption
Word Count: 3,866
A/N: One day I may be one of those writers who is well organized and has a preplanned schedule for posting, but unfortunately (and as my first fic), today is not that day. Thank you for your patience during this writing drought. Another chapter will be on the way after this, hopefully in a couple of weeks after another round of edits. Shout out to @cutelittlefakejourneys for your help. As always, thank you for reading and don't be a ghost reader!
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Epilogue 1
Daniel Ricciardo had been in your room last night. After a long race day filled with anxiety, media, McLaren, and subsequently relief and pride, he had stolen a bottle of champagne from McLaren’s afterparty, and your heart. He had hesitantly conditioned the gift on being consumed after the signing and delicately suggested you share the bottle, evidently afraid he would tear the fragile string that connected the two of you since the beginning. But you didn’t want to wait, so you had invited him in.
“So that’s how you open a bottle without spilling half of it?”
“What can I say, I’m a woman of many talents. Would you feel more comfortable if I gave you one of my heels to drink out of?” He laughed.
“Nah, not dirty or sweaty enough.”
He looked around to see what you had made of your private space. In contrast to the crisp outward appearance you presented as you strutted through the paddock in your tailored suits, your hotel room was a mess. Laptop open, papers spread out over every surface. Your petite figure was dwarfed by the oversized, plush hotel robe. Behind closed doors he realized you were quite ordinary. Not that you were unremarkable, but in the sense that you were perfectly imperfect.  
“What are we toasting to?”
“To finish lines.”
You started out at least trying to be prim and proper, using the hotel’s water glasses as vessels. But at a certain point decorum went out the window and you simply passed the bottle between you sitting cross legged on the floor. Even though it was late, the hours passed like sand through an hourglass.  
“Biggest celebrity crush growing up?”
“Leonardo DiCaprio. Easy. Man has been attractive literally at all stages of my life, from the time I was six watching ‘Growing Pains’ to now. Dude aged like fine wine. Unfortunately though I’ve aged out of his dating pool.”
He observed your lips wrap around the mouth of the bottle, how small your hand looked holding it, and his imagination ventured to unclean places.
“You?”
“Josh Allen,” he said without skipping a beat.
“You were five when Josh Allen was born. I know he’s your boyfriend but that doesn’t count.”
“Fine, fine, fine. I might have had a poster of Kylie Minogue in my bedroom when I was like, twelve.”
The two of you sat side by side at the foot of the bed, your hands inched closer towards one another as the night dwelled on.
“If you could do anything in the world, if money didn’t matter, what would you do?”
“Eh. I think I’d still be a lawyer.” He snorted.
“That’s the biggest fucking lie I’ve ever heard.”
“What? Someone’s gotta do it.”
“Come on. Do you actually love this? You’ve been away from your life in the States for months. And for what?”
“Well, I got to travel the world, meet cool celebrities… I got to know you. That must count for something, right?”
You tried to deliver the earnest statement as casually as possible, hoping he wouldn’t read too much into it. But the heft of your words hung in the air and blended with the little popped champagne bubbles that had evaporated. After months of Daniel tormenting you with flirty comments, it was his turn to try to ignore your flattery.
“Really. Money’s no object. Any job in the world. Go.”
“Ok ok fine. I suppose - Oh I don’t know… Maybe I’d be a food critic. I love to eat, I like to complain, and I like writing, so I feel like that’s the perfect marriage of all those things. Or… maybe I’d just drop off the grid completely. I’ve always dreamed about running off to the rolling hills of Italy and living off the land, maybe I’d open a flower shop or something. Really just live out my Under the Tuscan Sun fantasy. But it’s silly. I’ve worked so hard to get to where I am, I could never imagine throwing it all away.”
“It’s not silly.”
Your sideways glance met his deep pools of dark ember, filled with sincerity. You took a swig of champagne and passed the bottle back to him, wishing to wash away the palpable chemistry that swirled around you.
“What about you?”
“I guess I’d still be doing this.” You frowned, sensing his timidness.
“That’s not fair, you made me pick something.”
“Come on, it’s not like I have any transferable skills. I don’t know what else I could do.”
“You literally have two side hustles already. Wine maker and fashion mogul don’t do it for you?”
You thought you could crack a smile out of him, but instead the corners of his mouth downturned slightly.
“It’s not the same. We already decided the second time we met I could never have a desk job. I’m an adrenaline junkie, I’ve always needed to be in a car. Plus my parents worked hard to get me here, to get those opportunities for me, and seeing them happy makes me happy. I don’t know what else there is.”
“Your mother has a small heart attack every time you race.” You tried to placate his uncertainty, but the light conversation had turned heavy and there was no undoing it.
“Oh, that’s neither here nor there,” he brushed off.
“What about all the cameras constantly in your face? Don’t you miss being anonymous?”
This seemed to make him pause.
“I do… but at the same time, part of the fun was getting to make a name for myself. I’m not sure I fully knew what I was getting myself into, but I knew that fame came with the territory if I was actually good at what I was doing. Do I miss being able to walk down the street or go to a restaurant without being bombarded? Yeah for sure. But even when I had that, I don’t think I enjoyed it because I was always trying to get to the next step.” He paused, the furrow in his brow coming undone. “Do I love it right now in this very moment? No. I need a fucking break. I think you corporate people call it ‘burnout’ or whatever. But I’ve loved it up until now, and I know I’ll love it again eventually. I really can’t imagine doing anything else.”
The space between your fingers had vanished. As though your extremities had a mind of their own, you both looked down to study how they folded over one another. There was no recoiling. Your hand, that apparently had its own free will, sent signals to you to look up again. It was ironic that you had partially declined his invitation to the McLaren afterparty because you were afraid of winding up in a situation that vaguely resembled something exactly like this. Tomorrow was so close yet so far, and your wherewithal to resist the magnetic pull between the two of you was at an all time low. Over the last week leading up to the final race, flashbacks of the kiss in Brazil replayed on a loop in your mind. If you blinked you would’ve missed it when it had happened in real time. But the memory teased you and champagne was buzzing through your veins, clouding your judgment. You wanted to explore. Like a moth to a flame, you began leaning in, your eyes fluttering as his lips went in and out of focus.
Instead of being met with Daniel’s embrace, you toppled over as he got to his feet.
“Champagne’s gone, guess that’s my cue for bed.”
You propped yourself on your elbow as you looked up at him incredulously. How much champagne had you had, that you had so badly misread the situation? You averted your gaze in embarrassment.
“Yes, I suppose you’re right.”
His extended hand came into view. You slowly looked up again, his warm and inviting eyes conveying more than words ever could. You cautiously accepted his help as he got you to your feet, his strong hold steadying you.
“Do you need any help in the morning?” Yeah, just avoid Daniel until it’s over so you don’t lose your job. That would probably be a good start.
“No, I’m good, thanks though. Do you need any help?”He laughed, mostly out of astonishment that you could possibly ask such a question when you had already done so, so much.
“Yeah, if you could just sign for me too that would be great.” You rolled your eyes and shoved his arm. “Get some rest, yeah?”
And then he was gone. But how could you possibly just get some rest? You tossed and turned, never quite falling into a deep slumber. The scene of two friends on the floor sharing champagne and secrets played over and over. Friends? Colleagues? Business partners? Something else?
It festered as you got ready, before even the sun was up. The tried and true pink suit felt like it might burst at the seams, unable to contain the palpitations in your chest - a concoction of anticipation, nerves, anxiety, and excitement.
-
It was strange, having such a momentous deal take place outside the confines of a grandiose conference room with a dramatic, long, mahogany table overlooking some city skyline and perhaps a beautiful, shiny body of water. It was a status symbol of Big Law, the firm’s ability to peacock to clients how successful they were. The bigger the room and better the view, the more deserving they were of that outrageously high retainer fee they charged.
Instead, you walked into what was left of Red Bull hospitality after the big, final race weekend. Of course it was sleek and modern in its own right, but it gave an air of approachability that was lacking at the firm’s office. Nonetheless, you tried to import formality back into the space. You had printed and made matching binders of copies of the agreement for everyone present, appropriately tabbed and color coordinated. You brought blue, black, and red pens, highlighters, sharpened No. 2 pencils, and legal pads with the firm’s name emboldened at the top. You had gotten to Red Bull early to set up the space yourself, so that all materials were spaced out accordingly for each chair at the table. You took a step back to admire your handy work. Yes, this would do just fine.
Your phone went off.
DR: Where are you? We’re going to be late.
Y/N: I’m already here.
DR: 🙁
DR: You didn’t wait for me?
DR: It’s going to be weird walking there without you.
Y/N: I figured you wouldn’t want to be over an hour early and you could use the extra sleep. I’m sure you’ll manage.  
-
It was weird for Daniel walking to the paddock without you. The whole morning had been weird. It had been too quiet. There was no offkey musical number through his bathroom wall. He missed the sprightly knock at his door that came about ten minutes too early. He missed guessing which of your faces he’d get when you realized he wasn’t ready. He was amazed at how quickly he had gotten used to you. Had they really only been at this hotel for four days? Five?
His memory taunted him as he walked to Red Bull. He recalled himself holding his breath in anticipation as you closed in on him last night. He felt his heartbeat all the way up to his throat, his pulse points throbbed. It was an out of body experience, watching in slow motion as he pulled himself away from you. He finally learned it was for the best, even though the dejected look on your face pained him.
When he got there, he was disappointed to discover he was the last to arrive, wishing he had more moments alone with you. Christian, Joe, and in-house Red Bull lawyer bros sat around you, centering you as a vibrant glow in a sea of dull blues and grays. He was relieved to discover that you had reserved the seat next to you. He felt his face involuntarily break into grin as he noticed you notice him come into frame.
Christian, who was sitting across from you with his back to the door, saw the slightest twitch of your facial muscles. He whipped around, before a smile was fully formed, knowing exactly what it meant.
“The man of the hour! So nice of you to finally join us.” Everyone stood up for another round of hand shakes and self-congratulatory pats on the back. He could hardly maintain eye contact, his gaze constantly darting back to you. You rose to your feet, but remained in place, patiently waiting your turn for him.
He finally stood in front of his reserved chair, directly facing you. He wasn’t sure what to do – he knew you so well, a handshake hardly seemed appropriate. But you were in front of professionals so a hug wouldn’t do. He knew what he wanted to do, and that certainly wasn’t an option. Fortunately you made the decision for him, instinctively sticking your hand out. He would’ve been a little sad about it, but for the knowing twinkle in your eye. Your palms firmly met, and he appreciated how soft and delicate yours were. It was like you were holding hands.
“Eh-hem.”
You cleared your throat, eyes suddenly piercing. It wasn’t until he felt you try to pry your hand away that he realized he had been shaking it about six seconds too long. He finally relinquished his grip and you both sat down.
“Sorry, I spaced out,” he whispered to you. You only gave him a twitch of a smile and a curt nod in return before swiveling your chair to face the other side of the table.
“Now then. Let’s get started, shall we?”
-
Daniel almost felt silly for pushing this whole ordeal back an extra day. Almost. He could imagine you marching out of there muttering this could have been an email under your breath. The contract was, for all intents and purposes, finished and truly just needed to be signed. It only took twenty minutes to do a walk through of the terms, which of course no one objected to after the countless back-and-forth’s of redlines, late night phone calls, and negotiations.  And then, with a swift flick of his wrist, it was set in stone.
He stared at the wet blue ink on the page. He didn’t realize he was smiling until his cheeks started to hurt.
“I guess we’re engaged now. This feels familiar.” When he finally looked up Christian was beaming back at him like a proud dad.
“Welcome back, Daniel. Welcome home.”
-
“You do realize that could’ve been an email?” He laughed as he waited behind for you to pack up your stuff. Joe in typical fashion had exchanged quick pleasantries after the signing and was gone in a flash, off to the next client. The other Red Bull representatives followed suit not long after.
“It could’ve, but where’s the fun in that?” He watched as you stuffed the last binder into your bag, fighting with the zipper. When you finished you looked up to find him staring intently at you, causing you to nearly drop your bag.
“Can I help you?”
He leaned against the table, crossing his arms over his chest. You stared at his tan forearms, noticing his veins bulge.
“That depends… do you like surprises?” You did your best to hide a gulp, your throat suddenly dry. He couldn’t possibly be insinuating what you thought…
But if he was, two could play at that game.
“Depends on the surprise,” you purred, leaning forward ever so slightly to show off the v of your necklace that led a trail to your hidden cleavage.  
He leaned forward to meet you part way, not breaking eye contact.
“I think you’ll like this one,” he whispered. You felt goosebumps raise on your skin, giddy in suspense. Your heart was about to burst through your chest. Was he really about to take you right here in this office?
Without warning he pushed himself from the table and walked quickly towards the door, leaving you bewildered in the middle of the room. He stopped in the doorway and looked back at you innocently.
“What are you waiting for? Follow me!”
He proceeded to skip down the hallway, forcing you to jog to try to keep up with him.
“Daniel! Wait up! What the hell?”    
He led you to the exit of Red Bull hospitality before he finally stopped.
“I may or may not have called in a favor.”
“Daniel, this isn’t funny. What –“
You stopped in your tracks as the doors opened. With your jaw on the floor, you let out a silent scream as Geraldine Estelle Halliwell Horner, aka Geri, aka Ginger Spice, aka one-fifth of the iconic girl group The Spice Girls, stood in front of you in the flesh. As a child of the 90’s, this moment felt biblical.
Apparently Christian was also there. “Oh Darling, I have someone I want to introduce you to.”
You were already barely functioning when she turned away from her husband and made direct eye contact with you. Then, as though it were a conversation about the weather, she very casually said “Oh hello. You must be y/n, I’ve heard so much about you. It’s very nice to meet you.”
Your hand gripped over your chest. Eyes wide, you looked to Daniel to confirm she was not a hologram, but he only gave you a wide grin, then back to Geri who was waiting patiently for you to act like a human which was unfortunately too big of an ask.
“I-you’re-ohmygodIcan’tbelievethisishappening-I-hi-I mean…. You know my name.” You dissolved into fits of nervous giggles. Daniel stood there very pleased with himself. He was a little insulted you weren’t this starstruck when you met him, but it was overshadowed by the immense satisfaction he felt that he initiated something that made you so happy.
Geri gave a sympathetic smile. Clearly this was not the first time a fan lost their shit at her mere presence. “I do. I hear you’ve been very busy the last few weeks.”
“What? Oh, right. Yeah I’ve spent a lot of time with Daniel and your husband.” you blabbed, quickly changing the topic. “Do you and the girls still hang out regularly? Spice World was my favorite movie growing up, and-and-and I memorized all of the choreography to Stop and Spice Up Your Life.” You continued talking a million miles a minute.
“Well that’s good to know in case we ever need a fill-in,” she joked trying to put you at ease. Your demeanor quickly sobered and you put a hand over your heart.
“Oh, Miss Halliwell. I could never replace Victoria on your next reunion tour, but if you absolutely insist I would be honored to step in to ensure the show goes on,” you swore in earnest. Geri slowly nodded, locking eyes with Daniel behind you doing her best to telecommunicate with him. What the fuck. He only shrugged as he continued beaming.
“Well, I’ll keep that in mind,” she said slowly and politely. Daniel finally interjected.
“Y/n, you have to pack and I’m sure Geri and Christian have their own flights to catch…”
“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to take up so much of your time,” you said, Daniel’s voice beginning to bring you back down to earth. You rummaged through your bag, before proudly presenting your hand to her. “Here’s my card in case you or any of the girls need any type of legal assistance, happy to go over any contracts for you or whatever else you may need.” Geri’s forced smile relaxed, appreciating your hustle and intellect.
“This is great, thank you. Girl power, right?” And just like that you were back on Saturn. You proudly held up a peace sign as though you were giving an oath.
“Girl Power. Forever,” you swore. Daniel gently put his hand on your lower back to try and herd you along, but you turned to look back as you walked. “And now that you have my number, let me know if you ever want to get your nails done together or get coffee or even a yoga class!” you called after her. Geri chuckled and waved.
“It was nice meeting you too,” she shouted back.
“Good seeing you too y/n – what am I, chopped liver?” You kept walking and waved him off.
“Oh right, sorry. Yeah yeah, nice seeing you too Christian. Pleasure doing business.”
You proceeded to gush about the encounter the entire way back to the hotel. Your hands flailed in the air as you excitedly repeated every little detail, even though Daniel had also been there to witness the whole thing. Your eyes were bright and wide, still processing the adrenaline.
“So did I do alright then?” he asked cheekily as you approached your rooms.
“Did you do alright?! That was one of the best moments of my life, I could kiss you!” 
The words slipped out before you had a chance to think, stopping both of you in your tracks. They hung heavy in the air, waiting for an answer. But for the tension that had dragged on, and built, and compounded on itself for months, the statement would never be interpreted as anything other than an innocent, facetious comment for dramatic effect. But Daniel looked at you intently hoping you meant it. He turned his body to align with yours as you remained frozen, and cautiously stepped forward to remove the space between you. Your mouth parted slightly, trying to find words to explain yourself but drew a blank. He leaned in ever so slightly, his hot breath beating on the side of your face and tickling your ear.
“So do it,” he whispered, just loud enough for you to hear him. You dared to lock eyes with him, searching for an answer. His hand finally did what it had wished to do for so long, gently pushing hair out of your face and finding a home at the nape of your neck. He left it there, but he didn’t have to use any force to bring you together as your heads naturally tilted and pulled inwards like magnets. It was dizzying having his face so close to yours, feeling his breath tickle your nose and your cheeks, stoking the flush that had your face burning.
It was only when your lips were so close that you inhaled each other’s oxygen that you suddenly remembered you were in a very public hallway. You were still in your suit, that felt like it was about suffocate you. To his disappointment, and yours, you fell into old patterns. You pried yourself out of his orbit, stumbling backwards.
“Would you look at the time? I, um, need to go pack. Long flight tomorrow,” you stammered, as you continued backwards towards your room. 
“y/n…”
“Congratulations again, I’m super happy for you.”
“Can we at least talk about this?” You fumbled with your keys pretending not to hear him, your focus on the floor.
“It was great working with you. You have a bright future back at Red Bull, I’m sure everything will work out. Have a safe trip back to Perth.”
And with that final, clinical, arms-length message, you left him in the hallway. 
244 notes · View notes
hsyvers · 10 months
Note
IM IN LOVE WITH SPIDER-JEN you dont even understand 🥰😝😻 but im craving some angst... can you write yn getting attacked by one of yunjins enemies and she doesnt get there in time? my heart hurts just by requesting this 🤧
for you, i'd bleed myself dry - spiderwoman!h.yj x reader
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WARNING(S); vague descriptions of death
NOTES; 1k. i hate writing angst so so much but when someone requests i'll try my best to deliver so 😭 yk atsv and like the thing abt canon events....and the last gwenter scene in tasm 2....yeah....im kinda denying that it's a pt.2 to my spiderwoman yunjin fic bc im delulu <3
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"hey!" yunjin yells, her heart hammering in her chest, "y/n! i need to hear you!"
"i'm okay!" you respond shakily, standing on a tiny ledge that oversaw the whole hollow clocktower, except for a bunch of gears moving. the fall would still be able to kill, "focus on your fight!"
yunjin lets out a relieved sigh, wincing at the action. her ribs hurt the more she breathes, her vision getting blurry the more she evades her enemy's attacks.
how much has technology advanced anyway? with all the guys yunjin has had to deal with, especially the last few months, it felt like every terrible person was trying to be on par with spiderwoman.
that's how you all ended up on top of this fucking clocktower anyway. if it weren't for her insisting to give you a quick kiss, he might have thought you were just a normal civilian.
'fucking idiot,' she thinks to herself, forcing her limbs to move. once she feels her foot connect with his face, she dives down to get you.
"hold on tight," she orders, with you nodding quickly. she webs something sturdy above the both of you, but just as she pulls up, the criminal cuts it off.
all yunjin can hear is your gasp and his sickening laugh.
she grabs you with a web and sends another one to hold her up.
he seems bored of repeating the same action, jumping down to challenge yunjin to take him on again.
you see the white eyes of her mask focusing on you, and at this moment, it hurts to think of how much she loves you.
when he tries to grasp her arm, you shout a warning, and yunjin manages to kick him off again, her arm swinging to throw a punch before she holds herself up again.
then the gears meet, and your web snaps.
it happens so quickly, that, you wonder if you even screamed.
yunjin doesn't either. she just jumps.
lower, and lower, and lower.
a string chases your chest.
you hear a crack, and you feel yunjin's arms envelop you.
and you're grateful that that's the last thing you feel.
"please, please, please, oh fuck," yunjin pulls off her mask, tears streaming down her cheeks when she falls to the floor, cradling you, "please, babe, no. don't do this."
she leans her ear to your chest, and she has the urge to die herself when she hears nothing.
"honey, no, please," she begs softly, her chest wrecking with sobs when she presses a lingering kiss to your temple.
"get up, okay? tell me you're alright. scold me for being late to practice. yell at me for dropping you!"
it aches. it aches how alive you looked and how dead you felt.
"i'm so sorry, i'm so sorry," she chants, holding you closer as she cries, "it's all my fault. i should've-...i..."
"you look so tired," you whisper, one late night.
yunjin had come home around 3 am, and she's sitting tiredly on your bed, nuzzling her face onto your chest as you stood and held her.
"everything...hurts."
you pull her mask off, expression souring when you see a cut on her lip and eyebrow.
"one day, i'll kill the people who hurt you like this," you declare quietly, after patching her up, like you always have, and you always will.
"no need," she whispers, burying her face in your hair when you lay on the bed, "i'll handle them and you handle me, okay?"
you giggle, and nod in approval, taking her hand to press gentle kisses on her battered knuckles, "i'll take care of you."
and yunjin is surprised at how much she yearns. even when you're around. and painfully more so when you're not.
"it's rotten work."
"not to me. not if it's you."
she remembers falling asleep to your voice.
she never regretted touching you, kissing you, telling you how she loved you, every single day. she never forgot your lips on her own, her cheeks, and her scars.
maybe that's why it was so utterly devastating.
because she never felt that strongly about anyone, or anything. she was the city's protector while you were hers.
she crumbles completely, and she sits there for hours.
the police can arrive, blame everything on her, arrest her, she didn't care.
the only reason why she tears herself away from your body, was so you could be buried properly. she feels as though she can't speak, her eyes red and dull when she left you.
she doesn't come out of her room for days. everyone seems to notice spiderwoman's absence. her friends try to get to her, but she refuses to respond.
she finally shows her face at your funeral, and when they ask why she did, she merely says it's all for you.
and also, she thinks, because you saved her. again, even after death. you did have a way with words, after all.
to my soulmate,
i know you warned me before we started dating, about how i might be in as much danger as you are.
if you found this, it's because you were right, and for whatever reason, i can't be with you right now.
i just want to say that i don't regret kissing you that one night after you saved me, and i certainly wouldn't take back all the love i have given you and my experiences of you giving all you have left in you to me.
in fact, i'd do it all over again, and even now, i love you, i love you, i love you.
you got this! you can pull through it. you're the strongest person i know. and don't forget to lean on our friends if you need them. i know you'll be in good hands.
i took care of you for as long as i could, and you protected me to the best of your ability. i know, because i trust you.
so please, continue to smile and laugh for me, i'll be watching from wherever i am, so don't you dare forget it!
yours forever,
the love of your life (your words, not mine, babe)
542 notes · View notes
picsthatmakeyougohmm · 6 months
Note
Hello Dear Friend.
I was in your country in 2019.I have gone through your profile and decided to go straight to the point on why i wholeheartedly contacting you.
My name is Mrs. Marion Gadsby from Thailand,Australian,79years,I have been diagnosed with Esophageal cancer .It has defiled all forms of medical treatment, and right now I have only about a month to live, according to medical experts. I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I never really cared for anyone (not even myself) but my business was my priority.
Though I am a very rich lady, I was never generous, I was always hostile to people and only focused on my business as that was the only thing I cared for. But now I regret all this as I now know that there is more to life than just wanting to have or make all the money in the world.
I Am very sick now and depends on machines to survive which I know one day one minute I will be no more , but before departing I have a fortune I will like to confined your position so that you can use it and do the humanitarian work which I failed to do when I had the grace and the time. I have willed and given to my immediate and extended family members ,but these last funds I would want to be useful to the poor and the needy. I don't trust any of my family members again because I don't think that they will deliver the fortune to the poor and needy. This is the main reason why I contacted you because I believe you will make it happen as I will instruct you in the future when the fortune is in your hands.
I want God to be merciful to me and accept my soul, so I have decided to give alms to charity organizations, as I want this to be one of the last good deeds I do on earth.
I cannot do this myself anymore. I once asked members of my family to close one of my accounts and distribute the money which I have there to charity organizations in Bulgaria and Pakistan, but they refused and kept the money to themselves and used it to buy flashy cars and big houses in the city. Hence, I do not trust them anymore, as they seem not to be content with what I have left for them. The last of my money which no one knows of is the sum of $3,000,000.00( Three Million dollars) my late husband was wealthy as an oil mogul, politician and other businesses, but he died in his private jet crash .WE CAN'T QUESTION GOD.
I will let you have 20% of his funds for your effort and time and the 80% should go to the poor and needy around you, especially those that are in war zones. Treat this message confidentially till it's done. I am waiting for your reply.
Contact me direct for more information. [email protected]
Mrs Marion Gasby. [email protected]
Finally destiny knocked at my door. I'm rich! I don't have to run this blog anymore.
I'll find plenty of big tiddy goth girlfriends with a million dollars
384 notes · View notes
wizard-email · 6 months
Note
Hello Dear Friend.
I was in your country in 2019.I have gone through your profile and decided to go straight to the point on why i wholeheartedly contacting you.
My name is Mrs. Marion Gadsby from Thailand,Australian,79years,I have been diagnosed with Esophageal cancer .It has defiled all forms of medical treatment, and right now I have only about a month to live, according to medical experts. I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I never really cared for anyone (not even myself) but my business was my priority.
Though I am a very rich lady, I was never generous, I was always hostile to people and only focused on my business as that was the only thing I cared for. But now I regret all this as I now know that there is more to life than just wanting to have or make all the money in the world.
I Am very sick now and depends on machines to survive which I know one day one minute I will be no more , but before departing I have a fortune I will like to confined your position so that you can use it and do the humanitarian work which I failed to do when I had the grace and the time. I have willed and given to my immediate and extended family members ,but these last funds I would want to be useful to the poor and the needy. I don't trust any of my family members again because I don't think that they will deliver the fortune to the poor and needy. This is the main reason why I contacted you because I believe you will make it happen as I will instruct you in the future when the fortune is in your hands.
I want God to be merciful to me and accept my soul, so I have decided to give alms to charity organizations, as I want this to be one of the last good deeds I do on earth.
I cannot do this myself anymore. I once asked members of my family to close one of my accounts and distribute the money which I have there to charity organizations in Bulgaria and Pakistan, but they refused and kept the money to themselves and used it to buy flashy cars and big houses in the city. Hence, I do not trust them anymore, as they seem not to be content with what I have left for them. The last of my money which no one knows of is the sum of $3,000,000.00( Three Million dollars) my late husband was wealthy as an oil mogul, politician and other businesses, but he died in his private jet crash .WE CAN'T QUESTION GOD.
I will let you have 20% of his funds for your effort and time and the 80% should go to the poor and needy around you, especially those that are in war zones. Treat this message confidentially till it's done. I am waiting for your reply.
Contact me direct for more information. [email protected]
Mrs Marion Gasby. [email protected]
yes of course Mrs. Marion Gadsby I shall do this right away
173 notes · View notes
literaila · 2 years
Text
just barely 
tasm!peter x fem!reader 
summary:
“okay, peter. are you afraid of spiders?”  “no.”  “then can you go get the one in my apartment?”
warnings: angst, grief, mentions of gwen, arachnophobia, fluff. neighbors au. 
a/n: i am. so sorry. and actually i love this one so much so feed my ego, thanks
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*
peter met you four months into college. 
sitting in his apartment, sewing up a suit that he should've gotten rid of years ago. pricking his fingers with the needle and telling himself that he was going to be more careful this time. 
he never was. 
and when you knocked on his door for the first time, he pricked his finger again. 
he almost swore out loud--flinging his hand in the air like the pain was going to fall off--but briefly remembered how thin the walls were. 
maybe because he could hear you breathing on the other side. 
it was late. peter always knew when it was late. 
and it was raining. he was inside because it was raining. 
and someone was knocking on his door. 
peter, with his finger in his mouth, sucking away the very essence of his life and every ounce of patience he had, did not want to deal with it. 
he didn't quite feel like a human being that night. 
and besides, if it wasn't someone delivering a pizza to his door--no, he didn't order but he might pay if that was the case--peter didn't want to know. 
and then there was another knock. 
so peter, begrudgingly, sliding on a jacket because he was only in sweatpants, went to the door. 
just barely sighed as he swung it open. 
and there you stood. dripping from the rain. 
"hi," you said, the word quick, breathless, like an afterthought. "we haven't met. i'm y/n. i moved in two weeks ago. i've seen you carrying books around and coming in late sometimes but i haven't--" you took a breath in. shook your head. "nevermind. my point is, i'm y/n." 
peter stood there. unsure what to say. he barely took it all in.
he stared at you and your shaking hands and dripping hair. 
he wondered how you got on his doorstep.  
"okay," you said, in lack of an answer. "this is really weird. you probably think i'm crazy. which was... not my goal." 
"i don't think you're--" 
"i have arachnophobia." 
peter blinked. 
"and it sounds crazy--because it is--but there's a spider in my apartment and i just--i can't. i'm cold, and i just got home from work, and there's a spider, like, right by the door, and i can't get it. or walk through the door." you paused, staring at him with wide eyes. "because i'm crazy." 
in a lack of words or any description for this situation, peter ran a hand over his jaw. 
he watched water drip from your hair. drip on the ground. 
you blinked at him. "you have a cut on your thumb, by the way." 
peter looked at his hand. clenched his fist until it was so tight that pain meant nothing but a blur of emotion. 
"oh," he said, stupidly, unknowing. "yeah, i know." 
you cleared your throat. "what's your name?" 
"peter." 
"okay, peter. are you afraid of spiders?" 
he might've laughed at the irony, if not given the fact that any conversation skills--that he may or may not have had--seemed to evade him. 
"no," he shook his head. "no--i, um. no." 
you breathed out, laughing a bit manically. "would you help me with the spider in my apartment then? i'm sorry to bother you, really, but i would like to change my clothes." 
"oh," he said, again, stupidly. "sure. sure." 
"you will?" 
he shook his head. tried to put on a smile that didn't exist. "yeah, of course." 
the words were slow and slurred and nothing like he'd meant them to be. 
peter, just barely, recognized the fact that you were his age. that you were pretty. 
and that you looked almost insane. like you'd said. 
"thank you," you breathed out in relief. "do you want to... um, put some shoes on first? if you're busy i can--" 
"probably shouldn't try anyone else," peter responded, assuming and stupid, and just. "it's three in the morning. i don't think they're awake." 
you opened your mouth, maybe to say something--peter couldn't tell--and then shut it. 
you stared at him like you were sure he was lying. 
like you were annoyed with him. 
he cleared his throat, walking forward a bit, and simultaneously pushing you back. "i don't need my shoes. uh, lead the way." 
he shut the door quietly behind him. 
you nodded. taking ten steps forward to the apartment right across from his. 
"you live right there?" 
while unlocking the door, you nodded your head. water dripping onto your shoes. 
peter briefly considered that he was an asshole. 
"why haven't i seen you before?" 
you looked back at him, swallowing. "i usually work night shifts. um, i mean, i've seen you before, so." 
peter nodded his head dumbly. 
and then you took a step back, staring at him. 
expectedly. 
"oh, you want me to go first?" 
"please." 
so peter walked through, searching the floors for any specimen that he may or may not have been related to. 
you just barely followed behind him. slightly lagging. 
"where was it?" 
"the wall in the back. it was big." 
peter looked back at you, a bit concerned by how nervous you looked just from walking through the door. 
"i don't see it." 
peter looked up and down the walls. followed his feet to the floor, making sure that he hadn't stepped on anything. 
and this is the point where he figured that he'd leave. let you get back to your business. 
maybe think about being more cordial to his neighbors. 
but you just barely said his name. quiet against the rain. 
he looked at you. "hmm?" 
"this is ridiculous, but, would you just--just look for it. like. in the other room. i won't be able to fall asleep, and--" 
peter was quick to nod. "yeah. i got it." 
and so he searched through your living room. feeling only slightly weird that he was looking through a stranger's house, while said stranger stood right at the doorway. 
but after around three minutes, he noticed a spider crawling on the opposite side of the wall. about an inch big. 
but he wasn't judging. 
"okay," he called to you, allowing the bug to crawl up his hand. "i got it." 
"the window doesn't have a screen." 
peter allowed himself a quick laugh--because, above all else, this was the weirdest three am he'd had in a while--and let the spider crawl outside, whispering a quick goodbye. 
and then he walked back to you, scratching at his thumb. 
you awkwardly thanked him, reaching your hand out to shake his. 
when peter stared for a moment, confused, you dropped it. 
and then you waited. 
and peter probably should've just left your apartment. 
that was what a considerate neighbor might do. 
"you're really that afraid of spiders?" 
"um, yeah," you shook your head, scratched at the back of your neck, and looked more uncomfortable than peter had ever seen another person. "it's--it's a feeling thing." 
peter tilted his head, curious. 
"well, like, just imagining them crawling around. or up and down my skin." you shivered, and peter assumed it wasn't from the cold. "i mean, i know that most spiders can't do any harm." 
peter coughed. 
"but still... it's hard to explain." 
"no," peter nodded, watching as your eyes fluctuated from the wall to him, from the ground to the ceiling. "i understand. they're creepy." 
"i guess. i know that they're important. thanks for not killing that one." 
peter just barely blinked. 
"well," you said, smiling at him. "you should go to sleep. i'm sorry for keeping you up." 
"it's no problem." peter swore. 
he'd forgotten all about the rain. or his suit. or the tiny little cut on his thumb. 
"have a good night, peter. thanks for your help." 
you smiled at him--this time, sincere and appreciative--one last time. 
peter met you four months into college. he'd whispered his goodbyes in the rain and was unfathomably interested in his neighbor. 
and maybe he'd always known that he was going to fall in love with you. 
*
"hey," you whisper, late enough for the words to feel strange on his spine. 
"hey," he says back, but only because it's what he should do. 
you run your fingers along his forearm, leaving terror in your wake. 
"how are you?" 
you ask him. 
and peter can't really answer that. 
*
when peter saw you again, it was with his backpack slung over his shoulder. 
with papers and the weight of thousands of dollars in debt piling up in one bag that probably shouldn't have been carrying it all. 
but when you smiled at him, peter shrugged it off, and just smiled back. 
"hey," you said, quickly and carefully, unlocking your door. "how are you?" 
"good." peter nodded. "um, you?" 
you laughed, maybe because of the long pause between the words. "i'm okay. it's nice to be out with the sun." 
"yeah. haven't seen you around." 
"not like you did before, either." 
peter nodded again. his eyebrows were ready to run right off of his face. 
you were carrying bags in your hands, one on the ground, turning back around to your door because peter hadn't offered anything significant to you. 
so he cleared his throat. "did you--do you want some help?" 
you looked down at the ground, seemingly surprised by your own grocery bags. "oh, yeah." eyes met his. "i don't want to bother you again." 
"it's no bother." 
and so peter picked up the bag on the ground. he reached his hand out and barely felt it when your fingers passed his. 
or when you smiled at him, grateful again. 
"i don't mean to keep using you," you said to him, finally unlocking your door. "you just seem to be there." 
"it's only twice." 
you nodded, moving back so that he could walk in. "for now." 
peter snorted, feeling uncomfortable as his shoes hit your carpet. 
"i like your apartment, by the way. it's nice." 
more trinkets than his. a home full of things that peter didn't recognize. 
and still, it was brighter than his apartment. 
you lead him into the kitchen, pointing to where he should set the bags down.
peter could feel your eyes on him. sort of creeping. sort of subdued in a casual way. 
"thanks. i like it," you answer. "or, i like it when there aren't any bugs crawling around."  
peter let his lips twitch. he moved back, giving you the room to start putting the perishables away. 
"are you always getting pulled into everyone else's apartments?" you asked him, biting your lip and looking up. 
your eyes were quick, lit, and less emphasized than they'd been when it was three in the morning. 
peter frowned. "what?" 
"yesterday i helped someone move a couch into their apartment. and last week mrs. rivers needed some help with her tv. i just meant that you seem helpful. dependable." you shrugged. "do people ask you for help a lot?" 
"no, not really," peter answered, words still confused. "i don't 'run into' people very often. and i don't think they would ask me." 
you blinked, closing a cabinet and turning away from him. 
"why not?" 
"i don't know anyone very well." 
peter breathed out and you hummed, unbagging things that peter couldn't see. 
"sometimes mr. smith from down the hall asks me to water his plants when he goes to see his son." 
you nodded, like this made perfect sense to you. 
"but that's about it." 
"how long have you lived here?" 
"almost five months." 
"hmm." 
you emptied another bag, not watching as peter leaned against your counter. 
he felt like he should go. that he was intruding on some boundary that he shouldn't have been. 
but he stayed because you hadn't asked him to leave. 
"what?" he asked, shaking his head. 
"are you a busy person?" 
in this game of twenty questions, peter seemed to be answering everything. 
and ignoring the gentle curiosity aimed his way. 
to complain would be hypocritical. 
"i guess. school and work. why?" 
you shrugged, again. "that's probably why you don't know your neighbors. if you're not here a lot..." 
peter crossed his arms. there was something in your tone of voice. something in your eyes and strange way of speaking. 
"i know my neighbors." 
you just barely smiled. "yeah?" 
"yeah. you're y/n. you've lived here four weeks, and you're afraid of spiders." 
you laughed. "that doesn't count." 
peter frowned. licked his lips and let the adrenaline control any next statement. 
"mr. smith lives in 3C. he's got two kids. if you listen late enough at night you can hear him calling his son in florida." 
you looked at him again, pausing. 
so peter continued. 
"ms. baker is divorced. she got the cat, which is good because she loves that cat more than life itself. she makes brownies and then leaves them to rot on her windowsill. or she used to. until she started leaving them in the mail room." 
you laughed. leaned against the counter next to him and crossed your ankles. 
"david, the building manager, loves halloween. if he could, he would decorate the whole place. but it's a fire hazard, so he just decorates the laundry room." 
"isn't that a fire hazard too?" 
peter considered it. "probably." 
you laughed again. 
"the girl in 6B, moira, is a single mom. her daughter doesn't like thunderstorms, so she's always crying. unless moira swaddles her and puts on old sixties music. and mrs. alvera gets flowers every week. jason blasts music on the weekends but no one complains because everyone is scared of him."
peter continued. he wasn't thinking about leaving. 
"there's a little boy down the hall, henry, who loves trains. his dad sends him some in the mail. mr. johnson has a dog who he hates." 
and there's something in your eyes. 
peter breathed out, chest a bit tight. he'd never been very good at defeat. 
"so," he said.
"so?" 
"so i know my neighbors." 
you smiled at him. turned towards the fridged and grabbed two water bottles, one to offer to him. 
he took it, but only for something to do with his hands. 
"and you're peter," you say, slowly. 
"parker." 
"peter parker. you're always coming and going at odd times. you're a student--probably at esu--and you're nice." 
and then peter smiled. he was willing to admit that. 
*
"what're you doing?" you ask him, stepping into the room and dropping your bag on the floor. 
peter barely flinches at the sound. 
he blinks up at the clock, noticing numbers that he should have an hour ago. 
"hey," he says, dumbly. "you're home." 
you lean down to kiss his head. he can feel your smile. "yeah. what're you doing?" 
"just fixing some holes." 
peter gestures down to the suit. looks up at you and tries not to falter at your eyes. 
you’re staring at him. 
you look tired, had been at work all day, and still--you offered him a smile.
the same sweet smile he'd been getting for a year and a half. 
"don't hurt yourself," you whisper to him, laughing just a bit. 
peter looks down at the needle between his fingers.
he barely just caught the joke as you walk out of the room to go change into your work clothes. 
and theres the tiniest part of him that feels relieved for the silence.  
relieved to not have to stare at you. 
and face the goddamn reality. 
*
peter had been getting used to the knocks on his door. 
he recognized your specific weight, the sequences, and cadence in whatever you needed from him. 
and he wasn't as hesitant to open the door. 
"hey, peter," you said to him, a bit breathless. "do you have a wrench?" 
peter blinked. "what?"
you made a strange hand gesture. "you know, the thing that you twist stuff with?" 
peter's brow furrowed. he opened the door a little bit more, noticing your wet pants and the lack of shoes or socks. 
"i know what a wrench is," he said. "why do you need it?" 
"sink's leaking." 
his lips pursed. he waited for more of an explanation, but you offered him none. 
"yeah," he said, finally. "i have a wrench. come in." 
and then he swung the door open and left you to fend with it yourself. 
and listened to your footsteps as you followed him to his supply closet. 
"i don't think i've ever been in here," you said from behind him, voice echoing in his empty hallway. "not what i expected." 
peter looked back at you with a raised brow. 
you raised your hands in defense. "you seem like a poster kind of guy." 
"there's a poster in my room." 
"of what?" 
"a spider." 
you scoffed from behind him, and peter had to pay close attention to his face--just so that he didn't laugh back. 
he dug through his shelves, looking for a tool kit that he'd hidden away. 
unused, because he didn't want it. 
because he didn't need it anymore. 
"here," he said, handing you the wrench, initials branded on the side. 
"why thank you, peter parker." 
you smiled up at him, a mark on the side of your face--peter couldn't tell what it was. 
"sure," he agreed, shutting the closet behind him. "why don't you just call maintenance?" 
"hmm?" 
"for your sink." 
"oh, um. well, i need to use it. and it's almost six so there's no time to call." 
"do you know how to fix a sink?" peter allowed a cautious raise of his brow. a curiosity that he wasn't really allowed appeared in his throat, swallowed right back down by guilt. 
"i know how to use google." 
"so no." 
 you raised a finger at him, looking defensive. "it can't be that hard." 
peter laughed. 
"what?" 
"i hope that your apartment doesn't flood." 
"mean, peter," you frowned at him. "i could have a talent for fixing sinks." 
and then you turned around, leaving him no room to argue, and headed for the door. calling another thank you as you opened it. 
but peter opened his mouth before you could leave. 
"why didn't you ask?" 
you turned back, wide eyes. "what?" 
"if i could help. you didn't ask." 
"can you fix a sink?" 
"yes." 
peter would've liked to lie. maybe if you had been any other person, he might've. 
you grinned. "i've already used you enough. i'm working on my dependency." 
peter shrugged. "never hurts to ask." 
your lip twitched the barest amount. 
you played with his wrench, swinging it from hand to hand. "i'll bring this back." 
"okay." 
peter let the interest fall off of his shoulders and onto the ground. 
he had things he needed to do. like, putting a cup of mac and cheese into the microwave. 
and read for his class tomorrow. 
and consider every failure he'd ever made. 
but you called his name, just once more. 
"yeah?" he opened the door, a little bit wider. 
"wanna help me fix my sink?" 
peter, now, considers that you might've been pitying him. poor peter, all alone on a saturday night. 
but then he just blindly nodded. 
forgot all about consequences. 
*
"peter, you can't just get ice cream." 
peter looks down at his shopping bag. he frowns. "there's chips too." 
"where are the meals?" 
he smiles at you. "in your basket." 
"we already agreed that i'm not cooking for you anymore." 
peter pretends to consider this. "you know, i actually changed my mind about that. statistically, you probably won't burn down my apartment again." 
"statistically, i'm going to hit you one of these days." 
peter holds a hand to his heart, mock offended. "violence," he protests, taking a step back as you try and push him. 
"go get something to eat." 
"i'm going to eat all of this." 
"okay," you grin at him. "go get something that you probably won't eat." 
peter groans. this time, you actually push him. 
"we'll order pizza tonight if you get some actual groceries." 
"why are you always nagging me?" 
peter says it, but with a smile on his face. 
you laugh back at him. pat his cheek like you're his grandmother. "go." 
peter sighs and listens. 
and it's fine. for today. 
*
surely enough, peter couldn't manage to avoid you. 
it might've been that you lived right across from him. peter realized that. 
or it might've been the world, laughing and laughing at him. 
because he really wanted to avoid you. 
he wanted to stop answering the door; to keep you at a safe distance--that being ten feet away from him at all times--with a wall between the two of you. 
he wanted whatever he felt when he saw you smile--which was nothing, he swore to himself, over and over--hidden in a closet somewhere. 
someplace that he could just forget about it. 
but he couldn't seem to forget his neighbor. 
his neighbor who, like always, seemed to leave the house at the same time as him. 
"oh, hi," he said, carefully avoiding running into you. 
you looked up, hands cradling a pizza box, bag dangling from the side. and you smiled at him. 
because you were a smiley person. 
peter hated it. 
"hey, neighbor," you said, easily, stepping past him. "going out?" 
peter swallowed. "just to the store. i need some... salt." 
what he really needed was to get out of the house. 
what he needed was to stop going through the pictures under his bed this late at night, and stop allowing himself to feel any sort of adoration for the girl in them. 
what he needed, peter thought, was a reality check. 
a time machine. 
but he wasn't going to tell you any of that. 
"salt?" you repeated, laughing. "i have salt." 
"no, i need, like, a salt shaker. a big one." 
your brows furrowed. 
peter rubbed his hands together, slightly cold. slightly irritated. 
and guilty, because he hadn't wanted to be rude to you. he wanted to be polite, a gentleman like may taught him. 
but time did strange things to people. 
and he'd been living alone for more than half a year. 
"the grocery store is probably closed by now," you said, checking an invisible watch. 
"i'm just going to the cvs down the block." 
you laughed. "i don't think they have salt shakers." 
he scratched at the back of his neck. considered clawing his own eyes out. 
"you can borrow mine, though," you said to him, softly, as if no one else was supposed to hear. "if you're in a pinch." 
"no," peter shook his head. he repeated the word in his mind until it was branded against his skin. "that's... okay." 
you raised a brow. 
"i don't--i'm not, like, using it, right now. i've just been meaning to pick some up. and i don't have anything to do right now, so."��
if peter could go back and tell himself not to say a single thing, he would've. 
he would tell himself never to speak to you ever again. 
but you laughed because peter was funny. because you felt bad for him, in some strange, uncomfortable way. 
"do you have anything to do tomorrow morning?" 
peter shook his head. still. 
"then why don't i give you enough salt for breakfast tomorrow, and then you can go to the store and get a shaker afterward." 
peter swallowed. "i wouldn't want to... impose." 
"i'll even give you a slice of pizza." 
"that's okay." 
"peter," you sighed, almost begrudgingly. "c'mon. i owe you, at least one. and i can't eat a whole pizza myself." 
he bit the inside of his cheek. 
if there were warning bells, he would hear them clearly in his ear. 
"or, i can," you smiled. "but i probably shouldn't. and you probably shouldn't go out this late." 
peter frowned at the implication. 
"it's okay," he said. "you shouldn't--" 
"you don't even have to stay. just come and get some salt." 
peter's eyes flickered down to the pizza box in your hands. 
he thought about being alone. 
about going back into his room and running into memories that would punch him right in the face. 
that would beat him until he couldn't feel anything else. 
he thought about salt. 
about your smile and how much he wanted to stay away. 
he thought way too much. 
but nodded anyway. 
probably because he was an idiot. 
"lead the way," you said, finally opening the door. 
and peter went. 
*
"come on," you say to him, voice soft and haunted. 
quiet and eery. 
and peter doesn't want to. 
he doesn't want to be close to you right now. 
but your hands are soft against his shoulder, warm and welcoming, and he knows that you're waiting. he knows that you don't deserve this. 
he knows you. 
"peter," you say to him, calling and calling. "it's alright." 
your voice is different. 
not as smooth. not as beautiful. 
"come back to bed." 
peter lets your hands lead the way. 
he lets you pull him down, push him under water and sit on his chest. laugh as he struggles to get up. 
he lets you wrap the covers back around his back, saving him from the cold. 
he cuddles close to you, breathing in your skin, cheek on your chest, listening to your heartbeat until it's the only thing he can hear. 
"it's okay," you say. "it'll be okay." 
and he knows you're lying. 
peter is familiar with the concept. 
with breaking the rules until no glue can help repair them. 
and he hears a very specific gasp in his head. a pleading and crying and dying all over again. 
but your heartbeat is right in his ear. 
your words are close to him, holding him down. 
*
"i swear to god--" you kicked at a rock somewhere on the ground. 
peter blinked, trying to get his eyes to focus. 
"--i'm going to murder someone." 
he squinted at you, trying to see anyone else. held his jacket even closer to his body. 
"hey," he whispered, hand jerking out when you startled at the sound of his voice. "sorry," he said, keeping you steady. he could see his breath in the air. 
"peter. was it you?" your voice had a hint of an edge. your eyes were fire. 
he frowned. "what?" 
"did your smoke detector go off?" 
"no," he shook his head, looking back at the building. "i was asleep." 
"okay." you nodded, seeming to believe his lie. "i'm going to go ask everyone else." 
peter kept his hands on your shoulders, holding you back. "woah," he said, looking into your eyes. "what's the rush?" 
"i'm going to punch whoever was burning down their kitchen at four in the morning." 
"i think maybe you should take some deep breaths." 
you mocked inhaling and exhaling. "there. mr. smith!" you called. 
peter clasped a hand over your mouth. 
you glared at him. speaking against his hand. 
peter quickly moved away, trying to remember himself. trying to remember that he was only three feet away from you. 
which breaks the foundation directly in half. 
he raised a brow, a bit amused, slightly delirious from exhaustion. "you should stay here. it'll only be ten minutes till we can go back inside." 
"who starts a fire at four in the morning?" you whine to him, almost falling against his chest. 
his hands go back on your arms, keeping you up. "an asshole," peter agreed. "were you asleep?" 
"no. i got home thirty minutes ago." 
"ah. were you trying to go to sleep?" 
"i was trying to..." you paused, looking away from him. "nevermind. yes. i was sleeping." 
peter laughed. "okay. you can get back to..." he shakes his head, an allusion. "whenever the fire department shows up." 
"it's cold," you complain to him. "and i didn't have any time to put on my shoes." 
"i'm glad you're alive." 
that night, peter avoided his sensibility. he didn't want to talk to it, thanks. 
he took off his jacket, handing it to you. "here." 
"peter. you'll get cold." 
"you're in shorts. put it on." 
because you were fed up with every other thing, you didn't argue. just hurried to put it on, snuggling into your own skin. 
"thanks." 
"no problem."
it was silent for a moment; no sirens in hearing distance. 
other people had gathered into groups, neighbors gossiping about neighbors. 
peter thought that you might've been one of them if you weren't stuck next to him. 
"bad night?" he asked you, avoiding the silence. 
"what?" 
"i've never seen you... angry? irritated?"
"oh." you looked down to the ground, a bit sheepish. maybe embarrassed. peter couldn't see your eyes, so he couldn't tell. "yeah. i worked two shifts in a row. and it's tuesday, so everyone was mad." 
"where do you work?" 
"a bar a couple of blocks away." 
peter nodded.
"sorry about..." you laugh, gesturing to something he couldn't see. "all of that." 
"it's okay. you're tired." 
"yeah." 
so was peter. 
and he was insane because he really couldn't stop looking at you. he couldn't even have an internal debate about it. 
"peter?" you whispered to him, smiling a little bit. 
"what?" 
"your jacket smells nice." 
*
peter listens to you speak, appreciating the gentle smile in your voice. 
he watches as your eyes change. as your hand gestures towards something. 
he watches you. 
and there's no one there to tell him to stop. 
*
this particular night, peter knocks on your door. 
he'd decided, after lots of thinking, that the best way to avoid you--was to just get over himself. 
was to just pretend to be a normal neighbor. 
to start acting normal and stop being an idiot. 
which, in all fairness, wasn't as easy as peter thought it might be. 
especially when you opened the door in a big t-shirt and no pants. 
but of course, you just smiled at him. didn't even blink. 
"hey," peter says, quickly. "are you busy?" 
your eyes met his, a gentle question behind the smirk on your face. "no. what's up?" 
"i was gonna, um," peter's face twitched. he cleared his throat, trying to smile even though he'd forgotten how. "i was going to watch a movie. alone. but--" he shrugged. forgot how to speak. "i thought that you might be home. and, just, do you wanna watch with me?" 
you were amused at him. but peter appreciated that you didn't laugh right in his face. 
"what movie?" 
he handed you the case, biting a hole in his lip. 
"back to the future?" 
"if you wanna watch something else, we can--" 
you shake your head, handing him the case back. "no, that's good. let me go grab my phone." 
and then peter had you over to his apartment for the first time. 
he watched a movie with you and didn’t even feel guilty about it. 
*
peter needs a break. 
just a night, an hour, a couple of minutes away from you. 
away from the possibility and the words stuck in his head. 
the words that he would like to avoid. 
the words that he wants to throw in a hole somewhere. bury them where no one will ever find them. 
especially not you. 
especially not him. 
but that's not an option, see. because the words are printed on his arm. they are wrapped around his heart in a brand of shackles they don't manufacture anymore. 
and peter lost the key. 
so he needs a break instead. 
conveniently, you're working. you kissed him goodbye, walked out the door with a smile on your face. 
and peter felt so bad that he was relieved to see you go. 
relieved because he doesn't want to tell you. 
he doesn't want the words to slip. 
he doesn't want any of this. 
and he needs this break. 
he needs a moment to repair his intelligence. to stop acting on a whim. to distance himself from the idea--from the guilt that pounds on his chest like a knock on his door. 
he needs a break. 
a break from sensibility and rational thinking. 
and peter doesn't really need a break from you. 
but he's taking one anyway. 
he can't wait for you to come back. 
*
"you have class tomorrow?" you asked him, chewing on a piece of popcorn. 
"yeah. eleven am." 
"who takes a class at eleven in the morning?" 
peter frowned. "it was convenient." 
you laughed at his face, throwing some popcorn at him. he caught it in his mouth and pretended not to feel some pride at your awed expression. 
"this movie sucks," you said to him. but you were still watching it anyway. 
you'd been sitting on his couch all day. just entertaining him with commentary about whatever movie was on cable. 
peter was glad for the company. 
he was trying to get out of the mood he'd been in. 
trying to get comfortable in this friendship. 
"we can watch something else." he moved to grab the remote, but you stopped him with a nudge of your foot. 
"no," you said. "it's okay." 
and so it was. 
*
"you're going back home next weekend, right?" 
peter nods. he chews on a cookie that you've just pulled out of the oven. 
you glare at him, playfully. 
he smiles back, mouth full. 
"gross, peter." you toss a dish rag at him. he catches it without a blink. 
"may asked if you wanted to come." 
you blink at him, curious. "she did?"
"yeah. she likes you." 
"oh, she likes me from the one time she stopped by your apartment to drop off a box and caught a glimpse of me in the hallway?" you ask him, dryly. 
peter appreciates how your voice shifts from high to low. a style of music all on its own. 
"she likes you because i tell her about you." 
you frown. "you do?"
peter nods, curious about your reaction. 
"what do you say? 'the annoying girl from across the hall asked to use my shower again because--'" 
he pulls you in a little bit closer, ignoring the protests as you drop a spatula on the counter. 
"i tell her that you're nice. and about your cookies."
you smile, reluctantly. "she wants me to come?" 
peter nods, letting you go, returning to his cookie. 
"would you mind?"
peter freezes. 
he prefers not to think about it. 
he prefers to pretend that there is no significance in this interaction. 
because there isn't. 
peter kisses the top of your head, looking down at you. he shakes his head, nonchalant. 
"really?" 
"i wouldn't mind." 
"because i love may." 
peter laughs. "i know." 
"i will ask her about your baby pictures." 
"don't think she has any," peter shrugs.
"oh, you liar." 
he laughs again. grabbing another cookie. 
*
"peter," you walked through his door with no greeting, going immediately to the spot on his couch that you'd claimed as your own. "i want a cat." 
"you can't get a cat." 
you pouted and peter laughed at your face. at the very idea you were in his house.
"why not?" you whined, sliding down his couch. "give me one reason." 
"the building doesn't allow pets." 
"give me two reasons." 
"you'd have to leave the cat alone all day." 
you smiled at him. "not if i had a co-owner." 
"i'm not getting a cat with you." 
you waved a hand, offended. "i didn't mean you. i meant jason." 
"jason would kill the cat. then you." 
"he's really nice." 
peter raised a brow at you, sitting down on the couch finally, just waiting for whatever purpose there was for this visit. 
"hey," you said. "don't you have work tonight?" 
"i switched shifts with a coworker." 
"oh. how come?" 
"they had a birthday party to go to tomorrow." 
you smiled at him, teeth showing. "that was nice of you." 
peter shrugged. "i don't have classes this week, so." 
and here, peter knew, was the last warning sign. 
it was that night that he stopped caring. 
"why aren't you that nice to me?" you put a bare foot on his leg, trying to get him to flinch away. 
he just pushed it off of him. "because i like you." 
"that's twisted, parker." 
"want to watch a movie?" 
you moved back, rubbing a hand over your eyes. "can we play a game or something, instead? i might fall asleep if we watch a movie." 
peter frowned. "you're tired?" 
"no," you shook your head at him. "not really." 
"you should go to bed."
"are you kicking me out?" 
and peter, despite what he wanted to say, shook his head again. 
not sure what he meant by it. 
and then you beamed at him. 
you blinded him until he didn't care about seeing anything ever again. you broke him down until peter was sure that you were his friend. 
that you were his best friend and there wasn't anything he could do about it. 
"how do you feel about connect four?" you asked him. 
and you stayed. 
peter wasn't sure how he felt about that. 
*
gwen. 
peter had nightmares every month. 
he had conflicts and ideas and non-relenting feelings that wouldn't just leave him alone. 
they didn't escape, even when you were around. 
despite what deliberate mistakes peter kept making. despite the conscious failures he kept bundled up in his pockets. 
and whatever peter wanted to feel for you. 
he couldn't. 
he wouldn't do that to her. 
he wouldn't do that to you. 
he wasn't allowed. 
*
the first time peter kissed you, it was a mistake. 
it was reckless. it was pushing and pulling at him until he was stretched thin, until he was so close to you that he couldn't think. 
and peter had been thinking about it for a while. 
he noticed the lingering at your lips.
he noticed how warm you were.
how intriguing how perfect. 
he noticed everything about you, no matter how many times he'd told himself to stop. to stop being your friend and stop thinking about anything except being close to you. 
when he kissed you, it was stupid. 
it was nothing. 
it was so so much. 
"what?" you'd asked him, in the dark, on his couch. 
he was already having a bad day. he was already too close to the edge. 
he'd had a dream about you the night before. instead of her. 
he'd dreamt of your skin, and your hair, the smell that you left behind when you walked out his door. 
he dreamt of touching you, of being closer than he would ever dare himself to be. 
and he was having a bad day. 
peter shook his head. he swallowed and told himself to stop looking at you. "nothing." 
so you turned away from him. 
so you were still close. 
and it only took a split second for peter to forget. 
to forget about guilt and all of its complexities. 
to allow himself to like you, for just a moment, for just a second too long. 
and then his hands reached out--heart clasped in their grip--to touch your arm. 
to feel your skin and savor it. 
your brows furrowed. you looked at him, confused. 
and peter couldn't get anything more than "i just--" before he closed the distance between the two of you. 
before he slammed the door in his own face. 
and kissed you. 
*
neither of you put a name to it. 
you had agreed, peter knew. 
you weren't his girlfriend. 
you weren't his friend. 
but you stayed the night. you watched movies with him. you made out with him on his couch and it wasn't much. 
it wasn't anything. 
there was no name for the thing between the two of you. 
and peter liked it that way. 
at least then he could pretend that it was all okay. 
*
"peter," you were trying to get him to pause. 
you were trying to track him down because he hadn't talked to you in a week. 
he hadn't dared to see you since that night. 
"peter, hey--" 
he unlocked his door, feeling the guilt pour down his stomach like gasoline. 
it tasted the same. 
"i just want to talk," you pleaded with him. "you don't have to say anything." 
"i've gotta go," peter answered, short and stern. 
"please. just two minutes." 
"it's been a long day, y/n." 
"it's been a long week," you hissed at him, stopping his door with your foot. "this isn't fair." 
and peter knew that. 
god, he was aware. 
but he shook his head. "not tonight. not right now." 
not ever, he thought but didn't say. 
"please, peter," your eyes were desperate. your voice had softened, like maybe if you used a euphemism all of this would mean so much less. 
it didn't work. 
"i'm sorry," you whispered. "i didn't mean to." 
peter couldn't have asked what you meant even if he wanted to. 
none of this was your fault. 
he had burned his own bridges. and now, amidst his own problems, he was hurting you. 
so he was just going to stop. 
"it doesn't have to mean anything," 
you said the words, so smoothly, so truthfully. 
wide eyes, as scared as peter had seen them on the first night. he was the new spider on your wall. 
"it doesn't mean anything. we can pretend it never happened." 
peter might've been able to do that. 
he might've been able to just pretend it was fine. 
but he'd kissed you. and now he couldn't stop thinking about it. 
even as you stood by his door, pleading with him. he was staring at your lips. he was waiting for that smile so he could kiss it away. 
"peter. you're my best friend. i don't want to lose that." 
if the words meant anything peter couldn't hear it. 
"i'm sorry," he said, and he wasn't sure to who he was apologizing.
"please." 
"i can't." 
"i'll never bring it up again. i won't kiss you. i won't even complain when you pick out a bad movie. i just want--" you breathed out, a bit panicked. 
peter could see it in your eyes. 
"i just want you peter. that's all. it doesn't have to be more." 
and it didn't. 
he could see it in your eyes. your voice. the quick ticking of the clock in the background.
peter saw his own desperation, reflected in your eyes.
so peter opened the door. he let you inside. 
and he told himself that if he kissed you again, well. it didn't have to be more than that. 
*
peter presses his lips against yours. 
he can feel your smile; leaking into him like poison. like a steady stream of toxin, infecting his blood. 
but he doesn't stop. 
he pushes against you, pulls you even closer. 
he teases at the hair against your neck, he cradles your jaw in his fingertips, and marvels at how soft and smooth you are. 
he bites down on your lip, appreciating the gasp that falls from your lips. 
his hand slung around your waist, traveling up and down your back in a steady motion. 
peter feels as you press against him. as you crave that distance that he's been trying his best to avoid. 
he presses his lips against yours. 
he does it over and over again. 
and despite the gasps of air the two of you need, peter doesn't ever want to stop. 
he could live there; in a blinking moment. 
he applies glue to the edges, tells himself that none of it is going to fall apart. 
his lips travel down to the skin of your neck. tasting you until the rest of it is a blur. 
peter kisses you. 
he tells himself that you don't mean anything more. 
the feeling in his chest is just guilt. 
*
"hey," you poked his shoulder. "what's wrong?" 
peter blinked. tried to focus again. shook his head. "nothing." 
"you look..." you tilted your head, looking right into his eyes. "concerned?" you guessed. "worried?" 
"i'm fine." he grabbed your hand and kissed the knuckles. 
it made up for the lie, peter was sure. 
"what're you thinking about?" 
"nothing." 
you laughed. "peter parker, you mean to tell me that nothing is going on in that giant brain of yours?" 
"nope." 
and you just smiled at him. he appreciated that; you didn't press on the wound. 
only stood there idly while he bleed to death. 
he preferred it that way. 
"are you hungry?" he asked, pulling you up from the couch with him. 
"not much." 
"do you want to go to the park?" 
you'd been teasing him about going earlier. about sitting on a bench and staring at all the birds that walked passed. 
you frowned at him. "you hate the park." 
"i like the park."
"you like the pretzel cart right next to the park. you don't actually like the park." 
"i can like the park if we get a pretzel." 
you snorted. smiled at him, because you were happy. 
because peter knew you. 
because he was sure of it. 
"i suppose we can arrange that," you said to him, rubbing at the skin of his palm. 
and so the two of you left. 
peter forgot all about it. 
how he was looking at you instead of a box of pictures under his bed. 
how that killed him, just a little bit. 
*
peter paces around his apartment. 
you're not there. 
you're not here. 
peter takes a moment to think about where you might be. 
you had plans tonight. 
you had things that you were supposed to be doing with him. 
"dinner and a movie," you said, smiling at him as if he'd just told you a secret. 
and peter smiled back because you were just that cute. 
but you aren't here. 
you aren't answering his calls. 
and you didn't come to your door. 
so peter paces around his apartment. 
he waits for you to arrive, but the time spent thinking about it only allows him to overthink it. 
to picture you, somewhere alone. 
someplace that he won't be able to get you back. 
*
"what's this?" you plucked the picture right off of his shelf. 
you intruded on every carefully sanctioned rule peter had. 
you were in his room. 
and peter didn't have time to stop you before you drifted over to his bookshelf; before you unlocked a secret that he'd been struggling to keep. 
you looked over to him, just curious, eyes just soft. "who's she?" 
as soon as you said the words, peter knew that it couldn't have gone anyway else.
he knew that he couldn't have resolved, reflected, or kept himself from saying anything he wasn't supposed to. 
like a selfish child, he grabbed the picture from your hands. he put it back on the bookshelf, reminding himself how to breathe. 
he couldn't look at you to know that you were concerned. 
he couldn't see beyond the boundaries that had been broken. 
gwen, and gwen, and gwen. 
and you. 
because you were a pest on his wall. 
peter breathed out. he considered stopping right then and there. 
"peter?" you asked, "are you okay?" 
eyes unmoving, dangling off of the edge of the world. his world. 
gwen. 
he looked at the picture--the one from graduation. the only one he had the heart to keep. 
the only one he'd forgotten to lock away. 
"peter?" you repeated, carefully, a gentle hand on his back. 
as if to keep him grounded. 
and that was enough. 
he kicked you out of his apartment. 
*
it was a bad night. 
it was one of the nights when peter woke up in a sweat. where he panicked and fought and tried to kick his way out of any reality he lived in. 
it was a night where only one image was burned into his brain. 
where there was only one person to blame. 
and it wasn't you. 
it wasn't you when your hands grasped at his face; when you tried to bring him back down to someplace safe. 
someplace where he could breathe. 
bring him back to you. 
it was a bad night. one of the nights when peter just forgot to breathe. 
where he just forgot how to think, how to be a person instead of a shell of anger, of denial and grief and all of the things that he'd never managed to break free from. 
it was a night. 
another one and she still wasn't there. 
he still hadn't woken up from the nightmare. 
"gwen," he gasped out because he'd forgotten. 
because you were there. you were right there next to him. 
and you weren't supposed to be. 
you were breaking the rules. 
you were betrayal, knocking at his door every night, ridiculing him with every cruel word. 
"peter," you say, softly, bringing him back down. reminding him of where he is. 
and he breaks free. 
he breaks all over again. 
right into your hands. 
*
he doesn't have a word for it, the way you look at him. 
he doesn't have a firm grasp on how much he cares about you. 
but he worries all day. 
he worries about you, about where you are, about what you're doing. 
he worries that he cares too much. that this is too far. that this means too much. 
that everything has intruded on his careful nothing. 
and he misses you when you're gone. 
and he calls you when he gets the chance. 
and he smiles at you. 
doesn't know how to define the way he feels. 
but it doesn't have to mean anything. 
*
"i'm sorry," he tells you. "that wasn't fair." 
you haven't said a thing. 
you haven't pushed him, having kept your eyes from handing him a letter of resignation. 
i can't do this anymore, you say, with just your eyes. 
"i'm sorry," peter repeats. 
"what do you want, peter?" 
he shakes his head. he contemplates the idea until he forgets where he is. 
"i don't know," he says. "i don't--i'm not sure." 
"well, i am." 
the words are short. 
they are the end of an end. 
peter watches you, waiting for you to leave him--knowing that you'll only hurt him this once. 
that this feeling won't drift into another decade. 
two years of knowing you, he thinks. two years of this. 
"i can't do this anymore, peter." 
he hears you but doesn't understand. 
he thinks but draws no obvious conclusions. 
"i'm sorry," he whispers. 
he doesn't know what he's sorry for. 
"god," you scoff at him. 
a reprimand is thrown against the wall. it ricochets back into his chest, tearing his heart out. reminding him of the things he’s done, again and again.
he kicked you out. 
he threw you away. 
he pushed you so hard and so far that he barely recognizes your face, even now. 
even as you stare at him--begging him to change. begging him to do the one thing he feels most incapable of.
he'd refused to love you for so long that he'd left bruises fighting you. 
peter breathes in. 
"i love you." 
the words throw him a branch. he drops it. he pushes it even further into the ground. dirt and disease and all of the things that he deserves.
he waits for you to leave and leave and leave. 
"peter, i love you.”
it’s a different sentence. it hurts even more.
“are you sorry about that?" you ask him, your anger burning holes in his heart. "are you sorry for letting me love you?" 
he says nothing. 
this means nothing. 
"i can't--i won't sit here and pretend like i don't anymore. i won’t be your statue.”
a beautiful statue, peter realizes.
something to return to. the thing to remain when everything else has been turned to ash. something hidden and secret and just for him.
he thinks of you, stone and iron and every impenetrable thing.
he blanches at the prospect.
“i'm sorry, peter,” you say, and it’s cruel. “because it's not fair to you. i know it's not. but it's not fair to me either." 
tears gather in your eyes. they drown peter in their silence. 
he tries to speak but his words are too quiet. he tries to tell you but his voice has been stolen.
"i'm sorry," you tell him. 
and then you're gone. 
*
"you don't have to tell me," you'd said to him. a long time ago. "whatever it is, i don't care." 
peter thought that you might. that if you knew the truth, you might care. 
that you might not want to be around a murderer like him. 
but he didn't say that. 
"peter," you'd wrapped an arm around him, supported him with all of your weight. "i care about you, you know?" 
it was a question that didn't require answering. 
peter couldn't say it back. guilt had its chains wrapped around him, and was controlling his every move. 
"okay. as long as you know." 
"i don't care," you'd said to him. 
but you would. 
*
peter sits in his apartment alone. 
it's the first time in weeks. 
usually, you're there. usually, you're filling his rooms with laughter. brightening every doorway you walk through. 
you’re there with a warmth peter doesn’t care to describe. a smile he doesn’t want to see; eyes that go beyond a simple conclusion.
you’re there, changing everything. one second at a time.
you distract him until he doesn't need distraction. 
but tonight he's alone. 
tonight he's staring at the pictures he still has of gwen. 
and despite the pain. 
despite the guilt. 
despite all of his attention focused on the photographs in front of him. 
despite it all. 
he's thinking about you. 
*
when peter knocks on your door, he tries not to wince. 
he tries to collect himself into a neat picture. into a semblance of a person. a complete idea. 
he struggles and scrambles around for something spare, something he left behind. 
but he can't manage to find it all before you open your door. 
before you're standing in front of him, eyes puffy. 
it's been a night. 
one night without you and peter's already back. 
some cruel part of him laughs. 
"hey," he says. 
he repeats apologies in his head. tries to print them out into the world. he wants you to know. he wants to tell you.
he wants to just fix this.
you stare at him, mouth open the tiniest bit. unexpected and shocked and everything peter was worried about.
peter scratches at his neck, ashamed. "i know you're still mad. and that i shouldn't be here. i wanted--" he swallows his courage. "i wanted to give you some space, but i..." 
he stops. looks at you. your eyes. a phantom of a smile. and idea he’s lost one too many times.
"i don't want to lose you." 
he repeats the words like a record in his mind. 
your words, he realizes. 
"i can't lose you," he repeats. he feels the grasp on his heart loosen. he breathes out, shakily. "can we talk? i want--i just want--" 
and he falters on the edges of the words.
he can feel the pain, steady as air, crawling up his skin, laughing at him over and over. it presses up against him, whispering that he can’t do it. it ceases to exist at all.
it holds him hostage. he’s not allowed to do this. he’s not supposed to be here, looking at you.
but he wants to feel it. he wants you to hear him clearly. he wants to push this wall away. and he—
if he could just say it.
you open the door. 
because you've always been more forgiving than him. 
*
its a couple of weeks later. 
a couple of weeks of finally understanding what denial can do to a person. 
of finally defining the meaning of you. 
of you and your smile and your forgiveness. 
the strength you've leant peter, even when he hasn't deserved it. 
it's a couple of weeks later, and you're sitting on peter's couch. 
you're there, now, and peter doesn't feel guilty about it. 
he can't. 
he doesn't let himself think about what it means. 
instead, he runs a fingertip up and down the skin of your arm, he tries to pay attention to the movie you're both watching and fails. 
he looks over at you, admiring the light on your face. 
the depths and lights and pictures that a camera could never capture. 
he smiles at you, unknowingly. 
you look over to him. "what?" you ask, teasing voice, a brow raised. 
but you're smiling too. 
peter shakes his head. he tilts your chin up with his finger, getting a better view. 
there's a look on your face that peter never wants to go away. 
there's a feeling in his chest--more than pounding, more than strength--that he recognizes most. 
you mean something to him. that much is clear. 
"peter," you sing, trying to get his attention. 
"what?" 
"you're not even watching the movie." 
peter smiles. "that's okay." 
"want to change it?" 
peter shakes his head, he doesn't need to say a single thing. 
you sigh and look away from him, but there's a grin on your face that peter wants to put in his pocket. 
for a rainy day. 
he keeps staring at you. 
doesn't need to watch a movie when you're right next to him. 
and peter defines it. 
because he knows.
and he's pretty sure--amidst all of the mistakes and lies--that he always has. 
“hey,” peter says.
he doesn’t need to worry about restrictions. about ideas and actions that he’s made.
you smile at him, despite it all.
“change your mind?” you ask him, so very close.
he can feel your breath on his skin. can taste the eagerness in the air.
yes, he thinks,
you wait for him. you stare at him until he speaks. “peter,” you whisper, like a beacon of hope.
like a light to go home to.
peter smiles again, ready.
“i love you.”
*
my masterlist here. 
tags: @moonlarking-blog @v1ci0us @preciousbabypeter @alexxavicry @directioner5life  @inthegetawaycarwithtaylah​ @localrockstargf​
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princessmisery666 · 2 months
Text
The Right Guy On Paper
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Summary: Dean receives unexpected news, and his chosen coping mechanism leads him straight back to you. Part 2 of 3. Part 1 - Just Don't Say You Love Me.
Warnings/Genres/Troupes: angst, mentions of cheating. 
W/C: 4,315.
Characters: Dean Winchester, Jody Mills, Mentioned: Sam Winchester. 
Pairing: Dean x fem!reader (you - no descriptions of body type or ethnicity).
Bingo: @jacklesversebingo Square Filled: A bar - An Arrest - Loyalty 
Betas: @deanwinchesterswitch // all mistakes remain my own.
A/N: I finally figured out part 3 so here's part 2.
Graphics: made by be on canva. Dividers by @talesmaniac89
Master Lists: JAcklesVerseBingo / Dean Winchester / Main
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How did he not see this coming? Well, he did, maybe, but not this soon. But still, how could he have not seen it coming, especially after his last encounter with you? It had been written all over your face; you didn’t want a full-blown commitment or declaration of love, but the hope of some kind of promise was there. He’d shot it down immediately, made a hasty retreat, and hadn’t spoken to you in over a month.
It doesn’t make it sting any less. But that’s all it is, a sting, a scratch. It will scab over, and he’ll ignore the itch. At least, that’s what he tries to convince himself of as he pulls up at Jody’s. 
The door opens as he steps onto the porch. It’s Jody, phone to her ear, and an incredulous look turned in his direction. 
“Yeah, he’s here,” she says into the phone. So Dean assumes it’s you checking up on him. “Yeah, will do. Okay. Bye, honey.”
Dean kisses her cheek, perhaps a little too hard, as he crosses the threshold, heading straight for the liquor. 
“Dean…” she starts. 
He ends it immediately, holding a hand up so she can see it over his shoulder. “Don’t.”
He doesn’t see her surrendering gesture, but he hears it in the sigh she releases over the clink of the bottle hitting the glass. He shoots back the whiskey; it's the cheap stuff and burns more than it should. 
He pours another shot, back still turned, but he can feel Jody’s eyes on him, the worry radiating off her. He won’t tell her he’s fine. She’d see right through it.
“Wanna talk about it?”
He laughs, humorless but amused because Jody knows the answer, yet she always asks on the off chance he’ll give her a glimpse of what’s going on in his head. If only he knew himself, maybe he’d share it.
Another blazing shot warms him from the inside.
He pours another and takes a breath, waiting for the flame in his gut to simmer. But it doesn't, and it’s not because of the cheap liquor, so he concedes, taking the bottle and the glass to the chair. “Who is he?”
Jody sits opposite him, smiling softly. “His name’s Luke, nice guy.”
“Luke,” he tests out the name before washing it away, swilling the liquid around his mouth. This time, he lets the wince show, accepting that it's more than the booze. “He’s a cop, right?”
“Yeah,” Jody confirms. 
He smiles, even feels the fondness in it, but the sentiment dies before he finishes his sentence. “She has a type.”
Jody reciprocates the gesture, reaching over to take the glass from him. “Don’t push her out because of this,” she says, “she’s good for you. Some of those broken pieces didn’t seem so broken when you’d been around her. That doesn’t change because you're not sharing a bed anymore. Let her be your friend.” 
“Yeah,” Dean sighs, “maybe.” 
But he knows he will push you away because he doesn’t know how to be your friend. After all, you’ve never been just friends.
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It’s too easy and not as entertaining as Dean hoped. He’s been on a bender for a few days now. He told Sam he was just stir-crazy, the monsters haven’t been monster-ing lately, and he needs an outlet. It’s partly true. It’s the lack of killing, plus the news Jody delivered a week ago. More so the latter. 
You and Luke are engaged.
Dean thinks it's too soon; it’s only been two months. But then again, what does he know? Maybe when you know, you know. You're no fool. And you didn’t suffer fools. You wouldn’t commit to something unless you knew it was right for you.
So Dean’s been doing what Dean does best, finding distractions to bury his tumultuous emotions. He was looking for a warm body, but when no one caught his eye, he settled for ridding some suckers of their hard-earned cash. 
He’s up three hundred dollars with double or nothing on the line. Though part of the hustle is to appear drunk, as he finishes his seventh, or maybe it’s his eighth beer - he lost count after shot number four and around bottle five  - he thinks he really should slow down. If only for the fact Sam will have to come collect him and Dean doesn’t want to hear the ‘your-not-twenty-six-anymore’ lecture.
His opponent, David, walks around the table, looking for the best angle to take his shot. It doesn’t matter. Regardless of what he does, Dean’s got him in three moves. Or at least he would if his earlier victim, Jason, wasn’t striding up behind him with a furious look that Dean sees in the mirror hanging on the wall behind the table.
“Hey,” Jason calls, a tenth of a second before he throws a punch that Dean ducks.
Dean spins to face him, standing his ground. He can’t back up out of reach cause he’ll hit the wall and box himself in. “C’mon man,” Dean tries, “don’t be a sore loser.”
Jason is already swinging a second punch that Dean recognizes the poor form would likely break his hand had Dean not sidestepped to avoid it.
Two of Jason’s friends are close by but seem reluctant to back up their buddy, so Dean tries to reason with them as he pivots so Jason has his back to the wall, and Dean can back away. “Come get your friend before he gets hurt.” 
That’s enough to convince them to intervene, but instead of doing the smart thing and removing their friend from further embarrassment, they descend on Dean, and he’s left with no choice. 
He smashes the pool cue into the stomach of the first one. The dude doubles over and falls to his knees. The second man narrowly avoids tripping over him, stumbling towards Dean’s perfectly formed fist, and goes down after a crack of bone and a scream of pain. 
Jason looks down at his fallen comrades, and Dean lifts his brow, challenging him.
“Walk away,” Dean advises. 
He doesn’t.
Dean has to give credit where credit is due. Jason is tougher than his withering friends. He takes three shots to the face and manages to land a good right hook to Dean’s mouth before he drops to the floor, rolling into the fetal position when Dean takes a step forward.
He can’t be sure whether he was going to kick the man while he was down. But he’ll never know because two sets of hands grab his arms.
Dean doesn’t think. He reacts. Twisting his right arm free, he throws a punch as he turns. 
“Okay, you're under arrest…” but it’s too late. His fist connects with the jaw of his captor - a blond cop who still has a hold of him.
Dean’s brain finally registers the uniform and star pinned to his chest, and now he’s really in trouble. “Shit!” He grumbles, holding his hands up as the blood trickles from the cop’s nose.
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Dean tells Deputy Callaghan he’s making a mistake and wasting his time hauling Dean to the station. But his suggestion to call Sheriff Mills to get this mess straightened out falls on the deaf ears of the cops in the front of the squad car.
Dean gives up. Jody will have his back, and hopefully, she’s got some leftovers for him at the house. 
“You're gonna feel really stupid when we get in there,” Dean says as Callaghan roughly pulls him from the car. “I’m telling you, Sheriff Mills will have your ass for wasting her time.” 
“That’d be scary,” Callaghan smirks, smug in whatever knowledge he has that Dean doesn’t. “If she wasn’t on a retreat in Milwaukee until Monday.”
“Crap.” 
“Looks like you're our guest until we can get a hold of her, which could be days.”
“Crap.” 
Despite Dean’s lack of resistance, Callaghan makes a point of manhandling him through the station doors. He must want to look tough in front of his buddies and make the dried blood on his shirt look like Dean put up a fight that Callaghan won on account of his being detained.
Dean accepts his fate - for now. He doesn’t want to cause more trouble for Jody to clean up.
But maybe he should have because slipping the cuffs and making a run for it would have been easier than facing you. As soon as the door swings shut, like some kind of magnetic pull, your eyes find him, and you're frozen in place staring at him while some newbie who looks about twelve talks at you.
You hand the clipboard back to the young deputy and march with such purpose toward him he’s expecting a Sam-level lecture, but instead, you look around him. 
Dean’s seen the sneer you unleash on Callaghan before, but there’s an extra layer to it, a venom that spits out with your command, “Uncuff him now.” 
Dean is glad he’s not on the receiving end of your ire, and the station falls quiet. All activity ceases while they watch the show. 
The softness of Callaghan’s voice doesn’t match his words or reasoning tone. Dean can tell this dude knows he’s on thin ice with you and trying to make it right. “You don’t even know what he did.”
“Bar fight at Lloyds. Heard all about it.” 
“He hit me.”
“You're still standing, so it obviously wasn’t hard enough,” you counter, and Dean sniggers, as do some of the other people watching. 
“Y/N,” Callaghan tries again. 
You purse your lips, stubbornness settling in tight. “Release him and get out of my station.” 
Technically, it's not your station, but Dean assumes Jody’s left you in charge while she’s away. He really wants Callaghan to point that out because Dean can see your one smart comment away from adding to the bloody nose Dean gave him.
But you don’t give him a chance to make the mistake of correcting you. “You owe me, Luke, now and forever, so I’m calling in a chip. Release him!”
Silence prevails for a loaded second. Dean turns slightly to look at Luke, jiggling his hands behind his back. “You heard the boss,” he smirks, “I’m a free man.” 
Luke shakes his head and looks back at you. “Whoever he is,” he says, pointing a finger dangerously close to Dean’s face, “he’s trouble.” 
“She can handle it,” Dean counters and winks when Luke finally breaks the stare-down with you.
That’s enough to deflate his bravado a few notches, and he finally turns and leaves, slamming the door open as he goes.
Dean mumbles a thanks while you unlock his new jewelry, suddenly feeling some embarrassment for being arrested. He turns to face you, rubbing at his wrists now that the metal is gone. “Sorry if I’ve caused you any trouble.”
“It’s fine,” you wave him off, “no trouble.”
You stare at one another for a short moment, and he sees how tired you look. He opens his mouth to say it's good to see you despite the circumstances, but before he can utter a syllable, you hold up a finger. 
Leaning around him, you announce, “Shows over,” and the station springs to life again.
“I should get out of your way,” he says, giving a tight smile. 
“Can I give you a ride back to your car?”
He shakes his head, “No, thanks. I’m good. I could use the walk.”
“You got a motel?” 
“Nah, just passing through.” 
“You’re too drunk to drive back to Lebanon.” 
He shrugs, “I’ll find a motel.”
“Here,” you say, fishing in your pocket for a set of keys. “These are for Jody’s. No one’s there. Jody is in Milwaukee, Alex is on vacation with friends, and Clare is hunting in Michigan.”
He makes no move to take them, so you grab his hand and place them on his palm, closing his fingers around them. “I’ve been keeping an eye on the place, but I’m finishing up here and heading up to her cabin. Jody will be back about three tomorrow.” 
“Deputy Dick said she wasn’t back until Monday.”
You roll your eyes, “he lied. He does that.” 
You don’t elaborate, and Dean doesn’t push, but he knows there's a story to be told.
“There’s beer and leftover lasagne in the fridge,” you layer on top of the perks, “and it's closer than the bar. Just sleep it off, please. For me.”
He nods, “Yeah, okay. Thanks.”
“Take care, Dean.” 
“You too,” he says. He wants to hug you or kiss your cheek or something, but instead, he stares at his fidgeting hands. “Um…maybe we can grab a drink soon,” he suggests, “it’d be nice to catch up.”
“I’d like that,” you say, and your smile is genuine and kind when he meets your eyes again. “You know where to find me, Winchester. You never needed an invitation. That hasn’t changed.”
He laughs just as someone calls your name, and you excuse yourself. He watches you cross the room to the same deputy you were speaking with earlier. He really has missed you, but the open invitation dulls the ache a little. He’s definitely going to take you up on it.
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You haven’t been sleeping well lately. It’s understandable; you’ve been through a lot, so you're surprised that you wake just after eleven to the cheerful, chirping bird song. 
It must be the peacefulness of the forest that surrounds Jody’s cabin that allowed the much-needed rest to extend later than usual. You're grateful that she practically forced the mini-break on you - “You need to get away. Get your head straight. Take a few days.” As you step onto the porch with a steaming mug of coffee and the thickest blanket you can find, you realize she was right. 
This is definitely what you need: nature and some quiet time. No hustle and bustle of a busy town, no traffic noise or drunks snoring logs in the holding cells.
Wrapping the blanket around you, you get a whiff of the cotton-fresh fabric softener and wrap it snugger around you as you sit on the porch swing. 
That’s where you spend the rest of the morning and early afternoon wrapped up in the blanket with a book from Jody’s collection. You brought a healthy supply of food with you, and that's the only decision you need to make today: what to cook for dinner. 
You’re two delicious sips into your third coffee of the day when the quiet is disrupted by the unmistakable growl of Baby’s engine. He’s not speeding, and you haven’t missed any calls, so you don’t think it's an emergency. 
Dean cuts off the engine as he pulls up behind your truck, returning the forest to its quiet tranquility, and steps out of the car with a bright smile.
“Hey,” he greets as he reaches the bottom step. 
“Hey yourself,” you grin, finding his smile endearingly contagious. “Everything okay?”
“Peachy,” he says, “passing through on my way home and wanted to say thanks again.” 
He could have called you from the road, so you know the flimsy excuse is the best he could come up with, but you're not upset that he’s there.
You laugh, “You mean Jody asked you to check up on me?” 
“That too,” he admits with a slight shrug.
You feel the hurt constrict your chest again. Jody’s concern is a reminder of what happened. “She tell you why she wanted you to check up on me?”
“No,” Dean says, climbing the few stairs to stand on the porch. “Doesn’t take a genius, though.” 
“Just a sober hunter.”
“Ow, low blow,” he laughs. 
You laugh with him for a second but cut it off with a deep sigh. He will hear the story sooner or later. It may as well come from you. Closing the book and putting it on the table, you ask, “Can you stay for dinner?” 
He claps his hands and rubs them together, “What’re we having?”
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It shouldn’t be as easy as it is to fall back into the familiarity of working together. Dean chops peppers and onions while you put the chicken breasts in the oven. It’s effortless, moving around without getting in each other's way.
You’ve missed it, and from the slight smile that remains while Dean works, you think he feels the same. 
He doesn’t press for information, though you’re sure he’s desperate to know why you're at Jody’s cabin alone and if Luke was/is your Luke owed you big enough to let him go without question.
You wash your hands and move on to making the dough, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Dean. It’s easier to talk that way without the embarrassment of looking at him face-on. Though you know he won’t judge you, you don’t want his pity. Still, you start with an easier question. 
“You have Charlie’s unlimited credit card.” Mixing the ingredients in the bowl, you ask, “So it’s not like you need the money. Why were you hustling people?”
He shrugs. “Needed some entertainment.”
“It work?”
“Yeah, for a minute,” he chuckles, “at least until I got socked in the mouth.”
You see his tongue poke out to lick at the cut on his lip. “Maybe that's what I need.” you wonder, sprinkling flour on the countertop.
“To get clocked in the face?” 
You chuckle along with him. “No, smartass. Some mindless entertainment, forget everything for a while.”
“Like why Luke owes you now and forever?” Dean asks. 
“Nice transition,” you jest. 
“I thought so,” he says, walking to the fridge to grab the cheese along with two beers.
He twists the caps off and tosses them in the trash. He’s started grating the cheese before you decide to tell him what happened. 
“It was good for a while, really good, dreamlike even.” you take a long pull on the beer, and he’s nice enough to keep working, piling grated cheese to the side before continuing to work on the remainder of the block. “But obviously, it was too good to be true. His ex showed up. She’d left him to take a promotion a couple of years ago but decided her career wasn’t all she wanted after all. He made a big show of telling her no and asked me to marry him." The dough takes the brunt of your ire, words punctuated with huffs of breath while you knead it into shape. “He took a demotion to be closer to me. I thought I’d bagged a good one, a real devoted guy. But I was wrong. It didn’t take long for him to cheat.” 
“Glad I clocked him.” 
“Me too.” silence stretches, and you break it by blasting out a long sigh. “I’m such an idiot. I chose the stable guy, the guy that was right on paper. I picked the easy way, and it backfired.”
“That doesn’t make you an idiot.” 
“No?” you question, pausing your work to look at him. He halts his task, too, looking at you fully. “When I found out, I did all the tests, holy water, silver, recited an exorcism ‘cause I didn’t believe he was just a bad guy. If that doesn’t spell out desperate idiot, I don’t know what does.” 
“It doesn’t!” He argues, frustrated that you're talking down about yourself. “But you know what does spell out ‘idiot’? Cheating on someone as awesome as you.”
You cock a small smile, “Thank you.” 
You hold one another's gaze for a long moment. You want to tell him that you would have picked him over Luke, over anyone else, but you know he wouldn’t want to hear it. As if he can read it in your expression, he clears his throat and breaks the loaded stare to turn back to his task.
“C’mon,” Dean says, “Let’s get these pizzas baking and get drunk.” 
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The late morning rise must have been a fluke because you can’t sleep. Considering the half bottle of whiskey you drank with Dean, you're surprised by your inability to fall asleep. 
Maybe that’s the cause of your insomnia, too much alcohol in your system, or the fact that it feels weird knowing Dean is sleeping in the room next door, or perhaps the emotional turmoil of the last few weeks is taking its toll. Whatever the reason, the more you try to force it, the further away it seems to get and the angrier you become. After an hour of tossing and turning, you give up.
You need to do something to occupy your mind and decide to bake some cookies. Once in the kitchen, you realize that using a mixer will most likely disturb Dean, who’s just down the corridor. But now that you’re up, you really want cookies and decide to mix them by hand.
The first batch is just starting to rise in the oven when Dean appears, fully dressed but with messy hair and rubbing sleep from his eyes.
“Crap, did I wake you?” You ask.
“Nah,” he shakes his head, bleary-eyed, squinting under the brightness of the kitchen lights. “Don’t tell Sam,” he says, “but I’m not twenty-six anymore. Indigestion woke me up.” 
You laugh lightly, “There’s Pepto in the bathroom.”
“Found it,” he tells you, clicking the button on the coffee machine. “Then I smelled cookies, so I came to investigate.” 
“Well, perfect timing. The first batch should be ready by the time the coffee’s done.”
He doesn’t speak while the coffee brews, but you feel his eyes following you. You wonder what he’s thinking but know better than to ask. Maybe you truly don’t want to know. The thought of him pitying you fills you with embarrassment despite knowing Luke’s actions are not a reflection on you.
Dean pours the fresh coffee and adds sugar and a splash of cream to yours, sliding it closer to you while you pull the first batch of cookies from the oven and onto a cooling rack. 
He steals one, “hot, hot, hot,” he hisses, juggling it from one hand to the other. Despite the obvious temperature, he takes a bite, huffing out the heat before it's cool enough to bite down. 
He chews three, four times, hesitates, and chews some more. It’s evident from the face he’s trying, unsuccessfully, to not pull that it’s terrible. 
“It’s awful, right?” you ask with an apologetic scowl.
He nods, grimacing, “Disgusting,” he confirms but starts chewing again as if the taste will improve. 
“Well, don’t eat it!” You scold, laughing, “spit it out!” 
He rushes to the trashcan and spits out the chewed-up wad. 
“I’m sorry,” he says, swiftly walking back to grab his coffee and taking a big gulp. “I was trying to be polite, but yeah, that was not good.” 
You know he’s not being purposefully mean. You’ve never been good at baking, and clearly, eyeballing the ingredients didn’t work, but it still hurts a little. You sigh, watching the cookies slide off the plate and into the trash.
You scoop the second batch of cookie dough onto the spoon and into the trash, “I guess I wouldn’t have made a good wife after all.”
“Don’t say stuff like that,” Dean reprimands. “You’d make an awesome wife.” 
Has he really thought about what kind of wife you would be? Why would he? That was never a possibility for the two of you, so it’s purely a reflex, saying something nice to make you feel better. 
You don’t respond, continuing to tidy the mess you’ve made while Dean steps out of the way, leaning his shoulder against the fridge to watch you.
While your back is turned, he asks, “Is that really what you wanted? To be his wife?”
You shrug, wiping down the countertop with a damp cloth. “I don’t even know anymore.”
“You were so career-driven, always seemed happy in the moment. I never pegged you for the white picket fence type,” he comments, sipping his coffee again.
“I never was.” You laugh without an ounce of humor because he has you dead to rights. How well he knows you always surprises you, which in turn surprises you more because that’s what he does for a living. He has to read people. The same way you do - checking for tells and body language of victims and suspects. Dean knows when he’s being lied to. You know you’d never sneak one past him. Yet he doesn’t seem to understand that he was the one who changed your perspective. He was the one who made you believe there was more to life than a career.
“So it was him then?” he softly asks, as if he’s expecting you to reveal a secret. “He changed your mind, made you want it all?” 
The anger and bitterness swell inside of you. Not just towards Luke for promising you a future and then ripping it away, but at Dean for being oblivious to the fact he’s the reason for the change of perspective.
“It doesn’t matter what changed. It’s over now,” you snap, throwing down the cloth and knocking the neat pile of crumbs you’d made onto the floor. “All of it.”
“Why are you mad at me?” he yells, looking slightly confused and standing straighter. 
“I’m not,” you try to backtrack, though your volume increases. “I’m just mad! Mad at Luke for being an unfaithful asshole, mad at myself for falling for it, mad at the universe for giving me something good and taking it away again. And y’know what? Yeah, I am mad at you, Dean! I’m fucking furious ‘cause you changed my mind. You made me realize I could have it all: a career and partner who understood my commitments, someone who was happy to slot into my life when it worked for both of us, and made me see it could be effortless. I didn’t want any of that until we started our thing.”
“Hey!” he shouts back, “I never said never. I said not right now. Or then or whatever.” 
“Bullshit! You said you couldn’t make any commitments, even without Chuck pulling the strings.” 
“Yeah, I meant I needed a minute to process, figure some stuff out. You said we were good. You didn’t want any ‘awkward conversations’,” he counters with full-on air quotes.
“I didn’t want to scare you off!” 
“And I didn’t want you to run off and meet someone new!”
“Yeah, well, that worked out just fucking great, didn’t it!” The anger simmers, and you hold his eyes until he blurs behind your tears.
Dean blasts out a sigh, “Maybe I should go.” He phrases it as a suggestion, but he’s already tipping the remainder of his coffee into the sink, so obviously, he’s made up his mind. 
“Yeah, maybe you should,” you say, blinking up at the ceiling to stem the tears. “I’m really not in the headspace for this right now.”
You keep your back turned while he shuffles around, going to the bedroom to grab his duffle. 
Why did Jody send him? She was the one who suggested the vacation, and she, of all people, knows how much losing Dean hurt you. You’d confided in Jody about the commitment comment, which had been the catalyst for realizing how deep you’d got with Dean and how much it wasn’t reciprocated.   
A chair momentarily teeters as Dean pulls his coat off the back, but the jingle of his car keys is what pulls you out of your own head. 
Tears suffocated and stalled, you find the courage to turn around, but he’s already at the door. “Dean,” you call. He stops and half turns to face you, but you don’t know what to say. It’s too soon to let yourself be vulnerable with anyone, but you don’t want him to leave, at least not like this. 
You stare at him, hoping he can read the words you can’t find in your expression. 
He breaks eye contact, looking down at his feet. “I’ve, er… I’ve missed you.”
It lifts a weight you weren’t aware you were carrying but brings fresh tears to your eyes. “I’ve missed you too.” 
He drops his bag at the door, crosses the room, and swiftly tugs you into a tight hug. “Call me when you’ve figured all this out,” he requests, and all you can do is nod into his shoulder. He kisses the side of your head and rushes out like a gust of wind.
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Part 3 - Just Say You Love Me
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Master Lists: JAcklesVerseBingo / Dean Winchester / Main
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peachesofteal · 7 months
Note
Hello peach hope you're doing well!!
I want to say that I love your writing, i grow too attached to it especially dead disco, you have no idea how it represents my deepest weaknesses and things in me that i never seen written in details that hit the right way, the way that darling is loved and wanted and even cherished by them yet she's so drown in her "what ifs" and worst case scenarios... i don't know if you do requests but my birthday is coming by, and well my birthday aren't the happiest days so every year i act like a workaholic in grieve, so i thought what of darling is like this and both her lovers notice how gloomy and on edge she gets when her birthday approach, how she may fake her birthday dates and never really talk about it when it's one week away...i think it'll hurt good, thanks again! 🩷🤎
⛈️
Hi love! Sorry this is a bit late, if your birthday has already passed, I hope it was okay for you. I usually feel like there’s a raincloud following me around on my own birthday, so I can relate to not enjoying it so much. I hope you like this! 🖤
18+ MDNI brief mention of spanking and praise kink, angst, comfort, emotional issues, Simon is in charge, darling is her own tag-warning / no au / dead disco canon - early relationship
It started with a lie.
A lie you had told months ago, on the patio, glass of wine in your hand. You had been enjoying the summer sun, curled up in your underwear on Johnny's lap, Simon's fingers working circles into the balls of your feet.
"My birthday just passed, actually." Johnny startled underneath you.
"What? How come ye never told us?"
"I don't know..." you swallowed, hard. "We had just started hanging out, I didn't want to make a big deal." The lie is incredible. So many half truths, twisted into something so false.
The reality was, your birthday wasn't for another few months. And you usually didn't make it a big deal, had stopped celebrating it years ago. Once everything started to feel hollow. Once you started to feel like maybe, your birthday really wasn't something to be happy about. Maybe, if you just pretended it didn't exist, it would sting less. Hurt less, when others did too.
"I wish we had known, darling." Simon interrupts your thoughts, and you shrug.
"Next year."
"Is everything alright?” Simon’s hand squeezes yours, drawing your attention from where you’re staring at a book, but not really reading. He can tell. He always can tell. “You’ve been quiet today.”
Your jaw tenses and relaxes with one breath. “Yeah, I’m just tired.” In reality, you were fine. Everything was fine. Johnny was in the kitchen, you were half sprawled across Simon with your paperback. You had a full belly and two doting, loving, warm partners, home, together, in the flat. What more could you want?
It’s hard to explain, the feeling of your impending birthday. The doom spiral that it begins in your heart, the sucker punch that it will deliver the morning of.
The guys don’t even know it’s your birthday, they think it’s not for however long ahead the made up date was.
You can’t decide if it’s worse, or better that you lied. Probably worse.
Will they remember? You never gave them a definite date. Will they push you on it?
You sneak a glance at Simon and realize he’s watching you, studying your micro expressions and picking them apart.
Definitely worse.
You feel awful when you think about how disappointed they’ll be if they find out, how Johnny’s face with twist with sadness, confusion.
You mentally cross your fingers, and hope it never comes up.
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Your hopes are drastically dashed the next day, when you come home to a silent flat, Simon sitting at the kitchen table with his hands folded.
“Hi?”
“How was your day?” He asks and you shrug.
“Fine.” You peer into the fridge, feigning interest to avoid whatever the fuck is happening at the kitchen table right now. “Where’s Johnny?”
“Out.” Out?
“Out where?”
“On an errand. Come here.” It’s a command, something you recognize now, and your mind goes on red alert, chest rattling with a shaky breath.
Your feet deliver you to him on auto pilot.
“You got something delivered today.” There’s a shiny piece of postcard barely peeking out from his palms, glinting in the kitchen light. “It’s from your dentist.”
“Oh.” You laugh, nervously, scratching your neck because you don’t know what else to do with your hands.
“They wanted to wish you a happy birthday. Since it’s on the fifteenth.”
Fuck.
Your brain splits in two. One half of you wants to double down and assure him it must be a mistake. The other half wants to say you’re sorry, burst into tears and crawl into his lap.
“Darling?”
“Yeah… I uh… it’s uh.” He raises an eyebrow and you trail off, eyes finding the floor, hot shame crawling up your spine to your cheeks.
“Why did you lie?” You open your mouth to answer, but nothing comes out. No words, no lies, no rebuttals… just- a void. Nothing.
The walls feel like they’re ten feet closer to you, squeezing in on all sides, bearing down.
“Hey, hey.” His fingers wrap around your wrist, tugging you closer into his body while you suck in a hurried breath.
You can’t do this. You can’t tell him. You don’t want them to know.
“I can’t.” You whisper to your feet, and he strokes a thumb across your pulse point.
“You can’t?” He pushes, like you knew he would. It doesn’t take much for you to fold, and when he squeezes you wrist encouragingly, you break.
“I… don’t like my birthday. So, I lied. I said it was a while ago so you guys didn’t know.”
“Why do you not like it?” You shrug.
“I don’t know. It just always seems so, empty. It makes me sad. When you’re a kid, birthdays are special you know? And then as you get older they just get… worse. It’s supposed to be a day to celebrate but I only ever feel alone. I feel like, I don’t know. Like it’s just sad. And not special.” Your lower lip trembles, but you swallow down the lump in your throat, unable to let yourself fall apart, unable to fall beneath the weight. “I can’t explain it but there’s always a pit in my stomach, the morning of, and I can never shake it. It’s not like my previous relationships even really went out of their way to do something, so I… I don’t know.” You cut yourself off from your ramble by biting the inside of your cheek, trying to ward off a tidal wave of emotion.
“I see.” He pauses, and then wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you impossibly close. “And you were worried you’d feel the same, with us?” You shrug again. “Did you think we’d disappoint you?”
“No!” You blurt. “No, I just- I didn’t want the expectation. I didn’t want-“
“To be let down.” You shake your head with a denial, but Simon only nods, face grave and serious. “You always feel alone on your birthday. Why should it be any different now?”
“Because-“
“Because you don’t trust this yet.”
“That’s not true.”
“You trust us, darling. I know that. Johnny knows that. But trauma is muscle memory. It takes more than a few months with a new relationship to heal the build up of the pain and experiences you’ve been carrying.”
You can feel yourself twisting on the hook of his words. It’s so hard… to believe. To know. To trust but… this. Him and Johnny- you know it’s real. You’re terrified it’s real. It gives you the sweetest dreams and the scariest nightmares.
“I’m sorry I lied.”
“That’s alright, love. I’m not angry.” He watching you closely, cradling your jaw when your lip picks back up with it’s quivering. “But I think you need to feel better. I think you’ve been bottling this up for weeks now, haven’t you?” You suck in a deep breath, ragged and raw. You’re buzzing now, feeling too big for your skin, your clothes, your nerve endings rattling inside your body. “Should we sort it out?”
You nod.
“Words, darling.”
“Yes, Simon.”
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When Johnny waltzes through the front door an hour later with a cake and a dozen balloons, he’s half curious, half elated to see you over Simon’s knee with your pants around your ankles, wide palm smoothing the raw skin of your ass as he hums sweetly to you.
“Shhh, good girl. I know, I know. It’s alright. You did so good for me.” Simon calls over your sniffling. “Johnny, c’mere. I think our girl is ready for her first gift.”
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rainybubbles · 1 year
Text
How do COD men confess to you ?
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Ghost, Soap, Price, Gaz, Alejandro
If you want more context here the part 1, and 2
G H O S T :
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-At the end of your shift, he was waiting for you.
-And Max.
-Because Max was a cute puppy who stole his heart, but he would never tell a soul.
So yeah every day he wasn't on mission. He knew that at 10 pm, he will be at this little pet shop.
-Because he loved how your smile was appearing when you recognized him.
-He loved how you still joked about the ropes he bought or even how when he walked you back home, you were trying to go out of your way to make this walk longer by taking him to the little restaurant.
-This little restaurant, that you chose on purpose, because it has 4 fire escapes, and a perfect view on the outside.
-You knew him.
-And you didn't step back.
-Well in fact you didn't step back when he was just a creepy man who bought ropes at 3 AM, so he -sincerely doubts about your survival instinct.
-So yeah...
-But how did he confess, you're asking me ?
-Well, he didn't.
-Ghost has too many issues to open his heart like this.
-So you decided to make a moove.
-A classic move with a little declaration and a gift.
-Yeah.
.
.
.
-So you bought rope.
-Yeah.
-I know this doesn't sound good.
-It sounds even like the beginning of a horror story but wait.
-You decided to send him a package.
-And in this package you will put a rope tied in a heart form with a letter.
-Telling he took you heart in hostage and you would like him to keep it.
-...
-Seems weird, but it kinda fit your meeting, so it seems like a cute idea.
-Until three months passed and you had no news.
-Not even a letter.
-You didn't panic because sometimes his job was like this, he told you.
-But the problem was you had to move out.
-And even if he had your number, Ghost changed his phone regularly to prevent from some undercover shit.
-Besides your job at the pet shop, he couldn't contact you.
-So you tried to ignore your removal.
-But at the end of the fourth month, you had to admit this relationship will never had an end.
-And you mooved out of the country.
-A bittersweet ending.
-You felt like you were reading a fluff story but forgot to read the tag "hurt/no comfort".
-Shit.
-Maybe next time you should read the tag of your fucking love life.
-Like "a rope man will steal your heart" "angst" "sad ending" "slow burn" "fucking weird story" "not a happy fidelity card guy" "maybe he was into bondage but guess what ? We will never know lol"
-Maybe you were crying when you saw a rope in a DIY shop after this.
-Or not.
-Your dignity and ego will never recover from this memory. (neither did the sales assistant who was just here trying to help you)
-So you tried watching around, maybe the destiny would help you.
-Maybe a tall masked man will appear at your door at 2 PM, under the rain saying he has always loved you and....
-And you don't open the door for your own mom because you're too scared that she could be someone pretending she's your mom so you hoped he wouldn't do this.
-Yet two months after your removal, you had a call from your previous boss.
-You usually avoid calls, but you knew he wouldn't call you if it wasn't important.
-So you answered and...
-He was telling you a package with your name was delivered to him.
-And when you asked what was in it.
-He answered.
-"A fidelity card for rope, with a yes on it."
-You never smiled that hard.
-(Ghost found your new contacts thanks to Lasswell later, to confirm you both confessed to each other.)
S O A P :
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-You had kept in touch.
-Through letters and some texts, when Soap was allowed to send them, you started to have a great friendship.
-But lately in the memes that Soap sent to you, you found a lot of references to the French girls in general.
-Firstly you didn't pay attention.
-Until that night.
-When you saw Titanic again with your parents.
-And it clicked.
-The French girls scene !
-By you stopped.
-Why would Soap make implicit reference to this ?
-Then again you remembered his drawings.
-He sent you some of them in his letters.
-When you get back to your home, you gathered them, looking if maybe he had made a portrait of you or had made a joke that you didn't see.
-But it was just random sketches.
-You stared at Ghost sketch eating an ice cream when you noticed something on his mask.
-He had a "W" on it.
-You searched through the sketches and...
-"U to the mow, I go you will" you said out loud after collecting the letters and tried to figure out what he wanted to say.
-And you tried to understand it.
-But except this fucking "mow" and "will"
-You didn't find any coherence in it.
-Did he want to ask you to mow his lawn in his garden ?
-But he didn't have a garden.
-And why a "U" and then a "You".
-Why, why Soap would even do this ?
-He was not the kinda guy that do this.
-"...I think I'm too stupid to find out this shit." you admitted.
-Well maybe your French girls scenes will not be romantic.
-So you texted him saying, you understood he sent you a message.
-But you didn't find how to translate it.
-And he texted you the answer.
-"Will you go out with me ?"
-...
-"Did Price give you the idea Soap ?" you answered.
-"Wait, you didn't answer."
-"Did Price give you the idea ?"
-"You think I couldn't be a romantic, love ?"
-"I think we're both too stupid to create a thing like this, love."
-"... it was L.T"
-"he...Ghost ?"
-"Yes."
-"...did he love titanic ?"
-"he had a collection about it."
-"...wow."
-"yeah."
-"To answer, yes, I would love too. But never ask again advice from Ghost, I don't want to end on an iceberg."
-"Yes, love."
P R I C E :
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-Soap and Gaz with a broken arm led to your confession.
-They were both drunk and knew their captain had a thing for you, and it was reciprocated.
-Especially after Price offered you some chocolates to make clear he was interested in you.
-But nothing was happening.
-So with some scotch, and very bad ideas, Gaz and Soap decided that their time to shine had coming.
-They were the Cupids of the base.
-And what had Cupid ?
-Wings.
-If they used their wings to bring you from your office to Price at the bar, then he would be happy and more relaxed in this context, and maybe he will confess.
-Yes.
-Except.
-They didn't have wings.
-So when they jumped out from the roof.
-Their arms broke.
-And who was the doctor at the base ?
-You.
-You didn't go out because you were busy to treat their arms.
-"Maybe we need some bows next time." Soap whispered but it was more like he shouted in Gaz's ears.
-"And some white underwears! Cupid has that. I'm sure if we wore this, it will work for sure." Gaz answered.
-"And what about not jumping from the roof and not drinking that much, hmm ?" you asked.
-"Sssshhhh, we're in a confession plan right now. You can't stop us." Gaz said trying to put his finger on your mouth but ended up to do it on the wall next to you.
-"I'm calling Price to take you back to your bed, you're both too heavy for me."
-"We could walk."
-"It's not walking the problem Soap. It's where you could go."
-"hmm."
-So you called Price.
-The problem was he asked you why.
-Why did the boys jump out from the roof ?
-You blinked.
-He would know when he would come here.
-So you decided to gather some courage and-
-"They try to make us confess by bringing me to the bar with you. But they believe they were angels and could fly."
-The silence was so loud.
-He hung up.
-You sighed.
-Well at least, you said it.
-You didn't expect a yes, but at least an answer would be the minimum.
-When later, you heard a knock, you didn't make the effort to look up.
-You heard Price taking the boys to their beds and the door closing.
-But few minutes later, you heard a knock.
-Surprised, you stood up.
-Maybe someone else has drunk too much and-
-"John." You said surprised.
-"I intend to ask you out with some roses, and tomorrow but I guess two drunk soldiers with broken arms beat me."
-"The experienced strategist beat up ?" you joked.
-"I guess so. I'm sorry it was done like this, love."
-"I don't care honestly. As long as it's you asking me."
-He smiled and took your hand slowly.
-"Well, I can't wait for our first date, then."
-"'Hope Soap and Gaz will not be there."
-He laughed.
-"I can't promise that." he smiled.
G A Z :
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-A meme.
-He sent you a meme.
-To confess.
-But you never answered him.
-And when he saw you, you never talked about it.
-So...he understood he was rejected.
-And he was okay with that, hell it was normal.
-He just thought it was reciprocated because you had what seems like dates with him.
-Maybe he mixed up signals.
-So he just never talked about it again, because he didn't want to make you feel awkward.
-But one day during lunch, he heard Soap talking with you.
-"So you got a new one, uh ?" Soap asked.
-"I didn't have the choice. His ass fucking destroyed the previous one."
-Gaz stared at the floor.
-He didn't know you had someone.
-Maybe that was because you never-
-"L.T has a cake, that's for sure." Soap joked.
-Gaz suffocated.
-You-
-And Ghost-
-And Ghost's ass-
-"That's not funny Soap. He fucking destroyed my phone just by sitting on it. It's not a cake. It's a fucking breeze block at this point."
-Your...
-Oh.
-oh.
-FUCK.
-He realized.
-You didn't ignore him.
-You hadn't see his message.
-"How does it happen ?" he asked to be sure of his conclusion.
-"I just let my phone on a bench, and he sat without looking, that's it. But because his ass is apparently more solid that my relationship with my father, or even the fucking Vivelle dop gel, he broke it."
-"Fuckin' hell". Gaz said
-"You can say that again. Why are you asking, by the way ?"
-"I sent you a text and you never answer, so I was wondering why."
-"Now you know. But I will answer, I manage to transfer my data and texts on my new phone."
-Gaz didn't feel well now.
-Soap was here.
-And your phone in your hand.
-Meaning he will see your reaction in live and with a public.
-Like he was on the set of a TV show. But here he could gain your heart and not $100,000.
-But you didn't say anything, neither did open it.
-You just sit and talked with him and Soap like it was not important.
-Because of course you couldn't know what was his text.
-So he waited.
-All the day, for you to open this fucking meme.
-To see it.
-And at midnight.
-He received a Mister Worlwide saying yes.
-Never he was so happy to see this bald head
A L E J A N D R O :
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-He had everything planned.
-The moment, the place.
-It was going to be a big thing.
-He talked Rudy about it and even the 1-4-1 during a mission.
-Because Soap teased him about you.
-So he explained how he was going to ask you out and-
-Laswell stopped him.
-Their communications were not over.
-She heard everything
-And when Laswell ordered you to tell the location to Price
-He understood you were on their mission as a technician, and you heard all of it.
-The only thing that could kill Alejandro is Alejandro after all, right ?
-Even when it was dying of embarrassment.
-He mumbled some insults in Spanish and tried to hold his head high.
-He had everything planned, and just a microphone ruined this ?
-No,no, no, no he refused.
-He met you because of those mics, how they dare to betray him like that ?
-He ignored this and finished the mission.
-But on the way back, he heard your voice.
-"Good job guys. By the way I would love going on a date with you, Ale. If you needed to know after...this."
-You know the smile he did, when they interrogate Valeria ?
-It was one hundred brighter right now in the car.
-Soap even wore sunglasses to protect his eyes.
-Alejandro was so fucking happy.
-Maybe he did not hate the mics.
-Even though he's persuaded that someone hacked them this particular day.
___
If you want more : here.
I'm sorry that it took so long to post this part, but when I posted another COD about how you meet Farah, Alex and Konig I had a comment saying it was shit.
And I know my English sucks, so I deleted it and hesitated to write again..
Maybe I need some readers to help me, or maybe this comment was just hateful, I don't know.
In any case, sorry for the mistakes, English is not my first language !
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jienem · 9 months
Text
The Deal of Unfortunate Soul
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Y/N is penniless. Between jogging the school works, having to watch out for Grim in case he does something out of control while The Prefect is away, and recently surviving from the overblots, the headmaster still didn't give them enough money to manage the ramshackle, let alone for their food. She took on some jobs to help them, such as delivering some packages or helping the school cafeteria to help with their savings, but it wasn't enough.
Grim, being the cat he was, stole the money she had kept hidden under the bed unnoticed until she came to look for it only to find out it was gone. She came storming to Grim who only denied it with an innocent look on his face, completely different from his attitude. She noticed a great number of cans behind him as he attempted to cover them with his small figure while avoiding eye contact. But it was too late, and he knew she knew as she narrowed her eyes and stood at his level.
"No tuna can for a whole month, you got me?"
"Funyah! No! What did I do to deserve that?!" he exclaims as he still tries to deny it while his ears are folded. She knew he was feeling guilty, but none of the money he had spent would ever come back.
"I can smell tuna on you grim, don't deny it. Two months, you hear me?"
"Tw-two months?! No, I will not allow it—nyarhh, it hurts!"
Y/N pinches his cheeks and carries him into her arms as he struggles to get out of her hold.
"Now, now grim. Don't you want to spend time with me? Being away from your beloved canned tuna wasn't as bad as you think."
"Huwah! Yuu! Y/N is bullying me!" grim screams as y/n finally lets go and launches himself at Yuu, who has only returned as of now. He looked grim first before looking in her direction, while his expression turned into confusion.
Y/N sighs in defeat before explaining the situation as they sit down on the couch. Yuu's expression changed into one of sympathy as he patted y/n shoulder. She calms down after a while as they chatted when Grim moves to y/n, apologizing with tears flowing through his face. Y/N cradled him close while calming his tears before he fell asleep on her shoulders.
"I'm sorry for not helping you with the bills y/n." he apologizes after quite some time. She shook her head before turning her head toward the ceiling.
"No, you've done enough, it was the least I could do." Y/N knew he had enough on his plate. Like her, he was studying often late at night, always around Grim and the adeuce Duo, being the only person in the group with a braincell, attending the dorm meetings as they handled the school activities; it wasn't easy.
The first time they have appeared here, they are mocked for being magic-less. Y/N and Yuu always covered for each other when they threw something at them as they passed. It wasn't easy, and meeting the adeuce duo was no different; they often got into trouble while dragging Grim and Yuu along with them. After the events later on, the two of them still relied on each other, with grim at their sides.
"We will manage, just like we always do." she mumbles.
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"Oh? This is a surprise. What can I do for you, y/n?" 
"Is your housedorm leader here?" 
Jade greeted her at the counter with his signature smile. She wasted no time asking him as she made her way toward him. The lounge was quiet, save for a few costomers at the table. The background music was orchestral, with a soft tune perfect for relaxation as she walked towards the inside.
She hasn't set foot here in a long time since the Scarabia event, where Jamil overblotted. She was often busy with all of her schedule until now, when she saw a flyer on the school board with a hiring sign. The amount of wages was higher than her previous two jobs, even if they doubled together. Alas, she was desperate, and here she was.
"Of course, do you want me to notify him?" 
"Please do,"
Jade bowed before leaving, y/n sat down on the bar stools as she waited. Her eyes landed on the clock nearby before glancing at the VIP door, where Jade went. Moments passed as she waited, her teeth sinking into the flesh of her cheek as she stared hard. They are taking too long.
"Nee Koebi-chan, whatcha starin' at?" a voice spoke behind her ear, breaking her revery, and she clined her head quickly to the new intruder whom she didn't hear coming. A familiar teal hair color with one long streak of gray framing his right side stares down at her grinning, revealing his sharp teeth while her eyes widen.
"Floyd? What are you doing here?"
"How sad Koebi-Chan. I was right behind you when you entered, didn't you hear me earlier?"
She in fact forgot that he was at the door earlier while she went in, she was so focused on the paper that she hadn't noticed everything in her surroundings until now.
"I suppose I did. Hah..." She breathed. "Floyd, can I ask a question?"
"You just did silly," He remarked, watching the gears running into her head while her expression changed, amusing him.
"Okay ah, are they always taking this long?"
"Azul and Jade? I don't know~"
"Floyd, didn't you get assigned to serve the customers?"
"Ehh, I don't feel like it."
Y/N made a small laugh as Floyd's expression turned downcast the minute Jade asked him.
The mostro lounge was soon beginning to be busy as more students walked in. Jade had to convince his brother on behalf of Azul to serve the costomers, but to no avail. He walked out of the lounge and went somewhere else as Jade sighed.
"My apologies for making you wait; Azul is waiting for you in the VIP Room."
"Thank you."
Y/N walk towards the door and knock. She waited for his call before heading inside. The noises soon became silent as the door closed from behind her, and the air had become noticeably colder.
From behind his table, he gestures for her to sit down as he writes something on a piece of paper. She could guess it was a contract from the glowing paper.
"Dear y/n, how may I help you?"
"The flyer on the student board, Are you still hiring?" 
She watches as he hums before putting down the quill. He laid his elbows on the table and pillowed his chin with the back of his hands. His eyes lowered just a little, and his signature smile graced his lips.
"I'm sorry to say the least, the slot has already been taken since yesterday, though I do have another job that wasn't taken just yet." His eyes watch her plummet in a split second before her face becomes unreadable.
"What's the catch?" y/n pursed her lips. Azul lowered his arms and pulled out a folder from his desk before handing it to her.
"Darling, if you don't trust me, read it yourself to your heart's content."
She took it from his hands and read the contract. It seems pretty simple enough; the only job she has to do is sort the papers and often handle managing the members from their post. But she was confused as to why he needed someone to do that job. Wasn't it classified?
She heard shuffling from his desk but didn't lift her eyes. She only lifted them when she was done. She saw Azul checking his contracts on his desk with a focused expression; his eyes darted from text to text until he felt her stare at him.
He turned to her and smiled. "Have you made up your mind?" 
"I do, but before that, I have questions I'd like to have."
"Sure, anything you'd like to ask."
"What is the point of this contract?" she asked softly, his face was still unreadable as she grew nervous.
"I need someone I can trust to do the paper work here in the office, you see, I was quite busy managing the Mostro Lounge, and don't get me started with Floyd." Azul made a pitiful expression causing y/n to furrowed her eyebrows at his display.
"So you specifically made this contract just for me?" she jest, yet he took it seriously.
"Well technically no, but after the recent tragedy that befell us, you are one of the few people I could count on other than the twins, for that matter." His evil smirk took place as he took the contract into her hands. "Plus, don't you need some madol to help your living? My records show here that all of you are dependent on the headmaster's unfortunate savings." Tell me, how does that help you?" he added.
Y/N was lost for this one. He was right, and he knew it, no, he was fully using it.
"So what do you say? Do you agree?"
She knew full well what she was bargaining for, and the risk of doing something from azul but her situation calls for it. for the sake of Yuu and Grim, she had to. Just a few weeks, it was all over.
"Your lucky I was an unfortunate soul for this one," she finally relents, and with determination she knew would be gone after, washes over her. "The contract, let me have it."
"Hehehe... As you wished."
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