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rebeccadumaurier · 10 months

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will martha wells dare to imagine the end of capitalism? and other thoughts on system collapse (and the rest of the murderbot diaries)

I'm writing this post because the wait for System Collapse is killing me and I need something to do. These are not so much predictions of specific, concrete events—I am terrible at predictions and bad with plot—so much as exploring existing thematic arcs in the series and tracing them to what I think are their natural ends. (Also, this post uses "bot" and "construct" interchangeably because I'm lazy. Sorry, MB.)

Some points I think the rest of the series (SC and onwards) may hit on:

Further development, and let's say "stress testing," of ART and Murderbot's relationship, and bot/construct relationships in general

Every day I go insane about this conversation MB has with ART early in Artificial Condition, which is not very subtle foreshadowing:

[ART said], My crew always considers me trustworthy. I shouldn’t have let it watch all those episodes of Worldhoppers. “I’m not your crew. I’m not a human. I’m a construct. Constructs and bots can’t trust each other.” It was quiet for ten precious seconds, though I could tell from the spike in its feed activity it was doing something. I realized it must be searching its databases, looking for a way to refute my statement. Then it said, Why not? I had spent so much time pretending to be patient with humans asking stupid questions. I should have more self-control than this. “Because we both have to follow human orders. A human could tell you to purge my memory. A human could tell me to destroy your systems.” I thought it would argue that I couldn’t possibly hurt it, which would derail the whole conversation. But it said, There are no humans here now.

But in the future there will be humans who could tell ART to do something undesirable to MB (technically, NE already did this to some extent, but it didn't fully address the issue). Artificial Condition in fact explicitly notes ART doesn't have a refutation to that particular argument, and that's why they can't trust each other. We get some initial glimpses in Network Effect of this—ART makes its own decision to save Murderbot, and thankfully its crew agrees with the plan, but we can't expect ART and its crew to be in agreement forever.

Frankly, a lot of ART's plans seem to rely on either (1) its humans / the people in charge of it agreeing with it or (2) them not being around to disagree, which is going to be a problem sooner or later, especially as Murderbot's view of humans is not as ... positive as ART's. Network Effect dances around this problem because both the Preservation people and ART's crew are good people who largely support ART and MB in their decisions, but I don't think that will always be the case.

(Side note: I am once again thinking of Murderbot's surprise that Don Abene allowed Miki to override her orders in Rogue Protocol, and the bot spectrum of "cannot disobey orders literally ever" (like SecUnits) to "can disobey orders in the right circumstances" (like Miki) to "can mostly just do whatever but ultimately bots still have their programming" and how MB views ART's place on that spectrum. Also I am once again begging Murderbot to please reflect more on Miki's death, but given its current level of emotional repression, I am not optimistic about this.)

Leading me to my next point—

The question of ownership, independence, and property in the Murderbot universe

As Murderbot has mentioned various times, the people of Preservation call themselves "guardians" of bots rather than owners, but it's still very much ownership (and MB is right to point this out and express discomfort about it). MB knows it's fortunate that its owner—sorry, guardian, Mensah, allows it a ton of freedom, but legally, MB is still Mensah's property. Mensah's approach is a single, individual band-aid in that it may (for now) allow MB to live a life more or less of its choosing, but it doesn't address the larger systematic issue that actually, owning these bots is fucked up and many people exploit the bots they own, including people who think that they're already being incredibly generous and goodhearted simply by not abusing bots. (I'd need to go back and review, but I got the latter vibe from many of the Preservation bot owners in Fugitive Telemetry.)

Martha Wells seems like she will address this larger issue later. I don't know how, but I'm sure "Murderbot gets dragged into it and has to *gasp* talk about its feelings" will happen somehow, since that recurs frequently.

What healing from trauma looks like for a bot/construct

Dr. Bharadwaj has already suggested that Murderbot could use therapy ("trauma treatment" but like ... sounds like it's therapy combined with some other self care / community care strategies), and Murderbot is not subtle about its whole "I have been through many horrific things but I will pretend it's totally fine and not a big deal" coping strategy. I'd be interested to see what role ART plays in this—it's quite scarred from the events of Network Effect, will need to heal, and is unlikely to do the "yeah whatever that's just what my life is like" strategy MB adopted, because that's not what its life is like.

(Side note: in NE, MB says being taken over by targetControlSystem "would be like having a governor module again. No, not again. Never again." To MB, the loss of control ART experienced is similar to what MB's life was like every day until it hacked its module. I'M SO. 😭)

But therapy for a bot would look very different from therapy for a human, and I'm doubtful there's any therapists out there equipped to handle it. The "nicest" humans, if you will, seem to be the PreservationAux citizens, and they still have a long way to go on their understanding of bots. Also, much like in real life, therapy is not a cure-all for everything and there's a lot of terrible therapists, issues with psychiatry, etc. I will not get into—so I'm not actually saying that Bhadwaraj's idea of "trauma treatment" is the specific route MB will take to heal, I'm just curious what it's gonna take to get it to open up and be willingly emotionally vulnerable.

Who is Murderbot outside its day job? (aka its hypercompetence with regard to security)

One of Murderbot's defining traits is that it's an incredibly competent person, even when (often especially when) surrounded by much less competent people. The Goodreads blurb for System Collapse implies this won't always be the case:

But there’s something wrong with Murderbot; it isn’t running within normal operational parameters. ART’s crew and the humans from Preservation are doing everything they can to protect the colonists, but with Barish-Estranza’s SecUnit-heavy persuasion teams, they’re going to have to hope Murderbot figures out what’s wrong with itself, and fast!

My first reaction is: "hey, why is Murderbot the only one who has to figure that out?!" (Not that I think ART or the humans are jerks who don't care about its problems or don't want to help; I think Murderbot has trouble asking for help or even imagining people want to help it, e.g. its assumption in NE everyone just left it behind to die when it was captured.) The inherent question with characters who define themselves through their hypercompetence at something is: who do they become when they can no longer rely on that? (For example, who is a star athlete when they get a permanent injury? Who is a brilliant painter when they go blind? etc.)

ART already had to grapple with that to some extent when it lost control of itself in NE and couldn't rely on itself or its crew, so it resorted to kidnapping MB to fix the problem. But that doesn't deal with the larger identity crisis / struggle for self-definition at play, which is essentially: Who is Murderbot when it's not useful, when it's not able to do what it was created to do?

Speaking of which, this is very relevant to my title question—

Will we see Martha Wells envision the end of capitalism???

The Murderbot Diaries is the story of a single bot and its friends / enemies / etc., and I'm perfectly happy if it stays that way and focuses on MB's internal journey. But Martha Wells seems like an ambitious enough author to imagine wider solutions to the problems that plague the Murderbot universe, which is namely that corporations are evil. If corporations were not so evil, we wouldn't have our corporation-hating traumatized-by-corporations created-by-a-corporation-and-struggling-with-it protagonist. There's indentured servants in Rogue Protocol. There is literally a space version of the Underground Railroad in Fugitive Telemetry. It is impossible to understand this series without understanding that it is a very, very vicious critique of capitalism, and without this critique laying out its foundations, we would not have most of its characters, including Murderbot itself. Preservation is already a first step in that it seems to be some sort of utopian commune devoid of corporations or privatization—which is a huge step in itself, that Wells envisions a world devoid of capitalism—but it's one small (and still imperfect, re: earlier discussion of treatment of bots) planet in a large, dysfunctional universe.

So far the series has been Murderbot dealing with individual evil corporations (GrayCris, Barish-Estranza, etc), but mainly in the context of one crisis at a time, with regard to saving only its friends / clients. (It's fine with leaving Eletra to Barish-Estranza in NE, for example.) I do not think Murderbot will singlehandedly destroy capitalism or that its goal is to do so—it's not a fix-everything save-everyone hero, no one is, one of the points of the series is that you should not attempt everything alone—but this series has done plenty of exploration of the evils of capitalism; I would like to see Martha Wells explore how we could end it.

#murderbot #murderbot diaries #meta #ange.book #this post ended up just being really abstract and high level and many rhetorical questions #(some of which i have my own answers to in what i'd like to see but i'm not that confident in anything and i think martha wells has a #more interesting imagination than i do anyway)#(i want HER answers)

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zaacoy · 1 year

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Hmhmhmmm in a silly mood and thinky thinkin about Tang Legomonkiekid again, some disjointed tang thoughts!! Because I can :3

Author's note after writing: another long post!!! I am incapable of talking about him without going on and on and on apparently, enjoy the novel!! hehehheehoo

so! The scorpion queen demoness outfit still has not left my brain!! I am plagued by the ourple apparently, just

why he so littol

microscopic organism

its like he's a cat getting picked up by the scruff!! those clothes are too big for he goddamn he!!

Also also! The buffet scene!! We get two wide shots of it

the first:

and the second:

assuming it isn't some sort of custom to have your servants(?) or whatever the ladies are in this scene leave once they set the table (if it is then feel to ignore this tidbit!! :D) Them being there in the first scene but not the second makes it seem like? Tang requested them to go and let him eat in peace without 7 different women watching him while doing so??? This man is invulnerable to women and I find that so funny all he wants are his noms

Adding onto that the fact that his first move when he wakes up to a pretty lady standing over him is to SCREAM and push her away is SO unbelievably funny could you be any gayer sir

also can we just appreciate how easily this man crumbled the second good food was put in front of him. after being kidnapped and abducted by some clearly suspicious demon lady he just. willingly stays, unbound physically in literally anyway, just because she has good food to offer. very very silly he is so funny

no additional comments just look at him

he is so scrunckly so silly, I forgor all of the other Tumblr silly words but he is all of those too

its nice that we got to see him come back in purple later tho in S4

It's a dustier purple for sure but it still looks pretty nice on him :3c

also also!!

I love this little training scene sm because it paints tang in such an interesting light

whereas pigsy and mei are borderline ready to jump sandy for that star all we get from Tang is a shaky "I want that", this difference is further exemplified in the coloration differences (mei and pigsy's eyes being red whereas Tang's are just whited out)

this trend continues as the training session goes on! here for example we can see mei and pigsy clearly furious whereas tang is just crying- they're all frustrated! It seems as though when Tang is confronted with the issue of "not being as good as his peers" he trends more towards upset rather angry unlike the rest of his friend group

This can also be seen in their individual trainings

Mei is outright violent in her training arc, both in regards to the props and opponents she fights and (verbally) to master Subodhi, pigsy is also fairly mouthy and standoffish at first and disregards whatever he perceives as an insult, but Tang on the other hand we get to see crumble a little bit. Rather then brushing off master Subodhi's gripes with him like the others Tang seems to take it to heart, getting visibly more and more miserable until he's able to turn himself around

It's a nice bit of characterization that I'm glad to see appear again, they've given him such a consistent, well written weakness I can't wait how it affects his performance in future episodes, be it for better or for worse heeheehoo

I ADORE how much this man loves food, he's so super enthusiastic about it in literally every season it is completely adorable

I also appreciate how they didn't turn it into his entire character!! Most of the food-loving characters I've known have their entire personality based around food which, while it can be joyful at times, is kind of boring and 2 dimensional imo. I enjoy how they made him a complete fully fleshed out person like everyone else who just so happens to really like nomnoms heeheehoo

looks at you with my autistic eyes

that expression is so goofy and the silly little noise he makes with it too uehhshdhhdj he is so sillay

love how he gets sparkles/shines in his eyes once he gets really excited about something or the "✨" shaped eyes

there are so many little things I love about him that NOBODY else talks about and it makes me so so sad where are my fellow insane-about-tang-lego-monkie-kid people where are uu 🥺 "let's take ibuprofen together" but it's "let's talk about a fictional Lego for hours" instead please plsss

cough- anyways uh- he has a bunch of little vocal quirks that I love so so much like!!

(I don't know how to get audio clips so you're just going to have to take my word for it ueue)

Often whenever he exclaims or screams he does so in a way that I don't know how to describe actually mmmmm instead of an "AAAAAH!" it's more akin to a "WHAhaHAA!" if that makes any sense, whatever that is it's such an interesting verbal quirk I love it very much.

He does something similar in quiet exclamations of awe, instead of going "ooooh.." it sounds more like "ooohohooh.."

I guess it's like his voice falls in between dragged out sounds? Like if it weren't for his tone and the context they'd almost sound like laughs, it's definitely an "h" sound, I'm not sure if there's a term for that verbal quirk but it seems fairly unique to him in the show and I thinks it adds to his sillyness heehee

squints at you squints at you squints at you squints at you squints at you squints at you squi

The bbg pose is consistent and here to stay!! yahoo!!! I wonder how many times while raising mk did they manage to tire themselves out and have pigsy later walk in to both of them asleep on the floor euhdhsnns fluffy family

while I'm thinking about noodle family here is your daily reminder that this scene exists in canon and mk has two dads thank you for coming to my ted talk

His tone of voice was so funny here the pure PANIC in his voice manifesting in a very strained yell was so well done here weehee

Circling back to the scorpion outfit, remember in the pilot episode how mk attempts to crawl away from the demon bull family after he gets caught? Tang does the exact same thing here!! same motion same thoughts process, like father like son

soft squishy tang isn't even my fault anymore LOOK AT HIM, he very squish

delving into slightly more serious tang thingies for a second!!-

this scene always felt incomplete to me, I feel like I'm missing something. This was when they first as a group run into lbd on their airship. Out of the entire group Tang is the only one to notice something's off and emphasis is put on this multiple times. First with "I've got a bad feeling about this pigsy", then with scene above where he's shown staring skeptically at lbd's rings, and then with him noticing the broken device on the ground(and notably not cheering on mk like everyone else) and confronting mk about it. Was ALL of that really just so Tang could make mk tell them about lbd(which he didn't even really do)? Why tang, why was he the only one to intuitively notice? even mk didn't know something was wrong with lbd when he first encountered her in her hostess form, heck even monkie king didn't, how did tang? Triptaka/golden cicada powers? Are we going to be seeing him do this again? Does it mean anything for where his story is going?? I don't know it just, it feels like too much focus was put on this just for it to be for nothing, it's odd to me.

One more thing!!

what was this.

from the second episode we see macaque where he puts on a shadow play and possesses tang, pigsy, and mei n' forces them to fight mk. Never in the entire rest of the series have we ever seen someone who's possessed struggle/ appear to still be there whilst being under possession. Not with the people-turned-spider-demons not with bai he not with mei or pigsy in this scene, not even really with wukong in the special. It is arguable through his expressions that he may be somewhat still there and might be putting up a fight(especially when he's about to hit mk) but we never really seem him underneath. We never hear him and we never see his true reaction underneath the poker-faced-possessed version, never like we do with tang here. Once again, just, wjajnajj, why?? This is such an odd little detail and it's so weird how it never comes back again. If it's not foreshadowing or leading up to a bigger reveal then why animate it? Because it looked interesting? Because they could? Was it a way to express to the audience that his friends were still there under the surface and they weren't just clones? But the lights in the lantern along with them getting sucked in already made that pretty clear. If that was the case anyway, why didn't they do that with wukong? or with bai he? or with the spider demons? we had no way of knowing for sure that they were there or they'd come back after being un-possessed either. It's such a small little thing that could mean nothing but it's been stuck in the back of my mind since I first saw it back when I first picked up the show in like august. I don't know, it's cool though!! I hope they do smth more with it

It is!! 4am!!! I have to be up at 7 tmrw oopsies

ending it here gnnn if you read through all of these rambles then hiii!!! Glad you find me losing my mind over a Lego entertaining I sure have fun doing it, have a good day byebyeye :3

#This silly little Lego man is all I think about anymore #He never leaves he is stuck in the forefront of my brain permanently #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #Lmk #lmk tang #long post #I am realizing more and more as I sit down and actually process my thoughts on him that we are unnervingly similar #either a.) I'm projecting onto Tang so much that I've completely altered how I perceive his character and I am widely mischaracterizing him #or b.) I am accidentally and unconsciously becoming more and more like him everytime I think about him #or ig c.) I just so happens to be super similar to him and am only just now noticing it #Ohhh wait is that what a kin is? Do I kin a gay Lego do I really #I dunno but that's a problem for future zaacoy not awake-at-4-am-on-a-school-night-zaacoy gooooodnight #Zaacoy rambles🌙

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cielcreations · 7 months

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Murder Drones AU Prompt (Featuring SoliTango/Rancher Duo)

AN: First off, if you haven't watched Murder Drones, go watch it. It's on YouTube, there's going to be 8 episodes and, at the time of writing this, 6/8 are out and it's really good, really nice animation, really cute. It can be a bit confusing at times, but it's honestly just adorable and I love.

This is the equivalent to the pilot with some changes and simplification for story/prompt purposes. Idk if I'll make a fully fletched out story, but who knows? Maybe.

So, Tango is a Worker Drone and, like all Worker Drones, has to hide behind three doors so the Disassembly Drones don't, ya know, MURDER them? That's no fun. But he also HATES it because while they're working on creating a better future and all that, they're also sitting ducks just waiting to be attacked.

So, he creates a weapon that's missing one part that he knows he can find outside. He manages to sneak out of the doors and finds the part he needs, but is attacked by a Disassembly Drone! He uses his weapon and manages to completly shoot it's head off.

However, it GROWS BACK and his weapon is reloading and- he tries to smack the other with the butt end of his weapon.

"Now, now, that's not very nice!" The other huffed playfully, winking. Tango notices that one of the lights on his headband are red instead of yellow, indicating an error, "Oh! Are you new to our squad? You seem kinda.... short."

"Wha- You're only, like, a few inches taller than me!"

"Yeah, true, I suppose... Besides, G is super short but- OH!" He put his hand up, saluting Tango, smiling, "I'm Serial Designation Solidarity! Nice to meetcha!"

"Oh, uh, I'm... Serial Designation.... Tango?" He lied.

"Pleasure to meet you, Tango!" Solidarity took his hand, shaking it kind of violently, the other gasping a bit, "Allow me to give you the tour and explain things before Grian and Pearl get back from hunting! They're also part of our squad!"

Solidarity explains the Disassembly Drones' purpose to Tango, who counters saying this isn't good, and before more discussion could be had, but the other two Disassembly Drones (Grian and Pearl) come back before he can and Tango manages to sneak away. Tango runs back to the door and tries to close it behind him, the other Worker Drones confused. Before the door closes, a sharp tail stabs into the button, Tango gasping and turning.

Solidarity was in hunting mode, smirking as he licked his lips.

All of the Worker Drones begin running to escape the murder and to hide behind the second door. However, Solidarity is quick to kill them all as Tango tries to work his weapon, which is still reloading. When it's finally done, it's too late.All the other Workers who were in the first door are dead and the second door is closed. Tango holds up the weapon to Solidarity.

"I won't miss, this time." Tango hissed.

"I'm sorry, I really enjoyed our time together, but I can't have you shooting my siblings with that." Solidarity growled, kicking the weapon out of his hand and stabbing the other in the shoulder.

Tango groaned and glared at the other, seeing him hesitate, "W-Well? Go ahead..."

Solidarity clenched his fist, still not moving. However, they heard footsteps and Solidarity threw Tango over his shoulder, hiding him in the snow as Grian and Pearl appeared. They praised him for getting past the first door, saying they could use the vents to get past the rest. Grian was the first to jump and go, pearl gently ruffling his hair. Solidarity faced Tango, who was trying not to move to seem dead before looking at Pearl, who was also getting ready to leave.

"Pearl..." Solidarity hesitated, "Not that I can't wait to keep murdering all the Worker Drones, but... do we know what the company plans to do with us? You know, after?" A question Tango asked him.

"Excuse me?" She asked.

"I-I just mean... Well, if they hate robots... and we're robots... What's going to happen to us afterwards?"

"S..." Pearl walked forward before pinning him to the wall, glaring, "Worker Drones are corrupted. That's why we're here. How many times do I have to tell you this?" She hissed, "Don't make me kill you. You know what the code says and I'd hate to have to do that to my brother."

"R-Right, sorry..."

Pearl let him go, "You, stay back. Don't get anymore funny ideas while Grian and I take care of this." She then left through the vents.

Tango came out from hiding as Solidarity slumped to the ground, "...You okay?"

"I... I'm kinda the useless one." Solidarity explained, "When you said all those things, I couldn't help but think about it and... yeah. I've always been the one who was curious and questioning things and Pearl should have killed me long ago, company policy and all. But... we're siblings and... as tough as they are, they care about me... Even if I mess things up. Messed up your doors and your friends are gonna get killed..."

"Yeah, they are. If we just stand here doing nothing." Tango offered a hand, smirking, "Wanna team up?"

Solidarity blinked before he smiled, "Sure! Sounds fun!"

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darklinaforever · 2 months

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Yes of course... You clearly need to get the shit out of your eyes cleaned. If while Daemon is having sex with Rhaenyra you see him making a quick deal even though it's explicitly quite slow and gentle (makes sense since she gave birth not long ago) I don't know what to say other than that shit in your eyes must be powerful once again. And like I said before... As if he hadn't squeezed her thigh in his hands ? As if he didn't caress her face again before resting his forehead on hers ? Oh and if you watch from 1 minute and 14 seconds to 1 minute and 17 seconds Daemon actually puts his arm under Rhaenyra to hug her too. So he's also hugging her as much as she's hugging him. Then as if the sex itself hadn't been slow and tender ? Saying that he's done with sex with her as soon as possible is the biggest bad joke I've seen. 😂

So... Rhaenyra was 19 years old. An adult then. But the information is clearly having trouble getting to the brain... Laena was 16 years old, marriageable for the time of Westeros. You don't understand what a feudal / historical context entails do you ? The fact that a man of Daemon's age would marry a young woman of 16 years old is not shocking in context. It's inspired by fucking feudal times. If you want to accuse Daemon of being a predator for marrying a 16 year old woman, complain about how society worked at the time. No Daemon. Otherwise you can also complain about almost all the men of the time! And it had nothing to do with predation! Idiot... But given your level of understanding I imagine that for you all men of that time were predators... Also Laena was 22 years old in the book. Not 16 years old. In the series and book Mysaria is a fully adult woman. Rhaenyra may be younger in the book than in the series when Daemon asks for her hand, but depending on the era, Rhaenyra was also of marriageable age. Whether it's the series or the book, the women in Daemon's life therefore have varying and different ages, they are not all located in the same youth age group that you promote to try to make him pass for a predator attracted specifically to young girls. You really look ridiculous at this point. Honestly, thanks for proving that you know nothing about the book Fire and Blood and basic feudal society. Oh and at the risk of annoying you... Nettles has never been proven. And never will be in Fire and Blood.

I've seen both versions of The Borgia series, and Cesare & Lucrezia don't have any toxicity ? Lol. They do, just in a different way than Daemyra from the series. Also I repeat Daemyra is not grooming, book and series. On the other hand, the only thing I can say with certainty about Cesare and Lucrezia's love is that compared to all the crap that goes on in this series and their family, they are definitely pure in comparison. And what do you do with Hades and Persephone ? Literally one of the healthiest relationships in Greek mythology ? 😭😂

For the thousandth time, I obviously know the definition of grooming and historical context and you don't. Dameyra is not a grooming book and series.

Oh and Daemon didn't kill Rhea Royce in the book.

And since we're staying on the series... it's hard to understand that Rhaenyra is 19 years old in this fucking episode 4 and 5 ? An adult and not a child !

You must really have a shitty life to come and repeat the same shit over and over again anonymously as if it's going to change anything in reality.

You don't need a doctor ?

You almost never talk about Criston Cole and the other men. Stop pretending to care about Rhaenyra. You're literally the type of person who says you can't wait to watch her get abused over and over again. Daemyra is not grooming, I literally for the thousandth time wrote a huge article about this but YOU ARE DEAF ! You don't understand the definition of the word and what a historical context implies. You are a bunch of idiot butchers. I never denied the toxicity of Daemyra in the series, non-existent in the book because again HISTORICAL CONTEXT ! Once again, go read @horizon-verizon it might educate you. And I NEVER claimed Daemon was Prince Charming. What do you not understand about a gray and complex character ?! Unless for you a gray and complex character is in fact incapable of loving a woman and having a healthy relationship with her ?!

Oh, and I have already said I don't know how many times that I recognized that Daemyra had toxic aspects in the series version, except that, so what ? This will prevent me from shipping the Daemyra version of the series maybe ?! No. Love is not necessarily something pure, we have to stop the bullshit, especially in fiction. On the other hand, I maintain that there is nothing toxic in the book version. There is no such thing as a brothel. It's an invention of Mushroom. There is no voluntary abandonment of Daemon for 10 years. In reality he was banished under penalty of death. There is no Daemon leaving Rhaenyra to deal with childbirth alone. He was by his side in the books. There is no strangulation either. And once again, the age difference and or the incest aspect are not real arguments as to a possible toxicity in their relationship, due to placing the relationship in its fictional and historical context from which GRRM draws inspiration, namely the feudal era, where age differences and incest were included in the customs of the time for specific reasons. Especially if we are in a family where incest has no impact due to their MAGIC BLOOD ! These elements are not evidence of toxicity. Open a history book. An age difference and incestuous marriage in a historical context does not necessarily result in toxic abusive relationships. This is bullshit.

So basically, I'm right when I say that you don't read my responses and just repeat the same shit over and over again ! “Acknowledge that Daemyra is toxic” I've said I don't know how many times that they were toxic in the show's version. Honestly, go get treatment for stalking my account like a crazy person. Are you interested in me at this point ? Sorry, you're not my type.

See when I say they repeat the same shit over and over again without wanting to hear it ?! Real parrots. Clearly I must really be a bridge to have so many trolls coming to see me. The antis have small brains. What do you think Daemon ?

Yeah, that's what I thought...

@aleksanderscult

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yellowlaboratory · 1 year

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Hi!! What are your season 3 thoughts?? And most importantly, what are your Jiara related season 3 thoughts? :D

alksjdfhlaskdfj i have. so many thoughts. i've never ever written something short so uhhhhh.....stick with me, lmao.

first, non-jiara thoughts:

cleope was SO cute!!! i wanted to wait for the writing to convince me on them as a ship because I really wanted something more than "these two aren't with any one so lets put them together" for cleo and pope and I've been completely convinced. They both bring out a different side to each other and the way Pope opens his family and his home to her is just alkdjfhlksajdfhlkajsdhf it's unbearably sweet. i love her interactions with the heywards and i love how instantly she fits in. the scene when he leaves her in his room and she does a tiny dance and then falls back on his bed and says "thanks, pope"..... yeah i think i was cosigning on that ship as soon as I saw that asdklfjhaskdfl. and the scene in 3x06 where she stops him from shooting rafe and he cries in her arms.... oh my god. it single handedly saved that episode for me. AND THEIR KISS???? oh my god.

i also LOVED Cleo's friendship with JJ. When they are on a mission together, they are right there with each other. and, speaking of friendships, I loved that we got more JJ & John B, best friends since third grade content. the fact that they physically started fighting... idk, I think it just made them feel even more like brothers to me.

i also just really loved some of the (for lack of a better term) girlboss moments this season. there are SO many moments that i was loudly cheering for my girls. Cleo having the only brain cell like 180% of the time when Kiara is kidnapped. Kiara betraying rafe and stealing that boat (i was fully cheering ala kiara during the cliff jump scene like that is my GIRL) (also madison bailey the woman that you ARE the way she never even a little bit played into the r*ara of it all. any time Rafe looked or spoke to or was in the general vicinity of Kiara, she looked SO uncomfortable and I love that for me). and I really REALLY loved Sarah manipulating Topper lmao "you're such a giver" "it's just how i was raised" KLAJDHLAKSJDH

and, actually, I think the inculsion of topper in the heist was super funny and exactly the type of shit i want to see from him (if wheezie had been there to give him shit, it would have basically been any fic i've ever written with topper in it). when topper is being used purely for comedy, he's kind of a genius character - Austin North can deliver those bat shit Topper lines really well, and the rest of the characters (particularly Kiara) react SO well to him. he's so easy to make fun of!!! but then.... having Sarah go back to topper again was uhhhh not it. I think they should have kept the s2 or the s3 stopper storyline in, but not both. sarah going back to something that reminds her of a time when her life was easier while shit is absolutely hitting the fan and she has nothing else is like, very much in character, and that's what happened both times. the fact that they didn't show her growing through that in this season, but instead regressing..... idk, i'm excited to see a Sarah with more growth. also, canon comedic topper is dead to me forever after burning down the chateau so, i guess that's a loss on both fronts (i can't talk anymore about the chateau burning down but i have a lot of feelings about it).

i really hated big john. i'm so sorry, but looking back, John B should have left that man in the fucking bell tower. I think the amount of screentime he took is my biggest gripe of the season (i did a scrub of the show for just jiara scenes after my first watch and the amount of times i had to scroll by that man.... my god). and not only did he take up a shit ton of screentime, he kept John B away from the pogues - both physically and emotionally - for most of the season (the lack of goofy happy pogues moments is my second biggest gripe with the season). If you've read pltc, you know that I had a lot of thoughts about Big John and his relationship with the pogues but...... when he died (actually, this time), it was only dry eyes here lmao. I feel bad for John B, obviously, but everything (and i mean EVERYTHING) Big John did this season was so shitty for John B, I can only say that i think John B is better off without him.

i think the thing that has me the most conflicted is the 18 month time jump. narratively, it makes so much sense - and logistically, aging up the characters as the cast ages makes a lot of sense. i don't love that we'll miss alot of jiara and cleope but I'm coming around to the thought of it all by opening ao3 and waiting for those time jump fics to pour in. @ josh pate if season 4 opens with JJ slamming Kie against a wall as they're making out i'll forgive literally everything, i'm so easy to please.

i guess this is the perfect transition to the jiara of it all. the first few episodes literally bodied me. every interaction on Poguelandia bodied me - the way they were living their poguelandia/surf trip dream, the "just like we talked about", the angsty silent conversations they were having when they saw the plane. kiara getting kidnapped hit - I think the way JJ was so focused on getting her back was so perfect, the dock hug was actual literal perfection. I am a Hug Girl first and foremost and oh my GOD?

the first almost kiss floored me. i did not expect it. the transition from their dumbass little jokes to almost kissing.......... i'm gonna die. i literally fell off my couch. I think Pope being the one to break it up was inevitable, as was their conversation. idk how i feel about it, i know pope was always going to have opinions on jiara and i'm glad it wasn't super salty but.... i'm gonna need to rewatch it a few times i think.

episode 4 absolutely ended me. those conversations and the way Kiara knows JJ and the way JJ was imploding.... absolutely insane. the framing of that episode (like the actual cinematography not the writing lmao) was not my favorite, but the content was SO good. it was everything i wanted I was losing my mind. JJ telling Kiara she's a kook HURT. Kiara knowing that he's lashing out cause he's scared made me yodel. the talk in the chateau's yard about truces immediately followed by another almost almost kiss made me want to scream into a pillow. 10s all around.

I also love Heist Jiara. I loved seeing JJ at the carrera's house for the conversation about the cross, and the way he's a little bit like a caged animal around Mike is perfect!!! Him self destructing by stealing the money clip is just literally JJ 101. Jiara bike ride to Kilby Girl is now my entire personality!!!!!!!! also the fight about the money clip - that's not really about the money clip at all - followed immediately by JJ almost dying and Kiara being like "don't you ever do that again" is just aksldjfhkasjdfhlkjasdhlfkjasd i could YODEL.

the gate fight absolutely took me by suprise. the "i love you dude" was not what i was expecting AT ALL. JJ's buffering reaction and the way he's trying to downplay it was 10298/10. the hurt in kiara's face made me want to cry, and then John B fucking everything up feels... well, a little inevitable. I also love that even in their angstiest, jiara is still together, and in episode 8, they are sitting on the couch and kiara's playing the ukuele LIKE. they are best friends. they are so important to each other. nothing is ever going to change that. I also love love love the part where he's like "i'll tell you on the plane." idk it makes me feel buzzy.

episode 9 is a literal fucking feast. the feral jj, the way he KNOWS something is up when she doesn't show up, the way he drops everything and then ends up in kahoots with Barricuda Mike to get her back. "I kind of got a date" ????!?!?!?!??!!!!! then the whole thing about Marley the cat (josh I KNOW you are on the ao3 tag just drop me the username please) and Kiara immediately knowing it was him as soon as she heard "blond". the "me?". the KISS. the giggly happy in love couple that they are!!!!! i do wish the kiss had better lighting for my giffer friends but i know we're gonna get the brightest kiss in the world in s4 to make up for it (pates make it happen!!!). and i think my favorite scene of the entire season is them being so happy and giggly on the plane and the high five into a handhold alkdjsfhlkasjdfhlksadf.

episode 10 is obviously a drop off lmao. it sucks to leave the season on that note but we did get the "it's an adventure baby" and little background moments. I'm happy the pates didn't write themselves into a corner too much this season, and in a lot of ways I'm really glad that jiara is open ended because that means there's a lower chance of unnessecary bullshit being thrown our way really early on into s4. i would have liked a more definitive ep 10 moment but ultimately, espeically since we know we have s4, i'm not concerned in the slightest about it.

so, overall, i think there were parts of the season that felt slightly choppy (personally, I'm of the belief that they filmed a lot more than we saw), i think the first half was generally stronger than the second half, and I think i'm really, really fucking glad we have s4 confirmed so I don't have to stress about it even a little & we'll get to filming sooner. my sanity is hanging on by it's fingernails but it is in fact hanging on.

at the end of the day, i had the time of my life watching it and i had some really great people to share it with and I'll always be so unendingly grateful for that!!!!

#outer banks #obx #obx spoilers #obx s3 spoilers #jiara #my thoughts are all over the place (CLEARLY)#this is just my general brain rot if you have specific questions i might have half way intelligible answers #i'm sure i'll have more thoughts and I'll probably change my opinion on some things with more time #but here we are!!!

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sunnyyyyyyyynnus · 1 year

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Ok so I finished Wednesday on wednesdaay (very funny ik) but it took me till now to fully process everything that happened so now Imma rant about it

Tyler Galpin to be specific

HE IS SO FREAKING HOT AND FOR WHATTT

Okay okay from the beginning

So after that first scene with Tyler, I honestly couldn't tell if Hunter wasn't a great actor or if Tyler was just shy

of course after like 2 episodes it was obvious he was a good actor buuuuutt i still wasn't entirely convinced

tiiiillll the last 2 episodes

ESPECIALLY THAT SCENE

YEAH THAT SCENE AND IF YOU'VE WATCHED IT THEN YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT

HOLY SH!T

SERIOUSLY THO I WAS JUST SITTING THERE HANDS OVER MY MOUTH AND THE ONLY THING ACTUALLY STOPPING MY FROM SCREAMING WAS THAT I DIDN'T WANT THE NEIGHBORS KNOCKING DOWN OUR DOOR (again)

AND USUALLY I HATE THE CHARACTERS AFTER THAT OR I'M JUST REALLY UPSET THAT THEY TURNED OUT LIKE THAT

BUT I JUST CAN'T HATE HIM

IN FACT I'M SO GONE FOR HIM IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY AT THIS POINT

ok ok gotta calm down

been screaming in caps for a while

alright change of topic

now about the rest of the show cus I don't have the energy to write two seperate posts

honestly what i love about the show is how every time I'm so sure about something it's like "haha you thought you was smart bish well guess what"

but I did have some predictions that turned out true

like about Thornhill

from 2nd episode i knew she was gonna try and kill Wednesday or something

she just seemed too nice and there to be a good character

and when they wanted us to think that Weems was the killer? no way i didn't believe it for a second

and i had a feeling that tyler was the monster around 6th-7th episode

still didn't lessen the shock

but I did think that Xavier was behind it for a while

i thought that maybe he drew the monster and brought it to life but i had doubts cus when he brought the spider to life and Wednesday smushed it it disappeared into smoke

so after coming to that conclusion i was positive it wasn't him

okie then now about the ships:

now i know everyone is shipping Wednesday and Enid

but i just don't

there's this feeling i have when i think a couple would be great together and i just don't have it with them

but i do ship Enid and Ajax i just think they're really cute together

i also shipped Wyler really hard until the final episode

don't get me wrong i still ship them but i also have this feeling that i won't anymore

still waiting for s2 to decide on that ship

i also think Bianca and Lucas i think his name was would make a cute couple

(sorry for my terrible transitions from topic to topic)

but there are a few scenes i keep replaying

like when Enid hugged Wednesday and Wednesday pushed her away a bit before hugging her back tightly? MAH HARRT CAN'T HANDLE EEETTT

and when Tyler was all like "What does it feel like...to lose?" HUNTER IS SUCH AN AMAZING ACTOR THAT JUST THE TINIEST CHANGE IN HIS FACIAL EXPRESSION AND POSTURE HAD THAT EFFECT

and when Wednesday started crying cus she thought that Thing died

I STARTED CRYING CUS I THOUGHT THING DIED HOW DID THEY MANAGE TO MAKE A HAND ONE OF MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS

anyway that's all i think thank you for bearing with me love y'all have a great rest of your day

AND IF YOU HAVE NETFLIX BUT HAVEN'T WATCHED WEDNESDAY YET THEN WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FORR

#wednesday netflix #wednesday 2022 #wednesday #wednesday addams #tyler galpin #Sunny rants #enid sinclair #ajax petropolus #xavier thorpe #netflix #principal weems #hunter doohan #jenna ortega #sorry for the rant

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thecatduet422 · 2 years

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Okay, final thoughts on House of the Dragon, Season One:

Pros:

Time Jumps: I think the time jumps were handled beautifully, tbh. Reintroducing the characters in episode 6 by treating it as a second pilot was a *great* idea and it paid off very well imo. I understand some people are put off by the time jumps, however, without the time jumps it'll take us 4 seasons to get to the *actual war lol.

I understand that some people may find it hard to keep up with all the characters being introduced, but then again, a fantasy series is always going to have extra lore/history that you have to know in order to fully understand/appreciate the work. You can't just watch something like GOT, LOTR, or even Harry Potter and expect to know everything from the movies/tv show alone. You gotta do the homework. It sucks, but thats why these types of series are so big. Theyre entire worlds.

Opening Theme: Keeping the main theme, but changing the map to the Targaryen bloodline was another great idea. No other opening theme was gonna top the original, so you might as well own it. Plus, its fascinating seeing the more children born, the more bloodlines that are drawn, hinting how its all gonna spill soon. Also side note: the soundtrack *slaps*. Once again, Ramin proves himself to be a fantastic composer.

The Acting: Everyone in the cast is amazing. Everyone, from the younger cast to their older counterparts. Special shoutouts to Paddy and Matt for doing wonderful. I really want to see Emmy noms for them. I thought Emma did fantasic as well, and i cant wait to see what she does throughout the rest of her series. Episode 10 was really her moment, and she took full advantage of that.

Some characters are done really well!

I point specifically to Viserys, Daemon, and Aemond. And I think thats because those are the characters in which the writers really embrace their moral ambiguity. Theyre not entirely good, their not entirely bad. Their complicated. Which brings me to...

Cons:

Inconsistency with the main characters (and their relationships)

Now, it seems like what the writers are trying to do is make the Civil War seem very messy and complicated 'cause there is no *right* side, so to speak. Shit happens, and violence breaks out because of it. However, in order to do this, it seems like they rely to much on the good side of the main characters, with the people around them being the ones prompting them to do the bad shit.

Alicent: I see this the most with her. They write her as a nice, honorable, and dutiful lady during her younger years, showing how she's *trying to patch things up with Rhaenyra, and she honestly sees her as the future Queen up until Viserys' death. Its implied that Otto is the main bad influence on Alicent, that he's the one pushing to usurp the throne, not her...The only problem with that is its inconsistent for when we see Alicent's Karen-like behavior in episode 6, cause Otto isnt there. The dude got banished, remember? If the main characters only do the bad things when the men prompt them to, then what about the times when they have to be bad and the men arent there?

Rhaenyra: The writers really painted her as the heroine of the season. The one who was done wrong, and dont get me wrong, she was. But also, I feel that the writers missed out on a good opportunity to point out how Rhaenyra's rebelliousness is the cause of her downfall.

Really, the only time we see this come to play is with her sons and the argument of their parentage. But that rebelliousness is always painted as a "good" thing, cause her and Laenor arent in love. They paint Rhaenyra's rebelliousness as a good thing as well when she expresses her sexuality... But what about when that becomes a bad thing? Like, when she's taking advantage of her very honorable knight?

The writers played into the idea that Criston Cole was just bitter Rhaenyra didnt run away with him, but thats not what I got when I first saw the scene? When Rhaenyra sleeps with Criston in episode 4, we see him ask her quietly to "stop". She doesnt. Rhaenyra is the Princess and Future Queen, and she's gonna take what she wants, and because of her station, Criston has no choice but to comply.

This causes the honorable Criston Cole to feel such intense shame and guilt over the act, that he convinces himself its out of love just to give himself a sense of peace. Only when he finds out it wasnt out of love but just for a bit of "fun", he's absolutely shattered. And thats what causes Criston to switch sides. Not that he's "bitter" Rhaenyra didnt love him, but that she took advantage, made him break his vow, something he cherished, all for a bit of fun. Thats what makes his character growth more interesting and realistic imo. To play him as just a rejected douchebag only works when he was a horny, misogynistic douchebag to begin with and he wasnt. He was portrayed as honorable at first. Decent.

Rhaenys: Look, the dragon moment is episode 9 was cool, but Rhaenys not killing the greens at the moment did not make sense. I understand later she says "It's not my war to start" I can get behind that, except that in the writers commentary in episode 9 they go against that by saying its because shes a mother and just "didnt wanna kill another mother" ... Like, please be consistent with your motives...

And even then, its like... you can argue the Rhaenys still hasnt picked a side in the war yet, but didnt she already do that when she let her granddaughters get engaged to the Strong Boys? And she did this in front of the King, so shes not just gonna go back on it. Thats not her. And If the greens are coming after the Strong Boys, then by extension, theyre coming after her granddaughters, so... why not just kill them? Idk...

So... in conclusion, embrace the bad side of the female characters! Quit trying to place them as the good guys, with the men around them being the "real" influence. Let the ladies be the bad guys too!

And in case anybody is thinking, has HOTD passed GOT?

I dont think its right to answer that yet. I dont think its fair to compare the two when we only have one season so far. Remember, seasons 1-4 of GOT were considered the *best* of television when it first came out... and then look what happened. I think its best to hold out until we get to the end.

#hotd #hotd spoilers #catduet thoughts #house of the dragon #house of the dragon spoilers

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dimonds456 · 3 years

Note

*sees your tags about being salty about suf spinel*

YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT AND NOT SHARE YOUR SALT /LH

Okay, but I'm warning you, you asked for it.

LONG POST WARNING.

LIKE A REALLY, REALLY LONG POST WARNING.

Dimonds456 Presents: How They Did My Baby Dirty: An SUTM and SUF Analysis on Steven and Spinel (Told by a Progressively More and More Angry Narrator)

THE CONTEXT: There was a post talking about how you think a character will fix everything, but then they wind up making it works. My tags were "#*looks at suf spinel* #I am still salty about that like the bitch I am fghdjskgfa"

Grab some water, guys.

Let's start by talking about Steven for a moment. In the original show, when we were following him as a 12-14-year-old, we watched as he built up trauma and then learned how to hide it expertly well, to the point that most of the audience didn't even realize he was struggling.

You can actually pinpoint the seconds he makes those decisions, too. The best example is in "The Test," when he's storming up to the gems. He's pissed. His fists are clenched, he's got that anime eye shadow overlay on his face, he's frowning, all that. the Crystal Gems are clapping for him and lying to his face, and he KNOWS they are because he overheard them talking about how it was "impossible for him to fail" that test (- Garnet).

And yet... he also overheard them saying that they're just trying their best. They don't know what he needs. They never really have. No one is sure. So, Steven realizes that by picking a fight, he would just be making it worse for them because they would know they messed up, and nothing gets solved, and everyone gets more depressed and Amethyst and Pearl go back to fighting each other and- well, you get the picture. He doesn't have a full understanding of what's going on, so his kid brain went "so I can either be angry at them and cause problems, or I can tell them I did a good job to make them happy."

"I can lie to make them happy."

He storms down there angry, still mulling this decision over. He drops to the floor, frowning and pissed, and says "I can't believe you guys." He is so close to yelling at them, and yet, when he looks up at them...

"That was so... INSANE!"

You never would have been able to tell. It was right there. That moment. And then he never stops. For the ENTIRE REST of the series, he NEVER STOPS. He puts the Crystal Gems above himself every time. Think Rose's Scabbard, The Message, The Return/Jailbreak. The Cluster. Peridot. Dealing with Jasper. The zoo arc (ESPECIALLY the zoo arc). Aquamarine. Then pretty much the entirety of Season 5.

(NOTE: I went back and rewatched that scene for the screenshot. There is a blink-and-you'll-miss-it lip tremble in there too! D,: )

He lives for the people around him, and not for himself. Almost never for himself.

Put a pin in that.

Now, let's look at his maturity. People thought that was just him being mature, right? That he grew up. No. That was not it at all. He was learning from his own behaviors as well as the people around him, and building up this idea that he had to "fight to be everything that everyone wants [him] to be when [he's] grown" (- Steven, the extended intro).

Yes, he matured, but not because of that. He started making various decisions to benefit the group that oftentimes he wasn't fully comfortable with, but something he believed would be better for everyone.

Put a pin in that.

Then, later in Future, we see it all manifest. He is selfless to a fault, to the point that he can't think of himself in a positive light in the sense that he's good. We see it a couple of times, but especially in "Prickly Pair," when he vents to Cactus Steven about everything that happened. He feels useless, which is taking a toll on his mental health.

"Why do I need to be needed?" He needs to be needed because that's everything he was as a kid. His entire IDENTITY rests on his ability to help other people, no matter what happens to him. He literally sacrificed himself for them countless times (the big one of course being the Aquamarine incident), and now as a teenager, his whole sense of self is wrapped up in this need to get up and do something to make the world better.

And when he can't make the world better, his world falls apart.

Put a pin in that.

Now, let's talk about Spinel, the moment we've all been waiting for.

Spinel, as a gem, was made specifically to be a friend. That is her niche, and her purpose. Her reason for existing. At first, she and Pink Diamond got along very well, as shown in the flashbacks right before Drift Away plays (I headcanon she has illusion powers and was literally projecting her trauma, but that's a completely different post).

She and Pink vibed together for who knows how long, until one day, Pink started to not like being around Spinel anymore, finding her annoying and childish. We don't know what really caused the switch, just that it did happen (but of course, I have headcanons for that, too). Spinel never realized until it was FAR too late.

Steven actually describes his younger self as annoying at one point during the Diamond Days arc, when he decides to throw the ball, so I'm legally allowed to make this comparison.

Steven and Spinel were the SAME. They were both young and dumb, and something that at least a few people found annoying. People put up with their BS though, since they cared about them. But, while Steven realized this and matured because of it (or bottled up his emotions, to each their own), Spinel never did. She never matured. She was never given a chance.

In the movie, we saw her as a child, and watched as she played with Pink and never tried to be or do anything else, to the point that Pink Diamond thought to realize she might be struggling (and maybe Spinel didn't, either!).

She lives for the people around him, and not for herself. Almost never for herself.

And when she can't be friends with this one person, her world falls apart.

Sound familiar? It should. I literally pulled from things I said earlier lol.

Spinel and Steven are mirror reflections of each other. Reset!Spinel is 14-year-old Steven, completely devoting her entire self to one idea. Steven's was helping others no matter what, Spinel's was serving Pink no matter what. Spinel is like a combination of 14 and 12-year-old Steven in this sense, honestly. Goofy, without a care in the world, except one thing: the people around her. She would do anything for Pink, just as Steven would do anything for his family.

Now, Pink Diamond left Spinel. We all know this story. She left Spins there in the garden for 6,000 years because she grew more mature and started a rebellion, effectively forgetting about this one gem she kinda stopped caring about standing there.

Personally, I don't think Pink had any malicious or even intentional intent in that, but this ain't about her. This is about how Spinel continued to sacrifice herself for Pink, even when Pink didn't need her to anymore. She wanted to please Pink 24/7, all day every day, to the point she self-sacrificed and stood perfectly still for her for millenia.

Now, back to Steven. The gems don't need him anymore in Future, right? They've all grown up and matured and headed off towards their own futures, effectively stranding him alone in terms of self-identity and self-worth. But he stays there, ready to assist at the drop of a hat, or- in Future's case- the call of a phone.

Episode 6 anyone? The one everyone says shouldn't be in Future? That it should have been cut to allow more focus on Steven himself? The fusion episode? YEAH. THAT. He is running himself RAGGED to try and help others, to give himself a purpose. He is self-sacrificing. (He's a professional, don't worry. /j)

Steven metaphorically planted his feet down and decided that he was going to devote himself to the people around him.

Spinel's feet were literally tied down soon after she made that very same decision.

Okay, enough with the backstory. Time for the salt.

In Future, Steven is at his lowest low. He is running to the Diamonds for help, to see if there is SOMETHING they can do to help him. And we first see Spinel.

Spinel has been through the ringer on a lot of the same mental problems Steven himself is facing. She self-isolated, watched as everyone grew up and left her, and then began to lash out because of it. She understands what he's going through. We even see her concerned as Steven starts to tell her why he's there.

Spinel takes him from Diamond to Diamond, until he's running out of White's room in a blind panic. Spinel is able to catch up with him, and Steven realizes the same. SHE GETS IT. He turns around and says "Hey, you used to have vengeful thoughts!"

Spinel replies "Ohhhhh yeah, but I don't have 'em anymore."

"How did you make them stop?"

She then goes on to sing Change to him, effectively cutting that conversation short.

On paper, that sounds very in-character for her. She's goofy! And that is what worked for her! But the problem is that they had to dumb her down in order to make that character decision work. In the movie, she was shown to be observant and able to put two and two together, even if she often jumps to conclusions (see her being the one to figure out that the gems needed to remember their "pieces," as she remembers the Garden, her re-realizing what Pink did, and her meltdown later when she reactivates the injector).

Spinel is smart. It should have been in character for her to realize that Steven was panicking just as she had been, and needed to be talked to gently. But no. Instead, she starts belting out Change, which given Steven's situation, would not work for him.

At the very least, she would have started doing little tricks or started trying to get him to join a game, which would have taken his mind off of it (to her anyways, that wouldn't have worked either), which then could have prompted further discussion.

Then, once they finally start talking, Spinel could have been able to share some legitimate advise. She was hurt and lashed out. What worked for her was opening up to others and letting them in, learning to trust again (which Steven also has problems with- he can't trust that the Gems won't break down the second he turns his back. Trust does NOT equal love, there is no doubt he loves them to no end), and allowing other people in.

That is what Steven needed, too. He needed to let his guard down and just talk to someone. Sure, Spinel was not going to be a fix-all, but she could have at least offered some insight on what to do.

She UNDERSTANDS him. They are a reflection of each other.

But instead of offering help, Spinel made it worse. She was dumbed down to allow the rest of Future to happen, to make Steven feel even worse. Because- and here's the kicker- because the one person who MIGHT understand him doesn't, that means there's no hope for him.

At least, that's how he sees it. And so, the denial- and "Everything's Fine"- begins.

Here's the thing, though; they DIDN'T NEED to make that decision. If the Crew wanted to have Spinel not understand Steven, then draw the line of her being a Gem from Era 1, used to the Diamonds shattering people.

Steven has killed Jasper and revived her at this point, so maybe Spinel offers that at least he's trying to get better, just like the other Diamonds! See, they're doing so great now! And then that makes him feel worse since he IS trying to do better, but is only failing, while the Diamonds- who were MADE to be nasty dictators- are doing better than him.

The Diamonds shattered a lot of people, and they're doing better than Steven, who has only shattered one person, and not even on purpose. How horrible is that?

Then boom. THERE'S your angst, with a much smarter, more helpful Spinel.

Look, I knew going in that Spinel wasn't going to be able to help. The finale had to happen somehow, and we hadn't seen Wormy Boi yet. I have always been a storng believer of the corrupted Steven theory, so I knew it was bound to happen. But I was hoping that Spinel would at least try. But she really didn't. She just brushed him off, offering really loose advise that didn't even fit his situation and thinking that would be enough.

No. It's not.

I can see where the Crew was coming from. I still love that episode, and I love seeing Spins in it (until that exact moment). This is probably the only thing in SU that genuinely gets me mad. Or, well, maybe not mad, but definitely annoyed and- you guessed it- salty.

I have an unfinished fic where I kinda delve into Spinel's head for that episode called "A New Start". If you really want my thoughts on where Spinel's head was at, there's a bit in there that really explains it. In the fic, Steven decides to rejuvenate himself and brings Spinel along with him, and that's all the context you need for this.

I cannot explain that moment in the climax of the episode, though. Maybe she thought it would make him feel better, or that maybe he really did just need to open his eyes and see the error of his ways (which doesn't make sense, he KNOWS what he did). Maybe she thought that being silly would help somehow.

But you'd think she'd learn from her time with Pink as she grew more annoyed with her, but apparently not. Or maybe she would realize for a second that being loud and annoying was bad. Or maybe she doesn't learn.

Either way, it- and she- was dumb. And they did my baby dirty.

*drops mic and walks away*

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goth-albino-angel · 3 years

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Yugiri's smile is everything. She has so many of them and they all mean different things. When she's relaxed, when she's excited, when she's confused, when she has no clue what's going on but everyone else is happy so she's happy, when she's relieved, when she's proud... She has so many different smiles and if Tumblr didn't have the 10 image rules, I would absolutely gush about every single one of them in detail. Unfortunately, if I do that, all of those posts will probably be eaten out of the tag, so instead, here are my top 10 favorite Yugiri smiles so far, images included. (Pre-Revenge episode 9)

10. Season One, Episode 2: The First Smile/ 9. Season One, Episode 10: The Sentimental Smile

Episode 2 is the first time we ever see Yugiri smile. Before this, she seemed relatively nonplussed or generally disinterested in pretty much everything going on. Even though she was in a different time period with complete strangers and a madman demanding her to be something she has no knowledge of, she was fairly calm. Then the first time we see her smile, it's when she sees something completely familiar. Her own face. Not only that, but she directs that smile toward the character that is going to become basically her little sister. The first one means so much and it's so important.

Within the same vein, her smile to Kotaro in episode 10 is one during an emotionally heavy moment. It's the first time he's hit an actual snag in his plans. Sakura's singular focus on the Arpino show rather than on the bigger picture of the group as a whole would have been a massive roadblock had she not realized her mistake.

Yugiri is the only one who properly realizes the reason they were sent into the mountains in the first place. Instead of simply sitting on the information, she's proactive about it and actually goes to discuss the problem with Kotaro. She wants to understand his reasoning so that she might be able to help him. And when she turns toward him, she also gives him the observations she's witnessed throughout her new life. This smile may be low on my list of favorites, but it's still unbelievably important.

...Also, when they released the preview image of this smile, my brain short-circuited for ten minutes, so it had to make it onto the list regardless.

8. Season Two, Episode One: The Professional Smile

This smile isn't much out of the ordinary for what we've come to expect of Yugiri, but it's on here because this was our first look at Yugiri after basically two years of very little. None of us knew how the group would come back, how the writing team had incorporated the unexpected pandemic, how things would play out, or what would be happening. The Promo showed Tae's hand flying off to knock off Sakura's head, but as 2018 displayed, the promos can't always be trusted. This showed that, even in this new world where she's only been awake for a year, she's putting her skills to use and working just as hard as the others. Thanks to the conversation from Episode 10 of the first season, we know she was trained as a geisha which would make service work much easier than it would be for the other girls.

I don't have too much to say on this one, to be honest. I do like that she's in softer lighting, as opposed to the others who were all surrounded by harsh lighting on their season two introductions. The softer lighting lends itself well to the lack of pigment and coloration in the girls' makeup, allowing Yugiri to look like she has some color, even if she still looks somewhat pale and tired. It doesn't give her quite the same sickly look the others have at their jobs. The red dress? 100/10. Perfect decision.

7. Season One, Episode Five: The Proud Smile

SHE. DOES. GYMNASTICS. She has every right to this smile! I did the math for this specific part of the episode and Yugiri got third place. The judges liked her rope aerobics so much, they shot her all the way to third place even though her distance was zero meters. It wouldn't have gotten her interviewed, but it would have at least put Franchouchou at the forefront. I still applaud Tae snagging first place, but Yugiri deserves some praise. She really did go face first into the mud on a bike and said, "Never again." She's so proud of herself. I'll be gushing about the actual gymnastics part in a different post a little later, too, but she definitely deserves to be proud of herself. I'm really gay...

6. Season One, Episode Four: The Cute Smile

Originally, this was just going to be me doing some keysmash version of a squeal or something, but there's something I'd like to draw attention to. I'm pretty sure that, by this point, Franchouchou only knows two songs. Yomigaere, which was supposed to be performed in episode 2, and Mezame Returner, which is what's being performed here. Of these two, Yugiri has more experience with this one, but from what the audience had been shown, it wasn't good experience.

Memorizing the lyrics would have been the easy part for her. It's that a good portion of the dance practice was also spent helping Lily get the steps down and potentially calming her frustrations. Then the performance itself would have been a complete disaster if Junko and Ai hadn't gotten over themselves at the last minute to finally help.

This is the first successful performance of Mezame Returner we're witnessing and it's clear the group's had more practice since then. You can see how excited and happy Yugiri is here because this one is actually going well. They had a bit more time to prepare, the two lead roles were actually involved this time, and the audience also was clearly enjoying the performance. She's so happy and it's just so heart-warming to see. Yes, even with the CGI. Don't @ me, she looks adorable.

5. Season One, Episode Seven: The Sassy Smile

This one also was just going to be a squealing keysmash thing, but again, I have something to point out. Look how much more confident she is now that Junko and Ai have, once again, gotten over themselves. Yugiri sees the effect that Junko stepping in had on the others and just like the rest of the group, her movements are more relaxed and free.

It's more obvious, actually, if you look at the way the other girls are moving directly after Junko helps Ai up in comparison to how Yugiri is moving. She did a spin while waiting for Sakura and Lily to finish their segment, and she could be cheeky during her own. She sensed that the tension had mostly dissolved and because of that, she allowed herself to relax and could properly throw herself into the performance. When she throws out this smile and wink, it's not actually directed at the audience. It's Yugiri telling the others that they've got this without breaking the performance.

4. Season Two, Episode Four: The Gentle Smiles

I put both of these here because Yugiri's just... so... caring? So much of what she does is passive that you don't realize just how much work she puts into relieving the stress from the other girls until long after the problem has been resolved.

In the first, she's speaking to Sakura. No doubt, Yugiri probably noticed how worried Sakura was about Junko. Even though Sakura was trying not to let the others catch on just how anxious she really was, Yugiri still knew that something was bothering Sakura as well as Junko. Yugiri knew that the key to easing Junko's mind lay in placating Sakura first. She's seen what happens to them all when they fall apart and she wants to avoid that at all costs. So, Yugiri lifts Sakura's spirits and gives her back the fire and determination to make a great performance.

In the second, Yugiri is watching Junko eat. Unlike the others, it's clear Yugiri knows that Junko is in much higher spirits than when last they saw her. Junko would likely have still been a stuttering, quivering mess otherwise, but she wasn't stuttering and her actions were purposeful and self-assured. Yugiri is very observant. She would have caught on that something had happened to make Junko feel better. What makes this smile even better is that she's not the least bit disappointed. The reason she made dinner was to help Junko, but she doesn't view the meal as a waste of time. She's so focused on other people, that she's happy Junko is feeling better at all and even offers her different platters to help keep her mood up.

These are high on the list for two reasons. One, they're a show of just how much Yugiri does for her girls. Two, YUGIRI COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS HEADCANON CONFIRMED BITCHEEEESSS!!! I GOT ONE RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!!

3. Season Two, Episode Six: The Affectionate Smile

I will be completely honest, I have no idea why this one is as high as it is. I admit, I did spend three hours replaying this single thirty second scene because it's really sweet and Yugiri and Tae don't interact very often, so seeing Yugiri not only be worried for Tae, but also be immediately reassured that Tae would be fine was just something my heart didn't know it needed until it had it. The sheer level of affection Yugiri shows toward Tae is too adorable. Especially since Yugiri usually only has moments like those with Sakura and, to a lesser extent, Lily. This smile's really cute, it's in the middle of a wholesome scene, and it made me love both Yugiri and Tae that much more.

2. Season One, Episode Three: The Excited Smile

Once again, an entry that was going to be a simple squealing keysmash until I realized there was something to point out here as well. This is the first smile we ever see from Yugiri that's genuinely enthusiastic. She has plenty of them, especially during her performances, but this is our first time seeing her fully incorporate herself into the group as an actual member and actually look excited to do something with the others. This was an omen of adorable things to come and damn did it deliver.

Honorable Mentions.

I'm only going to touch on each of these briefly because to be honest, there are a LOT of smiles I could've picked.

The first one is from episode 6 when the group is talking about their very first meet-and-greet. Lily asks Yugiri if she's keeping up okay, and Yugiri remarks that she's taking things as they come. This was a small look into the kind of character she is. As I mentioned before, she's very passive in the way she operates, but that's to the benefit of those she cares for. This is her admitting that she doesn't want to be a problem and it's just sweet that even though Lily is worried about her, Yugiri's still highkey thinking about everyone else.

To the right is a shot of Yugiri during Electric Returner. This one is just the squealing keysmash because she looks so genuinely ecstatic, it's contagious. She's NO DAMN CLUE what happened or why they sound so different, but she is absolutely living her best second life.

The next shot comes from the beginning of Yomigaere and is somewhat of a repeat of the above. She's excited to perform for such a big crowd, she's glad Sakura finally agreed to actually participate, and she's living her best second life. Whoever animates Yugiri's CG model? I love you. I want to send you a gift basket. She's always so happy during performances.

Then comes her smile after the group finds out Sakura's memories are back. She's just glad Sakura, her Sakura, has come back to them, that she accepts her crap luck and is still willing to stay. For Yugiri, this goes under the list of Best Possible Outcomes. Her family is whole again and she's so relieved.

Last in the top row is the first full frontal shot we get of Yugiri in the Saga Jihen music video. She's so unbelievably adorable here. I wish I could've gotten her first expression, but the curtain was still rising and without photoshop, I'm not editing an image to the degree needed to get her whole face lightened. Point is, she's cute and everyone deserves to see her adorable face on the first song she got to be center for.

First on the bottom row is Yugiri looking apologetic from episode 8 of Revenge. She's so cute. It was an honest mistake and she had no way of knowing the paper belonged to Kiichi. No doubt, that was probably why she offered to help him rewrite them later.

Next is how cute she looks in big sister mode. She's wiping the mud from Kiichi's cheeks and is taking such care with him. Throughout the entire episode, she treats him like a little kid and it's likely because her role was big sister for so long that she doesn't know how not to treat him that way. It really does shed light on just how kind she is to everyone, though, that she doesn't even think about her dirty kimono and focuses on cleaning him up a little first.

Then we have her smiling at Kiichi as she remarks on how beautiful his dream of reviving Saga is. She even says she hopes it comes true. His dream means something to her. She can't even fully see it, he can't even fully see it, but they don't need to. What Itou didn't understand this whole time is something Yugiri understood immediately just from listening to Kiichi talk. They don't need to see it in their minds, all they need is to feel it in their hearts, and that's something Yugiri knows.

And lastly on the honorable mentions, because this post is already super long, Yugiri smiling while she's cooking for her guests. It was a tossup between this or the pinwheel because it's just really nice that Yugiri can simply enjoy mundane things. I chose this one because it's a direct contrast to how she was at the beginning. Before, she ate with a disinterested expression, but now, she's cooking for guests rather than just for herself. The lift in her mood is obvious, and it's something so small but so heartwarming, I couldn't resist.

I would've put the pinwheel moment anyway, but unfortunately, as a com major, formatting and design are everything and an extra picture on the top or bottom without a balancer would've thrown the whole thing off. Maybe next time.

NOW FOR NUMBER ONE

1. Season Two, Episode Eight: The Softest Smile

This should have been expected. There's something genuinely touching about the fact that Yugiri really does give her everything, even to complete strangers. These girls barely know her, everyone in town barely knows her, but because her dance students suggested Yugiri go out and actually experience, Yugiri gives it actual thought. She doesn't dismiss them, she doesn't deride them, she doesn't make them feel foolish or anything like that. She treats their suggestion the same way she would if it had come from a close friend. And she does actually take them up on it.

Later, we see her come into contact with Kiichi to demonstrate that even full-on strangers aren't exempt from her kind heart, but this means more. All we know is that these girls take Yugiri's dance class, and from the way they speak when we first meet them, it's clear Yugiri has a professional wall between herself and those she instructs. But she still treats them as she would the girls back in Shimabara. It's proof that, even in the past, Yugiri really was just as kind-hearted as in the present. It's a show don't tell kind of thing that just speaks so deeply to the writer in me. I love this smile. It's everything. Her smiles are everything. She's everything.

#Yugiri #Yuugiri #Zombieland Saga #Zombie Land Saga #Zombieland Saga Revenge #Zombie Land Saga Revenge #Angel has spoken #rip mobile users #I'm sorry but I needed to do this #also sorry about the slight passive aggressiveness for entries five and six #I'll do better

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szecretary · 2 years

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thoughts on voltron: legendary defender, season one, first five episodes. this will be like witnessing your mom watch a show for the youngins and being confused the entire time.

warning for spoilers, obviously, but idk what for because i’m later to this show than the alteans were to the war.

i almost closed netflix bc i saw that the first episode is one hour long wh-

this is how shiro is introduced? harsh. but i like that in the first few minutes, the galra are already established as a force to be reckoned with.

first scene with lance, hunk and pidge, already showing their dynamic and their current situation! also, lol, lance getting told "you're only here because the best pilot in your class had a discipline issue" way to create tension between characters, keith isn't even there and we already know lance kind of hates him.

i like hunk he reminds me of po from kung fu panda hehe

what's pidge's thing with the kerberos mission? he seems very very invested in it, even for a character that science oriented.

OH IT'S KEITH. man i'm actually really impressed with the character introductions in this first episode, they're so clever and very effective, they show the most important facts about the person without slowing down.

keith really lived alone in that desert cabin for however long huh

where's the cat going

oh the cat went home, neat.

i love how at this point it seems that only blue chose its paladin, for the rest of them allura did a personality assessment off first impressions and assigned the rest of the lions, she really said "the bond cannont be forced... by anyone except for me" ma'am these are 5 random people from earth.

apart from that, i'm loving how intuitive piloting is with the lions!

lol lance fully killed some people there

listen if pidge doesn't turn out to be related to the people in the kerberos mission... just :( the way he reacted to shiro quoting the commander? there's no way he doesn't know them.

"go. be great." SHUT UP 😭

blue woke up yesterday and she's already getting beat up give it a rest it's been 10.000 years.

FUCK OFF SENDAK. I know of you, you lame ass excuse for an antagonist.

shiro i love you that's all i have to say.

THE COMMANDER IS PIDGE'S FATHER I KNEW IT HHHHH

the mice are so cute i can't believe allura is a fairytale princess with animal sidekicks.

YEAH GIANT HERO ROBOT!

ok second episode let's go:

this druid lady has a very cool character design, not sure what's her point in the story tho

pidge when are you gonna tell us your secret?

third episode!

it's really not fair how cool shiro is, paladin of the black lion, and "the champion"

oh no, shiro was forced to fight for galra entertainment? mmmmm yeah why not i love pain and suffering.

the little people who live on arus are very cute.

i'm sure shiro only attacked pidge's brother to keep him from fighting the gladiator don't be mad pidge :(

oh so the thing was the same gladiator, makes sense.

OH PIDGE'S NAME IS KATIE she's matt's sister this makes so much sense, i'm very sad, i can't wait to know her story.

ok episode four, the iconic failed team cheer i used to see on twitter.

the way lance pronounced varadero beach made me want to cry but at least it's the first mention of anything related to cuba, so i'll take it.

why'd they already beat up lance gdi give the boy a break.

episode five, i'm stressed.

NOT THE FLASHBACKS I CAN'T KEEP IT TOGETHER :(

kerberos mission: takashi shirogane, and samuel and matthew holt :(

pidge you are such a badass you have my heart too, also it's so sweet how rover has like a little personality.

"hasta la later, keith" MAKE IT STOP

(but ok that does sound like something i would say to be annoying)

hunk and bolin from legend of korra would be such good bros you can't change my mind.

ok the galra are the bad guys but they have style, "nothing stops me but triumph, and death" that's cool.

THAT FLYING ROBOT BETTER COME BACK OR ELSE.

damn even the mice have a kill count everyone has a kill count.

love lance waking up only to shoot a bad guy and then dramatically faint again, maybe he has hispanic heritage after all, he has the flare.

"we are a good team" hell yeah you are buddy.

final thought on the first five episodes: honestly? i’m impressed, the pacing is great, the characters are well defined and they all get their little moments to shine. loved the pidge focus on episode five, and i’m very excited too see what happens next. that’ll have to wait because i haven’t slept and now my brain is repeating that voltron forming sequence they play EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

rest of season one liveblog.

#kari's summer watchlist #voltron legendary defender #voltron liveblog #vld #sze.log

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charmspoint · 3 years

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Mars Red: Anime vs Manga pt 2

So here's part 2 of my anime vs manga comparison of some scenes that happened in Yoshiwara arc. Again, to be fair I will do my best not to compare any content that is in one iteration and not the other cuz they are both based off the stage play which i have no knowledge off. This will be purely based on scenes they do share aside from one bit which i find is important. I'm mostly comparing how effectively both iterations did what they had to do and tl;dr I'm siding with manga as a much better atmosphere, character, design, impact vise you name it.

The first part of this discussion was about the scene between Suwa and Akesato. While I felt this scene lost a lot of atmosphere and character, it was still mostly functional for what it needed to do, a solid D to a light C if you will.

This next scene is a straight up F

The rest will be under the cut for length reasons.

2. Kurusu vs vampire mob

So like I knew this scene was in trouble as soon as the episode started. Why? Wrong set up.

In the opening scene of the anime we see Maeda and Kurusu training and Kurusu hesitates to go all out on Maeda cuz he's human and Maeda says this to him.

The words Kurusu later remembers when he's hesitant to attack the vampires that are attacking Yamagami. These two scenes just don't link the best because well, in one scene he is hesitating because he doesn't want to hurt a human, in the other he's hesitating because he wants to talk the vampires down instead of attacking. It's two different scenarios okay. In manga this is handled completely differently. You know how in the anime we see Suwa jump out of the window to give chase and then we cut to them in the hq talking about how the vampire escaped? Well that's a scene we actually get to see in the manga and the reason the vampire escaped was because Kurusu took pity on her. This gets him scolded by both Suwa (another missing Suwa vs Kurusu ideals conflict) and Maeda with those words.

Now I don't know about you but a scene where Kurusu is told him letting a vampire go because he felt bad for them might get his friends killed is a much better set up for a scene in which his friend almost gets killed cuz Kurusu was trying to reason with the vampires then him hesitating over seriously fighting a human. Hmmmm I wonder why that is? Kurusu is a very typical shonen boy in his ideals. He is newly turned vamp and one of A rank at that. He is still getting used to his powers and urges and he feels the need to cling to his humanity and to give his enemies the same benefit, often trying to talk them down instead of killing them. This makes Suwa such a wonderful contrast to him as someone who has abandoned their humanity and is very gung ho about killing as many vampires as he can. Their conflict is wonderful and I can't wait to see where it goes. Kurusu is very much learning about how he can't just sit on his pedestal and preach about peaceful resolutions because his enemy very much isn't rational and will kill him and his friends if given a chance. It's sad, but as the strongest vampire on the team Kurusu very much has an obligation to dirty his hands whether he likes it or not. He is immediately punished for letting vampires go as they go on and kill more people, as they use his hesitance and his attempts to start a conversation to hurt his friends and allies.

And his friends do get hurt. A lot. You might not think that if you just watched the anime where Yamagami just gets gently suckled on with like 0 blood or gore.

Because uh during this scene in the manga...

I legit thought Yamagami was going to die here. Like before this they even discuss how one of the only ways to kill a vampire is to cut off its head and...I don't usually feel like characters are going to die in the manga if that makes sense, I believe in their plot armor and the vampires are already p hard to kill but here...it really fucking got me and the only reason he didn't die was cuz his head wasn't completely cut off like...damn that was close. The manga does have a lot more blood and horror then the anime which makes it a lot more impactful when it comes to stuff like this, when it actually has to convince you the characters are in danger. When you look at Yamagami's state in the manga you fear for his life, when you look at it in the anime you go 'uhoh that looks sorta bad'. But there's no real sense of urgency, of panic, of thinking you'll lose this character. Kurusu also shows way more emotion at the state Yamagami is in which sells the urgency of the situation and he also spends more then one line trying to convince the vampires to listen to him.

This not only shows off his bond with Yamagami but also how strongly he clings to his ideals even in such an emergency situation, trying to talk the vampires down to the very end. This makes it so much more impactful when the blade strikes Yamagami's neck and makes us believe he died. Kurusu is the strongest vampire there, he is easily able to deal with the situation but he wastes his time with words and almost sacrifices his friends life for it. The message is very clear and impactful, this sort of pity and hesitance will be punished and will be punished brutally. In the anime he basically goes 'hey stop...oh you wont? guess ill attack there'. A lot less horror, a lot less urgency, it really feels like they watered down such an important scene as much as possible.

And that isn't even the biggest offender. The biggest offender is Kurusu's feral state.

Tell me if you can spot the difference between these pictures.

Hmmm its kinda hard to tell but it seems hmmm that the manga is once again a teeny tiny more ? Intense? Like jesus christ the fight scene in the anime is done in like 20 seconds and can barely classify as a fight scene since Kursus just kinda slides his way through a scren of unmoving opponents. In the manga we get this complete carnage. This isn't just Kurusu either, while in the anime feral vampires look like slightly more ominous normal people, all feral vampires in the manga look like Kurusu here, a complete senseless monsters, which makes Kurusu's attempts to talk them down seem even more naïve then they already are. Feral vampires are terrifying things that think of nothing but destruction. In this scene the other members of the unit (aside from Suwa who shows no fear but also does nothing to stop him and instead joins in like the eager murder maniac he is) don't even wanna approach Kurusu or try to stop him while he's in this state. Because right then he isn't Kurusu, he's a feral A rank who could easily kill them if they got in his way. This scene really displays the horror of the feral state. The danger Kurusu could present if he turned feral again, the danger Suwa could present if he took off his mask, the utter mindless monstrosity of it. It's horrifying and it's impactful and it makes you remember this state and the consequences of it. It's almost funny to compare this scene to the one in the anime, especially the moment in the anime where Kurusu stops and is like 'did i do all this?' when he looks completely calm, collected and in control during the whole thing

With this 'same' scene from the manga

In the anime he barely looks fazed by what he did, he looks a bit surprised and then he goes on business as usual. In the manga he has legit lost all thought and control to his feral instincts, he has turned into a bloodthirsty animal and now he is horrified by that. I ran out of picture space but after this he starts crying. In the anime he just seems to kinda brush it off, it doesn't impact him. But in the manga this signals the first time he went against his ideals and fully lost control of himself. Through the whole story Kurusu has been holding on to his humanity as much as possible and now he had lost his grip on it in such a violent way. Yes it saved his friend but at the cost of something very significant and personal. His ability to view himself as a human.

Honestly the anime simply can't compare.

#mars red #Kurusu Shutaro #Lucy rants

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spencers-dria · 3 years

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Turn for the Better

Someone To Stay Ch. 1

Spencer x fem!reader

Spencer POV:

I open my eyes and glance around the room. It's darker than I remember. I must have fallen asleep reading on the couch again. I glance down and see a pile of books on the rug. Oh yeah...I only made it through about four books this time before I nodded off. I sigh in frustration that I'm awake. Might as well get up I suppose.

I wander into the kitchen and pull open the fridge only to be met with a jar of peanut butter, week old left overs, and a half empty jug of juice. Next.

I try again with the pantry. Almost completely bare. I guess this is what happens when you stop going to the grocery store. I settle on a cup of apple juice and a bag of chips... better than nothing right?

I slump back down onto the couch and pull my green wool blanket over me. As I stare up at my ceiling, as I begin to let my mind wander. But this was dangerous territory. I have to keep my mind occupied, I just have to. So I quickly sit back up and turn the TV to one of my favorite Dr. Who episodes. They say that anxious people re-watch the same shows because they find the familiarity comforting. I could definitely understand the feeling.

It was the weekend, which meant I wasn't called into work. Cases had been slow lately, as we spent quite a bit of time doing paperwork back at the office. Unfortunately for me, this meant less distractions. Distractions were good. Distractions were necessary. They are the only way I make it through the days anymore.

Things had finally returned to normal for me back at work. I was going into the field, and it felt like my coworkers were no longer tiptoeing around me. I hate when they do that, and it bothers me more than any amount of teasing ever could. I'm not so delicate, so easily breakable. Look at everything I have been through, everything I have endured. Yet here I am, still alive, still doing my job. I didn't need to be babied. So it was a relief when I felt the regular rapport I shared with my friends return. They had gone back to the sarcastic remarks and silly nicknames. I was grateful for it. They did, however, continue to check up on me. This was something that I did appreciate. They've seen me go down a dark road once before. I have no intentions of ever returning. I was stronger than that... I think. All I know is I have held on this long without resorting to any unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Coping mechanisms...oh how I wish I had something to make the healing process easier. Having a fairly empty social calendar left me alone often. Normally I would find comfort in the peace and quiet of my solitary apartment, but not quite so much lately. I couldn't very well make plans to go out, and I wouldn't even know how to begin to do that. Who would want to hang out with me right now anyways? I'd be a damper on the fun, and everyone knows it. That's probably why my friends stopped inviting me to the nights at the bar.

There I go again, letting my mind slip into a dark hole of anxiety. Its not a safe place to be. I quickly turn my attention back to the show in front of me, letting it drown out all other thoughts.

The ring of my phone quickly draws my attention away. Finally...another case! I jump up to answer, seeing the name on my screen: Derek Morgan. That's odd. Usually Hotch or Garcia call to notify us of a new case.

"Hello?" I answer, confusion lacing my voice.

"Pretty Boy! Buzz me up!"

Well now I'm even more confused. Derek never comes to my apartment. I quickly press the button letting him into the building and opening my apartment door, waiting for him to arrive.

As he comes up the stairs, he gives me a grin shouting, "Come on man! Get dressed. We're goin' out!"

I roll my eyes and retreat back into the apartment, Derek close behind me.

I sink back onto the couch, my eyes glued to the television as I tune him out.

"Aw c'mon. Don't be like that. How long have you been sitting there watching TV? Have you done anything else today, at all?"

I don't answer, I don't even look at him.

"Oh, let me guess. You've been reading all day, huh?"

"Wow, can't get anything past you huh?" I say dryly, regretting my tone as soon as the words left my mouth.

"Alright that it. You've been cooped up in here too long. Like I said before, we're going out. And I'm not taking no for an answer" he says sternly, raising an eyebrow at me.

I finally look up at him as I roll my eyes.

"You know I can kick your ass right?" Derek smirks.

"Fine" I concede. "Well...where are we going? I don't know what to wear unless you tell me what our plans are."

"Don't pretend you don't wear the same fancy button ups no matter where you end up going."

I let out a small laugh...he's got me there.

"Dinner at Rossi's. I know pretty boys are high maintenance but, hurry up or you'll make us late!" I smile at the nickname. Same old Derek.

Y/N POV:

You let out a sigh of relief as you watched your coworker approach you, ready to receive report. It had been a particularly busy shift, and you were ready to get some much-needed rest. You walked to each patient room, giving Clementine summary of the day and the latest updates on labs and vital signs. You stepped into each room with her, checking one last time to make sure each of your patients was doing well and didn't need anything else before you left. Normally you and Clem would spend some time catching up and making jokes, but she could tell you were tired and needed to be home more than anything. You wished her good luck on her shift as you made your way to the break room. After putting away your stethoscope and the large collection of pens, pencils, and markers you kept in your pockets, you finally headed towards the elevator to leave for the day.

You opened the door to your apartment to be greeted by your dog, Juneau. She was a rescue you adopted a few months back. She still needed to make progress, but she had really warmed up to you and your friends and seemed much more comfortable in her new home. After feeding her dinner and taking her for a short walk, you heated up a quick frozen dinner and sunk into your couch. Curling up in your blanket, you spent a few minutes browsing through different streaming services only to land on The Office, as usual. Your mind drifts to what your next few days might consist off. You just so happened to land 4 days off in a row, but you had no idea how you would spend your time. You glanced down at your phone as it lit up. It was your Uncle Will.

"Hey, whats up!" you chimed, glad to hear from your favorite uncle.

"Hey, (Y/N). I'm actually calling to invite you to a dinner some friends of mine are having tomorrow night. I know your schedule is real busy. But I haven't seen you much since you moved up here to Virginia! I know you haven't met many people here yet, but I think I can help you make a start. "

The kind gesture made you smile. You had always been fairly close with your father's side of the family. He had grown up in Louisiana and met your mother at a college in Texas. You spent your childhood in Houston but frequently visited the Cajun half of your family. Uncle Will had moved away once he fell in love with Jenifer Jareau, his now wife, and you hadn't seem much of him the past few years. But as luck would have it, your nursing career had lead you to a hospital in Fredericksburg, VA. You felt extremely lucky to have family nearby, or else you would have been completely alone. But sometimes you still felt that way, which is why you were so grateful for his offer.

"That actually sounds great! I am off for the next four days, and I didn't really have anything planned. Who will I be meeting at this dinner?"

"Well it's some of JJ's coworkers. They're like a second family to us, and I know they'll be just as welcoming to you. I already told them you moved up here, and they've been begging to meet you."

"Aww I can't wait to see Aunt JJ and my sweet little cousin, Henry! Its been so long since I came to visit you guys. I think Henry was barely two years old the last time I saw him."

"Well we all hope to see you a lot more now that you're here. You're like a daughter to us, Y/N. You are welcome to visit any time you like. I know nursing is a stressful job, and it can take a toll. Its important to have family and friends around you when things get tough." You could hear that this was a genuine offer and you fully planned to take him up on it in the future. Being alone in a new state was taking its toll.

"So where and when should I plan to meet for dinner?"

"I'll text you the address real quick. Everyone is planning to meet around 6. It shouldn't be too far of a drive. It's one of JJ's coworker's houses. David Rossi. He's a real easygoing guy, and he loves cooking for everyone. He loves meeting new people even more, so you should feel right at home!"

"Sounds like a fun time. Thank you again for thinking to invite me. I'm really looking forward to it!"

"Alright boo, talk to you later."

You smiled at the pet name used by the entire Louisiana side of your family. I guess the north had yet to steal his southern roots. You hung up the phone. You finally had plans. It would be nice to talk to someone who wasn't a coworker. It would also be your first excuse to dress up since moving and starting your new job. Too excited to wait, you jumped up from the couch and began to rifle through your closet for something to wear. You didn't want to be too over or underdressed. You grabbed a black spaghetti strap fit and flare dress and throw it on with some black panty hose, a lightweight maroon cardigan, and some black heels. You snapped a quick photo in the mirror and shoot a text to Aunt JJ.

Y/N: Apparently I'm joining y'all for dinner tomorrow night...is this too much???

Aunt JJ: I heard! I can't wait!

And oh my goodness, no! You look gorgeous! It will be perfect.

Also...Henry is so excited to see you!

You smiled, more confident in your choice. Aunt JJ had great taste. You had only had the chance to meet her in person a couple times, but the two of you had clicked right away and stayed in touch over text and Facetime. Sometimes she felt more like the sister you never had.

Starting to feel the effects of your particularly difficult shift, you start to get ready for bed. You wanted to be well rested for tomorrow. You say goodnight to Juneau and crawl into bed, snuggled under all the blankets. You fall asleep with a smile on your face, with the feeling that things in your life are about to take a turn for the better. You couldn't explain it...but somehow you just knew.

#fanfic #writing #criminal minds #spencer x reader #spencerreid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x y/n #romance #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #original work #original story #Spotify

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coureirsix · 3 years

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supernatural season 16 episode 4 - “lifeline” | ao3 link

it's roughly 11 PM on january 23rd when dean gets a call from eileen. he'd been out of the bunker with jack and cas for nearly three days; they'd taken jack to an amusement park. something about never seeing one before which reminded dean the last time he'd ever been to one, he was three years old and didn't remember a thing. which was fine, except that jack had wanted to go to six flags. he'd said something about finding old commercials with a dancing old man and the closest one was in kentucky. naturally, this wasn't an issue with dean. he'd driven farther for less, but on the way back he'd begun to realize that as he got older, the drives took more out of him.

they'd gotten back earlier that afternoon and had spent most of the day lounging around until the exhaustion got the better of them at around nine. well, except jack. who could have just driven back to kentucky if he wanted to. cas made sure he didn't want to. so, it's saturday night, cas is breathing deeply beside him, completely asleep, jack is probably watching TV in the dean-cave, and dean has been drifting in and out of sleep for the past 20 minutes when his phone buzzes to the tune of the Call Me Maybe song. it's the tone he'd set up for eileen because, well, she never calls. so, when she does call, it's usually an emergency flare that's followed up with an explanatory text.

dean's eyes shoot awake and he watches the call miss as he waits a second for eileen's message to come in.

dean, sam broke the tub. he can't get the hot water to stop running. SOS. please, my hair is disgustingly humid. his too.

and dean laughs. it was an emergency, but the kind that didn't have him spiraling into a depression. that was... almost nice, he thinks. they have normal people problems now. he leans over to where cas is asleep beside him and cas' trained as well as dean is. he stirs awake with the movement and opens his eyes in a half-awake gesture.

“sam’s in trouble,” dean says with a smile. cas’ eyes shoot open, but dean’s demeanour doesn’t change, instead he follows up with, “he.. broke his bathtub somehow.”

cas squints. dean laughs some more and gets himself out of bed. he’s gotta find the little duffel bag that they’d dedicated to tools that didn’t include weapons of mass destruction. it shouldn’t be too hard to find. the last time they’d used it was when sam actually broke a door off its hinges.

“i’m going back to sleep,” cas says, turning over as dean redresses. and dean laughs again. cas was grumpy when he was exhausted. it was endearing.

it doesn’t take him too long to get ready to leave the bunker. he finds the duffel bag underneath the bathroom sink and before he knows it, he’s pulling out of the bunker’s vicinity in the impala and headed toward sam and eileen’s place. the issue with them is they live roughly 45 minutes away. he texts eileen back, letting her know he’s on his way.

and dean thinks, as he drives over. that it’s his birthday tomorrow. well- he checks his phone, it’s basically his birthday. sunday january 24th, 2021. he didn’t think he’d live this long. he was the answer to the universe now, technically. 42. he looks down at his hands on the wheel. they’re worn. they’re the hands of a tired man who fought multiple apocalypses, multiple archangels, god himself. and won.

he takes a deep breath and thinks about sam. he loves his little brother more than he can ever explain. it’s unhealthy, probably, how much he’d done to save sam from everything. death, despair, sam himself that time he lost his soul. dean was there and willing to bleed for whatever sam needed. and he knew sam would always do the same. it was comforting. and even moreso now that they’d decided to take some time to really asses what was best for either of them. sam let himself want his apple pie life again. and it was the happiest day of dean’s life to see his little brother decorating the house he’d leased with eileen.

dean doesn’t hunt fulltime anymore. he’ll do an odd ghost job here and there, but mostly he mans the phones. he’s now FBI Supervisor Agent Harkness, police chief Richard Grayson, at cas’ request Texas Ranger Dean Swift, and at jack’s request Marlo Bridgers.it’s a living, he thinks. he still helps out other hunters and he passes off the bigger jobs to the younger people that’ve unfortunately ended up in the hunting life.

mostly, though, he and cas have been making up for lost time. they go out on dates. dates, like embarrassing 15 year olds. he’s taken cas to the movies, they’ve gone for walks at the mall. dean held cas’ hand under a tree and it was the most incredible thing in the world.

it’s embarrassing, it’s enough to make himself blush at the memory of it, but it’s also nice in that same breath. it brings him a sense of peace like he’s never fully properly known. because it’s about trust. and not trust in cas, not trust in himself, hell, the trust has nothing to do with either of them. it has to do with the fact that dean has finally let himself trust that things are going to be okay. that no matter what happens, he’s going to be okay.

and that’s what he thinks about when he’s sitting across from cas at the baskin robbins. that they’re safe. that things are okay. because they are, dean’s earned that much through his own tears and blood.

the sound of wind hitting the impala as he drives down the highway closer to sam and eileen is the melody to the memories of his life as it has been since they got rid of chuck and jack put god’s power back into the universe.

he pulls into the driveway of sam’s cookie cutter house. he’s in the middle of the driveway but dean doesn’t care and he knows neither sam nor eileen would care either. besides, the impala outshines the two normal cars they drive. he grabs the duffel bag and heads for the door, waiting for a second before the door clicks and he sees eileen in a crack in the door. he smiles at her.

“dean!” she says, visibly excited. dean keeps his smile on his face and waves, unsure why she’d be so excited that he’s here at practically midnight to fix her bathtub. she reaches out to grab his wrist and pull him into the house. she leads him through dark down the little hall that dean knows leads into the bathroom. dean notices there is no humidity in the house.

“eileen? is everything-” dean starts to ask when the lights flick on, blinding dean for a second before it clicks that it’s a party. it’s a party at midnight for him.

he sees jody, donna, alex, claire and kaia. sam and bobby among several other hunters dean had come to know. it’s a full house, yet dean notices the lack of jack and cas. there’s a stack of presents in a corner behind the kitchen, a cake with a single candle on the table. claire is approaching him with a party hat in her hands and an evil look on her face. dean glances over at eileen, who’s beaming at him. she knows what she did. led zeppelin comes through a little speaker in the corner, not too loud, but loud enough that its ambiance music now.

dean lets himself get wrapped in a hug from claire and then lets her put the hat on him before sam approaches him.

“this your idea?” dean asks. sam grins, but shakes his head.

“no, actually. i wanted to do it tomorrow morning. show up at the bunker with everyone, but, i know someone with worse intentions than me who said that tricking you into coming here at the moment of your birthday would be something you couldn’t see coming,” sam opens his arms and dean lets himself fall in. he hugs his little brother back and the emotions from earlier come back. he and sam were alive. dean’s greatest achievement in life was keeping sam alive and now here he was, reaping the benefits.

he goes through similar motions with everyone. jody gives him a hug and then leans up to kiss him on the temple. donna squeezes him so hard he swears his insides are flattened.

after a few moments of getting caught up with everyone, sam sits him down at the table where the cake is. dean rubs his hands, ready to light the candle in it when sam makes this “uh-uh” sound. dean looks up at him in confusion when eileen brings over a pie with those large novelty number candles set into it. 42 sure was a year.

dean sits there in the obligatory hot seat as everyone gathers around and sings him happy birthday. it’s awkward, it makes him blush and tears well up in his eyes, although nobody can really see it through the dimmed lights. and he looks around and his smile saddens a bit. he should have told cas to come with him. did sam not think to text jack?

he goes through the motions and cuts the first slice of the pie for himself and passes off the pastry to sam and eileen who take care of passing out the rest of it and the cake that’d been there. dean looks around, hoping cas and jack had been right behind him as sam brings him over a whiskey. it goes down ridiculously smooth. sam mentions he ran one last credit card scam for $3,000 whiskey for this. dean laughs and asks for another.

the night winds down fairly quickly, given it’s nearly three in the morning by the time everyone’s settled down into a less partying mood. dean ends up sitting outside with sam in some lawn chairs from walmart in sam’s cookie cutter back yard. eileen’s gone to bed and most everyone has gone home by then.

“you ever think we’d live this long?” sam asks.

“nope,” dean says without hesitation, “sammy, you died when you were twenty two. i died at twenty seven? twenty eight? god, i don’t even remember.”

“and those were just the first times,” sam says with an incredulous laugh.

“shit,” dean laughs with him, “yeah.”

“and we got out,” sam says. there’s a satisfaction in his voice that makes every single time dean died or did anything stupid for sam worth it. it’s a tone that dean knows means sam is happy. and that’s it, that was dean’s goal.

“we did,” dean agrees, taking another sip of the whiskey, “we beat hell, we beat heaven, we beat purgatory, we beat god.”

“kicked god’s ass,” sam affirms, “we get to choose what we want to do now. we write our own destiny now.”

dean reaches over and outstretches his glass. sam meets him halfway and they toast to that. dean watches sam pull his phone out and send off a quick text message. probably eileen telling him to go to bed.

they sit in silence for a while. and sam’s phone vibrates. dean watches him check it and not respond. trouble in paradise? he doubts it, but he doesn’t really know every single thing about sam anymore.

“i know you’re gonna tell me to shut up, but i do have to say, dean. thank you,” sam looks over at him.

“for?” dean asks.

“for everything, man,” sam has this look on his face like he’s going to cry, “you raised me. you were always there for me. im thirty eight, nearly sixteen years overdue if you hadn’t sold your soul to save me. i’m who i am because of you, and i like to think i’m in pretty good shape. and you, dean. i’m so proud of you. you’re the strongest person i’ve ever met. and i love you, and i’m happy that it was you that i got to have be my big brother.”

dean actually cries, but he turns around so that sam can’t see it. he composes himself in a second and turns back. he doesn’t have it in him to fight sam on the emotional distress this is causing him. instead he says, “thanks, sam. i’m glad i got to be your big brother, too.”

sam’s phone buzzes again. he checks it again and this time does respond. he sighs and looks over at dean again, “i gotta go. eileen says the bed is too cold.”

dean huffs a laugh and nods, “go fix that.”

sam nods and gets up. dean hears the door that leads back into the house slide open and then slide shut. and dean is left with himself at the end of it all. he sighs. he’s happy, he thinks.

and then he hears an unmistakable flutter.

“dean!” he hears jack yell. it’s louder given it’s three in the morning and most people in this neighbourhood are asleep.

“i’m so sorry,” jack says, rushing up to dean’s side, “we were planning to be there for the cake but it wasn’t ready and we kept trying to fix things-”

“fix what?” dean asks, curiously. he’s not mad.

“the-” jack stops short, looking behind dean. and dean realizes the missing piece of his birthday puzzle has to be behind him.

and he is. the angel castiel is standing behind dean on the cement part of the patio a few feet back, wearing one of dean’s old band tshirts under his trench coat. and there’s a book in his hands.

“happy birthday, dean,” cas says, a little smile on his face.

dean gets up. his foot nearly kicks the whiskey glass he set down with the speed he gets up at. and he doesn’t waste any time in grabbing the sides of cas’ face and pressing the most heartfelt, loving, tender kiss dean has ever given anyone in his life. there’s a warmth that always seems to be radiating from cas and dean wants to stick to it like a leech.

when he pulls back, cas keeps the little smile on his face and hands dean the book. it’s a photo album, he realizes, once he takes it and opens it. there’s- there’s baby pictures of him there. things that were surely lost in the fire in lawrence. as he flips through the album, he finds pictures of him and sam growing up. things nobody had ever photographed before, he’s pretty sure. at one point he finds a picture of him at age twelve, lying on roof of the impala.

“cas,” dean asks, in completely disbelief, “where did you get these?”

“i did!” jack says coming from behind dean in an awkward hug from behind, “i can still tap into the power of god if i want to. it wasn’t hard to pop into different points of your life and just take a picture.”

dean turns back and pulls jack forward to pull him into a better hug as he laughs. that’s somehow the craziest thing he’s ever heard.

“happy birthday, dad,” jack says. and he tenses against dean.

“did you just call me dad?” dean asks.

“no,” jack lies.

“right,” dean says, a grin on his face that he looks up and notices that cas shares.

“well, it’s kinda creepy that you existed for a second at different points in my life, but i love it, jack. a walk down memory lane, shit and all. i love it, thank you, son” and he leans down to press a kiss against the top of jack’s head.

“this what kept you?” dean asks cas as jack lets go and says he’s heading inside.

cas nods and he says with a little shrug, “it seemed like a kind gesture. i sort of gave him points to land on. that way he didn’t land in the middle of a hunt or something. i’m sorry, dean.”

dean shakes his head and goes to set the book down on the chair he’d been sitting in and he walks back over to cas. where cas is standing, there’s a cement step between the cement patio area and the grass that dean and sam had been sitting in. it makes it so cas is a few inches taller than dean.

dean finds himself turning around so that cas can come around him, head coming to rest on dean’s shoulder and his arms coming around dean’s middle.

“thought you were supposed to be sleeping,” dean says with a mocking tone.

“and miss your forty-second birthday?” cas asks, turning to press a kiss to the side of dean’s face. they look up at the sky and dean wonders how exactly he got there. there’s a feeling in his chest that he doesn’t understand, but he knows what it is. it’s peace, it’s happiness.

“i have a speech prepared for you,” cas says softly. his hands tap at dean’s stomach and dean brings up his own hands to cover them.

“right, right. something about how my eyes glitter like the moon?” dean asks, his tone is still jokey.

“something like that,” cas says, “and moreso how you’ve been the world’s lifeline and how i’m so happy you’re finally thinking of yourself.”

dean’s heart sinks a little as cas continues.

“you know sam loves you, you know your friends love you. you know that i love you with the wrath of heaven behind me. and somehow that doesn’t compare to the happiness i feel now that i know that you finally love you.”

dean’s face goes completely red. the warmth is different from the warmth of the next kiss that cas places against his cheek again.

“thank you,” he chokes out, voice breaking because he’s started crying again, “i... i don’t have heaven. but i love you with the power of a guy who fought god.”

cas laughs, “and won,” he adds.

dean’s blush comes down a little and he leans back just a little, so he can turn and meet cas full on in another kiss before turning back to look out at the normal neighbourhood sam’s found himself in.

“do you think we could do something like this? cookie cutter house. you me and the kid?” dean asks.

“if you think you’re prepared to let the bunker go, i don’t see why not,” cas responds.

the thought of turning the bunker’s lights out for good makes dean feel a certain kind of way. still, though. now it’s a thought that’s popped into his head. who knows.

for now, he’s content to stand there with his angel, looking out at the other backyards, at the stars while their respective kids sleep in the house.

#deancas #deancasfic #destielfic #HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAN #what's up it's 2 am and ive got WORMS in my brains #but this is cute.. i think.#.txt

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tyunniverse · 4 years

Text

Midnight Crisis

pairing: huening kai x reader

genre: fluff (?)

word count: 1728

synopsis: huening kai gets woken up by his neighbor's alarm every midnight and finally decides to do something about it

There it is again.

Kai lies awake in his bed, eyes heavy and dark circles evident. He stares at the ceiling, trying his best to cancel out the noise that's been plaguing his mind for countless nights but to no avail. He's grown to hate the noise with each passing day. It's been like this ever since he moved in two months ago.

The first night was bearable, he'd assumed that his neighbor had something important to do at midnight. After all, it wasn't unusual for a college student to be up that late to finish an assignment. The first week was excusable. Kai figured that they must be working on an extremely important project that couldn't wait until morning to be finish. The next few weeks were hell. He thought he'd be immune to the alarm blasting through his walls but he wasn't. It sounds off for five minutes and after that, waits another five minutes more to go off again. His suffering doesn't end until it nears 1 am, and if he's lucky, it'll end before 00:30. This became the norm for Kai.

But the alarm had been going off for more than an hour. A hundred thoughts go through Kai's mind. Should he just try to go back to sleep? At this point that seemed impossible. He'd tried a hundred times before and it never worked. Should he just stay up until it ends? He'd be tired by morning but that's the safest possible decision. But what if this goes on until sunrise? He can't risk falling asleep in class when he had a presentation first thing in the morning.

Kai bunches the his blanket in his hands. "Why me?" He groans, shifting to the side to check his phone. His classmate, Beomgyu, had left him a message a few hours ago.

Hyuka, I can't make it to class tomorrow. I'm at the hospital with my roommate. Sorry, but I think you have to do the presentation on your own tomorrow. I promise I'll make it up to you.

Great.

Given the news and the loud pinging of the alarm, Kai decides that he has had enough. He can't deal with the stupid alarm going off every night, especially when he really needed the rest.

He hops out off bed, grabbing a hoodie from his closet and putting it over his shirt before storming out of his room.

—

You were beyond tired.

The classes you had on that day had all conducted tests, leaving your brain fried by the time you got home. You immediately pass out once you reached the comfort of your bed, not even caring to change out of your clothes. Your mind peacefully drifts into sleep, remembering that you had something to look forward to at 1 am.

You never forget to set your alarm. Sometimes, it was hard waking up in the middle of the night when you're having such a good time sleeping, but you made sure that it went off every five minutes until you're forcibly awoken by it's blaring sound.

The drama your best friend, Soobin, had recommended to you had been the highlight of your day since the beginning of the semester. School has been nothing but the source of your stress and you found that watching the new episodes every night helped you get through it and prepare yourself for anything to come. Little did you know that your energy booster had become the bane of someone else's existence.

"Excuse me!"

You were woken up by the sound of loud banging on your door. Having just come to your senses, your eyes wander to you phone that had been blasting your alarm since 12 am. You reach out to it, checking the time and panicking once you saw that it was way past the time slot for your drama. It was about to finish.

"Shit." You scramble towards your laptop, hoping to at least see if there was still hope to watch it until your attention was brought back to the loud banging on your door.

"Excuse me! Is anyone in there?"

You frown. "Who the hell disturbs people in the middle of the night?"

The place was quiet for a while until the banging came back. You take one last glance at your laptop before treading towards the door. You grab anything heavy along the way in case things get a little weird with your unexpected visitor.

Kai rubs his eyes as he waits for his neighbor's door to swing open. His ears perk up when he hears shuffling behind the door. It opens for about an inch wide, raising a few questions in Kai's mind.

"Do you need something?" You speak out from behind the door.

Kai's brows knit as he leaned a little closer. "It's me, Huening Kai, from room 208. I need to talk to you about something but isn't refusing to open your door a little rude?"

"Oh, sorry." You relax once you realize that the visitor wasn't a threat. You'd seen him a lot on your way to your room but you've never interacted before. All you know was that he seemed like a pretty nice guy. "Ah," You look up at him. He looked kinda cute despite his tired look. His messy hair had almost entirely covered his eyes and his hoodie had a molang print on the side. "But isn't it also a little rude to bang at your neighbor's door at 1 am?" You ask him, brows raised.

Kai purses his lips, trying his best to hold off on snapping at you. He was truly at his limit. "Not when that neighbor has kept me up for the past two months with their stupid alarm?"

"What are you— oh." You cut yourself off upon realizing the entirety of the situation. Maximum volume. You had set your alarm at maximum volume to make sure you never missed an episode. It had barely been effective on you but it sure did its work on your neighbor. In hindsight, you should've seen this coming.

Kai watches as you space out and decides to just tell you then and there instead of waiting for you to invite him inside. "Uh, listen." His hands fidget, trying to get through the awkwardness. "You must have something important to do but please be responsible with your alarm. It's ringing has kept me awake since the start of the semester and I haven't gotten a good night's sleep since. I have a presentation later and I really need to get some sleep before that, so can you please tone the alarm down or just shut if off? I don't think I can survive another night like this."

There he had it.

Kai felt a bit better. He should've done this sooner. His problems would've been solved by then. He figured that you'd apologize and stop your alarms since by now, the two of you have probably reached an understanding.

"I understand your side, I really do." You tell him, looking up at his now smiling form. "But I can't lower the volume." His smile disappears.

"What?"

"I can't wake up if it's not at maximum volume. Please understand, I need this in order to wake up." You insist.

Kai didn't know how to react. He'd been so sure that you'd cooperate that any other responses would have rendered his mind blank. "What?" He repeats. "Then, can you at least tell me why it's so important for you to be awake at this hour?"

You cant. You can't tell him.

The moment he finds out that you were willing to sacrifice his sleep for the drama you've been watching, he'd never let you hear the end of it. "I have a project and it needs to be finished by tomorrow."

Kai crosses his arms, frowning. "So you're saying you have an important project every single night?"

You hold your breath. "Yes?"

"Yes?" Kai scoffs. "Please tell me you're joking."

"I'm serious!" You wage him off. "I really do have one!"

Kai takes a peek at your room and sighs. "Then bring it here. The least you can do is prove that you're telling the truth. I can't keep suffering like this, Y/N."

Hearing your name made you nervous. Of course he'd known your name, he had delivered your packages a few times when it ended up in front of his doorstep by mistake. What's worse, he wanted you to show him the project you made up on the spot to hopefully escape the situation. Your mind goes blank, and there's only one thng that passes through it despite being fully aware that this solution was only temporary.

"I'm sorry!"

"Huh?"

Kai freezes in his spot as the door slams shut in his face. He hears you run back imto the safety of your room and he's left standing there, speechless. It takes him a few seconds to register what had just happened.

"Hey!" He reaches out for your door knob, twisting it a few times before giving up and knocking on the door. "Y/N? Y/N! Open up! We're still not done talking!" He knocks a few more times. "Hey!"

You snicker, hellbent on ignoring him and focusing on what's left of your show. Even if it's just the ending of the episode, it was enough to at least get you through tomorrow.

The episodes starts loading after a few clicks and you move to get your headphones. That's when you realize that Kai had finally stopped bothering you for the night. A smile creeps in your face as you feel a mixture of relief and guilt. "I'm sorry, Kai, but I need this."

You plug your headphones in and was about to focus on the episode when a loud alarm starts blasting through the walls of your room. Eyes wide, you check your phone to see if your alarm had beem turned off. It had been dead ever since you got up, which meant that the sound could only be coming from the room next door.

You jump when you hear a rather loud laugh coming from Kai's room, followed by him banging on your shared wall. Your phone buzzes with a notification and you check it.

Hey there, neighbor! If I'm not gonna get any sleep then so are you. Suffer with me >3<

#txt imagines #txt x reader #txt imagine #huening kai imagines #huening kai x reader #huening kai fluff

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misstrashchan · 4 years

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The Man With Two Souls, Pt. 2

Okay, so this ended up being a fucking long part 2 to my previous meta post. There was a lot I wanted to get down, and if it doesn't make sense or you don't agree with it, that's fine, I'd just be happy if you read it. Now I can rest until the finale comes and beats me up.

So, there's a few more Salem and Adam parallels to start off with like

(8) Having the same reaction to hearing someone mention Blake and Oz and the possibility of them getting the upper hand against them

(9) Chronologically after this happens (we see Adam destroy the throne room in Volume 6 episode 2, but we see him lose his mask at the end of the Adam trailer) deciding to go after Blake on his own while Salem creates the winged Beringel grimm and plans to go to Atlas herself, presumably to go after Oscar/Ozpin so he doesn't get in the way of her plans (as well as Ruby since she clearly needs her as well)

"If you want something done right, you do it yourself" - Volume 6 Chapter 13

(10) Adam and Salem telling Blake and Oz about how they're going to destroy them and those around them

"The ability to derive strength from hope is undoubtedly mankind's greatest attribute. Which is why I will focus all of my effort to snuff it out. How does it feel? Knowing that all your time and effort has been for nothing. That your guardians have failed you. That everything you've built will be torn down before your very eyes."

"So you send your guardians, your huntsman and huntresses. And when they fail and you turn to your smaller soul, know that you send her to the same pitiful demise. This is the beginning of the end, Ozpin. And I can't wait to watch you burn." - Salem, Volume 3 Chapter 12

"What you want is impossible! But I understand. Because all I want is you, Blake. And as I set out and deliver the justice mankind so greatly deserves, I will make it my mission to destroy everything you love. Starting with her." - Adam, Volume 3 Chapter 11

(11) Salem and Adam's perception of Oz and Blake affecting their perspective of themselves... and the audience.

Okay, this one's honestly kind of weird. For so, so long there were a lot of people who bought into the idea that Ozpin was secretly evil or somehow worse than Salem, or that he'd done something terrible and unforgivable to Salem. I fully admit, I was one of those people. I mean, I didn't think he was evil, but the way Salem talked to him at the end of volume 3, listening to the song Divide, I thought, he must have done something bad to Salem, right? How could she hate him so much otherwise?

And the worst thing he did... was leave her. When he couldn't go along with being a genocidal dictator of the whole world alongside Salem, and didn't want their children to be a part of that either.

And as for Adam, he tells Blake that she hurt him more than anybody because she left him.

"All sorts of people hurt me in all sorts of different ways. But no one hurt me quite like you, Blake. You didn't leave scars. You just left me alone." - Adam, Volume 6 Chapter 12

And Salem would also have been hurt from Ozma trying to leave her. Especially when you think about her backstory, how she was kept isolated in a tower, and instead of finding freedom in the outside world, found it in Ozma. And then he died, and she was alone again. And then the Gods destroyed humanity, and Salem is left alone one again for god knows how long.

"Once again, Salem was alone." - Volume 6 Chapter 3

And weirdly, similar to Ozpin there were people who bought into Adam's false perception of Blake too. That Blake is somehow the one who hurt Adam more than he hurt her (which is, completely insane).

And Salem and Adam want Oz and Blake to feel that way. To be paralyzed with self hatred and doubt, to be stuck in the past, and feel as if everything is their fault. That Salem and Adam are their responsibility, at first to save them, and then to stop them.

You see it with Adam's gaslighting, trying to paint her as an unfaithful coward. And I mean, just listen to the song Divide. The whole song is Salem trying to make out Ozpin to be the villain, that she's killing people but the real murderer is him for trying to give people hope, even if it was hope based on a desperate lie.

"It was you who ended their lives! Made them to dig their own graves! With your dark, sick, cruel design, convinced them their world could be saved." - Divide

And there were a lot of people convinced by Salem's song Divide that Ozpin was far worse than he really was, to the point it was surprising that he hadn't wronged Salem in some way like most people were expecting.

And Adam tries to make Blake believe that she's a coward, that she's selfish and weak, that running away from her problems is all she knows how to do.

And for a long while, Blake believed he was right. That she was toxic to the people around her, that she made things worse for them. And there were some people in the fandom who thought that she really was this toxic person.

It's actually kind of scary, but Salem and Adam managed to manipulate not only Blake and Oz's perception of themselves, but also the audience as well in how they saw them.

I don't doubt for a moment this is going to extend to Oscar as well if she meets him, that she'll likely try to convince him that he's just Ozpin and that he, Oscar, doesn't matter, and he'll fail and make the same mistakes as their past lives. Which undoubtedly parts of the fandom are going to take Salem's false perception of Oscar to heart as well and believe her.

Which brings me to move on from Blake's parallels with her first "soul" and Ozpin, to her second "soul" and Oscar.

Now Blake alluding to the Man with Two Souls is metaphorical, while in Oscar's case it's very literal, and it's no coincidence she's the one who first introduces us to the concept to us with the book she's reading during the Shining Beacon.

"...It's about a man with two souls. Each fighting for control over his body"

(It's important to note that the conflict between the two souls is not one of Good vs Evil)

Blake's conflict of her two metaphorical souls fighting for control, is the false perception Adam had of Blake and who she used to be with him, her past that she can't escape, and the struggle for her smaller, more honest soul, trying to define herself and decide who she wants to be. And for Oscar, he's struggling to define himself and decide who he wants to be, because of the merge with Ozpin, and that his past will become Oscar's too.

Both of them want to do the right thing and rise to their challenges, but it seems like such an impossible task to them that they're afraid to meet it.

"I'm... scared. I'm more scared than I've ever been. Than I ever thought was possible. I always knew I wanted to be more than a farmhand. But this? Who would ask for this?" - Oscar, Volume 5 Chapter 5

"I joined the Academy because I knew that Huntsman and Huntresses were regarded as the most noble warriors in the world. Always fighting for good. But I never really thought past that. When I leave the Academy what will I... How can I undo so many years of hate?" - Blake, Volume 2, Chapter 10

But the person who sees Blake's "other soul" the person she's truly capable of being, who she really is, even when she can't herself, is Yang.

"I'm sure you'll figure something out. You're not one to back down from a challenge Blake." - Yang, Volume 2 Chapter 10

And the one who sees Oscar and who he's capable of being even when he can't himself, is Ruby.

"Hey Oscar? I know this isn't going to be easy. But the fact that you're trying says a lot about you. You're braver than you think." - Ruby, Volume 5 Chapter 5

Blake and Oscar are also the first people we see Yang and Ruby open up to about their past trauma. The difference between the two being that in the Burning the Candle scene Yang is more willing to be vulnerable around Blake, to let her guard down and open up to her about her abandonment issues and how they've affected her.

Because as a more emotionally mature character she understands she needs to do that in order to properly relate to Blake so she can offer her support. She gets frustrated however when Blake still refuses her support, and so she has to give her a push to accept it.

Ruby, however, isn't as emotionally mature as Yang, and doesn't find it easy to let down her guard and talk about her emotions. Her mentality being described as "I don't have time for my emotions, I've got to make sure everybody else is okay" - RWBY Rewind: Ruby Rose Rewinds With Us

She feels like she constantly needs to be a pillar of strength and support for everyone around her as a leader. She has a hard time opening up about her own feelings and being vulnerable around others. For her, it seems much more natural to internalize those feelings rather than face them head on. As a leader, she feels she isn't supposed to show fear or doubt. If she admits how she's hurting or how scared she is, she'd be afraid of those around her losing faith.

Ironically, it's Ozpin's words of advice to her that enforce this mentality

"But if you aren't constantly performing at your best, what reason do you give others to follow you?"

So even though only a minute ago Oscar saw that Ruby was clearly upset over something (being reminded of Penny's death)

Ruby then goes on to act like nothing's wrong when she then attempts to reassure Oscar. And it feels like a performance, and though Ruby genuinely does want to reassure him, it comes across as insincere to him. He's frustrated because Ruby isn't being honest about how she's feeling, and is only concerned with his feelings.

So in the Dojo scene we have Oscar start to push Ruby past that flawed mentality that Ozpin enforced, to be more honest about how she's feeling, to talk about how the Fall of Beacon and the loss of Phyrra and Penny affected her, how she's afraid of Salem killing people she cares about, and that she'd kill anyone regardless.

And with both Ruby and Yang opening up about their past experiences they can relate to Blake and Oscar's own fears, doubts and insecurities. Blake's need for answers and Oscar's fear of the fight with Salem, and Yang's need for answers and Ruby's fear of the fight with Salem.

"I told you! I'm not telling you to stop! I haven't. To this day I still want to know what happened to my mother and why she left me. But I will never let that search control me. We're going to find the answers we're looking for Blake. But if we destroy ourselves in the process what good are we?" - Yang, Volume 2 Chapter 6

"I am scared! But not just for me. What happened at Beacon shows that Salem doesn't care if you're standing against her or not. She'll kill anybody. And that, scares me most of all. Phyrra... Penny... I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt. That I didn't think about them every day since I lost them. That I didn't wish I had spent more time with them. If it had been me instead, I know they would have kept fighting too. No matter how dangerous it was. So that's what I choose to do. To keep moving forward." - Ruby, Volume 5 Chapter 5

And by demonstrating their own resolve, as well as their belief in the kind of people Blake and Oscar are capable of being that inspires them to be that person.

"I'm. Not. Running."

"You. Will." - Blake and Adam, Volume 3 Chapter 11

"She made a choice. To put others before herself. And so do I."

"Then you've chosen death." - Oscar and Hazel, Volume 5 Chapter 12

There's also Blake expressing her doubt in Yang during volume 3 after she attacked Mecury, causing Yang to question her own judgement.

She compares it to how Adam used to attack people, and of course she knows Yang wouldn't do something like that without good reason, but she can't but feel like the situation is very familiar. And Blake knows Yang isn't Adam, and makes it clear that she's decided to trust Yang.

"I want to trust you. I will trust you." - Volume 3 Chapter 8

But despite that, Blake's words do still weigh on her mind even when she's alone, where Qrow comes to talk to her about what happened and reassure her, and then they end up talking about her mum.

And then with Ruby in volume 7, Oscar expresses his doubt in Ruby in her decision to lie and hide the truth from Ironwood, comparing it to how Ozpin did the same to them, which, similar to Yang, causes Ruby to question her own judgement. And obviously he knows Ruby isn't Ozpin, that she probably had a good reason for lying. But again, the situation just feels so familiar.

But ultimately he decides to put his trust in Ruby, even before Ironwood.

"I do believe in you. But not only you." - Volume 7 Chapter 7

And by episode 9 they're both on the same page in deciding to choose the truth over fear. (if only James could have stayed on that page too)

Similarly to Yang, we see Ruby alone in episode 4 of volume 7, and you can tell Oscar's words are still weighing on her mind, as Qrow comes over to talk to her and she asks him if she is like Ozpin, and he reassures her that she's not, and then they end up talking about her mother.

Okay, so I'm going to go out on a limb here, and you can call me out on my bullshit if you like, but I'm making a prediction (like, 12 hours from the finale, but hey, it might happen later in the series for all I know)

If we're going full in on the parallels here, remember how Yang lost an arm trying to protect Blake from Adam, and afterwards Blake ends up leaving Yang like Raven, believing she'd be better off without her?

And how Salem is on her way to Atlas after hearing Ozpin had reincarnated, the foreshadowing for Ruby losing an eye and them bringing up her trauma around Summer in Chapter 11?

On top of her wanting Ruby alive?

I'm gonna guess Ruby loses an eye trying to protect Oscar, and then afterwards either Oscar or Ruby tries to sacrifice and give themselves up to Salem, except it ends up being a hollow sacrifice like Summer's

"I didn't have a choice I did what I had to do I made a sacrifice but forced a bigger sacrifice on you!" - Red like Roses Part 2

Because Salem would end up taking both of them either way. I actually can't imagine a scenario where she doesn't, because she needs both of them. But one of them has a worse fate, a "bigger sacrifice" in store for them when they reach Evernight (which I'm still thinking is Ruby)

#rwby #ozpin #oscar pine #yang xiao long #ruby rose #salem #blake belladona #adam taurus #trash meta #thank FUCK I can finally sleep #thanks to anyone who read this to the end #I don't think I'm any good at this but it feels good to just waffle sometimes

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